How to make a present on the keyboard

One thing seemingly unites millennials and Gen Z with respect to their socioeconomic political outlook. That is the younger generation’s consistent trend towards socialist policies. Many younger people today would agree that higher taxes, more government services, a universal income, more regulatory agencies, and debt forgiveness are ideal policies. However, these policies would all need to be carefully administered by a federal bureaucracy already criticized for being bloated and corrupt. Curious then why a society so distrustful of government is demanding that government secure more money and gain more authority to regulate the economy.
The reason for this apparent dissonance is the fact that many, if not most, young people have absolutely no clue about how finance actually works. Federally funded education has failed many generations of students and is a good example of why government programs are inherently bad. Taxpayer funded programs are inherently flawed because there is no private mechanism to ensure success; all public programs are run by people who don’t want to lose their jobs. There is fundamentally no incentive for a public program to solve the problem it was mandated to solve.
Rather, all public programs, including education, are incentivized to follow this cycle: (1) perpetuate low level crises in order to justify the existence of the institution, (2) solve some aspect of the problem, to justify the continued appointment of present leadership, (3) lobby for increased funding to solve the problem during an election/voting cycle, (4) fail to solve the problem while still using limitless tax dollars, (5) repeat. The department of education, along with all other institutions, follow this model. There may be Boy Scouts who work for the government who truly want their agency/department to eventually be shuttered or streamlined due to the unparalleled efficiency, competence, and efficacy of their work. But most bureaucrats simply want to keep their jobs forever.
All this to say that socialist policies which require government oversight are fool’s errands on their face because no public administration can avoid corruption due to the nature of public institutions. Private institutions, which are bound by market forces, may be corrupt, but if there is sufficient competition then corruption is literally impossible. Free, capitalist markets with sufficient competition cannot be corrupt simply because any inefficient allocation of capital via corruption will undermine the company’s ability to compete among other enterprises that dont waste money/resources this way. Obviously reality is more nuanced, but this law is essentially true, also public institutions don’t compete with private ones because public institutions are often funded with infinite public dollars and therefore don’t rely on the “rational consumer.”
The rational consumer is integral to this entire scenario I’m describing. Free market competition cannot exist without a rational consumer who ensures that this competition exists by making reasonable choices about how he spends his hard-earned money. While most economists, have always agreed that the “rational consumer” is a figment of our collective imagination, the premise has always been broadly assumed. The assumption is that people are generally wise enough to understand how finances and market forces work and allocate their money accordingly.
This could not be further from the truth. Scores of youth are suckered by tiktok and YouTube gurus who lie about financial topics to desperate people in to get ad revenue. The youth today are seeing their American dream collapse, in part because most young people graduate high school without even an iota of an understanding about what a “premium” is or how “interest” actually works. People don’t know the difference between a stock and a bond, or that a “401k” doesn’t mean $401,000.
This ignorance of basic economics causes the world’s largest consumer economy, the US, economy to behave monstrously inefficiently because few sectors are competitive and populated by rational consumers. Rather, most markets consist of fools with borrowed money, and corrupt, colluding companies willing to leech and fleece children and adults alike. In turn, this inherent market failure caused by a failed education system, produces a bastardized economy which creates appalling wealth inequality and public hatred of “capitalism” as a concept.
Thus, most young people who are NOT rational economic actors have a tendency to distrust capitalism despite not understanding how finance or “capital” actually works, and therefore they favor socialism or even communism as an answer to a failed economic system despite the fact that public institutions have for more opportunities to be corrupt than competitively private ones do. So you can mark my words, the youth in America will succeed in pushing the US towards socialism, ON BOTH SIDES, because very few people actually understand how finance works yet are enraged by the current order, so the political left and right support candidates who lobby for sweeping political control over the economy.
TL;DR: the DoE has failed several generations and the entire system of American capitalism by not ensuring that graduates understand basic macro/micro economic terms along with personal finance because capitalism requires rational consumers/actors to maintain efficiency yet the average consumer is constantly fleeced out of their money by corporations who are far more sophisticated than zoomer who doesn’t know how compound interest works.

This is getting beyond absurd, almost comical. I moved out over a month ago, none of extended family members know, as they pretty much perceive me as some backround character, not an actual person, so they are not much involved in my life. But since my grandpa visits every weekend, my mom finally told him, when I decided, that Im tired of acting like nothing has changed, cause I insisted that she won´t tell him. He behaves as if I was some character frozen in time, that does not exist outside of his limited perception, he is extremely close minded person, dogmatic, he sees the youngest grandchild in me (Im not even youngest, but Im a woman, so he perceives my 10 years younger boy cousin as more mature somehow). They, together with my grandma that passed away some time ago, were never able to see me as an actual person.
I avoid him ever since I can, now that I do not pretend anymore, I always leave when I know he will visit. I am often at my parents house, as my dog still lives there, cause I could not have her in my apartment, and she is my best friend and partner in crime, we used to sleep together in my bed, so I try to be there for her as much as is needed, so she won´t feel like I left her. I come and feed her everyday. So today I slept at parents house with my dog, I love our time together. I left in the morning before grandpa´s visit.
There is some problem with water in our apartment building, the water does not run, so I came back to my parents house later in the afternoon and my mom said: "Grandpa is constantly asking where you are, he cannot wrap his head around you, not being here." Guys Im 31, 31 years old! My mom was like, "I have to explain it to him all the time!" I dont get it, I dont even like him, he always talked AT me, not TO me, he does not see me existing outside of this character, that he sees, and that is always somehow present, when he comes.
I never even interacted with him, cause he would always say things, that would trigger me as hell, so I always did the obligatory greeting and ran away from him either to my room or garden, simply avoiding him at all costs and especially one on one interaction, I would be anxious about what will come out of him, once I saw, he focused his sight on me, I would quickly disappear somewhere, before he could start something.
The same goes for my aunt. She is incredibly toxic person, incredibly invasive, scanning you all the time etc. She does not know yet about me moving out, cause they visit once in few months, however like 3 weeks ago, she showed up without announcing, I came from my apartment to feed my dog and there she was, and managed to put me down during my obligatory greeting thing. Even her question "What´s new" had this condescending tone, suggesting, that I do nothing in my life, so there was really no space, to share my moving out thing (I dont even want to really). Since she saw me being there and returning from somewhere, she did not find it any different than ever.
She insists on my presence constantly! We used to go to their place with my parents just as we did as kids up to few years ago, when she offended me so much, that I decided, that this has to stop and stopped visiting her and uncle with my parents and brother for good. My brother still goes there with them. And when they visit my parents, she always demands me, like "Where is she?!", "I dont even see her anymore!", "Why did she went to her room and was with us for such a short time?" Again, Im 31, other people have been living on their own for years, her son has been living in another country most of his life, but when it comes to us, especially me, she demands me, to be sitting there with them, as they were used to when I was little (even back then I was not present all the time). Im not even sure this was happening to such an extent when I was younger, it got definitely worse the older I got. She is not as focused on my brother, never insists on his presence. She is like a vampire, that wants to suck me, and sees me as her supply.
It does not help, that I am the first one, who moved out from my "closest" family, my brother still lives at home, all cousins too, and they are ages between 20-40. I have always been the black sheep, so it makes sense. But it´s crazy, how they ignore my age and act, like I did something abnormal...I had more freedom when I was a teen or in my 20´s, as this was not happening to such an extent, neither with aunt, neither with grandpa...

With the recent Gwimbly episode out, I decided to review one of the classic platformers to see the light of Sun in the mid 90's. Everyone remembers the legacy of this game, but boy oh boy, nostalgia glasses sure compensate for some of the glaring issues that plague this title.
Precedents and Development:
"The magic Adventures of Gwimbly in Corn Land" is one of those Megadrive publicity games, such as M&Ms or The Noid video-game, this time from the Monsanto company. And the least said about this, the better. Left-to-right side scrolling, awful controls, repetitive and boring, it was deemed to be a forgotten artifact. But, by good fortune, it was one of the (allegedly) two games that series albanian creator Petulla Pulle had as a kid.
Petulla deserves an aside. Learning to code intuitively and implementing Risk on his Casio FX-81 at the age of 6, he is not the poor boy that media wanted us to belive. Coming from a well off family, when he arrived in the US he co-created Sweet Games (now Insane Groundbreaking Games) with his friend Zachary Taylor, and they started development on Gwimbly after acquiring the Licence from a gambling bet in a pub in New York. Although his reputation being ripped apart now by the abuse accusations and toxic working enviroment, Pulle was a popular figure among gamers in the late 90's and 00's, and his advancements in the field should be recognised.
So, basically a one man job, Gwimbly finished its development in just under 2 years and came out for the PSX in August 1996, just one month before Mario 64, which eclipsed the relevance of the first game in sales. Even so, it was the alternative for the Sony owners at the time looking for a collectathon platformer in the, then, new 3rd dimension. But growing pains show all over the game, as we'll see.
Graphics:
While not being bad, a lot of the 5th generation of consoles problems are present. Textures warp and wabble, popping is noticible even in small areas, and glitches are all over the place, specially after acquiring the triple jump.
What, then, has made that Gwimbly sticks to our memories? The character designs and animations, of course. All of them, from the little Cheddar Gobblin enemies of the first level until Count Groxya, without forgetting Mr. Millipede. Even little details, like Gwimbly's iddle animations, reflect care and dedication (unlike its sequels, but we'll talk about that later).
Sound and FX:
This must be the aspect of the game that stincks the most. The constant crackling and stuttering stuck into my ears as a kid, and it certainly has not gotten better as an adult. The howling made for some funny misunderstandings (the classic line "If I had my Gwimbly gun" was supposed to say "If I had some Sweet Corn", but it made for a good meme in the episode), but it was not good even for that time. And, worst of all, while not being at Gex levels, the constant repetition of lines and screams from Gwimbly got annoying real quick.
Music is nothing to write home about. The Corn Hills theme was catchy, but after the 100th time you got tired of it. The use of Theremin and Erhu instruments was more innovative than effective in the latter levels. Only the Menu Music has had some lasting effects, even musically referenced in the Celeste Soundtrack.
Gameplay:
Gwimbly is a short game, and I think that's a positive. With only 50 Corn Cans to collect, with four main levels, a central Hub and the last Can Count Castle, it didn't worn out its welcome with its 8-10 hour average run.
Nowadays, Gwimbly feels cluncky to control. The comitment you had to endure with some of the jumps is incredible, and the run and jump distance seems inconsistent. But, worst offender of all, the camera was not good. And who ever thought that recentering the camera with the X button was a good idea.
Levels:
- Silly-corn Valley: Everybody remembers the central Hub and tutorial level. Mr Millipede serves as our side kick, and the one who teach us how to jump, roll and make the Gwimbly Stimbly, all while staring us with his glassy eyes. You could skip its advices, and if you did not talk to him once it was recognised in the access to the final level, where he would ask you who you were.
- Icy Corn Flakes: a little fun snow level, the developers made the wise decission to not have icey controls (EDIT: it seems that it was programmed into the level, but it was badly implemented so you walked normally). The 10 Corn Cans here are not very difficult, and the Uni-Corn boss was cute.
- Corncob swamp: The swim level. Enough said.
- The Corn Maze: I still have nightmares from this level. Not by the theming or "spooky" music, but from the level design. The constant back-tracking, the Ghosts of Cornstmass Past and specially the, not one, but 2 Corn Cans that made you speedrun the maze almost made me quit the game more than once. In the second run of the maze, Pulle admitted that he put the least amount of time possible WITHOUT CONSIDERING the animation of the door opening, so it was literally no possible to get it unless you glitched through the invisible wall at the beginning.
- Corn Field of Lava: the amazing thing about this level is that, after activating the volcanoe, the entire level was transformed and filled with pop-corn. Be sure to grab the Can at the beginning of the level, after the jumping rocks, because it will not be possible to grab it after the level remodelling (probably by mistake).
- Can Count Castle: I wish I could say the best was reserved for last, but the tight platforming of this level was a frustration factory from start to finish. The only positive is the Final Boss, and the secret animation if you collected all Corn Cans (and the reason why it was made a PG 13+).
Conclusion and Legacy:
Gwimbly in its original state is a game that lives best in our memories, rather than our current consoles. Luckily, its amazing fandom has corrected many of the graphical glitches and performance issues via patches and ROMs that enhance the expirience. But the level design, even with its good moments, is not something you can easily fix.
The inmediate sequel (Gwimbly 2 on Corny Land // Gwimbly 2: The Adventure of Gwimble and Millipede in PAL regions), that came out just a year after the 1rst game release, pullished some aspects of the original while inexplicably substracting from others. The most glaring example is the introduction of fall damage.
Gwimbly 3 Revengance, which came out in late 2003, was a terrible disappointment. It mutted the sparckly colors of the first two entries, and the introduction of Gwimbly Guns and the absence of Mr.Millipede (who was going through some stuff at the time) left a sour taste for the fans of the franchise for what was its final entry. The development hell that Gwimbly 4 went through, and the aforementioned Pulle accusations, put Gwimbly in a weird spot for the next 15 years.
Let's just hope Insane Groundbreaking Games make something with the face of the company. I do not want a fighting game from Gwimbly. I want a new platformer, and, if one can dream, the first truly good game of the saga.

{UPDATED} Rare Heirloom Cannabis Seeds for Sale - NY
Hey everyone! I was pleased by the overwhelming interest I got in my collection, as someone who has a passion for building soil and hunting beans for unique phenos the last 15 years. I am glad how many people appreciate true one of kind heirloom genetics!
Why am I getting rid of them? Simply put - I am trying to go the legit route and this state is making it beyond difficult. I need to recoup and regroup. Any support is much appreciated. I’ve waited my whole life for this.
Pricing - I updated below. Much of my collection is very hard to find one of kind stuff that is highly sought after. No random pollen chucking, true bred stabilized genomes. There’s a lot of history in that list as well if you’re someone who understands the genomics of the plant. You’ll see breeder, where they’re out of, the strain name, the cross and a little bit of history / description on some of it. Some very very special stuff. Pricing is either what I paid for it or a little more if it’s something special that’s not easy to find or not being bred anymore.
*Each strain is in original packaging stored in a curidor at a steady 52 degrees, no light, no humidity. I find this is the best way to store beans for long term storage and guaranteed high germination rates. I usually get 97-100% germ rate with my germination method which I will include on a printed out sheet for anyone who grabs any of my offerings. I want you to succeed and find something special - I cherish my collection and sad to see a lot of it go but you gotta do what you gotta do. I’d really like to see this stuff go to growers who care about the plant and preserving the uniqueness to it for years to come. Hope all of this helps
Here is the full list:
coasttocoastgenetics@gmail.com (get in touch)
{Regs}

~ Oni Seed Co (Maine) ~ 

Tropicanna Cookies F2 - Girl Scout Cookies x Tangie (multiple award winner) [R] 250 ~ Elev8 Seeds (Seattle, Washington) Tangerine Cookies - Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookies x Tangie [R] 120

~ Mountain Organics ~ 

Cosmic Lotus - Gonzo x TOVR (Thai, Afghan, Haze, Northern Lights) [R] 120 Maya - Acapulco Gold x Lotus [R] 120 Gold Rush - Colombian Gold x Lotus [R] 120 The One BC1 - 1976 Highland Thai x 1971 Kandahar Afghani [R] {Clackamus Coot} 150 {See Mountain Organics Genetics PDF (now MOB seeds) for more info on genetic lineages.} ~ MOB seeds (Mountain Organics) ~ Psyche - The One BC1 x The One BC1 (Afghani Hybrid) [R] 120 Eros - The One BC1 x The One BC1 (Thai Hybrid) [R] 120 The One BC2 - The One x The One BC1 [R] 120 Morpho (Blue Lotus F2) - Blue Gonzo x Lotus [R] 120 Blue Gonzo BC1 - Blue Gonzo x Blue Lotus [R] 120 {Blue Gonzo - The One x (Nevilles Haze x NL5) (blue pheno)}

~ Symbiotic Genetics / The Village (Sacramento, California) ~ 

Mimosa - Clementine x Purple Punch F2 [R] (multiple award winner) 200 Banana Punch - Banana OG x Purple Punch F2 [R] 200 Cherry Punch - Cherry AK47 x Purple Punch F2 [R] 200 Wedding Crashers - Wedding Cake x Purple Punch F2 [R] 200 Orangeade - Tangie x Purple Punch F2 [R] 200 Big Block - Motorbreath 15 x Purple Punch F2 [R] 200 {Purple Punch lineage - Larry OG x Granddaddy Purple}

~ Exotic Genetix - EG Mike (Washington) ~ 

{Over 50x Cannabis Cup Awards since 2008} Tina F2 - (Tina x Tina) Constantine x Triple OG [R] (multiple award winner) 200 Paradise Circus - Tropicanna Cookies x Tina [R] 200 Cookies & Creme - Mystery Cookies x Starfighter F2 [R] (multiple award winner) 250 Big Smooth - OG Blueberry x Cookies & Creme [R] 200 Scoops - (Gelato x Tina) x Cookies & Creme F2 [R] 200 Strawberries & Creme F2 - Strawberry x Cookies & Creme F2 [R] 250

~ Dying Breed Seeds - Shiloh Massive (Mendocino, California) ~ 

California Black Rozé - Rozé x OG eddy [R] 350 Red Rozé - Rozé x Adonai [R] 350 Sour Zkittlez - Zkittlez x Candy Zkittlez #3 x Adonai [R] 400 Watermelon Zkittlez - Watermelon Zum Zum #3 x OG Eddy [R] 400 {Zkittlez - Grape Ape x Grapefruit} {Adonai - (Russian Kush (LA Cut) x Silver Tooth (Super Silver Haze x Train Wreck)) x Sweet Tooth}

~ Humboldt Seed Company (Humboldt County, California) ~ 

Blueberry Muffin F5 - Purple Panty Dropper x Razzle Berry [R] 100 Purple Mountain Majesty F3 - Purple Train Wreck x Train Wreck x Blueberry Muffin [R] 100 Amethyst F3 - Purple Panty Dropper x Blueberry Muffin [R] 100 Mango Sherbert F3 - Mango Trees x Mango Kush x Sherbert [R] 100 {2018/2019 HSC Phenotype mega hunt - Best 0.1% selected out of 10k plants} Mango Trees F5 - Mango Kush x Humboldt OG x Jack Herer [R] 100 Banana Mango F3 - Mango Trees x Banana OG x Blueberry Muffin [R] 100 Magic Melon F3 - Mango Trees x Honeydew Melon x Mango Sherbert [R] 100 Pineapple Upside Down Cake F3 - PUDC BX3 x Pineapple Train Wreck x Cookie Monster [R] 100 {2019/2020 HSC Phenotype mega hunt - Best 0.1% selected out of 10k plants} Very Cherry - Old Timer Seed x Lemon Kush Bx3 [R] 100 Vanilla Frosting - Humboldt Frost OG x Humboldt Gelato Bx3 [R] 100

~ Gage Green Group (Detroit, Michigan) ~ 

Grateful Breath F2 - OGKB (OG Kush Breath) x Joseph OG [R] 400 5th Dimension - Out Of Body Experience x Synchronicity [R] 300 Guiding Light - Out Of Body Experience x Breathwork [R] 300 Luna Golden - High School Sweetheart 2 x Synchronicity [R] 300 Mo Lune Day - Motorbreath 15 x Breathwork [R] 300 {Out of Body Experience - (Skywalker OG x Grateful Breath) x Grateful Breath F2} {Synchronicity - Irene x Grateful Breath} {Breathwork - Mendobreath x Grateful Breath} {High School Sweet Heart - Cherry Pie Kush x Grateful Breath}

~ Dominion Seed Co - Duke Diamond (Virginia) ~ 

Stash Plant - The Puck (Skelly Hashplant) x Screaming Eagle [R] 140 Munson - Northern Lights #5 x Screaming Eagle [R] 140 Kough Drop - Strawberry Afghani x Screaming Eagle [R] 140 Free Bird - Headband x Screaming Eagle [R] 140 Shine Apple - Virginia Beach Afghani x Screaming Eagle [R] 140 Pine Bomb - Sensi Durban Poison x Screaming Eagle [R] 140 {Screaming Eagle lineage - Airborne g13 x (88 g13 Hashplant x Kandahar Afghani)} Granny Skunk - Virginia Beach Afghani x (Skelly Hashplant x SSSC Skunk #1) [R] 200 Local Skunk - Original Diesel x (Cuddlefish HP x Sour Diesel IBL) x (Skelly Hashplant x SSSC Skunk1) [R] 200 Sis Skunk - Chem Sister x (Skelly Hashplant x SSSC Skunk1) [R] 200

~ Lucky Dog Seed Co - SkunkVA (Virginia) ~ 

{Holder, Preserver, Sharer of the most elite / influential Chemdog cuts in existence.} Dog Patch - Chemdog 91 Bx2 x Chemdog D [R] 150 Hunza Valley 91 - Skelly Hashplant x Chemdog 91 Bx3 [R] 150 Road D.O.G. - Crossroad Chem x Chemdog 91 Bx2 [R] 150 Chem Fuego - Sour Band (Sour Diesel x Headband) x Chemdog 91 Bx3 [R] 150 Double Krush - Chem Krush x Chemdog 91 Bx2 [R] 150 Guerilla Fume - Silver Chem (Silverback OG x Chemdog 91) x Chemdog 91 Bx3 [R] 150 Bohemian Highway - Occidental Kush x Chemdog 91 Bx3 [R] 150 SkunkVA Chemdog 91 S1 - Chemdog 91 x Chemdog 91 [F] {Crossroad Chem - Chemdog 91 x SFV OG Kush Bx2 (Chem pheno)} {Chem Krush - Chemdog 91 x SFV OG Kush Bx2 (Kush pheno)} {Chemdog 91 lineage - Nepalese x Thai Landraces} Chemdog 91 is considered to be “the godfather” in cannabis genetics and has paved the way for some of the most popular strains in history such as Sour Diesel and OG Kush. Chemdog lineage can be found in most modern day hybrid genetics and these crosses are from there original seed stock - Original Skunk VA Chemdog 91 S1 gifted to me by Headies Gardens. Friend & Distributor of Skunk VA genetics Lucky Dog Seed Co.}

~ Green Bodhi (Eugene, Oregon) ~ 

{Intentional Horticultural ~ Mexican ~ Thai ~ Afghani} Hazy Kush - Hazy Kush x Hazy Kush Bx2 [R] (extremely unique genotype in Phylos Galaxy) 120 Hazy Dog - Dog Walker OG x Hazy Kush Bx2 [R] 120 Hazy Star - Stardawg x Hazy Kush Bx2 [R] 120 Hazy Sour - Sour OG x Hazy Kush Bx2 [R] 120 Hazy OG - OG Kush x Hazy Kush Bx2 [R] 120 Hazy Ghost - Ghost OG x Hazy Kush Bx2 [R] 120 Sour 78 (Tenzin Kush) - Sour OG x 78 LA Affie OG [R] (extremely unique genotype) 200 Dog Walker 78 - Dog Walker OG x (Sour OG x 78 LA Affie OG) [R] 150 Kosher 78 - Kosher Kush x (Sour OG x 78 LA Affie OG) [R] 150 SBSE 78 - Sour Best Shit Ever x (Sour OG x 78 LA Affie OG) [R] 150 Ancient Tenzin #2 - Tenzin Kush #2 x Ancient OG (72 Iranian x Snow Lotus) [R] 200 Ancient Tenzin #4 - Tenzin Kush #4 x Ancient OG (72 Iranian x Snow Lotus) [R] 200 {Hazy Kush lineage - Golden Pineapple x ((Trainwreck x Purple Affie) x (OG Kush x SAGE))}

~ Old World Genetics - DJ Short (Eugene, Oregon) ~ 

Newberry F5 - Blue Heaven F4 x DJ Short Blueberry F4 Male [R] 300 Velvet Krush F5 - FXW #4 Mother x DJ Short Blueberry F4 Male [R] 300 Blueberry F5 - Highland Thai x Afghani Indica [R] (first place indica cannabis cup 2000) 150 {Blueberry seeds are F4-F5 selectively bred from pure Landrace P1s since the 1970s. The mother for DJ Shorts Blueberry is over 20 years old - Selected in 1998 and rereleased in 2004.}

~ Dynasty Genetics - Professor P (Portland, Oregon) ~ 

Oregon Huckleberry IBL - Oregon Huckleberry F4 x Oregon Huckleberry Bx3 [R] 150 Mt. Hood Huckleberry F4 - Mt. Hood Huckleberry F3 x Mt. Hood Huckleberry F3 [R] 150 Huckleberry Kush V5 - Oregon Afghani x Oregon Huckleberry [R] 150 Crater Lake V6 - Super Silver Haze F2 x Oregon Huckleberry [R] 120 Alpenglow - Cherry Vanilla Cookies x Oregon Huckleberry 2017 #5 [R] 120 Blue Magoo Bx2 - Blue Magoo x Blue Heron #111 [R] 120 Salmon River OG - Pre 98 Bubba x Blue Heron #111 [R] 120 Birds Of Paradise - Kali Snapple x Blue Heron #111 [R] 120 Starduster - Pre-99 East Coast Sour Diesel x Ms. Universe (clone) [R] 120 {Kali Snapple - (Snowbud x Pineapple) x Kali Mist (Pre 2000)} {Ms. Universe - Dess*tar (Starship x Kali Mist) Mother x Space Queen F3 Farther} {Oregon Huckleberry - Oregon Blueberry (Blueberry X Temple Flo) X Morning Glory (Hawaiian x Afghani x Shiva Skunk)} {Blue Magoo - Oregon Blueberry F4 x Williams Wonder F2} {Blue Heron - Blue Magoo x Blue Magoo / Huckleberry}

~ Relic Seeds - Professor P (Portland, Oregon) ~ 

{Preservation of Rare Heirloom ~ Landrace ~ Unique CBD Varieties} Relic Grapefruit - Grapefruit IBL x Grapefruit F2 [R] 140 Durban Grapefruit - Durban Poison x Grapefruit F2 [R] 140

~ Massive Seeds (Rogue Valley Terroir, Southern Oregon) ~ 

{Bred, Grown and Harvested outdoor at 42.0 Latitude (Same Latitude as mid Hudson Valley) Some of the largest growing / biggest yielding plants on record with massive uniform nugs.} Pineapple Pomegranate F3 - Pomegranate x Applegate Hornblower [R] 140 Durban Pomegranate F2 - Durban Poison x Pineapple Pomegranate F3 [R] 140 Black Pomegranate - Pineapple Pomegranate F3 x South African Landrace [R] 140 Rogue Valley Wreck - Big Wreck x Blueberry Snow [R] 120 Summer Sunset OG - Purple Hindu Kush x Lemon Larry OG [R] 120 Mint Sunset - Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookies x Summer Sunset OG [R] 120 Purple Lemon Chem - Chem 91 x Summer Sunset OG [R] 120 Snow Skunk - Yuki Dog x Purple Lemon Chem [R] 120 Chem541 - Chem91 Bx1 x (Chem91 x Session Sour Diesel BX1) [R] 120 {Pomegranate - Shishkaberry x Blueberry x Oregon Snow x Lemon Pineapple} {Applegate Hornblower (Pineapple Trainwreck) - Mexican x Thai x Afghani}

~ Freeborn Selections - Mene Gene (Mendacino, California) ~ 

Piña F4 - Super Silver Haze x ((Dirt x Bigbud) x (Dirt x Purp) [R] 300 Sky Cuddler Kush F3 - PK x (Skywalker OG x (PK x (Hindu x Big Red) [R] 300 Lime Pop Kush F3 - OG x (PK x Black Lime) [R] 300 Cherry West Bx - Cherry West x (Cherry West x Cherry Limeade) [R] 300 {Thoroughly worked lines over at least 3-4 generations before released to the public.} {(Dirt x Bigbud) x (Dirt x Purp) and (Big Red) are 80s Afghani lines from Santa Cruz.} Black Lime Reserve F2 {Eclectic Elegance Preservation} - Northern Lights x Purple Kush x Chemdog Special Reserve [R]

~ Emerald Mountain Legacy - Mandelbrot Brothers Family Heirlooms {Ras Truth} ~ 

Royal Kush IX (Bx10) - (Sour Diesel x Highland Afghani) x Southern Humboldt Purple Kush [R] 350 Oil Spill (Bx5) - XXX OG x Royal Kush 7 [R] 300 Royal Spill - (XXX OG x Royal Kush 7) x Royal Kush 8 [R] 300 The Real Rozé - (Zkittlez x Royal Kush 7) x Royal Kush 8 [R] 300 Royal Limez - (Zkittlez x Black Lime Reserve) x Royal Kush 8 [R] 300 Royal Maui Berry - Diesel Maui Dawg x Blackberry Kush x Royal Kush 9 [R] 250 {Royal Kush genome is one of the most sought after stabilized / homogenized IBLs in existence from the heart of the Emerald Triangle in Northern California.}

~ Karma Genetics (Holland) ~ 

Biker Kush (Ha-OG Bx2) - Ha OG x Biker Kush V1 [R] 150 Sour Power OG - Sour Power (cup winning cut) x Biker Kush V1 [R] 150 Tha Melon - Melon x Biker Kush V1 [R] 150 Karma Sour Diesel Bx2 - Rez Sour D x (Rez Sour D x (Rez Sour D x Biker Kush v2)) [R] 350 Headbanger - Rez Sour D (KG cut) x Biker Kush V1 [R] {2013 Amsterdam Cannabis Cup 1st} 300 Josh D OG - SFV OG x Triangle Kush x Hells Angels OG [R] 300 {Real OG Kush Story - Josh D & Matt “Bubba” Berger began developing these genetics in Orlando, Florida back in 1991.} {Biker Kush v2 - Ha OG x (Ha OG x (Ha OG x SFV OG Bx2))} (cup winning genetics) {Sour Power - Starbud x East Coast Sour Diesel} (cup winning genetics) {Sour Diesel used in Karma Sour crosses is a KG cut of a Rez Sour D IBL selected in 2007}

~ Surfr Seeds (Pacific Northwest) 

Citrus Tsunami - Tropicana Cookies x Orange Zkittlez [R] 100 Island Zkittlez - Sour Strawberry x Orange Zkittlez [R] 100 North Shore - Mendo Purps x Orange Zkittlez [R] 100 Endless Summer - Purple Punch x Orange Zkittlez [R] 100 So Pitted - MAC1 x Orange Zkittlez [R] 100

~ Pacific North West Roots - Ras Kaya Paul (Washington) ~ 

Koffee F5 - Alien OG x Alien Kush {Rare Pacific Northwest Roots Hierloom IBL} [R] 300 Black Koffee - Black Dog Kush Bx4 x Koffee F5 [R] 300 Koffee & Donuts - Glazed Cherries F4 x Koffee F5 [R] 300

~ Green Source Gardens (Southern Oregon Heirlooms) ~ 

Pinkleberry Kush F5 {Mendacino Blackberry Kush Hierloom IBL} [R]

~ HBK Genetics ~ 

Chile Verde - Key Lime Pie x Lavender [R] 300 {Emerald Cup 2018 Winner - Best Personal Use} {Key Lime Pie - Durban Poison x Cherry OG x OG Kush} {Lavender - Super Skunk x Big Skunk Korean x Afghani Hawaiian}

~ Alien Genetics ~ 

Sour Apple IX (IBL) - Sour Apple IBL x Sour Apple IBL [R] 350

~ Mos_Cutty ~ 

Cherry AK 47 IBL (Original Serious Seeds stock) 250 {AK47 - Colombian x Mexican x Thai x Afghani} [R]

~ Motherlode Gardens (Yosemite, California) ~ 

Ancient OG F5 - 1972 Iranian Landrace x Snow Lotus {Bodhi Seeds Hierloom IBL} [R] 200

~ Twenty20 Genetics (Mendacino, California) ~ 

SFV OG Bx5 (SFV OG IBL) - San Fernando Valley OG Kush [R] 150

~ Elev8 Seeds (Seattle, Washington) 

Bruce Banner OG - OG Kush (Ghost Cut) x Strawberry Diesel [R] 140

~ Jaws Genetics ~ 

Fruity Pebbles OG IC1 - Fruity Pebbles OG F2 x Fruity Pebbles OG F1 [R] 200

~ OrgnKid / Zoolander ~ 

Banana OG F3 - OG Kush x Sagmartha strain [R] {Original Seed Stock} 200

~ GG Strains (Las Vegas, Nevada - RIP Joesy Whales) ~ 

Gorilla Glue #4 IBL (Original Glue) - GG4 x GG4 Bx6 [R] 300 {Original Seed Stock of Michigan / Los Angeles High Times Cannabis Cup Winner 2014 and High Times Jamaican World Cup Winner.}

~ FYG Tree (Santa Cruz, CA) ~ 

Black Rose F13 (Heath Robinson IBL) - Black Russian x Shiva Skunk (purple pheno) [R] 200 Shiva Skunk Bx - Shiva Skunk x Black Rose F12 [R]

~ AK Bean Brains (Anchorage, Alaska breeder and old school genetic preservationist holding beans & cuts for over 30 years from original Dutch Seedbank stocks.) ~ 

N L #1 x N L #5 [R] 100 TK/NL5 Haze - Triangle Kush x Northern Lights #5 [R] 100 (Northern Lights #1 x Big Skunk) x Northern Lights #1 [R] 100 (Big Skunk x Northern Lights #1) x Super Skunk [R] 100 95 Black Domina - Northern Lights x Ortega x Hash Plant x Afghani [R] 100 Black Domina Bx (Black Domina x Pacific Northwest Hash Plant) x Northern Lights #1 [R] 100 (Black Domina x Matanuska Thunder Fuck) x Northern Lights #1 [R] 100 Matanuska Thunder Fuck Bx3 - Alaska Thunder Grape x Dutch Thunder Fuck [R] 100 {Northern Lights was brought to Neville Schoenmakers in the Netherlands in 1985, where he worked the line before releasing it under “The Seed Bank of Holland” ~ NL #5 became the High Times Cannabis Cup Winner in 1989, 1990 and 1992 and is considered one of the most influential strains of all time. These seeds have been preserved in Alaska since the late 80s.}

~ The Nature Farm (Real NorCal Culture) ~ 

Cheddar Skunk V2 - 89’ UK Cheese (Exodus Cut) x Uncle Festers Skunk #18 IBL [R] 100 Hidden Hills Skunk - 94’ SFV OG x Uncle Festers Skunk #18 IBL [R] 100 Uncle Festers Skunk #18 IBL aka Skunkbud - Afghani Indica x Mexican Sativa (64’ Brick Weed) x Colombian Gold & Red [R] 100 {Original Hells Angels strain bred in 1964 by “Uncle Fester” an early 60’s psychologist turned outlaw. Authentic Original Skunk #1 lineage that is pre Skunkman. Preserved / held by family in Northern California over 3 generations.}

~ Doc D Seeds ~ 

Bandaid Haze ix 3.0 (Piff) - Cuban Black Haze x A5/Thai [R] 200 (2 packs) {These seeds originally came from a Spanish grower in the “A5 crew” out of Southern Holland. “A5” was short for their NL#5 x Haze A open Thai pollination project. These seeds were shared with legendary grower Bodhi, who found one male and used it to pollinate a cut of “Cuban Black Haze” that he had. The strain was referred to as “Piff” and the seeds were shared almost exclusively with Doc D. After running the seeds, Doc selected “Piff #7” and shared the cut back with Bodhi who further worked the line. The cut was a significantly better long flowering haze variety with a shorter flowering time than the Cuban Black Haze mother or A5 father. Bodhi then later referred to the strain as “Bandaid Haze” coining the term because he said “it heals all wounds” This genome has direct lineage to the New York Hazes (NYC Piff / Uptown Piff / Washington Heights Haze) of the 2000s without any of the paranoia/anxiety that came from many of the hazes from that era. Many world renowned breeders agree that most of the “New York Haze” and “New York City Piff” varieties are all just different cuts of the same strain, that most likely comes from an early selection of Neville Schoenmakers (NL#5 x Haze) which is often referred to as the “pinnacle of cannabis breeding” that has dominated cannabis scene from the 1980s in Holland to the present day.}
{Fems}

~ Mass Medical Strains (Massachusetts) ~ 

Star Pupil - Purple Thai x Afghan/Pakistan [F] 150 {High Times Flower of Month - Jan. 2017} Pu Tang - Star Pupil x Tangie [F] {High Times Top 10 Strains of 2019} 150 Grape Pupil - Pu Tang x Star Pupil [F] 150 Triangle Pupil - Triangle Kush x Star Pupil [F] 150 Bubba Pupil - Pre-98 Bubba Kush (Katsu Bluebird) x Star Pupil [F] 150 Nepali Blue - Nepalese White Mountain Charas Sativa Heirloom x Blue Magoo Bx2 [R] 200

~ Compound Genetics (Portland, Oregon) ~ 

Gelateria - Acai Berry Gelato x Jet Fuel Gelato [F] 150 Liquid Imagination - Blue Zkittlez x Jet Fuel Gelato [F] 150 Icicles - White Sherbet x Jet Fuel Gelato [F] 150 Petrol Rainbows - Sour Gelato 5 x Jet Fuel Gelato [F] 150 The Menthol S1 - The Menthol x The Menthol [F] 150 {Jet Fuel Gelato - Gelato 45 x (High Octane OG x Jet Fuel G6)} {The Menthol - Gelato 45 x (White Diesel x (High Octane x Jet Fuel G6))}

~ Phinest Cannabis (Sacramento, California) x Cannarado (Colorado) ~ 

PB Souffle - Dosidos x Lava Cake [F] 150 Lava Breath - Mendobreath F3 x Lava Cake [F] 150 Magma Cookies - Cuvee Cookies x Lava Cake [F] 150 {Lava Cake - Grape Pie x Thin Min Girl Scout Cookies} {First major genetic line released to public that was created from tissue culture / micropropagation - RIP Jai Malloy (founder of Phinest Cannabis)}

I always hear, "Just reflavor it and it works," and personally, I really like the idea that you can reframe the explanation of something to suit and personalize your character. It’s really useful, but considering magic in the Forgotten Realms (and in other realities that use the D&D magic system), doesn't it become a bit conflicting? Or at least, doesn't it spoil the reflavoring in a certain way, turning it into something merely "decorative" within the narrative perspective?
Let's start with the fact that when you cast a specific spell, you are casting "that" spell, not exactly the reflavored one. This means that any other resource or "source" that can determine which spell was used will say you cast spell X, not Y as the player wanted.
I'll try to give an example: let's say a player creates a chronomancer who, when casting "Ray of Frost," has reflavored it to "Ray of Deceleration." The idea is pretty cool, but if any other resource, like an item that can reveal cast spells, or an archmage investigating the area to discover the type of magic used, wouldn't they identify the spell itself? "Ah, yes, he used Ray of Frost; you can tell by the freezing effects on the body. It’s a common trick, so we're probably dealing with a not-so-experienced mage."
My point is: reflavoring, at least in terms of spells that have a system more or less translatable into the fictional reality, kind of kills the idea of the spells, doesn't it? Yes, you can describe what the spells look like; in Tasha's, if I remember correctly, this is mentioned. But the spells are still traceable, understandable. They have an identification that makes them what they are, which makes the reflavoring just an appearance within the game’s reality. So, even if an NPC says, "No, he used a translucent thing that made the Goblin move entirely slowly, as if he were slow in time itself!" it would just be responded with: "That was just the appearance of the magic being manifested, it has nothing to do with time. The original form of that spell is still Ray of Frost; do you want me to demonstrate it for you?"
Don’t get me wrong, I find it harder to allow this kind of thing when it comes to spells. One of my players has an Eladrin who is a Half-Elf, and his teleportation is described as "he puts himself in another timeline and establishes it in the present so briefly that only he moves." And that’s fine — racial ability, item, or any other thing like that, I find much easier, because he’s not following a parameter like a spell that has V, S, M components. Any of these can reveal what the spell really is, not the player’s flavor. This makes the player more of a "cosplayer" than what they determined they are.
This thought came up when my player and I were discussing what he would do at higher levels since there aren't many Dunamancy spells available, and there are other Wizard spells that can't be ignored. So, it’s something that’s been on my mind since then.
Have any of you dealt with this in your games? Again, I’m very much in favor of reflavoring, but I find spells much more limiting in this regard, and I always think that if they ever conflict, it would be horrible. So, how would you handle this?

If Jace condones or plans B&C, it would be very bad, worse than when Dt killed his wife - second only to Rhaenys' casual Terrorism
DARK AND EDGY DOESN'T EQUAL MORE INTERESTING.

• A character being evil doesn't mean better written or more interesting. In most cases, just making a character evil is a surefire way to ruin the character.
• Yes, Jace beat his bro once, so did his elder bro - about 40 times. That means tomorrow, if he kills or doesn't bat an eye at the murder of children (for revenge) and nothing else, we should have seen it coming.
• Remember in GoT, Jon, Robb, and Sansa, even Tyrion and Arya, who go ultra-dark, are basically in the same situation Jace is in right now, and they never had any ill will toward Tommen and Myrcella. Most of them even think fondly of them (but for Tyrion that one time).

This is Jace we're talking about, the same guy who was spooked by Daemon and Ceraxes threatening some KG. Two days later, he's with Mysaria plotting the greatest scheme in CK AGOT history. Jace's dynamic with Daemon was one of the more interesting parts of his character in season, and they should lean way more into it to make him and Dragonstone more interesting. Here's how it should be done:
TURMOIL ON DRAGONSTONE, TEAM BLACK INNER CONFLICT
Reddit recently introduced a theory that season two will split up the black into two camps. The radicals [Daemon, Jace, Baela, and Mysaria] and the Conservatives [Rhaenyra, Rhaenys, and Corlys]. I love this idea, as internal conflict, when done right, is better than external. But the team doesn't make sense.
Radicals should be Mysaria, Daemon, Rhaenyra (Them going rogue was meant to be the point of the final scene of S1). Conservatives are Rhaenys, Corlys, and the Kids.
Firstly, kids who aren't Joffrey or Ramsey should have a predisposition for Honorable warfare. As proven earlier with the KG loyalty, this scene is where Jace leans. Also, Baela was raised by Rhaenys and should logically lean to her side.
Daemon and Rhaenyra already murdered a man in cold blood, almost jokingly. They should be the ones cool with child murder, not the kids. If you want to make Jace and Baela interesting, here are some ideas for you:
P.S: Rhaenyra shouldn't be cool with B&C, but she shouldn't be completely shut off to Daemon and Mysaria. Rhaenyra is Dragonstone, Rhaenyra is the realm. The point of two opposing Camps should be to pull Rhaenyra in both directions and give her hard choices.
Now concerning Jace and Baela:
a)Jace (The angel on the queen's shoulder):
It would make sense that, similar to Davos, Jace (alongside Rhaenys) should be a voice of reason for Stannis, I mean Rhaenyra, counteracting DT and Mysaria.
Also, similar to Davos, Jace's conflict should be to convince himself first, then others, that his monarch is just, despite the f-uped things they do, while also being antagonistic to the devils whispering at court (Mysaria and Melisandre).
Davos convinces Sala (Legendary Sailor), the King's Men (Different gods), and the Manderlers (honorable knights) to back Stannis. Jace convinces Corlys (Legendary Sailor), the Northmen (Different gods), and the Manderlers and Knights of the Vale (honorable knights) to back Nyra.
b) Baela (Torn Between two Parents):
Baela has two parents, Daemon and Rhaenys, who happen to be leaders of both factions on Dragonstone. Baela for now leans heavily towards Rhaenys, but she has just been reunited with daddy. Couple that with Luke's murder, the internal conflict the B&C should cause, and the fact that they are at war, and her morality is being slowly chipped away in time for Rooks Rest. After that, she can go either way - Ruthless radicalism to revenge Grandma and protect Lil' Bros and Lil' Sis, or dial it back to honor Grandma.
If she swings towards Ruthlessness, that is good conflict between her and Jace instead of "I'm mad you cheated on me even though we haven't seen each other in 8 years" (Also parallel to Jon being shocked by Val's ruthlessness when it concerned Shireen and Freefolk rights).
BONUS: THEORY OR RATHER PITCH ON JACE'S FUTURE
Jace should die at Tumbleton, not the Gullet. The only effect Jace's death has in the book is it gets Rhaenyra out of the hospital bed. Plus, that death is super anti-climatic, second only to Daeron's. Now imagine this:

• Jace is betrayed by his dragonseeds at Tumbleton, and Cregan is also present at Tumbleton and escapes.
• So we have Jace dying because a frankly stupid decision of his (sharing nukes), in the presence of his bro, and he would be avenged by his two Bros (Addam and Cregan).
• Maybe Cregan flees to the God's Eyes. Maybe Jace refuses Baela from coming with him, and he would have won if Baela was by his side. Also, Daeron will be present, and Daeron is Jace's rival (Maybe he almost beats Daeron, and that is when Hugh betrays him).

You can see a death at Tumbleton is far more satisfying for Jace than shot by an arrow when he flew "too low".
Potential Ramifications of Jace's Death:

• Aegon attacks Dragonstone now that Jace isn't coming back.
• Rhaenyra needs vengeance, and Addam and Nettles are scapegoats instead of "I hate bastard and your smashing my Uncle". Also, Mysaria, the Daemon on her shoulder, has free reign now that both Angels, Rhaenys and Jace, are dead.

This would probably not happen, but it was good to get my ideas out there.

Disclaimer: I do not speak Korean. This is purely translated by machine with a lot of cleanup afterward. With that in mind, I am open to criticism to improve these translations. Enjoy!
​
Chapter 426
​
Whoosh!
​
The instant he confronted the colossal Fire Dragon emerging from the spearhead, the Arch Lich had a stark realization.
​
'It's too late.'
​
The attack was inescapable.
​
His unspoken spell and the nearly completed magic dissipated among the abrupt inferno that enveloped him.
​
Radiating the Fire of Calamity, the Fire Dragon opened its gaping maw towards the paralyzed Arch Lich, who had become numb to even pain.
​
Boom!
​
A draconian roar accompanied by billowing blue flames engulfed everything. The air warped, and the searing heat vaporized all in its path.
​
The Arch Lich felt his magical barriers and shields dissolving, reviving sensations he thought he had long forgotten.
​
'It's hot.'
​
Roar!
​
The blue Fire of Calamity dominated his vision. The Fire Dragon, unrelenting, swept over him and continued its relentless flight.
​
Its target was the enormous black Gate at the heart of the devastated city.
​
Wait, it was hurtling towards the Gate.
​
'No!'
​
In a surge of panic, the Arch Lich's red eyes widened, and he extended his hand futilely as the Fire Dragon consumed the Gate, nearly equal in size.
​
At that moment, when the flames met the extraordinary magical power fueled by the life force of countless humans, a blinding explosion erupted.
​
Boom!
​
A pillar of light visible from vast distances ascended.
​
Darkness clashed with blue flames, merging rapidly. The stripped skyscrapers that had barely held against the onslaught now crumbled, unleashing a ring of tempestuous winds.
​
Gurgurrrrrugug.
​
An unspeakable roar and tremor shook the earth.
​
The ash-gray sky cracked open, and the dense fog smothering the city dispersed like a dispelled illusion.
​
Then, as if it were all a fleeting dream, a tranquil silence descended.
​
'Ah.'
​
With a vacant stare, the Arch Lich surveyed the landscape.
​
The scene was ostensibly unchanged, yet he knew — everything, including himself, had irreversibly transformed. It had all crumbled, like a sandcastle at high tide.
​
Slowly, the Arch Lich turned his gaze. The trembling red glow fell upon a figure, imposing as a steel tower.
​
- I should have killed you.
​
A declaration that pierced the stillness.
​
Pale as death, Jin Tae-Kyung spoke. Despite appearing on the brink of collapse from the physical toll and mental strain of endless battles, his voice retained its unwavering force.
​
"I know. Why didn't you kill me quickly?"
​
The Arch Lich's lips sealed shut. The missed chance to end Jin Tae-Kyung's life was his error.
​
A lapse in vigilance had undone everything.
​
'My King, please forgive this disloyal servant.'
​
The Arch Lich sought forgiveness from his King, wherever he might be.
​
Had he not hesitated, had he slain Jin Tae-Kyung before the human's monstrous ally was reborn and drove that cursed sword into his chest... all would have unfolded as ordained.
​
He would have endured, finalized the Gate, and unleashed legions of monsters to devastate humanity and ignite their cities.
​
All while anticipating the return of the formidable King.
​
Yet, his flawless scheme had crumbled spectacularly.
​
All due to one man — Jin Tae-Kyung.
​
The crimson in the Arch Lich's eyes ignited with dwindling power.
​
He silently vowed vengeance, and his oath of retribution echoed towards Jin Tae-Kyung.
​
- Remember me. One day, I will trample your souls with my bare feet.
​
Jin Tae-Kyung spat out a glob of phlegm.
​
"The one that's about to die always spouts bullshit. How about you try calling Asmodeus a bastard instead? If you do, I may consider ending this quickly."
​
The Skeleton King hesitated before speaking.
​
- Asmodeus, you bastard...
​
"Not you."
​
- Ah, I know. I just wanted to try it once. But it feels wrong to say such disrespectful words.
​
"Why? You're a king now, too."
​
- Yes, that's right.
​
By the River of Death, he swore to tear those two apart.
​
The Arch Lich extended both hands towards Jin Tae-Kyung and the Skeleton King.
​
His skeletal fingers tightened as if to obliterate them from a distance, yet nothing ensued.
​
Instead, a stray wind caressed his entire form.
​
Swoosh.
​
It was disintegration. Beginning with the Arch Lich's hands, his very essence started to erode.
​
Arms, legs, torso, and at last, the skull housing the dimming red glow.
​
- Please survive. Until the day we meet again... [Note: the second villain who wishes the MC a long life.]
​
A voice steeped in bitterness mingled with the wind and faded away.
​
The growing tempest scattered the ashes that were once the Arch Lich.
​
As it howled, its reach extended to everything within the radius of One Strike, leaving behind a desolate landscape of collapsed skyscrapers, heaps of concrete, overturned vehicles, and lifeless bodies...
​
And the unfinished colossal Gate, which might have sparked an even more catastrophic war.
​
Whoosh.
​
In the midst of this desolation, Jin Tae-Kyung stood in silence, a solitary chime ringing in his ears, audible only to him amidst the chaos.
​
Ding. Ding. Ding.
​
A flood of System notifications clouded his vision, signaling the end of the ordeal.
​
Yet, Jin Tae-Kyung’s body, drained of all energy, began to sway towards the earth.
​
'I did it.'
​
With that single thought, he surrendered to a profound and serene slumber.
​
And the Skeleton King, carefully catching the falling form of Jin Tae-Kyung, could see it.
​
The faint smile spreading across his lips.
​
- You've worked hard.
​
Wicked but still a decent human, he murmured to himself.
​
Intent on transporting Jin Tae-Kyung to a place of rest and safety, the Skeleton King suddenly recalled something he had forgotten.
​
- Oh, right. The sword.
​
Was it called 'Hero's Soul'? He wasn't sure who had named it, but it was certain that a mysterious power was imbued in it.
​
It was thanks to that sword that he, once a Skeleton Warlord on the verge of extinction, had been awakened and able to deal a serious blow to the dreadful Arch Lich.
​
- I almost forgot. I must make sure to take it.
​
Locating the sword didn't take long. It had lain quietly at the spot where the Arch Lich last stood, embedded in its chest until the final moments.
​
Yet, as the Skeleton King lifted the [Hero's Soul], confusion furrowed his brow.
​
- Hmm, something feels off.
​
It was a strange sensation, difficult to explain.
​
It might be accurate to say that while it remained a legendary sword, its mystical aura seemed somewhat diminished.
​
- Did I pick up the wrong sword?
​
But despite a thorough search and close inspection of the sword, nothing seemed amiss.
​
After some contemplation, scratching his golden skull, the Skeleton King concluded.
​
- Hmm. It must be the right one, I suppose.
​
He thought it was just a momentary feeling. The sword he remembered looked the same, and he had seen it fall from Arch Lich's chest at the last moment.
​
'But why does this feel so unsettling?'
​
It was a perplexing anomaly. The Skeleton King shook his head and tucked the sword between his pelvic bones for safekeeping.
​
As he approached the fallen Jin Tae-Kyung, he remained oblivious.
​
Unseen by him, as Jin Tae-Kyung succumbed to unconsciousness, drained of all strength, a mist-like black energy mingled with the dispersing wind.
​
Simultaneously, the golden light that had clung to the [Hero's Soul] disapeared from the sword as it pursued this dark essence.
​
But this light was not merely riding the wind.
​
The black energy, intertwined with the wind, drifted along until his path was obstructed.
​
The Arch Lich, now merely a feeble fragment of his former soul, widened his eyes at the dazzling golden light shimmering before him.
​
'Such an absurdity.'
​
Before dissolving, the Arch Lich’s final words to Jin Tae-Kyung and the Skeleton King were sincere.
​
He vowed a swift return, ready to drench the land with blood, wielding greater power and commanding a vaster horde of monsters than ever before.
​
Life Force Vessel.
​
A high-level dark magic exclusive to the undead, capable of preserving fragments of souls, was thought to prevent eternal obliteration. [Note: like a horcrux from Harry Potter.]
​
Or so he had thought, until that resplendent golden light intercepted him.
​
- What are you?
​
Now reduced to a mere sliver of a soul, the Arch Lich was no match for the brilliance emanating from the light.
​
Mixed emotions of anger, astonishment, and fear intensified the black energy.
​
Despite the Arch Lich’s thoughts reaching out, the golden light remained impassive, merely intensifying its radiance and expanding in size.
​
Then, the Arch Lich understood the true essence of the light.
​
It was not magic but a soul. The soul of someone he had once crushed and defiled. Though formless, it persisted within the sword, sustained solely by sheer will.
​
The Arch Lich suddenly recalled one of the memories he had buried deep in his mind.
​
​
​
'You are noble, human. What is your name?'
​
​
​
On that day of carnage, where blood ran like rivers and corpses mounted like hills, amidst ruins and death, one human stood defiant till the end.
​
- Lei Fei.
​
The movement of the Arch Lich, or rather the black energy, halted abruptly.
​
The brilliant golden light burst forth from the void, enveloping him like a tidal wave.
​
Whoosh!
​
'...Damn it all.'
​
And those were the Arch Lich's final thoughts.
​
​
​
* * *
​
​
​
The atmosphere on the battlefield, where the main forces congregated, was electric.
​
As the S-rank Hunters and a contingent of troops moved to the rear to forge a pathway for the suicide squad, tens of thousands of monsters capitalized on the opportunity to launch an assault.
​
「Fire Rain!」
​
Boom!
​
From the back lines, the mage unit unleashed their area-wide magic, and a torrential downpour of fire descended upon the enemy.
​
In that moment, as hundreds of monsters were reduced to cinders, the mages' fists clenched in grim resolve.
​
Squeal! Crack!
​
「...Huh?」
​
One mage, his face etched with confusion, wiped away the blood that had splashed across his features.
​
The face of his comrade, who had shared a smile just moments ago, was obliterated. No, it had been blown apart.
​
This was the work of a black lance, piercing through the air like a beam of light from a distance.
​
Squeal, boom!
​
Another lance hurtled through the air, impaling several mages before their screams could even begin.
​
「Aaagh!」
​
「Death Knights! It's Death Knights!」
​
「Damn it, what the hell are you talking about! Weren't they all dealt with?」
​
「No, it seems not! It looks like they had hidden some elite monsters among them!」
​
This foreboding pronouncement quickly became a gruesome reality.
​
With the S-rank Hunters away, elite monsters emerged on the battlefield, initiating a brutal massacre.
​
Screech!
​
Boom!
​
Death Knights, Liches, and scores of invisible Wyverns materialized, unleashing a ruthless onslaught.
​
As people fell and monsters advanced without pause, a profound despair settled over those who fought desperately to hold their ground.
​
Even if the S-rank Hunters were present, this battle would have been tough to emerge victorious from.
​
'It's all over.'
​
And just when all seemed lost, as they braced for death.
​
Swoosh!
​
The blade of a Death Knight, caught mid-slash through a victim, suddenly halted.
​
No, it disintegrated into ash.
​
"W-what is this...?"
​
A hunter who had narrowly escaped death looked around in astonishment.
​
It was a sight beyond belief.
​
First, hundreds fell, then thousands disintegrated.
​
Before long, tens of thousands of monsters were disintegrating into ash and collapsing.
​
Swoosh.
​
It was the beginning of the end.
​
Previous Table of Contents Next

My husband (30m) and I (28f) have been together for over 10 years. About 5 years ago I asked if he would be interested in opening our marriage. Since we started dating kinda young I hadn’t really gotten the chance to date and I wanted to experience sex with other people. I had no intention of leaving my husband, I just wanted to explore. He was a bit hesitant but agreed. During the time our relationship was open I dated 2 guys but my husband didn’t have much luck. I’m not sure if this is because he wasn’t trying or just him being unlucky. About 3 years ago I became pregnant and decided I didn’t want the relationship to be open anymore because I wanted us to focus on our family. We had kinda discussed it but hadn’t officially closed it.
After our son was born (around 2022) I became more certain that I wanted to close the relationship but my husband said he didn’t want to. I was a bit taken aback but I tried to be understanding. He made a remark about being in some sort of hypersexual stage in his life and since I knew I wasn’t feeling quite like myself anymore since the pregnancy I tried to just accept his want to continue to be open. However, I still kinda felt like we should be more focused on our family. I tried kinda dating a guy for a bit but I just didn’t feel the same anymore and I once again went to my husband asking if he was ready to close the relationship. He said if I wanted to close the relationship now it would be a problem, which I didn’t understand. I asked him if he was seeing someone and he told me no. It seemed a bit odd to me that he would be so adamant about our relationship being open if he wasn’t but once again I let it go.
After the conversation I kinda felt like he was trying to punish me because he didn’t really want to be in the open relationship when I first suggested it but I also feel like if he didn’t want to he could have just said no. I don’t feel like I pressured him into our relationship being open but I do think that he wasn’t super into it. However when I would check in with him he was just kinda whatever about it. I can see how I was wrong for not closing the relationship then but at the same time when I would ask him if he wanted to close the relationship he would be kinda sarcastic and upon further discussion just say it’s fine. So I can see how I should have just taken that as a sign to close the relationship but I didn’t and I see now how that was selfish. However, I feel like I have been clear since my pregnancy that I want is to focus on our family. When we didn’t have a child I felt like it didn’t matter because we didn’t need to be concerned about another person but now that we have a child I’m not comfortable or know how to manage an open relationship in a way that will not have detrimental consequences on the children.
So for about a year after our son was born he was adamant about the open relationship continuing even though I wanted to close it and I did my best to be understanding even though I did not like it. He actually started seeing someone about 9 months ago and I didn’t like it but he said he just wanted to have his fun like I did. Okay fine. He told me she would be moving so it would only last about 4 months. Fast forward 4 months and he told me that her plans changed so she would still be around for another 4 months. During this time I learned I was pregnant with our second child and so I really started to feel like I wanted him to be more present to support me through my pregnancy since we already have a toddler. I once again expressed this and he told me that she’d only be around until January 2025. Now I’m annoyed because I am due October and he’s making it seem like it’s not big deal that he wants to continue seeing her when we’ll have a newborn and a toddler to care for. I told him that it’s really not fair and that I don’t like it because he’s repeatedly pushed back the date and it feels like his exploration with the woman is much more emotionally invested than he’s leading on. I also worry that January will come and he’s going to tell me that she’s staying longer. He’s talking about only seeing her 2 or 3 times a week once the baby comes but that seems like to much to me when I’ll be healing from delivery and we will now have 2 kids under 3.
I definitely feel like he is too emotionally invested and it’s starting to feel like he’s cheating on me. I know that sounds ridiculous because we are technically still open and I feel like since he didn’t do more exploration in the beginning it’s not fair for me to close the relationship when he seems to be having fun now. However, no one was stopping him from exploring before we had kids so why now?
I told him I can’t do this anymore and that I cannot accept him continuing this relationship past September. He told me that it was too bad because he had no intention of ending it.
Would I be the AH if I decided to divorce him? What am I supposed to do if I’m no longer comfortable with our relationship being open?

I had a dream that cloning humans passed through Congress and we were allowed to clone given a license. It started with couples with infertility cloning their DNA to have their child, but secret items began to put up. It was soon found out that only one part of the DNA was needed and the way the organism came out was completely customizable.
They could grow to an adult, you could enhance how much they like you, you change anything at will that was legal.
After work, I passed by my friend’s desk and strand of hair on the keyboard. I took it to the embassy and asked to make a 25 year old woman who loved me and cared for me with her being. I was honest and told them that I was never loved or wanted by anyone in my life and I just want a lifelong romantic companion to keep me company.
Apparently, they never met someone with this request and the two men in hazmat suits went to the back to their director. The director came out, an old man and he looked at me with disgust … and pity. After an intense minute of him staring me, he just muttered the words “Fine. Use the product waiver before you start it up.” One of the guys in the suits began to complain about how morally wrong this was.
And the other guy took me over this large machine, and asked if I had any samples of what my girlfriend would look like. I gave him the strand of hair and he deposited in the machine. He took a scan of my face and body, and set the romantic and emotional capability to 100%. He let me customize how she would look — and strangely, I made her close to the woman I fell in love with. He said it would take about a month to get her to come out with the ability to talk, speak, understand, and develop into a woman.
I waited and when I came out to pick her up, she rushed into my arms and hugged me. We had an incubation period where we sat and talked for hours in a room, alone. And it was very emotional. Never have I had a woman talk to me with so much vigor, so much interest, that asking her to be my girlfriend was as easy as asking for a pencil for a test.
When we got home, we didn’t do anything perverted. We just sat back and held each other. She talked me as if she knew me for over a decade. I told her I don’t make that much and she said “that’s fine, I’ll be your side regardless, sweetie.”
I saw her give a huge grin and I woke up crying.
I wanna go back.

I've been using my Dygma Defy for several months now. It integrated quite well with most of my workflows, from programming to 3d modeling and drawing, I finally have the layers and macros configured exactly how I want them.
The only thing that keeps me going back to my old keyboard is lack of proper KVM support (I was about to ask for help about it not working and I saw the "do not plug it into KVM" line on the pinned post). Since I need to work between macOS/Windows/Linux, I cannoy really use the Defy as much as I want to.
Are there any plans on supporting KVM in the near future? I may end up needing to mover to the Glove80 if I can't find a way to make the Dygma to easily switch between computers.

I got the game since a lot of people have said it's one of the best games ever made. But I can't get used to the camera controls.
To those who played it on PC with a keyboard and mouse how did you manage? Is there any settings I can change to make the camera behave normally like others game?

Phil Aston: Hello and welcome to the Now Spinning Magazine podcast with me, Phil Aston. And in this episode, I’m absolutely delighted to have with me Tony Martin, one of the UK’s most underrated rock vocalists. You’ve had a really varied career, but what we’re going to talk about today specifically is Black Sabbath and the new “Anno Domini” box set. So, welcome, Tony. Thank you so much for joining me.
Tony Martin: Thank you. And thank you for having me on the show. Very cool.
Phil Aston: A bit of context, because I think this is kind of helpful for you. My son is 30 now, but when he was 15, he set up a Facebook group, kind of saying, “One day, please can we have the Tony Martin Black Sabbath albums released?” That was 15 years ago. He was still at school, half his lifetime ago. And I think in the early time when he set this up, he may have reached out to you and you might have said something like, “I don’t think it’s gonna happen, Dan.” And here we are, all these years later, and it’s not only happened, but it comes out this Friday. How does that feel to know that these albums are now going to be available again?
Tony Martin: Well, first of all, well done to your son. It took 15 years, but he got it done. To be honest, there’s been a few periods when I didn’t think it was happening. In fact, about a year ago, Tony Iommi’s manager called me and said, “You know what, this is just so complicated. I don’t think we can do this.” So I was resigned to it not happening myself. It’s all to do with band politics, really. There are so many people involved or have their fingers in the pie that they all have to be on board. And there were allegiances changing all over the place, left, right, and center. So in the end, it was getting a bit tiring, but well done to Tony Iommi and BMG. My God, the patience they showed to get this thing together and actually get it out there. Wow. But how does it feel? It feels brilliant, to be honest. I’m very excited. I haven’t actually had these albums in my own hands physically for the past 25 years. I gave all mine away thinking I’d be able to get some more, and I didn’t. They just stopped making them. So to actually physically hold them again is really cool. What a great job they’ve done of it. So I’m thrilled and excited. And I’m helping out now because I’m not in the band, obviously, anymore. So I just offered my help to promote it and they said, “Great, let’s do it.”
Phil Aston: Isn’t it amazing? Because I’ve done quite a few reviews about Black Sabbath box sets and stuff, but this one, within about 12 hours, there’s literally 12,000 views of the review. The love for this period of Black Sabbath is actually huge. It’s grown. It almost feels as if the profile is higher now than it was at the time.
Tony Martin: Yeah, there is a kind of reason for that. Partly people have got over the “it’s the new guy” thing, and also it’s been 25 years since. So now we’re reaching out to a whole other group of people, in addition to those that were already there. But to the outside world, it looks like there was a huge gap, and to me it felt like a huge gap. But actually, the fans were always there. I’ve been waiting myself as well to get this back out there. And it’s just band politics, really. That’s all it is.
Phil Aston: Because you had that period when it was almost as if this part of Sabbath’s history was hidden because of band politics. None of this really happened, which I think probably stirred up more interest and kind of people wanting to find out more.
Tony Martin: Yeah, it could be. It’s an old famous thing, you know, if something ain’t around for a while, people start talking about it. But yeah, it’s a strange thing, the music business. You’re either in fashion or you’re not. But I am just thrilled that they’ve got around it. Just the patience they’ve shown to actually put this together. At one point they were just saying, “We can’t do it.” But I’m really chuffed anyway.
Phil Aston: I imagine there’s been compromises along the way. Lots of fans probably don’t understand how complicated the politics and all the different licenses and everything that goes on over the years, they become more and more entangled. People say, “Where’s Eternal Idol?” But of course, that was a different record label. Different people own it.
Tony Martin: Yeah, absolutely. It’s owned by somebody else. And also Eternal Idol, or “Eternal Idiot,” as we call it, was kind of reissued not that long ago. Really.
Phil Aston: That’s right. With the two CD version, wasn’t it?
Tony Martin: Yeah. So they were kind of thinking, “Well, there’s no real panic because that’s already been done and let’s just move on.” Because that would have wrapped them up in contracts for centuries, I think. I can’t even think that they’ll ever get them to let that go. But they were struggling to get the people involved with these four albums to make up their minds and do stuff. I’ve been all for it all the way along, I have to say. Obviously, because it’s my career, my history. It’s not just the band’s history. It’s ten years of my life that went AWOL. So, yeah, I’ve been up for it all the way along, but some people don’t and it’s taken them a while to get on board.
Phil Aston: I think it’s fantastic. The first one was Headless Cross. You joined one of the biggest rock bands with all that history behind it. You were an established singer with the Alliance. But this was a chance, as you say, with Eternal Idol, you went in and it was already prepared. You sang it, but this one was where you could really put your mark on it, your personality lyrically as well as musically. Can you remember what it was like actually being at the beginning of that? Did you feel comfortable around Iommi and Powell and thinking, “Right, what kind of lyrics am I going to do by Headless Cross?”
Tony Martin: Yeah, I was comfortable by then. Well, kind of. The thing is, with Eternal Idol, if I can just backstep a little bit. The Eternal Idol wasn’t the first call up. The first call up was in 1986 when they were doing the Seventh Star with Glenn Hughes. And that scared me to death because I can’t sing like Glenn Hughes. Nobody can sing like Glenn Hughes. They put me on standby back then, so I’d sort of tentatively had an introduction to Tony Iommi. Then in ’87, they got me in for the audition, and that was the next introduction to Tony Iommi. But because Eternal Idol was already written, that gave me a whole year plus a bit more to find out what this thing was. What the hell was I supposed to do? So just doing Eternal Idol like that was fine by me because I didn’t have to discover anything myself back then. It gave me a chance to get my feet in. So by the time it got to Headless Cross, now I know all the guys, and I kind of know what’s expected of me. I still had to find the “me” that I needed to find. I went around it the only way I could, by focusing on things I was interested in. I couldn’t do the lyrics and melodies that Geezer was writing for Ozzy because that was a generation before me. The stuff that Ronnie was doing was fantastic, but I couldn’t get inside his head. So I had to think about what I was going to do. I had an interest in the old gothic death stuff, like Dracula and Frankenstein, Mary Shelley type writing, and of course, in England, we have Shakespeare. Nobody speaks English like that anymore, that old English text. I thought, “Old English text, gothic death, and Black Sabbath. That might work.” So I put them all together and came up with Headless Cross, which is where I lived. I lived in a village called Headless Cross.
Phil Aston: Yeah, you put that on the map. They weren’t pleased about it. The most recognition I’ve got is my name on a bus stop. And Cozy Powell thought the album needed more death, didn’t he?
Tony Martin: Oh, that’s true. That’s actually true. We were recording “When Death Calls,” and he was in the studio playing, and he suddenly stopped. We went, “You alright?” He went, “Yeah, just remind me, what’s this song called again?” I said, “It’s called When Death Calls.” He said, “I don’t think there’s enough death in it.” And he carried on playing. So, okay, maybe he’s taking the piss, but isn’t it such a great sounding album? As Tony Iommi says, he never left Black Sabbath. So when people criticize him, saying, “You should change the name or whatever,” he never left. So it was still Black Sabbath. The riffs, the guitar sound was reaching new peaks of excellence around this time.
Because when it was just him and Ozzy, for example, it was guitar, that was it. When Geoff Nichols joined during the Dio period, it introduced a few more keyboard things. That allowed Iommi to play solos against those keyboard pads and chords. And then you come along and start sticking 50 tracks of vocal harmonies on it, like in Anno Mundi and stuff like that. It just kept developing. Sabbath isn’t really known for vocal harmonies and keyboards, but underneath that was still Tony Iommi. And it still sounded like Sabbath. We were happy to do that. We just wanted to make Tony happy and do the best for him. It was his band. So we were happy to seek out that Sabbath sound and make sure it did what it said on the tin. A couple of times, like with the Seventh Star thing, he ventured a little bit away from it. Songs like Heart Like a Wheel don’t really make the Black Sabbath sound, but it’s still good stuff. I have great respect for all of the eras that went before. I had to sing all of the songs. So I do have great respect for it. And it’s been an honor, you know, like being part of the whole story. But he was the only one that stuck it out. And we respected him for that. You’re right, they did ask him to change a couple of times. He said, “No, I can’t change now.”
Phil Aston: The next one, if I pronounce this right, it’s Tyr.
Tony Martin: Yeah.
Phil Aston: Because when it came out, me and my friends, actually, because there was no Internet back then and nowhere to go and check it, we did call it Tyr. To be.
Tony Martin: Yeah, Tyr.
Phil Aston: Watch you find in Birmingham. You know what I mean? So it actually rhymes with beer, doesn’t it?
Tony Martin: It is, yeah. Actually, it’s Tiw, which is Scandinavian for the son of Odin or something.
Phil Aston: Well, this is almost as close, probably, to Sabbath getting into almost a concept album. Isn’t it? This is a collection of songs that in another time and space you probably as a band would have gone out and performed the whole thing.
Tony Martin: Yeah, it wasn’t meant that way, but they were struggling to find a name for the album. We were recording and getting towards the end and the management called us up and said, “We really need a name for this album.” And Cozy said, “I’ve got one. Let’s call it Satanic Verses.” We went, “What, like Salman Rushdie thing?” He said, “Yeah, it would be great publicity.” We said, “Yeah, but we’ll all be dead.” So we did struggle, but they happened across the artwork. We’d done Anno Mundi, we’d done Gates of Valhalla and all that sort of stuff. They went, “What if… Tyr?” It was fine by me. So it took on the Viking sort of theme. By that time, I was thinking, once I’d done Headless Cross and started to have an interest in the Vikings and stuff. As you know, the Vikings haven’t been particularly good for us. They came over and stole all our women and sheep and whatever. But I had an interest in them as well. So I was thinking, every culture, every religion has its dark side. There’s always a devil type in a god type. I thought we could go around the world and I could do this. You could pick up on all sorts of cultures and pick out the dark side of various things. But it was the last kind of… I still did that with various other songs and various other artists. But Tyr was leaning towards that theme.
Phil Aston: It’s an excellent album. Then of course, the strangeness of the politics in Sabbath. Dehumanizer comes along and Dio re-enters the scene. You obviously had an opportunity because every cloud has a silver lining. You can go off and do your solo album at this time. But you did kind of like… It sounds like it was almost a forced relationship, the way that he was and he wasn’t. I mean, how was that period for you? Because you did demo some of the tracks, didn’t you?
Tony Martin: Firstly, it was a shock. I didn’t see that coming at all. Literally just walking out the door to the next writing rehearsals. My managers called up and said, “They don’t want you to go.” From what I recently found out, although I had my suspicions, Tony Iommi said the record label just wasn’t supporting it. They weren’t getting behind us at all. Then they started banding about all different names and stuff, and Ronnie’s name came up. They thought they’d give it a go. He said it was all on and off all the time. After they let me go, it wasn’t too long before Tony called me back and said, “Can you come back?” I said, “No, I can’t. I’m doing my solo album.” More time went by, and he called me back again and said, “Are you sure you can’t come back?” I said, “I’m doing my solo album. I really can’t.” He said, “Do you want to come down and try?” So I did. I went down and tried putting my voice on some of the songs, but it would have meant rewriting everything, and they weren’t going to do that. So I said, “The best thing is if you finish this with Ronnie, get this done and out of the way, then maybe we can talk again later.” So that’s kind of what happened. By that time, I’d done my solo album, which I wanted to get as far away from the Sabbath thing as I could at the time. I went back to doing what the Alliance and some of the bands I’d been with, that middle-of-the-road AOR type stuff. But when they called me back to Sabbath, Polydor dropped my solo album like a brick. They said, “We can’t do this if you’re going to go back with them.” So that got stopped. It’s so confusing. By the time I got back with the guys to Cross Purposes, it didn’t feel that much of a gap for me, because I’ve been talking to them and working with them through the Dehumanizer thing.
Phil Aston: Stylistically, that album, because it was on the IRS label, I know some people have said, “Well, it should be in there.” Stylistically, musically, it’s very different. I mean, you take it out. These four albums in this set, excluding Eternal Idol, they sound like a progression. Dehumanizer sounds like a kind of sidestep. Even the way the riffs are done in the songs, it’s changed. You take the vocalist out, but the music continued. You took you out and it was very different.
Tony Martin: I suppose it does a bit. If I go back and think over it, I guess that’s what it was. It was kind of an interruption into the flow of things. When we were doing Tyr, I thought we were doing really well. I thought we were onto something. Dehumanizer, in that sort of respect, does feel a little bit like an interruption. But there was some good stuff on there. Ronnie’s always been a good singer. I don’t quite know how they feel about it, but it was kind of nothing to do with me. I just let them get on with it.
Phil Aston: After that, Cross Purposes is probably, out of the four albums in this set, my personal favorite. Geezer’s back in the band now, so you’ve got his bubbling bass in there. And again, lyrically, it’s all you. Did you feel any kind of, “Oh, Geezer’s back. Will he want to help out?”
Tony Martin: I did ask. He just said, “No, you can do it.” So I just carried on.
Phil Aston
The reason why I love this album is that it’s varied. A lot of people think of Black Sabbath as the Godfathers of heavy metal, and heavy metal is always heavy metal. But if you think back to albums like Sabbath Bloody Sabbath in the seventies, they weren’t all heavy metal. There were all sorts of things on there. There were keyboards and light and shade. This, I felt, connected to that album, because you had light and shade on it. So there were more dynamics in the lyrical delivery and the song delivery, in the way that Iommi is weaving his riffs around the melodies. What are your thoughts looking back on this album now?
Tony Martin: I think you’ve just summed it up. It did sort of shift up a notch. Not only that, but the sound they were getting with Leif Mases producing it, it sort of grew up. It lifted somehow out of what they’d done before. It felt like, “Oh, this sounds good.” The songwriting and the exploring we were doing with the songs and stuff. At the time, Geezer Butler said that’s the best album he’s ever been on. He never said that again, but he said it at the time.
Phil Aston: I can imagine him saying just that.
Tony Martin: But it was good. Having Bobby Rondinelli in the band as well. Technically amazing. Brilliant player. His drums close in, and he plays with his wrists. Very technical. Whereas Cozy’s drums are stretched out far and wide. He’d lean over and hit them. But great to have them both in. What an honor. I mean, it’s Geezer Butler as well.
Phil Aston: When you got to South America, Bill Ward was in for a few gigs, wasn’t he? That must have been quite surreal. Bill Ward and Geezer playing songs like Headless Cross, which they had nothing to do with.
Tony Martin: They had nothing to do with. We were kind of weird because once we’d started to get Geezer and Bill back in, they wanted to start doing more of the older songs. That just makes you look, read between the lines going, “What’s going on? Where’s this going?” Once it’s happened to you, you know it. Then you’re reading between the lines. You start to feel it. Then you go, “Ah, right.” You can feel it. They’re clearing up. I did ask if they were going to do a reunion with Ozzy. Iommi was always denying it. Said, “No, no, we’re not doing that.” But I didn’t mind. The reason for that is because I knew what I could do in the future then. I thought, “Well, if they just tell me, that’s fine. Cause then I can plan.” The first time it was a shock and I didn’t know what to do. But I was kind of keyed up for it the next time. But he kept going. They got Bill in. I love Bill. I think he’s brilliant. We did some shows with him. But for some reason, and I don’t know what it is, I mean, I can tell you Iommi loves Bill. He regaled so many stories about when they were out there and how funny it was. I never understood why they never gave him time to get back in it. When you think of Def Leppard, they made a drum kit for a one-armed drummer.
Phil Aston: Yes, very true.
Tony Martin: Surely they can find time to get Bill settled back in. Whatever problems they’ve got. I mean, come on.
Phil Aston: You would think, yeah, very true.
Tony Martin: Get on with it. I thought, “Right, this is going to go south again.” But it didn’t. We carried on with Forbidden, and then Cozy came back after his accident. It was really up and down. Confusing. People in and out. During the time I was in the band, there were eight different lineups.
Phil Aston: It was very much a revolving door, wasn’t it? Before we move on, I just want to ask, because I know a lot of fans ask this. In the booklets in these box sets, there’s an image of Cross Purposes Live. That was a VHS tape and a CD. Is there a reason why that wasn’t included in some way? Is that game politics?
Tony Martin: I did ask about that, and they were just keen to get on with it. They said, “Come on, let’s go, let’s do it.” What they told me was that they’re going to take their time now to see what else they can gather and do an additional thing to this along the way with more of that in it. With the Cross Purposes Live and some other stuff. There’s a track that I recorded with them when Eddie Van Halen came and did Evil Eye.
Phil Aston: Yes, yeah, Evil Eye, wasn’t it?
Tony Martin: Yeah. I used to take the track out. I had it everywhere. Writing sessions, recording sessions, rehearsals. I just happened to be there. I didn’t even know who was coming. Iommi just turned up with Eddie Van Halen. I went, “Holy hell, it’s Eddie Van Halen. What’s he doing here?” He did some rehearsals with us and then disappeared. Never saw him again. But I got the recordings of the rehearsals that we did.
Phil Aston: Oh, wow.
Tony Martin: So I sent them to Tony Iommi. I said, “Use these. Get these on.” He said, “No, no, we can’t.” The reason they said was anything that has the slightest newness about it looks like a new Black Sabbath track or album track. They’re not allowed to release anything new under the Black Sabbath name. So even if it’s historical, they couldn’t allow it. It’s really weird.
Phil Aston: That means there must be lots of live stuff recorded. More bands were recording live stuff from the nineties onwards that you just couldn’t work on because it would go out under the Black Sabbath name.
Tony Martin: Not just live stuff. I’ve got about eight tracks that we never released. Just from the writing sessions and rehearsals and stuff that we used to do. They just can’t get out. They just won’t allow it.
I don’t understand. Well, I kind of understand. When you’re trying to protect your name, your mark, your image, your everything, which is where the band politics comes in, they won’t allow you to do anything that they think. And there’s all kinds of… Everybody from Ozzy to Dio to everybody. They don’t want their thing to be diluted or taken away. I do understand that. There are people involved all along the way that have an objection of some kind or another.
Phil Aston: But I guess, hopefully, this box set’s going to sell out really quickly and will show there’s a demand for this material and for this part of Black Sabbath history. There’s a lot of love for it. A lot of people worked really hard within it, like yourself. They’re great albums, wonderful songs. If there’s other music waiting in the wings, whereas we all get older, thinking through the eyes of the fan, it would go down so well, wouldn’t it? But I am, as you are, very grateful that these four albums have arrived in a box.
Tony Martin: Yes, it’s an important thing for me. It’s an important thing for the band, and it’s a great thing for the fans. I’m thrilled. It’s been an honor to be part of the story. I love the fact that it’s out there now. They did say there is no limit to the box sets. They have sold out on day one.
Phil Aston: I’m not surprised.
Tony Martin: They said the way they do it is they tend to poll the outlets and stuff and say, “How many do you think you can sell?” And they put their numbers in, and they’ve gone way past that. So now they’ve got to go back and produce more. There’s no limit to it. I love what they’ve done. There’s more in the box set than just the albums. Posters, programs, and everything.
Phil Aston: And then Forbidden. I’ll be honest, Tony, when I heard this for the first time back in the day, I didn’t like it. I tried, but I didn’t like it. My son liked it because I think probably because his dad didn’t. But now the remix, it’s as if someone’s released the drums and the guitars. It sounds like a Black Sabbath album. It sounds fantastic, doesn’t it?
Tony Martin: It does. It’s brilliant. I love the fact that they’ve dismantled it and put it back in a way that they couldn’t or didn’t with the other three. Forbidden needed it for all kinds of reasons. It was done under a sort of cloud where a lot of us weren’t really into it very much. But it was also an attempt at trying to give Sabbath a kind of acceptable twist to the youth. It didn’t work.
Phil Aston: The nineties were weird, weren’t they? The nineties were strange for heavy rock.
Tony Martin: The problem was we were fast heading towards great new bands like Nirvana and eventually Green Day and Metallica doing stuff. We were going and they were trying to change the sound to fit in. It didn’t work. We didn’t think it would. But there are people out there that love Forbidden as it is. I said that to Iommi. Last time I saw him, there are people out there that love it. He said, “They’ll probably love this version now.” But shaking the chains, guilty as hell, rusty angels, forbidden. And of course, “Loser Gets It All” is a great track. That wasn’t even on the album originally.
Phil Aston: It’s brilliant.
Tony Martin: Yeah. Strange. I absolutely love it now. It does sound like a Black Sabbath album. It sounds like it should be there in amongst the others. They’ve done a great job. Tony and his engineers have really pulled it together. It’s slightly more guitar and slightly less keyboard. They’ve done Cozy’s drums. Fantastic job on those.
Phil Aston: They’re just unleashed, aren’t they?
Tony Martin: Yes. They haven’t changed anything. They’ve mixed it and given it a new attitude, which is brilliant. They’ve given it more space. It sounds bigger. I just love what they’ve done to it. I’m really proud of it now. I didn’t like it then. There’s still a couple of tracks where I would love to have gone back in and…
Phil Aston: Yeah, you know.
Tony Martin: I thought at the time, because I was that off it at the time, my head just wasn’t quite there. A couple of tracks I thought I could have done better. I did sort of say when they were doing it, “Can I go back in?” They said, “No.”
Phil Aston: I suppose because that might edge towards it being a new recording then.
Tony Martin: Yeah, tricky. I’m not going to tell you which tracks it is, but there were a couple in there that I wasn’t quite happy with. But on the whole, it’s a great job they’ve done.
Phil Aston: Because when you were playing live, there were more songs from your period in Sabbath coming into the set, weren’t there? You were a unique vocalist in many ways for the band. You could cover Ozzy, Dio. You probably could have done Ian Gillan. Anything. You could have the ultimate set list, really, going through every era.
Tony Martin: That was a bit of a mistake. I told them I could sing anything, really. They thought, “What can we give him to sing?” They threw all sorts of stuff at me. I had a shot. Fortunately, I’ve got the kind of voice that can get around most things, and that’s a result of being in so many different kinds of music. I’ve been involved in everything from reggae to rock.
Phil Aston: Who were your key vocal influences growing up? As you say, outside of this Black Sabbath badge, your voice can go in any direction. So who were your influences? Was it blues, soul, rock?
Tony Martin: It kept changing. Everything I listened to, I thought, “That’s good. That’s good.” Each couple of years, something else took my attention. I’d really pour my soul into it. When I started off with reggae, believe it or not, I worked with Musical Youth and Dexys Midnight Runners in the studio. I was a guitarist back then. Then I loved blues. I got into prog rock bands like Yes, King Crimson, Jethro Tull. Then it shifted to Emerson, Lake & Palmer. That led to Rush and bands like that. Then I had to come down out of that prog rock technical stuff because Sabbath is much more honest and basic and straightforward. To a point. When you’re in the band and you find out how he does it, it’s stunning. I never even gave it a thought. I thought, “It’s got to be easy.” It wasn’t easy at all. Iommi can put seven, eight different riffs into one song, and each one of the riffs could be a song on their own.
Phil Aston: Very true.
Tony Martin: So, wow. You get your head around it. It’s weird. Plus, the time signatures he was throwing at us. There was a 14/4 and a 15/8 or something he was throwing at us. How he gets his head around it, I just don’t know. When I saw him a few weeks ago, he said, “You did a really good job on this.” I said, “Thanks, man.” He said, “I actually don’t know how you sang over some of this stuff.” I said, “Neither do I.”
Phil Aston: Just mad, isn’t it? You could try anything. I might have thought, “That means you might be able to put some of the songs in that Ozzy couldn’t do into the set. Or I can try something that I’ve never been able to do before because Tony says he can do anything.”
Tony Martin: It’s because I showed willing. I told them I’d have a go. And I did have a go. I did put into it. The songs, the writing, the live shows, whatever. I kind of made a rod for my own back in some ways because it was hard flicking between all of the different vocal techniques. But I did my best. It sort of came across okay. The problem is when you try to do stuff like that, it can sound a bit like a tribute act. But we got it nailed, I think. Especially having people like Cozy Powell, Geezer Butler, and all those guys in the band. We were willing to seek out that Sabbath sound, and we were conscious of it. So we were all aiming for the same thing. From outside, it might have looked like a chaotic mess. But on the inside, it all had a focus. We were all willing to give it a go. That’s what I think they saw in me. I knew they liked my voice, but I think that’s what they saw, a willingness to have a go and see if you can make it work. All those different time signatures and riffs that I had to go, looking back, to me, it’s Black Sabbath. Like,
Phil Aston I’m a Deep Purple fan, and every lineup of Deep Purple is still Deep Purple. I know Black Sabbath, there’s lots of politics in the way some of the fans look at it. But I think, which is why they had Heaven and Hell later on instead of Black Sabbath, because of the politics. But listening to these four albums, one after the other, you brought to life Viking mythology and song. More death. Just your passion and the way you projected the lyrics and your phrasing makes these albums unique. An important part of the Sabbath story. Finally, do you feel like this outpouring of love for this lineup is validating everything? Any doubt that might have been back then?
Tony Martin: Yeah, doesn’t it just? The biggest validation is from Tony Iommi himself. It wasn’t regarded that highly until he sat and listened to it without the bickering going around. When I went down a few weeks ago, he said, “You did a great job on this. There’s fantastic songs on here.” I said, “I know.” It’s just that validation that he gives it. The fact that the fans are returning to it. The fact that we’ve got new fans coming to it. Whole new record labels. I think it’s Rhino in America. It’s BMG in the UK, Europe. The record labels are coming back to it and getting behind it. They see something in it. The management sees something in it. So it’s all coming together. Which is a shame because I’m not in the band anymore.
Phil Aston Who knows? Maybe you and Tony will think, “It’d be great if some of this other stuff can come out at some point and we don’t have to wait another 25 years.”
Tony Martin: If he was going to do that, he’d say, “Let’s just write some new stuff.” But from what I’ve been told, Tony’s touring dates are done now. He won’t be going out on the road again. That’s probably out of the question for writing. I did tell him I was interested if he wants to do something. But he’s got so much going on. He’s still busy. Doing stuff. He had that ballet, the Black Sabbath ballet.
Phil Aston: Yeah, that’s true.
Tony Martin: Never saw that coming. No, he’s working on all kinds of stuff. He’s writing new material for something else now.
Phil Aston: So what about you, Tony? Have you got any plans for another solo album?
Tony Martin: I never actually stopped. For the past 25 years, my career took me into the studio and writing for people. My voice appears on 89 albums and projects now. It’s been good for me. I owe everything to Black Sabbath because that’s how the world got to hear my voice. People know what they’re talking about when they talk to me. “Can you write, can you sing on this?” They already know what they’re hearing or expecting. I always try to make it better than what they give me in the first place. A lot of that is me in the studio, and I’m happy, and I still am, happy doing that. But I do tend to choose what I do these days.
Phil Aston: Yeah, that makes sense.
Tony Martin: So I’m still doing the odd thing for people now. I did have a solo album a couple of years ago called Thorns.
Phil Aston: Great album.
Tony Martin: Yeah, totally unknown guitarist from America, Scott McClellan. I only met him because he kept badgering me on Facebook. He kept sending me stuff. I was like, “Go away.” He said, “Listen to this. What about this one?” In the end, I listened to it and it was brilliant. So I gave it a go and it turned out really well. But then Covid interrupted that and we couldn’t get out there with it. Some countries were saying, “Yeah, you can come,” and other countries were saying, “No, you can’t.” It all got distracted. I haven’t finished with Thorns because they wanted to do a vinyl for it. They said we had to take some tracks off to get it to fit on the vinyl. I don’t want to take any tracks off.
Phil Aston: Make it a double.
Tony Martin: Yeah, make it a double. Write some more. I wasn’t prepared for that. I’m pacing up, trying to write some new songs. Scott has sent me loads. We’ve got enough tracks for Thorns 2, but I haven’t finished Thorns 1 yet. I’ve got to come back to that. I do want to finish that off and get that done. Then if we can do the next Thorns thing, who knows? We’d like to try and get it out on the road. Getting out on the road for me is so different to the Sabbath thing. The Sabbath machine is huge. They only have to mention it and all the cogs start turning all at the same time all the way around the world. It all starts fitting into place within days, within weeks. On your own, it’s different. I can’t do that. I have to hire other musicians to go out on the road and rehearse the whole thing and start again with a brand new show. It’s a lot harder for me, but I would love to get back out there. My career took me into the studio, so I’ve got more to do. But I just tend to choose now.
Phil Aston: If people want to get Thorns, is it DarkstarRecords.net? Is that the best place?
Tony Martin: No, Battle God. They are the main label. Darkstar were involved and they’re still there, but they’ve had some troubles in the past couple of years. They were on board and I did two versions of it from between the two territories. I liked that. But mostly now, Battle God is the label to grab hold of it. It’s still available and I’m still signing them. People send me the stuff to sign.
Phil Aston: But I haven’t finished yet, so there’s more to come.
Phil Aston: Brilliant. Well, thanks very much, Tony, for all of your time today. Everybody, make sure you go and get a copy on CD or vinyl of this Black Sabbath Tony Martin years box set, “Anno Domini.” It’s absolutely superb.
Tony Martin: Yeah, it is good. I’m just smiling. I think it’s brilliant.
Phil Aston: No, that’s it, isn’t it? Whatever anyone thinks, these albums are available again. People can hear just how awesome this time for Sabbath really was.
Tony Martin: Thank you. Thank you very much.
Phil Aston: All right, take care, and hopefully I’ll talk to you again in the future.
Tony Martin: Thank you. All right, Phil, thanks, mate. Cheers.
Phil Aston: Well, a huge thank you to my guest, Tony Martin. That was fantastic. I’m almost lost for words in knowing what to say to sum up that interview because I know a lot of you are really interested in this box set, “Anno Domini” by Black Sabbath, which is out on CD and vinyl. Just as I thought, it’s sold out already, but there’s going to be another pressing. I was able to ask some of the questions I know some of you have been wanting to know, like why weren’t there extra tracks? Why wasn’t the live Cross Purposes included, etc. So now you know. Some of it is really exciting because it means there might be a companion set with some outtakes or live stuff as well. That’s really exciting.
Tony Martin is a fantastic vocalist, really passionate, really imaginative with his lyrics and his vision of how he writes his music. These four albums are essential. They’re Black Sabbath albums, okay? That’s what they are. They sound like Black Sabbath albums. Wasn’t it interesting that Geezer Butler said Cross Purposes is the best album he’d ever played on? It is a truly remarkable album. But they all are: from Headless Cross, to Tyr (which I can now pronounce correctly), Cross Purposes, and Forbidden, which has been given a new lease of life. Seriously, it is incredible. Just stunning.
Thank you again to Tony Martin for joining me here on the Now Spinning Magazine podcast. Please keep spinning those discs, whether they are vinyl or CD. Check us out on the podcast. We’re on every platform you can think of, from Apple to Spotify to Amazon. Of course, we’re on YouTube. Please subscribe and check out the website at nowspinning.co.uk. Remember, music is the healer and the doctor. So take care and I’ll see you all very, very soon.
Watch the full interview here
Phil Aston Now Spinning Magazine

This weekend, I want to dive deep into a topic that’s close to my heart and crucial for anyone stepping into leadership roles or aiming for personal growth: Active Listening. It’s a term we often hear thrown around in workshops and seminars, but how many of us truly understand its power and practice it actively?
The Essence of Active Listening
Active listening is about fully immersing yourself in a conversation, not just hearing the words but understanding the emotions and intentions behind them. It’s a skill that requires patience, empathy, and a genuine interest in the speaker's perspective. For leaders, this is the bedrock of trust and meaningful connection within teams. It turns conversations into opportunities for growth, insight, and collaboration.
Why Active Listening Matters
Fosters Psychological Safety: When team members feel heard, they're more likely to open up, share innovative ideas, and express concerns. This environment encourages risk-taking and creativity, essential components of a thriving organization.
Enhances Decision Making: By understanding diverse perspectives, leaders can make more informed decisions that reflect the team’s insights and needs, leading to better outcomes.
Personal Growth: Active listening challenges us to reflect on our biases and assumptions. It’s a pathway to self-awareness and continuous personal development, encouraging us to question our views and grow.
How to Practice Active Listening
Full Presence: In our digital age, distractions are the norm. Commit to being fully present in conversations—put away your phone, close your laptop, and focus on the speaker.
Reflective Listening: Paraphrase or summarize what the speaker said to ensure you’ve understood correctly. This not only clarifies communication but also shows you’re engaged.
Ask Open-Ended Questions: Encourage deeper insights and discussion by asking questions that require more than a yes/no answer. This opens up the conversation for exploration and deeper understanding.
Active Listening as Self-Care
Interestingly, active listening isn’t just about improving as a leader or communicator; it’s also a form of self-care. In listening deeply to others, we often hear echoes of our own thoughts and feelings, offering us insights into our own inner workings and challenges. It’s a practice that, by fostering connection and understanding, protects against the isolation and burnout so common in high-pressure roles.
This Weekend’s Challenge
I encourage you to pick one conversation this weekend where you fully dedicate yourself to practicing active listening. Notice any differences in how the conversation flows, how the other person responds, and how you feel during and after the exchange.
If you’re reading this, consider it a gentle nudge to prioritize meaningful, real-world interactions this weekend. Your mental well-being—and those around you—will reap the benefits.
Let’s Connect
I’m here to grow this community, share insights, and learn from each other. What are your experiences with active listening? Have you noticed its impact in your professional or personal life? Share your stories, challenges, and successes below. Let’s embark on this journey of growth and understanding together.

Black Sabbath : Anno Domini : Deluxe Box Set Unboxing Review
Black Sabbath Anno Domini Box Set Review – Why the Tony Martin Years Were So Special
This set spans the period from 1989 to 1995 and includes some of the most underappreciated albums in Black Sabbath’s extensive catalog.
The “Anno Domini” box set is available in both CD and vinyl formats, each celebrate this unique era of Black Sabbath.
CD Box Set Four CDs: Newly remastered versions of “Headless Cross” (1989), “Tyr” (1990), “Cross Purposes” (1994), and a remixed “Forbidden” (1995). Tour Program Replicas: Includes a miniature version of the original tour book for “Headless Cross”. Softback Book: Filled with photos, artwork, and liner notes. It features a mix of new interviews and historical insights, providing a comprehensive look at this period. – The lyrics are not included. Bonus Tracks: Cloak and Dagger (Headless Cross) What’s The Use (Cross Purposes) Loser Gets it All (Forbidden) Poster: A reproduction of a vintage Black Sabbath tour poster.
Vinyl Box Set Four CDs: Newly remastered versions of “Headless Cross” (1989), “Tyr” (1990), “Cross Purposes” (1994), and a remixed “Forbidden” (1995) Each vinyl album pressed on high-quality vinyl, complete with polylined sleeves for protection. Tour Program – Full-size replica of the original Headless Cross tour program. 60-Page Softback Book: Similar to the CD version but in a larger, vinyl-sized format – this does include the lyrics and the inner sleeve details Poster: A large, fold-out poster included.
The Albums
Each album in this box set represents a significant chapter in Black Sabbath’s history, showcasing the versatility and creativity of the band during the Tony Martin years.
Headless Cross (1989): This album marked a major comeback for Black Sabbath, featuring Tony Martin on vocals, Tony Iommi on guitar, Cozy Powell on drums, Laurence Cottle on bass, and Geoff Nicholls on keyboards. It reached #31 on the UK Albums Chart and includes powerful tracks like “Devil & Daughter” and “When Death Calls”.
Tyr (1990): A concept album heavily influenced by Norse mythology, “Tyr” featured Tony Martin, Tony Iommi, Cozy Powell, Neil Murray on bass, and Geoff Nicholls. It peaked at #24 in the UK and includes standout tracks like “Anno Mundi” and “The Sabbath Stones”.
Cross Purposes (1994): This album saw the return of Geezer Butler on bass, alongside Tony Martin, Tony Iommi, Bobby Rondinelli on drums, and Geoff Nicholls. It reached #41 in the UK and features tracks like “I Witness” and “Virtual Death”.
Forbidden (1995): Often considered a misstep at the time, this album has been newly remixed and sounds significantly improved. The lineup included Tony Martin, Tony Iommi, Neil Murray, Cozy Powell, and Geoff Nicholls. Notable tracks include “Get a Grip” and “Kiss of Death”.
While the Tony Martin era albums didn’t achieve the same commercial success as some of the earlier Sabbath releases, they have garnered a dedicated following and are celebrated for their musicianship and innovation. “Headless Cross” and “Tyr” performed well in the UK charts, reflecting their importance in the band’s discography.
Overall, the “Anno Domini” box set is a must-have for Black Sabbath fans, particularly those who appreciate the Tony Martin years. Despite a few minor quibbles, such as the absence of inner sleeves in the vinyl set and the softback book format, the quality of the music and the presentation make this a worthy addition to any collection.
The remastering work is superb, breathing new life into these albums and ensuring they sound better than ever. Whether you choose the CD or vinyl version, you’ll be treated to a fascinating period of Black Sabbath’s history.
If you’re a fan of this era or just discovering it, I highly recommend grabbing this box set while you can. The limited production means it might not be around for long, so don’t miss out on the chance to own a piece of heavy metal history.
Phil Aston

Hey everyone! I was pleased by the overwhelming interest I got in my collection, as someone who has a passion for building soil and hunting beans for unique phenos the last 15 years. I am glad how many people appreciate true one of kind heirloom genetics!
Why am I getting rid of them? Simply put - I am trying to go the legit route and this state is making it beyond difficult. I need to recoup and regroup. Any support is much appreciated. I’ve waited my whole life for this.
Pricing - I updated below. Much of my collection is very hard to find one of kind stuff that is highly sought after. No random pollen chucking, true bred stabilized genomes. There’s a lot of history in that list as well if you’re someone who understands the genomics of the plant. You’ll see breeder, where they’re out of, the strain name, the cross and a little bit of history / description on some of it. Some very very special stuff. Pricing is either what I paid for it or a little more if it’s something special that’s not easy to find or not being bred anymore.
*Each strain is in original packaging stored in a curidor at a steady 52 degrees, no light, no humidity. I find this is the best way to store beans for long term storage and guaranteed high germination rates. I usually get 97-100% germ rate with my germination method which I will include on a printed out sheet for anyone who grabs any of my offerings. I want you to succeed and find something special - I cherish my collection and sad to see a lot of it go but you gotta do what you gotta do. I’d really like to see this stuff go to growers who care about the plant and preserving the uniqueness to it for years to come. Hope all of this helps
Here is the full list:
coasttocoastgenetics@gmail.com (get in touch)
{Regs}

~ Oni Seed Co (Maine) ~ 

Tropicanna Cookies F2 - Girl Scout Cookies x Tangie (multiple award winner) [R] 250 ~ Elev8 Seeds (Seattle, Washington) Tangerine Cookies - Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookies x Tangie [R] 120

~ Mountain Organics ~ 

Cosmic Lotus - Gonzo x TOVR (Thai, Afghan, Haze, Northern Lights) [R] 120 Maya - Acapulco Gold x Lotus [R] 120 Gold Rush - Colombian Gold x Lotus [R] 120 The One BC1 - 1976 Highland Thai x 1971 Kandahar Afghani [R] {Clackamus Coot} 150 {See Mountain Organics Genetics PDF (now MOB seeds) for more info on genetic lineages.} ~ MOB seeds (Mountain Organics) ~ Psyche - The One BC1 x The One BC1 (Afghani Hybrid) [R] 120 Eros - The One BC1 x The One BC1 (Thai Hybrid) [R] 120 The One BC2 - The One x The One BC1 [R] 120 Morpho (Blue Lotus F2) - Blue Gonzo x Lotus [R] 120 Blue Gonzo BC1 - Blue Gonzo x Blue Lotus [R] 120 {Blue Gonzo - The One x (Nevilles Haze x NL5) (blue pheno)}

~ Symbiotic Genetics / The Village (Sacramento, California) ~ 

Mimosa - Clementine x Purple Punch F2 [R] (multiple award winner) 200 Banana Punch - Banana OG x Purple Punch F2 [R] 200 Cherry Punch - Cherry AK47 x Purple Punch F2 [R] 200 Wedding Crashers - Wedding Cake x Purple Punch F2 [R] 200 Orangeade - Tangie x Purple Punch F2 [R] 200 Big Block - Motorbreath 15 x Purple Punch F2 [R] 200 {Purple Punch lineage - Larry OG x Granddaddy Purple}

~ Exotic Genetix - EG Mike (Washington) ~ 

{Over 50x Cannabis Cup Awards since 2008} Tina F2 - (Tina x Tina) Constantine x Triple OG [R] (multiple award winner) 200 Paradise Circus - Tropicanna Cookies x Tina [R] 200 Cookies & Creme - Mystery Cookies x Starfighter F2 [R] (multiple award winner) 250 Big Smooth - OG Blueberry x Cookies & Creme [R] 200 Scoops - (Gelato x Tina) x Cookies & Creme F2 [R] 200 Strawberries & Creme F2 - Strawberry x Cookies & Creme F2 [R] 250

~ Dying Breed Seeds - Shiloh Massive (Mendocino, California) ~ 

California Black Rozé - Rozé x OG eddy [R] 350 Red Rozé - Rozé x Adonai [R] 350 Sour Zkittlez - Zkittlez x Candy Zkittlez #3 x Adonai [R] 400 Watermelon Zkittlez - Watermelon Zum Zum #3 x OG Eddy [R] 400 {Zkittlez - Grape Ape x Grapefruit} {Adonai - (Russian Kush (LA Cut) x Silver Tooth (Super Silver Haze x Train Wreck)) x Sweet Tooth}

~ Humboldt Seed Company (Humboldt County, California) ~ 

Blueberry Muffin F5 - Purple Panty Dropper x Razzle Berry [R] 100 Purple Mountain Majesty F3 - Purple Train Wreck x Train Wreck x Blueberry Muffin [R] 100 Amethyst F3 - Purple Panty Dropper x Blueberry Muffin [R] 100 Mango Sherbert F3 - Mango Trees x Mango Kush x Sherbert [R] 100 {2018/2019 HSC Phenotype mega hunt - Best 0.1% selected out of 10k plants} Mango Trees F5 - Mango Kush x Humboldt OG x Jack Herer [R] 100 Banana Mango F3 - Mango Trees x Banana OG x Blueberry Muffin [R] 100 Magic Melon F3 - Mango Trees x Honeydew Melon x Mango Sherbert [R] 100 Pineapple Upside Down Cake F3 - PUDC BX3 x Pineapple Train Wreck x Cookie Monster [R] 100 {2019/2020 HSC Phenotype mega hunt - Best 0.1% selected out of 10k plants} Very Cherry - Old Timer Seed x Lemon Kush Bx3 [R] 100 Vanilla Frosting - Humboldt Frost OG x Humboldt Gelato Bx3 [R] 100

~ Gage Green Group (Detroit, Michigan) ~ 

Grateful Breath F2 - OGKB (OG Kush Breath) x Joseph OG [R] 400 5th Dimension - Out Of Body Experience x Synchronicity [R] 300 Guiding Light - Out Of Body Experience x Breathwork [R] 300 Luna Golden - High School Sweetheart 2 x Synchronicity [R] 300 Mo Lune Day - Motorbreath 15 x Breathwork [R] 300 {Out of Body Experience - (Skywalker OG x Grateful Breath) x Grateful Breath F2} {Synchronicity - Irene x Grateful Breath} {Breathwork - Mendobreath x Grateful Breath} {High School Sweet Heart - Cherry Pie Kush x Grateful Breath}

~ Dominion Seed Co - Duke Diamond (Virginia) ~ 

Stash Plant - The Puck (Skelly Hashplant) x Screaming Eagle [R] 140 Munson - Northern Lights #5 x Screaming Eagle [R] 140 Kough Drop - Strawberry Afghani x Screaming Eagle [R] 140 Free Bird - Headband x Screaming Eagle [R] 140 Shine Apple - Virginia Beach Afghani x Screaming Eagle [R] 140 Pine Bomb - Sensi Durban Poison x Screaming Eagle [R] 140 {Screaming Eagle lineage - Airborne g13 x (88 g13 Hashplant x Kandahar Afghani)} Granny Skunk - Virginia Beach Afghani x (Skelly Hashplant x SSSC Skunk #1) [R] 200 Local Skunk - Original Diesel x (Cuddlefish HP x Sour Diesel IBL) x (Skelly Hashplant x SSSC Skunk1) [R] 200 Sis Skunk - Chem Sister x (Skelly Hashplant x SSSC Skunk1) [R] 200

~ Lucky Dog Seed Co - SkunkVA (Virginia) ~ 

{Holder, Preserver, Sharer of the most elite / influential Chemdog cuts in existence.} Dog Patch - Chemdog 91 Bx2 x Chemdog D [R] 150 Hunza Valley 91 - Skelly Hashplant x Chemdog 91 Bx3 [R] 150 Road D.O.G. - Crossroad Chem x Chemdog 91 Bx2 [R] 150 Chem Fuego - Sour Band (Sour Diesel x Headband) x Chemdog 91 Bx3 [R] 150 Double Krush - Chem Krush x Chemdog 91 Bx2 [R] 150 Guerilla Fume - Silver Chem (Silverback OG x Chemdog 91) x Chemdog 91 Bx3 [R] 150 Bohemian Highway - Occidental Kush x Chemdog 91 Bx3 [R] 150 SkunkVA Chemdog 91 S1 - Chemdog 91 x Chemdog 91 [F] {Crossroad Chem - Chemdog 91 x SFV OG Kush Bx2 (Chem pheno)} {Chem Krush - Chemdog 91 x SFV OG Kush Bx2 (Kush pheno)} {Chemdog 91 lineage - Nepalese x Thai Landraces} Chemdog 91 is considered to be “the godfather” in cannabis genetics and has paved the way for some of the most popular strains in history such as Sour Diesel and OG Kush. Chemdog lineage can be found in most modern day hybrid genetics and these crosses are from there original seed stock - Original Skunk VA Chemdog 91 S1 gifted to me by Headies Gardens. Friend & Distributor of Skunk VA genetics Lucky Dog Seed Co.}

~ Green Bodhi (Eugene, Oregon) ~ 

{Intentional Horticultural ~ Mexican ~ Thai ~ Afghani} Hazy Kush - Hazy Kush x Hazy Kush Bx2 [R] (extremely unique genotype in Phylos Galaxy) 120 Hazy Dog - Dog Walker OG x Hazy Kush Bx2 [R] 120 Hazy Star - Stardawg x Hazy Kush Bx2 [R] 120 Hazy Sour - Sour OG x Hazy Kush Bx2 [R] 120 Hazy OG - OG Kush x Hazy Kush Bx2 [R] 120 Hazy Ghost - Ghost OG x Hazy Kush Bx2 [R] 120 Sour 78 (Tenzin Kush) - Sour OG x 78 LA Affie OG [R] (extremely unique genotype) 200 Dog Walker 78 - Dog Walker OG x (Sour OG x 78 LA Affie OG) [R] 150 Kosher 78 - Kosher Kush x (Sour OG x 78 LA Affie OG) [R] 150 SBSE 78 - Sour Best Shit Ever x (Sour OG x 78 LA Affie OG) [R] 150 Ancient Tenzin #2 - Tenzin Kush #2 x Ancient OG (72 Iranian x Snow Lotus) [R] 200 Ancient Tenzin #4 - Tenzin Kush #4 x Ancient OG (72 Iranian x Snow Lotus) [R] 200 {Hazy Kush lineage - Golden Pineapple x ((Trainwreck x Purple Affie) x (OG Kush x SAGE))}

~ Old World Genetics - DJ Short (Eugene, Oregon) ~ 

Newberry F5 - Blue Heaven F4 x DJ Short Blueberry F4 Male [R] 300 Velvet Krush F5 - FXW #4 Mother x DJ Short Blueberry F4 Male [R] 300 Blueberry F5 - Highland Thai x Afghani Indica [R] (first place indica cannabis cup 2000) 150 {Blueberry seeds are F4-F5 selectively bred from pure Landrace P1s since the 1970s. The mother for DJ Shorts Blueberry is over 20 years old - Selected in 1998 and rereleased in 2004.}

~ Dynasty Genetics - Professor P (Portland, Oregon) ~ 

Oregon Huckleberry IBL - Oregon Huckleberry F4 x Oregon Huckleberry Bx3 [R] 150 Mt. Hood Huckleberry F4 - Mt. Hood Huckleberry F3 x Mt. Hood Huckleberry F3 [R] 150 Huckleberry Kush V5 - Oregon Afghani x Oregon Huckleberry [R] 150 Crater Lake V6 - Super Silver Haze F2 x Oregon Huckleberry [R] 120 Alpenglow - Cherry Vanilla Cookies x Oregon Huckleberry 2017 #5 [R] 120 Blue Magoo Bx2 - Blue Magoo x Blue Heron #111 [R] 120 Salmon River OG - Pre 98 Bubba x Blue Heron #111 [R] 120 Birds Of Paradise - Kali Snapple x Blue Heron #111 [R] 120 Starduster - Pre-99 East Coast Sour Diesel x Ms. Universe (clone) [R] 120 {Kali Snapple - (Snowbud x Pineapple) x Kali Mist (Pre 2000)} {Ms. Universe - Dess*tar (Starship x Kali Mist) Mother x Space Queen F3 Farther} {Oregon Huckleberry - Oregon Blueberry (Blueberry X Temple Flo) X Morning Glory (Hawaiian x Afghani x Shiva Skunk)} {Blue Magoo - Oregon Blueberry F4 x Williams Wonder F2} {Blue Heron - Blue Magoo x Blue Magoo / Huckleberry}

~ Relic Seeds - Professor P (Portland, Oregon) ~ 

{Preservation of Rare Heirloom ~ Landrace ~ Unique CBD Varieties} Relic Grapefruit - Grapefruit IBL x Grapefruit F2 [R] 140 Durban Grapefruit - Durban Poison x Grapefruit F2 [R] 140

~ Massive Seeds (Rogue Valley Terroir, Southern Oregon) ~ 

{Bred, Grown and Harvested outdoor at 42.0 Latitude (Same Latitude as mid Hudson Valley) Some of the largest growing / biggest yielding plants on record with massive uniform nugs.} Pineapple Pomegranate F3 - Pomegranate x Applegate Hornblower [R] 140 Durban Pomegranate F2 - Durban Poison x Pineapple Pomegranate F3 [R] 140 Black Pomegranate - Pineapple Pomegranate F3 x South African Landrace [R] 140 Rogue Valley Wreck - Big Wreck x Blueberry Snow [R] 120 Summer Sunset OG - Purple Hindu Kush x Lemon Larry OG [R] 120 Mint Sunset - Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookies x Summer Sunset OG [R] 120 Purple Lemon Chem - Chem 91 x Summer Sunset OG [R] 120 Snow Skunk - Yuki Dog x Purple Lemon Chem [R] 120 Chem541 - Chem91 Bx1 x (Chem91 x Session Sour Diesel BX1) [R] 120 {Pomegranate - Shishkaberry x Blueberry x Oregon Snow x Lemon Pineapple} {Applegate Hornblower (Pineapple Trainwreck) - Mexican x Thai x Afghani}

~ Freeborn Selections - Mene Gene (Mendacino, California) ~ 

Piña F4 - Super Silver Haze x ((Dirt x Bigbud) x (Dirt x Purp) [R] 300 Sky Cuddler Kush F3 - PK x (Skywalker OG x (PK x (Hindu x Big Red) [R] 300 Lime Pop Kush F3 - OG x (PK x Black Lime) [R] 300 Cherry West Bx - Cherry West x (Cherry West x Cherry Limeade) [R] 300 {Thoroughly worked lines over at least 3-4 generations before released to the public.} {(Dirt x Bigbud) x (Dirt x Purp) and (Big Red) are 80s Afghani lines from Santa Cruz.} Black Lime Reserve F2 {Eclectic Elegance Preservation} - Northern Lights x Purple Kush x Chemdog Special Reserve [R]

~ Emerald Mountain Legacy - Mandelbrot Brothers Family Heirlooms {Ras Truth} ~ 

Royal Kush IX (Bx10) - (Sour Diesel x Highland Afghani) x Southern Humboldt Purple Kush [R] 350 Oil Spill (Bx5) - XXX OG x Royal Kush 7 [R] 300 Royal Spill - (XXX OG x Royal Kush 7) x Royal Kush 8 [R] 300 The Real Rozé - (Zkittlez x Royal Kush 7) x Royal Kush 8 [R] 300 Royal Limez - (Zkittlez x Black Lime Reserve) x Royal Kush 8 [R] 300 Royal Maui Berry - Diesel Maui Dawg x Blackberry Kush x Royal Kush 9 [R] 250 {Royal Kush genome is one of the most sought after stabilized / homogenized IBLs in existence from the heart of the Emerald Triangle in Northern California.}

~ Karma Genetics (Holland) ~ 

Biker Kush (Ha-OG Bx2) - Ha OG x Biker Kush V1 [R] 150 Sour Power OG - Sour Power (cup winning cut) x Biker Kush V1 [R] 150 Tha Melon - Melon x Biker Kush V1 [R] 150 Karma Sour Diesel Bx2 - Rez Sour D x (Rez Sour D x (Rez Sour D x Biker Kush v2)) [R] 350 Headbanger - Rez Sour D (KG cut) x Biker Kush V1 [R] {2013 Amsterdam Cannabis Cup 1st} 300 Josh D OG - SFV OG x Triangle Kush x Hells Angels OG [R] 300 {Real OG Kush Story - Josh D & Matt “Bubba” Berger began developing these genetics in Orlando, Florida back in 1991.} {Biker Kush v2 - Ha OG x (Ha OG x (Ha OG x SFV OG Bx2))} (cup winning genetics) {Sour Power - Starbud x East Coast Sour Diesel} (cup winning genetics) {Sour Diesel used in Karma Sour crosses is a KG cut of a Rez Sour D IBL selected in 2007}

~ Surfr Seeds (Pacific Northwest) 

Citrus Tsunami - Tropicana Cookies x Orange Zkittlez [R] 100 Island Zkittlez - Sour Strawberry x Orange Zkittlez [R] 100 North Shore - Mendo Purps x Orange Zkittlez [R] 100 Endless Summer - Purple Punch x Orange Zkittlez [R] 100 So Pitted - MAC1 x Orange Zkittlez [R] 100

~ Pacific North West Roots - Ras Kaya Paul (Washington) ~ 

Koffee F5 - Alien OG x Alien Kush {Rare Pacific Northwest Roots Hierloom IBL} [R] 300 Black Koffee - Black Dog Kush Bx4 x Koffee F5 [R] 300 Koffee & Donuts - Glazed Cherries F4 x Koffee F5 [R] 300

~ Green Source Gardens (Southern Oregon Heirlooms) ~ 

Pinkleberry Kush F5 {Mendacino Blackberry Kush Hierloom IBL} [R]

~ HBK Genetics ~ 

Chile Verde - Key Lime Pie x Lavender [R] 300 {Emerald Cup 2018 Winner - Best Personal Use} {Key Lime Pie - Durban Poison x Cherry OG x OG Kush} {Lavender - Super Skunk x Big Skunk Korean x Afghani Hawaiian}

~ Alien Genetics ~ 

Sour Apple IX (IBL) - Sour Apple IBL x Sour Apple IBL [R] 350

~ Mos_Cutty ~ 

Cherry AK 47 IBL (Original Serious Seeds stock) 250 {AK47 - Colombian x Mexican x Thai x Afghani} [R]

~ Motherlode Gardens (Yosemite, California) ~ 

Ancient OG F5 - 1972 Iranian Landrace x Snow Lotus {Bodhi Seeds Hierloom IBL} [R] 200

~ Twenty20 Genetics (Mendacino, California) ~ 

SFV OG Bx5 (SFV OG IBL) - San Fernando Valley OG Kush [R] 150

~ Elev8 Seeds (Seattle, Washington) 

Bruce Banner OG - OG Kush (Ghost Cut) x Strawberry Diesel [R] 140

~ Jaws Genetics ~ 

Fruity Pebbles OG IC1 - Fruity Pebbles OG F2 x Fruity Pebbles OG F1 [R] 200

~ OrgnKid / Zoolander ~ 

Banana OG F3 - OG Kush x Sagmartha strain [R] {Original Seed Stock} 200

~ GG Strains (Las Vegas, Nevada - RIP Joesy Whales) ~ 

Gorilla Glue #4 IBL (Original Glue) - GG4 x GG4 Bx6 [R] 300 {Original Seed Stock of Michigan / Los Angeles High Times Cannabis Cup Winner 2014 and High Times Jamaican World Cup Winner.}

~ FYG Tree (Santa Cruz, CA) ~ 

Black Rose F13 (Heath Robinson IBL) - Black Russian x Shiva Skunk (purple pheno) [R] 200 Shiva Skunk Bx - Shiva Skunk x Black Rose F12 [R]

~ AK Bean Brains (Anchorage, Alaska breeder and old school genetic preservationist holding beans & cuts for over 30 years from original Dutch Seedbank stocks.) ~ 

N L #1 x N L #5 [R] 100 TK/NL5 Haze - Triangle Kush x Northern Lights #5 [R] 100 (Northern Lights #1 x Big Skunk) x Northern Lights #1 [R] 100 (Big Skunk x Northern Lights #1) x Super Skunk [R] 100 95 Black Domina - Northern Lights x Ortega x Hash Plant x Afghani [R] 100 Black Domina Bx (Black Domina x Pacific Northwest Hash Plant) x Northern Lights #1 [R] 100 (Black Domina x Matanuska Thunder Fuck) x Northern Lights #1 [R] 100 Matanuska Thunder Fuck Bx3 - Alaska Thunder Grape x Dutch Thunder Fuck [R] 100 {Northern Lights was brought to Neville Schoenmakers in the Netherlands in 1985, where he worked the line before releasing it under “The Seed Bank of Holland” ~ NL #5 became the High Times Cannabis Cup Winner in 1989, 1990 and 1992 and is considered one of the most influential strains of all time. These seeds have been preserved in Alaska since the late 80s.}

~ The Nature Farm (Real NorCal Culture) ~ 

Cheddar Skunk V2 - 89’ UK Cheese (Exodus Cut) x Uncle Festers Skunk #18 IBL [R] 100 Hidden Hills Skunk - 94’ SFV OG x Uncle Festers Skunk #18 IBL [R] 100 Uncle Festers Skunk #18 IBL aka Skunkbud - Afghani Indica x Mexican Sativa (64’ Brick Weed) x Colombian Gold & Red [R] 100 {Original Hells Angels strain bred in 1964 by “Uncle Fester” an early 60’s psychologist turned outlaw. Authentic Original Skunk #1 lineage that is pre Skunkman. Preserved / held by family in Northern California over 3 generations.}

~ Doc D Seeds ~ 

Bandaid Haze ix 3.0 (Piff) - Cuban Black Haze x A5/Thai [R] 200 (2 packs) {These seeds originally came from a Spanish grower in the “A5 crew” out of Southern Holland. “A5” was short for their NL#5 x Haze A open Thai pollination project. These seeds were shared with legendary grower Bodhi, who found one male and used it to pollinate a cut of “Cuban Black Haze” that he had. The strain was referred to as “Piff” and the seeds were shared almost exclusively with Doc D. After running the seeds, Doc selected “Piff #7” and shared the cut back with Bodhi who further worked the line. The cut was a significantly better long flowering haze variety with a shorter flowering time than the Cuban Black Haze mother or A5 father. Bodhi then later referred to the strain as “Bandaid Haze” coining the term because he said “it heals all wounds” This genome has direct lineage to the New York Hazes (NYC Piff / Uptown Piff / Washington Heights Haze) of the 2000s without any of the paranoia/anxiety that came from many of the hazes from that era. Many world renowned breeders agree that most of the “New York Haze” and “New York City Piff” varieties are all just different cuts of the same strain, that most likely comes from an early selection of Neville Schoenmakers (NL#5 x Haze) which is often referred to as the “pinnacle of cannabis breeding” that has dominated cannabis scene from the 1980s in Holland to the present day.}
{Fems}

~ Mass Medical Strains (Massachusetts) ~ 

Star Pupil - Purple Thai x Afghan/Pakistan [F] 150 {High Times Flower of Month - Jan. 2017} Pu Tang - Star Pupil x Tangie [F] {High Times Top 10 Strains of 2019} 150 Grape Pupil - Pu Tang x Star Pupil [F] 150 Triangle Pupil - Triangle Kush x Star Pupil [F] 150 Bubba Pupil - Pre-98 Bubba Kush (Katsu Bluebird) x Star Pupil [F] 150 Nepali Blue - Nepalese White Mountain Charas Sativa Heirloom x Blue Magoo Bx2 [R] 200

~ Compound Genetics (Portland, Oregon) ~ 

Gelateria - Acai Berry Gelato x Jet Fuel Gelato [F] 150 Liquid Imagination - Blue Zkittlez x Jet Fuel Gelato [F] 150 Icicles - White Sherbet x Jet Fuel Gelato [F] 150 Petrol Rainbows - Sour Gelato 5 x Jet Fuel Gelato [F] 150 The Menthol S1 - The Menthol x The Menthol [F] 150 {Jet Fuel Gelato - Gelato 45 x (High Octane OG x Jet Fuel G6)} {The Menthol - Gelato 45 x (White Diesel x (High Octane x Jet Fuel G6))}

~ Phinest Cannabis (Sacramento, California) x Cannarado (Colorado) ~ 

PB Souffle - Dosidos x Lava Cake [F] 150 Lava Breath - Mendobreath F3 x Lava Cake [F] 150 Magma Cookies - Cuvee Cookies x Lava Cake [F] 150 {Lava Cake - Grape Pie x Thin Min Girl Scout Cookies} {First major genetic line released to public that was created from tissue culture / micropropagation - RIP Jai Malloy (founder of Phinest Cannabis)}

This might read more like a relationship advice post, so forgive me if this isn't the appropriate avenue, but I really need insight from people who have experienced this type of grief. This is a little long, so please bear with me.
10 months ago my wife and I (early 30s) lost our baby boy at 21 weeks due to TFMR. He was very much wanted and very much loved. It's been hard on both of us, but obviously my wife has been having a harder time. I've since returned to hobbies and friendships, but she has taken the route of isolation. Now, it feels like just about everyone we know is announcing pregnancies. Of course I'm reminded of what we should have and it makes me sad, but I'm also happy for those people and want to share in their joy. My wife, however, wants nothing to do with any of them. That's totally valid and she can do what she wants, but it does make sad that it feels like she's shut out most people in her life right now.
Just under two months ago, I told her that I was planning on attending my friends' baby shower. I've known these friends for almost 20 years, but she doesn't like them, and I try not to bring them up to her. I didn't expect her to be thrilled about me going, and I would certainly never expect her to go with me, but her reaction was far more explosive than I anticipated. She essentially forbade me from going as it would be too triggering for her and I was expected to know as much. The fact that I even brought it up told her I didn't care about her feelings and that I was putting my friends over her. If I decided to attend, she "would have to seriously think about our marriage". We had a huge fight but ultimately came to a compromise that I could take them to dinner in lieu of attending the shower. It was my understanding that the shower was the main sticking point and that anything after that was fine.
Just a couple days later, we found out we were pregnant again. Unfortunately, that joy was shortlived as we found out the pregnancy was ectopic after only two weeks. Thankfully we caught it early, and my wife's health is okay. The emotional pain isn't as severe as when we lost our son last year, but loss is loss, and the pain is still fresh. The baby shower came and went, and I wasn't in the mood to set up the dinner the time, so it never happened.
Fast forward another several several weeks and my friends have their baby. I inform my wife of the birth since I don't want her to get blindsided about it from somewhere else. She was upset I even told her, so I ask how to better navigate the situation to which she responds that I'm doing my best but she just wants them out of her life, by them "either moving away or dying." We fight again and it's apparently a problem that I got so hung up on her wording.
Almost two weeks later, I tell her I'm planning on visiting them. Again, I didn't expect her to be thrilled, but I thought we agreed everything sans baby shower was fine, and we even visited her sister's newborn shortly after our first loss, so I thought it would be more or less "okay". But her reaction was even more explosive than last time. My ears were ringing from the volume of her voice. More accusations of not giving a shit about her, putting everyone else above her, etc. Apparently during our last argument she said she'd need time after their birth, which is probably true but I'm sure I lost that detail among the heightened emotions. Once again she says she'd seriously rethink our marriage if I'm willing to ignore her feelings and visit them anyway. She says I can't see them until she's felt like she's processed the news of their birth. Not only that, I'm being told I'm not to acknowledge their existence or even text/talk on the phone with them if she's around. Since she's home all the time outside of work, my interactions with them are essentially to be limited to business hours. I ask how long this is supposed to last and she thinks it's unreasonable to ask for a timeframe on her healing, but maybe after we get back from a trip in two months at the earliest (which coincides with the anniversary of losing our son). She feels like she's being generous by even giving me an estimate.
She says she shouldn't be asked to sacrifice the progress she's made, but I feel like I'm the one being asked to make a sacrifice. I recognize that these things are triggering for her but I don't feel like it's my responsibility to help her avoid feeling this way by me not engaging in these big life moments. I've suggested that she get back into therapy but she says she's working through it on her own just fine and it's insulting to suggest that therapy is required to navigate her feelings. I've also suggested we get back into couples counseling but since she doesn't even want to acknowledge these friends and this situation, she says talking about it will only delay her healing.
I feel so lost. And like I'm in a box, with the walls slowly moving inward, crushing me. My friends are important to me and I want to celebrate these big moments in their lives, but I think I will lose my wife if I do so. She says there are other ways to celebrate them without being there in person, and if people who don't live close to each other can still celebrate and maintain friendships, I can too. Except these friends only live 20 minutes away. She says she'd never ask me to cut them out of my life but it feels like the goalposts keep moving closer and closer in that direction. How can I be sure that she won't change her mind about this in two months? Another close friend that I've known for even longer will be going through IVF in August and I'm terrified of how my relationship with them will be impacted if it's successful (at least she likes this friend).
I don't know what to do. We've both gone through something awful, but I'll never know the feeling of losing a child that I was carrying in my body. I know she's grieving (as I am still too), and I'm trying to be empathetic to that grief, but I think too much is being asked of me and I'm becoming resentful. She doesn't care if what she's asking is logical or not, she's my wife and she says I should put her first. I should just do it because she's asking. I want to reiterate that I think it's totally valid to have these feelings and I'm not trying to diminish them or try to get her to not feel them, but these feelings are now affecting me and my friendships. I also realize I'm presenting my biased view of events, but I'll try to answer questions if there are any.
Has anyone been through a similar loss and have any insight to give here? Am I not giving her enough grace during this time of pain?

May got out to a lightning start for me, continuing the torrid April pace for a while before cooling off a bit in the back end of the month. That's partially by design, as I jumped into a pair of longer games (one enormously so) which I won't finish until deeper into June, but I've also noticed I'm slowly bleeding gaming time from my evenings. As my kids get incrementally older and the days grow incrementally longer entering summer, an hour that would previously be my own is now deferred to them, and that adds up over the course of an entire month.
Not that I'd trade my kids, you understand.
(Games are presented in chronological completion order; the numerical indicator represents the YTD count.)
​
​
#27 - Contra: Hard Corps - GEN - 8/10 (Great)
It's been fascinating to watch the Contra series evolve over time, and Hard Corps on the Sega Genesis is no different. With no Mode 7 (the SNES' proprietary isometric viewpoint mode) available on the system, necessarily some of the top down content from Contra III would need to be altered or removed, and that begged the question of what would take its place: after all, a return to basic sidescrolling action might feel like a big step down, and we can't have that. So I think I expected Hard Corps to throw in a new wrinkle to keep the formula a bit more fresh. What I did not expect was for it to make three enormous changes.
For one, Hard Corps has four different characters to choose from, and each is actually unique. It's not just the look - where else can you play a cybernetic wolfman? - but they've got different sizes and hurtboxes as well. And while each starts with the same basic low power machine gun, each has a completely different loadout of possible weapon upgrades, ensuring that all four play very differently from one another outside of the fundamentals of movement. To that end, the two weapon toggle of Contra III is expanded in Hard Corps, allowing you to hold all four of your upgraded weapons simultaneously and switch between them at will, which adds a new layer of depth and strategy to the action. Building upon this notion of enhanced player choice even further, the second big change is that the game has branching paths. After the first stage you make a choice that determines where you head for the second level, and then later on you make another choice that creates further divergence, such that the game has four main endings (and a secret fifth!), all with their own dedicated unique stages. It's for that reason possibly the most replayable game so far in the franchise; I myself did a run through of each ending using a different character per run to get a feel for them all.
This leads to the final big change, which is the only one I don't regard a resounding success: the entire game is basically a boss rush. Let's zero in on the main path that I followed on my primary playthrough and add up all mini-bosses and full boss phases. What number might you expect that to come out as? A dozen or so? Well, sorry about your naiveté, but the answer is 43: it's bosses all the way down. This is a MUCH more mentally taxing load than previous Contra games where you could kind of skate through the non-boss sections with good fundamentals. And that's just one of four possible paths through the game! It's absurd! It's also way more fun than it sounds it would be from the description, but I've heard people say Hard Corps is the toughest Contra game and now I know why. I do miss just running and gunning and dropping dudes in one hit before a thrilling finale; it's hard to be properly wowed by a boss fight when that's all you ever see. But nevertheless Contra: Hard Corps is lives up to the legacy of greatness the franchise had up until that point established...just steel yourself mentally for the extensive memorization it requires of you.
​
#28 - Ancient Enemy - PC - 5.5/10 (Semi-Competent)
Solitaire is one of those games that nobody really wants to play. It’s a game of convenience and opportunity, only attractive in the absence of something better, which is to say “nearly anything else at all.” Slightly more entertaining are variations on the form, such as Mahjong Solitaire or Free Cell, where certain cards/tiles are locked until the ones above them have been cleared away. These are still just time wasting games for people with nothing else to do, but when presented as a discrete set of challenges there’s a bit more appeal. Do you know they say that every one of the 32,000 numbered games of FreeCell on classic Windows operating systems was supposedly beatable? Did you know a very bored teenage me once decided to see if I could prove it by playing and beating every single unique game of FreeCell in order? I got into the low 30s or so before I questioned what the hell I was doing with my life and wisely moved on.
Well, Ancient Enemy is a game for people with nothing better to do, masquerading as a game that would qualify as "something better to do." It’s an RPG, I guess, but the gameplay revolves entirely around a solitaire variant. You have a deck of “stock cards” numbered 0-9 and start each encounter (“hand”) by flipping the top one. Then on the board you have to collect a card with a number adjacent to the one you’re displaying - 0 serving as a bridge between 1 and 9. Getting a card reveals any card trapped immediately below it and enables that card to be collected as well. If you can’t make a move, you can flip a new stock card over to get a random new number until your deck runs out. Some levels are simple puzzles in this vein, trying to clear all the cards from the board. Most encounters though are battles, where you do the exact same thing, except the color of the card you collect enables you to attack, defend, or cast a spell. So it’s turn-based combat, except each turn is you basically clearing as many cards as you can from the board to juice up your attack or bolster your defense, and that’s about it.
Now, at first, this is actually way more fun than I’m making it sound. I mean, I like solitaire type games for what they are, and the extra mechanics definitely do enrich the experience. You get consumable wild cards, battle boards have bonus cards with instant benefits, you get powers that manipulate the board, new types of cards appear, all good stuff. The problem is that the game completely runs out of these new ideas about a quarter of the way through, at which point you’re just going through the motions until the end, accompanied by a complete nothing of a story that I was confident I had figured out, only to find that the ending was somehow worse than the cliche I’d been anticipating. Thus, the game sadly settled into that exact same niche of games it was supposed to improve upon and supplant. Which I suppose is ok…if you’ve got nothing better to do.
​
#29 - Snakebird Primer - PC - 7/10 (Good)
I follow a general rule of always playing game franchises in order, but Snakebird Primer is a unique case wherein the developers of the original Snakebird decided that it was too off-putting to new players, and so they made a sequel that they explicitly wanted newcomers to play first. A "primer" in truth to ease you into the overall Snakebird challenge, as it were. So when I decided to check out Snakebird, I thought all right: just this once I'll do it your way.
So how does Snakebird Primer shake out? Well...it's fine. It's a jaunty kind of puzzle game, with bright colors, friendly art and music, and general good vibes. In each stage you control one or more segmented "snakebirds" and have to get them all to the rainbow portal to complete the level. Sometimes you need to eat fruit to open the portal as well, but that's the entire game in a nutshell. It's a very simple concept, complicated only by the fact that a snakebird that has no body segments touching the ground will fall, and so each stage is a kind of pathing challenge, tasking you to figure out the right order of operations to reach the end. The levels are very well paced and designed if you just go in order: there aren't any hand-holdy tutorials, but new ideas are introduced organically at various intervals, and the challenge always feels reasonable, especially because you can undo any number of moves at will, like stepping through code to find an error.
There is, however, a significant difficulty spike for the last couple levels, which is pretty jarring. And when you add to that the fact that the designer of Baba Is You said he built a lot of his design philosophy around the original Snakebird, I've got to admit I'm a lot less keen on checking that one out. It's in that same realm of "enter these six dozen commands in precisely the right order" that made Baba Is You eventually feel more tedious and frustrating to me than anything else, so I think for now I'm happy to have just played the "lite" version instead.
​
#30 - It Takes Two - PS4 - 8.5/10 (Excellent)
When trying to write down a genre for It Takes Two in my tracking spreadsheet, I wanted to put "Yes". It's as though the developers wanted to make a bunch of different kinds of games and, rather than accepting any limitations (self-imposed or otherwise), they just found a way to do it all at once. It Takes Two is a platformer. It's a third-person shooter. It's a puzzle game. It's a rhythm game. It's a racing game. It's a stealth game. It's a boss battling action adventure. It's a minigame collection. It's a romantic comedy. It's an exploration playground. One minute you're flying around on a jetpack chucking Captain America shields at devils and the next you're literally playing a timed game of chess. None of the things that It Takes Two does would be characterized as masterpiece forms of their respective genres, but that's not the point. There's sufficient depth and development of each mechanic that it never feels like a lazy tack-on to check a box - and that in itself is beyond impressive - but it's the sheer number of different ideas tossed into this package that make it truly special.
It's hard for me to even review this game, frankly. Part of that is because I feel a strong bias towards the game for the audaciousness of what it tries to achieve, and for the way it inspires me to keep stretching myself in new ways however I can. But it's also hard because I don't remember the whole thing. It Takes Two is both fresh in memory, having just finished it, and yet far away and mingled in my mind with similar bits of similar other adventures (Tearaway foremost among them). Why is that? Well, I first booted up It Takes Two in May of 2022 as a co-op experience to share with my wife - quite fitting, as it turns out, given the nature of the game's plot of trying to reconcile an embattled couple. We'd only play in smaller bursts of 1-2 hours at a time, but every session we played it felt like we were playing a new, different game. Music to my ears, but much harder on my gaming-challenged wife, who took longer to adjust to each mechanical shift. Pretty soon we were playing less and less often, even as I was playing a game like Tearaway early on that occupied some similar design space in my head. Soon we stopped playing at all. When I tried to suggest resuming this title over the past year, I was repeatedly rebuffed until finally a month ago I managed to wear her down enough that we picked it up again for about an hour a week. So it is that the first half of the game is fuzzy and nebulous to me, even as I recall that I loved playing, whereas the back half is much fresher, and it's nigh impossible for me to separate my wife's frequent frustrations from my own experience - especially since I've been playing on a controller experiencing heavy stick drift, so managing the camera was a nightmare through no fault of the game's.
All that said, how could I not recommend this game? It's best played with two experienced gamers, but the story only fully lands if you play as a couple, so there's a bit of potential for a disconnect there, as I experienced. It's not a perfect game. But it is an incredibly ambitious one that had me routinely grinning from ear to ear, despite the grumblings on the couch next to me. When I pointed out to my wife that we finished the game in May 2024, almost to the day when we started back in '22, she said "They should've called it It Takes Two Years." We're both glad it's over, but I think for very different reasons.
​
#31 - Rogue Legacy 2 - PS5 - 7/10 (Good)
Some game sequels try to really shake things up and try something different from the one before. Final Fantasy is probably the biggest and most obvious example of this, but you can also see it in virtually every Super Mario Bros. game, in the Castlevania series, and the list goes on extensively from there. On the other hand, some game sequels treat their predecessors like rough drafts to be perfected. With these, the idea is to take the vision for the previous game, use the increase in time/budget/developer expertise now available, and try to execute on it more completely than was possible before. When a game like this is successful, there becomes almost zero reason to ever play the original game (other than possibly its story), because the new version has replaced it entirely as the definitive experience.
Rogue Legacy 2 is one of these latter types of games. Everything from the first game is pretty much still there (bosses excepted): enemies, basic combat and room design, character classes, traits, progression, etc. It immediately feels like "Hey, I've played this before," yet a cursory look reveals a huge wealth of additional content over the first game. Classes are better differentiated, you get new weapons, more spells, special abilities, new items, new upgrades, new explorable regions, new mechanics, new new new. It truly is a total replacement for Rogue Legacy 1 in this regard, a "go ahead and uninstall that thing forever because we've got it all right here and then some" type of mission statement. I was amazed at how I kept finding ever more avenues of progression and discovery, even many hours into the game, In fact, I never did manage to play as every class, and each class has a variant form as well, most of which I didn't even unlock. It's overflowing with stuff.
And I think that's why it didn't work quite as well for me as the first game: it's all too much. Now there are four different types of currency, all acquired in different ways, all for different upgrade paths. You're always competing with yourself on what to level up between runs because there are too many choices and all of them seem pretty good, but as you're finding your early groove the game throws a big wrench in there: labor costs. While each upgrade has a set gold cost that increases as you level it up, early on the game adds a universal tax mechanic to the entire upgrade tree, making it increasingly prohibitive to spend your money on stuff, and it feels awful. Rogue Legacy 1 had a similar system where each upgrade cost 10g more than the previous, but in the sequel these escalate far more rapidly, to the point where you'll complete a huge run and still feel like you can only afford one or two upgrades that barely move the needle. It's a pure inflationary grinding system meant to pad playtime, and I'm not about that. I played RL1 through multiple New Game + levels, but I was thrilled to beat RL2's final boss and move on because the economy is so frustrating. Other than that though, it's got quite a lot going for it.
​
#32 - Undertale - PS4 - 7/10 (Good)
When is some information too much information? Undertale is notorious for its rabid fan community insisting that there is only one "right" way to play the game, and so if you've ever heard of Undertale there's a good chance you already know what that preferred method is: pacifism. Undertale takes a unique approach to the JRPG in two primary ways: first, that defending against enemy attacks is an active system pretty much akin to dodging in a bullet hell game, and second that you almost never actually need to choose the "Fight" command from the battle menu in order to succeed in an encounter. The argument from the community is that you must play in this fully pacifist manner, largely because of a design decision that thoroughly punishes players who do not, only revealed after the game's conclusion. Thus, these players are "helping" curious newcomers by saving them from falling victim to a fairly vindictive design choice that would create a lot of frustration.
The problem with that approach is that Undertale makes it abundantly clear from the outset that you have the option for these alternative combat approaches, trains you on how to use them, and then gives you a positive feedback loop for choosing that direction with your gameplay. Which means the discourse surrounding this game effectively undermines not only the game's own ability to surprise and educate you, but also the authorial intent of that same design decision, which in context is a conscious player decision to go against the grain and suffer the possible consequences of doing so. In short, I wish I'd never heard of Undertale before I played it, as I'm sure I would've had a much better time.
As it stands, Undertale is still a highly creative take on the genre that, despite an aesthetic I didn't care for and writing that leaned a bit too hard at times into "lol I'm so random" territory for my tastes, still managed to get me invested with some of its characters and even make me laugh aloud at times. I was particularly impressed with that aforementioned approach to combat, as each enemy introduced unique hazards to avoid, so fighting a new monster was far more exciting here than in a standard turn-based RPG where the only meaningful question is "How much damage did this whatever move do to me?" So for those reasons I applaud Undertale. Even still, there's a lot of walking back and forth with no major purpose beyond "it was decided the game should be a little bit inconvenient here," adding some unnecessary tedium to the mix. In short, Undertale's a generally good time, but if you want it to be even better, just pretend you haven't read anything I just said.
​
#33 - Marvel's Spider-Man: Miles Morales - PS5 - 7.5/10 (Solid)
2018 was a big year for Miles Morales. In the fall he showed up in the PS4 title Marvel's Spider-Man as a major supporting character, and by the end of the year he was stunning cinema audiences in the fantastic Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse as the primary protagonist. It's no surprise then that by 2020, with his brand so hot, Sony and Insomniac Games would cash in with a follow-up title to the hit PS4 game with Miles front and center. And for the most part, the game is what you'd expect it to be from that basic pitch: more of the same from 2018, only focusing on Miles' family, his new home of Harlem and its people, and his path to becoming a fully fledged hero in his own right. That's all fine, but here's the problem: all of it has been done better before, and recently to boot. Miles' story of personal growth and family drama was handled better in the Spider-Verse series, even though MSM:MM wisely walks chooses to walk some different beats along the way. "Superhero of Harlem" was done masterfully by Netflix with the Luke Cage series (the first season, at least) back in 2016, and MSM:MM doesn't even try to address any issues beyond the most surface level. And the "more of the same" gameplay?
Well, admittedly that's still pretty good. Web swinging is as fun as ever to the point that there's an XP challenge to web swing at high speed for a full cumulative hour of real time and I caught myself thinking, "Hmm, maybe..." There are fast travel points that unlock relatively early on, but the joy of traversal feels like the main point of the game, so why would you bother? Miles also gets some new Spidey moves related to his bio-electric powers, and these are really fun and impactful to pull off, such that "more of the same" isn't in this case a damning phrase. And yet, it's also distinctly not "more, but better." In order to emphasize your new powers, the goons you fight (now including women for the first time I can recall ever seeing in a superhero game like this) have upgraded their own abilities as well, which means the simple pleasure of chaining big combos is a bit diminished. Maybe this enemy just blocks all your basic attacks and stops you cold. Maybe this one turns the tables to dodge and counter you. Or maybe you're just constantly surrounded by a flood of dudes with guns and rocket launchers and you feel like you never get a chance to press "punch" without being thoroughly punished.
Now add to that the game's relatively brief length and general lack of meaningful activities compared to its predecessor, as well as its truly awful villains and the ho-hum plot that they service, and you've got a title that's decidedly a step back from what came before. Of course, what came before was excellent, so even a step back still lands you in territory that's quite fun to play around with. My 6-year-old summed it up best when he came downstairs to ask me a question one day and caught me playing: "Whoa...how are you Spider-Man?!" Which is to say that Marvel's Spider-Man: Miles Morales is a game that really makes you feel like a wannabe Spider-Man who hasn't gotten it all figured out just yet. And I guess that's all right.
​
Coming in June:

• I've had less time for PC gaming lately for a couple of different reasons, but I'm expecting that to be a temporary thing, and I don't think I'm in danger of failing to finish Mass Effect 3 by the end of June. I didn't realize the version of the game I had included all the DLC. Nor did I actually know what any of the DLC was. So I was quite a ways into the game and feeling great about my progress when I got suspicious that the section I was playing wasn't actually base game content. I looked it up and found that, in fact, about 90% of what I'd played to date was DLC and I'd barely actually started the base game itself. That explains why the main story was taking a while to get off the ground, at any rate.
• Speaking of getting off the ground, my journey through The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom began impatiently a few months after release, but I took an extended break from the game and have now spent pretty much all of May continuing my thorough trek through the game world. I'm well over 200 hours into the game and am only several days away from having explored the entirety of the game's map. At which point I believe I'll finally advance the main quest past its initial stage.
• In my review for Rogue Legacy 2 above I mentioned the Castlevania franchise, which I feel I can speak to as a whole given that I've finished nearly every game in the series to date. Unsurprisingly I felt most drawn to the metroidvania style games, so there was a layer of disappointment in exhausting the last of those to discover. Disappointment that will soon be temporarily eradicated when I boot up Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night, produced by that same creative mind.
• And more...

​
​

← Previous	2024	Next →

This might read more like a relationship advice post, so forgive me if this isn't the appropriate avenue, but I really need insight from people who have experienced this type of grief. This is a little long, so please bear with me.
10 months ago my wife and I (early 30s) lost our baby boy at 21 weeks due to TFMR. He was very much wanted and very much loved. It's been hard on both of us, but obviously my wife has been having a harder time. I've since returned to hobbies and friendships, but she has taken the route of isolation. Now, it feels like just about everyone we know is announcing pregnancies. Of course I'm reminded of what we should have and it makes me sad, but I'm also happy for those people and want to share in their joy. My wife, however, wants nothing to do with any of them. That's totally valid and she can do what she wants, but it does make sad that it feels like she's shut out most people in her life right now.
Just under two months ago, I told her that I was planning on attending my friends' baby shower. I've known these friends for almost 20 years, but she doesn't like them, and I try not to bring them up to her. I didn't expect her to be thrilled about me going, and I would certainly never expect her to go with me, but her reaction was far more explosive than I anticipated. She essentially forbade me from going as it would be too triggering for her and I was expected to know as much. The fact that I even brought it up told her I didn't care about her feelings and that I was putting my friends over her. If I decided to attend, she "would have to seriously think about our marriage". We had a huge fight but ultimately came to a compromise that I could take them to dinner in lieu of attending the shower. It was my understanding that the shower was the main sticking point and that anything after that was fine.
Just a couple days later, we found out we were pregnant again. Unfortunately, that joy was shortlived as we found out the pregnancy was ectopic after only two weeks. Thankfully we caught it early, and my wife's health is okay. The emotional pain isn't as severe as when we lost our son last year, but loss is loss, and the pain is still fresh. The baby shower came and went, and I wasn't in the mood to set up the dinner the time, so it never happened.
Fast forward another several several weeks and my friends have their baby. I inform my wife of the birth since I don't want her to get blindsided about it from somewhere else. She was upset I even told her, so I ask how to better navigate the situation to which she responds that I'm doing my best but she just wants them out of her life, by them "either moving away or dying." We fight again and it's apparently a problem that I got so hung up on her wording.
Almost two weeks later, I tell her I'm planning on visiting them. Again, I didn't expect her to be thrilled, but I thought we agreed everything sans baby shower was fine, and we even visited her sister's newborn shortly after our first loss, so I thought it would be more or less "okay". But her reaction was even more explosive than last time. My ears were ringing from the volume of her voice. More accusations of not giving a shit about her, putting everyone else above her, etc. Apparently during our last argument she said she'd need time after their birth, which is probably true but I'm sure I lost that detail among the heightened emotions. Once again she says she'd seriously rethink our marriage if I'm willing to ignore her feelings and visit them anyway. She says I can't see them until she's felt like she's processed the news of their birth. Not only that, I'm being told I'm not to acknowledge their existence or even text/talk on the phone with them if she's around. Since she's home all the time outside of work, my interactions with them are essentially to be limited to business hours. I ask how long this is supposed to last and she thinks it's unreasonable to ask for a timeframe on her healing, but maybe after we get back from a trip in two months at the earliest (which coincides with the anniversary of losing our son). She feels like she's being generous by even giving me an estimate.
She says she shouldn't be asked to sacrifice the progress she's made, but I feel like I'm the one being asked to make a sacrifice. I recognize that these things are triggering for her but I don't feel like it's my responsibility to help her avoid feeling this way by me not engaging in these big life moments. I've suggested that she get back into therapy but she says she's working through it on her own just fine and it's insulting to suggest that therapy is required to navigate her feelings. I've also suggested we get back into couples counseling but since she doesn't even want to acknowledge these friends and this situation, she says talking about it will only delay her healing.
I feel so lost. And like I'm in a box, with the walls slowly moving inward, crushing me. My friends are important to me and I want to celebrate these big moments in their lives, but I think I will lose my wife if I do so. She says there are other ways to celebrate them without being there in person, and if people who don't live close to each other can still celebrate and maintain friendships, I can too. Except these friends only live 20 minutes away. She says she'd never ask me to cut them out of my life but it feels like the goalposts keep moving closer and closer in that direction. How can I be sure that she won't change her mind about this in two months? Another close friend that I've known for even longer will be going through IVF in August and I'm terrified of how my relationship with them will be impacted if it's successful (at least she likes this friend).
I don't know what to do. We've both gone through something awful, but I'll never know the feeling of losing a child that I was carrying in my body. I know she's grieving (as I am still too), and I'm trying to be empathetic to that grief, but I think too much is being asked of me and I'm becoming resentful. She doesn't care if what she's asking is logical or not, she's my wife and she says I should put her first. I should just do it because she's asking. I want to reiterate that I think it's totally valid to have these feelings and I'm not trying to diminish them or try to get her to not feel them, but these feelings are now affecting me and my friendships. I also realize I'm presenting my biased view of events, but I'll try to answer questions if there are any.
Has anyone been through a similar loss and have any insight to give here? Am I not giving her enough grace during this time of pain?

I have seen fair share of rom-coms from the past decade and Golden Time was in my PTW for quite a long time, finally got some time and decided to watch it. Initial premise was fascinating, characters being in college was something refreshing and cast seemed interesting. But I couldn't be more wrong, everything went downhill in the second half and weird ass ending soured everything about the story.
First of all the entire ship of Koko and Banri seemed so toxic, she changes her opinions over everything instantly and never seem to be on a right track. But above all her constant yelling was just difficult to watch. I can understand the author using it as a flaw to make her a better character but it didn't work for me and felt more like half hearted attempt which didn't get proper conclusion. [Spoilers]I just hated how Koko broke up with Banri, author depicts them as adults who can solve their issued with mutual understanding and talking it out, how she trusts Banri but everything was all of a sudden gone and she started treating him as a friend with no proper reason to him. Like what happened to her character growth.
Secondly, characters gets some role but they never get to finish their part of the story. It's like the story is filled with poor plot twists and piror story gets forgotten due to that. This show has a lot of arguments but never seem to conclude in a proper way. For Instance [spoilers]How Linda and Mistuo all of a sudden became friendly especially how Linda wasn't comfortable with Mitsuo, Oka being mad at Banri then it got resolved easily, Mitsuo having heated argument with Banri but everything is fine with laughs and how the story main plot twist was solved with a single mail. Why does Linda suddenly choose to confess "Yes" to Banri as he's running to meet Kouko? Why does his original personality even come back when it chose to let go? Everything happens so quickly in this series and it breaks all the tension.
Lastly, I felt extremely cheated by this series, because they spend so much time "developing" the characters. But by the end, everything is solved magically. All the solution to their problems doesn't come by hardships but it comes magically, through spontaneous and sudden laughter and tears. Absolutely ridiculous, they took 20 epsiodes to make you believe that these issues are present in the story but nothing ever mattered. I was planning to watch Sakurasou, but for some reason went with Golden Time. Hopefully Sakurasou will heal me from the frustrating experience.
I'd love to know their opinions about Golden time and if I am the only one who felt like that with GT.