Does aspirin alleve contain

Preventative Cardiology (Part 2)

2024.05.31 16:22 4990 Preventative Cardiology (Part 2)

Preventative Cardiology Part 2: Lipids
Lipids, specifically circulating lipoproteins (which are varying quantities of cholesterol and triglyceride combined with protein) are the most important, established conventional risk factor for atherosclerotic cardiovascular disease (ASCVD). Between 10-15% of the US population has high LDL cholesterol (bad cholesterol, see below) often part of metabolic syndrome (extensive discussion to come in a subsequent post). This circulating LDL cholesterol deposits in blood vessels including the coronary arteries leading to first fatty streaks and later mature plaques. Those plaques can block the artery causing chest pain as well as spontaneously rupture leading to a heart attack. See diagram for a simplified overview of plaque development. Importantly, HDL lipoproteins can pull cholesterol out of plaques returning it to the liver and thus are thought to confer some protection from ASCVD.
A standard lipid panel that your doctor orders includes the following measures:

Total Cholesterol
LDL Cholesterol (Low-Density Lipoprotein)
HDL Cholesterol (High-Density Lipoprotein)
Triglycerides
Non-HDL Cholesterol

Your doctor then takes those numbers and puts it into a risk calculator to determine if you are low, intermediate, or high risk to make a decision about whether to offer you a statin or other cholesterol lowering therapy. The biggest risk factor is actually not cholesterol levels it's your age so a 40 year may not be offered a statin with the exact same numbers a 60 year old would. Longevity is based on primordial prevention, which is prevention long before diseases develop, so I think this is a fundamentally flawed approach. It works at a population level but for individuals it undervalues lifetime risk. As a 40 year old, I may have a 3% 10 year risk, but my lifetime risk of an event is 70%. Thus, in conventional practice I would not be offered cholesterol lowering medication. The moment I turn 50, and my 10 year risk exceeds 5%, then I would. Individualized decision making is key as is super early intervention with both medication and lifestyle (diet, etc).
Some nonconventional but still very important lipid markers not routinly tested are:

Lp(a) (Lipoprotein a)
ApoB (Apolipoprotein B)
Lipoprotein Fractionation
Omega 3 Fatty Acid Index

Lp(a), another lipoprotein, is a one time test. Elevated levels greatly increases risk of ASCVD irrespective of conventional lipid markers and often necessitate things like aspirin for primary prevention (fallen out of favor for most populations but reasonable with elevated Lp(a)) and more intensive control of conventional risk factors.
ApoB (Apolipoprotein B) actually doesn't measure cholesterol at all like the conventional lipid panel does; rather it measures the protein contained on all atherogenic (plaque forming) lipoproteins. That includes LDL but also VLDL and ILDL. Many people, including myself, thinks it gives a more complete picture of atherogenic risk and should be included with the conventional markers.
Lipoprotein Fractionation breaks down the LDL particles into their subtypes. This is important because we know that small, dense LDL particles are the most atherogenic. A relatively normal LDL number may belie a very elevated small dense LDL particle number, which would necessitate more intensive treatment.
Finally, Omega 3 Fatty Acid Index, measures the amount of EPA + DHA in your red blood cells (a surrogate marker for whole body levels). Omega 3s although a bit controversial are widely thought to be protective against ASCVD. Most Americans are deficient and 8%+ on this index has been shown to be protective in a number of well designed studies.
Treating lipids include Statin, Ezetimibe, PSK9 inhibitors, bempadoic acid, fish oil supplements, and fiber supplements as well as dietary approaches like the Mediterranean diet. Nevertheless it all starts with knowing your numbers and risk.
In part 3, we will discuss inflammation as a risk factor for cardiovascular disease.

submitted by 4990 to healthylongevity [link] [comments]

2024.05.23 01:12 rechtaugen Gardasil Vaccine contains the widely-renowned neurotoxin Ionized Aluminum (+3)

Gardasil contains a widely-renowned neurotoxin:
Gardasil Vaccine Contents (FDA):

What are the ingredients in GARDASIL? The ingredients are proteins of HPV Types 6, 11, 16, and 18, amorphous aluminum hydroxyphosphate sulfate, yeast protein, sodium chloride, L-histidine, polysorbate 80, sodium borate, and water for injection.

https://www.fda.gov/media/74356/download
Basic chemistry courses inform us that ionic compounds, such as the aluminum +3 in aluminum hydroxyphosphate sulfate, dissolve in water, and thus in your body, into their constituent ions.
Here is an image of the representation of aluminum hydroxyphosphate sulfate
http://www.chemspider.com/Chemical-Structure.16385247.html
https://pubchem.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/compound/Aluminum-hydroxyphosphate

Its free ion, Al(3+) (aq), is highly biologically reactive and uniquely equipped to do damage to essential cellular (neuronal) biochemistry.
The Birchall Centre, Lennard-Jones Laboratories, Keele University, Staffordshire, UK.
https://www.keele.ac.uk/scps/chemistry/ourfacilitiesandequipment/laboratories/

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24779346/

Aluminum is an experimentally demonstrated neurotoxin and the most commonly used vaccine adjuvant. Despite almost 90 years of widespread use of aluminum adjuvants, medical science's understanding about their mechanisms of action is still remarkably poor. There is also a concerning scarcity of data on toxicology and pharmacokinetics of these compounds. In spite of this, the notion that aluminum in vaccines is safe appears to be widely accepted. Experimental research, however, clearly shows that aluminum adjuvants have a potential to induce serious immunological disorders in humans. In particular, aluminum in adjuvant form carries a risk for autoimmunity, long-term brain inflammation and associated neurological complications and may thus have profound and widespread adverse health consequences. In our opinion, the possibility that vaccine benefits may have been overrated and the risk of potential adverse effects underestimated, has not been rigorously evaluated in the medical and scientific community.
Neural Dynamics Research Group, Department of Ophthalmology and Visual Sciences, University of British Columbia, Vancouver, BC, V5Z 1L8, Canada.
https://www.ubc.ca/about/

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21568886/
Additionally, aluminum is carcinogenic, likely causing or contributing to the formation of cancer.

Aluminium is present in the human brain and it accumulates with age.
...we know that aluminium is a potent pro-oxidant, its interaction with the superoxide radical anion establishing, fuelling and sustaining redox cycles.
The Birchall Centre, Lennard-Jones Laboratories, Keele University, Staffordshire, UK.
https://www.keele.ac.uk/scps/chemistry/ourfacilitiesandequipment/laboratories/

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1586/14737175.2014.915745
Pro-oxidant's cause cancer.

Under normal conditions, anti-oxidants outbalance pro-oxidants, but under oxidative conditions, pro-oxidants prevail over anti-oxidants, which can lead to many inflammatory diseases including cancer.
Cytokine Research Laboratory, Department of Experimental Therapeutics, The University of Texas MD Anderson Cancer Center, Houston, Texas 77030, USA
https://www.mdanderson.org/research/departments-labs-institutes/departments-divisions/experimental-therapeutics.html

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2990475/
Here is a general summary on aluminum from the CDC.
https://wwwn.cdc.gov/TSP/ToxFAQs/ToxFAQsDetails.aspx?faqid=190&toxid=34
I would like to point out here that environmental aluminum exposure is something to avoid, only a very small amount will make its way to your blood. From past reading, ~99% ingested aluminum passes through via ingestion. Nonetheless, the CDC urges you to reduce environmental exposure. So why aren't they nearly as concerned about directly injected highly ionized aluminum?

Only very small amounts of aluminum that you may inhale, ingest, or have skin contact with will enter the bloodstream.

The CDC or it's agent doesn't have a position on carcinogenicity.

How likely is aluminum to cause cancer? The Department of Health and Human Services (DHHS) and the EPA have not evaluated the carcinogenic potential of aluminum in humans. Aluminum has not been shown to cause cancer in animals.

The CDC published document advises avoiding giving aluminum to kids with kidney problems. Do we regularly test children for kidney problems before administering aluminum injections?

Children with kidney problems who were given aluminum in their medical treatments developed bone diseases. It does not appear that children are more sensitive to aluminum than adults.

The CDC published document says birth defects in humans hasn't been tested, and in animals is at least not obvious.

We do not know if aluminum will cause birth defects in people. Birth defects have not been seen in animals.

The CDC published document then advises that certain amounts of aluminum causes skeletal and neurological development disorders. But... the CDC document just stated that they haven't seen birth defects? Am I misunderstanding these two statements? Do smaller amounts also cause issues, but less noticeably?

Aluminum in large amounts has been shown to be harmful to unborn and developing animals because it can cause delays in skeletal and neurological development.

Aluminum is being transferred from parent to nursing undeveloped infant.

Aluminum is found in breast milk, but only a small amount of this aluminum will enter the infant's body through breastfeeding.

Aluminum is everywhere. In the air, in your water, in your hygiene products, as a regular ingredient used in your food.

How can families reduce the risks of exposure to aluminum? Since aluminum is so common and widespread in the environment, families cannot avoid exposure to aluminum. Avoid taking large quantities of aluminum-containing antacids and buffered aspirin and take these medications as directed.

Aluminum accumulates long term in your bones. It doesn't simply "flush out".

Is there a medical test to determine whether I've been exposed to aluminum? All people have small amounts of aluminum in their bodies. Aluminum can be measured in blood, bones, feces, or urine. Urine and blood aluminum measurements can tell you whether you have been exposed to larger-than-normal amounts of aluminum. Measuring bone aluminum can also indicate exposure to high levels, but this requires a bone biopsy.

Additional source:

Aluminum (Al) is a neurotoxicant; however, efforts to understand Al toxicity are limited by the lack of a quantitative biomarker of cumulative exposure. Bone Al measurements may address this need.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7112220/
School of Health Sciences, Purdue University, West Lafayette, IN, USA
Department of Cancer Epidemiology, H. Lee Moffitt Cancer Center and Research Institute, Tampa, FL, USA
Department of Radiation Oncology, Emory University, Atlanta, GA, USA
School of Public Health, Yale University, New Haven, CT, USA
Department of Radiation Oncology, University of Arizona, Tucson, AZ, USA
School of Public Health, Zunyi Medical University, Zunyi, Guizhou, China
Zunyi Medical and Pharmaceutical College, Zunyi, Guizhou, China
*Corresponding author: Ellen M. Wells, address: Purdue University, School of Health Sciences, Hampton Hall 1269, 550 Stadium Mall Drive, West Lafayette, IN 47907-2051, ude.eudrup@45sllew
These authors made equal contributions to the work
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7112220/

submitted by rechtaugen to DebateVaccines [link] [comments]

2024.05.22 07:39 SchrodingersMinou Rabies FAQ - Please read before posting!

Before you post a question to this subreddit, please read the following points. I know, it's a lot to read, but 99% of you will get answers to your questions here. These points contain verified, accurate FACTS as verified through the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) and World Health Organization (WHO).
1. Is this a bat bite?
Bat bites cannot be identified from a photo. No one, not even a doctor or a bat biologist, can identify a bat bite from a photo. If you think you might have bat bite, ask yourself: Have you seen a bat in your home? Did you sleep outdoors where a bat might have bitten you? Did you pick up a bat in your hand? If you answer no, it's HIGHLY UNLIKELY you were bitten by a bat. Again, bat bites cannot be identified from a photo.
2. Can I get rabies from interacting with an animal? Can I get rabies from touching something? Can I get rabies from a dead animal, or a vaccinated pet? What about if a drop of liquid falls on me? Can I get rabies from contaminated food or water? Can I get rabies from a person? What about anything else that does not involve a rabid animal physically attacking me?
No. YOU CAN ONLY GET RABIES VIA DIRECT CONTACT WITH A RABID ANIMAL. This means being bitten or scratched by a rabid animal. Rabies is transmitted via the saliva of an infected animal in the late stages of the disease, when the virus is being shed in the saliva by the host animal. The rabies virus dies almost immediately once it’s outside the body. You can’t get rabies from touching something a rabid animal touched. You can’t get rabies from your pet meeting a rabid animal and then bringing it home to you. You can’t get rabies from touching roadkill. You can’t get rabies from something falling on you. You can’t get rabies from touching or kissing someone who has been vaccinated. You can’t get rabies from touching something wet. You can’t get rabies from touching any surface whatsoever, even if you have a cut on your body or you touch your eye/nose/mouth afterwards. You can't get rabies from eating something an animal touched or licked. You CAN get rabies from eating the raw meat of a rabid animal, like a rabid dog. Getting rabies from touching an animal and then touching your eye/nose/mouth is theoretically possible, but this has never happened to anyone in recorded history.
3. I found a suspicious mark on my body but I didn't see or feel a bat touch me and I didn’t find a bat in my house. Did a bat bite me while I was walking outside, and I just didn't notice it? Did a bat sneak into my house to bite me and then sneak back out?
Bats are NOT invisible or ninjas. If you wake up in the morning with a mark on your body, it is HIGHLY UNLIKELY to be a bat bite unless you find a bat in your house. If a bat gets in your house, you will see it. They are not good at finding their way out on their own. It’s very unlikely that a sober, alert, adult human would not notice being bitten by a bat. Finding little marks on your body is not unusual and that is no reason to assume an invisible bat attacked you.
4. I saw a bat near me. Or I heard a bat. Or I saw or heard something that might have been a bat. Did a bat bite me without me noticing?
Bats cannot fly past you and bite you in mid-flight. That is physically impossible. A bat must LAND on you, hold on to you with their tiny fingers, and then bite you. After biting you, they must then push off of you to take flight again. Bats can be small, but they're not invisible or imperceptible. You would notice a big bug landing on you and biting you, and you would notice a bat doing it too. If a bat crashes into you and makes physical contact with you, there is a possibility that it may have scratched you, and rabies shots are recommended unless you are in a country free of bat rabies. If you find a bat in your house and you are not in a country free of bat rabies, you should catch it and submit it for rabies testing; if you can’t do that, or if you have small children in the house, rabies shots are recommended.
5. An animal touched me, licked me, or sneezed on me. Could I get rabies from this?
You cannot get rabies from a wound that doesn’t break the skin. Rabies can only get into your body through an opening in your body: a scratch or bite. If you are bitten or scratched by an animal, you should wash the area with soap and water for 5 minutes. If it does not bleed at all, you may not have broken the skin and could be in the clear. You can test this by putting alcohol on the abrasion to see if it stings.
6. Can I get rabies from an animal that has current rabies vaccinations? Can my pet get rabies if it has current rabies vaccinations?
No. Animals with current rabies shots cannot catch or transmit rabies. If you are bitten or scratched by someone’s pet, ask the owner for proof of rabies vaccination, like a rabies tag on the collar. Take a photo or copy of these records and call their vet to verify them. If the shots are current, you're not at risk of rabies infection. If the pet owner cannot provide this proof of vaccination, contact your animal control department or rabies management / health department to file a "Bite Report". If you are in the USA, you can find a list of those agencies here: https://www.cdc.gov/rabies/resources/contacts.html
7. Can I get rabies from my pet, or from a friend or neighbor’s pet, that doesn't have current rabies shots?
You may not need to get rabies shots if you can observe the animal that attacked you for two weeks. If you are bitten or scratched by a pet that is not vaccinated for rabies, the standard protocol is to quarantine the animal in an animal shelter or veterinarian's office for 10-14 days. If you were attacked by someone else’s pet and that is not possible, you can observe the animal for 14 days. If it doesn’t get sick and/or die of rabies, then you are not at risk of rabies and do not need rabies shots. If the animal is healthy in 14 days, IT DOES NOT HAVE RABIES and neither do you. Since most animals in the late stages of rabies typically die in about 48 hours, this is a very cautious timeframe to observe.
8. Can I get rabies from a bug, bird, snake, or frog? Can I get rabies from a possum, or a rat or mouse?
No. Only mammals (furry animals) can carry rabies. Reptiles, amphibians, insects, and birds can’t carry rabies. Bats are one of the most common rabies carriers in the US, although less than half of 1% of all bats will ever get rabies. In the USA, the next most common species are raccoons, skunks, and foxes. Outside of the USA, dogs, cats, and other animals have been known to spread the rabies virus. The least common mammals include Virginia opossums, rodents (rats and mice), rabbits or hares, and squirrels. Globally, the #1 risk of rabies is dog bites.
9. Is there a risk of rabies in my area? Can I get rabies in India, or the UK?
To learn about rabies statistics for your area, Google your state or country's name and the phrase 'current rabies statistics'. These websites will tell you how many rabid animals have been found in your area and what species. They should also tell you who to call to report a bite. Some parts of the world are rabies-free and there is no rabies or risk of rabies infection. The UK (and most of western Europe) is free of rabies in most animals except for bats, which is rare. India has a high rabies risk which is mostly from dogs.
10. I was vaccinated for rabies. Does that mean I am protected for life and will never need booster shots? Will I need to get booster shots every single time I get attacked by an animal?
No. Previously vaccinated people still get boosters if they are re-exposed to rabies. Your rabies titer can be high for a few months or for many years, but it is assumed that you are protected for at least three months after getting your initial shots. If you are bitten by animal and it has been LESS than 90 days since your last shot, you don’t need to do anything. If it has been MORE than 90 days since your last shot, you would still need post-exposure booster shots IF you are directly exposed to an animal that could be rabid. You do not need to go through the entire series of shots again; you only need booster shots.
· For more information about rabies and rabies shots, see the CDC website here: https://www.cdc.gov/rabies/index.html
· If you are in the USA here is a link to the state and local rabies contacts. USA State & Local Rabies Contacts
11. I was vaccinated for rabies but I did not receive immunogloblin (HRIG/ERIG). Why? Is that OK?
RIG is sometimes not given if there is no visible wound or if you were bitten/scratched in a location that is hard to inject. For instance, it would be hard to inject RIG into your ear. If you have no visible wound, then there is no way to tell where RIG should be injected. If you have more questions about this, ASK YOUR DOCTOR.
12. I got rabies shots but I have questions about the specific medical care I received. Why did the doctor give me the care I received? I’m immunocompromised; do I need extra shots? Will my medication interact with the vaccine?
Ask your doctor questions about the specific medical care you received. People on the internet cannot answer those questions. A doctor’s job is to treat patients and explain their care to them so it is OK to ask follow-up questions even after you leave the office.
13. I waited a long time before I got rabies shots. Or I drank a beer after I got vaccinated, or I took an aspirin. Or a doctor gave me tetanus shots at the same time. Will the rabies shots still work?
Yes. Rabies vaccines are 100% effective if you get them before the virus reaches your brain and symptoms start, which usually takes 3 weeks to one year. For more info about symptoms, see FAQ #17. If you have more questions about your medical treatment, ASK YOUR DOCTOR.
14. I am in a country that is not the US, or I am traveling. Why did doctors in my country give me a different schedule of shots than the ones recommended by the CDC or the WHO? Why did doctors in two different countries tell me two different shot schedules? Will the shots work?
Yes. Rabies protocols vary by country. The CDC guidance is specific to the USA, and the WHO guidance is a recommendation for all countries. Some countries give different numbers of shots on different days. That is OK. The schedules all work as long as you stick to them and finish the series. To find more information about a country’s rabies shot schedule, google the name of the country + rabies vaccination + regimen or protocol or schedule.
15. I was attacked by an animal a long time ago but I never got rabies shots. Could I get rabies from that? How long does it take to develop symptoms?
The incubation period for rabies is typically 2–3 months but may vary from 1 week to 1 year. Bites on the hands or feet have longer incubation periods than bites on the neck or face, and bites from a scratch have longer incubation periods than deep bites. Extremely rare cases of longer incubation periods of up to 7 years have been documented. That is rare, and it's generally hard to prove that someone didn't have a more recent exposure to rabies.
16. I think I have health anxiety and I can’t stop thinking about rabies all the time. How can I get help for this?
See this link. The automod can be summoned to share this information with a comment that includes the word “helpbot."
17. Someone is asking questions in the sub that I think are super dumb. Should I tell them that?
No. Please do not be rude or impatient. There is a real difference between a legitimate rabies scare and Persistent Health Anxiety (PHA), a subset of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). OCD and anxiety are real diseases that can have physical symptoms, and there are treatments for them that many people don’t know how to access. Both conditions are terrifying and life-altering, and both conditions deserve support. In this group, we support people who ask for help and we applaud them for finding the courage to do so. We will be kind, patient, respectful, and do our best to provide emotional support to anyone who seeks help here. All posts and/or replies that are in any way unkind, impatient, or rude will be immediately removed and the author may be temporarily or permanently banned from this group. Be nice!!
18. I feel sick. Do I have rabies?
If you feel sick, see a doctor. You may have another disease, including anxiety, which can have physical symptoms. We cannot diagnose you over the internet. See a doctor.
The incubation period for rabies is typically 2–3 months but may vary from 1 week to 1 year, depending on factors such as the location of virus entry and the viral load. If you believe you are experiencing symptoms before 1 week after exposure, that is not rabies. If you think you are experiencing symptoms more than 1 year after exposure, it is almost certainly not rabies. if you have not been exposed to a rabid animal and you believe you are experiencing rabies symptoms, you are not infected and are most likely experiencing anxiety. the prodromal stage lasts for a few days to a month and the acute neurologic stage lasts for a few days to a week; if you have symptoms that last longer than this, you do not have rabies.
Rabies symptoms only begin when the virus reaches the brain. It MUST reach the brain and produce SEVERE NEUROLOGICAL symptoms before it reaches the throat and salivary glands. This means that your sore throat is NOT caused by rabies unless you also have a severe fever, are experiencing loss of consciousness, paralysis, and seizures.
Also, rabies symptoms do not go away until death. You don't have a fever and then the fever goes away for the next symptoms. Every symptom stacks on top of the other symptoms. If you are experiencing 1 out 10 symptoms, it's NOT RABIES. Rabies is not mild. It's SEVERE in every way. If you are experiencing rabies symptoms you will need to be hospitalized within the first 8 hours of symptoms.
IT IS NOT TOO LATE TO GET VACCINATED UNTIL SYMPTOMS START, but only get vaccinated if you were attacked by a rabid animal. Waking up with a mystery scratch is not a rabies exposure.
Rabies symptoms are as follows, IN THIS ORDER:
Prodromal Stage:
• Extreme Fever
• Extreme Headache
Acute neurologic phase:
• Visual Disturbances, Hallucinations
• Delirium, Confusion
• Tremors, Seizures, Repetitive Uncontrollable Movements
• Fading In and Out of Consciousness
• Light Sensitivity, Sensitivity to Wind / Moving Air
• Partial Paralysis of Extremities, Paralysis of One or Both Legs or Arms
• Excessive Salivation, combined with the inability to swallow AT ALL, not even your own saliva which causes excessive drooling
• Inability to Swallow - NOT SORE THROAT - Inability to eat or drink, or swallow your own saliva production
• Extreme Aversion to sight or sound of water, food, or drink, AKA hydrophobia
• Coma
Without extreme medical intervention, which usually is an induced coma, these symptoms will progress to death very rapidly. Most patients who reach the point of excessive salivation and hydrophobia die within 12-24 hours without intervention.
IF YOU ARE EXPERIENCING THESE SYMPTOMS, CALL 911 AND GET TO A HOSPITAL IMMEDIATELY. IF YOU CAN REPLY TO THIS MESSAGE, YOU ARE NOT EXPERIENCING RABIES SYMPTOMS. PEOPLE WITH ACTIVE RABIES INFECTIONS CANNOT TYPE, TALK, OR DEBATE WHETHER OR NOT THEY ARE SICK. IF YOU CAN READ THIS AND REPLY, IT'S NOT RABIES.

submitted by SchrodingersMinou to rabies [link] [comments]

2024.05.09 21:50 RedditVaccineInjury "What The News Isn't Saying About Vaccine-Autism Studies"

Full article here:
https://sharylattkisson.com/2016/11/what-the-news-isnt-saying-about-vaccine-autism-studies/
A Small Sampling
Many of the studies have common themes regarding a subset of susceptible children with immunity issues who, when faced with various vaccine challenges, end up with brain damage described as autism.
“Permanent brain damage” is an acknowledged, rare side effect of vaccines; there’s no dispute in that arena. The question is whether the specific form of autism brain injury after vaccination is in any way related to vaccination.
So what are a few of these published studies supporting a possible link between vaccines and autism?
As far back as 1998, a serology study by the College of Pharmacy at University of Michigan supported the hypothesis that an autoimmune response from the live measles virus in MMR vaccine “may play a causal role in autism.” (Nothing to see here, say the critics, that study is old.)
In 2002, a Utah State University study found that “an inappropriate antibody response to MMR [vaccine], specifically the measles component thereof, might be related to pathogenesis of autism.” (“Flawed and non-replicable,” insist the propagandists.)
Also in 2002, the Autism Research Institute in San Diego looked at a combination of vaccine factors. Scientists found the mercury preservative thimerosal used in some vaccines (such as flu shots) could depress a baby’s immunity. That could make him susceptible to chronic measles infection of the gut when he gets MMR vaccine, which contains live measles virus. (The bloggers say it’s an old study, and that other studies contradict it.)
In 2006, a team of microbiologists in Cairo, Egypt concluded, “deficient immune response to measles, mumps and rubella vaccine antigens might be associated with autism, as a leading cause or a resulting event.”
A 2007 study found statistically significant evidence suggesting that boys who got the triple series Hepatitis B vaccine when it contained thimerosal were “more susceptible to developmental disability” than unvaccinated boys.
Similarly, a 5-year study of 79,000 children by the same institution found boys given Hepatitis B vaccine at birth had a three times increased risk for autism than boys vaccinated later or not at all. Nonwhite boys were at greatest risk. (“Weak study,” say the critics.)
A 2009 study in The Journal of Child Neurology found a major flaw in a widely-cited study that claimed no link between thimerosal in vaccines and autism. Their analysis found that “the original p value was in error and that a significant relation does exist between the blood levels of mercury and diagnosis of an autism spectrum disorder.”
[quote]The researchers noted, “Like the link between aspirin and heart attack, even a small effect can have major health implications. If there is any link between autism and mercury, it is absolutely crucial that the first reports of the question are not falsely stating that no link occurs.”[/quote] (Critics: the study is not to be believed.)
A 2010 rat study by the Polish Academy of Sciences suggested “likely involvement” of thimerosal in vaccines (such as flu shots) “in neurodevelopmental disorders such as autism.” (The critics dismiss rat studies.)
In 2010, a pilot study in Acta Neurobiologiae Experimentalis found that infant monkeys given the 1990’s recommended pediatric vaccine regimen showed important brain changes warranting “additional research into the potential impact of an interaction between the MMR and thimerosal-containing vaccines on brain structure and function.”
A study from Japan’s Kinki University in 2010 supported “the possible biological plausibility for how low-dose exposure to mercury from thimerosal-containing vaccines may be associated with autism.”
A 2011 study from Australia’s Swinburne University supported the hypothesis that sensitivity to mercury, such as thimerosal in flu shots, may be a genetic risk factor for autism. (Critics call the study “strange” with “logical hurdles.”)
A Journal of Immunotoxicology review in 2011 by a former pharmaceutical company senior scientist concluded autism could result from more than one cause including encephalitis (brain damage) following vaccination. (Critics say she reviewed “debunked and fringe” science.)
In 2011, City University of New York correlated autism prevalence with increased childhood vaccine uptake. “Although mercury has been removed from many vaccines, other culprits may link vaccines to autism,” said the study’s lead author. (To critics, it’s “junk science.”)
A University of British Columbia study in 2011 that found “the correlation between Aluminum [an adjuvant] in vaccines and [autism] may be causal.” (More “junk science,” say the propagandists.)
A 2011 rat study out of Warsaw, Poland found thimerosal in vaccines given at a young age could contribute to neurodevelopmental disorders. (Proves nothing, say critics.)
A Chinese study in 2012 suggested that febrile seizures (an acknowledged side effect of some vaccines) and family history of neuropsychiatric disorders correlate with autistic regression.
A 2012 study from the Neurochemistry Research Marie Curie Chairs Program in Poland found that newborn exposure to vaccines with thimerosal (such as flu shots) might cause glutamate-related brain injuries.
In 2013, neurosurgeons at the Methodist Neurological Institute found that children with mild mitochondrial defect may be highly susceptible to toxins like the vaccine preservative thimerosal found in vaccines such as flu shots. (“Too small” of a study, say the critics.)
In 2016, Frontiers published a survey of vaccinated vs. unvaccinated children. The vaccinated had a higher rate of allergies and NDD (neurodevelopmental disorders, including autism) than the unvaccinated. Vaccination, but not preterm birth, remained significantly associated with NDD after controlling for other factors. However, preterm birth combined with vaccination was associated with an apparent synergistic increase in the odds of NDD.
Then, there’s a 2004 Columbia University study presented at the Institute of Medicine. It found that mice predisposed for genetic autoimmune disorder developed autistic-like behavior after receiving mercury-containing vaccines. (Critics say that’s not proof, and the work was not replicable.)
There’s Dr. William Thompson, the current CDC senior scientist who has come forward with an extraordinary statement to say that he and his agency have engaged in long term efforts to obscure a study’s significant link between vaccines and autism, heightened in African Americans boys. (The CDC says the data changes made were for legitimate reasons.)
There’s the current CDC immunization safety director who acknowledged to me that it’s possible vaccines may rarely trigger autism in children who are biologically or genetically susceptible to vaccine injury.
There’s the case of Hannah Poling, in which the government secretly admitted multiple vaccines given in one day triggered her brain injuries, including autism, then paid a multi-million dollar settlement, and had the case sealed from the prying public eyes under a confidentiality order.
There was the former head of the National Institutes of Health, Dr. Bernadine Healy, who stoked her peers’ ire by publicly stating that the vaccine-autism link was not a “myth” as so many tried to claim. She disclosed that her colleagues at the Institute of Medicine did not wish to investigate the possible link because they feared the impact it would have on the vaccination program.
There’s former CDC researcher Poul Thorsen, whose studies dispelled a vaccine autism link. He’s now a “most wanted fugitive” after being charged with 13 counts of wire fraud and nine counts of money laundering for allegedly using CDC grants of tax dollars to buy a house and cars for himself.
And there are the former scientists from Merck, maker of the MMR vaccine in question, who have turned into whistleblowers and accuse their company of committing vaccine fraud.

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2024.05.09 21:50 RedditVaccineInjury "What The News Isn't Saying About Vaccine-Autism Studies"

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2024.05.09 20:55 RedditVaccineInjury "What The News Isn't Saying About Vaccine-Autism Link"

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2024.05.06 23:12 Ihavenofslefttogive Path To Nowhere SFW Headcanons For Shalom, Part 3.

I Hate The Character Limit, so much.
Previous Posts:
Part 1: https://www.reddit.com/PathToNowhere/comments/1clu2tn/path_to_nowhere_sfw_headcanons_part_4_shalom/
Part 2: https://www.reddit.com/PathToNowhere/comments/1clu7gw/path_to_nowhere_sfw_headcanons_for_shalom_part_2/
35. She has joined several other Sinners in keeping an eye on the chief and making sure she does not overwork herself too much, with her method of getting her to stop being to simply walk into the office, grab her by the wrist, and pull her away from her computer and off to either of their rooms.
When that does not work, she will resort to decidedly more underhanded methods, such as slipping into the office via one of the hidden passages, putting her hands over her eyes and telling her that it is time to go to sleep as she waits for her to surrender.
Another option is to utilize the most tried and true method, that being the NHH method, which involves sicking either Nightingale or Hecate and Hella on the Chief, with said method ending in her either being drug out of her office by the Adjutant, often still in her chair, or being bullied into going to sleep by Hecate’s pleading and Hella’s cursing as she chews her out.
But should all of the above fail, should all seem lost in this endeavor, then Shalom has perfected a final tired and true method of forcing the Chief to relax, one that, during her first attempt almost ended with her becoming a head shorter courtesy of a rather infuriated Sumire.
The method in question?
Step 1: Walk into the office. Utilizing passages is not necessary as the sound of approaching heels clicking on the floor and knocking on the door adds a valuable psychological factor to the approach.
Step 2: Do not respond to any of the Chief’s questions, merely meet her gaze with a smile and walk towards her, navigate around her desk and push her back towards the wall behind her.
Step 3: Utilize greater than average strength to force her to remain in the chair by pinning her to ii, typically done by straddling her lap.
Step 4: Lean in close to her ear and begin to hum a lullaby as you stroke her hair, and rub her upper back, certain fragrance perfumes also assist in this method, particularly ones including lavender.
Step 5: Wait for her to give in and then wheel her out of the office and towards her room.
So far this method boasts the 2nd highest success rate out of her other methods of coercing the Chief into resting, the highest being the NHH method, though other Sinners boast of having more successful ones…granted one of them involves rendering her unconscious and another involves paralyzing her, but they still work, thus the Hush shall not stop until she perfects a method of getting the Chief to cease overworking herself.
Her current approach being to simply insure that there is no reason for her to overwork herself, with her providing aid on matters that would otherwise take up too much of the Chief’s time, though the Chief is yet hesitant to fully trust her with much of her work, she has so far allowed for the help.
Only time will tell if this method works though.
36. She has a curiosity regarding the various other nations that exist beyond the walls of Dis, something that has led to her gathering as much information and memorabilia from those nations that she is capable of.
She regularly searches out any of the Sinners from foreign lands to speak with regarding their former homes, such as Pacassi and her long vanished hometown, Eirene and Fraser, KawaKawa and Stargazer for WhiteSands, or OwO and Goldion Ville.
It has become a small dream of hers to one day visit the lands beyond the walls of Dis and see what the world is like outside of the reach of Paradeisos and herself, though she does not want to go alone, so she has decided that she will try and take Rosa, Rahu, Christina (and of course where christina goes, Thistle goes.), and or the Chief with her come the chance to slip away.
But for now she will settle with enjoying what trinkets and information she can from those distant lands. She is particularly fond of the chess set that Eirene had brought over from her home city and the paper lantern that OwO made for her.
37. Similar to Langley, she has many times made use of the skills of the Phantom Thief pair of Priscilla and Tetra, though she has never directly spoken to them, instead utilizing multiple online accounts and middle-men to hire them.
The pair have long since ceased attempting to investigate just who it is that is behind all of the jobs that Shalom has given them, their previous attempts having ended with the pair finding a flash drive tucked into a drawer that contained their…toys, during a rather passionate moment.
Their session of intimacy being cast aside as they investigated what was on the flash drive, the pair soon finding themselves clinging onto one another as they saw a file containing both videos and images of them going about their daily lives, as well as on their missions, even their homes outside of the Bureau, including safe houses even the Chief was unaware of.
Amidst the flurry of images and videos was a single document, a simple text file that contained words which managed to send a chill through their cores.
“I would advise you to not bite the hand that feeds you, I harbor no malice towards you at the moment…but if you continue to pry into things best left unknown…then I will be forced to take much more direct action against you.
The presence of this hard drive should be proof enough of what I am capable of, as well as the extent of my influence, and be advised that what you see here is but a fraction of the data I have gathered on the two of you.
But that is neither here nor there at the moment, and I would truly hate to sully the wonderful working relationship we have at the moment, and in the same vein lose two exceptionally useful allies, thus I will take no action against you at the moment.
For now, I would advise you to hold one another close, perhaps enjoy the wine you have stored away in your cupboard. It is a wonderful vintage that pairs quite well with the dark chocolate that Tetra purchased a couple of days ago.
Take some time off to process this information, don’t worry about anything, your superior at the Bureau is a kind woman, she won’t pry too much, and you have likely received a rather sizable transfer to your account for a job well done in regards to your last few missions from me.
With that said, I must be going, I have a great many things to attend to that require my personal attention, though before I go, I have to admit that I was impressed by the variety of toys you possess. My own collection seems paltry in comparison…perhaps I should remedy that.
Sincerely X.”
The pair would take their mysterious benefactors' advice and spend the next few days with each other, not only scouring their homes and cell for bugs, but also in trying to bury the terror that the flash drive caused them.
That the damn thing vanished the next day, only further heightened their fears of this unknown X.
Curiously, the days following this incident would see Shalom spend a rather lengthy amount of time browsing certain…illicit sites in search of new additions for her own collection, that she asked Rahu, Rosa (Who she communicated with via sharing her screen in a call or by phone), and the Chief their opinion on the objects in question, is something 2 of the 3 mentioned would very much like to forget .
38. Upon learning that Peggy and Joan were two of the musicians whose tapes and records she possessed, she took time out of her schedule to ask for their autograph’s on the tapes and records in question, paying them quite handsomely in return.
She has likewise requested recording of several other musician Sinners performances, from Dudu, who spent several minutes in dumbfounded silence at just how much Shalom offered her before energetically shaking her hand and running off to get started, to Echo and her saxophone, the young musician being ecstatic to record a tape for someone at last.
Whether or not the music is any good by the standards of the masses is of no concern to Shalom, all that matters is that it is her choice to listen to and enjoy it, and not the whims of her former masters, with it also serving a memento of some of the more vibrant souls present within the Bureau.
39. Given her fixation on spreading happiness, and Shalom’s desire for happiness, it is a fair assumption to say that she has something of a relationship with Serpent, with the serpentine Sinner having taken upon herself the challenge of making Shalom give her a genuine smile through any means necessary.
As a result of this, Shalom has many times found herself given a front row seat to the shows that Serpent puts on within the Bureau, the serpentine Sinner having pulled out every stop during her shows to try and coerce as much genuine emotion as she can from Shalom, with the Hush often finding herself feeling emotionally drained and yet deeply satisfied after each performance.
She has also met the monstrous snake that Serpent keeps as a pet, granted their meeting involved it slithering through the vents and into her room as she was reading a book, but unlike many of her fellows she did not immediately panic and was instead able to keep the colossal snake busy until Serpent could arrive to recover it.
Though it did take them a rather long while to convince the snake to uncoil itself from around her and her chair, especially given that it seemed to be enjoying the story she was reading aloud to it.
That is not to say it is an entirely one-sided deal, as Serpent has come to find herself with enough money in her account to be able to afford the sun lamps she has wanted for a long while, with Shalom also taking upon herself the duty of babysitting Serpent’s snake when the woman has to leave it behind on a mission.
She has also aided Serpent in her quest to make the Chief happy, not only through funding but also by helping her in researching a rather large variety of means to try and appease the woman in question.
The Chief has since come to expect that whenever Serpent has a show, she will find herself being seated near the front with Shalom on one side, Eirene on the other, and Rahu and Christina as far away from the giant snake that accompanies Serpent as possible.
40. She gets cold easily due to her fragile nature, her heavy coat helps her with it to an extent, but during particularly cold or windy days, she needs to wear layers to the point that she needs several minutes to pry off all of them when she is out of the cold, otherwise she will begin to overheat.
In addition to getting cold easily, she also has a rather weak immune system, even with Paradeisos medicine at her back, thus she can easily fall ill during cold weather, leading to her being bedridden or consigned to the medical wing for several days before her condition stabilizes.
As a result of this, she tends to avoid leaving the warmth of the Bureau, or even her room for that matter, during such weather unless her presence is requested by the Chief for some matter, though even then she will demand heavy reparations for her presence.
Typically, said reparations will involve the Chief pampering her while she recovers from whatever illness has come to plague her, even should she be given medication to treat it, she will still request that the Chief stay with her till she is fully recovered.
That is not to say she fairs any better during hot weather, as she has to wear sunscreen or carry an umbrella to avoid sun burns during the intense heat, with her trying to minimize her exposure to the intense sunlight as much as she can to avoid heat sickness.
It is safe to say that she enjoys the more mild weather of spring or the cool and yet not freezing weather of fall as opposed to winter or summer, with those being the months she is able to enjoy the sights of the city and the world before she is forced to flee into cover at the changing weather.
41. She once requested Enfer to make use of her ability to try and sculpt something that could elicit genuine fear from her, with the artist devoting a rather obscene amount of time and effort towards the matter, Shalom funding her ventures as the sculptor tried everything she could.
Eventually, Enfer managed to create something that managed to provoke a reaction from Shalom, the exact nature of the work that managed to provoke a feeling of unease and distress within Shalom such that she was visibly unnerved is unknown however, as Shalom had any visual images of the work removed as she took it to a secure and hidden space within her room.
None but the Hush and the Sculptor themselves have seen just what was made that day, and Enfer refuses to share any information on the matter, the Mistress of Fear herself feeling no small amount of unease whenever she recalls the work she made, and sheer distress it caused to flicker through the normally blank faced Shalom as she looked upon it.
No threat was needed, no promise of revenge or wrath, nor was a bribe needed, only a glance at Shalom and at the artwork she had made was needed to bid her tongue to stay silent on the matter.
An oddity is that after the piece was finished and hidden away, the pair tried to spend as much time with the Chief as possible, as though something compelled them to do so…perhaps…no, it is better that road be left unwalked.
42. She is a regular listener to Eleven’s radio show, and is exceptionally fond of the radio host herself, finding her show to be the perfect thing to listen to as she focuses on work that has either kept her up late, or has awoken her exceptionally early.
Eleven is more than a little wary of the Hush, especially given the rumors she has heard of the woman, particularly from the agents of the Garden and various others, though at the same time she cannot ignore the way Shalom has spoken so highly of her, and the several times she has called in to her show to speak with her whenever she needed to take a breather during her work.
That said, Eleven wishes that the next time Shalom asks to take her photo, she does not have the flash on, especially given that the mirror she was standing beside managed to reflect it and disorientate both of them for several minutes.
43. She very much enjoys sleeping in on the days she has nothing to do though not quite to the extent of Coquelic, who prefers to spend almost the entire day in bed when there is nothing for her to focus on, with her trying to catch up on any sleep she has been forced to miss as a result of her work.
Whenever someone attempts to awaken her from this slumber they will typically either be met by her Mark blazing in one of her eyes as she glares at them, or with her reaching out to pull them into bed with her, something that Rahu, Christina, Rosa, and the Chief have been the victims of before.
The problem is that once she has a grip on them, and has begun to fall asleep, she very much refuses to relinquish her grip on them, with her poor victims having to either wait for her to awaken, or for them to find some way to wake her up.
Such as carrying her to, and proceeding to drop her into a tub of either warm or cold water, something that Rahu had to resort to at one point when something came up and Shalom was needed on one of those days.
She proceeded to learn that while Shalom is frail, she is still capable of throwing surprisingly heavy objects with no small amount of force at someone, particularly when they have their back turned to her.
On an unrelated note, she had to see Iron and Anne for some aspirin to help with a headache she gained that day, where it came from she would not say, only that both the source of it, and the headache itself, were exceptionally annoying.
44. Shalom is not counted among the “Sane People Of The Bureau” as the group of Nightingale, Cinnabar, and recently Matilda is called within the Bureau by both staff and sinner, this is no small part due to her past as the Hush and her fixation on the Chief, along with the extremes she is willing to go to in order to achieve her goals.
That said, she is still numbered among the “Somewhat Sane People Of the Bureau,” along with the likes of Langley, Zoya, and so on. As while she may not be the most sane of individuals, with Shalom even confessing such a thing herself due to her skewed view on morals and how she was brought up by Paradeisos, she is still more sane than most of the staff and sinners alike and is thus a candidate for leadership and advice should any of the Sane People Of The Bureau be indisposed after something occurs to effect the Chief…or when the chief needs to be overruled and or forced to take a break.
45. She has a deep seated fascination with the Immortals (Dreya, Vanilla, and Mantis) due in no small part to their own contributions towards paving the way for Dis to be founded by Keylan during the expedition into the Perishing Star, along with the wisdom and knowledge they hold regarding not only the star, but also what they can recall of the world before Dis was founded.
This is one of the few point where she and Paradeisos are in agreement, the information the Immortals possess has already caused several breakthroughs in regards to how the Perishing Star is viewed, along with information regarding both Mania and the effect it has had on the environment of the land around the star.
As such, Shalom has been asked by Paradeisos to keep an eye on the Immortals and to help act as an intermediary to exchange information with them, especially in regards to the subjects of the Illusory Moon and it seeming intelligence, alongside of information of the old world that was lost during the years before the Expedition breached into the Star’s domain.
She tends to speak most with Dreya as opposed to Mantis and Vanilla, as she find the astronomer to be the easiest to converse with of the group as opposed to the survivalist and logistician, though she has orders to try and gather information from Vanilla due to her being a largely unknown part of the Keylan Expedition, alongside of her understanding of the temporal hellstorm that rages within the Star’s domain and her ability to help in reconstructing some of the ruined monitoring stations around 00.
46. Shalom was rather surprised when she learned that the Chief refuses financial backing and aid from her sinners, alongside of only taking Hella and Hecate with her on her missions, the latter annoying her much more than the former due to potential safety risks.
As a result of this, she is one of many that have brought up the idea of the Chief taking other sinners aside from just Hella and Hecate with her during missions as while she may have success so far with just the pair, she also has tendency to run into situations that heavier firepower would be greatly useful in contending with.
As a result of this, she and several others, including Langley, Eirene, Demon, and Rahu, have worked to put together a means of coercing the Chief to accept further aid on her missions from those who are capable of doing so, with the more contaminated and mania sensitive sinners having to be kept on the sidelines due to contamination and potential risk of going full maniac allowing for them to narrow the suspects down.
That they have even been able to sway Nightingale to their side is proof of their devotion to this cause, though so far they have had little luck in convincing the chief to accept further help…at least willingly as they have several times simply either pulled rank on her (Langley) or threatened her with withholding her coffee and snacks (Nightingale) if she did not take aid with her on some missions.
Shalom would go with the Chief on missions herself, if she did not feel that doing so would run the risk of allowing Paradeisos too much information on the Chief and potentially causing the both of them future headaches.
47. Despite her fragility, Shalom possesses rather impressive healing capabilities, though not to the extent of Hella, she is still capable of surviving many wounds that would have been fatal to others, with Schorl furthering her healing abilities with its own technology.
She cannot regrow limbs or digits, nor can she regenerate organs, or is she immune to illness, but she is still capable of taking a stab or bullet and surviving, at least assuming it is not directly to her heart or brain, something she considers one of the few useful modifications Paradeisos made to her after she became the Hush.
48. She has an odd relationship with subjects unknown to her, as she is both wary of, and yet also fascinated by, anything that she has know knowledge or comprehension of, something which is quite rare given her eidetic memory and the amount of information she was taught by Paradeisos and has learned on her own.
This leads to her starting ventures into unknown subjects cautiously at first as she tests the waters before she begins to dive into them in full, hungrily devouring anything and everything she can on the subject until she feels that she is satisfied with it.
This is not something born of scholarly desire, but rather out of a desire to know what she can use and what can be used against her, alongside of it being something that she has the ability to choose to indulge in without being ordered to do so, it is also something she does to further cultivate her seemingly all knowing image to instill both respect and unease in those around her.
Among the subjects she has studied are things such as tailoring, animal husbandry (Christina learned far too much regarding breeding habits of animals when she was researching it), entomology (She felt it wise to learn more about her arachnid foes), cooking, and cocktail making.
49. It is a standing rumor in the Bureau that Shalom’s coat is able to repair itself, as no matter what is done to it, be it burned or slashed, it is always in immaculate condition the next time anyone sees her wearing it.
The truth is much less fanciful though, as Shalom simply owns many copies of her coat that she can use when she is unable to fix one of them or have a tailor fix it for her, with her having allocated a rather large sum simply to replacing and repairing her coats when they get damaged.
She at one point had to have a whole new batch made for her as, despite not being contaminated when the Garden and Langley unleashed a hell of spiders into her room, she one day went to put on one of her coats and found a rather large tarantula inside of it.
How it got there, she had no idea, only knowing that it was the doing of someone in the Bureau, especially given she has spider-proofed her room to the best of her ability since the ‘prank’ pulled on her.
Needless to say, she promptly had Schorl burn each of her coats for safety reasons.
50. She is very well aware of the irony of her name's meaning and of her profession and the deeds she has committed, with her finding it to be somewhat humorous in a rather dark way, with her using it as a part of several rather dark jokes that she makes when free of Schorl’s gaze.
51. While Shalom claims to have something of a Black Thumb when it comes to gardening, few know just how bad her attempts at gardening have ended over the course of her attempts at it.
As not only has she managed to kill the vast majority of her own plants, including ones that should not be easily killable by any stretch of imagination, but she has also managed to, through means known to not even Paradeisos, cause plants that others are tending to on her behalf to die whenever she tries any attempt at caring for them.
She was particularly upset the day she managed to kill a rose that Rosa had given her, with the maid having to visit the Bureau to console her former employer over the matter, said maid would later confide to the Chief that the flower was artificial and it should not have been possible for it to die.
52. Shalom very much enjoys egging people on when the chance arises, utilizing her position as a Paradeisian and her own connections to put people who have managed to earn her ire in a position of wishing to strike at her, but being unable to do so.
In particular, she enjoys doing this to high ranking officials or such that try and interfere in her aiding the Chief, finding the expressions they make as they grit their teeth in silent and indignant fury at her to be amusing to no small extent.
She is confident that should anything occur, Rahu would protect her, though her bodyguard has told her many times to cease her antics or to at least reign in her antics so that she did not have to have her hands on her weapons everytime Shalom meets an official that annoyed her.
The only response she received from Shalom was an amused smile and the faintest hint of exasperation from Schorl as the Hush went to another meeting with a board of officials, said meeting nearly devolved into a full on brawl due to her pitting them against one another as she sat back and enjoyed the show.
It is safe to say that Rahu has come to dread seeing Shalom smile during meetings.
53. She has many times commissioned Cassia to make perfume for her, with her finding the perfumers products to be vastly superior to even the perfumes that she would find in luxury stores in Eastside.
A part of the deal she has with Cassia is an exchange of fragrances so to speak, as she will let the perfumer take samples of her hair to make into perfume in exchange for custom perfumes, though her donations to help Cassia built her own Atelier within the Bureau don't hurt either.
Cassia considers the perfume she has made from Shalom’s hair to be an oddity, not just due to it smelling of a form of flower she has not smelled before, her best guess being some form of lily, with a rather spicy undercurrent of something akin to cinnamon, but also the feeling of peace it seems to bring the one wearing it, though she claims the feeling of peace feels…unnatural to her.
The perfumer would work to refine the perfume made of Shalom’s hair for several months before she seemed to reach some form of breakthrough, though it did not seem to be a desirable one as she soon destroyed the product and went back to her earlier iteration of the scent.
Why she did so, she would never say, but the look of pity and unease in her eyes when she looks at Shalom since her experiment ended, tells a tale all of its own.
54. She finds Hella to be rather adorable, though she is admittedly somewhat envious of the sheer amount and depth of emotions the young Syndician can feel, along with the ease at which she is able to display and switch between them.
Nonetheless, she has come to be rather fond of the gremlin’s antics, with her considering it a pleasant interruption to her day whenever she sees the hellion causing chaos within the Bureau, with her having gone so far as to aid her in her escapes and antics for her own amusement.
She is also oddly protective over the Syndician, as she has come to the conclusion that Hella is a vital component to the Chief’s happiness, and a valuable means of keeping her safe, and as such she takes many steps to insure that the little hellion is safe during her outings.
Hella once confronted her on the matter, surprising Shalom with her awareness of her involvement, the pair speaking for a while on their thoughts on the matter, with the Rat Queen Of Syndicate surprising Shalom with her maturity and intelligence during their conversation.
In the end Hella agreed to endure her meddling and watch, in exchange for her monitoring and protecting Ninety-Nine as well, with the gremlin threatening Shalom with going to the Chief and ruining her image in the Chief’s eyes if anything happened to the Berserker.
Shalom had chuckled at the statement, an honest chuckle of amazed amusement at the girl's audacity, before she acquiesced to her demand with grace, smiling to herself as she re-evaluated her opinion on the girl who finished her tea before she left.
Before Hella had left the room, however, she had asked her how it was she deduced that it was her that was involved, something which made Hella pause before she turned to look at her over her shoulder and said-
“I had a hunch it was someone high up, didn't know who though, so I took a gamble on it being you and you confirmed it for me.”
Shalom had been incredulous for a moment before she began to chuckle once more, basking in both her surprise and the genuine emotion she felt as she watched the young woman leave, silently vowing to herself to see the full potential of the young girl one day.
55. And the final one, is that Shalom fully expects to never truly achieve her happy ending and to die before she can be fully free of the shadow of Paradeisos, to never be able to watch movies with the Chief, see Rahu freed from her hatred, watch as Christina and Thistle grow together, or witness Coquelic and her Garden claim their own pound of flesh from both the Underground and Paradeisos.
Because of this, everything she has done and continues to do is her rigging the board as much in favor of the Chief and those she feels deserve it as possible, all to insure that once she is gone they will still be safe and can reach their own happiness.
She knows that nothing she has done can make up for even a fraction of the sins she has committed, but at the very least she hopes that these sins can pave the way to heaven for her loved ones while she descends into hell where the Hush belongs.
She could burn with a smile on her face, so long as she knows they will be safe and happy.
And with any luck, she will drag Paradeisos down to the depths of hell with her, so that they can all burn along with the monster they created.
And that is it, everything we have for Shalom, and our longest post on this sub to date, we hope you all enjoy it and that you share your opinions and thoughts on what we have here, along with some of your own headcanons should you wish to do so.
Till next time, stay safe and take care.

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2024.05.06 23:03 Ihavenofslefttogive Path To Nowhere SFW Headcanons Part 4: Shalom

P.S. This is Tagged as spoilers for some pieces of infromation that may be spoilers for those who have not seen or done her interrogation or the Floral Unfurl and RainBurst Events. This is also the first post of mine to break the Character limit so I will be breaking it into two parts.
Link to Part 2: https://www.reddit.com/PathToNowhere/comments/1clu7gw/path_to_nowhere_sfw_headcanons_for_shalom_part_2/
Part 3: https://www.reddit.com/PathToNowhere/comments/1clua8k/path_to_nowhere_sfw_headcanons_for_shalom_part_3/
1. She has many times attempted to usurp Nightingale as the chief’s adjutant in an effort to get closer to the Chief, with her efforts ranging from subtle attempts to discredit Nightingale, to outright attempting to have her transferred to a different Agency, though these efforts have all been in vain.
She has since switched her efforts from removing the Adjutant from play, to making her into an ideal subordinate to aid the Chief and to use as a proxy for her own plans to benefit the Chief, herself, and the rest of the MBCC through a variety of means, some of which have left Nightingale adamant in putting a bullet in the head of whoever is responsible for them.
2. She does not like overly spicy food, something with a little kick is fine, but anything above that is too much for her, a weakness that Coquelic somehow figured out and used against her by lacing one of her meals with a notoriously hot pepper.
Shalom’s yelp of pain as the spice overwhelmed her, and the way her eyes had begun to water as she downed her entire drink before she asked Rahu to get her another one, is an image that has been immortalized in the halls of The Garden via several covertly taken photos and videos.
That the Garden found its flower garden in the Greenhouse dying barely a week later, in addition to the Chief being unable to get her hands on any additional flower seeds to replace the ones they had lost for several months afterwards was certainly just a coincidence…right?
3. She still has a soft spot for Christina despite past…incidents. And while she desires for Christina to make her own path, she still considers her to be her detective, and as such maintains a careful eye on her.
From keeping track of which cases she is working, the threat they pose to her detective, the people she socializes with, her newest interests, her family’s state of affairs, to the way she decorates her room, and so on, she feels at ease knowing that her detective is safe and sound.
She has made it clear to her detective that she will always be present to offer her help should she need it, granted her help tends to come with the requirement of Chris having to spend time with Shalom while she addresses her as ‘Big Sister Shalom’ during said time and allowing the Hush to call her ‘Little Sister’ as well.
As such she is never able to fight the smile that comes to her face when Christina needs her help, especially when she is able to use the chance to pamper her detective and see how far she has grown while on her own.
4. This suggestion came from EinarKaslana on Ao3, the credit for it goes to them.
That said, it is a shared headcanon between us that she is fond of photography, and maintains many photo albums throughout her places of residence, with specific people, such as the Chief, Christina, and Rahu, having entire albums devoted to pictures taken of them by the Hush.
That some of them were taken by cameras they were unaware of is neither here nor there to Shalom, and so long as they remain unaware of them, it will be nothing to them either…especially so long as they do not discover the albums that contain more candid pictures of them in various states of undress or in certain…compromising positions.
It is safe to say that those albums are among her most well hidden and well defended of treasures, with even Schorl being unaware of their location.
5. She has a soft spot for cats and dogs, often leaving out food for them or taking the time to pet and pamper them when she encounters them, as such she was one of the staunchest backers for the MBCC gaining an on site pound/shelter.
That said, she is also an avid fan of cat cafes having dragged Christina and Rahu to enough that they can reliably name the majority of the cat cafes in Dis off the top of their head, with but a few exceptions for those that have yet to have the Hush grace them.
She also tends to leave very sizable tips at said cafes, enough that the staff go out of their way to meet her expectations, and that they do not say a word about her gathering enough cats to cover herself and whoever is with her at the time in them.
6. Her room is surprisingly rather homey, with a number of bookshelves lining the walls, only broken up by small tables or wall fixtures with lamps and candles resting on them, an assortment of dark colored furniture, a large amount of flowers, both in pots on tables and hanging from the ceiling, and a rather sizable collection of horror related media.
She also has a large canopied bed that she has covered in enough pillows that many periodically fall off when anything jostles the bed, and a rather sizable amount of scented candles and incense scattered throughout her room.
Her main outfit of choice, along with several copies of her favorite coat, is kept in a dresser near her bathroom, while a much larger walk-in closet is dedicated to other uniforms and outfits that she has amassed over the years, though they are a subject for later on.
There is also a room that is hidden within her cell, a result of her machinations and of several deals made to allow her skills to be used to benefit the MBCC, said room being filed with a wall of monitors and terminals, a large number of filing cabinets rigged with incendiary devices that she can activate by tapping a button on her terminal, and a sizable amount of targets for her to focus her skills on.
She can never stop herself from chuckling everytime she enters the room, picturing the look on her former handlers faces were they to become aware that the Hush of Paradeisos, has become the Hush of Minos, granted said role is kept secret from the Chief, but it is the thought that counts…at least to her.
7. While there are many Sinners and staff within the bureau that adore Shalom, there are equally as many that hold in her both dread and contempt, be it because they know just Who she is, or because they feel that something is not quite right with her, some sixth sense warning them to avert themselves from aligning so closely with her.
Among those who hold her in disdain are Langley, who has seen enough of the mountain of corpses the Hush has built as an agent of Paradeisos to fully trust her, even with her devotion seemingly to have switched to her rookie.
As a result, the Spider has a special bullet with Shalom’s name written on it for the moment she feels the Hush has become more trouble than she is worth keeping around.
Another one that holds the Hush in contempt is Chameleon, the hypnotist being able to see through the mask that Shalom wears and finding the thing she glimpses beneath it to be of no small amount of concern, hence her own caution in regards to her.
Her trepidation regarding Shalom was only further cemented by the fact that the one time Chameleon attempted to use her power on Shalom resulted in her awakening in her cell with a migraine, a bloodied nose, and a letter reading- “Please, don’t try that again. I would hate to have to explain your loss to the Chief. Sincerely-Shalom”
Of course there is also the Garden and their own wariness of the woman to consider as well, as, while they do admit her actions allowed for them to escape the clutches of the Underground, her methods…have done their perception of her no favors.
Though they can agree with her desire to support the Chief and to safeguard their new home, it does nothing to keep them from having their eyes on her, and a blade marked with her name on it should she overstep her bounds.
While there are many more who feel wariness of the former Hush of Paradeisos, perhaps rivaled but by that of the former leader of Rustifre is that of her own former protegee and pseudo sister, Chirstina.
Having seen first hand just how ruthless her mentor can be, along with having gotten a glimpse as to the true nature of her work for Paradeisos, she has since found that while she yet has a fondness for Shalom, she can never feel as at ease in her presence as she once did due to what she has done, something which is bittersweet to Shalom.
8. She is one of a very select few to have actually beaten Eirene at both normal chess, and a specialized version of it designed by the Head Of Quinn, with her version of chess being something which involves multiple chess boards linked to a rotating table, where the players are playing multiple games simultaneously with but a few moments to make each decision and move.
Said game lasted nearly 12 hours, and ended with Shalom claiming a resounding victory with but minimal losses upon the other boards, a feat which has since earned her no small amount of fame within the bureau, even from her detractors, and a standing offer to play chess with Eirene whenever she wishes to.
9. While she is physically frail, especially for an S-Rank Sinner, she is still heads and shoulders above an average person in terms of speed, strength, and endurance, being as able of breaking bones with a punch as she is ruining someone's life with a few well placed whispers.
That said, she is surprisingly somewhat unaware of the extent of this strength, especially given that she is severely lacking in training for CQC and the usage of firearms and other weaponry, given her preference for remaining on the backlines and using the overwhelming might of Schorl to contend with any foe that gets in her way, and has thus not really had any reason to use it.
Yet even without training, she is still a capable threat should someone get in close, something which has lead to several sinners and staff seeing the surreal scene of her casually flinging a corruptor, that had somehow bypassed Schorl’s scanners, three times her size against a wall before it was vaporized by the aforementioned Paradeisian weapon.
10. She has gained a habit of messing with Schorl by putting stickers and such on it, something which the machine does not seem to enjoy given how it will try and find any way it can to remove the stickers or markings from itself the moment they are applied.
Shalom even once went so far as to write on the Paradeisian device with a pink marker, using it as a means of reminding herself of an appointment she had with Dr. Iron and Nurse Anne regarding her health, with the machine actually allowing the message to be written and to remain…at least until after her appointment, at which point it bore a hole through a water pipe and used it to wash itself off.
Similarly, she once brought up the idea of coloring the Schorl, with the machine and its operators adamantly rejecting the very concept of the idea, going so far as to destroy the can of paint and paint brush that she had purchased to do so before they scurried off.
11. She cannot drive. This is one of the few points of agreement the Chief and Paradeisos have ever been able to reach as Shalom’s driving can lead to no small amount of damage to the vehicle she is behind the wheel of, along with the sanity and health of her passengers.
The last time she attempted to drive she managed to make it a quarter of the way to her destination before Rahu and Christina, both of whom were holding on to one another for dear life, managed to convince her to switch with Rahu while Christina and Schorl spoke with the sherrifs regarding the collateral damage.
They were less than 3 minutes into what should have been a 9 minute long drive at the time.
12. She is fond of dropping by the Chief’s office and helping them with their work whenever the opportunity presents itself, something which has greatly endeared her to the Chief, and, albeit begrudgingly, Nightingale.
That she tends to leave each of these sessions wondering just how it is that the Bureau has not imploded in on itself or declared secession from Dis in some fit of mad lunacy, is something that tends to add some enjoyment to her day by trying to make sense of the insanity of the MBCC.
She has even gone so far as to compile many of the more interesting stories and reports into a personal collection to browse for her own entertainment whenever she feels the need for some levity.
To this day, one of her favorites remains the time that Emp managed to weave so elaborate a lie that it resulted in the FAC spending nearly 4 days investigating a ‘Duck Sinner’ that was responsible for the destruction of a power plant, with the Archer even managing to, albeit unknowingly, have Paradaisos waste several days investigating the same claim when it was relayed to them.
The true culprit of the Power Plant overloading was of course, EMP herself, though Shalom vowed to take that secret to her grave in exchange for the amount of humor her lie gave her.
13. Rahu once attempted to teach her how to use a conventional weapon for self defense, in the event that Schorl was destroyed or disabled and she was not present, only for the attempt to end with Christina having to get her hat repaired courtesy of the bullet ricocheting off of the target, off of the ground between Rahu’s feet, the ceiling above them, the railing of the shooting range, and then into the top of Christina’s hat.
That Langley had the audacity to not only laugh when she heard the report, but to then order Shalom not be allowed to touch any firearms in the Bureau has since been something of a sore spot for the Hush, especially since both Christina and Rahu aid the Spider in enforcing such a rule.
14. While her fondness for the horror genre of film has long been a well established trend in the bureau, with her appreciation for it in literature and art being similarly well known, her fondness for horror games is a relatively new obsession of hers.
Most of this fondness for the horror genre of gaming can be laid at the feet of Etti, who Shalom overheard running a horror themed tabletop session, EMP, who introduced her to horror anime as repayment for lending her a movie, and Nino, who she watched stream a horror game that caught her fascination.
Since then, she has devoured many horror games in terms of both playing them and watching them, with some of the games being of such disturbing levels that even Schorl was driven to escape the room to avoid the more disturbing scenes and gameplay.
That her new fascination has started a trend among the ones in charge of monitoring her via Schorl using the media she enjoys as a form of Test Of Courage, is something she is aware of enough to greatly enjoy.
With her fondness later extending to Tabletop games and the potential for horror and suspenseful storytelling within them as she learned of many of the horror campaigns that had been run by other DMs.
This being something that led to her approaching Etti to request her guidance on the matter, with Etti agreeing to help her DM a horror themed session, the young dragon all too happy to help a fledgling DM in the art of destro-*Ahem* creating an enjoyable session for everyone with minimal tears and screams involved.
That said session she ran resulted in Horo hiding under Zoya’s bed, Christina hiding with Thistle in a closet, Hella and Ninety-Nine refusing to leave their room without ear plugs on as they cursed her to hell and back, was something that lead to Etti declaring Shalom to be her new apprentice in the art of DMing.
The sheer panic that announcement caused nearly brought the Bureau to its knees.
15. Upon learning of Cabernet’s ability to materialize and consume souls, Shalom sought her out with a rather curious request, as she wished for the Franc Heiress to materialize a piece of Shalom’s own soul so that she could taste it out of her own curiosity.
After a rather lengthy debate with the Chief, and several tablets of aspirin, it was decided to allow the experiment of sorts to take place, with Cabernet materializing 2 pieces of Shalom’s soul as a pair of grapes, one being given to the Hush and the other being kept by the Glutton of Souls herself.
Cabernet would later remark that the taste was bizarre, as at first there appeared to be no flavor at all to her grape, only for her to be suddenly hit with an overwhelming bombardment of taste to such an extent she was nearly ill, the heiress later remarking to the Chief that beyond all of the myriad flavors there was something else…a feeling that was unnamable to her, yet left her feeling uneasy for many days afterwards.
Shalom would claim that she enjoyed the taste of the grape as well, though the true joy of the experience seemed to be an idea that had come to her as she would later approach the Glutton with an offer that she would request be kept between the two of them.
What was that offer?
Perhaps it is better off unknown if the way the Franc Heiress refused to leave her room for several days afterwards was anything to go by, and it is likely better still to not question why it is she seems to make a weekly tribute of a grape to the Hush, one that could not possibly have been made with Shalom’s own soul.
Indeed, it is better not to question what was said between the two.
16. She is still in regular contact with, and financially supporting, her former maid from her time at Erica Villa, Rosa.
The young woman having managed to somehow earn the fondness of the former Hush to such an extent that she has been working quite tirelessly to convince the Chief to allow for her to be employed at the Bureau, her main argument being that she could be of great help as part of any of the departments that need her…along with being another at least semi-sane and responsible person to help keep the MBCC in…relatively stable condition.
With each day she makes the argument to the Chief she wears her down more and more until she will be able to have her maid back at her side, and once more enjoy teaming up with her to make Rahu, and soon the Chief, as flustered as possible with their shared teasing.
17. She is not allowed any form of caffeine, a rule Paradeisos ‘forgot’ to inform the Chief of when Shalom was sent to the Bureau, with Rahu and Christina thinking the Hush herself or Schorl would have informed the Chief of this rule…only to learn that was not the case.
Indeed, the Chief learned of this rule when someone, she is willing to bet her life that it was either Hella or EMP, saw that the former Hush looked tired and offered her some of Summer’s Special Brew Coffee.
What happened next is something known but to those who were there that day and who managed to gain access to the security footage, something which was soon locked behind the highest grade of confidentiality that Paradeisos could create, with the files being further encrypted by Summer and Langley as well.
Any attempts at acquiring an answer from those who witnessed what happened that day would be met with nothing but a thousand-mile stare, with several others whimpering and curling into the fetal position or turning and fleeing as swiftly as they can, with none daring to vocalize just what happened that day.
All anyone knows is that a substantial portion of the bureau needed repair done to it, several officials that had been adamantly against the Chief and the MBCC had to resign from their positions in disgrace once certain information regarding them was leaked, along with a rather sizable amount of collateral damage being done to several major roadways and side streets.
Schorl has since been given permission to destroy any source of caffeine Shalom manages to get her hands on.
18. She has been utilizing her abilities to commune with the Mania Monster made of her discarded humanity known as Rebel in a bid to earn its compliance and to be assemble to utilize it to its fullest one day, her primary reason for doing so being something of an emergency measure should Paradeisos attempt to remove her from play along with having an emergency ace in the hole for rainy days.
That it could be an additional tool for the Chief and a means of further defending her should anything befall the Hush, the monster having long made clear its own deep seated adoration for the Chief to her during their…’Conversations’, is but yet another lie she has come to tell herself.
That she also wants to reconnect with her lost humanity and to try and bond with it is something she has tried time and again to deny even to herself, yet as time has gone by, and her emotions have begun to return to her, she has found it increasingly hard to deny her true reason for wishing to do so.
The truth of the matter…is that all of this is being driven by Her ability to feel the loneliness of that missing part of herself and her desire to end it and fill the gaping wound torn in her own soul all those years ago by Paradeisos.
All she truly wants is to feel whole again.
19. She has an odd relationship with Hecate, somewhere between an almost sisterly bond and that of a mentor, with the former Hush often volunteering to accompany the younger sinner into the field to act as a mentor to her, that she still unconsciously tries to protect her is something neither will directly mention to one another.
The pair have likewise somewhat exchanged hobbies with Shalom managing to get Hecate interested in the horror genre, while Hecate has managed to convince Shalom to take up sketching and, to a lesser degree, painting as a hobby, something the Hush has taken the somewhat relaxed leash and observation she is under during her stay in the bureau to thoroughly enjoy.
That most of her works feature the Chief, several even having her in a state of undress or in various…compromising positions, is something that only the Hush and Hecate, who happened to mistake her sketchbook for an empty one, knows of.
It is safe to say the following exchange was quite awkward for the pair, though they were eventually able to work past it and continue their regular sessions of shared artistic endeavor…with the addition of a rather bright tag to mark which sketchbook is Shalom’s.
In a similar vein, Shalom has taken a rather sizable amount of time in teaching Hecate how to think strategically and to plan for various scenarios, with the young Sinner having shown a marked improvement in her Dispatches as result of the tutoring, that the Chief saw fit to praise Shalom was simply a bit of icing on the cake to her.
That said, many Sinner feel no small amount of unease at the idea of the Hush having taken the Chief’s Shadow under her wing, especially given the uncanny similarities the pair seem to share, the only comfort most have been able to find in the matter being their shared loyalty to the Chief.
Though even so, most fear the idea of just what Hecate could become if Shalom is allowed to mold her enough, thus all of those within the Bureau tend to keep an eye on the pair whenever they are together and they can.
20. She has mapped out the vast majority of the secret tunnels that span the Bureau, particularly all of the ones that lead to the kitchens and to the Chief’s room, with her making use of them to not only be able to sneak away to the kitchen for late night snacks or when she needs a drink during her work, with her also using the tunnels to deliver snacks to the Chief and to surprise her when she is working.
She also makes use of them to avoid certain parties and to surprise others, with her usage of them having gotten to the point that a not so small number of Sinners and staff are of the opinion that she is in possession of some form of teleportation device.
That Shalom seems to find some humor in these rumors and even tends to encourage them through her own actions and inactions has likewise led to no small amount of confusion and unease among the Sinner population due to the potential threat she could pose with such a device.
The Chief has tried time and again to dispel these rumors, only for them to constantly re-emerge after enough time has passed, something which has led to the Chief and the rest of the administration staff of the Bureau nearing the end of their rope in regards to how to handle the spreading rumors, with Paradeisos offering no help on the matter.
21. She has found something of a way to utilize her “Mark” in tandem with the Chief’s Shackles, a method of piggybacking off of the Shackles and utilizing her ability in a way that makes it considerably less obvious towards both the recipient of the ‘Mark’ and the Chief herself that one is under the Hush’s influence.
Even with this loophole removing her need for direct eye contact with her targets among the Sinners, it still requires for the targets to be in a heightened emotional state, and for the Chief to not be aware of her actions due to her ability to sense the influence through the Shackles and throttle it before it truly spreads.
The knowledge of this influencing power is strictly confidential so as to prevent any panic from spreading among the Sinners, especially among those who have prior experience with the Hush and her power., with the Chief having further heightened her security around the Hush, despite her claims of only wishing to use her power to aid the Chief.
That said, the loophole has a further weakness in that Sinners of strong enough will, or those who are particularly Contaminated, such as Nox, Dreya, and so on, can not only resist the influence of the Mark through this loophole, but can also somewhat retaliate against it, causing Shalom a sizable amount of pain when they do so, Nox’s own retaliation leading to her having a severe nosebleed and being near catatonic for several hours.
The final weakness of this ability is that she requires time to focus on the Shackles, and the slightest of disturbances can interrupt her ability, with contact with the chief being an additional means of furthering her power’s stability, though since this loophole came to her awareness she has made certain to be on her guard around her the vast majority of the time.
A final note is that by some means she has been able to keep this development secret from Paradeisos, using it as yet another tool in whatever schemes of rebellion she harbors against the organization.
22. She has given Thistle the equivalent to ‘The Shovel Talk’, with the exception of her talk involving her simply sitting in silence for a while as she looked Thistle in the eye, smiling as a triangle Mark flared in her eye as an unspoken warning of what awaits the assassin if anything befalls Christina.
Thistle’s reply simply being to lift up her sword and set it alight with her own silent vow, that should any of the Hush’s schemes cause harm to the detective, she would not live long enough to enjoy whatever form of victory she managed to achieve.
That the Hush has the audacity to smile at her actions a low chuckle slipping past her lips as she finished her tea before rising and walking past the assassin, pausing but to ruffle Thistle’s hair with an amused glint in her eyes as she left the assassin, only caused her to further despise the woman even if they could agree on protecting Christina.
That Thistle collapsed back into her chair as she fought to control her heart beat and suppress the adrenaline tearing through her body after Shalom had left the room, is something that she will deny ever happened that day.
23. She has met Christina’s step sister several times, each time ending in her being chased out of the house courtesy of the wheelchair bound girl either throwing objects at her or swatting at her with something as she tells her to stay away from Christina.
That said, she has not stopped her attempts at somewhat courting the young woman’s favor, having arranged for, and personally done, many things to make life easier for the young woman, such as aiding in her finding a stable source of income from home, and ensuring that she and Christina are able to visit whenever they wish.
Even with all that she has done however, the young woman still does not trust her, and does her best to try and mitigate any influence Shalom has over her, that said, she does appreciate Shalom’s efforts and has at least allowed for them to chat for more than 30 minutes before she starts chasing her out of her home.
24. While Shalom can be said to have a rather refined palate, she does also have a taste for more simple foods as well, especially given that Paradeisos did not allow her to indulge in them before due to her needing to maintain an image as their Envoy and their close monitoring of her.
As a result of this, and the somewhat increased freedom she has at the Bureau, she has gained the habit of searching for small hole in the wall restaurants and such to dine at with the Chief, Rahu, or Christina, with her having gained a reputation as an exceptionally generous patron.
More than once, Rahu has been caught off guard by seeing staff greet the former Hush by name and show her to her favored seat in the establishment, one time of note involving a rather portly chef who was easily double Rahu’s own size and weight leaving the kitchen to greet Shalom with an embrace as he sat her down and spoke with her for a little bit before going to cook her meal.
She has even tried some of the more exotic foods brought back by Wolverine from his hunts, such as the meat of Sand Worms, which she claims has an oddly gamey flavor to it that is not that unpleasant, and a form of lizard that she actually quite liked the taste of, much to everyone’s shock.
That said, she did refuse to even look at the scorpions and other multi-legged insectoid like creatures the Hunter caught, due in part to a reason that will be touched on below.
To Be Continued in Second Part due to 40,000 character Limit.

submitted by Ihavenofslefttogive to PathToNowhere [link] [comments]

2024.04.23 00:54 Ykk7 2024-04-23

As a separate question, (Sorry I have some more questions! :) )

The accident was when I was crossing the street.
The moment of the accident was when I was crossing the street.
The sunset was when I was crossing the street.
The question is when he knew that.
The real question is how he knew that.
The real question is when he knew that
The man in the cafeteria who is taking a phone call is my father.
I'm referring to the man in the cafeteria who is taking a phone call.
I'm referring to the man in the cafeteria taking a phone call.
If aspirin will ease my headache, I will take a couple tonight instead of this horrible medicine.
I think I will warm some water for tea if you will excuse me.
If I should see her tomorrow, I will ask about her trip.
When I can swim, I will join the team.
If I may offer some advice, I suggest you reconsider your decision.
When I could finally understand the math problem, it felt like a huge achievement
If you could help me with this project, I would greatly appreciate it.
I would consider your offer, provided that you could guarantee delivery by next week.
Please let me know when you could meet me for lunch
You have likely been injured.
You have been likely injured.
I don't know that which is better
I don't know which is better
I don't know that which he bought.
I don't know which he bought.
I am not sure that which is better.
I am not sure which is better
I am not sure that which he bought.
I am not sure which he bought.
I am not sure why.
I will go jogging tomorrow when there are no cars in the streets.
I will go jogging tomorrow, when there will be no cars in the streets.
I will go jogging tomorrow, the time that there are no cars in the streets.
I will meet her the next day, the time she is arriving from the US.
I eventually found my phone in the refrigerator, which is where I lose things when I’m especially frazzled.
The party, when I met her, was unforgettable
I'm thinking about the day, when she passed away.
To learn a new language is my goal for this year.
If you would kindly review the report, I’ll be able to submit it by the end of the day.”
I can proceed with the project, provided that you would allocate additional resources.
Please let me know when you would like to schedule our next meeting.
I appreciate your prompt response when you shall have a moment to discuss the proposal.

Q1) Are 1-41 above all correct English or at least acceptable English?
Q2) As for 21 and 23, I used the bold parts, as a whole, as the objects of the verb "know". If so, are 21 and 23 wrong?
Q3) As for 21-28, are 21-28 still correct English or at least acceptable English even if "which one" is used instead of "which"? And even with the change, is your answer to Q2 still the same?
Q4) As for 1-6, does the bold parts modify the verbs "was" in sentences 1 and 3 because 1 and 3 doesn't make sense if they modify the subjects "The accident" and "The sunset", but the bold parts modify and describe the subjects "The moment of the accient", "The question", and "The real question" in sentences 2, 4, 5, 6?
Q5) If so, is this example "No one may wear shorts to school. The exception is when there is a party" also correct English? If so, does "when there is a party" modify and describe the subject "The exception", but not the verb "is" because the when-clause refers to the time related to the exception?
Q6) What do 1 and 3 mean in other words?
Q7) As for 7,8,9, do all the bold parts modify "The man" and "the man" even though the bold parts are somehow far away from "The man" and "the man", which the bold parts modify?
Q8) Like in 7, 8, 9, is it possible and done by native English speakers for a relative clause like "who is taking a phone call" or a participle phrase "taking a phone call" to modify a phrase or a clause that is far away from the relative clause and the participle phrase?
But can it lead to confusion sometimes without any clear context?
Q9) As for 10-18 and 38-41, like in 10-18 and 38-41, can the auxililary verbs like "will, would, shall, should, can, could, might, may" be used in if-clause, when-clause, provided-clause or in any clause?
Q10) As for 19, does "likely" modify "been", but as for 20, does "likely" modify "injured"? Are both 19 and 20 the same in meaning? and even though the placement of "likely" is put at the front of or at the end of 19 and 20, are both edited sentences 19 and 20 still the same in meaning as the original and still correct English?
Q11) As for 29, is "why" the object of the adjective "sure"?
Q12) As for 31, 32, 33, 36, do the bold parts all, as appositives, modify or refer to the phrases "tomorrow" , "the next day", "the day"? So, are the bold parts used as additional information to "tomorrow" and "the next day" and "the day"?
Q13) As for 30, 31, 35, can the bold parts be anlayzed as modifying either the entire sentences 30, 31, 35 or just the verbs "go/go jogging/jogging" and "was" ?
Q14) Is there any difference in meaning between 30 and 31 according to the when-clauses in bold are set off by a comma or commas? I just found a website explaining that there is a difference in meaning according to whether the bold parts are set off by a comma or commas. In 31, the bold part is analyzed as additional information since it's set off by a comma, and even in 35, the bold part is analyzed as additional information. If so, is the meaning of 35 different if the bold part is not set off by the commas?
Q15) As for 36, even if there is no comma that sets off the bold part, does the bold part still modify "the day"? and is there no change in the meaning of 36?
Q16) As for 36, are both sentences "I'm thinking about the day that she passed away" and "I'm thinking about the day she passed away" correct English? Is it okay to omit "that" or "when" ? and is it okay to use that-clause like "that she passed away" to modify "the day" instead of "when-clause" ?
Q17) Are both sentences "The fact that you’re always willing to help others makes you a kind-hearted person" and The fact you’re always willing to help others makes you a kind-hearted person" correct Englih or at least acceptable English? In the second sentence, "that" is omtted, which was connected to "the fact".
Even so, is the second one acceptable? and are both the same in meaning? and do both "that you're always willing to help others" and "you're always willing to help others" modify and describe "The fact"?
Q18) As for 37, is the infinitive phrase as a whole the subject in sentence 37? If so, is it possible to use an infinitive phrase and a gerund phrase as a subject in a sentence? If so, does "my goal" describe and modify the subject "To learn a new language" ?
Q19) As for 37, does "for this year" modify "my goal"? or can "my goal" also be analyzed as modifying the entire sentence 37 or the verb "is"?
Q20) As for 37, can "for this year" actually be put at the front of or in the middle of sentence 37 when "for this year" is set off by a comma or commas? But in that cause, is "for this year" only be analyzed as modifying the entire sentence 37 ? or the verb "is"?
Q21) As for 21 and 23, if "which is better" and "which he bought" are set off by a comma, are 21 and 23 correct English since "which is better" and "which he bought" are just additional information that refers to "that"?
But I actually used the bold parts as a whole the object of the verb "know" by treating "that" as leading a clause that contains "which is better" and "which he bought". In this case, maybe is only 21 correct but 23 wrong?
Q22) When I use "which" or "what" or "whose" or "who as leading a clause, is it wrong to add "that" like in 21 and 23?
Thank you very much!

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2024.03.27 07:37 obblonge Laura's Story, Part One

Waves.
Sometimes things propagate as waves.
She found this moth(rat?)-eaten manual fromma time not ours that mentioned this. That was before the invaders came. It may as well be centuries ago. There were stores that sold candies then. Wrapped in cellophanes of every color of the rainbow. What I'd give for something sweet now...
The sky is grey. Its always a shade of grey now. Sometimes lighter, during the day, I guess, orran ashen smeared easel offan irrational pantheon of uncaring gods and goddesses. We've been walking in what we assume is the same direction for at least two weeks. Following the river, keeping it to our left. At least we know we're not walking in circles. There's always an unnatural sound, like a sweeping broom across the tiled entranceway to Hell, that is present over the rushing water. Maybe that's why we stay close to the flowing - it almost blocks out the new world we have found ourselves in. Some semblance offa documentary on nature we might have seen when young and entertainment and learning were possibilities. There aren't many animals anymore. The ones that catch our peripherals are as ashen as the sky. Funny. I don't recall seeing foxes before; not in person. How long have we really been picking our way along this rocky terrain?
Laura is ahead of me, carrying a long bamboo walking stick. Sometimes when I lie and smile I tell her that's sposta help one walk. She lies and smiles back that of course its helping her walk - if I keep it horizontal it functions assif I'm onna tightrope - look, I'm inching between downtown skyscrapers!
An explosion in the distance, probably building sized. Sounds don't travel as far as they used to. All the greyness that came with Them is heavy, a wet blanket on the Earth, makes breathing a chore if one pays attention. The last buildings we saw were three-quarters immersed in the river. What is this body of water called? How does one forget what the local river is named? The same way one forgets what one's first car was, or where one's first kiss took place. Drive-in? Couch? Under bleachers? The explosion must be far enough to not be an immediate concern. No underfoot rumblings. We barely look up, in fact. We decided that attempting to track our progress in terms of direction was boring and pointless. Its not assif there issa goal we're reaching, a dot onna map that hassa printed name next tooit. In fact, the farther away we stay from those former dots on maps the better. Out here in the Great Big Fucking State Park of Wherever The Fuck We Are its peaceful enough. No former right angles to remind us that there are no straight lines in nature. Can't remember the last time I waited forra red light.
I'm catching up to Laura, she's crouching, long stick still horizontal, picking at something on or in the ground with her sawtoothed machete. There's no movement in the treeline except the branches and leaves themselves. Birds are almost non-existent now. I swear I don't ever recall seeing a fox in the flesh before, now they're the most common animal besides us. As I reach the limestone platform she spins, triumphant, see-I-told-you-the-stick-works, and holds out a bottle of Jamaican Red Stripe, looking new and shiny. Her excavation has unearthed a blue and white Igloo cooler chest from between boulders. Its full of formerly imported beers, a couple of red wax-encased wheels of cheese and luckily unopened large packets of bison jerky.
Back when people milled like ants, endlessly constructing ventilation tunnels and waste depositories, they believed things. They had up to the minute holy documents crisscrossed with squiggly imaginary lines, like all holy documents. Wherever one found oneself in relation to the imaginary lines denoted certain realities. Foxes are more common than people now. Somewhere Walt Disney is not feeling irony. Sometimes those holy imaginary lines were rivers. People's most common trait was laziness. I remember viewing a satellite picture of Earth, and it seemed the only blue water left was that being fed the indigo stain for denim inna polluted tributary adjacent in what was China. So much holiness. When the need arose for things bigger than us to assist, those holy worshipped things, they remained as invisible and ineffectual as ever. The larger than our imaginations entities that did show themselves remained indifferent to our collective sigils and crossed hearts. These giants brought with them a new Art, a new way to draw lines on maps, and new definitions of what maps were. Blue is still the least common color of water, brown and red being much more favored. Faces old and young stare accusingly from just beneath the surface tensions now, no matter what the hue of the liquid. The Earth is somehow a quieter marble now, explosions less frequent. If one were being charitable one could say the new, gigantic forms had brought peace, finally, at last. The answers to so many prayers.
Light pollution is now an antiquated term. Sagan's billions and billions twinkle sparkle flash and swoosh above our heads now if our relative elevation to the sea is great enough. I am no eidetic astrologer, but Laura agrees that Orion's belt and Betelgeuse are no longer where they were. Or maybe obscured by clarity. Perhaps eventually we'll draw new imaginary lines in the night grey and link humanistic tragedies to them. That one's Boffo, the legendary fox masturbator, see his right hand has six fingers? And there's Yourmom, still popular as ever. Some of the stellar regions make audible strings of intermittent noises, attempting to ask our obsolete fax machines tooa matinee. At least they're not selling us used cars yet. I wonder, would that make us scramble nowhere faster or drag our feet? The dead do not walk the globe. Hooded skeletons do not ride pale horses in search of wheat fields. It is possible something with many arms dances to an idiot piper. We smoke 'em if we got 'em, and we usually do. Drugs were big business, and are more commonly laying around than cans of cranberry sauce. They brought peace on Earth with Them, and an end to poverty, however one measures it. And they didn't even demand praise.
We haven't seen any other people in at least two weeks. Not alive, anyway. Most of the corpses are floating in pieces unidentifiable down past us. Any former homes by the waterfront have been abandoned. Proximity to the new vast creatures does something to the thought processes. Makes the electrons jump track and wind up in the wrong brain receptors. They're not eating us. They're not even interacting with humanity unless we en masse attack them. Nukes were used. That was the last Laura and I heard. The largest groups of people we've seen were four, across the river. They made no sign of recognition, no waves or yells. A mutual noticing. They were headed the way we came, on the other side.
We've stopped at a two story home with a boatless dock. A fire has turned the former garage into ash, but the adjacent kitchen and walk-in pantry is still full of groceries. Sandwich creme cookies with evaporated milk on the master bedroom deck. Sheets still smell like scented detergent and the water still gurgles from the faucets when they're turned. No electricity. Those electrons don't do the same things either. The long drive leading up to the structure is buried under massive fallen pines. Debris clogs the river itself, using a boat seemed useless, as if there was a destination to speed away to. Laura calls it " Fort mumbleblarrg " , exhaustedly burying her head in a couch cushion laid out on the deck. I stuff more cookies between my teeth. The view provided of the terrain from the deck looks like an angry child shook the ant farm, and bored, tossed it away inna drainage ditch outside a seafood buffet inna resort town. My skin imagines it has been coated in egg and floured batter several times. Shaking the sludge off my head I collapse on the unmade bed by the sliding glass, very seriously stained doors.
[ they severed the hands that's what the Spaniards did. Halberded piles palms up
fires not cauterizing, smudging
glints of spittled grin thick lenses calloused fingers zipping up weatherbeaten
blood, from not yet a teenager
cotton briars, green bitterness
whens
please not again]
Fort Mumbleblarrg seems as good as any place to experience intense hallucinations and/or time slips and/or simultaneous dimensional realities. It has cookies. After dragging all the usable foodstuffage up to the master bedroom suite atop the remnants of the wooded structure and making use of the handily, almost obscenely organized tools to actually um, fortify the narrow stairwell, we immediately crash near comatose for days, ingesting sugars and fats like there were supermarkets with humming freezer sections on every city intersection. This place even has a wine cellar, a real one, not a glass doored cabinet. I am almost disappointed there is no cask of Amontillado.
On the fourth day another explosion, still far enough to not feel blasted heat or earthquaking floorboards, but it trails along with it a visible atmospheric channel that spins off like the arm offa hurricane. For hours all the colors in the spectrum become grimy, unctuous, the view from the bottom of a fast food fryer overdue for straining. Nausea sets in during and afterward. All offa sudden being onna carpet is the same as lying face down inna two-inch-deep tray of cultivated maggots, complete with crawling movements up the walls and greenish-grey waves lighting up the flatscreen of the now-defunct television across from the bed. Huddled in the center, trying desperately not to touch or even look at the floor while convulsively emptying our bowels and stomachs, the moldering lightshow starts to produce three dimensional effects, coming closer then sinking in far past the wall its mounted on.
Blankness. Grey. Millipedes. Water still runs, still looks clear. All of the carpet gets torn out and heaved over the deck's railing, along with the sodden mattress. Mumbleblarrg wassa perfect title, man. From the deck a three-foot-wide stripe is clearly visible across the landscape. Straight from our perspective, disappearing into the horizon, a charred, still smoking narrow strip of burnt. Trees that formerly stood in its path are simply gone, not piles of twisted branch stubs and ash. Gouges in the limestone, an actual scraping it seems. Smell of overripe, rotting fruit, something exotic like ugli or dragon with an artificial sweetener aftertaste in the nostrils; acrid, bulbous decay accelerated by molecular science students proud of their work. Evidence of this is visible in the river itself - a darkened stripe underneath the waterflow which now eddies at the banks. Added to the evidence of former civilization already present in the water are the carcasses of fish, or fish-like creatures, at least. It is difficult to discern what the original shapes of the savagely torn chunks of flesh might have been. The entire column of moving water is black and brown and maroon and bright fire truck red. There issa small fire burning on the opposite shore. Impossible to tell what exactly, just a blur of burning. For the moment there is a wind, steady, away from us. Blessedly, away from us.
Laura usedta tell stories about being born onna side offa river I was not. I was born on an Air Force base in Texas. This is not that river. It doesn't look familiar to either of us. We don't know what its called, or was called. I had lived in Texas for all but four of forty-three years. I have never seen a fox except on screens, maybe a billboard. Now they're like neighborhood dogs. The trees, the grasses, they're familiar, but not intimately so. What are all these foxes eating? What stopped eating all the foxes and let their population burgeon? Laura says since that last wave she has a scar missing. It was to the side of a bone in her wrist, she got it while working inna field with her mother assa child. I don't remember for sure - its not my wrist, but I believe her. Neither of us can relate to the other how we got here, and when we attempt it again the story breaks down at maybe a different point. The last memory we have that stays the same is that we were both inna friend's car driving up to the convenience store a mile from my parents' old trailer. Then... Even when telling our own stories over again they change. At least that's what the other person claims.
There is plenty of packaged, indestructible food left. Some of the vintages are over sixty years old. We start on those just because. I stick a sewing needle through one of the corks and float it inna bowl of water. It doesn't seem to do anything in particular, which means I've probably forgotten a step in compass making. Best as I can tell we're headed vaguely north. Absolutely nothing I have observed points definitively to that conclusion. For now this is as good a place as any.
Contrary to most horror movie logic there are several battery powered devices fully charged, more or less, and picking up all kinds of stations. Allot of them are preprogrammed and safeguarded against any possibility that silence could happen, lest our listeners disappear. There are no live voices, though even the public station is replaying an interview with a United Nations ambassador intermittently with blocks of humming where the local station breaks would be. Neither of us recognize any of the station call letters or frequencies. Even the fifty thousand watt WOAI transmission is absent. Quickly we settle on the classical public broadcast, coming in surprisingly clear. It is the only one playing music without lyrics exclusively. It helps make all the alien noises more tolerable. When stars are visible focussing one's attention on a certain grouping will now cause them to actually respond - both with sounds and visual effects. Its not just our poor human senses - recordings on our phones document the phenomena in even greater detail. Clear enough skies to see past the grey are rare, but at least two infinite directions yield beautiful results. I name them after Greek sirens in my head, not wanting to be outwardly anymore pessimistic than the situation demands. Most stars are silent and stationary enough. For now. There is still one sun in the sky that seems to do the same thing it used to, even though its greyed out usually. Maybe tomorrow it will offer two scoops of raisins.
And. Aspirin in the aftermath of wine. We've been here four or five days and just now notice that there are no identifying traces at all of who once lived here. No photos framed. No mail magnetted to the refrigerator door. No kids' homework, or children's toys at all. There are true crime and mystery novels. No religious items. There are also no clothes hanging in closets or folded in drawers. Like we interrupted the crew dressing the set.
The audio stream changes from madrigals to Gregorian chants. Its still less memory invoking than pop songs of love gained and lost and sex. We've noshed through most of the sugars and salts and fats and have begun opening cans of vegetables and beans. Laura reminds me she's a Mormon and I pick up the old argument that no, she is not. My father attended a seminary in Michigan to become a priest before he joined the Air Force assa chaplin and married a paranoid schizophrenic, what the Roman Catholic church labels a possession case officially. I like to get drunk and talk about religion and politics. When I carried a wallet it contained separate business cards for ghost and demon removal services. My reasoning being that demons are way more dangerous than the cranky old fartbag of Aunt Mabel bitching about your choice of cat food for Mr. Snuggles, and should be priced accordingly. My first official girlfriend assa teenager working at Wendy's wassa Mornon, so I have slightly more than a cursory familiarity of the doctrine. Worst girlfriend ever, by the way. Never kiss a girl who doesn't smoke. Its okay if she doesn't smoke anymore, but this advice, I contend, will not let one down if heeded. As the topic of baptizing ancestors breaches again the sky visible past the open sliding glass door abruptly shifts from grey to palish green. Notta seafoam orra seasick orra pea, but a shade reserved for floors of state mental hospitals, disinfectant ready and climbing the edges of the walls. There is something else that is different. Laura and I exchange searching looks, interrupted in our comfort food conversation. We sit staring at each other forra solid minute before knitting our eyebrows and proceeding out on the deck. The atmosphere is physically thicker past the doorframe. Not more humid - the air is cool and moist, but no more so than before. Heavier. Gravity is still a theory. Although we confidently launch rockets and probes and parasail we assa species are still uncertain as to whether gravity issa push orra pull. Gravity now feels like its the ocean, waves jostling in all directions. A propagating wave packet, my head insists. I can't hear the rushing sound of the river. At all. Nor the wind visibly moving the branches strung above. The radio is unaffected. I am not. The last thing I remember when I awake is opening my mouth, partially full of cooked peppered yellow squash, and screaming. Silently.
[ thousand segmented legs crawling
the monsters took her under cover of sunlight and treason I can't remember what she was wearing
rough hewn metals jagged under nails into nerve-riddled flesh, rusted dirt filled channels
you were there to nurture but instead you consumed until bloated and gaseous
unstable at this temperature NO!
claimed divinity with hives and fever, royal pink and chartreuse
steaming exhalations horses breath
they spasmed fits and palsy
perspiration to the soil
which grew poisoned flowers from their tears
the limb twisted before the hinged joint borne unto the Firmament unmade
flutes whistling graveyard breezes
sounds are vibrations
sinusoidal dips and troughs and peaks and valleys
how many decimalled hurts?]
There issan aching in the back of my skull. No cartoon birds and stars halo. Rising from my face-up prone position on the freshly painted deck, Laura is first in my field of vision, back solidly pressed against the railing, her eyes wide and staring. Settling next to her while rubbing my nape, I dig in my pocket and fish out Ann's antique silver cigarette case. Taking two Camels out I offer one widdershins, quickly accepted. The black and gold lazer etched Zippo fails to click when struck but lights both. Baroque woodwinds and harpsichord is quarteting through the filthy sliding glass doors. It is the only sound. I dreamt of my daughter Kallisti. I have no idea where she is or if she is. Burnt ash drops without crackles, being shaken off by my trembling lips. Hot tears are streaming down, blurring the soundless vista with eloquent soundtrack. I haven't seen Kallisti since she was eight. She would be ten now. Her mother abandoned us when she was two anda half, chasing heroin and cocaine with prostitution and psychopathic apathy. I don't remember dropping the finished butt or crawling to the pallet on the floor underneath the speakers. Batteries still holding out. Harpsichord and oboes give way to four cellos, dirge. Its suiting of the moment. Red wine has not helped the aching of my head. Laura's face is turned from my view, surveying silent scenery fit forra hotel wall painting. This is where you could be instead of MotorLodge #164. There is no chocolate mint on your pillow. Do not use blacklights in the vicinity of your bedspread, please and thank you. End of song, end of consciousness.
Floor shakes hard enough to propel me to my feet. Wagner's Ride of the Valkyries is blasting through the speakers, but its too loud, absurdly loud, there's no way cones that size could make that much air move. Fuck this. Quick steps and noiseless slamming of the glass door. Thankfully the music diminishes in volume somewhat with this action. Its nighttime now. Laura is standing at the railing, one hand gripping the wood with enough force to turn her knuckles white, the other solidly around the ornate neck offa wine bottle labelled in Portuguese. She turns her head, frowning, only slightly, acknowledging my presence, then returns her sentry's position to the heavens. Half of the grey is parted centrally, revealing the new map of burning stars. Tens or thousands of minutes later Wagner dissolves into what would have been a station break, now the amplified buzzing offan ultraviolet bug zapper with two dragonflies struck frying in the mesh. This allows the only other sounds audible through to our senses: sirens calling from beyond Earth, skyward. A sort of synthetic chime set, microtuned at random and played by feasting vultures onna weighted keyboard. There is something new this time - a long, lilting, occasionally harmonized chorus of voices drifting in and out from a different point of night than the chimes, almost sideways from the horizon. If it is a language it is none I recognize, though there are definitely parts repeating verse-chorus-verse. Many vowels, few consonants. Hours pass. The buzzing from the radio fades to nothingness leaving us with the calling of the stars. The chimes span about two octaves. The voices, if that's what they are, full spectrum. There are most certainly repeating themes, though mismashed between competing chorales. All of the voices are distinctly female, the epitome offan archtype of warrior class. A third distinct group sounds angrier than the first two, threatening. No, bitch, our dance moves slay your tired, weak-ass trots. Its beautiful, as much as it can be, but my ears are accustomed to atonality. Also very directional. The voices are coming from horizontal sources, maybe on the planet, while the chimes are beaming from a gyrating cluster of suns directly above our heads. I find that I don't care how my dehydrated body feels about this decision: I am getting as drunk as I can before a red graped woman's hand closes the staring eyes of my corpse.
" There is nothing new under the sun " somebody said once. Probably a guy. That's the kind of smug bullshit men get quoted saying. Fuck that guy. I'm glad he's dead. I hope it hurt the whole time. By all means, quote me on that.
The darkness of night is lasting longer than it should. When I climb in the upstairs shower the water again thankfully runs clear. Its cold and wakes me up, though I'm still staggering drunk. Drinking in stomachfulls of water I emerge humming a companion piece to the concert around us. At least, I'm vibrating my throat and chest. It feels like what making sounds used to do. We've laid out couch cushions covering most of the deck and are observing. Writing onna legal pad witha pen screenprinted Al's plumbing, Laura says it feels like noon. We've been dosing off in turns. She suggests Father Alien instead of Mother Nature. Our three local groups of singers have played through at least two albums of repeating hits. I turned off the radio, though it didn't respond immediately, stubbornly buzzing at least an hour after the off command was issued. My vintage is 1973, something in French. Saltine crackers, spray cheese inna can. I keep thinking about Mitch Hedberg's joke about it glowing in the dark, every bite. The chimes have almost completely faded, along with the brightness and location of its point of emanation. Glee club is picking up the tempo, but seemingly content with their distant concert halls. When I heavily plop down the notepad is passed over. Two words: Foxes. Below. Laura is strategically stationed under the thick fringed vinyl umbrella that formerly stood in the center offa round glass table next tooa propane cookstove. On its side its functioning assa lean-to tent. Hanging my head over the railing, my eyes are greeted with twenty to thirty smaller shiny pairs staring back. Ashen grey and brownish-red foxes are doing much the same as we are, minus alcohol. Laura hands me a bag of marshmallows and we toss them down one by one. They look cute, smiling almost. I shiver. Laura tugs at my jacket and I join her on the other side of the lean-to. We stuff marshmallows in our ears, hoping we don't wake to find ants crawling, searching through our brains.
Something is tickling my face and smells like bubblegum. Opening my sleepshut eyes I discover an orange fox on my chest, staring directly at me. It licks my nose several times and is instantly gone when a peal of gravelly smoker's laughter erupts from beside me. Some giant, probably taloned hand has turned the volume knob of the world back to the right again. Trees, river, that sweeping, scratching noise, all back. I haven't seen Laura happy, even briefly, like this since we found ourselves wandering. The little furry scamp ate the marshmallows out of her ears too, she says. For minutes it is easier to breathe, even with the obligatory cigarette smoke. Happiness is rare now, has been for years. Just a little reminds my body what its like to be alive. Lighter grey, occluded sky. Something like morning has arrived, however late. The same clawed huge fingers changed the world's gear ratio back to where it was. We're spinning...I see a flash of memory instead of what my eyes report. My autistic daughter spinning herself dizzy holding a ribbon, a glittery one, inches thick, sparkles fluttering. Quickly I pretend to cough and turn away, holding my closed fist in front of my face. There is no need to spoil whatever semblance of humanity is left in us by sharing this thought. " I'll make breakfast! Something hot! " She knocks the umbrella over leaping up like a clumsy feline. Burying my face in the rough cushions, I bite down on the material covering the foam, thankfull to be out of view.
Breakfast is handmade tortillas, generic, mechanically separated beef fromma squat can, diced tomatoes, black beans, corn. Blue rings of flames perform the chemistry on command. All the exciting little kid junk food has been torn through, leaving stacks of stolid, adult canned rations. There is plenty of wine. At first discovery I advised Laura not to quaff the ones that read " Port ". A friend's favorite author was Jack Kerouac. He mentioned more than thrice getting drunk on port wine. Turns out that's code for alcoholic cherry snow cone syrup. Which did provide me with the line " Man, I ain't shit my pants since I was twenty-seven! " For the record, my favorite author is HP Lovecraft. My takeaway was never, ever swim or float on, in, near, or near a painting of the ocean. Better include lakes to be sure. And iffit doesn't have fins reconsider your menu choice.
Considering the condition of the world around us we had immediately abandoned our lifelong commitment to living green and recycling. Throwing our refuse over the wooden railing wasn't an issue that required debate or reconsidering. Fort Mumbleblarrg, upon our commandeering, quickly became unfit to impress visiting colonels. Both of us passed out underneath the tilted umbrella, she under a thin blanket and I sporting a hideous shower curtain that was most certainly someone's stolen memento offa naughty liaison, the grey above us got brighter and dimmed. My eyebrows knitted upon being disturbed. Is today Wednesday? Forgot to set the cans out on the curb. Shitgoddamnmotherbitch the old couple two doors down are alcoholics. They're green container is full of-
Slowly raising my head and torso from the seat cushions I have the conscious thought that I really don't want to know what is making that waste management noise underneath my feet. I am tired of acquiring knowledge. My head is full, thank you. Try again next year. Mayhap by then I'll have finally succeeded in getting rid of those terrible '80s pop country lyrics that my parents thought would be useful to carry around with me for the rest of my life. Or that list of all the adverbs in the English language my frizzy-headed bitch offan AEGT teacher shoved in without permission. Then I'll have space for more data storage, but not now. Something is snorting and something is loudly crinkling. Maybe the social security office sent the wrinkly winos some of the CIA's cocaine stash covertly disguised as Sun Chips. They're humping furiously in the drainage ditch and feeling like teenagers again. That's sweet. Let 'em throw bottles and challenge life with a shaking skyward fist. She wassa cheerleader and he built an entire car from junkyard parts in Auto Shop. Their kid got dismembered five ways bya landmine, but that was at least six years ago. What-
Decking underneath vibrates as whatever is below us thuds against one of the support beams. A misty exhalation of partially digesting organic matter sprays into view on the other side of the railing. I still haven't sprung to my feet. Blood pressure hasn't come close to spiking. We all have our fetishes. Who am I to tell them what do after the evening news onna weekday? Can't believe you're poking me in the ribs to relate this story. Bullshit. You'll smile and wave when we drive by like always. A low, three second rumbling causes the deck to vibrate atta different wavelength. Fucking waves, man. No, I don't wanna go to the beach. They eat lots of cabbage and partake in excited conversations at mealtimes. They're passionate people. I am not getting out bed. That's what the largest sites on the internet are for. To see things like this whenever you wake up.
I. Am. Sleeping.
Go. Away.
Fuck. This.
Brown bears are smaller than black bears, which are in turn smaller than grizzlies. This one is grey. Its back sports the left arm and face offa human melted into it, off-center towards the animal's right flank. Impossible to tell if the face belongs tooa man or woman. Just the first two inches are showing, matted with the bear's greyed fur. The eyes are lidless and staring with tiny dots for pupils, pale brown eyes seeming to fade to grey with their surroundings. The left arm is active, flailing and grasping at anything that touches the palm momentarily. Mouth is slack, open, no tongue. I don't know how to judge how large the bear is. I think its bigger than a standard brown one, and I have no geographic clues. Fort Mumbleblarrg's newcomer is not okay with its tenants selfish policy of not sharing foodstuffs with the local wildlife, except insects. And its demanding toobe heard. I have been close tooa few brown bears before, seen pictures of the other ones, and I don't remember them having teeth this long and sharp. Jagged, like shark's teeth. At least they're not in rows. Huh. Whata strange thought.
An explosion, this one close enough to send flaming fist sized chunks of burning matter hailing down upon us and everything in sight. A searing blast of oven barrels directly sideways, transmuting the visible spectrum to the final day offa carnival, full of cheap plastic bottled whiskey, burnt sugar, understated menace, and malice overt. Both of us are thrown against the far railing. Almost losing consciousness, we scramble to toss several erupting couch cushions over the side before the rest of the upholstery ignites. The entire deck vibrates violently as the nightmare bear is thrown against the mooring posts, its jaws snapping several times like a shark's. A shriek far too reminiscent of human speech bellows from below. Laura is on her feet first, brandishing her sawtoothed machete but backing towards the sliding glass doors, one of which has cracked deeply but maintained its integrity. I follow her wide-eyed gaze to spy the offending creature coming into view as it woundedly staggers towards the riverbank. A two foot section of its rear flank is actively on fire, on the side opposite its unfortunate human addition. The human handed arm is flailing, fingers blurring. It becomes apparent that the unsettling sounds its making are also coming from the face enmeshed in the fur on its back. Unbelievably I find myself fascinated, unable to take in any other stimuli. Trailing an stench part burning hair and part Texas BBQ, it tumbles headfirst over a rocky ledge and is swept splashing fetid mudwater with the current. I lose my stomach contents over the railing, tannin-rich and sharply red. Behind me, a clang resounds as the machete hits now bare wood slats and a sound much more disheartening than any our mutant visitor had uttered bursts from Laura's lungs.
[ charred glass and copper, poly-fill and stuffed animals' eyes, once alive with children's imagination now splattered with phlegm and dirt
carousel uneven creaks flashing ticking bulbs in the humid summer air
the disappointment in her eyes
parasites replacing fish tongues
many eyed the reproach
ifs, not whens
dovecote abandoned
sharp stab upon kneeling]

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2024.03.26 04:15 EmergencyAccount9668 Omega-6 fatty acids: the alternative hypothesis for diseases of civilization

https://web.archive.org/web/20210419222349/https://breaknutrition.com/omega-6-fatty-acids-alternative-hypothesis-diseases-civilization/

Omega-6 fatty acids: the alternative hypothesis for diseases of civilization

by breaknutrition Aug 25, 2017

Diseases of civilization

The world is facing a health crisis of unprecedented proportions. What have become known as chronic diseases, Western Diseases, or Diseases of Civilization (DC), have become pandemic as populations around the world adopt the lifestyle that first became prevalent in the country that perfected industrialization, the United States.

What are they?

The DCs revolve around the Metabolic Syndrome (MetSyn), a set of signs of disease that include central obesity, excess fats (or fatty acids) in the blood, high blood pressure and excess blood sugar. The diseases that associate with the MetSyn include the biggest killers in the industrial nations: heart disease, cancer, diabetes, neurological illnesses such as Alzheimer’s and host of seemingly unrelated autoimmune conditions.
Many causes have been blamed for the spread of the DCs; including lack of exercise, wheat consumption, excess consumption of calories, carbohydrates, sugar, animal fats, meat, environmental toxins such as pollutants or pesticides, genetics (most implausibly) and any cluster of associations dreadfully referred to as ‘multi-factorial’.
Each of these proposed causal factors fails, in my view, to explain the pandemic. What I’d like to introduce is an alternative hypothesis, one that better fits the observed epidemiology and that has clearly-described mechanisms that explain much of the pathology for the DCs.
Since it started in America, we’ll start with America. In the late 1800s and early 1900s three events occurred almost simultaneously. First, a method of detoxifying cottonseed oil, which had been an industrial waste product of the cotton industry, was discovered . Next came a method to ‘hydrogenate’ cottonseed oil, or make it into a solid-at-room-temperature edible fat . Thus cottonseed oil and the hydrogenated derivative known as Crisco—introduced in 1911—entered the food supply in large quantities for the first time .
Simultaneously, America began to experience heart disease in large quantities. Previously a very rare condition, heart disease quickly became an epidemic, and the relatively new modern medical profession began to track it, and attempt to devise treatments . Similarly, cancer “control” became a concern, with the forerunner of the American Cancer Society being founded in 1913 .

The single biggest change in the American diet over the 20th century was the increase in seed oils, which increased 1000-fold

What changed?

America, a massive agricultural exporting nation, exported the fruits of the industrial revolution, which included new foodstuffs, including white wheat flour, sugar and vegetable fatty acids— so called to distinguish them from the traditional animal fatty acids that had been used as food since human evolution.

I will refer to vegetable fats (or fatty acids) as seed oils, to distinguish fats made from seeds such as cotton, corn, soy, rape and others from fatty acids made from fruit like olives or palm fruit. This will become important later on.

Wherever American industrially-produced foods were introduced, DCs soon followed. Although not generally well known now, a number of doctors and scientists recognized the impact of industrial foods on populations abandoning their traditional diets for what has become known as the Standard American Diet (SAD) . I prefer the acronym MAD, Modern American Diet, as the American diet prior to industrialization was a largely meat-based one, and did not produce the same diseases, and will use that throughout . Original graph is from Teicholz, N., The Big Fat Surprise, Simon & Schuster: New York, 2014.
![chart representing meat consumption in the United States from 1800-2007](https://web.archive.org/web/20210419222349im_/https://i0.wp.com/breaknutrition.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/America-meat-trend-1.png?resize=1080%2C697&ssl=1)

Japan as the canary in the coal-mine

While there are many cases we could examine, perhaps the most telling was the MAD being introduced to post-WWII Japan. After the Japanese surrender, America took over the southern Japanese island of Okinawa, and used it for their base of operations. Unlike most other traditional cultures into which the MAD was introduced, Japan was a highly industrialized country. Yet Okinawans still ate a traditional diet that revolved around pork, yams, and fresh vegetables, and made them famous as one of the “Blue Zones”, a population with exceptionally long lifespans—in fact, the longest in the world .
What is less known is what happened after America took control. The first American fast-food restaurant opened in Okinawa, 9 years before Tokyo, to meet the American soldiers’ appetite. Okinawans also enjoyed American fast food and rapidly adopted it as their own . In that one generation, DCs exploded into Okinawa. Fathers attending the deaths of their sons became a common occurrence, with obesity, heart disease and cancer becoming common.
Hirome Okuyama, a Japanese scientist exploring the dramatic change in longevity in Okinawa, in 1996 published a paper pointing the finger clearly :

Dietary fatty acids – the N-6/N-3 balance and chronic elderly diseases. Excess linoleic acid and relative n-3 deficiency syndrome seen in Japan
“The age distribution of the survival rates of male Okinawans in 1990 is also interesting. The mortalities from all causes for the generations over 70 years of age were the lowest, whereas for those males less than 50 years old they were the highest among the 47 prefectures…”

In a single generation, Okinawa went from the lowest mortality in Japan to the highest

Seed-oils and refined flours brought DCs to Japan

This one incident clearly disproves a number of leading hypotheses on the emergence of DC. It’s clearly not genetic (although that’s a factor, especially in Japan), as gene networks underlying complex adaptations don’t change that quickly. It’s not just caused by total carbohydrates per se, as the Okinawans had a high carb diet with tubers, rice and fruit prior to Americans arriving .
![survey showing okinawan people dietary lifestyle ](https://web.archive.org/web/20210419222349im_/https://i2.wp.com/breaknutrition.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/okinawa-diet-table.png?resize=1080%2C225&ssl=1)
Americans introduced much larger quantities of cheap refined flours which replaced the Okinawan carb sources. It’s not caused by meat, as the rest of Japan had a huge increase in meat consumption after WWII, and longevity increased, unlike in Okinawa. It’s not caused by animal fatty acids, as they were rapidly replaced by cheap seed oils imported from America—which introduced a program to ‘Americanize’ the Japanese diet.
It’s unlikely to be caused by saturated fatty acids, as consumption of saturated fat was and remains lower in Japan than it was or is in America, and there are no mechanisms to explain how natural saturated fatty acids causes disease. Environmental toxins are an unlikely explanation too, as, while Japan was industrialized, Okinawa didn’t experience a major change in that regard.
There’s also no possibility of a local environmental factor in Okinawa, as Japanese who moved to America saw a similar increase in DCs. And just to throw it out there, this also disproves the cholesterol-heart disease hypothesis, as cholesterol is not associated with heart disease in Japan, but with increased longevity .

Excess Linoleic Acid Syndrome (ELAS)

In my reading, the diseases that surround the MetSyn share common traits. Inflammation and insulin resistance are oft-cited, but perhaps more significant traits include mitochondrial dysfunction, apoptosis (cell death), necrosis (tissue death) and genetic damage.
These point to the common mechanism, named ELAS by Okuyama . I think it’s the best candidate for cause and best explanation of the MetSyn and related, chronic DCs.

What’s Linoleic acid?

Linoleic acid (LA) is an Omega 6 fatty acid (n-6 PUFA) fat which is considered essential to human and animal function. To head folks off at the pass, n-6 fatty acids are found in all natural foods, plants and animals, so this isn’t something you need to avoid entirely – it’s not possible, nor necessary.
There are three major kinds of fatty acids. LA is a polyunsaturated fatty acid (PUFA) . It’s joined by monounsaturated fatty acids (MUFA) such as oleic acid (named for olive oil) and saturated fatty acids (SFA) such as stearic acid (named for steers, beef) or palmitic acid (named for palm oil). Fish oil is also a PUFA, but of the omega-3 variety (n-3 PUFA).
Omega 6 fatty acids are primarily made by plants, as are the similar n-3 PUFAs, and are concentrated up the food chain by animals eating those plants. The major sources of Omega 6 fatty acids in the MAD are oils refined from seeds and animals fed a high proportion of seeds.
PUFAs have traits which make them of interest: they’re highly susceptible to oxidation (rancidity), unlike MUFA or SFA, and they’re used throughout the body as building blocks for tissues and for various signaling functions, after being converted into other chemicals.

The rancidity of PUFAs is the root of the problem

When food goes rancid, it usually smells and taste bad because the MUFAs and PUFAs have decomposed into peroxides . Both n-6 and n-3 PUFAs are highly likely to go rancid. Humans don’t detect the rancidity of Omega 6 fatty acids particularly well, they smell slightly stale and people actually prefer the taste.
Contrast this to rancid n-3 PUFAs and imagine eating a rotten fish. No thanks! This is likely because concentrated n-6 foods were rare until the modern era .

The problems with rancid PUFAs

Both n-3 and n-6 PUFAs going rancid produce toxins, but the n-6 fatty acids produce worse toxins. Most notable of these—and best studied—are acrolein, HNE, and MDA; although there are many others. Collectively, they’re called oxidized linoleic acid metabolites (OxLAMs). Acrolein is the acute toxin found in cigarette smoke. HNE is the best marker of effects of ELAS, as it is only produced from n-6 fatty acids. All three are both produced in cooking or heating n-6 fatty acids, but are also produced in the body. How toxic are these products? Cooking with seed oils is the leading cause of lung cancer in non-smoking women in China .
The list of toxicities of these three chemicals is most impressive. Acrolein is a biocide, meaning toxic to all life. HNE and MDA are less bad than that but are cytotoxic (kill living cells), mutagenic (induce mutations in DNA) and genotoxic (destroy DNA). OxLAMs are also highly reactive, which means they can combine with other molecules in the body, inducing and stimulating malfunction .

A primary mechanism of ELAS

An increase in Omega 6 fatty acids consumption rapidly remodels the tissues in the body, as the fats are replaced throughout. In some tissues it happens within weeks, in others, like the human brain, it appears to take much longer . Increased n-6 consumption rapidly remodels cartilage, for instance, in all species studied, driving out the more stable omega-9 fatty acids (Oleic acid is a n-9 MUFA) . The same happens in mitochondria . As mentioned, mitochondrial dysfunction and DNA damage is a signature of the MetSyn and all related diseases. It’s seen in the fat cells in obesity, in the pancreas in diabetes and in the lining of the vessels of the heart in atherosclerosis, as well as in conditions of heart failure, fatty liver disease, neurological diseases such as Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s, and, most notably, cancer.

OxLAMs trigger destructive chain reaction events

The mechanism for this is well-described, although not well-recognized. Excess n-6 linoleic acid (LA) consumption causes a remodeling of a molecule called cardiolipin in the mitochondria, the key energy-producing part of cells in all higher life forms. Cardiolipin comprised of LA is uniquely susceptible to oxidation compared to n-3 PUFAs, MUFAs or SFAs and this can happen spontaneously, as LA oxidation can be catalyzed by iron and cardiolipin is in constant contact with iron atoms in mitochondria. When cardiolipin oxidizes, a chain reaction can start. In vitro, so on the lab bench, this reaction continues until all cardiolipin is consumed, but luckily our body has countermeasures .
In this process OxLAMs are produced. HNE, for instance, causes other cardiolipin molecules to oxidize, thus potentially causing a self-sustaining chain reaction. Reactive Oxygen Species (ROS) are produced in the reaction, which can also cause adjacent cardiolipin to oxidize .
However, OxLAMs are several orders of magnitude more damaging to the bodies than simple ROS . HNE itself can induce the production of ROS. Oxidized cardiolipin causes mitochondrial dysfunction, as mitochondria are impaired with oxidized cardiolipin .
What follows is mitochondria either collapsing, inducing apoptosis or necrosis . Apoptosis is seen throughout DCs—in cancer the cells are essentially ignoring the apoptotic signal and going rogue. The Warburg Effect noted in cancers is thought to be a cellular reaction to mitochondrial dysfunction in which the cells adopt an alternative energy pathway to better suit their uncontrolled proliferation.
Thomas Seyfried, who has contributed much to the field of cancer metabolism, notes that dysfunctional cardiolipin has always been observed in cancer cells so far . Necrosis is seen in late-stage DCs, such as atherosclerosis, cirrhosis of the liver, heart failure and Alzheimer’s.
Once loose in the cells, the OxLAMs rapidly propagate, in a process known as Oxidative Stress (OxStr). HNE and MDA are the primary markers used to measure OxStr. ROS cannot leave mitochondria which are well prepared for them, but OxLAMs, being water-soluble, rapidly distribute throughout the cells and beyond. OxLAMs are also a regular part of mitochondrial function: HNE induces mitochondria to downregulate as a basic negative-feedback mechanism.
Presumably this is to limit HNE creation and the spare the important antioxidant glutathione (GSH), as well as the aldehyde dehydrogenase enzyme (ALDH). GSH and ALDH are both important in protecting the body against evolutionarily-expected levels of HNE. Unfortunately for us, excess HNE can impair the function of both GSH and ALDH, thus allowing propagation of a runaway chain-reaction.
Decreased levels of GSH are a typical sign of excess production of HNE, and a dietarily induced deficiency in GSH production predisposes to the DCs . A genetic deficiency in ALDH, which is highly prevalent in Japan and China, predisposes to all DCs .

Tissue health as a function of levels of different fatty acids

Confusingly, assays of n-6 status in pathological tissues often show a lower level of n-6 than other fatty acids, and in these cases, addition of n-6 can actually improve function. This appears to be due to the chain reaction depleting LA or arachidonic acid (AA). The latter is a long-chain n-6 fatty acid produced in the body from LA. N-6 levels are lower, but HNE levels have risen as N-6 is converted into OxLAMs .
OxLAMs can bind to and alter the function of DNA, both in the mitochondrion and cell nucleus. In fact, they appear to be the leading cause of genetic damage, as the markers used for genetic damage are those generated by OxLAMs . Widespread generation of mutagenic and genotoxic chemicals in a live organism (in vivo) would go a long way towards explaining the genetic damage common in DCs.

OxLAMs are inflammatory

OxLAMs such as HNE directly induce inflammation, increasing inflammatory markers. Excess levels of LA-derived AA also induces inflammation, as it is used to build chemicals that send pro-inflammatory messages to the body. The mechanism of anti-inflammatory drugs such as aspirin, NSAIDs and Cox-2 inhibitors partially impairs this pathway.
It appears that a fundamental job of macrophages, an immune-system cell that attacks foreign cells, is to remove toxic OxLAMs from the tissues. Macrophage infiltration into tissue is seen in various DCs other than atherosclerosis, including obesity . One explanation is that the modifications made by OxLAMs to molecules cause those molecules to resemble Pathogen-Associated Molecular Patterns (PAMPs)—the molecules appear the same to macrophages as those on bacteria.
Antibodies for oxidized LDL cholesterol (OxLDL) exist and development of these antibodies for therapy against atherosclerosis has revealed the antibodies to be equally sensitive to bacteria-derived lipopolysaccharides and OxLDL .
Anti-cardiolipin antibodies are seen in several severe autoimmune diseases and are only sensitive to oxidized cardiolipin. Thus excess n-6 is a known cause of autoimmunity. It may be the fundamental cause of the increase in allergic diseases seen in Okinawa and around the world .

Specific disease pathologies

Cardiovascular Disease (CVD)

Goldstein and Brown received a Nobel Prize for discovering the LDL receptor . The next thing they tried to do was to induce the first stage of atherosclerosis, the conversion of macrophages into foam cells, which form the core of the atherosclerotic plaques that are thought to cause heart disease. They failed . Steinberg and Witztum then discovered that LDL must be modified through oxidation to cause macrophages to become foam cells

The nature of the substrate for lipid peroxidation, mainly the in lipid esters and cholesterol, is a dominant influence in determining susceptibility. As noted by Esterbauer et al. (52), there is a vast excess of in LDL, in relationship to the content of natural, endogenous antioxidants. The importance of the fatty acid composition was impressively demonstrated by our recent studies of rabbits fed a diet high in linoleic acid (18:2) or in oleic acid (18:1) for a period of 10 wk. LDL isolated from the animals on oleic acid-rich diet were greatly enriched in oleate and low in linoleate. This LDL was remarkably resistant to oxidative modification, measured either by direct parameters of lipid peroxidation

Esterbauer discovered HNE which is always present in atherosclerotic lesions in all species. Oxidized n-6 PUFAs comprise a large proportion of the fatty acids found in these plaques . OxLDL is the second-best known predictor of myocardial infarction, exceeded only by the OxLDL/HDL ratio (HDL is high-density lipoprotein) .
Other aspects of circulatory disease, such as varicose veins and erectile dysfunction, also display increased rates of OxStr, as determined by the presence of OxLAMs. HNE and oxLDL are active throughout the pathological process to create foam cells, induce macrophage entrance into the lining of the vessels and spur apoptosis, necrosis as well as DNA damage seen in atherosclerosis.
Steinberg and Witztum followed up their rabbit study with a human study, which confirmed the importance of LA in creating OxLDL . Other studies have confirmed the effect. The most successful CVD prevention trial ever, the Lyon Diet Heart Study, which produced a 70% reduction in CVD rates, specifically reduced the consumption of LA and increased the consumption of n-3 and n-9 fats.
It adds validation to the mechanism in humans but should be noted that the metabolites were not measured . Clearing HNE reduces atherosclerotic lesions in an animal model .
Similarly, oxidative activities of OxLAMs are seen in varicose veins, with these markers always being present at affected areas . Erectile dysfunction also appears to be a consequence of this process. Erectile dysfunction drugs, aside from the obvious effects, also have an antioxidant effect, and appear to prolong life in those with vascular diseases .

Cancer

Cancer is considered by many to not be a single disease but a wide array of diseases with, so far as we know, different causes. Viruses are a well-known cause of certain cancers, so it is safe to say that there is no single causal agent of cancer, however appealing that prospect would be.
Much of the pathological behavior of cancer cells can be explained by the effects of OxStr: mitochondrial dysfunction, genetic damage, and a shift to glycolysis despite the presence of oxygen. HNE damages and impairs the function of pyruvate dehydrogenase, the enzyme that allows substrates produced by glycolysis to enter the mitochondria .
This loss, combined with malfunctioning mitochondria emitting high rates of ROS and OxLAMs, may explain the metabolic dysregulation and anti-oxidant upregulation often seen in cancer cells.
Epidemiological work has shown low rates of cancer in populations eating traditional diets. In Asians, migration to industrialized countries increases breast cancer rates many-fold to the point where they reach Western levels .
LA in the diet is in fact required to induce cancer in animals experimentally. The cancer-promoting effects of LA increase as it increases in the diet. This effect plateaus at around 4.4% of total energy, well below levels of consumptions seen in industrial civilizations .
![chart showing level of cancer tumors in rat consuming high levels of EFA in their diet.](https://web.archive.org/web/20210419222349im_/https://i2.wp.com/breaknutrition.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/4-LA-cancer-rats-1.png?resize=870%2C1052&ssl=1)
One of the hallmark traits of cancer cells is the seemingly random mutations pervading unstable and disorganized nuclear genomes. There can be tens of thousands of mutations, much fewer than that and sometimes none at all . For many cancers, the theory of it resulting from a single mutation doesn’t hold for most cancers. HNE and MDA both damage DNA in vivo and HNE preferentially damages the p53 gene. The latter is part of the body’s natural cancer-control mechanism and is defective in colorectal and hepatocellular cancers .

Obesity

Omega 6 fatty acids consumption appears to be involved in obesity through several pathways. HNE, which is elevated in obesity, directly induces fat-storage across species at an intra-cellular molecular level by inducing pathological behavior in adipose tissue. The latter then fails to differentiate normally, leading to engorged adipose cells typical of obesity . As LA converts to AA, AA upregulation leads to increased production of endocannabinoids anandamide and 2-AG.
Anandamide and 2-AG are the cannabinoids our body’s produce themselves and are so-called mimetics of trans-Δ⁹-tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) found in marijuana. Injection of endocannabinoids in animal models induces overeating, regardless of how full they feel . Elevated 2-AG is a typical feature in human obesity.
Several studies by a group at the NIH have shown that dietary LA modulates production and levels of 2-AG and can directly induce obesity . Blocking the endocannabinoid receptor using a drug prevents obesity and metabolic syndrome, in animals and humans; however the side-effects like increased rates of suicide are unacceptable, leading to withdrawal of the drug .

Diabetes

One long-observed medical observation is that insulin resistance (IR) accompanies sepsis, a condition caused by infection. OxStr precedes IR in humans and OxLDL antibodies acutely reduce IR in a primate model of atherosclerosis . So the PAMPs found in OxLDL appear to be preoccupy by the immune system, with IR maybe being a reaction to a perceived infection.
A reduced LA diet has been shown to reduce IR in two human studies; one measured OxLAMs, which were also reduced .
HNE injected into skeletal muscle cells directly induces IR in those cells . Mitochondrial dysfunction is a common feature of diabetes and the resulting shift in energy production may play a role in IR. LA directly induces hyperinsulinemia in vivo in animal models of beta cells (which produce insulin in the pancreas) and OxLDL directly causes beta-cell death.
High levels of blood sugar (hyperglycemia) is a central feature of type 2 diabetes. Shulman et al. argue an adipose-centric theory whereby hyperglycemia in type 2 diabetes results from uncontrolled adipose tissue lipolysis which feeds into liver metabolism as an excess of acetyl-CoA that will go on to spur further gluconeogenesis (the creation of new glucose).
Others postulate a liver-centric theory where insulin directly changes the liver’s insulin-to-glucagon ratio, lowering it and thus leading to further gluconeogenesis .
Regardless of the explanation one subscribes to about why type 2 diabetics have high blood sugars, high levels of HNE accompany dysregulation of gluconeogenesis. However, I’ve not seen a mechanism to explain it.
The relation between the food you eat and insulin secretion is represented by the food insulin index, an interesting metrics to watch if you are diabetic.

Neurological diseases

OxStr has become recognized as a major pathological factor in several severe neurological conditions, the incidence of which has been increasing along with increasing n-6 consumption, as seen with Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s and Lou Gehrig’s disease (ALS). As opposed to rat brains, human brains appear to have a rate-limiter for uptake of LA. AA however, which is only produced in small quantities from LA but concentrates in tissues, does pass the blood-brain barrier.
It’s been observed that AA increases prior to the onset of Alzheimer’s but decreases after its onset . AA is more subject to oxidation to HNE than LA is. HNE and other OxLAMs increase as AA decreases, perhaps indicating the self-perpetuating reaction is underway.
HNE is always found in the pathological areas of the brain. Injecting HNE in an animal model induces the formation of beta-amyloid plaques , the signature of Alzheimer’s disease.
People suffering from epilepsy have been prescribed high-fat ketogenic diets and often benefited from them immensely .
This is possibly because of direct neuronal effects of the diet on “ATP-sensitive potassium (KATP) channel modulation, enhanced purinergic (i.e., adenosine) and GABAergic neurotransmission, increased brain-derived neurotrophic factor (BDNF) expression consequent to glycolytic restriction, attenuation of neuroinflammation, as well as an expansion in bioenergetic reserves and stabilization of the neuronal membrane potential through improved mitochondrial function” .
However, these ‘clinical’ or ‘classical’ ketogenic diets have used highly inflammatory fats like hydrogenated soybean oil and have even been given as replacement shakes instead of a meal . This likely renders the treatment much less effective given how triggering (epileptogenic) inflammatory factors can be for epilepsy . This is why more modern incarnations of the diet tend to use a variety of non-inflammatory fats like butter, lard, coconut oil and olive oil which also happen to taste better.

Liver Disease

Non-Alcoholic Fatty Liver Disease (NAFLD) is a new disease which only appeared when n-6 consumption levels reached the current high levels.
It mimics the effects of alcohol-induced Fatty Liver Disease (FLD). Like cancer, LA is required to induce FLD in animals. Very low levels of LA in the diet allows animals to consume up to 30% of energy as alcohol without pathology .
Total Parenteral Nutrition (TNP) is a feeding strategy in humans with damaged or malformed guts. Fatty liver is a common consequence in TNP and replacing LA-rich oils with fish oils cures the condition in human infants .
A small pilot study from Poland examining NAFLD in humans reduced the dietary levels of n-6 while providing the bulk of calories as carbohydrates.
OxLAMs were reduced, as was insulin, HOMA-IR, weight and NAFLD resolved in 100% of subjects . HNE directly induces the fibrosis seen in advanced liver disease and in other DCs.

Blindness

The leading cause of the blindness in the United States is Age-related Macular Degeneration (AMD). This is probably the only condition where the causal role of n-6 has not only been established but is becoming widely recognized. It’s illustrative of principles that should likely be informative for treating other DCs. The retina of the eye is rich in PUFAs and like other tissues is affected by diet.
N-3 supplementation does not affect the progression of AMD unless it’s accompanied by low n-6 intake . That combination is preventative—an evolutionarily-appropriate balance of the fats appears to be crucial. N-6 fatty acids are very susceptible to oxidation by radiation, even visible light; blue light will induce retinal n-6 PUFAs to oxidize to highly toxic HNE.
This may also be the causal pathway behind sunburn and skin cancer.

And more!

Osteoporosis, osteoarthritis, asthma, diabetic side-effects such as kidney failure, chronic pain and my personal favorite, sunburn, all have pathological roots in ELAS. Even high rates of violence have been compellingly linked to ELAS.

Pathological cofactors

Several cofactors induce worsened OxStr is humans. In vitro, mixing LA, glucose and water at physiological concentrations induces peroxidation of LA into OxLAMs; the same has been shown in an in vivo animal model where increased n-6 feeding induced cardiolipin breakdown with subsequent induction of hyperglycemia causing mitochondrial collapse and cardiac necrosis .
This is seen in heart failure, now epidemic amongst humans. Alcohol, fructose, smoking, radiation and infection all increased levels of OxStr and as in FLD, the effects of OxLAMs may play a role in the pathology associated with those factors. If two factors contribute to a disease but the disease only appears when one is present, it’s logical to conclude that the required factor is causal.

A final note on epidemiology

The epidemiology around n-6 consumption and DCs reminds me of an old joke. A policeman sees a drunk crawling around under a street light.

“What are you doing?”
“I’m looking for my keys!”
“You lost them here?”
“No, I lost them over there.”
“Why are you looking here, then?”
“Because this is where the light is!”

Applying epidemiology to nutrition is a very daunting task. Conducting it in a modern, industrial society is much easier than going to a traditional society with no government statistics or wealthy research institutions.

So most of the epidemiology looking at food consumption is done in the industrial nations, which have mostly had high incidences of seed oils for a very long time, before nutritional epidemiology became a science

Seed oils appear to cease increasing rates of cancer appearance after they comprise 4.4% of energy, and saturate tissues at 5% .
Most industrial populations get more than 5% of energy from seed oils , so comparing one to another is to compare high to high, when what one wants to see is high vs low.
Nevertheless, there are a number of studies looking at DCs in populations with differing food patterns, and they strongly support the hypothesis, with the incidence of DCs in populations consuming fewer seed oils being either fractional or non-existent . This likely explains the rapid increase in DCs seen in countries eating MAD-type diets.

What’s missing?

According to several scientists I’ve read the work of or listened to lately, funding is missing. This is highlighted by Dr. Ron Krauss who works at the National Institutes of Health (NIH). According to him, the NIH have largely stopped funding clinical nutrition research.
That, combined with the pro-n-6 PUFA bias in the American nutrition establishment, means that it’s unlikely much research will be done in the U.S. Much of the research seems to be done in either second-tier US institutions or in Europe and Asia.
There’s a lot of lab work looking at mechanisms but not a lot of human interventional studies. The few that do exist however, like the Lyon Diet Heart Study, Christopher Ramsden’s work and the pilot LA metabolite intervention from Poland are all very compelling .
Research I would like to see on this question is an examination of PUFA status and OxLAM load in those few people still eating a traditional diet free from DCs, as well as interventional studies lowering n-6 PUFA.

Most such studies make no attempt to lower n-6, but just add n-3 on top of it. Due to competition between the two types of fatty acids and as seen in AMD, this is unlikely to be a successful strategy

It’s essentially the modern Japanese diet: excess n-6 but good n-3. This has not prevented DC in Japan, but they do have lower rates of some diseases, like cardiovascular diseases.

Conclusion

HNE was discovered in the early 1980s, many decades after seed oils were introduced. The relationship between n-6 and endogenous production of signaling molecules was discovered later. N-3 fatty acids became recognized as important after that.
Research into this topic was in the 10s of papers in the 1970s and has increased by 135-fold today. It’s a burgeoning field but one that appears to be very much under the radar. In reading through the literature, I have come to the conclusion that the case for ELAS as the root cause of Diseases of Civilization is overwhelming.
Personally, I came to this topic through Stephan Guyenet and his excellent Whole Health Source blog. After months of reading his posts and reading the papers he linked to, I decided to cut seed oils from my diet on the spur of the moment, standing in front of the salad dressings in a cafeteria.
My irritable bowel syndrome of 16 years disappeared in two days. My carb cravings disappeared as quickly, allowing me to discover an underlying wheat sensitivity. Sunburn became a thing of the past and as a pale blonde who had always assumed I was ill-adapted to life under the sun, this was revolutionary.
My excess weight dropped off, along with my now too-large pants one morning, never to return. And after six broken bones in two years, I haven’t broken one since.
I started reading on the topic because I wanted to understand what had caused my personal health recovery – and I guess because I like puzzles.

What to do about excessive n-6 consumption?

Avoid eating seed oils, foods containing seed oils—junk food and animals fed high levels of grains and seed oils, like pork and chicken. Don’t go crazy with the nuts. Eat some fish. But no, you can’t fix ELAS with extra n-3 fatty acids like fish oil, as the Japanese case demonstrates.
Except for fasting, this is the simplest health intervention ever, as it’s impossible to become deficient in n-6 fatty acids when eating whole foods. Even if a fraction of the diseases with pathological signs pointing to n-6 are proven, you’ll still be far better off.
William E.M. “Bill” Lands spent his scientific career studying the role of n-6 and n-3 fatty acids in the body. His conclusion, the title of an article written during his retirement, deserves to be the note to end on here :

Prevent the cause, not just the symptoms

submitted by EmergencyAccount9668 to StopEatingSeedOils [link] [comments]

2024.02.28 10:55 yoyocalldapopo Nearly every medication I have ever tried has no effect or very little. Can somebody please provide any insight or suggestion that may help.

I am 28F, Caucasion, 175cm tall and 100kg. I want to preface this with I have a condition known as Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). If you are unfamiliar with the disorder it is the most complex and extreme trauma disorder that exists. If PTSD was a level 1 and CPTSD is a level 2, then DID is a level 5 on the trauma disorder scale.
One of the key features of this condition is that it can only develop during early childhood, while neural networks in the brain are still connecting. As a result many neural networks are left disconnected. This is a very simple explanation but can be referred to as structural dissociation.
Like with PTSD, a trigger can activate flashbacks, and these memories will be contained within the certain disconnected neural networks. This effectively means that neural networks can switch on and off and all of the associatied functions with it.
For example- I have a neural network that is mostly cognitively akin to a 3yo. When it is switched on I have the motor skills, impulse control and delayed gratification of a 3yo as well as childlike interests and perceptions.
Here is the problem with medications- it is not very well understood of researched but many medications are completely ineffective or have very little effect compared to a typical patient.
I know that all opioid medications are ineffective, because dissociation produces endogenous opioids, and I believe to the extent that I have experienced this has made my opioid receptors extremely downregulated. I now take naltrexone that assists to lower my dissociation and up regulate my receptors. (But yet opioid meds still dont work at all whether i am taking naltrexone or not).
I have also discovered that meds like benzos have no effect. From my research I have found that this probably means my Gaba receptors are down regulated as well. I have previously tried gabapentin for other symptoms and this was ineffective too.
I even had a lung operation and every single med they put me on felt 90% ineffective. I had a paravertable block, a PCA with morpheine, oral tramadol and other pain killers and still I would find myself viscerally screaming seemingly out of my control from how painful the procedure was.
I have recreationally taken drugs and things like cocaine have no effect.
I have felt the effects of MDMA once (and taken many times). Unsure if that pertains to quality or other factors.
I have had psilocybin- this has had profound healing effects for me- however sometimes I can take 10g dried with no effects, other times I am tripping akin to a heroic dose. Yes i have considered factors such as what I ate that day etc- there is no indetifiable pattern.
Cannabis i have been prescribed has similar effects, and some days It has effect and other days none (and vice versa- no patterns with tolerance. I could have 3g one day and feel nothing, the next day one puff of the same strain and I am baked).
My theory is that certain parts of my brain have extremely down regulated receptors, others not so much. So with the neural networks switching on and off seemingly at random changes the effects of how I feel the meds if at all.
I am wondering if anyone here has any ideas, similar experiences or suggestions? Does anyone have any insight into what may be haopening beyond my basic understanding, and if there are any treatments, specialists, supplements etc you could recommend?
I have been doing research to find things that could help upregulate these receptors and honestly I have already tried most of these (for 3+ months minimum each, up to a year or more).
I have tried these supplements/ meds. I am listing everything even if it ties to other conditions as I feel maybe thats important to consider (and probably forgetting a few).
My other conditions are PCOS, chronic fatigue, iron deficiency, suspected fibromyalgia and hypermobility ehlers danlos syndrome (awaiting screening), possible POTS (however when i went on prorpanolol for anxiety it cleared every POTS symptom I had), ASD level 2, ADHD (though i question if this is just trauma), CPTSD. I also likely have FND and am awaiting screening. I currently struggle with extreme chronic pain and fatigue. I am going crazy thay no pain meds work.
Supplements (hard to say whats effective) - various medicinal mushrooms - maca powder (feel effects) - ashwaganda - Bioceuticals brand "adrenoplex" ( mix of adaptogenics) (was once very effective, now not) - saw palmetto - spearmint - damiana - so many types of magnesium - b12 - iron - iodine - zinc - d3 - b12 - inositol (very effective)
Medications (ineffective) - diazepam - lorazepam - alprazolam - codeine - oxycodone - tramadol (slow and fast release) - morphine - local anesthetic (need huge doses) - dexamphetamine - modafinil - atomoxetine (slight effect possibly)
Medications (unsure if effective or not, if so very mild) - pregablin - gabapentin - paracetamol - aspirin - melatonin - cbd oil - spironolactone - several anti biotics (cannot remember, but every time I need anti biotics I nees more rounds than expected or they change to something stronger)
Medications (effective) - propranolol - orphenadrine - clonidine - metformin - meloxicam - naproxen - ibuprofen - cannabis (higher thc strains)

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2024.02.21 23:35 thestorybegins254 Toxic MIL

Please do not share..
My MIL wanted me to be with her son since we were preteens. It did not work out until our mid-twenties. All was going well, until we got engaged. She did several things, making comments, not interested in being involved in our wedding planning or helping etc. I tried to overlook and not get my feelings hurt by this, because I tried to understand I was "taking" her son away from her. One night, she called me 57 times while I was in night class, to threaten to have me arrested for stealing a quilt from her house. The quilt was later found in the back of a closet. Honestly she made lots of ugly comments and remarks about me, my family. I really have a hard time holding grudges, because my memory is awful, and I usually forget why I was even mad at someone. However, I know that my ex-communication is valid.
Right before our wedding it went downhill fast. She called my mother the day before our rehearsal to tell her that she needed to convince me to call off our wedding. She stated that I deserved a doctor or lawyer, not her son. She made a production of how I was making a mistake and that if I married him, I could not "give" him back, he was my issue. My mom took up for me and her soon to be son in law, and my MIL decided she would not come to her only son's wedding.
After a short time my husband forgave her for not coming to the wedding and started communicating with her on a regular basis. She called me several times yelling at me and telling me how much I would regret my decision to marry my husband. She would cuss me out and then get mad that I did not invite her to our house. My husband took up for me. She told my Sister in law (SIL) horrible lies about me which she told my husband right before our one year anniversary, that almost caused us to break up. She was constantly going between my husband, my SIL, and myself talking about the other one. It caused lots of hard feelings that have since been resolved. This has gone on for the last 7 years.
I stopped communicating with her almost two years ago. I found out around that time that I was pregnant with our first child. We had a hard time getting pregnant and when we told her, she said "Well, forgive me for not being excited". You probably will not even be able to carry "IT" to full term". I will be excited after you give birth." I completely blocked her on everything. I told my husband that if he needed a relationship with her that was his decision, but I was done. When we got closer to the due date, I knew in the back of my mind that I may have to give in a little so she could see her grandson. My only request is that she not come to the hospital. I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. I had some issues with my blood pressure so I had to stay in the hospital an extra day. My MIL showed up, and told the nurse to ask if she was allowed to come in. The nurse knew something was weird, because visitors had come and gone all day and other than asking my room number, none of them asked if they were allowed in. The nurse asked my husband and he allowed her in the room. I was so hurt. I could not get away (I was still hooked up to an IV, and a catheter). I cried the entire 10 minute visit. Even when she spoke to me, I could not form words. I think some of it was hormones, and some was just that I was hurt. After she left, my husband apologized. I could not talk to him about it, I was afraid I would say something I could not take back. I asked for one request and he did not respect me enough to tell her to leave. I did get over it, I know he felt like he was in a difficult situation, but I still think he handled the situation wrong.
By this time, I decided I was not willing to see her and I did not want her to have anything to do with our son. 8 weeks later she showed up at the house while I was out and demanded to see her grandchild. She told my husband she would take us to court to get visitation (this cannot happen and I knew that, it was an empty threat). She threatened to wait on our porch or driveway until I came back. My husband told her that if she did not leave he would call the cops to make her leave. She did finally leave and I knew nothing about it until I got back home.

She is now very ill, and having surgery soon. The surgery is going to be a lot on her body and she could not make it out. She has requested to see my husband and our son (I was not mentioned, no tears were lost on this). I told my husband that I would never stop him from seeing his mom, that he was the one that would have to live with his decision not me. However, I do not think our 16 month old needs to meet her during this time. He wouldn't remember anyway and if I can protect him from toxic people like this I think I should. Am I wrong?

**I know it is some type of heart surgery. She had a procedure done last month and did not stop taking her Goodys (which contain aspirin), and her blood was thin and there were complications ( all due to her decisions, not the procedure), she was in the ICU several days and had to get blood transfusions. This surgery is to help with blood flow, so I do understand that it is or could be series and not an elective procedure or minor. However, my feelings about our son seeing her have not changed, the surgery is scheduled for later next week. I have dealt with her mistreatment and have forgiven her to a sense. I don't want anything bad to happen to her, but when I speak of her, it's like speaking of a person I do not know. I don't wish ill feelings on her but I just don't have a reaction. I have lost the ability to care for her like I feel I should. I hate that she is going through this, my only obligation is to make sure my husband is okay, because I will not have lost or gained anything ( which when putting this to words sounds harsh). My husband has not accepted the way his mother is, and he still believes she can do better, or my favorite "that is just the way she is", to which I reply "that does not make it okay". I do feel that my lack of empathy is because of her actions. I feel like as a whole this entire situation has made me harder on people in general and less likely to continue to give them chances if they betray my trust or respect towards me or my family. I guess on the positive note it has made me stand up for myself faster, because I have realized that some people do not deserve so many chances to change. If they want to they will. My only real concern now is that I do not want my husband to resent my stance on this. I feel like as a whole we have been through so much, and I do not want him to think differently about me, because of me standing my ground about this. He has not pushed the issue, he told me what was going on and asked what I thought. I told him and he has not brought it up again. He does understand why I feel the way I do, but if something happens will he see the situation differently?

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2024.02.01 20:18 alliancetocure Cavernous Malformation-20 Questions Answered

1) WHAT IS CAVERNOUS MALFORMATION?

Cavernous malformations are also known as cavernous angioma, CCM, and cavernoma. They are made of abnormal blood vessels. They are not cancerous. Cavernous malformations are made of the smallest blood vessels, called capillaries. They resemble mulberries and have very thin walls compared with other blood vessels. Blood moves through them very slowly. The thin vessel walls can be leaky, allowing blood into the surrounding brain or spinal cord tissue. We believe about one in every 500 people has a cavernous malformation, but most people never have symptoms. Of the people who have a cavernous malformation, we believe many will never have a symptomatic hemorrhage.
The rarest place for a symptomatic cavernous malformation is in the spinal cord. A spinal cord cavernous malformation is not the same as a spinal hemangioma, which is located in the vertebra (bone). Cavernous malformations may also occur in the area of the brain called the brainstem. Spinal cord and brainstem cavernous malformations can cause more severe symptoms when they hemorrhage.

2) WHAT IS AN INCIDENTAL CAVERNOUS MALFORMATION?

Your doctor may have discovered your cavernous malformation (cavernous angioma, cavernoma) when you had brain or spinal imaging for a reason not related to your cavernous malformation. For example, you may have received a CT scan or an MRI after a car accident or concussion. In this case, doctors will call your cavernous malformation an incidental finding. Research has shown that incidental cavernous malformations that have not had a previous hemorrhage have a very small chance of ever becoming problematic. While you may want to follow the precautions listed in the Hemorrhage section of this booklet, you may not need repeat imaging unless instructed by your doctor or you develop symptoms. However, many doctors and patients choose to have imaging, typically with MRI, to monitor the lesion. For example, your doctor may order imaging during pregnancy, after medication changes, if another illness is diagnosed, or at times of dramatic lifestyle change, which can include extreme or unusual exercise.

3) WHO MIGHT BE INVOLVED IN MY CARE?

NEUROLOGIST – manages symptoms like seizure and pain
NEUROSURGEON – evaluates for surgery
REHABILITATION SPECIALISTS – improve functioning after brain event
ORTHOPEDIST – monitors spine in CCM3 patients (see Genetics)
NEURO-OPHTHALMOLOGIST – cares for brain-related vision problems
GENETICIST – evaluates for the hereditary form of the illness
DERMATOLOGIST – cares for vascular skin lesions in hereditary illness

4) WHAT CAUSES MULTIPLE CAVERNOUS MALFORMATIONS?

Some people have more than one cavernous malformation (cavernous angioma, cavernoma). This can happen for several reasons:

Most commonly, people with more than one cavernous malformation have a hereditary form of the illness. People with the genetic form of the illness typically develop additional cavernous malformations over time.
Some people may have a second kind of abnormal blood vessel called a developmental venous anomaly (DVA). Your doctor might also call this a venous malformation or venous angioma. This dilated blood vessel only rarely causes symptoms on its own. However, it may create conditions that make it more likely for cavernous malformations to form. This is not hereditary.
Brain or spinal radiation for cancer treatment can cause cavernous malformations to form many years later. In people with the hereditary form, radiosurgery to treat a cavernous malformation may also cause more lesions to form. You can find more information about radiosurgery in the section on Other Treatments.

5) WHAT IS SPORADIC CAVERNOUS MALFORMATION (CAVERNOUS ANGIOMA, CAVERNOMA)?

Sporadic cavernous malformation means that you are the only one in your family to have a cavernous malformation, and you do not have a genetic mutation that would cause your children to inherit the illness. Usually, individuals with the sporadic form of the illness have just one cavernous malformation with no other visible blood vessel abnormalities or medical history to explain the lesion.
Sometimes, individuals have a different kind of blood vessel abnormality called a developmental venous anomaly (DVA) or they have a history of brain radiation for cancer. A DVA or brain radiation can lead to the development of one or more cavernous malformations (see What Causes Multiple Cavernous Malformation? above). To be certain you have the sporadic form of the illness, you will need to have an MRI with some special images called susceptibility-weighted imaging or SWI. Ask your doctor if this was part of your original MRI. See Stacie and Vern’s Patient Stories to learn more about sporadic cavernous malformation with and without a DVA.

6) WHAT IS A BLEED OR HEMORRHAGE?

All cavernous malformations (cavernous malformations, cavernomas) have some chronic oozing of blood in the area of the lesion. This is what gives their typical appearance on MRI. Oozing is different from the more significant hemorrhage or bleed. A hemorrhage is new bleeding in the cavernous malformation and is often associated with new symptoms. Symptomatic hemorrhage is the most serious complication of cavernous malformation and is the most common reason for surgery. The hemorrhage may cause new symptoms or an increase in symptoms. The specific symptoms a person experiences will depend on the location and size of the cavernous malformation and the amount of blood that has leaked outside the lesion. Eventually, the blood breaks down leaving behind an iron deposit called hemosiderin.
Most lesions never hemorrhage. However, once a cavernous malformation has had one hemorrhage, it is at a significantly greater risk of bleeding again. In the first five years after a hemorrhage, the risk of another hemorrhage in a cavernous malformation that is not in the brainstem is 17-20% (1 in 5 lesions will have a second hemorrhage). The risk of a second hemorrhage in brainstem cavernous malformations is greater at 30% (1 in 3 lesions will have a second hemorrhage). Most of these second hemorrhages will take place in the first two years after the original hemorrhage. Fortunately, five years after a hemorrhage, the risk of another hemorrhage gradually returns to a rate that is similar to the risk from a lesion that has never bled.

7) WHAT CAUSES HEMORRHAGE?

We do not know what causes hemorrhage. Without evidence, it is hard for doctors to recommend specific precautions.

People with multiple cavernous malformations, usually caused by a familial form of the illness, are at higher risk.
There is no evidence at this time that medications or supplements that thin blood, such as ibuprofen or aspirin, can cause hemorrhage. However, doctors may recommend limiting their use. It is also not clear whether hormonal birth control or estrogen supplements should be restricted, but some doctors advise this, especially if a patient had a prior bleed on such medications or while pregnant.
Behaviors that can increase inflammation like smoking cigarettes may increase the risk of hemorrhage.
There is no reason to avoid flying in airplanes.
This is no reason to reduce aerobic exercise. We do not have enough data to determine whether weight-lifting may place one at higher risk.
Researchers don’t know if head trauma, including that which you might experience with contact sports, can cause hemorrhage.

Things you can do:

Animal studies have shown that MAINTAINING NORMAL VITAMIN D levels may be protective. Clinical research has indicated that patients who are Vitamin D deficient are more likely to have had active lesions. Your doctor can check your Vitamin D level with a blood test.
PROTECT YOURSELF against preventable, contagious illnesses with hand washing, and vaccinations.
FOLLOW YOUR DOCTOR’S ORDERS to manage other chronic illnesses, such as high blood pressure and diabetes.

8) WHAT SYMPTOMS CAN A CAVERNOUS MALFORMATION CAUSE?

Seizures are one of the most common symptoms of cavernous malformation (cavernous angioma, cavernoma). Seizures fall into two general groups: focal seizures that are local to one area of the brain and generalized seizures that involve both sides of the brain. All cavernous malformation seizures begin as focal seizures but some progress to generalized seizures. Neurologists use anti-epilepsy medications to control seizures. However, neurosurgeons have had good results in eliminating seizures with brain surgery if they are able to pinpoint which cavernous malformation is causing the seizures. Surgery is most successful when it occurs within two years of a first seizure. Brainstem and spinal cavernous malformations do not cause seizures.
We know people with cavernous malformation experience more frequent headaches than other people. A headache does not necessarily mean a new hemorrhage. For the most part, we can’t distinguish a cavernous malformation headache from any other kind of headache. A headache unlike one you have ever experienced or headaches, particularly on the same side or general location as your lesion, may be related to your lesion. A headache may be related to your cavernous malformation if it is unlike one you have ever experienced or if it is in the general location of your lesion.
The symptoms of a cavernous malformation hemorrhage depend on its location and size. Cavernous malformations can cause attention, memory, social skills, mood, and learning problems, particularly if the lesions are in the frontal, parietal, or temporal lobes, or in the cerebellum, even without obvious bleeding. This is particularly true for individuals with many lesions throughout the brain.
Cavernous malformations in many parts of the brain and spinal cord can cause weakness or numbness in the arms or legs. In some areas, such as the thalamus, they can also cause pain. A cavernous malformation in the brainstem can cause coordination problems called ataxia or can cause facial paralysis, usually on one side.
Cavernous malformations can cause vision problems. There are two kinds of vision problems: those caused by lesions in the occipital lobe of the brain, which affect how visual information is processed, and those caused by lesions in the brainstem, which affect how the eyes work.
A cavernous malformation can cause hearing problems, including loss of hearing and tinnitus, dizziness, or nausea, particularly if it is located in or near the cerebellum.
A cavernous malformation in the medulla, the lowest part of the brainstem, can cause spasms of the diaphragm, which resemble hiccups that don’t go away. More rarely, these can cause swallowing or even breathing problems.
Cavernous malformation hemorrhages in the brain can cause fatigue. Individuals may complain of fatigue for months to years after a major hemorrhage or brain surgery.
Spinal cord cavernous malformations can cause numbness, weakness, paralysis, tingling, burning, or itching. The location and extent of the symptom depend on the level of the spine affected. Spinal cord lesions can also cause difficulty with bladder and bowel control.

9) HOW OFTEN DO I NEED AN MRI?

You and your doctor will decide how often to repeat your MRI. Some doctors advise their patients to obtain repeat MRIs on a specific schedule. Others suggest waiting until there are additional symptoms Experts suggest more frequent imaging for those who may not be able to report symptoms, like young children or those with intellectual or communication problems. These individuals may also need sedation for MRI. You and your doctor will weigh the risk of sedation against the benefit of imaging. CT scan is another kind of imaging that is sometimes used. CT scan is much faster than MRI, but the images are not as clear, and the CT scan involves exposing a patient to radiation. You may have a CT scan in an emergency when MRI is not available. People with multiple cavernous malformations should limit their exposure to CT scans as much as possible because it is not clear whether the radiation exposure can cause the development of more lesions. A doctor may suggest a cerebral angiogram also known as a cerebral arteriogram. This procedure allows the doctor to see the arteries and veins in your brain. A cavernous malformation is not visible on an angiogram, but the test is done when another type of blood vessel lesion, called an arteriovenous malformation, is suspected. If a cavernous malformation has a typical appearance on MRI, it does not require a cerebral angiogram as part of routine care.8) WHAT SYMPTOMS CAN A CAVERNOUS MALFORMATION CAUSE?

Seizures are one of the most common symptoms of cavernous malformation (cavernous angioma, cavernoma). Seizures fall into two general groups: focal seizures that are local to one area of the brain and generalized seizures that involve both sides of the brain. All cavernous malformation seizures begin as focal seizures but some progress to generalized seizures. Neurologists use anti-epilepsy medications to control seizures. However, neurosurgeons have had good results in eliminating seizures with brain surgery if they are able to pinpoint which cavernous malformation is causing the seizures. Surgery is most successful when it occurs within two years of a first seizure. Brainstem and spinal cavernous malformations do not cause seizures.
We know people with cavernous malformation experience more frequent headaches than other people. A headache does not necessarily mean a new hemorrhage. For the most part, we can’t distinguish a cavernous malformation headache from any other kind of headache. A headache unlike one you have ever experienced or headaches, particularly on the same side or general location as your lesion, may be related to your lesion. A headache may be related to your cavernous malformation if it is unlike one you have ever experienced or if it is in the general location of your lesion.
The symptoms of a cavernous malformation hemorrhage depend on its location and size. Cavernous malformations can cause attention, memory, social skills, mood, and learning problems, particularly if the lesions are in the frontal, parietal, or temporal lobes, or in the cerebellum, even without obvious bleeding. This is particularly true for individuals with many lesions throughout the brain.
Cavernous malformations in many parts of the brain and spinal cord can cause weakness or numbness in the arms or legs. In some areas, such as the thalamus, they can also cause pain. A cavernous malformation in the brainstem can cause coordination problems called ataxia or can cause facial paralysis, usually on one side.
Cavernous malformations can cause vision problems. There are two kinds of vision problems: those caused by lesions in the occipital lobe of the brain, which affect how visual information is processed, and those caused by lesions in the brainstem, which affect how the eyes work.
A cavernous malformation can cause hearing problems, including loss of hearing and tinnitus, dizziness, or nausea, particularly if it is located in or near the cerebellum.
A cavernous malformation in the medulla, the lowest part of the brainstem, can cause spasms of the diaphragm, which resemble hiccups that don’t go away. More rarely, these can cause swallowing or even breathing problems.
Cavernous malformation hemorrhages in the brain can cause fatigue. Individuals may complain of fatigue for months to years after a major hemorrhage or brain surgery.
Spinal cord cavernous malformations can cause numbness, weakness, paralysis, tingling, burning, or itching. The location and extent of the symptom depend on the level of the spine affected. Spinal cord lesions can also cause difficulty with bladder and bowel control.

10) DO I NEED SURGERY?

If your cavernous malformation (cavernous angioma, cavernoma) is causing symptoms, you should have a very detailed discussion about surgical options with your neurosurgeon. The decision to have surgery always involves weighing risks and benefits. In general, experts recommend surgery if three criteria are met. First, the individual must have symptoms. Second, the cavernous malformation must have had at least two hemorrhages. Finally, removing the cavernous malformation will cause fewer deficits than another hemorrhage would. Sometimes, experts recommend surgery after just one hemorrhage. For example, surgery may be a good option for someone with epilepsy caused by a cavernous malformation even if they have only had one hemorrhage.
There are neurosurgeons who specialize in cerebrovascular (brain blood vessel) and skull base (brainstem) surgery. The experience level of a surgeon is the best predictor of a good surgical outcome. The American Academy of Neurological Surgeons offers a searchable directory of neurosurgeons by specialty. It is helpful to interview a number of surgeons, including asking them about their experience, and to consult with other patients through Alliance to Cure Cavernous Malformation before making decisions.

11) ARE OTHER TREATMENTS FOR CAVERNOUS MALFORMATION (CAVERNOUS ANGIOMA, CAVERNOMA) AVAILABLE?

Doctors have treated cavernous malformation with stereotactic radiosurgery, also known as gamma knife, linear accelerator, X Knife, Brainlab, or cyberknife, for many years, but its effectiveness is not clear. In stereotactic radiosurgery, focused radiation is directed at the cavernous malformation without opening the skull. Experts now recommend that radiosurgery be considered only with individuals who have a single symptomatic lesion that is in an area of the brain where the risks of traditional surgery would be too high. Radiosurgery should not be used for treating cavernous malformations that do not cause symptoms or for cavernous malformation in people with the hereditary form of the illness, as the radiation itself might trigger new cavernous malformations to form. Other minimally invasive surgical techniques are being used more widely.
Researchers are working to find medications to treat cavernous malformations. It may take more than one medication to treat every situation. Medications could be useful to:

Stabilize the cavernous malformation so it does not hemorrhage. Patients could use medications even before a first hemorrhage. This is particularly true for people with hereditary forms of the illness.
Stabilize the cavernous malformation after a hemorrhage to reduce the risk of the lesion bleeding again. Remember, there is a high-risk time in the first years after a hemorrhage. During this time, it might make sense to use a stronger temporary medication.
Slow or stop the development of more lesions in people who have multiple cavernous malformations.
Shrink or destroy existing cavernous malformations. This is the ultimate goal.

12) DO I NEED GENETIC TESTING?

Most people with a cavernous malformation do not need genetic testing. We believe only 20-25% of individuals with a cavernous malformation have a hereditary form of the illness. If you have just one cavernous malformation, you need an MRI with special imaging called susceptibility-weighted imaging (SWI) to rule out the hereditary form. If you have multiple cavernous malformations but you also have a developmental venous anomaly (DVA), SWI will show whether your lesions cluster near the DVA or whether they are in other areas of your brain. If the cavernous malformations are only around the DVA, you do not need testing. Having multiple cavernous malformations clustered around a DVA is typical of the sporadic form of cavernous malformation. You can’t inherit or pass down the sporadic form of the illness. People who have multiple cavernous malformations that are not associated with a developmental venous anomaly should request genetic testing. Sometimes people are the first in their family with a hereditary form. You do not need other affected family members to justify testing.

13) WHICH GENES WILL THE LABORATORY TEST?

There are three known genes that, when mutated, can cause a hereditary form of the illness. Researchers have named them CCM1, CCM2, and CCM3. In the United States, individuals who trace their ancestry to the original settlers of New Mexico and Chihuahua, Mexico have passed a specific mutation of the CCM1 gene down from generation to generation since at least the early 1600s. Researchers call this the common Hispanic mutation. However, you do not need to be Hispanic to have the hereditary form of the illness. Hereditary forms of cavernous malformation exist in every ethnic group everywhere in the world.
Each child of a person with the hereditary form has a 50/50 chance of inheriting the illness. It does not skip generations. However, up to half of the people with a hereditary form may have lesions but have no symptoms. Individuals with a mutation of the CCM1 or CCM2 gene develop multiple cavernous malformations and some develop cavernous malformations under the skin.
Individuals with a mutation on the CCM3 gene may have additional features. About half of individuals with a mutation on the CCM3 gene have their first hemorrhage as children. They hemorrhage more often and develop new lesions more quickly, at a rate of 2-3 new lesions per year (compared to an average of one lesion every two years for those with CCM1 or CCM2 mutations). They may have other physical issues such as scoliosis and benign brain tumors, most commonly meningioma. They are also likely to be the first in their family with the illness. Patients with a CCM3 mutation need additional monitoring and should contact Alliance to Cure Cavernous Malformation to learn more about our special programs.

14) HOW DO I GET GENETIC TESTING?

A medical professional such as a neurologist, neurosurgeon, geneticist, or genetic counselor must order genetic testing. Only a few labs in the United States perform testing, and many insurance companies do not cover the expense. Our website contains a list of testing laboratories and information about our free genetic testing program for individuals who qualify. Depending on the laboratory, you will submit either a blood or a saliva sample for testing. It may take up to six weeks to receive results. After you have received your result, your doctor or genetic counselor can talk with you about genetic testing for other family members. This can be a difficult topic for extended families, and it is important to have the support of a health professional. Family members who are not experiencing symptoms may choose not to be tested or have their asymptomatic children tested. Genetic testing is a very personal decision.

15) SHOULD I HAVE CONCERNS ABOUT PREGNANCY WITH A CAVERNOUS MALFORMATION (CAVERNOUS ANGIOMA, CAVERNOMA)?

At this time, experts believe women are no more at risk for hemorrhage during pregnancy than at any other time. But, a bleed during pregnancy can present challenges. Brain surgery to remove a cavernous malformation (cavernous angioma, cavernoma) during pregnancy is very rare but is undertaken in cases where a second hemorrhage would be life-threatening. Women with cavernous malformations can have a vaginal delivery if they have not had a recent hemorrhage. If your doctor suggests an MRI during your pregnancy, your MRI should not include gadolinium contrast. Women who have epilepsy and are on anti-epilepsy medications should talk with their doctors about the choice of medication and folate supplementation. Ideally, you should have this conversation before you become pregnant to prevent harm because some antiepilepsy medication can increase the risk of birth defects when taken in the first weeks of pregnancy. However, having a seizure during pregnancy can cause harm that is far more serious to the fetus. It’s important to continue antiepilepsy medication during pregnancy if you have had seizures and are pregnant.

16) ARE THERE SPECIAL ISSUES FOR CHILDREN WITH A CAVERNOUS MALFORMATION?

There is the potential for many special issues with children, depending on their age at diagnosis and their symptoms. Young children may not be able to tell you about symptoms, so it becomes important to schedule imaging regularly. On the other hand, it is also important to avoid overreacting so that children aren’t exposed to unnecessary medical procedures, radiation from CT scans, MRI contrast medication, and sedation. It is not always possible to strike a balance, and every parent will err in both directions at one point or another. As a child grows older and parents become more experienced, managing this illness becomes easier. Telling your child about his or her diagnosis can be emotional and can require a period of adjustment for your child. Try to explain in simple terms that are age-appropriate. Having a pediatric mental health professional ready to help can make this easier. A mental health professional can also help if a child with hemorrhage or surgery-related deficits struggles with peer relationships, restrictions on activities, or academics. You will need to explain your child’s illness many times to many professionals including school staff, as well as friends and other caregivers. Good support from other parents in the Alliance to Cure Cavernous Malformation community or your local special needs community can be helpful for you.

17) WHAT SHOULD I ASK MY DOCTOR?

If you don’t already know the answers to these questions, you may want to ask these at your next appointment and write the answers here.

WHAT SIZE IS THE CAVERNOUS MALFORMATION (CAVERNOUS ANGIOMA, CAVERNOMA)?
HOW MANY CAVERNOUS MALFORMATIONS DO I HAVE?
WHAT IS THE EXACT LOCATION OF THE CAVERNOUS MALFORMATION?
WHAT FUNCTIONS DOES THIS AREA OF THE BRAIN CONTROL?
DO THERE APPEAR TO BE ANY VENOUS OR OTHER MALFORMATIONS NEAR THE CAVERNOUS MALFORMATION?
DOES IT APPEAR TO HAVE BLED PREVIOUSLY?
IN YOUR OPINION, WHAT ARE THE CONDITIONS UNDER WHICH YOU RECOMMEND SURGERY TO REMOVE THIS CAVERNOUS MALFORMATION?
IF I HAVE ANOTHER BLEED, WHAT SYMPTOMS WOULD YOU EXPECT?

Please also consult our additional questions to ask your doctor about specific situations, like surgery.

18) HOW DO I COPE?

Receiving a diagnosis of cavernous malformation (cavernous angioma, cavernoma) in the brain or spinal cord for you or a loved one can be difficult and upsetting. No matter your level of medical involvement, you will require a period of adjustment to a “new normal” which will include a time of grieving for what has changed. A counselor or other mental health professional can help if you experience emotional difficulty that interferes with your ability to get through your days. Close friends and family may have difficulty understanding, particularly if you don’t appear ill. The Alliance to Cure Cavernous Malformation online community or one-on-one peer support can be helpful as you look for others who share your issues.

19) ARE THERE OTHER WAYS I CAN BE SAFER?

Request a CD with your most recent MRI and a printed copy of the radiology report. This is good to have with you when you travel and in case of an emergency. You may also want to wear a medical alert bracelet indicating you have a condition that can cause a brain hemorrhage. Finally, you can have your medical information in more detail on your cellphone. Some cellphones offer apps that emergency personnel can access even when your phone is locked.

20) WHAT DOES ANGIOMA ALLIANCE OFFER PATIENTS AND FAMILIES?

Our mission is to inform, support, and empower those affected by cavernous malformation (cavernous angioma, cavernoma) and drive research for better treatments and a cure.
PATIENT INFORMATION: Alliance to Cure Cavernous Malformation provides extensive information on our website and in our newsletter. We announce new research findings as they are published. We host patient conferences with presentations by disease experts. You can view these at any time on our YouTube channel.
PATIENT SUPPORT: Alliance to Cure Cavernous Malformation offers patient support through Facebook, facilitated video conferences, and through our local Community Alliances. At our patient conferences, we offer time for attendees to share their stories.
GENETIC TESTING: Alliance to Cure Cavernous Malformation offers free genetic testing to individuals with multiple cavernous malformations who can’t get coverage through their insurance.
OPPORTUNITIES TO PARTICIPATE IN RESEARCH: Alliance to Cure Cavernous Malformation has a patient registry where you can sign up to be notified about research studies, including clinical drug trials, that are recruiting. We also are collaborators in multiple projects that are exploring the impact of the illness on patient’s quality of life.
CLINICAL CENTERS: Alliance to Cure Cavernous Malformation has a growing network of recognized Clinical Centers that provide expert multi-disciplinary care.
AWARENESS EVENTS: We sponsor volunteer-organized awareness opportunities around the country including community walks. In addition to these patient and family activities, Alliance to Cure Cavernous Malformation sponsors the annual International CCM Scientific Meeting, which brings together researchers from around the world. We provide consultations to assist with their clinical drug trial planning.

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2024.02.01 11:36 obblonge Laura's Story, Part One by The Prophet Obblonge

Waves.
Sometimes things propagate as waves.
She found this moth(rat?)-eaten manual fromma time not ours that mentioned this. That was before the invaders came. It may as well be centuries ago. There were stores that sold candies then. Wrapped in cellophanes of every color of the rainbow. What I'd give for something sweet now...
The sky is grey. Its always a shade of grey now. Sometimes lighter, during the day, I guess, orran ashen smeared easel offan irrational pantheon of uncaring gods and goddesses. We've been walking in what we assume is the same direction for at least two weeks. Following the river, keeping it to our left. At least we know we're not walking in circles. There's always an unnatural sound, like a sweeping broom across the tiled entranceway to Hell, that is present over the rushing water. Maybe that's why we stay close to the flowing - it almost blocks out the new world we have found ourselves in. Some semblance offa documentary on nature we might have seen when young and entertainment and learning were possibilities. There aren't many animals anymore. The ones that catch our peripherals are as ashen as the sky. Funny. I don't recall seeing foxes before; not in person. How long have we really been picking our way along this rocky terrain?
Laura is ahead of me, carrying a long bamboo walking stick. Sometimes when I lie and smile I tell her that's sposta help one walk. She lies and smiles back that of course its helping her walk - if I keep it horizontal it functions assif I'm onna tightrope - look, I'm inching between downtown skyscrapers!
An explosion in the distance, probably building sized. Sounds don't travel as far as they used to. All the greyness that came with Them is heavy, a wet blanket on the Earth, makes breathing a chore if one pays attention. The last buildings we saw were three-quarters immersed in the river. What is this body of water called? How does one forget what the local river is named? The same way one forgets what one's first car was, or where one's first kiss took place. Drive-in? Couch? Under bleachers? The explosion must be far enough to not be an immediate concern. No underfoot rumblings. We barely look up, in fact. We decided that attempting to track our progress in terms of direction was boring and pointless. Its not assif there issa goal we're reaching, a dot onna map that hassa printed name next tooit. In fact, the farther away we stay from those former dots on maps the better. Out here in the Great Big Fucking State Park of Wherever The Fuck We Are its peaceful enough. No former right angles to remind us that there are no straight lines in nature. Can't remember the last time I waited forra red light.
I'm catching up to Laura, she's crouching, long stick still horizontal, picking at something on or in the ground with her sawtoothed machete. There's no movement in the treeline except the branches and leaves themselves. Birds are almost non-existent now. I swear I don't ever recall seeing a fox in the flesh before, now they're the most common animal besides us. As I reach the limestone platform she spins, triumphant, see-I-told-you-the-stick-works, and holds out a bottle of Jamaican Red Stripe, looking new and shiny. Her excavation has unearthed a blue and white Igloo cooler chest from between boulders. Its full of formerly imported beers, a couple of red wax-encased wheels of cheese and luckily unopened large packets of bison jerky.
Back when people milled like ants, endlessly constructing ventilation tunnels and waste depositories, they believed things. They had up to the minute holy documents crisscrossed with squiggly imaginary lines, like all holy documents. Wherever one found oneself in relation to the imaginary lines denoted certain realities. Foxes are more common than people now. Somewhere Walt Disney is not feeling irony. Sometimes those holy imaginary lines were rivers. People's most common trait was laziness. I remember viewing a satellite picture of Earth, and it seemed the only blue water left was that being fed the indigo stain for denim inna polluted tributary adjacent in what was China. So much holiness. When the need arose for things bigger than us to assist, those holy worshipped things, they remained as invisible and ineffectual as ever. The larger than our imaginations entities that did show themselves remained indifferent to our collective sigils and crossed hearts. These giants brought with them a new Art, a new way to draw lines on maps, and new definitions of what maps were. Blue is still the least common color of water, brown and red being much more favored. Faces old and young stare accusingly from just beneath the surface tensions now, no matter what the hue of the liquid. The Earth is somehow a quieter marble now, explosions less frequent. If one were being charitable one could say the new, gigantic forms had brought peace, finally, at last. The answers to so many prayers.
Light pollution is now an antiquated term. Sagan's billions and billions twinkle sparkle flash and swoosh above our heads now if our relative elevation to the sea is great enough. I am no eidetic astrologer, but Laura agrees that Orion's belt and Betelgeuse are no longer where they were. Or maybe obscured by clarity. Perhaps eventually we'll draw new imaginary lines in the night grey and link humanistic tragedies to them. That one's Boffo, the legendary fox masturbator, see his right hand has six fingers? And there's Yourmom, still popular as ever. Some of the stellar regions make audible strings of intermittent noises, attempting to ask our obsolete fax machines tooa matinee. At least they're not selling us used cars yet. I wonder, would that make us scramble nowhere faster or drag our feet? The dead do not walk the globe. Hooded skeletons do not ride pale horses in search of wheat fields. It is possible something with many arms dances to an idiot piper. We smoke 'em if we got 'em, and we usually do. Drugs were big business, and are more commonly laying around than cans of cranberry sauce. They brought peace on Earth with Them, and an end to poverty, however one measures it. And they didn't even demand praise.
We haven't seen any other people in at least two weeks. Not alive, anyway. Most of the corpses are floating in pieces unidentifiable down past us. Any former homes by the waterfront have been abandoned. Proximity to the new vast creatures does something to the thought processes. Makes the electrons jump track and wind up in the wrong brain receptors. They're not eating us. They're not even interacting with humanity unless we en masse attack them. Nukes were used. That was the last Laura and I heard. The largest groups of people we've seen were four, across the river. They made no sign of recognition, no waves or yells. A mutual noticing. They were headed the way we came, on the other side.
We've stopped at a two story home with a boatless dock. A fire has turned the former garage into ash, but the adjacent kitchen and walk-in pantry is still full of groceries. Sandwich creme cookies with evaporated milk on the master bedroom deck. Sheets still smell like scented detergent and the water still gurgles from the faucets when they're turned. No electricity. Those electrons don't do the same things either. The long drive leading up to the structure is buried under massive fallen pines. Debris clogs the river itself, using a boat seemed useless, as if there was a destination to speed away to. Laura calls it " Fort mumbleblarrg " , exhaustedly burying her head in a couch cushion laid out on the deck. I stuff more cookies between my teeth. The view provided of the terrain from the deck looks like an angry child shook the ant farm, and bored, tossed it away inna drainage ditch outside a seafood buffet inna resort town. My skin imagines it has been coated in egg and floured batter several times. Shaking the sludge off my head I collapse on the unmade bed by the sliding glass, very seriously stained doors.
[ they severed the hands that's what the Spaniards did. Halberded piles palms up
fires not cauterizing, smudging
glints of spittled grin thick lenses calloused fingers zipping up weatherbeaten
blood, from not yet a teenager
cotton briars, green bitterness
whens
please not again]
Fort Mumbleblarrg seems as good as any place to experience intense hallucinations and/or time slips and/or simultaneous dimensional realities. It has cookies. After dragging all the usable foodstuffage up to the master bedroom suite atop the remnants of the wooded structure and making use of the handily, almost obscenely organized tools to actually um, fortify the narrow stairwell, we immediately crash near comatose for days, ingesting sugars and fats like there were supermarkets with humming freezer sections on every city intersection. This place even has a wine cellar, a real one, not a glass doored cabinet. I am almost disappointed there is no cask of Amontillado.
On the fourth day another explosion, still far enough to not feel blasted heat or earthquaking floorboards, but it trails along with it a visible atmospheric channel that spins off like the arm offa hurricane. For hours all the colors in the spectrum become grimy, unctuous, the view from the bottom of a fast food fryer overdue for straining. Nausea sets in during and afterward. All offa sudden being onna carpet is the same as lying face down inna two inch deep tray of cultivated maggots, complete with crawling movements up the walls and greenish-grey waves lighting up the flatscreen of the now-defunct television across from the bed. Huddled in the center, trying desperately not to touch or even look at the floor while convulsively emptying our bowels and stomachs, the mouldering lightshow starts to produce three dimensional effects, coming closer then sinking in far past the wall its mounted on.
Blankness. Grey. Millipedes. Water still runs, still looks clear. All of the carpet gets torn out and heaved over the deck's railing, along with the sodden mattress. Mumbleblarrg wassa perfect title, man. From the deck a three foot wide stripe is clearly visible across the landscape. Straight from our perspective, disappearing into the horizon, a charred, still smoking narrow strip of burnt. Trees that formerly stood in its path are simply gone, not piles of twisted branch stubs and ash. Gouges in the limestone, an actual scraping it seems. Smell of overripe, rotting fruit, something exotic like ugli or dragon with an artificial sweetener aftertaste in the nostrils; acrid, bulbous decay accelerated by molecular science students proud of their work. Evidence of this is visible in the river itself - a darkened stripe underneath the waterflow which now eddies at the banks. Added to the evidence of former civilization already present in the water are the carcasses of fish, or fish-like creatures, at least. Its difficult to discern what the original shapes of the savagely torn chunks of flesh might have been. The entire column of moving water is black and brown and maroon and bright fire truck red. There issa small fire burning on the opposite shore. Impossible to tell what exactly, just a blur of burning. For the moment there is a wind, steady, away from us. Blessedly, away from us.
Laura usedta tell stories about being born onna side offa river I was not. I was born on an Air Force base in Texas. This is not that river. It doesn't look familiar to either of us. We don't know what its called, or was called. I had lived in Texas for all but four of forty-three years. I have never seen a fox except on screens, maybe a billboard. Now they're like neighborhood dogs. The trees, the grasses, they're familiar, but not intimately so. What are all these foxes eating? What stopped eating all the foxes and let their population burgeon? Laura says since that last wave she has a scar missing. It was to the side of a bone in her wrist, she got it while working inna field with her mother assa child. I don't remember for sure - its not my wrist, but I believe her. Neither of us can relate to the other how we got here, and when we attempt it again the story breaks down at maybe a different point. The last memory we have that stays the same is that we were both inna friend's car driving up to the convenience store a mile from my parents' old trailer. Then... Even when telling our own stories over again they change. At least that's what the other person claims.
There is plenty of packaged, indestructible food left. Some of the vintages are over sixty years old. We start on those just because. I stick a sewing needle through one of the corks and float it inna bowl of water. It doesn't seem to do anything in particular, which means I've probably forgotten a step in compass making. Best as I can tell we're headed vaguely north. Absolutely nothing I have observed points definitively to that conclusion. For now this is as good a place as any.
Contrary to most horror movie logic there are several battery powered devices fully charged, more or less, and picking up all kinds of stations. Allot of them are preprogrammed and safeguarded against any possibility that silence could happen, lest our listeners disappear. There are no live voices, though even the public station is replaying an interview with a United Nations ambassador intermittently with blocks of humming where the local station breaks would be. Neither of us recognize any of the station call letters or frequencies. Even the fifty thousand watt WOAI transmission is absent. Quickly we settle on the classical public broadcast, coming in surprisingly clear. It is the only one playing music without lyrics exclusively. It helps make all the alien noises more tolerable. When stars are visible focussing one's attention on a certain grouping will now cause them to actually respond - both with sounds and visual effects. Its not just our poor human senses - recordings on our phones document the phenomena in even greater detail. Clear enough skies to see past the grey are rare, but at least two infinite directions yield beautiful results. I name them after Greek sirens in my head, not wanting to be outwardly anymore pessimistic than the situation demands. Most stars are silent and stationary enough. For now. There is still one sun in the sky that seems to do the same thing it used to, even though its greyed out usually. Maybe tomorrow it will offer two scoops of raisins.
And. Aspirin in the aftermath of wine. We've been here four or five days and just now notice that there are no identifying traces at all of who once lived here. No photos framed. No mail magnetted to the refrigerator door. No kids' homework, or children's toys at all. There are true crime and mystery novels. No religious items. There are also no clothes hanging in closets or folded in drawers. Like we interrupted the crew dressing the set.
The audio stream changes from madrigals to Gregorian chants. Its still less memory invoking than pop songs of love gained and lost and sex. We've noshed through most of the sugars and salts and fats and have begun opening cans of vegetables and beans. Laura reminds me she's a Mormon and I pick up the old argument that no, she is not. My father attended a seminary in Michigan to become a priest before he joined the Air Force assa chaplin and married a paranoid schizophrenic, what the Roman Catholic church labels a possession case officially. I like to get drunk and talk about religion and politics. When I carried a wallet it contained separate business cards for ghost and demon removal services. My reasoning being that demons are way more dangerous than the cranky old fartbag of Aunt Mabel bitching about your choice of cat food for Mr. Snuggles, and should be priced accordingly. My first official girlfriend assa teenager working at Wendy's wassa Mornon, so I have slightly more than a cursory familiarity of the doctrine. Worst girlfriend ever, by the way. Never kiss a girl who doesn't smoke. Its okay if she doesn't smoke anymore, but this advice, I contend, will not let one down if heeded. As the topic of baptizing ancestors breaches again the sky visible past the open sliding glass door abruptly shifts from grey to palish green. Notta seafoam orra seasick orra pea, but a shade reserved for floors of state mental hospitals, disinfectant ready and climbing the edges of the walls. There is something else that is different. Laura and I exchange searching looks, interrupted in our comfort food conversation. We sit staring at each other forra solid minute before knitting our eyebrows and proceeding out on the deck. The atmosphere is physically thicker past the doorframe. Not more humid - the air is cool and moist, but no more so than before. Heavier. Gravity is still a theory. Although we confidently launch rockets and probes and parasail we assa species are still uncertain as to whether gravity issa push orra pull. Gravity now feels like its the ocean, waves jostling in all directions. A propagating wave packet, my head insists. I can't hear the rushing sound of the river. At all. Nor the wind visibly moving the branches strung above. The radio is unaffected. I am not. The last thing I remember when I awake is opening my mouth, partially full of cooked peppered yellow squash, and screaming. Silently.
[ thousand segmented legs crawling
the monsters took her under cover of sunlight and treason I can't remember what she was wearing
rough hewn metals jagged under nails into nerve-riddled flesh, rusted dirt filled channels
you were there to nurture but instead you consumed until bloated and gaseous
unstable at this temperature NO!
claimed divinity with hives and fever, royal pink and chartreuse
steaming exhalations horses breath
they spasmed fits and palsy
perspiration to the soil
which grew poisoned flowers from their tears
the limb twisted before the hinged joint borne unto the Firmament unmade
flutes whistling graveyard breezes
sounds are vibrations
sinusoidal dips and troughs and peaks and valleys
how many decimalled hurts?]
There issan aching in the back of my skull. No cartoon birds and stars halo. Rising from my face-up prone position on the freshly painted deck, Laura is first in my field of vision, back solidly pressed against the railing, her eyes wide and staring. Settling next to her while rubbing my nape, I dig in my pocket and fish out Ann's antique silver cigarette case. Taking two Camels out I offer one widdershins, quickly accepted. The black and gold lazer etched Zippo fails to click when struck but lights both. Baroque woodwinds and harpsichord is quarteting through the filthy sliding glass doors. It is the only sound. I dreamt of my daughter Kallisti. I have no idea where she is or if she is. Burnt ash drops without crackles, being shaken off by my trembling lips. Hot tears are streaming down, blurring the soundless vista with eloquent soundtrack. I haven't seen Kallisti since she was eight. She would be ten now. Her mother abandoned us when she was two anda half, chasing heroin and cocaine with prostitution and psychopathic apathy. I don't remember dropping the finished butt or crawling to the pallet on the floor underneath the speakers. Batteries still holding out. Harpsichord and oboes give way to four cellos, dirge. Its suiting of the moment. Red wine has not helped the aching of my head. Laura's face is turned from my view, surveying silent scenery fit forra hotel wall painting. This is where you could be instead of MotorLodge #164. There is no chocolate mint on your pillow. Do not use blacklights in the vicinity of your bedspread, please and thank you. End of song, end of consciousness.
Floor shakes hard enough to propel me to my feet. Wagner's Ride of the Valkyries is blasting through the speakers, but its too loud, absurdly loud, there's no way cones that size could make that much air move. Fuck this. Quick steps and noiseless slamming of the glass door. Thankfully the music diminishes in volume somewhat with this action. Its nighttime now. Laura is standing at the railing, one hand gripping the wood with enough force to turn her knuckles white, the other solidly around the ornate neck offa wine bottle labelled in Portuguese. She turns her head, frowning, only slightly, acknowledging my presence, then returns her sentry's position to the heavens. Half of the grey is parted centrally, revealing the new map of burning stars. Tens or thousands of minutes later Wagner dissolves into what would have been a station break, now the amplified buzzing offan ultraviolet bug zapper with two dragonflies struck frying in the mesh. This allows the only other sounds audible through to our senses: sirens calling from beyond Earth, skyward. A sort of synthetic chime set, microtuned at random and played by feasting vultures onna weighted keyboard. There is something new this time - a long, lilting, occasionally harmonized chorus of voices drifting in and out from a different point of night than the chimes, almost sideways from the horizon. If it is a language it is none I recognize, though there are definitely parts repeating verse-chorus-verse. Many vowels, few consonants. Hours pass. The buzzing from the radio fades to nothingness leaving us with the calling of the stars. The chimes span about two octaves. The voices, if that's what they are, full spectrum. There are most certainly repeating themes, though mismashed between competing chorales. All of the voices are distinctly female, the epitome offan archtype of warrior class. A third distinct group sounds angrier than the first two, threatening. No, bitch, our dance moves slay your tired, weak-ass trots. Its beautiful, as much as it can be, but my ears are accustomed to atonality. Also very directional. The voices are coming from horizontal sources, maybe on the planet, while the chimes are beaming from a gyrating cluster of suns directly above our heads. I find that I don't care how my dehydrated body feels about this decision: I am getting as drunk as I can before a red graped woman's hand closes the staring eyes of my corpse.
" There is nothing new under the sun " somebody said once. Probably a guy. That's the kind of smug bullshit men get quoted saying. Fuck that guy. I'm glad he's dead. I hope it hurt the whole time. By all means, quote me on that.
The darkness of night is lasting longer than it should. When I climb in the upstairs shower the water again thankfully runs clear. Its cold and wakes me up, though I'm still staggering drunk. Drinking in stomachfulls of water I emerge humming a companion piece to the concert around us. At least, I'm vibrating my throat and chest. It feels like what making sounds used to do. We've laid out couch cushions covering most of the deck and are observing. Writing onna legal pad witha pen screenprinted Al's plumbing, Laura says it feels like noon. We've been dosing off in turns. She suggests Father Alien instead of Mother Nature. Our three local groups of singers have played through at least two albums of repeating hits. I turned off the radio, though it didn't respond immediately, stubbornly buzzing at least an hour after the off command was issued. My vintage is 1973, something in French. Saltine crackers, spray cheese inna can. I keep thinking about Mitch Hedberg's joke about it glowing in the dark, every bite. The chimes have almost completely faded, along with the brightness and location of its point of emanation. Glee club is picking up the tempo, but seemingly content with their distant concert halls. When I heavily plop down the notepad is passed over. Two words: Foxes. Below. Laura is strategically stationed under the thick fringed vinyl umbrella that formerly stood in the center offa round glass table next tooa propane cookstove. On its side its functioning assa lean-to tent. Hanging my head over the railing, my eyes are greeted with twenty to thirty smaller shiny pairs staring back. Ashen grey and brownish-red foxes are doing much the same as we are, minus alcohol. Laura hands me a bag of marshmallows and we toss them down one by one. They look cute, smiling almost. I shiver. Laura tugs at my jacket and I join her on the other side of the lean-to. We stuff marshmallows in our ears, hoping we don't wake to find ants crawling, searching through our brains.
Something is tickling my face and smells like bubblegum. Opening my sleepshut eyes I discover an orange fox on my chest, staring directly at me. It licks my nose several times and is instantly gone when a peal of gravelly smoker's laughter erupts from beside me. Some giant, probably taloned hand has turned the volume knob of the world back to the right again. Trees, river, that sweeping, scratching noise, all back. I haven't seen Laura happy, even briefly, like this since we found ourselves wandering. The little furry scamp ate the marshmallows out of her ears too, she says. For minutes it is easier to breathe, even with the obligatory cigarette smoke. Happiness is rare now, has been for years. Just a little reminds my body what its like to be alive. Lighter grey, occluded sky. Something like morning has arrived, however late. The same clawed huge fingers changed the world's gear ratio back to where it was. We're spinning...I see a flash of memory instead of what my eyes report. My autistic daughter spinning herself dizzy holding a ribbon, a glittery one, inches thick, sparkles fluttering. Quickly I pretend to cough and turn away, holding my closed fist in front of my face. There is no need to spoil whatever semblance of humanity is left in us by sharing this thought. " I'll make breakfast! Something hot! " She knocks the umbrella over leaping up like a clumsy feline. Burying my face in the rough cushions, I bite down on the material covering the foam, thankfull to be out of view.
Breakfast is handmade tortillas, generic, mechanically separated beef fromma squat can, diced tomatoes, black beans, corn. Blue rings of flames perform the chemistry on command. All the exciting little kid junk food has been torn through, leaving stacks of stolid, adult canned rations. There is plenty of wine. At first discovery I advised Laura not to quaff the ones that read " Port ". A friend's favorite author was Jack Kerouac. He mentioned more than thrice getting drunk on port wine. Turns out that's code for alcoholic cherry snow cone syrup. Which did provide me with the line " Man, I ain't shit my pants since I was twenty-seven! " For the record, my favorite author is HP Lovecraft. My takeaway was never, ever swim or float on, in, near, or near a painting of the ocean. Better include lakes to be sure. And iffit doesn't have fins reconsider your menu choice.
Considering the condition of the world around us we had immediately abandoned our lifelong commitment to living green and recycling. Throwing our refuse over the wooden railing wasn't an issue that required debate or reconsidering. Fort Mumbleblarrg, upon our commandeering, quickly became unfit to impress visiting colonels. Both of us passed out underneath the tilted umbrella, she under a thin blanket and I sporting a hideous shower curtain that was most certainly someone's stolen memento offa naughty liaison, the grey above us got brighter and dimmed. My eyebrows knitted upon being disturbed. Is today Wednesday? Forgot to set the cans out on the curb. Shitgoddamnmotherbitch the old couple two doors down are alcoholics. They're green container is full of-
Slowly raising my head and torso from the seat cushions I have the conscious thought that I really don't want to know what is making that waste management noise underneath my feet. I am tired of acquiring knowledge. My head is full, thank you. Try again next year. Mayhap by then I'll have finally succeeded in getting rid of those terrible '80s pop country lyrics that my parents thought would be useful to carry around with me for the rest of my life. Or that list of all the adverbs in the English language my frizzy-headed bitch offan AEGT teacher shoved in without permission. Then I'll have space for more data storage, but not now. Something is snorting and something is loudly crinkling. Maybe the social security office sent the wrinkly winos some of the CIA's cocaine stash covertly disguised as Sun Chips. They're humping furiously in the drainage ditch and feeling like teenagers again. That's sweet. Let 'em throw bottles and challenge life with a shaking skyward fist. She wassa cheerleader and he built an entire car from junkyard parts in Auto Shop. Their kid got dismembered five ways bya landmine, but that was at least six years ago. What-
Decking underneath vibrates as whatever is below us thuds against one of the support beams. A misty exhalation of partially digesting organic matter sprays into view on the other side of the railing. I still haven't sprung to my feet. Blood pressure hasn't come close to spiking. We all have our fetishes. Who am I to tell them what do after the evening news onna weekday? Can't believe you're poking me in the ribs to relate this story. Bullshit. You'll smile and wave when we drive by like always. A low, three second rumbling causes the deck to vibrate atta different wavelength. Fucking waves, man. No, I don't wanna go to the beach. They eat lots of cabbage and partake in excited conversations at mealtimes. They're passionate people. I am not getting out bed. That's what the largest sites on the internet are for. To see things like this whenever you wake up.
I. Am. Sleeping.
Go. Away.
Fuck. This.
Brown bears are smaller than black bears, which are in turn smaller than grizzlies. This one is grey. Its back sports the left arm and face offa human melted into it, off-center towards the animal's right flank. Impossible to tell if the face belongs tooa man or woman. Just the first two inches are showing, matted with the bear's greyed fur. The eyes are lidless and staring with tiny dots for pupils, pale brown eyes seeming to fade to grey with their surroundings. The left arm is active, flailing and grasping at anything that touches the palm momentarily. Mouth is slack, open, no tongue. I don't know how to judge how large the bear is. I think its bigger than a standard brown one, and I have no geographic clues. Fort Mumbleblarrg's newcomer is not okay with its tenants selfish policy of not sharing foodstuffs with the local wildlife, except insects. And its demanding toobe heard. I have been close tooa few brown bears before, seen pictures of the other ones, and I don't remember them having teeth this long and sharp. Jagged, like shark's teeth. At least they're not in rows. Huh. Whata strange thought.
An explosion, this one close enough to send flaming fist sized chunks of burning matter hailing down upon us and everything in sight. A searing blast of oven barrels directly sideways, transmuting the visible spectrum to the final day offa carnival, full of cheap plastic bottled whiskey, burnt sugar, understated menace, and malice overt. Both of us are thrown against the far railing. Almost losing consciousness, we scramble to toss several erupting couch cushions over the side before the rest of the upholstery ignites. The entire deck vibrates violently as the nightmare bear is thrown against the mooring posts, its jaws snapping several times like a shark's. A shriek far too reminiscent of human speech bellows from below. Laura is on her feet first, brandishing her sawtoothed machete but backing towards the sliding glass doors, one of which has cracked deeply but maintained its integrity. I follow her wide-eyed gaze to spy the offending creature coming into view as it woundedly staggers towards the riverbank. A two foot section of its rear flank is actively on fire, on the side opposite its unfortunate human addition. The human handed arm is flailing, fingers blurring. It becomes apparent that the unsettling sounds its making are also coming from the face enmeshed in the fur on its back. Unbelievably I find myself fascinated, unable to take in any other stimuli. Trailing an stench part burning hair and part Texas BBQ, it tumbles headfirst over a rocky ledge and is swept splashing fetid mudwater with the current. I lose my stomach contents over the railing, tannin-rich and sharply red. Behind me, a clang resounds as the machete hits now bare wood slats and a sound much more disheartening than any our mutant visitor had uttered bursts from Laura's lungs.
[ charred glass and copper, poly-fill and stuffed animals' eyes, once alive with children's imagination now splattered with phlegm and dirt
carousel uneven creaks flashing ticking bulbs in the humid summer air
the disappointment in her eyes
parasites replacing fish tongues
many eyed the reproach
ifs, not whens
dovecote abandoned
sharp stab upon kneeling]
Fort Mumbleblarrg has grown more than a few charred scars on its outer walls and roof, but demurely extinguished itself on behalf of its pair of new occupants. Which is fortunate, since neither of us remembered the fire extinguishers under the kitchen sink, cabineted away from prying eyes until far too late for them to have done us any good. Our favorite perch of second story deck still holds our weight when we jump onnit, and gets a new coating of upholstered cushions, the aforementioned red spray cans taking sentry post at each corner. I use a jet-nozzled water hose to spray off or away any unpleasant remnants underneath. Taking stock of rations we find several weeks worth of gluttony still shelved, with far more wine than either of our stomachs will forgive us for. There are no other structures in view, at least nothing that could still be recognized assa structure, but we decide that an exploratory mission a bit farther down wouldn't hurt, spoiled as we are from all the junk food consumed previously. A search of the premises turns up no maps or information regarding our Fort's geographic relationship to anything else. There are no firearms either. Colors are still skewed unwholesomely. It is voted that any expedition for more supplies be held off until, well, something changes. The propane canister attached to the cookstove is full. Cans of ham and pork product, sliced potatoes, name brand government cheese. Add heat. Stir. Pass out from exasperated exhaustion. Maybe getta chance to repeat.
Tapioca morning. Beigeish-grey with lumps of sky pus. Just like mom usedta make, including streaks of burnt char floating here and there and everywhere. Colors have not returned to - previous? Browns are lighter tans. Blues are non-existent. Reds are darker, as are the lightest hues. Yellows are peppered mustard. Greens are in the army now. It is observed the wind direction has been generally the same as far back as we recall starting this trip. Which keeps a fairly consistent speed forra weather pattern. When my father died I found a notebook embossed with a gold US Air Force Chaplaincy seal dated 1974 that he had partially filled with the weekly rainfall amounts on our half acre property for fourteen years. He would watch the Weather Channel non-stop. And that was some of the more interesting data tables meticulously recorded. Weekly expenditures on groceries, including exciting annotations, such as the BX discontinuing their brand of generic grade " A " cigarettes. Monthly lottery totals - spent, won, and lost. If I were writing all of this down assan account of my life during what most surely is the final chapters, this would be the most horrific part. As I had such a meteorological inspiration at home, the specific scientific study of weather was not one of my favorites. My brain stubbornly insists nevertheless that a constant, unchanging wind pattern is not only wholly unnatural but surely cataclysmic. Of course it is. And not even top five on my probable events to be concerned about list.
Laura uses a plastic folding stepladder to climb onto the roof, easily attaining the peak. After about a minute she yells that she can see two more similarly constructed roofs further up the riverbank, hiding silent and ominous amidst the pines. The one closest looks like it took a direct hit fromma meteor, maybe recently. I don't ask why she thinks that and she doesn't explain. Also reported is the absence of anything else. Sliding down the shingles directly to the deck she takes the gutter with her to the floor. Triumphantly. I applaud.

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2024.01.20 15:18 Demonicking101 Chak and Shida Save Christmas [Part 8!]

Part 8: You’re a nice one, Mr. Zithra
[Poster]
[First Part] ; [Previous Part] -Ten Minutes Earlier-
“Let! Us! Go!” Ash shouted in a resentful demand at the green monster blocking the tower exit.
“After you answer my questions.” Zithra countered, his furry arms crossing firmly, “What are these ‘aliens’ you mentioned? Be absolutely clear with descriptions.”
The three kids looked to one another with uncertainty, but as his friends locked onto him to take the lead Zach cleared his throat.
“We watched them step out of their U.F.O after they… crashed into Santa…” he explained.
“Like one of those tacky rooftop Santa’s? Or an inflatable lawn one?” Zithra asked as his long curling eyebrows bunched at his brow.
Zach blinks, a bit surprised an alien would know all about Christmas decorations, let alone who Santa even referred to.
“Uhm… the real one. They took his magical sack and everything.” the teen elaborated.
A tired thrumming released out of the monster’s chest as he rolled his eyes.
“You all seem a little too old for- Whatever. So some poor mall Santa got squished. What did these aliens look like? Like me?” Zithra pressed, pointing a tail claw at himself.
Zach shook his head, which immediately granted Zithra an immense noticeable sense of relief.
“We weren’t super close… But one kinda looked like a normal person, but with a cat-like tail. The other looked like… a…” Zach said, struggling to think of something comparable.
“A cow?” Ash offered up.
“I thought it kinda looked more like a sheep. You know, because of the white hair.” Tony said as he rubbed the back of his head.
“Cows can be white too, boogerfart…” Ash grumbled.
“Cows are spotted!” Tony argued.
“Cartoon cows maybe!” Ash snapped.
A loud Thump rattled the floor from the monster’s tail.
“Quiet. Cows can be a variety of colors. Glad to see that the local school system is doing just fine.” Zithra mumbled as he racked his mind to recall any species that matched those basic descriptions.
“So aliens do abduct cows! Like in the movies!” Tony accused.
“No, we don’t. I’ve had to steal one or two to survive over the years, but that’s besides the point… And that has nothing to do with the current situation so again… be quiet!” Zithra growled in annoyance by the incessant noise.
The cat-tailed human-looking species rang absolutely no bells, but a faint recollection of a species that semi-resembled what these teens were describing came to mind. Some sort of mammalian-insectoid right?
“Wait. Years?” Zach interjected into Zithra’s train of thought.
“I’ve been here since the sixties, you see. Living as a resident of this world. There was nowhere else for me to be. It was a plan I long ago unfurled.” Zithra explained in annoyed frustration, the sensitivity of his ears hitting him in the nerves harder than usual.
“Uhm… Nice rhyme?” Zach said to the unnaturally formed sentences the monster just made.
Before Zithra could respond to that, the child with the extra poofy coat blurted out once more.
“The sixties!? Does that mean you were what crashed at Roswell!?” He asked excitedly.
Now just feeling bad for the kid at this point, Zithra took a moment to center himself.
“No. Roswell was in the forties. Nothing to do with me. And it was probably just a stupid balloon.” he replied bluntly, more so to ensure his words didn’t get forced into a lazy rhyme structure, “Seriously, have you not opened a single book?”
“Can we go now? We answered your questions, right?” Ash asked.
“Yes. But I have one quick question that I doubt you can answer. But on my GPS I’ve noticed that this whole area and town are not-” Zithra froze in place like a statue, his ear plumes twitching. The blank expression on his face swiftly turned to concern just before a window to his side shattered.
A bullet from a hunting rifle just glanced by his torso and through his wing’s membrane. His rageful shriek accompanied by the screams of the teenagers rang out before more shots came hailing in.
“Get to the floor!” he shouted as he casted his wings above them to help the kids drop.
Focusing in, he could sense a wide surrounding force of armed humans positioning themselves around the tower at a distance. Many of which were officers of the law.
Cursing at the encoding as the culprit that probably set off this ludicrously violent behavior, Zithra suddenly smelled distinct caustic burning… and fresh human blood.
“ZACH!”
-Present time-
Bang!
Bang-bang!
Skidding down a snowbank Zithra narrowly dodged whizzing bullets from behind him. In his arms was one of the three children that had invaded his temporary home and spoke of others from the stars. The humans seemed to not hesitate to open fire into his tower, and his wing-membrane was a poor shield for the youth named ‘Zach’.
He had to abandon the tower to draw the danger away from the other two, but only he was fast enough to get this child to a medical facility in time.
Pressing the wound securely, Zithra snarled as the spreading fire greatly covered over the sounds of his pursuers. Limiting his range.
“I know it hurts, I’m sorry. It’s okay Zach. No need to worry. I’ll take you back.” he assured as the teen cried out from the jostling dive.
Before he could be pinned down, he dashed onward. Instantly more shots followed after him. He hadn’t been pursued like this since the 80’s, but he was resourceful if not stubborn.
Bounding up with a flap on his wings he lurched up into the trees to disappear in the blanket of haze and smoke. Branch to branch he cursed the humans who accidentally set his tower ablaze. The other children got out in time, but something caused the flames to spread as if the cold and snow meant little. It made no sense, but here he was in the thick of it.
His ears twitched as he heard something slice through the air above him. What was that?
Dropping back down into cleaner air the kid started to cough and gasp. But at least they lost whoever was shooting at them so recklessly.
Dashing through the snow, with the assist of his wings he felt a bitter sting. But he had to keep going. Town wasn’t that far. He could make it, drop this pipsqueak off at the hospital and run like mad. He can do it. He can-
He stopped in his tracks as he saw something he never expected to ever see through a patch of smokeless sky… A flying pallet truck…!? With a Santa dressed cat woman at its helm!? Death must have been near, or the smoke suffocated his brain more than he expected it to.
Before his very eyes, the strange sight began to turn in mid-air, behaving like it was always meant to fly as it levitated at the speed of a jet-engine. Now barreling straight towards him, he could do little more than stare, as his limbs had no time to catch up to his brain’s realization of danger. However, before the end could be spelled out for him by a crash, the absurd vehicle was once again torn around, almost immediately coming to a sideways halt, with the deceleration causing a shockwave that sent a near tidal-wave of snow crashing into the surrounding trees, extinguishing big parts of the fire and leaving behind a hazy mist of water vapor, smoke and aerosolized snow. Yet somehow, that very same shockwave had somehow spared him and the kid its wrath.
From up top the hovering truck, piercing eyes glared down at him, seeming to somehow be more surprised at his sight than he was at the flying cat-Santa.
“A manarian?!” the strange feline yelled out at first, before her eyes apparently found the child in his arms. Her face turning to anger, she loosened the grip of one of her hands on the handle of her unreal vessel, swinging it around to point what was clearly some form of firearm in his direction.
“I don’t know what you’re doing here, but you will leave that kid alone!” she announced threateningly, leveling the sights of the weapon right onto his head.
“And you are not one, nor are you of Earth. I beg you this is not my fun, help this child he is more worth!” Zithra pleaded, lifting the teen up, still keeping pressure on the gunshot wound, “Humans here are insane, completely without reason. They shoot with nothing to gain, take this mother’s son!”
In a bit of panic and a lot of frustration that his words now of all times weaved in poorly constructed rhymes, he snarled and used his tail to hit his own bullet wound to send a surge of sobering pain to his brain. In a sharp screech he tried again.
“I don’t know your species, but you clearly know mine! But listen. I am partially at fault for this, but these kids came into my hiding spot and I tried to tell them to leave but then they mentioned ‘aliens’ so I held them to question. I thought my people returned, you must know the gravity of my concern. The humans found us and just started firing their guns like mad! The other kids are fine if not scared a tad. Please, I didn’t want youths to actually get hurt! But this one is of the highest alert. Take him to the hospital! You seem nominal! H-his name is Zach, h-he is the more dire victim of this attack.” he pleaded in perfect human English -rhymes aside- as he held the child out.
Shida found it a bit hard to believe as the scourge of the galaxy pleaded to her. However, the kid had been shot, and he didn’t appear to be carrying any weapons.
She also couldn’t overlook the protective way in which the Manarian had carried the child…or his own wounds.
Torn between her options for only a moment, she quickly sighed.
“Doodle!” she ordered with a snap of her fingers and pointed at the kid. “Make sure he’s alright.”
Then, she stuffed her weapon away into the recesses of her costume, before leaning low and reaching out her hands.
“You don’t look too good yourself,” she said, as the elf floated the kid up with a snap of his fingers that caused sparkles to carry the wounded child to the safety of the ‘sleigh’. “Hop on. Maybe I can’t take you to the hospital like the kid, but we can at least have a look at your wounds. Staying here likely wouldn’t end well for any of us.”
“Thank you… Honestly the bullets hurt real mean… but I’m more mad that I’m green.” Zithra cackled in relief as he accepted the strange savior’s offer.
“I KNEW IT!” a voice echoed out, followed by more gunshots.
Zithra expanded his wings to provide a visual cover for the others of this magic piece of labor equipment. A few holes tear through his left membrane, thankfully missing the others.
“Let’s go!” he snarled, biting back the pain.
His command was of course unneeded. Amazingly as Zithra looked back for a second, he could watch how one of the bullets heading for them seemingly slowed to a crawl in mid-air, and then apparently began to fly backwards. Of course, the projectile was not really losing speed. They were simply moving so incredibly fast that its momentum was like less than nothing when compared. And yet he felt barely any force pulling on him as they sped along.
Within mere moments, they had left the forest behind them and circled towards the town.
“Can you get him inside?” Shida asked, turning towards the elf who still held the human boy. Doodle simply nodded and snapped again, before jumping off the sleigh along with the child while covering himself in some sort of glimmering mist, concealing most of his presence as he went to sneak the wounded boy into the medical facility he had been a patient in himself just a while ago. At least he seemed to be taking this seriously.
“I also never signed up to be Santa…” Shida mumbled as a comment on the Manarian’s earlier statement, while she quickly pulled out her phone to warn Chak and Dagon not to go anywhere near the mountains, and to meet her at Dagon’s rental instead. “Could be that the darn magic somehow got you as well. Unless you recently fell into a huge kettle of hair-dye.”
“Magic?... Heh… Now ain’t that something.” Zithra responded in panting breaths, the rhyme-attack seemingly passed, “I frosted my tips in the 90’s… but this is a bit much, even for me.” he huffed, wrapping his tail to the flying ‘craft’ to secure himself in an upright position.
Shida exhaled slowly.
“Do you have any idea how little ‘the 90’s’ narrows anything down?” she asked with an agitated shake of her head, feeling torn between relief about getting the kid to safety and absolute burning fury at the humans who had put him in danger in the first place, although the weird reins that the Christmas Spirit had on her of course kept her from completely freaking out.
Still, she really wanted to yell at the idiot who just shot at her. And she was seconds away from reaching for her phone to do just that. However, after a moment of contemplation, she decided against it. It would do noone any good if they got themselves killed in that fire, as deserved as it might have been on their part. So she would refrain from distracting them for the time being, until she felt enough time had passed that they would’ve gotten themselves to safety using the opening that her stopping ‘sleigh’ had created for them.
Instead, she decided to further distract herself with her new guest.
“Well, anyway, I won’t lie: You’re a pretty unwelcome sight, if I’m being honest. Not that I have anything against Manarians on principle. Even got a manarian friend. Or, well…acquaintance. And yes, I know how that sounds,” she rambled on for a moment, before recentering herself and deciding that she didn’t need to justify herself to this guy. “Anyway, most of the time it still isn’t a very good sign to run into one of you. A bit of context as to what you’re doing here would therefore be pretty nice. I’ll refrain from threatening you with the fact that my aim is a lot better than that of those guys for the time being, because it seemed like you genuinely cared for the kid’s safety. But I’m still going to assume you have some hand in the planned invasion for the time being, unless you can give me a reason not to, how about that?”
“Short version? My name is Zithra. About sixty of this world's solar cycles -They just call them years here- ago, on what was supposed to be a stealth operation, me and another came to check on the human’s technological development. They far surpassed expectations, but I didn’t care. I fought like hell to have that career so that I could ram our ship into this planet and escape the Empire. I succeeded. Hasn’t been smooth sailing by any stretch of the imagination, but I found a life here. A life that’s hard, but at least I’m free. I get hostile run-ins with stray humans from time to time, but I have no real quarrel with them. I even try to keep up with their media entertainment.” the Manarian reported in a pained chuckle, before his mood shifted, “Clearly, something about this town is wrong, very very wrong. I was in the pacific northwest forests of the north american continent when suddenly it felt as though I walked right into northern canada. Suddenly there’s snow and my GPS stopped working and the most disturbing part is the further you try to go from this town, the less survivable it is. Less animals, trees, roads… just snow covered plains and I assume farmlands. Ah, right! Green. That just happened yesterday. One moment I’m setting myself up in a firewatch tower, the next I start sparkling and poof! Green!”
Shida exhaled slowly.
“You wouldn’t have happened to hear a loud crash right before that, would you?” she joked for a moment, before shaking her head and taking this more serious again. “Well, assuming you’re telling the truth, I guess I can respect that. I’m just not going to ask what happened to your partner. Also, I’ve been to Earth once so I’m not sure where…well then again, considering you’re here, this probably isn’t Earth but Terra instead…which was destroyed decades ago, if not centuries. I think saying something is wrong might be an extreme understatement.”
She made a snapping sound through clenched teeth while she thought. However, in the meantime, Doodle was already coming back.
“Did everything go well?” Shida asked, and the elf almost immediately nodded as he floated back onto the sleigh. Nodding back at him, Shida turned towards the discolored Manarian. “I’m not exactly sure about specifics around here, but I know someone who knows a lot more, so we’ll continue this conversation in a moment once we reached our current hideout. I can also take a look at your wounds there.”
Without waiting for much in terms of confirmation, Shida started to move the sleigh again, starting slow to give her passengers time to hang on before speeding off in the direction of the outskirts of the town.
The ocean of fancy lights between them rushed by in the blink of an eye, and soon they hovered on the outside of a lone house standing on the side of a wide road. Surprisedly, Shida noticed a very familiar car was parked in the driveway. She had no idea how in the world Dagon and Chak had managed to somehow arrive here before them, but at this point, she wasn’t really going to question it either.
Wordlessly, she ordered everyone to get off. Once the pallet truck was empty again, still hovering around Shida’s height in the air, she lifted her hand to gently tap against it with the tips of her fingers.
“Go home,” she ordered, and without a moment’s hesitation, the thing suddenly flung itself into the air and sped off into the night.
“Let’s go,” she then announced to her group. Although, as they reached the front door, she stopped for a second. “Actually, wait a moment.”
Leaving the now confused looking Zithra behind, she opened the door and hurried inside. Chak, who seemed to already be waiting for her, stood up in excitement, however Shida ignored her for the time being. Instead of greeting anyone, she merely reached out a flat hand, yelling ‘sack!’ into the room, which instantly made the little replica of the magical christmas sack that sat on a sideboard in the living room jump up from the surface and leap into her hand across the room. Easily catching it, she turned on the spot and swiftly walked outside again.
“Hold your breath,” she announced briefly while digging into the sack with her hand, and after giving the Manarian just enough time to comply, she threw a handful of the glittery powder at him, immediately covering him in a thick, sparkling cloud of magic, before doing the same with herself.
Zithra’s ears pulled back as he allowed it, scrunching his face at what looked like weird glitter being thrown at him. Having his own hatred for the stuff from his experiences in the 80’s. The horror of it never fully coming out and irritating his plumes for years afterwards.
“What is this?” he exhaled in a voice that resembled his but lacked its usual thrumming depth.
Dressed in a now quickly red-staining white shirt and dark red plaid jacket stood a human male looking to be in his late 30s or early 40s. His baggy jeans dragged through the snow as he sidestepped in growing pain.
His head and bearded facial hair remained green and spiky, but now in a much darker shade that could be mistaken as black at a squinted distance. Opening his eyes they are revealed to be a light almost golden brown with a hint of bloodshot in the whites.
He attempted to hug his aching torso with his wings and tail, but no such appendages currently existed.
“Wha-what? I feel… deafened…” he groaned as his white shirt’s two wet red strains grew more and more, pulling a pressing hand away he witnessed his blood coated hand, noticing the presence of a pinky digit, “Ahh… okay?”
Shida, now back in her human from with tanned skin and wavey hair, stepped out of her own dust-cloud and offhandedly threw another fistful of powder at Doodle, before stuffing the sack down her collar and taking Zithra by the wrist.
“Disguise Magic,” she informed as she began to drag the Manarian along. “Hope it helps against the encoding, at least a little bit. Looking like a Terran doesn’t always do much for it. Also looks like you’ve been hit worse than we thought.”
With that, she pulled him along into the house. By now, Chak had stood up and walked closer to the door while obviously trying to figure out what was going on, but Shida simply dragged Zithra past her and into the bathroom, where she could start trying to help out with his injuries.
“Who… Shida what’s-” Chak began to say before shaking her head and dashing with the others to help swiftly to help in any way possible while ensuring she wasn’t in the way.
“This hurts way more than it usually does…” Zithra grunted in a chuckle as he was laid down and helped with removing his upper clothes. His human body looked as though the frame was naturally lanky, however it was covered with burly musculature and higher than average density of body hair. His two bullet wounds didn’t appear to have struck anything vital, but also didn’t have exit points. Smacking Shida’s shoulder to get her attention, he rattled his satchel which thankfully remained in his transformation.
“I have a medical kit. Including bullet removal equipment. Forceps thing. Forget what it’s called.” he informed as he attempted to open it with a single shaking hand.
Already on it, Chak sat by and opened the back, swiftly digging through the mess of contents. She then pulled out a semi translucent rectangular plastic box and popped it open.
“Found it!” she chirped as she removed the tools and bandages, “I like your cute kitty cartoon bandaids by the way!” she said in hopes to keep the situation calm.
Zithra chuckled as his chest panted up and down, as he nodded.
“I can do it, unless either of you are medically trained? I’m not, but I’ve done this before.” he proposed, reaching his and out in offer.
“I’m afraid I’m not… “Chak admitted, “But I understand Terran physiology to a fair degree!”
“What’s a Terran?” the man asked, a bit confused.
Shida sighed and pushed down on Zithra’s shoulders to make him lean back.
“Okay, step one, stop the bleeding, step two, everything else,” she announced as she began to rifle through the supplies looking for anything that was going to help her in that endeavor. “And getting the bullets out is like number 6 on that priority list. These disguises are so effective that we might even have to worry about infection.”
Finding some rudimentary supplies both in Zithra’s satchel and the surrounding closets, she quickly began with crudely cleaning and dressing the wounds.
“Terrans are what the humans of this Galaxy will come to be known as in a couple of hundred years from now,” she explained while she pressed down on the man’s wounds, hearing him heavily inhale and grind his teeth against the pain. “Easiest distinction: Apes with a living planet equals humans, apes with a dead planet equals terrans.”
“Sure. Tack time travel on top of the growing list. Cool. Got it.” Zithra seethed through his teeth. His neck-long beard caught spittle as he fought every urge to not remain still, “Anything else I should know while we’re at it?”
“There are multiple universes converging together. Shida and I are actually from completely different original realities.” Chak informed.
“Okay…” the man accepted with a shake of his head.
“And we may have accidentally killed ‘Santa’…” the Cali added quickly.
“That… I gathered…” Zithra mumbled.
Chak then turned to Shida.
“Do you need me to leave to get anything or ask Dagon to go shop for more medical supplies?” she offered.
“I think we’re fine…” Shida mumbled while inspecting the wounds some more before starting to seal them up. “At least humans usually heal pretty well from something like this…and from what I gathered, most manarians should be similarly enhanced. Let’s just hope that carries over to the disguise as well.”
Standing up, she then turned to Chak for a moment.
“Though if Dagon is around, maybe ask him if he has some painkillers or something. Anything human-grade,” she said with a nod in the direction of the door.
“Got it.” Chak replied as she swiftly stamped out to find their human ally.
After a few minutes she returned with him in tow. Upon seeing the bloody but contained mess he took a moment to look away to mentally fortify.
“Right. I have generic aspirin and my prescribed migraine medicine…” he said, turning the small bottles of pills in his hands to read the backs, “I have nighttime cough syrup too but I doubt that will be of any use.” he added just to talk and keep his composure.
Shida grit her teeth.
“Don’t think any of that will help us,” she said, turning to Zithra. “Think you can tough this out? Or should we go get you something?”
“I toughed out a nasty bear trap for twelve hours once. I think I can manage if I have to.” Zithra grunted with a nod, “I just wish humans didn’t feel this dang sensitive to pain…” he added in a grumble before reaching for his satchel, “But I had some special occasion we- wee…. Uhh… canna-cann- what the heck?” the man stammered as his tongue tied itself, “Zone-out-happy-plant-chemical?” he tested, “Right, I wouldn’t say no to a lil bit of that. I was saving it for a special occasion, but this outta count.”
Shida nodded and pushed his satchel over to him, before standing up and helping him to his feet as well.
“Yeah, you do that,” she said, before turning around and looking at Dagon. In a sudden onslaught of raw emotion, her eyes narrowed furiously as she reached for her phone, while also pulling the man along by his collar. “In the meantime, we’re going to find out what the heck’s wrong with your crazy ex,” she grumbled.
“E-Ex?” Dagon stammered confused as he was dragged along, seemingly absolutely out of his depth in the situation he found himself in.
“Soon to be,” Shida corrected herself admittedly maybe a bit too harshly, however she also wasn’t exactly in the right condition to be pleasant right now.
After a few inputs into the device, she listened as the call was ringing. By now, the idiots would’ve had more than enough time to drag themselves to safety.
The phone on the other end rang and rang to the point it nearly went to voicemail. But the other end picked up to heavy rageful breathing. Despite it being Mary's phone it was clear that it wasn’t her to have picked up. The man’s breathing didn’t say anything, instead only listened in seething fury to get any clue of the caller’s location. In the background the sounds of many people talking in a commotion created a buzzing background white, but one stuck out among it all.
“Who is it?” Mary said in the distance.
There’s a following sharp and ‘silent’ shush from the holder of the phone.
“Bell, is it them?” Mary asked in a hushed but still audible voice only to be met with a harsher shush.
Though with this pushing him over the edge the man darkly sighed.
“Where did you take the kid?” he coldly demanded into the phone.
Dagon helped guide the bandaged man over to the nearby couch. Once sat, Zithra popped what looked like gelatin candies into his mouth and thanked Dagon with a thumbs up.
“To the hospital,” Shida replied, with the officer’s rage instantly paling in comparison to her own, as the room seemed to drop several degrees at just the sound of her voice that swept through it like an icy wind. “Where else would he be after you idiots shot him? And now, you better pick a god and pray that he’ll live through this, because there is not a force on heaven or Earth that will be able to save your soul should he not.”
The other end was without Bell’s voice for a while.
“What’s wrong?” Mary asked.
“You dare shift the blame after taking them as hostages!? No, you are responsible for this. The only reason you would bring the kid to hospital is because he would be too much of a liability! You’re not going to trick me… You’re the villains here…” Bell’s voice rationalized in a near-manic conspiratorial tone, “I’m the hero, you hear me? I’m going to stop you, no matter what it takes. You will not destroy Christmas! I’m supposed to stop you!”
“Bell… I think you need to sit down…” Mary’s voice said in surprising clarity, as if shocked at what she was witnessing.
Shida’s first instinct was to yell at the man, however she was overcome by an icy grip taking hold of her as she opened her mouth again.
“Well, here’s a promise,” she said in an exceedingly calm tone. “If you get close to me or any of my friends while toting a weapon one more time, I will personally make sure that you will not ever hurt any more innocent people. That I swear by the stars.”
There’s a screech and crackle as the other end’s phone was thrown into something with great force. Ending the call in dramatic fashion.
“Who was that?” Dagon cautiously asked, not hearing specific words but making out the masculine voice.
Chak carefully walked up next to Shida and gently placed a hand on her back. Massaging it smooth circular motions she hoped to help calm the tense air.
As Shida turned her gaze towards them, her eyes were just in the process of flashing back to their yellow-ish self.
“That was your fiance’s ‘Friend’,” she informed with cold words. “Don’t bother calling her. He broke her phone.”
Then, she shoved her own phone into the man’s hand.
“The Sheriff,” she harshly commanded, and after he only looked at her in desperate confusion for a moment, she clarified, “Get me the Sheriff on the line.”
Then she turned to Chak.
“Keep your gun on you at all times,” she said, putting her hands onto both of the Cali’s shoulders. “If that Officer guy gets anywhere close to you, don’t hesitate to shoot him. If he doesn’t think twice about shooting at children, he won’t even think once about shooting you. If I’m not around, you’ve got to be quicker than him, got it?”
“I understand.” Chak affirmed quickly, “We have to do what we must and I’ll prioritize that above all else.. I just… if he’s cursed by the Christmas magic like everyone seems to be to some degree, I can’t help but feel distraught for him along with anyone harmed by his actions. Not excusing him of course, he’s a clear danger. It’s just… terrible circumstances all around. Could you refresh my disguise?”
Dagon listened grimly, as he searched up the local police department and found the Sheriff's contact number. He handed the phone back with the number inputted, ready to call.
“I should go find Mary… get her away from that man.” he said as he stood up from the couch.
Shida nodded while rifling through her clothes for the sack of disguise powder.
“Be careful. That guy’s unstable,” Shida told Dagon as he made his way to the door. “And don’t get your hopes up.”
Then she complied with Chak’s request, quickly turning her back into the white-haired human form, before pressing the call button on the phone.
“I’ll try to get someone else to see reason,” she added while waiting for someone to pick up.
“Sheriff’s office.” a tired man’s voice answered rather quickly. From the sound of it, he seemed to be pulling away from another in person discussion.
“I need to speak to the Sheriff. Urgently,” Shida informed in brief terms. “And I think she’s going to want to talk to me as well. Tell her one of the ‘Aliens’ is on the line.”
“Right… sure. Please hold.” the voice replied with an audible eye roll before cutting out to generic Christmas jingles, not even ten seconds passed before the tired man returned stiffly, “Transferring you now.”
There were additional rings before the other end picked up again.
“This is Sheriff Rosieberg. I dearly hope this isn’t a prank call.” a woman’s voice answered sternly.
Shida exhaled.
“And I dearly hope you have a lot more brains than your officers,” she then replied without even pretending that this was going to be a nice or even pleasant talk. “At the very least I would assume the head of law enforcement in an area to be capable of reason.”
Her foot began tapping the ground from wound-up energy building within her.
“I am very reasonable, but there is a line crossed when kids are taken and held captive. I hope that’s clear. Is this your way of turning yourselves in, hun? Or is there something you feel like you need to say to me directly?” the woman’s cautious tone responded.
Shida sighed.
“Nobody took the kids. They lost their way after your officer lost them in the woods while chasing after us. While looking for shelter, they ran into someone else who took care of them during the storm. Someone who your officer then shot. I don’t know if he was also the one who shot one of the kids or if that was one of your other crazed vigilantes, but either way, I brought the boy to the hospital where he’s getting patched up right now. Your officer already knows about this, but I somehow doubt he’s called it in, or going to for that matter. You should inform his parents so they can go see him. He lost a lot of blood,” she explained in a calm, slow and precise manner. “And after you’re done with that, find officer Bell and for God’s sake take his gun away from him. The guy is very clearly out of his mind. And while I would love to say ‘sooner or later, somebody’s going to get hurt’, people already got hurt, so by now it’s more about not letting the situation get any worse.”
After her explanation, Shida paused for a long moment and then added,
“I’m afraid I can’t turn myself in, and not only because there’s not anything I’d have to turn in for. I promise you, my conscience is completely clear ever since I came here. But if you want to talk without an armed mob waiting for me and lighting the forest on fire, that much could be arranged, if it helps us end this absolute madness. I, too, draw my line at children.”
The clicking of a vehicle’s turn signal was the only immediate response from the other end, as it snapped and corrected as the turn was made the driver sighed slowly.
“I’m hoping to resolve all this before the parade, so tell you what… Officer Jingle Bell has been nothing but an outstanding officer of the law for his entire career. However, the two remaining kids have said basically what you are claiming. With a big green monster that protected them as Officer Bell initiated the conflict. He claimed it was about to tear them to shreds and he had no choice but to take action.” she paused in considerate thought, “I’ll send an officer to see if the third kid can further confirm your story, and have Bell come back into the station to be held to clarify his side of the story. We’ll see where things go from there. As for you, I don’t want this town or Christmas to go up in flames over aliens retaliating. We don’t even know how many of y’all are running around or understand why you’re here in the first place. So, here’s what I’m proposing as not a Sheriff, but as a humble earthling. You choose a place to meet, and I’ll personally come and hear your side of this mess. No other officers with me or hiding around, I’m sure you have eyes on all of us anyways with your super advanced technology. I’m willing to abide by that, but I will be armed for my own protection. Would that be fair?”
“Sure,” Shida said under her breath, before thinking it over for a second. “This morning you came to a diner a couple of minutes past noon and showed around posters of the missing children. You can meet me there in an hour. Don’t look for me, I will approach you. And don’t order the grilled cheese . it’s horrible there.”
The sheriff nervously laughs, surprised to be doing so.
“I think I know the one. You know, you don’t really talk like I’d imagine aliens to talk like, no offense of course.” she replied, “An hour? Alright. I’ll be sure to walk in without my uniform so we don’t get too many peep’n eyes.”
“Yeah. Same,” Shida said. “And just so you know, if Bell shows up, I’m putting a bullet in his skull.”

submitted by Demonicking101 to JarsCompany [link] [comments]

2024.01.18 14:54 fatcatgirl1111 New Episode on Pain Management from Andrew Huberman, see the Summary below: Dr. Sean Mackey - Tools to Reduce & Manage Pain

The following summary was created with the Recall Browser extension, you can save this summary to your own knowledge base or create your own here.

Dr. Sean Mackey (00:00:00)

Dr. Sean Mackey) is a medical doctor and a PhD who is the chief of the division of pain medicine and a professor of both anesthesiology and neurology at Stanford University School of Medicine.
Pain is a complex and subjective experience that serves to keep us away from injury or harm.
Pain is both a sensory and an emotional experience and is incredibly individual.
Chronic pain affects about 100 million Americans and costs about half a trillion dollars a year in medical expenses.

Pain, Unique Experiences, Chronic Pain (00:06:13)

Pain is a complex and subjective experience that serves a crucial role in keeping us away from injury or harm.
Pain is both a sensory and an emotional experience.
Pain is incredibly individual and can vary significantly from person to person.
Chronic pain is a persistent pain that lasts for more than 3 months and can have a significant impact on a person's life.
Chronic pain affects about 100 million Americans and costs about half a trillion dollars a year in medical expenses.

Pain & the Brain (00:13:05)

Pain is not simply a physical sensation, but also involves emotional and cognitive components.
There is no single "pain center" in the brain, but rather a distributed network of brain regions that contribute to the experience of pain.
Brain-based biomarkers can be used to identify common brain networks that represent the experience of pain.

Treating Pain, Medications: NSAIDs & Analgesics (00:16:15)

NSAIDs (nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs) like ibuprofen and naproxen are not technically analgesics (painkillers).
NSAIDs reduce inflammation and sensitization in the injured area and the spinal cord.
Opioids are analgesics that can potentially cause harm if taken in high doses.
The threshold for treating pain should be based on its impact on quality of life and daily activities.
Common over-the-counter NSAIDs include ibuprofen, naproxen, and acetaminophen (Tylenol).
Aspirin is not considered an NSAID but has anti-inflammatory and anti-hyperalgesic effects.
It's important to balance pain relief with the potential delay in healing caused by NSAIDs.
Individual variability exists in the effectiveness of NSAIDs, so rotating them can be beneficial.
NSAIDs should be taken with food and plenty of fluids to minimize side effects.
Talk to a doctor before taking NSAIDs if you have any underlying health conditions.

Inflammation, Pain & Recovery; Ibuprofen, Naprosyn & Aspirin (00:22:46)

Prostaglandins are one of the main ways the immune system responds to injury and creates inflammation.
Inflammation sensitizes the injured area, making it more sensitive.
NSAIDs can help with pain and function but may delay the healing process.
Balancing pain relief with healing is crucial, and the lowest effective dose of NSAIDs should be used.
NSAIDs should be taken with food and plenty of fluids to minimize side effects.
Individual variability exists in the effectiveness of NSAIDs, so rotating them can be beneficial.
Aspirin in low doses (81 mg) acts as an antiplatelet agent and may benefit heart health.
Higher doses of aspirin (325 mg) have anti-inflammatory effects similar to NSAIDs.

Caffeine, NSAIDs, Tylenol (00:30:19)

Caffeine can potentiate the analgesic response and be effective for headaches and migraines.
Caffeine can cause stomach irritation, so it's best to take NSAIDs with food.
Tylenol (acetaminophen) is safe on the stomach but should not exceed 4,000 milligrams per day.
COX-2 inhibitors like celecoxib are less irritating to the stomach but require a prescription.

Pain & Touch, Gate Control Theory (00:32:34)

Gate control theory of pain: rubbing, shaking, or running water on an injured area activates touch fibers that send signals to the spinal cord, inhibiting pain signals.
Kissing an injured area can reduce pain due to the activation of touch fibers and positive emotional salience.
Transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation (TENS) devices use electrical stimulation to activate touch fibers and reduce pain.
The mechanism of action for mechanical interventions like rubbing or shaking occurs in the spinal cord, not at the site of the injury.

Pain Threshold, Gender (00:38:56)

Pain threshold is the stimulus intensity that results in the onset of pain.
Men generally have higher pain thresholds to heat stimuli than women, but there is significant individual variability within both genders.
The difference in pain thresholds between men and women is often overstated due to the focus on group averages rather than individual variability.

Pain in Children, Pain Modulation (Pain Inhibits Pain) (00:44:53)

Pain perception is influenced by beliefs, expectations, anxiety, and early life experiences.
Pain inhibits pain, a phenomenon called conditioned pain modulation (CPM) or diffuse noxious inhibitory control (DNIC).
CPM involves activating a brainstem circuit that sends descending pathways to the spinal cord, inhibiting pain.
CPM may explain why some parents' reactions to their children's pain, such as smacking them, might inadvertently reduce the pain.
However, ignoring a child's pain or sending the wrong message can have negative consequences.

Tool: Heat, Cold & Pain; Changing Pain Threshold (00:53:20)

Cold reduces inflammation and slows nerve firing, reducing pain.
Heat increases blood flow, relaxes muscles, and feels good.
Individual variability exists in preferences for heat or cold.
Cold should be used with caution to avoid frostbite.
Numbing an area with cold can be effective in reducing pain.
Regular exposure to safe pain, such as deliberate cold exposure, can raise pain thresholds through habituation.
Cross-modality changes in pain thresholds are possible, but more research is needed.
Cognitive control, such as avoiding looking like a wuss in front of an attractive person, can temporarily raise pain thresholds.
Exercise can also increase pain thresholds over time by building inhibitory tone.

Tools: Psychology, Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction, Catastrophizing (01:00:54)

Mindfulness-based interventions lack specificity, granularity, and mechanistic logic.
Attentional distraction engages specific brain networks and can reduce pain, but it may not be effective at night when people are trying to sleep.
Non-judgmental acceptance of pain has been shown to be effective in reducing pain.
Cognitive reframing about the meaning of pain can be helpful in managing pain.
Catastrophizing pain can worsen the experience of pain.

Tool: Hurt vs. Harmed?, Chronic Pain (01:08:29)

The distinction between hurt and harm is critical in pain management.
Pain that is not causing harm does not need to be avoided.
Chronic pain conditions are often complex and require more than just education.
It is important to seek medical attention for pain that is getting worse or may be a sign of a serious medical condition.

Emotional Pain, Anger, Medication (01:12:38)

Dr. Mackey does not distinguish between psychological and physical pain, instead treating all pain as pain.
Pain is a sensory and emotional experience, so treating the whole person is important.
Anger, especially anger in (simmering, self-contained), is associated with worse pain.
Medications used for pain include antidepressants, anti-seizure medications, and anti-arrhythmia medications.
A holistic approach that addresses the whole person, including psychological, physical, and social factors, is most effective in treating pain.

Tool: Nutrition & Pain; Food Sensitization & Elimination Diets (01:20:43)

Nutrition plays a critical role in pain management.
Identifying and avoiding trigger foods can significantly reduce pain.
Elimination diets can help identify trigger foods.
Food sensitization can occur after a gut infection, leading to chronic pain.
Food sensitivity is a growing public health issue.
Research is needed to explore how foods impact local and systemic pain responses.

Visceral Pain; Back, Chest & Abdominal Pain (01:28:45)

Visceral pain is different from somatic pain.
Visceral pain is more diffuse and has larger receptive fields compared to somatic pain.
Visceral pain can cause referred pain to other areas of the body due to visceral-somatic convergence in the spinal cord.
Examples of referred pain from visceral organs include:
- Pelvic pain causing lower back pain.
- Heart attack causing pain radiating down the left arm.
- Abdominal surgery causing shoulder pain.

Referenced Pain, Neuropathic Pain; Stress, Memory & Psychological Pain (01:34:02)

Referred pain is pain that is felt in a different location from the source of the injury or damage.
Neuropathic pain is pain caused by damage to a peripheral nerve or the central nervous system.
Neuropathic pain can have different qualities and characteristics, such as shooting, stabbing, shock-like, or burning pain.
Stress can contribute to pain by impacting the end organ or tissue.
Chronic stress can lead to chronic pain.
Early life events and injuries can sensitize individuals to future pain vulnerability.
Pain can be associated with memory, and stress can trigger pain in areas previously injured or affected.

Romantic Love & Pain, Addiction (01:40:23)

A study explored the intersection of romantic love and pain perception.
The study found that being in love significantly reduced pain, with a correlation between the intensity of love and the level of pain relief.
The brain circuits involved in romantic love and addiction were found to be similar, suggesting that the early phase of a romantic relationship engages the same reward circuitry as addiction.
Attentional distraction was also found to be effective in reducing pain, but it worked on different brain circuits compared to love.
The strength of a romantic relationship a year later was found to be correlated with the love-induced analgesia and brain activity in the caudate nucleus and insula.

Endogenous & Exogenous Opioids, Morphine (01:48:57)

Endogenous opioids are natural painkillers produced by the body.
Higher endogenous opioid levels may lead to less emotional reactivity.
Morphine was the first exogenous opioid derived from the poppy, and medicinal chemists have since created variations of morphine and purely synthetic compounds like oxycodone.
The use of poppies for pain relief has a long history.
Opioids can positively transform people's lives by relieving suffering and improving quality of life, but they can also destroy lives due to addiction.
Opioids should be treated as a tool to be used in certain circumstances and not as a first-line agent.
The opioid crisis is a complex issue that requires a nuanced approach, considering both the benefits and risks of these drugs.

Opioid Crisis, Prescribing Physicians (01:53:17)

Opioid crisis is often attributed to overprescribing of opioids.
Opioids can be beneficial for pain management when used appropriately.
Overprescribing occurred due to lack of education among physicians about pain management and alternative treatments.
Some physicians overprescribed due to marketing messages and lack of alternatives.
A small group of physicians engaged in illegal activities related to opioid prescribing.
Fear of legal consequences led many physicians to abruptly stop prescribing opioids, leading patients to seek illicit sources.
Current opioid crisis is driven by illicit fentanyl.

Opioids & Fentanyl; Morphine, Oxycontin, Methadone (02:02:21)

Fentanyl in street drugs is the primary cause of opioid-related deaths, not fentanyl prescribed by physicians.
Compassionate opioid weaning can be successful for patients who want to reduce their opioid use.
Commonly used opioids include morphine, oxycodone, fentanyl, Tramadol, hydromorphone, and methadone.
Opioids work by binding to opioid receptors in the periphery, spinal cord, and brain.
Benzodiazepines are rarely used for pain relief, except in specific cases where anxiety contributes to pain.

Kratom, Cannabis, CBD & Pain; Drug Schedules (02:07:44)

Kratom has opioid-like properties and is available over the counter.
Some people find kratom helpful in reducing opioid use, but its safety and efficacy need further research.
Cannabis) has been shown to reduce neuropathic pain in small studies, but large-scale studies show mixed results.
Cannabis is not a uniform substance, and THC to CBD ratios and doses vary.
Cannabis remains a Schedule One drug, which hinders research.
Rescheduling cannabis) as a Schedule Two drug could facilitate research and regulation.

Pain Management Therapies, Acupuncture (02:18:12)

Acupuncture is one of six broad categories of therapies for chronic pain.
Acupuncture has been shown to activate peripheral adenosine receptors and engage different brain regions compared to sham acupuncture.
The exact mechanism of acupuncture's pain-relieving effects is still not fully understood.
Acupuncture can be effective for certain types of pain, but it's important to find a qualified acupuncturist.

Finding Reliable Physicians, Acupuncturist (02:22:19)

To find reliable physicians or acupuncturists, seek recommendations from trusted sources such as primary care doctors or colleagues.
Be cautious of inflated patient ratings, as they can be manipulated.
Consider using an independent platform that provides genuine patient experiences and ratings to find the best healthcare providers.

Chiropractic & Pain Treatment; Chronic Pain & Activity (02:26:36)

Chiropractic and acupuncture are different professions with distinct approaches to pain management.
Acupuncture has shown some effectiveness in certain patients and circumstances, and is now covered by Medicare for back pain in patients over 65.
Chiropractic care has mixed evidence for its effectiveness in treating low back pain.
High-velocity chiropractic manipulations may pose a risk of vertebral artery dissection, especially in the neck.
Chronic pain often leads to reduced activity and deconditioning.
Physical therapy and rehabilitation are crucial in addressing chronic pain by helping patients safely engage in activity and improving biomechanical issues.

Physical Therapy & Chronic Pain; Tool: Pacing (02:31:35)

Physical therapists play a vital role in chronic pain management by providing rehabilitation, goal setting, and education on body mechanics.
Pacing is a critical tool in managing chronic pain, involving setting small, incremental goals for physical activity.
Avoid overdoing activities on good days and recognize that bad days are normal.
Consistency in pacing helps prevent the negative reinforcement cycle of pain and inactivity.
Effective pain management involves collaboration between different healthcare providers, including primary care doctors, pain psychologists, and physical therapists.

Supplements: Acetyl-L-Carnitine, Alpha Lipoic Acid, Vitamin C, Creatine (02:36:35)

Acetyl-L-Carnitine:
- Improves mitochondrial health.
- Studied in the Sydney trials for diabetic neuropathy.
- Shown to improve nerve conduction velocity.
Alpha Lipoic Acid:
- Has antioxidant and calcium channel modulating properties.
- May benefit neuropathic pain.
- Can cause stomach upset.
Vitamin C:
- Prophylactic use may reduce the likelihood of nerve pain after surgery.
Fish Oil (Omega-3s):
- Beneficial for chronic pain.
- May reduce the viscosity of the blood, increasing the risk of bleeding.
Creatine:
- Shown some benefit in fibromyalgia and other conditions in small studies.

Pain Management, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Biofeedback (02:42:25)

Pain psychology and behavioral therapy can help with maladaptive coping and thought processes related to pain.
CBT involves recognizing unhelpful thoughts and patterns, interrupting them, and teaching goal setting, pacing, and relaxation techniques.
Biofeedback provides closed-loop feedback to help individuals learn to calm down the sympathetic nervous system.
Mindfulness-based stress reduction and acceptance and commitment therapy are other tools used by pain psychologists.
Empowered relief is a brief intervention developed by Dr. Mackey's partner, Beth, that condenses 8 weeks of CBT into 2 hours.
Digital platforms and online treatments are being developed to make pain management tools more accessible.

National Pain Strategy, National Pain Care Act (02:48:32)

Dr. Mackey) co-led the development of the National Pain Strategy, a strategic plan for transforming pain assessment, care, education, and communication.
Full implementation of the National Pain Strategy would make a significant difference in the lives of people living with pain.
Concerned citizens can help advance the implementation of the National Pain Strategy by contacting their representatives and writing letters.
Dr. Mackey's nonprofit organization, Pain USA, aims to advance the implementation of the National Pain Strategy and use high-quality data to inform pain care and treatments.

submitted by fatcatgirl1111 to ChronicPain [link] [comments]

2024.01.18 14:52 fatcatgirl1111 New Episode on Pain Management, see the Summary below: Dr. Sean Mackey - Tools to Reduce & Manage Pain

The following summary was created with the Recall Browser extension, you can save this summary to your own knowledge base or create your own here.

Dr. Sean Mackey (00:00:00)

Dr. Sean Mackey) is a medical doctor and a PhD who is the chief of the division of pain medicine and a professor of both anesthesiology and neurology at Stanford University School of Medicine.
Pain is a complex and subjective experience that serves to keep us away from injury or harm.
Pain is both a sensory and an emotional experience and is incredibly individual.
Chronic pain affects about 100 million Americans and costs about half a trillion dollars a year in medical expenses.

Pain, Unique Experiences, Chronic Pain (00:06:13)

Pain is a complex and subjective experience that serves a crucial role in keeping us away from injury or harm.
Pain is both a sensory and an emotional experience.
Pain is incredibly individual and can vary significantly from person to person.
Chronic pain is a persistent pain that lasts for more than 3 months and can have a significant impact on a person's life.
Chronic pain affects about 100 million Americans and costs about half a trillion dollars a year in medical expenses.

Pain & the Brain (00:13:05)

Pain is not simply a physical sensation, but also involves emotional and cognitive components.
There is no single "pain center" in the brain, but rather a distributed network of brain regions that contribute to the experience of pain.
Brain-based biomarkers can be used to identify common brain networks that represent the experience of pain.

Treating Pain, Medications: NSAIDs & Analgesics (00:16:15)

NSAIDs (nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs) like ibuprofen and naproxen are not technically analgesics (painkillers).
NSAIDs reduce inflammation and sensitization in the injured area and the spinal cord.
Opioids are analgesics that can potentially cause harm if taken in high doses.
The threshold for treating pain should be based on its impact on quality of life and daily activities.
Common over-the-counter NSAIDs include ibuprofen, naproxen, and acetaminophen (Tylenol).
Aspirin is not considered an NSAID but has anti-inflammatory and anti-hyperalgesic effects.
It's important to balance pain relief with the potential delay in healing caused by NSAIDs.
Individual variability exists in the effectiveness of NSAIDs, so rotating them can be beneficial.
NSAIDs should be taken with food and plenty of fluids to minimize side effects.
Talk to a doctor before taking NSAIDs if you have any underlying health conditions.

Inflammation, Pain & Recovery; Ibuprofen, Naprosyn & Aspirin (00:22:46)

Prostaglandins are one of the main ways the immune system responds to injury and creates inflammation.
Inflammation sensitizes the injured area, making it more sensitive.
NSAIDs can help with pain and function but may delay the healing process.
Balancing pain relief with healing is crucial, and the lowest effective dose of NSAIDs should be used.
NSAIDs should be taken with food and plenty of fluids to minimize side effects.
Individual variability exists in the effectiveness of NSAIDs, so rotating them can be beneficial.
Aspirin in low doses (81 mg) acts as an antiplatelet agent and may benefit heart health.
Higher doses of aspirin (325 mg) have anti-inflammatory effects similar to NSAIDs.

Caffeine, NSAIDs, Tylenol (00:30:19)

Caffeine can potentiate the analgesic response and be effective for headaches and migraines.
Caffeine can cause stomach irritation, so it's best to take NSAIDs with food.
Tylenol (acetaminophen) is safe on the stomach but should not exceed 4,000 milligrams per day.
COX-2 inhibitors like celecoxib are less irritating to the stomach but require a prescription.

Pain & Touch, Gate Control Theory (00:32:34)

Gate control theory of pain: rubbing, shaking, or running water on an injured area activates touch fibers that send signals to the spinal cord, inhibiting pain signals.
Kissing an injured area can reduce pain due to the activation of touch fibers and positive emotional salience.
Transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation (TENS) devices use electrical stimulation to activate touch fibers and reduce pain.
The mechanism of action for mechanical interventions like rubbing or shaking occurs in the spinal cord, not at the site of the injury.

Pain Threshold, Gender (00:38:56)

Pain threshold is the stimulus intensity that results in the onset of pain.
Men generally have higher pain thresholds to heat stimuli than women, but there is significant individual variability within both genders.
The difference in pain thresholds between men and women is often overstated due to the focus on group averages rather than individual variability.

Pain in Children, Pain Modulation (Pain Inhibits Pain) (00:44:53)

Pain perception is influenced by beliefs, expectations, anxiety, and early life experiences.
Pain inhibits pain, a phenomenon called conditioned pain modulation (CPM) or diffuse noxious inhibitory control (DNIC).
CPM involves activating a brainstem circuit that sends descending pathways to the spinal cord, inhibiting pain.
CPM may explain why some parents' reactions to their children's pain, such as smacking them, might inadvertently reduce the pain.
However, ignoring a child's pain or sending the wrong message can have negative consequences.

Tool: Heat, Cold & Pain; Changing Pain Threshold (00:53:20)

Cold reduces inflammation and slows nerve firing, reducing pain.
Heat increases blood flow, relaxes muscles, and feels good.
Individual variability exists in preferences for heat or cold.
Cold should be used with caution to avoid frostbite.
Numbing an area with cold can be effective in reducing pain.
Regular exposure to safe pain, such as deliberate cold exposure, can raise pain thresholds through habituation.
Cross-modality changes in pain thresholds are possible, but more research is needed.
Cognitive control, such as avoiding looking like a wuss in front of an attractive person, can temporarily raise pain thresholds.
Exercise can also increase pain thresholds over time by building inhibitory tone.

Tools: Psychology, Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction, Catastrophizing (01:00:54)

Mindfulness-based interventions lack specificity, granularity, and mechanistic logic.
Attentional distraction engages specific brain networks and can reduce pain, but it may not be effective at night when people are trying to sleep.
Non-judgmental acceptance of pain has been shown to be effective in reducing pain.
Cognitive reframing about the meaning of pain can be helpful in managing pain.
Catastrophizing pain can worsen the experience of pain.

Tool: Hurt vs. Harmed?, Chronic Pain (01:08:29)

The distinction between hurt and harm is critical in pain management.
Pain that is not causing harm does not need to be avoided.
Chronic pain conditions are often complex and require more than just education.
It is important to seek medical attention for pain that is getting worse or may be a sign of a serious medical condition.

Emotional Pain, Anger, Medication (01:12:38)

Dr. Mackey does not distinguish between psychological and physical pain, instead treating all pain as pain.
Pain is a sensory and emotional experience, so treating the whole person is important.
Anger, especially anger in (simmering, self-contained), is associated with worse pain.
Medications used for pain include antidepressants, anti-seizure medications, and anti-arrhythmia medications.
A holistic approach that addresses the whole person, including psychological, physical, and social factors, is most effective in treating pain.

Tool: Nutrition & Pain; Food Sensitization & Elimination Diets (01:20:43)

Nutrition plays a critical role in pain management.
Identifying and avoiding trigger foods can significantly reduce pain.
Elimination diets can help identify trigger foods.
Food sensitization can occur after a gut infection, leading to chronic pain.
Food sensitivity is a growing public health issue.
Research is needed to explore how foods impact local and systemic pain responses.

Visceral Pain; Back, Chest & Abdominal Pain (01:28:45)

Visceral pain is different from somatic pain.
Visceral pain is more diffuse and has larger receptive fields compared to somatic pain.
Visceral pain can cause referred pain to other areas of the body due to visceral-somatic convergence in the spinal cord.
Examples of referred pain from visceral organs include:
- Pelvic pain causing lower back pain.
- Heart attack causing pain radiating down the left arm.
- Abdominal surgery causing shoulder pain.

Referenced Pain, Neuropathic Pain; Stress, Memory & Psychological Pain (01:34:02)

Referred pain is pain that is felt in a different location from the source of the injury or damage.
Neuropathic pain is pain caused by damage to a peripheral nerve or the central nervous system.
Neuropathic pain can have different qualities and characteristics, such as shooting, stabbing, shock-like, or burning pain.
Stress can contribute to pain by impacting the end organ or tissue.
Chronic stress can lead to chronic pain.
Early life events and injuries can sensitize individuals to future pain vulnerability.
Pain can be associated with memory, and stress can trigger pain in areas previously injured or affected.

Romantic Love & Pain, Addiction (01:40:23)

A study explored the intersection of romantic love and pain perception.
The study found that being in love significantly reduced pain, with a correlation between the intensity of love and the level of pain relief.
The brain circuits involved in romantic love and addiction were found to be similar, suggesting that the early phase of a romantic relationship engages the same reward circuitry as addiction.
Attentional distraction was also found to be effective in reducing pain, but it worked on different brain circuits compared to love.
The strength of a romantic relationship a year later was found to be correlated with the love-induced analgesia and brain activity in the caudate nucleus and insula.

Endogenous & Exogenous Opioids, Morphine (01:48:57)

Endogenous opioids are natural painkillers produced by the body.
Higher endogenous opioid levels may lead to less emotional reactivity.
Morphine was the first exogenous opioid derived from the poppy, and medicinal chemists have since created variations of morphine and purely synthetic compounds like oxycodone.
The use of poppies for pain relief has a long history.
Opioids can positively transform people's lives by relieving suffering and improving quality of life, but they can also destroy lives due to addiction.
Opioids should be treated as a tool to be used in certain circumstances and not as a first-line agent.
The opioid crisis is a complex issue that requires a nuanced approach, considering both the benefits and risks of these drugs.

Opioid Crisis, Prescribing Physicians (01:53:17)

Opioid crisis is often attributed to overprescribing of opioids.
Opioids can be beneficial for pain management when used appropriately.
Overprescribing occurred due to lack of education among physicians about pain management and alternative treatments.
Some physicians overprescribed due to marketing messages and lack of alternatives.
A small group of physicians engaged in illegal activities related to opioid prescribing.
Fear of legal consequences led many physicians to abruptly stop prescribing opioids, leading patients to seek illicit sources.
Current opioid crisis is driven by illicit fentanyl.

Opioids & Fentanyl; Morphine, Oxycontin, Methadone (02:02:21)

Fentanyl in street drugs is the primary cause of opioid-related deaths, not fentanyl prescribed by physicians.
Compassionate opioid weaning can be successful for patients who want to reduce their opioid use.
Commonly used opioids include morphine, oxycodone, fentanyl, Tramadol, hydromorphone, and methadone.
Opioids work by binding to opioid receptors in the periphery, spinal cord, and brain.
Benzodiazepines are rarely used for pain relief, except in specific cases where anxiety contributes to pain.

Kratom, Cannabis, CBD & Pain; Drug Schedules (02:07:44)

Kratom has opioid-like properties and is available over the counter.
Some people find kratom helpful in reducing opioid use, but its safety and efficacy need further research.
Cannabis) has been shown to reduce neuropathic pain in small studies, but large-scale studies show mixed results.
Cannabis is not a uniform substance, and THC to CBD ratios and doses vary.
Cannabis remains a Schedule One drug, which hinders research.
Rescheduling cannabis) as a Schedule Two drug could facilitate research and regulation.

Pain Management Therapies, Acupuncture (02:18:12)

Acupuncture is one of six broad categories of therapies for chronic pain.
Acupuncture has been shown to activate peripheral adenosine receptors and engage different brain regions compared to sham acupuncture.
The exact mechanism of acupuncture's pain-relieving effects is still not fully understood.
Acupuncture can be effective for certain types of pain, but it's important to find a qualified acupuncturist.

Finding Reliable Physicians, Acupuncturist (02:22:19)

To find reliable physicians or acupuncturists, seek recommendations from trusted sources such as primary care doctors or colleagues.
Be cautious of inflated patient ratings, as they can be manipulated.
Consider using an independent platform that provides genuine patient experiences and ratings to find the best healthcare providers.

Chiropractic & Pain Treatment; Chronic Pain & Activity (02:26:36)

Chiropractic and acupuncture are different professions with distinct approaches to pain management.
Acupuncture has shown some effectiveness in certain patients and circumstances, and is now covered by Medicare for back pain in patients over 65.
Chiropractic care has mixed evidence for its effectiveness in treating low back pain.
High-velocity chiropractic manipulations may pose a risk of vertebral artery dissection, especially in the neck.
Chronic pain often leads to reduced activity and deconditioning.
Physical therapy and rehabilitation are crucial in addressing chronic pain by helping patients safely engage in activity and improving biomechanical issues.

Physical Therapy & Chronic Pain; Tool: Pacing (02:31:35)

Physical therapists play a vital role in chronic pain management by providing rehabilitation, goal setting, and education on body mechanics.
Pacing is a critical tool in managing chronic pain, involving setting small, incremental goals for physical activity.
Avoid overdoing activities on good days and recognize that bad days are normal.
Consistency in pacing helps prevent the negative reinforcement cycle of pain and inactivity.
Effective pain management involves collaboration between different healthcare providers, including primary care doctors, pain psychologists, and physical therapists.

Supplements: Acetyl-L-Carnitine, Alpha Lipoic Acid, Vitamin C, Creatine (02:36:35)

Acetyl-L-Carnitine:
- Improves mitochondrial health.
- Studied in the Sydney trials for diabetic neuropathy.
- Shown to improve nerve conduction velocity.
Alpha Lipoic Acid:
- Has antioxidant and calcium channel modulating properties.
- May benefit neuropathic pain.
- Can cause stomach upset.
Vitamin C:
- Prophylactic use may reduce the likelihood of nerve pain after surgery.
Fish Oil (Omega-3s):
- Beneficial for chronic pain.
- May reduce the viscosity of the blood, increasing the risk of bleeding.
Creatine:
- Shown some benefit in fibromyalgia and other conditions in small studies.

Pain Management, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Biofeedback (02:42:25)

Pain psychology and behavioral therapy can help with maladaptive coping and thought processes related to pain.
CBT involves recognizing unhelpful thoughts and patterns, interrupting them, and teaching goal setting, pacing, and relaxation techniques.
Biofeedback provides closed-loop feedback to help individuals learn to calm down the sympathetic nervous system.
Mindfulness-based stress reduction and acceptance and commitment therapy are other tools used by pain psychologists.
Empowered relief is a brief intervention developed by Dr. Mackey's partner, Beth, that condenses 8 weeks of CBT into 2 hours.
Digital platforms and online treatments are being developed to make pain management tools more accessible.

National Pain Strategy, National Pain Care Act (02:48:32)

Dr. Mackey) co-led the development of the National Pain Strategy, a strategic plan for transforming pain assessment, care, education, and communication.
Full implementation of the National Pain Strategy would make a significant difference in the lives of people living with pain.
Concerned citizens can help advance the implementation of the National Pain Strategy by contacting their representatives and writing letters.
Dr. Mackey's nonprofit organization, Pain USA, aims to advance the implementation of the National Pain Strategy and use high-quality data to inform pain care and treatments.

submitted by fatcatgirl1111 to HubermanLab [link] [comments]

2024.01.18 13:50 pindalolas Marauders Ideas for Improvements and content.

I feel the game has changed quite a bit (for the better) with the latest Guild content. It's nice to have a guild hall where I can do some off raid activities because it brings a new fun to the game.
However, since this is one of the few communities where I feel the devs are really close to us and listen to the playerbase, I gathered up some ideas both from other games I played and ones I think might fit inside the Marauders universe.
There will be mention of other games, so bear with me, I'm not comparing or ranking features in games, those are just ideas that I think would bring more fun to the game.

1. Off-Raid quests and activities
Like in Tarkov we have quests that require you to setup weapons that match the questgiver specifications. Since we have more attachments (and I'm assuming more are to come on the next updates), we might get a new tab on the contracts section, divided by factions, that require you to deliver, for example, "3 Uzis with stock and suppressors", or "Deliver 5 Bottle of Aspirins and 3 Morphines". The rewards would be based on barter: some money, xp rewards, and componets for crafting/ammo. I think this would balance the rewards as to not give something overpowered, but still a nice XP boost and faction standing.

2. Smuggling missions
Let's say you get a contract from the Pirates Faction, and their contact specifies you must bring "5 units of Spice" to stash it on a safe container inside the Mining Compound. This would create additional tasks inside maps, which would in turn generate more player interaction on maps. "But how could you know in which map you are going to spawn?"

3. Choosing Maps
Instead of relying on matchmaking to put you up in a map, players could choose in what map will they spawn. The random mode would still be active, functioning the way it's already coded. This is a change that I do not know if it's planned, but I also believe this would create more players per raid as the matchmaking for the player would be focused on populating one specific map. If there are not enough players, you could spawn in just the same (you just wouldn't know you're alone), which would also decrease the time of waiting for games for some timezones.

4. Passive production and crafting
Let's say that instead of creating a guild to have a guildhall, you could also use the components to build workstations, creating new layouts for the crafting system, which would be divided by stations: if I want to craft meds, I would go to the 'Medstation' tab and choose whatever I want to craft. This by itself would not be a drastic change, just some redesign. What could change is the "Passive Income" part, in which players could build a 'Black Market' station to craft Spice and some other questionable goods that could be implemented (yes, I'm talking about SPACE DRUGS). You could craft Methyl, Spice, and some other goods by scrounging up medical items and components, to use them to boost your guy (while also damaging some portion of health, because drugs are bad), or complete smuggling missions and other contracts.

5. Ship system overhaul
I'm not much into space combat, I'll admit. It's a good mechanic, I'm just not good at it. But I always felt that ships, even the expensive ones, are extremely disposable. If we could mod them, just the tiniest bit, like upgrading engines, attaching new weapons and new types of ammo (that deliver more haul damage, or deflects incoming shots), or just stealing random ships to scrap them and sell their parts. Also, ship cosmetics could also be implemented, like adding a guild symbol to their painting, or even being able to change their colours based on what you have purchased (game money, of course) or unlocked via contracts. This could also mean that when you blow up a ship (and manage to kill the breacher) you could approach the blown ship and salvage some of the broken parts, very much like what Eve does to wreckage).

6. QoL updates
Some things that annoy me are related to Quality of Life content. Like for example, whenever I have a crate open on my stash and I press esc because in my mind this would close the crate, it brings me back to the main menu and I have to open the stash again. Also, double clicking could open the crates and bags instead of right click > open. Also an auto-sort button would be welcome, so it organizes the stash going from ammo, meds, armor, weapons, junk, crates. If there is a way, sorting by filters could also work, like if I want to sort from the most valuable items to the less valuable.

7. Player Market
That's a tricky one. I'm all up for a player market, where I could either auction or sell at a specified price whatever items I deem worth of selling. This could be comps, attachments, armors, weapons, consumables etc. What's tricky about this is exactly what happens in Tarkov - I never ran into blatant cheaters on Marauders, but I won't say there are none. If cheaters take advantage to gather more hard to come by loots, they could, potentially, set the market to chaos and inflation by gathering all the juicy loot just to sell at a higher price for those who want /need them.

Sidenotes:
A. Raider Mode
I'm happy with how raider mode is right now and I don't have any suggestions on how to improve it further. I think the map cycle is decent and the risks are as high as your rewards (can't lose what you never had).
B. Character Customization
I like this idea, I'm just not sure how it would work. I like that my guy doesn't have a face, but if there would be customization options I would not oppose to that. Maybe some hyperglass visors so people can see what a handsome devil I am before they maul me down because I suck at PVP?

submitted by pindalolas to MaraudersGame [link] [comments]

2024.01.15 22:43 HughEhhoule Steamboat Willie and the Karnival Kids

Link to Part 1
https://www.reddit.com/nosleep/s/CHXtvcEGok
I thought long and hard about if I should write anything else. Don’t get me wrong, whatever comes my way, let it come. I have no family, no friends, and if I was any closer to death’s door, I’d be sleeping on his couch.
But, it’s you kids I’ve been thinking about. I don’t know what exactly I expected when I put up what happened, maybe put a little of the fear of God into you lot, keep you away from the things that go bump in the night.
But instead, I’ve got strangers from across the world asking how they can help.
So, I want to make this more than just the ramblings of an old man. Give you some information you can use, if, heaven forbid, you find yourself on the receiving end of something that doesn’t follow God’s law.
Before I tell you about the second time I got involved with “ Mr. D”, let’s go over things that are happening today a little.
Every copy of something made like this has potential to turn rotten. Some more than others, usually older copies, or ones with some kind of historical significance.
(as for other kinds of messed up videotapes, I don’t know. I’ve had a handful of jobs that brush up against this stuff, I’m no Ghostbuster.)
They like to be around each other, if you started off collecting and got one, you’ll find yourself drawn to certain other pieces of animation or film, seemingly at random.
If you want to try and get mixed up in this, first I’d ask yourself why.
Do you want a cheap scare? Well, just watch, eventually you’ll get a few frames of something off. Probably happened already, but just slipped right by. Doing this isn’t very dangerous, unless you make it a habit. Quantity can, over time, make up for quality.
You want to see what’s really there, hiding in shadows and magnetic ribbon? Well, that’s a little harder. This is going to change your perspective on life, a lot of folks, it turns them cold. Doing this is stupid, but on the other hand it’s the only way to test the waters to see if you could look one of these things in the face. You want to do something about this century old curse? This is the first step.
Memorize the piece of media, I’m not talking grade school math test, you need to be able to quote it, to describe it nearly perfectly.
Copy it, then copy the copy. The more times you do this, the worse the quality, the easier it is for whatever is on the other side to knock on the window. The key is not to go so far as you can’t see what your looking for when it happens.
From there it’s just a matter of watch, rinse, repeat. What exactly happens? Can it hurt you? You’ll find out. If you go into this, you need to understand there are some things you won’t, or can’t know. That’s the danger, sometimes you're just an egg, and the shit your looking for is a brick wall.
1927, and I’ll spare you the lead up this time. It was much of the same, and ended up with Myself, Sylvia, Ezekiel, Leroy, and a new man, a tall guy with thick, slicked back blond hair and a suit that cost more than my car, standing around the back of a slightly newer model of paddy wagon.
Sylvia’s arm was replaced with a dull grey steel prosthetic. Zeke, was missing the ‘Gee Whiz’ look he had on our last trip, and the contraption Leroy was wearing was sleeker, and less bulky.
We’re ready to go, Thompson stands like a school marm.
“Good to see all of you.
You’ve probably guessed by now that you’re going back to Project Mountain.
The area has been significantly, tamed, and being used to test run a few ideas Mr. D plans on unveiling to the world in the next few decades.
That being said, radio or telegraph signals are next to impossible to get in or out. Something about the magnetic field, I don’t know.
You five are to make contact with our people at the coordinates on your maps, and relay any information they have for us.
This should be simple, quick, and painless. We just wanted a few folks who knew their way around. “ The agent informs us.
“Who’s the suit? “ Leroy says, “Doesn’t look like much of a jungle explorer. “
Thompson glowers at Leroy from behind darkened glasses.
The man in the suit simply smiles.
“Very correct observation. “, The newcomer starts, “ My name is Arthur Deus. And I am Mr. D’s benefactor.
He has the vision and the money, I have the means to make things happen. One of those things is the place we will be visiting.
I want to gather some data, shake a few hands, and, well, if I’m being honest, micromanage, just a little bit. “
“Ah, so really, this is an escort mission. We are the ‘oh shit ‘ button, aren’t we Thompson. “ I say, I don’t get a response, but I know I’m right.
This time the terrible ride ends with us being lead to a nice, military style pickup.
I drive, and what I see, well.
I can’t say the place was inviting by any means, but we were driving on a road at least. The twitching, bouncing trees, were still thick on the sides of the pavement , and I could catch the odd glimpse of massive eyed, not quite natural things within the forest from time to time.
There is a sense of dread in the truck, all of us back somewhere we never wanted to go again.
Now this is the point where I’m sure you are asking yourself, “Yes Ethan, you dumb bastard, you didn’t want to go back, so why did you? “, and I don’t blame you. Hindsight being 20/20 and all, I should have ran as far away from Thompson as fast as I could.
But, (and I’m sure you are as sick of hearing this as I was at your age) things, they were different back then. I want to be clear, I don’t mean better. I lost too many friends for too many mundane, stupid preventable reasons to say that. But, yeah, different.
Going through trauma, well that didn’t mean anything other than you got out the other end. You didn’t talk about it, you jammed shit down and you got through your day. And working, well, shit job equals better money, way of the world for everyone but the Hursts and Rockafellers.
In the distance we see what is unmistakably an amusement park. The gates were styled like a medieval castle, with false perspective mountains on either side.
I’m the first to laugh.
“Willie world? “ I snicker, the strung nerves in the truck let go and we all begin to laugh.
A cloud passes over Art’s face, but in a moment he’s smiling, taking the jab in good fun.
“A, working title if you will. “ He says.
“I’d hope so, unless it’s a tallywacker museum. “ Leroy replies.
“ That I’d pay to see. “ Sylvia says.
I’m going to save you some time again , the place we enter is much like the place you’re expecting. About a quarter of the size, maybe a little less. It has most of what you’d expect, though a lot of things are mock up’s, or stand ins for future expansions.
Folks are working and using the amenities , the first thing I notice is they’re all adults.
“Staffed entirely by people like yourself who were willing to take a little risk. Used by the same, all employees, free to leave of their own free will.
You seem like the sort that’d ask. “ Art says, I don’t outright hate him, but I can’t say I approve of his attitude.
The second thing I notice makes me ready the rifle I demanded for this trip down memory lane.
I can tell, at a glance, they are at least related to the things we saw on the boats. But each seems to be configured in a unique way, no 2 quite sharing the same features.
They’re stuffed into oversized suits, some partially, some fully encased in plush heads, feet and friendly looking costumes.
Each is attended by two people.
One carries a thick-handled two-pronged spear like device, wires and bolts attached to it. The other seems to be taking notes.
I become enthralled with a tall, canine looking thing, it’s exposed legs are yellow skinned with thin, black fur. A worn vest is stapled to it, and it wears, a massive, goofy looking cartoon dog head. It waves and dances at the passers by, but suddenly, as if hit by a fit or seizure, it’s posture changes, it hunches and starts to run at a couple enjoying a set of Italian ices.
But before it can get far, it’s handler jabs it with the device , I don’t see blood, or any sign of damage, but the thing hits the ground face first, and the handler drags it away by the feet. A slight woman with a military style haircut following them writing furiously.
“Still working out a few issues, as you can see, but in time, we will manage to find out how to make best use of the… locals. “ Art adds to the horrifying scene.
I can’t say I wasn’t afraid. The seven foot creatures being… trained? Around me, set me on edge worse than any Hun sniper ever could.
That being said, what was going on seemed, strange, dangerous, for sure. But, I wasn’t seeing the kind of evil, torture laden shitstorm I was expecting. It was more Coal mine than war crime.
“You four, spend the next twenty four hours as you wish. There is plenty to see and do, let me know how everything is, where we can improve, be honest, I’m looking for data, not to have my ass kissed. “ Art says, Walking down a street lined with cheap faux cobblestones, and store fronts both real and decorative.
“How does everyone feel about Arthur? “ Zeke says, as we take in the sights.
“Fop” Sylvia says.
“Creepy” Leroy adds.
“Putz. “ I chime in.
Zeke looks like he wants to say something but then only adds, “ You guys are probably right. I think this place is giving me the heebie-jeebies. “
I don’t judge Zeke for the statement, the more we see of this place, the more the combination of family friendly and demonic entity becomes apparent.
The people are all pale and sickly, as if this place takes some kind of toll on the human body. The creatures, for all their leather skinned, lesion infested horror, seem beaten and tortured.
I hate to have literal sympathy for the devil here, but Art, or his men have found ways to control and herd them. I see violence, a person testing the park having a rouge, duck-themed, half dressed thing bit a plate sized chunk out of them, as an example. But these are put down with vigor and brutality.
I don’t feel safe, none of us do, but I’m just as worried about Art’s cronies as the dancing, screaming things they have a tenuous hold on.
We find a bar pretty quickly, and from there, well, we do what soldiers do when presented with downtime and hooch. And while my companions won’t ever get their names on a monument, to me they are every bit as much of a soldier as the men standing beside me in Germany were.
We attract a bit of attention, I’m expecting some kind of strange, hive mind mob, or maybe just good old fashioned mistrust of strangers, but the folks, for all their off-putting looks and random minor wounds, seemed happy to have some new people around.
We talked and drank, and I found myself sharing a strange sense of comradery with the workers. Each had a story or two about a run in with the things that live in this place. Each had survived, stayed and made a good living doing it.
Zeke was the first to stumble off to a half finished hotel room, his eyes clouded with spirits. Next was Leroy, though the man wasn’t pounding them back as hard as the rest of us. The last of my companions to call it a night was Sylvia, still looking stone sober despite matching me drink for drink.
I was left with a handful of employees, well past sloshed, but for the first time in a long while connecting with folks.
“You still feel it? “ asks Anthony, a short, dark haired man.
I know what he means, but I wave a hand at him dismissively.
“You do don’t you? That dime sized tingle deep in the back of your mind. “ Anthony grins as he fills two water glasses halfway with whiskey.
“A little, I guess. Don’t really like to think about what it means. “ I reply, after a long pause and a long drink.
Anthony looks around a little nervously, and motions for me to leave the bar.
I know I’m not breaking any new ground here, but hooch doesn’t make for the best decisions. I join Anthony as he walks down a long, dark street. Shadows from half finished buildings and flickering lightbulbs making me antsy.
“Just have to be careful of who’s listening Ethan.
See, some of us, want to know what that feeling is. And We’ve figured out a way how. “ Anthony says.
I feel the other shoe dropping, these guys must be some kind of resistance, this place can’t be what it seems.
“I knew it. No one that goes around doing things like this… is on the up and up. “ I reply, following Anthony down a dark alley.
“You’re right there chum, Arthur, he wants to enslave the Residents, he tortures them, mutilates them. He wants slaves for his friend’s little cartoon empire. “ Anthony opens a thick metal door at the end of the alley.
He closes it as we walk in, and it takes me a moment to adjust to the dim light. Once I do though what I see makes every instinct I have scream at me to run.
The ratlike thing from before sits in the center of the room, on a throne seemingly made from the same material as it’s barge.
It looks tired, groggy, and almost, hazy, like it’s not quite there.
To it’s left and right, sitting atop mounds of offal and gore were 3 others. 3 lesser terrors flanking their king.
My mind starts to put two and two together, and I think to the creatures performing in the streets. Each of the abominations in front of me seemed to be a mold or archetype. The lanky, rotten hound, the lurching, screaming duck, and another rat, it’s torn, faded skirt making me think it’s supposed to be female.
The people milling about this meeting hall butcher shop hybrid were crazed and mutilated. Engaged in acts with the entities that were either lewd, torturous, or both. My stomach churns. The humans come away from their sinful trysts bleeding and bruised.
Then, I feel it, that small tingle at the back of my mind turns to a faint whisper. I listen for a second, and nothing on earth could get me to repeat what I heard.
“Arthur wants to bring the Residents back as slaves, drag these Gods to the mortal realm in shackles. But you can hear them too, can’t you Ethan?
Look upon the miracle! “ Anthony preaches, “ somewhere in his labs, Arthur has scientists trying to desecrate our God, yet still, here he sits. He is here, no absentee father from an Abrahamic fable. He, nor his disciples held fast to mortal laws like time and space.
Ethan, brother, you can help us. You can be one of the Residents chosen. “
I’m so disgusted I want to plug the lot of these demon bothering idiots. But stone cold sober, even without the living embodiment of sin right in front of me, two dozen people, close quarters, with a long gun and pistol. Well, I’m a soldier, not some kind of pulp novel hero.
Discretion is the better part of valor.
“Tony, buddy, I’ve never been the kind of guy to question another man’s faith. But can’t go biting the hand that feeds me.
Best of luck for you, and your friends. And, for that matter, tell the big fella there, thanks for not killing me. But, I need to be getting on my way. “ My tone is firm, but not confrontational.
I begin to back away, and I don’t like the look in Anthony’s eyes. What I like even less is, the misshapen rodent like thing turning towards me.
It feels like a fish hook in my brain, a feeling strong enough to be an urge, that tells me to go to it. To look upon the only true evidence of the divine I’ve ever seen.
I resist it, I keep walking backwards, if looks could kill, I’d be dead ten times over, but no one in the little slice of hell comes at me.
I beat feet back to the hotel, and have no luck in waking any of my companions, even less sleeping. I drink coffee and stare at the door to my room rifle in hand, till Leroy comes knocking around 8am.
He looks nearly as tired as I do.
“Didn’t sleep? “ I say, as we walk out of the hotel.
“I get paid by the second of footage. I’m looking to make enough that next time they ask me to come back, I can say no. “ Leroy replies.
“Smarter man than I am, Leroy. “ I say, looking around. I’m paranoid, I can’t tell if the looks we are getting are curiosity, or people keeping an eye on us.
I begin to try and tell Leroy about last night, but a man passes with a deep gash under one eye. One of the people from the… event? Last night. And I stay silent.
Sylvia joins us, though we have to hunt down Zeke. About a half kilometer into the living forest, armed with nothing more than a scowl and a notepad. I figure this would be the best opportunity to update everyone on the cult.
“Then Art’s little dance with the devil is over. We leave now. “ Sylvia says, exasperated. She goes through a bag, and I notice that the dull grey prosthesis, actually has a bit of grip and mobility.
“I’m of the same mind. If these freaks have a plan, I can’t see a better time to do it then when the big 6 is in town. “ I agree.
It's about eleven in the morning by the time we get back to the half finished park. We spend nearly an hour trying to find some sign of Art, but no dice. Either people don’t know, or seem wary to be telling people what the boss is up to.
“This isn’t getting us anywhere. “ Leroy says, aiming his contraption at a passing creature, one of the tall, loping, dog like things, dressed as a judge or maybe an old maid. The costume is too torn and stained to tell.
An idea strikes me as the spear wielding handler walks by.
“Private! “ I exclaim, my voice cutting through the piped in music and general din of machine and monster, “ General Ethan Benson, USMC. Name rank and serial number. “ I demand, lying about my rank but doing a damn fine impression.
“Private Montauk, “ He says, snapping to me, I'll leave his serial number out of this, lots of nosey folks online.
“We need to know the location of the primary asset of our mission. “ I shout, not giving the man time to think, “ One Arthur Deus, is this something you can assist… “
A loud chime from a massive clock in the middle of the park begins, cutting me off.
At first I don’t know what happened, my vision suddenly obscured. But then I feel heat and liquid running down my face, look to my hands, soaked in blood.
The man in front of me, the part time private, part time demon wrangler, clutches his throat, a long, thin dagger protruding from it. A lanky man with burn marks and a missing eye standing behind him tears the weapon brutally free.
In an instant the street erupts into violence. Gunfire can be heard, a significant portion of the employees devoted to freeing the creatures from their yokes.
The cultist in front of me grins, his teeth filed and pointed, he waves his dagger, heedless of the iron on my side, or the rifle on my back.
All around me is a warzone, but all my focus is on this one man. He'll be to me before I unsling my rifle, even before I draw my pistol, or knife. Being well armed is good and all, but you never want to have to draw on someone with a weapon ready.
“That was no friend of mine, all I’m interested in is getting out. Whatever you’re doing is between you and God. Yours or mine. “ I say, slowly backing toward Sylvia and the others.
The man grins, then smiles, the, of all things, skips away, singing “ W-i-l-l-i-e, m-o-u-s-e” in a off kilter shriek.
A five foot, dripping, rat like thing dressed as a construction worker runs by, chasing an employee with a blood dripping wrench.
“If we go back without Art, they are going to be passing out lead aspirin. “ I say, glumly.
No one disagrees.
I ready my rifle.
“Do you have anything that could help? “ Zeke asks Sylvia.
She smiles.
“These are not God’s, these are shadows. I have plenty of candles. “ Sylvia says, patting her bag.
Leroy folds up the camera, either having enough footage, or realizing that any more wouldn’t be worth the distraction.
Our search for Mr. Moneybags takes us on a trip through every type of horror you could think of.
Some, were at a distance, brutal, ritualistic killings, bodies strung up from plywood storefronts, demons screeching in forbidden tongues while committing acts never thought of by man.
But others were mad scrambles chased by one of these animal themed horrors. Sylvia trying trinkets, balms, oils, and ashes, while I tried to find some place on the creature it’d feel a bullet.
We take refuge in a shop, the dozens of grinning, plastic dolls, around us, all themed after that vile rat make me want to burn the place to the ground.
I’ve got one magazine left, another two for the pistol, then it’s going to be trying to fight these things with a trench knife and a prayer.
“This fucker is on his own. “ Leroy blurts out, “ I’d rather get a bullet in the back of my head, than get killed by one of these things. “
I’m about to agree, when, like a God Damned ghost, he comes out of a back corner of the establishment.
“And what, ‘fucker’ would that be? “ Arthur says, no ill will in his tone.
Leroy looks shocked and stumbles on a reply.
I don’t.
“What the hell is this? You running some kind of cult, some kind of body funnel for these things? “ I say, rage beginning to take ahold of me. My hand is on my pistol.
There is a look in Art’s eyes, something, off, something wrong, and, old.
“No Ethan. The cult is not my doing, what it is, is a consequence, the cost of doing business you could say.
Our goal, is to see how much mundane effort we can replace with divine intervention. More work the Residents put in, more profit on investment.
So, for our first iteration, we let them have a fairly direct role and influence. But looks like we overshot the mark a little bit.
But that’s why pencils have erasers, right? “ Art looks briefly at the pistol and shakes his head.
“These people are dying! “ Sylvia says, “ Don’t you care! “
“They did the same thing that you did, they signed a contract. Then, they let their friends brew up a cult under their noses, and now they are reaping the consequences.
But it’s all data. Next round, we replace Willie with another prince, one a little younger, a little easier to control. We keep it at a farther distance, put a little more brick and mortar, a little less hocus pocus.
But at the moment, you folks, still have a job to do. “ Art explains.
I’ve made a lot of sacrifices for the greater good, but getting art out of that hellscape, it wasn’t one of them.
Resistance crumbles, what we walk through is a one sided slaughter. Cultists dressed in cartoonish motley swarm around twisted avatars of evil and corporate branding. This isn’t the death I’ve seen in war, this is the kind of slaughter last seen when plate mail and longswords were high technology.
Fires rage and chants bellow from the park as we push the 6 cylinder engine of the truck to it’s limit. Even the trees around us seem infused with vigor and malice. I swerve to avoid, grasping, branches, and fearless, rubbery animals trying to throw themselves in front of the automobile.
All the while, Art sits in the back, serene, calm.
We did our job, got our pay, and when it was all over, I was taken aside.
“Don’t think I’ll forget this Ethan. See, things are changing. Wars, media, information, the world, no, the universe is on the cusp of a total shift. You will be remembered, we will always have work for someone as dedicated as yourself. “ Art says.
“Buddy, this palooka, you’re never seeing again. “ I lie.
When I look at now it unfolded, I can’t help but wonder, how much of The residents they ended up using when they finally brought “Willie World” to the public. How many of those mascots are things torn from another realm of existence, how many of those songs contain hints of the void, enough to keep people coming back without knowing why.
What I’m saying is, it’s not just those old cartoons you need to worry about. This taint, this infection is in everything they touch. Sure, the farther back you go, the more potent it gets, but if you think they suddenly saw the light, we’ll, you haven’t been paying attention.
Let me know in the comments if you’ve seen anything like this, in the movies, in the parks, or the cartoons.
As far as hearing from me again? Well, I’m not the type of guy to retread the same ground too many times, but I think I have one, maybe two more stories that could help you all navigate this world of the corporate being entwined with the paranormal.
Tell me down below if you might want to hear about a friend of mine.
Peter the Sailor man.

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2023.12.14 17:06 Tony_Tanna78 Alka-Seltzer: How to handle a hangover (1978)

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2023.11.21 14:01 therealdocturner If Anything Like This I Happening To You, Go To The Doctor, Now!

I’m not going to say where we live. I’m not going to use our real names.
All of this happened. If any of it sounds familiar or it’s happening to someone in your life, go to the doctor. Don’t wait. People have already died, and we’re not being told.
This is how it started for us.
-
“You haven’t noticed how distant you’ve been the last couple of days?”
“No. Um… I have no idea why. I feel fine. A little depressed, but nothing more.”
My husband promised me and the kids he would do better. I thought maybe it was because he was about to turn forty. We had just got back from our trip to Disneyworld and as far as he was concerned, everything was great.
He ran a small fever for a couple of days after we got home, and it took a while for his ears to pop from the plane, other than that, everything seemed normal.
I felt guilty for having to say something about him being distant. I had to. It was completely out of his character.
A week went by. He was complaining that he felt like crap all the time, but he had no idea why. He was sweating. I made him go to the doctor and they said that he had a sinus infection. Lots of mucus in his sinuses and excessive build up in his ears. They gave him some antibiotics and sent him home.
He woke up one night in a cold sweat. He told me his fingernails were burning. Like there was something underneath them. I had never heard that before. He took a couple of aspirin and tried to go back to sleep.
He didn’t.
A few days went by and he had not slept at all. His mood was worse. He kept flexing his fingers; they were constantly moving.
I looked things up on the internet to see if someone else had ever had the same issue.
Nothing.
One night I woke up and he wasn’t in bed. I found him in the kitchen soaking his hands in the sink. The water was pouring out of the faucet and steam was fogging the kitchen window. He had a box of epsom salts right next to him on the counter.
“George? What are you doing?”
“Oh! Nothing! Go back to bed baby. I’ll be right there.”
“What’s going on?”
“Nothing.”
I walked into the kitchen, and I could tell that he was trying to hide whatever was in the sink from me. When I got closer, I could see that the water in the sink had a pink hue.
I turned my head. There was a pair of needle nosed pliers on the kitchen island.
“Oh my God! George?!”
“I’m ok. Seriously, look at me. I’m ok. I feel way better. I know how this looks.”
He had removed every nail from every finger.
“It looks crazy!”
“I know. I watched some videos on how to safely do it.”
“Are you insane? How to safely do it?!”
“There was just this little voice in my head that gave me the answer. I took a couple of pills after I was done. The pain is gone. I’m not running a fever. I feel great.”
-
I wanted him to see a doctor the next day, and he agreed. I should have insisted that I go along just to make sure he went, but I didn’t.
He never went to the doctor. He told me later that something told him not to.
He slept like a baby for two days. He even called off a day from work. Other than the bandages on all of his fingers, he was himself again.
I told him I wanted him to see a therapist. I was worried.
The morning of the third day, I found him in the garage. He was staring at the wall. He was speaking. It sounded like he was speaking backwards, but he wasn’t.
The words he was saying were in english, but they were all garbled up. A kind of verbal dyslexia. Word fragments that were smashed together at random. That’s the only way I can describe it.
When I walked over and shook him, he immediately snapped out of it like nothing was wrong at all.
“Just sleepwalking I think. I think I was dreaming that I was having a conversation myself.” He laughed it off, got dressed and then went to work.
He came home five hours later. He had threatened to kill a coworker. They fired him. They didn’t call the police because he agreed to leave.
He had no explanation. He was as dumbfounded and terrified as I was.
“I don’t even remember doing any of it. I barely remember coming home. What’s going on with me?”
“I don’t know. We need to get you in to see someone.”
-
I worried he had a brain tumor. I made him an appointment for the next morning.
He began running a fever again in the early evening. I had my sister take the kids for the night. After I dropped them off, I ran to the store to pick up some medicine.
When I got home, I could hear him inside crying.
I opened the door, and the walls of the entryway had been broken and torn out in several places. He was crying in our bedroom at the back of the house.
As I walked through, I could see that he had torn gaping holes in every wall. The bits of wall and the insulation inside had been yanked out and thrown all over the house. Bloody handprints were everywhere.
I found him in our bedroom. He was naked and crumpled in the corner. A sledge hammer was on the floor next to him. His fingers were dripping; the bandages had fallen off.
“Holly! Holly, what the hell is wrong with me?!” He was covered in sweat and his own blood from his hands. He was burning up.
“Oh my God!”
“Holly? Something is wrong?”
“You’re burning up bad.”
“There’s something in the walls baby… I can hear it… it won’t stop talking to me… it’s driving me crazy.”
“You need an ambulance.”
“I need an ambulance.”
I ran to the bathroom and started an ice cold bath. I had no idea how long it would take for an ambulance to get there. We live twenty miles from town.
I called 911 while I dumped all of the ice from the freezer into the bath. There wasn’t much, so I threw every bit of frozen food we had into the water as well. I went back into the room to help him up.
His body was so slick, it was hard for me to get a grip on him. He was barely able to walk to the bathroom, and he slipped and fell into the tub. I heard a bone snap in his leg, but he didn’t even react to it. It was the water he reacted to.
“Too cold. No…too cold…”
He was trying to get out of it. He was starting to speak in those jumbled words. He was begging me to help him out of the cold water.
I tried to explain to him that he needed to cool down and then he started convulsing.
I didn’t know what to do. I held his head above the water and I tried to keep him from thrashing around and hurting himself. I could see that his leg was broken. It flopped around in the tub like a rubber snake.
His head kept going underneath the water. I was struggling to keep his face above it. I could hear the ambulance coming outside and he slowly stopped convulsing.
I felt something warm spill onto my hand that was around his head.
A large insect that looked like a millipede wriggled out of his ear onto the top of my hand. I instinctively jerked away, and I saw the bug plop down into the water.
I pulled him out of the tub; my only thought was to get him away from the thing. I couldn’t get him out.
I could only push the water next to it with my hand, sending it towards my husband’s feet.
I watched the insect writhe and convulse, until finally, it quit moving.
“What’s going on?”
“George?”
“Why am I so tired? Help me… ”
-
By the time we got to the emergency room, my husband’s fever was gone. He was speaking normally. Other than his broken leg and his hands, he was fine.
I had scooped the insect out of the bath water with a plastic bag and I gave it to the doctor at the emergency room. I was surprised when he quickly stuck it in his coat pocket.
He didn’t ask me any questions about it.
They wanted to keep George overnight for observation. They gave him a sedative that would finally knock him out. I fell asleep in the chair next to his bed.
-
It was the middle of the night when a new doctor I had not seen before came back into the room. As my eyes focused, I saw that he had his finger over closed lips and he was carrying a few items.
He squatted next to my chair and whispered.
“I need to check something. Please be silent. Ok?”
I nodded.
He went over to my husband and moved his head to the right. He put some metal tools, a small bottle of rubbing alcohol, and a small plastic container on the bedside table and then he shined a light down into my husband’s ear. I watched him use a metal tool to scrape along the inside of George's ear.
I heard a pop.
He grabbed a pair of long tweezers and used them to pull out a tumor of some kind from George’s ear. A moist sack about the size of a small grape. He plopped the tumor into the plastic cup, grabbed the bottle of rubbing alcohol and then walked over to me.
He squatted down and took one of his fingers and pushed on the tumor until it popped. Inside of it were hundreds of tiny worms. They were crawling all over each other.
I stared at them while he whispered.
“Your husband is a very lucky man. I’m glad you got here when you did. This was about to hatch. Usually the mother stays until it does. The freezing water must have driven her out of her warm little nest. The little ones feed on her when they break out. They spread inside the host. It would have driven your husband completely mad, but not before the offspring would have spread to you and your children and any pets in your house.”
The doctor placed the plastic cup down on the floor and poured some of the rubbing alcohol into it. All of the small worms convulsed and then slowly stopped moving.
The doctor looked back up at me.
“What I’m about to tell you, I can’t say out loud. There’s too much money involved. Have you been to Florida, Alabama, or Mississippi lately?”
“We just got back from Disneyworld a couple of weeks ago.”
“Well this is all I’m going to say. Your husband is going to be ok. Lots of doctors and coroners back east are having similar cases, and those that are speaking up are losing their credentials. Doctors will treat it, but it’ll never be documented. They will never acknowledge it. I’m not going to.
No one is listening, because they’re paid not to. The people who caused this are trying to figure out how to fix it. They won’t. It’s going to get worse.
When you have billionaires genetically modifying insects and introducing them into the wild, you’re going to get mutations. Not just from those insects, but from the normal insects who feed on them. Those mutations that they insist are a myth right now, are starting to spread. Stay away from anyone who acts like your husband has been.”
He got up and left.
My husband’s symptoms were attributed to a psychotic episode.
I warned my close family and friends, but I felt like that wasn’t enough. That’s why I wrote this and I’m leaving it here.
Try and stay safe.

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