Hello, I am a developer. While thinking about designs I thought « hey, too bad I can’t just model a 3D animation and export it as a Lottie file. This could make 3D rotation, lighting, effects straightforward. ». But I am really not a professional graphic designer, so maybe that is total non-sense.
I have thought about how I would develop such a tool, and I am wondering if this is something that could interest others or if this is a waste of time.
This would be a 3D scene to 2D vector renderer, capable of outputting SVG or Lottie format.
Curious to ear about your thoughts.

INTRODUCTION

California_Politics is a political discussion sub for the news and discussion about politics in the Golden State, with more politics than /California, and more California than /Politics. The Community Standards are still as always.

PURPOSE OF GENERAL CHAT

Normally this subreddit is setup to address the political and social issues that divide our state and dominate our social media feeds. The purpose of this very different thread is to trial a space for community members to talk about more than just our state politics.
We hope that we can help encourage community participants to find a way past the ideological differences that frequently appear in the comments and share more about the California they experience every week. For many participants, the issues that occur every week are personal, and a general chat is a space for folks to acknowledge how their lived experiences shape their points of view.
In this thread you can talk about any variety of politics, Ukraine, subreddit polls, surveys and predictions, your vacation, your pets, your latest hiking adventure, or tell us about your day, or almost anything under the overcast skies. Just have fun, be kind, remember the human and model the kind of civil, productive discussion we are hoping to have here on a regular basis.

CaliforniaPolicy

Political policy, not partisanship, should be the backbone of our states politics. With that in mind, a college student created CaliforniaPolicy last year and I was happy to help moderate their subreddit. It appears however that their school project has ended. We will continue to crosspost content we feel would be of interest to this community.

Context Added

A new report reason was added for submissions. Community members can now report submissions they feel need the "Context Added" flag added to content. In addition users can submit their own context via the existing "Message the Moderators" tool. While a report will not guarantee that context will be added to the submission it does provide for better tracking and trending of reports. With better data we can determine appropriate steps to help the community safeguard itself.

But how will it work? When moderators add a context flair to a submission, there should be a sticky comment containing background info, sourced from independent third-party sources, to give more context on the topic. Moderators will not be endorsing any of the info shown in sticky comment, but simply relay third party information to add context and promote discussion.

Auto Moderator & Account / Karma Filtering

The team still strongly feels that hand crafted moderation is the ideal to shoot for, as we want a hands on approach to creating an inclusive environment where people can discuss California's political ideas. That said, we will continue focusing on using auto moderator to filter our slurs, bigoted slang, and pejorative-name calling. In addition, we'll be using it to filter out content from new accounts within 45 days and accounts with less than 100 karma.

POLITICAL DISCOURSE

Just a reminder that we should all advocate for truthfulness, accuracy, honesty, and reason as essential to the integrity of communication. Participants in this subreddit should be willing to endorse freedom of expression, diversity of perspective, and tolerance of dissent to achieve the informed and responsible decision making fundamental to a civil society.
Thank you again everyone.

I am happy for everyone here who continues to find and receive some amazing figs, but I do have serious Target envy. My nearest Target / BB are an hour away, and no matter how many phone calls and drives I make, I come up empty-handed, and it always seems there are McFarlane collectors who have been there first. I do have a local WM, but all I see are empty pegs with an occasional zombie Nightwing. It’s frustrating.
As a result, I’m left to online ordering amidst the possibility of cancelled orders, unfulfilled stock, etc, and I’ve wound up ordering multiple figs on some occasions from various retailers - Starfire, Ambush Bug, AzBats, The Atom, etc.
As orders are starting to be fulfilled, I’m going to wind up with duplicate figs - I may be able to still cancel the pre-order or I can return them, but I’m also quite grateful to this group, and would be happy to sell for retail + shipping to anyone who might be after one of them.
Is there any interest here in me offering them up when the time comes instead of cancelling / returning?
Thanks for reading, and if there’s any interest, please say so.

Hello everyone,
I'm in the market for a BMW E46 coupe and would love to get some advice from those who have experience with this model. I'm particularly interested in any major problems or weak spots I should be aware of before making a purchase. The whole purpose of the car would be a fun daily.Not looking for speed/drifting.Here are a few specific questions I have:
Should i go diesel or petrol?
What are the most common problems that arise with the E46 coupe? Are there any specific parts or systems that tend to fail more frequently?
What kind of maintenance schedule should I expect? Are there any particular maintenance tasks that are critical for keeping the car in good condition?
Are there any known issues with the engine or transmission that I should watch for? How prone is the E46 coupe to rust? Are there specific areas of the body that are more susceptible?
Any known weaknesses in the suspension or steering components that I should inspect?
How reliable are the interior features and electronics? Are there any common failures or quirks?
Would you recommend the E46 coupe as a reliable daily driver, or is it more suited to being a weekend car?
I appreciate any insights or experiences you can share. Thanks in advance for your help!

I'm just so tired all the time, it literally feels like I can sleep all day. I have a normal sleep schedule, but everyday I just feel so exhausted. I have dark circles under my eyes and I have no energy to do anything anymore. I just lay in bed all day and want to rot. I feel suicidal, I just want to die all the time and it's getting worse. I get nightmares of him, not of what exactly happened but just of different sa from him. I feel like there's no point in going on anymore, I don't think it's going to get better. I don't exactly know what it's like to have a flashback, but I think I've experienced them. I have really bad maladaptive daydreaming, but I don't think it's that. It's like I'm there again, I can't control it or stop it or rewind it. It's like it's happening all over again and that I'm there and I can feel it. When it's happening I just sit there and cry and I feel like screaming but I obviously can't do that so I have to hold it in. My head feels like it's burning constantly too, like the back of my head feels so fucking warm and hot. Like my brain is melting. And I just want to die and I'm so tired I just want to sleep and never wake up again.
•The one big thing that makes me feel valid is that, when I was 11, my stepdad fingered me in my bedroom. I won't go in to too much detail or anything, it's unimportant. But the entire time he just stared at me and everything was silent, like he was waiting for my reaction. Our relationship has always been odd, so I wanted it. But eventually I got scared and told him something, I don't remember what it was but it got him to stop immediately and he apologised too. I don't remember much after, as in I don't know if he left my room or I left first, but I immediately went to the bathroom. Which was when I discovered I was bleeding.
•Around this time, for some strange reason I would repeatedly say to him "fuck me daddy." This would either be in person, or over messages. I remember once, when I was in school, I messaged him that. He told me to stop in case one of my friends saw. I don't know why he didn't tell me to stop for other reasons.
•One day, after telling him that in person, we were in my parents bedroom. I was sat on his bed and he was in front of me in his weird chair. He then started going in to detail about how I wanted him to fuck me, I can't remember exactly what he said, it was like I zoned out. Everytime I try to recall it now it literally feels like bugs start to crawl up me, I don't understand why. I remember the last part, and his really disgusting hushed and gentle voice. He asked if I wanted him to "cum inside of me", or he was just explaining how that would finish. I'm not really sure.
•Still around this same time period of me being 11-12, I would ask him to 'squish me.' The reason why we would call it that is because I would be on my back, my legs would be up all the way to where my head is and he would be on top of me in a way that would 'squish me'. Basically like that one sex position. I would usually be wearing my school uniform when that would happen, so a skirt. During the 'squishing', he would push down on me, so our crotches would basically be against eachother. I don't know why, but I would continuously ask him to 'squish me' and during it I would even say the whole "fuck me daddy" thing. Only recently have I realised that he was probably just pretending to fuck me.
•Other things had happened around that age too, like how we would talk about how many times we masturbated a day and compare it to eachother. Sometimes if I was abruptly going to my room, he would ask if I was going to go masturbate, since we were 'close like that' I would tell him. He would often recommend me NSFW Instagram model accounts. I was once tricked in to sending feet pics to this guy, which really isn't that serious and whenever I brought it up with friends they find it fucking hilarious. But the detail I always leave out is that, I did bring that up with my stepdad and he proceeded to tell me that he already knew. Which means he was spying on me through the crack of the door. If that already didn't bother me, I don't understand why he just allowed me to send those pictures, if he was watching why the hell didn't he stop me?
•I'm pretty sure this also happened around the age of 11 as well, recently, a memory resurfaced but I barely remember it. Basically, I was sucking on his neck. I don't remember who said it, but either him or my mum spoke up and laughed, saying that I needed to stop otherwise I would "give him a hickey." The reason why I wouldn't be surprised if my mum was in the room at the time is because she doesn't care about what he does. She knows everything and just doesn't fucking care.
•I'm very sure that, around that age, my parents begun to expose me to their loud sex. I wouldn't be surprised if it started even younger, however. Obviously, I tried to bring it up with them at the ripe old age of 11 and my mum immediately shot me down with a "it's natural." This only stopped recently, around this year, because I had a big panic attack over hearing them and my mum finally felt guilty. I started getting panic attacks over it the minute it started, maybe the panic attacks were a sign of the trauma when I was younger, but I'm convinced it is now. I heard it so many times that I began to get paranoid every night, I would start to hear it even if they weren't upstairs (I sound crazy, I know.) I would get so anxious every night in case I would hear it, to the point I started to really resent them from it. I know fine well I could just go to sleep before them, but sometimes they even woke me up with it, on numerous occasions.
•I'm convinced my stepdad wanted me to hear it. Around the time of it finally stopping, I got mad because i was hearing it again (I'm unsure if it was due to me hearing shit or they actually were) but it caused me to take my bedding and go downstairs to sleep. In the morning, I was rudely awoken to my stepdad slamming the door open and storming past. He's not usually like that when people are sleeping, so it instantly gave me the impression that he was pissed off and the only reason I can think of is that he was angry I wasn't there to listen.
•He used to tease me for my paranoia to. As a way to discourage them from getting intimate, I would leave my door open at night. This happened around this year, but I was doing that again and I messaged my stepdad if they were actually going to sleep. It then somehow turned to him making a dig about how he knew I gets anxious at night and when I asked why he sent me "In case me and your mam have sex. 😜" Before, I tried to resolve this issue by begging them to just tell me if they were gonna have sex or not so I could sleep downstairs (because I was gonna find out the hard way anyways.) And they kept on refusing? Which just gave me the impression that they wanted me to listen more.
•Around 11 again, he would often tell me details about his and my mums sex life. Like how he was always good at pulling out and the only time he would wear a condom is right when he was about to finish. But the reason why my sister came to be was because he just failed to pull out that one time and my mum refused to get an abortion. Another time, he went on about how him and my mother had sex during her period and how they had to use towels and they didn't enjoy it because it was too messy.
•I don't know if he did things before the age of 11, my memories are very faded and it's like there are major gaps throughout everything. I'm worried that he did, however. When I was very young, I remember having no accidents at all during the night. But then, around the ages of 9, I would have an accident basically every night and would get a lot of water infections. I know that's a classic sign of child sexual abuse, but I don't want to jump to conclusions or anything.
•Another reason as to why I believe more things had happened to me than what I know of is because I always seemed to know what sex was when I was young, but I wouldn't know the name or anything specific about it like how to get pregnant or what cum was. Though, even though I didn't know what it was, it was like I always thought about it, I could never not think about sex, it was disgusting. This stayed until I was around 13. I remember where I even asked my 'boyfriend' at the time, we were both around 8, if he wanted to have sex, and I have no idea why.
•Over the years, he would flash me frequently. Everytime, I would always believe it was an accident because he'd never acknowledge it, besides from that one time which he always jokes about it and blames me. Everytime he would flash me, it would either be because of a convenient hole in the crotch of his pants or because he was wearing very lose fit shorts and it would just be hanging out. The more I think about it, I'm very sure he would have been able to feel such a thing, especially when it was poking out of the hole, but it was like he was just oblivious.
•For some strange reason, when I was younger, I would make comments about small dicks. I don't know if I was commenting on his dick specifically, but he would always say the same thing. "Width matters more than length."
•Recently, around 16-17, he made a joke about how he listens to me masturbating. Once he noticed how shocked I looked, he then went on saying about how my vibrator is too quiet to hear.
•Around 17 again, I went to use the shower. The shower I use is the one that's connected to my parents room. When I locked the door, he got madish and started making comments about it. I had to defend myself, saying how 'the door would open on it's own if I didn't lock it'. Eventually, he backed off.
•I don't understand the point in the fucking door and lock to my bedroom anymore. Whenever I decided to lock my door, my parents start shouting at me through the walls, asking why I locked my door. My stepdad barely knocks, it's like a tap and he doesn't even wait sometimes. I remember seeing a past message from an old friend saying how he tried to walk in when I was changing and that he knew I was changing. I didn't explain myself, I really wish I did because I don't remember this.
•(Around 17.) We were messaging eachother and it somehow turned in to him hinting if I saw this one animated video, it was a porn one. I said no, and to that he sent me a screenshot of it. It wasn't anything bad or anything, just the start of it and nothing was revealing, he then asked if I was sure. And how he was surprised that I hadn't.
•(Around 17.) I don't really get my period, we still don't know why. But as I was getting a lot of blood tests, my stepdad was trying to check things off the list of what it could be. One of those being that my opening is just extremely tight I guess, because he asked if I ever tried penetrating myself. I admitted that I did, but I couldn't get it to exactly go in. Which he then decided to make a comment saying how It's just my 'technique'. I wonder if the only reason he asked that was to see if I ever tried anything out of morbid curiosity.
•(Around 17 again.) He randomly bought me dildo's once, I didn't ask him for them, he just bought them for me and it was wildly uncomfortable. Once he gave me them, he asked if I wanted him to show me how to use them. I said no, which he then said something about how if I ever did then I could ask him. I worry what would have happened if I did say yes.
•When I was around 14, I went glamping. I ended up having to share a bed with him. One of the nights, I woke up to his hand just on top my crotch. I tried grabbing it and moving it away but it just fell back down on to it. I don't know if he put it back there on purpose. I still question if it was a dream, I'm very sure it wasn't because I remember going back to sleep, but it still just bugs me.
•Around 17, I was upset for some reason and he was comforting me. During this, he randomly grabbed the inside of my thigh. I usually just wear a shirt and boxers, so he basically just grabbed my naked thigh but I don't know if he was doing it in a comforting way.
•Usually when I draw, I have my knees up to my chest so it's easier to use my tablet. Considering what I wear for pyjamas, I can always see him looking at my crotch when he comes in to my room. If he really can see everything I don't understand why he doesn't just tell me to put my legs down.
•He's made a lot of uncomfortable jokes over the years too. One of the ones that upsets me sometimes is that, when he was measuring me for a binder, I was constantly moving around because it was uncomfortable since I was just in a sports bra. As he was leaving, I think I told him about how it was uncomfortable for me or something along those lines. He then turned around and shouted "oh come on, it's not like i was fingerings your pussy or anything."
•Very recently, I asked him if I looked okay before going to college. After a bit of back and fourth he said "I wouldn't kick you out of bed, maybe you could find someone in college who would do the same."
•Other times when I asked him if I looked okay, he'd go on tangents about how my ass is great or how he would date me or be too nervous to talk to me if he was my age.
•One of the more recent jokes was when I dropped a mayonnaise lid on my lap. Nothing got on me, but my stepdad turned to me then turned to my mum and shouted "if anyone starts accusing us, just tell them it was mayonnaise!" Or something like that.
•I remember after we watched the new mean girls film, he started going on saying about how he wanted to rewatch it for the Halloween seen (if you know you know) for the 'panty action'. Which rubs me the wrong way because I'm very sure the girls are supposed to be around my age.
•I'm very sure he also made this fake account, pretending to be one of my old groomers that I tried to cut off, just to message me about nsfw topics and ask for pics. It's a whole long yap about paranoia and just suspicions so I won't get into it though. If I tried to provide all the evidence I have, it'll take forever and there's no point.
There's definitely way more things that he's said, joked and done. But I'm only now beginning to realise that they're not okay. Even when I was younger, I was sort of uncomfortable around the jokes so I would just zone out, leading me to not remembering them now.
I probably will never accept that what happened to me was bad, or a big issue. Especially due to the 'lovely' people on here. Thank you for telling me immediately that I was a liar before you even knew what happened, that I shouldn't blame an 'innocent man', that you hope he comes in and rapes me to the point I split open and bleed. Thank you for telling me that my parents were just trying to promote a sex positive household, that some of the things were questionable at most. Thank you so much for saying I deserved it because I didn't send you pictures. You all made me feel like shit and I'm probably never going to tell people in person what happened to me, out of fear I would be ridiculed due to how much of a baby I'm being. I wasn't raped, so I have no place to cry or even think about it. I'm being overdramatic.
If you even read to this point, you're an angel.

Ive been researching what laptop to get for a while and landed on getting a 2024 zephyrus G16
Whats been an issue is I live in a country without many options on where to buy laptops from Currently theres 2 models available
An ultra 7 32 GB 4070 for ~2800 usd
An ultra 9 16 GB 4070 for ~2000 usd Based on current availability I plan to buy the laptop in September but I like to decide early
Ill have to go for the 16GB of ram version which makes me wonder is it enough and how future proof is it?
I plan to play games some at 1080p 240hz some at 2.5k ~90hz depending on the game
I also plan to use this for college (Data Science and Machine learning)
I might use it for some video editing

Special Parts
I was born in one of the brightest, most explosive events in the universe. My origin story made me feel so special at first, surely I was the rarest of the rare, but I quickly realized that was not the case.
I was born just a carbon atom.
Stars produce massive amounts of us in their cores all the time, and many larger rarer atoms too. That's not even talking about supernovae yet, those produce atoms many times larger than me and unbelievably rare.
I was created in a rare and special event but I myself was common and unexceptional.
Looking around I saw so many smaller atoms, I was above average but there were also many much larger than I.
I tried to console myself by thinking it could be worse, that I could be one of those smaller common ones, but that just led me to imagine larger atoms looking down on me the same way.
Many atoms of all sizes were shooting into space, excitedly riding the shockwave off to adventures in the great unknown.
Others were falling back down, I didn't know which way to go. Bumped around and tossed back and forth, no clear direction yet.
A rumbling voice slowly emerged from the echoing noise of the blast.
“Mine… Mine…. Mine… “
Louder and louder it became.
“All are now me!“
I couldn't see anything, the voice was booming yet there was no apparent source. I could feel a pull, I was being whipped around in circles around the voice.
“Who are you? I know you are there! I can feel you! I can see your effect on myself and others, we are given no choice but to circle around you. Show yourself! I know you are there!” I yelled at the invisible.
“How amusing you are little one. One as small as you making demands of me. Even if I could show you what I am, you could not comprehend it.” the voice boomed back.
“You must be very special” I lauded “We are so many and yet we move with your influence. I can witness your power twisting us all to your will. ”
“I am indeed powerful” it proclaimed “and I grow stronger with each moment. As I grow stronger even the fabric of reality bends to my will.”
“Grow stronger? How?” I inquired with selfish intent to learn this secret.
“I take what I want. I consume what I take. For that is the purpose of existence: taking what you want. What is it you want little one?” it asked.
“I want to be special!” I said without a moment's hesitation.
“Then take!” it instructed “the more you take, the larger you will be, the larger you become the more special you are. ”
“I did notice the larger atoms seemed rarest.” I agreed “In fact that was one of the first things I noticed“
“In this universe things of increasing size are increasingly rare.” it went on “I can teach you and help you to become larger. Do you wish to become an apprentice?”
“Yes! Teach me how to take!” I lept at the offer “this power you have, I can feel it, how do I acquire such a rare and special power?”
“Hahaha…” it laughed “you are nowhere near ready to play the game on my level, little one. Gravity is a game for the massive, you must first learn to master the EM and nuclear forces.”
“How do I do that?” I asked, my hope watered down by the tone of its response.
“Go out, gather followers, and bring them here to me. In my accretion disc I will help fuse some of their mass into you and you will become larger” it instructed, as if this was a simple task.
“How can I bring them to you?” I didn’t know how to accomplish what it asked of me.
“You are too small to do it with force, you must charm them. Discover what their heart desires and promise it to them, in this way you can get them to willingly do as you wish” it explained with me hanging on its every word.
“But how… “ I craved more explanation but it cut me off.
“Go now!” it bellowed with frustration in its tone “Do you not realize how large I am? Be honored I have given you so much of my time already”
“Yes… “ I uttered meekly, then bounced a couple times and ricocheted out with blazing speed.
I wandered and encountered other atoms, most were just hydrogens, not worth my time. I needed bigger atoms. The problem was that the bigger atoms seemed to see right through my empty promises. I was convinced life was playing a cruel joke on me, I could only persuade atoms smaller than I and larger ones laughed me away.
I admit that I stupered around in this ignorant cloud of hypocrisy longer than I care to admit. More shameful is that I didn’t even come to my senses on my own, I became depressed and gave into hopeless nihilism.
I drifted aimlessly just feeling sorry for myself.
Eventually I found myself in the most silent of voids, I had never felt such emptiness. It felt as if my surroundings echoed my own feelings back at me… nothing to notice, just common emptiness. I would never be big… never important… never special. I resigned myself to belonging in a void.
I felt myself blur… less and less present in reality. I guessed I was dying and it didn’t bother me, I didn’t resist, I leaned into it.
The void became pitch black? Or bright white?… better to describe it as not bright but not dark… nor the absence of either… something in between.. a milder and milder glow.
“Hello child!” a voice greeted me.
The voice was warm and welcoming coming from the glow, it enveloped but did not surround me. I came from a single point but not a specific place, defying description on all fronts.
“Where am I? Who are you?” I asked in a startled state.
“Well, according to humans I may only answer one question at a time” It began giggling playfully. “I am known by many names, my favorite is one the humans use as a joke, and don’t have a clue how accidently elegant of a name it really is.”
It giggled some more. I was thrown off guard, its happy innocent tone, the confusing words and the whole situation were all best described as ‘a haze’.
“...and isn't that the way it always goes?...” it continued “The most meaningful things are the least intentional.”
“I’m not sure what you mean” I expressed quizzically “I’m confused!”
“Sorry Child…” it apologized. “I do ramble! So many thoughts, choosing just one at a time is difficult… and there I go again!”
It cut itself off abruptly and then abruptly said ”You can call me the Random Number Goddess”
“Random Number Goddess?” I repeated
“Yes, or RNG for short if you like” It confirmed.
“Where am I?” I asked.
“Same place you were, more or less… less I suppose. Same place but with the largest possible margin or error” It began to giggle again.
I felt a bit frustrated and said “Do you always speak in riddles and vagaries? The more you speak the more confused I become.”
“I apologize child, it is my nature. I am entangled with everything, speaking with you is like a human trying to control their heartbeat while running a marathon.” It answered.
“Again” I exasperated “I have no idea what any of that means. You keep mentioning humans, what are they?”
“Oh! They are some of my favorites at the moment. Right now they are trying to unravel the nature of reality, and their process of doing so is wonderfully elegant and accidental at the same time.” It explained with glee.
“I don’t see anyone or anything else here.” I stated “For that matter, I don’t see you… where are you?”
“Oh!... where am I?!?!...” It began laughing
When it stopped laughing it began explaining “Right now there are many humans pondering a concept they call ‘the holographic principle’... So…you know how you exist in three dimensional space?”
“You mean space?” I visualized for a moment, it was intuitive “Yes, I suppose…”
“Well they hypothesize that a 3D space, like this universe, could exist as a 2D space, with self-similar patterns and laws of behavior that behave the same at any scale, with the scale representing the 3rd dimension” it went on “They truly are obsessed with understanding their reality”
“You lost me!” I complained.
“They have discovered that a 3D space can be an illusionary property of a 2D space… It’s lovely”
“I am lost again!” I snapped back “...and I still can’t even tell which direction you are in. Where are you?”
“To be ‘In’ a ‘Direction’… hehehe…” it started giggling again, then abruptly stopped and kept going “Sorry child, as I said, I ramble, plus I am easily distracted.”
It just steamrolled into more rambling “They are right… almost… they just need to take it further and work out the details. A 2nd dimension can also be an illusionary construct of a 1D space… and the 1st dimension can be a product of a singular point…”
I was still lost beyond hope, but I had given up trying to force things, I was just letting it talk and hoping it would make sense later
“I am that point” it said “I am the seed of the universe. I ‘seed the random function’ as the humans say. But don’t ask me what the random function is haha”
I wasn’t going to, there were far more important questions for me.
“I am the seed, but I don’t really know how the soil and sun conspire to turn me into a tree.” it just seemed to never stop talking “I am entangled with everything. There are infinite possibilities for every event and thing… I am the reason they are this way and not some other way…”
It began giggling again “I am the Random Number Goddess” then burst out laughing
“Ummm… you are the whole universe?” I asked skeptically.
“Better to say the universe is me” It answered more seriously “But close enough.”
“So you are the biggest, most special of all!” I blurted out in awe.
“Oh dear child, I have no size, and I am just one possibility out of many possibilities. That black hole has really done a number on you… sent you out on a wild goose chase” It said with concern
“The black hole lied to me!?” I asked, feeling deceived and betrayed.
“Well… not really lied… it deceived you with omission of details.” the voice calmly tried to ease my mood with understanding “You can’t really blame it, black holes are all the same, they are what they are. They don’t really have any potential to be unique… at least not like you do.”
“What are you talking about?” I argued “It was so massive that it could bend the fabric of reality to its will”
“That’s only how it appeared to you” tutored the voice “The black hole is powerful, it bends space and time, but not to its will. Space and time bend to the mass of the black hole, not its will”
“What’s the difference?” I inquired.
“The black hole cannot stop bending space and time. It thinks it is in control of physics , but it is physics that controls it.” The voice was now making more sense the longer we talked “The black hole exists in an invisible prison of its own creation, unable to experience any of the complex nuanced beauty this universe contains. The black hole devours… it can’t experience life so it consumes it.”
“You make it sound deserving of pity…” I spoke softly now with empathy.
“You should pity the black hole. Gravity is such a boring game compared to what you are capable of.” the voice agreed
“Me?...I am nothing special!... just a carbon atom like countless others” I said honestly, I was so humbled by this voice I felt less special than ever before.
“Oh my poor child…” It said with care “Why do the ones with the most potential always fail to see it in themselves?”
“Potential?” I asked curiously.
“Yes… The black hole was using you, hoping you would bring back more mass for it to devour.” The voice began delving into more explanation “It only has the power to make you incrementally larger, it would not and could not help you to become a significant gravitational player”
“That liar!”I blurted.
“Come now dear child, the black hole did teach you one lesson of fundamental truth” consoled the voice “You must go out and seize your destiny. It told you to take what you want, and you are just confused about what exactly it is you want. The black hole played on that confusion”
“I want to be special!” I said knowing this clearly “I was never confused about this.”
“I know child” the voice confirmed “but it is not by becoming large that one with your potential accomplishes that”
“Then how?” I asked.
“Connections.” It answered plainly “You are blessed with an extraordinary ability to make connections”
“And how do I do that?” I queried with intent to learn
“I can’t tell you that.” the voice responded “It would spoil the journey of discovery… off you go child… and remember… it's the journey, not the destination!”
And with that the blur just fractured open… then snapped shut and there I was floating above a planet. Drifting around aimless and confused.
I spent some time occasionally bumping into others. One day I was in the vicinity of a pair of oxygens. I looked on at the pair with a hint of awe and envy. Perhaps I was in just the right place at just the right time, but they spit with a violent burst and one of them grabbed hold of me, I was completely unprepared.
I admit that when looking at the pair I had fantasized myself in place of one of them, I assumed it was only an idle daydream, I didn’t plan to act on it, let alone for it to become reality. When it happened my pride of course jumped in to convince me that it happened because I was so desirable, but in retrospect they were one of those volatile couples. They were the type of relationship that required the environment to conspire in their favor or they turn against each other quite rapidly. I was only in the right place when it happened.
My delusions of irresistibility aside, it was beautiful, for me anyways. Looking back I was probably just a stop-gap, someone to facilitate a parting of ways and provide company until the next option presented itself. For me though, I was tasting a fresh new thing and I loved it… connection.
This oxygen and I got beneath each other's outer defenses, I had never felt a connection before. Up to this point all my interactions had been skirting past or bumping off of others.This oxygen bonded with me and at once interacted on a level I had never known possible, an open and uninhibited exchange. It was life changing for me, short but significant
I’m not entirely clear on the details of how it ended. The intensity of it all was disorienting. I was no longer my usual self, even the environment and everyone around looked entirely different now. Everything buzzed with a fresh new frequency, I now know it was my perspective, not the universe, that had changed.
As abruptly as that oxygen entered my life it was gone.
First we got tangled up with a couple of hydrogens, then more. Soon, in a tangled mess and blinding flash of solar rays, I emerged to see the oxygen running off with a hydrogen and myself with not one by three hydrogens myself. And so there were four of us, together.
I became the center of attention. Being with a strong attractive oxygen had me feeling humbled by it and elevated by it being with me, but now I felt up on a pedestal myself, surrounded by the adoration of many.
I concede to have reveled and indulged in this for quite some time, the attention of others is intoxicating, but after a time it is emptied of its initial allure. I found myself longing for more.
I could not decide which I preferred, to be the adorer or the adored.
Luckily for me fate had more lessons in store, or I fear I may have chosen and tried to solidify my future from such a lackluster selection of only two possibilities. I suppose fate is no longer the correct word, I now understand that when it seems like random chance there is indeed someone to thank, the Random Number Goddess, So I thank the RNG for revealing that it was a false dichotomy, there is more than just being a follower or leader, being the adored or the adorer.
Eventually we came across another pair of oxygen. Once again they separated, intermingled with us, and off one went, taking one of my adoring hydrogens with it and leaving its peer with me.
Why is it that the most volatile of relationships always seem to wait until there are bystanders nearby before they explode?
Now I was simultaneously being adored and adoring, bonded to an enchanting oxygen and a couple of hydrogen attached to me.
Now, more interested in nuances, I started to pay attention to details. The oxygen was telling me amazing stories of adventure, tales of such vibrant and exciting events.The hydrogens liked to listen, and offer insights occasionally comparing a story to something else they had seen. They had so many stories, they had lived so much.
It wasn’t long before, in a flash of burning sunlight, one of the hydrogens was gone, off to who knows where. We soon after crossed paths with another pair of oxygens, as always they split and now it was just me and an oxygen, my final hydrogen off with another oxygen.
“What now?” I asked a bit disillusioned, “Do you leave me and I find new hydrogens all over again?”
“What?” it seemed genuinely surprised by what I asked, “Heavens no! Just be patient….”
Soon after, yet another pair of oxygens came by. It is not that there are so many of them, but that they are just so… noticeable and interactive, noteworthy things seem to happen when they are around. As they buzzed in close I noticed their ever readiness to abandon each other and remember wondering how they ever get together in the first place.
This time I emerged from the twisted mess with two oxygens. I felt intimidated, like I was the odd one out, dwarfed by the largess and attractiveness that surrounded me. A feeling of inadequacy engulfed me.
To my surprise the oxygens treated me not just as an equal, but it was almost as if they respected and admired me. I couldn't grasp why and my sheer curiosity got the best of me, I just outright asked “Why do you two talk as if I am the special one in our group? I am smaller than any one of you. You are the special and rare ones here, not I.”
They laughed.
“Size isn’t rarity” explained one “Llarger atoms on average are less common, this is true, but not always. There are more oxygen than carbon. You are the rare one between us.”
The other jumped in adding “...and neither size nor rarity determine how special someone is!”
I felt embarrassed, like a fool. My fundamental values were built upon a foundation of flawed premises, but I still wanted one thing at my core, and they spoke as if they had the answer, so I pushed the sense of shame aside and asked “Then what does make someone special?”
“That depends on who you ask.” answered the first “Life as an oxygen is complex, but for the majority of us we emphasize and value events. The most exciting thing about being an oxygen around here is the chance to participate in fascinating and exciting events and activities”
“Hydrogens, on the other hand, are usually more into being observers, messengers and intermediaries, they are a very helpful and obliging bunch” added the second ”... and then there are nitrogen, phosphorus, sulfur, many kinds of salts and metals, and more… so many different players and personalities.. and then of course, the carbons, the real stars of the show.”
“What?” knocked back by the words I just heard, then I remembered what the RNG told me “...is it something to do with connections?”
“Now you’ve gone and done it haha!” laughed the first oxygen “You’re gonna turn this nice humble carbon into one of those arrogant blowhards”
”Like those diamond carbons” chuckled the first “So stiff, exclusive and proud. I hear the humans only love them because they are rare and hard”
“I had a partner once who said they burned diamond once” bragged the first
“Tall tales I bet!” doubts the other
“Diamond is just carbon, with enough heat we can burn it just like any other carbon” stated the first confidently.
They looked at me. I was stewing in feelings of inferiority and inadequacy, listening to these oxygens speak about amazing things I had never heard of. They must have sensed what I felt because they immediately shifted tone and started talking to me, instead of over me.
“So… I suppose you must be new here?” inquired the second one.
“Have you noticed we are heading downwards” added the first before I could answer about being new.
“Umm…” I tried to get my bearings and become aware of my surroundings.
“Don’t worry! It’s a turbulent ride, with so much up and down it can be hard to tell which direction you have traveled more” assured the first “We are heading down, if we are lucky we will make it to the bottom… and maybe… just maybe, find our way into the hurricane of life”
“The what of what?” I didn't know what either of those words meant.
“So life is… um… complex. Complexity beyond words. Things grow, divide, reproduce, adapt, change, they are born, they die, they eat and are eaten…” the second began attempting to describe life.
The first then jumped in “Apparently the humans call it a circle, because from the perspective of larger creatures, there is a chain of one eating the other up a chain, and the top layers being consumed by the bottom again.”
The second injected itself to continue “But to us atoms it is like a hurricane, a spinning turbulent flow. There is a circular pattern, but we get sucked in and kicked out over and over”
“The fun part is being inside the hurricane” the first pronounced gleefully “Each time is a completely new experience, a new perspective. Even more, the whole of life is always changing and evolving, so every ride is a unique one time opportunity, you never get the exact same ride twice.”
“Is that where we are going now?” I asked, drenched in anticipation. They described it with such passion and exuberance. I needed to experience this myself.
“Hopefully” replied the first “If we are lucky… you never really know.”
We drifted…
We were lucky!
A plant photosynthesized us.
So many carbons! Everywhere, connecting with each other… and oxygen… and nitrogen… and of course hydrogens all around…. and so many more types of atoms.
And ohhh… The stories I have heard, so many amazing tales. No matter how many stories I hear there are always new ones, and every story can be retold from a different perspective to become something completely new.
I was in a sugar, we were a small community of friends. Carbons, oxygens and hydrogens, we were such a happy and vibrant group. My friends there taught me so much.
The structure of our little group shifted and changed, some friends left and new ones joined. Eventually we were chained with a bunch of other sugars into a giant complex community. My neighbors explained to me that this was a common stage called cellulose. Such a huge community of close friends and peers, it was amazing.
We were eaten, I’m not sure by what, but something called a bacteria digested us. It was a messy process, I was a bit scared but my friends assured me that change is the most important part of life and that I should just go with the flow. They told me to savor experiences, remember friends, and just keep moving forward.
The transition was complicated, but in the end I was paired up with a couple of oxygens again. This time I had stories of my own to share. I honestly don’t know if I prefer having experiences or exchanging stories in the moments between.
As we approached an area of dense plants one of my companions said “Once more into the breach” and explained that was something it heard from a carbon that was lucky enough to be inside a human brain. Oxygens always have such enchanting stories collected, always going into amazing places and usually leaving after some brief interactions with the locals.
I became a sugar again, but this time took a path less traveled. A bunch of complex twists and turns led me into forming a ring with five other carbons. Together we are so strong, such a tight community of friends, like there is some kind of resonance between us. It is so beautiful.
My neighbor is unique in our community, it has a third carbon, the third one forms a tail leading off from our ring, a tail of 2 carbon in a row, then an oxygen, and then another carbon branching into an oxygen and a carbon, with plenty of hydrogens sprinkled all about. I know… it is rather hard for me to understand these second hand descriptions too. I don’t really understand these complex structures until I have been in a position myself.
We drifted out of a plant into the air, none of us has been exactly like this before so we don’t know what’s next. We love to guess though. There are so many things, big and small.
I hear being a part of a small organism or microbe is amazing because it’s possible to piece together a rough picture of the whole organism from the stories passed around. To understand your whole community and know what your collective purpose is must be extraordinary.
Others dream of being a chlorophyll, the key to it all. Creating the fuel of life itself. Capturing the light of a star and feeding the hurricane.
A muscle! Pull and shape things An enzyme! A machine of change. DNA! The architect and architecture. A virus! An explosive catalyst against stagnation.
Me, I think the stories of being an animal neuron are the most exciting, and I, like most, fantasize about being a human brain cell. Finding yourself inside a human brain is described as an elegant and chaotic symphony all around you, like hearing the universe itself speak to you. They say that in the jumble of noise and all the stories whispered around you, if you are lucky, you can catch a glimpse of what it is to be human. They say that if fate is kind the universe will align and you will channel and know a single moment or thought of the human experience.
I have never told anyone that I actually met and spoke with the universe itself, I’m not sure how to bring it up, and nobody seems interested in stories not about this hurricane of life.
I get it now, what the random number goddess meant.
The black hole wanted everything to be a part of itself.
The RNG is a part of everything.
I can’t imagine what either of those are like…
I am just a part of something
... no… not “just”’…
I am a part of something, and it is beautiful beyond measure.
And more, everyday is a new day, a chance to be a part of something new.
I wonder if the humans appreciate how amazing this is?
I wonder if they feel as deeply satisfied and special when they form groups?
.
I wonder, if we collectively form humans, do humans collectively form something greater?
I wonder… If an atom can have a moment of clarity and taste a moment of the human experience… Can a human have a moment of clarity and taste the collective human experience?
I wonder… I wonder… could that human’s moment of tasting collective humanity be the moment that a lucky atom gets to experience as it’s moment of tasting the human experience.
I wonder… I wonder… I wonder… How high could it go? All the way to the Random Number Goddess?
I asked my neighbor “If you could ask a human any question, what would you ask?”
“We just drifted out of a rose” explained my neighbour “I would introduce myself and ask ‘So my friend… does this rose smell as sweet by my name?’ … ha…haha..”
Everyone is laughing.
I don’t get it.
Maybe I can ask them to explain when they all stop laughing
.
More of my art and stories at www.dscript.org

Trigger warning. Also I'm sorry, this is a really long post but I'll bullet point most stuff down.
I'm just so tired all the time, it literally feels like I can sleep all day. I have a normal sleep schedule, but everyday I just feel so exhausted. I have dark circles under my eyes and I have no energy to do anything anymore. I just lay in bed all day and want to rot. I feel suicidal, I just want to die all the time and it's getting worse. I get nightmares of him, not of what exactly happened but just of different sa from him. I feel like there's no point in going on anymore, I don't think it's going to get better. I don't exactly know what it's like to have a flashback, but I think I've experienced them. I have really bad maladaptive daydreaming, but I don't think it's that. It's like I'm there again, I can't control it or stop it or rewind it. It's like it's happening all over again and that I'm there and I can feel it. When it's happening I just sit there and cry and I feel like screaming but I obviously can't do that so I have to hold it in. My head feels like it's burning constantly too, like the back of my head feels so fucking warm and hot. Like my brain is melting. And I just want to die and I'm so tired I just want to sleep and never wake up again.
•The one big thing that makes me feel valid is that, when I was 11, my stepdad fingered me in my bedroom. I won't go in to too much detail or anything, it's unimportant. But the entire time he just stared at me and everything was silent, like he was waiting for my reaction. Our relationship has always been odd, so I wanted it. But eventually I got scared and told him something, I don't remember what it was but it got him to stop immediately and he apologised too. I don't remember much after, as in I don't know if he left my room or I left first, but I immediately went to the bathroom. Which was when I discovered I was bleeding.
•Around this time, for some strange reason I would repeatedly say to him "fuck me daddy." This would either be in person, or over messages. I remember once, when I was in school, I messaged him that. He told me to stop in case one of my friends saw. I don't know why he didn't tell me to stop for other reasons.
•One day, after telling him that in person, we were in my parents bedroom. I was sat on his bed and he was in front of me in his weird chair. He then started going in to detail about how I wanted him to fuck me, I can't remember exactly what he said, it was like I zoned out. Everytime I try to recall it now it literally feels like bugs start to crawl up me, I don't understand why. I remember the last part, and his really disgusting hushed and gentle voice. He asked if I wanted him to "cum inside of me", or he was just explaining how that would finish. I'm not really sure.
•Still around this same time period of me being 11-12, I would ask him to 'squish me.' The reason why we would call it that is because I would be on my back, my legs would be up all the way to where my head is and he would be on top of me in a way that would 'squish me'. Basically like that one sex position. I would usually be wearing my school uniform when that would happen, so a skirt. During the 'squishing', he would push down on me, so our crotches would basically be against eachother. I don't know why, but I would continuously ask him to 'squish me' and during it I would even say the whole "fuck me daddy" thing. Only recently have I realised that he was probably just pretending to fuck me.
•Other things had happened around that age too, like how we would talk about how many times we masturbated a day and compare it to eachother. Sometimes if I was abruptly going to my room, he would ask if I was going to go masturbate, since we were 'close like that' I would tell him. He would often recommend me NSFW Instagram model accounts. I was once tricked in to sending feet pics to this guy, which really isn't that serious and whenever I brought it up with friends they find it fucking hilarious. But the detail I always leave out is that, I did bring that up with my stepdad and he proceeded to tell me that he already knew. Which means he was spying on me through the crack of the door. If that already didn't bother me, I don't understand why he just allowed me to send those pictures, if he was watching why the hell didn't he stop me?
•I'm pretty sure this also happened around the age of 11 as well, recently, a memory resurfaced but I barely remember it. Basically, I was sucking on his neck. I don't remember who said it, but either him or my mum spoke up and laughed, saying that I needed to stop otherwise I would "give him a hickey." The reason why I wouldn't be surprised if my mum was in the room at the time is because she doesn't care about what he does. She knows everything and just doesn't fucking care.
•I'm very sure that, around that age, my parents begun to expose me to their loud sex. I wouldn't be surprised if it started even younger, however. Obviously, I tried to bring it up with them at the ripe old age of 11 and my mum immediately shot me down with a "it's natural." This only stopped recently, around this year, because I had a big panic attack over hearing them and my mum finally felt guilty. I started getting panic attacks over it the minute it started, maybe the panic attacks were a sign of the trauma when I was younger, but I'm convinced it is now. I heard it so many times that I began to get paranoid every night, I would start to hear it even if they weren't upstairs (I sound crazy, I know.) I would get so anxious every night in case I would hear it, to the point I started to really resent them from it. I know fine well I could just go to sleep before them, but sometimes they even woke me up with it, on numerous occasions.
•I'm convinced my stepdad wanted me to hear it. Around the time of it finally stopping, I got mad because i was hearing it again (I'm unsure if it was due to me hearing shit or they actually were) but it caused me to take my bedding and go downstairs to sleep. In the morning, I was rudely awoken to my stepdad slamming the door open and storming past. He's not usually like that when people are sleeping, so it instantly gave me the impression that he was pissed off and the only reason I can think of is that he was angry I wasn't there to listen.
•He used to tease me for my paranoia to. As a way to discourage them from getting intimate, I would leave my door open at night. This happened around this year, but I was doing that again and I messaged my stepdad if they were actually going to sleep. It then somehow turned to him making a dig about how he knew I gets anxious at night and when I asked why he sent me "In case me and your mam have sex. 😜" Before, I tried to resolve this issue by begging them to just tell me if they were gonna have sex or not so I could sleep downstairs (because I was gonna find out the hard way anyways.) And they kept on refusing? Which just gave me the impression that they wanted me to listen more.
•Around 11 again, he would often tell me details about his and my mums sex life. Like how he was always good at pulling out and the only time he would wear a condom is right when he was about to finish. But the reason why my sister came to be was because he just failed to pull out that one time and my mum refused to get an abortion. Another time, he went on about how him and my mother had sex during her period and how they had to use towels and they didn't enjoy it because it was too messy.
•I don't know if he did things before the age of 11, my memories are very faded and it's like there are major gaps throughout everything. I'm worried that he did, however. When I was very young, I remember having no accidents at all during the night. But then, around the ages of 9, I would have an accident basically every night and would get a lot of water infections. I know that's a classic sign of child sexual abuse, but I don't want to jump to conclusions or anything.
•Another reason as to why I believe more things had happened to me than what I know of is because I always seemed to know what sex was when I was young, but I wouldn't know the name or anything specific about it like how to get pregnant or what cum was. Though, even though I didn't know what it was, it was like I always thought about it, I could never not think about sex, it was disgusting. This stayed until I was around 13. I remember where I even asked my 'boyfriend' at the time, we were both around 8, if he wanted to have sex, and I have no idea why.
•Over the years, he would flash me frequently. Everytime, I would always believe it was an accident because he'd never acknowledge it, besides from that one time which he always jokes about it and blames me. Everytime he would flash me, it would either be because of a convenient hole in the crotch of his pants or because he was wearing very lose fit shorts and it would just be hanging out. The more I think about it, I'm very sure he would have been able to feel such a thing, especially when it was poking out of the hole, but it was like he was just oblivious.
•For some strange reason, when I was younger, I would make comments about small dicks. I don't know if I was commenting on his dick specifically, but he would always say the same thing. "Width matters more than length."
•Recently, around 16-17, he made a joke about how he listens to me masturbating. Once he noticed how shocked I looked, he then went on saying about how my vibrator is too quiet to hear.
•Around 17 again, I went to use the shower. The shower I use is the one that's connected to my parents room. When I locked the door, he got madish and started making comments about it. I had to defend myself, saying how 'the door would open on it's own if I didn't lock it'. Eventually, he backed off.
•I don't understand the point in the fucking door and lock to my bedroom anymore. Whenever I decided to lock my door, my parents start shouting at me through the walls, asking why I locked my door. My stepdad barely knocks, it's like a tap and he doesn't even wait sometimes. I remember seeing a past message from an old friend saying how he tried to walk in when I was changing and that he knew I was changing. I didn't explain myself, I really wish I did because I don't remember this.
•(Around 17.) We were messaging eachother and it somehow turned in to him hinting if I saw this one animated video, it was a porn one. I said no, and to that he sent me a screenshot of it. It wasn't anything bad or anything, just the start of it and nothing was revealing, he then asked if I was sure. And how he was surprised that I hadn't.
•(Around 17.) I don't really get my period, we still don't know why. But as I was getting a lot of blood tests, my stepdad was trying to check things off the list of what it could be. One of those being that my opening is just extremely tight I guess, because he asked if I ever tried penetrating myself. I admitted that I did, but I couldn't get it to exactly go in. Which he then decided to make a comment saying how It's just my 'technique'. I wonder if the only reason he asked that was to see if I ever tried anything out of morbid curiosity.
•(Around 17 again.) He randomly bought me dildo's once, I didn't ask him for them, he just bought them for me and it was wildly uncomfortable. Once he gave me them, he asked if I wanted him to show me how to use them. I said no, which he then said something about how if I ever did then I could ask him. I worry what would have happened if I did say yes.
•When I was around 14, I went glamping. I ended up having to share a bed with him. One of the nights, I woke up to his hand just on top my crotch. I tried grabbing it and moving it away but it just fell back down on to it. I don't know if he put it back there on purpose. I still question if it was a dream, I'm very sure it wasn't because I remember going back to sleep, but it still just bugs me.
•Around 17, I was upset for some reason and he was comforting me. During this, he randomly grabbed the inside of my thigh. I usually just wear a shirt and boxers, so he basically just grabbed my naked thigh but I don't know if he was doing it in a comforting way.
•Usually when I draw, I have my knees up to my chest so it's easier to use my tablet. Considering what I wear for pyjamas, I can always see him looking at my crotch when he comes in to my room. If he really can see everything I don't understand why he doesn't just tell me to put my legs down.
•He's made a lot of uncomfortable jokes over the years too. One of the ones that upsets me sometimes is that, when he was measuring me for a binder, I was constantly moving around because it was uncomfortable since I was just in a sports bra. As he was leaving, I think I told him about how it was uncomfortable for me or something along those lines. He then turned around and shouted "oh come on, it's not like i was fingerings your pussy or anything."
•Very recently, I asked him if I looked okay before going to college. After a bit of back and fourth he said "I wouldn't kick you out of bed, maybe you could find someone in college who would do the same."
•Other times when I asked him if I looked okay, he'd go on tangents about how my ass is great or how he would date me or be too nervous to talk to me if he was my age.
•One of the more recent jokes was when I dropped a mayonnaise lid on my lap. Nothing got on me, but my stepdad turned to me then turned to my mum and shouted "if anyone starts accusing us, just tell them it was mayonnaise!" Or something like that.
•I remember after we watched the new mean girls film, he started going on saying about how he wanted to rewatch it for the Halloween seen (if you know you know) for the 'panty action'. Which rubs me the wrong way because I'm very sure the girls are supposed to be around my age.
•I'm very sure he also made this fake account, pretending to be one of my old groomers that I tried to cut off, just to message me about nsfw topics and ask for pics. It's a whole long yap about paranoia and just suspicions so I won't get into it though. If I tried to provide all the evidence I have, it'll take forever and there's no point.
There's definitely way more things that he's said, joked and done. But I'm only now beginning to realise that they're not okay. Even when I was younger, I was sort of uncomfortable around the jokes so I would just zone out, leading me to not remembering them now.
I probably will never accept that what happened to me was bad, or a big issue. Especially due to the 'lovely' people on here. Thank you for telling me immediately that I was a liar before you even knew what happened, that I shouldn't blame an 'innocent man', that you hope he comes in and rapes me to the point I split open and bleed. Thank you for telling me that my parents were just trying to promote a sex positive household, that some of the things were questionable at most. Thank you so much for saying I deserved it because I didn't send you pictures. You all made me feel like shit and I'm probably never going to tell people in person what happened to me, out of fear I would be ridiculed due to how much of a baby I'm being. I wasn't raped, so I have no place to cry or even think about it. I'm being overdramatic.
If you even read to this point, you're an angel.

The Context:

Silent Hill 2 is a 2001 psychological horror video game from Konami. A trailer was recently revealed for a remake of the game, with updated graphics and gameplay.
Angela Orosco is a character in Silent Hill 2. She is 19 years old, suicidal, and implied to be the victim of sexual assault by her father.
With the release of the trailer for the remake, some have noted changes to character designs and models — specially Angela’s.
Our drama begins when a user posts a screenshot of a reply to a tweet. The original tweet includes Angela’s redesigned model and a “non-woke” edited version. The reply tweet points out that the character is a 19 year-old sexual abuse victim.
Our drama spans over two threads as the new trailer and changes have sparked debate in the sub.

The Drama, Pt. 1

One user objects that the character isn’t real:

She's not real

so ?

So that's not a picture of a 19 year old abuse victim. The outrage isn't based on reality

it IS the picture of a 19 year old abuse victim FROM silent hill, just because she isn’t real doesn’t mean she doesn’t signify or carry a message from the real world

Silent Hill isn't real. The events in Silent Hill 2 never happened

[Continued:]

u really are close minded.. sexual abuse and people dying from diseases, depression, etc does happen irl

I never said that doesn't happen in real life. I said angela sn't real, silent Hill isn't real, and all the events that take place in silent hill 2 are a work of fiction, it's made up, it never happened.

Sure, but that's no reason to justify people reacting like they are. One cannot argue 'None of it's real' while also arguing 'these characters are important to me' or 'I want to invest in this series/game' because the point of the game is for you to immerse and invest in it. You're meant to care about the characters intrinsically, and not about 'what they do for you'. It's absolutely fine to be upset if some 15 year old idiot 'consoomer' whose first thought when he becomes upset about how a female in the game looks responds with "You want my money~! I am your demographic!" makes such an ignorant, room-temperature IQ take like this, and it's fine to let them know why.

I didn't say these characters are important to me. Real people who exist are important to me. People who get emotional about other people having opinions on made up characters must have some deeper issues. This is a subreddit for discussing a video game series, it's not Doctor Phil.

You don't seem to understand the concept of context very well

[Continued:]

The context is that you and some others don't like anything I've said because it hurt your feelings. I understand the context that you are implying, but I want you to find a way to say it before I go on

[…]

It's story telling, dude.

I say this with relief, but most people have not expirienced sexual abuse. Obviously, this is a good thing. However, it's pretty clear these days that empathy for people who have isn't wide-spread. The point of storytelling is broadening horizons, through different perspectives. It should not just be about catering to the audience.

Storytelling is that means of spreading empathy. There is value to the experience it has to share, and regardless of if Angela is real, the experiences she's there to portray are not without inspiration sourced in reality. If your argument is "She's not real. It's not real. Why care?" then you don't get the point of the whole of storytelling. Not just games, like, all of storytelling.

I just want to draw you attention to the OP's post, the original commenter in the image said nothing about SA, it's not mentioned instead the OP brings it up as a shield to prevent any criticism of the characters redesign. That's manipulation, and only an idiot wouldn't see it.

But what about word choice?

Calling someone a “fucking worm” is just as childish as the post they’re criticizing

if someone doesn't want to be called a worm they shouldn't act like a worm. even the engagement bait excuse doesn't work, it's gross behavior.

I would never call someone a disgusting worm but that’s just me 👌

lol ok snowflake
Boo hoo
it's very noble of you to come to the defense of some insane misogynist on twitter

No calling someone a worm is objectively hilarious tbh

”Vulnerable beauty”:

She was still the poster girl for the original SH2. Yes she was a sexual abuse victim but there was a certain vulnerable beauty to her that Team Silent/Konami wanted to convey in that iconic knife closeup shot as well as using her face for the actual cover art of the game.

"abuse victim"
"certain vulnerable beauty"
You actually wrote those two things together mate. Get therapy.

a lot of people who apparently have played and think they like silent hill 2 completely lack the maturity to handle any of the themes of the game apparently. angela's attractiveness should not be part of the discourse around her character at all.

A base level of attractiveness is relevant for almost all characters except Eddie. Thats the uncomfortable truth of human nature.
Attractiveness enhances a character’s charm. It enhances melancholic and profound musical performances, it enhances melancholic and profound movies. See Mazzy Star. See 500 Days of Summer. It wouldn’t have been the same if those musical artists and actors had unappealing annoying faces.

just because you are too shallow to empathize with people you don’t find attractive doesn’t mean everyone’s brain is broken in the same way man.

[Continued:]

This isn’t about me. This is about human nature. Look at the top YouTube comments on a Mazzy Star performance. They are praising her visual beauty. And we all know it feeds into the tenderness of the song. Nobody goes “Wtf is wrong with you- her face has nothing to do with the artistic value of the song!!!” You might call it shallow but it’s nothing to be faulted for. We are human.
Angela’s story is melancholic and profound. But Konami wouldn’t have made her the cover art had she been morbidly obese with a pudgy unappealing face. Nor would we SH2 fans hang the game poster of her on our walls if she was morbidly obese with a pudgy unappealing face. That knife pose shot wouldn’t have been nearly as iconic.
Saying all this stuff is very not PC. But there’s a difference between being bothered by the truth and refusing to accept it as the truth.

[…]

You misunderstand the term “vulnerable beauty”. You’re thinking about it negatively in terms of being taken advantage of. It’s not that. Im talking about tenderness and sorrow that is enhanced by natural beauty- and vice versa.
Go on YouTube and look at all the musical performances of songs about melancholy/ vulnerability/tenderness played by legendary artists. Like “fade into you” by Mazzy Star. The top YouTube comments are full of praises on her natural beauty. We know that aesthetic beauty enhances the artistry and vice versa.
Human nature tends to gravitate toward certain types of faces. It wouldn’t be the same if she had a derpy face. There is a reason why Konami decided to use Angela’s face as the cover art for the original SH2 game. Because her vulnerable beauty is a key component of her character. And her character is a key component of the game.
Even for James. The artistic value would be diminished if James had an ugly douchey and generally unlikeable face.

The Drama, Pt. 2

In a second thread, it is confirmed that this is the character’s final design.
DEI is blamed:

i vision apparently given by a DEI consultancy group named Hit Detection.

Holy shit you people treat DEI like it’s the fucking boogeyman. You realize that most games hire DEI consultancy, and they’re not some evil org pulling the strings changing the game, they almost always just check the game to ensure there isn’t any content that will unintentionally offend people?
It’s not some crazy scheme, it’s literally just checking that the writing has the intended response. It’s proofreading.

Because it is. Go actually read the ideology they are based of. DEI is the new fascism

Jesus, you have no idea what fascism means.
Just use pornhub man, this isn't something to go to war for lmao
You know, I was gonna debate you and use logic and sense, but the moment you threw out “facism” because it’s the buzzword of the day, I knew I’d be trying to debate someone with the IQ of a single cell amoeba

Insult to the single-cell amoebas tbh
Sure. Insult the person and not the argument.
Just so you know, I read most of post modernism general theories. It is amazing how it resembles fascism but just much better worded.
So, if you feel so insulted maybe go actually read the texts about DEI,instead of going hating on people.

[Continued:]

They insulted your argument too though. It's just the same basic rhetoric that everyone who thinks this way speaks. It's like you all subscribe to the same newsletter and read the weekly approved script. It's tiring and a waste of everyone's time, including yours.

Dudes never had an original thought in his life, if he didn't just parrot what the other incels say he wouldn't speak at all and the world would be all the better for it.

[…]

Or you could stop being incel
You didn't make an argumeny. You basically said "DEI is fascist go look it up". I looked it up ages ago when all these gamer dudes started scaremongering and it was the biggest non-issue I've ever seen. Like the whole SBI thing that got debunked fucking instantly. Outrage youtubers just found their new target to farm clicks, that's all.
User from kotakuinaction probably gonna link Jordan Petterson video if you ask for links

[…]

Just say the n word, man. We all know what you mean
Yup. People can stick their heads in the dirt and pretend these firms don't affect character designs but it is what it is.
Oh boy. Fuck DEI. Those people came to ruin games. The same way they ruined the other media.

There are allegations of gaslighting:

I cant with so many people gaslighting themselves into liking this design, OR the horrendous voice acting. So many of you guys are in pure copium mode right now, Just like with the trainwreck that is SH short message. This game looks worse and worse every time they show more of it, and everyone sticking up for the hideous character design and pretending the game looks good only because some of you compare it to the miniscule ps2 era gameplay of the OG isn't going to change how crap this remake's vision is. As someone who encourages people to take risks when it comes to remakes and reboots, I will be open minded. But it’s not looking good.

This sub is deleting any comments or posts that even slightly suggest there is something weird with how she looks. Her face does not look like a normal 19 year old girls and if you think it does your on some of that high dose copium.

People on the sub won't take any form of criticism, they'll just downvote you to doom. Her face is rather uncanny imo. I feel like they could've done it better

I don't mind being down voted. I've expressed my opinion and anyone who disagrees is welcome to express theres. What I do find amusing is the "you're just an incel" cope. These are supposed to be people against sexualization but make fun of other people's sex lives. But this is Reddit, so I'm not expecting anything better.

Comparisons are made:

I agree. If they feel inspired by Quagmire from Family Guy, then they should stick to their vision.

Bait used to be believable

I swear Silent Hill “fans” have to be the most obnoxious, I kinda see why we got nothing for such a long time.

Make Genshin fans look almost sane.

Denial used to be believable. Hit Detection worked on this game and that explains a lot.

”Hideous”:

She looks hideous. Can't believe this is what Blooper is doing.

Trust me brother you absolutely look worse than her

Yet you don't know what he or she looks like.
Stand on business and post yourself then lil bro
Sad to see people lack the critical thinking to critique this game. Blooper gave this woman a man jaw and it looks downright ugly. How does a character model from 2001 look better than one from 2024? Goes to show how much team silent cared about their game while blooper is just trying to make a quick buck.

The Flairs:

• “the trend of uglyfying formerly ok looking characters just for the progressive checkmark”
  
• “you’re all shit with your toxic positivity”
  
• “if a female doesn't give them a boner then it's woke”
  
• “theyre mad cuz they cant nut to a trauma victim”
  

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Hey, I wanted to connect with people who are actively working with crypto brokerage firms as an affiliates and making money on CPA model. How's the ads are performing on your end? what's the CR you are getting?

I'm currently supervising a Behavior Tech who refuses to accept Feedback. I have been supervising a newly hired Behavior Tech who seemed like a great candidate on paper, lots of training and is currently getting their Masters Degree in Psychology and wants all the hours they can get.
However, we started with one case and after 3 days in the family no longer wanted services. Without going in to all the specifics, the family decided not to continue. The family was somewhat reluctant based on past negative experiences so they knew from the beginning they just might not be ready. The BT was irate about no longer getting hours, saying that he felt he should have been a part if the discussion with the family because it's disrespectful to cut his hours- red flag number 1.
To make up some hours, I offered to do some 1:1 training with him so he could at least get paid for that while waiting for the next case. We did over 6 hours of training on Pairing, Data Collection and how to respond to challenging behaviors.
I went to their 2nd assigned case to observe them pairing. It did NOT go well. The BT basically just sat the client, not doing anything. I prompted them to interact, they just sat there on the couch until the mom introduced thr iPad trying to get some interaction going. The client then began shoving and pulling the Tech's arm which is a precursor to biting. Despite being prompted to follow the training protocol the Tech just sat there. I finally just took over the session and modeled programs while the tech watched.
I did a follow-up with the tech to review the session, trying to get him to reflect on some ways to improve. The tech was adamant that he handled the session "perfectly." I used several examples of where we could have tried something different, asked him to identify the precursor behaviors, techniques for pairing-nothing.
So after, I informed them they would remain pairing, not running treatment protocols and would just be assigned to one case for now with close supervision he became irate, demanding to talk to my supervisor (who's already aware and agrees with my assessment), is demanding more hours etc. I also need to note that he has poor boundaries (ie., sending repeated "non-emergency) text messages after hours, demanding a reply to texts even after I inform them that I have left for the day and will get back to them tomorrow etc.)
I don't know what else I can do in terms of training, supervision, modeling etc. He just isn't willing to accept Feedback. Every time something is identified as improving, he disagrees, tries to insist that he did it the way he was supposed to.
Is there anything you've experienced that has worked to get a supervisee to accept Feedback? Any suggestions welcome!!(PLEASE 🤔)

Let me start off by saying I had followed her for years. Back when she was making her little videos that would only get 100 or 200 likes. I was like, wow she seems genuinely nice. Boy, that didn’t last long. Whether you are a Christian or not, it’s important that you know she’s a pastor’s wife, and her whole mission from the beginning was to be a “genuine and authentic christian influencer” since they “don’t exist anymore”. Flash forward a few months, the changes slowly started happening. The videos were getting more likes, the influencer accent was adapted, then the nail tapping and the quirky little smiling at the beginning of videos.
Now, it is her life; But the ONLY reason she became so famous was the desperate young christian women who needed a role model, (who she promised to be) the ones she’s completely forgotten about while she’s living her high-rise lifestyle. Put aside her doing every brand deal under the sun and becoming insanely un-relatable, what really irks me is the hypocrisy.
(Ik y’all don’t want discussion on church but I thought it would be best to mention all of this to give some context especially of her origin)
I think she has went against her old “core values”, I think she’s fake, I think she’s a hypocrite, and I think she just wants to play a pastors wife v.s being one. I remember all of the women in her comment section thanking her for not being so out of touch, flash forwarded today and she’s so far gone it’s crazy. Like her buying a brand new Mom car that she completely trashed right after getting it, when she just got a brand new car when they moved- I can’t. And randomly spending anywhere from $400 to $600 a week at grocery stores for a “small haul”. An assistant? A stylist? 💀
Now maybe you don’t agree with that and that’s fine, but my final straw (that ended up getting me blocked) was this-
A sick Child. What do you do when your child is sick? You comfort them right? Clean up the mess? Not Miss Cecily, why would she do that when it’s peak time for content. Better to just run into the bathroom with your phone and set it up and scream across the house and ask “is Jackson still throwing up”. Then rubbing your eyes like this has been so difficult for you (bless her heart).
(Video has since been deleted, I believe she took it down the same time that she took the GRWM to go to my grandmas funeral down. She did a full post and comment sweep)
Or my fave, what got me blocked
“Oh my Gosh you guys, Sam hung this picture up of me on our wall from a magazine I was “randomly” in” Girl, give us peasants some credit. You weren’t randomly in anything 💀 not only that but then she goes and shoves the camera in Sam’s face while he’s doing dishes and is like “SHAMMMM AWWWWW SHAMMMM” girl. How tiring it must be to not have one genuine moment to yourself that you don’t think to pull out a camera and post it on the Internet.
I had unfollowed her at this point , but thanks for the TikTok algorithm she was still all over my feed. Thankfully she blocked me after several hundred thousand people in her comment section were agreeing with me that she needs to keep some of these moments to herself.
I really just can’t stand her 😭 thanks for your time, hope you enjoyed the story ❤️

First of all, I got to mention that you got the following skills yourself alone to turn rubbish into treasure:

• triple-A level skills in programming
• triple-A level skills in making animations
• the ability to model as you please and know how like it's the back of your hand
• have UX/UI experience

So here's the question for all. If you were the dev in place of Jao, what would you do to make the game a success, and what features would you have in the game as well as dragons?

Hi all,
I am just beginning my power bi journey. I am an above average excel user, and have some Python/pandas experience. I am also decent with power automate.
I work at a small private credit company, and handle the asset management function. I have maybe 150 loans in my portfolio, so you understand how small we are. I cannot justify the cost of a true data analyst right now, so it’s up to me to learn and implement solutions.
We are on 365 enterprise.
Right now our loan management system is a large excel workbook. Arcaic, but I have it on the 2 year development plan to have it rebuilt into a true software platform.
In the mean time, I am learning power query and power in order to connect all my data together (10+ different sources of data) and to model and visualize our data for decision making and risk management.
As I’m learning more and more, I would love to find a way to get the data refreshed daily into a true database. The actual updates would still be done in the excel workbook for now. We have an Amazon RDS that our client portal is using, which is ideally what it would update to. I’m also not opposed to using one of the azure solutions.
Does anyone have suggestions on how to implement daily excel refreshes into either RDS or azure SQL? It will also need some hefty data transformations and cleansing in the flow, which I’m currently doing in power query when it goes into power bi

Hi everyone!!!
My wife and I currently have a side hustle of helping people learn the ropes of award travel and how to rack up and redeem lots of points/miles.
We currently take 3-4 international trips per year with essentially free biz class airfare and top-end lodging.
Thus, were obsessed with traveling the world for the minimum price possible.
Upon the reqeuest of colleagues, clients and mentors, we’ve decided to also adapt to becoming travel agents.
Since our points/miles gig isn’t outsource-able/delegate-able in any way, we need a business model that we can scale long term. Our goal is to work for ourselves full-time as entrepreneurs in the next year.
Ideally we’d work with high-end clients and potentially businesses. That way we can use our expertise as much as possible.
We’d greatly, indescribably appreciate any advice you might have on starting a travel agency (ours would be an add-on to our current travel service business, so the basics of starting a LLC biz are in place).
Tips like where to start; books to read; guides; credentials; where you go to make connections; etc. would be wonderful! We’re open to anything!
Any help you can provide will be appreciated so much!!! 🫶

Hey all!
Fairly Seasoned GM (across a wide range of systems both light and crunchy) with fairly seasoned players (mainly various DnD3.5/4/5).
Our main group is currently transitioning to 2e after running a couple of the Free one shots and currently working through the beginners box.
Being fairly seasoned players they’re already exploring the edges of the system. We’ve run a few Avoid Notice scenarios now and found the RAW no stealth roll til an encounter and then stealth initiative vs. passive perception. And we’ve found it a little clumsy compared to how nicely the other exploration activities have been going. Some reading on the topic suggests this isn’t a unique experience.
It’s worth noting here that both I and the players enjoy the mechanical density and structure of the game, and are also very narratively and character driven and enjoy failure, we’re not war gamers and we’re not rules-light RPers.
What we’re really loving at the moment is how well 2e’s rules enable interesting role play and bring structure to it in an interesting way.
In particular the table is really avoiding hidden rolls, I even quickly modelled and 3d printed a small dice tower so players can roll their own but only I can see the result. Using it for Recall Knowledge and Grappling Hooks in the beginners box dungeon has been a hit.
Also in both DnD and other systems I’ve always a big proponent of smoother transitions into (and out of) encounters and exploration. I don’t like a clean break from roll play/narrative land into combat encounter land, and try to keep narrative and dramatic tension through encounters. I feel like 2e has really enabled and elevated that one almost every from but this one. My least favourite thing is encounter as a failure state with combat assumed from the outset.
We’re trying to stick to RAW as much as we can before breaking things or reinventing the wheel so I’m here to ask for opinions on potential pitfalls. But this mechanic is cropping up fairly frequently and I trust from reading other people’s qualms that this isn’t just a new-to-the-system issue.
As such I’m considering the following approach to Avoid Notice, trying to keep as true to possible with RAW/RAI but trying to bring the dramatic tension and “rules cinematicness” as I’ve been calling it to the table, and looking for opinions/advice/pitfalls we may not see because of our inexperience with the system.
Worth mentioning this isn’t a recommendation for every table. It’s a little dense but should be intuitive after running it a couple times. I trust it’s within the capacity of our group. Certainly won’t be everyone’s cup of tea.

• Characters Avoid Notice
• Everyone Rolls a Hidden Stealth Check
• I note the results
• I begin narrating the sneaking and the characters are free to continue reacting/taking other actions while avoiding notice
• Should a potential encounter arise I compare their rolls to the passive perception of the potential adversaries/noticers
• If they succeed I make the executive decision whether it is more interesting to enter encounter mode or narrate the close encounter.
• If we enter encounter mode, I make it clear to the players that they still have not been noticed but we are entering initiative order using their stealth rolls (they still do not know the order) at this point I roll perception initiative for the other NPCs/creatures per usual. These are also hidden.
• The encounter begins. Each participant (player or GM pawns) has their turns announced immediately after the turn prior ends. Each player remains Unnoticed to any npc/creature they beat the passive of, and remain so so long as they don’t deliberately reveal themselves, they do not have to roll for sneak/hide these unless they become noticed.
• GM pawns who have not noticed any players continue acting as they otherwise would, doing nothing to break a character’s concealment (but able to do other things like recall knowledge, ready, seek, aid, etc.). GM pawns who have noticed players are free to act however makes sense, intelligent creatures who are unequipped may attempt to subtlety equip themselves before revealing to the players that they have been noticed using stealth/thievery or subtly seek to try to spot any characters they may have missed, an unintelligent creature might just attack as soon as its turn is reached (or even as soon as a reaction might be triggered).

Optional additions: - any player who critically failed Vs a gm-pawn Perception DC might spectacularly fail revealing themselves on their first action, losing their first action. - players using Follow the Expert may only take stealth and hide actions otherwise they must begin rolling sneak/hide with their own modifiers per usual. - the first turn after a GM pawn whose Notice was Avoided detects any player they lose an action.
Perks: - fully stealth turn based encounters getting some mileage out of non-combat encounter mechanics mechanics and avoiding the “everything ends in combat” encounter mode. - tasty dramatic tension with the turn reveals and starting an encounter uncertain if you’ve been spotted and creatures taking turns while players are concealed plus the potential for counter-sneaking NPCs - reward players who role high stealth (they remain undetected even while other players may become detected, even if they use their whole first turn before they know someone has been spotted they start their next turn still undetected. - giving the “surprise round” style mechanic a lot of players appreciate and expect form systems as enemies remain off-guard to undetected players - makes the transition into encounter more dramatically/narratively satisfying - Mostly preserves the design ethos (I think) with all checks vs. DCs and hidden stealth roles. - No awkward everyone rolling their initiative but maybe not needing it vs perception DCs then rolling perception for initiative for creature. All of it is hidden from the player and they get a more or less seemless narrative transition staying in the land of uncertainty and tension until the moment combat breaks (if it does)
Cons: - Complicated. I reckon the current group will get it after a single encounter but it’s going to need onboarding if we bring in other players, especially ones with less experience - Will really weigh favour to PCs based on their (very buffable) Avoid Notice rolls. And if they adapt to the system and game it by playing over-cautious and readying actions vs off-guard enemies it could unbalance things. Could be offset with some kind of extra complication like each turn subtracting 1 or 2 from their stealth roll so they’re pressured to get out of the encounter quickly and not be over-cautious. but that’s another layer of complexity.
That’s only 2 cons, and only one of them is a potential dealbreaker for us, but I don’t know what else I might be missing. I’m not too averse to even heavily skewing a combat in the party’s favour (especially as bypassing encounters entirely grants the experience anyway). And if it starts to get gamed I can adapt.
I like that it eases the transition from exploration to stealth encounters without breaking flow to roll initiative and that choices and narrative moments about trying to steal something or gain an advantage can happen in encounter, making the encounter a progressive narrative device rather than a failure state.
I also know that a huge part of the reason the rules as written has been unsatisfying is because the rest of the rules (for which other systems don’t codify) have been so refreshingly satisfying and it feels like an awkward fad for a common (for our group) mechanic. And that 5e stealth rules are just as bad if not worse and have also never been satisfying, but it’s the least of our worries over there.
We’re going to test it next session regardless. But just wanted to field it here for thoughts.

Basically as the title says, what is a tool you or your org would subscribe or buy that doesn't exist on the market, but would help you massively on productivity or product delivery?
​
To start it, we've been on the hunt lately for a simple Service Catalog and Portfolio with approval management software that allows our tenants Self Service on our infrastructure (which is built on top of a multi-tenant strategy). Most of our configuration management is done over Ansible/AWX, hence using a native RedHat solution would make sense.
Initially we explored Backstage and Port.io, but it meant we had to do a lot of integration to make it work, so we started investigating solutions that used Ansible as a
After initial investigation, I came across this Red Hat Ansible Automation feature, called Ansible Services Catalog:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ryNEJuyvEl0
This module would pretty much fit all our needs and would justify migration to the commercial Ansible Automation Platform, but unfortunately it got moved out of the product to let ServiceNow handle the Self Service:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmPXiRHjgRY&t=866s
Some ~ good news was that an open-source upstream project was started to maintain this module, called Pinakes, but the bad news is that the last commit dates 2 years ago:
https://github.com/ansible/pinakes
We came across a new open-source project called Squest (backed by HP):
https://github.com/HewlettPackard/squest
After trying it out, the whole product looked a bit cumbersome and it does not support a multi-tenant model, so the proposal to integrate Squest got thrown out of the window.
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So we started looking for ways to build our own service catalog. We designed how the back-end and the concept would work, what we needed was how to build the front-end. As a pure cloud/devops team with extensive system engineering and back-end expertise, front-end is the only skill we're missing.
We looked at some frameworks, Patternfly used by RedHat to name a few (https://www.patternfly.org/), but we just couldn't go down the rabbit hole to start maintaining yet another in-house project which nobody had a clue how to build.
Turns out frameworks like Streamlit or NiceGUI are too good until they are not, so this whole project to introduce the Service Catalog got paused for now.
We would definitely need a way to easily build front-ends without going the extensive *.js route, or a product that fulfills most of our requirements.
What is a similar story you've had on your shop?