I had a strange relationship with deconstruction as my dad was trained at a university level to do apologetics. He was an LDS chaplain in the Army, and every night for scripture study, we got discourses on the nuances of our faith and justifications for every question we ever had. I didn’t swear until I was 18 years old, or drink caffinated anything until about that time as well, because it was never a matter of justification. It was what my family, my tribe, my people did, to go to church on Sunday, and to be worthy. I was senior patrol leader and assistant to the bishop if that clarifies who I was. I didn’t have “God will reveal it in due time” parents. I had “Here’s the answer, here’s contemporary discussion about it. Here’s some reading material if you want to learn more” parents, except for they were wicked smart, and had biased conclusions.
I was called to serve in the Mexico City East mission. Shortly before opening my mission call, I broke up with my girlfriend at the time. i left BYU-I and went home to prepare. I received my endowments after lying to my stake president about my worthiness to enter the house of the lord. I came clean, and he threatened to not let me go out for a year because I was unclean. The prick made me talk to a therapist to be cleared for the mission field. The therapist had a brain and let me go out. When I was giving my mission farewell speech, I wrote it to include the teachings of many religions in it. I had drawn inspiration from the 13th article of faith “We believe all things, hope all things-“ and wrote a poem about how Adam and Eve related to the Resurection and Atonement of christ. My dad tells me the stake president was shifting in his seat like he wanted to pull me down from the pulpit. Prick.
The CCM was a pleasure to attend because of my district. The guys in my district there held a secret thanksgiving feast after hours when we were supposed to be in bed with food we had smuggled out of the cafeteria. We had look outs so we wouldn’t be caught by the patrolling teachers. My district was placed under surveillance because of politics against our spanish teacher who we could tell actually cared about us, and we were transferred into a classroom with one sided mirrors, and microphones hanging from the ceiling. An apostle came to speak to the entire CCM, and I thought we would get a chance to meet with him directly, or that he would be even remotely accessible in some way. He was kept away from us, separate and removed even though we had the same mission. I played a lot of volley ball, and got into shape enough that I touched the rim of a basketball hoop for the first time while I was there.
My first companion was a native speaker, and liked to spend the mornings in the cyber (Internet Cafe). He would make sure I was on LDS.org while he looked at softcore porn on instagram. We would spend hours there, and I was disappointed that this was the mission.
We went to a previous investigators house, and while there, we saw preparations for an animal sacrifice. These guys were putting alcohol, cocaine, and blowing smoke onto a white chicken, and placed in into a cardboard box with a bunch of black chickens. They showed us a room full of weapons, with blood and feathers strewn all over the floor. We noped the fuck out, and went home.
I requested an emergency transfer after spending most days in the cyber, watching my companion deface JW’s property, and being an all around dick to me by telling me how to shower and how to sleep.
For his replacement, the person that would help me with his bastion of knowledge, they gave me a white guy who spoke as much Spanish as I did because he was only a transfer further into his mission than me. They made this poor kid senior companion to me before his first transfer was over. Why? Because the kid was a workaholic.
The first thing this elder and I did when we got to our apartment was to pick up and leave to go to the house of a member who had just died. We sang at the wake. I sang in a language I didn’t know, for people I didn’t know, with a companion I didn’t know. We sounded pretty damn good. The elder began setting appointments with the non-believing family members during the service. I just sat and watched the mindless kids chase the family dog.
This elder skipped lunch every day, and made me do the same. We knocked every door in our area twice that transfer. One time, he got very sick, and was delirious out in the sun with me while we were walking. I made us go home for lunch that day, and he made me promise to wake him up after thirty minutes so we could get back to the Lord’s work. Three hours later he woke up, chewed me out for letting him sleep that long, and then begrudgingly thanked me for making him rest.
One time, while walking, this Elder expressed to me that he also had some questions, but he was afraid to share the details because he knew my own testimony was fragile. I pressed him for details of his plight, and he revealed to me the darkest part of church history that he had learned while we were in the CCM, that Joseph Smith had drank alcohol while in Carthage Jail before he died. Thoughts of Fanny Alger, of Mountain Meadows Massacre, and of my own mother’s rather recently implemented looser interpretation of the word of wisdom all flashed through my head. This guy was supposed to be my teacher? All I could do was express how sorry I was for his confusion, and told him to have faith. Heaven knew I couldn’t help him.
One night with this companion, it was storming hard, and the streets were flooded. This guy refused to let us go home. We climbed along fences to avoid getting our already wet shoes soaked, and waded through a foot of water to get to the doors that were slammed in our faces. There was a loose wire on a door bell, and when I rang it, I was shocked by the completed circuit the water made. Rejection after rejection piled up. Finally, my “senior” companion said that this was the last row of houses. On the last house of the last row, there was a family that was all deaf. The father opened the door, and was suprised to see us and didn’t know who we were. I remembered the sign for Jesus from my grandparents who started and ran the ASL endowment ceremony in the Saint George temple. The family was thrilled we knew the sign. When I asked if we could come in, the family politely waved goodbye and closed the door on our faces.
Another time when it rained, something fell into my eye. It was one of those freak nature accidents, and small enough that I couldn’t figure out how to get it out without a mirror. The thing stayed wedged in the corner of my eye for hours before we got home and I could finally get the foreign object out. Looking at it on my finger, I could see it was a small green spider. Days later, still in pain, I pulled what I can only assume was accumulated webbing from the spider that I’d crushed against my eyeball off of my lower eye lid. The pain stopped after that.
I bought a $500 camera. It was stolen within a month.
This Elder and I had the good luck before transfers to baptize two children. They would have been baptized anyways, so I didn’t do any actual converting, but I taught a few lessons, got in the water and did the dunk. Bucket list item, check.
I didn’t have enough time for laundry on P-Day, so I’d wash my outfit and dry in on the radiator through the night. Transfers happen, and my new companion lied to our land lords about the electricity bill, paying it in full but not giving a reason as to why it was so high. I didn’t care anymore, I just needed something clean to wear, but these land lord had treated me and my previous companion well, better than the previous landlord who had stolen our cleaning supplies. I felt these people deserved honesty. My senior companion capitulated eventually, and he and I butted heads regularly after that on the morality of things. I think in hindsight he was a smarter and better man than I was.
The new land lords, the “Lagunez Family”, were wonderful. They included us in their activities, and I felt like I had some people in my corner. When I eventually came home from my mission, a daughter of the family had written me a goodbye letter. She is currently serving a mission. They made some great music, and I have “Infiltradors” on CD, the official name of the band the father of the family was a part of (he was the drummer).
I knew the whole area by heart by that point, so I navigated us to our appointments. Half of the landmarks I watched for to know our location were interesting buildings with unique colors. The other half of my landmarks were dead dogs whose decaying corpses had become second nature to see. I began marking how much time had passed by how deeply a certain dog on a certain dirt path’s chest was caved in.
There was an apartment complex in my area that I had been told not to proselytize in because “It’s dangerous.” Turns out, those people didn’t have any money, so the church didn’t want them. That complex was past the dog and to the east about ten blocks.
My companion and I knocked on a door, and visited a man who was missing his legs. His daughter was there, putting dirty water on the aching wounds. He had a single room for a house, and wheezed when he spoke. He couldn’t afford medication. He still went out and worked all day for his daughter, and gave her whatever money he made, trusting her to keep him alive somehow. The church expected this man to pay tithing. The church expected me to tell this man to pay tithing.
I got the chance to hike up a mountain. At the top, I played chess with a chess set I’d procured from one of the best rapid chess players I’ve ever met. He had been the ward mission leader. He was a good man, a good father, and I wish him the best.
I found another man who was deaf and spoke sign language. I sat with him, and convinced him to come to church all by myself while my companion talked with some tienda tender. I was so excited because this was my own personal project and it was going well. The man came to church, and I sat with him through sacrament meeting. In Sunday school (I can’t believe I did this), I accidentally drooled on the guy. I was just talking so he could read my lips, and I guess I forgot to swallow at some point because a dolup of spit landed on his arm. I apologized profusely, and he played it off, but I never saw that investigator again.
My companion and I knocked a door one day, and a man answered. He wore tattered clothes, and maggots were burrowing into and out of his feet. He muttered something about the stars, missing his wife, and he began to tear up. My eyes stung from the stench. The door closed. Somehow, I knew the man would be dead in a matter of weeks.
I had lost hope that I was doing anything worth while. I looked down on the Doc Martins that had stayed with me five months at this point. I was angry with myself for being so useless in the field, angry with the church for giving me leaders that didn’t listen to my needs or perspective, angry with my mom for drinking while I had to teach people that it was a sin, angry with my dad for giving me the skills and knowledge to justify anything, even pedophilia in the early days of the church, to the point where I could look someone in the eye, and knowing the kind of man Smith was, tell them he was a good man and a true prophet of God. Suddenly a man approached us. He said he recognized us as missionaries, and asked about our message. This never happened. People didn’t just come up to us unless they were crazy or dangerous. But this was a public place, and this guy was genuine. My companion talked to him, and gathered his story, but I was plotting something else. I was done with not caring about these people in a way that mattered. I was tired of walking in another man’s shoes, a man who wasn’t me, who believed different things than me. The chopped leg, the rotting dogs, the infested feet, it all swirled into a single thought in that moment.
What would Jesus do?
I walked over to the man, and in broken Spanish asked him to stand next to me. He did so, and I compared my shoe size to his foot. It was a perfect match. He protested, but I didn’t let him get a word in edge wise. I took off my shoes, put them on his dirty feet, and laced them up nice and tight. Those shoes had cost a ton, and had been meant to last the whole mission. All I had left at this point were my fancy dress shoes that gave my blisters back at the apartment. I didn’t care. I walked home in my socks that day, happy as a lark.
Covid-19 hit a month later. I was one of the few they brought home instead of quarantining. After having served only 6 months. I told God if he wanted me to stay home, he’d have to make them release me.
They released me. I think I was one of maybe a hundred missionaries that were released due to Covid. The church realized their mistake pretty soon after I was released. Once Covid infrastructure began to develop, they didn’t release any more. I guess I didn’t serve a full two years, but I did serve a full mission.
My brother served, and he nearly killed himself due to intense depression brought on by Covid quarantine and poor leadership (I’ve got a few mission president stories, but those are for another time).
I learned lying to someone’s face from my mission, and spent the rest of my time at BYU-I as “nuanced” until the last two years, over which the most epic hoe phase imaginable became my new mission. I spent those years terrified of getting a call from the honor code office.
I’m married now, with my degree irrevocably in my possession. I have friends and loved ones that are in the church and are working on their mission papers. I’m beginning to feel powerless again. I’m seeing the decay again, not on legs, feet, or dogs anymore, but in the souls of the people who the church raises to do their dirty volunteer work. I see them like the animal sacrifices I saw being prepared. I’m not sure what shoes I have left to give to those people that I know are going to be in pain.
My parents are out completely now. It was a long time coming, but they are out and so much happier. I’m working on building a new relationship with my family, one based off of the fact that we won’t be together forever, so we have to make the most of our time together now.
Happy Sunday guys, best of luck to you all. And most importantly, chupa la piña.

Ok so basically my year 9 EOY tests have just finished and I fucked up big time. For biology i got 64% physics 73% and chemistry 48%. I really tried studying the stuff we learnt but a lot of it was stuff we have rarely ever seen.
For my language Spanish it was a multiple choice reading test. This test was very difficult as my fellow peers said but some of the really dumb ones got extremely lucky and got 30 out of 45 and more meanwhile, I got a 16/45.
I am in the middle set for english and i fucked up the poem analysation test and got a 7/15 because I read the question wrong.
The only thing I didnt royally screw up was math were i got 85% and 92% on the two tests.
I have been really de-motivated and I really hope these don't go on my record. Just so you know I started studying the week before these tests.
Is there anything I can do better next time or any study habitats I should learn? And do these tests affect anything about my college application or anything?
Thanks for reading :)

Exploration of an Innovative K-12 School Curriculum and Pedagogical Approaches
Before going over the curriculum we must first discuss how to best teach. All of the following methods outlined below are what would I would suggest be use to teach the students trying to use just one or even just two of these would not be enough and would compromise the students learning and education
Teaching Methods
Project-Based Learning (PBL): In PBL, students work on a project over an extended period, which could be a week or a month, to respond to a complex question, problem, or challenge. The projects are usually multi-disciplinary and require students to apply what they've learned in a practical manner. This allows them to see the immediate applicability of their learning.
Inquiry-Based Learning: This is a form of active learning that starts by posing questions, problems, or scenarios—rather than simply presenting established facts or portraying a smooth path to knowledge. Students are involved in the construction of their learning. They engage with the material, participate in the class, and collaborate with each other.
Gamification: Incorporating elements of game design in education can make learning fun and engaging. This can involve point systems, leaderboards, badges, or other game mechanics.
Experiential Learning: This method involves learning by doing and reflecting on the experience. It can include internships, study abroad programs, field trips, laboratory experiments, or any other hands-on learning experiences.
Flipped Classroom: In a flipped classroom, students review lecture materials at home and do their 'homework' in class, where they can ask for help as they practice new skills and apply new knowledge. This allows teachers to spend class time helping students apply what they've learned and coaching them as they work through challenges.
Cross-Disciplinary Projects: By integrating different disciplines into a single project, you can make the learning experience more holistic and interconnected, much like how the knowledge of different magical disciplines would combine in a fantasy setting.
Competency-Based Learning: In this educational model, students advance upon mastering a skill or a competency. This encourages active utilization of knowledge and immediate feedback, similar to how a magic student might advance only after successfully casting a particular spell.
Now that we have given a basic outline of the teaching styles we can go over the curriculum for K-12 the idea would be to Have an A/B day schedule and some classes would meet less frequently because they don't take much time to cover everything, all of this will be done in order to create well rounded students, people and citizens. They are not only creative in nature, but leaders in their own right as well as capable of doing whatever they desire and succeeding wildly
Core Curriculum Classes:
STEAM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Art, Mathematics): must Ensure these subjects are covered both within the integrated curriculum (like coding in math, cooking in science, history in art, etc.) and as standalone classes to develop depth of knowledge.
Memory Techniques & Knowledge Management Techniques: Using an Integrated code based system with AI tools to help teacher track progress and provide more targeted assistance as well as help students with how to effectively organize and manage knowledge, covering basic note-taking, the PARA/CODE system. Using AI to provide semi interactive sessions that not only explain how memory works but also actively encourage the practice of using the note taking method & memory techniques
Project-Based Learning: Encourage practical application of knowledge through project-based learning. Gamification & Experiential Learning: Use these techniques to make learning more engaging and fun.
Flipped Classroom & Inquiry-Based Learning: Encourage independent learning and critical thinking through these teaching methods.
Elementary School: Coding & Digital Literacy: Introduce basic coding principles using visual coding platforms. Begin teaching about online safety and basic cybersecurity. Financial Literacy: Teach basic concepts like the value of money, saving, and spending. Potential to introduce the use of real currency and creating student based economy Community Service: Arrange class-based community projects and encourage involvement in community service outside of school. Gardening & Cooking: Teach students about plants, nutrition, and basic cooking skills through a school garden. Literacy & Reading: Develop a reading program that exposes students to a variety of genres. Writing can begin with simple sentences. History: Teach history from a holistic and critical perspective, exploring different cultures and perspectives. Basic Medicine & First Aid: Introduce simple health, hygiene, and basic first aid skills. Physical Education: Encourage a love for physical activity through a variety of engaging games. Emotional Regulation & Healthy Relationships with Technology: Incorporate social-emotional learning and healthy technology use. Leadership: Begin fostering leadership qualities through group activities and responsibility sharing. Self-Defense: Introduce basic safety rules and personal boundaries. Spanish: Introduce basic Spanish vocabulary and phrases, along with exposure to the culture of Spanish-speaking countries. Songs, games, and interactive activities can be used to make learning enjoyable.
Middle School: Coding, Digital Literacy & Practical Engineering: Continue coding education and introduce robotics and basic electronics. Financial Literacy: Start teaching about budgeting, banking, and simple concepts of earning. Potential to introduce the use of real currency and creating student based economy Community Service: Encourage students to plan and lead community service projects, either in groups or individually. Gardening & Cooking: Progress in gardening and cooking skills, introducing sustainability issues. Literacy, Reading, & Writing Skills: Increase complexity of reading and writing assignments. History: Provide more in-depth history education using primary sources and interpretations. Basic Medicine & First Aid: Offer a more detailed course on first aid and health. Physical Education: Introduce a range of physical activities, sports, and body awareness topics. Emotional Regulation & Healthy Relationships with Technology: Develop emotional intelligence skills, mindfulness practices, and education about responsible technology use. Leadership: Teach various leadership styles and emphasize group projects requiring delegation and decision-making. Self-Defense: Continue with more practical self-defense techniques. Study of Government: Begin a foundational study of the local and national government. Teach students about the branches of government, their roles, and how laws are made. Spanish: Continue to build on vocabulary and grammar learned in elementary school. Introduce simple written exercises and encourage basic conversation in Spanish.
High School: Coding, Digital Literacy & Practical Engineering: Offer advanced coding and practical engineering classes, including topics like 3D modeling and advanced electronics.Teach more advanced cybersecurity concepts and ethics of digital communication Gardening & Cooking: As elective courses, delve into advanced topics like food science or agricultural technology. Literacy, Reading, & Writing Skills: Offer a variety of literature courses, creative writing classes, and research-based writing. History: Teach history as a dynamic and interpretive subject, encouraging critical thinking. Basic Medicine & First Aid: Include more advanced first aid, mental health awareness, and basic human anatomy and physiology. Physical Education: Offer a range of athletic options, and include education about exercise science and long-term health benefits. Emotional Regulation & Healthy Relationships with Technology: Provide resources for emotional regulation, advanced mindfulness techniques, and in-depth discussions about technology's role in society. Leadership: Delve deeper into conflict resolution, strategic planning, and ethical leadership, often through real-world applications. Financial Literacy: Start teaching about budgeting, banking, and simple concepts of earning. Potential to encourage student to start their own business or get a job and have students buy things from each other Self-Defense/Mixed Martial Arts: For interested students, offer elective classes in mixed martial arts, fostering physical and mental skills. Study of Government: Expand on knowledge from middle school and introduce international government systems. Discuss the concepts of democracy, socialism, and other forms of government. Involve students in mock debates and simulations, like Model United Nations or Mock Parliament. Study of Politics: Begin a course on political science, covering key political ideologies, parties, and political processes. Discuss current events and involve students in debates and discussions to encourage critical thinking. Creating Change: Introduce a course on social activism and creating change. This can involve studying historical movements for change, understanding how to effect change within a legal framework, learning about peaceful protest, and planning and implementing a small-scale change project within the school or community. Spanish: Continue to deepen knowledge of Spanish. Encourage advanced conversation and written exercises. Students could read Spanish literature or news and discuss in class, fostering language skills and cultural understanding.
This kind of curriculum would be nearly the best, being interdisciplinary, hands-on, and centered around the interests and needs of the students. It would aim to not only equip students with the knowledge and skills they need to succeed in the world, but also ignite their passion for learning and encourage them to continue learning throughout their lives.
But before we’re done one last thing must be covered. How to assess a student's growth because science shows that paper tests are not suited for the task. There are many innovative ways to assess student understanding and skills without relying solely on traditional exams. The methods that could be used include Assessment Methods
Portfolios: Students could compile portfolios of their work, which could include code they've written, projects they've completed, or essays they've written. A portfolio allows students to demonstrate their learning process, their progress over time, and their ability to apply what they've learned in different contexts.
Presentations: Students can demonstrate their understanding of a topic by presenting on it. This could involve presenting a project they've completed, explaining a concept to the class, or debating a topic with classmates.
Peer and Self-Assessment: Students can learn a lot from assessing each other's work or their own work. This can help them develop a better understanding of the assessment criteria and improve their ability to critically evaluate work.
Performance Assessment: In subjects like self-defense, physical education, cooking, or gardening, students could be assessed based on their performance. This could involve demonstrating a technique, completing a task, or participating in a game or competition.
Reflective Journals: Students could maintain journals where they reflect on what they've learned, how they've applied it, and what they still want to understand better. This can give teachers insight into a student's thought process and their understanding of the subject.
Project-Based Assessment: Students can be assessed on the projects they complete, whether individually or in groups. This allows students to demonstrate a range of skills, including knowledge of the subject, problem-solving, creativity, and teamwork.
Community Service Assessment: In addition to the other assessments, teachers can assess students' community service involvement, their planning and leadership skills, as well as their reflections on their experiences.
The emphasis of Knowledge Management Techniques and Memory Techniques in core classes as a standalone session every day would ideally give students a break from traditional instruction and allow them to process and manage their learnings. This can be in the form of group discussions, independent reflection time, or guided activities for planning and organizing their work.

Not sure if this will help anyone but I hope it helps atleast one person. these tips are from me, diagnosed with major depressive disorder, the king of demotiviation and procrastination and lack of caring, so u can trust these tips!
1) Drink water and eat - Obviously. But drink atleast 2 cups of water a day (dehydration= headaches= not good for revising and doing exams) and eat some fruits, vegetables, meat etc. ensure you aren't eating cereal all the time for example. Just get a little bit of extra nutrition I don't even care how you do it, when I was younger my parents couldn't afford fruit so I would pick blackberries off bushes and wash and eat them. There's no reason not to eat atleast some fruit/veg, if you can't afford meals you should get free school meals and surely your school has a banana for you or something.
2) Clean your room - I don't just mean pick up some stuff off the floor, vacuum the floor and open windows so all the dust goes. Wipe down surfaces and make sure your school stuff is atleast accessible and you know where it is. My french teacher gave us revision resources but i lost them in my room and everyone else was cramming using that and I had nothing lol. Even if it's in one big stack just ensure you know where it is. AND MAKE SURE YOUR PENCIL CASE IS READY. in over 5 mocks i came to school without even a black pen. not good.
3) Positive mindset - i know it's cringe when you see those "believe in yourself" quotes but if you're depressed/burnt out to the point you hate yourself and see no point in continuing, ditch the nihilism and embrace the cringey inspirational quotes, it's worth it to get an ounce of your self-esteem back.
4) REVISION!!!! - Revise how you want. I use a range of rainbow-coloured highlighters to annotate war poems. Juxtaposition maybe. But if it helps you concentrate just do it! I've also been made fun of for showing up to exams with wet, crumpled pieces of paper with completely illegible writing rather than "aesthetic" organised notes like the others. But guess who gets the grade 9s? Hint: not the people who spend 8 hours writing one cursive sentence and highlight every word. I do, because I'm more focused on learning than decorating. I'm the girl who sits on the dirty ground outside to scribble away with my 5p biro while I get weird looks, because I couldn't find another place to study. I'm not saying you have to do that but what I'm saying is, now isn't the time to CARE what other people think, you NEED those grades even if it means wearing those glasses you hate so you can actually read, getting teased by people for being a nerd, or missing out on video game or youtube time.
Figure out whether you: A) revise too much and are too hard on yourself B) don't revise and procrastinate C) revise the perfect balance so your health and academics are both good
and adjust accordingly. Personally I'm person B but I'm aiming to be person C today, it's not too late. Good luck to everyone doing exams and I hope you're all taking care of yourself and others during this time too. Best of luck :-)

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A 70s stinker, big monster, off the path and more this week.
The TL;DR The Visitor: A remarkable cast is wasted in this bizarre Italian semi-sci-fi riff on The Omen, The Fury, and others. The Ruins: Absolutely riveting tourism gone wrong horror. Deathgasm: Top tier horror comedy that hits similar notes to Dead Alive. My Heart Can’t Beat Unless You Tell It To: Part family drama, part thought experiment. A look at a trio of people who are dead inside, each in their own way. The Lake: Special effects are the star of this “Thaiju” feature, but there isn’t much else to it. Moloch: Needed some edits but fans of folk horror should enjoy this Dutch offering. Lovely, Dark, and Deep: In the forests of the night, it gets credibly creepy. Low budget, but a great lead and fine visuals.
The Visitor (1979): “I can’t kill children – only the evil part.” After a psychedelic encounter on a planet with a lava lamp atmosphere, an old man lets blond space Jesus — who has been telling hairless kids about how “Commander Yahweh” slew the demonic Sateen — know that a spiritual descendant of Sateen has been reborn on Earth. Cue 70s style soundtrack, and here we go! Or would go, if anything ever happened. The film is a total mess, with bizarrely long takes of John Huston (!) and others pacing or staring or driving in one scene and rapidfire edits in another. Lance Henrikson’s (!) Ray is more robotic than Bishop, and Shelley Winters (!) and Sam Peckinpah (!!) don’t make much of a difference. Allegedly, the cast only participated to gain a free trip to Italy, which I hope they enjoyed. Huston’s distinctive voice is the film’s only redeeming quality, but you’re better off hearing it elsewhere. Gore: 1/10. Nudity: None. Tubi.
The Ruins (2008): “Aren’t you glad you came?” Iceman and Jena Malone (who had a memorable makeout session in Neon Demon) venture with their friends to some off the path Mayan ruins, where the locals welcoming in a “We wish you’d never, ever leave” way. As it turns out, I’d already seen this one long ago; hearing the “cell phone” ring immediately tipped me off. But it was very much worth a second watch, and if you haven’t seen it absolutely do so. It’s well worth the $3 and change. Then consider the aftermath. Gore: 6/10. Nudity: None. Prime rental
Deathgasm (2015): “Hail Satin” Horror comedies face the same challenge as regular comedies: keeping the laughs going after the first 15 minutes, when the dramatic plot kicks in. Tucker and Dale did this very well; Zombeavers not so much. Deathgasm, fortunately, is a lot closer to T&D, finding ways great and small to inject humor in and around the more serious scenes. And damn, what lines — I had to pause more than a few times to laugh my arse off. As a metalhead in my youth, I appreciated a lot of jokes more than I might have otherwise, but anyone with a stomach for gore and naughtiness will enjoy this one. Gore: 8/10, but it’s a funny 8/10. Nudity: Brief. Tubi
My Heart Can’t Beat Unless You Tell it To (2021): “We shouldn’t be doing the things that we’re doing.” Two siblings care for the third, who is sickly and has special nutritional requirements one might term the “Lugosi Diet.” Not heroin — the red stuff. This is only peripherally a vampire movie. It’s much more a psychological drama about caregiver fatigue, the struggle of the able to aid the disabled and how even a family full of love can collapse under the weight of their burdens. There’s no backstory given, no mythos to justify the situation, just a family struggling to do what they have to do to keep their youngest member alive. It’s good, with the leads providing a bleak window into their day-to-day existences, though a little humor would have been nice. It’s an existential, thought-provoking vignette that may linger with you. Gore: 3/10, bloodletting. Nudity: Just a man and his underwear. Screambox, which I apparently still have.
The Lake (2022): “Compose yourself. Don’t get out of the car.” I wanted a big monster flick, and this Thai production says it has one. I just hope I don’t have to wait forever for it to sho—ah, 3 minutes in and there it is. No build up at all. Huh. A fan of Bong Joon-Ho’s The Host (2006) apparently got hold of a decent budget and put together a “Thaiju” film of their own, and it’s…okay. While the editing is all over the place, it does keep the story moving, and the creatures are interesting to look at and well rendered. There are speed bump human dramas, but they don’t account for much; characters are uni-dimensional, and the film unfortunately lacks much in the way of a binding narrative. If you’re in the mood for a big beast exercise in special effects, you could do worse. Just don’t expect much else. Gore: 4/10. Nudity: None. Prime.
Moloch (2022): “You science boys, you’re uninformed.” This Dutch folk horror tells — at a modest pace — the story of Bietrik and her family, who have suffered substantial losses over the generations. Events lead her to believe that her family may be cursed, haunted by some local entity. All in all, it’s a decent movie, wrapped around its own eerie mythology and leading to a striking conclusion. There’s a scene in a field that should have been left on the cutting room floor, and the second half lacks the sense of urgency and discovery that can really carry a movie, but I’d still recommend it for the atmosphere and some fine, creepy moments. Not bad for a writedirector’s first full length feature.
Gore: 3/10. Nudity: None. Trivia: While Moloch has often been thought of as a deity to whom children were sacrificed, more recent research suggests it was instead a type of sacrifice, one that involved children and was performed for various gods in the Levant, including the god of the Hebrews. Shudder
Lovely, Dark, and Deep (2023): “You’ve taken from us.” Georgina Campbell (Barbarian) is a forest ranger taking her first 90-day assignment in the deepest part of the woods in her fictional park. We see her settle in, go on multi-day walkabouts, and wrestle with a loss in her past. It’s a slow, scenic build to the weirdness, but it snowballs quickly. There’s a “walking simulator” aspect that follows which may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but Campbell kept me invested with her performance. While the film follows some tropes (things there one moment and gone the next, for example), it turns others on its head. While “in the forest” stories can go very different ways (as The Ritual, Gaia,and In the Earth demonstrate), I finished LD&D thinking of it as a folk horror. I’m curious if you agree. Gore: 5/10 for some red moments. Nudity: None. Trivia: The title comes from a Robert Frost poem you may have encountered in school. Tubi
What fine or forgettable flicks have been on your list this week?

Claude Debussy, a prominent figure in Impressionist music, revolutionized harmony, melody, and cultural perceptions in music through his innovative compositions. Let's break down his impact statistically:

1. Harmony:
   
   • Debussy's harmonic language moved away from traditional functional harmony, embracing modal and pentatonic scales, whole-tone scales, and parallel chords.
   • Statistical analysis could show a decrease in the prevalence of traditional tonic-dominant relationships and an increase in the use of non-functional harmonic progressions.
   • Debussy's harmonic vocabulary expanded the tonal palette available to composers, influencing subsequent generations of musicians.
2. Melodies:
   
   • Debussy's melodies often featured fluid contours, incorporating elements of pentatonic and whole-tone scales.
   • Statistical analysis might reveal a departure from conventional melodic structures, with a focus on atmospheric, evocative lines rather than traditional, singable melodies.
   • His melodies often blurred the lines between melody and accompaniment, contributing to the overall impressionistic aesthetic of his music.
3. Culture:
   
   • Debussy's compositions challenged traditional notions of form, structure, and tonality, reflecting the changing cultural landscape of the late 19th and early 20th centuries.
   • His rejection of German Romanticism and embrace of French musical traditions helped to establish a distinct national identity in French music.
   • Through his use of exoticism and non-Western musical elements, Debussy contributed to the broader cultural fascination with the exotic and the mysterious during the fin de siècle period.

Statistical analysis of Debussy's compositions could provide insights into the frequency of specific harmonic progressions, melodic contours, and stylistic features. By examining patterns and trends within his music, researchers can better understand his unique contributions to the development of music harmony, melody, and cultural expression.

• Prelude to the Afternoon of a Faun (Prélude à l'après-midi d'un faune): This orchestral tone poem, inspired by Stéphane Mallarmé's poem, is a quintessential example of Debussy's impressionistic style. Its dreamy atmosphere, fluid melodies, and innovative harmonic language evoke the sensual world of the faun.
• La Mer: Debussy's symphonic sketches for orchestra, La Mer, depict the ever-changing moods of the sea. Through innovative orchestration and harmonic exploration, Debussy creates a vivid sonic portrait of the sea's power and beauty.
• Clair de Lune: This piano piece, part of the Suite Bergamasque, is one of Debussy's most famous works. Its gentle, shimmering harmonies and delicate melodies evoke the moonlit tranquility of a nighttime landscape.

1. Cultural Examples:
   • French National Identity: Debussy's rejection of German Romanticism and his embrace of French musical traditions helped to establish a distinct national identity in French music. His compositions, with their evocative depictions of French landscapes and folklore, contributed to a sense of cultural pride and nationalism.
   • Impressionist Movement: Debussy's music is often associated with the Impressionist movement in painting, which sought to capture the fleeting impressions of light and color. Like the Impressionist painters, Debussy focused on atmosphere, texture, and suggestion rather than precise detail, creating music that is more about mood and impression than literal representation.
   • Cultural Exchange and Exoticism: Debussy's fascination with non-Western music and exoticism is evident in works like Pagodes from Estampes and La soirée dans Grenade from Iberia. These pieces incorporate elements of Javanese gamelan music and Spanish flamenco, reflecting the broader cultural fascination with the exotic and the mysterious during the fin de siècle period.

Y’all, I’m really not sure what’s still around. This list is somewhat edited, but please still make sure to check on all the regular events before you make big plans – I may have missed something.
Events are listed by the day. Events that happen every week appear first, one time stuff after that. If you have anything you’d like people to know about, comment here or message me and I’ll add it in. If you’d like further info about any of the events, look it up! I usually don’t have any extra to add.
Large Scale, Ongoing, and Multi-Day Events

Local Running, Walking, and Biking Info: https://troubleafoot.blogspot.com/
Guided Paddling Outings all around the area: https://www.facebook.com/hsmithoutdoors
Tallahassee Film Society Showings: https://www.tallahasseefilms.com/tickets/
Book Clubs for all tastes: https://www.facebook.com/midtownreadeevents
Live Theater:

• Making Light Productions: https://www.makinglightproductions.org/
  
• Theatre Tallahassee: https://theatretallahassee.org/
  
• Mickee Faust Club: https://www.mickeefaust.com/
  
• Monticello Opera House: https://www.monticellooperahouse.org/
  
• FSU School of Theatre: https://theatre.fsu.edu/productions/
  
• Young Actors Theatre: https://www.youngactorstheatre.com/
  
• Quincy Music Theatre: https://quincymusictheatre.com/
  
• Tallahassee Hispanic Theater: https://tallahasseehispanictheater.wordpress.com/
  

OutdooFarmer’s Markets:

• Lake Ella Grower's Market: Wednesday and Saturday, 11am-2pm. You can always find organic vendors, and foragers: The Holistic Cannabis Community, Artzi Farms, Hickory Nut Gifts, and others. Including Pita Queen! Farmer's Market Nutrition Program Coupons gladly accepted!
  
• Tallahassee Downtown Market: Saturdays, 10am-2pm, Park Ave Parks. Vendors display their arts and fine crafts, jewelry, handmade soap, pottery, Fresh from Florida produce, hand-raised beef and pork, fresh baked bread, jams and jellies, and honey. Live music from different local musicians every Saturday.
  
• Frenchtown Heritage Market: 524 N MLK Jr Blvd. Third Saturday of the month 10am to 2pm. Come grow community and support your local farmers and makers, while you get your groceries for the week! Don’t forget! We match SNAP/EBT, so you DOUBLE your money to go towards locally grown fresh fruits and vegetables! If the guy with the pineapple is there, get it. This is currently only happening on the third Saturday of the month for the next few months while road work is completed.
  
• Tallahassee Farmers Market: 2904 Kerry Forest Pkwy, Saturdays, 8am to Noon. Come see us at Tallahassee's longest-running farmers market! We are a year-round market, featuring local farms and vendors that provide the best seasonal produce, meats, baked goods, and more. We welcome you and your whole family (leashed pets included) to come out and meet your local farmers! Ample parking is available between our lot and the shopping center lot next door (by Red Elephant). Come early for the best selection.
  

THURSDAY, 5/16

• The Hub at Feather Oaks: Bingo. 6pm
  
• Dreamland BBQ: Weekly Open Blues Jam. If you'd like to sing, please bring your own mic. 6pm
  
• Honest Living Vape: Chess-Master Thursdays . Beginners and experts, join us every Thursday from 6-9 for Chess-Master Thursdays. All ages. Bring your board or play ours! Tournaments coming soon! 6pm
  
• Lake Tribe: Trivia. 7pm
  
• Takko Market Square: Bingo Night. 7pm
  
• The Getaway Grille and Bar: Karaoke with Jared Walker. 7pm
  
• Amicus Brewing: Trivia. 7pm
  
• Smitty's Taphouse: Trivia Lab Thursdays. Teams of 6 or fewer players can compete for $30 / $20 / $10 Prizes + The Golden MacGuffin prize table! New format! Interactive smartphone answering for your comfort and safety! 6 Fun Rounds - 42 Total Questions. 7:30pm
  
• Studio D: Bachata Fever. We always have a bachata workshop at 8 pm before Bachata Fever. We dance afterwards to the sounds of DJ Bacharod. The class is at 8 pm and Bachata Fever will start at 930 pm. Many times people are learning in class and may feel uncomfortable social dancing while they are still learning moves. We have a welcoming environment so stay and have fun and dance with everyone. That is how we learn. 8pm/Class $5/Bachata Fever $5.
  
• The Sound Bar: Comedy Night. 8pm
  
• Finnegans Wake: Open Mic. 8:30pm
  
• Brass Tap in Midtown: Karaoke with DJ Rah. 9pm
  
• 926: Karaoke. 9pm
  
• Bird’s: Karaoke with Nathan. 9pm
  

• Fire Bettys: Slasher Bash. This week we'll be showing: "Zombeavers". Prepare for an evening of horrific hilarity with comedy narration and devilish drinking games!🍻 Hosted by local comedians. 8pm/21+
  
• Blue Tavern: Seep's Gumbo Nation ft. Shanice Richards. 8pm
  

FRIDAY, 5/17

• Blue Tavern: Happy Hour with Steve Malono. 5pm
  
• Lake Tribe Brewing: Flannel Fridays with Live Music. 6pm
  
• Hobbit West: Friday Night Dart Tournament. Anyone can Enter! Sign ups at 7:30, Darts fly at 8:00/$10 entry fee
  
• Ouzts Too: Karaoke with DJ Nathan. Best karaoke DJ in town. 8pm
  
• Just One More: Karaoke with DJ Rah. 9pm-11pm/21+
  
• 926: The Hot Friday Night Party and Drag Show. 9pm/$5/18+
  

• The Hub at Feather Oaks: Rachel Hillman. 5:30pm
  
• Lake Tribe: Ben Wentworth. 5:30pm
  
• Amicus Brewing: The Tanglers. 6pm
  
• The Getaway Grille and Bar: One Year Anniversary Celebration Featuring Queen of Hearts Band. 6pm
  
• Southwood Golf Club: The Rhythm Remedy. 6:30pm
  
• Goodwood: The Big Bash Havana Nights presented by Brent Hartsfield. The Big Bash is Big Brothers Big Sisters of the Big Bend's signature fundraising gala of the year and directly supports the agency's youth mentoring programs. Guests will enjoy Cuban Cuisine, champagne mojitos, cigars, flights, classic cars, photo opportunities, silent auction vacation packages, LIVE music and dancing, and an exciting LIVE salsa dance performance from 12 community volunteers! The event is a tremendous networking opportunity for Tallahassee's top business professionals, local community leaders and philanthropists to come together to enjoy an evening to celebrate the achievements of Big Brothers Big Sisters. 7pm
  
• Blue Tavern: Wil Fulkerson Jazz Night. 8pm
  
• House of Music: Belly Dancing: Journey From The Nile To The Tigris. Habibi, join us on a groovy carpet ride across ancient deserts: Disco Iskandar embarks on a voyage of belly dance, folklore, cinema, and history in a theatrical dance production, JOURNEY FROM THE NILE TO THE TIGRIS. Highlighting the prominence of belly dance in films of the Middle East from the 1940s through the 1970s, we present a live showcase exhibiting dances from Egypt, Turkey, Iraq, and beyond. It goes so much deeper than you think. Hookahs! Swords! Rhinestones, literally everywhere! This cross section of entertainment and education is the culmination of years of obsessive learning, two national tours, and travels to Egypt & Lebanon. JOURNEY FROM THE NILE TO THE TIGRIS is a trip unlike any other-- where the Middle East meets Vegas. This show’s cast is Gabi Corazon, Gia Bee, Liz Azi, Olya Clark, Vania Ojeda, director Veronica Lynn, and special guest star Omaris! 8pm/$15/21+
  
• The Sound Bar: The Old Schoolers. 8pm
  
• Vino Beano: Your Scumbag Neighbors. 8pm
  
• The Bark: Medians, No Yeah, Sleep John B, and Cloud Storage. 8pm
  

SATURDAY, 5/18

• Brinkley Glen Park: Invasive Plant Removal. Join Master Gardener Volunteers at this weekly invasive plant removal event. This is a great way to learn to ID our invasive plant species and how to remove them. We recommend wearing long pants and sleeves, closed-toed shoes, gloves, a hat and mosquito spray. Bring gardening tools such as hand clippers, loppers, trowels, etc. if you have them. We are removing coral ardisia bushes and berries, nandina, tung trees, Tradescantia flumenensis, cat's claw vine, winged yam, Japanese climbing fern, skunkvine and more. Directions: The best way to get there is to take Meridian Rd to Waverly Rd, go to the next intersection and turn left onto Abbotsford Way, then turn left at the next road called Woodside Dr. At the stop sign turn left onto Lothian. Lothian ends in a cul-de-sac and there is a sign that says Brinkley Glen Park. 8:30am-11:30am
  
• Gamescape: Saturday Gaming. Gamescape has relocated from Railroad Square to the Huntington Oaks Plaza (Suite 302, next to the Library) at N Monroe St and Fred George Rd. Open gaming tables are available. Noon-6pm
  
• Duke’s and Dottie’s: Line Dancing Plus Lessons. 7pm/21+
  
• Bird’s Oyster Shack: Laughterday Night Fever. * Join us every Saturday at Bird's Aphrodisiac Oyster Shack for a free comedy show!* 8:30pm
  
• 926: Latin Night. Dance to the irresistible beats of Zeus and prepare to be dazzled by a spectacular drag show at midnight. It's more than a party, it's an experience. 9:30pm/$10 21+, $15 under 21
  

• Crawfordville: Big Bend Biodiversity Tour. See why our area is so ecologically incredible! Get up close and personal with creatures and plants galore. Join expert guide and outdoor educator, Ryan Means for this limited opportunity to tour the Apalachicola Lowlands Preserve. The day-long trip stops at points along the way to the privately-owned preserve nestled deep in the Apalachicola National Forest near Sumatra, FL. Explore the longleaf pine ecosystem, pitcher plant bogs, ephemeral wetlands, and blackwater streams - home to some threatened and endangered species. Learn what makes the Florida Panhandle one of the five richest biodiversity hotspots in North America. Perfect tour for photographers, outdoor enthusiasts and ecologists. $75 tour fee includes round-trip transportation (from 46 Kinsey Rd, Crawfordville, FL) , complimentary beverages, and supports efforts to preserve the incredible biodiversity of the Southeastern Coastal Plain. Spaces limited. Register here: https://coastalplains.networkforgood.com/events/71083-big-bend-biodiversity-tour for full details. 8am
  
• Dreamland BBQ: Rock Type One to None. Let's rock to find a cure for Type 1 Diabetes! The Unicorn Wranglers are back on Saturday, May 18th at Dreamland BBQ in Tallahassee, Florida for the 2024 "Rock One to None" show. This show is benefiting the Juvenile Diabetes Research Fund (JDRF) and will feature musical guests Midnight Caravan, Fallen Timber, and the Unicorn Wranglers. The show starts at 4 pm and runs until 7 pm at Dreamland BBQ in Music Alley, and is open to all ages. While the show is free, we encourage all rockers attending to donate to the cause. You can contribute at the show by visiting our donation station or by heading over to our online Unicorn Wranglers team page. Together, as one big mosh pit, we can help cure Type 1 Diabetes. 3pm
  
• The Hub at Feather Oaks: Ethan Kyllonen. 4pm
  
• Amicus Brewing: Beza Alford and Rev. Dr. Sheldon Steen. 5pm
  
• Lake Tribe: Flamingo Party. 6pm
  
• The Getaway Grille and Bar: Billy Rigsby Band. 6pm
  
• Vino Beano: Brett & "Dangerous" Dave. 6pm
  
• Salty Dawg: Hot Mess. 6:30pm
  
• La Tiendita: Rhys Bennett & the Gringos as Vontade. Join us for an energetic evening filled with the vibrant sounds of Latin music, Brazilian beats, and jazz rhythms. Our local band, Rhys Bennett & the Gringos, will transform into the versatile ensemble Vontade, treating you to a delightful mix of rancheras, bossa nova, and more! Whether you're a seasoned dancer or a newcomer to the dance floor, you're in for a fantastic time at one of Tallahassee's hidden gems. Immerse yourself in a night of cultural fusion and musical celebration that is sure to create lasting memories! 6:30pm
  
• The Sound Bar: Tillman & Taff. 7pm
  
• Island Wings: Midnight Caravan. 7pm
  
• The Bark: Saturnalia, Brass Wizard, Van Season, and Psycho Tropical. 8pm
  
• Fire Bettys: 80's Video Dance Party. 8pm
  
• Just One More: One Eyed JAK. 9pm
  

SUNDAY, 5/19

• Bicycle House: Sunday Ride. Ride at 10:30 AM from Bicycle House. We will ride the Cascades trail to the St Marks trail and down to Wakulla station and return, about 31 miles. Ride speed is 12 to 14 mph, with periodic regroups. Vernon Bailey is the ride leader. Vernon is a new CCC member who’s been biking for 50 years enjoys riding with small groups and weekend touring. 10am
  
• E Peck Greene Park (Behind the LeRoy Collins Library): Food Not Bombs Free Mealshare. We offer free vegetarian/vegan food, water, coffee, personal care & hygiene products, bus passes, and clothing when we have some available to those in need. Contact foodnotbombstally@gmail.com to find out about getting involved. Noon-2pm
  
• LeRoy Collins Library: Tallahassee Go Club Meetings. Come play the captivating ancient game of Go, also known as Baduk, with some friendly games and discussions. Beginners welcome. Visit https://www.tallahasseegoclub.com for more information. 1pm
  
• Gamescape: Pokémon League. Come learn, play, and trade with the Pokémon Trading Card Game and the Pokémon video games! We LOVE seeing new players, so come learn how to play! We play both the Trading Card Game and the Video Game casually and competitively. The store offers lots of different seating arrangements to meet our group's needs, as well as food, drinks, and Pokémon products for purchase. We are also hold regular, officially sanctioned tournaments for Pokémon Trading Card Game and Video Game Competitions! 2-4pm
  
• The Plant: Open Jam. All instruments, all players welcome. 4pm-9pm
  
• Pedro’s: Mariachi Clasico. 6pm
  
• Fermentation Lounge: Open Mic Night Hosted by Conor Churchill. 7pm
  

• Ology Powermill: Marauders Market. Noon
  
• The Hub at Feather Oaks: The Barber Bros. 1pm-4pm
  
• Goodwood: Ice Cream Social. Get ready for a spectacular day of family fun at Goodwood Museum & Gardens! Treat your taste buds to a family fun day of FREE ice cream, FREE crafts for the kids, FREE activities, and more, all on the beautiful Goodwood grounds. Family-friendly musical entertainment will be provided by The Safari Man, who will have everyone tapping their feet and dancing along to his whimsical tunes. 1pm
  
• Common Ground Books: Contemporary Queer Poetry Book Club: Time is a Mother. This month, we’ll be reading “Time is a Mother” by Ocean Vuong. “In this deeply intimate second poetry collection, Ocean Vuong searches for life among the aftershocks of his mother's death, embodying the paradox of sitting within grief while being determined to survive beyond it. Vivid, brave and propulsive, Vuong's poems contend with personal loss, the meaning of family, and the value of joy in a perennially fractured American spirit. The author of the critically acclaimed poetry collection Night Sky with Exit Wounds, winner of the 2016 Whiting Award, the 2017 T. S. Eliot Prize and a 2019 MacArthur fellow, Vuong writes directly to our humanity without losing sight of the current moment. Bold and prescient, and a testament to tenderness in the face of violence, Time is a Mother is a return and a forging-forth all at once.” 6pm
  

MONDAY, 5/20

• Just One More: Bingo. 5pm-6:30pm
  
• The Getaway Grille and Bar: Margarita Monday, Open-Mic Night hosted by The Saltwater Cowboy. 5:30pm-8pm
  
• American Legion Hall: Cha Cha - Weekly Lessons. 6:15pm/$5
  
• Hangar 38: Bingo. 6:45pm
  
• Vino Beano: Tipsy Trivia. 7pm
  

TUESDAY, 5/21

• Blue Tavern: Happy Hour. 5pm
  
• The Getaway Grille: Tuesday Night Bikes and Trikes. 6pm
  
• Crafty Crab: BOOMIN' Karaoke. 7pm
  
• Gamescape: Hobby Night. Slay the grey together! Join your fellow gamers and turn your pile of grey miniatures into a battle ready army. Need some painting tips? Feel free to ask at hobby night. You can bring any miniature for any game to paint. 7pm
  
• Ology Midtown: Jazz Jam Sessions. 7pm
  
• Island Wings: Trivia. 7pm
  
• Brass Tap in Midtown: Trivia. 1st Tuesday of the month is General Knowledge with rotating themes the rest of the month. 7pm
  
• House of Music: Tuesday Trivia & Karaoke. 7pm
  
• American Legion Hall: Tallahassee Swing Band Tuesday Night Dance. 7:30pm
  
• Fire Bettys: Comedy Night. 8pm
  
• Poor Pauls: Trivia. 8pm/21+
  
• Blue Tavern: Bluesday Tuesday with Bill Ricci. Every Tuesday is Blues Day @ the Blue Tavern and Blues Meets Girl is a Tallahassee favorite. This perfect, intimate venue provides just what you need for both a mid-week break and authentic blues music experience. 8pm/$5
  
• 4th Quarter: Professor Jim's Tuesday Night Trivia. Popular for a reason! 8pm
  
• Argonaut Coffee: Trivia Tuesday. 8pm
  
• The Sound Bar: Karaoke. 8pm
  
• Fire Betty’s: Open Mic Comedy Night. 8pm/21+
  
• 926: Tacos and Trivia. 9pm
  

• Tallahassee Junior Museum: Basic Blacksmith Skills Program. Light your curiosity at our upcoming Basic Blacksmith Skills Program! Join our resident blacksmith, Michael Murphy, as he shares his history of being a Smitty. Participants will be able to keep the fire going, sling a hammer, and throw knives during this two hour lecture program. This is an outdoor event. Must preregister online at tallahasseemuseum.org/events. This program is free for members and regular admission price for non-members. 10am

WEDNESDAY, 5/22

• Sugar and Spice Tally: Game Night. Join us every Wednesday Night for community game night. Bring your own or use ours! Let me know if you need to reserve space for a large group. Free to attend! 5pm
  
• Goodwood: Wonderful Wednesday. 6pm/$5
  
• Level 8 Rooftop Lounge: Trivia. 6pm
  
• La Florida Coffee & Wine: Trivia Night. 6pm
  
• The Great Games Library: Open Game Night. 6pm/free
  
• American Legion Hall: Sue Boyd Country Western and More Dance Class. Session 2 - Beginner 6:30 to 7:45 pm What: East Coast Swing and Waltz. Cost: $8.00 per person. Wear comfortable shoes you can turn in. 7:45 to 8:15 - Practice dance with paid admission. 8:15 to 9:30: Intermediate - 2 Step and WCS. $8.00 per person or $13.00 for both classes. Vaccines are required. Face masks are optional. Changing partners is optional. 6:30pm
  
• Perry Lynn’s Smokehouse in Quincy: Wed Night Open Mic w/ Steven Ritter and Friends. 6:30pm
  
• Hangar 38: Trivia. 6:45pm
  
• Proof: Trivia. 7pm
  
• Vino Beano: Wine Bingo. 7pm
  
• Fermentation Lounge: Trivia. 7pm
  
• Blue Tavern: Wednesday Open Mic with Doc Russell. The open mic night that has run continuously for almost 20 years, once housed at the Warehouse, lives on at the Blue Tavern. Doc Russell continues as the host with the most. Sign up starts at 7:45pm/free to attend
  
• House of Music: Bar Bingo! Free to Play & Late Night Karaoke. 7pm
  
• Fire Betty’s: Karaoke! 8pm/21+/free
  
• Dukes and Dotties: College Night and Line Dancing Lessons. 8pm
  
• Finnegans Wake: Trivia. 8pm
  
• The Sound Bar: Open Mic Night. 8pm
  
• The Bark: Karaoke with DJ Nathan. Best karaoke DJ in town. 9pm
  
• Peppers: Karaoke. 9pm
  
• 926: Dragged Out Wednesday. 10pm
  

Monday is the first day of the work week that many people dread. Not all people dread it, but some. Let's take a look into the Numerology of Monday to decode the energy and what it can be used for to work with it and not against it.
M - this is the 13th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 4. The energy of 1 is action and the energy of 3 is connecting with others through collaboration. This puts a focus on responsibilities and for most people, it's a work or school day which connects with this. Although it is about being responsible, it's still the energy of 4 which is mellow and controlled energy. O - this is the 15th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 6 which is about using your creativity constructively to take care of the tasks or duties you need to take care of. 6 is the number of beauty, duty, and routine. N - 14th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 5. This is about using your energy to be responsible and making space for enjoyment while doing so. 14 is a karmic number, but not when used correctly. As a karmic number, 14 is about someone who ditched their responsibilities and now have to deal with some challeneges(5). Proper use of this energy is using it for creative purposes. D - 4th letter vibrating at the purest energy of 4 which is about calmness, caution, and security. A - vibrating at 1 as the first letter of the alphabet, this is about action and energy. Y - The 25th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 7, but through cooperation with others(2) and compassion for others(2) and with the use of creativity (5) or even humor(5). Big lover energy as 5 can point to romance and 2 can point to soulmates.
Monday full numerology comes down to 8 and 8 can represent long and drawn out processes, wait times, and pressure. The dreadful energy can be moreso due to this 8 energy. People can work with this energy by being patient as 8 points to tedious tasks. With this insight, you can now simply start expected a little time in between things and pacing yourself. It can seem like a long day or your duties may be plentiful.
This is a day best utilized in a constructive (8) way with the use of wisdom and calculation(7). The 7 is the soul urge influence of Monday based on the vowels. 2 vowels A and O which equals 7. Being calculating and seeking depth will allow you to master the energy of Monday. Use this day to get the most done with your projects or workloads.
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𝐌𝐘 𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐍 𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐋𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐂𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐂 𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐊𝐒 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐘𝐎𝐔:

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𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐌𝐘 𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐒 & 𝐏𝐀𝐘𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐎𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒:

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1. Terza Rima: A poetic form consisting of tercets (three-line stanzas) with interwoven rhymes, often used by Dante in "The Divine Comedy."
   
2. Clerihew: A humorous and whimsical poem of four lines, with irregular meter and rhymes, focusing on a person, often the poet.
   
3. Triolet: An eight-line poem with a specific rhyme scheme (ABaAabAB), featuring repeated lines.
   
4. Ballad: A narrative poem often set to music, telling a story with a strong rhythm and rhyme.
   
5. Renga: A collaborative form of Japanese linked-verse poetry, typically composed by multiple poets in alternating stanzas.
   
6. Senryu: Similar to haiku, but focuses on human nature and emotions rather than nature itself.
   
7. Paradelle: A complex and rare form of poetry that repeats lines with variations, creating a challenging structure.
   
8. Golden Shovel: A form where each word in a line of an existing poem is used as the end word in a line of the new poem.
   
9. Haibun: A combination of prose and haiku, often describing a journey or a nature experience.
   
10. Villancico: A medieval Spanish poetic form often used in songs and carols, characterized by repetition and refrains.
    
11. Palindrome Poetry: A poem that reads the same backward as forward, creating a mirrored effect.
    
12. Blackout Poetry: Creating poetry by selectively redacting or highlighting words from an existing text, often creating a visual element.
    
13. Tetractys: A five-line poem with a syllable count of 1, 2, 3, 4, 10, creating a pyramid shape.
    
14. Rubaiyat: A Persian form of poetry with quatrains, typically written in iambic pentameter with the rhyme scheme AABA.
    
15. Fibonacci Poem: A poem following the Fibonacci sequence for syllable counts in each line (0, 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, etc.).
    
16. Calligram: A visual poem in which the words or letters are arranged in a shape that reflects the poem's subject.
    
17. Shape Poetry: Poems that take on a visual shape related to their subject, enhancing the overall meaning.
    
18. Tanka Prose: A prose poem followed by a tanka, combining the concise nature of prose with the emotional depth of tanka.
    
19. Found Poetry: Creating poetry from existing texts or found materials, rearranging and recontextualizing words.
    
20. Blitz Poem: A form of poetry with a rapid, stream-of-consciousness style, using repetition and wordplay.
    
21. Sevenling: A seven-line poem with specific guidelines, including three lines with three elements, and a concluding statement in one line.
    
22. Pantun: A Malay poetic form with quatrains, featuring an interlocking rhyme scheme between stanzas.
    
23. Cento: A collage-like poem composed entirely of lines from other poems.
    
24. Cinquain Chain: Connecting multiple cinquains to create a longer poem or narrative.
    
25. Rhyme Royal: A seven-line stanza with a specific rhyme scheme (ABABBCC), used by Geoffrey Chaucer.
    
26. Haiga: A combination of haiku and visual art, where an image complements the haiku.
    
27. Minute Poem: A strict 60-syllable poem with a 8-4-4-4 structure and specific rhyme scheme (aabb).
    
28. Nonet: A nine-line poem with a descending syllable count in each line, often 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1.
    
29. Tanka Tumble: A series of linked tanka poems, creating a flowing narrative.
    
30. Dramatic Monologue: A poem in which a character speaks directly to an audience, revealing their thoughts and emotions.
    

Hey there! Hope the word "wife" doesn't scare you off. I'll get straight to the point here; I'm trying to meet someone who we could build a beautiful relationship, perhaps start off as friends, learn about each other and eventually level up to phone calls and chats late into the night. Let's lovingly make fun of each other, tease each other, and laugh together. Good morning/night messages and poems. Let's make a bedtime routine together. I date to marry, so that'll be my goal. But... it's ok if we aren't compatible or we just slowly fall off. That's ok!
Here's a few trivial things about me; • There's no such thing as over communicating • I love animals (except wasps. They can go to hell) • I am getting into baking and cooking and I'm confident I can make better chocolate chip cookies than you! • I have a job • l have a car • I have a bachelors • I have a small kitten who is my handsome lil guy • I enjoy working with hands. Building or fixing things • my favorite color is phthalo green • I have a twisted sense of humor • I don't get involved in politics • I'm single, I don't have children. • I am the oldest in my family • I am light skinned • I speak Russian, Ukrainian, a little Polish, and a little Spanish too.
Here's two truths and a lie about me: • I have called Barnes and Noble and asked if they had books in stock. • I have seen a UFO • I believe that pizza belongs on pineapple
I hope our interests align and we get to chat sometime!
Ok bai 🌹

I was raised a catholic but they do not believe in reincarnation. I have long ways to go in terms of religion but I absolutely believe in God and Jesus. However, I am very much so intimidated by the thought of God and death. I have always dealt with this feeling of derealization, like I am unreal in this life, but at the same time, a familiarity with the world. I feel a deep connection with the past, particularly with the 1800s-1900s. Despite this, I am unsure of how many lives my soul may have lived. I have not had the privilege of experiencing past life regression therapy. I am not sure whether to trust it, though I have felt drawn to it since I have learned of its existence. I have been afraid of falling subject to scams, so I’ve avoided many therapists and fortune tellers. I once heard a woman a couple years ago in a restaurant talking about her past life she learned about through a therapy session but couldn’t make too many words out. Still, I was shocked and felt envious of her experience, wishing I could learn about my past life/lives. This was much after I’d first learned about past life regression therapy.
I’ve been fascinated with the whole concept of reincarnation since a young child and was told by my mother and some others I was wise beyond my years. I picked up English fairly quickly. However, when I turned 17 or 18, I saw a picture in black and white of Stralsund, Germany. I recognized the fact that it was a picture in Germany though I was not educated about Germany in the past, nor hardly a single thing on world war 2. I somehow knew this picture was from Germany and it brought a very strange feeling to me deep down. From then on, I researched pictures and towns in Germany as well as the language. I found the language easier to learn than Spanish. I feel deeply connected to Germany. I’ve had various dreams of villages, and a certain church that included a cemetery, though I am not sure which country this is from. I looked in the mirror and suddenly thought of the name “Laura” and since then have felt that my past life name from a certain time was Laura. I feel a deep connection to church bells and the feeling of soft grass beneath my feet as well. I often have a restless sensation and a feeling that I am not truly home. It saddens me deeply. I’ve had many visions that I cannot explain, and was wondering if anyone could provide me with some insight. Anything.
Though I have adapted to many things within this time, I feel that my soul belongs elsewhere. I feel as though I am living behind a mask to become accepted and that it is not the real me. I have a set in stone belief that i want to be buried under the ground instead of cremated. I am very argumentative about it. I am fond of old fashioned poetry, fascinated by gothic gravestones, and gothic architecture. I long to be one with the earth and have written poems about it. I’ve cried when thinking about reincarnation and things from the 1800s-1900s. I don’t feel new to this earth but at the time feel clueless about so many things in this century. I feel so much anxiety that never seems to leave my side. It is the most loyal companion I’ve had since I was born. I was unfortunately born with anxiety that has held me back immensely from discovering so many things about myself, including this aspect. I have considered myself a complex individual with an old soul for many years, and am unsure of what to do about it??
I wonder constantly if someone has ever felt a similar way. I feel that I’ll never find a soul that understands what I’m going though, and I am sick of feeling alone in this cold world.

I don’t know how well this will be received here, but unfortunately I am beyond desperate at this point, and I figured I would ask you all for help, since there seems to be a solid contingent of WFH people in this community. Perhaps one of you will be able to help me out.
TLDR: I’m desperately searching for a remote job, in technical writing or adjacent fields. I know how to use MadCap Flare, Confluence, JIRA, and some Git commands. I can send my full resume on request.
Longer version: I graduated in May 2023 and it’s been bleak ever since. I have a degree in English and a minor in Biology (and knowledge of Spanish). I’ve had my eyes on technical writing as a field since my freshman year of college as a way to combine both my love and skill in the sciences and in writing, but also because even then before the pandemic, technical writing was flagged as a career with a lot of remote work opportunities. I have chronic migraines that require me to spend a lot of time in the dark, and so it was important that I look for career paths that have the best chance at accommodating it.
I did a remote internship in technical writing for a software company that I absolutely adored and was successful in. It was in this position that I learned the above softwares: MadCap Flare, Confluence, JIRA, Git. I’ve been looking and applying for similar positions since I graduated, to no avail. I have won multiple awards from national and international writing competitions, so I do know how to write.
I’ve been working as a legal assistant, which is thankfully remote, but it is part-time and minimum wage with no benefits or PTO. It is not enough for me to move out and support myself on my own, which I’m looking to do as I am currently living with a family member who takes no precautions. Moreover, I really don’t like the work (but that’s far secondary to pay).
So please, if you or anyone else has any leads on a remote, technical writing job or something adjacent, please please PLEASE help me. In exchange for any help I can write you a poem, crochet you something, whatever. Apologies to put this here, but I am beyond the point of being desperate enough to beg for help from this community.

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9 hours away from now

1. Clerihew:

- *Definition:* A whimsical, four-line biographical poem with irregular meter. - *Example:* Craft a clerihew about a famous historical figure or a friend with a humorous twist. 

1. Quatrain:

- *Definition:* A stanza or poem consisting of four lines, often rhymed. - *Example:* Write a quatrain reflecting on the beauty of simplicity in everyday life. 

1. Double Dactyl:

- *Definition:* A light, humorous poem with strict structure and two quatrains. - *Example:* Create a double dactyl capturing a comical moment or character. 

1. Terzanelle:

- *Definition:* A hybrid of the terza rima and villanelle, with 19 lines and a specific rhyme scheme. - *Example:* Craft a terzanelle exploring the cyclical nature of seasons and life. 

1. Haibun:

- *Definition:* A combination of prose and haiku, often describing a journey or experience. - *Example:* Write a haibun narrating a meaningful travel experience, complemented by haikus. 

1. Golden Shovel:

- *Definition:* A form where the last word of each line is taken from an existing poem. - *Example:* Create a golden shovel poem using a line from your favorite poem or song. 

1. Villancico:

- *Definition:* A Spanish poetic and musical form, often festive and celebratory. - *Example:* Craft a villancico capturing the joy of a special occasion or holiday. 

1. Tercet:

- *Definition:* A stanza or poem consisting of three lines. - *Example:* Write a tercet expressing the beauty of resilience in the face of adversity. 

1. Sevenling:

- *Definition:* A seven-line poem with a specific pattern and often narrative in nature. - *Example:* Compose a sevenling reflecting on a vivid childhood memory. 

1. Palindrome Poetry:

- *Definition:* A poem that reads the same backward as forward. - *Example:* Write a palindrome poem exploring the balance between chaos and order.