WPA – A Completely Average Roadtrip
Disclaimer: Not canon, and I don’t use patreon so please don’t spoil me. Also, any opinion held by a character is that of the characters and not my own. Enjoy.
Town of Ljosalfington, local time 14:00, week 7
Emma Booker
“Again Illunor, I warned you before that this is a utility vehicle, not a party rated smart-limo. I am already compromising more than I should by allowing you to use the sample cooler as a minifridge, one which I can’t even use!” I said as I loaded the materials I had just purchased into the back of the high-G All terrain fusion-ethanol-electric hybrid 24th-century legacy pickup truck that I had printed out earlier this week, carefully avoiding the heavy ordinance hard point.
“That is hardly an excuse for that abysmally cramped leg space barely fit for cattle, never mind the bare minimum for standard decorum suitable for nobility. If this is what a car is like, then I don’t see why you care for your technology,” complained Illunor, who was sitting around idly with a malformed garish bowl of icecream that he had stashed away from lunch.
“If it bothers you so much, perhaps you could help next time with your ‘bigger-on-the-inside’ magic,” I retorted as I slid the last core sample into the back before covering it up with a tarp and strapping it down.
I had originally planned to visit Ljosalfington by myself to acquire much needed exo-materials to test various mana manipulator configurations as I worked to develop my first wand as not all of the materials I needed were procurable locally from Elaseer. I eventually yielded, much to my regret, to allowing Illunor to come with me as he insisted on wanting to deliver a letter personally in town after Thacea had pointed out the wisdom of not travelling alone.
We continued our back and forth for a bit yet as I finished securing my payload a voice called out to me from the direction of the town.
“Excuse me a moment, I couldn’t help but notice but are you from the academy?”
I turned to see an elf dressed in a plain brown buttoned up tunic matched by a slightly shabby pair of trousers with what appeared to be a lute upon his back and a plain and unenchanted longsword on his belt gesturing at our robes. Mine especially were new and unusual, tailored by the academy to go over my armour and allow access to the anchor points and allow me to exit my armour with minimal hassle. Illunor scoffed at what was evidently a commoner’s arrogance at approaching nobility and turned his head away in disgust. I glanced at Illunor and shook my head before turning to face the new man. I had time to spare, and any opportunity to engage in a hearts-and-minds dialogue with the locals outside the bounds of the managed environment of the academy was more than worth the time to chat. Especially as most of the other locals seemed to be content in ignoring me.
“Yes, we are currently studying at the Transgracian Academy. I am Cadet Emma Booker representing the United Nations of Earth and Luna from Earthream, and my aloof compatriot is Lord Illunor Rularia of the Vunerian courts. We were just about to head back but are in no rush. May I ask your name and what brings you by?” I asked with my hand outstretched in greeting.
“Ah yes, yes. My name is Edhel Redoehdelnif, a wandering bard by trade like my father and his father before him. My apologies, Cadet Emma Booker, I am unfamiliar with Earthrealm,” said Edhel as he grasped my hand with both of his and shook it tepidly yet vigorously. Or rather, tried to, as the motors on my suit resisted his efforts.
“News doesn’t seem to spread all that fast around here, so it makes sense you haven’t heard of us. We’re a new realm, and only just got here. Pleasure to make your acquaintance, Edhel Redoehdelnif,” I replied.
“Absolutely fascinating! And a knight no less, or perhaps a squire? I’m sure you have many stories to tell of Earthrealm. Say, by chance are you about to head back to the academy? I have business in Elaseer and the usual coach has been absent as of late so I would rather not go it alone,” said Edhel.
I was hesitant to bring a stranger back in the car with me, even if Illunor was present. However, the opportunity that meeting a bard presented was too good to pass up from an intel perspective and to win the favour of the populace at large.
“That is a great idea. I think I have room for one more…” I paused before gesturing towards Illunor, “provided everyone is ok with it that is.”
Illunor gave a huff and turned his head away in silence.
“Very well, I will allow this. But he will not be joining me in your sorry excuse for a coach,” said Illunor dismissively.
Illunor approached the backseat expectantly and the door opened for him automatically, allowing the dlc kobold to gracefully enter and lounge across the length of the seats, once again ignoring the seatbelts. I sighed as I made my way to the driver’s seat, and Edhel entered from the passenger side as he marveled at the automatic doors and the interior.
“What a strange carriage this is! Although I must say, shouldn’t you be retrieving your horses? I didn’t see any harnesses or sense any artifices,” inquired Edhel as he attempted to make himself comfortable on the car seat, lute in front of him.
“Oh no, this thing doesn’t need horses or magic,” I said with a chuckle as EVI started the car. The elf raised his eyebrows at the sudden hum of the engine and made an expression of alarm when the car started driving itself without my input. “See, purrs like a kitten.”
“Earthrealm must have some large kittens if they purr like that,” noted Edhel, “but you must be concealing the enchantments somewhere. Such a thing as this with such strange yet precise craftsmanship is only possible in the crownlands.”
“Nope, no magic,” I said cheerfully.
“Then how?” Asked Edhel.
“It’s rather simple really. Are you familiar with the workings of a mill?” I asked, deciding to keep things surface level and elementary to avoid provoking the IDOV threshold.
“Somewhat, though I confess to not being familiar with their workings. Are you suggesting this is akin to a mill?” Asked Edhel perplexed.
“It’s the same principal. A mill works by taking a source of rotation such as a waterwheel or windmill, transferring that rotation along a series of rotating shafts and interlocking gears, and finally putting that energy to work by rotating a millstone,” I began as the car pulled out onto the smooth cobbled road in the direction of Elaseer. A notification popped up in the corner of my vision indicating my recon drone swarm had shifted from a holding formation to a convoy screening formation, and while the roads were clear I kept the speed at 60km/h to account for my passenger’s apparent distaste for seatbelts.
“Rotation…” muttered Edhel. He turned to face one of the wheels and EVI pinged an alert for a probable match for a detection spell, “fascinating.”
“Edhel, what are you doing?” I asked.
“Oh, yes, perhaps I should have asked first. Yes, I can see how it all fits together. But the source of this rotation? I see no mighty river or great wind to power this, so where does it come from?” Asked Edhel, not really apologizing. Elven arrogance, it seemed, was not limited by class.
The act reminded me of Sorecar when he inspected my gun, but where the armourer had been respectful with it, Edhel was more flippant. I considered the possibility that he was a spy sent by one of her peers or the crownlands, though this did not mesh with the methods I had seen so far. Edhel may have been just overly enthusiastic. In either case, I quickly decided to only reveal the antique design for the ethanol engine, and not that of the batteries or the emergency coupler to my suit’s fusion reactor.
“Right, well please ask first next time. As to your question, I won’t bore you with the details, but the rotation is generated by creating a periodic sequence of explosions inside of a machine – a manaless artifice – called a combustion engine, said Emma.
“So that’s what that sound is…” pondered Edhel, “are these artifices typical in Earthream?”
“You are awfully inquisitive for a commoner,” noted Illunor as he inspected his nails for dirt, “and rather accepting of something which should be impossible.”
“I wouldn’t be much of a bard if I wasn’t, my lord,” said Edhel shifting uncomfortably in his seat, “perhaps some music might set the mood better?”
“That would be preferable, bard. I have heard enough of the Earthrealmer’s Road Trip Playlist and would like to listen to some music of real culture,” said Illunor.
The bard agreed and proceeded to awkwardly play a ballad about an adventurer who slew a hydra in some frozen wasteland. Partway through, I politely interrupted the Edhel to point out the seat controls much to his fascination and Illunor’s grumbling at their common nature, and after some adjustment the bard went on playing and I half-heartedly listened while I paid attention to the road and my drone feed.
Particularly after EVI detected something unusual and alerted me to its presence.
”Attention Caded Booker. There is a disabled vehicle blocking the primary route to destination. Heat signatures in the woods are consistent with that of an ambush.”
“Damn it,” I muttered.
I glanced at the drone feed to see a broken cart strewn horizontally across a wooden bridge over a brook. On the surface it looked like a pair of civilians who required aid and assistance, but off in the woods were several heat signatures, several of which held weapons of varying levels of enchantments. Occasionally one of the pair on the bridge would talk with them, suggesting they were in cahoots rather than hostages. I recalled crossing that very bridge not a few hours earlier, so the blockade was very recent.
“EVI, did we pass that cart on the way here?” I asked.
”Negative,” replied EVI.
I grimaced. I had been trained to handle road-side ambushes, but it was only something that was a theoretical possibility. Something that should only occur in a warzone or a corrupt and unstable polity. I knew I had the capacity to handle such an encounter, even non-lethally, but that didn’t change the fact that these were civilians and as such were the responsibility of local law enforcement. Combined with the fact that I had passengers I was responsible for and engaging the ambush was a risky option.
“EVI, give me a list of alternative routes,” I commanded.
”Affirmative. Here is a list of routes in order of recommendation,” replied EVI.
I looked over the routes superimposed on a map of the region and quickly dismissed taking a shortcut through the forest and cutting through farmland. A detour caught my eye that extended the journey by roughly ten kilometers and I immediately sent a pair of drones to scout it out before committing to the detour.
“Are you alright, Cadet Emma Booker? You seem distracted,” asked Edhel, snapping me back to reality.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just focused on driving,” replied Emma.
“I suppose it must be quite taxing to command an artificed carriage of this complexity. Perhaps it might ease your mind if you were to regale me a tale of a hero of your realm?” Said Edhel, strumming a complex tune from his lute as he spoke as each and every pluck triggered a low-level spell.
“Well, that may be a problem. We don’t have any monsters to fight, and wars are a thing of the past,” I said while desperately tip-toeing the subject of aunt Ran, the subject of war, and our voyages through the cosmos, “though we are not without the adventurous spirit. We certainly have many stories of grand voyages. Some mythical and fictional such as The Odyssey as told by the Greek poet Homer and some historical such as the race to the south pole.”
“The south pole,” muttered the bard, “so you have explored all of Earthrealm then? I suppose that makes some sense, if you have artifices such as this then traversal of a globe would be quite manageable.”
“You are quite perceptive,” I said, not wishing to elaborate.
“A great performer knows his audience,” said Edhel with a charming, honest, almost human smile.
I felt a pang of homesickness as an intrusive thought reminded me that I could have gone to a real college surrounded by friendly faces my age, engaging in nightly holostreams and dreaming of adventures in the stars from the safety of a college dorm room. The sight of Illunor in the rear camera was the only thing that kept me grounded, as I almost felt like I was back at home on a road trip rather than returning to a fantasy feudal court, constantly evading death at every turn with the fate of humanity on the line. As such, and prompted by EVI, I barely had the wherewithal to take the planned detour.
A fact which did not pass by Edhel.
“I believe you may have taken a wrong turn, Emma,” he commented.
“Nah, I’m just taking the scenic route. I came from that direction on the way here, and you have inspired me to see the other road and I figure it should only add a few extra minutes to our travel time,” I said, gesturing at a paper map which I had referenced exactly once, “though on that subject, you seem to know these lands quite well. Do you have any recommendations on places to visit in the Nexus to scratch that itch?”
Illunor raised his eyebrow at the detour excuse, knowing full well this was not part of the plan. I worried that he might complain about the issue and but thankfully remained silent as he snacked on the contents of the misused sample storage unit. Edhel himself took on a more pensive posture.
“I’m happy to have been such an inspiration, Emma, though I am sure an explorer such as yourself has little need of such. I would normally suggest the skyward fountains of Verdellan or the cloud tides of Asturia, but that may be too casual for someone of your calibre. Perhaps the severed chasm or the fire marsh of Bhandahova may be more to your liking. Or perhaps…” Edhel leaned in, “I have heard rumours of a dragon in the glassy obsidian wastes of Vurcanar.”
I chuckled at that, knowing how I was fortunate enough to fish a dragon scale out of the nearby lake for the ECS. “The thought of going dragon hunting had certainly crossed my mind…” I mused aloud.
“Yet you sound hesitant. Perhaps it is too much for a newrealmer. Perhaps a slime or a dire rat might be more appropriate,” he said with a tease.
“No, it’s not like that! It’s” I stammered, before attempting to change course after realizing I had been goaded, “what I mean is, I was under the impression that dragons were an endangered species. Where I come from, hunting endangered animals is usually illegal, and big game hunting in general is frowned upon. We do make exceptions in the case of problem animals such as if a large predator starts hunting humans, but as a rule we prefer conservation and try to find ways of coexisting with wildlife such as the use of barrier fences and scaring away dangerous animals rather than being forced to cull their numbers. Having a species go extinct would prevent future generations from appreciating them and risks destabilizing the ecosystem they are a part of. Now if this dragon was actively razing villages and eating civilians and livestock, that would be one thing, but this does not look to be the case. I don’t imagine the Nexus has any settlements in this wasteland, and the dragon clearly wants to be left alone. Killing an innocent dragon would be murder.”
I grinned to myself after delivering a diatribe that would have made my tenth grade social and environmental studies teacher beam with pride, though by the expressions of my passengers my view did not appear to be shared. Edhel’s mouth was agape in shock and fascination, while the Venurian in the back seat merely huffed in disapproval.
“I assure you Newrealmer, there are no innocent dragons,” stated Illunor with a hint of terseness breaking through his otherwise regal demeanor.
“Illunor, I understand that Venurians have personal reasons for not liking dragons, but you can’t just extend that disdain to their descendants or those uninvolved just because they are the same species,” I said.
“If I may interject on your behalf, my lord, I believe I can address Cadet Emma Booker’s concerns,” said Edhel with a bow. Illunor nodded in approval.
“Very well, you may proceed,” he said.
“Thank you, my lord. My dear Emma, you must understand that dragons are not simple animals driven entirely off of instinct as it appears to be the case in Earthrealm. They are monsters. Intelligent, long-lived, violent, greedy, cruel, territorial, selfish flesh-eating monsters. They are evil by the very nature of their being, unable to change by their own accord, and unwilling to change when His Eternal Majesty offered them freedom from their nature. It isn’t that they want to be evil. As intelligent animals – intelligent monsters – dragons are capable of understanding morality, and many have tried to overcome their evil nature at great expense to themselves. A well intended and noble sentiment, yet a doomed one as like all animals, they all succumb to their nature in the end. Overcoming one’s nature is impossible,” said Edhel. His eyes took on a stoic, almost remorseful gaze as he spoke, and Illunor nodded with approval.
I was appalled by this claim, not by the contents so much as how blatantly false it was. As a representative of the human race, I was a living counterexample to his whole argument. We had remained physiologically unchanged as a species since the last Ice Age, and yet in spite of that, in spite of our many flaws, we had found peace and balance. If we could do it, anyone could do it.
“Will all due respect Edhel, that is nonsense. Monsters aren’t born, they are made. It is the mark of any intelligent species can adapt their behaviour to their environment for better or worse, and under the right care any so-called monster can grow to be a force for good,” I began, but while I searched for the right words Edhel shook his head.
“I appreciate your race is an empathetic one, Emma, your idealism is unfounded. As flesh eaters, a dragon must take the life of another animal or person to survive, or they will perish. As such, every dragon has taken a life. As long-lived creatures, they will have amassed a significant number of kills. As the land can only support so much animals, a dragon must be fiercely territorial and aggressive to remove competition, lest they starve. As such, even the most kind-hearted dragon alive must be violent and greedy, and their intelligence fuels this even more so if they know a bountiful land of morsels exists just outside their range.
Now perhaps a multitude of dragons may find a way to co-exist together in some settlement, but to support such a venture would require a large territory of prey, or a livestock animal. Perhaps they could support a large colony by farming grain for their livestock, but that would require effort on their behalf. As large animals, such efforts require a great deal of energy. Yet that size makes it easy for them to intimidate smaller races to do their labour for them, and to keep their client race in line dragons must be cruel. And even so, as their numbers grow so do their needs. As such, they must expand into the lands of their neighbours to survive until there is nothing left to devour, at which point they must turn against their own lest they starve. As such, it is the nature of dragons to conquer and devour. That is why there is no such thing as an innocent dragon,” finished Edhel.
I was speechless, not because I believed Edhel had a point, but because I was horrified at how easy he found it to rationalize the extermination of an entire sapient species. If this was how the elves thought, then it wasn’t the dragons who were the monsters. I suppressed that dark thought. Edhel’s thought process was a product of his culture, not a feature of his elven heritage. If there was any hope of peace between our people, I needed to show him there was another way of being. I needed to prove that co-existence was possible, no matter one’s nature.
I took a deep breath to steady myself before replying.
“That- that is a callous way of seeing things,” I began, though the shock was still there in my voice, “you speak as though there is no natural equilibrium with a dragon, that their only state of being must be to be cruel, to devour, to conquer. But I see things differently. In fact, I might wonder if a fledgling civilization might see the presence of a dragon as a boon rather than a curse. Being intelligent, the locals may be able to come to some agreement with the dragon. Perhaps they might leave some land as a hunting ground or offer up a share of their cattle or guard the dragon as it sleeps. In exchange, the dragon might allow them to build a town outside its mountain and protect them in times of danger. An equitable exchange. A civilization might even create artificial lairs to attract dragons for this very reason. True, some dragons may behave tyrannical towards their town, but a well armed populace of a large city would be more than capable of fighting such a threat, and a rational dragon might reason that threatening their own populace would put their reliable source of food and shelter at risk. You see, it’s all a matter of perspective.”
“You certainly are an imaginative one, Emma, to wonder up a quixotic world where the hare and the fox live together in harmony as equals. Even so, you seem to have ignored one key detail to such a society. What would happen should the dragon not be fed for months on end?” Asked Edhel with his eyebrow raised.
“The same thing as stranded a dozen starving, stranded Elves!” I spat back.
[Alert: Vehicle speed above recommended limit for conditions. Recommendation: slow down. ]
“I am driving slow!” I seethed, not realizing I had sped up with manual control enabled.
“I grow tired of this common prattle,” interjected Illunor just in time to prevent an awkward silence, “bard, play us another song.” “As my lord wishes,” said Edhel with a bow before turning to me with another smile, “perhaps a more soothing melody would be in order? A love song perhaps, to honour Cadet Booker’s compassionate nature?”
I said nothing as Edhel began to strum his lute again to the tune of a love story of a pair of doomed lovers named Ramian and Junette, hating his cheeky knowing grin that only served to get under my skin further as I focused on calming down and slowing the car back to a more reasonable pace before investigating a priority alert which I had been blinded to moments prior.
[Alert: hostile roadblock is absent, location unknown.]
Shit.
“Illunor, we may have a problem,” I said.
“Shush, Newrealmer, have you no class? We are almost at the best part! I’m sure it can wait,” replied the contextually clueless lizard.
I had never wanted to throttle Illunor as much as I did now.
“Illunor, shield, now,” I said with a raised voice.
“I don’t see-“ he started, pausing mid-sentence as his ears perked up.
[Alert: Multiple manafield and spell signatures detected!]
I took evasive maneuvers as Illunor tried to piece together a shield spell, fumbling it twice as panic appeared to set in and providing me with a reminder that Illunor was a civilian, not a soldier. A hail of arrows pelted the exterior of the truck, piercing but not penetrating the composite armour. I was tempted to do nothing but just drive away from the arrow fire, but a foreboding premonition of danger filled me as I recalled Sorecar’s hunter-seeker arrows.
Seeking to avoid that fate, I triggered the active defenses.
The smoke screens deployed around the vehicle, obscuring the sight of any who depended on visible light to see me. A barrage of decoy flares equipped with wooden cores shot upward at angles and diffusing to the side like a pair of giant wings which when combined with the MFD, short for mana-field dampener, inside the vehicle meant that the pelting hail of arrowfire softened to a whirr as the arrows whiffed over the top of the truck, retargeted away from the soft flesh of my passengers and even invoking friendly fire amongst the ambushers.
In the chaos, EVI and my drone swarm fed me complete tactical information on the ambush. Of the 26 individuals at the first blockade, 20 were accounted for, and 3 had died from friendly fire. Ahead at the bridge, 5 more of them were at the bridge where a barrier had been hastily erected to cage me in as the river valley was too deep to cross.
“Illunor, we need a bridge,” I said, taking stock of the wellbeing of my passengers.
The bard was huddled down low and suppressing his manafield, but otherwise rather composed. Illunor, on the other hand, was cowering in the gap between the seats with his hands covering his eyes and his tail tucked in.
“A bridge is no small request, Ne- Cadet Emma Booker,” replied Illunor, “and your ‘Emeffdee’ has blinded me to the outside of this moving death trap.”
“If I drop it, can you at least make a ramp?” I asked as I circled the battlefield. Or tried to, at least, as earthen ramparts emerged from the ground from a yet unseen source to cut off other avenues of escape.
“A ramp? Surely you don’t mean-“ he stammered.
“Yes or no,” I said.
Illunor paused, before taking an unsteady breath.
“Yes. But not with that Emeffdee,” he replied.
“Good. Steady your nerves and prepare to make a ramp ahead of us on my signal,” I said, “in the meantime, get your seatbelt on. This is going to be hairy.”
As I circled around to make my approach on the bridge, the final combatant made his appearance on a nearby tree, revealing himself as an elven mage. An alert focused on the air around him indicating he was preparing an unknown high-tier spell, and I locked the predator drone on him indicating the elf as a high-priority target if our escape plan failed, and I was forced to use lethal force.
If I was forced to kill.
It was one thing to know you may have to kill in the line of duty, but it was much harder to reconcile that with reality. No number of simulations could match the real thing, and a part of me wanted to simply offload the responsibility to EVI to keep my hands clean, but to do that would be betraying my duty as a human being. I breathed in deep and tried not to think about it, instead hoping to rely on the ace I held in my sleeve instead.
“EVI, ready the spell jammer,” I said unevenly.
“Acknowledged, the prototype Exo-Radiation Wave-Field Distruptor is primed. High risk target identified and locked, permission to engage?” EVI asked, forcing me to address the dreaded question.
“Negative,” I replied, “hold your fire. If the ramp fails, then you have permission to engage,” I said.
“Affirmative, on your mark,” replied EVI.
I lined up the truck with the bridge and bolted through the smoke, keeping a careful eye on the mage as I went. His spellform took on a more concerning shape as I accelerated, and I realized I could not afford to let him finish his spell. I triggered the spelljammer.
A terrible roar erupted from an array of speakers printed from mana-resistant materials that would have made Godzilla herself beam with pride. The sound was decidedly unnatural, gnarly, dubstep drop composed of an electric eel, a whale, a mountain lion, and a tyrannosaurus rex all being simultaneously assaulted by a swarm of angry cybernetic murder hornets as an equally chaotic wave of mana blasted outwards from the exterior of the truck, with the interior thankfully sheltered by audio and mana dampening.
The ambushing assailants cowered and panicked, and it was enough to cause the Elven mage’s spell to backfire in his face as his form exploded into ashes, meeting a horrific fate which I had tried so desperately to help him avoid. With all the combatants momentarily incapacitated or dead, I lowered the dampener and turned off the smoke.
“Ramp!” I shouted, snapping the lizard back to reality.
The Venerian nodded and hastily formed an earthwork ahead of us right before the blockade, and the truck leapt off the ramp with a not insignificant amount of air beneath our wheels. I braced for impact, regretting skimping on the shocks in the name of preserving materials, but the impact never came.
[Alert: Friendly spell designated ‘Feather Fall’]
Illunor thankfully had enough wherewithal to gently land the steel brick, and I sped off into the distance away from the trap that had unfolded behind us, leaving the interior of the truck in an awkward silence as we each processed our brush with death in our own way. “How many are dead?” I asked EVI.
“6 hostiles confirmed dead,” replied EVI.
I drove on in silence. Those were six deaths I had tried to avoid, and I became lost in thought as I wondered what I should have done differently to avoid the confrontation entirely.
Edhel broke the silence with a bout of laughter.
“Terrific! Absolutely terrific! Why, I can conjure up many a tale from this encounter alone! I live for this kind of inspiration!” Exclaimed Edhel a little too chipperly considering the circumstance.
“I would rather not hear stories about how I bravely ran away,” I moaned in deadpan sarcasm.
“You think too little of yourself, Cadet Emma Booker. It is plain to me that you are no ordinary rabbit. Make no mistake, I see it as a privilege to bear witness to the roar of a vorpal hare!” Said Edhel as he supressed his laughter, “though I am afraid with all the excitement that I must finish my song some other time.”
“How about I play some of our music?” I offered after the elf revealed his thrill-seeking side.
“Splendid, I would like that. Perhaps something of your ‘Roadtrip playlist’ you speak of? It sounds like a collection of your voyages,” said Edhel.
“That would be an improvement on the truth,” said Illunor dismissively as he eased from his state of shock, “it is little more than noise under the pretense of music.”
“Illunor…” I muttered to myself before turning the mic on, “no, no it’s not like that. I have terabytes of pre-recorded songs from various artists back home which can be played by… an artifice called a speaker. A playlist is a set of songs which are grouped together, usually to listen to in specific situations such as studying, partying, or travelling. The latter collection is what Illunor is referring to.”
I very deliberately chose not to reveal my ‘Unfortunate Daughters’ playlist.
“An artifice which plays music, and a magicless one at that. I must say, Emma, I fear for the bards in your realm,” said Edhel with a laugh.
“Your fear is misplaced, Edhel. Entertainers live like kings where I come from,” I retorted with a smirk of my own, “well, the ones with talent at least.”
“Well, well, I suppose I have to hear my competition!” Said Edhel with a laugh.
“Do as you must, though let it be known that I warned you,” said Illunor as he watched a play on his sightseer.
I had EVI compile a list of songs that left out content offensive to Nexian sensibilities or violating OpSec and as it compiled I mused over what type of sample spread I wanted to show off. Then it struck me. What better way to show off our culture than with some good old blue jumpers and nova rock! Sadly, jumpers were unavailable to show but I still had a whole list of modern artists to choose from.
Moments later, the car speakers sprung to life to the tune of ‘Innocent Youth of Mine. Edhel’s eyes lit up like a child visiting a zero-g gravity park for the first time, seemingly star-struck by the antique electric guitar and the synthesizer-drums in particular.
“What… what is this? I have never heard anything like this!” Proclaimed Edhel.
“Dreadful, isn’t it?” said Illunor, doing what he did best and pretending to hate it.
“Oh there is a lot more where that came from,” I said with a cheeky grin of my own, “this one is called ‘Innocent Youth of Mine’ by ‘Cannons and Poppies’. It’s part of the Nova Rock genre.
“And those strange instruments?” Asked Edhel.
“Oh, you mean the electric guitar and the synthesizer. They are electronic instruments, taking advantage of channeled and modulated electricity to create near any sound we can imagine,” I replied.
“Channeled electricity… are you suggesting these sounds were made by some form of lightning?” Asked Edhel.
[Suggestion: Avoid topic of electricity due to OpSec risk]
I nodded at EVI’s warning, thankful that it caught me before I discussed the very thing that all of my equipment ran on.
“It’s not exactly lightning, but close enough,” I said.
“If I had not witnessed to your display of power earlier, I might have perhaps been more skeptical of such a claim, but I suppose a lady must keep her secrets.” said Edhel with a raised eyebrow and chuckle, “but I digress, this music is most interesting.”
“There is a lot more where that came from,” I said with a cheeky grin of my own.
“If I ever have a prisoner in need of torture, I will turn to you first,” replied Illunor, “if you are willing to subject your peers to this madness then I cannot imagine what you would force upon your enemies before dunking them in ice.”
“In your dreams,” I retorted.
I played a few other songs including Astrodesee’s ‘Meteor Struck’, the Martian classic ‘Hotel Cydonia’ and even ‘Switching to Warp’ before Elaseer emerged from the distance, and I pulled up outside the gate to drop Edhel off.
“Here already?” Asked Edhel.
“Well, yeah. I was just running a quick errand, I didn’t want to go too far,” I replied casually.
“That was a distance worth at least five days of walking by foot, and you call that a ‘quick errand’?” Asked Edhel. I shrugged, and he laughed.
“Well in any case, thank you for allowing me passage in your car. I must apologize for my lack of gift or payment…” said Edhel. “Don’t worry about it, it was on the way,” I replied.
“I see, how generous. Perhaps we might one day meet again?” Asked Edhel.
“Maybe, but I’m not sure how likely that is. The academy takes up most of my time,” I replied, “though you never know. I still have a lot of quest hours to complete.”
“Is that so? In that case, I hope we meet again! Goodbye Cadet Emma Booker and farewell Lord Illunor Rularia,” he said. “And good travels to you, bard,” said Illunor.
I waved off Edhel and drove back to the academy, Illunor still sulking in the back seat.
“Perhaps next time, you should steer us away from danger?” Suggested Illunor.
“I tried, but we were tracked,” I replied.
I groaned inwardly at the additional work needed to fix the truck. EVI compiled a list of upgrades for future engagements, batting away my idea for a ‘turbo mode’ and a ‘jump boost’. Though at the end of the day, meeting the bard wasn’t a complete loss. It felt good to talk to someone almost normal for once, and I hoped I met him again.
Edhel Redoehdelnif
I watched as Cadet Emma Booker’s vehicle went off into the distance, getting one last look at the Earthrealmer’s strange artifice before turning towards the gate. The voyage was an exotic experience, not unlike that of a fever dream or a peak into a world completely alien to my own. Indeed, it was a struggle to contain my excitement and enthusiasm and process the experience rationally as I made my way through the southern gates of Elaseer and turned the corner of an alley before entering an impossible structure that did not exist.
“You are earlier than expected,” said the shadowy figure of my handler as I made my way to the meeting hall.
“The Earthrealmer’s means of transportation proved far more expedient than anticipated, my lord” I spoke as I knelt before him, “even with her unexpected departure from the anticipated road and the ambush we traveled for scantly more than an hour.”
“Yes, I will require a full report from you. Perhaps you can shed some light on the ‘smoke dragon’ my men claim intervened on the Earthrealmer’s behalf,” said my handler.
“Smoke Dragon, my lord?” I asked.
My handler responded by activating his sight-seer, revealing how the ambush had appeared from the outside. The Earthrealmer’s uncanny artifice traversed down the road, a pair of manafields displaying proudly from within until the archers began their assault. The artifice then transformed as smoke billowed out from its pores and wings sprung forth above until it was the form of a mighty wrym with a pair of glowing eyes springing forth from its ever extending head where it then gave forth a terrible unholy roar which sent waves of mana outward. The mage working to seal the area and trap their mark vapourized in an instant as his spell backfired. It was apparent to Edhel that his exceptional experience in the carriage was merely a muted rendition of the events unfolding around them.
It would seem the hare had the shadow of a dragon.
“I do have some insight, though I must confess the Earthrealmer did very little in the way of direct action. I suspect she has some unseen means of commanding and scrying through her artifices,” I said, “one which does not utilize magic as we know it.”
“Such a statement is heresy,” said my handler, “but such special circumstances are your reason for being. I will require you submit your memories for verification. What is your appraisal of the new realmer?”
“The girl is far more dangerous than a surface appraisal would suggest, though she prefers to conceal that power rather than utilize it out of a misplaced sense of compassion. Her people appear to have a boundless creative drive through which such artifices are birthed, though again it is misdirected towards more common applications. I believe that if properly tamed, this human animal may provide us with great works of art,” I said with a bow.
“I see. Does the girl know you work for us?” Asked my handler.
“She may harbour some suspicions, though did not voice them outright beyond concealing her knowledge,” I said, “though nothing significant. Provided our next meet is under believable circumstances such as a festival she should view me as cordial.”
“She has indeed proven clever,” conceded my handler, “very well, I will make arrangements for your paths to cross again. Perhaps I will arrange for her to be a contestant at the next inter-academy tournament. In the mean time, prepare your report and don’t wander far. This is a priority assignment.”
“As you wish, my lord,” I said with a bow and a smile.
Emma Booker had proved to be an interesting animal indeed, and I hoped our paths crossed again.

Timestamp: https://imgur.com/a/vpGof94
Most parts are unused/never been fired or taken in the field. There may be small signs of test fitting.
Comment below with questions or dibs. PM me (Not Chat) - or I'll PM you - after dibs to confirm details and lock it down.
Payment via PayPal only. Prices include shipping. You pay the fees if you want G&S. NO COMMENTS. Thanks!
1: Magpul Ar-15 ODG K2-XL Grip w/ oil bottle - $20 SOLD
2: Takeoff RRA Overmolded A2 Grip w/grip screw- $15
3: Boyds Nutmeg Ar-15 Grip (w/screw) - $50
4: VZ AR-15 G10 Frag FDE Grip - $60
5: YHM HK Style Flip FSB - $75 SOLD
6: Unobtanium NEW OLD STOCK Vltor VST-1C Gen 1 Flip FSB and original tool - $175 SOLD
7: POF Dictator Adjustable Gas Block + Tool w/rifle length gas tube - $80 SOLD
8: FCD 6315XE Xeno Mount Flash Hider (perfect for 14.5) - $80
9: AR180 Parts AR180S Cone Flash Hider - $45
10: Helius Tactical 1/2x28 Compensator (Heat Treated) - $25
11: Helius Tactical 5/8x24 1776 Compensator + Extra Timing nuts - $20
12: K-SPEC Enhanced AR15 PCC 9.5 oz Buffer w/Flatware Spring - $75 SOLD
13: BKF 9mm AR Bolt, Nitride - $85 SOLD
14: Unobtanium NEW OLD STOCK Badger Ordnance Stabilizer Handguard (Carbine length or perfect for a quirky .300 blk) - $130 SOLD
15: SLR ION 12.5" Hybrid MLOK in factory Burnt Bronze Cerakote (Briefly test fit but never fully mounted/torqued down. Like New. SLR Specific Barrel Nut wrench, barrel nut, and wedge pieces included) - $250 $225
19: Parallax Tactical FFSSR 13.5" Rail in factory Tungsten Grey Cerkatote (+ barrel nut) - $105 $95
20: McGowen Custom 16" Stainless Rifle Gas .45 Raptor Bundle (for AR-10, 1-10 twist, includes Wojtek gas block) - $280 $160 GOOD FOR HOGS OR DINOSAURS Unfired, never installed This is a sweet set-up for a suppressed Ar10!
21: Ballistic Advantage (EPC9) Barrel 8.3" - $45 Unfired SOLD
22: Aero (EPC9) Barrel 16" - $60 Unfired SOLD
23: Aero 20" 5.56 CMV Barrel w/Pinned FSB, Rifle Length - $95 Unfired SOLD
24: Ruger Ar556 Upper w/CHF Barrel and Enhanced FSB (No BCG or Charging Handle) - $150 Unknown Round Count, Very Good Condition
25: SLR 7075 Aluminum Handstop/Barricade Stop - $40 SOLD
26: WTC Arms AR-15 Magwells (2 BLK, 1 FDE) - $ 21 for all three or ADD-ON FOR $8 EACH. SOLD
27: BAD ODG Anodized 7075 Rack Charging Handle (Ambi, NIB) - $70
28: Aero Enhanced Carbine Buffer Tube ODG Anodized - $25 SOLD
29: Aero Enhanced Carbine Buffer Tube Kodiak Brown Anodized - $25 SOLD
30: KA-BAR D2 Extreme Fighting Knife w/sheath - $110 excellent condition SOLD
31: Geissele DDC Government Charging Handle - $85 SOLD
32: Reptilia Lower 1/3 FDE/Tanodized Dot Mount FOR AIMPOINT Micro/T2 Unused, but the box is beat up - ~~$70 $60~~ SOLD
33: B&T Coyote Angled 45° Handstop - $45
34: Magpul ODG SL Stock + Enhanced Buttpad - $55
35: Wellsmade Company Navajo Pattern Sling - $45 SOLD
36: WOOX Walnut MLOK Panels - $40 (OR $25 if purchased with the Nill Grip!) SOLD
37: Ar15 PSG1 Style Nill Oiled Walnut Adjustable Match Grip + WOOX Walnut MLOK panels - $255 SOLD (Purchased for $320 + tax and shipping in 2020)
38: Elftmann Straight Match Trigger (New, hand-adjustable model + Antiwalk Pins) - $140 (Trigger is NIB, The pins have a bit of wear on one edge)
39: Doublestar 7075 Aluminum Folding A1 Rear Sight - $65
40: Spikes 7075 Micro Adjustable Folding Rear Peep Sight (perfect for under an LPVO) - $65
41: Battle Arms Development Blue Aluminum Enhanced Takedown and Pivot Pin Set - $15 (OR $10 with the Blue Safety) SOLD
42: Battle Arms Development BAD-ASS-LITE Ambidextrous Safety Selector, 90/60, Lightweight, Reversible, Anodized Blue - $40
43: Elftmann Stainless Push Button Speed Safeties - 2x 1x at $25 Each 1x SOLD, 1x AVAILABLE
44: Phase5 Blk Aluminum Winter Trigger Guards - 1x unopened at $20, and 1x slightly scratched/salted at $15
45: Aero XL Stripped Big Bore Upper Receiver - $65

FT: Washington Spirit 4-2 Angel City FC

Venue: Audi Field
Auto-refreshing reddit comments link
LINE-UPS
Washington Spirit
Aubrey Kingsbury, Annaïg Butel, Tara McKeown, Casey Krueger, Gabrielle Carle, Croix Bethune (Lena Silano), Hal Hershfelt, Andi Sullivan (Paige Metayer), Ouleymata Sarr (Kate Wiesner), Trinity Rodman (Brittany Ratcliffe), Ashley Hatch (Courtney Brown).
Subs: Nicole Barnhart, Heather Stainbrook, Chloe Ricketts.
^{____________________________}
Angel City FC
DiDi Haracic, Megan Reid, Sarah Gorden (Jasmyne Spencer), Madison Curry, Gisele Thompson (Merritt Mathias), Clarisse Le Bihan (M.A. Vignola), Rocky Rodríguez, Lily Nabet (Madison Hammond), Sydney Leroux (Messiah Bright), Alyssa Thompson, Claire Emslie.
Subs: Katie Johnson, Kennedy Fuller, Angelina Anderson, Hannah Stambaugh.
MATCH EVENTS via ESPN
9' Goal! Washington Spirit 1, Angel City 0. Trinity Rodman (Washington Spirit) left footed shot from the centre of the box to the top left corner. Assisted by Ouleymata Sarr.
15' Substitution, Angel City. Jasmyne Spencer replaces Sarah Gorden because of an injury.
20' Own Goal by Annaïg Butel, Washington Spirit. Washington Spirit 1, Angel City 1.
23' Goal! Washington Spirit 1, Angel City 2. Sydney Leroux (Angel City) header from the centre of the box to the high centre of the goal. Assisted by Claire Emslie with a cross following a set piece situation.
30' Goal! Washington Spirit 2, Angel City 2. Trinity Rodman (Washington Spirit) left footed shot from the centre of the box to the bottom left corner. Assisted by Croix Bethune.
34' Goal! Washington Spirit 3, Angel City 2. Casey Krueger (Washington Spirit) right footed shot from the centre of the box to the bottom left corner. Assisted by Tara McKeown following a corner.
36' Goal! Washington Spirit 4, Angel City 2. Ouleymata Sarr (Washington Spirit) right footed shot from the centre of the box to the bottom left corner. Assisted by Croix Bethune with a through ball following a fast break.
43' Lily Nabet (Angel City) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
45'+2' Madison Curry (Angel City) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
45'+4' Substitution, Washington Spirit. Kate Wiesner replaces Ouleymata Sarr because of an injury.
61' Jasmyne Spencer (Angel City) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
65' Gisele Thompson (Angel City) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
70' Substitution, Angel City. Madison Hammond replaces Lily Nabet.
70' Substitution, Angel City. M.A. Vignola replaces Clarisse Le Bihan.
70' Substitution, Washington Spirit. Courtney Brown replaces Ashley Hatch.
77' Substitution, Angel City. Merritt Mathias replaces Gisele Thompson because of an injury.
77' Substitution, Angel City. Messiah Bright replaces Sydney Leroux.
87' Substitution, Washington Spirit. Brittany Ratcliffe replaces Trinity Rodman.
87' Substitution, Washington Spirit. Paige Metayer replaces Andi Sullivan.
87' Substitution, Washington Spirit. Lena Silano replaces Croix Bethune.
90'+4' Claire Emslie (Angel City) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
^{Don't see a thread for a match you're watching? Click here to learn how to request a match thread from this bot.}

FT: Washington Spirit 4-2 Angel City FC

Venue: Audi Field
Auto-refreshing reddit comments link
LINE-UPS
Washington Spirit
Aubrey Kingsbury, Annaïg Butel, Tara McKeown, Casey Krueger, Gabrielle Carle, Croix Bethune (Lena Silano), Hal Hershfelt, Andi Sullivan (Paige Metayer), Ouleymata Sarr (Kate Wiesner), Trinity Rodman (Brittany Ratcliffe), Ashley Hatch (Courtney Brown).
Subs: Nicole Barnhart, Heather Stainbrook, Chloe Ricketts.
^{____________________________}
Angel City FC
DiDi Haracic, Megan Reid, Sarah Gorden (Jasmyne Spencer), Madison Curry, Gisele Thompson (Merritt Mathias), Clarisse Le Bihan (M.A. Vignola), Rocky Rodríguez, Lily Nabet (Madison Hammond), Sydney Leroux (Messiah Bright), Alyssa Thompson, Claire Emslie.
Subs: Katie Johnson, Kennedy Fuller, Angelina Anderson, Hannah Stambaugh.
MATCH EVENTS via ESPN
9' Goal! Washington Spirit 1, Angel City 0. Trinity Rodman (Washington Spirit) left footed shot from the centre of the box to the top left corner. Assisted by Ouleymata Sarr.
15' Substitution, Angel City. Jasmyne Spencer replaces Sarah Gorden because of an injury.
20' Own Goal by Annaïg Butel, Washington Spirit. Washington Spirit 1, Angel City 1.
23' Goal! Washington Spirit 1, Angel City 2. Sydney Leroux (Angel City) header from the centre of the box to the high centre of the goal. Assisted by Claire Emslie with a cross following a set piece situation.
30' Goal! Washington Spirit 2, Angel City 2. Trinity Rodman (Washington Spirit) left footed shot from the centre of the box to the bottom left corner. Assisted by Croix Bethune.
34' Goal! Washington Spirit 3, Angel City 2. Casey Krueger (Washington Spirit) right footed shot from the centre of the box to the bottom left corner. Assisted by Tara McKeown following a corner.
36' Goal! Washington Spirit 4, Angel City 2. Ouleymata Sarr (Washington Spirit) right footed shot from the centre of the box to the bottom left corner. Assisted by Croix Bethune with a through ball following a fast break.
43' Lily Nabet (Angel City) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
45'+2' Madison Curry (Angel City) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
45'+4' Substitution, Washington Spirit. Kate Wiesner replaces Ouleymata Sarr because of an injury.
61' Jasmyne Spencer (Angel City) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
65' Gisele Thompson (Angel City) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
70' Substitution, Angel City. Madison Hammond replaces Lily Nabet.
70' Substitution, Angel City. M.A. Vignola replaces Clarisse Le Bihan.
70' Substitution, Washington Spirit. Courtney Brown replaces Ashley Hatch.
77' Substitution, Angel City. Merritt Mathias replaces Gisele Thompson because of an injury.
77' Substitution, Angel City. Messiah Bright replaces Sydney Leroux.
87' Substitution, Washington Spirit. Brittany Ratcliffe replaces Trinity Rodman.
87' Substitution, Washington Spirit. Paige Metayer replaces Andi Sullivan.
87' Substitution, Washington Spirit. Lena Silano replaces Croix Bethune.
90'+4' Claire Emslie (Angel City) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
^{Don't see a thread for a match you're watching? Click here to learn how to request a match thread from this bot.}

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Cephalapod Genesis
The pharoah ejaculated into the river and in the sand the sperm found refuge and grew into papyrus. This an example of genesis.
Vampyrapods are the first intelligent species to live on this planet predating the dinosaurs. They came here somehow. They did not evolve on this planet. Perhaps just an ejaculated sperm from another being landing in the water. The direct offspring of this cephalapod is the modern octopus. Octopus are responsible for nearly every animal genesis on earth including humans and subsequently man made inventions and accomplishments. Octopus taught trees to fruit, destroyed the dinosaurs through becoming tapeworms, and even walked to the moon. Some of the animals you may recognize from the cellular genesis may have fused with the other local staples such as canine, equine, and feline, and reptile as well as temporarily the pachyderms in post-actualization causal genesis. This can be done by mating with, killing, eating, dying, being eaten, or simply a laying of hands or physical actions. Octopus only live for about 4.5 years of our relationship with time, but they have beaten death through a mix of telepathy and cannabalism. They've also mastered time travel. There are only 3 actual beings here. Others died in getting here and are fossilized. 2 males and 1 female survived. I call them Jack, Seth, and Claire. This is why the genesis had to completed this way as any direct offspring would not work. because theyve have infinite time to complete it, theyve walked over every inch of the planet and affected every species. In fact our own existence is simply the echo of the combined knowledge of the cephs. We are an amalgamation like the 'too much good stuff' guy from am/pm commercials. Make a bird with your hands. ¿Where are the beaks? The latest project is to use genetic science in order to bring back the mammoth and obtain a sixth digit from its feet. Should happen around 2027. When the vampyrapods first encountered life here it was eating their tentacles. So the first genesis occured in the offspring of those that ate of the tentacles. This is why modern cephs only have 8 limbs. The first language period is Enochian. A language of the eyes and limbs. Through different manipulation of limbs and eye fluctuations communication was made. After a while though telepathy became the established communication.
Here are some examples but not all of cephalapod genesis:
• Spiders (rare from trilobyte mix, had to go back in time to accomplish) (they had to avenge the original vampyrapods from being eaten from early organisms, thisnis how scorpions were able to evolve) • Mango (foilage and ceph mix. Ceph hung from a tree upside down) • Star fruit (the tree missed the octopus and tempted it to return) • Pinecone ( the bite marks of ceph beak eating the fruit of the trees) • Toucan (the beak formation from ceph in flux probably consuming a failed aviary) • Peacock (feather formations still in flux from limbs partial fusion) • Salamander (reptile/chameleon mix) (skin breathing evolution) •Sloth (feline and foilage mix) • Mistletoe bird (octopus ate a mushroom) • Lyrebird (mirage, digitage, and aviary from peacock and pheasant. Mastered the art of sound mimickry to develop better auditory communications) • Dung beetle (rolling backwards the earth through time) • VW bug (trunk up front) (mirage, digitage, pachyderm mix) (invented higher than the model T but arrived later in time) • Goliath bird-eating tarantula ( set a web to catch a bird which did not exist fully until the web was cast. When the spider consumed the bird the psuedo cannabalistic action resulted in a poison tree frog) • Snakes (a ceph lost its mating limb for some reason in a mirage mix experiment) • venemous snakes (a snake ate the eggs of its own offspring)(the cursed dinosaur souls live inside these) • Gumby (using hands to mold clay made a show about being an octopus) • Chameleon (reptile, ceph, foilage, mirage mix)(a ceph was purposely eaten by a komodo dragon to telepathically send a reverse osmosis of its makeup inside its body to another ceph that was attempting to kill the dinosaurs in the past. How they programmed the tapeworm to destroy them)

• Human organs (strife and love and tapeworm mix. Impregnating a mix of canine feline equine, ceph, pachyderm, reptilian, mirage, digitage, foilage, strife and love through years of experimentation lodged themselves systematically into more and more advanced versions and became functional in each iteration) • Sumi ink tattoo ink any ink really • The written word (anemone, sea urchin, porcupine quill, Bird feather and ink. Papyrus) • Floppy disk (suction cup on a piece of mail specifically a bill and the suction cup on the plastic window) • Cd, dvd, blu ray (laying of hands on a television screen) • Television (just a series of ceph exploring life through the inside of a glass tank with mirage and digitage mix) • Movie theater ( same but aquarium instead) • Papillon (love + insect from trilobyte and ink and papyrus needed training wheels to learn how to fly) • Taser (digitage mix of the two extra original tentacles lost from vampyrapod with mix of electric eel which was a detached limb of an octopus that had achieved ball lightning static existence) • Wisteria (ceph and foilage mix) (needed the seeds to play mancala or something) • Water strider (walked on water) • Lunar lander (digitage) (tapeworms in humans directed construction, the first electronic component gestalt high enough to become digital) (a tree really wanted to go to the moon) • Champagne cork (Ate some bark, vent plugged up and had to pee really bad) • Electrostatic Ball (attempting time travel, a ceph was meditating in complete non movement inside a digitized mirage flashing irridescence until it passed away) • Ball lightning (time travel attempt Same ceph tried a pure digitage and mirage mix) • Gnarwal (chameleon tongue, mirage and pachyderm) • Light bulb (ceph + mirage + digitage mix) (octopus crawled into a mirage jar and was irridescent) • Liquor bottle (octopus got stuck in a fulgarite and died temporarily trapping its soul in reflection but the invention of cork escaped it) • Silly string (mirage mix) (angry octopus sprayed another with diarhea from its vent) • Tapeworms (had to brave a walk into a volcano and die. As the octopus melted while running, it evolved the turkey, turkey vulture, vulture, and was just a slithering worm by the time it was engulfed by lava) • The Ten Commandments (vampyrapod fossils brought by a tapewormed moses to show people and try and explain the religion) • Dumbo (actually just a tiny cute octopus) • Hydra from capt america (introducing the public to idealogy of cephs) • Tobacco leaf (the laying of hands on deciduous plantlife, a gift to the early iterations of human) • Cow (equine ceph and pachyderm mix) essentially the Orca ate the Octopus, in its 4th stomach it finally died and so when the cow who has 4 stomachs manifested it came with udders symbolic of the octopus genesis in post actualization-causation • Rapa nui. The end of time. (Great stone heads disembodied) (mirage and strife)the final resting place. A graveyard. A place of rest always available

This is long, I'm sorry.
I recently landed a pretty sweet gig after a disastrous experience. The new job is working on the "production line" of a local thrift store. I had applied to cashier, but when they saw that I had jewelry experience they offered an opportunity as their jewelry sorter.
I basically sort through donated jewelry searching for the good stuff -gold, silver, diamond, gems. But as you can imagine the bulk of this is mostly costume and junk (and mean junk) jewelry. The job itself is pretty good. It doesn't pay great, but it's full time, two days off in a row, benefits and so on.
And I do have jewelry experience. I worked for a few years selling "fine" and costume jewelry for a bigger retail chain, and I've worked retail for years in a store that sold high quality costume jewelry. I know how to tell the difference between a cz and a real diamond. I know what stamps to look for on precious metals, and I know if gem stones are real or glass. And I know the price of gold and silver per ounce.
At my previous jewelry job we had extensive training. However that was 10 or so years ago, so I admit I'm rusty.
Anyway. The management failed to inform me that I, a single human being, is replacing a previous team of 3. I was given a packet of jewelry pricing standards to go by. Some are accurate, true, and common sense. Some of them seem to be intirely made up. It also suggest we base prices on regular retailers like JC Penney or Clairs. That said, my real issue are the women who work on the sales floor in the "jewelry department."
Since day one they have been complaining about the prices I set. On every thing. Whether is a plastic home made bead bracelet with someones name in block letters or a diamond ring. And it's not what you think. No. They're complaining that my prices aren't high enough.
Every day they bring me jewelry they think should be priced higher, or they complain to the boss that I'm not pricing things high enough. Mind you, any thing I find that is REAL gold, diamonds, gems, gets run by the boss first before it hits the sales floor.
We have a coding system on our price tags that allows us to tell how long merch has been on the floor. Usually, after a month, it gets pulled and put in a jar and sold at bulk.
I pointed out to my boss how much old jewelry there was that had high prices that clearly wasn't selling, even on half off days, as evidence that the previous pricer may have had higher expectations. He agreed.
Two particular co- workers have been making my days a living hell. One lady, seemed friendly and helpful at first but she has become menicaing and problematic. 3 days this week she sat in the back with me to "help," but she just ate, argued, and trashed my work station. I was able to put out 20 more pieces with her "help" than alone.
I have talked to the boss about it and he told me not to worry about them, that my prices are fine, jewelry sales are good, and to worry about his opinion, not theirs. Id agree, but it just seems to be getting worse and bordering on harassment. I feel like he should tell them what he told me, and let me do my job.
The stress definitely effects my work, how focused I am, how much I get done. And I'm uncomfortable now. Id prefer to work alone if the help isn't helping. I admit I'm overwhelmed at the volume of product and I need help. Not with pricing, but with processing (sorting, organizing, mating earnings.) if I could get help with that I could blow through pricing in a couple hours.
I told this co worker today that I would address the issues of disagreeing with my prices with the boss, and she didn't like that at all.
Beyond that, I dont know what else to do. How do I handle this issue? I need this job right now, so jumping ship with out a life raft isn't an option. Any advice would be great.

Up until this point, I've (unsurprisingly) been unable to find the full lyrics to the new song Sad Pilot (though the highlighted comment under this video has the chorus), so I attempted to figure them out myself. Thank you to u/_Twyla for helping me a lot with this. Keep in mind that this is probably not 100% accurate, since the only source I have of this song is the footage of the gig in Offenbach, so if you find any mistakes, lmk in the comments. With that out of the way, enjoy!
[Verse 1]
I've been to the doctor somewhat recently Yeah Haven't felt safe in my skin It doesn't help me out Go back policing my pain And it's got me disintegrating
[Bridge 1]
How will they manifest (Manifest) In what materials we’re living in (I don't know, I don't know) How long can one spend dying? (A year before) They completely disappear
[Chrous]
Gotta leave my problems at the jet bridge Can't be carrying heavy luggage Gotta leave my problems at the jet bridge Can't be carrying heavy luggage (Relationships) Start falling to pieces No matter how much I keep on screaming (Treat ‘em) How you like to be treated Leave your problems at the door
Turn off, balling up, freedom, ahhhhh
[Verse 2]
We should never never get to this point of no return It seems as though I’ve hit a roadblock The world’s ain’t pulling up, they keep dragging down Got a lot of views of birds
[Bridge 2]
I’ve been drinking (Drinking, drinking) On the job Not much thinking going on (About the passengers of Cannonball) Fate is winking (Fate is winking) And giving me the lie Time is a-twitchin’ for my big god He says I’m trying to pay the fine
[Chrous]
Gotta leave my problems at the jet bridge Can't be carrying heavy luggage Gotta leave my problems at the jet bridge We’re suffering some heavy losses Psychologists know They ain’t listening No matter how much i keep on screaming Treat me like you treat the other one Learn to leave your problems at the door
[Verse 3]
I’ll just keep on winging there There’s always blue skies ahead I’ll just keep on winging there I gotta keep it on in the air With my chin up (Chin up) I’ll fly high (Fligh high) Set the sail I’ll just keep on winging there Gotta keep it all up in the air

Live Music

• Joshua "Tennessee" Worthy, Mill Top Tavern, 12:00 pm – 4:00 pm
• Cliff Dorsey, Pierre's Pub, 1:00 pm – 5:00 pm
• Mike Cook, Backyard Island Cafe at Meehan's, 1:00 pm – 5:00 pm
• ZaZa Flamenca, Bin 39 Wine Bar, 1:00 pm – 4:00 pm
• Mark Evans, Fish House & Oyster Co., 5:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• Sue Seymour Westcott, The Tides Oyster Co. & Grill, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• David Watt Besley, The Tides Oyster Co. & Grill, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• House Cats, Marina Munch, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• Dewey Via, Backyard Island Cafe at Meehan's, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• Aaron Esposito, Embassy Suites by Hilton, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• Ace Winn, DJ's Clam Shack, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• Claire Vandiver, Guy Harvey Resort, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• Bret Blackshear, Crabby's Beachside, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• Wes Register, Mellow Mushroom — St. Johns, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• Christian Powers, Mellow Mushroom — Anastasia Island, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• King Eddie and the Pili Pili, The Cellar Upstairs Wine Bar & Restaurant, 6:00 pm – 10:00 pm
• Walt Kulwicki, Oasis Deck & Restaurant, 6:00 pm – 9:30 pm
• Duffy Bishop Band, Fuzion 904 Eatery, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• Green With Envy, Pierre's Pub, 6:00 pm – 10:00 pm
• Allen Arena, Hurricane Patty's Bar and Grill, 6:00 pm – 9:30 pm
• One Good Ring, 7:00 pm – 10:00 pm
• ZaZa Flamenca, River & Fort, 7:00 pm – 10:00 pm
• Dave's Not Here or Jerry's Other Hand, A1A Ale Works, 8:00 pm – 12:00 am
• Kyra Livingston, Meehan's Irish Pub & Seafood House, 8:00 pm – 12:00 am
• Vegas Gray, Tradewinds Lounge, 9:00 pm – 1:00 am
• Alan Dalton and Terry Campbell, Mill Top Tavern, , 9:00 pm – 12:00 am

First Coast Opera: The Stranger's Tale

• First Coast Opera and the Romanza Festivale present a free performance of The Stranger's Tale, on Friday, May 17, 2024, at noon, at the Ancient City Baptist Church.
• Funded in part by the Romanza Festivale of the Arts and by the National Endowment for the Arts, this opera premiered in 2005 with an original libretto by Nelson Sheeley. First Coast Opera's Artistic Director, Curtis Tucker, wrote additional music for the production.
• escribed as a "story of faith and hope," and written as a companion piece to Stravinsky's L'historie du soldat (A Soldier's Tail,) The Stranger's Tale focuses on modern homelessness and its impact on the unhoused and their communities. Using drama and music, set in a park near a park bench, the entire piece is centered on an unnamed man who is experiencing homelessness.
• At the 2005 premiere, reviewers said that the writing was sincere, the music accessible, and that it was a hit with the audience.
• Admission: Free
• When: Friday, May 17, 2024 at noon.
• Where: Ancient City Baptist Church, 27 Sevilla Street, St. Augustine, Florida.
• First Coast Opera will accept donations at this event to benefit the Homeless Coalition of St. Johns County.
• This event is part of the Romanza Festivale of Music and the Arts, an annual festival of two weeks of historical, cultural, and creative events celebrating all things St. Augustine. From May 3 -19, the nation's oldest city will be jam-packed with music and dance concerts, living history events and historical tours, live theater, and art exhibits.

Romanza Festivale: Author Visit with Elizabeth Randall

• Elizabeth Randall, freelance writer, and author of six non-fiction books and one mystery, will visit with fans and writers at the Voorhees Mission building at St. Cyprians Episcopal Church on Friday, May 17, 2024, from 3:00 to 4:00 p.m. This event, presented by Romanza Festivale, will include wine, cheese, and conversation.
• A retired English teacher, Ms. Randall is an adjunct instructor in English composition at Seminole State College in Sanford. Two of Ms. Randall's non-fiction books feature events in St. Augustine. At this event, Ms. Randall will focus on Murder in St. Augustine, the Mysterious Death of Athalia Ponsell Lindsley. This murder, in 1974, is still discussed and debated among St. Augustine residents.
• Admission: Free.When: Friday, May 17, 2024, from 3:00 to 4:00 p.m.
• Where: In the Voorhees Mission House (on the grounds of St. Cyprians Episcopal Church) at 130 Martin Luther King Avenue, St. Augustine, Florida 32084.
• This event is part of the Romanza Festivale of Music and the Arts, an annual festival of two weeks of historical, cultural, and creative events celebrating all things St. Augustine. From May 3 -19, the nation's oldest city will be jam-packed with music and dance concerts, living history events and historical tours, live theater, and art exhibits.

Before Juneteenth: Emancipations in Florida

• In 1865, 11 days after the end of the Civil War, two years after President Abraham Lincoln's Proclamation, emancipation * was proclaimed in Florida. On Friday, May 17, 2024, from 3:00 to 4:30 p.m., the Lincolnville Museum and Cultural Heritage Center (LMCHC) hosts an event to explain and discuss emancipation in Florida.
• The afternoon will begin with a short documentary, Before Juneteenth: Emancipations in Florida. This documentary is being presented in several Florida communities this season, and Regina Gayle Phillips, LMCHC's executive director is featured in the film. There will be a virtual question and answer session after the viewing with Dr. Tameka Hobbs, Charlene Farrington, Dinizulu Gene Tinnie, and Brittany Flowers.
• Dr. Hobbs, from Fort Lauderdale, is a historian, educator, and activist
• Ms. Farringtion is the museum director of the Spady Cultural Heritage Museum in Delray Beach
• Mr. Tinnie, of Miami, is an artist, educator, and activist
• Brittany Flowers is a filmmaker.
• Admission: $10.00 per person. When: Friday, May 17, 2024, from 3:00 to 4:30 p.m.
• Where: Upstairs, at the Lincolnville Museum and Cultural Heritage Center, 102 Martin Luther King Avenue, St. Augustine, Florida 32084.
• Free parking is available in the front and back of the building and paid parking is available at a lot across Martin Luther King Avenue. The entrance to the second-floor room is off Pomar Street. There is an elevator.

St. Augustine Concert Band Season Finale

• The St. Augustine Concert Band will perform their season finale concert from 7:30 to 9:00 p.m. Friday, May 17, 2024, in the Center of the Arts at R.J. Murray Middle School.
• This season finale concert, "Imagination," will feature works from modern-day prominent composers. Composers Brian Balmages, Dakota Peterson, Todd Salter, and others have all written thought-provoking, challenging, and moving compositions. * The concert will take the audience on a journey of imagination, allowing them to experience the power and emotion in each work.
• First established in the early 1900s with a small military-style band of some 16 members, the acclaimed St. Augustine Concert Band now features about 70 performers, from amateurs to students and semi-professionals, all from the surrounding area.
• Admission: Tickets are $20.00 for adults and $5.00 for students with ID. Children under age 12 are free.When: 7:30 to 9:00 p.m. Friday, May 17, 2024
• Where: R.J. Murray Middle School: Center of the Arts, 150 North Holmes Boulevard, St. Augustine, Florida 32092
• This event is part of the Romanza Festivale of Music and the Arts, an annual festival consisting of two weeks of historical, cultural, and creative events celebrating all things St. Augustine. From May 4 through May 19, 2024, the nation's oldest city will be jam-packed with music and dance concerts, living history events and historical tours, live theater, and art exhibits.

Megan Moroney at The Amp

• The St. Augustine Amphitheatre welcomes Megan Moroney on Friday, May 17, 2024, at 7:30 p.m. Doors open at 6:00 p.m.
• Hailing from Georgia, country music artist Megan Moroney is steadily climbing the industry ladder. "Tennessee Orange" earned her a prestigious award at the Country Music Television Awards. "I'm Not Pretty" achieved notable success, reaching the top 40 on the Billboard chart while capturing the hearts of fans and country music enthusiasts.
• Acknowledged by Rolling Stone for her natural talent, Megan consistently shares her music across multiple streaming platforms.
• Admission: Ticket prices range from $29.50 to $54.50. Tickets can be purchased online or at the St. Augustine Amphitheatre Box Office, which is open on Thursdays and Fridays from 10:00 a.m. to 6:00 p.m. and on Saturdays from 8:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m.
• When: Friday, May 17, 2024, at 7:30 p.m. Doors open at 6:00 p.m.
• Where: St. Augustine Amphitheatre is located at 1340 A1A South in St. Augustine, Florida 32080.
• Parking Information: The Amp St. Augustine is located on Anastasia Island next to Anastasia State Park. Limited paid parking is available in The Amp's Main Lot, but only with advance purchase of a Premium Parking ticket. Free satellite parking areas are located within one mile of the Amphitheatre, at R.B. Hunt Elementary and at Anastasia State Park (see map below).
• Shuttle Information: The St. Augustine Amphitheatre shuttle system begins its run 45 minutes before show time. The shuttle will pick up event patrons at four designated shuttle stops: the R.B. Hunt Elementary School Soccer Field, the west entrance of the Anastasia State Park Main Parking Lot, the Loop at the Anastasia State Park, and the entrance of the St. Augustine Amphitheatre. To see the full shuttle route, please see the map below.
• Shuttles will run continuously until approximately 45 minutes after the scheduled start time of a concert. For anyone wanting to leave before the end of a show, shuttles will begin taking people back to the satellite parking areas one hour before the event is over. The driver will not depart The Amp until the shuttle is more than 50% full.

Romanza Festivale: Con Brio

• The Romanza Festivale presents the Con Brio String Quartet on Friday, May 17, 2024, at 7:30 p.m. This internationally acclaimed string quartet will perform in a free concert at the First United Methodist Church on King Street.
• The four talented performers, Valentin Mansurov and Marina Lenau on violin, David Pedraza on viola, and Aziz Sapaev on cello, are all based in Southeast Florida. Members of the quartet are from Russia, Uzbekistan, Mexico, and Ukraine, each has received competitive awards and scholarships, and each performs in several of the area's music ensembles.
• "Con Brio" means "with panache," and it is with panache that this talented and multicultural quartet brings their skills, energy, and worldliness to every concert. One of the headliner acts for 2024, the concert on May 17th will include works from great composers.
• Admission: Free
• When: Friday, May 17, 2024, from 7:30 to 9:00 p.m.
• Where: First United Methodist Church, 118 King Street, St. Augustine 32084
• A Romanza Festivale 2024 event.
• This event is part of the Romanza Festivale of Music and the Arts, an annual festival consisting of two weeks of historical, cultural, and creative events celebrating all things St. Augustine. From May 3 -19, 2024 the nation's oldest city will be jam-packed with music and dance concerts, living history events and historical tours, live theater, and art exhibits.

Dustin Sims at Cafe Eleven

• Café Eleven welcomes Dustin Sims on Friday, May 17, 2024, at 8:00 p.m. Doors open at 7:00 p.m.
• With a massive following and a knack for humor, comedian Dustin Sims continues to captivate audiences unapologetically. Originating from Oxford, Alabama, Sims swiftly became a beloved figure, renowned for his comedic sketches that chronicle his eccentric escapades and misadventures.
• Among his standout sketches are "Talkin' to Myself," "Wives Love to Be Right," "Best Funeral," and "My Kids Don't Do Mornings."
• Admission: VIP Tickets cost $45.00 if purchased in advance and $50.00 on the day of the show. General seating tickets cost $32.00 in advance and $35.00 on the day of the show. Purchase tickets in advance online or purchase them at Café Eleven on the day of the show.
• When: Friday, May 17, 2024, at 8:00 p.m. Doors open at 7:00 p.m.
• Where: Café Eleven, 501 A1A Beach Blvd, St. Augustine, Florida 32080. On the corner of A1A and 11th Street, one block from St. Augustine Beach.

Sampoorna Hatha Yoga and Japa Meditation at Essential Energy Spa

• Every Friday, starting March15th
• Essential Energy Spa
• 3440 U.S. 1 S, Suite 202
• St. Augustine, FL 32086
• 10 am - 11 am
• Admission: $25

2025 Pin Up Paws Calendar Contest

• May 17 @ 12:00 am - 11:59 pm
• It’s that time of year! The St. Augustine Humane Society Annual Contest for the 2025 Pin Up Paws Calendar begins at 8:00am on May 1, 2024. The “Sweet Things” themed calendar will showcase the winning pets in all their adorableness.
• Submit a photo of your pet and start rooting for votes, each vote worth $1.00. Voting is May 1, 2024 at 8:00am through Saturday, July 13, 2024 at 8:00pm. And, you can vote as many times and for as many pets as you wish!
• The Pet with the most votes becomes the cover pet for the 2025 Sweet Things calendar. The next twelve pets with the next highest amount of votes will be a monthly pin up pet. All pets will enjoy a professional photo shoot with award-winning photographer Addison Fitzgerald.
• Prizes: *First-Place pet (along with being on the cover) also receives a $100.00 gift certificate to the Columbia Restaurant, two tickets to the Pin Up Paws Party, and two copies of the calendar. *Second-place winners receive a $50.00 Columbia Restaurant Gift
• Certificate and two calendars. *Twelve runners-up will be featured with their submission photos and a description. *The top 80 pet fundraisers will have a small photo on a collage page.
• The 2025 calendar will be revealed at the Pin Up Paws Party on Thursday, October 24, 2024 at The White Room.
• Date: May 17
• Time: 12:00 am - 11:59 pm

I am unable to post the sources because they are getting flagged as spam since they are all similar in name. So please visit this site for the list.
Written out urls here tinyurl.com/yjkw32kd

For future events please visit the Discord.

https://discord.gg/NG4eZSWAgR

Live Music

• Joshua "Tennessee" Worthy, Mill Top Tavern, 12:00 pm – 4:00 pm
• Cliff Dorsey, Pierre's Pub, 1:00 pm – 5:00 pm
• Mike Cook, Backyard Island Cafe at Meehan's, 1:00 pm – 5:00 pm
• ZaZa Flamenca, Bin 39 Wine Bar, 1:00 pm – 4:00 pm
• Mark Evans, Fish House & Oyster Co., 5:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• Sue Seymour Westcott, The Tides Oyster Co. & Grill, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• David Watt Besley, The Tides Oyster Co. & Grill, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• House Cats, Marina Munch, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• Dewey Via, Backyard Island Cafe at Meehan's, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• Aaron Esposito, Embassy Suites by Hilton, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• Ace Winn, DJ's Clam Shack, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• Claire Vandiver, Guy Harvey Resort, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• Bret Blackshear, Crabby's Beachside, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• Wes Register, Mellow Mushroom — St. Johns, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• Christian Powers, Mellow Mushroom — Anastasia Island, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• King Eddie and the Pili Pili, The Cellar Upstairs Wine Bar & Restaurant, 6:00 pm – 10:00 pm
• Walt Kulwicki, Oasis Deck & Restaurant, 6:00 pm – 9:30 pm
• Duffy Bishop Band, Fuzion 904 Eatery, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• Green With Envy, Pierre's Pub, 6:00 pm – 10:00 pm
• Allen Arena, Hurricane Patty's Bar and Grill, 6:00 pm – 9:30 pm
• One Good Ring, 7:00 pm – 10:00 pm
• ZaZa Flamenca, River & Fort, 7:00 pm – 10:00 pm
• Dave's Not Here or Jerry's Other Hand, A1A Ale Works, 8:00 pm – 12:00 am
• Kyra Livingston, Meehan's Irish Pub & Seafood House, 8:00 pm – 12:00 am
• Vegas Gray, Tradewinds Lounge, 9:00 pm – 1:00 am
• Alan Dalton and Terry Campbell, Mill Top Tavern, , 9:00 pm – 12:00 am

First Coast Opera: The Stranger's Tale

• First Coast Opera and the Romanza Festivale present a free performance of The Stranger's Tale, on Friday, May 17, 2024, at noon, at the Ancient City Baptist Church.
• Funded in part by the Romanza Festivale of the Arts and by the National Endowment for the Arts, this opera premiered in 2005 with an original libretto by Nelson Sheeley. First Coast Opera's Artistic Director, Curtis Tucker, wrote additional music for the production.
• escribed as a "story of faith and hope," and written as a companion piece to Stravinsky's L'historie du soldat (A Soldier's Tail,) The Stranger's Tale focuses on modern homelessness and its impact on the unhoused and their communities. Using drama and music, set in a park near a park bench, the entire piece is centered on an unnamed man who is experiencing homelessness.
• At the 2005 premiere, reviewers said that the writing was sincere, the music accessible, and that it was a hit with the audience.
• Admission: Free
• When: Friday, May 17, 2024 at noon.
• Where: Ancient City Baptist Church, 27 Sevilla Street, St. Augustine, Florida.
• First Coast Opera will accept donations at this event to benefit the Homeless Coalition of St. Johns County.
• This event is part of the Romanza Festivale of Music and the Arts, an annual festival of two weeks of historical, cultural, and creative events celebrating all things St. Augustine. From May 3 -19, the nation's oldest city will be jam-packed with music and dance concerts, living history events and historical tours, live theater, and art exhibits.

Romanza Festivale: Author Visit with Elizabeth Randall

• Elizabeth Randall, freelance writer, and author of six non-fiction books and one mystery, will visit with fans and writers at the Voorhees Mission building at St. Cyprians Episcopal Church on Friday, May 17, 2024, from 3:00 to 4:00 p.m. This event, presented by Romanza Festivale, will include wine, cheese, and conversation.
• A retired English teacher, Ms. Randall is an adjunct instructor in English composition at Seminole State College in Sanford. Two of Ms. Randall's non-fiction books feature events in St. Augustine. At this event, Ms. Randall will focus on Murder in St. Augustine, the Mysterious Death of Athalia Ponsell Lindsley. This murder, in 1974, is still discussed and debated among St. Augustine residents.
• Admission: Free.When: Friday, May 17, 2024, from 3:00 to 4:00 p.m.
• Where: In the Voorhees Mission House (on the grounds of St. Cyprians Episcopal Church) at 130 Martin Luther King Avenue, St. Augustine, Florida 32084.
• This event is part of the Romanza Festivale of Music and the Arts, an annual festival of two weeks of historical, cultural, and creative events celebrating all things St. Augustine. From May 3 -19, the nation's oldest city will be jam-packed with music and dance concerts, living history events and historical tours, live theater, and art exhibits.

Before Juneteenth: Emancipations in Florida

• In 1865, 11 days after the end of the Civil War, two years after President Abraham Lincoln's Proclamation, emancipation * was proclaimed in Florida. On Friday, May 17, 2024, from 3:00 to 4:30 p.m., the Lincolnville Museum and Cultural Heritage Center (LMCHC) hosts an event to explain and discuss emancipation in Florida.
• The afternoon will begin with a short documentary, Before Juneteenth: Emancipations in Florida. This documentary is being presented in several Florida communities this season, and Regina Gayle Phillips, LMCHC's executive director is featured in the film. There will be a virtual question and answer session after the viewing with Dr. Tameka Hobbs, Charlene Farrington, Dinizulu Gene Tinnie, and Brittany Flowers.
• Dr. Hobbs, from Fort Lauderdale, is a historian, educator, and activist
• Ms. Farringtion is the museum director of the Spady Cultural Heritage Museum in Delray Beach
• Mr. Tinnie, of Miami, is an artist, educator, and activist
• Brittany Flowers is a filmmaker.
• Admission: $10.00 per person. When: Friday, May 17, 2024, from 3:00 to 4:30 p.m.
• Where: Upstairs, at the Lincolnville Museum and Cultural Heritage Center, 102 Martin Luther King Avenue, St. Augustine, Florida 32084.
• Free parking is available in the front and back of the building and paid parking is available at a lot across Martin Luther King Avenue. The entrance to the second-floor room is off Pomar Street. There is an elevator.

St. Augustine Concert Band Season Finale

• The St. Augustine Concert Band will perform their season finale concert from 7:30 to 9:00 p.m. Friday, May 17, 2024, in the Center of the Arts at R.J. Murray Middle School.
• This season finale concert, "Imagination," will feature works from modern-day prominent composers. Composers Brian Balmages, Dakota Peterson, Todd Salter, and others have all written thought-provoking, challenging, and moving compositions. * The concert will take the audience on a journey of imagination, allowing them to experience the power and emotion in each work.
• First established in the early 1900s with a small military-style band of some 16 members, the acclaimed St. Augustine Concert Band now features about 70 performers, from amateurs to students and semi-professionals, all from the surrounding area.
• Admission: Tickets are $20.00 for adults and $5.00 for students with ID. Children under age 12 are free.When: 7:30 to 9:00 p.m. Friday, May 17, 2024
• Where: R.J. Murray Middle School: Center of the Arts, 150 North Holmes Boulevard, St. Augustine, Florida 32092
• This event is part of the Romanza Festivale of Music and the Arts, an annual festival consisting of two weeks of historical, cultural, and creative events celebrating all things St. Augustine. From May 4 through May 19, 2024, the nation's oldest city will be jam-packed with music and dance concerts, living history events and historical tours, live theater, and art exhibits.

Megan Moroney at The Amp

• The St. Augustine Amphitheatre welcomes Megan Moroney on Friday, May 17, 2024, at 7:30 p.m. Doors open at 6:00 p.m.
• Hailing from Georgia, country music artist Megan Moroney is steadily climbing the industry ladder. "Tennessee Orange" earned her a prestigious award at the Country Music Television Awards. "I'm Not Pretty" achieved notable success, reaching the top 40 on the Billboard chart while capturing the hearts of fans and country music enthusiasts.
• Acknowledged by Rolling Stone for her natural talent, Megan consistently shares her music across multiple streaming platforms.
• Admission: Ticket prices range from $29.50 to $54.50. Tickets can be purchased online or at the St. Augustine Amphitheatre Box Office, which is open on Thursdays and Fridays from 10:00 a.m. to 6:00 p.m. and on Saturdays from 8:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m.
• When: Friday, May 17, 2024, at 7:30 p.m. Doors open at 6:00 p.m.
• Where: St. Augustine Amphitheatre is located at 1340 A1A South in St. Augustine, Florida 32080.
• Parking Information: The Amp St. Augustine is located on Anastasia Island next to Anastasia State Park. Limited paid parking is available in The Amp's Main Lot, but only with advance purchase of a Premium Parking ticket. Free satellite parking areas are located within one mile of the Amphitheatre, at R.B. Hunt Elementary and at Anastasia State Park (see map below).
• Shuttle Information: The St. Augustine Amphitheatre shuttle system begins its run 45 minutes before show time. The shuttle will pick up event patrons at four designated shuttle stops: the R.B. Hunt Elementary School Soccer Field, the west entrance of the Anastasia State Park Main Parking Lot, the Loop at the Anastasia State Park, and the entrance of the St. Augustine Amphitheatre. To see the full shuttle route, please see the map below.
• Shuttles will run continuously until approximately 45 minutes after the scheduled start time of a concert. For anyone wanting to leave before the end of a show, shuttles will begin taking people back to the satellite parking areas one hour before the event is over. The driver will not depart The Amp until the shuttle is more than 50% full.

Romanza Festivale: Con Brio

• The Romanza Festivale presents the Con Brio String Quartet on Friday, May 17, 2024, at 7:30 p.m. This internationally acclaimed string quartet will perform in a free concert at the First United Methodist Church on King Street.
• The four talented performers, Valentin Mansurov and Marina Lenau on violin, David Pedraza on viola, and Aziz Sapaev on cello, are all based in Southeast Florida. Members of the quartet are from Russia, Uzbekistan, Mexico, and Ukraine, each has received competitive awards and scholarships, and each performs in several of the area's music ensembles.
• "Con Brio" means "with panache," and it is with panache that this talented and multicultural quartet brings their skills, energy, and worldliness to every concert. One of the headliner acts for 2024, the concert on May 17th will include works from great composers.
• Admission: Free
• When: Friday, May 17, 2024, from 7:30 to 9:00 p.m.
• Where: First United Methodist Church, 118 King Street, St. Augustine 32084
• A Romanza Festivale 2024 event.
• This event is part of the Romanza Festivale of Music and the Arts, an annual festival consisting of two weeks of historical, cultural, and creative events celebrating all things St. Augustine. From May 3 -19, 2024 the nation's oldest city will be jam-packed with music and dance concerts, living history events and historical tours, live theater, and art exhibits.

Dustin Sims at Cafe Eleven

• Café Eleven welcomes Dustin Sims on Friday, May 17, 2024, at 8:00 p.m. Doors open at 7:00 p.m.
• With a massive following and a knack for humor, comedian Dustin Sims continues to captivate audiences unapologetically. Originating from Oxford, Alabama, Sims swiftly became a beloved figure, renowned for his comedic sketches that chronicle his eccentric escapades and misadventures.
• Among his standout sketches are "Talkin' to Myself," "Wives Love to Be Right," "Best Funeral," and "My Kids Don't Do Mornings."
• Admission: VIP Tickets cost $45.00 if purchased in advance and $50.00 on the day of the show. General seating tickets cost $32.00 in advance and $35.00 on the day of the show. Purchase tickets in advance online or purchase them at Café Eleven on the day of the show.
• When: Friday, May 17, 2024, at 8:00 p.m. Doors open at 7:00 p.m.
• Where: Café Eleven, 501 A1A Beach Blvd, St. Augustine, Florida 32080. On the corner of A1A and 11th Street, one block from St. Augustine Beach.

Sampoorna Hatha Yoga and Japa Meditation at Essential Energy Spa

• Every Friday, starting March15th
• Essential Energy Spa
• 3440 U.S. 1 S, Suite 202
• St. Augustine, FL 32086
• 10 am - 11 am
• Admission: $25

2025 Pin Up Paws Calendar Contest

• May 17 @ 12:00 am - 11:59 pm
• It’s that time of year! The St. Augustine Humane Society Annual Contest for the 2025 Pin Up Paws Calendar begins at 8:00am on May 1, 2024. The “Sweet Things” themed calendar will showcase the winning pets in all their adorableness.
• Submit a photo of your pet and start rooting for votes, each vote worth $1.00. Voting is May 1, 2024 at 8:00am through Saturday, July 13, 2024 at 8:00pm. And, you can vote as many times and for as many pets as you wish!
• The Pet with the most votes becomes the cover pet for the 2025 Sweet Things calendar. The next twelve pets with the next highest amount of votes will be a monthly pin up pet. All pets will enjoy a professional photo shoot with award-winning photographer Addison Fitzgerald.
• Prizes: *First-Place pet (along with being on the cover) also receives a $100.00 gift certificate to the Columbia Restaurant, two tickets to the Pin Up Paws Party, and two copies of the calendar. *Second-place winners receive a $50.00 Columbia Restaurant Gift
• Certificate and two calendars. *Twelve runners-up will be featured with their submission photos and a description. *The top 80 pet fundraisers will have a small photo on a collage page.
• The 2025 calendar will be revealed at the Pin Up Paws Party on Thursday, October 24, 2024 at The White Room.
• Date: May 17
• Time: 12:00 am - 11:59 pm

I am unable to post the sources because they are getting flagged as spam since they are all similar in name. So please visit this site for the list.
Written out urls here tinyurl.com/yjkw32kd

For future events please visit the Discord.

https://discord.gg/NG4eZSWAgR

Electronic equipment repair toolkit is an indispensable assistant for every professional repairman or DIY enthusiast. A quality toolkit not only improves work efficiency, but also ensures the safety of the repair process. Today, we will introduce several Phonefix highly rated computer, electronic equipment repair toolkits.
Computer as well as Mobile device assembly and modification can extend the functionality of a computer and improve its performance, and when a computer malfunctions, it is necessary to alter the computer components. These things can cost hundreds of dollars if a professional is called in to do the work, but with a good repair kit and some care, computer cell phone den electronic device users can have the repairs done at home at a much lower price.
Below is a list of the best repair kits for computers and other mobile devices, as well as a buying guide to help you choose the best repair kit for you.

• Most Combination: Multi-function 170-in-1 Screwdriver Set
• Most Professional: Mechanic KINGKONG Mini Screwdriver Set
• Most with anti-static wrist band: 9 IN 1 Full Set Silicone Soldering Mat
• Most Essential Tool Kit: 34 In 1 Magnetic Screwdriver Set
• Most Multi-Tool: 3D Precision Screwdriver
• Most Ergonomic: Magnetizer Demagnetizer Screwdriver Tips
• Most Comprehensive: 100/139/155 in 1 Professional Electronics Tool Kit
• Most Affordable: Precision Screwdriver Set 80 In 1

1. Most Combination-Multi-function 170-in-1 Screwdriver Set
Regardless of the type of repair task for the electronic device at hand, the UnaMela Computer Toolkit is up to the task. The toolkit contains 170 different gadgets and more to match almost any small screw on your computer's emergency mobile device.
The kit comes with all the tools needed for a variety of jobs. Ideal for repairing laptops, mobile devices and other delicate items such as watches and glasses. Lightweight and compact design, made of CRV steel with a hardness of up to HRC52 56 for long-lasting use.
2. Most Professional-Mechanic KINGKONG Mini Screwdriver Set
Mechanic KINGKONG Mini Screwdriver Set Cell Phone Tablet Removal Tool with R10 Crystal Storage Case.Mechanic Screwdriver iPhone Android Repair Removal Tool. Bit model number is printed on the box to help you quickly identify the bit. The compact screwdriver set is perfect for carrying in your tool bag or pocket.
The kit is designed to meet the needs of professionals and hobbyists alike. It is coated with anti-rust oil on the surface of the bit to avoid rust, the surface of the screwdriver is sandblasted and anodized to prevent sweat and corrosion, and the grip is designed with a three-dimensional non-slip pattern for a stable grip.
3. Most with anti-static wrist band-9 IN 1 Full Set Silicone Soldering Mat
Computer or mobile device repair can be a very tedious process as the entire computer can be damaged if you are not careful. Therefore, it is important to have a repair kit that is safe to use, such as the 9 IN 1 Full Set Silicone Soldering Mat Professional Electronics Repair Kit.
The included anti-static wrist strap prevents static discharge from damaging the PC, and the kit comes with an ergonomic press-fit screwdriver handle. In addition, thanks to the high-quality construction, users can rely on their tools to last for the duration of each repair.
4. Most Essential Tool Kit-34 In 1 Magnetic Screwdriver Set
Not every user needs 100 different tools to repair a computer, which is why this CS0601A 34-Piece Electronics Repair and Unboxing Toolkit is a simple repair toolkit that focuses only on the necessary tools and avoids all the extras.
This tool kit can be used not only for computers but also for other electronic work. The kit comes with a nice carrying case, making it an ideal toolkit for professional technicians and DIYers on the go.
One reviewer confirms that "all the tools are just the right size and the included tools allow you to do a lot of different jobs". Another user commented that "the tools are sturdy and seem to be of above average quality".
5. Most Multi-Tool- 3D Precision Screwdriver
6 Hybrid Precision 3D Screwdrivers Cell Phone Repair Hand Tools, Universal Size Reliable 3D Screwdrivers Includes Phillips (1.2mm), Torx T2, Slotted (1.5mm), 5-Pin (0.8mm), Y-Three Point (0.6mm), Specified Phillips (2.5mm). Do more than just repair computers. This kit can handle PCs, laptops, gaming systems, eyeglasses, jewelry, and more.
One buyer used the kit in his work and thought "it is very convenient as it has many pointed models. The tips accommodate a variety of screw openings, which is a plus."
6. Most Ergonomic-Magnetizer Demagnetizer Screwdriver Tips
Computer repairs can take hours, so it's important to use tools that are not only comfortable, but also allow the user to maintain precision and optimal control. That's why the Magnetizer Demagnetizer Screwdriver Tips Set has a screwdriver with a non-slip grip and ergonomic design.
7. Most Comprehensive: 100/139/155 in 1 Professional Electronics Tool Kit
With a total of 135 components, this professional electronic tool kit truly has all the tools that users want or need for PC and computer repair. With a variety of the most commonly used screwdriver bits, buyers will be able to find the right screwdriver bit for any screw they come across while using the kit.
Even with so many small pieces, the kit keeps everything organized and easy to find with its labeling and two-color coding system.
One customer wrote, "This is one of the nicest precision screwdriver sets I have ever used. "

8. MOST AFFORDABLE: PRECISION SCREWDRIVER SET 80 IN 1

The Repair Tool is a great option for DIYers who want to save money. For an affordable price, users get a 56-piece tool set that's more than enough for most computer jobs.

CHOOSING THE BEST REPAIR TOOL KIT—BUYING GUIDE

Before purchasing a computer or mobile device repair kit, users should understand what a computer repair kit does and what the different tools are used for. Since almost all components in a computer are held in place by tiny screws, what these kits have in common is that they come with screwdrivers. Most tools come with a variety of different styles and sizes of magnetized screwdrivers.

OTHER FACTORS TO CONSIDER

In addition to the selection of tools in a repair tool set, users should also consider other factors to determine if the set is worth the investment. 1. Quality: The quality of the tools has a direct impact on the efficiency and safety of the repair job. High-quality tools not only last longer, but are also easier to handle, reducing the risk of equipment damage due to tool problems 2. Price: Price is also an important consideration. While high-quality tools may cost more, they may be more cost-effective in the long run due to their longer lifespan!
We hope our best computer repair toolkit reviews have been helpful. For more related products, including soldering stations, microscopes, batteries, screens, and more, check out these other guides from PHONEFIX.

This is a straight to the point buyers guide for people that are wondering if any of the AL ships are worth buying or not. I am here to give you an idea of what's worth, and what's not. I will rank them in descending order for convenience. Keep in mind that these are from my own opinions on the game: my word is not law. These are just my recommendations from my personal experience and a spur of the moment deal personally.

Best Pick: AL Montpelier

This is a premium version of Cleveland, the USN tier VIII CL. However, unlike the later AL premiums, AL Montpelier was unique in at least, a very minor way: She has tighter shot grouping due to a 2.15 sigma versus the standard 2.0 at the cost of slower reload at 0.5 sec slower (7 sec vs 6.5 sec). The result is overall consistent salvos, at the cost of just a little DPM that can be fixed with Adrenaline Rush and Top Grade Gunner, depending on how you build her.
Besides that, she also has un-nerfed version of radar, at a 30 sec vs 27 sec on Cleveland. That doesn't sound like a big deal, but if you run Consumable Enchantments and or Surveillance Radar Mod 1, you have a larger number that the percent based changes will take affect on. Essentially, with both the commander skill and 2nd slot upgrade, you get 39.6 sec vs 35.6 seconds on duration. So a radar build is not bad compared to Cleveland. Besides that, she doesn't have access to the catapult fighter consumable, but that is super seceded by radar and anyways so who cares.
And above all else, it is a Cleveland, which is IMO, a very competitively viable cruiser at tier VIII, with it's very small citadel, thin profile / narrow beam that leads to a lot of over-penetrations, good DPM, good concealment, and good AA. It really only lacks in the speed, gun range, and shell flight time problems, which can be remedied with skill and positioning.
As far as the commander voice acting, Rie Takahashi voices Montpelier. If you do not know who that is or do not care, and just want to know if the commander's voice is annoying or not, then be happy that she isn't overtly grating compared to some of the other commanders you can get. I find her rather composed, cool, and relaxed, fitting the trope of kuudere, if you even know what that means.
TLDR: Premium Cleveland with higher sigma, slightly lower RoF, Longer lasting radar.

Runner Up: AL Sovetsky Rossiya

This is a premium version of Sovetsky Soyuz, the VMF (Soviet Navy) Tier IX BB. Like Montpelier, she is slightly unique to her tech tree counterpart, bar being premium, by having standard battleship dispersion (USN, Royal Navy, German, etc.) instead of Russian BB dispersion formula that gets way better inside 15km. She does also have 1.8 sigma versus 1.7 sigma, for slightly tighter shot grouping. So, while Soyuz excels at mid range, Rossiya excels at long range, which does reasonably well considering the average high tier meta these days.
Other than that, you retain all the upsides of Fast action Damage Control Parties, the tough hull design of the Sovetsky Soyuz. The only other thing you DO NOT get is the AA, as she has the Hull A of Sovetsky Soyuz, and in turn has worse AA overall. In fact, she has such bad AA that only Musashi beats her out in having worse AA for Tier IX battleships. So yeah, CVs that know their targets will have free reign on you, so stick close to allies in CV matches.
Now a I'll be honest with you, Rossiya is not a super competitive BB at tier IX, so this choice is really just down to being different in few ways instead of blatant copy paste. Really, only AL Montpelier is the only super competitive option here. So above all else, Rossiya is a side grade if anything and you should not fear of having FOMO for not getting her. Besides, she's not an historical ship that is going to get removed because it was OP, so fret not (COUGH COUGH MUSASHI, COUGH COUGH ALASKA, COUGH COUGH MISSOURI).
Lastly, the commander is voiced by Manami Numakura. I can really only characterize her as cool, tough, deep voiced anime woman archetype. I dunno really how to explain it that well, so I apologize for anyone that likes her due to my poor description.
TLDR: Premium Sovetsky Soyuz Hull A with 1.8 sigma and standard battleship dispersion.
OK, with those two out of the way, I want to put a disclaimer here that the next ships are purely optional and not super worth it IMO and really only selected for being different than the rest, I.E. not something that is currently offered in other ships / premium ships already in-game.

Optional 1st Pick: AL Prinz Heinrich

This is a premium version of Prinz Heinrich, the tier VII german battlecruiser of the Ersatz Yorck class. She is a 1 for 1 copy of Prinz Heinrich: no special differences here besides premium benefits.
Now, while she is not unique in any way, she is not a bad battlecruiser for tier VII standards. This mainly comes down to the 50mm deck plating she has in a tier wrought with battleships with just 26mm of plating on their decks. Really, any tier VII battleship that has more than 27mm of plating is really competitive in this tier, simply because they don't get overmatched or full-penned by HE. It's sort of why Scharnhorst '43 is so popular and good, since she doesn't get chunked for 10k when hit by 15 in + guns (380mm guns for ya'll metric nerds).
Besides that, she's not slow as hell, going at a decent 28 knots, has 15in guns herself, has fast acting DCP, and is the first ship in the german battlecruisefast battleship line that gets that sweet improved secondary dispersion formula, which despite the 9km max range, means that she has free DPM to let the game play itself essentially. Combined with torpedoes, she can bum rush many slower and weaker battleships that the german battlecruiser line is famous for. And on top of all that, she also has hydro for better pushing to see torpedoes earlier, or push smoked up ships.
Now for some cons, the guns, while using battlecruiser dispersion have an awful 1.5 sigma, so your shot grouping is... bad. Do not be surprised if a lot of your shells in your salvo get a mind of their own. Besides that, she's on the below average end of HP for tier VII, at 56k. Also, she does have 25mm bow and stern. She does have a 30mm extended belt (colloquially known as an ice breaker), which is followed by 120mm extended belt, that protects the lower portion of the ship from overmatch bar 18in guns that she MIGHT face in the likes of Georgia, Sun Yat Sen, Musashi, and Tsurugi, and Adatara. Still, that doesn't mean she is immune from overmatch, as the odd shell can still get through her bow and stern and chunk you, so do not bet on it 100%.
Now that is for the most part, the review. However, for any true fans out there, they know that Prinz Heinrich from AL is actually a P-Class cruiser, AKA Schill in this game. Since Schill was a limited time ship that required whaling for her, and that wargaming dropped the ball and just did "Oh this ship has the same name! Here ya go!" then you know how much this kind of sucks. If you just like Prinz Heinrich, and want her as a premium, you can ignore this tidbit, but for any true fans that DO NOT have Schill, you're shit outta luck.
As far as commander goes, the voice actor, Hiyori Nitta, does a wonderful job characterizing a carefree and bubbly character. As previously mentioned, I recommend putting her on Schill if you really care about game accuracy, that is, if you even had Schill to begin with.
TLDR: Premium Prinz Heinrich copy-paste. Get it only if you really like Prinz Heinrich (the ship) which is actually pretty good for its tier, and want a premium version of it, or Prinz Heinrich as the character.

Optional 2nd Pick: AL Shimakaze

Hoo boy, this one might be controversial. This is a special ship (NOT a premium ship) of IJN DD, Shimakaze.
Shimakaze really needs no introduction. It is the old school torpedo boat that coined the phrase "Torpedo soup" or at least contributed to that phrase. It can put 3x5 23k damage, 12km Type 93 long lance torpedoes into the water. It has some of the best concealment for her tier, getting down to 5.6km surface detect, and good speed at 39 kts (42 kts when speed boost is active). It has been here since the games launch, and well, admittedly, or at least in my opinion, has seen better days.
Still, while some other DDs might have powercrept her a little, you can't mistake the fact that a well played Shimakaze can terrorize a team that lacks the tools to pin her down. Even if that is seldom the case most of the time (48% win rate on NA out of 8 million battles), the ship still has strong tools when played to it's strengths. 23k damage torpedoes are no joke... if you get hit by them at least, as they have a pretty awful average reaction time of ~9.35 sec (according to wows ship builder). Now, this can be sort of remedied with building for torpedo speed, getting torpedo tubes mod 1 and swift fish to decrease that time to ~8.5 sec, but that's still far above the average of 7.8 sec most torpedoes have in other nations. Still, if you get the right angle, devstriking a full HP battleship is not uncommon if you get a perfectly lined up shot. Thing is, it takes WAY more skill and positioning than you think it does, especially considering that most top tier players sort of know what they're doing, and that a lot of top tier ships can run hydroacoustic search these days.
Combined with the fact that she has some of the worse gun DPM of any tier X DD, and has fairly low HP for the tier, it can be fairly hard to play this ship unless you get just the best matchmaking ever. It's a real feast or famine type ship, which I would say summarizes most of the IJN Shimakaze line in general, bar maybe the mid tiers. All this really means is that Shimakaze is NOT the most competitive DD at tier X, as arguably many other nations have better torpedo boats, or better yet, opt for hybrid boats that can defend themselves fairly well, such as the Pan Euro DDs. Still, as mentioned earlier, if played to her strengths, she can be a good ship, but all I am arguing for is that she is not a meta ship, at least in my opinion.
Now, onto the whole Special Ship thing. Yes, this IS a tier X ship that can be bought for money. And YES, this is like the ARP Yamato deal, allowing noob whales to skip to tier X and forgo all the blood sweat and tears that goes into grinding to top tier. And YES, IT'S A SHIMAKAZE, THE TIER X NOOB MACHINE. I DO NOT HAVE HIGH HOPES FOR MANY AL SHIMAKAZE PLAYERS EITHER. With that out of the way, what benefit do you get for getting a special ship version of Shimakaze?
Well, to start, Special ships essentially have the premium bonus package already baked in, I.E: +50% Credits, +100% Ship XP, +100% Commander XP, +100% Free XP. On top of that, you also have a reduced repair cost compared to a standard tier X. Besides that, you can freely swap commanders onto this ship like a premium ship with no retraining required, making it a good trainer. These are the ONLY 2 reasons that make this ship more economically viable compared to Shimakaze. While the bonus package on Shimakaze can achieve 1 of these 3 effects, the other two, reduced repair cost and free commander swapping, puts this above standard Shimakaze as a result.
So, unfortunately, This is a slightly better Shimakaze. So if you REALLY like Shimakaze, and want a premium version of it, well, here it is, for a lot of goddamn money. Like $100+ expensive. Go figure ya know?
Also, the commander is voiced by Saori Hayami.
TLDR: Special Ship verison of Shimakaze. Take if you are a whale have a lot of expendable income to burn, AND really like Shimakaze (The ship), and or really like Shimakaze (the AL character).

Optional 3rd Pick: AL Yukikaze

AL Yukikaze is a similar version of the IJN DD Kagero, but with F8 torpedoes and no option for torpedo reload booster.
Now, this is the last of the semi-unique AL ships, as every other one has been copy-paste. Yukikaze at the very least is different in that she has F8 torpedoes. These differ than Kagero's choice by having less range, (8km vs 10km), higher damage (21k vs 20k), faster reload (104 sec vs 112 sec), and higher speed (76kts to 67kts) which also leads to a better reaction time of ~8.8 sec vs ~9.45 sec.
Now, does this make Yukikaze better? No, not really, as 8km is rather short range for high tier standards. It does make them almost break past ~8 sec reaction time with a full torpedo speed build, the best of any type 93 torpedo, but combined with the fact that it has no other differences in gun handling, DPM, HP, and consumables, I find this shorter ranged torpedo to be a high risk high reward setup, which already exacerbates high tier IJN DD gameplay further than it already is, being so heavily feast or famine.
I can really only recommend this ship if you really like Kagero for whatever reason and really like the 8km F8 playstyle. That and if you like the history of the ship and or like the character of the ship, voiced by Kana Yuuki, despite how annoying and self aggrandizing her character is made out to be.
TLDR: Kagero but 8km F8 torpedoes.
OK, now for the ships I really do not recommend at all for varying reasons. The reviews are going to be more brief from here on out.

Skip 1: AL Cheshire

Only get this if you really, REALLY want to get Cheshire right now. Currently, regular Cheshire is off sale, and cannot be obtained. For whatever reason you think you might need Cheshire, this is the only way to obtain her at the moment in AL form. Which more than likely means that if you want her, you are more than likely a fan of the AL character, as the ship itself is pretty bad. Kind of polarizing given that Cheshire in AL is pretty meta, and her in WoWs she's pretty solidly in D tier for competitiveness.
She is essentially a worse Albemarle, having no Spotter Plane, and garbage DPM for the tier. Really, the 9.2 in guns really only offer 59mm of pen vs 34mm, and better AP pen with overall flatter flight times, but not by much. The armor is Okayish, but trust me when you will get smacked through your bow and stern often, as you have a stepped citadel that if you get overmatched through either direction, you WILL get citadelled. While you get that 50% cit and hull repair party, it really doesn't matter that much when it happens so often, or you just get straight up dev striked. Combined with the lack of spotter plane, that 16km gun range will feel really short, especially when you are bottom tier.
You can at least be happy that the AA she has is up to par in how she is in AL, as it's best in class for her tier. Well, mostly, but her Flak Count is above average at 6+1, and combined with always having defensive fire, I recommend getting the commander skill Focus Fire Training, so you get that +1 flak cloud for 8 in total, which combined with Defensive fires flak buff, those flak bursts will do 7k a pop, Which is the equivalent to instantly destroying about 7 to 3 planes depending on the type if they run into it while DF is active.
Besides that, the commander is voiced by Shizuka Ishigami, and well, pretends to be a catgirl.
TLDR: Get this if you really really, REALLY want Cheshire and you don't have one, or because you really like the AL character.

Skip 2: AL Hornet

This is just Hornet. You can get her cheaper with a 25% discount coupon. It's also a CV, which I imagine is not everyones cup of tea.
The commander is voiced by Nozomi Yamamoto, and personally, I enjoy the happy go lucky characterization she has. This might be the ONLY reason you want to get Hornet, that or because you like the cool skin the ship has, and or the free 10 point commander.
TLDR: Get regular Hornet with 25% discount. ONLY buy this if you love AL Hornet (the character) to pieces.

Skip 3 & 4: AL Azuma and AL Agir

These two are just Agir and Azuma, coal ships, that you can get absolutely for free. They are also not really the best Tier IX cruisers anyways, as Azuma is super vulnerable to battleships, and Agir doesn't match up to the likes of other large cruisers at this tier.
That said, I can only imagine you getting these ships for the same reasons for Hornet, and that is because you are a fan of the AL characterization of these ships, as Azuma is voiced by Kiyono Yasuno, and Agir, Ayane Sakura. Or you just like the ship skins.
TLDR: Get Azuma and or Agir for free with Coal. ONLY buy this if you love AL Agir / AL Azuma (the characters).

BONUS: Commander Pack

Hahaha no. Unless you really love AL and don't mind by dropping... looks at price... 100$+ USD and getting a ton of fully voiced commanders, then go for it. The only other reason would be because you are a fresh player and need 10 point commanders for most of the nations in this game, which is really only useful if you need say concealment expert on destroyers for example, then sure, go for it if you find that to be an OK option.

EDIT: BONUS BONUS: AL Littorio

I forgot AL Roma, I mean AL Littorio is also a thing, and on an 80% sale.
Anyways, Roma herself sucks.
The guns have so much muzzle velocity that you will overpen targets 50% of the time. Combined with the Italian / french dispersion, which is one of the worst battleship dispersion formulas for battleships. So, they are fairly inconsistent guns as a result. Still, if the guns behave, they are pretty mean, as they have a lot of penetration for 15 in guns, on par with some of the best penetration for tier VIII battleships. They also have the best damage for 15 in guns for the tier as well. The gun handling is at least not total crap, as they have 30 sec 180° rotation time, which is above average for most BBs. The forward gun angles are decent too, at 31°, but her rear angles are worse at 40°.
Speaking off, the armor is fairly good at a first glance, with 45mm deck, 70mm deck sides, and a fairly small superstructure which has extra protection from her 90mm dual purpose guns 40mm barbettes and the conning tower. The citadel is slightly above water, but it is not a turtleback, so you WILL get punished for being broadside, considering the armor is 375mm + 40mm of armor or protection. The 40mm inner plate is not overmatchable at least, which is a small plus. At least, compared to the tech tree Tier IX and Tier X that have 25mm plates under their turtleback.
She also gets points for good concealment for her tier, being among the best, at 13.39km base, 11.7km max.
Overall, she's... a tough and sneaky nut to crack, unless she shows broadside. The guns themselves are a massive dirce roll each time, and kind of suck. When they behave though, usually at range, they are amongst the best 15in guns at tier VIII.
Oh and Roma is voiced by Yui Kondou.
Oh wait. This supposed to be Littorio. Whoops. Then that would be Shizuka Itou that voices her. And Yes, if you didn't know, this is for all intensive purposes SHOULD be AL Roma. The simple version of this is that the Vittorio Veneto class all had striking unique features that set them apart at a glance. There was a controversy a while ago about AL Littorio literally being Roma with a skin, as if you demout the camo, the Roma nameplate is still there. Same goes for our Tech Tree Vittorio Veneto, as it is too, just Roma. In fact, the upcoming Spanish Tier IX premium Victoria will be the first version of Roma that is somewhat different. But honestly, it doesn't count.
TLDR: It's a freaking Tier VIII BB on 80% off. Get it while it's hot I guess. Besides that, she has poor gun handling and accuracy, but strong armor (when angled), and good concealment.

I love this sub so much! I've learned of brands I've never heard of and wanted to return the favor. I created a list of brands we love in this sub with hyperlinks! They are in alphabetical order because I couldn't possibly rank these as we have quite the range of loves!
I thought it'd be nice to include well-known brands for anyone just getting their start in their handbag journey.

• Acne Studios: Based in Stockholm, Sweden. Made in Italy. Known for: Contemporary and minimalist designs, innovative materials, and effortlessly cool style.
• Adelle Stoll: Based in Sonoma, CA, USA. Made in USA. Known for: Handcrafted leather bags with a modern aesthetic and attention to detail.
• Advene: Based in New York, USA. Made in Italy. Known for: Luxury handbags and accessories crafted from premium materials, featuring sleek designs with a contemporary edge.
• Aesther Ekme: Based in Copenhagen, Denmark. Made in Italy. Known for: Architectural-inspired leather goods with a focus on clean lines and functionality.
• Aimee Kestenberg: Based in New York, USA. Made in China. Known for: Fashion-forward handbags and accessories with a focus on functionality and versatility.
• Akris: Based in St. Gallen, Switzerland. Made in Switzerland and other locations. Known for: Modern and architectural designs, offering luxury handbags with a minimalist aesthetic and Swiss craftsmanship.
• Alaïa: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy. Known for: Avant-garde and sculptural designs, impeccable craftsmanship, and body-conscious silhouettes.
• Amélie Pichard: Based in Paris, France. Made in Portugal. Known for: Eclectic and avant-garde designs, including unconventional handbags with a retro-futuristic aesthetic and sustainable practices.
• Anine Bing: Based in Los Angeles, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Effortlessly cool and timeless designs, offering luxury handbags with a rock 'n' roll edge and Scandinavian influences.
• Alexander McQueen: Based in London, UK. Made in Italy. Known for: Avant-garde fashion and innovative design under the creative direction of Sarah Burton.
• Alexander Wang: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Urban-chic designs, edgy aesthetic, and modern luxury handbags, including the "Rocco" and "Attica" bags.
• AllSaints: Based in London, UK. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Edgy and urban style, offering leather handbags with a rock 'n' roll aesthetic and distinctive designs.
• Animal Handmade: Based in Colorado, USA. Made in Colorado and other locations. Known for: Handcrafted leather bags and accessories with a bohemian aesthetic.
• Anya Hindmarch: Based in London, UK. Made in Italy. Known for: Playful and whimsical designs, including the iconic "I Am Not A Plastic Bag" tote.
• APC: Based in Paris, France. Made in France and Portugal. Known for: Minimalist and understated French fashion with a focus on quality materials and craftsmanship.
• Aranaz: Based in Manila, Philippines. Made in the Philippines. Known for: Handwoven bags and accessories inspired by Filipino craftsmanship and culture.
• Aspinal of London: Based in London, UK. Made in England. Known for: Luxury leather goods including handbags, wallets, and accessories with a timeless British aesthetic.
• Ateliers Auguste: Based in Paris, France. Made in France. Known for: Modern and minimalist designs, functional details, and premium materials, offering urban-inspired leather goods.
• ATP Atelier: Based in Stockholm, Sweden. Made in Italy. Known for: Minimalist and Scandinavian-inspired designs, handcrafted from vegetable-tanned leather for timeless elegance and sustainability.
• Baggu: Based in California, USA. Made in China and USA. Known for: Simple and sustainable designs, offering eco-friendly handbags and accessories with a focus on versatility and practicality.
• Balenciaga: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy. Known for: Avant-garde designs and innovative silhouettes under the creative direction of Demna Gvasalia.
• Bally: Based in Caslano, Switzerland. Made in Switzerland and Italy. Known for: Classic and elegant leather goods with a focus on craftsmanship and quality.
• Betsey Johnson: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Whimsical and playful designs, offering handbags with bold prints, quirky embellishments, and vibrant colors, reflecting Betsey Johnson's signature fun and eclectic style.
• Bimba y Lola: Based in La Coruña, Spain. Made in Spain and other locations. Known for: Contemporary and colorful designs, offering fashion-forward handbags with a playful aesthetic and Spanish flair.
• Bleu de Chauffe: Based in Ariège, France. Made in France. Known for: Handcrafted leather bags inspired by workwear and vintage styles.
• Brandon Blackwood: Based in New York, USA. Made in China. Known for: Contemporary handbags with a focus on inclusivity and social consciousness.
• Bolinder Stockholm: Based in Stockholm, Sweden. Made in Italy. Known for: Timeless leather goods with a Scandinavian design aesthetic.
• Bottega Veneta: Based in Milan, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Intrecciato woven leather and understated luxury under the creative direction of Daniel Lee.
• BOYY: Based in Bangkok, Thailand. Made in Thailand. Known for: Structured handbags and accessories featuring oversized buckles and bold hardware.
• Brunello Cucinelli: Based in Solomeo, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Luxurious cashmere clothing and accessories with an emphasis on ethical and sustainable practices.
• Burberry: Based in London, UK. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Iconic trench coats, British heritage, and classic plaid patterns.
• Bvlgari: Based in Rome, Italy. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Italian luxury and glamour, offering iconic handbags and accessories with bold designs and exquisite craftsmanship.
• By Far: Based in Sofia, Bulgaria. Made in Bulgaria. Known for: Retro-inspired handbags and shoes with a modern twist.
• Campomaggi: Based in Teodorano, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Handcrafted leather bags and accessories with a distressed and vintage look.
• Cafune: Based in Hong Kong. Made in China. Known for: Minimalist and functional handbags designed for the modern woman.
• Carolina Herrera: Based in New York, USA. Made in Italy. Known for: Timeless elegance and feminine designs, including the iconic "Good Girl" fragrance.
• Cartier: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Iconic luxury and timeless elegance, offering exquisite handbags and accessories with the brand's signature craftsmanship and heritage.
• Celine: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy. Known for: Minimalist and modern designs under the creative direction of Hedi Slimane.
• Chanel: Based in Paris, France. Made in France and Italy. Known for: Iconic quilted handbags, timeless elegance, and classic fashion under the creative direction of Virginie Viard.
• Charles & Keith: Based in Singapore. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Trendy and affordable footwear and accessories for the fashion-forward woman.
• Christian Louboutin: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Red-soled shoes, bold and theatrical designs, and statement-making luxury handbags.
• Chloe: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy. Known for: Bohemian-inspired designs, including the iconic "Drew" and "Faye" handbags.
• Chylak: Based in Warsaw, Poland. Made in Poland. Known for: Minimalist and timeless leather bags with a focus on quality and craftsmanship.
• Clare V: Based in Los Angeles, USA. Made in USA. Known for: Chic and playful designs, including the iconic "Le Box" and "Le Big Sac" clutches.
• Claudie Pierlot: Based in Paris, France. Made in Europe. Known for: Feminine and romantic designs, including leather handbags with a touch of Parisian glamour.
• Coach: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: American heritage, quality leather goods, and timeless designs, including the iconic "Rogue" and "Tabby" bags.
• Coccinelle: Based in Sala Baganza, Italy. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Colorful and contemporary handbags with a youthful aesthetic.
• Coperni: Based in Paris, France. Made in France and Italy. Known for: Innovative and geometric designs inspired by technology and architecture.
• Cult Gaia: Based in Los Angeles, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Unique and sculptural handbags and accessories, including the iconic "Ark" bag.
• Cuoieria Fiorentina: Based in Florence, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Traditional craftsmanship and Florentine heritage, offering leather handbags and accessories with timeless elegance and Italian artistry.
• Cuyana: Based in San Francisco, USA. Made in Italy, Turkey, and other locations. Known for: Timeless and versatile essentials with a focus on sustainability and craftsmanship.
• Deadly Ponies: Based in Auckland, New Zealand. Made in New Zealand. Known for: Luxury leather goods with a focus on quality and innovation.
• Demellier: Based in London, UK. Made in Spain. Known for: Classic and elegant handbags crafted from sustainable materials.
• Delvaux: Based in Brussels, Belgium. Made in Belgium. Known for: Timeless and luxurious leather goods with a rich heritage dating back to 1829.
• Dior: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy and France. Known for: Iconic designs, including the "Lady Dior" and "Diorama" handbags, under the creative direction of Maria Grazia Chiuri.
• Dooney & Bourke: Based in Norwalk, USA. Made in USA. Known for: Classic American style, quality craftsmanship, and durable leather handbags and accessories.
• Elleme: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy and Portugal. Known for: Minimalist and contemporary handbags with clean lines and geometric shapes.
• Etro: Based in Milan, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Bohemian-inspired designs, intricate patterns, and exotic prints, offering luxurious handbags with a global aesthetic and Italian craftsmanship.
• Faure le Page: Based in Paris, France. Made in France. Known for: Heritage craftsmanship, luxurious materials, and iconic gun-sleeve canvas designs, offering elegant and timeless handbags.
• Fendi: Based in Rome, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Luxurious fur and leather goods, including the iconic "Baguette" and "Peekaboo" bags.
• Fleuron: Based in Paris, France. Made in France. Known for: Timeless elegance and craftsmanship, offering luxury leather goods and accessories with a focus on sophisticated designs and high-quality materials.
• Fount: Based in Cleveland, USA. Made in Mexico or the Dominican Republic. Known for: Handcrafted leather bags and accessories with a focus on quality materials and timeless design.
• Fossil: Based in Richardson, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Vintage-inspired designs, quality craftsmanship, and accessible luxury, offering a wide range of leather handbags and accessories.
• Freja New York: Based in New York, USA. Made in USA. Known for: Luxury handbags crafted from sustainable materials, featuring minimalist designs and timeless elegance, reflecting the brand's commitment to ethical fashion.
• Furla: Based in Bologna, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Colorful and accessible luxury handbags and accessories with a playful aesthetic.
• Ganni: Based in Copenhagen, Denmark. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Contemporary and feminine designs, including trendy handbags with a Scandinavian twist and bold prints.
• GG Maull: Based in New York, USA. Made in Italy. Known for: Artistic and innovative designs with a focus on functionality and craftsmanship.
• Givenchy: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy. Known for: Avant-garde designs and urban chic style under the creative direction of Matthew M. Williams.
• Gucci: Based in Florence, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Iconic GG logo, vibrant prints, and eclectic designs under the creative direction of Alessandro Michele.
• Hammit: Based in Los Angeles, USA. Made in USA. Known for: Edgy and versatile handbags with a focus on functionality and craftsmanship.
• Hemlock and Hyde: Based in Cleveland, USA. Made in USA. Known for: Handcrafted leather bags and accessories inspired by American heritage and vintage styles.
• Hevitz: Based in Seoul, South Korea. Made in South Korea. Known for: Elegant and sophisticated handbags with a modern twist.
• Hereu: Based in Barcelona, Spain. Made in Spain. Known for: Handcrafted leather goods inspired by Mediterranean culture and traditional craftsmanship.
• Hermès: Based in Paris, France. Made in France. Known for: Timeless luxury, exquisite craftsmanship, and iconic designs such as the "Birkin" and "Kelly" bags.
• Hulme: Based in Manchester, UK. Made in UK. Known for: Sustainable and functional bags with a focus on recycled materials and innovative design.
• Il Bisonte: Based in Florence, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Timeless leather goods, including handbags and accessories crafted from high-quality materials with a focus on traditional Italian craftsmanship.
• Irevedi: Based in Seoul, South Korea. Made in South Korea. Known for: Minimalist and understated designs with a focus on quality materials and craftsmanship.
• Isabel Marant: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy. Known for: Effortlessly chic and bohemian designs, including leather handbags with a Parisian flair.
• Issey Miyake: Based in Tokyo, Japan. Made in Japan. Known for: Innovative and avant-garde designs, including the iconic "Bao Bao" bags featuring geometric shapes and unique textures, reflecting the brand's commitment to creativity and technology.
• Jacquemus: Based in Paris, France. Made in Spain and other locations. Known for: Provencal charm and avant-garde designs, offering unique handbags with a playful and whimsical aesthetic.
• Jil Sander: Based in Hamburg, Germany. Made in Italy. Known for: Minimalist and modern designs, impeccable tailoring, and understated luxury.
• Jimmy Choo: Based in London, UK. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Glamorous and elegant designs, luxury footwear, and iconic evening bags adorned with crystals and embellishments.
• JW Anderson: Based in London, UK. Made in Spain and Italy. Known for: Avant-garde designs that blend traditional craftsmanship with modern aesthetics.
• Joseph Duclos: Based in Paris, France. Made in France. Known for: Elegant and timeless leather bags with a focus on luxury and craftsmanship.
• Judith Leiber: Based in New York, USA. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Exquisite craftsmanship and iconic designs, including luxury handbags adorned with Swarovski crystals and sculptural minaudieres, representing the pinnacle of elegance and luxury.
• Just Campagne: Based in Saint-Junien, France. Made in France. Known for: Traditional French craftsmanship and heritage-inspired designs.
• Kate Spade: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Playful and colorful designs, including the iconic "Kate Spade New York" logo.
• Kevin Germanier: Based in Paris, France. Made in France. Known for: Avant-garde designs and sustainable practices, offering unique handbags with a focus on upcycled materials and innovative techniques.
• Khaite: Based in New York, USA. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Modern luxury and refined craftsmanship, offering timeless handbags with a focus on quality materials and sleek designs, reflecting the brand's commitment to effortless sophistication and elevated essentials.
• Kurt Geiger: Based in London, UK. Made in China and other locations. Known for: British heritage and craftsmanship, offering a wide range of fashion-forward handbags and accessories.
• Lancaster: Based in Paris, France. Made in China and other locations. Known for: French elegance and craftsmanship, offering stylish and practical handbags with a focus on quality materials and timeless design.
• Lanvin: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy and France. Known for: Sophisticated and luxurious fashion with a focus on draping and fluidity.
• Lancel: Based in Paris, France. Made in France. Known for: French elegance and craftsmanship, including the iconic "Premier Flirt" and "Charlie" bags.
• Le Tanneur: Based in Romans-sur-Isère, France. Made in France. Known for: Classic and refined leather goods with a focus on quality and functionality.
• Leatherology: Based in Carrollton, USA. Made in USA. Known for: Personalized leather goods and accessories with a modern and minimalist aesthetic.
• Leo et Violette: Based in Paris, France. Made in Europe. Known for: Timeless and elegant leather bags and accessories with a focus on quality materials.
• Lemaire: Based in Paris, France. Made in Europe. Known for: Minimalist and understated designs with a focus on quality and craftsmanship.
• Liberty London: Based in London, UK. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Heritage prints and luxury fabrics, offering a curated selection of designer handbags and accessories.
• Liebeskind: Based in Berlin, Germany. Made in India and China. Known for: Contemporary and urban-inspired handbags and accessories.
• Little Liffner: Based in Stockholm, Sweden. Made in Italy. Known for: Scandinavian minimalism and sleek designs with a playful twist.
• Lo & Sons: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Functional and stylish travel bags and accessories designed for modern lifestyles, featuring innovative features and high-quality materials, reflecting the brand's commitment to smart and versatile design.
• Loeffler Randall: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Modern and feminine designs, offering versatile handbags with unique silhouettes and playful details.
• Loewe: Based in Madrid, Spain. Made in Spain. Known for: Innovative leather craftsmanship and avant-garde designs under the creative direction of Jonathan Anderson.
• Longchamp: Based in Paris, France. Made in France and other locations. Known for: Iconic "Le Pliage" bags, timeless designs, and French elegance.
• Lotuff: Based in Providence, USA. Made in USA. Known for: Handcrafted leather bags and accessories with a focus on traditional techniques and materials.
• Louis Vuitton: Based in Paris, France. Made in France and other locations. Known for: Iconic monogram canvas, luxury travel goods, and innovative designs.
• Lulu Guinness: Based in London, UK. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Quirky and playful designs, including statement handbags adorned with unique motifs and iconic lip-shaped clutches, reflecting the brand's British heritage and whimsical aesthetic.
• Madewell: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Effortless style and laid-back chic, offering versatile handbags with a focus on quality materials and casual sophistication.
• Maison Margiela: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Avant-garde and conceptual designs, offering innovative handbags with a deconstructed aesthetic and artistic flair.
• Maje: Based in Paris, France. Made in Europe. Known for: Parisian chic and effortless elegance, offering feminine and contemporary handbags with a bohemian touch.
• Mako: Based in Seoul, South Korea. Made in South Korea. Known for: Modern and edgy designs with a focus on functionality and versatility.
• Mandel: Based in Berlin, Germany. Made in Europe. Known for: Sleek and minimalist designs with a focus on quality craftsmanship and materials.
• Mansur Gavriel: Based in New York, USA. Made in Italy. Known for: Clean lines, vibrant colors, and timeless designs, including the iconic "Bucket" bag.
• Manufactum: Based in Waltrop, Germany. Made in Germany and Europe. Known for: High-quality and sustainable products for everyday life.
• Marc Jacobs: Based in New York, USA. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Quirky and eclectic designs, including the iconic "Snapshot" and "The Softbox" bags.
• Marimekko: Based in Helsinki, Finland. Made in Finland and other locations. Known for: Bold and vibrant prints, offering iconic handbags and accessories with a focus on Finnish design and creativity.
• Marni: Based in Milan, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Eclectic and avant-garde designs, bold prints, and unexpected silhouettes, offering unique and artistic handbags.
• Massimo Dutti: Based in Barcelona, Spain. Made in Spain and other locations. Known for: Timeless elegance and sophisticated designs, offering leather handbags and accessories with a contemporary European flair.
• Max Mara: Based in Reggio Emilia, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Timeless sophistication, Italian craftsmanship, and luxurious materials, including the iconic "Whitney" and "Grace" bags.
• MCM: Based in Munich, Germany. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Luxury leather goods with the iconic "Cognac Visetos" monogram.
• Mietis: Based in Barcelona, Spain. Made in Spain. Known for: Sustainable luxury and innovative designs, offering handcrafted handbags with a focus on ethical production and contemporary style.
• Metier: Based in London, UK. Made in Spain and Italy. Known for: Timeless and elegant leather goods with a focus on craftsmanship and functionality.
• Michael Kors: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Classic American style, luxury handbags, and accessories with a timeless appeal, including the iconic "Jet Set" and "Hamilton" collections.
• Miu Miu: Based in Milan, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Playful and feminine designs, offering luxury handbags with a youthful spirit and innovative details, including the iconic "Matelassé" and "Madras" collections.
• Min & Mon: Based in New York, USA. Made in Colombia. Known for: Quirky and artistic designs, offering vibrant and playful handbags with unique embellishments and bold colors, reflecting a creative and whimsical aesthetic
• Mlouye: Based in Istanbul, Turkey. Made in Turkey. Known for: Modern and architectural designs with a focus on versatility and functionality.
• Moreau: Based in Paris, France. Made in France. Known for: Handcrafted leather bags and accessories with a focus on traditional French craftsmanship.
• Motherhouse: Based in Tokyo, Japan. Made in Japan. Known for: Minimalist and functional designs inspired by Japanese craftsmanship and aesthetics.
• Moynat: Based in Paris, France. Made in France. Known for: Heritage craftsmanship, innovative designs, and iconic trunk creations since 1849.
• Mulberry: Based in Somerset, UK. Made in UK and other locations. Known for: Classic British style, including the iconic "Bayswater" and "Alexa" bags.
• Naghedi: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Handwoven neoprene handbags that combine durability with stylish, modern designs, focusing on versatility and practicality for everyday use.
• Nanushka: Based in Budapest, Hungary. Made in Hungary. Known for: Modern and sustainable fashion with a focus on vegan leather and innovative materials.
• Neil Felipp: Based in Cebu, Philippines. Made in the Philippines. Known for: Handcrafted clutches and minaudières inspired by Philippine culture and craftsmanship.
• Nichole Kwon: Based in Houston, USA. Made in Italy. Known for: Elevated essentials and statement pieces with a focus on quality and craftsmanship.
• Nina Moniz da Maia: Based in Lisbon, Portugal. Made in Portugal. Known for: Luxury handbags crafted from sustainable and ethically sourced materials, featuring minimalist designs and timeless elegance.
• Neous: Based in London, UK. Made in Italy. Known for: Contemporary and architectural designs, combining modern aesthetics with traditional Italian craftsmanship.
• Olympia Le-Tan: Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Vintage-inspired designs, handcrafted embroidered book clutch bags, and whimsical storytelling themes, combining literary references with luxurious craftsmanship.
• O My Bag: Based in Amsterdam, Netherlands. Made in India. Known for: Sustainable and eco-friendly leather bags, ethically made with fair trade practices and timeless designs.
• Orciani: Based in Fano, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: High-quality leather goods with a focus on innovation and functionality.
• Opelle: Based in Toronto, Canada. Made in Canada. Known for: Handcrafted leather bags and accessories with a focus on minimalist design and quality materials.
• Orla Kiely: Based in London, UK. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Retro-inspired designs, bold patterns, and playful prints, offering vintage-inspired handbags and accessories with a nostalgic charm.
• Oroton: Based in Sydney, Australia. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Luxury accessories with a focus on craftsmanship and timeless design.
• Osoi: Based in Seoul, South Korea. Made in South Korea. Known for: Contemporary and minimalist designs with a focus on functionality and versatility.
• Patricia Nash: Based in Knoxville, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Vintage-inspired leather bags and accessories with a bohemian flair.
• Parisa Wang: Based in New York, USA. Made in China. Known for: Contemporary and innovative designs, combining functionality with fashion-forward aesthetics, offering versatile and stylish handbags for the modern woman.
• Parker Clay: Based in Santa Barbara, USA. Made in Ethiopia. Known for: Ethically-made leather goods crafted by artisans in Ethiopia.
• Peter Nitz: Based in Zurich, Switzerland. Made in Switzerland. Known for: Bespoke luxury handbags crafted with meticulous attention to detail, offering personalized and artisanal designs that emphasize timeless elegance and exceptional craftsmanship.
• Pinko: Based in Fidenza, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Contemporary and feminine designs with a focus on bold prints and innovative fabrics.
• Portland Leather Goods: Based in Portland, USA. Made in USA. Known for: Handcrafted leather bags and accessories with a focus on sustainability and quality.
• Polene: Based in Paris, France. Made in Spain. Known for: Chic and minimalist designs with a focus on craftsmanship and affordability.
• Pourchet: Based in Paris, France. Made in France. Known for: Handcrafted leather bags and accessories with a focus on timeless elegance and French savoir-faire.
• Prada: Based in Milan, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Iconic nylon bags, innovative designs, and timeless luxury under the creative direction of Miuccia Prada.
• Proenza Schoeler: Based in New York, USA. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Edgy and contemporary designs, including the iconic "PS1" and "Hex" bags.
• Radley: Based in London, UK. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Playful and functional designs with a British heritage aesthetic.
• Rag & Bone: Based in New York, USA. Made in USA and other locations. Known for: Modern and downtown style, offering contemporary handbags with a New York edge and understated sophistication.
• Rebecca Minkoff: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Contemporary and versatile designs, including stylish handbags with a downtown vibe and accessible luxury.
• Repetto: Based in Paris, France. Made in France. Known for: Classic ballet flats and dance-inspired fashion with a focus on craftsmanship and comfort.
• The Row: Based in New York, USA. Made in Italy and USA. Known for: Luxurious fabrics, impeccable tailoring, and understated elegance, offering timeless pieces including handbags known for their simplicity and quality craftsmanship.
• Sacai: Based in Tokyo, Japan. Made in Japan. Known for: Innovative and hybrid designs that blur the lines between fashion and function.
• Saint Laurent (YSL): Based in Paris, France. Made in Italy and France. Known for: Rock 'n' roll aesthetic, iconic tuxedo jackets, and the "Sac de Jour" and "Kate" bags.
• Salvatore Ferragamo: Based in Florence, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Italian luxury and craftsmanship, iconic designs, and innovative materials, including the "Gancini" and "Vara" bags.
• Sandro: Based in Paris, France. Made in Europe. Known for: French chic and modern elegance, offering sleek and sophisticated handbags with a Parisian twist.
• Saonara: Based in Milan, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Handcrafted leather bags and accessories with a focus on traditional Italian craftsmanship.
• Savette: Based in Paris, France. Made in France. Known for: Timeless and elegant leather goods with a focus on quality and craftsmanship.
• Senreve: Based in San Francisco, USA. Made in Italy. Known for: Versatile and functional luxury handbags crafted from Italian leather, designed for the modern woman.
• Serapian: Based in Milan, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Luxury leather goods with a focus on craftsmanship and innovation.
• Sézane: Based in Paris, France. Made in Portugal and Italy. Known for: Parisian chic and romantic designs, offering a curated selection of leather handbags and accessories.
• Smaak Amsterdam: Based in Amsterdam, Netherlands. Made in China. Known for: Contemporary and stylish bags designed for the modern woman.
• Soeur: Based in Paris, France. Made in Europe. Known for: French chic and effortless style, offering a range of timeless and versatile handbags with a focus on quality materials.
• Songmont: Based in Guangzhou, China. Made in China. Known for: Affordable and trendy handbags and accessories with a focus on quality and style.
• State of Escape: Based in Sydney, Australia. Made in Australia. Known for: Neoprene tote bags with a minimalist aesthetic, perfect for beach days and everyday use.
• Staud: Based in Los Angeles, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Playful and modern designs, bold colors, and eclectic silhouettes, offering trendy handbags and accessories with a focus on accessibility and style.
• Stella McCartney: Based in London, UK. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Ethical and sustainable luxury, vegan leather alternatives, and modern designs with a focus on sustainability.
• Strathberry: Based in Edinburgh, UK. Made in Spain. Known for: Clean lines and signature bar closure design, including the iconic "Strathberry Midi Tote."
• Tia Woven: Based in Denver, Colorado. Made in Ghana. Known for: Baskets made of Kinkanhe grass that function beautifully as fashion, storage, or art.
• Thom Browne: Based in New York, USA. Made in Italy and other locations. Known for: Tailored suits, preppy style, and avant-garde designs.
• Tod’s: Based in Sant'Elpidio a Mare, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Classic driving shoes, leather goods, and luxury accessories.
• Tory Burch: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Preppy-chic designs, including the iconic "T" logo and "Robinson" tote.
• Toteme: Based in Stockholm, Sweden. Made in Italy. Known for: Scandinavian minimalism, clean lines, and understated elegance, offering versatile and timeless leather bags.
• Tumi: Based in New Jersey, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Innovative and functional travel bags and accessories, featuring durable materials and smart design details for the modern traveler.
• Valentino: Based in Rome, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Romantic and couture-inspired designs, iconic "Rockstud" detailing, and Italian craftsmanship.
• Valextra: Based in Milan, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Sleek and minimalist designs with a focus on fine craftsmanship and premium materials.
• Versace: Based in Milan, Italy. Made in Italy. Known for: Bold and glamorous designs, iconic Medusa logo, and luxury Italian craftsmanship.
• Wandler: Based in Amsterdam, Netherlands. Made in Italy. Known for: Sculptural and modern handbags with clean lines and bold shapes.
• Wicker Darling: Based in Melbourne, Australia. Made in the Philippines. Known for: Handwoven wicker bags and accessories with a bohemian aesthetic.
• Yu Mei: Based in Wellington, New Zealand. Made in New Zealand. Known for: Modern and functional leather bags designed for everyday use.
• Yuzefi: Based in London, UK. Made in Spain. Known for: Bold and sculptural designs with a focus on artisanal craftsmanship and unexpected details.
• Zac Posen: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Glamorous and sophisticated designs, including luxury handbags with feminine silhouettes and red-carpet appeal.
• Zadig & Voltaire: Based in Paris, France. Made in Europe. Known for: Rock 'n' roll inspired designs, edgy and urban style, and luxurious materials.
• Zarah Juan: Based in Manila, Philippines. Made in the Philippines. Known for: Handwoven bags and accessories that celebrate Filipino culture and tradition.
• 3.1 Phillip Lim: Based in New York, USA. Made in China and other locations. Known for: Modern and sophisticated designs, combining luxury with street-style influences, offering contemporary handbags and accessories.

I hope you found this fun! Happy to edit this list for any ones that I missed!