Following up letter father

Malicious Compliance

2016.01.04 21:29 Not_An_Ambulance Malicious Compliance

People conforming to the letter, but not the spirit, of a request.
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2010.09.20 06:45 darthcaldwell r/CarTalk

The place to talk about your car
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2015.08.21 14:41 Iswitt DanielaSings: reddit loves Daniela Andrade

This is a place to talk about the talented Daniela Andrade. Anything related to her originals, covers, vlog, social media pages or concerts is welcome here. Feel free to also post fan art and whatnot as well.
[link]


2024.05.20 07:05 LucyAriaRose Conclusion 10 months later: AITA for breaking my fiancé's family tradition by naming my son what I wanted?

I am STILL NOT the Original Poster. That is still . She posted in and .
You can read the previous BORU's here and here. New Update marked with ****\* Thanks to u/Choice_Evidence1983 and u/Direct-Caterpillar77 for letting me know!
Trigger Warning: brief mention of murder
Mood Spoiler: happy ending
Original Post: April 16, 2023
Throwaway because I have in-laws on Reddit.
Myself (25F) and my fiancé (27M) have a 2 month old son. We are overjoyed at being parents, but most of my in-laws are refusing to even see our baby because of a decision we made concerning his name.
My in-laws have a tradition of giving the first-born son of every generation the same name. Let's say it's "Peter". This has been going on for about seven generations already, and they're very serious about it. My fiancé's eldest cousin was the latest person to get named Peter. Every one of his cousins has only had daughters so far, so our baby is the first son of his generation, and consequently should get the name.
I have no problem with the name Peter, and would've been okay with naming my son that. Unfortunately, that was also the name of my uncle, who died before I was born. I won't get into details, but it was tragic and traumatizing for my family. My father never got over losing his younger brother.
My grandmother asked the family not to name any of our future children Peter during her lifetime. My MIL and FIL knew about this promise, and at first seemed to not only be okay with us avoiding the name Peter, but also supportive of the one we chose.
However, my grandmother sadly passed away when I was 7 months pregnant. We traveled for her funeral. On our last days there, my in-laws called to offer me their condolences. Then my MIL asked me if I was willing to "think about the name Peter now."
Suddenly, they were insistent that the name we chose was awful and we had to honor their tradition. According to them, they had only agreed to make an exception for us for my grandmother's sake, and had no obligation to keep it now that she had passed.
My family agrees that while it's true we don't have to avoid the name anymore, it still doesn't feel right to use it. My fiancé agrees with me as well, but his parents spent the last weeks of my pregnancy trying to convince us to change our minds about the name.
When our baby was born and we named him what we wanted, my in-laws were furious that we had broken a 7-generation-old family tradition. Some of them hadn't previously wanted to name their sons Peter, but did it anyway for the family's sake. They said our decision was selfish, and that my family "should have moved on by now."
This has truly nothing to do with whether my family has moved on or not, it just felt like a betrayal to my grandmother and uncle's memories to even consider using the name.
My FIL offered us $1000 to change our son's name to Peter after he was born. That was two months ago, and neither of my fiancé's parents have met the baby or seen us since I was pregnant. Most of my in-laws are on their side, and this is causing a huge rift between my fiancé and his family. He assures me he's fine, but I'm starting to feel really guilty about this.
AITA?
EDIT: The tradition started, as far as I know, when OG Peter died and his son, also named Peter, named his firstborn after his father. Peter III ended up having the first son of the following generation, and did the same thing. That one died before having children, so his sister gave the name to her son, and so on. The name “Peter” is very common in my country, so none of them ever got bullied over it, and the fact that it was also my uncle’s name isn’t as unlikely as one might think.
Also, middle names aren’t used in my country. Most people get the maternal surname before the paternal one instead.
EDIT 2: It wasn't 1000 dollars. Different country, different currency. It's still a lot of money, but would probably translate to about 200 USD.
Relevant Comments:
Can you use Peter as a middle name?"
Our country/culture doesn't generally use middle names. If we did, I'd be willing to think about that, even though my son's name doesn't match "Peter"."
How many Peters are alive right now in your family???"
There are 3 living "Peters" in the family right now. Only the eldest (my fiancé's great uncle) actually goes by Peter. The other two have nicknames ("Pete", "Petey", etc)."
OOP is voted NTA
Update Post: May 24, 2023 (a bit over 1 month later)
(OOP's post was removed from AITA, and reposted on her profile. I'm using the date of the AITA post. Comments are also from AITA)
I posted this on AITA, but it got removed about an hour ago because I mentioned a violent encounter on an edit. I tried editing it out and getting it back up, but it didn't work. I'm posting here in case anyone still wants to read it.
Original
Thank you so much to everyone who commented and offered support. A lot has happened since I posted, so I thought I'd give you an update.
About a week after my post, my fiancé's parents contacted us. They apologized for their behavior, and begged to meet my son. They said they were ready to leave the naming debacle behind and truly wanted to be involved in their grandson's life.
We were skeptical, but invited them over to meet the baby. The visit went well. They began coming over almost every day during the next three weeks. I noticed neither of them ever called my son by his name, but I didn't point it out. For the first time in months, things seemed good between my fiancé and his parents.
One day, my fiancé was helping my FIL with something at our place, so my MIL and I went to the park with my baby. Some time later, I had to go to the bathroom, so I left him in the stroller with her.
When I got back, she was sitting on a park bench, chatting with a woman who was cooing over my son. I went over there and introduced myself as "(son's name)'s mom", and she said, "I thought his name was Peter."
I didn't say a word, and neither did my MIL. She followed me to the car and we went back to my apartment. On the way there, I texted my fiancé about what had happened. The moment we got there, he kicked both his parents out of our place.
He'd read my texts and confronted his father. Thankfully, my FIL is a terrible liar, and confessed immediately. Apparently, both my in-laws ONLY call my son Peter. That includes whenever they're talking about him, every time they introduce him to someone else, and even baby-talking to him on the few occasions they were left alone with him. Neither of them are embarrassed by this, and they both think they're in the right.
We're heartbroken. Especially my fiancé. Not only because his parents can't let go of their pride, but also because the name we chose for our son means a lot to us both.
I blame myself for encouraging my fiancé to allow them near our son. I was raised in a different city than all my grandparents, and always wished they could have been more involved in my life. Losing my grandmother didn't help. Pretty much every doubt I had only existed because I thought it would be important for my son to grow up with all of his grandparents around.
But now, all my guilt is gone. If they can't respect my son enough to call him by his name, they don't deserve to be in his life.
I hope they enjoyed the three weeks they had with their grandson. Because that's all they're getting until they get their heads out of their asses.
EDIT: I thought I'd clarify some things. First of all, I'm not comfortable sharing my son's name here, but I promise it's not a "yooneek" name or anything like that. It's perfectly normal and popular-ish in our country.
Secondly, I mentioned this in the comments, but while my family didn't try to dictate me on my son's name, they would never be comfortable with it. My uncle Peter passed almost three decades ago, but it forever changed everyone who knew him. My grandmother's wish might seem a bit irrational, but it was motivated entirely by grief and it didn't seem right to disrespect that just because she's not around anymore.
And to whoever PM'd me that my fiancé's only on my side to keep the peace, he didn't want to use the name either. Months before I got pregnant, he told me he hoped one of his cousins would have a son before we did, because he always hated the tradition and sympathized with my family. He's just as angry at his parents as I am, if not more. Also, most of his cousins and some other relatives have come around and apologized.
Relevant Comments:
Are they this unhinged in other areas of your life too?"
According to my fiancé, they've always been a little entitled, but I never really saw them enough to be able to say that. I will say that, though they were polite, they very clearly didn't care about me until we moved in together. My MIL pretended not to remember my name every time she saw me, and my FIL would lose interest in any conversations that weren't about him. Once it was clear me and my fiancé were in for long term, they started acting a lot more friendly towards me, but it never seemed sincere."
Have other family members come around yet?"
Most of my fiancé's cousins have come around, and his brother was always on our side. His grandmother and some of his aunts and uncles are with us too. His grandfather (divorced from his grandmother), two out of three living Peters (the two oldest) and pretty much everyone else are either still mad at us or haven't reached out to talk about it yet.
My entire family is on my side. They promised not to interfere in the naming process, but are relieved we didn't name him Peter."
One more note on the $1000 offered in the first post:
"And that's $1000 in MY country's currency. It roughly translates to $200USD." (note- OOP clarifies in a comment that she is Brazilian)
OOP drops this horrible bombshell about her uncle, the one who died before she was born:
"My uncle was murdered. My grandmother's request was motivated by trauma."
"Again; my family would be mostly fine with naming my son Peter. My dad and my aunt might have been uncomfortable, and my grandmother asked us all not to do so, but I wouldn't have been disowned if I had. It simply felt disrespectful, especially since my grandmother passed shortly before my son was born.
My uncle's death was traumatic for my family, but the name Peter is hugely common in my country."
Update Post 2: July 28, 2023 (3 months from first post)
My son is now 5 months old (almost six!). We're still NC with my fiancé's parents, who haven't seen us since May. We've both blocked them everywhere. His relatives who were on our side still are, and most of the ones who weren't haven't come around. If anything, they're even more pissed now.
I remember someone suggesting that my fiancé's family might stop using the name after we decided not to. Well, you were right. Last week, one of my fiancé's cousins announced she was pregnant with a boy. She included her baby's name in the announcement, and it's not Peter.
What followed was a string of aggressive Instagram DMs from both MIL and FIL. They both created accounts for the sole purpose of contacting me. I didn't see them until two days later. They sent me almost an hour worth of voice messages about how I'd "ruined their family".
They wish their son had never met me, that he'd see me for "who I truly am", and that I'd never gotten pregnant. Many of the messages ended with "I hope you're happy now", as if they thought they were getting the last word, only to think of something else they wanted to say. There was name calling, an accusation of me cheating, and the persistent refusal to refer to my son as their grandchild.
My fiancé and I listened to the messages together. He hadn't gotten any. As much as I tried to distance myself, I was in tears by the time it was all done. I still don't regret anything, specially after the stunt they pulled back in May, but I'm not completely free of the guilt yet. Not to mention their complete disregard for their grandson. I was already having an overwhelming week, and this just seemed like the final straw.
I must have spent close to an hour sobbing in my fiancé's arms. Once I was calmer, he unblocked his parents just to scream at them for a while. I only heard his side of the conversation, but it was more than enough. He finished the call by saying he didn't want to hear from them again.
We had a long talk afterwards. My fiancé opened up about the emotional blackmail by his family before and after my pregnancy. My in-laws were close to threatening him with anything they could if we didn't name our son Peter. I told him about my guilt, and how awful I feel for putting him through this. We reassured each other, cried a bit more, and had a mostly pleasant evening with our baby.
We contacted his cousin. The family is giving her shit for breaking the tradition again. They're being way less aggressive though, and I think many of my in-laws are finally learning to let go. We're not expecting any apologies anytime soon, but we'll be glad if they come.
Our wedding will be in September 2024, and whoever doesn't give us a sincere apology until then is uninvited. My fiancé's parents are banned either way. We came to that decision together.
Also, I'd like to address some comments on my previous update about how I was "letting my family's trauma win", or how the name wouldn't be hurtful now that my grandmother has passed.
I can't stress enough the damage my uncle's death caused. He was only 30 years old. He had a fiancée, a great career and his whole life ahead of him. I don't know many details about what happened, because I didn't want to upset my family by asking. My grandmother wasn't the only person hurt by this, my entire paternal family was. And if I remember correctly, the person responsible isn't even in jail anymore. It was more than 20 years ago, but the wound never truly closed.
So yeah, I think it's safe to say the tradition is over. The next Not-Peter will be here in January, right before my son's first birthday. It was never my intention for this to turn into such a shitstorm, but I'm so incredibly proud of my little family.
Thank you so much to everyone who shared their stories and offered advice during these last few months. I'll be forever grateful for all the support I got from y'all.
*****New Update Post: May 13, 2024 (13 months from OG post, about 10 from last post)****\*
Hey everyone, it's been a while. I hope you guys had a great Mother's Day!
I remember that last year, I promised myself I'd write a final update as soon as I felt calmer or felt the situation was closer to being solved. That actually happened months ago, but I've been busy lately.
Following my previous update, my fiancé's side of the family remained upset about the tradition being over for a few more months. They were way less intense about it, specially with the pregnant cousin I mentioned, but it was still evident.
That cousin's Not-Peter (almost a year later, I still can't think of a better term) was born in January. Our son turned one the next month. I think the fact that these two things happened so close together helped many of my in-laws let go of the tradition.
We got a few apologies we weren't expecting. Some of them were sincere enough that we slowly started reestablishing contact.
My fiancé's parents were not among those who apologized. We haven't spoken to either of them since last July. From what I've heard from some of his other relatives, however, MIL seems regretful. She has told some of them that she wishes she could be part of her grandson's life, and wonders if making his name a hill to die on was a bad decision. FIL, from what I gather, barely acknowledges my baby exists.
My fiancé knows about how his mother feels, but he says he doesn't care. And even if we did get an apology, I don't think either of us can forgive his parents. As much as we're mostly okay now, it sometimes feels like their treatment of our family ruined the first few months of our baby's life. I know that's not actually true, but I don't want them around my child.
Besides all that, things have been great. My son is 15 months old now, which I don't think I'll ever really get used to. He recently started drawing and has been expanding his vocabulary. He said "mamãe" first, by the way.
My fiancé and I are still getting married in September. We're thinking about moving abroad in a couple years (for work reasons), but we're not sure yet. We also recently got a dog (sadly, we didn't name him Peter).
This will be my final update. Whatever guilt I had about this situation a year ago is completely gone, and my life has been peaceful enough that it feels safe to say the shitshow is over.
Hugo, if you ever find this, you are the most fantastic thing that has ever happened to us. Thank you for letting me be your mom.
Thank you, Reddit, for all the love, advice and support you've given me this past year.
Relevant Comment:
Commenter: Whilst this may be your final update on the naming sage, you said you are getting married in September 2024 and MiL&FiL aren't going to be invited.
Prepare for more craziness from them at that time and good luck :)
OOP: I really do think this is over. My fiancé's parents don't know when or where we're getting married, so I'm not worried about them showing up. They haven't reached out to us in months, and we have no interest in contacting them.
submitted by LucyAriaRose to BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 07:02 SharkEva [New Update] - My son filed harassment charges against me and my husband because we were making him go to college

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/MentalPlatypus5193 posting in amiwrong
Concluded as per OOP
1 update - Medium
Thanks to u/colorsofautomn for finding this BORU
Original - 28th April 2024
Update1 - 10th May 2024

1 New Update
Update2 - - 18th May 2024

My son [19M] filed harassment charges against me and my husband because we were making him go to college

Me and my son moved to US last year. I was a single mom for 16 yrs before I met and then married my husband. I saved up money so he can go to college. Where I came from, college is very important. We moved to a small town and my son found new friends. These friends in my opinion were not a good influence. I am used to polite and academically oriented kids back home. These new friends of his make fun of his books and his plans of going to college.
Before his HS graduation, me and my husband took him to several unis in the state so he could get a feel for which one he would like to go to. Then after he graduated from HS, I told him I have about $20k saved up for college. He said it is not going to fit because tuition is pretty expensive nowadays. I suggested he can just go to a community college 20 mins away and live at home to save money. He agreed and I gave him access to the fund (joint account).
Long story short, he did not enroll himself and instead started partying a lot and used the money on expensive dates with his gf. He moved out and stopped talking to me. I worked hard to save that up for more than a decade and I am upset that he wasted it in less than a year. Me and my husband went to his place and asked that he pay me back since it is specifically for college and not "fun money".
He called the police and filed harassment charges. I told the police to review the cctv footage because the whole time I was talking to him through his ring cam, I was calm and reasonable and my husband was just standing behind me not saying anything. I was outside the door talking, he never even opened the door to talk to me face to face. The police said there's nothing he can do if my son and his gf felt "harassed", he can file a restraining order if he wants to.
Back home, this is unforgivable to treat your parent like this. But here in US, I was treated almost like a criminal. My sister in law said it is my fault for confronting him and that the money is his to spend since I made him a joint account owner. Am I wrong?
Edit: People cursing me because I said something about wanting to throw my chancla on my son's face, to be clear I have never laid my hands or my flip flops on him ever. But after what he did, my intrusive thoughts wants me to throw it but of course I won't. If he called the cops on me just because I want to talk to him, what more if I threw my flip flops on his face??
His relationship with me before moving to US was fine. He knew my struggle as a single mom and he always try to help me around the house. I was not strict at all he was free to go out with friends anytime. He was even thrilled to have a father figure and my husband always try to make him feel included in everything.

Comments

ManufacturerAny835
Lesson learned never give someone access to money unless you’re ok with them running away with it
OOP: He was a good boy before moving here. I thought he knew my struggles and how much I sacrificed to save money. I just thought he would never betray me like this.

dingdongsbtchs
Honestly I think a lot of parents don’t realize the depth of their children and forget that just because you think of them as one way doesn’t mean they don’t have other layers that can make them a different person. Sadly your son has found some less than savory friends to surround himself with and now he has to live with the decision he made. I honestly wouldn’t offer help for university again and would leave communication up to him. Also has there been any questions or discussion of potential drug use??

2workigo
The money is gone. And since he was a joint account holder and a legal adult, there’s nothing to be done except refuse to help him financially anymore. Let him figure it out on his own from now on. The friends he had will likely drift away now that he no longer has a fat bank account to fund their party lifestyle.

Treacle_Moon
Her biggest fault is waiting till it was all gone to do something about it. She had joint access. She could have stepped in long before now and tried to deal with it. Too little too late unfortunately.

Update - 12 days later

I still have not heard from my son and I don't expect him to reach out. But his gf's mother has called me asking if my house is still open to him. I asked her why, it turns out he hasn't paid his share of the last month's rent and his gf had to pay it for him.
I said it is not my problem and he is not welcome anymore in my house since he is an adult. The gf's mom said "what kind of mother would not extend help to his teenage son?". She further insulted me and said now she knows why he left me.
At this point I really don't care anymore. I tried to help him get a good start in life but he wasted it. Aside from the $20k, he lived rent free in the house, free food, free phone, car, gas money, and I pay all the utility bills and his health insurance. All I asked is that he focus on his studies. Finish at least an associate's degree so he can get a decent job and be fully independent from me asap.
For some who asked why college is so important to me, as an immigrant, we are held under certain standards. We have to prove to USCIS that we will not become a public charge -- meaning we won't rely on any government aid. I want him to be able to be a good immigrant and become productive. I don't even know if he can become a citizen if he makes below poverty income. I was just trying to make sure he gets to live a good life.
Some of you asked if he even wanted go to to college. Back when we were in our home country, he begged me to pls send him to college no matter what.
P.S. The harassment charge was closed for lack of evidence of harassment, a lot of what he said were lies.
Edit: Another thing that gave me chills was when he moved out it was the middle of the night and me and my husband were both asleep. My son left the front door hanging open (I saw it in the camera). We live in a small town but there's a lot of crime in our area, someone could have gone in and done something bad.

Comments

bluedreamer62
Some people just have to learn the hard way, his gf probably had a good time with him spending his college fund now 5hat it’s gone the fun is over. So comes the reality.

PoliteCanadian2
So you’re saying this is the Find Out stage that follows the Fuck Around stage?

Sharp_Mathematician6
Yep

SnooWords4839
His GF's mom has no right to bitch you out. Your son left, spend his college fund and now has to figure out how to adult. You do not owe him anything at this point.

ladyalcove
She's just calling her out because she's realizing that now she has to take care of this bum.

butterfly-garden
Yup. She, too, is in the Find Out stage.

** New Update*\*


Update 2 - 8 days later

His girlfriend's mom called me again today and basically handed the phone to my son to "sort it out between us". I let him just talk and tell me what is on his mind. Here's a summary of his point of view:
So basically he felt deprived as a kid and that he thinks he was just healing his inner child when he spent the money. He said his friends told him I owe that to him for bringing him to this world. He thinks that I should not have a child if I can't afford these things.
I asked him why he left the door open that night. He went silent for a few seconds then said "I just thought that if the house get robbed, I could just say I cashed the money from the bank and the robbers must have found it". Unbelievable.
At this point I was so emotional and I was a crying mess. I told him I am deeply sorry that I was his mom and that he had to grow up feeling deprived because I was poor. Then he said "Oh stop with your guilt tripping, you are saying that to make me feel bad.
Oh and he also said he hates it when I do this. I don't yell like that lady but I pretty much bug him to get up and help me set the table. I never get a response so I had to raise my voice higher. He said I was so rude. But he grew up with this. This is me being me. All moms back home do this. Al of a sudden he is comparing me to his mom's friends. In our culture we want food to be eaten while it is fresh from the stove. I spent 1 hr cooking after a long day at work, the least you can do is help me set the table and eat my food while it's nice and warm.
I hung up. My heart is broken in so much pieces. Am I wrong?

Comments

Whitewitchie
He has a chip on both shoulders. Leave him be. It's despicable he left the door open so you were vulnerable to burglars. Absolutely no consideration for your safety at all.

Mtndrums
Dude's a spoiled brat, and an idiot to not see his "friends" were using him. You need to cut him off and let him figure things out.
dublos
Not spoiled. Mom could not spoil him.
Entitled.
This child believes he's entitled to the same things his friends grew up with, even though his parents provided the best they could provide.
u/MentalPlatypus5193 your son has made his bed. Let him sleep in it.

I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP. Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments
submitted by SharkEva to BORUpdates [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 07:02 SharkEva AITA for not moving my wedding date? + 1 year update

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/user posting in AmItheAsshole
Concluded as per OOP
1 update - Medium
Original - 19th June 2023
Update - 18th May 2024

AITA for not moving my wedding date?

Not the A-hole My fiancé and I recently got engaged, and when looking at dates we realized our anniversary falls on a Saturday this year. Perfect right? We immediately start planning because it’s approximately 9 months out and we have to move quick to pull a wedding together. We told everyone the potential date this weekend and all seemed well.
Monday I get a phone call from my father. He insists that I move the date because my mother has a yoga retreat that weekend. I tell him that this date means a lot to me and I would prefer to keep it if there is any way to move the retreat. There is, but it’s expensive. I offer to pay for this change out of my wedding budget, essentially halving the amount that I can spend on the most important event of my life.
Yesterday I was told that they would not be taking my offer to pay to move the retreat and that we’re expected to move the wedding instead. I haven’t put money on my venue yet, so they think I should be fine with giving up the chance to marry on a date that means a lot to me. It became a massive fight, and now my parents and I aren’t speaking. My father accused me of caring about a date more than I care about my mother. I told him that it felt as though they were choosing yoga over their own daughter.
TLDR: wedding falls on the same day as moms yoga retreat. I haven’t put money down on the date yet and she has, but it means more to me than to her. Offers to pay to move the retreat were turned down. WIBTA if I keep my date and say that it’s me or the retreat?

Comments

imothro
Your parents are prioritizing a yoga retreat over your wedding? I told him that it felt as though they were choosing yoga over their own daughter. They 100% are. Have the wedding without them. NTA

Satogamii
And i would be petty and put on the photos why they weren't at the wedding. Op parents sucks. NTA.

z00k33per0304
Make them yoga poses too just for the extra flair.

apartment-flood
NTA - and the next time your parents invite you to something, tell them, "namaste at home"

**Judgement - NTA*\*

Update - 11 months later

Hey everyone! It's been a while (I forgot my password), but a few people asked for updates on how my last post turned out. Unfortunately, a lot of you may not like the answer.
Almost all of you said not to change the date, and to enjoy my time without them there. I followed half of that advice. I eventually did relent to my family and change the date of the wedding. My fiancé (now husband!) said that the date wasn't as important as my happiness, and the fighting with my parents was destroying that. Now after six months, we both wish we hadn't because it was useless.
They still didn't show up. Not only that, but they convinced 90% of my family not to show up either. I ended up with only four relatives there in a crowd of about 100 guests.
My mother claimed that I had been "excluding her from planning" (by scheduling venue tours on days that my fiancé and I were both free but I didn't realize she was working, and by finding my dress by surprise on a "just here to look" trip without her being there). They hadn't shown any interest in planning, so I mainly didn't want to bother them. To them, this was "clearly a sign that you don't want us there". So they went out of town on the new date.
In the end, narcissist mother still got her yoga, I still moved my date, and I still walked myself down the aisle.
But my petty self did, in fact, strike back. I had an amazing time, and I made sure that I left obvious empty seats marked for them and told everyone the truth with a smile when they asked. The few family members that did show are now no longer speaking to them either, as are all of the friends who came. The only exception is my brother (who I'm pretty sure they asked to relay the details of the party to them), and even he has almost entirely cut them out due to how they've acted.
I haven't spoken to my mother since about a month before the wedding, when she told me to get all of my old things out of her house. I speak to my father very rarely, and only over things like deaths in the family. My in-laws have basically taken me in as their own, and I'm far happier than I ever was in the nightmare of a family I grew up with. Life is good.
TLDR: moved the date of the wedding so mom could go to yoga, parents still didn't show, had a better day without them than I would have with them there, finally cut contact with those narcissists

Comments

Even_Enthusiasm7223
Great for you, The next time you contact them in any manner or let them know anything about your life is after you give birth and send them an announcement. Hey, I just like you to know that you are the proud grandparents of a child you will never meet. That's being petty

floridaeng
My petty side says when or if you have kids don't do anything to tell them. I would even say don't tell your brother unless he promises to not tell them. They have clearly shown they don't care about you and don't want any contact, so give them what they want.

DragonMaster7433
Good on you for going either very low contact or no contact with them. I looked through your old posts and saw where they wanted you to join a dinner date with another family member shortly before the actual dinner while you were busy. It wild to me how they seem to want you to respect their time and plans but have absolutely no respect for your time and plans.

I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.
Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments
submitted by SharkEva to BORUpdates [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 06:59 LongLocks1608 AITAH for refusing to cut my hair?

I made my first throw away account for this. Yipee (he said with all the excitement of a deflating woopie cushion).
I (M23) currently live with my mom (F64) and dad (M65). I'm attending a local community college and struggling to find a regular job while also pursuing a career as a writer and musician. I love my mom and dad very much, and they love me too. They have been nothing but supportive of me and my aspirations my entire life, and I am so grateful to them for that.
That isn't to say we don't have our issues (i wouldn't be talking about them on this sub if they were perfect, after all) but I think the context here is very important.
So, in exchange for no rent, i have to follow a set of rules. Some of them are pretty reasonable (no illegal drugs in the house, do my fill of chores, keep my room and bathroom clean, etc.), but some could be considered a bit weird (attend church once a week, no sex inside the house). While I'm okay with these rules, there is one i chafe against regularly… i have to maintain my haifacial hair in a very specific way.
So, as my username implies, I have long hair. It goes past my shoulders and rests at my upper back. It's also very thick. My mom likes to say my hair, like hers, wants to grow out, not down. (It really does feel like my hair wants to spite gravity sometimes). It defaults to curly ringlets, but I have options to style it.
It wasn't always like this, though. For a majority of my life, i kept my hair short. When i was 17 i heard about locks for love, the charity where you can donate your hair to create wigs for children undergoing cancer treatment. I was really inspired by this, and wanted to participate. I had to wait a year, until i graduated high school (because of our dress code and because i did a lot of theater stuff that required me to have short hair) to start. For four long years, I grew my hair out and finally, cut it off to send it to charity. It was really fun, we threw a small, silly party to celebrate.
But over the next few months, I began to realize something… i really liked having long hair! I've only now begun to verbalize it, but i felt confident and sexy with long hair. It was the first time I made a style choice on my own without involvement from anyone else and i loved it. So, thinking that this was a harmless form of self-expression, I decided I wanted to grow my hair out again, but this time keep it. And here, is where my troubles began.
Now, during the first time I started growing my hair out, my dad made it no secret he didn't like the long hair look, but went along with it because he knew it was for a good cause. But during the fall of 2021, when i made my intentions clear of mainting the look, he began to complain… a lot. Now, i'm not going to pretend some of these complaints were without merit. In terms of styling and hair care, I had no idea what I was doing, and combined with my big, bushy, unkempt beard, I looked terrible. I looked like a caveman Jerry Garcia. My hair was constantly knotted and greasy looking, i had split ends I refused to cut, and my beard was uneven. It drove dad up the wall.
Then, one morning, my parents forced me to go to a barbershop down the street. I went in, explained the situation, and told him i wanted to keep my long hair, but to get rid of all the stuff they didnt like. To shape it up, style it. The barber looked at me, and said it was too soon (it had been five months since i had sent my hair in) and to come back in a month. Satisfied, i texted my mother the news, got myself some lunch, picked up some groceries and came back home. My parents were waiting for me. I don't think Mom had seen my text. They were disappointed. A day or so later, dad came into my room as i was waking up, still wiping the dust from my eyes and gave me an ultimatum. I was going to cut my hair or he was going to kick me out of the house, and take my car too since his name was on the paperwork.
…To say the following two hours were eventful would be an understatement. In short, after lots of screaming, crying, and swearing, from both sides, we came to the agreement we have today; in exchange for keeping my hair tidy, and my beard trimmed, I could continue to live at my parents house. Whenever dads around, or we're out together, he wants me to have my hair tied back (nevermind that can actually damage the hair in the long term) or wear a headband to keep it out of my face.
While he's done a lot to regain my trust since that day (and I've done the same), i still feel uneasy about the whole thing. My dads explanation is that he's from another time, which is true. He grew up in the sixties and the seventies. If i were to fall through a portal in time, people off the street would probably think i was homeless or a hippie. That's how he thinks i look. And that terrifies him, because he thinks I don't know or understand how the way i portray myself can come off to others. It's also an issue of respect to him. In case it wasn't clear earlier, my dad is a Christian. He was a pastor in the Nazarene church for many years, but he's retired now. To him, growing my hair out like i have, after all the times he's expressed his dislike, is the equivalent of me flipping him off. Some of you may be wondering “How are these sentences related?” Well, if you open your bibles to Exodus 20:12, you will find the fifth commandment, which states “honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.” To say my faith is important to my dad is an understatement. The most important thing my to my dad, aside from the safety and health of me and mom, is whether or not i still believe Jesus Christ is my lord and savior. But im getting lost in the weeds, lets get back on track.
The point is, my dad sees this as a very personal insult, and a representation of all his fears that I might fail in life in a way that he can't prevent. That's how he's explained it to me. Im not trying to justify or explain away his behavior, I'm just trying to tell you what he's told me.
From my perspective, while Dad was right that my grooming at the time was terrible, my hair style does not, and should not, matter to him. I'll admit, at that time in my life, i was going through a really rough patch that i do not want to go into here. I had some awful habits back then, and i was clinically depressed. But coming in and saying you're gonna kick me out unless i give you what you want isn't what i would call christlike behavior, much less normal empathetic father figure behavior.
So why am i writing about this now? Because he did it again.
So, my dad has still been complaining since the three and a half years this happened, but I've been getting better and better at cleaning and maintaining my hair. Im not going to pretend I'm a master, but at least I'm not using two for one shampoo anymore and have learned how to consistently make a towel wrap. Today (sunday), dad got home from a business trip. When he got home, we didn't really say much because i was rushing to complete summer school homework due by midnight. We said Hi and I love you, but that was pretty much it. I had been working all day on this, since the moment i got up. I missed church because i was exhausted from staying up late, you guessed it, working. After all this time, i finally do it, and go out to have an actual conversation with my dad. And the first thing he says to me during this conversation? After not seeing me since Thursday? “[Long locks], you really need to do something about my hair. You need to remember our agreement. It's becoming a problem.”
Wow. Thanks for the veiled threat dad, nice to see you too.
I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like i cannot please him. I'm just now getting the hang of this, and its like… he doesn't care. I went to a new barber six weeks ago to cut off my split ends and shape it up. I trim my beard every 4-8 weeks. I shampoo, rinse, condition, rinse, dry, comb with a wide tooth comb, comb with an actual brush and then maybe use a band if dads around, AND ITS STILL NOT ENOUGH. The one day i don't do my hair because i am trying to prioritize the things that matter and he says that.
And the thing that bothers me is that it brings me down all the time. It affects my self-esteem and self-image. And he keeps dangling my ability to live a life over my head unless i give him what he wants, and it makes me wonder where will it end? What will he want me to change next? Will he threaten to take away my clothes? Stuff i bought with the allowance he gives me? This thing that happened today made me realize i am so helplessly dependent on these people and I can't take it anymore. So my thought process is why don't i just save us the trouble of all the shouting, crying and swearing, pack up my bags and leave? Lets save the time and trouble and move on because I don't want to fight.
I'm sorry if this has devolved into an incomprehensible slurry, but I've been trying to write this all down for an hour and i'm so tired. I don't want to give up this piece of myself that I've grown to love. But am I being a big stupid baby about this? Should i just give him what he wants? Or should i take a stand for my own personal boundaries and identity and move out? And if the latter, what should my next steps be?
Thank you for reading this wall of runes. I'm going to pass out now. Good night.
submitted by LongLocks1608 to AITAH [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 06:57 TheMetalGodX Can Anyone For the Love Of Piper Help Me? LOL

Okay I have been playing for the last few weeks since the NG update came out and surprisingly at first the game was running smooth with mods. Ever since F4SE and related mods have been updating I have literally had the game crash on me every 5 to 10 minutes. I have scoured the internet and tried every fix I could find to no avail. Buffout 4 hasnt been updated for NG yet so I am not getting crash reports.
Here's my PC Specs:
AMD Ryzen 9 5950X at 5.6Ghz
64GB Ram at 3600Mhz
Nvidia RTX 4080
Samsung 970 Evo M.2 SSD
I shouldn't have hardware issues with this game.

Here is my load order straight from LOOT, if I am missing a compatibility issue somewhere please let me know. I have spent 2 days making sure these are working with the NG Update. Thank you!
0 0 Fallout4.esm
1 1 DLCRobot.esm
2 2 DLCworkshop01.esm
3 3 DLCCoast.esm
4 4 DLCworkshop02.esm
5 5 DLCworkshop03.esm
6 6 DLCNukaWorld.esm
7 7 DLCUltraHighResolution.esm
254 FE 0 ccbgsfo4018-gaussrifleprototype.esl
254 FE 1 ccbgsfo4019-chinesestealtharmor.esl
254 FE 2 ccBGSFO4044-HellfirePowerArmor.esl
254 FE 3 ccfsvfo4001-modularmilitarybackpack.esl
254 FE 4 ccfsvfo4002-midcenturymodern.esl
254 FE 5 cceejfo4001-decorationpack.esl
254 FE 6 ccgcafo4003-factionws03bos.esl
254 FE 7 ccgcafo4011-factionws11vt.esl
254 FE 8 ccgcafo4013-factionas02bos.esl
254 FE 9 ccgcafo4022-factionas11vt.esl
254 FE a ccawnfo4001-brandedattire.esl
8 8 ccswkfo4001-astronautpowerarmor.esm
254 FE b ccbgsfo4055-dghusk.esl
254 FE c ccfrsfo4002-antimaterielrifle.esl
254 FE d ccbgsfo4076-pipmystery.esl
254 FE e ccgrcfo4002-pipgreenvim.esl
254 FE f ccsbjfo4001-solarflare.esl
9 9 cczsef04001-bhouse.esm
254 FE 10 ccqdrfo4001_powerarmorai.esl
254 FE 11 ccBGSFO4115-X02.esl
254 FE 12 ccrzrfo4002-disintegrate.esl
254 FE 13 ccBGSFO4116-HeavyFlamer.esl
254 FE 14 ccBGSFO4110-WS_Enclave.esl
254 FE 15 ccBGSFO4096-AS_Enclave.esl
10 a cczsefo4002-smanor.esm
254 FE 16 ccacxfo4001-vsuit.esl
254 FE 17 ccFSVFO4007-Halloween.esl
254 FE 18 ccsbjfo4002_manwellrifle.esl
11 b cctosfo4002_neonflats.esm
254 FE 19 ccbgsfo4117-capmerc.esl
254 FE 1a ccBGSFO4046-TesCan.esl
254 FE 1b ccSBJFO4003-Grenade.esl
254 FE 1c ccOTMFO4001-Remnants.esl
12 c Unofficial Fallout 4 Patch.esp
13 d ArmorKeywords.esm
14 e HUDFramework.esm
15 f WorkshopFramework.esm
254 FE 1d BakaFramework.esm
254 FE 1e PPF.esm
254 FE 1f Community Fixes Merged.esp
254 FE 20 TMR_GlitchfinderAIO.esm
16 10 SS2.esm
17 11 SS2_XPAC_Chapter2.esm
18 12 SS2_XPAC_Chapter3.esm
19 13 DiamondCity-OverridePatch.esp
20 14 AmericaRising2.esm
254 FE 21 REFramework.esm
21 15 SettlementKeywords.esm
22 16 YouAndWhatArmy2.esm
254 FE 22 RunningWithHandsAnim.esl
23 17 Homemaker.esm
254 FE 23 SS2WorkshopHUDOverride.esl
24 18 Robot Home Defence.esm
25 19 Darlene.esm
254 FE 24 StandaloneWorkbenches.esl
254 FE 25 Rebuild_SharedResources.esm
254 FE 26 DiamondCityAmbience.esl
254 FE 27 IDEKsLogisticsStation2.esl
26 1a CALIBER-COMPLEX.esm
254 FE 28 Leah's Daisy Chains.esl
254 FE 29 PPF-HeavyFlamer-CR.esm
254 FE 2a PPF-NeonFlats-CR.esm
27 1b Settlement Electricity Overhaul.esm
254 FE 2b WG City Plans Pack ESL.esl
254 FE 2c sanctuaryWG.esl
254 FE 2d Fortress Sanctuary - Copy.esl
254 FE 2e Bunker Hill Mega City.esl
254 FE 2f SetMaxSettlers.esl
254 FE 30 SimpleProstitutes.esl
254 FE 31 Vee_SS2_Chapter2_SettlersEssentialPatch.esl
254 FE 32 Vee_SS2_SettlersEssentialPatch.esl
254 FE 33 MM-Castle-HQ-By-Tarkkh-V2.6.esl
254 FE 34 Castle Minutemen HQ level 2 layout.esl
254 FE 35 Castle Minutemen HQ level 3 layout.esl
254 FE 36 VUVC-CityPlan.esl
254 FE 37 GavMan_Vault88_CityPlan.esl
254 FE 38 GavMan_Vault88_Layouts.esl
254 FE 39 CanarySaveFileMonitor.esl
254 FE 3a HiPolyFacesCompanionPlugin.esl
254 FE 3b Dank_ArmorPaintExtended.esl
28 1c UneducatedReload.esm
29 1d Games.esm
30 1e BarstoolGames.esm
254 FE 3c EssentialNPCsExpanded.esl
31 1f OVT.esp
254 FE 3d Enhanced Vanilla Armor and Clothing.esp
254 FE 3e Fixed Gobo Effects.esp
254 FE 3f DiamondCityBillboards.esp
254 FE 40 FO4ParticlePatch.esp
32 20 ImmersiveGenericDialogues.esp
33 21 Armorsmith Extended.esp
34 22 Rebuild_Settlements.esp
35 23 CombinedArmsNV.esp
36 24 CombinedArmsEXPack.esp
254 FE 41 FallUI_CALIBER_COMPLEX_PATCH.esp
37 25 Armament.esp
254 FE 42 CombinedArmsIntegrationProject - Armament.esp
38 26 ImmersiveCleaning.esp
39 27 3DNPC_FO4.esp
254 FE 43 3DNPC_FO4-Patch.esp
40 28 CleanMySettlement.esp
41 29 BTInteriors_Project.esp
254 FE 44 RebuildBTI Necessary Changes.esp
42 2a SimHomestead2.esp
254 FE 45 OCsUniversityPoint.esp
43 2b Unique NPCs.esp
254 FE 46 DiverseSettlers.esp
254 FE 47 DIverseSettlersImmersionQoL.esp
44 2c DCGuard_Overhaul.esp
45 2d WeightlessMods.esp
46 2e WeaponModFixes-GOTY.esp
47 2f AWKCR - Mod Power Armor Engine Glitch Fix.esp
254 FE 48 MiscAnimTweaks.esp
48 30 RAW INPUT.esp
49 31 JumpFallPoseFix.esp
50 32 GrenadeCombatFixes.esp
254 FE 49 Flutter Flicker Fixer For Foliage.esp
254 FE 4a WhoIsTheGeneral.esp
254 FE 4b Keep Radiants In Commonwealth.esp
51 33 AttachPack.esp
254 FE 4c Attach Pack Modcol.esp
254 FE 4d OCsAtomCatsGarage.esp
52 34 DEEPriverV1.6.esp
53 35 BTInt_Optimization.esp
254 FE 4e LOST Sim Settlements 2 Patch.esp
54 36 SS2Extended.esp
254 FE 4f OCsSunkenGarage.esp
254 FE 50 Rebuild_Covenant.esp
254 FE 51 3DNPC-eXoPatch.esp
254 FE 52 LOST Bleachers 2 Patch.esp
55 37 the library.esp
254 FE 53 Rebuild_Settlements_Previs.esp
254 FE 54 OCsFiddlersGreen.esp
254 FE 55 Dank_ArmorOverrides.esp
56 38 SuperMutantRedux.esp
254 FE 56 LOST Super Mutant Redux Patch.esp
57 39 WeightlessAid_BetterItemSorting.esp
58 3a Crafting Mastery.esp
59 3b DCVendorOverhaulAIO.esp
60 3c The House.esp
254 FE 57 The House - eXoPatch.esp
61 3d OutcastsAndRemnants.esp
254 FE 58 the library - eXoPatch.esp
62 3e AnimatedCandles.esp
63 3f Depravity.esp
64 40 Vault4.esp
65 41 Stm_DiamondCityExpansion.esp
254 FE 59 DiamondCityExpansion-eXoPatch.esp
254 FE 5a Vault4-eXoPatch.esp
66 42 DiamondNewVendors.esp
67 43 TrainBar.esp
68 44 Sanctuary Pre-Walled.esp
69 45 AA FusionCityRising.esp
70 46 3DNPC_FO4_DLC.esp
254 FE 5b fakeInt.esp
254 FE 5c OCsDartmouthSkyscraper.esp
71 47 BTInt_Menus.esp
72 48 AmazingFollowerTweaks.esp
73 49 DCVendorClutter.esp
VCM_Sanctuary_Navmesh_Update_W_Roof.esp
74 4a f4killingthebugs2.esp
254 FE 5d Dank_ArmorOverrides_DLCCoast.esp
75 4b KOTOR.esp
254 FE 5e CombinedArms_CALIBER_COMPLEX_PATCH.esp
76 4c CheatTerminal.esp
77 4d InstituteSettlements2.esp
78 4e TU3SD4Y'S Commonwealth Responders.esp
254 FE 5f 3DNPC_FO4[Previsibines].esp
79 4f BetterSettlers.esp
254 FE 60 BG_UnderArmor_Fix.esp
80 50 W.A.T.Minutemen.esp
81 51 MilitarizedMinutemen.esp
82 52 Settlement_Markers.esp
83 53 MinutemenPropaganda.esp
254 FE 61 SS2_RobotMod.esp
84 54 Flashy_CrimeAndPunishment.esp
85 55 3DNPC_FO4Settler.esp
86 56 SS2_FDK_TinyLiving.esp
87 57 AA 50 Ways To Die.esp
88 58 Crafting Mastery - Armor Keywords Patch.esp
254 FE 62 CutContentNPCsAiO.esp
254 FE 63 Nova Uniques Combined Arms.esp
254 FE 64 Dank_ECO.esp
254 FE 65 Diamond City Supplements.esp
254 FE 66 GoodneighborView.esp
89 59 0_Vault120.esp
254 FE 67 Dank_WOP-CombinedArms.esp
90 5a ProjectValkyrie.esp
91 5b Eli_Armour_Compendium.esp
92 5c BosskCompanion.esp
254 FE 68 FiddlersGreenTftCPatch.esp
93 5d CloneTrooperCompanion_1.esp
254 FE 69 PRP-SS2-Fixes-Ch2.esp
94 5e CloneArmoryWeapons2.0.esp
95 5f SS2-Jampads2.esp
96 60 WattzLaserGun.esp
254 FE 6a Rebuild_Covenant_Previs.esp
97 61 llamaCompanionHeatherv2.esp
254 FE 6b FiddlersGreenTarberrySwap.esp
98 62 SS2WastelandVenturers.esp
99 63 [SS2 Addon] SimSettlements SuperStructures.esp
254 FE 6c TerrainUndersides.esp
100 64 FO4 NPCs Travel.esp
101 65 Cho1_SS2_Encv_Plots.esp
254 FE 6d ss2c23dnpcpatch.esp
102 66 RU556.esp
254 FE 6e OCsDartmouthSkyscraperExperimental.esp
103 67 RosieAtSomervilleAiO.esp
254 FE 6f PRP-SS2-Fixes-Ch1.esp
104 68 SigMCX.esp
254 FE 70 PuddleReflectionFix.esp
105 69 Less Annoying Berry Mentats.esp
254 FE 71 Dogmeat Follow Behind.esp
106 6a EasyHacking.esp
107 6b OutlineWorkshopShader.esp
254 FE 72 M8rDisablePipboyEffects.esp
108 6c LooksMenu.esp
109 6d Complex Vendors.esp
110 6e BlockingOverhaul.esp
254 FE 73 Chemfluence AI Combat Dynamics.esp
111 6f DLC Timing.esp
254 FE 74 DLC Timing - UFO4P Patch.esp
254 FE 75 WTG - KRIC Patch.esp
112 70 dcc-molotov-nerf.esp
254 FE 76 LegendariesTheyCanUse.esp
254 FE 77 No Sneaking in Power Armor.esp
113 71 Faster Terminal Displays (20x).esp
114 72 WeightlessJunk.esp
254 FE 78 LOST WATM Patch.esp
115 73 WeightlessSpecialAmmo.esp
116 74 CarryWeight99999.esp
254 FE 79 Legendary Mutation Messages Fix.esp
254 FE 7a Gloomy Glass.esp
254 FE 7b VividFallout - AiO - BestChoice.esp
254 FE 7c Targeted Textures.esp
254 FE 7d WAVE.esp
117 75 ScopeOverlayDOF.esp
118 76 RemoveBlur.esp
119 77 dD-Enhanced Blood Basic.esp
254 FE 7e Robot_Textures_Redone.esp
120 78 ValiusHDTextures2K.esp
121 79 Synth Overhaul.esp
122 7a Synth Overhaul - No level requirements Patch.esp
123 7b Synth Overhaul - Black Patch.esp
124 7c TrueGrass.esp
125 7d SuperMutantRedux VIS Patch.esp
126 7e SettlementMenuManager.esp
127 7f Homemaker - Streetlights Use Passive Power.esp
128 80 Homemaker - Unlocked Institute Objects.esp
254 FE 7f SS2_DLCSettlerPatch.esp
254 FE 80 SS2Extended_OutfitInjectionPatch.esp
129 81 SS2_CityPlanPack_RiseOfTheCommonwealth.esp
130 82 Quieter Settlements - Contraptions.esp
131 83 Quieter Settlements - Vanilla.esp
132 84 Quieter Settlements - Wasteland Workshop.esp
133 85 Robot Home Defence - Settlement Keywords.esp
134 86 nimroutroguesyntharmorstandalone.esp
135 87 SGOWastelandExpansion.esp
136 88 Brick_By_Brick_Master.esp
137 89 AtomicRadio.esp
138 8a FunctionalDisplays-Collectibles.esp
139 8b BetterCompanions.esp
140 8c DarleneDLC.esp
254 FE 81 LiveLove - Heather_Valkyrie.esp
141 8d ImmersiveVendors.esp
142 8e KSHairdos.esp
143 8f LooksMenu Customization Compendium.esp
144 90 AzarPonytailHairstyles.esp
145 91 Unique NPCs FarHarbor.esp
146 92 WorkshopTurretsDontHarmPlayerPerk.esp
254 FE 82 DiverseSettlersFarHarbor.esp
147 93 BetterSettlersMostlyFemale.esp
148 94 BetterSettlersCCAPack2.0.esp
149 95 Unique NPCs_SpecialSettlers_All.esp
150 96 HiPolyFaces.esp
151 97 CBBE.esp
152 98 Extended weapon mods.esp
153 99 CROSS_Cybernetics.esp
254 FE 83 LOST Cybernetics Patch.esp
154 9a CROSS_Cybernetics_NoRobotFootStepSounds.esp
155 9b LightsaberMod.esp
254 FE 84 CROSS_CourserStrigidae.esp
156 9c Craftable Armor Size - Fix Material Requirements.esp
157 9d Craftable Armor Size.esp
158 9e ChineseStealthSuit.esp
159 9f Tactical Flashlights.esp
160 a0 Tactical Flashlights - Settings.esp
254 FE 85 LOST Unique NPCs Patch.esp
161 a1 Unique_NPCs_SuperMutantRedux.esp
162 a2 Tactical Flashlights Armorsmith Patch.esp
163 a3 Eli_ArmourCollection.esp
164 a4 RichMerchants.esp
165 a5 LooksMirror.esp
166 a6 Crafting Mastery - CC Chinese Stealth Armor Patch.esp
254 FE 86 Dank_ArmorOverrides_DLCNukaWorld.esp
167 a7 Crafting Mastery - AE Patch.esp
254 FE 87 SS2_XDI Patch.esp
254 FE 88 Attach Pack Mod Description Fixes.esp
254 FE 89 SprintOutOfCombat.esp
168 a8 DynamicOutfitting_CBBE.esp
169 a9 The Eyes Of Beauty.esp
254 FE 8a aBitPrettierNWRaiders.esp
170 aa [LOUDER] PowerArmorVoiceChanger.esp
254 FE 8b DiverseMinutemen.esp
254 FE 8c WeAreTheDiverseMinutemen.esp
254 FE 8d DiverseBoS.esp
254 FE 8e DiverseDCSecurity.esp
254 FE 8f Face Fixes - All in One.esp
254 FE 90 Dank_ECO-INNR.esp
254 FE 91 Dank_ECO_DLCCoast.esp
254 FE 92 Dank_ECO_DLCNukaWorld.esp
254 FE 93 Dank_ECO_DLCRobot.esp
254 FE 94 Eli_Armour_Compendium_LIF.esp
254 FE 95 Combat AI Empowered - Tweaked Accuracy.esp
FakeIntNacXTrueStormDApatch.esp
171 ab VATSFreezeFixNextGen.esp
172 ac Vault88AreaExtension.esp
173 ad Wu9DoubleGeneratorPower.esp
254 FE 96 SS2_Addon_Favelabulous.esp
174 ae SS2_Addon_R2R.esp
175 af SS2_ruined_simsettlement_addonpack.esp
176 b0 SS2_STRA_Buildings_and_Skins.esp
177 b1 SS2_STRA_Support_Buildings.esp
178 b2 SS2ConveyorStorage.esp
179 b3 PiperOverhaul2F1E.esp
254 FE 97 SS2_MagnussonTerminalFix.esp
180 b4 BlasTech E-11.esp
254 FE 98 Lightsaber_NoLL.esp
181 b5 CW Stormtrooper.esp
182 b6 BosskBountyHunter.esp
254 FE 99 OCsAtomCatsGarageGenericAtomCats.esp
183 b7 ProjectSynth.esp
184 b8 AE Animated Jetpacks.esp
185 b9 FO4LaserBolts.esp
186 ba CloneArmory4.0.esp
187 bb CloneTrooperCompanionArmoryPatch.esp
188 bc Thematic and Practical.esp
189 bd Thematic and Practical - DLC.esp
190 be JunkTownTwo.esp
191 bf GarageHomesAndSensibleSecurity.esp
192 c0 BMW_ALA.esp
193 c1 SKKGlobalStashScrapping.esp
254 FE 9a CompanionStatus-Settings.esp
194 c2 CompanionStatus.esp
195 c3 DCE_female_body_replacer.esp
254 FE 9b DCENS.esp
254 FE 9c CBBEHR.esp
254 FE 9d CBBEHR_3DNPC.esp
254 FE 9e CBBEHR_SS2.esp
254 FE 9f CBBEHR_SS2Ch2.esp
254 FE a0 SS2-3DNPC-Settlers.esp
196 c4 SKKCompanionWeaponLL.esp
197 c5 SS2-PraRandomAddon.esp
198 c6 X12Plasmacaster.esp
254 FE a1 SigMCX_LvlListPatch.esp
254 FE a2 SigMCX_MaterialPack.esp
254 FE a3 OCsSunkenGarageGhoulSettlers.esp
254 FE a4 No More Fake Puddles - Nuka World 1-0.esp
254 FE a5 IDEKsLogisticsStation2_SS2_Patch.esp
199 c7 SS-ILS2 patch.esp
200 c8 DX_Predator.esp
254 FE a6 LOST 50 Ways to Die Patch.esp
254 FE a7 LOST Beantown Interiors Patch.esp
254 FE a8 LOST Better Companions Patch.esp
254 FE a9 LOST Bleachers Patch.esp
254 FE aa LOST Cheat Terminal Patch.esp
254 FE ab LOST Chinese Sealth Patch.esp
254 FE ac LOST Companion Status Patch.esp
254 FE ad LOST Complex Vendors Patch.esp
254 FE ae LOST Courser Strigidae Patch.esp
254 FE af LOST Darlene Patch.esp
254 FE b0 LOST Depravity Patch.esp
254 FE b1 LOST Diamond City Expansion Patch.esp
254 FE b2 Eli_Armour_Compendium_Tweaks_ECO.esp
254 FE b3 LOST Eli Compendium Patch.esp
254 FE b4 LOST Fourville Patch.esp
254 FE b5 LOST Fusion City Rising Patch.esp
254 FE b6 LOST Global Stash Patch.esp
254 FE b7 LOST Heather Patch.esp
254 FE b8 LOST Homemaker Patch.esp
254 FE b9 LOST Militarized BLUE Patch.esp
254 FE ba LOST NPC Travel Patch.esp
254 FE bb LOST Outcasts and Remnants Patch.esp
254 FE bc LOST Project Valkyrie Patch.esp
254 FE bd LOST RU556 Patch.esp
254 FE be LOST Settlement Menu Manager Patch.esp
254 FE bf LOST Settlers of the Commonwealth Patch.esp
254 FE c0 LOST SS2 Chapter 2 Patch.esp
254 FE c1 LOST SS2 Extended Patch.esp
254 FE c2 LOST Synth Overhaul Patch.esp
254 FE c3 LOST Tactical Flashlights Patch.esp
254 FE c4 LOST Tales Commonwealth Patch.esp
LOST Visible Companion Affinity Patch.esp
254 FE c5 LOST Wattz Laser Patch.esp
254 FE c6 LOST Workshop Framework Patch.esp
254 FE c7 LOST CC Anti-Materiel Rifle Patch.esp
254 FE c8 LOST CC Capital Wasteland Patch.esp
254 FE c9 LOST CC Capt Cosmos Patch.esp
254 FE ca LOST CC Charlestown Condo Patch.esp
254 FE cb LOST CC Chinese Armor Patch.esp
254 FE cc LOST CC Gauss Prototype Patch.esp
254 FE cd LOST CC Graphic T-Shirt Pack Patch.esp
254 FE ce LOST CC Heavy Incinerator Patch.esp
254 FE cf LOST CC Hellfire Patch.esp
254 FE d0 LOST CC Home Decor Patch.esp
254 FE d1 LOST CC Manwell Rifle Patch.esp
254 FE d2 LOST CC Military Backpack Patch.esp
254 FE d3 LOST CC Modern Furniture Patch.esp
254 FE d4 LOST CC Neon Flats Patch.esp
254 FE d5 LOST CC Sentinel System Patch.esp
254 FE d6 LOST CC Shroud Manor Patch.esp
254 FE d7 LOST CC Solar Cannon Patch.esp
254 FE d8 LOST CC Tesla Cannon Patch.esp
254 FE d9 LOST CC Vault Suit Patch.esp
254 FE da LOST CC X-02 Patch.esp
254 FE db LOST CC Zetan Arsenal Patch.esp
254 FE dc CombinedArmsEX_CALIBER_COMPLEX_PATCH.esp
254 FE dd Deliverer_CALIBER_COMPLEX_PATCH.esp
254 FE de DLCCoast_RadiumRifle_CALIBER_COMPLEX_PATCH.esp
FG-42 Ausf.E ParaTroop Rifle_No TR_CALIBER_COMPLEX_PATCH.esp
254 FE df SIGMCX_CALIBER_COMPLEX_PATCH.esp
254 FE e0 Combined Arms EX_LLI.esp
254 FE e1 Combined Arms_LLI.esp
254 FE e2 Star Wars - The Lightsaber_LLI.esp
201 c9 DT_GunnerOutfitPack.esp
254 FE e3 Gunner Outfit Replacer.esp
254 FE e4 Rebuild_Workshop.esp
202 ca MyCityPlans(4).esp
203 cb Passthrough.esp
204 cc ConnectedWorkshops.esp
254 FE e5 Invisible and Longer Power Lines.esp
205 cd DEEPriver NoRads.esp
206 ce SimSettlements2_AddOnPack_ApocalypticAdditions_SirLach.esp
207 cf SS2_SIMPDDDD.esp
208 d0 ohSIM_Sim2_Settlements_Scrappers_Addon.esp
254 FE e6 SS2Addon_MS_BareEssentials.esp
254 FE e7 SS2AOP_VaultTecTools.esp
209 d1 SS2_WastelandDefense.esp
210 d2 AutoDoors.esp
254 FE e8 Rebuild_SharedResources_AutoDoors.esp
211 d3 Faction Pack Template.esp
254 FE e9 ProjectValkyrie-SS2-Patch.esp
212 d4 RandomSettlers.esp
254 FE ea RandomSettlers - LevelUp.esp
213 d5 SS2UI.esp
254 FE eb WastelandResources.esp
254 FE ec Raze My Settlement.esp
254 FE ed Armament - Caliber Complex Patch.esp
254 FE ee Armament-ECO_PatchUpdate.esp
214 d6 KSHairsFemsheppingRadbeetle.esp
215 d7 KSHairdos_oel.esp
216 d8 Lots More Facial Hair.esp
254 FE ef LKsAbbot.esp
254 FE f0 LKsAllanLee.esp
254 FE f1 LKsAnnCodman.esp
254 FE f2 LKsAnneHargraves.esp
254 FE f3 LKsArturoRodrigues.esp
254 FE f4 LKsBeckyFallon.esp
254 FE f5 LKsBlakeAbernathy.esp
254 FE f6 LKsCarla.esp
254 FE f7 LKsCathy.esp
254 FE f8 LKsClairHutchins.esp
254 FE f9 LKsConnieAbernathy.esp
254 FE fa LKsDarcyPembroke.esp
254 FE fb LKsDeacon.esp
254 FE fc LKsDeb.esp
254 FE fd LKsDesdemona.esp
254 FE fe LKsDoctorCarrington.esp
254 FE ff LKsDoctorDuff.esp
254 FE 100 LKsDoctorSun.esp
254 FE 101 LKsElliePerkins.esp
254 FE 102 LKsFahrenheit.esp
254 FE 103 LKsFather.esp
254 FE 104 LKsFredAllen.esp
254 FE 105 LKsGeneva.esp
254 FE 106 LKsGeorgeCooper.esp
254 FE 107 LKsGlory.esp
254 FE 108 LKsHarvey.esp
254 FE 109 LKsHenryCooke.esp
254 FE 10a LKsJoeSavoldi.esp
254 FE 10b LKsJohn.esp
254 FE 10c LKsJunLong.esp
254 FE 10d LKsKasumiNakano.esp
254 FE 10e LKsKay.esp
254 FE 10f LKsKellogg.esp
254 FE 110 LKsKenjiNakano.esp
254 FE 111 LKsKessler.esp
254 FE 112 LKsLucyAbernathy.esp
254 FE 113 LKsMamaMurphy.esp
254 FE 114 LKsMarcyLong.esp
254 FE 115 LKsMariner.esp
254 FE 116 LKsMarovski.esp
254 FE 117 LKsMaxson.esp
254 FE 118 LKsMayorMcDonough.esp
254 FE 119 LKsMoeCronin.esp
254 FE 11a LKsMyrna.esp
254 FE 11b LKsOldLongfellow.esp
254 FE 11c LKsPaladinDanse.esp
254 FE 11d LKsPastorClemens.esp
254 FE 11e LKsPaulPembroke.esp
254 FE 11f LKsPickman.esp
254 FE 120 LKsPolly.esp
254 FE 121 LKsPorterCage.esp
254 FE 122 LKsPrestonGarvey.esp
254 FE 123 LKsProfessorScara.esp
254 FE 124 LKsReiNakano.esp
254 FE 125 LKsRexGoodman.esp
254 FE 126 LKsRonnieShaw.esp
254 FE 127 LKsRufusRubin.esp
254 FE 128 LKsScarlett.esp
254 FE 129 LKsScribeHaylen..esp
254 FE 12a LKsSheffield.esp
254 FE 12b LKsSierraPetrovita.esp
254 FE 12c LKsSolomon.esp
254 FE 12d LKsStanSlavin.esp
254 FE 12e LKsSturges.esp
254 FE 12f LKsTinkerTom.esp
254 FE 130 LKsTonySavoldi.esp
254 FE 131 LKsTravisMiles.esp
254 FE 132 LKsTrudy.esp
254 FE 133 LKsVadimBobrov.esp
254 FE 134 LKsVaultTecRep.esp
254 FE 135 LKsWolfgang.esp
254 FE 136 LKsX6-88.esp
254 FE 137 LKsYefimBobrov.esp
254 FE 138 Dank_ArmorOverrides_DLCRobot.esp
254 FE 139 Dank_INNRoverride.esp
217 d9 TGF_TrueGrassFix.esp
218 da NPCRespawnFix.esp
254 FE 13a Dank_ECO_UneducatedReload.esp
254 FE 13b SS2_AFT.esp
254 FE 13c AFTSpouseTweaks.esp
219 db AFT_Alt_Names_Pack1.esp
254 FE 13d Community Fixes Merged - Weapon Mod Fixes Patch.esp
254 FE 13e MinutemenPropaganda SMM.esp
220 dc BarstoolGames_FH.esp
221 dd BarstoolGames_NW.esp
222 de SS2_CLB_WATMPack.esp
254 FE 13f REPatch_AmericaRising2LegacyOfTheEnclave.esp
254 FE 140 Lightweight Lighting.esp
254 FE 141 WET.esp
254 FE 142 PRP.esp
254 FE 143 3DNPC_BTI_Optimization.esp
254 FE 144 RebuildBTIPrevisPatch.esp
254 FE 145 OCsBreakHeartBanks.esp
254 FE 146 OCsProspectPark.esp
254 FE 147 OCsLakeQ.esp
254 FE 148 PRP_IC.esp
254 FE 149 OCsCochituate.esp
254 FE 14a OCsCharlesviewAmpitheater.esp
254 FE 14b PRP-SS2.esp
254 FE 14c the library_Patch.esp
254 FE 14d The House_Patch.esp
254 FE 14e 3DNPC_FO4_Patch.esp
254 FE 14f OCsV81TradeCamp.esp
254 FE 150 DiamondCity-PreVis.esp
254 FE 151 Em_Vault4_Previs.esp
254 FE 152 Em_3DNPC_FO4_Previs.esp
254 FE 153 0_Vault120_NordhagenHaven_PRP.esp
254 FE 154 DiamondNewVendors_Patch.esp
254 FE 155 OCsV81TradeCampGrassReduced.esp
254 FE 156 OCsCochituateReducedGrass.esp
254 FE 157 OCsProspectParkEBA.esp
254 FE 158 OCsBreakheartBanksSS2QuestPatch.esp
254 FE 159 CharlesviewHappyCult.esp
254 FE 15a OCsV81TradeCampEarlyUnlock.esp
254 FE 15b OCsNukaTransitCenter.esp
223 df EnhancedLightsandFX.esp
254 FE 15c EnhancedLightsandFX - Automatron.esp
254 FE 15d PRP-ELFXOPC.esp
254 FE 15e ELFX-PreVis.esp
254 FE 15f ELFX-eXoPatch.esp
254 FE 160 ELFX Crash fix.esp
254 FE 161 WorkshopFramework_ScriptOverride.esp

submitted by TheMetalGodX to Fallout4Mods [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 06:53 CommonGrowth1168 Am i getting an appropriate insurance based on my life situation?

Just a brief info of myself, I am 36, Male, Married, with 1 toddler, may history ang family ko (father side) ng mild stroke. My current income is around 35k only, 8-10k monthly goes to savings para sa anak ko, the rest is for bills and living expenses, As in sakto lang. Now for the insurance info, meron akong 2 insurance na kinuha:
1) BPLAC (BPI-Philam) na binabayaran P1250 monthly since 2021 (every 5 years nataas ang premium) with 1M face value.. Critical Life Saver sya and the benefits are the following:
a) Early Stage Critical Illness Benefit (25% ng face amount ang pwde mong makuha kapag nsa early stage pa lang yung critical illness) b) End Stage Criticlal Illness Benefit (75% ng face amount ang pwde mong makuha kapag nsa end stage condition ka na) c) Medical Treatment (up to 10% of face amount, if you plan to treat the illness) d) Special Compassionate Benefit (5% face amount if mamatay yung policy holder)
2) Singlife Insurance (Cash Income Loss) with P1250 monthly rin started this year with 3M face value. Benefits are the following:
Disability/Death - 100% of face value but in terms of monthly cash benefit (50k/mo) for 5 years and additional 200k at the last payment of cash benefit.
Expanded Accident - 50% of face value, on happens if you got disabled on high risk sport activities, pilot, paid driver, works in a commercial vehicle, acts of terrorism, and during nucleabiological/chemical warfare.
Tingin nyo po enough na? Or do you have any suggestion na ibang insurance with greater benefits with the same/lower premium? Thanks. Any input will be much appreciated.
submitted by CommonGrowth1168 to phinsurance [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 06:52 Volunder_22 How I code 10x faster with Claude

https://reddit.com/link/1cw7h43/video/zcomf098ii1d1/player
Since ChatGPT came out about a year ago the way I code, but also my productivity and code output has changed drastically. I write a lot more prompts than lines of code themselves and the amount of progress I’m able to make by the end of the end of the day is magnitudes higher. I truly believe that anyone not using these tools to code is a lot less efficient and will fall behind.
A little bit o context: I’m a full stack developer. Code mostly in React and flaks in the backend.
My AI tools stack:
Claude Opus (Claude Chat interface/ sometimes use it through the api when I hit the daily limit)
In my experience and for the type of coding I do, Claude Opus has always performed better than ChatGPT for me. The difference is significant (not drastic, but definitely significant if you’re coding a lot).
GitHub Copilot
For 98% of my code generation and debugging I’m using Claude, but I still find it worth it to have Copilot for the autocompletions when making small changes inside a file for example where a writing a Claude prompt just for that would be overkilled.
I don’t use any of the hyped up vsCode extensions or special ai code editors that generate code inside the code editor’s files. The reason is simple. The majority of times I prompt an LLM for a code snippet, I won’t get the exact output I want on the first try. It of takes more than one prompt to get what I’m looking for. For the follow up piece of code that I need to get, having the context of the previous conversation is key. So a complete chat interface with message history is so much more useful than being able to generate code inside of the file. I’ve tried many of these ai coding extensions for vsCode and the Cursor code editor and none of them have been very useful. I always go back to the separate chat interface ChatGPT/Claude have.
Prompt engineering
Vague instructions will product vague output from the llm. The simplest and most efficient way to get the piece of code you’re looking for is to provide a similar example (for example, a react component that’s already in the style/format you want).
There will be prompts that you’ll use repeatedly. For example, the one I use the most:
Respond with code only in CODE SNIPPET format, no explanations
Most of the times when generating code on the fly you don’t need all those lengthy explanations the llm provides before/after the code snippets. Without extra text explanation the response is generated faster and you save time.
Other ones I use:
Just provide the parts that need to be modified
Provide entire updated component
I’ve the prompts/mini instructions I use saved the most in a custom chrome extension so I can insert them with keyboard shortcuts ( / + a letter). I also added custom keyboard shortcuts to the Claude user interface for creating new chat, new chat in new window, etc etc.
Some of the changes might sound small but when you’re coding every they, they stack up and save you so much time. Would love to hear what everyone else has been implementing to take llm coding efficiency to another level.
submitted by Volunder_22 to ClaudeAI [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 06:46 jj23dog WIBTA if I ask my Brother to Bring his cat Back?

I’m open to YWBTA and NTA responses, I genuinely need help gauging this.
My (f20) brother (m28) and his fiancée (f30) found her along the road about 5 years ago as a kitten. Neither of them had their own place and both lived with their parents, so Snowy lived in my family’s (parents and siblings) home. Brother’s fiancée couldn’t keep a cat in her home bc of her parents.
The second she came into our house, I loved her. She slept with me every night, and would lay with me when I take naps. She would bite pencils as I wrote with them doing homework or cuddled with me, followed me around the house everywhere, and waited outside the bathroom door for me. Snowy would meow at the door if she wanted me to let her out and I would meow back (duh!), and my mom has pointed out how she doesn’t do that with other people. Every day I got home from school or work, she’d run to the door and wait for me to walk in. She memorized the sound of my car or the general time I arrived home, bc she didn’t wait for anyone else like that. I have a pink stuffed animal monkey from 2nd grade that she likes to drag around and pounce on, that traveled with her to my brother’s new house.
When I was going through really rough bouts of depression, feeling like living wasn’t worth it, and constantly at odds with my parents, Snowy was there. Some weekends I’d lay in bed all day and then sleep for 12 hours, and she’d be with me the whole time. If I was crying, she’d rub her head against my face, or she’d walk into my room if she wasn’t already there. I’d paint and draw through the night, and she’d keep me company. When I played the piano, she’d lay in her cat bed beside it and listen until I was done. I always crave innocent affection, especially laying alone at night, and Snowy being there to cuddle helped me more than words can even say. She is the singular reason that I made it through the worst years of my life. She is my best friend.
I took care of trimming her claws (indoor cat, only outside with a person), bathing her, brushing her, and cleaning up her eyes or nose when she was sick. I took her outside every day. He took care of the vet bills to get her fixed, dewormed, and all the shots when they first found her. We both shared the responsibility of doing the litter box and feeding/watering the cats. We do have 2 other cats, however one is mainly outside and the other doesn’t like being held or cuddled or walked towards by people. His fiancée didn’t spend much time with Snowy when she was at our house, and my brother didn’t spend as much time with her either.
That being said, Snowy is technically my brother and his fiancée’s cat. They asked me to visit the new house yesterday night because Snowy had just been moved that morning and was scared. The second she heard my voice, she ran out from under the bed and meowed until I picked her up. She was all over me when I sat down on the couch with her, and even ate and peed in the litter box for the first time since being there. She seemed more comfortable with being in the living room and basement (litter box and food) than when I got there, which is something they commented on. They also said I can visit her whenever, however our work schedules only allow for the weekends.
My father won’t let me get a new cat unless we get rid of the cat that doesn’t like people. For one, I’m not rehoming a rescue cat that’s been here for 6 years to get a new cat. For another, she’s traumatized from being abused as a kitten, and there’s absolutely no way I am putting her through the torture of meeting new people and living in a new home. F that.
I know they have technical ownership over Snowy and they love her, but my bond with this cat is making it hard to let go. My bed feels empty without her, and I keep seeing the other cats out of the corner of my eye and for a split second say “Snowy!” in my head. But it’s not Snowy. I genuinely feel depressed without her here.
Would I be the asshole if I asked them to bring her back?
submitted by jj23dog to AITAH [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 06:27 Original_Exercise968 How to Identify the Perfect Signage for Your Business?

Choosing the right signage should be a top priority for any business, whether you are just starting out or you are a well-established company. Your signage works for you 24/7, telling customers who you are, where you are, and what you do.
Effective business signage should be key components to your marketing strategy to help you promote your products and services. Here are some steps to follow when choosing your signage.
STEP 1: DETERMINE YOUR BUDGET
Your budget will help you determine a number of things when you are choosing signage such as:
When you are setting your budget, keep in mind how cost-effective signage is. It is one of the few types of advertising that, once it is paid for and installed, it keeps working for you without any additional costs except the occasional maintenance tasks.
Also remember that if you invest a little more in a higher quality sign, it will last longer and will not have to be replaced as quickly which will save you money in the long run.
If your budget is tight, then you can invest in a good quality storefront sign first and then add extra signage as the funds become available.
STEP 2: CHOOSE THE RIGHT SIGNAGE COMPANY TO WORK WITH
There are many companies that do custom business signs, so how can you know which one is the best choice for you. Here are some tips to follow:
Choose a full-service company: It's better to work with a company that can design, manufacture, install, and maintain your signage for you. A full-service company will work with you form the start to the completion of your signage.
They will know what you want because they helped you design it, they will make it to your exact specifications, and they will know how to best install and maintain it, because they made it.
Choose a local company: Working with a local company has great benefits as well. They will be familiar with any signage bylaws in your area so you can be sure that your signs will be built according to those guidelines and they will know what permits or other paperwork is required and will help you obtain those.
If anything goes wrong, it's easier to contact a local company than one that is located far away.
Choose a company with experience and a good reputation: You want to find a company that has lots of experience in the signage industry and that has made the type of signage that you want for your business.
Check out the past projects that they have done and check out their online reviews to see what their customers think about their work.
STEP 3: CHOOSE THE RIGHT DESIGN FOR YOUR SIGNAGE
Now that you know how much you can spend and what company you want to work with, it's time to design your signage. Here are some things to consider when choosing your design.
Think about your demographic: If you are targeting a certain type of customer, then you will want to have signage that will appeal to them.
For example, if your demographic is a younger audience, then choose fun and lively colours, fonts, images, and a message that will appeal to that generation. If your demographic is a more traditional then you probably want to choose more traditional colours, images, fonts and messages.
Tell your signage company what demographic you are targeting and they can help you design the right type of signage for that market.
Make sure your signage is visible: Your signage can be an effective advertising tool, but only if it can be seen. Make sure that your sign is large enough to be seen from the distance that you want and that the fonts are easy to read with lettering big enough and properly spaced apart.
If you are in a dark corner or if you want customers to see your signage at night, then you should choose backlit or another type of illumination for your sign.
The colours that you choose also play an important part in making your signage more visible. You want to choose colours with high contrast in both hue and value. If you use high contrasting colours then then can be seen from greater distances than low contrasting colours.
According to the Outdoor Advertising Association of America, "research demonstrates that high colour contrast can improve outdoor advertising recall by 38 percent." Black on yellow and black on white are two very high contrasting colour combinations whereas red on yellow and white on red have a very low contrast.
Choose the right materials: Your signage company can help you choose the right types of materials to use in your sign. Let them know how long you want your sign to last and where it will be put up as this will help determine the best type of materials to use. Some options include:
Keep it simple: When it comes to signage, less is usually more. You want to avoid too much clutter in your design and make sure that you include lots of white space. White space simply refers to the empty space around your text and graphics. this empty space can be a colour, it doesn't have to be white.
If your text is too crowded and too long, it will be more difficult to read especially by passing motorists. It is a good idea to leave about 30 to 40 percent of your signage space blank.
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submitted by Original_Exercise968 to u/Original_Exercise968 [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 06:23 Hotpot-creations Short story - Romance: Love Across Time

Short story - Romance: Love Across Time
Image by Hotpot.ai
Love Across Time Story and image by Hotpot AI
Gina Hansen sat at her desk, staring at the letter in her hands. It was unlike any letter she had ever received before. The paper was old and yellowed, the handwriting elegant and precise. But what caught her attention the most was the postmark—it was from the year 2050.
She had always been fascinated by time travel, but she never thought it would become a reality. And now, here she was, holding a letter from someone claiming to be her soulmate from the future.
Her heart raced as she tore open the envelope and unfolded the letter. As she read the words, her breath caught in her throat.
"My dearest Gina,
I know this may seem impossible, but I am writing to you from the year 2050. I am your soulmate, and I have been searching for you for what feels like a lifetime. I cannot reveal my identity, for fear of disrupting the space-time continuum, but I assure you, I know you intimately.
I have been watching you from afar, and I know your deepest desires and fears. I know that you have always dreamed of finding true love, and I am here to tell you that it exists. But in order for us to be together, you must follow the clues I have left for you.
First, you must go to the park where we will meet for the first time. Look for the bench with the inscription "G + T forever"—our initials and a promise of eternity. There, you will find the next clue.
I know this may seem like a wild and unbelievable story, but I beg you to trust me. Our love is worth it.
Yours always,
Your future soulmate"
Gina's mind was reeling. Could this really be true? Was she about to embark on a journey to find her true love from the future? She couldn't deny the flutter of excitement in her chest as she thought about the possibilities.
Without hesitation, she grabbed her coat and headed to the park. As she walked, she couldn't help but wonder who this mysterious person could be. Would she recognize them? Would they recognize her?
When she arrived at the park, she scanned the benches until her eyes landed on the one with the inscription. Her heart skipped a beat as she approached it, and there, tucked under the bench, was a small envelope.
She opened it eagerly and found a picture of a man with piercing blue eyes and a warm smile. On the back, there was a note that read, "This is me. Come find me."
Gina's heart raced as she looked around, trying to spot the man in the picture. And then, she saw him. He was sitting on a bench across the park, looking at her with the same intensity she saw in the picture.
She couldn't explain it, but she felt drawn to him. Without a second thought, she made her way to him, her heart pounding in her chest.
"Hi," she said, her voice barely above a whisper.
"Hi," he replied, a smile spreading across his face. "My name is Tom."
And just like that, they fell into an easy conversation, as if they had known each other for years. Tom told her about his life in the future, and Gina couldn't help but be captivated by his stories. He was intelligent, charming, and everything she had ever dreamed of in a partner.
As the sun began to set, Tom stood up and offered her his hand. "I have one more clue for you," he said, his eyes sparkling. "But first, I want to take you on a journey."
He led her to a nearby field, where a small spaceship was waiting for them. Gina's eyes widened in amazement as Tom helped her inside and strapped her in.
"This is incredible," she said, her heart racing with excitement.
"I'm glad you think so," Tom replied, his hand brushing against hers. "Because this is just the beginning."
The spaceship took off, and they soared through the sky, visiting different planets and galaxies. As they traveled, Tom told her about the advancements in technology and the amazing things he had seen in his time.
But what fascinated Gina the most was Tom himself. She couldn't believe that this incredible man was her soulmate, and she couldn't help but fall for him more with each passing moment.
As the night sky turned into dawn, they landed back on Earth, and Tom led her to a secluded spot in the woods. There, he handed her a small box and said, "This is the final clue. Open it when you're ready."
Gina opened the box to find a beautiful necklace with a pendant in the shape of a heart. She looked up at Tom, and he smiled, his eyes filled with love.
"It's a time-traveling device," he said. "With it, you can come visit me in the future whenever you want."
Tears filled Gina's eyes as she realized the depth of Tom's love for her. She put on the necklace, and they shared a passionate kiss under the stars.
From that day on, Gina and Tom's love only grew stronger. They would meet in different times and places, always finding new adventures to embark on together.
And as they stood on a cliff overlooking the ocean, with the sun setting behind them, Gina knew that she had found her true soulmate—a man from the future who had captured her heart and showed her that love knows no boundaries of time or space.
submitted by Hotpot-creations to HotpotAI [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 06:05 Tattoo_Cat Do I have good enough reason to feel cheated by my boyfriends family?

My boyfriend and I have been together 2 years and have decided we are ready to have a baby together. This might seem early in the relationship, however, I have been with my fair share of bad boyfriends and I know this one is the one and we will make good parents together. We actually really wanted to have a baby together within the first year however we decided to be responsible as we weren’t living together, didn’t have much money saved and just knew it wasn’t the right time. We are now both 25, we have a house together, have enough savings and feel it is absolutely the right time. We have worked hard to get to this place and are very excited for the next step. Not only are we excited to actually start a family but I have always dreamed about telling my family and how excited they will be. I was also extremely excited to tell my boyfriends family as he is the oldest and our baby would make his parents grandparents for the first time. When I first met my boyfriends Dad, he asked when the grandkids were coming, telling us he couldn’t wait to be a grandpa. He also got out his phone and showed us a video of a gender reveal involving a truck blowing the coloured smoke out of the pipes and told us this is what we would do when we had a gender reveal one day (he is a very proud truck driver from a long line of truck drivers). My boyfriend and I laughed and said that was cool and we will do it one day. Every time we rang my boyfriends Dad as he lives 5 hours away, he would always ask when his grandchildren are coming.
Fast forward a year. My boyfriend and I were still trying to conceive with no luck yet, we knew it wouldn’t happen over night. However, one night we receive a facetime phone call from my boyfriends Dad. He is sitting beside my boyfriends younger brother, we’ll call him Tom, who is 22 and says ‘guess what’. Tom then holds up a new born onesie and says ‘we’re having a baby’.
My heart sinks. And this is where all of my ugly, angry, sad emotions begin. I would also just like to disclose before I go on, that I KNOW I should not feel this way, but it’s just the way I do feel.
My boyfriends younger brother Tom has been with his girlfriend for 4 months, we’ll call her Sarah. She has an 18month old baby with someone else and doesn’t work to take care of this child. Tom lives next door to his Dad and step mom in a rental with 2x of his step brothers, absolute bachelor pad. They all work in the truck yard down the road and smoke bongs in the shed every night. Sarah moved in to the house with her child as soon as she met Tom and sure enough now she is pregnant with his child. Tom is always broke, asking my boyfriend for money all the time. He is constantly caught short for rent, which isn’t even that much considering it is split 3 ways. Tom drives a two door v8 Ute which is his pride and joy, which he will now have to sell to get a family friendly car.
My boyfriend is happy for his brother, yet I feel crushed. I want to feel happy for them.
A few months later, my boyfriend and I took some time off work to visit his dads side of the family (his parents are split). We drove 5 hours to come and stay with them as my boyfriend doesn’t see them very often. Whilst we were up there we met Sarah for the first time and her child from her previous relationship. Sarah, Tom and the child had moved into a slightly bigger ‘bar’ room out the back of the bachelor house and it was absolutely trashed. They are sleeping on a mattress with no sheets, there is clothes, toys, empty food containers, dishes, rubbish covering the floor and surfaces. Tom simply remarked ‘when you have kids, you’ll understand’. I get that, having kids is hard and messy but this was beyond that, and, Sarah doesn’t work she is home all day every day. My boyfriend commented that Tom use to be a neat freak which I found hard to believe.
Whilst we were up there it seemed all everyone could talk about is this baby. Sarah was also constantly leaving her other child with various of Tom’s family members and just going to bed. My boyfriend and Tom’s stepmum quietly said to me that she is constantly left with the child whose nappy is always full. I spent some time with Sarah who mentioned to me that she happened to fall pregnant and asked Tom if he wanted to keep it or if she should abort it. My boyfriend and I had argued over whether we thought it was a planned baby or not, my boyfriend insisting it was planned. Obviously not.
Sarah also began discussing with us that she and Tom were going to do a gender reveal. She then explained that they were going to do the same truck idea that my boyfriends Dad had showed us. I made an excuse to leave the room and I burst into tears. This made me feel like his Dad didn’t actually care if my boyfriend and I had a baby, he just wanted a grandchild no matter where it came from, and Tom did it first. Whilst we were staying with my boyfriends Dad, we also saw so many fights unfold in front of us between Tom and Sarah. Yes couples fight but they were screaming at each other, in front of the 18 month old and getting in each others faces. A very healthy thing for a couple about to be a family of 4. Not long after this trip, Tom and Sarah announced the pregnancy on Facebook and all of my boyfriends family commented on there how excited they were and how Tom is a ‘clever’ boy as there will be 5 generations since Tom and my boyfriends great grandparents are still alive. I again tried to feel happy for them but this was stifled by my feeling of anger. Since day one of meeting my boyfriend I had always put in a HUGE effort to not only meet my boyfriends family but we travelled immensely to meet all sides of family as he has family all over the place. His mum and her partner live away and we often spent lots of weekends with them which was not easy at all as his mum is addicted to hard drugs and my boyfriend is the only family member that still speaks to her. We also travelled 4 hours multiple times to stay with his grand father and visit cousins. We travelled 3 hours on Christmas Eve to spend Christmas with his cousins family and recently we travelled another 6 hour round trip to spend the day with his Nanna who is sick. Family is very important to me and also my boyfriend so I always made a huge effort to visit them with him. This is what has bothered me almost the most, my boyfriend and I have made such an effort with his family, yet, all they can talk about is Tom and Sarah having a baby. Tom and Sarah have not made nearly as much effort as us to meet any family, Sarah has met Tom’s dad and brother (my boyfriend) and that’s it. Everytime my boyfriend speaks to one of his relatives it’s always ‘isn’t it so exciting, not long now’.
A few months after this, my boyfriend and I had a triumph - we were pregnant! Followed by heart ache, an early miscarriage.
I spoke to my family who were extremely supportive and my boyfriend told his who were supportive at the time but just told us to ‘keep trying’. No one has spoken about it since, which is okay, but, I am not okay. Whilst I was feeling so hurt and upset before, it is now millions times worse. I have had good days, and bad days. One of my worst days was recently when Sarah invited us to her baby shower. My boyfriend came home from work and said ‘we’ll have to book some time off work since it’s on the Saturday and we have to travel’. We then got into an argument as I was so hurt that he just assumed I was okay to go to it. After a few days of thought I realised how important it was to my boyfriend and I had to push my feelings aside. I’m still so frustrated though because aside from all of my pain, I KNOW they would not travel 5 hours and take time off work to go to our baby shower if we had one.
So the baby shower is in 2 weeks and I’m still having the same ugly, angry, sad, disgusting thoughts swirling around my head.
Why do they get to have a baby within 4 monts of knowing each other, completely unprepared, no money, no vehicle, no house, no nothing? They didn’t plan this, she just let herself get pregnant or they were so careless not to use protection. My boyfriend and I could’ve gotten pregnant within the first months of dating but we’re not that stupid and irresponsible. My boyfriends stepbrother has moved out of the house and is living in a shed so that Sarah and Tom have more room to have a baby which I think is so completely unfair. And now the other stepbrother that lives there will have an 18month old and a new born in his house which he never signed up for. Tom and Sarah have just gotten pregnant and not thought about anyone else or how this effects anyone else. My boyfriend and I have worked long, hard hours to save for our dream and yet we’re here watching it unfold for someone else whilst we deal with the heart ache of getting so close and losing it. I work in disability which is extremely mentally draining and my boyfriend is a diesel mechanic which is physical and hard. Sarah doesn’t work, yes she takes care of her child yet they’re living in filth and she manages to palm him off most of the time anyway. Tom is a casual at his work and spends most of his pay check on weed and smokes every night. Yet, the entire family thinks they are so incredible and wow! They’re having a baby! I feel so cheated, I feel like it should be us, and I know that’s so incredibly selfish but we couldn’t have planned this more if we tried yet they simply didn’t use protection and get to live out our dream.
I’m wondering how on earth I am going to manage to get through this damn baby shower and I would love to know peoples thoughts on this, but please, be kind 😭
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2024.05.20 06:01 Choice_Evidence1983 My husband kicked me out of the home because I invited over his mother

I am NOT OOP, OOP posted from 2 accounts: u/Actual-Beach-4400 + u/Affectionate_Egg895
Originally posted to Marriage
My husband kicked me out of the home because I invited over his mother
Trigger Warnings: sexual abuse of a child, trauma, miscarriage
Original Post (AutoMod): March 30, 2024
I preface this by saying I think I screwed up massively.
Hubbie and I have been married for six years now. He's always been the "fun guy", always laughing and making me laugh, always seeing the bright side of things. However, one thing that bothered me was that I never knew much of his family. His father died when he was little and he has little relationship with his mom.
I'll keep this short: four months ago I looked up his mom on social media and found her. I sent a message, and she replied. We chatted and met up, she doesn't live far from us. She knew all about me and her son because she kept an eye on him on social. We became friends and I filled her in with details about our lives. I asked her why hubbie went no contact with her. She refused to tell me why if hubbie didn't tell me, just said it was all her fault and she's ashamed of it. I proposed to try what I could to help them reconcile and she agreed even if she was reluctant at first.
In the following weeks I tried talking to hubbie about his mother and what happened between them. He always changed topic or shut me down. When MIL asked me how it was going, I told her things were progressing and I was working on it.
Last week I decided to try and have them meet up so maybe we could spend Easter together. I invited MIL over before my husband would be back from work so we could surprise. She was a bit unsure about this, she said she wasn't comfortable surprising him like that, but I ressured her. I thought that any emotion hubbie could have would be better cooled by a hug.
Spoiler alert, MIL was right. Hubbie came home, and after the initial shock started yelling like I never heard him to her to get out immediately. She just grabbed her coat and stormed out. Afterwards, hubbie told me to get out too when I explained what I had done. He didn't yell at me, but his voice was cold and almost emotionless.
I've been staying at my sister's since. Hubbie won't take my calls. MIL cried on the phone and asked why I lied like that and never talked to my hubbie and "prepared" him for that. Now she stopped taking my calls as well.
I know I have screwed up big time, and I see now what a massive dork I've been. How can I fix this? I want to apologize to hubbie for what I did and maybe find out why his mom is dead to him.
Comments
Commenter: You’re a manipulative liar with no concept of boundaries. You’re staring divorce in the face and STILL want details on a situation that has absolutely fuck all to do with you. You know you’re a despicable person when even the estranged mother wants nothing to do with you. Grow up.
MollyRolls:You transgressed on such a massive and personal level and you still think you might be entitled to “find out why”? OP, this is not your trauma. Your husband is an autonomous adult who is allowed to set his own boundaries, and if you couldn’t trust his ability to make good decisions in that regard you should not have married him. Instead you meddled and undermined and completely violated his trust—he trusted that you would act like a partner, not an overbearing matchmaker who didn’t believe him about his own lived experience.
You don’t have to know what happened. It is not your place to judge whether it was “bad enough.” It does not matter if you ever understand. All you ever had to do was trust him, and you demonstrated you have no interest in being that sort of spouse, and so it serves you right if you lost him.
sk1999sk ask your husband to go to marriage counseling. You betrayed him big time. He may never be able to forgive you. You also need individual therapy to find out why you would do something like this to someone you supposedly love. if your husband refuses marriage counseling and ends your marriage, please see a therapist on you your own.
 
Editor’s Note: removed the bottom part of the update as it had the rehash of the original post
Update 1: April 20, 2024
Hey guys My original post and account got nuked, and I can't find them anymore. If someone can find my original post I'll add It in an edit.
The last weeks have been rough, but we might be okay.
Hubbie opened up about the reason he cut off his mother and many of you were right, it was s3xual abuse. Not from his mother, but his stepfather. They were engaged and his mom was pregnant with his child when the guy started giving my husband "attentions".
Husband went to his mom but she shut him down accusing him of being jealous and wanting to spoil her happiness. This went on until his mother came home from work unexpectedly and walked in on the guy "giving attention" to my husband. She kicked him out, pressed charges and annulled their engagement, but the damage was done and my husband no longer trusted her. She also lost the baby due to stress and although she never blamed my husband for it, he felt it was his fault.
All this felt like a gut punch for me, first for what he went through, and then because now I am the person who shattered his trust. He said he did consider divorce over this, but pretty bluntly said that he thinks my actions were out of stupidity rather than malice, and he wants to work things out.
I am committed to do my best to become a better and safe partner for him, I know I have this stupid and selfish tendency to think that I often know better than him, but I have to get over it because it hurt him massively and almost imploded our relationship. I don't want to be another person he trusted and ended up hurting him.
He also decided to reach out to his mom and start talking to her again. He's not sure they can repair the relationship, but he wants for both of them to find some closure.
Comments
laurcarol: There is zero reason for him to repair the relationship with his mom . I hope he gets the closure he deserves. I happen to remember your original post, and I still don’t know if you fully grasp what you did wrong.
Kebar8: Just so you know this is not something that will be fixed in the next few weeks or months.
This is going to take years for you to regain his full trust and love again
I hope you've put yourself in therapy to work out why you put yourself first here and not his wishes
Dry-Hearing5266: You need to put yourself in therapy.
Your level of boundary stomping and dismissing your husband's feelings along with your admission that you often "think that I often know better than him" shows you have issues that you need to address in individual therapy
You need to understand that you don't deserve his consideration no matter the reason for his estrangement with his mother. Whether you think it's justified or not.
You seem to have some narcissistic tendencies, and you need to get that addressed. A mentally healthy person would never do this.
 
Update 2: May 13, 2024
Hello everyone.
You can find the rest of the story on my previous post.
My husband is doing better and our relationship is slowly getting back to what it was. I know it will take a lot of time to repair the damage I caused, but I am willing to give him all the time he wants and do anything he asks out of me.
The bitter irony of this whole story is that he told me he had been thinking about reaching out to his mother, but on his terms and time. By going behind his back I almost destroyed that chance of reconciliation and imploded our marriage.
I am working on myself and will start seeing a therapist next month so I never do something like that ever again and more importantly, never betray his trust ever again.
Also, with my husband's knowledge and consent, I apologized to MIL for leading her on with false promises and she has forgiven me.
As for him and MIL, they started talking to each other, have met a couple of times in public and yesterday my husband invited her over for dinner so that in his words we all can try to start over properly.
She's a very sweet woman and she's eager to reconcile with him and get to know me. My husband said that for now he wants for all of us to get a bit used to each other, then he and MIL will get to work on their traumas (his words).
He says she's not the "villain" in what happened, but he needs to come to terms with her poor decisions and his own feelings of guilt for her losing her baby. MIL on the other hand is very apologetic and extremely sorry about what happened (in my husband's opinion, sincerely so) and doesn't blame him at all for the miscarriage.
As for me, I just sit aside and do my best to rebuild the trust with my husband and become a better and safe partner.
He started being affectionate with me again and we are no longer on thin ice, but I can't stop thinking I almost lost him because I thought I knew better than him.
Comment
Veronika9216: I remember your story, and I hope you appreciate how lucky you are to be given a second chance.
You know you screwed up when both your husband and the estranged parent are upset at you for what you have done. It seems you all are on the road of reconciling, but never forget that your short-sighted actions could have nuked any possibility of them reconciling and your own marriage.
Be thankful you are given this chance, don't screw it up and although your husband and MIL have forgiven you for breaking both their trusts, it will take time to rebuild their trust for you.
 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

submitted by Choice_Evidence1983 to BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 05:55 zeven7659 Protestantism conversion to Catholic?

DISCLAIMER: I am new to this. I am not trying to incite violence between secular groups of Christianity. I am simply seeking advice and help from others who have learned in their walk with God. I am curious and want to learn. I have a lot of questions and only want people to reply who have good intentions to help me understand than to talk down on my faith. This is going to be a long post. I thank you in advance for your patience.
So I’ve recently found my way back to God in a way I never have before. I reached an incredibly low point of my life and He was there when nothing else was. While I grew up protestant and going to church I fell out for a long time. I never really read scripture outside of Sunday school when my family would go, and my brother is a non believer entirely now. I struggled with doubt and fell in and out with my faith repeatedly as my life grew more complex. My father died violently and young a few years ago but he was a believer and I questioned how could my God let this happen. I devoted my life to science and medicine and lost sight of my faith in that in combination with all of this. Yet now, I realized my actions had grown so sinful I needed to make a change and I decided to seek God. Now, for the first time in my life I’m reading my Bible, truly, chronologically. My fiancée is supportive of me and the relationship I’m trying to build with Him but I need some guidance.
I’m towards the end of the Books of Moses but I’ve come to a few conclusions I never have before and not all of them are altogether comforting. The Bible teaches us that Jesus is all powerful, loving, and forgiving. Yet what they don’t teach on Sundays that God, in by that, He (Jesus) is also terrifying. He names himself Jealous in Exodus. He is wrathful. He kills for disobedience and I know I have certainly broken more than one of his over 600 laws in the Old Testament. I’ve repented before the Lord, I’ve changed my life, changed my habits and while I struggle to stick to that change I try each and every day and have decided to put forth an effort to build my relationship with God. But I’m still plagued with questions now more than ever, yet now they’re in a sense of I want to understand rather than doubt.
Am I to follow Jesus or know my God? I pray to God in the name of the Son, but who is my relationship with the Son or the Father? Which is God if not both in combination with the Holy Spirit? When I pray which aspect am I praying to? Jesus taught us to pray to our Heavenly Father in his name but I’ve always called myself a follower of Christ. Yet now in my reading I feel as though my relationship should be directed to the Father though I know I can only know him through the Son? I want to have a stronger relationship with Him, but I feel as though I’m failing through sheer ignorance. I want to be hungry for His word, but I feel lesser that I’m almost burnt out or feeling desperate from the OT. I try to pray but I don’t think I’m very good at it and never know what to say aside from the Lord’s Prayer.
But now with all of this I’m learning that the Catholic Church is the church left behind in Jesus’ wake so should I not be a Catholic if I’m truly to follow Scripture to the letter? But the Bible also doesn’t mention intercession with reverence to saints? I thought I was only ever to pray to God and anything else was heresy? Or for another example, if I repent to the Lord why should I need to go to confession to do so? Catholicism teaches to have a relationship with Mary but shouldn’t that be reserved for Jesus Christ? My heart tells me I should be a Catholic based on what I’ve read but so many practices seem contradictory to how I was raised im not sure anymore.
I understand at the end of the day that my faith is to trust and believe that Jesus Christ is my lord and savior, that through him and him alone is the way the truth and the life and that without him I am nothing. But I guess my question is how do I know which denomination to pick? There are many contemporary practices of some Protestant churches that seem to contradict the Bible in some ways but there are also Catholic teachings that seem foreign or strange to me. Purgatory? Saint worship seems almost like pseudo idolatry? The pope being infallible and a line to the disciples ? I’m confused and right now altogether frightened by the God I am coming to know in my study and want to do my best to Follow his word but don’t know how best to do so.
I just want to do the right thing and feel as though these questions are best suited for a Priest but I’m Not sure how to have that conversation with one or how to even set up a time to discuss all of this.
Thank you for taking the time to read all of this, for your patience with me and my questions, your sincerity, and your input.
May God bless you.
submitted by zeven7659 to TrueChristian [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 05:44 Steffy_Cookies I managed to write part of the lore of my world, its 14 pages and I'm only like 50% done 😔

Evergreen, a rather welcoming name. Perfect for a land full of calm, peace and beauty. Evergreen in this case is the name of a vast kingdom. This kingdom is an incredibly complicated but majestic land and its people as well. Now sit back, relax and enjoy as I tell you about Evergreen.
First of all, where did Evergreen come from? Well the most early evidence of anyone living here was over 8000 years ago though if you truly think about it it could be as far back as 50 000 years. You see, the oldest trace of civilization in the kingdom is a large ancient hotel in the center of Heatherlea. No other building outdated this and that record is still held up to this day. The actual date of foundation of the kingdom is completely unknown and absolutely no one can tell when it could ever be because of the incredibly vague amount of information on anything before the recorded history of Evergreen. Though not everyone is so clueless, one person may know the answer on the timeline and that is The One Hundred.
You may be asking who this One Hundred person is. He is the oldest person in Evergreen and supposedly some sort of God. Very little is known about him but all that is known is whoever this person is, they are the most powerful in the kingdom.
Now I think you’ve heard enough about the kingdom itself and the basics on it now why don’t we get to work on actually unraveling this massive mystery. But with so many things to explain, how can this ever have an order? Well that’s very easy to do, this is a catalog of everything to know on the topic of Evergreen. Let’s begin.
Cities of Evergreen
Evergreen is the main city of the kingdom, it is used as a capital as well as the largest megalopolis of the city. Though in Scriptorium, the language of Evergreen, they don’t have terms for city, megalopolis or metropolis. So to them everything is a settlement, village or town. In this kingdom the size of a village does not matter only its population and Evergreen having over 1 000 000 people living in it, it’s considered the largest village in the kingdom. Which is quite a fitting label for the capital of such a large kingdom. Though not only Heatherlea contains an important building. Evergreen has the Main Hall and Steffy’s Mansion, both constructions are very important because they contain Aletine. Aletine is a rare gem that will be explained later on but for now all you need to know on Aletine is that it is very rare and very precious. The buildings each have an arch constructed fully of this material.
The whispers of Evergreen
Not everyone in Evergreen is happy with what they know about the kingdom. Certain things are very secretive and though on the outside it seems like a perfect place it is shrouded in mystery and entangled in a web of unknown like a huge tapestry of mystery. The people of the villages are mostly happy with how everything is going except for one thing. They want to know more about the village’s origin. You see, Steffy, The One Hundred, Heathotel and Aletinian do not want too much information to escape into the public’s hands. A disquiet hums beneath the seemingly idyllic surface of Evergreen. Whispers flit through bustling marketplaces, hinting at an enigmatic past shrouded in secrecy. Kept under lock and key by Steffy and the other main powers of Evergreen, the population never ceases to speculate what they could be hiding. Is it a secret civilization before us? Or could it be that Aletine is the secret to the lost time? No matter what the citizens say not one word has been spoken by anyone in control. And there is a good reason behind all of that which will be explained later on.
Architecture and style of Evergreen and it’s settlements
A warped image of Evergreen is fabricated when you dig deeper than what’s on the idyllic surface of Evergreen. But the kingdom is still a majestic land. Its architecture is primarily biomimicry as the villagers are very connected to their surroundings and the flora that they share the world with. The respect for nature in Evergreen is reflected everywhere, in the architecture, in the culture, celebrations and many more subtle depictions. The style that the land has adopted over the millenia is a very calming one, they believe in living life to its fullest so the architects try to make things as pleasant to live in as possible in almost every way possible. You will never find any hostile architecture in the city as its capital status means that it must show a good example for the other settlements to follow. However, the pervasive calmness of Evergreen's architecture raises questions. Could this serene aesthetic be a deliberate ploy? Is biomimicry a way to mask the secrets hidden beneath the tranquil surface? The One Hundred, with their knowledge of the lost civilization and the interdimensional threat, may have a vested interest in maintaining this facade of idyllic peace. Steffy, with his atmosphirec gem of unknown origin, might also find solace in the calming influence of these biomimicry structures. No one can know for sure but until more is learned why not enjoy centuries of perfected design and let the peacefulness wash over you as you stroll through the markets and quiet neighborhoods of the town.
The rest of the settlements
Evergreen does not have that many large towns, only about 4 main ones, Evergreen, Azalea, Heatherlea and Islafield. Those main towns are surrounded by much smaller ones but the main focus is on the four towns above.
Islafield
Islafield is, as the name suggests, mostly for farming hence the ‘field” in its name. The town is near a lake also named Isla The lake is used for fishing as well as a way to water the crops of the town. This majestic town is the main source of nourishment for the entire kingdom with 60% of its land consisting of fields and crops. The kingdom contains 5.6 million inhabitants which is a vast amount of mouths to feed and according to the way Steffy wants to run the kingdom, everyone should have the same chance with life per se he just doesn’t want anyone to starve or die before their time that is the primary reason why he allowed Islafield to become such a large producer of food. He would usually want people to get their produce from the same town in which they live in though since he has 5.6 million people to feed he made the exception that Islafield can export its harvest to the other towns. Other than the beautiful fields of flowers and crops Islafield doesn’t really hold much interest in the eye of the population of Evergreen. Though it is considered the most naturally beautiful town in the kingdom, its beauty does not help it much with population, it has been on a decline ever since the vault of Aletine became public knowledge. Perhaps the Aletinians, a secretive cult entrusted with crafting tools made of Aletine, might hold knowledge about this strange and sudden decline. Despite the dwindling population, Islafield remains a vital part of Evergreen. However, its idyllic facade now masks a layer of intrigue, begging the question: is Islafield truly just a farming town, or is it a cornerstone in a larger, undisclosed operation of the Aletinians?
Heatherlea, a town of beauty and intrigue
Heatherlea, nestled in Evergreen's north, throbs with a unique energy.This bustling town transforms into the kingdom's prime tourist destination during warmer months, welcoming an influx of 700,000 visitors. The undeniable allure? The enigmatic Ancient Hotel, an 8000-year-old structure, the oldest human-made wonder in Evergreen. However, Heatherlea's charm extends beyond the Ancient Hotel.,underneath the ancient hotel hides a vault. The most secure place in the entire kingdom. Inside of that vault is a supply of Aletine. Since Aletine is only found in that singular spot underneath the hotel a vault was built around the mine to keep everyone out of there given how precious Aletine is.Other than its main attractions, its marketplace features the kingdom's tallest stand, showcasing the rare blue and orange Heatherberry. Yet, the exclusivity of these berries in Heatherlea raises questions. Found primarily in the south, their presence here seems curiously deliberate. Is it simply a marketing ploy, or could it be part of a larger scheme? Heatherlea's vibrancy and tourist appeal are undeniable, but a disquieting question lingers: is it a genuine haven, or a meticulously crafted facade designed to distract from the secrets buried beneath the surface?
Azalea, a town shrouded in floral mystery
Azalea is known for one reason, if you look closely at its name you will notice that it contains the name of a flower. Azalea is named after the rhododendron by the same name, Azalea. This specific flower only grows in the town for unknown reasons and once again the reason for the flower's appearance in this one part of the kingdom is gatekeeped by the main powers The One Hundred, Steffy with his atmosphirec gem, and the Aletinians, each with their vested interests in the mysteries of Evergreen, all seem particularly invested in keeping the reason for the Azalea's exclusivity under wraps. Intriguingly, Azalea attracts a disproportionate number of Aletine sellers, who use the flower's beauty to showcase their wares. Why this specific town, rather than a more prominent location? Could there be a connection between the Azalea's unique properties and the Aletine gem? The motives of the sellers remain shrouded in secrecy, adding another layer to the mysteries swirling around Azalea and deepen the mystery of Evergreen.
Shadows in Evergreen: Unveiling the Kingdom's Cults
Evergreen's power structure extends beyond the readily apparent figures like Steffy and The One Hundred. Shrouded in secrecy, a network of cults weaves its influence through the kingdom. While some, like the Aletinians, maintain a relatively benign presence, crafting tools from the enigmatic Aletine, others operate with a more veiled agenda. The Heathotels, shrouded in mystery themselves, stand out for their potential hostility. Their enigmatic purpose and unknown connection to the Aletinians, an exclusive society rumored to possess knowledge on the craftsmanship of Aletine weapons, fuel speculation about their true motives. Do they cover the Aletine's power for their own gain, or are they safeguarding Evergreen from a yet-unknown threat? The secrecy surrounding these cults casts a long shadow, leaving the question unanswered: are they guardians or hidden dangers lurking within the kingdom's idyllic facade? The Heathotels: Enigmatic guardians of the ancient stone The heathotels are a mostly harmless cult. They are in charge of the protection of the Ancient Hotel and are the only ones who have full access to the vault containing all the Aletine. They seem to worship the hotel itself and treat Aletine adorned objects with the same respect as they would do to Steffy himself. They are highly secretive with the reasons on why they respect the precious stone so much and what connection they seem to have with the ancient hotel. While the other power players, like The One Hundred and Steffy himself, strive to keep the Heathotels' activities shrouded, their efforts only heighten the intrigue. This raises the question, if the Heathotels are truly a benign force, why such a concerted effort to conceal their practices? The Heathotels' enigmatic presence throws a long shadow, leaving the question unanswered: are they protectors of the Aletine and the Ancient Hotel, or are they guardians of a far deeper secret? The Aletinians: Sworn Crafters of Aletine Wonders Among Evergreen's enigmatic factions, the Aletinians occupy a distinct position. Eschewing the rigid structure of traditional cults, they follow a oath instead of a set of rules.The specifics of this oath remain a closely guarded secret, fueling endless whispers and speculation. The Aletinians, as their name suggests, possess a unique bond with Aletine. Interestingly they do not worship the Aletine but instead they treat it with reverence, viewing it less as an object and more as a potent material.The true purpose of the Aletinians is to forge everything that is created out of Aletine. They are hand picked, allegedly to safeguard the kingdom's precious Aletine supply, to ensure the safety of the kingdom’s supply of this majestic gem they can only be of a certain sanity. Once again the villagers have their own theories, whispers abound about an Aletine-infused substance used in the selection process, a method to ensure only the "worthy" wield the gem's power.Though to be granted the incredible privilege of handling Aletine directly is very prestigious as only 30 people have the privilege of handling the precious Aletine. But many things are still unclear with them as well. Why do these artisans operate outside the Ancient Hotel, traveling all the way to Azalea to practice their craft? And why, despite their seemingly benign nature, does Steffy strive to keep them hidden from the public eye? The Aletinians remain a captivating enigma, their purpose and connection to Azalea hinting at a deeper role within Evergreen's veiled secrets. The Nevergreen: Shadows Reaching for Forbidden Power In stark contrast to the Aletinians, who utilize Aletine for crafting, stands the enigmatic Nevergreen cult. Driven by a sinister agenda, they seek to weaponize the gem's power, a truth known only to Steffy and The One Hundred. Whispers abound of their attempts to breach the Aletine mine's containment, a reckless act that some speculate triggered a deadly conflict, the War Of Gods, shrouded in secrecy. Steffy himself, it seems, remains unaware of the Nevergreen's potential role in this ancient war. He and The One Hundred instead attribute it to a nebulous embodiment of darkness. The Nevergreen also strive to make the deepest secrets of Evergreen public knowledge. They are the reason why the Aletine vault became known to the villagers of Evergreen. The One Hundred and Steffy tried to cover it up by saying that the villagers deserved to know the truth of where the Aletine came from. But in reality it was an elaborate plan birthed by the leader of the Nevergreen. The identity of the Nevergreen's leader is a captivating mystery. Villagers whisper of a connection to Steffy's ancient enemy, this enigmatic embodiment of darkness. They are also rumored to have connections to the mysterious interdimensional threat looming over the kingdom, a danger only The One Hundred seems fully aware of. This raises the question, if The One Hundred knows everything about Evergreen, why do they still remain passive? Are they truly guardians, or are they somehow entangled within the complex web woven by the Nevergreen?
Gleams of Forbidden light and beauty Aletine, gem of untold power Aletine, a captivating gem shrouded in mystery, sits at the heart of Evergreen's enigmatic power structure. Its existence fuels whispers, speculation, and a fierce struggle for control amongst the kingdom's secretive factions. Here, we delve into the mystery concerning this precious stone. First of all, what are the origins of Aletine? Evergreen's bustling streets are rife with speculation regarding Aletine's origins. Villagers, known for their colorful theories, theorize that it is a form of interdimensional material, arrived here at the mysterious cataclysmic event that destroyed everything. Rumors abound of a ripped veil between dimensions, spewing Aletine into Evergreen while leaving devastation in its wake. While most of these village tales are dismissed as mere flights of fancy, the recent revelation of the Aletine vault beneath the Ancient Hotel has given some credence to the notion of an extraordinary origin. However, the truth remains shrouded in secrecy. Only Steffy and the other powerful factions possess any concrete knowledge about Aletine's arrival in Evergreen. Unveiling Aletine: Myth and Reality Clash The truth behind Aletine shatters some village myths while confirming others. While not interdimensional as some theorized, the gem undeniably originates from beyond Evergreen's reality. Its arrival coincided with the cataclysmic event that reshaped the kingdom, a truth only The One Hundred truly understands. This revelation validates a part of the villagers' extravagant theories, a devastating event did occur. However, it disproves the notion of a dimensional tear bringing Aletine here.The gem's origins remain shrouded in secrecy, fueling speculation about the civilization it hailed from. Unveiling the Secrets of Aletine Aletine is the most precious and most protected thing in all of the kingdom. The amount of secrecy surrounding Aletine is almost enough to rival the secrecy surrounding The One Hundred. With so much secrecy surrounding the gem you might be wondering why it is such a big secret. Well as explained before Aletine is hidden under the ancient hotel, the oldest building in Evergreen. Located beneath the ancient hotel, the oldest structure in the kingdom, Aletine predates all other known resources. The exact date of its arrival remains locked away in the archives of The One Hundred, who possess the sole understanding of its properties. Historically, they reveal information only in dire circumstances to safeguard the kingdom. Steffy's mansion and the main hall boast massive Aletine arches, a testament to the gem's power: repelling dark energy and matter. Steffy had the arch built in his mansion after the battle with The Embodiment of Darkness. The gem releases an aura around it stopping anything that contains darkness from passing through whatever it is built in. The shape of the arch is also a key detail to securing the room at the maximum. The arch shape lets the aura bounce off of it and spread to the rest of the mansion but in smaller quantities. Steffy and The One Hundred are the only two who possess this key information about Aletine. Aletine's potential extends beyond this defensive ability. Could it hold further, untapped properties? The possibility of weaponizing this powerful gem remains a question with potentially far-reaching consequences. Aletine’s connections Aletine is not only known to Steffy and The One Hundred. The public knows about this gem as well but so do all the cults in Evergreen. The Heathotels’s archives contain the largest collection of knowledge on Aletine other than what Steffy and The One Hundred know. A single, crucial truth about Aletine's connection to an interdimensional entity eludes even Steffy. Only The One Hundred and the enigmatic leader of the Heathotels are privy to this knowledge. Aletine is connected to some other worldly being. Since its roots can be traced to outside of Evergreen’s world, there must be some other civilisation that made contact with the gem before the Great End. Another thing to take into perspective is that Aletine is one of the oldest substances in the world. Its age could suggest a lost civilization predating the cataclysmic "Great End." Could this civilization have been the first to harness Aletine's power? The gem's connection to another world fuels this speculation. Aletine has undoubtedly passed through countless hands over millennia. Are the Aletinians, with their oath of secrecy, truly in control? Or is Steffy merely a pawn in a larger game? Perhaps a hidden organization, like a rogue faction within The One Hundred or a descendant of the lost civilization, manipulates events from the shadows. The question of who truly controls Aletine lies at the heart of Evergreen's mysteries. Aletine’s potentials Aletine reigns supreme as Evergreen's most potent gem, rivaled only by the enigmatic atmospheric gem. It has many magical properties,Its most celebrated property being the fact that it can repel dark energy and dark matter which came in handy during the War Of Gods. It can also be used for a multitude of different things. One of the most outstanding creations with Aletine is the arches in the Main hall and Steffy’s mansion. They are guarding the archives which contain precious and secretive documents on Evergreen as well as artifacts that have not been exposed to the public. With so many possible uses for Aletine only a select few are actually used. The Aletinians have been told only 6 times in the last century to forge weapons out of Aletine. With those orders coming straight from Steffy himself. With the looming interdimensional threat it is highly likely that a war will start in the next millennium. Who will be the 2 sides is still a mystery. Steffy is also worried about a rebellion, Aletine has caused unrest in the villages which have caused small riots and raids of the libraries and archives yet all of them end in failure. It is another very likely possibility that a civil war will start in the next few hundred years. The main powers may be aware of this and are preparing to defend themselves if this possibility becomes a reality. Yet, the question lingers: with Aletine's apparent defensive capabilities and no documented harm to Evergreen, why such secrecy? Are the powers hiding something more sinister? Could they be preparing for a threat far greater than a civil war, a threat hinted at by the whispers of an interdimensional entity connected to Aletine? Lempty, a gem of mysterious beauty Lempty gems, with their captivating light blue hue and characteristically rough, quadrilateral edges, are a ubiquitous presence in Evergreen. Lempty is not much of a very interesting gem. It is mostly used for decorative purposes and not very much in weapon smithing.Though it has a lack of properties, It has very famous use, Steffy himself has a 5000 year old Lempty encrusted egg. It is originally made out of the bedrock of Evergreen, Eslud, with a few pieces of Lempty embedded in it’s surface. Even with such a useless facade with no redeeming qualities, it is still widely used in architecture especially in the northern villages to portray the cold and the snow that those villages usually experience. Lempty can be found in almost every mine in Evergreen, since it is very widespread it has a very small value. Compared to Aletine it is 7 000 000x less valuable. Since it is so cheap it can be found in almost every piece of jewelry and almost every building contains even a bit of Lempty. Rumors of Lempty's untapped potential for healing pique curiosity. Though currently as mere folklore, such mystery raises intriguing questions. Is Lempty truly just a decorative gem, or is there more to its story? Perhaps Steffy's undying devotion to the Lempty egg holds the key to unlocking its secrets. The parasitic presence of Lempty throughout Evergreen hints at a potential significance waiting to be discovered. Eslud, the foundation of Evergreen Eslud reigns supreme as the most common stone in Evergreen. It literally forms the foundation of the world, as the very mines themselves are carved from this versatile material. Eslud is used most commonly in construction since it can resist high temperatures and immense amounts of pressure. The only interesting property of Eslud is that no matter how much pressure is on it, it stays flexible allowing for buildings made out of it to withstand high winds and earth-shattering quakes. It is also the stone of choice when making heirlooms since it can withstand so much damage keeping the heirloom good as new for generations. The most famous example of this is the 3000 year old Eslud box that has been passed down as the Retule family heirloom. More than just a common stone, Eslud embodies the resilience and unwavering spirit that lies at the heart of Evergreen itself. Atmospheric gem, a power of nature The atmospheric gem is the true rarest gem in Evergreen as it is only found in one place, on the tip of Steffy’s magical staff. It has the power to control the atmosphere hence the name atmospheric gem, thanks to its power to control the atmosphere, Steffy chose this gem as his crystal of choice to harness its magical properties. Though Steffy never found this gem in nature since it is a mix between Aletine, Lempty and Celusi. The exact process of how the Atmospheric gem came into existence is still a closely guarded secret with only Steffy and The One Hundred knowing how the gem was fabricated. The exact origins of the Atmospheric Gem remain a closely guarded secret. While Steffy acknowledges the possibility of finding such a gem naturally in a faraway corner of the universe, he downplays the chances of it existing on Evergreen. It takes intense heat and pressure to let it form correctly and there were many failed attempts to create Atmopsheric with the failures themselves playing a crucial role in the final product. It is quite obvious what Atmospheric does, however, how it achieves this control remains a mystery. Steffy and The One Hundred keep the details shrouded in secrecy. This secrecy fuels speculation: what truly powers the gem, and what drove Steffy to dedicate over a century to crafting it for a seemingly limited ability to control the weather? Could there be a grander purpose behind its creation, a power yet to be revealed? Celusi, the geriatric gem of Tyrlosuh Celusi is one of the rarest gems in the kingdom rivaled only by Aletine. It can only be found in Heatherlea, usually near a patch of heatherberry; studies have shown that the heatherberry benefits from the light residue that emanates from the Celusi. The major families of Evergreen usually have a reserve of Celusi to pay the more hefty fines as well as create new heirlooms for each generation. Unlike the highly sought-after Aletine, Celusi possesses no outwardly magical properties, at least to the casual observer. Steffy and the other major powers seem largely uninterested in the gem. Yet, a single, magnificent purple Celusi, a rarity in its own right, resides with the Tyrlosuh family, one of Evergreen's wealthiest and most prominent lineages, containing almost 250 current living descendants and over 10 generations are currently in the lineage which means they’re are 140 year old people in the family. Botinelosi, is the oldest person in the family standing at 164 years old and is the first person to ever use Celusi in the art of crafting. He stumbled across it while mining in the outskirts of Heatherlea near the village where the family originated, affectionately also named Tyrlosuh. Steffy originally seized control of the mine where Botinelosi found it. The quick seizure of the mine raised suspicion on the properties of Celusi. Steffy eventually allowed Botinelosi to have full control over the mine. Rumors spread through the kingdom like a wildfire, Botinelosi's silence on the matter, coupled with the Tyrlosuh family's secrecy, fuels the rumors. What truth are they hiding? Could Celusi's beauty mask a more significant purpose, a power that rivals even Aletine's? Polompty, a concoction of nature Polompty, a breathtaking gem with an allure unlike any other, shimmers with the colors of Lempty, accented by veins of Eslud embedded deep within its interior. It also comes from the same location as Celusi, near the Tyrlosuh village. By taking its location into consideration it may lead you to believe that Polompty is simply an underdeveloped version of Celusi, which is what Botinelosi originally believed when first discovering it in the abandoned Reveras mine right near the Tyrlosuh mine. Polompty was originally put under extensive studies to discover more information on it, all the studies ended up coming with one answer: Polompty is a marvel of nature, a harmonious blend of 6 different stones and gems. Which explains the presence of Eslud in its core as well as the colors of Lempty. Since it has such a strange yet intriguing beauty it captivated crafters's curiosity which caused an influx of its use to fabricate jewelry. However when Lomi, daughter of Botinelosi, became head of the family the mine was closed off to the public and all sales of Polompty stopped causing shockwaves in the gem market, sparking the infamous Polompty rush. The Polompty rush, a desperate search After Lomi shut down the mine, the supply of Polompty slowly trickled to a stop. Lomi's aged father, Botinelosi, allowed his son Bisel to sell the remaining stones stored in the Tyrlosuh archives. With the Polompty market back on its feet, the family had satiated the market’s hunger. However, Lomi had a different vision for the family's future. She declared her son, Utigo, as her heir, bypassing Bisel's claim. Bisel sadly accepted to avoid being ostracized by the family ending the power struggle for the leadership of the Tyrlosuh lineage. The gem market, unable to sway Lomi, eventually turned its attention elsewhere. It wasn't long before the Retule family, sworn rivals of the Tyrlosuh family, discovered a small grove of Polompty near their Heatherberry fields. With the supply restored, markets everywhere flourished and the Polompty rush ended. This new source rekindled the market for three years, until this supply dwindled as well. Now, with both sources depleted and demand still high, a question lingers: Why did Lomi close the mine, causing economic turmoil? Does she possess knowledge of a hidden danger associated with Polompty, or is there a deeper secret to this extraordinary gem's origin? Families of Evergreen, cults in disguise Tyrlosuh family, from gemstone guardians to fallen shadows The Tyrlosuh family is the largest and wealthiest family in the entire history of the kingdom, they originate from Heatherlea and their family founder is Botinesoli and his loving wife Temorla Tyrlosuh who had 2 children, Lomi Tyrlosuh and Bisel Tyrlosuh. Bisel was originally the next heir for the head of the Tyrlosuh family but after Lomi took power as the first heir she decided to declare her son Ugito as the next heir. Bisel accepted his fate to never be head of the family to avoid being exiled by Lomi. With her decision she completely bypassed Bisel’s bloodline from the lineage, completely extinguishing any chance for any of his descendants to ever ascend to the title of head of family. Though this has never been done in the family, Lomi received backlash from both family members as well as the public as this was seen as an unforgivable act of treason to her own blood. With her destructive decision she removed over 30 descendants from having the last name Tyrlosuh. Bisel’s new family line, the Bisenoty, decided to declare a familial war against the Tyrlosuh. Sparking the Biserlosuh familial war. The Biserlosuh Familial war After Bisel declared a familial war against the Lomi, the population of Azalea and the, affectionately named, Tyrlosuh town, started to pick sides. At the time Bisel had the most support by the villagers considering Lomi was the cause of the Polompty rush. Which brought both fortune and misfortune, and had threatened to burn villager’s houses unless they followed her orders as their new leader, which sowed distrust between the populace. The war was not particularly disastrous since it was between 2 armies of around 400 people. Though the amount of lives lost caused an impact in the surrounding area and sent a shockwave in the gem trade market since the Tyrlosuh family were the largest exporters of stones and gems. Both families ended up losing a combined 86 members, 21 from the Bisenoty family leaving only 13 people left and the rest were from the Tyrlosuh family. This disaster would leave over 1300 civilians injured and over 700 dead, it also caused the partial destruction of the town of Tyrlosuh and the complete destruction of the Bisenoty town. Though not only the family’s town were left in ruin, entire neighborhoods of Azalea were utterly ravaged thanks to the supporters of the 2 families. With Evergreen on the brink of a civil war, Steffy himself had to step in and end the war. Though his attempts failed and the war continued for another 2 years before Lomi and Bisel decided to end the battle for the safety of the kingdom as more and more supporters began to sprout and begin fighting in the other towns. With Evergreen on the brink of absolute and utter chaos, Evergreen’s main entrances were shut down and the capital went into lockdown as protests arose, those protests leading into more chaos with the 2 sides arguing and fighting right outside the Main Hall. The Tyrlosuh archives were burned, the Tyrlosuh and the Reveras mines caved in in certain parts and the majority of the Tyrlosuh made jewelry was either sold to another crafter or destroyed entirely sending hundreds of thousands of objects into the Gray Realm causing a widespread jewelry shortage as well as worries on the safety of the Gray realm. After the war ended the Tyrlosuh family was fined 400 pieces of Celusi and their entire Polompty fortune was seized by the Heathotels. Downfall of the Tyrlosuh After the end of the Biserlosuh war, the Tyrlosuh family lost control over the Polompty mine, the majority of their Celusi hoard, their archive was burned to the ground and their hometown was partially in ruins. With Lomi’s dictatorship over the family and her undying hate for the Bisenoty family as well as the Retule family, she forced the Bisenoty family, which was ravaged by the war, to merge back into the Tyrlosuh family name, unifying the rivals and stopping any further familial civil wars from happening. Bisel decided to step down from the lineage and instead become the first person in the history of Evergreen to not be part of a family, whether it is big or small. With Bisel now gone Lomi had no one to challenge her in her dictatorship of the Tyrlosuh family. Until Botinelosi, founder of the family, decided that the lineage had embarrassed itself enough and removed Lomi as ruler. But Lomi refused and since Botinelosi was in his early 160s he couldn’t fight back against her and allowed her to continue her rule. The public had already lost interest in the family and was now fully against it destroying any hope of any new ruler to repair the damage caused by Lomi’s reckless decisions. The Tyrlosuh family, once revered, now exists as a cautionary tale. Their fall from grace serves as a stark reminder of the dangers of unchecked ambition and the devastating consequences of family discord. However, whispers still linger. Is Lomi truly broken, or is she biding her time, waiting for the opportunity to reclaim her lost glory? And what secrets lie buried beneath the ashes of the Tyrlosuh archives? The answers to these questions may hold the key to the Tyrlosuh family's redemption or their complete downfall. Retule family, fruit fanatics or fantasy fighters? The Retule family stands as a beacon of peace in the often-turbulent world of Evergreen. Unlike their gem-obsessed counterparts, the Tyrlosuh, the Retules view conflict with a deep aversion. Witnessing the devastation of the Biserlosuh War solidified their pacifistic stance. They famously disarmed themselves, donating all their Aletine weaponry to the Aletinians. But they still needed to make a profit, so their founder, Ruservi, created the Reveras mine right near the future area for the Tyrlosuh mine. Ruservi was the first person to explore and exploit that part of the kingdom since it was usually used as a tourist attraction for the rest of the towns to visit the lovely northern flora. He eventually discovered a cave which led into a large cluster of Celusi, which eventually led him to create the Reveras mine to mine out this new source of gems for the kingdom. After extensive testing his scholars noticed that Celusi had positive benefits to Heatherberry and enhanced its growth which led Ruservi to found the largest Heatherberry farm in the history of the kingdom. He led the family into a fruit empire for 140 years until he grew too old to lead the family anymore, at his 178th cycle he decided that his son Rymo would become the new leader of the Retule family. This decision came after the end of the Biserlosuh war which started a large change of ruler in many sections of the kingdom, families were giving way to new rulers and the cults were discussing the leaderships. Steffy decided to join in the massive leadership change adding new managers into the departments and a new Head Librarian into the archives. By the end of the leadership changing era Ruservi had already been ruler of the Retule family for a few months, during those few months he had commissioned the construction of a new town for the Retule family and everyone else who wanted to live there. Though this new project was a cover up for a more devious plot, he was in fact commissioning the Aletinians to forge Lempty weapons for his descendants, which caused distrust in the family after news of this plan came into the light. This revelation cast a shadow over the family's pacifistic ideals. Was Ruservi preparing for a war he alone foresaw? Or was there another, undisclosed reason for the clandestine weapon production? These questions continue to plague the Retules, a family caught between their commitment to peace and the shadows of a hidden agenda. Gatosi family, shadows of the kingdom Hidden within the bustling kingdom of Evergreen lies the Gatosi family, shrouded in secrecy and wielding a power unseen. The Gatosi are in charge of the safety of the archives which explains their secrecy and low popularity amongst the populace of Evergreen. They do not have any famous appearance nor have they ever participated in a war since their founding 3000 years ago. Their founder, Guvn, created the family after he noticed the amount of hate that the concealed archives would get from the public. Forever haunted by the everlasting threat of misuse in the archives. He decided to found a new family that would be in charge of protecting these archives and maintaining their secrecy. But considering the fact that Guvn founded the family over 3000 years ago it means he is long dead, he was 343 at the time of his death which leaves him as the longest serving Head Of Family in the history of the kingdom. They originally were treated with hate because the archives were seen as a threat thousands of years ago. But nowadays the archives are a staple in the culture of Evergreen. Captivating the public’s knowledge on what could be hiding in those labyrinth-like buildings. Now, nestled away in the secluded neighborhoods of Islafield, the Gatosi cultivate their unique Yoern vegetables, rumored to enhance mental clarity, a necessity for navigating the labyrinthine archives. While whispers of their reclusive nature follow them, the Gatosis family silently fulfills their role, the shadows of the kingdom their only companions. Fruits of Evergreen, source of nourishment and mystery Heatherberry The humble heatherberry is a ubiquitous presence in Evergreen's northern villages, especially Heatherlea, its namesake. This incredibly common fruit harbors a rare variant, the purple and orange heatherberry found only in one singular farm in Heatherlea. The farm’s owner has kept their identity to protect this incredibly rare variant of heatherberry. The whispers of Evergreen have always condensed into a wide array of conspiracy theories, in this case they believe that the heatherberry is a mystical edible stone that was brought to the kingdom from the forgotten civilization before Evergreen. Despite repeated debunking. A plethora of people still believe that this outlandish theory is true. The purple and orange heatherberry has been widely known for its rarity but also for its properties. The purple and orange heatherberry has been subject to multiple tests, including Eshwar Mestec’s famous 7676AGE experiments. Controversy and mystery cling to the heatherberry, yet it remains the kingdom's beloved snack, a daily indulgence for an impressive 96% of the population.
If you took the time to read everything please give me feedback or some sort of constructive criticism please
submitted by Steffy_Cookies to worldbuilding [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 05:42 lil_bear_gracie AITA for moving 7 hours away to escape my cult-like family

My parents were very hard workers and worked alot just to be able to keep a roof over my head and food on the table. My grandparents lived right around the corner and I was basically raised by them. I never noticed until looking back years later that my grandmother was a control freak. As years passed alot has happened that I won't get into and I was 18 and just graduated high school. I stopped being at my grandparents house 24/7 like I used to and was no longer answering their 20 phone calls a day. After a few weeks of distancing myself I was talking with my parents and they were floating around the idea of moving like they had for years. All through out highschool I was bullied alot and dealt with alot of mental health issues. I had in the past attempted to end everything but when I failed my cousins and kids at school would bully me for it. So this move would be a really great way to start all over again and try to pull myself back together and find myself again. Once my grandparents and cousins had found out shit hit the fan. I would receive calls from my grandmother constantly harassing me for leaving her and she would do slow drive bys of our house and would even try to break into our house to manipulate us into staying. She said I was the reason the family was falling apart and everyone turned of me and my parents. Then my cousins and aunt started leaving nasty comments on all my social media posts. One day my parents found a house put in an offer and put our house up on the market and it all happened so fast. The next day I receive a letter in the mail of a father's day cars I gave to my grandpa when I was like 10 along with a broken Christmas ornament I made when I was like 5 and gave to my grandmother. Inside the card was my grandmother's writing, "we don't want your lies anymore" referring to the card that I had made telling them how much I loved them. This sent me into a spiral of anger. I finally called the cops on her and showed them all the harassment I had received from her. They said that they would talk to her but aside from that their was nothing they could do unless I took everything to family court. They talked to her and she then proceeded to call me and say how she was untouchable and how she can do anything she wants to me because of free speech. So I went to family court and told them everything. I ended up taking her to court based on an incident where she had put her hands on me and got that sweet precious restraining order. We finally moved out. Time has passed and today I got a message from an old friend of mine. My aunt had messaged her telling her how I was a "crazy bitch". What really makes me upset is this is my dad's parents and his brothers wife who is doing all of this and every once in a while I will see my dad cry because he lost everyone he ever had when all this went down. I just really need to know, am I the asshole or crazy bitch as they like to say for trying to better my life?
submitted by lil_bear_gracie to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 05:39 S0ng81rd Hold on, it's going to be okay.

There is someone out there reading this waiting for a message from someone that may be drawing my attention towards because of my topics I write about.
I am a former and currently struggling addict. I'm not perfect, I don't try to be someone I am not. I am blunt, honest, alone.... Mostly alone.... A lot!
I am a human being that has stumbled many upon many times..... I'm doing it again not all or all at once, but I did all in my past.
Let me break the ice and list some of my sins and addictions.
watching inappropriate films of all topics.
Fornication
Smoking
Drinking
Gossip
Gluttony
In a nice way to list it without the drama story attached to it. I'm guilty of it all.
Don't give in, even though you messed up today. I did too....
Just socializing, I take a drag of a cigarette and then another and then another....
Well, I just smoked and broke my promise again for the millionthteenth time.... So, I'll just smoke for tonight only......
It's 1am now, but I didn't fall asleep yet, so I can smoke until my day actually ends.
F* it, I'll just buy a pack because I'm already smoked yesterday and broke my promise.
You see my demons there!
Yeah, this is current and I'm ashamed and holding myself accountable. I told my person my struggles and allowed them to share their anger towards me for falling back into my old patterns. I still told them and I am working on myself. I am reminding myself where I was and how long I stopped and how far I've come and to not fall back into hurting my body anymore. To love myself more and not harm it because I am not afraid of dying. I need to stop wanting it to happen to me. I need to accept that my life has a purpose and masking my pain won't stop when I am hiding my emotions for a nicotine buzz when I take a break at work.
That is no excuse to pick up the habit. Let your coworkers do it without you. Don't go back to your old habits. Stop it!
That's my Dad yelling at me. I get him interrupting when I free write.
I want you to see that I struggle everyday. I miss smoking every day. I chose the other options to seek a substance over another. I am just like my father. I have an addictive personality and behavior pattern.
I also see where I need to work on myself and I get back in the game. I don't keep with the habit because I fell out of it for a weekend. My Dad won't shut up.
My father died of lung cancer and he never smoked and he is very upset at me for smoking so I could be with him in heaven. He cried next to me as I cried and I gave up singing. I left choir and I had throat problems when I was a senior in college. I didn't get to sing my recital to my father, he passed away before he saw me graduate.
He doesn't want anyone to give in to their addictions. He wishes he followed his dreams of being a service with God by his side. He gave into alcohol and pills. He sees me talking about him on here. I'm letting you see me for who I am and I am not afraid of how you read my story. This is real. This is me. Deal with it or move on.
Sorry about that side tangent. Suz showed up.
She helps me get my throat chakra open so I can share my feelings and stick up for myself. She is well aware of my past and been warning me ever since.
This is about addiction. This is about letting go.
They show up at the worst times, sorry you guys....
I am here to receive and share my story and I fall apart. I am being tested by my enemy and I am sharing my struggles to show my gratitude for awareness. I am more aware to see where I am falling short and work on nurturing those wounds to avoid the old habits of treating it. My inner child, my 20 year old self showed up and what I did back then was miss my Dad and smoke.
I can never fall too far, my Dad shows up and reminds me to write and he helps me get back on track with the topics I write about. It's him taking over my hands and I just start writing.
It's really cool. I miss him and it's weird how he does this, it took me a few tries after becoming very intoxicated with a substance I don't want to trigger you anymore..... Sorry....
I'm not the only one that has this problem. When some of us become intoxicated, we are more intune with spirits. It's not a psychotic break down. It took me a long time to see why my father kept escaping when he had no reason.
He had good reasons, but I wasn't old enough to understand. Until he passed, we are very close, he shares with me many memories and stories of my family I never knew. He taught me how to talk to my Grandmother through music. He lets me know how to handle my mom. He calms me down when I am having a breakdown and my arms hold my body in a hug. I don't move my body, I let my body move on its own. When I allow this to happen, especially when I drank, I saw my father in my memory hugging me tightly. That was when he taught me how to see and communicate with him.
I got used to wanting to be around him more, I kept trying to find how to bring him back, it only happens on special occasions. I don't get to decide how he wants to show up. He just does and I have to be ready to see his signs and feel every moment to enjoy the experience.
He told me today.
"Knock it off! Go write!"
So, here I am. I was wrong. This journey doesn't let me get away with much anymore. I have a purpose why I chose to stray away from God after I went to college and do this stuff.... My adult self is really mad for smoking and drinking so heavily.....
If you are still young, but feel like you did yourself enough damage you don't see the point in stopping......
Just stop.
There's no plan to it, you just do it. It's gonna suck. That part you got to fix is how you think about it once you stop.
This isn't me talking, this is still my Dad teaching me a lesson to not smoke. Because he died a terrible death and he doesn't want me to go the same way. We are working on forgiving each other in giving into our patterns we learned from our family patterns of raising kids. We all have a story. We all came from some form of trauma.
They want to show me how to stop repeating it. I failed this week. It's been a week, not gonna lie and I enjoyed it, but now, I feel regret. Because I do know better.
I know someone out there wants to be serious and stop, but feel alone without someone to show active encouragement.....
Be my cheerleader too!
I need one so I can stop messing up my clean lungs. I worked hard to get them there. I'm gonna get back on track and stop. I hope you are able to get a hold of your addictions too, Whatever it may be.
I feel a little weird about posting this, but they are double dog daring me to do it.
SO, don't judge, but yeah..... Here it is.... Unedited. All me.... Being weird.
Peace,
Tina
submitted by S0ng81rd to u/S0ng81rd [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 05:34 I_IV_Vega DDintoIRAs Part 1: Prerequisite Information for DRSing Shares Held in an IRA

DDintoIRAs Part 1: Prerequisite Information for DRSing Shares Held in an IRA

Ownership vs Control

Separating these two concepts is important to figure out the issue apes have been having with respect to DRSing shares held in an IRA. This might be intuitive, but IMO explicitly defining this helps.
Ownership Control
Referred to as Shareholders Employees
Roles & Responsibilities Big Picture Decision Day-to-day Operations
Incentive? Share value increase, dividends. Salary/Wage
As a shareholder you partake in big picture decisions, such as electing members to the Board of Directors to represent your interests, voting on executive compensation plans, and other matters brought to a shareholder vote. As a shareholder you do not have the authority/right to enter a GameStop retail location and work the cash register for the day. You do not have the right to attend employee meetings at GameStop HQ in Texas. Those responsibilities are left to the employees.

Business Entities/Structure

https://preview.redd.it/rry1ad562i1d1.jpg?width=791&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4194798ab149a4eeb9ed3176ccc7d89271ec2695
This chart is going to do most of the heavy lifting for this section. You can ignore the Sole Proprietorship, General Partnership, and S Corporation if you want, as they aren’t relevant to this DD (as far as I’m aware). As a side note - one of my professors told me that Sole Proprietorships should never be used in general, and I feel obligated to pass that recommendation on. Either way it will not be relevant. C Corporations are only relevant so far as the fact that GameStop is a C Corporation, so you can use that as a comparison if needed.
What I’m really interested in here is the Limited Liability Company, or LLC. Forming an LLC requires filing some paperwork with the appropriate government agency, and you will probably need to file an Operating Agreement, which is basically Corporate Bylaws but for an LLC. These documents are legally binding when done properly and should hold up if challenged in court (as far as I’m aware; I’m not a lawyer). LLCs also exist perpetually as a separate legal entity. Less formal requirements than a corporation so should be easier to set up. Management is outlined in the Operating Agreement. LLCs use pass through taxation, which means that responsibility for paying taxes gets passed on to the owners of the LLC. Terms for transferring interest, if any, are also included in the Operating Agreement.
Now is also probably a good time to mention Trusts as another business entity type. Trusts are similar to LLCs, except the main differences are there are no forms to file with a government agency and no liability protection for the owners. These business entities all use different terminology to describe roles, listed in the chart below:
Ownership Control
C Corporation Shareholders Employees
LLC Member(s) Manager(s)
Trust TrustoBeneficiary Trustee
You should note that LLCs can have a single owner, referred to as a “Single Member LLC” or “SM LLC”. I don’t know where your mind goes when you see those letters typed like that but I’m personally immature and, well…

What is an IRA?

IRAs were introduced through the Employee Retirement Income Security Act of 1974 (ERISA).
26 U.S. Code § 408 (parts bolded by me for emphasis)
  • For purposes of this section, the term “individual retirement account” means a trust created or organized in the United States for the exclusive benefit of an individual or his beneficiaries, but only if the written governing instrument creating the trust meets the following requirements:
(1)Except in the case of a rollover contribution described in subsection (d)(3) or in section 402(c), 403(a)(4), 403(b)(8), or 457(e)(16), no contribution will be accepted unless it is in cash, and contributions will not be accepted for the taxable year on behalf of any individual in excess of the amount in effect for such taxable year under section 219(b)(1)(A).
(2)The trustee is a bank (as defined in subsection (n)) or such other person who demonstrates to the satisfaction of the Secretary that the manner in which such other person will administer the trust will be consistent with the requirements of this section.
(3)No part of the trust funds will be invested in life insurance contracts.
(4)The interest of an individual in the balance in his account is nonforfeitable.
(5)The assets of the trust will not be commingled with other property except in a common trust fund or common investment fund.
(6)Under regulations prescribed by the Secretary, rules similar to the rules of section 401(a)(9) and the incidental death benefit requirements of section 401(a) shall apply to the distribution of the entire interest of an individual for whose benefit the trust is maintained.
This section gives some useful information that can be combined with the previous two sections to find out a bit more. The fact that an IRA is actually a Trust is helpful to know, and by reading this section and understanding how ownership and control works within business entities it becomes easier to see the problem that some have been having trying to DRS shares held in an IRA.
submitted by I_IV_Vega to DDintoGME [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 05:33 hubbysweetnutella India to Netherlands - Processing time?

I will start with a red flag about my application, I am a 30 year old single Indian male applying for a short stay business visa to enter the Netherlands for work related training.
This is my third time travelling to a schengen country. First time I travelled to Sweden for a 40 days visit in 2015 for vacation, second time I was a student in Sweden for a year in 2016.
I have a valid B1/B2 visa to the US as well, and have travelled to US once for 2 week long vacation in 2016. Also one visit to Kuwait for business and vacation.
I work from home from my parents' home in India for a company in the Netherlands since Nov 2022, they invited me for in-person and on-site training, all expenses are sponsored by them. Duration of the training is from 1st June till 1st August. I am a mechanical engineer with a master's in engineering from Sweden.
I applied on 30th April with the following documents, and they reached the embassy for processing on 1st May.
  1. Cover letter explaining, what I do and why I am invited. Along with details about my personal finances, I have around 7000 Eur in cash, and another 7000 eur in credit card balance. Two personal account statement that showed movement of 9000 eur in each in a period of 4 months. Credit card statement showing I spent aroud 2000 EUR the previous month, no dues, or loans in my person or family.
  2. I also mentioned in the cover letter that I handle all my father's businesses in India, as he lives in Kuwait and doesn't visit often. This arrangement began in 2014. Since he has gotten older, I also am starting to visit Kuwait from this year onwards to help him one month every year in August (it's a holiday in the Netherlands for my company in August).
    • I attached a letter from my father narrating how I am the primary caretaker in India and manages all his business. And also saying that I indeed work from his home and that I am invited to Kuwait after my visit to the Netherlands.
      • To show a simple evidence of his claim I have attached two of his bank statement.
      • One account statement showing a total sum of 28,000 eur withdrawn by me from his account through several cheques in a span of 2 months in 2014. A charity amount of 1000 eur sent to the PM of India, same year. This statement also shows that during this period of 2 months he has spent around 90,000 eur.
      • Another account statement showing a total sum of 110,000 Eur spent in a span of 3 months in 2022-2023.
  3. I showed all documents requested in the checklist viz,
    • ITR's
    • Paid flight tickets. India to Amsterdam, and Amsterdam to Kuwait.
    • Home address verification docs like Property tax payment, Electricity bill.
    • Vehicle Registeration doc
  4. An invitation letter written in Dutch by the company I work for narrating my visit, guarantee of sponsorship, their financial documents, company registeration doc and accomodation for me booked by them. And a proof of sponsorship form filled and attested at their muncipality.
  5. I showed three pay slips of 2,300 EUR each as salary of the past three months that I earned from the company inviting me.
I still have a nagging feeling deep down saying there is a chance it might get rejected. I don't know why. I checked with the Swedish embassy via email just in case if there is any fault in my past records, they said that my passport is fine and I can apply for visa if I need to and everything is clean. I just wanted to prevent a huge loss on my boss' part in case if there is an issue in my records.
I also added in the cover letter that I have worked as a volunteer for several registered NGO's helping out in Ukraine and that I am aware how generous and kind the EU is towards poor people who deserve it, hence I won't ever dishonour EU rules or regulations out of respect and honour.
The VFS tracking site says "System is facing some issue please try after sometime" since the past 2 days.
submitted by hubbysweetnutella to SchengenVisa [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 05:26 Dangerous-Space1907 Wedding copy cat

Rant post & super long, sorry!
Just needing reassurance that I have a right to feel the way I do
Basically my FH's childhood best friend's mother and FH father have been together for 13+ yrs. FH childhood friend & gf started dating 6 months after us (12 yrs this yr) Well I've never really gotten along with his gf she's one of those ppl who are jealous and competitive with people and always trying to copy and 1 up (she even went as far as jumping her length of dating so they could be dating before FH & I 🙄 and got mad when i pointed out it was incorrect)
Anyways we're getting married in September and iv been planning for over a yr but kept it quiet and specifically avoiding telling her cause I just knew she'd try and copy us and get married the same yr. well silly me made a few tiktoks the end of 2023 hinting at marriage and she seen them and asked if I was getting married which I ignored. The following month she posted an enegment ring on fb and when ppl congradulated her said they've been engaged for while just havnt got the ring till now ( which isnt technically wrong as They've posted on social media they are engaged multiple times within the 12 yrs almost like she forgets he "proposed")
I ended up cutting contact with her around dec 2023 due to a matter unrelated to this but hubby kept her on social media which is OK I just chose to cut ties for my mental health. Fast forward jan 1 was 11 yrs since hubby proposed I shared a memory on FB tagging him saying it's time to tie the knot soon. We'll she seen it and a few hrs later posted her and her bf just randomly decided that day (her words) that they were going to Get married in 2024/2025. I just found out from a family member she posted 2 days ago they are getting married in October for their anniversary. It's really bugging me because I she's only doing it because she figured out we were getting married. She hasn't talking about a wedding since before covid and just started after I started mentioning it.
Also to add Hubby removed her a few months ago due to reason too long to get into and the same day she posted they were getting married she tried to add him on FB 🤔 which makes me feel even more like she's doing it on purpose
Am I wrong for being annoyed and a little mad? It just seems so gross like she's trying To live the same lives as us. What's ur thoughts?
submitted by Dangerous-Space1907 to rant [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 05:18 Dangerous-Space1907 Advice on copying cats

Rant post & super long, sorry!
Just needing reassurance that I have a right to feel the way I do
Basically my FH's childhood best friend's mother and FH father have been together for 13+ yrs. FH childhood friend & gf started dating 6 months after us (12 yrs this yr) Well I've never really gotten along with his gf she's one of those ppl who are jealous and competitive with people and always trying to copy and 1 up (she even went as far as jumping her length of dating so they could be dating before FH & I 🙄 and got mad when i pointed out it was incorrect)
Anyways we're getting married in September and iv been planning for over a yr but kept it quiet and specifically avoiding telling her cause I just knew she'd try and copy us and get married the same yr. well silly me made a few tiktoks the end of 2023 hinting at marriage and she seen them and asked if I was getting married which I ignored. The following month she posted an enegment ring on fb and when ppl congradulated her said they've been engaged for while just havnt got the ring till now ( which isnt technically wrong as They've posted on social media they are engaged multiple times within the 12 yrs almost like she forgets he "proposed")
I ended up cutting contact with her around dec 2023 due to a matter unrelated to this but hubby kept her on social media which is OK I just chose to cut ties for my mental health. Fast forward jan 1 was 11 yrs since hubby proposed I shared a memory on FB tagging him saying it's time to tie the knot soon. We'll she seen it and a few hrs later posted her and her bf just randomly decided that day (her words) that they were going to Get married in 2024/2025. I just found out from a family member she posted 2 days ago they are getting married in October for their anniversary. It's really bugging me because I she's only doing it because she figured out we were getting married. She hasn't talking about a wedding since before covid and just started after I started mentioning it.
Am I wrong for being annoyed and a little mad? It just seems so gross like she's trying To live the same lives as us. What's ur thoughts?
Edit to add Hubby deleted her a few months ago from FB and she tried adding him the same day she posted they were getting married 🤔
submitted by Dangerous-Space1907 to wedding [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 05:13 Quiet_Scene_3727 Have You Heard Of Reverend Somber

I never thought I’d see myself writing on this forum or at least I hope I wouldn’t have to. My name is Miriam Jackson and I’m looking for a friend. Her name is Jocelyn Willard and I haven’t received anything from her for over a month.
Jocelyn went to Jonesborough, Tennessee for an investigative story on Reverend Somber.
I have only 6 files she sent me while on this trip, as I sometimes help her with editing and filing notes. Hopefully, they can help give the person who’s reading this the information necessary to help find her.
Jocelyn is a freelance journalist, who delved into journalism as she sees it as “the beacon of truth” Her newest fixation was televangelism. I know… I know in this day and age who's watching cable but that to Jocelyn is what made it more interesting.
Especially when she stumbled across Reverend Somber, unlike his name Reverend Sombers is charismatic ( as most in televangelism are) and speaks with such a feverish devotion you’d think you’re hearing the voice of God speak through him. He can often be found preaching on CTN at around 2 A.M. In his words `` Jesus had not come to talk to the righteous but to those who know they are sinners, and at this time sweetheart only sinners are watching.”
What caused Jocylen to want to investigate Somber’s I don’t know.

File#1: Gas Station _Towns People_Sombers Letter.Doc

I’m about a little less than a mile out on the outskirts of Jonesborough. I make a stop at the only gas station I’ve seen since leaving Route 321 about 30 minutes ago.
As I get out of my car I take in the sun something I don’t get enough of in Seattle. The gas station still has the reminiscence of different decades passed; with its paint chipped around the brick exposing its rustic hues and the sign tilted “Whitmens Gas Station Est.1910”.
I open the door causing a bell to ring,
“Hello, what can I help you with today darlin’,” said the lady behind the counter. She seemed about 60 years old her hair not yet fully gray and her face showing the emotions she’s worn over the years.
“ Hi, I just want to fill up my tank, I’m parked at pump 1,” I said.
“Well alright, what got you coming to these parts?”
“Oh, I’m writing on Reverend Sombers I’m supposed to go follow him as he goes live tonight for CTN”
“Ain’t that a treat, I swear when I hear him preach on Sundays it’s like the Lord is speaking through him,” she said in such a way you’d think she’d seen Heaven in that man's eyes.
“Well isn’t that something…How long has he been preaching for?” I ask as I pick at the hangnail on my finger. The admiration she had for the Reverend made me uneasy but I’d figured she’d know some background on him. Oddly she didn’t.
“Oh, He came around 3 years ago, it seemed like he just popped up at the church now that I think about it, The town was nothing like the peace it is now, Sombers brought this town into prosperity I tell ya.”Her brows furrowed as though she just realized something.
“I almost forgot to tell Earl to put the gas in ya car, go wait out there I’ll go tell him.”
Taking this as my queue that the interview is over I walk over to my car and wait inside for the man to arrive. A tap on my passenger-side window snaps me out of my daydreaming.
“I filled your gas up, Ruth told me you’ve been askin bout Reverend Sombers said you’d be writin on him.” Earl said.
“Yeah, do you have anything you’d like to share?” I shift in my seat as I take in Earl. He seems a bit younger than Ruth, his hands caked with oil stains and his shirt spotting the same look. A small towel lays on his shoulder. He leans into my passenger-side window before he answers
“I ain’t too fond of him don’t tell Ruth now she’d be madder than a wet hen I tell ya.” he coughs and laughs
“What are you not fond of?” Interested in figuring out what Earl knows that Ruth doesn’t
“I don’t speak too much on him don’t want him comin round here, you best be goin now ya tank is full. Have a good stay now ma’am” He smiled his teeth showing a testament to years of tobacco use.
I smile meekly back and wave bye as I head into town. Left with more questions I know I’ve not made a dumb decision by investigating Somber.
The town is picturesque many of it still having the structures from the 1800s it’s the oldest town in Tennessee after all. As I drive through town I take in the families walking and neighbors saying hi to each other. Almost too cookie-cutter.
I parked my car in front of Jonesborough Bed and Breakfast a quaint Victorian-era cottage. The overgrown bushes cover the majority of the white picket fence. A homey cottage and a hot meal sounds great right about now. I enter and am warmly greeted by the B&B owner.
“Hi, I’m Mary-Ann you must be Jocylen only person we have booked to stay for so long.”
“Yes, that would be me. I’m wondering if you could recommend a place for lunch. I'm quite hungry.” I put a hand to my stomach. I should've grabbed a snack at the gas station I thought.
“There’s the local diner just up the street, Your room is the first door on the right upstairs. It’s the Reverend's favorite. He thought you’d like it… that reminds me Reverend Somber will be having dinner with you today and said he’d want to speak with ya before you go follow him around. He left a lil welcome basket for ya upstairs,” she said
I thanked her then made my way to my room wondering what he’d left for me.
The room has a king-sized canopy bed in the middle with a white- Linen curtain draped on top. Stands out from the rest of the room, The canopy is supported by twisted columns and the back wall of the bed is structured architecturally containing a niche with a shell decoration and four more smaller twisted columns surrounded by leaf decorations. The deep walnut wood of the bed is a contrast to the faded yellow stained floral wallpaper and average closet in the corner of the room. The bed was foreign to this room, I just knew it.
I look at the welcome basket on the bed filled with fruit, wine, a letter, and oddly finger cots. The letter stated the following
Dear, Miss Willard
Thank you for your interest in my humble serving of the lord. I’d like to take ya to dinner at The Black Olive to better acquaint ourselves before you shadow me today. I hope the finger cots give you rest from your constant finger picking what a painful nervous tick to have for the past 20 years. Grace and peace to you in the name of Jesus Christ.
Sincerely,
Reverend Somber
I felt the sweat dripping from the back of my neck and my hands shaking as I folded the letter back up. All I can think is
who the fuck is Reverand Sombers.

submitted by Quiet_Scene_3727 to nosleep [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 05:13 OtherInvestment4251 Triggered and Confused?

I’m so tired of having no idea what I did wrong and not understanding why certain situations that I think are completely normal wind up blowing up I’m my face.
I am so beyond confused so please tell me your honestly opinions because I need to know.
I took a picture a few days ago and yesterday when I came across it I noticed my “elf ears”, as everyone calls them, were the most prominent iv ever noticed.
I remembered a post I had seen in the EDS sub several months ago and part of it asked:
“ DAE have ears with incorrectly formed cartilage?”
So I was curious myself, read the rules, and posted this first:
“Ears 🦻🏼
Hell to the O my people. 🧚‍♂️
A few months ago I remember seeing a post on one of the EDS subs I follow (not sure if it was this one) asking about these same ear abnormalities (idr what she called them) and couldn’t get a good enough pic at the time so I moved on.
Well I took this pic today and my inner Legolas is showing🧝🏼‍♀️ IYKYK
Is this a common EDS thing?
My dad always said when my younger sisters and I were born he would look at our ears and knew he was the father because we all have these points from him 🙄
Is there a technical name for this?”
It got deleted for breaking the rules, I didn’t understand why, so I messaged MOD (first photo) I thought I was being direct on my understanding and trying to gain clarification and even made it a priority to mention that I have a learning disability and maybe it was how I worded it, etc. and to end it positively so it doesn’t come across as hostile or argumentative.
I then reposted it a second time and fixed the title, because it literally got deleted and added the name of the cartilage abnormality and welcomed any info if anyone has. I once again made it a priority to fix these issues so I could better abide by the rules….
“My post got deleted🤪
Ears 🦻🏼
Hell to the O my people. 🧚‍♂️
A few months ago I remember seeing a post on one of the EDS subs I follow (not sure if it was this one) asking about these same ear abnormalities (idr what she called them) and couldn’t get a good enough pic at the time so I moved on.
Well I took this pic today and my inner Legolas is showing🧝🏼‍♀️ IYKYK
Does anyone else notice these abnormalities? I’m wondering if it’s more common in those with EDS
My dad always said when my younger sisters and I were born he would look at our ears and knew he was the father because we all have these points from him 🙄
I found the technical name, it’s called Darwin’s tubercle!
If anyone has further info I’d love for you to send it my way!”
MOD then deleted this post as well and respond with second photo followed by 3rd photo.
Why did I get banned?! I have no idea how I was being passive aggressive, I literally kept making it a priority to NOT come across this way.
I’m really annoyed by this and just can’t wrap my head around any of it or why I’m even banned and part of me feels pissed because I mentioned I had a learning disability and could have miscommunicated, asked you to let me know and fixed the issues and you just banned me all of a sudden and say I’m passive aggressive?
They never deleted the other persons post or banned them…and it for the same mod automated message mine did.. I’m so confused and it’s making me feel like it was personal for them or something, idk
submitted by OtherInvestment4251 to AutisticAdults [link] [comments]


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