For the purposes of this fanfic scenario assume the following:
Timeline- On the Ring -Emori breaks up with Murphy after 2 yrs on the Ring. Everyone tries to get Murphy out of his slump but only Raven is successful. Both Emori and Murphy move on. Emori sees that Raven and Murphy are good together and that there’s a spark between them so she encourages Raven to go for it. Emori dies on the Ring (she gets sick and there’s no medical equipment, medicine, or doctor to save her). Things slowed down between Raven and Murphy and were tense between, but they eventually got back to where things were before Emori died.
Season 5 -Shaw still has a crush on Raven but it’s one-sided. Raven and Murphy finally get together right around when she and Shaw got together in canon.
Season 6/Season 7 -Once they get to Sanctum, Clarke starts planting seeds that Bellamy should forgive Octavia. Bellamy still leaves her behind in the Sanctum forest after she killed the Children of Gabriel rebels who were withdrawing, but he goes back to get her. He and Diyoza team up to save Octavia and Rose together.
Here’s my question: What if Octavia is able to relate to Shaw when it comes to being an outsider of the group? What if Octavia and Shaw get teamed up during the overthrow of the Primes and she opens up more and more about what led her to becoming Blodreina (the girl under the floor, her mom getting floated, Lincoln dying, Skairipa, Illian dying, the conclave etc)? Octavia works on herself and all that and eventually she and Shaw develop feelings for each other and get together.

Below you will find a weekly reminder of our Rules and partial FAQ. It's definitely a long read, but it's worth your time, especially if you are new to the community, or dropping by as a result of a link you found elsewhere. We periodically revise our rules, this weekly notice will help keep you informed of any changes made.
NOTE: These rules are guidelines. Some moderation discretion is to be expected.

Community Rules

1. Kindness Matters

Advise, don't criticize.

• Post with empathy, thoughtfulness, and constructive commentary rather than judgment. Don't be an asshole.
• Name-calling, slurs (including gender or race based slurs), and insults towards other community members will not be tolerated. Do not attack others for their personally held values, custody situation, marital status, physical distance from stepkids, or economic status; or on the basis of race, sex, sexual orientation, age, religion, or ethnicity.
• No name-calling toward children, including the above-mentioned insults or the term "skids", or terms such as "mini-wife" or "mini-husband."
• Comments advocating spanking or any mention of wanting to harm children are not allowed.
• This is a support sub, not a judgement sub, assholes are not tolerated. Comments with terms used in other subs to pass judgement on assholes will be removed.

2. No Drama

This is a support sub.

• Bickering, nitpicking, and thread derailment will not be tolerated and will be subject to removal at moderator discretion.
• Do not repeatedly badger a poster demanding answers, or refuse to acknowledge an answer that's already been given.
• Do not use sensitive issues from past posts (either from this sub or other subs) to attack another user, as we are all discussing vulnerable topics.
• Crossposting anything from /stepparents to any other subreddit might result in a ban and may result in the original thread being locked. Brigading our sub will result in an immediate ban.

3. Report, Don’t Rant

No backseat modding.

• If you see someone breaking the rules, report the post or comment to the mods rather than engaging them in an argument. Failure to do so may be subject to comment removal at moderator discretion.
• No meta posts complaining about rude comments, DMs, or general sub issues.
• If you think someone is a troll or previously banned user, either use the report function or message the mods to direct their attention to the issue.

4. No Naming & Shaming

No userpings or links.

• Tagging/pinging users or other subreddits in an attempt to bully, harass, or complain will not be tolerated. Do not tag other subs, ever.
• If you want to complain about another subreddit being hostile to stepparents, do not name the subreddit. "Other parenting/advice/judgement subs" will suffice.

5. No Platitudes

Nobody knew what they were getting into.

• Comments like "You knew what you were getting into", "Love them, love their kids!", "They're a package deal!" and "You have to love them like your own!" will be removed.
• Comments suggesting that OP is not cut out for stepparenting will be removed at moderator discretion.
• Comments like "This is just a part of parenting, deal with it!" will be removed at moderator discretion.

6. No Trolling

We have zero tolerance for trolls.

• This is a support sub. Our subscribers do not have the time, nor inclination, to provide support to internet trolls. Posts that are suspected to be trolling attempts will be immediately removed, and the poster banned.
• Concern trolling, devil's advocating, gish-galloping, sealioning, and general asshattery are subject to immediate removal and banning without warning or notice.
• Any attempt to circumvent the ban by creating a new username will be reported to reddit admins and possibly result in account suspension.

7. No Personally Identifiable Information

Use discretion when posting.

• We highly recommend using a separate account for support subs to help prevent being doxxed. Do not post any information that may allow others to figure out your identity.
• Do not post photos of children, or any other photo that could be used to identify you or another user on the sub.
• Any image that contains a name or other identifying information should have the name or identifying information blurred out. This includes drawings, notes, and screenshots.
• Do not link to social media or any articles/blogs where you or another user on the sub is mentioned by name.

8. No More than 2 Posts per 24 hours

Use the daily threads.

• We are not a huge sub, but we are no longer a small sub. If you have multiple grievances to air, use the daily discussion threads instead of multiple posts.

9. Follow Reddiquette

Remember the human.

• Adhere to the same standards of behavior online that you follow in real life.
• Read it in full here.
• Downvoting is reserved for comments that don’t contribute, and shouldn't be used to indicate disagreement.
• If you believe someone is in violation of the subreddit rules, please either use the report function or message the mods to direct their attention to the issue.
• Suspected brigading will be reported to reddit admins.

10. No Porn, Spam, Blogs, or Research Studies/Surveys Without Mod Approval

Just don't.

• This is a SFW subreddit. Posting pornography will result in immediate post removal and permanent ban.
• Advertising on the subreddit (outside of Reddit's own advertising) is not allowed.
• No personal blog posts are allowed without express moderator permission.
• No advertising without prior mod approval.
• No asking for money/posting fundraisers/etc.
• For links to parenting research studies or surveys, please message the mods for permission before posting.

11. Disputes in Modmail Only

Don't argue with the mods on the sub.

• Any issues specifically related to how a mod is moderating should be addressed to the full moderating team via mod mail. This ensures that all mods are aware of any concerns and prevents disintegration of the topic thread at hand.
• This means to do not message or send chat requests to individual mods. All discussion and complaints about mod actions need to be done in mod mail ONLY. Failure to follow this rule can result in an immediate permanent ban.
• Comments in threads asking about mod decisions are subject to removal without notice.

12. Moderator Actions

We aren't kidding.

• Users are expected to know the rules before posting. If you are warned or banned for violating the rules, ignorance is not an excuse.
• Moderators will remove posts and comments and/or lock threads in accordance with the rules above. Typically this happens when threads have gone off-topic in a way that is not productive for the OP, or comments overall have become contentious or disrespectful.
• If a poster continues to argue or to willfully violate these rules, temporary and permanent ban procedures will be followed. Any attempts to avoid or bypass temporary bans will result in a permanent ban. User bans will not be discussed in the sub. Questions posted about user bans are subject to removal and the poster subject to warning/ban procedures. The mod team will not discuss a specific user ban with anyone other than the user involved.
• New accounts are subject to manual approval until they are no longer deemed "new" by the mod team. This helps to weed out trolls and ban evaders.
• We rely on Automoderator to scan for specific words and phrases that are not welcome here and notify the mod team to review the comment or post. This includes slurs of any type and platitudes such as "Love them as your own!"
• The mod team uses a combination of blacklisting and banning when dealing with trolls.
• We employ the use of a bot that automatically bans anyone who comments in subs that have historically harassed our users. If you are picked up by the bot for telling trolls to get fucked, reach out via mod mail and we'll get you sorted out.
• The rules above as well as ban procedures are considered guidelines only; some deviation may be necessary on a case by case basis and/or at the mod team's discretion.

13. Ban Procedure

These actions are at moderator discretion.

• Pornography will result in an automatic permanent ban.
• Extremely egregious content will result in an immediate permanent ban.
• You may receive a 7 or 30 day temporary ban for first and second rule violations, depending upon severity.
• Continued rule violations will result in a permanent ban.
• Willful attempts to avoid or bypass temporary bans will result in a permanent ban.
• We recognize the reddit site-wide rules of using alt names to get around bans and will ban those as well as report them to reddit admins.

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FAQ - About the Rules

What does Kindness Matters mean?

• Shortest version? Don't be an asshole. People come here for support and advice, they do not come here to be yelled at or told they are the reason everything is going sideways. There are ways to point out that someone may want to do some reflection on their own actions and reactions without being an asshole about it.
• The purpose of this subreddit is to provide support and a sense of belonging for struggling stepparents. We aren't here to pass judgement, but rather to offer support, empathy, and constructive commentary. That does not include "hard truths" or "tough love." Stepparents get enough of that in every other subreddit, we're not passing it out here. Be respectful.
• Remember, most people aren't going to come to a sub like this when everything is going great and everyone is getting along. People are coming here when they are down, when they are feeling defeated and stretched to the limit. Kicking someone when they are down is shitty behavior and we don't tolerate it.

What about being kind to the kids?

• "Won't somebody think of the children?" Pearl clutching isn't needed here. If you read the Kindness Matters rule closely, you will see that there is a clause in there about name calling children. We don't allow it. We also don't allow people rolling in telling OP that they feel sorry for their stepkids because OP is feeling overwhelmed and overloaded.
• If anyone is advocating slapping, spanking, or any other form of violence, report the comment immediately. We do not advocate violence towards children of any sort. The mod team does not advocate any sort of physical punishment at any time.
• Venting about behaviors is not the same as insulting the kids. However, if you see a post or comment where kids are being name called or dragged to the point of no return, use the report button. We try to catch the posts and remove them before they hit the sub, but we cannot see every comment without your help. Use the report button to bring problematic comments to our attention. Don't engage in a war of words on our subreddit.

Why is this sub such an echo chamber?

• Not allowing contributors to pile on and tell OP that they are a terrible human being who should never be around children does not equate to being an echo chamber. Many contributors here will offer OP suggestions to help them work through their resentments and frustrations, and the most egregious situations are called out. We simply ask that it be called out with respect.
• If you feel that a post is simply too much for you to handle without following the rules, move on to another post.
• If you believe that a post itself is crossing the rules report it. If the mod team has approved the post, it is because the mod team believes that the OP needs help from the community or needs a moment to vent and move on from their vent. That does not give you license to pile on disrespectfully. Unless it is proven that OP is a bot, assume that OP is a human being with real thoughts and feelings and has posted from a place of vulnerability.

Why can't I tell OP that they are an asshole?

• Because this isn't a judgement sub. We aren't AITA, we don't want to be AITA.
• Comments with terms like YTA, NTA, ESH, NAH will be removed.
• Don't start your posts with INFO either. We generally recognize that as a fishing attempt for more information to pass judgement on OP, and again, we are not a judgment sub.

But OP asked if they were an asshole?!

• Their post somehow got past our automoderator. Just use the report button. We will address it with OP.
• If you've asked if you are an asshole, a-hole, a*hole, a**hole, whatever, don't be surprised if your post is removed without warning. This isn't a judgment sub. If you want judgment, you know where to go.

What is a gendered slur?

• While it seems that everyone understands what racist slurs are, people struggle understanding the concept of gendered slurs. Generally speaking, we are talking about derogatory nouns or verbs that are used to negatively describe people or situations based on gendered terms.
• We've gone back and forth on this a few times, and the truth is, we get it, it's your safe space and you want to be able to vent about BM/BD how you want to vent about them, without us telling you how to vent about them. Fair enough. Vent away. What we are going to stick to here how people are referring to other users and to stepchildren.
• Examples that are not allowed:
  • "My SD is such a little bitch."
  • "She dresses/acts like a slut."
  • "My SS acts like a pussy."
  • "My SS is such a beta male."
  • "You are all fucking whores."
  • "Any dude who is raising some sluts kids is a cuck!"
  • "Little Lord Fauntleroy over here thinking he runs the house!"
  • "You're just the bangnanny, get used to it."
• Don't call users here names, don't call stepchildren names.
• Masking the term with asterisks or other neat little tricks might get you around the bot, but if we see it, we're removing it and quite possibly giving you a time out. The intended word is still there and you deliberately tried to skate the rule.
• As there is not enough space to list every term that is offensive and does not belong, nor every situation in which term or phrase may be allowable in context, this rule is enforced based on moderator discretion.

Seriously? You are the language police now?

• We're here to talk about stepparenting. And we would like for that to happen in a respectful way. Attacking each other doesn't help. Belittling stepchildren draws in trolls who don't understand your frustration, all they see is an evil stepmonster talking shit on the internet about a poor, innocent baby. Yes, even if that "poor, innocent baby" just robbed you blind and set fire to the house on their way out the door. That's just how it goes.
• We are aware that this is a relatively new rule and a lot of older posts and comments contain a lot of problematic language, including some from mods themselves. We are growing and evolving, and rules change as the sub grows and evolves.

What does No Drama really mean?

• Pretty much what it says, do not bring drama from other subs into this sub. Do not engage in vote brigades. Do not try to incite other subscribers to riot in a different sub. Don't follow posters into this sub from other subs to continue to harass them. Do not badger someone or derail threads. Do not harass community members because you don't agree with them. There's enough drama in the daily lives of subscribers, more isn't needed.

What is thread derailment?

• When a comment chain has devolved to the point where all you are doing is arguing back and forth with someone about the same thing over and over again, you have derailed the thread. Also known as bickering. It's what children do. We assume if people are in a stepparent role they are adults. We expect you to act like it.
• If you aren't a stepparent, or in a stepparenting role, consider that perhaps this subreddit isn't for you. If you want to participate, do so with respect. Thread derailment, arguing, bickering, and nitpicking are not allowed.

But what if they didn't answer my question?

• No one has to answer your questions. This is a support sub, not an inquisition. Jumping on a bandwagon with "OP is evading the question" in a 20 comment long chain is the epitome of thread derailment. You'll find more information about trolling below and how this might be considered such.

Why am I being silenced? I'm just asking for a back and forth!

• Thread derailment, badgering, and nitpicking are considered harassment. Continued harassment of either community members or mods will get you banned.

Why can't I look at someone's post history and comment about it?

• No mod in the history of this sub has ever once said post histories are forbidden. What we do frown upon is using someone's post history to attack, belittle, or otherwise harass someone.
• Example Post: "My stepkid's mom really hates me. How can I make this better?"
  • Okay: "Based on the timeline and your post history, it looks like this may have started as an affair. Unfortunately there's going to be outstanding issues for a long time due to that. Try focusing on yourself and how you can move forward without worrying about how someone else feels about you."
  • Not Okay: "Holy shit! You were the OW! What the hell do you expect, homewrecker?!"
• Example Post: "I am completely overloaded and feeling very down about myself."
  • Okay: "In your post history you mentioned that your spouse wasn't really helping around the house. Has that changed at all?"
  • Not Okay: "LOL, you already got the answers you need in your post on relationships. You are stupid for sticking with your lazy spouse."

Why can't we crosspost stuff to other subs?

• We can't stop you from doing so. The problem isn't that something has been crossposted, it's when the community that it's been crossposted to feels the need to come over here and harass OP. When we see that happening, we lock the post and start passing out bans. If you did the crossposting, you'll be banned. If you participated in the brigading, you'll be banned.

What if it's my own post?

• Again, we can't stop you from doing so. We prefer that you don't technically crosspost, but rather just copy and paste your post. Why? Because inevitably the above will happen. Redditors from other subs will follow you back to /stepparents and start attacking users here. It just happens.

What is "brigading"?

• Reddit defines vote manipulation and brigading as follows:
• Using multiple accounts, voting services, or any other software to increase or decrease vote scores.
• Asking people to vote up or down certain posts, either on Reddit itself or through social networks, messaging, etc. for personal gain.
• Forming or joining a group that votes together, either on a specific post, a user's posts, posts from a domain, etc.
• We, along with pretty much every other subreddit that has ever had to deal with this nonsense, further define brigading as this: You saw a post on another sub that linked to our sub either via a link in a comment or a crosspost. It was basically saying something along the lines of "OMG, check out these assholes over on /stepparents! They literally hate all their stepkids!" And then you and your friends come over and start hammering on OP and telling OP how much they suck. Congrats, you have just participated in a brigade.

What is this whole Report, Don't Rant thing about?

• If you see a post or comment that breaks the rules, instead of engaging, report it. When you report it, it sends notification to the mod team. We will act on it where appropriate. Engaging with bad faith users may result in your comments being removed. If you repeatedly do so, you may end up being banned.

What if I see an obvious troll?

• Report it.

What if they are being really mean in comments?

• Report it.

What if they are harassing me in private messages?

• Step 1: Report them to admins. You can report harassment to reddit by using this link or send a DM to reddit admins. Include the link to the DM, admins can see your inbox and providing a direct link is helpful for them to weed out bad actors.
• Step 2: Block the person so they cannot directly contact you again.
• Step 3: Send us a mod mail and let the mod team know. Tell us who they are and what they said, send us a screenshot if you can - admins can see your DMs, mods can't. We'll take action where necessary by banning from the sub if they aren't already banned.

What do you mean by No Naming & Shaming?

• Just as we prefer to not be linked to or crossposted from, we do not allow linking to or calling out other subs by name. If you see something you want to share, say it's a hot post that has hit the front page and a stepparent is being absolutely flayed, just refer to it as "that hot post that hit the front page." If you want to complain about other places in general, "other parenting/advice/judgement subs" will suffice. Absolutely under no circumstances should you link to anywhere else.

I can't link to other subs?

• Do not directly link to another sub. (e.g.: "/insertsubnamehere is ridiculously hostile to stepparents!")
• Do not name other subs. (e.g.: "I won't link to it directly, but insertsubnamehere is ridiculously hostile to stepparents!")
• Do not abbreviate other subs. (e.g.: "I know that ISNH is ridiculously hostile to stepparents!")

I can't ping other users?

• Do not summon another user with a username ping/tag. (e.g.: "insertusernamehere was being an asshole.")
• If you are agreeing with someone, it is okay to link to them. (e.g.: "I agree with insertusernamehere, you need to take a couple of steps back and reflect on this.")

What does No Platitudes mean?

• Sanctimonious, overused clichés that grossly oversimplify the stepparenting experience are neither wanted nor allowed here. We have all heard it a thousand times before, we don't need to hear it again. It's not nearly as insightful and wise as some would like to think.

Why don't you people understand it's a package deal?

• Any comment that suggests that OP should have known what they were getting involved with, or that they needed to understand that the kids were part of some package they needed to accept before signing up for marriage is subject to immediate removal.
• This is one of the most insensitive things you can say to a stepparent. Most stepparents were aware of the children, but they were probably not aware of all of the family dynamics.

Why can't you just love them like they are your own?

• Demanding that a stranger you do not know love children that are not biologically theirs as if they were theirs can be incredibly damaging to someone who is already in a vulnerable situation. Any comment that falls along these lines will be removed.

What do you mean by No Trolling? I was just...

• No means no. No trolling. No pretending to be a stepparent and then whipping out the Greatest Hits Bingo Card of The Worst Stepparent in the History of Stepparents. We see you. We've seen you a thousand times.

What does "concern trolling", "gish-galloping", and "sealioning" have to do with stepparenting? This isn't a debate sub, why are you using debate terms?

• That's absolutely right, this isn't a debate sub. And yet, here we are, day after day, having to defend ourselves against this sort of thing. So, enough. No more. Usage of any of these things will get you banned.

What is "Concern Trolling?"

• A concern troll is someone who disingenuously visits sites of an opposing ideology to disrupt conversation by offering unwanted advice on how to solve problems which do not really exist.
  • Example Post: OP expresses concern that she will feel, and possibly act, differently towards her stepchildren after her husband decides that no, he doesn't want anymore children after all.
  • Example Concern Troll pulled from actual mod mail after their comment was removed: "Possible child abuse claims need to be sorted out well before whatever empathy you believe the OP was looking for."

What is a "Devil's Advocate"?

• "I'm just playing devil's advocate here, but have you considered that maybe BM is just really tired and needs a break, too?" BM has dozens of different mom based subs alone on reddit she can complain on, this sub is for stepparents. The stepparent doesn't need to consider that maybe BM is just really tired and needs a break.

"Gish-galloping?" What does that even mean?

• The Gish Gallop is the fallacious debate tactic of drowning your opponent in a flood of individually-weak arguments in order to prevent rebuttal of the whole argument collection without great effort. The Gish Gallop is a conveyor belt-fed version of the on the spot fallacy, as it's unreasonable for anyone to have a well-composed answer immediately available to every argument present in the Gallop.

And "sealioning?" What's that?

• Sealioning involves jumping into a conversation with endless polite, reasonable questions and demands for answers, usually of entry-level topics far below the actual conversation (e.g. "please prove sexism exists"). This tactic differs little from harassment; instead of discussion, the point is to derail discussion, receive criticism (for their ignorance) so as to look like a victim, or to make someone feel overwhelmed and quit talking.

Who gets to define what is considered asshattery?

• The mod team, of course! If we feel that comments are out of line, are trolling, are leading up to a fight or "just asking questions", we are going to remove them and most likely ban the offender.

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FAQ - Sub Questions

Posting Guidelines for Stepparents

• Body text is required, we suggest you use line breaks between paragraphs as a wall of text is difficult to read. Posts that have only a title are likely to be removed. Instead of using names (even fictitious ones), try to use the sub acronyms. It helps our users to follow along if you use the acronyms and not names.
• Assign a post flair that accurately describes what your post is about and what you are seeking. If you are posting an update from a previous post, include a link to that post.
• Flairs are applied to posts to determine what a person is looking for. When submitting a new post, you should choose a flair that specifies if you are looking for advice, support, etc. The following link flair is available and is color coded with side bar links so that you can search by flair:
  • Advice - For when you are specifically asking for advice or help.
  • Announcement - Mod Use Only, for subreddit announcements.
  • Daily (Formerly TTP) - Mod Use Only, for our daily discussion threads.
  • Discussion - A little advice, a little "How does your family handle this?"
  • JustBMThings - Pretty sure this is self explanatory!
  • Legal - Asking for legal advice? Tag it with this!
  • Miscellany - Just a sort of off topic thing? Use this tag.
  • Resource - Sharing a good resource or asking for one? This is the tag you need!
  • Support - For those days when you want nothing but a good old fashioned cry and some community love.
  • Update - Updating us on something that you posted about previously? Use this one!
  • Vent - We all need to vent sometimes. Respect the tag as a vent. This isn't how OP talks all day every day.
  • Win! - Celebrate those wins with us with this tag!
  • Megathread - Mod Use Only, for large mega threads (typically around major calendar events.)

Posting Guidelines for Bioparents

• Stepparents is a support community for stepparents, by stepparents. As bioparents, you may want to have more insight into how the stepparent in your life feels or thinks. You may have questions on how to ease the transition for your partner. However, please keep in mind that this community was not created for you. It was created for your partner or your ex's partner. If you are seeking support on how to deal with a stepparent, there are other subs more suited for your situation and your post is subject to removal.
• There are some posts from bioparents we will accept:
  • Seeking advice on how to support your partner as they navigate stepparenting
  • Seeking resources to help you better support your partner
  • Seeking resources for your partner
• There are some posts from bioparents we will not accept:
  • Complaints about how the stepparent is too involved in your kids lives
  • Vents about how the stepparent is not involved enough in your kids lives
  • "Cautionary tales" advising stepparents to back off
  • Seeking advice on how to tell the stepparent to back off
  • The Do's and Dont's of Stepparenting
  • How your kid's stepmom is literally The Worst
• Comments from bioparents that are helpful and supportive are welcome and appreciated. Comments from bioparents that are not helpful or supportive are not welcome and subject to removal. There are several other subs that may meet the needs of bioparents better than we can. We recommend /coparenting, /parenting, /parents, /blendedfamilies, and /singleparents as starting points.

Guidelines for Stepkids

• At this time, we do not generally accept posts from stepkids. Comments from stepkids that are helpful and supportive are welcome and appreciated. Comments from stepkids that are not helpful or supportive are not welcome and subject to removal. If you are a stepkid seeking support, we highly recommend /stepkids. It is a very supportive community specifically for stepkids. We also recommend /blendedfamilies as another potential group for support.

What the heck are all these acronyms? I'm confused!

• Check out the Common Acronyms wiki page. We try to keep this updated as new terms are introduced to the sub.

Why aren't my posts or comments showing up?

• New posters and accounts go through a waiting period before their posts will show in the sub and the comments on posts automatically. During the new account approval period the mod team will check posts to be sure you aren't attempting to circumvent a ban with a shiny new account. Please be patient while the timer runs down on your "new" status and the mod team approves your posts and responses.

Why was my comment removed?

• Comments are removed when they do not follow the rules of the sub. These rules are published in several places for your reading pleasure.
• Comments are removed at moderator discretion. In some cases your comment may be removed while another remains up. If you find this to be the case, and you believe the comment to be violating the rules, instead of arguing with mods or demanding they remove the additional comments, just report it.

This comment/post is really offensive! Why is it still up?

• All moderators are volunteers and have busy real lives. Sometimes things get past us. The best thing you can do is report anything you find offensive or inflammatory. It's the quickest and most reliable way of alerting us to an issue.

I've received a hurtful/unwanted PM from someone about my recent post. What should I do?

• If you receive an unwanted/hurtful PM from a name you don't recognize, please report it to Reddit Admins using our handy pre-populated form. Be sure to include the permalink to the message. We've been dealing with a few unhappy folks who like to attack stepparents, and reporting it to the admins is the only way to make it stop.

What are the general moderator guidelines?

• Users are expected to know the rules before posting. If you are warned or banned for violating the rules, ignorance is not an excuse.
• Moderators will remove posts and comments and/or lock threads in accordance with the rules above. Typically this happens when threads have gone off-topic in a way that is not productive for the OP, or comments overall have become contentious or disrespectful.
• If a poster continues to argue or to willfully violate these rules, temporary and permanent ban procedures will be followed. Any attempts to avoid or bypass temporary bans will result in a permanent ban. User bans will not be discussed in the sub. Questions posted about user bans are subject to removal and the poster subject to warning/ban procedures. The mod team will not discuss a specific user ban with anyone other than the user involved.
• New accounts are subject to manual approval until they are no longer deemed "new" by the mod team. This helps to weed out trolls and ban evaders.
• We rely on Automoderator to scan for specific words and phrases that are not welcome here and notify the mod team to review the comment or post. This includes slurs of any type and platitudes such as "Love them as your own!"
• The mod team uses a combination of blacklisting and banning when dealing with trolls.
• We employ the use of a bot that automatically bans anyone who comments in subs that have historically harassed our users. If you are picked up by the bot for telling trolls to get fucked, reach out via mod mail and we'll get you sorted out.
• The rules above as well as ban procedures are considered guidelines only; some deviation may be necessary on a case by case basis and/or at the mod team's discretion.

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I'm thinking of a protolang mixing PIE with Proto-Taqva-miir.
PIE Consonants: m, n, p, b, bʰ, t, d, dʰ, kʲ, gʲ, gʲʰ, k, g, gʰ, kʷ, gʷ, gʷʰ, s, h1, h2, h3, r, l, j, w
Proto-Taqva-miir Consonants: m, n, ɲ, b, t, tʼ, d, c, cʼ, ɟ, k, kʼ, g, q, qʼ, ɢ, ʔ, s, z, ɕ, ʑ, ç, ʝ, x, ɣ, ħ, ʕ, h, r, l, ʎ, j, w
PIE Vowels: e, eː, o, oː(Though a, aː, i, iː, u, uː might've also existed with them.)
Proto-Taqva-miir Vowels: a, aː, i, iː, u, uː
For the consonants, I added the two amounts from each language, then divided by two, meaning that 29 consonants should be the amount for this protolang. Matching them, I could add whatever consonants from each set correspond the most neatly with whatever consonants from the other. PIE's syllable structure was (C)CVC(C), which allowed nasals and liquids in the nucleus alongside the vowels. PTM's structure was (C)V(R), meaning that only nasals and liquids, grouped as resonants, can end syllables and words. In terms of stress, PIE used a pitch accent, while PTM's stress system was the same as Finnish at first, with stress falling on the first syllable all the time, with the modern language's system being the same as Latin, meaning that stress falls on the third-to-last syllable by default, with the second-to-last one being stressed instead as long as it contains a long vowel or is closed.
For syntax, PIE word order is debated. Mixing the two hypotheses could lead to PIE having used a free word order still classified as strictly subject initial. PTM would utilize SOV as the word order, utilizing postpositions derived from verbs. PIE used prepositions, and adjectives before nouns, while PTM's adjectives are also derived from nouns. In terms of grammar, both PIE and PTM were going to share the same grammatical number system: singular, dual, and plural, though PTM, in the end, used singular and plural, which evolved into a singulative/dual/plural system with an inverse marker. I'm considering this mixture using an inverse marker alongside singular, dual, and plural markings.
Regarding the tense systems, PIE is said to have two tenses: past and present. It might've used an auxiliary as an indicator of the future tense. It also used three aspects: imperfective ("present"), perfective ("aorist"), and stative ("perfect"). There were also four moods, or five: indicative, subjunctive, optative, and imperative. An injunctive mood might've also been possible. PTM utilized an unmarked imperfective, a marked perfective via reduplication, and an infinitive. Reduplication plus the [i] vowel was used for the perfective converb, and an -in suffix was used for the imperfective converb, the -su suffix marking the infinitive. The standard copula, derived from "live", and the locative copula, derived from "stand", would be utilized to create a new tense system:

1. Imperfect + Standard Copula = Continuous
2. Perfect + Standard Copula = Past Continuous
3. Imperfect + Locative Copula = Future
4. Perfect + Locative Copula = Future in the Past

(A negative copula was also used.)
PIE only utilized one copula: h1es-. They might've also used others like the following: bʰuh₂-(maybe "grow" and "become"), h2wes-(maybe "live"), h1er-, and (s)teh2-("stand").
Regarding valency-changing operations, PIE is said only to use a causative, while PTM utilizes a mediopassive derived from "take/get" and a causative/commitative derived from "lead". At least that was the original plan. The modern form uses the following operations: detransitive, causative, reflexive, reciprocal, mediopassive (detransitive + Dative), and antipassive (detransitive + Genitive). And via morphology.
And speaking of morphology and synthesis, while Proto-Taqva-miir is somewhat agglutinative, the eventual modern language being fusional, PIE was fusional. At least I think so, though I need better clarity. PIE lacks a dominant order regarding comparatives(superlatives, sublatives, etc.). However, PTM utilized auxiliaries and later a morphological system to indicate everything: comparative, superlative, sublative, intensive, excessive, equative, and contrastive. Unfortunately, there is no paucative marking as far as I'm aware. I'd need to look at the other Conlang Case Study videos. Let me make a list, and I keep the following distinct and antonymous with augmentatives and diminutives, which relate to size descriptions of nouns unrelated to other nouns.
Comparative: ???
Superlative: highest degree
Sublative: lowest degree
Equative: equal value
Contrastive: different value
Intensive: stronger
Excessive: too much of something
???: weaker
Paucative: too few of something
What is supposed to go where the triple question marks are? I'd like to know. Here's a bonus question: Which of these have been reconstructed and are theorized to have existed in Proto-Indo-European?
I'm also thinking of looking into the question words of PIE, and seeing what I should do from there, as Biblaridion is thinking of auxiliary question words like "what+thing", "what+place", "what+person", etc. And I have ideas for the languages it could split into. It's for a hypothetical(either actual or fictional) D&D campaign.

The beautiful, precious, old Basque language is endangered. A lot of people want to learn it but give up after realising how complicated it is. If we want it to remain alive and help people learn it so they can shock our Pre-Indo-European natives, we need to simplify this language!
As an expert in language theory and Basque philology (I took two semesters of general linguistics in college) I suggest the following ideas: - Make the ergative-absolutive alignment go away. It makes things too complicated. - Make suffixes go away. Why do we need learners to learn tons of suffixes??? They’re complicated and make learning harder. - Writing is the beginning and end of any language. There is one written standard, and several spoken dialects. Most dialects are spoken by 4 people anyway. It makes sense to make dialects disappear and adopt one universal standard. Basque speakers can then communicate with each other with messenger pigeons. - Shrink the vocabulary to 333 words. No more than 333 words are necessary to communicate. Gestures can do the rest. Why 333? I like that number. - Scrap the word order rules. Memorising the order of words in a sentence is pure horror, and absolutely innecessary! We can still get the point across without following a specific order. - Simplify verb conjugation. Verbs should never be complicated. We should use the infinitive at all times and use pronouns and adverbs like “today” and “tomorrow” to express verb tenses and inflections. - Simplify the phonetics of the language. There is virtually no difference whatsoever (trust me. I’m a gigapolyglot) between “ts”, “tx” and “tz”. Why waste time with them?
I hope these suggestions are well-received. Erreala ale, irabazi arte, beti egongo gara zurekin!

I’ll always feel guilty for the loss of a potential family, but I desperately want this man off my mind. I don’t even know where to begin. I just have a lot to say and no one who really has the time to listen. I’ll try to stay vague but our social circles don’t really intermingle and I don’t think I know anyone on here in real life. I can barely remember specific moments or map together periods of time cohesively but I’ll try my best. I used bullet points on my notes app to try to organize the important parts. So if it reads weird or blocky, I apologize. Trying to post multiple places for multiple opinions.
I hate to admit that I think I 23/F still love my baby’s father 30/M. That may not even be true. I’m hoping it’s just the drastic hormone changes after having a baby. I don’t want to reconcile or get back together, I just want a genuine opinion from anyone that bothers to read the entire thing or advise from anyone that may have been in a similar situation. It was a very toxic and abusive relationship due to both parties. I toyed with his feelings until it was too late and he would drink and get physical. I was always accusing him of cheating or wanting to cheat because my ex had cheated. Meanwhile I was in fact projecting in a way because I was still messaging said ex. Ex and I were friends before we had dated and were together for 2 years. He had cheated on his other relationships so I should have seen it coming, but he ended up trying to cheat on me and I ended things. I was 19-20 at the time and joined tinder. Experimented a little but ended up hooking up with a guy that had a crush on me in HS. We only hooked up 2-3 times but it started getting weird and I chickened out. Then I got an apartment and a better job and started casually hooking up with the ex again. I think he had a gf at this time but I didn’t ask. At the new job is where I met BD. He started a few weeks after me. I was 20 and he was 28 at the time. We started hanging out after work to smoke. It’s not something I would normally do with just one person and he wasn’t really my type. But the hangouts got longer and more frequent. And I ended up cutting the ex off again. A couple months in, I moved in way too soon because my roommate and I didn’t get along. My ex would still message me occasionally for some reason. He definitely had a gf at this time. Some would be nudes. I didn’t encourage the behavior but I also didn’t discourage it. Bd saw the messages while we were on vacation and was understandably upset. I was upset with myself for responding. I justified it to myself by claiming I was trying to waste his time. In reality he was wasting mine and not suffering in the slightest. There couldn’t have been a worse moment for him to find the messages. The week was supposed to be a huge step in our relationship and I could see how crushed he was. If I were him I would have left me in the hotel states away and gone home that morning. The whole ride home I was sick. I couldn’t imagine how he was feeling, over something I so easily could have avoided and someone I had no interest in romantically or sexually anymore. I believe this is the first time Things got physical but as I said, the timeline is super blurry now. Regardless, if it was the first time, it should’ve been the last. No one should put up with being hit. And No one should feel that their only option is to put their hands on someone. This was when we were finally getting back to his house in our own state. He had picked up a few beers before hand, and that was generally his fuel to either argue or get violent. He had slapped me, choked me and spit in my face, all to which I gave him no reaction. I just sat on the bed silently, or tried to lock myself in the bathroom. He would walk away to smoke a cigarette and immediately come back to fight some more. He told me to pack up my shit but got more pissed off when he came inside to see me packing up my shit. I eventually got a few things packed up and made it to my grandmas’s house. We both calmed down and after a few calls and texts. he wanted to see where I was staying. I picked him up and brought him to my grandma‘s house. (Note: I should probably add that right before we got together. He got in a car accident that totally totaled his car and got a DUI. Since then I had been his ride and always joked That that’s all he kept me around for) We arrived at my grandma’s house, where she had a guestroom ready for me. He just sat on the bed with his head down and cried. He said that it looked like it was so easy for me to move on without him. Looking back, this should’ve been another red flag. All I had was a place to stay after being kicked out. He couldn’t accept that I would land on my feet without him. Most of my belongings were still at his house, and I didn’t want to burden my grandmother any further So I ended up going back with him. At this time I was still apologizing to him for what I had done and how I had made him react. One night after an argument, and a rough day in general. He walked out to grab a case of beer from the gas station and didn’t come back for hours. When I finally went out looking for him, he was at the spot that we had first kissed. There He told me I was holding him back From what he envisioned for his future. It was a lot more drawn out, less cohesive and not so nice (he had been well into his beer by then) but that was the gist of it. One of my biggest fears is being a burden, or anyone holding some secret resentment towards me. Him drinking only let me know how he truly felt and how he wanted to react. I could never put the same effort into the relationship after that. I felt like it was already over and had been over for a long time. A while later, he had seen that my ex reached out again nothing flirtatious this time, but he was still upset, understandably. He got violent again, and I locked myself in the bathroom. He took my keys and my phone and said he was going to go find him. I packed up a few things again and tried to walk over to my dad‘s house. His mission was futile and he ended up finding me walking and brought me back home. The whole night was tense and I didn’t feel safe in the morning before he woke up. I started quietly packing up my things. He woke up and immediately flew into a rage and started dumping my things out onto the ground. I called my mom to help me get out all the big things because I wanted to be all out in one trip. As I was leaving, he was screaming at my mother and I about how much a piece of shit I was, but was right back to begging for me back as soon as I was down the road. This was a reoccurring cycle for us. I’d always keep my phone and keys together in a designated spot in the house so I could get them quickly if I needed to leave. The ex no longer reached out, but we were both still suspicious of one another. Sometimes I would be gone for days sometimes weeks my belongings no longer came back because it didn’t feel like home anymore. It didn’t Feel like a safe or stable place for me. This also made him upset. Every time I would leave we would still text every day. It was an extremely toxic situation. During one period of time that i was gone He had one of our coworkers over for about a week sleeping in my bed with my cats. Throughout our entire relationship and our brakes I never met up with another person. I did leave so I didn’t have the right to be too upset. But He wasted no time having her over for an extended period of time while still begging for me to come back every day. Then I had to coax this information out of him after finding her clothes all over the house. I couldn’t get over the feeling that he had her and others lined up for when I was gone and him wanting me back meant nothing. By this time the dude I had gone to school/hooked up with had started at our job (This would seem like a cruel joke but we were in the same trade and this was one of the only decent jobs in our town.) I guess we had had a silent mutual agreement to keep out past between us because they became friends. Well, After finding out about his coworker, I told him about mine. It didn’t matter that the dates didn’t overlap. He went nutts. I don’t remember exactly how it all went down after that, but I left of course and he ended up going to this 20 year olds apartment. His roommate answered and BD demanded to know where this dude was and ends up slapping the roommate. (I have no idea why I kept going back. Typing this out, I feel so stupid. He was clearly fucking crazy and my brain was telling me to get the fuck out.) I was already suspicious of him because of how we both acted before we got together, but all of this just made it so much worse. I wanted to know why he felt the need to intimidate me into staying with him and calling it “crazy love” when he could so easily move on and leave me alone. (Why did infidelity have to be the dealbreaker and not everything else?) Bringing up my suspicions or insecurities, just made him defensive and occasionally violent. I never got any reassurance and my reasons for staying were few and far between. Then we found out I was pregnant. We found out when I was about seven weeks pregnant. The last time we had gotten into a physical fight I had been about 4 to 5 weeks pregnant. I was scared. Bd seemed happy. He said he wanted to be a family. Over the next few weeks, I was having extremely bad morning sickness I was in and out of the hospital on an IV for fluids and couldn’t leave our bedroom or bathroom. I still had to drive him to and from work which was only about 30 min round trip but I’d always have to stop on the side of the road to puke. (Note: There were five cats living in this house that I was Feeding and cleaning up after. We inherited two from the homeowner and three were ours) The house started to smell because I could no longer keep up with the cats, and this just made my morning sickness even worse. On top of this, I was having extremely bad back pain that I thought was just a symptom of pregnancy. After one of my trips to the hospital for fluids, they informed me that I had a UTI. I was about 10-11 weeks pregnant by then. I tried to tell him that I needed help with the house and that it was making me miserable. He just expressed that I would be complaining regardless. Whether it be about him spending enough time with me, helping clean, or working. This wasn’t even the worst of the treatment that I had received, but being pregnant, This was the last straw. I knew I couldn’t bring a baby into the abusive cycle that we were putting each other through. I don’t remember exactly how it happened. At this point I was looking for any reason to leave. But it happened and again I started packing up my shit. This time he barely put up a fight. He tried to dump my stuff out on the floor once, but I said if he tried to put his hands on me, I’d call the police this time. He sat in the kitchen on his phone until I was done packing. As I was carrying my belongings out to my car still weak and sick, we were screaming back-and-forth about how much we hated each other, and how I would never give him the chance to put his hands on my child. He shouted that he didn’t think the baby was even his, to which I replied, “Good, then I’ll never have to fight you in court”. That was our last face to face interaction. I filed for a civil protection order. It’s been about a year and since then, he has been claiming to his coworkers and his mother that my ex is the father. His mother doesn’t seem to believe him as she had kept in contact with me throughout my pregnancy, and since the baby’s been born. She requests a paternity test just to be sure, but I have no doubts that the baby is his. I am almost positive that he knows the baby is his too. His claims of me cheating are only his way of justifying me leaving and making it my fault. I sent her the information to reach out for a paternity test, but she hasn’t shown me any indication that he wants to be part of the baby’s life. Any time she brings up the situation to him, he gets angry with her and hangs up. I don’t know what’s going on in his life and I don’t want to. I’d only obsess over it and make myself upset if I did. I assume he’s living his dream and chasing his goals without me there to hold him back, especially with a child. Even after typing all this out and rereading and editing, I still miss him. I shouldn’t. I can’t tell if it’s the cycle calling me back or the drastic changes in hormones. I can’t even think of a reason that I should miss him. I don’t even think I miss him, just his presence or energy? It’s so hard to explain and I don’t want to feel this way. I have nightmares about trying to get away from him and out of the house but try to force myself back into the same dream just so I can see him. Is this normal? Do any other moms feel this way? Only attracted to the baby’s father even while split up? I have no sex drive when I used to be a fiend. I heard this can be a side-effect of the drastic hormone changes, but I don’t even feel an attraction anymore. Unless they’re a very specific type (My BD). I have no desire to move on or find a romantic connection. I do more harm than good and I’d rather focus on being a mom (which I’m loving aside from this issue).I know there’s no way of going back even if I wanted to. The damage has been more than done. I just want to make moving on easier and forget him. Do I just have to wait?

She plays Duolingo but it gave her too many tenses like "have + read", "I was speaking" etc.
I told her better for her is learning present simple first and then what next?
Generally future simple is easy because we add "will" and "won't".
I guess past simple is used by people more than future simple so past simple next after present simple?
Should she learn verbs like "cook-ed", "start-ed" etc and then "wrote, ran, made"?
I think second ones are harder to remember because they don't have "ed"
I know it's obvious but maybe you have a better way to learn it.

My suggestions are based on what I learned from my wife's experience with Duolingo. As I have mentioned here previously, she finished the course and still couldn't understand natives talking, nor could she hold a conversation in real time. She could understand just about anything she read, and if given enough time, she could express herself in slow Spanish. But that doesn't cut it in the real world.
So, I'm five months into my own Spanish journey. Based on what I've learned from her, here are my suggestions...

1. If doing Duolingo, don't just passively and slowly click the words to make the sentences. As soon as you see the sentence in English, say it in Spanish...and THEN hunt for the words in the jumble or type them (whatever is asked of you). If you finish Duolingo thinking you have unlimited time to complete each task, you'll carry that over into real-life conversations. You need to train yourself to instantly output Spanish
   
2. Speaking of real-life conversations, my wife couldn't comprehend native speakers because she never listened to them during her time using the app. This is where I think the "comprehensible input" people are nailing it. I've been doing Dreaming Spanish (along with a bit of Duolingo) for 5 months, and I can already follow just about any intermediate Spanish podcast. I can also follow (with 75-90% comprehension) a high percentage of native speakers in Instagram and YouTube videos. Over 75% of my Spanish time is spent on comprehensible input.
   
3. When you get further in the app, get involved in a language exchange or pay for an online tutor. You'll only learn to talk if you actually talk. I'm going to hire a tutor for my wife for her birthday. I expect her to make fast progress since she already knows a ton of vocabulary and is pretty capable with verb tenses.
   

We used to watch Marvel movies in timeline order a while back and I wanted to try to get that going again so I could spend time with her and better our admitly tense relationship. When I brought this up she agreed that she wanted to do that as well. Then she just, watches them without asking if I wanted to join.

Hey, everyone. I’m looking for feedback on my edited first draft. I’d love for constructive criticism on plot inconsistencies, character arcs, and pacing.
This story contains a smidge of Tagalog (Filipino) mainly through dialogue. And there’s very little Mandarin too. There’s translations within the prose, of course.
Genres: YA, Contemporary
Tags: Filipino MC, Chinese-American MC, Dual POV, very light F/F romance, slow burn, psychological/mental health, secrets/mystery, magical elements, Autumn/Fall season, written in Present-tense
Content warnings: Death (Suicide), Grief, Mental Illness (Depression), Memory loss, brief thoughts of Self-harm, brief mention of Bullying, Swearing
Blurb: 17-year-old Clover gets into an accident and wakes up from a coma believing she’s a Streyarose, a fantastical being that hails from a celestial planet, and disguised as a human to complete a mission on earth. She meets 16-year-old Ruby, expelled from high school and forced to live with her grandparents in her childhood hometown full of bad memories. They form an unlikely friendship, later finding that they have more of a connection than they realize—a heartbreaking secret that will unlock tragic truths and memories.
🔗 Here’s the first chapter.
Timeline: I’d like to go over feedback after two weeks.
Swap: Available. I enjoy YA, Contemporary, and Magical Realism. I’m not fit for SCI-FI, Historical Fiction, or High Fantasy.
A lil heads up: I have a questionnaire that I’ll send to you along with the manuscript if you decide to read my book!

These are my own thoughts so keep your plasma rifles and Skynet gut destruction to a minimum OK?
I think the best way to bring the Terminator series back into film going audience hands and the long term fans who stuck by thick and thin is to focus on the elements that made the original film great.
Make an atmospheric, tense, constant sense of dread and paranoia, greusome, violent horror noir focused story set in the universe of the first two
John Connor should be left in the franchise as the leader of the resistance, but shouldn't be the main character in the story. He should be shown in story flashbacks when they focus on the future war parts
The movie should focus on an original character in the timeline that's important to the Skynet war or Tech-Com resistance organization. This would be a great way to pull in new audiences and long fans.
The Terminator movie should return to the basis of a single Terminator, no protector robot this time but a normal person trying to protect themselves from the Infiltration unit trying to assassinate them in the past. This would prove great for horror vibes
They could show the story be set around a police officer, or normal civilian who's just living their life but get caught up in a murder investigation as a T800 unit is sent back to kill them because they are a lieutenant or perhaps a Skynet code decipher in the future and they are unaware about the mission.
They could have the machine be simple and return to what made Arnold so terrifying in the original film. He needs to be brutal, violent, an unstoppable force that just keeps coming. The kills need to have a sense of uncomfortable horror and danger for the audience to witness. Make the machine more human like and not a body builder to blend in more.
The second film and the subsequent sequels would just focus on the action elements which killed off all of the mystery, suspense, horror, greusome and creeping atmosphere of the original movie which is something I feel the franchise lacks of nowadays.

PC
Reddit Account: WingedRabbits
Discord Tag: professorpisstake
Name and House: Valarr Scales
Age: 62
Cultural Group: Valyrian (Westerosi)
Appearance: Valarr is a withered, frail, old man with a permanent scowl on his face - despite this or perhaps because of this, he is quite an imposing character. His hair is white and wispy, and falls just down to his shoulders where it meets his well-maintained beard. A jagged scar runs along the right-side of his face, starting at his lip and twisting up to his ear. Valarr walks with a limp, and is seemingly always clutching his silver cane.
Trait: Numerate
Skill(s): Architect, Avaricious (e), scrutinous, administrator
Talent(s): Haggling, Bargaining, Familial Matters
Negative Trait(s): N/A
Starting Title(s): Lord of the Scales, Lord of house Scales.
Starting Location: Opening
Alternate Characters: Aurion Scales
AC
Name and House: Ser Aurion Scales
Age: 30
Cultural Group: Valyrian (Westerosi)
Appearance: In contrast to his father, Aurion is a strapping, elegant man. He has wonderful, straight, brown hair which droops down to his shoulders, and a fine beard. He wears bright, fanciful clothing - which makes him stand out like a sore thumb against his father and his father's retinue, who tend to wear dull, dark clothes. Aurion has a well-mannered stride.
Trait: Just
Skill(s): Vanguard, Two-Handed Weapons, Armored
Talent(s): Public Speaking, Fashion, Charm
Negative Trait(s): N/A
Starting Title(s): Heir to The Scales,
Starting Location: Opening Event
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bio-Timeline

37 BC - Valarr is born as the first child of Lord Aurane Scales. He is born a sickly child. Maester Corwyn begins taking care of Valarr.
36 BC - Valarr is declared healthy by Maester Corwyn. He is expected to grow into a healthy young child. A daughter is born to Lord Aurane Scales. She is named Helicent, after her grandmother. She is said to have cried for hours after her birth.
32 BC - Another son is born to Lord Aurane. He is named Edric. Young Valarr begins his tutelage under his father. Luthor Scales is born to Valarr’s uncle, Lucerys ‘The Wise’. Luthor weighed ten pounds at birth.
31 BC - Pirates assault The Scales in a surprise raid. Although they are repelled, the damage they dealt will be felt for years to come. Valarr is given a cat for his nameday - he affectionately names it “Balerion”, after the dragon which he often saw soaring above.
29 BC - Helicent becomes subject to relentless bullying by some older kids in court. Valarr witnesses this, and starts teaching Helicent how to fight back using techniques he had learned from his father and his other tutors. The siblings become friends. Johanna Scales is born to Lucerys ‘The Wise’.
27 BC - Following his tenth nameday, Valarr is sent to study in Dragonstone for a year. He grows to miss his siblings greatly, though. Valaena Targaryen allows Valarr to hold and play with the newborn Aegon on occasion, which helps him deal with his homesickness when his parents did not visit. Edric begins his tutelage under Lord Aurane.
26 BC - Valarr returns home from his year-long stay in Dragonstone. Valarr and Edric struggle to get along - but find common ground in their hatred of their oafish cousin Luthor.
24 BC - Aurane begins teaching Valarr how to command and lead armies, and how to manage a domain. Valarr shows unusual aptitude with the logistics and management of a fiefdom.
22 BC - Edric begins shirking his studies to spend time at the local port. Valarr and Luthor’s rivalry intensifies.
21 BC - Valarr celebrates his 16th nameday, and the beginning of his adult life. His studies under his father conclude. Valarr struggles with his feelings for his sister. They share their first kiss. Aurane announces that Helicent is to be betrothed to Maekar Belaerys. Valarr is upset.
20 BC - Helicent celebrates her 16th nameday, and is wed to Maekar Belaerys. Valarr leaves The Scales for Dragonstone, to serve in the court of the Targaryens.
16 BC - Edric and Luthor both celebrate their 16th nameday. Edric takes the first chance he gets to sign on as a sailor with a merchant ship, right under his father’s nose. Lord Aurane is infuriated. Luthor undergoes a growth-spurt, and by the end of it - he is as tall and broad as men twice his age.
14 BC - Luthor begins frequenting brothels on Dragonstone and brings home his first bastard. The child is named Aerion. Valarr does not enjoy having to explain to Lord Targaryen that Luthor’s choice of name was meant as a compliment, rather than an insult.
13 BC - Lucerys ‘The Wise’ falls ill with consumption. He is dead within the year. There is a suspicious increase in the number of silver-haired babies born on Dragonstone this year.
10 BC - Luthor brings home a second bastard child, and names this one Aegon. Valarr returns to The Scales after spending the last few years serving in the court of the Targaryens. Luthor and Valarr begin to bicker constantly. Lord Aurane falls ill. Valarr begins courting Calla Blackberry.
8 BC - Edric returns home after receiving word of his father’s condition - with him, he brings a Tyroshi woman named Rohanne and a young child. He explains that he and Rohanne fell in love during his time in Essos, and wed. The child is their son, Elyas. Valarr is just glad to see his brother again.
7 BC - Lord Aurane dies clutching at his heart during a feast. Valarr becomes the new Lord of House Scales, and is eager to make his father proud. New construction efforts within the Scales begin immediately.
6 BC - Lord Valarr marries Calla Blackberry. He commissions a suit of plate-armour - decorated with ornamental scales across the breastplate and base. Calla becomes pregnant.
5 BC - Aurion Scales is born to Valarr and Calla.
2 BC - Triston Scales is born to Valarr and Calla.
2 BC - Aegon Targaryen declares his intention to unite the Seven Kingdoms. Valarr Scales is among one of his first and most ardent supporters. When Aegon rallied his banners, Valarr was the first to arrive. When Aegon landed in the Blackwater Bay, Valarr was one of the first to feel the sand under his boots. Alongside Valarr was his brother Edric and cousin Luthor. The trio were unstoppable on the battlefield. Valarr and his men participate in the Battle of the Reeds and Wailing Willows.
1 BC - The Last Storm. Valarr, his brother, and his cousin all fought on the front line. Valarr commanded his men from atop his horse. They withstood the Storm King’s initial assaults, but upon his fourth charge the line broke. Argilac’s spearmen surrounded his position and picked off his retinue - eventually, they even got Valarr. They butchered his horse and pierced his hip. Valarr fell from his saddle, and then his horse fell on him - or at least, on his right leg. He eventually managed to free himself, only to be met with a hammer directly to his face. He was lucky the padding beneath his helmet took most of the impact. He was found the following morning by healers, and carried back to camp for treatment. Many of his bones had been broken, and much of the skin on the right side of his face was only hanging on by threads. Despite this, he made a miraculous recovery after a short battle with infection. However, his leg never healed right - and it seemed unlikely he would ever be able to fight again because of it.
1 BC - The Field of Fire. After Orys Baratheon’s successful campaign in the Stormlands, Valarr and his forces were reassigned to fight once more under Aegon’s banner - this time in his conquest of the Reach. Valarr did not participate directly in the Field of Fire, rather he was put in charge of managing the logistics for Aegon’s army. He was to make sure Aegon’s men were fed and supplied for the duration of his campaign in the Reach, and Valarr excelled at this job. When the day came that Aegon’s forces met the combined forces of the Kingdoms of the Rock and the Reach, Valarr took position as one of Aegon’s commanders. Although he was not in any chief leadership position for the battle, he played a role in devising the crescent formation that would keep Aegon’s men from being surrounded. Edric and Luthor again fought on the frontlines.
1 AC - Valarr is present for Aegon’s coronation. Valarr returns home to the Scales with Edric and Luthor in tow.
2 AC - Valarr commissions a Qohorik blacksmith to forge a cane to assist with walking. The cane is to be made half of lightweight silver and half of polished black wood, and the silver is to be engraved in the style of scales, with the handle of the cane to be fashioned in the style of a dragon’s head. The commission nearly halves Valarr’s treasury. Edric is given the task of staying in Qohor until the cane is completed, and then returning it to Valarr.
3 AC - Valarr’s cane is finished. Edric returns with it in haste. Luthor sires another bastard - Brea ‘Waters’.
5 AC - Rohanne Quaynis gives birth to a daughter. Edric names her Rohanne, after her mother. Luthor and his sister Johanna begin an affair. Valarr begins renovations of his holdfast - with the goal of elevating his home into a proper Keep. Aerion ‘Waters’ becomes known as a formidable warrior.
7 AC - Several pregnancies coincide this year, causing the House to grow quite a bit. Valarr and Calla introduce their daughter Cyrenna Scales to the world. Edric and his wife have a son, who they name ‘Aurane’, after Edric’s father. Luthor and Johanna have a bastard of incest together. They might have been able to keep their affair a secret, but Johanna dies during childbirth and Luthor takes open responsibility for the child. She is named Rhaenys. Luthor begins to spiral into his vices, namely drink and food. Aegon ‘Waters’ leaves The Scales to search for work as a mercenary.
7 AC - Valarr attends Aegon’s feast in King’s Landing. He reconnects with his King, and they share many stories of their childhood and their younger years, and then stories of their time during the Conquest. Valarr leaves to handle some issues with his family. By the time he returns, Aegon has already been wounded. After a few tense days of waiting, Aegon’s death is made public. Valarr mourns the loss of his King, and his friend.
8 AC - Luthor finally marries after spending years as a bachelor. He has a daughter with his new wife. He names his first trueborn child ‘Saera’.
10 AC - Aurion Scales - son of Valarr - reaches his tenth nameday. He is sent to live in the court of Dragonstone for a year. Triston grows resentful of his brother. Luthor has a son, who he names Morgan.
11 AC - Aurion returns from Dragonstone. Luthor has another daughter, who he names Falyse. Elyas Scales - son of Edric - marries.
12 AC - Triston has a bastard son with a servant girl. He names him Oswyn. Elyas has twins, who he names Lucerys and Casella.
14 AC - Edric arranges a betrothal for his daughter Rohanne, but she refuses to marry. Rohanne hides on a merchant ship as a stowaway. Rohanne winds up in Pentos and begins living as a beggar.
15 AC - Many Scales attend Orys’ Kingswood hunt, including Edric, Aurion, and Elyas. Elyas is struck down during the Kingswood Catastrophe by brigands while protecting his mother - who is also slain. Edric is distraught over the death of both his son and his beloved wife. Aurion displays great bravery during the event, and manages to free a group of hostages on his own while slaying a small band of brigands. For his bravery and courage, Aurion is knighted.
16 AC - Edric boards a ship bound for King’s Landing. During the voyage, he is reported to have flung himself overboard in an apparent act of suicide. His body could not be found. Valarr is very upset to have lost his brother. Valarr makes up with his cousin Luthor.
18 AC - Aurion leaves Dragonstone for the mainland, and begins traveling across Westeros as a hedge-knight - focusing on fighting in tourneys, and helping anyone who needs it. Rohanne joins up with the Company of the Rose after years of begging and stealing to survive.
20 AC - Triston Scales begins aiding his father with his duties, as Valarr becomes increasingly frail. Brea ‘Waters’ leaves The Scales on a ship to Storm’s End. She bounces between port towns until she winds up Tyrosh, where she joins up with a band of pirates.
21 AC - Aerion ‘Waters’ becomes the Master-At-Arms of The Scales, replacing ‘old’ Ser Clayton.
22 AC - Oswyn ‘Waters’ becomes entranced with books and legends and history. He is never seen without a book in his hand.
23 AC - Brea ‘Waters’ manages to become the captain of her own vessel, ‘The Black Wyrm’. Her crew is a nuisance to many traders along the coasts of the Free Cities.
24 AC - Valarr is discontent with the state of House Scales, and with how little recognition they have received despite their contributions to their liege. He drafts plans to forge alliances with as many houses as he can, and to build up the prestige and power of his house.
25 AC - Present. Valarr, Aurion, Luthor and a few other members of House Scales attend the festivities in The Kingswood.
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
House Scales in 25 AC

Abkhaz elders from the Aibga, 1860s.
Abkhazians from the village of Pskhu, 1860s. Photo by an unknown photographer
In the same area described above, but moving away from the seashore and approaching the mountain gorges, three Abkhazian societies inhabit: Akhchipsou, Aibga, and Pskhu, which some classify as part of the Jigetian***(Sadzs)*** group, while others consider them a distinct branch called Medozuyi or Medoveyevtsi. The Akhchipsou live in the upper reaches of the Pskhu and Mzymta rivers. Did not bow to anyone, they are known for their warlike spirit and ferocity. They maintained close ties with their neighbors, the Ubykhs, and participated in their ventures. The high mountains and impregnable gorges occupied by the Akhchipsou, along with their inaccessibility from the sea, presented significant difficulties for subduing this society, which at one time was the most troublesome of all the Abkhazians for Russia.
The Aibga live between the Akhchipsou and Pskhu societies, in the upper reaches of the Khashuapse River; this is the smallest of the three Medoveyevtsi societies, primarily engaged in theft and robbery in Abkhazia and among the Circassians who lived on the northern slope of the Caucasus range. The Pskhu live in the upper reaches of the Bzyb and Mezhita rivers. This society shares with all the Medoveyevtsi a propensity for predation and the capture of prisoners for later sale to Turkish merchants. In 1840, they submitted to Russia and handed over hostages, but in the last war with the Circassians, they took part against the Russians. The population of all the Medoveyevtsi, before the resettlement of the Circassians to Turkey, amounted to approximately 7-8 thousand souls.
E.P. Kovalevsky. Essays on the Ethnography of the Caucasus. 1867.
Abadzes, inhabiting the eastern shore of the Black Sea from Bzyb to Sochi, are divided into many societies, independent of each other, free, and not subject to any authority. In each society, there is one or two families who, due to the antiquity of their lineage, wealth, and numerous members, enjoy general respect and inviolability based on the number of avengers they can mobilize in case of an offense against one of their members. There is no popular enmity between these societies, which does not prevent individual families from engaging in feuds that often disturb general harmony.
There are as many societies as there are villages, and they are as follows:

1. Akhchipsou, at the upper reaches of the Mzymta River... situated on slopes and small clearings at the foot of mountains forming the gorges of the mentioned rivers. The houses (of which there are about 200) are scattered over a distance of almost 5 versts, each family having a garden and a small field sown with corn and gomi near their dwelling. Communication within the village is extremely difficult, consisting of narrow, rocky paths often blocked by huge masses of stone... steeply disappearing over the precipitous bank of the Mzymta, across which there are 2 suspension bridges, with fords for crossing horses nearby. The dominant family here is the Marshanias, extremely numerous, the most senior and respected being Dudarukva Bagarkan-ipa Marshania.
2. Aibga, at the upper reaches of the Psou River, somewhat smaller than Akhchipsou and containing up to 180 families, also settled by the Marshanias; in addition to them, there are the uzdens Vakhokh, Tlabog, and Kota, who have some influence among the people.
3. Chuzhgucha, on the Chuzhipsy River, a tributary of the Mzymta; its population extends to 100 families, who have built their dwellings on the forested heights along this river. They are poorer than the inhabitants of Akhchipsou and Aibga, due to the lack of space, which does not offer the resources enjoyed by the mentioned villages. Here too, the Marshanias are the primary family, with the senior and wealthiest being Kazdatuk Dudarukva Marshania.

The villages of Akhchipsou, Aibga, and Chuzhgucha, being not far from each other, in naturally fortified places, are closely connected through the Marshania family that inhabits them, and together they are known to their neighbors as the Medoveyevtsi. Related to the Abkhazians, they speak the same language and differ neither in lifestyle nor customs from the latter. Among the highlanders, the Medoveyevtsi are known for their predatory behavior, aided by the impregnability of their homes, shielded by mountains from raids by neighbors who might seek retribution.

1. Chuzhi, on the Khudaps River, about 100 families, whose homes are scattered on more open heights than the previous ones; here, grapes are grown, which the Medoveyevtsi do not have, and farming is in better condition. The Chuzhi society acknowledges the authority of Prince Djimir-ipa Islam Baga.
2. Chua, on the Mtsa River, with about 150 families, living spread out over a distance of 3 versts, recognizing the authority of Prince Bezish Achu.

The inhabitants of the Chuzhi and Chua societies, living amicably among themselves, call themselves Abadzes, not adopting the name Sadz, which belongs specifically to the coastal inhabitants of the Abadze tribe.

1. The village of Sochipsy, or Oblagukuadzh, located on both sides of the Sochi River, in a rather extensive valley near its mouth; it has up to 450 families, partly Abazins, partly Ubykhs, and a small number of Turks, united under the name Sashe. The Turks in this village have one of their main settlements and conduct trade with the highlanders from here; their influence on the inhabitants is noticeable by the zeal of the latter in performing the rites of the Muslim religion, which is not seen in other villages.

Prince Ali Akhmet Oblagu, whose origin is from the Adyghe tribe, is a zealous Muslim surrounded by Turks. The Sashe tribe obeys him, although not in all cases; his influence particularly declined when the natives, for unknown reasons, began to suspect him of secret relations with the Russians, but nevertheless, he is the strongest among the princes and owners from the Shah River to the Bzyb River and enjoys good prosperity.
Prince Oblagu*'s house is built one verst from Sochipsy and at the same distance from the sea, where a small barricade of trees and earth has been made to cover the road leading to the village.
In Sochipsy, three languages are in use: Circassian, Abazin, and Ubykh.

1. Khaltis, on the right bank of the Mtsa, near its mouth; about 60 families; adheres to the Hamysh society.
2. Hamysh, on the slope of the mountain, above the sea itself along the river of the same name, recognizes Prince Djembulat Hamysh as their prince, weak even in his own domain, although considered by lineage to be the senior of the Abkhazian princes. There are about 80 families in the village.
3. The Eskhoripsh or Artkuadzh society counts up to 200 families, settled along the Khudaps River, two versts from its mouth; it obeys no one; the uzdens of the Arta family reside there.
4. The Aredba society, settled in the Liesh valley, counts about 430 families, benefiting from the plains, which other villages lack. Farming and cattle breeding are in better condition here than elsewhere, and there is a small herd of horses. The wealth of the Liesh valley inhabitants is known among the Sadzes.

The Aredba brothers - Beslan, Sousran, and Chigua - the senior members of the lineage, have no authority over the people but are respected. They lost their influence when they entered into relations with the Russians and have had to endure frequent reproaches for this.
The settlement of the Aredba society, encompassing the Liesh valley in a crescent shape, is divided into the following auls: Kereka, Abakha, Banshiripsh, Uchuga, and Khishkhoripsh, lying on the slopes of hills bordering the Liesh valley from the east, Kata, and Djankhota...
Along the road leading from the seashore through a small interval to the mentioned villages, 2 or 3 versts from the mouth of the Mzymta to the north, residents have built a large, but weak for defense, barricade on the very sandy shore.

1. Gechkuadzh, on the right side of the Psou River, holds up to 80 families and is inhabited by the Gech family, among whom Edyrbey is the most significant.
2. Tsandrypsh or Tsankuadzh, along the Khuchups River; it has up to 120 houses, mostly occupied by the uzdens of the Tsanbai family, the senior being Hadji Salama.
3. Khyscha, on a mountain, the residence of the Anchabadze family, counts no more than 40 families.
4. Begeucha, or Bagrypsh, the village closest to Gagra, contains about 100 families.

Description of the part of the eastern coast of the Black Sea from the river. Bzybi to the river Sachet
November 25, 1835 , Tiflis F.F Tornau
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d) Psou – between the sources of the Bzyb and Apsta rivers, Aibga – at the upper reaches of the Psou River, Akhchipsou – at the upper reaches of the Mzymta River, Chuzhgucha – at the upper reaches of the Mdy River. These four societies, known among the Circassians living on the northern side of the mountains under the common name Medoveyevtsi, are Abkhazians who have retreated for various reasons to the impregnable rocks adjacent to the eternal snows. Occupying places that are difficult to cultivate, poor in pastures and land products, they are in need of bread, livestock, and clothing. Only in the villages of Akhchipsou and Chuzhgucha do fruit trees grow, which are found along the seashore in Abkhazia and among the Ubykhs. The impregnability of their homes and extreme poverty have made the Medoveyevtsi predators, feared by their neighbors. The Medoveyevtsi form kinship ties with their fellow Abkhazians and Sadz, sometimes maintaining friendly relations with them, and at other times being at enmity.
The Medoveyevtsi are openly hostile to the Circassians: crossing the Caucasus mountain range, they descend into the forested gorges of the Urup, Laba, Khodz, and Belaya rivers, killing Circassians there and capturing their people and livestock. Almost every year, the residents of Chuzhgucha and Akhchipsou drive off sheep from the Abazeks; only once did the Abazeks, having gathered in large numbers, manage to rob several border houses in Akhchipsou.
The Medoveyevtsi have no religious beliefs; only some of the nobles perform the rites prescribed by the Muslim faith, without caring, however, about its doctrines.
In all four Medoveyevtsi villages, the Marshania***(Marshan)*** family is dominant, divided into two lines – the Mas-ipas and the Bagarkan-ipas; the former live in the village of Psou, the latter in Aibga, Akhchipsou, and Chuzhgucha.
Judging by the places they occupy, the Medoveyevtsi cannot be considered to number more than 5,000 males.
A brief overview of the mountain tribes living beyond the Kuban and along the eastern shore of the Black Sea, from the mouth of the Kuban to the mouth of the Ingur
February 1, 1839, St. Petersburg
https://www.vostlit.info/Texts/Dokumenty/Kavkaz/XIX/1820-1840/Tornau_4/text.htm
The coastal Djigets, Shapsugs, and Natukhay are more than ever showing a desire to submit, but the main, so far insurmountable, obstacle in this is the Ubykhs and the mountain Djiget societies of Aibga and Akhchipsou. The leader of this hostile faction is Hadji-Berzok, an old man who is wealthy, enterprising, and has great influence among the people.
Chief of the Black Sea Coastal Line, Lieutenant General N.N. Raevsky: Report to the Chief Military Minister A.I. Chernyshev. March 16, 1840.
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The Medoveyevtsi, who occupy the depths of the mountains, are particularly renowned for the destructiveness of their raids and instill fear even in the mountain tribes, to the extent that they are used to scare children in the mountains...
M.I. Venyukov.
"An Outline of the Area Between the Kuban and Belaya." 1863.
REPORT BY I. R. ANREP, CHIEF OF THE BLACK SEA COASTAL STRIP, TO E. A. GOLOVIN, COMMANDER OF THE CAUCASUS CORPS, ABOUT THE DJIGET AND UBKH NOBLES WHO TOOK THE OATH OF LOYALTY
May 25, 1841
Following report No. 133 from May 6, I am honored to inform Your Excellency about the submission of the Djiget community of Hamish. I am also honored to report that now all the coastal Djigets and part of the Ubykhs have taken an oath of eternal loyalty to Your Excellency and have given hostages.
I am very pleased to inform Your Excellency of this event and would like to present the details of this matter, which promises very important results, with your permission.
The people living in the area between the Ubykhs and Abkhazians are called Saadzen; among the Georgian tribes, these people are known as the Djigets. The Djigets speak Abkhaz and, in their traditions, resemble the Abkhazians more than their other neighbors, the Ubykhs. Since ancient times, the Abkhaz rulers have had influence over them and held them in high regard. The princes and noble families of Abkhazia are related to the Djigets. The social structures of these two peoples are identical: without question, the princes and noble families held power.
During the conquest of Abkhazia, the alliance between this region and the Djigets was destroyed, and in recent years, hostility arose. As a result, the Djigets joined forces with the Ubykhs, who are also known for their warrior skills, and together they launched operations against Abkhazia and our fortifications. The Djigets can be divided into two main groups: the highlanders/mountaineers (Akhchipsa, Aibga, and Pshu) and the coastal people (Hisha, Tsvandrypsh, Gecha, Areda, and Hamish).
The first group can be estimated at 2 to 3 thousand households. The highland Djigets live in the upper reaches of the Mzymta, Psou, and Bzyb rivers, which are difficult to access. Historically, this region has served as a refuge for those pursued by our administration and sought by their people for revenge. Among the surrounding peoples, the highland Djigets are not known for great warrior skills and valor, but they are the most tireless and agile bandits. In the northern part of the Caucasus, they are famous as Medoveev for their predatory activities.
The coastal Djigets' territories are especially divided by the high mountainous area between the Psou and Bzyb rivers, but in the area between these mountains, there are many fertile, rich, and densely populated valleys. Proximity to the sea and trade provided the coastal Djigets with various comforts of life, thus the violent raids on the coast had a direct impact on them. On the other hand, the strengthening of Gagra blocked the best route to Abkhazia for them, forcing the Djigets to take difficult and unsafe snowy mountain paths.
A few years ago, Hadji Berzek swore not to travel to Abkhazia via the mountains after losing 700 men in a snowstorm. We had the means to invade the lands of the Djigets, frequently threatened them on this matter, and sometimes carried out our threats when possible. In 1838, we organized an expedition to capture the Pshu community, which was scattered above the Bzyb River and consisted of 300 households. Circumstances prevented this move, but in 1839, the Pshus themselves surrendered. Subsequently, in 1840, the Hisha community (150 households), subject to the Anchabadze princes, and several villages of Tsvandrypsh closer to Abkhazia were conquered.
ЦГВИА, ф. ВУА, д. 6435, 1841 г., лл. 8-10 об. Копия.
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9. Achyps and Pskhu
The highland Abkhaz tribe Achyps(Akhchipsou) inhabited the headwaters of the Mzymta River in the territory of historical Abkhazia, which is now part of the Russian Federation. The center of the Achyps society was the village and area of Gәbaa-dәы ("Gubaa clan clearing"), known in Russian sources as Kbaade. The tribal self-designation of the group is Achyps (аҳҷыԥсы́//ҳаҷыԥсы́), and it is known by the same name to other Abkhaz communities. Representatives of this group call their language а́ԥсашәа "Abkhaz language". It is noteworthy that the Karachays refer to the Abkhaz as khachyps-ly, as they had the greatest contact with this Abkhaz community.
The Pskhu society lived in a mountain basin at the headwaters of the Bzyb River. In addition to their common self-designation as а́ԥсыуа "Abkhaz", the Pskhu people also refer to their group with the hybrid term ԥсҳәы́-аҳҷыԥсы "Pskhu Achyps". Linguistically, their speech is hardly distinguishable from the speech of the Achyps, and it can also be defined as a dialect of Achyps. The self-designation of both groups (Achyps and Pskhu), now represented only in Turkey, is а́ԥсуа//а́ԥсауа "Abkhaz".
The phonetic system of the Achyps dialect coincides with the system of the Aatsyn dialect of the Bzyb dialect, the Turkish Bzyb dialect, the Sadz dialect of the Tsvydji dialect (but in the absence of the phoneme [f']), and the Tsabal dialect. Like in the Tsabal and Tsvydji dialects, the finite forms of dynamic verbs in the present tense end with -oo-t, while those of stative verbs end with -oo-p. Another feature of Achyps is that it has parallel forms for stative verbs: -u-p (as in the Bzyb and Abzhuy dialects) and -y-t (as in the Sadz dialect and in the Kvin dialect of the Ashkhar dialect), although forms with -y-t are rarer, e.g., "йы́-ҟа-йт" ("that is, there is") alongside the more common "йы́-ҟа-уп" ("there is"). In the Sadz dialect, these forms are also parallel, but forms with -y-t are, on the contrary, more common.
The villages inhabited by representatives of the Achyps and Pschu groups are located in the following provinces of north-central Turkey: Düzce and Sakarya.
Vyacheslav A. Chirikba.
Resettlement of Abkhazians and Abazas in Turkey.
Akhchipsou villages in Turkey; Yeni Mahalle (Tagorek)-Hendek, Yarıca-Hendek, Bıçkı (Yeşil Yayla)-Hendek, Kalayık-Hendek, Karaçökek-Hendek, Çakallık-Hendek, Harmantepe-Hendek, Sümbüllü-Hendek, Hüseyinşeyh-Hendek, Nüfren Beylice (Apsara)-Hendek, Hacımbey (Apsara)-Hendek, Halilbey (Apsara)-Düzce, Akçayır Şabatbey (Apsara), Nüfren Soğuksu (Apsara)-Düzce, Tepsek (Apsara), Kanca(Apsara)-Düzce, Bıçkıatik (Apsara)-Düzce, Ayazdağı (Apsara)-Düzce, Çukurhan(Apsara)-Düzce, Efteniye Süleymanbey-Düzce, Efteniye Zekeriya Mahallesi-Düzce, Efteniye Harziya Mahallesi-Düzce, Efteniye Çayköy-Düzce ve Efteniye Kurak Mahalle-Düzce.
The point that should be known in this information is that villages and neighborhoods such as Nüfren Beylice, Hacımbey, Halilbey, Akçayır Şabatbey, Nüfren Soğuksu, Tepsek, Kanca, Bıçkıatik, Ayazdağı, Çukurhan, Süleymanbey, Zekeriya Mahalle, Harziya Mahalle, Çayköy, Kurak Mahalle are not entirely of Akhchipsou origin. It is a mixture of Akhchipsou, Pskhu and Aibga. There is no clear information about which villages and families are Akhchipsou, which are Pskhu, and which are Aibga. Research on the subject continues.
Today, the Pskhu villages established between Hendek and Düzce in Turkey are Nüfren Beylice, Hacımbey, Halilbey, Akçayır Şabatbey, Nüfren Soğuksu, Tepsek, Kanca, Bıçkıatik, Ayazdağı, Çukurhan, Bıçkı, Karaçökek villages. The Pskhus living here define themselves as Apsua. These villages are not entirely of Pskhu origin, but are mixed with Akhchipsou and Aibga groups. Some of these villages no longer have Abaza(Abkhaz).
(Küçük Abhazya Etnografik Toplulukları./ S.Sımsım)
Medovey tribes (except a few families which relocated to among Abazins in Karachay-Cherkessia) entirely exiled from Caucasus.
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Hi there !
Here I was, striding through my self-teaching, growing more confident day after day, and then I met a difficulty that made me think I did not understand a thing after all.
It all started with δρᾰμοῦμαι / δρᾰμῇ / δρᾰμεῖται and such ; I cannot understand how we get there. The conclusions I came to are thus :

root δρᾰμ-, thus following the rules for future verbs ending in -λω / -μω / -νω / -ρω (which I would like to understand too if possible), leading to δρᾰμ+οῦμαι. Of course, δρᾰμ- ist not exactly δρᾰμω, but I guess the -μ is the important part of the transformation) ;
root δρᾰμ + some thematic vowel -ο- / -ε- + ομαι as ending, thus leading to δρᾰμοομαι / δρᾰμεομαι, both would lead to the desired form δρᾰμοῦμαι. Wiktionary seems to lean this way, presenting here a δρᾰμέομαι non contracted form. At this point, I'ld benefit from a link to a good article on thematic vowels and the occurences of ending in -ομαι rather than -μαι. The latter option would go a long way toward explaining the following forms δρᾰμῇ and δρᾰμεῖται too, if the supposed thematic vowel change in the usual pattern of o/ε/ε. Of course, the former would work too in this regard (though again, I don't have a clue about the details involved).

Thanks in advance ! It's starting to tank my ability to go forward.
P.S : behind this wall is the question of how to conjugate all those irregulars verbs I know but the singular first person of, but it's more of a proofing task at this point. A huge one though.
Stupid bonus question : I often got confused about ending through forgetting that a verb is forming has a thematic aorist form ; does that matter in other tenses (like the future)? It should not, of course, but... just to be sure !

I’ll always feel guilty for the loss of a potential family, but I desperately want this man off my mind. I don’t even know where to begin. I just have a lot to say and no one who really has the time to listen. I’ll try to stay vague but our social circles don’t really intermingle and I don’t think I know anyone on here in real life. I can barely remember specific moments or map together periods of time cohesively but I’ll try my best. I used bullet points on my notes app to try to organize the important parts. So if it reads weird or blocky, I apologize.
I hate to admit that I think I still love my baby’s father. That may not even be true. I’m hoping it’s just the drastic hormone changes after having a baby. I don’t want to reconcile or get back together, I just want a genuine opinion from anyone that bothers to read the entire thing or advise from anyone that may have been in a similar situation. It was a very toxic and abusive relationship due to both parties. I toyed with his feelings until it was too late and he would drink and get physical. I was always accusing him of cheating or wanting to cheat because my ex had cheated. Meanwhile I was in fact projecting in a way because I was still messaging said ex. Ex and I were friends before we had dated and were together for 2 years. He had cheated on his other relationships so I should have seen it coming, but he ended up trying to cheat on me and I ended things. I was 19-20 at the time and joined tinder. Experimented a little but ended up hooking up with a guy that had a crush on me in HS. We only hooked up 2-3 times but it started getting weird and I chickened out. Then I got an apartment and a better job and started casually hooking up with the ex again. I think he had a gf at this time but I didn’t ask. At the new job is where I met BD. He started a few weeks after me. I was 20 and he was 28 at the time. We started hanging out after work to smoke. It’s not something I would normally do with just one person and he wasn’t really my type. But the hangouts got longer and more frequent. And I ended up cutting the ex off again. A couple months in, I moved in way too soon because my roommate and I didn’t get along. My ex would still message me occasionally for some reason. He definitely had a gf at this time. Some would be nudes. I didn’t encourage the behavior but I also didn’t discourage it. Bd saw the messages while we were on vacation and was understandably upset. I was upset with myself for responding. I justified it to myself by claiming I was trying to waste his time. In reality he was wasting mine and not suffering in the slightest. There couldn’t have been a worse moment for him to find the messages. The week was supposed to be a huge step in our relationship and I could see how crushed he was. If I were him I would have left me in the hotel states away and gone home that morning. The whole ride home I was sick. I couldn’t imagine how he was feeling, over something I so easily could have avoided and someone I had no interest in romantically or sexually anymore. I believe this is the first time Things got physical but as I said, the timeline is super blurry now. Regardless, if it was the first time, it should’ve been the last. No one should put up with being hit. And No one should feel that their only option is to put their hands on someone. This was when we were finally getting back to his house in our own state. He had picked up a few beers before hand, and that was generally his fuel to either argue or get violent. He had slapped me, choked me and spit in my face, all to which I gave him no reaction. I just sat on the bed silently, or tried to lock myself in the bathroom. He would walk away to smoke a cigarette and immediately come back to fight some more. He told me to pack up my shit but got more pissed off when he came inside to see me packing up my shit. I eventually got a few things packed up and made it to my grandmas’s house. We both calmed down and after a few calls and texts. he wanted to see where I was staying. I picked him up and brought him to my grandma‘s house. (Note: I should probably add that right before we got together. He got in a car accident that totally totaled his car and got a DUI. Since then I had been his ride and always joked That that’s all he kept me around for) We arrived at my grandma’s house, where she had a guestroom ready for me. He just sat on the bed with his head down and cried. He said that it looked like it was so easy for me to move on without him. Looking back, this should’ve been another red flag. All I had was a place to stay after being kicked out. He couldn’t accept that I would land on my feet without him. Most of my belongings were still at his house, and I didn’t want to burden my grandmother any further So I ended up going back with him. At this time I was still apologizing to him for what I had done and how I had made him react. One night after an argument, and a rough day in general. He walked out to grab a case of beer from the gas station and didn’t come back for hours. When I finally went out looking for him, he was at the spot that we had first kissed. There He told me I was holding him back From what he envisioned for his future. It was a lot more drawn out, less cohesive and not so nice (he had been well into his beer by then) but that was the gist of it. One of my biggest fears is being a burden, or anyone holding some secret resentment towards me. Him drinking only let me know how he truly felt and how he wanted to react. I could never put the same effort into the relationship after that. I felt like it was already over and had been over for a long time. A while later, he had seen that my ex reached out again nothing flirtatious this time, but he was still upset, understandably. He got violent again, and I locked myself in the bathroom. He took my keys and my phone and said he was going to go find him. I packed up a few things again and tried to walk over to my dad‘s house. His mission was futile and he ended up finding me walking and brought me back home. The whole night was tense and I didn’t feel safe in the morning before he woke up. I started quietly packing up my things. He woke up and immediately flew into a rage and started dumping my things out onto the ground. I called my mom to help me get out all the big things because I wanted to be all out in one trip. As I was leaving, he was screaming at my mother and I about how much a piece of shit I was, but was right back to begging for me back as soon as I was down the road. This was a reoccurring cycle for us. I’d always keep my phone and keys together in a designated spot in the house so I could get them quickly if I needed to leave. The ex no longer reached out, but we were both still suspicious of one another. Sometimes I would be gone for days sometimes weeks my belongings no longer came back because it didn’t feel like home anymore. It didn’t Feel like a safe or stable place for me. This also made him upset. Every time I would leave we would still text every day. It was an extremely toxic situation. During one period of time that i was gone He had one of our coworkers over for about a week sleeping in my bed with my cats. Throughout our entire relationship and our brakes I never met up with another person. I did leave so I didn’t have the right to be too upset. But He wasted no time having her over for an extended period of time while still begging for me to come back every day. Then I had to coax this information out of him after finding her clothes all over the house. I couldn’t get over the feeling that he had her and others lined up for when I was gone and him wanting me back meant nothing. By this time the dude I had gone to school/hooked up with had started at our job (This would seem like a cruel joke but we were in the same trade and this was one of the only decent jobs in our town.) I guess we had had a silent mutual agreement to keep out past between us because they became friends. Well, After finding out about his coworker, I told him about mine. It didn’t matter that the dates didn’t overlap. He went nutts. I don’t remember exactly how it all went down after that, but I left of course and he ended up going to this 20 year olds apartment. His roommate answered and BD demanded to know where this dude was and ends up slapping the roommate. (I have no idea why I kept going back. Typing this out, I feel so stupid. He was clearly fucking crazy and my brain was telling me to get the fuck out.) I was already suspicious of him because of how we both acted before we got together, but all of this just made it so much worse. I wanted to know why he felt the need to intimidate me into staying with him and calling it “crazy love” when he could so easily move on and leave me alone. (Why did infidelity have to be the dealbreaker and not everything else?) Bringing up my suspicions or insecurities, just made him defensive and occasionally violent. I never got any reassurance and my reasons for staying were few and far between. Then we found out I was pregnant. We found out when I was about seven weeks pregnant. The last time we had gotten into a physical fight I had been about 4 to 5 weeks pregnant. I was scared. Bd seemed happy. He said he wanted to be a family. Over the next few weeks, I was having extremely bad morning sickness I was in and out of the hospital on an IV for fluids and couldn’t leave our bedroom or bathroom. I still had to drive him to and from work which was only about 30 min round trip but I’d always have to stop on the side of the road to puke. (Note: There were five cats living in this house that I was Feeding and cleaning up after. We inherited two from the homeowner and three were ours) The house started to smell because I could no longer keep up with the cats, and this just made my morning sickness even worse. On top of this, I was having extremely bad back pain that I thought was just a symptom of pregnancy. After one of my trips to the hospital for fluids, they informed me that I had a UTI. I was about 10-11 weeks pregnant by then. I tried to tell him that I needed help with the house and that it was making me miserable. He just expressed that I would be complaining regardless. Whether it be about him spending enough time with me, helping clean, or working. This wasn’t even the worst of the treatment that I had received, but being pregnant, This was the last straw. I knew I couldn’t bring a baby into the abusive cycle that we were putting each other through. I don’t remember exactly how it happened. At this point I was looking for any reason to leave. But it happened and again I started packing up my shit. This time he barely put up a fight. He tried to dump my stuff out on the floor once, but I said if he tried to put his hands on me, I’d call the police this time. He sat in the kitchen on his phone until I was done packing. As I was carrying my belongings out to my car still weak and sick, we were screaming back-and-forth about how much we hated each other, and how I would never give him the chance to put his hands on my child. He shouted that he didn’t think the baby was even his, to which I replied, “Good, then I’ll never have to fight you in court”. That was our last face to face interaction. I filed for a civil protection order. It’s been about a year and since then, he has been claiming to his coworkers and his mother that my ex is the father. His mother doesn’t seem to believe him as she had kept in contact with me throughout my pregnancy, and since the baby’s been born. She requests a paternity test just to be sure, but I have no doubts that the baby is his. I am almost positive that he knows the baby is his too. His claims of me cheating are only his way of justifying me leaving and making it my fault. I sent her the information to reach out for a paternity test, but she hasn’t shown me any indication that he wants to be part of the baby’s life. Any time she brings up the situation to him, he gets angry with her and hangs up. I don’t know what’s going on in his life and I don’t want to. I’d only obsess over it and make myself upset if I did. I assume he’s living his dream and chasing his goals without me there to hold him back, especially with a child. Even after typing all this out and rereading and editing, I still miss him. I shouldn’t. I can’t tell if it’s the cycle calling me back or the drastic changes in hormones. I can’t even think of a reason that I should miss him. I don’t even think I miss him, just his presence or energy? It’s so hard to explain and I don’t want to feel this way. I have nightmares about trying to get away from him and out of the house but try to force myself back into the same dream just so I can see him. Is this normal? Do any other moms feel this way? Only attracted to the baby’s father even while split up? I have no sex drive when I used to be a fiend. I heard this can be a side-effect of the drastic hormone changes, but I don’t even feel an attraction anymore. Unless they’re a very specific type (My BD). I have no desire to move on or find a romantic connection. I do more harm than good and I’d rather focus on being a mom (which I’m loving aside from this issue).I know there’s no way of going back even if I wanted to. The damage has been more than done. I just want to make moving on easier and forget him. Do I just have to wait?