TL/DR: Discovered a broken microwave door after guests checked out after a 2 night, $2,000 rental ($1k/night). Guests politely insist they did not use microwave and would dispute any damage claim. It’s basically my word versus theirs. Am I being unreasonable for pursuing a ~$500 damage claim?
Hello hosts! My guests checked out today after a 2 night rental with 8 members of a family. When I checked inside the microwave for cleaning, I realized the door had a significant crack around the handle. It is only noticeable when the door is open, but if you open the door, you feel it immediately. It will absolutely need to be replaced. I took pictures and messaged the guests in the app, informing them I would need to submit a damage claim.
The guest responded politely saying no one used the microwave. I politely said that it was not damaged when I cleaned the property prior to their arrival, and I would be pursuing the claim through the app once I can confirm the cost for a replacement. The guest responded politely again, saying she has checked with every member of the family to confirm no one used it, and that she would dispute any damage claim.
This is my first ever damage claim after over 50 stays at the property. I am confident that I would have noticed this damage prior to these guests arriving, but it’s basically their word against mine. I have pictures of the place prior to arrival, but this crack would not be visible.
Am I being unreasonable pursuing the damage claim (likely around $500USD for the microwave and installation)? In the past I have chalked up other issues to “cost of doing business”, including an old sleeper sofa that was broken several years ago because the cost of a replacement was not in line with the value of what was broken. But in this case I feel confident that one of the guests broke the microwave.
Additional context - the rental rate was $1,000 / night as it was a college graduation weekend (significantly higher than a normal weekend). There were scratches to a brand new coffee table which I did not notice prior to messaging the guests. I’d be willing to chalk this up to cost of doing business. Otherwise house was in great shape. The guest has 25+ reviews all 5 stars. Guest gave me a lovely, appreciative message when they checked in. I have ~30 reviews, all 5 stars. No one is being devious or malicious, here, but I am struggling at the thought of taking this one on the chin.
Thanks for any advice!

Two species, both alike in advancement,
Spanning the vast emptiness of black space;
Expanding borders create encroachment,
Interstellar ships brings foes face to face.
Whence from their cradles the worlds issue forth
A vast pair of exploratory fleets,
Whose collisions do readily transport
A balanced wave of death whence they shall meet.
Cultural ignorance breeds the great hate,
Foreign ideas permeate all the norms,
Whereas pastimes do, the soldiers lives abate,
These trinkets have the power to transform.
That which matters not to one may save all
For its meaning may be hard to recall
false significance plastered on the wall
May yet bring peace and prosperity all.
—-------------------
The klaxons shattered the silence of the station, blaring through all of the corridors and reverberating off the bulkheads. The cacophony of sounds, as the entire crew leapt from their bunks and quickly grabbed their most prized, or irreplaceable, possessions, grew in intensity as the red lights flared in an oscillating sequence.
The crew were halfway through packing before the klaxons were punctuated by instructions: “All hands, prepare to abandon station. M’quezniok Battle Cruiser is inbound. Repeat: M’quezniok Battle Cruiser inbound. Take only what you must and make your way to the nearest escape craft.”
The drills had been effective. All hands of the terraforming station were accounted for in the various slipstream escape craft within 7 minutes of the initial detection of the inbound warship.
All possessions were secured within another 3 minutes and the small fleet of vessels were free of the atmosphere 5 minutes later. In formation they slid silently through the blackness and away from the approaching insatiable appetite of conquest.
27 hours later, the twinkling effect began at the bow of each vessel as they pierced the veil of reality and speared their way into the void between the planck lengths of spacetime.
Earth Command received them a mere 49 hours, 29 minutes, and 37 seconds after the last of the escape craft abandoned the terraforming station.
The station became another dot on the map of conquest of the M’quezniok, a line that seems to be expanding in all directions away from their homeworld much faster than the humans can build up and sort of defensive perimeter.
The M’quezniok culture lacks subtlety and nuance; it lacks empathy. It only has room for measurable strength and their measure lies in whether or not property can be taken and held. If it can, it belongs to whomever can do so… and that someone, in their eyes, should always be them. They have no mercy and eradicate all citizens of colonies that they conquer. They raze every building that cannot be readily adapted to their purposes. They devour any animals that they cannot use for brute force. They are ruthless and their culture lies entirely in the glory of the expansion of their empire, in an unsustainable need for personal edification for each military commander.
—--
The ground forces commander entered the station ahead of her troops. There were no humans here. They fled like the cowards they were, well in advance of the arrival of her ship. There was no honorable conquest to be had at this location, just the claiming of an abandoned complex. As such, since there were no spoils of individual combat for any of her crew to claim, the entire base was hers for the first-taking. None of her crew dared touch anything in a way that might suggest an interest in it for, the appearance for claiming spoils out of turn could result in punishments far greater than any rewards to be found here.
The Commander walked through the terraforming station, going through bunk after bunk, finding nothing of value and even less of military value. There were no secrets here. There were no riches here. There were… clothes, little trinkets, manuals for the equipment, nasty human food. The commander was greatly disappointed in the raid but, in order for her crew to split the meager offerings that were present, she had to take SOMETHING. So she chose a box on the floor at her feet. This room, like all the others, was a no-frills crew bunk. Like the others there was nothing of apparent value in it. So, she took the box and declared that it was the entirety of her prize. The crew cheered and vanished into the station, each one searching for anything that they might deem of value for their own trophies.
The Commander took the box and returned to her quarters where she opened it to see what personal secrets it may have, what stories of the former crew member who fled the station like a coward at her approach. She found, much to her shock and utter amazement, a vast collection of tales of superior warriors. Brave individuals who, in the times of greatest need for the human civilization, had risen to the challenges within their own society to defeat the misguided evils that sought to undermine the human way of life as it existed then and as she knew it to exist now. These stories, laid out in a bizarre format that seemed to mix a form of graphic depictions alongside the human language as text, reminded the Commander of many struggles within her own empire’s history; times when it took massive competing armies to determine which philosophy should rule their future; times when the death tolls where high and the waste of resources on putting down rebellions was tremendous. The Commander reviewed these documents left behind by the unknown crew member of the human terraforming station and pondered where these great heroes of humanity were, if not already devastating the front lines of M’quezniok fleet.
That’s when it occurred to her. The humans were giving the M’quezniok a chance to prove themselve worthy of living. They were giving the M’quezniok an opportunity to stop their conquest against the humans on their own before they unleashed their most powerful military forces. The Commander, stunned by her realization, dropped the volume of deeds and turned to her communications terminal.
“We have made a grave mistake in violating human space” she began her message. “I have uncovered a volume of histories which outline the capacity that humans have when situations exceed their tolerance. I have uncovered this box, quite by accident, as an item of abandoned loot in my most recent raid. Please review the contents, as I have put them into the end of the this transmission. Consider that all we know of humans through direct contacts is corroborated in these volumes: they always try to allow those who have wronged them to change their ways and, only when those ways are not changed, does it appear that they will unleash tremendous force to utterly defeat and destroy their foes. Note, in sample 17, that the humans in the story, after being unable to reach a peaceful accord with their opponents, wiped and entire sentient race from the cosmos to end the conflict with them. Note in samples 3, 9, and 47, that they have the mind to develop weapons that can be silently deployed among their enemies and which will only affect their enemies, causing them to die of disease whether the battle reaches them or not. Note that, in samples 5, 9, and 62, that the humans have a history of boarding enemy vessels in small numbers and converting the vessels themselves into weapons to destroy huge components of the enemy fleet. Most importantly, in all of the above examples, note that humans will often sacrifice themselves without promise of lasting glory or honor or riches to merely inflict harm on their opponents. There is no methodology of these tales that makes sense in our culture and that, we should all agree, makes the humans infinitely more dangerous than we previously expected. More than all of the previous, note that the humans have the capacity, when needed, to reveal their strongest military assets; single individuals who carry the power of an entire legion of our finest soldiers. Single fighters who can destroy warships without any equipment or weaponry. Single individuals who, according to these volumes, have the ability to turn our very minds against us if we face them in battle. As you are all aware, it has appeared that the humans have given up all efforts to defend themselves against us and the war is, essentially, over. There is no more honor or glory to be found in fighting humans. We arrive, they retreat. We arrive, they abandon what they have built. We arrive, and they fall back, taking all of their observations of us with them. As you can see from volumes 1, 6, 19, 33, 42, 54, 68, 71, and 98, this is when their greatest warriors emerge. It is my tactical advice that the abandonment of this specific box of intelligence on human culture was left as a final warning to us; a warning that, should we continue our actions against them, we will pay the consequences as they unleash their greatest technology and soldiers against us. If you agree, order all Conquestors to halt their advancement and return to the edge of our space.
—----
Humanity Space Command received the transmission. The statement of complete cessation of M’quezniok incursions and a promise that the last 79 encounters, in which humans had abandoned the facilities before the M’quezniok could even arrive to start fighting, would be surrendered peacefully, and permanently, back to human control.
The message indicated that the worlds conquered by force would be the new, permanent, boundary between the two empires and that humanity need not fear for any future incursions. The message also outlined that, should humanity absolutely require it so as to not unleash their greatest warriors in retribution, a list of worlds could be presented as negotiable assets that could be returned.
Human Space Command was baffled. Astounded, pleased, elated, even… but more than anything else, baffled. The best humanity had been able to offer was defeated in every dispute against the M’quezniok. Their individuals were faster, stronger, and harder to kill than humans. Their weapons were more powerful. Their defensive technology vastly outclassed anything humanity could throw at them. Their declaration of cessation simply made no sense and their outlines that they wished to avoid humanity unleashing their greatest warriors and technology as retribution made even less sense. But the top brass of HSC was not about to continue a war in which humanity had no hope of winning when the opposition declared they were done.
The HSC’s final conference on the subject, prior to transmitting the acceptance of the M’quezniok’s declaration, ended with a compound question: “who is this Lois Lane and why do they want her to be the liaison should we have to open negotiations?”

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Anyone own this and vouch for quality? Love the look of it and on paper, looks superb but very little in way of reviews etc online.
Also, any armour in there for the price and what CE rating is it?
Cheers.

Hi guy, we covered the frist saw film in a discussion and would like any feedback. We are pretty new to podcasting and i thought i would have my friend watch Saw(2004) and do a review of it. Thank you in advance, cheers!

I paid for a session with a trainer with hundreds of 5 star reviews, and he was a bit vague about his methods until he came over. But because of all the positive reviews I felt confident that whatever his formula was would work. It basically involved us as humans acting like a big dog disciplining my dog when he did the thing we didn’t want him to do - acting big and scary and yelling - and then following up with a look. And then using just the point and look as the correction when he did that trigger behavior again.
I mean, it was really effective and my dog doesn’t do that anymore. But he seems much more subdued now and not as cheerful. Since this was just yesterday, maybe I shouldn’t read too much into it. But now I’ve been reading all about how fear based methods are outdated in favor of positive reinforcement and I can’t stop worrying that I’ve psychologically scarred my dog. He’s such a sweetie and a good boy, we just needed help with a few bad habits like begging at the dinner table.
An analogy he gave was it’s similar to when my mom could parent me with a look… but honestly even though my mom was an effective disciplinarian I am still kind of afraid of her years later as a grown adult!
Anyway, would appreciate a judgement free perspective.

If you're curious about my thoughts on previous Yakuza games, here are my much shorter (except for 4, thats pretty long too) reviews for Kiwami 1, Kiwami 2, Yakuza 3 (Remastered), and Yakuza 4 (Remastered).
All of my reviews are made pretty quickly after I finish the game, this was written right after I finished but I haven't posted it till a month later because its so long I thought no one would ever read this but whatever I gotta get my truth out there.
Per usual I played the remaster of Yakuza 5. I'm not sure of any outstanding changes or things of note like with 3 or 4, but if something I say is exclusive to the remaster please let me know! I may sound overly praising or overly critical of this game, who knows but please be kind when you tell me i'm an idiot for feeling the way I do! Lastly and most importantly please please please don't spoil future games in the comments! Also warning I'm way too active in the comments section.
Because I am an utter psycho and decided to write a fuckin bibles worth of yakuza 5 ramblings, Part 1 is just reviewing the plot and Part 2 goes over everything else. I split this up last second so there's likely some spots where I say something like "we'll expand on this later" then I never bring it up again, that's because it's probably in part 2. If you want my thoughts on things like the substories, side stories, gameplay, and settings you can read Part 2 here: https://www.reddit.com/yakuzagames/comments/1cvrybw/yakuza_5_a_mega_big_ole_reviewsummary_for_a_big/
The Plot:
Like with Y4, I will discuss my thoughts on each section of the game rather than in one long chunk just because I find it more fun. I'm not even gonna try to not summarize this time because this game is so big it needs broken down.
Part 1: Kiryu
You might often find me compare Y5 to Y4 a lot in this review because they're honestly quite similar games and feel like a package. When I started playing 4 I was worried I wouldn't like playing as primarily strangers for a majority of the game, but one thing they did absolutely right was making Kiryu the final protagonist you play as in that game. So going into 5 I was very apprehensive about starting off with Kiryu, I worried they showed their hand too soon and that it would be difficult to stay invested the whole time.
With this feeling going into the game, I was immediately somewhat losing it over Kiryu being an incognito taxi driver with the worst disguise of all time (some sunglasses and a face mask, don't worry he's literally the only one in the game that seems to think it's a good disguise). Right off the bat, this game feels...sad. Kiryu watching Haruka giving an interview on the TV and storming out rather then defend her to some losers who don't get what ART is, was SAD. This part of the game felt so mundane for awhile, but not in a bad way! You wakeup as Kiryu, walk to work, drive your taxi, and go home late at night (usually) alone. The whole time my eyes were drawn to a facedown picture frame and wondering what it could be, but I certainly had a guess. Kiryu is going through a hard, isolating, and depressing time and you can feel that so well from the game and how they have you play as him. Anyways there's also a random gal named Mayumi that will not leave Kiryu alone despite him asking her to. All you're doing by the end of chapter one is going "Huhhhhhhh?" Anyways Kiryu is approached by two dudes named Morinaga and Aizawa in chapter 2, telling him Daigo was???? Kidnapped?? GASP.. Admittidly I wasn't too fond of this duo at first. One thing that was consistent through my playthrough is that I was completely incapable of predicting anything correctly, and it had felt like these two were gonna be my pals for the rest of the game and I just wasn't clicking with them. Not to mention this weird semi-one sided-romance going on with Mayumi.
In chapter 3, we begin with the most heartbreaking thing that could ever happen to me, Yakuza 3 superfan. Kiryu has been pushed out of running the orphanage by a lady named Miss Park. It's all making sense now. He does it so the orphanage can have money and so Haruka can follow her dreams. DOESNT MAKE IT EASIER TO DEAL WITH FOR ME :( . Then we meet Watase, first thoughts? I was like "god I hope this guy isn't the main villain he's kinda lame" Soon after we meet Aoyama and I thought literally the same thing. Clearly by this point in the game I didn't have the highest hopes. I was mostly sad and not liking most of the new characters. But then... things take a turn.
Mayumi was actually a spy! thank god honestly. Kiryu meets Aoyama again but then Morinaga shows up and fuckin kills Aoyama and says he buried Aizawa alive HOLY SHIT? and then soon after I'm told Majima is fucking dead. Figured he wasn't actually dead cuz I've seen pictures of him from later games but holy shit I somehow cried just at the THOUGHT of him being dead. Also at some point here we met a detective who is an important player in this story but at this point not too integral. Also before Kiryu leaves he picks up the picture frame and its the orphanage ;-;
Kiryu final thoughts: This part of the game was fantastic. I'm so glad they started with Kiryu in this case despite my initial unsureness with it. Chapter 4 especially is when everything really falls into place and starts going 100 miles an hour but I also love the slowness of the previous 3 chapters. I do wish we got more Morinaga as this is unfortunately the last we hear of him despite this being a wonderful set up to a really interesting villain. Mayumi was a pretty shit character per seemingly always with any full grown woman in Yakuza games. While I think it's cool she was secretly a spy she was clearly an afterthought as we never hear about her again so that's cool. Basically a mixed bag of new characters overall.
Part 2: Saejima
I jokingly said to myself "Wouldn't it be funny if I had to spend half of this section breaking out of prison again. Thank god that's not the case." and continued hanging out with Majima until I was arrested for two more years of serving my sentence and OH NO IM BACK IN THE BUILDING.
Yeah I was VERY unsure about breaking out of prison again being a good call. Thankfully, and sorry to Y4, this is a much better prison sequence. Another thing I was really unsure about was BALD SAEJIMA! But actually... it kinda slays harder? In Y4 he looks like that guy from the game The Hatred (an insult) maybe it wouldn't be so bad if bro washed or brushed it but he never did and so instead bald was a slay. Anyways We're dropped in at nearly the end of Saejima's serving period with his group of friends/cellmates, newest one being some dude named Baba. We are relentlessly tortured by the scariest man I've ever seen, Viktor Zsasz-I MEAN! Kugihara. Who's honestly scarier looking then Zsasz somehow. But it is ON because Viktor Zsasz framed my bestie Baba and I will not let that slide so I beat the fuck out of him and it's revealed Zsasz was instructed to be a dick to me. By who??????????????????? Then it's double revealed to me that Majima is dead and I'm sad all over again :(
Turns out our warden is actually really chill and nice and somewhat tries to help us survive. What a breath of fresh air after Satan (Saito) from Y4. This guy is so cool infact we are encouraged to break out by him. So Baba and I do in the dead of the night and tell me why I cried over leaving my two other cellmates ;_; they were such bros. Zsasz hinders my escape and we fight, but my absolute PAL Himura fuckin shoots him it was an amazing turn of events and I cheered so loud and was devastated to leave him behind but anyways-
FUCK YEA SNOW MOBILES (they were kinda jank to control honestly but its the thought that counts). I am so glad I didn't know I was going to be fighting a bear going into this because that was easily the most camp thing ever and so hilarious. Then some old guy saves me (and later Baba) and we chill in the mountains for a little while. The mountain has a whole crazy detailed side story of it's own that I'll explain in more detail later but basically it was cool.
So then a ton of important stuff happens in Tsukimino, most notably we hang out with Baba in a bar which is great because I love Baba and him and I are super tight and he's easily the only person I could ever trust at this point without potential for betrayal! :)
Anyways me and Baba fuckin kidnap this guy because his chair is by a sewer manhole? He's gone in a flash so all I can imagine is dragging him down the hole by his ankle or something. Then we talk for awhile, Majima is mentioned woohoo, THEN HE'S sniped! The way I gasped. Longstory short :( Baba is the one who sniped him and not only that he kind of set everything up and wasn't my best pal all along :( Why Baba Why? Then Baba basically confesses his love for Saejima and can't go through with killing him, AAAAAAND Im back on the Baba train. That detective I mentioned from earlier arrests Saejima but not to throw him back in jail, to assemble the Yakuza avengers.
Final Saejima thoughts: This was shockingly fantastic. I was probably least impressed with Saejima's section in Y4, so it was shocking to have basically the same structure and general narrative beats but done well. It wasn't perfect, I didn't love it as much as Kiryu's section as I'm partial to a slow burn, but it was fun I have no real complaints, except MAYBE more then one chapter in Tsukimino would be a better choice.
Part 3 (first half): Haruka
I did not know I was going to get the HONOR of playing Haruka going into this game. We start off very strong, dancing to the greatest song of all time "So Much More." I mean we really get the full idol experience here with mean ass teachers and shady management. I didn't expect to get an Idol simulator in my Yakuza game but it might be the best thing ever. I decided right off the bat to put everything I had into this section of the game so immediately I did literally everything I could. Most of this chapter feels like a bit of a reflection of Kiryu's were working and going back home alone, it's all as monotonous and isolating as can be (except you're a predebut idol) and I love this. We quickly meet a girl who will serve as my bestie named Akari and yes I indeed would die for her thank you. Meeting Akari introduces us to this sections version of combat, DANCE BATTLES! I know some people might be disappointed you don't get to punch people as Haruka, and I get that, but this feels like a more genuine gameplay style for her character. It's hard to imagine Haruka fighting thugs in the street due to her personality (not that i'd be against it, especially after that weird virtual reality game where I get to wack dudes with a wand) plus I found this gameplay style so refreshing. I was never groaning or sighing because I had to dance against someone. I think it helps that I wasn't forced to do it 15 times in a row walking down the street, but I had the option to most of the time unless it was part of a quest. Maybe that's how all the gameplay should be? I don't mind being approached by thugs sometimes but it always feels like it happens too often in these games and with getting the option to while getting to walk around carefree otherwise in Haruka's section was just SO NICE.
Anyways, We get the whole set up here, we are participating in a competition show that will single handedly set the course for our debut. We're competing against this band called T-set. I hate them so much. They're so mean :(. At some point we see Miss Park absolutely SLAY and tell off Haruka's dance teacher and she doesn't take his shit at all. At this point I was like "Uh ohhhh I don't wanna like her but...she kinda rocks" my decent into stanning Miss Park only continues from there. We have to go convince some guy named Christina (interesting name to take but also a slay, much respect to Mr. Christina and his fedora) to be our new dance instructor. This causes drama with me and Akari which devastated me because I love Akari but we made up like immediately so it's chill.
Then at one point, I forgot the context, Haruka is shopping for a gift for Miss Park when stupid T-set shows up and STEPS ON THE BROACH I BOUGHT FOR HER. I was back and forth on them until now, now they may burn in hell. Especially after they made Haruka get on her knees and beg for forgiveness like ???? what gives ??? Park shows up and SLAYS and gets rid of them. Park then wears the broach :(((((((((
Then one of my favorite parts happen in chapter 2, Haruka and Miss Park go hit the town and just bond together. It's so stinking cute I wanted to cry. This whole time I was trying to not get emotionally attached to Park because it really felt like she was gonna end up betraying us. But the night continued and we get some mother daughter vibes going, even so far as holding hands????? Also Im somewhat glad I didn't get to wear the outfit I bought at the store with Park because I was going for a Cheetah girls inspired look then realized far too late how tacky that might come off, not everyone is Raven Symone ya know?
Anyways at this point I'm like wow this is the cutest game ever, nothing can ever go wrong, Park MIGHT betray me but I don't even care. She gives us a cool pen and a tragic anime backstory with an abusive ex husband and everything and we call it a night Well the next fuckin day my world crumbles because PARK IS DEAD! She "committed suicide" as if!
Part 3 (second half): Akiyama
I can't tell you how devastated I was to realize I'd only get to play as Akiyama for half of a section of the game. However, I was also thrilled to see him at all. Apparently he's opening a Satenbori office and also he is the one who financed Park's dream to debut Haruka so that's how he has a hand in all this. There is tragically very little Hana, she calls you twice and both times were fantastic but I wish I had more :(. Anyways Akiyama has heard about Park's death and goes to the office and meets Haruka. I didn't think they'd even really know each other and assumed we'd have an interesting reveal that they both know Kiryu later but nah they know each other. It honestly probably works better this way because we don't have time for such trivial things! Akiyama is a fuckin detective now. I don't know why he has been tasked to do this but he does it so well I don't even mind. He quickly figures out Park didn't actually kill herself and they simply need evidence to prove this. I'm unsure when this happens but at some point while talking about the mystery SOMEONE FALLS OFF THE ROOF! It was Horie :( who I haven't mentioned yet but he's my manager and a real pal. Thankfully he lived but we found out that the former dance teacher pushed him off. I think he also killed Park or Kanai did, who knows, either way someone did and they suck for it.
Chapter 4 has a lot going on, but basically the president of Osaka talent is sus and he's also the secret chairman of Ousaka Enterprises, which is a different thing... but sounds similar. Ousaka is basically a higher up family in the Omi alliance, so he's part of the bad yakuza!!! Haruka keeps doing the competition and T-set keeps sucking. She wins the princess league by a landslide. I don't even see the point in a third round if she won both of the other rounds? Is the third round just worth more points? Either way Haruka destroyed them and they suck. Her poor vocal instructor is working as her manager now. At some point we find out Parks ex husband was none other then Majima! Which is quite the revelation. Japan is such a small world, everyone seems to know each other. This does mean that Majima at least hit Park (I think after her abortion) and I think he's like 10 years older then her yet they were already married when she debuted at eighteen... Is it time for me to confront the possibility that my favorite crazed murderer might not be the most upstanding citizen?
It ends with Haruka being kidnapped, (nothing out of character there), and Akiyama saving her. He and Haruka make their way to Japan for the big ole concert Park had been planning. Wow this story is really picking up! I hope nothing grinds it to a sudden stop!
Part 3 final thoughts: God this was amazing, every step of it. My only complaint is I wanted more, more Akiyama and MORE dancing but I might be the only one who wanted 40 more hours of dancing. Detective Akiyama and Haruka duo was not the team I knew I needed but Im glad it happened. I found all of the music and gameplay here SO fun and I loved the plot too. I really liked Parks character. I wouldn't necessarily hang out with her, but I found her to be pretty well written and its hard to hate anyone Haruka clearly treasures, I am very sad she is actually dead because up until the end of the game I kept thinking she was going to come back.
Part 4: Shinada:
We have come to a sudden stop. We start with a flashback to 1997 where Shinada has debuted as a baseball player for the wyverns, don't forget this moment because the rest of this section of the game constantly calls back to it. In the modern day Shinada is a loser who is really heavily indebt and lives in a weird grimey rooftop shack. He also now writes like ? smut articles ? And he's friend with a girl named Milky which is the craziest name I've ever heard. A loanshark who talks about his kids a lot constantly follows Shinada around and takes his money. There was a lot of promise with this gag, like maybe instead of letting me keep the 100k and still acting like I'm broke he shows up after every side mission to rob me but nope. At the end of the chapter we run into a masked man who is frankly just Daigo stealing Kiryu's disguise idea.
Shinada and loanshark (his name is Takasugi) walk around town looking for leads on uncovering the truth of Shinada's past. Because you see, Shinada one time got fired from baseball cuz everyone thought he cheated, oh you already knew that? yeah same but don't worry you'll hear it at least 40 more times. Daigo asked him to go look for clues about this, why does he care? I still don't know honestly. Takasugi is forcing him to go because...I guess money? and he's walking around with me and were acting like friends now for some reason. Shinada is incapable of having any agency for himself, he just does what people tell him to. He also keeps nearly dying like a looney tunes character with shit falling out of the sky and stuff. Eventually we find out the Nagoya family fixed the match and then some guy Shinada used to know does get smashed like a looney tunes character. Skip ahead, were called to help by Milky and she betrayed us. I am sad cuz I thought Milky was a friend for life. Turns out literally everyone Shinada knows aside from the fkn loanshark are evil, even the old baseball lady. This plot was so convoluted I frankly don't understand why they were doing what they were doing, all I know is they were more like a neighborhood watch situation then Yakuza even though they seemed to do the exact same thing. Also when I say literally everyone he knows is evil I mean everyone, even his old coach or whatever. For way too long I thought they meant the middle school baseball coach so I was hella confused. Anyways we then find out that actually Takasugi is Shinada's number one baseball fan. Okay? Anyways
Chapter 4 things finally pick up a little. Daigo reveals himself like anyone ever was doubting it was him, and he also reveals he cares because he went to highschool with Shinada. Is that fr how were connecting this? Daigo got expelled from highschool because he protected Shinada from a rival school. Once again, okay? I guess Shinada doesn't like that Daigo is a yakuza and punches him out the door. I wasn't a fan of this. Daigo goes down pretty easily, pitiful Daigo strikes again. I love him but can he do anything right? Anyways I guess the fight meant nothing cuz they're pals now and go to Tokyo together. We get a cut to Takasugi getting his money back from Shinada as well as a signed baseball...okay that's really cute I nearly cried. I wish they actually left it there but instead Shinada runs away last minute to meet up on that stupid baseball field from 1997 that we cant go 5 minutes without hearing about and we fight this guy named Sawada who was like the kind of mastermind and also the pitcher. Had Sawada not thrown an easy pitch, Shinada wouldn't have hit it and thus been kicked out for cheating. We fight some Omi then play baseball and OMG WHY ARE WE DOING THISSSSSS
Finally it ends and we go to Tokyo
Shinada final thoughts: If you cant tell I was not a fan of this. I found Shinada to be really inconsitently written. In side missions or when he's playing off of certain characters he's quite entertaining and un, but most of the time, he seems to just be a blank slate who does whatever and only talks about baseball. And omg maybe if I liked baseball this would have been the best thing ever but we did not need THAT much baseball talk or constant referencing to that baseball game in 1997. I get its central to his character but it became a meme how often he'd get misty eyed and talk about getting kicked out. Why did he move Nagoya to escape his image as a cheating baseball player when 1) he constantly talks about it anyways, 2) everyone literally knows who he is here anyways. They make it seem like at first he wants nothing to do with baseball anymore but he also goes to the batting cages all the time and also thinks about nothing but baseball. The plot here is just SO hard to follow and not at all what I want to be dealing with after we were really in the thick of things with part 3's ending. I'm not saying it was impossible for this to be good, I think there was so much potential here! Like seemingly all of Yakuza 4, the concepts are there but the execution is iffy. I think it's biggest downfall is when it happens. It would have made so much more sense to make the last section before the finale the Haruka section. Shinada would have felt much better to play as maybe as a part two or even a part three, but NOT part four. The odds were stacked against him being amongst a cast of characters that I already know and love. I definitely was more of a Tanimura fan, but I liked Shinada as a person. His inconsistent writing, unfortunate story, and tendency to be a little annoying really dragged this part of the game down for me.
Part 5: The Finale
This finale is crazyyyyyyy so strap in. I would expect nothing less then insanity from this game. First Kiryu shows up in Kamurocho WERE HOME BABYYYYYY. Were being followed by BABA!! I missed him. We fight for fun or something then we cut to Saejima who is meeting with the detective who tells us we gotta find Morinaga. OH YEAH THAT GUY. So we go to the Florist and we go to the arena only to find... AIZAWA??? The fuck? I thought Morinaga fuckin killed him cold blooded and made me think he was a cool as fuck villain. Only to find out that GASP Morinaga is actually dead. At this point I literally don't believe it because I guess I was in my era of not believing anyone ever dies.
We go to Akiyama who is told by Osaka ceo to not let Haruka perform. Akiayam says hell no. We also find out that Park and him planned to make Haruka and T-set a group and debut them at the same time but I somehow missed this when playing and didnt realize that till way leter. ANYWAY At some point we also see the CEO doing naked push ups in his penthouse which was so weird. ALSO there is a Date-san reveal. The scream I screamt! I didn't know I missed him or needing him so much in a game till I saw him again. Usually I'm wondering why he's even there or what he adds but I finally get it now, he adds being Date to the table and that's all you need.
Then I do a tower sweep at Kamurocho hills and OMG is this what Majima was building the whole time? To be fully honest it's beautiful and im very proud but its so different and lowkey off-putting. Kind of like Majima himself. I miss him. A whole game and I only be hearing about him second hand its not fair. Question, did literally anyone choose Saejima to do the tower sweep? Anyway were on the top of the tower; Kiryu, Saejima, CEO Katsuya, and Watase. We all have to fight eachother to draw out the one true bad guy and also cuz this is a yakuza game, so off our shirts go and everyone fights. Basically everyone gets shot and the bad guy is revealed... THE DETECTIVE. Who saw it coming? I still kept thinking Park would come back or Morinaga but by this point I was definitely suspecting him too. I don't fully get why he's doing all this but long story short he's purging both the Omi and Tojo of nice? Yakuza? I guess? I think it mostly has to do with him making way for his son to inherit a role in everything but thats not further explored till later. Not to worry tho! Daigo has shown up!!!! But because he is Daigo you should definitely be worried because once again he cant do anything right and he gets shot by Kanai. God dammit Daigo. He is now in critical condition, this is the SECOND TIME THIS HAS HAPPENED DAIGO. He's such a damsel in distress, never change.
Baba tells Haruka the message Kiryu had for her, to never give up. He also asks her to come with him to convince to Kiryu to chillax but she refuses. Sad for no one but me. At the New Serena, where that absolute BOP of a song is blaring, Kiryu is sleeping, while the rest of the crew are chilling and chatting. I forgot to mention Akiyama and Shinada briefly teamed up but frankly who cares. Shinada talks about baseball alot here too just incase you were worried he wouldnt. They conclude that detective bad guy is gonna attack Haruka's concert which I will NEVER allow. I guess Shinada's purpose here is actually tha the knows the stadiuk layout pretty well which I will buy in to. Also I believe here Haruka gets told about her and t-set being a band together now called Dreamline. I also dont love this. The idea of it is fine, Im all for a disney channel original movie plot where the bullies are actually great and we all become friends at the end but the issue is they don't properly develop T-set to do that. The short haired girl gets one little moment of being somewhat nice to Haruka then the very next time I see her she's stepping on my boss's broach and making me beg on my knees like sorry but it's really hard to come around on liking them. Even now when Haruka stumbles duing practice they're rude! This is a tragic ending if anything but Haruka seems happy I guess... Dont worry they will be nothing more then Haruka's glorifed backup dancers.
Okay final chapter, and it's a doozy. We send Shinada of all people to go help Haruka at the stadium, I know i just said I get he knows the layout of the stadium but like :( he's literally the only one who hasn't met her. I guess they don't end up interacting really anyways. Saejima is going to go after Majima because btw he's alive and at the top of the millenium tower. Akiyama and Kiryu stay on the ground to defend against attackers and they probably punch/ kick at least 10000 men. All the while Haruka gives her concert. But Baba is lurking and gonna shoot her, I thought he learned to be good again but whatever. Him and Shinada end up having a confrontation that ends in Baba losing and he's about to kill himself when !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my prison besties and the wardon show and up stop him! Oh my god I loved that so much what a nice resolution for Baba and I love that those guys went straight to a Jpop concert just for their pal. Meanwhile Saejima confronts Detective evil man on top of the millenium tower and !!! there he is, finally Majima is here. But he is not having a good time, turns out he's allowed himself to be captured and tortured for the sake of Haruka and now Majima and Saejima have to fight for the same reason. Then! Daigo shows up, while im literally begging him to actually shoot the bad guy but instead they all talk. Haruka is safe from harm (Baba wouldn't have done that shit anyways) and we officially learn about the plot of him attempting to put his son in charge of everything. Kiryu goes to Tojo headquarters to stop whoever this suspicious son is and Akiyama fights Kanai. Then literally all our friends ever show up to help and that was damn cute.
Kiryu shows up and it's eerie, completely silent with dead people everywhere. We go to the meeting room and the guy behind it all along was Aizawa. I definitely did not see that coming because I forgot he existed. But I suppose thats the point, he was so unassuming. I guess that means Morinaga actually was dead all along. We fight Aizawa while Haruka sings a song that seems very pointed at Kiryu wins (duh) but he is not doing well and tries to make his way through the streets. Meanwhile Haruka announces her retirement because she cant hide who she is or stay away from her family any longer and runs away to find Kiryu and THE GAME ENDS. Other games gave me a after credits scene that somewhat eased my concerns, but 5 is a overall very sad game and it's scene is her managing to him but he's bleeding out in the streets and falls unconcious in her arms.
Finale final thoughts: This was quite the finale! It was much better then Shinada's section but it was still a bit messy and left a lot of plot threads up in the air or had some unfortunate revelations. Nothing bad but things I think shouldve maybe been revealed earlier, like Aizawa. Only finding out with like 20 minutes of the game to go makes it feel too empty or even rushed when we know this game is otherwise not rushed at all. I was a little sad about the ending, I don't think it was bad at all I was just sad. The whole time I imagined it ending with the whole gang going to Haruka's concert and having a good time. For once I dont think the game fully dropped the ball on the finale like they tend to do so I commend it for that.
TLDOverall plot final thoughts: As a whole this is one of the most well written Yakuza stories since Yakuza 3 (obviously in my opinion). I can see that for some people all the plot twists and surprises might have felt like too much but I loved it, I never once could predict where this game was going. Morinaga dying off screen was such a let down and missed opportunity, at the end of Kiryu's section I was thinking he was going to be the best Yakuza villain in awhile but instead he went out in such a lame way. I do kinda wonder who killed him, I assumed it was just the detective guy but Aizawa seemed at least somewhat sad about Morinaga's death. I wonder if that was all a show? Another thing I dislike not just because of how it went, but also that it ended up going no where, Mayumi. They made quite the big deal about her at first and I do like the plot twist that she was a spy, but she wasn't even really acting any different when she was in spy mode and in normal mode. Plus you literally never see her again. I think Saejima's section was just very reminicent of his in 4, but done well. Aside from it taking quite so long to get to the city, by the time you leave it feels slightly rushed. I think the chapter in the woods didnt need to be its own thing. Absolutely no notes with Haruka, only that I'm sad this is all we will see of Park, I found her to be a really interesting character. Akiyama is where my main issues arise, only because I really do think he needed his whole section. He felt a little tacked on otherwise when I think he really didn't need to feel that way. I had hoped he would be part of half of Haruka's section then half of Shinada's where he is used to introduce us to Shinada as a character. But instead we get dropped into that like nothing. I know im probably the only one who cares about Hana this much but I really wish we got more of her. I basically said all my issues with Shinada at the end of his section but once again, I really didn't enjoy that plot. The finale was a mess and unfortunatly left at quite a cliff hanger which I wouldve rather it didn't but Im also okay with how it did. Some other things I wanted in this game was MORE MAJIMA I get why he wasnt for narrative purposes but Im gonna say that in every game. I wouldve loved more Okinawa orphan content. That being said there is way more content for them in this then in Y4 which is wild considering we spent like 5 seconds in Okinawa during a flashback and you never actually see them. It was so nice to hear what theyre up to second hand and some of the side missions expand on them a little more but I am devastated they werent there.
Lastly to briefly compare it to Y4, as they do feel like connected games. Y5 realy does feel like they took all of the concepts of the 4th game that needed to be reworked, and then re-did them to be better. The villains are better, prison break outs are better, and just like way more. I do think there are things in Y5 that are lacking compared to Y4, like general atmosphere, and I do think Tanimura's section in 4, as flawed as it is, is better then Shinadas. Akiyama's in 5 is great, but I love his in Y4 more simply because he doesn't have to share the spotlight. But I really have to emphasize, story and character are done better in Y5, ATMOSPHERE is done so much better in Y5.
TLDR for the TLDR: I liked this game :)
And there you have it, the longest goddamn review of all time. It was a really great game and I wish I could play it for the first time again because it was just SUCH a great experience. If you read this far I am so impressed by you and eternally grateful you even cared to. Please let me know your thoughts! I'm so excited to talk about this game with people. As for my rating, It was going to be a 10/10 until I got to Shinada's section now I'm in between an 8 or a 9. Ill just say 8/10 to be mean.
I am already neck deep in Yakuza 0 so I'm excited to write a much shorter review for that one soon.
Thank you for reading!

Hi all!
I'd really appreciate to download and get a preview of that course, so i know it's worth it or not before buying from the official sales page:
David Lindahl - Student Housing Riches – RE Mentor - Dave
Do you guys have some reviews about it? Any free tips, share & training testimonials would help me!
Waiting for your reviews, cheers mates!

I'd really appreciate to download and get a preview of that course, so i know it's worth it or not before buying from the official sales page:
David Lindahl - Apartment House Riches – RE Mentor - Dave
Do you guys have some reviews about it? Any free tips, share & training testimonials would help me!
Waiting for your reviews, cheers.

I'd really appreciate to download and get a preview of that course, so i know it's worth it or not before buying from the official sales page:
David Lindahl - Self Storage Investing Riches – RE Mentor - Dave
Do you guys have some reviews about it? Any free tips, share & training testimonials would help me!
Waiting for your reviews, cheers.

This is a translation of a 16 min long interview by 银河Jett on Bilibili. In this interview, BLG coach bail talks about communicating with the team in another language, whzy as a player, the differences between Korean and Chinese teams, the importance of winning pistols, the problems present in the team and the upcoming meta changes.
Q: Have you been to China before joining BLG? What’s your first impression of China and VCT CN?
A: I’ve actually been to China many times when I was a player, but I’ve never been to China just to travel. For VCT CN, I think VCT CN plays very aggressive and they really like taking fights. I’ve also faced some other Chinese teams in another game, and the style is also similar. It feels like Valorant has taken on this style.
Q: You’ve mentioned that you used to play professionally and came to China multiple times. As a lot of the audience actually don’t know you very well, can you briefly talk about how you ended up being a Valorant coach? You can talk about what games you used to compete in.
A: I used to play CS professionally in Korea, the team is called WeMade FOX. That team could be considered as the most well known team in Korea back then. As for how I got my start in Valorant, Riot was publishing a FPS. I watched the trailer and it seemed very similar to CS. Since both are FPS games, I gave it a try. I wanted to become a professional player initially, but I’m too old for a professional player so I ended up coaching.
Q: Putting the players’ performance onstage aside, who’s your favourite player or who do you get along with the best?
A: Our team is a unit, so I won’t say that I like a single player. We have a business relationship when competing, or it’s that sort of partnership. But out of the game, we feel like a big family. If I have to choose, I’ll pick players like knight or whzy who are more energetic and cheerful. I knew of whzy and I found him to be a good player before joining BLG, and I feel that he is a very competitive person and is a strong player after joining. Also, he’s more professional and works harder than I thought. He will immediately ask for my help once he encounters any problems or shortcomings, and he absorbs my feedback very well during review sessions. If I have to talk about his shortcomings, I think his mentality is slightly weak. I’m not saying that his mentality is the worst among all the pro players, but since he’s pretty good in other areas, his mentality is slightly worse.
Q: As you’ve been involved with VCT CN for quite some time, how’s your Mandarin now? Which Mandarin phrase do you say the most often?
A: Even though I’ve joined BLG for quite a long time, I’m still not that fluent in Mandarin. I only know some basic phrases that are related to the game, like smoke, left, right, a few in-game terminologies. I can also communicate some basic numbers, but the most used phrase should be ‘play together (一起打)’, I will always tell the players to play together during scrims and official matches.
Q: Since you’re not that fluent in Mandarin, a lot of the audience are curious as to how you communicate to the team during timeouts.
A: There’s also coach Jexen in the booth, Jexen knows some English. It’s still fine if the problem isn’t too huge, everyone can understand if you talk about the game in English. Before calling a timeout, I’ll talk to Jexen about where we haven’t been doing so well at, how we can get better and stop the opponent. Jexen will add his thoughts and organise them, and relay to the team.
Q: You also faced Chinese teams during the LCQ, what are the differences between the playstyles and the habits of the Korean teams and the Chinese teams?
A: I have coached teams in Japan and Korea, and I’m coaching a Chinese team now. They all have completely different playstyles. Korean teams like to gather info and find the opponents’ weak spots before they attack the site. Japanese teams like to play in a formal and methodical manner, they play the game like they’re in a regular army. Chinese teams are completely unafraid of taking fights, they’re very confident and it gives off the feeling that they feel like they can win once they start engaging in fights.
Q: I’ve previously watched the vlog from BLG, and I found this moment to be particularly interesting. You were holding whzy and kept on telling him that ‘pistol win, game win’. It’s evident that you place a lot of importance on the team’s pistols and BLG’s pistol winrate is about 50%, which is about 15W-15L. This isn’t considered very good or very bad in VCT CN, but I’d like to know your thoughts on pistol rounds and their place within the game.
A: Our pistol winrate is about 50%, but this number is a very bad statistic to me. I hope we can achieve a pistol win rate of more than 60%. This is because the team’s overall atmosphere can get very low after losing the pistol round, and the fear of losing becomes present. It’s going to be a huge blow to the players if they fail to win the third round. Also, pistol rounds will have a huge impact on the overall scoreline since Valorant is MR12 so there is a huge difference between winning and losing pistol rounds. The overall team atmosphere will rise once the pistol round is won and the players will be more confident in themselves.
Q: The next question may be more serious. From beating NRG twice to not making Stage 1 playoffs, the team has gone through many ups and downs. What do you think is the biggest problem with the team, and what is your general plan for future adjustments?
A: This is a rather hard question to answer since I don’t know the extent to which I can talk about. If I am to talk about it a little bit, I think I should first make some changes to the players’ mindset and thoughts. The team did beat NRG twice and played pretty well. Before joining BLG, I felt that the players are all pretty good, but once I actually joined the team in person, I realised that it was like what other people said, there was indeed a bit of luck involved. It could be that the players may have experienced some changes in their mindset after they attended Champions, but they’re still practising hard. They were already working hard in the past, and they’re now also working hard. As compared to other teams, our team is a little…how do I put this into words, it feels very jumpy and inconsistent, it doesn’t feel like we’ve improved much. Hence I want to single out these problems and get rid of them. There is definitely a reason behind these players getting such results in Champions. The goal is to revitalise their potential, but it seems that this hasn’t been achieved in Stage 1. In case of the direction, it seems like my tactical style during matches is somewhat different from that of the VCT CN League. I’m not at liberty to go into the specifics about the adjustments, and I still need to give some thought to it and think about what to do. But we’ll show the adjustments and changes we’ve made when we play in Stage 2.
Q: The next question is related to the current meta. What are your thoughts on the heavy nerfs to Viper? In previous matches, many teams will choose mirror comps on certain maps such as Ascent but this has changed after the nerfs. Teams like FPX and teams from other regions are trying out new comps. I’d like to know your thoughts on this.
A: I’ve given much thought to the Viper nerfs, after all Viper has been a stable pick for operating the map, I think the game will increase in pace after Viper gets nerfed and there will be more aggressive fights, we’ve also tried a lot of different styles and different comps. As to why we never selected them in the end, I can only say that scrims are scrims, and matches are matches. In actual matches, it’s more about running a comp that best suits the players’ strengths and let them be more comfortable. Of course, we won’t force a weird comp due to the meta changes, I still need to talk with the players first and run a comp that plays into their strengths best.
Q: The last question is, from your view as a coach, do you have some tips for the audience to climb the ranked ladder?
A: I want to say that when you’re playing ranked, you first need to have good luck and have good teammates, then you can win games. You just need to play the game more if you want to climb. I can also climb the ranked ladder, but I don’t even have the time to play the game. And another point, playing ranked is a good way to train your mental strength, because if you play ranked and still win even after having one or two teammates who disconnected, that would certainly be a huge boost to your mindset.

Amtrak needs to learn from Brightline and (1) use technology instead of human staffing when technology can make a better experience and (2) have more consistent helpful staff.
I've taken the Acela Express repeatedly and Brightline repeatedly, all in first class. Two things are noticeable:

1. Brightline uses technology more, and Amtrak uses human staff more.

When you enter the Brightline stations and lounges, you scan your ticket at a fare gate, which opens. When you board, nobody checks your ticket unless you're in first class (I think), and even then nobody scans it; the attendant simply looks at your ticket to verify it. Onboard, Brightline seems to have just one first class car attendant (who has stayed busy during my Brightline trips, repeatedly coming up and down the aisle with food, drinks and offers for more food and drinks).
Amtrak, conversely, seems to use a lot more human staff. When you enter a lounge, your ticket is checked by a human. When you board, your ticket is checked by a person when you approach the track (if you're in a large station), your ticket is checked again as you board and then again once you're on board. First class on the Acela seems to have several attendants (at least two).
Since Brightline was built from scratch, funded by a large investment firm, I'd think that it did a calculation and figured that using tech instead of humans was a better investment.

1. Brightline staff members are more consistent, and more consistently nice, than Amtrak staff.

Amtrak has some really great staff members and some really nasty ones. I've seen some staff on the Acela Express be really helpful, but others have lectured and scolded passengers when I didn't think it was necessary (for example, I've seen Acela Express staff repeatedly scold passengers for boarding the first class car from another coach, instead of entering the first class car from the platform, and I've seen Acela Express staff respond to routine drink orders by stopping, fussing at the passenger for ordering one; in short, some Acela Express staff seems to make mountains out of molehills and be antagonistic where it wasn't necessary).
Brightline staff seems to be more trained in customer service. For example, they stand on the platform and wave at your train as your train pulls out of the station. When the attendant sees you for the first time onboard, the attendant seems to say, "Glad to have you". When I had a problem scanning my ticket to enter the station, the station staff smiled and helped me in. I didn't see any attitude from Brightline, although surely not everyone is cheerful and pleasant.
Overall
Amtrak really seems to have a bad mix: lots of staff members doing things that humans aren't necessary for and some staff members with poor customer service skills and attitude problems. (If Amtrak staff were consistently nice and helpful, then having lots of staff doing everything would be good, but that's not the case.) Amtrak ought to learn from Brightline and replace humans with tech and have more training of its staff. That would likely help reduce costs, provide better customer service (as Brightline's reviews are pretty positive) and increase customer satisfaction, and thus increase revenues.

I've been grinding ranked for the past 6-8 months, and reached a new peak of Divine I on April 10th. Just two weeks later, I surprised myself by climbing up to Divine IV. I'm a support-only player.
But, I was burned out with the grind and the same patch with the same heroes, so I decided to take a break and try coaching some people with the in-game feature.
I was pleasantly surprised by how enjoyable it was for me, particularly when players gave positive feedback and expressed how grateful they were for my advice. I'd written several guides in the past but a 1-to-1 interaction feels different.
So I'd like to offer some free coaching to players here who might want it. I personally think I can best help people who mostly play support and are below Divine rank.
Note: I don't think doing replay reviews is the best way to start. In the first session, I'd like to do a general review of what you play, how you play, and what you think you need help with.
If you find the first session useful, we can do replay reviews in the following ones.
DM me your Dotabuff/Stratz profile and tell me your preferred time slots with the time zone, or comment them below.
Cheers! ✌️

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🪞
Welcome back to the Asylum write-up, where we explore the decade-long slow-motion car crash that is the Emilie Autumn fandom.
Sorry this installment took so long to upload! Just a heads-up, I may take some time to deliver the last one too – these posts take forever to format on Reddit's finicky-ass editor, and my dumb real life is currently keeping me from precious Internet time. Thank you for your patience! You have my word that everyone who pre-ordered the final installment will receive a PERSONAL, HANDWRITTEN letter autographed and illustrated by me, a list of the snacks I consumed while composing this write-up, some exclusive behind-the-scenes secrets, and a pony.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4.1 – Part 4.2 Part 5

Places, everyone This is a test Throw your stones Do your damage Your worst, and your best (...) And if I had a dollar For every time I repented the sin And commit the same crime I'd be sitting on top of the world today (“God Help Me”, 2006🎵)

Quick recap of where we left off. First, there were five to ten halcyon years of pleasant and meaningful interactions between EA and her blossoming fanbase, prominently by way of her official forum. Then, circa 2009-2010, EA's online presence shifted towards sudden anger outbursts, ban-hammering, and an increasingly top-down communication style.
This created a sort of primordial rift within the fanbase, between those who supported EA's right to speak her mind and regulate her own fan spaces however she pleased – and those who thought that her reactions were rude and inappropriate (at best), and that even fan spaces should allow for reasonable, non-abusive criticism of the artist.
Between a poorly-handled book release (see Part 3), the controversial (Part 2) or dubiously true (Part 4) contents of said book, and serious shade from various former collaborators (Part 5), more and more fans had pressing thoughts about EA's work ethic and choices. EA attempted damage control through drastic forum rules that made it virtually impossible to voice any “serious” critical opinion. It didn't work, of course: instead of squashing the mutiny, she created a schism.
Critical fans and active haters started congregating on unofficial platforms.

“WITH MUFFINS LIKE THIS, WHO NEEDS ENEMIES?”: TROLL LIKE A GIRL

So here we were, the early 2010s. The official forum (which had about 700 members in 2006, if you recall) was now thousands-strong, reaching just over 12,000 registered users in 2012 – not all of them active, but still. In terms of sheer numbers and content creation, the party was POPPIN'... but increasingly in parts of the Asylum that escaped EA's jurisdiction, such as Tumblr, where they could speak their mind freely.

You play the victim very well You've built your self-indulgent hell You wanted someone to understand you Well, be careful what you wish for, because I do (“I Know Where You Sleep”, 2006🎵)

In one wing of Asylum Tumblr, a smattering of call-out blogs emerged, which laid out EA's various lies, faux pas, shitty takes, and general deep-seated terribleness in detailed timelines and screenshots (or, short of that, long-winded bullet points). While many such blogs framed it as “serious” whistleblowing and did their best to remain as fact-based and neutral as they could, there was some genuine disgust, animosity and creepiness towards EA on that side of Tumblr; for some ex-fans, “exposing the truth” was mostly justify obsessive hatred, prying and verbal abuse. Some, for instance, felt the bizarre need to side with EA's mother in their estrangement. (One user, with the URL “emilyautumnfischkopf”, argued in a serious and down-to-earth tone - but with zero sources - that EA's upbringing had been nothing but peaceful and supportive until she ungratefully kicked her loving family to the curb for no reason at all. They were later revealed 🔍 to have an alternate handle as “eaisalyingcunt”.)
Either way, through these blogs, a number of potential drama bombs that had mostly flown under the radar were dredged up from over the years – some of which were hard to ignore, even for supportive fans. Where to begin?
There was that nonsense in-joke song, captured twice on camera during the 2009 tour (to very little outrage, at the time), crassly called “Manatee Retard”📺. Or EA's scathing response, in print, to a wheelchair user who found it insensitive that she used a bedazzled wheelchair as a prop to do sexy acrobatics on stage. (“Your offence taken at my hard-won self-acceptance proves that I indeed have something to fight against”, she wrote). Spoken word tracks where she made trivializing knock-knock jokes about serious mental illnesses she didn't have, like schizophrenia and OCD. Multiple instances of calling Britney Spears a “bimbo” and a “Hollywood fucked-up”, resentfully claiming that she only shaved her head because she was “hopped up on drugs” and certainly not because she was “bipolar”, a word the press liked to wield as an insult anyway. (“That's almost like calling someone a retard!” Yeah, heaven forbid.) The meanest, most distasteful paragraphs in the book. Basically everything problematic EA had ever said or written.📝 In retrospect, it had been a long time coming, but it was a lot to take in – and certainly more off-putting, even to less emotionally invested fans, than silly lies about her age and last name.
In another wing of Asylum Tumblr, some fans had had it up to here and just wanted to have fun. 🎵 If Plague Rats had learned one valuable lesson from EA, it was how to crack a joke in the face of absurd tragedy – and the general state of the EA fandom certainly warranted a few.
In 2012, Fight Like a Girl was released. After six long years, three of which had been peaceful, the Opheliac era was officially over. The new album and ensuing tour confirmed that the Asylum had entered a process of glamorous Broadway-style militarization. 🎵📺
The mood board was “Roman general meets Vegas showgirl meets Victorian street urchin”.🪞 The color palette was, to naysayers, “musty pink and rotten, stale piss yellow”. 🐀 The keyword was “REVENGE” (through the power of... self-expression! sorority! brutal assault with rusty medical implements!). The chorus of the title song had an intriguing run-on line about getting “revenge on the world, or at least 49% of the people in it” 🎵 – which seemed like an awful lot, and was widely interpreted (to cheers, boos, or uncomfortable sighs) as a misandrist jab at literally all men on Earth.
The show was essentially a demo version of the musical, in that the setlist vaguely reflected the order of events in the story – but prior reading was essential in order to get what the hell was going on on stage. This one Broadway reviewer had not perused the literature before seeing the show 🔍, and hated: the set, the choreography, the skits, the plot, the lyrics, the music, the concept. (Seriously, you should read the review. It's not even my show and I feel like quitting show business.)
Pre-show VIP encounters, now violin-free, were lorded over by EA's new manager🐀, whose official title was “Asylum Headmistress”. (Interesting choice – she sounds fun!) The swag bags were less substantial than before, and the “greet” part of the meet-and-greet was rarely more than a quick hug and photo op.
On Twitter, EA continued to embrace her “I am very badass” fronting attitude...

Often wonder if cyberbullies r aware they’re fucking w/ a girl who’s BFs w/ maker of the SAW films & is marrying a knife-throwing scorpion. (🐀📝)

...and her taste for needlessly inflammatory statements. About an aisle sign in a supermarket:

If this does not infuriate you, then you're a fucking potato.

(Again with the confounding crypto-ableism, EA! 🔍) She also went through a phase of raging against Lady Gaga 📝, who had stolen her idea of using a wheelchair on stage as an able-bodied woman. 🔍 That failed to convince anyone that she wasn't the histrionic diva that haters made her out to be.
Spurred on by EA's rallying cries and “us vs them” mentality, loyalists turned the white-knighting up to 11. On Twitter, some Plague Rats got into cat fights with Lady Gaga's Little Monsters (what a time to be alive). Others tried to balance out the Tumblr negativity with initiatives like “Spreading a Plague of Love” – a “positive-only” confession blog, whose extreme fangirling, comically drastic rules and hyper-defensive tone📝 did not debunk the increasingly popular notion that “true Plague Rats” were a bunch of authoritarian and hopelessly brainwashed fanatics.
EA truthers and other anti-fans started lashing out at anyone who dared express any positive opinion of EA, solidifying claims that the backlash against EA was just a conspiracy of bitter, hysterical bullies.
All this to say: every passing day brought new reasons for fans to get mad at EA and each other, and everyone in the Asylum was in need of a laugh. It's not easy having a good time.🦠
Leading up to Fight Like a Girl and in the years that followed, user-submission-based meme blogs took off, most notably “Spreading a Plague of Lulz / Troll Like a Girl”. A lot of the early submissions were absurdist humor and toothless, cheezburger-Impact memes (a style that was, oddly, already dated at the time). Those often originated in good fun, and from loyal fans, on the official forum. But there was also true snark, satirizing EA's questionable ethics, outrageous claims, and easily spoofed artistic gimmicks. A new slang of Asylumspeak emerged: Glittertits (slight NSFW), GAGA!!, EA Gusta and all its memeface variants, Get outta mah house!, Are You Suffering?, Fight Like A Goat, [Random celebrity] copied EA (a subgenre in its own right), ...
Most of the “trolling” was directed at unrepentant bootlickers and, to a lesser extent, red-in-the-face haters and creeps. Meme blogs would post joke comments under “serious” or gushing submissions on Wayward Victorian Confessions, and taunt loyalist accounts by tagging them in their posts. When a few people complained on WVC that almost all of the Bloody Crumpets to date had been thin white able-bodied women, and a few fans responded by sharing their dream-casts for a more diverse line-up, the blog was flooded for days with confessions that “X should be a Crumpet” (candidates included RuPaul, Mitt Romney, Nicki Minaj, EA's therapist, and the WVC admins). Farcical shenanigans like that.
Ah, but some people will always cross the line, won't they. EA threads popped up on merciless, bully-friendly snark platforms like Lolcow, Pretty Ugly Little Liar, and Encyclopedia Dramatica. Snarkers with a mean streak and obsessive haters mingled in some of the more aggressive, 4-chan-spirited retaliation against EA – which would be called “brigading” in modern parlance. This included flooding EA's Goodreads page with one-star reviews (see part 4), repeatedly editing her Wikipedia page to include her legal name and birth year, and ensuring that Googling said name would bring up current pictures of her.
All of this compounded agitation fragmented the once-united fandom beyond recognition.🦠 Through substantial disagreements among fans, personal bickerings, layers upon layers of inscrutable in-jokes, and cross-platform telephone games, the Asylum morphed into a booby-trapped Escher room.
Satire blogs were taken in earnest. Earnest fan blogs scanned as satire. Memes would get called out as abuse. Appreciation without attached criticism would get mocked as bootlicking. Obvious jokes made by EA would be taken at face value. One divisive confession could trigger days and days of debate, to the point that WVC eventually banned confessions in response to other confessions. New waves of infighting created a confusing web of rival sub-factions🐀, each accusing the others of being toxic, cliquish, and delusional.
The shared fantasy was broken, the collective vision had crumbled, no onez was speaking the same language anymore. Fans would jump down the throat of other fans who held almost identical views about EA, except for that one thing she said or did that one time. Everyone had differing thoughts on what should or shouldn't acceptable to discuss, question, excuse, make fun of.
War is hell.

SCORCHED EARTH SHENANIGANS: HONEY, I SHRUNK THE ASYLUM

Would you tear my castle down Stone by stone And let the wind run through my windows Till there was nothing left But a battered rose? (“Castle Down”, 2003🎵)

Haters vs sycophants is not really the kind of conflict where one side can come out on top (if you're participating, you've already lost). But in the long tug-of-war between “grassroots” and “EA-sponsored” fan spaces, the ultimate winner is obvious – in that the former is gasping in agony, a shriveled husk of its former glory, while the latter... is non-existent. This is due in no small part to EA's tendency, like the Czars of old, to settle conflicts by setting Moscow on fire.🔍)
That's not entirely fair: unlike EA, the czar only did it that once.
By early 2013, as EA was gearing up for her third Fight Like a Girl tour at the end of the year, the official forum was... not as lively as it once had been. Not just because of the stifling rules and disgruntlement towards EA, or because EA herself hadn't really posted anything on there in years; the Internet was also changing, and forums in general were fast becoming passé.
This made it difficult for EA to create a safe space where she could talk to fans, and fans could talk to and about her, in a way she deemed suitable (ie, a space she could gate-keep and regulate enough to keep it completely free from negative criticism). Social media was a minefield; she still posted regularly, but didn't interact very much. So EA and the Headmistress came up with a way to filter out the unbelievers: an official fan club📝, aptly called the “Asylum Army”, with a $100 entry price.
Joining the AA came with a dog tag, a sew-on patch, and a lifetime membership certificate signed by EA and – for some reason – the Headmistress. (Unlike EA's best friend and sound engineer back in the forum's heyday, I don't think fans ever really embraced the FLAG-era manager as part of the Asylum in-group. She came across more as a coordinator / businessperson / adult chaperone, at best.🐀) So, slightly better goodies than you'd get by joining the other AA 🔍 ... but not by much. The main appeal was that members would have access to exclusive content, special merch, giveaways, early bird tickets for future shows, and regular video chats with EA.
The concept itself drew a fair amount of criticism, as you can imagine. Between the name🐀, the price, and the inherent gatekeeping of a pay-to-join fanclub, many balked at the monetizing of a concept that had once (like, three years back) been significantly more DIY, grassroots, and inclusive. 📝🐀
Then again, many also longed for a positive, drama-free space where fans could just be fans. And while the creation of the AA was generally recognized as a quick cashgrab, a lot of people were surprisingly cool with it. EA was trying to finance her dream musical, after all – although a number of fans wished she had gone about raising funds in a less sketchy way.
So around 400 fans shelled out (which, according to the Headmistress📝, “basically cover[ed] the cost of running the fanclub itself – keeping the database up, website, etc.”). Enough for a close-knit, but sizable community. But already, there was a conflict of interest: a high fanclub entry fee essentially demands that you pledge loyalty to the artist over loyalty to your fellow fans, who wish to join but can't afford to. Sharing, caring, and ensuring no one felt left out were some of the more positive values cultivated in the fandom... but leaking exclusive content would surely piss off other paying members🐀, and make EA feel betrayed all over again. (And she had barely just started to mellow out on social media!)
...But then again, this is the internet. After the first month of secret AA drops (lyric sheets, some photoshoot outtakes – nothing too juicy, really), there were, yes, some leaks. EA was predictably miffed, and retaliated by... ghosting the fanclub for weeks at a time in its first few months of existence (great look!). She eventually found the “solution” to her problem, by providing something you couldn't right-click-save (and which had been part of the promised perks to begin with): live interaction.
Over webcam, she was her usual in-person bubbly, charming, funny self. Everyone seemingly had a good time during the fanclub video chat, and this gave people faith and hope.
There were a few more events, giveaways, etc. As promised, ahead of the fall 2013 tour (the last one to date, it would turn out), AA members got priority access to show tickets and VIP bundles. The latter were much pricier than before, and only included soundcheck, a photo-op, and three goodies: a tin of loose-leaf tea, a signed printer-paper setlist, and a small flag that said “F.L.A.G.”.🔍 Some stuff continued to leak – but, as some of the outlaws pointed out (scroll down to the Disqus comments), they were mostly relaying information that was relevant to the entire fanbase, such as updates about ongoing projects (the dragged-out recording of the audiobook, for one).
In early 2014, lifetime memberships were closed, and replaced with monthly, quarterly and yearly subscription tiers. Bizarrely, you ended up paying $3 more per month if you bought a $99 yearly subscription📝 – but it did include the patch, dog tag, and piece of paper!

Sometimes I kind of want to be part of the cool kids and register to the Asylum Army. Then I remember how it came about, what you could get for the same price a couple years ago, how the whole thing was and is handled, and that I won’t support any of this bullshit. (And then I roll around naked in all the money I’m saving.) (🐀)

Still, a number of fans rejoiced at the affordable monthly option, and joined – if not for the exclusive content and merch (which were... okay, but not much to write home about), then for the friendly, drama-free exchanges with an artist they actually did love, in spite of all the frustration.
For the still-too-poor or still-undecided, there was always the forum! It wasn't as active as it used to be, but a few die-hards still managed to keep the lights on... until, inevitably, Someone Did Something and Ruined Everything. (Once again: EA's wrath is spectacular, but rarely completely unprovoked.) The incident features one notable figure in the Asylum community. Let's call him the Collector.
OK, so maybe you remember the meme I linked to in Part 4, with Christian Grey and the ginormous EA hoard. Well, that's the Collector's collection. The “Violin” promo that I called the "Holy Grail of the fandom" in the same paragraph? Also his. The handwritten lyrics that went for $940? Guess who won that auction. Over the years, the Collector had probably spent five figures on EA merch and shows, and although that fact was a little unsettling, he was a very active, easy-going, and generally well-liked fixture of the fandom.
One day in 2012, shortly after the Headmistress had replaced EA's old Chicago BFF as main forum admin, the Collector's account got banned or restricted over something dumb. When the ban wasn't lifted as quickly as he hoped, he took it... the way one takes things when one is unhealthily invested: he started spamming Headmistress and the mod team with increasingly rambling and abusive emails (lost to time, probably for the best). When that didn't work quickly enough, he tried a different route.
One of the many auctions that the Collector had won, some years prior, was EA's old iPod Touch📝 – which contained all of her favorite tunes and, buried somewhere in the data cache... a phone number. Which the Collector tried calling. And wouldn't you know it: EA picked up. She congratulated him on his sleuthing skills, listened patiently as he made his case, apologized for any distress caused by the unfair account restriction, and then they got married.
Kidding! She freaked the fuck out, hung up, and banned him for life from the forum and all EA shows and events.
After his ban, the Collector allegedly still tried to attend at least one VIP pre-show (one source in the comments says he was allowed to buy some merch, refunded for his ticket, and escorted out). He joined the Reform forum to bitch about EA and try to rally people to his cause, possibly made revenge posts about her on darker snark forums, and continued to hound the Asylum mod team. So in June 2014, EA came up with a radical and unexpected fix to the Collector problem.

The official Asylum Fan Forum has been shut down permanently. I have personally paid thousands of dollars each year to keep the forum safe and secure for you ... Unfortunately, the forum has not been kept safe and secure for me, a truth which disappoints me greatly, instead becoming a place where people who have physically threatened myself and my staff prey upon forum members, pressuring them to contact me and my staff on their behalf. If the gullible wish to humor my stalkers (who live in their parent’s basement at age 30 something) and thus put me in danger, they may do it on their own dime. They may also fuck off, because stupidity can kill, and I won’t be your victim. To those who enjoyed the forum, you know who to thank for its closure. (“On the closing of the Asylum Forum”)

Voilà! This is how a decade-long archive of shared history ends: not with a bang, but with a dirty delete and a sod-off communiqué.
The obliteration of the forum took everyone by surprise...

I was actually on the forum when it was taken down. I was navigating between posts and when I went to click on a different board, an error message came up. I honestly cried a little, I'm not ashamed to say. (WVC admin on Reddit, 2024)

...and I do mean everyone:

Chicago BFF / ex-admin, the next morning: Whoa, EA forum shut down? Ex-mod: It turns out that if someone spends enough years actively “waging war” to destroy what they can’t have, eventually they’ll be successful. * eye roll * Not even mods got prior warning. Just all the sudden, poof, gone. BFF: Really? She did not let the moderators know?! This is sounding worse and worse. Uggh. I’m so sorry. Such a loss. (...) Ok, threats are serious, but why not just put it in archive mode so no one can post? (...) Sad. I shall light a candle in the forum's honor. (Facebook posts; scroll down for screenshots)

It was a gut punch, especially for people who had poured countless hours into the community, or could have used some prior warning to save years of their own writing from the role-playing threads. One last chance to take a look around the place that had meant so much to so many.

From the wording of the announcement of closing the forum and a number of other things, it sometimes seems like EA doesn't like her fans much. :/ (🐀)

Three months after the forum was nuked, Battered Rose (a venerable EA fansite, which had been around since the Enchant era and had one of the most complete EA galleries online) announced that it was shutting down too.📝 The admin, who had also been a long-time forum mod, cited a lack of “time, energy, passion, or money” to keep the website going... and being upset at the sudden disappearance of the forum. It was, truly, the end of an era for the Asylum.
...Well, no point in living in the past. For those who could afford it, and still wanted to talk to/about EA after that (not everyone did 🐀), there was always the Asylum Army fanclub!
Over the summer of 2014, EA held regular live chats and Q&A's, and... many attendees really enjoyed them, and thought the AA was well worth the money after all. She also quietly parted ways with the much poo-pooed Headmistress around that time.

Just spent over 4 hours giggling, drinking tea and playing guessing games in chat with EA and other Asylum Army members ... No griping, no downers, just lots of fun. I think I like the way the ‘new fandom’ is going and now I’m really glad I finally decided to join the Army. (September 4, 2014🐀; Battered Rose had closed the day before)

The forum was lost forever, but perhaps that was a chance for a fresh start. Could this fanclub thing really be the Asylum Renaissance that fans had been longing for?

...I have come today to a very difficult but necessary decision, and that is to discontinue the Emilie Autumn Official Fanclub. The site itself, and the community chatroom, will remain open to you indefinitely, but I will no longer be making updates to the site. (Newsletter, September 8, 2014📝)

...Never mind, then.
Turns out the fanclub had been the Headmistress' idea all along. EA had been reluctant from the start, and although she really enjoyed the live chats with a safe community of people “who are there for the right reasons”, she couldn't overcome her fundamental discomfort with the concept. Lifetime and regular members would receive a bunch of digital downloads and a -35% coupon on the Asylum Emporium for their troubles. EA said she would definitely pop back once in a while for live chats, for free, just for fun, but to my knowledge, she never did.
And so the most devoted fans were left standing in the rain...

She is happy, she made it. She is fulfilling her dreams, found love and happiness after all the pain. I understand that she now doesn’t need “us” anymore ... That doesn’t change the fact she broke my heart with taking the Asylum Army and the forum from me. Yet, I am happy for her. (🐀)

...while naysayers pointed and laughed, Nelson-style.🦠

I don’t feel sorry at all for the people that paid for the Asylum Army fan club. Most of them knew that EA is an atrocious business woman and has broken many promises before. In fact, I laugh at them. They seriously thought that EA would actually stay consistent with this? (🐀)

EVERYTHING MUST GO: THE ASYLUM WHOLESALE

EA fans were left without an “official” home for about three years. This gave them plenty of time to be annoyed at EA for: not releasing the audiobook on time, not materializing any new project for a while... and the new sin of peddling random, ridiculously marked-up AliBaba jewelry as “merch” on her official store. Think faux-antique cameo pendants and $30 Big Ben rings (...because the Asylum story is set in London, get it?).

The whole accessories section looks like a tacky overpriced English souvenir shop. (🐀)

The fanbase lost a lost of steam in those in-between years, because there wasn't much to stick around for. As evidenced by the positive reception of the AA live chats, even in the midst of unresolved drama, out-loud interactions in a friendly environment have always been EA's saving grace. Considering the amount of online hate, there are shockingly few accounts of bad IRL encounters with EA: most people say that in live conversation, she comes across as a fun, warm, and genuinely sweet person. Some report that their negative opinion shifted after meeting her.
But there were no chats or live shows anymore. There was only social media, where she ignored questions and vague-posted about overdue projects – and the newsletter📝, which was all saccharine love-bombing to promote bland dropshipped trinkets. For fans who remembered the handcrafted merch (and two-way communication) of the early years, it was a bitter pill to swallow.

CONTINUED IN COMMENTS

​

With numerous Shopify partners in the UK offering exceptional services, we’ve compiled a list of the 10 fastest-growing Shopify agencies in the UK, highlighting their ecommerce solutions and impressive growth.
Our article provides an overview of UK Shopify Partners by focusing on their:

• Expertise: What each Shopify Partner brings to the table, highlighting their ecommerce strengths.
• Approach: How they work with clients, including their workflow, teamwork, and commitment to getting the job done right.
• Success Stories: Examples of each partner’s successful projects, showing how they’ve made a real impact.

Here is a brief overview of the full post:

Eastside Co

• Location: London, UK
• Founded Year: 2012

Eastside Co is a respected Shopify Plus Partner known for designing visually stunning and intuitive online stores, supported by strong and effective marketing strategies.
Expertise:

• Shopify Web Design & Development
• Shopify Marketing & App Development
• Discovery Audit & Migration Support

Case Studies:

• Wild Deo: Achieved over 6,000 pre-orders and expanded into Germany.
• Origin Coffee: Increased sales by 23% and conversion rates by 36%.

Blend Commerce

• Location: Alcester, UK
• Founded Year: 2018

Blend Commerce specializes in customized ecommerce solutions, focusing on improving online stores through services like email marketing and site optimization.
Expertise:

• Shopify Design & Development
• Growth Strategies & Retention Marketing
• Email Marketing Engagement

Case Studies:

• Digestive Health Brand: Achieved a 106% revenue increase.
• Droplette: Improved subscriber retention and Customer Lifetime Value by 126%.

Swanky Agency

• Location: Exeter, UK

Swanky Agency is a leading Shopify Plus agency with a strong presence in the UK, Australia, and France, specializing in high-performing Shopify Plus stores.
Expertise:

• Shopify Plus Internationalization
• Ecommerce Data & Analytics
• Shopify App Development

Case Studies:

• YuMove: Boosted conversion rates by 33%.
• Olivia Von Halle: Increased year-over-year revenue by 35%.

Superco

• Location: London, UK

Superco is a full-service Shopify Plus agency known for launching and scaling cutting-edge ecommerce businesses.
Expertise:

• Design: UX Design, Content Creation, and UI Design
• Build: Front-end Development, Migrations, Custom App Development
• Grow: CRO & Testing, CRM Marketing, Data & Analysis

Case Studies:

• Represent: Boosted revenue growth and helped become a UX finalist for The Drum awards 2023.
• Ursa Major: Enhanced customer retention, increasing subscribers by 32%.

Underwaterpistol

• Location: London, UK

Underwaterpistol is a Shopify Plus agency with over twenty years of experience in crafting industry-leading online experiences.
Expertise:

• Shopify Plus Design and Development
• Conversion Rate Optimization and SEO
• International Expansion and Multichannel Strategies

Case Studies:

• LiveArt Market: Launched a marketplace achieving $5 million in sales within two weeks.
• The Couture Club: Increased conversion rate by 28% and loyalty program sign-ups by 58%.

Herd

• Location: Hull, UK

Herd is a Shopify Plus agency known for its innovative approach to ecommerce solutions tailored for ambitious global brands.
Expertise:

• Shopify Plus Development and Migration
• Conversion Rate Optimization and International Expansion
• Custom Apps and Integrations

Case Studies:

• Motorpoint: Optimized paid media strategy, resulting in 21% cost savings and 196% more test drive leads.
• Face the Future: Boosted revenue by 36% and transactions by 43%.

Brave the Skies

• Location: York, UK

Brave the Skies is a Shopify Plus agency specializing in creating bespoke Shopify sites across various industries.
Expertise:

• UX Design & Web Development
• Client Experience Management

Case Studies:

• Ro & Zo: Overhauled online store, increasing conversion rate by 8% and online orders by 227%.
• Drake’s: Migrated from Magento to Shopify Plus, leading to a 153% increase in online orders.

Kubix Media

• Location: Birmingham, UK

Kubix Media is a distinguished Shopify Plus Partner known for enhancing ecommerce businesses.
Expertise:

• Replatforming & Shopify Design & Development
• Retail & POS & Store Operations
• Paid Media Marketing & Email Marketing with Klaviyo

Case Studies:

• Hoodrich: Enabled significant growth and broader international market reach.
• Creep-O-Rama: Revitalized website with thematic redesign, enhancing engagement and conversion rates.

Born London Limited

• Location: London, UK

Born London Limited, also known as BORN Group, is a leading digital commerce agency with offices in London and New York.
Expertise:

• Customer and Brand Experience
• Physical and Service Design
• Behavioral Experience & Data Management

Case Studies:

• RADO: Enhanced ecommerce functionality and content management.
• Billabong: Rebuilt ecommerce framework, improving user experience and operational efficiency.

Inspira Digital

• Location: UK

Inspira Digital is a UK-based Shopify Agency specializing in end-to-end Shopify solutions.
Expertise:

• New Shopify Store Launch & Migration to Shopify Plus
• Support for Existing Shopify Stores
• Shopify E-Commerce Consultancy & B2B Ecommerce

Case Studies:

• Cheerful Buddha: Facilitated international launch with a new Shopify 2.0 theme.
• Westend DJ: Managed transition from Magento to Shopify Plus, enhancing online store capabilities.

Final Words on Shopify Agencies in the UK

With numerous Shopify partners and agencies in the UK, each offering distinct expertise and innovative approaches, our review highlights the fastest-growing Shopify partners in the UK. Their commitment to excellence, detailed discovery audits, and specialized ecommerce solutions are tailored for a variety of client needs.
As ecommerce demands change, partnering with skilled Shopify agencies can significantly advance your operations, providing the necessary support and creative solutions to meet modern challenges effectively.
Bonus Content: You can also explore top 10 DTC Brands in the Lead Foremost 50 [2024].

Hey hey
I'd really appreciate to download and get a preview of that courses, so i know it's worth it or not before buying from the official sales page:
Tai Jaun - Instagram Hacks University 2.0
Do you guys have some reviews about it? Any free tips, share & testimonials would help me!
Waiting for your reviews, cheers

Hi all
I'd really appreciate to download and get a preview of that courses, so i know it's worth it or not before buying from the official sales page:
Alex Brogan - The Master Delegator
Do you guys have some reviews about it? Any free tips, share & testimonials would help me!
Waiting for your reviews, cheers.

Apologies if this isn’t allowed, but here is a link to our album review for Can We Please Have Fun. We have also released videos ranking the band’s first 6 albums, with the remaining 3 albums worth of videos to be released within the next week. Cheers