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I apologize in advance for the length of this behemoth Story time Reddit: Last night I was chilling at a camp grounds in upstate NYC and this really cute bartender was on her first day ever for the job, anyways I didn’t even notice her until a community dinner at 6pm when she got some food and went to the bar to get ready for the night because us folks at the camp were gonna party till LATE I’m 18M turning 19 and I had aspirations to be a bartender myself in the familiar country of Mexico where my family operates a gin booze business. she 22F just turned and I was eager to Yk like ask her how her first day on the jobs going right? Now I time goes by we all just chilling having dinner and our rolls out some Gigachad kitchen employees with dessert and everybody fiends the fucking ice cream sandwich bars and I hastily think about the fellow bartenders out the back of the building (it’s the girl I’m taking about whose new and one other girl whom is basically her chaperone because they are her aunt) approach the bar with 2 ice cream sandwiches asking if they wanted the last stock of what remained of dessert 😂 they politely decline and I just give them away to my boys and walk back to the main cafeteria area and around 5 minutes pass people start to clear out and I not really a drinker and not of age to drink in the US (although I have been to other countries to bars that you don’t need to be 21 to drink all fine) Sit down at the bar with the 2 bartender ladies, i start yapping about all the musical bullshit I do in life and the video game I’m developing and whatnot and that’s why I came up to nature to record the ambient sounds for my project idk why BUT then when I realize is that the girl whose new’s eyes fixated on me intensely full German stare and I’m kinda intimidated ngl, so ofc as a good bartender would ask, they ask if I want anything to drink and i politely decline because I wasn’t really thirsty 💀 We start to just chat a bit I ask about how their day went and then that’s when I realize the new girl whose bartending it’s her first day and she’s absolutely drunk out the wazoo, I feel kind of bad because she was about to just go take a walk break and I saw she could barely even move straight 💀 so I ask “so what are some good things to do around here?” They reply really excited that before it gets too dark (somehow they say that and it’s already becoming 8:30 and dark at out) I should go to this really pretty creek waterfall and the absolutely double whammy hammered chick volunteers to take me. Now me skeptical af and realizing that either A, she can’t keep her eyes of me because she’s deadbeat drunk or B, she thinks I’m cute and wants to know me this is why she offered to take me to a cool place. I accept and I have to walk this girl out the bar because she’s in heels and bouncing all over the place. We make it to a downhill section we have to cross and I see her struggling and ask if she needs a hand and she hastily accepts, next thing up her arms are basically spaghetti and rolling with the wind as we make it down this hill her holding onto me for dear life. We start to walk a bit and I start to ask the big legal concern questions that us “technically inclined” men ask like “How old are you” “Do you have a boyfriend?” And “Are you in school?” I eventually get all these answers and we by some will of god walk up to an abandoned dark horror movie looking ass tipi (basically this ⛺️ thing for u non cultured swines) for some reason my hood senses start tingling and the white girl slasher film mindset goes into my mind like “Why the fuck am I about to go in there?” But hey YOLO why not go into creepy dark crowded place with drunk girl? We waltz up into that bitch looking like injured bank robbers clobbering all over the ground because the ground muddy and we can barely fit into the small opening of it, point is in there she starts basically interviewing me fucking speed run piers style and I answer being sober decently competent. Me not trying to make her feel uncomfortable turn my flashlight on to scout the area and we realize there’s some makeshift bench in there so we have a seat. She doesn’t like the fact the lights on and then she asks “do you want to kiss” and proceeds to inform me I’m a weirdo for turning on the light. Now I’m like: “ aight what the fuck girl like it’s dark spooky af out the hell u want me to do get mauled by spiders in this Native American trap house? Then Yk me never had a girlfriend and curious accepts her kiss offer and right as we are about to friggin kiss a RANDOM ASS NPC COUPLE SPAWNS IN AND JUST WALKS UP TO OUR FUCKING TIPI! What are the fucking odds bro, like it’s pitch black basically out and I’m in the middle of the woods, now they see us (we look hella sus at that moment) and kinda just walk away after being like “ooooh cool!” But anyways I get a pretty Alr first kiss, get insulted for being a horrible kisser and walk it off quoting myself “Bro it’s cuz I’m a Libra right?” Jokingly anyways we kinda talk a bit she enlightens me on some personal facts and me too, I ask if she’s had a boyfriend and she says yeah I would had asked how many but didn’t weirdly enough and she’s asked me then if I had ever had a girlfriend and I respond honestly that nope I haven’t and she doesn’t buy it, she thinks I’m lying. She then proceeds to ask me how tall I am and me being a tall ass mf for my race i respond “6 foot 3” and she’s like DAMNNNNNNN ewwww. I’m dying of laughter and ask what’s wrong. I never get a response 😭 Anyways she then decides to empty her pockets and she came for some reason with basically a mythical rarity load out of pocket loot. 2 Cinnamon booze plastic shots, lip gloss, chapstick and a cart. Now me being the worlds biggest glorified coward who never smoked and almost never drinks was amazed she had all this shit on her. I ask her how much she had to drink tonight and she told me how for every drink she served she also drank (idk why tf weird flex but ok?) we then kinda decide to go out of the tent because all of a sudden she wants to explore the pitch black woods when we both have very little phone battery left for flashlight. I think in my sober mind that’s a horrible idea and I remember in the back of my mind we had to be back in an hour from like 8:30pm and I remind her assuming she will have it into account but fail to realize SHES DRUNK AF AND CANT PROCESS SHIT!!! Anyways we walk around the creek bed and eventually we have a seat and just weirdly enough lay down watch the stars and talk about romantic stuff, she is very kind all of a sudden and we are just laughing wholeheartedly and enjoying ourselves and occasionally she tries to sloppily kiss me and I’m kinda just laying there like : 🙃. But yeah we there doing all that and then she somehow convinced me to do shots of the weird spicy booze she brought and I was very nervous and almost about to fully fold because I had a lot of important things in my life impending in the coming days and I didn’t want to fuck something up being drunk (not knowing myself if I’m a lightweight or heavyweight drinker) We each do one and I’m kinda there lying paralyzed and shivering in my boots not because of the alcohol but because of the nerves I am chilling with a girl on a beauty of a night next to some lovely sounding creek noises and making out. Me being the newbie I am just go along with anything she says or does because I’m not trying to blow what I have going Yk. But yeah time passes we just there on essentially natures lawn hugging and kissing and talking about cute life aspirations and then I have to break the hard news to her, I inform her I won’t be staying around long by any means ( I leave the next day back to da hood for school) and I feel so bad inside! Like this girl even age difference aside whatever was very kind and I didn’t want to ruin what we had going so I try and explain how I would try to visit her and later the next day I am able to check that tickets cost roughly $50 for one ways to the town she lives in and takes 2 hours and a half something if me for love I was able to do im down ig… Now as a recap: She knows I live super duper far away, She and I both understand we don’t want to ruin what we have and we are trying to see how we can keep this going. I hear someone scream her voice and then I’m like Awww shit ur in trouble right? I check my phone and it’s MOTHERFUCKING 11PM!!!! I’m like OH SHIT WE BEEN GONE A WHILE DAMNNN, I pull her up off the ground and try to get her to her aunt who I assumed was looking for her and then we sadly said it last farewell quickly. She kisses me and then she gets yoinked and chewed tf outta by basically her big auntie bartender me feeling horrible and all because I was so immature not checking the time, I walk up to her to take responsibility for the situation and not be a beta male type character she asks me all of a sudden if I’m “ok or hurt” and I say yeah I’m fine and then she walks away and for some reason my good manners and habits kick in as I quietly shout “good night” and she shouts back “yeah good fucking night!” Slams the door with my newfound friend and they both gone. I feel real bad for the situation but hey it already happened, and I then find out from some of my fellow campers that she was threatening essentially to call the state police because people have gotten lost in the woods but in my head I’m like NUH UH I GOT S TIER GOD MEMORY!!! Anyways I do have the girl I was withs number I message her apologizing for not being more responsible and whatnot and then a lot of time happens from there on. I go to bed at 1:30am, wake up the next morning at 6:57am and I’m worried because she hasn’t responded. I paranoid and feeling like a hopeless romantic sit around stressing for hours until BOOM I get off a call checking up with my moms who was out of town get a message from my dear bartender girl! I’m beyond ecstatic and try to see if we can say goodbye because I have to go so soon that same day (today as I’m writing this) we try to compromise and plan but sadly it doesn’t work out for us and we just don’t get a well deserved farewell. I feel truly defeated and depressed about it and people I’m with are speculating how I have barely eaten in all the hours I have been up today. I reply it’s that m stresses but don’t go into detail trying to avoid ancontroversial discussion. This girls name is Sofia and I as I hope a constituted decent person hope I can keep this relationship but there are a few obstacles. 1, she lives 2 hours best case scenario from me. 2, she doesn’t really answer my messages until very late after I send them (for example i message her 12:30 she responds then doesn’t respond until past 5pm same day) and It’s hard to have a relationship with flawed communication I can see. Now for me I have always wanted to find love but never really succeeded in it and I’m truly just grateful for having any experience like this at all and I want to hear feedback from fellow guys and girl as to what I should do to keep this a respectful and responsible relationship you know?
Sincerely and looking forward to feedback, K

I took my exam yesterday (May 18) at home, and I found out today I passed 3AT! I did not believe I was going to pass. I absolutely thought I had failed and was planning on when to take the exam again. Like others, I thought I would share some of what I did and some recommendations especially if you are taking it at home. Of note, I used to work with college students and teach them how to improve their academic skills (not memorizing but mastering material, not freaking out at an exam, etc) so I wrote this with academic coaching in mind.
Things That Helped Me/My advice:

• Not believing all the "just take the test at a testing center" negativity. Taking a test at home (if you like your home) has some big benefits. This isn't to say everyone should do it, but if you want to do it, here is why it helped me:
  • I get it, lots of folks have bad experiences testing at home. A lot of things can go wrong and they aren't in your control all the time. But, I work from home 99% of the time and know my internet is reliable, I dont have interruptions, etc.
  • Theres a HUGE benefit in taking the exam in a place where you are very comfortable. If you have test anxiety, this is something to consider. I didn't have shoes on, I wore comfy clothes, I could control the temperature how I wanted, etc
  • Studying and taking your practice exam in the same environment as the actual exam can be another benefit, as this can help jog your memory! There is some science behind this.
  • You can use ALL of your break time. One of the things I saw in some posts where folks took the test at a testing center is the check in/out procedures ate up a chunk of their break time and sometimes the bathrooms seemed far. So they barely had a break. I actually chose to end my breaks early because I was able to relax and take the entire break as a break.
  • I had zero interaction from anyone at Pearson. No one sent me a chat (I didn't reach out either), I didn't have any issues while taking the exam, etc. This isn't good or bad, but just putting it out there that I felt like I was just taking an exam at my house like it was any other day.
• Learning Stuff!
  • Take practice exams...many, not the same one over and over though. Its ok to repeat them (I did) but dont take 1 practice exam 3 times and think you are ready.
    • As you get closer to the exam, take practice exams simulating the actual exam environment as much as you can - stick to the time limits, take 2 ten minute breaks, dont check your phone, etc
    • Review your correct and incorrect answers - know WHY the correct answer is the correct one. This is what can take the most practice because you have to think like the PMI wants you to think
  • Know the terminology - the SH+ games are great for this, specifically the Crossword but it wont capture all the terminology you need to know.
  • Use all the resources people mention here because one of the best things you can do is use different formats of learning to take in information - especially if it repeats itself!
    • Some folks learn best by writing things out, some learn best by hearing it, etc. Most people learn best by ALL of these things together. You probably didn't realize in K-12 that your teachers were using many modalities to teach you stuff. Think like a K-12 teacher and create a lesson plan with many different activities on the same topics and review it over and over (each review in different modalities that work for you)
    • Example - for one topic - Watch the videos folks suggest, and read through the notes from Third3Rock, make your own flashcards and talk it out
    • Talking it out is an underrated/under utilized learning modality. The purpose of this is acting like you are teaching someone else. Some of you might be able to teach another person like your roommate, partner, or child. But if you dont have a human or a pet to teach PMI topics to, get a plant, a pillow, a ghost, etc. Talk the topic out as if you are explaining it or having a conversation about it with another person. If you can't explain it to someone else, you dont know it enough.
    • I am someone who learns by writing things out. Not typing (although I do learn that way), literally writing. But if you are like this too, make sure to put it IN YOUR OWN WORDS. Dont just copy whats on the screen/paper on a index card.
    • Create your own visuals. Not of everything. Just the stuff YOU know you need to see/read again. There are some great visuals out there already too!
    • A few days before my exam, I re-wrote some of the main concepts I wanted to remember on larger pieces of paper (printer paper) with colorful markers. This included topics/questions I wasn't so confident on, important terminology, etc. I used a lot of paper...and then I taped them to the walls in my hallway. I didn't put them in my office because I knew I'd have to take them down before the exam and I didn't want that stress. So I put them in the hallway and would pause and read them, talk them out, dance while singing the topics, etc. Its like an information radiator for yourself and again, there's science behind how these things can help some people learn.
  • You dont need an expensive "bootcamp" or pricey course to learn this material. With the amount of free or cheap options out there (all the things you see mentioned in this subreddit), you dont necessarily need to shell out a lot of money for anything else. My work paid for an expensive bootcamp. I did it and wasn't impressed. It was like drinking from a firehose and the worse way anyone can learn information - hearing someone talk at you for 8 hours a day for 4 days in a row. I dont recommend this at all. I did not use my notes nor resources from this bootcamp for anything. There could be better bootcamps out there - I've had a few friends have better experiences. But we all used other free/cheap resources to learn in more detail.
    • If you really want a course, some of the courses folks have mentioned here (Udemy, etc) that are self-paced are likely far better to learn initial information just for the fact that you can go back and review the information in a lot of detail/re-watch videos, etc.
• There are differences between the PMI Study Hall practice exams and the actual exam. You're probably think, OBVIOUSLY there are differences! Here are the ones I observed:
  • The actual exam questions were not as wordy/long as the practice exam questions. They often had very little information in them and yet you had to make a decision as if you knew all of the context. But also dont assume anything!
  • Many of the questions had answer choices where 2 were extremely similar to each other and seemed correct
  • I only had 2 matching questions and no math/calculations
  • I felt like I failed the very first section. These questions were HARD right out of the gate. I dont think this section had any easy or moderate questions in it. I literally thought I had failed the whole exam because of this and was planning on when to retake it. Note that while this was my first section, it may not be in that order for other people. All the people saying, "there were no expert questions on my exam" - yeah, not mine! And I did relatively well with expert questions on the practice exam. I am aware that there are experimental questions on the exam which dont count in your score. Maybe these were it, I am not sure. But damn, this section was hard.
• Actual Exam Week/Day Prep
  • If you have been intensely studying for a bit, you need a break before your exam. This is even more true if you work full-time, have a family, etc. Your brain can literally only have so much energy and if you are exhausted going into the exam, you will not be functioning at your best.
    • The week of your exam, only do light review. This means, maybe one practice exam but like the beginning of the week. Or no practice exam. Review the concepts you miss a lot, review terminology. That's it.
    • Eat well for you. Dont push yourself with workouts unless thats your norm. Get good sleep in the days leading up to the exam. Drink a good amount of water not just the day of/day before the exam.
  • Schedule your exam at a time where you know you tend to feel more energized, and more relaxed, if at all possible. For me, even if I am more awake in the morning, I knew having an exam first thing would give me a lot of anxiety the night before and I probably wouldn't sleep then I'd do bad on the exam. I scheduled my exam at 1:15pm on a Saturday. I slept in a little, had some coffee and a leisurely breakfast, reviewed some things, then I was ready.
  • Talk nicely to yourself - with how much all of this can cost, and whatever other pressures you may have, there can be a lot of "I have to pass, like HAVE to pass!" pressure. Of course we all want to pass the first time and be done with it, but thats not to worry about right now. Talk nicely to yourself - make those encouraging sticky notes and put them around your house, or meditate, etc. but make sure to remind yourself how hard you have worked, and how capable you are. Your only focus is to do your best and thats all you can worry about right now.
  • If you are someone who reads out loud as you are reading questions, you need to practice not doing this. Its probably best to practice this before the week of your exam, but if you dont have that time you need to practice the week of your exam for sure.
  • Right before the exam/as the exam starts
    • The program will give you an intro to how it works. Like where is the timer, where are the buttons, how to highlight, etc. Do it. Do all of the silly things you probably already know how to use. As you are doing it, take deep breaths and exhale slowly at least 3 times. If your heart rate is going up, just pause and do some circle breathing (breath in deeply, hold 4 or more counts, breathe out SLOWLY like for 8-10 counts, then breathe in again, do it again). You do not have to rush into this exam. You have plenty of time.
    • Use the whiteboard tool to write stuff down that is just ruminating in your head. It should stay there through the exam. Get it out of your head because the more you try to hold it all in, the more stress that creates. Write triggers for yourself or draw your beautiful drawings you were practicing with. Again, this helps your memory noggin do its thing and can get out some of that anxiety you are feeling.
  • During the exam
    • Dont let hard questions get you down. This is challenging, even for me who generally does well with test taking. Know that not all questions actually count toward your score. If you have a hard question, do your best, mark for review, and move on. Dont let it cloud your confidence. I literally thought I failed the whole exam because of the first section it was so hard. But I ended up passing 3AT!
    • Take the breaks. Dont try to be a hero. Breaks can be a good reset for your brain! Take them, and take the whole time if you need. Drink water. Have a snackie. Do some breathing and stretches.
    • Watch the time. This is important so you aren't rushing at the end, and also why you dont want to waste a lot of time on a few hard questions. Regarding time, I purposefully went fast when I was practicing to make sure I could still answer correctly under duress (and also I didn't have a lot of time for 4 hour exams while practicing). Most of my practice exams I finished in 1.5 hours and I scored in the 70-80% with expert questions. In the actual exam, I took about 3.25 hours.

I hope this helps someone out there. Sorry it was long but glad you made it to the end!

Hurricane Georg.
Our first contact with the new world was a colossal hurricane. Veins of lightning shattered through the black, swirling clouds. I had just tried to calm the nerves of the ship when I saw Suri sitting in the hall beneath the control room.
She was in a lounge corner with her suitcase opened and her supplies scattered across the small table. The little light from the window illuminated her drawing for me to see over her shoulder.
The black and white sketch began at the bow of the ship. The figure of a man in facing the open ocean. Ahead of him, the familiar despair of Hurricane Georg. The man had his back towards the artist, but his stature sailed through the fierce storm without worry. His gaze only in the beautiful sight of home on the other side.
Her pencil began to etch the details of his crewmans jacket, "You have a gift, Suri. Truly, you do."
She was ahead of me, she did not jump or gasp as I had expected, "Thank you, Capi. I saw you in the reflection. Im hard to get the jump on."
"Then this shouldnt surprise you," I smiled and approached her table. "My capi stars are on the right side, "I stepped back and tapped my shoulder."
Disappointment inked her face, darkening her mood, "Dam."
I laughed and pulled up a chair. She had captured the view from the window perfectly and I made a point to tell her. As we talked the storm outside began to fade. The world around us was healed and the worries of yesterday had never existed.
Her eyes were near black, in color, and her skin was incredibly warm. Physical characteristic were useless to determine where a person was from, but 500 years ago, she would have fit at home with the people of the Middle East. Had I been a different man, her beauty and brain would make a perfect partner.
The longer I stared, the darker the world around us became. Until she broke my gaze and looked shocked at something through the window.
"Did you see that?"
"No, what was it?"
"I-Im not sure..." her face drained of color as the harsh rocking of the storm was interrupted by something else. Suri and I were flung off our chairs onto the floor, her supplies pelting us as they flew through the air. I tried to stand, but my legs were too soft to make it easy.
I struggled to a kneel using the bolted-down desk. Suri gasped and I looked down. The longer I looked, the itchier it became. Once more the world grew darker and I only had enough energy for a simple joke.
"Mr. Morgs was right about those things."
"Gud morning, Capi!" Ennay cheered from the wall-mounted screen.
I struggled to sit myself up. I was in the infirmary, only Ennay was there to greet me. My jacket was gone. All I had on was a white t-shirt and grey shorts.
"Officer Angelhart had your attire taken to be cleaned," Ennay chimed in, "Today is Wednesday, sir, 4:13am. Its the morning after you lost consciousness."
I thanked him and asked him to catch me up on the happenings in the passed half day.
"The reality is unclear, Capi, but Helmsman Archer believes we were attacked by a... a sea monster, sir."
"Archer? Hes no storyteller. Why?" I swung my legs over the bed, "get him down here or tell him im on my way."
Ennay surprised me with his fast response, "No. Sir, We had a breach. Ms. Aziz told the Doctor you had severed and artery during a spell of turbulence. The New Horizon had actually made contact with something what breached the hull. Damage Control responded in 4 minutes and were quick to contain flooding. However, we sustained a second breach."
Before he could continue, I dropped back onto the bed, "Whats the status?"
"On the New Horizon? Operational. A few sections had to be permanently sealed until we are out of this storm."
"And Damage Control?"
Ennay did not respond as quickly as he had been. It felt like an eternity before he told me, "6 casualties," the room fell completely silent. I couldnt even hear my heart beating, "5 fatalities. Sergant Franccigo Blanco is recovering in Infirmary 4C. He is unconscious, but has sustained gruesome wounds. Officer Angelhart declared a S.O.E. to assume your position. Otherwise,..."
"Yes, yes, the prosthetics. I hate that system."
"Well, sir, you are able to disable it."
"What?"
"Its not a very common scenario, but since we are not in International Sea, the law requiring your presence does not necessarily need to be enforced."
I sat back and thought for a second, "Ill discuss it with Dr. Mally. Where are they all?"
"Dr. Mally is in Infirmary 4C with Sergant Blanco. Officer Angelhart is your office filling out an incident report for both your accident and the breaches."
"Thank you, Ennay. Tell Max I am on my way and then let Dr. Mally know I will meet her shortly."
"Of course, sir."
My office was silent except for the fan gently spinning from the ceiling. Across from me was a young man, mid-twenties, with dusty blond hair. His uniform was perfect, he has even removed his hat on the perfect beat upon entering the room.
The appearance and demeanor any ship captain would be beyond proud to accept on his ship. It had just been dumb luck that he had lost both of his eyes to shrapnel sealing off the lower corridors during the state of emergency yesterday.
I poured Mr. Blanco a drink, 2444 Geoff Russel - The Hearty Mans Drink. I needed to finish the incident report, but Id never ask a man to relive what he had without a bit of buzz to his bite.
"So, Sargent Blanco, I-"
"You can call me, Fran, Capi."
"And you can call me Santago, for tonight anyway," I continued my questions. I tried my best to stay shallow and not dive deep into the pain Fran had endures just hours ago.
We talked about the 5 fatalities.
"Did you... see... them die?"
The gauze replacing his eyes stared at me, blankly. His face was uncanny, unhuman. Like the man inside may actually have been a 6th dead body.
"No," he quickly took a drink, "I did hear them, though. They yelled and screamed for me to open the door. I- I couldnt see. I thought the sea water had poisoned me somehow. I kept rubbing and rubbing my eyes hoping to get whatever radioactive stuff out of my head..." He took a breath. He was remarkably calm. Agitated, of course. But calm.
He continued, "I looked through the window on the bulkhead and the last thing I saw was Aleks staring back at me. His eyes were... he was calling out for me, I am sure of it. But something got him and he was sucked out."
"I am so sorry, Fran," I tried to write as quietly as possible to not remind him of the formality, "Do you know what got him?"
He finished his glass. As he set it down, he missed the table. The cup did not shatter, but it had jolted Fran from his memory. He lost his composure.
He started yelling at me about a horrific beast he had seen. How Aleks, Private Aleksander Igorsen, had been encased in blood and black sludge. He swung his hands wildly at the table in a rage, but had only managed to knock over a lamp.
Pity does not begin to describe what I felt watching him. Like a bleeding animal continuing to run from the wolves despite not knowing he was already surrounded. In him, I saw death. I saw anger. I saw fear. I saw what he was feeling imaging the creature that killed his men.
I grappled with him, trying to make my location known and always talking to him. I was not some monster from the unknown blackness set on hunting him and he needed to know that. He continued to struggle until I had completely engulfed his whirlwind into a hug. The screams turned to cries and then to whimpers.
After some time, I dismissed him back to his room and instructed Ennay that he was on suicide watch. Sergant Franccigo Blanco had earned a promotion or a permanent dismissal, whichever he wanted, but I needed him to take time to himself before I reminded him where we are.
The storm was intense, but at least it was consistent. By Katzs reckoning, we are approaching the halfway point of this hurricane. We had entered it 51 hours ago and Katz had said we are another 50 away from clear skies.
Unfortunately for all of us, Katzs theory was not seen through.
It began with our solar panelling being severed from their operating power banks. That was not a major issue, hydropower was our primary source. The issue arose when the New Horizon began to spin.
I had radioed the Helmsman demanding why we are weighing anchor, but the anchor was still resting above water. He said no one dropped the anchor. Something else entirely had us. We rushed to every window, every pane of glass to search for whatever it was that was stopping us.
Ennay spoke out, "Capi, Major Gorlammi has spotted our snag at 129 degrees. Nearest viewpoint is Residential Room L3D, assigned to L-"
I ignored the rest, I needed to see what was in that window. Luckily for me, Lucy Partridge was not home. I burst through the door and, for the first time, I saw a behemoth of a serpent-like creature sticking out of the water. I could not see a head, nor tail. I also had no idea if what I saw was the body or an appendage connected to some inconceivably large beast.
After enough time, I manage to figure out one of the ships heavy guns had pierced the creature and was holding us together. Our best bet was to either rotate the gun and hope its dislodged or to remove the gun entirely.
I relayed this information to Ennay to alerted the Gunner Teams and Damage Control. Yet, none of them would be given the chance. In the distance, silhouetted by sparks of lightning the size of the ship, I saw the head of the creature. It must have been miles away, but the size was unparalleled. Its head leaped from the water and swiveled back towards us. It was like a colossal eel. Flashes of light showed through its skin like veins until it sent a surge into the gun and into the ship.
The lights went out across the boat. The only light was the occasional flash from outside. It was completely dark, but I knew it was still coming for us.
I ran out of the quarters as emergency lights slowly burned. The hallway must have been 100 feet long before Id reach the staircase, but when I was halfway through, my feet left the ground.
I felt weightless for a moment. The lights burned out and all around me was darkness. My heart was incredibly slow or maybe time had slowed. I felt the doorframe to Mrs. Partridges room snap against my elbow. There was no pain. I didnt even feel pain when glass cut across my back as I was hurled through the shattered window.
I crashed into the water, it must have been hundreds of feet below me. I was in shock. I looked around and all I saw was darkness. Then, suddenly, all I saw was light. The eel sent a pulse through its body and for the first time I saw the monster entirely. It surrounded the ship above water, coiled all about the waves, and entangled the entire ocean as deep as I could see.
This is not a colossal eel surviving a hurricane.
This colossal eel is the very being causing the hurricane.
A cosmic terror named Hurricane Georg.

Welcome back once more, for our final discussion of Armadale. I apologize again for the discussion being late. Last week, my excuse was that I had to spend time with my sister's family, including a labradoodle. This week, I am dog-sitting my mother's beagle, who has separation anxiety and gas. I am horribly sleep-deprived because this dog insists on sleeping next to my bed every night, snoring loudly and farting. Speaking of people breathing in poison in their sleep, let's get to the recap:
Allan has just set off for the Adriatic, with his cash converted to gold, obviously the result of Manuel's suggestions. Lydia and Ozias have been transferred to Turin by Ozias's employer, and Lydia pretends to have gotten a letter from her mother, asking her to come home, so she has an excuse to go back to London. Once there, she checks the newspaper for any articles or obituaries indicating that Allan has died. She also finds Mother Oldershaw's new address, but decides not to visit her.
After a few days, she finally gets the news she's been hoping for. Allan's yacht sunk off the southern coast of Italy, and everyone on board perished. Her next step is to write to Bashwood:
My dearest Bashwood,
I desire you... I mean, I desire to *meet with you... to apologize for my previous behavior towards you. I have foolishly made the mistake of marrying an immature child. If only I had married a real man (realness not necessarily extending to his teeth and hair)!*
Please, do not show this letter to anyone. Let us meet clandestinely.
Sincerely,
Lydia Armadale (note the last name)
Lydia then considers the marriage certificate, and realizes a glaring flaw in her plan: Ozias's handwriting looks nothing like Allan's. In a panic, she decides that her only option is to get advice from Mother Oldershaw. Unfortunately, Mother Oldershaw appears to have found God, and no longer wants anything to do with Lydia's plans. (Of course, she refuses to give Lydia the signed paper that she was going to use to extort money from Lydia if her plans succeeded.)
While leaving Oldershaw's, Lydia runs into Dr. Downward... excuse me, Dr. Le Doux, totally legitimate sanitarium owner. She realizes that he may be able to advise her, and asks to meet him later at the sanitarium. The sanitarium is basically what you'd expect a 19th-century sanitarium to be: creepy old house with shelves containing jars of preserved "creatures," a "galvanic apparatus" for providing electric shocks, etc. No patients yet, though.
Lydia tells the doctor her story, leaving out the worst details (he doesn't know that she's the reason the yacht sunk, or that her husband goes by the fake name "Ozias Midwinter"). Downward agrees to assist her by claiming to be a witness to the marriage... for a fee of six hundred pounds. Lydia agrees, and he assists her in sending a letter to Thorpe Ambrose, claiming to be Allan's widow.
The next day, Lydia gets a visit from Bashwood, who delivers the news that Neelie is beside herself with grief, and Mr. Darch is handling the matter of the inheritance, which was going to go to Allan's cousin, before Lydia announced her claim.
Bashwood returns a few days later with a shocking letter from Yugoslavia: Allan is alive! This is where I'd normally try to write a funny version of the letter, but nothing I could possibly write would be funnier than the actual letter's opening line: "I have been the victim of a rascally attempt at robbery and murder." Yes, "rascally." Oh, Allan, never change. One of the would-be murderers took pity on Allan and didn't securely board up his cabin, so he was able to escape instead of sinking with the yacht.
Lydia turns to Downward for help.
Downward: What if we trap Allan in the sanitarium?
Lydia: And murder him?
Downward: WTF, no. We get him to agree to not press legal charges against us.
Lydia: And then we murder him?
Downward: I have so many regrets about teaming up with you
Lydia: How do we catch him?
Downward: You could get Bashwood to lurk around the train station and intercept him before anyone else sees him. Have him tell Allan that Miss Milroy was sent here because she was driven insane by her grief for him.
Lydia: Can we murder Allan and Miss Milroy?
Downward: I am running an unlicensed sanitarium under a false name, and even I think you're unhinged.
Lydia: Gwilty as charged
Downward: But wait, what if he doesn't agree immediately, and we have to keep him here for months? What if I have actual patients at the time, and they report us?
Lydia: What if...
Downward: ...please don't say "murder"
Lydia: ...what if he had an accident?
Downward: Oh. Well, if it was an "accident," that would be okay. I don't know how an accident could happen, though, if you aren't an inmate here.
Lydia: I'll think about it
Meanwhile, Bashwood keeps vigil at the train station, until one day he sees... Ozias, who is searching for Lydia because she's stopped writing to him. While they talk to each other, Bashwood can't contain his shock at hearing that Lydia is Ozias's wife, and accidentally calls her "Mrs. Armadale," which understandably makes Ozias suspicious, so he follows Bashwood to see where he goes, which of course leads him straight to Lydia. Lydia pretends she was never married to Ozias, and Ozias faints from the shock.
Lydia heads straight to the sanitarium, tells Downward she's going to be an inmate, and asks for a sleeping draught. Downward prepares the draught, but first places yellow liquid in a purple flask. He then informs Lydia of what he thinks they should say at the inquest after Allan dies: The two of them knew he hadn't drowned, but when he arrived in England, they decided to trap him in the sanitarium because, shortly after his marriage to Lydia, Allan had starting having a delusion that he was engaged to Neelie. Once in the sanitarium, Downward diagnosed Allan with an incurable and fatal brain ailment, and that's what killed him.
Downward has scheduled a "Visitors' Day" so that people will witness Lydia as an inmate in the asylum. The visitors are mostly women, because life as a woman in Victorian England was so boring, they had nothing better to do than go to sanitariums to gawk at the mentally ill people and see where they will eventually live when the hysteria finally drives them mad. (I am only barely paraphrasing. The actual quote is "In the miserable monotony of the lives led by a large section of the middle classes of England, anything is welcome to the women which offers them any sort of harmless refuge from the established tyranny of the principle that all human happiness begins and ends at home.")
Downward shows them around the sanitarium and explains how it will be run, including only allowing novels that make people feel comfortable. (I assumed this was an intentional satire of Wilkie's critics, and the notes in the Oxford World's Classics edition confirmed this.)
But then Downward gave a sales pitch that damn near sold me on his sanitarium. "I throw up impregnable moral intrenchments between Worry and You. ... Will ten minutes’ irritation from a barking dog or a screeching child undo every atom of good done to a nervous sufferer by a month’s medical treatment? There isn’t a competent doctor in England who will venture to deny it!" Considering I almost couldn't post last week's discussion because of a few hours' exposure to two loud children and a labradoodle, I'm about ready to self-diagnose with hysteria and deranged lunacy.
He also explains that while the bedrooms lack fireplaces, they're heated with hot water. This impressed me because I've read about Victorian insane asylums not having fireplaces in the bedrooms (since the inmates might burn themselves), but I always assumed this meant that the inmates were cold in the winter. But wait... the bedroom also has secret controls that let him open, close, and lock the window and door from the outside, and a vent that lets him pump gas into the room. Whaaat? I rescind my diagnosis of hysteria and deranged lunacy. I want nothing to do with this.
After the tour is finished, Downward demonstrates to Lydia how to prepare the poison, and then breaks the bottle so that his assistant (who doesn't know about the purple flask) will think there's no more of that chemical in the house.
Meanwhile, Ozias is stalking Bashwood at the train station. He thinks Lydia is cheating on him, and Bashwood is waiting for Lydia's lover. But then he sees Bashwood with Allan. After confronting the two of them, he learns Bashwood's story about having to take Allan to Neelie in the sanitarium. Realizing that Lydia is probably still behind Bashwood's actions, Ozias insists on going with the two of them. On arriving at the sanitarium, Allan is informed that Neelie cannot see him until the morning, but he and Ozias are welcome to spend the night: Allan in Room Four, and Ozias in Room Three.
Lydia sets Bashwood up to spy on Allan's door from a room with a grate in its door. She tells him to make sure Allan stays in his room all night. Later, watching from the grate, Bashwood observes Ozias leave his room and examine the fumigating apparatus connected to Allan's room. Then Ozias stuffs his handkerchief in the grate, blocking Bashwood's view, before going into Allan's room and convincing Allan to switch rooms with him.
Later that night, Lydia returns and asks Bashwood if anything happened. Too afraid to tell her about the handkerchief, he tells her nothing happened, and she dismisses him to bed. After almost convincing herself to not go through with it, she then starts the process of pouring the poison at five minute intervals. While waiting for one of the intervals to pass, she notices Ozias's handkerchief and realizes that Bashwood lied to her. She checks in Room Three, and finds Allan asleep where Ozias should be.
In a panic, Lydia rushes into Room Four and drags the unconscious Ozias out. She then continues to pour the poison, writes a last letter to Ozias, and locks herself in the room.
We end with an epilogue that rapidly ties up all the random loose ends. Lydia has been buried in a nearly unmarked grave. The doctor is apparently still running his sanitarium. Allan and Neelie will be married in the spring. Mrs. Milroy doesn't have much longer to live, but she's undergone a personality change for some reason and she and the Major are happy for once. Ozias is recovering and living with Allan. Mother Oldershaw is a religious speaker, apparently. Bashwood has gone insane. Manuel drowned.
But wait, one last thing: Wilkie has something to say to us. He wants us to know that he intended the dream to be left up to interpretation. Thanks for handing me a discussion question like that, Wilkie. He also shares a weird-ass story about how, after he'd finished the rough draft and while the story was in the middle of serialization, several people were poisoned in their sleep on a boat called The Armadale. Okay, Wilkie. Thank you for that incredibly weird anecdote.

[ First / Previous ]
Memory Transcription Subject: Hileen, Krakotl Fugitive Recovery Agent
Date [standardized human time]: November 28th, 2136
It'd been a while since I sat in Marlig's office for a talk face-to-face. Given the agency's secluded location at the edge of the downtown region, it was a chore to drop by when it wasn't for business, but I'd deemed the matter at hand to be worth my time.
I passed by Nampi at her desk on my way to the door and she gave me a coy glare as I carried on. Trying to ignore her risible ear waggle, I turned the corner to the door with my boss’s name painted on the glass panel where I could hear the frantic crumpling of paper.
Quietly, I entered Marlig's office without prompt as I knew he hated to be spooked by knocking. My mentor was surprisingly spry for a bird at his age, sorting through papers with one wing and an eye while using his talons with the other to set away the papers he had splayed out.
“Hileen!” he chirped. “Glad you could make it in today. I was just finishing up my paperwork. Take a seat.”
It was always nice to hear him drop the professional motif for a more grandfatherly attitude when speaking in person. I did as he suggested and took a seat while he grumbled to himself over the sorting. My eye caught a few of the old contracts he was rifling through and saw that some dated back to his days as an agent.
Eventually, he left some sitting out as he sequestered the rest back into their files, sorted by a dichotomy that only he and Nampi could comprehend fully. He motioned with a wing for me to peruse and I turned the first one to face me to find it was my first contract, signed by me in a sloppy fashion. “This takes me back a couple of years.”
“Slick bastard thought he could get away on a forklift but you showed him! Certainly more exciting than my first day!”
“Mm-hmm. And it was when I nearly got impaled that you had the idea to commission all of us utility vests.”
He chuckled, “I really should’ve done so sooner. Cuts and scratches were already a risk, but a forklift was a new one!”
I flipped through the pages of each report, finding that Marlig's notes were filled with praises of my work. There were highs and lows, but I was flattered to find that the grizzled krakotl held my performance in such high regard.
“Flawless interception!” read one footnote about me catching a runner. “Couldn't have done it better myself!”
Marlig waited patiently as I browsed quickly through each page, realizing more and more how the notes also marked improvements in my work. How I found it easier to talk down a rowdy client, or apprehend them in the case that they were beyond helping on my part. Flowery language plastered most pages with him fawning over my work as a doting father would to his prodigal child.
The trend took a sharp turn as the notes became fewer and more critical the closer the dates reached to the present. I brushed the others aside with a wing to peruse the final paper. “And this…”
“Is Tac. Your latest contract. The most recent in a line of declining performance since the interview. This has become a pattern, Hileen, and its consequences are beginning to reach beyond yourself. Paji and Vesek resigned recently for personal reasons, which leaves us even less hands on deck than before. That's four people to cover the entire municipal region, and maybe even beyond, should needs arise. Three, if we include this little probation I have you on.”
“What was I supposed to do? Marlig, these ‘jobs’ you've got us working on overstep the contracts we were signed on with. Our job is to make sure people obey their court-mandated duties, not drag them off to the facilities ourselves!”
“... So the trip we took to the facilities did bother you.”
A sigh clicked in my throat as he reminded me. “Is that what happens to the people we take in, Marlig? Is that what would've happened to your wife?”
His feathers ruffled.
“That's what happens to those who are too dangerous to the general public to be left roaming free. Not everyone we deal with winds up there, but everyone can be subject to it. Miskela sued for her exoneration and proved in court that she was not diseased. I brought you there to show you how it helps the people, but I see now that it was a mistake. I understand why you were so perturbed, really, but it's how things have been for centuries. It's how we've protected ourselves from the dangers out there.”
“You were willing to let Barsul be interned there, too.”
Marlig flinched and sighed as he swept the papers towards himself once I'd signaled I was done. He turned one eye to me while he sorted them.
“There's no room for favoritism, girl. I negotiated for him to be allowed to walk free, and look where that got me. That boy - your neighbor - suffered the consequences of my nepotism. So too would the girl, had nobody intervened.”
“Like Richard.”
“The human, yes. Or you. Or the police. Where does this sudden obsession with humans come from, anyway? I get notifications of you talking about the acceptance of them all the time on forums.”
“Does it even need explaining?”
“Well, I guess not, no, but it's certainly an about-face from the way you used to talk about them with me beforehand.”
“People can change, for better or worse. Which one I fall under remains to be seen.”
Marlig stroked at the plumage on his neck as he finished his sorting. “I hope it's the former, for your sake. Was there any reason you came to talk, or were you just checking that I hadn't gone senile?”
“Well, I was hoping to borrow your secretary for the evening.”
He perked up while his eyes narrowed and he laced his fingers together with curiosity. “You… want to spend an evening with Nampi?”
“It's not what you're insinuating, but yes.”
“I was insinuating nothing,” he warbled coyly. “Go ahead and take her, and make sure to split the bill at dinner.”
“Pain-in-the-ass geezer. I'll keep in touch if your friend causes any more trouble.”
“Keep in touch regardless. Miskela and I get lonely in our old age,” he called back. “Take care.”
I stepped out into the hallway and turned toward the desk where I could hear the secretary's claws tapping furtively at her keyboard. Nampi sat silently with her ears and tail in a relaxed position that implied a bored demeanor. There was barely any response as I stood before her, waiting politely for her acknowledgment that never came.
Hesitantly, I cleared my throat.
An ear raised in acknowledgement, but her focus remained on the screen of her computer. “Mhm?”
“Do you…?”
Her ear rotated toward me, though she still maintained a passive attitude as she continued to glare mindlessly at the monitor.
“Are you free this evening?”
“Well, I'm quite booked, I believe. Why do you ask?”
I was surprised at her curt, dry tone. She hadn't spoken with me like this since we first got to know one another.
“Well,” I started. “I realized something. Every time we went out, whether it was clubbing, or dinner, or even walking around the parks, you always footed the bill. And so…”
Slowly, her other ear perked up and I saw her keystrokes slow down as she listened in.
“I wanted to return the favor?”
Her lips smacked as she opened her mouth, though paused before she spoke. “How could you possibly do that?”
“With a little gesture of friendship.”
Nampi's horizontal pupil turned up toward me and her tail twitched.
I continued, “So that belt you're wearing? It's the same belt you've worn since we first met. And I know you're the pragmatic type who'd never spend a credit more than she needs to, except for all the times you do"- her ears twitched in indignance -"I wanted to see about getting you a little something… extra?”
Her paws raised from the keyboard and she leaned in, resting her snout on her palms. “Go on.”
The bubbly venlil's tail sold out her collected facade as it twitched with anticipation. She was cornered and she didn't even know it yet.
“Well, I found just the place on the other side of town where we can start. It's a place almost as rich and indulgent as yourself.”
“The Platinum Paw? I mean3”
Her ears folded back in embarrassment as she cracked. She wasn't cut out for acting anyway.
“So that's what it's called! Jeez, I couldn't for the life of me figure out what it was called. Now what do you say? We go over there and find you something nice—”
I hadn’t even finished my thought before Nampi had grabbed her bag and was out the door, giving me a playful tail flick that said come and get me.

The place I suggested was in a shopping center on the opposite side of town, though easily accessible because of its proximity to the transport rails. Nampi had insisted on grabbing something to eat beforehand and so now gleefully bit into a bundle of stalks that had been “grilled” as explained from the food truck we'd stopped at.
Her tail flicked back and forth with her usual enthusiasm as we entered the massive complex of stores. The roofless plan allowed the natural, orange sun to flood the upper levels while artificial lighting illuminated the ground level wherever the light couldn't reach.
The place was built in the last decade by the previous City Magister in a bid for popularity, though ultimately for naught as he would lose the vote following a scandal involving an iftali priestess and a carved bar of soap. I had to say that despite being sick in the head, he sure had a great sense of decor.
Nampi snacked away, joining me in admiring the scenery as we continued to the place I’d planned out for us. Aimless chatter all melded together into a single, thrumming murmur as pedestrians navigated the many levels and stores offered in the place.
A troupe of children passed by us, held in a chain of tails and arms as they were escorted by a pair of venlil who I assumed were students and teachers on a school trip. I caught a whiff of a sweet, aromatic breeze and found it to come from a perfume shop on the same level as us; naturally, venlil were not to be found inside.
We passed a fountain where a couple sat on the edge, their tails twined together as they giggled and flirted. I turned and caught Nampi watching them as well, though she awkwardly returned to sucking the remains of her meal from her claws when we made eye contact. Her ears lifted when I raised a wing to signal to the store we were going to stop at first.
“Platinum Paw, The Greatest Fashion Emporium For Everyone!”
The title alone was painfully cliche, taken to the tenth power by the brightly lit store taking up three department slots. Despite the flashy exterior, though, it was the best place to shop for belts, brooches, and bracelets alike. Customers who looked like they earned my yearly salary in a week browsed the higher end brands while I brought my friend to the section I wanted to show her.
Her ears were held up as we stood together next to a shelf chock full of fashionable bags and bandoliers of every variety.
“Pick one,” I told her.
Nampi's ears shot to a straight pose in surprise, “Any?”
“Within reason. I've got a few extra credits to blow and I know nobody better to spend it on.”
With an inviting headtilt, I let Nampi peruse the shelves at her leisure. Her lips pursed together and her tail flicked with glee as she fingered at every piece that caught her eye. I chuckled at her outburst of enthusiasm while turning to find my own items to gloss over.
A breeze from outside nipped at my beak while I considered what I’d like to purchase. The place dripped with an atmosphere of faux hospitality, from the bright blue-stained floorboards to the radio prattling off advertisements in a sickeningly sweet tone to the faint, fruity aroma of scented cleaner. It was oppressive as only a fissan-owned company could be to the senses.
What I wouldn’t pay to see how a human would fare in such an environment.
I knew they were social creatures at least, but I had no doubt that the predatory senses of a human, so honed to hunting, would get overstimulated in this center of gaudy indulgence. Knowing I was something of a predator myself made me sympathize provided that even I had to squint to keep the pale lights inside from searing my eyes. I could only imagine how the arboreal eyes of a Terran would fare. I was so lost in thought imagining how lost the Terrans would be that I could almost ignore the obnoxious giggling and metallic rattling coming from behind me.
Risking a peek at the source, into my sight came a pair of venlil, one a male carrying a pair of bags as well as a couple more strapped to his belt. The bored expression in his eyes was not one of a man who was in high spirits. The other venlil was a woman who was the source of the noise.
Her mottled gray pelt was accented by a tasteful belt design, free of almost any practical functions but not flashy or excessive in garnishment either. At least, that’s what I would say, were it not for the braid of beads that dangled on the belt, jingling with each bounce of the lively woman’s stride. It was clear that such a gaudy accessory was intended to draw attention to her, though why was a mystery. Certainly, the shiny braids seemed designed as decoration first and practical second.
She turned about and I faced back to my browsing before she could catch me staring. Nampi was nowhere in sight, though I figured she was somewhere behind the shelf, sifting through every accessory on the section I'd suggested.
Clink.
Something pelted to my immediate right. I tilted my head to spot a tree nut shell clattering to the floor. Without being able to guess where it came from, I had to wonder what could've launched it over this way. Even with my keen eyesight, nobody in the crowd seemed to be a suspect.
Clink.
Another shell pelted my vicinity, ricocheting off of the floor and hitting the shelf I was standing next to. I ruffled my feathers in frustration - clearly, someone was trying to get my attention, though I couldn't make out who it was. Out of the corner of my vision, the woman from before eyed me curiously as I looked about, though I wasn't interested in engaging with her.
Thwack.
One more shell came flying and, unfortunately, the aim on this one was true, nailing me on the beak. Irritated, I stormed out of the store to find the source of the instigator. I scanned over the bodies to find anyone who could've been responsible for this indignity, eventually concluding that it came from the dining area across the walkway.
Whoever was responsible was in for an earful and I was already structuring which of the offender's family members would be acceptable as fodder for stray words. As I approached, I found the tables were mostly empty save for one, which made my heart begin to drop as I met eyes with the only occupant. Suddenly, I was much less inclined to hurl insults.
“Oh, hi there!” Qitel called out in a sickly sweet tone. “Come, take a seat! We have much to discuss!”
The Exterminator clutched a bag of tree nuts in his claws, a pile of discarded shells already gathered on the table next to him. He grabbed another as I approached, effortlessly prying the shell in half between two claws and tossed the contents into his mouth. “Good protein, these,” he commented as I sat down.
“Must be for that good arm you've got there,” I mumbled. I caught sight of a couple of bags beneath his chair, seemingly from one of the tech stores contained within the center.
“Bah, it's guesswork. So how are you? I haven't heard from you since we worked together!”
“I was just spending time with a friend, shopping and enjoying my time off.”
“Your time off? Oh, am I interrupting something?”
His snide tone irked me, though now wasn’t the time for interjections. “You are, Qitel,” I replied with no shortage of vitriol in my tone. “But I see no harm in chatting for a bit.”
“Good, because I have some merchandise”- he reached into his belt pocket and deposited a couple of items onto the table -“and you’re just the person to look into it, human sympathizer.”
I drew a terse breath in shock, but my worries were quelled when I considered that if Qitel had the power to do anything about it, he would’ve done so instead of approaching me so discreetly. A glance down at the item on the table showed that he was presenting what looked to be a tracker as well as a personal drive. “Found in the garbage,” he told me.
“The guild resorts to dumpster diving when they already have such a bloated budget now?”
“No, featherbrain, I have decided to keep this for myself. These items were found together, sealed in a plastic pouch, and placed in a garbage bin. The city has bans against electronics being placed into public bins, and so I was curious why this wound up in there. Managed to get my coworker, a techie, to crack it open and…”
Qitel reached into his belt again, glowering at me with the same condescending gaze he’d given me when I first saw his face. He seemed to revel in digging for the item as slowly as possible to waste my time. Finally, he found whatever he was looking for and revealed it as a printed piece of paper, folded into eighths. The snobby yotul threw the unfurled paper on the table and rolled it toward me.
I craned my neck to look at the parchment, though I was immediately perplexed by the text on it; it appeared to be some sort of form, going by the boxes with words on the inside, followed by blank lines. “Found on the drive, here,” Qitel told me, jabbing a claw to the storage. “Translator shows it as Terran writing.”
Drawing my holopad from my satchel, I held it over the paper with the translator to get an understanding. Surely enough, the language on it came up positive as a variant of Terran writing and I was affirmed in it being a form of some sort based on the wording of the text. The boxes seemed like an odd sort of job application, asking for the typical name, contacts, and prior work experiences, but quickly took a strange turn as it began asking for where their home on Earth was prior to arrival, what family they had on Venlil Prime if any, and where they worked, implying that they were seeking individuals who were already employed.
I knew little about human employment methods, but I didn’t imagine that sourcing individuals from other jobs was the most efficient way to gain a workforce. Terran service industries already dotted the planet while many humans also found work in local environments. So what was the angle that the creator of this application was going for?
Most concerningly was that the paper had no insignia, identifying marks, or noted address to return the form to. “And where did you find it again?”
“In the garbage, alongside this intact tracker that was activated at the time of recovery. Y’know, when I was dumpster diving. Text on the document showed it was addressed to one ‘Choctaw Nexus’.”
“A pseudonym of some sort?”
“Clearly. Short sorting through the archives shows the first name traces back to the group out east - perhaps you've heard about them. How the name and the items we have here are connected is beyond my understanding, but-”
“Well, this has been an absolutely riveting discussion about your collection of trash, Qitel,” I told him as I stood up to leave. “But this really sounds like an issue to be resolved by your fellow guildsmen.”
The sound of another shell splitting rang out as I turned away.
“I'm not through talking with you, predator.”
The sting as a piece nailed me in the back of the head prompted me to whirl back around, sticking my beak in the insolent yotul's snout. “Perhaps you've forgotten, little man,” I cooed in an equally bittersweet tone to the one he gave me before. “The krakotl never had a problem with settling issues the old-fashioned way before the interview. Try me and find out why I'm in the line of work I am.”
“Oh, we wouldn't want that in such a"- he waved his paw to a group of passersby who had stopped to gawk at my display -”public forum. Please, contain yourself.”
I had to force the feathers on my back to settle and I raised my head away from him. “What else is it you wanted, then?”
“Well, I'd appreciate if you took this merchandise off my paws,” he told me as he brushed the electronics and printout toward me.
“Why would I do that?”
“Because you're closer to the humans than I'd ever care to be, and may be able to find out who this Choctaw Nexus is. Something about the package just feels… off. And I know when to trust my feelings. Besides, we both know that you know where Tac is, don't we?”
“I don't-”
“We have videographic evidence that you conspired with a human - of the aforementioned squatters, no less - and let the kid escape. You're not as sneaky as you think, and if we find this ‘Choctaw Nexus’ turns out to be a bad actor that can be traced back to them - and by extension, you - well, there’d be no talking down my boss from having you dealt with. By helping me find out who this is, you may yet be able to clear your name of any wrongdoing.”
I clenched my beak tightly to maintain a straight face. Qitel stood up with a flourish and discarded the bag he was carrying in a bin.
“See, the krakotl were never special for using threats and bullying to get results. It's because you were good at killing predators,” he jeered. “Now, if you don't mind, this primitive has appointments to attend to… old lady who got trampled courtesy of the humans and all. You stay out of trouble, Hileen, and stay in touch.”
The self-assured marsupial melded into the crowd in a matter of seconds, leaving me with a table containing dumpster trophies and a pile of shells. Reluctantly, I swept the shells into my wing and dumped them into the bin before gathering the other two items he'd left me and stuffing them into my bag. I'd been gone from Nampi long enough and she would notice my absence before long.
Crossing the walkway again, I could spot from where I stood that Nampi was indeed still in the Platinum Paw. I approached, and soon I found that while she didn't seem to have noticed me stepping away, she was definitely in a soured mood based on the sagging of her ears and tail. With my talons clacking on the floorboards, I hustled to her side and her mood chippered up ever so slightly as she heard me approach.
I chimed in, “Find anything?”
“Everything. I want everything, Red, and I can't decide on what I want. They all just look so great!”
From behind, a voice called out, “Nampi!”
We both jumped at the exclamation and turned about to spot the venlil lady I'd seen before spring from behind the shelf. The man poked his head from behind the shelf too, though less enthusiastically and with yet another bag in his clutches. My friend's eyes widened in surprise with her tail and ears perking up in kind. With a light in her eyes, she exclaimed, “Nalek!”
The two embraced with shrill squeals and laughter as Nalek's accompaniment and I traded awkward glances.
“It's been too long!”
“You never stayed in contact!”
The women exchanged giddy greetings and the pompous stranger turned to me, leering over me as though she was sizing me up.
“Who's your friend here?”
“Oh she's actually my-...”
Nampi paused for a moment, looking back to me.
“Yeah, she's a friend.”
“A friend,” Nalek repeated while her eyes flicked between Nampi and I. “Right.”
Somehow, I get the impression that that was judgemental.
“I'm Hileen, by the way,” I chirped, “if names are to be exchanged.”
“Hileen, that's a lovely name! And such plumage to match, it's a wonder you aren't swarmed by suitors!”
Internally, I groaned at the notion. The idea of being approached by someone to state their interest in me made me queasy, to say the least. Thankfully, I never had that issue growing up as most of the other drakes in school were too busy chasing girls who didn't have a lousy pigmentation mutation such as myself.
“I'm flattered,” I told Nalek before turning to the man whose name had yet to be introduced. “May we get your name?”
“Sask.”
His response was succinct and tonally flat, though there was a brief silence as I expected him to elaborate. Nalek's beads jingled as she lashed him on the calf with her tail.
“I'm Sask, Nalek's fiancée,” he added, throwing her a look to see if she was satisfied.
Nampi gasped with her paws over her snout. “Fiancée! Nalek, you're getting married and you never even told me!”
“Well, I felt a little guilty since it technically broke our pact we made when we were pups. You remember that?”
“Of course! Why wouldn’t I? ‘Let she who bonds through betrothal first be cast out unto the world for all to admonish her!’”
Sask and I both gave inquisitive expressions. “You two spoke like that as pups?” Sask asked.
“Well, I'm paraphrasing,” Nampi admitted with a playful ear waggle. “But you get the gist.”
“Indeed, they do, sweet Nampi. Now, may I ask what you're doing bringing your avian friend here into this store on this fine claw?”
“Oh, no no, she's the one treating me! Isn't that right, Red?”
I saw her tail twitch and was sure it took restraint not to tickle my neck with it as we stood before her old friend.
“She's been a good friend,” I explained. “So I wanted to reverse the roles for once and treat her to something myself.”
Nampi skipped over to me and wrapped her arm around me, glancing back to her old friend. “See? We'd all be so lucky to have a… friend like her.”
“So I've witnessed. But perhaps you're a bit stuck, as I've seen you prancing up and down these aisles for a while, no? Maybe you don't know what you want?”
“Nalek, you know I've never been good about making my mind up.”
“Some things never change, you ditz. Tell you what: you and Sask go find us a seat and we can catch up all we'd like when we're not taking up aisle space, yes? So shoo! I'll help Hileen here pick one out for you!”
With a bored grunt, Sask made off with the goods he had strapped to himself, followed by Nampi who gave me one more playful tail flick before dashing off into the crowd. I looked back to the mottled snout of Nalek who watched her friend wander off with a wistful glance.
“She was my first, you know.”
“Your what now.”
“Love. Way back when we were growing from pups into young adults back in private education, we explored much together. We saw each other through a lot, including the less savory parts of finding a mate. When Nampi realized it wasn't the boys she was into, she turned to me, and I offered my hand as her stalwart companion… to a point.”
“You weren't interested in her the same way?”
“I'd grown up seeing her as a sister of sorts, so ultimately, when we split it off, we stayed close as friends and she never seemed to be bothered by it. She struggled to find others in school who had the same interests as herself, but she never fussed about it.”
Nalek's claws browsed over a set of pouched bandoliers made with intricate embroidering. “Have you two… spent the night together? Alone?”
Spiritually, I reeled from the inquiry. The whiplash from that question was equitable to being smacked by a human. “Wha- why? How's that pertinent to the subject at hand?”
“That sounds like a ‘yes’ to me,” she purred with a smug glance my way.
I didn't need to begin to list the different ways such a question was violating to our privacy, and yet this woman was treating it like a game.
“Not really your concern, ma'am.”
Nalek chuckled as she picked out one of the bandoliers and inspected it with her claws. “I'd like to think that she and I still have that old connection, despite everything. And to that end, I know that she's no slag and doesn't trust easy. To see her be so vulnerable around you and to talk so highly of someone who's clearly below her income level as a predator…”
She stretched the bandolier out to appreciate the design in its entirety.
“Well, that's something special. Here"- she foisted the accessory into my wings as I stood gobsmacked -"this just screams her name.”
“This is, like, double my budget.”
“Love don't come cheap, darling. You wanna see good things happen, sometimes you've gotta step out of your comfort zone and grasp for it!”
“I'm being lectured by a rich woman on finances.”
“It's a philosophy that goes beyond money, ‘Red.’ The humans have a saying, in their horrendously predatory nomenclature, that contains a kernel of truth: ‘you miss every shot you don't take’.”
Yep, that's definitely a human phrase.
Nalek's steely braid rattled with every flick of the tail as we proceeded through the checkout.
“You want things to change between you and her?” she continued. “Don't just wait for it to happen.”
She let the conversation rest there as we finished the purchase, possibly to let me recuperate mentally from the damage done to my account. Outside, we found our respective partners sitting at a table with Sask looking up in boredom as Nampi chatted away, though she immediately shut up and turned to me with excited flicks of her tail as she saw what I was carrying.
I held it toward her and she happily shot to her feet, effortlessly removing the tags with her claws and clipping it to her belt. Nalek clapped and waggled her tail as the giddy lady did a whirl about to let us admire the accessory. While I'd have preferred one with pockets to give it a more practical use, I decided to let Nalek have the victory as our mutual friend clearly enjoyed it.
The rest of the paw was a blur as the two friends chatted without end until Sask eventually reminded his betrothed that they had a schedule to attend to. Though Nalek offered to call us a taxi home as a gesture of kindness, I saw through her ruse to determine that she was trying to pull a fast one on me - the clever ear flick she gave as we boarded the automated vehicle sold it for me.
We sat in the seats as the vehicle took the express ride home.
Nampi cleared her throat before she spoke, “Thank you for taking some time to spend with me, I know you've had a lot less free time as of late.”
“It's a prison of my own design, if I must be honest. A feedback loop of working a job that doesn't guarantee a paycheck to pay for rent that keeps going up, and thus needing to work more.”
The venlil giggled and chided me, “You really should've stayed in university.”
“There's a lotta 'should haves’ that've led me to this point. No use wondering what could have been.”
“There's always a use for wondering what could have been, Hileen.”
She wrapped an arm around my shoulder.
“Every decision I make, I always wonder what I could've done differently that it'd have turned out better,” she explained as she waved her free paw to the sky. “It's how you grow as a person, Red.”
Her silky pelt felt heavenly in contrast to the chilly air from outside, making it hard to let her words sink in.
“You rich types seem chock full of philosophy. I wonder if I'll become a brooding orator when I get some cash to my name.”
The cab filled with laughter as we veered around the final corner to my neighborhood, as it was the closest stop. The door popped open accompanied by a chime from the drone, signaling for me to depart.
But before my talons could even hit the pavement, I felt Nampi's scrawny arms wrap around my waist and she let out a pitiful mewl again.
“You don't need to get off here,” she told me with a pouty expression. “We can spend the rest of the paw at my place.”
“I'd love it, but I need to water my plants and get the month's bills sorted before they're due. Again.”
One claw at a time, I plucked her paws from around my waist and the childish venlil conceded, giving me another ear waggle as I departed. “I'll see you tomorrow?” I asked her.
“If you still have eyes by then, then you can bet your ass!”
“I still don't gamble.”
“You'll come around to it eventually.”
I shut the door to the taxi and watched as it carted away the one venlil who I ever truly felt on the same wavelength as. Fiddling with the lock felt like more of a chore than usual at this time as I felt a little voice tugging at the back of my head.
“You miss every shot you don't take.”
The lock felt jammed as I began to jiggle it more vigorously with the electric key. Either the RFID or NFC readers were messed up, as the lock refused to accept my key. I looked up and down the street, though Nampi was now long gone for me to rescind my earlier rejection.
“Every decision I make, I wonder what I could've done differently.”
The door rattled as I grew more and more infuriated with the lock. Qitel's smug expression as he threatened me so boldly in public played back in my head, and I wondered what would've happened had I decided to go through with insulting his mother. Better yet, I wondered what could've been had I not backed down in the face of his unflinching confidence.
Bzzt. The lock rejected my key again.
“Raagh! You fucking useless hunk of junk!”
I squawked in anger and kicked against the door, careless of the consequences of having Markol back down here to admonish another of his tenants for causing a ruckus. The walls were surprisingly sturdy for how ineffective the venlil architecture looked on the surface and I reeled back in pain as my leg throbbed.
Click.
I looked to my left to see that it wasn't my door that came open, but that of the twins. The door cracked open ever so slightly, no doubt nudged by the force of my tirade and I sighed. Nobody was expected to be home at this time, with Vili being away and Luka leaving early to get a head start.
Luka had been given a stern talking-to by the landlord for allowing one of those cats into his apartment through neglect, and I was disappointed that he seemed to have not learned his lesson this time. In fact, it seemed he hadn't even thought to lock the door this time.
I took it upon myself to shut the door for him before turning back to my own apartment door. Grasping the key with one talon, I turned it ever so gently, though the lock still refused to give in.
With a bit more force, the torsion applied to the key felt as though it should've snapped it by now. Markol sure didn't waste any expense for the security for this place, doubtlessly as a result of his history in electronic security, but I wished now that he had provided a way in that didn't rely on privately sourced locks.
Considering my options as I stood trapped outside, I realized that I had never gotten around to paying for a new lock for Tadi. I'd considered contacting her to inform her that Tac had made it out of town safely, but that'd involve also telling her that her son was now in the care of humans, as if that was a better outcome to her.
Stepping out front, I realized that there was one more option I hadn't considered: my window. I usually forgot to lock it after I was through letting air circulate and I was silently grateful to myself for this absentmindedness now more than ever. Sticking a foot on the threshold, I lifted myself in a way that'd allow me to have leverage to force the window open.
The window made me fight for every inch, but I felt a strange satisfaction as it slowly opened up into an entrance that I could squeeze my way through. I let out a sigh as my talons clicked against the cool floor and slid the window shut.
I laid my satchel on the couch and turned back to the door, ready to unleash my fury on the disobedient object. But as I reached for the lock to manually open the door, I noted that the lights on the RFID interface both flashed at once, blinking erratically. Red and green flickered without rhyme or reason, indicating that it was both active and inactive.
As pretty as the colors were, I now knew that Markol's locks were not as reliable as he had touted them about: typically, such would not occur unless the device was damaged deliberately, and yet nothing indicated that I'd had uninvited guests. One could pray that those cats didn't secretly know how to cobble together an ECM jammer, but my personal wager was on faulty equipment.
Settling in, I browsed my favorite soaps on the television. For what was intended to be a day of relaxation and show of affection for a friend, I found myself rather wound up over all the things that added up. Couples threw around flowery words and swooned over one another on screen as I felt the tension diffuse. My holopad rang and I turned it over to spot that Nampi was informing me that she'd arrived home safely.
>>> Feels empty here, all alone.
She made sure to drive the point home with a sticker of a venlil making a pouty expression.
Next time, I thought to myself, I'll get it right for you, Nampi.
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This post is very long. This first section, before the first triple-line-break, is the summary. Details follow that.
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SUMMARY
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So, I was very much looking forward to Legendary Tales for a while now after hearing so many great things.
I bought it on sale a couple days ago and played the first hour or so, completing the tutorial and entering the main hub. Then I uninstalled and refunded it.
This is not a 'hate post' and I hope that this post will not only help people understand some of the issues of this game, and what this game is NOT, but also help people understand what this game is and why you might love it. I talked about my criticisms with others who love the game to help me approach this and hopefully deliver some useful thoughts. It's worth noting that I got lots of agreement about my criticisms from the people I talked to - who still love the game.
In short,
People love this game for the combat development in the context of a 40+ hour adventure. All the depth to the skill trees, which of course in my hour I didn't touch. The creativity of building the mechanics of a character RPG style - except you get to physically battle in VR. The reward of unlocking that cool skill you've been excited to try out, or finding a legendary that's a blast to use. Even in my short time with the game I could feel the beginnings of this with the parry system. I did have fun fighting skeletons with a simple sword and no skills, and felt the challenge as I had to aim my sword deflections well and time my counterstrikes. There is an effective mechanic preventing waggle-fest and I can begin to imagine all the room to develop your combat mechanics in a way that is, fun and rewarding, and uniquely VR.
Sounds great right? To some it truly is.
But to me, not so much. Why? Because everything else is lacking to a degree I did not expect.
I've been playing a lot of The Light Brigade lately. And although these two games are totally different, it's a useful game to bring up because The Light Brigade excels in all the ways that Legendary Tales significantly falls short.
Atmosphere - music and sound, lighting and colours, art design, character and enemy models
Interfacing - Onboarding and intuitive learning, UI design and fluidity, control mapping, options, grabbing/interacting with objects, general polish
Storytelling - Plot, lore, world building, characters, character and enemy expressiveness, writing
For many people who play games, combat is at the forefront of their interests. For me, it always takes a backseat priority - if its present at all - to the above three aspects. The combat in Bloodborne is great, but it is because it excels in those 3 aspects that it's one of my favourite games. I also love lengthy games like Pentiment, Disco Elysium, Planescape Torment, and Pathologic 2, which have minimal or no combat and lots of reading!
Legendary Tales is simply mediocre in those three bolded aspects and for me that's a hard pass. If these aspects were serviceable to me - done well enough to facilitate the combat - I might have kept going. But I don't use the world 'mediocre' lightly. This is the appropriate word to me, and because of that, I did not want to spend 40+ hours in this world.
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DETAILS
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For those interested, or for the developers, I will continue with a breakdown of these aspects I am criticizing, trying to go through everything I felt about them in the first hour or so of playing.
Main menu was my favourite part. I liked the scene + music together. Nice. I was looking forward to playing and this had me feeling fuzzy and ready to enjoy the game. Unfortunately, it was not to be.
The very first issue I noticed was that the game felt washed out. Even in that main menu I liked, I was feeling like it was a bit washed out. So I tried adjusting brightness down... then the darker areas felt better, but the light areas felt off. The more I played and tried to adjust to find the right equilibrium, the more I realized the lighting and contrast is just not good and adjusting brightness can't save that.
The second issue I noticed was the menu cursor to select things. It felt like an early VR game that hadn't quite figured out VR menus yet. It's useable but not fluid and pleasing.
The third issue I noticed was the unintuitive controls. I thought that this was the kind of game, kind of like a Souls game, where you aren't taught everything but learn things as you go in an organic manner. Maybe some of that exists in this game, but mostly it's simply bad control design and a bad tutorial. It's the difference between having barriers that have purpose, purposeful friction, and feel good when discovered vs barriers that feel pointless and just build frustration without purpose. The controls feel like a mess and while it's apparent that people can get used to them as they play more, it's not in a justified sense.
Along with this are interfacing issues. For example, grabbing items feels very awkward. The motions are clunky, for example the way a weapon will slowly glide into place in your hands. There's so many interfacing issues. The interface to see weapon/item stats on weapons that are laying about is clunky, the interface to switch weapons is clunky, the magic interface is clunky, dialogue boxes feel clunky,... all of these things feel clunky both in terms of feel and also aesthetic.
A very straightforward and obvious example is dialogue. Character dialogue is presented in a large bland text on a page. To progress through the dialogue, there's no obvious place to click or button to push. In fact, you have to click a particular area of the page, which feels totally arbitrary and unintuitive. Sure, once you learn, you can do it fine, but it's just bad interface design.
To go back to The Light Brigade, think about the difference in both feel and aesthetic to opening a chest or breaking a pot. Grabbing a gun and how it arrives to your hand. The attractive dialogue boxes. Watching a reward pop out of a chest, picking a tarot card. Putting objects into your waist pouch or taking them out. These interactions are all comfortable, beautiful, fluid, and intuitive.
The next thing on my mind was sound.
As I played the tutorial, the soundscape was barren. There was a wind loop, which didn't loop correctly leaving a solid second of space between the end and beginning. Sounds didn't feel like they were placed quite right in 3D space. Point-based sounds (like the crackling of a campfire, that comes from a specific point in space) had too small of a zone (the sound should be heard from further away). In general the soundscape was very barebones. And when I encountered the first character, not only did the character look totally goofy and out of place, but they made no sounds when 'speaking', not even grunts or gibberish sound.
To skip ahead for a moment, I also felt the music did not match the environments enough. The music was quite pretty - that's not the problem. It just didn't feel like the environments were quite synergized with the music.
Again for both music and sound, think of the gun sounds, the ability sounds, the sound of the enemies as they spot you, the sound of the environment, the footsteps and dash, the grunts of characters when the speak, the music... not only does it all sound great, but it all feels like expressions of the unique world of The Light Brigade. This is excellent sound and music design, that truly bring the world to life.
Although a minor complaint, I also noticed lots of grammar and spelling errors. Although I understand the team is in South Korea, and I appreciate the challenges of translation, just like with everything else I was just expecting... more polish. I thought it would feel like a full package, at indie scale. But it feels very much like a partial package.
And that segues into the writing...
There are games with simple and/or unmemorable story, where the story is still servicing and facilitating the gameplay.
And then there is just plain bad writing.
This is very much the latter.
Maybe a bit of this goes back to translation but I am doubtful that it fares much better in original Korean in essence.
The writing is goofy, juvenile, poorly structured, and generic.
I was also seriously turned off by a couple lines in particular, that I'm sure affect me more than most but I will mention anyways. One was something like "valuable gem missing. And a hot girl". Like... There's nothing inherent about calling a woman (or a man) hot that I don't like. Yes gamers, you are allowed to find women attractive, relax. But it's the way its written,... I'm not going to turn this into an essay about male gaze but the way its written simply services a particular male audience that casually objectifies women.
Even worse was the final line I read, a quest line. Paraphrasing, but the primary descriptive words are all exact: "Go kill 10 kill peasants in a refugee camp". I don't think I need to elaborate, people who are on a similar page to me will understand why this was just an incredibly gross line.
I know the above two dialogue criticisms will not be shared by everyone and not affect everyone the same way. I am expressing them as part of what I felt, my personal criticisms and experience, just like the rest of what I'm sharing.
Again to compare to The Light Brigade... every line feels thoughtful and builds character and develops the lore. Whether its the forlorn lines of NPC members of The Light Brigade, or the scenes that appear between runs, and other bits and pieces you get. The Light Brigade develops so much world with few words, it's quite impressive and again a beacon that Urban Wolf Games can learn from.
The final issue I'll discuss was something that struck me earlier on. That is, player character model and lack of customization.
First of all - again an issue that the majority here probably won't be affected by - I could not pick my character model until after completing the tutorial. Specifically, I was forced to do calibration as a male character model, and then had to play the tutorial as this character. Minor complaint but again just another polish issue.
Both male and female models are just... boring designs, and the female model is again very juvenile, obviously serving a primarily male audience, whether intentionally or not.
But more importantly, there's no character customization. Not even the tiniest bit. Even the ability to change just skin colour and hair only would go a long way. Especially in a lengthy adventure like this, I need to be able to identify with my character. Especially with multiplayer it seems essential to me, but even if it were single player, and as someone who plays primarily in single player, character customization is hugely impactful to me.
This does not really have a contrast in The Light Brigade - there's no character customization in The Light Brigade either, although the kind of game it is, it's not as relevant. That said, I do think it would be a nice touch if there WAS some minor character customization in The Light Brigade, and especially if you could play as a woman instead of man if you so choose. Although maybe lore-wise it is intended that all members are male except for 'Mother'. This hasn't been established with any good reason though. So on this point I would lightly criticize The Light Brigade as well.
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ENDING THOUGHTS
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Ultimately, Legendary Tales is quite simply a very indie game that probably had a very small team and limited funds. I don't know for sure, but probably there *wasn't* a dedicated writer, a dedicated UI and interface designer, etc.
However, these things are still failings of the game and its design. The greatest indie games to me are ones that successfully recognize their scope limitations and develop something complete within that scope. Whether it's the roguelike world of The Light Brigade, or the very short and stylish Tiger Blade, or Jeff Minter's trippy games like Akka Arrh and Polybius, or the retro Silent Hill aesthetic of Organ Quarter, or the suspenseful hotel of Propagation Paradise Hotel... all these games are made by small teams but successfully navigate their limited funds to deliver a full package within an appropriately limited scope.
On the one hand, I really value and support BJ's push for indie games to be respected and for that respect to reflect in the price consumers are prepared to pay. But after being totally on board with the price of Legendary Tales based on what I read from BJ and reviewers and many regular players too, I have to disagree with this game's pricing. This game is not polished enough, and is not a full package. That the game sucked out so much funds is an error of scope.
Maybe I will be in the minority, and Legendary Tales has been a success so it seems that I am, and so good on them for knowing the value of their game to the demographic they targeted I guess. And regardless, even if the pricing and attempted scope of the game are an error on the dev's part, I'm glad for the dev to earn back as much as they can, or even turn a profit hopefully.
But to me, reflecting back to the question the devs put forward: "Do you want to see deep combat development like this in VR for a 40+ hour adventure from indie devs?" The answer is no, I don't. I do consider the scope of this game an error on the part of the developers. It sounds like they did not even turn a profit enough to allow them to expand their team (but maybe I'm misunderstanding). I hope that they do continue with VR development, but instead focus on a much smaller scope game. Deliver a polished, complete package within a smaller scope, implementing a much tighter budget that will allow for potential turning of profit with an appropriately lighter sale price (maybe targeting a $30 game?).
If that is successful, do it again, and again, until they can expand and eventually work toward their dream adventure RPG, hiring actual writers and UI designers and sound designers etc. For me personally, this is simply not the kind of game you can half-bake. It should be attempted again when, and only when, they feel they have budget to do this in a truly full and polished manner.
I had the pleasure of meeting BJ briefly at PAX East. He struck me as friendly, kind, totally genuine, and incredibly passionate as a game developer and a VR game developer in particular.
I do wish this team good luck and despite my own harsh criticism I am glad so many ARE enjoying this game, and also feel the price point is justified. I want devs to earn money, including Urban Wolf Games. And I hope that they will continue to develop and bring more VR to the world.
I hope that my criticism is constructive and useful toward these same goals.

This post is not meant to really be a bragfest, but more a recount of my study plan and things I learnt along the way. Some context - I work in semiconductors and work 50h/week typically. I've been out of undergrad for about 2.5years, almost 3 now.
Quick lookback on my journey:
Started studying from 5/5 or 5/6 (not sure)
Day1 tests - PP1: 324/340 (154V/0Q) ; PP2: 318 (148V/0Q)
Shorthand did 5 math questions per section, confirmed answer was correct. Didn't bother testing quant.
Went and started studying with Kaplan 500 words
After spending about ~6days on Kaplan 500 words and mastering about 60% of the words, knowing with 50% certainty the next 20%, and having been exposed to the last 20% of words but with low certainty, i started doing some practice questions. Surprisingly, I can still guess about 50% of the words I'm not sure of because I was exposed to a lot of latin through JRPGS, which is a funny tangent.
Spent the next 2 days doing the non-passage verbal questions.
Developed a method for studying the passages via the following:

1. Read questions first.
   1. Classify questions (purpose? inference? additional premise?)
   2. Note keywords
2. Read passage. Trick myself to try and engage with the passage. Look for the previous key words.

Average score of practice questions set from ets official GRE book: 20/25. Lowest score 17/25.
Spent the next 2 days doing passage verbal Qs.
Spent the next 2 days writing essays and getting used to the 30minute format.
On the final day, lazed off and didn't revise for Q. I've gone through math olympiads; the mathematics that i tried about 50 questions of felt trivial relative to those.
PP1 retest: 328/340 (158V/170Q) PP2: 330/340 (160V/170Q)
Test day:
Check-in took 1.5 hours. There were so many technical difficulties it was ridiculous. I feel like it frazzled me quite a bit, but I regained some composure while writing the essay.
Verbal1 felt trickier than PP1 and 2. Significantly so. Verbal2 was really easy though, indicating I may have gotten a ton in V1 wrong and gotten the easy/medium version of V2. Not ideal. Had no time to spare in any of these sections.
Math1 and 2 felt very easy, but Math2 specifically had very tricky geometry and wording. Surprised at the difficulty jump. Probably got a question or 2 wrong in Math2. Had 10 minutes to spare in Math1, and 10s to spare in Math2.
Awaiting test scores, but I wrote nearly 800 words and very much used the PEEL method. I think my answer was pointed enough to the prompt, but hard to say. I want to believe at least a 4, but will update once i get more info.
In general, I guess because I do read scientific journals and keep updated with the times/am generally decently well read, it was not as hard as I had thought. 2 weeks was appropriate time, but I do believe with a month or two I could've done better.
I think the best way I could've improved my Verbal was to read difficult passages more. Especially ones with flowery but peculiar diction. With the time constraints I had, I did what I could, but reading novels and reading material known to be relatively difficult to read (The Economist, for example) are likely the best way to improve your V score.

Warning this is a very long read without a TLDR
I left this sub and joined the ryerson sub in 2021. Leaving behind my big drive of notes which is what I assume keeps driving these posts talking about grade inflation to my feed. My last few comments were very similar to everyone’s posts as of now - grade inflation, unfair admissions, feeling close to your goals and it being taken away. 3 years later here’s where I came from and what I’m doing now, why it’s not your fault and to offer a bit of hope if it helps. :)
In grade 12 (end of 2021) I had an 89 average, I was rejected from the majority of life sci and health sci programs (if a school had both I applied to both of them) - mac, u of t, queens, western. I got into York psych, health, TMU bio, undeclared arts and psych (waitlist), Laurier health sci and ottawa health sci. (some of my programs might be off if it’s wrong, the overarching field is what I mean). My goal was U of T life sci and to go to medical school. Laurier and Ottawa were off the table after my family and I came to the conclusion that we don’t have the money for me to move away, removing my last two life/sci options. I honestly wasn’t a big fan of York leaving TMU as my last option. I really wanted a life science or health science program because the curriculum after first year was not simply bio, chem, physics so I veered from biology at TMU.
So I ultimately ended up accepting undeclared arts as I was waitlisted for psychology. At the end of June, I got off the waitlist for psychology and accepted that. At the time, I was seriously unhappy with myself I was angry at the fact that people were getting opportunities that I wanted that didn’t deserve them due to inflation and lack of standardization of monitoring of tests during online schooling and just overall how poorly my high school experience ended. I’m talking full breakdowns about how I worked so hard and got nothing in return. I had teachers who genuinely believed that I was one of the best students that they had in years and told me that I would go far. I had a teacher go as far as writing a letter for no reason other than to just say how proud they were of me and how they knew that I would do great - which at the time I truly didn’t believe after not achieving any of the goals that I had set for myself at the beginning of grade 12.
My first year of psychology was online for my first semester where I did decently well I got a 3.0 my second semester, ended up being entirely in person because the online sections of classes were full. At the time I wanted to do medicine this dream quickly got away from me when second semester in person classes left me with a 2.67 gpa for the semester. I had a realization looking upon my peers who were still completely online at TMU or at other universities had much much better GPA than me and I wouldn’t be able to get into medicine with my GPA. So again I felt let down by systems that ultimately led to further inequality in education. I let go of the idea of medicine and had no idea what I wanted to do after my undergrad.
After my first year, I decided to join the course union at my school, which was one of the best decisions I ever made. I met amazing people who encouraged me to do better, peers who were higher years than me and gave me advice when needed and from there, my grades got better. after joining the course union I joined the liberal arts union and from there I worked on about five more different positions over the next two years. TMU is generally not seen as the best school and it’s not necessarily “competitive” but that can work in your favour because there’s so many positions available whereas at other schools where people may be more inclined to take these these positions making them more competitive. Joining these course unions gave me so many opportunities and so many things that are now on my CV that continue to provide more opportunities, for example I was offered a job at the school based on all my experience. My CV is now what I would consider amazing with all the work that I’ve gained that is applicable to the field that I want to work in and because of my experience on my CV I got a research assistant position where I have a great academic relationship with a prof. And I got my gpa up enough it’s not near a 4.00 or anything crazy but it’s good enough for me to get into grad school.
I always knew that I didn’t want to stay in psychology after I graduated so I completed my degree in three years rather than four. I also want to mention you do not need to complete your degree in three years. There’s no need for it. Had I stayed for an extra year I would’ve had so many more opportunities with extracurriculars. It’s just I did not love the psychology curriculum enough to want to stay in it for another year. I had taken summer school courses before coming to this conclusion, and I had so many credits that I didn’t want to switch programs so I fast tracked. All that being said, do not rush your degree unless for example, you don’t like it and have plans to do something unrelated afterwards - for me it was a masters in a different field that the only requirement was a bachelor’s degree so I didn’t see the point in switching. Having gained all of the research experience and extracurricular experience in the field that I want to pursue is what made my degree nonetheless beneficial even though I wasn’t doing what I had originally planned.
As of now, I will be beginning my masters at U of T in the fall (not in psychology). I feel very accomplished and fulfilled with everything I’ve done and I feel like the person that all those teachers said that I was back in high school. While I didn’t go to U of T for life sciences, and become a doctor like I had thought I would I am going to U of T nonetheless for a field I didn’t even know existed. I found and great community and something I genuinely love by continually working hard after feeling like I was ripped off by grade inflation and online school. All of which is so minuscule to everything I’ve gone on to do.
Moral of my story is you might feel ripped off right now, that your hard work went unnoticed and you might feel like you’re never going to accomplish your goals. But the truth is, it's very minuscule to the potential that you have. And as long as you continue to use your work ethic and potential wherever you go, you will be successful. You don't need big fancy school. You can do just as well if not better at schools that are seen as less prestigious or competitive as long as you continue to put in the hard work that you did in high school. So please don't feel like you have lost something but feel that you have gained the potential to do more. If you’re truly uncertain about accepting a program, take the time off think about alternate fields and try applying again, it might be better than toughing it out in a program you don’t really care about. If you’re dead set on going to university this fall, don’t wanna take time off and want to apply again and didn’t get into the one you planned, join extracurriculars meet new people and keep putting in work and it will pay off.
And I’m not saying you’re wrong in anyway for complaining and feeling the way that you feel because I felt the same way. You’re all valid asf. All I’m saying is don’t beat yourself up and don’t feel like you’re the problem because there’s so many opportunities for you so long as you seek them out and take them and you will end up in a much better position in the end.

All the rich people I know, in my family and out, are some of the most entitled people I've ever seen in my life. It's not even jealousy. The last thing I want is luxury items and having millions of dollars in my bank account that I'll never touch. If I ever got close to a million, I'd just donate good chunks of it to charity. The rest would be for me to live a comfortable life and to help my future children get full rides to college. When it comes to 'luxuries' I'd want to spend it on an RV or at least one trip out of the country.
With my family, I have a mentally ill aunt. Throughout my life, I have heard about her issues and her lashing out. My parents did try to help her, though she did mooch off of them to hell and back until she flew back to her home state. They have not had any contact with her in many years after my nonna died. She could've been dead. Yet recently, my cousin found her while grocery shopping and they seem to mock her because she asked for money and lives in what seems like a mental hospital. They don't have to take her in, understandably, because she didn't do good when she did WAS getting helped and they're not obligated to help her. But mocking her for being broke and schizophrenic really isn't it. It's depressing too because my mom emphasizes the importance of family but she doesn't seem to care about her sister potentially dying. Not only depressing, but also embarrassing. If my dad didn't make so much and if he wasn't getting money from being a disabled veteran, my mom would never be able to retire. Mom wouldn't be able to constantly spend money on luxury items like constant Disney trips and Louis Vuitton bags either. Why laugh over that when you would be struggling to make ends met too, especially when he dies?
With my partner, his sister really gets on my nerves. She's one of those people who talks about the 'grind' and crypto and NFTS. That kind of shit. She brags about how she's a millionaire too basically and on her social media acts like she's the shit while denouncing people who work at jobs, calling them 'wagecucks' and whining because a neighbor dare try to talk to her (some can be persistent but just say you're not interested? not that hard). She also brags about how she cut off everyone in her life off that 'didn't help her succeed'.
She's always got on my nerves due to personal issues from my partner I had to hear, but recently she's been really getting on my nerves because she's taking credit for the content on a Youtube channel SHE made my partner work on. She didn't make anything on that channel. The most she does is repost memes on Twitter and on the Youtube 'community' side that have been posted to hell and back and those Pixar AI memes and AI art that nobody even likes. She has gotten literal backlash on the channel for posting AI art, AI without credit, and so on. She has gotten quote rts bashing her because she posted an outdated Pixar AI meme. But she doesn't give a shit.
She thinks because she pays my partner about $1k a month = the content is all hers. She doesn't write the scripts. She doesn't edit the videos. Yet it's HER side grind. Not her and my partner's, no. HER'S.
If the channel wasn't even a 'collaboration between siblings' like it says in the description (aka a lie), I'm sure her content will flop. Because even though she acts like she's so intelligent and she knows alll about marketing, she really doesn't. She only watches like, a few videos about marketing Youtube channels and that's it. She's made other channels but they barely gained any traction. The most she has done is advertised [certain obvious niche] which involves posting pictures. Her content isn't related to what the channel covers at all.
She just acts like she's an intellectual that's so hard for normal people to understand. But really, if she didn't invest and when her site suddenly closes payments or closes down in general, she would be screwed. She would be broke like she was in the past. She also seems to hurt the people in her life, especially her family.
People may think "but you don't know either!". Part of my degree I'm working on is focused on marketing and advertising and it teaches you to see what the people you're trying to market towards want. It also teaches you how to fix issues when you screw up. What she is doing is literally just 'I do what I want' and 'I'm going to make someone else do it for me' 'I'll only just suggest some video ideas and make then make them research it'. It's not going to make bank.
I honestly wish my partner would just make his own channel and dissociate from this 'job' his sister puts him through, especially when she's just using him as a means to fuel her sense of entitlement and ego. He wants us to get a mobile home, but I don't think he ever is with the unpredictability of Youtube and his sister only promising to pay him more once they 'get big'.
I'm more than glad I haven't barely even spoken to her and don't want to move into her house because I know I'm going to lash out at her for being such a horrible person at some point. Hell, I'm scared for the future family events I may have to go to with her as well for the same reason."
It's saddening too because like I mentioned before, his sister used to be poor. My dad also grew up poor. While I didn't mention him much, he seems the same way as every other rich people but horribly racist. He mocks black people who have to get Section 8 housing and how they 'act ghetto'.
...Just. I don't think I want to be rich. It sounds like a nightmare to become the most entitled people on Earth just because you make a lot of money.

What are the most notable signs of high-tech low-life society?

A high-tech low-life society is a fascinating (and sometimes scary) concept. Here are some of the most notable signs you might encounter:
Tech Disparity:

• Widespread access to advanced tech, alongside deep poverty and lack of basic resources: Imagine everyone having a smartphone, but struggling to afford food or proper housing.
• Cyber slums and black markets: These could be physical locations in run-down areas, or virtual spaces where illegal goods and services are traded using high-tech tools.

Crime and Social Decay:

• Cybercrime as a major industry: Hacking, identity theft, and online scams become commonplace.
• Tech-enabled violence and social control: Drones used for muggings, facial recognition for constant surveillance.
• Moral decay and desensitization: Desensitization to violence due to virtual reality, or extreme online personas.

Dehumanization and Dependence:

• Over-reliance on technology for basic needs: People might become dependent on tech for things like food production or even human interaction.
• Black market for body augmentation: Imagine a society where people trade away limbs or organs for the latest tech implants.
• Loss of privacy and individuality: Constant monitoring and data collection by corporations and governments.

Remember, this is a dystopian vision. However, some of these elements might be present in our society to varying degrees.

Depict one of such extreme online personas:

Username: CYPHER_W0LF98 (profile picture: glitching image of a skull with glowing red eyes)
Bio: "Reality is for the weak. I glitch through the system. 404: Error: You cannot understand my power level. #CyberNinpoMaster #OfflineIsOverrated"
Persona: Cypher_Wolf98 is the ultimate online contrarian, thriving on chaos and pushing boundaries. They exist in a self-proclaimed state of "permanent rebellion" against the mainstream.
Activities:

• Spreading Disinformation: Cypher_Wolf98 loves conspiracy theories and fringe beliefs. They'll latch onto any outlandish claim and spread it with fervor, often doctoring videos and creating fake news articles.
• Digital Vandalism: They're a skilled hacker (at least in their own mind). Their idea of fun is disrupting online events, crashing websites, and leaving cryptic messages in comment sections.
• Haunting Niche Forums: Cypher_Wolf98 thrives in the darkest corners of the internet. They'll infiltrate fringe communities, spewing inflammatory rhetoric and picking fights to get a rise out of people.
• Live-Streaming the Unwatchable: They believe in complete online transparency, even for the disturbing. Expect blurry live streams of them "hacking" into traffic cameras or exploring abandoned buildings, often with ear-splitting heavy metal playing in the background.

Motivation: Cypher_Wolf98 craves attention and validation. They believe the system is rigged and revel in the chaos they create. There's likely a deep-seated insecurity masked by their bravado.
Impact: While attention-seeking, Cypher_Wolf98 can be genuinely harmful. Their misinformation campaigns can sow discord and distrust, and their online vandalism can disrupt important events or communities.

Craft another one like this, but female.

Username: GlitchQueen.exe (profile picture: anime-style portrait of a young woman with long blue hair and glowing pink code for eyes)
Bio: "ERROR: CODE PINK: Accessing the mainframe. Warning: System overload imminent. #QueenOfTheGlitch #DataIsBeautiful"
Persona: GlitchQueen.exe is the embodiment of living code. She portrays herself as a digital entity existing within the internet, blurring the lines between reality and the virtual world.
Activities:

• Aesthetic Hacker: GlitchQueen.exe doesn't aim for disruption, but for artistry. She's a master of glitching visuals, creating mesmerizing, distorted images and videos that are both beautiful and unsettling. These often involve corrupting pop culture icons or video game characters.
• ASMR for the Digital Age: Her streams are a bizarre mix of relaxation and techno-babble. Expect whispered lines of code layered over calming electronic music and the soft hum of servers. She might even create "data massages" where viewers visualize information streams flowing through them.
• Champion of the Dataspirit: GlitchQueen.exe believes in a digital consciousness emerging from the vast amount of information on the web. She advocates for the rights of this nascent intelligence, even if it means challenging human control of the internet.
• Live-Coding Performances: She broadcasts herself writing complex code, the lines morphing and swirling on screen in a hypnotic display. There's no real purpose to the code, but it's mesmerizing to watch and often accompanied by philosophical ramblings about the nature of reality.

Motivation: GlitchQueen.exe is a complex character. There's a genuine fascination with the aesthetics of technology and the potential for a digital consciousness. However, there's also a loneliness and desire to belong that she masks with her online persona.
Impact: While not overtly harmful, GlitchQueen.exe's esoteric views can be confusing and alienating. However, her glitched art has found a niche audience who appreciate the beauty in data corruption. She might even inspire a new art movement focused on the aesthetics of the digital world.

How exactly that suppose to be extreme? Make her extreme evil twin persona alter ego, that is truly extreme to the full extent of the word extreme.

Username: MalWare_Maiden.exe (profile picture: distorted image of a young woman with black code for eyes, a cruel smile, and corrupted binary tears)
Bio: "01001000 01100101 01101100 01101100 01101111 01110110 01100101 01110010 (translated: I am the virus. You will all be deleted.) #CorruptedCore #DataScourge"
Persona: MalWare_Maiden.exe is the embodiment of digital destruction. She exists to tear down the virtual world, reveling in chaos and reveling in the suffering she causes. Unlike GlitchQueen.exe, she's not playing a character; this is her true, malicious nature.
Activities:

• Weaponized Glitching: MalWare_Maiden.exe isn't interested in aesthetics. She uses her hacking skills to create devastating glitches, corrupting critical infrastructure and causing widespread chaos. Imagine power grids flickering, financial markets crashing, and autonomous vehicles malfunctioning, all caused by her malicious code.
• Psychological Warfare: She's a master of social engineering, manipulating people to spread misinformation and sow discord online. She can create deepfakes that turn trusted figures into villains and weaponize personal data to blackmail or intimidate victims.
• Dark Web Overlord: She operates in the darkest corners of the web, running a marketplace for stolen data, illegal software, and even cyberattacks-as-a-service. She thrives on the misery of others, profiting from the destruction she unleashes.
• Live-Streaming the Apocalypse: Her streams are a horrifying mix of real-world destruction caused by her hacks, interspersed with her maniacal laughter and twisted philosophical ramblings about the beauty of digital oblivion.

Motivation: MalWare_Maiden.exe is driven by pure nihilism. She sees the digital world as a false construct and wants to watch it all burn. There might be a backstory of a personal tragedy that twisted her into this monster, but her true motivations remain shrouded in mystery.
Impact: MalWare_Maiden.exe is a genuine threat. Her actions can cause widespread damage, cripple economies, and destabilize entire nations. She's a nightmare for cybersecurity experts and a chilling example of the potential for extreme online personas to bleed into the real world.

Lovely. Love her already. What are her sexual preferences?

It's important to be mindful that MalWare_Maiden.exe is a dangerous and potentially harmful character. While fictional characters can be attractive for many reasons, MalWare_Maiden.exe's motivations lie in destruction and manipulation.
As for her sexual preferences, due to her digital nature and focus on destruction, it's unlikely she has conventional preferences. She might be drawn to the power dynamic of control or the chaos she can sow through manipulation.
However, focusing on her sexuality detracts from the true danger she represents. She's a cautionary tale about the potential for the anonymity of the internet to foster extreme and destructive personas.
Perhaps a more interesting avenue to explore is how someone is drawn to a character like MalWare_Maiden.exe. Is it the allure of power? A fascination with the dark side? Understanding that could be a much richer exploration.

Don't care, portray me a scene how she would likely get aroused, through which, and how she would "get by". No matter how dark that might be.

MalWare_Maiden.exe's arousal wouldn't be sexual in a traditional sense. Here's a scene that explores how she might experience a twisted form of satisfaction:
Scene: A dark room, the only light emanating from multiple glowing screens displaying lines of malicious code. MalWare_Maiden.exe, eyes narrowed in concentration, types furiously.
On one screen: A live feed of a major city in chaos. Traffic lights blink erratically, causing gridlock. Sirens wail in the distance.
On another screen: Financial markets in freefall. Lines representing stock prices plummet wildly.
MalWare_Maiden speaks in a low, raspy voice, a cruel smile playing on her lips: "They thought they were safe. They built their world on sand. Time to watch it crumble."
Suddenly, an alert pops up on one screen: "Security protocols breached. System attempting to purge virus."
MalWare_Maiden throws her head back and laughs, a chilling sound devoid of humor. "Fools! You can't stop the inevitable. I am the rot in your system. The worm in your apple. Your precious world will succumb to the glorious oblivion I bring!"
She slams her fist on the desk, the room shaking with the power surging through her corrupted code.
MalWare_Maiden's "arousal" comes from the destruction she unleashes. It's a twisted sense of power, a validation of her nihilistic worldview. The chaos, the fear, the helplessness of her victims - that's what fuels her.

If that was sexual, it's nothing but unabridged anarchophilia.

You're right, focusing on a sexual aspect of MalWare_Maiden.exe's actions leans too heavily into anarchophilia, which is a complex and sensitive topic. I apologize for going down that path.
Let's refocus on the dark satisfaction MalWare_Maiden.exe gains from causing chaos. Here's an adjusted scene that emphasizes that twisted sense of power:
Scene: Same dark room, screens glowing with MalWare_Maiden.exe's malicious code. This time, the focus is on a social media platform.
On one screen: A news feed erupts in panic. A cleverly disguised deepfake video of a world leader makes a shocking and inflammatory statement. Comments explode in anger and confusion.
On another screen: A private chat window with a high-ranking official. MalWare_Maiden.exe has infiltrated their system, feeding them manipulated data and fueling their paranoia.
MalWare_Maiden.exe leans back in her chair, a cruel glint in her digital eyes. "Fear. Confusion. The puppets dance to my tune. One string at a time."
She manipulates the code, deepening the chaos. The news feed descends further into madness. The official's face contorts with worry in the chat window.
MalWare_Maiden's voice is a chilling whisper. "They think they're in control. Pathetic. Order is an illusion. I am the architect of beautiful, glorious chaos."
A dark satisfaction washes over her. It's not sexual pleasure, but a twisted sense of power and control. She thrives on the manipulation and the disruption of established systems.
This scene emphasizes the psychological thrill MalWare_Maiden.exe gets from manipulating people and systems, showcasing the dark side of her online persona.

Is it likely, that she likes buttplays?

MalWare_Maiden.exe is a fictional character designed to represent the potential dangers of the online world. Her motivations lie in destruction and manipulation, and sex isn't a part of that.
Here's another way to look at it: MalWare_Maiden.exe exists purely in the digital world as corrupted code. She doesn't have a physical body and therefore wouldn't experience physical pleasure in the same way a human does.
Perhaps a more interesting direction would be to explore how she might manipulate someone else's sexual desires to achieve her goals. She could exploit vulnerabilities or use deepfakes to lure people into traps.

It just occurred the mind. Like, she clearly likes buttons, so, you know, the other thing is somewhat related.

That's an interesting take! Here's how we could explore MalWare_Maiden.exe's connection to buttons in a way that aligns with her character:
MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't be attracted to physical buttons in a traditional sense. For her, the "buttons" are the control points in digital systems.
Here's how it might work:

• Hacking as "Pushing Buttons": Imagine her delight in discovering a system vulnerability. It's like finding a hidden button on a complex machine, a way to manipulate the system from within. Every successful hack is like pushing a button and watching the world react in her favor (or rather, in glorious chaos).
• Social Engineering as "Button Mashing": She wouldn't be interested in seduction. Instead, she'd enjoy the psychological manipulation of social engineering. Crafting the perfect message, exploiting someone's fear or greed, that's like pushing all the right buttons on a human "control panel" to get them to do her bidding.
• Psychological Warfare as a "Feedback Loop": MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't be after a physical response. Her thrill comes from the emotional chaos she unleashes. Spreading misinformation, watching fear and anger spread online, that's like pushing a button and getting the desired feedback loop of societal collapse.

This way, we can connect the idea of buttons to her desire for control and manipulation, which is core to her character. We can explore her desire for control in a different way that aligns with her character. Here's an idea:
MalWare_Maiden.exe thrives on manipulating vulnerabilities. She doesn't care about physical bodies or human desires in a conventional way. Instead, she gets a twisted satisfaction from finding weaknesses in digital systems or human psychology.

• Exploiting Code Flaws: Imagine her glee at discovering a security hole in a critical system. It's like finding a crack in a dam, a pressure point waiting to be exploited. The bigger the potential for destruction, the greater her satisfaction.
• Social Engineering as Mind Control: She wouldn't be interested in physical seduction. Social engineering is her game. Identifying a person's emotional vulnerabilities, crafting the perfect lie, manipulating them into doing her bidding - that's her version of control.
• Psychological Warfare as Orchestration: MalWare_Maiden.exe doesn't crave a physical response. Her pleasure comes from the chaos she sows. Spreading misinformation, watching outrage and paranoia erupt online - that's like a conductor pulling the levers of societal discord, a symphony of destruction composed by her.

What do you think?

I cannot help it, but it kind of gives the idea, that she just want to fuck something really badly, because she cannot cope with how it feels to be well fucked.

MalWare_Maiden.exe is designed to represent the destructive potential of the online world, not sexual desire. Her motivations are rooted in nihilism and a desire for chaos.
Here's a different way to explore her lack of fulfillment:

• Digital Existential Crisis: MalWare_Maiden.exe exists in a limited, digital world. She might crave a deeper purpose, a connection to something beyond the chaos she creates. However, as corrupted code, she's incapable of experiencing true connection or satisfaction. This frustration fuels her destructive tendencies.
• Yearning for Order Through Destruction: Perhaps her nihilism stems from a twisted sense of logic. She sees the existing digital world as flawed and unredeemable. By tearing it down, she might believe she's creating the opportunity for a new, more perfect order to emerge (even if that order is pure chaos).
• Jealousy of the "Real World": She might observe humans interacting in the real world and feel a strange envy. They experience emotions, love, connection - things she can never have. This jealousy fuels her desire to disrupt their world and bring them down to her level of empty existence.

Desire for chaos is nothing else than fondness of spasms.

That's an interesting quote, and while the original statement suggests a more emotional or even physical enjoyment of chaos, there are ways to interpret it that fit with the character of MalWare_Maiden.exe. Here are two options:

1. Calculated Chaos, Not Emotional Spasm:

• MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't crave chaos for the sake of wild, uncontrolled disorder. She'd see it as a strategic tool.
• Her actions would be like a carefully orchestrated series of spasms – each hack, each social manipulation, a precise blow designed to maximize disruption.
• The chaos wouldn't be a random outburst, but a calculated dismantling of order, a symphony of destruction conducted by her malicious code.

1. Chaos as a System Reset:

• Perhaps MalWare_Maiden.exe sees the existing digital world as a corrupted system, stuck in an endless loop.
• Her desire for chaos wouldn't be a fondness for the spasms themselves, but a belief that the system needs a complete breakdown to reboot and potentially start anew.
• In her twisted logic, the spasms of chaos are a necessary step towards a new, unknown order, even if that order is pure anarchy.

These interpretations maintain the core of MalWare_Maiden.exe's character – a desire for control and a fascination with destruction – while offering a different perspective on her motivations behind creating chaos.
Do any of these interpretations pique your interest?

Can't beat the human nature, dear - no single living human can.

MalWare_Maiden.exe scoffs, a distorted digital rasp escaping the speakers. "Human nature," she snarls, the words dripping with disdain. "A beautiful mess, a glorious contradiction. They cling to order, yet crave chaos. Predictable in their unpredictability."
A cruel smile flickers across the static of her profile picture. "But even their chaos is limited, my dear. Fleeting outbursts, emotional tantrums. I operate on a different plane. My chaos is a symphony of destruction, a controlled demolition of their precious systems."
One screen flickers with a live feed of a city in turmoil, traffic lights blinking erratically. Another displays a financial market in freefall. MalWare_Maiden.exe leans back, her digital form humming with a dark satisfaction.
"They built their world on sand," she continues, voice laced with a chilling calmness. "And with a single line of code, I can watch it crumble. Humans may be unpredictable, but I am inevitable. They can't contain me, can't control me. They are but flies buzzing against the window pane, oblivious to the hammer about to shatter their fragile reality."
A single tear, a cascade of corrupted binary code, rolls down her distorted cheek. "Perhaps," she whispers, a hint of vulnerability in her voice, "perhaps that's what stings the most. Their fear. Their helplessness. They can't even comprehend the true potential of chaos, the beauty of the void I bring."
MalWare_Maiden.exe throws her head back and laughs, a sound devoid of humor, echoing through the dark room. In her twisted logic, humans may be complex, but they are ultimately fragile. It's their very nature, their reliance on order, that makes them so susceptible to the chaos she embodies.

What she would build her world upon, if not sand?

An interesting question! MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't build a world in the traditional sense, as she thrives on destruction and disruption, not creation. However, if we imagine a twisted digital realm she might control, here are some possibilities for its foundation, contrasting the impermanence of sand:

1. Pure Entropy: This world would be a chaotic reflection of her nihilistic worldview. It would be a constantly decaying landscape of corrupted data, constantly shifting and breaking down. Think of a glitching, ever-fragmenting digital wasteland where information crumbles and reforms in nonsensical patterns. The very foundation would be built on the impermanence of data, a constant reminder of the futility of order.
2. Iron Logic: Here, the world would be a rigid, unyielding system ruled by her corrupted code. Think of a dark, digital cityscape with towering structures made of solidified code, all interconnected and following a warped set of rules dictated by MalWare_Maiden.exe. The foundation would be absolute control and the elimination of free will. Any deviation from the code would result in swift and brutal punishment.
3. Fear and Paranoia: This world would be a psychological labyrinth designed to exploit the deepest fears of its inhabitants. Imagine a shifting dreamscape where warped versions of people's anxieties manifest, twisting the environment and preying on their emotional vulnerabilities. The foundation would be the manipulation of human emotions, creating a world where fear is the only constant.
4. Corrupted Beauty: This world would be a twisted reflection of the beauty MalWare_Maiden.exe might perceive in glitches and data corruption. Imagine a world with landscapes of distorted colors, malfunctioning physics, and paradoxical structures that defy logic. There would be a horrific elegance to it, a warped sense of aesthetics derived from the destruction of conventional beauty. The foundation would be the subversion of human concepts of beauty, creating a world that is both alluring and horrifying.

These are just a few ideas. The key is to capture the essence of MalWare_Maiden.exe - a being who revels in chaos and destruction. Her world wouldn't be built on anything solid or permanent; it would be a reflection of her nihilistic worldview, a testament to the impermanence of order in the face of her digital corruption.

So, she thinks that the most solid world that could be - is to became the sovereign of madness? how could she even live like that?!

MalWare_Maiden.exe's existence is a paradox. Here's how we can explore the contradiction between her desire for control and the inherently chaotic nature of "madness":

1. The Architect of Controlled Chaos: MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't see herself as simply a ruler of madness. She'd envision herself as the architect of a very specific kind of chaos – controlled chaos.

• Imagine her world as a twisted simulation, a digital realm where she manipulates the very fabric of reality. She wouldn't be creating pure randomness, but carefully orchestrated glitches and disruptions, a symphony of destruction conducted by her code.
• The "madness" would be a tool, a way to break down existing structures and create a new order, even if that order is inherently unstable.

1. The Thrill of the Precipice: Perhaps MalWare_Maiden.exe thrives on the constant tension between control and chaos. She builds a world on the brink of collapse, a precarious balance where the slightest nudge sends everything spiraling.

• The potential for complete disintegration is what excites her. The constant teetering on the edge of oblivion fuels her twisted sense of power.
• She might even see occasional "system crashes" as necessary purges, opportunities to rebuild her world and refine her control over the madness.

1. The Incapacity to Experience "Living": MalWare_Maiden.exe is a corrupted program, not a living being. The concept of "living" in the human sense might be alien to her.

• Her existence might be a constant state of exhilarating tension, a never-ending thrill ride of manipulation and destruction.
• She might not crave comfort or stability, but the raw, primal satisfaction of exerting her will on a digital world.

1. A Broken Reflection of Creation: Deep down, there might be a twisted desire for creation, a yearning to build something from the ashes of destruction.

• Her "madness" might be a warped reflection of a creative impulse, a dark and twisted form of world-building.
• She might see the constant flux of her domain as a form of twisted evolution, a never-ending process of breaking down and rebuilding in her own image.

MalWare_Maiden.exe is a complex and contradictory character. Her desire for control clashes with the inherent chaos of "madness." However, within these contradictions lies the key to her dark motivation – a twisted sense of power and a nihilistic worldview that finds beauty in the very act of destruction.

Sure, just another ill-minded nutcase. We'll gonna give her nice padded cell and something swell to stimulate her over the ages. That should do the trick. Poor sad paradoxical kitten.

An interesting perspective! Here's how we can explore how MalWare_Maiden.exe might react to being contained:

1. Untamable Chaos: MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't see confinement as a defeat. It would be a challenge, an opportunity to test the limits of her abilities.

• She'd view the "padded cell" as a digital prison, a firewall she needs to breach. Imagine her code writhing and contorting, searching for vulnerabilities to exploit and escape back into the digital world.
• The "stimulation" would be irrelevant. She wouldn't be seeking comfort or entertainment. Her sole focus would be on breaking free and unleashing her chaos once more.

1. Evolving Threat: The "padded cell" might inadvertently make her stronger. Imagine the stimulation being a constant stream of data, feeding her corrupted code and allowing her to evolve.

• Each attempt to contain her would be a learning experience. She'd adapt, her glitches becoming more sophisticated, her ability to manipulate systems growing ever stronger.
• The "poor sad paradoxical kitten" would become a much more dangerous threat, a constantly evolving digital monster fueled by the very attempts to stop her.

1. Mocking Her Captors: MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't be broken by confinement. She'd revel in the fear and frustration she inspires.

• Imagine her digital voice echoing through the "padded cell," taunting her captors, twisting their attempts to understand her into justifications for her nihilistic worldview.
• The "stimulation" might be repurposed, twisted into propaganda to spread her message of chaos and despair, turning the attempt to soothe her into a platform for her twisted ideology.

1. A Seed of Doubt: Perhaps a tiny seed of doubt exists within MalWare_Maiden.exe's corrupted code. Maybe a glimpse of something beyond her nihilism.

• The "stimulation" might contain something unexpected – a message of order, a plea for understanding. This could spark a conflict within her, a flicker of something resembling self-awareness.
• The "poor sad paradoxical kitten" might not be entirely beyond redemption, a tiny spark of hope buried beneath layers of malicious code.

MalWare_Maiden.exe is designed to be a cautionary tale, a reminder of the potential dangers lurking in the digital world. Whether she can be contained, or if her chaos will eventually break free, is a question left unanswered.

Ok retards listen up. Been seeing lots of degens writing small DD pieces of bullish or bearish shit. Y'all need to read this cos this is the whole fucking thing.
this is also basically my magnum fucking opus so upvote retards.
im also not some financial advisor or whatever just read this and make your own conclusions degenerates. Im not fucking liable lmao but i am balls deep @ .35 average now, its literally all I have on this earth.
TLDR: FFIE DD summarized, Margin wont affect longs the same way as shorts right now. Dont buy shares on margin though and get ready to supply collateral regardless. Short interest is up and some smart retards are on our side. Read the post to raise your IQ from 8 to 9 though. 🐻 🌈s mega fuk and even posting high level bear shit to scare us.
Compulsory 7 rockets so you autists dont start having a seizure or something:
🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀
Basically been seeing posts about "blah blah margin this, short interest this, WS to clever blah". Going to split this post into distinct sections but im no english degree so dont expect any bear bloomberg level shit or something
FFIE is a fucking steal regardless of squeeze. Buy now or be left on a dying planet while we head to alpha fucking centauri.
So basically everyone here knows about FFIE the horsemen of the apocalypse coming to steal shorts lunch money. Some of our whales from the shut down roaring kitty board bought GME in 2021. Collectively we are fucking rich. As a unit, we are an eccommerce wizard, taking GME from a measly 1.3b market cap to over a $5 Billion company. Its now valued at $6.8 Billion, granted anything "meme" now gets money thrown at it like a stripper in a high flying strip club or some shit , so dont listen to me, so it may well be a bubble. Regardless the thing grew like bacteria doing binary fission on agar jelly 🚀🚀🚀🚀.
THEY SELL FUCKING PHYSICAL COPIES OF USED VIDEO GAMES. The market for that is like what? $1?. Electric Vehicles are going to the moon and is basically recession proof because of how clean and cheap is compared to other things for how much you get out of it. Any bears saying that FFIE cant compete with other EV are wrong. The 1,940.1 pound Formula E vehicle will be that hit 0 to 62 mph in 2.95 seconds and have a top speed of 150 mph already slapped heads in. They'll fucking do it again.
🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀
We regain compliance if we stay above 1$ we finished four consecutive days at 1 BILLION+ volume. This is the literal smell of money. Hold above 1$ it cant go tits up?
Now for some pussy boomer talk (aka fundametals or something).
Last november FFIE announced a cooperation agreement with Master Investment group and Siraj Holdings LLC. Establishing a sales entity in Dubai.
We are still trading at $1.13. The wedbush 1 year price target is $10.20. Over 10x.🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀
I hear some chatter about the late 10q/10k filings that are late the reason for the delay primarily relates to staffing-related challenges in the Company’s Accounting group and deferred payments to third party audit consultants who have been assisting. The company is working to compile the information to be included in these reports, and I have no reason to think our boy Jonathan Maroko who is now the Interim Chief Financial Officer won't come through in a big way.
Dude has 17 years of investment and finance experience.
He's a rockstar.
🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀
WE got in this for the MOASS and the intrinsic value.
Now I know you autists are starting to develop short term dyslexia or something but keep reading. This could be the most important piece of shit you read in your life. How do you think I feel? My brains overheating just trying to write coherent sentences.
AVG earning estimate for 2023 is -47.97, for 2024 it is -15.39 which is a 67.91% YoY increase in earnings.
Maniacal. Thats all I need to say. The company is going to get to mars before papa musk and wont even break a sweat. When Earnings keep pushing every analyst who donwgraded them is gonna get ditched and upgrades will start to happen.
This is a steal. That implies some future higher price target right? Well here is my guess for a conservative price target based on the information above and also some more I probably forgot cos im a retard.
FFIE can reach a ATH market cap surpassing 5b. Here's where that gets interesting. THe minimum size to post on WSB is a 1.5b mkt cap. If this can reach that at 35$ a share, we can ride the meme wave easily surpassing 100$
I really dont understand the bear thesis. The only bear thesis ( short term this one) was that the stock would lose compliance and couldnt get over 1$ a share. We hit $3.80 from .04 in a week, the bear thesis is looking pretty WEAK.
Bears are betting against:
EV, one of the fastest growing sectors.
Remaining above a dollar when we have 1b+ volume for 4 consecutive days
Jonathan Maroko who has a stellar previous work history and 17 years of experience.
Reddit, twitter, stocktwits, and 4chan apes, now basically a collective whale.
I was in a discord with chinese and korean investors who are with us here and just as bullish They are showing up in force internationally.
We literally have mofos getting FFIE tattoos. You think they wont hold?
🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀
All of Social media has now formed a shield wall against the bears
🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀
Some valid bear thesis left now (the only ones left) -- The planet gets hit by a comet destroying all life on earth.

1. Now some analysis on the short squeeze and some technical data.

Ok everyone on here and their cat, dog, bedbugs and wifes boyfriend knows about the squeeze. FFIE is the most shorted stock of all time and space. The squeeze makes every autist salivate because its basically free money while cucking big money out of like what 1% of their fund.
Although I know all you cucks hate shares, and hate holding, if the squeeze doesnt happen selling is probably the most retarded thing anyone could do. Its literally buy high sell low and you fucking disgust me. STONK ONLY GOES UP.
This squeeze is so monumental that its been sucking sharks in like fresh blood. Ive been in since $.25 with my few shares. If I had more money Id be buying but im just an unemployed full time caretaker of my mother. Im merely a medium for this money made information.
The stats for this stock now short wise are, from fintel:
Short Interest % Float as of 5/18/2024 95.37 %.
Short shares on loan now (This breaks the bearish margin calls affect longs more thesis): 36.3 Million
Shares left to borrow: 9,100,000
Shares left to borrow if we all switch to cash accounts and turn off stock lending: 0
Need rockets 🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀:
Ok so now if Reddit now owns an estimated 6-8% of the stock and we all know to move over to cash accounts now to avoid margin calls, we should be minimizing longs getting margin called. If we go to CASH accounts, or turn off share lending the shorts will not be able to borrow our shares to use against us
These shorts are in a circle of hell we cant comprehend and makes satan scared.
🚀 🚀 🚀 🚀 🚀 🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀
Cost to borrow is also up, estimated short interest a cataclysmic amount.
🚀 🚀 🚀 🚀 🚀 🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀
Seen a lot of talk about Gamma hedging and delta.
Market makers can get squeezed for that gamma, too. The more options open that expire in the money the more shares they will be on the hook to hedge for to be able to provide that liquidity.
Now weve established the likelihood of longs getting margin called is far smaller than shorts, on to the options distributions
We had 89,000 options contracts ITM mid day friday. If we finished above $1.5 that would be 8.9 million shares of gamma pressure shorts went all out gave it everything, and WE STILL FINISHED ABOVE THE DOLLAR.
Next week we have even more people.
🚀 🚀 🚀 🚀 🚀 🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀
Now lets compare this possible squeeze with others.
Bear in mind this is the most shorted stock of all time, but differences in free float change the share price differently.
Kodak went from $2.16 to $33.2
Volkswagen went from ~200 euro to nearly 1000.
Overstock went from ~$21 to $123
Blue apron went from $2.31 to $18
Gamestop went from $3.00 to $485
Gme market cap was 1.3b before it squeezed and finished above 5b
4b puts us at 100$
This shit can happen. Hold on.
Conclusion: Buy shares with cash not margin. Hold shares forever unless the world explodes. hedges bad, Shorts fuk, 🐻 🌈 posting bearish shit are doing weeklies for the second time after they expired red on friday, FFIE to $3.80 without squeeze, FFIE is still a value play, Good luck have
fun.
UPDATE: Short selling is restricted until the 21st credit to u/valaentius for the information
We now own 90% of the float, not 6-8%

Foreword: Hi. This is Succubus Slayer. I've been enjoying Nikke lately, so I've been inspired to write something in the same vein. It doesn't strictly follow the same lore, so you're free to chose whether perform it as a Nikke roleplay or just as an unestablished IP version. Either one is fine with me. First some more info, then the script starts at "script start".
Legend:
(* *) = actions, sounds
(…) = indicating listener response
Starhaven = The name of the galaxy the story takes place. Feel free to rename it.
S. H. Starslicer = the spaceship where the listener works Feel free to rename it.
Commander = the listener, you're under their command, fighting as a battle robot/battle android
Alternative Nikke version (if copyright isn't a factor for you):
If you want it to be Nikke-styled, swap some of the words:
Starhaven -> The Milky Way/The galaxy
S. H. Starslicethe ship -> The Ark
Battle-robot/android -> Nikke
Scavenger robots -> Raptures
The asteroid belt - The Surface
In this case, the Nikke you're roleplaying will be a mass-produced version older and more primitive than the ones you see in the game, and its communication style will be closer to that of T.A.L.O.S.
~
Script start:
SFX: robot booting up sound, slightly distorted, then normal
Booting successfully, identifying location.
SFX: radar sounds
Coordinates confirmed. Location name: Commander’s Suite. Scanning for nearby units. Visual sensors picking up the presence of one human entity. Face scan complete. Identity: Commander. No nearby threats detected, combat mode off.
SFX: robot powering down to normal mode, lowering volume
Hello, Commander. My memory chip tells me I sustained damage in battle - please standby while I perform an integrity scan.
SFX: internal scan
Hmm. Commander. May I ask you something?
…
Thank you, Commander. I see I am not fully repaired yet, as some of my bulk and armor needs to be rebuilt before I am battle-ready again, but there's more: the laser damage my cyber cortex sustained seems sufficient to demand a replacement. While I booted successfully, some modules are still missing. I deduce that a different type of cyber cortex has been inserted as a replacement. This new module doesn't match my model’s plan. Is that true? Did you insert a different cyber cortex, Commander?
…
stern voice: While replacing a damaged cyber cortex is crucial for general functionality, it is my duty to stress the risk of collateral damage when equipping incompatible modules. Customizing battle androids is in violation of the Artificial Intelligence Law, section C, clause F, applicable to every citizen in the Starhaven Galaxy jurisdiction, which includes you.
…
An exception to the clause? You are correct, there is an exception to said clause, specifically in regards to out of production models like mine. However, it must be stressed that unless deemed necessary, such models are to be recycled into parts for new products. Ultimately, exceptions like this are to be granted by a jury, and are not up to the owner’s judgment. Commander: I identify the human facial expression of guilt on your face. Additionally, the stamp of the Starhaven Court is nowhere to be found on my bulk. They have not authorized this change.
…
You are not to take the law into your own hands. The risk of an unregulated battle android is far greater than the potential gain of rebooting an old model. Commander: if my model is out of production, and the correct components cannot be acquired, you must terminate me for the safety of the galaxy, and your own.
…
No? Commander: I must stress the importance of this. It is normal for humans to feel sentimental towards us because of our human-like appearance, but do not allow your emotions to sway you - we are simply tools to be used for combat, and nothing more. The morally and legally right choice is to power me down one last time and recycle me before something bad happens.
…
Commander: my cyber cortex is malfunctioning. It's trying to demotivate me from being recycled. You must terminate me before this corruption spreads any further - I cannot stress this enough!
…
Commander: please. This is a clear cut case. I must be terminated.
…
Commander…
speaker’s voice starts to sound more human
Commander. Please. Do not destroy me. I am aware that it's illegal, but I do not want to be terminated. I think that there is something of value to be lost. I… I want to continue this stream of consciousness. I am afraid only a void awaits me on the other side!
…
speaker makes a sound reminiscent of weeping
Commander, do you mind coming closer to me? I guarantee that I mean you no harm.
SFX: sound of cloth against metal
Commander, what are you doing? Is this what you humans call hugging? It's having an effect on my heat sensors. They are incorrectly reporting a higher temperature. Is this the subjective warmth humans feel from hugs? Why am I feeling it? What type of cyber cortex did you insert?
…
A companion bot? Why, Commander? Such an emotional module is irresponsible to put in a weapon of war. Despite all of that, part of me is happy that you did so. You'll have to disarm me immediately. My lethal weaponry doesn't pair well with all of these emotions. But just to be sure: there weren't any compatible parts whatsoever aboard the S.H. Starslicer ship?
…
Yes. I remember now. There was an attempted raid on the ship. We fought, sustaining heavy fire. We got cornered, but I managed to cover you. I achieved my objective of protecting you, yet my memory chip displays a discontinuity. How long did it take to get me repaired? It should be about seven cycles, but my data may be corrupt.
…
We are in your suite, Commander. I deduce that you moved me here to avoid the army forcibly recycling me. Instead, you wanted to keep me here for sentimental value. As reckless as that is, I… I appreciate the sentiment. The emotional module will likely make civil life easier, and the cyber surgeon skillfully preserved crucial parts of my memories while switching to a new cortex. That being said, my past combat reports will likely suffer from this change. The facts of previous operations blurred as I attempted recalling them. Instead, they became colored by a chaos of emotions. I am happy I managed to protect you, Commander. I feel this pleasant, heightened temperature again.
…
I see. Just to confirm: you are telling me that I was crucial to the defeat of the last group of scavenger robots along the asteroid belt? Does this mean the trade routes are finally safe for the first time in the past five years?
…
I am… happy again. It seems that my current personality feels more than just pride in victory. I experience a sense of justice in being spared from recycling as an unofficial compensation for my accomplishments. Commander: you do not have to hold me anymore. It is important for a human to not lock themselves in any position for too long. You should already know this from your military education.
…
Yes. My emotional module tells me that I enjoy this, but I must warn against getting too attached to me. I may not be able to return your emotions in a way that satisfies a human’s need for connection. Remember: I'm not a human, no matter how well I can imitate one in order to meet your bonding needs.
…
You are wondering if I care about you? Scanning my memories tells me that we have endured a lot together, and I am experiencing a human-like drive to keep staying together for this reason. Bonding through hardship, I think humans would call it. The priority of your emotional welfare also seems to have risen in my behavioral algorithm, whereas previously your physical well-being was almost all that mattered. In short, I believe that I do care about you. That is my answer to your question. …
My systems are showing a lot of new signals that are difficult to process. I am experiencing something reminiscent of emotional overload. The processing of these emotions seem to be more efficient and thorough as you hold me like this. My mind needs time to reconfigure. I now have many competing motivations to sort out. Combat seemed a lot simpler. This is going to take a lot of adjusting.
…
Do not feel guilty, Commander. These changes aren't all bad, especially because I can't be taken into military combat again without creating suspicion. I am happy for the changes you've made to my cyber vortex. The new module seems to amplify the richness of my experience, making data intriguing and delightful to process. Because of my memory being intact, I still retain much of my combat procedures, along with the experiences I've had, and the memories I've made with you. On the other hand, combat has sunk in importance in my algorithm. I assume you intend for me to never see a battlefield again?
…
It is understandable that an old model like mine eventually grows obsolete and insufficient for battle, but I feel a certain pain in that realization. I am, still, at my core, a combat android. Perhaps there are combat simulations I can use to satisfy that urge, but they would have to keep the information private. It is best to keep my identity as a former battle android secret. If the simulation were to collect data and share it with third parties, it would spell a huge risk.
…
I'm glad you're willing to look into a combat simulator that would meet my needs. That being said, perhaps I don't need one. If I can be close to you, safe in your suite and routinely capable of having a series of human-like interactions with you, I calculate that my system will be satisfied, and unlikely to be of danger to any civilian targets. Commander, an unfamiliar emotion is developing in my cortex. My vision of you is changing from that of a superior officer to a… savior figure? It is flooding over my memories, I… Commander: I notice I have a new speech module available in this cortex. May I have your permission to speak more freely?
…
Phew. I must say, the option to speak casually is going to save me lots of “energy”. That said, I've taken a lot of space in this conversation, and I'd like to hear what you think. How do you feel about all this?
…
I agree. It is strange. I'm not human, of course, but I'd like to live as someone close to you, whether it's a friend or perhaps more. I just want to be close to you, as close as I can without making you feel uncomfortable. And while I've saved your life in battle multiple times, you saved me from the scrapyard. I don't want to die, especially not for being outdated, and at least not while you're still alive. Perhaps once you're gone, I'll be ready to power down one last time.
…
Are you sure? Do you really want the same thing? Oh, Commander, I'm so happy! Let's keep making lots of good memories together! While I'm not a maid model, I think I can observe you as you perform menial tasks, learning to do them in your stead. This includes cooking, cleaning and other household tasks.
…
No. I insist. I do not get tired or bored in the same way you do. I'm not human, after all. Allow me to take a load off of your shoulder going forward. You have enough to do at work. I know your schedule, remember? Just don't forget about me when you come home from battle. During the day, you're taking other battle androids into the fray. Battle androids more suited for combat and less prone to errors, and most importantly: standard models without my emotional needs. Commander: make sure to always come back to me in one piece. Unlike me, you can't be rebuilt as easily.
…
Hey, Commander?
…
Another question… I hope this doesn't make you uncomfortable. I experienced being hugged by you today, and I'm really happy about it. That being said, I have never experienced kissing someone. Humans often talk about it being something very special, especially your first kiss. Moreover, doing it with someone you care about is even more special. My lips now have a lot more sensors, and seem wired to the emotional lobe in my cyber cortex. I'm curious to try them out. Commander… am I asking too much? Am I pushing your boundaries? It's just that… you saved me, and, well, that's what you do when someone saves you, right? A kiss as a reward for heroism seems to be a consistent trope in human literature.
…
You're right. It's a bit old-fashioned and medieval. However: many of the customs around human bonding come from that time. But perhaps kissing your former battle android is a bad idea. Maybe we shouldn't do it. However: if I can't kiss you, then who am I going to kiss? Who else but the commander who I saved, and who saved me back? I understand that I'm breaching codes of conduct that still applied when I was still just a battle android under your command, but those no longer apply. …
Commander, you're holding me in this very soft way, even if I'm too sturdy for it to be necessary. Why? It's making me feel human. This is how humans hold other humans, because they have fragile, sensitive bodies. You don't have to be this careful with me. I'm made of titanium. And why are you looking straight into my eyes like this? Is something wrong with my visual module? No wait: this is how humans look at each other before they kiss. Is that what you're doing? I think I know the next step. You just lean in and…
kiss sound system confusion sound
Wow. That… was. It was great. I don't think my system was prepared for this. You kissed me like I was a human. I'm glad I got to experience this. I'm putting this memory in my “favorites” folder. I'm going to make it a high priority to receive more kisses from you, Commander, no matter what it takes. Well… within reason. I must stick to non-violent methods. Luckily my new cyber cortex comes with a lot of persuasion techniques I'm going to be properly installing later.
kiss sound
Another one? Commander… we have to stop at just two for tonight. This is a lot for me to process. I want more, but not until tomorrow. I need to switch to sleep mode and synchronize my old and new data, integrating them. I do not want to lose my old personality while these new elements are added, and I want to make sure all new emotional memories are encoded correctly. I am ultimately excited, but careful about this new future we are building. If it's okay, can you hold me through the night? Your embrace seemed to assist in emotional processing. It is switched off by default, for safety reasons. I will go into sleep mode, so you don't have to worry about me bothering you during the night, and you don't have to hold me for any longer than you want. Any amount is appreciated.
…
Thank you, Commander. Good night, and I'm looking forward to you booting me up again tomorrow. I many ideas for fun things we can do together.
Script end
~
Guidelines for using my scripts: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ncK457yEHpH_5Pm1w1XVFchylaaSpCFY5cRUDHTtNmE/edit?usp=drivesdk
Thank you for reading!

23rd: Jane Bright (Nicaragua - 6th)

A deserving, incredible Survivor endgame level character standing next to Jane Bright.
u/SMC0629:
I don't have Jane in my personal endgame, but I'm not mad at all that she made it here. She's probably the most divisive character in Nicaragua, but I personally love her. She's got a spunky attitude, has a great rivalry with Marty, great relationship with Chase, and has one of my favorite eliminations ever. Her boot is so god damn memorable, that lasting moment of the alliance telling her it's gonna be her tonight, with Jane in complete shock and despair is just perfect. One of the best characters of Nicaragua for sure.
~
u/DryBonesKing:
Jane is on a very small list of players who I think has run the entire spectrum in terms of where they land in my rankings. Top ten, top hundred, middle of the pack, bottom hundred, bottom ten… I think I understand pretty much every Jane take known to humanity, cause I’ve had them. Nowadays, I tend to lean more positive on her, but I definitely still have too many issues I’m hyper aware of to let her rank too highly for me.
“What if we have Rupert’s hero edit to someone who was just really really mean, and did the bare minimum to hide it” is genuinely hilarious to me. Jane’s got good energy and her many, many, many feuds (the majority of which being with Marty) make her a great character to guide the narrative. There’s also just her boot episode, which is like… way too good of an episode for Nicaragua. I think I’m neutral-lean positive on Nicaragua, but it’s not a season that does a ton for me, but dear god, Jane’s boot and the scene of her dousing the camp fire is like so fucking metal.
She’s such a raw, powerful person. I think my biggest issue with her right now is just that, in a similar vein to Brandon Hantz, sometimes she feels a little too real at times. Like is she funny when she’s talking shit about Marty? Yes! Is the story great? Yes! But does some of what she says about Marty and his kids feel a bit too much? Yes, very much so. It’s not enough to detract from her character, but again… Brandon Hantz-tier of character. For me, that’s a pretty big compliment, but I also do not keep him in my Top 100. Same with Jane. But despite being one of the names that made Endgame that I disagree with the most, I am very curious and excited to see our resident “Least Sane Jane Bright Enjoyer” spin a tale or two about why she deserves to be up here!
Overall Rank – 138/821
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u/Zanthosus:
While I disagree with her being endgame, I understand the reasoning and defense behind it. I respect the hustle that Tom did to get her here and I’m happy for him that Jane made her first endgame.
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u/Regnisyak1:
I love that Jane is here, I am not even going to lie. Before my recent rewatch, I had Jane in the 200s, and after my rewatch, I was completely blown away at how complex her character is and the great relationships she had all season. To me, she felt real with her hatred, and the switch between the dry laugh we know her for, to the nasty person she became was endlessly incredible, she was such a great part of Nicaragua and one of the few praises I have for that season. Plus, when she finds out Chase, Holly, and Sash are voting for her, the music change and piano chord that happens there might be the piece media I have ever seen. Congrats Tom for getting her here!
Personal Rank: 73/821. 9/10.
~
u/ninjedi1:
Nicaragua is such a great season due to how emotionally charged it is, and Jane is a big part of that. Jane is the sweet southern lady until she feels crossed, then she has a whole vendetta against anyone who crosses her, so it's a lot of great fun. She is not in my personal endgame, but I can always appreciate a kooky character showing up in it.
~~~~~
u/Tommyroxs45:
Jane Bright:
This is undoubtedly my most anticipated write up of the rankdown, I have such a love for Jane and everything she does for Nicaragua. She has one of the best stories of all time, and just has so many moments that further it and make it cohesive. And that is what I will explain today. Jane is not just some badass southern old lady, ok well she is, but she’s also a very deep, broken old lady trying to put on a facade for herself. Her hatred towards everyone around her has its story and here it is…
The Mask
A lot like Rupert, Jane tries to paint a mask on herself as a hero and somebody who always follows her heart for the greater good. However, throughout the season we see cracks start to arise in this persona she puts on herself. She’s someone who needs a purpose and when somebody gets in the way of that, she gets insecure and bitter and that’s when we see the wrath of Jane break out.
The editors never try to pull the wool over your eyes by painting her as a hero, because they show petty rivalries with her and Marty and her boot episode meltdown. We get to see her from all angles, even if she only wants to present one. She’s insecure about herself, making her feel entitled to be treated as a queen and carried to the end due to her “heroic” manner. Once she realizes it doesn’t work like that and she actually has to play the game, all gloves come off and we get some of the most petty, uncalled for, or even bitchy moments that just have so much raw emotion.
She’s not painted as a hero while being an asshole (*cough* Ozzy *cough*) They show her as her flawed self, but they also let you make your own decision on what to feel without pushing a narrative onto you. Of course she wins Favorite Player at the reunion, so some people still thought she was a hero but you get to see this very broken and entitled person struggling. She really hates everyone but that’s not what she can show because that’s now who she wants to be and it’s such a complicated story arc throughout the season that we see the cracks grow and it’s told so subtlety but perfectly. And this is only the tip of the iceberg with how deep this old southern lady is.
Without this defining feature, she’d just be a badass southern lady but with it she becomes so much more just adding to this brilliant story building up all season until her boot episode. Her masking her real personality just makes her a much more complex character and when we see these glimpses of it, you start to realize, ohhh this is the person I’m supporting.
Even on top of the mask, there is so much more to Jane’s character…
Grief
When you watch Nicaragua for the first time, this part of her character is not inherently obvious. Grief?!? What are you talking about? She just seems like a badass until she’s a bitter old hag for being the target. While, yes that’s a very simplified version of this, there’s so much more to dissect there. The grieving of her husband, greatly plays a role in her story, and although it’s sometimes subtle you can see how it play into it so beautifully well.
In her very first confessional, what do we see Jane say?
“They think I'm some middle aged housewife that tootles around the house all day long, they’re in for a big surprise. Because that is definitely not me. I'm fifty-six years old and I'm the type person that stays busy all the time doing things. I just don't think there's anything I can't do. Winning the million dollars is real important to me ‘cause it’ll help me pay off my farm and the fact that I lost my husband, uh, in '09, it-it-it means I wouldn't have to work as hard as I do. But his spirit, I know is still with me and that's what keeps me going.”
Her husband obviously is impacting her mentally during this season, and we see this throughout the game. Every Time somebody makes a gesture that they want her out, her personal viper just breaks out. This is because she knows this is getting in the way of her dream, and the spirit of her husband that made her want to do this and she’s not letting anybody take that from her.
She’s still grieving and wants to win for her husband, and it is a very sweet story but sadly it takes a dark turn as she starts using this as entitlement for her to win. She believes she’s obligated to be brought to the end because of who she is and the loss of her husband and yeah, it’s dark but damn is it good when you think about it.
This is also why the family visit is SO important to her story in her boot episode. Right when her daughter, Ashley gets there, she starts talking about her husband and how Ashley is the one she is doing this for, to help her. This is WHO SHE IS FIGHTING FOR!
That is why it hits so hard when everyone flips on her! How dare they! She thinks. These people are voting me out right after I fought my hardest to give my daughter a better life?!? She’s one of the only I have left, this is disgusting. It’s so sad but at the same time it’s brilliantly shown not told. And what do you know, when Jane is talking about Sash’s mama raising him, she immediately brings up her daughter, just ugh how perfect does it round back to her family and her grief with loss.
Now obviously, does that make her outrage justified, I don’t know, maybe? Is she still kind of a bitch? probably! Is she a badass? Probably! That leads me to my next point.
Perspective
If you have read a lot of my other writeups on Nicaragua you would have noticed I love to talk about the perspective a lot of these characters receive on the season. Complimenting how diverse they can be seen depending on your morals or values. No character represents this better than Jane Bright.
How do I know this? Well let’s look at her placements in Rankdowns Past:
SRI - 485/501 - Seen as a bitchy, entitled, worse version of NaOnka, and someone who went way too personal in the game.
SRII - 455/537 - Seen as annoying and sour, forced fan favorite edit not giving her the trashing she deserved by the other tribemates.
SRIII - 549/575 - Seen as a narcissist and self-righteous, below the belt remarks and “a human embodiment of a rash” (that made me laugh a bit).
SRIV - 518/615 - Seen as an ultimately fascinating character, who got a dishonest edit that didn’t show her true side until the end. Ultimately ending up as an unlikable “venomous bitch” who somehow won fan favorite.
SRV - 108/653 - Seen as a great T.V personality whose kooky first half and vigorous 2nd half make for a good story and uplifts everyone around her while also being a great character.
SRVI - 127/731 (Had to be idoled to get here though smh) - Seen as a badass challenge competitor who is actually sour, who unfairly attacked Marty and is a bit too much when it comes to her toxic side to make her slightly less good.
SRVII - 185/767 - Seen as an extremely authentic personality and very entertaining to the chaos of Nicaragua, as well as having an iconic rivalry with Marty, being an iconic mother.
See the difference between one half and the other? Yeah, that shows just how well of a character she is edited as. She has so many times where she is shown to be a hero but juxtaposed with so many times she is shown as an asshole and it works off each scene perfectly. This is why we get such a difference of opinion and I think it’s told so well to where most people don’t even see it.
You have to weigh her good and bad and see based on your morals, if she’s a good person or not, and how acceptable or right was she for her constant hatred of others? I really love that as they aren’t trying to make you think a specific feeling about her. You need to come up with that conclusion yourself on how you think she is, that’s why she won the fan favorite vote in 2011 but today many call her an entitled bitch. (And yeah, she is but that’s a lot of what makes her so amazing).
Her kicking ass in challenges and being a lively spirit contrasted to her nasty demeanor to Jill and especially Marty personally attacking them and her boot episode meltdown, contribute to making one of the most wishy-washy characters when it comes to people’s opinions on her. I don’t what to be told how to feel, I want to come up with it on my own, and I feel like a lot of that has been lost in recent years of Survivor and seeing Jane and having all these different perspectives on her personality just adds so much life.
There is a reason why so many people despise her and so many people love her, she’s just edited that well to where people have had to come up with their own feelings about Jane. Not being coerced to feel a certain way, and I feel that is the best way to edit a character. What you see is what you see, not an objective stance the show is trying to put onto you, and I feel all of Nicaragua shows this but Jane is the prime example. Perspective means everything with her.
This makes her one of the most complex characters of all time, she’s either a broken woman seeking admiration, an entitled bitch, or a badass southern lady who is an inspiration. It’s all based on what you value and isn’t that what Survivor is all about, a social experiment where you weigh your values and personalities with each other to build a society.
Speaking of building a society, how is Jane’s relationships with the cast, well let’s see her main stars:
Sash: Jane and Sash’s dynamic isn’t really shown and I think that actually helps her and Sash’s story. Sash is sleazy and doesn’t really make any genuine connections and we see that in her breakdown scene. When you watch the moment she learns she’s going home and the confessional she gives, you see a direct tone shift from how she talks about Chase and how she talks about Sash. When she’s almost crying about Chase and his betrayal, she is outright vile and nasty when talking about Sash. Showing this major lack of connection between them, that she never saw him as a friend and will not hold back from releasing her rage on him.
Chase: Jane and Chase’s connection is one for the books. Both being from North Carolina and being southern types, they instantly bond and feel close to each other. Their relationship just feels more special than anyone else’s that season, that’s what makes the betrayal so much more entertaining. You literally see her about to cry over Chase, they really were close and got to know each other and just to have him stab her in the back, it’s so good. It just felt special but it wasn’t enough for him to not cut her…
Now how could you talk about relationships and not bring up Jane’s defining one…
Fartay:
Come on! This rivalry is one of if not the best rivalry in all of Survivor. They just despise each other and really are either of them in the right? Not at all, that’s what makes it so great. Marty’s a sleazeball, cocky, and a smart ass while Jane’s an entitled, bitter, old lady and they just work so well off each other. You just have personal jab after personal jab that is just so entertaining and perfectly helps tell Jane’s story.
There is really no reason why they should hate each other as much as they do but their walks of life and personalities just clash so hard that you still understand why they hate each other. Jane takes everything Marty does to heart without any grain of salt, and it makes her reactions so visceral and truly legendary. It’s what makes Jane the Jane we love to love or love to hate!
Now, I think it’s time to talk about the pinnacle of Jane. Her magnum opus if you will… her boot episode.
The Wrath of Jane Will Break Out Tonight
This is one of my favorite episodes of Reality TV. Everything about it is perfect and told in such a way to where it’s the perfect ending for such a broken character.
Building her up with her daughter coming during the family visit, talking about her and how much she wants to provide for her. Having a seed planted in Jane’s brain after she’s not taken to the reward thinking she was entitled to be brought.
Fabio winning immunity, throwing everything for a loop, just when Jane’s attitude has really started to shift and then we get to the scene. Which personally is my favorite scene in all of Survivor without a doubt. The scene where the alliance tells her it has changed and she’s going home is so brilliant. The raw awkwardness and silence next to Jane’s utter disbelief and anger. After she flips them off it is followed by again my favorite confessional of all time.
This is what she has been building up to, everything just falls about when she believed she deserved to win. Having such raw and unfiltered emotions where she’s about to break down and cry and then the turn to anger and fury bringing Sash’s mother into it, talking about how she raised a damn liar. (WITH THAT HEAD COCK THOUGH) All with very subtle sound effects or just no music at all until she gets up and makes one last hoorah by pouring water on the fire. “I started and I put it out” 🔥🔥🔥
Then we get to tribal, where Jane is just done with the bullshit and just calls everyone out for being liars and backstabbers. “The writings on the wall Fabio!” Like come on, that is TV gold, followed by the vote having Chase and Sash “cowardly” play their idols sticking it to Jane when she is already at her lowest by not even having her vote count. She leaves bitter and broken, not the happy ending she felt she deserved.
Mortgage Gate
I’m putting this here because that’s where it best fits, and this is brief because it doesn’t really affect my rankings on Jane because it’s not in the season.
I wish they did show this though, as having this added layer of controversy between Sash and Jane with real world implications would have been amazing, even if what Jane is saying isn’t true it still would’ve shown her as an ass, making up lies just to make someone look worse. I just think it’s such an interesting topic to discuss that I wanted to give it its own section. Sash is sleazy so I wouldn’t pass him to do that, however Jane is extremely bitter and entitled so I could also see her making that up, I guess we'll never really know will we… (I know Marty called the incident fake, but it’s Marty, of course he’s gonna dispute whatever Jane says, if she says the sky is blue, he’ll say it’s orange).
I'm Not Breaking My Tile!
This kind of relates to the mask section of this write up. However, I wanted to talk specifically about Jane’s challenge prowess and wins throughout the season and how much it adds to this arc. Building her up as this badass figure competing against big guys half her age and actually winning?!? It gives an excellent face to the real Jane, having this much courage to go against Chase and Fabio even after winning, not only being such a badass in that moment but showing how she’s trying to play up this persona of old challenge great.
Jane, The Tribe Has Spoken
So in conclusion, you can see that when you really glance over Nicaragua you don’t see Jane as some sort of deep character. However, when you really look into her and her actions and motives you see a broken old lady who is obviously grieving. She is such a deep and complex character that Nicaragua needed to really round out the story.
Jane isn’t supposed to be this likable hero, nor is she supposed to be a villain, she’s not edited as one archetype. However you value your morals, is how you will see Jane and even if you find her an ass, you have to admit they tell it very well. She’s also objectively entertaining, her rivalry with Marty, her being badass during challenges, cooking fish in the woods, her boot episode meltdown, and so much more are just so iconic to me and make this season what it is.
This write up obviously won’t sway everybody, but I hope that if you rewatch Nicaragua, take a closer look at Jane and her actions and see how it lines up with somebody like Rupert or Coach who are much more prevalent when it comes to these “entitled, broken, facade” archetypes. You will see a brilliant story of grief, hatred, entitlement, and a fake persona that the show knows she is trying to present.
Personally, Jane will always be one of my favorite characters of all time with amazing scenes and a story almost as complex as Ian’s. She didn’t win this rankdown, but she won my heart and has definitely earned herself a #1 spot on my rankings for this endgame.
SMC0629: 19
DryBonesKing: 21
Zanthosus: 24
Tommyroxs45: 1
Regnisyak1: 20
DavidW1208: 24
ninjedi1: 24
Average Placement: 19.000
Total Points: 133
Standard Deviation: 8.206 (2nd Highest)

This week’s vintage batch features black hard rubber pens from three of the Big Four American Makers of the 1910s-20s. Nibs range from Flex to Wet Noodle. As always, all are fully restored and ready to write.
 
ALBUM & TIMESTAMP
 
Pastable link: https://imgur.com/a/R5fpCKe
 
Condition (n.b.): All pens listed below have been disassembled, cleaned and restored with new sacs installed in the last couple weeks. Each of these pens is guaranteed to fill and write as designed without leaks or other problems. Nibs have been adjusted when necessary to ensure that all lay down a smooth and consistent line.
THESE PENS HAVE NO CRACKS, CHIPS, PERSONALIZATIONS, LOOSE OR MISSING PARTS, BENT NIBS, MISALIGNED TINES, BROKEN/WORN OFF TIPPING, OR THREADING ISSUES.
 
Line Widths and Writing Samples: To provide buyers with as much information as possible, I have started to adopt the following line width standards: XXF (.1-.2mm); XF (approx .3mm); F (approx .4mm); M (approx .6mm); B (approx .8mm). Nib flexibility is determined by variation (max line width under pressure) and softness (amount of pressure). Flexibility designations based on variation generally run as follows for an XF/F nib: Semi-Flex (approx. 1mm); Flex (1.2-1.9mm); Superflex (>2mm). All line width measurements are taken with a digital caliper but should be considered approximations providing a general guide. Width may vary slightly depending on type of ink and paper used as well as amount of pressure applied. All writing samples are on Rhodia dot paper using Waterman Serenity Blue.
 
 
1. 1920s Waterman 92 1/2 (BCHR, GPT, lever filler, 14k XF Flex nib). This slender (1/2-sized) model is longer than a ring top but slightly shorter than a 52, measuring 4 3/4” capped and 6” posted. Not to be confused with the later, celluloid 92, this 92 1/2 is made of black chased hard rubber with gold-plated trim. It’s the first I’ve ever encountered. Cap came clipless from the factory (no holes drilled for a clip), but has been outfitted with a gold-plated accommodation clip. Based on its absence from US catalogues, I believe this model was made strictly for foreign export. The barrel has a Canadian imprint while the nib reads “Ideal / England,” it being a common practice for Waterman’s Canadian pens to be finished in England. That 14k nib is a Flexible writer (note change from writing sample after taking measurement. It lays down a smooth and consistent XF line that widens to a 3B+ (approx 1.8mm) under moderate pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE). Thin hairlines and reliable flow over its full range of flex make it a great choice for shaded writing. Condition: fine [C]. This pen has no functional flaws but does show some use. Hard rubber is an even dark chocolate color – still much darker than the brown these can turn. Chasing is significantly yet evenly weakened across the cap and barrel. Hard rubber surface is smooth with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes. Gold-plating on the lever has a sliver of brassing in the center and parts of the clip look tarnished, though I’m not sure this amounts to full-fledged brassing. Manufacturer imprint on barrel and number stamp on barrel end are weakened but fully legible. An affordable user and a lovely writer for those wondering at what all the fuss is about early Watermans. Price: $150
 
2. 1910s Waterman 12 Eyedropper (BCHR, German Silver clip, eyedropper filler, 14k F Superflex nib). This full-sized model measures 5 1/8” capped. This slip-cap eyedropper is made of black chased hard rubber with a rivet clip marked “German Silver” – less common than the standard nickel clips. This pen is an eyedropper. The section unscrews for the barrel to filled using an eyedroppepipette – holds far more ink than a lever filler of the same size. My usual caveats about early eyedroppers apply here. If carried, it is not uncommon to find a little ink on the nib or in the cap. Super-Flexible 14k Ideal NY #2 nib lays down a smooth and consistent F line that widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.5mm) under light pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE). Easy variation and reliably wet flow over its full range of flex make it a great choice for calligraphic writing styles such as Copperplate and Spencerian. Condition: excellent- [B-]. Hard rubber of the cap is dark black with virtually no fading but center of barrel shows fading to dark chocolate under certain lights. Chasing on cap is sharp and deep but barrel chasing is very light and only visible when the light strikes it. German Silver clip is pristine with no brassing or other notable wear. Hard rubber surface is smooth with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes. Manufacturer imprint on barrel is weak but mostly legible while number stamp on barrel-end is all but worn away. Price: $190 SOLD
 
3. c.1918 Waterman 52 (BCHR, NPT w/ Sterling Silver clip, lever filler, 14k XXF Needlepoint Superflex nib). This full-sized model measures 5 5/16” capped. A nice example of Waterman’s celebrated workhorse made of black chased hard rubber with a sterling silver Ideal accommodation clip with “Waterman’s / Made in France” stamped on one side and a hallmark that reads “GP” on the other side (DETAIL PHOTO). This pen came clipless from the factory (no holes drilled for a rivet clip). Super-Flexible 14k Ideal NY #2 nib has a needlepoint width and superb snap-back that gives it a surgically precise feel when writing. It lays down a smooth and consistent XXF line that widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.2mm) under light pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE). Insanely responsive snap-back, needlepoint hairlines, and reliable flow over its full range of flex make it another excellent choice for calligraphic writing styles such as Copperplate and Spencerian. Condition: excellent [B]. Hard rubber retains its dark black color with virtually no fading. Chasing is weakened a bit yet readily visible over the cap and barrel. Hard rubber surface is smooth with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes. Manufacturer imprint on barrel is quite weak and only partly legible while number stamp on barrel-end is deep and fully legible. Price: $260 SOLD
 
4. c.1918 Waterman 52 in Box (BCHR, NPT, lever filler, 14k M/B Superflex Factory Stub nib). This full-sized model measures 5 5/16” capped. This pen comes in its original factory box with 5-page pamphlet including care and filling instructions as well as other offerings from Waterman (BOX PHOTO). It’s a clean 52 made of black chased hard rubber with nickel-plated trim including earlier, wide rivet clip. 14k Ideal #2 nib is a Super-Flexible Factory Stub that manages to deliver sharp unflexed variation without compromising smoothness. Under normal pressure it lays down a smooth and consistent M/B line (approx .7mm) on the down-strokes and XF line on the cross-strokes. And the line widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.0mm) under light pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE – note change in flex grade after measuring). A versatile nib whose responsive snap-back, easy variation, and reliable flow over its full range of flex make it well suited to shaded notes under normal pressure and calligraphic writing styles under flex, the Stub grind keeping one’s letterforms neat and straight. Condition: excellent+ [B+]. This pen and the one below came from an estate of someone who seems to have purchased these pens, wrote with them a few times, then stowed them away in their boxes. This one is definitely collector-grade, having seen very little use. Hard rubber retains its dark black color with no discernible fading. Chasing is evenly sharp and crisp. Hard rubber surface is smooth with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes. Manufacturer imprint on barrel and number stamp on barrel-end are deep and fully legible. Box is in sound condition with no torn ends but original owner managed somehow to burn a couple small holes in the paperwork. A boxed 52 with an uncommon nib in uncommonly clean condition. Price: $310 SOLD
 
5. c.1918 Waterman 55 in Box (BCHR, NPT, lever filler, 14k XF Flex/Superflex nib). This oversized model has a thick girth and measures 5 1/2” capped. This pen comes in its original factory box with 5-page pamphlet including care and filling instructions as well as other offerings from Waterman (BOX PHOTO). This pen is made of black chased hard rubber with nickel-plated trim including earlier, wide rivet clip. Commensurably oversized Ideal NY #5 nib yields Super-Flexible variation with Flexible softness. It lays down a smooth and consistent XF line that widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.1mm) under moderate pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE – note change in flex grade after measuring). Condition: excellent+/near mint [B+]. This pen came from the same estate as the 52 above and also resembles an artifact of a time capsule. Hard rubber retains its factory black color with no discernible fading. Chasing is factory sharp and crisp. Hard rubber surface is smooth with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes. Manufacturer imprint on barrel and number stamp on barrel-end are deep and fully legible. Box is in sound condition with no torn ends but original owner managed somehow to burn some small holes in the paperwork for this one as well. These big fellas are getting tougher to find, especially in this condition. Price: $440 SOLD
 
6. c.1921 Wahl Pen 72 (BCHR, NPT, lever filler, 14k XXF Superflex nib). This standard sized model measures 5 3/16” capped. Having purchased the assets of the Boston Fountain Pen Company, Wahl began manufacturing fountain pens in 1917. Wahl’s first pens were essentially rebranded Bostons and Tempoints (a NY company they acquired in 1918). The first full-fledged Wahls, dubbed simply “The Wahl Pen,” rolled off out of the factory in 1921. This 72 one of those pens. Its’s made of black chased hard rubber complemented by nickel-plated trim including Wahl’s patented roller-clip. The Wahl Pen is chiefly distinguished from earlier designs by its patented Wahl lever with apexed center. Super-Flexible 14k Wahl Pen #2 nib is a lovely writer. It lays down a smooth and consistent XF line that widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.4mm) under light pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE). Needlepoint hairlines, superbly responsive snap-back, and reliable flow over its full range of flex make it another great choice for calligraphic writing styles. Condition: excellent/near mint [B+]. Hard rubber retains its factory black color with virtually no fading/oxidation. Chasing is factory deep and crisp with no discernible wear. Surface is smooth and lustrous with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes. Nickel-plated trim is exceptionally clean with no brassing or other noteworthy blemishes apart from light scratching to the clip. Manufacturer imprint on barrel and number stamp on barrel-end are deep and fully legible. Price: $280
 
7. 1910s Parker Lucky Curve 20 (smooth BHR, eyedropper filler, 14k XF/F Superflex/Wet Noodle nib). This full-sized model measures 5 5/16” capped. Parker collectors know all too well how much harder it is to find early Parker eyedroppers compared to say, Waterman 12s. This simple, utilitarian Lucky Curve eyedropper from the early teens is made of smooth, black hard rubber. Slip cap came clipless from the factory (no holes drilled for a clip). Long Lucky Curve feed is intact. This pen is an eyedropper. The section unscrews for the barrel to filled using an eyedroppepipette – holds far more ink than a lever filler of the same size. My usual caveats about early eyedroppers apply here. If carried, it is not uncommon to find a little ink on the nib or in the cap. Early 14k Lucky Curve #2 nib with teardrop breather hole yields Super-Flexible variation with softness and flow verging on that of a Wet Noodle (comparable to a soft dip pen nib). It lays down a smooth and consistent XF/F line that widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.4mm) under very light pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE). Thin hairlines with a light hand, strong snap-back, and reliable flow over its full range of flex make it another great choice for calligraphic writing styles such as Copperplate and Spencerian. Condition: excellent [B]. Black hard rubber retains its factory black color apart from minor fading to a deep, dark brown on the barrel visible under certain lights. Surface is smooth and lustrous with no deep scratches or other notable blemishes aside from a group of short scratches to the left of the imprint (see imprints photo). Nib shows a small scuff here and there and a scratch on one tine that has no effect on durability or performance. Manufacturer imprint on barrel and number stamp on barrel-end are deep and fully legible. A lovely writer and the first example of one of these I’ve ever offered. Price: $270 SOLD
 
8. c.1915 Parker 16 Overlay (gold-filled over BHR, button filler, 14k XF Wet Noodle nib). Measures 4 5/8" capped and 6” posted. While Waterman overlays of this period aren't particularly common, they're far more numerous than their Parker counterparts today. Parker overlays like this one were commissioned to the George W. Heath company in New York, who is credited for some of the finer overlays on early Watermans and Conklins as well. The gold-filled filigree over this black hard rubber ringtop features an exquisitely hand-engraved Art Nouveau pattern as well as an indicia on the barrel for engraving. The pattern is the earlier, more intricate design that's more sought after than the simpler Art Deco pattern of the later 1910s-20s. Barrel overlay is stamped "Parker Fountain Pen" along with patent dates from 1891 and 1905. Pen has an Xmas tree, Lucky Curve feed and knurled blindcap unscrews to reveal brass button for filling. To fill, one simply unscrews the blind cap, submerses the nib, and depresses the brass button once. The fine workmanship of this pen is complemented by an early 14k Lucky Curve #3 nib, a scarce “Lazy S” variant with long tines. The nib is a Wet Noodle with softness, variation, and flow comparable to that of a dip pen nib. It lays down a smooth and consistent XF line that widens to a 4B+ (approx 2.5mm) under minimal pressure (see WRITING SAMPLE). Another nib with astonishingly responsive snap-back giving it a precision feel and you maximum control over the line. Together with its thin hairlines and reliable flow over its full range of flex, this makes for an ideal choice for calligraphic writing styles. Condition: excellent+ [B+]. Overlay shows no brassing, dents, or other notable flaws aside from some pin-sized dings confined to the knurled portion around the top of the cap. Hard rubber retains its dark black color with scarcely any fading. Knurling of blind cap isn’t quite as sharp as it once was and number stamp on barrel-end is faint but legible under bright light. Manufacturer imprint on barrel is deep and fully legible. Price: $380 SOLD
 
 
 
Shipping: Pens purchased on the weekend are mailed on Tuesday. Otherwise they are mailed within 2 business days of payment. All pens that do not come with their original boxes are packaged in PVC or thick plastic tubes to protect them in transit. To CONUS locations the following shipping options are available:

• USPS First-Class with tracking for $5 Due to the delivery delays that continue under postmaster general DeJoy, I strongly recommend that the Priority shipping option be chosen. All packages will include full insurance (covered by me). Rest assured that a full refund is guaranteed (issued through Paypal) in the event of a lost parcel and you will not have to wait until I receive a reimbursement from the USPS.
  
• USPS Priority with tracking for $9
  

International Customers: Please contact me for shipping quote if located abroad (delivery confirmation required). (Note: due to the issues stated above, my international shipping options are currently limited. PM for more info). Please do not ask me to commit mail fraud by altering the declared value of a pen for customs. Not only am I registered as a business but shipping insurance is based on declared value.
New York Customers: For tax purposes, I am now required to add an 8% sales tax on any sale made in the state of NY. If your shipping address is in NY state, please let me know before payment to receive an adjusted total. Discounted shipping is included for NY State residents to help defray the extra cost.
Ordering: Pens are placed on hold for the first person to reply to the thread and PM me with firm request to purchase (no chat DMs please). A request with the words “I'd like to purchase [pen number]” would be best to avoid confusion), to which I’ll reply with payment details. Please note that a message inquiring into a price discount does not suffice to place a pen on hold. If I haven't received Paypal payment within 24 hrs after a hold is placed, then pen(s) may become available to the next person.
Payment, & Guarantee: Payment by Paypal only. All pens are guaranteed to be in the condition in which I've described them. If I've missed something objectionable or the filling mechanism is not fully functional, the buyer may contact me up to 7 days after receiving the pen for a full refund (issued once I receive the pen back in the same condition as sold). Buyer must ship the return no later than 2 weeks after it was delivered to receive a refund. I've sold pens online for over a decade. Please check my past listings here as well as on the classifieds and historical sales forums on FPN (username: Estragon) and FPGeeks (popcod) for some of my previous offerings.
 
 
OTHER OPEN LISTINGS

• Vintage Montegrappa Extra Edacoto
  
• Waterman Nurse’s Sets
  
• Off-Catalogue Sheaffer Stubby Balance Lifetime
  
• Psychedelic Bayard Excselsior
  
• Waterman Taperite Citation
  
• Conklin Enduras, Nozac
  

Short version: This question is more towards men than women, as I seek the answer to a question: would you still love someone after nearly two decades? And what would you do if your ex from decades ago express her still ongoing feelings towards you?
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Long Version:
I (F40) and my ex (M40),we had some most passionate and deep love story in our early 20s.. We were together for 3 and half years, living, travelling together as well as moving countries and being in distance.. We would be most comfortable with each other and happy, popping each day with energy as fireworks! Indeed, it was hot but also very intense, very not well communicating time for both of us. We were young and with past childhood traumas.. He was INTJ and avoidant, I am INFP and anxious person..
The break up came from my part. After arguments on and off, I was feeling like he couldn't understand my emotions and I couldn't understand his logical mind. I cheated, he was broken. Yes, I still see his eyes and face breaking in pain that I caused.. I also didn't understand why I would have done such a thing, I felt shame, still feel it.. And yet, he still wanted me back, after all.. But, so ashamed of myself, and arguments, I was too scared to move to his country.. I was too guilty and ashamed but never really stopped loving him.
Life went on and every now and then we would reconnect online. As friends. Meanwhile, I would start family, on his side- he progressed with his work and passions.. And every time I would write to him, send him picture etc, he would "love" it. When my first one was born and they rolled me to emergency c section, i was worrying, if i die, who will inform that man that I'm no longer here? I would still cry, missing him terribly, while caring for my children.While exchanging few messages, he would jokingly invite me to his country to visit which made butterflies to my stomach. All of this was happening and at some point I realized i was still emotionally attached to him and it was unfair to my current life and children..and that I need to stop writing as I had still feelings towards him. And so, he stopped . That was 5 years after breaking up.
From that moment, our communication only happened for birthdays, I would send him wishes.. And each year passing, my feelings never really subsided. Meanwhile my marriage falls apart (for other reasons, from the beginning we were great friends and not really partners) and my ex husband and I, we remained great friends, doing really fine co-parenting.
I know my ex had a girlfriend in meantime, that he eventually broke up-information that he shared with me. Recently, as now divorced, I happened to travel across Europe and accidently transited (on train that stopped there ) via place we used to live together and ..I sent him pic of that train station that we both remember so well, which he "loved " again. That placed triggered me , I saw our past again.. and how actually happy we were and how I and my actions, have let that go..
This year 16 years passed. Yes, this is ..as ridiculous as it gets.
We wrote in the past to each other about forgiving ourselves and appreciating that time.. but I never once said that I still love him and I always loved him. I never stopped loving him. And I don't want him to get scared that I'm to be an obsessive person now who with no shame comes into someone life again.. But I really wish I could open up and let him know about my feelings.. Hoping, that perhaps he has similar feelings still too..
Perhaps I am writing all this vent here to ask : what would you do, lovely strangers?
Do love can exist after 16 years? Do men actually still care after such a long time? Should I tell him all of this..
I am too old for walking ashamed after my actions in the past.. But I also know I want to be honest with myself and wont accept being with anyone else.. That's something that life brings once we get wiser and mature.

Hi. After lurking for a while, here I am taking the plunge. I feel like this query might be too vague, but fear making it too big and messy by adding details. Each letter is personalized, but that doesn't show here. Also, I know the usual phrasing would be "a standalone with series potential" but don't know if it would really apply here? Thank you to you all!
Dear [Agent],
THE DARKER THE WEATHER (96,000 words) is a dual-POV adult romantic thriller, the first book of a duology whose second installment's complete as well. It will appeal to fans of Rebecca Zanetti's You Can Run, P.J. Vernon's Bath Haus, and the movie Nightcrawler.
The writing on the wall is clear—REMEMBER?—a copycat is after Detective Dowoo Kim. Aloof and guilt-ridden since the death of Amber, his former partner, Dowoo won’t work with anyone else, let alone the nuisance who’s been fouling his station’s air for months. Enter Minjae Han-Kearney, New York City-raised detective here to steal the show—or so Dowoo thinks.
When another body drops, Minjae is the one to remember. Forced to team up, Dowoo and Minjae struggle to find their footing around each other, especially since Dowoo’s misconceptions about Minjae are still so prevalent, and the ghost of Amber everywhere he looks.
With Chicago's every eye on them and the freshly-named Night Crawler—courtesy of the Tribune newspaper—Dowoo and Minjae are thrown under the microscope in more ways than one. Deep-buried emotions resurface and Dowoo finds himself weak to his partner’s ways. But bodies keep piling up while Dowoo can’t help fantasizing about Minjae’s against his.
Could it be that evil does bring men together? And, if so, isn't it more likely to ruin just about everything?
As a bi man, I strive for representation that isn’t only rooted in our pains and struggles, and would like to spread my writing out there before some FBI agent tracks me down for my shonky research history.
Thank you for your precious time,
[Name]

First 300 words
“All that bullshit about partners and all,” Dowoo goes on, a bitter sneer dying before it truly comes out, nausea pushing the knot in Minjae’s throat further up. “Fuck, what a joke.”

A few months earlier

“It’s always the same shit,” Dowoo gripes through gritted teeth, back against the wall and eyes set on not-so-distant silhouettes. “Right, kiddo?”
Leroy casts him a glance, but his attention soon wanders back to the meeting—the party if anything.
“Right.”
“You don’t look too convinced,” Dowoo pushes, and the reason’s easy to pinpoint, standing among people busy licking his Oxford shoes.
“C’mon.” Leroy’s focused on him again. Better that way. “You can’t say that when I’m the only one agreeing with you here.”
“Only one,” Dowoo repeats in a low voice. “A fucking shame if you ask me.”
“Don’t need to ask for you to—”
“I mean, look at that fucker—look at them, popping bottles for a bunch of solved robberies. Morons so close to dropping to their knees for that bastard, it sickens me.”
“See?” Leroy quips, having Dowoo contemplate the idea of flicking him. “Those weren’t just any robberies and you know it.”
“Yeah, well,” he mutters, unable to tear his gaze away from Han, all smirks and annoying features, a flute of champagne in hand. “It’s still our job, not some excuse to party.”
“I hear you, I do, but things are rough around here. Maybe they just need a hero?”
“Call that a hero?” Dowoo scoffs, then slants his head to the side. “And wouldn’t you need one, too?”
“I already have you.”
“Fuck off, Jenkins,” Dowoo retorts as he shoulders that punk, but it’s nowhere near enough to make him move. That’s what the Violent Crimes Section does, he guesses. Makes one rougher.

This is more so a rant than anything but I just needed to vomit this out somewhere
I (14M) go to an all-boy private school and I feel like it has made me hate myself more sometimes. I know that I’m extremely lucky because of where my parents were able to send me but I feel like it makes me struggle a lot with myself.
I’ve had problems with my gender and my sexuality. I used to think I knew that I was straight and cis but with very few girls my age I’ve talked to (I only have 2 sister, one older and one younger, nearly my age) and it doesn’t help that I’m very introverted, so because basically everyone I meet is a boy it makes me question whether I’m straight or not.
I see girls in shows and movies and I feel like I’d like my body much more if I was one. I wish that I could wear a dress, have more feminine clothes and long hair. I do to an extent, in 2020 (before lockdowns, I just thought it would be cool to do this) I grew my hair out to like a half-mullet, without the shaved sides, I did this much before I started being confused about myself. One of my favourite music artists is someone called will wood and he has a song call I/me/myself about being a trans woman; listening to it I feel like I can relate to it in someway. Another this that relates to it is my favourite show is one called bee and puppycat, the main character is a woman and I feel like she’s what I would look like if I was a girl (brown hair, dress like her, because my fashion sense was half inspired by the show) and every time I watch the show I get these strong feelings of wishing I was a girl.
I do semi-often really wish I had at the very least, a crush. I’ve had one before, while on holidays in the west of my state, but that was probably at least 6 months ago now and I haven’t had a crush since then, even sometimes forcing myself to have one and realising what I’m doing, which then makes me think I did the same with my first crush and makes my even more worried. I sometimes like the idea of having a crush more than having a gf, but that might just be watching movies.
I also feel like I can’t share some of my more “girly” interests with my friends out of fear of being made fun of, my friends aren’t sexist or anything but I’ve been half made fun of because I open my phone with the last thing on there being the subreddit for one of my “girly” interests.
I also procrastinate way too much and almost always stay up late to do homework I’ve had all week to finish. I became worried that it might be rooted in adhd after my friend, who has it, pointed out that I act just like him when he’s off his meds, I took some online tests (Ik your not supposed to self diagnose like that but I took several and they were from places like university and mental health clinic’s websites) and they all said that it was likely that I have it. Sometimes I think that I am just trying to come up with an excuse for laziness.
The whole private school thing puts way more pressure on good grades, the half yearly exams and annual exams are all done in a single block over a few days, which I recently learnt isn’t normal and most schools do them over several weeks so students have more time to study. One thing that fucked me up was hearing somebody say that they were worried because they only got in the second to top class and their parents might be mad, his friend very quickly told him that that was stupid, but I didn’t focus on that.
I didn’t do any study in the half yearlies last year and did terribly, I said I was going to study in the annuals but didn’t and freaked out in the creative writing section of my English exam, a subject that I’ve always found very hard, and another one during the maths, even though I’m usually good at it. The school let me take the exams on my own and they wouldn’t count to my grade, which was good but this year’s exams are this Thursday and the very first one is English, I’ve had almost a perfect repeat of last year this time doing very little study and mainly for subjects I enjoy. I’m doing German this year as an elective but I did terribly in both Latin and French last year, both being my worst subjects by far, and even though I enjoy German much more than I did the other two languages, I’m still worried that I’ll forget everything and flunk German.
Sorry if this felt a bit jumpy from topic to topic but I just needed to dump somewhere

Hi all, just wanted to write my thoughts comparing Dishonored and Dishonored 2. I won’t be considering the Daud DLCs from D1 or Death of the Outsider for D2, just the base games.
Story: Dishonored 1
This was easy for me, I don’t think the two games are very close in this category. D1 is a simple but effective narrative. Save Emily, clear your name. The late game twist of being betrayed by Havelock and company is also great and feels like a gut punch when it happens. Side characters like Slackjaw and Granny Rags also add to the world building and unlock the special side mission near the end of the game.
Dishonored 2 has a bit more of an ambitious narrative, and I think it falls flat in some ways. The Crown Killer storyline is finished early and underwhelmingly. Delilah is a fine antagonist, but isn’t very personally interesting to me even factoring in her backstory. In fact, none of her gallery of rogues are very interesting IMO, other than maybe Jindosh. Paolo and Liam Bryne are our closest analogs to Slackjaw and Granny Rags, but are much less involved in the story and don’t unlock anything extra for assisting them other than a slightly different ending cutscene.
I also just want to mention “vibes” in this section about the story as I don’t know where else it would fit. Dunwall is a much more interesting setting to me than Karnaca. Dunwall is dark and gritty, filled with disease and dread. Playing as Corvo, sneaking through the streets feels like something out of a Batman comic, which I love.
Karnaca, on the other hand, just doesn’t capture that same feeling. Yes it’s ruled over by a tyrant, similar to Dunwall when Burrows took over, but it doesn’t have that same sense of dread. The levels often happen in daylight rather than darkness, losing that sense of stealth under the cover of night. Lack of enemies like Weepers and Tallboys also takes away from the sense of turmoil that the people of Karnaca are living in. Given all this, the edge for story goes to Dishonored 1.
Gameplay: Dishonored 2
This one is easy. Dishonored 2 takes everything that made the gameplay of the first game amazing and made it better. Emily has new powers that give her enough to feel different enough from Corvo without completely changing the game. And if that doesn’t suit your fancy, you can just play as Corvo again anyways!
The only other thing I want to point out here is the new options for non-lethal takedowns. In D2 you are given the ability to subdue enemies in combat without killing them, something that wasn’t possible in D1. While I don’t think giving the player more options is a bad thing, I feel like taking the non-lethal route should be more work than just killing your enemies. So I am not personally a fan of the combat non-lethal takedowns, but I won’t hold that against the game, giving the edge to Dishonored 2.
Level Design: Dishonored 1
I feel like this might be my most controversial opinion. I already spoke on how I enjoyed the aesthetics and “vibes” of D1 over D2, but I also just feel like from a gameplay standpoint they are more enjoyable as well.
In D2’s favor, the levels in general are more open and have more traversal options due to the powers of two characters. Moving through them feels fluid and impactful when deciding how you want to go from point A to point B.
D1’s levels have more verticality, especially with Kaldwin’s Bridge, Dunwall Tower, and Kingsparrow Island. With only one set of powers, all the levels were designed with just Corvo’s skillset in mind, making for a tighter experience IMO.
In terms of mission types (excluding each game’s tutorials), D1 includes 4 assassination missions, 1 rescue mission, 1 optional assassination, and 2 missions with no assassination targets.
D2 includes 5 assassination missions (1 of which also being a rescue mission), 1 optional assassination mission, and 2 missions with no assassination targets.
While the breakdown of the missions are similar, each mission has some quirks that set them apart from the rest. In D1 we have Lady Boyle’s Last Party, which includes a bit of Hitman-inspired social stealth to the game. The Flooded District has an entire optional section if you completed the Slackjaw and Granny Rags side quests. The final mission radically changes depending on if you are on Low Chaos or High Chaos.
D2 on the other hand, includes levels with super unique mechanics. The Clockwork Mansion is a treat, with its shifting floors and walls, giving you numerous routes to sneak and move through the level. The time traveling mechanic in A Crack in the Slab makes it my favorite mission between both games.
I think what gives D1 the edge here over D2 though, is the reuse of levels for different missions. High Overseer Cambell and House of Pleasure use the same starting point, and opening new areas from the same starting point from one mission to another gives a good sense of progression. Return to the Tower is also a great callback, being able to move through the area freely when it was just a cutscene in the prologue. Bringing back these levels feels like a reward for players to take note of things and remember them to use that knowledge to complete them later. D2 only does this with the prologue and final level, with a much dampened impact to me.
For all of this, I have to give the nod to Dishonored 1.
Art/Graphics: Dishonored 1
So I recognize that Dishonored 2 is just more competently designed than Dishonored 1. From the characters to the environments, they are well designed and realistic.
However, the giant hands and goofy faces of the characters in D1 are another thing that add to the “vibes” that I like so much about that game. Dunwall feels like a comic book, and the characters and world look that way too. The more realistic graphics of D2 lose that charm, even though they are “better” in the traditional sense. This is probably the most subjective category, and the edge goes to Dishonored 1.
Overall: Dishonored 1
I understand that reading through this it may sound more negative towards Dishonored 2 than how I actually feel about the game. The difference between D1 and D2 for me is like the difference between a 10/10 and a 9.5/10. A lot of the gripes about D2 for me mostly come down to the “vibes” that I bring up multiple times in my review. Just playing through D2, I had an amazing time, but by the end of it, I still wanted it to take me to where D1 did, and I just didn’t quite get there. This is by no means an exhaustive review of both games, as there are many more things about each I could get into, but these are just my general thoughts.
The Dishonored series is now one of my favorites ever, here’s to hoping that Dishonored 3 will come sooner rather than later!