My bf sent me ig profile of an actress he thought was hot and masturbated to. Not with the intention of making me feel bad- just commenting how attractive he finds her and if I had heard of her before. I feel really bad about myself and when I communicated this to him he said that I shouldn’t because he sees me as equally hot, finds me really attractive, and masturbates to me a lot too.
Edit: for more context- We were talking about bollywood a few days prior. He said he didn’t know many actresses, etc. then one day randomly I think he came across some actresses profile on ig n asked me if I knew who she was, and commented how hot she was, how he masturbated to her, etc. After I told him how it made me feel he hasn’t done it since. But I still feel bad thinking about it

My boyfriend of almost 4 years doesn't think he's abusive and maybe I'm overreacting? I'll try to not make it ramble. He's 52 and I'm 45. Starting at the beginning it was amazing and great. He's the first man I've allowed to meet my daughters (17 and 24). But I did F up and go out with an old boyfriend when we first got together. I didn't tell him about it because it was a non issue for me, I didn't look at us as serious at the time. That was my mistake. But back to the beginning being amazing and this man was going to help me with my depression and help me with my daughters depression. So I agreed to let him and his son move in with me because this man was amazing. He had a great relationship with his daughter that lives in another state, he'd go visit a lot ( that stopped about 6 months in) and he has custody of his son so of course he's a great guy and easy to love. Since he moved in almost 4 years ago he hasn't worked, he does get 500$ in food stamps to help out. He quit his job so he can help out at home and make things easier (mentally) then I assumed he would get something closer to home or something. It wasn't ideal but I have a hard time saying no to people... My marriage with my ex was horrible and abusive and I got my kids away from that and left. So it's safe to say we all have PTSD and depression after 17 years of abuse, physically, mentally and financially. So we need therapy and counseling just like most of the people of Earth. But my BF wants me to get therapy how he says, he wants me to go for my childhood trauma. I tried but the therapist kept coming back to the topic of my BF so I just stopped going because it would make me mad she wasn't listening and wanted to talk about us. So I decided to go when things were better between us. That was another mistake. Since then (about 3 years ago) my life feels like torture and hell. Almost every day he will complain about me for hours like 6-12 hours non stop. I am not allowed to speak during this time because it doesn't matter what I say because I cheated and I didn't get therapy how he wanted. He tells me how my friends don't like me because I need therapy . I wear earbuds around him so I can easily tune him out when needed. He calls me a bad mother, cheater, toxic, white bitch, narcissist . He tells me to shut up constantly. He still won't my work to because "He's holding me accountable" and while he holds me accountable our kids are suffering. We didn't have hot water and heat for a while because I couldn't afford it. He doesn't listen to my feelings because I cheated and it showed him I didn't want to be with him. He keeps secrets from me and gets angry if I ask about them. I texted him I didn't want sex and explained why and he said he does read my texts that I can talk to him in person. After a couple days I worked up the courage to tell him in person and his response was "There are plenty of other women that would love to have sex with me" I said that's cool but I can only speak about myself and then he said I was crazy... We have since had sex. Again I have a hard time saying no to certain people. I counted from September 15- December 26 there were only 18 days this man didn't make me cry by bringing me down for hours. I've had so many days to where i can't eat. Ive list so much weight it worries me. I tell him his anger with me is escalating because he yells more he grabbed me multiple times scaring the heck out of me. But I'm not allowed to speak on anything because I cheated and didn't take accountability and I didn't get therapy so he's holding me accountable. I know I owe him and his son some apologies but he won't get them as long as he is in my life and making it hell. (I'm human) I did not have a great relationship with his son for many reasons but he doesn't have a great one with my daughters either. (He says otherwise). Why do I feel like this is a punishment instead of a relationship?

I (f26) love my bf(m28), mag 1 year pa lang kami. Nung first to three months namin, lagi kami may time mag sex minsan buong week pa, like nagagawan ng paraan na sa apartment nya ako palagi, lalo na during times na wala siyang work or even before na may work sya, di nawawala na maglalambing siya during weekend na punta ako ganun. Now, naninibago ako kasi 1 month na ata kaming walang sex, tho alam nya na sa past relationship ko, di ako nakakatagal ng walang sex 2 weeks max lang ang kaya ko, umaabot sa point na nakikipaghiwalay ako kasi sex is very important sakin, non-nego sya and lagi ako napagbibigyan ng exes ko. Ngayon, busy sya sa new work nya and may business na tinatayo with his friends, and last exams sa law school, I think din na hinid kami ganun ka same vibes kasi hes very maturef na? Or iba priorities? Pero lagi nya sinasabi ako ang priority nya, parang ang daming chance this past weeks na magsama sana kami pero ang daming nangyayari like need nya umuwi sa bahay nila or whatsoever. Wala lang, nawawalan ako ng gana pag walang sex talaga but I think wala na sya sa ganung season. Big part talaga ang sex for me, hindi ko na alam gagawin. Hindi rin ako makapag ask kasi hinid rin naman sya nagaask for it, gusto ko maging mapride siguro kasi naffeel ko na maraming iba dyan na want makipag sex sakin bakit yung bf ko walang gana, ganun. Hindi rin expressive bf ko, kahit anong panttease or pagpapasexy gawin ko, hindi nya magamit ang word na "sexy", sasabihin nya lang "ganda mo naman" tho other people find me hot. Wala lang, nahihirapan ako, para akong sasabog kais sa kanya ko lang gustong gawin yun pero di kami same energy. Haha.
Ngayon pala wala akong gana masyado sa kanya, di ko masabi yung reason sa kanya, di ko alam bakit ako ganito, mahal ko sya pero kulang talaga...

I'm planning a trip to Nainital with my bf. So need some suggestions to not miss out on the good stuff.
Here are some questions to answer: 1. How to reach Nainital from Delhi Airport?

1. What kinda clothes should I be carrying, is it hot or cold in June?
   
2. Where do you think there will be a couple friendly stay?
   
3. What can we see in 3 days and 2 nights?
   
4. Anything to keep an eye out for as a tourist?
   

Any help would be highly appreciated. Thanks in advance.

my bf never wants to do anything with me. we’ve been together for 6 months and coming out of the honeymoon stage. that’s fine, but all we do is sit at my apartment and go out with his frat friends.
over the past week i’ve asked him to come to the pool with me. he hasn’t and would say he has finals stuff to do. i was very understanding, because i get it. i’ve either been taking exams, studying for them at my apartment, or taking an hour break at the pool for some relaxing.
but when i would leave for the pool, he would be on the game. when i would come back he would be on the game or on his phone. i would ask what work he got done and he would say “i’m doing it in a bit.” now his excuses are “it’s too hot.” it’s 87 degrees, perfect weather for the pool before it gets too hot.
even before this i would ask him to plan dates instead of me doing it every time, or to come to the gym with me. all we do is sit at my apartment, watch TV, have sex, and sleep. i did talk to him about it. i said if we don’t start doing things outside of my apartment it’s not going to work. he understood and apologized, but hasn’t done anything about it. what can i do now? why doesn’t he want to do anything with me outside of my apartment or his frat?

Broke up with my bf of two years. He wanted me to take on a trad- wife and work full time once we got married. I wanted to spilt the domestic chores equally between us but he found 'women's work' to be emasculating .
It was okay for me to clean up after him and cook all his meals but asking him to do the same for me was beneath him.
Why would he expect me to send him to work with a packed lunch 5 days a week when he would never dream of doing the same for me?
Why does he consider his job to be more taxing (thus exempting him from chores) when we both work office jobs, work the same number of hours but I also work in higher pressure environment and earn more than him? Why did he feel like at the end of day, he could enjoy his well-deserved rest while expecting that I would immediately go into the kitchen to prepare him a hot meal and tidy up the house?
To him, our responsibilites were equally divided. I would earn an income and do all the household chores. He would earn an income and "be in charge/lead the family"
How could anyone think that was fair?

nsfw trigger warning SA

I’ve never posted on Reddit before I don’t have anyone I can talk to about this, I’m scared to tell my friends what I’ve been going through. Sorry this is so long, and please excuse me if I didn’t follow the rules. My bf(32) and I (23) have been together for about two and a half years. About two months into meeting him, talking, going on dates we hadn’t made anything official but we had told each other that we were the only person the other was seeing. Now during this whole thing I still had contact with a former fwb who had moved away a few years back and was now just a friend. (I’m gonna preface this by acknowledging that I was definitely in the wrong on this part) My bf knew about the friend but didn’t know about the history we had. Since before I had met my bf I had plans to go visit the fwb (not to hook up, we honestly did have a good friendship outside the benefits side of things, and he lived in an area I had always thought about moving to). I decided to still go through with the trip after asking my bf if it was alright and he trusted me, so I went. Honestly did not have any intentions of doing anything physical with the friend but found out he had other intentions and when it came down to it I didn’t stop him. During one of the last nights of the trip, we were drinking and partying with some friends and the last thing I remember is being led to my bed by the friend. Fast forward a couple months and my bf wants us to be official and post each other online. My guilt is overwhelming me and it all comes out. Massive fight ensues, ends in the agreement that we can try to make things work on the condition that we are public with no secrets and he has full access to my phone and location. I wanted to prove that I was better than my mistake and earn his trust back. During this, the fwb who is now blocked, added my bf and spammed him with every nsfw picture and video he’s ever taken of me saying that I belonged to him, including a video of me on the trip, cooked out of my mind, taking him up my ass. Now this is important because I had told my bf that I had never done that and had no desire to. Which was true and had always been true, I have trauma from an ex trying to force it on me and have never been receptive since. Both men in this story knew that. I don’t remember that video, I don’t remember doing anything like that and I know I never would have agreed to it. But the way it stood, it looked like I did it and lied about it. He had video evidence and that is hard to deny. I’ve never seen the video either. But another condition my bf asked for in order to work it out included having my in that way since I let someone else do it. Horrified but desperate, I agreed. We’ve been working on things for years and a lot of things have gotten better but I was never able to let him in my ass. He’s really big and it’s hard to relax when you’re sent into a trauma response. I’m this time he’s gotten more and more desperate and continues to pressure me and has even gone as far as to pin me down and try to get it in, but he did stop when I screamed. He’s always been kind of controlling but it’s gotten worse. it’s always my fault, it always goes back to what I did, no matter the issues it’s because of what I did. I feel like I have to walk on eggshells around him. I try so hard to be the best gf and I can swear that I have been textbook loyal ever since, proving myself the best i can. We’ve been fighting more and mor lately on things I don’t understand and I always end up so confused. So we went on a weekend hiking trip to try to reconnect, a cabin in the woods. Everything’s going nice, we’re drinking, end up getting pretty wasted and start fooling around. Very hot, having a great time. He asks to put it in my ass and I agree because hey I’m feeling pretty relaxed it might work this time! I’ve been wanting to give it to him as a sign of commitment but could never succeed. Things are actually going well this time and he almost gets all the way in. I tell him it hurts and I need a break but instead he holds me down and thrusts all the way in. I’m begging him to stop but I can’t get away and it hurts so so bad I can’t control my screams. I’ve never heard anything like those screams come out of my body. He finishes and I can’t move he comes to comfort me and I can’t stop crying I can’t get control of my body. I feel bad for him now because he feels like he did something wrong. I reassure him it’s okay because I want to enjoy the trip and honestly I’m glad it finally happened. I thought it was over. But ever since the trip I can’t let myself be touched by him and I feel like a ghost in my own body. I feel hollow and trapped. And he still asks to do it again.
I don’t know what I’m asking I think I just need someone to know what’s happening. Thoughts?

My bf and I will be going to the Texas Renfaire early November this year for pirate weekend so of course we're going to dress up! I've been previously and have ideas and can reuse pieces for my outfit, but i need some ideas for his. The goal is comfy, not too hot, and obviously "piratey."
If anyone has any suggestions on pieces, vendors, simple sewing patters, etc I'd be really appreciative! Theres so many options and we're ballin on a budget (cheaper the better, $80-150MAX). I have ok crafting skills and Ive been keeping my eye out at thrift stores but there's not many great ones in my area.

Hey everyone! I’m pretty new to cooking and I want to try my hand at steak again. The first time I tried it I’m not sure what went wrong but when I put it on the hot skillet it smoked up the whole apartment and even set off my and my neighbors fire alarms. I was trying to follow the recipe by getting the cast iron skillet “as hot as possible” but maybe I took that too literally? Anyway needless to say I’m not good with cooking food on the stove I much prefer the slow, reliable oven. I want to make steak for my bf since neither of us eat it often and I’m trying to make new things instead of just chicken and pasta all the time.
Anyway, every recipe I see online for steak even when I typed in “baked” or “oven cooked” I have to sear it on the stove before putting it in the oven. I’m not sure if that’s just to get the outside a little charred or what but I’m not comfortable trying it on the stove again yet. My grandma used to make her steaks completely in the oven, they never went near the top of the stove and I really wish I could ask her how she did it but she sadly passed away last year. I know there’s a way to do it, I just don’t know if you need to oil them or when to flip them/if you flip them, what temperature and how long for them to be cooked at different temps.
I understand it’s probably not as tasty from the oven but that doesn’t matter too much to me, it’s better than frozen pizza. Thank you for any advice or comments and I hope you all enjoy your day!

This is a long one. So I (21) and my best friend (20) have known Each other since we were freshmen. We didn't initially started off great because he thought I was a little bit too straight (his words). He said that he usually just didn't get along with guys and so his best friends were the girls in our group. But in sophomore year we became really really close best friends.
Last year he came up to me and told me he was gay, this is a big deal because where we're from no one ever comes out fearing jail time.
Of course, I had no issues with that we hugged we went and we got food and everything was fine. When he came out he also told me that he had been in a relationship with a guy for three months, I asked what the guy look like. The guy is hot by anybody's standards. This kind of shocked me. My best friend is 5'8 black and fat. Not a little fat. The guy he was with was very attractive, I wanted to say that I didn't believe that they would last, but I didn't say anything. They broke up and till 6 months ago my friend was single.
Then one day he tells me that he's been hooking up with a guy and that they might become exclusive soon, he was going on about how nice he is and how smart and kind. Anyways I again asked what he looked like and he showed me a photo of them two from a date. Once again the guy was traditionally attractive and tall.
After a couple of months I asked my friend how ends up with all these hot people and he said idk?? I was annoyed. I'm 5'11 and work out and I'm a nice guy and somehow I can't seem to find a girl that likes me. A few days ago I asked my friend if he and the boy are still together and he says yes and that he has met his mom and that he thinks he's in love. I told him that he shouldn't get too attached in case the guy finds someone better. No here is where I might be the asshole, saying better sounds really bad but it's the truth.
He got really offended and said that I sound mean. I told him that I follow his bf on insta and he's always working out and that guys like that wouldn't want to stay with him. I also told him that maybe they are just stringing him along till they find a replacement. He said that I'm being cruel and insanely rude and then stormed off. He hasn't talked to me and is not replying. I texted him saying that I'm sorry for being mean, it's just that it's a possibility they don't actually like him physically, I know I wouldn't. I also told him that I'm willing to hear him out. So AITAH? I'm so confused right now! How can I fix this if I'm in the wrong.

Hello all, I'm started to realize that I may not have this dating thing figured out like I thought. I have been rejected by girls that I thought were interested. What's worse is that they arent even trying to be friends. If almost like offended them. I have two stories that explain this and let me know if I read into things wrong.
Story 1: I started school and met this conventional attractive girl in my class. I was shy and so was she however she was very interested in trying to get to know me. So she would make small talk with me. She started to get bold and she called me hot and that my outfits are cool. Eventually, she invited me to lunch with her friends and told me to text her if I needed anything. Lastly she said that she told her mom about me. And she hug me when i decided to come out one time. So I naturally took this as signs of interest. I decided to ask her study one day and she rejected me. Turns out she was never interested and now she doesn't even talk anymore.
Story 2: I met this girl few times at a party. The last time I saw her, she came up and hug me hard. She looked me in the eye and said that she misses me. She also said that she wants to come visit me sometime. Well, she had a bf and her bf grab her away very quickly after that. 2 months she broke up with him and decided to text her up just ask her how she's been since I last seen her. She reply saying that she great and then she asked about me. I took as a sign of interest. However when I asked her about her weekend plans, I got ghosted lol
So we're these girls interested. I'm very confused because they broke the touch barrier, started convos first and hinted at wanting to hang out. Obviously they could have just be friendly but dang I must have committed a sin because they want to talk anymore at all.
Thoughts?

Hellooooo,
So, since I'm returning to Manila for the next seven months — I wanted to try the absolute best restaurants in Manila. Any recommendations are welcome despite how cheap or how expensive it is.
I will also give a list of restaurants I recommend and don't recommend as well in exchange for your opinions. I'll also put what I'm searching for as well.
Fine Dining i've had in Manila

• Gallery by Chele (BGC, Taguig)

This one was special. Amazing food, good technical performance, and unique dishes that send you through a journey of a multitude of cuisines.
Though some of the dishes were lacking in certain aspects — the oyster cake I had was kinda (and sadly) a little bit malansa. No, I didn't get sick but the quality only really dipped that hard on that spot.
A solid 9/10 meal for sure. Good for visitors who wanna visit Manila and kinda want something a bit different.

• Antonio's (Tagaytay)

Oh this was awhile back (2016, I was still 17) but this was so outstanding as well. I forgot exactly what I ate there but I still remember the flavors in my mouth for some reason.
I have similar opinions on this with Gallery except they didn't give me a disappointing dish like the Oyster Cake.
9.2/10 -- a slight cut above Gallery. Worth the drive to Tagaytay.
Japanese Food I've had in Manila:
Note: I've eaten a lot more than the restos listed here but some restos I haven't come back for a long time

• Izakaya Kikufuji (Makati)

Fish quality has gone down severely when in regards to their sushi. I heard from the great vine that their original Japanese fish supplier died of COVID. Last time I was in the Philippines was in October so I don't know if they got back on track.
But oh how the mighty has fallen because this was my favorite mid budget sushi restaurant for over ten years.
Won't give an official score on this one per se but I don't recommend coming here anymore.

• Miyazaki (Alabang)

Great Japanese restaurant for a mid range price in the Philippines. Okay, maybe what I consider mid range may be a lot for others but the food is great considering their fish quality.
Their salmon sashimi is VERY good. That I can say. I recommend ordering their spicy salmon (which is a non-traditional sushi/sashimi dish) because it's flavorful and super melts in your mouth.
The rest of their menu is traditional Japanese mostly. They have REALLY good hot soba though. Super delicious and the bowl is pretty big. You can (mostly) share it but the fatty inside me wants to eat it for myself.
A definite 8.7/10!
Sushi Shokunin (Quezon City)
The food is very good during the first time I went but the more I came, the more the portions started getting smaller for the same price I paid. I am happy that Chef Migs is getting celebrities at the resto. The staff is very nice as well
This goes into the not outstanding category but it's very very good. I do love their spicy salmon hand rolls.
Note: don't expect super traditional Japanese food at this one. It leans more into modern Japanese/fusion. However it's still very good! Worth a stop and my favorite sushi place in QC
8/10!!!!
Ramen Nagi (almost everywhere)
Yes, I know this is going to be my controversial opinion but holy sh*t I love Ramen Nagi.
I know there's many styles of Japanese ramen. Heck, certain prefectures even have things like Gyukotsu ramen which is beef broth (I eat this in Hawaii often) that's not even a super popular style.
Personally, while I prefer my ramen rich. I don't like it overly rich. I like flavorful with a nice broth that warms my tummy and tastes really good. I do love how you can customize your bowl also.
Yeah, it isn't the best stuff in the world but for something that has been spreading too many branches in the Philippines — they main quality throughout branches pretty well. And this is coming from me knowing big franchises often start taking doodoos in quality.
8.5/10 ain't the best ramen but it's tasty ASF
Yushoken/Mendokoro (many branches)
I'm sorry. Here's my controversial opinion that will probably get me downvotes.
I simply think Yushoken and Mendokoro is mid. Why? While their food is good — their broth is too rich. The consistency of their ramen reminds me of Yushoken and while the first three to five bites are good, it's so rich that medyo na umay na ako.
Their tsukemen ain't half bad though.
This is all down to personal opinion but this is definitely a mid ramen joint for me — 7.2/10
(Their fried rice is great though!)
I'd put more but I'm kinda getting sleepy so time for the next category.
Chinese Food:

• Gloria Maris (Greenhills one: note the Greenhills one is the BEST one)

I guess this place is just nostalgia for me so I like it! It's just great Chinese food. It's on the more expensive side for Chinese restaurants but it's HELLA good.
There are some flaws. Their food can be too salty on some nights but thats all.
8.4/10

• Choi Garden (Greenhills one)

Really good Chinese food. Great Peking duck. Almost the same level of enjoyability however the one time I went there, their fried rice was freaking wet.
Uncle Roger would complain if the fried rice was wet like that. The chef wouldn't get an "Uncle" title hahahahaha
7.9/10 for this one.

• Xiu Fine Cantonese Dining (Greenhills)

This place is probably one of the most expensive Cantonese food I've had in the Philippines but also one of the best. The quality of the ingredients is just.....there despite how expensive it is.
Get ready to shell out a lot of money on this one. I wanna cry when I see the bill because this place is as expensive as Chinese restos in the US and the US has gotten so expensive.
But this restaurants hits so many heights on a technical and tasting level. I haven't eaten here for awhile but I heard the quality is still there.
9/10 great great Chinese food

• Eat Fresh: HK Street Food (multiple branches)

My favorite affordable Chinese restaurant. I mean, the prices have gone up there but same everywhere. I've been eating at this franchise for 12 years but I often go to the one in BF because it's nearest to me.
Freaking freaking good food. End of story. It's affordable, tasty, and a bang for your buck in my opinion.
Get their salt and pepper fish filet and salt and pepper isaw. I don't like isaw but having it fried and then mixed with that salt and MSG mixture is a match made in heaven
Overall taste wise this place is an 8.5/10 HOWEVER the value is so good that this resto gets a 9.1/10
(Note my mom feeds 8 to 10 people including my 400 pound half brother who eats so much for only 5000 if it's without my brother then 3800 probably)
Italian

• Gino's (multiple branches)

Another one that is a bang for your buck place considering the quality. Their pasta is yummy and their noodles are freshly made. They have great caprese, salads, and of course their pizza.
Sometimes I order a bunch of pastas and I'm really happy golfer spending 1200 PHP for me and my ex. Yeah, sounds like a lot for two people but I eat like a piggy HAHA
8.5/10
A Mano (BGC and Makati)
Higher prices than Gino's but really really good. You can tell love and care has been curated into their dishes. I went to the BGC branch and found it outstanding.
I have nothing else to say but it's great Italian Food! My brain is lagging out right now but I'll edit this list tomorrow for better imaging and details regarding each entry.
8.9/10
Another place I super love is Va Bene but I haven't been in FOREVER. I heard their quality has been maintained so I am going back.
Alright brain is going blank
Restaurants that I'm searching for:
Sushi restaurants that serve bluefin tuna/medium fatty tuna/fatty tuna at a mid-range to expensive price.
Mexican restaurants that are as much as possible truly authentic because I'm particular with my Mexican food. I grew up in a Hispanic dense city in the US — Las Vegas. I was literally there recently and bought tacos on the sidewalk and it was so good 🤤
Fine Dining Restaurants:
Helm, Metiz, and Toyo Eatery are the ones I've been wanting to check out. I've heard of Blackbird but it doesn't interest me in comparison to the unique experiences of Helm, Metiz and Toyo. However opinions are super welcome!
Italian Restos:
Please recommend me VERY authentic ones. I want my carbonara without cream and garlic haha (NGL Filipino style carbonara is great one some days)
Chinese Restaurants:
Please recommend me anything. I've barely scratched the service of Chinese restaurants HAHA
Korean BBQ
My favorite is Soga Miga, Gogii Yolii (I'm so happy they opened a Las Piñas branch) and Giyummy (I eat here when I'm broke but amazing for the price)
Filipino Food:
I need to eat more Filipino food but please recommend me places with great sisig. For modern Filipino dining I do love Manam hehe
Alright, sorry for the long post and giving too many of my recos. I just wanted to share.
Have a good night!

Our relationship is very new. For context we spend practically every day together.
In the very beginning stages we’d have sex what seems like more often. Whenever I want to have sex, my bf is down, well for 98 percent of the time.
It seems like I’m the one to initiate sex before bed most of the time, a lot of the time actually. It makes me wonder what would happen if I stop. He would get into bed and we’d watch something he puts on tv, and tells me good night, how tired he is, knowing that I’m horny. If I start initiating and getting all hot with him then he gets into it.
I would initiate sex and we’d have sex, but not without him complaining well jokingly that it’s late and I’m always horny when it’s late.
This past couple days while he was alone, he tells me he jerked off every day, at night and watched porn.
Obviously I’m not going to ask him not to jerk off or watch porn, I do it. But this makes me feel a little shit for a lack of a better word.
Advice is welcome

(Mentions of serious mental health issues, suicidal topics)
I (15F) am feeling increasingly sidelined by my (14F) best friend's year-long relationship. Not only has our friendship taken a backseat, but my attempts to navigate the complexities of her relationship have only led to further strain. It all started when my best friend became intensely jealous of the friendship between her boyfriend(15M) and another girl, whom we'll call A. Knowing A previously, i knew her intention was really just to piss off my best friend and it was working without a doubt. Seeing her mentally distraught, I made the mistake of confiding in her boyfriend about A's intentions, hoping to ease my friend's pain. She told me to not tell it to her bf but i did tell him so he knows what he's doing, she got really pissed at me which is reasonable because whether she was going to tell him or not i shouldn't have interfered. I did this primarily because she's blindly in love and very unhealthily attached with him and he's just a dumb teen boy. My best friend discovered this as she was reading through her bfs chats, they share their passwords with each other and accuse each other of cheating which reveals a significant lack of trust between them.
Adding to the complexity is my growing concern about the impact of her relationship on her well-being. From my perspective, her relationship isn't healthy for her. She consistently prioritizes her boyfriend over our friendship(even herself), leaving me hanging while he never seems to reciprocate the effort. It's painful to witness how much she's changed and how little she seems to care about our friendship anymore. I've voiced my concerns to her once, and she promised to make an effort to balance her time between us, but unfortunately, that promise went unfulfilled. I really don't want to lose her but it feels inevitable.
Obviously i want her happy but this situation truly sucks because i thought she'd never leave me for a guy. Sometimes i feel she only talks to me when she needs a free therapist. In the past, my best friend often confided in me about her suicidal tendencies and trauma, which eventually took a toll on my own well-being. I finally gathered up the courage to ask her to stop trauma dumping on me when she did it again a couple weeks later after that incident and that pissed her off alot. She never really does anything about her problems and its always a pity party with her saying she wants to end it. Im her best friend, dont get me wrong, ill listen to her problems but i felt the need to draw a line somewhere. She told me she wanted to end it primarily because of her bf not talking to her because their relationship was in hot water. She has attempted before (her parents are aware) and this topic gets me worked up. She neither takes mine nor our mutual friends concerns seriously. When I tried to involve this mutual friend to help convince her to seek professional help for her struggles, my best friend accused me of betraying her trust by sharing her situation to the mutual friend, despite not having done so yet. She even went as far as to claim that another friend, who badmouths me behind my back, is a better friend because she supposedly keeps her secrets.
Wrapping up, am i the culprit for this entire situation; (from her perspective) suddenly trying to set boundaries with her, hoping for a bit more balance in our friendship, potentially ruining our friendship by interfering in her relationship and possibly betraying her trust?

Im not like average standard hot but I got my thing going on...(I'm a top)
I had boyfriends and fuck budies but in both situations I'm always the one that want the other one more...
With my boyfriend now X (Not a bad breakup) but it's always me who wanna fuck and by the end he had many excuses not to he was.very horny and love jacking off but rarely had sex but god lord does somebody else notice me and he wanna have a fucking marathon.. out of jealousy
And then there the guys I had as fuck buddies it's always when they want it always them telling me to drop everything for a fuck whenever they want it . Never have them do anything related to that when I want it. There was this guy who has a complicated story but basically got a online boyfriend never met in person and we hooked up 2 times didn't fuck but made out (this guy was a crush of mine 10 years ago and he told me he liked me to we had sex 2 or 3 years before this story ) but after hooking up twice ,I was hitting him up and he always had an excuse till finally he said he was feeling close to his long distance bf and by default means he didn't care for me at the moment and this just repeats with a lot of guys.
So why this happens to me ñ... all of them like my body and how I fuck but always leave me hanging when I want something ..... People say tops are usually.the fuck boys but I never have a say on my sex relationships.

I haven’t eaten a hot dog in a long while but today some reason my bf wanted a hotdog. So like anyone else we went to the store to buy them. He cooked them up and suddenly (after I ate one full one and him, 2) this strange salty, iron like taste flooded my mouth. So I told him, and he said he noticed it. So I threw it away, and began to spiral…. Still spiraling.

I am 32F, he is 28M. This summer he turns 29 and it's our 1 year anniversary. At first we both were dating around, but he was my main guy, and if any of them had said hey choose me instead of her, he would have totally picked them. I just think certain things got in the way and I came with certain perks.
I spoke with one of the girls who said she had no idea he was pursuing us both. When she confronted him he asked her to still work things out, but she said that she could tell I was in love and how he should be with me, the one who actually cares. She's a pre-k teacher, part-time model, way out of his league, and I had just happened to agree to hang out with him before she did. He thought she wasn't interested but she was taking things slow. I had several phone calls with her, but my bf denies everything, saying he told her how I was the one he wanted. Did this just all work out in my favor, she rejected him so I could have him and we are meant to be, or did he settle because he didn't get the girls he really wanted?
Another girl is a bar manager and he'd go see her every day mostly with co workers. Says he didn't like her like that, but just wanted to play pool and drink for free. She'd give drinks to everyone. He had lost his ID so he says it was also the only bar he could get into, knowing the bouncers, taking them food from his job. It was a 3 min walk from work. She's a very attractive woman, totally his type, lots in common and basically the female/male version of each other. Always flaunting her boobs, very charming and genuine for the most part. She was actually dating one of his friends, my bf introduced them, but the friend was way younger and hesitant to make things official how she wanted. Apparently he was hesitant since she still lived with her ex, was flirty and would let ppl motorboat her boobs sometimes. It seemed every guy was obsessed with her, and that this could also be a reason his friend was turned off. Another guy in the group tried to do things while she was passed out drunk. My bf caught him apparently one night they were all drinking before anything could happen. When she'd argue with the friend she was dating, she'd run to my bf or he'd go comfort her. He'd bring her up constantly. Saying he was at the bar talking cheering her up bc she seemed sad while working etc. If I was doing this to another more attractive guy, and always checking him out when we're all together, always smiling/laughing with him, my bf would be totally jealous and think I'd prefer him or at least want to screw him, right?
Sometimes he admits to once having a crush, other times he denies everything including comforting her and stuff. Straight gaslighting. The night he cut her off we had a huge fight bc she had been ignoring me for weeks but messaged him to hang out. Not sure if she was just salty bc I had been ignoring her for a while too, and the friend had just dumped her, but I explained how I was overwhelmed starting a new job/relationship, moving into our new place. She just stopped reaching out until that night. I begged for him to admit his crush but instead he messaged her apologizing for my being jealous, that they could no longer be friends, rather than having my back. If things were reversed, my bf would never be okay with me having a male friend like that, so why couldn't he have just said this? Have I been in the wrong all along? He was basically kissing her butt while cutting her off, even told her he loved her (apparently as a friend). I never got over it. He put her and her feelings above mine and I thought this proved he preferred her. It's like im his lame insecure second or third option and other mom helping get his shit together, while she's the fun cool chill hot homegirl. At the same time, he was very ignorant and a raging alcoholic. Going to visit her while leaving his pets at home starving and alone sitting in their feces for hours.
At this time I got a job offer including a 3bed 2bath apartment. His car was stolen and his lease was up. Nowhere to go with all his pets so I felt bad and invited him to move an hour away with me. Before I got the job offer, he had wanted to move in together, so idk if he was using me. It was still the first month of us dating, but the ex he was with for 5 years moved in right away as well, so I guess this is his norm idk. If there was no apartment or car, would we still be together, or did he use me and settle for me? My parents are well off and often help us financially or buy us random furniture/appliances so not sure if he's just happy with all these perks, a babysitter for his pets, someone for regular intercourse, etc.
He's been alcohol-free for 6 months. Got a promotion at work. We just got approved to rent a house, but we argue every day and our spirits seem to be kinda broken. Also just had a miscarriage so everything combined, him getting sober all alone, we've both been depressed and I often say I hate him. I tell him breaking up is whats healthiest but he refuses saying we can make it.
When drunk he'd get flirtatious with women or our arguments would get super bad so that's why he got sober. He says this is another reason it would have not worked out with that bartender and why he didn't see her that way. That he understands how it looks, and he did like her over 10 years ago when they first met/worked together, but now she was just a friend. These are just words and though he'd always offer to cut her off and finally did, it felt forced, and his behavior really was obsessive. I feel he would have been way happier with her. Though he pays for all the bills now, cleans/cooks a lot, stopped drinking, cuts off any woman I feel uncomfortable about, is an open book, I still have so much resentment and feel he only chose me bc he had nowhere to live and no car for work. I feel like an old pathetic ugly cougar. He also wants to get married now and is always asking me to look at rings but is he just settling?