I noticed the engagement has seemed to be on the decline recently and just wanted to share a bunch of stuff I’ve been working on and that I’ve collected the last couple days. A lot is only loosely related to the Drake/Kendrick stuff, but if you’re bored or find something interesting I’d love to hear some of your thoughts or opinions. If you find any of the info valuable and you’d like to add on that’s just a bonus. I really just want to spark some conversations as per usual. I’m open to valid criticism and if any of my info can be proven false let me know. Also feel free to add any supporting evidence or connections you have made, they are always appreciated!
Recently I started digging and trying to determine what criticism against Kendrick may be valid or not. Starting with a popular one, I personally think the Kodak Black features on Mr Morale were an attempt and possibly a successful one by Kendrick to become a mentor for Kodak. Despite the horrific crimes he committed, I think Kendrick and many other rappers see the potential for Kodak to shed all of the assumptions made about him up to this point and to become one of the biggest voices of his generation. He’s still in my opinion one of if not the most talented Gen Z rappers in the game. Even though what he did should never be forgotten or forgiven, one thing that’s important to keep in mind was Kodak’s upbringing, the environment he grew up in, and his age at the time of his most serious allegations.
In my opinion, Kodak is one the few examples where it’s important to be able to separate the art from the artist and where external factors should even be taken into consideration when deciding the punishment for any crime that’s sexual in nature. As most people know the human brain usually doesn’t stop developing until you’re at least 25, especially the section dedicated to impulse control and decision making. In my opinion, until someone is close to or past that age their brain isn’t fully developed and it’s important to take special consideration when they’re facing the legal system. This is especially true for minors or adults with severe mental handicaps, regardless of the type of crimes they’ve been accused of.
I’m not saying that anyone shouldn’t face severe consequences if found guilty. I just think preventing recidivism should be the primary goal when considering examples like Kodak or any other young black men. Considering all this, I do think external factors should have at least been taken into account if they weren’t already when deciding the length of his sentence. The same thing applies when examining Kodak’s entire life story, including his contributions to Mr Morale. This album is among many things, a testament to how someone can never grow out of all their childhood trauma. Also how so many people who experience prolonged stress or trauma at a young age often end up becoming products of the unhealthy experiences they’ve had throughout their lives.
Even those who dedicate themselves entirely to self-improvement often find many reactive behaviors are hard to deprogram and often can be triggered much later in life no matter how much success they achieve. What most people can control is whether or not they decide to continue this cycle of generational trauma or create a better life for them, their children, and the future leaders in their communities. Something Kendrick clearly resents Drake for is the way he blatantly role plays being a gangster and being “for the culture,” despite his comfy upbringing and glaring evidence stating otherwise. Sometimes it seems like he thinks GTA is the same as real life. Although it’s possible, people who commit all their crimes from the safety of their homes behind a screen typically aren’t given the same respect as those running the streets.
Even though Kodak is from the opposite side of the country and a totally different generation, the way I see it is Kendrick isn’t ignorant, and he wouldn’t have taken the risk of featuring him if it didn’t have a bigger purpose. Remember all the shit he got especially during and after the beef? Clearly there were other motivations, especially considering the fact he rarely features other rappers on his albums. It may even be another example of him baiting Drake with material for disses. Most people who can see these types of things objectively realize they are nuanced and multifaceted issues. It’s funny that him and his fans are still seeming to have difficulty making these realizations themselves.
Judging by some of vivid descriptions Kendrick has provided fans throughout the years of growing up in Compton; it isn’t hard to believe he may have seen some of his younger self in Kodak. I think he chose him because he at least saw some potential most people don’t and possibly to make a statement about how much worse Drake is. It seems like Drake depicts this hardened, street tough, mafioso character who is a product of the streets so people are more forgiving of his indiscretions.
While both Drake and Kodak were old enough to know better when these allegations or offenses occurred, the difference is, Drake has all the money in the world and grew up with a silver spoon. He easily could have pursued acting or even producing movies and TV shows if his acting talent didn’t cut it. I’ll admit I’ve never seen an episode of Degrassi or any other examples of him trying to seriously act, so if he’s brutal at it forgive me. He also could have pursued a variety of businesses and still built the empire he has today. He could have gone the R&B route or if he really was that passionate about rapping he could have kept it fucking real and stayed true to himself. He used to be pretty goofy and straight edge, but as soon as he started acting hard and trying to get people to take him seriously he seemed to start rubbing the majority of the rap game the wrong way.
On the other hand as Kodak has said, he would most likely be selling drugs right now if he didn’t make it in music. I think he’s also very aware there was a good chance he wouldn’t survived this long if he had gone down that road. You can’t fake the type of determination when your life literally depends on whether or not you make it in the game. That’s why many up and coming and even the most established rappers will do anything to get a sliver of the spotlight.
Another reason Drake seems to be almost universally hated in the rap game is because he takes up so much of the spotlight and seems willing to do anything to maintain it. Obviously we don’t know all the details just quite yet, but it doesn’t help that Drake and many other people in the industry have allegedly done things that pale in comparison to any of the crimes committed by Kodak and lot of them still haven’t been held accountable. Even in the rare case they are, they often show no remorse for their actions. I’m looking at you R. Kelly! The worst for me though is when they point fingers at others while they’re doing the same thing or something even worse.The hypocrisy is really what kills me.
It’s also pretty likely Kendrick wanted to use his clout in the industry to help get Kodak’s career back on track and hopefully expedite the process of him overcoming his past. Despite a very long campaign by the media where they were seemingly trying to turn the public against him, it appears like he might just stand a chance. Coincidentally or not, the media attention really seemed to pick up steam after he publicly supported Trump. One thing to keep in mind is the main contributing factor that led to Kodak’s support was Trump commuting his prison sentence.
While it’s still dumb as fuck to say in public, can you really blame the guy? He doesn’t seem very versed in politics, although I try to never judge a book by it’s cover. Who knows he might like his financial policies. He could also be getting paid to say it. I’m guessing the latter is probably more likely. On the other hand I have no problem believing people like DJ Akademiks would suck Trump off if he had the chance.
Admittedly Kodak has made a lot of missteps even after he entered into adulthood and after the Kendrick feature. On the other hand none of them have been close to as severe as the crimes he committed as an adolescent. In the last couple years, most of his struggles have been drug and gun related and a lot were tied to his previous convictions and parole violations. He does seem to be making a little forward process recently, which is nice to see (minus the rock throwing).
I think Kodak can at least go California sober, maybe with some psychedelics, MDMA, and ketamine thrown in there if he wants to party or even for therapeutic reasons. If he can also maintain a steady enough cash flow to pay for a large security detail, some goons, and some bribes, and a solid legal team he could probably avoid a lot of trouble. These things could really help him to fully take advantage of his talent and reach his full potential. (I go into a lot more detail about Kodak’s substance issues, mental health, and possible solutions in part two which I’ll post when I’m done editing.
At this point Kodak’s pretty much just getting way too fucked up, saying and doing a lot of off the cuff shit which is nothing new, and constantly getting pulled over with drugs or guns in the vehicle even if they don’t belong to him. While it doesn’t make them ok, all of these infractions seem to be pretty common amongst a lot of rappers young and old. It’s definitely been a pattern for Kodak ever since his career started taking off a decade ago. Obviously these crimes are often related to obtaining street cred and other superficial reasons, but it doesn’t mean there aren’t other major contributing factors. Most would probably agree at least some of these contributing factors are the results of systemic racism.
As far as I’ve seen, very few people get hounded and targeted by the media like Kodak has his entire career. Considering the fact he’s constantly being targeted by his rivals as well, and the fact he got shot not too long ago, I can understand why he stays high and strapped constantly. The only rappers who arguably may have had it worse were SixNine, King Von, and maybe Xxxtentacion, before the latter two were killed.
Speaking of rappers who died too soon, I always think it’s interesting to look at the events leading up to their deaths. It seems to be an increasingly common trend the last couple years. Some more recent examples include Juice Wrld, Lil Peep, Mac Miller, Pop Smoke, Young Dolph, PnB Rock, Takeoff, and Drakeo the Ruler. I know there are a lot more that I’m missing as well. For a while it seemed like every rapper I started fucking with would die not much later. I thought I was cursed. The number who have been incarcerated is quite high as well including YNW Melly, Bobby Schmurda, 03 Greedo, Meek Mill, TayK, and YB.
What people often neglect to acknowledge is the similarities in a lot of their ages, careers, upbringings, surroundings, and circumstances at the time when all of these controversies occurred. It’s also interesting to look at their labels and who their “rivals” were in the industry. Again it doesn’t mean they should be given any lenience if they did commit any serious crimes; I honestly still can’t believe some of them got off so easily even when taking all these factors into consideration. I have a theory that most of the controversies these young rappers are involved in are often connected to the constant public scrutiny aimed at them from such a young age. There is also the never ending legal battles, the time they spend in prison, and the constant attempts on their lives/careers.
Obviously most people just blame the lyrics in rap music, gang ties, drug addiction, or violent video games, simple problems with simple solutions. Most people want the easy fix and pretty much everyone tries to deflect the blame from themselves. The truth is everyone plays a part in systemic racism, some are the victims, some are the perpetrators, and sometimes the line can be difficult to distinguish between the two. Since white people can’t be victims of systemic racism, they often fight to prove they’re not the perpetrators. Still the truth is, no matter how hard they try, they’re still indirectly part of the problem. As long as they accept and are willing to admit to that fact, most people aren’t going to hold it over them.
When it gets interesting is how the black and white communities treat light skinned and biracial people vs those with dark skin. Another is how Hispanic people are treated when they grow up in black neighborhoods or try to emanate the culture and again how skin tone can make a difference. Does anyone remember the J Lo song where she drops multiple N bombs? It was pretty common when I was growing up for my Hispanic friends to say it with no thought or repercussions. My personal favorite examples of the line being blurred are in the cases of Rachel Dolezal and Jussie Smollett. Whenever I’m reminded of them I can’t help but laugh at the pure absurdity. Again the whole issue of systemic racism is extremely complicated and divisive. At the end of the day no solution is going to please everybody.
The influence of music, specifically rap, is usually a direct product of all these things and not the source. A lot of people who experience what I’m describing or have witnessed it throughout their lives are well aware it’s extremely difficult to fix and there is no “one size fits all” solution. It’s a slow process and while things have improved steadily the past few decades, there is still a long way to go and a lot that needs to be addressed and fixed.
Either way the music about harming or killing others, the drug game, exploiting women, or any other shitty behavior, is often targeted at guys like me, Akademiks, or even Drake. People who didn’t grow up around these types of things and haven’t been traumatized by them from a young age. A lot of the rappers know this and a good amount will do the same thing as Drake and lie or exaggerate their back stories if they really didn’t grow up like that. Most listeners are young, bored, teens or twenty-somethings and could really care less whether it’s the truth as long as it gets the ladies wet when they drive around the ‘burbs with their 8,000 dollar sound systems blasting it and their windows down.
These types of lies and exaggerations can be really dangerous when they involve people who have a lot of influence and money. There’s nothing wrong with listening and enjoying any genre or type of music. The problem is when people start acting out their favorite songs or emanating their favorite entertainers or influencers. It seems more common than not that these people choose the bad traits to adopt into their personalities rather than the good ones. This can be especially toxic when people try to convince others they have to act or behave a certain way to be a rapper or even listen to certain artists or varieties or rap. Rarely do these people stop trying, usually they’d rather do some dumb shit to prove their worthiness.
You often hear about these square, suburban kids who listen to way too much trap and drill music or discover scam rap and end up finding themselves in a lot of trouble. Usually these are the same guys who end up snitching or causing problems for the ones who are really about that life. A good example of people clearly sticking their noses where they don’t belong are SixNine and Akademicz. It’s funny how they’ve always supported each other, even through the snitching and SA allegations. I still want to know what happened to the 14 year old in the tape with Daniel and his homie. Obviously no personal info, but I’ve heard rumors that she disappeared and no one knows what happened.
Although Kodak is 26 now and still has a long way to go, I’m confident he can get it together in the next 5 years, and hopefully he’ll be able to maintain some level of peace and normalcy. One thing I’m very concerned about though is it seems like a lot of the industry, his opps, and the media have all teamed up to make him the next member of the 27 Club. If he can survive to 28, and get clean before 35, he should be able to adapt and learn how to handle the pressure of superstardom.
I truly hope he is able to make it through this period in his life and continue to lead the Florida Soundcloud rap movement, which fell heavily on him after X was murdered. I would hate to see him become just another of the many talented artists in the industry who died much too soon or ended up wasting a good chunk in prison. While I love Ski Mask and he’s an awesome rappeperformer, his output can not come close to reaching Kodak’s level. Even Drake was obsessed with his album Dying to Live, which I agree is fantastic. I think a lot of people overlook Kodak intentionally or not because many don’t see him as a serious artist or can’t get past his history.
Something that has been working in his favor recently is the fact he has been doing a lot of good for his community for many years and has seemed to have taken an interest in philanthropy. Even though it’s a common rapper PR move and it’s often to help their public image more than the community they’re serving, but at least he’s showing some remorse. In my opinion all artists who truly started at the bottom should at least try to give back to the community they harmed with their actions even if their image is squeaky clean. They just need to be careful about living in the same neighborhood once they get famous like Nipsey and Dolph. Chief Keef definitely had it right by moving to LA once it got too dangerous in Chicago.
Interestingly Kodak doesn’t seem to fuck with Drake so much recently, and he may also be on the rocks with DJ AK. Considering the latter has been accused of having his hand in a lot of Florida’s recent rap beefs, deaths, arrests, and other controversies, and has also been accused of snitching, being a confidential informant, a repeated s. offender, and a r. apologist, it’s probably not a bad move on his part. It’s also no surprise most of the real ones in the game see right through his facade.
Most people in the industry know to avoid politics in general and you definitely should avoid publicly supporting Trump or any other politicians considered right-leaning. Kodak, Wayne, and Ye have all gotten massive amounts of shit for it, but if anyone has a solid excuse it’s the former two and possibly A$ap Rocky. I guess because Ye has presidential aspirations and considering his history of mania and possible psychosis he might deserve a little less shit. At least it isn’t as bad as supporting Hitler. Still anyone who hasn’t had a prison sentence commuted by the guy, and even those who have, should probably keep their political opinions to themselves (for example Cardi B and Lil Pump).
I also think there is a good possibility that their public support may have been a motivating factor in their release in the first place considering. Does anyone else find it odd that commuting Kodak’s sentence was one of the last things he did before running for re-election. The fact that AK has seemed to get away with his very public support for Trump and no one really seems to notice or care, (even though they really shouldn’t), just makes me more suspicious he’s working with the Fed’s or their may be some political ties or motivations behind him getting away with all SA’s, setups, and snitching through the years. Obviously it’s more likely no one cares about him enough to even give him any of their energy. Considering everything else though I think there is a definite push by the republican part to win over more voters of color.
Interestingly AK is still marked as a democrat on his voter records. This makes me wonder if his support for Trump could be bullshit and maybe he’s just trying to bait or confuse young rappers into agreeing with his political views so he can take it out of context and hurt their image. Since the majority of the game seems to lean in the other direction with their own political views it kind of makes sense. I could go much deeper, but I’m gonna practice what I preach, leave the politics alone, and get back to Kodak and eventually Kendrick.
There is a long history of Drake seeming to be obsessed with certain up and coming rappers. He especially seems to have taken interest in Kodak, going as far as calling him the best rapper of his generation. Kodak has accused many others of snitching on him in the past. It’s not unlikely one of those people he was referring to were Drake or Akademik’s following Drake’s order. This could explain why there seems to be some animosity there, despite all the love-bombing and dick riding.
Here are some interesting links I wanted to share, along with some theories and possible connections. The links are directly below the descriptions and some have more than one relevant link.
Drake praising Kodak’s album https://genius.com/a/drake-says-kodak-black-s-dying-to-live-is-one-of-his-favorite-albums-of-the-last-five-years
Earl Sweatshirt calling Drake culture vulture in 2015 for trying to ride Kodak’s wave https://hypebeast.com/2018/10/drake-cosigns-kodak-black-earl-sweatshirt-responds
Kodak talking about attempts to take him down https://www.hotnewhiphop.com/341804-kodak-black-says-people-are-trying-to-take-him-down-news
Him playing off Drake cosign https://www.hotnewhiphop.com/368888-kodak-black-says-drake-co-sign-wasnt-a-big-deal-news
Him saying he won’t work with Drake anymore after A$ap collab. This is the only article I could find hinting at any real bad blood between the two. Paints it as jealousy and nothing more https://www.complex.com/music/a/brad-callas/kodak-black-collab-drake-21-savage-her-loss-album
DJ AK discussing beef with Kodak. He briefly mentions in the interview that Kodak accused him of being a snitch, yet I’m still having an incredibly hard time finding any interviews or evidence it ever happened. It may have even been suppressed, because pretty much every video is AK talking shit about Kodak, or from one of the interviews they did. I included the link to the transcript of the interview where AK claims that Kodak had accused him of snitching. https://www.summarize.tech/www.youtube.com/watch?v=boNZy1MwVF0
Kodak speaking highly about his connection with Kendrick. https://www.reddit.com/KendrickLamacomments/wljoj0/kodak_interview_about_kendrick/
I believe that Drake possibly tried to exasperate Kodak’s addiction issues by sending him 600,000 in crypto for no reason. I’d bet he’s probably sent him a lot more because he started co-signing him before he even turned 18. I wonder if part of his 400 million dollar deal requires him to use a percentage of the money to recruit artists. On the other hand it could be to help take them out the acquisition of blackmail on whoever causes them problems or refuses to sign their blood contract. Drake always hyped Kodak up and was a huge supporter, up until recently. It seems around 2022, the same year as his Kendrick feature, Kodak seemed to start getting pretty disenchanted with Drake. It also could be possible that Drake may have distanced himself for PR reasons, considering both of their histories it’s hard to tell. Didn’t Kendrick say he didn’t want to be seen with anyone blacker than him? I wonder if it’s related to the issues with A$ap. Kodak was apparently pissed that he did a song with Drake, when Drake had been stringing him along with the same promises, but was being flaky.
More Drake cosigns https://www.rap-up.com/2022/01/11/drake-co-signs-kodak-black/?amp
https://thesource.com/2023/07/22/kodak-black-drake-favorite-rappe
I also worry that Kodak may have gotten wrapped up in the current drama with Drake, Kendrick, Ye, AK, Cole, and possibly Diddy and other big industry hitters. Obviously it’s very likely this could paint an even larger target on his back. Based on all my knowledge of the situation I believe it’s reasonable to assume team Drake/Akademiks/UMG may be partially responsible for some of Kodak’s recent issues. This could also help explain the media’s obsessive coverage of Kodak and his every mistake. Even taking his history into account, it seems pretty excessive for his level of fame and influence. I hope he is able to beat the odds even though they seem to be stacked against him. Hopefully if my theory about Kendrick’s mentorship has some weight, it will help him take the final steps needed to get his shit together and protect his safety and career.
More info about Mr Morale features https://www.xxlmag.com/kendrick-lamar-backlash-kodak-black-morale-big-steppers/
Article about Kodak’s philanthropy https://hiphopdx.com/news/kodak-black-wants-to-be-known-as-a-philanthropist
It seems like a lot of people may be trying to take him out. https://www.tallahassee.com/story/news/2022/02/15/3-people-and-kodak-black-shot-los-angeles-super-bowl-party/6795686001/
Kodak proclaimed to be Hebrew Israelite after his prison stay, Kendrick is also known to identify with the group. https://forward.com/fast-forward/374727/first-kendrick-lamar-now-kodak-black-another-rapper-goes-hebrew-israelite/
Getting back to Kendrick, another controversial claim thrown at him was that he was allegedly a big supporter of R Kelly. The article below explains why it’s most likely bullshit and also contains an example of Kendrick’s history of taking on the industry. I’m sure he may have been influenced by R. Kelly’s music because most artists are, but I’ve personally never seen him personally vouch for the guy and his behavior. I just think he’s mature enough to separate art from the artist. The article linked below makes it pretty clear that Kendrick wasn’t the main deciding factor in this whole Spotify issue. Again it’s all about the money as usual. https://pitchfork.com/news/kendrick-label-head-confirms-he-threatened-to-pull-music-from-spotify/
Another example of Kendrick going against the industry is when he formed his current label, pgLang which he splits 50/50 with Dave Free. He started the label in 2022, and uses an independent online distributor to release his music ever since. I imagine at some point he’ll probably try to buy Dave out if he hasn’t already. I’m sure the article below describes the origins of the name, but knowing Kendrick it very well could have a hidden significance or multiple meanings. This may be interesting to some people and I’m curious to hear any theories. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/PGLang
The Reddit post linked below contains an interesting counter example to the precious examples. It alleges Kendrick recently used Interscope, a UMG subsidiary, for licensing on one of the diss tracks. This may show some type of financial motivation behind the beef, and although it’s different from signing a legit deal, some may still see it as being a bit hypocritical. Every musician I know personally is independent, but I’m sure someone who knows more about the industry and can explain in more detail why he made the decision. There’s probably a good chance it was for legal reasons, like using a sample from one of the many artist’s masters that the labels usually have ownership of. https://www.reddit.com/KendrickLamacomments/1chdi9today_confirms_kendrick_is_still_on_interscope/
Another example of a rapper who was caught lying about their ties to the industry was Young Dolph. He’s still one of my favorite rappers of all time, and I respected his honesty when he publicly admitted to it. Most of his real fans took his side, but there is always the chance he only did it because someone threatened to blow up his spot or was messing with his money. In his defense there is also a good chance his life, career, or someone he loved may have been threatened or blackmailed to force his hand. https://www.xxlmag.com/young-dolph-admits-signed-two-major-record-label-deals/
https://www.hotnewhiphop.com/203958-young-dolph-sounds-off-i-shouldve-never-signed-this-fu-n-deal-news
To his credit, he still went on to turn down a 22 million dollar record deal so he could keep his masters and ownership of his label. Sadly he was killed not long after this after multiple assassination attempts linked to Yo Gotti, or someone associated with him. no surprise his own label has been doing great since Dolph was killed. Dolph’s label, Paper Route Empire, was always extremely competitive with Yo Gotti’s. The different is one was independent and one was signed under a bigger label. Guess which one was which. The sheer amount of “coincidences” like this make it difficult to believe all of these examples don’t have some connection. https://finance.yahoo.com/news/young-dolph-retained-ownership-masters-191557215.html#:~:text=The%20Mic%20report%20later%20showed,to%20remain%20an%20independent%20artist.&text=Soon%20after%2C%20he%20signed%20with,have%20ownership%20of%20his%20masters.
Young Dolph is just one of many incredibly talented artists who died senselessly and much too soon. Many of the other artists also seemed to also have a history of speaking out against the industry. One of my favorite Dolph songs is actually titled “Shittin’ on the Industry. For anyone who didn’t follow his career too closely, the song “Play Wit Yo’ Bitch” is what sparked the beef and still to this day is my favorite diss track of all time. His next album 100 Shots was almost entirely dedicated to him trolling Yo Gotti after a failed assassination attempt.
Dolph is a great example of what happens when artists don’t sign a deal, but are still able to break through and compete financially with artists on major labels. Sadly many who do sign a deal usually end up getting fucked and face similar consequences if they try to leave or make too much trouble for their label. Ye is one of the few living examples of major artists who got out of their deal without dying prematurely, ending up in prison, or being left completely destitute. https://www.reddit.com/Kanye/comments/zz49to/okay_so_whats_the_deal_with_this_guy_almost/
Below is an interesting interview Ye gave in 2022, around the same time as his antisemitism scandal and him breaking his contract with UMG. Although I don’t support his politics and will be the first to call him out when he says something stupid, he’s still in my opinion one of the most relatable, honest, and decent billionaires. Although I don’t consider myself a god or a genius, I do find myself agreeing with about 90 percent of the stuff he says. In this interview he speaks about the media, Kim being super shady after divorce, systemic racism, Diddy, and much more. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=OqkgyU-Tu84
If you haven’t seen his recent interview with The Download he speaks directly about Drake and his relationship with Lucian Grainge, the industry and some of their shady tactics, and covers a few more somewhat relevant topics. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ADSa-OSliak
Sometimes I wonder if Diddy is intentionally martyring himself, sort of like what Kanye did with his career. This may be a misguided attempt to try to make up for his past crimes. It could also be argued that it’s the best way someone could repent for such terrible sins. Recently it seems like Diddy may be trying to change the industry to make a better environment for future artists. He also seems to be trying to promote religious morals and values he previously disregarded. Although this another classic PR move. Both him and Ye have been very vocal about their religious beliefs lately, which is another thing that most celebrities typically avoid speaking about publicly. Who knows he may genuinely think this is necessary for him to stand a chance at escaping an eternity in the Christian version of hell. Obviously this is a big reach, but the article below, along with his recent instagram posts, kind of lend to these theories. https://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment-arts-66716206.amp
Sorry for another tangent, I’ll get back to Kendrick again. Here are some more allegations leveled by Drake and his fans along with some evidence that may point to whether they are true or not. One thing Kendrick does admit to in a few songs through multiple albums is his difficulty resisting temptation and his promiscuity. I think based on his track record of honesty and transparency, he probably has cheated on Whitney in the past. This is obviously scummy behavior and could explain the rumors that they were separated or having issues in their marriage.
Another one of the allegations made by Drake included Whitney having a kid with Dave Free unbeknownst to Kendrick. There definitely isn’t enough evidence to sufficiently draw any conclusions, but there are some possible connections that could be seen as contributing evidence. As i was told in the comments, Dave Free left TDE in 2019, then Kendrick after the release of his final album. Still this may have had to do with TDE signing under UMG. As far as I know he never denied the claims Drake made, but if I’m wrong I’ll update this part.
While their relationship still seems pretty good, a lot of times artists have to pretend to be friendly to their label owners or they risk having their careers or reputations damaged and possibly even worse. Kendrick seems to be very aware of this fact and I can see him playing dumb or knowing and pretending he doesn’t because he seems to always be very strategic and patient enough to play the long game. If there is any truth to these claims he may be waiting until he can get the full ownership of his label and rights to all his masters before putting Dave on blast too.
Here are some of my favorite examples of artists pretending to like each other featuring some relevant faces. I love how none of them smile lol
This was apparently when Ye and Jay Z squashed their beef. https://consequence.net/2019/12/kanye-jayz-awkward-reunion/amp/
This was after Ye and Drake apparently squashed their beef. Very convincing… https://people.com/music/kanye-west-hangs-out-with-drake-after-saying-he-wants-to-put-rappers-feud-to-rest/
Ye looking a little suspicious of Drake again https://highxtar.com/en/the-drama-between-kanye-and-drake-in-a-nutshell/
Weirdly Drake and Jay Z seem pretty buddy buddy sometimes, but also have a kind of back and forth history. https://www.instagram.com/p/B9MZWhZnz3w/?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet
The three also all collaborated on a single from Drake’s album Views. https://www.eonline.com/news/754168/drake-drops-new-music-with-kanye-west-and-jay-z
Later their appearances on Drake’s song, and their collaborative album were involved in the Tidal v Apple bs. https://www.businessinsider.com/kanye-west-no-watch-the-throne-2-jay-z-due-to-tidal-apple-rivalry-2016-10?amp
What is this a crossover episode? https://powerboise.com/kanye-west-diddy-drake-fought-yeezy-fashion-show-jay-z-broke-up/
Another weird crossover. Either these guys are fake as press on nails or they’re all just playing up the drama for money, fame, or more attention. https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-lists/kanye-west-jay-z-50-cent-diddy-onstage-together-240230/
Bonus Illuminati pic, Jay or Ye always looked like they didn’t trust each other. Again it could be for the media, but I just find it hilarious considering everyone thought they were best friends after Watch the Throne. They do have a very long history of working together, but like any other work relationship, their money seems to come first. It seems like business interests always take priority over work friendships. https://people.com/music/kanye-west-jay-z-friendship-timeline/
Also my all time favorite picture of Big and Puff in the 90’s https://www.reddit.com/Hiphopcirclejerk/comments/1b3v7wb/biggie_always_kept_an_eye_on_diddy/
Throughout the years many stories have surfaced of label owners intentionally interfering in their artist’s relationship or personal lives. I love how Suge made fun of Diddy for dancing in all of his artists videos. I’ve also mentioned Al B. Sure and how Diddy stole his wife and raised his son and previously went into the whole alleged Kanye, Drake, Kim Kardashian love triangle and all the other rappers partners Drake pursued. There are lots of other examples, but this is just to support the possibility that Dave Free may have had an affair with Whitney to get leverage over Kendrick. https://www.billboard.com/music/rb-hip-hop/throwback-thursday-suge-knight-diddy-1995-source-awards-6363520/amp/
If it turned out Drake is right and Kendrick really is raising Dave’s child, that could obviously really hurt Kendrick and his family. It could also severely damage his reputation in the industry. This may explain how Dave owns half the rights to Kendrick’s label, despite him appearing to have the desire to go fully independent. I might be wrong, but I can’t imagine Kendrick really needs Dave for anything.
While it seemed like they were very tight in the first picture I included from the beginning of 2022, the second photo is from another photo shoot at the end of 2022, and I could be wrong, but they both look a bit uncomfortable. Coincidentally the first picture was right before Kendrick officially left TDE and announced his second child publicly when he released Mr. Morale a few months with his wife and kids on the cover. While these all could be used as evidence to support the infidelity rumors, as I’ve said it also could have been the deal with UMG which was not long before Kendrick announced to the public he was leaving Top Dawg around the end of 2021. There is still a very good possibility there is no tension at all and they’re still friends and partners like most people seem to believe. A bunch of randomly selected photos and a couple loose connections only get you so far. While Drake may know something we don’t for all we know it may never be revealed publicly or even discussed. https://variety.com/2020/music/news/kendrick-lamar-signs-with-universal-music-publishing-1234816664/
I had to cut this post in half because apparently there is a character limit on posts. I’ll post part two in a minute. The rest is mostly bonus features and links to supporting evidence. It also includes a lot of random loosely connected issues I’ve been researching and writing about, along with a few personal anecdotes that I think are interesting and people may find relevant. I should be done editing the rest by tomorrow evening and depending on how long it ends up I’ll most likely have to do a part four and possibly five.
With gratitude,
The Randomest Moniker

If you want to receive this as a daily email in your inbox, you can now join at this link

worldnews

• PauloPatricio

France vs. 'Shrinkflation': Starting July 1, All 'Shrinked' Products Must Be Labelled For Consumers
Comments Link

• DekiTree

French police kill man trying to 'burn synagogue'
Comments Link

• Unusual-State1827

More than 60% of world’s coral reefs may have bleached in past year, U.S. agency says
Comments Link

news

• RaffyGiraffy

Florida teen says she was denied entry to prom for wearing a suit
Comments Link

• a_dogs_mother

Teen died from eating a spicy chip as part of social media challenge, autopsy report concludes
Comments Link

• DavianVonLorring

A Lakota graduate’s plume was cut from her cap. The Farmington district remains silent.
Comments Link

science

• mvea

Social progressives were more likely to view rape as equally serious or more serious than homicide compared to social conservatives. Progressive women were particularly likely to view rape as more serious than homicide, suggesting that gender plays a critical role in shaping these perceptions.
Comments Link

• mvea

A new technique has allowed scientists to freeze human brain tissue so that it regains normal function after thawing. Scientists have successfully frozen and thawed brain organoids and cubes of brain tissue from a 9-year-old girl with epilepsy.
Comments Link00121-8)

• Wagamaga

Glimpse of next-generation internet. Scientists established the practical makings of the first quantum internet by entangling two quantum memory nodes separated by optical fiber link deployed over a roughly 22-mile loop through Cambridge, Somerville, Watertown, and Boston
Comments Link

space

• ubcstaffer123

Huge, solar flare-launching sunspot has rotated away from Earth. But will it return? The sunspot AR3664 may not be done with us just yet.
Comments Link

• slowburnangry

Europa's Icy Crust Is 'Free-Floating' Across the Moon's Hidden Ocean, New Juno Images Suggest
Comments Link

• OlympusMons94

Europe is uncertain whether its ambitious Mercury probe can reach the planet
Comments Link

Futurology

• Hot_Transportation87

Microsoft's Emissions Spike 29% as AI Gobbles Up Resources
Comments Link

• Worldly_Flow9133

Researchers at the University of Washington developed deep-learning algorithms that allow users to pick which sounds to filter through their headphones in real-time
Comments Link

• chrisdh79

Frozen human brain tissue works perfectly when thawed 18 months later Scientists in China have developed a new chemical concoction that lets brain tissue function again after being frozen.
Comments Link

AskReddit

• Accomplished-Cat-325

What insult that deeply hurt you won't you forget?
Comments Link

• BlastingSquid886

What is a good movie to watch while drunk?
Comments Link

• ccie6861

What embarrassing or disturbing thing have you found while helping a friend move?
Comments Link

todayilearned

• LeftNeck9994

TIL Multiple studies have found that an extra inch of height can be worth an extra $1,000 a year in wages both for men and women
Comments Link

• tyrion2024

TIL in 2012 LL Cool J broke the nose, jaw, and ribs of a man charged with breaking into his home. His family was sleeping when their home security alarm went off at 1am, "sending LL Cool J into action". After catching the man, he held him until the authorities arrived.
Comments Link

• icanhazkarma17

TIL American composer Kevin MacLeod allows anyone to use his music for free, as long as he receives credit for the song. This has led to his music being used in thousands of films, millions of videos on YouTube.
Comments Link

dataisbeautiful

• jcceagle

[OC] Life expectancy vs. health expenditure
Comments Link

• klokain

Do UFO Sightings Happen Near Airports? Best Locations and Times to Spot a UFO. [OC]
Comments Link

• phatangus

For a majority of Americans, a standard tip when dining at a sit-down restaurant is 15% or less
Comments Link

Cooking

• PreschoolBoole

What’s the most absurd way you cook a food item that you swear is superior?
Comments Link

• Warm_Forever9843

What's your favourite recipe that includes zucchini?
Comments Link

• Bunnyeatsdesign

What rice dishes are not served hot?
Comments Link

food

• mabmab4

[homemade] Chicago Dogs
Comments Link

• Fbeezy

[Homemade] Eggs Florentine
Comments Link

• briblossom

[homemade] Gnocchi
Comments Link

movies

• MarvelsGrantMan136

Tony McFarr, Chris Pratt’s ‘Guardians of the Galaxy’ & ‘Jurassic World’ Stunt Double, Dies at 47
Comments Link

• MarvelsGrantMan136

Francis Ford Coppola’s ‘Megalopolis’ - Review Thread
Comments Link

• hekenwkskdn777728

New LONGLEGS Poster
Comments Link

Art

• Zamaliev_Igor

From a hayfield, Zamaliev _Igor, watercolor, 2024
Comments Link

• papaAnkIES

Flight, Bacriswell2, oil, 2024
Comments Link

• Just_Benefit6810

“Phases”, Adam Feher, Digital Collage, 2021
Comments Link

television

• MarvelsGrantMan136

‘Fallout’ Sets Another Nielsen Streaming Chart Record, Becomes First Non-Netflix Show to Top 2 Billion Minutes Viewed in Consecutive Weeks
Comments Link

• MarvelsGrantMan136

'Shogun' Seasons 2 and 3 in the Works at FX, Hulu; Will Compete in Drama Category at the Emmys
Comments Link

• indig0sixalpha

'X-Men ‘97' understood the power of perfect timing
Comments Link

pics

• Douglasqqq

Jack Black walking around Brighton, England alone.
Comments Link

• Dar-Vin

The portal In Dublin this evening!
Comments Link

• t-o-m-u-s-a

Houston just had severe weather.
Comments Link

gifs

• GrowLapsed

Marijuana Timelapse - 5 Weeks of Flowering Buds
Comments Link

• HappySkullsplitter

We don't need roads
Comments Link

• Squirrelmonkeycom

Europa-pa
Comments Link

educationalgifs

mildlyinteresting

• KingOfAllFishFuckers

I bought another smart car, can park them both in the same space.
Comments Link

• jesusismagic

I have not worn a watch for over 10 years, but you can still see where it used to be on my arm.
Comments Link

• Lancet11

Found out this winter that Crown Royal freezes
Comments Link

interestingasfuck

• ThatCoolBlondeGirl

It’s been 84 years…
Comments Link

• DrFetusRN

*A regular work day at the Temu warehouse *
Comments Link

• NickyPappagiorgio

*Cannabis growing naturally in the Himalayas *
Comments Link

funny

• Thapee

*I just took a photo of my receding hairline yesterday and my reaction was same! *
Comments Link

• OddlyCheap

I was walking to class and saw these bumper stickers
Comments Link

• explosivejoseph

Throuple in the front row of a comedy show
Comments Link

aww

• ughstopbanningme

opened our front door to see this, the mom is still there she just got scared when i opened it.
Comments Link

• Rdhilde18

*Saved a baby possum *
Comments Link

• dmcdaniel87

My dad rescued this little guy
Comments Link
Get this as a daily email!

Do you remember Microsoft 3D Movie Maker? A free demo of it came with Windows 95. If you really liked it, you could buy the full version on CD-ROM. Basically, you could make your own 3D movies using preset actors, props, and scenes. You could even add your own dialogue & sound effects using the computer’s mic. It was such a hit that it developed its own cult fanbase.
A little-known fact is that if you go to the intro page of the talent book and type in “socrates,” you’ll find a live-action featurette on the making of 3D Movie Maker, originally known as “Project Socrates” to the developers. It’s a pretty fun watch, and I highly recommend it!
What I do not recommend, however, is “Project Caligula.”
I am (very begrudgingly) going to explain the process by which you can access Project Caligula. To start, you must make a mobie chooseng Misty City as the scene, and the small café camera angle. As a prop, select the sphere, color it red, flatten it all the way, and put it under the left most table. As actors, select S’kelly and Augustin. Change Augustin’s outfit to the tuxedo and put him in front of the café door, between the tables. Place S’kelly horizontally at his feet. You can do this using the adjustment tools in the part of the toolbar that is initially covered up.
Next, change the music to “Geist Evil Theme.” Select the Sound effect “Laugh Maniac” and place it on Augustin. Finally, make his action “At Rest” and have him stay like that for EXACTLY 17 frames.
Conclude by clicking “New Movie.” A prompt will ask you if you want to save your movie. Do so and save it as “caligula” (all lower case, no quotes). When the screen comes up, go to “Open Movie” and select caligula. Unlike other movies, whose preview pics are the first frame of the film, the screenshot will be a 3D graphic of the phrase “Welcome To Hell” in the font Bloody (which is not available in the original edition of the game) in front of a black background.
When you open the movie, instead of the preview pic, you will see a solid red background. Again, this is the first of many things you’ll see that are not presets of the game. Clicking play will play 21 frames of the screen with an off-key version of Lacrimosa by Mozart playing on piano in the background. The screen will then spiral wipe to the actor Bongo in front of the black background for 13 frames. Then, his skin appears to melt off quite graphically, followed by subsequent layers of muscle, tissue and even organs, until it reaches the skeleton. This skeleton, unlike the default S’kelly, looks eerily… well…
…like it belongs to Bongo.
The shape, lines, and even proportions, are fitted to Bongo’s unique build. The music gradually fades, replaced with a crescendo of tortured screams. The skeleton then opens its mouth and says one of the preset lines:
“Those bullies won’t bother me now!”
While this IS a line attributed to Bongo, the line is distorted to sound deep and very demonic.
The final thing you see is a text in front of one of the basic backgrounds from the Nickelodeon edition of 3D Movie Maker. The front is hard to read, not only because the color almost completely blends in with the background but also because it’s in a strange font. When translated, it reads:
Let all those who see this film beware! Whosoever seeks to make it their own shall suffer a fate worse than death.”
I had heard about a member of the 3DMM community who did try to modify the movie, so I found out where he lived to ask him about it. When I got there, the lawn looked like it hadn’t been mowed for days, and there were several days' worth of mail & papers present. I knocked on the door, but no one answered.
I looked in a nearby window and saw that most of the house was covered in blood, urine, feces, and various entrails. I opened the door only to have the severed torso of the person I was seeking fall towards me. His skin was gone, as were his legs & hips, he was covered in blood, and I thought he was dead.
Until he grabbed my ankle and gasped:
“Why… why won’t he let me die?”
“Who,” I asked.
“E… Edgar…”
I called 911 immediately. The doctors made a startling discovery when they examined him: A piece of his brain was missing. According to some psychologists, this part of the brain…
…alerts the body when it dies.
As to the identity of Edgar, according to my research, he was apparently a programmer for Microsoft working on Project Socrates. He was fired for making horrifically graphic movies and later committed suicide. His suicide note read: “You’ll regret this.”
As for the process of Project Caligula, I also managed to find it in my research. Apparently, files on certain Microsoft computers would be labeled as “access.” These are the steps to… well… access the movie. News reports I found report a spike in disappearances the exact time of the release of the full version of Microsoft 3D Movie Maker. The computers for all of these victims, we’re all found to have the “access" file on them… …and listed as Read.
As I finished up my research, I received an email with the sender listed as “Edgar,” a file attached labeled…
access

So I (41F) starred talking to Ableist Andy (33M) on Hinge. He was younger than anybody I had ever matched with, but we had a lot in common, and I found that I wasn't bothered by the age difference.
We exchange phone numbers. Yay.
I reveal that I am permanently disabled due to cognitive issues from Bipolar disorder, and he says that's not a problem, all it good. We even talked about how I'd like to turn my Service Dog volunteer gig into a business - I was clearly remaining active despite my brain acting up.
We decide to meet and even pick a day. We are clearly still getting to know each other, and I have not disclosed much aside from having a diagnosis of BP1. I prefer to keep it simple until I've actually met someone because life is messy.
On Friday, he tells me work will be crazy the next day - cool, I tell him to have a great day, and I'll catch up with him on Sunday. On Sunday evening, I say hey hope he had a good weekend." On Monday, a good morning pic and ask if he'd like to ser a ball game on the agreed upon day - we had already discussed how it would be a fun first date idea. That night I told him that if he wasn't interested, just let me know, because we had been chatting a little bit every day and it was radio silence for 3 days. I get it. Dating apps are unreliable, and I just would appreciate it if he let me know now. I was a little curt because I'm so over the current dating culture of ghosting but far from rude.
He comes back telling me he doesn't have unlimited free time, like I (allegedly) do and that he's been working his ass off. And then...
"And another thing, too. I'll let you in on a little secret. I was diagnosed with Bipolar I when I was 24...I still take medication every night for it, as well as with my anxiety issues.
"But I still work my ass off too and didn't give up.
"Don't be a cop out, I strongly advise you to go to meetings and find a job that will work for you. There are jobs for everyone with mental illness.
"Even how down you think you are you can still go to work and make a living with a little help. To me you just gave up, and that kinda rubbed me the wrong way to be honest saying you're on disability at such a young age.
"It's not right. "
........
Ok? So why did he continue to chat with me, exchange numbers (he gave first), want to meet me (he brought it up) if one of the very first conversions we had "rubbed him the wrong way"?
Also - you can have a single manic episode and be BP1, or you can have repeated mania and multiple hospitalizations and long-term cognition issues with the Very Same diagnosis. So great - we share a label, not a history.
And I am so irked by the "get a job" thing - we talked about how I want to start a business that offers education to students, employees, employers, etc about the laws & ethics surrounding service dogs. It's a huge passion of mine, and I currently do it on a volunteer basis in classrooms.
I fought for years against doctor recommendation re: disability. I had to undergo an extensive psychological test as part of the decision making process - getting disability for a mental disorder is a major hurdle, they don't just give it to you because you have a diagnosis.
Just a vent. I'm not looking for advice. I've actually decided that I'm happier without the dating apps and the pressure of it all. 🙃
But if you have mental health concerns , be safe and remember that you know your needs better than a virtual stranger with limited details.

Long, but comprehensive & caring.
Helping a veteran friend who’s like my Auntie unfuck her house for a few weeks now, so she can finally move away from the heat of AZ (that’s bad for her health), and I’m almost done! The end of the miscellaneous boxes is almost near!
Here’s the circumstances & how I approached them:

• house full of boxes and furniture in complete disarray because they quickly packed and moved everything out of the way to pull out the floors, and have all the walls painted to sell the house
  
• some boxes logically filled with like things of all kitchen stuff, or family photos; but some boxes are complete random wtf family heirlooms with kitchen and office and literal junk (packed by auntie’s friend who means well, and has helped tremendously since auntie isn’t able, but she isn’t the most organized person, and had limited time before construction, so she did the best she could and is totally forgiven)
  
• boxes from when auntie lived in lots of fun different places around the world (active military & after), boxes from her late mother, and her late husband, and sister, and the old lady who lived here before.
  
• organizing is my best skill, which I was a little sad about when I was younger because it’s not an exciting skill like singing or astrophysics, but I’ve learned different fun uses of my organization, like producing films, and event planning; and I’m always happy to help with a worthy mission; plus I’ve never been to this part of the country before, so I thought of it as a fun adventure of organizing a whole house in a far off mysterious land.
  

Here’s how I unfucked it all:
First things first, clear out one corner or closet, or already mostly empty space in one room to make your special keepers spot. Preferably a room or closet close to where you’ll load / move from, but out of sight, so potential buyers of the “for sale” items don’t see / want / be obnoxious about things that are not for sale, because they are special keepers. Maybe it starts with a small closet or corner, and as you get through more of the house it moves to larger spot, don’t fret about moving the keepers spot more than once, just be happy that it’s all sorted & ready to go.
Next clean out a spot that’s easily accessible for guests to make the “for sale” spot, I designated the garage, and cleaned off the good keep metal shelves that were in different spots of the house to put down the one wall of the garage instead, to put all the garage sale stuff on, and moved all the keep or miscellaneous stuff out of the garage to sort later. You don’t have to go this far yet of moving all non-sale out yet, or moving shelves, that’s just what I was able to do with the space and things I was given. If all you can do for now is make a lil 4x4 spot designated “for sale” boxes, start there and that’s still a huge win to know that it has a spot. Don’t fret! You’ll get there!
The next step is the hardest, but you’ll feel so much better when it’s done. Trash, Laundry, and Dishes. Apologies to your power bill, water bill, and garbage professionals, but you just gotta keep those appliances (hoping you have my favorite invention ever: a dishwasher) running until it’s all done; because it HAS to be washed before getting packed or sold/donated, and it makes a world of difference to not have those 3 things all over the house as you begin to sort more fun things like collectibles or something you love.
As you go through each room clean up & take pics of the big ticket or larger for sale furniture items to put online. Those items go to the sale spot in the house & immediately listed for sale online to get a head start on getting things out of there to make more room, and everything else gets sorted into categories.
To make sorting into categories easier, put boxes around a big table or comfy chair for things of common categories like “keep sewing” or “keep office supplies” or “keep kitchen” or “sale” etc. so when you do get a super random box of everything, it’s easier to sort into the nearby categories. Some keeper delicate things will need to be repacked later before you tape the boxes closed, but at least you know they’re all keepers of a certain type. & Have a big garbage nearby and extra (preferably crappy non-shippable) boxes to put the garage sale stuff in. & I like to sharpie marker the inside of the box flaps of the top so it’s easier for everyone to see what’s in it.
Also recommend sorting everything by general categories before sorting keep / sell / donate. Example: get ALL the shoes together before you sort which ones are to keep, so you know you keep enough formal or casual or which colors or whatever. Same applies to kitchen, and crafts, and everything else like the 5 vacuums. So yes, generally sort into types before you sort what’s to keep, UNLESS you have an emotional reaction to something in one way or the other love/hate, and then immediately put that item in keep or trash.
& yeah it’ll be emotional!!!! She keeps thanking me for helping because I’m impartial to the emotional attachments to the things, and I keep asking her if it’s worth the truck space?, and could we thrift a similar one where she’s moving?, or is it sentimental?, and it’s helping her to let go of a lot of things, or as she puts it “give it’s a lil kiss and thank it for its time and memories before it finds a new home”. And also there’s a lot of emotions of things that she hasn’t seen in years, like her mom’s photo albums, or a painting by Koko the Gorilla that she hasn’t seen in years and thought was lost, nope, I found it in a cupboard in the garage behind a box. I can’t blame her for crying when she saw it again. It was a lot of emotions of knowing that it’s not lost forever, and WTF?! why was it in the garage when I last saw it in the dining room where I was gonna hang it? So yeah, I try to space out emotional boxes for her to sort because I know they need a lil extra time, love, and an easy one like fun shoes or something happy to lighten the mood after, or a break.
& breaks are great! Take them. Play an app game or watch silly videos for 30min & chill before you go back to your brain trying to organize everything & moving around furniture and boxes, your brain and back and knees will thank you for the time out.
If you’re getting a moving van / cube / car topper, measure out a spot somewhere of that square footage & start a pile there to see how much you’re actually moving so you can easily see if it’s too much. & I recommend labeling all the keep boxes color coded rainbow heavy (books) purple at the bottom and red (fragile / do not smush) for the top. Crayons on all the corners, purple at the bottom & work your color way up the rainbow to red at the top corners of the boxes so you don’t smush something important, and it’s easy to load.
Sell big furniture & collectibles online. Facebook marketplace local for furniture and big stuff, but collectibles to a trusted source elsewhere depending on the niche, or maybe eBay and offer shipping to get more money, which might take lots of time.
Garage sale. Don’t expect much. Everyone is downsizing so what it would have got at a similar sale 10-20 years ago is not what it’ll sell for today. Honestly consider anything sold at a garage sale as a bonus extra, and whatever doesn’t sell after two weeks should get donated, or listed for $1-5 online so someone gets a deal & they’ll actually use it. So don’t stress too much about dragging everything outside; keep it simple and accessible, and advertise free on Facebook local sell groups and craigslist.
When you get overwhelmed, which will totally happen when going through a whole house, stop and take a look at the two clean corners of keepers and sale stuff, and how much bigger they’re getting, and be happy with the progress, and know that the rest can get they way too if you just keep moving.
& speaking of keep moving, this past month we’ve had the fun background noise of fun new albums playing in the garage, and Star Trek Deep Space 9 rewatch on the tv in the house, since it’s our comfort show that we don’t have to pay attention to since we’ve seen it so many times, and is fun to chat about to lighten the mood of the frustration of the misc boxes of: why is the huge heavy mortar and pestle in a box of electronics?!? Helps to laugh it off, or bust out singing like you’re in a musical. Being pissed about it is only going to ruin part of your day, and laughing it off of belting out a musical which makes you laugh, it’s a great peaceful release that is scientifically proven to make most brains happier.
Hopefully a little of this helped you find a way to approach your unique situation.
Best of luck to you all, and if you need a second opinion or more specific organizing advice, message me, I’m happy to help.
If you’ve read this far, Digital Hugs from the one and only - Liz Copic
Edit to add: yes I have my friend’s permission to post all this, even the emotional stuff, and she knows that I post as real me Liz Copic, and she doesn’t care. No Regrets for honesty. Qowat Milat Star Trek style.

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very

I didn’t expect my comment (https://www.reddit.com/aspergers/s/YWcWG02LIO) to get so much traction, and it seems like I am seeing multiple posts about dating apps lately.
I put it on the shelf 2 years ago because I felt like I had met the one (I did), and so because I was no longer in the game, I lost the motivation to continue it. Up to that point dating had become so frustrating I was going to build my own site in hopes that people would join and bring some sanity back to dating. At the time I had thought about making it disability centric, but decided on general public, but no swiping, you actually search what you want for and can find other people by hashtags. The other thing would be a merit system, if you’re found guilty of ghosting people or sending unsolicited dick pics, your score is gonna go down really quick.
But I think I am going make the emphasis neurodivergence, and have it catered towards that. So brain dump on me, what kind of stuff do you wish a dating app had? Would you want labels describing your neurodivergence, or maybe we just introduce hashtags and let it go wild?
Disclaimer 1: for what it’s worth at this point I am only self diagnosed, but I am partly through a diagnosis. But I have done a ton of reading, revealing my suspicion to others on the spectrum in my circle, only to find out they already though I knew this about myself (one friend’s word to me asking if they ever thought I was on the spectrum was “absolutely”.)
Disclaimer 2: I’m probably suffering from burnt out at the moment. At the end of the work day after fighting executive dysfunction, I have zero motivation to look at more code. All my side projects have been shelved 😭. But if this actually gets traction maybe this will motivate me.
Also if anyone knows React.js and wants to join, let’s build this together.

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow Let's shake it up a little. Barry Breakfast is ready Ooming Hang on a second. Hello Barry Adam Oan you believe this is happening I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma I got a thing going here. You got lint on your fuzz. Ow That's me Wave to us We'll be in row 118,000. Bye Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house Hey, Adam. Hey, Barry. Is that fuzz gel A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. Hi, Barry. Artie, growing a mustache Looks good. Hear about Frankie Yeah. You going to the funeral No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. Well, Adam, today we are men. We are Beemen. Amen Hallelujah Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries Will we pick ourjob today I heard it's just orientation. Heads up Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. Wonder what it'll be like A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our topsecret formula is automatically colorcorrected, scentadjusted and bubblecontoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey That girl was hot. She's my cousin She is Yes, we're all cousins. Right. You're right. At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stresstesting a new helmet technology. What do you think he makes Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. What does that do Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life I didn't know that. What's the difference You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death We'll sure try. Wow That blew my mind "What's the difference" How can you say that One job forever That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that Why would you question anything We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here Like what Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. Hey, those are Pollen Jocks Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. Hey, Jocks Hi, Jocks You guys did great You're monsters You're sky freaks I love it I love it I wonder where they were. I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies Aren't they our cousins too Distant. Distant. Look at these two. Oouple of Hive Harrys. Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me Oh, my I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. Six miles, huh Barry A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. Maybe I am. You are not We're going 0900 at JGate. What do you think, buzzyboy Are you bee enough I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in Well, there's a lot of choices. But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey Barry, you are so funny sometimes. I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer You're gonna be a stirrer No one's listening to me Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo Let's open some honey and celebrate Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg" I'm so proud. We're starting work today Today's the day. Oome on All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... Is it still available Hang on. Two left One of them's yours Oongratulations Step to the side. What'd you get Picking crud out. Stellar Wow Oouple of newbies Yes, sir Our first day We are ready Make your choice. You want to go first No, you go. Oh, my. What's available Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. Any chance of getting the Krelman Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened A bee died. Makes an opening. See He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life Oh, this is so hard Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry Barry All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you Where are you I'm going out. Out Out where Out there. Oh, no I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die You're crazy Hello Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. Look at that. Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really Feeling lucky, are you Sign here, here. Just initial that. Thank you. OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada That's awful. And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans All right, launch positions Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz Black and yellow Hello You ready for this, hot shot Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. Antennae, check. Nectar pack, check. Wings, check. Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out Pound those petunias, you striped stemsuckers All of you, drain those flowers Wow I'm out I can't believe I'm out So blue. I feel so fast and free Box kite Wow Flowers This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector Ever see pollination up close No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again You're reporting a moving flower Affirmative. That was on the line This is the coolest. What is it I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemicaly. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees Oandybrain, get off there Problem Guys This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie Ooming in at you like a missile Help me I don't think these are flowers. Should we tell him I think he knows. What is this Match point You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it Yowser Gross. There's a bee in the car Do something I'm driving Hi, bee. He's back here He's going to sting me Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze He blinked Spray him, Granny What are you doing Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday Mayday Bee going down Ken, could you close the window please Ken, could you close the window please Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a foldout brochure. You see Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time This time This... Drapes That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my topten favorite movies. What's number one Star Wars Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait Stop Bee Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait Don't kill him You know I'm allergic to them This thing could kill me Why does his life have less value than yours Why does his life have any less value than mine Is that your statement I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. Vanessa, next week Yogurt night Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. You could put carob chips on there. Bye. Supposed to be less calories. Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it "You like jazz" No, that's no good. Here she comes Speak, you fool Hi I'm sorry. You're talking. Yes, I know. You're talking I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. I'm talking with a bee. Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. Wait How did you learn to do that What The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. That's very funny. Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something Like what I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. It's just coffee. I hate to impose. Don't be ridiculous Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake I shouldn't. Have some. No, I can't. Oome on I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. Where These stripes don't help. You look great I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon" Is that a bee joke That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry About work I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. You do Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. Really My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it You're in Sheep Meadow Yes I'm right off the Turtle Pond No way I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. Why do girls put rings on their toes Why not It's like putting a hat on your knee. Maybe I'll try that. You all right, ma'am Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you... Oan I take a piece of this with me Sure Here, have a crumb. Thanks Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. Sounds amazing. It was amazing It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans I can't believe you were with humans Giant, scary humans What were they like Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. Do they try and kill you, like on TV Some of them. But some of them don't. How'd you get back Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. Well... Well Well, I met someone. You did Was she Beeish A wasp Your parents will kill you No, no, no, not a wasp. Spider I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. Her name's Vanessa. Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist Oh, no You're dating a human florist We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M80s Oneeighth a stick of dynamite She saved my life And she understands me. This is over Eat this. This is not over What was that They call it a crumb. It was so stingin' stripey And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat You know what a Oinnabon is No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down ...really hot Listen to me We are not them We're us. There's us and there's them Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee Thinking bee. Thinking bee. Thinking bee Thinking bee Thinking bee Thinking bee There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry I gotta start thinking bee How much longer will this go on It's been three days Why aren't you working I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life You have no life You have no job. You're barely a bee Would it kill you to make a little honey Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him Barry, I'm talking to you You coming Got everything All set Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this Vanessa We're still here. I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling Then why yell at me Because you don't listen I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. Where are you going I'm meeting a friend. A girl Is this why you can't decide Bye. I just hope she's Beeish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV That's insane You don't have that We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness Are you OK Yeah. What is wrong with you It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep What was that A Pic 'N' Save circular Yeah, it was. How did you know It felt like about 10 pages. Seventyfive is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this How did this get here Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select Is he that actor I never heard of him. Why is this here For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own Well, yes. How do you get it Bees make it. I know who makes it And it's hard to make it There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing It's organic. It's ourganic It's just honey, Barry. Just what Bees don't know about this This is stealing A lot of stealing You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals This is all we have And it's on sale I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this Hey, Hector. You almost done Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy I knew I heard something. So you can talk I can talk. And now you'll start talking Where you getting the sweet stuff Who's your supplier I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees You're too late It's ours now You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio Where is the honey coming from Tell me where Honey Farms It comes from Honey Farms Orazy person What horrible thing has happened here These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere Just keep still. What You're not dead Do I look dead They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off I'm going to Tacoma. And you He really is dead. All right. Uhoh What is that Oh, no A wiper Triple blade Triple blade Jump on It's your only chance, bee Why does everything have to be so doggone clean How much do you people need to see Open your eyes Stick your head out the window From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs Bee Moose blood guy You hear something Like what Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. Bees hang tight. We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. What if you get in trouble You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me Mooseblood's about to leave the building So long, bee Hey, guys Mooseblood I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads Pinhead. Oheck out the new smoker. Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000 Smoker Ninety puffs a minute, semiautomatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money" Oh, my What's going on Are you OK Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen That's a man in women's clothes That's a drag queen What is this Oh, no There's hundreds of them Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale This is worse than anything bears have done I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this He's been talking to humans. What Talking to humans He has a human girlfriend. And they make out Make out Barry We do not. You wish you could. Whose side are you on The bees I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever Even if it's true, what can one bee do Sting them where it really hurts. In the face The eye That would hurt. No. Up the nose That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only fullhour action news source. No more bee beards With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tricounty bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this" Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus Bee Gandhi Bejesus Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke I'm not gonna take advantage of that Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. Is that that same bee Yes, it is I'm helping him sue the human race. Hello. Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night Byebye. Why is yogurt night so difficult You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. Frosting... How many sugars Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. Oh, those just get me psychotic Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. I guess. You sure you want to go through with it Am I sure When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry It's pretty big, isn't it I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billiondollar multinational food companies have good lawyers Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. What's the matter I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this All rise The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsyturvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches Talking bee How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motionpicturecapture Hollywood wizardry They could be using laser beams Robotics Ventriloquism Oloning For all we know, he could be on steroids Mr. Benson Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any beefreeers, do you No. I couldn't hear you. No. No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, BuildABear. You mean like this Bears kill bees How'd you like his head crashing through your living room Biting into your couch Spitting out your throw pillows OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. Where have I heard it before I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a pranceabout stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner That's not his real name You idiots Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir Watch it, Benson I could blow right now This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home Order in this court You're all thinking it Order Order, I say Say it Mr. Liotta, please sit down I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team Well, hello. Ken Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. What's that Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine Funny, I just can't seem to recall that I think something stinks in here I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames Not as much. Water bug Not taking sides Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat This is pathetic I've got issues Well, well, well, a royal flush You're bluffing. Am I Surf's up, dude Poo water That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings Kenneth What are you doing You know, I don't even like honey I don't eat it We need to talk He's just a little bee And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time Long time What are you talking about Are there other bugs in your life No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them Fine Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugarfree, artificial sweeteners made by man I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste I like it I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. You got the tweezers Are you allergic Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman We're friends. Good friends Yes. How good Do you live together Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children Yeah, but... So those aren't your real parents Oh, Barry... Yes, they are Hold me back You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson He's denouncing bees Don't y'all date your cousins Objection I'm going to pincushion this guy Adam, don't It's what he wants Oh, I'm hit Oh, lordy, I am hit Order Order The venom The venom is coursing through my veins I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction You see You can't treat them like equals They're striped savages Stinging's the only thing they know It's their way Adam, stay with me. I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks I will have order in this court. Order Order, please The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. Hey, buddy. Hey. Is there much pain Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy All right. You think it was all a trap Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window Why The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke But some bees are smoking. That's it That's our case It is It's not over Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes Yes, Your Honor Where is the rest of your team Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't We have a terrific case. Where is your proof Where is the evidence Show me the smoking gun Hold it, Your Honor You want a smoking gun Here is your smoking gun. What is that It's a bee smoker What, this This harmless little contraption This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non" Is this what nature intended for us To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and manmade wooden slat work camps Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man What are we gonna do He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees Free the bees Free the bees Free the bees Free the bees Free the bees The court finds in favor of the bees Vanessa, we won I knew you could do it Highfive Sorry. I'm OK You know what this means All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. What if Montgomery's right What do you mean We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, badbreath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate beenegative nicknames... But it's just a pranceabout stage name ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and ladeeda human teatime snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys Hold it right there Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming I think we need to shut down Shut down We've never shut down. Shut down honey production Stop making honey Turn your key, sir What do we do now Oannonball We're shutting honey production Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah What's going on Where is everybody Are they out celebrating They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey Who wouldn't It's the greatest thing in the world I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you What did you want to show me This. What happened here That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it No. And whose fault do you think that is You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact How do we do it I'll sting you, you step on me. (...)

Keep checking this thread as I'll edit as it goes along
First up
Rebecca Smith - Kraft services. Food lady. She's staying at the Inn at Santa Fe with Hannah. They were acquaintances, not friends. On Oct 21, 2021 she went to Hannah's room because "Kort and the set steward" did not want to leave Hannah alone. When she left, Hannah asked if she could hold something for her, she said yes, and she placed something in her hand as someone knocked. It was a "clear ziplock baggie, with another green ziplock, with white powder in the inner bag. The amount was equivalent to 4-5 sugar packets. Rebecca is a recovering addict and in her "professional opinion as a previous cokehead, she said it was coke. Rebecca threw it in trashcan and was very offended that Hannah gave it to her.Hannah texted her several times later saying, "I want my stuff back!"Rebecca did not tell law enforcement cuz she didn't want to be involved.
In Sept. 2023, is when prosecutor texted Rebecca to ask questions about the above.
Defense steps up now for questioning
Rebecca could see she was visibly distraught, which is why she was staying with her. She only stayed a bit, even tho she was distraught. Defense asks her, didn't hannah go to your room that night?? Rebecca says NOPE.Rebecca HAS seen coke in last 20 years, but has not used it. She can't recall if she said it was coke, or meth during previous testimony. Defense gets her to admit it could be ANY white powder, she can't know for certain what was in bag. It was never tested, never provided to LE.
Rebecca says she threw it out before she got to end of hallway. maybe 20-25 feet. Here, she admits that she was holding baggie down at her side because she is walking past "men in uniform" doesn't admit they are police. Rebecca's story falls apart a bit because now previous testimony has her saying she kept it because she didn't want to do anything in front of POLICE. Now, she's saying she can't remember if it was police. Defense gets her to admit that her "look" at the supposed coke was less than 5 seconds.This cross was mainly to get her to admit she didn't KNOW FOR SURE what was in bag.
Defense catches her by saying, didn't the text actually say, "I want my THINGS back" it did not say "stuff". Aren't THINGS more than 1 item? Isn't "stuff" and "things" quite different (imo, "stuff" is a drug slang...not things. Hannah's text said "things"
Prosecutor comes back for redirect:
What were you and Hannah talking about when you were hanging out in her room? Did she express any concern about Halyna?
No. She said she was concerned about her career and prosecution because someone was shot.
Defense comes back and says, you were the one that told her Halyna had passed?
Yes.
She's dismissed
There's a segment with a Courttv person, "Julie" who is going over Dave Hall's testimony. She says that during Alec and Hannah's police interview, BOTH say that Dave Hall's was the one who handed gun to Alec. Then, Friday...Dave, who has a deal, completHely changes his testimony and says that Hannah handed gun to Alec. She calls this a pants on fire liars. Hannah and Alec agree. Halls says he didn't. She then talks about Sarah tampering with evidence by throwing it away and immediately calling Seth Kenney, the bullet provider, WHY??? She calls it shady. There are Shady, shady things going on and Hannah appears to be the scapegoat.Seth Kenney is taking the stand TODAY.
Seth Kenney is on stand. CourtTV picked this up after it started...
Prosecutor is going over texts. Seth doesn't have his glasses, he can't see it? Jesus. He hems haws. Can't see. He's supposed to be talking about texts between him and Hannah.
Hannah texts that she can't find any of the dummies from TOE (The old way) He says they're in the belt. He's laughing, he can't see. Double Jesus.
He tells her that she's no longer under wing of dad and if something gets lost or damaged, she has to report. Hannah responds that you never mentioned this, I definitely lost 50 rounds during an action scene, so I have to round these up tomorrow and count them.
He says yep
Hannah texts, you both just send me out to do these things, and don't teach me, shame on both of you...Seth smirks.
He texts back, "You're a naughty child, I'll let papa handle this one."
Hannah- So what if I need more? You guys frickin blow.
Prosecutor - So was it your impression Hannah was bringing ammo that was already loaded into gun belts.
Absolutely, we were counting on it.
Whaddaya mean?
Because everything else from PDQ was slated for 1883. In fact, some wasn't even manufacted yet, so there was just no inventory. So the only way they were going to have ammo for Rust was to reach out to other suppliers, and they needed them right away. Billy --- Court TV breaks away
Talking heads say they think he's doing okay. The direct is going to be easy. Cross tho is a different matter. They note that Hannah is really upset that no one has taught her these things.
Back from break and they come in mid-sentence
"as much as I wanted to be there to facilitate, to answer questions that come up. "
Did you provide firearms?
Yes, approx. 30
Where were they being stored?
On the prop truck, in the safe
Did you provide Pietta 45?
Yes. I got those from Peitta, they supplied thru importer. I purchased them specifically for RUST, Baldwins gun was BRAND NEW. So were 11 of the 12 rented. All brand new.
Did you find out about Halyna
Yes, I missed a call from Sarah...she sent me a text all caps EMERGENCY, so I called her back.
Did you tell Sarah to do anything with the remaining rounds?
Absolutely not.
I tried several times to contact Hannah's dad, I texted. He returned my call.
Prosecutor says she's not going to ask what he said during that call? WTF?
When did you and Hannah have disagreement?
On Oct. 16. The subject matter related to accidental discharge of blank. (Prosecutor does not want to know what was said) That was the last time he spoke to her. It was clear she was emotional, she sent me a text that had a lot of swear words in it, and I felt she needed space and she needed to apologize to me.
Did you provide any live ammo to RUST or Sarah
NO. Nor did he ever possess any ammo that looked like the live rounds on RUST
When did you become aware YOU were being blamed?
I started to sense that there was an effort to redistribute blame. Side bar
Talking heads are saying that jury is going to look at accountability. Whose job was it to secure? If she made a mistake, that's a problem. Seth believes they are trying to blame him so he's biased against Hannah, so hes making himself the guy that did no wrong.
Back to court...
Did you see a morning news show where Mr. Boles and Reed were guests? And was there anything about their statements cause you to believe you were being blamed.
Yes,I saw show, it's difficult to answer. It started to feel...uh, knowing Reed, I know how much he loves Hannah, I felt that what was happening was to pin the live ammo on Rust, that somehow it came thru me. Boles and Reed both filed lawsuit against me within a couple days. At that point, it was clear I was being blamed. Lawsuit has been dismissed
CROSS IS COMING....I'm going to recap in paragraphs, instead of question and answer format as much as I can.
CROSS STARTED
Defense wants to walk thru 1883 set where Reed bought live ammo to set. Some were Starline brass. 50%. There were 3 types of bullet characteristics of reloads, can you explain them.
A round has 4 components. the bullet is the projectile. Phil had brought 45 colt r4eloads that were made up of one thirds...tip of projectile is shaped like a new crayon. A truncated cone looks like spaceship. Then, there is heavy grain...it looks like a lump of clay, kind of rounded. Even could have a flat point. They're roughly the same. So, there were 3 different profiles of"bullets" I grouped each profile into different boxes and told the prop masters that the semi wad cutters are not for rifles...those are best for pistols. They others for rifles. Somebody put a wad cutter in rifle and jammed it up.
Defense - In any event, there's 3 types of reloads. you have live training off-set on cowboy set for 1883. Nowhere near anything.
Seth - Right
BREAK (I don't know when they pick back up and not miss testimony, so you might have to watch for things not being shown)
Talking heads are recapping. Prosecutors want jury to think Hannah was high, on drugs, reckless in her job, etc. Defense got props for bringing up it was never tested, it could have been anything
​
CROSS BACK
After that set, you had retained the ammo can and the live rounds that Phil had brought?
No, i retained the reloads from Phil but the ammo can was at the firing range on texas. At that point I needed to know what we had and what variety because when I opened up the box, it was a jumble of 3 different bullet profiles. I had gotten from Joe Swanson, 10 boxes, flat, brand new, they had to be assembled, and I loaded the contents of the green ammo box that Dell had brought into those white boxes. Those white boxes went up to the firing line, as did the empty ammo box, which was now being used for the spent brass. After 1883 training camp ended, I retained some live ammo from that session
So, those remaining live rounds made their way back to PDQ props. You were back in Albeq. on or about Oct. 11th because you met with Sarah on the 12th. So you brought back dummy rounds from 1883 to give to Sarah, and those were 45 long colt dummy rounds.
Correct
How many on 1883?
5000
Out of those 5000, you brought some back for Sarah, and at some point, you can't tell the jury when, the live rounds came back to your place.
I've never been able to find out the date.
You said they were offloaded from your sprinter? van and got moved back to ALb. in the bathroom. Isn't it you that moved them back? You drove them back from 1883 but can't remember when?
No, I can ballpark within months or two. WTF? I haven't been able to narrow it down.
Did you try? Check trip receipts?
Yes...
There seems to be a glitch in the matrix because now were talking about stock and invoices. They are showing pics while he is talking about basically how shitty his inventory service is. he takes pics sometimes, it's a last minute type of business.
He's being shown documents/invoices to Rust to Sarah. On the back is sticker #FF for blank ammo and dummies, and the other doc is #EE invoice for guns, replicas, rubber guns, gun bags, socks. They are his invoices. He says they are the invoices from PDQ to Rust productions.
BREAK (Hannah has seemed very alert and attentive to Seth's testimony)
The FF# is invoice for blanks and dummies. Going over quantity and such. They're not showing the invoice.
I rented these to RUST but it's not everything. I can't recall exactly because I didn't invoice for them. WTF? He says guns, rounds, some just weren't invoiced.
What is a primed case?
An ammo case that has primer without gun powder. Typically, Swanson crimps the end. They're like a loud cap gun when they go off. Theatre, around kids and animals are good to use these.
Do you recall in your interview with police that you told her that you had given her a number of prime cases to Sarah and it will be interesting to see what color of primers they have?
No, I don't recall that (Big surprise) Defense offers to show him his statement. He looks at it (I guess now he can see, it's a RUST miracle)
Okay, this is interesting because it says PRIME, not PRIMED. I would never say PRIME. I don't recall the conversation nor know what I'm referring to in that conversation. He remembers NOTHING of this police statement....Hmmmmm. He only admits to Sarah having primed cases if it's on the invoice. I wouldn't be surprised if they got them?
Sir, don't you know whether you provided those to Sarah or not?
Nope..it was over 2 1/2 years ago. (wow. He is removing himself totally from being any part of the possibility that he gave her live rounds. Completely contradicting his police interview)
Defense is way annoyed that he has amnesia and is trying to get him to admit he remembers something! Seth only remembers there was a traumatic event. Defense says you discussed sarah having primed cases for FIVE pages on your statement. Seth has ZERO memory of that.
Do you remember calling Troy Teskey?
I've called him a number of times within the last 6-7 years.
(Seth is being unflappable. He's just flat out denying and not moving off that)
BREAK
Seth is explaining that when things are emotional, he needs a gateway to recollect. WTF? He's talking in circles. He's denying all his police interviews even tho there is a text message filled with expletives to Troy(they blank it out) that is * *************** a bunch of swear words...she didn't do her * job!
Defense: Some of your dummy rounds were starline brass with nickel primers, that were the same as what was on the set of RUST.
Yes.
Another Break...wtf?
Did you provide real, rubber guns and over 3k rounds of ammo?
idk what the total is...ive never totaled it out
Did Sarah come pick up rounds when they needed more?
Once the initial supply was given, i only remember 1 time, on Oct 12th, altho Sarah and Hannah came to me before RUST started and Hannah got her "leathers".
Something is going on now where they're talking about where these "leathers" went. Defense is trying to get him to admit they went to RUST. He says he doesn't know what Hannah did with them, he couldn't for sure say they ended up at RUST set.
Defense - You said dummie rounds that do not rattle are dangerous?
Dummy rounds that do not rattle are not dummy rounds to me
Okay then, If you're trying to distinguish between live and dummy...you want to hear the rattle.
Yes
You would not distribute or source a mixed bag so to speak. where there are dummies and live in same place or rounds that don't rattle.
That's right.
He wasn't aware that there were mixed?
Fighting go on now...seth will not admit really that the rattling signifies a completely dangerous situation. He's just jivving now. He claims he's not aware of all this shit
Now I want to talk about your interactions with Det. Hancock. When the case started, do you recall you had a meeting or call with her maybe the same day as the shooting incident?
No, no i don't. Didn't happen.
Do you recall after the shooting incident date, you called Det. Hancock over 40 times?
Sounds right.
Did she share with you materials from the investigation?
She showed me search warrant from prop truck.
Did you provide her with live rounds before the search
I did. Around 5-7. I volunteered those to her before search.
Were you aware they were going to search YOUR place too?
No..it was over a month after shooting, I wasn't surprised, but I didn't know. I OFFERED HER DNA BUT SHE DIDN"T TAKE IT.
Defense is surprised by this..
Did they take your fingerprints?
My fingerprints are in the system already because of having federal firearms license.
That wasn't my question, did they take your fingerprints?
BREAK
Who knows if he remembered...they come back in and are discussing how to use a reloader. Seth is going thru the process which isn't very easy to understand. Jury doesn't get this, I can tell you that, cuz with the speed he's talking, if you don't know about reloaders, your not going to understand this...grains of primer, 28 grains, pre 20th century, blah blah blah Court TV takes another BREAK
Defense asks if he remembers his interview where he said "If the camera crew wanted to send a surprise" Seth doesn't remember. Now he has to read the transcript.
So this reloading crap info is because he told Det. Hancock that you can alter a dummy to be live. He of course did not remember that until he was shown transcript
When you went to the set on the 27th, you had the code to the safe because Sarah texted it to you?
Yes. Sarah was an employee of PDQ for the RUST production
She called you right after the shooting and you spoke for 30-45 seconds and your testimony is that you did not tell her to throw rounds away?
Absolutely not.
But, then she did throw them away?
I learned about that MONTHS later
Did you know guns had been transported from cart or tell her to do that?
No.
Did you train Sarah?
Yes
Did you train her to throw away dummy rounds?
I don't recall, but they are rented so they wouldn't be thrown away
BREAK...
I'm out Pepinos...have kid to pick up.
Seth is not openly hostile, but you can tell he is hostile and covering his own ass. Period.
Picking back up....
Talking about argument between him and Hannah over text. Defense says you wanted her fired?
It wasn't up to me, he rambles on how he isn't listened to, it's up to RUST production and Sarah said she was a great armorer. He rambles and defense stops him and says answer question.
It's not that I wanted her fired, she was doing a horrible job with props.
Do you recall saying, "She was just being an idiot, I wanted Sarah to get rid of her."
He starts his rambling story telling injecting all his opinions, defense is pissed and says again, just answer the question. Do you remember stating that?
Oh yeah.
Do you also recall in your July 11th interview saying you were not going to work with her in the future, you wanted her fired.
He doesn't answer right away, you can see the hamsters running on their wheel in his brain, so instead of answering whether he remembers it, he begins his, "I'm a nice guy, there's mixed emotions" tour to distract. If I really wanted her fired, I could have gotten her fired. (He got away with not answering question)
Who was your contact on set"
Angela Nigem, Gabrielle Pickle, Roe Walters would have fired her. Sarah was willing to work and get the movie finished
LUNCH? BREAK
Redirect Recap
Prosecutor establishes he has 2 locations he keeps guns. We then have to go over what a "primed case" is. He loves to hear himself talk and he's comfortable rambling. She is trying to establish that a primed case is an empty brass shell casing that has no gun powder and no projectile, or no live primer.
Right
Can a primed case kill someone??
It can lead....yes it can, in a number of different ways.
How would that happen?
He talks about Brendan Lee case a primed case, initiating the primer was enough to project the bullet into the barrel which is called a squib load. In that case, they were supposed to be dummies, but they were not because the live primer makes them something different. Prosecutor points out that in Lee's case, there was also a projectile that was lodged into the barrel of the gun and a primed case by itself, still needs a projectile.
Yes
More talk about the primer shit.
They talk about the shipment of leathers that Hannah sent him from Montana. Belts and such, there were dummy rounds in there. Plus, another box contained weapons, and some of the weapons were loaded. This is concerning because you have to assume anything loaded into a weapon is live. So there were "sweaty palms" until he individually verified that each and every loaded round was in fact, a dummy.
They show a pic of all these rounds. He says they're semi-wad cutters with an oddball that has a projectile that I don't remember seeing. Truncated cone? maybe. Another pic of rounds..they are also semi-wad cutter. Another pic of possible primed case? Yes, they are spent cases but you have to assume that even tho it has been spent, you can't necessarily make a dummy round out of that. This is more incomprehensible stuff/convo that most jurors are not going to understand. Now he says he doesn't know what the pic is. smh. Casually tho? Spent casings.
Prosecution establishes that all the 45 long colt dummy rounds provided by him to set of RUST rattled. But he did provide others that did not rattle. Those were the .44 Henry copper plated rounds that look different than the 45 colt.
***This seems important.
Prosecutor - How do you know the 44 Henry's are dummies?
Well, they don't make them anymore.
How do you know they're dummies? If they don't rattle?
It's a problem, you assume that they're live then.
Is there a hole in the side? How do you KNOW IT'S A DUMMY?
Ya don't, that's a problem.
There's no hole in the side?
There's no hole in the side.
Prosecutor, I think, is surprised here...
P: Do you know if any of the 44 Henry's were used on the set?
No.
You don't know?
No, and to be clear, the .44 Henry's don't have a traditional primer. You cannot reload them. They're like a .22 rimfire (I'm getting bored now, I assume the jury is to)
Why did you call Det. Hancock so many times? (Over 40 times)
Just to aid in the investigation. It was routine for us to communicate.
Why didn't you want to work with Hannah in future?
The issue of loading a full load blank with a horse in the vicinity is a huge violation. Now they talk about Sarah called with issues about blank and animal. We go thru all this info about what types of blank loads are to be used around animals. You want to use the least amount of noise. No greater than 1/4 load. You don't use full load blanks because it's considered animal cruelty.
Good going Alec!! Add that to the list of shitty things you allowed to happen on YOUR SET.
Sidebar
Prosecution goes over the whole make a live round from a dummy round. YAWN. It's a hard process. Turning a live into a dummy is easier? It's less complicated. She's getting pissed with his ramblings. She wants him to say they need an inertia puller.
Did you train Sarah on how to handle a Single action army revolver
No.
They go over Joe Swanson pics of labels again. Boring!
More pics of boxes of dummies with JS in middle. They go thru them because he states he never had any dummies with JS in middle. None of the pics have JS in middle. There's approx. 15 pics that he has to go thru. ANother yawn fest
Now she goes over the fake guns he provided. He did not provide any fake long guns.
End of Redirect from Prosecutor
Defense steps up with follow up. The live into a dummy, they talk about equipment needed. (I'm not quite getting why this is a bone of contention) He says you need like 5 different pieces of equipment.
Was Sarah not permitted to use the revolvers, even without the training?
Well, a cold gun...that's a good question. I just don't remember training her cuz Hannah is armorer. There's no certification
END OF SETH. Thank God.
State is recalling Det Hancock (God...her lips are distracting!)
State wants her to tell how negligent use of firearm is charged.
SIDEBAR
This is long break...
Can't talk about the above...moving on.
They talk about her proficiency in firearms. She assessed the gun that Mr. Higg? brought in and was unable to check the barrel of the gun without removing the cylinder. You cannot fully see an unobstructed view of whole barrel. Half pull---obstructed. Full pull---obstructed. Then she took it at full cocked position and looked down barrel with light source, she would not comfortably say barrel was free of debris.
She knows Brian Norvelle who was interviewed for this case in front of defense attys. Norvelle is on video the guy that brings the prop cart from the set to cops and he is also the guy that reaches across the crime tape to take something from the cart. Defense did not ask Norvelle any questions. Mr. Boles has called and texted her over 40 times while prosecution has only talked to her a few.
idk what that was supposed to prove.
But defense now crosses establishing that he only called as Hannah's atty whereas Seth Kenney (also over 40 calls) is a potential SUSPECT in the case, right?
Snarkily she says, "According to who?"
Well, you're the investigator, did you ever look at him as a potential suspect?
Yeah, he was investigated.
She's annoyed.
So, that's what I'm asking you. Do you normally talk to potential suspects that many times in a case?
I don't think there is a limit as o how much we talk to them.
Defense establishes that her "barrel inspection" is basically meaningless because she's not an expert, nor is she an expert in the tools that are used to do such an inspection. Also, it was done inside and light is much different outside.
Correct.
He establishes that her "inspection" did not replicate the inspection done by expert.
I don't like her.
State calls Mike Primo
Primo is a forensics expert in digital multimedia....cell phones, recordings, videos, forensic tech, analysis of 3D scans, authenticating multimedia evidence, etc. They go thru his education and background along with professional memberships
He has a stache and goatee..ugh I don't like the goatees.
He was contacted initially to examine several digital images captured. His report was peer-reviewed.
First image is of bottoms of dummies or bullets. It is extremely blurry. They "fixed it up" and while it is still blurry, you can distinguish it a bit better. Not much, but a bit. These pics are compared. They weren't able to make it that much better because of a number of reasons. Blah, blah. Pics of 2 empty cylinders are much clearer. Talk about process of pixels, enlargements, blah blah. Also, they talk about how primer looks on end of bullet. It is like a darker silverish color. Dark. As opposed to no color, or a bright silver.
Now they're looking at a pic of Hannah, holding a gun, and in the bottom corner, there is a box (think of a container that lipsticks would be displayed in...where they are all standing up) with ammo. The bullets are wedged into this styrofoam piece so you can see the ends of all the ammo. Prosecutor had them zoom in on the itty bitty image of ammo and enhance. The bullets, all close together, you can now see that the bottoms of the bullets are different colors. On some, you can see a darker silver color, and on others, there appears to be no color, more just a goldish color. BUT while you can see a difference, it has not been verified that they are in fact, different.
Now, they're talking about videos he worked on where he took still frames from a video. 1st one is side view of Alec with Hannah standing in front of him. You can see Alec's head and a part of his upper body and hands, but Hannah is blocking the rest of him by where she is standing. It appears that her one hand is up near his shoulder, and the other is on his upper chest. Then, they play the video and it's Hannah removing his shoulder holster and handing it off to Sarah, who has come into frame. The bandolier is in Sarah's hands now and you can see ammo in it. There's other videos, with different angle of ammo in bandolier that they extracted still images of and enhanced.
Now, on the stills, you can see a difference in color on the bottoms of the bullets. Some seem bright silver, while others look just brassy or darker color. So, while you can SEE the difference, it was not verified as different (idk why that wasn't done)
Now, they have a still of the ammo where you can see the tops, or the projectile ends. These are NOTICEABLY different. The top 2 bullets are longer, bigger than the others and you can distinctly see the tip, which is rounded and dark silver tipped. The top 2 bullets are more cone shaped at the tip to me, as opposed to flat, or slightly rounded with a shorter tip of the others. Plus, you can SEE a difference at the bottoms of bullets as far as color goes.
The state RESTS...is that it for the state's case? idk?? Court is adjourned
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​
​

Author Expertise:
My first direct order from a seller + first review!
I stepped away from the Rep Game for a couple of years but spent HOURS studying RIPladies content back during COVID times. I loved the intrigue, but only had the guts to place a Tao Bao order using Base Tao.
I have mostly lurker-attained rep/luxe knowledge, and I have my expectations properly calibrated I hope! I’m getting a rep for a fraction of the auth price, from a seller and factory workers just trying to make a living ya’know? My goals are to 1. Not get scammed and 2. Get a rep that I can comfortably take out in public.
I took the plunge because the Sand color in the original puzzle design is discontinued and I don’t want to use an online reseller. I hear high-quality reps make it past the authenticators sometimes so…why not just buy a rep myself??
​
Disclosure:
Seller, Chloe, is aware I am writing a review. I did NOT receive anything in exchange for this review.
​
Seller Contact:

• Chloe via WhatsApp: +86 138 2332 1440

​
Price Paid for Item:

• Bag: $170.91 USD
• Shipping: $58.15 USD
• Paid using PayPal Friends & Family

​
Factory:

• Louyi aka Mango Factory

​
Photos:

• Factory Photos
• PSPs
• My Photos Goblin outfit mod shot (I’m 5’10”) Puzzle in different lightings Puzzle AFTER Leather Honey
• Auth: Harrod's Small Puzzle in Sand and Fashionphile Small Puzzle in Sand

​
Timeline:

• 2/2: Inquired with Chloe, and she sends factory pics. She informed me the factory is closed until the 18th for Lunar New Year, but I still place the order + pay.
• 2/17: Chloe sends PSPs. I GL
• 2/20: Chloe sends me tracking info; it doesn’t work using the site she links but it works on the FedEx site!
• 2/23: I received the bag. Crazy fast.

​
Quality of your rep from your factory:
First impression: “Holy Chaenel No. 4, Batman!”

• Loewe branded dust bag included
• POTENT sache inside the purse labeled “fragrance.” The scent that greeted my nostrils wasn’t exactly fufu per se…but more like strong, cheap perfume?? I set it outside for an hour to off gas and my husband remarked that the purse smelled “offensive.” Smell fully dissipated after a day. It now has a benign leather scent with only subtle notes of dollar store musk.
• Leather was a little dry to the touch initially. TREMENDOUS improvement after a generous coat of Leather Honey that absorbed over 24hrs. After conditioning and hanging on a felt hanger, the bag had an effortless slouch and was veryyy soft to the touch. See above pictures for before/after Leather Honey.

Closer look at construction: “Life was so much easier when I didn’t care about stitching”

• Photos comparing factory photos alongside PSPs
• Overall, the rep handbag is an honest reproduction to the factory photos. There were no glaring inconsistencies.
• The stitching is straight, double stitched where it’s supposed to be double-stitched, and the thread color matches the factory depiction. One stitching flaw I noticed: The rep has a rounded right corner on the back zipper stitching rather than the clean 90-degree stitch depicted in factory and auth photos. Zoom in on this pic: https://imgur.com/4kNcwNF
• When comparing my rep to auth photos online, the rep’s leathehardware color seem to align very well. Of note, I swear Loewe colors transform entirely depending on the lighting and viewing angle. It’s hard to definitively say my rep exactly matches the auth shade without an irl side-by-side. But honestly Loewe’s “chameleon” coloring may work in the rep’s favor since it’s inherently hard to pin down?
• The black edge glazing is overall very clean. There are 2 wobbly lines I noted; one on the front zipper pulls and one spot on the back upper pull on the upper part.
• Embossed Lx4 logo matches the factory depiction; rep placement is perfect. Depth matched factory (note: both factory and rep are deep compared to auth).
• Zippers are YKK branded and have the correct Loewe stamping. Zippers were rough to open/close but improved after I applied a beeswax blend to the zipper teeth (Doc Martens Wonder Basalm).
• The included strap has no issues–even stitching, hardware is correct and has a clean embossed Loewe detail on the strap adjustment part.
• Auth measurements (from Harrod’s): H16.5cm x W24cm x D10.5cm
• Rep measurements: H15.5cm x W23.5 x D9.5cm

​
Rep Satisfaction (required)
1:1 is the dream, and this bag is probably ~ 95% accurate… BUT the rep is frkin 94% off the auth price! My gambler brain says there might be better Puzzle reps out there, but this one is a solid choice.
Many reps have the too-deep Lx4 stamp issue so it may take a few tries to find a rep that has it perfect. Mango/Louyi Factory is well-known here when it comes to Loewe reps, and I can see why—this bag is hella nice. Especially after doctoring the bag with leather honey and wax on the zipper. There are some rumblings about Mango factory’s slight decline in quality now that they’re so popular, see this post.
If I bought this bag unbranded off Amazon for $170, I’d be stoked! BUT if you’re sensitive to smells, maybe just ask Chloe to take out the fragrance packet before shipping… I’ve worn this bag out a couple of times now and it looks so cute carried in the crook of my arm or on the longer strap over the shoulder!
​
Seller Satisfaction (required)
Chloe is very responsive, and she always messages me back almost immediately or within a couple of hours, at the most. Also, her turnaround speed is incredibly fast (see the order timeline above)!
Her pricing is competitive and even though her shipping seems a wee bit expensive, it is very fast.
​
The Wrap Up (required)
To be safe, I would avoid taking this bag into a Loewe store unless I was feeling particularly brave that day. But NO, I would NOT let a SA handle it due to the deep embossing, and they might notice the rounded stitching on the back zipper (even though all the other stitching is near perfect).
All in all, this is a good rep. Not a mind-blowing 1:1, but it’s 95% accurate for 94% off the price. Mathematically speaking, that makes it a good choice right? And I reached my two goals; didn’t get scammed and got a bag I took out in public!
Let me know in the comments what you think of the bag and my first review. QC me!
​
Thanks all, appreciate all the wisdom you so generously share. Cheers!
Edit:

• Bullet point about leather added—somehow got lost when copying/pasting from Google Docs!
  
• Also I think I spelled Luoyi wrong this entire review 😵‍💫 Will have to fix it in my next review as I have more Loewe on the way…
  

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Coming! Hang on a second. Hello? Barry? Adam? Can you believe this is happening? I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs, Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. You got lint on your fuzz. Ow! That's me! Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! Hey, Adam. Hey, Barry. Is that fuzz gel? A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around The Hive. You did come back different. Hi, Barry. Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. Hear about Frankie? Yeah. You going to the funeral? No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp under the circumstances. Well, Adam, today we are men. We are! Bee-men. Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive City graduating class of 9:15. That concludes our ceremonies And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick our job today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. Wonder what it'll be like? A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to The Hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! That girl was hot. She's my cousin! She is? Yes, we're all cousins. Right. You're right. At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. What do you think he makes? Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. What does that do? Catches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Can anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Check it out. Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside The Hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. Hey, Jocks! Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! I wonder where they were. I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside The Hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can't just decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. Couple of Hive Harrys. Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! Oh, my! I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. Six miles, huh? Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. Maybe I am. You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? Well, there's a lot of choices. But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! Barry, you are so funny sometimes. I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! You're gonna be a stirrer? No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. We're starting work today! Today's the day. Come on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... Is it still available? Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Congratulations! Step to the side. What'd you get? Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Couple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. You want to go first? No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. Any chance of getting the Krelman? Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? I'm going out. Out? Out where? Out there. Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. Look at that. Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. Thank you. OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! That's awful. And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. Antennae, check. Nectar pack, check. Wings, check. Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader, We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! Ever see pollination up close? No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Cool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow, Could be daisies, Don't we need those? Copy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Chemical-y. Careful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Candy-brain, get off there! Problem! Guys! This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Coming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. Should we tell him? I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! Do something! I'm driving! Hi, bee. He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Can't fly in rain. Can't fly in rain. Can't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Check out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him.It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. You could put carob chips on there. Bye. Supposed to be less calories. Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Come on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. You're talking. Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. I'm talking with a bee. Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. Wait! How did you learn to do that? What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. That's very funny. Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Can I... get you something? Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Coffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. It's just coffee. I hate to impose. Don't be ridiculous! Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? I shouldn't. Have some. No, I can't. Come on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. Where? These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for The Hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. You do? Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. Really? My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. Why do girls put rings on their toes? Why not? It's like putting a hat on your knee. Maybe I'll try that. You all right, ma'am? Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Can I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. Thanks! Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. Sounds amazing. It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. Do they try and kill you, like on TV? Some of them. But some of them don't. How'd you get back? Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. Well... Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! No, no, no, not a wasp. Spider? I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. Her name's Vanessa. Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside The Hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? They call it a crumb. It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! You know what a Cinnabon is? No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! Thinking bee. Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! We're still here. I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! Then why yell at me? Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. Where are you going? I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. What is wrong with you?! It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? cute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? Is he that actor? I never heard of him. Why is this here? For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? Well, yes. How do you get it? Bees make it. I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! It's organic. It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools,hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. You almost done? Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Crazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. And you? He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! What is that?! Oh, no! A wiper! Triple blade! Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Carl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! Bee! Moose blood guy!! You hear something? Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. Bees hang tight. We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. What if you get in trouble? You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! Hey, guys! Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. Check out the new smoker. Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. What? Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. You wish you could. Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! That would hurt. No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, The Hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Chung. Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, classy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from The Hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. Is that that same bee? Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. Hello. Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. Frosting... How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. Oh, those just get me psychotic! Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. What's the matter? I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Case number 4475, Superior Court of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Cloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Call your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? No. I couldn't hear you. No. No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. Where have I heard it before? I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! Order in this court! You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! Say it! Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. Ken! Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the right job. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little Mind Games. What's that? Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Chapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! You're bluffing. Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. You got the tweezers? Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. Good friends? Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? Yeah, but... So those aren't your real parents! Oh, Barry... Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? Objection! I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! Adam, stay with me. I can't feel my legs. What Angel of Mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed Turn Against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. Hey, buddy. Hey. Is there much pain? Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very

For those who love long stories, buckle up.
A few days ago, somewhat out of the blue, my best friend (26F) sent me (26M) a song from Spotify called ‘Home’ by Good Neighbours and said “🥺❤️thinking about ya”. The song came out only 6 days ago so I had never heard it before, but I had a feeling, based on the message and song title, that the lyrics would be interesting or meaningful in some way. Well, they were.
The background story:
We met as coworkers at a restaurant, and have been best friends for about 4 years now. We both had crushes on each other in the early days of our friendship after we met, but neither of us said anything or made a move. My reason is that she had a boyfriend, so I took that to mean she was unavailable and probably not interested. Looking back, I now know she wasn’t happy and was planning on ending things with him. If I had said something at the time, we likely would have dated.
When someone is in a relationship, I’m not the type to cross boundaries, so I took it hard for a while that I had feelings for her but she was taken. I definitely cried over it a few times, but I got over it enough to carry on with things and somehow maintain a pretty good friendship with her. I had actually taken her on somewhat of a “date” to a film festival shortly after meeting, but I found out she had a boyfriend a few days before. So I did some thinking and realized that she maybe took this as a platonic type of date, and I didn’t make a move. (I had much later found out that she didn’t tell her boyfriend about this date, which is a clear sign to me that it was a date. If it was platonic, then why not tell him?).
Fast forward to 6 months after we met, we were starting to become really good friends, and hung out fairly often. We hadn’t worked together in a few months, as it was early days of COVID and I was afraid to work with the public and wash other people’s dishes every day. Anyway, I met a girl on tinder around this time, and I fell hard and fast in the short time that we were messaging with each other (fine make fun of me i don’t even care!) A few days before my first in-person date with her, my best friend and I were hanging out and catching up. She asked if I was seeing anyone lately, and I shared how i had met someone on tinder and was absolutely crazy about her. (It’s kind of an important detail, but my memory is failing me. I think that somewhere around this time, best friend may have mentioned wanting/planning to end things with her current bf. But the phrasing and vibes were never so clear cut that I ever took this to mean ‘because I want to be with you’. Anyways — an important detail nonetheless. Sorry about my memory).
Later on in the hang, we were talking about crushes we used to have on people at work. I had said that I used to have a crush on this one coworker (purposely leaving her out as one of my big crushes). After laughing and talking about the one I did mention for a bit, i had to go to the bathroom. When I came back into the living room, i guess my best friend thought this would be the perfect time to yell (yes, yell) that she had a big crush on me when we worked together (not all that long ago). She shared it in a way that was kind of embellished and meant to be taken lightly, so we kind of laughed about it and quickly got off topic. After one of our tangents I suddenly yelled “Can we get back to the fact that you used to have a crush on me!!???”. We laughed more and talked about it a bit. Again, it was a pretty ‘light’ conversation and no big (or current) feelings were revealed by her. But I took the opportunity to share that there was definitely a period where I had a thing for her as well, so that she wouldn’t feel like she just laid this vulnerable thing out there for me to barely acknowledge. There was a small moment later in the hang where I felt like she was wanting to have a moment with me. Just by the way she was sitting and looking at me, but it was hard to tell.
One thing about me is that I’m REALLY bad at being able to distinguish between “this is not a moment” and “oh this is a MOMENT”. But hindsight is always so much more clear, and I do feel there was a small moment there. Looking back, I see this night as a time where I may have, potentially, absolutely stomped on her heart. Despite the fact that she was still in this relationship, I know she liked me, and I know she revealed her crush on me for a reason. She was probably realizing she was going to miss her shot, and for all I know she was prepared to come over that evening and start something up with me. My theory is that she panicked when I blindsided her with this new relationship, and literally blurted out the crush reveal to see if feelings were mutual, before it was too late. But my absolute cliff dive into a new relationship mixed with her awful timing meant that it was too late. I remember feeling a strong sense of “ughhh why are you telling me this NOW?!”. Emotionally, I had moved on. If there was ever an opportunity for us, this was that time, and I… / she…. / we missed it.
Another detail for extra context: Any time this chunk of time comes up in conversation, she has often made a point to slip into the conversation that she ‘wasn’t happy’ (in her relationship at the time). For example, we have jokingly taken turns expressing uncertainty about whether the ‘date’ we went on was really a date or not. Since I was the one who asked her, I think she has leaned on me to answer this question, but every time I have copped out by saying that I wasn’t sure either, because I knew she had a boyfriend at the time, to which she will then add ‘i wasn’t happy’. I have always taken this remark as “you should’ve made a move, dumbass”.
By the time she started making these comments, so much time had passed that I wrote it off as a bit of a loss, and something of the past. People really have to spell it out to me that they are interested, or at least be very physically touchy for me to clue in, which she was not. The ‘date’ in question was quite innocent and passive (our entire friendship is), and the fact of her having a boyfriend sat at the forefront of my mind the entire time. I simply viewed her as undatable, even though here she was, sitting next to me at the movies that I asked her out to.
About 6 months into my new relationship, best friend decided to finally end things with her boyfriend. As mentioned, she was not happy for a long time, but she struggled to rip the bandaid off. Always has. Shortly after ending it, she mentioned to me that her ex had asked “is it because of (my name)?”. It wasn’t. I was very invested in my new relationship at the time. I lived with my partner and, due to the high risk of best friend’s job during COVID, best friend and I did not see much of each other through most of 2020. So at this point the break up was certainly not ‘for’ or ‘because’ of me. But there were definitely a few things that made it clear that her ex had some jealousy towards me, and the fact that he asked that question speaks volumes to me.
I continued dating (and living with) my girlfriend for another few months before we finally broke up around the 8 month mark. I was devastated. I was not ready to move on and absolutely crushed by this loss, and on top of that I had to find a new place to live. I moved out, and struggled to cut ties with my ex. There was a period of little-to-no contact, but a month or two after the break up we began to weave back and forth into each other’s lives for that whole summer, while best friend casually dated around and had her first go at dating apps. Let’s just say she had a very *eventful* summer as far as situationships go. Our friendship continued as usual and we saw lots of each other. For the first time in our friendship we were both technically single, but there was no *moment* (i.e. the sudden urge to 'make the jump'). We just really enjoyed each other's time, and supported each other through our individual romantic situations. Meanwhile I started to slip back into a full-blown relationship with my ex, without the label (per her choice and my lack of dignity).
During this grey area of our dating lives and friendship, best friend and I had a two week period where things were more interesting than usual.
Event 1: I was dog-sitting for a family member 2 hours away from our city, and invited best friend to come for any length of time. I was in a quiet patch with my ex-gf and she was at the tail end of a bad situationship, so things were kind of up in the air for both of us. She drove to where I was staying, and during this visit we decided to go in the hot tub. I could tell she was checking me out when I got out to get something. So there were definitely vibes happening. A few minutes later, i complained of being sore in my neck and shoulders from lifting something the day prior, and she offered to rub my shoulders. That was definitely… nice. And I know you’re thinking ‘so you made a move, right???’. Well reader, I did not. Sorry to let you down. Things carried on as usual after that and she stayed the night in another room.
Event 2: The following week, we had our annual summer work party at my boss’ house on the lake. I was still working at the same restaurant, but best friend had left for a job in her field a few months ago. But all of my coworkers loved her, and our boss gave each of us a +1 for the party. Those in relationships brought their significant others, one of my single coworkers brought a friend, and I invited best friend. Yet another grey area date, as she was not only my +1, she was also an honorary member of the staff party (so idk, a little less romantic and ‘special’ of an invitation). At this party it really was hitting me how amazing I feel around my best friend, and how 'being with her' just makes so much sense. I feel so comfortable, 100% myself, 100% safe, and she’s just hilarious and a fucking blast. She had me cracking up the entire time, along with everyone else. For a moment in my mind, I had a birds eye view of us from the party and imagined how everyone else must see us. We absolutely pass as a couple. We are so complimentary and comfortable, and we clearly really enjoy each other's company. Later in the party, after dinner, the evening was setting in and a bunch of us were in the hot tub (yes, another hot tub event lol).
This was one of the first times my best friend had touched me in a way that is DEFINITELY more than platonic. I had somehow managed to even write off the massage as something that was potentially innocent and friendly (someone help me).
Anyway, we were sitting next to each other in the hot tub. I was in the water and she was sitting up on the ledge with her legs beside me. As we were in conversation with the others, I felt her hand start to graze through my hair. It went on for more than a few seconds, and I was NOT expecting it. I had a pretty strong reaction to it internally, it felt so good. Not just physically, but full-body feels. But I played it cool. Why didn’t I follow up on this, you ask? Well there was a window of opportunity later on at the party, but she then started talking about this girl at work (best friend is bi btw) who she was having this ongoing ‘thing’ /crush with and revealed that this girl kissed her completely out of the blue the other day. That threw me off big time. It probably shouldn’t have, but clearly I am very intimidated and in my head about making a move when other love interests are involved. I don’t know why the hell she decided to bring this up at that time; it completely ruined the moment for me and just left me with mixed signals.
Important note/context to the reader: I described the events above because they illustrate all of the clearest times in our friendship where I suspected there were romantic feelings involved. But I want you to keep in mind that apart from these few events, our friendship has been very non-eventful in terms of outwardly romantic or physical involvement. I genuinely don’t have much to share in that department, apart from her putting her arm around me at a concert or something casual like that. We have not had a lot of what may be described as ‘close calls’ or ‘moments of sudden passion’ like you see in the movies, where we’re clearly 1 second away from making out, or making super prolonged eye contact. Outside of these more ‘interesting’ events, honestly a very 'typical' friendship, though one that is extremely deep and meaningful. I’ve always been there for her, and, for the most part, she’s always been there for me. I honestly think the level of comfortability and ‘joking’ nature of our friendship is a huge reason why some of these more romantic moments are confusing to me, and possibly why they have been missed opportunities.
Fast forward to Christmas of this year:
She has now been living with her current boyfriend for 2 years. He kind of sucks. Not as a person but as a boyfriend. She objectively just deserves so much more, and that fact is really starting to sink in. She started realizing this a long time ago, but similar to her former relationship, she has struggled to end things, and she has let the relationship drag on far beyond the time where she is no longer happy or fulfilled in the relationship.
For entirely different reasons, this has been an extremely difficult year for me, and I more or less have two people to thank for keeping me above water the whole time — my therapist, and my best friend. This, coupled with the feelings that I clearly have for her, I decided to go all out for her Christmas gifts. I wrote her a sweet card (but not too sweet — again, trying to watch boundaries). I got her a necklace where the pendant is a symbol of her favourite band that is known only by fans. I also made her a homemade gift for which my artist grandfather helped me paint a lyrical reference to one of her favourite Taylor Swift songs and a really nice design on a piece of decorative wood to be hung up (p.s. my grandpa is REALLY good). I got her a few other things, too, that I knew she would absolutely love. She cried a little over the two gifts I described, and was ecstatic when she opened the others. I absolutely blew her away, and she basically said as much. After opening her third gift she basically had to take an emotional time out, and said "I'm fucked up!". So funny.. I recorded the whole thing and so glad I did. It’s nice looking back at how much pure joy I provided for like 40 minutes straight.
Fast forward to two weeks ago:
She came to visit me (I now live in a different city — long story. But we have been good to take turns visiting each other over the past year). We went out to dinner and had a long catch-up type conversation, where I was yet again informed that there is some jealously/suspicion on behalf of her current partner towards our friendship. Not enough to cause a massive fight (to my knowledge) but I know it has come up recently, and that he definitely had some unshared feelings towards the gifts I got her (probably because his were lame. He’s just not the type to get her something super thoughtful). Apart from the gifts, he basically has feelings about the fact that we tend to have very emotionally in-depth conversations (again, nothing crossing romantic lines). Best friend said that she replied something along the lines that I am a very important friend in her life and she doesn’t see it as necessary to ‘pull back’ in terms of our friendship or place restrictions around the kinds of conversations we can have. While discussing my being perceived as somewhat of a threat to their relationship (by bf), she apparently said that if i was a threat to the relationship that it would’ve happened already. I didn't know how to read this. Highly ambiguous imo.
Another thing that came out of this conversation — best friend said she probably would have had much less tolerance for her partner and left him a long time ago if I was not in her life, as she has relied on me to fulfill a lot of her emotional needs (i.e. seeking advice, sharing thoughts and feelings). I replied ‘so what you’re saying is i’ve been doing him a big favour’ in a joking tone, and she agreed. She said he fulfills very few of her needs and/or desires. Their relationship is what I can only describe as ‘grown man who made his girlfriend fill the role of his mom’. And she’s so fucking over it. She’s been over it for a long time, but especially now. She has said (quite matter-of-factly) in recent months that she knows they will not be together forever. And just at this recent visit she said she will likely break up with him before she leaves for school (which starts this fall). Although I sure as hell hope it’s sooner.
Fast forward to a few days ago (January 26, 2024):
So she sends me this song. Again, somewhat out of the blue, with the message “🥺❤️thinking about ya”.
These are the lyrics (though I highly recommend listening to the song as well, it adds a whole other layer):
[Verse 1]
It's a light relief from a bad habit
It's my mother's cookin' when I can't have it
It's the last train home from the day trippin'
It's the place I’ll go when I start slippin'
[Chorus]
Darling, won't you take me home?
Send me shivers somewhere I used to go
Wrap my name across your mouth
When I let my feelings down
Darling, won't you take me home?
Yeah, won't you take me
[Verse 2]
Tell me, does your mother know?
I still love you, head to toe,
Like the back of my car on a sunny day
You're the song on the radio I never play
You're the words in my soul that I wanna say, yeah, I wanna say
So won't you make me stay?
[Chorus]
Won't you take me home?
Send me shivers somewhere I used to go
Wrap my name across your mouth
When I let my feelings down
Darling, won't you take me home?
Yeah, won't you take me.
​
I had to sit with it for a while. I listened to it on repeat for about an hour, spiralling. The song itself is not a dead giveaway of anything, but she is the type to pay strong attention to lyrics, and the fact that she sent it directly in messages says something to me as well. She doesn’t do that very often. We do have a shared Spotify playlist and we love to share music with each other as we have very similar taste. You should see this playlist. I swear it is a highly curated musical recipe for 'hey you two, fall in love please'. I'm talking Hozier, Gregory Alan Isakov, TSwift, Caamp. These are some of our shared favourite artists.
In case it’s important for context, she followed up this message with several very casual replies to my previous messages she had not answered in a while (she’s terrible at replying), with one of these messages addressing me as ‘buddy’ (as we often do).
I am trying my damndest to not read into this to the point of no return, but I can’t help it. Based off of what I know from our history, the trajectory of her current relationship, and me being single, this song really struck a cord for me, and I'm struggling to see it any other way than her sending me a very direct and literal message that she sees me, at least in part, as home to her.
I also remembered/realized shortly after receiving the song that I had VERY recently sent her a song with pretty suggestive and very romantic lyrics (that I did not pay enough attention to before sending) and that also have an uncanny applicability to our relationship (the song is called 'Lady by the Sea'). With the song I sent the message 'song rec 😍".
Upon remembering this, reading the lyrics, and realizing the gravity of the message I have potentially conveyed to her, I feel like I may have opened the floodgates, and that she followed up on it with an equally emotionally vulnerable song, as I feel this one is. I waited a day before responding. I felt frozen.
Treading lightly, but still showing my emotion towards the song, I ended up replying to the message “got my heart all fucked up 🥲❤️”. I wanted to match the ambiguity and casual nature of her message, in case she didn’t send it with romantic intentions. I think we're both of the opinion that even if nothing romantic ever happened between us, we still deeply care for one another. So this song being sent in a platonic way is not something that would be weird for us.
So that’s it. I am begging you guys to knock some sense into me. Is she in love with me or am I reading WAY too into this? I know I need more evidence but I’m so scared of letting on too much. If feelings aren’t mutual, our friendship may never be the same. I can feel myself falling already, I've run several marathons in my head already. If I don't get answers soon, I know feelings will be hurt. What should I do?
TLDR: My best friend of 4 years sent me a song that lends deep meaning to our relationship and has led me to believe she has feelings for me. I have had feelings for her for a while now.
***UPDATE (January 27):
I sent her a run-of-the-mill snapchat video last night — something work related that referenced the organization she works for. This morning she responded with a snapchat of her face with text in response to the video I had sent, followed by another snapchat with text that read “I can’t take a normal pic for you”. She looked a bit shy/awkward in the picture? Idk. Yet another HIGHLY AMBIGUOUS thing that I have read far too deeply into. I don't know what she meant by that, but I took it as a flirty follow up and indicative of the fact that she doesn't know how to act around me due to recently shared feelings (but I could be way off). If I don’t get some advice soon I will be so far gone in my brain that we will be married in my head while she could be over here like ‘oh I didn’t mean it like that hehe oops’. I would simply die.
***UPDATE (January 28):
I’ve been checking her spotify playlists to see if she’s created any playlists that would corroborate this hypothetical romance. I would be able to tell right away. But alas, nothing. However, I did see that she added ‘Home’ to a playlist that she made foabout one of her close friends who has been going down a dark path in life recently. She cares for this person very much, which I respect, and has been trying to save her from making borderline life-threatening decisions. I can’t help but feel like this update drastically minimizes the significance that this song may have for me/us.. Feeling kind of stupid and a little sad. Still desperately need more info/signs from her.
P.S. I will be a grown up and have a real conversation with her about all of this soon. I just need your help so I can figure out how to navigate it.