Career 25 anniversary cards

Jack walked into the ship’s medical bay with his hands across his stomach, feeling like the damned thing was doing an entire circus’ worth of acrobatics, and a decided look of discomfort on his otherwise handsome face. The Jal’kek doctor, who looked a bit like a mythical Naga with a serpentine lower body and humanoid upper body covered in fine scales, must have thought Jack was pissed or something because he recoiled in terror briefly before composing himself and straightening.
“How can I help you,” he asked Jack smoothly, trying to hide his initial discomfort.
Jack didn’t hold it against him. Despite First Contact happening almost 25 years ago, he knew most species in the galaxy regarded humans with more than a little trepidation. Apart from Terra being classified as a “Deathworld,” humanity had made a name for itself in what was called, by humans, the First Contact War and by the rest of the galaxy as the Terran/Tal’check War. The Tal’check were an aggressive species and were only kept in check by the Galactic Federation, a group of 50 or so worlds determined to stop the Tal’check before they conquered the entire galaxy. Then Humanity stepped onto the stage.
Humans had been trying for decades to unlock the secrets of FTL travel but their lack of it didn’t keep them down. Luna was settled first, followed by Mars (mostly terraforming crews), then Venus and several of the larger asteroids that didn’t have high amounts of valuable minerals. There were teasing issues, as always happens with humans, but they were quickly solved diplomatically with the help of a rather forceful diplomat. The Terran Alliance was thus born. Eventually Terran scientists created the first successful warp drive and made contact with the Federation, which had grown to encompass almost a hundred worlds. First Contact with the Federation went surprisingly well despite the inherent terror most of the Federation species felt at encountering a predator species. First Contact with the Tal’check however, did not. The Tal’check hated humanity from the very first, for reasons no one could adequately explain, even the Tal’check, who set out to conquer Terra almost immediately.
Humanity fought back, naturally, and while their ships weren’t as sophisticated as the Tal’check ships, their captains were adaptable, innovative, and had far better training than their counterparts. The Tal’check, and the Federation for that matter, were used to fighting in a far more formal manner and their officers were exclusively from their society’s nobility rather than promoting those who were most capable.
The Battle of Jupiter was the war’s grand opening and the battle fleet the Tal’check had sent to conquer Terra was swiftly defeated with acceptable losses to the Terran Alliance. Most of the enemy ships were destroyed but more than a few were captured and while some were sent to the tech geeks, who were salivating at the chance to study them, most were retrofitted for human use and turned against their builders. The Federation offered assistance at first, which humanity gladly accepted, but after witnessing humanity’s ferocity and determination in battle, which the Federation ambassadors called insanity, they eventually withdrew their support. The human ambassador had just shrugged, told them that humanity didn’t really need their assistance anymore and went on to discuss a new trade deal as though nothing had happened. This disconcerted the Federation ambassadors a lot. They were disconcerted even more when, after just over a year of fighting, humanity conquered the Tal’check Empire in its entirety.
Rather than exterminate the whole race as the Federation had feared, humanity integrated them into its own alliance and now controlled a vast swath of territory and a military that dwarfed even the Federation. Not only that, but they had gained a reputation as fierce, if insane fighters.
Jack himself was about 6’ 2” with piercing green eyes, shockingly red hair cut in the traditional military manner and, unusually for a ginger, nicely tanned skin. The rolled-up sleeves of his uniform jacket were stretched tight over his biceps and looked as though they might rip with the slightest movement of his arms. He knew he intimidated most people, and most aliens found any human intimidating, so he paid the doctor’s reaction no mind.
“I was actually looking for Dr. Rodriguez,” Jack replied, referring to the human doctor who was part of his squad and had come on board with them when they had agreed to be security for this trip.
The Doctor, whose name was Chal, Jack remembered, looked a little disappointed, but then brightened.
“I’m afraid she went to get something to eat, but if it’s nothing too serious I’m sure I can handle it. I’ve been brushing up on human anatomy,” he said proudly.
Jack hesitated for a moment. Doctor Chal had sounded confident, but Jack had taken it about as well as someone saying they knew how to perform open heart surgery after watching a YouTube video. It didn’t exactly fill him with confidence to put it mildly. His stomach gave another flip and he grimaced.
“Ok,” he said at last and shuffled over to lay on one of the biobeds, whose monitors lit up and began to display his vitals as soon as he was settled.
Doctor Chal eagerly slithered over, a little too eagerly if you’d asked Jack, and pulled out a hand scanner. As he ran the scanner up and down Jack’s body, he glanced at the vitals monitors.
“Your vitals look good for the most part,” Doctor Chal said. “Heart rate and blood pressure are a little elevated, but I’m given to understand that that is normal for humans under these conditions.”
“Great, doc,” Jack said dryly. He knew Chal was trying to be reassuring but he was failing miserably and didn’t seem to recognize it.
After a few more passes with the scanner, Chal looked at the screen with a puzzled expression.
“Hmmm,” Chal said consideringly.
Like most humans, Jack really hated when most doctors did that.
“What,” Jack asked trying not to let his alarm show. “What’s hmmm?”
Chal seemed not to hear him for a minute before he replied in what Jack was sure he thought was a reassuring tone. Jack was anything but reassured. “Tell me, what was the last thing you ate?”
“A roast beef sandwich and a bag of potato chips?” Jack said, more like asked, confused.
“Is that a fairly normal meal for you?”
“Fairly normal, yeah. What’s wrong doc?”
“I’m sure it’s fine,” Chal said, patting him somewhat awkwardly on the head like Jack was some kind of pet. “I’m just going to go run these results through the computer really quick. I’m not entirely sure this scanner was properly calibrated for humans.”
He slithered away into his office before Jack could do more than blink stupidly at him. Jack felt like he’d been hit over the head with a hammer.
A few minutes later he heard, “Doctor Rodriguez please report to sick bay, Doctor Rodriguez, please report to sick bay,” come from outside. It was somewhat muffled by the closed sick bay doors, but it was distinct. Jack tried to breathe slowly as his mind raced with ever more terrible predictions of what was wrong with him.
An interminable amount of time later, the doors to sick bay wooshed open and the tall form of Doctor Rodriguez strolled into the room. She had long black hair, beautiful brown eyes that usually sparkled with humor when off duty, and curves in all the right places. Her skin was that amazing bronze color everyone of South American descent seemed to possess and while her chest wasn’t huge, Jack knew his sister would be jealous of it. If he swung that way, Jack would probably try to hit on her and be shot down as viciously as she shot down everyone on the team who had tried. The veterans on the squad knew better.
She glanced at him lying on the biobed and stopped, shaking her head in disbelief.
“Stevenson,” she said knowingly, her voice like ice. She walked over to the biobed as she kept talking and stopped beside it. “I should have known. What did you do this time?”
“I have no idea.”
She gave him a look that said, just how stupid do you think I am?
“Scout’s honor,” he said innocently, holding up three fingers.
She huffed in amusement. “Like you were ever a scout.”
“Doctor Rodriguez,” Doctor Chal said leaning out of his office door. When she looked up at him, he continued. “Could I speak to you for a moment?”
She frowned but nodded and patted Jack on the shoulder before going into the office. Jack hadn’t even had time to say that he had, in fact, been a scout, if briefly.
A few minutes later, Doctor Rodriguez came back out and stood beside his biobed. She was rubbing her forehead, which did nothing to help Jack’s nerves. He knew she thought him a bit of a clutz with the number of times she’d had to patch up his minor, and not so minor, wounds. Most of which were self-inflicted.
“OK Stevenson,” she said putting her hands on her hips. “Just what the hell was on that sandwich?”
Jack was taken aback and slightly confused by her question. “Ummm, mayo, two slices of roast beef, provolone cheese, and some mustard. Why?”
“And the chips,” she asked, ignoring his question.
“Sour cream and onion.”
She stood there for a minute thinking, then sighed. “Somehow, you’ve picked up some kind of parasite. The readings are a bit off, so Doctor Chal is still going through them, but it looks like we may have to do surgery to remove it.”
Jack sighed and fell back onto his pillow. “Great,” he said dry as dust.
“You’re telling me,” Rodriguez replied. “It seems…”
Before she could continue, Doctor Chal slithered up next to her, a strange look on his face.
“What is it doc?” Jack asked his concern rising again.
“Is there some kind of complication?” Rodriguez asked in a defeated sort of way. Her face conveyed that she wouldn’t be surprised considering the patient.
“Some kind, yes,” Chal replied nervously. “I’m really not sure how to…put this. Normally it would be good news, but…”
When he didn’t seem inclined to continue, even with both humans staring at him expectantly, Doctor Rodriguez exclaimed, “Spit it out already!”
The doctor looked at Jack and tried to smile.
“Congratulations PFC! You’re pregnant!” he said in a jovial tone.
In the stunned silence that followed, a pin was heard hitting the floor somewhere.
…
It was chaos in sick bay for a while after that. Jack contacted his husband, who was also on the squad, and he came bursting into sick bay demanding answers as he rushed up to Jack on the biobed and grabbed his hand. Regulations being what they were, the ship’s captain and Jack’s CO were also summoned to sick bay. Other crew members had heard that something was going on and a few of them came to sick bay to see what all the fuss was about. They were quickly kicked out. Rumors started among the crew ranging from the dangerous to the idiotic as rumors so often do. It was only when everyone was assembled and Doctor Rodriguez had explained what was going on that silence fell again, if only briefly.
“WHAT?!” Roger yelped, his voice a little higher than he would have liked under normal circumstances. These were decidedly not normal circumstances.
“How,” several voices asked at the same time including Captain Finnegan, Jack’s CO. Captain Finnegan had seen a lot in her time in the Terran Alliance Space Navy, but this was a first for her. She kept her red hair cut short enough that the natural curls wouldn’t show, and she was the kind of pale that burned in the barest amount of sunlight but never tanned. Her green eyes were normally stern with just a hint of mischief, but all they showed now was confusion. And probably more than a little humor. It might have been a serious situation, and one of her soldiers may be in serious trouble, but she couldn’t help but find a little humor in it. Hell, if Doctor Rodriguez was any indication, she wasn’t the only one to see the humor in it, but they were both hiding it well. Some of the junior officers weren’t doing such a good job and she saw PFC Stevenson shoot a couple of them glares every now and then. She suspected Specialist Singh was recording the whole scenario on his implants, but she couldn’t be sure. She wasn’t even sure what he was doing there, but no one had told him to leave, or seemed to know when he’d even entered the room, so she didn’t give it much thought.
“I am unsure as to the how,” Doctor Chal replied looking up from a pad, and trying not to appear nervous in front of so many agitated humans. “From my studies, I understand human males are not the ones to carry the children in your species, yes?”
“That’s correct,” Doctor Rodriguez replied. “Human females, such as myself and Captain Finnegan, are typically the ones to carry and birth our young. Males don’t have the anatomy to give birth.”
Captain Finnegan shuddered at the thought of having kids. She was career military through and through. While she wasn’t opposed to the occasional romp while on leave, she preferred children be kept as far away from her as possible. On the other side of the galaxy perhaps. Or even better, in a different galaxy altogether. If they had to be near her, she preferred that they be poached and served on toast with a side of bacon.
Doctor Chal nodded in understanding. “As I said, I am unsure how this happened, but I have a theory.”
“Which is,” Rodriguez asked when Chal’s pause went on a tad too long for her liking.
“The scans reveal that the…fetus has half human, half Glorn DNA,” Chal said slowly. “I don’t know how much you know about the Glorn, but their home world has high levels of various acids. As a result, their reproductive systems involve acid, specifically hydrochloric acid…”
“The same kind of acid as human stomach acid,” Rodriguez asked somewhat incredulously.
“Exactly. In fact, the human digestive system is surprisingly similar to the Glorn reproductive system.”
“Similar how,” Jack asked, curious despite himself. Rodriguez seemed fascinated as well.
“Well…” Chal began. “A Glorn’s womb is built much like your stomachs, very similar in fact. Now that I think about it, their similarities would be a great subject for a study on…”
“Doctor,” Rodriguez exclaimed, throwing her hands up and looking at the ceiling in exasperation. Chal recoiled in terror reflexively before he composed himself. She put her hands on her hips and looked directly at Chal. “We can discuss a paper on cross-species similarities later. How about we get back on track?”
“Right,” Chal said, chastened. “The Glorn are a single sex species and only produce their sex cells when they go into heat once a month, which is actually about two human months. During reproduction, the…receptive Glorn takes the other’s penis into their mouth and…um…stimulates it to release. A valve in the throat ensures that the ejaculate enters the reproductive system instead of the digestive. The sex cells, which are closer to human egg cells than sperm, take in DNA from the cells of the throat as they pass through and the fertilized embryo, or sometimes embryos, then settle in the womb. The acids in the womb bring in nutrients from the stomach, which get absorbed through the protective layers the embryo develops. After gestation, birth proceeds much as it does for humans.”
Doctor Chal finished his speech and looked around at the humans with a somewhat satisfied expression on his face. It quickly turned into worry as he looked at the stunned humans around him.
“Are…are you saying,” Specialist Singh asked, clearly trying to hold back laughter. “Are you saying that the Glorn reproduce via blowjob?”
As the non-humans in the room consulted their implants to figure out what he meant, some of the humans guffawed, some laughed outright, and a few coughed trying to hide their laughter. Captain Finnegan coughed into her hand a couple times, getting her own laughter under control. She couldn’t help the smile on her face though. As she looked at the biobed, she saw PFC Stevenson looking a little green. His husband, Corporal Huxley, looked like he could shit a brick. The two seemed to have a quick conversation through their implants while everyone around them tried to gather themselves.
“It’s a damn good thing humans don’t reproduce that way,” Rodriguez mutters to herself. “Gay men alone would make the population growth unsustainable, even with all the habitable planets in the galaxy.”
Captain Finnegan coughs into her hand again.
“If I understand your terminology correctly,” Doctor Chal says after a moment. “Then yes. Fortunately, there is only one Glorn aboard the ship at the moment, Weapons-master Krulmash, so the identity of the…other father, isn’t in question.”
“BUT I DIDN’T SUCK HIM OFF!” Jack yelled. “I’ve never even talked to him!”
He sounded near tears as he stared into Rodger’s eyes, begging him to believe him. Rodger stared back; expression unreadable. Everyone went quiet as they waited with bated breath. Finally, Rodger let out a sigh and kissed Jack on the forehead.
“I believe you,” he whispered to Jack. “It’s ok baby. We’ll figure this out.”
Jack let out a sob and curled into Rodger’s arms, crying in relief.
“If you did not willingly preform this act with Weapons-master Krulmash, then we must find out how this happened.”
“I have sent a quiet summons to the Weapons-master to report here at once,” came the captain’s watery sounding voice. The captain was a Mabon, an amphibious species that looked a bit like the Creature from the Black Lagoon. “He’s on his way.”
“What’s the gestation rate for a Glorn,” Doctor Rodriguez asked.
“Typically, only about six human hours,” Doctor Chal replied. “The human DNA has slowed things significantly,” he added hastily at seeing her look of alarm. “We have another three hours or so before we need to operate. If necessary, we can remove the fetus in two hours and place it in an incubation chamber.”
“We can’t just cut into his stomach,” Doctor Rodriguez said. “Doing a C-section on a woman is one thing but this…”
“I’ve already considered that,” Doctor Chal replied calmly. “Which is why I sent for Engineer Veela.” He waved over a tall creature with four arms that vaguely resembled a stick covered in brown fur. It’s four eyes gleamed with mirth and Doctor Rodriguez noticed a toolbelt slung around where the creature’s waist might be if it had one she could discern.
“I’ve gotta admit,” it said in a high-pitched voice. “You doctors sure know how to put on a good show. My nest-mates will find this whole thing hysterical!”
“I’m sure they will,” Doctor Chal said genially before Doctor Rodriguez could reply. “Engineer, is it possible to use the sick bay transporter to transport something out of a living body?”
Doctor Rodriguez gave Doctor Chal a sharp look. “You want to use the sick bay transporter to teleport the baby out of Stevenson? Is that even safe?”
“Oh sure,” the engineer said with far more ease than Doctor Rodriguez was comfortable with. “If I can get the sensors tuned correctly it should be safe enough.”
“If? Should be?” Doctor Rodriguez exclaimed, her eyes bulging. “There are two lives at stake here. “If” isn’t good enough.”
“Relax doc,” the engineer said holding up one hand to forestall anymore of Doctor Rodriguez’s tirade. It used another hand to pull what looked suspiciously like a wrench out of its toolbelt. “I’ve got this.”
Without another word, the engineer walked over to a console and began removing a panel from its side.
Before Doctor Rodriguez could say anything, the sick bay doors wooshed open again and in walked a creature that looked vaguely human but had giant bat like ears sticking out to the sides of its head. Its skin was a dark brown color and bulged here and there with muscle. The Glorn Weapons-master towered over most of the others in the room. Only Corporal Huxley stood as tall as Kurlmash and he glared at the Glorn as it stepped into the room.
Kurlmash ignored him, walked up to the captain, saluted and said, “Weapons-master Kurlmash reporting as ordered sir.”
The captain returned the salute and opened his mouth to speak, but the Corporal beat him to it.
“What the FUCK have you done to my husband, you bastard,” Corporal Huxley yelled at him.
“I…I don’t understand,” he replied taking a step back in shock.
“It seems Weapons-master,” the captain replied calmly. “That you have somehow impregnated young, PFC Stevenson here. We are all keen to know how this has happened. Especially since the PFC claims that you two have not been…intimate.”
“We haven’t,” Kurlmash said in surprise. “Pregnant? Are you sure? Are you sure it’s mine?”
His last question was almost hopeful, and the Corporal’s shoulders eased a bit.
“The DNA scans are rather conclusive,” Doctor Chal answered. “If you two have not been intimate then we must figure out how this happened.”
“You said that Glorn only produce sex cells during their heat cycles,” Doctor Rodriguez asked Doctor Chal who nodded in assent. She turned to Kurlmash. “Which means you either just went through a heat cycle or are in one right know.”
“It ended yesterday,” he said nodding. “Doctor Chal was storing my seed for me so my mate could use it to become pregnant upon our return to base.”
“You missed your last appointment, as I recall,” Doctor Chal said.
“I overheard one of the engineers talking about a problem with a freezer. I thought he was talking about the sick bay freezers. I was going to call you about it until I found the container you were using,” Kurlmash replied sounding puzzled.
Both doctors looked at each other in bewilderment. Doctor Chal slithered over to a wall and opened a door, taking out a plastic cylindrical container that had a cone shaped opening at the top. The clear plastic showed the yellow contents of the container clearly.
“There was no issue with the sick bay freezers,” Doctor Chal said. “I’ve had it here the whole time.”
“May I see that,” Doctor Rodriguez asked, a look of puzzled curiosity on her face as she held out her hand. Doctor Chal handed it over and Rodriguez inspected it carefully. To everyone’s shock, she opened the lid and took a sniff. “Smells like…” she began and then stopped, a look of dawning horror washing over her face. She quickly replaced the lid before turning to Stevenson who was watching her warily, one of Rodger’s arms over his shoulders.
“You said you put mustard on your sandwich,” she asked him. He just nodded. “Did it happen to be in something that looked like this?” She held up the container.
All the humans in the room stared at the little container, the very familiar looking container. They had all seen one just like it before, had all used one, sometimes two before. The container in Doctor Rodriguez’s hand looked very much like a plastic ketchup, or in this case, mustard container one might find in any human restaurant.
“Dude,” Jack yelled at the top of his voice. “You jerked off into my mustard?!”
Once again, the non-humans in the room consulted their implants while the humans variously tried to stifle their laughter or not throw up.
“I…I don’t…What is mustard,” Kurlmash asks helplessly.
“It’s…” Rodriguez starts.
“Not fucking important,” Jack exclaims. “You went into my fucking food and jerked off into it! You…you impregnated me! Against my will! Without my knowledge! You violated me! I should wring your fucking neck!”
He tried getting up from the biobed, the look on his face downright murderous, but Rodger held him down, surprise clear on his face.
“Baby. Baby look at me,” he said, his voice calm. When Jack looked at him, Rodger smiled. “It’s ok. I’m right here. Everything will be ok.”
They stared at each other for a minute before Jack broke down again crying and Rodger wrapped his arms around him.
“What is wrong with him,” Captain Finnegan muttered to herself.
“Pregnant,” Doctor Rodriguez whispered to her.
Captain Finnegan jumped and looked at the doctor. When had she gotten so close? Then she turned back to look at Jack and noticed his swollen stomach. Right. The man was pregnant. That was going to take some getting used to.
“Is this normal for pregnant humans,” Kurlmash asked Doctor Rodriguez who nodded.
“Pretty normal, yeah,” she replied thoughtfully. “For human women anyway. Human men don’t normally get pregnant.”
“Ah. I see. So, the death threats are because he’s male?”
“HA! No. Human females will issue death threats too. Usually during labor, along with threatening to cut off the male reproductive organs if they ever come near them again. Fairly standard.”
“I see,” Kurlmash said looking worried.
“What? Pregnant Glorn don’t have mood swings or make threats?”
“No, they have mood swings, as you call them, but I’ve never heard of one making such threats before.”
“Probably because they don’t spend nine months carrying the kid only to be put through agony, sometimes for days, just to give birth,” Captain Finnegan snorted.
“Nine months? Days?” Kurlmash looked even more worried now and he glanced at the biobed.
“Don’t worry,” Doctor Rodriguez told him. “This pregnancy may be a little slower than what you’re used to, but this baby will be here by the end of the day.” She frowned. “Or not.”
She walked up to the biobed and placed a gentle hand on Jack’s shoulder. He looked up at her, his eyes wet and red.
“I’m sorry,” she said kindly. “But no one has asked...and…well…do you even want this baby? It’s not too late to abort.”
Jack stared at her in shock, though she didn’t think it was for the suggestion. She thought it was more because he hadn’t thought of it either.
“I could do that, couldn’t I?”
Doctor Rodriguez shrugged. “Your body, your choice. That’s Terran Alliance law.”
Jack looked to his husband. “What do you think?”
“What are the risks,” Corporal Huxley asked her.
“At a guess, because this an entirely new situation and we have zero idea about anything, I’d say probably the same as the pregnancy itself. I’ve been watching his vitals and as the pregnancy develops, more and more strain is being put onto Jack’s body. A body that was not designed for it. I think he may be able to carry the baby to term, but that’s just a guess. Any pregnancy has its risks, and this is a whole new type of crazy. I have no idea what could happen.”
Rodger looked back at Jack. “Your choice my love. I’ll support your decision; unless it looks like I’ll lose you. I won’t do that. I love you too much, searched for you for too long, to risk losing you.”
“I love you too,” Jack said and the two kissed. And kissed. And kept kissing. Just when things were about to turn awkward, Doctor Rodriguez cleared her throat and the two separated, breathing hard.
“So, does that mean you’re keeping the baby,” Doctor Rodriguez asked.
“Please,” Weapons-master Kurlmash said, and they all turned to face him. He wrung his hands and stared at Jack with a longing look. “I realize I have no right to ask this of you, given the…less than ideal circumstances, but please. My mate and I have been trying to have a child for a long time and, I would really like to start a family.”
“Are you sure they’d be ok with a half human child?” Corporal Huxley asked seriously.
“It…will take some explaining,” Kurlmash admitted. “And probably some time to get used to the idea, but I’m sure the four of us can make it work.”
He stared at them hopefully and eventually Jack nodded.
“Alright doc. Looks like we’re having a baby. But if it looks like I might…ya know…die? Well, don’t let that happen. Dying in combat is one thing. Dying in childbirth? My mother would never let me hear the end of it.”
Rodger snorted. “She may not let you hear the end of it anyway. Not to mention your dad…”
“Please don’t,” Jack said with a groan. “Don’t suppose there’s any way we can just…not tell them?”
Rodger gave him a look and he groaned again. “You’re right.”
“I’m afraid it gets worse, PFC,” Captain Finnegan said with a slight wince. “I’m going to need to file a report with Alliance command. To apprise them of the situation. Alliance medical is probably going to want to know too.”
It was Doctor Rodriguez’s turn to groan. “Fuck! They are going to want to know. Every. Single. Detail. I’m going to be in meetings about this for years!”
She glared at the three prospective parents. “The three of you are officially on my shit list,” she said before angrily turning to talk to Doctor Chal. “We’d better make sure this goes smoothly. The less I have to put into this report the better. I hate paperwork!”

Pretty much I bought the ticket for my boyfriend as a surprise birthday gift, but he isn't free that day. I don't have the option to refund the ticket and it won't let me resell it with my card. I paid 25, but I'm willing to sell for less then that. Don't really got cash like that, so I really need to sell these. Half the money before, and then I'll transfer the ticket.

PRICES REDUCED 5/26/24

Need to pay off some big bills in the coming weeks. All games come from a Smoke-Free and Pet Free Home. Buyer Pays Shipping. I use pirateship for the cheapest shipping prices (usually $12 for a large $10 for a medium and $8 for a small game.) I’m willing to negotiate prices. I want to get rid of everything and really need the money before rent so make me an offer!

Large Games:

Black Angel [4] - $35
First Martians [4] - $15
Fog of Love [4] - $20
Labyrinth: The War on Terror, 2001-? [4] - $45 (With deluxe dice)
Mariposas [4] - $25
Montana [4] - $25
New York Zoo[4] - $20
Noria [4] – $20
Puerto Rico [4] - $35
Sherlock Holmes Consulting Detective: Jack the Ripper & West End Adventures [4] -$25
The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Game [3] - $10
Theurgy [4] - $115
Wingspan [4] - $35
Medium Games:

10’ to Kill [4] - $10
Bloc by Bloc: Uprising [4] - $60
Fast & Furious Highway Heist[4] - $10
Feudal[2] - $15
Fuse [4] - $15
Humans!!! [5] - $20
Humans!!! 2: Sea Food [5] - $10
Kabuto Sumo [4] - $30
Loot of Lima[4] - $20
Ninja Burger[2] -$5 (Or Free with Large Game)
Pandemic [5] - $20
Pandemic on the Brink [4] - $10
Parks + Nightfall Expansion[4] - $50
Red Scare [4] - $5
Set a Watch [4] - $35
Sonar Family[5] - $15
Sunken Sailor[3] -$10
Sushi Go Party! [4] - $10
Wikipedia The Game About Everything [4] - $5
Zombies!!! + Zombies!!! 2: Zombie Corps(e) + Zombies!!! 3: Mall Walkers + Zombies!!! 4: The End... + Zombies!!! 5: School’s Out Forever + Zombies!!! 6: Six Feet Under + ~50 glow in the dark zombies, ~50 zombie dogs, ~ 150 more zombies [3] - $50
Zombies!!! 7: Send in the Clowns [4] - $15
Zombies!!! 8: Jailbreak [5] - $10
Zombies!!! 9: Ashes to Ashes [5] - $15
Small Games:
Epic Card Game [3] - $5 (Or Free with Large/Medium Game)
Fidelitas[4] - $15
Fox in the Forest [2] - $5 (Or Free with Large/Medium Game)
Hanabi[4] - $5 (Or Free with Large/Medium Game)
Hoax[4] -$5 (Or Free with Large/Medium Game)
James Ernest's Totally Renamed Spy Game [4] -$5 (Or Free with Large/Medium Game)
Lunch Money NO RULES [2] -$5 (Or Free with Large/Medium Game)
Mine All Mine [4] -$5 (Or Free with Large/Medium Game)
Nanobot Battle Arena [4] - $15
Poetry for Neanderthals [4] - $10
Rick and Morty Total Rickall [4] - $5 (Or Free with Large/Medium Game)
The Agents All in Kickstarter pledge with ~6 expansion [4] - $20

Me and my wife has currently owned the house we’re living in now for about 5 years. In a very rough and dangerous part of town. We have 2 young kids and don’t want them to grow up in this environment. Our mortgage now is only $600/month. We plan to sell the current house and should have around 50K in equity in which we will use for payment for new house. Our income is about 160K combined not including any overtime or bonuses. We bring home about $8200 per month after all savings/401K contributions. One car payment of $546. Both have small credit card minimum payments($25 & $50). Our youngest is in daycare at $1000/month but we plan to move to a certain area close to a relative who agreed to watch the baby while we work. We are currently looking at houses in the 300-330K range. We spoke to a few lenders and our estimated PITI would be around $2700-$2800 on the high end. Making that big of a jump in mortgage payments is scary 😩. Can we afford this?

Down to just a couple Thor L&T's left. Discount is $1 off per every $10. .
Payments via Venmo, Cashapp or Paypal family and friends. All HD except for some 4K at the top, and one SD at the bottom. . . 4K (MA unless noted) $4.25 unless noted Captain Marvel Clear and Present Danger (iTunes /Vudu) Cool Hand Luke Ghost in the Shell (anime, iTunes /Vudu) Holiday Inn (1942) Jack Ryan Shadow Recruit (iTunes /Vudu) Jurassic World $4 Shazam Fury of the Gods $5 The Sum of All Fears (iTunes /Vudu) The Hitman's Bodyguard (Google/iTunes /Vudu) To Kill a Mockingbird To Sir, With Love (1967) . . MA (HD) $2.50 unless noted 1917 21 Jump Street 47 Ronin A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood $3 Alien Alien Covenant The Amazing Spider-Man The Amazing Spider-Man 2 American Hustle Atomic Blonde Avengers Endgame $3 Bad Words $3 Battleship Bohemian Rhapsody The Bourne Identity $3 Deadpool Dr. Seuss' The Lorax Dracula Untold Enough Said $4 Epic (Blue Sky, animated) Fifty Shades Freed $2 Fifty Shades of Grey (unrated) $2 Furious 7 extended Fury $3 Guardians of the Galaxy vol. 2 Hail, Caesar!
Hope Springs
Independence Day Resurgence $3 Jumanji Welcome to the Jungle Jungle Cruise $3.50 Jurassic Park Jurassic World Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom Justice League X RWBY Super Heroes & Huntsmen part 2 $3 Kingsman The Secret Service Life of Pi Logan $3 The Longest Ride $2.50 Looper Lucy Mr. Peabody & Sherman Mulan (live action) Nightmare Before Christmas $3
Parental Guidance Prometheus Riddick (director's cut) $3.50 Ride Along 2 Secret in Their Eyes Spider-Man No Way Home $4 Spider-Man Homecoming $3 Star Wars The Force Awakens $2 Ted (unrated) Thor Love and Thunder $3.50
Thor Ragnarok $3 Trolls Venom $3 X-Men Apocalypse . . iTunes /Vudu (HD) $2.50 unless noted A Quiet Place Chicago $3 Fences G.I. Joe Retaliation Jack Ryan Shadow Recruit Pet Sematary (1989) $3.50 Star Trek Beyond Star Trek Beyond (might be 4K) $3 Top Gun $3 . Vudu only (HD) $2.50 unless noted All is Lost $4 Begin Again $3 Escape From Planet Earth (animated) Little House on the Prairie season 2 $4 Tucker The Man and his Dream $3.50 Valerian . . Vudu/Google (HD) $2.50 unless noted The Hateful Eight $3 Men (A24) $3.50 Siberia Skyfall $2.50 Wild Card . . iTunes/Vudu/Google (HD) $2.50 unless noted The Cabin in the Woods Hell or High Water $3 The Hunger Games (all four movies) $9 The Hunger Games Mockingay part 1 $3 The Hunger Games Mockingay part 2 $3.50 Mechanic Resurrection $3 Now You See Me The Shack Twilight Breaking Dawn 2 $2 What to Expect When You're Expecting . . iTunes only (HD) $2.50 unless noted Captain America The First Avenger Cowboys & Aliens No Time to Die $3.50 Wall Street Money Never Sleeps . . Movie Spree Ultraman Ultra Q Complete Series $5 Ultraman Neo Ultra Q Complete Series $5 Night of the Living Dead $4 . . SD titles

Fast Five $1

She (25f) is from my hometown, and randomly reached out to me (26m) in June '23 via Facebook messenger. At that point and today I am living 4 hours away in the major city area of the Midwestern state for grad school, and I've also started a great career (things are going good for me, but my future plans are to move back to our hometown area; maybe within the next year). When I say randomly, she literally sent a "wave". We've never spoken before that, but I knew of her because of her family. I waved back, she offered her snapchat, and the rest is history. We maintained regular casual communication. Not every day at times, but it has been very consistent nonetheless. This girl is absolutely gorgeous, so obviously I was interested in her from the start.
We've both experienced what relationships have to offer in the past, and it seems like we are both at a point where we're only interested in something serious. I should also mention that she seems to be introverted and prefers to keep to herself generally. Anyways, there have been several instances where she's sent me very provocative selfies; nothing nude really except for one night where she had been drinking at home, and she made it sound like she didn't really remember. Most of them are standard, like in a bikini or underwear, sometimes it's just a regular selfie with obvious intentional cleavage. I should also add that she sends these in the middle of the night when she knows that I'm asleep. My normal response is to be respectful while letting her know how gorgeous she looks. This is definitely not the basis of our relationship, we have long and meaningful conversations regularly if not every day.
Anyways, around a month ago she asked me if I would ever want to go on a date when I was in town. I responded with a resounding yes, and she acted as if I was joking with her. I gave my reassurance, telling her that she is a cool and attractive girl and that it would be a lot of fun. The reason I hadn't made this sort of move before she did was because I've always been unsure of what her feelings are towards "us". She's complimented my looks before, and frequently tells my how "sweet" I am and how she values our interactions. But it seems like any time I had tried to make an advance towards anything romantic (not sexually necessarily), she wouldn't really shoot it down, but wouldn't foster the advances either.
Anyways, at this point I decided I would take the lead. I set a date for the next weekend (memorial day weekend), and suggested a picnic/walk type of situation. She picked the park where we would go. She and I were both nervous, but she was more nervous (she told me via our messages). So we met up at the park, I gave her a few flowers (small bouquet, she left them in her car so she didn't have to carry them around), and we walked to our picnic spot. I had brought a simple charcuterie arrangement, which we didn't touch at all (I was expecting that we wouldn't eat any of it, more of a formality). It was quite awkward at first, but we did warm up to each other eventually and talked for a few hours, playing an ice breaker card game and general conversation. I think I knew pretty quickly that I wanted to keep seeing her. When we were standing by our cars getting ready to leave, we had the stereotypical awkward standoff. I told her that I wanted to see her again, she agreed. I wasn't sure if a physical gesture was something she wanted as well, so we said our goodbyes and left (rooky mistake I guess, LOL). The next day she did tell me how she wished we had at least done something physical like a hug. I agreed and apologized because I'm not the greatest at reading the room. My bad! Next time I will know...
Anyways, in the next few days she was thanking me profusely, saying how sweet I was (what the hell does "sweet" mean???) and how she absolutely loved the flowers. She had them on her snapchat story and I've seen that they're in a vase on her window. Our communication escalated in terms of frequency and depth. I told her "You can tell me if this is out of line, but I think it's valid because we've been talking for a while, but I do care about you quite a bit". She responded with "I kind of care about you too.." (two periods?????). We're currently planning a weekend trip to see some waterfalls (her suggestion), but we'll probably go on some more dates before that. In general, it seems like I am normally the one to be flirtatious in terms of the things I say. Can I write this off to her shyness? Am I way off base? On paper, her and I are a great match. Our families are somewhat close, and our conversation comes very organically. I am head-over-heals for this girl, and I'm trying to be very calculated with my moves so as to not ruin it. I should also add that at this point, her provocative snapchats have pretty much stopped (not completely). I'm interpreting this as we're getting more serious and I don't think she wants to ruin it either.
She has not been blunt enough for me, and I am not great at reading signals. I have a few questions that I am desperate to get answers for:

• Does it sound like she has intimate feelings for me?
• Should I make more advances towards something romantic?
• Should I cool it down a little?

TL;DR, The girl I've been talking to gives me signals that I'm interpreting as mixed, but generally suggestive of romantic intentions. How should I proceed?

So recently, i got the "come closer to the nano distance" Kurumi card, and i saw the matching Miiko card and fell in love, but i wanted to obtain it through the 3.5 anniversary select. Any help appreciated!

She (25f) is from my hometown, and randomly reached out to me (26m) in June '23 via Facebook messenger. At that point and today I am living 4 hours away in the major city area of the Midwestern state for grad school, and I've also started a great career (things are going good for me, but my future plans are to move back to our hometown area; maybe within the next year). When I say randomly, she literally sent a "wave". We've never spoken before that, but I knew of her because of her family. I waved back, she offered her snapchat, and the rest is history. We maintained regular casual communication. Not every day at times, but it has been very consistent nonetheless. This girl is absolutely gorgeous, so obviously I was interested in her from the start.
We've both experienced what relationships have to offer in the past, and it seems like we are both at a point where we're only interested in something serious. I should also mention that she seems to be introverted and prefers to keep to herself generally. Anyways, there have been several instances where she's sent me very provocative selfies; nothing nude really except for one night where she had been drinking at home, and she made it sound like she didn't really remember. Most of them are standard, like in a bikini or underwear, sometimes it's just a regular selfie with obvious intentional cleavage. I should also add that she sends these in the middle of the night when she knows that I'm asleep. My normal response is to be respectful while letting her know how gorgeous she looks. This is definitely not the basis of our relationship, we have long and meaningful conversations regularly if not every day.
Anyways, around a month ago she asked me if I would ever want to go on a date when I was in town. I responded with a resounding yes, and she acted as if I was joking with her. I gave my reassurance, telling her that she is a cool and attractive girl and that it would be a lot of fun. The reason I hadn't made this sort of move before she did was because I've always been unsure of what her feelings are towards "us". She's complimented my looks before, and frequently tells my how "sweet" I am and how she values our interactions. But it seems like any time I had tried to make an advance towards anything romantic (not sexually necessarily), she wouldn't really shoot it down, but wouldn't foster the advances either.
Anyways, at this point I decided I would take the lead. I set a date for the next weekend (memorial day weekend), and suggested a picnic/walk type of situation. She picked the park where we would go. She and I were both nervous, but she was more nervous (she told me via our messages). So we met up at the park, I gave her a few flowers (small bouquet, she left them in her car so she didn't have to carry them around), and we walked to our picnic spot. I had brought a simple charcuterie arrangement, which we didn't touch at all (I was expecting that we wouldn't eat any of it, more of a formality). It was quite awkward at first, but we did warm up to each other eventually and talked for a few hours, playing an ice breaker card game and general conversation. I think I knew pretty quickly that I wanted to keep seeing her. When we were standing by our cars getting ready to leave, we had the stereotypical awkward standoff. I told her that I wanted to see her again, she agreed. I wasn't sure if a physical gesture was something she wanted as well, so we said our goodbyes and left (rooky mistake I guess, LOL). The next day she did tell me how she wished we had at least done something physical like a hug. I agreed and apologized because I'm not the greatest at reading the room. My bad! Next time I will know...
Anyways, in the next few days she was thanking me profusely, saying how sweet I was (what the hell does "sweet" mean???) and how she absolutely loved the flowers. She had them on her snapchat story and I've seen that they're in a vase on her window. Our communication escalated in terms of frequency and depth. I told her "You can tell me if this is out of line, but I think it's valid because we've been talking for a while, but I do care about you quite a bit". She responded with "I kind of care about you too.." (two periods?????). We're currently planning a weekend trip to see some waterfalls (her suggestion), but we'll probably go on some more dates before that. In general, it seems like I am normally the one to be flirtatious in terms of the things I say. Can I write this off to her shyness? Am I way off base? On paper, her and I are a great match. Our families are somewhat close, and our conversation comes very organically. I am head-over-heals for this girl, and I'm trying to be very calculated with my moves so as to not ruin it. I should also add that at this point, her provocative snapchats have pretty much stopped (not completely). I'm interpreting this as we're getting more serious and I don't think she wants to ruin it either.
She has not been blunt enough for me, and I am not great at reading signals. I have a few questions that I am desperate to get answers for:

• Does it sound like she has intimate feelings for me?
• Should I make more advances towards something romantic?
• Should I cool it down a little?

TL;DR, The girl I've been talking to gives me signals that I'm interpreting as mixed, but generally suggestive of romantic intentions. How should I proceed?

Need some advice on this matchup. I play Boba Green (ECL), and while I have a fun time against Boba Yellow, it is tough to beat them as they just lock down my threats with Cunning and No Good to Me Dead (and sometimes Waylay, though the decks I've seen use that less often) and also Bodhi Rook (vs. Overwhelming Barrage). Then, because I only have 25 HP while they have 30 HP with Chopper Base, once they get ahead, even if we then do a footrace, they will beat me.
For that, I have come up with two possible solutions:
1) I can play Boba with a regular Green base. However, ECL is useful against many matchups, including Boba Yellow. e.g. Clutch takeout of a key aggro player like Red Three or Dodonna, being able to stabilize the board by ECL Steadfast Battalion, ramping with ECL Superlaser Tech, etc. So, I don't like this solution.
2) Sideboard in cards that can heal my base. Reinforcement Walker could be good as that's beyond the Boba Yellow cost curve (i.e. they can't match me tit-for-tat) and their answer would likely be Waylay or No Good to Me Dead. Consortium Starviper might also work here for the Restore, as I noticed Boba Yellow decks tend to have a weaker Space arena - the ones I faced tend to flood the Ground arena instead with stuff like Boba unit, Bodhi, Cantina Bouncer, Gamorrean Guard (which I also run). This may be better but I'm not sure what to sideboard out.
Thoughts? Any other solutions I'm missing?

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To cultivate a meaningful practice with Oracle Card Spreads, start by choosing a deck that resonates with you. Establish a sacred space for your readings and set clear intentions. Regularly cleanse and charge your cards. Develop a connection with each card's symbolism through meditation and reflection. Practice various spreads to enhance your interpretive skills. Trust your intuition and incorporate journaling to track your insights.
Consistency and openness are key to deepening your understanding of Oracle Cards. Oracle cards are a divination tool similar to Tarot cards, consisting of a deck with unique images and symbols. Unlike Tarot, Oracle cards don't adhere to a standardized structure, allowing for greater creativity in design. These cards are used for intuitive guidance, self-reflection, and spiritual insights. Each card carries a specific meaning or message, and users often draw cards randomly or lay out spreads to gain insights into various aspects of their lives or seek answers to specific questions.
Oracle cards are embraced by individuals seeking personal growth, inspiration, and a connection to their intuition.
Oracle cards are diverse, covering themes like angels, animals, mythology, or affirmations. Users interpret the cards based on intuition, imagery, and personal associations rather than a fixed set of meanings.
The practice involves shuffling the deck, posing a question, and drawing cards to receive guidance. Some use Oracle cards for daily inspiration, while others turn to them during pivotal life moments.
The open-ended nature of Oracle cards encourages users to explore their spirituality, fostering a unique and personal connection with the deck.
Regular use enhances one's intuitive abilities and deepens the bond with the cards.To deepen your Oracle card practice, consider exploring different spreads that cater to specific inquiries or areas of your life.
Develop a ritual around your readings, such as grounding exercises or meditation, to enhance focus and receptivity. Engage with the imagery on the cards through visualization and contemplation, allowing your subconscious to contribute to the interpretation.
Maintain a journal to record your readings, insights, and feelings, fostering a reflective process that helps track patterns and personal growth over time. Remember, the essence of Oracle cards lies in personal connection and intuition, making each reading a unique and enriching experience.
Experiment with combining Oracle card readings with other spiritual practices like meditation, crystal work, or rituals to create a holistic experience.
Join communities or online forums to share experiences and insights with fellow practitioners, gaining new perspectives on card interpretations. Periodically cleanse and recharge your cards to maintain their energy.
Embrace the evolving nature of your practice, allowing it to adapt as you grow spiritually. As you become more attuned to your intuition, you may find that Oracle cards become a powerful tool for self-discovery, guidance, and empowerment.
Consider integrating Oracle card readings into a mindful routine, incorporating them into moments of introspection, gratitude, or goal-setting. Explore different spreads or design your own to tailor readings to specific aspects of your life. Share your insights with others or use Oracle cards in group settings for collective guidance.
As you progress, don't hesitate to explore advanced techniques, such as combining multiple decks or creating your own cards to personalize the experience further. Ultimately, the key lies in cultivating a practice that resonates with you, fostering a deeper connection with the spiritual insights Oracle cards can offer.
To further enrich your Oracle card practice, delve into the symbolism and history behind the specific deck you're using. Understanding the cultural or spiritual context can deepen your appreciation and interpretation of the cards. Explore different spreads for specific purposes, such as love, career, or personal growth.
Additionally, regularly revisit and reassess your personal connection to the cards, allowing your evolving perspectives to influence the readings. Continuously expand your knowledge by exploring diverse decks and attending workshops or classes on Oracle card reading. This ongoing exploration ensures a dynamic and evolving practice tailored to your unique spiritual journey.
Grounding exercises help anchor you in the present moment and connect with the physical world. Here are a few simple grounding techniques:

1. Deep Breathing: Take slow, deep breaths. Inhale deeply through your nose, hold for a few seconds, and exhale slowly through your mouth. Focus on the sensation of your breath to bring your attention to the present.
   
2. Body Scan: Sit or lie down comfortably. Pay attention to each part of your body, starting from your toes and moving up. Notice any tension and consciously release it, bringing awareness to each body part.
   
3. Mindful Walking: Take a slow walk and pay attention to each step. Feel the ground beneath your feet, notice the movement of your body, and observe your surroundings. This helps shift your focus from thoughts to the physical experience.
   
4. Grounding Objects: Hold onto an object with texture or weight, like a stone or a piece of fabric. Pay attention to its features, temperature, and the way it feels in your hand, bringing your awareness to the present moment.
   
5. Visualization: Imagine roots extending from your body into the ground, like a tree. Envision these roots grounding you and providing stability. Connect with the Earth's energy as you visualize this grounding process.
   
6. Five Senses Check: Engage your senses by identifying five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. This exercise brings you into the immediate sensory experience.
   
7. Affirmations: Repeat positive affirmations or mantras to center your thoughts. Affirmations can help redirect your focus and bring a sense of calmness.
   

Experiment with these grounding exercises to find what resonates best with you, and use them whenever you need to center yourself or alleviate stress.
To incorporate crystals and rituals into your Oracle card practice, consider the following steps:

1. Crystal Selection: Choose crystals that resonate with your intentions or the specific energy you want to enhance during your Oracle card readings. For example, amethyst for intuition, rose quartz for love, or clear quartz for clarity.
   
2. Cleansing Crystals: Before each reading, cleanse your chosen crystals to remove any previous energies. You can use methods like smudging with sage, placing them in moonlight or sunlight, or using other crystal-clearing techniques.
   
3. Crystal Placement: Position your crystals around your Oracle card deck or spread. You can place them in a pattern or intuitively position them based on the energy you want to enhance. Trust your instincts and the energies of the crystals.
   
4. Setting Intentions: Before beginning your Oracle card reading, set clear intentions for the session. State your purpose and what guidance or insights you seek. This helps align the energy of the crystals and cards with your intentions.
   
5. Ritual Elements: Create a ritual around your Oracle card practice. This might include lighting candles, playing soft music, or incorporating specific colors or symbols that hold personal meaning. Consistency in your ritual can create a conducive environment for your practice.
   
6. Meditation with Crystals: Meditate with your chosen crystals before starting the Oracle card reading. This helps attune your energy to the vibrations of the crystals and enhances your intuitive connection.
   
7. Crystal Grids: Experiment with creating crystal grids around your Oracle card space. This involves arranging crystals in a specific pattern to amplify energy and intention. Grids can be simple or complex, depending on your preference.
   
8. Closing Ritual: Conclude your Oracle card session with a closing ritual. Express gratitude for the insights received, release any energy that no longer serves you, and cleanse both the cards and crystals. This helps maintain a clear and positive energy space.
   
9. Crystal Charging: Periodically recharge your crystals to maintain their energy. You can do this by placing them in the sunlight, moonlight, or on a selenite charging plate. This ensures that the crystals remain potent and ready for your Oracle card sessions.
   
10. Incorporate Elemental Energies: Align your practice with the elements. For example, use earthy crystals for grounding (e.g., hematite), airy crystals for mental clarity (e.g., clear quartz), watery crystals for emotional insight (e.g., moonstone), and fiery crystals for passion (e.g., carnelian). This adds a elemental dimension to your readings.
    
11. Create Ritual Symbols: Develop symbols or gestures that act as anchors for specific energies during your Oracle card readings. For instance, drawing a particular symbol in the air or using hand gestures can amplify your intention and focus.
    
12. Moon Phases and Oracle Readings: Leverage the energy of different moon phases for your Oracle card readings. Perform readings during the new moon for new beginnings, the full moon for clarity and manifestation, or the waning moon for releasing and letting go.
    
13. Crystal Elixirs: Create crystal elixirs by placing crystals in water under moonlight or sunlight (ensuring the crystals are safe for water). Use the elixir to anoint your cards or drink before a reading, infusing the energy of the crystals into your practice.
    
14. Dedicated Sacred Space: Designate a specific area for your Oracle card practice and crystal work. This sacred space can be adorned with meaningful items, creating an energetic container that enhances your connection with the divine and your intuitive abilities.
    
15. Intuitive Crystal Pairing: Trust your intuition when combining crystals with Oracle cards. Allow yourself to be drawn to certain crystals based on the energy you sense or the guidance you seek. Intuitive pairings can deepen the resonance of your readings.
    

Continuously explore and adapt these practices to align with your evolving spiritual journey. The synergy of crystals, rituals, and Oracle cards can create a powerful and personalized experience, enriching your connection with your inner wisdom and the energies around you.

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This is a post I’m copying and pasting from another post I just made, sorry I just don’t have time to type all that up again for this. But I’m hoping it increases my odds of good answers to hit up a couple different subreddits.
I’m a 34 year old man, and I still don’t have a career. I barely have a job, really. I work part-time in a grocery store in an extremely dead-end company. All my jobs have been basically like that. A sub shop here, a burger joint there, a small coffee shop. My whole life, I’ve been financially STRUGGLING, and I live in a house that family owns so my rent is cheap, and I’ve kept my bills small because I’ve had to but.. still, I’m always in dire straits.
Now I’m in my mid-30s, I have a girlfriend I’m crazy about, she’s crazy about me, we’re very happy together and it’s been great. And all of a sudden I’ve gone from this complacent sort of loser content to sit on his ass going on Reddit and Instagram all day, to wanting a comfortable - hell, if I’m being honest even somewhat luxurious - life with this girl. I want to have and raise a family with her, I want our family to have a good life, I want to have it financially handled if someone gets sick, I want us to be able to travel to all the exciting places we want to see and make memories there together, I want us to achieve our beach house dream. Like I reeally want that.
So.. minimum wage 25 hours a week at the food store that never promotes anyone ever and doesn’t offer any raises isn’t going to cut it. I don’t really have ANY skills that would reliably bring me a good income. The way things are with inflation in America right now aren’t exactly helping - especially in this state, and moving out is not an option. But short of becoming Tony Montana or the next Lil Wayne, I can’t begin to imagine how to make the kind of money I need to make to get to my vision.
I’m kidding, I wouldn’t become Tony Montana because well, ya know I won’t spoil the movie or anything, and I think we have enough SoundCloud rappers who need to grow up and get a real job at this point (I was kinda one of them in my 20s lol). But I have nooooo idea where to begin.
So far, I’ve looked into the healthcare industry just a bit. Phlebotomy and radiology, mostly. I figure wherever I land, people are going to need healthcare there, so I should always have work and it probably pays pretty well and doesn’t take a whole lot of school (at 34 with a BUNCH of other personal responsibilities I won’t get into here, I think going back to school for 8 years is not very realistic, especially considering I’d probably just accumulate $100 grand of debt it’s impossible to pay off and I need to start making money quick - so maybe a year certification course type of thing is probably more the way to go for me). I’ve also looked at plumbing. The thing with all those jobs I just mentioned is, I’m kind of a germophobe and have a lot of anxiety around health and if I had my hands down people’s toilets and worked with their probably infected blood all day, I’d probably be a complete nervous wreck regardless of PPE. That’s a whole separate life problem I’m working on in therapy, but believe me when I say I’ve tried everything you can think of and it seems it’s just who I am. I’ve also looked at being an electrician, but again, I have some anxiety about, ya know, b’zzz’ttt! So idk if I can realistically handle those jobs. But maybe I need to man up and face my anxiety and just do it. But then which one?
Another major factor I’m looking at for career options is work/life balance. Hell, maybe I’m asking for too much in America in 2024 in my position. But I don’t want to ever become the absent husband/father type, always working, with no time to have a fulfilling life and enjoy my time here on this earth. Because what’s the point of that? I also highly value my quality time I spend with my girlfriend and want plenty of it, so it’s important to me to keep the workload typically around 40 hours a week. I also need to work out to keep some health conditions I struggle with in check, so I need time and energy leftover for that, too. Otherwise there aren’t many jobs I would be able to do anyways. But again, maybe I’m being unrealistic. Maybe I need to work 65+ hours a week and the beach house will still be out of reach.
In any event, I’m open to basically an endless amount of career options to consider, as long as they get me closer to the kind of life and future I want to build. Basically, I hope something that pays very well and offers a great work-life balance isn’t too much to ask for, and if I’m getting really crazy here, preferably something that isn’t going to overload my anxiety crazily all the time. I can handle high-stress environments pretty well, big time rushes in food service and screaming customers in retail and even poverty never really shook me up lol. But ‘dirty’ jobs where infections and/or death and injury become increasingly a problem might not suffice quite as much as something that achieves my goals without that being such an issue. I’m open to options and advice, though, and I’m done with the pipe dreams of being a rapper or moving to Hollywood to pursue being an actor or becoming an influencer on social media (my 20s were a pretty wild, lost time for career ideas lol). I’m also just getting to a point in treating my mental health that I think I could start really getting out there and pursuing better career goals and holding consistently with them, and my relationship is giving me all of the motivation and confidence I need to do that. I’m just overwhelmed about what in the hell I actually should pursue. There’s so many things. I’d really appreciate some advice and guidance and recommendations based on everything I’ve said. Thank you for reading it. Help me out, point me in a direction that might be helpful to me please!

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I’m a 34 year old man, and I still don’t have a career. I barely have a job, really. I work part-time in a grocery store in an extremely dead-end company. All my jobs have been basically like that. A sub shop here, a burger joint there, a small coffee shop. My whole life, I’ve been financially STRUGGLING, and I live in a house that family owns so my rent is cheap, and I’ve kept my bills small because I’ve had to but.. still, I’m always in dire straits.
Now I’m in my mid-30s, I have a girlfriend I’m crazy about, she’s crazy about me, we’re very happy together and it’s been great. And all of a sudden I’ve gone from this complacent sort of loser content to sit on his ass going on Reddit and Instagram all day, to wanting a comfortable - hell, if I’m being honest even somewhat luxurious - life with this girl. I want to have and raise a family with her, I want our family to have a good life, I want to have it financially handled if someone gets sick, I want us to be able to travel to all the exciting places we want to see and make memories there together, I want us to achieve our beach house dream. Like I reeally want that.
So.. minimum wage 25 hours a week at the food store that never promotes anyone ever and doesn’t offer any raises isn’t going to cut it. I don’t really have ANY skills that would reliably bring me a good income. The way things are with inflation in America right now aren’t exactly helping - especially in this state, and moving out is not an option. But short of becoming Tony Montana or the next Lil Wayne, I can’t begin to imagine how to make the kind of money I need to make to get to my vision.
I’m kidding, I wouldn’t become Tony Montana because well, ya know I won’t spoil the movie or anything, and I think we have enough SoundCloud rappers who need to grow up and get a real job at this point (I was kinda one of them in my 20s lol). But I have nooooo idea where to begin.
So far, I’ve looked into the healthcare industry just a bit. Phlebotomy and radiology, mostly. I figure wherever I land, people are going to need healthcare there, so I should always have work and it probably pays pretty well and doesn’t take a whole lot of school (at 34 with a BUNCH of other personal responsibilities I won’t get into here, I think going back to school for 8 years is not very realistic, especially considering I’d probably just accumulate $100 grand of debt it’s impossible to pay off and I need to start making money quick - so maybe a year certification course type of thing is probably more the way to go for me). I’ve also looked at plumbing. The thing with all those jobs I just mentioned is, I’m kind of a germophobe and have a lot of anxiety around health and if I had my hands down people’s toilets and worked with their probably infected blood all day, I’d probably be a complete nervous wreck regardless of PPE. That’s a whole separate life problem I’m working on in therapy, but believe me when I say I’ve tried everything you can think of and it seems it’s just who I am. I’ve also looked at being an electrician, but again, I have some anxiety about, ya know, b’zzz’ttt! So idk if I can realistically handle those jobs. But maybe I need to man up and face my anxiety and just do it. But then which one?
Another major factor I’m looking at for career options is work/life balance. Hell, maybe I’m asking for too much in America in 2024 in my position. But I don’t want to ever become the absent husband/father type, always working, with no time to have a fulfilling life and enjoy my time here on this earth. Because what’s the point of that? I also highly value my quality time I spend with my girlfriend and want plenty of it, so it’s important to me to keep the workload typically around 40 hours a week. I also need to work out to keep some health conditions I struggle with in check, so I need time and energy leftover for that, too. Otherwise there aren’t many jobs I would be able to do anyways. But again, maybe I’m being unrealistic. Maybe I need to work 65+ hours a week and the beach house will still be out of reach.
In any event, I’m open to basically an endless amount of career options to consider, as long as they get me closer to the kind of life and future I want to build. Basically, I hope something that pays very well and offers a great work-life balance isn’t too much to ask for, and if I’m getting really crazy here, preferably something that isn’t going to overload my anxiety crazily all the time. I can handle high-stress environments pretty well, big time rushes in food service and screaming customers in retail and even poverty never really shook me up lol. But ‘dirty’ jobs where infections and/or death and injury become increasingly a problem might not suffice quite as much as something that achieves my goals without that being such an issue. I’m open to options and advice, though, and I’m done with the pipe dreams of being a rapper or moving to Hollywood to pursue being an actor or becoming an influencer on social media (my 20s were a pretty wild, lost time for career ideas lol). I’m also just getting to a point in treating my mental health that I think I could start really getting out there and pursuing better career goals and holding consistently with them, and my relationship is giving me all of the motivation and confidence I need to do that. I’m just overwhelmed about what in the hell I actually should pursue. There’s so many things. I’d really appreciate some advice and guidance and recommendations based on everything I’ve said. Thank you for reading it. Help me out, point me in a direction that might be helpful to me please!