Pain shooting down arm and legs

Hi everyone, apologies for the long story. I've had flat feet for as long as I can remember. I pronate, likely excessively and it never bothered me much until my 30s (I'm 33). Due to other more serious hip injuries I didn't care much and prioritized fixing my hips. Had a hip surgery about 1.5 years ago which required crutches for 6 weeks. After returning to weightbearing, I very quickly developed bad tarsal tunnel syndrome and likely PTTD in my right foot. I had general pain 24/7 from the tarsal tunnel syndrome with inner ankle pain when weightbearing.
Made the switch to minimalist shoes about a year ago. Saw a foot PT, and Podiatrist at the same time. Both said my right foot was extremely dysfunctional, and the ankle was completely collapsing through my gait cycle. I was told I have forefoot varus causing the overpronation. Podiatrist told me I need orthotics for life and should never walk barefoot again. I couldn't accept that, so I went slow, ramped up my walking combined with PTTD targeted exercises (single leg calf raises, tib raises, short foot, single leg hopping, ankle inversion etc.). The tarsal tunnel syndrome and ankle pain persisted, but lessened over 9 months. It seemed like the more walking I did in minimalist shoes, the better my foot and ankle felt. The minimalist walking was a go-to pain reliever for me, which was odd but I didn't complain.
For the last 3 months, my foot has been completely symptom and pain free. I've been averaging at least 8-10k steps a day for over 6 months now, and I've been exclusively in minimalist shoes for longer. I've been going on very short runs as well (~2km) for a few months, and honestly have felt more limited by my rehabbing hips than my feet. I have been ecstatic and honestly never thought I'd be pain free after the horrid case of tarsal tunnel syndrome I had and what I was told by "experts". I still pronate a lot, but it is definitely less than a year ago, and my arches are more pronounced, though still pretty flat.
All of a sudden maybe 2 weeks ago, I noticed inner ankle soreness after a short run on both feet, right foot being much much worse, with pain along the medial arch and a bit on the top of the ankle. Since then, it has not improved after a short period of rest. I've very recently reintroduced my PTTD exercises as well, but they are actually painful to perform versus bringing relief like before. Walking longer than 10 minutes results in pretty intense ankle and medial arch pain. My daily steps have decreased significantly, and running is out of the question. Even just standing barefoot for longer than a few minutes brings on the pain. I'm confused at how it has gotten this bad so fast.
I am doubting that this is just a flare up and honestly debating getting orthotics to settle things down, or maybe just to accept this might be how it was always going to go. I'm just finding it hard to believe the current reality given all the pain I already endured in the last year and a half and recovering to a point of being completely pain free for months. Any stories or advice anyone can offer?

This is just idle speculation, but I thought it might be fun to see if we can guess which "what if" episodes to expect.
We know from the into Door delivers that Night Springs DLC is likely to consist of several episodes in a what if style, attempts of Alan's to escape that didn't quite meet the criteria of "true fiction" and thus fell apart.
In bopping along to the Night Springs song off the soundtrack, I keep thinking it's describing several of these episodes. Who do we think will feature in them? If it's truly multiple playable characters that is (and not just Tim Breaker all the way through)
Lyrics here:
Space invader, looking cute in a human suit Secret agents with the down-down rays they shoot Psychic powers, hypno eyes and magic fruit Trees, machines, weird mysteries We got freaky fantasies In Night Springs, psycho killer on the run In Night Springs, I don the black hole sun 'Cause in Night Springs, we're just looking for the thrill All your nightmares come true Crashing through the warning signs, your car breaks down just outside In Night Springs Endless versions of this town, Buck hold off the Elder God Live inside a sleepless dream, better let her sleep in Night Springs If I died in your arms, I don't mind it I'd hunt you when you like it In Night Springs, caught in an endless time loop In Night Springs, a solar system in your soup 'Cause in Night Springs, we're just looking for the thrill All your nightmares come true Lost in mist for days and days, now you see the sunny seas Night Springs
1) Breaker even mentioned aliens I believe in one interaction with him. This feels like the most obvious one: an X-Files-lile episode, possibly featuring our favorite Director interacting with Breaker during some sort of alien event.
2) psycho killer seems easy enough! Perhaps Rose matching wits against a boss level Taken like Nightingale?
3) "Buck hold off the Elder God" sounds an awful lot like the Cult of the Tree might get some air time. Maybe in the same sense as they are in the main story: they're a cult dedicated to protecting the town, but in this case we get more cosmic horror style storytelling.
4) for some reason "solar system in your soup" makes me think of that Twilight Zone where the kid had omnipotent powers, sort of a St Elsewhere snow globe kind of situation. I don't know how you turn that into an episode of playable content though.
(Likewise the "crash through the warning signs, car breaks down just outside" is a classic Twilight Zone sequence)
5) Psychic powers, hypno eyes and magic fruit sounds groovy as heck but psychic powers obviously makes me think of Control, or perhaps even Hartman (with his MO or brainwashing artists to control them), or Zane from Nightless Night where he hit on themes of mind control and Manson-like levels of cult of personality and devotion.
6) related, possibly, black hole sun sounds like an eclipse, which is sort of the thematic opposite of Nightless Night, so might have another Zane tie in there.
I know we don't have any actual evidence but it is fun (for me) to speculate:D anyone have any alternate reads on the lyrics, or anything Breaker mentioned that I forgot?

I have been doing goblet squats with a kettlebell and holding the kettlebell out in front of my chest....of course not fully extended but holding it out a little.
I fount that this worked out well for being able to throw my hips back while a squat down with my legs.
However, it crossed my mind that this may be putting an awkward strain on my neck (although no neck pain) so today I tried holding in the kettlebell into my chest as I did the squats.
I found that is was impossible to throw my hips back and that it was basically just legs down (it seemed like it was not really a proper squat).
Hmm.....
Is it better to hold out the kettlebell a little or hold it into my chest when doing goblet squats with a kettlebell?
Thanks.

i (23F) was out last night in portland oregon, with a group of “friends” at the club. it was extremely packed & as i was making my way to the dance floor, the sway of the crowd pushed me into a girl who got in my face and started pressing me to back up. i was trying to explain to her that i wasn’t trying to cause problem, & we got pushed into her again & she attacked me. she dragged me down by my hair, punched me in the head & started going in on me. i called the police & she beat me up again outside & ran off. i got her name & video/photos of her. my question is .. is it worth pressing charges for battery? i’m in the urgent care getting looked at because my head is pounding, i have pain in my arm, neck, back, & hips, & i feel dizzy. i was denied medical attention at the scene because the medics said i “looked fine”, but im here now because of how i feel. what do you suggest?

EXT. CAMELOT - CASTLE DAY
(The castle of Camelot stands over grassy hills and crystal clear rolling rivers and seas. Gray clouds cover the sky and hundreds of soldiers and knights can be seen riding toward the castle. Text appears on the screen reading “CAMELOT” and then “CENTURIES AGO”.)
INT. CASTLE - THRONE ROOM - DAY
(MORGANA LE FAY (Centuries-Old), a beautiful middle aged appearing woman with sharp features and long flowing black hair, sits on the throne and holds Excalibur, the Crown of Camelot sits upon her head. Knights and soldiers march in linear motions through the hall. DEWIN (30s), a scruffily charming magician, enters in handcuffs, with guards behind him. Dewin marches up and presents himself to Morgana. Everyone in the room halts.)
MORGANA: State your name.
DEWIN: You know my name, Morgana.
MORGANA: State your name.
DEWIN: Dewinson of Merlin.
MORGANA: You are being tried with treason and conspiracy against the crown. Do you plead guilty to these crimes?
DEWIN: That depends.
MORGANA: On what?
DEWIN: Who you consider the crown to be.
(Dewin slips his handcuffs off and as he does three Blue Jays come flying out of his sleeve and begin to fly around the room.)
MORGANA: Enough foolishness. I find you guilty of the accusations placed upon you.
DEWIN: Then kill me.
MORGANA: Hm?
DEWIN: Let’s skip past the chatter and get my head on a platter. You see what I did there? Chatter platter.
MORGANA: Silence! Death is far too good for you.
DEWIN: Do your worst, no matter what Camelot will fall.
MORGANA: Is that a threat?
DEWIN: A threat would be something I plan on doing to you myself, the fall of Camelot, well that will be purely your doing.
(Morgana gets off the throne and draws a glowing circle around Dewin with Excalibur, as she does so Dewin lets out a small laugh.)
DEWIN: Binding me? My imprisonment shall not halter the winds of time.
MORGANA: I banish you.
DEWIN: What?
MORGANA: From this plane of time and place I banish you.
DEWIN: Not even you have the power to do that. Banishment spells have been hidden away for ages.
MORGANA: Hidden away in scrolls buried in this very castle. Dilflannu o’r awyren hon.
DEWIN: No.
MORGANA: Dilflannu o’r amser hwn.
DEWIN: No, no, stop.
MORGANA: Dilflannu o’r meddwl. Rwy’n eich gwahardd!
(Morgana’s eyes turn purple and electricity sparks all around Dewin and seems to be sucking the energy out of him.)
EXT. LONDON - FOREST - DAY
(A plain and put together autumnal forest. Text appears over the screen reading “LONDON” and then “EIGHTEEN EIGHTY FIVE”. Electricity sparks and Dewin appears in the forest dazed and confused. He is covered in scars and almost immediately passes out face forward into the ground.)
EXT. LONDON - FOREST - DAY
(As night begins to dawn Dewin is still incapacitated. A carriage led by a horse named, Sally, comes through the forest and halts at Dewin. ALDEN SMITH (Early 40s), a plump and posh man with a defining bushy mustache, cautiously hops out of the carriage. Alden looks around for a moment before spotting Dewin. Alden approaches Dewin and checks his pulse through his arm. Alden’s eyes linger on Dewin for a moment before looking up.)
ALDEN: Hello!? Is anybody there!?
(Alden waits for a moment before looking back down at Dewin. Alden sighs and then lifts Dewin up and into the carriage before hopping in himself. Alden pulls on the horse’s reins and it begins to march forward.)
EXT. LONDON - WICING DRIVE - NIGHT
(Alden drives his carriage down Wicing Drive and parks in front of a townhome, Twenty Six Wicing Drive. Alden gets out of the carriage, carrying Dewin, and walks up the steps. MINERVA SMITH (Early 40s), a stern yet radiant woman, opens the door in shock.)
ALDEN: It’s a long story.
INT. TWENTY SIX WICING DRIVE - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
(A stereotypical Victorian living room made primarily of oak and illuminated by two small oil lamps and a burning fireplace. Dewin is still incapacitated and lies on the table covered in bandages, Alden and Minerva hover over him. Bottles of ointment sit next to Dewin.)
MINERVA: What were you doing in the woods?
ALDEN: It’s the fastest cut home.
MINERVA: And you just-
(Minerva is interrupted by Dewin’s sighing as he wakes up.)
DEWIN: Ah! Where am I? Who are you?
MINERVA: My name is Minnie, and this is my husband, Alden.
DEWIN: What’s happening?
ALDEN: I found you all bruised in the middle of the forest. Do you know what happened to you?
DEWIN: Morgana le Fay banished me.
(Alden and Minerva glance at each other.)
MINERVA: Oh lord, I think you're a bit confused.
DEWIN: I am not confused. I am Dewin, son of Merlin. Now if you don’t mind, I’d like to ask if you could take me to a sage or healer?
MINERVA: Of course, Alden can take you tomorrow morning, but for the night you can stay here.
DEWIN: Why, thank you.
ALDEN: Minnie, may I speak to you in the other room?
MINERVA: Of course.
(Alden and Minerva step into the kitchen.)
INT. TWENTY SIX WICING DRIVE - KITCHEN - NIGHT
ALDEN: We can not keep this man in our home. He is mentally insane.
MINERVA: Which means we must watch over him.
ALDEN: I am looking out for our safety.
MINERVA: And where would we take him?
ALDEN: I don’t know. He is as mad as the Doeth man!
MINERVA: Then that’s where we’ll take him.
ALDEN: Stick to nuts together?
MINERVA: The man has some common sense and he’s very compassionate.
ALDEN: Perfect.
EXT. LONDON - ALDRICH’S HOUSE - NIGHT
(Alden and Minerva Dewin sit in their carriage with Dewin outside of a small house that is slightly separated from the other homes on the street.)
DEWIN: So this is the home of a healer?
ALDEN: According to him. I will go to the door alone, I do not want to scare him.
(Alden gets out of the carriage and starts heading towards the home.)
MINERVA: So you really do believe that you are the son of Merlin.
DEWIN: I know who my father was. Why is this such a puzzle for you and your husband to wrap your heads around?
MINERVA: Why I’ve only heard stories of Camelot, myths of ancient pasts.
DEWIN: So Morgana not only shifted my place but also the time.
(Alden knocks on the home's door and is greeted by ALDRICH DOETH (Hundreds Of Years Old), an older looking man with crystals strapped around his neck.)
ALDRICH: Doctor Smith, have they finally sent someone to take me away to a nuthouse?
ALDEN: On the exact contrary, I’ve found a wounded man who claims to have been sent here by Morgana le Fay.
ALDRICH: That’s what the shift was!
ALDEN: What? You know what it doesn’t matter, as long as you’re willing to take this man.
ALDRICH: Yes, yes, bring him to me.
ALDEN: Minerva, send him up!
(Dewin comes up to the door.)
DEWIN: Hello.
ALDRICH: My goodness, the energy pulsates off of you.
DEWIN (TO ALDEN): This is the healer?
ALDEN: Yes. Now if you two don’t mind I think I will be headed back on my way.
ALDRICH: Are you sure, Doctor? It’s getting rather late, you and your wife are welcome to stay here.
ALDEN: Thank you, but there’s no need.
(Rain starts pouring out of the sky out of nowhere and thunder and lighting begin.)
ALDRICH: What about now, Doctor?
ALDEN: Minnie! We’re staying here tonight!
INT. ALDRICH’S HOUSE - LIVING SPACE - DAY
(A cluttered mess of books, candles, and potions. Aldrich, Alden, Minerva, and Dewin sit on Aldrich’s circular array of couches and chairs.)
ALDRICH: Before we dive in I suggest you go wash off, Dewin. The washroom is that small one to your left.
DEWIN: Thank you, Aldrich.
(Dewin gets up and goes into the washroom.)
ALDRICH: I know what you two think of me, the neighborhood’s resident crazy.
MINERVA: Not at all, Mister Doeth.
ALDRICH: Don’t lie, Minerva, our actions all come back to bite us.
ALDEN: So we think you're mental, what of it?
ALDRICH: There are dark forces amongst us, Mister and Misses Smith. I believe that Dewin is here to save us.
ALDEN: I appreciate you letting us stay here, but I think it’s time we leave.
ALDRICH: I will change this storm into an earthquake to keep you here if I must.
ALDEN: Come on, Minnie.
(Alden and Minerva get up and go to leave when the whole room begins to shake.)
ALDEN: What’s happening!?
ALDRICH: I warned you.
(Aldrich makes silencing symbols with his hands and the storm and the shaking stops.)
ALDRICH: Now will you listen to me?
(Alden and Minerva both sit back down.)
ALDEN: What are you?
AlDRICH: A magician, a clairvoyant, a healer, I am all of those things and more.
ALDEN: Why do you want us here so badly?
ALDRICH: I don’t think it’s a coincidence that you are the one who found Dewin, Doctor Smith. He needs a guide in this vast new world. Prophecy states that when the second coming of the Camelot war comes, the savior will have a protector.
ALDEN: And why me?
ALDRICH: There are questions that only we can answer ourselves.
(Dewin comes out of the washroom and sits back down.)
ALDRICH: Dewin, please tell me exactly how you arrived here.
DEWIN: Morgana le Fay used an ancient banishing spell on me.
ALDRICH: The fall of Camelot.
(Suddenly a wind sweeps through the room that blows out all the candles.)
MINERVA: Mister Doeth, are you doing this?
ALDRICH: No.
(A match is lit in the center of the room to reveal GWENWYN LIGHTWOOD (Centuries-Old), a green draconic humanoid woman in black robes and a hood.)
GWENWYN: Aldrich.
ALDRICH: Lady Lightwood.
GWENWYN: I’ve tracked a shift in magic to your home.
ALDRICH: It is this boy, he was banished here from Camelot.
(Gwenwyn goes up to Dewin and takes her hood off to reveal her scaly appearance. Alden gasps in disbelief. Gwenwyn runs her finger down Dewin’s cheek.)
GWENWYN (TO ALDRICH): Hm. I presume you wish to let him roam freely?
ALDRICH: With guidance, yes.
GWENWYN: If one thing goes wrong you will be punished.
ALDRICH: I know.
DEWIN (TO GWENWYN): Who are you?
GWENWYN: The last of the dragons. Just as Aldrich is the last descendent of the Family Merlin.
DEWIN (TO ALDRICH): You're a descendant of my father?
ALDRICH: Of his sister, I have many of her poems and spell tombs still intact here.
GWENWYN: Magic is rare these days, endangered, most people don’t even know it exists. So are we under agreement on the boy, Aldrich?
ALDRICH: Yes, but something is still troubling. If you and I both felt Dewin’s presence then-
GWENWYN: Benjamin did too.
DEWIN: Who is Benjamin?
ALDRICH: A descendant of Morgana who wishes to rule the earth under her ideals.
GWENWYN: A very very dangerous man who will certainly kill me if he finds me here.
(Gwenwyn’s match extinguishes and after a moment the candles all reignite but Gwenwyn is gone.)
ALDEN: By Jove!
ALDRICH: So do you all accept this challenge?
DEWIN: What challenge?
ALDRICH: Defeating Benjamin Fayle.
DEWIN: Of course!
ALDEN: Absolutely not.
ALDRICH: Are you that repulsed by compassion?
ALDEN: I can’t risk Minerva of I’s life on what could all be me hallucinating.
ALDRICH: You're risking the world for a craven excuse.
ALDEN: Goodbye.
(Alden gets up.)
ALDEN: Let’s leave, Minnie.
MINERVA: Thank you for your hospitality, Mister Doeth, and good luck.
(Alden leaves, followed by Minerva.)
EXT. LONDON - ALDRICH’S HOUSE - NIGHT
(Alden and Minerva ride through the street in their carriage.)
MINERVA: We were definitely drugged.
ALDEN: Absolutely.
EXT. LONDON - WICING DRIVE - NIGHT
(Alden and Minerva hop out of their carriage.)
ALDEN: I’m going to bring Sally back to the stables.
MINERVA: Goodnight, love you.
ALDEN: I love you most.
(Minerva goes up and enters Twenty Six Wicing Drive as Alden detaches Sally from the carriage and begins to guide her down the cobbled sidewalk with one of his hands on her reins.)
EXT. LONDON - FOREST - NIGHT
(Alden guides Sally through the forest to a set of stables. Sally suddenly rears up and neighs in terror.)
ALDEN: What is it Sally?
(Sally suddenly breaks off her reins and runs towards the stables. A figure in a dark purple hood and robe sweeps past Alden and their eyes glow purple. Alden screams.)
INT. TWENTY SIX WICING DRIVE - BEDROOM- DAY
(Alden and Minerva lay next to each other asleep in bed. Alden wakes up screaming which awakens Minerva.)
MINERVA: What’s the matter?
ALDEN: Just a night terror.
MINERVA: We did the right thing with Dewin, he’s with someone like him now.
ALDEN: Is that really a good thing? I think I’m going to go to the pub.
MINERVA: This early in the morning?
ALDEN: I need to clear my head after yesterday.
INT. GRIFFIN’S TAIL PUB - DAY
(A traditional Victorian pub. Dewin sits at the bar and is served by BRYNN CROWING (Early 30s), a charming bartender.)
BRYNN: What can I get you, Mate?
DEWIN: Just a pint of mead, please.
(Brynn goes and pours Dewin a pint of mead that she brings back to him and he begins drinking.)
BRYNN: I like your outfit, it’s very medieval.
DEWIN: It was made by the tailor of Sir Gawain.
(Brynn gives a light chuckle.)
BRYNN: What’s your name?
DEWIN: Dewin, and yours?
BRYNN: Brynn.
(Alden enters and sees Dewin. Alden leaves, but as he does he spots another person in a dark purple robe and hood with glowing purple eyes.)
DEWIN: You're very beautiful.
BRYNN: Why, thank you.
DEWIN: Would you like to go for a stroll?
BRYNN: My shift here doesn’t end till six.
DEWIN: Then I’ll see you then.
BRYNN: I guess you will.
(Dewin finishes his mead and drops two silver coins with dragons etched into them on the bar before swiftly leaving. Brynn picks up the coins and looks at them with confusion and yearning.)
EXT. LONDON - ALDRICH’S HOUSE - DAY
(Alden knocks on the door and Aldrich opens it.)
ALDRICH: I’ve been expecting you, come in.
(Alden follows Aldrich into the home.)
INT. - ALDRICH’S HOUSE - LIVING SPACE - DAY
(Alden and Aldrich sit across from each other.)
ALDRICH: Can I offer you some tea?
ALDEN: No thank you, I want to be in the clearest state of mind possible here.
ALDRICH: So what ignited your appearance here?
ALDEN: I’ve been seeing these people.
ALDRICH: Who are “these people”?
ALDEN: They wear these dark robes and their eyes glow purple.
ALDRICH: Faley’s society.
ALDEN: What?
ALDRICH: Benjamin Faley, the evil man I mentioned last night. Is this what caused you to believe?
ALDEN: What are you saying?
ALDRICH: That you believe in magic.
ALDEN: You're mad.
ALDRICH: Exactly, so the fact that you came to me shows that there’s at least one lingering thought in your mind that magic is reality and reality is magic.
(There’s a moment of silence between Alden and Aldrich.)
ALDRICH: Where have you been seeing the people you mentioned?
ALDEN: Everywhere that Dewin has been.
ALDRICH: Oh no, oh no, no, no.
ALDEN: What is it?
ALDRICH: Dewin is going out with a woman tonight.
ALDEN: Already? He’s only been here for a day.
ALDRICH: He's charming but also so foolish. You must watch them, in case Faley strikes or even worse this woman is working for him.
ALDEN: What could I even do to stop that?
ALDRICH: You are destined to protect Dewin, and at this point your logic for denying all of this is purely irrational. You're not hesitating because you think it’s not real, you're hesitating because you know it is. He is meeting her at six outside of the “Griffin’s Tail”.
ALDEN: I’m not going.
ALDRICH: We both know that you will.
ALDEN: Farewell, Mister Doeth.
ALDRICH: May the spirit of Merlin be with you, Doctor Smith.
(Alden gets up and leaves.)
EXT. LONDON - GRIFFIN’S TAIL PUB - NIGHT
(Dewin stands outside of the pub when Brynn comes out of the side door and walks towards him.)
BRYNN: I wasn’t expecting you to show.
DEWIN: Why wouldn’t I?
BRYNN: Most men flirt and then leave, half of them are married.
DEWIN: They are not true gentlemen then.
BRYNN: I suppose not.
DEWIN: Shall we begin walking?
BRYNN: Sure.
EXT. LONDON - STREETS - NIGHT
(Dewin and Brynn stroll down the streets of London. Alden follows them from a distance.)
DEWIN: This world is so beautiful.
BRYNN: Compared to all the other worlds you’ve been to?
DEWIN: Well Camelot obviously has a better scenic view.
BRYNN: Camelot?
DEWIN: My home land.
BRYNN: You're full of jokes.
DEWIN: I’m not joking.
BRYNN: What?
(Suddenly someone grabs Brynn into an alleyway and she screams. Dewin quickly turns to see no one beside him and runs after her, followed by Alden.)
EXT. LONDON - ROOFTOP - NIGHT
(The clear skies suddenly turn gray and ominous as Dewin arrives on the roof of a building to see three people with glowing purple eyes in the dark purple robes and hoods with one standing in the center holding Brynn with a dagger to her neck. Alden arrives on the rooftop.)
ALDEN: Bloody hell!
DEWIN: Let go of her!
(The three people take off their hoods and their eyes go to normal shades. The person holding Brynn is revealed to be DABRIA (30s), a menacing looking woman.)
DABRIA: Dim mynd i mewn dim dianc.
(A purple hazy force field appears around the edges of the rooftop.)
DABRIA: So you are the one sent to stop us.
DEWIN: What do you connote?
DABRIA: We are the Citadel of le Fay.
DEWIN: Oh no.
DABRIA: Who are you?
DEWIN: My name is Dewin, I am the son of Merlin, and I demand that you let Brynn go.
DABRIA: Why? Is she your protector?
BRYNN: Dewin, what are they talking about!?
(Dewin starts to move his hands around and a wispy blue energy begins to come out of them.)
DABRIA: Get him!
(The two other people with Dabria rush towards Dewin to attack him, but he uses the energy he created to push them around and drop them both to the ground. Dabria drops Brynn and her dagger and Alden rushes to pick up the dagger and succeeds.)
DABRIA: You are foolish, Dewin.
(Dabria pulls a gun out of her robes and shoots it at Dewin but he turns the bullet into a flower. Dabria shoots more but each time Dewin does the same thing until Dabria is out of bullets. Alden sneaks up behind Dabria and stabs her in the back. Dabria shrieks in pain and then disappears in a cloud of black smoke. Brynn gets up off of the ground.)
BRYNN: What the hell just happened?
DEWIN: Are you okay?
BRYNN: Not mentally. What in the world is going on here? How did you turn bullets into flowers!?
DEWIN: I told you I’m from Camelot.
(Alden drops the dagger.)
ALDEN: Did I just kill that woman?
DEWIN: Most likely not, you didn’t stab deep enough to hit any organs.
BRYNN: What do we do now?
DEWIN: Go home and call it a night.
BRYNN: I can’t forget about this.
DEWIN: I’m not asking you to.
ALDEN: If any of us speak of this people think we’re insane.
DEWIN: Then don’t speak of it.
BRYNN: Will I see you again, Dewin?
DEWIN: Did you enjoy tonight?
BRYNN: I was almost killed.
DEWIN: That doesn’t answer my question.
BRYNN: Meet at the pub on Friday after my shift.
INT. TWENTY SIX WICING DRIVE - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
(Alden and Minerva lay next to each other.)
MINERVA: Do you think the Citadel will return?
ALDEN: Unequivocally.
MINERVA: What have we gotten into?
INT. BENJAMIN’S LAIR - NIGHT
(A cavern full of crystals and magical runes. BENJAMIN FALEY (30s or 40s), an attractive but uptight looking man, sits on his throne. Dabria enters and walks to face the throne, she bows and then gets back up.)
BENJAMIN: Did you find him?
DABRIA: Yes, Master Faley.
BENJAMIN: And did you find his protector?
DABRIA: Yes, but it’s not the girl.
BENJAMIN: Then who?
DABRIA: A Doctor Alden Smith.
BENJAMIN: Did you kill the doctor?
DABRIA: He deeply wounded me.
BENJAMIN: Then the battle goes on.
DABRIA: For Morgana.
BENJAMIN: For Morgana.
INT. ALDRICH’S HOUSE - LIVING SPACE - NIGHT
(Aldrich and Dewin sit across from each other drinking tea.)
ALDRICH: There are many things in this world, Dewin…
INT. GWENWYN’S CAVE - NIGHT
(Gwenwyn stands in the middle of a circle of candles. She stretches out her hands and forms magic blue charts and graphs with a picture of Dewin.)
ALDRICH (VOICE OVER): Forces we can’t explain…
EXT. LONDON - ALLEYWAY- NIGHT
(Brynn wears only her undergarments and takes a few coins from a man.)
ALDRICH (VOICE OVER): Secrets we hide…
INT. BENJAMIN’S LAIR - NIGHT
(Benjamin sits on his throne.)
ALDRICH (VOICE OVER): And villains we must defeat.
INT. ALDRICH’S HOUSE - LIVING SPACE - NIGHT
ALDRICH: You are the key to this all, Dewin, you are the son of Merlin.

40 f, 5’3” 113lbs
Please help. I’ve been experiencing sciatic pain for months. I am currently being treated for resistant yeast (vaginal, oral and skin), which began about the same time as this back pain. The pain is primarily located just above the butt crack. At times it is almost overwhelming. I do notice it gets worse when sitting a lot at work. However, it also interrupts my sleep. It seems less painful when standing. It feels like a deep pain and goes into my hips and down my legs, and it makes my legs feel weak. It also feels like it’s triggering my pelvic floor, because when it’s really bad I can feel the vaginal muscles tightening and spasming. I have had CTs, X-rays and ultrasounds that revealed absolutely nothing abnormal aside from slight age related degenerative disc and slight scoliosis in my low spine. My blood work has been relatively normal with the exception of low vitamin D which has been under treatment for a month and a half and elevated leukocytes. I have had multiple STI tests as well due to concerns over the yeast/back pain including HSV, but I’ve been negative on every test now with last point of contact being 3 1/2 months ago. I don’t understand this excruciating intermittent pain. Some days it’s not as bad and maybe I’ll just have a little pain but it’s somewhat manageable and other days like today I don’t even want to get out of bed.

Hi there this is my first post ever and Though this happened a few years a go I feel like i need to write this out for cathartic reasons . so apologies if this is confusing and goes back and forth .
Background : me (28 F) and my S/o , let call him John(29M), have been together 11 years this October, being some what high school sweet hearts we have gone through most and if not all of our major moments in our 20s and now entering our 30s . When we first got together i was fully aware John and His mother dont always get along. And thats putting in nicely . In reality they get in to Full screaming and cussing fits. These can be started from a simple discussion, think "what color is the sky?" and the most unhinged argument would start. MIL is a divorced, awful narcissist who gaslights John and mentally and emotionally abuses both John and his sister , my SIL , we will call her Kelly. My SIL Kelly is also just as bad and if not worse than my MIL in some ways . In the past i tried very desperately to get them to get a long and bury the hatchet , my MIL and SIL would loudly talk about how they loved me and appreciated me and my MIL started calling me her DIL almost 3 months in tot he relationship. (Probbaly Red Flag #12 but i was young and was brought up being told its the most important thing to have your S/O family like you and you do what ever your S/O family ask of you .) Now my SIL being possibly worse than my MIL would be her anger issues on top of her own narcissistic and gaslighting behavior modeled after her mother .SIL also has 3 children by 3 different men, never married and has protection orders agaisst all these men, and dragged all of them to and from court in the same fashion as MIL divorced John and Kelly Father .Also as she had the relationship end with her first Babby daddy we inherited her dog as she couldnt keep him and he is now OUR dog has he as lived with us for almost 8 years now, he is our dog as i pay for his food and all vet needs, he is 100% a house dog and lives happily with all of us and his dog sissters . Over time both MIL and SIL obviously became comfortable and thats when i started seeing their disturbing behavior towards John and his Grandma then later to myself . MIL and SIL have abused Grandma by using her as free child care (Gma is 80) and would berate her and use the Kids against her, if Gma did anything SIL didnt like . By using the kids i mean SIL would send long text messages telling Gma she the worst and worthless, bringing her to Tears and she is banned from seeing the children untill SIL decided shes no longer upset or had no other options . As of Current she is still banded from seeing her grandchildren and we have no idea what she needs to apologize for. Next we escalated to being screamed and kicked out of Christmas Dinner , my MIL stelaing $2,500 from Johns Saving account and stealing Gmas credit card info to use on Amazon orders to just show a few more examples.
Now back ground about story in question: Myself and John found i was pregnant when we were 19 at the time we decided to terminate the pregnancy as we both heavy believe in having children only when we are economically comfortable enough to do so and both agreeing that being so young this was not the time to do this. We both strictly believe in this as we have had many family members pop out children with out any though and that disturbs both of us. Then Going to Plan Parenthood i was told i had an ectopic pregnancy and they then was rushed me to the hospital to schedule my termination . Understand this was a very scary situation for myself as i was told one of my ovaries could be removed and due to the placement fluid was building up and stuck near my hip that caused my to start losing feeling in my leg , but the surgery was scheduled for the next day . Thankfully I had some Great doctors and both my own family and John overwhelmingly supported me during all of this and i didnt have to lose an ovaries . Yay! Now i am actually a pretty private person when it comes to my heath and due to feeling some misplaced embarrassment and shame i asked John to no speak to his mother about this i wanted to keep this between us . He agreed though obviously this was stressful and devastating to us at one point he did confide in his mom for support . At the time i was pretty furious at this but understood that as my family knew and gave us all the support we could ask for i understood he did long for his own mothers support . At the time she was extremally understanding and supportive and was everything John needed emotionally at the time and she respectfully gave me space and didnt bring up any questions. I deeply appreciated this at the time as it was what i needed.
Fast forward to the day in Question: 2020
It was a bad day for me , i was very sick dealing with ,at the time, an undiagnosed Gallbladder disorder that caused sever vomiting and abdominal pain that wasn't corrected untill late 2022, and i went home early with an hour dive back to the home myself and john share with his Gma. When i arrived home SIL and MIL with the kids were at the house just visiting . During this SIL keep speaking about OUR (Myself and Johns Dog ) still being hers. During a moment i was unable to hold my tongue and said something along the lines "well he isnt your dog thats why ." she then screams "YOU BITCH!" in our home in front of the kids . I then promptly and calmly told her " You can leave now . " she then continued to cuss me out but i had blocked most of that out as none of that needed to escalate or be said in front of the kids .At this Point john was also loudly telling both MIL and SIL the leave and they will not speak like that in the house . We were then told we couldnt tell them what to do as it was Gmas home and now ours . I looked and Gma and as she went to say something MIL started screaming at her telling her to "Shut up and mind her business" By this point the argument then escalated to a point of SIL taking the kids out of the house telling us we "are wothless and we could all fuck off ". MIL was still yelling and i couldnt tell you what but then as i loudly told MIL that their behavior was unacceptable and they needed to leave our hosue and SIL behavior infront of the kids was also Unacceptable in this home and since we all live under the same roof we have just as much say in the home as Gma. MIL then proceeded to say "How would you know how to take care of children !" you got rid if yours !' It took everything in my body to not jump over the living room sofa and beat the ever loving shit out of her. I did take a step forward and said "Do you want to repeat that ?" she looked at me in horror, not because of what she said but because she probably saw the rage in my eyes and i was not acting my "normal submissive self " with her so she was not prepared for my response . John then proceeded to tell her to "Get the Fuck out of this house ! How dare she and she was no longer welcome in the home. I couldnt really tell you what i was saying at that time or if i said anything at all after that as i was in a blind rage . She stormed out of the home and slammed our front door. funny part was they left the kids water bottles so she had to come back and knock on the door to get them back. I opened the door tossed them at her and slammed the door so hard in her face the entire front door area shook and almost dropped some frames off the wall.
I apologized to gma as i know i should of held my tonge when they were over but i just couldnt . She told me to not aologize and she is so ashamed of both MIL and SIL behavior and she didnt even know what to say or do to make me feel better. At this time i was unaware i was shaking violently and and tears just free flowing out of my eyes . Both Gma and John did everything they could to comfort me but nothing quiet helped. I think i just disassociated for the rest of the day or else i would if spiraled out of control. We went NC very quickly after this as John couldnt believe that came out of his mothers mouth and was just taken a back and devisated as i was . Gma was still baby sitting and told gma i would never tell her what to do but please dont speak of me over there or anything about my family or me and John. she agreed that was best and kept her promise. though Months later i found out i was still a topic of conversation at MIL and SIL home, about my behavior that day and my "unplanned and outrageous choice to get rid of my child ." Gma came home and explained what was going on to John when i over heard and then suddenly spiraled into a nervous break down . Johna nd Gma came over to calm me and she apologized as she wasnt trying to keep it from me but didnt want to upset me further so she believed telling John was a better what and have him speak to his mother about this but he was also spiraling . after a few days i sent MIL a 4 page educational Fuck you text message and link included so MIL and SIL could better educate themselves as i did not "just get rid of it" i had a medical emergency that could i had last effects on my life. She then responded with no apologies no remorse , just blamed Gma for speaking when she shouldn't and that i "owed her" for being taken to Disneyland (which was a fully planned family trip she invited me to and was upset that John didnt propose to me during trip at disney) and i also "owed " her for her taking me to a doctors appointment. I responded and told her that was the sadest text message i have ever read and that i was so sorry she was just sad narcissitic woman who cant live her life with out blaming the world an her mother for her problems. Going forward MIL and SIL were blocked via phone , and all social medias as i will not allow people like them in my life. John also went NC and he was aware i was sending the message and if he would like he could read it himeself . He politely declined and explained going NC was the best to do as he couldn't stand to look or speak to her anytime in the near future, and with the horrible comments made about me i was allowed to say what ever i wanted to her .
(now since 2020 , we did have an accidental pregnancy around 2022 near the end of covid. All the stress led us to also make the decision to terminate as i was mentally not healthy enough , covid still going on, john lost his job it was another instant where this is not feasible for us, this was a very hard choice for us that put us at the lowest of our relationship and i even had complications after the termination which put me on bed rest for a week. MIL has no knowledge of this as it is not at all her business)
Since the house argument we went NC has been heavily inforced, with the occasional reach out demanding to speak to her son and now her refereeing to Gma by her legal name. SIL forbid gma from seeing the grandkids but will ask John to come see the kids which 9/10 times he declines. It breaks our hearts to not be apart of the kids life's but there is no more fake smiling through their BS . They have stopped by the house less than a handful of times for brisk interactions with the kids . MIL and SIL will try to engage me in conversation but they dont get anything besides the occasional "uhuh " and "oh wow" comments . They reccently invited us to the kids soccer games but sometimes the thought sends me to full blown panic attacks nd melt downs even thinking of engaging with them . I do speak to a therapist about all this and other things in my life, i do suffer from extreme anxiety and depression but as me and John have been getting better financially we have had more relaxed conversations about having kids soon which has brough up a lot of anxiety for me again with some flash backs to mentioned fight with SIL and MIL . They do occasional wiggle back into our lives like this which at times i could care less and other times cant leave my bathroom due to fear. John and myself haven't had much conversation about my anxiety for it lately but if i tell him "No" having to deal with his mother and sister , he never argues , never makes me feel bad for not engaging. He has always been extremally supportive with any of my decisions i make which makes me love him more . I understand that was a lot and i could go on forever about the crazy shit MIL and SIL do with their sad life but i just needed to get this out there . sometimes i think no one agrees with me about their behavior and after losing 2 best friends to ODs and Toxic life styles i dont have really anywhere else to express this emotion or ask for a ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on that isnt my S/O .
Well thats the general story thank you for lasting this long and reading my story today . If you have any questions or comments im happy to reply if anyone has anything to say.

why do I feel like the past was a dream? why do I feel so much pain and sickness waking up and why won't I stop lying to people about being okay?
there's so much I wanna say but don't know where to start
if I open up I start giving random summaries and can't finish what i'm saying I feel like there's a needle in my throat that's expanding in width and length, I get headaches that feel like brain freeze but ache more
whenever I feel sad now my chest hurts so much, the pain reaches my arms, back and legs
if I try holding in tears it's like a headache behind and inside my eye
a while back I was crying and randomly my chest started hurting on the left/middle and it took me an hour to cover a 6 second walk
I don't know what i'm doing I just want an answer, what's the name of my condition

A soldier of a reptilian-analog race lays in his makeshift cot, in a M*A*S*H* tent not terribly far from the front lines. He's lost too much blood, from far too many extraneous holes in his body, and the veins have withdrawn to where doctors can't get an IV into him. They can't save him- they don't even have spare painkillers, so he can feel himself dying the whole while.
It's cold. So very, very cold. His eyes are swollen shut from a godawful mix of biochem weapons that the enemy loves spraying before a banzai charge. This was his first real battle, and it will be his last. He is alone, and he is absolutely terrified, being a young man barely the equivalent of eighteen by human reckoning. Panic starts to set in as he feels himself slipping further and further away. He fidgets and strains against the bedding he's half-swaddled into, emitting shrill noises of distress.
"No.. Not yet.. I don't wanna go yet.. Please..!" Begging to whatever or whoever might hear him, his one still functional arm reaches out and gropes blindly for anything, anyone. He can't stand it anymore. Despair has almost sent him into a full on tantrum when a soft, warm hand grabs his and clutches it tightly. A familiar hand.
"Mama's here, sweetie.. It's okay now. Shh.. Just lay back.. Here, drink this." A cup of something warm is brought to his lips. He immediately relaxes when he hears the voice, and carefully sips at the delicious herbal tea. The slightly savory, slightly fruity flavor and natural chemicals help further calm him. He gasps a bit after the cup is brought away, trying to force his eyes open to look at the familiar, loving voice.
Fatima 'Mama' Basu, one of the human auxiliaries that provided civilian services like treats and gaming to the soldiery. She shouldn't be here, she wasn't even a nurse. But he was glad she was, all the same.
"Mama.. I'm scared, Mama.." His grip on her hand tightened, the shivering growing worse even as he felt her place a heated blanket over him. The warmth was welcome, even if it was just putting ointment on a sucking chest wound.
Another hand began brushing itself over his forehead and the frill that stuck up in the middle, trying to calm his nerves. "I know, sweetie.. And I'm sorry.. Mama will stay right here until the end, I promise." The woman looks at the scales that are coming off of her son's head as she tries to provide gentle physical contact to ease his passing, knowing full well that it means he's close. Tears stream down her cheeks and fall onto his, eliciting a smile from the dying soldier.
"Thank.. Thank you.. Mama.. I just.. Didn't want.. To be.. Alone.." He feels a brief tinge of pain- and then intense relief. A morphine syrette. Where did she get that? It didn't matter. She put it right into a major artery. The pain relief was swift, as fast as his heart was beating. Breathing that had previously been severely labored began to slow and relax, his grip on her hand slowly going slack, and eventually completely limp.
Basu resisted the urge to burst into a full on fit as another one of her precious sons left her. There were still others that needed someone beside them, that needed a nice cup of tea or a decent minced pie or just someone to hold their hand before the lights shut off. She picked up her heavy purse, loaded to the brim with all the little comforts and carefully hidden drugs she could fit into it- almost twenty kilograms- and began looking around the disheveled excuse for a M*A*S*H* tent for the next soul in need.
A bear-like doctor who'd been triaging another patient finished his work and let out a frustrated sigh, looking up and trying not to scream. He saw Basu as she carefully walked around the tent, keeping out of the way of the other medical personnel. "Praise the Forgotten Wood. Mama! Over here!" The human perked up at being called out and scurried over quickly.
She looked down at the soldier the doctor had been treating, most of him was.. Gone. He was some kind of arthropod-analog whose species name she couldn't pronounce, but he was still one of her beloved sons- Srixxir, if she recalled his name correctly. One compound eye twisted itself to look up at her, gently reaching out toward her with a crooked arm that terminated in half as many bristle-haired fingers as it should have normally had. The doctor moved on to the next patient while Basu sat down beside the dying insectoid. She carefully took his hand, ignoring the pain of the bristle-hairs digging into her flesh. "Don't worry, sweetheart. Mama's here.."
"Mama.. Basu.." Srixxir buzzed out, his remaining eye twitching. "Could I.. Could I trouble you for.. One last bite.. Of a.." He didn't even have time to finish making his request before she had one of her minced pies near his triangular mandibles, which began picking at the treat. His absolute favorite food, because she laced his with the nuts from his homeworld that he so loved. Almost as much as he loved this human who followed their army around, providing them with comforts and kindness no matter the danger to herself.
"Tas...t...y..." There was an involuntary shudder, forcing pieces of Srixxir's internal anatomy out through the various holes in his midsection, and he began gasping and choking on his own blood, before his body locked up and went still.
Basu flinched as the bristle hairs bit deep into her skin and carefully unwrapped her hand from Srixxir's rapidly cooling corpse. She'd barely finished putting some liquid stitch on her hand when suddenly a body tackled her to the floor, "MAMA, GET DOWN!" Only then did she notice the whistling sound that was rapidly getting c loser, and she clung to the body that was covering hers. The ground shook and quaked when the artillery shell landed, but when she opened her eyes, everything looked to still be intact.
A pseudo-vulpine with almost absurdly long ears looked down at her with a bit of a grin. "It's okay, Mama. We won't let anything happen to you." He wasn't too badly injured, one of the walking wounded, and he helped her to her feet once the danger had passed.
She ran a hand along the dirty, bloodstained fur of his cheek, smiling back at him, and then proceeded to straighten out his uniform a bit. He might be a junior officer, but he was still an officer, and it wouldn't be proper if he didn't look the part. "Thank you, Krybel. Here.. I made a pork cutlet hand pie, just for you."
The vulpine's eyes gleamed as he resisted the urge to tear into it like a starving pup . After three weeks of shit MREs, one of Basu's hand pies was like a gift from the Gods themselves. He savored every last crumb of it while watching her walk off, looking for the next soul in need.
"Mama.. Mama, where are you??" Came another frightened voice that was starting to crack, making Basu turn toward it on reflex, heart breaking all over again. She hefted up her purse and adjusted the strap.
"Mama's coming, dear, I'll be right there!" She patted Krybel's cheek again, "Take care of yourself sweetie, will you? I'll see you later." And then she began trotting off, moving on to provide the care that only she could.
A senior officer frowned while watching as Basu wandered around his M*A*S*H* unit, providing palliative care. "Lieutenant." He said with a bit of a growl in his voice, looking at Krybel. "Pray tell, who authorized a civilian in my thrice-damned abattoir? Why has she not been removed? Why are you eating one of those damned.. ..delicious..." the officer took a moment to wipe a little drool from his mouth, "...pies?"
Krybel looked up at the officer- a major, probably in charge of the whole camp- and cooly regarded him. "With all due respect to your rank, Major, sir- we want her here and I'm sure that the medical staff has cleared her. Though even if they haven't, I'm going to warn you now, sir- if you even think about trying to take away Mama Basu, you'll be the next one who needs her attention." His face suddenly went from soft and fluffy- if dirty- and went to the hard, stony glare of a predator. "We need her. Allow me to offer the suggestion of, instead of worrying about her, you could focus on something slightly more important. Supply forms, maybe."
The major frowned at this not so subtle threat, but he couldn't lie- at least with her around, there was a little less screaming, so that palliative care was definitely not a waste. And you know, supply forms didn't sound like such a tedious task at the moment.. It was going to be such a long day.

Alright, clickbaity title is over. You can put down the pitchforks.
In no way, shape, or form am I trying to call Blood Manipulation bad here.
What I really mean to say is, in JJK Blood Manipulation's value diminishes the higher your skill ceiling is because most of its moves can be replicated with more versatile Cursed Techniques(Like Ten Shadows).
Almost anything Blood Manipulation can do BY ITSELF can be done through other means, although admittedly some of those aren't accessible to everyone in JJK.
Let's start with the one example directly shown in the series
https://preview.redd.it/3wfnp3s66g1d1.png?width=900&format=png&auto=webp&s=e8eaad05affc625e902fb419d03d5f97166bbfd0
Sukuna recreating Piercing Blood, which is just compression of a fluid then enclosing it while leaving an opening for the pressure to release in a focused beam.
Techniques which I believe to be able to recreate it are as follows:

• Ten Shadows as shown in the series.
• Construction because Yorozu has displayed her liquid metal and the ability to remotely control it which should mean she'd be able to compress it as well.
• Disaster Tides(Unofficial name for Dagon's Cursed Technique) because he directly shown the ability to manipulate it so I'm using the same logic I did with Yorozu.
• Anime Disaster Flames(Another unofficial name), believe it or not, because Jogo could manipulate lava.
• Honorable mention to Ice Formation, Uraume's ice has been shown to melt extremely quickly when Kamutoke was being delivered to Sukuna, much faster than ice should which leads me to believe it was done directly by Uraume.

Simple, right? This logic should also carry over to recreating Supernova, compress and then release.
Now to another application of Blood Manipulation...
https://preview.redd.it/5n3y94vk8g1d1.png?width=900&format=png&auto=webp&s=de9905cdfba771c9feac1fd2772aada267b82208
Where could I possibly be going with this one?
Well, Yorozu's Cursed Technique is "Construction" not "Construct Manipulation" the fact she could remotely control her liquid metal through, and I quote TCB here, "through semi-autonomous cursed energy control" and also the fact Tranquil Deer dispelling Cursed Energy from it made Yorozu lose control over it implies to me it's something that could've been done by anyone sufficiently skilled.
Remote manipulation that is, not Construction itself.
With that Slicing Exorcism and everything in-between has been potentially recreated with things different from Blood Manipulation.
Now for my last example of things which could be potentially replicated by things besides Blood Manipulation
https://preview.redd.it/dc7a83a2ag1d1.png?width=1100&format=png&auto=webp&s=4a692fd776b43b8a1c2f5462f3cc947410b9729b
And just in case someone wants to argue the only reason this worked was because the heart was still mostly intact and it's what was pumping blood instead of his Cursed Energy Manipulation I present to you one of the last panels of Chapter 8
Proof Sukuna can pump the blood without a heart
Now which move am I trying to claim can be recreated with this?
Flowing Red Scale, or at least to an extent.
I miss these wacky translations sometimes
If Sukuna can pump blood at the rate of a regular heart then why couldn't he potentially just use Cursed Energy to accelerate the pulse rate(Which could probably increase the body's temperature by proxy)?
Now that I have slandered Blood Manipulation I should probably mention the thing that only it could do so that people don't raise the Pitchforks again
As shown by the image above, it could control the amount of Red Blood Cells as well as general composition of Blood.
Making Blood Poisonous to Cursed Spirits which Kamo mentions in Sakurajima Colony
Choso having his detached arm STILL FUNCTIONAL ENOUGH to grab Kenjaku
That same arm being reattached
Yuji reattaching his leg after getting it cut off by Sukuna's Domain
Reattaching limbs is still pretty good because it SHOULD by all means cut down on Reverse Cursed Technique cost and difficulity.
Ishigori mentions in Sendai Colony that recovering lost limbs is difficult even with Reverse Cursed Technique
And no, I obviously don't count Choso and Yuji(After eating the remaining Death Paintings) using Cursed Energy to recover Blood as part of Blood Manipulation because that's due to their partial Cursed Spirit nature, but I figured I'd mention this in case someone somehow wanted to bring it up.
But it is an effective combo for Blood Manipulation due to the aforementioned limb reattachment.

Financial aid officers, please look at my letter and let me know if it is appeal acceptance worthy, and what changes I should make that'll benefit my chances. I have placed underscores on specifics for privacy reasons.
SAP Appeal Letter
Dear Student Finance Appeal faculty, staff, and team,
I hope this summer break has been warm and smooth sailing for you. It has come to my attention that I do not meet the “Satisfactory Academic Progress” and I may become ineligible for student financial aid. This would be because of my record of withdrawing or failing classes these past fall and winter semesters, causing my inability to reach the 67% of hours needed to fulfill. In this letter, I plan to openly express my reasons for failing to meet your standards and how I plan to meet and strive to reach even further in hopes of your kindness and consideration.
On ____________ a Friday night, my family and I became victims of a major car accident. Thankfully my family was left with only deep bruises and cuts. However, on my end, I needed major surgery ______ due to having a displaced, femoral shaft fracture. I missed out on almost a month of school, just months before my high school graduation. Two months later, I visited the ______________________'s campus to decide on where to attend university. Initially, I thought that my healing progression would be manageable by the time I started the fall semester, but I was wrong. My physical therapy, which should’ve been a 1-year journey, was cut down to only three months because I decided to participate in ________(Summer Classes in person at school ). Because of the school’s elevated campus, filled with endless stairs and uphill walking, I was left with painful and energy-draining walks to classes for the entirety of my first semester. It came to a point where the pain and mental distress made it extremely difficult to attend my classes, therefore where my decision to drop classes came in.
During winter break, I had a follow-up check-up with my orthopedic doctor, where I discovered that I had refractured my femur due to my physical activity on campus. He advised that I avoid stress on my leg, which was impossible. Again, this led to difficulty in fully attending and focusing on my courses during the winter semester. Some classes were easier to reach than others, such as walks to ______________where the walk is mostly flat, compared to a walk to_______________, where I’d have to walk uphill and go over several sets of stairs, which led to the downfall of my grades. The pressure of being a student abroad while also being someone whom people back home have high expectations of, my performance led to a decline in my mental health.
Due to these reasons, I decided to retake the dropped courses this Summer through ________________ since they are online. I’m also pushing my admission to the nursing program by a semester to catch up on classes and improve my GPA. To further ensure that my academic performance will not be interfered with moving forward, I’ve just recently gotten checked, and now I am 100% healed according to my doctor. This means that I should have no more physical trials holding me back from achieving academic success from now on. I’ve discussed my academic plan with my advisor, and she is quite understanding of my situation and supportive of the way I wish to go through my academic career. As a student studying at ________________ to only achieve a nursing associate, it is difficult to reach a certain number of credits without being a part of the nursing program because of the small number of classes needed. So, I kindly ask for your patience as I gradually increase my credits and improve my academic performance to meet your standard academic progress. My family is still in the process of paying the bills that we’ve been charged with since the accident, so my financial aid is extremely crucial to aiding in our financial situation. I kindly ask you to please consider my appeal.
Along with the appeal form and this letter, I’m providing documentation that proves my integrity and proof of my medical statements.

Where do I begin. For the purpose of this post, I will use fictious names and locations as it is ongoing, and out of respect (even though she doesn't deserve any)
My name is Daniel. I am 35 years old, and i am dying. I have a disease called systemic sclerosis. I am currently on a supplemental disability plan, until I get approved for SSI (social Security). Until then, my income is about 4K a month. I own a home but after child support and bills, NOT INCLUDING gas, food, haircuts, medical appointments, and or emergencies like my fridge just broke. (which i never go out) I am left with $260 that has to last me a month. I also have three children who I have to take care of half the time per the 50/50 agreement.
Recently, I found out my oldest, (who is 13) is not biologically mine. I decided to look into it as I had concerns for a while since my divorce as her cheating was very rampant. I also had caught her in 2017 with a man in my house, which is what prompted the divorce. But FL being a no fault state, doesn't matter. I also had to pay child support since the beginning and WHILE LEGALLY Married since 2010 because she had applied for financial support like food stamps and government assistance then. I know what your thinking. Why didnt you stop it then? I tried. You cant take yourself off child support. I also never grew up with a father and wanted that two-parent household. I don't run from responsibilities, like he did. Its how I was raised. Anyways, I married her, tried to do the right thing, she lied numerous times. she never worked, and I worked 90 plus hours a week. To look into her cheating, was impossible at the time as I was never home. and to busy providing for my family.
fast forward to now. My disease started to become worse and over three years; it didn't reveal itself until last year fully to actually pinpoint what this was. for instance, I had in 2019 pain behind my eyes and horrible headaches to the point that I thought I had MS. following year, I had trouble swallowing for 3 months. next year itching in the skin for three months. But prior, I had visited various doctors to see what was going on, each time a flare up then would last 3 to four months, which again, when you don't understand what's going on, you need to take time off to go see doctors, run tests, but this illness was and still is very elusive. with that being said I had 5 jobs since its first flare up till last year to continue to support my family and to pay child support. as of last year. I'm having trouble moving on certain days, breathing and acid reflux and muscle atrophy. (disease progression) especially when this is going on, it worsens everything as this is flared up. I was working under the table to try and make ends meet as I was paying child support still. I should add that the child support with 50/50 custody was $1029 for three kids cause I was making six figures at the time of divorce in 2018. Last year however, I couldn't work anymore, and filed for disability.
In june of last year, I had asked Susan, to get the children school supplies, (which she never does) as I was still paying at the time $1029 in child support. She said she didnt have the money despite now making 70k and her new BF living with her and is working whom she cheated on me with. With me working under the table, I bought them clothes, haircuts, school supplies (ive done every year) but then, I noticed she went on vacation to puerto rico and got a giant leg tattoo. At the time, I had already known what I had, and I asked myself why the heck am I doing this? So i turned to an attorney to get it modified. Again, this is June 20th to be exact of last year. My lawyer, stated that this was only going to be a 90 day turn around for the temporary modification then we will go for the final.
Since then, I have gone for a DNA test. I had to know. I am dying. I wanted to know. And you may judge me for this. but i have filed for disablement for paternity, meaning I am removing myself from the birth certificate. However, in the state of Florida, a mother can deny this and so can the courts. before you judge me, I have many reasons none of which have to do with him other then his mental disability (Aspergers) This illness, as days go by takes more and more from me. As previously aforementioned, I am left with 250 a month. I cannot go get a drs appointment pay for groceries or start planning my funeral which I will start making payments on soon. He also eats three times the amount that we all collectively do (Not his fault) but I have paid enough both mentally and financially. He also has trouble communicating as my suspicions is, that he was born of incest (gross) which is why I was 'chosen' to be his father at the time. Before you ask how do you know? Lets just say she had an uncle 'leave' during that time.
anyways, in February, I had the temporary modification hearing for child support and needless to say it was a circus. My doctor was subpoenaed to be there by my attorneys request to better my argument, even though I felt we didn't need her, she advised me to have my doctor there. Well, he attorney attacked my doctor and me for an hour and 40 mins when the court case was only supposed to go for an hour. He said "you saw another dr Max so and so and they said it was all in your head" (again I had flare ups on a illness that hadnt revealed itself correctly since last year). So there argument was that I was doctor seeking to avoid child support. After I have paid for 13 years never missing a payment. Her lawyer also targeted people who are living with me. Now I'll admit that I said they were friends which is true but how else can I pay for my attorney? Cant work, cant sell drugs, cant rob a bank? So they want to take there income into consideration. BS. She also hired a private investigator to watch me exercise outside and stated that because I can exercise, I can work..... Ok. Where's the 23 hours of the rest of the day watching me in pain. or when do you have me on video of a flare up from this terminal illness? (that's what I wanted to say)
Although I was granted the temporary modification, of $209, I left the court thinking wow, this woman can cheat, commit paternity fraud, not give two craps about our children, live with her mom in a section 8 home, and here I am doing whatever I can and I've done nothing wrong but be lied to and this is how my government, my country treats me? No wonder men my age dont have children this is insane. The paternity issue wasn't even brought up they said that this isnt the place for this and that the disestablishment will be another trial for those wondering. My lawyer only spoke for 5 mins. Asking her about her income cause thats the only thing that has changed since 2018 since she didnt work at the time. Other than that, it was an attack on me and my disease arguing my ability to work.
after leaving that, I didnt eat for 96 hours. I have since been crying nonstop. Compilating suicide. I am already heart broken about my son not being mine. Sure does a terminal illness make me said, no question everyday. But a life wasted on another? Cause I decided to be a man and take up responsibility? thats soul crushing. And to say "well, there is a big chance the courts will deny your request' thats BS. If i go to prison because I was accused of a robbery for 13 years, and DNA evidence proves I wasnt there, I get out of jail and can sue. This is no different. If anything, DNA evidence needs to be more of a factor in family law than in almost every court of law if not as equally important. My bad for not investigating her infidelity not only in the beginning but also in the end. How about not being a POS. sorry rant over
gets better. Her mom and dad smoke in the section 8 house, kids reek of cigarette smoke and marijuana, all day. they dont take showers there, they were hand me down clothes, they live in the garage shared with there mother, that isn't air conditioned. and he makes only a few thousand less than I do a month. She stated in court that she pays her mom $500 in rent which is BS, she is only doing that now so that she makes herself look bad. I know she is doing pills, like oxy and what not. Id love to prove it.
after the temp hearing, in april, I had to go to court to contest my drivers license suspension as I hadn't paid child support since, august of last year. again, there is no way, I can pay my bills, feed my children, go to the doctor, pay my lawyer to end all of this BS and pay the current child support amount. and again, this final hearing is still not set yet. So they intercepted my tax return, even though the temporary modification was approved, the final is what gets it retro backed to the date of filing, so they took, a much needed 5500 tax return from me. I needed that cause one of the issues I failed to mention as well, hurricane Ian has destroyed my home and I'm still going through that process too. not to mention I am on payment plans with Mayo clinic and other various medical facilities. (no one cares) but the interest that accrues, makes it impossible to catch up. also, Florida department of rev is overstepping I feel, and asking for medical info to be sent to them as well as updated doctors letters to be sent saying that I am still on disability.
a few weeks ago, I got an email from my lawyer having a withdrawal notice from her lawyer. in the withdrawal, he stated that he cannot represent her, due to something she may have withheld or lied about (more or less wasn't worded like that but you can tell). In feb court appearance they never produced the PI report, or videos, they had medical info they shouldn't have had, and they had very outlandish comments about my lifestyle. So my lawyer filed immediately a motion to compel. meaning, we want to see everything you have on my client. this was filed almost immediately after court appearance on feb 20th. Susan has failed to provide any updated info requested by my attorney so on june 18th, we have that upcoming hearing.
in the mean time, I have sent my lawyer, a very heavily requested topics, such as "where did they get my medical records, if those were lies, what are the consequences if any"? What did exercising have to do with any of this despite various drs saying he has to or he will get worse.
I know wat you must be thinking, what about your oldest, how can you do that to him. Please listen. This woman has taken everything from me. And i mean everything but the roof over my head. I am seeing a therapist to help with the suicidal thoughts. it isnt enough. the reality of it is, I chose to be loyal and it bit me in the butt. This disease will rob me of everything, my teeth will fall out ( I had 5 cavities last time I went to the dentist) I haven't had a cavity since I was 30 and even then I was suspicious. And I am brushing 5 time s a day to save them. My skin is tightening, and my arms and muscles are wasting. I will literally be left with nothing. My organs will also start to harden, and I will have to start getting around the clock care.
I forgot to mention they (child support) recently, sent a letter to SSI (social security) saying that they would garnish my SSI before I even got it, totaling $1029. the incorrect amount. I sent this to my lawyer and she is looking into it. But it shows that child support will overstep and breaks every law or freedom you may think you have. I DO take care of my children. if they need a haircut i do it, school supplies clothes, anything I do it. And I do it, cause she wont. What I want to leave you with, is that woman can be dead beats too. Child support was designed to have woman off of government subsidized programs like section 8 food stamps and what not. Also to make the man pay for their children man or woman I should say, I know this. I am not running from my obligation. I just want Susan, to have to pay for what's she's done to me and the kids.
I would like to hear your thoughts on this, please comment and share, all names are fake, but everything else is unfortunately real. I know it was wordy, but I wanted to provide as much backstory as possible. And please. Respect my descions. When you are end of life, I hope someone would be kind enough to respect yours. You may not agree and that's ok, but I am asking you to respect them. Thank you for reading.

A few quick disclaimers before I start:

1. I'm going to be talking about their show counterparts. Things are different enough in the books that some of the points wouldn't apply, or wouldn't apply as much.
   
2. Of course Viserys treated Rhaenyra the best of his children. I'm not going to dispute that at all.
   
3. I do think he loved Rhaenyra. It's the way he expressed that love and was willing to use his child that I'm going to discuss.
   

We often joke (and I certainly take part) that Viserys loved Rhaenyra so much that she may as well have been his only child. And yes, he certainly did love her, but in his love, he made her into a symbol and the solution for his problems, rather than seeing her as an individual and a human being.
First, there's his fundamental unwillingness to try and see or even understand her point of view. He doesn't discuss his engagement to Alicent at all, despite the fact he knew how close the two girls were, and I don't think he was foolish enough to think it wouldn't effect their friendship. He just announced it and expect Rhaenyra to go along with it and be good with it, without thinking how it might hit her.
Second, there's the supposed freedom in picking her husband he offers her initially. Viserys thinks he's doing her a favor; instead, it's one of the many times he sets her up for failure. Once again, he fails to see the trauma that Aemma's death left on his daughter. One of the last conversations Rhaenyra has with her mother, Aemma tells her that soon enough she'll be in Aemma's position, in the birthing bed. Aemma then dies in childbirth, and while I don't think Rhaenyra knows the full extent of what happens, she would have known it would be incredibly painful. Rhaenyra also knows that her grandmother, Alyssa, also died from childbirth, and her maternal grandmother Daella ... yes. Also died from complications due to childbirth. Her whole legacy has been women who died while giving birth, and not once that Viserys try and reassure her that things would be okay. He leaves a scared young woman alone and tells her to pick a husband.
Why isn't telling her to choose her own husband the gift people think it is? Because he offers absolutely zero political guidance. This would be the perfect time for him to sit Rhaenyra down and discuss not only the men, but what marrying them would offer the realm or discuss how it would effect the realm politically. Throwing her to the wolves won't work; of course the teenager scarred by maternal trauma isn't going to be able to make a choice. Also, she's a teenager. Expectations for her age may be different than they are for modern day teens, but that doesn't change the fact that she's got teen brain.
Involving Rhaenyra politically (or lack thereof) is my third point. The effort Viserys made was half-hearted at best. Rhaenyra serves as cup bearer, and then it seems like she has some small role on the small council, but it's not clear what the extent of it is and whether or not it's something she gets to do all the time, or just when Viserys was sick. We're given nothing to indicate he's guiding Rhaenyra and involving her in long term planning or discussion of impactful choices; once again, it seems like he expects her to sit there and make all these choices without the equipment to properly do so.
Then there's Rhaenyra as balm to his mistakes, the sacrificial lamb. He loves his daughter, but he holds her at arm's length, and he uses her because that's the form his love seems to take with all the women in his life. When Viserys marries Alicent and damages the Velaryon relationship to house Targaryen, it's Rhaenyra who has to repair it by marrying Laenor. There were other actions Viserys could have taken to try and fix that gap, but he instead makes Rhaenyra fill it.
He appoints her heir, an act of love, but also an act of devotion to Aemma. Rhaenyra is an extension of Aemma in his eyes, but when she acts in ways that Aemma presumably wouldn't, Viserys lashes out and chastises her. There's an expectation of perfection it seems, without giving the guidelines of what form that perfection takes. I think people really underestimate how blind Rhaenyra was flying into the whole situation. Yes, she has a tendency to be naive about her path forward, but why wouldn't she be? She's thrown to the sharks and told if she just swims hard enough, she'll be fine and the sharks will love her.
The relationship between the two is no doubt incredibly complex, but we have to give it to our man Viserys- the way that he loves people is never for their own benefit. Sorry for rambling, but I've had these thoughts for a while and wanted to lay them out on the page.

Are you sick of me yet? 🤦
I am an avid and regular exerciser, not a marathoner currently but I warm up with a 5k or equivalent before an hour gym workout, can spend a day on moguls skiing, put out 150 floors on stair climber no issue. Working on one legged box jumps and unsupported pullups (I'm female). Not not not at all to be at all boastful in any sort of manner since there's always someone stronger, faster fitter, but to give background.
I've kept up my routine since my recent TN bout/flare whatever that started 6 weeks ago, because I've noticed that I don't get the high pain level flares at the gym. This is as I've added carbamezapine and up to 1800 mg gabapentin to my day to day to try to get on top of pain management (when I'm not exercising, anyway).
My PCP switched me over from gaba to Lyrica (pregablin ) to see if I could get better relief, which I began this morning (25mg doses). I have had about the most miserable, high level pain day today since I've started this 6 weeks ago, which I attributed to the med switch. Anyway since everything hurt, walking breathing talking closing my mouth, and laying down always makes it worse, I came to the gym this afternoon. About 20 minutes into a cardio workout I started getting some pretty specific, left sided chest pain. I checked my heart rate and it was on my usual cardio level (165-170 bpm) - this is a very typical high intensity exercise heart rate for me that I sustain for long periods, usually. But it never hurt my heart before. I did finish another 10 minutes on the cardio machine, lowering intensity to not heart hurting levels.
If you made it this far: *Are you an exerciser that has experienced the same issues with pregablin?

• Have you noticed trouble switching from gaba to Lyrica (pregablin)?

*Have you had a side effect like this go away?
(Yes I will call my PCP in that morning and talk to her. Pinging here the people who know personally!)

You never know the pull of a small town until you trade your entire life to live in one.
Dazzling city lights made way for grassy fields blanketed in soft sunsets, local papers filled with names I knew by heart. When the honeyed hair of the local florist came out in patches due to the stresses of life, sixty people brought steaming bowls of food to ease the ache. A singular church brought the townsfolk together, and perhaps that was the most foreign part of it all to me.
I was a kid, so I watched the entire thing unfold through the innocent lens of child, keenly watching the camaraderie of this town really peak outside the doors of that church. It didn’t look like much, a steepled dream imagined by the townsfolk of before, but it meant everything to the people. I even understood that back then, even though I didn’t quite buy the concept of a god yet.
The Sundays were a monotonous part of our week, only pedalled by my parents who desperately wanted to fit in with the town’s culture. They wore their masks well, nodding in the right places as we sat in the same pew every time, my father often discreetly checking the football scores in the sleeve of his jumper. Nothing ever happened in that tiny town, and then everything happened all at once.
It started with the miracles. Our pastor, Pastor Jon, liked to have the troubled souls of that week sitting in the front row so he could clutch their shaking hands one by one, channelling the energy of God through him in the hope that someday, hope could be brought to those lacking in it. It was a brief affair, usually just the joining of skin and a short prayer, but that Sunday was different. Rain hammered against the roof, leaving Pastor Jon’s prayers lost in the low, threatening rumble of thunder.
It meant when the sun shone through the clouds and caressed the face of a pained Wilson Brewster, it already felt a welcome intrusion.
“May your broken leg heal quickly,” Pastor Jon smiled warmly, steeling a hand on the calf of the waiting boy.
He, like me, was just a child. He didn’t feel the urgency of the situation, he was probably only grateful his throbbing leg wasn’t pulsating with pain anymore. He breathed a quiet ‘cool’ and that would have been that, had his parents not asked exactly what was cool about his leg being touched later that night. The news spread like wildfire - as per the medical centre, his parents said, Wilson Brewster no longer had a broken fibula.
There was some debate, of course. My parents mumbled in the kitchen about how clearly he’d never had a broken leg, and how odd to make him hobble around in a cast if that was the case. The sentiment was echoed tenfold, until something a little more tangible happened that changed the course of that town, and our lives, forever.
Pastor Jon didn’t mean for the glass to shatter in his hand during service, nor did he mean for a chunk of it to embed itself in his palm, gushing reams of blood racing down his arm in a bid for the floor.
“Gross!” one of the kids shouted with glee, the rest of us paling as crimson spilled from his wound. He was a deer in the headlights, utterly unprepared as we all looked on in awe. This was not how church usually went - this was quite the deviation. Several people stood to help, but they needn’t have bothered, because the divine was ready to intervene.
“Oh dear,” Pastor Jon muttered in a panic, using his bloodied hand to block the intense ray of sunlight threatening to stream through the glass into his eyes. It bathed the blood in a golden glow, and quicker than it had gone in, the chunk of glass began to slide from the wound till it smashed to the floor, exploding into a million pieces. That was not the crescendo, though, rather it was the sight of his skin tightening and knitting together - months of work in a moment - blood congealing and leaving behind nothing but memories of a wound.
“Pastor?” Mary-who-makes-the-blueberry-pies breathed, reaching out to touch him with bulging eyes. Pastor Jon could only open and close his mouth uselessly, his voice barely coming out in a whisper when he did finally speak.
“It’s a miracle,” he wheezed, and by all accounts, I suppose it seemed it was.
I was young, but I remember the bustle - the town was as I’d never seen it. The people of the church had vowed to keep it our little secret because, as Pastor Jon said, we had been given a gift and it was not appropriate to turn it into a spectacle. This gift was sporadic, though. People queued through the double doors of that church, sobbing and praying for their own slice of God, but few were to be given it. Little Laurie Lee and her dislocated jaw cleared up within the hour. Farmer Noel had a sudden epiphany about what the lottery numbers were to be.
Our town was blessed.
For two days, we marvelled. The rest of the world can have a piece later, we reasoned, but this was for us, just for now.
The church was fuller than it had ever been, people spilling out into the back and waiting with baited breath, snippets of conversations could be heard, and as they had been for the last two days, they all echoed one another.
“-a believer. I mean, Aunt Lillian said it was the light. The light closed up his wound, there and then!”
“-jaw. I saw her get hit with the cricket bat! Terrible thing, little lamb was inconsolable. And then next thing I know, she comes here and those shards are just welded back together again! Well, I told Janie-”
“-need to make the church bigger. Look at everyone! If only-”
So when Pastor Jon stood before us practically trembling with glee, it was hardly the weirdest thing that had happened all week. His voice was thick with emotion, eyes darting manically around our congregation.
“I have a message,” he breathed, and the crowd gasped at the connotation of it. I remember my father swearing, a low rumble of expletives I didn’t usually hear falling from his lips. I didn’t fully understand what this meant, but the atmosphere in that room morphed in a heartbeat.
“Tell us,” Christie Baker cried, hands clasped as tears welled in her eyes, “Oh, please tell us!”
Pastor Jon visibly shook, holding a trembling hand outstretched as if to reach us all. “He came to me last night,” a single tear raced past his cheek and made a home on his lip, “He spoke to me.”
“Praise God!” a man cried from next to me, and I shuffled closer to my father at the sudden burst of noise.
“It is… Him,” Pastor Jon uttered in a blissful exhale, sending the room bursting into chaos. Tears, cheers and prayers filled the space, but my father just clutched me tighter and my stomach churned uncomfortably. It took at least ten minutes for the room to quieten, but when it did, he had their rapt attention. “I am told that I will be His vessel. I will pass on what must be passed. We are not to spread the word, yet - only our pocket of civilization is ready. Only ours.”
You could replicate what happened a thousand times, and somebody would mess it up, sending a message of the divine to their great aunt in Auckland. But not us. That secret stayed within the confines of our town for the sixteen days hell shined upwards at us. Everybody had a thousand questions, but Pastor Jon only hushed us. “You must trust me,” he said, tone more regal than I’d ever heard it. And trust him the people did.
So on the second day when he returned to church and his eyes were dark-rimmed, nobody questioned it. He was chosen. Who knows what that does to a person’s sleep cycle? The following day when he went for his morning walk and the smile didn’t quite reach his hollow eyes, that was fine. He was a vessel, not a performer. And then that morning at church when he addressed us and kept rubbing the angry red welts on his wrists, who were we to ask questions of God’s messenger?
Nothing went terribly wrong until the baptisms. We all wanted to be part of this - even my anxious parents who signed me up to be bathed in holy water - and so we queued towards the front of the church, eager to hand ourselves over. I was second in line, right behind Mrs Awkins who had been the school nurse for the last 26 years, apparently. She was gleeful as Pastor Jon set up, speaking rhymes I barely listened to as I bounced on the balls of my feet, eager to go next. My stomach flipped at the words, knowing that my turn was only seconds away. People wouldn’t usually queue, but this was different. It was all different, now.
“I baptize you in the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.”
I didn’t expect the awful fizzing noise the liquid made as it hit Nurse Awkins’ head, nor did I expect the guttural wail that fell from her lips as she clawed at her own scalp. Smoke billowed up from her disappearing tresses and as I was yanked backwards, I caught a glimpse of her exposed skull. Most people will go their entire lives without the smell of burning flesh lingering in their nostrils, but not me.
“I- No! That wasn’t- oh!” Pastor Jon had cried, tired eyes bulging out of his head as people leapt to their feet to assist.
It was carnage, but not carnage I witnessed for long. My mother’s grip on my arm was vice-like, her eyes swimming with terror I know still plagues her to this day. I recall my father on the walk home, murmuring to my mother in low tones I wasn’t meant to hear.
“This isn’t right, Rach’. Jesus, did you see her? That was almost our son!”
My mum’s voice was shrill, the sound of her heels clacking against the pavement not quite masking her voice. “The police will be called - we don’t even know if she’ll survive! I think I’m going to throw up.”
But she was wrong on both counts. She didn’t throw up and the police weren’t called, because we rallied together. This was bigger than us and bigger than Mrs Awkins. Sure, nobody else tried to get baptised, but this was a blip. People surmised that the almighty didn’t want her as part of his flock, that she hadn’t been a believer when it mattered. Nobody was to utter a word about it, and because church was every morning now, my parents were almost too scared not to go. As a child, I didn’t understand it, but all these years later, I think I’d have bent to the fear of the almighty as well.
But it wasn’t the almighty who knocked on the door.
It became all the clearer that morning when Pastor Jon turned up with eyes so sunken and empty that we startled at his presence.
“Pastor.. Pastor, are you feeling alright?” one of our neighbours fussed, “Will you be okay for service?”
Pastor Jon didn’t answer. It was almost as though he didn’t hear her as he dragged his feet up to the front, turning so slowly towards us that it almost felt eerie. A large, jagged and bloodied cut spanned the entire back of his neck, disappearing behind him as he eyed us all, one by one.
“He’s here,” he murmured, words that on paper, should have sent the entire church reeling with joy. But you could hear a pin drop. You could hear any soul whisper in the large room, and yet his utterance only caused goosebumps to spread across my skin as a sort of icy stillness washed over me.
“He’s… here?” a woman in the front row asked, and Pastor Jon took too long to answer. An unnatural, slow smile spread across his face as he tilted his head towards the source of the noise. He didn’t respond, instead slowly lifting his hand to his lips, letting his finger linger there for a moment. When nobody spoke, he let his mouth fall open and began to chew loudly on the finger, drawing gasps from the crowd.
“Don’t look,” my mother shimmied closer to me and lifted a trembling hand to my eyes, but I could see through the cracks in her fingers. Pastor Jon continued to sloppily chew his finger, eventually snapping his head up and inhaling sharply as he spat blood out of his mouth.
“Your bodies are so fragile,” he sneered, lifting his dripping finger to the skies, causing several people to leap from their seats and make a bolt for it. My mother was one of them, and with horror, I watched as the Pastor’s eyes scanned the room and locked onto mine, tilting his head. “Stay,” he hissed with bared, bloody teeth, and we did. Not through choice, but rather, a sickening whoosh of air that skimmed past our faces and forced us all back down.
“What’s going on?” someone shrieked, but we weren’t to know, not really.
Pastor Jon only smiled blissfully, reaching his arms outwards as if to accept us. “I’ve come to bless you all,” he whispered mockingly, fingers outstretched as the sun hit the stained glass to the left of him. But it was all wrong. Sunshine streamed in and as it hit the red of a decorated sunrise, an image which had been there years before us, the colour changed. It was only moments until the church had the appearance of being bathed in blood, shimmering red bouncing off every surface to create the illusion we were all swimming in hell.
Nobody spoke.
Those who didn’t quite make it to the doors stood frozen; we who remained in our seats cowered in the heaviest kind of fear. Red drowned us and we clutched one another, eyeing Pastor Jon as though he were a wild animal. Finally, someone dared speak.
“Where is God?” he murmured, eyes swimming. Pastor Jon’s neck snapped towards him as he licked the blood from his finger, shuddering. When he spoke, his words were cold, distant. As though they were from somewhere else entirely.
“He hasn’t been around for a while.”
There was no time for his words to punch at my stomach, because in no time at all Pastor Jon was crumpled on the floor, wailing as he regarded his chewed, bloody finger. The bone was exposed and yet nobody helped him as he looked at us pleadingly, too many eyes on him as his whimpers turned to whispers. When he spoke, we listened.
“You need to keep coming to church,” he breathed, a single, bloody tear trickling down his cheek, “It will be worse if we don’t.”
So we did.
The Sunday Fair was cancelled, and pies that had been baked to share in sunny gardens went stale and grew mould. People packed duffel bags and made for their cars, arguing fiercely with those who decided to stay. My mother and father disagreed, but their argument was far more muted.
“Please, we have to go,” my father pleaded, shaking his head as I watched from the shadows, “Listen, I don’t know what the fuck that was-”
“I can’t explain it,” her voice was shaken, quiet, “But I know it will be worse if we go. I know it. Please just trust me. Trust Jon.”
So as my father always did, he believed in my mother. Each day in church was torturous, everyone sitting rigid with fear as Pastor Jon read slowly and shakily from the bible, bruises littering his gaunt body. When the holy book in his hands would launch into flames, he’d calmly drop it into the bucket of water he’d prepared and retrieve a new one. One time, every window in the church smashed and we all winced, ducking to avoid the onslaught of glass.
Darkness watched us.
We all felt it, and I know it visited members of the flock in the shadows. I was plagued by it one particularly torturous night as I lay in bed, blanketed in darkness with the covers pulled up to my chin. I hadn’t been able to shake the feeling I was being stared upon, squeezing my eyes shut as laboured, wet breaths left my body. But they weren’t my breaths.
I’d realised it straight away, that my hurried gasps for air didn’t match the gargling, strangled heaving that echoed around my head. From under the covers, I didn’t know much, but I knew one thing - the uncomfortable, heavy presence laying on my legs was my only source of comfort. Through all this, I reasoned, that if my beloved dog was with me, hell itself couldn’t come and claim me.
But I was wrong, because outside, my dog howled into the night.
Terror like that wasn’t something I’d felt before, and as my stomach bottomed out, I stopped breathing altogether. It must have sensed my fear, because those gargling breaths heaved closer and closer to my face as it dragged itself up my body, inch by inch. The smell of rot and ash burned into my nostrils, a horrific weight settling above my nose as my lungs started working again, so quickly that I would surely die then and there. If it had a face, it was twisted and pressed into mine, the thin bedcover my only source of protection.
But I couldn’t scream. I couldn’t move, so I let it pant gravelly air into my face, let it lay on top of me for hour after hour, till the birdsong indicated morning had come. All night I sobbed stifled cries, chest shaking as I squeezed my eyes shut and felt it pressing into me. Felt it hating me, felt it wanting to rip its claws into my stomach and pull out my intestines. But it didn’t. And when I awoke late the next morning - I must have passed out through fear alone - it was gone.
The rest is all a bit of a trauma-soaked blur, to be honest. I know my parents couldn’t understand why I wasn’t speaking the next day, why I barely reacted when evil finally descended that morning at church. The rest of the townsfolk screamed for their lives, ran as fast as they could, but I just stared with a hollow, broken gaze. As the rivers of blood waterfalled down between the pews, I watched Pastor Jon’s eyes grow dark as midnight, empty and soulless as he bellowed inside those four walls and called upon something worse than any of us could likely ever imagine.
I recall the fire starting, remember Pastor Jon’s slack jaw as he regarded us all so horribly, moving jaggedly towards my family with a growing demonic, gleeful grin.
“I remember you from last night,” he’d uttered darkly, but his voice came out in a thousand jarring layers and I could see hell in his eyes.
“Leave us alone!” my father tried to shield us, lifting a crucifix and wielding it towards Pastor Jon as though it would protect us. He simply laughed, an awful noise of horrific dissonance that I still sometimes hear alone in my bed at night. In complete horror, my parents could only watch as this thing wrenched the crucifix from my father’s hand, grinning as his jaw split and shattered each second he opened it impossibly wider. The sound of his bones cracking reverberated as his skin split and his mouth gaped, wide enough to drop the crucifix right into his waiting, blood-soaked mouth and swallow it, right in front of us.
When he met our gaze, his broken jaw hung limply from his face, sad morsels of skin stitching a once-good man together. Whatever blur those hours were, that, I remember.
It was an anti-climax, really, because while I expected him to descend upon us all and rip us into thousands of pieces, he simply boomed his words, jaw still hanging as his evil spoke directly into our souls.
“When I return in 20 years, it is not just your small town that will bleed.”
Pastor Jon has been missing for 20 years. I’m not sure when he started his countdown, but I awoke this morning with a dread so sickening that I’ve barely stopped emptying my stomach. If it’s over and the earth turns to rubble, I hope somebody finds this and can at least piece together why it all came to a sad, premature end. We townsfolk kept our vow of quiet for this long, but there comes a point when silence is deadly.
I think today, Pastor Jon will be found.

I wanted to see if anyone else has experienced shakiness in their legs or arms after exercise or minimal work (does not have to be exercise). I believe this might be called exercise intolerance. I will say I probably have not worked out for about a year, but I noticed if I squat or lift my legs up while laying down my legs will feel pretty shaky. I do not need to hold these positions long to feel this way either.
I guess im trying to confirm is this what is known as exercise intolerance or does it sound more like clonus. I’ve seen videos of clonus and I feel like I don’t shake anywhere near as hard but notice when engaging muscles more so in my legs im not able to “hold still” like other people might be able to with minimal exertion. If you were to tell me to hold some type of pose you will probably notice some part of my body not able to stay still although it is not dramatic as seen in clonus.
After walking up and back down a flight of stairs to sight see the other day my legs basically felt super shaky as if I just did leg day. It was at least 300-400 steps so I’d imagine I’d feel tired, however when comparing to my gf she was not shaky at all. She does not work out really either besides being generally tired her legs were fine. The next day I was sore as if like I said before I did leg day and hers were normal. I feel like a couple years ago before BFS this would’ve been no issue for me as well. Just looking to see if anyone has experienced similar and what I can do to maybe help it.

[Previous]
Memory transcription subject: Governor Tarva of the Venlil Republic
Date [standardized human time]: July 12, 2136
The loud footsteps of the predators trailed behind Kam and me, practically at their mercy as N-04H carried Cheln, its arms firm against his wool. The humans had remained silent throughout the tour, keeping to themselves as if the stars dared to explode under their words. No doubt that they’re maintaining a presence of power.
My brain switched into autopilot mode, as I steered our group to the next stop: my office. However, the second I opened the door, I realized I had made a dreadful mistake. In this morning’s panic, I had left a TV on. The news was cycling through footage of bomb shelters across the planet. Government advisories played on loop in the background. They were speaking rather candidly about the humans’ foray, and the likelihood of mass casualties.
There was no point in turning it off, they were already aware of our fears. N-04H stared at the screen, motionless.
“Your fears are more numerous than expected,” It began. “Up close encounters stimulating fear are expected. This is not. Fear throughout the entire planet, not of a minority but of the whole population. This response is not logical given your reason.”
Oh speh, it figured something was entirely off…
“W-well,” I stuttered “, again, y-you’re the very first alien l-life–”
“The response is not logical.” It cut me off. It sounded… agitated. “No species would react in this manner on a whole scale to the news of extraterrestrial life for the first time. Based upon the given nature of the venlil, war amongst yourselves is unlikely, needing no reason for the bunkers… Why would you need the bunkers in response to us if we are the first ever exterrestrial life to be here?”
Both Kam and I just stood there in shock, as this thing had deduced something about our livelihood. It was smarter than we had expected. Oh speh, actually intelligent predators?! Oh we’re screwed!
“U-um, w-well you see–”
“Have you been lying to us, Governor Tarva?” It said coldly.
“U-um–”
“Have. You. Been. Lying. To. Us?” It asked again, stepping forward menacingly. It wouldn’t let me have the chance to defend myself as my voice was merely a whisper compared to its loud voice. How could it? It's a predator after all. It’s in their nature to be devoid of empathy and filled with sadism.
It set Cheln onto my desk, continuing to approach. It was corning Kam and I into the walls. I could feel my eyes watering as we both huddled up together. It stretched both of its hands out, ready to bash our heads against the wall and feast upon our corpses. Closing our eyes, we waited for the inevitable.
I heard a beeping. Opening one eye, I glanced at my desk, witnessing a report, though obscured by Cheln, on Venlil Prime’s orbit on the screen. A fleet had been detected in our space. May the Federation burn these monsters.
A soft hand landed on my skull. Panicking, I prepared to scream for my life. Instead, I felt its claws… scratch against my wool? Looking at Kam, he’s also getting the same treatment, equally as surprised as I am. It's... soothing… It feels nice despite the firmness behind it.
“You have no reason to fear us.” N-04H said. “The similarities between us and the previous aggressors are zero percent.”
“N-no reason?!” Kam spat. “Look at you! You’re a–”
“A predator.” It let both of us go, walking back to my desk. The 3D photo… Speh, I left it on my desk! The picture in question was of myself, at a conference with dozens of Federation leaders. It was obvious, to any intelligent observer, that those diverse life forms were not of Venlil origin. “We are not the first non-hostile species either, correct?”
“Y-yeah…” I said. “You’re not… H-how did you figure out that your species were–”
“The rest of the species in this photo follow a pattern. Side-eyed. Flat teeth, common amongst herbivores. No indication of carnivorous or omnivorous species.”
It took a while for my translator to process those unfamiliar words. Prey… Predator… half prey, half predator? What [bullshit] is this predator spewing?! Either way, it’s a sign of relief, showing how idiotic this thing is for believing in such a thing. Maybe there still is a chance to outsmart the beast.
“What?”
“There are no species that follow a stereotypical appearance of a predator. Only that of prey. Your reactions to us, which do not fit your views as prey, shows previous experience with other ‘predators’. Venlil fear is not by the unfamiliarity of the unknown, but instead of the opposite.”
“Y-you’re right…”
“Tell me about the other predators.” Silence blanketed the room with a heavy grip. Nobody wanted to explain what happened with the Arxur; not even Kam would offer pointed comments on that subject. “That is not a request, Governor Tarva.”
What words could provide an adequate description of evil incarnate? My eyes swelled with water as memories resurfaced. My father, captured alive on the warfront, shipped back piece by piece. The day the Arxur launched a gas attack against my daughter’s school and left her braindead. The slave pens, the irradiated worlds, the Venlil kept as cattle…
I buried my head in my paws, trying to hide the tears. Showing such weakness in front of the humans was the worst thing I could do. This species, for all its refined words, was cut from the same cloth as our oppressors. If they saw the extent of our pain, it would be weaponized down the road.
Before I could say anything, S-4R-4 walked into the room… When did it leave the room?! Where was it the entire time?!
N-04H didn’t bother to glance back at its fellow predator, instead saying: “We now already have the information needed. You do not have to say anything else.”
Another beep. Again from my desk. I stumbled towards it, looking at the screen as I nudged Cheln away. Another fleet had entered orbit. A Federation fleet. Oh we’re saved! Yes! Yes! Wait… they were already detected before…
Realizing the implication, I flicked my tail, gesturing Kam to come over where I stood, to confirm what I was reading. Looking down upon, his eyes widened, gasping as he came to the same conclusion as I did.
It wasn’t a Federation fleet that was first detected before. We both slowly looked up at the humans, the foul beasts in place next to each other. They knew… They knew! They were setting us up! Let the Federation burn them!
The report was showing that that the Federation Fleet had already made contact with the unknown one. With instinct, I went under my desk, searching for the panic button. It wasn’t there… it was ripped out.
Going back out, I saw that the humans remained still.
Silence. We were at a stand off, all four of us.
The human starts off: “No more lies, Governor Tarva. Let us settle this conflict diplomatically with the Federation. As equals”

You ma'am were my everything, from the moment I first saw you walking to my tow truck. I was in aww of you in that moment I was so hooked I can't explain it in any other way. I just needed to get to know the real you. Looking back I wish I could have slowed everything down a lot because we moved so fast. Opened the door for you and got you up into the truck. At first she was impressed I even would do that for her. She said it made her feel special and no one had ever done that for her. As I walked back to my door to get in time for me started to slow as I thought about a million things at once I was so drawn to her wanted everything for her and me to be amazing and guys, it really was great from my seat. She's absolutely gorgeous, sweet yet she's a pretty bad ass chick though. She's into heavy metal and rock over anything. She's my only ginger I've ever dated in my life. She's so beautiful, selfless when she knows u need something she is the first one to get it for you and she's an amazing cook, So incredibly sexy, and no matter what she broken and all was the only woman that I ever bought a real ring for wherever would and that red hair gets me now every time I find one around in my truck or my house. She loves to play with it as her nervous habit I used to say she was marking her territory jokingly but I loved watching her do it I love watching her play with it It was awesome to just be able to look over at her and see her sitting there was the greatest feeling in my life next to having my children and watching them be born. Seeing her smile was the most amazing thing I'd ever seen in my life That's what I lived for I lived for being silly with her and joking around and just having a good fucking time and spending that time with her no matter how much it was. I loved it always. Even when we fought I didn't ever stop loving her I did never stop caring about her obviously I was in it for us. Call me a wuss whatever you want I don't care I honestly have a thing with other people's hair it grosses me out when it is off the body so I'd have these piles of hair is have to immediately get out of the floor of my work truck when id open it for her to get her out of the truck lol it grossed me out but I didn't really care it was more funny that she was nervous cus we were so chill together. I quickly fell for this girl front the start and she was exactly what I said in the title. She's always going to be my blue little sundress passenger seat princess, the only women I've ever actually seen, planned, or dreamed of a future with and I've had longer relationship with kids even. But she has two sweet little girls that are amazing as well and I have become attatched to them as well throughout this 3 years. Especially because when her and I first met and went on our date I knew already that she was a mom of two but I hadn't met either one of them yet. Days after she was still with me and we spent every waking moment together in that truck. And we had a great time It just felt right. After that weekend was over we went to pick up her 3-month-old daughter. We had to go to the next town over and get her from her dad's house. As I got this little girl up into my truck put her car seat in the back of the tow truck I did what any normal person would do when meeting a baby for the first time. Started talking to her just to see her reaction to me. She was so sweet and so damn cute. She smiled so beautifully and was just so amazing it brought back all the memories for me having my kids. And that one really just cemented in the fact that I wanted to do this so much for my girl and I and for these kids cuz they were amazing. I spent my days just working away. Most the time with her by my side. There was times where yes we were not together 100% there's things she had to go do. Which was fine That's what we needed some time apart to miss each other cuz we did spend a lot of time together but honestly As long as we were there in my truck we were amazing together just hanging out while I was working spending time together and she said she loved watching me work. She loved how manly I smelled after and during a days work. Everything was great. So before her and I met I was always working and keeping to myself just trying to focus on myself but I lived in a hotel. So since her and I got hooked up together, we lived in my hotel which was not bad at all it was a fairly big hotel that offered reduced rates for long extended stays and they offered me a corporate discount. So it was fairly inexpensive as far as paying for the place but it was still extremely expensive compared to renting someplace. But it was by my own money because she had no income no job that I paid for everything. Literally everything. So as I worked 7 days a week and worked from time outta bed in the morning until well after midnight. I had no time to find our own place for cheaper living to start new direction for us. So she started searching for our own place to rent. Let's say we got distracted from that because of this damn drama that seemed to always be happening with her life. I'd always listen to what was going on with her and try to help. It's what I do in my everyday life I jump out of a truck when people are at their worst and it makes me feel a sense of joy because I get to get out of the damn truck like Superman get over to them and calm their life down a little bit slow it down for them when they're in their worst moments of the day and just take that weight off their shoulders. I get that fulfillment for my life that joy and it drives me to keep going That's the only reason I push through my days. I lived for it, soon after meeting her she became a big part of that meaning for me so much so I never even realized that it would end up costing me my career because I just couldn't do it anymore getting in that truck And as I open the door I see her there in the passenger seat with a flooded memory that comes rushing in and I get happy really quick like it's all real again and as soon as I sit down take my guys off that seat I look back over when it close the door cuz I'd always smile back at her when I got in the truck and she's not there and it breaks my heart every single time I experienced this so imagine getting in and out of that truck every day all day long and having to do that. I've been such an emotional wreck now that I literally had to go to my boss and quit my job because I couldn't safely do it and this was the job ladies and gentlemen that I prayed for at the end of our relationship I wasn't working hadn't been working for a few months because I just found out that I got cancer in my throat. So I got depressed I didn't know how to tell her my mom anybody being only 37 years old that I'm not going to be here that long Not as long as I thought so it started to destroy me and by this time in our relationship two and a half years in we had had several moves several little breakups but we'd always come back together and we always seemed great afterwards but then it always seemed like something would come up or she would lie or do something that I didn't like or that I wasn't approving of and every time I tried to talk to her about it she would just blow up at me and yeah there was lots of red flags I missed her out of a relationship I wish I could have done so many things different but stress and being what it is and everything you know I let my emotions get the best of me I let my my everything get the best of me every single time because as soon as she starts yelling it makes me louder and I just don't see anybody giving me that kind of a disrespectful stance especially when I'm trying to be calm I'm trying to just talk to them about it and then they blow up and makes me want to blow up right back So yeah my mistake but are honestly feel like it was just to cause me to do that so she could break up or we can break up and she can run away for a couple days and go get what she needed somewhere else and then come right back. That's what I feel like now. Don't know if it was all lie from delusional or what but everything I've read on here it all speaks to me so much that I honestly I really feel like I was lied to the entire time I was made to believe something that was never true This girl told me she loved me like 3 months in and I honestly felt it before that but I really think it was all just a facade now for her We found each other and we were broken pieces everywhere we started putting our lives together picking everything up putting ourselves back together and we felt more complete than anything is the way I saw our lives up until a year and a half into it though it was for me even with the little small breakups and stuff it was amazing It wouldn't trade it for the world soon as I found out I had cancer though guys It broke me I wasn't working I wasn't doing anything for myself and yeah that I regret I regret not just telling her right away because looking back now it may have helped but I doubt she would even cared She probably would have broke up with me then is how I feel now. But I never told her until almost 3 weeks after we broke up. The 17th of this month was my birthday my 38th birthday The day after is her 3-year-olds 3-year birthday. Which I didn't get to go to even though that little girl calls me dada loves me like there's no tomorrow and I love that little girl so so much she was like she was my daughter shortly after I found out I had cancer I was taking care of that little girl not working but taking care of her all day everyday for months in my house with her living here and my girlfriend living here while she worked. Then she's sitting here telling me griping at me that I need to get back working by about she can't be the only one working but then if I did that we wouldn't had a babysitter We would have nowhere for "Our daughter" She always insisted when I would say her daughter because she has a lot of hateful feelings towards her baby daddy. The other thing I forgot to mention is the fact that about 2 years into our relationship she went through a pretty major surgery for herself No one was there for her except for me I sat with her through the whole thing waited for her at the hospital I waited on her hand and foot at my place of living She laid in my bed took care of her gave her everything she needed and would do it again in a heartbeat The point is that I was there stood by her side took care of her in every way I needed to every way I could. In the first part of our relationship all the way through I'd say the first half She was always constantly wondering if I had eaten today or if I needed food or if I wanted her to cook me anything or I mean would she selflessly would do every single time she was happy to do it She loved doing it She loved being at the hotel and me coming home to a cooked meal how she would do it in her bra and underwear because just for shits and giggles you know She was the most sexually appetizing person I've been in with in my entire life number one and from day one of our relationship I never saw any other female on this planet My eyes never strayed not once they only saw her She was my everything. Fellas tell me when you fell in love If you ever felt the same because I know for me there was another woman on this planet that could ever even have compared to my woman she was so sexy so incredibly just mesmerizing for me and having her in my arms I felt complete I felt like a man I felt like I would move to heaven and earth for this woman and I was trying doing everything I could and it always just seemed like our little stupid spats and our bickering was so much more to her than it was to me because she would always end up leaving and going to her sisters. Her sister was and is so incredibly damaging for her mental state that I'm surprised that this woman has not killed herself yet She has no movement in her own life she's a stay-at-home girlfriend for her boyfriend of 16 15 16 years something like that and she is about a cow about 300 lb heifer that has always been jealous of anything the little sister gets that makes her happy that makes her have a better life than what big sister has then big sister has to sit there and destroy little sisters mental state just to bring her back down so she can feel good about her own self So anytime she ever went back there that's exactly what happened Big sister would just tear her down and break her down and it's just sick and that's where I think first mistake for us ever went was allowing her to move in there because as soon as she did seem like everything started going downhill and that's when I started finding things out about how much she was actually lying to me about stupid silly little things because her brother in-law and sister would talk to her about our relationship at night when they're all home together or whenever and they'd be giving her advice when these two are alcoholics they will not ever get married even though they've been together forever but this is just to not lose social security crap it's ridiculous there's a real fear of commitment between the two and a lot of damage between the two and it just fed right into my woman's head and I'm really truly believe it loud it her to be severely poisoned cuz she started turning into a completely different person but yet I still loved her like the day I first met her I still looked at her exactly the same I still do to this day even though she won't have anything to do with me for whatever reason I don't know I never got a reason but after everything we've been through I honestly felt like every time she made me promise never to leave her every time she made me the promise that she would never leave me no matter what blah blah blah I feel like it was all just a game to her now and a game to her family because my woman was the child that was traded off when things got too stressful for Mom she was the kid that was sent to the hospital to you know being the mental ward because it was just too tough for Mom to cope with having two kids and being as destroyed of a person as she is So of course that's led to a lot of emotional damages for my woman and for that entire family It's led to alcoholism and the other side of the family with her sister and her mom being best friends they hang out all day long and it's about the worst family situation you could think of but sadly she will still choose her family over anybody at the end of the day even though they don't choose her like that It breaks my heart to watch honestly the best thing she could do is cut them off from her life but there is a lot of times that she needed them there because she had no other option is what she felt instead of when we fought going there honestly alsoever wanted her to do is just calm down and instead of leaving stay here choose me over that bullshit fight choose me over the fucking nonsense of everything because at the end of the day none of it mattered to me I always forgave her for everything not because I wanted to be the doormat or because I allowed myself to be the doormat but because when I grew up I grew up in a Christian family That's what we do if we fight we work shit through I may not be the best Christian in the world but I know the values that I have in my family were not the same as hers they traded her off when times got tough they never showed her unconditional love so she doesn't even know how to unconditionally love her own children and it's really sad cuz honestly to this day I feel like that little girl would choose me over her own mother and that breaks my heart for her. I realize I've been rambling on for a while now but this one really doesn't sit right with me guys I've never had any issues with any breakup since this one and I know the mental state she was in when she made it and made this choice but the way she did it just recently after having promised her yet again and her promising me that we would never leave each other and to always fight for the relationship. She comes over about a 3 weeks ago we have sex been seen each other in a few days few days prior to that we went and took "our daughter" to her dentist appointment she had to be knocked out at and did great through who'd she want afterwards after she woke up me Not her mom just me to comfort her. So being the dad that I am of course I did that I gave her the comfort she needed we had a great day together but it was short-lived. My girl's been in such a bad spot mentally but she refused to talk to me about it I could never get her to open up and yes I did a lot of things wrong because I was always trying to fix her or trying to help her through it is how I see it She saw it as me trying to fix her and she said I don't need to be fixed. But I know I didn't see it that way and that may have been my mistake because she wasn't looking for advice or whatever on how to try to help her through it but she just wanted somebody to listen to her which I did I can repeat everything she's ever told me about an issue word for word I can almost predict in my head I can sit there and say okay what's she going to say. And then I can literally as she's saying it out loud I can pretty well determine already know what she's going to say while listening though just to make sure I don't miss anything It ends up being the same thing every time and it's always all about her family's issues and things going on between them. It's been this way for the last year and a half probably since she moved in there now just before this breakup she had been for a couple months looking for place for us to go cuz I want out of where I'm at now and she obviously wanted out of there and so she was supposedly looking for it for a place to go That was ours because I got a new job I sat here and prayed for a new job that I had applied for and they just weren't moving fast enough or something I guess because like 4 days before she broke up with me they called and I started working I was so happy I got back in that truck I was doing it for her for us for me for those girls everything was going the way I had invisioned it going. Then like I said two days go by she came over spend some time together We had a little quickie and then we went to her appointment with the psych doctor couple days later she breaks up with me This is how I wake up the next morning after being at work all night long in my tow truck to a text message and I'm blocked on everything every single social media outlet every everything that we had together online I'm just blocked. Knowing the mental state she was in I was like what the hell is going on now I got a short text message that said something like I can't do this anymore This is after going through her girl parts being taken out being with her the entire time waiting on her hand and foot this is after saving her daughter because her drunk ass sister drove home from their mothers house while watching the like 5-month-old baby at the time and ran the car into the fucking house in the middle of the night and we were both working shoot while she was watching her That's why she was watching her So of course I get a phone call she can't leave work and she's freaking out because her daughter was just in the car that just slammed into the house and did thousands and thousands and thousands of dollars worth of damage So what happens This guy goes and rescues the child and keeps the child with him the entire rest of my work night until mom gets off work there's lots of reasons that this woman has loved me completely and tried so hard and there's lots of reasons why I've loved her as completely as I could and tried so hard and tried getting back on track now I used her in those kids and myself to get me back to a point where I could even start to function again after finding out I had cancer and not knowing how to tell her or anybody and what hurts the most is the fact that she just gave up and just blindsided me with all of this if I feel like and it kills me but this is what I had to do because of her putting all her walls up and just stonewalling me with everything and knowing the fact that even on her Facebook she chose to not put family photos of us for up there but to put every other photo of that entire time together on there even ones that she had taken separately with just her and her girls making it look like nobody else was there the entire time She just failed to include the you know few pictures she took all of us. Which are now deleted off her phone obviously cuz she deleted everything of us together She always does that She always does it just deletes them because she never had any good memories as a child so she has an inability to just keep that stuff because it's painful to her now for some reason even if it was a happy memory She doesn't like those happy memories cuz those are painful that they're not going to happen anymore so she just erases everything and gets rid of it because it's easier for her while I'm not that type of person I'm a sentimental person I keep everything So of course when she goes gets her mind off track whatever I start to be sweet and send her you know our pictures together and things because I know she's already done deleted them which gets her nine times out of 10 and gets her right back to where she needs to be and realizing that I'm there for her that I I want her I choose her and I choose to do this together well not this time She completely stonewalled me wouldn't even respond to me for days and it was literally out of the blue So I'm freaking out because I'm thinking she's going to go hurt herself which she's tried to do a few times and she just reapped on all her medication the last time she tried to hurt herself that's what had happened She took all of her medication and thank God nothing happened but now she had you know six new bottles of pills which would have done it so I was scared for her life honestly. So I was literally just freaking out day after day night after night and all while having to work at night now with this new job in the truck that I was freaking out because I couldn't see her in my passenger seat anymore and then I was seeing her and then I was worrying about her and I was concentrating more on her than I was even able to do my job like I said I had to give it up even though I sat there and prayed for her prayed for myself to pray to get the job and it was literally a blessing because they created the position for me they didn't need to fill a position they created it for me I've been doing this job for well over 10 years of my career and I'm damn good at it Just not right now and so for the last month after everything that I found out everything that it's been said This is what I had to do guys and I I can't regret it I can't feel any type of way about it but I've been pushing and pushing and pushing on purpose because I know she's not coming back no matter what That's the way she feels but once I stop trying to fight for the relationship to fight for her and fight for those kids I know she's going to start to feel the feelings of losing me and it's going to start getting into her head so I knew if I stopped talking to her that's what would happen and she would try to slide right back into my life a month later whenever however it would happen she would come back eventually and I'm not going to be in a new place in my life where I would allow her to do that I can't So what I did was I pushed on purpose not only because she made me promise to do it but because I knew it's what needed to happen because I needed my mental state to be better and it's not right now I'm a wreck right now because of this woman because of losing this woman cuz I honestly felt like she's the one person on this planet that I would never let go. So my life is just turned into a fucking wreck on a wreck on a wreck because of her vindictive nature her mean-spirited bullshit when she gets mad She doesn't not have a filter so she uses her daughter against me how's it feel no that you'll never see "her daughter" ever again trying to dig into my heart and just cause more pain This is the type of stuff she would say to me That would just break me down to nothing. I've literally been in tears since the breakup and before that because I I think I kind of knew it was coming but I was just so depressed that I couldn't do anything I would cry every night even a month before we were broken up I would cry every night just cuz I missed her I missed her being next to me but that was her own fault that was her own doing She lied put words in my roommate's mouth that were never there and she couldn't apologize She could not be an adult and apologize to him and then it would have been fine She would have been a loud back at the house She would been able to come see me but she just is not the adult that I thought she was or that she used to be before when we first got together and and I don't understand what happened I can't see where it all just went so terribly wrong except for her moving in with her family. It has been the greatest experience of my life loving this woman but at the same time in the end it has been so destructive so I had to make sure that she would never come back So for the last month I've been pestering her coming at her yelling at her calling her all these names in the book and just destroying anything she ever had for me because I won't let her back into my life I can't cuz I know if I do it will be the death of me so I'm choosing me over the love of my life. The woman that I have lived for for this past three fucking years of my life given everything to worked my ass off so I could fucking just keep going the next day to provide what I could for us as a family mind you have paid for everything every waking moment for the first year and a half of our lives because she didn't have a job She didn't work so I paid for everything and that's everything we needed for the baby as well. That couldn't get bought with food stamps. Literally drained every bit of funds that I had saved up everything Just took me for a rollercoaster ride through hell but I chose me I choose me now And hopefully the apartment that she was finding for us the one that she supposedly went to Once she supposedly is at now I hope her I wish her all the best but I had to sit here and destroy any chances of ever being with the woman that I still to this day want because I know she comes back crawling back I knew that I would take her back in a heartbeat and I just can't do it so I had to get it done and over with for me for her for everybody because I won't be hurt like that I won't be disrespected like that I won't be turned into a monster because she tears me down with her hateful little remarks and digs into my heart that are totally unnecessary when I'm being everything I can try to be and be sweet for her She literally anytime I would try to be sweet would turn it into something it's not telling me I'm manipulating her telling me I'm doing this I'm doing that well okay so that's what I'll do That's what I thought and that's exactly what I did If I'm the monster let me know cuz I feel like it honestly but I know it's for the best. To my little blue sundress princess, the love of my life I'm Sorry I had to do what I did sweetheart I'll always love you no matter what babe Just can't have you walk back into my life and and destroy everything that I build from here on out because I'll end up killing myself and I don't want that to happen so this is goodbye even though I know you'll never read this. Just know that I see you everywhere in every place I go there's memories that fled back to me everyday that are amazing or that are bad or that are just that their memories they will fade eventually hopefully but for now they are still too real for me to just forget like seems like you want to do by going out there and supposedly live in your best life faking it just to make it for the rest of the world being that strong independent woman with that attitude exactly even though I know you're sad inside I know you just buried those feelings All the love you had for me and you're lying to yourself but that's on you now I tried I really really tried to get you to understand that that's where we were headed was the life we wanted so sorry I asked you to choose me and love me for me instead of love me for what I had or didn't have. I'm sorry I needed to do this or even felt like I needed to do this cuz I will always love you no matter what, But now my life is going to be for me and for me only for its remainder because you gave up the fight and I ended it.

I went to bed healthy one night, then woke up with a rash on the back of my neck, and swollen knees, elbows, and hands. Within 48 hours, the rash spread pretty much everywhere but my torso (arms, behind ears, eyes, legs, etc), and the swelling spread everywhere (feet, ankles, knees, hips, wrists, knuckles, lips). My feet were so swollen they were purple and I could barely walk from my bed to the couch. I could not close my fist, any kind of pressure hurt so bad. The rash turned into large hives eventually that were incredibly itchy. I took ibuprofen, Tylenol, and Benadryl but nothing helped.
Luckily, I was put on a 40mg prednisone taper that worked like magic! I am finishing the taper soon and am nervous because the doctors have no clue what caused this so I'm not sure if it will be coming back / how to prevent this.
Does this sudden onset sound familiar to anyone else?
(My ANA came back negative. My rheumatoid factor was normal. I tested negative for all tick-borne illnesses. I have still had some odd aches and pain despite the prednisone that present as a deep throbbing ache in my joints like my hips, knuckles, knees, etc.)

Ive heard quite a few times that heists on payday 3 don't have the same impact as previous games. I believe it's a problem of the "get out ASAP" game design and just some boring objectives. While I can't suggest anything for the former, the latter goes like this from me!
NRFTW
This heist being the first one excuses the more simplistic design and I agree with it. Only gripes I got are these

• The dye pack timer should scale with player count.

I find it a bit stupid that solo players are the only ones that can't defuse all packs without an ECM. I think that making non 4 player teams (1-3) either risk it or have a dedicated ECM carrier is more interesting. Maybe a voice line from Shade hinting that it's a feature too. It's completely hidden as it is now.

• Script cop spawns near the electrical boxes

The push past everyone to the escape zone has more cops than the "locked down perimeter" a bit beyond it. Nuff said
Road Rage
This heist mostly suffers from being boring on repeat play thrus. The fix is complex to execute but simple as an idea.

• Make the roadblocks dynamic instead of preset.

Add a swat van driving into the path of the van, cops breaking a scaffold etc. The only time players gets caught out is in the very first playthrough, really boring.
Dirty Ice
This is one of the best heists in the game in terms of player choice and freedom. The only problem of the diamond cleaning being useless is also being fixed in the next update too. I honestly don't have any gripes. You stay for as long as you want and do it your own way.
Rock The Cradle
Honestly, this heist needs some sort of restructure. Or item placement changes.

• Remove the blue keycard of the VIP door guard.

Since the game launched people have been exploiting this to skip 50+% of the heist. It's a stupid oversight to stick to.

• Do something about the flip boxes.

Yea real smart. But I'm not sure what to suggest with the locked RNG being in the game. New objective, diffrent way of them working, not sure ngl.
Under The Suprhaze
This heist overall is pretty cool but it can be a bit fatiguing on failed attempts. It's really long in some aspects (both stealth and loud) and if I need to replay it I just groan, seeing how much progress I lost.

• Make the QR codes faster to grab.

Please there's 7 and each takes a small eternity to grab. I'm not wasting a skill to do that.

• Either improve or remove the floor-is-lava rooms

This is a first person shooter, parkour is not the games strongsuit. Mantling or jumping is a gamble, bouncing off of walls on jumps is common, it's not really fun to sweat over it. Maybe it's a skill isue :shrug:

• Rethink the stealth secure point

I honestly cannot play this stealth without a zipline asset. The secure point is a block away from the building, across a very populated park. Is this me being punished for "not planning it out"?

• Make the final assault trigger on last mission critical painting being picked up, not the usb one

Just...why. You can litterally just not pick up the usb painting or pick it up last and circumvent the huge obstacle. Not a fan

• Wi-Fi circles. Nuf said

Gold And Sharke
This heist for the most part is fine, just not as epic as I would have wanted it to be but that's subjective. Anywho-

• The QR requirement for the manager rooms is not needed.

The starting objective needs QR codes to get into manager rooms but it just feels like padding. Scavenging thru the intire bank for random phones to guess what's behind door number 3...or just use tricks/glitches/oversights to basically skip it. Just leave it as locked doors, no need for QRs.

• Wi-Fi circles. Nuff said
  
• The drill should beep when low on oxygen and the marker for where the oxygen is doesn't need to spawn AFTER the drill breaks.
  

I've had countless runs where I just get distracted for a minute and the drill breaks due to no oxygen. It's a simple QOL feature. Also Shade says the drill needs oxygen but waits for it to break before saying WHERE it is. Just spawn it when it's red at least.
99 Boxes
Hoo boy. The more I play this the less I want to do it again. This intire heist is just a really long holdout and kinda just needs a full remake imo, let's see if I can think of something. Where to begin...

• Make the parkour paths harder to miss

Again, the game is not made for parkour. I lose more health breaking my legs than the cops. I'm not even sure I'm getting to some containers the way the devs intended lol.

• Wi-Fi circles. aaaaAAAA

Change them into a minigame or perhaps rerouting the signal of a recently arrived FBI van to get a location signal to spoof instead of damn circles. Maybe have players rotate the dish manually until a signal is caught and then grab the chip before the FBI interupts the hi-jack.

• The spike strip objective is a bit...pointless?

The whole objective is just nothing, grab a consistant spawn object, place it, NOW you can leave. It takes 10s at most. You could change it into players having to move cop cars Brooklyn 10-10 style into a blockade, dissable the cars (shoot tires, break engines etc) and THEN leave. That's way more interactive.
Touch The Sky
This heist is a cool premise but it felt like devs really ran out of steam on the objectives on here ngl. Even Shade knows with the safe in a vault comment.

• Wi-Fi circles...jeez

This is getting tiresome. This could be maybe a rewire objective, follow wires from the console to trick it's current status (door locked or not). Heck, blow it open in loud or something, it's a wooden door with metal lining.

• The red keycard for the main office is a bit boring but mostly fine.

We're breaking into an office of a gun runner and its key is just in a random paper room? Cmon. It could be hidden in the bedroom, maybe even booby trapped so snoopers wouldn't get away with such a steal.

• As Shade mentions, the safe is not necessary.

It's padding. Remove it

• Increase the difficulty of removing the encryption off of the ssd.

Add timed checks to like flick an accept Hoxton breakout style when the ssd asks for one, find a required hash in Masons notes for it etc. Its the last mission of this first chapter but the end goal is a simple hack. Spice it up
Turbid station
This heist is mostly good. Only real problem is the damn security room cart.

• Make the "If the blue shirt guy is dead" objective the main way to get into the cart.

If you didn't know, if you kill the executive guy you get a secondary way to open the train cart. It's way safer and it opens the cart PWLERMENANTLY. Why is the """punishment"""" for not following the plan is an easier route???

• Make hacking SSD make a noise again

This one I'm honestly not sure is the case but I THINK it's completely silent. It wasn't so in 2.
Cook off
This heist is another perfecto, no real problems other than some bugs that may or may not be patched. So only problem from me is this

• Fix the houses proportions.

The doors feel commically wide. Staircase feels commically wide. It's silly.
Syntax error
This one's a doozy. Some things done well, some not so.

• Shorten the main door hack in loud.

In all loud lobbies I've done, everyone knows to stealth the first bit to get the code for the door due to it being faster. A bit silly ngl.

• The red keycard spawns are commically bad for new players.

There are dozens of clips of players running for an hour, not finding the red keycard. The red shelves are not that obvious and are low on the floor. Hang em on the wall atleast!!

• Techie sucks with the current armor system.

The techie so far has had two states. So stupidly OP that leaving her alive or running out to kill her is virtually the same in terms of resource drain. And how she is now, a mosquito with no real threat. Going out to kill her takes more resources than tanking it. The design is stupid with her hiding out. It's never worth hunting her during an assault. More so if you got drone hack skills.

• The park objective is...silly

If you kill cops in the park (as the objevtive says) you won't progress. You need to be in the field and kill park enemies. Bruh-

• The escape should have been further away or in a sewer.

It's silly planning wise to buy thousands of dollars worth of explosive equipment to...cross the street. It's anti climatic imo
PHEW...Let me know your thoughts!

My normal posts are 2-5 paragraphs. This is long because it's a starter.
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The sloping ground around the Kiaurk family mesa had been sculpted into shelves or terraces, and it was on one of those upper terraces that Kiaurk Nshurr now lounged beneath a pergola anchored to the striated stone face behind her. The mesa rose at her back: an enormous, looming, almost sheer outcrop that her family's dwellings had been carved into the face of. Wide, shallow steps cut into the artificial (but entirely convincing) sandstone wound their way up between landings and porticos leading inward, between tiny balconies shaded by bright solid-colored canopies, between rooms with flat walls and rounded corners that came jutting out to shadow the steps below. Rriigkhans rarely used glass as window barriers; smooth-edged holes had been cut through the rock in varying shapes and sizes. It could be difficult to tell which apertures were windows and which were entryways. A physical barrier that kept out the elements was obsolete in all but the crudest dwellings, though some of these larger holes were curtained with braided string or strips of cloth that served a purely decorative purpose.
From her high vantage point Nshurr could see the shelves stretching out below her as the base of the mesa leveled out to flattish terrain that was a wonderland of vegetation in muted rainbow colors: mustard yellows, clay reds, earthy browns and the occasional dash of sage or dusty blue. This scrubland lay like a blanket around everything below that was not part of the village between the mesas. Down there, adobe compounds never taller than two or three storeys seemed so squat compared to the mesas that Nshurr could see towering in the distance, many of those family mesas only a few hours walk from her own if she traveled by foot. The village sprawled, with tile parkways winding in serpentine fashion between the various buildings, courtyards, parks, and ponds. There were no property lines, no clear division of the land into neat little plots owned by the individuals who lived and worked in these places. It all seemed to be part of a whole, with a single unifying aesthetic. The village housed those rriigkhans of the lower castes, the kharratah and chelhautah, and the humans which were a caste all their own, haukagh-ar, except for a small number who lived with their masters in the caverns of the mesas or up on the plateau.
This planet, Sgarrl, terraformed over three hundred years ago, was home to more human servants than any other Ssaarian world – aside from Earth, of course, discovered eighty years ago. The fact that humans shared so much in common with rriigkhans made them the perfect species to incorporate into the rriigkhan caste structure as servants. They breathed the same mix of gases and required similar gravities, and their nimble little fingers were very useful for all sorts of work.
The rriigkhan language was not necessarily too complex for humans, but it was wholly unfamiliar – too many phonemes that did not fit comfortably in human mouths, from grunts to huffs, to rolling trills that might by voiced or not, sometimes rumbling out like a purr. To a human, Nshurr's name was a sigh and a trill, and yet she was accustomed to humans vocalizing her name in their heavy, slurring way: Na-Shuurr! Nasher! Sometimes simply: ɽ͡r! which she recognized more easily as her name, or at least part of it, and not some random sounds.
Still, despite the weird pidgin humans had made of her language and their English, she liked the little creatures. She had come to live with her Grandmother on Sgarrl only days ago, and had never encountered them before. The males only stood as tall as her collar. The females were shorter still, much like the males of her own species.
To human eyes Nshurr was felinoid, with a muscular swimmer's body and the broad muzzle of a big cat, with watchful, forward-facing predator's eyes that seemed unexpectedly expressive, because rriikghans had almost as many muscles around their eyes as humans did around their mouths to convey the nuances of emotion. Despite being larger than even many Earth men, she was considered sleek by rriigkhan standards. She made up for that with her broader crest.
The rriigkhan crest was something like the crest of Utahceratops – a keratinized plate growing up out of the skull, except divided into three lobes instead of two, with scalloped edges along the outer rim. Unlike depictions of Utahceratops, the rriigkhan crest was not covered by skin. At least, not on the top. Thick ropy veins squiggled under velvet fur on the underside, closer to the neck. (A thick, arching neck muscular enough to support the weight of that crest meant that Rriigkhans walked with a stoop that made them seem hunchbacked, to humans.) The surface of the plate on top was often rough, even bumpy or corrugated like deer antlers in some areas, smooth in others. Every female crest had four tines jutting from the front – a pair several inches above the eyes, and another pair further up. Directly above the lowest set of tines were twin holes, the howrf channels, just big enough for a human to insert a finger. These holes were very much like nostrils – much deeper, but damp inside, and lined with short, fine hairs to protect the sensitive mucous membrane from debris. The organs housed within these channels were the heart of rriigkhan culture, the foundation of all relationships, of sex.
Male rriigkhans, of course, had only their neotonous crests: diminutive, mostly smooth with rounded edges, without tines or howrf channels. Cute.
Nshurr's crest was wider than average, her upper tines spaced further apart, and combined with a compact face this made her look top-heavy. (A human might say that she was more snow leopard than lion.) Most female crests did not interfere with the movement of the ears – highly mobile, highly expressive paddle shaped things – but the edges of Nshurr's crest did jut out enough to almost shield them.
That her crest was weighty, that it was inconvenient, that she was often aware of it – this was Nshurr's pride. Her long tail curled in pleasure when she caught males looking at it. Humans seemed to be intimidated by it sometimes, as if she might decide to gore them with her “horns.” She considered herself a confident person; not a braggart, but self-assured, and to carry her jhekaah so visibly pleased her to no end.
Her fur was an almost peachy off-white, but a mask of pale peach shaded each seafoam green eye. The mask blended into the white further up her forehead until fur gave way to bone-tan crest, and was split between her eyes by the white of her nose. Oblong spots in that same peachy color, each blending from dark to light, streaked down her sides.
These weren't the natural colors of her distant ancestors. It was unheard of to see a rriigkhan who was not gene-modified in some way, even if those modded genes had been part of rriigkhan life for so long that no one thought of them as mods any longer. She also thought nothing of the subtitles her augmented reality implant displayed whenever a human spoke, AI translated to help her decipher the pidgin. AR was simply a part of her, had been since she was a kit.
Reclining as she was on a padded lounger in front of an iron brazier, full of cold ashes from last night's fire, Nshurr was dressed in a pale coral shift only a few shades darker than the peach of her fur. Medallions trailing fringes of cloth had been sewn onto the front bottom half of the knee-length garment. A row of those ornate medallions defined a plunging neckline that bared much of her chest, muscular and broad, possibly even masculine to a human. Her breasts were lower on her body and similar in appearance to a mare's udders: long nipples on a pudge of fat nestled close together on the pelvis, just above the place where her thighs joined her body. They were only small lumps beneath the shift when Nshurr stretched out her legs so that the thin fabric fell across them. It was the roundness of her hips and buttocks that marked her female to the human eye. (As if her crest didn't make that obvious!)
She was listening to the sound of two younger female cousins wrestling on a nearby terrace, and although from her vantage point Nshurr could not see them, she could imagine the scene from what she heard: Fherou and Lahk growling while they grappled with their arms, the crack of crest hitting crest and then the scrape of tine sliding against tine. Each was fighting to control the other's head, each trying to bite the other. It wasn't easy when each had a shaggy ruff to protect her neck, and any attempt to bite the other's face would be thwarted by an interposing crest. Rriigkhan hands were less dexterous than human hands, more pawlike with stubby fingers, but capable of delivering hard blows, and once or twice Nshurr heard a cousin snarl in response to a strike against her body.
The competitive pheromones her cousins exuded from their unextended howrfs, quite unconsciously, were beginning to make Nshurr's own heart beat faster. The end of her long tail, where it hung down from the reclining chair, lashed in agitation. She was beginning to imagine sinking her teeth into someone's skin herself, and if her cousins had not been so much younger and smaller than herself she might have gone down to their terrace to show them a thing or two. It was putting her off the human flute music she'd been listening to, fed directly into her own brain through her implant for her private enjoyment. (Certain aspects of human culture were very popular here on Sgarrl; she'd been curious about it.)
She did not feel like going inside to escape the pheromones; Nshurr craved the warmth of the sun on her fur, not the cool stone and artificial light of those warrens. Most of her male cousins had gone into the village for boating today. Well, perhaps she would go down and join them after all.
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OOC Information:
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For this prompt I imagine you'd play a human servant, probably a new arrival to Sgarrl but maybe someone who was born there. Even though I've set up a situation where my character would have a lot of power and yours very little, I want to clarify that I'm not interested in abusing your character I am looking for a slow burn interspecies romance that develops naturally. This story may deal with power imbalances and even speciesism, but I'd like to explore those topics realistically.
I want to explore all aspects of loving relationship... Flirting, cuddling, kissing, lots of romantic scenes and character growth. My “type” that I'm most attracted to are men with average bodies in the 40-60 age range, with realistic personality flaws. I am more than willing to tailor my character's personality and physical attributes to suit your tastes, within reason. I appreciate partners willing to do the same.
I prefer to reply more than once a day. 2-3 replies per day would be ideal, but I understand life gets in the way. I usually write 2-5 paragraphs, or 150-450 words per post. This starter is much longer than my typical post length, but my lengths vary according to need. If I'm introducing a new character or setting a scene, my post might go up to 1,000 words.
Please send a writing sample if you have none in your post history. No need to custom write anything for me, old samples are fine. Click here to PM me!

I don't know whether I should write these things down or not. I feel very hopeless and depressed. My life seems so bleak, and nothing I can do will change that. I just want to be free—free of pain, free of stress, and free of abuse. Everything that I have gone through must have meaning, because if it doesn't, then I might just end it all.
I don't know why she acts this way. I did not force her to give birth to me. She was the one who decided it. Even my own father was against me being born, not because he didn't want me, but because he knew how messed up she was. He wanted to leave, but couldn't because of me. Poor him. I pity my father so much. If I wasn't born, maybe he could have left this abusive relationship. He could have been free. But I am a selfish person, and to be honest, I am glad that he didn't leave, because if he had left, I would have probably been sold off to someone to get married. Even now, she threatens me with it, saying that she could make someone kidnap me and force me to become their wife. I'm only 18, by the way, so imagine that happening. It isn't that uncommon in my culture; in fact, most of my sisters got married that way and they never left because of honor. But they thought that this was the only way to escape the monster—from one abusive household to another. My poor sisters. I also pity them. My father is their stepfather, and although he wanted to be involved in their lives, she never let that happen. Guess why. Because she was jealous of her own children. One of my sisters even ran away from home and got married to someone much older than her because she couldn't take it anymore. Her whole life got ruined because of it. And now she does the same thing to me. She accuses me of sleeping with my own father. Since I became a teenager, my virginity has always been in question. I don't even do anything for her to suspect something like that. She even says herself that none of my peers would sleep with me, so I probably try to do it with my own blood-related father. It's sickening. I don't even want to talk about physical abuse; that's just my daily routine now. I remember being beaten with a wooden stick for 10 minutes straight because I didn't wait for her to pick me up from school. I was nine or ten. I didn't know any better. And our house is 20 minutes away, walking distance. One time, she made me bleed from my head and I had to calm her down and apologize for "making her hurt me." I don't know what to do anymore. My arms are full of scars, and I am ashamed of showing them. When my friends ask, I say they are gifts from my mother. Today she threw me out of the house. If it wasn't for my dad, I would have become homeless. I am just so tired. I want to end it all.