Hey folks, after re-watching the gameplay overview I had some ideas I wanted to share.
Edit: I only wanted initially to share the first few ideas but I started rambling and decided to keep going lol, most of these are just throwing random ideas at the wall and I don't expect them to be implemented at all but thought it'd be fun to share them for the sake of discussion. Enjoy.
1: train station or bus stop - used to travel to different neighbourhoods or "Districts" it takes time to reach different districts so a Para will basically vanish for like an hour or more once they enter the train or bus before they emerge at another district.
2: Districts - Given our Paras will likely be living in a city, it makes sense there are different districts that offer different kinds of work. Jobs in these districts have different benefits and drawbacks like being higher paying but more stressful or offer benefits but can effect a Para's health. For example, a business district where corporate offices are, an industrial district or an agricultural district on the outskirts of the city.
3: benefits and drawbacks of location - we all want to live within a quick walking distance from work (or at least we want out Paras to do so) however I feel like there should be benefits and drawbacks for this in equal measure. For example. To live in the business district, rent/apartment prices are through the roof, so if your Para is a run of the mill office drone they're gonna need to commute, but an executive or CEO lives in their business district luxury apartment or even penthouse (either paying the high rent or as a perk of the job). The industrial district is cheap as dirt but rife with crime where Paras would be rightfully hesitant to go outside at night. The agricultural district isnt cheap but is affordable with wide open spaces and clean air allowing for Paras to farm, earning thrir own money but services available in the inner city aren't available there. So no ordering pizza for dinner and your Para better get some self-reliance skills cos the repair workers are days away, not minutes or hours and emergency services are hours away.
4: crime - crime irl isn't just break-ins in the dead of night, you might get a group of thieves breaking into your house in the middle of the day when your Para's vehicle isn't present so they think they're gone. They break in by either picking the door lock if you remembered to lock it or by throwing a rock through the window or glass door. As well as this you might get mugged while out at night, so investing in some pepper spray and security glass windows and doors (or if you can't afford that, multi-lock doors and barred windows) if you live in a bad part of town.
5: effects on Paras like drunkenness - your Para just got a promotion! Time to par-tay! Go out to the local bar, get sloshed, make a fool of yourself on the dance floor, make out with a stranger and stumble home in the early hours of the morning, your Para's inhibitions are gone meaning not only are there more interactions to have with other Paras and objects in the world (which, if they're not similarly sloshed won't appreciate it one bit) but your Paras become harder to control, if you give them a command but either it takes too long for them to get to the location of the command or something catches their eye they'll cancel it and do something else, making the stumble home an adventure in and of itself! But having another Para to lean on makes it a lot more manageable. However the next day brings the hangover, when they wake up all stats are reduced to 1 and they slowly get them back throughout the day to simulate a hangover. Coffee can speed this up. The embarrassment though? There's no quick and easy fix for that. Especially if your Para hooked up and must make the morning walk of shame.
6: police - Police should be more than just "show up and beat up the burglar" if an item was stolen you should be able to make a report, the longer the time between the item's theft reduces the % chance the police will be able to recover it, if you report it directly after it was taken and your Para saw the thief, you have a 90% chance to get it back, but if you left it for a day and didn't see the thief, it's 5%. Also if your neighbour is being a loud jerk blasting music all night when your Para needs to be at work in the morning, you could call in a noise complaint.
7: cardboard boxes at the start - during the gameplay reveal it showed a brand new Para with a bunch of boxes around their apartment, this got me thinking of how they could be utilised. I figured they could actually be sorta like semi-randomised low cost items to furnish your house with the only parameters being that they give you the basics you need to start a life like a bed, wardrobe, a table, a chair for each household Para, a fridge, oven, cabinet, toilet and shower + a few random items like a bookcase and a couple rugs. All very cheap variants, the logic being that these are all cheap second hand items that tend to be mismatched, encouraging players to do away with them as needed.
8: haunting - if Paras after death can haunt a place, let's not make then Sims ghosts but make the place of their remains generally "haunted" those with traits that don't make them immune to supernatural paranoia start getting, well, paranoid like they're constantly being watched, small items will occasionally fall off shelves and tables in the dead of night, random footsteps could be heard again in the dead of night, shadowy figures might appear and vanish in dark areas, closed doors could swing open etc... Paras who are effected by such things will need to pick up the urns of dead Paras and take them to a cemetery or contact an exorcist to drive the ghost from their house. Which, on that note....
9: Cemeteries - Cemetaries should start off as a largely empty lot save for the grave keeper's house/office, in-world reason being that this is a newly established cemetery as the old one is full. Loved ones aren't inturred simply by taking the urn out of the Para's inventory and putting them on the ground, instead the Para takes them to the grave keeper who for a fee will take them off the Para's hands and ask them when they'd like the funeral to be held. Post-funeral can include a wake which is like a party but loud music and alcohol are severely frowned upon and as long as such taboos aren't breached the party's rating (if there is such a thing) will by default be "it was OK, 5/10" and can be increased by offering food and drinks.
10: Schooling - we should be able to enroll toddlers into pre-school and there should be a way to get our kids into private or boarding school. Preschool gives your toddler basic social and logical skills as well as freeing up your adult Paras to go back to work and it's cheaper than a nanny. Private school, while expensive, gives your children both more skills and the friends they make are the children of bosses around the city, giving them a massive leg-up if they go to work for their friend's parent's company and giving your adult Paras a way to get to meet their children's friend's parents too which can likewise give them a big career boost too. Boarding school gives the highest skill gain in areas you select depending on the school you send them too and your Para's children's friends are the creme of the crop, the children of the most elite, if your Para is in business, their kid is rubbing shoulders with the children of the CEO and basically guarantees their career will shoot up at least a few levels almost immediately and before long they'll be on the board of directors. You know what they say, it's not what you know it's who you know. But remember, getting your kid into a private boarding school costs several hundred $$$ a day. You won't be able to afford it on a Barrista's salary.
11: A bad crowd - your Para might take on a... less civil path in life, a life of crime. Starting out as a petty thief or street thug, their life is one of high risk and high reward. This line of "work" isn't gained through a newspaper but through 2 ways. 1: you find the local crime boss and ask for a chance to prove yourself in which case they'll tell you to rough up or steal from a wealthy Para in town or 2: you make connections after being arrested while in prison. After you get out you may get a call from a fellow former inmate saying "hey I hear you know (inmate name) and he says you're a good guy, come down to (location) we may have work for you". The life of crime is one of high risk and high reward, the rich looking guy you shake down on his morning stroll might net you a few thousand in one go but you run the risk of getting pepper sprayed which effects you until you wash it out or getting arrested or even worse, of failing the boss. Ignoring or failing a task from the boss carries with it a heavy burden of risk, however you can become an informant and if you succeed in getting incriminating Intel on the boss and telling the police you may go into witness protection. What's that? You get put in a random new town with a new name, you keep your skills and money but your old connections, your job, your most prized possessions etc... are all gone.
12: job qualifications - as my irl uncle says "get them Quals, son!" The jobs you can get with no qualifications to your name are typically low paying, low demand jobs with not much room for advancement and after all expenses are taken care of, not a great amount left for spending. You might get higher pay for working night shift but that's not where the real money is to be found, for that you need qualifications for jobs with the potential to advance and make something of yourself! For this you need to go to either community college or college/university. While community college would give you the qualifications and skills needed for higher paying jobs with less stress like as a tradesman or being able to start your own business (doing so is not expected at launch), college/university opens the door to the high life of extremely high paying jobs (starting at the ground level) from business CEOs to jobs in media and more. While I have zero expectation of these things being implemented on launch, they could be off-map sites or rabbit holes until then.
13: story progression - last and certainly far from least, I wanna see the world grow and change around my Para, for other Paras to at least give the illusion that they're living their own lives separate from my household's, I want my para's friends and neighbours to be having kids, getting promotions or switching jobs, for some of my Para's childhood friends to wind up in prison or making bank or being the chef at their favorite restaurant. The last thing we want to see is a stagnant neighbourhood where a Para's best friend when they were a child becomes their grandchild's best friend without them aging a day.
Phew, that's about it, what do you guys think?

We will be 2 years na this. First year of our relationships may mga napapansin na ako. There was this one time na I saw na may chikinini sya sa leeg. I confronted him but he said na kagat lang ng lamok and na allergy. I didnt buy it pero hinayaan ko nalang. Then there was this time na naiwan nya yung twittex account nya na naka logged in sa laptop ko. kasi minsan hinihiram nya yung laptop ko to check on socials or emails. I saw na he has been chatting to a lot of other guys. I even saw a chat from his ex na sinabi nya blocked na nya before. He deleted all those messages eventually. another thing, before he allows me to look at his phone, but this past several months ayaw na nya ipahawak sa akin yung phone nya and he is always keeping his phones near him. kaya mas nag duda na ako.
Then lately he has been doing a lot of overtime. Suspicious na ako, until I managed to guest yung pin and pattern code ng phone nya. So nung gabi na i checked on his phones, at first wala ako nakitang mga chat sa messengers na nag checheat sya until i tried searching keywords and messages from different people showed up. Sya pa nag iinitiate to meet up and there were lots of unwholesome conversation. He placed those chats under a restriction para hindi lumabas agad. I also discovered na may FB Dating account sya and dun nya na meet yung ibat ibang guys. even in viber may mga kausap sya. I discovered na nakikipag kita sya sa hotel sa guy na malapit sa amin. (btw we live together sa bahay ko). and every day may ka sabay sya pumasok at umuwi. Also he has an ongoing thing with someone who is also taken. ( may boyfriend din yun guy). When i checked yung mga dates those were the times na okay naman kami, wala kaming issues or any big arguments. He constantly say na mahal nya ako sobra sobra.
when i discovered yung cheating spree nya i realized hindi totoo yung mga sinasabi nya about how he loves me and how he wants to marry me if given a chance. tiginin ko he is keeping me because i am convenient and useful. he is staying at my house rent free and food is free too. Galit ako but not to the point na need mag scandal. I want to end this relationship pero kumukuha lang ako ng timing. im older sa kanya ng more than 10 years. He is around 25. How should I do it? naisip ko na pagsamahin sila sa isang GC nung mga ka cheating buddies nya then dun ko i laydown lahat or inisip ko na ilabas lahat ng gamit nya pero ma scandal yun.
should i give him 1 month to look for a place na lilipatan? i think kahit mag apologized sya hindi ko na sya mapapatawad. More on awa na lang nakikita ko kasi breadwinner sya and maliit lang sweldo nya and dami pa demands ng family nya sa kanya. pero hindi ko naman pede hayaang ma yurakan yung self worth ko. I need a 3rd voice, please share your thoughts. thanks.

personally from where i live (im from somewhere in Southeast Asia) in the early 2010s (2010 - 2014), not many people could afford Smartphones (Apple, Samsung, etc etc) & some still stayed using cellphones like Nokia (My dad used his Blackberry until around 2012 with his new iPhone 4), people drove a mix of cars from the 90s & 2000s, reruns of 00s cartoons you could recognize on TV, some computer shops & schools still used Windows XP until around 2015 while Windows 7 is dominating, some people still used digital cameras, iPods are still somewhat a thing?, Netflix haven't made it to my country & we still used Cable TV & DVDs, some still use CRT TVs while almost everyone start to have Plasma TVs, elements & leftovers of Frutiger Aero still remain, radio sometimes play music from the mid - late 00s, 7th gen of gaming consoles are still popular, Some places that haven't been renovated since like 2008 but later did in the mid 2010s, some homes still use cordless landline phones, Domo kun was still everywhere, Rage comics were still the norm & MLG rising, Swag culture (although its more early 2010s itself but its sometimes associated with "Jejemon" from where im from), Electropop is still popular & EDM is on the rise, etc.
I guess i could say its somewhat? an extension of the late 2000s but with the rise of smartphones. I would say all of that remaining elements went down from 10 - 0% from around mid 2015 ish, but thats just probably me.

I F(27) and M(28) got into a big fight. My fiance proposed to me last November 2023, recently we got into a big fight and for the background napaka dalang namin mag away. We are already 8years in relatioship and currently living in.
We recently got into a fight na kahit anong sorry ko di tinatanggap, lagi lang nyang sinasabi na antayin mo lang yung oras makikipag settle nako sayo. And then, nagpunta ako ng barangay in the middle of the night kasi na trigger ako na parang may inaantay lang sakin para makipag hiwalay and iwanan ako.
Then whenever i try ko ask for forgiveness nauuwi lang sa away. Nasuntok ko kasi yung braso nya, dahil pinag sisigawan ako.
One time, nag aaway kami out of nowhere nabanggit nya yung babaeng ka trabaho nya while we are fighting instead of calling my name. Iba nabanggit nya, which make me histerical kasi naka hotspot sakin yun dahil yung babae palibre ng palibre ng kape pero di naman daw nya nililibre. Nagkakapag usap sila because nasa support team ng operations ang jowa ko. I see their convo sa messenger.
And then ayun nag umpisa nakong kutuban. I’m always checking his phone pg may time then one time nag prompt sakin yung sabi ng ka workmate ko, kahit gaano ka linis may maiiwan at maiiwan pading bakas. Then na check ko may TG sya na ginamit wayback before and alam ko yun dahil nasabi nya sakin nag install sya for video sharing purposes sa work. And then, one time on checking andun na yung contact ng babae pero di naka save sa phone book nya. Yung babae is may asawa din pero di pa nag kaka anak mula sa long tern relationship.
So na prompt ako na para akong kinabahan. Then since wala akong TG ginawa ko pinasave ko sa friend ko yung numbers nila and ayun parehas silang online sa oras na yun na kinagulat ko kasi di naman nag T-TG tong si M(28)
and then, ginawa ko unsynched ko yung contacts para mawala yung contact ni girl dun then ayun the next day andun nanaman sa synched contacts kasi wala naman sa PB yung number nya. Kaya i doubt talaga.
When i confronted si M(28) about why using TG, di daw sya gumagamit nun and don’t know how it works and why he is online. And then, wag ko daw syang akusahan kasi kakasuhan daw nya ako porket di ko daw ma resolve yung pag aaway namin inaakusahan ko syang may third party para ako daw ang biktima. Now, naka unstall na yung TG sakanya. But still nag aaway padin kami and mas madalas nya akong di kinakausap. I must hurt his feelings nung nasuntok ko sya. If kayo yung lalake what is your thoughts about this.
He also said to me to cancel the wedding. Nag oo lang ako kahit ang sakit sakit kasi ako sumusuyo sakanya. Feel ko ang laki ng kasalanan ko sakanya. Nag so-sorry lang sya sakin minsan kasi napagod daw.
First time to post, sana maintindihan nyo. Any opinion po about dito?

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Peter Pan Return to Neverland HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Philadelphia 4K/MA $5.5
Pick 1 (Black Christmas '18 4K, Dog's Purpose 4K, Sparks Brothers 4K, Raw, Agnes Bourne, Antz, Being Frank, Loving, Don't Let Go, Kicks, Final Account) HD/MA $4
Pinocchio '40 HD/MA $4
Pitch Black (Unr) 4K/IT $4.5
Pitch Perfect 3 4K/MA $5
Pixels HD/MA $3
Plane 4K/VU $5.5
Poor Things HD/MA $7.5
Pope's Exorcist HD/MA $5
Prey for the Devil 4K/VU $5.5
Priscilla HD/VU $6
Punch-Drunk Love 4K/MA $6.5
Purge 4-Film Set HD/MA $12
Queen & Slim HD/MA $4
Quick & the Dead '95 4K/MA $6
Rambo First Blood HD/VU $4
Rambo First Blood Pt 2 HD/VU $4
Rango HD/VU $3
Real Genius 4K/MA $5.5
Red Rocket HD/VU $4
Red Sparrow HD/MA $3.5
Renfield HD/MA $5.5
Requin HD/VU $4.5
Resident Evil Welcome to Raccoon City HD/MA $4
Robin Hood '73 HD/MA $4
Rosemary's Baby 4K/VU $6.5
Rhythm Section HD/VU $3.5
Ruby Gilman Teenage Kraken HD/MA $5.5
Rudy (Dir Cut) 4K/MA $6.5
Rudy 4K/MA $6
Run Lola Run 4K/MA $6.5
Saint Maud HD/VU $4
Samurai Jack Complete Series HD/VU $40
Saw 8-film Set (Unr except Jigsaw) HD/VU $20
Secret Life of Walter Mitty HD/MA $3.5
Shaun of the Dead HD/MA $4 or 4K/IT $4.5
Shaun the Sheep HD/VU $3.5
Shrek 6-Film Set (1-4, Musical, Puss in Boots) HD/MA $19
Skiptrace HD/VU $3.5
Scorpion King 4-Film Set (1, 3, 4, Book of Souls) HD/MA $12
Scream 3 4K/VU $5.5
Scream 5 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Scream 6 4K/VU $7 or HD/VU $5.5
Sharktopus HD/VU $3.5
Shazam 2-film Set HD/MA $8
Shazam Fury of the Gods 4K/MA $6 or HD/MA $4.5
She Said HD/MA $4.5
She's the Man HD/VU $3.5
Sin City HD/VU $4
Silver Linings Playbook HD/VU $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Sixteen Candles HD/MA $3.5 or HD/IT $3.5
Sleepless in Seattle 4K/MA $6
Smile HD/VU $4.5
Social Network 4K/MA $6
Sometimes They Come Back...Again HD/VU $4
Sometimes They Come Back...For More HD/VU $3.5
Sonic the Hedgehog 2 4K/VU $5.5
Spartacus 4K/IT $4
Spider-Man Across the Spider-Verse 4K/MA $7 or HD/MA $5.5
Split HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Spoiler Alert HD/MA $5
Spy (Unr) HD/MA $3
Star Wars A New Hope HD/MA $4
Starship Troopers 4K/MA $6
Step Brothers 4K/MA $6.5
Stillwater HD/MA $4
Studio 666 HD/MA $5
Sum of All Fears 4K/VU $5
Supercell HD/VU $4.5
Super Mario Bros Movie 4K/MA $6.5 or HD/MA $5
Superfly HD/MA $4
Suspiria (2018) HD/VU $4
T2 Trainspotting 4K/MA $6
Talk to Me 4K/VU $6
Talladega Nights 4K/MA $6.5
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Out of the Shadows HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Thanksgiving 4K/MA $7.5
The Bay HD/VU $4
The Color Purple '23 4K/MA $8 or HD/MA $6.5
The Creator HD/MA $6
The Descent (Unr) HD/VU $4.5
The Flash HD/MA $5
The Last Dragon 4K/MA $5.5
The Marvels HD/MA $6.5
The Natural 4K/MA $6
The Other Guys 4K/MA $6
The Professional (Ext) 4K/MA $6
The Space Between Us HD/MA $4
The Sting HD/MA $3.5
The Super '17 HD/VU $4
Ticket to Paradise HD/MA $4.5
Titanic 4K/VU or IT $6 or HD/VU $4.5
Top Gun Maverick HD/VU $4
Toy Story 3 HD/MA $4
Trading Places 4K/VU $6
Transformers Rise of the Beasts 4K/MA $7 or HD/VU $5.5
Trolls 3-Film Collection HD/MA $12
Trolls Band Together HD/MA $6.5
Tusk HD/VU $4.5
Umma HD/MA $4.5
Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent 4K/VU $5
Underwater HD/MA $4.5
Unfriended HD/MA $4
Universal Monsters 4-Film Set 4K/MA $17
Up '09 HD/MA $4.5
V for Vendetta 4K/MA $6.5
Vanilla Sky HD/VU $5.5
Varsity Blues 4K/VU $6
Velvet Goldmine HD/VU $4.5
Venture Bros Radiant is the Blood of the Baboon Heart HD/MA $5.5
Violent Night HD/MA $5
Walking Dead Season 9 HD/VU $7
Watchmen Ultimate Cut 4K/MA $7.5
Waxwork 2 HD/VU $3.5
Welcome to Marwen HD/MA $4.5
Welcome to Monster High HD/MA or IT $3
Whiplash 4K/MA $6 or HD/MA $4.5
White House Down HD/MA $3.5
Whitney Houston I Wanna Dance w/ Somebody HD/MA $4
Wicker Man 4K/VU $5.5
Wish HD/MA $7
Witch HD/VU $3.5
Woman King 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $4
Woman Walks Ahead HD/VU $4
Wonka HD/MA $7
You're Next HD/VU $3.5
X HD/VU $4
X-Men 1-4 Set SD/MA $7.5
X-Men Trilogy (X-Men, X2, Last Stand) HD/MA $11.5
Zombieland 4K/MA $5.5
Zombieland Double Tap HD/MA $4
All other movies (A-Z)
10 Cloverfield Lane HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
101 Dalmatians '61 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
13 Hours HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
14 Blades HD/VU $3.5
1917 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
2 Guns 4K/MA $4 or HD/MA or IT $2.5
21 Jump Street HD/MA $3
22 Jump Street HD/MA $3.5
3 Extremes HD/VU $4
3 From Hell (Unr) 4K/VU $4 or HD/VU $2.5
3:10 to Yuma 4K/VU $5
31 HD/VU $2.5
47 Meters Down HD/IT $3.5
47 Meters Down Uncaged 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
47 Ronin HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
600 Miles HD/VU $3.5
71 HD/VU $3.5
A Christmas Story 4K/MA $6
A Dog's Purpose HD/IT $3
A Good Day to Die Hard (Ext) HD/VU $2.5
A Journal For Jordan HD/MA $4
A Quiet Place HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
A Walk Among the Tombstones HD/IT $3.5
A Wrinkle in Time HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
A.C.O.D. HD/IT $3.5
Abominable 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
About Last Night HD/MA $3
Ad Astra HD/MA $4
Adaptation 4K/MA $6
Adverse 4K/VU $5
After Earth HD/MA $3
Aftermath HD/VU $3
Air Force One 4K/MA $6
Aladdin ‘19 HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Aladdin ‘92 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Alien HD/MA $4
Alien Covenant HD/MA $2.5
Alfred Hitchcock 4-Film Set Vol 1 4K/MA $18
Alfred Hitchcock 5-Film Set Vol 2 4K/MA $21
Alien 6-film Set HD/MA $16
Alita Battle Angel 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
All Eyez on Me HD/VU or IT $3
All is Lost HD/VU $3.5
All the Money in the World HD/MA $3.5
Allied HD/VU or IT $3.5
Amazing Spider-Man 2 HD/MA $3.5 or SD/MA $1.5
Amazing Spider-Man HD/MA $3.5 or SD/MA $1.5
American Assassin 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
American Hustle HD/MA $3.5
American Ultra HD/VU or IT $4
American Underdog 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Anatomy of a Murder 4K/MA $5
Anchorman 2 HD/VU or IT $2.5
Angel Has Fallen 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Angel Heart 4K/VU $5.5
Angel of Mine 4K/VU $5.5
Angry Birds Movie HD/MA $3.5
Anna Karenina HD/IT $3.5
Annie ‘14 HD/MA $3.5
Annihilation HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Antebellum 4K/VU $5
Antlers HD/GP $3
Ant-Man & the Wasp HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Ant-Man HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Apache Junction HD/VU $3.5
Apollo 13 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Arctic HD/MA $4
Arrival HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Art of Self-Defense HD/MA $4
Assassination Nation HD/MA $3.5
Assassin's Creed HD/MA $3
Assignment HD/VU $4
Atomic Blonde 4K/IT $4.5 or HD/MA $3
August Osage County HD/VU $3
Avengers Age of Ultron HD/GP $3
Avengers Endgame HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Avengers Infinity War 4K/MA $4 or HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Baby Driver HD/MA $4
Backdraft 4K/MA or IT $5.5
Bad Grandpa HD/VU or IT $2.5
Bad Words HD/MA or IT $3
Bandslam HD/VU $4
Bank Job HD/VU $3.5
Barb & Star go to Vista Del Mar HD/VU $4
Barbie & Her Sisters in the Great Puppy Adventure HD/IT $3.5
Bart Got a Room HD/VU $4
Battle Royale HD/VU $4.5
Battleship 4K/MA or IT $4.5 or HD/MA $3
Beauty & the Beast ‘17 HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Beauty & the Beast ‘91 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Bedknobs & Broomsticks HD/GP $3.5
Before I Fall HD/VU or IT $3.5
Begin Again HD/VU $3.5
Beiruit HD/MA $3.5
Belly 4K/VU $5.5
Ben-Hur ‘16 HD/VU $3.5
Between Worlds HD/VU $3.5
Big Hero 6 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Big Lebowski 4K/MA or IT $5.5
Big Short HD/VU $3.5
Big Wedding HD/VU or IT $3
Billy Elliot HD/MA or IT $4
Birdman HD/MA $4
Black & Blue HD/MA $4
Black Christmas '19 HD/MA $4.5
Black Panther 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
Black Panther Wakanda Forever 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
BlackKklansman HD/MA $4.5
Blacklight HD/MA $4
Black Widow HD/GP $3
Blackhat HD/IT $3.5
Blair Witch Project ‘99 HD/VU $4
Bleeding Steel HD/VU $3.5
Blindspotting 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Blood Money ‘17 HD/VU $3.5
Blood Ties HD/VU $3.5
Blue Jasmine HD/MA $3.5
Blue Ruin HD/VU $4
Blues Brothers HD/MA $4 or 4K/IT $4.5
Bob's Burgers Movie HD/GP $3
Body Cam HD/VU $4
Bohemian Rhapsody 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Bombshell 4K/VU $5
Book of Life HD/MA $3.5
Boss Baby HD/MA $2.5
Bourne Identity 4K/IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Bourne Legacy HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
Bourne Supremacy HD/MA $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Bourne Ultimatum 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Boy ‘16 HD/IT $3.5
Boy & the World HD/IT $3.5
Braven HD/VU $4
Breakfast Club HD/MA or IT $4
Breakthrough HD/MA $3
Brian Banks HD/MA $3
Bridge of Spies HD/GP $3.5
Brothers Bloom HD/VU $4.5
Bumblebee 4K/VU or IT $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Butler HD/VU $3
Cabin in the Woods HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Cake HD/MA $4
Call of Wild 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Calvary HD/MA $4
Candyman '20 4K/MA $6 or HD/MA $4.5
Candyman 3 HD/VU $4
Captain America Civil War HD/GP $2.5
Captain America First Avenger HD/GP $3.5
Captain America Winter Soldier HD/GP $3.5
Captain Marvel 4K/MA $4 or HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Captain Phillips HD/MA $3.5
Captain Underpants First Epic Movie HD/MA $2.5
Carol HD/VU $4
Cars 3 HD/GP $2.5
Casablanca 4K/MA $5.5
Case for Christ HD/MA or IT $2.5
Casper HD/IT $4
Celebrating Mickey HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Chaos Walking 4K/VU $5
Chappaquiddick HD/VU $4
Chasing Mavericks HD/MA $3.5
Chicago HD/VU $4
Child 44 HD/VU $4
Children ‘08 HD/VU $4
Christopher Robin HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Clerks 3 4K/VU $4.5
Clifford the Big Red Dog HD/VU $4
Cloverfield 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Coco HD/GP $2.5
Cold Pursuit 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Collection HD/VU $3.5
Collide ‘17 HD/VU or IT $2.5
Colma The Musical HD/VU $4
Colombiana (Unr) HD/MA $4
Colony 4K/VU $5
Come & Find Me HD/VU $4
Commuter 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Company of Heroes HD/MA $4
Conspirator HD/VU $4
Contraband HD/IT $3
Contractor HD/VU $4.5
Cooler HD/VU $4
Cool Hand Luke 4K/MA $5.5
Cooties HD/VU $4
Cotton Club Encore 4K/VU $5.5
Countdown ‘16 HD/VU $3.5
Courier 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Craft Legacy HD/MA $4.5
Criminal HD/VU or IT $3
Croods HD/VU $3.5
Cruella HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Crypto 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Daddy's Home HD/IT $2.5
Daddy's Home 2 HD/VU or IT $3
Damsel HD/VU $4.5
Dangerous 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Danny Collins HD/IT $3.5
Dark Crimes HD/VU $4
Darkest Minds HD/MA $4
Dark Places HD/VU $4
Dark Tower HD/MA $3.5
Darkest Hour ‘17 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes HD/MA $3.5
Deadpool 2 (w/Super Duper Cut) HD/MA $4
Deadpool HD/MA $2.5
Death of Me HD/VU $4
Death on the Nile HD/GP $3
Death Wish '18 HD/VU $3
Deepwater Horizon HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Deliver Us From Evil HD/MA $3.5
Dentist 2-Film Set HD/VU $7
Despicable Me 2 HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Despicable Me 3 4K/MA or IT $4.5
Despicable Me 4K/MA or IT $4.5
Detroit HD/MA $3.5
Devil Inside HD/VU $3.5
Devil's Due HD/MA $3.5
Die Hard HD/MA $3.5
Die Hard 5-film Set HD/MA $18
Die in a Gunfight 4K/VU $5
Dirty Dancing 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Disney Animated Short Films Set HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Disneynature Monkey Kingdom HD/MA $3
Django Unchained HD/VU $3
Doctor Strange HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Doctor Strange Multiverse of Madness HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Dolittle HD/MA $3.5
Dom Hemingway HD/MA $3.5
Don Verdean HD/VU $4.5
Doorman HD/VU $3.5
Doors 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Downsizing HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
Downton Abbey A New Era HD/MA $4
Downton Abbey The Movie HD/MA $3.5
Draft Day HD/IT $3.5
Dragged Across Concrete HD/VU $3.5
Dragonslayer 4K/VU $5.5
Dream a Little Dream HD/VU $4
Dreamkatcher HD/VU $4
Dreamworks 10-Film HD/MA $25
Dredd 4K/VU $4 or HD/VU $2.5
Dying of the Light HD/VU $2.5
E.T. Extra Terrestrial 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Early Man 4K/VU $5.5
Earth Girls are Easy HD/VU $4
Eddie the Eagle HD/MA $4
Edge of Seventeen HD/IT $3
Edward Scissorhands HD/MA $3.5
El Chicano HD/MA $4
Elysium HD/MA $3.5
Emoji Movie HD/MA $3
Empire of Light HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Empire State HD/VU $3
Encanto 4K/GP $3.5
Enough Said HD/MA $3.5
Enter the Dragon 4K/MA $6
Epic HD/MA $3
Equalizer HD/MA $3.5
Equalizer 2 HD/MA $3.5
Escape From Planet Earth HD/VU $3
Eternals HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Everest HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Everything Must Go HD/VU $4
Evil Dead 2 HD/VU $3.5
Ex Machina HD/VU $3
Exodus Gods & Kings HD/MA $3.5
Expired 4K/VU $4.5
Fair Game (Dir) HD/VU $4
Fantastic Four ‘15 HD/MA $4
Fast & Furious 4 4K/MA $5
Fast & the Furious 8-film Set HD/MA $17
Fast & the Furious 9-film Set HD/MA $19
Fast Color 4K/VU $5.5
Fatale ‘20 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Fatherhood HD/MA $4
Fault in Our Stars HD/MA $3.5
Fear of Rain 4K/VU $5.5
Fences HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Ferdinand HD/MA $3.5
Field of Dreams 4K/MA or IT $5.5
Fifty Shades Darker (Unr) HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Fifty Shades Freed HD/MA $4
Fifty Shades of Grey (Unr) 4K/MA or IT $4
Finding Dory HD/GP $2
Finding Nemo HD/GP $3.5
Finest Hours HD/GP $3
Firm 4K/VU $6
First Man HD/MA $4
Flashback ‘20 HD/VU $4
Flight HD/VU or IT $3
Florence Foster Jenkins HD/VU or IT $3
Footloose ‘11 HD/IT $3
Forbidden Kingdom HD/VU $4.5
Ford v Ferrari HD/MA $4
Forest HD/IT $3.5
Forever My Girl HD/IT $3
Fortress HD/VU $3.5
Fortress Sniper's Eye HD/VU $3.5
Fox & the Hound 2 HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Foxcatcher HD/MA $4
Frank & Lola HD/VU or IT $3
Free Guy HD/GP $3
French Dispatch HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Friday the 13th 4K/VU $5.5
From Here to Eternity 4K/MA $5.5
Frozen (Sing-Along) HD/MA $2 or HD/GP $1.5
Frozen HD/GP $2
Frozen 2 HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Frozen Ground ‘13 HD/VU $3.5
Fury HD/MA $3.5
Future World HD/VU $3.5
G.I. Joe Retaliation HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Gambit ‘12 HD/MA $4
Gambler HD/VU or IT $3
Gamer 4K/VU $5.5
Gemini Man 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Get Out 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Ghost in the Shell ‘17 HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Ghost in the Shell ‘95 4K/VU $5
Ghost Team One HD/VU or IT $3.5
Ghostbusters ‘84 HD/MA $3.5
Ghostbusters (Thea & Ext) ‘16 HD/MA $3
Ghostbusters 2 HD/MA $3.5
Gifted HD/MA $3
Girl on Train HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Girl w/ All Gifts HD/VU $4
Giver HD/VU $3.5
Glass Castle 4K/VU $5.5
Glass HD/MA $4
God Bless The Broken Road HD/VU $3.5
God's Not Dead 2 HD/MA or IT $2.5
God's Not Dead 3 HD/MA $3
Gods of Egypt HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Gold ‘16 HD/VU $2.5
Good Dinosaur HD/GP $2.5
Good Kill HD/VU or IT $3.5
Grease 2 HD/VU $3.5
Great Wall 4K/MA or IT $4.5 or HD/MA $3
Greatest Showman HD/MA $3.5
Green Book HD/MA $4
Grey HD/VU or IT $3
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 1 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 HD/GP $2
Guilt Trip HD/VU or IT $3
Gunman HD/MA or IT $3
Guns of Navarone 4K/MA $5.5
Hacksaw Ridge 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Halloween ‘18 HD/MA $3
Hammer of the Gods HD/VU $2
Hannibal S.1 HD/VU $5
Hansel & Gretel Witch Hunters (Unr) HD/VU $3
Hard Luck Love Song 4K/VU $5.5
Hard Target 2 HD/IT $1.5
Hardcore Henry HD/VU or IT $3.5
Hate U Give HD/MA $4
Hateful Eight HD/VU $3.5
Heat (Director's Cut) ‘95 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Heaven is for Real HD/MA $3.5
Hercules ‘14 HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Here Comes the Boom HD/MA $3.5
Hereditary HD/VU $3.5
Hidden Figures HD/MA $3
High Note HD/MA $4
Highlander 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Hitchcock '12 HD/MA $4
Hitman Agent 47 HD/MA $3
Hitman's Bodyguard HD/VU $3.5
Hocus Pocus HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Home HD/MA $3
Home Again HD/MA $3
Home Alone 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Homefront HD/MA or IT $3
Homesman HD/VU $3
Honey 2 HD/VU $3
Hostiles 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Hotel Transylvania 3 HD/MA $3.5
Hot Fuzz HD/VU $4
Hotel Mumbai HD/MA $4
Hours ‘13 HD/VU $4
House of 1000 Corpses HD/VU $4
House of Gucci 4K/IT $5.5
House w/ a Clock in Its Walls sHD/MA $4
How to Train Your Dragon 2 HD/MA $2.5
Hugo HD/VU $3
Hunt for Red October 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Huntsman Winter's War (Ext) HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
I Can Only Imagine HD/VU $3.5
I Feel Pretty HD/IT $2
Ides of March HD/MA $4
I Know What You Did Last Summer 4K/MA $5.5
Imitation Game HD/VU $3
In Secret ‘14 HD/VU $4.5
In the Blood HD/VU $4
Incredibles 2 HD/GP $3
Independence Day ‘96 HD/MA $4
Independence Day Resurgence HD/MA $2.5
Indiana Jones & the Raiders of the Lost Ark 4K/VU or IT $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Indiana Jones & the Temple of Doom 4K/VU or IT $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Indignation HD/VU $4
Indivisible HD/MA $3.5
Inferno HD/MA $3
Initiation 4K/VU $5
Initiation HD/VU $3.5
Internship HD/MA $3
Interstellar 4K/VU or IT $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Interview HD/MA $3.5
Into the Woods HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Invisible Man '20 HD/MA $3.5
Invisible Man ‘33 HD/MA $3.5
Iron Man 3 HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Iron Man & Hulk Heroes United HD/GP $3.5
Iron Mask ‘19 HD/VU $4.5
It Follows HD/VU $3.5
It's a Wonderful Life HD/VU $3
Jack & Jill HD/MA $3.5
Jack Reacher 4K/IT $4.5
Jack Reacher Never Go Back HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Jack Ryan Shadow Recruit 4K/IT $4 or HD/VU $2.5
Jacob's Ladder HD/VU $4
Jane Got a Gun HD/VU $4
Jason Bourne HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Jesus Music HD/VU $3.5
Jexi HD/VU $3.5
Jobs HD/MA or IT $3.5
Joe HD/VU $3.5
Joe Kidd HD/IT $4
John Wick 1 & 2 Bundle HD/VU $4
John Wick 3 Parabellum 4K/VU $4.5
John Wick Chapter 2 HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
John Wick HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
John Wick Trilogy 4K/VU $13 or HD/VU (#3 4K) $9 or all HD/VU $8
Journey to the West Conquering the Demons HD/VU $3.5
Joy HD/MA $3
Judy 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Juliet, Naked 4K/VU $5.5
Jumanji Welcome To The Jungle HD/MA $2.5
Jungle Book ‘16 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
Jungle Cruise HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Jurassic Park 3 HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Jurassic Park 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Jurassic World 5-film Set HD/MA $14
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Kama Sutra HD/VU $4
Kick-Ass 2 HD/MA $3.5
Kid ‘19 HD/VU $3.5
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Kill Zone ‘05 HD/VU $4.5
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King of Staten Island HD/MA $4
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Last Dragon HD/MA $4.5
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Last Witch Hunter 4K/IT $3.5
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Legends of Oz Dorothy's Return HD/MA $3.5
Leprechaun 7-film Set HD/VU $12
Let's be Cops HD/MA $3.5
Let Him Go HD/MA $4
Life ‘17 HD/MA $3.5
Life of Crime HD/VU $3.5
Life of Pi 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA or IT $3.5
Light of My Life HD/IT $3.5
Lightyear HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Like a Boss HD/VU $3.5
Lilo & Stitch 2 HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Lion HD/VU $4
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Little HD/MA $3.5
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MI-5 Spooks '15 HD/VU $4
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Mummy 4-Film Set (Mummy 1-3, Scorpion King) HD/MA $12
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My All American HD/MA or IT $3.5
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Nebraska HD/VU $3
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Office Christmas Party 4K/IT $3.5
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Ouija HD/MA or IT $3.5
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Pacific Rim Uprising HD/MA $4
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Paranormal Activity 3 (Ext) HD/VU or IT $3
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Passengers HD/MA $3.5
Patriot Games 4K/VU $5
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Paul Apostle of Christ HD/MA $3
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Percy Jackson Sea of Monsters HD/MA $3
Perks of Being a Wallflower HD/VU or IT $3 or SD/VU or IT $1
Pet Sematary ‘19 HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Pet Sematary ‘89 HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Peter Rabbit HD/MA $3.5
Pete's Dragon ‘16 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Phantom Thread HD/MA $4
Philomena HD/VU $2.5
Pirates of the Caribbean 5 HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Pitch Perfect 2 4K/MA $4 or HD/MA $2.5
Pitch Perfect HD/MA $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Pixar Short Films Set Vol. 3 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Planes Fire & Rescue HD/GP $3
Planes HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Planes, Trains & Automobiles 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Playing w/ Fire HD/VU or IT $2.5
Poltergeist ‘82 4K/MA $5.5
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Predator ‘18 HD/MA $3
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Promise HD/MA or IT $3.5
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Purge 4K/MA or IT $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or
Push 4K/VU $6
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Queen of Katwe HD/GP $2.5
Quiet Ones HD/VU $3.5
Rambo ‘08 HD/VU $4
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Rambo Last Blood 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Ran ‘85 4K/VU $5.5
Raya & the Last Dragon HD/MA $3.5
Rear Window 4K/IT $3.5
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Redline ‘10 HD/VU $4.5
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Replicant ‘01 HD/VU $3.5
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Rescuers Down Under HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Rescuers HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Reservoir Dogs HD/VU $4
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Retaliation ‘17 HD/VU $4
Revenant 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Ricki & the Flash HD/MA $3
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Right At Your Door HD/VU $4
Right One 4K/VU $5.5
Rio 2 (Sing-Along) HD/MA $3
Riot HD/VU or IT $3
RIPD HD/IT $2.5
Risen HD/MA $3
Rob Zombie Trilogy (3 From Hell, House of 1000 Corpses, Devil's Rejects) HD/VU $8
Robin Hood ‘18 HD/VU $3
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Rocketman ‘19 HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Rocky Horror Picture Show HD/MA $4
Roman J. Israel Esq HD/MA $3
Ron's Gone Wrong HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Room '15 HD/VU $3.5
Rough Night 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Run The Race HD/MA $3
Runner Runner HD/MA $3.5
Rush HD/IT $3
Safe HD/VU or IT $2.5
Same Kind of Different As Me HD/VU or IT $3
Samson HD/MA $3.5
Santa Clause HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Santa Clause 2 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Santa Clause 3 HD/GP $2.5
Sapphires HD/VU $4
Sausage Party HD/MA $3.5
Saving Mr. Banks HD/GP $3
Saw (Unr) 4K/VU $4.5
Saw 7-film Set (Unr) HD/VU $16
Saw HD/VU $3
Scarface HD/MA $4 or 4K/IT $4.5
Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark 4K/VU $4.5
Schindler's List 4K/MA or IT $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Scream '96 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Scream Trilogy HD/VU $11
Secret Garden ‘20 4K/VU or IT $5.5
Secret in Their Eyes HD/VU or IT $3
Secret Life of Pets 4K/MA or IT $4.5 or HD/MA $3
See No Evil 2 HD/VU $3.5
Serenity ‘05 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Seriously Red HD/VU $4
Sex Tape HD/MA $3.5
Shallows HD/MA $3.5
Shang-Chi Legend of the Ten Rings HD/GP $3
Shape of Water HD/MA $3.5
Sherlock Gnomes HD/IT $2.5
Shivers HD/VU $4
Show Dogs HD/MA $3.5
Sicario HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Sicario Day of the Soldado HD/MA $4
Sicario, Wind River, Hell or High Water HD/VU $7.5
Side Effects HD/IT $3.5
Silencing HD/VU $4
Silent Night, Deadly Night 3-Film Set (3-5) HD/VU $7.5
Silk Road 4K/VU $5
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Sing Street HD/VU $4
Sinister HD/VU $3
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Solo A Star Wars Story HD/GP $3
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Z for Zachariah HD/VU $4
Zero Dark Thirty HD/MA $3.5
Zeros & Ones HD/VU $4
Zootopia HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5

Hi! 😅 wala nang pasok wala nako kausap :( looking for friend here na baka same vibes kodin HEHE i have friends naman pero puro girls ung mga friends ko na guy wala na may jowa na ako nlng wala :(( pano ba lumande.. baka bored ka din usap tayo bro! willing to send my pic para comfortable ka kausap ako 😅 di kasi ako nag popost sa facebook at ig share2 lng baka eh stalk moko wala ka dun makikita 😂 we can chat sa messenger ❤️ gusto kolng may buhay messenger ko may nag chachat HAHAHAH
About me: * Bi romantically sa girls both sexually and romantically sa guys * Never been in a relationship * Hate ko mag take pictures hehe nahihiya ako kaya siguro wala laman nf ko nag ma myday din pag feeling pogi ahhaha pero once in a bluemoon lng * Discreet/lowkey * 5’8 sabi ng tape measure sa school hahah * Mas prefer mag stay sa bahay kesa lumabas * Oa pag close na tayo pero nonchalant sa public HAHA * Kanal humor HAHAHHA * Private * Lives in Iloilo
About you: * Medyu oa hahahah * Same height din sana * Discreet * Wag sana englishero HAHAHAHAH dont english2 me * masaya kausap

I'm 23F. Only child. My mom and dad are legally annulled since 12 years old ako. I have a love-hate relationship with my dad kasi 5 years siyang hindi nagparamdam before pero noong nagdadalaga na ako, bumabawi naman siya by giving allowance and stuff. And may new family na siya with several young stepchildren and yung half sister ko na 21 years ang tanda ko. They separated because my dad cheated.
As for my mom, she's my bestfriend or maybe used to be. After their annulment, she had several boyfriends na AFAM pero puro chat lang naman. I literally grow up having a virtual stepdad kuno. Now, after being a government employee for over a decade, nalipat siya sa private company. And she has a long-term virtual AFAM boyfriend (na ayoko before pero eventually natanggap ko na rin naman) and she's cheating on him. Bakit ko alam? Kasi I look on her messenger just to confirm if may bago nga siyang boyfriend. And meron nga pero this time, kasama niya sa work. But at the same time, kausap niya pa rin si AFAM pero hindi na sila nagvividcall.
My parents are both fucking cheaters and I feel disgusted.
Dahil WFH ako, most of the time nasa bahay lang talaga ako. Lumalabas lang din ako to work for my another casual job. I have friends naman pero we rarely hangout kasi they have their own busy lives na rin.
Now, my dilemma is my mom na palaging gabi umuwi. She was never like that. She hates going out. I was supposed to study abroad but I settled here in PH because of my career and because ayokong maiwan siya magisa plus matinding pangagaslight ang ginawa niya para hindi ako tumuloy. And now, I'm the one who was left alone in the middle of the night. Working nonstop.
From before na siya ang nagtetext agad sakin pagpatak ng 7pm at wala pa ako a bahay to now, na ako ang tumatawag kung nasaan na ba siya. Yes, I already communicate to her na baka may pamilya rin yung workmate bf niya dahil sa pagiistalk ko, pinopost pa rin ang family pictures. Alam ko nagsisinungaling siya sakin everytime nirereason niya na nagOOT siya. Lumalayo na ako sa kanya dahil hindi ko na siya kilala and I'm literally raising my own mother... na feeling teenager. And hindi rin pwedeng i-reason out na baka namiss niya lang teen days niya kasi 25 years old siyang kinasal.
I never had a boyfriend kasi I always fell in love with the wrong ones. Good thing, wala namang major trauma na nangyayari sa love life ko pero it seems like hindi ako meant to be for love because of my parents' sins. That I don't deserve to be love because my own bearers treated love as a silly game.
I'm posting this not to seek advice because I know this is something I can't control. But I need a motivation I guess to keep going. Nahihiya ako sa pagkatao ko. Wala ring nakakaalam nitong mga problema ko kasi nahihiya ako sa relatives at friends ko. They will judge my own parents for sure. Maybe that's why takot akong magrisk sa love dahil baka mas lalo akong karmahin. Naniniwala ba kayo na ang anak ang karma ng mga ginawang kasalanan ng magulang?
Right now, I'm trying to heal muna pero if matindi na talaga, I might get a therapist because naghahalo halo na ang stress sa bahay, sa work and other things.

My parents lived with me for almost a year now since si hubby worked in manila (nasa province kami). I was pregnant last year when my husband got a job with 2x salary than his previous, so he accepted the offer. We then decided to move close to my lola’s house (wala na lola ko) where my parents lived with my papa’s 3 brothers. Lasinggero lahat and walang trabaho mga uncles ko, and walang initiative mag linis ng bahay kay super dumi. Also mama ko mas prefer sumama sa mga barkada niya and iniiwan 2 kapatid ko ng walanh pagkain at pera. Kaya sinabi ko sa husband ko since malapit na ako manganak by the time pupunta na siyang manila ipapatira ko nalanh sa bahay parents and 2kapatid ko para may tumolong sa akin, nagpagkasundoan kami lahat sa bills and basta may tumolong lang sakin sa gawainh bahay sana and pag aalis ako papacheck up papabantay ko toddler ko. At first okay naman, kaso nasanay kasi ako na laging malinis bahay namin ni hubby, kay every morning and afternoon nag momop and nag wawalis ako and other things, ako rin nag lilinis ng cr and kadalasan ako nag liligpin ng pagkain ang huhugas ng pinggan. 7 months preggy na ako that time kaya sumasakit na likod ko, and mga kapatid kong lalaki 13 and 15 lage ng nag ccellphone, although pinapabantayan ko sa kanila yong toddler ko dahil baka umakyat ng hagdanan. Katagalan medyo naiinis na ako kasi late matulog lage mga kapatid ko and walang initiative tumolong sa gawaing bahay kahit pag lagay sa washing ng mga damit nila ako pa, pati bedsheets, towel, blankets etc ako lahat. Kaya nong time ihahatid na namin sa hubby sa airport the next day sinabihan ko isang kapatid kong lalaki na mag hugas ng pinggan, kasi umalis kami gabie and don muna natulog sa in law ko since gusto nila sumama paghatid kang hubby sa airport. Maaga kami nagising kasi 5am flight ni hubby and 30mins travel pa, so umuwi ako na pagod at puyad plus dala dala ko pa toddler ko and almost 8months na tummy ko. Pagdating ko ng bahay super kalat, walang hugas yong mga pinggan, and nasa sala yong mama ko natulog (pang gabi work niya) pati kapatid kong lalaki nag lalaro sa phone niya. Kaya sinabihan ko kapatid bat hindi nag hugas ng pinggan eh kahapon pa yon, and tumaas boses ko. Minasama na pala ng mama ko yon.
Days after hindi ako kinikibo nga mama ko, and parang may instinct ako na something kaya tinignan ko messenger niya (alam ko password kasi ako gumawa ng fb niya) and nabasa ko sa chat niya sa kapatid kong babae na baka hindi na raw siya magtagal samin kay sobrang feeling ko na raw porket nakapag asawa ako ng malaki yong sweldo kung maka utos daw ako sa kapatid ko eh parang katulong ko raw pinagtaasan ko pa ng boses. Tatapusin niya lang daw bayaran ang utang niya TV then aalis na daw siya. Sa sobrang galit sinugod ko siya sa kwarto niya at sinabi ko anong problema niya, para sa ganon pagsasalitaan na niya akong na ang feeling ko. Eh mabuti yong intention ko patirahin sila sa bahay para makakain ng maayos mga kapatid ko and para at peace yong buhay nila kasi malinis dito sa bahay plus makaka save sila ng malaki kasi kami lahat ni hubbys nagbabayad sa bills. Pero iniinsist na na sobrang taas na raw paningin ko sa sarili ko, kaya sinabihan ko siya ang ganda ganda nga ng buhay niya simula dito siya tumira dahil wala na siyang ginagawamg gawaing bahay, ni hugas pinggan wala, pag walis wala. Nasa kwarto lang siya lage nag ccellphone buong araw kahit day off natutulog lang or cellphone whole day, ako pa nag luluto ng breakfast, lunch, dinner most of the time. Tas yong mga kapatid ko walang initiative tumolong kahit nakikita nila ako napapagod kay sobrang bigat na ng tummy ko almost 8months na and sakit pa ng likod, minsan mahirap pa matulog sa sobrang sakit ng hips ko. Tas sinagot niya e mas okay nga daw yong life ko ngayon kahit buntis compared sa kanya nuon, sinagot ko siya na kaya gusto niya iparanas sakin na maghirap kasi ayaw na nakikita anak niya na maganda buhay, sinong mama ang ganyan mag isip, and sabi niya bag ko raw binibig deal yong sinabi niya na hindi na siya tatagal sa bahay ko kasi sobrang taas na ng paningin ko sa sariling, sinagot ko siya na kasi magulang ko siya mama ko siya, imbes na supprtahan niya yong anak niya eh parang ayaw niya pa umangat yong buhay. Sobrang dami pa ng piangsasabi niya, hanggang sinabihan niya ako pangit ugali ko katulad ng mga kapatid ni papa, na wala daw ambag mga tita ko sa pag aaral ko at sa pamumuhay nila. Kaya sinagot ko siya mas pangit ugali niya madamot,at lage umaasa sa ibang tao. At baka nakalimotan niya lola ko nagpalaki at nag alaga sakin kahit minsan lang sila nagbibigay pera para sa pag aaral ko lola ko gumawa ng paraan para may pang baom ako, at nong college sa tita ko na kapitid ng papa ko ako umuutang para may bayad sa school, sa kanya rin ako nag papart time (may salon tita ko) kaya kung masama ugali mas masama ugali sa niya.
Di na kami nagkikiboan ng mama ko ng ilang months, pero nakatira pa rin siya dito at ako parin nagbabayad lahat ng bills and groceries, kung meron man siyang ambag yong ay 5-10kilo ng bigas at 1-2kilo lang ng isda.
Kahapon nainis ako kasi may ugali yong kapatid ko e tambak or e lagay kahit saan mga gamit, tinanong ko siya saan niya nilagay belt ng toddler ko kasi aatttend kami ng summer playgroup. Last week ko pa siya tinanong at baka nalimotan lang niya pero kahapon naiinis talaga ako kasi lage lang hindi niya alam sagot niya, nag dabog na ako na bakit kasi hindi nilalagay sa lagayan. Umakyat siya at nag ligpit ng gamit niya don na daw siya sa lola namin (mama ng mama ko) kaya sabi ko sige kung aalis ka wag ka nalang bumalik (may yaya kami yon yong nag aalaga sa 7month ko while may ginagawa ako (I’m a freelancer) ( and sinabi ko na sa parents ko before pa na tulongan nila ako sa toddler ko kasi mas kailangan ako ng bunso).Sumabat yong mama ko at hinalongkat dati naming away, hannggang sinabi niya na kapatid ko na raw nag babantay sa toddler ko, at dapat nga raw sweldohan ko kapatid ko. Kaya sabi ko so ano yong pinaggagastosan ko diyo sa bahay, sa pagkain, sa projects niya, sa shopee niya tas pagpapatulog lang naman talaga yong mahirap kasi ako naman nagpapakain, ligo, bihis sa anak ko. Tas sabi niya kung alam niya daw ganito ugali ko sinakal niya nalang daw ako nong bata pa ako at sana hindi niya daw ako anak, pangit ugali ko bwesit ako at animal (curse word in bisaya). Kay sinabihan ko siya hindi ko rin gusto siya mama ko, and hindi ko rin hiniling siya maging magulang ka ko. At kung tutuosin halos wala siyang naging ambag sa buhay ko kahit responsibilidad naman nila bigyan nga magandang buhay anak nila, at kung hindi sila utang ng utang at di umalis sa dati nilang trabaho eh wala sana sa ganitong sitwasyon. Sinabi ko rin na matagal na naman na ayaw niya sa ugali ko at gusto niyang umalis dito pero 2024 na bat andito pa rin siya, proud pa naman siya sabihin sakin kaya niyang mag rent ng bahay at bat di niya gawin ngayon, may konti pa sana akong respeto sa kanya pero ngayon wala kaya kung bwesit ako mas bwesit siya sabay alis.
As of now andito pa rin siya sa bahay ko. Minsan naiisip ko nagiguilty ako pero ppanindigan ko lahat, di niya rin naman ako ni respeto at nagpasalamat na natilongan ko sila maibsan yong gastos nila. Kaya ako ba yong ggo?

Backstory: I'm classmates with J(20M) and M(19F), I'm much younger than them Pero age doesn't matter when you're making friends, una Kong naging friend si J and first crush ko siya Pero nung nalaman Kona ugali I was a bit disturbed kasi babae ako and he talks down to the girls that he used to ligaw, last year September J confessed to M kaya naging close kami ni M and her other friend K and naging trio kami, on and off yung ligawan nila J at M and I'm always in the middle of it kasi ako yung therapist friend, one time si J blinock Niya si M out of nowhere so kaming trio is we tried to comfort her tapos may nakilala kaming cosplayer na pogi, the guy asked for a meet up and M says yes Pero I was worried about her meeting a stranger kaya nag memessage ako saknya para di siya kabahan, ending wala silang ginawa and nalaman ko nalang na nagpameet up yung guy for s3x syempre nagulat ako, fast forward umamin si M Kay J about doon and they got into a HUGE fight and COMEBACK kasi ako yung messenger nila and it ended up taking a toll on my mental health, now I'm no longer talking to them because I'm already blocked by J kasi sinabi ko Kay M yung disturbing things na sinabi ni J saknya and in a typical not a girl's girl action sinabi niya Kay J about doon, we already have a policy na hindi lalabas yung mga sinasabi namin sa GC kasi controversial Yun and also she was ranting about him na feel Niya hindi nadaw siya mahal ni J (they're in a relationship simula nung January). I've been accused of wanting J when I don't want him (his friend is my boyfriend), I've been called relationship breaker kasi daw sinisira kodaw yung relationship nila with "lies" na sinabi ko knowing nasa GC nilang mga lalaki hung evidence and he already left sa GC nayun and I saw everything (ayaw saknya ng GC because he was a pathological liar). Hindi ko sinabi Kay M about everything kasi marupok siya and she never listens to me and K kaya napagod narin kami.
Now ko lang nalaman na he was stalking me, napansin ko na may sumasabay saakin tuwing umuuwi ako for past few months (I live very far sa school like 2-3 hours na byahe) and may instance na may nakikita akong familiar face Pero I brush it off kasi malayo bahay ko, it's impossible na makikita niya bahay ko kasi he lives near sa school, and kanina lang 7 I was walking towards a tindahan tapos nakita ko yung bike Niya syempre I brushed it off kasi madaming bike saamin Pero nung tumingin ako nakita ko siya syempre nagulat ako, I acted calm and collected Pero deep inside I'm scared, he didn't said anything and he just stared at me from a far hangang umalis siya. I haven't told my bf yet because I don't want to disturb him muna Pero fuck nakakatakot Yun sobra. I feel sick and kanina lang nagtanong si M saakin kung anong problema ko sa bf Niya and I didn't messaged her back. Idk if mapopost Toh, I'm scared.

I'm just asking to see where I've went wrong with the modding list

Mod_Priority,#Mod_Status,#Mod_Name

"0000","+","DLC: TribalPack"
"0001","+","DLC: OldWorldBlues"
"0002","+","DLC: MercenaryPack"
"0003","+","DLC: LonesomeRoad"
"0004","+","DLC: HonestHearts"
"0005","+","DLC: GunRunnersArsenal"
"0006","+","DLC: DeadMoney"
"0007","+","DLC: ClassicPack"
"0008","+","DLC: CaravanPack"
"0009","-","Utilities_separator"
"0010","+","Fixed Esms"
"0011","+","JIP LN NVSE Plugin"
"0012","+","JIP LN Settings INI"
"0013","+","JohnnyGuitar NVSE"
"0014","+","JohnnyGuitar NVSE - INI Presets"
"0015","+","ShowOff xNVSE Plugin"
"0016","+","SUP NVSE Plugin"
"0017","+","NVTF - New Vegas Tick Fix"
"0018","+","NVTF - INI Presets"
"0019","+","kNVSE Animation Plugin"
"0020","+","UIO - User Interface Organizer"
"0021","+","FNV Mod Limit Fix"
"0022","+","Yvile's Crash Logger"
"0023","+","Improved Console (NVSE)"
"0024","+","Console Paste Support"
"0025","+","Basic Console Autocomplete"
"0026","+","KEYWORDS"
"0027","+","Weapon Mesh Improvement Mod"
"0028","-","Bug Fixes_separator"
"0029","+","Yukichigai Unofficial Patch - YUP"
"0030","+","Unofficial Patch NVSE Plus"
"0031","+","Improved AI (Navmesh Overhaul Mod)"
"0032","+","lStewieAl's Tweaks and Engine Fixes"
"0033","+","Stewie Tweaks Essentials INI"
"0034","+","lStewieAl's Engine Optimizations"
"0035","+","Combat Lag Fix (NVSE)"
"0036","+","VATS Lag Fix"
"0037","+","Viewmodel Shake Fix - NVSE"
"0038","+","ISControl Enabler and Ironsights adjuster (now ESPless)"
"0039","+","Iron Sights Aligned"
"0040","+","New Vegas Mesh Improvement Mod - NVMIM"
"0041","+","skinned mesh improvement mod"
"0042","+","PipBoyOn Node Fixes"
"0043","+","Meshes and Collision - Totally Enhanced Nifs (MAC-TEN)"
"0044","+","Items Transformed - Enhanced Meshes (ITEM)"
"0045","+","Improved Lighting Shaders"
"0046","+","Pip-Boy Shading Fix NVSE"
"0047","+","Vanilla Animations Weapon Scale Fix"
"0048","+","Climate Control NVSE"
"0049","+","Misc Audio Tweaks and Fixes"
"0050","+","Misc Audio Tweaks and Fixes (Elijah Missing Distortion fix)"
"0051","+","ActorCause Save Bloat Fix"
"0052","+","MoonlightNVSE"
"0053","+","Aqua Performa - Strip Performance Fix"
"0054","+","Fallout Alpha Rendering Tweaks - NVSE"
"0055","+","External Emittance Fix - NVSE"
"0056","+","Depth of Field Fix - NVSE"
"0057","+","Crafting Consistency Fix (ESP-Less Version)"
"0058","+","ExRB - Extended Roombounds"
"0059","+","Strip Lights Region Fix"
"0060","+","Swimming Creatures Fix - ESPless"
"0061","+","Impostors and LOD Flicker Fix"
"0062","+","yGTM - Gameplay Tweaks and Madness"
"0063","+","Depth of Field Fix"
"0064","+","Collision Meshes"
"0065","+","update Collision Meshes FNV 1.6.3 to 1.6.4"
"0066","+","zlib Updated - NVSE"
"0067","+","Infinite Loading Screen Fix"
"0068","+","OneTweak for FNV"
"0069","-","User Interface_separator"
"0070","+","The Mod Configuration Menu"
"0071","+","High Res Local Maps"
"0072","+","Faster Main Menu (Stewie's Tweaks)"
"0073","+","lStewieAl - Menu Search"
"0074","+","JIP Improved Recipe Menu ESPless"
"0075","+","One HUD - oHUD"
"0076","+","No Exit to Main Menu"
"0077","+","Delay DLC Redux"
"0078","+","MadAce's Ragdoll compatibility patch (b42 grenade throw)"
"0079","+","oHUD-iHUD compat hotfix (b42 grenade throw)"
"0080","+","Cursor Unilaterally Matched (NVSE)"
"0081","+","Smooth HUD - Immersive Transitions (ESPless)"
"0082","+","ySI - Sorting Ycons"
"0083","+","Colorful Inventory Ycons"
"0084","+","yUI - User Ynterface"
"0085","+","Item Cards"
"0086","+","B42 Bows Patch ySI"
"0087","+","ySI - Pick Up Prompts"
"0088","+","ySI - Colorful Icons Support"
"0089","+","Pip-Boy UI Tweaks"
"0090","+","Consistent Weapon Mod Descriptions"
"0091","+","PHW HPAP Visuals (Custom Health and AP Visuals.)"
"0092","+","Consistent Pip-Boy Icons v4"
"0093","+","Consistent Pip-Boy Icons v5 - Apparel"
"0094","+","Consistent Pip-Boy Icons v5 - DLC's Items"
"0095","+","Consistent Pip-Boy Icons v5 - Framework Plugin"
"0096","+","Consistent Pip-Boy Icons v5 - Items"
"0097","+","B42 Descriptions aka Pip-Info"
"0098","+","ySI - Sorting Icons - Autumn Leaves patch"
"0099","+","Titans of the New West Icons"
"0100","+","The Weapon Mod Menu"
"0101","-","Gameplay_separator"
"0102","+","Immersive Recoil 2.0"
"0103","+","Cookable Grenades"
"0104","+","Faster Sleep-Wait"
"0105","+","Auto-Save Manager"
"0106","+","Bad Touch NVSE"
"0107","+","Harder Barter Faster Stronger"
"0108","+","Traps Tweaks - Traps Use Other Skills"
"0109","+","Enhanced Movement"
"0110","+","Enhanced Movement INI"
"0111","+","FOV Slider"
"0112","+","FPS Weapon Lowering"
"0113","+","B42 FireMode - Selective Fire and First Shot Precision - ESPless"
"0114","+","B42 Quickthrow - an alternative grenade hotkey mod"
"0115","+","B42 Melee Bash"
"0116","+","B42 Inspect - aka Animated Ammo and Weapon Condition Checking"
"0117","+","B42 Notify - Corner Messages Overhaul - ESPless"
"0118","+","unDeath - Death Alternative"
"0119","+","Transporters - Fast Travel Alternative"
"0120","+","BallistX - Internal and External Ballistics"
"0121","+","JLM - Just Loot Menu"
"0122","+","Perception-Based Dynamic DoF - ESPless"
"0123","+","Recent Loot Log"
"0124","+","JBT - Just Bullet Time"
"0125","+","JIP Companions Command and Control"
"0126","+","Sneak Vignette - ESPless"
"0127","+","Crafting XP - ESPless"
"0128","+","Immersive Fast Travel Encounters"
"0129","+","Shiloh DS - Clean Pipboy Screen"
"0130","+","Shiloh DS - Color Survival Map & Icons"
"0131","+","Improved Lonesome Road Perks"
"0132","+","Walking Inertia"
"0133","+","ConsistentSpreadv1.3"
"0134","+","Better Charisma"
"0135","+","Charisma alters Companion Limit"
"0136","+","Weapon Requirements System"
"0137","+","Laser Weapon Iron Sights"
"0138","+","Plasma Weapon Iron Sights"
"0139","+","Laser Weapon Iron Sights - Iron Sight Recoil Animations"
"0140","+","Melee VATS Animation Restoration"
"0141","+","NAWEMO - NPCs use Ammo Variants and Weapon Mods"
"0142","+","Modern Ambient Temperature"
"0143","+","Immersive Recoil Ammo Data (Balisticx"
"0144","+","Weapon Pack Patches - ESPless (Balisticx)"
"0145","+","NCR Salute - Espless"
"0146","+","Realistic Equip and Unequip Sounds"
"0147","+","DSOAL - True 3D Sound for Headphones (HRTF mod)"
"0148","+","ATMOS Ambience Overhaul"
"0149","+","B42 Optics Aligned - Another Millenia kNVSE"
"0150","+","Another Millenia and Addon - B42 Optics Patch"
"0151","+","Leave No Witnesses"
"0152","+","B42 Optics Aligned - Vanilla"
"0153","+","NPCs Can Miss"
"0154","+","Real Time Reflections - NVSE"
"0155","+","B42 Optics - Real Time Reflections Patch"
"0156","+","ADS - Backpack - Jump Sound Effects MONO"
"0157","+","Aim Down Sights - Backpack - Jump Impact sound Effects"
"0158","+","Roleplayers Alternative Start Fallout New Vegas"
"0159","+","Radiant Infinium - Endless Questing Framework"
"0160","+","NPCs Sprint kNVSE - ESPless"
"0161","+","Armed to the Teeth - Redux"
"0162","+","Permanent Weapon Shells"
"0163","+","Clockwork Vegas - Calendar Overhaul and Time-based Mechanics"
"0164","+","Limitless Stats"
"0165","+","Martialize"
"0166","+","Manual Reload"
"0167","+","Ricochet - espless"
"0168","+","NPCs use Aid items"
"0169","+","Absolute Damage Threshold"
"0170","+","Windows of the Mojave"
"0171","+","2x Increased Experience"
"0172","+","Realtime Weapon Modding System (b42)"
"0173","+","Retrievable Throwables Reforged"
"0174","+","Immersive Sleeping Encounters"
"0175","+","S.P.E.C.I.A.L. Magazines and Books"
"0176","-","Content_separator"
"0177","+","Functional Post Game Ending"
"0178","+","The Living Desert - Travelers Patrols Consequences Increased Population and more"
"0179","+","Better Brotherhood"
"0180","+","JSawyer Ultimate Edition"
"0181","+","Hidden Valley Overhauled"
"0182","+","Insignia of the Brotherhood"
"0183","+","Mojave NPCs"
"0184","+","JSawyer Ultimate Edition Patches"
"0185","+","JSRS Sound Mod 2.0"
"0186","+","Sound Extender"
"0187","+","Bullet Snap Redux - Espless"
"0188","+","MNTLs Energy Weapons Sound Pack 1_3"
"0189","+","All Explosion Sounds Overhaul BSA and YUP Patch"
"0190","+","NV Novac Apartment"
"0191","+","Sierra Madre Grand Entrance"
"0192","+","B42 Dropmag - Quest Mod Patches"
"0193","+","Mojave Express Courier Delivery Work - Primm"
"0194","+","Deserters Fortress"
"0195","+","DesertersFortress_Update"
"0196","+","Deserters Fortress Update with Demi story add on"
"0197","+","Uncanny Valley Research Center"
"0198","+","Caps and Scraps Pawn"
"0199","+","Checkpoint Gary"
"0200","+","Autumn Leaves"
"0201","+","Of Truth and Lies"
"0202","+","Crossover Content for Death's Last Whisper (of truth and lies)"
"0203","+","The Someguy Series Revamped"
"0204","+","The Someguy Series Revamped (1.2.1 hotfix)"
"0205","+","The Someguy Series"
"0206","+","New Vegas Bounties I"
"0207","+","NVBII TOTNW 2.0 Patch"
"0208","+","The Inheritance"
"0209","+","Russell"
"0210","+","King of the Ring"
"0211","+","New Vegas Bounties II"
"0212","+","New Vegas Bounties II (patch)"
"0213","+","New Vegas Bounties III"
"0214","+","New Vegas Bounties III (.954 patch)"
"0215","+","New Vegas Killer"
"0216","+","The Better Angels"
"0217","+","Death's Last Whisper - Hugs AND Death"
"0218","+","Death's Last Whisper - Angel of Death Update - Texture Fix"
"0219","+","Eve Dialogue for New Vegas Bounties 1 (Original)"
"0220","+","Eve Dialogue for New Vegas Bounties 2"
"0221","-","Visual_separator"
"0222","+","Mostly Fixed FaceGen Tints (NV or TTW)"
"0223","+","Muzzle Flash Light Fix - NVSE"
"0224","+","Viewmodel Shading Fix - NVSE"
"0225","+","Smooth True Iron Sights Camera"
"0226","+","B42 Weapon Inertia"
"0227","+","B42 Optics - ESPless"
"0228","+","High Resolution Water Fog - Water Aliasing Fix"
"0229","+","Improved LOD Noise Texture"
"0230","+","Landscape Texture Improvements"
"0231","+","Wasted Rocks Normals"
"0232","+","More Consistent Vanilla Rock Textures (Less Green Clifftops)"
"0233","+","A Little More Lamplight"
"0234","+","Atmospheric Lighting Tweaks (Interior Lighting for FNV and TTW)"
"0235","+","High Resolution Bloom NVSE"
"0236","+","Cloud Upgrade NVSE"
"0237","+","Interior Rain"
"0238","+","Heat Haze"
"0239","+","3D Rain"
"0240","+","Climate Control - Rain"
"0241","+","Brave New World"
"0242","+","Climate Control - 3D Rain (Patch)"
"0243","+","Helpless Falling"
"0244","+","Sticky Ragdoll Camera"
"0245","+","Afterglow -- Neon illumination"
"0246","+","B42 Loot - Animated Physical Item Pickup - ESPless"
"0247","+","Elegant Sunglare Retexture"
"0248","+","B42 Optics Aligned"
"0249","+","Cloud Shadows"
"0250","+","Hit - B42 Interact Skinning"
"0251","+","B42 Interact - Animated Items and Interactions Framework - ESPless"
"0252","+","B42 Dropmag and One in the chamber"
"0253","+","Lumen - Ambient Lighting"
"0254","+","Hit - B42 Inject Animation Pack - Season 1"
"0255","+","Hit - B42 Inject Anim Pack - Season 1 - JSawyer Ultimate Patch"
"0256","+","Hit - B42 Inject - Water Animations"
"0257","+","Hit - B42 Inject - Sunset Sarsaparilla Animations"
"0258","+","Hit - B42 Inject - Meat Animations"
"0259","+","Hit - B42 Inject - Assorted Items 1"
"0260","+","Hit - B42 Inject - Liquid Courage"
"0261","+","Animated Ingestibles"
"0262","+","Glowing Ghosts - Happy Little Holograms Emit Light"
"0263","+","Radiation Visuals"
"0264","+","Just Bullet Time DoF - ESPless"
"0265","+","Dynamic Depth-Of-Field - ESPless"
"0266","+","ySI - Assorted Fixes"
"0267","+","Drowning Visuals - ESPless"
"0268","+","Animated Sleeping"
"0269","+","Dismemberment Tweaks"
"0270","+","New Vegas - Enhanced Camera"
"0271","+","Melee Hitstop Effects"
"0272","+","Iron Sights Recoil Animations"
"0273","+","Hit's Anims - Season 1"
"0274","+","Hit - Millenia Animations - Part 2"
"0275","+","Hit - B42 Interact Animation Pack"
"0276","+","New Vegas Animation Overhaul Guns"
"0277","+","Bullet Tracers For New vegas"
"0278","+","Subtle Camera Motion"
"0279","+","Frozen Hit Rockomotion"
"0280","+","Real Reticles for B42 Optics"
"0281","+","Combined melee animation pack"
"0282","+","ISInertia"
"0283","+","Hit - Power Armor Pip-Boy Anim"
"0284","+","Pop-Up Message Icons"
"0285","+","Unironically Final 3.0 Even Better Loading Screen and Main Menu Replacer-Butthurt Edition"
"0286","+","Main And Pause Menus Overhaul"
"0287","+","Patch of Desert"
"0288","+","Nights are Darker"
"0289","+","Just Loot Menu DoF - ESPless"
"0290","+","Increased Bullet Impact LOD"
"0291","+","NMCs Textures NV SMALL Pack SINGLE FILE FOR NMM"
"0292","+","Hit - VATS Restored"
"0293","+","B42 Inject - Animated Item Use - ESPless"
"0294","+","Random Stimpak Animation"
"0295","+","Alt's Animation - Remington Rolling Block"
"0296","+","Animated Ingestibles - B42 Inject Patch"
"0297","+","ySI - Various Patches"
"0298","+","New Vegas Animation Overhaul - Guns - Adjusted Reload Sounds"
"0299","-","Perks_separator"
"0300","+","More Perks Reimagined"
"0301","+","Three-perk Bounty"
"0302","+","JSUE Patch (Sweet perk overhaul)"
"0303","+","Sweet Perk Overhaul"
"0304","+","Skill Based Perks"
"0305","+","PerkPackPlus"
"0306","+","Sweet 6 Shooter Perk Pack NV Version"
"0307","+","Swift Learner 10 Ranks"
"0308","+","SnowglobePerks"
"0309","+","Trench Trooper"
"0310","+","Perk Every Level"
"0311","+","Agility Actually Matters - ESPless"
"0312","+","Rapid Regeneration Trait"
"0313","+","Pick Four Traits"
"0314","+","Perkaholic"
"0315","+","4 new Perks"
"0316","+","Choice Based DLC Perk Rewards"
"0317","-","Weapons and armor_separator"
"0318","+","B42 Wristwatch"
"0319","+","B42 Bows"
"0320","+","NCR Trooper Overhaul_beta"
"0321","+","NCR Trooper Overhaul_beta (sapper leg)"
"0322","+","NCR Trooper Overhaul - Distributed"
"0323","+","ARIZONA SLAVE ARMY - A Legion Overhaul"
"0324","+","ARIZONA SLAVE ARMY - A Legion Overhaul (update)f"
"0325","+","Weapon Mods Expanded - WMX"
"0326","+","Armor for Companions"
"0327","+","Classic Fallout inspired Jackals - Armour only"
"0328","+","Kerberos Panzer Police Jin Roh armor (update)"
"0329","+","Kerberos Panzer Police ToTNW Patch"
"0330","+","Kerberos Panzer Police Armor - Thermal Nightvision"
"0331","+","Power armor less DT"
"0332","+","Advanced Recon Stealth Armor"
"0333","+","Adv Recon Stealth Armor - EASIER STEALTH"
"0334","+","Advanced Recon Thermal Nightvision"
"0335","+","Advanced Recon - Main File 1 - TECH"
"0336","+","Advanced Recon - Main File 2 - GEAR"
"0337","+","Glacier Glasses"
"0338","+","Advanced Recon Glacier Glasses"
"0339","+","Caliber Based Damage - espless"
"0340","+","CaliberZL - Modern Ammo Caliber Expansion"
"0341","+","CaliberX"
"0342","+","CaliberX EMS update -"
"0343","+","ZL Armaments Remastered"
"0344","+","Another Millenia"
"0345","+","Custom Scope Overlays for B42 Optics"
"0346","+","Another Millenia Gun Add-on"
"0347","+","Another Millenia Shop Add-on"
"0348","+","AWO Lend-Lease - Springfield 1861"
"0349","+","AWO Lend-Lease - Springfield 1861 (mesh fix Patch)"
"0350","+","AWO - Lend-Lease - MG42"
"0351","+","AWO - Lend-Lease - MG42 (Update)"
"0352","+","MG42 animation for AWO - MG42 by Serviamnon"
"0353","+","AWO - MG42 - B42 Optics Patch"
"0354","+","AWO Lend-Lease - Winchester 1895 (Trench Repeater)"
"0355","+","AWO Lend-Lease - Winchester 1895 (Trench Repeater) (b42 patch)"
"0356","+","AWO - Trench Repeater - NVTS patch"
"0357","+","AWO Lend-Lease - Lee-Enfield - B42 Optics Patch"
"0358","+","AWO Lend-Lease - Lee-Enfield"
"0359","+","Canvas Backpacks - FNV - TTW"
"0360","+","CIBS - Customizable Integrated Backpack System"
"0361","+","454 Casull Auto"
"0362","+","The Jackal"
"0363","+","The Jackal - Hellsing ARMS 13mm Auto Anti-Freak Combat Pistol kNVSE set"
"0364","+","Ani_Desert Eagle kNVSE Set"
"0365","+","Collectible Canteens"
"0366","+","Collectible Canteens (Patch)"
"0367","+","PipBoyToPSVITA"
"0368","+","Quantum Trigger"
"0369","+","Functional Benny's Lighter"
"0370","+","Hunting Revolver Iron Sights"
"0371","+","Anti-Materiel Rifle Iron Sights"
"0372","+","Mojave Express Messenger Bag"
"0373","+","Knights of the Mojave (Brotherhood Knights expanded)"
"0374","+","NCR Chemtroopers (Sodaz Trench Raiders inspired)"
"0375","+","Titans of The New West"
"0376","+","NIGHTMARE FIENDS - A Junkie Overhaul"
"0377","+","NIGHTMARE FIENDS - A Junkie Overhaul (Update for sadist armor)"
"0378","+","Merc Armor Buffed - ESPless"
"0379","+","Postman_uniform"
"0380","+","AK-50"
"0381","+","AK50 - B42 Optics Patch"
"0382","+","AK50 - Update 1.1"
"0383","+","El Sepulturero - The Cursed Shovel"
"0384","+","Fat Stacks"
"0385","+","Raygun"
"0386","+","Lil' Bomber"
"0387","+","Defibrillator"
"0388","+","Nintendo Zapper Pistol"
"0389","+","NES ZAPPER (clintmich) hitman animations patch"
"0390","+","Combine Stun Batton"
"0391","+","Ammo Boxes - An Economy Fix"
"0392","+","More Powerful Service Rifle"
"0393","+","Remington Rolling Block Rifle"
"0394","+","FG 42 I"
"0395","+","FG 42 I - Patch 1.1"
"0396","+","B42 Optics - Remington Rolling Block Rifle Patch"
"0397","+","M1903A3 Springfield Redux"
"0398","-","Stuff that Belongs to the VERY bottom_separator"
"0399","+","Vanilla HUD Remastered"
"0400","+","Skeleton by MadAce (Ragdoll mod compat)"
"0401","+","Diagonal movement"
"0402","+","Ragdolls"
"0403","+","360 Movement"
"0404","+","NV Compatibility Skeleton (B42 bow compatiblility patch)"
"0405","+","NV Compatibility Skeleton"
"0406","+","Desert Natural Weathers - NV - TTW"
"0407","+","Desert Natural Realism - Redux"
"0408","+","Vanilla UI Plus (New Vegas)"

I'm just asking for a few tips to see where I've done wrong with the mods I've downloaded.

Mod_Priority,#Mod_Status,#Mod_Name

"0000","+","DLC: TribalPack"
"0001","+","DLC: OldWorldBlues"
"0002","+","DLC: MercenaryPack"
"0003","+","DLC: LonesomeRoad"
"0004","+","DLC: HonestHearts"
"0005","+","DLC: GunRunnersArsenal"
"0006","+","DLC: DeadMoney"
"0007","+","DLC: ClassicPack"
"0008","+","DLC: CaravanPack"
"0009","-","Utilities_separator"
"0010","+","Fixed Esms"
"0011","+","JIP LN NVSE Plugin"
"0012","+","JIP LN Settings INI"
"0013","+","JohnnyGuitar NVSE"
"0014","+","JohnnyGuitar NVSE - INI Presets"
"0015","+","ShowOff xNVSE Plugin"
"0016","+","SUP NVSE Plugin"
"0017","+","NVTF - New Vegas Tick Fix"
"0018","+","NVTF - INI Presets"
"0019","+","kNVSE Animation Plugin"
"0020","+","UIO - User Interface Organizer"
"0021","+","FNV Mod Limit Fix"
"0022","+","Yvile's Crash Logger"
"0023","+","Improved Console (NVSE)"
"0024","+","Console Paste Support"
"0025","+","Basic Console Autocomplete"
"0026","+","KEYWORDS"
"0027","+","Weapon Mesh Improvement Mod"
"0028","-","Bug Fixes_separator"
"0029","+","Yukichigai Unofficial Patch - YUP"
"0030","+","Unofficial Patch NVSE Plus"
"0031","+","Improved AI (Navmesh Overhaul Mod)"
"0032","+","lStewieAl's Tweaks and Engine Fixes"
"0033","+","Stewie Tweaks Essentials INI"
"0034","+","lStewieAl's Engine Optimizations"
"0035","+","Combat Lag Fix (NVSE)"
"0036","+","VATS Lag Fix"
"0037","+","Viewmodel Shake Fix - NVSE"
"0038","+","ISControl Enabler and Ironsights adjuster (now ESPless)"
"0039","+","Iron Sights Aligned"
"0040","+","New Vegas Mesh Improvement Mod - NVMIM"
"0041","+","skinned mesh improvement mod"
"0042","+","PipBoyOn Node Fixes"
"0043","+","Meshes and Collision - Totally Enhanced Nifs (MAC-TEN)"
"0044","+","Items Transformed - Enhanced Meshes (ITEM)"
"0045","+","Improved Lighting Shaders"
"0046","+","Pip-Boy Shading Fix NVSE"
"0047","+","Vanilla Animations Weapon Scale Fix"
"0048","+","Climate Control NVSE"
"0049","+","Misc Audio Tweaks and Fixes"
"0050","+","Misc Audio Tweaks and Fixes (Elijah Missing Distortion fix)"
"0051","+","ActorCause Save Bloat Fix"
"0052","+","MoonlightNVSE"
"0053","+","Aqua Performa - Strip Performance Fix"
"0054","+","Fallout Alpha Rendering Tweaks - NVSE"
"0055","+","External Emittance Fix - NVSE"
"0056","+","Depth of Field Fix - NVSE"
"0057","+","Crafting Consistency Fix (ESP-Less Version)"
"0058","+","ExRB - Extended Roombounds"
"0059","+","Strip Lights Region Fix"
"0060","+","Swimming Creatures Fix - ESPless"
"0061","+","Impostors and LOD Flicker Fix"
"0062","+","yGTM - Gameplay Tweaks and Madness"
"0063","+","Depth of Field Fix"
"0064","+","Collision Meshes"
"0065","+","update Collision Meshes FNV 1.6.3 to 1.6.4"
"0066","+","zlib Updated - NVSE"
"0067","+","Infinite Loading Screen Fix"
"0068","+","OneTweak for FNV"
"0069","-","User Interface_separator"
"0070","+","The Mod Configuration Menu"
"0071","+","High Res Local Maps"
"0072","+","Faster Main Menu (Stewie's Tweaks)"
"0073","+","lStewieAl - Menu Search"
"0074","+","JIP Improved Recipe Menu ESPless"
"0075","+","One HUD - oHUD"
"0076","+","No Exit to Main Menu"
"0077","+","Delay DLC Redux"
"0078","+","MadAce's Ragdoll compatibility patch (b42 grenade throw)"
"0079","+","oHUD-iHUD compat hotfix (b42 grenade throw)"
"0080","+","Cursor Unilaterally Matched (NVSE)"
"0081","+","Smooth HUD - Immersive Transitions (ESPless)"
"0082","+","ySI - Sorting Ycons"
"0083","+","Colorful Inventory Ycons"
"0084","+","yUI - User Ynterface"
"0085","+","Item Cards"
"0086","+","B42 Bows Patch ySI"
"0087","+","ySI - Pick Up Prompts"
"0088","+","ySI - Colorful Icons Support"
"0089","+","Pip-Boy UI Tweaks"
"0090","+","Consistent Weapon Mod Descriptions"
"0091","+","PHW HPAP Visuals (Custom Health and AP Visuals.)"
"0092","+","Consistent Pip-Boy Icons v4"
"0093","+","Consistent Pip-Boy Icons v5 - Apparel"
"0094","+","Consistent Pip-Boy Icons v5 - DLC's Items"
"0095","+","Consistent Pip-Boy Icons v5 - Framework Plugin"
"0096","+","Consistent Pip-Boy Icons v5 - Items"
"0097","+","B42 Descriptions aka Pip-Info"
"0098","+","ySI - Sorting Icons - Autumn Leaves patch"
"0099","+","Titans of the New West Icons"
"0100","+","The Weapon Mod Menu"
"0101","-","Gameplay_separator"
"0102","+","Immersive Recoil 2.0"
"0103","+","Cookable Grenades"
"0104","+","Faster Sleep-Wait"
"0105","+","Auto-Save Manager"
"0106","+","Bad Touch NVSE"
"0107","+","Harder Barter Faster Stronger"
"0108","+","Traps Tweaks - Traps Use Other Skills"
"0109","+","Enhanced Movement"
"0110","+","Enhanced Movement INI"
"0111","+","FOV Slider"
"0112","+","FPS Weapon Lowering"
"0113","+","B42 FireMode - Selective Fire and First Shot Precision - ESPless"
"0114","+","B42 Quickthrow - an alternative grenade hotkey mod"
"0115","+","B42 Melee Bash"
"0116","+","B42 Inspect - aka Animated Ammo and Weapon Condition Checking"
"0117","+","B42 Notify - Corner Messages Overhaul - ESPless"
"0118","+","unDeath - Death Alternative"
"0119","+","Transporters - Fast Travel Alternative"
"0120","+","BallistX - Internal and External Ballistics"
"0121","+","JLM - Just Loot Menu"
"0122","+","Perception-Based Dynamic DoF - ESPless"
"0123","+","Recent Loot Log"
"0124","+","JBT - Just Bullet Time"
"0125","+","JIP Companions Command and Control"
"0126","+","Sneak Vignette - ESPless"
"0127","+","Crafting XP - ESPless"
"0128","+","Immersive Fast Travel Encounters"
"0129","+","Shiloh DS - Clean Pipboy Screen"
"0130","+","Shiloh DS - Color Survival Map & Icons"
"0131","+","Improved Lonesome Road Perks"
"0132","+","Walking Inertia"
"0133","+","ConsistentSpreadv1.3"
"0134","+","Better Charisma"
"0135","+","Charisma alters Companion Limit"
"0136","+","Weapon Requirements System"
"0137","+","Laser Weapon Iron Sights"
"0138","+","Plasma Weapon Iron Sights"
"0139","+","Laser Weapon Iron Sights - Iron Sight Recoil Animations"
"0140","+","Melee VATS Animation Restoration"
"0141","+","NAWEMO - NPCs use Ammo Variants and Weapon Mods"
"0142","+","Modern Ambient Temperature"
"0143","+","Immersive Recoil Ammo Data (Balisticx"
"0144","+","Weapon Pack Patches - ESPless (Balisticx)"
"0145","+","NCR Salute - Espless"
"0146","+","Realistic Equip and Unequip Sounds"
"0147","+","DSOAL - True 3D Sound for Headphones (HRTF mod)"
"0148","+","ATMOS Ambience Overhaul"
"0149","+","B42 Optics Aligned - Another Millenia kNVSE"
"0150","+","Another Millenia and Addon - B42 Optics Patch"
"0151","+","Leave No Witnesses"
"0152","+","B42 Optics Aligned - Vanilla"
"0153","+","NPCs Can Miss"
"0154","+","Real Time Reflections - NVSE"
"0155","+","B42 Optics - Real Time Reflections Patch"
"0156","+","ADS - Backpack - Jump Sound Effects MONO"
"0157","+","Aim Down Sights - Backpack - Jump Impact sound Effects"
"0158","+","Roleplayers Alternative Start Fallout New Vegas"
"0159","+","Radiant Infinium - Endless Questing Framework"
"0160","+","NPCs Sprint kNVSE - ESPless"
"0161","+","Armed to the Teeth - Redux"
"0162","+","Permanent Weapon Shells"
"0163","+","Clockwork Vegas - Calendar Overhaul and Time-based Mechanics"
"0164","+","Limitless Stats"
"0165","+","Martialize"
"0166","+","Manual Reload"
"0167","+","Ricochet - espless"
"0168","+","NPCs use Aid items"
"0169","+","Absolute Damage Threshold"
"0170","+","Windows of the Mojave"
"0171","+","2x Increased Experience"
"0172","+","Realtime Weapon Modding System (b42)"
"0173","+","Retrievable Throwables Reforged"
"0174","+","Immersive Sleeping Encounters"
"0175","+","S.P.E.C.I.A.L. Magazines and Books"
"0176","-","Content_separator"
"0177","+","Functional Post Game Ending"
"0178","+","The Living Desert - Travelers Patrols Consequences Increased Population and more"
"0179","+","Better Brotherhood"
"0180","+","JSawyer Ultimate Edition"
"0181","+","Hidden Valley Overhauled"
"0182","+","Insignia of the Brotherhood"
"0183","+","Mojave NPCs"
"0184","+","JSawyer Ultimate Edition Patches"
"0185","+","JSRS Sound Mod 2.0"
"0186","+","Sound Extender"
"0187","+","Bullet Snap Redux - Espless"
"0188","+","MNTLs Energy Weapons Sound Pack 1_3"
"0189","+","All Explosion Sounds Overhaul BSA and YUP Patch"
"0190","+","NV Novac Apartment"
"0191","+","Sierra Madre Grand Entrance"
"0192","+","B42 Dropmag - Quest Mod Patches"
"0193","+","Mojave Express Courier Delivery Work - Primm"
"0194","+","Deserters Fortress"
"0195","+","DesertersFortress_Update"
"0196","+","Deserters Fortress Update with Demi story add on"
"0197","+","Uncanny Valley Research Center"
"0198","+","Caps and Scraps Pawn"
"0199","+","Checkpoint Gary"
"0200","+","Autumn Leaves"
"0201","+","Of Truth and Lies"
"0202","+","Crossover Content for Death's Last Whisper (of truth and lies)"
"0203","+","The Someguy Series Revamped"
"0204","+","The Someguy Series Revamped (1.2.1 hotfix)"
"0205","+","The Someguy Series"
"0206","+","New Vegas Bounties I"
"0207","+","NVBII TOTNW 2.0 Patch"
"0208","+","The Inheritance"
"0209","+","Russell"
"0210","+","King of the Ring"
"0211","+","New Vegas Bounties II"
"0212","+","New Vegas Bounties II (patch)"
"0213","+","New Vegas Bounties III"
"0214","+","New Vegas Bounties III (.954 patch)"
"0215","+","New Vegas Killer"
"0216","+","The Better Angels"
"0217","+","Death's Last Whisper - Hugs AND Death"
"0218","+","Death's Last Whisper - Angel of Death Update - Texture Fix"
"0219","+","Eve Dialogue for New Vegas Bounties 1 (Original)"
"0220","+","Eve Dialogue for New Vegas Bounties 2"
"0221","-","Visual_separator"
"0222","+","Mostly Fixed FaceGen Tints (NV or TTW)"
"0223","+","Muzzle Flash Light Fix - NVSE"
"0224","+","Viewmodel Shading Fix - NVSE"
"0225","+","Smooth True Iron Sights Camera"
"0226","+","B42 Weapon Inertia"
"0227","+","B42 Optics - ESPless"
"0228","+","High Resolution Water Fog - Water Aliasing Fix"
"0229","+","Improved LOD Noise Texture"
"0230","+","Landscape Texture Improvements"
"0231","+","Wasted Rocks Normals"
"0232","+","More Consistent Vanilla Rock Textures (Less Green Clifftops)"
"0233","+","A Little More Lamplight"
"0234","+","Atmospheric Lighting Tweaks (Interior Lighting for FNV and TTW)"
"0235","+","High Resolution Bloom NVSE"
"0236","+","Cloud Upgrade NVSE"
"0237","+","Interior Rain"
"0238","+","Heat Haze"
"0239","+","3D Rain"
"0240","+","Climate Control - Rain"
"0241","+","Brave New World"
"0242","+","Climate Control - 3D Rain (Patch)"
"0243","+","Helpless Falling"
"0244","+","Sticky Ragdoll Camera"
"0245","+","Afterglow -- Neon illumination"
"0246","+","B42 Loot - Animated Physical Item Pickup - ESPless"
"0247","+","Elegant Sunglare Retexture"
"0248","+","B42 Optics Aligned"
"0249","+","Cloud Shadows"
"0250","+","Hit - B42 Interact Skinning"
"0251","+","B42 Interact - Animated Items and Interactions Framework - ESPless"
"0252","+","B42 Dropmag and One in the chamber"
"0253","+","Lumen - Ambient Lighting"
"0254","+","Hit - B42 Inject Animation Pack - Season 1"
"0255","+","Hit - B42 Inject Anim Pack - Season 1 - JSawyer Ultimate Patch"
"0256","+","Hit - B42 Inject - Water Animations"
"0257","+","Hit - B42 Inject - Sunset Sarsaparilla Animations"
"0258","+","Hit - B42 Inject - Meat Animations"
"0259","+","Hit - B42 Inject - Assorted Items 1"
"0260","+","Hit - B42 Inject - Liquid Courage"
"0261","+","Animated Ingestibles"
"0262","+","Glowing Ghosts - Happy Little Holograms Emit Light"
"0263","+","Radiation Visuals"
"0264","+","Just Bullet Time DoF - ESPless"
"0265","+","Dynamic Depth-Of-Field - ESPless"
"0266","+","ySI - Assorted Fixes"
"0267","+","Drowning Visuals - ESPless"
"0268","+","Animated Sleeping"
"0269","+","Dismemberment Tweaks"
"0270","+","New Vegas - Enhanced Camera"
"0271","+","Melee Hitstop Effects"
"0272","+","Iron Sights Recoil Animations"
"0273","+","Hit's Anims - Season 1"
"0274","+","Hit - Millenia Animations - Part 2"
"0275","+","Hit - B42 Interact Animation Pack"
"0276","+","New Vegas Animation Overhaul Guns"
"0277","+","Bullet Tracers For New vegas"
"0278","+","Subtle Camera Motion"
"0279","+","Frozen Hit Rockomotion"
"0280","+","Real Reticles for B42 Optics"
"0281","+","Combined melee animation pack"
"0282","+","ISInertia"
"0283","+","Hit - Power Armor Pip-Boy Anim"
"0284","+","Pop-Up Message Icons"
"0285","+","Unironically Final 3.0 Even Better Loading Screen and Main Menu Replacer-Butthurt Edition"
"0286","+","Main And Pause Menus Overhaul"
"0287","+","Patch of Desert"
"0288","+","Nights are Darker"
"0289","+","Just Loot Menu DoF - ESPless"
"0290","+","Increased Bullet Impact LOD"
"0291","+","NMCs Textures NV SMALL Pack SINGLE FILE FOR NMM"
"0292","+","Hit - VATS Restored"
"0293","+","B42 Inject - Animated Item Use - ESPless"
"0294","+","Random Stimpak Animation"
"0295","+","Alt's Animation - Remington Rolling Block"
"0296","+","Animated Ingestibles - B42 Inject Patch"
"0297","+","ySI - Various Patches"
"0298","+","New Vegas Animation Overhaul - Guns - Adjusted Reload Sounds"
"0299","-","Perks_separator"
"0300","+","More Perks Reimagined"
"0301","+","Three-perk Bounty"
"0302","+","JSUE Patch (Sweet perk overhaul)"
"0303","+","Sweet Perk Overhaul"
"0304","+","Skill Based Perks"
"0305","+","PerkPackPlus"
"0306","+","Sweet 6 Shooter Perk Pack NV Version"
"0307","+","Swift Learner 10 Ranks"
"0308","+","SnowglobePerks"
"0309","+","Trench Trooper"
"0310","+","Perk Every Level"
"0311","+","Agility Actually Matters - ESPless"
"0312","+","Rapid Regeneration Trait"
"0313","+","Pick Four Traits"
"0314","+","Perkaholic"
"0315","+","4 new Perks"
"0316","+","Choice Based DLC Perk Rewards"
"0317","-","Weapons and armor_separator"
"0318","+","B42 Wristwatch"
"0319","+","B42 Bows"
"0320","+","NCR Trooper Overhaul_beta"
"0321","+","NCR Trooper Overhaul_beta (sapper leg)"
"0322","+","NCR Trooper Overhaul - Distributed"
"0323","+","ARIZONA SLAVE ARMY - A Legion Overhaul"
"0324","+","ARIZONA SLAVE ARMY - A Legion Overhaul (update)f"
"0325","+","Weapon Mods Expanded - WMX"
"0326","+","Armor for Companions"
"0327","+","Classic Fallout inspired Jackals - Armour only"
"0328","+","Kerberos Panzer Police Jin Roh armor (update)"
"0329","+","Kerberos Panzer Police ToTNW Patch"
"0330","+","Kerberos Panzer Police Armor - Thermal Nightvision"
"0331","+","Power armor less DT"
"0332","+","Advanced Recon Stealth Armor"
"0333","+","Adv Recon Stealth Armor - EASIER STEALTH"
"0334","+","Advanced Recon Thermal Nightvision"
"0335","+","Advanced Recon - Main File 1 - TECH"
"0336","+","Advanced Recon - Main File 2 - GEAR"
"0337","+","Glacier Glasses"
"0338","+","Advanced Recon Glacier Glasses"
"0339","+","Caliber Based Damage - espless"
"0340","+","CaliberZL - Modern Ammo Caliber Expansion"
"0341","+","CaliberX"
"0342","+","CaliberX EMS update -"
"0343","+","ZL Armaments Remastered"
"0344","+","Another Millenia"
"0345","+","Custom Scope Overlays for B42 Optics"
"0346","+","Another Millenia Gun Add-on"
"0347","+","Another Millenia Shop Add-on"
"0348","+","AWO Lend-Lease - Springfield 1861"
"0349","+","AWO Lend-Lease - Springfield 1861 (mesh fix Patch)"
"0350","+","AWO - Lend-Lease - MG42"
"0351","+","AWO - Lend-Lease - MG42 (Update)"
"0352","+","MG42 animation for AWO - MG42 by Serviamnon"
"0353","+","AWO - MG42 - B42 Optics Patch"
"0354","+","AWO Lend-Lease - Winchester 1895 (Trench Repeater)"
"0355","+","AWO Lend-Lease - Winchester 1895 (Trench Repeater) (b42 patch)"
"0356","+","AWO - Trench Repeater - NVTS patch"
"0357","+","AWO Lend-Lease - Lee-Enfield - B42 Optics Patch"
"0358","+","AWO Lend-Lease - Lee-Enfield"
"0359","+","Canvas Backpacks - FNV - TTW"
"0360","+","CIBS - Customizable Integrated Backpack System"
"0361","+","454 Casull Auto"
"0362","+","The Jackal"
"0363","+","The Jackal - Hellsing ARMS 13mm Auto Anti-Freak Combat Pistol kNVSE set"
"0364","+","Ani_Desert Eagle kNVSE Set"
"0365","+","Collectible Canteens"
"0366","+","Collectible Canteens (Patch)"
"0367","+","PipBoyToPSVITA"
"0368","+","Quantum Trigger"
"0369","+","Functional Benny's Lighter"
"0370","+","Hunting Revolver Iron Sights"
"0371","+","Anti-Materiel Rifle Iron Sights"
"0372","+","Mojave Express Messenger Bag"
"0373","+","Knights of the Mojave (Brotherhood Knights expanded)"
"0374","+","NCR Chemtroopers (Sodaz Trench Raiders inspired)"
"0375","+","Titans of The New West"
"0376","+","NIGHTMARE FIENDS - A Junkie Overhaul"
"0377","+","NIGHTMARE FIENDS - A Junkie Overhaul (Update for sadist armor)"
"0378","+","Merc Armor Buffed - ESPless"
"0379","+","Postman_uniform"
"0380","+","AK-50"
"0381","+","AK50 - B42 Optics Patch"
"0382","+","AK50 - Update 1.1"
"0383","+","El Sepulturero - The Cursed Shovel"
"0384","+","Fat Stacks"
"0385","+","Raygun"
"0386","+","Lil' Bomber"
"0387","+","Defibrillator"
"0388","+","Nintendo Zapper Pistol"
"0389","+","NES ZAPPER (clintmich) hitman animations patch"
"0390","+","Combine Stun Batton"
"0391","+","Ammo Boxes - An Economy Fix"
"0392","+","More Powerful Service Rifle"
"0393","+","Remington Rolling Block Rifle"
"0394","+","FG 42 I"
"0395","+","FG 42 I - Patch 1.1"
"0396","+","B42 Optics - Remington Rolling Block Rifle Patch"
"0397","+","M1903A3 Springfield Redux"
"0398","-","Stuff that Belongs to the VERY bottom_separator"
"0399","+","Vanilla HUD Remastered"
"0400","+","Skeleton by MadAce (Ragdoll mod compat)"
"0401","+","Diagonal movement"
"0402","+","Ragdolls"
"0403","+","360 Movement"
"0404","+","NV Compatibility Skeleton (B42 bow compatiblility patch)"
"0405","+","NV Compatibility Skeleton"
"0406","+","Desert Natural Weathers - NV - TTW"
"0407","+","Desert Natural Realism - Redux"
"0408","+","Vanilla UI Plus (New Vegas)"

Session 0: https://www.reddit.com/DeltaGreenRPG/comments/1d0l92x/impossible_landscapes_session_0/
(Okay, these will be long. Five players, lmao. Hadn't quite accounted for that)
Operation ALICE, New York, 1995
The Roster (Player/Character)
Lea (she/her): Jules Gradkowska - Agent MIRANDA. Journalist - research and human intelligence.
Iain (he/him): Ralph Bevis - Agent MILHOUSE. Academic - history and occult specialist.
Quinn (he/him): Richard Delapore - Agent MAVERICK. FBI Special Agent - criminal and forensic expert and the official 'face' of the investigation.
Phil (he/him): Jean Duvall - Agent MAIN. US Navy Master Chief Petty Officer - operational security specialist.
Duncan (he/him): Jake Little - Agent MALATESTA. Civilian contractor - computer and electronic specialist with a side line in hacking.
Rob_sothoth (he/him) - Handler. The arbiter of the world: the good, the bad and that which cannot and should not be named.
Background: The Agents of M-Cell are tasked with investigating the apartment of Abigail Wright. Missing since June, Delta Green has reason to suspect para-natural involvement. Their orders are simple: catalogue the apartment and remove anything deemed suspect for destruction.
Despite heavy changes made, full spoiler warning for Impossible Landscapes.

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Session 1 "The Apartment" (May 24th, 2024)
New York: Tuesday, August 8th, 1995
1:45pm - 3:32pm, EST
Entering the lobby of the Macallistar building in Kips Bay, NYC, the Agents first make a sweep of Abigail's mailbox. Agent MARCUS (M-Cell Case Officer) provided them with a complete set of keys, not to be copied. The mailbox is stuffed full with bills, junk mail, catalogues and offers; mail still being delivered by people who have no idea Abigail is missing. MAVERICK gathers it in a bag and they make their way to Abigail's apartment (Ground floor).
The Macallistar echoes an earlier age. Faded purple carpeting and design from the turn of the century. Opposite Abigail's front door is an old-fashioned telephone nook, complete with bench and curtain for comfort and privacy when phone-lines in individual apartment was an expense few could afford.
M-Cell enters the apartment, finding it somewhere between a hoarder's dream and crime-scene technician's nightmare. The small hallway leads to a living-room (the apartment's largest space), an adjoining bedroom and a kitchen and bathroom opposite each other. Aside from the hallway, on first inspection the only other uncluttered space is the kitchen, which doesn't really look as if it's been used much. MAVERICK ear-marks that as something he wants to check himself as the team begin taking stock.
The NYPD has left a box with copies of their files, including a list of tenants they interviewed, many, many evidence collection bags and a box of latex gloves.
The apartment is filled with various items, with almost no floor visible beneath the collection. CDs and CD cases are stuck or glued to the wall, along with mannequin parts, sketches and assorted pieces that might be ceramic or plastic arranged in odd patterns without reason or rhyme. Stacks of phone books, stretches of dyed fabrics stitched together, an antique claw-footed lamp. Bags, bundles of pictures (drawings and photographs) of seeming nonsense. No furniture is immediately visible in the chaotic mess.
MAIN finds the same result in the bedroom as the first Search rolls are called for. Something catches his eye in the anarchy of the bedroom.
MALATESTA begins sorting through the pile of mail. MILHOUSE at first begins helping, but seeing the scale of the cataloguing, volunteers to make a coffee and food run. MIRANDA begins photographing, while MAVERICK gloves up and asks for things to be passed to him such as brushes, anything with a handle really or something more likely to have fingerprints on it. He wants to see if he can grab a set of Abigail's prints, if that's possible.
It doesn't take MALATESTA long to work out Abigail stopped paying her rent and bills in or around March before disappearing in June. Money was coming in up to a certain point, apparently from a showing Abigail had at the Mercury Gallery in Greenwich Village in November the previous year. There's even a letter from the gallery owner asking about another possible showing; from the way it's written, it might not have been the first time he spoke to Abigail before she vanished. Then, the only money coming in appears to be from her father, though she doesn't appear to have used it to cover the rent. He also gets the building management company, Art Life and their address.
As the Agents work, with MAIN carefully picking his way through the bedroom towards whatever caught his eye and MAVERICK uncovers a battery-powered hi-fi under all the trash, MILHOUSE returns from his coffee run and bumps into someone else entering the Macallistar at the same time he is. After an awkward hesitation on the threshold, MILHOUSE spends a little chatting to Lewis Post, one of Abigail's neighbours. MILHOUSE passes a HUMINT roll and I ruled that having spent most of his time in academics and his fellow PhDs, he can spot signs of some kind of social anxiety. I felt that was a fair get for a good success.
Lewis is hesitant but forthcoming as MILHOUSE works that high charisma score, knowing what to say to diffuse any potential tension. As far as Lewis knows, he is FBI of some kind after all.
MILHOUSE: "Did she ever mention a boyfriend? Girlfriend?"
Lewis: "Our relationship wasn't really like that. We had coffee sometimes. Talked about art. The process." He thinks. "She might have mentioned someone, but not a name, only what they did. A salesman, but I couldn't tell you what they sold."
MILHOUSE: "Talk about anything else?"
Lewis begins heading upstairs "She mentioned moving, but not before she was ready."
Back in the apartment, MAIN voices what others were thinking. "Where was she staying?" No bed, no signs of habitation except for the assorted hoard of crap. MAIN finds a hand grenade nestled in some papers and art supplies near the bedroom's walk-in closet.
In the living room, MAVERICK finds a single cassette tape in the uncovered hi-fi and flips it on, finding the batteries still live. Everyone hears MAVERICK's conversation with his significant other, Natalie from the previous evening. MAVERICK realises it's cut up and out of order, rewinds it and then flips it over. He thinks the entire conversation has been split between A & B sides of the tape.
MALATESTA and MAVERICK both consider phone-tapping, but MAIN, grenade temporarily forgotten, asks how it ended up here?
SAN check for MAVERICK. Pocketing the cassette tape, MAVERICK closes down a bit and prepares to go over the kitchen with a fine tooth comb; perhaps this is how he copes?
Before MAIN can mention the grenade he's worried about, MIRANDA, MALATESTA, MILHOUSE & MAVERICK notice something on the wall behind where the hi-fi was previously buried under junk. Fixed to the wall, maybe with some kind of glue is a piece of brown packing-paper with some kind of symbol drawn on it. Everyone focuses on it.

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3:41pm to 5:22pm, EST
MALATESTA: "That certainly looks like what we're supposed to be worried about."
MIRANDA snaps a polaroid. MILHOUSE tries to examine it, but his Occult check can only give him the vague thought it's connected to demonology, but little else beyond that. MAVERICK is cautious, but more concerned about getting to work on the unusually spotless kitchen.
Carefully, MIRANDA removes it and a blaring sounds like something between a horn blast and explosion almost deafens the Agents. It seems to come from everywhere and nowhere, from right next to them and outside at the same time.
Everyone passes a CONx5 check and the subsequent SAN check. Through the living room's window, MIRANDA, MILHOUSE and MAIN see a yellow-cab in the street outside. The cabbie appears to have leaned on the horn as someone crosses the street. They appear heavily dressed for summer, possibly homeless.
Is that a snake draped across their shoulders?
MIRANDA takes a polaroid while MILHOUSE and MAIN head outside to investigate. The picture reveals in sharp clarity, the cabbie staring down the barrel as she snapped the shot directly at her. MAVERICK gets to work in the kitchen and MALATESTA picks over things in the living room and bedroom respectively.
Search rolls for those in the apartment.
Outside, the cab has turned the corner and the pedestrian has carried on, though MAIN and MILHOUSE are able to work out where they went. MILHOUSE heads to cut off the other side of the alley, while MAIN approaches from behind, getting the pedestrian's attention. It's the height of summer in NYC, the air reeks of gasoline, rotting garbage and baking, soiled concrete and asphalt.
MAIN finds a nondescript, seemingly homeless man by the state of his clothes, but with a python draped over his shoulders. MAIN strikes up conversation, lighting a Gitane cigarette and pointing to the snake. From the other end of the alley, MILHOUSE makes his way towards the pair.
MAIN fails an alertness check.
Is this guy sweating? It's hot and he's bundled up like it's winter. Is he sweating? Why isn't he sweating?
Back in the apartment, MAVERICK tests the kitchen for blood and body fluids, breaking out the spray bottle and UV light. There's no cutlery, glassware or dishware anywhere in the room, but as he's lifting what could be a print, finds a mechanical diagram drawn on a napkin taped above the inside of an otherwise empty drawer. MALATESTA & MIRANDA continue their search of the living and bedroom, with MALATESTA finding a card printed with the following:
"For a good time Call D - 999-202-9989"
On the reverse are a series of what appear to be street corner addresses in Brooklyn. Could be a sex-line, could be a way to see Red Band underground film screenings, could be something online related. MALATESTA drifts between a few circles and he pockets it out of curiosity. When MIRANDA locates the grenade in the bedroom, she is careful to give it a wide berth and locates what MAIN missed: a backpack radio in the bedroom's walk-in closet. She calls MALATESTA over.
Back in the alleyway, MILHOUSE rolls under 10% and passes his disguise check. Dressed casually and a college athlete to boot, he fits the general chad look in his New York Knicks shirt despite his academic leanings. Being loud and obnoxious like he's drunk, he barrels into the homeless guy with the snake who stonewalled MAIN.
Instead he hits MAIN as the man with the snake is there and gone in the space between blinks. One moment MAIN is looking at him and then MILHOUSE knocks him flat on his ass. Like a film edit. Just gone. MAIN crit fails his SAN check and takes 4 SAN loss without projecting. Instead, as he scrambles up begins kicking over trash cans and searching the alley while MILHOUSE tries to calm him down and get a handle on things.
As MILHOUSE is talking MAIN out of tearing the alley apart, MIRANDA and MALATESTA check out the radio. As it comes to life, they listen and hear the following:
"Exeter. India. One. Thirteen. Sierra. Twenty. Twenty. Forty-nine."
MAVERICK meanwhile, finding the kitchen bare oddly finds the refrigerator stocked. There isn't much inside, some milk unopened and a pack of cheese and deli meat. Expiration is months ago, but through the plastic and glass of the bottle it looks fresh. Curious, he opens the milk and finds it smells as fresh as the day it was bought. Months ago.
Passes his SAN check. Given what he heard on the tape, it's not the strangest thing today.
MAIN and MILHOUSE detour to grab some more coffees, more to calm MAIN down and give him a (successful CHAx5 check) to flirt with the coffeeshop waitress. On their return, MAIN heads into the bedroom, pulls the pin on the grenade and activates the firing lever.
Nothing happens. His "hunch" was correct. Despite failing to properly identify it, something about the shape of it didn't match modern ordnance. Like the radio, it's vintage and either deactivated or else rendered inert by time and age.
I gave MAIN a SAN point back, because why not?
As things begin winding down, MILHOUSE and MAVERICK puzzle over the weird fridge, with MILHOUSE sacrificing his green tea and MAVERICK a donut to see how "fresh" they are come morning between the fridge and not.

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After 6pm, EST
Between them, M-Cell take the rest of the evening to take care of home-scenes or any unfinished business they can get done with their resources at hand. They also divide the Operational evidence from the Case evidence, with MIRANDA taking the symbol, MALATESTA the backpack radio & phone number, MAVERICK the cassette tape (for obvious reasons) and MAIN the mechanical sketch on the napkin.
MIRANDA and MILHOUSE, using the former's academic credentials both stay on the case, with MIRANDA leaving her photos from the park to develop in her bathroom. While she fails her roll, she does help MILHOUSE identify the demon the symbol refers to and book-related lead. She hits up a criminal contact named Hugo to put out feelers for weird items she may be interested in. He agrees for a fee, which she negotiates in her favour.
Returning to her apartment, MIRANDA finds her photos of the dancing clown and watching crowd have developed. In every photograph, the clown is turned away from her, but the faces in the crowd are looking at her. That's not how she remembers it. Fails a SAN check. Projects on to her editor, knowing she's going to be taking a "personal day" tomorrow, and this after she agreed to go to the grill.
This will have consequences.
MAIN, unnerved by the day's events, not the least of which was being knocked on his ass by a fitter, younger man, heads out. He returns to the coffeeshop he and MILHOUSE visited and takes the waitress he hit on out on a date. After a romantic interlude, MAIN has a new bond. Her name's Marsha, she's 27 and very nice.
Breaking Operational Security, MAVERICK asks MALATESTA to come back to his apartment and check for possible surveillance. Despite suffering comparatively little SAN loss overall, MAVERICK is letting the day's events impact his behaviour.
It's trivially easy for MALATESTA to confirm there are no bugs in place, which really does narrow the options for how the conversation could have been recorded. Thankful, he asks MALATESTA to keep this to himself for now, to which the grunge-kid agrees. MAVERICK drops MALATESTA near his home and leaves, putting the tape in the player of his car as he pulls away.
MALATESTA lives near the Village and diverts to check out the Mercury Gallery. Though closed, it seems legit and he makes a note of it for later. Back at home, he breaks open the backpack radio and examines it. The battery is not connected to the radio itself, the wires having been stripped out, yet he and MIRANDA both heard a voice on the end of its phone-mic. He passes his SAN check and finds in place of one of the transistors a small, black stone which does not feel like stone at all and feels like it's body temperature. MALATESTA leaves it on his desk, covered in a cloth.
Alone in his apartment, MAVERICK watches his phone. The time comes and he does not call Natalie. A moment later, his phone rings.
Alone in the apartment, MAVERICK does not answer.

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Post-Mortem
We ended up playing for a touch longer than I intended, but I knew that would happen by the time the cab sounded its horn. Despite some tiredness and some drinking, we ended up with a really strong session in retrospect, which has set the overall tone of the campaign for me as GM going forward. Between the five players, two have been through one Delta Green campaign, one has experience with Pulp Cthulhu and two have varying levels of exposure. They all roleplayed the f##k out of their characters and while I was worried about just how weird I wanted things to get out the gate, it feels like the balance is correct and I've given enough avenues for further investigation they may want to pursue.
I got a far better sense, as did the players, as to what drives and motivates their characters and how they cope or don't cope with Delta Green work.
MILHOUSE is definitely setting himself up as the curious academic, Iain playing his interest as forever drawn towards what's there "to discover," he said in character. Perhaps a fool and his sanity are easily parted?
MAVERICK is the "all-American", Agent Cooper adjacent FBI Agent who butts up against the para-natural and is seemingly rocked by it, revealing a complicated and perhaps conflicted depth. In his previous operation with MIRANDA, MAVERICK killed one person, but something about this has gotten under his skin. I wonder what Natalie thinks about their missed call?
A hacker by trade, MALATESTA likes a puzzle as much as he does not like the "weird shit." He talks a good talk when it's about something he knows, but is much too shy to chat up his co-worker. He and MAVERICK had some friction in Session 0 when MAVERICK wanted to call him Mal, to which the younger man pushed back against. Yet, he now knows where MAVERICK lives. Maybe he can learn more? What will he do with that? Does he even want to?
As much as MILHOUSE, MIRANDA is likewise driven by curiosity and a need to know, but first and foremost to keep herself safe. She and him are not the same. There's a scar above her hip from a knife, and it still twinges from time to time. She's also the first to directly or indirectly involve a Bond in the investigation. I wonder what Hugo will or won't find? I wonder what those photos mean. MIRANDA wondered aloud whether the crowd or the clown was the "entity." What does that mean?
Despite being built like Jack Reacher (albeit in a sailor suit), MAIN projects a tough air but is clearly a man at the crossroads. He turns 40 before 1995 ends; middle age. When hit with a problem or something he can't otherwise work out, his behaviour swings from one extreme to the other. To date, he's coped with the case by: lashing out at trash cans in an alley. Chatting up a waitress and forming a romantic bond with her. Pulling the pin on a grenade he "thought" could be fake. It's day one. I'm here for it.
Our next session is scheduled for June 7th, 2024.
Until then, be seeing you.

This isn’t meant to be a whine post as I’m generally having a good time, but I really feel like the dominance of Shaman/DK/DH is crowding out the other classes. In general, when the win-rate disparity is greater than 10% between the best and worst class, we need balance changes.
I’d propose the following changes:
Shaman Reduce offering rate for Growfin and Living Prairie
Death Knight Reduce offering rate for Toysnatching Geist and Frost Strike
Demon Hunter Reduce offering rate for Window Shopper
Hunter Reduce offering rate for Messenger Buzzard
Druid Increase offering rate for Park Panther
Priest Increase offering rate for Cathedral of Atonement and Partner in Crime
Warrior Increase offering rate for Anima Extractor and Imbued Axe
I don’t think this will usher in a utopia, but hopefully it’s enough to close the WR gap to under 10%.

It breaks my heart reading this letters but it also show us how magnificent and unbreakable his faith remained until he sadly passed.
Primera carta
21 de octubre de 1972,
Queridos viejos, Rossina y chicos,
Les estoy escribiendo a 8 días de haberse caído el avión. Estamos en un lugar divino, todo cerrado por montañas y con un lago en el fondo que se va a deshelar apenas comience el deshielo.
Estamos todos muy bien, somos en el momento 26 los vivos. Hoy se murió la hermana de Nando Parrado.
La moral existente es increíble y hay colaboración permanente entre todos. Roy [Harley], Diego [Storm], Roberto [Canessa], Carlitos [Páez], y yo, estamos perfectamente bien, solo un poco más flacos y barbudos.
El domingo pasado, pasaron por arriba nuestro dos aviones, dos veces cada uno, por lo que estamos muy tranquilos y lo que es más, convencidos de que nos van a venir a buscar. Lo único que nos hace dudar un poco, es que como el avión se desvió de la ruta, quién sabe todavía si nos vieron. Nuestra fe en Dios es increíble (se podría decir que es común en ciertos casos como este), pero yo creo que está muy por encima.
¿Se preguntan cómo vivimos? Bueno, la verdad que el avión no está todavía perfectamente acondicionado y por el momento no es un gran hotel, pero ya va a quedar bastante bien.
Agua tenemos de sobra, puesto que hacemos constantemente. Comida, tuvimos la suerte de que nos quedara una lata de Costamar, cuatro de dulce, tres latas de mariscos, algunos chocolates y dos botellas de whisky chicas. Por supuesto la comida no es muy abundante que digamos, pero da para vivir.
Los días acá, cuando son lindos, se puede estar afuera hasta más o menos las seis de la tarde, ahora, si están nublados, generalmente nos quedamos en el hotel (avión) y solo sale una pequeña cuadrilla a buscar nieve.
Los cuartos no son muy cómodos, puesto que las habitaciones son para 26 personas (no pudimos conseguir para menos), pero algo es algo. El espacio es un poco reducido, puesto que lo que quedó del avión fue de la cabina (que esta deshecha) hasta la parte de las alas, que quedaron diseminadas muy atrás. Para que hubiera espacio, tuvimos que sacar todos los sillones para afuera y “cuerearlos” para que hubiera mantas para todos. Como verán, poco a poco estamos mejorando el confort.
Los extraño mucho y constantemente le pido a Dios que, por lo menos, si me quiere llevar hacia el infinito, me deje verlos un día más.
No me puedo olvidar de cuando llegaba todas las noches de tu casa, Rossina, y te veía a vos mamá tejiendo o arreglando algo, ni de vos papá, cuando me llevabas a la facultad o cuando charlábamos los sábados (puesto que la verdad, los últimos días te veía poco); culpa mía por supuesto.
Rossina, no podés imaginar lo que te extraño, no tengo manera de decírtelo; suerte que en la billetera tenía una foto tuya y todas las noches antes de acostarme le doy un beso, todo como si estuviera ahí, en tu casa, despidiéndome de ti. Lo único que quiero ahora es llegar, casarme contigo si tú lo quieres.
Pero no puedo pensar mucho en todo esto porque lloro mucho y me dijeron que tratara de no llorar, ya que me deshidrato; es increíble, ¿no?
Mónica, Ale y Raquelina [sus tres hermanos menores], tampoco se pueden imaginar lo que los extraño. Todos ustedes son lo único que tengo, por lo tanto, voy a tratar de sobrevivir de todas formas, si Dios me ayuda para volver a verlos.- Juan [García-Austt, el novio de Mónica, su hermana], tú trata de ser el hermano mayor que yo no pude lograr ser y por favor cuida a Mónica, a los viejos y a Rossina.
Vivimos haciendo chistes con la comida; todos los días a alguien se le ocurre, por supuesto, elegir el desayuno o la comida, y por supuesto ni en el “Bungalow Suizo” se come así (que no se enojen los Camou por esto). Yo los extraño mucho, Cristina, Rosario, Pinocho, Ama, Bettina, Raúl, el Gordo, Marito, Mónica [familiares y primos de su novia Rossina] a todos. Pero yo probablemente si me dieran a elegir, elegiría las comidas de Blanca y los vasos de leche de casa.
Es increíble lo que se puede llegar a valorar las cosas en estos casos. Nada hay como Montevideo, como casa, como poder verlos todo el día, como poder estar contigo Rossina todas las noches.
Ahora están aquí al lado mío: Daniel [Maspons], Diego [Storm], Arturito [Nogueira] y Álvaro [Mangino] y justo estábamos comentando que era muy raro que todavía no hayan aparecido los del rescate, pero a mí se me ocurre que estamos en un lugar bastante inaccesible, que solamente puede verse por tierra y que como hicieron unos días bastante bravos (tuvimos algunos aludes chicos), se han demorado. Esto y la fe en Dios que ahora tenemos es lo que nos conserva tranquilos.
Rezamos todas las noches y las mañanas, y todos los días uno encabeza las oraciones comentando con sus propias palabras el sentido de la oración. Es una manera de darnos fe y ánimo mutuamente.
Todas las noches uno cuenta una anécdota suya y hay algunas muy divertidas, como de suegros y suegras, que ya se las voy a contar algún día. Espero que sea lo más pronto posible.
Lo increíble de todo esto es un amigo que me hice acá, el “Moncho” Sabella, dormimos generalmente juntos y de la mano y nos respiramos constantemente para darnos calor en las noches de frío. Si no hubiera sido por él, pienso que en la primera noche me hubiera muerto, puesto que como el avión estaba deshecho hacía muchísimo frío y esta fue la noche en que se murió el grupo más grande de gente.
Debo destacar entre ellos a Pancho Abal, que murió por tapar a la hermana del Nando, que ya les conté se murió hoy de mañana al lado mío. Carlitos [Páez] le dio masajes, pero ya no había nada que hacer.
Carlitos se fue ayer [20 de octubre], con Roberto Canessa, Numa Turcatti y Fito Strauch, a escalar la montaña por donde se cayó el avión, para ver si podían encontrar la cola y las baterías para poder hablar por radio, puesto que estamos totalmente incomunicados. No pudieron llegar puesto que el tiempo cambió mucho y se les hizo muy brava la caminata, ya que no tenían ningún tipo de aparato para la nieve; con todo, demostraron ser de los tipos más valientes de los que quedaron.
Carlitos es además el “pastillero” del grupo, se encarga de administrar todos los remedios; Roy es el cocinero, se encarga de repartir día a día la “suculenta comida”, lo que hace muy bien, aunque a veces se pasa un poco, pero como estamos entre amigos no pasa nada. Gustavo Zerbino y Roberto Canessa son los médicos, con la colaboración de Diego Storm, por el momento se están portando y hay varios heridos graves que lo están pasando mucho mejor gracias a la ayuda de ellos. Yo como veterinario coopero poco en estos casos.
Bueno, los dejo porque se está haciendo de tardecita y hay mucho trabajo que hacer.
Un beso grande para todos y los volveré a ver si Dios quiere, de no ser así, lo único que les pido es que tengan un gran valor y no se preocupen por mí porque estoy seguro que Dios me llevará con él.
A ti Rossina, ya no sé de qué manera decirte que te quiero y te adoro y que te extraño de una manera tan sobrenatural que nunca hubiera creído yo podría querer así tan intensamente.
Gustavo Diego Nicolich Arocena.
(La carta continúa media página más, pero está en un estado muy deteriorado y contiene frases enteras perdidas, lo que no permite la comprensión.)
First letter
October 21, 1972,
Dear old people, Rossina and boys,
I am writing to you 8 days after the plane crashed. We are in a divine place, all closed by mountains and with a lake in the background that is going to thaw as soon as the thaw begins.
We are all very well, we are currently the 26th alive. Nando Parrado's sister died today.
The existing moral is incredible and there is permanent collaboration between everyone. Roy [Harley], Diego [Storm], Roberto [Canessa], Carlitos [Páez], and I, we are perfectly fine, just a little thinner and bearded.
Last Sunday, our two planes passed over, twice each, so we are very calm and what's more, convinced that they are going to come and look for us. The only thing that makes us doubt a little, is that since the plane deviated from the route, who still knows if they saw us. Our faith in God is incredible (you could say that it is common in certain cases like this), but I think it is far above.
Do you wonder how we live? Well, the truth is that the plane is not yet perfectly conditioned and at the moment it is not a great hotel, but it will look quite good.
We have plenty of water, since we do it constantly. Food, we were lucky that we were left with one can of Costamar, four of sweet, three cans of seafood, some chocolates and two bottles of small whiskey. Of course the food is not very abundant, but it is enough to live on.
The days here, when they are nice, you can be outside until about six in the afternoon, now, if it's cloudy, we usually stay at the hotel (plane) and only a small crew goes out to look for snow.
The rooms are not very comfortable, since the rooms are for 26 people (we couldn't get it for less), but something is something. The space is a little small, since what was left of the plane was from the cabin (which is undone) to the part of the wings, which were scattered far behind. For there to be space, we had to take all the armchairs outside and "cure them" so that there were blankets for everyone. As you will see, little by little we are improving comfort.
I miss them a lot and I constantly ask God that, at least, if he wants to take me to infinity, let me see them one more day.
I can't forget when I came every night from your house, Rossina, and I saw you mom weaving or fixing something, or your dad, when you took me to college or when we chatted on Saturdays (since the truth is, the last few days I saw you little); my fault of course.
Rossina, you can't imagine how much I miss you, I have no way to tell you; luckily I had a picture of you in my wallet and every night before going to bed I kiss him, all as if I were there, at your house, saying goodbye to you. The only thing I want now is to get there, marry you if you want it.
But I can't think much about all this because I cry a lot and they told me to try not to cry, since I get dehydrated; it's incredible, isn't it?
Mónica, Ale and Raquelina [their three younger siblings], can't imagine what I miss them either. All of you are the only thing I have, therefore, I will try to survive anyway, if God helps me to see you again.- Juan [García-Austt, Monica's boyfriend, her sister], you try to be the older brother that I could not be and please take care of Monica, the old people and Rossina.
We live making jokes with food; every day someone thinks, of course, to choose breakfast or food, and of course not even in the "Swiss Bungalow" do you eat like that (don't let the Camou get angry about this). I miss them a lot, Cristina, Rosario, Pinocchio, Ama, Bettina, Raúl, El Gordo, Marito, Mónica [family members and cousins of their girlfriend Rossina] to everyone. But if they gave me a choice, I would choose Blanca's meals and the glasses of milk from home.
It's incredible what you can value things in these cases. There is nothing like Montevideo, like home, like being able to see them all day, like being able to be with you Rossina every night.
Now they are here next to me: Daniel [Maspons], Diego [Storm], Arturito [Nogueira] and Álvaro [Mangino] and we were just commenting that it was very rare that the rescuers have not yet appeared, but it occurs to me that we are in a quite inaccessible place, which can only be seen by land and that as they did a few rather brave days (we had some small avalanches), they have been delayed. This and the faith in God that we now have is what keeps us calm.
We pray every night and morning, and every day one heads the prayers, commenting with his own words on the meaning of the prayer. It's a way to give each other faith and encouragement.
Every night one tells an anecdote of his and there are some very funny ones, such as in-laws and mothers-in-law, which I'm going to tell you someday. I hope it will be as soon as possible.
The incredible thing about all this is a friend I made here, the "Moncho" Sabella, we usually sleep together and hand in hand and we breathe constantly to warm us on cold nights. If it hadn't been for him, I think that on the first night I would have died, since the plane was undone it was very cold and this was the night that the largest group of people died.
I must highlight among them Pancho Abal, who died for covering up the sister of Nando, who I already told them, died today next to me tomorrow. Carlitos [Páez] gave him massages, but there was nothing to do anymore.
Carlitos left yesterday [October 20], with Roberto Canessa, Numa Turcatti and Fito Strauch, to climb the mountain where the plane fell, to see if they could find the queue and the batteries to be able to talk on the radio, since we are totally incommunicado. They couldn't get there since the weather changed a lot and the walk was very brave, since they didn't have any type of snow equipment; nevertheless, they proved to be one of the bravest guys left.
Carlitos is also the "picker" of the group, he is in charge of managing all the remedies; Roy is the cook, he is in charge of distributing the "succulent food" day by day, which he does very well, although sometimes it goes a little, but since we are among friends nothing happens. Gustavo Zerbino and Roberto Canessa are the doctors, with the collaboration of Diego Storm, at the moment they are behaving and there are several serious injuries who are having a much better time thanks to their help. As a veterinarian, I do not cooperate much in these cases.
Well, I'll leave them because it's getting done in the afternoon and there's a lot of work to do.
A big kiss for everyone and I will see you again if God wants, if not, the only thing I ask is that you have great courage and do not worry about me because I am sure that God will take me with him.
To you Rossina, I no longer know how to tell you that I love you and adore you and that I miss you in such a supernatural way that I would never have believed I could want it so intensely.
Gustavo Diego Nicolich Arocena.
(The letter continues half a page more, but it is in a very deteriorated state and contains whole lost sentences, which does not allow understanding.)
Segunda carta
Queridísima Rossina: 22/10/72
Te estoy escribiendo de adentro del avión (nuestro Petit Hotel por el momento), ya es de tardecita y empezó a hacer un poco de frío y a soplar viento, muy común suceda a esta hora.- El día de hoy fue bárbaro, un sol divino y mucho calor, me hacía recordar los días en la playa contigo, pero con la diferencia de ir al medio día a comer contigo a tu casa me tengo que quedar afuera del avión sin comida alguna.- Hoy aparte de todo fue un día un poco depresivo puesto que mucha gente se entró a desanimar (hoy hace 10 días que estamos aquí) pero a mí por suerte todavía no me tocó el desánimo, puesto que con sólo pensar en que te voy a volver a ver, me vienen fuerzas increíbles.-
Otra de las causas del desánimo general es que dentro de un rato se nos acaba la comida, nos quedan nada más que 2 latas de mariscos (chicas), 1 botella de vino blanco y un poco de granadina que indudablemente para 26 hombres (bueno también chicos que quieren ser hombres) no es nada.- Una cosa que te va a parecer increíble a mí también me parece; hoy empezamos a cortar a los muertos para comerlos, no tenemos otro remedio.- Yo por mi parte le pedí a Dios en todo lo posible que nunca llegara este día, pero llegó y tenemos que afrontarlo con valentía y con fé.- Fé porque llegué a la conclusión de que los cuerpos están ahí porque los puso Dios, y como lo único que interesa es el alma, no tengo por qué tener un gran remordimiento y si llegara el día y yo con mi cuerpo pudiera salvar a alguien, gustoso lo haría.-
No sé cómo estarán tú, ni papá ni mamá ni los chicos por ahí, pensar en que están sufriendo no saben cuánto me entristece, vivo pidiéndole a Dios que los tranquilice y les dé valor porque es esta la única manera de salir de esto que creo pronto tendrá un final feliz para todos.-
Cuando me veas te vas a asustar, estoy mugriento, barbudo, un poco flaco, con un tajo grande en la cabeza, otro en la frente que ya se me curó y uno chiquito que me hice hoy trabajando en la cabina del avión, además de pequeños tajos en las piernas y en el hombro, pero con todo estoy muy bien.-
Hoy pudimos recomponer una radio transistor que encontramos el otro día en el avión, Roy la arregló y mañana esperamos tener noticias por algún noticiario chileno o argentino del rescate.- Si lo hubieran suspendido, cosa que yo no creo y a esta altura me parecería increíble, dentro de tres o cuatro días cuando recobremos algo de fuerzas, un grupo creo que nos largamos a atravesar la parte de la Cordillera que nos queda que espero sea poca.-
Por lo que ves no tenemos la menor idea dónde estamos puesto que cuando volamos hacia Chile el piloto creyó haber pasado Curico y en Chile le informaron que descendiera, inmediatamente aminoró la marcha y en unos pocos segundos agarramos unos pozos de aire que nos hacían bajar 1000 a 2000 pies y cuando el mecánico (que está vivo con nosotros, le dio toda la potencia posible, ya era tarde).- El choque fue increíble, yo venía adelante con Diego al lado que venía contra la ventana y no me dió ni tiempo a asustarme porque en el momento que Diego me dijo que mirara por la ventana, la cola se enganchó en la montaña y volaron la alas en el momento.- El Avión enseguida se entró a deslizar por la montaña hacia al mismo tiempo que entraba nieve por los boquetes y nos iba congelando de a poco hasta que de pronto se detuvo.- Diego y Yo quedamos amarrados por los asientos boca abajo (puesto que en el ínterin el avión se inclinó).- Lo que nos pareció a la mayoría luego increíble fue que lo primero que hicimos fue preguntar por todos nosotros Carlitos, Gordo, Diego, Roy, Moncho, Gordo Echavarren es decir todos nosotros más 2 que ya habíamos salido juntos en Mendoza.- Tuvimos la suerte que Dios quiso que estuviéramos todos.- En seguida Roberto Canesa-Gustavo Zerbino-Daniel Maspons y Marcelo Perez,que fueron los que quedaron libres, enseguida empezaron a ayudar a todos.- Yo pude salir al rato y enseguida saqué a Diego y con Diego al Gordo Echavarren; al poco tiempo estábamos casi todos liberados.-
En seguida oscureció y fue la noche más larga fría y triste de mi vida, parecía las descripciones del infierno del Dante, eran unos gritos tras otros, un frío infernal que entraba por todos lados puesto que no pudimos tapar nada y algunos pasajeros que no los habíamos podido sacar totalmente de sus lugares, y tuvieron que dormir enganchados en sus lugares y lamentablemente a la mañana siguiente varios murieron.- Indudablemente nunca ninguno podrá volver a sufrir lo que sufrimos esa noche, pero por suerte ya pasó.- Yo probablemente la aguanté porque viví toda la noche pensando en ti y en los viejos y gracias a Moncho Sabella, un gran amigo que me hice en este viaje y que pronto lo vas a conocer, de no haber sido en parte por él me hubiera muerto de frío y de ataque de histerismo porque fue horrible.- Moncho es un gran tipo y tiene en común conmigo en que le gusta el Tambo y tiene uno y él y Coche Inciarte me envalaron para que me dedicara a eso y yo la idea que tengo ahora es volver a verte, casarme contigo lo más pronto posible e irnos a vivir a alguna chacrita apartada que estoy seguro voy a conseguir.-
Todo esto es muy lindo, pero tengo un poco de miedo de que si esto se prolonga mucho, cómo quedaré mentalmente, espero no me pase nada, pero si no me vas a tener que ayudar mucho.-
Rossi andá pidiéndole permiso ya a Bettina para venir este verano a La Paloma conmigo, pero no por una semana sino por todo el verano, porque después de esto yo no puedo ni tengo valor para estar ni un segundo lejos de ti.- En todo caso decile a Bettina que se venga con nosotros y si querés a Ana.- Yo también los extraño mucho. - Hoy de mañana me acordaba de los días en La Paloma en lo de Cecilia de Luisa, Patricia, René y de todos tus amigos, y pensando son la cosa más divina que conocí; también pensaba en cuando me enojaba contigo por “4B” y otras cosas y me parecía tan increíble poderme enojar contigo que desde aquí en los Andes te pido me lo perdones y nunca te acuerdes de cosas malas de mí.-Me acordaba de cuando fuimos al cine a ver “Amigos”, qué lindo si pudiéramos ser así.- Me acuerdo cuando me ayudaste a hacer la valija y cuando me ordenabas la ropa.- Hablando de esto decile a mamá que el botón del saco que me cosió se me salió pero que por suerte lo encontré, me acuerdo también de la ida de Juan y Mónica y Ale a Tom Tom.-
Pobre Ale decile que le perdí las camisas pero que le prometo le voy a llevar todas las que pueda.- También extraño las llamadas por teléfono que atendía para Raque y cuando me servía la comida cuando yo llegaba tarde, pensar todo lo que tengo y nunca lo llegué a valorar, es increíble tengo todo lo que quiero y con todo estoy inconforme.-
Por suerte el otro día me encontré una medalla en el avión, son 1000 pesos uruguayos y no tiene nada que ver con Dios ni con religión pero a mi me recuerda la que te regalé a ti y me hace sentir muy cerca tuyo y de Dios. —Hoy es domingo y ahora tenemos que resar una oración personal en voz alta c/u en vez de ir a misa.- Esto también me hace acordar a mamá cuando me dijo: “qué lástima que yo no iba a misa contigo todos los domingos”, pensar que yo no le hice caso y no sabés cuánto me arrepiento ahora.-
Recién se les ocurrió jugar a las películas, me parece increíble, como si estuviera contigo en lo de Brynard con Amalita y Pepe riéndonos y jorobando todos juntos; qué divino me acuerdo de Amalita cuando chillaba porque le robaba la comida; cuánto también no daría ahora por vasos de leche y los turrones.-
Todo todo es increíble cómo lo valoro, por ejemplo me acuerdo cuando Marito se reía porque yo comía cualquier cosa, no sabés lo que pagaríamos ahora por cualquier cosa de esas y no la comería como cualquier cosa sino como un manjar especial.-
Ahora estamos acostados, Roy –Carlitos y Diego enfrente el Gordo y Moncho a los costados, acabamos de comer un poco de marisco, una porción más chica que lo que podría caber en una tapa de whisky un poco de vino blanco mendocino, que lo servimos en las tapitas de los cargadores de gas que te había comprado para el yesquero.-Ah no sabés, estoy repleto, no doy más, quisiera saber quién se pueda dar estos placeres en el medio de la Cordillera!
Ahora dentro de un ratito va a oscurecer y yo Rossi voy a tratar de dormirme pensando en que estoy en tu casa contigo bien al lado tomando un cafecito con un puchito, no Rossi, qué lindo dentro de unos días podrá ser, bueno chau Rossi un beso grandote, mil besos hasta mañana.-
Gustavo.
Second letter
Dearest Rossina: 10/22/72
I'm writing to you from inside the plane (our Petit Hotel for the moment), it's already in the afternoon and it started to get a little cold and wind blowing, very common to happen at this time.- Today was barbaric, a divine sun and a lot of heat, it reminded me of the days at the beach with you, but with the difference of going to lunch with you at your house I have to stay outside the plane without any food.- Today apart from everything it was a slightly depressive day since many people got discouraged (today We've been here for 10 days) but luckily I still haven't got discouraged, since just thinking about what I'm going to see you again, I get incredible strength.-
Another cause of the general discouragement is that in a while we will run out of food, we have nothing more than 2 cans of seafood (girls), 1 bottle of white wine and a little grenadine that undoubtedly for 26 men (well also guys who want to be men) is nothing.- One thing that is going to you will seem incredible to me too it seems to me; today we start to cut the dead to eat them, we have no other remedy.- For my part I asked God in every possible that this day never came, but it arrived and we have to face it with courage and faith.- Faith because I came to the conclusion that the bodies are there because God put them, and since the only thing that interests is the soul, I don't have to have great remorse and if the day came and I with my body I could save someone, I would gladly do it.-
I don't know how you will be, neither dad nor mom nor the boys out there, thinking that they are suffering they don't know how sad it makes me, I live asking God to reassure them and give them courage because this is the only way to get out of this that I think will soon have a happy ending for everyone.-
When you see me you're going to get scared, I'm dirty, bearded, a little skinny, with a big cut on my head, another one on my forehead that has already been healed and a little one that I did today working in the cabin of the plane, in addition to small cuts in my legs and shoulder, but with everything I'm very well.-
Today we were able to recompose a transistor radio that we found the other day on the plane, Roy fixed it and tomorrow we hope to have news from some Chilean or Argentine newscast of the rescue.- If they had suspended it, which I do not believe and at this point it would seem incredible to me, in three or four days when we regain some strength, a group I think we will go to cross the part of the Cordillera that we have left that I hope is little.-
From what you see we have no idea where we are since when we flew to Chile the pilot thought he had passed Curico and in Chile they informed him to descend, he immediately slowed down and in a few seconds we grabbed some air wells that made us go down 1000 to 2000 feet and when the mechanic (who is alive with us, gave him all the possible power, it was already late).- The crash was incredible, I came forward with Diego next to the side who was coming against the window and he didn't even give me time to be scared because at the moment that Diego He told me to look out the window, the tail hooked on the mountain and the wings flew at the moment.- The Plane immediately went in to slide down the mountain towards the same time that snow entered through the holes and was freezing us little by little until it suddenly stopped.- Diego and I were tied by the seats upside down (since in the meantime the plane tilted).- What seemed to most of us then incredible was that the first thing we did was ask for all of us Carlitos, Gordo, Diego, Roy, Moncho, Gordovar Echaren that is to say all of us plus 2 who had already gone out together in Mendoza.- We were lucky that God wanted us all to be there.- Immediately Roberto Canesa-Gustavo Zerbino-Daniel Maspons and Marcelo Perez, who were the ones who were free, they immediately began to help everyone.- I was able to go out after a while and I immediately took Diego and Diego to the Gordo Echavarren; soon we were almost all freed.-
Immediately it darkened and it was the longest cold and saddest night of my life, it seemed like the descriptions of Dante's hell, they were some screams after another, a hellish cold that entered everywhere since we could not cover anything and some passengers who had not been able to take them totally out of their places, and they had to sleep hooked in their places and unfortunately the next morning several died.- Undoubtedly no one will ever be able to suffer again what we suffered that night, but luckily it already happened. - I probably endured it because I lived all night thinking about you and in the old ones and thanks to Moncho Sabella, a great friend that I made on this trip and that you will soon meet him, if it had not been partly for him I would have died of cold and an attack of hystericism because it was horrible.- Moncho is a great guy and he has in common with me that he likes the Tambo and he has one and he and Coche Inciarte they packed me so that I would dedicate myself to that and I have now the idea I have now is to see you again, marry you as soon as possible and go to live in some apart chacrita that I'm sure I'm going to get.-
All this is very nice, but I'm a little afraid that if this lasts a long time, how will I look mentally, I hope nothing happens to me, but if not you're going to have to help me a lot.-
Rossi is asking Bettina's permission to come this summer to La Paloma with me, but not for a week but for the whole summer, because after this I can't and I don't have the courage to be a second away from you. - In any case tell Bettina to come with us and if you want Ana. - I also miss them a lot. - Today tomorrow I remembered the days in La Paloma in what Cecilia de Luisa, Patricia, René and all your friends, and thinking they are the most divine thing I knew; I also thought when I got angry with you for "4B" and other things and it seemed so incredible to be able to get angry with you that from here in the Andes I ask you to forgive me and never remember bad things about me.-I remembered when we went to the movies to see "Friends", how nice if we could be like that.- I remember when you helped me make the suitcase and when you ordered my clothes.- Speaking of this, tell mom that the button on the sack that sewed me came out but that luckily I found it, I also remember Juan's way and Monica and Ale to Tom Tom.-
Poor Ale told him that I lost his shirts but I promise I will take him as many as I can.- I also miss the phone calls he answered for Raque and when he served me the food when I was late, think about everything I have and I never got to value it, it's incredible I have everything I want and with everything I'm dissatisfied.-
Luckily the other day I found a medal on the plane, it's 1000 Uruguayan pesos and it has nothing to do with God or religion but it reminds me of the one I gave you and it makes me feel very close to you and God. -Today is Sunday and now we have to say a personal prayer out loud instead of going to Mass.- This also reminds me of mom when she told me: "what a pity that I didn't go to Mass with you every Sunday", to think that I didn't listen to her and I didn't You know how much I regret it now.-
It just occurred to them to play the movies, I find it incredible, as if I were with you in Brynard with Amalita and Pepe laughing and humping all together; how divine I remember Amalita when she screamed because she stole her food; how much I would also not give now for glasses of milk and nougats.-
Everything is incredible how I value it, for example I remember when Marito laughed because I ate anything, you don't know what we would pay now for any of those things and I wouldn't eat it like anything but as a special delicacy.
Now we are lying down, Roy -Carlitos and Diego in front of the Gordo and Moncho on the sides, we just ate some seafood, a smaller portion than what could fit in a whiskey lid a little Mendoza white wine, which we serve on the lids of the gas chargers that I had bought for the yoer.-Ah you don't know, I'm full, I don't give more, I would like to know who can give these pleasures in the middle of the Cordillera!
Now in a little while it's going to get dark and I Rossi I'm going to try to fall asleep thinking that I'm at your house with you right next door having a coffee with a little puchito, not Rossi, how nice in a few days it can be, well bye Rossi a big kiss, a thousand kisses see you tomorrow.-
Gustavo.

Who was John? What did he do? Why did he come? How does he relate with Yeshua Hamashiach?
”“Comfort, O comfort My people,” says your God. “Speak to the heart of Jerusalem; And call out to her, that her warfare has been fulfilled, That her iniquity has been removed, That she has received from the hand of Yahweh Double for all her sins.” ¶A voice is calling, “Prepare the way for Yahweh in the wilderness; Make smooth in the desert a highway for our God. “Let every valley be lifted up, And every mountain and hill be made low; And let the rough ground become a plain, And the rugged terrain a broad valley; Then the glory of Yahweh will be revealed, And all flesh will see it together; For the mouth of Yahweh has spoken.” A voice says, “Call out.” Then he answered, “What shall I call out?” All flesh is grass, and all its lovingkindness is like the flower of the field. The grass withers, the flower fades, When the breath of Yahweh blows upon it; Surely the people are grass. The grass withers, the flower fades, But the word of our God stands forever. ¶Get yourself up on a high mountain, O Zion, bearer of good news, Raise up your voice powerfully, O Jerusalem, bearer of good news; Raise it up, do not fear. Say to the cities of Judah, “Behold your God!” Behold, Lord Yahweh will come with strength, With His arm ruling for Him. Behold, His reward is with Him And His recompense before Him. Like a shepherd He will shepherd His flock; In His arm He will gather the lambs And carry them in His bosom; He will gently lead the nursing ewes. ¶Who has measured the waters in the hollow of His hand, And encompassed the heavens by the span, And calculated the dust of the earth by the measure, And weighed the mountains in a balance And the hills in a pair of scales? Who has encompassed the Spirit of Yahweh, Or as His counselor has informed Him? With whom did He take counsel and who gave Him understanding? And who taught Him in the path of justice and taught Him knowledge And made Him know the way of understanding? Behold, the nations are like a drop from a bucket, And are counted as a speck of dust on the scales; Behold, He lifts up the coastlands like fine dust. Even Lebanon is not enough to burn, Nor its beasts enough for a burnt offering. All the nations are as nothing before Him; They are counted by Him as non-existent and utterly formless. ¶To whom then will you liken God? Or what likeness will you compare with Him? As for the graven images, a craftsman casts it, A goldsmith plates it with gold, And a silversmith fashions chains of silver. He who is too impoverished to make such a contribution Chooses a tree that does not rot; He seeks out for himself a wise craftsman To prepare a graven image that will not be shaken. ¶Do you not know? Have you not heard? Has it not been declared to you from the beginning? Have you not understood from the foundations of the earth? It is He who inhabits above the circle of the earth, And its inhabitants are like grasshoppers; It is He who stretches out the heavens like a curtain And spreads them out like a tent to inhabit. It is He who reduces rulers to nothing, Who makes the judges of the earth utterly formless. Scarcely have they been planted; Scarcely have they been sown; Scarcely has their stem taken root in the earth, But He merely blows on them, and they wither, And the storm carries them away like stubble. “To whom then will you liken Me That I would be his equal?” says the Holy One. Lift up your eyes on high And see who has created these stars, The One who leads forth their host by number, He calls them all by name; Because of the greatness of His vigor and the strength of His power, Not one of them is missing. ¶Why do you say, O Jacob, and assert, O Israel, “My way is hidden from Yahweh, And the justice due me passes by my God”? Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Everlasting God, Yahweh, the Creator of the ends of the earth, Does not become weary or tired. His understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the weary, And to him who lacks vigor He increases might. Though youths grow weary and tired, And choice young men stumble badly, Yet those who hope in Yahweh Will gain new power; They will mount up with wings like eagles; They will run and not get tired; They will walk and not become weary.“ ‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭40‬:‭1‬-‭31‬ ‭LSB‬‬
”“Behold, I am going to send My messenger, and he will prepare the way before Me. And the Lord, whom you seek, will suddenly come to His temple; and the messenger of the covenant, in whom you delight, behold, He is coming,” says Yahweh of hosts. “But who can endure the day of His coming? And who can stand when He appears? For He is like a smelter’s fire and like fullers’ soap. And He will sit as a smelter and purifier of silver, and He will purify the sons of Levi and refine them like gold and silver, so that they may present to Yahweh offerings in righteousness. Then the offering of Judah and Jerusalem will be pleasing to Yahweh as in the ancient days and as in former years. “Then I will draw near to you for judgment; and I will be a swift witness against the sorcerers and against the adulterers and against those who swear falsely and against those who oppress the wage earner in his wages, the widow and the orphan, and those who turn aside the sojourner and do not fear Me,” says Yahweh of hosts. “For I, Yahweh, do not change; therefore you, O sons of Jacob, are not consumed. “From the days of your fathers you have turned aside from My statutes and have not kept them. Return to Me, and I will return to you,” says Yahweh of hosts. “But you say, ‘How shall we return?’ “Will a man rob God? Yet you are robbing Me! But you say, ‘How have we robbed You?’ In tithes and contributions. You are cursed with a curse, for you are robbing Me, the whole nation of you! Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, so that there may be food in My house, and test Me now in this,” says Yahweh of hosts, “if I will not open for you the windows of heaven and empty out for you a blessing until it is beyond enough. Then I will rebuke the devourer for you so that it will not corrupt the fruits of the ground; nor will your vine in the field fail to bear,” says Yahweh of hosts. “So all the nations will call you blessed, for you shall be a delightful land,” says Yahweh of hosts. “Your words have been strong against Me,” says Yahweh. “But you say, ‘What have we spoken against You?’ You have said, ‘It is worthless to serve God; and what gain is it that we have kept His charge and that we have walked in mourning before Yahweh of hosts? So now we call the arrogant blessed; not only are the doers of wickedness built up, but they also test God and escape.’ ” Then those who feared Yahweh spoke to one another, and Yahweh gave heed and heard it, and a book of remembrance was written before Him for those who fear Yahweh and who think upon His name. “And they will be Mine,” says Yahweh of hosts, “on the day that I prepare My own treasured possession, and I will spare them as a man spares his own son who serves him.” So you will return and see the distinction between the righteous and the wicked, between one who serves God and one who does not serve Him.“ ‭‭Malachi‬ ‭3‬:‭1‬-‭18‬ ‭LSB‬‬
”“For behold, the day is coming, burning like a furnace; and all the arrogant and every worker of wickedness will be chaff; and the day that is coming will set them aflame,” says Yahweh of hosts, “so that it will leave them neither root nor branch.” “But for you who fear My name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings; and you will go forth and skip about like calves from the stall. And you will tread down the wicked, for they will be ashes under the soles of your feet on the day which I am preparing,” says Yahweh of hosts. “Remember the law of Moses My servant, even the statutes and judgments which I commanded him in Horeb for all Israel. “Behold, I am going to send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and awesome day of Yahweh. And he will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children and the hearts of the children to their fathers, lest I come and strike the land, devoting it to destruction.”“ ‭‭Malachi‬ ‭4‬:‭1‬-‭6‬ ‭LSB‬‬
”Inasmuch as many have undertaken to compile an account of the things that have been fulfilled among us, just as those, who from the beginning were eyewitnesses and servants of the word, handed them down to us, it seemed fitting for me as well, having investigated everything carefully from the beginning, to write it out for you in orderly sequence, most excellent Theophilus, so that you may know the certainty about the things you have been taught. In the days of Herod, king of Judea, there was a priest named Zechariah, of the division of Abijah, and he had a wife from the daughters of Aaron, and her name was Elizabeth. And they were both righteous in the sight of God, walking blamelessly in all the commandments and righteous requirements of the Lord. But they had no child, because Elizabeth was barren, and they were both advanced in years. Now it happened that while he was performing his priestly service before God in the order of his division, according to the custom of the priestly office, he was chosen by lot to enter the sanctuary of the Lord and burn incense. And the whole multitude of the people were praying outside at the hour of the incense offering. And an angel of the Lord appeared to him, standing to the right of the altar of incense. And Zechariah was troubled when he saw the angel, and fear fell upon him. But the angel said to him, “Do not be afraid, Zechariah, for your prayer has been heard, and your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you will call his name John. And you will have joy and gladness, and many will rejoice at his birth. For he will be great in the sight of the Lord; and he will not drink any wine or strong drink, and he will be filled with the Holy Spirit while yet in his mother’s womb. And he will turn many of the sons of Israel back to the Lord their God. And he will go before Him in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the fathers back to the children, and the disobedient to the attitude of the righteous, to make ready a people prepared for the Lord.” And Zechariah said to the angel, “How will I know this? For I am an old man and my wife is advanced in years.” And the angel answered and said to him, “I am Gabriel, who stands before God, and I was sent to speak to you and to bring you this good news. And behold, you shall be silent and unable to speak until the day when these things take place, because you did not believe my words, which will be fulfilled in their proper time.” And the people were waiting for Zechariah, and were wondering at his delay in the sanctuary. But when he came out, he was unable to speak to them, and they realized that he had seen a vision in the sanctuary. And he kept making signs to them, and remained mute. And it happened that when the days of his priestly service were fulfilled, he went back home. After these days Elizabeth his wife conceived, and she kept herself in seclusion for five months, saying, “This is the way the Lord has dealt with me in the days when He looked upon me to take away my disgrace among men.” Now in the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent from God to a city in Galilee called Nazareth, to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David, and the virgin’s name was Mary. And coming in, he said to her, “Greetings, favored one! The Lord is with you.” But she was very perplexed at this statement, and was pondering what kind of greeting this was. And the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God. And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall name Him Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High, and the Lord God will give Him the throne of His father David, and He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and there will be no end of His kingdom.” But Mary said to the angel, “How will this be, since I am a virgin?” The angel answered and said to her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; and for that reason the holy Child shall be called the Son of God. And behold, your relative Elizabeth has also conceived a son in her old age; and this is the sixth month for her who was called barren. For nothing will be impossible with God.” And Mary said, “Behold, the slave of the Lord; may it be done to me according to your word.” And the angel departed from her. Now at this time Mary arose and went in a hurry to the hill country, to a city of Judah, and entered the house of Zechariah and greeted Elizabeth. And it happened that when Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting, the baby leaped in her womb, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. And she cried out with a loud voice and said, “Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb! And how has it happened to me, that the mother of my Lord would come to me? For behold, when the sound of your greeting reached my ears, the baby leaped in my womb for joy. And blessed is she who believed that there would be a fulfillment of what had been spoken to her by the Lord.” And Mary said: “My soul magnifies the Lord, And my spirit has rejoiced in God my Savior. “For He has looked upon the humble state of His slave, For behold, from this time on, all generations will count me blessed. “For the Mighty One has done great things for me, And holy is His name. “And His mercy is upon generation after generation Toward those who fear Him. “He has done a mighty deed with His arm; He has scattered those who were proud in the thoughts of their heart. “He has brought down rulers from their thrones, And has exalted those who were humble. “He has filled the hungry with good things, And sent away the rich empty-handed. “He has given help to Israel His servant, In remembrance of His mercy, As He spoke to our fathers, To Abraham and his seed forever.” And Mary stayed with her about three months, and then returned to her home. Now the time was fulfilled for Elizabeth to give birth, and she gave birth to a son. And her neighbors and her relatives heard that the Lord had magnified His great mercy toward her, and they were rejoicing with her. And it happened that on the eighth day they came to circumcise the child, and they were going to call him Zechariah, after the name of his father. But his mother answered and said, “No, but he shall be called John.” And they said to her, “There is no one among your relatives who is called by this name.” And they were making signs to his father, as to what he wanted him called. And he asked for a tablet and wrote as follows, “His name is John.” And they all marveled. And at once his mouth was opened and his tongue loosed, and he began to speak, blessing God. And fear came on all those living around them, and all these matters were being talked about in all the hill country of Judea. And all who heard these things put them in their heart, saying, “What then will this child be?” For the hand of the Lord was indeed with him. And his father Zechariah was filled with the Holy Spirit, and prophesied, saying: “Blessed be the Lord God of Israel, For He visited and accomplished redemption for His people, And raised up a horn of salvation for us In the house of David His servant— As He spoke by the mouth of His holy prophets from of old— Salvation from our enemies, And from the hand of all who hate us, To show mercy toward our fathers, And to remember His holy covenant, The oath which He swore to Abraham our father, To grant us that we, being rescued from the hand of our enemies, Might serve Him without fear, In holiness and righteousness before Him all our days. “And you, child, will be called the prophet of the Most High, For you will go on before the Lord to make ready His ways, To give to His people the knowledge of salvation By the forgiveness of their sins, Because of the tender mercy of our God, With which the Sunrise from on high will visit us, To shine upon those who sit in darkness and the shadow of death, To direct our feet into the way of peace.” And the child continued to grow and to become strong in spirit, and he lived in the desolate regions until the day of his public appearance to Israel.“ ‭‭Luke‬ ‭1‬:‭1‬-‭80‬ ‭LSB‬‬
”Now in those days John the Baptist *came, preaching in the wilderness of Judea, saying, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.” For this is the one referred to by Isaiah the prophet, saying, “The voice of one crying in the wilderness, ‘Make ready the way of the Lord, Make His paths straight!’ ” Now John himself had a garment of camel’s hair and a leather belt around his waist; and his food was locusts and wild honey. Then Jerusalem was going out to him, and all Judea, and all the district around the Jordan; and they were being baptized by him in the Jordan River, as they confessed their sins. But when he saw many of the Pharisees and Sadducees coming for his baptism, he said to them, “You brood of vipers, who warned you to flee from the wrath to come? Therefore bear fruit in keeping with repentance; and do not suppose that you can say to yourselves, ‘We have Abraham for our father’; for I say to you that from these stones God is able to raise up children to Abraham. And the axe is already laid at the root of the trees; therefore every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. “As for me, I baptize you with water for repentance, but He who is coming after me is mightier than I, and I am not fit to remove His sandals; He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire. His winnowing fork is in His hand, and He will thoroughly clear His threshing floor; and He will gather His wheat into the barn, but He will burn up the chaff with unquenchable fire.” Then Jesus *arrived from Galilee at the Jordan coming to John to be baptized by him. But John tried to prevent Him, saying, “I have need to be baptized by You, and do You come to me?” But Jesus answered and said to him, “Permit it at this time; for in this way it is fitting for us to fulfill all righteousness.” Then he *permitted Him. And after being baptized, Jesus came up immediately from the water; and behold, the heavens were opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and coming upon Him, and behold, there was a voice out of the heavens saying, “This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well-pleased.”“ ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭3‬:‭1‬-‭17‬ ‭LSB‬‬
”Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. And after He had fasted forty days and forty nights, He then became hungry. And the tempter came and said to Him, “If You are the Son of God, command that these stones become bread.” But He answered and said, “It is written, ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God.’ ” Then the devil *took Him into the holy city and had Him stand on the pinnacle of the temple, and *said to Him, “If You are the Son of God, throw Yourself down; for it is written, ‘He will command His angels concerning You’; and ‘On their hands they will bear You up, Lest You strike Your foot against a stone.’ ” Jesus said to him, “Again, it is written, ‘You shall not put the Lord your God to the test.’ ” Again, the devil *took Him to a very high mountain and *showed Him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory; and he said to Him, “All these things I will give You, if You fall down and worship me.” Then Jesus *said to him, “Go, Satan! For it is written, ‘You shall worship the Lord your God, and serve Him only.’ ” Then the devil *left Him; and behold, angels came and began to minister to Him. Now when Jesus heard that John had been taken into custody, He departed into Galilee; and leaving Nazareth, He came and lived in Capernaum, which is by the sea, in the region of Zebulun and Naphtali, in order that what was spoken through Isaiah the prophet would be fulfilled, saying, “The land of Zebulun and the land of Naphtali, By the way of the sea, beyond the Jordan, Galilee of the Gentiles— The people who were sitting in darkness saw a great Light, And those who were sitting in the land and shadow of death, Upon them a Light dawned.” From that time Jesus began to preach and say, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.” Now as Jesus was walking by the Sea of Galilee, He saw two brothers, Simon who was called Peter, and Andrew his brother, casting a net into the sea; for they were fishermen. And He *said to them, “Follow Me, and I will make you fishers of men.” And immediately they left their nets and followed Him. And going on from there He saw two other brothers, James the son of Zebedee, and John his brother, in the boat with Zebedee their father, mending their nets; and He called them. And immediately they left the boat and their father, and followed Him. And Jesus was going throughout all Galilee, teaching in their synagogues and preaching the gospel of the kingdom, and healing every kind of disease and every kind of sickness among the people. And the news about Him spread throughout all Syria; and they brought to Him all who were ill, those suffering with various diseases and pains, demoniacs, epileptics, paralytics; and He healed them. And large crowds followed Him from Galilee and the Decapolis and Jerusalem and Judea and from beyond the Jordan.“ ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭4‬:‭1‬-‭25‬ ‭LSB‬‬

SUPER LONG POST AHEAD. Thanks in advance sa mga magtiya tiyaga to read.
32F - mom of a 6 year old handsome boi.
Anyway, never ako naging okay sa mom ng husband ko dahil ayaw niya na sakin 14 years ago pa lang. Yung mga naging ex kasi ni H ay kung hindi doctor ay lawyer na ngayon. Meanwhile, when we first met before, I was 1st year college in BA Communications and he just finished college. Hindi ako nakapagtapos nang pag aaral dahil nag handle ako ng family business namin, which is during that time, pawnshop. Pag pumupunta ako sa kanila noon, hindi ako pinapansin ng mom ni H or pinagmamano man lang. Kinakausap ako ng ate ni H na hayaan ko na lang raw at ganon daw talaga ang ugali ng mom nila. I refused and continue pleasing her with every chance I got. Kailangan ng gamit sa bahay na wala sila, meron kami, generator, kakilalang electrician, bibilhan ng murang ganito, murang ganyan, pagawa ng cake or ng ganito, lahat inoffer ko. Dating municipal councilor ang dad ko kaya marami rin kaming connections kahit papano.
Then some time at 7 years na pagsasama namin, naghiwalay kami ni H dahil sa maraming bagay, during that time, pinipilit niya kong mag aral, hindi niya na ko mapagtanggol sa mom niya for i don’t know reasons kahit palala na nang palala yung mga sinasabi about me kahit wala naman akong ginagawa. Gusto ko rin naman mag aral nung time na yon but I cannot afford to dahil pa take off yung business namin and we were earning 6 digits that time in 2 weeks alone so it was really hard for me to let go dahil yung mga kapatid ko ay may mga pamilya na. Akala ko, for good na ang break up namin dahil napagod na rin ako kakapaintindi sa kanya ng mga bagay bagay, isa na ron ang time na hindi niya mabigay, gets ko yung busy sa work pero yung 4 na sunod sunod na okasyon (anniversary, birthday, christmas, at new year) na walang kahit isang tangkay ng rose or kahit samahan man lang ako magblow ng candle cake sa birthday ko, pulled the trigger on me. Money was not an issue because he was earning so good na nung mga panahon na yon. Isa pa yung continuous na pagsasabi sakin ng mom niya ng kung ano ano na kesyo baka raw inuubos ko yung savings niya at siya raw ang gumagastos saming dalawa, which was never true, he continuously asked me to let him handle it and hanggat kaya ko raw, wag ko na munang kausapin yung mom niya para daw mas lalong di mag init. As much as I wanted to, mas pinili kong irespeto yung desisyon niya as a partner at yung mom niya as a mother. Kahit alam ko yung capability ko into handling things and speaking in a well mannered way. So, we broke up dahil nagheld lang nang matagal yung mga bagay bagay.
The business was doing so well, nag expand na rin kami, may namet akong guy somewhere and we went on a couple of dates dahil gusto ko na makamove on agad, then one day, nagkita kami ni H sa isang kainan and kasama ko yung guy so nagalit siya kaagad because, tbh, wala pang 2 months yung breakup. Sinabi niya yon sa lahat ng family members nila and the next thing I know, galit na silang lahat sakin pati ate niya. After few months ulit, nagkausap kami ni H and wala na rin kaming strings pa nung guy because bumalik na siya sa ex niya. We fixed our relationship and realized that we really want to be together. It took a lot of efforts sa pagwowork out ng mga bagay bagay at pagtatago sa mga tao because ayaw niya pa na malaman ng family niya na nagkabalikan na kami because galit na galit sila sakin. 1 year after, binati ko yung ate niya thru sms ng “happy mother’s day ate, pati kay tita”, because I thought it’s about time. Sinabi ko naman yun kay H and akala niya it wouldn’t matter pero nag fire yun ng malaking issue sa family niya because nalaman na nagkabalikan kami. Maraming sinabing masasakit na salita yung ate at mom niya sakin, like hindi raw ako nakapagtapos nang pag aaral at iyon raw ba ang ituturo ko sa magiging anak ko, turns out nalaman pa pala nila yung about sa SA case ko before at kasalanan ko raw yun dahil kung kani kanino raw ako sumasama, padalos dalos daw ako sa mga desisyon ko at hindi raw nila gusto kung paano ako mag isip, just because I went out on a date with a guy after we broke up. All I said was hindi naman nila alam kung anong mga pinagdaanan namin sa relasyon kaya wala silang karapatang husgahan ang buong pagkatao ko.
They asked me to stay away from Husband and their family. Madugong usap ang nangyari samin ni H, I asked him to make up his mind dahil naiintindihan ko na pamilya pa rin sila at ayokong gumawa siya ng desisyon na pagsisisihan niya rin sa huli. After all, sinabihan siya ng kapatid niya na sarili lang ang iniisip when all he did was return the favors to his parents and support them financially. He was indeed a good son. But, nagmatigas na siya that time and he chose me. We went on our lives, nagbibigay siya sa parents niya ng monthly financial support and made sure na di naman sila deprived of anything dahil pareho naman silang well off na ng ate niya. We got married and tried to invite them pero dad niya lang ang umattend who never got involved sa mga past issues, mabait naman dad niya pero sadyang tahimik lang talaga at hindi na piniling makisali pa noon, hindi ko na masyadong ginawang big deal dahil nakita ko kung paano siya makipag usap sa mom ni H noon na parang sumuko na lang siya sa ugali at hinayaan na lang na siya ang mag desisyon ng lahat. Anyway, wala na silang narinig sakin after nila ko sabihan nang mas marami pang masasakit na salita mismong araw ng kasal namin, lahat yon thru facebook messenger or sms, at wala silang ni ho or ni ha natanggap mula sakin dahil hindi ako pinalaki ng magulang ko na pinipilit ang mga taong may ayaw sakin sa mga dahilan na sila lang ang may gawa. Okay na okay si Hubby ko sa parents ko, lalo sa dad ko.
Fast forward, nagkaroon na kami ng pamilya. Si Hubby, tuloy pa rin ang pag iinvite sa pamilya niya na dumalo sa mga okasyon ng pamilya namin. Nakabili na kami ng lupa, sariling bahay, masasabi naming comfortable kami sa buhay na meron kami, at lahat yon pareho naming pinaghirapan habang tumutulong kami pareho sa mga kanya kanya naming pamilya. Never ko siyang pinigilan na mangumbida sa pamilya niya sa mga celebrations namin, pero never naman silang umattend, except sa father in law ko. Hanggang sa last year, Christmas, kinumbinsi ako ng asawa ko na mag celebrate ng christmas eve sa family house nila, tumanggi ako, niluhuran niya pa ko at araw araw akong kinukumbinsi, binibigyan ng kung ano ano bago mag christmas eve mismo. Hindi pa nakikita ng anak ko ang mother and sister in law ko, nang personal, kaya kahit masama sa loob ko, pumayag na ko pero hindi ako nangako na lahat ng mangyayari sa gabi na yon ay aayon sa kagustuhan niya. We went there and nameet ng anak ko yung mga pinsan niya from sis in law, pinakilala rin niya siya sa mga pinsan ni H, ate at mom niya, hindi ko maalis yung mata ko sa anak ko kung paano nila iwewelcome. Binigyan ng sobre ng mom in law ko yung anak ko, ampao, at pinagmano, samantalang yung sis in law ko naman ay walang kibo. Pinalipas ko yung gabi na yon at kating kati umalis, father in law ko lang at ilang mga pinsan niya ang nakakausap ko non. Hanggang sa, tahimik na naglalaro ang anak ko sa iPad niya, sinita ni mother in law ng “masama yan sa mata mo, hinahayaan ka lang ba ni mommy mo dyan?” Tiningnan ko yung Husband ko nang masama, sumagot naman siya agad ng “kahahawak lang ng iPad, may screen time yan na 30 minutes per umaga, tanghali, at gabi lang”. Binigay sakin ng anak ko yung iPad niya at tumabi sakin, sumagot yung mom niya ng “kahit na, hinahayaan niyo yung bata, lalabo mata nyan. kaya yata mahina e. para kayong mga..” hindi niya na tinuloy, wala nang sinabi yung asawa ko. Lumabas na ako, sinama ko yung anak ko at nagdrive ako pauwi. Iniwan ko yung asawa ko don sa sobrang inis ko kahit alam kong mali. Sinabihan raw akong bastos ng mama at ate niya, at mayabang na raw ako porke raw nakaangat ako ng konti sa buhay. Hindi man lang daw ako humingi ng sorry sa kanila kahit kailan at hindi man lang daw ako nag effort man lang na subukang makipag usap. Wala na lang talaga akong nasabi sa kakapalan ng mga mukha nila. After ng completion ceremony ng anak ko sa preparatory level, ipinost ko lahat ng achievements niya sa facebook, in public, from best in English and Math, to best in Art, Most Honest, Most Friendly, Most Inquisitive, Most Helpful, at yung award niya for being 2nd Honor in class wherein 16 sila.
Ngayon, nalaman namin na may sakit daw si mother in law at gustong makita ulit ang apo, ang tanging message niya lang kay H ay “gusto kong makita si son’s name”, walang sorry at walang anything, wala nang ibang sinabi. Now, ABYG for saying I won’t let my son see his grandmother sa father side, kahit mamatay pa siya?