Free sony with a chance stuff on stardoll

Ableton: Everything Ableton! Live - Push & Max.

2009.12.09 16:51 supersaw Ableton: Everything Ableton! Live - Push & Max.

The unofficial subreddit of all things Ableton: Live, Push, Max, and Note.
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2014.06.14 00:39 'What are my chances?'

This sub is for anyone who wants feedback from others about their chances of acceptance at colleges and universities. When you ask for chances/advice, give as much information as possible - SAT/ACT, GPA, URM, extracurriculars, college essays, scholarships, and anything related to your college application.
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2013.01.31 05:39 Ashanmaril make fun of memes and stuff

specializes experts in the art of snafus
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2024.05.20 01:11 wthrihrdlyknwhr Former Partner wants a Rehire

Howdy!
I am a former partner, working as a barista back in 2020-2021 during part of my undergraduate education. As a grad student in a new state, trying to make ends meet, I’ve been half-heartedly applying to local stores for a few months now. I [F23] recently quit a small chain food service job for Numerous reasons— regardless, I’m really in need of a stable source of income.
I’m disabled, but have an incredibly strong work ethic. I often push myself to the point of exhaustion and even past it, but am learning to slow down a bit and listen to my body to avoid burnout. A majority of the 8 some-odd stores around me (a college town) are hiring, and for the past three weeks, I’ve been doing all that I can to ensure I don’t let another opportunity pass me up. Sure, other jobs exist, but I miss being a part of something bigger, classier, and in a company that genuinely cares for its employees.
Barista jobs began to pop up as students left town, but I’ve really been eyeing the handful of Shift Supervisor positions that opened. I admired, but was intimidated by, the role back when I was a 19 year old sapling. Now, with more years of work, life experiences in general, and a great deal of personal growth, I feel that I could really serve the company well. While a barista, I was told by my manager that I narrowly missed POQ two separate times. Trying to prove myself to my peers and to myself, that fact really disappointed me. I think, however, that in time, I’ll be able to surpass my past performance— and won’t be nearly as driven by such external validation. As long as the team is happy, I’ll be happy.
OKAY blah blah, get to the point, OP— I applied for Shift at my nearest store, went in and semi-jokingly asked how desperate they were for someone to fill the role, to which they responded, ‘pretty desperate.’ I’ve called a few times trying to catch the hiring manager, finally reaching them last Monday (13th). I was informed that I would receive a call back to schedule an interview by the next afternoon. I hadn’t heard anything by Wednesday, and stopped in to have a drink and decompress after a long semester. I did ask if the manager was by chance free, but alas, luck was not on my side. They did assure me, through the grapevine, that they would call me later that evening. It’s now Sunday, and I’ve heard nothing. All of this said: what should I do? Would it be rude to ask for a yes or a no? I am in need of a job to pay my bills, but I feel so inconsiderate being such a nuisance trying to show that I am available for an interview at any time convenient for the manager. I have not yet even received a denial email, in the case that you ask.
TL;DR— former barista (at 19) wants (now 23) shift position, manager said they’d call to schedule an interview by the 14th, it is now the 19th. what do?
submitted by wthrihrdlyknwhr to starbucksbaristas [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 01:09 No-Sheepherder-5992 good luck for eye exam spell

Ok so in 3 days I've got a language exam - 2 parts 2 days (B2 French) My level is good enough but the last time I took the exam I fell short by 8 points and definitely due to being a bit too stressed and flustered.
is the a nice spell I can do over the next few days to increase my chances of an easy going and relatively stress free exam experience and just add in a little bit of luck on the side and brain clarity overall?
(along with actually being prepared and I have been doing the exam prep work and studying etc haha :) )
submitted by No-Sheepherder-5992 to Spells [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 01:08 Stan_B Ai_Prompts_Batch_0001:\ part-E_ [ Resultset (\) ]

Would you have a concluding word to such world's setting?

Absolutely! Here are a few closing word options for your high-tech, low-life world, depending on the tone you want to achieve:
Hopeful:
In the flickering neon glow of the lower districts, a spark of rebellion ignites. Despite the hardships, the human spirit endures, seeking connection, hope, and a chance to build a better future.
Bittersweet:
The high towers of the elite cast long shadows over the bustling streets below. In this world of stark contrasts, the lines between survival and prosperity blur. But even in the darkest corners, love, ingenuity, and a flicker of defiance persist.
Grim:
The gears of progress grind on, leaving a trail of waste and despair. In this high-tech dystopia, the gap between the haves and have-nots grows ever wider. Will the lower districts rise up, or will they be forever locked in the underbelly of a world they can only glimpse from below?
Open-Ended:
Beneath the neon sky, stories unfold. Tales of hardship and hope, of rebellion and resilience. The future of this high-tech world hangs in the balance, waiting to be written by the choices of those who inhabit it.
Choose the closing word that best captures the essence of your story or setting. Remember, the world you've created is rich with possibilities, and the ending doesn't have to be definitive. It can leave your readers pondering the fate of its characters and the future of this complex and ever-evolving society.

If you should pick an item or an object that would clearly and cleverly symbolized such world, what would that be?

Here are two options for an item that symbolically represents the high-tech, low-life world:
  1. The Glimmering Shard:
  1. The Glitching Holographic Ring:
Both of these items are small, versatile, and can be interpreted in multiple ways, making them powerful symbols of the high-tech, low-life world. The choice ultimately depends on the specific tone and message you want to convey in your story.

Try something bit more distinct and specific.

How about the "Hacked Heart"?
Here's the breakdown:
This Hacked Heart offers a unique and distinct symbol of the high-tech, low-life world. It captures the struggle for authenticity, the desire for connection, and the pervasive influence of technology in every aspect of life.

How about straight up hacksawed hearth?

The "hacksawed hearth" is a very evocative image, but on its own, it might be a little too literal. Here are a few ways we can build on this concept to create a more symbolic and distinct object for your high-tech, low-life world:
  1. The Hacksawed Hearth Relic:
  1. The Hacksawed Hearth Stove:
  1. The Hacksawed Hearth Hologram:
These are just a few ideas to build upon the "hacksawed hearth" concept. Each option creates a distinct symbol for your world, capturing the struggle, resourcefulness, and yearning for connection within a high-tech, low-life society.

Apologies, i meant hacksawed heart.

Ah, a "hacksawed heart" takes the concept a whole new level! Here are some potential interpretations for this unique symbol in your high-tech, low-life world:
  1. The Literal Hacksawed Heart:
  1. The Hacksawed Heart Pendant (Metaphorical):
  1. The Hacksawed Heart Hologram:
These are just a few interpretations of the "hacksawed heart" symbol. Each one offers a unique perspective on the world, highlighting different aspects of the struggle between technology and humanity, vulnerability and resilience, and the fight for emotional connection in a harsh environment.

And how about hacksawed earth?

The "hacksawed earth" is a powerful and evocative image for your high-tech, low-life world. Here are a few interpretations that capture different aspects of this society:
  1. The Broken Globe:
  1. The Cracked Terrain Model:
  1. The Fractured Hologram:
These interpretations of the "hacksawed earth" symbol each offer a compelling way to visualize the societal and environmental consequences of the high-tech, low-life world. They highlight the impact on the environment, the fragility of the system, and the call for change.

What would be the very best thing in such world?

The "best thing" in a high-tech, low-life world depends on perspective and what holds the most value for different people. Here are a few contenders:
For the Struggling Masses:
For the Elite:
A Different Perspective:
Ultimately, the best thing in this world depends on your story and the characters' values. What are they fighting for? What would make their lives better? By exploring these questions, you can create a compelling world where the "best thing" is a powerful motivator for your characters and a reflection of the themes you want to explore.

What would be the best possible symbol for high-tech-based dominance?

Here are a few options for a symbol of high-tech dominance in your world, each capturing a different aspect of technological control:
  1. The Augmented Eye:
  1. The Neural Network Spire:
  1. The Glimmering Hand (Data Hand):
These symbols all offer a distinct way to represent the dominance of high-tech in your world. Consider the specific aspects of technology you want to highlight and the message you want to convey. These options provide a starting point to create a powerful symbol that embodies the oppressive yet awe-inspiring nature of technology in a high-tech, low-life society.

What would be the best set of symbols for resistance movements within such high-tech low-life settings?

In a high-tech, low-life world, symbols for a resistance movement need to be subtle, easily hidden, and adaptable to a world saturated with technology. Here are a few options that capture the spirit of rebellion in this unique setting:
  1. The Flickering Flame:
  1. The Glitching Gear:
  1. The Broken Wing:
  1. The Hacked Flower:
These symbols are just a starting point – get creative and consider the specific values and goals of your resistance movement. Remember, the best symbols are those that resonate with the characters and the audience, conveying the essence of rebellion in a way that is both meaningful and visually striking.
submitted by Stan_B to HTLL [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 01:03 Agent637483 My crush gave me her boyfriend’s number idk what to do

I had a crush on this girl for months I asked her out in October she rejected me but I’m February right before Valentine’s Day she asked me out I said I’ll think about it cause I got over her and I thought it was kind of suspicious that just randomly she asked me out there was signs before like she wanted to talk to me she would get nervous around me all the signs that she liked me I decided to give her a chance she gave me her number but when we we’re texting about the date she acted nothing like how she did normally and I got suspicious again and I tried testing her I gave my friend her number I was friends with him for years we treated each other like brothers so I trusted him he said she acted normal everything was good but I tested her again by pretending to catch her that stuff she acted super apologetic even when she didn’t know what she was talking about so I put that as a good sign but what happened after is my friend was still texting her he said that she sent a video of her in bed with a dude he didn’t give me the video but he sent screenshots of the texts and she was super apologetic again and that made me lash out
submitted by Agent637483 to dating_advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 01:03 odinsphere99 I Just finish the BEST D'Astey in the game!

If you have one better plz show prof with photo here.... if not......
I DECLARE MY D'ASTEY AS THE BEST IN THE GAME!!!!!
this was full f2p, the full star was when I started the game I have super lucky summoning for her and got all the dupes with the games free gems. I started in the drakan banner.
The gear set is the FREE EQUIP that you can farm with campaing currency.
I GOT SUPER LUCKY AGAIN XD, all the rolls went to speed or good stat... them Just have to change one stat to be perfect... again I did it with free resorces and took me a lot of time. But also got Lucky and most of my chances when super fast.... literally the first 2 went on first try lol.
I can still get 12% extra attack%... if I change the accesory evasión for attack%. Can get 6000 attack <.<
If you are a pro player, what would you change from this d'astey???
submitted by odinsphere99 to outerplane [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 01:01 AutoModerator Weekly Copyright Reminder

This is a weekly reminder post of this sub's stance on potential copyright infringement. This is a serious issue that needs to be kept in mind when creating and listing NFTs.
Original post by u/HurleyBird1
Quick disclaimer: I AM NOT A LAWYER. THIS IS NOT LEGAL ADVICE - THIS IS SIMPLY INFORMATION WITH WHICH TO EDUCATE YOURSELVES AND PREPARE YOURSELF FOR LEGAL ADVICE FROM A LICENSED SOURCE.
Now that that's out of the way. My credentials are: MBA, with a bit of business law classes under my belt.
I want to give a quick explanation of how copyright works - and I'll do so through quick blurbs n some myth/reality bullets.
Source: copyright.gov (US)
  1. Subject matter of copyright: In general28(a) Copyright protection subsists, in accordance with this title, in original works of authorship fixed in any tangible medium of expression, now known or later developed, from which they can be perceived, reproduced, or otherwise communicated, either directly or with the aid of a machine or device. Works of authorship include the following categories:(1) literary works;(2) musical works, including any accompanying words;(3) dramatic works, including any accompanying music;(4) pantomimes and choreographic works;(5) pictorial, graphic, and sculptural works;(6) motion pictures and other audiovisual works;(7) sound recordings; and(8) architectural works.(b) In no case does copyright protection for an original work of authorship extend to any idea, procedure, process, system, method of operation, concept, principle, or discovery, regardless of the form in which it is described, explained, illustrated, or embodied in such work.
- Myth: I can use any image/song/video/writing I want.
- Reality: No. Not true at all.
- Myth: Well they never said it's copyrighted.
- Reality: Upon publication (and even while a work in progress) a work is automatically protected via copyright under US Law.
- Myth: Well they never sold it.
- Reality: It doesn't have to be commercialized to be protected.
- Myth: Well it was a long time ago
- Reality: Possibly true...as long as the creator is deceased (or if multiple creators, the last living one is deceased) and the required time has passed...although this gets tricky with "estates."
(d) Duration of Rights.—(1) With respect to works of visual art created on or after the effective date set forth in section 610(a) of the Visual Artists Rights Act of 1990, the rights conferred by subsection (a) shall endure for a term consisting of the life of the author.
So what's this thing I hear called "Fair Use?"
Straight from the source:
  1. Limitations on exclusive rights: Fair use41Notwithstanding the provisions of sections 106 and 106A, the fair use of a copyrighted work, including such use by reproduction in copies or phonorecords or by any other means specified by that section, for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching (including multiple copies for classroom use), scholarship, or research, is not an infringement of copyright. In determining whether the use made of a work in any particular case is a fair use the factors to be considered shall include—(1) the purpose and character of the use, including whether such use is of a commercial nature or is for nonprofit educational purposes;(2) the nature of the copyrighted work;(3) the amount and substantiality of the portion used in relation to the copyrighted work as a whole; and(4) the effect of the use upon the potential market for or value of the copyrighted work.The fact that a work is unpublished shall not itself bar a finding of fair use if such finding is made upon consideration of all the above factors.
Uhh...help me translate that please... (here's a decent official translation: https://www.copyright.gov/fair-use/more-info.html)
  1. above...if it's non-profit educational use, you're usually good to go...if it's for money or trade (commercial nature) then you're usually NOT...unless YOUR piece is "transformative"
Transformative uses are those that add something new, with a further purpose or different character, and do not substitute for the original use of the work.
- Myth: Well this is paid for in Algos, not USD so it's not "commercial"
- Reality: IT IS commercial. You could even barter for bacon and it'd be commercial. It's an exchange of one good/service for another good/service.
- Myth: My piece with Batman inside a card is "transformative"
- Reality: No, unfortunately, more-than-likely the courts would say it's not. A good litmus test is..."If Warner Bros Entertainment (owner of Batman) wanted to make an NFT/ASA "Batman card" would yours compete with it or be possibly mistaken (by a reasonable person - so in America think 8th grade education) for real merchandise? Probably...thus it's not transformative enough.
"nature" gets a little tougher. This looks at protecting the "creative process." Thus, using other works of art is less-likely to be protected than using factual sources - like historical photographs since it's easier to "create art" and thus "transform" factual pieces than other art pieces. This is also talking to things like "parody." Satire is NOT protected. "Parody" is. What's the difference? LegalZoomputs it well: While a parody targets and mimics the original work to make a point, a satire uses the original work to criticize something else entirely. Another way to look at it is that satire uses another work as a way to comment on something happening in the world that has nothing to do with the original work.
- Myth: I added a different border, extra planets, and some blur effect to MTZ's World of Light - it's a new piece of art.
- Reality: Not likely the courts will see it that way.
- Myth: This guy added a filter, some burn effects, and collaged a bunch of newspaper headlines together - isn't that a violation!
- Reality: Probably not...the courts would probably see this as a creation of art out of factual sources.
amount/substantiality in relation to the whole...this is where using clips of songs that are only like 5 seconds long works! But using more than that...runs into problems. This is tough to decipher too...as some songs are EASILY identifiable from just 5 seconds (Ice, ice, baby) - and thus NOT fair use. But some aren't. Usually you're safe using a very small clip of a song or video - especially if you're adding more to it. But this is a dangerous game to play - and there's places to get free audio (some sources below)
effect of the use - this is probably the biggest one. Courts will look at simply...does YOUR work affect the sales or potential for sales of the copyright owner. Of note...this is looked at at the time of the issue being brought to the court, not at the time of sale. For example, let's say my batman card sells for 10 Algos today, but Algorand BLOWS UP and soon every NFT is on Algorand. And now my OG Batman NFT is seen as one of the first Batman ones and official. Warner Bros gonna sue the shit outta whoever owns it at the time they sue to get the rights to all sales of that NFT. So that person is left holding an empty bag when Warner Bros wins in court.
- Myth: Well they're not commercializing it NOW so I'm safe.
- Reality: Technically, yea Warner Bros probably won't spend the money to go after the OG artist and the hands the asset passed through...HOWEVER, they may. That's their right. Who knows - the Napster days showed us the lengths companies will go to. EVEN BIGGER HOWEVER, the last person holding it when Warner Bros DOES decide to go after that Batman NFT...uh oh for them - they just lost their asset.
- Myth: Well it's been like a year, and no one has brought up copyright. So I'm good.
- Reality: If this was in a normal market...maybe this argument would work. If McDonald's let you sell a Ronald McDonald poster for like a year on Amazon with no issues, some court may say "bro, you took too long to bring this to us." HOWEVER, with cryptocurrency being so new (and Algorand being so little known/discussed), most courts would see it as "reasonable" that a copyright owner failed to exercise their rights within a year - possibly even a decade. (Updated because I realized last example dealt with trademark not copyright :o)
So what am I safe to use?
US Government works (mostly)...any deemed free to use by creator...and any a copyright lawyer says they have your backs on (cuz now they're liable).
Here's some great sources for free use items (please add to this list below if you know of some!!!):
Pictures: https://buffer.com/library/free-images/ (Unsplash is one of my faves)
Music: https://www.wix.com/blog/photography/2019/11/27/free-music-for-videos/
Video: https://blog.hootsuite.com/free-stock-videos-sites/
You'll notice there's a lot of "shoulds" "coulds" "probably" etc. This is because copyright cases are all unique and go to the courts. The best bet is to go with stuff you KNOW is free and fair-use. If not, I'd look up copyright law, consult supreme court cases concerning copyright, and ultimately, talk to a lawyer.
AGAIN: I AM NOT A LAWYER. I AM NOT PROVIDING LEGAL ADVICE. I AM SIMPLY PROVIDING INFORMATION. THERE MAY BE ERRORS ABOVE THAT COULD CAUSE SUBSTANTIAL DAMAGES - CONSULT A COPYRIGHT ATTORNEY IF YOU WISH TO RECEIVE LEGAL ADVICE.
submitted by AutoModerator to AlgoNFTMarketplace [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 01:01 OddlyMid My (49M) brilliant but ASD/PTSD ex (47F) is now totally fine and happy and I think I’m traumatized

I apologize for the sheer wall of text but maybe this will be good cathartic Sunday reading? It helps a lot to write it out. I am a 49M widower, three years out of losing my wife (48F), father of three adult kids. Last year I felt I was ready to find love again, and joined a dating app. Very quickly I matched with Lexi (47F, not her real name) and was smitten right away.
I am in the tech and startup space in my city and she had just moved from the opposite coast with a tech background and two exits. In fact, she swiped on me because we had just connected by email two weeks earlier because she was looking to join the startup scene in her new home.
She was so accomplished and warm and smart. She was into Buddhism and spoke much of the language of my childhood in terms of peace and joy. We had so much in common. We quickly talked about cofounding a startup, I loved her own dreams for the future, she was supportive of mine. We were honest and vulnerable and despite feeling utterly naive and awkward it felt great.
It was also complicated. She had been married twice before, the most recent physically abusive and prompting her cross-country escape with her two sons. She was self-aware enough to know she was dealing with the trauma and I was wholeheartedly supportive. Practical things like helping her finish all the paperwork for her divorce or keeping a distance so as not to upset her kids made sense.
But over time and sometimes with great pain we would run into triggers and need to break and reset. Our attempts to do something together were too hard because she would fear losing control—which made sense. She was terrified of not having support in a new city and I made sure to be available to her as much as possible—down to reserving certain hours every day to be with her. She asked me to move into her building, then panicked because her sons might see me, so I moved into the building next door.
I loved her so much and wanted to do everything to keep her happy or at least feeling safe. Maybe my years as a caretaker to my late wife conditioned me in this way. But Lexi and I knew we both were in complex places in our lives and tried hard to navigate things. She read about dating a widower, I read about PTSD and ASD—something she felt explained a lot going back to childhood, from sensory sensitivity to difficulty reading nuance in social situations. As an awkward guy myself, I was empathetic.
We co-developed a shared document that basically helped us avoid landmines. When our daily time together would be. Where to park so she wouldn’t notice if I wasn’t home. Boundaries to protect her kids—which did feel like we were sneaking around and would fill her with guilt. She loved to cook and had specific dietary preferences and I adopted the same diet (and still stick to it, mostly, because it did improve my health). She said she felt safer the more of my face she could see, so I changed my glasses and shaved my facial hair. She was afraid of getting pregnant so I got my long-planned vasectomy.
And this all sound crazy, but I was happy to do it, and she seemed to be trying hard, too. She adopted ASD coping strategies, we put reminders around our respective homes, she even put my photo on her wall as part of a ranked list of priorities… though I think I came after her boys and her dogs. (I’m a cat person but loved her dogs, dogsat her dogs, and the regular walks were a main way we spent time together, even when things were rocky.) More articles and books, personality tests, studying results to find paths forward. She had a science background so did find some comfort in analyzing us.
The biggest trigger was that I would sometimes travel out of town. I work remotely so it wasn’t hard to just stay put. But before we met I’d planned to go to a big concert in LA with my daughter, and couldn’t not go. That one weekend trip was the biggest hurdle we faced. I even paid for therapy for her and kept my promise to keep in constant touch—but it caused a two-week break, and a lot of anguish thereafter. She felt abandoned even as I showed in every way that I was committed. A couple of times she had panic attacks and curled into a ball while we were out and about. Once she ran from me, genuinely afraid of me, when I had gotten frustrated and made a sarcastic remark.
Because of her past abuse, the physical side of our relationship was also tricky. There were rules here, too, but as a middle-age effective virgin, I was still into it. I’d only had one serious partner in my life, so everything was new and amazing… but for it to also be a hot-cold-voracious-guilt rollercoaster was… confusing. A few times I would be strong enough to say, “If this is too hard, we could just be friends.” But THAT was, as you might imagine, another huge threat to her sense of safety.
Until she concluded the same. We pledged—via email, because by then even text messages were too intense for her—to be good, single friends. Walks, hikes, movies. Love you always. Then no contact for four months. She mailed my keys back to me.
Of course, I still lived next door, and ran into her maybe four times during that span. She seemed stricken a couple of times, and would not speak, not really look up, and twice crossed the street to avoid me. Her dogs were happy to see me, which made it especially awkward. I tell you, I felt like the worst person on earth, a man who failed to be a good partner and caretaker when I thought that was a strength. I was worried that I made her PTSD worse, that she was a wreck…
Until three weeks ago, our anniversary. She said she was sorry for causing me pain and wanted to be friends. I could have fainted dead. We met up for lunch.
She was glowing. She was so happy. Her sons were now both adults and she decided they were going to be just fine, and feeling liberated. She wasn’t ASD, it was just PTSD. She had started a graduate program to become a therapist (something we discussed), happy to both be able to tap her experiences to help others and to have the chance to practice with herself and classmates. She turned her love of cooking into selling her stuff at a local market (something we discussed). gave up her diet because it made it hard to date. And she’d been dating. And had a boyfriend who was taking her out of town for a week. I immediately saw the brilliant woman I first met, and was frankly gutted. I was happy she was happy, I was crushed that she got where she is AFTER me, not WITH me.
My friends tell me she was genuinely troubled and that PTSD doesn’t just vanish in a few months. That she was wearing a mask with me, and that this new boyfriend—with whom she also has amazing commonalities—is getting the same “mimic” behavior. That, if anything, her wanting to reconnect means she’s looking to assuage guilt or regain a part of her still critical support system. That I turned myself inside out for her, and the most important question to ask myself is whether I should be as open to being friends as I am. They're afraid she might want to get back together eventually because I was so accommodating—and they might be right.
I made a lot of changes in my life for her, many positive, many that still persist. I feel like it would be a waste to go through what we did and NOT be friends. But I definitely went through the wringer and I feel like I’m now the one recovering from trauma. I believe in therapy and am going to work on this. But I’d value an objective take.
TDLR; First relationship as a widower was to an amazing but complex woman was very fraught and fell apart. After no contact for four months she asked to meet up, and she was glowing and normal and I’m shook. Was it bad timing and I missed my chance, or is she maybe not really okay? And can we still be friends?
submitted by OddlyMid to BreakUps [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:57 Upstairs_Report1990 Spent 1.5 hours shopping this order only to have..

Spent 1.5 hours shopping this order only to have..
The customer cancel it for “too many replacements”, even though I was in communication with them the entire time about it. And they approved my replacements! I showed them everything.
Now mind you, this was a triple batch so the other two customers were very understanding and reasonable, but how are you going to make me shop for you for almost 2 hours, in constant communication with you, approving all the replacements because you said it was OK , only until the very end when I’m about to check out, you cancel it on me.
Makes me wish I never told them I was about to check out and just went forward because they literally only canceled because there was no king Hawaiian hotdog buns.
Hell, that way I could’ve at least got a bunch of free stuff. Instead of wasting my time doing this entire order and I guarantee you it’s only 20 bucks now.
Why would anybody do that? Why would you communicate with me? Why would you tell me everything is cool and then at the last second right I’m about to go to check out, tell me it needs to be cancelled for “too many replacements”, I’m done this week, screw this.
submitted by Upstairs_Report1990 to InstacartShoppers [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:57 welcome2spooksville I (30m) can’t stand my (27m)’s father because he is verbally abusive and manipulative. How can I be supportive while distancing myself from his dad?

Right off the bat I’ll give you what I wrote down in my notes app about his father to keep tabs on everything.
“He insults him every chance he gets. Typical insults are “Can’t do anything right, you’re a fuck up, you’re useless etc.” constant mocking, threatening, shaming, deadnaming (we’re transgender)
Whistling/snapping or using an insult instead of our names.
Belittles any of our accomplishments.
Threatening to beat or kill him, me, or his dog (as a joke)
Said he was going to gut me and throw me in a trunk or that he should have strangled his mom instead of allowing my partner to be born Mocks you if you show any emotion from what he says
Angrily throws shit around in the kitchen WHILE saying loudly how stupid/shitty we are (could be over a dish left in the sink or our stuff in the fridge)”
After assessing his family dynamic, it seems they’re all used to this and defend him. They excuse their dad’s behavior and blame it on depression. So it wasn’t until we started dating and I pointed things out that he is now realizing it’s not okay for him to be abused.
I do not want to associate with this man at all. How do I explain this to my partner while still being supportive?
submitted by welcome2spooksville to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:56 Unknown_Assalant A trial of chrome (cyberpunk)

Hello everyone! I’m looking to do a cyberpunk roleplay! I have tried multiple times to write an interesting post with background, plot ideas, character info and such but it appears that this page has the pickiest auto-bot I’ve ever encountered and I don’t plan on making anymore posts just to waste my effort in making them interesting.
My name is Vi, I have been roleplaying for around six of those years. I enjoy using good grammar, decent reply lengths and good reply times, keeping a story interesting and captivating and that’s all I ask in return. I specialize in drama, romance, action and a little bit of horror hear and there.
I should mention that since English is my second language, I sometimes use a bit of French by accident. But it is rare and I try to keep it so.
I do hope you’ll give me the chance to show you the ecciting story line, plot and characters I’ve envisioned! If you’ve made it this far then feel free to DM me! See you there my freinds!
submitted by Unknown_Assalant to Roleplay [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:54 wthrihrdlyknwhr Former Partner wants a Rehire

Howdy!
I am a former partner, working as a barista back in 2020-2021 during part of my undergraduate education. As a grad student in a new state, trying to make ends meet, I’ve been half-heartedly applying to local stores for a few months now. I [F23] recently quit a small chain food service job for Numerous reasons— regardless, I’m really in need of a stable source of income.
I’m disabled, but have an incredibly strong work ethic. I often push myself to the point of exhaustion and even past it, but am learning to slow down a bit and listen to my body to avoid burnout. A majority of the 8 some-odd stores around me (a college town) are hiring, and for the past three weeks, I’ve been doing all that I can to ensure I don’t let another opportunity pass me up. Sure, other jobs exist, but I miss being a part of something bigger, classier, and in a company that genuinely cares for its employees.
Barista jobs began to pop up as students left town, but I’ve really been eyeing the handful of Shift Supervisor positions that opened. I admired, but was intimidated by, the role back when I was a 19 year old sapling. Now, with more years of work, life experiences in general, and a great deal of personal growth, I feel that I could really serve the company well. While a barista, I was told by my manager that I narrowly missed POQ two separate times. Trying to prove myself to my peers and to myself, that fact really disappointed me. I think, however, that in time, I’ll be able to surpass my past performance— and won’t be nearly as driven by such external validation. As long as the team is happy, I’ll be happy.
OKAY blah blah, get to the point, OP— I applied for Shift at my nearest store, went in and semi-jokingly asked how desperate they were for someone to fill the role, to which they responded, ‘pretty desperate.’ I’ve called a few times trying to catch the hiring manager, finally reaching them last Monday (13th). I was informed that I would receive a call back to schedule an interview by the next afternoon. I hadn’t heard anything by Wednesday, and stopped in to have a drink and decompress after a long semester. I did ask if the manager was by chance free, but alas, luck was not on my side. They did assure me, through the grapevine, that they would call me later that evening. It’s now Sunday, and I’ve heard nothing. All of this said: what should I do? Would it be rude to ask for a yes or a no? I am in need of a job to pay my bills, but I feel so inconsiderate being such a nuisance trying to show that I am available for an interview at any time convenient for the manager. I have not yet even received a denial email, in the case that you ask.
TL;DR— former barista (at 19) wants (now 23) shift position, manager said they’d call to schedule an interview by the 14th, it is now the 19th. what do?
submitted by wthrihrdlyknwhr to starbucks [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:51 SpamTherapy 26 [M4F] Hawaii/Online Seeking Friends

Helloooo!
Thanks for clicking this! I'm currently in search for someone online to keep up with and just see where it goes lol. Works been getting kind of repetitive lately, computers don't make for good conversation even with the AI getting better. My intentions with this post is to cast out a line for someone who's also looking to be weird with and just talk about our day, tell me about your dog, your dogs fleas, that one pothole in the road that for some reason is just impossible to avoid.
Little about me: i work in a IT/maintenance role, see where it can get repetitive? lol, but I try to have hobbies like gaming (I suck), running (I also suck), and occasionally vacuuming my room (sucks intentionally). I've been on a health kick trying to get in better shape, live a better life and tbh it would be nice to have someone else to bounce off of for accountability and companionship. My intentions aren't specifically relationship, just want a friend and someone to vibe with, I'm open to anything and wherever it goes it goes. I'm just interested in living, and eating good food and it'd be cool to have someone around for that.
More about me:
Favorite Color - Navy Blue
Favorite Song - Teenage Dream
Shows I'm watching: Fallout/Apothecary Diaries
Type of shows I like: horror, anime, nerdy stuff
Things I do in my free time: Night drives, Phone Calls, 3AM Tiktoking and Cooking/Baking.
Hope you read through this and found it interesting~ Shoot me a message if you're down to be friends!
submitted by SpamTherapy to r4r [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:49 throwawayugos69 Where do I go from here ?

I am trying to figure out how to structure my prep moving forward / where I stand.
I have been reviewing math concepts with Greg’s fundamental series for a few months inclusive of the practice videos (I used to be pretty good at this stuff in high school but kind of forgot , liberal arts major), and intermittently did some magoosh vocab app .
I just took the second free practice test on the ETS site, and got 160 verbal , and 153 quant. I kind of ran out of time on the second section of quant because I was being dumb on a simple problem. Few questions :
A) how realistic is the second free practice test with respect to the real gre and its scoring ?
B) I need a ~165 , though aiming for a high 160s on both sections for my goals. What is the best way to structure my prep? Is such improvement even possible?
C) as far as verbal goes, I got every question right in the first section , but seem to have missed a few reading comprehension and vocab in the second section. Verbal sounds like it’s pretty hard to improve, what’s the best way to do it ? Should I basically crank through a lot of the vocab from the various sources ?
D) should I pay for tutoring at this point , and if so, what’s the best source?
Thank you !!!
submitted by throwawayugos69 to GRE [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:47 startupschool4coders Imagine how having a coding job would improve the lives of your family

Imagine yourself, coding in an office, for an employer, discussing code with your coworkers, getting a hefty paycheck every two weeks. You are happier and that makes everybody in your family happier.
Imagine what accomplishing that would mean, not only for you, but for your family. Moving to a better place to live. Eating better food. Having less financial stress. Enjoying your time at work. Enjoying your time off more.
It would give you all a better life.
Wouldn't you do nearly anything to make that happen? Even attend a free 2-hour webinar?
The FREE Resume+ webinar might make this happen for you ... or it might not.
But, if you don't attend, I'm certain that whatever other activity that you spend those 2 hours will leave you no closer to a coding job or any improvement to the lives of your family that would come with it.
If you attend, you can still do that other activity the next day. But you will have missed your chance for the FREE Resume+ webinar and will have to wait until December.
For the sake of your family, I hope that you make the right choice.
If something is holding you back, overcome it for the sake of your family.
The countdown is on: 2 days until the webinar.
* * * * *
If you want to want to do this, DM me to get the sign up link for my free Resume+ email list so you can attend my free Resume+ webinar on Tuesday.
submitted by startupschool4coders to startupschool4coders [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:45 AutoModerator Weekly Q&A Megathread. Please post any questions about visiting, tourism, living, working, budgeting, housing here!

Hello, welcome to London!

Visiting us? Moving to study or work? Brief layover? Moving to a new part of London? Any small questions about life here, if you're new or been here your whole life, this is the place!
We get a lot of posts asking very similar questions so this post aims to address some of our most Frequently Asked Questions, and give you a place to ask for assistance.
Your first port of call should be

the london wiki

It includes sections on:
What should I see and where are the non-touristy stuff and hidden gems? We've written about the big must-sees here and we highly recommend TfL's Experiences site. We've listed some of our favourite lesser-known stuff here And the cheap/free stuff here
How do I pay for the Tube/bus, and what's an Oyster card? You don't pay cash. You can use a number of contactless payments systems such as your Contactless bankcard (which is widespread in the UK, but maybe not so much elsewhere), Apple Pay, Android Pay, or you can buy an Oyster card and top it up with credit. See here for more.
Where should I live? What's x area like? Have a look here It includes recommended sites to find places to live and rent, and has a section on what particular areas are like.
How do I get from this place to that place? Use Citymapper. Honestly, we're not shills for them; it's just a really good app and is used by most of the locals on this sub.
Is x area safe? Yes. Bad stuff can happen in any large city, but London is generally very safe. There aren't any no-go zones. Even under the shadow of terrorist attacks, most Londoners feel safe. See our safety page here for more.
Where can I watch the baseball/basketball/football/handegg match? A comprehensive guide to all London football matches in all leagues can be found at tlfg.uk. Use Fanzo to find pubs showing a variety of sports and see our list of other places here
How do I get a UK SIM card for my phone? Advice on networks and how to get a SIM card is covered here. It also includes suggestions of cafés and other places where you can get free wifi and do a bit of work.
Is the London Pass worth it? Probably not
Other subs that you may find helpful:
  • /LondonSocialClub - Meeting new people for events, activities and/or pints.
  • /IWantOut & /UKvisa - Check if you need a visa and how to get one if you want to work here.
  • /LegalAdviceUK - Good for all sorts, especially for questions about landlords and contracts.
  • /UKPersonalFinance - Another goldmine of sage advice.
  • /AskUK - Great for general questions about UK life that aren't specific to London.
Tips for posting:
Tell us about you - If you want us to suggest things for you to do then you need to give us a good idea of what you enjoy. Don't just say "I like music", say what type of music. Don't just say you want "somewhere nice to eat", say what type of cuisine you like (or don't like). The more specific you are the better, otherwise you'll just get pointed back to the generic guidebooks, blogs and our wiki.
Tell us your budget - If you're on a budget then tell us what it is and we can bear that in mind when making recommendations. There's no point in us coming up with ideas for things to do and places to eat if they'll clean out your wallet within the first 5 minutes. Saying you want something "cheap" isn't really helpful because what's cheap is entirely subjective.
Tell us where you'll be based - Let us know where you'll be staying so that we can give local recommendations.
Asking about hotels or hostels - We have homes here so know very little about what the hotels are like. Look on review websites such as TripAdvisor. However, if you say "I've been looking at these three hotels. Which do you think is the better location?" then that's the sort of thing we can answer.
Non-touristy stuff - There are no secret corners where we hide the good stuff from outsiders! This is one of the most written about cities in the world, so when we want to go to a museum, or gallery, go window shopping, or whatever, we look at the same sources as tourists (listings sites, blogs, etc - see front page of the wiki).
These weekly posts are scheduled to post each Monday at 00:01. If it's late in the week you may want to wait for a new post to appear. Please send us [ModMail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Flondon with any suggested improvements!)
submitted by AutoModerator to london [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:43 Maximum_Principle978 Did I messed up my life at 20?

As the title says, I 20M made many decisions that I believe messed up my youth experience and will probably have consequences in my future. If you don’t want to read all of this just read the last question paragraphs.
So basically, I lost a year in High School due to bad grades at 17, as I had to work another 2 jobs to help my family, which went trough an extremely hard financial situation. I lost almost all my friends that year and became extremely depressed, and bitter. I gained lot of weight and my hygiene was on all time low.
At 18 I became extremely antisocial and literally only went to like 3 parties, where I didn’t do anything. I became over stressed over my future, my career, and started thinking that I’m a failure. I legit couldn’t even focus on girls, or anything like that because of how much I was thinking to try to figure my life out. Even though I started going in the gym, and put (physically) my shit together, I was still mentally depressed and even though girls and people were approaching me, I still acted like an autistic person, and messed up my last year at high school. I only focused on getting my grades up.
By 19, where I had to pick a college to go on, again, I messed up real bad in the access exams due to working the last months. My grades were so bad I had to go to a famous online school in my country, which is known for being the “failure students” uni. I spent 2 years studying hard to get a good grade and pick a good college, and still failed tremendously, meanwhile other people who didn’t focus and just partied and lived their lives, went to the one I wanted to.
So, I decided to start my degree online, and miss the first year college experience. This killed me inside but well, life goes on. Basically I spent that year working on multiple places, training, and being miserable. Meanwhile my classmates were enjoying the shit out of their lives, I was working in some low class jobs (I saved a lot of money but it doesn’t compensate), studying at the worst uni possible, and being stressed 24/7.
As if this wasn’t enough, this year I missed the matriculation of the access exam. I was misinformed via phone call and now it’s too late for me to do the access exam. I spent a whole year studying for nothing. I genuinely feel like my life is over, like 100%. Never, ever, in my life I had this sense of extreme emptiness and overwhelmed. I can not longer train properly, sleep, work, study, do self improvement habits without the thought that I completely f up my youth, even though I was working hard and doing my best, It’s absolutely incredible how hopeless I am now. It really is over. All my plans are terminated, all the work and endless hours that I’ve gone through just working were useless.
So basically my main concern is that I’d have to wait till I’m 21 to actually be on a decent college (3rd year), till then I have to study online and ruin completely my college experience. I genuinely don’t want to work as garbage man/toilet cleanesecurity/airport auxilia… kind of jobs that I went through, but I’m forced. Everybody knows I worked as these and make fun of me. I don’t have anything going on in life. I do feel like my social circle is also a big contributing factor, as almost all my close friends are in the same position as me. I do not want to end up like my family, working all their lives in low class jobs, but I am really going that path if I keep being this way. The career path that I chose (Computer Science) is really making me rethink whether this is for me or not. I am not enjoying coding, or at least the way they teach it. I only enjoy it when I code my own things, but working 8 hours a day in front of a screen…
I would like to ask some questions to people who may think can contribute something:
-Do you think I am missing a lot of the college experience? Like meeting a lot of new friends, girls, parties and all that stuff? I don’t know what is it like. I’m concerned if I’m just over stressing. I want to get to know people, girls, but I’m just not able to.
-Is it weird to be in college at 21 without knowing anybody there? What if I start a new degree? Will I be the uncle of the class?
-Will I do right if I get rid of my friends? They’re all very low level people, with black future, but they’re the only reason I have minimum social skills.
-Am I doing right focusing way too hard on self improvement? I’ve been watching hundreds and hundreds of hours of podcasts to gain knowledge and proper mentality, but I’m scared I will learn the same things if I just lived properly and do what everybody my age does. Maybe maturity can’t be learned.
-How do I not waste the year? I’ll have a lot of free time in some months, I genuinely don’t know what to do. All I have in my sad life is a 100k youtube channel that grew a lot in the last months that really doesn’t compensate all my lost experiences in life. My family isn’t being harsh at me due to “losing” the year, but I always had high expectations over myself and now I’m in the literally worst position possible.
-Am I doing wrong thinking I will make money on my own? Am I just being the classic 20yo kid who thinks he will become a millionaire?
Just FYI, I’m 6’6” and fairly attractive, so you don’t think I’m a random incel. Just a normal dude with really bad luck in life.
submitted by Maximum_Principle978 to Advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:40 Maleficent-Pair-808 what's the deal with catdets?

Obviously there's always a ton of questions regarding how to become a catdet, what it means to be one, and so on...
Well, here's the chance for the Jupiter Community and also whoever is keen to be part of the Jupiter community to join in and co-construct this notion of Catdets together. Get in at ground-zero...
*
Last week we hosted our first Catdet Townhall in the Discord, right after the weekly Jupiter Ecosystem call.
It was a great turn out and huge love and thanks to all those who joined us for the discussion. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
The community chatted about the sort of rules, guidelines and ethos that Catdets should abide by, and the ideas were co-contributed into the a public collaborative sticky notes tool (Padlet)
https://padlet.com/ccusic/catdet-brainstorm-board-16v90dxm2fzmg45v This is a live, public document. Feel free to add your thoughts and ideas to it!
This effort is really really important for the Catdet Work Group because it is the first step in the process of listening closely and working with the community to co-create. Together we will craft a concept and vision of what being a Catdet mean. A strong Catdet core and culture will serve to accelerate Jupiter’s mission to bring the decentralisation meta to the world.
We will continue this iterative process next week, on Tuesday 9am EST with a public co-working session in the Jupiter Discord, where we will go over the ideas in the Padlet and distil them into the first draft working document.
Look forward to seeing the community join us in this! LFGrow!!!!!
Here’s the link to the Discord event: Discord and Twitter post: https://x.com/JUPCatdets/status/1792321926096187404
submitted by Maleficent-Pair-808 to jupiterexchange [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:39 Kitsuchuuu Friendly Community Looking For Members

Hey y'all! I'm Eri (28F) me and couple of friends, we just formed a pretty tightly knit community of friends, gamers, DnD enjoyers and people to hangout with. We are running a Discord server that allows for meetups, gaming sessions and so on. If you're a cool person that's into meeting new people and you happen to like gaming, nerd stuff or anything interesting and are interested to join feel free to leave a comment below this post or send me a DM !
submitted by Kitsuchuuu to Groningen [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:37 beckybitchh My ex (21M) dumped me (22F) but still says he loves me. Can I get him back?

So my ex and I were together for 2 years and everything was great. From the beginning we were almost everyday together and last year we even sort of lived together in his student room. He is a lovely boy who is always positive, brings a light into the room and made me feel the luckiest girl in the world. I had some bad relationships in the past and he was finally the one who loved me and cared for me in a way I would never imagine.
We both were students when we met and lived the typical student life: partying, drinking, going on vacation, etc. I graduated last June and had a job by the end of September. In the summer vacation we both went on a road trip together for 2 weeks and it was amazing. From the moment I started working, the relationship was not so exciting anymore: I came home, cooked dinner, ate together, we watch tv together or he is gaming with the boys and I’m doing my thing and then we went to sleep. My routine after work was boring if I look back at it, but it was new for me too. In the meantime we did some fun things, but not so often like we used to. I was into the adult life and even considered by moving in together and that kinda stuff.
Everything was fine and even the living together stuff was all fine by him too. We never argued (maybe 2-3 times in 2 years) and he always said “yes” or “fine by me” on everything, even if I asked his opinion 10x. So I thought we were still good. Until a couple weeks ago I came home from work and I noticed there was something wrong. I asked him a couple times and finally he said, out of the blue, that he had doubts about our relationship. I freaked out and cried so we couldn’t talk properly. He went home to his parents and the next day he came back to talk. He said he still wanted to be with me but some things had to change, for example my temper (I have a high temper and can get mad for the smallest and dumbest reasons and lately it did occur often that I got mad really fast). I said that I will work on it because it was true, it gotten worse and it wasn’t pleasant for the both of us, but he had to work on his communication as well. His doubts came for me out of nowhere because he never communicated with me about things that bothered him.
Our relationship went forward and I worked on myself and so did he. I thought it went good until 2 weeks laters the same conversation came up. He said he still have doubts about the relationship. I asked him why and what he wanted to do about it to fix it but everytime I got the answer “I don’t know”. So I suggested that we move on like we did but saw eachother less (like leave 2-3 days in between). So, then we did that because he agreed with the options I gave him to try and work things out.
Again everything went well. Couple weeks ago he was in his student room and I was at home by my parents. I noticed he wasn’t online on any social media and haven’t send me a message in 2 hours or so. Because of my past I panicked and spammed him with messages and phone calls asking what he is doing and where he is. I did this a couple of times and he got mad for my behaviour. After that, I came back to reality and realised that my behaviour is not healthy and apologised. He eventually calmed down too and said it’s okay and I love you. Later that week, we met up and he said “I think we shouldn’t see eachother for a time” and I broke down. The next day he deleted all my pictures on Instagram and removed me from the family groupchat so I was confused because this seems like a breakup instead of a break/pause. He came over and would only say “I made the decision so I stand by it”. So it was done.
Couple days later I went to his student room, where we ‘lived together’ to get my stuff. I made him a long letter which I read for him to say thankyou. After that he comforted me and we cuddled really long. We constantly kept eye contact and he admitted that he still loves me, felt butterflies in his stomach, felt happy, etc. I felt that he really had a hard time of keeping his hands of me and letting me go. At the end, we gave eachother a big goodbye kiss and it was magical. Despite all that, he still says he couldn’t be with me. He also said “maybe in the future” and “not right know” and that kinda stuff. I suggested that we go no contact for 2-3 weeks and then meet up again to see if his feelings have changed.
It’s been 2 weeks and he asked to meet up this tuesday. I want to feel hopeful, but in the meantime he deleted me on Snapchat last tuesday and unfollowed me on Instagram the same evening he asked me to meet up, which was last friday.
I have the feeling he is running away from his true feelings and is scared to get back because he thinks things will get better for 2 weeks and then the same conversation will end up. I am convinced we needed this because now I can truly see what behaviour from me is wrong and I need to get help to fix that for me. I already took the step to go to a psychologist. But he is stubborn and is convinced that it won’t work anymore.
I don’t know what else to do or say to him to get him back. I really love him and he is the man I see a future with. He does get the best out of me and supports me in things to make myself happy. I really think that if we gave this another chance it can work and we can get better out of this if we both work on our communication. How can I convince him that it can work between us and he doesn’t have to run away from his feelings? What do I do or say to him this tuesday? Is there a chance for us? I want my sweet boy back…
submitted by beckybitchh to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:37 wildpastachild New here and sharing my experience of being parentified

First off, feel free to comment about your own experiences. I would love it if anybody can relate. I'm also open to questions, advice, whatever you wanna write. This is gonna be a bit longer, just fyi. Excuse lack of proper chronological order and maybe some wonky sentences, English isn't my first language.
I was parentified.
For context, my mother has three children, I'm the youngest one, then there's my older half-brother (30) and my older half-sister (36). Their father was a violent alcoholic with schizophrenic tendencies (official diagnosis), luckily I never met him. I refer to them as brother and sister. I'm 21 now. I'm the only child of my mom and my dad, my dad has three other kids who are in the same age group as my maternal siblings. Lots of history with divorces and family fights, I'm the center of a complete patchwork family, everybody moved towns a lot, it's all a bit messy and disorganized.
My mother has severe borderline disorder and has massive trauma from several age stages, especially involving men. She was heavily parentified and yet socially cast out by her family herself. I don't remember a time where I didn't act like her father, emotionally. This is made worse by the fact that I'm trans so I was like her bestie before I began socially transitioning in my early teen years. Of course, this was a massive issue for her. She told me she had only ever wanted daughters. Materially she was taking care of things until I was about 11 - walked me to school and took care of the household, used to work, everything.
I remember sitting next to her during a talk/fight she had with my dad while she was sobbing, I can't have been older than 3 or 4. They got divorced around that time. As I grew older, I came to be my mom's sole emotional support person. We had moved to an isolated village with my step-father and she developed a severe agoraphobia for some time. My step-father avoided all emotionality with both her and me and therefore I was now her only friend. I overheard conversations that she shouldn't be having with her child next door and was told about her most severe fears and traumas from a young age. I was lashed out at on a near daily basis and punishment came unexpectedly. It would consist of being screamed at for minutes on end until I would cry and hyperventilate, but she wouldn't stop then.
In spite of her idea of punishment and raising children, she was incredibly attached to me, still is. This would include massive anxiety fits when she didn't know where I was or when I was getting into activities she didn't approve of. One time, when I was about 17, I went to a party in my friend's basement. She knew about this and approved it, knew my friends and where they lived. I didn't have any signal in that basenent so she couldn't reach me. She proceeded to look up my other friends' parents' phone number and call them to contact me. There was nothing she wanted except to know that I had arrived there.
Whereas my other siblings had long left the household years apart from eachother, both with specific and complex fights and banging doors and screaming fits, I was, as the youngest child, turned into a confessional and a therapist. I would mediate fights from a young age. I witnessed physical violence between my brother, my mother and my sister. My brother was the perpetrator for the most part (however, I was neither hurt nor threatened myself). Nobody proceeded to remove me from the situation or stop me from getting involved. From then on, every fight and every drama caused me intense bouts of anxiety and it, to this day, remains to be the only thing that makes me cry and/or lash out.
In a household full of anger, my anger was not tolerated. I was raised with some old-timey sort of black paedagogy (edit: by this i mean some nazi-era remnants type of paedagogy) (I'm German so it is something of a generational curse for some): I was to have unwavering respect for my parents, I was expected to be obedient, "let him cry it out" type stuff. At least when I was a younger child. When I got older, my emotions did not matter either. After stressful situations or fights that I proceeded to witness for most of my life, nobody ever asked me how I felt or explained to me what had actually gone down. I was left alone while not being left alone at all.
If I failed to provide emotional security for my mother or even attempted to call her out, I was made to feel immensely guilty. This could range from her crying/yelling things like "Why is it always me that must suffer" to guilt-tripping texts and blocking my contact for a while to very action-based suicide threats, depending on the situation. Her emotions were forced to be my emotions if I wanted to "stay alive".
At the same time, I still proceeded to excel in school. I felt like dying but nobody, and I tell you, nobody, noticed. I was a teacher's pet, I still had some loose friendships, I visited my dad once a month or more ever since my parents divorced. Nobody realized what I felt. I felt alone and had the worst depressive episode of my life when I was 13. I neglected personal hygiene. I never opened up to my father for many years. To this day I think he doesn't know everything. Especially during covid, him and my ex-stepmother were my safe space. When I first opened up to them, they welcomed me with open arms, my father was very strict and cold when I was young, but he softened, changed, and is everything and more I could ask for in a father. He is among the most positive examples of masculinity and especially of fatherhood that I know in my circles. He sends me postcards several times a month, wants me to visit, hugs me and tells me he loves me and that he's proud, gives me space. The dad who remembers the names of our childhood stuffed animals. Literally. I love him to death. He was also the only parent who engaged in activities with me and would play with me, later on take me to the movies, go to bars and restaurants, go to museums with me etc.
My mother got worse both psychologically and physically, she is chronically ill and needs immense support in a lot of things now. For about a year, my stepfather worked in a town far away and only came home during the weekends. This was during covid. Within a year, I developed a hatred so deep for my mother that I had thoughts that scared me. I took care of our pets and the household, was not allowed to get into any activities after school other than coming home and spent hours after my day listening to her rants, anxieties, fears. I get hateful goosebumps when I remember the way she used to call my name when she wanted me to do something for her. Sometimes she would make me stay awake for longer, knowing that I had to get up at 6am again. It was usually already around 12 at night. She wanted me to walk the dog before SHE went to bed because otherwise it would ruin her otherwise horribly insomniac circadian rhythm. Therefore I was not allowed to go to sleep. At that point she had not worked for more than 6 years and stayed home all the time. My stepfather and I did grocery shopping. She rarely ever leaves the house if she can avoid it. This was during the German version of my GCSE's.
I was denied medical care that could have potentially fixed my posture issues and other orthopedic issues. My mother deemed physiotherapy as inefficient and got mad when I asked her about it again. Money was always an issue. We were evicted once. I was denied certain things and never asked for extra cash because we ran low on money, my stepfather was blamed for smoking and consuming a lot of meat (which indeed is pricy), but my mother never reflected on her online shopping addiction and I'm aware that she is in an ongoing debt. Has been for years now.
Things got a bit better when my stepfather moved back and Covid cleared up somewhat. Regardless, I used pure spite to continue studying hard while they were yelling at eachother from the top of their lungs for hours on end and did the best I could to get the hell out of there. I've had therapy with several years' of breaks for a total of nearly 3 years now, that I partially applied for myself and I'm working on tackling everything. I live in a different city, studying subjects that I love. I get all my shit done, for the most part, I know how to do paperwork and know how all of the chores work. I can regulate myself in terms of sleep and food and cheap thrills. I have a (milder) case of anxiety. I keep meaningful friendships in which I find myself capable of avoiding all the harmful behaviors and attitudes I was taught. I'm learning to stand my ground and take responsibility for my own decisions and actions.
When I establish my boundaries with her now, she turns into some sort of anxious-attached mess. She over-apologizes to me. She puts me on a pedestal and I'm living a life that she is jealous of. She is intensely attached to me and considers me her favorite child and also hasn't properly gotten over my father, over 15 years of them being divorced. She will do anything to support me materially and then tear me down emotionally. Everything I tell her is followed by her mourning the life she doesn't have and never had instead of properly celebrating with me. She gets noticeably sad when I refuse to give her my full attention, she yearns for what she considered a deep and important relationship to me. But it was all just emotional neglect and emotional abuse. Now I sometimes can't help but meet her with the same attitude she gave me.
This is not perfectly chronological and all over the place. I have complicated relationships with my siblings and other relatives, which I don't mourn, but feel guilty about. My father and I are very good with eachother although I need to confront him about some things as well. With my mother I do the bare minimum to avoid conflict, yet without throwing my sense of self out of the window again. She is the only human who can easily cause anxiety attacks in me, no matter where or when. I sometimes wish I was not in contact with her. I have a tendency for smoking too much weed and being just a bit too careless with other drugs (although I rarely do those in comparison), but I also try and regulate this heavily (e.g. not finding a dealer but asking friends every once in a while etcetc). I think this stems from these experiences. Apart from that, I think I'm coping very well.
To everybody: it does get better. It does. Even when your emotions are a rollercoaster sometimes. You will be in a different place, maybe you already are, and you'll escape from these structures. I think the hardest pill for me to swallow is that I create my own reality and that nobody will give me my stolen childhood back. I am an (albeit young) adult now and I must do everything I can to avoid becoming like her. Her life is not a life I want to lead. There's hope and you won't always be in this place.
submitted by wildpastachild to emotionalneglect [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:36 Spare-Event8667 36 [FM4F] #Orlando #FL - Seeking Adventurous Female to join a Threesome (Casual / FWB)

36(F) Latino seeking an adventurous lady out there willing to help me achieve our first threesome with my 40(m) Latino husband as a treat for us.
We have done a lot of work together during our time together and always wanted to explore this option and pretty secure with the idea.
We are a bit inexperienced being that it would be our first time with a third. We are open to another first timer wanting to explore also or someone more experienced. So any curious lady’s here your chance to knock an item off your bucket list.
I would love to spend some time vibing with you leading up as we plan together and am also open to your input. It just as much for your pleasure as it will be ours and want you to be comfortable too. It could even grow into a regular thing.
What I am looking for. - Female age 21-36 - No couples or single males (will ignore) - Drug free and clean. 420 OK - Local / Willing to travel to Orlando area (no tourist) - Able to verify on a video call if we vibe.
Send me a DM to chat more with your deets and your experience level so we can begin to explore together.
submitted by Spare-Event8667 to R4R30Plus [link] [comments]


2024.05.20 00:36 PhantomFool 32 Fear Crit build - Aspect of [REDACTED]

TLDR: Thanatos Axe. Lighting lance + Poseidon Cast. Get Mana regen. Replenish DD. Dash out of omega Charge attack. Go crazy
If spamming 25% chance 1000 crit Omega casts sounds fun try this out. Thanatos Axe. Kinda sucked that I had to go with a ranged cast build even on a melee aspect to beat it. It was still really fun though.
Main boons: Poseidon Cast Lighting Lance
Main Arcana The Moon Death (actually forgot to add this in my run) The sorceress - crucial for positioning
Pick any other arcana of preference with some rerolls to be able to fish for boons.
Vows I avoid rebuke because the build depends on your crit burst. The quicker enemies are gone the less risk you have of taking damage. I also avoid vow of panic because i need to be able to use my omega attack early on. I dont have the patience to use my regular attack only. This aspect is not mana hungry with the Unseen arcana until you start using your Poseidon Omega cast. With 0 heal i had to depend on getting DD replenished. Saving your gold for this is not a bad idea. If Echo doesnt offer DD, take Dodge. At that stage you hopefully already have the Lance + Poseidon Cast and some mana regen. You might be able to carry some of that dodge to the final fight if you fight carefully enough (its more possible than you might think if you have full build)
Hammers Avoid advanced whirlwind - You cant dash out of this Omega attack and makes using it feel to risky. Avoid Hell splitter - makes charging up your Omega Attack a lot more inconvenient and risky. Other omega attack hammers are pretty good.
Hex Several Hex upgrades can boost cast damage. However, id prioritize the two main boons and DD replenishment over getting Selene early. Once you do have full build you will be getting your Hex very frequently.
Chaos Ill take Chaos even if it means dying. The potential cast damage, omega damage, or mana regen (priority 1) are too good to give up. Benefit is just too great.
Extra Tips: -You can dash while charging your omega attack and it will trigger at the end of your dash. Just make sure to dash before your release your attack button. This means you can charge from a safe position and dash in with a full charge when its safe. -Your crit chance build up carries over between location. -Before you can rely on your cast damage you will need to use your regular cast + omega Attack to zone out and burst enemies. You can use your attack boon of preference but I used poseidons because I used his keepsake on Erebus so I can get the omega cast. Demeters attack is also really good with axe and it will make regions 1-3 a breeze (no pun intended) -I switched to Zeus keepsake on region 2 to get lance. Make sure to have mana regen in some form by the final region. Mana use reduction is also really good, anything that helps you spam omega cast.
Theres a few other ways to boost cast damage but i dont remember them all right now. My favorite is Dads DD damage boost if i have replenished enough DD. I was hitting Chronos for nearly 2k per Omega cast from the bonus 70% cast damage while being on my last DD. Those crits went crazy. ALSO, feel free to unbind your Special for fun.
submitted by PhantomFool to HadesTheGame [link] [comments]


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