I am 7 months pregnant and my supervisors and me were really close we are a company of 4 people. Recently they got an insurance quote that was affected by me having a suspended license. This is the first time since finding out my license is suspended that I’ve had a sense of urgency to get it reinstated. I immediately went to the DMV took the written and scheduled my drive test for the 29th which they were made aware of. So last Friday they called me into the office and said they thought they gave me a two week deadline to obtain. Never was that said so they gave me till July 1st to obtain my license. They also wrote me up for it. This Saturday we had an event which I was supposed to be the only one working outreach. They told me they expected me to Uber to the event Saturday but they also expected me to have two tote boxes a wagon and medium box. They told me I can drive myself to work and home so I figured the event was the same I’m not technically on the clock till I arrive and will be off the clock when I leave. So I drove myself. The boss showed up to the event. I think just to be nosey. So she texted me after the event saying “I noticed your car in the parking lot did you drive yourself?” After talking to my mom and godmother they advised me to lie lol and just say no. So I did and my boss then replied “yes you did” to which I replied “I’m sorry I read the message wrong. What is the real issue here? I feel like I have been doing everything you asked of me. Is it because I am pregnant? I feel like the energy has changed since I’m getting closer to delivery” she said “ it has nothing to do with my pregnancy and we’ll talk about it Monday.” I really feel like telling them about themselves but I know that won’t be effective. Since they don’t offer fmla I am thinking it might be more beneficial to receive unemployment while on maternity leave. I do graduate with a business degree in September and would like to find a new position and spend sometime with my baby. Anyway my question is how should I approach my discussion with my boss? How should my attitude be? What should I say? Advice please?

Donald Trump, as you have certainly heard by now, has been convicted. The verdict is in: Guilty - guilty on all 34 felony counts of running for re-election. Because that, after all, is the actual crime that Trump committed. It’s the one and only reason that this case was ever brought. They prosecuted him for trying to be president again. That’s the actual reality, that’s the real crime - which isn’t a crime, but, you might still be wondering, on paper, what crime was Trump just convicted of? Somehow, a day after the guilty verdict was read, the actual crime he was guilty of is STILL very hard to say.
Now, one possible theory is that the government of New York really doesn’t like it when people overpay their taxes. They’re the first government in the history of the universe that actively punishes its citizens for handing over too much cash. It drives Alvin Bragg absolutely crazy whenever that happens, apparently. If New Yorkers pay the government too much cash, then the full weight of New York’s criminal justice system will come crashing down on them. A jury will convict them in a day and they’ll face several years in prison - this is how desperately New York doesn’t want money from its citizens.
Now, that’s what you have to believe if for some reason you’re still pretending that there was any legitimacy to the show trial of Donald Trump that concluded on Thursday in Manhattan. I’ve been thinking of the best way to illustrate just how unprecedented and disgraceful the trial was—there are so many possibilities to choose from—but I keep coming back to this one point because no one else is really talking about it, and it puts this whole debacle into perspective.
In order to convict Donald Trump, it was not enough to show that he had supposedly falsified a business record; the government also had to show that Trump had falsified those records in furtherance of some other crime, but what was that other crime? The prosecution hadn’t suggested anything. We made it all the way to closing arguments, and still the prosecution had never explained what the CRIME was that the defendant had supposedly committed.
But during those closing arguments this week, a prosecutor named Joshua Steinglass finally offered a theory. He said that Donald Trump had falsified the business records in order to violate a different New York state law that prohibits the use of “unlawful means” to promote any candidate for office. But that still leaves a key question unanswered: What WERE those “unlawful means” that Trump engaged in? So you keep peeling the onion back to find what the hell crime Trump is supposed to have committed, and you continue to come up empty.
So Steinglass didn’t say definitely what the unlawful means were, but he did mention a few possibilities, and one of these possibilities was that Trump had violated New York tax law. Now, when you hear that, you might think, well, they’re alleging that Trump is engaging in tax evasion. But they’re actually alleging the opposite. They’re accusing Trump of NOT evading taxes.
Specifically, Steinglass argued that Trump’s 1099 form was inaccurate because the payment to Michael Cohen was actually a reimbursement, and not compensation as the Trump Organization had reported it. But if that were the case, then the government—under its own theory of how Trump’s team should have filed the paperwork—would be getting less money out of the deal because they’re not owed income tax on reimbursements. They’re only owed income tax on compensation.
Now, I went through the transcripts and found the quote from the prosecutor because when I heard about it I couldn’t believe it was real, but it is. Here’s what he told the jury:

It’s true that the result of this improper accounting is that the taxes would have to be paid that weren’t owed. You don’t have to pay taxes on a reimbursement. … So the result of reporting them as income is more taxes are getting paid than are owed. But, as the Judge will tell you, it’s a crime to prepare false tax documents, regardless, even when doing so does not result in the underpayment of taxes.

I’ll repeat that last line:

It’s a crime to prepare false tax documents, regardless, even when doing so does not result in the underpayment of taxes.

So translation: It’s very possible that the jury just convicted Donald Trump for falsifying business records in order to cover up the fact that he overpaid on his taxes. That is one of three possible “grand conspiracies” that were alleged here: a dastardly scheme to funnel too much money to the government. This is the villainous behavior that we’re supposed to believe is a threat to democracy. That’s what justifies potentially imprisoning the man who is leading every major poll to become the next president of the United States. That’s what supposedly necessitated doing something that has never been done before in American history, by charging a former president with a crime.
Now, kust for good measure, if the jury didn’t buy that theory, the government and the judge gave them a whole menu of other options they could choose from, and one of them related to covering up violations of campaign finance law, while the other was covering up violations of business records laws.
In other words, as Tablet magazine put it, the jury could have found that:

Trump falsified business records to conspire to steal the election by falsifying business records.

Now, which circular, incoherent conspiracy did the jury buy? Who knows? The judge didn’t require them to make that decision unanimously. Each juror could have picked a different crime to convict Trump of committing. We may never know.
So to restate: The upshot is that a former president—and the leading presidential candidate right now—was just convicted of 34 felony charges by a jury of his political opponents during an election year based on a novel legal theory where the underlying alleged crime was never clearly explained and might not even make sense. And on top of that, the jury didn’t even have to reach a unanimous conclusion about it. So 12 members of the jury are walking out of the trial with, potentially, 12 different and opposing ideas about what crime they just convicted a former president of committing.
Now, all that’s to say, there are not enough words in the English language to describe what a travesty of justice this case was. Trials like this are what define the third world. “Show me the man, and I’ll show you the crime,” as the saying goes. With this trial, Alvin Bragg—who ran for office on the platform of going after Donald Trump—managed to come up with a Frankenstein fake crime for the sole purpose of fulfilling that campaign promise. And it wasn’t just a promise to New Yorkers that Bragg fulfilled, it was a promise to Washington.
And if you don’t believe that Biden’s DOJ had anything to do with this case, I would refer you to the video of Alvin Bragg gloating at a press conference on Thursday, after the verdict was announced.

“I did my job. Our job is to follow the facts and the law without fear or favor, and that’s exactly what we did here, and what I feel is gratitude to work alongside phenomenal public servants who do that each and every day in matters that you all write about and make the press, and lots of matters that you don’t. I did my job, we did I our job, many voices out there - the only voice that matters is the voice of the jury, and the jury has spoken.

Now, the man to Alvin Bragg’s right in that video is named Matthew Colangelo. He happens to be a former high-ranking Biden DOJ official who left that job in December of 2022 to work as a senior counsel with Alvin Bragg in the Manhattan D.A.’s office - in fact, he was the number-three guy in the DOJ, before he took a massive demotion to work in a much smaller local prosecutor’s office.
Why would he do that? Is he just really passionate about impartially enforcing bookkeeping laws in Manhattan? Now, the New York Post did some digging on Colangelo, and that doesn’t seem likely. It looks a lot more like Colangelo took the assignment to serve as the Democratic Party’s hatchetman to take out Trump. Quoting from the Post: “The DNC paid Matthew Colangelo $12,000 in January 2018 for ‘political consulting,’ Federal Election Commission filings show.” He was also an Obama donor. And this is the man who went right from Joe Biden’s DOJ to Alvin Bragg’s office - right around the time that Bragg was reportedly waffling about bringing charges against Trump.
Now, you could choose to believe this is all a coincidence - maybe, you’d think, Matthew Colangelo would treat a Democrat in exactly the same way as he treated Trump. If a Democrat supposedly falsified some business records, then Colangelo would be hot on their heels. But that really doesn’t appear to be likely, either.
In 2022, while Colangelo was still at the DOJ, the Clinton campaign and the DNC struck a deal with the F.E.C., after the F.E.C. alleged that they had falsified campaign records. Quoting from the A.P.:

Hillary Clinton’s 2016 presidential campaign and the Democratic National Committee have agreed to pay $113,000 to settle a Federal Election Commission investigation into whether they violated campaign finance law by misreporting spending on research that eventually became the infamous Steele dossier. …The Clinton campaign hired Perkins Coie, which then hired Fusion GPS, a research and intelligence firm, to conduct opposition research on Republican candidate Donald Trump’s ties to Russia. But on F.E.C. forms, the Clinton campaign classified the spending as legal services.

Well, that sounds a lot like what Donald Trump was accused of doing, except much, much, much worse. The Clinton campaign allegedly falsified records to hide their involvement in spreading the Russiagate lie. And that was the lie that dominated the political landscape for, what, six years? It led to thousands of fake news articles and investigations and ruined the lives of several people who worked on the Trump campaign, but NO member of the Clinton campaign was ever hauled before a jury for falsifying records or for doing anything else. Matthew Colangelo never even dreamed of prosecuting them. And of course, neither did Alvin Bragg. The Clinton campaign and the DNC just paid a fine and the matter was resolved, that was it. There was never any criminal prosecution, much less talk of prison time.
But in Trump’s case, the media is now doing everything it can to convince Americans that, according to established legal precedent, Donald Trump must go to prison for this fake crime. That appears to be the next step here.
CNN trotted out several panelists yesterday to make that case:

“…you could home arrest, every option is on the table with a class-E felony like this, but I wanted to just put a perspective for people of what any other defendant, because I worked in the D.A.’s office for about 30 years - I’ve seen hundreds of thousands of cases and sentences, and those are the factors that would have gone into that equation, and absolutely without a doubt, any other defendant who was similarly situated to Donald Trump, who is not going to show remorse, and who, I am sure, will push the bounds of the still remaining gag order after this. We’ll see what happens, but anyone else in that position would get prison.”
…
PANELIST 1: “Here’s what I discovered: that in the most serious FBR cases, a sentence of imprisonment is routinely imposed. This is the most serious falsifying business records case in the history of the state of New York - I think Alvin Bragg is gonna ask for a sentence of incarceration, and I think Judge Mershawn will very seriously waive that…”
PANELIST 2: “So the special, you’re saying, would be if he were NOT given a prison sentence.”
PANELIST 1: “Right.”

If you believe anything that you just heard there, then you are too stupid. You’re too stupid to tie your shoes in the morning, most likely. These panelists want you to believe that Trump is getting special treatment in New York if he doesn’t go to prison - special treatment in a positive way. They’re gonna do him a favor. This is a city where you don’t even go to prison if you pummel old ladies in the street! This is a city that is profoundly reluctant to send ANYONE to prison for ANYTHING, even and especially for actual violent crimes committed against innocent people! But this business records case is on a whole other level, they say - the most serious business records in the history of the state! So serious that they can’t even tell you what the crime was, even now, after he’s been convicted of it! Trump didn’t show remorse for this fake crime, so he needs to go to prison. That’s the logic, as Soviet as it is; we’re supposed to believe that’s the normal outcome in a case like this, but it’s not.
If you look up recent prosecutions in New York for falsifying business records, you’ll find that virtually ALL of them involve allegations of tax fraud or workers’ compensation fraud where the defendant made money. For example, there was New York v. James Garner, a case from November 2021, in which a, “Mental health therapy aide was indicted for allegedly defrauding over $35,000 in workers’ compensation benefits;” there was also the case of New York v. Josue Aguilar Dubon (from October 2022), in which, “A Bronx business owner was indicted for failing to report over $1 million in income, avoiding paying $60,000 in taxes.” Now, on their website, the outlet “Just Security” has tallied many other examples like this, but again, the point is that these people allegedly lied to obtain more money.
In his case, as I said, Trump OVERPAID his taxes, if anything. So his prosecution is highly unusual for that reason alone, and that’s not the only strange aspect of the case, of course, it’s also more than a little odd that the same judge who handled this hush money trial is also handling the criminal case against Steve Bannon AND the criminal case against the Trump Organization. And this judge just so happens to be a Joe Biden donor. Is this normal? The CNN panelists wouldn’t say, but we all know the answer.
They gave EVERY Trump-related case to one single judge, and it just so happens to be a judge who donated to Trump’s political opponent. They aren’t even trying to hide what they’re doing; this is the kind of political corruption you might read about in the Gulag Archipelago. And up until now, you’d read those stories, as I did when I first read the volumes of the Gulag Archipelago several years ago, reading those stories and thinking, “Wow, well, I mean, thank God nothing that absurdly corrupt could ever happen here.” And here we are.
With the Trump trial, the Left has trampled every norm that exists in the criminal justice system. They prosecuted the leading presidential candidate in an election year for a seven-year-old fake crime - they assigned a hack judge to the case who essentially guided the jury to a conviction, and they did it all in front of a jury in one of the most partisan places in the country.
A few weeks ago, one prospective juror who disqualified herself from the trial gave an interview in which she explained that, after meeting the other jurors, they did not seem completely impartial to her:

REPORTER: “This is Kat, she runs a VC fund here in Manhattan for folks that are over 60 years of age - she was just dismissed as a potential juror, what happened, why were you dismissed?”
JUROR: “Because I couldn’t be impartial.”
REPORTER: “You couldn’t be impartial, so when the judge asked at hand, ‘can you be impartial,’ you raised your hand and you said you cannot.”
JUROR: “Exactly.”
REPORTER: “…do you feel like the people that you were speaking with in that jury room that you sat with all day on Tuesday, that they can put together a fair and impartial jury because of that sense of duty, do you think that’s possible?”
JUROR: “I’m not sure about that.”
REPORTER: “Really, why?”
JUROR: “You know, everybody has biases and, you know, you know, stereotypes in the minds, so you have to be a really, you know, deepened, you know, fair person… it was just very hard to do, right? [unintelligible] I hope they do. I mean, this is justice, right?”

Now, there’s some speculation on social media that this woman might have leaned towards acquitting Trump, but we have no idea - the fact she’s speaking to MSNBC would suggest otherwise, but the key point is her first-hand observation of the jury, which is that they might not be impartial in this case, and we all knew that, of course. It was always impossible—quite literally IMPOSSIBLE—that Trump would get an impartial jury. IMPOSSIBLE that he could have a fair trial, impossible! Nobody on Earth is impartial to Donald Trump, and if such a unicorn does exist, they don’t live in New York City.
But this illustrates a key difference between the Left and the Right, which is that in general, the Left is committed to winning at all costs; they’re happy to seat biased jurors and judges to get what they want. Meanwhile, conservatives are preoccupied with “norms” that nobody else in the country cares about.
Republicans could have arrested and charged Hillary Clinton for any number of crimes, at any point in the past decade. They could’ve pursued her for the Steele Dossier F.E.C. charge I mentioned earlier, investigated the Clinton Foundation, prosecuted Clinton’s retention of classified materials (followed by her lie to the FBI during an interview about those materials), but Republicans didn’t do any of that - on the basis that if they do that, then Democrats might return fire. And so Republicans continue to cherish our “norms” while Democrats blow the norms to smithereens with a thousand sticks of dynamite.
Now, the necessary response is obvious, although it won’t be pleasant. Donald Trump should immediately create and publish a list of ten high ranking Democrat criminals who he will have arrested when he takes office. First on the list should be Joe Biden; second should be Joe Biden’s crackhead son.
And in the meantime, Republican AGs all over the country should pursue their own indictments. Border states should charge government officials for deliberately contributing to human trafficking at the southern border. And if Donald Trump’s “hush money” was illegal because it interfered with an election somehow, then so is importing millions of foreign nationals every year; that’s the biggest form of election interference imaginable. Time to empanel a grand jury right away in the reddest city in the reddest state on the map. Better issue a gag order on Joe Biden, too, for good measure. Take corrupt Democrats—corrupt Democrat criminals—put them on trial in front of juries that already hate them before the trial even begins. That’s what needs to happen. Now, does that mean that we are “stooping to their level”? No, it means that we must stop pretending that we live in a country that no longer exists.
Now, will any of this ever come to pass? We’ll see. It’s doubtful. But it’s the only viable option. Right-wing lawfare is what’s necessary to defeat Left-wing lawfare, there is no other way about it. The entire legal system depends on a series of unstated principles - that prosecutors won’t pursue political cases, that juries will be impartial, that crimes must be clearly defined; and once one side violates ALL of these principles, then the principles cease to exist for everyone. They’re gone. They do not exist anymore. And now it’s mutually assured destruction. But that’s a deterrent that only works if there’s a real possibility that it’s actually enforced. And after what just happened in Manhattan, it’s well past time to introduce the Left to what “mutually assured destruction” might look like.
So frankly, I don’t want to hear elected Republicans complaining about this verdict - I don’t need to see their tweets and statements condemning it. They’ve already put out all the statements and all the tweets - I don’t care! None of us care! We’re not impressed with that! If you’re an elected Republican saying, “I oppose this!” and you’re going on Fox News, great! Good for you! The only thing that we want to hear from these people is which Democrats they will have arrested. Don’t tell us that you’re sad about the verdict, we don’t give a damn about your feelings. We want to see corrupt Democrat criminals frog marched on camera in handcuffs. Don’t whine about the double standard, force the Democrats’ own standards on them. Drag them there kicking and screaming. And if you won’t do that, then just shut up.

My parents had me late in life. My mom had me in her late 40s and my dad was in his late 30s (he's 10 years younger than her). When I was 13 my dad's health problems started, when he was going in for surgery he pulled me aside and said I was the one responsible for pulling the plug if anything went wrong, not my mom or 18 year old brother but 13 year old me, because I'm less likely to make am emotional decision. Luckily he pulled through just fine.
When I was 19 and in college, I began taking care of my parents. My dad had more health problems so I'd drive home every night for 3 hours to help with the business and do whatever care they needed, then I spent all weekend with them. I literally had 0 friends in college, and this continued through both grad school programs. I even made the 12 hour drive each way every Friday to care for them on the weekends when I moved to a different state. Both my mothers parents had dementia or alzheimers during this time.
I began to notice similarities in my mom to how my grandma's diagnosis started, it began with small memory issues, but kept growing. When I was 26 in 2016, I moved back home and a month later my dad had a heart attack, he survived. Since then I lived with them and was a 24hr live in carer essentially. I was never allowed to leave the house and again, had literally no one to talk to except them. I did some contract work for companies and one was so impressed with my research skills they offered me first Crack at a job that would be $200k a year, but I'd have to move. My dad essentially told me, I'd never be allowed contact with the family if I moved, so I turned it down. My mom began progressing in her disease and the doctor still refuses to diagnose her. I eventually, at 32, found an amazing job 3 states away that my parents support. I still drive home every weekend to care for them since it's been one health crisis after another. Even when I had a health crisis, I still had to drive to care for them. My mom was sympathetic but never remembered a conversation after 5 minutes. She's easily confused and will repeat herself 7 times in an hour long conversation, it gets annoying for me. I try to be understanding but I feel my nerves are frayed. I feel bad for her, because she is aware of the problem, but she can't do anything about it.
I have a friend here that I made recently, though I've began to drift away from him. He's handsome, kind, friendly, has a great career he worked hard to progress in and is just an all around great guy. He asked me out and I turned him down. After a few days he respectfully wanted to know why, mainly if he was too pushy or coming on too strong. I told him that I fully expect my parents health to decline so badly in the next 5 years that I'd have to move home to care for them. I don't want to start anything knowing there was a time limit on it. He said what if he'd move with me, and I replied that there was a chance he'd have to start from the bottom again at his new job and I don't want to be responsible for that sacrifice. That's how I left it and began to pull away. I've always had issues making friends because I'm so shy, we just clicked when I had to work with him for work. However, he said that I can't live my life like this letting my parents situation control everything and alienating myself from everyone around me. I'm 34, I've been doing this since I was 19. I don't know how to be otherwise. I've never gone to a bar with a friend, I've never gone to the movies, or a sports game, or even a concert when I was past the age of 14. We lived in the middle of nowhere, so far away from everything that my parents never wanted to go anywhere. I don't know how to behave otherwise.
I guess I'm asking, am I in the wrong for being like this? What do I do? How do I live my life knowing what's coming and knowing my brother can't care for my parents? Also, we can't get a new doctor because there is only 1 within an hour of my parents home, but he said he refuses to diagnose people with dementia/alzheimers? What do I do for that?

Hi everyone. A few months ago I made this post as an update to my residential cleaning business journey. Well, I've made the decision to put an end to that journey and shut the business down. This was not an easy decision to make. I noticed a lot of people got value out of the last post, so I felt compelled to make this final update.
To preface everything, one of the main reasons for me making my original post had to do with the fact that, generally speaking, when I saw content on the internet related to cleaning services it was very reductive of the difficulties that one actually faces when starting up a business. I won't deny that I was sold on this idea of "Create website + Put a business on Google LSA + Hire contractors = Big Moneys 🤑" I thought this would be a pretty simple come up, but I learned quickly that that's not the case. Below I'll talk about why I’m leaving, go over some common myths I see, and what my future plans are, and some other stuff.
I hope that this post reaches anyone interested in doing this business — not to deter you from doing it, but rather as a forewarning for what you may be getting into. (Hint: It's not sitting on your ass all day while contractors and VAs do the work for you.) I think there’s a lot of value in learning from other people’s experiences and mistakes, and please remember that this is just my personal experience — results may vary.

Why did I start a cleaning business in the first place? Why am I leaving now?

Truthfully, I had dreams of achieving “financial freedom” and living the good life. I wanted to build "passive income" while enjoying a relaxed life, living where I wanted to, driving what I wanted to, and ultimately doing what I wanted to. In the guru space, the cleaning business is sold with these dreams in mind, and I genuinely believed that it was the path that I was headed down. It was only a matter of time and hard work. Looking back now, I realize these reasons were a bit superficial. Not necessarily in and of themselves, but as a premise for getting into this business. This led to me realizing something really important, that is probably the underlying lesson learned: If you don’t have passion or genuine interest, you will probably burn out. If you don’t burn out, then honestly more power to you. For me, I reached a point where I had to ask myself if this was what I really wanted to do. If, for potentially the next 5-10 years, I would be happy and fulfilled with this pursuit. As you now know, the answer was no.
Now, I definitely consider myself entrepreneurial and I love business — it energizes me, it’s one of the few things I find truly engaging and get excited about. But one of the main reasons I’m shutting down is that I have zero passion for this business at all. I actually did some cleanings myself in order to learn what was going down, and I absolutely hated it. I went out and put flyers on mailboxes and hated it. I hated talking about my business to people. I hated being the little guy on the block while the franchises and the 300+ five star review businesses were booming with business. I don’t think many people talk about this, but getting over this curve at the very beginning is really tough. Not just in a business sense but also psychologically — you’re really grinding from the ground up. I also have zero connections in the area, so I couldn’t really ask around for referrals to build upon. So yeah. I knew all of this at first, and I thought I’d be able to toughen through it. But again, I think it comes back down to the lack of passion that I had. I didn’t have it in me to push through, probably because deep down I didn’t really want to. And I think that’s okay. You’re allowed to not like stuff. I'm still happy that I went and did it instead of always having wondered “What if?” There were a lot of good lessons learned from this experience.

Grievances

Now, I want to dive into some of the specifics. Particularly, I want to debunk some of the things I hear and don’t hear from content creators, gurus, and people on the internet.

1. The Contractor Model & Getting Employees

This: I genuinely don't understand how people get away with doing this. When I started off I used contractors and found it VERY difficult to control the quality of work, as well as ensure what would actually be done during the cleaning, whilst maintaining a legal relationship with contractors. As I'm sure most of you know, you can't provide training or anything like that to contractors, and it's a bit harder to hold them accountable. If you see my last post you'll see some of my horror stories from the beginning (stealing cash, messing up cleanings), and in the end there wasn't much I could do about it. I decided to work with some part-time employees, but this honestly opened up a whole new world of problems to be solved. Getting supplies, where to store supplies, learning about the chemicals, training the cleaners, what exactly to include in cleanings, getting payroll stuff set up, managing the cleaners, etc. to name a few. Keep in mind that prior to this I had no experience with actual cleaning outside of cleaning my own home. So I knew there was a mountain of learning ahead of me. Which is fine, that’s how starting a business is. Except for one thing: this technically wasn’t “part of the original deal.” I was just supposed to do business stuff, and let the cleaners clean. The majority of online guru advice you see just simplifies this into “hiring contractors,” or even to take it further it’s just a matter of “getting good employees.” There’s actually so much more that comes with it though. This was one of the biggest factors in me deciding to stop the business, again tying it back to the lack of passion. When it came down to me actually learning the cleaning stuff, I hated it. So keep this in mind. If you do want to go the employee route, you might have to get into the trenches yourself, and you might find out that you do not actually like it. Again, a lot of these internet personalities claim to use contractors and have really successful businesses. I mean I guess it technically is possible, but I felt really anxious about not having quality control over what’s going on, and having that lack of security. There’s really nothing stopping a contractor from fucking you over. I know it’s the same with employee, but it still feels a little different by principle. Dunno. If it’s really working for them and anyone else, more power to them. The employees that I did have were great, but they were family friends so it came with a bit of strings attached and there were just some nuances that I won’t get in to.

1. The Intimate Nature of the Business

This is something I rarely hear talked about online. This is relevant to both the business aspect and the cleaning aspect of things. From a business side, it’s actually kind of hard to convince people to let complete strangers come in to their houses. I know it seems intuitive but again, I never hear it mentioned. Pair it with the fact that you’re a newer business with <20 reviews and you’re going up against long time businesses: Who do you think people are going to choose? Who would you choose to clean your house? I’m definitely not saying you can’t build your reputation up, but it takes a lot of work and grit. It’s not just “Slap your business on Google LSA and your phone will ring off the hook!” From a cleaning side, it is soooo much different cleanin in someone else’s home than cleaning your own home. I hear people say all the time how “they love to clean” and what not. I like to clean too, my space is pretty well kept. But when you go into someone else’s space and you have to get up close and personal with their mess, with their problems, with their own life, it’s really a different experience. Maybe some people don’t feel this way but this was a huge problem I had. It’s pretty difficult psychologically. Granted, I had one really, really bad experience with this but I’ll save it since this post is going to be pretty long as it is. (If you want to hear just lmk in the comments.)

1. Dealing with People

This isn’t really addressed by the guru’s. Dealing with people is not always that easy. Everyone has their own preferences, they want extra this, extra that, discount this, add on that, etc. It’s not always going to be that you have a good client that’s straightforward, wants to book, and goes through with that booking. Again, it seems pretty obvious, but it’s rarely mentioned. If you’re not that comfortable with sales and talking to the variety of personalities that the world has to offer, this might be something that’s difficult to deal with.

1. Being a Solopreneur

Not directly related to the residential cleaning business, but it is tough doing this on your own. For context, I’ve had a couple of ventures in the past that I did with friends that didn’t end up working out, but I always carried this sentiment with me that I could run a business on my own, and that I would do it more efficiently, it would be easier, etc. I can’t stress how difficult it is when you’re liable for everything that’s going on, and you have no one to help. It sucks. I’m glad that I learned this lesson, but damn my respects to solopreneurs out there, you have to be really mentally tough for this.

Final Numbers

I’m not going to go into much depth with this. I did a little spreadsheet last post but tbh I don’t really feel like it this time (sorry). We ultimately did $4.3k in revenue, and around $5k in expenses, including maybe like $1-2k of my own money that I sank into this. Honestly not a huge loss considering how much some people invest into their businesses from the jump. I’d say it was money well spent considering the lessons I learned. I will say this: If you do start something like this, don’t listen to the guru’s that say “You need this booking software! This accounting software! Etc! Etc!” I honestly sunk a lot of money into that stuff, and in hindsight I probably could have gone this whole time without it. Yes, it’s nice when you do have it, but it’s not really worth the cost when you don’t have much volume to start with. I think I had the idea in my head that I was going to be booming with business so I needed to “be prepared.” Honestly, take care of the absolute necessary’s first (LLC if you want, insurance, bonding) and get the extra stuff once it actually makes sense.

Consider your background

I think this is important to touch upon. There’s a narrative that I see that goes something like this: "Degrees are worthless, plumbers, electricians, lawn care owners make six-figures. You should do the same!” And then I guess presumably you are supposed to hear this and follow a similar path. As you know, I kind of fell into this narrative. I figured cleaning can make good money, the numbers made sense, so why couldn't I do it? Let me say something really quickly though. You might not be cut out for this kind of thing. I definitely wasn’t. I’m going to be honest, I don’t come from riches but I do come from middle class: solid upbringing, good university, parents got me a car in high school, you know the vibes. I usually had to work jobs to support myself, but I had a cushion to land on if it really came down to it.
Now, let’s think about the demographic that ends up doing these harder, boots-on-the-ground, laborious jobs: e.g. Plumber, electrician, lawn care, house cleaning, (I’ll just refer to them as “blue collar” jobs for the sake of brevity). Oftentimes, it’s not people that end up with business or accounting degrees, or even get the opportunity to pursue higher education or whatever. Not that that's a bad thing, but it's just what it is (or what I've noticed at least).
Like we established, I do come from the latter category, and as we know, I (and I’m now seeing many others online) tried to do a little segway into the former category.
I say all this to say, that you need to think long and hard about if you’re actually cut out for this. Because blue collar work is no joke, and if you think you’re just going to waltz in and play Mr. Capitalist and rake in a bunch of money while others do the tough work, you should reconsider what happens when it comes time for you to step in and get your hands dirty. For anyone that doesn’t actually know, cleaning a house is hard asf. If you’re considering going into this business, I encourage you to try deep cleaning a house that isn’t yours. You’ll see. This whole section might be personally anecdotal, and I hope that this doesn’t come off as patronizing, but I see a lot of people similar to me thinking that they can just follow the magic formula presented online, not realizing that they're entering a whole different world. After all this, I have even more respect for people that do blue collar work, boots on the ground, every day. It’s a grind that a lot of people will never know or understand.

So what’s next?

It’s definitely bittersweet leaving the business. Despite not going on for long, I put a lot into it; it’s pretty much everything I thought about for the last few months. I had a lot of hopes and expectations for this to not only work out, but I also thought I was going to become rich af lol 😂 I’m not saying it’s not possible, but please be wary that you will not get rich quick. At least not without being unethical in some shape or form. Up until now I’ve only really done small businesses for work. It’s provided a ton of unique experiences and lessons that were priceless and that I’m extremely grateful for, but it’s been extremely exhausting and stressful doing this for the past few years. I’m still pretty young, and I think that after learning everything I have, I’m ready to try to segway into some career of sorts. I’m looking heavily into a sales career (maybe tech). I think it would be really nice to hone in on one particular skill (rather than try to manage ten things at once), and I like how transferable sales is, in case one day I do decide I want to come back and try my hand at another business. I’m sure this isn’t the end of my entrepreneurial journey.
Anyway, if you made it this far, thank you so much! I know this was kind of a long post but I wanted to get everything off my chest and get some closure with the business. I genuinely do hope that this provides some value and insight to someone. I get a lot of my own information from people’s stories on Reddit and conversations with them, so I hope I can return the favor. I look forward to your questions and discussions in the comments, and let me know if I can help you out in any way! Best of luck to everyone and their own pursuits :)

I (f20) just broke up a relationship of 2 years a little over a week ago. My friend since high school and roommate (f20) is back at home 4 hours away for the summer, and hasn’t contacted me since.
For context, I’ve been close friends with this person since freshman year of high school and now we go to college together. Within the past 2-3ish years, I feel like we just don’t mesh well in terms of some values and way of going about things. I’ve felt that throughout our relationship, she’s often made me feel disregarded and unimportant. We were apart of a trio of a sort in high school, and when I’ve brought up these feelings to our other friend she just generally tries to stay neutral, but still understanding, and I understand why she would. Throughout college my roommate has often gone back home or back to our other friend’s college, but I don’t as much because I’m often busy with school. They’ve grown a lot closer with each other which I can understand.
A few times, a little drunk maybe, I’ve brought this up with my roommate that I feel like I’m made to feel dumber or not as included but she defends it and says that it’s not at all her intention. Again, I can understand this as she doesn’t mean to, but it still does not feel great as it feels like nothing has changed.
She went through a very nasty breakup at the end of our 1st year of college and I was by her side through a lot of it. I’m not comparing it as to say she owes me anything, but it just hurts a bit to think about considering the current situation.
Our friend of the trio called me the other day to check up and I told her that my roommate hasn’t contacted me once, and she said I should communicate that. So I did, I texted her that she has not contacted me and it is hurting my feelings. She said that I’m so right and she’d call me at the end of the day, which she did not. Why this bothers me is because our friend of our hs trio and someone from back home, she would call and FaceTime all the time. And while she’s back home, she’s not working or doing any school to necessarily keep her busy.
I’m going to our friends birthday tomorrow, and my roommate will be there. I assume she’ll ask how I am, and honestly I feel a bit petty and don’t really want to explain to her. Not sure what to do or what’s healthy.
To be fair, we’re not really ones to text or call a lot, but I’m going through something so I feel as though it shouldn’t matter, especially since she’s not here.
I understand if I sound whiny, I hear it too.
TLDR: I have a history with a close friend/roommate of feeling unimportant and disregarded. She hasn’t checked on me since my breakup, so I texted her that it hurts my feelings and she still has not given me a call. I see her tomorrow at my friends birthday and I feel petty and don’t really want to talk to her about my breakup since it feels like she doesn’t care.

Burner account for obvious reasons.
My girlfriend and I were friends for years all through high school, but we only started dating in our final year. We’ve been together for about 20 months, and in that time, not much has happened to progress the relationship. She was always super busy with work and clubs outside of school, and her parents didn’t really like me, so we didn’t get to see each other much. Now that we’re free to do what we like, we still don’t make that much time for each other. I’ve also noticed a persistent lack of intimacy, which has only been made worse after we moved away to different cities for University. Going into the relationship, she said that she didn’t want to do anything super physically intimate in terms to begin with due to trauma, and I respected that. We still hugged and held hands and found ways to be intimate, but I guess I always expected we’d work our way up to something more. Now that it still hasn’t, I feel a bit empty and dissatisfied. It still just feels like we’re friends, and never moved past that.
My girlfriend also has a hard time opening up to me or talking about serious or emotional topics (due to the trauma), despite me reassuring that I’m open to listening to and actively encourage talking about our feelings. This further adds to the feeling that we’re not really a couple, just two friends who play video games or hang out from time to time and flirt over text messages. It feels hollow. I don’t know where I stand, and every time I’ve tried to talk to her about this it’s very hard because of her deflecting the conversation or the relationship not changing in any way.
She’s a great person and really fun to spend time with, but it’s just not working as a romantic relationship. I still love her and know I want to be around her, but this is almost unbearable. What would my next best step be? Do I try working it out again, or break up? How do I talk to her about these feelings?
Edit for clarity: we both start conversations, flirting, or when we’re in person, go for hugs or hand-holding about equally, so I wouldn’t say the relationship is one sided. It’s not like I’m dragging her along in this relationship, she is also talking to me constantly.
TL;DR: my romantic relationship with my girlfriend of 20 months doesn’t feel much more than friends, even after the time we’ve spent together. Now that we’re long distance the problems have only gotten worse, but I still love her and don’t want to lose her. What do I do next?

Edit: I'm in NYC
For a clearer back story you can check my post history. Long story short, contractor breached contract used concrete instead of leveling cement, no bonding agent on floor. The work was done HORRIBLY. I kicked him out. He has half the payment (1,100) and was nagging me for the other half. Which I am not giving him.
I got a couple of quotes on cleaning up the damage, about 3k. I asked him for a refund, and to pay for damages. He said "your a f**, your wife's the man your a waste of life".
I spoke to an attorney and he said he knows the name of the contractor. The dude is currently on probation, in 2021 he was welding roof shingles together with a butane torch and burnt half of someone's house down while they were in the middle of selling it. He also lied about being insured, and licensed. His probation is up in July.
Now, in order to take him to small claims I need an address. Every address that comes up for his "businesses" are Chinese owned households, he probably went through "sold" listings on Zillow and got addresses from there. He has three phone numbers, one in nyc (where I am), one in Buffalo and another NJ number. I never got his license plate but there's no front plate which makes me think it's a PA plate.
I have no clue how to find this guys location. A buddy of mine has a Spokeo subscription but all of those addresses he doesn't own. I drove by two of the address late at night but didn't see his truck.
How can I find this guy? I'm at my wits end.

My roommate (19F) just got out of trade school and is working full-time now as well as 20+ hours or overtime, and I (19M) work part time while also being a full-time university student. We have been friends a little over 10 years now, and have never had any issues or bad blood with one another until recently. We recently signed a lease and starting renting an apartment back February of this year and have been splitting rent and utilities.
For context, my roommate is very messy and very much dislikes cleaning, while I on the other hand am a compulsive cleaner. I like to keep things tidy and maintain a minimalist look due to my upbringing. We were aware of this before moving in together, and we had a system of checks and balances to keep each other in line. However, at a certain point (2-3 weeks after moving in together), I noticed that her room was starting to get really disgusting, with trash, dishes, clothes, and shoes completely covering the master bedroom floor, where you could barely open the door because so many clothes were just piled on the floor. We had a serious discussion about it, since I was worried about the possibility of pests entering the apartment, and we agreed that I would do my best to maintain her room since she has such a busy work schedule and doesn't quite have the time to maintain it to the best of her ability. Keep in mind, I was cleaning EVERYTHING whilst also purchasing 80% of the groceries, and also paying my share of rent and utilities while I have a part time job and am a full time student.
Flash forward to early May, we agreed that this ended up causing more unnecessary drama then both of us could tolerate, so we decided that it would be best if someone moved out. She thought it would be best for her to move out and get her own place, since most of the large pieces of furniture were mine and it would be more difficult for me to move out (her words). We agreed that she would move out starting on the 1st of July, as our friends (19F & 23M) lease was ending, and they agreed to move in place of my ex-roommate.
Last week, my ex-roommate decided to move out as she had found a new place, but promised that she would pay for the utilities for the month of May and the month of June's rent. The only thing that would fully be on me would be the utilities for June, since I would be the only one living there, which seemed more than reasonable to me. I called her today and now she is refusing to pay anything, including the utilities for the month of May when she lived here. I informed her that she is breaking the lease, and that 60 days notice had to be given. She also had never notified the landlord of this change, so he is unaware of everything going on. Her refusing to pay is putting me in a really bad situation, so I am heavily considering taking her to small claims since she is breaking the lease in multiple ways. AITA for this situation and WIBTA for taking her to court?

Next year we will be having a wedding in my family. So today my father called a wedding photographer team to inquire about the prices. They are a team of 5 people and for a ready 3 photoshoot, they are quoting around 75 K which we believe is quite reasonable.
However, here comes their unreasonable demands. They said we would need to feed them the same food as the guests. Also, we need to arrange cab facilities for them from their studio. We need to arrange a safe spot to store their equipment.
My question is why they have so many demands. We plan to arrange food packets for the guest drivers and all helpers. Why can't they have the same food as the workers and drivers? Why should the client be responsible for arranging the photographer's transportation? They can add the same in the quotation itself. Why should we bear their transportation headache, especially during a wedding when the whole family is busy?
Here are my simple calculations. Per plate food is costing is 3200. 3200*5 is equal to 16 thousand. One-way cab will be easily 1000. So 3 say photo shoot will be 1000*2*3 equal to 6k.
Am I sounding unreasonable or is this the norm nowadays?

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Hi! I am a 20 yo girl from Italy. I'll try to explain a bit of my background. Please note that this post will be mentioning weight, weight loss, and selfharm. English isn't my first language, sorry!
I have been diagnosed with BED and a depressive disorder - for how concerning that may sound, my psychiatrist is really vague and almost secretive about my diagnoses.
My psychiatrist is the chief psychiatrist of my local ED center; I feel very lucky to have begun my journey with her because she's really knowleadgeable, kind and (something I had never seen in any other psychiatrists) empathetic. However, because of Italy's regulations (or maybe this specific center's, idk), I had to be referred to an obesity center since my BMI of 38 was, quote, too high and "I needed to be treated by professionals in proper settings".
I originally thought I was bulimic (as other psychologists had told me), so hearing that I wasn't skinny enough to be treated by their psychologists and their team really took a toll on my mental health. I am glad to say, however, that the obesity center has WONDERFUL doctors and psychologists, and that I feel wonderfully taken care of, despite them being incredibly busy. I want to specify that this is all done in public healthcare (yay, free healthcare!).
Getting to the point, I have been in their care for almost a year (since late July 2023). Despite them being very careful to not overdo anything and always telling me that the point of me being in an obesity center is not to lose weight but rather to try to endorse a new lifestyle, I can't help but think I am not doing enough. I have since then lost only 10kg (about 20 pounds), but all of those have been lost July through October. Unfortunately, I also have to say that during that time period I frequently had selfharm problems, so I think I was in a completely different mental state.
Since October, I have not lost a single pound, but rather gained, because I have been binging SO often. When they ask me why, when, or with what I binge I can't even give an answer. It simply happens. I unfortunately have dissociation problems, but I really feel like I can't give any context to it.
I am on medication for my depression, but all of them are anorectics or have similar effects, so I know it's not my medication. I am now starting DBT therapy for BED - I'm grateful for the opportunity and hopeful this will help, but I'm dumbfounded. I don't know what I have been doing wrong these past eight months, because I feel like my mood has gone up, I am doing what I like and am in a very happy relationship, but there's still this.... problem, and it feels like whatever I do it just tends to get worse, never better.
While waiting for the DBT therapy to start, would there be anything that you recommend doing in the meantime or anything that has helped you, especially if you were in a similar position?

(20F) First of all I love my mom, but I know she knows she lacked a lot because everytime she gets trashed, and I'm at her apartment visiting she asks me "Was I a bad mom? I mean I know I didn't..." blah blah blah, I tell her to go to bed. I'm not about to be guilt tripped for telling the truth.
I can understand and try to move on, she has issues w unmedicated ADHD, had a horribly mean mom, extremely dependent on others, and is now 2 years clean but was addicted to just about every drug at some point or another (now just alcohol). It's just another level of frustrating when her Facebook is constantly pinging with quotes about how she wants to be remembered for "being there" and happy mothers day "to us superhero moms!".
My mom is textbook uninvolved parent, we never had any rules, and she never came to any of my school stuff. The night before my highschool graduation she sent me a text that she wasn't coming because she had a lot going on that week and it was stressing her out, no apology, nothing to make up for it.
My half-sister (16F) got cheated on recently and sent videos of her ex smoking weed to his parents and coach. I called my mom, and we started talking about it. She seemed a little concerned, and was basically half-jokingly calling my sister crazy ("You don't think it's a little much?"). My first thought was "yeah it's a little much I guess, but you didn't exactly raise her to work through things well???".
I don't understand how she doesn't know all of her kids are gonna be a little crazy because all of the adults in our lives were a lot crazy. My brother (who lived with our dad) was briefly addicted to Xanax in high school, and my mom started buying it for him!!! I'm so proud of how my little sisters are turning out, and I used to have so much anxiety about them when they moved states with my mom. I think we're all doing great considering.
What really gets me is, we were there. We saw and heard the stuff none of us talk about, we knew about the drugs, we all were scared too. Not only did our parents not teach us any life skills, but they obviously could not handle their own lives. How can they not recognize that? What role model would we have learned to be "normal" from?

I don't even know if I should be writing this. I am an 18 year old male living in India. Idk where to start with this. So I belong to a middle class family consisting of me, my parents and my younger brother. My life was fairly average till I was in 10th grade. I was academically good. Although I was not a bookworm but my classmates and my teachers considered me one. I was never athletic or took a lot of interest in co-curricular activities. I had lots of friends in school but now that I think of it, I never had any close friend with whom I can share anything. That is probably why I have to vent it out here. I was an ideal student (academically) who any parent would give an example of to their child. I was very conscious about my impression on the teachers because that was what was ingrained in me by my parents. My parents especially my mother was quite strict about my academics all through my school life. So I never got myself into any trouble or mischief and was a very well behaved boy. I was never bullied my by classmates. As I said I was never a bookworm and mostly studied a few days before the exams and got really good grades. I was not someone who would go to play after school. I just stayed in my home. My whole life was just school and home. From 5th grade, my mode of transport to and from the school was a private van. And there used to be two of those vans which commuted daily. I used to go in Van-1 from 5th to 7th grade. In 8th grade, my van was changed to Van-2. There I met a girl. I'll call her 'Chandni' for this post. She was not from my school. Since it was a private van, students of different schools used to be there. She was one year elder than me but was in same grade. We became really good friends over time. And I gradually fell in love with her. I obviously was never able to confess it. But I really enjoyed the time I spent with her. Then 8th grade ended and 9th grade started. And summer vacations came. After summer vacations when the school reopened, I was waiting for the van and Chandni was not there. I came to know her van was changed. I was devastated. I never knew I was meeting her for the last time before the summer vacations. I remember the last time I met her before the vacations, she playfully gave me a light tap on my head. I then knew she was active on social media. I joined Instagram and found her account. We chatted but not much. I remember I wished her on her birthday and now that I think of it, it was actually very embarassing how I wished her. Then gradually our conversations got less and finally stopped. They were very casual conversations. She definitely had a lot more friends and I was not as important as I thought I was. I was not upset over this. Then I think she changed her account or something and I didn't knew what her new account was. So our communication stopped. Then came 10th grade and COVID. I got busy in online classes and stopped thinking about her. Then came 2021 and my life took quite a turn. In April 2021, I randomly found Chandni's Instagram account. I sent her the request and she accepted it, even though my profile didn't have my photo and had a random name. I saw her profile, and again my suppressed feelings for her reemerged even more intensely than before. I left my old school which I studied in till 10th grade, and joined a new one. This is something I regret a lot. Actually the new school was a non-attending school. I joined it because I wanted more time to prepare for my medical entrance exam. So this way I just had to attend the coaching classes for the entrance exam and not go to school. Any Indian reading this would understand this situation better. Then my 11th grade classes started few days later which were also online because of lockdown. Initially I was very regular with the studies as I genuinely had passion for the subjects I had chosen. But this regularity lasted only 1.5-2 months. Then I started feeling very lonely as I started to lose contact with my friends from my old school. And also around this time my overthinking started. Initially it started with the fake scenarios I made in my mind involving Chandni. Now I am a vegetarian and Chandni is a non vegetarian. I know this seems very random. But this is from where my overthinking started. I started overthinking whether eating meat is ethical or not. I know this seems very silly. But trust me it was a very heavy thought for me and I just couldn't stop overthinking about it. Gradually I started overthinking about various things, if they were ethical or not, I started overthinking about religious things, god, philosophy, spirituality etc. These are some very heavy topics. Combine that with my loneliness and fake scenarios. This is where my downfall started. I didn't used to pay attention in the class and just used to lie on the bed and keep screenshot-ing whatever was displayed on the screen by the teachers. During the class I used to keep overthinking about above mentioned things, creating fake scenarios or just brood in my loneliness. I remember during the New year 2022, I was constantly watching different videos on youtube, where the spiritual gurus used to talk about masturbation and they obviously advocated against it. And watching them just made feel like I am doing something terribly wrong. And I remember how it made me so upset for few days. Chandni was in my mind 24x7. I never messaged her since I found her account in April. I just didn't had the courage. Or maybe I just wanted to get over with the entrance exam before confessing. I still used to talk to some my old friends on DM but they were very short conversations and quite rare. There was this one friend, we used to send each other funny reels quite often. Apart from that I barely had any conversation with anyone except for my family. All through the year I felt very guilty of not focussing on the studies but I just couldn't do it. My mind was constantly overthinking something or the other. Then came final exams of 11th grade. I was shit scared because I didn't study anything. All through my life uptil then I had passed just studying few days before the exams. But atleast I used to pay attention in previous classes which I didn't do this time. I still remember that anxiety. When you have been academically great from the start, your parents have high expectations from you. What would I tell them? It was one of the worst time of my life. But somehow I studied from Internet and passed the exams. Then came 12th grade. My parents had always been overprotective of me. They had never let me out of the house on my own. At that time, I didn't even know my own neighbourhood properly. This was something which always embarassed me. People my age were travelling here and there with my friends and I couldn't even get out of the house. In 12th grade, offline classes were started and COVID was pretty much over. It took a lot of pleading to convince my mother to let me go to the coaching on my own even though it is just 15-20 minutes walking distance. So I was in a room full of new faces and I was feeling very uncomfortable because I am not a very social person. And my height and physique were already an insecurity then (I will get to this later). Gradually I made some friends (Again not close friends whom I can share all this with). And honestly had a good time with them in the coaching. But apart from the 9:00 AM - 3:00 PM coaching, my life was pretty fucked up. The overthinking was still there. The fake scenarios were still there. At this point my behaviour started to change. I started to study on the 2nd floor in my home, so my conversations with my own family became very less. I used to come down only for food and sleep. Otherwise I used to stay on the 2nd floor. So I started to become distant from my own family. Add on the fact, that whenever there were mock tests in the coaching and if a test didn't go good, I used to get a scolding at home as I previously stated that my mother is quite strict about my academics. And she wanted me to clear the entrance in the 1st attempt. Also add in this the habit of my mother to constantly shout at small things. She doesn't particularly shout at me but in general. So yeah I started becoming distant from my own family. It's like I didn't have anything to talk about with them even if I wanted to. Uptil then I was like any other elder brother. I used to tease my brother, fight with him, but now I became distant with him aswell. It's not like I wanted it. But I just didn't have anything to talk about. Writing all this is just making me so sad right now. I had just become pretty silent at this point. Only little fun I had was in coaching with my friends. Chandni was still in my mind 24x7. Studies were again initially good but then I started procrastinating. I had become tired of life. Then as 12th grade started coming to an end I became more and more insecure about my height. I gave 12th exams. Passed it. Then I gave the entrance exam and failed to clear it. So I decided to take a drop (prepare another year for the entrance). This year (2023-24) has been the worst phase of my life. I was still distant from my family. The only thing we talked about was my study. All my previous year friends had now joined different coaching so I was very alone. My school friend who used to send me reels also stopped conversing because he got busy in his college life. So I had literally no friends. I didn't even tried to make any new friends this year because I was just tired. I didn't had any energy. My insecurities were killing me. I used to study on the second floor and the voice of my mother shouting and my parents arguing used to reach there and drive me mad. I was again not able to focus on the studies. Overthinking was still there. Fake scenarios were out of control. I just couldn't stop thinking about Chandni. At the same time I kept blaming myself for never being good enough for her and not deserving of her. I just used to sit in the class staring at the walls while everyone else is talking to their friends and enjoying. Seeing Chandni with other boys made my heart sank. I know they are much better than me but I feel fucking jealous. I don't have anyone to share all this with. I then somehow gave the medical entrance exam again a few days ago and I cleared it. I should be happy right? I am not able to feel that happiness for fuck sake. I always used to console myself that somehow clearing the entrance will fix everything in my life. But nothing changed. Here I am hating myself. Still my insecurities are killing me. My short height (5'4), my very thin wrists, my skinny body, make me feel so fucking insecure. I am tired of my parents constantly arguing about finances, I am tired of my mother shouting at small issues. I don't feel like going out. Sometimes even if I think to go out just to challenge my parents authority, I procrastinate that thought because I don't have any energy left to argue with them. It is not like my parents are bad. Maybe they won't stop me from going out, and I am just assuming they would. The thing is I don't have any excitement left for anything. The guilt of not being a good son, a good brother, a good friend is killing me. The guilty of not being good enough for the girl I have been secretly loving for 6 years is killing me. I still don't have the courage to confess to her because of my insecurities. I always feel weak, inferior to others and worthless. And the fake scenarios are still here. I don't know if they will ever stop. Earlier I had studies to distract me but now I have nothing, and whole day I am just thinking about my insecurities. Just before I started writing this, I was using Instagram and saw Chandni's likes on reels suggesting she likes tall men with manly hands. I don't even know if I am supposed to laugh or cry at myself. I don't know how to express myself. I still feel distant from my family even though we live in the same house. I feel extremely bad for sometimes shouting at them but I am just tired of this fucking life. The loneliness I feel, I just can't describe it.

My mom is a Black, single mom and it is just her, my sister, and I. We bought a house with a pool in June of 2023. My mom had been at her job for since Octoberish of 2022. When we first got the house everything was fine. Our next door neighbors have a pool company so we asked about maintaining our pool which they gave us. Like always, we have the lawnmower people come and now our lawn. Things went pretty smoother throughout August and then I went to school. In October of 2023, my mom was laid off and given a severance package of 3 months. When I came back for winter break the pool was frozen over. My mom told the neighbors around December that she has lost her job but that she still wanted help with the pool and was willing to pay. They helped us winterize the pool for free. My mom told me that the neighbors said they would help measure the pool and givean estimate for a cover for us but they never did even after my mom reached out a second time. My mom being cautious about money due to still not being able to find a job, decided not to do anything with the pool cover. Early 2024 she gets a temporary job but it pays significantly less and the severance money runs out. We can no longer consistently afford our mortgage along with the other expenses so we get approved for a 7 month forbearance Spring time arrives and the poil starts to unfreeze and gets green. We also found out that the pool motor no longer works. My mom calls some pool people and they are giving her quotes in the thousands and that’s money we don’t have. Time goes on and it’s mid May. It’s very hot outside and we notice the AC unit isn’t working. We call the HVAC people and they tell us that we need the whole system replaced and it’ll cost $10,000. We tried to get financing but my mom wasn’t approved. We had to go with a temporary fix which is still a couple thousand. Needless to say, my mom is now working a part time job that pays even less than the last one and is applying for unemployment. Meanwhile, we are still mowing our grass. One day we get a visit from someone from the fire safety about a complaint about our pool. The “anonymous” neighbor said that our pool could be a health hazard. My mom was upset that the neighbors would call the department on us instead of just taking to us directly especially when they knew what situation we were in. My mom didn’t want to drain the pool because she felt like with enough time she’d be able to get the stuff we needed to take care of it, but after this complaint she decided that we could at least shock it, so we did that. My mom went over to ask the neighbors if they called and they said yes and went off in her. They said that despite her financial situation she needed to deal with the pool because they were starting to see bugs and swans that they apparently have never seen before. They then went on to say that it wasn’t enough for our grass to be mowed and that our yard looks like shit and we need to get all the weeds pulled because we were bringing the property value down. My mom brought up the fact that they never helped her with the cover like they said they would and they said that she should’ve called (even thought she already reached out once). Mind you, they know about my mom’s job loss and my mom told them about or AC unit. They said that it didn’t matter and that we need to get out house together and that they would continue to call the department until the issues have been resolved. Now, listen, I understand that in the end when it started to get green we probably should’ve just drained it but given the circumstances that was really the last thing on all of our minds. It just sucks because we were really doing the best we could with what we had. I feel like they were wrong for treating us so harshly.

There's a lot more stuff i'm not addressing because that would literally force me to write out my entire life story but I'm sick to death of the abuse and I need real and genuine advice that isn't just "get yourself out of there bro"... That costs money, Money I don't have, Money I will never have because the job market in this trash heap of a "city" is barren and because of some stuff i'm gonna mention below...
She's used my name (since before I was 18) for accounts on websites to avoid credit checkers (or something like that) without my consent or explaining to me why she was doing it. Luckily this hasn't affected my credit score later in life or anything like that but it was still manipulative and shady and gave me immense anxiety (we'll get to that later)
She once got my father to basically beat the ever loving sh*t out of me (at her demands) and choke me out when I was 8-9 and kept me locked in my bedroom for 4 days whilst the bruises faded away (so the school wouldn't ask questions) because an older kid tried to drown me in the local pool and I bit him on the knuckle to get him to release me. When she "apologized" for it 15 years later, she said she was "sorry I didn't have all the facts and overreacted"... Still not sorry for kicking the sh*t out of me though are you? That was just 1 time but it was 1 time too many and i'll never forget those 4 days or the response my parents had to something so small. Even if your kid fucks up, you take their side and defend them. You ask questions. Don't just jump straight to abuse.
One time, she launched my PSP across the hallway because my foot squeaked on the leather of the couch (I was like... 7?) and she flew off the handle, ranting and raving and telling me i'm a piece of shit. Sometimes she will just fly off the handle for the littlest reasons and attack us (never my youngest sibling or the Autistic one (Which I find hilarious because I'm currently being diagnosed for ADHD as an adult, which she could've gotten me tested for sooner had she not been busy neglectfully mollycoddling them) and I've witnessed this since I was a child so as a result, sometimes I fly off the handle and I hate it, it makes me sick to my stomach when I get the rage. The difference is I never want to escalate it to physical violence, She will.
She'll do sneaky sh*t like ask for my help then f*ck up something small, then spin all the blame on me so that when I give up and tell her to f*ck off and do it herself she can claim that the real reason i'm angry is "because I Asked you for help!?" ... No, Because you asked for my help and spent the 5 minutes I was doing so insulting my intelligience and calling me a r*tard. Whenever we get into an argument she threatens to kick me out or get rid of the entire house. She uses the fact it's not my house against me the entire time but i'm the only one following the rules she's set for us. The others break the rules constantly and NOTHING is ever said about it. I had 1 bowl in my room and for a week straight all I got was "REEEEEEEEEEEEE NO FOOD UPSTAIRS"... my brother next door to me? (I counted) 13 Glasses, 3 Plates, 2 Pizza Boxes, a Take Away bag and a half eaten box of Donner meat... "TeeHee Lol Just Put It In The Corner I'll Take It Out Soon :)))". These Double Standards have always existed. She doesn't even live in the house I currently reside in, She lives with my father. She still comes round weekly to do house checks like an SS Officer and point out any issues... issues she doesn't have to live around in a house she doesn't even want...
She constantly puts her favorite children over the rest of us, hasn't even spoken to her oldest kids in like 5-6 years because they've all woken up and realized how big of a liar and manipulator she is. Their father wasn't a good man and he has snaked his way back into their life, He was abusive and a shit father. But instead of being the bigger person and accepting her kids want their father in their life, Or entertaining the chance that he may have changed, she basically told all of them to f*ck off and cut contact with them and refuses to speak to them.
I have severe anxiety caused by her and the way she raised me. I feel incredible guilt over things that I didn't even participate in. I want to be a stand up comedian but she never liked my jokes and constantly told me I wasn't funny unless I was reciting a Peter Kay (British Comedian for Boomers) sketch/bit, so as a result I have immense stage fright and performance anxiety. I've never been one for physical humor with friends because whenever I tried she'd pull me away, force me to never speak to them again and tell me "Those boys are mocking you! Can't you see! They're taking the piss out of you!" and I struggle to be intimate with women because she never encouraged me to pursue them. She would tell us from a young age women weren't worth our time and they were just sl*gs... (Thou doth protest too much?) So now I fear ever bringing a woman into my life because what are my options? either A) You are never meeting my family because they are all braindead abusive scum who will judge you or B) Would you like to meet my mother who will immediatelly become hostile to you, try to embarrass me and then try to ruin your life when we inevitably break up?
She's a classic example of what happens to someone when they have kids before they're ready, get stuck in a physically abusive relationship and develop a victim/survivor complex they never address or seek therapy for. She's mentally a teen. in my 26 years on this earth, I've seen her work 2 jobs. One she quit within 2 weeks at a Chip Shop because "The oil makes my psoriasis hurt :(((" and the current one she works which she constantly talks about quitting.
There was a 20 year gap between those 2 jobs and she uses "raising you" as an excuse... What raising? most of my memories are of you raging and fighting dad or staring into a TV for hours to tune out the screams...
Our family struggled financially for years, she put the weight of that burden ON US constantly. My dad worked 12 hours a day 5 days a week for bare minimum wage just to give her all the money and squander it on stupid shit, then she'd turn around after returning her 4th Patio furniture set of the year and cry and blame all of us because we had no money for christmas... My dad had no choice but to give her the money too because she signed her name off and micro-managed *everything* to do with the house and my dad wasn't financially literate.
I feel f*cking trapped. Whenever i've tried to escape her in the past i've only ever made my life worse and I've had to go crawling back to her. I've tried to genuinely improve my life but my luck is garbage and I always end up getting screwed by the system. I got a Visa and tried to make a life for myself in Australia but 4 months in I was basically homeless, living in a cockroach infested Hostel on very limited time and I had to go back otherwise I was going go insane. I have a Foundational Degree in Video Game design that's utterly useless because nowhere hiring game designers wants a foundational degree and after my experience with Uni (and the industry) I never want to work as a Game Designer. I took the degree because SHE convinced me it'd be good... it fucking ruined my mental health and I got kicked out because the Uni kept screwing me about during Covid and blaming me for things I never did.
The only consistent work i've ever managed to get is in Kitchen work and I hate it. I'm constantly belittled and never given a chance or given all the worst possible jobs because my anxiety prevents me from trusting myself or pursuing higher positions. I just want to be able to change my name, move to another country and never speak to anyone from this life ever again.
TL;DR: My Mother is Karen Hitler, a fountain of bad luck, and I unironically cannot wait for the day she dies from a stress induced coronary because then I can finally be at peace and be free from her suffocating talons.
People Say "Family is Everything". You Job probably calls itself a "family"
My family Manipulate, Gaslight, Rob, Lie and Backstab me so "Family" can't mean as much as people think.

Yes, I know this is a very common question on reddit, but I just want to get a second opinion from some fellow aviators. I live in southern Brooklyn, in NYC, and will begin working towards my PPL pretty soon. I have reviewed every possible airport in the area (HPN, CDW, LDJ, SMQ, FRG, ISP, Brookhaven, Westchester, MMU, you name it) and have narrowed it down to Somerset, Republic and Macarthur.
I will be commuting with a car, since the lirr and metro north makes it around 2-3x longer of a commute. I chose these airports because they are within a reasonable distance and the tolls aren't crazy (SMQ's hourly rates will make up for the toll). The flight schools I am looking at are Somerset Air Service, Long Island Aviators, and Mid Island Air Service. SMQ has a Piper Cherokee for $130/hr + $65/hr instructor (wet I suppose?), and LIA has a Cessna 152 for $135/hr (wet?) + $80/hr instructor. Mid Island Air Service has not yet told me how much they are charging per hour, but their intro flight is $150 for 35 mins "retail value $250", and they have a bunch of Cessnas. I live on average about an hour and 10 mins away from FRG, hour 40 from Macarthur, and an hour and 20 mins from smq.
However, all of these have some disadvantages. FRG is a very busy airport, MacarthuIslip is pretty far and pricy, and smq has a $25 toll round trip, which adds up. Overall, I'm leaning towards somerset, but I would be glad to consider any other ideas or even flight schools/airports.
Thanks

My mom is a Black, single mom (48 F) and it is just her, my sister, and I. We bought a house with a pool in June of 2023. My mom had been at her job for since Octoberish of 2022. When we first got the house everything was fine. Our next door neighbors have a pool company so we asked about maintaining our pool which they gave us. Like always, we have the lawnmower people come and now our lawn. Things went pretty smoother throughout August and then I went to school. In October of 2023, my mom was laid off and given a severance package of 3 months. When I came back for winter break the pool was frozen over. My mom told the neighbors around December that she has lost her job but that she still wanted help with the pool and was willing to pay. They helped us winterize the pool for free. My mom told me that the neighbors said they would help measure the pool and givean estimate for a cover for us but they never did even after my mom reached out a second time.
My mom being cautious about money due to still not being able to find a job, decided not to do anything with the pool cover. Early 2024 she gets a temporary job but it pays significantly less and the severance money runs out. We can no longer consistently afford our mortgage along with the other expenses so we get approved for a 7 month forbearance Spring time arrives and the poil starts to unfreeze and gets green. We also found out that the pool motor no longer works. My mom calls some pool people and they are giving her quotes in the thousands and that’s money we don’t have. Time goes on and it’s mid May. It’s very hot outside and we notice the AC unit isn’t working. We call the HVAC people and they tell us that we need the whole system replaced and it’ll cost $10,000. We tried to get financing but my mom wasn’t approved. We had to go with a temporary fix which is still a couple thousand.
Needless to say, my mom is now working a part time job that pays even less than the last one and is applying for unemployment. Meanwhile, we are still mowing our grass. One day we get a visit from someone from the fire safety about a complaint about our pool. The “anonymous” neighbor said that our pool could be a health hazard. My mom was upset that the neighbors would call the department on us instead of just taking to us directly especially when they knew what situation we were in. My mom didn’t want to drain the pool because she felt like with enough time she’d be able to get the stuff we needed to take care of it, but after this complaint she decided that we could at least shock it, so we did that.
My mom went over to ask the neighbors if they called and they said yes and went off in her. They said that despite her financial situation she needed to deal with the pool because they were starting to see bugs and swans that they apparently have never seen before. They then went on to say that it wasn’t enough for our grass to be mowed and that our yard looks like shit and we need to get all the weeds pulled because we were bringing the property value down. My mom brought up the fact that they never helped her with the cover like they said they would and they said that she should’ve called (even thought she already reached out once). Mind you, they know about my mom’s job loss and my mom told them about or AC unit. They said that it didn’t matter and that we need to get out house together and that they would continue to call the department until the issues have been resolved. Now, listen, I understand that in the end when it started to get green we probably should’ve just drained it but given the circumstances that was really the last thing on all of our minds. It just sucks because we were really doing the best we could with what we had. I feel like they were wrong for treating us so harshly.

My mom is a Black, single mom and it is just her, my sister, and I. We bought a house with a pool in June of 2023. My mom had been at her job for since Octoberish of 2022. When we first got the house everything was fine. Our next door neighbors have a pool company so we asked about maintaining our pool which they gave us. Like always, we have the lawnmower people come and now our lawn. Things went pretty smoother throughout August and then I went to school. In October of 2023, my mom was laid off and given a severance package of 3 months. When I came back for winter break the pool was frozen over. My mom told the neighbors around December that she has lost her job but that she still wanted help with the pool and was willing to pay. They helped us winterize the pool for free. My mom told me that the neighbors said they would help measure the pool and givean estimate for a cover for us but they never did even after my mom reached out a second time. My mom being cautious about money due to still not being able to find a job, decided not to do anything with the pool cover. Early 2024 she gets a temporary job but it pays significantly less and the severance money runs out. We can no longer consistently afford our mortgage along with the other expenses so we get approved for a 7 month forbearance Spring time arrives and the poil starts to unfreeze and gets green. We also found out that the pool motor no longer works. My mom calls some pool people and they are giving her quotes in the thousands and that’s money we don’t have. Time goes on and it’s mid May. It’s very hot outside and we notice the AC unit isn’t working. We call the HVAC people and they tell us that we need the whole system replaced and it’ll cost $10,000. We tried to get financing but my mom wasn’t approved. We had to go with a temporary fix which is still a couple thousand. Needless to say, my mom is now working a part time job that pays even less than the last one and is applying for unemployment. Meanwhile, we are still mowing our grass. One day we get a visit from someone from the fire safety about a complaint about our pool. The “anonymous” neighbor said that our pool could be a health hazard. My mom was upset that the neighbors would call the department on us instead of just taking to us directly especially when they knew what situation we were in. My mom didn’t want to drain the pool because she felt like with enough time she’d be able to get the stuff we needed to take care of it, but after this complaint she decided that we could at least shock it, so we did that. My mom went over to ask the neighbors if they called and they said yes and went off in her. They said that despite her financial situation she needed to deal with the pool because they were starting to see bugs and swans that they apparently have never seen before. They then went on to say that it wasn’t enough for our grass to be mowed and that our yard looks like shit and we need to get all the weeds pulled because we were bringing the property value down. My mom brought up the fact that they never helped her with the cover like they said they would and they said that she should’ve called (even thought she already reached out once). Mind you, they know about my mom’s job loss and my mom told them about or AC unit. They said that it didn’t matter and that we need to get out house together and that they would continue to call the department until the issues have been resolved. Now, listen, I understand that in the end when it started to get green we probably should’ve just drained it but given the circumstances that was really the last thing on all of our minds. It just sucks because we were really doing the best we could with what we had. I feel like they were wrong for treating us so harshly.

I've (M21) known Kenny (M21) for almost three years now and we've been living together for a little over one year with a friend of his, Steven (M21), from high school.
We were all planning on going our separate ways this July, since I graduated and they want to get a different house. I've been the "manager" of us three since I'm the oldest and have had the most experience in a shared living situation that's not with parents or in a college dormitory. I always took care of bills, fixed broken appliances, and cleaned when no one else took initiative to do any basic maintenance. We also have some sort of inspection coming up that the management company we're leasing under was pretty vague about, and since we did inherit the house in an extremely subpar state (I know, we should have taken care of that when we had the chance), I was pretty nervous about the house being up to standard.
I've spent the past couple days cleaning because I was incidentally planning on being out of town from literally now probably until the inspection happens later this month, and I wanted to do my share so my roommates wouldn't be left to take care of everything. While washing the carpet stairs, I had made a mental list of things I wanted to get done, but I wanted roommates to participate too just so I could make sure they'd be set on a good path.
I really didn't want to micromanage, but I've especially had problems with Kenny just not picking up after himself. He never seems to accept responsibility for things. For example, he's the only one who's used the stove pretty much all year, but it's always filthy. I've repeatedly asked him to clean it, but he never does. He's taking summer classes so I'll give him that, but all he ever does is play video games. I'm honestly tired of feeling like I'm the only adult in the situation and I would have liked to not be responsible for other people.
So when I was washing the stairs, I asked Steven and Kenny to help me clean and I'd take some money off the bills they owed me. Steven was reluctant but I knew he'd be able to be convinced. Kenny, however, immediately got defensive, saying he already does stuff and that he's busy studying. Him studying is a lie... I could clearly see a video game on one of his monitors and a movie on the other. He didn't say he was taking a break from studying, he said he "could've been" studying, as if to say "you don't know what's going on, F off." I wasn't buying it. I told him that he could at least be doing something productive, but he said he doesn't want to overwork himself. I get that, but sweeping for two minutes is not in any way "overworking" oneself. He then again brought up the fact that he does do stuff around the house, so I brought up the stove again. He said he's been in Vegas the past week so it couldn't be his fault that it's dirty, I said that it is his fault cause I had been asking him to clean it for a couple months at this point. He then mentioned that it was clean when he left, so I told him that it's because Steven wiped it off after using it once, which Steven was there to back that up.
So that's when Kenny exploded. He got out of his seat, yelled at me, pushed me, and put his hands on my throat as if to try choking me but at the very last second restraining himself (keep in mind even though I was clearly upset I had not raised my voice). He didn't hurt me, but Steven pushed him off of me and I said "what, you're gonna strangle me now?" To which he replied "Yeah, and it'll be worse if you don't shut up."
It could've been the heat of the moment, and it probably wasn't a good time to bring it up then, but I told him that he really needs therapy of some sort. I absolutely didn't mean that as a diss, I genuinely think him putting his hands on me like that is a cause of concern. I even told him that I could give him my therapists number. He then went off on a rant attacking my character, saying that everyone thinks I'm weird and I think so highly of myself despite living a "loser life." I wasn't offended by any of it, and like I said, I probably should have avoided kicking the proverbial anthill by mentioning therapy, but this seemed like another unreasonable response and could even come from something deeper. I didn't say anything past that, but I can't help but think he has some stuff that needs to be figured out. I don't want to overstep any boundaries so I won't push it any further, but AITAH for bringing up therapy? Or for anything else mentioned?
P.S. This isn't meant to belittle Kenny or his personality. We have different interests, hobbies, and lives, but I think him and I are a lot more similar than he thinks - especially when it comes to our personal problems and insecurities. I will say, however, for the next two and a half hours, he was still playing video games and not studying.
TL;DR: my roommate almost strangled me and I recommended he see someone, to which he also did not take lightly (I honestly don't know how I could make this any shorter without leaving some details out)

Hello guys I need advice. I’m a transfer from CSN but I am missing 1 math class that’s required to apply to the business school as it was not available to take at CSN. I know I can get a waiver since it’s one class and I routinely make the deans list but who do I talk to about it? Literally no one related to the business school answers the phone nor the transfer counselors. Any advice?

Alright, so short story summary. Need depresso and wanted to KMS waiver (no hospitalization, only ideation no plan) LONGER SUMMARY AT BOTTOM. TYPED ON PHONE, APOLOGIES FOR LACK OF CONCISENESS.
Law student with MH history. I have realized I HATE LAW and want to start fresh. I always wanted to do medical stuff, but unfortunately. My family pushed me to law because of their own legal issues. I have thrived academically alwayso; I have put up with the bs of law school and excelled past my classmates out of sheer grit, but I'm fed up with having a lack of purpose.
I don't want to be a JAG and I want to enlist, not be an officer ($ doesn't matter, my ego isn't going to be hurt by being told what to do. I have more respect for people who didn't follow my career path than the entire legal industry).
I took antidepressants for 5-6 months (Lexapro) in (March - July) 2022 at age 22/23. Diagnosed with MDD-recurrent, unspecified anxiety nurse practitioner notes mentions SI-no plan (and I mentioned I've felt this way for years) - This diagnosis stems from family pressures and being forced to study for the LSAT for hours each day for an entire year. I literally tortured myself for a career I hate (I'm stupid)
I had a poor childhood and my parents forced their legal problems (my dad was accused of SAing someone, and parents thought it would be good to force me to learn about their issues fully - not fun).
The notes from Lexapro visit reference a depression screening I had when I was 19 or 20 where I screened positive for mild depression (checked yes to the, "Have you ever felt like you would be better off not alive). This screening was from around the time that my dad was finally being incarcerated after years of having to deal with his legal shit and their business problems.
I have a clearance that I stopped taking medication in July 2022, and 2 psych evals clearing me of current depression and anxiety.
It will be two years no meds this July.
I don't want to hear about 'military will make it worse' I have been through so many fuck fuck games for a career I never wanted. Attending little ROTC events and getting yelled at was the most enjoyment I've had in like 10 years. I'll be good. Just help me get IN as an enlisted. Stress has NEVER affected my ability to perform. Law school is hard enough when you want to be there, I killed it, hating every single moment I had to walk through those doors. Help me out 🙏
What are my chances of getting a waiver for Navy and/or Army or hell even Army National Guard. (I know AF has some medical stuff too, but I think my chances are shit with them because of BH)
Summary: 1 actual MDD depression diagnosis (2y 3mo), 1 depression screening for mild depression (3+ years), two instances of SI-no plan (newest 2y 3mo, oldest 3+ years). No inpatient, no attempt or SH. Almost 2 years of no medication in July. Solid work/career evidence even from period where I was depressed. 2 evals, one from a psych NP one from a psychologist. Statement from NP I stopped taking meds in July 2022. I am 25 and physically fit. I have one more year of school (unfortunately).