Frustrating until the end. My son graduated from Albany University this month. My son’s mom and I have been separated since he was 2 years old. He is now 22. I have always been there for him and have endured my ex-wife’s manipulation, including forcing my son to call her significant other “dad.” For many years, she never wanted to co-parent and literally kept me away from many of his school events. I have not been an absent dad; instead, I forced myself into functions and routinely celebrated his birthday at my mom’s house, since my son has 20 cousins and 3 siblings with me. I always pleaded with her to co-parent, but it always failed. When my son was a child, she wouldn’t let him bring his video games to my house, so I ended up buying him a second set of toys for our house. My kid was not spoiled, but he understood the reasons he had two of everything. I tried my best to communicate with her and to let her know that I didn’t think it was okay for my son to live two completely separate lives. I would ask her if, when he graduated high school, it made sense to have two graduation parties instead of one. If she had it her way, two parties would be normal. Because of COVID, there was no graduation, so we avoided having two parties. I always tried to keep open communication with her and compromise if possible. That’s why I reached out to her in April to come together and celebrate our son’s graduation from Albany University. I thought we had finally reached a point where adults could come to the table and compromise. I thought our disagreements were behind us since she agreed to celebrate his graduation at my mom’s house. My entire family gets along with her, especially my mom. There is no animosity between my family and her. My entire family loves her and would still take her side if there was any disagreement. I thought we had finally grown out of our grudges and moved on with our lives.
Today was the graduation celebration. Communication was constant, and she and her kids and family were supposed to show up and help celebrate together. She came in the morning to drop off decorations and refreshments and then left. When the tent arrived and was being erected, I texted her to keep her informed. She texted me back to say she would be back. The party was supposed to start at 3:00, and by 2:00, she texted me to say she was running late and had overbooked her day. She never showed up and didn’t even let me know she wasn’t coming. I asked our son what happened to her, and he said that she was away in Valley Stream and didn’t think she was coming. Valley Stream is about 45 minutes away from our town.
I am still shocked that in the last 22 years, I have tried to reach out and mend things, but I guess it was all in vain. It hurts me because I wanted our son to see us being adults and coming together to celebrate his great accomplishment. It’s sad that she didn’t show up. Although our son was surrounded by family, it makes me think this is the end of me trying to reach across and be the bigger person. I’m considering stopping all communication and blocking her completely.
TL;DR My son graduated from Albany University, but my ex-wife's refusal to co-parent continues to frustrate me. Despite my efforts to be involved in his life, she manipulated situations and failed to attend his graduation celebration as agreed. This has led me to consider ending all communication with her.

Hi friends, I'm not a frequent reddit user, so apologies if anything below was formatted/phrased/etc incorrectly!
tl;dr - Consistent printing misalignment across multiple firmware updates has me wondering if it's time for a new printer, or if there's some esoteric setting or troubleshooting I need to do to get my hardware to cooperate. I am looking for recommendations on a new printer, but am also open to troubleshooting tips for my current printer.
Details: My current home printer is an Epson WF-2830. One of the most common things I need it for is to print price tags for my small business. My current efforts for this involve those pre-perforated tag sheets that you're meant to print on and then tear the tags out of. This is what my current printer is doing when I try to print on these pre-perforated sheets:
The alignment gets worse from top to bottom
This is the left hand column of the last sheet I tried to print. I did have the sheet oriented properly in the printer.
The alignment in the upper left-hand corner is already off, but would be usable. The alignment gets worse from this corner outward.
And this (above) is the full sheet, with the alignment just degrading tag by tag and row by row. Below here is what it should look like:
Behold, my layout
I am using templates provided by the tag manufacturer, OnlineLabels(dot)com, and doing my formatting in Adobe Illustrator. My background is in graphic design, so I know my way around Illustrator pretty well; the alignment is properly formatted within the software (see above).
Printing from Illustrator vs. exporting to .pdf or other file doesn't appear to have any effect on print alignment. I did this successfully on a former printer, which was a Laser Jet M234dwe. Kinda wishing now I'd kept that printer >_>
I am not currently looking at any specific printer models. There are so many options and I don't have much recourse if a new printer still doesn't do what I need it to, so I wanted to seek advice from people who know more about this than I do. So hi : ) I plan to retain my current Epson, so I don't even care if the new printer is multifunction (ie scanning and whatnot) as long as it will allow me to print my hanging tags for work.

Minimum Requirements

• Budget: My husband all but came out and said this could be a birthday present, so nothing crazy expensive, but also not "need to go garage sale trawling to be as inexpensive as possible"
• Country: USA
• Color or black and white: B&W is fine, my tags are all monochrome
• Laser or ink printer: No preference
• New or used: No preference
• Multi-function: No preference
• Duplex Printing: No preference
• Home or business: Home
• Printing content: Graphics that need to be appropriately aligned either for pre-perforated tag sheets, or cutting on a Cricut later
• Printing frequency: As needed
• Pages per minute: No preference
• Page size: 8 1/2" x 11"
• Device printing from: Laptop
• Connection type: Wifi

The Laser Jet M234dwe had enabled me to just print my graphics on cardstock and then cut out my tags myself using my Cricut machine, the alignment was so good. I'm not sure if this is super relevant to the current situation, I just miss that reliability and am currently very frustrated that I can't just do that right now ;_;
If you've made it this far, thanks for reading! I look forward to any input y'all can afford : )

About 7 months ago I had a pretty serious medical issue. Over 4 months, I had 3 different surgeries (2 of which lasted over 6 hrs each) and spent 28 total days over those 4 months in the hospital, for two of those months I was going back and forth to the hospital every day to get a heavy dose of antibiotic through an IV. I have/had an incredible support system which really helped me get through all of this.
With that said, my wife (the most supportive person during this) has two very close friends that she actually set them up and eventually they got married. This couple (m/f for clarity) were the first people I met through my wife when we started dating. I became close with them as well. They shared big life news with us first, I hung out with the wife outside of my wife and his. We had group texts and individual active text threads for all of us. So I considered them really close friends of ours. The weird part, I haven’t heard from them in 7 months. They never once checked in, asked me how I was feeling etc. they did talk to my wife during this time and she told me they knew what was going on with me in real time. I did get one group text on our anniversary and another on my wife’s birthday, but nothing asking how I was feeling.
This really bothered me. I didn’t expect them to sit next to me and hold my hand in the hospital, honestly, the thing that helped me the most was just being kept company via text (and visits from my local friends). I’ve basically told my wife I’m done with them. There’s a party coming up in a few weeks and I told my wife I’m not going but have zero issue with her going. I have no desire to speak with them ever again or support them in any way. They showed me they weren’t my friends, we were friendly by default. My wife is incredible, I will have no issue with her continuing the friendship but she’ll have to understand I won’t be around for things with them (she gets it and is ok with that). What should I do here? Should I let it go? Really hard, people are busy, things slip peoples minds, but this was over 4 months….. that’s a lot of being busy and forgetting things!
TL/DR close friends of mine and my wife never once reached out to see how I was during a serious medical issue I was having that lasted about 4 months

Hello,
I have been brousing this sub for a while and spoke to a recruiter from the careers office and just wanna ask some questions.
As the title states, I'm currently doing a degree in electrical engineering and finish uni in 2 weeks. However, I'm set to do a masters, I'm 24 currently birthday is soon so I'll be roughly 26 shortly after I finish my masters and I was wondering what role to apply for.
For some background information I worked as a labourer during and before uni. I also applied to be a royal marines commando when I was 18. I made it 8 weeks into training and left as I just wasn't mature enough at the time and had a lot of personal and family issues to deal with. I'm doing much better now and was originally thinking of applying for the marines again as an officer however by the time I graduate I will be too old for this role.
I have been preparing to join again throughout uni so I have kept my physical and mental health good and compete currently in a couple sports, mainly olympic style weightlifitng and mma.
Fitness standards pushups:55 1.5m: 8:56 sit ups: not sure pull ups:16
These are what I got at lympstone and I'm confident I can hit these numbers again if not do better. I was wondering with all this background information in mind. Now that I know I can't join as a royal marines officer what would be another option. I only ever thought about marines originally however now it would seem wasteful to not go for something engineering based.
I'm asking as the careers officer asked me what role I wanted to join and I wasn't sure the direction to go down and was hoping someone here could give some information as a good career path given my background. For context my degree mainly focuses on signal processing, machine learning, digital communications etc.
Interests: mma, weightlifting, wrestling, video games, chess, hiking, computers.
TL;DR
24 year old, graduate at 25 (turn 26 shorlty after). Left training for marines at 18 as I wasn't ready. Worked on myself (did sport, degree in engineering) and am now ready and was looking for advice on what role to go for.
Thank you to anyone who reads/responds. Would really appreciate the help.

Not sure if this is exclusive to my family but… I was over at my cousin’s place yesterday for her birthday, she just turned 25. At some point family members had settled in the living room and the discussion switched to my cousin’s new job. Background here is she used to work at Google as a solutions engineer or something… idk. Now she has this new job as a solutions architect. Anyway, the entire family started talking about how much money she’ll make (not actual numbers more like in the future hypothetically making more money) and not to settle for someone who makes less than her etc. her younger brother chimed in and said, “everyone (at school—he’s in hs) thinks we’re rich” and immediately her (my cousin) and her mom said “omg don’t say that” idk if it was because they were embarrassed by him vocalizing what they wanted the rest of us to think or because they didn’t want to get bad luck because it was said out loud but the thing that fucking annoys me is… you are constantly talking about money, how much you make, how much I make and now apparently calling you rich is too over the top? I mean they’re definitely an upper middle class family so why pretend that that’s not what you are? It’s like this fake veneer of modesty they want to put on for who I have no idea. Honestly growing up with them it was like this constantly even when my cousins didn’t have jobs (her older brother is a dr) even when it comes to the places we live. They’re always making fun of the city I live in because there’s a higher immigrant population than theirs and on the surface it all seems like a joke but there’s an underlying layer of competitiveness and superiority from these comments. On top of that I make so little money in comparison and I’m five years older lol. I can definitely admit it’s jealousy on my part but I just feel like that entire family wants to be the main character in my story haha. The most annoying part is my cousins grew up much more privileged than my sister and I… our parents both worked and didn’t have skilled jobs so they didn’t progress up any corporate ladder whereas my uncle was the sole breadwinner for his family but had a skilled professional job which paid well so he could support his family of 5 on a single income. Tbh it’s also a matter of drive, I’m not as ambitious as my cousin’s family but ugh just so sick of people talking about income constantly. I can’t even tell if anything I wrote is coherent/resonates with anyone but whatever I’m not double checking this.

Looking for advice/thoughts on setting up ClickUp to manage both work projects and "life admin." I'm using the Personal Workspace Layout and have no collaborators.
I know that it's helpful to start as simply as possible and add complexity as it becomes actually needed. The thing is, I'm importing a few projects already underway (plus a lot of small tasks of varying value), and want to avoid defaulting to my familiar old systems without assessing whether they're actually working for me, or are a good fit for ClickUp.
Assess my setup and give me feedback on where to go from here! I've included a ton of detail on my current setup below. If it's TL;DR, my more general question is: Tell me how you set up ClickUp to handle both work and life admin projects. How are you using categories, status, priorities, tags, and task types? I'm having trouble figuring out how to use them, especially since there seems to be a lot of potential overlap between them. Or, what advice do you have for migrating to ClickUp with a couple complex projects already underway, plus a lot of small tasks?
For context, here's how I have ClickUp set up right now. It's pretty simple but I'm still not clear whether it's the right approach (and FYI, I'm not wedded to it at all), plus there are still lots of components that don't neatly fit anywhere in my current setup:

• I have ClickUp divided into three spaces: Active Projects (multi-step projects with clear outcomes and/or deliverables), Areas of Focus (task lists divided up by a broader work or life "area"), plus a space I'm ignoring where archived projects and messy old things live..
  • Under Active Projects, I have folders for each class I'll be teaching (and because it's summer, right now they're split into prep work for upcoming classes, and wrap-up for the couple last to-do items left over from the spring).
  • Under Areas of Focus, I tend to keep lists of professional admin and personal life admin tasks that aren't part of a larger project (like paying bills or rent.

Next, there are a few different types of things I'm trying to plan and keep track of. As mentioned, I'm not really sure how I should be thinking about them through the framework of categories, status, priorities, tags, and task types.

• Active projects with a specific, concrete outcome. Mostly these projects are longer-term things, sometimes with several potential paths they could take depending on results of earlier tasks, but other times they're just 1-2wk projects that have lots of little steps I need to keep track of. Some real-life examples on my list right now:
  1. Work: Set up a class I'll be teaching in the fall. I need to do a bunch of prep work for this, some of which is pretty clear (set up course homepage and revise syllabus to include XYZ things; revise grade breakdown using these rules, & implement breakdown in Canvas), and other of which is fairly inchoate (e.g. review these five texts and decide which to teach; find an open-source subject-specific text; refine course structure as needed based on the texts I end up using). Then, there are semi-ongoing tasks that will come into play once I'm actually teaching the class (e.g. prep/review the thing I'll be teaching next week; set up assignments due next week so they're ready to go when the start date rolls around; grade assignments X, Y, Z; a weekly review of the syllabus & update deadlines as needed). Then wrap-up tasks that happen pretty routinely at the end of the semester, and one-off "respond to X's grade query email" type tasks. (Many of these things could be part of a template, but I don't need to cross that bridge yet.) How to organize the giant project of "put together, teach, and wrap up X class"? What's the relationship between the big project full of kinda sequential steps and the small "Answer X email" tasks that I mostly put into a project manager so I don't forget about them?
  2. Work: Various small professional development projects that in the past I've thought of as a series of sequential tasks, e.g. "Apply for X grant" (in this case, small individual artist grants for $1k-$20k, not big, collaboratively-written NSF grants). Under "Apply..." is a list of five different pieces I need to put together, one or two of which will need multiple rounds of refinement, while the rest will be relatively quick and easy. This type of project usually comes together in a couple weeks or less, and typically I'll have several active at once. (I usually have a dozen others on my radar at any given moment, but only decide to apply for 1-2 at any time. I keep up with these deadlines via a Google Sheet and a sticky note on my Mac desktop, and in the past only brought them into a project manager once I'd committed to a specific deadline-driven thing, or if I needed a reminder to check on one that has a deadline that varies annually.)
  3. Personal: Research summer travel possibilities, map out a timeline that fits scheduling constraints and mode of travel (one subtask that's a small project in and of itself: research buying a fiberglass camper shell for truck, & if that makes sense to do we'll drive, otherwise we'll fly or take the train). This is still in the research stage, so there aren't many actual tasks yet, but will be in a month or so.
  4. Avocational: Facilitate a large, slow-moving bylaws revision project for an organization I'm involved with. I'm at the beginning stages of this one, but have a pretty good idea of the different stages of this project and what the path to completion will look like. It'll be a big project once it gets off the ground, but for now it's just in the "assembling ideas" stage.
• Ongoing & one-off tasks with varying priority levels (e.g. things I need to do regularly vs. things I'd like to do regularly but don't necessarily get to).
  • Necessary Tasks like paying rent and bills, which are typically pretty straightforward and non-negotiable. Also things like updating the finances spreadsheet I share with my partner, which ideally happens weekly but which realistically I don't get around to more than once a month if that.
  • One-Off Tasks that start cropping up, especially once the semester is underway (e.g. "Answer X email"). Some of these are essential, others don't need to happen (but should for a smoother semester), and plenty are totally optional but worth doing if I have the time. When I'm bogged down, I don't want to think about those totally optional tasks at all, but when I'm feeling pretty unencumbered, they're worth tending to.
• Other things I can't figure out how to classify/organize:
  • Backburner tasks & projects, both work-related and life admin. (How to label and filter backburner tasks that I need to do "soon" vs. "eventually" vs. "maybe, someday, who even knows"?)
    • Some of these are important but not yet active (e.g. applying for that aforementioned grant, for instance, which I don't need to actively think about until next spring when the deadline approaches, though I do often start drafting/refining materials in advance, so it's nice to have a clear holding place for those).
    • Others are aspirational (for instance, "Organize the garage" is a backburner task that will turn into a full project once I start working on it & actually identifying specific subtasks, e.g. put specific thing on FB Marketplace, or buy a set of storage bins). I'd like to clearly delineate between this sort of thing; I don't need to see "Organize the garage" unless I'm doing a big review of the backburner items once a month or so and moving a handful into active projects/tasks.
  • Mosquito tasks: These tasks should happen "soon" or "eventually," but they're not urgent and if they end up never being completed at all, that's usually nbd. Realistically I might do them in the next couple weeks, but probably not in the next few days. These kinds of tasks are helpful to keep in ClickUp so they stay on my radar (and one benefit of that is that for a task like "Email so-and-so to ask X question," I'll often end up drafting half an initial email in a comment, then forgetting about it for a few weeks and coming back to find that email already half-drafted). Mosquito tasks include:
    • Reminders (to check on an important or not-so-important upcoming professional deadline that hasn't been posted yet, & to keep doing this until that concrete deadline appears, at which point it turns into an actual task; upcoming birthday reminders; to get a book back from someone who'd borrowed it, etc).
    • Personal CRM, my most frequent mosquito task. I've done fieldwork around the world and consider keeping in touch with friends/colleagues/informants from faraway as part of my professional responsibilities (but not urgent whatsoever), so I like to keep these things on my radar without letting them distract me from my active, necessary tasks & projects.
    • Ideas, possibilities, and other inchoate things that ended up in ClickUp when I migrated from Todoist, some of which are basically just notes-to-self, and other of which are smaller tasks/projects that I may someday pick back up, all of which I feel sentimental about and don't want to get rid of even though I'm not going to sort through them regularly. These pretty clearly fall under "backburner" and "maybe, someday, who even knows." (Should I break the "Not Started" status into "Backburner: eventually" and "Backburner: maybe, someday, who knows" to delineate these?) Feel free to ignore this category!
  • A Morning/Evening Routine that should reset every day, regardless of whether I've checked every item off from the previous day. (This is probably the only sort of task I want to reset like this, and honestly it's pretty low-priority.)

Give me advice on how to organize all these things, please! Or just tell me about your ClickUp setup for work and life admin projects! Or give me advice for migrating to ClickUp with a bunch of tasks and a couple complex projects already underway, rather than starting from complete scratch!

So this is going to be a long story, but a very intriguing one (or so my friends say). Bear with me and if you could offer some advice on what to do please share. I know I'm probably just young and naive but I feel like the pain will never stop. Like I'm going to always be held back by this particular experience.
Also sorry for any grammatical or spelling errors, English isn't my first language.
So all of this begins October of 2022 when I 18M (at the time) moved to a new city to study film. I was lucky enough to have good grades and be so passionate about this art that it kind of felt incredible to have this new beginning. I rented a small house which I decorated with my collections and all my stuff and ended up loving every second spend in it.
I'm Not very social. Thats just a fact. I've always had my school friends and some people from other activities but none of them really felt like they understood me. No sade to them, I really love them, it's just that I know my hobbies and personality are niece and weird so we don't always see eye to eye. So I wanted to overcome my social anxiety and meet new people.
For the first semester I was all alone. Completely. Spent days upon days without leaving my house if I didn't have school and even didn't have any actual human interaction if not necessary. I didn't realise how much I was hurting myself. The Second semester, someone approached me in school and asked if I could help them with the editing for their final movie, let's call him Jacob 18M. I already was searching for a group project to join in order to pass the class so this felt like a sweet deal. The group was Jacob and let's call them Ellie 18F and Hannah 18F.
With time we started talking about more then just the movie. I was really surprised by how many things we had in common. It was the first time someone I met liked musical theatre or (and this is gonna sound sad, please don't judge me) people didn't want me to leave whenever I approached them. They invited me to things, to their homes and after school and to trips at the beach ect. We were together almost every day. Till late at night or through it. Just the 4 of us. Felt like we could rule the world.
One day i thought Ellie was flirting with me. That was a weird feeling. I'm not very good looking and had a lot of extra weight so that was pretty much the first time but my friends told me that was the case from what I was describing. I mentioned it to Jacob and he told me something I didn't expect. He told me him and Ellie were in an open relationship and were hiding it from everyone except Hannah because of his ex who was in school with us. He also confessed he once had a crush on me and that's why he approached me in the first place. He also saw Ellie flirting with me but was ok with it due to the "rules of their relationship".
I was ok with not having a romantic relationship with Ellie. She would actually become one of the closest friends I've ever had. Or so I thought.
I actually started having a crush on Hannah. She loved some of the movies I loved. Had some of my quirks so I didn't feel ashamed around her and she started watching my favourite tv show with me. During our time together everyone (even her sister and Jacob who found out I liked her) told us that when we were together we could only see each other. As if we had a unique way of communication that nobody else could understand.
I confessed my crush and she told me she felt the same way but that there where 2 problems. First that she gets very anxious about relationships, has only ever been to one and had never kissed anyone. I assured her I wasn't going to pressure anything and I only cared for her and wanted to go on a date sometime. She replied she would like that very much. The second problem she confessed was that she was in love with Jacob for months now but nobody knew. Then everything made sense. The things she did for him and all. How she acted around him. I was surprised I didn't notice it before. She told me she wanted to get over it and proceed to ask to kiss me. We kissed a lot but nothing more that night. She went home after a few hours.
The next day Hannah she felt very distant. We wanted to go to the movies with Ellie but she disappeared all day. Late at night she asked my to go for a walk since we lived near each other. Then she told me she wanted to forget everything and last night was a mistake. That her anxiety has gotten into her and although she really wanted a relationship she couldn't be in one. The next few days we talked again and she said she didn't share any of this with Jacob to have someone in the group I could talk to if I needed help. Ellie was that for her.
It was already summer so we all went to our home towns. I missed her a ton. We stilled talked and the other 2 knew something was off with me. About 2 moths later we all went to Hannah's summerhouse for vacation. We were having fun, getting drunk and all that 19-year old stuff. One night me and Hannah were watching my show together and the time felt right so I asked to kiss her. She told me no and finally told me the truth. Turns out she liked that we flirted but after kissing me she realised it wasn't anything more. Also everyone knew except me. But after all this time I had realised I was in love with this girl. I told her if she could keep all of this to herself and she said yes.
We were all still friends. But I couldn't let go. My mental health began to decent and I started feeling like they would leave me out of stuff to go hang out alone and during October I tried talking some time away to see if they would even talk to me if I didn't. They didn't even say good morning once. I tried again and again. Jacob and Ellie said we all need to talk together. They repeated the same words. Like as if it was rehearsed. I went to "the talk".
Jacob did most of the talking. He talked about boundaries and how after everything between me and Hannah the group hasn't been the same. That after I didn't tell him what happened in our vacation they went to her and forced Hannah to do so. They where all attacking me. I heard lie after lie and all followed up with "we just need some time" and that all of this was cause they loved me.
I have discussed what they accused me of with friends, family and therapists. Although I didn't not believe it at first they all confirmed it was finding little details in my day-to-day behaviour (unrelated to all of the above) and using it to kick me out. They didn't intend of even speaking to me again. Lies feed to everyone by Jacob.
I went away. I don't know if it was for the better. But for a few weeks at first and then months later, I went back to my home town. Their lies became actual blame and I got a message from Ellie saying that we are done (just one month after trying to convince me they needed time and confessing she in particular didn't even notice anything until her boyfriend accused me).
Last time I saw any of them was in December when I gave Hannah her Christmas present. I told her I wasn't trying to get her back and I would continue to keep my distance since my first priority is what she wants and I meant that. I really do love her and would do anything for her to be happy. But I miss her a ton.
It's been 5 months since then. I stopped going to school and kept my distance from anyone related to that life. I have depression and cannot think about anything else. I heard that Jacob still talk shut about me to everyone. I have realised what has happened and have discussed this with multiple common friends who have confirmed this. Jacob is Manipulating the other 2 because of the bad relationship with his parents. He knows Ellie won't do anything with anyone else despite the "open" relationship due to her luck of confidence (so it only works for him). She need him to operate in public and to deal with her extreme anxiety so he takes advantage of that and Hannah follows him everywhere with the excuse of just being a good friend.
There are so many things I couldn't include (this is a hugh post already) about more lies and proof that they where bad for me. But I can't move on. I have seeked medical help but I just cant imagine my life in the future without them. Everything is a reminder of what we've been through. Jacob used to call me his family and when I begged him for our friendship back he didn't even care. Not on my birthday, not on new years... never. I lost all of them.
I'm back now. Not sure why, whether I'm back to continue my studies or to see if I could win them back. If I could have Hannah in my life in sime form. But I'll probably see them tomorrow morning (I randomly walked behind them today, don't think they noticed me).
What should I do?
TL,DR: The girl I'm in love with stopped talking to me along with my 2 best friends. I can't move on and I'm supposed to face them again in school after not seeing them for months. They all lied to me and nothing seem to help. I have depression and I dont want to feel like this for the rest of my life.

So this is going to be a long story, but a very intriguing one (or so my friends say). Bear with me and if you could offer some advice on what to do please share. I know I'm probably just young and naive but I feel like the pain will never stop. Like I'm going to always be held back by this particular experience.
Also sorry for any grammatical or spelling errors, English isn't my first language.
So all of this begins October of 2022 when I 18 M (at the time) moved to a new city to study film. I was lucky enough to have good grades and be so passionate about this art that it kind of felt incredible to have this new beginning. I rented a small house which I decorated with my collections and all my stuff and ended up loving every second spend in it.
I'm Not very social. Thats just a fact. I've always had my school friends and some people from other activities but none of them really felt like they understood me. No sade to them, I really love them, it's just that I know my hobbies and personality are niece and weird so we don't always see eye to eye. So I wanted to overcome my social anxiety and meet new people.
For the first semester I was all alone. Completely. Spent days upon days without leaving my house if I didn't have school and even didn't have any actual human interaction if not necessary. I didn't realise how much I was hurting myself. The Second semester, someone approached me in school and asked if I could help them with the editing for their final movie, let's call him Jacob 18 M. I already was searching for a group project to join in order to pass the class so this felt like a sweet deal. The group was Jacob and 2 girls, let's call them Ellie 18 F and Hannah 18 F.
With time we started talking about more then just the movie. I was really surprised by how many things we had in common. It was the first time someone I met liked musical theatre or (and this is gonna sound sad, please don't judge me) people didn't want me to leave whenever I approached them. They invited me to things, to their homes and after school and to trips at the beach ect. We were together almost every day. Till late at night or through it. Just the 4 of us. Felt like we could rule the world.
One day i thought Ellie was flirting with me. That was a weird feeling. I'm not very good looking and had a lot of extra weight so that was pretty much the first time but my friends told me that was the case from what I was describing. I mentioned it to Jacob and he told me something I didn't expect. He told me him and Ellie were in an open relationship and were hiding it from everyone except Hannah because of his ex who was in school with us. He also confessed he once had a crush on me and that's why he approached me in the first place. He also saw Ellie flirting with me but was ok with it due to the "rules of their relationship".
I was ok with not having a romantic relationship with Ellie. She would actually become one of the closest friends I've ever had. Or so I thought.
I actually started having a crush on Hannah. She loved some of the movies I loved. Had some of my quirks so I didn't feel ashamed around her and she started watching my favourite tv show with me. During our time together everyone (even her sister and Jacob who found out I liked her) told us that when we were together we could only see each other. As if we had a unique way of communication that nobody else could understand.
I confessed my crush and she told me she felt the same way but that there where 2 problems. First that she gets very anxious about relationships, has only ever been to one and had never kissed anyone. I assured her I wasn't going to pressure anything and I only cared for her and wanted to go on a date sometime. She replied she would like that very much. The second problem she confessed was that she was in love with Jacob for months now but nobody knew. Then everything made sense. The things she did for him and all. How she acted around him. I was surprised I didn't notice it before. She told me she wanted to get over it and proceed to ask to kiss me. We kissed a lot but nothing more that night. She went home after a few hours.
The next day Hannah she felt very distant. We wanted to go to the movies with Ellie but she disappeared all day. Late at night she asked my to go for a walk since we lived near each other. Then she told me she wanted to forget everything and last night was a mistake. That her anxiety has gotten into her and although she really wanted a relationship she couldn't be in one. The next few days we talked again and she said she didn't share any of this with Jacob to have someone in the group I could talk to if I needed help. Ellie was that for her.
It was already summer so we all went to our home towns. I missed her a ton. We stilled talked and the other 2 knew something was off with me. About 2 moths later we all went to Hannah's summerhouse for vacation. We were having fun, getting drunk and all that 19-year old stuff. One night me and Hannah were watching my show together and the time felt right so I asked to kiss her. She told me no and finally told me the truth. Turns out she liked that we flirted but after kissing me she realised it wasn't anything more. Also everyone knew except me. But after all this time I had realised I was in love with this girl. I told her if she could keep all of this to herself and she said yes.
We were all still friends. But I couldn't let go. My mental health began to decent and I started feeling like they would leave me out of stuff to go hang out alone and during October I tried talking some time away to see if they would even talk to me if I didn't. They didn't even say good morning once. I tried again and again. Jacob and Ellie said we all need to talk together. They repeated the same words. Like as if it was rehearsed. I went to "the talk".
Jacob did most of the talking. He talked about boundaries and how after everything between me and Hannah the group hasn't been the same. That after I didn't tell him what happened in our vacation they went to her and forced Hannah to do so. They where all attacking me. I heard lie after lie and all followed up with "we just need some time" and that all of this was cause they loved me.
I have discussed what they accused me of with friends, family and therapists. Although I didn't not believe it at first they all confirmed it was finding little details in my day-to-day behaviour (unrelated to all of the above) and using it to kick me out. They didn't intend of even speaking to me again. Lies feed to everyone by Jacob.
I went away. I don't know if it was for the better. But for a few weeks at first and then months later, I went back to my home town. Their lies became actual blame and I got a message from Ellie saying that we are done (just one month after trying to convince me they needed time and confessing she in particular didn't even notice anything until her boyfriend accused me).
Last time I saw any of them was in December when I gave Hannah her Christmas present. I told her I wasn't trying to get her back and I would continue to keep my distance since my first priority is what she wants and I meant that. I really do love her and would do anything for her to be happy. But I miss her a ton.
It's been 5 months since then. I stopped going to school and kept my distance from anyone related to that life. I have depression and cannot think about anything else. I heard that Jacob still talk shut about me to everyone. I have realised what has happened and have discussed this with multiple common friends who have confirmed this. Jacob is Manipulating the other 2 because of the bad relationship with his parents. He knows Ellie won't do anything with anyone else despite the "open" relationship due to her luck of confidence (so it only works for him). She need him to operate in public and to deal with her extreme anxiety so he takes advantage of that and Hannah follows him everywhere with the excuse of just being a good friend.
There are so many things I couldn't include (this is a hugh post already) about more lies and proof that they where bad for me. But I can't move on. I have seeked medical help but I just cant imagine my life in the future without them. Everything is a reminder of what we've been through. Jacob used to call me his family and when I begged him for our friendship back he didn't even care. Not on my birthday, not on new years... never. I lost all of them.
I'm back now. Not sure why, whether I'm back to continue my studies or to see if I could win them back. If I could have Hannah in my life in sime form. But I'll probably see them tomorrow morning (I randomly walked behind them today, don't think they noticed me).
Please if you have any advice share it. I just want to feel happy again. Even for a second.
TL,DR: The girl I'm in love with stopped talking to me along with my 2 best friends. I can't move on and I'm supposed to face them again in school after not seeing them for months. They all lied to me and nothing seem to help. I have depression and I dont want to feel like this for the rest of my life.

So this is going to be a long story, but a very intriguing one (or so my friends say). Bear with me and if you could offer some advice on what to do please share. I know I'm probably just young and naive but I feel like the pain will never stop. Like I'm going to always be held back by this particular experience.
Also sorry for any grammatical or spelling errors, English isn't my first language.
So all of this begins October of 2022 when I 18 M (at the time) moved to a new city to study film. I was lucky enough to have good grades and be so passionate about this art that it kind of felt incredible to have this new beginning. I rented a small house which I decorated with my collections and all my stuff and ended up loving every second spend in it.
I'm Not very social. Thats just a fact. I've always had my school friends and some people from other activities but none of them really felt like they understood me. No sade to them, I really love them, it's just that I know my hobbies and personality are niece and weird so we don't always see eye to eye. So I wanted to overcome my social anxiety and meet new people.
For the first semester I was all alone. Completely. Spent days upon days without leaving my house if I didn't have school and even didn't have any actual human interaction if not necessary. I didn't realise how much I was hurting myself. The Second semester, someone approached me in school and asked if I could help them with the editing for their final movie, let's call him Jacob 18 M. I already was searching for a group project to join in order to pass the class so this felt like a sweet deal. The group was Jacob and 2 girls, let's call them Ellie 18 F and Hannah 18 F.
With time we started talking about more then just the movie. I was really surprised by how many things we had in common. It was the first time someone I met liked musical theatre or (and this is gonna sound sad, please don't judge me) people didn't want me to leave whenever I approached them. They invited me to things, to their homes and after school and to trips at the beach ect. We were together almost every day. Till late at night or through it. Just the 4 of us. Felt like we could rule the world.
One day i thought Ellie was flirting with me. That was a weird feeling. I'm not very good looking and had a lot of extra weight so that was pretty much the first time but my friends told me that was the case from what I was describing. I mentioned it to Jacob and he told me something I didn't expect. He told me him and Ellie were in an open relationship and were hiding it from everyone except Hannah because of his ex who was in school with us. He also confessed he once had a crush on me and that's why he approached me in the first place. He also saw Ellie flirting with me but was ok with it due to the "rules of their relationship".
I was ok with not having a romantic relationship with Ellie. She would actually become one of the closest friends I've ever had. Or so I thought.
I actually started having a crush on Hannah. She loved some of the movies I loved. Had some of my quirks so I didn't feel ashamed around her and she started watching my favourite tv show with me. During our time together everyone (even her sister and Jacob who found out I liked her) told us that when we were together we could only see each other. As if we had a unique way of communication that nobody else could understand.
I confessed my crush and she told me she felt the same way but that there where 2 problems. First that she gets very anxious about relationships, has only ever been to one and had never kissed anyone. I assured her I wasn't going to pressure anything and I only cared for her and wanted to go on a date sometime. She replied she would like that very much. The second problem she confessed was that she was in love with Jacob for months now but nobody knew. Then everything made sense. The things she did for him and all. How she acted around him. I was surprised I didn't notice it before. She told me she wanted to get over it and proceed to ask to kiss me. We kissed a lot but nothing more that night. She went home after a few hours.
The next day Hannah she felt very distant. We wanted to go to the movies with Ellie but she disappeared all day. Late at night she asked my to go for a walk since we lived near each other. Then she told me she wanted to forget everything and last night was a mistake. That her anxiety has gotten into her and although she really wanted a relationship she couldn't be in one. The next few days we talked again and she said she didn't share any of this with Jacob to have someone in the group I could talk to if I needed help. Ellie was that for her.
It was already summer so we all went to our home towns. I missed her a ton. We stilled talked and the other 2 knew something was off with me. About 2 moths later we all went to Hannah's summerhouse for vacation. We were having fun, getting drunk and all that 19-year old stuff. One night me and Hannah were watching my show together and the time felt right so I asked to kiss her. She told me no and finally told me the truth. Turns out she liked that we flirted but after kissing me she realised it wasn't anything more. Also everyone knew except me. But after all this time I had realised I was in love with this girl. I told her if she could keep all of this to herself and she said yes.
We were all still friends. But I couldn't let go. My mental health began to decent and I started feeling like they would leave me out of stuff to go hang out alone and during October I tried talking some time away to see if they would even talk to me if I didn't. They didn't even say good morning once. I tried again and again. Jacob and Ellie said we all need to talk together. They repeated the same words. Like as if it was rehearsed. I went to "the talk".
Jacob did most of the talking. He talked about boundaries and how after everything between me and Hannah the group hasn't been the same. That after I didn't tell him what happened in our vacation they went to her and forced Hannah to do so. They where all attacking me. I heard lie after lie and all followed up with "we just need some time" and that all of this was cause they loved me.
I have discussed what they accused me of with friends, family and therapists. Although I didn't not believe it at first they all confirmed it was finding little details in my day-to-day behaviour (unrelated to all of the above) and using it to kick me out. They didn't intend of even speaking to me again. Lies feed to everyone by Jacob.
I went away. I don't know if it was for the better. But for a few weeks at first and then months later, I went back to my home town. Their lies became actual blame and I got a message from Ellie saying that we are done (just one month after trying to convince me they needed time and confessing she in particular didn't even notice anything until her boyfriend accused me).
Last time I saw any of them was in December when I gave Hannah her Christmas present. I told her I wasn't trying to get her back and I would continue to keep my distance since my first priority is what she wants and I meant that. I really do love her and would do anything for her to be happy. But I miss her a ton.
It's been 5 months since then. I stopped going to school and kept my distance from anyone related to that life. I have depression and cannot think about anything else. I heard that Jacob still talk shut about me to everyone. I have realised what has happened and have discussed this with multiple common friends who have confirmed this. Jacob is Manipulating the other 2 because of the bad relationship with his parents. He knows Ellie won't do anything with anyone else despite the "open" relationship due to her luck of confidence (so it only works for him). She need him to operate in public and to deal with her extreme anxiety so he takes advantage of that and Hannah follows him everywhere with the excuse of just being a good friend.
There are so many things I couldn't include (this is a hugh post already) about more lies and proof that they where bad for me. But I can't move on. I have seeked medical help but I just cant imagine my life in the future without them. Everything is a reminder of what we've been through. Jacob used to call me his family and when I begged him for our friendship back he didn't even care. Not on my birthday, not on new years... never. I lost all of them.
I'm back now. Not sure why, whether I'm back to continue my studies or to see if I could win them back. If I could have Hannah in my life in sime form. But I'll probably see them tomorrow morning (I randomly walked behind them today, don't think they noticed me).
Please if you have any advice share it. I just want to feel happy again. Even for a second.
TL,DR: The girl I'm in love with stopped talking to me along with my 2 best friends. I can't move on and I'm supposed to face them again in school after not seeing them for months. They all lied to me and nothing seem to help. I have depression and I dont want to feel like this for the rest of my life.

So this is going to be a long story, but a very intriguing one (or so my friends say). Bear with me and if you could offer some advice on what to do please share. I know I'm probably just young and naive but I feel like the pain will never stop. Like I'm going to always be held back by this particular experience.
Also sorry for any grammatical or spelling errors, English isn't my first language.
So all of this begins October of 2022 when I 18 M (at the time) moved to a new city to study film. I was lucky enough to have good grades and be so passionate about this art that it kind of felt incredible to have this new beginning. I rented a small house which I decorated with my collections and all my stuff and ended up loving every second spend in it.
I'm Not very social. Thats just a fact. I've always had my school friends and some people from other activities but none of them really felt like they understood me. No sade to them, I really love them, it's just that I know my hobbies and personality are niece and weird so we don't always see eye to eye. So I wanted to overcome my social anxiety and meet new people.
For the first semester I was all alone. Completely. Spent days upon days without leaving my house if I didn't have school and even didn't have any actual human interaction if not necessary. I didn't realise how much I was hurting myself. The Second semester, someone approached me in school and asked if I could help them with the editing for their final movie, let's call him Jacob 18 M. I already was searching for a group project to join in order to pass the class so this felt like a sweet deal. The group was Jacob and 2 girls, let's call them Ellie 18 F and Hannah 18 F.
With time we started talking about more then just the movie. I was really surprised by how many things we had in common. It was the first time someone I met liked musical theatre or (and this is gonna sound sad, please don't judge me) people didn't want me to leave whenever I approached them. They invited me to things, to their homes and after school and to trips at the beach ect. We were together almost every day. Till late at night or through it. Just the 4 of us. Felt like we could rule the world.
One day i thought Ellie was flirting with me. That was a weird feeling. I'm not very good looking and had a lot of extra weight so that was pretty much the first time but my friends told me that was the case from what I was describing. I mentioned it to Jacob and he told me something I didn't expect. He told me him and Ellie were in an open relationship and were hiding it from everyone except Hannah because of his ex who was in school with us. He also confessed he once had a crush on me and that's why he approached me in the first place. He also saw Ellie flirting with me but was ok with it due to the "rules of their relationship".
I was ok with not having a romantic relationship with Ellie. She would actually become one of the closest friends I've ever had. Or so I thought.
I actually started having a crush on Hannah. She loved some of the movies I loved. Had some of my quirks so I didn't feel ashamed around her and she started watching my favourite tv show with me. During our time together everyone (even her sister and Jacob who found out I liked her) told us that when we were together we could only see each other. As if we had a unique way of communication that nobody else could understand.
I confessed my crush and she told me she felt the same way but that there where 2 problems. First that she gets very anxious about relationships, has only ever been to one and had never kissed anyone. I assured her I wasn't going to pressure anything and I only cared for her and wanted to go on a date sometime. She replied she would like that very much. The second problem she confessed was that she was in love with Jacob for months now but nobody knew. Then everything made sense. The things she did for him and all. How she acted around him. I was surprised I didn't notice it before. She told me she wanted to get over it and proceed to ask to kiss me. We kissed a lot but nothing more that night. She went home after a few hours.
The next day Hannah she felt very distant. We wanted to go to the movies with Ellie but she disappeared all day. Late at night she asked my to go for a walk since we lived near each other. Then she told me she wanted to forget everything and last night was a mistake. That her anxiety has gotten into her and although she really wanted a relationship she couldn't be in one. The next few days we talked again and she said she didn't share any of this with Jacob to have someone in the group I could talk to if I needed help. Ellie was that for her.
It was already summer so we all went to our home towns. I missed her a ton. We stilled talked and the other 2 knew something was off with me. About 2 moths later we all went to Hannah's summerhouse for vacation. We were having fun, getting drunk and all that 19-year old stuff. One night me and Hannah were watching my show together and the time felt right so I asked to kiss her. She told me no and finally told me the truth. Turns out she liked that we flirted but after kissing me she realised it wasn't anything more. Also everyone knew except me. But after all this time I had realised I was in love with this girl. I told her if she could keep all of this to herself and she said yes.
We were all still friends. But I couldn't let go. My mental health began to decent and I started feeling like they would leave me out of stuff to go hang out alone and during October I tried talking some time away to see if they would even talk to me if I didn't. They didn't even say good morning once. I tried again and again. Jacob and Ellie said we all need to talk together. They repeated the same words. Like as if it was rehearsed. I went to "the talk".
Jacob did most of the talking. He talked about boundaries and how after everything between me and Hannah the group hasn't been the same. That after I didn't tell him what happened in our vacation they went to her and forced Hannah to do so. They where all attacking me. I heard lie after lie and all followed up with "we just need some time" and that all of this was cause they loved me.
I have discussed what they accused me of with friends, family and therapists. Although I didn't not believe it at first they all confirmed it was finding little details in my day-to-day behaviour (unrelated to all of the above) and using it to kick me out. They didn't intend of even speaking to me again. Lies feed to everyone by Jacob.
I went away. I don't know if it was for the better. But for a few weeks at first and then months later, I went back to my home town. Their lies became actual blame and I got a message from Ellie saying that we are done (just one month after trying to convince me they needed time and confessing she in particular didn't even notice anything until her boyfriend accused me).
Last time I saw any of them was in December when I gave Hannah her Christmas present. I told her I wasn't trying to get her back and I would continue to keep my distance since my first priority is what she wants and I meant that. I really do love her and would do anything for her to be happy. But I miss her a ton.
It's been 5 months since then. I stopped going to school and kept my distance from anyone related to that life. I have depression and cannot think about anything else. I heard that Jacob still talk shut about me to everyone. I have realised what has happened and have discussed this with multiple common friends who have confirmed this. Jacob is Manipulating the other 2 because of the bad relationship with his parents. He knows Ellie won't do anything with anyone else despite the "open" relationship due to her luck of confidence (so it only works for him). She need him to operate in public and to deal with her extreme anxiety so he takes advantage of that and Hannah follows him everywhere with the excuse of just being a good friend.
There are so many things I couldn't include (this is a hugh post already) about more lies and proof that they where bad for me. But I can't move on. I have seeked medical help but I just cant imagine my life in the future without them. Everything is a reminder of what we've been through. Jacob used to call me his family and when I begged him for our friendship back he didn't even care. Not on my birthday, not on new years... never. I lost all of them.
I'm back now. Not sure why, whether I'm back to continue my studies or to see if I could win them back. If I could have Hannah in my life in sime form. But I'll probably see them tomorrow morning (I randomly walked behind them today, don't think they noticed me).
Please if you have any advice share it. I just want to feel happy again. Even for a second.
TL,DR: The girl I'm in love with stopped talking to me along with my 2 best friends. I can't move on and I'm supposed to face them again in school after not seeing them for months. They all lied to me and nothing seem to help. I have depression and I dont want to feel like this for the rest of my life.

I (19m) am the youngest of four siblings (27F, 22F, 20F), the two older having a different mother, from one of my dad's past marriages. Me and my youmgest sister were born to the same mother, but my parents have been divorced since 2019. My parent's divorce was a result of my dad cheating on my mom.
He ended up dating the woman for 8 years total (the relationship began years before anyone knew about it, so around 2015, and this relationship ended mid 2023). Following this relationship he then dated a woman 1 year older than my oldest sister, to which he then cheated on with his current woman, E (short for entitled).
Regarding my dad's current woman, she has been constantly trying to get involved in all of mine and my sister's lives, one way or another, such as showing uo to our birthday and christmas parties, but the issues being that she was either uninvited, would twist every conversation onto herself or her children, or make a big deal about how she would get really bad headaches and have to be carried to my dad's car to lay down. E constantly tells my dad about how his kids haven't done anything with their lives (I'm the only one not in college/graduated atm, and I'm working a full time job so I can afford to go), meanwhile she has children who dropped out of highschool and have been expelled, multiple times.
Today we had a party celebrating my older two sister's birthday and college graduation respectively. It was us four siblings, 22F's fiancé and 20F's boyfriend, and what we thought would by my dad and E (we don't really invite her, but if my dad is invited she has to go). When those two finally arrived (about 30 minutes late), we were surpised to find out that there was "a few" other people coming. We thought it would be her children, who have shown up for past events such as my birthday, but to our surprise E thought it was a great idea to bring her youngest son, and two people none of my sisters have ever met. One of the two I did recognize as one of my dad's employees at a bar, but the other was also a new face to me. As for the guy, he was just very downright racist and made us all uncomfortable with sexual remarks, and when we asked my dad about it E chimed in and said to 'not take him seriously'.
After we ate our food and played a bit of bags (cornhole), we tried to play a trivia game like we usually do, where we take turns and answer questions on a card, we have a turn system for this game, but none of the random invites nor my dad and E were following it. This combined with the group collectively trying to cause havoc throughout the entire party by looking at the trivia cards and guessing out if turn, and my sisters had enough and wanted to just leave. A couple comments were said by the 'guests', which caused an all out screaming war between my sisters, my dad, and E, where my dad and E were arguing that we had to get used to these people as they were family. I said that they weren't our family so they can leave. (They did end up keaving for a short period) This is where we found out my dad and E had gotten secretly married in March, and they would've announced it sooner (at my birthday party), and had I not been 'selfish' during my party, they would've announced it at the restaurant I chose to eat at (E said it was selfish because she was allergic to cinnamon and I got a cheesecake for dessert that had cinnamon in it so she had to leave). E said that since she was our stepmom now we had to listen and respect her, which is not how that works. She told us we were the ones that were not a part of my dad's family, and we should leave. This is around where I was tokd to leave so I sat in my sister's fiancé's car until my mom came and got me, (my youngest sister and her boyfriend had to leave early so they didn't know about this until I told them).
I don't know much of what was said after I left, but I did see the guests return for a minute, followed by my older sister shoving them right back out the door, to which they did not return.
I feel bad for my sisters. This was their day to celebrate, and not only did it end this badly, but my dad is threatening to cut off all communications with them because of this incident. He said if we return to the building we were celebrating at (which he owns), he will call the cops on us for trespassing. E is threatening to take my oldest sister's dogs because she 'doesn't deserve them', and E is likely now uninvited from my sister's wedding. I don't know what to do.
TL;DR - my sisters' combined graduation and birthday party is cut short because my dad got secretly married to an entitled woman, who now wants us cut off from 'her' family.

So this is kind of ongoing??
Hi everyone I'm just going to make this the shortest I can do it so if anyone wants me to clarify I will.
My dad and I are both only siblings. My mom is not. Both of them turn sixty this year. (My dad had his birthday in January) My mom's is in July.
So my maternal uncle on his own is usually a kind and loving man who is always lovely, but this, and his partner (and their roommate)'s intervention is making me think that they don't really value us.
Ok, sounds stupid, but basically, last July when my mum turned 59 I asked my dad if we could ask to use my Uncle and partner and roommate's house for a surprise party (a place they use to hold most 'family' occasions), he liked it we asked to use their house in October. They accepted. (Let me be clear, I have always understood that it was their house and if they said no, of course I would've been a little upset, but I would've moved on) But no, they gave us the number of 46 people.
I clarified this number with the two of them (uncle and partner) that November by giving them my idea of a guest list, and they weren't fazed as our idea was a little under the max but counting myself, my mom, my dad, my uncle, his partner and his roommate it would make 41 people. They later backtracked to 20 people in January, and blamed us for the original number of 46 people. Then after talking to my uncle's stepdaughter (partner's daughter) (edit:she's invited. And my uncle or his partner told her before the invitations went out) I realised that my uncle's partner had been telling other people that the maximum was 30 people (edit: after my uncle's stepdaughter told me specifically that her mom said the max was 30 people. This is verbatim)
Now we're in a massive mess as even though my uncle's house as a location has been cancelled. We've found another place, but they're mad at us for going over the original number they said they'd given us.
Now I feel really stupid for even asking to use my uncle's house in the first place.
TL;DR: My dad and I asked to use my uncle's house for a birthday party when they use it for almost every other occasion regarding his partner and roommate's families. They accepted, backtracked a couple of months later, and now we're in a he-said she-said situation and my mom is blissfully unaware of what's going on.

The title should say enough as TL;DR. The longer story is that my bf and I, as well as his friends attended a smaller, more east asian media oriented convention months ago, where he and I cosplayed as Misa and Light a little last minute, but still enjoyed ourselves. Now, the bigger variant would be next month, and my bf (M22) wanted to attend again. My bf and I have talked about this for months, and even when he was over at my birthday, we talked about cosplaying as something I really liked again, just as a way to make it an enjoyable experience for both parties (he's more into the convention thing, and I am into fashion).
So, a few days ago I brought up we should go in june again, to my bf, since nobody at home was really against it and said it'd be fun (I live with my mom and sister, as well as her kid—my nephew). That same day I showed my mom and sister a couple of outfits that Tifa wears, which they said is actually cool, especially my sister (who liked her cowboy one most) cos she plays the games too. Fast forward, my bf gets two tickets, so I'm showing my mom again; hey, I have tickets now, this is what we want to go as. She suddenly starts saying the outfit is too slutty, etc. i said I'd wear safety shorts and my pleated skirt would be longer anyway, as well as the crop top, so she wouldn't have to worry about it, especially because in real life I wear short stuff too. She calls me names, says me going one time was enough, keeps going at it, and I say "okay then I won't go". She keeps this whole thing up, so I just decide to go to my room and close myself up, because I know arguing against her will leave me outside with nothing for hours again (speaking from experience), and I just can't be bothered.
I do the same today, because I just don't understand her problem, she says I shouldn't have allowed my bf to buy tickets before I got consent over what to wear. Which, fair, because I'm middle eastern and that put me in the luck of needing consent for everything, which is where I think I'm the asshole, as well as for ignoring her. But at the same time, I feel like it's completely reasonable I got upset over this too?
I don't party, go out, not even with friends, on dates I constantly text my mom so she knows I am not "doing anything wrong" (as well as me trying to get home early always, and 5 pm already gets her screaming off of her lungs that it's late), I get good grades and only occpuy myself with work and school. I've had recitals for my own music, she's never attended one. At the same time, she polices my body and what I do, and even though I live under her roof, which makes me TA in this situation in her opinion, wouldn't I still be allowed some? Liberty? I feel like a 15 year old asshole even crying about this idk... AITA?
TLDR; Mom won't let me (f21) cosplay as Tifa for a convention because she thinks it's too slutty and I should've told her I wanted to look "like a whore" before letting my boyfriend (m22) buy tickets.

I still have a feeling this beef isn’t fully over and if it’s true that Kendrick is planning an album then maybe we could be expecting it for this date, since it is 2Pac’s birthday.
But what I’m really thinking is Drake would surely want to crash the party like Kendrick did to him. He obviously speculated about Kendrick dropping an album hence why he titled his song HP6 and he’s probably thinking the same thing as us in terms of the release date. But for Kendrick to basically show his hand by revealing when he’s gonna drop his album, he surely would think BBL will want to plan payback for MTG (which was also pre planned).
I have a feeling there is still an intense game of chess going on right now and we might be in the Cold War phase if both Dot and BBL are dropping this summer. It just doesn’t feel like this will be let go any time soon.
TL;DR: If Kendrick is planning to drop on 6/16, is Drake going to crash the party? Or is Kendrick baiting him to do that?

Hey everyone,
Me (27F) and my boyfriend (28M) have been together for over a year. Things were going great until about 1.5 months ago. He moved abroad a couple of months back, so we've been trying to make the long-distance thing work. But then, he started acting all strange about 1.5 months ago. He said he was feeling really down and stressed because he couldn't find a place to live in his new city and work was just not going so great for him. I told him I was there for him, but he just acted distant and stopped talking to me. I told him I need to talk about him treating me like a stranger (after 3 days or him treating me this way) and it just made him super angry. He said he shared something with me (that he was upset), and I didn't handle it as he had expected me to. After that, total radio silence. He wouldn't reply to my messages or take my calls, even though he was active on social media. I sent him a break up message and just unfollowed him on everything (no response from him).
Then, after almost 3 weeks, he sends me this super long text, explaining his stress and saying he doesn't want to break up. But honestly, it was a bit all over the place. I said I’d rather respond over a call and he said sure, but he never called. After waiting for what felt like forever (5 days), I replied to his text. And then he snapped at me, saying it's not a good time because his dog is sick and literally dying and he just can’t do it rn. He said he'd get back to me when things settle down. And said to me I know I can't keep not replying to you but I need some time and I think we need a break. My life is a mess at the moment, need to get everything straight, including us. But I'm just sad right now and I don't think I can do this. I'll call you when I can or at least when things are better, till then let's just take a break from us. It's been 10 days, and nothing.
His birthday came during this “break”, and I struggled with whether to send him a message or not. I ended up sending a short one, but got no response. I can't help but check his insta, even though it's private. It drives me crazy seeing his activity. And this morning, when I noticed his post count went up, it just set me off. So, I sent him a message saying I can't just wait around forever for him get back to me (Today was the 10th day since he said “I’ll call you when I can or at least when things are better”)
But he hasn't replied to my last texts, and honestly, I'm not even sure if I meant what I said. I still hope to hear from him in my heart. Why doesn't he just block me or something? I sent him so many messages in these past 6 weeks, and got almost no replies, I feel so fkn bad. I feel like a beggar. My self esteem has been really hurt.
TL;DR:
Boyfriend of over a year ghosted me, saying he is stressed out and sad, and has been giving me the silent treatment for almost 6 weeks now.

So for background, my partner had to go back to his home country for citizenship reasons & we decided I'd go too. We've been married a year now. He went two months before me, to set everything up. I'd just finished school for the year and didn't want to waste a semester's fees on two months, so I was looking for a job during that time. Couldn't find one due to the time constraints, so was doing odd jobs and taking short courses. Basically, I had almost no money and didn't want to touch my savings until I'd moved. I'd been saving for the move for a year already and had never lived alone before, so wanted to be safe.
My partner found out about a concert for a band we both liked happening where he was, scheduled for after I'd moved. Problem was: concert tickets are expensive and I was already living off instant ramen. Couldn't afford a ticket without being incredibly irresponsible about it.
However, because it was close to my partner's birthday, his mother bought him a ticket as a present. By the time I'd moved to the new country and sorted out my expenses, the tickets were all sold out. I could've been able to afford one if they were still selling by then, but no chance.
I've also befriended my partner's group of childhood friends who are also all going to this concert, and it was a bit awkward when they found out I couldn't go. I did talk to my partner about how I was disappointed, but I didn't say too much because I didn't want him to feel bad. Literally everyone I know in this country is going to this thing, while I stay home because I had no money a few months ago.
Selfishly, I wish he'd sell his ticket and not go. I know that the concert was free for him & we don't lose anything by him going, but I feel irrationally betrayed by it. I put my studies on hold and moved because he had to, and while I'm okay with doing that, I'm frustrated that I feel like I'm stuck missing out on things because he has a support network here and I don't.
Right now, I feel like I don't want him to even acknowledge the concert around me. I keep thinking that he should have tried to pay for me to get a ticket, go halves on the cost or something. He didn't want to do that when I originally brought it up, which felt fair-ish because he was also broke then. It was just bad timing and he got lucky.
There'll be other stuff we can do together in the future, but there's also going to be opportunities he gets that I miss out on. I don't want to feel like a jealous jerk whenever that happens. But, I don't know how to approach the topic without my partner getting defensive and I'm worried this is going to build resentment in future if I don't talk to him about it.
TL;DR, my partner got an opportunity I wanted and I'm upset about it because it feels unfair, but don't want to hurt his feelings or ruin his own happiness over it. How do I navigate dealing with my partner having better opportunities than me without getting bitter?

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SIEM T - Enigmatic (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 135, 6:12, MP3 15.23 Mb
SIEM T - Enigmatic concept (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 136, 6:11, MP3 15.15 Mb
SIEM T - Enigmatic dream (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 133, 6:19, MP3 15.49 Mb
SNOOKO - Funny Beet (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 130, 5:57, MP3 14.69 Mb
SNOOKO - Paco Di Bongo (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 128, 5:02, MP3 12.50 Mb
STRØBE - Dreamscape (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 80, 2:41, MP3 6.58 Mb
S_Zer0, SAKKO - Man of the Year (Club Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 125, 3:45, MP3 9.60 Mb
Santiago Krenz - Computer System (Original Mix) / Key G, BPM 142, 5:25, MP3 13.05 Mb
Santiago Krenz - Oxigeno (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 150, 6:50, MP3 16.45 Mb
Sarah Berg - Sunset Dance (Original Mix) / Key C, BPM 118, 2:15, MP3 5.84 Mb
Sascha Dive - Time for a change (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 123, 6:15, MP3 15.32 Mb
Schiela - ALL NIGHT, BABY! (Benjamin Fröhlich Remix) / Key Am, BPM 122, 5:15, MP3 12.83 Mb
Schillist, Kxne, Daniel Best - Life Be Like (feat. KXNE) (Extended Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 124, 3:52, MP3 9.64 Mb
Schindergrimm - After the Silent (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 132, 7:16, MP3 17.59 Mb
Schindergrimm - Lost in Time (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 138, 6:46, MP3 16.36 Mb
Schindergrimm - Missing Link (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 133, 8:16, MP3 19.95 Mb
Sean Harris (UK) - Matter (Extended Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 128, 5:39, MP3 13.91 Mb
Sean Harris (UK) - Matter (Radio Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 128, 3:01, MP3 7.61 Mb
Sean Tyas - Lift (Chris Voro & Ode ReChill) / Key Dm, BPM 115, 6:18, MP3 15.40 Mb
Sebastiaan Hooft - Magazine (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 135, 6:42, MP3 16.44 Mb
Sebastiaan Hooft - Void (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 140, 2:45, MP3 6.72 Mb
Sebastian Darez - M87 (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 124, 6:50, MP3 16.75 Mb
Sebastian Darez - The Winter Is Coming (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 125, 6:55, MP3 16.94 Mb
Sebastian Davidson - Safe and Sound (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 100, 3:34, MP3 8.72 Mb
Segler - Kesäyöt (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 140, 6:26, MP3 15.81 Mb
Self Deception - Cat's Dreams (Original mix) / Key Fm, BPM 113, 4:02, MP3 10.14 Mb
Self Deception - Purple Fields (Original mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 110, 4:27, MP3 11.03 Mb
Selomi - Igwe (Tomahawk Bang Remix) / Key Fm, BPM 122, 6:37, MP3 16.38 Mb
Senbei, MGHN - Saji (feat. MGHN) (Gavrosh Remix) / Key Em, BPM 127, 3:18, MP3 8.39 Mb
Sentin, Wout Vantieghem - A Wall Of Glass (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 124, 6:17, MP3 15.43 Mb
Sergii Petrenko - Tropical Breeze (Format Groove Remix) / Key Gm, BPM 128, 6:30, MP3 15.72 Mb
Sergii Petrenko - Tropical Breeze (Techno Remix) / Key Gm, BPM 135, 6:10, MP3 14.91 Mb
Sevdavision - For Now (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 129, 5:24, MP3 13.09 Mb
Sevdavision - OK (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 106, 3:17, MP3 8.02 Mb
Sevdavision - Osoti (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 106, 2:54, MP3 7.08 Mb
Sevdavision - Pazar (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 91, 5:07, MP3 12.41 Mb
Sevdavision - The Old Goes (Original Mix) / Key B, BPM 100, 2:39, MP3 6.51 Mb
Sevdavision - Will We Meet Again (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 96, 5:40, MP3 13.75 Mb
Sharapov - Pictures (Instrumental Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 118, 5:17, MP3 12.91 Mb
Sharapov - Pictures (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 118, 5:17, MP3 12.92 Mb
Shelby Zyxx - Love Love (Original Mix) / Key B, BPM 145, 2:29, MP3 6.14 Mb
Shokh - FPM (Edit) / Key B, BPM 130, 5:22, MP3 13.17 Mb
Shokh - Pepper (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 130, 5:16, MP3 12.91 Mb
Shokh - Pur (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 138, 7:16, MP3 17.70 Mb
Shokh - Tonka (Original Mix) / Key Bb, BPM 125, 5:31, MP3 13.53 Mb
Shunus - Where's the Party At? (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 130, 5:18, MP3 12.95 Mb
Sillaz - The Pill (Extended) / Key Cm, BPM 131, 1:32, MP3 4.05 Mb
Silvertone (US) - Life's a B!tch (Extended Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 128, 5:34, MP3 13.92 Mb
Silvertone (US) - Out My Mind (Extended Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 128, 4:38, MP3 11.67 Mb
Simon Pagliari - Kiss Like This (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 130, 5:43, MP3 13.87 Mb
Simon Pagliari - Kiss Like This (Radio Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 130, 3:43, MP3 9.06 Mb
Singular Anomalies - I'll Tell You Tomorrow (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 137, 5:43, MP3 14.06 Mb
Singular Anomalies - Implant (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 137, 5:43, MP3 14.06 Mb
Singular Anomalies - Latent Heat (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 136, 5:46, MP3 14.16 Mb
Sinkix - Mermaids Of Osiris (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 121, 7:41, MP3 18.62 Mb
Sinkix - Mount Shipton (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 122, 7:09, MP3 17.34 Mb
Sir Soundbender - 1 4 Da Money (Miggedy's Full Count Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 126, 8:10, MP3 19.84 Mb
Siskin - Fly Away (Hel:sløwed Extended Remix) / Key Em, BPM 124, 5:47, MP3 14.15 Mb
Skatman - Unchained (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 125, 5:56, MP3 14.37 Mb
Skurilla - Roll (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 140, 6:42, MP3 16.44 Mb
Slash Eleven - Sun God (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 130, 4:09, MP3 10.33 Mb
SleepCycle - Reflection (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 120, 3:28, MP3 8.59 Mb
Slygui - Devin (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 130, 7:58, MP3 19.68 Mb
Smilla - Bad Lost (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 139, 6:55, MP3 16.98 Mb
Soalex - Music Never Done (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 122, 3:17, MP3 8.75 Mb
Social Assassins - Restrain this (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 144, 5:47, MP3 14.21 Mb
Sofus Wiene - After The Beep (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 125, 2:58, MP3 7.32 Mb
Sofus Wiene - Xtasy (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 125, 3:23, MP3 8.30 Mb
Solc - Where Am I (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 128, 6:04, MP3 15.25 Mb
Solma - Stomatal Conductance (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 136, 6:12, MP3 15.16 Mb
Solma - Sugar Snake (Original Mix) / Key G, BPM 138, 6:20, MP3 15.50 Mb
Solntsev - Watch Me Dancing All the Time (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 127, 6:26, MP3 15.69 Mb
Something Else DR - Abusadora (Extended) / Key Fm, BPM 126, 4:08, MP3 10.28 Mb
Something Else DR - Abusadora (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 126, 2:40, MP3 6.78 Mb
Sonic Flash - Fly Away (Remix) / Key Dm, BPM 140, 4:56, MP3 12.14 Mb
Sonny Fodera, Blythe - Mind Still (feat. blythe) (Tita Lau Extended Remix) / Key Bm, BPM 130, 4:59, MP3 12.01 Mb
Sophie Nixdorf - Kiko (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 130, 6:35, MP3 15.88 Mb
Soul& - Ain't No Beauty (Original Mix) / Key G, BPM 116, 4:27, MP3 11.03 Mb
Soul& - All The Doors Are Open (Original Mix) / Key A, BPM 95, 6:08, MP3 15.10 Mb
Soul& - Someday We Will Win (Original Mix) / Key G, BPM 102, 5:31, MP3 13.62 Mb
Soul& - The Sailor (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 129, 3:23, MP3 8.47 Mb
Soul& - Those Blue Eyes (Mata Biru) (Original Mix) / Key G, BPM 112, 3:39, MP3 9.14 Mb
Soul& - War (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 95, 4:36, MP3 11.42 Mb
Spaces Between - LaVey (Original Mix) / Key D, BPM 120, 5:12, MP3 12.58 Mb
Spaces Between - Lineside (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 141, 4:09, MP3 10.08 Mb
Spaces Between - Summer 94 (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 165, 3:07, MP3 7.59 Mb
Spaces Between - Wilgefortis (Original Mix) / Key G, BPM 122, 3:04, MP3 7.46 Mb
Speedman, Techno Cats, Hyper Hamster - Dirty Talk (Extended Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 148, 3:47, MP3 9.37 Mb
Speedman, Techno Cats, Hyper Hamster - Dirty Talk (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 148, 2:25, MP3 6.10 Mb
Spektrx - Chaoswave (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 133, 6:32, MP3 15.90 Mb
Spektrx - Confusion (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 131, 6:53, MP3 16.72 Mb
Spektrx - Particulas (Original Mix) / Key C, BPM 133, 7:16, MP3 17.63 Mb
Spring Rolls - Architecture Conceptuelle (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 130, 5:55, MP3 14.58 Mb
Spring Rolls - Etude Preliminaire (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 121, 2:59, MP3 7.53 Mb
Spring Rolls - L'Invitation (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 135, 5:21, MP3 13.21 Mb
Spring Rolls - La Porte Derobee (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 131, 7:05, MP3 17.38 Mb
Spring Rolls - Mixture Melodique (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 134, 6:13, MP3 15.28 Mb
Spring Rolls - Une Balade Sournoise (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 128, 6:45, MP3 16.58 Mb
Spring Rolls - Vibration Harcelante (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 134, 6:27, MP3 15.85 Mb
Spring Rolls - Violence Percussive (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 134, 5:44, MP3 14.14 Mb
Squeeze DJ, Vito Raisi - Analog Aura Adventure (Explorer Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 126, 6:38, MP3 16.16 Mb
Squeeze DJ, Vito Raisi - Analog Aura Adventure (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 126, 6:51, MP3 16.70 Mb
Stagz Jazz, Da Vynalist - Soft Landing (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 116, 6:54, MP3 16.91 Mb
Stefre Roland - Close Your Eyes (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 120, 3:18, MP3 8.13 Mb
Step2Sun - Dance With Me (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 130, 7:13, MP3 17.51 Mb
Step2Sun - Nice, Very Nice (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 128, 7:07, MP3 17.24 Mb
Steven Liquid - Sunset Coast (Sunny Island Freaks Remix) / Key Abm, BPM 124, 6:01, MP3 14.74 Mb
Stoked - It's the Groove (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 132, 6:02, MP3 14.60 Mb
Stoned Chicken - Mood Developer (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 126, 6:10, MP3 14.84 Mb
Store P - Det Kunne Begynt Å Brenne (Boge Remix) / Key Abm, BPM 127, 4:13, MP3 10.37 Mb
Subcisco - Reset (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 124, 3:25, MP3 8.40 Mb
Sunlounger, Betafish - Beachwalk (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 160, 3:22, MP3 8.37 Mb
Supaderb - The Days (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 126, 5:36, MP3 13.59 Mb
Super-Secret - Cappuccino (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 126, 5:36, MP3 13.60 Mb
Super-Secret - FrenchDarkProg (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 126, 6:06, MP3 14.81 Mb
Super-Secret - Mister Techno Cox (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 126, 6:06, MP3 14.81 Mb
Svarog - Psalm (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 131, 6:07, MP3 14.80 Mb
Sven Neawolf - In meinen Gedanken (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 160, 3:57, MP3 9.66 Mb
Sven Nielsen - You (Andy Lizard Pres. LZD Melodia Remix) / Key Gm, BPM 124, 6:43, MP3 16.50 Mb
Sven Nielsen - You (Andy Lizard Pres. LZD Melodia Vocal Intro Edit) / Key Gm, BPM 124, 6:46, MP3 16.61 Mb
Sven Vath, Gregor Tresher - Flashback (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 135, 7:14, MP3 17.85 Mb
Sven Wegner - Rollercoast (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 120, 5:17, MP3 12.82 Mb
Swomp - Balance (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 145, 2:59, MP3 7.43 Mb
Sym Bioz - Celestial (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 132, 6:36, MP3 16.18 Mb
Sym Bioz - Cerebral (Original Mix) / Key A, BPM 132, 6:42, MP3 16.40 Mb
Sym Bioz - Disinhibition (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 132, 6:40, MP3 16.32 Mb
Sym Bioz - Latency (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 132, 6:38, MP3 16.25 Mb
Sym Bioz - Megahertz (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 132, 6:40, MP3 16.32 Mb
Sym Bioz - Ultra (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 132, 6:38, MP3 16.25 Mb
T.Markakis - 1979 (Original Mix) / Key D, BPM 123, 5:20, MP3 13.06 Mb
T.Markakis - Deeper Thoughts (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 123, 7:09, MP3 17.44 Mb
THE.PROVIDER - Resonate (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 135, 6:12, MP3 15.13 Mb
TRFN - Plain Jane (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 145, 2:16, MP3 5.98 Mb
TURN X - Nine Is God (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 123, 6:06, MP3 14.92 Mb
Takairo Oishi - Beyond the Odd Grid (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 138, 6:44, MP3 16.37 Mb
That Kid Chris - Tonight (Apache Tribal Mix (Remastered)) / Key A, BPM 134, 9:03, MP3 21.87 Mb
That Kid Chris, DJ Mada - That's It! (Hyperdrive Mix (Remastered)) / Key Am, BPM 134, 8:22, MP3 20.23 Mb
The Bestseller - Moments (Extended Mix) / Key Am, BPM 114, 3:52, MP3 9.53 Mb
The Bossline - Take It (Ibiza Chill Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 114, 2:36, MP3 6.52 Mb
The Dudes [COL] - Colera (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 130, 6:39, MP3 16.12 Mb
The Dudes [COL] - La Libertad (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 126, 6:13, MP3 15.08 Mb
The Notwist, What Are People For? - illusions (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 159, 4:47, MP3 11.77 Mb
The Phantom (CR) - Do You Remember Love (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 132, 7:26, MP3 17.94 Mb
The Phantom (CR) - Tribu (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 128, 5:53, MP3 14.23 Mb
The Populists - Step Inside (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 127, 6:53, MP3 16.84 Mb
The Regular Guy - Everlasting Love (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 124, 6:47, MP3 16.51 Mb
The Sleeper, Lju Je - Pod Room (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 120, 8:23, MP3 20.29 Mb
Theodor Nabuurs - Feels Like High (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 125, 4:58, MP3 12.26 Mb
Thomas Baumhauer - Juno (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 125, 5:22, MP3 13.10 Mb
Thorkell Máni, 2 HANDS - Yellow Jacket Boys (Addi Stefansson Remix) / Key Em, BPM 128, 5:44, MP3 14.11 Mb
Thorkell Máni, 2 HANDS - Yellow Jacket Boys (G.Roy Remix) / Key Fm, BPM 126, 6:10, MP3 15.15 Mb
Thorkell Máni, 2 HANDS - Yellow Jacket Boys (SKYN Remix) / Key Gm, BPM 94, 6:02, MP3 14.83 Mb
Tier Ra Nichi - Beats & Rhythm (Original Version) / Key Fm, BPM 120, 7:28, MP3 18.15 Mb
Tier Ra Nichi - Deeper, Let's Go (Let's Go Deeper Voxstrumental) / Key Gm, BPM 125, 5:38, MP3 13.75 Mb
Tier Ra Nichi - Lab In The Am (The Late Night Operation Imprint) / Key F, BPM 123, 6:46, MP3 16.48 Mb
Tier Ra Nichi - Mars On Tap (New Direction Instrumental Imprint) / Key Fm, BPM 125, 6:16, MP3 15.28 Mb
Tijn Driessen - In Bloei (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 118, 5:48, MP3 14.33 Mb
Tim Baresko, RAYZIR, Daniel Orpi - Takin' Over (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 132, 5:25, MP3 13.19 Mb
Tim Olsson - Is It Really Love (Original Mix) / Key G, BPM 114, 2:01, MP3 5.40 Mb
Timothy Allen - Rapture (Extended Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 135, 5:40, MP3 13.75 Mb
Tokyo Cartel - Theme From Tokyo (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 122, 4:45, MP3 11.70 Mb
Tokyo T, Jay Cara - Do It Like Me (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 128, 6:30, MP3 15.77 Mb
Tokyo T, Jay Cara - Tranquilao (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 128, 6:38, MP3 16.07 Mb
Tomas Bisquierra - Beatz Up (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 128, 6:04, MP3 14.93 Mb
Tommy Crash - Don't Sleep (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 125, 4:40, MP3 11.34 Mb
Tommy Crash - Don't Tell Me Your Name (Original Mix) / Key C, BPM 126, 5:28, MP3 13.23 Mb
Tommy Crash - She Bad (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 127, 5:45, MP3 13.94 Mb
Tony Deledda - Everybody (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 120, 5:46, MP3 13.94 Mb
Tony Deledda - Something Intense (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 125, 6:43, MP3 16.23 Mb
Tony Ess - Just a Packet of Crisps (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 140, 5:29, MP3 13.32 Mb
Tony Postigo - Take It Over (Extended Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 124, 6:29, MP3 15.89 Mb
Tooloud - I Still Think About You (Original Mix) / Key D, BPM 125, 2:51, MP3 6.91 Mb
Toru S., Benign Polypupu - A Day Before My Birthday (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 124, 5:56, MP3 14.54 Mb
Tough Art - Caribean Swag (Extended Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 129, 6:18, MP3 15.42 Mb
Tough Art - Ghetto (Extended Mix) / Key Em, BPM 128, 5:06, MP3 12.54 Mb
Traumer - Lemerci (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 128, 6:25, MP3 15.64 Mb
Traumer - Rodage (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 127, 6:50, MP3 16.64 Mb
Tree Threes - Change with Me (Original Mix) / Key E, BPM 121, 5:56, MP3 14.32 Mb
Tree Threes - Stone Turned (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 124, 6:07, MP3 14.79 Mb
Treibsand - Muchacho (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 128, 5:46, MP3 14.20 Mb
Tren - Closing Loop (Original Mix) / Key F#, BPM 118, 4:45, MP3 11.66 Mb
Tren - Essays in Idleness (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 124, 4:43, MP3 11.57 Mb
Tren - Tensor (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 124, 5:45, MP3 14.05 Mb
Trentemøller - A Different Light (Original Mix) / Key D, BPM 130, 5:50, MP3 14.22 Mb
Tripolism - Good Times (Extended Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 122, 6:21, MP3 15.38 Mb
Truncate - Remember (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 138, 5:08, MP3 12.64 Mb
Truncate - Remember (V2) / Key Gm, BPM 142, 4:46, MP3 11.78 Mb
Truncate - That Chord Again (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 142, 4:35, MP3 11.32 Mb
Tueba - Last Forever (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 128, 2:23, MP3 5.90 Mb
Tumbian - Kulya (HUGEhands Remix) / Key Abm, BPM 125, 6:20, MP3 15.41 Mb
Tumbian - Kulya (Leeman Brothers Remix) / Key Cm, BPM 124, 5:54, MP3 14.37 Mb
Tumbian - Kulya (Original Mix) / Key Ab, BPM 126, 5:08, MP3 12.53 Mb
Twin Scream - Que Soy (Extended Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 126, 3:57, MP3 9.74 Mb
Twin Scream - Que Soy (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 126, 2:58, MP3 7.40 Mb
Tydra - Touchdown (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 130, 4:28, MP3 11.06 Mb
UMIIN - Fraction (Das Ton Remix) / Key Cm, BPM 115, 5:17, MP3 12.92 Mb
UMIIN - Fraction (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 108, 5:29, MP3 13.40 Mb
Uncertain - Close (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 143, 4:29, MP3 10.83 Mb
Uncertain - Different (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 140, 5:07, MP3 12.36 Mb
Uncertain - Donna (Mark Broom Remix) / Key Gm, BPM 143, 4:02, MP3 9.74 Mb
Uncertain - Donna (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 143, 4:32, MP3 10.96 Mb
Uncertain - Extreme (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 141, 4:06, MP3 9.89 Mb
Uncertain - Physical (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 141, 4:20, MP3 10.46 Mb
VDMV, Then Ruloks - Trust (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 140, 6:23, MP3 15.58 Mb
VE/RA - All Night (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 93, 5:14, MP3 12.84 Mb
VNDM - Flash (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 135, 6:03, MP3 14.76 Mb
VNDM - Look at Me (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 131, 4:48, MP3 11.76 Mb
Valentino Favetta - Shake That (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 125, 3:35, MP3 8.81 Mb
Valjus - Luxury Vacation (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 120, 5:36, MP3 13.70 Mb
Vallilo - Get Money (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 129, 5:17, MP3 13.10 Mb
Vandermann - Lifeline (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 132, 4:33, MP3 11.18 Mb
Vanillaz - Lets Get Lost (Freudenthal Remix) (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 124, 7:05, MP3 17.30 Mb
Vanstone - Close to Me (Club Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 125, 5:19, MP3 13.36 Mb
Victor Moreno - Paradise (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 124, 7:14, MP3 17.54 Mb
Vier Equis - Mentor (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 120, 8:40, MP3 21.14 Mb
Villano - Back to the Oldschool (Extended Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 128, 5:03, MP3 12.17 Mb
Villano - Back to the Oldschool (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 128, 4:16, MP3 10.31 Mb
Vinback, JUNAR, Madaë - Everything (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 150, 3:00, MP3 7.69 Mb
Vincentsnap - N'oublie Pas (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 124, 8:48, MP3 21.38 Mb
Vinsent D. Vanitas - Splatter Spread (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 145, 5:23, MP3 13.36 Mb
Visage Music, Ragie Ban - Time After Time (Extended Mix) / Key Em, BPM 124, 5:29, MP3 13.43 Mb
Vitorino - Alchemy (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 141, 5:02, MP3 12.70 Mb
Vitorino - Dark Tape (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 146, 4:56, MP3 12.45 Mb
Vitorino - Isolate (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 147, 4:51, MP3 12.24 Mb
Vitorino - Red (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 144, 4:56, MP3 12.45 Mb
Vitorino - Survive (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 140, 5:02, MP3 12.68 Mb
Vitorino - Time Machine (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 146, 5:22, MP3 13.50 Mb
Vittorio Brena - Rimini By Night (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 126, 5:41, MP3 13.73 Mb
Vittorio Brena - Start (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 126, 6:20, MP3 15.29 Mb
Vivaro, BLOTE - Penthouse (Extended) / Key Cm, BPM 126, 3:49, MP3 9.54 Mb
Vivienne WU - Rave All Night (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 138, 6:02, MP3 14.67 Mb
Vivienne WU - You Forgot Who I Am (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 140, 5:36, MP3 13.64 Mb
Volodia Rizak - Shaker (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 130, 6:02, MP3 15.04 Mb
Voost - Drums (Extended Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 128, 5:38, MP3 13.99 Mb
Vortex - Auto Erotica (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 127, 7:27, MP3 18.05 Mb
Vortex - Garuda (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 128, 7:38, MP3 18.51 Mb
Vortex - Pressed (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 122, 7:28, MP3 18.09 Mb
Vortex - Salt (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 126, 5:27, MP3 13.25 Mb
Vortex - Shard (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 128, 7:16, MP3 17.61 Mb
Vortex - The Fly (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 127, 6:34, MP3 15.94 Mb
WONGA, Sohowt - Enter The Rave (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 138, 5:28, MP3 13.40 Mb
Wally Lopez, German Brigante, Sarah Carter - Touch (German Brigante Extended Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 123, 5:38, MP3 13.60 Mb
Wally Lopez, German Brigante, Sarah Carter - Touch (German Brigante Instrumental) / Key Ebm, BPM 123, 5:38, MP3 13.60 Mb
Wally Lopez, German Brigante, Sarah Carter - Touch (German Brigante Remix) / Key Ebm, BPM 123, 2:57, MP3 7.16 Mb
What Are People For? - criminals r snoozing (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 115, 4:48, MP3 11.82 Mb
Whirl, Engelbert - Petrichor (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 120, 5:28, MP3 13.22 Mb
Whirl, Pentia, Engelbert - ADSR (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 124, 6:20, MP3 15.29 Mb
Whirl, Pentia, Engelbert - ADSR (Those Shadows Remix) / Key Dbm, BPM 123, 5:58, MP3 14.42 Mb
Whitesquare - Ephemeral Eyes (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 127, 6:54, MP3 16.67 Mb
Whitesquare - XPR (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 124, 6:33, MP3 15.83 Mb
Will Møller - Unaffected (Original Mix) / Key D, BPM 126, 3:05, MP3 7.60 Mb
Wlack - Claps (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 137, 5:40, MP3 13.87 Mb
Wlack - Loverdose (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 136, 5:36, MP3 13.73 Mb
Wlack - Perc Beep (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 137, 5:12, MP3 12.75 Mb
Wlack - Time (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 137, 5:43, MP3 14.01 Mb
WolmeR - Chrono Synthesis (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 132, 4:38, MP3 11.39 Mb
WolmeR - Nebula (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 133, 5:12, MP3 12.74 Mb
Womp-Life - Pegasus (Club Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 125, 5:38, MP3 14.02 Mb
Womp-Life - Pegasus (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 125, 7:01, MP3 17.32 Mb
X-Statik - Rapture (Edit) / Key Em, BPM 134, 4:06, MP3 10.16 Mb
XAAV - Mind Connection (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 124, 5:14, MP3 12.98 Mb
XAAV - Take It Back (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 127, 5:02, MP3 12.45 Mb
XENEZE - I Can't Let You Go (Original Mix) / Key D, BPM 105, 3:12, MP3 7.79 Mb
Xerxes-k, Isse Maraà - Bound to Break feat. Xerxes-K (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 125, 7:08, MP3 17.35 Mb
Ximena, Ali X, Pvlomo - Pastillitas (Ali X Remix) / Key Gm, BPM 125, 6:59, MP3 17.08 Mb
Ximena, Ali X, Pvlomo - Pastillitas (BadWolf Remix) / Key Em, BPM 120, 5:59, MP3 14.70 Mb
Ximena, Ali X, Pvlomo - Pastillitas (Phunkadelica Mitsubishi Mix) / Key Em, BPM 125, 5:36, MP3 13.79 Mb
Ximena, Ali X, Pvlomo - Pastillitas (Shorter Version) / Key Em, BPM 120, 6:43, MP3 16.44 Mb
Ximena, Ali X, Pvlomo - Pastillitas (TH3OS Remix) / Key Fm, BPM 132, 4:40, MP3 11.54 Mb
Xrolac - Inhuman (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 128, 10:02, MP3 24.27 Mb
Xrolac - Xrolac (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 136, 7:11, MP3 17.43 Mb
YAAS - Where Have You Been (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 125, 3:15, MP3 7.96 Mb
Yan Cook - Freak Show (Original Mix) / Key F#, BPM 128, 5:42, MP3 13.71 Mb
Yan Cook - Loophole (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 129, 6:20, MP3 15.26 Mb
Yan Cook - Quatro (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 129, 6:09, MP3 14.80 Mb
Yan Cook - Rose (Original Mix) / Key Ebm, BPM 130, 6:35, MP3 15.83 Mb
Yanamaste - 8 Tone (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 145, 4:53, MP3 11.78 Mb
Yanamaste - All night (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 145, 5:20, MP3 12.84 Mb
Yanamaste - Dance (Original Mix) / Key Em, BPM 140, 5:03, MP3 12.16 Mb
Yanamaste - Trojan (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 145, 5:00, MP3 12.05 Mb
Yannick Weineck - Mandelbrot (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 141, 5:00, MP3 12.14 Mb
YolcuBeats - Et si tu n'existais pas (Original Mix) / Key Dm, BPM 95, 3:27, MP3 8.67 Mb
Yooniq - Come & Get It (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 126, 3:58, MP3 9.71 Mb
You Man - Birdcage (Original Mix) / Key E, BPM 109, 5:39, MP3 14.06 Mb
You Man - Birdcage (Theus Mago Version) / Key Bm, BPM 124, 4:39, MP3 11.64 Mb
ZARROUKI.YFGD - Simple Mind (FREE DOWNLOAD) (Original Mix) / Key Am, BPM 125, 7:37, MP3 18.70 Mb
ZUCC (BR) - I Like That (Original Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 126, 6:06, MP3 15.03 Mb
Zakari&Blange - Control Data (Original Mix) / Key Bbm, BPM 135, 6:38, MP3 16.30 Mb
Zappa, Henry Sour - Alien (Original Mix) / Key Fm, BPM 126, 3:18, MP3 8.04 Mb
Zerevo, AMRND - Hey Bitch (Extended Mix) / Key Em, BPM 125, 3:04, MP3 7.59 Mb
Zerevo, AMRND - Hey Bitch (Radio Edit) / Key Em, BPM 125, 2:18, MP3 5.75 Mb
Zoogy Bless - Que Ma (Extended) / Key Cm, BPM 126, 4:36, MP3 11.19 Mb
Zoogy Bless - Que Ma (Original Mix) / Key Cm, BPM 126, 3:14, MP3 7.91 Mb
shotobi - Impostor (Original Mix) / Key Abm, BPM 126, 4:22, MP3 10.60 Mb
sloli - Trainer (Original Mix) / Key Dbm, BPM 143, 5:33, MP3 13.54 Mb
Émilie Rachel - Get Low (Extended Mix) / Key Gm, BPM 124, 5:02, MP3 12.13 Mb
İsmail Uluçay - Blind (Original Mix) / Key F#m, BPM 140, 2:51, MP3 7.01 Mb
Забавка і Дмитрик - Винокурня (Original Mix) / Key Eb, BPM 113, 1:32, MP3 4.01 Mb
Забавка і Дмитрик - Музика і матюки (Original Mix) / Key D, BPM 132, 1:12, MP3 3.19 Mb
Забавка і Дмитрик - Шимпанзе (Original Mix) / Key Bm, BPM 86, 1:24, MP3 3.69 Mb
​
DOWNLOAD - progonlymusic com

So, I met him from an online game back in June 2023. At first, we were just friends, but after 2 months, we decided to date. When I first dated him, I still felt confused because it was my first time dating, I told myself, "Did i really like him or not?" But as time passed I felt like he is the one just from how we act almost the same and have similar humor plus he is a guy with the personalities i was looking for, i felt really connected with him. long story short, it was my birthday on april, and he gave me a ticket to visit him as a present and stay for about 3 months at his place. I was really happy and greatful, it's just the best thing ever!!. I was keeping it a secret from my (asian) family until a week before departure to keep it a surprise, time goes by and the moment happened. I told my dad and sister( I live with them in the same house) that I'm going on a trip to visit a "friend" but my dad knows I don't have the money so i told him my "friend" paid for all the expenses, he became really confused and shocked + suspicious cus why would a friend from the internet would do something that far. I was trying my best not to expose the fact that I'm gay and dating that guy but at the end I gave up and told him everything from how I'm a gay guy and have a boyfriend ( it was kinda my fault not telling him I'm gay at the first place) he was somewhat mad and upset but he "doesn't" judge me and "accept" me, same goes for my sister. But they won't let me go and visit my boyfriend because my dad doesn't want his son to have a romantic relationship with a guy and my sister who's a religious fanatic has a different views bout gays. I feel really hopeless now my plans are ruined because they won't let me go. I even try to talk to my dad again, but he just won't budge, What should I do?? Should I risk it and follow my heart, or should I just listen??
TL;DR; my dad and sister (my sister a religious fanatic) won't let me visit my boyfriend because they don't want me to date a guy (and scared bad things might happen to me), should I listen to them or should I just left my family behind and follow my heart??

(F21, M21, together for 2 years, found out 6 months ago)
TL;DR: relationship is healing after his porn addiction and micro-cheating. We have had many conversations, he makes a solid effort and seems to be a changed man. The problem now is the constant flashback reminders. How do you trust again, seeing daily triggers, when the relationship is seriously improving? How to reprogram the mind into renewing trust once more, so I’m not stuck in the past?
**I know people don’t read long posts but if even one person has advice I will seriously appreciate it! PSA: our first relationship. **
Been with my boyfriend for 2 years. He was my best friend before that for 3. I get it, we’re young and it’s normal for guys to watch porn blah blah blah. But this was cheating.
The week we were official, we discussed porn. I asked him how he would feel if I watched porn and vice versa. He expressed strong discomfort. I asked if it would be beneficial to us, he agreed it wasn’t. Since neither of us thought to gain sexual gratification through anybody else, and wouldn’t walk into a strip club or brothel, we decided not to do it online either. We agreed in the conversation that porn is now considered cheating, and off-limits boundary. He admitted to having a porn addiction before, since he was 12.
Fast forward to 6 months into the relationship. I noticed he became far more degrading in sex and also far less interested in me. He would make up excuses for being busy (despite living with me, I know it was quick but this wasn’t official living, he was with me 6 nights a week in a flat on my parents property. We basically lived together as I moved into the flat instead of the main house). After sex, I would explain that I don’t like being degraded THAT much (I normally don’t mind a bit but this was a noticeable difference). He apologised. I asked him if he was watching porn on countless occasions after that, feeling as though the sex was scripted or weirdly unnatural. I told him it was okay if he was watching, I would just prefer to know. He said “of course not” every. Single. Time.
Fast forward to 10 months in. At this point we had been official for that long, but “seeing” each other for roughly a year. I had consistent dreams about him cheating on me with the girl he slept with (my toxic ex-best friend, before we were together in school). She used to judge me for being close friends with him then one day said “I had sex with him last night” as if it was a power move that she got the guy who was flirting with me.
I had insecurities because she is tiny and petite, would talk shit about me to him and brag about having sex with him when he first showed signs of interest in me back at school). Before the porn I struggled with this history and used to cry mid-sex over it because I felt annoyed I wasn’t as sexually experienced or petite as she was. I hardly thought about her after overcoming this so it was weird I saw her fucking him in my dreams after 3 years no contact. My gut was screaming something is wrong.
He left his laptop at mine, (this never happens so I took the opportunity) he had openly told me the password to it before so I knew. Anyway, only come to find that in his search history he has Grace Charis, Kim Kardashian’s tits (he typed a typo so he searched 9 times to find the images) and other girls scattered through his timeline since the last time he cleared his search history. This was without incognito, I could only imagine what else was hidden. It killed me because he told me one of his friends’ girlfriends looked like Kim Kardashian once, I instantly remembered. Yuck.
What hurt most was his instagram. He “never” uses it, and often takes days to respond to cute stuff I send him on there. Turns out he was searching Asian AI pornstar models on instagram (hana_bunny bunny or something), 2 DAYS after my birthday! (Which he put barely any effort into. My 21st he bought me a bucket of cheese and flowers. Thanks I guess?? I spent hundreds for his 21st and made him a book of personalised memories and drawings).
Fast forward. I felt sick to my stomach like never before. Left work early and he knew I went home because he noticed my car wasn’t at work, so he came over. I confronted him. Asked him if he remembered how we talked about porn being cheating? He said yes. I asked him why he thought I deserved to be cheated on then, to which he was silent. I explained how I felt and cried to him saying I would never look like them, and we agreed not to do it.
He confessed straight away. I asked him what genres he normally went for, of course he said “college girls fucking”. Also said he mostly used the top pornhub results that week and did it roughly twice a week for the past 8 months despite the conversation. I believe it was more times than this. At least he was admitting to some of it.
Lots of discussing followed and has ever since. Lots of empty-handed apologies when it was brought up. He purchased porn blockers that I could easily outwit within half a second of testing. But at least he was spending money to fix the problem and it was his idea.
He offered couples counselling but it’s so expensive, I can barely afford rent. He’s offered to pay but I think I need private sessions first, I’m exhausted even explaining this in writing let alone talking to a stranger. I think it’s just a me problem now.
He then decided living with his mates would be better than living with me, despite us going to the same city and same university for the next year ahead. I had turned down moving to another state because he said he would never move there. He told me I had “no chance” of ever living with him and his friends in a heated argument. He said he didn’t want me to “become an accessory to his life”, words he has apologised for but I never forgot.
He moved in with them… but here’s the thing. One of (our mutual) roommate friends has a girlfriend (different girl⁾ whom he has admitted he used to be really attracted to. I told him I would feel gutted that he couldn’t just choose to live with strangers instead so I don’t have to deal with the discomfort of him seeing her potentially more than me, and also that way we would both be in the same position, starting fresh (not choosing his friends over living with me). He then tells the boyfriend I’m upset because he used to like his girlfriend and sugarcoated it, which obviously isn’t the whole story. He told me his friends say I’m crazy for being upset over that, lessening the chance of me ever mingling with them again. Mind you, these guys have all cheated on their partners before and discouraged him from living with me.
Fast forward again. I’m struggling to find a job. I have to pay triple rent because he doesn’t want to live with me at this new place. He has job offers left right and centre, one of them being at a hostel, which is also a club. I told him any of the other 8 jobs sound really good, that’s the only one I’m uncomfortable with due to his porn addiction. I’m worried he will just be flirting the whole time. I was right. He chose that job despite the sadness and anxiety he knew it would bring me.
One day, he BUTT DIALLED me at work (lmaooo). I could hear him flirting with girls in another language (I didn’t know he was learning another language!) and laughing with them like I’ve never heard before. Then he bragged about it to his coworkers and said “she’s so nice, such a great girl”. They cheered him on for speaking the language.
I was fuming. I nearly called it quits that night but since, he has been making an effort. He has drastically improved his behaviour and genuinely makes an effort. He said he has changed his ways, he has apologised many times and though I don’t think he’s necessarily watched porn since I found out, it has been 6 months since, and I’m devastated like it’s the day it happened. The flirting. The way he behaves when I’m not around. I will never know when he’s being disloyal, which sucks. But it’s not like he’s actively messaging or sleeping or hooking up with anyone, it’s only small stuff.
He has done little things here and there to try and reignite the passion: flowers, cards, chocolates and dates etc. which I really appreciate. He doesn’t leave his laptop at mine, even if he knows he is coming back over the same day with it, which was a red flag to me. But so far, I don’t think he’s watching porn. And I have seen a huge improvement in the relationship overall.
My problem now is the reminder. I can’t trust him the way I used to. Every time I see a model I want to crumble. Every time I see Kim Kardashian or Kanye or golfers (Grace) or ads or beautiful women from different countries, it kills a part of me. I have no idea how to move on from this. I get flashbacks all the time. Our intimacy is pretty good still. But every time he calls me beautiful I don’t buy it. There’s always someone better, I feel worthless and I can’t control it anymore. I feel terrible because whilst he’s making great efforts, I still don’t trust him and feel insanely insecure at the thought of him getting to live a double-life. He is a beautiful soul who really does bring out the child in me and I don’t want to lose that. I feel so bad that my brain has changed its thought process. We are now in a much better place together.
He has been proving himself but it still makes me feel like shit knowing I was never good enough for him in the first place. I was his 7th, he was my 1st, not that I care but it explains my devastation. Hence why it’s so heavy for me. I gave him everything and it still wasn’t enough. He was happy to keep secrets and risk the relationship on multiple occasions, but now that things are fine I’m starting to process more. I need a quick fix to changing my mindset and believing him again to save our relationship. Because things are different now and I have hope for us in the future.
—————————- I would LOVE advice on ways to reverse negative thinking. Ways to forgive, truly, and to learn how to believe partners again. I need new tools to be more resilient and confident again, otherwise this won’t survive. I wouldn’t have stayed with him if I didn’t think it was worthwhile, I don’t want to put 5 years down the drain and would like advice other than merely breaking up. I’ve seen a difference, I am the problem now.
Does anyone have any healthy mind habits they can share, or positive ways to overcome this situation? How do you trust again and stop comparing when triggers arise?

Sorry I wasn’t on yesterday, it was my birthday. I’ve seen a lot of people try to spread misinformation about what’s canon and what’s not canon to the Bendy lore. So I’m here to try to clear everything up. First off here are all the official quotes referring to the canonicity of the Bendy books.
“In regards to #Bendy books and content outside of the games, I've always viewed them as fun extras for people who want more from the universe. The super talented authors/artists who work on them are given freedom to make things their own. :) To me, the games decide the canon” The Meatly
“boy that's one way to wake up a fanbase haha! yes we said it 6 months ago, but i said it more clearly without any confusion. i'll post it again here: If you see it, hear it, read it in the games that we make, it is "canon” if you see it or read it in a book, it's not 'canon'.” Mike Desjardins
Defiantly 100% Canon
This is everything that’s without a doubt 100% canon to the Bendy lore.

1. Bendy and the Ink Machine(Game)
   
2. Bendy in Nightmare Run(Game)
   
3. Boris and the Dark Survival(Game)
   
4. Bendy and the Dark Revival(Game)
   
5. Bendy: Secrets of the Machine(Game)
   
6. Bendy in Snow Sillies(Short Film)
   
7. Bendy in Tombstone Picnic(Short Film)
   
8. Bendy in Tasty Trio Trouble(Short Film)
   
9. Bendy in Cheap Seats(Short Film)
   
10. Bendy in Haunted Hijynx(Short Film)
    
11. Bendy in Hellfire Fighter(Short Film)
    
12. Bendy in Cookie Cookin(Short Film)
    

Partially Canon
This is everything that we’re uncertain about. I’ll go into a bit more depth.

1. The Joey Drew Studios Employee Handbook(Book) and The Joey Drew Studios Employee Handbook Updated Edition

These books are a special case compared to the other Bendy books because they’re not an original story. Instead it’s a collection of events from the Joey Drew Studios timeline. It simply puts dates on events we already know happened, it even includes screenshots from the games. So in universe a “Joey Drew Studios Employee Handbook” was never released but I think it’s safe to say all the information from these books can be considered canon.

1. Bendy:Crack Up Comic Collection(Book)

This is basically the same case as the handbooks. In universe a “Crack Up Comic Collection” was never released but all the comics in the book can be considered canon comics made by Joey Drew Studios.

1. The Illusion of Living(Book)

I’m genuinely unsure how to place this one. The quotes have told us that unless the information appears in the games it’s not canon. But the Illusion of Living is an in universe book. So is this not the same book as the one in the games or…? Idk, if you want to think this one is canon I wouldn’t blame you because it’s kinda confusing.
Non Canon Books with Some Canon Information

1. The Bendy Book Trilogy(Dreams Come to Life/The Lost Ones/Fade to Black)

These are original stories set in the Bendy universe. The stories in these books are non-canon but information and characters from these books can become canon if they appear in the games. The new “Dreams Come to Life Graphic Novel” also doubles down on the non canonicity of the Bendy trilogy by using the BatDR design of the Ink Demon on the cover of the book.

I am 32 days out from my wedding, which means that it’s the time for final meetings with vendors making final decisions about food and booze and table layouts and flowers and all sorts of things
I was really banking on having my mom with me to help me with this stuff. I graduated from college two days ago and I’m exhausted and completely burned out and I was relying on having her with me at those meetings for support and advice
Instead of helping me, though, she has to spend these next two weeks where all the final decisions and a ton of work has to get done driving across the country to get my brother who earlier this week OD’d on fucking whippets, of all things, which apparently are in fashion again. He gave himself brain damage, and can’t take care of himself anymore so my parent have to go get him (and my other brother, who live together on the other side of the country) and bring him back to live with her and my dad so they can take care of him, and I can’t even let my mom know how upset I am to not have her here for this because she’s heartbroken about what happened to my brother.
On top of it all, I’m not supposed to tell anyone (except my fiancé who I tell everything to) what happened because my mom doesn’t want my brother to have to be embarrassed.
On the plus side, the degree I just graduated with is a teaching degree, which means I don’t start working until August, so I do have the time and ability to do everything myself. I just didn’t want to.
I just keep getting flashbacks to my 16th birthday when my parents insisted on going and getting my brother out of rehab for the day, even though I was really mad at him because he’d been getting high before driving me, and later my little brother, to school every morning for a long time, which is why my parents sent him to rehab in the first place.
TL;DR: Momm can’t help me with finalizing wedding plans and the month of wedding work because she has to drive across the country to retrieve my brother who overdosed on whippets.