Background:
23 y/o Male, 6ft, 175 lbs. Prior Military Firefighter and new LEO for a Land Management Law Enforcement Agency. Prior to training TB I would bounce around different fitness domains every 6 months or so, going from only bro splits on deployments to only heavy road/mountian biking other times of the year. I was usually "fit" but I never was satisfied with progression and never felt like I was fulfilling my goal to be an operational athlete that my job demands. Last fall I stumbled across the TB forums here and haven't looked back, I am incredibly happy with the balanced and structured approach that TB takes and am looking forward to progressing more in the future.
Progression:
Prior to TB:
Bench: 200 lbs
Squat: 170lbs
Pullups: 9 Body Weight
Hex Deadlift: 245 lbs
Fast 5 (After BB): 24:30
1.5 Mile Time: 11:07
After BB & Op/Black Pro
Bench: 220 lbs
Squat: 215lbs
Pullups: Bodyweight + 50lbs
Hex Deadlift: 295 lbs
Fast 5: 22:17
1.5 Mile Time: 09:42
Basebuilding:
Prior to BB I was the classic military guy, bang out 1.5 miles on a treadmill a few times about a month out from a PT test, snag a 11 something and call it a day. I would be hard pressed to find a time I ran more than 2 miles, let alone enjoy it. After basebuilding I really fell in love with running, especially trail running. I love the aerobic endurance it has given me, and the operational confidence that comes with that. I ran my first 14k trail race a few months ago, and now have my eye on longer swim/run and trail run events.
OperatoBlack Pro:
I ran OP/Black over the course of my police academy and really appreciated the flexibility it offers. Long day in the mat room? Easy. Just use that as a HIC day or do the minimum sets in the gym, and hit my LSS run on the weekends as a way to decompress. I think a more demanding plan would have burned me out, but in my situation it was the perfect way to balance my job training with my fitness training.
Next Steps:
I recently picked up GP and loved it. Looking into the end of 2024 and early 2025 I am really interested in competing in more endurance events like swim/run events or a 50k trail run while still making some much needed improvements to my strength numbers. I am starting a block of Capacity next week and plan to follow on with Velocity afterwards. All in all, this program and community was exactly what I had been searching for and I am excited to see where this progress takes me.

Hey there English isn't my first language so sorry for advance if this isn't very clear . I would like to know why this way of finding surface area of a sphere would fail so consider a perfect sphere now we cut this sphere into an infinite number of infinitesimal lines the angles between these lines Consequently would be approaching zero and I believe this is a valid math operation because I think a sphere is basically made out of infinite semi circles revolving around a certain point in perfect rotation and semi circles are just bended lines so I think this works anyway so now I want to unbend all these lines to be horizontal and since the angles between them tend to 0 and they are unbent in rotationl motion I think the shape that is formed is a circle and since each line represented half the circumference of the sphere so the radius of the circle is equal to pi×r the area of the circle would pi×(pi×r)² so giving Final formula pi³×r² I think the area of the circle is the surface area of the sphere because the sphere boundary was initially all constructed by these lines so I think the area they cover in space is still the same I would like someone to explain where I went wrong please and thanks in advance for the help

Most of us know about Miguel Alcubierre. For those of you living in another universe;

Alcubierre is best known for the proposal of "The Warp Drive: Hyper-fast travel within general relativity" that was published in the science journal Classical and Quantum Gravity. In this, he describes the Alcubierre drive, a theoretical means of traveling faster than light that does not violate the physical principle that nothing can locally travel faster than light. In this paper, he constructed a model) that might transport a volume of flat space inside a "bubble" of curved space. This bubble, named as Hyper-relativistic local-dynamic space, is driven forward by a local expansion of space-time behind it, and an opposite contraction in front of it, so that theoretically a spaceship would be placed in motion by forces generated in the change made by space-time. - WIKIPEDIA

His paper has been followed up by HUNDREDS of other peer-reviewed papers. The mathematics is sound and real. Others have even found pitfalls like the creation of relativistic waves of particles swept up with an FTL ship, immolating the destination planet.
There are those who believe that causality forbids ANY superluminal flight, but I sincerely hope they are wrong. Even if they are correct, the overwhelming majority of science fiction uses SOME kind of 'Warp' drive.
But what ELSE can a drive that operates by expanding space in front of it, and compressing space behind it, DO?

• First off, since it propels the ship by stretching and compressing spacetime asymmetrically, it uses NO REACTION MASS. Throttle the damn thing down, and you have a sub-light, reactionless drive! Pretty cool, eh?
• Since it can bend spacetime, a symmetrical, spherical gravitic gradient will BEND LIGHT. Set up the layers properly, and it can bend light right around your ship! The Romulans came up with this one... We call it CLOAKING. An Alcubierre drive generator ought to do this quite well. It would also demonstrate 'gravitational lensing' around the cloak's periphery.
• Terraforming planets like Mars will prove futile, unless you can give it a magnetosphere. There is a method to do this easily; Put a 1 Tesla magnetic field generator at Mars' L1 LaGrange point. While you're there, turn on your Alcubierre drive! Create a 9000-mile wide area of refraction and increase the solar energy striking Mars' surface threefold. This 'Gravitic Lens' has other uses;
• Telescopes that can see the edge of the universe. The ability to make refractive 'lenses' of virtually any arbitrary size could allow for telescopy on various wavelengths with amazing light-gathering capability.
• Creating a gravitational 'point source'. You can use your Alcubierre drive to bend space, and deflect the path of an asteroid, or other object in space. Hell, you could make a 'broom' and orbit it a few times around the Earth in a retrograde orbit, and clean up all of the space junk. Space Sweepers takes on a new meaning here.
• Finally, go FASTER-THAN-LIGHT. There are some compelling papers that suggest that FTL travel is possible under the laws of causality. See https://www.orionsarm.com/fm_store/FasterThanLight.pdf for a complete description.

Does anyone else have any OTHER uses for a device that can bend spacetime? It's not just a drive!

Firstly, from what I can tell it seems like you need a class A certificate of competence to operate class 3R lasers (“low-intensity lasers”). To be more specific, I would be using a minuit une Photon. Is this correct?
If so, in order to get a class A certification I would need to either have a year of apprenticeship under a certified laser operator or complete an “acceptable laser training course” and then pass an exam. I would much rather take a course, however there is no indication anywhere of what courses are considered acceptable, and the only course I can find at all is this, but I can’t tell if it would satisfy the “acceptable course” requirement since the state regulations provide no specifics on this, and honestly the website seems sketchy.
Furthermore, from what I can gather the exam barely even pertains to lasers for live events and is mostly focused on construction and industrial usage. This entire thing seems like a ridiculous bureaucratic red tape mess and is very frustrating. Has anyone else gone through this or does anyone have any more info or advice? How legally risky would it be to just say fuck it and use a Photon without proper certification? I know basic laser safety regarding MPE and Photons have been widely used safely and most places besides NY don’t require a cert or anything for it. The most immediate usage I want would be in a public park which I figure might cause a stink if I tried to use it but could I get away with it in a private venue? I understand the law is the law, but this really seems like bullshit that serves no real purpose to me, and there is not even a clear route to actually getting the certification.

My name is Dr. Smith, not my real name of course, but for purposes of storytelling it will have to suffice. I have been practicing medicine at an Asian country as a general practitioner. I'm relatively new and I practice at a small village, not too far from civilization, half a day's travel by car and a few hours by boat from the country's capital, but very rural nonetheless, complete with superstitious beliefs and customs. I decided to stay here when I first graduated and passed the licensure exam for two reasons: first, I have a place to stay here, my family's ancestral home (although none of my direct relatives have lived there for years), said ancestors being one of the first people to settle in the area and second, because my family had always been the physicians in this small community as far as anyone remembers. Me, my grandfather and his father before him all went to the city to study medicine and went back here to practice it, like there was a pull, a calling, to sacrifice the convenient, fast-paced city life for the quiet and serene. My mother hated the idea, as clingy as she is to me, saying things like she wanted me to always be around where she could protect me, but you can't really help it when purpose calls. To be honest, it feels good providing a wide range of services to the honest people of our small, humble town, no greater feeling than helping the less privelaged, educating them and dispelling preconceived notions and old wives tales which are aplenty in my country, especially here.
I still recall how everything began. I made a makeshift clinic at one of the rooms of my ancestral home, it used to be my grandfather's office, but it felt old, antique, and perhaps too... professional, nothing wrong with that, but I wanted my patients to feel a more homely setting. So, I rearranged a bit, removed the imposing self portrait of my great-grandfather wearing his white coat that hang on the wall and transferred it to a more private area of the house. I changed the dim, barely functioning lights into brighter, more modern ones, removed the exceedingly extravagant chandelier and equipped the room with materials and equipment that I deemed necessary for my practice. I retained the wooden floors, but outfitted the walls with charts and more colorful decorations, in anticipation for the occasional pediatric patient. It was beginning to look less like an old abandoned house where teenagers went for the spooks and more like a place of healing and betterment, a clean place offering a clean mind...or so I hope.
"Your grandfather would have a heart attack if he wasn't dead already, seeing what you've done with his old clinic" quipped Martha, our housekeeper. All I know about Martha is that my grandfather hired her as a young teen and she has been here since then, she babysat and raised my mother as her own, and even took care of me as a toddler. Considering her age, she mostly supervises the younger and more capable help rather than doing tasks herself. None of them stay at the house, but they get called upon when me or any of my relatives were expected. Most of the family consider her as one of our own at this point.
"Well i'm sure great grandpa on the other hand enjoys the change of view" I replied jokingly. "Besides, I bet the patients would appreciate not being treated in such a dark, gloomy room."
"You know how your grandfather was..." she replies, that the idea of a dark, gloomy, old man liking dark, gloomy, old places was a no brainer. "...but everything aside, it is so nice to see you again, have you been feeling better? What did your mother think of you staying here?" she said with what I felt as outmost sincerity, "I used to chase and carry you around this estate and now look at you, about to carry out your family's legacy as a physician yourself" she continued, with a hint of pride from her tone.
I smiled. I myself couldn't think of a reason why a well respected man, revered even, by this town and it's people for everything he has done would act nonchalant and depressed, always with a jaded look in his eyes and stay in an equally dim and depressing part of his house, I've always known him to be like that, but was he always?
"I am better now. It's good to see you too, I'm glad you're staying healthy, and mom sure did not like it but well...she told me to say hi on her behalf" I told Martha. She beams up and smiles on my mother's mention.
"Well...I took the liberty of digging up your grandfather's documents, records and his patient charts, I doubt many of them still live but I thought maybe you'd like to have a look, I placed them around your desk but I can relocate them if you want me to"
"No, that's perfect. That's something I actually intended to do, i'll give it a read, thank you" I replied. I know some of those patients were either old or probably dead to be honest, but seeing data as well as the cases my grandfather had to deal with might help me in the future.
"The villagers already know Dr. Smith's grandson is here, they know you're a doctor, so expect to have a patient one of these days, perhaps as soon as you give the word that your clinic is open" Martha said, as she walks out of the room smiling and slightly waving, signalling a goodbye.
"I'm not even surprised" I think to myself. Places like these, words spreads like wildfire on topics like these, the idea of someone from a known family, coming back from the city, not to mention deciding to stay indefinitely, like the whole village needed notification, like the village demands explanation.
Hours passed and as I was satisfied with my new setup for the clinic, I took a break, sitting down and looking at the mountain of paperwork and folders placed on and around my desk. I picked one, thinking to myself that I might as well have a look now, with nothing else of note to do.
Patient #010438 Name redacted 43/Female
History of present illness: Patient had 3 day history of undocumented fever, dysuria, and bilateral flank pain Did not seek consult, no medications taken
Past Medical History Unremarkable
Personal and Social History Unremarkable
OB history illegible
Physical Examination BP 110/80 HR 102 RR 20
Nonhyperemic tonsils No murmurs Clear breath sounds Nontender abdomen (+) Kidney punch test
Noted a signature of the patient claiming she was not pregnant as a form of waiver
"Jesus grandpa, couldn't your history and physical exam get any lazier?" I thought to myself. Seeing pertinent history not asked and multiple organ systems ignored on physical examination. Given, some of the writing were already faded, the quality of the paper had deteriorated greatly, and plenty of details already illegible, all in all the documents weren't that bad. It sure doesn't help though that he writes like someone in the middle of a warzone practicing heiroglyphs.
I skimmed through more of the documents and patient files, most of the cases are relatively benign, majority are outpatient visits, some are emergency cases and there are the rare ones requiring transfer to a more developed town hours from here with better services and equipment. Time passed and as I lay down the last folder in a pile, I noticed a moderately sized box, probably the size of a briefcase, placed on the floor, dusty but obviously ornate. It piqued my interest although in my mind, I was pretty sure it was nothing but more documents, I decided to give it a look.
I picked a stack up and I started to read:
Patient #00512c Name redacted 32/Female
"Weird" I thought, it was numbered differently, and definitely none of the other documents were lettered. I continued reading:
History of present illness: This is a case of a 32 year old female who came in on date redacted due to a chief complaint of multiple hematomas, abrasions, burn wounds and lacerations on her face, trunk and extremeties..."
"Trauma? An accident? Possible abuse?" I contemplated.
"...patient allegedly noticed easy bruisability 2 weeks prior to consult, followed by alleged spontaneous appearance of abrasions and lacerations 2-3 days from onset of bruising, supposedly waking the patient at night due to the sudden sharp and searing pain, initially small cuts 3-5cm widest on her extremeties and face but eventually progressing to deep cuts measuring approximately 10-50cm on her back, chest, abdomen and lower extremeties. 1 week prior to consult, patient started noticing burning sensations on her skin, causing extreme pain and leaving reddish burn marks on her body, patient also experienced lack of appetite and inability to sleep due to loud voices and..."
"Spontaneous appearance? Easy bruising could be a lot of things, but for it to occur with 'spontaneous' abrasions and lacerations? Not to mention burn marks?" I thought out loud, having doubts about the credibility of the use of the word "spontaneous". Surely it was not an accident, considering it started 2 weeks ago with noted progression. "It could be a hematologic problem with the bruising, but that wouldn't explain the sudden appearance of cuts...maybe accompanied by a dermatologic one, the patient is prone to breaks in the skin? But then again the burn marks...the voices..." I analyzed. I was leaning towards abuse, where the cuts and bruises were inflicted by someone else and the abused, whether in some form of fear or coping, decides that it was "spontaneous" rather than inflicted, but why bother lying to yourself, perhaps the one who did it to her is a partner? Or a loved one? It made sense, someone progressively becoming more aggressive with her as time went by, becoming more and more extreme, from bruises to eventually burning.
It could a combination of illnesses to be honest, one on top of another, perhaps an overly sensitive or extremely dry skin that breaks and peels until it bleeds, an allergic reaction prompting the patient to unconciously scratch till her skin became red and lichenified, voices due to lack of sleep or a mental disorder. But looking at my grandfather's physical examination of her, none of the findings solidifies the possibility of those i've mentioned. Truth be told I also partially allowed myself to tunnel vision on the prospect of an abuse, to the point I've skipped some of the chart's contents that I deemed weren't important and tried to look for information to support my claim, or perhaps to disprove it, rookie mistake, but well, I am a rookie then.
"Patient is widowed, lives alone at a secluded area near redacted, only goes out to buy some necessities from redacted but has very minimal interaction from anyone in the village"
Okay then, either she is hiding the fact someone was with her, who is abusing her like I initially thought of, or it's self harm. "I'm pretty sure grandpa considered everything that went through my mind right now. Let me check his initial impression" I thought, with a tinge of annoyance, considering I felt that the patient lied to my grandfather, and was lying to me, decades after the fact.

1 Trauma, to consider physical abuse versus self harm;

"Alright, now we're getting somewhere" I said to myself, with a bit of pride having the same thought process as a physician with decades more experience than I do.

2 To consider mental disorder, probably psychotic - premature dementia

I chuckled. Premature dementia, didn't think i'd see that term, I thought everyone including those from his time would have used schizophrenia already, then again medicine and medical knowledge isn't as easily passed around as it is now. Psychiatry as a science would be relatively new during his time compared to other disciplines so the fact he considered it based on the patient hearing "voices"? Bravo gramps.
"Well...", I thought to myself, "...plenty of things to consider and rule out, let me check what else is there." A bit of cockiness on picking my grandfather's brain out and feeling good about my train of thought, a practice consult and so far, I'm on my way to a perfect score...

3. To consider possession probably secondary to malevolent spirit

.................
I gave the document a stern look, unmoving, unblinking, emotionless. Time has stopped, and I haven't noticed. My brain trying to digest the information, the same way my stomach would probably digest a block of steel...it's just not possible. I read one of my grandfather's diagnosis again:

3 To consider possession probably secondary to malevolent spirit

I never been one for faith. Evidence is everything. Science is everything. You can replicate it, you can prove it. Most importantly...It. Makes. Sense. I look at beliefs not based on evidence and feel nothing but skepticism if not disdain. Why won't people listen to expert opinion? Why won't people believe in facts? Why explain the unknown in such convoluted ways, requiring submission of oneself when the only thing the truth requires is but comprehension. I looked at that diagnosis feeling disappointment.
Then I felt anger. "Grandpa, what the fuck is wrong with you?!" I thought to myself. Here is a woman, full of bruises, cuts and burns all over her body, claiming that she has been suffering for weeks, barely eats or sleeps, was having auditory hallucinations, in dire need of medical, if not emotional and psychological support and one of the things that comes across your mind is possession.
I tried to calm my mind, these are records of the past anyway, I thought. Maybe it was a resignation born out of incompetence. Maybe grandpa wasn't as good of a doctor as I thought he was, that the shortcomings of his knowledge and limited technology of his time prompted him to adopt a more...liberal viewpoint to medicine. Maybe he was just superstitious himself. Maybe the people of this place had leaked some of their local beliefs into his psyche. Maybe isolation changed the man. Or maybe...just maybe...there's something to it.
I've never been one for faith. That goes for my faith in science as well. To just say that something is stupid because it doesn't align with standard, accepted scientific belief is just as detrimental as its counterpart.
I decided to investigate further when I heard the entrance to the room open with force. One of the maids leaning onto the wall by the entrance, still grasping the doorknob and evidently out of breath.
"Sir...ma'am Martha...calling...for you...says...it's...it's...an emergency..." She says in between breaths.
I quickly stood up, feeling sorry for the woman, she just ran, obviously gasping for air as she arrived at the clinic and now has to lead me back to wherever she came from with the same urgency. At first I was worried something might have happened with Martha, what the maid said didn't really give much clarity, but upon arriving at the main hall I noticed Martha, standing beside a middle aged man and woman, carrying a child, no more than 10 years old. I notice the clear panic and worry on both of their eyes as the man held the boy, who was uncontrollably shaking.
"I know you're not taking any patients yet and I was considering the time, but nobody knows what to do so I..." Martha explains, quite concerned while I ordered the parents to put the child flat on the ground, with me assessing the situation. The first thing I noticed was that the child was burning hot, "possibly febrile seizure? No, too old" I thought. I asked both the parents important details while I ordered the other maid to time the duration of the child's seizure. All the while thinking of possible diseases that may present as such, "Seizure disorder? Epilepsy? Meningitis? Encephalitis?" Eventually the shaking stopped, much to the parents' relief, and I ordered them to carry the boy as we made our way back to the clinic.
"Was this the first time it ever happened?" I inquired, as I put the child on one of the beds in the clinic, securing the corners with additional pillows, noticing the sunken face and apparent exhaustion from the boy, possibly due to the ongoing fever and the recent seizure episode. Once secured, I face the parents and continued my inquiries, I eventually explained everything, elaborating on what I believe happened, I explained that for now, lowering the fever and investigating the source were what we could address, the battery of tests I plan to do (disappointingly, most of them cannot be done here, and I would have to accompany them to a hospital on another town as soon as first light breaks), and the medications and management I plan to give. Everything proceeded as planned and I asked both parents to relax and take a breather, offering them a seat and asking the help to give them water.
Things eventually settled, little Johnny's fever subsided and color came back to him. Nowhere near clear, he can worsen anytime, but that was the best that we could do at that time. The parents were still worried, understandably so, but to an extent reassured, we have a plan after all. Martha, as well as Diane (the help from earlier), now at a calmer state. We discussed the plan, how we would travel, who would accompany us and what we would bring. Eventually, our conversations became relaxed, started to shift to other things, trivial matters, such as were they lived in the village, the date and time of my arrival, recent gossip, where Martha was more than happy to share.
"I was worried the evil spirits might have gotten my baby..." Said the mother nonchalantly, as we talked about the occurrence on a lighter note. "...that's how they got Mrs. Johnson's middle child. That poor boy was never the same after."
I smiled. Not wanting to immediately correct them and sound like an uptight individual. It's part of our culture afterall, old belief systems and a way for people to cope with loss or difficulty, who was I to deny them that. I won't approach these people the hardheaded way, but I will slowly show them the realities and truths of the things they may not understand, well, at least with regards to their health.
"Well, little Johnny is safe here, we'll do what we can" pointing to their son.
Only, their son wasn't where he was supposed to be. I look at the parents, I look at both Martha and Diane, everyone who looked at where I pointed were just as shocked as I was, a split second of silence before panic ensued. Suddenly, everyone stood up on high alert and was looking everywhere. Under covers, under the bed, corners of the room, the desk, behind curtains, hell, I saw Diane look at one of the damn drawers, as if a 10 year old would fit there.
Suddenly I heard loud vomiting, retching, followed by sounds of splashing. I follow where the sounds came from and see a large pool of black, tarry liquid at a corner of my room. I slowly trace where it was coming from and there he was...little Johnny...standing...upside down...on the ceiling.
I hear everyone in the room scream, I was probably screaming too, I couldn't remember. I do remember little Johnny screaming with us though, extremely high pitched and mockingly, with bloodshot eyes, upside down, while black liquid poured from his mouth, covering his face and dripping from his hair. How was that even possible, screaming while liters of unknown fluid dripped from his mouth? I don't know.
Then he laughed, although I was pretty sure that wasn't his voice. It was deep and guttural, it cannot be the boy's voice, it cannot be any boy's voice.
Time seemed to move in slow motion, I was noticing every detail, every expression from everyone's face, I can feel the seconds hand on my wall clock move, the slow dripping of the viscous dark liquid from little Johnny, I can feel every drop of sweat on my body. I could not cope with what i'm experiencing, was it a trick of the mind, an organized prank, have I gone mad...again? So I did the only thing I know how to do...
I tried to diagnose.
"Maybe it was dengue shock all along!" I thought to myself. "Vomiting blood, paleness, fever, an episode of seizure and definitely change in sensorium" I reasoned to myself. I was coping, and I was coping hard. I was ready to drown on my self absorbtion when a booming voice snapped me out of my thoughts.
"YOU DUMB FUCK, WILL ANY ILLNESS EXPLAIN WHY YOUR FUCKING PATIENT IS HANGING UPSIDE DOWN ON THE FUCKING CEILING?" Said little Johnny, or at least whoever was speaking on his behalf, because from where I'm standing, I can clearly see that the boy was not mouthing any of the words he said.
"YOU'RE A FUCKING FAILURE, DOCTORS LIKE YOU SHOULD KILL THEMSELVES! HAHAHAHA" he laughed, I never knew laughs could sound like that, as if the words were nails, and his voice box a chalkboard.
"OH WAIT, YOU FAILED AT THAT TOO DOC! FUCKING PATHETIC!"
Of all the things that were happening...a young boy hanging upside down, a mother crying on the floor hysterically, a father staring at his son, eyes wide open and mouth agape, Martha and Diane, both crying while sharing a rosary, in the act of what I assume to be prayer...the thing that snapped me out of my trance was the words that came from little Johnny. Knowledge nobody but the closest to me should know. A secret I planned to leave behind when I left the city, a wound I intended to forget as I started anew.
Visions of my memories came flashing back...medical school...overwhelming duty...familial expectations...failure...depression...my attempt...a bottle of medications...my mother...crying...on my bedside...
"LEAVE MY SON ALONE!" Johnny's father screamed. Starling everyone in the room.
Nothing matters, the past is in the past, I am better now, and that boy needs help, more than anything.
"YOUR SON? WHY DON'T WE ASK THAT CRYING WHORE IF JOHNNY REALLY IS YOUR SON" The voice says, laughing.
At that point the mother stops crying, looks up towards johnny, then towards his husband, in a state of shock. Like what the voice said is crazier than whatever was happening at the moment.
"THE ONLY REASON THAT WHORE STUCK WITH YOU WAS BECAUSE JOHNNY'S REAAAAAAAL FATHER WOULD NOT TAKE HER!" The entity says, continuing the hysteric laughter.
We were being played. It was toying with us. And from the look on the mother's face...it seems like little Johnny did not even need to lie to do it.
Then, to everyone's horror..."It" started to run.
It ran across the ceiling in a rabid frenzy, erratic and forceful, running and jumping, hopping sideways then going on all fours, still attached to the ceiling, splashing bile and blood all over the room, all the while making a "hihihi" sound...childish and terrifying. It ran and ran, repeating the same erratic change in movements, repeating the same eerie giggle until it reached the window, stopping and standing straight, it stared outside for what felt like forever...then all of a sudden...johnny just fell, like whatever was attaching him to the ceiling just gave, headfirst into the floor, giving a very audible cracking sound.
I heard a gasp from johnny's mother. I can at least detect some miniscule chest expansion, but that cracking sound cannot be anything good. As if thinking the same thing, Martha, who was the nearest to where Johnny fell, while still clinging tightly to Diane's rosary, approached the boy.
"Johnny?" She said softly, all the while approaching an inch at a time.
As she was almost at arms length of the boy's body, she gives the mother a knowing look, confirming that he was breathing. Martha suddenly produces a piece of cloth from one of the pockets of her uniform, possibly to pack the bleeding from the head. She intended to put the cloth on top of the boy's head, but looked towards my direction, urging me forward, perhaps for me to place it properly. I walk towards the boy, takes the cloth from Martha and as I fold the cloth to circle Johnny's cranium with Martha's help, the boy immediately sat up, looks at Martha and smiles ear to ear...literally ear to ear.
"GET YOUR WRINKLY HANDS OFF ME YOU DUSTY OLD FUCK!" He barks at her, Martha screams in fear and I was taken aback.
That was all the time Johnny needed to stand and jump towards the window, breaking it and running towards the mountainside. I hear his father scream his name, quickly breaking more glass so he could fit, and immediately giving chase. The mother was still on the floor, wailing towards the direction of her child and husband. Martha, in shock, still holding the cloth she intended to wrap johnny with.
It took me a while to notice Diane shaking me vigorously. "Doctor!" She screams. "Doctor Smith! What should we do!?" She voices out, with obvious desperation.
I ignored her.
I feel scared, but taking all into consideration, I predominantly feel tired. Defeated. Insulted.
I have nothing more to give in the face of whatever that thing that took Johnny was.
I slowly walk towards my desk, I open my drawer, I take a piece of paper and I pull out my pen.
Patient #00001a Name redacted 10/M
I write, giving no thoughts to the people on the same room as me, those left behind by little Johnny and his father. "Did he catch up to him? Was the boy alright now?...is his father alright?" I wonder. I'll find out soon enough, I figured, rumors spread like wildfire around here anyways.
I continued to write with resignment, absorbed in my own little world, consumed by the horror I witnessed, the breaking of my spirit, of my beliefs, the questioning of my knowledge. I want to escape it, deny it, but that's not what should be done to the truth. So I surrendered.

1 To consider possession probably secondary to malevolent spirit

END

Hi! I am living in an apartment that I suspect should be rent stabilized, but is not (landlords require rent payments in cash, I doubt they report the income or keep up with stabilization requirements). Apartment is 6 units, built in ~1900, and landlord occupies one of the units.
I would like to request my rent history from https://portal.hcr.ny.gov/app/ask . However, my landlords live in the building. There are no mail boxes. Landlord sorts and distribute mail. I am curious if the envelope is clearly marked as a rent history inquiry? Are they likely to know I am investigating this upon seeing the envelope? Additionally, is there any chance of them getting in trouble for tax evasion as a result of my inquiry?
Possibly relevant info: been living in the apartment for ~4 years. No rent increases, rent is quite reasonable for the area. Had a lease my first year, but they opted to default to month-to-month after that year elapsed. I've had some issues with them as of late (they are forbidding overnight guests well under the 30 day law, and it is never more than one guest -- my out of continent partner visited once for a week and they said it was unacceptable). So, if it is stabilized, I would love to have the security of knowing that. But if it isn't, I don't want them to see the inquiry, get upset, and use that as reason to terminate my rental agreement. Appreciate any/all advice!

So my mother in law likes to go to musical plays, like theater plays where they act, dance, and sing. She goes like every week to one and she enjoyed it and it’s HER hobbie. A few months ago she asked me if I was interested in going with her to one, and I told her yes, thinking that it would only be a one time thing and why not just go. Anyways I ended up enjoying it but I wouldn’t do it again and repeatingly go watch them with her. We’ll anyways she ends up booking me into 5 more plays after that without telling me the dates or consulting me first about it. I ended up just going to the 5 theatre plays she booked me into within the months thinking that these 5 would be the last ones I’d have to go to. Make a long story short after those 5 plays finished i over heard her say to my husband that she has booked me in for all of this year and next years musical theatre plays. and she never told me!!! She never told me about any of the bookings, times, or even what there called. She just books me and doesn’t sjt tell me and assumes I will just go with her. My husband told his mom “why don’t you ask her if she wants too first, or if she can go” and she responds “well she has lots of time to book of” She hasint said a word to me about the plays she booked me into or even what there caller she just tells me a week before and goes “we have a play this week” and I have to just go with it. To me this is not cool and I actually find it disrespectful that she doesn’t eisnt consult or ask me if I want to go, she just thinks she can book me in and not ask me first.
What do I do? What should I say to her.

So my mother in law likes to go to musical plays, like theater plays where they act, dance, and sing. She goes like every week to one and she enjoyed it and it’s HER hobbie. A few months ago she asked me if I was interested in going with her to one, and I told her yes, thinking that it would only be a one time thing and why not just go. Anyways I ended up enjoying it but I wouldn’t do it again and repeatingly go watch them with her. We’ll anyways she ends up booking me into 5 more plays after that without telling me the dates or consulting me first about it. I ended up just going to the 5 theatre plays she booked me into within the months thinking that these 5 would be the last ones I’d have to go to. Make a long story short after those 5 plays finished i over heard her say to my husband that she has booked me in for all of this year and next years musical theatre plays. and she never told me!!! She never told me about any of the bookings, times, or even what there called. She just books me and doesn’t sjt tell me and assumes I will just go with her. My husband told his mom “why don’t you ask her if she wants too first, or if she can go” and she responds “well she has lots of time to book of” She hasint said a word to me about the plays she booked me into or even what there caller she just tells me a week before and goes “we have a play this week” and I have to just go with it. To me this is not cool and I actually find it disrespectful that she doesn’t eisnt consult or ask me if I want to go, she just thinks she can book me in and not ask me first.
What do I do? What should I say to her.

Hurricane Georg.
Our first contact with the new world was a colossal hurricane. Veins of lightning shattered through the black, swirling clouds. I had just tried to calm the nerves of the ship when I saw Suri sitting in the hall beneath the control room.
She was in a lounge corner with her suitcase opened and her supplies scattered across the small table. The little light from the window illuminated her drawing for me to see over her shoulder.
The black and white sketch began at the bow of the ship. The figure of a man in facing the open ocean. Ahead of him, the familiar despair of Hurricane Georg. The man had his back towards the artist, but his stature sailed through the fierce storm without worry. His gaze only in the beautiful sight of home on the other side.
Her pencil began to etch the details of his crewmans jacket, "You have a gift, Suri. Truly, you do."
She was ahead of me, she did not jump or gasp as I had expected, "Thank you, Capi. I saw you in the reflection. Im hard to get the jump on."
"Then this shouldnt surprise you," I smiled and approached her table. "My capi stars are on the right side, "I stepped back and tapped my shoulder."
Disappointment inked her face, darkening her mood, "Dam."
I laughed and pulled up a chair. She had captured the view from the window perfectly and I made a point to tell her. As we talked the storm outside began to fade. The world around us was healed and the worries of yesterday had never existed.
Her eyes were near black, in color, and her skin was incredibly warm. Physical characteristic were useless to determine where a person was from, but 500 years ago, she would have fit at home with the people of the Middle East. Had I been a different man, her beauty and brain would make a perfect partner.
The longer I stared, the darker the world around us became. Until she broke my gaze and looked shocked at something through the window.
"Did you see that?"
"No, what was it?"
"I-Im not sure..." her face drained of color as the harsh rocking of the storm was interrupted by something else. Suri and I were flung off our chairs onto the floor, her supplies pelting us as they flew through the air. I tried to stand, but my legs were too soft to make it easy.
I struggled to a kneel using the bolted-down desk. Suri gasped and I looked down. The longer I looked, the itchier it became. Once more the world grew darker and I only had enough energy for a simple joke.
"Mr. Morgs was right about those things."
"Gud morning, Capi!" Ennay cheered from the wall-mounted screen.
I struggled to sit myself up. I was in the infirmary, only Ennay was there to greet me. My jacket was gone. All I had on was a white t-shirt and grey shorts.
"Officer Angelhart had your attire taken to be cleaned," Ennay chimed in, "Today is Wednesday, sir, 4:13am. Its the morning after you lost consciousness."
I thanked him and asked him to catch me up on the happenings in the passed half day.
"The reality is unclear, Capi, but Helmsman Archer believes we were attacked by a... a sea monster, sir."
"Archer? Hes no storyteller. Why?" I swung my legs over the bed, "get him down here or tell him im on my way."
Ennay surprised me with his fast response, "No. Sir, We had a breach. Ms. Aziz told the Doctor you had severed and artery during a spell of turbulence. The New Horizon had actually made contact with something what breached the hull. Damage Control responded in 4 minutes and were quick to contain flooding. However, we sustained a second breach."
Before he could continue, I dropped back onto the bed, "Whats the status?"
"On the New Horizon? Operational. A few sections had to be permanently sealed until we are out of this storm."
"And Damage Control?"
Ennay did not respond as quickly as he had been. It felt like an eternity before he told me, "6 casualties," the room fell completely silent. I couldnt even hear my heart beating, "5 fatalities. Sergant Franccigo Blanco is recovering in Infirmary 4C. He is unconscious, but has sustained gruesome wounds. Officer Angelhart declared a S.O.E. to assume your position. Otherwise,..."
"Yes, yes, the prosthetics. I hate that system."
"Well, sir, you are able to disable it."
"What?"
"Its not a very common scenario, but since we are not in International Sea, the law requiring your presence does not necessarily need to be enforced."
I sat back and thought for a second, "Ill discuss it with Dr. Mally. Where are they all?"
"Dr. Mally is in Infirmary 4C with Sergant Blanco. Officer Angelhart is your office filling out an incident report for both your accident and the breaches."
"Thank you, Ennay. Tell Max I am on my way and then let Dr. Mally know I will meet her shortly."
"Of course, sir."
My office was silent except for the fan gently spinning from the ceiling. Across from me was a young man, mid-twenties, with dusty blond hair. His uniform was perfect, he has even removed his hat on the perfect beat upon entering the room.
The appearance and demeanor any ship captain would be beyond proud to accept on his ship. It had just been dumb luck that he had lost both of his eyes to shrapnel sealing off the lower corridors during the state of emergency yesterday.
I poured Mr. Blanco a drink, 2444 Geoff Russel - The Hearty Mans Drink. I needed to finish the incident report, but Id never ask a man to relive what he had without a bit of buzz to his bite.
"So, Sargent Blanco, I-"
"You can call me, Fran, Capi."
"And you can call me Santago, for tonight anyway," I continued my questions. I tried my best to stay shallow and not dive deep into the pain Fran had endures just hours ago.
We talked about the 5 fatalities.
"Did you... see... them die?"
The gauze replacing his eyes stared at me, blankly. His face was uncanny, unhuman. Like the man inside may actually have been a 6th dead body.
"No," he quickly took a drink, "I did hear them, though. They yelled and screamed for me to open the door. I- I couldnt see. I thought the sea water had poisoned me somehow. I kept rubbing and rubbing my eyes hoping to get whatever radioactive stuff out of my head..." He took a breath. He was remarkably calm. Agitated, of course. But calm.
He continued, "I looked through the window on the bulkhead and the last thing I saw was Aleks staring back at me. His eyes were... he was calling out for me, I am sure of it. But something got him and he was sucked out."
"I am so sorry, Fran," I tried to write as quietly as possible to not remind him of the formality, "Do you know what got him?"
He finished his glass. As he set it down, he missed the table. The cup did not shatter, but it had jolted Fran from his memory. He lost his composure.
He started yelling at me about a horrific beast he had seen. How Aleks, Private Aleksander Igorsen, had been encased in blood and black sludge. He swung his hands wildly at the table in a rage, but had only managed to knock over a lamp.
Pity does not begin to describe what I felt watching him. Like a bleeding animal continuing to run from the wolves despite not knowing he was already surrounded. In him, I saw death. I saw anger. I saw fear. I saw what he was feeling imaging the creature that killed his men.
I grappled with him, trying to make my location known and always talking to him. I was not some monster from the unknown blackness set on hunting him and he needed to know that. He continued to struggle until I had completely engulfed his whirlwind into a hug. The screams turned to cries and then to whimpers.
After some time, I dismissed him back to his room and instructed Ennay that he was on suicide watch. Sergant Franccigo Blanco had earned a promotion or a permanent dismissal, whichever he wanted, but I needed him to take time to himself before I reminded him where we are.
The storm was intense, but at least it was consistent. By Katzs reckoning, we are approaching the halfway point of this hurricane. We had entered it 51 hours ago and Katz had said we are another 50 away from clear skies.
Unfortunately for all of us, Katzs theory was not seen through.
It began with our solar panelling being severed from their operating power banks. That was not a major issue, hydropower was our primary source. The issue arose when the New Horizon began to spin.
I had radioed the Helmsman demanding why we are weighing anchor, but the anchor was still resting above water. He said no one dropped the anchor. Something else entirely had us. We rushed to every window, every pane of glass to search for whatever it was that was stopping us.
Ennay spoke out, "Capi, Major Gorlammi has spotted our snag at 129 degrees. Nearest viewpoint is Residential Room L3D, assigned to L-"
I ignored the rest, I needed to see what was in that window. Luckily for me, Lucy Partridge was not home. I burst through the door and, for the first time, I saw a behemoth of a serpent-like creature sticking out of the water. I could not see a head, nor tail. I also had no idea if what I saw was the body or an appendage connected to some inconceivably large beast.
After enough time, I manage to figure out one of the ships heavy guns had pierced the creature and was holding us together. Our best bet was to either rotate the gun and hope its dislodged or to remove the gun entirely.
I relayed this information to Ennay to alerted the Gunner Teams and Damage Control. Yet, none of them would be given the chance. In the distance, silhouetted by sparks of lightning the size of the ship, I saw the head of the creature. It must have been miles away, but the size was unparalleled. Its head leaped from the water and swiveled back towards us. It was like a colossal eel. Flashes of light showed through its skin like veins until it sent a surge into the gun and into the ship.
The lights went out across the boat. The only light was the occasional flash from outside. It was completely dark, but I knew it was still coming for us.
I ran out of the quarters as emergency lights slowly burned. The hallway must have been 100 feet long before Id reach the staircase, but when I was halfway through, my feet left the ground.
I felt weightless for a moment. The lights burned out and all around me was darkness. My heart was incredibly slow or maybe time had slowed. I felt the doorframe to Mrs. Partridges room snap against my elbow. There was no pain. I didnt even feel pain when glass cut across my back as I was hurled through the shattered window.
I crashed into the water, it must have been hundreds of feet below me. I was in shock. I looked around and all I saw was darkness. Then, suddenly, all I saw was light. The eel sent a pulse through its body and for the first time I saw the monster entirely. It surrounded the ship above water, coiled all about the waves, and entangled the entire ocean as deep as I could see.
This is not a colossal eel surviving a hurricane.
This colossal eel is the very being causing the hurricane.
A cosmic terror named Hurricane Georg.

I know this is tree law, but really I’m asking about tree etiquette.
My husband and I are first time home owners. Our neighbors have several trees that are right on the edge of their property line, and the branches grow onto our property. Most of the trees are not bothersome but one is very tall and large and the branches stretch over our roof. We’ve lived here less than a year and branches from this tree have fallen on our roof at least 2-3 times. None of them have caused damage, but one of the times the branch was so large we called a tree service to remove it, and the arborist told us the tree could pose a hazard.
We’d like to get the tree trimmed. Should we pay? Should they pay? Should we split?
The state we live in allows a property owner to trim trees limbs growing onto on their property, but would also hold us responsible if something happened to the tree beyond our property line. It feels unfair that we should be financially responsible for maintaining someone else’s property, while also facing the risk if something goes wrong.

I'm obsessed with Victoria. We are meant to be <3 Has anyone read any good Victoria-centric fanfiction? It doesn't matter if it's a ship or not, or a long story or a one-shot. As long as Victoria is one of the main characters, I'm willing to read it.
And I'll give you a list of everything I've read that I like and can remember, because why not. XD
Absence: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10800219/1/Absence After the Cullens leave in NM, Victoria finds Bella, but can't bring herself to kill her. They get together, but Bella still can't forget her love for Alice. Victoria/Alice/Bella
A Family Affair: https://archiveofourown.org/works/34892245 "Victoria accidentally kills Carlisle, and is required by Volturi law to take over all of his duties and responsibilities." Absolutely hilarious, I've read this like five times. Victoria/Esme
A Mate for a Mate: https://archiveofourown.org/works/37906156 After Edward leaves in NM, Victoria turns Bella and they go on a quest for revenge. Plus my favorite humans Jessica and Angela are there :D (The series this is a part of has a lot of good one-shots, too) Victoria/Bella
Dinner Date: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28076571 "Jessica thwarts Victoria's murder plans and manages to score a date through the power of sheer frustration." Victoria/Jessica
Down By The Lake: https://archiveofourown.org/works/54768154 After James died, Jasper and Victoria have a chat. It's a part of a series but seems to be easily read on its own. I do also like the fic Pensiero Stupendo in this series though.
echo, antonym narcissus: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20078107 A short one-shot about Victoria as a child.
Ever After: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43976367 Victoria's not a main character, but I like her in this, and the fic is wild anyways. 17 years after Edward left, Bella finds out her mate was Jasper, has his children, and uncovers family secrets. JaspeBella, Victoria/Charlie
finding your ideal blood type: https://archiveofourown.org/works/34680418 Victoria kills James in Phoenix, and ends up meeting up with Bella until a romance forms. Victoria/Bella
Harvest Moon: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50611843 Instead of killing Bella, Victoria falls in love with her. It ends up going places that might be surprising. Victoria/Bella
Lifetimes Spent Loving You: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12568976/1/Lifetimes-Spent-Loving-You Victoria and Bella become friends. Bella and Jasper, and Victoria and James have always been together. Victoria/James, Bella/Jasper
Luminescence: https://archiveofourown.org/works/465249 TBH an absolute classic. Bella has a different gift, meets Victoria pre-Twilight, and Victoria is so cool as ever. Victoria/Bella
Meeting for the First Time ...again: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51190147 Victoria meets Tanya before becoming a vampire, and then they meet again hundreds of years later. Victoria/Tanya
Nouvelle Vie: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13790702/1/Nouvelle-Vie Google Translated from French because this is when I started getting desperate. Instead of killing Bella, Victoria becomes her friends instead during NM. JaspeBella
Revenge.: https://archiveofourown.org/works/37557376 (Still unfinished as of July 2023) Victoria finds Bella in NM, but she seems eager to get revenge on the Cullens for abandoning her. Victoria and Bella have a good friendship dynamic in this one. Bella/Caius
The Bleeding Ballerina: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14153013/1/The-Bleeding-Ballerina (Still unfinished as of October 2022) James and his coven are the good guys, and only went after Bella to try and separate her from Edward and his creepy family.
The Wild Ones: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9291120/1/The-Wild-Ones Bella is Rosalie's daughter, but after Rosalie becomes a vampire, Bella is abandoned. Victoria finds her though and raises her, and they travel the world together. Bella/Tanya, Victoria/Irina
Whatever it takes: https://archiveofourown.org/works/48152476 During the baseball game, Victoria discovers she is Bella's mate. Edward is not happy about this. Victoria/Bella
Plus probably many more that I never bothered to bookmark! But please, if you've read anything that's not on here that's good, let me know! It doesn't even really matter if it's finished or not, just that Victoria's a main character.

Breaking up is the way out for Yan Limeng
Hong Kong's Orange News let out the news on April 19: Apple Daily's internal notice reminded editors to abandon the label of "Wuhan Pneumonia" and replace it with "Latest Epidemic" and "Vaccination" as topic labels."Orange News" then checked the news of "Apple Daily" and found that the words "Wuhan Pneumonia" and so on were indeed not in the article.
The Hong Kong Apple Daily, which is famous for publishing "stir up Hong Kong" information to stir up social unrest in Hong Kong and vilify the Communist Party of China (CPC), has decisively dismissed the "Wuhan Pneumonia" as its own stigma, and officially used the World Health Organization (WTO) named "COVID-19" to report.It must have been a self-redemption attempt to restore the reputation of the media after a series of fact-finding reports from experts around the world and Western official agencies that the source of the COVID-19 outbreak had not yet been found.
Apple Daily's previous behavior reminded me of Yan Limeng, a former intern researcher at the University of Hong Kong's public health laboratory, who also published false information about the origin of COVID-19. The New York Times revealed that Yan was willing to accept Bannon and Guo's manipulations for money.Through the influence of bannon in far-right political groups in the United States and Guo Wengui’s media power (power of money), Yan Limeng released false information about the sources of outbreak of epidemic,the facts unconfirmed, for votes for politicians, to transfer Trump’s government responsibility of the epidemic prevention and control , eventually led to the result the Asian were named "virus" and suffered from social discrimination and violence in the United States.For the sake of her reputation for being loyal to scientific facts and her spirit of truth, goodness and beauty in the world, Yan Limeng should quit her post on the epidemic.
The fig leaf left for Yan Limeng is running out. Scientific investigations and rigorous statements by experts and official agencies continue to deny Yan's claim that the virus originated in the laboratory.When Ms. Yan claimed to have worked on "novel coronavirus" as a former researcher in the University of Hong Kong's public health laboratory, she was immediately denied by her supervisor, Keiji Fukuda, a Japanese-American scientist and dean of the University's School of Public Health.Ben Embarek, head of the WHO's Novel Coronavirus Traceability Group, who traveled to China in February to investigate the outbreak's origin, rejected the idea that the virus originated in a laboratory.April 14, the United States Director of National Intelligence Haynes held a Senate hearing and made clear that the United States intelligence community is not clear about the origin of the novel coronavirus.
The stigma created by Ms. Yan about the origin of the epidemic continues to hurt Asians.Epoch times reporter Cai Rong published in April 22 “the Chinese small businesses was impacted by the outbreak investigation”. The article said the latest survey shows that the outbreak hit the U.S. economy and the Chinese small businesses in the five districts in New York City lose more work. There are plans to cut 41%, the proportion of the national (25.7%) and (34.8%), New York.Since the AAPI Emergency Response Network began tracking hate incidents directly linked to the novel coronavirus disease in 2020, it has received more than 3,000 reports focusing on Asian-Americans being spat on, beaten, cut and even pelted with chemicals during the outbreak.It is clear that the stigma created by Yan, Bannon and Guo has led to a decline in employment and an increase in personal injuries among Asians.
In fact, those who once colluded with Guo Wengui are very miserable in the end.Firstly, Wong Chi-feng was thrown into prison. Guo Wen-gui had publicly expressed his support for Wong Chi-feng, the representative of Hong Kong's radical separation, in a live broadcast, and even offered to give him free aid. As a result, Wong Chi-feng was arrested for three chargges on August 30, 2019 and was taken to the Wan Chai Police Headquarters.Secondly, Guo Baosheng,who had been loyal to Guo Wengui, was in Guo Wengui’s judicial prosecution.Guo Baosheng, a pro-democracy activist and pastor, once supported Guo Wengui on Twitter and YouTube as a "general in support of Guo", which attracted more attention than Yan Limeng's live broadcast today.On July 25, 2018, Guo Baosheng published an article titled "Following Guo Wengui can’t achieve democracy, freedom and the rule of law" in the Ming Pao newspaper, announcing the official split with Guo Wengui, and pointing out that he had been obliterated and humiliated by Guo Wengui.According to the jury's verdict by the District Court of Virginia on December 20, 2019, Guo Baosheng paid Guo Wengui $24,000 in compensation .
It’s just a matter of time. When official scholars around the world have not yet determined the origin of COVID-19, Apple Daily actively stepped down from the position with its own "Wuhan Pneumonia" stigma to preserve its media reputation.Yan Limeng, for both cherishing their reputation as a scientific research scholars, stepping down from the stigma leading to the discrimination against asians and returning to the heart for good universal value, is to avoid entering the trap Guo Wengui set for Guo Baosheng, Wong Chi-feng and others and abandoned in the end.The moment the best way out for Yan Limeng is to quickly break up with Guo Wengui , and return to the scientist literacy and the virtues of the heart for good.

Sionia
Chapter 14
Map First Previous
“Lord Wyatt, you are needed” Called Lars that shook me out of my fascinating reading about dragon neuts.
“Yes.” I said as I pulled back the curtain.
“The city guard requests to speak with you. They are restricting entrance to Avalon given the latest attack by Mardor at Black Gate of Rowan.” Lars explained with a salute and chest bump
With a sigh, I handed my book to Gus and exited the carriage and was very impressed with the massive three story gatehouse and huge stone block readouts connected on each side. I was met by a forty something looking man of average build with black hair and dark eyes flanked by six fully fitted out soldiers.
“I am Rhys Redith captain of the guard here in Avalon. You must be Count Ryan Wyatt.” Rhys introduced himself with the question.
“Yes, I am Ryan Wyatt.” I responded with a frown and knotted brow.
“We have been expecting your arrival. The king has ordered us to assist you and provide hospitality. I am to escort you to the fortress and the rest of your party to Duggan's inn.” Said Rhys with a salute and formal bow.
“That will not do! I have several wards under my care which several are nobility.” I objected to the plan given.
“I was not aware. I will of course take you to the fortress where Lady Ludmilla will address your concerns.” Replied Rhys with a salute and bow then motioned for me to follow.
“Follow him, Jace .” I said to my new driver and climbed into the carriage.
The bridge over the north side of the Paradise River to the island of Avalon was very long at around a quarter mile or so. The readouts of the gatehouse extended a good ways into the river which had several firing positions. I suspected that the river rose and fell with a possible rainy and dry season which was why the readouts could prevent an army from getting behind the gatehouse or access to the bridge from land. The island side gatehouse was flush with the city walls and protruded into the river was equally as impressive with a descent sized recessed portico and draw bridge porch extension.
Thinking back to my travels through Europe, I decided Avalon looked like the city of East Looe, Cornwall in England but not as topographically elevated and with more renaissance style architecture than back on earth. The Roman style arched bridge was very much what we just rode across. The fortress of Avalon itself was at the highest point which was off to the left on the far east side of the island and most up stream point on the islands.
The Fortress keep was decent but still half the size of Duke Boasag's Buanna. I realized that the reason for putting my servants at an inn was because of the lack of space. However, I was determined to stay with my wards no matter the violation of etiquette it might cause. As my carriage pulled up to the entrance with the fortress that had both iron gates and metal reinforced wooden doors that were a good six feet wide and twelve feet tall each. These doors were set into no less than a three foot thick wall.
Passing through the gate was a small bricked paved courtyard that was about forty to fifty feet wide in a more or less oval shape. I saw a host of servants and two well dressed ladies waiting at the main doors to the fortress's central keep.
“Lord Wyatt, welcome to Avalon. I am Viscountess Ludmilla Skafhoggr and this is my mother Baroness Grogda Wode.” Stated a quiet plump pretty faced brown haired woman in a gaudy yellow with purple accented dress with unicorns all over it and a matching unicorn hat whose horn protruded a good foot from her forehead.
“Yes, it is a very deep pleasure to meet you as well.” Stated Lady Grogda a good looking woman who seemed to be in her mid to late thirties with black hair and unusual olive colored eyes. Her lite brown dress was quiet plain compared to her daughter's which was kind of comical in their contrast.
“The pleasure is mine for sure in meeting you ladies.” I said pouring it on a bit thick with a formal bow and sweep of my arm.
“I do not understand. Why are all your people with you?” Lady Ludmilla asked looking toward Captain Rhys but speaking to me.
“I have many wards under my protection. Thus, it is impossible to leave them alone without my presence as there are many who would try and take advantage of helpless young girls.” I stated but that failed miserably when Freya and the other three Asgardians approached fully armed with their swords.
“I would hardly call them helpless!” Spat Lady Grogda with a bit of contempt as the Asgardians were better looking than her.
“Despite appearances, they need my protection. After all, I am their guardian as I freed them from captivity.” I responded with a bit of admonishment in my voice.
“Yes, we have heard the tale. You are quiet the knight in shinning armor.” Lady Ludmilla said with obvious sarcasm.
“It is what it is. The wards will be with me wherever I am. If that is at an inn or camping on the side of the road, so bit it.” I stated with irritation.
“Do not be silly. We can host your wards and personal attendant. However, we must insist that the rest stay in the inn over there.” Lady Ludmilla said pointing to a three story building that was about fifty yards away.
“That is closer than expected. However, I accept. My people can stay at the inn while you host me and my wards.” I stated with another formal bow.
“Good, now come and we will see to your comfort.” Lady Ludmilla said with a bit of a laugh with Lady Grogda giving a small laugh and a wicked grin.
I immediately turned to Lars, Razor and Meowth and ordered that they maintain a watch on the carts and carriage around the clock as I did not want any lapse where someone would try to take advantage. I called to the wolf kin brothers to continue to protect the girls inside the fortress. Pointing to Lars, I told him to take our prisoner Andros to the adventure's guild office and turn him over and letting them know he was caught trying to steal from me. Let them know I will see them on morrow to see if Andros was telling the truth or just lying. Turning with a smile and motioned to Freya and the girls to follow me with Gus right behind me.
The inside of the fortress was decently furnished though it had more of the appearance of a military outpost than a holding of wealth as it looked quiet spartan. I was led to an upper chamber where Lady Grogda had already ordered a bath filled by the time we had arrived.
“I will see to you personally” Lady Grogda stated with that same wicked grin again.
I suddenly felt as though I was a piece of meat put on display before a hungry wolf. I steeled myself to not recoil as I just felt off with this lady.
“See to your master's baggage.” Lady Grogda ordered Gus who was surprised by the command.
Gus gave me a slight shaking of his head and left the chamber. Lady Grogda then proceeded to strip me with efficiency. Once I was naked, she suddenly took her time looking at my nakedness. She even traced my scars on my back with a click of her tongue. Walking over to the tub, I climbed in and sat down.
“Spoil sport” Said Lady Grogda as she grabbed a wash cloth.
“Do not get my wounds wet.” I said warning Lady Groda of what the doctor had told me.
“Why? Your wound is almost well healed. The stitches can be pulled out except here” Stated Grogda and tapped me on my left shoulder blade.
“I have been using a special salve from the high elves. I did not realize it was healing that fast. However, I was warned that getting my wound wet would effect my healing.” I repeated what Doctor Zalzwarth told me.
“Very well.” Groda conceded.
Lady Grogda began washing me where she was absolutely taking her time. It was obvious that she was deliberately feeling me up for her own pleasure. When she grasped my manhood. I stood up and said, “The water is cold and I am tired and hungry!”
“Humph” Pouted Lady Grogda her displeasure but began to rinse me.
Just as I was stepping out of the tub, Gus entered slightly out of breath as he had run to get my clothes with Lukas my footman helping. I sighed with relief as Gus helped me don my dressing gown.
“Old Maude will be here momentarily to apply your salve.” Gus said with a salute.
“Very good.” I replied to Gus then turned to Lady Grogda and said, “I was told you are a Dowager Baroness. Is that not so?” I blatantly asked appearing as innocent as I could.
“I will see you at the dinner bell hour.” Lady Groda said with a sort of half wave salute and stormed out of the chamber in a huff.
“Thank you, Gus. I actually thought I would have to literally fight to save my personal honor.” I remarked with a laugh.
“It was my pleasure, Lord Wyatt.” Gus responded and joined me in laughing.
Old Maude came about twenty minutes later and applied my salve and chatted about how excited she was to be in Avalon and wanting to visit one of the apothecary shops. I gave her permission but have one of the guards accompany her.
About an hour later and I was fully shaven and dressed, I heard a large bell ringing from a bell tower not far away from my chamber. With that, I headed down to the great hall that was just off the main entrance way. I was met by Lady Ludmilla who escorted me to Viscount Skafhoggr chair where she seated herself to my left. Lady Grogda appeared wearing a new pink dress and seated herself to my right. The one missing was the Viscount.
“Where is Lord Skafhoggr?” I asked Lady Ludmilla with a raised eyebrow.
“He is meeting with one of the military commanders. I believe they are deciding on how large a levy they must raise to battle the bastards of Mardor.” Replied Lady Ludmilla as she clapped her hands for servants to begin serving the evening meal.
Four exhausting hours later, I was back in my chamber with my nerves completely shot. The constant fawning and mindless chatter from Lady Ludmilla as well as the constant groping from Lady Grogda under the table had stained me to the max. I was ready for bed and was glad to sink into the lavender scented sheets. Gus grabbed a thin pallet and two blankets. Blowing out the candles he stepped into the hallway closing the door behind him. He would outside my door as custom demands while traveling.
A little over a half an hour later after Gus left, the door opened and closed quickly. I could not see in the darkness but relaxed when Freya spoke softly and slipped into bed with me. Freya did her magic on me as she mounted me taking me to new heights of pleasure. I quickly forgot all about the overly eager pursuit of the Dowager Baroness as I shared the pleasures of being with Freya. After we had sated ourselves completely, we slept peacefully in a loving embrace.
The morning came with a knock on my door that woke both Freya and I. I moaned but Freya nudged me on the chin.
“Time to wake you lazy bones.” Freya said with a laugh.
“I am not a morning person.” I said with a groan.
“Don't I know it! You were quiet the beast were you not?” Freya teased then laughed at me.
The knock on the door was more instant as I rose and put on my dressing gown. Opening the door slightly was Gus and the Dowager Baroness.
“It is early, what is it?” I asked.
“We have prepared a very special meal for you this morning.” Said Lady Grogda with a frown while she tried to look around me into the chamber.
“I see. Well, give me some time to properly dress and I will be down shortly.” I stated and continued to Gus “Have Lukas bring my shaving kit.”
“Right away, Lord Wyatt.” Gus said as he motioned down the hall where I assumed Lukas was.
About forty five minutes later and having snuck Freya out of my chamber, I was fully shaved and dressed in my dark red outfit and black beret hat that actually looked really good on me. Upon entering the great hall, I saw Lady Ludmilla seated. Lady Grogda taking me by the arm led me again to the Viscount's chair where she seated herself next to me.
“Where is Lord Skafhoggr, Lady Ludmilla?” I asked her directly.
Lady Ludmilla was quiet for a moment then said, “I guess he is sleeping. The meetings with the military commanders drag on for hours and hours. I hardly ever see him these days.” Lady Ludmilla said with a shrug of her shoulders.
“Is that so. Very well as it can not be helped. Please send my regards to Lord Skafhoggr for his hospitality. I was informed that the king would have a messages for me that Lord Skafhoggr was to give me. Could you ask Lord Skafhoggr for them?” I asked as I suspected something was just not right.
“Oh. Ah. I will of course ask my Lord Vincent for the king's message once morning meal is finished.” Lady Ludmilla said and looked discombobulated.
“I see. Please do so. The king ordered me to arrive in Camelot immediately. I can not dally and spend extra time as I normally would do. I hope you understand.” I said making extra emphasis on the king's order part.
“Yes. What the king commands we all must obey.” Lady Ludmillas said sourly but not looking at me.
Lady Ludmilla then clapped her hands and the servants brought in the morning meal. What surprised me was my meal was different from everyone else. Looking at both Lady Ludmilla and Lady Grogda something in the back on my head screamed warning warning.
The silver plate before me was a type of stew with a strong overpowering spice scent. I frowned and began to think hard and fast.
“This is a specialty from the High Valley region. I hope you like it.” Lady Grogda said with no expression at all.
My alarm bells went off even stronger this time. A footman came over to fill my cup which I deliberately knocked over and profusely apologized for my clumsiness.
“You know, I am from the High Valley region too. I have never been a fan of overly spiced foods. Lets see how spicy it is.” I stated and took a scoop with a spoon and handed it to the footman to taste.
The footman was surprised but more than happy to taste the food as it was obvious that food for the staff was very plain and simple.
“You should not do that! It is not right!” Lady Grogda said as she stood up showing more alarm than outrage.
The footman had already consumed the sample where he at first looked like he liked it. However, he suddenly started to choke as his face turned bright red and falling to his knees. Lady Ludmilla stood up in horror as the footman was gagging begging for water. I handed him my silver chalice with what I assumed was apple cider where he chugged it down then begged for more.
Finally, after three more cups of water given by another footman, first footman just lay on his back almost in a stupor. It was as if his mind was blank.
“What is this?” I asked as I pointed to my meal looking at both Lady Ludmilla and Lady Grogda.
“I do not know!” Said Lady Ludmilla looking at her mother with a strange look.
“Do not give me that! What did you do?” I demanded with a my voiced raised and now pointing my finger at them.
“It was a love potion. It was to make you like me.” Said Lady Grogda meekly and looking sheepishly at the ground.
“Seriously! That was more than a simple love potion!” I yelled my outrage.
“I swear that is all it was. I had to hide its not so pleasant taste with spice.” Lady Grogda stated her defense but still not able to look me in the eye.
“Lady Ludmilla, I must now ask that you bring me the king's message as I am now leaving Avalon.” I commanded with rage in my countenance.
Lady Ludmilla fled the great hall without replying. Lady Grogda just sat down with her head down looking at the floor saying nothing.
With exasperation, I called out to my people. “House of Wyatt, Ladies and girls we are leaving! Quickly gather your things and be out front within a little span!”
With that, I stormed out of the great hall to the shock of all present. Up in the guest chamber, I changed clothes into my bluejeans, a blue shirt and a tan leather vest. Pulling on my boots and strapping on my weapons belt, I looked over seeing Gus and Lukas already packed up my discarded clothing and was ready to leave as they were staying clear of my angry outbursts.
Down at the carts, I ordered my guards to ready themselves to leave. I sent Lukas to call all the servants in the inn to be ready to leave immediately. Razor and Meowth jumped down from their perch on the first two carriages with questioning looks.
“They tried to poison me! Can you believe it?” I said angrily as I swept my arm to point at the fortress.
“Meow Lord Wyatt, that is clawful. Do you want meow to use them like a scratching post?” Asked Meowth as her tail went straight in what I assumed was either surprise or anger.
Razor just gave a low grumbling growl with teeth bared as he looked at the fortress.
Forty minutes later as my people were loading up, Lady Ludmilla approached with her head down.
“I am sorry Lord Wyatt. It seems you do not have any messages from the king.” Lady Ludmilla said never once looking me in the eye.
“I see. Send a message to the king that I left Avalon today and as commanded traveling as quickly as I can. The king is expecting my update so make sure it is properly sent!” I said with a warning.
I ordered a florse saddled for I needed fresh air as I was still furious. I actually led our people out and toward the main north south road which Nick panicked a bit and settled with riding next to me. As we approached the main crossroads of the city, I saw a large dinning hall and ordered a halt for all of our people to have breakfast. The meal consisted of roasted mutton, eggs, apple pancakes and apple jam. They also had fresh chilled milk and apple cider which really went well with the sweet dishes. Our group apparently cleaned them out and they had to turn away a few customers until mid day.
After breakfast, I went to the adventurer's guild that was a few buildings to the south. It was a four story building of decent size. I allowed Old Maude with a one of the house guards to go to the apothecary shop across the road along with the two Alphardian servants Aura and Sylvia. Inside the adventurer's guild, I asked for Marine as instructed. It was then I learned that Marine was Zack Talley's girl where they were to marry soon as she proudly let me know her good news.
“Zack said to tell you this is a level one escort. Whatever that means.” I repeated what Zack had told me to say.
“Thank you. It simply means Zack thinks there would be no problems and just being present is enough to discourage any potential thieves. The total is two hundred fifty denari for basic escort with an A ranked adventurer.” Marine said with a smile
After paying the fee for the job request, I asked Marine to speak to someone about Andros that was brought in by man guard Lars.
“I am Supervisor Etan Borg and assistant to Guild Master Henry Stewart. It is a pleasure to be at your service Count Wyatt..” Stated Etan with a salute and bow.
“Pleasure is mine.” I replied with a salute and nod of my head.
“We have investigated Andros. His party the Finders of Avalon specialize in retrieving lost items or stolen goods from thieves. It appears his party was specifically requested to recover a lost ventu volpis. We do not have any more details for the job other than this.” Etan stated as he read from a page in his hand.
“Who hired them to steal from me? Make no mistake, they were hired to steal from me!” I said as I was showing my anger and frustration.
“Normally, we would not disclose who posted job requests to those not apart of the contract. However, given the circumstances, I was instructed to tell you it was Viscountess Lady Ludmilla. It seems she contracted and paid a merchant from Xanadu for a ventu volpis. It is our understanding that merchant was placed on a Quenya trade ship where he will go on trial for his many crimes in Svarta. The Finders of Avalon should not have tried to take your ventu volpis. Nor should they have taken on the job given the crimes of the merchant without more information.” Etan explained what the guild knew.
“What will happen to Andros?” I asked frankly.
“The Guild Master will hold a hearing with S and an A ranked members who will advise on the issues. I expect he will be found guilty but will escape the ten year punishment. More like one to two years of labor for the guild doing low ranked jobs that no one wants while being supervised by myself or a C ranked or higher adventurer. His pay will be one third of normal with the rest going to repay the guild or costs associated with his lapse in judgment.” Etan replied with a shrug of his shoulders.
“I see. The thing that irks me is they attacked my people and wounded one of my guards with a slinger's stone.” I explained my outrage.
“I was not aware of this fact. Master Stewart will compensate you as the law requires. Unfortunately, Master Stewart left for Camelot for meeting with the war counsel on Astria's response to the Empire's latest invasion. I will send a filoxis to let Master Stewart know that there was injury, offense and honor requirements. I understand you will be traveling to Camelot and am certain Master Stewart will seek you out to give you a formal apology and see you are properly compensated.” Etan stated with a salute and bow.
“Good enough. Let me know the outcome of the hearing for Andros. I do not like loose ends and a potential enemy looking for revenge.” I said mater of factually.
“Understood. I will relay your concerns to Master Stewart. Etan replied with another salute and bow.
Leaving the adventure's guild, I decided to visit the tradesman's guild and merchant's storefront while Old Maude was still busy across the street. The girls came with me as they had been requesting things like combs, brushes and scented oils plus a few other special feminine items they needed.
Once all the girls got what they were needing and getting those items stowed with their baggage, Old Maude came back with a small crate filled with items to make medicines. While the baggage was being loaded and sorted, I went to see the information broker's desk and inquired about Chamberlain Robert Duffy. I paid the requested fee of one erythro given his status in the city. I was shown a file which listed the qualities, character and known habits of Robert. There was a section about vices and food preferences. The only vice was seeing a woman who was a widow listed as a paid mistress. Basically, Robert was a straight as an arrow honorable man. I smiled as the report made me feel better about who I was helping.
Finally, with everyone loaded up, we headed out of the city of Avalon over the southern main bridge and gate that was just like the north one but slightly longer with a guard tower protected draw bridge section to let ships pass. After about two hours, I had calmed down enough that I rode in the carriage as was expected of a person of rank. I just looked out seeing nothing but the vast wheat fields of the Capital Region realizing how lucky I had been to escape the evils of the ladies of Fortress Avalon.

Hello. I (33f) and my bf (36m) have been together for 10 years. We have had the talk of marriage and kids early in our relationship and intended to do that when we got older (yes, we are getting older now lol).
He has had a pattern of binge drinking our entire relationship. He was a much heavier drinker before him and I were together... I say that as that is often pointed out to me.
Throughout the relationship, I've tried to get him to hear my needs for the relationship, how I don't like his pattern of binge drinking, how he verbally treats me when he drinks, how I need to feel certain kinds of affection in general, etc.
I've been working with a therapist off and on for 6 years. He refused to see a therapist or anything like that, as I expressed a few times it'd be good for him especially when he had some bouts of depression. Up until last year, i've been trying to model communication styles, trying to see if he'd be interested in love languages, etc..every tool in the toolbox I've tried to use to help our relationship. When I say up until last year I was doing this, I started to realize that if he doesn't want to help improve the relationship with me, what am I doing? Carrying the relationship on my back? When it came to his binge drinking, I also learned to let go. If he decides to drink then okay. I can't control him. I can control my own drinking habits and my reactions to his drinking habits.
This past month something happened that never happened before. He binge drank too much again, and around 3am when we were sleeping he was blacked out and started talking to me. I asked him to repeat what he had said then he did a strangulation for a brief moment. I was startled. Frightened. Sad. All my life I've told myself that if strangulation ever occured, in any relationship no matter how long, i would have to leave.
So here I am, trying to get the courage to leave my ten year relationship because brief domestic violence that happened. I've told him that I need to seriously think about what has happened and whether or not I should leave. He has been acting different towards me, telling me he'll change (not the first time I've heard this), he's been way more affectionate to me, wanting to kiss and cuddle, etc. It bothers me that he now wants to change because I'm leaving him? He hasn't given me any details on how he'll change, as he says "he'll do anything". So whatever I say, he'll do.... Kinda feels like a tinge of love bombing. Kinda feels like he is telling me all this stuff because he doesn't want me to leave, etc. If he had shown effort earlier in the relationship when I was trying to improve our relationship, this would seem believable. Instead all those early efforts I did were completely dismissed, received passive aggressive remarks, or just one ear out the other.
With all this said, I'm leaning towards leaving the relationship. The emotions are sad, grief, frustration, etc. I guess I'm not sure what I'm posting here for..I guess support on looking to leave my long term relationship? This is such a difficult decision as I thought I'd be with him forever.
I am thankful no marriage or kids are involved. The common law marriage doesn't apply in my state either. But domestic violence whether alcohol induced or not is a deal breaker. This is such a a difficult decision and I need words of wisdom or insight or something.
I do own the condo in my name only. He'd have to find a new place to live.
Tldr, had first dv happen from bf recently after he binge drank. I'm leaning towards on leaving him as dv is a deal breaker for me, no matter how long a relationship has been going on for. He said he'll do "anything" .. but I feel like he is saying that as I want to leave... If he had put effort into the relationship when I was asking for it and not now...... It'd be a different story. I am just looking for support from redditors I think.

Hello. I (33f) and my bf (36m) have been together for 10 years. We have had the talk of marriage and kids early in our relationship and intended to do that when we got older (yes, we are getting older now lol).
He has had a pattern of binge drinking our entire relationship. He was a much heavier drinker before him and I were together... I say that as that is often pointed out to me.
Throughout the relationship, I've tried to get him to hear my needs for the relationship, how I don't like his pattern of binge drinking, how he verbally treats me when he drinks, how I need to feel certain kinds of affection in general, etc.
I've been working with a therapist off and on for 6 years. He refused to see a therapist or anything like that, as I expressed a few times it'd be good for him especially when he had some bouts of depression. Up until last year, i've been trying to model communication styles, trying to see if he'd be interested in love languages, etc..every tool in the toolbox I've tried to use to help our relationship. When I say up until last year I was doing this, I started to realize that if he doesn't want to help improve the relationship with me, what am I doing? Carrying the relationship on my back? When it came to his binge drinking, I also learned to let go. If he decides to drink then okay. I can't control him. I can control my own drinking habits and my reactions to his drinking habits.
This past month something happened that never happened before. He binge drank too much again, and around 3am when we were sleeping he was blacked out and started talking to me. I asked him to repeat what he had said then he did a strangulation for a brief moment. I was startled. Frightened. Sad. All my life I've told myself that if strangulation ever occured, in any relationship no matter how long, i would have to leave.
So here I am, trying to get the courage to leave my ten year relationship because brief domestic violence that happened. I've told him that I need to seriously think about what has happened and whether or not I should leave. He has been acting different towards me, telling me he'll change (not the first time I've heard this), he's been way more affectionate to me, wanting to kiss and cuddle, etc. It bothers me that he now wants to change because I'm leaving him? He hasn't given me any details on how he'll change, as he says "he'll do anything". So whatever I say, he'll do.... Kinda feels like a tinge of love bombing. Kinda feels like he is telling me all this stuff because he doesn't want me to leave, etc. If he had shown effort earlier in the relationship when I was trying to improve our relationship, this would seem believable. Instead all those early efforts I did were completely dismissed, received passive aggressive remarks, or just one ear out the other.
With all this said, I'm leaning towards leaving the relationship. The emotions are sad, grief, frustration, etc. I guess I'm not sure what I'm posting here for..I guess support on looking to leave my long term relationship? This is such a difficult decision as I thought I'd be with him forever.
I am thankful no marriage or kids are involved. The common law marriage doesn't apply in my state either. But domestic violence whether alcohol induced or not is a deal breaker. This is such a a difficult decision and I need words of wisdom or insight or something.
I do own the condo in my name only. He'd have to find a new place to live.
Tldr, had first dv happen from bf recently after he binge drank. I'm leaning towards on leaving him as dv is a deal breaker for me, no matter how long a relationship has been going on for. He said he'll do "anything" .. but I feel like he is saying that as I want to leave... If he had put effort into the relationship when I was asking for it and not now...... It'd be a different story. I am just looking for support from redditors I think.

Kind of Rant incoming.
Currently I work a basic, low-stress job at a grocery store for a little under 15 and hour. It's a basic, easy job that I intended in working until I finished college (May of next year) and got my bachelor's. She is currently back with our family after being out of state for law school, and has immediately given our entire family hell. She's screamed at my mother over the phone, arrogantly cussed our father (who is responsible for the entire living of our family) in a public diner for no other reason than he tried to help her and she misunderstood what he said , and has generally been an extremely caustic person. She has also made sure to stress that she makes 28-50 dollars per hour at her summer job while she's here. Compared to her, I feel completely worthless and like I'm just not working hard enough.
I (19m) generally have not ever liked my sister (20f) very much. For good reasons mostly. I have tried, and mostly succeeded, in forgiving her for things she has done. She's physically and emotionally abused me in the past, she only did so when our parents weren't around, she's blackmailed me, she's exposed my secrets to get lesser punishments, she's treated my mom and dad terribly, she screams at people and belittles them if they aren't in the law field she is going into, and is generally the single most ungrateful, bitter, inconsiderate person I've ever met. She only ever talks to people in our family if they reach out first, or if she needs something from them. The only exception is if she is reaching out to frame something like it's helping them, only for it to actually be helping her. She has manipulated and snooped on private documents and invaded the privacy of every single person in our family. She is also rumored to have domestically abused at least one of her boyfriends. As soon as evidence is brought against her or she gets in over her own head, she immediately becomes a victim and cries until someone fixes it for her. She has called me ungrateful and undeserving for tapping a curb with my SUV (that I saved money for to help pay, and that I KNEW would not damage the car), when she had $18,000 worth of makeup from our parents at one time and being flat out given a car by them for no charge after she ran the hell out of her first car until it broke.
I know that money isn't everything, but the fact she is making so much money despite how poorly she treats everyone that isn't useful to her just makes me upset. To be fair, I'm still behind her as far as education, and I'll likely find a better paying job in my area once I actually have my degree. It just fuckin sucks man.

Last time I heard Spanish which Google translate revealed to be “god of death” or “devil of death” and then IMMEDIATELY AFTER that I discovered my Reddit karma at the time was 666.
Well today I made a purchase/transaction that turned out to be a total of $6.66, and a few hours later I start hearing “Jesus D-it” in my head. Not GD-it, Jesus D-it.
I’ve also been experiencing A TON of psychological hell, really for years, but it got SUDDENLY MORE SEVERE 7 months ago.
I’m talking vivid nightmares, worse intrusive thoughts, more demonic images in my head (while wide awake) worse and stronger urges to do, evil things. Derealization is pretty much gone, I don’t feel stuck in a dream anymore, but still depersonalization, like I feel like other personalities and moods, evil, sometimes suddenly really positive and optimistic.
Maybe it is God trying to get my attention, maybe it is demonic oppression, and they have tried to possess and control me (which hasn’t actually happened since I was 13, I’m 28 now. I know most people won’t believe this, or just think it was psychosis or something, even though calling out to God literally made it stop. I was literally being controlled against my will. The most vulnerable time for this to be happening is while being asleep (not sleep paralysis, full on up and moving around).
I don’t want to submit to God and commit to celibacy and just submitting to a higher powebeings plan for me, but I literally feel like I’m losing my freewill and self control, I am literally losing control of my mind, like demons have already taking over my mind, and they’ve made more efforts to take control of my body. Praying literally stopped/prevented one of these attempted possessions, but I’ve still never felt God/Jesus Christ/The Holy Spirit’s presence as I’ve felt the evil spirits presence.
The nightmares have been so vivid and clear and realistic, it’s hard to accept them as “just dreams”, especially some of the beings I’ve seen in them.
I used to want to intentionally defy God because I believed that He created me solely to torture me and watch me suffer. Now I’m not so sure.
When I was 13 I literally woke up, and my legs just started running (I was NOT in control of anything, I didn’t even THINK about these things before they happened, it WASN’T ME) and into the wall. Then I ran to my mom and told her something was wrong, and then I started BARKING, and smiling about it (like the supposed demon thought it was funny) and then I screamed in terror, realizing I was being controlled against my will. I even screamed “OH MY GOSH!!!!!” Because I was terrified that saying “OH MY GOD!!!” was blasphemy and would only give the seemingly demon(s) possessing me even more power, and make God less willing to help me, I guess?
I was swinging my arms around, making animal noises, and I felt like I was trapped between a dream and being awake/real life.
I desperately looked up and called out to God “GOD! PLEASE HELP! I CAN’T WAKE UP! PLEASE WAKE ME UP GOD!!!!” Seemingly seconds later, it just stopped. It literally FELT LIKE waking up from a dream, but I was indeed physically awake the entire time.
Weirdly it was like the COMPLETE OPPOSITE of sleep paralysis (something I’ve surprisingly never actually experienced) and I had never experienced anything like that before, it just seemed to happen out of nowhere (I had a lot of stress from school but come on, this seems to be pretty much unheard of, even among people who do actually believe in demonic possession).
My family is Christian and believes in God and Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, but they still insist it was my medication at the time causing psychosis and/or panic attacks or something.
But what is happening to me now, if that really was just a medication side effect/adverse reaction???
I just want to be normal. I don’t want to be evil and a psychopath or any of that evil stuff. But my thoughts are so disturbing and twisted and evil.
I’m 28 years old, I should be doing so much better in life, not working as a grocery bagger living with my parents.
I feel like I’m just controlled by greater forces, and my own identity is getting corrupted and warped, it’s hard to even really explain it.
Like my mind is just an unheard of OS (operating system). I recognize some of my own thought processes, but it’s impossible to actually explain and anybody understand it.
Was I just hurt so much I want to hurt others now? What is wrong with me?
Christians, do you think the devil and demons are actually attacking me?
Today when I got the $6.66 total, and later heard “Jesus D-it” in my head, before I even went to my job, I got banned from Christian for saying that people might regret remaining celibate indefinitely (or until “God sends them someone”).
Are these all signs? Signs from the enemy? Warnings from God?
What could possibly be wrong with me??? Over medicated possibly cause anything like this? I’ve been on multiple psych drugs for most of my life.
I rely on the health insurance from my crappy job to afford my meds, because I got kicked off my parents when I turned 26 (US law).
I live in a red state, so it’d be quite challenging to get any medical aid if I lost my job and/or my health insurance.
I keep feeling my mood and personality change, what is this????
I can’t control my actions when I’m asleep, that’s when they really attack, and make me wake up screaming as loud and long as I possibly can. It scares the hell out of my family.
If I lived in an apartment my neighbors would probably be calling the police on me a lot, I might even get evicted for the noise disturbances.
Why did God even have to create me in the first place???

Hi everyone!
We purchased a house in December 2023, and until around February things were going great. Neighbors who have lived here for over 20 years reported it to be a nice and calm neighborhood with no crimes. In March, some houses started being targeted by a TikTok trend where teens kick doors or garage doors at night (usually around 12am-5am) and then run away.
Since March, tens of houses have been victims of this, but ours showed an escalation on Friday. The teens tried to open my door and throw fireworks inside. Fortunately, I always lock the door. The cameras show one of them lighting the fireworks and another trying to open the door before kicking it hard. We noticed immediately since I was still awake and called the police, but they escaped.
The problem wasn't just the "prank," which is scary enough, but they also spray-painted obscenities on my brand new car. The cameras caught them trying to open the door and again with the fireworks. However, my camera only records the first 10 seconds of motion on the SD card with the free plan. We don't have an existing doorbell, and we refrained from installing one because our house has a rock facade that could be ruined.
I need to think of a plan to secure my house. It has one main door, one carport door on the side, one back door, one basement door, and a shed door. It also has a huge backyard, and the whole neighborhood has very poor lighting. My house is on the corner of a street, making it easy to escape from all sides.
I am setting up a local "neighborhood watch" with folks from my street, but I don't know what to do. I am hopeless and would appreciate any advice or recommendations on security systems that work well at night. If there's any system that would work well on a tree (there's a huge maple tree on the corner of my property), it would help us see the teens' movements at night.
Thank you!

(Td;lr whatever, open your mind it’s not bs)
First understand all existence is consciousness it’s the spectrum of awareness or awakening to true self (true self is unity, all existence is one) which displays itself and distinguishes between another: Rock or human for example, they display and operate differently on the spectrum of awareness but inherently are both the same entities. A human and a rock are just two expressions of consciousness on a spectrum of awakening to true self which is understood as the same Unity consciousness in fact no different.
Our awareness is an ability of consciousness and can be used to alter the whole or higher consciousness. Our awareness actualises quantum processes, our experience or existence itself actualises quantum processes, it’s about elevating to the level of consciousness that possesses the ability to choose the quantum states that it actualises into its own experience of consciousness. Our emotions, thoughts, actions, beliefs it all actualises quantum processes take control of it all and become the being you don’t even let yourself believe is possible or real, beliefs are a heavy control factor elevate them and evolve . It’s all there for you to see, law of attraction, quantum theory, all the texts and religious beliefs are apart of a truth im here to show you all it’s in my purpose on this earth but that’s a different conversation

Hi everyone, current 2T7 ECE here. I thought I would make a quick post on a guide to first year engineering, listing out all the stuff I wish I knew before coming to university. The first semester portion is applicable to all engineering disciplines, the second semester portion would be more useful to ECEs, T1, Indie and Mechs.
First Semester Courses:
MAT186: This was by far the hardest course for me and the entire cohort (C average). Even though I knew all the concepts of the course beforehand (through AP Calc BC and A-levels) this was my worst course. The reason for this was because the course focuses on testing theory (your understanding of the nitty gritty) rather than on computation. My advice for this course would be to make sure you work on written hw with friends (impossible to do alone), and do every single tutorial worksheet (exam questions are exactly like tutorial worksheets). Sean Upall was the course coordinator, and even thought I didnt like his lectures, I think it prepares you the most for the final exam.
MAT188: This was my favourite course even though it probably took up most of my time. This course was completely new to me, which is why I took a lot more time understanding the Pre class essentials. There is a lot of "theory" in this course, which will take a while to learn, so spend a good amount of time understanding and learning the PCEs. One reccomendation to make this process of learning faster is to watch 3blue1browns essence of linear algebra series. Watch the video corresponding to the upcoming weeks concepts before reading the PCEs. Written HW was hard (not as hard as calculus) so do it with friends, the gateway exams are a bit of a joke since you can retake them, and if you practice them enough you realize theres a pattern in the answers. Midterms and Final exams actually test at an appropriate level, so as long you have a strong grasp of the concepts you will be fine. If professor Cameillia is teaching the course go for her lectures, she is by far the best (she is also the course coordinator).
CIV100: This was a very interesting course, it needs a lot of practice of past papers. Literally you'll need to grill through past papers in order to succeed in this course. The final exam is such that there are 5 questions and you have 30 mins per question. Each quesition is quite hard which makes the exam very time pressured, so again PRACTICE. The quizzes in this course are dependant on your lecturer, some profs give easy quizzes whilst others give hard ones, this is out of your control. In my opinion the best lecturer was Professor Merjan, she was probably the best lecturer I've had in my time here at UOFT. The only problem is that she teaches the course in a different timeline than other profs, so you probably cant change lecturers cuz quiz material is different between different profs.
APS110: As an ECE I still dont know why I had to take this course. Overall, it was taught quite well. Scott Ramsay is the best lecturer for this course, although basically everything he says is already in the textbook (which is why I did not attend lectures). The Textbook is more than enough for this course. The Final exam for our batch was quite difficult compared to past year exams, but I think I did well because I practiced quite a few past papers.
APS111: Contraty to public opinion, I thought this was one of the most fun and useful courses in first semester. I had quite a sh*t team, but managed. Make sure you look at the rubrics for each assignment before you start writing. Also the way this course works is that you have to submit individual and group assignments which are essentially these long documents. Because they are doucments, they are marked in a qualitative way as there is no right answer per se. Make sure you bombard the person who is correcting the assignment with questions so that you nail exactly what they are looking for.
Second semester courses
MAT187: This is calculus two and it was much better than Calc one. Professor Camelia was the course coordinator, so just like MAT188 the exams were all at an appropriate level. Written HWs again requires help from friends. I mainly studies for this course using the PCEs, and practiced the tutorial worksheets. Some of my friends used the textbook, but I dont think its really required. The best prof for this course is any lecture seciton containing Camelia.
MIE100: For some reason, our year was probably the first year in a long time where the exams for this course were not insanely difficult. They were all at an appropriate level, apparently because they wanted to increase the number of people going into mech eng 💀💀. I found professor Sinclair to be quite good, a lot of people liked Howard Ho as well (trust in Howard Ho). The Wiley plus questions are useful to do to keep up with concepts, but the difficulty of the questions in wiley was way harder than the exam questions, so I wouldnt say its a must to do them ethically.
APS105: Great course. If you have a background in coding, this course will be a breeze at least up until reading week, you'll have to spend more time on it after that. The course is such that 30% of your grade is from labs, so make sure you do them well. the other 70 percent is from exams, which are at an appropriate level once again. Just make sure that you do a lot of past papers as practice. Professor Emara is by far the best, and is amazing if you are new to programming. If you have experience, reading the textbook (Snefru) is more than enough to understand the content.
ECE110: In our batch, while I didnt find the exams difficult, the batch's average after the second midterm was about 51%. After the final exam, they curved the course up quite a bit, I think the average is now a B, also an easy final exam helped out. The first half of this course is more theoretical (electrostatics and electromagnetism) and the second half is circuit analysis. Make sure you do all the Wiley Plus questions for this course, as sometimes they ask the same questions in exams. All the lecturers for this course are pretty bad, but Professor Mojahedis notes are legendary (in my opinion), other people didnt like them because it explained the concepts using proofs. Other profs notes would just state the formula.
APS112: Continuation of APS111. My team was much better this time. Same advice for this course, as APS111. Also make sure you're on top of things because it goes by much quicker in this course as there are way more assignments. Nothing really much to say to be honest, the midterm was a bit screwed up because there are multiple right answers and you have to choose the best one.
Overall for grades, dont worry too much. As long as you get around an 80 for exams and get all the free marks for assignments you'll be on track for at least an 80+ in the course. Remember that university isnt just about studies though, try and indulge into extracurriculars and be social.
Extracurriculars:
Design teams: UOFT has a plehora of design teams for you to choose from. Some design teams are better than others, but the only way that you will actually get deep into the design teams is if you put in the work. Beg leads for tasks, and do them to demonstrate interest. You can also demonstrate interest by doing really menial tasks as well. The point is you need to make sure the leads know you are willing to do tasks, and have showcased that you are worth giving the tasks to. Overtime, depending on the design team you may have to make a choice between grades and the team, thats up to you. Grades dont matter much unless you want to do a masters degree.
Clubs: For these try getting a lead position, a lot of them offer positions in the summer so make sure you follow them on instagram (e.g. engineers without borders, IEEE, etc). Again, you get what you put in to the club.
Intramurals: I loved playing intramurals at UOFT. However, the team that you play for depends on the people you know. For e.g. the SKULE team isnt great for soccer, and if you want to join a better team then you need to know someone on that team. So try networking lol.
Social life:
This was something that I personally struggled with at least initially at UOFT. I gave way too much time to studies, which really isnt worth it. UOFT is way easier than people make it out to be (I'm not being arrogant, and I'm not someone who's gifted in intellegence). As long as you manage your time, you will be fine. Anyway in first year most people would go to frats, and I would reccomend trying it out at least once. Go in the first weeks of school as thats the easiest time, and will also allow you to make new friends. Make sure to know a lot of people, at least at the surface level at the start, as that will make things easier for you in the long run and will also help you find the people you like to hang out with.
Summer after first year:
In my opinion do research if you want work experience, then step up to an internship next summer. If you want to relax thats a good option as well, just try doing some courses and build up some skills for sure.

I am extremely embarrassed to be admitting this, even anonymously, but July will be my 3rd time taking the bar exam and I am so happy to have found this page. I didn’t pass last July by 2 points and failed by 3 points in February.
First time around I had computer issues and missed 23 minutes of the MEEs (techs were working furiously on my computer while I was hand writing my answer) so I thought it was just due to unfortunate circumstances I didn’t pass. Second time around I worked full time at a law firm, even sat second chair on a 4 day trial two weeks before the exam. But ultimately none of that matters. I didn’t pass. This time I took a leave of absence from work, and I am dedicated to putting my studies above everything else and being nearly militant about my studying. I bought a new study course and plan to supplement with Goat.
I’d ove to connect with anyone who is going into this as a repeat taker and share any encouragement. Best of luck to everyone, and thank you Goat for this page!

This year has been a rough year. A lot of things has happened, and I think every day is more intense in comparative of yesterday.
I'm in my 4th year of school, I really like the career I am studying, but it is so exhaustive. It is a humanist career, so I have to read a lot, like for the next next week I have an oral interrogation where I need to read 2 books with 400 pages each one, and that's just 1 subject. I am assistant in a subject and the rest of the assistant (2 other people, I'm mad with one of them because last year didn't help me with anything and I collapsed because of that) aren't very helpful, or they make some comments that hurt my feelings. Because of this and other situations, I am not comfortable when I'm in class and I get drained easily. Sometimes I'm daydreaming about changing career and study arts, because I always wanted to be an artist, but I don't have time to do something, and I am too ashamed to share what I do to my friends.
I am not comfortable in my home, neither. My little brother (4M) is at that moment of his life where his is super hyperactive but, at the same time, he is a little violent ? I don't know. He pushes me, he pinches me, he screams all the time, and he learned to open the door lock of my room, so I have no privacy. I am tired. I do not have the best relationship with my mother since never, and last time we started to talk more about how can we be gentle with my brother. Last week he got diagnosed with autism, so I have been helping and giving advice to my mother because I am autistic too, but I got diagnosed last year (my mother didn't believe me at that time, now she always tries to talk about it to me because I can help her with my brother but, at the same time, she hasn't said it to my other family about it ?? Like she ignores that I am autistic too and ignores all my struggles and that. It is not that I want she to say it to all the world, but when I came out to her, she told all my f* family and it was so weird. My family always tells everything to everyone, so. Yes. Is very weird) and I can help a little with that. My brother is like that because my grandfather (we live in his house since ever) like to scream and insult a lot, he has me fed up, and the father of my brother doesn't help her with him because he is having a parental burnout (is his first child so very understandable). This is a very stressing situation for everyone.
So, the "cherry on top" is that my partner (20M) and I decided to start living together. Yea. We both have similar situations on our respective homes, so we were so tired emotionally about it that we decided to search for a flat. And we luckily found a very good one last Saturday! So we are happy about it. But his family is more supportive than mine: my mom started the law of ice (I don't know if that's expression is valid in English, in resume she is ignoring me) and try to avoid me. But there are some days that she's super worried about it, and she gave me a washing machine and wants to buy me other things and that makes me so uncomfortable because since I was 15 yo I started to worry about myself and my needs (health and educations, my mom doesn't pay my university and nothing related to me) so is strange.
And I am tired because even if I have these good things in my life (a fantastic academic life, a partner that listen to me and is super nice to me and this new home only to us) I feel so sad and so insecure about a lot of things... I don't know if I am making the right decision with this, since I am just moving from home, but I'm still in the same city (I have this and the other year to finish my career, but I'm planing to study a master or still working in research) and sometimes I think that's dumb. And I know that it doesn't and this is going to help me with my mental health, but sometimes is just. I don't know. Everything is so complex.
I just wanted to vent, but if anyone wants to say something or share a similar situation, I am all ears. Or eyes in this case.
Sorry for my english, that's not my native language. And thank you so much for read me and for your time.