Introduction: The Mysterious Double Album
I’ll always remember 2 AM on April 19th 2024. I was in my pjs, alone, on my balcony, fresh off my first listen to Taylor Swift’s album The Tortured Poet’s Department. After sufficiently enjoying my solitary experience, I took to the internet to see what the masses were saying…when Swift dropped a whole second album: The Tortured Poets Department Anthology. Swift, a master of both Easter egging surprises for her fandom and practicing the number one rule of business (give the people what they want!), had been hinting at something “double” for months. Most significantly, while accepting her Grammy for Best Pop Vocal Album, she flashed a “peace sign.” That damn peace sign haunted the fandom for months. Swift’s corporate social media account, u/TaylorNation, used peace sign emojis and called attention to the number two whenever possible (ie teasing the album 22 days out etc.). There were also many “2”s present in in the promotional “experiences” leading up to the album release date—including statues of peace signs at the TTPD interactive experience at The Grove in LA. As usual, some Swifties went bonkers with their theories (or “clowning” as outlandish theorizing is referred to in the community). I myself couldn’t help but believe some concept of doubling would be significant in TTPD, but I couldn’t have guessed a full DOUBLE album (Swift’s capitalization). What an absolute treat. Mother was, as they say, mothering.
…Only the two mania didn’t seem to end post-drop. If anything, the two mania heightened. The albums were not just surprises in themselves, they were full of mystery. They seemed to reference multiple relationships, cryptic narratives, allusions to Swift’s previous songs, allusions to iconic poets, and very often, twins. The sleuthing type of Swiftie (full disclosure, moi) dove in deep. We gathered where we do—on Twitter, on TikTok, on Reddit (my preferred sandlot). And as we obsessed over every lyric, literary allusion, and video clip, Swift, our self-appointed “chairman” seemed to encourage us. Swift added a TTPD set to her Eras tour in Paris. Afterward, she posted a collection of photos to Instagram. The second photo of the post is Swift onstage, in a sparkling showman’s outfit, flashing two fingers.
Initial Tortured Poets and Sylvia Plath Connections
Swift has always been an incredible poet, but that’s not necessarily how the world saw hesees her. Swift is a pop star, specifically, Swift was a young girly pop star, most known for her tabloid romances and dramas, which she would (allegedly) write about in her music. Swift’s work has been labeled as “confessional” since her first album, which included songs she openly said were about boys at her high school. I offer this context (or, lore) to explain why I began seeing connections to TTPD in Sylvia Plath’s “confessional” work.
Of course, the theme of TTPD is tortured poets, so many avid literary Swifties have enjoyed seeking connections between Swift’s new songs and iconic poetry. No connections are overt, but some seem to be more likely than others. Namely, there’s been much discussion of Virginia Woolf thanks to the song “Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?”(perhaps a riff on the Edward Albee play title). Other Swifties have found possible lyrical links to Mary Shelley and Charlotte Bronte. Swift herself references Patti Smith and Dylan Thomas in the album’s title track.
I remembered a third poet in relation to Smith and Thomas: Sylvia Plath, obviously an all timer of a tortured poet. I remember hearing an anecdote that she had been obsessed with Thomas and stalked him outside the Chelsea Hotel (also named in the TTPD title track). I did a quick skim of Plath’s Wikipedia to confirm and then started noticing many possible connections to TTPD and Plath’s life.
In the “Fortnight” music video, Swift acts out being institutionalized for insanity and getting electric shock treatment—two significant experiences in Plath’s life. Plath was also coupled with a deeply problematic man, Ted Hughes. Plath fell in love with Hughes for his artistic talent before he revealed himself to be an unsupportive parter, ultimately cheating on Plath with a younger woman. The narrative is not too dissimilar to the narrative about Swift’s alleged ex Matty Healy, as seemingly told in TTPD. (Of course, we don’t know the true subjects of Swift’s songs—if they’re even actually confessional—but some key hints point to Healy. Whether those hints provide actual context to Swift’s life or to the story Swift is telling of her life, one cannot know.) Finally, several of TTPD songs reference a latent desire for suicide (“I might as well die / it would make no difference” etc.). Okay, post-“finally,” these are stretches, but, I’ll note anyway: one of Plath’s most famous collections of poems is titled Ariel, but an alternate title was Daddy. There are connections to both words in TTPD via the song “But Daddy I Love Him.” The title is a line from the Disney movie The Little Mermaid (which features the main character Ariel, a mermaid, caught between two worlds). Extra clowning: some people (hi, I'm people) believe Swift’s 1989 costume for her first Paris concert was an allusion to Ariel: a pink crop top and a seafoam skirt.
As I dug into Plath's life, I couldn’t help but also see similarities to Swift's life. Both women were prolific writers from a very young age. Also, although possibly obscured through artistic license, both women were/are known to write about their own lives. (Plath was apparently encouraged by her professors Robert Lowell and Anne Sexton to write from her experience. I cannot help but tie in Swift’s “The Manuscript” lyric “the Professor said to write what you know.”) Both Plath and Swift expressed/express their depression via their writing, but if you only knew them from their public personas, you’d never guess the depths of their struggles. It seems both Plath and Swift lived/live double lives. Plath was actually fascinated by the concept of doubles. In fact, the concept of doubling was the topic of Plath’s college thesis paper “The Magic Mirror.”
The Magic Mirror and TTPD
Plath’s college paper is sadly not available to the general public. (It had a limited print run in, you guessed it, 1989.) But! I was able to read a few texts about the thesis, and the amount of possible TTPD references is astounding.
Since we can’t directly analyze Swift’s work via Plath’s directly, I’d like to share several key quotes from the most telling article I could find about the “The Magic Mirror”: “Sylvia Plath’s Magic Mirror” by Kelly Coyne (May 2018, The Los Angeles Review of Books). (To be noted, Coyne has also written about Swift, in her article “Growing Up In Taylor Swift’s America” in December 2023 on Literary Hub—a fabulous read!)
Early in her article, Coyne sets the scene for Plath's thesis:
“Her undergraduate thesis, which she wrote as a senior at Smith College...is titled “The Magic Mirror: A Study of the Double in Two of Dostoevsky’s Novels.” “The Magic Mirror” explores literary doubles made up of a character’s repressed traits, and, as the double grows in power, it heralds the protagonist’s death. Citing Robert Louis Stevenson’s The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde as well as Oscar Wilde’s The Picture of Dorian Gray, Plath argued that the choice to create a double works to “reveal hitherto concealed character traits in a radical manner” and simultaneously exposes the driving conflicts of the novel housing that character. Her thesis claims that both Ivan, of The Brothers Karamazov, and Golyadkin, of The Double, have attempted to repress troubling aspects of their personalities, resulting in the double.”
Immediately, I imagine the two versions of Swift from the “Anti-Hero” music video. One Swift is real, true, sensible. The other is a pot-stirring, self-esteem destroying, alcoholic. During Eras, the huge Swift (monster on a hill) screams and stomps around in the background while the real, true Swift smiles and dances in a sparkle dress onstage. The fandom seems to be referring to these two Swifts as Taylor Swift and TAYLOR SWIFT (TM). Folks have theorized Post-Malone in the Fortnight music video is not necessarily a lover, but a twin, or double, of Swift. This theory is enhances by the Eras visuals during that song, specifically two dancers walking away to the back of the stage, but then becoming one.
More Coyne: “Plath, quoting Dostoyevsky in her thesis, noted that Ivan’s double, Smerdyakov, is “wrinkled” and “yellow.” The distinct differences in appearance between originator and double, she continued, are meant to reflect the protagonist’s mental state and cultural status.”
First of all, yellow. In the Gaylor community, folks have often theorized yellow symbolizes being closeted—a reading based on the symbolic coloring in the 1999 film …But I’m a Cheerleader. However, one need not be a Gaylor to consider the importance of yellow to Swift’s storytelling. Most recently, Swift performed “my tears ricochet” at Eras in a bright yellow dress, as her dancers were dressed for a funeral. Following Coyne’s analysis of Plath's analysis of Dostoyevsky, one could guess Swift is teasing a death of some version of herself.
Coyne discusses how Plath clearly used a “double” of herself to write The Bell Jar. Plath herself spent a summer in New York interning for Mademoiselle. The protagonist in TBJ, Esther, spends a summer in New York interning at a magazine too. To go even further down the rabbit hole, Esther also doubles herself, frequently expressing normalcy on the outside and despair on the inside. On the book's first page, Esther tells her audience, “I was supposed to be having the time of my life.” (Again, I cannot help but hear a Swift echo of, “I can read your mind / she’s having the time of her life” from “I Can Do It With a Broken Heart” about smiling through her depression.) Coyne makes many more references to mirrors and concealing in The Bell Jar, Ether’s split (and sadness) gets worse and worse the more she hides who she is from others. Notably, at a low point, Esther hides under her mother’s bed. (And Swift sings of a post-heartbreak depression, “Afterwards she only ate kids' cereal / And couldn't sleep unless it was in her mother's bed.”)
Coyne writes about the “imprisoned” aspect of doubles: “The wound from which Esther tries, and fails, to hide chimes with the inescapable, colonizing double, and Plath’s language again illustrates its penal nature: it is inside Esther, but it traps her like a jail cell.” (Again, I cannot help but see references to “Fresh Out the Slammer”, “The Smaller Man Who Ever Lived,” and the TTPD Eras visuals of cages and cell lighting.)
Coyne, on Plath’s doubles’ names, something Swift has not ever used (or so we think): “From her conception of The Bell Jar all the way to its final revisions, Plath suffered an exhausting amount of anxiety over its heroine’s name.” Plath wrote to a friend, “‘I’ll have to publish it under a pseudonym, if I ever get it accepted, because it’s so chock full of real people I’d be sued to death’...Indeed, this wasn’t mere paranoia; she did have to change her protagonist’s name at the instruction of her editor for legal reasons.”
Coyne continues, “Most novelists likely have concerns about being associated with the characters to whom they give life, especially the ugly ones, and especially when the character resembles its author. Yet what is unique about Plath’s case is her knowledge of the theoretical underpinnings and implications of her choice to push Esther away, and the hold this knowledge assumed on Plath’s work and life. Another look at The Bell Jar with a consideration of Esther as Plath’s double tangles the issue even further, and Plath drops clues for this kind of reading throughout the novel. Esther, for example, sits down to write her own novel and recounts, “My heroine would be myself, only in disguise. She would be called Elaine. Elaine. I counted the letters on my fingers. There were six letters in Esther, too. It seemed a lucky thing.” Not coincidentally, Plath’s first name has six letters as well.” Again, Plath was in a bizarre double infinity loop (like the loop on the Eras stage in “Down Bad”?). Plath was concealing her double, the protagonist in her novel, who was concealing her double, the protagonist in her novel.
Coyne wraps up her findings: “In her thesis, written nearly a decade earlier, as she turned 22 — the year after her first documented suicide attempt — Plath claimed, quoting Otto Rank:
In such situations, where the Double symbolizes the evil or repressed elements in man’s nature, the apparition of the Double “becomes a persecution by it, the repressed material returns in the form of that which represses.” Man’s instinct to avoid or ignore the unpleasant aspects of his character turns into an active terror when he is faced by his Double, which resurrects those very parts of his personality which he sought to escape. The confrontation of the Double in these instances usually results in a duel which ends in insanity or death for the original hero.”
Coyne seems to argue Plath believed an artist's double has the power to become bigger than the artist herself, ultimately killing her. Is TTPD Swift's predetermination of, hopefully, her her double's death instead of her own?
In Conclusion: Plath to her Mentor, Dessner on Swift
Who knows what TTPD is really truly about, and who knows if we ever will.
The biggest Easter egg, hiding in plain sight, is that the album is titled THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT. There’s no apostrophe after “poet.” Nor is there an apostrophe after the “s” in “poets.” The department does not belong to a poet or to a collection of poets. It is a department OF tortured poets, perhaps two, to be exact. …or perhaps the album indicates the departure of the tortured poet...and her double.
I’ll sign off with two final quotes from my research:
According to Coyne, three months before Plath died by suicide, she had written a mentor about her second (obviously unfinished) book. Plath wrote, “It is to be called “Doubletake”, meaning that the second look you take at something reveals a deeper, double meaning […] it is semi-autobiographical about a wife whose husband turns out to be a deserter and philanderer although she had thought he was wonderful & perfect.”
According to Aaron Dessner’s TTPD release Instagram post: ”Keep searching and you'll find some new detail, layer or sliver of meaning with each listen.”
SUBREDDIT PS! Shout out to Expensive_Succotash5 for noting the TTPD intro poem's reference to being out of the oven, could be an allusion to Plath's death. Also shout-out to Good-Amphibian-7993 for this connection to a photo of Plath with a rose, not unlike Swift's album rose art.

i specifically remember stan eating like a chocolate fudgesicle or whatever and whether he eats one of them he has to “keep it real”
i always quote it irl by saying “hey im just keeping it real” and idk if ive just hallucinated this scene lmfao can anyone help

I’ve had a number of smell hallucinations with my migraine. For a time it was smelling garbage. Thankfully that ended and was replaced by smelling hot chocolate. Unfortunately that time is over and it has now been replaced with smelling oxalic acid (barkeepers friend). You really don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone. I don’t know why my brain has decided this is the smell now. It happened after I did some cleaning with barkeepers friend. I had used it plenty of times before and not had my brain decide I need to smell that smell. Now I am smelling it all the time in the “interictal” phase. Interictal in quotes as I’ve been getting some pretty regular attacks and symptoms so maybe I’m being generous to call it interictal lol.
If you get them, what olfactory hallucinations does your brain decides it needs to bring into your life despite the thing that smells like that not being there?

Bundle deals available! There are mostly samples, but there are some full-sizes as well. I priced to sell, but am open to reasonable offers. More details are on my spreadsheet. New items have been added recently.

• Most perfumes were received direct from the original store. If you want me to double-check, just let me know!
• All perfumes are kept in a cool, dark place. I live in a non-smoking and pet-free house.
• Payment via PayPal G&S. I will send an invoice. Prices are in USD.
• If buying multiple items that aren't already bundled, make me a reasonable offer for a discount :)
• I will ship within 7 days of payment, though I am often much quicker and will ship same/next day!
• Shipping is $13 tracked to Canada unless you're only getting a few samples, in which case it's $3 without tracking. Shipping to the US is typically around $13 tracked (I will provide a quote based on zip code).
• If purchasing >$50, I'll offer a 50% discount on shipping. If >$125, shipping will be free regardless of location!
• I'm mostly looking to sell, but will consider swaps for scents listed on my ISO tab. However, I'm looking to get multiple items (at least three) from one seller.

Fantome:

• Ivan the Fool: Golden figs, oakmoss, Siberian fir, well-worn Russian leather, cedar, warm wolf fur, juniper berries, sparkling bergamot
  
• Vasilia (FS): Clover honey, neroli, rich tonka, chamomile, dry hay, a flower crown of marigolds & sunflowers
  

Stereoplasm:

• Clemency (2 samples are available): Myrrh, clementine teak, thyme, photographic fixer, tobacco, suede
  
• Disco Stardust (both a FS and sample are available): Winter Mai Tais, roll-on lip gloss, expensive sunglasses, tanning bed oil and new car smell
  
• Excitation: Frothed Irish cream with rye whiskey, evaporated milk, wild honey and chocolate covered coffee beans
  
• Flowers in the Rain: Warm rain, carnation corsage, pink musk and passion fruit
  
• Gone Gnome: Top notes of cilantro and key lime rooted in fresh garden basil, english cucumber and melon blossom
  
• Kindling: Sweet jasmine incense, sunset musk, fresh sativa and strawberry wine
  
• Opaline: Iridescent and heavy stones of opalized amber, birds of paradise, frozen yucca and lacquered teak
  
• Perdotmint (both a FS and sample are available): Gems of concorde pear, crushed spearmint, iced green tea and classic jade accord
  
• Reverie: Frozen pollen, prickly gooseberry vine, raw cashmere wool and midnight blooming primrose
  
• Rickey: Old Tom Gin and muddled cilantro impress upon star wedges of Mary Ellen Sweet Lime in bubbly soda
  
• The Presents: A jar of homemade apricot jam, the worn pages of a favourite book, a golden yellow beeswax candle, a soft cashmere scarf to keep you cozy all year long.
  
• Toasted Matchimellow (FS): Bright green ice cream baked inside marshmallow meringue (usually found during summer months in cafe midi)
  
• Yellownog: Intoxicating bourbon-vanilla, cigar-smoked cinnamon, clementine stars, shredded coconut and Chantilly cream
  

CocoaPink:

• Black Voodoo: Rich amber resins, spiritueuse double vanilla, butterscotch, bourbon vanilla, hot butter rum & coconut crème
  
• Fear of Ghosts: Glowing marshmallow orbs and smoky vanilla spectral mists swirl aimlessly around an old bonfire in the Crisp October night air – Fresh vanilla puffed marshmallows, toasted marshmallows, hints of bonfire smoke among scattered sharp grains of white rice
  
• Full Moon: Blackberry, Coconut Milk, Marshmallows, White Chocolate
  
• Gooey Caramel: Real, old fashioned caramel, the gooey, salty kind made with real butter
  
• Handbook for the Recently Deceased: Wedding cake accord; sticky strawberries and raspberries; a shock of green melon and vibrant lime; an electric hint of mint and cilantro; grave soil; and a puff of smoke
  
• Pumpkin Kiss: Pumpkin flesh, soft bourbon vanilla, white and brown sugars kissed softly with pure cocoa absolute
  
• Warm Mittens: This fragrance evokes the memory of sitting around a campfire, holding a steamy mug of hot cocoa with marshmallows while wearing the woolliest, warmest pair of mittens.
  
• You'll Never Grow Old: The irresistible mingling of cotton candy, waffle cones, caramel popcorn, and candy apple is stalked by the tang of an oncoming storm, sea salt, freshly-dug dirt, and a primal, seductive musk
  

Possets:

• Mrs. Rabbit's Carrot Cake (FS): The most moist and vanilla drenched melting cake shot through with sugar encrusted rum kissed currents and golden raisins and crowned with the richest butter filled sour cream and ricotta frosting and trimmed with tiny spun sugar carrots, and grass
  
• Silver Narcissus: A stunning fragrance that combines the luxurious Possets' Silver Base with the iconic Narcissus flower, evoking the essence of a warm and vibrant spring morning
  
• Solis Anima: Blood Orange, Lychee Tea, Screwpine Flower, Tamarind, Cucumber, and Ginger, Tomato, Vetiver, Kadamba Flowers, and Sandalwood
  

Pulp Fragrances:

• An Accidental Interloper: Green tea, clary sage, rose geranium, evergreen boughs, white patchouli, vetiver and sweet amber musk
  
• Embrace: A kindly kitchen witch invites you in from the cold, feeds you pumpkin shortbread with butter, apricot preserves, and brown sugar & then sends you safely on your way.
  
• The Phantom Room: Cherry tobacco, honeyed almonds, red currants, cocoa butter, & vanilla balsam.
  
• Women In Dresses Running From Houses 2021: This year's version is smokier and sweeter: Caramellized sugar, a roaring bonfire, heliotrope, aged patchouli, and a hint of violet
  

Nui Cobalt:

• Hell Freezes Over: Decadent devil’s food cake, still warm from the oven, fluffy marshmallow frosting and the lightest dusting of crushed candy cane
  
• Little Brown Rabbit: Nutmeg and tonka bean nuzzle up against fluffy marshmallow, cottonflower, pink pepper, and a trace of carrot seed.
  
• Mendacity: Horchata: Classic horchata made from jasmine rice, demerara sugar, and true Ceylon cinnamon.
  
• Roll Initiative: Egyptian cotton, pale driftwood, white pepper, green cardamom, and a slender wisp of copal smoke.
  

Arcana Craves:

• Blueberries Crave Sunshine: Lemonade, watermelon, lime zest, golden gardenia, pearl musk, tiny blueberries, Black Dragon tea leaf, and blood red cedar

Sucreabeille:

• Alembic (FS): Sweet pumpkin souffle dotted with marshmallows and drizzled with buttery maple syrup. Tuberose wafts through the open front door

Arcana Wildcraft

• Witches Cavort with Cupcakes (FS): Pumpkin spice cupcakes are smothered in gobs of cream cheese frosting

Hexennacht

• I ♥ the 80’s: A Lisa Frank-esque powerhouse: tuberose, orange blossom, white amber, bubblegum, suntan oil, Aquanet hairspray, gummy worms, & fruit-scented erasers

Andromeda's Curse

• Strength: Coffee, Marshmallow, Milk Chocolate, Coumarin, Brown Sugar, Whipped Vanilla Frosting
  
• The Call of the Void: French Lavender, Nag Champa, Egyptian Amber, Sandalwood, Cedarwood, and Vanilla
  

Black Hearted Tart

• Autumn Sweater: Warm cedar, sweet vanilla musk, fallen leaves, crunchy acorns, pine cones, nutmeg, clove, and cinnamon
  
• Electric Feel: Sparkling lime, lychee fruit, rose, melon, grape, citrus glazed bundt cake, golden amber and sweet musk.
  
• Fade Into You: Bergamot, orange, lime, lemon, white and chocolate orchids, cocoa butter, sandalwood, and ambergris.
  
• Girlfriend In A Coma: Herbaceous blend of lavender leaves, flowers, vanilla musk, tonka bean, cedar, and sandalwood.
  
• Glory Box: Deep purple violets, brown sugar, juicy plum, fresh ozone, lily, heliotrope, dark musk, saffron, tonka bean and amber.
  
• Head Over Heels: Fresh apple, apricots, plum, citrus, pink magnolia, heliotrope, vanilla orchid, honeyed amber, marzipan, and sandalwood.
  
• Heart Shaped Box: Chocolate truffles made with cocoa powder, sweet cream, and a hint of vanilla bean.
  
• Honeybee: Buttery toffee, swirls of honey, and warm vanilla are brightened up with cheery bergamot and tart Brazilian orange.
  
• Melt With You: Scented in cocoa butter, raw honey, and chocolate notes.
  
• My Velouria: Red rose, peony, violet, amber, white musk, sandalwood, and woodsy cedar.
  
• Only In Dreams: White gardenia, calla lily petals, fluffy marshmallow clouds, and vanilla orchid musk.
  
• Piece Of My Heart: Lemony floral magnolia blossoms, waxy green tree leaves, sugar cane, cardamom pink pepper, vanilla bean, sandalwood and bitter almond.
  
• Pink Moon: Sun ripened raspberries, honeysuckles, pulps of juicy oranges, farm fresh peaches, and sugared pink grapefruit.
  

Poesie

• Nectar: These golden trumpet-shaped blossoms herald the arrival of summer. Nectar is the sweet scent of honeysuckle blossoms — honeyed, intoxicating, irresistible

Astrid

• Ensoleille: Orange blossom, bamboo, vanilla musk, lemon, sugar, palo santo, and litsea
  
• Whisper: Cherry blossom, a pair of patchoulis, sugar, and vanilla
  

Alkemia

• Vanille Armour (FS): Vanilla Infused with Warm Spices

Link again: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/19URt2wyxl2xQd8XN2CPKzqBv0ZANl65yUTx9Gx_u0a4/edit?usp=drive_link
Thanks for checking out my destash!

Here's a list of different forms of modern poetry, along with the title, poet, and a quote from a work that made the genre popular:

1. Spoken Word Poetry:
   
   • Title: "Holler If You Hear Me"
   • Poet: Saul Williams
   • Quote: "I exist without skin color, without nationality, without religious bias."
2. Instagram Poetry:
   
   • Title: "Milk and Honey"
   • Poet: Rupi Kaur
   • Quote: "you tell me to quiet down cause my opinions make me less beautiful but I was not made with a fire in my belly so I could be put out."
3. Hip-Hop Lyrics:
   
   • Title: "The Message"
   • Artist: Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five
   • Quote: "Don't push me 'cause I'm close to the edge. I'm trying not to lose my head."
4. Spine Poetry:
   
   • Title: "A Hummingbird in My House"
   • Poet: S.C. Wilson
   • Quote: "In my house, the air is filled with a hummingbird's song, sweet and gentle."
5. Lyrical Essays:
   
   • Title: "Citizen: An American Lyric"
   • Poet: Claudia Rankine
   • Quote: "Because white men can’t / police their imagination / black men are dying."
6. Instapoetry:
   
   • Title: "The Sun and Her Flowers"
   • Poet: Rupi Kaur
   • Quote: "how you love yourself is how you teach others to love you."
7. Twitter Poetry:
   
   • Title: Twitter poetry often exists as micro-poetry or haikus within the platform.
   • Poet: Various Twitter poets
   • Quote: "City lights whisper, hearts embrace the night, love blooms in shadows."
8. Song Lyrics (Rock):
   
   • Title: "Bohemian Rhapsody"
   • Artist: Queen
   • Quote: "Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango!"
9. Song Lyrics (Rap):
   
   • Title: "Lose Yourself"
   • Artist: Eminem
   • Quote: "You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow. This opportunity comes once in a lifetime."
10. Free Verse Poetry:
    
    • Title: "Leaves of Grass"
    • Poet: Walt Whitman
    • Quote: "I celebrate myself, and sing myself."
11. Ecopoetry
    
    • Title: "The Wild Iris"
    • Poet: Louise Glück
    • Quote: "You who do not remember / passage from the other world / I tell you I could speak again: whatever / returns from oblivion returns / to find a voice..."
12. Afrofuturist Poetry
    
    • Title: "Space is the Place"
    • Poet: Sun Ra (also a jazz musician)
    • Quote: "Space is the place of the mind; space is the place of the thoughts that are positive."
13. Pop Culture Poetry
    
    • Title: "The Princess Saves Herself in This One"
    • Poet: Amanda Lovelace
    • Quote: "but if you only shine light / on your flaws, all your perfects / will dim."
14. Transgressive Poetry
    
    • Title: "Hustle"
    • Poet: David Lerner
    • Quote: "Life's a fast car on a wet road, with no brakes and bald tires."
15. Multimedia Poetry
    
    • Title: "Inanimate Alice"
    • Poet: Kate Pullinger and Chris Joseph
    • Quote: "Inanimate Alice, Episode 4: 'Hometown' is a work that appeals not only to readers and writers but also to gamers and cinephiles."
16. Instapoetry
    
    • Title: "Salt."
    • Poet: Nayyirah Waheed
    • Quote: "if the ocean can calm itself, so can you. we are both salt water mixed with air."
17. Digital Minimalist Poetry
    
    • Title: "The New Census: An Anthology of Digital Poetry"
    • Poet: Stephane Mallarmé (the digital interpretation)
    • Quote: "Everything in the world exists in order to end up as a book."
18. Concrete Poetry
    
    • Title: "Easter Wings"
    • Poet: George Herbert
    • Quote: "With thee / O let me rise / As larks, harmoniously, / And sing this day thy victories."
19. Postcolonial Poetry
    
    • Title: "The God of Small Things"
    • Poet: Arundhati Roy
    • Quote: "Things can change in a day. All it takes is for something to happen that's not supposed to happen, and it sets off a chain of events that alters the course of everything."
20. Twitterature (Twitter Poetry)
    
    • Title: Various Tweets
    • Poet: Contemporary poets like Rupi Kaur, Warsan Shire, and others
    • Quote: "In the quietest hours of the night, I find solace in the echoes of your laughter. #moonlightwhispers"
21. Multimedia Poetry:
    
    • Title: "Hypertext Hotel"
    • Poet: Jodi Ann Stevenson
    • Quote: "In the digital corridors, every hyperlink is a door to a new verse."
22. Meme Poetry:
    
    • Title: "Internet Memes"
    • Poet: Various Internet Users
    • Quote: "Impact font wisdom, a generation's humor encapsulated in a single image."
23. Neo-Surrealist Poetry:
    
    • Title: "The Persistence of Memory"
    • Poet: Salvador Dalí (Visual Art)
    • Quote: "The only difference between me and a madman is that I am not mad."
24. Afrofuturist Poetry:
    
    • Title: "Parable of the Sower"
    • Poet: Octavia E. Butler
    • Quote: "All that you touch, you change. All that you change, changes you."
25. Virtual Reality Poetry:
    
    • Title: "VR Dreamscape"
    • Poet: VR Experience Designers
    • Quote: "In pixelated realms, dreams dance in virtual echoes."
26. Magnetic Poetry (Magnetic Words):
    
    • Title: Various Magnetic Poetry Kits
    • Poet: Various Magnetic Poets
    • Quote: "On fridges and desks, words collide to birth serendipitous verses."
27. Post-Internet Poetry:
    
    • Title: "Being and Time in the Internet Age"
    • Poet: Kenneth Goldsmith
    • Quote: "In the age of information, poetry is reclaimed from the detritus of the digital landscape."
28. Transcendentalist Poetry:
    
    • Title: "Walden"
    • Poet: Henry David Thoreau
    • Quote: "I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately."
29. Quantum Poetry:
    
    • Title: "The Dancing Wu Li Masters"
    • Poet: Gary Zukav (Science and Philosophy)
    • Quote: "The fact is, if you see it correctly, everything is dancing."
30. Asemic Writing Poetry:
    
    • Title: "The Asemic Poems"
    • Poet: Various Asemic Writers
    • Quote: "In the absence of recognizable text, the pen dances freely, creating abstract visual poetry."

There are many lessons to be learned in life, and sometimes laughing is the finest teacher. Not only will these 20 Funny Quotes About Life Lessons make you laugh, but they also include some insightful remarks that you'll think about long after the giggles stop.
Funny Quotes About Life Lessons:

1. "Life is short, smile while you still have teeth."
2. "I'm not clumsy, I'm just allergic to gravity."
3. "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right."
4. "I finally realized that growing up is overrated... and maybe unnecessary."
5. "Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn't last long if you're around me."
6. "Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it."
7. "I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode."
8. "If at first, you don't succeed, then skydiving is not for you."
9. "I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing."
10. "I'm not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them."
11. "I'm not short, I'm concentrated awesome!"
12. "The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe, eat cake."
13. "Life is too short to be serious all the time. So, if you can't laugh at yourself, call me, I'll laugh at you."
14. "I'm not old, I'm a classic."
15. "I'm not late, everyone else is just early."
16. "I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing."
17. "I don't need anger management, you just need to stop making me mad."
18. "I'm not saying I hate you, but I would unplug your life support to charge my phone."
19. "My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I was supposed to do."
20. "I'm not bossy, I just know what you should be doing."

Conclusion:
Life is too brief to give it too much seriousness. Not only can these funny sayings about life lessons make you laugh but they act as an easy reminder to enjoy the experience rather than take things too seriously. Laughing is the most effective medicine, after all!

Monday is the first day of the work week that many people dread. Not all people dread it, but some. Let's take a look into the Numerology of Monday to decode the energy and what it can be used for to work with it and not against it.
M - this is the 13th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 4. The energy of 1 is action and the energy of 3 is connecting with others through collaboration. This puts a focus on responsibilities and for most people, it's a work or school day which connects with this. Although it is about being responsible, it's still the energy of 4 which is mellow and controlled energy. O - this is the 15th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 6 which is about using your creativity constructively to take care of the tasks or duties you need to take care of. 6 is the number of beauty, duty, and routine. N - 14th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 5. This is about using your energy to be responsible and making space for enjoyment while doing so. 14 is a karmic number, but not when used correctly. As a karmic number, 14 is about someone who ditched their responsibilities and now have to deal with some challeneges(5). Proper use of this energy is using it for creative purposes. D - 4th letter vibrating at the purest energy of 4 which is about calmness, caution, and security. A - vibrating at 1 as the first letter of the alphabet, this is about action and energy. Y - The 25th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 7, but through cooperation with others(2) and compassion for others(2) and with the use of creativity (5) or even humor(5). Big lover energy as 5 can point to romance and 2 can point to soulmates.
Monday full numerology comes down to 8 and 8 can represent long and drawn out processes, wait times, and pressure. The dreadful energy can be moreso due to this 8 energy. People can work with this energy by being patient as 8 points to tedious tasks. With this insight, you can now simply start expected a little time in between things and pacing yourself. It can seem like a long day or your duties may be plentiful.
This is a day best utilized in a constructive (8) way with the use of wisdom and calculation(7). The 7 is the soul urge influence of Monday based on the vowels. 2 vowels A and O which equals 7. Being calculating and seeking depth will allow you to master the energy of Monday. Use this day to get the most done with your projects or workloads.
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Todays letter is D!
Scoring will be done via upvotes with the highest upvoted quote being the winner. I will make a new post for the next letter on the next day and that'll include the highest upvoted quote.
A: "Alright, partner. keep on rollin baby. you know what time it is." - YeetusFelitas
B: "Bring it on!" - curnow
C: "CHOCOLATE STARFISH" - VanAintUsedUp

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Premium Silver Rounds and Coins (any coin in capsule will come that way, otherwise shipped in flips)

• Vintage US Silver Corp 1 oz Easter Bar. Super crisp!
  • $31
• Sunshine Minting Half Ounce Eagle
  • $16
• 2015 ASE Apmex TEP
  • $33
• 2022 Pirates of the Caribbean Silent Mary
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Constitutional 90%

• $9.00 in mixed barber halves. Variety of dates and mintage. Some are on the border honestly, but i'll let you be the judge.
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I’m so glad this sub exists because I’ve been annoying everyone in my life with my theories about these two … I figured this would be the right place to post my speculation/lyric breakdowns of songs that they may have written about each other, split into different posts for albums for ease of reading.
Starting with Reputation (2017) – I imagine the failed relationship with Matty was still fresh for Taylor during the writing/recording of this album. Her reference to her “longings locked in lowercase inside a vault” definitely made me look back at Rep in a way I hadn’t before (and I do think we’ll see some Matty-coded vault tracks on TV”. That said I don’t want to erase her other relationships, especially with Joe, so I’ll make notes of where I think I’m either stretching for a Matty connection or I think there are multiple muses.
Special mention to “Getaway Car” which feels like another (fictionalized?) response to Robbers but the story she tells is very similar to her fling with Tom, especially given the third man in the song. I usually claim it for the maylors anyway bc who cares about Tom. Let me know what you think.
“...Ready For It?”
Knew he was a killer first time that I saw him / Wonder how many girls he had loved and left haunted / But if he's a ghost, then I can be a phantom
I can't ignore the connections here to two other songs thought to be written about M - Ghost (2014) and Haunted (2015) by Halsey (I won't bother going into the HalseyMatty lore here but I could in another post...)
"You're a Rolling Stone boy, never-sleep-alone boy / Got a million numbers and they're filling up your phone, boy" (Ghost) "I'm begging you to keep on haunting me" (Haunted) "My ghost / Where'd you go? / I can't find you in the body sleeping next to me" (Ghost)
I can be a phantom holdin' him for ransom / Knew I was a robber first time that he saw me / Stealing hearts and running off and never saying sorry / But if I'm a thief, then he can join the heist / And he can be my jailer
Robbers is one of The 1975’s most famous songs. In the music video two lovers stick up a convenience store - definitely worth a watch if you haven't seen it. In 2014 M dedicated the song to T in Dallas in November 2017 (a week after she attended the concert in LA) here and here
Burton to this Taylor
One of my favorite references that I think reveals a lot about the messy but irresistible relationship M and T seem to have. Here's a link to a great article about the wild love affair between Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton.
Every love I've known in comparison is a failure / I forget their names now, I'm so very tame now / Never be the same now
This sentiment is repeated throughout many of the songs I believe are about M. The idea of a life altering love is obviously prevalent across TTPD but also in folklore, evermore, and Midnights. ex. "I'm never gonna love again" (cowboy like me), "I don't remember who I was before you painted all my nights a color I have searched for since" (Question...?), "I felt aglow like this / Never before and never since" (loml)
Also want to mention This Must Be My Dream from 2016, which M has said is about an older gf but may fit: "Let me tell you 'bout this girl / I thought she'd rearrange my world"
No one has to know / In the middle of the night, in my dreams / You should see the things we do, baby
See Guilty as Sin? lol
Baby, let the games begin
Taylor in an interview with Glamour in February 2014:
TS: [Nods. Pauses.] I think everyone should approach relationships from the perspective of playing it straight and giving someone the benefit of the doubt. Until he establishes that this is a game. And if it's a game, you need to win. The best thing to do is just walk away from the table.
CL: Is that winning?
TS: It is when they come back. [Laughs.] And if they don't, then they didn't care enough to begin with.
conclusion: I believe ...Ready For It? is a response to Robbers and reveals M and T's similar romanticism (sometimes toxic but so addicting). The mirrored stylization of ...Ready For It? and Question...? makes me think the latter is a continuation of the former. The mentions of “island breeze” and “we’ll move to an island” have made people believe this song is about Tom Hiddleston but other lyrics, namely “younger than my exes” pretty clearly contradicts that.
"End Game"
I wanna be your end game / I wanna be your first string /I wanna be your A-Team
Funny reading this after The Alchemy and So High School.
Big reputation, big reputation / Ooh, you and me, we got big reputations / And you heard about me / Ooh, you and me would be a big conversation
And they were! Especially because T hadn't been really linked to anyone after Harry, the speculation about her and M came hard and fast. M especially was inundated with questions in the months after the LA and NYC shows.
And I heard about you / You like the bad ones, too
Another possible reference to a Halsey song, this time Hurricane from 2014: "He says, "Oh, baby, beggin' you to save me / Well, lately I like 'em crazy/ Oh, maybe, you could devastate me"
I don't wanna touch you, I don't wanna be / Just another ex-love you don't wanna see / I don't wanna miss you / Like the other girls do
Very reminiscent of The 1975's song Somebody Else, released in 2016, speculated to be about T: "I don't want your body / But I hate to think about you with somebody else"
I hit you like bang, we tried to forget it, but we just couldn't
"Flashbacks waking me up / I get drunk, but it's not enough" (Death By A Thousand Cuts)
And I bury hatchets, but I keep maps of where I put 'em
"I circled you on a map / I haven't come around in so long" (The Alchemy)
Reputation precedes me, they told you I'm crazy
"And they tried to warn you about me" (The Albatross)
And I can't let you go, your hand prints on my soul
"Marked me like a bloodstain" (Cardigan)
It's like your eyes are liquor, it's like your body is gold
So many of the songs speculated to be about M reference his eyes but the most relevant (not the starry eyed motif which we'll get to in the future) are: "Eyes like sinking ships on waters / So inviting I almost jump in" (gold rush) and "But your eyes are flying saucers from another planet / Now I'm all for you like Janet" (Snow On The Beach)
"Deep blue, but you painted me golden" (Dancing With Our Hands Tied)
You've been calling my bluff on all my usual tricks / So here's the truth from my red lips
From the same Glamour article, Taylor talking about her 'trick' when dating:
CL: What's the freeze-out?
TS: You don't respond to any of his texts or calls until he does something desperate [like] shows up. Or he calls and leaves a voice mail. Something that makes it very clear to you that he's interested.
disclaimer: I am someone who thinks the Tom relationship was not that serious for T, so this song imo fits what she may have told us about her relationship with M more, though the beach reference does point to Tom in a way.
"Don't Blame Me"
I've been breaking hearts a long time / And toying with them older guys / Just playthings for me to use
See the quotes from the Glamour article above. "Younger than my exes, but he act like such a man, so" (...Ready For It?)
Something happened for the first time / In the darkest little paradise
May refer to the dark concert venue where they met for the first time (see So It Goes... for more)
For you / I would cross the line / I would waste my time / I would lose my mind / They say, "She's gone too far this time."
Sentiment that is repeated throughout TTPD, but most clearly in But Daddy I Love Him
My name is whatever you decide / And I'm just gonna call you mine
Though this could be a stretch, in the spotify storyline for The 1975's Oh Caroline (2022), speculated to be about T, M said "It's an invented character, where the cadence really mattered. It couldn't be "Oh Linda" or "Oh Jane" [or "Oh Taylor"] - you had to have a 3 syllable that really works. I knew what the song was about, I had felt that about someone before and I got to write an episodic, mini movie about the subject"
disclaimer: If about M, this song is very on the nose with the drug references. Generally it's a very vague song and could easily be about Joe or another ex.
"So It Goes..."
See you in the dark / All eyes on you, my magician / All eyes on us / You make everyone disappear
Likely refers to the first time T saw M in person, when she was front row at The 1975's LA show. All eyes were on M then (including T's)
"Once upon a time, the planets and the fates / And all the stars aligned / You and I ended up in the same room / At the same time" (Mastermind)
Tripping, tripping when you're gone
May relate to Don't Blame Me: "Trip of my life / every time you're touching me"
'Cause we breakdown a little / But when you get me alone, it's so simple
Maybe a stretch but M famously had a breakdown on stage in Boston on December 6, 2014. In an interview with the Guardian he said: “There was girl stuff. There was family stuff. There was financial stuff. There was drug stuff. I remember hearing the crowd and having an identity crisis. I thought: ‘If you want to see a show, I’ll give you a fucking show. If you’ve come to see the jester drink himself into a slumber, I’ll give it to you.’ I felt like I’d become an idea as opposed to being a person.”
“And I was 25 and afraid to go outside” (Give Yourself a Try)
And all the pieces fall / Right into place
"I laid the groundwork and then, just like clockwork / The dominoes cascaded in a line" (Mastermind)
Getting caught up in a moment / Lipstick on your face
"I said, "Don't fall in love with the moment" / She said I've got a lot to learn / Don't fall in love with the moment /And think you're in love with the girl" (She's American)
Come here, dressed in black now
"Yeah, we're dressed in black from head to toe" (Chocolate). Taylor was also wearing all black the night of the LA show.
conclusion: You did a number on me / But, honestly, baby, who's counting? / I did a number on you / But, honestly, baby, who's counting? ( "King of My Heart"
We met a few weeks ago / Now you try on callin' me "baby" like tryin' on clothes
The reason why I don't necessarily think Joe fits. They met at the Met Gala in 2017 and she very quickly started seeing Tom, obviously it could still be him but I wanted to note this.
"Don't call me 'kid,' don't call me 'baby' / Look at this idiotic fool that you made me" (illicit affairs)
And you move to me like I'm a Motown beat
M loves Motown, even sampling a track by The Temptations on Tonight (I Wish I Was Your Boy). He's also always loved dancing, which you can see in the videos for A Change of Heart and Oh Caroline.
Salute to me I'm your American Queen / Say you fancy me, not fancy stuff
He's English, obviously.
And we rule the kingdom inside my room / With all these nights we're spending / Up on the roof with a school girl crush
Totally speculation but M and T hiding out in her NYC home makes a lot of sense from other pieces she has shared about the relationship “My kingdom come undone” (Hoax)
Late in the night, the city's asleep / Your love is a secret I'm hoping, dreaming, dying to keep
Speculation again but fits with the story of M and T as mostly loving each other in secret (see Dancing With Our Hands Tied and Dress)
Is this the end of all the endings? / My broken bones are mending
As mentioned above, T had seemingly taken a break from dating after the breakup with Harry.
disclaimer: Definitely not 100% sure on this one as there is convincing evidence that it is about J
"Dancing With Our Hands Tied"
I, I loved you in secret / First sight, yeah, we love without reason / Oh, 25 years old
M and T were both born in 1989, M was 25 when they first met and dated and T was turning 25.
My, my love had been frozen / People started talking, putting us through our paces / I knew there was no one in the world who could take it / I loved you in spite of / Deep fears that the world would divide us
“A red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground / With no one around to tweet it” (The Lakes)
In an interview with the Guardian Matty said: “The day after she’d been to a show of ours, someone sent me a screenshot of E! News with the headline ‘Who is Matt Healy?’ That freaked me out. I’m not ready to indulge in that world and I’m not ready to be judged by that world.” So sad to read knowing that they dealt with a similar situation nearly a decade later.
Picture of your face in an invisible locket
“Wear you like a necklace” (So It Goes…)
And darling, you had turned my bed into a sacred oasis
“Now you hang from my lips / Like the Gardens of Babylon / With your boots beneath my bed” (cowboy like me)
I'd kiss you as the lights went out / Swaying as the room burned down / I'd hold you as the water rushes in / If I could dance with you again
Reminds me so much of the music video for cardigan, where T slips into a rough ocean and hangs on to a piano. Also from cardigan: “Leaving like a father / Running like water”
“Dress”
Our secret moments in a crowded room / They got no idea about me and you
"Did you ever have someone kiss you in a crowded room / And every single one of your friends was / Making fun of you" (Question...?)
There is an indentation in the shape of you / Made your mark on me, a golden tattoo
M seemingly makes a lasting impression: “Deep blue, but you painted me golden” (Dancing With Our Hands Tied) “The mark they saw on my collarbone” (Maroon) “Marked me like a bloodstain” (cardigan)
'Cause I don't want you like a best friend
T often seems to refer to a friendship with M, perhaps they tried it a few times: “We were supposed to be just friends” (Glitch) “Like you were my closest friend” (Maroon) “Just say when, I'd play again / He was my best friend / Down at the sandlot” (My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys)
And if I get burned, at least we were electrified
“I'd kiss you as the lights went out / Swaying as the room burned down” (Dancing With Our Hands Tied)
I'm spilling wine in the bathtub / You kiss my face and we're both drunk
Many of the possible M songs refer to M and T’s love of wine. “And I can see us twisted in bedsheets / August slipped away like a bottle of wine” (august) “The burgundy on my T-shirt when you splashed your wine into me / And how the blood rushed into my cheeks, so scarlet, it was (maroon)” (Maroon)
disclaimer - Obviously most likely about Joe given the reference to the 2017 Met Gala but I think it was worth a mention!
“Call It What You Want”
My baby's fly like a jet stream / High above the whole scene
Probably a double-entendre. M considers himself slightly on the outside of the ‘scene’ but this can come across as self assurance. This also could refer to literally being high on drugs
Loves me like I'm brand new
After T’s clever use of The Starting Line in TTPD I’m convinced she’s referring to the band Brand New. M posted a Brand New album on his ig story in 2020.
All my flowers grew back as thorns
An interesting contrast to “I once was poison ivy, but now I'm your daisy” from Don’t Blame Me
Windows boarded up after the storm
“I look through the windows of this love / Even though we boarded them up” (Death By A Thousand Cuts)
I'm laughing with my lover
“Laughing with my feet in your lap” (Maroon) “Please don't ever become a stranger / Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere” (New Year’s Day)
Making forts under covers
Matty famously built a fort in ATPOAIM 3. “I'll build you a fort on some planet / Where they can all understand it” (Down Bad)
Trust him like a brother
“Like I lost my twin” (Down Bad)
Starry eyes sparking up my darkest night
So many starry eyed references which is terribly romantic and terribly sad. “Do I really have to chart the constellations in his eyes?” (High Infidelity), “Your opal eyes are all I wish to see” (ivy), “Eyes full of stars” (cowboy like me), and “Gazing at me starry-eyed” (The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived)
I want to wear his initial on a chain 'round my neck
“Picture of your face in an invisible locket” (Dancing With Our Hands Tied) “Wear you like a necklace” (So It Goes…)
I recall late November, holding my breath
Late November fits perfectly into the timeline of M and T’s 2014 relationship. Late October to Late DecembeEarly January makes the most sense.
Slowly I said, "You don't need to save me / But would you run away with me?"
“You're mad thinking you could ever save me. Not looking like that.” (A Change of Heart)
disclaimer: Again lots of Joe references in this as well so take this with a grain of salt.
“New Year’s Day”
You and me from the night before, but / Don't read the last page
From Me and You Together Song (2020): “I think the story needs more pages, yes.” The reference to “the last page” also makes this song feel like more of a reminiscence than a song about a current lover.
I want your midnights / But I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day
Impossible not to reread these lyrics after Midnights was released as a nod to M: “When the morning came we / Were cleaning incense off your / Vinyl shelf ‘cause we lost track of time again” (Maroon)
You squeeze my hand three times in the back of the taxi / I can tell that it's gonna be a long road / I'll be there if you're the toast of the town, babe / Or if you strike out and you're crawling home
Especially after the release of TTPD it seems that both T and M made many promises to each other that they couldn’t keep
Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you / Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you / Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you / And I will hold on to you
The reference to memories here creates a bit of a confusing feeling about the muse for this song. Although T seems to be talking in the present tense I do think these are memories and dreams for a past relationship.
“Hold on and hope that we'll find our way back in the end / Do you think I have forgotten? / Do you think I have forgotten? / Do you think I have forgotten / About you?” (About You)
Please don't ever become a stranger / Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere / Please don't ever become a stranger / Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere
Not much to say about this but ow!
You and me forevermore
Again reminds me of Me and You Together Song (which I do buy as a song at least partially about T). And of course links to Evermore.
disclaimer: This could absolutely be about Joe but it does feel almost like a goodbye to M, closing the album. It’s as if she is reading “the last page”
Congrats if you read this lol. I clearly have too much time on my hands

I've been traveling but now I'm BAAAACK!
Check out these indie perfumes I've got for sale (over 20 houses!) – loads of BPAL, Cocoapink, Kyse, MooScents and Solstice EDP decants, plus other wonderful houses! Shipping's a flat $5.50 for the US. If you are outside the US, I will need to quote shipping costs, Order minimum of $14. I will ship by Monday (5/20) and send tracking. Check out the spreadsheet for all the deets on fill levels, notes, and more. I've got some niche stuff too. Selling only for now (unless you have one of my ISOs)!
🌟Spreadsheet is right here: CHECK ME OUT! 🌟
ALL (Larger Sizes **)
Arcana Craves
· Cotton Candy **
· Garnet Grapefruit **
· Raspberry Whip **
· Strawberries Crave Summer
Arcana Wildcraft
· Afterglow **
· Dollface **
· Electra **
· Last Judgement **
· Mongolian Death Worm **
Astrid
· Abysmal Blush
· Acorns
· Obscura
· Pastel Black
BPAL
· A Doll's Doll **
· An Interlude after Sake (2017, Lupercalia) **
· Common Jezebel **
· Gingerbread Snek **
· Goldenrod Crab Spider (Halloweenie 2012) **
· Irish Coffee Buttercream **
· Red Rose, Black Pepper & Black Vegetal Musk **
· Schrodinger's Checkmark **
· Sugar Cookies & Bourbon **
· Vanilla Bean, Pistachio & Cacao **
· White Chocolate & Taro Cream **
· Western Diamondback **
· All night long
· Aunt Caroline's Joy Mojo
· Baobhan sith
· Brisingamen
· Darkness
· Deadly nightshade honey
· Depraved
· Dwarf
· Eat Me
· Elf
· Gingerbread Milk
· Hard Luck Lollipop
· Honeyed Pear Tart
· Mary shelley
· Oatmeal & Apple Spice Cookies
· Ouija
· Shanghai
· Shub-Niggurath
· The Antikythera Mechanism
· Twinkle, Twinkle Little Bat
Cirrus
· Parakeet
· It's just pears
· A Dog named Pam
· Maid Marian
Colornoise
· Jazz **
· Confidence **
CocoaPink (5mL EDP Decants)
· Cinderella's Carriage EDP**
· Fresh Strawberry EDP **
· Plums & Custard EDP **
· Boo Boo Lemon Noel EDP **
· Mad Hatter Cookies Noel EDP **
· Vanilla Bean Noel EDP **
· Pink Dragon EDP **
· Black Noel EDP **
· Violet Poundcake EDP **
· Faded memories
Crow & Pebble
· Bearer of Secrets
· Light That Endures
· Master of Bears
· Names Myriad
· Sea Wolf
Fae-tal Attractions
· Beedle
· Coquette
· Frog Princess
· GhOwOst
· Kunafa
· Luna Moth
Fyrinnae
· Alferous
Haus of Gloi
· Hex
Kyse (5mL EDP Decants)
· Cocco alla Vaniglia **
· Crema di Lime e Cognac **
· Delizia **
· Douceur Brulee **
· Frollino Lavanda **
· Jasmine Macarons **
· Macarons **
· Mandorlo Cioccolato **
· Oui Plus! **
Laurel & June
· Forever young EDP
Little Book Eater
· Southern Gothic
Moonalisa/MooScents (3mL EDP Decants)
· Abigail **
· Elspeth **
· Lemon Curd and Coconut Cream **
· Rose Petal Jam and Vanilla Cream **
· Vantasia **
Mythpunk Olfactive
· Paper Moon
NAVA
· Carpe Noctem **
· Cotton Candy Kashmir Crimson Marshmallow Musk **
· Cotton Candy Sandalwood Mallow Musk **
· Kashmir **
Nui Cobalt
· Kiss of Death
· The Quest
Possets
· Medusa **
Solstice Scents (5mL EDP Decants)
· Nightgown EDP **
· Cherry Vanilla Amberosia EDP **
· Violet Mallow EDP**
Sorcellerie Apothecary
· Mermaids Sing of Lost Lovers EDP **
· Stuck on You EDP **
· Witch's Valentine EDP **

Please note this is the original submission I sent Refinery29. In the current post,they have given me a second credit card with a 100$ balance, as well as generational trauma from World War II and cut context for other things. I am trying to get that fixed.
Per previous discussion in comments here: The espresso machine is a Bezzera, which ranges from 2-5K. We got ours on sale for 1.7K, it’s a work house and we use it everyday, still hurts that we spent that money on a coffee maker.
I do understand mortgage is debt but when you compare it to rent to a lesser value condo in Vancouver it feels like not debt at all, which is how I tend to think of it. Yes I owe my mortgage but also I get my house instead of renting-which may not have become clear.
Please see in full the diary, below (edit for formatting via mobile)
Occupation: Sr Business Analyst
Industry: Tech
Age: 30
Location: Vancouver Island, BC
Salary: 92,000$ (Spouse makes 60,000$ for a combined income of 152,000$ before tax)
Net Worth: ~ 1.2 Million ( house is valued at 989,000$ currently, we have a combined 150,000 in pension, and ~60,000 in various company stocks, and GICs)
Debt: 3,000$ in a zero interest credit card for a 10 month period. We balanced transferred and pay 400$/month. Debt was acquired in Q4 2023 when we had to buy Snow Tires, and do a full break replacement as well as Christmas. 480,000$ in a mortgage, we refinanced in September 2023 for five years fixed rate at accelerated biweekly, however I don’t consider our mortgage debt due to the equity we are gaining, and that our mortgage for a five bedroom, 3 bath single family home is less than rent for a two bedroom condo in Vancouver
Paycheck Amount (Every 2 Weeks): 2,555$ after taxes. (Just mine). Spouse makes 2,308$ after taxes. Our pay periods are alternating.
Pronouns: She/her
Monthly Expenses Mortgage: 1450$ biweekly (100$ extra to the principal).
Utilities: ~200$ (includes water [paid quarterly], hydro [paid bimonthly], gas, sewetrash [paid quarterly] phone [highly discounted due to work plans for spouse and myself] and car gas) Loan Payments: 400$/Credit Card
Car Insurance: 84$
Life Insurance: 167$ combined (67$ me, 100$ spouse)
Health & Dental Insurance: 60$ deducted from pay (coverage for myself and spouse from my employer. Spouse also has coverage for both of us deducted from pay)
Retirement Contribution: 400$ (Employee matches me), (Spouse has a defined pension through work and contributes ~200$ month)
Union fees: 70$ Spouse
Subscriptions: Crave 22$/month (Recent splurge for Binge watching the Rookie), Playstation Plus 100$ (annual bought on Black Friday Deal), Amazon Prime 80$ (Annual), BCAA 120$ (annual) Gym 30$/month (we both have one so 15$/pp)
Note: My spouse and I have completely commingled finances. I will be tracking both as it’s essentially I spent whatever they spent
Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
There was always the expectation. My father was very clear, we were very smart. There was no way we’d be wasting our potential. He wanted me to be a lawyer, but unlike other immigrant parents, I got to choose my major and went into social sciences and got my masters in history. I deferred my PhD too much so I got dropped by the program.
I chose my university by where I got a full first year scholarship and then after that took about 15k in student loans for my undergraduate. My parents paid my rent and I got a part time job for food.
For my masters, I had a student line of credit and 5 k student loans otherwise it was all my savings and scholarships. With the line of credit, I had a total of 30K in student loans and paid it off in about four years.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent(s)/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
Save. We talked about how you get a dollar allowance and half of it goes into long term saving with 25% in short term and 25% in spend.
Investing came after I was eighteen. Family would like us to invest in property, however I don’t really want to be a landlord, but also we wouldn’t get to really enjoy profit of owning a rental property due to other family circumstances.
What was your first job and why did you get it?
Ice cream parlour I was twelve and my parents made me get it for responsibility. I lasted three weeks because I hated it.
Did you worry about money growing up?
I grew up thinking we were not rich, because we didn’t get big plane vacations (I didn’t count flying from Toronto to Vancouver every summer as a vacation since we were just seeing family but staying in a house my parents owned) and I had only been to Disney twice.
But we had a big new build house in the rich end of town, my mom stayed home to raise all of us. We had to work for things (like going to see a movie opening night or a new CD) but we always had money and got what we wanted. In retrospect, my family was/is fairly well off.
Both my parents grew up poor, with parents working multiple jobs and different shifts to make ends meet, the strive/drive to not have that childhood, and for my father to be able to retire his parents really impacted mine and my siblings and cousins lives. My father showed me the apartment he grew up in Chinatown a few years back. It’s light years away from the house my grandparents owned when I was a kid and how I grew up.
Do you worry about money now?
Of course. Inflation is real and we are actively planning a wedding for the next year, as well as a baby in the next few years. We also need to buy a second car, so we’re saving for that.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
Fully financially responsible? Twenty five. I lived in a family property where I didn’t pay rent in one of the most expensive cities in Canada, so even though I paid all my bills (food and phone), I didn’t have to pay rent. I in fact made money, as I rented rooms out and used the income for house utilities, and paying my student loans down faster. When I moved in with my spouse, I just paid condo fees until we bought our house two years ago which gave me plenty of time to save.
Our financial safety net is family, and our savings. I know my family would bail us out. My spouse’s father would as well. Conversely, we are my spouse’s mother's safety net and we have to keep all our plans in mind that we will be subsidising her.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain. Yes, I received 50K from my parents once they sold my childhood home, as did both of my siblings. I have also received 10K from one set of grandparents which paid off my car and part of my student loans when I was 21. I will be receiving another inheritance when probate is done for around ~100K. My spouse also has received inheritance which allowed them to buy their first condo in their early twenties when the market was much better. That condo, 50k, and the subsequent upgrading helped us afford our house.
Day 1
10 AM: I drive to the pharmacy to pick up a prescription. Not how I want to start my Sunday morning but y’know. Normally I’d walk since it’s about 20 minutes but I have a UTI. I’m “lucky” that despite not having a dr because of the health care shortage, my work pays for the Maple app so I could get a dr to write the prescription and order the lab work at 1 am. I’ll do the lab work later this week when I can get an appointment but will take the relief now. Insurance makes the antibiotics free, but I also buy hydrogen peroxide because we’re out and we have a dog that thinks everything is meant to be in her mouth. We’ll buy a bigger one at Costco later. I also bought some oral wound mouthwash because we were out. I come home and my spouse made us breakfast.
Total: 15.90$ paid with debit.
1-2:30 PM: We do our taxes. I have a mini meltdown when I realize the part time bakery job I had for a few months didn’t take off income tax last year, so I owe 800$. Luckily, my partner is getting a refund so we net out positive 400$. The bakery took off income tax in 2022, so unsure why they didn’t in 2023. I made us lunch.
3-6:30 PM: We walk the dog, and watch the Rookie. Some time during that time period, a venue emails us back and is surprisingly affordable at 3k. I also get told that the tattoo artist I want to book with, has not chosen me.
6:30-7:30 PM: I explain what lazy girl dinner is to my spouse and make a lazy girl dinner. After not really grocery shopping since Feb for things besides fresh veg, we need to do a big pantry shop and neither of us want that. We debate about buying a food saver and if we should wait for a sale. My spouse is more frugal than me and has determined we should.
8-9:30 PM: We start season 3 of The Rookie, and then after two episodes we go to bed
Day One Total: 15.90$
Day Two
5:45-8 AM: Wake up and start work. I get up to date with what’s happened on the weekend and check that my automated reports. Sometime before 6:30, I get the kettle on for my spouse’s pour over before I go back to my meetings. There’s a twenty minute gap where I get changed and do my skin care and brush my teeth. I’d love to be a skin care person but honestly I’ve spent too much money on product that I don’t use and that just goes bad. Washing my face and using sun screen is a win.
I also make sure that Spouse’s lunch is in his bag and I get our travel mugs ready. Before, we used to go to Starbucks every day. Starbucks used to do free refills on coffee and tea if you were a rewards member if you bought a coffee or tea so it would cost us $5/day (2.5/pp), and we could get refills all day. While that’s 20$/week, 80$/a month and yes, we could have saved it but back then, that 80$ wasn’t turning the dial anywhere significantly for us—a privileged view.
But now, after COVID where I stopped drinking tea after one day working from home having like 10 cups and thinking I was dying, and Spouse has bought a good grinder and we recently splurged on a stupidly expensive espresso machine we call his Engagement Espresso since it costs the same price as my stupidly expensive ring, we bring our coffees.
8-8:30 AM: We drive to work. Prior to buying our house, we were both work from home and lived in a city with amazing transit. We only needed the one car. Since buying the house and moving to a city where public transit is a joke (the one bus goes past our house every 1.5h), Spouse changed jobs and is in office every day and I have to go in 3 days a week. We need a second car or the e-bike rebate to come through. We debate this in the car, since I’m done at 1 pm, and Spouse works normal hours, I either have to take the bus home, or go to the gym for three hours. Today though, I drop Spouse off. I will pick him up later as he has a half day because of the dentist
8:30-12:30 AM/PM: Work. I find a tech manager and ask them to get me more triple a batteries. Work won’t provide or let me expense batteries for my mouse, despite them replacing my usb mouse with a battery one. The poor admin had to tell me the decision is that we’ll all supply our own batteries. Luckily the tech managers have to have batteries on hand and give them out freely.
I ask my boss how the work from home tax forms work, and he is going to find out.
I run more meetings and work on a request for a dashboard and a business case for a new feature that I have to convince leadership to spend money on.
12:30-1 PM: I drive back to my Spouse because he has a dentist appointment.
While I wait for a spouse, I am incredibly hungry. I’m usually not hungry/don’t eat a proper meal until around 1 in the afternoon and my two granola bars I already ate at the office. I go to the bakery by Spouse’s work and buy a cheese bun for me (3.65$), and an apple pie scone (2.55$) for Spouse as a snack. Spouse points out he won’t be able to eat until after his appointment.
Total: 6.20$ debit
1-1:30 PM: I drop Spouse off, and the car stops working. The engine won’t catch. I try multiple times and then run into the dentist to dramatically announce to Spouse and the receptionists that the car won’t start. Spouse asks me what he wants me to do about this, since he’s about to go into an appointment. A very kind receptionist tells me it might be the alternator. I don’t know what that is.
I go back to the car to Facetime my father. He also asks what I think he can do to help since he lives 3000 km away. Weirdly, and sexistly, I thought a man who grew up at race tracks, in a racing family, or the man who has collected and worked on sports cars for forty years might be able to help.
Spouse texts me to remind me we have BCAA while my father also tells me that. I finally get the engine to catch and drive the very long way home, going the speed limit and getting stuck in traffic, construction and a bus. It takes me 20 minutes to get home instead of 10.
1:30-2:30 PM: I walk the dog, mail a (late) birthday card and then start researching what an alternator is. The car is over a decade old and until the house, the most expensive thing I ever bought at 12K back in 2015. We have the funds for the cost, but it’s my first car and the fact it might be the end of its life is scary.
Alternators can cost between 400-800$ repair with labour, so that’s fun.
My dad calls me back and apologises for asking me what he could do away. He advises me that there’s probably a bald spot on the alternator and advises me to go to the mechanic to check or replace it, if the car doesn’t start again.
I call the mechanic to book an appointment, and to also get the snow tires off and to buy new rims for the snow tires. The mechanic lets me know that the alternator part is 500$, and an hour of labour so with taxes we’re looking at around 700$
That future appointment next week (we’re going down a highway this weekend which requires snow tires) will cost ~1.5K, assuming we replace the alternator.
I make lunch and sigh.
2:30 PM: The car starts thankfully. I drive incredibly slow. I pick up Spouse by idling the car. We get an email back from a venue saying they cost 75,000$ minimum. The timing is hysterical.
Due to the nature of the dentist, Spouse owes 618$, as they haven’t flipped it under my insurance. They split it in half, as he has a follow up in two weeks. After the next appointment they will flip the whole amount under me and we’ll get reimbursed for the whole amount.
Total 309$/credit card.
3-10 PM: We walk the dog, make dinner (Spouse makes white sauce pasta, with chicken and peas) and watch The Rookie. There are thirteen episodes in season three, and we will be busy every night this week besides Friday and Sunday, and I would like to finish season three so we can start season 4 next Monday. I don’t want to pay for more than one month of Crave. We have five episodes left
Day Two Total: 315.2$
Day Three
1 AM: 100$ is automatically transferred from our account to the credit card debit. We have an auto transfer of 100$/every Tuesday to a Visa where we balance transferred both our cards. We have an offer for 0 interest for 10 months, so we did that for some of the bigger expenses (snow tires, break replacement and general Christmas) and are on track to pay it back within the next 6 months. That visa is our emergency card that we just have in the back end and utilise for promos like this. It allows us to keep our two cards balances manageable and lets us pay in an easier way than taking big chunks out of our various savings.
Total: 100$/direct deposit
5:45-9 AM: Work. Meetings, reports, trying to convince a colleague that the process does include them and refusal to follow it means that their requests won’t be done. Spouse has another half day so I can go into the office at my leisure—if the car starts
9-9:20 AM: The car starts, I get into the office and refresh a data flow before a meeting with a new stake holder. It takes longer to drive into work today because the tourists are starting to come and their van builds or campers are not exactly highway speed and with a two lane highway, if you don’t merge over fast enough you’re stuck.
10:05-10:20 AM: Meeting done, car starts again and I drive home for more meetings. The least amount of time in the office is preferable for me.
10:30-11AM : Meeting with my manager where we discuss future salary and promotion. I am due for a promotion in the start of Q2, which would push me to six figures. I’ll believe it when I see it but, I’m really excited at that possibility for my family.
11:15 AM: Spouse leaves for work, we discuss what groceries are needed, as well if he’ll go to Home Depot tonight to buy more clover seeds for the yard, as we need to reseed before it starts raining. I eat a muffin and my dog and cat decide to try and eat each other.
11:15-1:30 PM: Work runs late. There’s some issues with the data and we can’t figure it out. We call it a night, and I’ll record the video presentations tomorrow, once we fix the data.
1:30-4 PM: Nap time! It’s bad for me, but honestly I don’t sleep well during the night so naps are what keep me alive.
4-6 PM I prep dinner (smash burgers and fries), and get chores done and walk the dog.
6-7:30 PM: Spouse comes home, we eat dinner. Groceries come to 96.83 for two 7 pound pork loins, two packs of bacon, chicken nuggets, coffee, pop, 8 pack of peppers, milk, tomato, pickles, rice, avocado, mushrooms, sour cream and lettuce.
Not too bad, we average about 300$/month in groceries because we can buy bulk and have a second freezer.
For the month of March we are currently at 123.61$ for groceries and there is twelve days left. We went on a small weekend away, so we ate out a fair bit but even then our current food budget is 272.27$ today.
Total: 96.83/ debit
7:30-10 PM: Spouse makes a coffee and plays video games with his friends. They do it every week. I have a shower, fold and put away laundry and read in bed.
Day Three Total: 196.83
Day Four
1AM: Our biweekly accelerated mortgage payment comes out of 1450$. I’m tracking it here to be honest on our spending but I tend not to think of it as money spent because in my head it’s already money gone. To pay for a house equivalent in Vancouver, the mortgage would be over 6k. Renting a two bedroom condo would be 3K. It feels like the mortgage is just cheaper rent, even though each time I own more of my house.
5:45-9 AM: Work. I find out the limits of how many people I can invite to a Teams Meeting as well as that the Thursday before Good Friday is a catholic holiday when a few people ask me to reschedule a training forum for over a thousand people. Sometime in there I make us coffee, make sure Spouse has lunch packed (leftovers). Spouse has walked the dog and has the recycling and compost out for pick up. I drop Spouse off at work.
10-11:45 AM: I leave the office for home and more meetings. I walk the dog and go record training videos. I get an email that Amazon is doing their big spring sale. I send a link to a robot mop and vaccum that’s on a big discount to Spouse. We want one, but I’m not in charge of the research on it. I send links to play grounds to my friends with toddlers
11:45-12:30 PM : I shove lunch in my mouth, last night’s left overs. I’m running late, and decide to get myself later by collecting all the random dishes and mugs that just show up places and start the dishwasher. I get to the lab ten minutes early but need to buy gas on the way home.
I tell my team I’ll be MIA for a bit and leave the work phone in the car.
I buy 15.6L of gas for 30$ at 1.879/l it sucks. I don’t fill up because we’re going to my in laws this weekend and there’s a Costco Gas Bar there.
Total: 30$/credit card
12:30-1:30 PM: Work goes long again.
1:30-2:30 PM: Nap!
2:30-4:30 PM: Walk the dog and drive to the gym. I usually go three times a week but with last week’s weekend away and this week’s weird half days from Spouse, today’s the only day. I make it up by doing both upper and lower body and a 30 minute circuit.
4:30-7:30 PM: I pick up Spouse and we go to Costco. We pick up nachos, ham, cheese buns and some other items. We debate buying our friend’s kid a toddler set of clothes and decide no. We end up buying work pants for Spouse, and a garden hose. It comes out to 116.90
I order our Costco dinner of hot dogs and fries for a grand total date night of 6.41$
Total: 123.31/ credit card
8-9 PM: Dance class! We bought a series of six lessons of introduction to ballroom back in December for a new date night idea. We paid 60$/pp and this is the fifth lesson tonight.
9 pm: We’re home, we let the dog out. Spouse spends an undetermined amount of time watching ballroom videos while I sleep.
Day Four Total: 1603.31$ or 153.31 excluding the mortgage payment.
Day Five
5:45-9 AM: Work. All the meetings. Thursday is the meeting day. I debate with a friend what’s the earliest call we’ve had. 4:30 am still wins. I pack lunch for Spouse and his coffee and he leaves. I end up cleaning up cat puke as the cat decides to drink milk from Spouse’s cereal and vomit it up on camera in a meeting.
9-9:30 AM: I make myself a matcha and walk the dog.
9:30-1 PM: Work and I treat myself to a lunch of a cheese bun and ham sandwhich. We used to eat it every Sunday while growing up but the cost of ham has been outrageous. The deal at Costco yesterday was 1.5$/100 g which is really good.
1-1:30 PM: I seal the wooden deer Christmas decoration we bought last year. It sits outside our front door and needs to be weather proofed, and I’ve been putting it off for five months. But the weather is good and we have newspapers. We have left over wood sealer after the sign we bought a year ago so I use that. The dog and the cat both don’t like my wooden deer.
1:30-4 PM: Nap!
4-5 PM: I basically just watch youtube and drink a root beer. I have no energy.
5-6:30 PM: Spouse comes home, we walk the dog and I make dinner (Kraft Dinner and nuggets–I swear we eat veggies but today is not that day). We discuss the possibility of our dog at our wedding as a flower girl, and if she’ll be in a tutu or a cheongsam like me. I am now researching if they make dog cheongsams and if she can match us. The cat, despite all my heart wanting it, won’t physically be there because he will have an anxiety attack and probably die.
6:30-10:30 PM: Board game night! We go to a friend’s to repeat the same scenario we’ve lost two weeks in a row.
10:30-11 PM: I pack Spouse’s breakfast (oatmeal and frozen berries), lunch (spicy tuna and mayo) since he’s trying to go to the gym before work, and feed the animals before we go to bed.
Day Five Total: 0$
Day Six Friday
5:45-9 AM: Work. I have a deep focus block which means I can get the script for the training I have to run. Public speaking is not my strong suit and it’s a group of a thousand people so I’m not looking forward to it. Spouse almost makes it to the gym. I get an email that my new work phone has shipped. I’m surprised because they wouldn’t order us any for the past four years, but I guess my new iPhone will show up next week. I might give my old work phone to my mother in law, since she smashed the camera on the phone we bought her last year.
9-9:30 AM: I walk the dog, make a matcha and make a todo list for what we have to get done before we leave to my in laws tomorrow. I text my mother in law happy birthday, and hope that she got the card in time. She did.
9:30-11:30 AM: My last meeting for the week ends and I’m debating calling it a day so I can nap. Instead I make lunch (cheese bun and ham), text my other mother in law our plan for Saturday, and unload and reload the dishwasher and go back to work for at least another hour.
12:30-1 PM: I shower and do skin care
1-3 PM: Nap! Somewhere in this time FedEx comes and since I’m sleeping, we have to pick up on Monday. I’m not too sure what it is, I assume it’s our custom address stamp from Etsy because that’s the only thing I’ve bought recently but not too sure. I just realized in retrospect, this might be my new work phone.
3-5 PM: I prep dinner (nachos), unload the dishwasher, pack my overnight bag and confirm all our venue tours by email. I start a load of laundry and do a quick clean. I feel like this is not the best image of our diet. I swear we generally eat healthy but we both have been feeling really blah over the past two weeks so have been going for quick and easy over healthy and balanced. I do have three whole peppers and two whole avocados in the nachos though.
5-7 PM: Spouse comes home, we walk the dog, have dinner, and plan out next week. We have a big Wednesday next week (mechanic, I have a nails appointment, dance class), and we are having our friends over for Easter so we need to prep for that. We pack the car so tomorrow is a very easy start.
Spouse also gets paid today. We’re lucky that we’re on alternating pay periods, we used to be on the same and it always felt stressful. Spouse also lets me know his union has secured a 3% cost of living raise to start in Q3. I really like his union for negotiating a base 2% year of cost of living raise, with potential addition raises depending on inflation. It’s a bit away but that’s still good news.
7:30-10:30 PM: We finish The Rookie Season 3 and head to bed. Crave reminds me that I have 10 days until I’m charged again. Sadly, I think we’ll have to pay for 2 months.
Day Six Total: 0
Day Seven Saturday
8:30-9:30 AM: Wake up. No one (except the dog) slept well so we’re not in a morning mood. Spouse makes coffee and walks the dog, while I finish packing the car and give the cat a lot of attention. Our first venue tour is at 11 and the one that is the most expensive (8-10K), but also the one we probably want the most. We live about an hour away but the highway is two lanes and one accident can back everything up for hours.
10:40-1 PM: We visit our dream venue. We stay way longer than expected. Basically if the quote is under 10K, we’ll get it. Just waiting now.
1-2 PM: We get to our in-laws and have a lunch of egg salad sandwhichs. We need to buy gas. My in laws drive us to a pottery painting store.
2-4 PM: We paint pottery. My mother in law only wanted to do this for her birthday. They’ll pick it up in a week after it’s been thrown. I paint a vase (28$), Spouse paints an Easter egg (18$), father in law paints a mug (30$), and mother in law paints a plate (50$)
Total:143.36/credit card
4-5 Pm: We see another venue. It’s an instant no. My in laws decide they want to try Korean fried chicken. We call ahead for take out to get two fries and 16 pieces of half and half. It comes to 50.83$ that my in laws pay for.
5-10 PM: We come back and see that our dog has pooped in their house and also has gotten into their pantry and eaten an entire bag of dog food. It is not a fun night.
We spend the night drinking wine and discussing the wedding and watching TV.
10PM: We go to bed. That’s the end of this week, but tomorrow we will be buying gas and probably lunch for my other mother in law as we will be touring another venue.
Day Seven Total: 143.36$

Forgive me for the initial ambiguity. I am not certain how to proceed, I just know that I have been given the green light to share this initial post. Take it for what it is:
Far too many are spending too much time and energy trying to solve a problem they don’t even have the right set of integers. It is quite literally impossible. Have you not ever wondered why great researchers who spend thousands of hours cannot land on anything concrete ?
Men and women have dedicated their life to figuring out the connections between the anomalous, to ultimately give up, or they ran out of time on this mortal coil. God forbid someone stumble onto the truth, and then conveniently get suicided. All of this connected, and really that is the point: Connection.
Currently, our government has spent trillions to solve this problem and to figure out who they are in bed with, and still they are in the dark. But many of them are okay with that as long as their pockets keep filling. See, for the Problem, existing in the shadows is their identity. The Problem excels in confusion and chaos. In drawing someone in just enough to keep them digging, but then driving them mad by having them feel around in the dark.
It is like Humanity is in a dark room. A big room, like a warehouse. And we are in the pitch black trying to find the light switch. Only, when someone gets too close, they either get turned the other direction, get tripped up, get locked up, or get gone. All the while, a few have on night vision goggles and orchestrate all the aimless wondering. Every once in a while, the searcher will stumble across a technology that pushes them towards the light switch, to then be thrown off course and continue to walk around aimlessly. In the pitch black, when someone “discovers” something, the others wondering around will begin to flock to that glimmer, to then be sidelined once again because the Problem loves to move large numbers of people towards an objective. It is a frustrating process and one that will continue until the lights are turned on.
However, many of our best and brightest have been co-opted to keep anyone and everyone from knowing the truth. They have falsely believed that those who desire to bring them to ruin are their allies. Over the years, many have woken up to the idea that maybe these NHI ‘friendlies’ aren’t friendly after all. Others have been so enthralled with the ‘gifts’ given to humanity, that they dismiss the possibility of these NHI’s are anything but benevolent.
Many of these “gifts” are found. In fact, all of the originals were found. How does that make sense? Pretend you are having an Easter egg hunt (not religiously speaking), and it is a grand ole time. Fast forward 5 days and you are out in the yard cutting the grass and you see a glimmer in the grass. Turns out, even though 5 days have passed, that egg is sitting where you left it. This is a very simple way of looking at it, but this is how the retrieval process began.
Many days (or ages) ago, objects were lost. Today, because of they know where the eggs are hidden, they can lead people to discover. Once discovered, the craft were studied and used to further our existence. Nowadays, the craft could be old that we discover, or it could be craft that are actually man-made, under the tutelage of NHI. The NHI can not easily manufacture in our dimension, so they tap the humans that best serve their purpose.
This can happen within an entity like the Armed Forces or a part of the Military Industrial Complex. This can also be done through organizations that we don’t readily know the name of, for example, have you ever heard of the Sonora Aero Club? Most have not, however, in the United States, this group was one of the first to be co-opted for a mission that they had no clue they were on. It makes me nervous to even write this, but we must try to find some semblance of light if we are going to make it out of this warehouse in one piece.
Men like David Grusch are diligent in their search, however, they will never be able to put the pieces together until they back up enough to see the Problem. Until it is diagnosed, we will look at pieces of a puzzle without having the box as a reference picture. The pieces of the puzzle: UAP, NHI, cattle mutilations, paranormal, etc etc, can’t be looked at as different problems—— they are the Problem.
There are entirely too many components for us to break down each in one post, but please just suspend skepticism for a minute and read this last part as if it were true:
There is an underlying glue to all things. A thread that ties us all together. In other dimensions (for lack of a better word), this thread can be woven together by groups of people having a similar idea, ideology intention, hope, fear, or sadness. Each individual thread, being part of the whole, is assembled into whatever dominates that person’s mind at that juncture. I know this sounds wild, but just imagine. Therefore, a group can be woven into a blanket that provides warmth and safety, or into a noose which could spell the end to all things. The Problem’s agenda is the latter. However, the people that are part of the Problem believe that they are making a blanket. This is why it is so hard to get people to see it for what it is: because it would mean humbling yourself and realizing that you have actually been working in the noose factory. Few people can admit their folly. Even fewer people can see they are part of the Problem because their pockets are stuffed or their power is enormous. The Problem is not stupid nor lazy, it will give you anything and everything it can to reel you in, because when the day comes, you will be tapped to do something you don’t want to do, but you must. That is part of being in bed with them, they control you.
That is all I have in me currently to share. I know that people will roll eyes, scratch heads, or dismiss completely. I am okay with that. I am not trying to sell you anything, just report on what I know to be true. I may share again, but I will answer questions best I know how. I leave you with 2 quotes:
“We’ll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the US public believes is false” -CIA Director, William J Casey, 1981
“The last card is the alien card. They will build space-based weapons against aliens, and it is all a lie.” -Werner Von Braun, 1974-1977
PS- if you ask about specific anomalies, ie. crop circles, I may only have a theory as to "why" because I don't have information on everything. But it is ALL part of ONE problem.

For a bit of back story, my older sister hasnt really been a part of the family. She has been in boarding schools from middle school till uni and only stays a while to visit. I guess this whole family concept is new to her. She used to be the best older sister. I would always brag to my friends about how preety and smart she is even though ive had some horrible experiences with her. She recently graduated uni and is back at home she is looking for a scolarship in Tokyo for her master's ( that I really hope she gets)
My little sister is really wise and calm for an 11 year old but she also has her complaints about her. My older sister tends to ignore people and then pretend to be nice, valuable or a 'saviour' by baking, cooking and cleaning around. She also pretends to be this really smart person and interrupts laughs or makes rude remarks when trying to prove your point in a debate. I have ADHD which is frustrating for my clean freak little sister that i share a room with as i tend to forget things she asked me to do or leave random things all over the room jumping from task to task. My sister and I always bicker but end up making up and I truly put in effort to keep the room clean. On one of these bickering moments my oldersister came into the room and imediatly took her side and ignored anything i had to say and would directly talk to her like im not in the room "Dont worry just ignore her, we all know she doesnt care about anyone" which makes completly no sense at all but whatever.
Im really smart and everyone knows that biology is a subject I'm good at so when my mum was talking about something and i was explaining it to her from a biological stand I was confused to see her mocking and laughing at me and looking at my little sister who was just as stunned as I was. We got into a debate about whether smoking causes cancer or not and i said that it doesnt but has a correlation to which she indirectly said that I'm 'young and stupid' and we aren't here to argue 'semantics' She then went on to use 'big words' in hopes to make me feel dumb but failed terribly. she asked me if i knew what a certain chemical compound was and when I said no she just went completely out of control with her rude attitude and when i confronted her, she just said that "being rude is the only thing that works with me" I, later on, asked my dad who has a high IQ and is super good at all sciences what that compound is and he had no Idea.
My mom recently bought everyone chocolate. I kept mine in my bag but decided to keep it in the fridge a couple days later. both my sisters had eatten their bars so i was surprised to see that my bar was also missing. Im not a fan of the brand and would have let her eat it if she had asked me. I asked my younger sister if she ate it and she said no, my parents dont like sugar which only leaves her in the home. I found out later that she told my mum I ate mine and some of hers, she is really good at manipulating my mother. I also saw her take my earbuds and use them, I asked her if those were mine to which she replied "I dont know what ur talking about" and then put them on and blasted music. I told her I would appreciate if she asked before using my stuff to which she replied "I dont know what ur talking about" and smirked
The next day I took a chocolate she had gotten for herself and hid it. When she asked me where it was i told her i dint know what she was talking about to which she responded to saying stuff under her breath. He had had a physical fight when i was around 13 and she did some damage there but knew not to mess with me now as im bigger and stronger than she is. she complained to our mum saying that money should be deducted from my pockets. I let her believe i ate her chocolate for an hour to let her know how i feel about her taking my things without my permission then i placed her chocolate on the kitchen counter and accidentally knocked yogurt she put in the freezer and promptly cleaned it up. she saw the spilled yogurt and was jeering at me and flinging all sorts of insults. I didn't care and camly cleaned up the mess. I guess she saw the chocolate because its missing from the counter and people in this house dont just take things that dont belong to them.
I'm starting to seriously not like my sister and I dont know what to do about it. she's not all bad but for a 22-year-old.. this is completely unacceptable. there was a time she decided to go vegan and would call the food in the fridge a "grave yard" when i tried to fry an egg she made a disgusted face and called it "chicken period" she also called any kind of meat "corpses" Im guessing she has grown a little from then but ill never forget that easter break she came over. If you ask her about this she will tell you that she would never say 'such a thing' and that 'the human brain creates false memories' and so thats what i must be going through.
I dont want to dislike her because she is family and i have alot of good memories with her but I also will not tolerate nonsense. AITAH for not liking my sister? or hiding her chocolate? I feel bad "playing God" and making her learn a lesson.

i am so concerned upon reading a recent post in here. to anyone who currently has honey, caramel, chocolate, etc. on top of their espresso machine; PLEASE make sure it is on/in a tray, cup, bowl, whatever is not going to trap heat from escaping and also big enough to catch when the tops blow off your ghira***** caramel bottles and run down the sides.
barista AND espresso machine technician speaking - be very careful with your expensive ass machines please please please. know what backflushing is, do it every close, and learn when and how to change your gaskets and screens. make sure EVERYONE is wiping and purging the steam wands EVERY TIME. the machines are literally just sweet little babies and they get treated so poorly. they are also ridiculously expensive :)
AND STOP USING YOUR TAMP TO HIT THE PORTAFILTER TO LEVEL THE GROUNDS. LOOK AT THE POOR PORTAFILTER. IT DID NOT HAVE THOSE MARKS BEFORE •••• you ••••
silly goofy rant aside, repairs for the long term damage these things cause is ridiculously expensive and slow. with no purging, boilers will get “skunked” from milk going up the steam wand and need a complete empty and clean to get the curdled milk out. steam wands will need to be taken apart and completely rebuilt. your portafilters are going to start marking the inside of your groupheads that will start leaking during shot pulls because they are not fitting as designed anymore.
if your coffee place owner is not behind daily backflushing find out the cost of a grouphead rebuild at a place near you and show them. or if they wont wipe the wand a boiler flush and steam wand rebuilds. a complete detailing. idk i just want you to protect these really cool things that are so precisely designed to move with the only intention to brew a really delicious moment to share, an opportunity to connect with someone and share energy and make someone’s day. and obvi save money (and give me time to refurbish some old really cool machines!)
gross work stories bc of things baristas and/or owners did time! and warning. ⚠️ the fried skeleton of a mouse jaw still stuck on a wire, feet stuck in chocolate originally on top of the machine, overheated, burst, melted and left for weeks inside a machine (which is why the mouse was residing in there) has happened. roaches inside 2/3rds of the automatic espresso machines. more than one client then put it in the freezer, which burst every valve, both boilers, most fittings and connections, plus my patience. a marzocco with no water flow from all 3 groups. the cause? no backflushing ever owning the machine, but one round of cafiza? chunks. pried the screen out with a knife and pliers and had to gut the gasket in chunks. baristas not purging the wand? whole machine smelling like curdled milk and not even being able to make espresso because it comes out smelling and “tasting” like bad milk. (in quotes bc i personally did not try it and say that.) steam wands not spraying, needing bent off with pliers, to find it won’t just spin off because there is rotten hardened milk all the way up the temperature probe blocking and pressing in and out of every possible place it could get to. i will make a separate post at some point about everything crazy and gross that has happened, but mainly just a straightforward guide on how to take care of your machine and the full bloopers of what happens when you don’t. i can add pics.
thank you. love u. good night.

Me M/21 and her F/21 met lately last year in December after I had finally gotten a job I've wanted within my college at the school gym. I had seen her around quote a bit before and thought she was very kind and pretty but I didn't know her and hadn't found the confidence in myself to talk to her. After getting this position, I found myself around her more, talking to her more and eventually we both knew we had an interest in each other. I asked her for her number and if she wanted to hangout (go on a date) and she was all about it. We went on a date, had a great time and the next morning I was hit with a "I think it's better that we just stay friends." While I was ok with this and was ready to move on, I get a text from her a month later just saying "hey, how was your day?" At first I didn't think anything of it but as time went on I could tell she liked talking to me a lot. This went on for another month and so I asked if she wanted to hangout sometime again, and she was down to do so. Something flipped within a 24 hour period where she was dodging hanging out and didn't seem interested anymore. Eventually she stopped talking to me and then found out she had started seeing another guy. I was really confused, and annoyed and just felt stabbed in the back, even if that wasn't really the case. I figured she just liked me for attention, so from then on I just focused on myself, work, school and friends. Eventually (a few months later) I found out she wasn't even dating this guy at all and that he hadn't treated her well towards the end. Me being me, I told myself that I really didn't want to regret not trying with this girl one last time and putting everything I had left into it, because I knew if I didn't then I would kick myself over it. So I tried again, we talked a bunch, hungout a few times and eventually I ask her out on a real date. Right after I asked her I could tell she wasn't interested in a date and kind of regretted it. I was then told by a homie (boyfriend of her bestfriend) that he overheard her say that she likes that I'm persistent but isn't interested. Later on the next day (Easter) I get a text saying "Can I ask why you are so persistent on things between us?" And I responded with "I truly value you as a person and I see something with us, and when I truly value a person I have a hard time letting them go. But I don't want to make you uncomfortable, that's the last thing I want to do." I get no text the rest of the night and in the morning when I see her at work, she doesn't mention it whatsoever. It had been bugging me so I brought it up and low and behold she says the same thing as before. "I tried dating and it's just not something I wanna do right now." I hear that and I'm ready to be her friend but she gives me this hot and cold approach and i never know what to do. Now I think about her all the time and that maybe there's a chance in the future when I shouldn't be thinking this at all. I wanna move on but can't, I wanna be able to date and see other people but I feel like I'm making myself unavailable in case she comes back. It's unhealthy, especially with a girl I never dated, but since I work with her I gotta see her everyday and as I get to know her more, I realize how much we have in common (politics, music taste, points of view, interests) but I can't share any of it with her and it's eating me alive.
I guess I mainly want help on how to deal with it? If anyone has some advice or similar experiences I'd love to hear them. Thank you for reading

Edit: If you are going to comment on the length of this post, please don't. This is not a simple snark but rather an actual critical think piece about feminism and Taylor Swift.

Introduction

Pertaining to Taylor Swift, "Female Rage" has deviated from its intended meaning after Swift debuted a new performance of The Tortured Poets Department during the Eras Tour. Now, according to Swift's use of the phrase, female rage is interpreted as public backlash against Swift's dating choices rather than as a response to the broader injustices against women and women's rights. This post examines Taylor Swift's flawed feminism, philanthropy, branding, and the controversial trademark petition for the phrase "Female Rage: The Musical". Swift's background as an entertainer, indeterminate politics, and alignment with capitalism over feminism pervades her legacy, again threatening her public tolerance as not just an individual but as a brand.

Once Upon a Female Rage...

If you were cognizant in the early 2010's, you've heard countless jabs at Taylor Swift in the media. Magazines, radio, or online. Music critics did not take her seriously as a songwriter; parents put a woman on an unrealistic pedestal as the ideal role model for their children; she dated too much and used men as lyrical fodder. No matter the story, it inevitably spread, conjoined with everyone's respective opinions, and you'd be left to wonder, "Why does everyone hate this girl so much?"
Taylor's target demographic has always been young or adolescent girls, more so when Swift herself was one. She made music that spoke to the awkward misfit, cultivating a para-social relationship with fans on MySpace, then later twitter, Instagram, and YouTube, where Taylor posted relatable vlogs showcasing the life of a homegrown American girl. Taylor had a delayed public "growing up" and, compared to her female pop contemporaries, Swift never "gratuitously sexualized her image and seems pathologically averse to controversy" (and, apparently, never even had a sip of alcohol until she turned 21). She was more than happy to spin this narrative to allude to an inherent moral superiority above other women in the industry (Better Than Revenge, heard of it?), engaging in the very slut-shaming that she herself endured (the Madonna and Whore archetypes). The victim complex arose with the need to prove Taylor as a different type of pop girl. Based upon her holy and clean image, Swift had been dubbed "a feminist's nightmare", and that "[To Swift] other girls are obstacles; undeserving enemies who steal Taylor’s soulmates with their bewitching good looks and sexual availability." Feminism and Tennessee-Christian country values don't exactly mix, it seems.
Years later, Swift befriended Lena Dunham and thus experienced white feminism osmosis, where Dunham taught Swift that real feminists defend rapists, makes insensitive jokes about rape and abortion, and prioritize all-white casts. Swift then declared herself a feminist in 2014, saying,

"Becoming friends with Lena – without her preaching to me, but just seeing why she believes what she believes, why she says what she says, why she stands for what she stands for – has made me realize that I’ve been taking a feminist stance without actually saying so."

I suppose the male-centric songwriting subject that permeates Swift's discography contained covert feminism and that we just didn't see that. Perhaps, the "Bad Blood" song and music video were written only in jest and not about poor Katy Perry, for Swift, as a feminist, would "never make it a girl fight" or tear other women down (though all Katy did was date your terrible ex-boyfriend and allegedly steal three backup dancers from your tour). In 2013, Swift said, in response to Tina Fey and Amy Poehler's joke towards her serial dating, "There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women."
There was that time in 2015 Taylor said that Nicki Minaj was "invited to any stage [she is] on" (as if Taylor expects to have access to every stage, award, and platform that Nicki might not otherwise have as a black female artist...yikes!) in response to Nicki's criticism of the white + thin VMA nominations. Later, Nicki responded with confusion, as Swift continued, "It’s unlike you to pit women against each other. Maybe one of the men took your slot..". Of course, this 'beef' was 'squashed' when Nicki performed with Taylor at the VMAs, with Nicki quite literally only having 38 seconds of stage time without Taylor. Maybe all that parading around with a legion of famous white women - similar to the way Taylor might've done with her numerous 1989-era handbags - was in fact a stance against gender inequality, and that this display of "girl power" should be enough to constitute Swift as a feminist icon.
Even while Swift says that Dunham informed her feminist outlook, she dances around the exact contents of those beliefs: "what she believes, what she says, what she stands for" is not exactly insightful towards what beliefs Swift might have inherited. Taylor never broaches women's rights topics such femicide, FGM, forced pregnancy & marriage, sex trafficking, women in slavery, women's financial and political oppression, women's educational rights, women's health, or women's autonomy, so we can assume she only gives a fuck about "girls supporting girls" (whatever that fucking means).
Despite some questionable (and sometimes vindictive) behavior, Taylor as a young woman did not deserve every media lashing that she received. We cannot deny that most headlines and criticisms perpetuated a misogynistic rhetoric which has plagued Swift for a majority of her career. Acknowledging events such as the development of her ED, her sexual assault trial, "Famous" lyric and MV depiction of Taylor, and the explicit Twitter deepfakes, for example, as both disgusting and unfortunate things that happened to a young woman in Hollywood does not negate the fact that Taylor is mostly a performative feminist.

Get Your Fucking Ass Up and Be a Philanthropist, It Seems Like Nobody Wants to Be a Philanthropist These Days

In 2013, Taylor Swift cut the ribbon at the grand opening of the Taylor Swift Education Center at the Country Music Hall of Fame in Nashville, Tennessee. The donation amount - $4 million - was the largest individual artist gift ever donated to the Country Music Hall of Fame, which is, of course, mentioned on Swift's website. The two-story facility features three classrooms, an instrument room, and an interactive children's exhibit gallery. Swift also performed at "All for the Hall" charity shows and has donated numerous artifacts from her career (such as notable guitars, tour costumes, etc) to the museum.
This was over 11 years ago, and it is still the only notable philanthropic contribution Taylor Swift has made.
For a woman of her net worth and stature, and a woman who recognizes the difficulties for women in film and music, you would think that Taylor Swift might establish a scholarship program for women to study the arts or something. Perhaps Swift might even consider becoming a member of organizations that support female artists, or one that supports LGBTQ+ causes (since she is now proudly an ally), yet she remains superficial with her graces. Broader philanthropy, such as donating relief aid to Palestinian women or women impacted by violence and discrimination will probably never receive any financial support from Miss Swift because then she'd be using her money towards philanthropies involving anyone but white entertainers.
She even says herself in Miss Americana, "My entire moral code as a kid and now is a need to be thought of as 'good'." Well, she's certainly thought of as good, though her actions say otherwise. She's more than happy to do a vaguely altruistic song and dance for a clip-worthy interview quote and mass appeasement, then fuck off to one of her mansions on a 20 minute private jet flight, rather than actually contribute to anything pertaining to the causes she has endorsed. Yet, far too many people continue to give a woman such as her their money, time, and energy, and she hoards these resources to herself.

I Like Some of the Taylor's Songs, But What the Fuck Does She Know About Feminism?

Swift continued with her self-proclaimed feminist campaign, positioning herself as a political activist and LGBTQ+ ally in the Miss Americana documentary. The primary focus of the documentary consists of the sexual assault trial, Andrea Swift's cancer diagnosis, Taylor's ED and body dysmorphia, media scrutiny, and, largely, finally speaking up about her politics publicly, mostly her opposition to the 2018 Tennessee Republican senate candidate, Marsha Blackburn, and Blackburn's beliefs. Swift says, following a scene discussing her experience during the trial,

"I just couldn't really stop thinking about it. And I just thought to myself, next time there is any opportunity to change anything, you had better know what you stand for and what you want to say."

We must ask ourselves, though: when has Swift ever spoken up to change anything? Okay, pulling her entire catalogue from Spotify because they didn't pay their artists enough and similarly pulling her catalogue from Apple Music are changes that she leveraged due to her revenue potential and power, but they are not pertinent to the average woman's rights. Moreover, these are issues that directly impacted Taylor's income, which was enough reason for her to protest in the first place. Swift has sold the most units for a female artist in first week sales, is the first female artist with 100k monthly Spotify listeners, is the first female artist to win the Album of the Year Grammy 4 times, and is the first female artist to do X, Y, and Z, all while being inoffensive and family-friendly to boot. The actual Taylor Swift seems unwilling to compromise the brand of Taylor Swift by contributing in meaningful ways to feminist causes, especially if it is for women outside of America and Hollywood.
The reason political anthems such as "The Man" and "Only the Young" of the Lover era feel disingenuous and corporate is because, well, it is. Taylor has taken every opportunity to advance her career or public image at the expense of other women. What is truly genuine to Taylor's outlook on other women is vying for male attention, taking down female competition, and vocalizing feminist injustices only if they directly impact her and her money. Some will argue that it's satisfactory for a woman with such a huge platform to even TALK about feminism, but that just isn't enough. It's even less impressive when you candidly look at the scope of her feminist lens: "If I was the man, then I'd be THE MAN", or "I really resent the ‘Be careful, buddy, she’s going to write a song about you’ angle, because it trivialises what I do", and, of course, "We all got crowns". Feminism, but only when it happens to me. It gets worse when you look at Taylor's track record of copying other famous women and removing other female artists as potential threats to her pop prowess.
It's good for PR to align yourself with certain blanket feminist and political beliefs, therefore good for branding, therefore good for ticketing and merchandise sales, therefore good for business. And Taylor Swift is a business.
She's not a feminist. Taylor Swift is a capitalist.

I Can't Pay Those Sweatshop Workers a Livable Wage or Benefits! How Else Would I Make My Billions?

Recently, Taylor's team filed to trademark the phrase "Female Rage: The Musical" after Taylor said during Paris N1 of the Eras Tour,

"So you were the first ones to see The Tortured Poets at the Eras Tour...or as I like to call it, 'Female Rage: The Musical'."

This trademark petition was filed last week on Saturday, and news comes about just as numerous unofficial fan-made merch designs have cropped up with this phrase plastered on Fruit of the Loom basics. I'm of the opinion Swift's team motioned for a trademark so that they can send out cease & desists to all those that make knockoff merch, which disrupts potential sales for Bravado, UMG's choice merchandising company; however, since it was filed earlier, perhaps Swift has bigger plans with the bizarre use of the gendered phrase. One Swiftie referred to the phrase "female rage" as "a funny Eras Tour joke". Could it be a possible fourth version of the Eras Tour Movie? Whatever the reason, the motion to capitalize off of such a concept is disgusting, but not unsurprising, for a woman that profits on her vain feminism.
Swift, through her company, TAS Rights Managements, has also trademarked over 200 phrases, including "1989", where she owns the property rights to this calendar year on keychains, phone cases, sunglasses, stationary, bags, beverage ware, clothing, entertainment services, your subconscious, and, of course, Christmas ornaments.
The vapid consumerism in Swiftie culture is, frankly, disgusting. Bravado's sustainability statement is non-existent, the quality control is abysmal, and the materials they use are horrible. The materials, such as acrylic and polyester, are made from petrochemicals. This means they are non-renewable, shed microplastics, and are quite toxic in production. The manufacturing process to make all of those lazy-rushed Eras Tour logo graphic tees is a huge blow to environmental well-being. Apparently, though, Swifties don't give a fuck. They sell out products in seconds and either have to face the manufactured scarcity or buy from a scalper that resells for 200% of the already ridiculous retail price. This doesn't include the environmental impact of vinyl records, CD, and cassette production, of which Taylor produces many variants that sell unsustainable amounts.
If we're talking about women's rights violations, why is no one acknowledging the women that work in the inhumane sweatshop conditions that have to pump out fugly t-shirts and hats? The millions of plastic microfiber dander they are inhaling, or the toxic dyes that touch their bare skin? Are they being compensated fairly for their skilled labour and are they in safe working environments? Do these women have minimal bargaining power, and do they have authority over their worker's rights? Is Taylor Swift female raging at their injustices? Does Taylor Swift ever feels bad that her wealth was built on the backs of women of color, disadvantaged by the demands of the global economy and garment industry? Do you think she ever says a little white feminist prayer for them before she goes to sleep at night?
What's even crazier is not that Taylor herself doesn't care, it's that Swifties don't care. There CANNOT BE ethical billionaires. You only make a billion dollars if you are exploiting other human beings for capital gain. Based on public perception of the possible "Female Rage: The Musical" trademark, it seems like Swifties are already asking for merch with this phrase. "If Taylor made it, I'd buy it." Oh, cool. So not only do you champion Miss Swift's avarice and billionaire status, but you also are unashamed to admit to your blind consumption of her music and merchandise, no matter where they might originate in production or sincerity. Just as Swift takes and takes and takes, Swifties' consumerism of Taylor Swift cannot be quelled.
The tortured artist's most vulnerable and sincere poetry...available now in 21 different versions!

I Am Tortured Poet, Hear Me Whinge

Look - even if Taylor's intention is to characterize TTPD as more "tortured" and "angry", the main thread of the album is "I was ghosted by my decade-long situationship with a controversial indie boy and my fucking stupid fans wrote a 'Speak Up Now' open letter prompting me to drop him" anger, which is adequately expressed in the lyrics and performances. The extent of Taylor's "female rage" on TTPD is on tracks such as "Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?", which contends with relentless media scrutiny; "But Daddy I Love Him", where Swift firmly states she'll date whoever she likes no matter how "Sarahs and Hannahs" may react; and "The Albatross", a track mythologizing her reputation and the consequences of dating her. Of course, these coincide with deep psychological wounds that formed during Swift's early years in the media, and so, from her feminist perspective, these subjects tackle the misogyny and double standards that she faced.
Yet Taylor Swift still has no grounds to be claiming that TTPD best exemplifies female rage and therefore she, in the context of this album, is female rage incarnate. As the daughter of a stock broker and mutual fund marketing executive, Taylor was born into wealth and allowed privileges like trips and subsequent relocation to Nashville all so that she might get a record deal. Her father even invested at least $120,000 into the then-fledgling label, Big Machine Records, which ensured Taylor's place with Borchetta after leaving her dead-end development deal with Sony. The fact that her parents were able to buy her a fucking brand new guitar for Christmas and pay for music lessons says so much about the financial security and safety of her childhood.
Money is privilege and protection, and despite Swift's experiences with misogyny and loser boyfriends, she does not know what female rage is.
Her rage is derived from her frustrations with her obsessive fans pulling the moral superiority card on Taylor in response to her rebound with Matty Healy. That's literally it. She's just pissed that the monster she created is no longer obediant, it's become a feral, sovereign entity that depletes the world of its natural resources and thinks it is more intelligent than it actually is because it's mommy has started to talk to it with big words. Apparently, 'illicit', 'elegy', 'nonchalant', and 'precocious' are considerably big words for the oafish monster, and I find it strange that this level of literacy is present in a group of fans that allegedly have GPAs of 3.5 or higher, but I digress.
Taylor Swift has never been one paycheck away from destitution. Taylor Swift has never experienced racial discrimination. She may have instances of gender discrimination, but she possesses the ideal white, blonde American beauty standard and therefore reaps the benefits of being a conventionally attractive woman. Taylor Swift has sufficient social capital. Taylor Swift is a billionaire woman prolonging her victimhood though she, as a woman, has mostly had control over her image and music (unlike her contemporaries). Taylor Swift is NOT entitled to be championed for her "female rage", nor should she be. Taylor Swift has never even been the struggling artist, for fuck's sake. I don't give a fuck if she's trying to fill the empty lunch tables of her past. Taylor Swift purporting herself, her unpolished album, and her lukewarm feminism as a musical bleeding with female rage is asinine.

Sigh Try and Come For My Job, Poors

Out there in the world right now is a 23-year-old woman, a recent college grad, who works as a barista. She has to wake up and get ready to go into a minimum wage job because she cannot get a job in her field. She doesn't have healthcare benefits or sick time, so she has to go into work no matter how she's feeling. All day long she is berated by vicious customers and creepy men, and, exhausted from being on her feet, she knows she has to go home to her shitty roommate that never does the dishes and her roommate's shitty dog. To comfort herself, she considers getting a treat, but thinks against it when she remembers that matcha lattes cost $15 and they taste like milky dirt. She knows that she needs to buy groceries this week, and so the woman resolves to go home, but notices that her gas tank is low. She goes to put gas in the car, but the pump stops at $27.86 because that's all that she has in her checking account. The woman, bereft and reeling, sinks into the driver's seat. "Well," she thinks, her head in her hands, "at least I don't have Taylor Swift's job. I just couldn't imagine."
Fame is somewhat of a choice. If at any moment Taylor feels that she is misunderstood, misconstrued, or overwhelmed by public opinion, she can LEAVE the public eye - Lord knows she has the retirement fund and residuals to do so. In "I Can Do It With a Broken Heart", the TTPD song about meeting the demands of your career-zenith mega-tour while in the relationship trenches, Taylor ends the song by rambling,

"You know you're good when you can even do it with a broken heart...you know you're good...and I'm good, cause I'm miserable, and no one even knows!...try and come for my job."

Yeah, obviously we wouldn't know, you recently passed the billionaire threshold and are the most famous and in-demand performer in the world right now. Taylor Swift makes an estimated $10 to $13 million dollars A NIGHT on the Eras Tour. Furthermore, the Eras Tour movie grossed $261.6 million globally, (which, as the producer, Taylor takes home 57% of the ticket sales) not counting the streaming revenue from Amazon Prime Video and the estimated $75 million deal that Disney paid to have it on Disney+. We're not even considering the income from cheap plastic popcorn buckets and drink cups plastered with colored squares in her Era-specific likeness.
It's funny. Taylor Swift often said that being famous wasn't hard, that she "isn't complaining". I'm sure it is difficult to always have to present in a good mood, else you'll end up misrepresented in the media, and I'm sure it's invasive to virtually have no privacy or semblance of anonymity. Still, Taylor Swift shows up each night of tour and performs. For a majority of her career, she has penned her sad songs while on the road. Most of "Red", her breakup album, was written in the thick of the Speak Now World tour. Now, some Swifties say they almost "feel bad" for attending the Eras Tour with Swift's revelations in this song, that they have had a 'dimmed experience' upon hearing Taylor's misery whilst performing. Despite the fact that Taylor said that "this was the happiest she's ever been" at Gilette Stadium in May, the lyrics "boohoo, woe is me, smile for the cameras and make the fans happy!!!" are jarring for Eras attendees.
While Taylor Swift was making double-digit millions a night in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil and feeling miserable, Ana Clara Benevides Machado passed away due to heat exposure. The concert promoters, Time For Fun, are now the subject of a criminal investigation due to their lack of adequate hydration and safety. Taylor Swift cancelled the Sunday show that was to follow and offered VIP tent tickets to Benevides Marchado's family, which was a kind gesture, but perhaps incongruous to the incident of which they were offered as consolation. Everyone grieves differently, of course, but I'm not sure attending the very show at the very same venue that my daughter or sister passed away in two days prior, where the singer CONTINUED the show despite her death, would be healthy for closure.
There was no female rage at the show as Swift never saw Benevides Machado pass out. There was no female rage towards the disregard for fans as humans while Swift elected to proceed with her Brazil tour dates despite the country being in historic heatwaves (at risk of overheatting herself). If Taylor Swift was so shaken by touring with a broken heart or a fan's passing, she wouldn't have added an additional North American leg of Eras just two months after the Matty breakup. She's brokenhearted but willing to mend the cracks with your money and move onward with her worldwide female rage induced pillaging.
No matter what happens, even if you die at a Taylor Swift concert, Taylor collects a big fat check and flies away. She doesn't know you as anything other than a conversion rate or earning potential despite what her nearly 20-year long parasocial relationship with fans might otherwise indicate. She knows that, while some Swifties are without disposable income, they feel obligated to spend on a "48 Hours Only!" exclusive vinyl variant instead of necessities because they are so entrenched in Taylor Swift's intoxicating celebrity, they'll prioritize materialistic fandom before their needs. This is good enough for her because this means she can expand her real estate portfolio and finance her cat's lavish lifestyles. They're worth an estimated $100 million dollars. Her three cats could pool their net worth and solve world hunger.
While you and I might be denied bereavement leave and barely surviving the current political and economic climate, Taylor Swift has to, instead of gets to, perform for stadiums at full attendance for three nights in a row across the globe. You and I might be replaced by AI at our longtime jobs, but Taylor Swift is threatened with losing more and more money each time you listen to a "Stolen Version" of her songs. If we don't buy every variant of all of her albums, then who is going to pay for the fucking cats?
It is tone deaf to spend as she spends and lives as she lives in this economy, but this is her reality. She was able to donate $100,000 to all of her tour truck drivers, and that's wonderful, but it leads me to wonder about the ethos of the 2020s where one woman can hoard such life-changing amounts of money. Remember in 2014 when she gave a fan $90 ($120 in today's money) to get Chipotle because she had no fucking clue how much it cost? This is a 34-year-old woman who is increasingly out of touch with the reality for working class people and women in general. Normal everyday adults must wake up and go to their thankless jobs, and yet Taylor Swift, despite all her riches, incessantly references the lows of her life and career as a public figure and entertainer to farm sympathy and drive sales. And still, the corporate women have latched onto "I cry a lot, but I am so productive! It's an art!" as their cubicle battle cry.
Do you think that, from up in her private jet, Taylor Swift gazes at the world through her poetic, tortured eyes, and thinks, "All the little people, in their cars, walking, going about their lives...all those girls that don't support girls...do they know that I've made an album about female rage?"

Conclusion/TLDR

Thank you for reading. I would love to hear your critical insights towards this entire ordeal: TTPD, the trademark, the implications of it all.
TLDR: Taylor Swift is a bad feminist and is delusional to think that the TTPD eras set exemplifies female rage at women's injustice.