We recently noticed damp getting in so asked roofers to do a survey... when doing the survey they said that instead of just replacing tiles they'd need to replace the battens as they were rotten (they took me up the ladder to show me, and this was not unexpected given the house is ~100 years old and not in great condition).
The house has a chalet style roof (so lots of slopes and valleys), with clay pantile tiles, that has a 2d footprint of around 10m x 15m (sold as a 5 bed house; but realisticly more of a 3 bed & 1 box room).
The quote for replacing all battens, removing and later refitting tiles (replacing any damaged with like for like), replacing up to 5 rotten rafters, and scaffolding hire came to £26,000; more than I'd suspected from info I'd found online; but then this is an old house with a complex roof.
After work started I was told that all of the entire roof's wooden structure would need replacing as it was also rotten and had woodworm (again, I saw evidence; those facts are true)... and was quoted an extra £36,000 (on top of the existing £26K) for all of this to be replaced; justified as there's lots of custom carpentry involved, as well as fitting new insultation to meet modern building regulations.
At this point, most of the roof is open, and I'm being pushed to make a decision quickly so we can get in materials to secure the roof before eod / before the weekend when materials are harder to come by.
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Do these costs sound reasonable given it's an old and complex building (though not a mansion by any means)? So far I've only committed to the initial £26K. Any advice welcome. Thanks in advance.
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So as title says I'm trying to make the description of my gallery instead be more like a positive quote generator and in concept it should be very simple code... But the biggest issue is neopets banning the use of any use of document in their descriptions due to it containing the word "cum" in it and I've failed to find anything online giving a replacement. Any help with this would be greatly appreciated as I'm very new to html and I really wanna do this little gimmick so I could stand out more, thank you :)

"We don't want to misuse this technology. This technology is great. It's not a track and seek, it's not a surveillance type of thing. It's more of an intelligence gathering thing from our side. It gives us the tools to be able to identify what's going on," said Maj. Donald Boeckman, who doesn't think we know that intelligence gathering and surveillance are synonymous.
Quote from this article https://www.wdrb.com/news/technology-pilot-program-louisville-police-looking-to-add-drones-to-boost-safety/article_fee33d14-1395-11ef-ae96-7360e8d0e32a.html

After spending months/yrs/days with someone who promised this/that or who convinced us that they are a dependable friend /companion /lovecoworkeacquaintance/parent when the same person turns their back on us overnight ,becomes obnoxiously disrespectful and emotionally abusive and then one fine day they just disappear without any trace and all ur messages are left unanswered . U start questioning ur worth,u start questioning urself on everything and ur deepest darkest fears pop up on ur mind.
U feel depressed and dejected how all ur energy invested into this person becomes futile . U come to realisation how u never truly mattered to them.How u were not even worth a reply to them . How those flowery words and actions were nothing but mere lies spoken to u and u feel dumb to have believed them. U feel reckless insecure and angry and disgusted within urself.
And that's when u learn how good their life is going . They seem happy lively and busy with their life ,posting on social media their large group of friends ,some even hopped into new relationships and how well they are doing in their life . This is what hurts ! The fact that they could get off on the hurting while leaving u like that and mistreating u ,this what aches the most. Most often than not ,we don't want these ghosters back. We subconsciously want them to experience the same pain ,the same agony and months of mental frustration they put us through while they are out there living their life .like a normal human being without any repercussions.
I want u all ghostee to realise one thing ,in this cruel world ,no one owes u anything. Not even ur parents ,family members /anyone . U came to this world alone and u will die alone so take full responsibility of ur life and stop being emotionally driven . Start becoming logically driven. No one owes u anything apology for putting u through pain ,depression . U have to understand that sometimes there will be no justice as is evident when poor people get exploited by rich and continue to maintain that wealth ,where is karma and God then? No where to be found. But that doesn't mean we stop believing in God . Have faith in ur morals and principles. What I mean to say is sometimes there will be no karma for those people who hurt u. No justice will be served . U have to become realistic and accept the reality for it.
U have to soak in the sadness and become mentally stronger and realise ghosters are not great human beings . I don't give a fuck if anyone comes to argue with me on their defence.Anyone who is capable of treating a person like that ,they are trash /assholes and don't deserve to stay in this world. No excuses of hurt people hurt people and all that nonsense . Enough is enough. If they are hurt ,they could have chosen a different pathway. Remember they consciously chose to hurt u because either way u never mattered to them .All trashy excuses against disgusting behaviour can go into garbage .
And to the ghostee- stop being emotional. Get up and improve ur life and become so emotionally and mentally stronger that when u don't give a flying fuck whether u receive an apology or not.yrs down the line. And if u do get one ,make sure to call a spade a spade and be so mentally strong to delete that message without even wasting a breath. And Never Ever Speak To Them Ever Again. U create ur closure by creating a life u can't wait to wake upto. U work on urself and become emotionally and mentally stronger enough . As always remember as John Green quoted "u don't get to choose whether u get hurt in this world but u do have some say in who hurts u " U gotta say in it and ur say is to ignore these individuals for the rest of ur life and never ever waste a breath of urs on them.
P.S - look at ur parents faces and remember when u will fall ill,they will accompany u to the doctor . Not the girl or the guy who ghosted u . Never forgive them . Never ! And if u have no one. Always remember u have urself. Treat urself with respect and work on urself . Everything else will fall into place . Thank you.

This is really random and I didn’t know what subreddit to even go to for this, but I was reminded of here and maybe someone can help me figure out which PC game this comes from. I apologize if this doesn’t belong here, but people are excellent here when it comes to vague memories.
I don’t remember much about the game because I couldn’t have been older than 3 or 4 at the time, but there was a Busy World of Richard Scarry game I played (poorly lol) over and over, and I have been struggling to identify which game my memory of this comes from.
My family and I have been quoting Lowly Worm for like 27 years (give or take) now as an inside joke because of this game. All I remember is I think I was making Huckle do something with a red house in the woods? Whatever I was doing though, I messed up every single time.
And every time I did, the game’s way of telling me to try again was Lowly saying in the goofiest voice ever that lives rent free in my entire family’s head because they heard it on repeat so much, is “sOmEtHinG iS wRoNg HeRe!”
It was necessary for me to type it like that because he had this weird way of saying it, and it’s been driving me insane because I can’t find anything online with him saying that in a game lol.
My older siblings and my parents alike will still say it the exact way as the worm did whenever something goes terribly wrong in our lives and none of us have heard the actual sound byte other than from each other in years.
All of the play throughs on YouTube for multiple Richard Scarry games seem to be focused on doing them correctly and missing out on the fun of also making mistakes, considering how creative they used to be in a lot of these games with either random reactions or some out of place tiny animation in a corner.
And while some of them on there look familiar, I’m still unable to pinpoint which one my specific memory comes from.
All I do know 100% is that it was for PC and I remember picking it off the shelf (after being lifted up) at I think Toys R Us back when the boxed cd games became more common and available.
If anyone is able to help me identify the exact game and help me torture my family with this sound now that I’m 30 years old and wantingg to make them all groan over it for the first time in decades, I would greatly appreciate it.

Ever since before my boyfriend had proposed to me, I’ve always told everyone that I don’t want a wedding. It just seemed like an expensive hassle when my only goal was to marry the love of my life. Since then my fiance has shared that it’s his dream to have a big wedding so I learned to love the idea and plan it with him. But less than one month into being engaged, his mom starts asking me about my bridal shower. It caught me off guard as I’m trying to plan a wedding for 280 people, why would I even think about a bridal shower? My mom is mentally and physically disabled and my maid of honor is out of state so I figured I would just skip the whole thing since I had no one to plan it. Then one day I meet my fiance at his mom’s house after he’s had a few beers and he goes “just ask her mom, she won’t care!” So she asks me if she can plan my bridal shower for me. She goes onto say how she knows that no one can do it for me and that I deserve one so she’d love to do it. I told her yes and i genuinely appreciated the offer.
Now this is where it gets weird. The first issue is the prizes. I tell her that there’s this great store nearby that sells gift baskets for cheap and she goes “oh that store stresses me out” so I tell her that it’s no big deal, I go there all the time anyway and I buy a bunch of prizes. She buys a single pickle ball set. I ask her if she wants me to drop the prizes off at her house and she tells me to just leave them at mine until she’s ready for them. And again, I tell her that fine.
Then she chooses the hall and caterer. She asks if I don’t mind, she really wants it close to her mom (my fiancés grandma). It’s a little bit further of a drive for my family, but I agree. It annoyed me a little bit that she thought my finances grandma came before mine for my shower though. Then she asks if her mom can cater because she’d really love it and again I say that’s totally ok if she wants to do it, it’s just going to be a lot of women to cook for
Next my fiance calls me and tells me that he has to run to the store because chicken is on sale and his mom asked him to buy it for the shower. He pays for it all and puts it in our deep freezer.
A little bit later, she’s trying to get in touch with my bridesmaids to make sure the date of the shower works out for everyone. Then they start talking about planning the shower and one of my bridesmaids suggests a cocktail for the shower. My MIL then informs her that the hall she booked doesn’t allow alcohol so it’s a DRY shower. She never talked to me about this at all so I started to get super irritated. At this point we have paid for everything except a single pickleball set and the low fee of renting the hall. Yet I’m sacrificing mimosas at my shower so she can look good for her mom.
She hasn’t come up to me with any ideas for this shower other than the games. If I try to send an idea to her, she just asks me to get a quote. I was even gifted a box of wedding decor and it had a tiered cupcake holder so I sent her a picture and said we can use this and she goes “oh you want cupcakes?” I tell her I love German chocolate and we need a dessert anyway but she can’t figure out how to plan this out so she goes “How many cupcakes does it hold? How many cupcakes do you think we’ll need?” And then sends me a picture of a cupcake that fits with the theme she chose and it isn’t even German chocolate. Again, I am in the middle of planning a wedding I did not want for almost 300 people. It really irked me that she asked to plan this thing but can’t even figure out how to bring cupcakes to a party without me doing it.
Now the shower is three months away and the only thing done is my FULL garage because she still hasn’t taken any of the decor or prizes and it’s already full with decor for my wedding. Gift baskets aren’t made, invites aren’t sent out, a menu hasn’t been discussed, and the only idea discussed on her end is the games and the theme.
I don’t want to be ungrateful and I’m sure other girls would love to plan their bridal shower. But all of this is stuff that I simply don’t want. Yet, we have paid and planned almost all of it. I am DREADING this shower. It feels like it’s more about my MIL being able to tell everyone she planned it instead of actually doing it and none of it is even what I like.
The wedding is killing me. I literally quit my job because it’s becoming so much (we had talked about me quitting after we were married and my fiance can support me financially until I find something else ) you better believe my MIL took me quitting and ran with it. Because last I heard, she was telling my fiance that “it’ll never work out” and implied that I’m a gold digger. And telling the whole family about me.
I’m such a mess about it all and I feel like I’m going crazy. There’s so much more, and I can answer any questions in the comments. Does anyone have any ideas or thoughts?

Thousands of users worldwide have been experiencing this uneven battery drain issue, which is due to version 1.4.2. of the firmware. It is NOT due to user misuse. See reddit thread here
In the US, users outside of warranty are given free replacements, but it seems like that is not the case outside of the US. I just find it ridiculous that we are paying close to $300 for what is supposed to be the best noise-cancelling earphones, and SONY is trying to milk people more through repairs. It is absolutely ridiculous. Needless to say, I will be avoiding this brand from now on, which is such a pity because the noise cancelling itself has been great.
Please comment if you have experienced the same issue and/or if you have reached out to SONY Support. I myself did and they quoted me $100 for the battery and replacement fee lol.

Morning x
Just finished breakfast. Getting ready for work now and might pop into a garage to get another quote. Feel mentally drained at the moment. Tired.
Didn’t end up snacking on anything last night, just went back to sleep. lol it would be very interesting to see stuff from 2010 even if camera quality wasn’t great.
I’m on same shift as yesterday so will get train in around half 10.
Will message you throughout but hope you have a good day too x

Hello! 😊👋🏼
If you're looking for your new best friend and your biggest cheerleader sprinkled with a little bit of Golden Retriever energy, you've come to the right post! 🐶
I’m somebody who loves to chat the day away, getting to know all there is to know about a person (I actually kinda do this for a job!) and forming lovely connections.
A little about me - I’m an introverted extrovert. I love my home comforts, but in the comfort of my own home and with people I love, I’m a bit of an oddball. I love to read, watch horror & comedy movies, listen to metal and country music, get way too invested in WWE, collect Funko Pops, bake, laugh at bad jokes and great memes, and send unsolicited videos of me lip syncing to my friends. I’m a fiancé and a mum to my cute pup and my three lovely cats (crazy cat lady who?). Happy to exploit them for my own personal gain by sharing pictures of them without their consent should you wish. Also, I have watched Always Sunny more times than I can count and will quote this at you regularly ☀️
I like to be upfront and let people know that I’m pierced and rather chonky because if that bothers you then we probably aren’t gonna make great friends ❤️
If you think we’d get along, or simply that you can lip sync better than me, then get in touch! Looking forward to meeting some lovely new people 🌻

Located in CA
I took my 9 yr old lab Ivy to the vet for an emergency visit in the beginning of March. Our regular vet couldn’t take her so we had to go to the 24/7 animal hospital. They are excellent and I was willing to pay for whatever they needed to do to help ivy.
She had been very obviously sick and in pain, puking, diarrhea, not wanting to eat. They did an ultrasound, blood panel, urinalysis, fluids, meds. They found elevated liver enzymes and ketones in her urine. She was so sick they wanted to hospitalize her overnight. I asked what they would be doing and they said monitoring. I asked if I could just monitor her myself at home and bring her back right away if she gets worse? They gave me a couple prescriptions and sent us home. -$1729
I didn’t realize until the next day they didn’t give us any pain meds or anything to help Ivy’s eating (I’d tried seriously all the bland diet options, she didn’t want any of it) I went back to get her pain meds and prescription food, and the girl says they forgot to charge me for something else so she added that on too. -$150
Ivy was getting better slowly but still not her normal happy self at all. Sad, droopy eyes, wanting to sit curled up in my lap like a baby 😭 I kept doing everything they said and I took her back about a month later to check her levels again. We saw the vet, then went back out to the busy lobby to wait until someone came out to tell me the results or medications or whatever. So I sat in the lobby and waited, I asked a few times for updates bc I needed to get back to work. After 3 hours I asked if they could check and see what was going on.
There was another dog named Ivy there that morning and the receptionist closed out MY Ivy’s account (and charged the other lady’s card -$566 of my charges). I was annoyed and paid my bill (non-itemized invoice bc she couldn’t find mine) and Ivy and I went straight to work. Ivy is my service dog and sleeps under my desk.
They said the liver enzymes and urine ketone levels were both back to a normal level which was great news. They still couldn’t really give me a clear answer as to what could’ve caused all of this, sometimes they eat things, or just get sick, whatever. She said a slow recovery was normal bc livepancreas stuff is unpredictable, painful, and can take a while to heal.
The hospital’s office called me the next day to apologize for making me wait so long and reimbursed $316 (the liver panel, I think, I don’t have an itemized invoice). They offered this without me asking which I really appreciated.
Ivy has still been sick, but definitely better than when I first took her in. She was still acting sad, no interest in her favorite things. I knew she was in pain and brought her to a different vet last week.
Dr.S had been Ivy’s vet most of her life at our regular vet’s office - we love him. He left and started his own practice,and I just found his new location is 15 minutes away from my house!! It was kind of secretive when he left the other place, I think out of respect for the owners and not take half the clients with him. Anyway, I was really happy to find him again, I fully trust him. He was Ivy’s vet at her 8-week old visit, did her spay, all of it. Ivy is scared of men she doesn’t know and she loves Dr. S.
He took a look in her mouth and was like Whoa! Found it! He saw one badly rotten and cracked tooth in the back and wanted to get scheduled for removal right away. I bought the senior wellness plan for -$998. I was quoted $1200-1600 for surgery. (He was also going to remove a large benign mass from her side since she’d be under anesthesia already, I’d been wanting to do this for a few years so this is something I wanted him to do also)
This Tuesday was surgery day. He ended up removing 3 teeth, a molar on each side, and a front tooth that was cracked and broken off (I knew about this, I’d been told it wasn’t anything to be concerned about).
He said one of the molars and the front tooth both had exposed roots, the back one had an abscess and the root was touching the bone. He asked if I wanted the pictures bc it was really interesting and you don’t usually see it so advanced 😞 He said this is definitely what has been hurting her and making it hard to eat. He said they must have not looked in Ivy's mouth at all if they didn’t notice it- twice??
He didn’t have enough time to remove the mass. He said he wasn’t comfortable keeping her under any longer due to her age and blood pressure levels. Unless it grows rapidly we’re leaving it for now.
-$350 for everything this day, including surgery time & anesthesia, full dental cleaning & sealant,office visit, sedated nail trim, medications, canned soft food, heart worm testing, some other stuff included with the senior wellness package.
It’s been two days since she got her teeth out and she’s already smiling again. She was jumping around and trying to play with her brother (cat) and she only does that when she’s really excited!! Ivy is the best dog I could ever ask for. Seeing her in pain has been so hard, because I couldn’t help her!! I was trying everything but it wasn’t working. I’m so glad we found it and I think she will be able to get better now. I wasn’t so sure for awhile there.
I called the hospital place and told them what I found out and asked what happened. How could they have missed this- TWICE? The girl was really nice and agreed this was a “very valid concern” and asked me to explain everything to her and she would talk to the medical director, try to get some answers for me, and get back to me. She asked what I wanted the resolution to be. I said I thought it would be appropriate to ask for all of my charges to be refunded in relation to this event over the past couple months including Dr. S’s charges.
She called me back when I was at dinner so I missed her call.
Is this right? I don’t know what I’m looking for, feedback, reassurance, guidance? This is malpractice, right??
I talked to Dr.S’s receptionist today, she’s going to send me the photos and a breakdown of charges between the wellness plan and what I had done, try to make sense of what would be appropriate to ask them to refund. I kinda also want to ask them for $200 flat to reimburse the food/groceries spent trying to get her to eat, literally anything I could try on her bland diet, I tried! I don’t have receipts but I know I spent a shit ton of money as Ivy’s short order cook the last couple months. (Today she scarfed down her regular food for the first time in forever, I cried). Is this pushing it too far? Should I just take whatever they offer me?
What about the fact Ivy spent 2 1/2 months in pain & suffering from the time I brought her in to the day Dr. S did her surgery? She has lost weight, and has been pretty obviously miserable the whole time.
Thanks for reading.

First/Previous
Gemma was right about the sky’s open night, and I could sympathize with her recollection of the beauty, but for me it must’ve been a greater tragedy—the young woman had only ever enjoyed the stars in the pits of Golgotha; I could, long before, drink in the sky at leisure. Cruel memories.
The night the Rednecks died was one of viscera, but before that it was coolness on the breeze, a warmth by the fires while John played his guitar and we had only just taken two dozen kegs of lager (personal reserves) from the Atlanta despot—the man that kept his subjects as slaves and not a person among the camp was left without budding intoxication. No matter the age, everyone was invited to be merry; if it was that children too faced the plight of a bad world, then so too should they reap the moments of plenty—or so the camp figured.
John had taken a group by the fires where wagons were drawn in interlocking semicircles for cover and Jackson sat beside the picker. Jackson was a man which normally preferred quiet reflection over boisterous singing and nearly never wore the band on his throat, and yet there he was belting out the chorus at the top of his lungs, tankard in hand, red cloth blazed around his neck—it was a contagion and those drunk enough for easier embarrassment sang proudly along:
“There is power, there is power in a band of working folk!
When we stand hand in hand,
That’s a power, that’s the power,
That must rule in every land!”
I’d taken to the outlying shadows with my back pressed against the gas-powered caleche, my own tankard in hand. I loved the warmth of that great big family, truly, but even in those days—and maybe it was that queer youthfulness which longed for individualism that made me that way then—I remained as distanced as possible when I could. I sipped the lager, it was a fine drink and my brother Billy, nearly as old as I was when I’d first taken up in the infantry, swaggered to stand beside me just as quiet for minutes and we looked at the stars and he asked me what it was like to kill a man.
“Is it hard?” he asked.
I nodded, “Sometimes.”
“Killing monsters ain’t so bad. Don’t know if I could do it to a person.”
“You could if they meant to kill you; or if they meant to do it to someone you cared about,” I promised him. In those days, spry, energized, I held no time for staring into abysses; though I still wasn’t a man fully, I pretended as one. It was about family, and it was about doing what was right—what’s right seemed to change, or I changed. The world felt stark with good and evil and even later I’d feel that sentiment well up in me, but if that’s true, I know I stand more on the latter and so I intentionally obfuscated it—this I know. If not, it might be too much to bear. I was required to lie to myself and even in knowing I lied, it was better.
Billy tugged on the red kerchief around his throat and asked me how it looked on him.
“Looks good,” I said.
“Don’t think I look stupid at all?”
I smiled over my drink, “You always look stupid.” I sipped. “The neckwear’s fine.”
“Give me a break,” said Billy; he investigated his own cup, gave it a swish with his wrist, watching its contents swirl. “Aren’t you ever afraid you’ll die?”
“Sometimes—nights like this—I wouldn’t mind it.”
“Really?” my brother asked.
“There’s always a chance of it. Every moment, I guess.”
He smiled. “I wish I had that confidence.”
“You’ll get it,” I returned his smile; it was true that he would gain the fighting spirit. It came to us all with time and reminiscing on the early days, I recall the grit and the hatred—there was learning there too though. Besides, I’d seen the squalors of a stationary man. The stagnation of a place, an unmoving home.
John put his guitar away and laughter erupted from the crowd from something said and Sibylle, cowboy hat cocked funny, traipsed across the camp to the open keg for a refill; the man there, tending the cylinders, was a man named Tandy (a foreigner and one unknown besides the way he smoked a skunk pipe and told wild stories). My mother leaned over while Tandy opened the spigot mouth on the keg, and she froze there, and I could see her there cut out forever against the light of the fires; I watched, and it came so suddenly that I couldn’t be sure what’d happened at all. It was so sudden that I couldn’t find my weapon and I couldn’t find even the courage to fight because in those moments it wasn’t courage I needed, it was grounds to understand.
Sibylle came apart in two pieces immediately, torn completely through and dust erupted as her legs struck the ground while her torso spun through the air like a top, a trail of liquid trailed after, caught in the blue of night so it shone as black; she couldn’t scream. Tandy was a statue. Before anyone could react, more flesh, other bodies, went up and there was all manner of limbs which filled the ground, and it is astounding how quickly a red mist forms across the ground during a massacre. Perhaps the wails of my comrades started before, perhaps others fell before Sibylle, but I could not comprehend the goings-on till I saw her drop the way she did.
Frail human screams rose on the night; I slammed to the ground, tankard gone away and hands scrambling in the dirt; I reached up blindly and yanked Billy to my level and his expression was one of innocence, panic, tears even. Glancing around, I saw the demons bolt from the pitch-black darkness on the edges of camp, mutants taking the fore while greater creatures lurked further back, some hurled whips of gliding metal which writhed over their heads when they stretched them out for a strike—alien—and they sliced directly through soft human bodies. Not even a cry escaped me, but Billy let go with it and I slapped my cupped hand over his mouth hard to hold the screams. His voice would not have been alone anyway, not alongside that startling cacophony. Amidst the cries of people, there were the cries of horses, of our hounds.
We rolled across the ground, slipped beneath the raised body of the gas-powered caleche, remained quiet in the dark, peeked out between the wheels.
“What’s happening?” Billy whispered through my fingers; I removed my hand from him and caught a glimpse of him framed in a square of firelight through the wheels—we lay there on our bellies and the left side of his face was glazed with dirt where I’d pulled him down.
“Shh,” I told him, “Shh, please. Please.” Not another word came while I pleaded with him, pleaded with the world to make this all a nightmare.
Through the haze and the running silhouettes painted black, I saw what might have been Jackson; he stumbled and in the moment that it took me to gasp, his head was gone from his body, his torso slid on as he collapsed, came to rest mere feet from the motor wagon. I told myself that it wasn’t him, but it probably was.
Some mutants lumbered through the camp like animated corpses, some leapt with wild energy or sprayed noxious fumes which lingered in the air; others still were amalgams of humanlike limbs themselves—fiends—exhausting terrible sounds, producing smells of sulfur, glistening with whatever liquids excreted from their oblong alien orifices. Demons ran amok, chanted in devil tongued languages, laughed madly at the destruction—others still, those which displayed some greater intelligence, broke into a song I could never hope or want to replicate; it seemed a unified damnation.
“Please,” I repeated in a whimper and Billy hushed me this time and I realized we were holding hands, squeezing for dear life as figures walked the camp, speared those half-alive, elected others for twisted carnality.
In darkness, in fright plainly, we scuttled from the recess of our hiding place, kept quiet, held to each other, and went into the wasteland where nothing was—every shadow was a potential threat, every second could’ve been the last. We were holding hands; then we weren’t.
Only a glance—that’s all I afforded my brother and nothing more—what a joke of a person I am! What a coward I was. Always.
Something got him in the dark and instead of dying alongside those I cared about, I went on, heartbeat driving me till it was all that I heard in my ears and my muscles ached and my chest heaved and sweat covered me, chilled me in the breeze of the night—it was only once I’d accepted the dark completely, crawled into a hollowed space of rocks along a squat ridge that I watched the demolished camp; it seemed no larger than a spark, but the creatures, fiends and others continued their war cries; never before had I witnessed demons participate in such an attack.
I watched till the sun came, till the fires became smoke, then I watched the band of hell creatures disband. The smell of sulfur remained in the air—copper too—and I stumbled back to the camp in a dreamlike daze, totally unbelieving of the things I saw. Among those dead on the ground, I could recognize none; among those piked from rear to shoulder, standing like morbid scarecrows where they’d been steadied against the ground, I could not want to recognize.
Many of the wagons were overturned, including the gas-powered caleche and I went to it; the metal of its body was warped but I fell to the ground by it and pushed my back against the exposed undercarriage, remained frozen there while examining the bodies, the terrible strips of skin which rested places like wet sheets of paper, the piles of bones removed and smashed and piled.
I cried so deeply that oxygen became a memory, and the shakes couldn’t be contained.
It was like that for so long, knees pulled up, face pushed between, and the wails came unafraid of whatever attention they might garner; there was no rationale, but I imagine if there had been, I would’ve welcomed death in that misery. It was a deep wound that not even my own cowardice would overcome for the sake of survival.
Unaware of my surroundings, not wanting to look up from the ground between my legs, the noise which had started out as imaginary became real and I raised my head then to listen better and wipe my sore eyes; it was the sound of clip-clop horse hooves and I mildly wondered if any of the animals had been spared. I stood and pivoted around the dead camp and there it was, a man on a painted horse with golden hair; he leisurely drove the mount through the place, maneuvering around pools of blood, clumps of body parts and upon seeing me, he smiled and offered a languid wave, keeping one of his gloved hands on the reins.
The man wore white and swished his hair back upon arriving directly in front of me. Ahoy, he offered kindly, Did you happen to see the other riders?
I shook my head, feeling numb.
Ah, he said, I could have sworn four other riders, at least, passed me on my way. His gray eyes examined the carnage. Shame. He shook his head. You are?
“H-harlan.”
He nodded and nearly offered an expression of genuine condolence before descending from the horse; the animal gave a gentle grunt and wandered away from its master to inspect a nearby group of the dead. The man offered his hand, and I took it in a shake. Mephisto, said the man. He flashed a smile again before his face grew serious. I’ve come to you to deal.
I shot him a questioning look, one of bafflement.
I heard your calls from far off. He nodded, removed a white handkerchief from his breast pocket and swiped it down his face. Hot out. He shrugged then replaced the cloth in his pocket. This, he motioned to the disarray of vehicles, of bodies, I can’t fix all this—it’s too much—but there’s a person you love, I know. I could bring them back.
“Doctor?” In retrospect it was such a naïve question.
He shook his head.
“Angel?”
He grinned and nodded, Sure.
“Demon?”
Undoubtedly. His eyes—pits of gray in that radiant face—nearly expressed solemness; he daintily shook the hair from his face and looked at his steed which sniffed a corpse. What’s the word, Harlan? There are others calling and I must be on my way soon—I can’t dally. There was a sharpness to the words. Can’t dally. We must convene soon, or I’ll mosey on.
I snorted back the clog in my nose from the tears and wiped my eyes with my sleeves. “Okay.”
Deal?
I nodded, “Deal.”
Sleep tonight, said Mephisto, Sleep and you’ll be rewarded in the morning.
“You said it’s a deal.”
He nodded and scanned the carnage before we matched gazes and then he said, Yes?
“What is it you want from me?”
Nothing you need now. He called the horse, and it came, and he swept his feet quickly from the ground and settled into position atop the animal. Sleep, Harlan. You won’t be bothered. There are worse things still over the horizon.
I watched him go till he disappeared and once he was gone, I couldn’t cry anymore and instead rummaged through the wagons for what I might carry; along the way I found John, face twisted but corpse intact. The body from the previous night that I’d guessed was Jackson couldn’t be determined but I found him nowhere else. I slid Sibylle’s holster from her hips, fell hard onto the ground and found that I could sob more. I took her cowboy hat, placed it on my head and held her pistol in one hand and the belt holster dangled from the other while I searched the other bodies; there were so many, but I could not find Billy.
Waiting for darkness, I took the spot where I rested, back against the caleche’s undercarriage, watched the sky and felt the gun in my hand; it was heavy. I put it to my head, closed my eyes, and whispered affirmations to myself then I put the pistol between my splayed legs, watched it still in the dirt, and pulled the hat down over my eyes but it did little for the smell. Though the brim of the hat cut the sky out, I watched the ground and saw circling shadows form overhead and heard calls of turkey vultures; they came to pick over the bodies. I withdrew my knees to my chest there again and laid my forearm across them and bit into my arm while closing my eyes. I had thought I was a man and for a time, maybe I was, but there in that miserable pit of despair I became a child again and if I’d become more delirious, I’m sure I might’ve called out for Jackson like it was a bad dream.
Into a fading stupor of sleep in the sun I went and when I awoke again it was dark and chilly and I was tired and hungry but too sick to eat and hardly strong enough to move; I looked at the gun and put it into its holster and left it there by the caleche. In the light of the moon and stars, I moved to gather a bolt of canvas; I unfurled the fabric and created a leaning shelter against the overturned vehicle and crawled into it. There was a hole in the canvas, and I peeked out at the stars.
Weeping came again, but not so uproarious; I was stuck there letting go of whimpers, lying on my back, feeling the tears trace in lines from the outer corners of my eyes to collect along my earlobes. In time, I fell to sleep again on the hard ground because the mourning had taken all else from me.
A pinpoint of sunlight broke my eyelids and I jerked awake and reached for the holster, but it was gone. So was the hat. I crawled from the leaning shelter and there he was.
Billy stood plainly among the dried, congealed blood-soaked field and he looked on to the horizon and all shadows were long in the midday sun which hung up there in a soft blue sky. Whether it be a dream or a spell, I couldn’t care—I charged to him and spun him so he faced me and though his face was plain and expressionless, I wrapped him into a forceful hug. He placed his hands on my back and gave a gentle squeeze; when I pulled from him, my hands on his shoulders, I saw he held Sibylle’s hat in his left hand, pinched by the brim; he’d already tugged her holster belt around his hips—he could have it all. I shook while holding him then let go to wipe my face.
“You’re alive,” I nodded.
He nodded without speaking then looked at the hat in his hand and placed it on his head and firmly pressed it down.
“Billy! Hell, you’re alive!”
The corners of his mouth twitched upward for a moment then he nodded again. “Yeah.” His eyes curiously searched our surroundings like he meant to take each detail in forever.
I slapped him on the shoulder and almost squealed. “Goddammit.” I wiped my eyes again and could do little to keep the excitement from exploding from me. “Oh, we should go. We should go on and get somewhere safe.”
He nodded toward the horizon, “’Lanta?”
“Sure.”
We packed and it was a like an ethereal phantom remained among us beside the quiet dead; turkey vultures cawed to break the silence, pecked where they pleased on the bodies, and I couldn’t want to fight them. I kept sidelong eyes on Billy with the ever-present worry that he’d vanish. Perhaps he was the phantom.
From the rear of the caleche, I removed a few sentimental books Jackson liked, essential cookware, and sparse rations for the trek. The last thing I grabbed was my shotgun and a bit of ammo.
As we set from the dead place, the terrible silhouettes that were cut from there on the horizon behind us grew in my mind with every backward glance—I wanted to fall to pieces, but I saw Billy walk alongside me and although contented is not the right word, it is the nearest. The steps of our boots were all that was heard because I could not fathom to pierce the space between us with words for fear that it would all end. It was a dream, surely. I’d lost my mind. With my hands thumbed into the straps of my pack, I saw I my hands still shook, and they would shake a lot longer—years and with memories too. The crunch of earth underfoot became a rhythm and instead of looking at my brother, I watched his shadow on the ground.
“Everyone’s dead?” He asked.
“Yeah.”
“You’re sure?”
“Yeah,” I repeated.
“How ain’t I? How ain’t you?”
To say that it was luck would’ve been too morbid. Instead of saying anything, I shrugged, kicked a loose stone, watched my feet some more, and felt a queasiness come over me. For the moment, the immeasurable deaths of those I’d left behind were forgotten in the company of my brother and a sickness welled up inside of me so suddenly that I felt that I’d fall to pieces at the slightest provocation. Finally, I did speak again, but only after steeling myself to the troubles, “Yeah, how are you alive?”
Billy shrugged at me then stumbled up a hill which overlooked trash wood wilderness where sticks lay twisted and bare and further on the sight of Atlanta was visible and I cupped a hand across my brow and Billy did the same and we looked on at the shadows of the place out there where strings of smoke rose from the skyline as a signature for the desolation of the city; it was dead. I felt it in my bones.
My hands were light while my head was heavy, my throat was dry, and the entire world seized in moments of stillness or perhaps it was my own vision which construed the world in that way; I took to the small hill which Billy had climbed and sat there and stared at the place between my feet to steady myself.
“Fire,” said Billy.
I nodded and nearly choked.
Leviathan—till then I had no belief in dragons—glided over the broken city, its winged shadow little seen but its voice was deep across the scene, letting go of roars which shook the ground. We hid among the trash wood and moved down the hill and watched the creature thrash in the air as if it was angry for its abominable life. Whatever millennia it spent in the pits of hell seemingly thrust upon it a love of destruction and pain.
My brother moved with a more assured stride and kept a cool distance and upon fleeing from the wreckage, from the outlying area of Atlanta and the place we’d left our family, he spoke little and watched me strangely whenever I took to melancholic fatiguing. We lit no fires for fear of what it could draw from the night so in the dark I’d see him watching some far-off place, maybe seeing through the reality which surrounded us, and he’d snap from it, catch my eye, and disappear for minutes to scan the perimeter of whatever place we stayed. Being alongside my resurrected brother was lonelier than I could bear, and I hoped he’d disappear for good or that I could work up the courage to end my own life. It was like purgatory explained in books and for a time, it felt endless; upon witnessing the destruction of Atlanta, we pushed to Marrietta, and it was much the same. As was Chatanooga, Nashville, Knoxville, Louisville, Charlotte. The ocean had risen so that Fayetville was gone underwater, and the Florida leg disappeared completely as far as I’m aware. I understood later that Memphis was overlooked and more places further west were alive too, but when we’d exhausted the south, we moved north and found strongholds of families or traders or even small groupings of civilization, but by and large we found nothing much in the two years that we hoofed it from place to place; it was my doing mostly—I wanted to find a place untouched by the mayhem in the area my family had once patrolled.
In retrospect, I am certain that Billy only stayed by my side for convenience; there wasn’t any of my brother left in the man that was my travelling companion for that time. He was a ghost of a person and Mephisto had preyed upon my desire in the worst moment of weakness in my life. There were nights—maybe we’d taken up in a natural alcove for shelter or we’d locked ourselves in some ancient structure for sleep—I’d watch Billy lay where he was, Sibylle’s hat and holster lying beside him, and I’d think of putting him down but he’d stir and in a brief shadow I’d see my brother as he’d been and withdraw to bury my face in fake sleep to be met with images of the night the demons attacked where I’d shake, sweat, and bite my lips so hard I’d drink blood.
Two years we marched around the Appalachians and in that time, I felt myself wither and disconnect.
Upon moving further north we met Indianapolis—that’s what it was called back then—and it was run by an older woman called Lady Lazarus; I reckon her father, affluent and dead, was a fan of Plath. Indianapolis was fortified more than most with its high walls, and its wall men, and its underground facilities which produced substantial ammunition. We—me and Billy’s revenant—were travelling with a group of traders we’d taken up with from out west; they called themselves wizards and although they seemed of the occult, their spirits discounted whatever suspicions I might’ve had of them.
I remember first pushing through that big gate; the town kept with it an indisputable malaise and though we were greeted at the gate by the leader Lady Lazarus—her brothers came along with her—and her jovial demeanor carried a certain infectious quality, I could not help but notice that the regular denizens maintained a healthy distance from their leader (the guards which followed the Lady everywhere probably had something to do with this).
Lady Lazarus touched each of our hands in greeting with enthusiasm and I could not help but notice how soft they were, how vibrant her eyes were, how much she smiled, and how beautiful she was given her age; already her head was fully gray.
Upon meeting each of us, going through the wizard traders first, she came to me, and Billy and she shook my hand then pivoted to Billy.
“Welcome. You can call me Lady.”
Billy caught her hand in his, held it longer than she’d intended so that they held eye contact, and he smiled broadly, tipped the cowboy hat on his head back to expose his smooth forehead and said, “And you can call me Maron, mam. You are quite a sight for a tired man.”
Though Maron—as he’d named himself—was more boy than man, Lady took a disturbed liking to him immediately and we prolonged our stay in Indianapolis after the wizards departed to head west.
Under the rule of Lady, Indianapolis was a theocracy, with her addressing the huddled masses at the steps of her grand abode, she’d preach for hours on sin and strife and quote her favorite passages; though reminiscent of my time with the Rednecks, I never found any truth or sincerity or freedom in her teaching—hers was more trouble, brimstone, fire and I’d had enough of that for a lifetime. Public execution was common. As was torture.
Maron distanced himself further from me, but I remained to keep an eye on him—it was not sentimentality but rather I existed without purpose and conjured some from watching my brother.
Often, Lady invited Maron to her private rooms and though the rumors and speculation ran the full spectrum of perverse speculation, every denizen feigned ignorance at her pregnancy.
Upon giving birth, the infant was malformed with two heads—her brothers took this as an omen and killed the child, put their leader in the stocks for months, and stripped her of dignity while the denizens did to her what they pleased.
Maron rose through the wall men while Lady’s brothers assumed control of Indianapolis and called themselves Bosses; in the time since Lady’s reign, the place was renamed to Golgotha for its closeness to a messiah.
I went west but always found myself drawn back to Golgotha because of some emptiness in me. It was only with Suzanne that I wanted something more and knowing them, I almost believed in a world like the one that children dream about. The world that Gemma and Andrew chased after when they left home, like the one Aggie talked about in her mother’s books. There’s a hopelessness in me that I’ll never be rid of. In the interim between our initial arrival to Golgotha and that flight from that terrible city, I cannot know how many people I sacrificed in convening with demons because I refuse to know because the number would destroy me. That is the worst of it; I do not even have courage enough to face myself or the actions of my past in any substantive way.
Mephisto tainted me so that I could speak with his kind as a dealmaker and the disease grew.
Billy or Maron or whatever he is should have been reaped long ago or better, I should never have brought that abomination alive. Such a cruel world where a deep longing like that can be inverted, weaponized. Me and him should both die; me and him should have died a long time ago.
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To quote GSMArenas testing :

For the screen-on tests:
Brightness is set to 200nits with the screen showing all white.
Location services are turned on.
Airplane mode is activated, and Bluetooth is Off.
Wi-Fi is activated and connected to a network.
Volume is set to 15% to avoid variances in speaker setup to influence the result.

Source
So what if the Xperia is more efficient at 200nits when it's far more inefficient at 600nits? So what if the speakers on the xperia at 15% are efficient but inefficient at 70%? gaming at 60hz rather than 120hz? Streaming from youtube which can be greatly affected based on codec used on android version etc.
It makes no sense.
Here a nice example:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_LxWxxy2bSc
According to GSMArena the ranking should be:
Zenfone 11 ultra
Iphone 15 pro max
vivo 100pro
Galaxy S24 ultra
Oppo Find X7 ultra
xiaomi 14 ultra
honor M6 pro
Oneplus 12
Pixel 8 pro
However what we see in a more practical test:
Vivo 100 pro
Honor M6 Pro
S24 Ultra
Oneplus 12
Iphone 15 pro max
Xiaomi 14 Ultra
Zenfone 11 Ultra
Find X7 UItra
Pixel 8 pro
Note how according to GSMarena the Zenfone wins by a substantional margin, however on a real life test, it did pretty badly and even got beaten quite badly by the oneplus, which did horribly on gsmarenas test.
I know some people want to see some positives, but using GSMArenas battery test as an indication for battery life is just grasping for straws here. So please for the love is god, stop quoting the battery life test from GSMarena all the time for a positive for the display.

Need a little advice and guidance here if anybody can help. I recently found a great deal for a bed cap/camper shell for my 95’ For ranger extended cab. The guy was getting rid of it for $50 so I couldn’t pass up the opportunity, however the very back window above the tail gate is missing with the shattered pieces still remaining around the seal.
I have the 6’1” long bed, A.R.E. Camper shell with tinted windows. From my little bit of research, I’ve seen people have great long last results with a high quality acrylic that’s UV and scratch proof and think that’s the route I want to take.
The plexiglass/acrylic needs to be atleast 54” long by 18” wide to fit before I cut, and ideally .21” thick minimum and tinted. For the life of me I can’t find a place to buy this piece of material. I contacted a distributor of the shell and was quoted $500 for the factory glass and install which is a bit steep considering I have all the tools to cut and DIY this thing myself. Anybody ever do a project like this or have any recommendations for what type of material and where it can be purchased?
It’s an old 95” ranger I only paid a couple thousand for, I just use to go to and from work and for carrying dogs and kayaks. I just need something functional, and it doesn’t make too much sense to me to put more than a couple hundred bucks into this. Thank you in advance

Hello! 😊👋🏼
If you're looking for your new best friend and your biggest cheerleader sprinkled with a little bit of Golden Retriever energy, you've come to the right post! 🐶
I’m somebody who loves to chat the day away, getting to know all there is to know about a person (I actually kinda do this for a job!) and forming lovely connections.
A little about me - I’m an introverted extrovert. I love my home comforts, but in the comfort of my own home and with people I love, I’m a bit of an oddball. I love to read, watch horror & comedy movies, listen to metal and country music, get way too invested in WWE, collect Funko Pops, bake, laugh at bad jokes and great memes, and send unsolicited videos of me lip syncing to my friends. I’m a fiancé and a mum to my cute pup and my three lovely cats (crazy cat lady who?). Happy to exploit them for my own personal gain by sharing pictures of them without their consent should you wish. Also, I have watched Always Sunny more times than I can count and will quote this at you regularly ☀️
I like to be upfront and let people know that I’m pierced and rather chonky (here I am) because if that bothers you then we probably aren’t gonna make great friends ❤️
If you think we’d get along, or simply that you can lip sync better than me, then get in touch! Looking forward to meeting some lovely new people 🌻

Hello! 😊👋🏼
If you're looking for your new best friend and your biggest cheerleader sprinkled with a little bit of Golden Retriever energy, you've come to the right post! 🐶
I’m somebody who loves to chat the day away, getting to know all there is to know about a person (I actually kinda do this for a job!) and forming lovely connections.
A little about me - I’m an introverted extrovert. I love my home comforts, but in the comfort of my own home and with people I love, I’m a bit of an oddball. I love to read, watch horror & comedy movies, listen to metal and country music, get way too invested in WWE, collect Funko Pops, bake, laugh at bad jokes and great memes, and send unsolicited videos of me lip syncing to my friends. I’m a fiancé and a mum to my cute pup and my three lovely cats (crazy cat lady who?). Happy to exploit them for my own personal gain by sharing pictures of them without their consent should you wish. Also, I have watched Always Sunny more times than I can count and will quote this at you regularly ☀️
I like to be upfront and let people know that I’m pierced and rather chonky (here I am) because if that bothers you then we probably aren’t gonna make great friends ❤️
If you think we’d get along, or simply that you can lip sync better than me, then get in touch! Looking forward to meeting some lovely new people 🌻

My 5 month old baby recently started waking up screaming every time he's set down in his crib. He went through the 4 month regression already, it was 6 weeks of hell. We had 2 great days of sleep this week, both naps and night time, and now he's back to the worst of it. Waking every 30 mins to hour, screaming nonstop, fighting naps and bedtime. He only wants to sleep on boob, and I don't have a safe space or mattress for co sleeping.
He normally sleeps 5-7 hours during one period overnight, and 2-3 another. Normal naps used to average about an hour or so, 3 a day. I'm losing it, he's been so cranky for the last 3 days. We've tried gas relief via windi and bicycle legs, we've tried baby tylenol for teething. He sleeps in a merlin sleep suit, naps in a sleep sack generally. I've been trying to transition him away from the merlin.
It's 2am, he's slept for a total of maybe two hours tonight since 9pm. We're getting delirious.
Edited for more details: he's combofed due to me having an undersupply. I'm a sahm, my husband works. I have a stupid pumping schedule to try to improve my milk supply. He only just started nursing properly a month ago. My husband ends up staying up until 10-11pm trying to get the baby asleep enough to transfer to his crib most nights. (He didn't tonight. I don't know why he changed the way he's been doing things.) We usually take shifts for calming the baby. Him 9-12am, me 1-6am. Baby generally sleeps better later in the night, but tonight has been completely upended. He's only calmed for me tonight, and I can't handle him screaming.

January 4, 2024
HAPPY NEW YEAR 🎊🕛🥳 I'd like to see how you all are feeling about the content that gets posted here. I sometimes post on my profile,🔥 usually longer articles from scholarly pursuits.
♈♉♊♋♌♍♎♏♐♑♒♓⛎ I have a newer subreddit based on my Tarot content, at tarotjourneys for the most recent content that I have been working on in that subject area. I'm not sure if I will have new subreddits for different subjects, or if I can keep it together here. I am going to be posting and cross posting so join both or don't, just read and connect with me here, or there!
Also next week will be the first contest in the annual anthology📒 that will be good for you guys to start getting involved in this community. Post will go up on the 8th and stay up one week. There is going to be a three week option for submitting and then we will be selecting the first winner 🏆 on February 7th. Announced on February 9th. Next month contest will be February 8th. And so on.🏆🪶🥠🥡
🌹🌹🌹Prizes for the short story and poetry is $100 cash and promotions, as well as a place in the annual anthology! Our artwork is going to be a prize of $50 and featured in materials and online, then it will be a 🌹🌹🌹Anthology chapter👀 introduction, and compete for the cover, with the monthly winners. The same dates apply to the three different contests.👀🌹
Anyone can enter, up to three submissions in each category! First entry in each category is free. Each additional entry is just $10 via PayPal or Cash App. If you don't have the ability to pay, we have a few waiver.
Our sponsors will be featured in the first post so even if you don't want to enter, read about us then!!!🕛❤️‍🔥
🔥This will be a great way to get published! I can't wait to see you guys enter!🔥
This is January 4, 2024 newsletter #2.
This is our featured subject for January. We are going to focus on getting ready for working towards sobriety, if you struggling with bad habits or are addicted to something that's causing you more harm than good - check out the resources, articles and readings that are designed to accomplish the initial assessment of getting clean 🫧🪥. No judgement, no mandatory participation, just some things that are designed to make it easier to start that process.
January 4, 2024
🏠🏡 JANUARY = CLEAN UP YOUR HOUSE MONTH You are the house!🏠🏡

Quotes from Individuals in Recovery:

1. Russell Brand:
   
   • "The mentality and behavior of drug addicts and alcoholics are wholly irrational until you understand that they are completely powerless over their addiction and unless they have structured help, they have no hope."
2. Robert Downey Jr.:
   
   • "Job one is get out of that cave. A lot of people do get out but don't change. So the thing is to get out and recognize the significance of that aggressive denial of your fate, come through the crucible forged into a stronger metal."
3. Eminem (Marshall Mathers):
   
   • "I knew that my first thought was always negative. But now I have learned to just brush it off."
4. Demi Lovato:
   
   • "I had to learn the hard way that I can’t do parties anymore. Some people can go out and not be triggered, but that’s not the case for me."

Cited Readings on Addiction and Recovery:

1. "In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction" by Gabor Maté:
   
   • This book provides a compassionate and holistic understanding of addiction, exploring its biological, psychological, and societal roots.
2. "Beautiful Boy: A Father's Journey Through His Son's Addiction" by David Sheff:
   
   • A memoir that chronicles a father's struggle to understand and support his son through addiction and recovery.
3. "Recovery: Freedom from Our Addictions" by Russell Brand:
   
   • Russell Brand shares his personal journey through addiction and recovery, offering insights into the 12-step program and mindfulness practices.
4. "The Big Book" (Alcoholics Anonymous):
   
   • The foundational text of Alcoholics Anonymous, providing guidance, stories of recovery, and the principles of the 12-step program.
5. "Clean: Overcoming Addiction and Ending America's Greatest Tragedy" by David Sheff:
   
   • David Sheff explores the science of addiction and potential solutions, examining both personal and societal perspective.
6. Anthony Hopkins:
   
   • "I believe that we all have a basic need to feel safe. And when we don’t feel safe, we feel threatened, and when we feel threatened, we tend to react in various ways."
7. Nicole Richie:
   
   • "I have to be careful. I have to live in balance. I can’t stay up all night but then need to be on time in the morning. But I’m finding my way."
8. Elton John:
   
   • "I am a survivor. I’ve survived a lot of things. Life is full of pitfalls, even for someone like me."
9. Jamie Lee Curtis:
   
   • "I was the wildly controlled drug addict and alcoholic. I never did it when I worked. I never took drugs before 5 p.m. I never, ever took painkillers until 5 p.m."
10. "Unbroken Brain: A Revolutionary New Way of Understanding Addiction" by Maia Szalavitz:
    
    • This book challenges traditional views on addiction, exploring the role of learning and choice in the development and treatment of addiction.
11. "Memoirs Aren't Fairytales: A Story of Addiction" by Marni Mann:
    
    • A personal memoir that offers a raw and honest account of addiction, detailing the author's journey from addiction to recovery.
12. "Dopesick: Dealers, Doctors, and the Drug Company that Addicted America" by Beth Macy:
    
    • This investigative work explores the opioid crisis in America, shedding light on the complex factors contributing to addiction.
13. "Clean: The Journal" by Chris Niosi:
    
    • This interactive journal provides prompts, exercises, and reflections for individuals in recovery, helping them navigate their journey.
14. "Ninety Days: A Memoir of Recovery" by Bill Clegg:
    
    • Bill Clegg shares his personal experiences of recovery in this memoir, offering insights into the challenges and triumphs of rebuilding one's life.

Remember that these quotes and readings reflect the experiences and perspectives of individuals in recovery, and different people find inspiration and support in various sources. Always consider seeking professional guidance and support in addition to personal insights gained from shared experiences.

More Quotes from Individuals in Recovery:

1. Matthew Perry:
   
   • "I've had a lot of ups and downs in my life. I've learned a lot from my failures, but the best thing about failure is you get to learn from it."
2. Drew Barrymore:
   
   • "Recovery is an acceptance that your life is in shambles and you have to change it."
3. Rob Lowe:
   
   • "I'm nearly nine years sober, and there's a great quote I read about three years ago that had a huge impact on me. It's from the great Winston Churchill, who said, 'Success is never final, and failure is never fatal.'"
4. Kristen Johnston:
   
   • "I’ve been sober for over 14 years now, and the way I live my life is, I don’t think of it like I stopped drinking; I think of it like I started living."
5. "High Achiever: The Incredible True Story of One Addict's Double Life" by Tiffany Jenkins:
   
   • A memoir that provides a gripping account of addiction and recovery, exploring the author's journey to rebuild her life.
6. "Recover to Live: Kick Any Habit, Manage Any Addiction" by Christopher Kennedy Lawford:
   
   • This book offers a comprehensive guide to various forms of addiction and provides practical strategies for recovery.
7. "The Sober Diaries: How one woman stopped drinking and started living" by Clare Pooley:
   
   • A personal and humorous account of one woman's journey to sobriety, sharing insights and reflections on life without alcohol.
8. "Guts" by Kristen Johnston:
   
   • Kristen Johnston's memoir delves into her experiences with addiction and recovery, providing a candid and humorous perspective.
9. "This Naked Mind: Control Alcohol, Find Freedom, Discover Happiness, and Change Your Life" by Annie Grace:
   
   • Annie Grace explores the psychology of alcohol consumption and provides insights to help individuals change their relationship with alcohol.

These quotes and readings offer diverse perspectives on addiction and recovery, and they can serve as sources of inspiration, reflection, and guidance for those navigating their own journeys. Always seek professional support if needed and consider these resources as complementary to a comprehensive recovery plan.

More Quotes from Individuals in Recovery:

1. Craig Ferguson:
   
   • "I had a simple perception of success as getting things that I thought I needed to be happy. I thought that happiness was success. I don’t think that anymore."
2. Anthony Kiedis (Red Hot Chili Peppers):
   
   • "I've made a lot of mistakes and I don't regret any of them. Sometimes those things take you to the most amazing places."
3. Jamie Lee Curtis:
   
   • "I know my limits. I know that if I drink again, I will die. Every morning I wake up, I make that choice."
4. Steven Tyler (Aerosmith):
   
   • "It’s not about how much you drink. It’s about why you drink. It’s when life gets good, do you celebrate? Or when life gets tough, do you drink?"
5. "In My Skin: A Memoir of Addiction" by Kate Holden:
   
   • A memoir that explores the author's experience with addiction and her journey toward recovery.
6. "Recovery: A Guide for Adult Children of Alcoholics" by Herbert L. Gravitz and Julie D. Bowden:
   
   • This book addresses the specific challenges faced by adult children of alcoholics and provides guidance on healing and recovery.
7. "The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober" by Catherine Gray:
   
   • A personal and practical guide to quitting alcohol, sharing the author's journey to sobriety and the positive changes it brought to her life.
8. "The Recovering: Intoxication and Its Aftermath" by Leslie Jamison:
   
   • Combining memoir and research, this book explores the cultural and personal aspects of addiction and recovery.
9. "Girl Walks Out of a Bar: A Memoir" by Lisa F. Smith:
   
   • Lisa Smith's memoir chronicles her journey from high-functioning addiction to recovery, shedding light on the challenges and triumphs of sobriety.

Newsletter Repeat 🔁 TL:DR These quotes and readings provide diverse perspectives on addiction and recovery, and they offer valuable insights for individuals seeking inspiration and understanding. Always consider these resources in the context of individual needs and consult with professionals for personalized support.
I'd like to see how you all are feeling about the content that gets posted here. I sometimes post on my profile,🔥 usually longer articles from scholarly pursuits. I have a newer subreddit based on my Tarot content, at tarotjourneys for the most recent content that I have been working on in that subject area. I'm not sure if I will have new subreddits for different subjects, or if I can keep it together here. I am going to be posting and cross posting so join both or don't, just read and connect with me here, or there!
Also next week will be the first contest in the annual anthology that will be good for you guys to start getting involved in this community. Post will go up on the 8th and stay up one week. There is going to be a three week option for submitting and then we will be selecting the first winner 🏆 on February 7th. Announced on February 9th. Next month contest will be February 8th. And so on.
Prizes for the short story and poetry is $100 cash and promotions, as well as a place in the annual anthology! Our artwork is going to be a prize of $50 and featured in materials and online, then it will be a Anthology chapter introduction, and compete for the cover, with the monthly winners. The same dates apply to the three different contests.
Anyone can enter, up to three submissions in each category! First entry in each category is free. Each additional entry is just $10 via PayPal or Cash App. If you don't have the ability to pay, we have a few waiver.
Our sponsors will be featured in the first post so even if you don't want to enter, read about us then!!!
This will be a great way to get published! I can't wait to see you guys enter!
This is January 4, 2024 newsletter #2.

Hi I'm Ahri.
We've known AST was going to get a rework in 7.0 for 2 years, right? Wrong. We've known it since it was first revealed back in June 2013.
Okay lighthearted joke about how the job gets reworked every expansion out of the way, this is the first time the changes have seemed..enigmatic. Since 4.0's adjustments I have had a good bead on the direction the devs were going with AST, what philosophy they are employing, and what the intentions are. It has been a fun job overall to me for the last 7 years! Frequently controversial, but usually understandable, the job design has been pretty consistent at core levels every couple years. While the micro mechanics of the job constantly change - which, understandably, leaves some people miffed and displeased - the core essence of the job has been stable, and that is what has kept it fun and engaging to a majority of its raiding population:
The upcoming changes, honestly, do not make a lot of sense right now.
EDIT: And to be clear at this point to those that only make it this far but don't read the rest, I am not particularly doomed or upset unlike some of my peers. I'm mostly just confused. I think this rework could end up being pretty good when all's said and done. It could also end up being pretty bad. Both opinions can exist.
AST is a job which has always forced one to receive unknown variables, and had to react to the situation to make the most out of them as possible. However there is another aspect to the job: investing resources early, to get higher value out of them later. It is a very satisfying job to execute when your decisions are efficient, and intelligent. I feel this latter idea is where they are trying to shift cards - which currently represent the former - towards. Unfortunately, there is a chance that this may fall flat in execution and reduce AST away from the type of job people enjoy for those who currently play it, versus the type of job people who do not play AST want it to be. It is okay to try and appease the latter to bring more people into a way to play the game, and very understandable why someone who feels a job is inaccessible would want things to change so they can. However, we do not live in a zero sum game of healing options here. I warn against the dangers of alienating people in lieu of trying to overstuff accessibility.
Perhaps a rare opinion from my side here, I am not actually all too upset about the removal of RNG. I do not feel that randomness is somehow intrinsically necessary to the job. It makes it fun, yes, since they have done a good job using randomness to offer skill expression without having a significant impact on your own performance. You can high roll and low roll, of course, but negative outcomes are extraordinarily rare and we got to the point in EW where even a low rolling AST still performs at a very good level. It adds some exhilaration and interest to the job--how no 2 pulls will be necessarily alike.
However, I have great concerns about the manner in which they have decided to take this 0 RNG trial route. Making our 4-pack Sleeve Draw possibly* give us 1 DPS card per usage, has some grievous consequences on gameplay. It means there will be a frequent occasion our rotation ends up consistently trashing half our cards, which will end up feeling extraordinarily awful knowing that half our deck is going to do nothing. On the flipside, during prog season those mitigative and curative cards are going to feel oppressively strong. Some people have grievances about feeling forced to play AST despite them not liking its current state because of its performance capabilities in the best hands (which is not actually a problem nor the current state of healer balance, but that's another topic); this has potential to be exacerbated even further when AST can have this much defensive utility in one button. It could be fun and interesting depending on execution, but there's a very real chance it will feel rather boring and uninspired. The chance we will not really be..reacting, to a situation, per se, but moreso we will know every rotation we will utilize x card for y purpose, and the cards will feel like Just Another Button, I Guess.
(* - based on wording we do not technically know if each 4-card pack is 1 Damage/1 Mitigative/1 Curative + Lady/Lord. It is the most reasonable interpretation, makes the most occam's razer-style sense, and I am 95%+ sure this is the case...however we do not, actually, technically know this is the case. Their wording was somehow just vague enough to give me pause here. I do not think Yoshi was being coy on purpose, but nonetheless...)
This will feel quite strange.
This is all speculation. We do not know tooltips, and do not know what is to come. I am not particularly doomer about the upcoming situation, since I can already envision ways the current 60s Sleeve rotation could end up being pretty fun overall to execute. I am open-minded and welcome the opportunity ahead. However, the direction they have chosen does not make much sense, does not currently line up with the way the job has always played since its inception, and has potential to be a real albatross for Square.
Of course this could all be for naught and maybe the job ends up a banger once we see tooltips. I can definitely be missing something since I have not been involved in the rework process because my dad does not, actually, own Square Enix. Even if things look grim, there is opportunity for things to become fun even within the restrictions we already know of. I caution against excessive concern, but also implore a skeptical eye. I will keep an eye on things and may make another post once we see tooltips.
I will leave off with a good quote I saw earlier today as a sufficient-enough tl;dr:
"I can't say for certain whether new Astro is fun or not; I can say for certain they've removed things I find interesting about Astro."
Also that Galaxy From Beyond looks hecking AMAZING I can't wait for it to provide 40% mitigation and we get one step closer to AoE Hallowed Ground AST celebrating 4 expansions in a row with the best capstone baybeeeeee suck on them apples