I met “H” through our mutual friend group in August and he was very persistent and flirty and made his interest in me known immediately. He would constantly ask me about what my type was, my love life, what type of guys I was into, etc. I was seeing someone at the time, so I would brush off his attempts to flirt and his advances. He would always ask me to hang out (which I declined) and would text me whenever there was a group hangout to ask if I would be there.
When things ended with the guy I was seeing, I would vent to “H” about about the situation and one day “H” asked me how I felt about him and if I saw him as more than a friend. I told him that I wasn’t over the guy I was seeing and I wanted to get to know him as a friend first because I want to build an emotional connection first before building a sexual one (because I kept meeting guys that only wanted sex and not a relationship). I let him know upfront that I was looking for a relationship and that I didn’t do anything casual.
One day he sent me a risqué meme that I was put off by and I asked him what he wanted from me (whether his intentions were to pursue and relationship or if he just wanted a fuck buddy). He said that he didn’t know me well enough to know if he wanted to pursue a relationship (as he was still getting to know me) and felt like I would be able to emotionally handle a fuck buddy situation (so he wasn’t interested in that).
One day, he invites me over to his house and I ask him to make actual plans outside of his house and in advance. He invites me to see a movie and we go back to his house. We have sex and I discuss his intentions and he said that he only sees me as a fuck buddy and not someone that he would actually date. He said that he would never just invite a woman he would want to date to his house and he would actually make plans to go out and do things with her. I asked him why he couldn’t see himself dating me and he said that it was because I’m not confident. He also gave me dating advice. I ended things with him.
Three days later, he starts messaging me again as if nothing happened and I ignore his message. The next day, I saw him at a mutual friend’s house and he cornered me and complained that I was giving him the cold shoulder and that we needed to talk. I ignored him and he called me three times in a row after we left our friend’s house. The next day, I texted him and asked what he needed to talk about. He said that he wanted to get a “temperature check” on things between us. I was confused because I thought that I was clear about not being willing to be in a fuck buddy situation. When we talked, he said that I never told him that I was looking for a relationship (although I know for certain that I did). He also said that he still wanted to get to know me and he wanted to actually go out and do things together. So, I’m thinking that we are now on the same page, dating, and working towards something.
We spend the weekend together, going out (with PDA), sleeping over, making breakfast, cuddling, kissing, and having sex. Then he suddenly starts giving me dating advice, showing me photos of women he’s attracted to and has DM’d, and talking about what he’s looking for in the “next woman he talks to”. He randomly gets a call from someone (and I catch that it is a woman’s name) and he takes the call and rushes downstairs. He comes back upstairs over explaining things and how it was one of his “boys”. I somehow made an excuse to leave. Before I left, he told me to let him know if I’m catching feelings. This blew me because I thought that this was more than a fuck buddy situation.
I went through his followers on IG and found the woman that called him. It turns out they have been seeing each other since (at the latest) April of last year (although he told me that he was single and not sleeping with anyone else). Due to this fact, along with the fact that he clearly doesn’t want more, and the fact that he took the condom off during the last time we had sex (despite me telling him that I’m not on birth control and constantly reminding him to do so) I blocked him on everything. After blocking him, he tried to follow me multiple times on alternate accounts and looked me up on LinkedIn.
Last week, I went to a house party and he was there. He said nothing to me and I was relieved. That Sunday, I noticed that my car was making knocking noises, so I decided to take it to the mechanic. On the way to the mechanic, one of my front tires came off while I was driving. When I had the car towed to the mechanic, the mechanic asked was anyone mad at me and said that it looks like someone loosened the lug nuts on my car. I’m not sure if he did it, but I do find it interesting that this happened the day after the house party and he is keeping tabs on me via LinkedIn.
Despite the fact that he has proven that he is awful and not someone I’d want a relationship with, it still sucks that someone who chased me down only saw me as a fuck buddy/side chick. I’m constantly comparing myself to her and wondering why he saw her as girlfriend material and only saw me as a fuck buddy.

Michael Cera is walking down the hall of his school when a school shooting starts...
He and some of his classmates find a room to hide in.
While they're all hiding, crouched behind desks (listening to the screams and gun shots outside), Cera sees a girl among them that he has a crush on, "hot girl #1",
She starts looking over in his direction.
She makes a hand motion for him to come over towards her.
So Michael Cera smiles nervously and starts moving over.
But then as he does, another hot girl (hot girl #2) crawls past him, and he realizes that it was actually HER that hot girl #1 was summoning.
They both glare at him as a result of seeing his mistake.
hot girl 1 (whispering): "ugh, GROSS! like i would EVER want to hide from a shooter with YOU!"
hot girl 2 (whispering): "um...AWK-waaaaarrrrrrrrrrrd...."
but then the shooter walks into their room and shoots the hot girls first. their heads explode.
the shooter kills everyone else in the classroom too, except michael cera.
the shooter instead walks over to michael cera, like a zombie.
michael cera just sits there like a dear (not a typo) in the headlights, screaming.
but then the shooter just shoots himself in the head instead.
the shooter's body falls onto michael cera, who is now too scared to even screem.
meanwhile, outside, the police department is hiding.
gay officer: "i don't want to go in there, sherriff. he has a GUN! what if he SHOT it at us!? it's TOO SCARY."
sherriff: "don't worry, we're not goin in. i got special orders..."
the sherriff then makes the "sshhh" gesture with his finger on his mouth.
but then michael cera comes out, holding the gun away from himself, like it's a used condom, when he finds the cops hiding behind a corner.
michael cera: "um, ...hello?"
gay officer screams bloody murder and bolts outta there.
sherriff (looking at Cera): "what the hell are you doin son?"
michael cera: "uh, i don't know what's going on. there was a shooter, he had this gun. please take it before it gets into the wrong hands."
sherriff (points his gun at Cera and cocks it): "i don't think so.."
michael cera: "...wait, what?"
but then the news cameras are on the scene, and they can see the two of them
so the sherriff lowers his weapon and says: "you're under arrest for the Maple Park School Shooting^tm "
michael cera: "the what?"
sherriff puts cuffs on him and says: "it's what they're gonna call this event here today."
michael cera: "but i didn't... ok. fine."
michael cera goes to jail, pleading all the while that he didn't do anything.
he sees scary faces of big-ass gorilla-lookin niggas, in the jail cells that he passes by.
the guard tells him that his attourney will be with him soon, that he should try to just get a good nights sleep, cause he's gonna have a long day tomorrow.
we cut to a montage of news coverage of the shooting.
classmates that never actually met michael cera (don't even get his name right) are now on tv claiming that they did everything they could to make him feel accepted, but say that there was nothing they could do beceuse he was always just a twisted, fucked-up psycho.
these classmates also take this oppourtunity to plug their movie-review youtube channels, diy cooking instagrams, and celebrity-parody twitter accounts.
the next morning, michael cera is given a big bin of mail that he's recieved already, and is told that his lawyer is arriving now.
michael cera reads a letter from the bin while he waits.
we only see Cera's shocked reaction to the first letter, while his lawyer(played by Matthew Mcconahay) comes in.
lawyer: "hi there, Michael, I'm your lawyer Matt. Before we get started, is there any questions you might have?"
michael cera: "yeah, how am i getting mail for this already? this just happened yesterday..."
lawyer: "yeah, but it happened yesterday MORNING. so there was plenty of time for some people to see you on the news and write letters before the mail went out for the day. this is just the batch of letters that made the cutoff."
michael cera: "wow."
lawyer: "yeah. it's a lot. you'll get used to it."
michael cera: "uh, i noticed a lot of these are love letters. from girls. in fact it seems like all of them are."
lawyer: "right, well i wouldn't worry about that. i deal with a lot of mass shooting, terrorist attack, and serial killing cases. the accused man always get a whole forest's worth of letters from nubile young women begging for him to fertalize their ovaries and defile them in every concievable way. it's something to do with the primal effect of a man asserting dominance through a public violent act or something. Oh and by the way, under this state's laws, the accused are also given full access to conjucal visit privilages no matter the crime, so a lot of men like you have that option available when they feel inclined and they usually do. Anyway, if we can get started on where you were during the events of the crime scene, i can try to--"
but we see that michael cera is not listening anymore.
we cut to a montage of michael cera plowing one groupie after another, in a trailer, to the tune of Hallelujah played by leonard cohen.
we cut to a news clip, telling us that the case will soon go to trial.
we cut to michael cera meeting with his lawyer again.
lawyer: "michael, listen to me, we have all the evidence in the world that you're innocent. if you just give me permission to plead that way, we can get you off the hook!"
lawyer is rubbing his head like he has a headache, as a result of dealing with Cera. he opens up his bottle of asprin to get a quick pill for himself while he listens to Cera's response.
michael cera: "yeah, maybe. i just dunno..."
lawyer: "if you don't give me permission, then i'll just have to do it without your permission. i will not lose this case just because you're too scared to fight back!"
but just then, another lawyer (a Men-In-Black lookin chick), we'll call her "lawyer 2" steps in.
lawyer 2: "michael cera, i'm so sorry to hear about the passing of your lawyer, but I want to let you know that as your NEW lawyer, i-- oh shit, you're still here."
lawyer: "yeah I'm still here, what the hell are you talking about?"
lawyer 2: "oh, nevermind. i'll see myself out."
...
lawyer: "anyway, as i was saying..."
lawyer takes his pill, then starts foaming at the mouth, with some kind of chemical gas fumes spilling out, he then keels over.
lawyer 2 pops back in.
lawyer 2: "ok, you remember my shpeil from earlier, right? i don't have to repeat that?"
michael cera: "is he ok?"
lawyer 2: "no, i'm afraid it appears he's had a heart attack."
michael cera: "THAT'S what a heart attack looks like?!"
lawyer 2: "i know, it's not like in the movies at all, is it?
lawyer 2 pushes lawyer 1's body out of the seat so that she can sit there instead.
lawyer 2: Anywho, i've taken the time to look over your case and i must say it's not good news. i'm afraid we don't have much of a chance on this one, i'm gonna reccomend you plead guilty."
michael cera: "...oh...ok!
Michael cera now has tattoos on his face and body, and wears a doo rag.
he is now open about his phony role in shooting. He looks straight at us, the audience, and says "i don't give a CRAP anymore."
As a result, one day, he is in a conjucal visit trailer with a fan, and he tells her "before we get started, i just want to make sure if it's ok if we only do it in the missionary position? everything else feels too kinky for me", just like he always does, but the new girl ISN'T interested in fucking him at ALL.
She's an undercover reporter for Alex Jones' Infowars network. she wants info for their war on the official msm narrative about the shooting.
So he tells her that he's willing to testify the real story in court.
But time is running out. Fights are escalating in the prison, and it looks like they may soon turn into a full blown riot.
But then, once the undercover reporter leaves, some secret agents show up and introduce themselves to michael cera as Agent Zog (male) and Agent Henderson (female).
Agent Zog: "we can offer you protection. and in exchange, not only will you not testify, you'll give a new detailed confession with new motives added from this list so that the media can demonize people on the outside who have the same goals as your stated goals.
Agent Zog hands Cera the list.
Agent Zog: "just remember, if you refuse to cooperate, we can just have you eliminated.
michael cera: "wait.. so you guys really were behind the shooting?!
but just as they're talking the riot erupts into a full-on jail break.
while agent zog is distracted by this, michael cera grabs his gun from him and shoots him to death.
michael cera: "framing someone for murder ISN'T NICE!"
michael cera looks around for an escape. but agent henderson just saw him commit a brutally violent act...
agent henderson: "oh michael..." <3 <3 <3
henderson starts stripping off her clothes and chasing down michael cera.
michael cera: "aw geez, what the heck?"
agent henderson (buck naked): "take me now! i want your seed inside me!"
michael cera: "i don't have time for this!"
michael cera tries to keep moving, but agent henderson climbs on to him and ravages him.
michael cera: "ugh! FINE!"
meanwhile, in a helicopter above...
sniper: "wow. he's plowin' henderson."
agent 3: "nice"
agent 4: "yeah, not bad"
sniper: "tell me about it!"
...
agent 3: "you can take the shot now."
sniper takes the shot. michael cera's head explodes.
agent 3 (looking over to agent 4): "and uh, have someone send a car to pick up henderson, i guess."
agent 4: "roger, that's a wrap."
Directed by Stephen Speilberg.

What is a Horde Battle?

(If you’re a member of the Abyss Watchers on Fridays, read no further. Also contains minor spoilers for the Out of the Abyss campaign.)
Battles where the heroes recruit a large number of allies and then take the fight to the enemy boss, be it a giant monster or a terrifying leader of their own army, are a staple of fiction that I have found to be mediocre in 5e DnD. Actually rolling for 20+ allies is extremely slow, and the action economy and bounded accuracy mean that even 5-10 allies that are relevant to the party in strength rapidly trivialize anything that isn’t powerful enough to instantly kill a party member with one round of attacks. If the monster targets allies instead, well, then the heroes are taking no damage and urgency is lost. As such, I’ve created a system for running many-against-one battles that I’ve recently tested and found to work quite well, for me at least: Horde Battles.
The way Horde Battles work is two-fold: firstly, the party recruits powerful allies, both individuals and factions, to aid in the battle. Then, you designate each faction’s contributed damage per round, how many rounds they’ll survive, and whether or not they are helping block damage on the front lines. Special factions may contribute in other ways like buffing the party or disabling enemy abilities, and I’ll provide examples of that below.
Then, you set up the battle on the map with just the boss monster enemy and the heroes, but describe the pitched battle going on around them “offscreen”, to borrow a term. At the top of the initiative order, all surviving allies deal a pre-calculated average damage to the boss monster and their allied hordes, and then during that round, all damage dealt by the boss monster is “divided” amongst surviving frontline allies and the party. This way, a demon lord that swings for 4d12+7+4d6 isn’t outright killing a PC with no death saves if it crits, as only 1/X (with X being equal to 1 + the surviving frontline allies) of its damage is dealt to that PC and the rest is invisibly dispersed across their recruited warrior helpers. Describing a sweeping blow that cleaves several fighters in half before it stops on contact with your player is a fun way to do this.
This style of battle hopefully makes the enemy feel terrifying and insurmountable at first, as the party hears the damage numbers being dealt to it without it perishing, yet also makes the fight doable over time as they take less damage and have allies dealing more. The final few rounds are especially tense, as allied factions begin dropping, and the party goes from taking ¼ damage to 1/3, ½, and then finally face the threat of that 4d12+7+4d6 swing coming at them and them alone. By this point, however, the boss monster has likely been whittled down by all that extra damage dealt by recruited allies and the party has a fighting chance of putting it down then and there.

Designing a Horde Battle

The first step in designing a horde battle is to get a rough outline of the possible friendly factions and characters to bring into it. For larger factions like an army, the city guard, or a wizard’s college, calculating out their group damage per round against the boss monster with all of them alive, and then designating how many rounds they could survive as a group against that boss monster is typically enough. For individual NPCs, you can do that, but I often prefer to have them give specific buffs- one sorcerer doesn’t contribute or block damage, but rather hastes two party members for the duration of the fight, for example, or the city’s high priest grants Bless and Heroism to all party members.
Remember that in 5e RAW, the action economy means that a large group of regular city guards will do a shocking amount of damage even to fairly strong boss monsters, so I recommend giving the boss immunity to nonmagical bludgeoning, piercing and slashing or at least resistance to it in order to offset that. Furthermore, the city might have 100 guards, but only perhaps fifty of them are available on a moment’s notice to join this battle, and only maybe twenty of those at a time can contribute thanks to overcrowding, and of those twenty many of them will miss their attacks. The purpose of this system is to make the players feel like heroic leaders of their assembled army, so having their recruits do respectable damage is important, but having them do more damage outright than the players do might make the party feel like they weren’t even necessary.
There are then two ways to decide on health for the boss- a version where you balance the monster around the party’s allies, and a version where you need to balance the party’s allies around the monster. In the case of the former, I’ve included an example excel spreadsheet I used to calculate how much damage the various allies would deal over a projected five-round battle, with a final form-fillable box for how many hit points I would give the boss for the party alone to chew through. That way, assuming I wanted the boss to have, say, 200hp for the party to get through, then I would add the projected 5-round damage of each faction as the party recruited them and end up giving the monster anywhere from 400-700 health total.
“Isn’t this removing player agency?” Somewhat, which is why you just don’t tell them you’re doing it, same with fudging the occasional dice roll. When running a monster battle like this, failing to remember to recruit one faction can be over 100 health’s worth of difference, and my earnest belief is that it would be more unfair to TPK the party over one mistake like that than it would be to just quietly reduce that 100 health down to, say, twenty, so that the players are still punished but not with death.
If you are uncomfortable with the prior method of health generation, then my recommended alternative would be to just start the boss with mid-to-maximum possible health, and then make sure to nudge the party into remembering all the possible factions. This is more honest but also a bit more railroad-y, as the ability for players to forget and make mistakes is what makes them feel good when they do remember that ally or faction they missed out on.
A middle ground would be to increase the boss monster’s health by ~80% of the damage of each faction. That way the extra 20% is taken out of the damage the party would have to deal, and thus the fight does get noticeably easier with each ally brought to the battlefield, but never trivialized.

Example: The Battle of Gracklstugh

I recently ran one such battle in the Duergar city of Gracklstugh. A brief background of the situation is a local cult of Demogorgon had nearly finished breaking open a rift between the planes in the city harbor and threatened to summon Demogorgon himself. The party stopped them, but the rift was too close to fully-opened to be left alone- in five days’ time, Demogorgon would break out. The only way to prevent it would be to open the rift early and let through a lesser demon, one of his lieutenants, to relieve the pent-up pressure and fix the rift for good. The lieutenant in question was Groyle the Fleshender, from the MCDM supplement Kingdoms & Warfare.

Groyle the Fleshender

Groyle has ~400-700 health (based on factions recruited. If I were running him flat, I’d make his HP 575), immunity to nonmagical physical damage, and has an Abhorrence ability that grants him resistance to magical physical damage. He attacks four times per turn at a +13 to hit, with a horn (4d12+8), two claws (4d8+8) and a bite (8d10+8), as well as swallowing, and has some other unique passives and villain actions that I won't get into, as the purpose here is to give you a ballpark of his tankiness and damage output rather than an actual specific statblock to use. Just make sure that the boss has plenty to do and is an interesting fight at the baseline, as with any other normal fight.
While Groyle is alive, an Abyssal Rift is open, and through it pours a horde of demons. When dealing the Allied damage for the round at the top of initiative, the first 90 damage dealt is spent on killing the most recent batch of demons that came through the rift, after which damage is dealt to Groyle. In the unlikely event that the allied damage did not exceed 90, then the remaining hit points would be manifested as surviving Dretch demons placed onto the battlefield. Important to note that you should deal Themberchaud’s damage first if he has been recruited, as he automatically destroys the demons, then Stone Guard and Clain Cairngorm damage next, as they are capable of damaging the rift’s demons but not Groyle himself.

Recruitable Allies

The Iron Maiden: This is one of the two allies automatically given to the party, a Duergar ironclad in the harbor. It does not tank damage, but attacks for 12d10 magical piercing damage with its cannons, after which it must spend two rounds reloading before it fires again. Given that I expected this fight to take five rounds, I expected this to fire twice, with a possible third barrage to finish off Groyle if things went horribly wrong.
The Stone Guard: The other freely provided allied faction, and the defenders / police force of Gracklstugh. They are also the tankiest faction, able to withstand 5 rounds of Groyle’s attacks before falling back. They deal 10d6+30 nonmagical bludgeoning damage, reduced by 2d6+6 each round as their members are injured or slain. Important that the faction that lasts the longest is the one given for free, so that even if the party misses out on several other factions they’ll only be taking half damage at maximum for five rounds of the battle.
Clan Grimmerzhul: A particularly important clan of weaponsmiths in the city, if the party completes a few odd jobs and wipes out the Grey Ghosts for them, they’ll help in the fight. They have enchanted weaponry but less numbers, so they can withstand 3 rounds of fighting and attack for 6d10+15 magical bludgeoning, reduced by 2d10+5 each round.
Clan Cairngorm: A clan of stone giants living in their own cavern just outside the city. If the party helped to stop the Demogorgon Cult from mutating them into insane Ettins, and especially if they party saved the initial ettin that they encounter just after entering the city, they’ll help and can withstand 4 rounds of fighting. They deal 12d10+24 nonmagical bludgeoning, reduced by 3d10+6 each round.
The Grey Ghosts: If the party chooses not to wipe out this thieves’ guild, they’ll chip in with their psionic blades. As stealthy fighters, they won’t contribute to tanking, and they aren’t particularly courageous either, so they lose a third of their members each round as they lose their nerve and flee. The Grey Ghosts deal 3d6+9 psychic damage, reduced by 1d6+3 each round.
The Amethyst Knife: A rival adventuring party of psionically enhanced assassins, this group was in town hired by the Grey Ghosts. If the party avoids conflict with them and pays them in sufficiently valuable magic items or knowledge, they’ll stay an extra day and help take down the demons. The Amethyst Knife are also hit-and-run fighters who don’t contribute to tanking, but they deal 4d6+10 magical slashing and 4d8 psychic damage each round, although the magical slashing stops after the second round as the martial members become injured and have to hang back. They also empower the party with Psionic Luck Dice for each member, which they can expend to reroll one d20 result.
House Baenre’s Slaveknight: A corpse of an ancient elven warrior raised by Zin-Carla and bound to serve a Drow girl named Lilie Baenre, if Lilie is convinced to join the battle by the party, he will fight to protect her. Lilie herself is only able to provide a casting of Aid for the party, but the Slave Knight contributes to tanking round one, attacks and smites twice for 4d6+14 magical slashing and 6d8 necrotic, and then takes Lilie out of danger on round two, attacking once more for the same damage on his way out.
Themberchaud the Wyrmsmith: If the party provides sufficient tithe to Themberchaud, provides him with proof of the Keepers of the Flames’ plots to kill him, or gives him the egg of the wyrmling intended to replace him, he will help the party. He flies overhead out of range of the demons, but uses his breath weapon for 18d6 fire damage on Groyle. His breath weapon automatically destroys the Rift Demons if they are still alive that round, regardless of their hit points. After using it, he waits 2 rounds to recharge before using it again. Themberchaud only lands to fight if the party is mostly incapacitated and Groyle is threatening to destroy the city.
Deepking Horgar Steelshadow IV: The Deepking is under the thrall of a succubus when the party arrives in Gracklstugh. If they manage to free him from the enchantment, his gratitude is such that he fights alongside them against Groyle when the time comes. When the fight starts, he grants the party resistance to fire damage and the benefits of the Heroism and Bless spells for the duration of the fight, and although he doesn’t directly tank damage, he deals 2d8+5 magical slashing and 2d6 fire each round.
I have linked the filled-out excel spreadsheet I used to calculate the average DPR and health that Groyle would need to have for the battle, with each optional faction toggleable on or off. I started with 200 HP, which I thought was reasonable for a solo boss against the party, especially given he took half physical damage.

How it went

My players reported feeling impressed with the experience, and especially how it felt awesome taking on something well above their pay grade that they normally wouldn’t face until much later on in a campaign, with the help of their gathered allies and a pre-prepared battlefield. They recruited all allies except the Grey Ghosts and the Amethyst Knife, and they ended up successfully killing him on round 4 without any party members going down despite being only level 5.
For my part I also thought it went swimmingly. The damage numbers for Groyle worked out better than I could’ve hoped, as almost everyone in the party was below half health by the end and if Groyle had gotten another turn off he could’ve outright killed a PC. The only change I would’ve made would be giving him perhaps 50 more health, as he died to the artillery barrage on round 4, and it would’ve been a bit more cinematic if the artillery barrage instead left him low enough for a PC to get the final blow in.
If you do use this system or a variant thereof in your own games, or if anything jumps out to you as problematic or improvable, then please let me know!

I need some insight here. My SO(45M) and I(32F) have a hard time with communication. He usually turns my feelings against me somehow and I'm usually left confused and feeling like maybe it was my fault or maybe I should have just stayed quiet. He shuts down any time we get into an argument. Completely stonewalls me. Now, I know relationships are never one-sided, but I always apologize. I always feel sorry and he never really does. I really believe he thinks I am the only one with the problem or caused a crazy argument for shits and giggles. I always fear he wants to leave me when we fight... (thanks low self esteem). I HATE confrontation.
I am often overstimulated and overwhelmed at home as we have two small children, a 4.5 yo and an 8mo old. I am a sahm. We have no nearby family. So we don't ever have time alone, so talking about sensitive subjects or anything heavy is a task in itself. He works to support us. I am the default parent and home maker. He works hard. I give him credit where it's due. I love him very much, but god forbid I ever have a feeling about something he does that I don't like or call him out on anything. Usually, to avoid conflict I really think hard before bringing anything up. Pick your battles is a moto I live by.
Well, last night he came home in a foul mood. In fact, in hindsight the last few nights he has been short and easily triggered. He shows frustration in ways like slamming things or talking under his breath, heavy walking ect. I let it slide, I get it. You are having a shit week. I have a lot of very challenging days. I don't ever slam things around and usually tell him I'm cranky or irritable as a disclaimer.
Fast forward to our most recent altercation. We have been a little more stressed lately, particularly this last week. He is a weed smoker and is currently out. (not sure if that's relevant but 🤷), Finances, the kids, as is life.
Well I got done with dinner a little later in the evening and was plating it up after doing other chores. Came down and asked if he wanted me to make him up a bowl. He very sourly might I add said "no". I actually thought maybe he was ill by the way his tone was. But didn't ask whats wrong as usually that doesn't seem to help, especially if you're already crabby.
I then proceeded to say well it's late, I will make you a bowl and start putting it away because I have to get the kids down. He immediately sat up in a huff and said "ugh fucking fine, I will make a bowl and fucking eat now." his body language, his tone all of it just put me over the edge. I instantly asked "why are you being a dick!?" normally I would walk away but hot damn, I was pissed.
I know that wasn't the right way but it just came out. I know I should have just asked what was going on... but the dick thing just instictively came out. Oh man. The look he gave was shock and fury. He obviously flew off the handle after that and we scared our older kid. I apologized for calling him that, but also said we need to be adults and learn to talk better. I also asked if he understood why I felt the need to react that way to his huffy attitude and he kind of agreed I guess? He just told me to leave him alone. So I did and we have not spoken a word since. So there. Sorry it was such a long speel. But, am I the bitch here? What should I do?

Hi I am a 31 year old female that needs serious advice on this situation. Last night my sister (26F) took me out to dinner to tell me she found my boyfriend of 3 years on Bumble. So alittle back story me and my boyfriend (33M) have been dating for almost 3 years and we met on tinder twice. The first time we went on a date in 2019 and we just stopped talking and lost contact because a lot of personal things were happening in our lives but then in 2022 we saw eachother again on tinder and from then on we have been inseparable. This man is the sweetest most caring man I have ever been with. We have a very deep connection with one another and he's my person and he said I'm also his person. I never knew love until I met him and our relationship is amazing we never fight although we do have our disagreements every now and then but that is normal and we talk everything out. He's also been cheated on and hurt so he said he never would do that to someone and hope that would never happend to him again we also trust eachother completely. I literally have no reason whatsoever to not trust him. We both got our own apartment about 7 months ago and it's been amazing we work a lot about 50 hours a week and if we are not at work we are at home spending time with eachother. If he hangs out with friends it's at our place. 

There has been no red flags or any signs at all indicating he's cheating or talking to other girls. Well my sister told me last night she saw my boyfriend on Bumble about a week or 2 ago and even matched with him to see if they would really match up and they did and she sent me screenshot of it. When I found out I thought I was going to pass out I drove home and confronted him right then and there he installed the app and looks like it had been deactivated for awhile the pictures on there were before he met me and he was about 20 pounds lighter. He let me go through his phone and even looked in his emails to see if he was logging in and he wasn't.

My sister is saying people can delete those things and this and that so now I'm just confused as to what is going on I trust my boyfriend completely and still think he hasn't done anything wrong because our relationship is so strong. Could it be another person that hacked his account or completely copied his profile because it's the same exact profile that he had years ago. What would you guys do in this situation just trust your partner or could I do some deeper investigating? Please help 

It's a very long and strange story, but I'll do my best to make it shorter and understandable. First of all, I won't try to make this reasonable, I know it's abnormal. I don't wanna making it even longer. The only info you should know is he was my first love and bf, and I met him through his anon FB page where he made comments about daily and political issues. I was 16 back then, and I fell in love with him even though I didn't even know his name. Over time, I found out who he actually was, but didn't even have the courage to talk to him and knew that it was impossible for us to ever meet and be together, which led me to extreme depression. It took me almost two years to heal. I was alright, but I still didn't get over him at all; I still loved him, and it went on for five years.
But 3 months ago, I texted him from a fake acc& told him what happened and expressed my feelings. I didn't expect any positive response at all; I thought he'd either block or ghost me. But things turned out very different from my expectations. He was shocked and thought it was a cruel joke from his exes or friends. He said this is all too good to be true. I was too good to be true. And somehow, we ended up together. We shared so many things, said a ton of deep shit. He did everything to convince me to spend my life with him. He admitted he actually loved someone after 15 years. He said I'll be his, I'll live with him after I graduate. He always told me I was a super rare exception to him; he doesn't have any respect and expectations from women at all; he was single for four years by his choice. He described himself as an MGTOW, and a lot more. I'm just telling you these to explain it was not something basic at all; it was very special (or maybe I just believed it was).
So, 6 days ago, when he received my package, he suddenly broke up with me. He apologized for not choosing his words carefully. He exactly said: 'I do care for you and like you, but I'm not in love with you. Actually, I can't fall in love with you or anyone for that matter. I can't love, I can't yearn for, I can't desire anyone. I'm too far beyond saving, too black-pilled. You will be messed up with me. I don't cheat, but I can't react to any of your words full of intimacy. I'd never forgive myself if I ever make you this upset. I can't trust myself with you. Let me be your hero and protect you from myself.' That's the only reason he stated. I literally begged him to not ruin everything, not even caring about any self-respect at this point. I asked him: 'You always said everything will be alright with time. You calmed me down. But why are you throwing everything away now?' He got mad. He said he can't fall in love with me no matter how hard he tries. Nothing triggers him. He yelled at me, saying, 'How could you be this dumb to not realize how bad I am?' And eventually, I had to accept it. I realized there was nothing left for me to change his mind. Hours later, he texted, 'Don't think I don't feel like shit. Saving you from myself was one of the hardest things I did, even though you don't believe it.' I couldn't say anything. 2 days later, he texted a very long paragraph expressing how he'd never forgive himself for making me so upset again, that I did nothing wrong, I'm one of the good girls. My voice won't leave his head. I just said, 'You are not brave enough to make efforts for this relationship at all.' And that's it, actually.
I'm just so lost and in a loop. I get angry with him and convince myself that it's his loss, but seconds after, I can't help myself missing him and crying. How do I get over him and start to have self-esteem after that? And how can i understand the whole situation and stop being confused. All the confusion about whether he's actually blaming himself and feeling very bad, just like he stated? Did he ever love me? Is he going to regret it? I don't know what is real about this relationship anymore. Please help me to understand the issue objectively.

I’m seeking some advice about a recent behavior change in our cat. We’ve had our cat for 3.5 years, adopting him when he was a kitten. He’s generally a loving and affectionate cat, especially towards my boyfriend. He loves laying on his chest, sleeping with him, and is usually very cuddly. However, over the past year, we’ve noticed some worrying behavior.
Occasionally, our cat will get this look on his face and then become aggressive towards my boyfriend. He bites at his legs when he walks by, pounces on him, and will even bite him out of nowhere. It’s not in a playful way; you can tell he’s genuinely mad. This behavior never happens with me.
Initially, these incidents were rare, maybe once every few weeks, but over the past two weeks, it's been happening every day. We've tried various methods to address this, including:

• Telling him no
• Redirecting him with toys
• Playing with him more
• Moving him away
• Not showing him any attention when he acts out

Unfortunately, none of these strategies have worked. He remains overall a healthy cat and just had his shots a month ago with no concerns from the vet.
We’re aware of products like Feliway plug-ins that might help, but they are quite expensive, and we’re hoping to find a more affordable solution.
For some additional context, he has a brother we adopted at the same time, and we also have another female cat we got a year and a half ago. They all get along well, so we don’t think it’s an issue with the other cats. We also use an automatic feeder and my boyfriend and I take turns feeding them wet food every night.
Has anyone else experienced something similar? Do you have any advice on why he might be doing this or how we can stop it? Any insights would be greatly appreciated!
Thank you in advance!

Sword bard with a lvl dip into hex blade vs sentient dancing sword.
I'm playing a 1on1 game with my wife. We take turns as dm and players with multiple characters in the party. One of my favorite characters is a sword bard with a lvl dip into hex blade. The hex blade is currently pretending to be the spirit of his dead sister by speaking with her voice to try and truly the bard into being more violent.
I saw a funny meme about a sentient weapon getting jealous from watching their ownepartneboyfriend looking at other weapons. I always wanted to try using a dancing sword and this meme gave me the idea of a quest to save a man from an evil monster but the monster turns out to be his dancing sword. She is acting like a crazy jealous ex girl freind trying to kill him after he cheated on her by replacing her with anouther sword. After defeating the sword the spirit would breakdown crying from her heartbreak at not being wanted and the man will try to use his new +3 Vicious vorpal sword of 100% crits to kill her. Then it will break showing he got scammed into spending all his money on a -3 rusty sword of nat1s that had a jem of Distort value in the hilt. Bard will beat him up with a stream of Vicious Mockery that makes the spirit laugh and roll to seduce the dancing sword. If he succeds she becomes smitin with him but if he fumbles she will still join him but it is painfully clear she is only playing along to make her old boyfriend jealous.
This sounds like a fun Quest but then I thought I could take it further by having the dancing sword compete with any other sword the bard tries to use and his hex blade could do the same to get a bit of naritive and game play synergy. Let me know what you guys think.
Jealous dancing sword:
Greatsword 2d6 slashing damage. Magical. Finesse
Bonus action to dance with the sword to conjure the nude spirit of the sword and send her out to fly out 30ft and attack targets with graceful dance manuvers. After 4 attacks she moves 30 toward her partner to return to their waiting arms. Her partner needs to be within 30ft of the sword at the end of her 4th attack with both hands free to catch her and continue her dance or she will drop to the ground.
She will gain a +1 to attack or damage rolls (max+3) after each kill during her dance from doing a good job for her partner. She loses all stacks at the end of her dance or if her partner fails to catch her.
She will seethe with jealously from seeing her partner dance with anouther weapon. Gains a -1 to attack or damage rolls anytime her partner kills a target with any other weapon. If she has a negitive stack at the end of her dance she might "accidentally" stab her partner when they catch her. If she gains -3 she becomes heartbroken and the sword drops to the ground and becomes unattunment with her disloyal partner. Partner will need to spend a long rest convincing her the other sword is just a freind and duesnt mean anything.
The hex blade will be amused by the insecurities and try to push the bard to use it more. I love the idea of the dancing sword competing with the stronger charisma fueled pact weapon. I might creat a quest that will give some naritive closure to the sword and and give it enough confidence to accept a poly relationship with her dancing partner and that b!+@# pact weapon. She would keep the dance mechanic and still get jealous of other weapons but nolonger gain the -1 from kills by the pact weapon.
I think this would be a fun weapon to play with. What do you guys think, am I going overboard again?

Narcissistic grandmother.
Where do i begin.... So my grandmother has always been abusive to me. For as long as i can remember.
As a child my mum and dad practically dumped me on my grandmother and grandfather's step. They took me in. My grandad was always my angel. He loved me so much and I was always the apple of his eye. Sadly in 2009 he died from leukaemia. He was diagnosed on his birthday. Died a year later on his birthday 😔 me and my grandmother never really got along. She always looked down her nose at me. Like I was a piece of shit under her shoe.
It was just me who got dumped on my grandparents step. My sisters went with my mum and my brother with my dad when they split up.
Now.... I don't know much about her upbringing because I literally can't speak to the woman. She is very... Undermining and passive agressive. So I just don't bother as its never pleasant to speak to her. Never has been.
So I have 2 sisters and a brother. My grandmother idolises them. Very openly, almost like it's done purposely to make me feel as low as possible. I am constantly left out of family outings, holidays, meals. You name it. It's making me resent my own siblings.
I became the black sheep very quickly. I have to watch my family doing things together, while I'm constantly left out. Watching from the sidelines, Unacknowledged, Forgotten about if you will.
Fast forward... At this point id had enough. So I moved in with my then boyfriend. I was obviously extremely happy to get away from my grandmother and family. I moved to a different city.
Things were great at first... Sadly he started to change after a while. He started to abuse me also and get violent towards me. I found out he had abused 2 women before me. I escaped with my life barely. But I had nowhere to live or any money as my ex had taken everything off me and used me for my money the entire time and I would like to add that this man also made me disabled. ( trauma induced fibromyalgia, chronic pain and fatigue, ptsd, depression, the whole lot )
So I had to move back in with my evil grandmother, but this time... I'm disabled at this point 😔 the trauma and stress of previous life abuses and obviously the trauma of domestic violence had made me extremely ill. I couldn't even walk. I've been in and out of hospital and doctors you name it.
So now, my grandmother has an evil new tactic up her sleeve. Because I'm now disabled, she uses my illness as a weapon to abuse me. Saying "your brain has gone" " you're crazy " . And calling me and i quote a " fat tw*t " obviously because of my ptsd, I was terrified to leave the house and now my own grandmother is attacking my appearance and mental health and disability all at the same time. My illness has turned my life upside down.
She is taking nearly all my money from me, so I'm unable to save up to leave. Shelters are only offering me places half way across the country, alone, which would absolutely terrify me.
I have had a pretty lonely existence and still live a lonely existence. My pets are my everything and shelters also do not allow pets. So I feel trapped now. I cannot survive without my pets. They're all I have.
I'm trapped with a woman who causes a fight with me any time I leave my bedroom. She attacks my disibilty, my mental health, calls me names, she bins my belongings and throws my stuff around all over the floor. She purposely breaks my belongings. Then she gaslights me.
She literally says I'm imagining things when she does all this stuff to me. All while turning the rest of my family against me by telling them, I'm unruly. Because I'm defending myself and standing my ground on what I know to be true. I've even resorted to recording her when she starts these fights with me. But even when I show my siblings. They instantly side with her or say it's nothing to do with them. Even if I tell my mum. She doesn't care. My mum is a very selfish woman. She has a drug addiction. So she only cares about herself and herself only. My dad has just got a whole seperate life now and a new gf. Wants nothing to do with me or anyone else besides his gf.
I've been abused my entire life. I'm still being abused. I've had enough.
What do I even do about this? I feel like I'm getting more sick by the day because of all this trauma. I'm literally trapped. I'm tired. My soul is literally tired.
If I alert authorities. My entire family will turn on me. All but one. My grandmother's daughter. My auntie. Is also cast out by her. So I do speak to her about the abuse which helps.
But it doesn't help my situation. I'm still trapped here. My auntie has a full house and is also dealing with illness herself. So that's not an option unfortunately.
Has anyone experienced anything like this with their grandmother?
It makes me sick because everyone thinks she's a lovely old lady. She puts on this false image in public. But behind closed doors. She's a monster. An absolute monster. You wouldn't believe some of the stuff she says to me I can barely believe it myself. She's told me to unalive myself and that nobody loves me and she hates me.
I know it's awful to say. But I cant wait until she passes 😢 I can then be free of her abuse once and for all. I hate that I think this way about someone. But when theyve abused you your entire life, Belittled you, called you names, attack you, bullied you, destroys and bins your belongings and has trapped you, then blames you for it. You will think and feel the same way. All whilst rubbing how much she loves my siblings in my face.
She makes me feel like there's something wrong with me. Like I'm unlovable. What did I ever do to her!?!
I remember asking this question once and she said I'm imagining things and im being childish and told to grow up and stop being crazy and that I'm weak.
She loves calling me weak and keeps telling me I'm playing the victim. Well.... I am the victim. You're literally abusing me.
It's not crazy if it's reality right?
Sometimes I feel like Im just not from this family. Even my siblings have nothing in common with me and look down on me and don't bother with me. We are 100% from the same mother and father. I just can't understand how I'm cast out and treated like this. I've never done anything wrong to anyone 😔😔
I've asked many times what I've done to deserve this treatment and they just keep saying the same thing. Stop playing the victim or I'm imagining things and to grow up. My feelings are not valid.
I'm constantly just in my bedroom, because if I come out. I become a target. I barely even eat 😢😢 I have 2 meals a week if that and that's when my grandmother goes out. I go down and make something quick to eat. I tend to buy a lot of snacks online. Things I can keep in my bedroom to snack on when I get real hungry, just to avoid coming out of my bedroom.
Not sure how much more heartbreak I can take.
I've planned a day out at the weekend for the first time in 2 years to go see all my friends. To a rave. Because my legs have gained a bit of strength recently after being bed bound for over a year because I've been so ill. Obviously I'm extremely nervous about leaving my house, but I'm trying to force myself to try get myself out of this rut I'm in. My grandmother has done nothing but attack my image, calling me fat and basically trying to destroy my confidence, so I don't go out and calling me other horrible names because it's a rave I'm going to.
Now I used to rave a lot. So it's the only time I get to mix with like minded people. It's always the same people who go and i class them all as my rave family. I've been super excited and obviously nervous about this rave. I planned it just a week ago. My grandmother of course. Is doing everything in her power to try get me to not go. My friends all live dotted around the country, so i barely ever get to see anyone.
I'm not allowed to be happy. Or have a life or do anything for that matter.
I've been trying to exercise using my hula hoops and other flowtoys. Like my leviwand for example. It cost over 300 pound and my grandmother has gone into the tube it's kept in and binned the chargers and string for it. Rendering it useless and saying she's not touched it and im making stuff up and im going crazy!!!
I know she had done it as it was in her cupboard in her room. It had moved completely from where I actually put it. My room is very cluttered as I've had to cram me, my things and my pets all in here with me, due to having left my ex in such a hurry. I feel like I'm living in a closet. So I thought this one item would be safe in that cupboard as it was expensive. She had moved it and shoved something in its box that I know wasn't in there when I put it in there. She's lost all the attatchments, which I know was all together in that box. So now I can't use it at all. Of course.... It's all in my head and I'm the one who's lost these things even though i know for a fact I kept it all safe and together.
She's constantly sabataging me and saying it's all in my head.
I'm Quickly fading. Giving up. But then.... She will attack me for that too. Fcked if I do. Fcked if i don't. I can't win. No matter what I do.
Even if for example... Something has been on its way out... Breaking for a while and she's aware of it, if it breaks, it's automatically my fault.
According to her... Anything that breaks. Even if I haven't touched it. It's my fault. She will deliberately leave things to deteriorate and then blame me when it finally breaks completely. I'm at my wits end.
I'm so lost and just devastated at how horrible my life has been.
Can anyone give me any advice on what I should do about this situation?

I’ve always hated people. Not really people, but having to interact with them. You could call me anti-social, but honestly, it just bothers me how fake people are. Friends, family, relationships. People change at the drop of a dime, or maybe it's just them randomly deciding to show their true colors, either way, people will always find a way to tear you down and make you feel less than nothing. I guess getting stabbed in the back enough times made me want to keep to myself, unfortunately, in this society, it's hard to avoid people. You have to go to the grocery store, you have to speak to cashiers at the gas station, and unfortunately, you have to have a fucking job…
Every aspect of life demands you interact with someone, and I fucking hate it. That's why when COVID hit, and the country got locked down, it didn't bother me one bit. Not only did I not have to go to work, but the government paid me triple what I made, and sure, even though paying millions of people for years on end for no reason caused this ridiculous inflation we're experiencing now, at least I didn't have to interact with anyone, and even though astronomically more people died because of the lockdowns than died of covid due to it causing depression and desperation leading to suicide along other health conditions that couldn't be treated, I still consider it a plus. My only problem was figuring out what to do with my extra time.
At first, it was amazing. The first week I started and finished 3 shows on HULU I had been wanting to watch, but one thing about the lockdown that hit me hard was I couldn't even go joyride in my Mustang. I guess the cop saw me past too many times in one day and pulled me over. He said if I wasn't out to get essentials, I had to go home or Id be arrested which made no fucking sense. Eventually, I got tired of just watching TV and not being able to go out and enjoy the world. I'd never really been into video games, I mean, I had an X box but mainly to play a Friday the 13th game as I was a Jason Voorhese fanatic along with any other content that would be described as especially heinous, but I figure I might as well put the x box to use since I had so much time to kill. Upon searching through the games, I found the one that would give me everything the government took away.
If you're not familiar with GTA5, it's an open-world game where you basically do whatever you want. You design a character and can choose to do different types of missions to make money, or just drive around and interact with the world. The best part for me was it had a Mustang exactly like mine. I made my character look as much like me as I could, did some missions, made some money, and bought my car. I played the actual game for a while but I quickly found myself more fixated on the mechanics of the world. The people walking and driving around saying outrageous things.
I am by no means a computer or programming specialist which is why I guess it amazed me so much. How did it run how it did? I passed the time simply walking behind people, seeing where they went, driving behind cars, to see if they had a destination. I was amazed to see how these people interacted with each other. A pedestrian, crossing the road and getting hit by a car. An ambulance shows up and revives the person. A gang member shooting a gun causes motorists to drive erratically crashing into multiple other cars and causing mayhem. I concluded the game is probably a grid, like a railroad track these people were programmed to walk or drive on, but when forced to deviate from their programmed route was where it got really interesting, for example, one time a plane crashed causing multiple people to run frantically, and I chose one to follow. They ran and ran and decided to get off the road and head up a mountain. They topped the peak and proceeded to fall down the other side, repeating this over multiple ranges until I got tired of following. I've seen them decide to jump in the ocean and swim toward the horizon, and even randomly jump off a bridge. I understand how they can be programmed to follow a predetermined route, and even deviate to another route while staying on the grid, but some of them do things that kind of make me think they can make choices.
At the end of the day, I’m sure it's just my ignorance of programs and computer shit, but I did find it very entertaining to see what these people did. Eventually, I created my own games within the game, mainly a slasher game where I put on a mask and stalked people from the shadows. I’d wait until it was night, and I would carry a machete like Jason, and just follow people until I felt it was their time to die, and I would kill them. I’d walk through trees and backyards finding somone sitting on their porch or standing in their driveway smoking a cigarette, and I would sneak up and kill them. Sometimes I would just watch from the shadows. I wouldn't even be holding my controller, I'd just sit and watch the world exist because I wasn't allowed to watch my own… Or could I?
I loved walking around the areas that were just trees or hills, away from the city where the animals are, so I decided to go experience my own world again, against the wishes of the government. It’s not like anyone would see me at night, especially if I just walked around wooded areas. For some reason, I can't tell you why, but I wanted it to be as much like the fake world I had been living in as possible, so I even ordered a mask like the one I had been wearing. I put on clothes similar to my character and walked out my back door and into the woods behind my house. The cool breeze was refreshing and the sky was so clear the moon lit up the forest. I had no clue how deep it was but I knew it was deep enough to not worry about cops seeing me and forcing me to return to my prison. For hours I just walked around, admiring nature, all the while wearing a mask and gripping a machete. All of a sudden, through the trees I saw an illuminated floating window. It was too dark to see the house until I got to the wood line. I wondered what the people inside were doing. What they might be up to. I fought with myself in my head about going and finding out inevitably choosing to have a peek. What's the worst that could happen? There were no trespassing signs and the way the law works is you have to be told not to be there by the police before you can get in trouble. The thought of this person having a gun crossed my mind but not before my legs had started walking across the yard. At that point it was already too late, not to mention, I didn't really care. I wanted to see what they were up to.
Only one window was lit up and it was the perfect height for me to peek through. I crouched below it and slowly rose to look inside. It was absent of blinds but it had curtains that were slightly pulled apart, a kitchen window. A woman was doing dishes as her kids were sitting at the table finishing dinner. I wasn't sure if her husband was home, or if she even had one, but I was satisfied with what I saw and decided not to find out. My heart was still racing As I walked back through the woods. This was exhilarating, but as the adrenaline started to wear off, I started to realize I didn't know my way back. I wasn't worried. I happened to have the Google Earth app and knew it would help me find my way home but when I lifted my mask to look at my phone, I realized 2 things. 1, these woods were pretty big, but not that big. Maybe a square mile surrounded 15 houses along its border. 2, it was only 10 o'clock. I obviously didn't have to go to work the next day, so why not check out another house before I call it a night?
As I made my way to the east side of the woods I started to question if what I was doing was wrong. Sure, I could lose the machete, but in my defense, originally I just planned on walking around the woods. I couldn't kill someone. Not in REAL life. But what's the difference between this and simply looking out your window at your neighbor's house or staring at a jogger a little longer than normal? I was just getting a closer look. I decided to lose the machete in case I was seen and continued through the woods until I saw light dancing through the trees. The smoke smell in the air told me it was a fire up ahead and when I approached the woodline I could see a shadow moving back and forth. I crouched down low and parted the bushes to see a barrel with a blazing fire, and a man carrying a cage. I couldn't see what was inside but once I heard the meows I had an idea. He opened the cage pulled out a small cat, maybe a kitten, placed it in a burlap sack, and tossed it in the barrel. The meows turned to screams and it was so loud I had to cover my ears. I quickly turned and darted back into the woods.
I felt horrible, but what was I going to do? The cat was already in the fire so there was no saving it. The screams echoed through the woods for maybe 20 seconds, and then it was quiet. I had heard that sound before thinking it was just some cats fighting or something. How could someone be so fucked up? I mean, I know I can't say much, I’m watching people from the woods with a mask on, but I’m not burning cats alive. I couldn't get home fast enough. I crawled into bed and forced myself asleep so I didn't have to think about what I had just seen and thank God I didn't have any nightmares about it. The next day, I woke up instantly thinking about it but the shock of it had kinda worn off. I felt a little numb trying to understand how evil like that could exist, but I carried on with my day eventually forgetting about it altogether.
When the sun started to go down, I reentered the woods, this time with a route planned out. I’d check out 3 houses a night, all on different sides of the wooded patch in case I were seen I would be out of the general area, and also to learn my way around the woods so I didn't have to rely on Google to tell me where I was at. The first house was dark and the absence of cars in the drive led me to believe no one was home or maybe it was unoccupied. I didn’t approach the second house due to a man working in his garage. The car he was working on was nice and had him so preoccupied he didn't even notice me watching from the open door. I lingered for a bit and then headed off to my final house before calling it a night. I could hear the whipping sound before getting close to the house. My jaw dropped inside my mask when I looked through the window and saw where it was coming from. A man in a wheelchair, and an older woman wearing a face of pure anger, gripping the belt. He sat in his chair emotionless as the woman repeatedly hit him with the belt. He didn't even try to fight back, and honestly, I don’t even think he knew what was going on. The lifeless look on his face told me he was an empty vessel, a health condition the woman resented for whatever reason. I wanted nothing more than to bust in and stop her, but was it my place?
I wanted to take my mind off of what I was seeing, and the image of the woman and her kids came into my mind. I wondered what they were doing… Maybe something normal that would make ME feel normal again. I made my way to the yellow house hoping the wholesome view of a loving family would prevent any nightmares the scene would cause, but when I got close I could hear the yelling. She did have a husband, and they were arguing. Looking through the window, I could see her crying in the kitchen, the man towering over her with fury in his voice. The kids weren't there but it was 11 pm so I assumed they were asleep, unable to hear the anger filling the house. I didn't like how he talked to her, but again, what could I do?
For weeks, I watched the evil that dwelled in the houses surrounding the woods, walking through the dark trees with negative sounds echoing through my head. Images of people, hurting each other, or themselves. 15 houses, very few pleasant to watch, or anything that could be considered normal. Every Monday, a sound echoed through the forest. I felt it starting to change me, drive me crazy but at the same time, cause me to feel numb. So much pain in such a small area, the craziness inside every box with a door. How much more was in the rest of the world?! What even was normal? I made a decision. Sticky notes.
“Hurting yourself isn’t the answer”
“How would you like to be in a wheelchair?”
“You'll burn next if you don’t stop.”
Messages no one would report because they’d have to explain. I approached the yellow house to leave my last note. “Treat her better”, that’s all it said. Maybe it would be enough. Maybe if these people knew someone was watching they would change their ways. His car door would be the best place for this one. As I stuck it on the handle, I could hear the yelling. He was always yelling, and drunk. It was worse than usual because I could hear things being thrown and slammed. I peeked through the usual window just as he flipped the kitchen table and backed her against the wall. He raised his hand, bringing it down across her face. She hit the floor as he stood over her. He took another swig from his bottle before striking her again. Between every angry sentence, he would hit her. He was going to kill her!
Before I could even think I had kicked in the door. Before he could even turn, I had picked up a chair and swung it at his head. He hit the ground and the woman started to scream even louder. I looked down to see the blood pouring from his head. I dropped the chair and ran back into the woods, her screams fading the further I got.
I got home, hid the mask, and bit my nails to the nubs waiting for whatever evidence I left behind to lead the cops to me. Any trails I made over my weeks of walking through the woods, like breadcrumbs for the police, but they never came.
The next day, every news channel played the same story. "Man killed by a masked vigilante." The woman had told the story, exactly how it happened. How he was beating her mercilessly. How she feared for her life, and how a masked person had come in to save it. I wasn’t proud of what I had done. I had taken a man's life. What if he was only going to hit her one last time and be done? Did this man really deserve to die? It wasn’t my intention, and no amount of Reddit or social media posts praising the vigilante made me feel better about what I had done.
The truth is, I'm not a vigilante. I’m not Superman and I'm definitely not God, so who am I to change what I feel needs to be changed? To redirect a timeline that would otherwise never exist. If there is a God, who am I to change what he himself doesn’t deem worthy to alter? So from now on, I just watch… Or not... One thing’s for sure, the longer I do this, the easier it is to not look away.
SHORT FILM at:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKzkNB9Df_Y

I’ve always hated people. Not really people, but having to interact with them. You could call me anti-social, but honestly, it just bothers me how fake people are. Friends, family, relationships. People change at the drop of a dime, or maybe it's just them randomly deciding to show their true colors, either way, people will always find a way to tear you down and make you feel less than nothing. I guess getting stabbed in the back enough times made me want to keep to myself, unfortunately, in this society, it's hard to avoid people. You have to go to the grocery store, you have to speak to cashiers at the gas station, and unfortunately, you have to have a fucking job…
Every aspect of life demands you interact with someone, and I fucking hate it. That's why when COVID hit, and the country got locked down, it didn't bother me one bit. Not only did I not have to go to work, but the government paid me triple what I made, and sure, even though paying millions of people for years on end for no reason caused this ridiculous inflation we're experiencing now, at least I didn't have to interact with anyone, and even though astronomically more people died because of the lockdowns than died of covid due to it causing depression and desperation leading to suicide along other health conditions that couldn't be treated, I still consider it a plus. My only problem was figuring out what to do with my extra time.
At first, it was amazing. The first week I started and finished 3 shows on HULU I had been wanting to watch, but one thing about the lockdown that hit me hard was I couldn't even go joyride in my Mustang. I guess the cop saw me past too many times in one day and pulled me over. He said if I wasn't out to get essentials, I had to go home or Id be arrested which made no fucking sense. Eventually, I got tired of just watching TV and not being able to go out and enjoy the world. I'd never really been into video games, I mean, I had an X box but mainly to play a Friday the 13th game as I was a Jason Voorhese fanatic along with any other content that would be described as especially heinous, but I figure I might as well put the x box to use since I had so much time to kill. Upon searching through the games, I found the one that would give me everything the government took away.
If you're not familiar with GTA5, it's an open-world game where you basically do whatever you want. You design a character and can choose to do different types of missions to make money, or just drive around and interact with the world. The best part for me was it had a Mustang exactly like mine. I made my character look as much like me as I could, did some missions, made some money, and bought my car. I played the actual game for a while but I quickly found myself more fixated on the mechanics of the world. The people walking and driving around saying outrageous things.
I am by no means a computer or programming specialist which is why I guess it amazed me so much. How did it run how it did? I passed the time simply walking behind people, seeing where they went, driving behind cars, to see if they had a destination. I was amazed to see how these people interacted with each other. A pedestrian, crossing the road and getting hit by a car. An ambulance shows up and revives the person. A gang member shooting a gun causes motorists to drive erratically crashing into multiple other cars and causing mayhem. I concluded the game is probably a grid, like a railroad track these people were programmed to walk or drive on, but when forced to deviate from their programmed route was where it got really interesting, for example, one time a plane crashed causing multiple people to run frantically, and I chose one to follow. They ran and ran and decided to get off the road and head up a mountain. They topped the peak and proceeded to fall down the other side, repeating this over multiple ranges until I got tired of following. I've seen them decide to jump in the ocean and swim toward the horizon, and even randomly jump off a bridge. I understand how they can be programmed to follow a predetermined route, and even deviate to another route while staying on the grid, but some of them do things that kind of make me think they can make choices.
At the end of the day, I’m sure it's just my ignorance of programs and computer shit, but I did find it very entertaining to see what these people did. Eventually, I created my own games within the game, mainly a slasher game where I put on a mask and stalked people from the shadows. I’d wait until it was night, and I would carry a machete like Jason, and just follow people until I felt it was their time to die, and I would kill them. I’d walk through trees and backyards finding somone sitting on their porch or standing in their driveway smoking a cigarette, and I would sneak up and kill them. Sometimes I would just watch from the shadows. I wouldn't even be holding my controller, I'd just sit and watch the world exist because I wasn't allowed to watch my own… Or could I?
I loved walking around the areas that were just trees or hills, away from the city where the animals are, so I decided to go experience my own world again, against the wishes of the government. It’s not like anyone would see me at night, especially if I just walked around wooded areas. For some reason, I can't tell you why, but I wanted it to be as much like the fake world I had been living in as possible, so I even ordered a mask like the one I had been wearing. I put on clothes similar to my character and walked out my back door and into the woods behind my house. The cool breeze was refreshing and the sky was so clear the moon lit up the forest. I had no clue how deep it was but I knew it was deep enough to not worry about cops seeing me and forcing me to return to my prison. For hours I just walked around, admiring nature, all the while wearing a mask and gripping a machete. All of a sudden, through the trees I saw an illuminated floating window. It was too dark to see the house until I got to the wood line. I wondered what the people inside were doing. What they might be up to. I fought with myself in my head about going and finding out inevitably choosing to have a peek. What's the worst that could happen? There were no trespassing signs and the way the law works is you have to be told not to be there by the police before you can get in trouble. The thought of this person having a gun crossed my mind but not before my legs had started walking across the yard. At that point it was already too late, not to mention, I didn't really care. I wanted to see what they were up to.
Only one window was lit up and it was the perfect height for me to peek through. I crouched below it and slowly rose to look inside. It was absent of blinds but it had curtains that were slightly pulled apart, a kitchen window. A woman was doing dishes as her kids were sitting at the table finishing dinner. I wasn't sure if her husband was home, or if she even had one, but I was satisfied with what I saw and decided not to find out. My heart was still racing As I walked back through the woods. This was exhilarating, but as the adrenaline started to wear off, I started to realize I didn't know my way back. I wasn't worried. I happened to have the Google Earth app and knew it would help me find my way home but when I lifted my mask to look at my phone, I realized 2 things. 1, these woods were pretty big, but not that big. Maybe a square mile surrounded 15 houses along its border. 2, it was only 10 o'clock. I obviously didn't have to go to work the next day, so why not check out another house before I call it a night?
As I made my way to the east side of the woods I started to question if what I was doing was wrong. Sure, I could lose the machete, but in my defense, originally I just planned on walking around the woods. I couldn't kill someone. Not in REAL life. But what's the difference between this and simply looking out your window at your neighbor's house or staring at a jogger a little longer than normal? I was just getting a closer look. I decided to lose the machete in case I was seen and continued through the woods until I saw light dancing through the trees. The smoke smell in the air told me it was a fire up ahead and when I approached the woodline I could see a shadow moving back and forth. I crouched down low and parted the bushes to see a barrel with a blazing fire, and a man carrying a cage. I couldn't see what was inside but once I heard the meows I had an idea. He opened the cage pulled out a small cat, maybe a kitten, placed it in a burlap sack, and tossed it in the barrel. The meows turned to screams and it was so loud I had to cover my ears. I quickly turned and darted back into the woods.
I felt horrible, but what was I going to do? The cat was already in the fire so there was no saving it. The screams echoed through the woods for maybe 20 seconds, and then it was quiet. I had heard that sound before thinking it was just some cats fighting or something. How could someone be so fucked up? I mean, I know I can't say much, I’m watching people from the woods with a mask on, but I’m not burning cats alive. I couldn't get home fast enough. I crawled into bed and forced myself asleep so I didn't have to think about what I had just seen and thank God I didn't have any nightmares about it. The next day, I woke up instantly thinking about it but the shock of it had kinda worn off. I felt a little numb trying to understand how evil like that could exist, but I carried on with my day eventually forgetting about it altogether.
When the sun started to go down, I reentered the woods, this time with a route planned out. I’d check out 3 houses a night, all on different sides of the wooded patch in case I were seen I would be out of the general area, and also to learn my way around the woods so I didn't have to rely on Google to tell me where I was at. The first house was dark and the absence of cars in the drive led me to believe no one was home or maybe it was unoccupied. I didn’t approach the second house due to a man working in his garage. The car he was working on was nice and had him so preoccupied he didn't even notice me watching from the open door. I lingered for a bit and then headed off to my final house before calling it a night. I could hear the whipping sound before getting close to the house. My jaw dropped inside my mask when I looked through the window and saw where it was coming from. A man in a wheelchair, and an older woman wearing a face of pure anger, gripping the belt. He sat in his chair emotionless as the woman repeatedly hit him with the belt. He didn't even try to fight back, and honestly, I don’t even think he knew what was going on. The lifeless look on his face told me he was an empty vessel, a health condition the woman resented for whatever reason. I wanted nothing more than to bust in and stop her, but was it my place?
I wanted to take my mind off of what I was seeing, and the image of the woman and her kids came into my mind. I wondered what they were doing… Maybe something normal that would make ME feel normal again. I made my way to the yellow house hoping the wholesome view of a loving family would prevent any nightmares the scene would cause, but when I got close I could hear the yelling. She did have a husband, and they were arguing. Looking through the window, I could see her crying in the kitchen, the man towering over her with fury in his voice. The kids weren't there but it was 11 pm so I assumed they were asleep, unable to hear the anger filling the house. I didn't like how he talked to her, but again, what could I do?
For weeks, I watched the evil that dwelled in the houses surrounding the woods, walking through the dark trees with negative sounds echoing through my head. Images of people, hurting each other, or themselves. 15 houses, very few pleasant to watch, or anything that could be considered normal. Every Monday, a sound echoed through the forest. I felt it starting to change me, drive me crazy but at the same time, cause me to feel numb. So much pain in such a small area, the craziness inside every box with a door. How much more was in the rest of the world?! What even was normal? I made a decision. Sticky notes.
“Hurting yourself isn’t the answer”
“How would you like to be in a wheelchair?”
“You'll burn next if you don’t stop.”
Messages no one would report because they’d have to explain. I approached the yellow house to leave my last note. “Treat her better”, that’s all it said. Maybe it would be enough. Maybe if these people knew someone was watching they would change their ways. His car door would be the best place for this one. As I stuck it on the handle, I could hear the yelling. He was always yelling, and drunk. It was worse than usual because I could hear things being thrown and slammed. I peeked through the usual window just as he flipped the kitchen table and backed her against the wall. He raised his hand, bringing it down across her face. She hit the floor as he stood over her. He took another swig from his bottle before striking her again. Between every angry sentence, he would hit her. He was going to kill her!
Before I could even think I had kicked in the door. Before he could even turn, I had picked up a chair and swung it at his head. He hit the ground and the woman started to scream even louder. I looked down to see the blood pouring from his head. I dropped the chair and ran back into the woods, her screams fading the further I got.
I got home, hid the mask, and bit my nails to the nubs waiting for whatever evidence I left behind to lead the cops to me. Any trails I made over my weeks of walking through the woods, like breadcrumbs for the police, but they never came.
The next day, every news channel played the same story. "Man killed by a masked vigilante." The woman had told the story, exactly how it happened. How he was beating her mercilessly. How she feared for her life, and how a masked person had come in to save it. I wasn’t proud of what I had done. I had taken a man's life. What if he was only going to hit her one last time and be done? Did this man really deserve to die? It wasn’t my intention, and no amount of Reddit or social media posts praising the vigilante made me feel better about what I had done.
The truth is, I'm not a vigilante. I’m not Superman and I'm definitely not God, so who am I to change what I feel needs to be changed? To redirect a timeline that would otherwise never exist. If there is a God, who am I to change what he himself doesn’t deem worthy to alter? So from now on, I just watch… Or not... One thing’s for sure, the longer I do this, the easier it is to not look away.
SHORT FILM at:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKzkNB9Df_Y

Yes- I'm 14, and the girl I like is 12. I know the age difference is significant, especially on an emotional level, but she means a lot to me (I'm relatively short for my age, so I could be mistaken for a 12 or 13-year-old). Let's call this girl "Alice".
I'm finishing middle school in about a week and have exams coming up. I've liked Alice since I first saw her in February, and I can't stop thinking about her. She's the sister of one of my classmate's ex-boyfriends (Let's call this classmate "Ava") and she was also getting a lot of attention from the girls in my class. I kept this to myself until I told my best friend (Let's call him Matthew). Initially, I wasn't sure what I was feeling because I had never liked anyone before. At some point, I was teasing Matthew, and in a moment of anger, he blurted out to the whole class that I liked Alice. The girls, including Ava, were surprised but offered to help. Predictably, the secret lasted only six days. When Alice next visited our class, Ava told her I liked her. Alice looked at me for a moment, (sorta) blushed and left the class. I didn't have the courage to talk to her while she was still outside the class, and at the end of recess one of her friends later told me Alice didn't like me. I cried almost every day during the Easter holidays. When school resumed, Ava said Alice wanted to see me. Alice, hugging Ava, seemed shy but smiled when asked to at least ask for my name. My friends thought she might like me based on her reaction. I didn't talk to Alice for a week, and none of my friends pushed me to. Then one of Alice's classmates (Let's call her Brooke) said Alice was waiting for me to talk to her. So at recess, I visited Alice in her class, and she said hi, looking embarrassed, happy, and confused at the same time. She then hid in the bathroom, and her friends, who seemed enthusiastic about the situation, assured me she was just shy. At some point, Ava called me to talk to Alice again, but Alice ran away. Ava later said Alice thought I was cute. In the following days, I visited Alice often, just to say hi, but her friends encouraged me to be more direct. I went up to her and she tried to run away, but her friends stopped her. She eventually took a deep breath and asked what I wanted to tell her. I told her I liked her, and she made the same face from a few days earlier. After that, Alice seemed to lose interested. The next day, we had a proper conversation, and she said she'd see me later, but I didn't manage to visit her during the lunch break. For various reasons, I couldn't visit her for the next week. When I finally did, Alice sent Brooke to tell me she didn't like me, so I was miserable, but after a few minutes, Brooke changed this answer to "It's not a yes or a no," which was confusing. I later realised this might've just been a little remark to make me feel better. I wasn't completely defeated since Alice hadn't rejected me in person. Ava wrote a fake love letter from me to Alice, despite my objections. She managed to sneak past me and bring her the letter. From far away, I could see that Alice seemed happy and surprised by it. However, her friends stopped talking about the situation and helping me, which wasn't necessarily a bad thing, but I found it suspicious. I couldn't gather the courage to talk to Alice for a month, so I decided to write her a letter expressing how much she meant to me and wanting to clear things up. The day I planned to give it to her, I found out she had gotten a boyfriend three days earlier (Don't take this seriously, but I've seen him and for the record, I could easily beat him up). She seems pretty attatched to him too, because to my dismay, they hold hands and sometimes even kiss. Alice still occasionally looks at me with a neutral expression or sometimes even says hi, for whatever reason. Anyway, I've got one week of school left and I've lost all hope, so my question is, what should I do- if anything? Should I talk to her one last time? What should I say? Should I truly give up on this forever? And also, does anyone have any idea what was going on in her head during this whole ordeal? Please, this truly means a lot to me.
TLDR: I'm finishing middle school and have liked a girl two years younger than me for the past few months. My classmates told her, and they pushed us to talk. We had a few awkward conversations, and she seemed somewhat interested. Eventually, one of her friends said she didn't like me, and my classmates stopped helping or talking about this situation. I tried talking to her myself for a month but couldn't. I wrote her a letter, but she got a boyfriend three days before I could give it to her. Now I've got one week of school left and have lost hope. She occasionally looks at me or says hi, for whatever reason. Should I talk to her one last time? And also, does anyone have any idea what was going on in her head during this whole ordeal?

I’ve always hated people. Not really people, but having to interact with them. You could call me anti-social, but honestly, it just bothers me how fake people are. Friends, family, relationships. People change at the drop of a dime, or maybe it's just them randomly deciding to show their true colors, either way, people will always find a way to tear you down and make you feel less than nothing. I guess getting stabbed in the back enough times made me want to keep to myself, unfortunately, in this society, it's hard to avoid people. You have to go to the grocery store, you have to speak to cashiers at the gas station, and unfortunately, you have to have a fucking job…
Every aspect of life demands you interact with someone, and I fucking hate it. That's why when COVID hit, and the country got locked down, it didn't bother me one bit. Not only did I not have to go to work, but the government paid me triple what I made, and sure, even though paying millions of people for years on end for no reason caused this ridiculous inflation we're experiencing now, at least I didn't have to interact with anyone, and even though astronomically more people died because of the lockdowns than died of covid due to it causing depression and desperation leading to suicide along other health conditions that couldn't be treated, I still consider it a plus. My only problem was figuring out what to do with my extra time.
At first, it was amazing. The first week I started and finished 3 shows on HULU I had been wanting to watch, but one thing about the lockdown that hit me hard was I couldn't even go joyride in my Mustang. I guess the cop saw me past too many times in one day and pulled me over. He said if I wasn't out to get essentials, I had to go home or Id be arrested which made no fucking sense. Eventually, I got tired of just watching TV and not being able to go out and enjoy the world. I'd never really been into video games, I mean, I had an X box but mainly to play a Friday the 13th game as I was a Jason Voorhese fanatic along with any other content that would be described as especially heinous, but I figure I might as well put the x box to use since I had so much time to kill. Upon searching through the games, I found the one that would give me everything the government took away.
If you're not familiar with GTA5, it's an open-world game where you basically do whatever you want. You design a character and can choose to do different types of missions to make money, or just drive around and interact with the world. The best part for me was it had a Mustang exactly like mine. I made my character look as much like me as I could, did some missions, made some money, and bought my car. I played the actual game for a while but I quickly found myself more fixated on the mechanics of the world. The people walking and driving around saying outrageous things.
I am by no means a computer or programming specialist which is why I guess it amazed me so much. How did it run how it did? I passed the time simply walking behind people, seeing where they went, driving behind cars, to see if they had a destination. I was amazed to see how these people interacted with each other. A pedestrian, crossing the road and getting hit by a car. An ambulance shows up and revives the person. A gang member shooting a gun causes motorists to drive erratically crashing into multiple other cars and causing mayhem. I concluded the game is probably a grid, like a railroad track these people were programmed to walk or drive on, but when forced to deviate from their programmed route was where it got really interesting, for example, one time a plane crashed causing multiple people to run frantically, and I chose one to follow. They ran and ran and decided to get off the road and head up a mountain. They topped the peak and proceeded to fall down the other side, repeating this over multiple ranges until I got tired of following. I've seen them decide to jump in the ocean and swim toward the horizon, and even randomly jump off a bridge. I understand how they can be programmed to follow a predetermined route, and even deviate to another route while staying on the grid, but some of them do things that kind of make me think they can make choices.
At the end of the day, I’m sure it's just my ignorance of programs and computer shit, but I did find it very entertaining to see what these people did. Eventually, I created my own games within the game, mainly a slasher game where I put on a mask and stalked people from the shadows. I’d wait until it was night, and I would carry a machete like Jason, and just follow people until I felt it was their time to die, and I would kill them. I’d walk through trees and backyards finding somone sitting on their porch or standing in their driveway smoking a cigarette, and I would sneak up and kill them. Sometimes I would just watch from the shadows. I wouldn't even be holding my controller, I'd just sit and watch the world exist because I wasn't allowed to watch my own… Or could I?
I loved walking around the areas that were just trees or hills, away from the city where the animals are, so I decided to go experience my own world again, against the wishes of the government. It’s not like anyone would see me at night, especially if I just walked around wooded areas. For some reason, I can't tell you why, but I wanted it to be as much like the fake world I had been living in as possible, so I even ordered a mask like the one I had been wearing. I put on clothes similar to my character and walked out my back door and into the woods behind my house. The cool breeze was refreshing and the sky was so clear the moon lit up the forest. I had no clue how deep it was but I knew it was deep enough to not worry about cops seeing me and forcing me to return to my prison. For hours I just walked around, admiring nature, all the while wearing a mask and gripping a machete. All of a sudden, through the trees I saw an illuminated floating window. It was too dark to see the house until I got to the wood line. I wondered what the people inside were doing. What they might be up to. I fought with myself in my head about going and finding out inevitably choosing to have a peek. What's the worst that could happen? There were no trespassing signs and the way the law works is you have to be told not to be there by the police before you can get in trouble. The thought of this person having a gun crossed my mind but not before my legs had started walking across the yard. At that point it was already too late, not to mention, I didn't really care. I wanted to see what they were up to.
Only one window was lit up and it was the perfect height for me to peek through. I crouched below it and slowly rose to look inside. It was absent of blinds but it had curtains that were slightly pulled apart, a kitchen window. A woman was doing dishes as her kids were sitting at the table finishing dinner. I wasn't sure if her husband was home, or if she even had one, but I was satisfied with what I saw and decided not to find out. My heart was still racing As I walked back through the woods. This was exhilarating, but as the adrenaline started to wear off, I started to realize I didn't know my way back. I wasn't worried. I happened to have the Google Earth app and knew it would help me find my way home but when I lifted my mask to look at my phone, I realized 2 things. 1, these woods were pretty big, but not that big. Maybe a square mile surrounded 15 houses along its border. 2, it was only 10 o'clock. I obviously didn't have to go to work the next day, so why not check out another house before I call it a night?
As I made my way to the east side of the woods I started to question if what I was doing was wrong. Sure, I could lose the machete, but in my defense, originally I just planned on walking around the woods. I couldn't kill someone. Not in REAL life. But what's the difference between this and simply looking out your window at your neighbor's house or staring at a jogger a little longer than normal? I was just getting a closer look. I decided to lose the machete in case I was seen and continued through the woods until I saw light dancing through the trees. The smoke smell in the air told me it was a fire up ahead and when I approached the woodline I could see a shadow moving back and forth. I crouched down low and parted the bushes to see a barrel with a blazing fire, and a man carrying a cage. I couldn't see what was inside but once I heard the meows I had an idea. He opened the cage pulled out a small cat, maybe a kitten, placed it in a burlap sack, and tossed it in the barrel. The meows turned to screams and it was so loud I had to cover my ears. I quickly turned and darted back into the woods.
I felt horrible, but what was I going to do? The cat was already in the fire so there was no saving it. The screams echoed through the woods for maybe 20 seconds, and then it was quiet. I had heard that sound before thinking it was just some cats fighting or something. How could someone be so fucked up? I mean, I know I can't say much, I’m watching people from the woods with a mask on, but I’m not burning cats alive. I couldn't get home fast enough. I crawled into bed and forced myself asleep so I didn't have to think about what I had just seen and thank God I didn't have any nightmares about it. The next day, I woke up instantly thinking about it but the shock of it had kinda worn off. I felt a little numb trying to understand how evil like that could exist, but I carried on with my day eventually forgetting about it altogether.
When the sun started to go down, I reentered the woods, this time with a route planned out. I’d check out 3 houses a night, all on different sides of the wooded patch in case I were seen I would be out of the general area, and also to learn my way around the woods so I didn't have to rely on Google to tell me where I was at. The first house was dark and the absence of cars in the drive led me to believe no one was home or maybe it was unoccupied. I didn’t approach the second house due to a man working in his garage. The car he was working on was nice and had him so preoccupied he didn't even notice me watching from the open door. I lingered for a bit and then headed off to my final house before calling it a night. I could hear the whipping sound before getting close to the house. My jaw dropped inside my mask when I looked through the window and saw where it was coming from. A man in a wheelchair, and an older woman wearing a face of pure anger, gripping the belt. He sat in his chair emotionless as the woman repeatedly hit him with the belt. He didn't even try to fight back, and honestly, I don’t even think he knew what was going on. The lifeless look on his face told me he was an empty vessel, a health condition the woman resented for whatever reason. I wanted nothing more than to bust in and stop her, but was it my place?
I wanted to take my mind off of what I was seeing, and the image of the woman and her kids came into my mind. I wondered what they were doing… Maybe something normal that would make ME feel normal again. I made my way to the yellow house hoping the wholesome view of a loving family would prevent any nightmares the scene would cause, but when I got close I could hear the yelling. She did have a husband, and they were arguing. Looking through the window, I could see her crying in the kitchen, the man towering over her with fury in his voice. The kids weren't there but it was 11 pm so I assumed they were asleep, unable to hear the anger filling the house. I didn't like how he talked to her, but again, what could I do?
For weeks, I watched the evil that dwelled in the houses surrounding the woods, walking through the dark trees with negative sounds echoing through my head. Images of people, hurting each other, or themselves. 15 houses, very few pleasant to watch, or anything that could be considered normal. Every Monday, a sound echoed through the forest. I felt it starting to change me, drive me crazy but at the same time, cause me to feel numb. So much pain in such a small area, the craziness inside every box with a door. How much more was in the rest of the world?! What even was normal? I made a decision. Sticky notes.
“Hurting yourself isn’t the answer”
“How would you like to be in a wheelchair?”
“You'll burn next if you don’t stop.”
Messages no one would report because they’d have to explain. I approached the yellow house to leave my last note. “Treat her better”, that’s all it said. Maybe it would be enough. Maybe if these people knew someone was watching they would change their ways. His car door would be the best place for this one. As I stuck it on the handle, I could hear the yelling. He was always yelling, and drunk. It was worse than usual because I could hear things being thrown and slammed. I peeked through the usual window just as he flipped the kitchen table and backed her against the wall. He raised his hand, bringing it down across her face. She hit the floor as he stood over her. He took another swig from his bottle before striking her again. Between every angry sentence, he would hit her. He was going to kill her!
Before I could even think I had kicked in the door. Before he could even turn, I had picked up a chair and swung it at his head. He hit the ground and the woman started to scream even louder. I looked down to see the blood pouring from his head. I dropped the chair and ran back into the woods, her screams fading the further I got.
I got home, hid the mask, and bit my nails to the nubs waiting for whatever evidence I left behind to lead the cops to me. Any trails I made over my weeks of walking through the woods, like breadcrumbs for the police, but they never came.
The next day, every news channel played the same story. "Man killed by a masked vigilante." The woman had told the story, exactly how it happened. How he was beating her mercilessly. How she feared for her life, and how a masked person had come in to save it. I wasn’t proud of what I had done. I had taken a man's life. What if he was only going to hit her one last time and be done? Did this man really deserve to die? It wasn’t my intention, and no amount of Reddit or social media posts praising the vigilante made me feel better about what I had done.
The truth is, I'm not a vigilante. I’m not Superman and I'm definitely not God, so who am I to change what I feel needs to be changed? To redirect a timeline that would otherwise never exist. If there is a God, who am I to change what he himself doesn’t deem worthy to alter? So from now on, I just watch… Or not... One thing’s for sure, the longer I do this, the easier it is to not look away.
SHORT FILM at:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKzkNB9Df_Y

I (22F) and my boyfriend (23M) have been together for almost 2 years. When we have sex it is only ever “making love” (slow and normally only him finishing) which at first didn’t bug me because i love him so much and it was just fun at the time. Now we are at a point where i don’t even want to have sex. We have had MULTIPLE conversations (with me ALWAYS starting them) about how it no longer works for me and different ways we could make it work. I’ve asked him to initiate differently ( in a way that doesn’t make me feel like “drop what your doing and please me”) I’ve asked and showed him how to eat me out differently I’ve even asked and showed him different positions to do. I’ve bought handcuffs, wedge pillows, toys, etc. And we always end up back at “do you wanna fuck rn?” (while i’m in the middle of typing an email or something) It’s not a turn on, it feels more like a chore at that point. He’s already ready to go in his mind, and just waiting for me to open my legs at that point. I’ve explained that’s not how it works for me (or most girls in general) At this point i am at a loss and don’t know what else to do. I have stopped initiating anything with him, i tend to turn him down more often than not lately, and the thought of having sex makes me almost angry. (because how can he not tell i’m not enjoying it) The main thing is he can NEVER be the one to bring up hard conversations, he just won’t do it, and never has since we’ve been together, it is always me who has to start them. And after almost 2 years of bringing up this conversations with NO change i don’t know what to do anymore. I love my boyfriend to the moon and back, we’ve talked about getting engaged and we share a house together atm, i don’t what to loose him, but i don’t know how to fix this anymore.

I’ve always hated people. Not really people, but having to interact with them. You could call me anti-social, but honestly, it just bothers me how fake people are. Friends, family, relationships. People change at the drop of a dime, or maybe it's just them randomly deciding to show their true colors, either way, people will always find a way to tear you down and make you feel less than nothing. I guess getting stabbed in the back enough times made me want to keep to myself, unfortunately, in this society, it's hard to avoid people. You have to go to the grocery store, you have to speak to cashiers at the gas station, and unfortunately, you have to have a fucking job…
Every aspect of life demands you interact with someone, and I fucking hate it. That's why when COVID hit, and the country got locked down, it didn't bother me one bit. Not only did I not have to go to work, but the government paid me triple what I made, and sure, even though paying millions of people for years on end for no reason caused this ridiculous inflation we're experiencing now, at least I didn't have to interact with anyone, and even though astronomically more people died because of the lockdowns than died of covid due to it causing depression and desperation leading to suicide along other health conditions that couldn't be treated, I still consider it a plus. My only problem was figuring out what to do with my extra time.
At first, it was amazing. The first week I started and finished 3 shows on HULU I had been wanting to watch, but one thing about the lockdown that hit me hard was I couldn't even go joyride in my Mustang. I guess the cop saw me past too many times in one day and pulled me over. He said if I wasn't out to get essentials, I had to go home or Id be arrested which made no fucking sense. Eventually, I got tired of just watching TV and not being able to go out and enjoy the world. I'd never really been into video games, I mean, I had an X box but mainly to play a Friday the 13th game as I was a Jason Voorhese fanatic along with any other content that would be described as especially heinous, but I figure I might as well put the x box to use since I had so much time to kill. Upon searching through the games, I found the one that would give me everything the government took away.
If you're not familiar with GTA5, it's an open-world game where you basically do whatever you want. You design a character and can choose to do different types of missions to make money, or just drive around and interact with the world. The best part for me was it had a Mustang exactly like mine. I made my character look as much like me as I could, did some missions, made some money, and bought my car. I played the actual game for a while but I quickly found myself more fixated on the mechanics of the world. The people walking and driving around saying outrageous things.
I am by no means a computer or programming specialist which is why I guess it amazed me so much. How did it run how it did? I passed the time simply walking behind people, seeing where they went, driving behind cars, to see if they had a destination. I was amazed to see how these people interacted with each other. A pedestrian, crossing the road and getting hit by a car. An ambulance shows up and revives the person. A gang member shooting a gun causes motorists to drive erratically crashing into multiple other cars and causing mayhem. I concluded the game is probably a grid, like a railroad track these people were programmed to walk or drive on, but when forced to deviate from their programmed route was where it got really interesting, for example, one time a plane crashed causing multiple people to run frantically, and I chose one to follow. They ran and ran and decided to get off the road and head up a mountain. They topped the peak and proceeded to fall down the other side, repeating this over multiple ranges until I got tired of following. I've seen them decide to jump in the ocean and swim toward the horizon, and even randomly jump off a bridge. I understand how they can be programmed to follow a predetermined route, and even deviate to another route while staying on the grid, but some of them do things that kind of make me think they can make choices.
At the end of the day, I’m sure it's just my ignorance of programs and computer shit, but I did find it very entertaining to see what these people did. Eventually, I created my own games within the game, mainly a slasher game where I put on a mask and stalked people from the shadows. I’d wait until it was night, and I would carry a machete like Jason, and just follow people until I felt it was their time to die, and I would kill them. I’d walk through trees and backyards finding somone sitting on their porch or standing in their driveway smoking a cigarette, and I would sneak up and kill them. Sometimes I would just watch from the shadows. I wouldn't even be holding my controller, I'd just sit and watch the world exist because I wasn't allowed to watch my own… Or could I?
I loved walking around the areas that were just trees or hills, away from the city where the animals are, so I decided to go experience my own world again, against the wishes of the government. It’s not like anyone would see me at night, especially if I just walked around wooded areas. For some reason, I can't tell you why, but I wanted it to be as much like the fake world I had been living in as possible, so I even ordered a mask like the one I had been wearing. I put on clothes similar to my character and walked out my back door and into the woods behind my house. The cool breeze was refreshing and the sky was so clear the moon lit up the forest. I had no clue how deep it was but I knew it was deep enough to not worry about cops seeing me and forcing me to return to my prison. For hours I just walked around, admiring nature, all the while wearing a mask and gripping a machete. All of a sudden, through the trees I saw an illuminated floating window. It was too dark to see the house until I got to the wood line. I wondered what the people inside were doing. What they might be up to. I fought with myself in my head about going and finding out inevitably choosing to have a peek. What's the worst that could happen? There were no trespassing signs and the way the law works is you have to be told not to be there by the police before you can get in trouble. The thought of this person having a gun crossed my mind but not before my legs had started walking across the yard. At that point it was already too late, not to mention, I didn't really care. I wanted to see what they were up to.
Only one window was lit up and it was the perfect height for me to peek through. I crouched below it and slowly rose to look inside. It was absent of blinds but it had curtains that were slightly pulled apart, a kitchen window. A woman was doing dishes as her kids were sitting at the table finishing dinner. I wasn't sure if her husband was home, or if she even had one, but I was satisfied with what I saw and decided not to find out. My heart was still racing As I walked back through the woods. This was exhilarating, but as the adrenaline started to wear off, I started to realize I didn't know my way back. I wasn't worried. I happened to have the Google Earth app and knew it would help me find my way home but when I lifted my mask to look at my phone, I realized 2 things. 1, these woods were pretty big, but not that big. Maybe a square mile surrounded 15 houses along its border. 2, it was only 10 o'clock. I obviously didn't have to go to work the next day, so why not check out another house before I call it a night?
As I made my way to the east side of the woods I started to question if what I was doing was wrong. Sure, I could lose the machete, but in my defense, originally I just planned on walking around the woods. I couldn't kill someone. Not in REAL life. But what's the difference between this and simply looking out your window at your neighbor's house or staring at a jogger a little longer than normal? I was just getting a closer look. I decided to lose the machete in case I was seen and continued through the woods until I saw light dancing through the trees. The smoke smell in the air told me it was a fire up ahead and when I approached the woodline I could see a shadow moving back and forth. I crouched down low and parted the bushes to see a barrel with a blazing fire, and a man carrying a cage. I couldn't see what was inside but once I heard the meows I had an idea. He opened the cage pulled out a small cat, maybe a kitten, placed it in a burlap sack, and tossed it in the barrel. The meows turned to screams and it was so loud I had to cover my ears. I quickly turned and darted back into the woods.
I felt horrible, but what was I going to do? The cat was already in the fire so there was no saving it. The screams echoed through the woods for maybe 20 seconds, and then it was quiet. I had heard that sound before thinking it was just some cats fighting or something. How could someone be so fucked up? I mean, I know I can't say much, I’m watching people from the woods with a mask on, but I’m not burning cats alive. I couldn't get home fast enough. I crawled into bed and forced myself asleep so I didn't have to think about what I had just seen and thank God I didn't have any nightmares about it. The next day, I woke up instantly thinking about it but the shock of it had kinda worn off. I felt a little numb trying to understand how evil like that could exist, but I carried on with my day eventually forgetting about it altogether.
When the sun started to go down, I reentered the woods, this time with a route planned out. I’d check out 3 houses a night, all on different sides of the wooded patch in case I were seen I would be out of the general area, and also to learn my way around the woods so I didn't have to rely on Google to tell me where I was at. The first house was dark and the absence of cars in the drive led me to believe no one was home or maybe it was unoccupied. I didn’t approach the second house due to a man working in his garage. The car he was working on was nice and had him so preoccupied he didn't even notice me watching from the open door. I lingered for a bit and then headed off to my final house before calling it a night. I could hear the whipping sound before getting close to the house. My jaw dropped inside my mask when I looked through the window and saw where it was coming from. A man in a wheelchair, and an older woman wearing a face of pure anger, gripping the belt. He sat in his chair emotionless as the woman repeatedly hit him with the belt. He didn't even try to fight back, and honestly, I don’t even think he knew what was going on. The lifeless look on his face told me he was an empty vessel, a health condition the woman resented for whatever reason. I wanted nothing more than to bust in and stop her, but was it my place?
I wanted to take my mind off of what I was seeing, and the image of the woman and her kids came into my mind. I wondered what they were doing… Maybe something normal that would make ME feel normal again. I made my way to the yellow house hoping the wholesome view of a loving family would prevent any nightmares the scene would cause, but when I got close I could hear the yelling. She did have a husband, and they were arguing. Looking through the window, I could see her crying in the kitchen, the man towering over her with fury in his voice. The kids weren't there but it was 11 pm so I assumed they were asleep, unable to hear the anger filling the house. I didn't like how he talked to her, but again, what could I do?
For weeks, I watched the evil that dwelled in the houses surrounding the woods, walking through the dark trees with negative sounds echoing through my head. Images of people, hurting each other, or themselves. 15 houses, very few pleasant to watch, or anything that could be considered normal. Every Monday, a sound echoed through the forest. I felt it starting to change me, drive me crazy but at the same time, cause me to feel numb. So much pain in such a small area, the craziness inside every box with a door. How much more was in the rest of the world?! What even was normal? I made a decision. Sticky notes.
“Hurting yourself isn’t the answer”
“How would you like to be in a wheelchair?”
“You'll burn next if you don’t stop.”
Messages no one would report because they’d have to explain. I approached the yellow house to leave my last note. “Treat her better”, that’s all it said. Maybe it would be enough. Maybe if these people knew someone was watching they would change their ways. His car door would be the best place for this one. As I stuck it on the handle, I could hear the yelling. He was always yelling, and drunk. It was worse than usual because I could hear things being thrown and slammed. I peeked through the usual window just as he flipped the kitchen table and backed her against the wall. He raised his hand, bringing it down across her face. She hit the floor as he stood over her. He took another swig from his bottle before striking her again. Between every angry sentence, he would hit her. He was going to kill her!
Before I could even think I had kicked in the door. Before he could even turn, I had picked up a chair and swung it at his head. He hit the ground and the woman started to scream even louder. I looked down to see the blood pouring from his head. I dropped the chair and ran back into the woods, her screams fading the further I got.
I got home, hid the mask, and bit my nails to the nubs waiting for whatever evidence I left behind to lead the cops to me. Any trails I made over my weeks of walking through the woods, like breadcrumbs for the police, but they never came.
The next day, every news channel played the same story. "Man killed by a masked vigilante." The woman had told the story, exactly how it happened. How he was beating her mercilessly. How she feared for her life, and how a masked person had come in to save it. I wasn’t proud of what I had done. I had taken a man's life. What if he was only going to hit her one last time and be done? Did this man really deserve to die? It wasn’t my intention, and no amount of Reddit or social media posts praising the vigilante made me feel better about what I had done.
The truth is, I'm not a vigilante. I’m not Superman and I'm definitely not God, so who am I to change what I feel needs to be changed? To redirect a timeline that would otherwise never exist. If there is a God, who am I to change what he himself doesn’t deem worthy to alter? So from now on, I just watch… Or not... One thing’s for sure, the longer I do this, the easier it is to not look away.
SHORT FILM at:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKzkNB9Df_Y

I’ve always hated people. Not really people, but having to interact with them. You could call me anti-social, but honestly, it just bothers me how fake people are. Friends, family, relationships. People change at the drop of a dime, or maybe it's just them randomly deciding to show their true colors, either way, people will always find a way to tear you down and make you feel less than nothing. I guess getting stabbed in the back enough times made me want to keep to myself, unfortunately, in this society, it's hard to avoid people. You have to go to the grocery store, you have to speak to cashiers at the gas station, and unfortunately, you have to have a fucking job…
Every aspect of life demands you interact with someone, and I fucking hate it. That's why when COVID hit, and the country got locked down, it didn't bother me one bit. Not only did I not have to go to work, but the government paid me triple what I made, and sure, even though paying millions of people for years on end for no reason caused this ridiculous inflation we're experiencing now, at least I didn't have to interact with anyone, and even though astronomically more people died because of the lockdowns than died of covid due to it causing depression and desperation leading to suicide along other health conditions that couldn't be treated, I still consider it a plus. My only problem was figuring out what to do with my extra time.
At first, it was amazing. The first week I started and finished 3 shows on HULU I had been wanting to watch, but one thing about the lockdown that hit me hard was I couldn't even go joyride in my Mustang. I guess the cop saw me past too many times in one day and pulled me over. He said if I wasn't out to get essentials, I had to go home or Id be arrested which made no fucking sense. Eventually, I got tired of just watching TV and not being able to go out and enjoy the world. I'd never really been into video games, I mean, I had an X box but mainly to play a Friday the 13th game as I was a Jason Voorhese fanatic along with any other content that would be described as especially heinous, but I figure I might as well put the x box to use since I had so much time to kill. Upon searching through the games, I found the one that would give me everything the government took away.
If you're not familiar with GTA5, it's an open-world game where you basically do whatever you want. You design a character and can choose to do different types of missions to make money, or just drive around and interact with the world. The best part for me was it had a Mustang exactly like mine. I made my character look as much like me as I could, did some missions, made some money, and bought my car. I played the actual game for a while but I quickly found myself more fixated on the mechanics of the world. The people walking and driving around saying outrageous things.
I am by no means a computer or programming specialist which is why I guess it amazed me so much. How did it run how it did? I passed the time simply walking behind people, seeing where they went, driving behind cars, to see if they had a destination. I was amazed to see how these people interacted with each other. A pedestrian, crossing the road and getting hit by a car. An ambulance shows up and revives the person. A gang member shooting a gun causes motorists to drive erratically crashing into multiple other cars and causing mayhem. I concluded the game is probably a grid, like a railroad track these people were programmed to walk or drive on, but when forced to deviate from their programmed route was where it got really interesting, for example, one time a plane crashed causing multiple people to run frantically, and I chose one to follow. They ran and ran and decided to get off the road and head up a mountain. They topped the peak and proceeded to fall down the other side, repeating this over multiple ranges until I got tired of following. I've seen them decide to jump in the ocean and swim toward the horizon, and even randomly jump off a bridge. I understand how they can be programmed to follow a predetermined route, and even deviate to another route while staying on the grid, but some of them do things that kind of make me think they can make choices.
At the end of the day, I’m sure it's just my ignorance of programs and computer shit, but I did find it very entertaining to see what these people did. Eventually, I created my own games within the game, mainly a slasher game where I put on a mask and stalked people from the shadows. I’d wait until it was night, and I would carry a machete like Jason, and just follow people until I felt it was their time to die, and I would kill them. I’d walk through trees and backyards finding somone sitting on their porch or standing in their driveway smoking a cigarette, and I would sneak up and kill them. Sometimes I would just watch from the shadows. I wouldn't even be holding my controller, I'd just sit and watch the world exist because I wasn't allowed to watch my own… Or could I?
I loved walking around the areas that were just trees or hills, away from the city where the animals are, so I decided to go experience my own world again, against the wishes of the government. It’s not like anyone would see me at night, especially if I just walked around wooded areas. For some reason, I can't tell you why, but I wanted it to be as much like the fake world I had been living in as possible, so I even ordered a mask like the one I had been wearing. I put on clothes similar to my character and walked out my back door and into the woods behind my house. The cool breeze was refreshing and the sky was so clear the moon lit up the forest. I had no clue how deep it was but I knew it was deep enough to not worry about cops seeing me and forcing me to return to my prison. For hours I just walked around, admiring nature, all the while wearing a mask and gripping a machete. All of a sudden, through the trees I saw an illuminated floating window. It was too dark to see the house until I got to the wood line. I wondered what the people inside were doing. What they might be up to. I fought with myself in my head about going and finding out inevitably choosing to have a peek. What's the worst that could happen? There were no trespassing signs and the way the law works is you have to be told not to be there by the police before you can get in trouble. The thought of this person having a gun crossed my mind but not before my legs had started walking across the yard. At that point it was already too late, not to mention, I didn't really care. I wanted to see what they were up to.
Only one window was lit up and it was the perfect height for me to peek through. I crouched below it and slowly rose to look inside. It was absent of blinds but it had curtains that were slightly pulled apart, a kitchen window. A woman was doing dishes as her kids were sitting at the table finishing dinner. I wasn't sure if her husband was home, or if she even had one, but I was satisfied with what I saw and decided not to find out. My heart was still racing As I walked back through the woods. This was exhilarating, but as the adrenaline started to wear off, I started to realize I didn't know my way back. I wasn't worried. I happened to have the Google Earth app and knew it would help me find my way home but when I lifted my mask to look at my phone, I realized 2 things. 1, these woods were pretty big, but not that big. Maybe a square mile surrounded 15 houses along its border. 2, it was only 10 o'clock. I obviously didn't have to go to work the next day, so why not check out another house before I call it a night?
As I made my way to the east side of the woods I started to question if what I was doing was wrong. Sure, I could lose the machete, but in my defense, originally I just planned on walking around the woods. I couldn't kill someone. Not in REAL life. But what's the difference between this and simply looking out your window at your neighbor's house or staring at a jogger a little longer than normal? I was just getting a closer look. I decided to lose the machete in case I was seen and continued through the woods until I saw light dancing through the trees. The smoke smell in the air told me it was a fire up ahead and when I approached the woodline I could see a shadow moving back and forth. I crouched down low and parted the bushes to see a barrel with a blazing fire, and a man carrying a cage. I couldn't see what was inside but once I heard the meows I had an idea. He opened the cage pulled out a small cat, maybe a kitten, placed it in a burlap sack, and tossed it in the barrel. The meows turned to screams and it was so loud I had to cover my ears. I quickly turned and darted back into the woods.
I felt horrible, but what was I going to do? The cat was already in the fire so there was no saving it. The screams echoed through the woods for maybe 20 seconds, and then it was quiet. I had heard that sound before thinking it was just some cats fighting or something. How could someone be so fucked up? I mean, I know I can't say much, I’m watching people from the woods with a mask on, but I’m not burning cats alive. I couldn't get home fast enough. I crawled into bed and forced myself asleep so I didn't have to think about what I had just seen and thank God I didn't have any nightmares about it. The next day, I woke up instantly thinking about it but the shock of it had kinda worn off. I felt a little numb trying to understand how evil like that could exist, but I carried on with my day eventually forgetting about it altogether.
When the sun started to go down, I reentered the woods, this time with a route planned out. I’d check out 3 houses a night, all on different sides of the wooded patch in case I were seen I would be out of the general area, and also to learn my way around the woods so I didn't have to rely on Google to tell me where I was at. The first house was dark and the absence of cars in the drive led me to believe no one was home or maybe it was unoccupied. I didn’t approach the second house due to a man working in his garage. The car he was working on was nice and had him so preoccupied he didn't even notice me watching from the open door. I lingered for a bit and then headed off to my final house before calling it a night. I could hear the whipping sound before getting close to the house. My jaw dropped inside my mask when I looked through the window and saw where it was coming from. A man in a wheelchair, and an older woman wearing a face of pure anger, gripping the belt. He sat in his chair emotionless as the woman repeatedly hit him with the belt. He didn't even try to fight back, and honestly, I don’t even think he knew what was going on. The lifeless look on his face told me he was an empty vessel, a health condition the woman resented for whatever reason. I wanted nothing more than to bust in and stop her, but was it my place?
I wanted to take my mind off of what I was seeing, and the image of the woman and her kids came into my mind. I wondered what they were doing… Maybe something normal that would make ME feel normal again. I made my way to the yellow house hoping the wholesome view of a loving family would prevent any nightmares the scene would cause, but when I got close I could hear the yelling. She did have a husband, and they were arguing. Looking through the window, I could see her crying in the kitchen, the man towering over her with fury in his voice. The kids weren't there but it was 11 pm so I assumed they were asleep, unable to hear the anger filling the house. I didn't like how he talked to her, but again, what could I do?
For weeks, I watched the evil that dwelled in the houses surrounding the woods, walking through the dark trees with negative sounds echoing through my head. Images of people, hurting each other, or themselves. 15 houses, very few pleasant to watch, or anything that could be considered normal. Every Monday, a sound echoed through the forest. I felt it starting to change me, drive me crazy but at the same time, cause me to feel numb. So much pain in such a small area, the craziness inside every box with a door. How much more was in the rest of the world?! What even was normal? I made a decision. Sticky notes.
“Hurting yourself isn’t the answer”
“How would you like to be in a wheelchair?”
“You'll burn next if you don’t stop.”
Messages no one would report because they’d have to explain. I approached the yellow house to leave my last note. “Treat her better”, that’s all it said. Maybe it would be enough. Maybe if these people knew someone was watching they would change their ways. His car door would be the best place for this one. As I stuck it on the handle, I could hear the yelling. He was always yelling, and drunk. It was worse than usual because I could hear things being thrown and slammed. I peeked through the usual window just as he flipped the kitchen table and backed her against the wall. He raised his hand, bringing it down across her face. She hit the floor as he stood over her. He took another swig from his bottle before striking her again. Between every angry sentence, he would hit her. He was going to kill her!
Before I could even think I had kicked in the door. Before he could even turn, I had picked up a chair and swung it at his head. He hit the ground and the woman started to scream even louder. I looked down to see the blood pouring from his head. I dropped the chair and ran back into the woods, her screams fading the further I got.
I got home, hid the mask, and bit my nails to the nubs waiting for whatever evidence I left behind to lead the cops to me. Any trails I made over my weeks of walking through the woods, like breadcrumbs for the police, but they never came.
The next day, every news channel played the same story. "Man killed by a masked vigilante." The woman had told the story, exactly how it happened. How he was beating her mercilessly. How she feared for her life, and how a masked person had come in to save it. I wasn’t proud of what I had done. I had taken a man's life. What if he was only going to hit her one last time and be done? Did this man really deserve to die? It wasn’t my intention, and no amount of Reddit or social media posts praising the vigilante made me feel better about what I had done.
The truth is, I'm not a vigilante. I’m not Superman and I'm definitely not God, so who am I to change what I feel needs to be changed? To redirect a timeline that would otherwise never exist. If there is a God, who am I to change what he himself doesn’t deem worthy to alter? So from now on, I just watch… Or not... One thing’s for sure, the longer I do this, the easier it is to not look away.
SHORT FILM at:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKzkNB9Df_Y

Jack walked into the ship’s medical bay with his hands across his stomach, feeling like the damned thing was doing an entire circus’ worth of acrobatics, and a decided look of discomfort on his otherwise handsome face. The Jal’kek doctor, who looked a bit like a mythical Naga with a serpentine lower body and humanoid upper body covered in fine scales, must have thought Jack was pissed or something because he recoiled in terror briefly before composing himself and straightening.
“How can I help you,” he asked Jack smoothly, trying to hide his initial discomfort.
Jack didn’t hold it against him. Despite First Contact happening almost 25 years ago, he knew most species in the galaxy regarded humans with more than a little trepidation. Apart from Terra being classified as a “Deathworld,” humanity had made a name for itself in what was called, by humans, the First Contact War and by the rest of the galaxy as the Terran/Tal’check War. The Tal’check were an aggressive species and were only kept in check by the Galactic Federation, a group of 50 or so worlds determined to stop the Tal’check before they conquered the entire galaxy. Then Humanity stepped onto the stage.
Humans had been trying for decades to unlock the secrets of FTL travel but their lack of it didn’t keep them down. Luna was settled first, followed by Mars (mostly terraforming crews), then Venus and several of the larger asteroids that didn’t have high amounts of valuable minerals. There were teasing issues, as always happens with humans, but they were quickly solved diplomatically with the help of a rather forceful diplomat. The Terran Alliance was thus born. Eventually Terran scientists created the first successful warp drive and made contact with the Federation, which had grown to encompass almost a hundred worlds. First Contact with the Federation went surprisingly well despite the inherent terror most of the Federation species felt at encountering a predator species. First Contact with the Tal’check however, did not. The Tal’check hated humanity from the very first, for reasons no one could adequately explain, even the Tal’check, who set out to conquer Terra almost immediately.
Humanity fought back, naturally, and while their ships weren’t as sophisticated as the Tal’check ships, their captains were adaptable, innovative, and had far better training than their counterparts. The Tal’check, and the Federation for that matter, were used to fighting in a far more formal manner and their officers were exclusively from their society’s nobility rather than promoting those who were most capable.
The Battle of Jupiter was the war’s grand opening and the battle fleet the Tal’check had sent to conquer Terra was swiftly defeated with acceptable losses to the Terran Alliance. Most of the enemy ships were destroyed but more than a few were captured and while some were sent to the tech geeks, who were salivating at the chance to study them, most were retrofitted for human use and turned against their builders. The Federation offered assistance at first, which humanity gladly accepted, but after witnessing humanity’s ferocity and determination in battle, which the Federation ambassadors called insanity, they eventually withdrew their support. The human ambassador had just shrugged, told them that humanity didn’t really need their assistance anymore and went on to discuss a new trade deal as though nothing had happened. This disconcerted the Federation ambassadors a lot. They were disconcerted even more when, after just over a year of fighting, humanity conquered the Tal’check Empire in its entirety.
Rather than exterminate the whole race as the Federation had feared, humanity integrated them into its own alliance and now controlled a vast swath of territory and a military that dwarfed even the Federation. Not only that, but they had gained a reputation as fierce, if insane fighters.
Jack himself was about 6’ 2” with piercing green eyes, shockingly red hair cut in the traditional military manner and, unusually for a ginger, nicely tanned skin. The rolled-up sleeves of his uniform jacket were stretched tight over his biceps and looked as though they might rip with the slightest movement of his arms. He knew he intimidated most people, and most aliens found any human intimidating, so he paid the doctor’s reaction no mind.
“I was actually looking for Dr. Rodriguez,” Jack replied, referring to the human doctor who was part of his squad and had come on board with them when they had agreed to be security for this trip.
The Doctor, whose name was Chal, Jack remembered, looked a little disappointed, but then brightened.
“I’m afraid she went to get something to eat, but if it’s nothing too serious I’m sure I can handle it. I’ve been brushing up on human anatomy,” he said proudly.
Jack hesitated for a moment. Doctor Chal had sounded confident, but Jack had taken it about as well as someone saying they knew how to perform open heart surgery after watching a YouTube video. It didn’t exactly fill him with confidence to put it mildly. His stomach gave another flip and he grimaced.
“Ok,” he said at last and shuffled over to lay on one of the biobeds, whose monitors lit up and began to display his vitals as soon as he was settled.
Doctor Chal eagerly slithered over, a little too eagerly if you’d asked Jack, and pulled out a hand scanner. As he ran the scanner up and down Jack’s body, he glanced at the vitals monitors.
“Your vitals look good for the most part,” Doctor Chal said. “Heart rate and blood pressure are a little elevated, but I’m given to understand that that is normal for humans under these conditions.”
“Great, doc,” Jack said dryly. He knew Chal was trying to be reassuring but he was failing miserably and didn’t seem to recognize it.
After a few more passes with the scanner, Chal looked at the screen with a puzzled expression.
“Hmmm,” Chal said consideringly.
Like most humans, Jack really hated when most doctors did that.
“What,” Jack asked trying not to let his alarm show. “What’s hmmm?”
Chal seemed not to hear him for a minute before he replied in what Jack was sure he thought was a reassuring tone. Jack was anything but reassured. “Tell me, what was the last thing you ate?”
“A roast beef sandwich and a bag of potato chips?” Jack said, more like asked, confused.
“Is that a fairly normal meal for you?”
“Fairly normal, yeah. What’s wrong doc?”
“I’m sure it’s fine,” Chal said, patting him somewhat awkwardly on the head like Jack was some kind of pet. “I’m just going to go run these results through the computer really quick. I’m not entirely sure this scanner was properly calibrated for humans.”
He slithered away into his office before Jack could do more than blink stupidly at him. Jack felt like he’d been hit over the head with a hammer.
A few minutes later he heard, “Doctor Rodriguez please report to sick bay, Doctor Rodriguez, please report to sick bay,” come from outside. It was somewhat muffled by the closed sick bay doors, but it was distinct. Jack tried to breathe slowly as his mind raced with ever more terrible predictions of what was wrong with him.
An interminable amount of time later, the doors to sick bay wooshed open and the tall form of Doctor Rodriguez strolled into the room. She had long black hair, beautiful brown eyes that usually sparkled with humor when off duty, and curves in all the right places. Her skin was that amazing bronze color everyone of South American descent seemed to possess and while her chest wasn’t huge, Jack knew his sister would be jealous of it. If he swung that way, Jack would probably try to hit on her and be shot down as viciously as she shot down everyone on the team who had tried. The veterans on the squad knew better.
She glanced at him lying on the biobed and stopped, shaking her head in disbelief.
“Stevenson,” she said knowingly, her voice like ice. She walked over to the biobed as she kept talking and stopped beside it. “I should have known. What did you do this time?”
“I have no idea.”
She gave him a look that said, just how stupid do you think I am?
“Scout’s honor,” he said innocently, holding up three fingers.
She huffed in amusement. “Like you were ever a scout.”
“Doctor Rodriguez,” Doctor Chal said leaning out of his office door. When she looked up at him, he continued. “Could I speak to you for a moment?”
She frowned but nodded and patted Jack on the shoulder before going into the office. Jack hadn’t even had time to say that he had, in fact, been a scout, if briefly.
A few minutes later, Doctor Rodriguez came back out and stood beside his biobed. She was rubbing her forehead, which did nothing to help Jack’s nerves. He knew she thought him a bit of a clutz with the number of times she’d had to patch up his minor, and not so minor, wounds. Most of which were self-inflicted.
“OK Stevenson,” she said putting her hands on her hips. “Just what the hell was on that sandwich?”
Jack was taken aback and slightly confused by her question. “Ummm, mayo, two slices of roast beef, provolone cheese, and some mustard. Why?”
“And the chips,” she asked, ignoring his question.
“Sour cream and onion.”
She stood there for a minute thinking, then sighed. “Somehow, you’ve picked up some kind of parasite. The readings are a bit off, so Doctor Chal is still going through them, but it looks like we may have to do surgery to remove it.”
Jack sighed and fell back onto his pillow. “Great,” he said dry as dust.
“You’re telling me,” Rodriguez replied. “It seems…”
Before she could continue, Doctor Chal slithered up next to her, a strange look on his face.
“What is it doc?” Jack asked his concern rising again.
“Is there some kind of complication?” Rodriguez asked in a defeated sort of way. Her face conveyed that she wouldn’t be surprised considering the patient.
“Some kind, yes,” Chal replied nervously. “I’m really not sure how to…put this. Normally it would be good news, but…”
When he didn’t seem inclined to continue, even with both humans staring at him expectantly, Doctor Rodriguez exclaimed, “Spit it out already!”
The doctor looked at Jack and tried to smile.
“Congratulations PFC! You’re pregnant!” he said in a jovial tone.
In the stunned silence that followed, a pin was heard hitting the floor somewhere.
…
It was chaos in sick bay for a while after that. Jack contacted his husband, who was also on the squad, and he came bursting into sick bay demanding answers as he rushed up to Jack on the biobed and grabbed his hand. Regulations being what they were, the ship’s captain and Jack’s CO were also summoned to sick bay. Other crew members had heard that something was going on and a few of them came to sick bay to see what all the fuss was about. They were quickly kicked out. Rumors started among the crew ranging from the dangerous to the idiotic as rumors so often do. It was only when everyone was assembled and Doctor Rodriguez had explained what was going on that silence fell again, if only briefly.
“WHAT?!” Roger yelped, his voice a little higher than he would have liked under normal circumstances. These were decidedly not normal circumstances.
“How,” several voices asked at the same time including Captain Finnegan, Jack’s CO. Captain Finnegan had seen a lot in her time in the Terran Alliance Space Navy, but this was a first for her. She kept her red hair cut short enough that the natural curls wouldn’t show, and she was the kind of pale that burned in the barest amount of sunlight but never tanned. Her green eyes were normally stern with just a hint of mischief, but all they showed now was confusion. And probably more than a little humor. It might have been a serious situation, and one of her soldiers may be in serious trouble, but she couldn’t help but find a little humor in it. Hell, if Doctor Rodriguez was any indication, she wasn’t the only one to see the humor in it, but they were both hiding it well. Some of the junior officers weren’t doing such a good job and she saw PFC Stevenson shoot a couple of them glares every now and then. She suspected Specialist Singh was recording the whole scenario on his implants, but she couldn’t be sure. She wasn’t even sure what he was doing there, but no one had told him to leave, or seemed to know when he’d even entered the room, so she didn’t give it much thought.
“I am unsure as to the how,” Doctor Chal replied looking up from a pad, and trying not to appear nervous in front of so many agitated humans. “From my studies, I understand human males are not the ones to carry the children in your species, yes?”
“That’s correct,” Doctor Rodriguez replied. “Human females, such as myself and Captain Finnegan, are typically the ones to carry and birth our young. Males don’t have the anatomy to give birth.”
Captain Finnegan shuddered at the thought of having kids. She was career military through and through. While she wasn’t opposed to the occasional romp while on leave, she preferred children be kept as far away from her as possible. On the other side of the galaxy perhaps. Or even better, in a different galaxy altogether. If they had to be near her, she preferred that they be poached and served on toast with a side of bacon.
Doctor Chal nodded in understanding. “As I said, I am unsure how this happened, but I have a theory.”
“Which is,” Rodriguez asked when Chal’s pause went on a tad too long for her liking.
“The scans reveal that the…fetus has half human, half Glorn DNA,” Chal said slowly. “I don’t know how much you know about the Glorn, but their home world has high levels of various acids. As a result, their reproductive systems involve acid, specifically hydrochloric acid…”
“The same kind of acid as human stomach acid,” Rodriguez asked somewhat incredulously.
“Exactly. In fact, the human digestive system is surprisingly similar to the Glorn reproductive system.”
“Similar how,” Jack asked, curious despite himself. Rodriguez seemed fascinated as well.
“Well…” Chal began. “A Glorn’s womb is built much like your stomachs, very similar in fact. Now that I think about it, their similarities would be a great subject for a study on…”
“Doctor,” Rodriguez exclaimed, throwing her hands up and looking at the ceiling in exasperation. Chal recoiled in terror reflexively before he composed himself. She put her hands on her hips and looked directly at Chal. “We can discuss a paper on cross-species similarities later. How about we get back on track?”
“Right,” Chal said, chastened. “The Glorn are a single sex species and only produce their sex cells when they go into heat once a month, which is actually about two human months. During reproduction, the…receptive Glorn takes the other’s penis into their mouth and…um…stimulates it to release. A valve in the throat ensures that the ejaculate enters the reproductive system instead of the digestive. The sex cells, which are closer to human egg cells than sperm, take in DNA from the cells of the throat as they pass through and the fertilized embryo, or sometimes embryos, then settle in the womb. The acids in the womb bring in nutrients from the stomach, which get absorbed through the protective layers the embryo develops. After gestation, birth proceeds much as it does for humans.”
Doctor Chal finished his speech and looked around at the humans with a somewhat satisfied expression on his face. It quickly turned into worry as he looked at the stunned humans around him.
“Are…are you saying,” Specialist Singh asked, clearly trying to hold back laughter. “Are you saying that the Glorn reproduce via blowjob?”
As the non-humans in the room consulted their implants to figure out what he meant, some of the humans guffawed, some laughed outright, and a few coughed trying to hide their laughter. Captain Finnegan coughed into her hand a couple times, getting her own laughter under control. She couldn’t help the smile on her face though. As she looked at the biobed, she saw PFC Stevenson looking a little green. His husband, Corporal Huxley, looked like he could shit a brick. The two seemed to have a quick conversation through their implants while everyone around them tried to gather themselves.
“It’s a damn good thing humans don’t reproduce that way,” Rodriguez mutters to herself. “Gay men alone would make the population growth unsustainable, even with all the habitable planets in the galaxy.”
Captain Finnegan coughs into her hand again.
“If I understand your terminology correctly,” Doctor Chal says after a moment. “Then yes. Fortunately, there is only one Glorn aboard the ship at the moment, Weapons-master Krulmash, so the identity of the…other father, isn’t in question.”
“BUT I DIDN’T SUCK HIM OFF!” Jack yelled. “I’ve never even talked to him!”
He sounded near tears as he stared into Rodger’s eyes, begging him to believe him. Rodger stared back; expression unreadable. Everyone went quiet as they waited with bated breath. Finally, Rodger let out a sigh and kissed Jack on the forehead.
“I believe you,” he whispered to Jack. “It’s ok baby. We’ll figure this out.”
Jack let out a sob and curled into Rodger’s arms, crying in relief.
“If you did not willingly preform this act with Weapons-master Krulmash, then we must find out how this happened.”
“I have sent a quiet summons to the Weapons-master to report here at once,” came the captain’s watery sounding voice. The captain was a Mabon, an amphibious species that looked a bit like the Creature from the Black Lagoon. “He’s on his way.”
“What’s the gestation rate for a Glorn,” Doctor Rodriguez asked.
“Typically, only about six human hours,” Doctor Chal replied. “The human DNA has slowed things significantly,” he added hastily at seeing her look of alarm. “We have another three hours or so before we need to operate. If necessary, we can remove the fetus in two hours and place it in an incubation chamber.”
“We can’t just cut into his stomach,” Doctor Rodriguez said. “Doing a C-section on a woman is one thing but this…”
“I’ve already considered that,” Doctor Chal replied calmly. “Which is why I sent for Engineer Veela.” He waved over a tall creature with four arms that vaguely resembled a stick covered in brown fur. It’s four eyes gleamed with mirth and Doctor Rodriguez noticed a toolbelt slung around where the creature’s waist might be if it had one she could discern.
“I’ve gotta admit,” it said in a high-pitched voice. “You doctors sure know how to put on a good show. My nest-mates will find this whole thing hysterical!”
“I’m sure they will,” Doctor Chal said genially before Doctor Rodriguez could reply. “Engineer, is it possible to use the sick bay transporter to transport something out of a living body?”
Doctor Rodriguez gave Doctor Chal a sharp look. “You want to use the sick bay transporter to teleport the baby out of Stevenson? Is that even safe?”
“Oh sure,” the engineer said with far more ease than Doctor Rodriguez was comfortable with. “If I can get the sensors tuned correctly it should be safe enough.”
“If? Should be?” Doctor Rodriguez exclaimed, her eyes bulging. “There are two lives at stake here. “If” isn’t good enough.”
“Relax doc,” the engineer said holding up one hand to forestall anymore of Doctor Rodriguez’s tirade. It used another hand to pull what looked suspiciously like a wrench out of its toolbelt. “I’ve got this.”
Without another word, the engineer walked over to a console and began removing a panel from its side.
Before Doctor Rodriguez could say anything, the sick bay doors wooshed open again and in walked a creature that looked vaguely human but had giant bat like ears sticking out to the sides of its head. Its skin was a dark brown color and bulged here and there with muscle. The Glorn Weapons-master towered over most of the others in the room. Only Corporal Huxley stood as tall as Kurlmash and he glared at the Glorn as it stepped into the room.
Kurlmash ignored him, walked up to the captain, saluted and said, “Weapons-master Kurlmash reporting as ordered sir.”
The captain returned the salute and opened his mouth to speak, but the Corporal beat him to it.
“What the FUCK have you done to my husband, you bastard,” Corporal Huxley yelled at him.
“I…I don’t understand,” he replied taking a step back in shock.
“It seems Weapons-master,” the captain replied calmly. “That you have somehow impregnated young, PFC Stevenson here. We are all keen to know how this has happened. Especially since the PFC claims that you two have not been…intimate.”
“We haven’t,” Kurlmash said in surprise. “Pregnant? Are you sure? Are you sure it’s mine?”
His last question was almost hopeful, and the Corporal’s shoulders eased a bit.
“The DNA scans are rather conclusive,” Doctor Chal answered. “If you two have not been intimate then we must figure out how this happened.”
“You said that Glorn only produce sex cells during their heat cycles,” Doctor Rodriguez asked Doctor Chal who nodded in assent. She turned to Kurlmash. “Which means you either just went through a heat cycle or are in one right know.”
“It ended yesterday,” he said nodding. “Doctor Chal was storing my seed for me so my mate could use it to become pregnant upon our return to base.”
“You missed your last appointment, as I recall,” Doctor Chal said.
“I overheard one of the engineers talking about a problem with a freezer. I thought he was talking about the sick bay freezers. I was going to call you about it until I found the container you were using,” Kurlmash replied sounding puzzled.
Both doctors looked at each other in bewilderment. Doctor Chal slithered over to a wall and opened a door, taking out a plastic cylindrical container that had a cone shaped opening at the top. The clear plastic showed the yellow contents of the container clearly.
“There was no issue with the sick bay freezers,” Doctor Chal said. “I’ve had it here the whole time.”
“May I see that,” Doctor Rodriguez asked, a look of puzzled curiosity on her face as she held out her hand. Doctor Chal handed it over and Rodriguez inspected it carefully. To everyone’s shock, she opened the lid and took a sniff. “Smells like…” she began and then stopped, a look of dawning horror washing over her face. She quickly replaced the lid before turning to Stevenson who was watching her warily, one of Rodger’s arms over his shoulders.
“You said you put mustard on your sandwich,” she asked him. He just nodded. “Did it happen to be in something that looked like this?” She held up the container.
All the humans in the room stared at the little container, the very familiar looking container. They had all seen one just like it before, had all used one, sometimes two before. The container in Doctor Rodriguez’s hand looked very much like a plastic ketchup, or in this case, mustard container one might find in any human restaurant.
“Dude,” Jack yelled at the top of his voice. “You jerked off into my mustard?!”
Once again, the non-humans in the room consulted their implants while the humans variously tried to stifle their laughter or not throw up.
“I…I don’t…What is mustard,” Kurlmash asks helplessly.
“It’s…” Rodriguez starts.
“Not fucking important,” Jack exclaims. “You went into my fucking food and jerked off into it! You…you impregnated me! Against my will! Without my knowledge! You violated me! I should wring your fucking neck!”
He tried getting up from the biobed, the look on his face downright murderous, but Rodger held him down, surprise clear on his face.
“Baby. Baby look at me,” he said, his voice calm. When Jack looked at him, Rodger smiled. “It’s ok. I’m right here. Everything will be ok.”
They stared at each other for a minute before Jack broke down again crying and Rodger wrapped his arms around him.
“What is wrong with him,” Captain Finnegan muttered to herself.
“Pregnant,” Doctor Rodriguez whispered to her.
Captain Finnegan jumped and looked at the doctor. When had she gotten so close? Then she turned back to look at Jack and noticed his swollen stomach. Right. The man was pregnant. That was going to take some getting used to.
“Is this normal for pregnant humans,” Kurlmash asked Doctor Rodriguez who nodded.
“Pretty normal, yeah,” she replied thoughtfully. “For human women anyway. Human men don’t normally get pregnant.”
“Ah. I see. So, the death threats are because he’s male?”
“HA! No. Human females will issue death threats too. Usually during labor, along with threatening to cut off the male reproductive organs if they ever come near them again. Fairly standard.”
“I see,” Kurlmash said looking worried.
“What? Pregnant Glorn don’t have mood swings or make threats?”
“No, they have mood swings, as you call them, but I’ve never heard of one making such threats before.”
“Probably because they don’t spend nine months carrying the kid only to be put through agony, sometimes for days, just to give birth,” Captain Finnegan snorted.
“Nine months? Days?” Kurlmash looked even more worried now and he glanced at the biobed.
“Don’t worry,” Doctor Rodriguez told him. “This pregnancy may be a little slower than what you’re used to, but this baby will be here by the end of the day.” She frowned. “Or not.”
She walked up to the biobed and placed a gentle hand on Jack’s shoulder. He looked up at her, his eyes wet and red.
“I’m sorry,” she said kindly. “But no one has asked...and…well…do you even want this baby? It’s not too late to abort.”
Jack stared at her in shock, though she didn’t think it was for the suggestion. She thought it was more because he hadn’t thought of it either.
“I could do that, couldn’t I?”
Doctor Rodriguez shrugged. “Your body, your choice. That’s Terran Alliance law.”
Jack looked to his husband. “What do you think?”
“What are the risks,” Corporal Huxley asked her.
“At a guess, because this an entirely new situation and we have zero idea about anything, I’d say probably the same as the pregnancy itself. I’ve been watching his vitals and as the pregnancy develops, more and more strain is being put onto Jack’s body. A body that was not designed for it. I think he may be able to carry the baby to term, but that’s just a guess. Any pregnancy has its risks, and this is a whole new type of crazy. I have no idea what could happen.”
Rodger looked back at Jack. “Your choice my love. I’ll support your decision; unless it looks like I’ll lose you. I won’t do that. I love you too much, searched for you for too long, to risk losing you.”
“I love you too,” Jack said and the two kissed. And kissed. And kept kissing. Just when things were about to turn awkward, Doctor Rodriguez cleared her throat and the two separated, breathing hard.
“So, does that mean you’re keeping the baby,” Doctor Rodriguez asked.
“Please,” Weapons-master Kurlmash said, and they all turned to face him. He wrung his hands and stared at Jack with a longing look. “I realize I have no right to ask this of you, given the…less than ideal circumstances, but please. My mate and I have been trying to have a child for a long time and, I would really like to start a family.”
“Are you sure they’d be ok with a half human child?” Corporal Huxley asked seriously.
“It…will take some explaining,” Kurlmash admitted. “And probably some time to get used to the idea, but I’m sure the four of us can make it work.”
He stared at them hopefully and eventually Jack nodded.
“Alright doc. Looks like we’re having a baby. But if it looks like I might…ya know…die? Well, don’t let that happen. Dying in combat is one thing. Dying in childbirth? My mother would never let me hear the end of it.”
Rodger snorted. “She may not let you hear the end of it anyway. Not to mention your dad…”
“Please don’t,” Jack said with a groan. “Don’t suppose there’s any way we can just…not tell them?”
Rodger gave him a look and he groaned again. “You’re right.”
“I’m afraid it gets worse, PFC,” Captain Finnegan said with a slight wince. “I’m going to need to file a report with Alliance command. To apprise them of the situation. Alliance medical is probably going to want to know too.”
It was Doctor Rodriguez’s turn to groan. “Fuck! They are going to want to know. Every. Single. Detail. I’m going to be in meetings about this for years!”
She glared at the three prospective parents. “The three of you are officially on my shit list,” she said before angrily turning to talk to Doctor Chal. “We’d better make sure this goes smoothly. The less I have to put into this report the better. I hate paperwork!”

eurt si em tuoba yas yeht gnihtyrevE
Oppertunist
Them super powers gettin' neutralized, I can only watch in silence
The famous actor we once knew is lookin' paranoid and now is spiralin'
You're movin' just like a degenerate, every antic is feelin' distasteful
I calculate you're not as calculated, I can even predict your angle
Fabricatin' stories on the commodity front 'cause you saw Germany fail.
A pathetic master manipulator, I can smell the tales on you now
You're not a socialist, you a scam artist with the hopes of being accepted
Your hard working past stood out, but Capital never been in your collection
I write theory that electrify 'em, you write theory that pacify 'em
I can double down on that line, but spare you this time, that's random acts of kindness
Know you a master manipulator and habitual liar too
But don't tell no lie about me and I won't tell truths 'bout you
Shoo, shoo, shoo Shoo, shoo, shoo Bi-bi-bi-bi-bi-bi
Yeah, I'm out the way, yeah, I'm low, okay Yeah, the island right here's remote, okay
I ain't thinkin' about no reaper Comrade, I'm reapin' what I sow, okay
Got a Benjamin and a Jackson all in my house, like I'm Joe, okay
Hellcat, made his homeboys and them types sell they soul, okay
Everybody wanna be demon 'til they get chipped by your throwaway
And I might do a speech a day, once a lame, always a lame
Oh, you thought the money, the power or fame would make you go away?
Have you ever played have-you-ever? Okay, Comrade, let's play
Have you ever walked your enemy down, like with a poker face?
Have you ever paid five-hundred thou', like to an open case?
Well, I have, and I failed at both, but I came out straight
I hate when a comrade talk about guns Then people die, they turn into nuns
Then in exile, like "pray for my city" He fakin' for likes and foreign funds
His daddy a killer, he wanna be junior They must've forgot the shit that they done
Dementia must run in his family, but let it get shaky I'll park his son
The very first time I shot me a Drac', the homie had told me to aim it this way
I didn't point down enough, today, I'll show you I learn from those mistakes
Somebody had told that me you got a ring, on Marx, I'm ready to double the wage
I'd rather do that than let a Georgian Comrade make Vlad turn in his grave
Cutthroat business, you got shit twisted What is it? The hair?
I hurt your feelings? You don't wanna work with me more? Okay
There's three GOATs left, and I see two of 'em kissin' and huggin' on stage
I love 'em to death, and in eight bars, I'll explain that phrase, huh
It's nothin' nobody can tell me, huh I don't wanna talk on no radio, huh
You know I got language barriers, huh There's no accent you can sell me, huh
Yeah, Lev and Stalin know I'm a selfish Comrade The crown is heavy, huh
I pray they my real friends, if not, I’m Feliks Dzierzynski
I don't like you poppin' shit at Trotsky, for him, I inherit the beef
Yeah, fuck all democracy, let me see some real theory
You better off spinnin' again on L, you try voting on me
He's Karl Leibknecht, I’m Karl fuckin Marx, I'm Karl fuckin Marx, yeah, I'm whoppin' feet
We ain't gotta get personal, this a friendly fade, you should keep it that way
I know some shit about Comrades that make Mr Kautsky look like a saint
This ain't been about critics, not about gimmicks, not about who the greatest
It's always been about love and hate, now let me say I'm the biggest hater
I hate the way that you walk, the way that you talk I hate the way that you dress
I hate the way you sneak diss, if I catch flight, it's gon' be direct
We hate the bitches you fuck, 'cause they confuse themselves with real women
And notice, I said "we", it's not just me, I'm what the worker feelin'
How many more fairytale stories 'bout your life 'til we had enough?
How many more shiny titles 'til you finally feel that you've got enough?
I like J with the robberies, I don't like J when he desk ride
You gon' make a Comrade bring back Mike, let me see if Buddy crash somethin'
Yeah, my first one like my last one, it's a classic, you don't have one
Let your core audience stomach that Didn't tell 'em where your medals come from
V12, it's a fast one, bow-bow-bow, last one Headshot for the year, you gonna walk around like Tzar Nick
Remember? Ayy, Top Dawg, who the fuck they think they playin' with?
"Extortion" my middle name as soon as you jump off of that plane, bitch
I'm allergic to the lame shit, only you like bein' famous
Zinoviev can’t give you no swag neither, I don't give a fuck 'bout who you hang with
I hate the way that you walk, the way that you talk I hate the way that you dress
Surprised you wanted me in that process You know that we got some shit to address
I even hate when you say the word "Comrade", but that's just me, I guess
Some shit just cringeworthy, it ain't even gotta be deep, I guess
Still love when the Union see success, everything with me is blessed
Keep takin', the movement forward and it won't be no threat
I'm knowin' they call you The Boy, but where is the man? 'Cause I ain't see him yet
Matter of fact, I ain't even bleed him yet, can I bleed him? Bet
When I see you stand by Mensheviks, I believe you see two Comrades
I believe you don't like workers, they real threatening, you might pop lead in 'em
Let's speak on percentage, show me your splits I'll make sure I double back with you
You loyal to this position now loyal to that position nah your just loyal to you
Try cease and desist on the "Lyons” thesis? Ho, what? You ain't like that thesis "2nd Congress", would like that thesis I'ma get back to that on fake Jesus
Why would I call around tryna get dirt on Comrades? Y'all thinkin' I’m power hungry?
That's ho shit, I got a cause to help, but I can see you don't know nothin' 'bout that
Fighting for prols, know nothin' 'bout that Organizing, know nothin' 'bout that
Developing Organic centralism for the party, know nothin' 'bout that
Teachin' them theory, integrity, discipline, listen man, you don't know nothin' 'bout that
Speakin' the truth and consider what Marx’s considern', you don't know nothin' 'bout that
Ain't twenty-v-one, it's one-v-twenty if I gotta smack Comrades that vote for you
Yeah, bring 'em out too, I clean 'em out too Tell Lev that he better stay right with you Am I battlin' dead generations? Comrade feelin' like Lassalle
Funny, he had a program called Gotha And my Critique tellin' me to off him I'ma blick Comrades all in they coffin
Yeah, Center comrades is dick riders Tell 'em run a revolution to imitate heritage, they can't imitate this violence
What I learned is Comrades don't like the movement
And I'm fine with it, I'll push the line with it Pick a Comrade off one at a time with it We can be on a three hour time difference
Don't speak on the workers, dzmao It can get deep in the movement, dzmao Talk about me and my comrades, dzmao? Someone gon' bleed in your clique, She chema
I be at Gori Tifilis eatin’ Khachapuri with some Churchkhela, dzmao
Tell me you're cheesin', fam We can do this right now on the camera, dzmao
Ayy, fuck y'all Comrades, I don't trust y'all Comrades I wave one finger and dump y'all Comrades, like, "mmm"
Field goal, punt y'all Comrades, they punk y'all Comrades, nobody took my principles
Whoever that's fuckin' with him, fuck you Comrades, and fuck the Party too
If you take it there, I'm takin' it further Psst, that's somethin' you don't wanna do Ooh
We don't wanna hear you say "Comrade" no more We don't wanna hear you say "Comrade" no more

I’ve always hated people. Not really people, but having to interact with them. You could call me anti-social, but honestly, it just bothers me how fake people are. Friends, family, relationships. People change at the drop of a dime, or maybe it's just them randomly deciding to show their true colors, either way, people will always find a way to tear you down and make you feel less than nothing. I guess getting stabbed in the back enough times made me want to keep to myself, unfortunately, in this society, it's hard to avoid people. You have to go to the grocery store, you have to speak to cashiers at the gas station, and unfortunately, you have to have a fucking job…
Every aspect of life demands you interact with someone, and I fucking hate it. That's why when COVID hit, and the country got locked down, it didn't bother me one bit. Not only did I not have to go to work, but the government paid me triple what I made, and sure, even though paying millions of people for years on end for no reason caused this ridiculous inflation we're experiencing now, at least I didn't have to interact with anyone, and even though astronomically more people died because of the lockdowns than died of covid due to it causing depression and desperation leading to suicide along other health conditions that couldn't be treated, I still consider it a plus. My only problem was figuring out what to do with my extra time.
At first, it was amazing. The first week I started and finished 3 shows on HULU I had been wanting to watch, but one thing about the lockdown that hit me hard was I couldn't even go joyride in my Mustang. I guess the cop saw me past too many times in one day and pulled me over. He said if I wasn't out to get essentials, I had to go home or Id be arrested which made no fucking sense. Eventually, I got tired of just watching TV and not being able to go out and enjoy the world. I'd never really been into video games, I mean, I had an X box but mainly to play a Friday the 13th game as I was a Jason Voorhese fanatic along with any other content that would be described as especially heinous, but I figure I might as well put the x box to use since I had so much time to kill. Upon searching through the games, I found the one that would give me everything the government took away.
If you're not familiar with GTA5, it's an open-world game where you basically do whatever you want. You design a character and can choose to do different types of missions to make money, or just drive around and interact with the world. The best part for me was it had a Mustang exactly like mine. I made my character look as much like me as I could, did some missions, made some money, and bought my car. I played the actual game for a while but I quickly found myself more fixated on the mechanics of the world. The people walking and driving around saying outrageous things.
I am by no means a computer or programming specialist which is why I guess it amazed me so much. How did it run how it did? I passed the time simply walking behind people, seeing where they went, driving behind cars, to see if they had a destination. I was amazed to see how these people interacted with each other. A pedestrian, crossing the road and getting hit by a car. An ambulance shows up and revives the person. A gang member shooting a gun causes motorists to drive erratically crashing into multiple other cars and causing mayhem. I concluded the game is probably a grid, like a railroad track these people were programmed to walk or drive on, but when forced to deviate from their programmed route was where it got really interesting, for example, one time a plane crashed causing multiple people to run frantically, and I chose one to follow. They ran and ran and decided to get off the road and head up a mountain. They topped the peak and proceeded to fall down the other side, repeating this over multiple ranges until I got tired of following. I've seen them decide to jump in the ocean and swim toward the horizon, and even randomly jump off a bridge. I understand how they can be programmed to follow a predetermined route, and even deviate to another route while staying on the grid, but some of them do things that kind of make me think they can make choices.
At the end of the day, I’m sure it's just my ignorance of programs and computer shit, but I did find it very entertaining to see what these people did. Eventually, I created my own games within the game, mainly a slasher game where I put on a mask and stalked people from the shadows. I’d wait until it was night, and I would carry a machete like Jason, and just follow people until I felt it was their time to die, and I would kill them. I’d walk through trees and backyards finding somone sitting on their porch or standing in their driveway smoking a cigarette, and I would sneak up and kill them. Sometimes I would just watch from the shadows. I wouldn't even be holding my controller, I'd just sit and watch the world exist because I wasn't allowed to watch my own… Or could I?
I loved walking around the areas that were just trees or hills, away from the city where the animals are, so I decided to go experience my own world again, against the wishes of the government. It’s not like anyone would see me at night, especially if I just walked around wooded areas. For some reason, I can't tell you why, but I wanted it to be as much like the fake world I had been living in as possible, so I even ordered a mask like the one I had been wearing. I put on clothes similar to my character and walked out my back door and into the woods behind my house. The cool breeze was refreshing and the sky was so clear the moon lit up the forest. I had no clue how deep it was but I knew it was deep enough to not worry about cops seeing me and forcing me to return to my prison. For hours I just walked around, admiring nature, all the while wearing a mask and gripping a machete. All of a sudden, through the trees I saw an illuminated floating window. It was too dark to see the house until I got to the wood line. I wondered what the people inside were doing. What they might be up to. I fought with myself in my head about going and finding out inevitably choosing to have a peek. What's the worst that could happen? There were no trespassing signs and the way the law works is you have to be told not to be there by the police before you can get in trouble. The thought of this person having a gun crossed my mind but not before my legs had started walking across the yard. At that point it was already too late, not to mention, I didn't really care. I wanted to see what they were up to.
Only one window was lit up and it was the perfect height for me to peek through. I crouched below it and slowly rose to look inside. It was absent of blinds but it had curtains that were slightly pulled apart, a kitchen window. A woman was doing dishes as her kids were sitting at the table finishing dinner. I wasn't sure if her husband was home, or if she even had one, but I was satisfied with what I saw and decided not to find out. My heart was still racing As I walked back through the woods. This was exhilarating, but as the adrenaline started to wear off, I started to realize I didn't know my way back. I wasn't worried. I happened to have the Google Earth app and knew it would help me find my way home but when I lifted my mask to look at my phone, I realized 2 things. 1, these woods were pretty big, but not that big. Maybe a square mile surrounded 15 houses along its border. 2, it was only 10 o'clock. I obviously didn't have to go to work the next day, so why not check out another house before I call it a night?
As I made my way to the east side of the woods I started to question if what I was doing was wrong. Sure, I could lose the machete, but in my defense, originally I just planned on walking around the woods. I couldn't kill someone. Not in REAL life. But what's the difference between this and simply looking out your window at your neighbor's house or staring at a jogger a little longer than normal? I was just getting a closer look. I decided to lose the machete in case I was seen and continued through the woods until I saw light dancing through the trees. The smoke smell in the air told me it was a fire up ahead and when I approached the woodline I could see a shadow moving back and forth. I crouched down low and parted the bushes to see a barrel with a blazing fire, and a man carrying a cage. I couldn't see what was inside but once I heard the meows I had an idea. He opened the cage pulled out a small cat, maybe a kitten, placed it in a burlap sack, and tossed it in the barrel. The meows turned to screams and it was so loud I had to cover my ears. I quickly turned and darted back into the woods.
I felt horrible, but what was I going to do? The cat was already in the fire so there was no saving it. The screams echoed through the woods for maybe 20 seconds, and then it was quiet. I had heard that sound before thinking it was just some cats fighting or something. How could someone be so fucked up? I mean, I know I can't say much, I’m watching people from the woods with a mask on, but I’m not burning cats alive. I couldn't get home fast enough. I crawled into bed and forced myself asleep so I didn't have to think about what I had just seen and thank God I didn't have any nightmares about it. The next day, I woke up instantly thinking about it but the shock of it had kinda worn off. I felt a little numb trying to understand how evil like that could exist, but I carried on with my day eventually forgetting about it altogether.
When the sun started to go down, I reentered the woods, this time with a route planned out. I’d check out 3 houses a night, all on different sides of the wooded patch in case I were seen I would be out of the general area, and also to learn my way around the woods so I didn't have to rely on Google to tell me where I was at. The first house was dark and the absence of cars in the drive led me to believe no one was home or maybe it was unoccupied. I didn’t approach the second house due to a man working in his garage. The car he was working on was nice and had him so preoccupied he didn't even notice me watching from the open door. I lingered for a bit and then headed off to my final house before calling it a night. I could hear the whipping sound before getting close to the house. My jaw dropped inside my mask when I looked through the window and saw where it was coming from. A man in a wheelchair, and an older woman wearing a face of pure anger, gripping the belt. He sat in his chair emotionless as the woman repeatedly hit him with the belt. He didn't even try to fight back, and honestly, I don’t even think he knew what was going on. The lifeless look on his face told me he was an empty vessel, a health condition the woman resented for whatever reason. I wanted nothing more than to bust in and stop her, but was it my place?
I wanted to take my mind off of what I was seeing, and the image of the woman and her kids came into my mind. I wondered what they were doing… Maybe something normal that would make ME feel normal again. I made my way to the yellow house hoping the wholesome view of a loving family would prevent any nightmares the scene would cause, but when I got close I could hear the yelling. She did have a husband, and they were arguing. Looking through the window, I could see her crying in the kitchen, the man towering over her with fury in his voice. The kids weren't there but it was 11 pm so I assumed they were asleep, unable to hear the anger filling the house. I didn't like how he talked to her, but again, what could I do?
For weeks, I watched the evil that dwelled in the houses surrounding the woods, walking through the dark trees with negative sounds echoing through my head. Images of people, hurting each other, or themselves. 15 houses, very few pleasant to watch, or anything that could be considered normal. Every Monday, a sound echoed through the forest. I felt it starting to change me, drive me crazy but at the same time, cause me to feel numb. So much pain in such a small area, the craziness inside every box with a door. How much more was in the rest of the world?! What even was normal? I made a decision. Sticky notes.
“Hurting yourself isn’t the answer”
“How would you like to be in a wheelchair?”
“You'll burn next if you don’t stop.”
Messages no one would report because they’d have to explain. I approached the yellow house to leave my last note. “Treat her better”, that’s all it said. Maybe it would be enough. Maybe if these people knew someone was watching they would change their ways. His car door would be the best place for this one. As I stuck it on the handle, I could hear the yelling. He was always yelling, and drunk. It was worse than usual because I could hear things being thrown and slammed. I peeked through the usual window just as he flipped the kitchen table and backed her against the wall. He raised his hand, bringing it down across her face. She hit the floor as he stood over her. He took another swig from his bottle before striking her again. Between every angry sentence, he would hit her. He was going to kill her!
Before I could even think I had kicked in the door. Before he could even turn, I had picked up a chair and swung it at his head. He hit the ground and the woman started to scream even louder. I looked down to see the blood pouring from his head. I dropped the chair and ran back into the woods, her screams fading the further I got.
I got home, hid the mask, and bit my nails to the nubs waiting for whatever evidence I left behind to lead the cops to me. Any trails I made over my weeks of walking through the woods, like breadcrumbs for the police, but they never came.
The next day, every news channel played the same story. "Man killed by a masked vigilante." The woman had told the story, exactly how it happened. How he was beating her mercilessly. How she feared for her life, and how a masked person had come in to save it. I wasn’t proud of what I had done. I had taken a man's life. What if he was only going to hit her one last time and be done? Did this man really deserve to die? It wasn’t my intention, and no amount of Reddit or social media posts praising the vigilante made me feel better about what I had done.
The truth is, I'm not a vigilante. I’m not Superman and I'm definitely not God, so who am I to change what I feel needs to be changed? To redirect a timeline that would otherwise never exist. If there is a God, who am I to change what he himself doesn’t deem worthy to alter? So from now on, I just watch… Or not... One thing’s for sure, the longer I do this, the easier it is to not look away.
SHORT FILM at:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKzkNB9Df_Y

I’m 19f and my boyfriend is 20m, I know most people commenting will say to leave…and I know I probably should, but I want to push for a little while longer, and I’d love some extra guidance. We have been together for a year and a half, our issues started over 6 months ago, we have both done a lot of things wrong, for example, I engaged in online SW and camming without telling him, and I also had a very bad freak out on a night out where I got overly jealous and said some very horrible things that no partner should have to hear, sometimes I do also lose control in fights when it gets too much and raise my voice, storm out etc Anyhow, a year ago I noticed some of my boyfriends interactions on social media made me uncomfortable such as him liking pictures of certain women and still having his ex on IG, I asked him to stop which didn’t happen until the third time.. afterwards it was looking up specific porn models on insta, other platforms such as only fans and trying to find leaks of them, it all made me uncomfortable and no matter how much I cried and told him to stop he still didn’t for a very long time. In the meantime we broke up due to him talking badly to his friends about me about the things I stated I did wrong above, and him also being unsure of me because of these things. We made up after a few weeks and that’s when I discovered that he had followed his ex on instagram again and also lied and told me he didn’t. And I also asked him to uninstall twitter because of p0rn reasons, he said he would and when I took a peek behind his shoulder I found he still had twitter and had been watching porn on there and following multiple models. After this happened we had a big fight, he kept trying to grab the phone out of my hands and I told him to shut the fuck up, I invaded his privacy and looked through his entire phone. He had unblocked his ex again but didn’t follow her. At this point my blood was boiling and I asked him why? he said that because we were still taking our time as we discussed after getting back together. Him using this as an excuse made me so angry so I said he feels comfortable breaking my boundaries and stepping all over me, that he is a liar and that every single time he does this to me it makes me care less. After this he used what I said to make me apologise to him, and then brought up everything I ever done wrong in the relationship to show that this is nothing compared to what he has forgiven me for. In the end we kept going back in circles and we both decided to just call it a night and honestly I have been crying ever since because I just can’t deal with him not really caring about how this hurt me, I don’t know if him apologising for this means that it will change or if he will just do it again. Mostly all our fights seem to end up with me apologising. I just don’t know if I’m being gaslit and abused or if I actually deserve this.
TLDR: girl not sure if her boyfriend is a bad person or not and if he is she would like ways of helping him

I’ve always hated people. Not really people, but having to interact with them. You could call me anti-social, but honestly, it just bothers me how fake people are. Friends, family, relationships. People change at the drop of a dime, or maybe it's just them randomly deciding to show their true colors, either way, people will always find a way to tear you down and make you feel less than nothing. I guess getting stabbed in the back enough times made me want to keep to myself, unfortunately, in this society, it's hard to avoid people. You have to go to the grocery store, you have to speak to cashiers at the gas station, and unfortunately, you have to have a fucking job…
Every aspect of life demands you interact with someone, and I fucking hate it. That's why when COVID hit, and the country got locked down, it didn't bother me one bit. Not only did I not have to go to work, but the government paid me triple what I made, and sure, even though paying millions of people for years on end for no reason caused this ridiculous inflation we're experiencing now, at least I didn't have to interact with anyone, and even though astronomically more people died because of the lockdowns than died of covid due to it causing depression and desperation leading to suicide along other health conditions that couldn't be treated, I still consider it a plus. My only problem was figuring out what to do with my extra time.
At first, it was amazing. The first week I started and finished 3 shows on HULU I had been wanting to watch, but one thing about the lockdown that hit me hard was I couldn't even go joyride in my Mustang. I guess the cop saw me past too many times in one day and pulled me over. He said if I wasn't out to get essentials, I had to go home or Id be arrested which made no fucking sense. Eventually, I got tired of just watching TV and not being able to go out and enjoy the world. I'd never really been into video games, I mean, I had an X box but mainly to play a Friday the 13th game as I was a Jason Voorhese fanatic along with any other content that would be described as especially heinous, but I figure I might as well put the x box to use since I had so much time to kill. Upon searching through the games, I found the one that would give me everything the government took away.
If you're not familiar with GTA5, it's an open-world game where you basically do whatever you want. You design a character and can choose to do different types of missions to make money, or just drive around and interact with the world. The best part for me was it had a Mustang exactly like mine. I made my character look as much like me as I could, did some missions, made some money, and bought my car. I played the actual game for a while but I quickly found myself more fixated on the mechanics of the world. The people walking and driving around saying outrageous things.
I am by no means a computer or programming specialist which is why I guess it amazed me so much. How did it run how it did? I passed the time simply walking behind people, seeing where they went, driving behind cars, to see if they had a destination. I was amazed to see how these people interacted with each other. A pedestrian, crossing the road and getting hit by a car. An ambulance shows up and revives the person. A gang member shooting a gun causes motorists to drive erratically crashing into multiple other cars and causing mayhem. I concluded the game is probably a grid, like a railroad track these people were programmed to walk or drive on, but when forced to deviate from their programmed route was where it got really interesting, for example, one time a plane crashed causing multiple people to run frantically, and I chose one to follow. They ran and ran and decided to get off the road and head up a mountain. They topped the peak and proceeded to fall down the other side, repeating this over multiple ranges until I got tired of following. I've seen them decide to jump in the ocean and swim toward the horizon, and even randomly jump off a bridge. I understand how they can be programmed to follow a predetermined route, and even deviate to another route while staying on the grid, but some of them do things that kind of make me think they can make choices.
At the end of the day, I’m sure it's just my ignorance of programs and computer shit, but I did find it very entertaining to see what these people did. Eventually, I created my own games within the game, mainly a slasher game where I put on a mask and stalked people from the shadows. I’d wait until it was night, and I would carry a machete like Jason, and just follow people until I felt it was their time to die, and I would kill them. I’d walk through trees and backyards finding somone sitting on their porch or standing in their driveway smoking a cigarette, and I would sneak up and kill them. Sometimes I would just watch from the shadows. I wouldn't even be holding my controller, I'd just sit and watch the world exist because I wasn't allowed to watch my own… Or could I?
I loved walking around the areas that were just trees or hills, away from the city where the animals are, so I decided to go experience my own world again, against the wishes of the government. It’s not like anyone would see me at night, especially if I just walked around wooded areas. For some reason, I can't tell you why, but I wanted it to be as much like the fake world I had been living in as possible, so I even ordered a mask like the one I had been wearing. I put on clothes similar to my character and walked out my back door and into the woods behind my house. The cool breeze was refreshing and the sky was so clear the moon lit up the forest. I had no clue how deep it was but I knew it was deep enough to not worry about cops seeing me and forcing me to return to my prison. For hours I just walked around, admiring nature, all the while wearing a mask and gripping a machete. All of a sudden, through the trees I saw an illuminated floating window. It was too dark to see the house until I got to the wood line. I wondered what the people inside were doing. What they might be up to. I fought with myself in my head about going and finding out inevitably choosing to have a peek. What's the worst that could happen? There were no trespassing signs and the way the law works is you have to be told not to be there by the police before you can get in trouble. The thought of this person having a gun crossed my mind but not before my legs had started walking across the yard. At that point it was already too late, not to mention, I didn't really care. I wanted to see what they were up to.
Only one window was lit up and it was the perfect height for me to peek through. I crouched below it and slowly rose to look inside. It was absent of blinds but it had curtains that were slightly pulled apart, a kitchen window. A woman was doing dishes as her kids were sitting at the table finishing dinner. I wasn't sure if her husband was home, or if she even had one, but I was satisfied with what I saw and decided not to find out. My heart was still racing As I walked back through the woods. This was exhilarating, but as the adrenaline started to wear off, I started to realize I didn't know my way back. I wasn't worried. I happened to have the Google Earth app and knew it would help me find my way home but when I lifted my mask to look at my phone, I realized 2 things. 1, these woods were pretty big, but not that big. Maybe a square mile surrounded 15 houses along its border. 2, it was only 10 o'clock. I obviously didn't have to go to work the next day, so why not check out another house before I call it a night?
As I made my way to the east side of the woods I started to question if what I was doing was wrong. Sure, I could lose the machete, but in my defense, originally I just planned on walking around the woods. I couldn't kill someone. Not in REAL life. But what's the difference between this and simply looking out your window at your neighbor's house or staring at a jogger a little longer than normal? I was just getting a closer look. I decided to lose the machete in case I was seen and continued through the woods until I saw light dancing through the trees. The smoke smell in the air told me it was a fire up ahead and when I approached the woodline I could see a shadow moving back and forth. I crouched down low and parted the bushes to see a barrel with a blazing fire, and a man carrying a cage. I couldn't see what was inside but once I heard the meows I had an idea. He opened the cage pulled out a small cat, maybe a kitten, placed it in a burlap sack, and tossed it in the barrel. The meows turned to screams and it was so loud I had to cover my ears. I quickly turned and darted back into the woods.
I felt horrible, but what was I going to do? The cat was already in the fire so there was no saving it. The screams echoed through the woods for maybe 20 seconds, and then it was quiet. I had heard that sound before thinking it was just some cats fighting or something. How could someone be so fucked up? I mean, I know I can't say much, I’m watching people from the woods with a mask on, but I’m not burning cats alive. I couldn't get home fast enough. I crawled into bed and forced myself asleep so I didn't have to think about what I had just seen and thank God I didn't have any nightmares about it. The next day, I woke up instantly thinking about it but the shock of it had kinda worn off. I felt a little numb trying to understand how evil like that could exist, but I carried on with my day eventually forgetting about it altogether.
When the sun started to go down, I reentered the woods, this time with a route planned out. I’d check out 3 houses a night, all on different sides of the wooded patch in case I were seen I would be out of the general area, and also to learn my way around the woods so I didn't have to rely on Google to tell me where I was at. The first house was dark and the absence of cars in the drive led me to believe no one was home or maybe it was unoccupied. I didn’t approach the second house due to a man working in his garage. The car he was working on was nice and had him so preoccupied he didn't even notice me watching from the open door. I lingered for a bit and then headed off to my final house before calling it a night. I could hear the whipping sound before getting close to the house. My jaw dropped inside my mask when I looked through the window and saw where it was coming from. A man in a wheelchair, and an older woman wearing a face of pure anger, gripping the belt. He sat in his chair emotionless as the woman repeatedly hit him with the belt. He didn't even try to fight back, and honestly, I don’t even think he knew what was going on. The lifeless look on his face told me he was an empty vessel, a health condition the woman resented for whatever reason. I wanted nothing more than to bust in and stop her, but was it my place?
I wanted to take my mind off of what I was seeing, and the image of the woman and her kids came into my mind. I wondered what they were doing… Maybe something normal that would make ME feel normal again. I made my way to the yellow house hoping the wholesome view of a loving family would prevent any nightmares the scene would cause, but when I got close I could hear the yelling. She did have a husband, and they were arguing. Looking through the window, I could see her crying in the kitchen, the man towering over her with fury in his voice. The kids weren't there but it was 11 pm so I assumed they were asleep, unable to hear the anger filling the house. I didn't like how he talked to her, but again, what could I do?
For weeks, I watched the evil that dwelled in the houses surrounding the woods, walking through the dark trees with negative sounds echoing through my head. Images of people, hurting each other, or themselves. 15 houses, very few pleasant to watch, or anything that could be considered normal. Every Monday, a sound echoed through the forest. I felt it starting to change me, drive me crazy but at the same time, cause me to feel numb. So much pain in such a small area, the craziness inside every box with a door. How much more was in the rest of the world?! What even was normal? I made a decision. Sticky notes.
“Hurting yourself isn’t the answer”
“How would you like to be in a wheelchair?”
“You'll burn next if you don’t stop.”
Messages no one would report because they’d have to explain. I approached the yellow house to leave my last note. “Treat her better”, that’s all it said. Maybe it would be enough. Maybe if these people knew someone was watching they would change their ways. His car door would be the best place for this one. As I stuck it on the handle, I could hear the yelling. He was always yelling, and drunk. It was worse than usual because I could hear things being thrown and slammed. I peeked through the usual window just as he flipped the kitchen table and backed her against the wall. He raised his hand, bringing it down across her face. She hit the floor as he stood over her. He took another swig from his bottle before striking her again. Between every angry sentence, he would hit her. He was going to kill her!
Before I could even think I had kicked in the door. Before he could even turn, I had picked up a chair and swung it at his head. He hit the ground and the woman started to scream even louder. I looked down to see the blood pouring from his head. I dropped the chair and ran back into the woods, her screams fading the further I got.
I got home, hid the mask, and bit my nails to the nubs waiting for whatever evidence I left behind to lead the cops to me. Any trails I made over my weeks of walking through the woods, like breadcrumbs for the police, but they never came.
The next day, every news channel played the same story. "Man killed by a masked vigilante." The woman had told the story, exactly how it happened. How he was beating her mercilessly. How she feared for her life, and how a masked person had come in to save it. I wasn’t proud of what I had done. I had taken a man's life. What if he was only going to hit her one last time and be done? Did this man really deserve to die? It wasn’t my intention, and no amount of Reddit or social media posts praising the vigilante made me feel better about what I had done.
The truth is, I'm not a vigilante. I’m not Superman and I'm definitely not God, so who am I to change what I feel needs to be changed? To redirect a timeline that would otherwise never exist. If there is a God, who am I to change what he himself doesn’t deem worthy to alter? So from now on, I just watch… Or not... One thing’s for sure, the longer I do this, the easier it is to not look away.
SHORT FILM at:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKzkNB9Df_Y

Shortform

• Massive exploration of the Society beyond the big names we've spent time with in Across
• Villains forsaking their rivalries for survival and universes paving their own roads
• Gwen temporarily eating it but coming back, then leaning on her comic self (A variant)'s new Ghost-Spider ident to mark her defying fate's scythe

Premise

Here is the textual taxonomy of trilogys as I've heard in (obscure, hard-to-find) writing structure lessons

• Installment 1: Exposit - What is the subject
• Installment 2: Analyze - What is the subject's meaning
• Installment 3: Perspectivize - What is the subject's value and suasoria

Across may not have been a conclusive Act 2, but it is definitely a valid standalone one

• Expanded the 'verse and the major cast by throwing a curve into their relationships and own philosophies
• Delved deeper into what makes a Spider-Man by presenting a free will vs. determinism arc a la Civil War that also happens to have metacommentary

"I'ma do my own thing."
"We're supposed to be the good guys."
Miles summarized his new path throughout the movie, then Gwen called out the Society for their enabling of so much death and suffering to serve a misguided dogma.
Processing img 3dfm3svn964d1...
There's almost certainly gonna an all-out ideological civil war (fists or not, composite of MCU and comics, but Spiders-only) like that split poster teased.
Gonna be grimly hilarious seeing Spinneret/Spiderling fight Peter B. and Mayday (the former are on Miguel's side to the left, along with Insomniac Spidey)
Yes, I believe there will be a few more new support characters in Beyond - there's a reason certain folks were at the front, and it's just really curious and a wasted opportunity that this Spider-MJ didn't interact at all with this active version of her other (stillborn) daughter or her (Mayday-616B) dad.
I very much appreciate the lifting of other Spidey variants to the zeitgeist fold - Noir, Ham, Gwendy-65, the UK/Punk and Indian ones, the weirdos like Parkedcar from Not! Pixar's Cars, a damn popsicle possibly (lol), a plushie, etc. - but they

Events and Themes

1. Universes

Serving the Installment 3 role, Beyond will probably tie up loose ends and make the above themes reverberate across universes. Like, for 42:

• Miles Prowler can prove that the world doesn't always need Spider-Heroes to save itself, only the spirit of the concept - Spider-Man isn't the center of the multiverse, and given the last movie's title, it will navigate its own fate independent of any Spider at all - let the world do its own thing

Beyond the 'verse of men of spiders, Reality-42 rises up against villainy.

• Maybe Kingpin and Dr. Octopus return someway, then emulate their TAS 1994 counterparts in allying with the Spiders out of existential pragmatics

2. Characters and Developments

By "reverberate," the Spider-Hero question is going to strike real nerves that change the Society and the world, making them examine the morality of the war they fight against anomalies like Spot; survival at all means and costs vs. idealistic stand against fate. And for certain Spiders, we could get more screentime with certain Society members and ex-members - preferably Spinneret and Spiderling, the Insomniac Spideys, and Scarlet Spider - and Endgame-ify Beyond's length.

• The RYV (Reality-18119, Renew Your Vows) Parkers confide with the others including Peter B. on family and how do they keep it together in light of their role as preserving fate and existence itself
• PS4/5 bros relate their experiences of loss and keeping going, especially to 1610B Miles. A great way of giving a layman on the games' plots while relaying their themes to the wider non-gamer audience
• Ben Reilly (Scarlet bro), being a Pete clone and a technical predecessor to Miles, will have his status put to address. His struggles with his inheritance and identity - bearing the names of Peter's parental figures - will probably mirror Ultimate Spider-Woman, and hopefully, he's a major outcrier against Miguel's misguided cause
• Jess-332's and Peter B's babies will interact, leading to the former's moral realization due to Peter B's time with Miles being the reason for his family's reconstruction - influenced solely by extrauniversal (of course anomalous) factors. Throw that Madame Web Spidey (Julia Carpenter) into the fray somehow?
• Interuniversal linkage like in the comics (616/928 and 65/8) can be explored to further the fate-changing theme; whether 928B the bad future of 616B is an inevitability - we haven't really explored 928B - and whether 42 is 1610B's worst possible self and how it can change. The Miles/Gwen dynamic could play here too, 65B and 1610B and the references to the number 8 (which happens to resemble the infinity sign - "infinite Spider possibilities") in Across. Not suggesting that Comics Earth 8's characters play any role, tho, 'cuz per the themes, the duo should connect on their terms
• Variant Miguels when, Sony - like the variant MJs, Harrys, Normans, Flashes, and Gwens, etc. Get freaking Edge of Time, not just Ultimate and 1994, in it
• The locked-up anomalous villains perhaps even helping stop Spot - like Kingpin and Ock above. Basically No Way Home's scenario but tweaked a bit and writ large; let them decide whether to have a new lease of life or to keep their exploits going - their outcomes, their terms as usual. I wonder how would Atari Osborn fare, though, XD

Feel free to add more :) Not quite a Marvel binger yet, XD

3. Fates

Another element to be addressed is the room elephant of canon events. Their loopholes, their flexibility have to be expanded upon: They are fluid like time's arrows and oceans. For one:

• George lives? Sorry, but Gwen's relationship with him remains strained, on top of her guilt from treachery and deception. Also, the canon event ain't really death, but the Captain losing their job

Maybe we even trade one event for another, as in a major death of sorts. In my opinion:

• Not Peter B., because he's a living meta rebuttal to people holding off (at the very least) on an aged-up/married/parent Peter, the 616 editorial included. Him dying, let alone Mayday (toddler, so definite write-off), would undermine this subtext
• Not Jess, 'cuz she's a mother and despite her jerkish mentor habits seems willing to look the other way for turncoats like Margo/Byte
• Not Jeff, 'cuz that would just prove Miggy's point in light of George being living proof, as well as utterly render worthless all the effort thrown into saving him
• Not Miguel (yes, how dare I), 'cuz for all his pain-motivated harshness, he deserves better than the cliche'd fatal redemption trope of villains, of which he technically ain't one (and don't "Thanos" this as unlike Migs, he knew of better options but foregone it)

Here's a unique twist: The mastermind behind this Spider- conspiracy grows a conscience after all the breaking lectures against his warped view of canon events, then resolves to save as many lives as possible, dropping all pretenses of controlling the Spider-War
At risk to himself, he'll unhesitatingly save lives while one/some of those who blindly followed him give theirs. As shitty as his Society's turned out to be, they still have their main directive of fixing multiversal incursions, and someone has to keep giving the orders, someone with the most drive and commitment (especially for atonement)
Why on Miguel? Matured thinking aside, it evokes how science and philosophy works; cognitive science has this cliché of at least two sides theorizing extremes that are contrary to one another, and as time passes with discovery, the proof points to both sides having a point and deciding on a compromise; this of course goes beyond simple personal disagreement
So who'll it be?
Spider-gents and ladies, none other than Gwendolyn Maxine Stacy of Earth-65B
In the vein of MCU Aunt May being her Pete's Uncle Ben delivering that responsibility quote, and through it occurs the Spider-Verse's true Ultimate Fallout/Death of a Spider event this way
Gwen being slain and (certainly) coming back would be a wakeup call to both her world and the Society, as well as the latter group's morality in their internal strife and conflict against Spot. Redeem her image to everybody, Miles included, while allowing them to get together on solitary terms
That way:

• Miguel's right that being a Spider is a sacrifice, it's just their assigned canon events ain't 1:1 across every universe
• Miles' right that you can have and eat two cakes - meaning canon events can be alleviated (such as debris falling on Singh without killing him) - it's just that there's a cost

It'd also be a roundabout redemption for blindly following the Society's beliefs and causing unnecessary pain to Miles, deeper than "My well-meaning side right, your well-meaning side wrong" - no, both sides can have their two cakes; say, the rest save Jeff, Gwen herself - the motherless one - saves Rio, let 1610B not be 1610A in this particular way
I'ma spitball here, but it's kinda like Nolanverse (TDKR) Batman, come to think of it. Maybe George is informed of and reveals his daughter's "demise" and publicizes her ident? The latter I admit is questionable
Maybe Gwen goes to 1610B and RVs with Miles to Florence - there's this café on the banks of the Arno - for a fine evening sitting there and ordering a Fernet Branca
XD

(Potential) Foreshadowing

• Proof for the 42 antiheroes' case:

... "We wanted to craft this moment where Miles encounters this powerful figure in his life that he loved so much and he lost," says director Justin K. Thompson. "That's when he realizes that he is not really in his own dimension, as well as the gravity of what he has lost. In this reality, Aaron had to shake off his life of crime and became a surrogate father figure to Miles."
... In this alternate reality, the Sinister Six have been able to flourish and take over the world. "Criminality runs rampant," says Thompson. "We wanted to create a world where it felt like Aaron and Miles G. Morales of Earth-42 [this reality's counterpart to Miles Morales] are the only heroes.
Zahed, R. (2023). Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse: The Art of the Movie. Abrams Books. THE WORLDS → Earth-42, p.190
... This version of the character was never bitten by a radioactive spider and doesn't have any superpowers, but he has fallen into the role of becoming the vigilante the Prowler, under the tutelage of his uncle Aaron. ...
Zahed, R. (2023). Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse: The Art of the Movie. Abrams Books. THE WORLDS → Miles G. Morales: The Prowler, p.200

• Here's a pattern: We meet multiple Spidey-Peters and our intro hero is, well, RIPeter, then some podcast revealed we'd be meeting multiple Gwens in Beyond; timestamp 17:51-18:45

Interviewer: Will we see other multiversal variants of Gwen Stacy in the future even if they don't have spider powers, like you do with MJ, Uncle Aaron, and Miles?
Lord: Currently yes. ... But there’s one I’m very excited about.
Miller: Yes, yeah, I know exactly the one you’re talking about.
Lord: You know the one I’m thinking of, which is based on... I’m not gonna say anything, I’m not gonna say anything.
Miller: But it is sort of plot-integral, I would say.
Interviewer: If there are other multiversal variants of Gwen in Beyond the Spider-Verse, will they impact her arc, her relationship with Miles?
Lord: I would say yes.

The Pete variants showed up after Blondie's demise, so they might reverse the sequence here - as I said, a bookend.
Yea, all these signs totally bode well for the other blonde Spidey here
Processing img kpz7vzvub64d1...

• Friendly reminder they referenced fuckin' Ultimate Fallout of all storylines in Gwen's room, under which she mostly lingers while speaking with her dad. Are you telling me that scene just happened to be shot like that? No, they orchestrated it! L&M! The story that deals with Miles' overall debut and the (of course, cue pathos) fallout of 1610A Spidey's demise! Been struggling to find and spot it honestly, damn lighting and coloring
• Guess what's 1610A Pete (the original Ultimate comics version, not blond RIPeter)'s death age? 16, exactly 65B Gwen's present age. MCU Pete's too when he was snapped
• Notice the last part of the Canon Event exposition scene; Hobie's got the Spider-Man No More comic panel, Jess-332 the If This Be My Destiny one, Peter B. the wedding, and Gwen? Spidey rising from the grave in Kraven's Last Hunt, modified with herself doing the feat. The kicker here: Neither Hobie nor Gwen's displayed events have official releases yet, although Hobie did say he opted out of chasing Miles - which is to say she's next and last, as well as #4 (so deathly the connotations) on the shown list

In Defense

Now calm down before you web pitchforks on me

• People keep saying there has to be a much more nuanced wrap-up - an idea with traction around these subs in a good way; to this day, people argue whether that Mumbattan hole was Spot BS or a canon event's unraveling. Mine has that nuance IMO
• Migs up and stated Mumbattan wasn't their first canon event ruptures rodeo and they couldn't save some 'verses from them, why would he be bullshitting or even fully wrong on CEs if he had that Spider team with specialized equipment for canon event containment? They were conveniently there right as that hole formed, and hell, they could reconcile that hole with the Dead Migs dimension where everything digitally evaporates as the latter being the end result
• He put on his shitlist Spider-Holland (maybe along with Maguire, Garfield (the light one)) for a reason - not hesitating to save MCU MJ (Michelle Jones-Watson) rather than let her be Spider-Tom's ASM-121 moment - although one can argue the memory wipe counts as first love loss, along with his Iron Man being his police captain canon event - and Raimi-verse Gwen is very much (per that meme) hot, single, and alive. Observing Sinister, Supreme, and 838/Illuminati-Strange's destroyed realities made him a rage button for 2099
• Showing the other 'verses like the comic-based What Ifs and that Armored Spider-Man one from the 1994 cartoon? It's kind of like a cheat out of the dilemma, and I'm not sure the other viewers would agree. Miguel also knows of Dr. Strange and possibly his What If? versions
  • Before someone "Absolute Points solve themselves, Society's unneeded" me, we know too the APs are a nascent concept and Miguel probably thought no two universes will always solve themselves and CEs are probably spontaneous - maybe a day, a week, or even a year plus, they will happen, scapegoat or not
  • To the people who say Migs was mistaken in how he destroyed that reality and that it was an Incursion: IT WASN'T ONE, because it would have caused a collision course between that 'verse and 928B, which I don't think they have any means to stop - only someone like Strange. Aside from the trolley sacrifice of one Earth, we're not privy to what are the other seven ways to averting Incursions. Guess what, Gabri's reality went poof on its apparent own while 928B stayed very much alive. Didn't even look like 928B was approaching from the skies at the time either
  • Returning to Miles' side, I also hear of the fixed time points comparison from Dr. Who; I'd like to point out the Doctor was able to fake his death by hiding inside a, uh, humanoid ship at Lake Silencio, so I've read, despite records saying so
• They keep insisting "First time for everything," right, plus the cake stuff? Why not a Venom Blast resuscitation somehow on the brink of death, then being comatose or some other critical injury so the "lost Lenore" event doesn't stick? Or! In the style of BvS Dawn of Justice and What if? Spider-Man The Other (plus Ultimate Gwen ofc)...symbiotic resurrection (possibly even transporting that one symbiote drop in that bar in the MCU), and cue Gwenom arc in some spinoff like Spider-Women
• Alternatively, to avoid the fridged LI trope absolutely, Rio gets the Ultimate comics treatment of death somehow - but as said repeatedly, doing one's own thing, and I think this Spider-War's seen enough dead Moraleses. Miles has already grown and seen enough from the other Spiders' losses and his own. Honestly, people need to hear comic quotes often, take Mark Waid's Daredevil run:

Rachel Cole: You know what gives me the strength? My loss. We're alike that way, I imagine. Admit it, nobody who's a stranger to that particular pain could ever be as driven as us.
Daredevil: Never... Don't you ever say that to me ever again, that is a repellent statement, it's a vomituous insult to every cop, every fireman, every soldier alive who steps up to fight for those who can't! I am sorry for your loss, but if you genuinely believe that only the death of a loved one can motivate a human being to take up a cause...then get your pathetic cynical ass out of my way so I can do my job!

It's relevant because Rachel's stance here was that people like them who fight for causes are solely inspired by loss, only for Matt to verbally skewer her. The subtext here, synthesizing it with the Spidey mythos is that it's misguided to think that losing forever more loved ones is the only way to make a true Spider-Hero.
Flip the narrative and say "Villainy only happens if they're abused/poorly raised, alas, poor villain;" one is warranted to call it a vomitous insult to every abuse victim/improperly raised junior out there who became better than their elders/superiors - i.e. not go evil.
Either way, the greater gist of this is losing a close one for good isn't the way, emphasis on "for good"

Future Implications

Wrapping everything up like above (I mean the objectives), one way or another (not necessarily mine), would show full commitment to the theme of forging one's own destiny right down to the metatextual. The Spidersoc let confirmation bias blind themselves to possibilities and seemingly have yet to expose themselves to the preestablished branch realities where, say, Spider-People lose nobody or a Gwen Stacy ties neatly her romance quest with a Spidey. The themes of doing your own thing openly and honestly and in safety - rather than requesting permission from broken systems - resonate much with an Excel list: People who are queeof colowomen/disabled
Beyond that obviousness, we have disabled Spideys, Muslim Spideys (that female UK one), Blob-fat Spideys - even PLUSHIE Spideys, just to name a few, all to show the movie being the most diverse and inclusive Spidey work to date. These themes are so incredibly applicable to the lives of atypical people or otherwise people who live under systems that aren't designed for them to succeed. IE: POC, women, queer people, people with disabilities, etc. One can argue "doing your own thing" was what made ItSV such a breakthrough success and a decade phenomenon: Everything about the animation
I get that a teen girl dying, even temporarily - especially one who resonates much with LGBT (transgwender specifically) themes - is real bad optics, but we went through this before with Luz Noceda (bi rep exactly) from The Owl House, and things landed on their feet :)
If/When she comes back to crimefighting, this would be the moment she goes by Ghost Spider like her A self - a Gwen who fought fate and died for it, but another Spider loved her so much, he raised her from death to life in Ultimate defiance (getting flowery prose here) that prevails