I (39/American/F) had a child with a (39/Indian/M) and I am now a single mother to a very curious 5 yr old daughter. Backstory: I was overseas in the military and taking a break for R&R. I had always wanted to visit India, so I booked a trip to Southern India. While I was there, I unexpectedly fell in love with a man I had met who lived in northern India. I had to return back to my post in the military, but we kept in touch. This was approximately 10 years ago. I was in the military for another 4 to 5 years and we kept in touch the entire time. I decided once I separated from the military that I wanted to do animal rescue work in India. I wanted to travel the country first to figure out where I was going to move to, and he offered to come with me. So we had chocked the country together, and I chose a place to move to that was not where he lived. He always respected my independence and never pressured me to be anything other than myself. We had a great relationship, and once I had moved to India, we flew to visit each other quite often. We were in love, so of course we were doing the deed. I had been diagnosed with polycystic ovarian disease years before I met him. So we never never use protection and I never never got pregnant. I also never got pregnant my entire life so it was not anything I was concerned about. I explained to him the condition and we never use protection. When I was leaving India to go back to the United States because of a visa issue, he came to help me pack and move all of my stuff. He stayed with me for a few weeks. I always respected his boundaries, that I was a secret to most of his family though I had met some of his friends and cousins over the years. We were both very respectful about each other’s boundaries. I knew that his religion was keeping him from telling his mother and immediate family about me. I had no issue with this. While he was helping me pack my stuff and move, he brought up the idea of getting married. I told him I don’t know if you want to marry me because I don’t know if I can give you what you want. I know he loved kids and wanted to be a father. He said he wanted to marry me and we went to see if we could get married before I left. The law and India are very strict and we were not able to get married there. So we decided we will just wait until I get back to America and do the marriage visa thing. When I got back, I was so nauseous. I never even thought to take a pregnancy test, until my best friend had mentioned it. So I took one … Just because I had no idea why I was so nauseous all the time. Turns out I was pregnant. I called him and I talked to him about it. He said that I could make whatever decision I wanted to because it was my body. He said he would support me in whatever decision I made. So I went and got all the tests done and thought really hard about it. I never actually wanted to be a mom after finding out that I most likely wouldn’t be. I had kind of come to terms with that. But I ended up keeping the baby. And I am so grateful and happy that I did. Even though things did not work out between he and I, I am still completely happy that I have such a wonderful, beautiful, amazing daughter to share my life with. From the point I found out I was pregnant and that I was going to keep the baby, he and I started making plans for the marriage visa. Though it was our plan before I even left India and knew that I was pregnant, now I feel like he wanted to be here even more. Up until she was six months old and I was preparing to send in the visa application and the application fees, he was totally on-board. When she was six months old, he decided he didn’t want to come here and he didn’t want to leave his family. So we parted ways and he then had no intention on keeping in touch with her through video messaging or telephone calls. I don’t know if it was his own feelings of guilt or that he felt like his family would disown him, but he just completely had no interest in her life at all after that. Now, whenever she ask me, which is not very often, I just say that he lives in India. I show her on a map where India is and where we are. She doesn’t ask anymore questions for now, but I know there will be questions later. And I don’t want her to have any feelings of abandonment. I don’t want her to feel like he chose his family and his life over her. But I also don’t want to lie to her. So I’m feeling very conflicted about how I’m going to approach the situation later down the line. If you have any suggestions or experience with this type of situation, Please share!

Had a huge crush on my coworker. We started hanging out platonically outside of work. We have a lot in common it’s crazy. I showed hints of flirting but he wouldn’t make a move.
Decided to move on so started seeing someone else (M24) but I don’t see potential with him.
I go over to (M30)s house to hangout one day. I flirt and surprisingly it worked and we kissed and confessed to liking eachother. He says but don’t have expectations because I disappoint everyone. Okay whatever.
I discover he has avoident attachment style, he is bad with showing affection verbally. He will compliment my appearance like my butt or my hair. He will never be overtly affectionate like “you look beautiful today” or “I’m glad to see you, I always have a good time with you” like he doesn’t lay it on thick. Which I’m trying to get used to but it makes me feel dry.
I’m trying to get used to that he shows affection with physical touch and quality time. I just want it to feel more desired and like a woman as in I want to be romanced and flirted with. I guess he’s not used to that sort of thing.
One day I went over to his place and at the end of the night I tried initiate sex and he basically said something that really killed the mood and made me feel we were not compatible at all sexually. Basically he said he doesn’t like kissing, even though we kissed all the time and he would get hard immediately.
I cried and left feeling like we are over and then I spent the next 2-3 weeks getting over him and I did. Because that really turned me off. And we didn’t talk about it afterwards I just saw him a few times at work.
3 weeks later at work he finally talks about it and says he’s sorry and he didn’t even mean it that he doesn’t like kissing, he was just tired and not in the mood and he didn’t know how to say that. And he wants to see me again.
I said okay I’ll give it another shot but I feel like the flame has been blown out even though I noticed him giving me more physical affection. I just don’t feel like a girl that’s being romanced I feel like friend and it sucks because I think he is trying.
We only work together once a week and our schedules are out of synch.
Going back to the (M24) I was seeing briefly. He was like the apposite. He likes me and made sure I knew it. Always flirting and compliment me and we would call whenever we get the chance and fall asleep on the phone together. I think that’s how it should be when you’re dating someone. Not just seeing them once a week with no calls no texts.
I’m just sad because I was really into him but I think I need more attention and to feel special.
I can only see him on Fridays and he has dnd every other Friday. So basically I see him once every two weeks.
And if I tell him I want more affection he’ll probably just give up and say that’s not who he is. I don’t feel the flame I had because of this coldness I don’t feel like a girl.
Also I can’t give him too much affection because he gets uncomfortable by it.
It’s also possible I’m too used to being love bombed and used to dating “players” that are more flirty and confident. I love him because he is not like the others I dated. He’s a good man but it’s just this lack of intimacy and attention that’s making me feel dry.

Evergreen, a rather welcoming name. Perfect for a land full of calm, peace and beauty. Evergreen in this case is the name of a vast kingdom. This kingdom is an incredibly complicated but majestic land and its people as well. Now sit back, relax and enjoy as I tell you about Evergreen.
First of all, where did Evergreen come from? Well the most early evidence of anyone living here was over 8000 years ago though if you truly think about it it could be as far back as 50 000 years. You see, the oldest trace of civilization in the kingdom is a large ancient hotel in the center of Heatherlea. No other building outdated this and that record is still held up to this day. The actual date of foundation of the kingdom is completely unknown and absolutely no one can tell when it could ever be because of the incredibly vague amount of information on anything before the recorded history of Evergreen. Though not everyone is so clueless, one person may know the answer on the timeline and that is The One Hundred.
You may be asking who this One Hundred person is. He is the oldest person in Evergreen and supposedly some sort of God. Very little is known about him but all that is known is whoever this person is, they are the most powerful in the kingdom.
Now I think you’ve heard enough about the kingdom itself and the basics on it now why don’t we get to work on actually unraveling this massive mystery. But with so many things to explain, how can this ever have an order? Well that’s very easy to do, this is a catalog of everything to know on the topic of Evergreen. Let’s begin.
Cities of Evergreen
Evergreen is the main city of the kingdom, it is used as a capital as well as the largest megalopolis of the city. Though in Scriptorium, the language of Evergreen, they don’t have terms for city, megalopolis or metropolis. So to them everything is a settlement, village or town. In this kingdom the size of a village does not matter only its population and Evergreen having over 1 000 000 people living in it, it’s considered the largest village in the kingdom. Which is quite a fitting label for the capital of such a large kingdom. Though not only Heatherlea contains an important building. Evergreen has the Main Hall and Steffy’s Mansion, both constructions are very important because they contain Aletine. Aletine is a rare gem that will be explained later on but for now all you need to know on Aletine is that it is very rare and very precious. The buildings each have an arch constructed fully of this material.
The whispers of Evergreen
Not everyone in Evergreen is happy with what they know about the kingdom. Certain things are very secretive and though on the outside it seems like a perfect place it is shrouded in mystery and entangled in a web of unknown like a huge tapestry of mystery. The people of the villages are mostly happy with how everything is going except for one thing. They want to know more about the village’s origin. You see, Steffy, The One Hundred, Heathotel and Aletinian do not want too much information to escape into the public’s hands. A disquiet hums beneath the seemingly idyllic surface of Evergreen. Whispers flit through bustling marketplaces, hinting at an enigmatic past shrouded in secrecy. Kept under lock and key by Steffy and the other main powers of Evergreen, the population never ceases to speculate what they could be hiding. Is it a secret civilization before us? Or could it be that Aletine is the secret to the lost time? No matter what the citizens say not one word has been spoken by anyone in control. And there is a good reason behind all of that which will be explained later on.
Architecture and style of Evergreen and it’s settlements
A warped image of Evergreen is fabricated when you dig deeper than what’s on the idyllic surface of Evergreen. But the kingdom is still a majestic land. Its architecture is primarily biomimicry as the villagers are very connected to their surroundings and the flora that they share the world with. The respect for nature in Evergreen is reflected everywhere, in the architecture, in the culture, celebrations and many more subtle depictions. The style that the land has adopted over the millenia is a very calming one, they believe in living life to its fullest so the architects try to make things as pleasant to live in as possible in almost every way possible. You will never find any hostile architecture in the city as its capital status means that it must show a good example for the other settlements to follow. However, the pervasive calmness of Evergreen's architecture raises questions. Could this serene aesthetic be a deliberate ploy? Is biomimicry a way to mask the secrets hidden beneath the tranquil surface? The One Hundred, with their knowledge of the lost civilization and the interdimensional threat, may have a vested interest in maintaining this facade of idyllic peace. Steffy, with his atmosphirec gem of unknown origin, might also find solace in the calming influence of these biomimicry structures. No one can know for sure but until more is learned why not enjoy centuries of perfected design and let the peacefulness wash over you as you stroll through the markets and quiet neighborhoods of the town.
The rest of the settlements
Evergreen does not have that many large towns, only about 4 main ones, Evergreen, Azalea, Heatherlea and Islafield. Those main towns are surrounded by much smaller ones but the main focus is on the four towns above.
Islafield
Islafield is, as the name suggests, mostly for farming hence the ‘field” in its name. The town is near a lake also named Isla The lake is used for fishing as well as a way to water the crops of the town. This majestic town is the main source of nourishment for the entire kingdom with 60% of its land consisting of fields and crops. The kingdom contains 5.6 million inhabitants which is a vast amount of mouths to feed and according to the way Steffy wants to run the kingdom, everyone should have the same chance with life per se he just doesn’t want anyone to starve or die before their time that is the primary reason why he allowed Islafield to become such a large producer of food. He would usually want people to get their produce from the same town in which they live in though since he has 5.6 million people to feed he made the exception that Islafield can export its harvest to the other towns. Other than the beautiful fields of flowers and crops Islafield doesn’t really hold much interest in the eye of the population of Evergreen. Though it is considered the most naturally beautiful town in the kingdom, its beauty does not help it much with population, it has been on a decline ever since the vault of Aletine became public knowledge. Perhaps the Aletinians, a secretive cult entrusted with crafting tools made of Aletine, might hold knowledge about this strange and sudden decline. Despite the dwindling population, Islafield remains a vital part of Evergreen. However, its idyllic facade now masks a layer of intrigue, begging the question: is Islafield truly just a farming town, or is it a cornerstone in a larger, undisclosed operation of the Aletinians?
Heatherlea, a town of beauty and intrigue
Heatherlea, nestled in Evergreen's north, throbs with a unique energy.This bustling town transforms into the kingdom's prime tourist destination during warmer months, welcoming an influx of 700,000 visitors. The undeniable allure? The enigmatic Ancient Hotel, an 8000-year-old structure, the oldest human-made wonder in Evergreen. However, Heatherlea's charm extends beyond the Ancient Hotel.,underneath the ancient hotel hides a vault. The most secure place in the entire kingdom. Inside of that vault is a supply of Aletine. Since Aletine is only found in that singular spot underneath the hotel a vault was built around the mine to keep everyone out of there given how precious Aletine is.Other than its main attractions, its marketplace features the kingdom's tallest stand, showcasing the rare blue and orange Heatherberry. Yet, the exclusivity of these berries in Heatherlea raises questions. Found primarily in the south, their presence here seems curiously deliberate. Is it simply a marketing ploy, or could it be part of a larger scheme? Heatherlea's vibrancy and tourist appeal are undeniable, but a disquieting question lingers: is it a genuine haven, or a meticulously crafted facade designed to distract from the secrets buried beneath the surface?
Azalea, a town shrouded in floral mystery
Azalea is known for one reason, if you look closely at its name you will notice that it contains the name of a flower. Azalea is named after the rhododendron by the same name, Azalea. This specific flower only grows in the town for unknown reasons and once again the reason for the flower's appearance in this one part of the kingdom is gatekeeped by the main powers The One Hundred, Steffy with his atmosphirec gem, and the Aletinians, each with their vested interests in the mysteries of Evergreen, all seem particularly invested in keeping the reason for the Azalea's exclusivity under wraps. Intriguingly, Azalea attracts a disproportionate number of Aletine sellers, who use the flower's beauty to showcase their wares. Why this specific town, rather than a more prominent location? Could there be a connection between the Azalea's unique properties and the Aletine gem? The motives of the sellers remain shrouded in secrecy, adding another layer to the mysteries swirling around Azalea and deepen the mystery of Evergreen.
Shadows in Evergreen: Unveiling the Kingdom's Cults
Evergreen's power structure extends beyond the readily apparent figures like Steffy and The One Hundred. Shrouded in secrecy, a network of cults weaves its influence through the kingdom. While some, like the Aletinians, maintain a relatively benign presence, crafting tools from the enigmatic Aletine, others operate with a more veiled agenda. The Heathotels, shrouded in mystery themselves, stand out for their potential hostility. Their enigmatic purpose and unknown connection to the Aletinians, an exclusive society rumored to possess knowledge on the craftsmanship of Aletine weapons, fuel speculation about their true motives. Do they cover the Aletine's power for their own gain, or are they safeguarding Evergreen from a yet-unknown threat? The secrecy surrounding these cults casts a long shadow, leaving the question unanswered: are they guardians or hidden dangers lurking within the kingdom's idyllic facade? The Heathotels: Enigmatic guardians of the ancient stone The heathotels are a mostly harmless cult. They are in charge of the protection of the Ancient Hotel and are the only ones who have full access to the vault containing all the Aletine. They seem to worship the hotel itself and treat Aletine adorned objects with the same respect as they would do to Steffy himself. They are highly secretive with the reasons on why they respect the precious stone so much and what connection they seem to have with the ancient hotel. While the other power players, like The One Hundred and Steffy himself, strive to keep the Heathotels' activities shrouded, their efforts only heighten the intrigue. This raises the question, if the Heathotels are truly a benign force, why such a concerted effort to conceal their practices? The Heathotels' enigmatic presence throws a long shadow, leaving the question unanswered: are they protectors of the Aletine and the Ancient Hotel, or are they guardians of a far deeper secret? The Aletinians: Sworn Crafters of Aletine Wonders Among Evergreen's enigmatic factions, the Aletinians occupy a distinct position. Eschewing the rigid structure of traditional cults, they follow a oath instead of a set of rules.The specifics of this oath remain a closely guarded secret, fueling endless whispers and speculation. The Aletinians, as their name suggests, possess a unique bond with Aletine. Interestingly they do not worship the Aletine but instead they treat it with reverence, viewing it less as an object and more as a potent material.The true purpose of the Aletinians is to forge everything that is created out of Aletine. They are hand picked, allegedly to safeguard the kingdom's precious Aletine supply, to ensure the safety of the kingdom’s supply of this majestic gem they can only be of a certain sanity. Once again the villagers have their own theories, whispers abound about an Aletine-infused substance used in the selection process, a method to ensure only the "worthy" wield the gem's power.Though to be granted the incredible privilege of handling Aletine directly is very prestigious as only 30 people have the privilege of handling the precious Aletine. But many things are still unclear with them as well. Why do these artisans operate outside the Ancient Hotel, traveling all the way to Azalea to practice their craft? And why, despite their seemingly benign nature, does Steffy strive to keep them hidden from the public eye? The Aletinians remain a captivating enigma, their purpose and connection to Azalea hinting at a deeper role within Evergreen's veiled secrets. The Nevergreen: Shadows Reaching for Forbidden Power In stark contrast to the Aletinians, who utilize Aletine for crafting, stands the enigmatic Nevergreen cult. Driven by a sinister agenda, they seek to weaponize the gem's power, a truth known only to Steffy and The One Hundred. Whispers abound of their attempts to breach the Aletine mine's containment, a reckless act that some speculate triggered a deadly conflict, the War Of Gods, shrouded in secrecy. Steffy himself, it seems, remains unaware of the Nevergreen's potential role in this ancient war. He and The One Hundred instead attribute it to a nebulous embodiment of darkness. The Nevergreen also strive to make the deepest secrets of Evergreen public knowledge. They are the reason why the Aletine vault became known to the villagers of Evergreen. The One Hundred and Steffy tried to cover it up by saying that the villagers deserved to know the truth of where the Aletine came from. But in reality it was an elaborate plan birthed by the leader of the Nevergreen. The identity of the Nevergreen's leader is a captivating mystery. Villagers whisper of a connection to Steffy's ancient enemy, this enigmatic embodiment of darkness. They are also rumored to have connections to the mysterious interdimensional threat looming over the kingdom, a danger only The One Hundred seems fully aware of. This raises the question, if The One Hundred knows everything about Evergreen, why do they still remain passive? Are they truly guardians, or are they somehow entangled within the complex web woven by the Nevergreen?
Gleams of Forbidden light and beauty Aletine, gem of untold power Aletine, a captivating gem shrouded in mystery, sits at the heart of Evergreen's enigmatic power structure. Its existence fuels whispers, speculation, and a fierce struggle for control amongst the kingdom's secretive factions. Here, we delve into the mystery concerning this precious stone. First of all, what are the origins of Aletine? Evergreen's bustling streets are rife with speculation regarding Aletine's origins. Villagers, known for their colorful theories, theorize that it is a form of interdimensional material, arrived here at the mysterious cataclysmic event that destroyed everything. Rumors abound of a ripped veil between dimensions, spewing Aletine into Evergreen while leaving devastation in its wake. While most of these village tales are dismissed as mere flights of fancy, the recent revelation of the Aletine vault beneath the Ancient Hotel has given some credence to the notion of an extraordinary origin. However, the truth remains shrouded in secrecy. Only Steffy and the other powerful factions possess any concrete knowledge about Aletine's arrival in Evergreen. Unveiling Aletine: Myth and Reality Clash The truth behind Aletine shatters some village myths while confirming others. While not interdimensional as some theorized, the gem undeniably originates from beyond Evergreen's reality. Its arrival coincided with the cataclysmic event that reshaped the kingdom, a truth only The One Hundred truly understands. This revelation validates a part of the villagers' extravagant theories, a devastating event did occur. However, it disproves the notion of a dimensional tear bringing Aletine here.The gem's origins remain shrouded in secrecy, fueling speculation about the civilization it hailed from. Unveiling the Secrets of Aletine Aletine is the most precious and most protected thing in all of the kingdom. The amount of secrecy surrounding Aletine is almost enough to rival the secrecy surrounding The One Hundred. With so much secrecy surrounding the gem you might be wondering why it is such a big secret. Well as explained before Aletine is hidden under the ancient hotel, the oldest building in Evergreen. Located beneath the ancient hotel, the oldest structure in the kingdom, Aletine predates all other known resources. The exact date of its arrival remains locked away in the archives of The One Hundred, who possess the sole understanding of its properties. Historically, they reveal information only in dire circumstances to safeguard the kingdom. Steffy's mansion and the main hall boast massive Aletine arches, a testament to the gem's power: repelling dark energy and matter. Steffy had the arch built in his mansion after the battle with The Embodiment of Darkness. The gem releases an aura around it stopping anything that contains darkness from passing through whatever it is built in. The shape of the arch is also a key detail to securing the room at the maximum. The arch shape lets the aura bounce off of it and spread to the rest of the mansion but in smaller quantities. Steffy and The One Hundred are the only two who possess this key information about Aletine. Aletine's potential extends beyond this defensive ability. Could it hold further, untapped properties? The possibility of weaponizing this powerful gem remains a question with potentially far-reaching consequences. Aletine’s connections Aletine is not only known to Steffy and The One Hundred. The public knows about this gem as well but so do all the cults in Evergreen. The Heathotels’s archives contain the largest collection of knowledge on Aletine other than what Steffy and The One Hundred know. A single, crucial truth about Aletine's connection to an interdimensional entity eludes even Steffy. Only The One Hundred and the enigmatic leader of the Heathotels are privy to this knowledge. Aletine is connected to some other worldly being. Since its roots can be traced to outside of Evergreen’s world, there must be some other civilisation that made contact with the gem before the Great End. Another thing to take into perspective is that Aletine is one of the oldest substances in the world. Its age could suggest a lost civilization predating the cataclysmic "Great End." Could this civilization have been the first to harness Aletine's power? The gem's connection to another world fuels this speculation. Aletine has undoubtedly passed through countless hands over millennia. Are the Aletinians, with their oath of secrecy, truly in control? Or is Steffy merely a pawn in a larger game? Perhaps a hidden organization, like a rogue faction within The One Hundred or a descendant of the lost civilization, manipulates events from the shadows. The question of who truly controls Aletine lies at the heart of Evergreen's mysteries. Aletine’s potentials Aletine reigns supreme as Evergreen's most potent gem, rivaled only by the enigmatic atmospheric gem. It has many magical properties,Its most celebrated property being the fact that it can repel dark energy and dark matter which came in handy during the War Of Gods. It can also be used for a multitude of different things. One of the most outstanding creations with Aletine is the arches in the Main hall and Steffy’s mansion. They are guarding the archives which contain precious and secretive documents on Evergreen as well as artifacts that have not been exposed to the public. With so many possible uses for Aletine only a select few are actually used. The Aletinians have been told only 6 times in the last century to forge weapons out of Aletine. With those orders coming straight from Steffy himself. With the looming interdimensional threat it is highly likely that a war will start in the next millennium. Who will be the 2 sides is still a mystery. Steffy is also worried about a rebellion, Aletine has caused unrest in the villages which have caused small riots and raids of the libraries and archives yet all of them end in failure. It is another very likely possibility that a civil war will start in the next few hundred years. The main powers may be aware of this and are preparing to defend themselves if this possibility becomes a reality. Yet, the question lingers: with Aletine's apparent defensive capabilities and no documented harm to Evergreen, why such secrecy? Are the powers hiding something more sinister? Could they be preparing for a threat far greater than a civil war, a threat hinted at by the whispers of an interdimensional entity connected to Aletine? Lempty, a gem of mysterious beauty Lempty gems, with their captivating light blue hue and characteristically rough, quadrilateral edges, are a ubiquitous presence in Evergreen. Lempty is not much of a very interesting gem. It is mostly used for decorative purposes and not very much in weapon smithing.Though it has a lack of properties, It has very famous use, Steffy himself has a 5000 year old Lempty encrusted egg. It is originally made out of the bedrock of Evergreen, Eslud, with a few pieces of Lempty embedded in it’s surface. Even with such a useless facade with no redeeming qualities, it is still widely used in architecture especially in the northern villages to portray the cold and the snow that those villages usually experience. Lempty can be found in almost every mine in Evergreen, since it is very widespread it has a very small value. Compared to Aletine it is 7 000 000x less valuable. Since it is so cheap it can be found in almost every piece of jewelry and almost every building contains even a bit of Lempty. Rumors of Lempty's untapped potential for healing pique curiosity. Though currently as mere folklore, such mystery raises intriguing questions. Is Lempty truly just a decorative gem, or is there more to its story? Perhaps Steffy's undying devotion to the Lempty egg holds the key to unlocking its secrets. The parasitic presence of Lempty throughout Evergreen hints at a potential significance waiting to be discovered. Eslud, the foundation of Evergreen Eslud reigns supreme as the most common stone in Evergreen. It literally forms the foundation of the world, as the very mines themselves are carved from this versatile material. Eslud is used most commonly in construction since it can resist high temperatures and immense amounts of pressure. The only interesting property of Eslud is that no matter how much pressure is on it, it stays flexible allowing for buildings made out of it to withstand high winds and earth-shattering quakes. It is also the stone of choice when making heirlooms since it can withstand so much damage keeping the heirloom good as new for generations. The most famous example of this is the 3000 year old Eslud box that has been passed down as the Retule family heirloom. More than just a common stone, Eslud embodies the resilience and unwavering spirit that lies at the heart of Evergreen itself. Atmospheric gem, a power of nature The atmospheric gem is the true rarest gem in Evergreen as it is only found in one place, on the tip of Steffy’s magical staff. It has the power to control the atmosphere hence the name atmospheric gem, thanks to its power to control the atmosphere, Steffy chose this gem as his crystal of choice to harness its magical properties. Though Steffy never found this gem in nature since it is a mix between Aletine, Lempty and Celusi. The exact process of how the Atmospheric gem came into existence is still a closely guarded secret with only Steffy and The One Hundred knowing how the gem was fabricated. The exact origins of the Atmospheric Gem remain a closely guarded secret. While Steffy acknowledges the possibility of finding such a gem naturally in a faraway corner of the universe, he downplays the chances of it existing on Evergreen. It takes intense heat and pressure to let it form correctly and there were many failed attempts to create Atmopsheric with the failures themselves playing a crucial role in the final product. It is quite obvious what Atmospheric does, however, how it achieves this control remains a mystery. Steffy and The One Hundred keep the details shrouded in secrecy. This secrecy fuels speculation: what truly powers the gem, and what drove Steffy to dedicate over a century to crafting it for a seemingly limited ability to control the weather? Could there be a grander purpose behind its creation, a power yet to be revealed? Celusi, the geriatric gem of Tyrlosuh Celusi is one of the rarest gems in the kingdom rivaled only by Aletine. It can only be found in Heatherlea, usually near a patch of heatherberry; studies have shown that the heatherberry benefits from the light residue that emanates from the Celusi. The major families of Evergreen usually have a reserve of Celusi to pay the more hefty fines as well as create new heirlooms for each generation. Unlike the highly sought-after Aletine, Celusi possesses no outwardly magical properties, at least to the casual observer. Steffy and the other major powers seem largely uninterested in the gem. Yet, a single, magnificent purple Celusi, a rarity in its own right, resides with the Tyrlosuh family, one of Evergreen's wealthiest and most prominent lineages, containing almost 250 current living descendants and over 10 generations are currently in the lineage which means they’re are 140 year old people in the family. Botinelosi, is the oldest person in the family standing at 164 years old and is the first person to ever use Celusi in the art of crafting. He stumbled across it while mining in the outskirts of Heatherlea near the village where the family originated, affectionately also named Tyrlosuh. Steffy originally seized control of the mine where Botinelosi found it. The quick seizure of the mine raised suspicion on the properties of Celusi. Steffy eventually allowed Botinelosi to have full control over the mine. Rumors spread through the kingdom like a wildfire, Botinelosi's silence on the matter, coupled with the Tyrlosuh family's secrecy, fuels the rumors. What truth are they hiding? Could Celusi's beauty mask a more significant purpose, a power that rivals even Aletine's? Polompty, a concoction of nature Polompty, a breathtaking gem with an allure unlike any other, shimmers with the colors of Lempty, accented by veins of Eslud embedded deep within its interior. It also comes from the same location as Celusi, near the Tyrlosuh village. By taking its location into consideration it may lead you to believe that Polompty is simply an underdeveloped version of Celusi, which is what Botinelosi originally believed when first discovering it in the abandoned Reveras mine right near the Tyrlosuh mine. Polompty was originally put under extensive studies to discover more information on it, all the studies ended up coming with one answer: Polompty is a marvel of nature, a harmonious blend of 6 different stones and gems. Which explains the presence of Eslud in its core as well as the colors of Lempty. Since it has such a strange yet intriguing beauty it captivated crafters's curiosity which caused an influx of its use to fabricate jewelry. However when Lomi, daughter of Botinelosi, became head of the family the mine was closed off to the public and all sales of Polompty stopped causing shockwaves in the gem market, sparking the infamous Polompty rush. The Polompty rush, a desperate search After Lomi shut down the mine, the supply of Polompty slowly trickled to a stop. Lomi's aged father, Botinelosi, allowed his son Bisel to sell the remaining stones stored in the Tyrlosuh archives. With the Polompty market back on its feet, the family had satiated the market’s hunger. However, Lomi had a different vision for the family's future. She declared her son, Utigo, as her heir, bypassing Bisel's claim. Bisel sadly accepted to avoid being ostracized by the family ending the power struggle for the leadership of the Tyrlosuh lineage. The gem market, unable to sway Lomi, eventually turned its attention elsewhere. It wasn't long before the Retule family, sworn rivals of the Tyrlosuh family, discovered a small grove of Polompty near their Heatherberry fields. With the supply restored, markets everywhere flourished and the Polompty rush ended. This new source rekindled the market for three years, until this supply dwindled as well. Now, with both sources depleted and demand still high, a question lingers: Why did Lomi close the mine, causing economic turmoil? Does she possess knowledge of a hidden danger associated with Polompty, or is there a deeper secret to this extraordinary gem's origin? Families of Evergreen, cults in disguise Tyrlosuh family, from gemstone guardians to fallen shadows The Tyrlosuh family is the largest and wealthiest family in the entire history of the kingdom, they originate from Heatherlea and their family founder is Botinesoli and his loving wife Temorla Tyrlosuh who had 2 children, Lomi Tyrlosuh and Bisel Tyrlosuh. Bisel was originally the next heir for the head of the Tyrlosuh family but after Lomi took power as the first heir she decided to declare her son Ugito as the next heir. Bisel accepted his fate to never be head of the family to avoid being exiled by Lomi. With her decision she completely bypassed Bisel’s bloodline from the lineage, completely extinguishing any chance for any of his descendants to ever ascend to the title of head of family. Though this has never been done in the family, Lomi received backlash from both family members as well as the public as this was seen as an unforgivable act of treason to her own blood. With her destructive decision she removed over 30 descendants from having the last name Tyrlosuh. Bisel’s new family line, the Bisenoty, decided to declare a familial war against the Tyrlosuh. Sparking the Biserlosuh familial war. The Biserlosuh Familial war After Bisel declared a familial war against the Lomi, the population of Azalea and the, affectionately named, Tyrlosuh town, started to pick sides. At the time Bisel had the most support by the villagers considering Lomi was the cause of the Polompty rush. Which brought both fortune and misfortune, and had threatened to burn villager’s houses unless they followed her orders as their new leader, which sowed distrust between the populace. The war was not particularly disastrous since it was between 2 armies of around 400 people. Though the amount of lives lost caused an impact in the surrounding area and sent a shockwave in the gem trade market since the Tyrlosuh family were the largest exporters of stones and gems. Both families ended up losing a combined 86 members, 21 from the Bisenoty family leaving only 13 people left and the rest were from the Tyrlosuh family. This disaster would leave over 1300 civilians injured and over 700 dead, it also caused the partial destruction of the town of Tyrlosuh and the complete destruction of the Bisenoty town. Though not only the family’s town were left in ruin, entire neighborhoods of Azalea were utterly ravaged thanks to the supporters of the 2 families. With Evergreen on the brink of a civil war, Steffy himself had to step in and end the war. Though his attempts failed and the war continued for another 2 years before Lomi and Bisel decided to end the battle for the safety of the kingdom as more and more supporters began to sprout and begin fighting in the other towns. With Evergreen on the brink of absolute and utter chaos, Evergreen’s main entrances were shut down and the capital went into lockdown as protests arose, those protests leading into more chaos with the 2 sides arguing and fighting right outside the Main Hall. The Tyrlosuh archives were burned, the Tyrlosuh and the Reveras mines caved in in certain parts and the majority of the Tyrlosuh made jewelry was either sold to another crafter or destroyed entirely sending hundreds of thousands of objects into the Gray Realm causing a widespread jewelry shortage as well as worries on the safety of the Gray realm. After the war ended the Tyrlosuh family was fined 400 pieces of Celusi and their entire Polompty fortune was seized by the Heathotels. Downfall of the Tyrlosuh After the end of the Biserlosuh war, the Tyrlosuh family lost control over the Polompty mine, the majority of their Celusi hoard, their archive was burned to the ground and their hometown was partially in ruins. With Lomi’s dictatorship over the family and her undying hate for the Bisenoty family as well as the Retule family, she forced the Bisenoty family, which was ravaged by the war, to merge back into the Tyrlosuh family name, unifying the rivals and stopping any further familial civil wars from happening. Bisel decided to step down from the lineage and instead become the first person in the history of Evergreen to not be part of a family, whether it is big or small. With Bisel now gone Lomi had no one to challenge her in her dictatorship of the Tyrlosuh family. Until Botinelosi, founder of the family, decided that the lineage had embarrassed itself enough and removed Lomi as ruler. But Lomi refused and since Botinelosi was in his early 160s he couldn’t fight back against her and allowed her to continue her rule. The public had already lost interest in the family and was now fully against it destroying any hope of any new ruler to repair the damage caused by Lomi’s reckless decisions. The Tyrlosuh family, once revered, now exists as a cautionary tale. Their fall from grace serves as a stark reminder of the dangers of unchecked ambition and the devastating consequences of family discord. However, whispers still linger. Is Lomi truly broken, or is she biding her time, waiting for the opportunity to reclaim her lost glory? And what secrets lie buried beneath the ashes of the Tyrlosuh archives? The answers to these questions may hold the key to the Tyrlosuh family's redemption or their complete downfall. Retule family, fruit fanatics or fantasy fighters? The Retule family stands as a beacon of peace in the often-turbulent world of Evergreen. Unlike their gem-obsessed counterparts, the Tyrlosuh, the Retules view conflict with a deep aversion. Witnessing the devastation of the Biserlosuh War solidified their pacifistic stance. They famously disarmed themselves, donating all their Aletine weaponry to the Aletinians. But they still needed to make a profit, so their founder, Ruservi, created the Reveras mine right near the future area for the Tyrlosuh mine. Ruservi was the first person to explore and exploit that part of the kingdom since it was usually used as a tourist attraction for the rest of the towns to visit the lovely northern flora. He eventually discovered a cave which led into a large cluster of Celusi, which eventually led him to create the Reveras mine to mine out this new source of gems for the kingdom. After extensive testing his scholars noticed that Celusi had positive benefits to Heatherberry and enhanced its growth which led Ruservi to found the largest Heatherberry farm in the history of the kingdom. He led the family into a fruit empire for 140 years until he grew too old to lead the family anymore, at his 178th cycle he decided that his son Rymo would become the new leader of the Retule family. This decision came after the end of the Biserlosuh war which started a large change of ruler in many sections of the kingdom, families were giving way to new rulers and the cults were discussing the leaderships. Steffy decided to join in the massive leadership change adding new managers into the departments and a new Head Librarian into the archives. By the end of the leadership changing era Ruservi had already been ruler of the Retule family for a few months, during those few months he had commissioned the construction of a new town for the Retule family and everyone else who wanted to live there. Though this new project was a cover up for a more devious plot, he was in fact commissioning the Aletinians to forge Lempty weapons for his descendants, which caused distrust in the family after news of this plan came into the light. This revelation cast a shadow over the family's pacifistic ideals. Was Ruservi preparing for a war he alone foresaw? Or was there another, undisclosed reason for the clandestine weapon production? These questions continue to plague the Retules, a family caught between their commitment to peace and the shadows of a hidden agenda. Gatosi family, shadows of the kingdom Hidden within the bustling kingdom of Evergreen lies the Gatosi family, shrouded in secrecy and wielding a power unseen. The Gatosi are in charge of the safety of the archives which explains their secrecy and low popularity amongst the populace of Evergreen. They do not have any famous appearance nor have they ever participated in a war since their founding 3000 years ago. Their founder, Guvn, created the family after he noticed the amount of hate that the concealed archives would get from the public. Forever haunted by the everlasting threat of misuse in the archives. He decided to found a new family that would be in charge of protecting these archives and maintaining their secrecy. But considering the fact that Guvn founded the family over 3000 years ago it means he is long dead, he was 343 at the time of his death which leaves him as the longest serving Head Of Family in the history of the kingdom. They originally were treated with hate because the archives were seen as a threat thousands of years ago. But nowadays the archives are a staple in the culture of Evergreen. Captivating the public’s knowledge on what could be hiding in those labyrinth-like buildings. Now, nestled away in the secluded neighborhoods of Islafield, the Gatosi cultivate their unique Yoern vegetables, rumored to enhance mental clarity, a necessity for navigating the labyrinthine archives. While whispers of their reclusive nature follow them, the Gatosis family silently fulfills their role, the shadows of the kingdom their only companions. Fruits of Evergreen, source of nourishment and mystery Heatherberry The humble heatherberry is a ubiquitous presence in Evergreen's northern villages, especially Heatherlea, its namesake. This incredibly common fruit harbors a rare variant, the purple and orange heatherberry found only in one singular farm in Heatherlea. The farm’s owner has kept their identity to protect this incredibly rare variant of heatherberry. The whispers of Evergreen have always condensed into a wide array of conspiracy theories, in this case they believe that the heatherberry is a mystical edible stone that was brought to the kingdom from the forgotten civilization before Evergreen. Despite repeated debunking. A plethora of people still believe that this outlandish theory is true. The purple and orange heatherberry has been widely known for its rarity but also for its properties. The purple and orange heatherberry has been subject to multiple tests, including Eshwar Mestec’s famous 7676AGE experiments. Controversy and mystery cling to the heatherberry, yet it remains the kingdom's beloved snack, a daily indulgence for an impressive 96% of the population.
If you took the time to read everything please give me feedback or some sort of constructive criticism please

We met once at his birthday celebration. When we were still together. I knew he was eyeing for you since you are attractive. Without a doubt, I was mesmerized by your beauty as well, and I saw that as a chance to finally end that relationship. I joked with you that "you could have him, he's toxic anyway." I wasn’t wrong though. You ended up dating and having a baby.
Fast forward to now, I came across your tiktok account, and there were no posts from you, just reposts from other accounts explaining the situation you were having. Cheating, living with a narcissist-pathological liar, and being emotionally, verbally, and mentally abused. I feel so sorry for you since I have experienced all you are going through. Don't get me wrong, I don't pity you; it's just that I wish you knew that I went through everything he made you feel while we were together. He was disrespectful to my parents and his mom, always came to our house intoxicated, and I was always afraid of what he would do if I did not accompany him because he had anger issues. Perhaps this is why I experienced trauma bonding with him. Idk, if he shared this with you, but we also had a baby.
That was our difference. You chose motherhood, I didn't. When I found out I was pregnant with him, I immediately informed him, but we didn't talk for almost a month. Do you know what he told me when he found out? "Mag-PT ka ulit, baka niloloko mo lang ako para bumalik ako." (ew) but I was afraid back then; I thought having a baby with him would change him, but it didn't. He still cheated on me despite knowing the fact that I was pregnant, so I decided not to continue my pregnancy because I had so many ambitions and couldn't risk them for someone who is incapable of loving. That includes both of us. I wasn't ready, and I couldn't imagine him being a good father to my child, nor could I because I didn't know how to love myself. Before that decision was made, a lot of “fixing” happened, I begged him several times, cried, and was still called insane while going through pregnancy just bc I was asking for assurance..
When I finally decided that there were no hopes for us, I finally blocked him everywhere and he was calling me thru his mom’s phone number— It was chaotic, and the only thing on my mind at the moment was that I needed to get rid of 'this' because my kid did not deserve what he was about to see, if he made it. I went to the OB alone and was terrified. I took three fcking PTs, and they were all as clear as water, indicating "positive". However, when they were checking up on me, the physicians informed me that they had trouble finding the baby's heartbeat. Yes, it was ectopic.
Am I a bad person if I felt relieved? Because I did. I was in anguish, too. I felt compelled to blame someone, so I did. Still branded me "crazy" and he had the audacity to say, "Kung di ka lang sana nag-isip nang nag-isip." After losing my kid, I never went back, but I still sobbed every fking day, wondering how in the world I could have met someone with no heart. I never even got an apology. Until December 202, he was following one of my best friends and saw me on her story, he sent my best friend a DM to introduce me to him again— that’s when he began booty calling me again. I met with him while I was still in the process of moving on from him and the trauma bond remained strong. I had no idea you were already with him at that moment, till the morning that you were bomboarding him messages and calls at 6 a.m. That’s when I knew. I saw myself in you. I went home feeling ashamed and disgusted with myself. I cried myself to sleep because I did not know anything, he fooled me once again.
I’m sorry. I was about to confront you, but shame consumed me. I never intended to hurt another woman. But believe me, I never met him again despite of him sending me messages every now and then asking where I was, if I was available, and anything else you can think of while you and him were together. The only thing I want from him is my money, which he owed me! Puro yabang ng mga kotse at gamit niya pero wala naman yang pera! Ako pa nagpapa-gas diyan, kapag "sinusundo" niya ako, at nanghihingi yan saakin ng gcash para sa luho niya. Damn, I was so stupid.
But, anyhow, all I wanted to say was that while this may sound cliché, you did not deserve it, all the pain and self loathing. Scrolling over your reposts, I see you're also in pain because of your baby daddy. I am very sorry that you and your kid had to meet a monster. If you and him are still together and came across this, and the patterns remain the same. Do me a favor: get you your baby out of that boy's life because HE WILL NEVER CHANGE. I hope your find the strength to walk away because you don’t need someone who makes you feel unworthy of the right kind of love. You deserve a love you ought to give, and nothing less.
Perhaps he told you about how I was the toxic one? Heck, I was. It's because he cheated on me several times, lied straight to my face after crying and running to me to come back, and still managed to hit up on girls while knowing I was pregnant—I've had trust issues and anxiety as a result of him, thankfully your existence freed me from that situation. It was never easy, I asked all the questions of why did that happened to me— who had full of love in my heart, but shattered to pieces after offering a love that’s genuine. But I did, I was able to walk away. I hope you will too.
Girl, I sincerely hope that things will work out for you in the long run. Losing my angel, opened my eyes, and I pray it will do the same for you and your little one. I apologize if I also caused you pain. You deserve a love that is safe, calm, and at peace. Most of all, your baby do not deserve a father like that, you’ll both do fine on your own.
Please save yourself; no one will. I dodged a bullet, unaware that you would be the one to catch it. Please, just live even if it feels like dying; I promise you, it will be over shortly. Above all, prioritize your own well-being. We never deserved it; no one ever does. From woman to a woman, I am rooting for your healing. ❤️‍🩹

healing #relationship

So yeah as the title says I think it's time to go. I'm 39 and I've had an average life. I have an amazing wife and 2 beautiful kids. I just don't think i can hang on because of them. My life is pretty plain. Have a job that is toxic and they don't care, I know I'm easily replaced sure it pays well but I know I'm not going anywhere in it. I know someone will comment like just change your job, it's kinda hard when you hear people losing theirs and unemployment rising. But what about your mates I hear you say to yourself I don't have mates I'm the guy who never gets the Hey mate keen for a beer at the pub etc Nah I'm the one always asking and as always nah not really fussed about a beer etc I know a lot if people and that's where it ends. It just seems everyone is leaving and doing better things where I'm still the same person and in the same place I was this time last year, just existing, i feel like i have nothing happening. I daydream alot and talk to myself i can feel something. REM was right it's easier to leave than to be left behind.I know someone will comment oh the universe/God has a plan for you blah blah blah then tell the universe/God what's your plan Where am I heading.. give me something, please !!!!!! Anyways not really a question or anything just a vent I guess

i F20 saw my boyfriend M19 secret tik tok account full of saved and liked videos of very pretty girls and even girls i know from high school. all of the videos are the basic thirst trap, showing off boobs and butts. it broke my heart to see because i always felt so pretty with him, and now i’m self conscious about my body because i don’t look like them. i’m not paper thin, i don’t have boobs, and i have a man butt. the opposite of these girls. there are hundreds of videos i saw and the watch history timestamps go back months. he went on that account 2 days after our anniversary. it hurt even more to see pretty girls i knew from high school. when i confronted him he tried to lie and say it was an old account. when he finally admitted to going on the account he told me he was so sorry and that he only has eyes for me. he’s done nothing but compliment me since i found it but i don’t know if he means it or because he has to. he unfollowed all the girls that i recognized on social media which makes me feel better. i honestly wish i found porn because that has less meaning than this. i saw girls i personally knew, and the videos are girls you would see in public unlike porn. he’s in a frat too and we go to different schools so this situation makes me even more worried and self conscious. i might be overreacting because i know men look at women differently than women look at men. he never commented or reached out to any girls, just looked, but i can’t get over this sick feeling. am i overacting? how do i get over this? i just want to feel confident and beautiful with him again.

Any recommendations for semi-stimulating activities for more quality leisure time on days you cycle off medication?
context: On Rx Adderall, I enjoy sufficient productivity, exercise, and healthy eating 4-5 days a week. I'm gratefully in a place of life as well to be spending the bulk of my days working towards my dream career. That is to say, I'm not dealing with the anxieties and pressures of foregoing my honest desires in life in exchange for grinding to survive (as I have for pretty much my whole life until now). That predicament (depression resultant from denial of passion) was a big contributor to my prior "fuck it all" day habits of binging on junk food/ dopamine- mining if you will.
So, in my flow state on the medicated days, I enthusiastically fill my time with highly stimulating intellectual podcasts concurrently while studying/ practicing art, running very long distances, and writing challenging material (lately it's focused on evolutionary theory, consciousness, and societal issues). This is only possible because I cycle off 1-2 weekend days no meds/ no expectations.
HOWEVER, herein lies my tragedy: the crash from cycling off is crippling, suffocating, and inescapable. I'm also very atypical for my demographic (30 y/o woman no kids, career transition) and don't have friends I can call up to pull me out of the fog. I do live with my partner who is rad but neurotypical and if I declare "slug day", he's soooo in, further endorsing this behavior I'm trying to break.
Thanks for indulging the rant. I'm curious if anyone has found an enjoyable middle ground between the high cognition level stuff and utter depravity/ gluttony/ isolation. FWIW, I'm in the inland northwest, where we have about 5 beautiful months and the rest are pretty much spent inside. THANK YOU.

My husband (I’ll call him C) and I just bought our first home a few months ago. We were so excited, we got a great deal because the homeowners were eager to get out. Our friend is an inspector and made sure everything was in tip top shape with the home- told us the roof needed to be replaced and the homeowners immediately had it replaced and we went in contract. I wondered why they were so eager to leave… (to paint a better picture they were asking 395 and sold us the home for 300). C said jokingly I bet the house is haunted! But we didn’t care about that as we just moved from an apartment that was built in 1890 and was originally the town morgue. Anywho, we finally met the sellers to go over a few details of the home. The wife ,Alice, wore J.Crew head to toe, had long beautiful curly blonde hair and jingled from her charm bracelets. Her husband, James, was super shy and didn’t really talk. He was about 6 ft, extremely thin (almost skeletal), bald, and wore round thick black framed glasses and a sweater vest. He let Alice take the lead on showing us the home but he stayed close by with a smile on his face. At the end of the meeting Alice walked us outside to our car and after wishing us luck on our new venture- in the same breath mentioned they were moving because James was sick. We felt so bad for them, that they took such a pay cut to get out of their home and with how frail James looked and not having a single hair on his face or head, we could only assume he had cancer.
Fast forward 2 months and I had finally unpacked the last box. C and I were finally feeling settled in as well. C travels for work, 3 weeks out of the month to be exact. It’s always worked for us, I love the alone time and we cherish the time we have together. Thunderstorm nights definitely make me miss him though, and I cant watch any scary movies by myself knowing he won’t be home to sleep with me. Anyways, one day when he was out of town I was at home folding laundry in the living room. As I was getting up to grab a basket I noticed someone was standing at my front door. I couldn’t see who it was since we have some sort of marbled glass, and I definitely didn’t hear a knock or bell. I quickly walked to my room to wait out the solicitor. Then I remembered one of our neighbors sons was supposed to be going around the neighborhood to sell something for school so I walked to front door and no one was there. Shrugged it off. Then 2 days later I was watching a movie getting ready to fall asleep when I heard our garage open…. I quickly reached for my gun and followed my dog to the laundry room to peek into the garage, I opened the door, gun in front of me and searched the garage. Nothing. I looked outside and saw a car driving away down the street. Far fetched but I decided to ask my neighbors across the street if I could check their camera footage. Cameras weren’t working. Ugh.
I told C about what was happening and when he came back in town he put motion sensor cameras all around our house and quickly installed our ring door bell camera. And we took a trip to the gun range for target practice. He left town again the following week. All went smoothly until the last night of C’s work trip. I was laying in bed and saw through my closed blinds all the motion light detectors go off one by one in our back yard and then my dog jumped up right as someone started to jiggle our back door handle. I once again grabbed my gun and said to myself, I’m done with this shit I’m going to figure out what’s going on. I call the cops first, and they write it off as kids because of the neighborhood I live in but assure me they will send a unit out. I can’t wait, I go through the side door and enter our back yard. The motion light next to me turns on and I look across the yard by the back door there’s a man standing in the shadows. He doesn’t move an inch, hence why the motion lights are not on around him but I could see the outline of his body.. tall and slender… then I could see a shimmer- glasses? I yell out “I am armed and police are on the way so I suggest you don’t make any sudden movements” The motion light next to me turns off. It’s damn near pitch black outside, but I hear footsteps in the grass. I again yell “I have a gun, and I will shoot if you come near me” footsteps stop. I wave my hand to set off the motion detector. Light comes on. It’s James. The original owner. Standing 20 feet from me, smiling. I say “James, are you ok? What are you doing here?” No response. Only smile. As my mind races on what to do I hear the gate open behind me and footsteps… I spin around gun pointed to see April. I say “what the FUCK is going on” As she raises her hands in a surrendering fashion she says “I’m am so sorry, I saw James’ car was gone and knew he would try to come here… James has early onset Alzheimer’s… we moved so we could be somewhere more secluded without as much neighborhood traffic and I just didn’t realize he would have an issue with the move…”
Cops showed up. Told them everything was fine. Told April I can’t handle her husband showing up at my house anymore and she assured me it wouldn’t happen again…
James still likes to visit at night.
Side note: I have a relative with Alzheimer’s and understand how devastating the disease is and this whole situation is so sad. But as a woman living alone majority of the time…. Hell nah.

For context I did an SMP and only applied to two schools through my masters linkage program, Albany Med (MD) and NYITCOM (DO). I got automatically accepted through NYITCOM (and sent in my deposit) and just got off of AMCs waiting list. From the outset I want to say that I really do not care about the title of DO vs MD. I’ve worked in an emergency department for 3 years scribing and I have literally never noticed any difference between any of the ED or specialist providers I’ve known.
I am in love with NYITCOMs campus. I also want to do emergency medicine. My choice basically boils down to this:
NYIT: Much nicer area, beautiful beach towns and really close to home (1 hour away) and my extended family. I love the campus and their facilities are really nice. There is a really chill vibe from my tours/interviews.
AMC (2 hours away): Tuition is overall 20k cheaper over the 4 years and housing is insanely cheaper. I did my masters in Albany and got housing for $400 a month. In old westbury it’s $1000 if you’re lucky. Plus you have 3rd and 4th year clinical set up for you at the hospital attached to the campus, whereas you have to schedule that for yourself at NYIT through applying. And not that I give a shit about this, but the DO stigma does still exist.
TLDR: Basically what I think I’m asking is, am I crazy for wanting to go to NYITCOM? On paper it seems like AMC is the smarter way to go, and I can’t make up my mind.

I took my exam yesterday (May 18) at home, and I found out today I passed 3AT! I did not believe I was going to pass. I absolutely thought I had failed and was planning on when to take the exam again. Like others, I thought I would share some of what I did and some recommendations especially if you are taking it at home. Of note, I used to work with college students and teach them how to improve their academic skills (not memorizing but mastering material, not freaking out at an exam, etc) so I wrote this with academic coaching in mind.
Things That Helped Me/My advice:

• Not believing all the "just take the test at a testing center" negativity. Taking a test at home (if you like your home) has some big benefits. This isn't to say everyone should do it, but if you want to do it, here is why it helped me:
  • I get it, lots of folks have bad experiences testing at home. A lot of things can go wrong and they aren't in your control all the time. But, I work from home 99% of the time and know my internet is reliable, I dont have interruptions, etc.
  • Theres a HUGE benefit in taking the exam in a place where you are very comfortable. If you have test anxiety, this is something to consider. I didn't have shoes on, I wore comfy clothes, I could control the temperature how I wanted, etc
  • Studying and taking your practice exam in the same environment as the actual exam can be another benefit, as this can help jog your memory! There is some science behind this.
  • You can use ALL of your break time. One of the things I saw in some posts where folks took the test at a testing center is the check in/out procedures ate up a chunk of their break time and sometimes the bathrooms seemed far. So they barely had a break. I actually chose to end my breaks early because I was able to relax and take the entire break as a break.
  • I had zero interaction from anyone at Pearson. No one sent me a chat (I didn't reach out either), I didn't have any issues while taking the exam, etc. This isn't good or bad, but just putting it out there that I felt like I was just taking an exam at my house like it was any other day.
• Learning Stuff!
  • Take practice exams...many, not the same one over and over though. Its ok to repeat them (I did) but dont take 1 practice exam 3 times and think you are ready.
    • As you get closer to the exam, take practice exams simulating the actual exam environment as much as you can - stick to the time limits, take 2 ten minute breaks, dont check your phone, etc
    • Review your correct and incorrect answers - know WHY the correct answer is the correct one. This is what can take the most practice because you have to think like the PMI wants you to think
  • Know the terminology - the SH+ games are great for this, specifically the Crossword but it wont capture all the terminology you need to know.
  • Use all the resources people mention here because one of the best things you can do is use different formats of learning to take in information - especially if it repeats itself!
    • Some folks learn best by writing things out, some learn best by hearing it, etc. Most people learn best by ALL of these things together. You probably didn't realize in K-12 that your teachers were using many modalities to teach you stuff. Think like a K-12 teacher and create a lesson plan with many different activities on the same topics and review it over and over (each review in different modalities that work for you)
    • Example - for one topic - Watch the videos folks suggest, and read through the notes from Third3Rock, make your own flashcards and talk it out
    • Talking it out is an underrated/under utilized learning modality. The purpose of this is acting like you are teaching someone else. Some of you might be able to teach another person like your roommate, partner, or child. But if you dont have a human or a pet to teach PMI topics to, get a plant, a pillow, a ghost, etc. Talk the topic out as if you are explaining it or having a conversation about it with another person. If you can't explain it to someone else, you dont know it enough.
    • I am someone who learns by writing things out. Not typing (although I do learn that way), literally writing. But if you are like this too, make sure to put it IN YOUR OWN WORDS. Dont just copy whats on the screen/paper on a index card.
    • Create your own visuals. Not of everything. Just the stuff YOU know you need to see/read again. There are some great visuals out there already too!
    • A few days before my exam, I re-wrote some of the main concepts I wanted to remember on larger pieces of paper (printer paper) with colorful markers. This included topics/questions I wasn't so confident on, important terminology, etc. I used a lot of paper...and then I taped them to the walls in my hallway. I didn't put them in my office because I knew I'd have to take them down before the exam and I didn't want that stress. So I put them in the hallway and would pause and read them, talk them out, dance while singing the topics, etc. Its like an information radiator for yourself and again, there's science behind how these things can help some people learn.
  • You dont need an expensive "bootcamp" or pricey course to learn this material. With the amount of free or cheap options out there (all the things you see mentioned in this subreddit), you dont necessarily need to shell out a lot of money for anything else. My work paid for an expensive bootcamp. I did it and wasn't impressed. It was like drinking from a firehose and the worse way anyone can learn information - hearing someone talk at you for 8 hours a day for 4 days in a row. I dont recommend this at all. I did not use my notes nor resources from this bootcamp for anything. There could be better bootcamps out there - I've had a few friends have better experiences. But we all used other free/cheap resources to learn in more detail.
    • If you really want a course, some of the courses folks have mentioned here (Udemy, etc) that are self-paced are likely far better to learn initial information just for the fact that you can go back and review the information in a lot of detail/re-watch videos, etc.
• There are differences between the PMI Study Hall practice exams and the actual exam. You're probably think, OBVIOUSLY there are differences! Here are the ones I observed:
  • The actual exam questions were not as wordy/long as the practice exam questions. They often had very little information in them and yet you had to make a decision as if you knew all of the context. But also dont assume anything!
  • Many of the questions had answer choices where 2 were extremely similar to each other and seemed correct
  • I only had 2 matching questions and no math/calculations
  • I felt like I failed the very first section. These questions were HARD right out of the gate. I dont think this section had any easy or moderate questions in it. I literally thought I had failed the whole exam because of this and was planning on when to retake it. Note that while this was my first section, it may not be in that order for other people. All the people saying, "there were no expert questions on my exam" - yeah, not mine! And I did relatively well with expert questions on the practice exam. I am aware that there are experimental questions on the exam which dont count in your score. Maybe these were it, I am not sure. But damn, this section was hard.
• Actual Exam Week/Day Prep
  • If you have been intensely studying for a bit, you need a break before your exam. This is even more true if you work full-time, have a family, etc. Your brain can literally only have so much energy and if you are exhausted going into the exam, you will not be functioning at your best.
    • The week of your exam, only do light review. This means, maybe one practice exam but like the beginning of the week. Or no practice exam. Review the concepts you miss a lot, review terminology. That's it.
    • Eat well for you. Dont push yourself with workouts unless thats your norm. Get good sleep in the days leading up to the exam. Drink a good amount of water not just the day of/day before the exam.
  • Schedule your exam at a time where you know you tend to feel more energized, and more relaxed, if at all possible. For me, even if I am more awake in the morning, I knew having an exam first thing would give me a lot of anxiety the night before and I probably wouldn't sleep then I'd do bad on the exam. I scheduled my exam at 1:15pm on a Saturday. I slept in a little, had some coffee and a leisurely breakfast, reviewed some things, then I was ready.
  • Talk nicely to yourself - with how much all of this can cost, and whatever other pressures you may have, there can be a lot of "I have to pass, like HAVE to pass!" pressure. Of course we all want to pass the first time and be done with it, but thats not to worry about right now. Talk nicely to yourself - make those encouraging sticky notes and put them around your house, or meditate, etc. but make sure to remind yourself how hard you have worked, and how capable you are. Your only focus is to do your best and thats all you can worry about right now.
  • If you are someone who reads out loud as you are reading questions, you need to practice not doing this. Its probably best to practice this before the week of your exam, but if you dont have that time you need to practice the week of your exam for sure.
  • Right before the exam/as the exam starts
    • The program will give you an intro to how it works. Like where is the timer, where are the buttons, how to highlight, etc. Do it. Do all of the silly things you probably already know how to use. As you are doing it, take deep breaths and exhale slowly at least 3 times. If your heart rate is going up, just pause and do some circle breathing (breath in deeply, hold 4 or more counts, breathe out SLOWLY like for 8-10 counts, then breathe in again, do it again). You do not have to rush into this exam. You have plenty of time.
    • Use the whiteboard tool to write stuff down that is just ruminating in your head. It should stay there through the exam. Get it out of your head because the more you try to hold it all in, the more stress that creates. Write triggers for yourself or draw your beautiful drawings you were practicing with. Again, this helps your memory noggin do its thing and can get out some of that anxiety you are feeling.
  • During the exam
    • Dont let hard questions get you down. This is challenging, even for me who generally does well with test taking. Know that not all questions actually count toward your score. If you have a hard question, do your best, mark for review, and move on. Dont let it cloud your confidence. I literally thought I failed the whole exam because of the first section it was so hard. But I ended up passing 3AT!
    • Take the breaks. Dont try to be a hero. Breaks can be a good reset for your brain! Take them, and take the whole time if you need. Drink water. Have a snackie. Do some breathing and stretches.
    • Watch the time. This is important so you aren't rushing at the end, and also why you dont want to waste a lot of time on a few hard questions. Regarding time, I purposefully went fast when I was practicing to make sure I could still answer correctly under duress (and also I didn't have a lot of time for 4 hour exams while practicing). Most of my practice exams I finished in 1.5 hours and I scored in the 70-80% with expert questions. In the actual exam, I took about 3.25 hours.

I hope this helps someone out there. Sorry it was long but glad you made it to the end!

From 13-18 I dated a girl. Beautiful, smart, loyal, and basically perfect. Her parents never let us see each other much and we only ever had sex twice, but it was what it was. I treated her like shit because I was convinced something was up. I had this voice in my heart saying something was off every single day no matter how it seemed to my eyes. So I treated her horribly. I never cheated on her. Constantly accused her of cheating on me. Told her I cheated on her to try and make her reveal whatever she was hiding out of anger or as revenge. I never got anything. When I was 18 I had to leave Caldwell and move to winnfield. She told me she didn't love me anymore and left me for somebody else. It fucked me up so badly that I couldn't think of anything but her for a good year and a half. Completely destroyed myself for how I treated her and tried to become somebody who would never treat anyone like that again with her being my big life lesson. Always dreamt of reconnecting and getting to be a part of her life again because, you know, she's so pure and wonderful and the most beautiful girl blah blah blah. FF 10 years and I'm spun out on dope fighting with my ex and see her on fb. Send a request and she accepts it. Huzzah. Happy fucking day. I hold back tears and thank the holy father and maybe even a little pee dribbles out. It was a big moment. She's still married to the dude. Wow. Thats rare these days. I guess she is still pure and radiant angel. Their marriage goes to poop because he wants an open relationship and gets her to do all kinds of stuff to unfamiliar penises and he muff dives into strange waters and she dont like it. Hmm. Okay. She is a pure, godly woman. Clearly. Hmm. Much yes. Much yes indeed. So she accepts my apology and we talk and talk and talk as friends. She even meets Amy and they love each other. (God I would give anything to have her back so she could hear this shit). Anyway. I go to jail for crime. When Amy passes and after I start eating and living again, I start writing Alexandra. We have a pretty consistent back and forth and we have so much in common and I'm marveling at it. Thinking all of these wonderful feelings from the forgiveness and beautiful friendship I've found with somebody I'd hurt so badly. I can't stress enough how much these 10 years of her memory molded who I am. I tried so hard to use It to be a better person and as a testimonial to how my paranoia isn't a healthy thing and leads me to such hatefulness. I'm going on way too long so I'll wrap it up. I get out of jail, we keep talking, become best friends and she confides in me that her dad raped her the whole time we dated. Then gradually little hints and things she said and did so long ago reveal the truth that she was willingly cheating on me with her dad and only had sex with me when he came in her and she needed to potentially pin a pregnancy on me. Her nudes were always taken by somebody else and one time she told me i was her own personal porn star and i never knew what she meant untill now. She justifies it as helping her parents marriage and has no idea how badly this shit is all effecting me.She has a whole old man fetish that she hints at and I show her a picture of my dad yesterday and it comes out that she was talking to him too while we were dating. Never said a word to me while we were together about it. I barely know my dad. We met one time and she was with me. I guess they hit it off while I was pissing. 10 years of guilt buried that deep have impacted who I am as a person so profoundly that I don't know how to unravel it and remove the pieces while processing and letting go of how I was justified in my feelings and that now the one friendship I wanted more than anything with somebody I programmed myself to hold so highly now has absolutely no value to me now. Idk. Maybe im not articulating myself on that as well as I could but I'm so confused and don't know which layer of my emotions to do what with first. It seems stupidly shallow and idiotic of me to be so caught up with this, but in my empty little life this really hit me hard

I have seen quite a few posts about worries for graduations re: protests escalating, and I thought I would offer my take for anyone less familiar than I with campus and our community, for example anyone living far away who is coming back for graduation, or who is in another part of the city and does not visit on a regular basis.
My take, with some context: My family of 3 lives, works and studies on campus. We have lived here for 8 years. I have passed the encampment a number of times (let's say 6) including on the first day it was set up because I was curious. I also walked past the bookstore protest while it was taken over (this was by accident, I was just out and about in that area).
I have a graduation on Thursday and have no worries about attending. This not my first graduation from UBC, and I have a child who will be attending, so I wouldn't think twice about skipping it if there was any sort of risk. I would not put my son in danger and I've done the ceremony multiple times before. Obviously none of what I say is legally binding, and I will happily admit I am wrong should things go differently than I am anticipating, but I really do not see the situation getting out of hand. Even if there is a demonstration at or around the Chan.
The media/news makes the encampment seem much bigger than what it is. The encampment is contained entirely to the field, it's peaceful, quiet, and you can't see in. I did not count but the bookstore protest had (when I saw it) no more than 20 protesters (more like 15) who were just chanting and sitting outside and inside the doors. There were about 5 cops outside who were all on their phones.
Disclaimebias: I generally support the right to protest on campus, divestment by the university from funds that support unethical practices, and lack of police involvement (conflict resolution by other means) when possible. I am not directly involved with the protest. I have encountered protesters on campus (such as at the Nest and Tim Hortons), but haven't seen an overwhelming amount in my daily life.
If I don't attend my graduation this week, it is more likely that I am too annoyed at paying $80 to rent that robe again than because I am worried about protests escalating. I might be wrong, but if you are looking forward to celebrating your achievements with your family, I am fairly confident you will be able to enjoy your day.
The point of the post was just to give my take for anyone who is worried about their graduation this week. My undergrad graduation was, for me, a very special event and I am happy to have attended mine and that my family came.
There so much wealth on campus and it is so ironic to be writing this missive from such a beautiful place while death and destruction befall many innocent folks in a different place. We are also colonizers in this space and I am complicit in that.

I bought cricut sticker paper before I came here and saw crafters having nothing but issues with it.
I just got through with my sons birthday decorations and I kept getting the error message saying the machine couldn't read the marks.
I was in a pinch so I said f it I'll cut it like card stock and peel backing off.
LO AND BEHOLD IT WORKED!!!!
it peeled off beautifully. A perfect pressure cut.
Just wanted to share in case anyone is stuck with or accidently bought the non favored kind.
Their transfer tape is horrid though I tried it once and tossed the whole tube in the garbage. I ended up placing each individual piece of vinyl because it sucked so bad.
I'm on an android so I don't have access to the numbered pressure cut settings so finding their version of what I need is another challenge. Just had to share !

Is it right to bully a girl just because she isn't attractive enough for the role? The amount of hate she is getting is crazy. They say Juliette was supposed to be a white women, then be more specific and cast Italian actors, do voice in Italian why speak English? People bullying her saying she isn't beautiful enough or not racially accurate are just looking for excuses to Bully her!!

As the title says . I don't want to go back to my normal life. I love each and everyone of you crazy mother fuckers. I hope to be back next year.. Literally choking back tears, everything was so beautiful and wonderful and I want you all to know you're loved. That's all ❤️

I had a previous post talking about a friend I had with DID. He was constantly cutting me off and really being nasty to me. I think that post was made back in DecembeJanuary?
Now it's May, we haven't been friends for months as he has blocked me on everything since I had called him out on what he had said to me. I don't want to put exactly what I said or screenshots of our conversation god forbid he's on this subreddit, but when I asked him what was going on, he refused to explain, and I had to end the friendship.
I asked him around one or two months ago if he'd like to try again with the friendship. He sent me a brief message stating that he could never be friends with me again because I hurt him, and once again refused to explain what exactly I did that lead to that.
I don't know if there's a way to salvage the friendship. I have no way of contacting him except through a mutual friend (if that even counts). I was thinking about having her say something, but I feel as though it's very immature of me and a lost cause.
These last few months without him have been awful. He was the closest I had to a best friend. He had a lovely smile, I'll never forget it. I've thought about him nearly every day. The host and I were the same person. We had the same humor, same taste in music and hobbies, he was supportive most of the time. I thought we had a great future, possibly even one that lead to us being more than friends.
I know I couldn't include all details, but I guess my question is, if I were to make a friend with DID again, what could I do better? I've done a lot of research on the disorder, and I've mentioned that my friend did not want to seek therapeutic help (not sure if that had anything to do with it). I don't know if it was truly something I fucked up, or if there were too many odds against us.
I miss him so much. Every single piece. I didn't see him really as personalities, I mean I did, but I thought they were all just a part of a beautiful thing that I don't have anymore.

im new to Reddit so I apologize if im doing this wrong, i think im asking for advice/opinions.. im 21f and two or three years ago i started hanging out with an old friend again after a few years, it was right after a serious relationship for me so honestly i was just rebounding and having fun with an old friend. Anyways.. after about a month of hanging out everyday with him and his friends, and three hookups later, hes driving me home and says “ive started talking to this one girl recently and id feel bad if we kept seeing each other while I pursued her”. Very understandable, i told him thats no problem, no worries and that were all good. That was the last i heard of him until a year later. 

After about a year, im back together with the ex i was hung up on while rebounding with (well call him jake). Im at the mall with my friend and i get a “hey girly” text from a girl well call sara. Anyways, sara proceededs to say that her and jake were dating and she thinks jake was cheating on her with me, she then said when she found out abt the cheating he cried and said that while he tried to break it off with me, i “screamed and cried” and said “i love you, ill off myself if you leave… that I assaulted him during one of our hookups. I was blown away.

Sara clarifies and assures me she knows the truth and that hes a lying cheating loser and i fill her in on what really happened between us, keep in mind, I know woman can hurt men like that, but the three times we hooked up I was stomach down face down the whole time and it was during a very sickly time in my life, I was under 90lbs. It just wasn’t possible unless i drugged the mf somehow, he was very big… anyways, after that jake tried reaching out to me to hang out again and i literally said “if i assaulted you why would u wanna hang w ur abuser?” And blocked him after that. 

For the next year n half Sara and I aren’t close friends but we are mutuals and frequently interacted via instagram, the typical liking posts and replying to stories… i didnt start noticing anything off about Sara until it was basically too late, essentially it started with a TikTok she reposted on instagram saying something like “when she copy’s you” idk just something along those lines. I cant tell you why i had a feeling it was about me, but i did.. i ignored it and immediately pushed down the idea that she posted that directed towards me, i remember thinking to myself “there’s no way, i mean we’ve had literally no issues lol”.. and i mean her and i are still interacting completely normal still atp.

i cant remember how long after the TikTok repost till the indirect, direct posts, started getting really personal. Things like “the girl they cheat with is always uglier.” But it really started going downhill till i noticed.. no matter what time it is.. 4am..1pm.. she was my first instagram story viewer, without fail, everytime. 

In my head at this point im just thinking like “yk i post a lot, its not weird, maybe she’s just really active like me” during this time im really just trying to avoid the truth which is, that girl isn’t my friend, her and I weren’t close but i hold friends more dear than anything and i always have, she went through something hurtful that i was involved with and although i didnt know she and jake were together i felt i owed her loyalty and at least someone that’ll be real with her.
Now im getting to the main event.. i know.. this is already insane enough. Trust me. Anyways very very soon after i clock it that Sara is always my first viewer, thats when the eerily similar post come up. It started with random little things, and maybe thats why it took me so long to notice but it started with me posting a picture of a bush outside and, im not joking, two minutes later after being my first viewer, posts a SOMEHOW “prettier” (subjectively) bush than i posted. Then id post a selfie in a certain pose and minutes later shed post the same exact thing of herself. By this time ive NOTICED what’s slowly happening but I truly didnt want to believe this shit again im thinking to myself “youre not that bitch, why would someone COPY you” i mean this girl is pretty! Smart! Insane daddy’s money! Why tf would she be pressed over me, at the time i was sick and depressed and lowkey Emo.

the basically blatant copying continued for a few months, i really didnt want to bring it up and it had gotten to a point where i was thinking of this situation pretty often, it made me feel gross and weird and mean, i felt mean thinking she’d copy me. It was horrible. I had gotten Into a new Relationship at this time and i was just ignoring it until one day i lost a picture of a hummingbird and the caption says “omg a hummingbird has never been so close to me” those birds are very important to me they remind me of my grandmas old cottage. NOT EVEN A WHOLE 2 MINUTES GO BY and she posts a video of a hummingbird flying CLOSER to her. 

That was the breaking point for me honestly, i didn’t say anything to her nor post anything bout her, i simply unfollowed her on instagram and that was that, I unfollowed her and refreshed her account 5 seconds later SHE BLOCKED ME. It had all clicked, she was on my account all day. Everyday refreshing my account, always my first viewer, post exact lookalikes to what im postng, purchasing clothes and random things i own. It was all on purpose and she knew what she was doing. But that was that, what’s done was done and i moved on, literally forgot about her existence.
UNTIL THREE MONTHS LATER i get a. Message from one of those fake phone numbers saying “come get ur man girl” and sends a photo of my bf at the time liking a body photo of Sara’s on instagram. Now I wasn’t mad at the obviously photoshopped screenshot, like that shit was fucking stupidly photoshopped the fonts were completely different, i was mad about her HUNG UP on me. I replied saying stuff like youre nothing but a spoiled brat who cries when she doesnt get her way, i said she complains about these things in her life that she causes herself, all the drama she was in and i blindly defend her, somehow she was always in beef with ppl that stalked her and copy’s her an all these People want to be as rich and pretty and smart and funny her and they cant so they hate her, i said you are the evil one and now i see it, you cause these issues and when people defend themselves or disengage with you because of your behavior towards them you blast them on social media painting them as the bag guy because you know people will blindly believe you. I said much more in much better wording but thats basically that.. AND BOY DID SHE NOT LIKE THAT

here begins the relentless posting of me, she’s posted blatant insane lies like im a pedo and a racist,, that i support mass genocide and im a rapist, im a stalker who wants to be her so bad but ill never be as educated and wealthy and ill never have a good job and will be a lifeless loser my whole life. INSANE SHIT LMAOO, i entertained it for a while, shed post lies and id post “un actually here’s what happened” and she’s post my post and cover out the parts she sounds bad and only post the parts where I admittedly went wrong, but like i willl literally admit Where i said sum I shouldn’t have so wtf. 

This cycle goes on for months, she contacts these older girls who previously had beef with me and had them give her all my information so now she’s signing my phone number up for the national guard, my address, my full name and family’s name. She’s actually lost her mind atp, it’s been two years and biweekly she Post about. me, pushing this narrative that im all these things yet has no proof to back up anything, even tho i have timeline proof of my posts then hers, i buy something then she buys it after, saying Vietnamese noses are ugly. Proof of her asking for my information. She has her army of blinded losers constantly stalking me along with her and talking about me, texting me talking all this ignorant shit and ive sat here all by myself just flabbergasted, for the first year it really did get to me, id feel sick, i felt the need to prove to her and her instagram followers that im not who she’s saying i am, and even she herself knows that. I eventually just stopped fighting back, i stopped trying to clear my name and clear the air.. i learned she’s a Narcissist , no matter the response. She’s going to feed off of it, i’ve been nice, i’ve been rude, i’’ve been empathetic, and ive been cruel. nothing stopped her and im afraid nothing but time will.

This started when i was 19 and i’m now 21, i’’ve called the cops but since this is classified as “cyber bullying” there’s no laws and nothing they can do, after learning i called the cops on her she started posting about a case she’s making against me for defamation which is confusing bc i never told a lie, she did. I notice After two years she just projects everything, her deepest insecurities are right there if you look, it’s what she brags, and shows off the most, herself. She has everything, anyone could want and need yet she’s still so Miserable, yet me, broke as fuck, pretty but nothing to brag abt, i don’’t materially have what she has and she thinks because of that i created this whole mess, but ive always been richer,, im happy with myself, im content most days and thats incredible, i have the most beautiful friends who love me. And would die for me, family i adore. I have everything. The great job, the loads of money and gucci purse can fucking wait, thats my even what i want truly, i want to be a mother. there’s much more detail but this post is already so long and draining, i honestly dont know what to say, I haven’t gone on her account in months but ill still hear and see screenshots every now and then of what she says, the most recent one was yesterday and its that i apparently have been calling her little brothers phone, who’s also a minor. Just untrue, honestly sinister, evil shit. Evil person. And i regret befriending her..