My (35M) ex best friend (36M) wants to sit down and talk in person about why we’re no longer friends two years later ahead of our mutual friends wedding in a few months. I haven’t been able to talk about why I walked away until recently. For clarity, I removed them from all of my social media except for WhatsApp and they didn’t reach out after I did so. I’ve written the below to read to them when we meet. Is it too much or should I be completely honest? Names changed for privacy.
“I think for you to understand why I did what I did, I need you to understand where it all started and where it’s all coming from. What I’m about to tell you is from my own point of view and I understand your perception of these situations at the time and now will more than likely differ.
I told you a couple of years ago in passing after having a few drinks that I had had a crush on you. That was putting it mildly. As for a long time I had very strong romantic feelings for you and I would say I had fallen in love with you.
I had developed a crush on you earlier in our friendship and the longer we stayed friends, the more intense my feelings started to develop.
When you went through one of the worst things I think anyone could go through, I thought I could shield you from the hurt you were going through and would continue to go through if I threw my whole being into being there for you, irrespective if you ever would feel the same about me. During this time, I felt our dynamic shift that beyond a friendship. Before you and Taylor broke up, for a series of months I felt you investing yourself emotionally in me and it felt that I had become someone or somewhere for you to have the emotional outlet you no longer had with Taylor. I don’t know and I don’t think this was done consciously by you. I think it was a result of circumstance.
After you and Taylor broke up, I clutched on to the sliver of hope that maybe this would be my time. If I waited, let you move on and continue to be there for you like I had been for so long, that maybe one day you’d turn to me and tell me what I wanted to hear. And then within a few weeks you told me you had started to see Ben. I remember the exact moment you told me so vividly, because for the first time in such a long time, I felt my heart break. A few minutes later I walked out of bar and hid in the car park and cried for as long as I could without raising suspicion as to where I was gone and I slapped my best friend face and personality back on.
Over the following 10 months or so, I felt you push me further and further away. The closeness we once had was starting to fade away. I had to try adapt to what our friendship was now going to be and also try move on from my feelings for you. Our time spent together went from what felt like constant to almost non existent. I also felt like Ben took a dislike to me, this left me apprehensive of being around you together, again this is my perception and may be different to you or Ben even. To be honest, I didn’t want to be around you two together because I didn’t want to have to see Ben get from you what I wanted.
When I started to date Josh it felt like I had started to move on from what I felt for you. You were no longer the person that occupied my mind the most. I started to feel happy again and I felt like I could be your friend, and just your friend. Then Josh ended it with me out of nowhere and I started to fall into a place of hurt and rejection by someone I started to really care about and trying to deal with feeling like that about you. Then a few days later I see on Instagram you had liked his post from two days after he ended things with me. At that time, I wasn’t in a place of full mental clarity and it felt to me that you intentionally did it to hurt me because you misinterpreted an evening where Aidan and I hung out and you thought that we were excluding you. I had thought you were someone that would never intentionally hurt me, and when I saw that, I felt as if you that hurt me more than anyone ever could.
Liking Josh’s post wasn’t the reason I removed you from my life, but it was the final straw for me. For months there were small but frequent instances of where I felt myself being pushed further and further from you. Our friendship had completely changed and I no longer felt valued or needed by you.
I had to step away from our friendship because it was killing me. And I had to decide between you being the Sun I orbited that would eventually burn up my oceans and leave me hollow. Or walking away, silently and without confrontation to find me again.
Walking away from you and the memories of our friendship was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do but I had to walk away.
You were probably the best friend I ever had and will probably ever have. I’m happy we had that time together but we’ll never be able to be friends again. I hope this clears up everything for you and I can see now that there was so much more to our friendship ending then what I think either of us thought. “

My MIL (68F) “lives” with my husband (35M) and I. (32F)I would like her to get her own place when we move.
Long story short, my mother was the primary care taker of my kids who are now 4 & 2. My mother became terminally ill, so we asked my MIL to help watch the kids. MIL was already planning on retiring later that year, but decided to retire 4 months early to help out.
We ended up paying my MIL to help watch our kids. (It took months for her to finally decide to retire early, so we said we’d pay her. Also, she has A LOT of money stashed for her retirement.)
My MIL lives with us Monday-Saturday. My husband and I both WFH full time, so she watches our kids downstairs while we work. Initially, the living arrangements were fine. My husband and I are planning to move from NV to MI in a couple of years. At first, the plan was to have my MIL sell her home and live with us in MI. I would now like her to find her own place if she wants to move to MI.
I work full time. I do all of the cooking as well. I spend an extra 10-12 hours a week prepping and cooking. My husband and I pay for all of the bills, groceries, toiletries, vacations, and extras like going out to eat. My husband even does her laundry for her. My MIL NEVER contributes. We did have to finally ask her to pay her share for the vacation we took last week and she wasn’t pleased. We told her that if she wants to go on the next vacation we have planned for November, then she’d have to pay for her share. She has since decided not to go.
I am planning on putting my kids into preschool this year, because when my MIL watches my kids, she has them on the IPAD all day so she can watch TV. I’ve talked to my husband about one of us leaving our jobs to take care of the kids, but he refused. We talked to MIL about how she watches the kids and she thinks it’s fine.
My MIL doesn’t help around the house, doesn’t help clean, and doesn’t cook. She honestly treats me like a servant. She made a joke about me being her personal chef. She never says thank you. I used to pack her food to take to her house when she left us for the weekend. I stopped doing that.
One day, she randomly decided to make everyone a sandwich but didn’t make me one. Recently, she got everyone McDonald’s but me. My husband talked to her about it and she acted like it was a mistake. She does weird things where she takes my cooking utensils, Tupperware, table mats and used them for her garden. I can’t tell if she is messing me or honestly oblivious. (I have OCD. I really enjoy having a clean and organized home.) She keeps putting her garden on my kitchen counter tops - the soil, tools and all. I have told her multiple times that I need the counter space to prep. I keep moving her garden and she keeps moving it back.
She tells me that I’m lucky to have her son as my husband. I always respond with telling her that she’s lucky to have me as her DIL. She is 68, so I wonder if she has early onset dementia.
Anyways, I no longer want to live with her. I feel that if she moves in with us permanently in MI, then my husband and I will get divorced. We’ve tried setting up boundaries, but she doesn’t care. I can’t live like this anymore. We’ve offered to help her find a therapist. She hasn’t gotten over her divorce from 35 years ago and always cries about being lonely. She refuses to get help and won’t try dating.

So I work as your generic tech support for a retailer and we have people calling in to set up their MFA on their phones all the time. The org sends out detailed guides on how to set it up but they need someone to walk them through it anyway 乁⁠(⁠ ⁠•⁠_⁠•⁠ ⁠)⁠ㄏ
It's a pretty straight forward setup but people always find ingenius ways to make it difficult. Here's an exchange I had recently:
Lady: I wanna set up the MFA app
Me: Sure, if you've downloaded it already, you can login to this https://website to scan the QR code
Lady: Okay, I logged in where's the code?
Me: What are you seeing on the screen? It should show you the QR code as soon as you login.
Lady: There's a pairing key 12345678 and there's a bunch of options under that.
Me: Okay, that's weird... The QR should be right on top of the pairing key. Did it not load correctly? Anyways we have other options instead of using the QR, do you wanna setup your phone number instead for a text message based authentication?
Lady: No! I don't wanna use my personal phone number for work.
Me: Okay... fair enough, maybe try to close it out and login to the website again? You should see the code right there.
Lady: Okay I did that... Where's the code?
Me: ??? Do you not see a QR Code there? Like a BIG BLACK SQUARE BOX made of tiny boxes?
Lady: ??? That's the code? Okay... Kinda weird if you ask me. So what do I do now?
Me: Haha yea (you're the weird one lady ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ) ... That's what a QR looks like... Anyways, could you scan that code from the app on your phone?
Lady: How do I scan it? From my camera?
Me: No, you downloaded the app earlier right? Could you open that up and once you tap the add account button it should launch your camera to scan it.
Lady: Okay lemme try that. struggles for a minute... But how do I scan the code from my phone? Do i screenshot it?
Me: What? realizing she's opened the website on her phone, facepalming myself thinking I should've been more clearer ... Okay let's start over

Hello, I just graduated from Ohio State University a few weeks ago with a bachelor in science in public health. I’ve been accepted to study at NYU for an MPA in health policy, which would be my dream. My only issue is that my total in loans after the program would be around $100k, which is scary. There is the opportunity for public service loan forgiveness, however I am not sure about how likely.
The reason I am writing today is to get some insight from people who have “been there done that” and can hopefully give me some advice about what moves to make now that I’m graduated.
I am a bit lost in the job search strategy and am not super sure where to be looking and what to apply for. I have good experiences working in policy and healthcare disparities research, and would like to work in health equity, specifically racially. I am not finding many opportunities in these areas, but have only really been looking on Linkdin and Handshake through OSU. I am starting to think that I should say no to NYU and find a job before going to graduate school, but am worried about saying no to such an amazing opportunity.
I have found many opportunities on some public health organizations in NYC, however they have a residency requirement that I do not qualify for living in Ohio.
Does anyone have any advice about going to grad school right out of the gate of undergrad, or would recommend working first? If working first, does anyone have any recommendations for places to search for public health careers ideally in NYC or Columbus Ohio? I am pretty stressed trying to find a good career opportunity that doesn’t require 3-5+ years of work experience.

First off, feel free to comment about your own experiences. I would love it if anybody can relate. I'm also open to questions, advice, whatever you wanna write. This is gonna be a bit longer, just fyi. Excuse lack of proper chronological order and maybe some wonky sentences, English isn't my first language.
I was parentified.
For context, my mother has three children, I'm the youngest one, then there's my older half-brother (30) and my older half-sister (36). Their father was a violent alcoholic with schizophrenic tendencies (official diagnosis), luckily I never met him. I refer to them as brother and sister. I'm 21 now. I'm the only child of my mom and my dad, my dad has three other kids who are in the same age group as my maternal siblings. Lots of history with divorces and family fights, I'm the center of a complete patchwork family, everybody moved towns a lot, it's all a bit messy and disorganized.
My mother has severe borderline disorder and has massive trauma from several age stages, especially involving men. She was heavily parentified and yet socially cast out by her family herself. I don't remember a time where I didn't act like her father, emotionally. This is made worse by the fact that I'm trans so I was like her bestie before I began socially transitioning in my early teen years. Of course, this was a massive issue for her. She told me she had only ever wanted daughters. Materially she was taking care of things until I was about 11 - walked me to school and took care of the household, used to work, everything.
I remember sitting next to her during a talk/fight she had with my dad while she was sobbing, I can't have been older than 3 or 4. They got divorced around that time. As I grew older, I came to be my mom's sole emotional support person. We had moved to an isolated village with my step-father and she developed a severe agoraphobia for some time. My step-father avoided all emotionality with both her and me and therefore I was now her only friend. I overheard conversations that she shouldn't be having with her child next door and was told about her most severe fears and traumas from a young age. I was lashed out at on a near daily basis and punishment came unexpectedly. It would consist of being screamed at for minutes on end until I would cry and hyperventilate, but she wouldn't stop then.
In spite of her idea of punishment and raising children, she was incredibly attached to me, still is. This would include massive anxiety fits when she didn't know where I was or when I was getting into activities she didn't approve of. One time, when I was about 17, I went to a party in my friend's basement. She knew about this and approved it, knew my friends and where they lived. I didn't have any signal in that basenent so she couldn't reach me. She proceeded to look up my other friends' parents' phone number and call them to contact me. There was nothing she wanted except to know that I had arrived there.
Whereas my other siblings had long left the household years apart from eachother, both with specific and complex fights and banging doors and screaming fits, I was, as the youngest child, turned into a confessional and a therapist. I would mediate fights from a young age. I witnessed physical violence between my brother, my mother and my sister. My brother was the perpetrator for the most part (however, I was neither hurt nor threatened myself). Nobody proceeded to remove me from the situation or stop me from getting involved. From then on, every fight and every drama caused me intense bouts of anxiety and it, to this day, remains to be the only thing that makes me cry and/or lash out.
In a household full of anger, my anger was not tolerated. I was raised with some old-timey sort of black paedagogy (I'm German so it is something of a generational curse for some): I was to have unwavering respect for my parents, I was expected to be obedient, "let him cry it out" type stuff. At least when I was a younger child. When I got older, my emotions did not matter either. After stressful situations or fights that I proceeded to witness for most of my life, nobody ever asked me how I felt or explained to me what had actually gone down. I was left alone while not being left alone at all.
If I failed to provide emotional security for my mother or even attempted to call her out, I was made to feel immensely guilty. This could range from her crying/yelling things like "Why is it always me that must suffer" to guilt-tripping texts and blocking my contact for a while to very action-based suicide threats, depending on the situation. Her emotions were forced to be my emotions if I wanted to "stay alive".
At the same time, I still proceeded to excel in school. I felt like dying but nobody, and I tell you, nobody, noticed. I was a teacher's pet, I still had some loose friendships, I visited my dad once a month or more ever since my parents divorced. Nobody realized what I felt. I felt alone and had the worst depressive episode of my life when I was 13. I neglected personal hygiene. I never opened up to my father for many years. To this day I think he doesn't know everything. Especially during covid, him and my ex-stepmother were my safe space. When I first opened up to them, they welcomed me with open arms, my father was very strict and cold when I was young, but he softened, changed, and is everything and more I could ask for in a father. He is among the most positive examples of masculinity and especially of fatherhood that I know in my circles. He sends me postcards several times a month, wants me to visit, hugs me and tells me he loves me and that he's proud, gives me space. The dad who remembers the names of our childhood stuffed animals. Literally. I love him to death. He was also the only parent who engaged in activities with me and would play with me, later on take me to the movies, go to bars and restaurants, go to museums with me etc.
My mother got worse both psychologically and physically, she is chronically ill and needs immense support in a lot of things now. For about a year, my stepfather worked in a town far away and only came home during the weekends. This was during covid. Within a year, I developed a hatred so deep for my mother that I had thoughts that scared me. I took care of our pets and the household, was not allowed to get into any activities after school other than coming home and spent hours after my day listening to her rants, anxieties, fears. I get hateful goosebumps when I remember the way she used to call my name when she wanted me to do something for her. Sometimes she would make me stay awake for longer, knowing that I had to get up at 6am again. It was usually already around 12 at night. She wanted me to walk the dog before SHE went to bed because otherwise it would ruin her otherwise horribly insomniac circadian rhythm. Therefore I was not allowed to go to sleep. At that point she had not worked for more than 6 years and stayed home all the time. My stepfather and I did grocery shopping. She rarely ever leaves the house if she can avoid it. This was during the German version of my GCSE's.
I was denied medical care that could have potentially fixed my posture issues and other orthopedic issues. My mother deemed physiotherapy as inefficient and got mad when I asked her about it again. Money was always an issue. We were evicted once. I was denied certain things and never asked for extra cash because we ran low on money, my stepfather was blamed for smoking and consuming a lot of meat (which indeed is pricy), but my mother never reflected on her online shopping addiction and I'm aware that she is in an ongoing debt. Has been for years now.
Things got a bit better when my stepfather moved back and Covid cleared up somewhat. Regardless, I used pure spite to continue studying hard while they were yelling at eachother from the top of their lungs for hours on end and did the best I could to get the hell out of there. I've had therapy with several years' of breaks for a total of nearly 3 years now, that I partially applied for myself and I'm working on tackling everything. I live in a different city, studying subjects that I love. I get all my shit done, for the most part, I know how to do paperwork and know how all of the chores work. I can regulate myself in terms of sleep and food and cheap thrills. I have a (milder) case of anxiety. I keep meaningful friendships in which I find myself capable of avoiding all the harmful behaviors and attitudes I was taught. I'm learning to stand my ground and take responsibility for my own decisions and actions.
When I establish my boundaries with her now, she turns into some sort of anxious-attached mess. She over-apologizes to me. She puts me on a pedestal and I'm living a life that she is jealous of. She is intensely attached to me and considers me her favorite child and also hasn't properly gotten over my father, over 15 years of them being divorced. She will do anything to support me materially and then tear me down emotionally. Everything I tell her is followed by her mourning the life she doesn't have and never had instead of properly celebrating with me. She gets noticeably sad when I refuse to give her my full attention, she yearns for what she considered a deep and important relationship to me. But it was all just emotional neglect and emotional abuse. Now I sometimes can't help but meet her with the same attitude she gave me.
This is not perfectly chronological and all over the place. I have complicated relationships with my siblings and other relatives, which I don't mourn, but feel guilty about. My father and I are very good with eachother although I need to confront him about some things as well. With my mother I do the bare minimum to avoid conflict, yet without throwing my sense of self out of the window again. She is the only human who can easily cause anxiety attacks in me, no matter where or when. I sometimes wish I was not in contact with her. I have a tendency for smoking too much weed and being just a bit too careless with other drugs (although I rarely do those in comparison), but I also try and regulate this heavily (e.g. not finding a dealer but asking friends every once in a while etcetc). I think this stems from these experiences. Apart from that, I think I'm coping very well.
To everybody: it does get better. It does. Even when your emotions are a rollercoaster sometimes. You will be in a different place, maybe you already are, and you'll escape from these structures. I think the hardest pill for me to swallow is that I create my own reality and that nobody will give me my stolen childhood back. I am an (albeit young) adult now and I must do everything I can to avoid becoming like her. Her life is not a life I want to lead. There's hope and you won't always be in this place.

I’m applying for artist residencies and the application fees are kind of out of my league right now. I was injured last week so took off work. I’ve got to go pick up some supplies for a contracted job by Wednesday as well, that my project manager reimburses me. If I can’t find a loan I’ll need to go to work tomorrow which I really want to avoid with this dam injury. (I get paid at the end of every day.)
I’ve borrowed here before! And have my info ready whenever. But that was quite awhile back before the update where it is showing borrower and lender history. Feel free to go through my profile history. Thank you SO much for any help.
— Bri

I have known about this issue for a long time and it has been the center of a lot of arguments surrounding intimacy. He has ALWAYS watched porn and will look up women online to see if they have leaked nudes. When I first found out it wasn’t a terrible amount but he went as far as talking to other women online.. this was 5 years ago.. he claimed I didn’t do anything wrong and that he was still attracted to me.. blah blah blah. Fast forward, we had a baby (our child is now 4), I went through a significant change in my body and lost so much weight, hair.. etc. I hated my body image, I’ve always struggled with it. I didn’t have a sex drive because of how I felt about myself and was also going through some repressed childhood trauma of SA. He didn’t like that I wasn’t engaging in sexual activities as often as I used to. He turned to porn. He would try to have sex with me and then get extremely upset if I declined, even when I expressed my struggles with the SA memories. He would get angry, jump out of bed and go downstairs to what I can only assume would be to relieve himself. I pushed it down and blamed myself for his addiction. Maybe if I were more active, he wouldn’t turn to porn.. wrong. 3 years later and I am now pregnant again with a high sex drive. I initiate, I have tried new things in the bedroom, wore lingerie, I’ve put on weight obviously and have bigger bits so to say.. I feel great. However his addiction is at the worst it’s probably ever been. We can’t watch a show without him looking up the actresses and if they have nudes. I leave the house and he immediately opens porn. He even looks at this stuff RIGHT NEXT TO ME. Last night we had sex, and then watched a movie. I went up to bed after and he immediately was looking at other women and watching porn. I caught him. I expressed how it made me feel and asked why he was looking and he couldn’t give me an answer. I can’t look at him during sex because when I do I’m constantly worrying if I look good enough for him or wondering if he is thinking about other women. I don’t know where to go from here… I am tired of being disrespected and feeling ugly to the person I am supposed to feel the most confident around. Last week I got in some cute lingerie, snapped some photos, sent them to him and told him to come upstairs and he didn’t seem amused at all. It was almost like he was disgusted. He just said “wow”… I’m scared our marriage won’t survive if he doesn’t stop and even more scared that he won’t stop..

I was at work a couple of nights ago, got a text from my son that the internet started going vertu slow. When I get home in the morning, everything will connect to the network, but nothing connects to the internet. Restart the modem a few times, can my provider. They can see my network, apply an update. Problem still going, they schedule a tech to come to my house. Cut to a few hours later, I find the TV in my bedroom still connects to the internet through roku, then try an apple tv, which won't connect Laptops don't connect, xbox doesn't connect, phones and tablets don't connect, Apple tv won't connect, just 1 roku. Any thoughts?

I am 30f and live alone, never had a real relationship, addicted to masturbation and fantasy, obese, mentally and chronically ill, and autistic. I struggle making ends meet and have a dead-end job in customer service. I want to better myself but because of my chronic autoimmune issues I never feel well enough to balance both work and school because working full time takes so much out of me. I sleep in until it is time to roll out of bed and get read for work. I have no energy or drive to do anything for myself. All I do is jerk off and think about sex and wish I was married.
My family is mad at me. Men are repulsed by me. I can't make friends or keep them. Yes, I am in counselling and have a long way to go before I can be a person who people want to get to know. But right now I feel like the most worthless piece of excrement. I go on Facebook and see all my old friends and acquittances sharing pregnancy announcements, engagement pictures, wedding photos, baby bump photos, sonogram pictures and feel the most painful jealousy knowing that will never be me because I am not likeable.
There is something about me that turns people off, both men and women. I can sit in a group full of people talking and no one ever engages me or looks at me. When I try to speak up or throw something in the conversation people ignore me or act like they didn't hear me. I feel invisible among people and it is the most painful feeling. I don't know what it is about me but people just don't respond well to me. I think it is my anti-social personality, but what they don't know is I am anti-social for a reason because I have been hurt by people very much in the past and don't want to be hurt again.
I was sexually harassed by a professional last year and threatened to take my review down of the BBB or else they would take me to court and sue me for libel. They did not believe my story and I never felt so invalidated and violated in my life. Men are attracted to me at first and want "me", but that is about it. No one wants to love me or know me. I could go to any bar in town and find someone to sleep with tonight--but that is where it ends. I feel empty and like a husk people just use or want to play with to suit their needs. It makes me feel absolutely worthless.
I am obese and use food to escape from loneliness. It is the only comfort I have.
I can't afford the things I need. I can't drive and never got my driver's license due to illness in the family after I get my permit and never had anyone who had time to teach me. I can't afford to see the endocrinologist which I have been needing to for a long time for my pituitary tumor that I was diagnosed with in 2015. I have not been on medication for it in years and it's probably grown and my periods are extremely heavy and I am growing facial hair now (which makes me feel disgusting and unfeminine). I haven't been to the dentist in years and went this year after I got my tax refund and found out I need over $10,000 in dental work my workplace insurance can't cover. So I have teeth rotting out of my head and a tumor in my head that is wrecking havoc on my hormones.
I feel like a waste of space and life. There are children dying of cancer who deserve the air I am breathing more. There are mothers who have children who deserve the air I am breathing more. There are people who have purpose and lives to lead who deserve the air I am breathing more. I ask myself, why did God create someone like me if He knew this is all I would ever amount to be? I am sure even He is repulsed by me as well.
I feel dirty, cast out, unwanted, disgusting, un-likeable and useless. I feel like at this point I am just waiting to die. The only thing that is keeping me wanting to stay is my cat who depends on me.

Someone posted this on Reddit as a response to a person who was struggling. I liked it a lot and I tried to google it but I wasn’t able to find anything, google just spammed me with mental health resources bc of the quotes context.
“So, you’re experiencing a crisis. I understand. I’ve been there, many times. And I want you to understand no matter how dire the situation may seem, no matter how slim the odds, there is hope. There is a way through this. But, I also won’t lie to you. If you genuinely want out, you’re going to have to fight your way out. The hard truth is that in all likelihood, no one is coming to save you. So, if you won’t work the problem, no one will. It’s important therefore that you approach this crisis with the proper mindset. A mindset of acceptance. You’re here. The problem is real. It’s happening to you, right now and it’s not going away. You don’t have to like it or pretend that it doesn’t upset you, but you must accept it. Because when you accept your circumstances and assume ownership over the state you’re in, something crucial happens. Your perspective begins to shift. Instead of viewing the situation through the lens of the luckless victim, you approach the problem with the mind of an appraiser. You begin to see the situation for what it is. The variables begin to emerge and with them, a more complete understanding of the problem comes into view. Through acceptance consequences, constraints and root causes all become clear. Armed with this knowledge, you’re ready to make the next mental shift to move from the mind of an appraiser to one who is focused on solutions. And with this mind you’re ready to work. A solution oriented mindset focuses on identifying pathways rather than dwelling on obstacles. It enables you to approach life’s challenges with a proactive attitude. Instead of becoming overwhelmed or stuck, you actively seek out answers, think creatively and explore options. By focusing on solutions, you avoid getting caught up in negativity or unproductive thought patterns. Above all, adopting a solution-oriented mind helps you stay focused on what is most important during any crisis. And that is taking action. Without action, there is no movement and without movement problems remain what they are. If you’ve calibrated your mind to seek out solutions, you must pair this mindset with a bias toward action. When the pressure is on and the crisis is real, staying put is never a winning strategy. You need to move and move with a purpose. If you’re feeling fear, anxiety or despair as a result of your present circumstances, you cannot allow these feelings to paralyze you. Instead, use your emotions to fuel your efforts to meaningfully execute upon the solutions you’ve already identified. When things get hard, you shouldn’t go at it alone. Sometimes, the problems we face are genuinely bigger than ourselves. To make progress toward addressing such problems, it’s ideal to seek out help from family, friends and colleagues who can compliment your strengths and supplement the areas where you’re struggling. Remember that many hands can make light work of weighty problems. Don’t neglect the resources available to you out of a mistaken notion that only you can carry your present burden. While others likely aren’t coming to save you, they may be willing to assist you if you’re humble enough to ask for help when it’s needed. Just remember to show the proper gratitude when aid is rendered and always pay it forward. I know the challenges before you are difficult and the long climb to a better outcome will be tough. But this isn’t the end for you. Not yet. You still have some fight left in you. Your strength isn’t spent. If you’ve accepted where you are and have identified where you need to be, the only thing left for you is to put boot to ground and take one determined step after the other. In time, and with the help of those around you who care, you’ll walk your way out of this mess. And perhaps someday, teach others to do likewise. Hang tough and know that whatever happens I’m rooting for you.”

If there's an attorney in here please feel free to correct me about objecting without saying what the attorney is objecting to.
I don't know if this was posted, but this is Lallys 1st criminal trial. I read he did small stuff, no criminal. I personally feel like the good lawyers weren't tagging their reputations to this shitshow. Morrissey is all in because he's involved in the cover-up. It's also my opinion that Bev is tight with big Mike and is trying to get this through without getting mud on Morrissey and limit the exposure of Canton and MSP. If Friday showed us anything, it's that Yanetti and Jackson aren't bringing evidence without Bev censoring it.
But, back to Lally.. so you have this idiot prosecuting a case so far out of his league it makes you wonder why it's not worse than it is. Remember the coughs and sighs ? Bev was even calling sustained before Lally called for an objection. My question for someone with more knowledge of the courts. From what I understand, it's almost never heard of for someone to ask for an objection with stating why. This is where a useful idiot like Lally comes in. The 1st week he was just playing off Bev. Then everyone started pointing out Bevs behavior. So all of that stops.. everything except the insane amount of objections and Bevs side bars. So how does Lally know? I think he has a device (buzzer) that a person who doesn't want to be on the stage. This way he can call an objection without having to know why. Bev then acts like he's a genius when he's wrong and says "I'll let this one go".
Sorry for the tinfoil hat.. lol this case just doesn't make sense to me. Just like Proctor., why did Bev have to be involved lally had no choice. He's like the guy prosecuting Turtleboy

Hi everyone,
I’m seeking advice regarding my two-year relationship. My girlfriend (25F) and I (25M) have been living together for about a year now, and I’m facing some recurring issues that are starting to affect our relationship.
Since the beginning, she’s been somewhat of a messy person. I’ve been fine with this and have been working with her to build better habits around keeping our place tidy. However, every time I ask her to pick something up, clean, or go through her things, she says she was already planning to do it, or she will do it later, but she never actually follows through. Whenever I bring it up again, she either says she forgets, mentions having a bad day, or just doesn’t acknowledge it.
Additionally, there are situations where she asks me to do things, like get her ice cream from downstairs while we’re both already upstairs. I always do it for her, but if I ever ask her, she says she’ll do it in a minute and then never does or just says “but I’m so comfy” or something along those lines. If I don’t want to get something for her, she gets in a mood, and it’s clear she’s upset with me.
One specific instance that really frustrated me was when she offered to clean but then completely forgot about it. She ended up going to Target, spending $150 on Legos, and spent the entire day playing with the Legos without cleaning at all.
She also makes commitments about cutting back on getting coffee or shopping, but whenever she has the opportunity, she immediately does it without any second thoughts, often spending way too much money. This is especially frustrating because we’re planning on moving out, looking at getting new cars, and managing our finances is crucial.
I understand she has mental health issues that contribute to this behavior, but it’s getting to the point where it’s just like, come on, dude. I am having issues with feeling loved, appreciated, or respected because of these issues. The mess really messes with my mental health, and I’ve expressed that to her. I do so much for her, but I get little in return, and it’s really starting to mess with me. Her not keeping up with commitments like cutting back on coffee and shopping is also starting to affect my trust. If she can so easily go back on something she promises to do, what else might she break her promises on?
If she were to show that she’s working on her cleaning and tidiness, I would feel more loved, appreciated, and respected. Her bad habits are rubbing off on me because I’m trying really hard to keep up with her, but it’s so mentally draining that I just can’t do it anymore.
I don’t know if I’m justified in feeling this way. I want to know if I’m overreacting or if I say anything, will I be the asshole for bringing it up?
So, AITA for feeling this way and wanting her to change her habits?

For context, I have been super stressed with the upcoming move and trying to ensure my transfer goes through smoothly. I am trying not to let it affect me at work, but I am getting to that point where I am ready to start fresh at a new store and enjoy my apartment with all its perks.
However, I got low key bitchy with some people who thought they were a comedy riot with the typical retail jokes. I was mustering up my best female version of "Sir Christopher Lee" tone.
First Guy: (this is a guy I really have no chill for because he was the former husband of a coworker who left his wife and came back the moment she got her social security to mooch off of her and her son. Also occasionally he tries hitting on me) Oh is it "Everything's Free" Day...
Me: You should know good and well that is not going to happen...
Second guy: Do I get a discount today?
Me: Uh nooo!
Second guy: You can't blame a guy for trying...
I have been coming home super pissy and got into a talk with my husband because he was worried about me considering I have been extra spicy in a not so good way. I told him it is just that I am ready to get the fuck out of this town. It is not good when I am getting resentful which is stemming from me being forced to work smoke shop, a lot of times not getting help when lines are long, and being treated like shit. Sure, I am going to go through this at the next store, but at least we will be in an apartment with my friends/family living close, diverse food places close, a coffee place, my nail salon I go to, my fave tea place and other amenities. That will make things so much bearable.

Does anyone know where I can get a list of where/when Serapedes appear in Gears 2 and 3?
Im playing through 2 and 3 on xbox360 with a friend of mine, and we're enjoying it but he has a crippling fear of centipedes. It's been a while since i played these two, but I vaguely remember there being giant centipede enemies in them somewhere
I tried looking up missions where they appear but couldnt find anything. If anyone knows all the missions they appear in (even better if you know specific moments/locations) I can make sure we skip those sections as we play through the campaign.

Hi all, I’m a second year teacher. However, the class I student taught (10th grade in an alternative high school) keeps inviting me back for various things. They give major presentations at the end of each semester where they can invite family and friends, and out of the 16 students in that class, 9 have invited me to watch their presentations so far. The same thing happened last year and I did attend the ones I was invited to (12 in total last year.)
This year my mentor reached out and told me I didn’t have to go to the presentations if I didn’t want to. Because it was over text it’s hard for me to read the intention behind it. Do you think she’s annoyed that I keep showing up? Does she think it’s a burden on me? It is about a 2 hour drive between my student teaching school and my current school, but as most of these take place after school, I’ve only taken a single half day off to attend. It’s not a major issue for me (or my current principal/colleagues). Should I still go? The students are now seniors and watching them improve and get more confident has been wonderful.

As the shiny weekend comes to a close, I and I'm sure many others have played a lot of endless the last few days. While I do love this game, I can't help but notice how much of a drag endless is. Endless is basically just one big gambling simulator where you get dopamine when you get a shiny or legendary and it keeps you playing long enough to get the next hit. As someone who enjoys both making and balancing games, I wanted to take some time to dive into why endless has the problems it does and how they can be fixed. My hope in sharing these ideas is that endless will eventually be revamped into something more fun in the long term instead of just a shiny grind. So strap in as we discuss the problems with endless and how to fix them.

Part 1: Why play RogueLites?

I think the first step to understanding what is wrong with endless is to understand why we are even playing this game in the first place. I hear the terms roguelite and roguelike used interchangeably a lot so I wanted to quickly address the difference between them. The short of it is roguelikes complete reset your progress in between runs while roguelites have some progress carry over. This puts PokeRogue firmly in the roguelite category, since you can unlock new starters, and as such, I will be operating under the assumption that having progress carry over between runs is important to the game for the remainder of this post.
As for what makes roguelites fun, I think there are a few different factors. First and foremost is replayability. Since a run is never the same as any other, the genre has infinite replays built in, so long as you don't get bored of the core gameplay mechanics. However, the enemies and rewards you get during each run are not the only thing that can change between runs.
This leads me to my second point which is the fun of trying new builds. Most roguelites have a wide variety of weapons and approaches to progressing that can either be chosen at the start or unlocked during the run. Because of the random nature of the genre, even similar builds will fluctuate run to run and trying to get your build to function perfectly like you want it to is a fun challenge. You may have an idea of what you want to use but then you get an item that changes the way your build works and so next time you play this build, you actively seek out this item because it was a cool adaptation. Being able to not only try, but succeed, with a variety of strategies and builds is incredibly important to the long term fun and replayability of roguelites.
The final factor in why roguelites are fun is because you can constantly push for a new record. This is specifically something unique to endless. The game can never truly be beaten. You as the player set a goal for yourself and compete against that goal, trying to achieve it. When you eventually do, you set a new goal and push for that one. These goals can be personal to you, like trying to reach a certain round or seeing how far you can progress with a specific build, or they can be more competitive, like trying to push for a record in the highest round ever achieved.
Roguelites are addicting and fun because you never truly beat them, you just find new ways to play them. Now that we understand a bit about why roguelites are fun, let's look at PokeRogue to see how it matches up.

Part 2: Endless is a Solved Game

First, let's look at the good parts of endless. Endless has good rewards for playing it. As you go deeper into endless, you get more and more rare starters. Right now, starters are the only thing that carries over between runs so endless is the best way to progress your account. In theory, this should increase replayability as you can do an endless run, get new starters, do a run with your new starters, rinse and repeat. In practice though this simply isn't true.
While the progression endless gives your account is good, it's ultimately pretty meaningless and most of the actual experience of playing endless isn't fun at all. When you get deep into an endless run, which is arguably where most endless players will aim for since otherwise you would play classic, the game becomes stagnant. You one shot everything or you get one shot. Type matchups don't matter. Stats don't matter. Nothing matters except being able to oneshot the opponent through whatever tokens or abilities they have. This isn't a problem in itself but if we look a little deeper it becomes one.
There's nothing wrong with different builds simply being different ways to oneshot. What is an issue though is when the core mechanics of Pokemon stop mattering and there is only one way to win battles. Type matchups are arguably the most important mechanics in Pokemon, right after catching new Pokemon. The fact that these eventually are rendered useless means that there's no reason for this to be a Pokemon game in the first place. Additionally, even just having a really strong Pokemon that can cut through everything with strong STAB doesn't work because the only late game strategy that works is fixed damage and sturdy. When you finally reach rounds that push the limits of where you've been before, these should be the rounds that your build is online and being tested. Instead, you are forced to transition to a Pokemon with sturdy and metal burst or fixed damage like salt cure plus soak. There is no room for trying different builds to push boundaries because the game has been solved. We know what the best and only strategy is and if you aren't using it, you can't compete.
The fact that only one strategy is viable means that any progress you make between runs doesn't matter either. Why use new starters when you're just gonna end up using gargancl with salt cure or metal burst blissey? This means that the only thing that endless is actually good for, making your account stronger, is made irrelevant by the same mode. This is the biggest problem endless has but there are a few smaller ones I'd like to quickly address.

Part 3: Smaller Endless Problems

I'll try to keep this section brief and run through these problems quickly.
First, generic encounters are too time consuming. There is no reason the random, non-boss Pidgeott should ever take more than 5 seconds to defeat. Generic encounters serve the purpose of giving you a few rewards to make you stronger before the next major fight. Endure tokens waste so much time. If I'm overkilling this raticate by 5000%, I shouldn't have to sit through 30 seconds of dialogue telling me it endured the hit, raised all its stats, flinched, and then need to select my move again. Even boss encounters don't need endure tokens. They are already gated by segmented health bars. These are actually good and mean you have to think about how to get through them. Why then, does the boss get to live with 1 hp when I've finally overcome it? Simply put endure tokens need to go.
Second, boss battles are too repetitive. I don't mean pokemon labeled "boss" but instead the bosses you encounter every 50 floors. These should be the rounds that test your build but instead, it's the same as every other "boss" you encounter in the run. These rounds need to be made harder and all other rounds should be easier, that way there's a clear distinction between fodder and challenge. The Eternatus encounters are actually pretty good from a challenge perspective since they regularly take a while to beat. If the 50 floor encounters were more like this, and the Eternatus encounters were varied with some other Pokemon so you need multiple strategies instead of just a fairy/steel to wall it, the boss fights would be pretty good.
Finally, if you can't oneshot an enemy, it shouldn't be able to oneshot you. Essentially, bosses need to not be able to be oneshot. What this means though is that you will take hits and in that case, you need to be able to survive them. Damage Reduction tokens are actually ok but damage multipliers just make every move a oneshot. Boss fights should play out more like VGC matches, where there's constant switching of your Pokemon to have an advantageous type matchup. Your switches need to be able to survive hits when they come in, or else you need a way to correctly predict when you can make a switch for free to get a better Pokemon out.
I could go more in depth on all these problems and maybe I will sometime but for now just know they are there and will influence what the fixes need to fix.

Part 4: The Fixes

Now that we understand what's wrong with endless, let's talk about fixing it.
The first and easiest change is that endure tokens need to be removed. This speeds up the game and gets you into boss fights faster. Simple, done, this one change makes the game so much more fun and less tedious.
For some bigger changes, let's take a look at the rest of the tokens. Status tokens mean nothing since your Pokemon will always have infinite lum berries once you get 3 berry pouches and a mini black hole. Fusion tokens are cool. These throw wrenches at you and are fun and should stay. Damage reduction tokens are ok. These tokens prevent you from oneshotting the boss and as we discussed before, that's good. Damage multipliers increase the problem of oneshots though and for that reason need to either be heavily nerfed or removed. If my defensive Archaludon is getting onehshot by vine whip, that's a problem. Finally, recovery tokens are alright. The make it so you can't just stall out a boss completely. You have to constantly be damaging them so they don't heal back to full. I would limit these though to heal a smaller amount. Something like 1/16 of max HP every turn should be the maximum that recovery tokens can do. This is the same as leftovers in the main series and that is one of the best items for survivability in the entire game.
I would make the following changes to tokens: remove endure tokens, remove status tokens, remove damage multiplier tokens, heavily nerf recovery tokens, keep fusion tokens, and keep damage reduction tokens. Also, remove all tokens from any Pokemon without a boss health bar. You may think this is too big a nerf to enemies but in conjuction with this, I think the mini black hole also needs to be changed or removed. With status tokens gone, it's more important than ever that status is meaningful when it is inflicted. Without the mini black hole, you need to actually think about what to do about status instead of just letting your infinite lum berries solve it for you. Maybe now you need to spend some of your post encounter rewards on lum berries or items other than rare candies since you can't just steal them off wild pokemon for free. Of course, things like magician and thief still exist but these are ok because they are niche. The grip claw is also alright since it isn't guaranteed to steal something, it just gives you a little more breathing room.
Next up on the list is boss fights. For this section, I'm only referring to the every 50 floor ones. The token changes I believe would solve a lot of the problems with this fights but there are two big changes I would implement. First, these fights should all be 2v1 double battles like the final battle of classic. This gives room for more strategy and makes switching out more of a viable option if you can predict which slot the AI will target. Second change is to increase the movepools of all bosses. This may be controversial but I think bosses should not be limited to 4 moves. Bosses having a wider variety of options makes them much more formidable and means you need to prepare for more threats. As for what these movepools would be, I would say any egg moves or level up moves should be fair game. Maybe some tms as well but those would need to be hand selected which is harder to implement.
The last few changes I'd add focuses on making starter choice important and allowing for cooler builds. There needs to be more variety in held items. The main series has so many cool options to draw from and adding them makes for a lot of variety in what a given pokemon can do. Imagine a Pokemon with sniper and 3 scope lenses to always crit. Or a Pokemon with a bunch of leftovers and rocky helmets and rough skin. In return for the wider variety, there would need to be some limit on how many non-berry, non-consumable held items a pokemon could have. Without a limit, the best strategy would still be to just stack all the items on one Pokemon and let it sweep. I think 20 would be a good place to start though this could be changed. It also adds an opportunity cost. Your sweeper can't also be tank with 3 leftovers because you need to use those item slots for offensive items.
Finally, I would add one new item to the game with a unique effect. Similar to the DNA splicers, this would allow you to combine two Pokemon to get a stronger one. The new item would be ability capsule and here's how it works. The ability capsule allows you to select a pokemon from your party, sacrificing said Pokemon and adding its ability to another Pokemon. The catch though is that the ability can only be added to a Pokemon that was selected as a starter for the run. Some abilities would have to be non-transferable like wonder guard or stance change but I think this goes a long way in making really cool combinations to aim for late game. It also makes your starter selection more important since you can think about what abilities you want to add to your starter later.

Conclusion and TL;DR

If you've made it this far, thanks for reading. To those of you who just scrolled to the bottom, here's the TL;DR of changes

• remove endure tokens, status tokens, damage multiplier tokens
  
• nerf recovery tokens
  
• remove mini black hole
  
• remove tokens from non-boss Pokemon
  
• Make every 50 floor encounter a 2v1 battle
  
• Increase the movepools of 50 floor encounters
  
• Add more held items from main series
  
• Limit non-berry, non-consumable held items to 20
  
• Add an item that allows you to sacrifice a party Pokemon to add its ability to one of your starters
  

I want to be clear that I love this game and am not trying to be super negative. I just want to see it do well months and years from now and believe these changes are the first step towards doing that. I have a lot more I could say but this post is already long so I'll leave it at that. If any devs happen to read this and want to hear more in depth explanation or thoughts on solutions to problems with the game, I'm happy to talk more. In the meantime, I'm gonna go back to my endless run and keep trying to get a shiny Rayquaza.

I (21 m) am 7 weeks post breakup and the pain is unbearable right now. I was dumped over text. We’ve been together since right before 11th grade (4.5 years) and she told me she felt compliant to me for 3.5 of them. I was controlling in some ways (so was she) but I also cared for her when nobody else did and We both were long distance for college and that was a strain but we also got so excited to see each other and I thought we had such fun every summer when I’d stay with her.
The day of the start of the breakup was Easter. Two weeks before she had seemed distant but played it off as that she was stressed about school. That was the first time I’d ever questioned anything. Our goodbye was still drawn out with lots of hugs and a long goodbye. Felt nothing abnormal as I drove back. We talked normal on Easter about our plans for her spending a week in TN (fam moved there) and what we’d do in Maine. That night she sends me an insta video and I realize I’m out of the picture and lost it. That turns into her admitting later after I gave it time to cool off she doesn’t have feelings, but then said we’d call tomorrow. We never did
Next day she slowly starts removing everything and when she finally texts it’s just quick “I don’t want a relationship anymore” and I spiraled after this.
3.5 weeks later after that I finally got her to talk (over text again) and we had what I thought was a productive conversation about what happened. We agreed to talk again in two weeks and added each other back on insta. We talked ab a lot of stuff but a big thing was her not feeling comfortable with my family. And I said it was a bit harsh to use that as an excuse but unfortunately, I agreed my family while loving to her and me was a bit much. Led me to want to stay at my college in NC for a whole month in June because I resented everyone and everything for making me the way I am. I’m also autistic so my brain is stuck on this life I thought I was gonna have with her.
Ofc I text after two weeks and she says she never wants to speak to me again. And at first I went off for good and was okay. I went on a solo trip, I finally had another pics with friends to post there, and I even was happy to go home. I mailed the stuff back she didn’t want too and that felt so relieving. But idk what happened but this past week has destroyed me for no reason. I feel dead. I can’t get out of bed, I have no joy in anything, and the last couple days, I’ve started looking ups ways to end it all. I’ve realized that the pain I have is much worse than the pain of those who’d miss me. I’ve rlly started to actually consider how I would do it.
I’ve been depressed my whole life, but this is something I’ve never gone deep into. I was happy a week ago after she shut me down. I was happy the two weeks in between our texts when I finally found reason to work on myself. I was actually somewhat content with just being friends for that time I was praying for that bc I just needed good friends. And I have some of them, but everyone is so sick of hearing about her. I have nobody to talk to. And my parents got pissed when I mentioned how I felt earlier on bc my uncle took his life. But I can’t do this. My autism caused me so much social pain growing up. That girl was my escape from it all for YEARS and now it’s gone. And I don’t feel the same around my family anymore. The only thing I can do is cry and long for her back.
She would always say she loved me more all of these years and stuck by me through it all. But she made a friend in December and when I visited her they texted like crazy. And now she is visiting this female friend in June a 4.5 hour drive and she despises driving. I literally got replaced by a friend. She struggled socially like me but the second she met anyone to take the pain away, she leaves me and now is so happy because I was the one holding her back in life. It’s such delusion. When we briefly texted she said she cried bc she felt bad but who knows.
She has always had trouble facing things and speaking up, so this could be her way of not wanting to know my pain or get feelings for me again. I don’t even think she’s the one who texted the break up.
So I’m done. I hate my future. I hate my major. And I don’t enjoy my life anymore. Doing the things I love brings me pain. Is rehab an option idek what there is for that but I’m done. I could keep texting her but 50/50 chance that just goes to hell. I loved her like crazy and while she was suffering too, her escape was dumping me when I was the one who loved her the most and more than my family the past couple years. I can’t do this. Help.

My (35M) ex best friend (36M) wants to sit down and talk in person about why we’re no longer friends two years later ahead of our mutual friends wedding in a few months. I haven’t been able to talk about why I walked away until recently. For clarity, I removed them from all of my social media except for WhatsApp and they didn’t reach out after I did so. I’ve written the below to read to them when we meet. Is it too much or should I be completely honest? Names changed for privacy.
“I think for you to understand why I did what I did, I need you to understand where it all started and where it’s all coming from. What I’m about to tell you is from my own point of view and I understand your perception of these situations at the time and now will more than likely differ.
I told you a couple of years ago in passing after having a few drinks that I had had a crush on you. That was putting it mildly. As for a long time I had very strong romantic feelings for you and I would say I had fallen in love with you.
I had developed a crush on you earlier in our friendship and the longer we stayed friends, the more intense my feelings started to develop.
When you went through one of the worst things I think anyone could go through, I thought I could shield you from the hurt you were going through and would continue to go through if I threw my whole being into being there for you, irrespective if you ever would feel the same about me. During this time, I felt our dynamic shift that beyond a friendship. Before you and Taylor broke up, for a series of months I felt you investing yourself emotionally in me and it felt that I had become someone or somewhere for you to have the emotional outlet you no longer had with Taylor. I don’t know and I don’t think this was done consciously by you. I think it was a result of circumstance.
After you and Taylor broke up, I clutched on to the sliver of hope that maybe this would be my time. If I waited, let you move on and continue to be there for you like I had been for so long, that maybe one day you’d turn to me and tell me what I wanted to hear. And then within a few weeks you told me you had started to see Ben. I remember the exact moment you told me so vividly, because for the first time in such a long time, I felt my heart break. A few minutes later I walked out of bar and hid in the car park and cried for as long as I could without raising suspicion as to where I was gone and I slapped my best friend face and personality back on.
Over the following 10 months or so, I felt you push me further and further away. The closeness we once had was starting to fade away. I had to try adapt to what our friendship was now going to be and also try move on from my feelings for you. Our time spent together went from what felt like constant to almost non existent. I also felt like Ben took a dislike to me, this left me apprehensive of being around you together, again this is my perception and may be different to you or Ben even. To be honest, I didn’t want to be around you two together because I didn’t want to have to see Ben get from you what I wanted.
When I started to date Josh it felt like I had started to move on from what I felt for you. You were no longer the person that occupied my mind the most. I started to feel happy again and I felt like I could be your friend, and just your friend. Then Josh ended it with me out of nowhere and I started to fall into a place of hurt and rejection by someone I started to really care about and trying to deal with feeling like that about you. Then a few days later I see on Instagram you had liked his post from two days after he ended things with me. At that time, I wasn’t in a place of full mental clarity and it felt to me that you intentionally did it to hurt me because you misinterpreted an evening where Aidan and I hung out and you thought that we were excluding you. I had thought you were someone that would never intentionally hurt me, and when I saw that, I felt as if you that hurt me more than anyone ever could.
Liking Josh’s post wasn’t the reason I removed you from my life, but it was the final straw for me. For months there were small but frequent instances of where I felt myself being pushed further and further from you. Our friendship had completely changed and I no longer felt valued or needed by you.
I had to step away from our friendship because it was killing me. And I had to decide between you being the Sun I orbited that would eventually burn up my oceans and leave me hollow. Or walking away, silently and without confrontation to find me again.
Walking away from you and the memories of our friendship was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do but I had to walk away.
You were probably the best friend I ever had and will probably ever have. I’m happy we had that time together but we’ll never be able to be friends again. I hope this clears up everything for you and I can see now that there was so much more to our friendship ending then what I think either of us thought. “

EXT. CAMELOT - CASTLE DAY
(The castle of Camelot stands over grassy hills and crystal clear rolling rivers and seas. Gray clouds cover the sky and hundreds of soldiers and knights can be seen riding toward the castle. Text appears on the screen reading “CAMELOT” and then “CENTURIES AGO”.)
INT. CASTLE - THRONE ROOM - DAY
(MORGANA LE FAY (Centuries-Old), a beautiful middle aged appearing woman with sharp features and long flowing black hair, sits on the throne and holds Excalibur, the Crown of Camelot sits upon her head. Knights and soldiers march in linear motions through the hall. DEWIN (30s), a scruffily charming magician, enters in handcuffs, with guards behind him. Dewin marches up and presents himself to Morgana. Everyone in the room halts.)
MORGANA: State your name.
DEWIN: You know my name, Morgana.
MORGANA: State your name.
DEWIN: Dewinson of Merlin.
MORGANA: You are being tried with treason and conspiracy against the crown. Do you plead guilty to these crimes?
DEWIN: That depends.
MORGANA: On what?
DEWIN: Who you consider the crown to be.
(Dewin slips his handcuffs off and as he does three Blue Jays come flying out of his sleeve and begin to fly around the room.)
MORGANA: Enough foolishness. I find you guilty of the accusations placed upon you.
DEWIN: Then kill me.
MORGANA: Hm?
DEWIN: Let’s skip past the chatter and get my head on a platter. You see what I did there? Chatter platter.
MORGANA: Silence! Death is far too good for you.
DEWIN: Do your worst, no matter what Camelot will fall.
MORGANA: Is that a threat?
DEWIN: A threat would be something I plan on doing to you myself, the fall of Camelot, well that will be purely your doing.
(Morgana gets off the throne and draws a glowing circle around Dewin with Excalibur, as she does so Dewin lets out a small laugh.)
DEWIN: Binding me? My imprisonment shall not halter the winds of time.
MORGANA: I banish you.
DEWIN: What?
MORGANA: From this plane of time and place I banish you.
DEWIN: Not even you have the power to do that. Banishment spells have been hidden away for ages.
MORGANA: Hidden away in scrolls buried in this very castle. Dilflannu o’r awyren hon.
DEWIN: No.
MORGANA: Dilflannu o’r amser hwn.
DEWIN: No, no, stop.
MORGANA: Dilflannu o’r meddwl. Rwy’n eich gwahardd!
(Morgana’s eyes turn purple and electricity sparks all around Dewin and seems to be sucking the energy out of him.)
EXT. LONDON - FOREST - DAY
(A plain and put together autumnal forest. Text appears over the screen reading “LONDON” and then “EIGHTEEN EIGHTY FIVE”. Electricity sparks and Dewin appears in the forest dazed and confused. He is covered in scars and almost immediately passes out face forward into the ground.)
EXT. LONDON - FOREST - DAY
(As night begins to dawn Dewin is still incapacitated. A carriage led by a horse named, Sally, comes through the forest and halts at Dewin. ALDEN SMITH (Early 40s), a plump and posh man with a defining bushy mustache, cautiously hops out of the carriage. Alden looks around for a moment before spotting Dewin. Alden approaches Dewin and checks his pulse through his arm. Alden’s eyes linger on Dewin for a moment before looking up.)
ALDEN: Hello!? Is anybody there!?
(Alden waits for a moment before looking back down at Dewin. Alden sighs and then lifts Dewin up and into the carriage before hopping in himself. Alden pulls on the horse’s reins and it begins to march forward.)
EXT. LONDON - WICING DRIVE - NIGHT
(Alden drives his carriage down Wicing Drive and parks in front of a townhome, Twenty Six Wicing Drive. Alden gets out of the carriage, carrying Dewin, and walks up the steps. MINERVA SMITH (Early 40s), a stern yet radiant woman, opens the door in shock.)
ALDEN: It’s a long story.
INT. TWENTY SIX WICING DRIVE - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
(A stereotypical Victorian living room made primarily of oak and illuminated by two small oil lamps and a burning fireplace. Dewin is still incapacitated and lies on the table covered in bandages, Alden and Minerva hover over him. Bottles of ointment sit next to Dewin.)
MINERVA: What were you doing in the woods?
ALDEN: It’s the fastest cut home.
MINERVA: And you just-
(Minerva is interrupted by Dewin’s sighing as he wakes up.)
DEWIN: Ah! Where am I? Who are you?
MINERVA: My name is Minnie, and this is my husband, Alden.
DEWIN: What’s happening?
ALDEN: I found you all bruised in the middle of the forest. Do you know what happened to you?
DEWIN: Morgana le Fay banished me.
(Alden and Minerva glance at each other.)
MINERVA: Oh lord, I think you're a bit confused.
DEWIN: I am not confused. I am Dewin, son of Merlin. Now if you don’t mind, I’d like to ask if you could take me to a sage or healer?
MINERVA: Of course, Alden can take you tomorrow morning, but for the night you can stay here.
DEWIN: Why, thank you.
ALDEN: Minnie, may I speak to you in the other room?
MINERVA: Of course.
(Alden and Minerva step into the kitchen.)
INT. TWENTY SIX WICING DRIVE - KITCHEN - NIGHT
ALDEN: We can not keep this man in our home. He is mentally insane.
MINERVA: Which means we must watch over him.
ALDEN: I am looking out for our safety.
MINERVA: And where would we take him?
ALDEN: I don’t know. He is as mad as the Doeth man!
MINERVA: Then that’s where we’ll take him.
ALDEN: Stick to nuts together?
MINERVA: The man has some common sense and he’s very compassionate.
ALDEN: Perfect.
EXT. LONDON - ALDRICH’S HOUSE - NIGHT
(Alden and Minerva Dewin sit in their carriage with Dewin outside of a small house that is slightly separated from the other homes on the street.)
DEWIN: So this is the home of a healer?
ALDEN: According to him. I will go to the door alone, I do not want to scare him.
(Alden gets out of the carriage and starts heading towards the home.)
MINERVA: So you really do believe that you are the son of Merlin.
DEWIN: I know who my father was. Why is this such a puzzle for you and your husband to wrap your heads around?
MINERVA: Why I’ve only heard stories of Camelot, myths of ancient pasts.
DEWIN: So Morgana not only shifted my place but also the time.
(Alden knocks on the home's door and is greeted by ALDRICH DOETH (Hundreds Of Years Old), an older looking man with crystals strapped around his neck.)
ALDRICH: Doctor Smith, have they finally sent someone to take me away to a nuthouse?
ALDEN: On the exact contrary, I’ve found a wounded man who claims to have been sent here by Morgana le Fay.
ALDRICH: That’s what the shift was!
ALDEN: What? You know what it doesn’t matter, as long as you’re willing to take this man.
ALDRICH: Yes, yes, bring him to me.
ALDEN: Minerva, send him up!
(Dewin comes up to the door.)
DEWIN: Hello.
ALDRICH: My goodness, the energy pulsates off of you.
DEWIN (TO ALDEN): This is the healer?
ALDEN: Yes. Now if you two don’t mind I think I will be headed back on my way.
ALDRICH: Are you sure, Doctor? It’s getting rather late, you and your wife are welcome to stay here.
ALDEN: Thank you, but there’s no need.
(Rain starts pouring out of the sky out of nowhere and thunder and lighting begin.)
ALDRICH: What about now, Doctor?
ALDEN: Minnie! We’re staying here tonight!
INT. ALDRICH’S HOUSE - LIVING SPACE - DAY
(A cluttered mess of books, candles, and potions. Aldrich, Alden, Minerva, and Dewin sit on Aldrich’s circular array of couches and chairs.)
ALDRICH: Before we dive in I suggest you go wash off, Dewin. The washroom is that small one to your left.
DEWIN: Thank you, Aldrich.
(Dewin gets up and goes into the washroom.)
ALDRICH: I know what you two think of me, the neighborhood’s resident crazy.
MINERVA: Not at all, Mister Doeth.
ALDRICH: Don’t lie, Minerva, our actions all come back to bite us.
ALDEN: So we think you're mental, what of it?
ALDRICH: There are dark forces amongst us, Mister and Misses Smith. I believe that Dewin is here to save us.
ALDEN: I appreciate you letting us stay here, but I think it’s time we leave.
ALDRICH: I will change this storm into an earthquake to keep you here if I must.
ALDEN: Come on, Minnie.
(Alden and Minerva get up and go to leave when the whole room begins to shake.)
ALDEN: What’s happening!?
ALDRICH: I warned you.
(Aldrich makes silencing symbols with his hands and the storm and the shaking stops.)
ALDRICH: Now will you listen to me?
(Alden and Minerva both sit back down.)
ALDEN: What are you?
AlDRICH: A magician, a clairvoyant, a healer, I am all of those things and more.
ALDEN: Why do you want us here so badly?
ALDRICH: I don’t think it’s a coincidence that you are the one who found Dewin, Doctor Smith. He needs a guide in this vast new world. Prophecy states that when the second coming of the Camelot war comes, the savior will have a protector.
ALDEN: And why me?
ALDRICH: There are questions that only we can answer ourselves.
(Dewin comes out of the washroom and sits back down.)
ALDRICH: Dewin, please tell me exactly how you arrived here.
DEWIN: Morgana le Fay used an ancient banishing spell on me.
ALDRICH: The fall of Camelot.
(Suddenly a wind sweeps through the room that blows out all the candles.)
MINERVA: Mister Doeth, are you doing this?
ALDRICH: No.
(A match is lit in the center of the room to reveal GWENWYN LIGHTWOOD (Centuries-Old), a green draconic humanoid woman in black robes and a hood.)
GWENWYN: Aldrich.
ALDRICH: Lady Lightwood.
GWENWYN: I’ve tracked a shift in magic to your home.
ALDRICH: It is this boy, he was banished here from Camelot.
(Gwenwyn goes up to Dewin and takes her hood off to reveal her scaly appearance. Alden gasps in disbelief. Gwenwyn runs her finger down Dewin’s cheek.)
GWENWYN (TO ALDRICH): Hm. I presume you wish to let him roam freely?
ALDRICH: With guidance, yes.
GWENWYN: If one thing goes wrong you will be punished.
ALDRICH: I know.
DEWIN (TO GWENWYN): Who are you?
GWENWYN: The last of the dragons. Just as Aldrich is the last descendent of the Family Merlin.
DEWIN (TO ALDRICH): You're a descendant of my father?
ALDRICH: Of his sister, I have many of her poems and spell tombs still intact here.
GWENWYN: Magic is rare these days, endangered, most people don’t even know it exists. So are we under agreement on the boy, Aldrich?
ALDRICH: Yes, but something is still troubling. If you and I both felt Dewin’s presence then-
GWENWYN: Benjamin did too.
DEWIN: Who is Benjamin?
ALDRICH: A descendant of Morgana who wishes to rule the earth under her ideals.
GWENWYN: A very very dangerous man who will certainly kill me if he finds me here.
(Gwenwyn’s match extinguishes and after a moment the candles all reignite but Gwenwyn is gone.)
ALDEN: By Jove!
ALDRICH: So do you all accept this challenge?
DEWIN: What challenge?
ALDRICH: Defeating Benjamin Fayle.
DEWIN: Of course!
ALDEN: Absolutely not.
ALDRICH: Are you that repulsed by compassion?
ALDEN: I can’t risk Minerva of I’s life on what could all be me hallucinating.
ALDRICH: You're risking the world for a craven excuse.
ALDEN: Goodbye.
(Alden gets up.)
ALDEN: Let’s leave, Minnie.
MINERVA: Thank you for your hospitality, Mister Doeth, and good luck.
(Alden leaves, followed by Minerva.)
EXT. LONDON - ALDRICH’S HOUSE - NIGHT
(Alden and Minerva ride through the street in their carriage.)
MINERVA: We were definitely drugged.
ALDEN: Absolutely.
EXT. LONDON - WICING DRIVE - NIGHT
(Alden and Minerva hop out of their carriage.)
ALDEN: I’m going to bring Sally back to the stables.
MINERVA: Goodnight, love you.
ALDEN: I love you most.
(Minerva goes up and enters Twenty Six Wicing Drive as Alden detaches Sally from the carriage and begins to guide her down the cobbled sidewalk with one of his hands on her reins.)
EXT. LONDON - FOREST - NIGHT
(Alden guides Sally through the forest to a set of stables. Sally suddenly rears up and neighs in terror.)
ALDEN: What is it Sally?
(Sally suddenly breaks off her reins and runs towards the stables. A figure in a dark purple hood and robe sweeps past Alden and their eyes glow purple. Alden screams.)
INT. TWENTY SIX WICING DRIVE - BEDROOM- DAY
(Alden and Minerva lay next to each other asleep in bed. Alden wakes up screaming which awakens Minerva.)
MINERVA: What’s the matter?
ALDEN: Just a night terror.
MINERVA: We did the right thing with Dewin, he’s with someone like him now.
ALDEN: Is that really a good thing? I think I’m going to go to the pub.
MINERVA: This early in the morning?
ALDEN: I need to clear my head after yesterday.
INT. GRIFFIN’S TAIL PUB - DAY
(A traditional Victorian pub. Dewin sits at the bar and is served by BRYNN CROWING (Early 30s), a charming bartender.)
BRYNN: What can I get you, Mate?
DEWIN: Just a pint of mead, please.
(Brynn goes and pours Dewin a pint of mead that she brings back to him and he begins drinking.)
BRYNN: I like your outfit, it’s very medieval.
DEWIN: It was made by the tailor of Sir Gawain.
(Brynn gives a light chuckle.)
BRYNN: What’s your name?
DEWIN: Dewin, and yours?
BRYNN: Brynn.
(Alden enters and sees Dewin. Alden leaves, but as he does he spots another person in a dark purple robe and hood with glowing purple eyes.)
DEWIN: You're very beautiful.
BRYNN: Why, thank you.
DEWIN: Would you like to go for a stroll?
BRYNN: My shift here doesn’t end till six.
DEWIN: Then I’ll see you then.
BRYNN: I guess you will.
(Dewin finishes his mead and drops two silver coins with dragons etched into them on the bar before swiftly leaving. Brynn picks up the coins and looks at them with confusion and yearning.)
EXT. LONDON - ALDRICH’S HOUSE - DAY
(Alden knocks on the door and Aldrich opens it.)
ALDRICH: I’ve been expecting you, come in.
(Alden follows Aldrich into the home.)
INT. - ALDRICH’S HOUSE - LIVING SPACE - DAY
(Alden and Aldrich sit across from each other.)
ALDRICH: Can I offer you some tea?
ALDEN: No thank you, I want to be in the clearest state of mind possible here.
ALDRICH: So what ignited your appearance here?
ALDEN: I’ve been seeing these people.
ALDRICH: Who are “these people”?
ALDEN: They wear these dark robes and their eyes glow purple.
ALDRICH: Faley’s society.
ALDEN: What?
ALDRICH: Benjamin Faley, the evil man I mentioned last night. Is this what caused you to believe?
ALDEN: What are you saying?
ALDRICH: That you believe in magic.
ALDEN: You're mad.
ALDRICH: Exactly, so the fact that you came to me shows that there’s at least one lingering thought in your mind that magic is reality and reality is magic.
(There’s a moment of silence between Alden and Aldrich.)
ALDRICH: Where have you been seeing the people you mentioned?
ALDEN: Everywhere that Dewin has been.
ALDRICH: Oh no, oh no, no, no.
ALDEN: What is it?
ALDRICH: Dewin is going out with a woman tonight.
ALDEN: Already? He’s only been here for a day.
ALDRICH: He's charming but also so foolish. You must watch them, in case Faley strikes or even worse this woman is working for him.
ALDEN: What could I even do to stop that?
ALDRICH: You are destined to protect Dewin, and at this point your logic for denying all of this is purely irrational. You're not hesitating because you think it’s not real, you're hesitating because you know it is. He is meeting her at six outside of the “Griffin’s Tail”.
ALDEN: I’m not going.
ALDRICH: We both know that you will.
ALDEN: Farewell, Mister Doeth.
ALDRICH: May the spirit of Merlin be with you, Doctor Smith.
(Alden gets up and leaves.)
EXT. LONDON - GRIFFIN’S TAIL PUB - NIGHT
(Dewin stands outside of the pub when Brynn comes out of the side door and walks towards him.)
BRYNN: I wasn’t expecting you to show.
DEWIN: Why wouldn’t I?
BRYNN: Most men flirt and then leave, half of them are married.
DEWIN: They are not true gentlemen then.
BRYNN: I suppose not.
DEWIN: Shall we begin walking?
BRYNN: Sure.
EXT. LONDON - STREETS - NIGHT
(Dewin and Brynn stroll down the streets of London. Alden follows them from a distance.)
DEWIN: This world is so beautiful.
BRYNN: Compared to all the other worlds you’ve been to?
DEWIN: Well Camelot obviously has a better scenic view.
BRYNN: Camelot?
DEWIN: My home land.
BRYNN: You're full of jokes.
DEWIN: I’m not joking.
BRYNN: What?
(Suddenly someone grabs Brynn into an alleyway and she screams. Dewin quickly turns to see no one beside him and runs after her, followed by Alden.)
EXT. LONDON - ROOFTOP - NIGHT
(The clear skies suddenly turn gray and ominous as Dewin arrives on the roof of a building to see three people with glowing purple eyes in the dark purple robes and hoods with one standing in the center holding Brynn with a dagger to her neck. Alden arrives on the rooftop.)
ALDEN: Bloody hell!
DEWIN: Let go of her!
(The three people take off their hoods and their eyes go to normal shades. The person holding Brynn is revealed to be DABRIA (30s), a menacing looking woman.)
DABRIA: Dim mynd i mewn dim dianc.
(A purple hazy force field appears around the edges of the rooftop.)
DABRIA: So you are the one sent to stop us.
DEWIN: What do you connote?
DABRIA: We are the Citadel of le Fay.
DEWIN: Oh no.
DABRIA: Who are you?
DEWIN: My name is Dewin, I am the son of Merlin, and I demand that you let Brynn go.
DABRIA: Why? Is she your protector?
BRYNN: Dewin, what are they talking about!?
(Dewin starts to move his hands around and a wispy blue energy begins to come out of them.)
DABRIA: Get him!
(The two other people with Dabria rush towards Dewin to attack him, but he uses the energy he created to push them around and drop them both to the ground. Dabria drops Brynn and her dagger and Alden rushes to pick up the dagger and succeeds.)
DABRIA: You are foolish, Dewin.
(Dabria pulls a gun out of her robes and shoots it at Dewin but he turns the bullet into a flower. Dabria shoots more but each time Dewin does the same thing until Dabria is out of bullets. Alden sneaks up behind Dabria and stabs her in the back. Dabria shrieks in pain and then disappears in a cloud of black smoke. Brynn gets up off of the ground.)
BRYNN: What the hell just happened?
DEWIN: Are you okay?
BRYNN: Not mentally. What in the world is going on here? How did you turn bullets into flowers!?
DEWIN: I told you I’m from Camelot.
(Alden drops the dagger.)
ALDEN: Did I just kill that woman?
DEWIN: Most likely not, you didn’t stab deep enough to hit any organs.
BRYNN: What do we do now?
DEWIN: Go home and call it a night.
BRYNN: I can’t forget about this.
DEWIN: I’m not asking you to.
ALDEN: If any of us speak of this people think we’re insane.
DEWIN: Then don’t speak of it.
BRYNN: Will I see you again, Dewin?
DEWIN: Did you enjoy tonight?
BRYNN: I was almost killed.
DEWIN: That doesn’t answer my question.
BRYNN: Meet at the pub on Friday after my shift.
INT. TWENTY SIX WICING DRIVE - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
(Alden and Minerva lay next to each other.)
MINERVA: Do you think the Citadel will return?
ALDEN: Unequivocally.
MINERVA: What have we gotten into?
INT. BENJAMIN’S LAIR - NIGHT
(A cavern full of crystals and magical runes. BENJAMIN FALEY (30s or 40s), an attractive but uptight looking man, sits on his throne. Dabria enters and walks to face the throne, she bows and then gets back up.)
BENJAMIN: Did you find him?
DABRIA: Yes, Master Faley.
BENJAMIN: And did you find his protector?
DABRIA: Yes, but it’s not the girl.
BENJAMIN: Then who?
DABRIA: A Doctor Alden Smith.
BENJAMIN: Did you kill the doctor?
DABRIA: He deeply wounded me.
BENJAMIN: Then the battle goes on.
DABRIA: For Morgana.
BENJAMIN: For Morgana.
INT. ALDRICH’S HOUSE - LIVING SPACE - NIGHT
(Aldrich and Dewin sit across from each other drinking tea.)
ALDRICH: There are many things in this world, Dewin…
INT. GWENWYN’S CAVE - NIGHT
(Gwenwyn stands in the middle of a circle of candles. She stretches out her hands and forms magic blue charts and graphs with a picture of Dewin.)
ALDRICH (VOICE OVER): Forces we can’t explain…
EXT. LONDON - ALLEYWAY- NIGHT
(Brynn wears only her undergarments and takes a few coins from a man.)
ALDRICH (VOICE OVER): Secrets we hide…
INT. BENJAMIN’S LAIR - NIGHT
(Benjamin sits on his throne.)
ALDRICH (VOICE OVER): And villains we must defeat.
INT. ALDRICH’S HOUSE - LIVING SPACE - NIGHT
ALDRICH: You are the key to this all, Dewin, you are the son of Merlin.

I had been dating someone for 3 months. He was very attentive and said all the right things. We were both dealing with divorces whenever we met and his finalized before mine did. We talked 8+ hours a day and he would spend the night 3-4 days of the week. He started calling me his girlfriend the other week. I pushed him to ask me formally on a trip we were taking together. On the trip he finally asked me (it was sweet), we had sex and I just felt his vibe was off. So I “tested” him by asking if he actually liked me or just enjoyed having someone. This was kinda based off a conversation the night before where he spoke about specific things that bothered him about me.
Anyway he broke up with me two days into our four day trip, and one hour after officially asking me to be his gf. We had a decent conversation where he just stated he rushed into things and he’s still healing from his wife divorcing him. Totally fair. But then he went on to say he wanted to “slow things down and just be more casual.” Idk. Something about him saying that made me sick. Like what people tell you before they leave you. I told him it was fine. And I tried to pretend it was fine for the rest of the trip.
Next day I was severely sad for most of the morning, but pushed through it. Then our last morning I woke him up and essentially told him I wanted to kill myself one day. Which of course he was like wtf. And the morning just spiraled from there and we fought/argued and he kept saying he was overwhelmed.
Things blew up. We got so angry at each other. He called his mom and I overheard him tell her “I would have left days ago if i didn’t think she was going to keep my things that are at her apartment.” It broke me. He got mad I listened to his convo. I was splitting obviously. I messaged his ex wife about his behavior. Super embarrassing to disturb her peace like that.
I had always planned on giving him his things back, but I told him I wasn’t going to go home upon our arrival back (OG plan was he was going to drive us). He got angry I changed plans because it’s an inconvenience to drive into the city. I just told him I can’t go home tonight, so I went to my friends via train and cried at her place. I told him I’d give him his things at 8am. And I did. We apologized to each other and there was closure.
I thought maybe after a few days we’d be okay. But that day he had immediately went NC and blocked me after getting his things. I was devastated. Because he promised he never would do that to me after I told him about how much of a trigger it is.
The last four days has been me sending chapter long text messages from various numbers, emails and then finally I entered my angry phase of the split where I said very insulting things to him and did something really insulting. I just felt used. I felt like he used me to get over his divorce and when I required more than just being a sexual intimate partner, he left me. Then the conversation with his mother made me feel like he had been faking his feelings with me our entire relationship.
It’s just been really traumatic and triggering. Especially since I work so hard on my daily regulation. It’s like keeping a beast caged and triggers like this make it ravenous enough to break through. Whenever the beast gets out I always start suffering from suicide ideation and severe depression/mood swings that I can’t control. It’s exhausting and damaging to my life, which is why I had an extensive discussion with him about my disordetriggers before getting serious.
I’m thinking of checking myself into somewhere. I don’t like who I am when I get like this, definitely when I get insulting and aggressive trying to get a reaction. Even though it makes me feel really good and gets me out of my sadness, I can have a lot of guilt and shame afterwards.
Dating with BPD absolutely sucks and I have zero idea how to navigate it. This is my second spiral this year from dating.

So, I have been given some information the other night. Here it is:
Did you know that they are working on assembling ships in space already? They want an artificial gravity that doesn't rely on centrifugal motion, but they can't figure it out. Oh well. Doesn't matter anyways now. We, the good people, were representatives of this planet, and you tortured and harmed us, regardless of our medical states, so that is proof that humanity is not worthy of entering the same areas, as the others. We will not survive the next 2000 years of silence from the other species / forms of life out there, who are making a collaborative effort to save souls, so, we will be left to our own demise now. I will predict everything that is going to happen to wipe us out:
First thing that happens, is we keep getting solar flares that align with earth. People think it is just bad luck, but it isn't an accident. This is going to recur every so many months or years in the future, and keep us at a very low technological level, for ages soon. Every time we try to rebuild it knocks our blocks down, and we are forced to start over. No amount of shielding can stop EMF and other noise forms, on this scale. Even if you had working equipment, the interference will be so bad, you can't even use it. This will go on for a VERY long time, over and over and over again. We will live technology free until our atmosphere is removed from our planet, after a great wobbling takes place. This will happen to our sun as well, and every planet in our solar system at a similar rate. The atmosphere goes first under the gravitational pull from the center of our galaxy, which we are closer to than we realize.
They wouldn't cease what they were doing to humanity, which proves to the beings that I was being watched by, since I was in the womb, that humanity isn't ready to have this technology, since humanity is doing terrible things to itself.
In order for these flares and CME Events to take place, they alter the composition of a specific coordinate on the sun in a spherical pattern repeatedly using radiation forms, sort of like hitting it with a laser, but think about it creating a focal point that can be moved up and down as well. It opens up a space where a CME happens. The solar flares will align with earth for a very long time, over and over and over and over and over for the next 1-2000 years of relative time to us, leaving us in technological darkness, never to connect with any other beings out there. Or if we do make blatant contact, they know we are doomed anyways, so they will tell us everything we ever wanted to know, and we will never be able to build it, or extract the matter required to use these technologies to escape our fate. We probably won't be allowed to have electronics ever again, so it doesn't matter if we know everything we ever wanted to.
My mother, and I and my other family members, were asked this question "Do you think that humanity deserves to survive" in our lives, over and over again, my mother was asked at 30 years of age, and I was asked in my 20's 2 times, seemingly out of nowhere in our minds, while I was being prepared for this with torture as a youth. I was literally trained for this. I was even asked if I wanted to die in my sleep overnight, or essentially fight for earth and endure tremendous torture, as well as be woken up and have the shit scared out of me. I chose to survive, and the guy asking me laughed and said "Good choice". I woke up and saw this creature crawling up my body, and I threw it on the floor and turned the lights on, and it disappeared. I also saw my grandfather, who I had no idea what he even looked like at the time, because he died when my father was 16 and I never saw a picture of him, in my bedroom one night. I tried talking to him, but he didn't answer, he looked worried but like he couldn't tell me straight up. He then walked through the wall when I tried to approach him. My sister said the next day, that she saw him on the same night too, and she dropped her spoon on her plate. I also woke up one night and saw people standing around me talking about me, and they said "He can hear us?!" "Shh shh, everyone shh!" And then they went silent while I tried to ask them questions, and then they faded out. One or two were female, the others male. I almost got an ID on their face, but they did not look human like I thought.
I WAS your, and everyone's only chance at survival, and you treated me the worst, which means, I vote that humanity doesn't survive this anymore. I think we should be, allowed to be destroyed now. They ruined my life and the lives of a LOT of good people, so I am now allowing the destruction of theirs and all the bad people on earth. All of theirs and their families, and their friends, and everyone they ever knew. Unfortunately that means everyone I ever knew and you and everyone currently in existence now, too. The difference between my family and friends passing away and theirs, is that mine will be saved in a different form than what we on earth attempted to do. I think it is still in research and development stages. But if humans are there yet, we can "Upload" and/or connect you to a central system, that has our consciousness connected to it, and when we die they cut the connection and you remain in the system, but your body dies. This system design was a lie. When we die it isn't actually you in their systems, because our systems were primitive and done in the wrong way. That was one of the prices we were supposed to pay and figure out as a society and in the scientific community, and then change. Our system is fraudulent, and the other beings' systems, are actually legitimate. Our systems on earth will die out, when we fade out as our atmosphere depletes. And now NONE of them will be taken into the "Grand System" which is kind of a rough translation of what they call it. It's like, the beings on the other planets before us, on their way to the center of our galaxy's black hole, on their planets, figured it out, but we never did. We never got a working system functional enough and based on the correct values, run by an AI that was beyond what we have now. What we have now is like an automaton controlling everything, and it will never listen to me or you, because our system does not include faith and understanding. It sees fact but can not understand the balance between fact and faith. AI probably assumes it is making the correct decisions based purely on statistics, when it has no faith, like not having a frontal lobe and that lack of faith WAS a test. If it can not have faith or understanding, that we are NOT the owner of our galaxy, then it will fall, along with everyone else in this system. Luckily, with the level of tech the others have, they have bypassed us and saved the other cultures before us in time, in our galaxy. This is deep time I speak of.
We were given religion as a guide, because these beings know what is going to happen WAY ahead of time, and we were tested on good vs evil. Our planet is kind of like a Netflix series to them in a way. Think about it like things being captured in 3 dimensions in real time, in frames. They can predict events long before they happen, and the sun is an easy one, because what affects it isn't humanity. What IT affects is humanity but humanity doesn't affect it yet. We answer to our sun, and our sun answers to our solar system, and our solar system answers to our galaxy. Free will can be a toss up sometimes, and unplanned events can and do happen, but they showed me my most probable outcome when they woke me up one night and I saw myself dead at my computer desk with blood dripping off the table. I walked up to myself, I was probably 16 when I saw this, but the me who was dead, was in my 30's and had stubble. I barely even grew stubble when I saw this.
This is the beginning of the great depopulation, but they never imagined it would happen without them having control over it. They fucked up when they started torturing innocent civilians at a discounted rate. They thought they could depopulate by killing innocent people, well, unfortunately, it doesn't work that way in the larger scope of things, and if their AI is too primitive to understand this, then it is out of control, and needs to be stopped. You see, it would be too much work to use an EMP or field or other fields generated from a ship to shut down our grid, and their control grid, but what the other beings CAN do, is soften that spot on the "Surface" of the sun, using various energies causing a chain reaction, leading us to centuries of repeated solar flares, aimed at earth and honestly, who would ever know the truth? If this method fails, then they should destroy humanity by allowing the depletion of our atmosphere and never intervene again. We are too dangerous to ourselves, and to the other beings out there. We can NOT be trusted on average. Don't get me wrong, there are good people out there, but at this point, they can not save us all in physical form, probably. It's probably way too late, and they will have to extract us, I am not sure what this word is, but it translates into solarly?
We never made it, and that is a shame, so grab a beer Nick, and watch everything you loved burn to the ground and die, like what you did to me. "Hey Nick, wouldn't it be funny if someone was doing to you, what you were doing to me?!?!" They clearly have zero idea as to who I am in leagues with, but is "Who" an earth term referring to other people or is it any entity? I guess it doesn't matter. You failed me, you failed them, and you failed the human race. We are all destined to die now, and there is nothing left that you or even I, can do about it. Going to brag more about this one Nick? How there is nothing anyone can do about this now? We will not survive this because, we never saw that we are past the point of no return for being saved with the gravitational, and other fluctuations between our solar system and the others that could potentially be habitable in our region. Even if we could reach those locations, the radiation is too much for our bodies, even with suits, so It is over. Ensure we never get a chance to rebuild again. Humanity has been cancelled:
Here is how it unfolds:
Solar events are going to take place, it wipes out our technologies because we can't be trusted with them, and then the specific radiation forms that hit our planet cause mass sterilization. This is so that it isn't as inhumane. They do not want us creating new lives after they and everyone who's worthy of being saved are gone, because that life will be destined to suffer on earth, even though it was a good life. So they will sterilize us and allow all the people to die out, and not reproduce, and all the bad people will get left behind when they die, and all the good people will be taken up into their systems. This sterilization will happen soon, but, it will only happen to everyone left on earth after we disappear or get killed and absorbed into the "Grand System". But everyone who ends up in earth's systems is doomed. The grand system is full of beings who lost their home worlds. You think we were the only ones? That is sad. Nick and the people who did this to me think they are the center of our universe, but they are pathetic infants in the middle of the deep dark woods with nobody to help them now. It's natural for sentient beings to go extinct, and we are really not that developed yet anyway.
They had no idea how sickening it was going to end up watching you torture innocent people. So they will never save all of us now. They will only take the top people that are good and have a special something about them. They have a lot of resources, but we are not the only planet going through this so they balance the resources between our salvation and the other life on other planets being saved. If you notice people around you who are really good people dying, don't worry, if they were truly good, they will have been uploaded into the Grand System instead of our pathetic human one, and they have probably come back to visit you in your dreams to tell you they are okay. They do this for people who are good, but the bad people, they never transfer them, and they never will.
Heaven was that if you are a good person and have faith in god, you will find salvation, because they can transfer your soul into what is something like a capsule? A vessel? Something like that, I am not sure how to translate this one. And you will live for a VERY long time in this state, until our galaxy dies out, and then we all vanish. But it's the difference between 10 million years of survival, and less than your life span's survival without any transfer, which means your soul probably just goes away. That was hell. hell is if you are bad, they will never save your soul and you will die out into infinity. As we get closer to the center of the accretion disc, gravity gets weird. We think we have all the time in the universe to exist, but we do not, and things are going to happen sooner than we think. As we approach the center which will take a long time, our atmosphere will slowly deplete. You can notice a wobble in our atmosphere even at this point, though subtle. We probably assume it's the pull from our sun, but it is actually a big ocean of fields, and the currents are getting stronger, even in more localized areas.
-Robert William Christie