Getting to grips with the game playing as Sardinia Piedmont and trying to make inroads into Africa. It's 1850 and I'm trying to make a protectorate out of Oro. I've researched quite a few military techs, probably about a third of my research so far has been for military techs.
I thought I'd have a massive tech advantage so wouldn't need to send too many battalions. First I sent 10, they got defeated easily, tried again with, 20, they also got defeated easily. Then I tried 30 and I've just tried 40. Defeated easily every time.
On the last attempt I think they took like 5K casualties out of their (and their allies) 50K men, whereas pretty much all of mine were either killed or wounded or otherwise put out of action. I should point out they had 1 ally who was also an African minor nation.
Is it because it's a naval invasion, is that specifically why I'm getting my arse handed to me every time? Or are uncivilised countries actually a lot tougher in this game than in Vicky 2?
Thought I'd steamroller them without issue but I've been humbled to say the least. Any advice would be appreciated.

I noticed this about maybe 30m-1h ago. I recently (2 days ago) got a sort of plugin (blackhole) that lets me record screen audio (or internal audio, idk) when recording the screen, and it was working for GarageBand until today. I took 2 recordings of me playing around with GB and, although I obviously heard the app in the moment, I couldn't any sounds coming from it in the recording. I don't think this is an issue with anything other than GB, cause I can hear audio from other apps (like Safari and Discord) in the recording, just not specifically GB. Is there a button somewhere in the app (not the monitoring button, I don't have that button) that does something to that?

So I wanted to just post about a NSV I had yesterday as I think sometimes we focus too much on numbers and neglect to congratulate ourselves on the change in our habits/lives. I work mostly from home and go into the office for meetings and training days, yesterday my team had a training day and had a “cake buffet” with 15-20 different types of cakes or bakes. Then then ordered dominos pizza on the company card. I took a lunchbox with red pepper hummus, chicken satay, cucumber, tomatoes and 100 calories of rice crackers.
I didn’t eat a single thing of theirs, despite multiple people trying to convince me and people even handing me a plate with food on to which I replied “thank you but I can’t eat it, I’m sure it’s all lovely and I don’t mean to offend anyone but I can’t eat cake anymore”. I have told them I’m losing weight for IVF and they knew that so didn’t question it too much.
But it felt really good! As someone who’s spent their whole life controlled by food and binge eating it felt like a real milestone to be able to say no and not for a second regret or question it.

I have no idea where to start let’s just try
I’ve always admired the femboy/trap lifestyle and the community’s a big part for me when got Facebook and I was allowed on it by my parents I’ve been a low-key part of a lot of the epic Memes and funny gay shit that’s come of it and I love it
I’m not a contributor, but I grew up enjoying it and when I turned 17, I officially started doing something and to be honest, I haven’t looked back but my process was growing out my hair I just didn’t feel comfortable and when I had my Facebook account hacked and I lost it, I kind of recoiled and became even more shy from doing a lot of stuff i did
I ended up moving house and focusing on a relationship and my job which took a good 6 years and when I finally came back, a lot of stuff has changed which is understandable…
but it so hard to find where I left off and I would like to find the traditional femboys my age that I grew up admiring so I can feel like I’m not old I’m not out of place and I can move forward with my own kind I’m moving to America soon and a lot of this stuff happens there so Id really like to have irl friends one day
I’m going to try and just start posting what I used to do again so if you’re reading this and you’re 26 and can relate to this somehow be cool hear from you
I know I’m talking to myself right now, but I’m too shy to post this anywhere else so I guess here is better than no where
Reddits scary for me but I’m not trying to be anonymous. I’m just trying to be honest…

English is not my first language so I use google translation. Please bear with me! 🙏🏼
I am a woman, 29, and have been in a lesbian relationship for three years. I am happy and secure with my girlfriend and our relationship, and we are soon getting married. I have never questioned my sexual orientation before or after meeting my girlfriend. Before her, I only dated guys, but when I met her, I just knew, She is my person.
We were friends for about 1.2 years and spent a lot of time together before I took the initiative to become more than friends. It wasn't easy at first, but because we had a strong friendship and knew each other well, we were able to build a stable relationship. Compared to my previous relationships where basic friendship and understanding or the desire to understand each other were lacking.
I have always had issues with guys, both in dating and friendship. Interests in my previous straight relationships started solely based on looks, and it really wasn't possible to just learn about them or hang out as friends, which never led anywhere. Stress and uncertainty in these relationships often made me feel like they were looking for something better. In some guy friend relationships, everything was cool until they got a girlfriend, and then it just went POOF in the air. 💔
Now I've started a new job where there's a guy who I initially found neutral, both in appearance and personality. I'm social and talk to EVERYONE at work, but I've noticed strange looks from colleagues when we interact. I didn't think much about it UNTIL during a shift when my colleagues moved him to my department three days in a row and seemed to expect a reaction from me when handing over information.

1. That made me start thinking more about him. There were no thoughts or feelings before this, so I'm not sure if I'm influenced by others. During the latest shift, I really felt a curious vibe and avoidant behavior between us. We avoided drawing attention, but I noticed that we often sought eye contact with each other.

We haven't really talked much, 2. which might be why I can't shake off the attraction and curiosity? Our conversations are always interesting and fun, even if they're about random things or work-related. I notice that we get looks when we're in the same room, so I try to keep it short and even avoid looking at him. We're both younger and good-looking compared to other colleagues, and we both seem aware of this and try to avoid drawing too much attention, even though we'd like to talk more (which we do as soon as there's no one nearby).
We work at a preschool, so I see how he interacts with the children and find him incredibly humble, which may contribute to the attraction. My confusion lies in not knowing if my attraction is 3. admiration for how good he is at his job, 4. if it's in a sexual way, or 5. if I find him interesting because of his calming energy, similar to that of my girlfriend. That's what got me interested in her.
I have ADHD and have struggled to understand and regulate my feelings on and off, and I'm not sure if this is something I need to confront or if I'm just influenced by my surroundings. I feel guilty and wonder if this is cheating on my girlfriend. Should I feel this way or not? Sooner or later, I will tell her everything because we have never kept anything secret from each other. I have been thinking, analyzing, and speculating about this for several days now. As I said before, I have never questioned my sexual orientation and have always found masculine women (like my girlfriend, who is androgynous) and humble men attractive when it comes to sexual attraction.
HOWEVER, one thing I have been thinking about for a long time since my twenties, when it comes to making friends of the opposite sex, it seems like we've been indoctrinated by norms and movies to believe that if two attractive individuals talk or hang out with each other or have chemistry, there "must be something romantic or sexual there". This frustrates me when I don't have that intuition?? And maybe that's one of the reasons why I don't have many guy friends. BUT I also get confused and conflicted when I find a guy interesting and maybe just want to be friends with him, as in this situation. That these norms haunt me. AND When it comes to making female friends, you don't get treated the same way by your surroundings.
I have never been attracted to a person solely because of their appearance, but it's the person's personality and our chemistry that determine whether relationships stick or not.
I would appreciate hearing what you think and feel about my situation. Has anyone experienced this before? If so, what did you do and how did it turn out?

I’ve been having Issues getting my ring to remain connected and to re-establish the connection. Now it appears to be malfunctioning and not working at all. Although it is connected and showing the battery percentage it isn’t giving any readings, just stating insufficient date, although it goes through the synch process. I can’t get a live reading either or see my stress levels. In fact nothing appears to be working properly. For several days the red LED would flash very briefly. Now the LED shines intensely and stays on for quite a long time. When placed on the charger the ring vibrates and buzzes violently. However the battery is hardly draining at all as none of the functions appear to be operational. I’ve repeatedly gone through all the procedures recommended, but without result. This ring was one of the slimmed down pro versions (not the new slim one) and was issued as a replacement for my first non-waterproof one that had battery problems. I’m hoping to be offered another replacement, but so far no response from Circular.

I haven’t posted on this website in a hot minute, but one of my 2 week old Welsummer chicks was killed two days ago when I had the flock outside to move around while it was sunny and warm. I was stupid and underestimated how quickly things would transpire during a restroom break before returning to supervise them. And in hindsight I should’ve taken a picture, but in any case when I found her she was disemboweled.
Her head was still present, and as far as I could tell most of her larger organs were present and uneaten. Her intestines though, were drawn out away from her body but still attached and in close proximity. The three other chicks in her ‘cohort’ of sorts were huddled and hiding under leafy weeds, with one of them so flat against the ground I thought she was paralyzed (it was ‘just’ shock).
Around the yard there’s recently been this crow being constantly harassed by 3 or so bluejays, and I’ve read that both can and will kill chicks if the situation suits them. Thing is, those birds usually appear content with the seeds, scrap and misc stuff in the yard, and they’ve never attacked the larger pullets I have even though they could probably pull it off. There may well be just some other predatory bird I’m not noticing, but so far I’m curious to see if anybody could match or validate the description of the murder to a likely culprit.

In Oasis it says that the expected date I will receive my award payment is May 19th. I just dropped my only course in the Summer A session and now I’m taking 2 courses in the Summer B session. Will I still receive my payment May 19th or will I receive it in the Summer B session?

Just went to que for a raid and it's saying "the user (some random players name) must advance to a higher level", I've done a few raids alresdy and it's been fine, I've tried to message the player that it shows but they are not online. I am also not ina group and don't know this player, have tried logging out, resetting battlenet/pc and nothing is working, anyone else having this happen or have any fix?

Hello everyone, i'm looking for a battery powered delay, preferably with true bypass or a very neuter buffer. I'm considering analog and digital as well. Looking in under 200e in the used market, but i consider spending even just 50e if it's a good choice. Also additional modulations are welcome if they're quality ones. Any suggestions?
Thank you!
Have a nice day

Hey Guys -
So recently joined the Westwood Gym with my spouse and went to a class today. Reached there 20 minutes before the class as i was told it gets very busy. Went to the Les Mills studio and saw everyone had their towels on each of the spot but people themselves were not there. I finally found a couple of spots together where there was nothing but a small tissue paper / paper towel on it. We didnt think much of it and assumed no one was using these spots and we put our stuff there. We stood around for 10-15 minutes waiting for the class to start and 5 minutes before class a woman comes in and says she had 'reserved' these spots by placing the tissue paper on the spots. So one spot was for her and other was for her friend (who wasnt physically even in the gym). By this time all other spots were taken up so we decided to leave the gym and go home as we had only came specifically for this class.
I'm pretty new to the gym and westwood in particular but found it quite strange that people can just leave tissue paper on their spot to 'reserve' their spots for the class? Is this normal Gym etiquette or am i right in being annoyed at this? Surely the gym should not allow other people to 'reserve' spots for someone else if they arent physically availble in the gym or even for themselves? Curious to hear other people's thoughts on this

First off I wanna say I can provide the receipt and pictures of the box for anyone who'll assume it's stolen as it's valid assumption to make.
So my sister just found her old iPad mini again and wants my help unlocking it even though she's reached the password attempts limit.
I've been using apple products long enough to know there's no way to keep the data without a backup but she sent me this which gave me a bit of hope, anyone know how I can recreate it at home? I live in a third world country and sending the iPad to the guy in the video isn't an option.

My husband’s company hosts a summit each year where thousands of employees from each region travel to the headquarters for a week. Post work hours is basically a frat party with him being in a male dominated career. Typically when we are apart during the work day or any reason we maintain communication throughout the day, shared texts, calls during lunch, etc. however from the moment he reached the airport to leave he went no contact. Radio silence. We share each other’s location and he’s been out at the bars each night until ~3am the entire week but hasn’t bothered to call and check in or say goodnight to his children. The second day he was gone our youngest came down with the stomach bug and it eventually escalated to all three of our children. Last night was the worst of it and I tried multiple times to contact him looking for emotional support and when he finally answered the phone he screamed at me and berated me for calling him, hung up and turned off his phone. He works hard, I’m so proud of him and he has every right to enjoy his week away and go out with his coworkers. I did not need, want, nor expect to communicate during work hours. But I certainly didn’t expect this either.

FTM, with a 7 week old boy, and were exploring our options.
Since birth till 4 weeks, i was breastfeeding to sleep. Around week 4, we introduced the paci, and baby was rejecting boob to sleep, and with my husband going to work, i felt really tired so we started falling asleep with the paci and rocking, and lullabies. Then my husband could also make baby fall asleep and help me out. It was hell, i don't know how other mamas do it, baby was constantly fighting sleep and crying, it was the worst, stressing me also, i was more tired of trying him to sleep than everything else.
Since monday, i decided i was going to breastfeeding to sleep again, and guess what no more crying or fighting to sleep, and falls asleep almost instantly (although still latching, at some point i unlacht him - usually after 20min cause he's in deep sleep 😂)
I tell you if you have the possibility and works for you, continue to brestfeed to sleep, it's the best thing ever. Don't listen to anyone saying it isn't sustainable, only you decide that.
People just like to talk shit about what they don't know Trust your gut.

So I haven't told him yet but for some background info she's I think 47 and I dunno how old he is. Me and my sister are the only children she has. She has miscarriaged multiple times including my older brother a few years before me.
I'm the oldest and sadly because of that I know EVERYTHING of her and all I can say is she needs therapy. Anyways about a month ago she said her period was late and she said she slept with him. He isn't the best person but that's for my own reasons mainly he cheats on her and she leaves it so technically she is in a polynomial relationship (I think that's what it's called) and he is always late.
A few minutes ago she called me and and asked if I have tampons and I said no because i just don't idk why. She said she was gonna sell the airfryer because she needs money to buy them because her pay is in a few weeks. I yelled at her saying that she should atleast tell him because he made her preggo and she said she doesn't want to. Her blood is dripping from her legs (her words not mine) and she doesn't have the money to go to the doctor. I just care to have basic human decency and tell him atleast

My partner and I have been off the pill, hoping to conceive for about a year and a half now.
In the last 6 months we’ve gone from hoping we’d get lucky to actually trying. This is what we’ve said to each other anyway.
Seemingly every time around my fertile window, according to the app it’s up to 7 days, we don’t have sex.
My partner’s work is always stressful, but it always seems to take its toll around my ovulation window. Either that or our time is preoccupied with seeing his family, something which does not make for romantic vibes.
I’ve asked him if he’s sure he wants to continue to try, to which he always says yes- next month he’ll be on it. But next month never happens.
I’m nearly 32 and worried that this is wasting my fertile years. I’m also going through a fertility clinic and numerous tests to figure out why we’re not getting pregnant; when the answer is (I think) that we’re not trying enough.
I’m really at a loss and feel like I’m going round in circles.

So... I need opinions on how to deal with this in a non confrontational way...
Our familis are quite... Old school in parenting. My husband and I are trying to do better. The other day we were on the phone with my husbands auntie and my daughter (2yo) tripped and hurt herself (not a lot, but enough for her to stop and start crying). Over the phone I hear his auntie say "don't cry. Don't be an ugly child for crying". That took me by surprise and I didn't reply, I was more worried about cuddling my daughter and making sure she was okay.
That said, if those sort of comments happen again, what's the best non confrontational way to deal with them and coach our families that that's quite a cruel thing to say to a baby.
(I have examples on my side as well, with my mom saying "you're a mean baby" because my daughter didn't do something she was asking)
Thank you all!

Honor Violence: And why nobody should demand respect

Honor violence is a sort of violence committed where the perpetrator's goal is to regain his tribe's honor, his family's honor, and his own honor. In most cases it’s planned by a family, and committed by one or more men of that family, to a woman of the family who has done or suspected to have done something against cultural or religious norms like rejecting an arranged marriage, or adopting a Western lifestyle. What's worse is that the family helps the perpetrators avoid justice by helping them flee the country. It’s a huge problem in Islamic communities[1], among others, and it’s something that doesn’t exist at all in so many other communities.
Now before I talk about the kind of thinking that is causing these behaviors, I want to clarify some things. First of all, Islam, at least according to the Quran, does not advocate honor violence. Second, honor violence is a tradition that existed in the deserts of today's Saudi Arabia long before Islam. Third, Arab Muslims spread Islam along with their traditions (including honor violence) to a huge proportion of the world (although, I don't doubt that other cultures already had the tradition of honor violence).
What kind of thinking causes a person to commit honor violence?
There are three flaws to discuss here. The main flaw is violent intolerance of dissenters -- the idea that it's best for a person to initiate violence on another person because he has dissenting ideas or actions. A second flaw is the idea that a person's social status is important and should be sought after and preserved. And a third flaw is that a person's social status should be, in any way, linked with his family's, and tribe's social status. An important thing to note here is that these flaws are connected. To clarify, I'm not talking about which flaw is more or less to blame for a person committing honor violence. What I'm talking about is that all of these flaws must be there, in order for a person to think it's best for him to commit honor violence (i.e. for him to want to commit honor violence).
The least bad of these flaws can be explained by answering the question, why do some people care about having respect from their peers? What's the point of it? What problem is it intended to solve? One way to approach this problem is to think about why some people get offended. Consider that when somebody perceives that he has been disrespected, he gets offended, and he may respond in a way to regain respect.
Fallibility and first impressions
One problem with thinking in terms of being respected, is that people are often wrong in their interpretations of other people’s actions and intentions. Often people perceive that they’ve been disrespected, when the person had no intention of disrespecting anybody. Most of the time it’s a case of jumping to conclusions. In other words, the person is not thinking terms of innocent until proven guilty. The thing is that we’re all fallible, meaning that it’s possible, and very common, that we are wrong about our ideas. But a lot of people are not familiar with the idea of checking for other possible interpretations and critically questioning them as a means of avoiding jumping to conclusions, as a means of finding the correct interpretation.
One common first interpretation that people make is that someone wants to hurt them, or to make them lose in some way. But this is a bad way to think about people’s actions because some people don’t want to hurt anyone or make anyone lose anything. So assuming that there is always malicious intent is a mistake because it ignores all the cases where there isn’t malicious intent. So it's not giving the person the benefit of the doubt.
This way of thinking, of always assuming that there is malicious intent, sees human interactions as win/lose. But this is a mistake. It’s entirely possible, and desirable, for human interactions to be win/win, for everybody to get what they want and nobody loses anything they want -- there is no law of nature preventing it from happening.[2] This is a special case of the idea that 'all problems are soluble'.[3]
So the better way to think about human interactions is that win/win situations are possible, where the people involved share the same primary goal of everybody winning, of everybody getting what they want. Now it is true that sometimes a person is trying to make you lose something, or otherwise hurt you, so it’s important to try to look out for this as a means of protecting yourself from harm.
One common misinterpretation people make is to treat a criticism of an idea or an action as a personal attack. But this is a mistake because a criticism is an explanation of a flaw in an idea, so criticizing the idea does not make the holder of the idea lose anything. In fact, criticism helps a person go from wrong to right. It helps him change his mind. It helps him find the truth, which is a great thing! So why perceive it as an attack? The person loses nothing. He only stands to gain (the truth!).
So consider a situation where you're presented with a criticism of your idea. If you agree with it, you stand to gain the truth, and if you disagree with it, you stand to lose nothing. So with criticism you have everything to gain and nothing to lose. So giving and receiving criticism is win/win.
Some common responses people make to criticism is to say "that hurts my feelings," "I'm offended by that," and "that's insulting!" These people respond in this way to communicate that the other person is wrong in some way. But that's not a valid argument -- it's not objective. A person's feelings can't be used as a standard for judging the truth. What's needed is an explanation, one that doesn't depend on a person's feelings. And on a related note, if your feelings are hurt by the truth, then what you can do is ignore the truth (not something I advise), or you can change your feelings about the truth. But what you shouldn't be doing is pressuring people to hide the truth.
Now some people mistake personal attacks for criticism. But calling somebody stupid because he believes an idea does not constitute a criticism. It’s not an explanation of a flaw in an idea. Instead it's an attack on the holder of the idea. And it’s designed for only one purpose, to hurt. People who make personal attacks instead of arguments see human interactions as win/lose. And this is where the idea of respect comes in. The personal attacks are about disrespecting the person. But why would anybody want to do that? What’s the point? What problem does it solve?
Truth-seeking vs Status-seeking
Something closely connected to the win/lose attitude is the status-seeking attitude. People with this attitude think in terms of people having social status, and getting more of it, or keeping the amount they currently have, is something they want. So if a person with the status-seeking attitude tries to disrespect another person, they perceive it as raising their own status while necessarily lowering the other person’s status, hence win/lose. The rest of us, who see human interaction as win/win, see the world in terms of truth. We are truth-seekers instead of status-seekers. We seek cooperative interactions instead of adversarial ones.
To get a better understanding of the difference between truth-seeking and status-seeking, let's consider how they differ in the way they work. Status-based thinking means judging ideas by figuring out how much status the ideas have. In contrast, truth-based thinking means judging ideas by their merit. As I explained in _Atheism: The faith of intellectuals?_, judging ideas by status means believing ideas by looking for confirmation, while judging by merit means believing ideas only after they have survived all known criticism.
As an example, imagine a guy hearing that somebody said something that he perceived as an insult to his parent, and he felt hurt by it. This means he's thinking with the status-seeking attitude instead of the truth-seeking attitude. So he is caring about having social status, and one extra flaw is that he thinks his social status is connected to the status of his parents. And so if he perceives that somebody has insulted his parent, he perceives this as a lowering of his parent’s status, which he also perceives as his own status being lowered. So he is hurt (feels disrespected) by this. He thinks that the "insulter" intentionally did it to try to hurt him, or otherwise make him lose something. But it's a mistake to make such an assumption because the "insulter" may have had no such intention -- maybe he was a truth-seeker not a status-seeker. The truth-seeking attitude does not cause this problem. A truth-seeker thinks like this: "Hmm. Somebody has said something bad about my mom. I wonder if the thing he said is truthful, or not. If it’s truthful, then my mom is bad, and I should talk to her about fixing her error so that she can improve, so I'm glad that he said it because it revealed an opportunity to improve, YAY!! And if it’s not truthful, then maybe this guy is a fool and I don't care what fools think, or maybe he's just mistaken so there's no reason to mind it because mistakes are common." So the truth-seeking attitude doesn’t produce the feeling of being insulted/disrespected. Only the status-seeking attitude does that.
The status-based attitude is one that is shared by many cultures. In gang culture, individuals each have an amount of status that they intend to keep. For this reason, if a gang member perceives that somebody has disrespected him, he sees this as his status being lowered while the other guy’s status being raised. And in an effort to regain his status, he may retaliate with physical violence. So here the gang member is committing two flaws -- demanding respect, and violent intolerance of dissenters.
There are lots of other examples of this. In tribal cultures, an individual’s status is partly determined by how much status his tribe has. For this reason, if a tribesman perceives that somebody has disrespected a member of his tribe, he sees this as his own status being lowered because he sees his tribe’s status being lowered. Now imagine a situation where somebody perceives that the king of his tribe (like Prophet Mohamed) has been disrespected. He would be very offended by this. And if he also has the violent-intolerant attitude too, and if the circumstances were opportune, then he would initiate violence in his misguided attempt to regain respect for his family, and by association, for himself.
Another example is honor violence within a family, or community. If a man thinks that his status is lowered if his daughter does something against his community’s religious norms, and if he also has the violent-intolerant attitude, then he may initiate violence if she commits such an act, as a means to preserve his family's status in the community, and by association, his own status. I should clarify that what usually happens is the family plans this together, where one person does the murder, and then the family helps him avoid the police, say by helping him leave the country.
What's interesting about the status-based idea is that it denies that respect should be earned. A person thinking like this may be in the wrong, and know it, and still demand to be treated as though he is in the right. Street thugs do it when they violently demand respect. Authoritative parents do it when they say 'Don't argue with me' to their kids. Some husbands do it when they expect their wives to side with them in social situations even when they are in the wrong. And some Muslim men do it when they commit honor violence.
The status-based attitude rears it’s ugly head in people’s politics too. These people align themselves politically by their tribal origin (status), rather than by their ideas (merit). It’s ugly because it’s not based on the truth, and because it means the person is unwilling to consider changing his mind about his politics -- because you can’t change your tribal origin. Judging ideas by status means that if you find out that you’re wrong, you’re going to deny it and claim that you’re right, and demand respect too. This way of thinking means no possibility of changing your political affiliation even if you were given devastating criticism of your political ideas. In contrast, judging ideas by merit means that you're willing to change your mind if you find out that you’re wrong. And this way of thinking means the possibility of changing your political affiliation.
Another way to describe the truth-seeking and status-seeking attitudes is like this. Truth-seeking means approaching problems as though the person does not yet have the truth, which is why he is seeking the truth. Status-seeking means approaching problems as though the person already has the truth, which is why he isn't seeking the truth, and instead he is seeking confirmation of what he already believes to be true. Note how the truth-seeking attitude accounts for the fact that it's possible one's ideas are in error, while the status-seeking attitude does not account for that fact. So somebody who is applying the status-seeking attitude is acting like he is infallible/omniscient. He's acting like he thinks he's God.
Rational people vs irrational people
Another way to describe the truth-seeking attitude is to describe the people who have it, rational people. As Elliot Temple explained [4]:

So a rational person sees criticism as win/win because it's part of his truth-seeking attitude. So when he gets criticism of his ideas, actions, or feelings, he doesn't interpret it as a personal attack (win/lose) and instead he tries to judge the criticism in order to try to extract value from it. He sees criticism as a good thing because he knows that criticism leads to further evolution of his knowledge. He sees criticism as necessary to improve himself, so he willingly seeks it out and enjoys thinking about it.
As I mentioned before, a common mistake people make is in how they interpret criticism of ideas. They see it as their person being criticized, rather than the idea alone being criticized. They misinterpret this because they consider some of their ideas to be static -- they are attached to them. They consider these ideas to be part of their identity -- something they refuse to even consider changing. And if you criticize one of these ideas they are attached to, since they consider that idea as part of their identify, they interpret your actions as an attack on their person. And in retaliation, they may call you out to be arrogant and condescending, or cuss you out, or initiate violence, as an attack back at you, in their misguided attempt at self-defense.
So the status-based attitude is what causes people to care about honor (i.e. social status). They have an intense desire for status, and it can pervade practically all of their thinking. Now in tribal cultures, another flaw they have aside from this status-seeking attitude, is that a person's social status should be linked to his family and tribe. And in some tribal cultures, especially the ones where Islam is dominant, they have a strong tradition linking their status with the women of their tribe. Now, combine this status-seeking attitude and these other flaws, together with the attitude that it's morally right to initiate violence in response to a dissenter, and what you have is somebody willing to commit honor violence (including honor killings) against his daughters, sisters, and other female members of his community, and on anybody who he perceives to be lowering his status/respect/honor.
On a final note, I should clarify something about the relationship between the individual and the community. It is true that a man who commits honor violence is being pressured by his family to commit the violence as a means of preserving their social status, but whether or not he acts on that pressure, or even feels that pressure, depends on his ideas. Will he care what his family and community thinks? Well, in those communities a lot of the opportunities for a man, like getting married or having a good job, depends on the status of his family and his tribe. So if a woman taints his family's status, and if he doesn't remove that taint by killing her, then he'll lose those opportunities. But so what? He could forego all of those "opportunities" by fleeing the country with his daughter. If he doesn't do that, it's because of his evil ideas. Pressure from society is not a defense! Individuals are responsible for their actions regardless of the "pressures" from their communities.
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[1] _Honor Killings Go Beyond Mere Homocide_, by Ayaan Hirsi Ali. Also see The AHA Foundation on Honor Violence.
[2] See _The Beginning of Infinity_, Chapter 9: Optimism, by David Deutsch.
[3] See _All problems are soluble_, by Elliot Temple. Also see [2].
[4] _Rational People_, by Elliot Temple.
^{Originally published in 2014}