I was suggested this subreddit by a friend so I’m not entirely sure if it fits my problem, but I’m willing to try.
Six months ago I started therapy because I realized I fail to connect my mind and personality with the person I see in the mirror. For years I’ve been indulging in different forms of escapism to completely obliterate any emotional pain, which resulted in losing contact with myself. I told my therapist I didn’t know who I was anymore. Since our first session then she’s made a ton of effort to help me regain self-consciousness, and I finally started to associate my appearance with “me”, but recently I’ve discovered that the only emotion my whole existence evokes in me is disgust. I can only see myself as some sort of gross decaying animal body, and I get confused and anxious when I remember this is what my loved ones see and are forced to interact with. Therefore, I am disgusted with every relationship I have formed previously and wish to cut myself out of all of them.
My therapist suggests that all the “disgust” I feel might actually be internalized shame, and though her claim does sound legitimate, there is little evidence to back it up and hypothesize about the reason said shame emerged. The memories I have of my childhood are extremely limited, and the hazy parts I can recall I can explicitly view as a spectator, with no thoughts or emotions present. I do know that my mother was a cold woman when I was a kid from the words of my relatives but she says she’s changed her attitude pretty fast, caring for me and praising me for my achievements. I don’t know whether I can believe what she says since I have no concrete memory of either situation. I briefly remember crying hysterically one day in my room so she could clearly hear me and come comfort me; if I’m not mistaken, it took her an hour or so. I think she scolded me often for being unclean and disobeying and unsympathetic, having not cared when I upset my family members, but I’m not sure if I can trust this memory. She says when I was bullied at school, was injured or had my first period, I never told her (and I don’t even remember being bullied). It had also never occurred to me to talk to her about my personal feelings and struggles. It’s not that I wanted her to know and stopped myself from telling, but as if I never thought that was an option at all. I love my mother and I believe she was always trying her best parenting, and the fact that I doubt her and feel disconnected from her as if she was a stranger pains me. Could it be that her actions have caused my shame?

For context, I have ADHD & Autism, and will mostly speak from that perspective. This was originally written for a different sub, but after posting, I quickly realised that it could perfect for this community as well. So, although this post will mainly speak from a neurodivergent perspective, I'd love to hear from everyone who struggle with self-limiting beliefs from all walks of life, as this is a fundamental part of the human experience that, I imagine, many in this community strive to overcome.
Neurodivergents & neurotypicals alike suffer from self-limiting narratives.
The power of belief is strong -- If we believe we can't do something, that will often be the deciding factor on whether that thing is done. We are the stories we tell ourselves.
For neurodivergent people, these challenges are tenfold, as there are significantly greater, all too real, challenges that we have to fight through, and these can reinforce the self-limiting beliefs we hold. Especially in the age of social media, where self-limiting beliefs of others are all too often stated as unquestionable fact, and thus, can become more easily ingrained.
It was one of the few benefits of growing up before the larger awareness of ADHD & Autism. Don't get me wrong, the downsides were tremendous, but not having a million voices whispering in my ear that I couldn't do something helped to ingrain a mindset of perceived limits as obstacles to overcome. That my symptoms could be improved. That I could learn social skills, time management & how to organise things, even if the barriers were higher for me than others.
I didn't start that way, however. Even without social media constantly reinforcing my self-doubt, I still had overcome a great many barriers. And the first opponent I needed to beat was the jailer inside my brain. That voice telling me that I couldn't do things because I was autistic. That things were hopeless.
It was a long, hard-fought battle.
With every victory, however, that voice inside me grew a little quieter. As I made friends, performed in plays & films, told stories, had sex, developed meaningful relationships, both romantic & platonic. As my empathy grew, and my ability to read & understand people blossomed beyond even a lot of neurotypicals, the voice in my head that told me I was beyond these things slowly sewed its mouth shut.
Was it easy? Fuck no, I'm racked with trauma that I'm still sorting out. I hope that, as we continue to progress a society, we can continue to create pathways that allow neurodivergent people to grow & thrive without the constant fear & imposter syndrome that I had to endure to become the person I am now. Don't get me wrong, I love who I am now, but I had to endure a lot to get there. A lot that could have been mitigated with the right support. That's not to say that I had zero support, but so often, the "comfort" people would provide would often come in the form of a well-meaning, but damaging: "Have you thought about giving up?"
I do truly believe it is beneficial for us neurodivergent folks to challenge ourselves, and to push the limits of what we believe to be possible. And we should be encouraged to challenge ourselves. Support needs to be that right blend. Not enabling the defeatist attitudes that will ultimately sabotage us, but not being abusive in how hard we're pushed either.
Neither approach will result in a desirable outcome, and it is only by gently, but firmly pushing someone's challenge line, that we can see real progress.
I had to self-motivate for most of my life, and it was exhausting. Rewarding ultimately, but tiring.
I hope in the future, we can strike that balance & give future neurodivergents the structure they need to push themselves in healthy ways, and go beyond what they ever thought they were capable of.
So, what self-limiting beliefs have you overcome? What narratives did you used to believe? Or others used to tell you, that you were ultimately able to overcome?
Do you feel that you overcame these limits in a healthy way? Or were you forced to wade through the muck to get the other side?

Choosing the right private school for children is one of the most important decisions parents make. This decision not only affects the child's education and social development, but also plays an important role in his future success. Choosing the right private school is very important as it affects many aspects of their life, including the learning environment, the children they study with and their overall development. These schools offer more rigorous curriculum, which helps children achieve better. Let's get ready for college etc. With fewer children in the class, teachers are able to pay attention to each child and teach according to their specific needs. This makes it easier for children to understand difficult things and they enjoy studying.Not only the study of books, but also things like sports, art and social service are given attention. With this, children are able to progress in every field. By participating in various activities, children develop important qualities like leadership, teamwork and proper use of time.

key factors for Choosing the Right Private School

1. Expert Faculty: Most of the teachers teaching in private schools are very good and experienced. They are able to understand children completely and help them progress. The relationship between teachers and students is also good, which creates a good environment for studies.
2. Values and Discipline: In most private schools, emphasis is laid on imparting good values and teaching discipline to children. This gives children a sense of responsibility and they learn to respect elders. Discipline inculcates good habits, self-control and the ability to differentiate between good and bad in children, which is necessary to be successful in life.
3. Safe Environment: Children's safety is of utmost importance to parents and private schools are considered very good in this matter. In these schools, there are strict arrangements for the safety of children and at the same time children are also given an environment that supports each other. In a safe environment, children are able to study and develop without any worries.
4. Good contacts: In private schools, both children and parents get a chance to meet good people. These relationships formed in the school environment benefit children later in life, be it in terms of studies or career. Especially, the network of students who have passed out of school (alumni network) helps children a lot in making a career.
5. Freedom to learn new things: Private schools have the freedom to change their education according to the needs of the changing society with time.

Paschim Vihar – A Hub for Quality Education

Paschim Vihar, an area of West Delhi, has emerged as a major center of good education. This quiet area is known for its clean houses and environment, making it an excellent location for schools.Within a few years, many renowned private schools have opened in Paschim Vihar. Each of these schools focuses on providing rigorous education to the children as well as on their all-round development.

• Safe and supportive environment

Safety is given utmost importance in the schools of Paschim Vihar. These schools follow strict safety rules and keep the school premises safe. Additionally, these schools focus on creating an environment where every child feels welcome and supported. By focusing on children's mental and emotional health, these schools ensure that children excel in studies and are successful in life.

• New thinking in education

Private schools of Paschim Vihar are known for adopting new thinking in the matter of education. These schools constantly update their teaching methods and teach children using modern technology, which increases their learning ability. With so much emphasis on learning new things, these schools ensure that children are fully prepared for the challenges of today's times.

Right Private School in Paschim Vihar: Doon public School

Doon Public School, located in the heart of Paschim Vihar, is a beacon of excellent education and all-round development. With its commitment to nurturing young minds and empowering students for the future, Doon Public School is more than just an educational institution; It is the door to a world of possibilities. Here's why choosing Doon Public School can be the best decision for your child's education journey:

1. Door to the future:At Doon Public School, we believe in preparing students not just for today but also for the challenges and opportunities to come. Our comprehensive curriculum is designed to equip students with the knowledge, skills and mindset they need to succeed in a rapidly changing world. From STEM education to arts and humanities, we provide a well-rounded education that lays a strong foundation for future success.
2. Where everyone can make a difference: At the heart of Doon Public School is a vibrant and inclusive community where every student is valued and empowered to make a difference. Our supportive environment fosters collaboration, creativity and critical thinking, allowing students to explore their passions and reach their full potential. Be it through academic achievements, extra curricular activities or social service, every student of Doon Public School has an opportunity to shine and contribute positively to the society.
3. A world of choices and opportunities: One special thing about Doon Public School is that it provides a lot of choices and opportunities to the students. From specific academic programs to a variety of extra-curricular activities, students have the freedom to pursue their interests and explore new areas. Be it getting involved in robotics, honing musical talent, or participating in sports, Doon Public School provides a supportive platform to students to discover their passion and unleash their potential.
4. We celebrate diversity: At Doon Public School, we celebrate diversity in every form. Our students include individuals from diverse cultural, ethnic and socio-economic backgrounds, creating a rich thread of experiences and perspectives. We believe that diversity enriches the learning environment and promotes greater understanding and appreciation of the world around us. Through inclusive practices and multiculturalism education, we strive to create a school community where everyone feels valued, respected, and empowered to succeed.
5. Find your talent:Doon Public School is not just about academic excellence; It is also about helping students discover and develop their unique talents and abilities. Be it academics, sports, arts or leadership, we provide ample opportunities for students to explore their interests and develop their abilities. Our dedicated faculty and staff guide students on a journey of self-discovery.

Conclusion

In short, Doon Public School in Paschim Vihar offers a broad and enriching educational experience that prepares students for success in a rapidly changing world. With its emphasis on academic excellence, holistic development, diversity, choice and opportunity, Doon Public School is much more than just a school; This is a community where students succeed, grow and make a difference. If you are looking for a school that will empower your child to reach their full potential and live a meaningful life, look no further than Doon Public School.

PART ONE THOUSAND AND THIRTEEN
[Previous Chapter] [The Beginning] [Patreon+2]
Sunday
Lucas tapped the flat of his finger twice on the partially open door, more to let Boyd know he was coming than actually requesting permission to enter. He pushed it open and strode through as the somewhat welcoming grunt came from within.
“Hey, sexy,” he said, crossing the two rooms to zoom in on Boyd sitting at his bench. On the spinner before Boyd was a larger figure than he had ever done before: an eighteen-inch figure of a woman with an hourglass figure wearing a form-fitting formal gown that flowed to the floor, swaying as if she’d just stepped to her right. Her hands were curled as if she were holding something or someone, but that part was missing.
“Ooooh,” Lucas said, resting his head on Boyd’s shoulder to examine the piece closer. “She’s pretty.”
“She’s also the viscount’s granddaughter, who I think is married to a prince somewhere in Eastern Europe. I’d have to pull out her details again, but she’s already got two kids, and she still looks this good.”
“She doesn’t look old enough to have two kids.”
“That’s what happens when you marry when you’re still a teenager.”
“Please tell me it wasn’t an arranged marriage.”
Boyd did a slow pan to level an annoyed look at him.
“What? They used to.”
“Slavery was a thing in America back in the day, too.”
Lucas made a deflating raspberry. “If you want to get technical,” he grumbled.
Boyd twisted his seat to face him, loosely curling his arms around Lucas’ waist. “Where are you off to, Mister Soon-To-Be-Masters?”
Oh-ho. Someone’s feeling playful. “I thought you were going to become a Dobson,” Lucas countered, leaning in to give him a quick morning kiss.
“Yeah, but then I was reminded I do have family that I care about.”
“None of which are Masters. Your mom and Aunt Judy are sisters who changed their names when they married. If you were going to take any of their names, we’d both be changing to Davenport.”
Boyd looked down at where their abdomens rested against each other.
“Hey,” Lucas said, sliding his hand under Boyd’s chin and lifting it so he could see those beautiful baby blues focusing on him. “What’s going on, love?”
Boyd opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. He tried twice more. “Ten years,” he finally croaked. “They took me in and gave me a home within the family for nearly two years, and I repaid them by cutting them out of my life the second I could. Who does that to their own?”
“Somebody with a lot of fear,” Lucas answered honestly. "And that somebody isn’t you anymore. You’ve invited Emily to be our accountant, and personally, I hope you know what you’re doing there…”
“Emily has always been good with money. The only time she’s ever been off is when she borrows money from you, and you go to get it back. By the time she’s finished explaining all the financial movement around the transaction, you end up owing her twice as much, and she’s really convincing. Computerised flow charts and everything.”
Lucas hoped he was exaggerating. If Emily had been that quick and deceptive to separate Boyd from his money when she was a teenager, she might have been even more cunning now. Lucas would remain attentive until she proved herself because the love of his life had earned this break. “Okay,” was all he said since he didn’t want to argue.
Boyd nipped the tip of his nose. “Don’t you ‘okay’ me in that tone of voice.”
Lucas pulled back and rubbed the back of his hand against his nose. It hadn’t hurt, but it was weird. No one had ever done that before. “I’m a cop, love. In my world, it’s guilty until proven innocent.”
“Getting back to my original question. Where are you going?”
“I’m going to go and get some supplies for Levi and Maddy. The dumbass has been worrying himself sick over where he can leave Maddy on short notice if he and Austin get called out to a fire together. They can’t waste up to an hour each way getting over to Queens and Brooklyn.”
“Tell him she can stay with us,” Boyd said without hesitation. I’ll be here all the time, and if I’m out and it’s an emergency dump-and-run, I can drop whatever I’m doing and call someone to teleport me back.”
Lucas leaned in and kissed him again. “And that’s just one of the many reasons I love you,” he said once they parted. “Charlie will be here too, which means Robbie won’t be far away either. Levi still wants to run it past Llyr since it’s his place, but so long as we keep her on our side and away from Miss W, it won’t be a problem.”
“You’ll need to remember to lock up your guns when she’s here.”
Lucas nodded thoughtfully in agreement without speaking. It would devastate everyone if Maddy somehow managed to get her hands on one of his work firearms and fire it. He’d need to get a thumbprint safe – something that he could get at very quickly in a crisis.
“How is she with beds?”
“What?”
“Don’t little kids have those hospital guardrail things, so they don’t roll out of bed and hurt themselves? I mean, your bed isn’t that far from the floor, but if you’re getting supplies, you might want to think about some of those things to keep her in.”
Lucas hadn’t thought about that. “Okay, then it’s going to be a bigger shopping trip than I thought, but that’s alright. Levi and Maddy are going to chill in the apartment until I get back.”
“Do you want me to check in on them?”
“Nah, it should be fine. Levi knows where Charlie’s office is, and if he’s going to annoy anyone while they’re at work, it should be our sister.” Lucas turned Boyd back to his carving and leaned his head on Boyd’s shoulder. “You keep outdoing yourself, you know that, right?”
“These tools are magic. I can’t do a thing wrong with them.” With a slight grimace, he added, “Hey, have you ever heard the story about the kid who gets the magic piano?”
Lucas squinted warily. “Am I going to like this story?”
“It’s a cautionary tale. This kid finds a magic piano, and all he has to do is work the pedals, and the piano plays itself. No one notices it’s not the kid, and the kid’s ego grows with each performance until he’s an international sensation. Then, he has a fight with the piano over who the star really is. The following night, the piano refuses to play, and the kid is booed off the stage. His family is left financially ruined.”
“I will beat you within an inch of your life if you equate that to you.”
Boyd looked at him. “How can I not? I mean, when I relax and just let the tools do what they’re made to do, the pieces come out flawlessly—every time. But the second I worry, minor defects creep in. Nothing I can’t counter and fix, but still…”
“If it concerns you that much, why not do a piece every now and then without the divine tools to prove to yourself that the skill is yours and the tools are just tools?”
Boyd looked over the divine toolset, then back up at the shelf where his older tools were. “That’s a good idea,” he admitted.
Lucas lightly kissed him on the lips and stepped out of his grasp. “I’ve been known to have them now and again. Oh, and don’t forget we’re going to Angus’ this afternoon. Just the six of us.”
Boyd raised his left hand in acknowledgment, but his focus was back on the carving even as his right hand picked up a scalpel of some kind and drove it across the carving’s middle. The blade was then smoothly passed to his left hand to make an incision from that side while his right reached for a new tool.
As he’d said, his motions were flawless, with chips and shavings flying at the speed of a professional wood chopper. Lucas could watch him work all day, but if he was going to make it to Angus’, he needed to leave now.
He let himself out and headed for the main front door to the level.
A little over an hour later, after grabbing several sets of clothes in his brother’s size, Lucas was standing in the middle of the children’s clothing section, blinking in confusion at all the options. He would go to touch one, then back away, unsure.
He must have looked pitiful because a staff member in her mid-thirties took pity on him and approached with a warm smile. “Can I help you?”
“Yeah, this is crazy,” he answered, gesturing to the millions of clothes options before them. “My brother asked me to look after my niece in an emergency, and I want her to have whatever she’ll need at my place in case he doesn’t have time to take her home.” He looked at all the clothes. “Whatever that entails.”
“That’s really sweet. Is your brother a doctor?”
“Fireman.”
The woman gave Lucas the once over. “I can see that.”
Lucas chuckled. It wasn’t anything he hadn’t heard before. Between him, Levi and Mav all sharing their dad’s muscle, they’d always caught people’s eye. “Anyway,” he said, wanting to move this along. “My niece is three going on four, and she’s about this high,” he said, showing her height as an inch or two under his hip.
“Does she have any favourite TV shows?”
“Spongebob,” Lucas said, incredibly grateful for his conversation with Levi over breakfast. He’d have never had that answer otherwise. “And if you’re not doing anything after we get her clothes sorted, my fiancé mentioned something about bed rails since she’ll be sleeping in my old queen-sized bed. This is an all-in shopping trip for her, and I have no idea what to get.”
“Do you have any toys for her? And no, I’m not pushing for a commission here. Little minds need to be kept stimulated, or little hands will end up in places they have no business being. If this is your first time looking after her, you’re going to want a few toys, books, and things to keep her busy.”
“My brother is already nagging me about buying her the basics. What would you recommend that won’t make it seem like I’m trying to buy her affection?”
“Are you okay with electronics, or are you trying to steer her away from that?”
“It doesn’t faze me. It’s more the cost. I don’t want to buy her what my brother hasn’t or can’t afford. I’ve been into too many households where kids have every version of PlayStation, Xbox and Nintendo and every known game that goes with them. Those kids appreciate nothing, and that’s not something I’m okay with.”
“You see a lot of people’s houses?”
“I was a beat cop for over eight years before my promotion.”
“A policeman and a fireman? I’m sure there's a joke involving a bar in there somewhere.”
“If there were, the third person would be an ice hockey player,” Lucas chuckled again, already liking this woman. As they wandered through the aisles, she added things to his cart. Clothes were first, but they quickly moved on to toys. A couple of generic soft toys. and the board game “Candyland”. Lucas grabbed ‘Hungry, Hungry Hippos’, as that was one he and his brothers had played when he’d been Maddy’s age. Then came two large boxes of Duplo.
Not once did it feel like the sales assistant was pushing an agenda. She even paused to consider the options as if she were buying them for her own kids. Lucas really appreciated that.
As they were walking the isles, Lucas came to a screeching halt and stared at a range of doctor, nurse and vet play sets. Two jumped out at him. One had a plastic pet carrier with a handful of bulky instruments, and the other came in a bright blue bag with red handles and a white pawprint on the side. It had a comprehensive range, including toy bandages, pill bottles, cream jars, syringes, a stethoscope and even a cone of shame. Both went into the cart after he checked to make sure the two soft animals would fit in the carrier.
Mason’ll have a field day showing her exactly how to simulate using all this stuff, he thought to himself with a grin.
“You’re really very thoughtful,” the woman said after he explained why they both had to be purchased.
Lucas specifically asked for books after that. Real books with paper pages. He was sure his mother (as a high school English teacher) would murder him in his sleep if he didn’t buy Maddy at least ten books ranging from ones she could memorise and pretend to read (which, in her grandmother’s eyes, taught her word structure and was the first step in learning to read), with ones he could read to her. And that, of course, required Spongebob bookends to hold them together.
“Your fiancé is a lucky woman if you’re willing to do all of this for your niece,” she said once the cart was full and they were heading back to the checkouts.
“Yes, he is,” Lucas agreed, deliberately sliding in Boyd’s gender without making a huge issue of it.
Her eyes widened in horror. “Oh, I’m so sorry. Wow, I really shouldn’t make that assumption anymore, and I apologise.”
Because this was New York. “Apology accepted,” Lucas said, waving it aside. Boyd might have been embarrassed, but thankfully, he wasn’t here. “Thanks again for all your help.”
* * *
((Author's extra-long note:
Heya guys! Just letting you know I need to take a week off. [It’s nothing to do with the community here, I promise! I love writing this, and I’ll be back as soon as I can.]
In fact it's … you know what? Stuff it. You guys might as well know. Remember how I mentioned earlier this year we were fighting for more care for my special needs daughter?
That’s the issue.
Our support coordinator has our written authority to act on our behalf. Yet we’ve been told in writing from the government department that if she doesn’t back off, the whole request, including thousands of dollars of specialists interviewing our daughter and reporting their findings, will be deleted, and our request, including all-new interviews and reports, will have to start all over again.
I’m almost at the point where I’m not sleeping, but our support coordinator has promised us to fight because, in her words, “This is getting ridiculous.”
I’ve been really struggling to write this week with everything going on in the background. I’ve finally admitted I need to pull back (just for one week—I mean it when I say how much I love this writing and the little community we’ve formed) to focus on sorting out the mess, so that my writing isn’t tarnished by the battlelines that are being drawn up in the background.
(I already scrapped a page and a half because my anger at things [I bounce between anger and depression] had people who were usually very chill (Robbie) acting in a very aggressive manner that simply wasn’t them. Because of this, I’ve already used up several of my backlog this week and I loathe to lose any more, given how hard they were to build up. (The thought of using them up without others to take their place was also adding to my stress.)
And I was told by my beta reader, ‘Given you’ve been doing this for over three years, and you’ve only had the occasional day off due to sickness, take the week and regroup, stronger than ever.
I agreed. This means my next post will be on Monday, the 27th, Australian Time.
This means my next post will be on Monday, the 27th, Australian Time.
I hope with all my heart that you’ll all still be with me when I return next week.
Karen. ))
((All comments welcome. Good or bad, I’d love to hear your thoughts 🥰🤗))
I made a family tree/diagram of the Mystallian family that can be found here
For more of my work, including WPs: Angel466 or an index of previous WPS here.
FULL INDEX OF BOB THE HOBO TO DATE CAN BE FOUND HERE!!

https://reddit.com/link/1cu2vgs/video/xwbytsbo2z0d1/player
In today's competitive online landscape, it is more important than ever to maximize your website's conversion rate. Conversion Rate Optimisation (CRO) is the process of improving your website's performance to increase the percentage of visitors who take a desired action, whether it's making a purchase, signing up for a newsletter, or filling out a contact form. By implementing proven CRO strategies, you can enhance your online presence, increase website conversions, and ultimately boost your business growth.
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Welcome back, fellow mobile gamers :) As per tradition, here are my weekly mobile game recommendations based on the most interesting games I played and that were covered on MiniReview this week! :) I hope you'll enjoy some of them.
Support these posts (and YouTube content + development of MiniReview) on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/NimbleThor <3
This episode includes a great racing game, a fun arcade platformer, a great deck-builder roguelike RPG, an arcade casual game, and a neat deck-building dungeon crawler.
New to these posts? Check out the first one from 304 weeks ago here.

Let's get to the games:

Art of Rally [Game Size: 2.3 GB] ($4.99)

Genre: Racing / Simulation - Offline
Orientation: Landscape
Required Attention: Full
tl;dr review by NimbleThor:
Art of Rally is a rally racing game with an amazing atmosphere, several fun game modes that range from casual to hardcore, and deep gameplay customization settings.
The main career mode has us play through several years of rally history on tracks all around the world, unlocking new cars and skins as we progress.
In addition to the campaign, however, there is a custom rally mode, a time-attack mode where we can try all of the game’s vehicles, a free-roam mode where we drive around a large open world to collect items, and daily and weekly online events with leaderboards.
What I like the best about Art of Rally is that it can be as casual or hardcore as you want. Free roaming is a fun laid-back experience while the time-attack modes are incredibly challenging. And even in the career mode, we can pick the difficulty of our AI opponents.
The touch controls are okay but lack different options. Thankfully, the game plays perfectly with a Bluetooth controller, and there are lots of customization options for everything from the HUD to the interface and gameplay, including changing the steering sensitivity, enabling anti-lock braking, and much more.
The game has a great atmosphere, and the low-poly art style and minimalistic UI fit nicely. Unfortunately, loading between menus and levels is slow, and I ran into a few minor bugs - so the game isn’t perfectly ported from PC.
Art of Rally is a $4.99 premium game with a single $1.99 optional DLC that adds additional map areas.
It’s a game more about precision than driving super-fast, so if that’s what you’re looking for, I think you’ll enjoy Art of Rally – especially if you have a controller to play it with.
Check it out on Google Play: Here
Check it out on MiniReview (website version):: Art of Rally

Level Devil - NOT A Troll Game [Total Game Size: 87 MB] (Free)

Genre: Platform / Arcade - Offline
Orientation: Landscape
Required Attention: Full
tl;dr review by Ark:
Level Devil is an easy arcade platformer with no surprises or frustrations at all… or is it?
The game has us move left, right, and jump to navigate seemingly simple one-screen stages. But as we progress, the game starts trolling us in lots of unexpected ways.
Floors suddenly disappear beneath our feet, spikes spawn at what looks like safe spots, and the game sometimes even changes the rules of physics by lowering the gravity or reversing it altogether.
So you better be prepared for some rage-inducing deaths. But to me, the game’s main appeal is exactly these unexpected twists. The game quickly becomes all about anticipating the next troll attempt, and nothing beats the satisfaction I got from outsmarting a level in my first attempt.
There are 80 stages in total, with the game autosaving every 5 stages. And while some stages are challenging, they’re all short and concise. The controls are also simple and responsive. Unfortunately, there is no music at all, and the graphics are very minimal, with just a single yellow-reddish color scheme that gets old in no time.
Level Devil monetizes via occasional forced ads between levels and deaths. Thankfully, I didn’t personally find the ads to be too intrusive, even with me dying a lot.
Despite being a troll game, it balances overall fun vs. overall difficulty very well. So I was able to complete it relatively easily without getting too frustrated. You could say I had a "devilish good time" beating the game.
Check it out on Google Play: Here
Check it out on MiniReview (website version):: Level Devil

Loop Hero [Game Size: 250 MB] (Free Trial)

Genre: RPG / Deck-Builder / Roguelike - Offline
Orientation: Landscape
Required Attention: Some
tl;dr review by JBMessin:
Loop Hero is a mobile port of an incredibly unique tactical roguelike that mixes lots of gameplay elements, including deck-building, auto-battling, resource management, and city-building.
We begin the game in a place outside space and time on a dangerous path that forms a loop. Our character traverses the loop on his own, automatically fighting the enemies that spawn every day. These encounters provide us with loot that we equip to grow stronger and cards that are used to alter the loop.
Playing a card somewhere on the path changes what happens every time our hero walks through that part of the loop. For example, we may place a grove that spawns a rat every 2 days, which we then fight to grow stronger. This ability to customize the loop is one of the most unique aspects of the game, and I really enjoyed it.
After our first campfire is built, we begin to meet heroes who are just as lost as we are. Through short dialogues with them, we start to learn about the game’s light city-building mechanics. There are plenty of buildings to construct that offer all kinds of new and interesting gameplay mechanics - and even new classes to go on expeditions with.
What I immediately appreciated about Loop Hero was its top-notch soundtrack reminiscent of early 8-bit games like Castlevania, and the sprites that are stylized to match the gloomy setting but still vibrant in their design.
The biggest downside is that my large fingers sometimes made it hard to see where I was placing things. The game is definitely best enjoyed on larger phones.
Loop Hero is free to try, with a single $6.99 iAP unlocking the full game.
If you enjoy excellent roguelikes with unique gameplay mechanics, I think you’ll enjoy Loop Hero.
Check it out on Google Play: Here
Check it out on MiniReview (website version):: Loop Hero

Tumble Rush [Game Size: 159 MB] (Free)

Genre: Arcade / Casual - Offline
Orientation: Landscape
Required Attention: Full
tl;dr review by NimbleThor:
Tumble Rush is a fun, fast-paced marble maze arcade game where we guide a ball through small top-down levels while avoiding obstacles, traps, and holes.
Apart from rolling around with our sphere character, the only other thing we can do is tap an interaction button that activates/deactivates doors, turn on fans that let us get over obstacles, and much more.
Despite the additional puzzle elements introduced along the way, the game is very easy in the beginning – maybe even to a fault. I quickly grew bored with the early levels. But thankfully, if you stick with the game, it eventually becomes much harder.
The coins we collect in each level are used to unlock new cosmetics for our character. But what’s really cool is that they also completely change the design and theme of every level. So unlocking cosmetics quickly became my primary objective.
While the standard mode is relatively easy and lacks a bit of variety, the game also features a much more challenging time attack mode, where we attempt to finish levels fast enough to earn three stars. And if we get bored with that, there’s an endless mode where we earn more and more gold the further we get.
The standard gyroscopic controls work alright, but I personally preferred one of the touch control options.
Tumble Rush monetizes by showing ads between levels. They appear relatively frequently but can thankfully be removed via a single $1.99 iAP.
It’s an arcade game that gets better the further you get. So if you’re looking for a fun game that can be played as casually or competitively as you want, I think you might like Tumble Rush.
Check it out on Google Play: Here
Check it out on MiniReview (website version):: Tumble Rush

SOULVARS (Game Size: 346 MB] ($4.99)

Genre: Deck-Building / Dungeon Crawler - Offline
Orientation: Portrait
Required Attention: Some
tl;dr review by AlexSem:
SOULVARS is a futuristic mix of a jRPG and a deck builder, where we fight demonic creatures using a deck of cards produced by the gear we equip.
Working for a secret government organization, our job is to maintain peace by engaging in bloody confrontations with hungry spirits that invade the human world via spontaneous portal-like breaches.
The combat system is quite elaborate. First of all, our deck is defined by the gear we equip, and each card lets us execute an action, such as using a shield, performing various elemental attacks, or dealing different types of physical damage.
Picking two different types of cards allows us to perform devastating combo actions. But we must also pay attention to our enemies’ resistances, constantly charge our “burst” meter to eventually turn into a powerful monster, and link together attacks of multiple characters. And this is just a small portion of the game’s many combat mechanics.
Mindlessly executing random moves works for a while, but we eventually face enemies so strong that this tactic isn’t enough. This is where the game's complex combat systems comes into play, and we need to learn all its intricacies and meticulously manage our equipment to win. This will be too challenging for some players, but a joy for others.
The exploration part of the game consists of navigating maze-like rooms, interacting with the environment, collecting loot, talking to people, and engaging in random battles - an old jRPG structure that is apparently still popular among certain audiences.
SOULVARS is a premium game that costs $4.99.
While the game’s repetitiveness and unengaging plot eventually make the gameplay a bit boring, there’s more than enough entertainment for fans of complex combat systems.
Check it out on Google Play: Here
Check it out on MiniReview (website version):: SOULVARS
NEW: Sort + filter reviews and games I've played (and more) in my app MiniReview: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=minireview.best.android.games.reviews
Special thanks to the Patreon Producers Wrecking Golf, "marquisdan", "Lost Vault", "Farm RPG", and "Mohaimen" who help make these posts possible through their Patreon support <3
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When Mars and Rahu are positioned together in the 12th house of a Vedic astrology chart, it creates a unique and potent influence on various aspects of life. The 12th house is associated with losses, expenses, isolation, foreign lands, spirituality, and the subconscious mind. Here's a detailed look at the implications of having Mars and Rahu in the 12th house:
Mars in the 12th House
Mars is a planet of energy, action, aggression, and courage. In the 12th house, Mars can manifest its energy in several ways:

• Expenses and Losses: Mars here can lead to high expenditures, sometimes due to impulsive actions or conflicts. There might be financial losses due to hasty decisions or hidden enemies.
• Isolation and Solitude: This placement might indicate a period of isolation or time spent in seclusion, possibly in foreign lands or for spiritual retreats. Mars' aggressive nature can cause internal restlessness.
• Spirituality and Subconscious: Mars in the 12th house can drive a person towards exploring their inner self, often through intense and transformative experiences. There could be a fascination with the occult or hidden knowledge.
• Foreign Lands: The native might find themselves working or living abroad, often in challenging or strenuous conditions.
• Health Issues: There could be concerns related to the feet or sleep disorders, as the 12th house also governs these aspects.

Rahu in the 12th House
Rahu, the North Node of the Moon, represents desires, illusions, obsessions, and unconventional paths. When placed in the 12th house:

• Unconventional Spirituality: Rahu's presence can drive an intense interest in mysticism, spirituality, and the occult. The native might pursue these through unconventional or non-traditional means.
• Foreign Connections: Rahu often indicates a strong connection with foreign lands and people. The native might have significant experiences or breakthroughs abroad.
• Hidden Enemies and Obsessions: There could be hidden enemies or secretive challenges that the native might face. Rahu can create obsessions or compulsions related to the subconscious mind.
• Losses and Expenses: Like Mars, Rahu can amplify the themes of losses and expenses, but these might come through unexpected or unusual channels.

Combined Influence of Mars and Rahu in the 12th House
When Mars and Rahu are together in the 12th house, their combined energies can create a powerful and complex influence:

• Intense Drive for Spirituality: There might be a strong, almost obsessive drive towards spiritual growth and understanding. This can lead to unconventional spiritual practices or deep exploration of the subconscious.
• Challenges in Foreign Lands: The native might face significant challenges or conflicts while abroad. This combination can lead to sudden and unexpected events related to foreign connections.
• High Expenses and Losses: The presence of both these planets can lead to heightened expenses and potential financial losses, often through impulsive actions or deceit.
• Isolation and Inner Turmoil: The native might experience periods of isolation or self-imposed solitude, coupled with internal restlessness and conflict. This can lead to significant personal transformation if channeled positively.
• Hidden Enemies and Conflicts: There could be hidden enemies or secretive conflicts that the native needs to be aware of. Mars' aggression combined with Rahu's deceit can create complex situations that require careful handling.

Mitigating Factors
The overall impact of Mars and Rahu in the 12th house will also depend on other factors in the birth chart:

• Aspect of Benefic Planets: Benefic aspects from planets like Jupiter or Venus can help mitigate some of the negative effects.
• Ruler of the 12th House: The position and strength of the 12th house ruler will also play a significant role in determining the overall influence.
• Nakshatra Placement: The specific nakshatras in which Mars and Rahu are placed can provide more nuanced insights into their effects.

Summary
Mars and Rahu together in the 12th house form a powerful combination that can promote intense spiritual quests, challenges in foreign lands, high expenditure and internal conflict. The native may experience significant transformational experiences, often through unconventional or difficult paths. As always, the wider context of the entire birth chart is important for a comprehensive interpretation. For which you can use The Kundli website. Which can give an accurate information based on your birth chart.

Neurodivergents & neurotypicals alike both suffer from self-limiting narratives.
The power of belief is strong -- If we believe we can't do something, that will often be the deciding factor on whether that thing is done. We are the stories we tell ourselves.
For neurodivergent people, these challenges are tenfold, as there are significantly greater, all too real, challenges that we have to fight through, and these can reinforce the self-limiting beliefs we hold. Especially in the age of social media, where self-limiting beliefs of others are all too often stated as unquestionable fact, and thus, can become more easily engrained.
It was one of the few benefits of growing up before the larger awareness of ADHD & Autism. Don't get me wrong, the downsides were tremendous, but not having a million voices whispering in my ear that I couldn't do something helped to ingrain a mindset of perceived limits as obstacles to overcome. That my symptoms could be improved. That I could learn social skills, time management & how to organise things, even if the barriers were higher for me than others.
I didn't start that way, however. Even without social media constantly reinforcing my self-doubt, I still had overcome a great many barriers. And the first opponent I needed to beat was the jailer inside my brain. That voice telling me that I couldn't do things because I was autistic. That things were hopeless.
It was a long, hard-fought battle.
With every victory, however, that voice inside me grew a little quieter. As I made friends, performed in plays & films, told stories, had sex, developed meaningful relationships, both romantic & platonic. As my empathy grew, and my ability to read & understand people blossomed beyond even a lot of neurotypicals, the voice in my head that told me I was beyond these things slowly sewed its mouth shut.
Was it easy? Fuck no, I'm racked with trauma that I'm still sorting out. I hope that, as we continue to progress a society, we can continue to create pathways that allow neurodivergent people to grow & thrive without the constant fear & imposter syndrome that I had to endure to become the person I am now. Don't get me wrong, I love who I am now, but I had to endure a lot to get there. A lot that could have been mitigated with the right support. That's not to say that I had zero support, but so often, the "comfort" people would provide would often come in the form of a well-meaning, but damaging: "Have you thought about giving up?"
I do truly believe it is beneficial for us neurodivergent folks to challenge ourselves, and to push the limits of what we believe to be possible. And we should be encouraged to challenge ourselves. Support needs to be that right blend. Not enabling the defeatist attitudes that will ultimately sabotage us, but not being abusive in how hard we're pushed either.
Neither approach will result in a desirable outcome, and it is only by gently, but firmly pushing someone's challenge line, that we can see real progress.
I had to self-motivate for most of my life, and it was exhausting. Rewarding, ultimately, but tiring.
I hope in the future, we can strike that balance & give future neurodivergents the structure they need to push themselves in healthy ways, and go beyond what they ever thought they were capable of.
So, what self-limiting beliefs have you overcome? What narratives did you used to believe? Or others used to tell you, that you were ultimately able to overcome?
Do you feel that you overcame these limits in a healthy way? Or were you forced to wade through the muck to get the other side?
I'm seriously curious because I do think that, at least sometimes, we've gotta give our potential to evolve & grow more credit while also acknowledging the great challenges that come with having brains wired like ours.

First, I accidentally read a spoiler regarding Scribe Haylen. Is there any possible way to save her, send her to a community, have her become a companion, or possibly romance her without using mods? In my opinion she deserves more of a chance in Fallout 4.
The other is Shelly Tiller. I didn't kill her during the Silver Shroud missions, as she wasn't a bad person overall. Unfortunately, I killed Sinjin and saved Kent Connolly, thereby completing the Silver Shroud quests. I went looking for Shelly at the National Guard Training Yard to send her to a community, but she wasn't there. Did she go elsewhere, or is she gone after completing the quest line?
Lastly, but not least. Trashcan Carla. That thieving witch stole my power armor. I read that you can pickpocket the fusion core, and she'll jump out, OR she'll show up at Beacon Hill and it'll be sitting next to her, in which case you can just get it back. However, she was taunting me with it, and being her typical nasty self, and WOULD NOT leave Sanctuary. I went to Beacon Hill SEVERAL times looking for her to appear, but she didn't. Just stayed at Sanctuary during the day hours, everyday, in my power armor. My pickpocketing skills were not built up at all. I attempted anyway to try to resolve the issue. She then turned hostile in my power armor, so I really had no choice but to put her down with my Two Shot Assault Rifle right in the road of Sanctuary. I wasn't wearing any power armor myself at the time and my companion, MacCready did nothing to help, not that I needed it, but it's the point. You're companion's supposed to provide support in conflict. I also read that you can shoot the fusion core and Trashcan Carla will jump out of the power armor as well. It's too late now, she's dead in my street with her caravan brahmin walking around while she draws flies. The occasional settler on non used companion will walk by and stop at her body also. Is there a way a way to remove her??? I tried, but it says that she's too heavy because she's lying dead in my old power armor frame. At this point she's an eyesore. I also read that she is/was an Institute "snitch", so I really don't feel bad, except for not having the convenience of a trader in my settlement now.
I'm playing on the remastered quality version of Fallout 4 on PS5. Any help or answers/advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

There are fundamental metaphysical and ontological superiority of the Advaita view over Buddhism. The debates undertaken by Acharya Shankara (Acharya) against Buddhists were on questions of logic, phenomology, ontology and metaphysics. Without superiority of logic and inference, it was not possible to defeat the nihilistic schools of thought like Buddhism. The arguments between Shankara and Buddhists were technical, complex and long-drawn. But I have attempted a simpler version for our understanding of the basic positions of Advaita versus Buddhism (All Schools) in a modern set-up.
[nb. Gautam Buddha (Gotama/Tathagata/Sakyamuni) is one of the greatest reformer of Vedic religion. Though he was a heretic who rejected and discarded the magnificent Vedas; yet his contribution to the Vedic Hindu system is immense. Like, Acharya Shankara, Tathagata Gotama is immensely revered.]
[The Acharya invites a learned Buddhist Monk to a cup of coffee and of course, debate over respective Schools of Thought!]
Acharya: How was your day?
Buddhist Monk: The question is immaterial and irrelevant.
Acharya: Oh! Will you kindly state why do you say so?
Buddhist Monk: The workaday life is just a passing illusion. The so-called “manifold world” of material and mental elements arises solely through the causal co-operation of the transitory factors of existence (Called Dharmas) those depend functionally upon each other. Since, the material and mental universe arises through the concurrence of forces that are not permanent, the so-called World is not permanent. Everything that we call “world” are illusory, momentary. [He lays down the Sarvastivada, or, Sautrantika view of Buddhism]
Acharya: Oh. Heavy fire! Let me rephrase you. So what you are basically saying is that the perceived World is momentary; just an illusion – ever changing, and that there is no permanent essence of anything anywhere of the empirical Universe, be it mental or material, cognitive or non-perceptive.
Buddhist Monk: Yes, that’s the statement. Everything in the empirical world is only a stream of passing Dharmas, which are mere processes - impersonal and evanescent processes. These Dharmas can be characterized as Anatta (Anatma - Bereft of Self), i.e., being without a persisting self, without independent existence. [The Dharma theory of Buddhism]
Acharya: Ok. I get your point of view about momentariness, impermanence and Anatta. May I ask you a very simple question? When you started the sentence “The Question is immaterial and irrelevant” – it was immaterial and irrelevant to whom? What or who is the Subject to whom those perceptions appeared?
Buddhist Monk: (Enraged) To no one in particular. There is nothing more to this alleged (sic) world’s existence than the co-ordinated flux of wide variety of elemental, co-dependent factors (Dharmas), which bring forth collective experience of world-consciousness in individual and universal aspects. So, the perception occurred to some non-existent entity.
Acharya: Ok! Hypothetically accepting your view, tell me Monk, who is the witness to these arising of dependent elements? Who/what is the witness to the flux? Against what the flux is not static? If you are moving in a train at the same speed with another train, you will see both trains as stationary. A perception of speed requires comparison with a stationary object. Likewise, perception of flux requires a changeless object for measure of standard. Who/What is that?
Buddhist Monk: I object! What is the necessity of a Witness? That too, eternal permanent witness?! No way such a thing exists. People die and their trace vanishes, things get broken, Worlds get destroyed – all without leaving trace. Where is permanence?
Acharya: Hold your breath, Holy Monk. A witness is necessary in order to have a cognition of any phenomenon – take the event of your momentariness or flux. A witness can only say something is transitory or momentary. If there is no Witness, who would perceive and who would make a statement?
(This is one of the greatest novel argument of Acharya, his own contribution to logic and metaphysics – “Who is it that who sees and says Everything is impermanent – That entity has to present, existent and permanent”)
Buddhist Monk: If you say there has to be a Witness, who will witness that witness? How would you establish that Witness exists? What you say is wrong because there will be infinite regress. You say a Witness is necessary to claim cognizance. Fine, then tell me, who will say that there is a Witness? Where will this infinite loop end? In your Theory, everything has to be present to make the Witness known. This is nothing but Dependent Origination.
Acharya: Dear Friend, there is no logical necessity (Akanksha) for something to grasp the grasper. The witness stands self-proved. (This is one of the greatest sources of Pramana – Arthapatti as used by the Acharya)
Buddhist Monk: Even if there is any Witness, that entity; material or intellectual will be momentary, ever-changing, always in flux. So, one can’t say there is any witness at all.
Acharya: You seem to insinuate that everything is momentary and transitional – the flux keeps on changing every nano-second, the reality changing every nanosecond just like waves of sea erase the previous impressions in sand made by the preceding wave. So, who is there who perceives and makes this claim that Nothing is permanent?
And, against what standard you measure permanence relative to impermanence? Everything is impermanent relative to what? If everything if temporary, then how would the concept of any sort of permanence even arise? What is the ground for you to stand on? What is the reference point? Against what measuring rod will you judge impermanence?
Monk, Even to say Nothing exists, there has to be a relative plane of Existence. Else against what would you say Nothing exists, if you don’t know what Existence is? And when you say non-being is there – so logically, non-being exists – impermanence is permanently there, you are putting yourself in serious logical snare. Don’t you think by negating everything you are caught in an absurd redux? The entire Theory of Impermanence is erroneous.
Agreed what one sees or perceived is fleeting, transitory. But then how do you create your own locus standi for the transitoriness to be perceived? Who is the witness, the spectator? There has to be One. The primordial ground, the eternal essence, which is at the basis of everything and from which the whole world has arisen (the Brahman of the Upanishads). There is no void, all that exists is Fullness, Brahman. The world is not non-existent (Asat), but it is illusory (Mithya) meaning, it exist, but appears to us other than what is really is because of Ajanan (Ignorance), Avidya (Nescience) and Maya (Illusions).
Buddhist Monk: (Causes digression because there is no reply to this argument) Come on, then where is the proof that there is something permanent, some ever-present continuum?
Acharya: Yes, I will. The answer is in anusmrteh cha [Brahm Sutra - II.ii.25:] meaning “In memory too”. All of us have memories of good experiences, bad ones, many-a-times shared memories. Now let me ask you something Monk. If you say everything is momentary, how do you explain memory? Memory falsifies your entire base. The [Buddhist] doctrine of momentariness must imply momentariness of the perceiver as well as of the perceived, an implication which the phenomenon of memory proves to be wrong and completely false. If both perceived object and the perceiver change, there would be no connect – and there would not be any case for memory! Because the entire scene changes – so every moment Man should rise and ask Who am I? Where am I? If the man who remembers is different from the man who apprehended we would never have such notions as "I saw it." – both ‘I’ (Subject) and ‘it’ (Object) would have changed over the moment. Phenomenon of memory shows that your basic tenets are wrong. The theoretical edifice has been created on a false foundation.(You notice how he brings in the Atman theory (first bolded sentence) indirectly. What does Shankara mean? He is attacking Buddhists who think of the ‘I’ sense in the following manner: I …. I…. I (where the ‘I’ sense does not exist during the dotted time period). What Sankara is arguing is that how do these Buddhists know that the series is not I1…I2…I3 etc where I1, I2, I3 are three different ego-consciousnesses? How can there be a stable personality which remembers a unique past or recognises old friends if the ego is unstable? In fact it is these Buddhists who need an unchanging principle (the Atman) that witnesses everything for all time (i.e. even during the gaps in ego-consciousness). Only if this Atman exists can Buddhists avoid problems regarding stability of personality. Otherwise a person who is Rama at one moment will consider himself Lakshmana in the next moment after the ego comes back. If these Buddhists now say that the ego-consciousness is stable and not momentary in order to save themselves from this conundrum then they have refuted themselves. Sankara then goes on to say that he can give a similar argument refuting Buddhist realists who regard the external world to exist momentarily. Even in this case of a momentary external world you will need an Atman (an unchanging witness for all time) to give stability to our perception. So in either case you need the Atman principle to make sense of our experience)
Buddhist Monk: Ok. Fair Point. I can’t argue against that. If I say there is perception, there has to be a perceiver. That’s exactly why I say there is neither an object of perception nor a perceiver. The World is unreal. Do you deny the unreality of the outer world?
Acharya: No. Here I am in full agreement with you. The so-called world is unreal to the extent of what we ordinarily see. The names and forms (Nama-Roopa) are fleeting.
[This is a unique and great similarity between Acharya’s Vedanta and the Buddhist ontological world view – Illusoriness of external World]
But it does not mean that there is no basis to this unreality. Not “Sarvam kshanikam kshanikam - Sarvam Shunyam Shunyam”!
[That is the fundamental difference between Acharya’s Advaita (Singularity of existence) Vedant and the Buddhist Nihilistic (Absence of existence) view]
You are wrong again Friend, because in Vijnanavada, you dwell on ‘only & mere’ perception to make the entire conscious Universe. If you have presumed perception, then whose perception? Perception of what? How can you presume and base your theory on the effect only, without looking at the causes? Such a theory is inadequate, inaccurate and false. The Great Gotama too fell into that trap of not inquiring deep enough. To formulate a simple theory, he ignored to delve into the true cause of suffering – the cause of suffering is not desire or attachment per se – but those are intermediate causes. Like a link in a chain. There is still another layer to the inquiry into desires, attachment, and bondage – that is Avidya and Ajnana. The nescience and ignorance cause desire and attachment. Gotama failed to see the true enemy.
Buddhist Monk: [Fuming) How can you question the Tathagata? He was omniscient (A Buddhist axiom).
Acharya: What proof is there that Tathagata Gotama was omniscient? I say No, he was not. And look at me, I am beyond suffering. So, how do you refute me? This Buddhist axiom is completely wrong.
Anyways, our coffee has arrived. Take this cup in your hand Shaman. What do you see?
Buddhist Monk: I see nothing actually. This apparent cup with apparent coffee in it, these, at the deepest layer are made up of discrete individual particles. The deepest level of both the material world and our consciousness is considered to be discrete, separate entities. Thus when we introspect into the deepest layer of our consciousness, we will find that it is composed not from a single homogenous whole but of discrete ‘particles’ – always in flux, always changing – never permanent.
Acharya: (Smiles) Oh, Dear Friend. I get your point. True there is no real cup – the cup is nothing but made up of clay – clay given another form and shape with heat. So, there is clay inside the cup. The cylindrical object (roopa) is the mere appearance which we have named a cup (Nama), there is no Cup as such, but clay in another form. I fully agree when you said You didn’t see a cup. But I disagree when you failed to see the clay in the cup. You can never assume clay out. No matter how deep will you go, there has to be a smaller and smaller entity which will exist. You can not extend the hair-splitting to non-existence. In the final split, something has to exist. And it does exist. Whatever it is, Quantum calls those particles, String people call those Strings, Relativists call those Energy – whatever name you may call, there has to be something that exists. It was there when the Universe started with Big Bang, it was there before it too (else how could the Big Bang singularity have started), it was always there, it is there in everything, it will always be there. We are all made up of Star dust. That star which existed in Big Bang, from which elements got created, from which Space came out. That is the Truth Dear Friend, you can’t assume that out only because you don’t see the subtlest level. You have stopped your quest before you reached the ultimate stage. Yes, particles may be there (Vaishesika friend tells me), particles may be in flux where you wont know what exactly is happening to them (Mister Schrödinger will tell you after 1300 years); but don’t get deluded – there is something that is still more subtle, and pervades everything. Everything can not come out of Nothing. The deepest Truth is Single, homogenous, a whole (Purnam).
Buddhist Monk: Oh. What is the proof, Acharya?
Acharya: Proof. I can offer you Shruti pramana (Scriptures as proof). But you and Tathagat are heretics, you don’t believe in the primacy of Shrutis.
To us, words of Shruti are unquestionable. Even the other day, Mandan Mishra (The great MImanshak) agreed to the same. The Vedas, the Shruti Shastra, the Puranas, Smriti, all teach an ens realissimum (an entity of highest reality) as the primordial cause of all existence, from which everything has arisen and with which it again merges, either temporarily or forever. And that sub-stratum always exists. Know my friend, that is the Only Truth, and Nothing but the Truth – the Sat-Chit-Ananda – the Brahman. “Sarvam khalvidam brahma' that is “All this is indeed Brahman” – and not Sarvam Shunyam Shunyam.
But for you My Friend, here is the argument. Everyone has the notion "I am"; no one can deny the self, because when you go to deny – there would be the self of the denier – who would scale up the denial.
[Both these arguments, that of the Witness and that of Identity, are at the very center of Acharya Shankara's system of Advaita Vedanta]
The Acharya Continued:
“Brahmaivedam amritam
Purastad brahma pascad brahma
Dakshinatas cottarena
Adhas cordhvam ca prasritam
Brahmaivedam visvam idam varishtham
Translation:
“That Brahman is Eternal.
Brahman in front and Brahman in back,
In the South, on the North,
Also Overhead and Below - expanded,
This Brahman is the Universe, this is the Greatest.”
-Mundaka Upanishad, Mundaka II.Khanda 2.Shloka 12
In other words, that supreme Brahman effulgence spreads throughout both the material and spiritual
That Brahman is known by multifarious names My Friend! People see it as Atma, as Ishwara, as Aum - the Pranav, as Prjnanam, there are many names. But there is nothing in those names. [Om Tat Sat]
I will add here my Friend, your Mahayana Buddhist scripture preaches the existence of the "Tathagata Garbha" (Buddha-Matrix/Essence) within all sentient creatures. This Mahasanghikas (Sect of Buddhism) notion of Tathagata Garbha is so close to Advaitic concept of Atman – the manifestation of Brahman in jeeva. This does not differ from a permanent Atman, though you never accept it!! You accept the Advaitic view by altering the nomenclature!
Buddhist Monk: (Started to leave the debate in fury. Acharya requests him to finish coffee). By Gotama! It’s so hot. My lips are burnt.
Acharya: Stop here. What did you say? Your lips are burnt? You are suffering, are not you? But at the same time you say there is no Soul. So, who is suffering? Buddhaghosa (Classical Theravada) has said that “there is only suffering, but nobody who suffers”, Mahayanist Śhantideva has interpreted Buddha that “the person who experiences suffering does not exist”. Is not that a ridiculous proposition? So why all these teachings? For whom? Who were Tathagata’s subjects?

Buddhist Monk: Come on Acharya! You too teach the unreality as cause of suffering and grief and pain. The world is nothing but an idea – a dream-like construct where nothing is real (Idealism in Buddhism/Vijnanavada). And now why do you criticize our unreality while professing yours?
Acharya: No. You have not understood the true essence of Advaita then. The unreality of external world that I teach is not based on nothing (It is not Nihilist). My unreality does not base on absence of reality – but on flawed perception of reality. Unlike you, I don’t say there is NO reality at all! I say there is reality and only ONE reality, but the way we perceive or take cognizance is erroneous because of Avidya, Ajnaan and Maya. Once the perception of snake goes away from the rope on the floor, there remain to Snake, only a rope! And there was never a Snake at all, it was rope all throughout. So, the unreal (Snake) was real till the true real (Rope) was realized. After realization, there was never a snake. Likewise, after you realize Brahman, you will experience that there was never a World of otherness. There was always Brahman, here there, inside outside. You are Brahman. It is an absolute identity and this is ultimately proved simply by psychological experience. Shruti has maintained "Tat tvam asi" (That art Thou); "Brahmasmi" (I am Brahman). This is no ‘similarity’ as if we should say, "I am something like Brahman", but full and complete identity, “I am the Brahman” and “Brahman is Me”.
The Great Tathagata saw suffering, but never endevoured to go deep into its causes. He saw the unrealness of the work-a-day, realized it fully, but he did not realize the true cause (Avidya) and the entity beyond the cause (Brahman). He did not see that strand of argument.
Buddhist Monk: Nah! Sakyamuni did not believe in philosophization or polemics. In Shoola Malunkyovada Sutta, the Tathagata has clarified that he won’t venture into questions of philosophy of suffering, but only the method as to end suffering - "The important thing is to get rid of the poisoned arrow (Suffering) that has pierced your heart, not to inquire where it came from (Source of suffering)”.
Acharya: I know. But then, what did the ilks of Nagarjuna, Vasubabdhu, Asanga, Dharmakirti, Aswaghosa, etc. do? Then why all of them attempted complex philosophisation? No wonder that they failed to bring out a holistic Theory of Being due to inherent contradictions and flaws in the basic tenets. Were they not Vipra Bhikshus (Buddhist Bhikshus at exterior, Brahmin Vedists by intellectual disposition) rather than Buddhists?

I also know the Great Buddha avoided philosophical and metaphysical questions. He did not look deep enough. He just sensed the symptoms of the ailment of suffering and not the true cause. Desire, bondage and attachment etc. are symptoms, not causes. But the Vedas and the Shruti inquired deeper – into the Source of suffering, and the method of Vedant interprets Shruti correctly by pointing out the real causes being ‘Avidya’ (Nescience), and false imputation (Adhyasa) due to Maya.
Buddhist Monk: Acharya!
Acharya: No, don’t say Nothing ever again! The Great Buddhist teachers did ‘exist’ and so did Tathagata. If you firmly believe in Tathagata; then you believe in his existence too! Their mortal embodiments were temporal, but teachings eternal, their thought eternal. That Jnana is eternal. That’s where Brahman shines. It is the light by which everything is seen, the light of which the sun and moon are pale reflections. It is not only real but so egregiously real that the work-a-day world fades into mist beside it.
Buddhist Monk: Starts to leave muttering No, No, No…..
[This is a very simple exposition. Mostly consisting of the Advaitic critique of Buddhism gleaned from various sources. A detailed account would require a thesis.]

This is a really long story but I’ve been so desperate to just tell it from start to finish so thank you in advance if you make it all the way through.
To provide context to the rest of the story, I (22f) was in a very bad, very controlling relationship for three years. Near to the start of this relationship, I worked at an escape room where I met an awesome group of people and we started to play DND together – DM’d by the guy who ended up becoming my best friend, we'll call him Brad (23m). My ex got worse over time in various ways, but one of which was his jealousy which seemed to focus on Brad. Every time that I would go to DND I would have to remind my ex that Brad was already in a relationship with his long-time partner, Bella, and therefore he did not have feelings for me. This came up constantly and was always a fight.
It was incredibly difficult to escape, but with the support of my three closest friends, Jenna (23f), Millie (26f), and Brad, eventually I got out. I moved back in with my mum, but I was in a very bad mental state at the time and would do everything in my power not to be alone. For this reason, I would have sleepovers at all my close friends’ houses as often as I could – sleeping in Brad and Bella’s closet when I would stay at theirs. I did become closer with all of the other members of my DND group too (there were 7 of us in total) but for the purposes of keeping things simple I will focus on these four. I leaned on these friendships hard. All my friendships had been so monitored and controlled for years before this and I was so excited to be a normal adult finally. For about six months, life was amazing.
It was some time around October that I met my now partner (22m) and we started to form a relationship. He was kind and funny and I was so excited to share it with all my friends. Brad always seemed apprehensive about it, but I figured that was just because of my previous relationship. It was also around this time that Brad started struggling with something but wouldn’t share what. Jenna and I genuinely theorised that he was terminally ill with the way that he was acting. One night, I had driven Brad home from work, and I used the opportunity to ask about it because everyone was really worried. After a bit of coaxing, he told me that he thought that he was polyamorous. He had been with Bella for about five years at this point and he was worried by revealing this to her that he would destroy their relationship. He said that aside from his therapist, I was the first person that he had told and asked me not to tell anyone, which I obviously agreed to. Eventually he told her, and they told the group together, and said that they were going to make it work.
It was about December now, and I moved jobs and fell into a depressive episode. I stopped seeing my friends very much at all, and at the worse of it I had made an attempt at my life. My partner was amazing through this considering how little time we had been together, and not long after I started to get help and rebuild. When I tried to rejoin DND, everything felt different. Brad was suddenly talking over me when my character would try to speak up, wouldn’t have NPCs speak to my character, and really he would hardly look at me. I had tried to meet up with Jenna, Millie, and Brad, to tell them about what had happened with me during my episode, but Brad blew me off every time. I was so stressed that I had done something wrong, but I couldn’t figure out what since I had been away for the past couple of months.
Finally, shit really hit the fan in May at Millie’s wedding. I was standing with Bella while she told the story about her and Brad working out polyamory, and in telling the story she said that she had been the first person that he had told. This threw me for a loop, since I knew that he had told me first, and it massively irked me that he had hid that from her. I left the conversation to find Jenna to tell her, to which she took me aside and told me that Brad had been in love with me for a while now, and I had caused a lot of issues in his and Bella’s relationship. I felt awful for the rest of the wedding and sat on the cold street to vent this all to my partner.
I went to a few DND sessions after that, but I felt so self-conscious about the arguments that I had apparently caused between two friends, and since Brad was basically ignoring me in the sessions anyway, I decided one day to send a short and sweet message to the group thanking them for the years of fun, but that I would be dropping out for now.
My first regret was, when Brad pressed about why I had left, softening the blow as much as possible. I did tell him that I knew about his feelings, but I said that I was mainly leaving for my mental health, which was not true as I was in a much better spot at this point. He was very angry at Jenna for telling me, but otherwise the conversation was fairly civil. He apologised, gave me more context, explained that that was why he had been distant, confirmed that I had been a big issue in his and Bella’s relationship, and explained that I was the reason that he had figured out that he was polyamorous – I expect from me staying over at their house so often. Finally, he told me that I would be welcome back to DND at any time. I said that I was frustrated that he hadn’t spoken to me like an adult because I just thought that he had hated me, and he said that I was just a complicated situation. He also told me not to tell anyone about any of it, but especially Bella that we had had that conversation as he wanted to be the one to do it. Fine. I was upset, but I still figured that I would be able to return to the group at that point.
Months pass, and I haven’t been to any group events for a combination of reasons. I feel too uncomfortable to face Brad and Bella, I figure that removing myself from the situation is the kindest thing to do to give them space, and since I can’t tell anyone else about what happened, I feel socially a bit isolated. No worries, I can rejoin the group again when I feel comfortable, right? I have Millie over one day and she asks why I left. After a bit of back and forth, I think that she knows some level of what happened, but more than that I am just desperate to get this off my chest, so I give a brief, sympathetic overview of the situation. She is an amazing listening ear, which was exactly what I needed because this had been eating me away, and she is very mature when I ask this to not affect her relationship with him. Little did I know that I had just thrown a match into a powder keg.
I’m not totally clear on what happened, but basically Brad hadn’t told Bella that we had had a conversation. Millie accidentally revealed that I had told her, and Bella (rightfully so honestly) was furious with Brad, who then was furious at me for telling Millie. In this second conversation with him, I explained that I had thought that Millie had known to a degree anyway. He kept going on about how much of an impact this had made to his and Bella’s relationship, and I got frustrated and explained that they were actually the sole reason that I had left the group when I did, and it had had a massive impact on me too. He got apologetic, but in retrospect I think it was just trying to tide me over. He told me that Bella was uncomfortable when he and I were in a room together, which put the final nail in the coffin for my hopes to ever return to the group. He still swung the conversation back around to how hard it had all been for them and ended the conversation with a long list of Bella’s insecurities. In retrospect, this was a bit random and I’m not sure why he did that. In any case, I responded with a big paragraph refuting each of her insecurities one by one and talking about how great she is. I wish that I had just sent this message straight to her, as honestly, I doubt, she would have ever seen it.
So now we’ve had two conversations, and I don’t see any way that I can return to the group. Months later again, and I see them for the first time at a Halloween party. I had made a great new group of friends at this party, and given the history, I thought that it was fairly reasonable not to go up and have a chat with them. At one point, I am talking with someone when Brad walks up, without Bella, and says hi to me. Maybe I was petty, but considering Bella wasn’t even there and one of the last things that he had told me was that Bella was uncomfortable when he and I were in a room together, I wasn’t particularly excited to chat. I just said a cordial hi, stayed in the conversation for a minute longer, and then migrated away.
Honestly, I hadn’t even thought twice about this. By this point, I hadn’t seen Jenna for maybe six months, and the rest of the DND group for even longer. The only one who I’ve stayed in contact with is Millie. One day, I ask Millie out for coffee, and about halfway through she has this look of realisation pass her face. She tells me that “she thought I knew” and that was why I had asked her out for coffee. Knew what? Well apparently, Brad and Bella had organised basically a formal meeting with the whole friend group to tell them what had happened with me on that night. Obviously, they had not told me. Millie is amazing and relays to me what happens at the meeting which thankfully is fairly true, but there are two points that irk me. One is that it is entirely “woe is them” focussed, as if I didn’t lose all of my friends, and two is that Brad makes a remark that he thinks that I knew the whole time that he had feeling for me and that I wasn’t just innocent and naive. This is infuriating for me for reasons that I will get to. What actually breaks my heart is that apparently Jenna got up at the meeting and apologised to everyone for telling me in the first place. After that, I had two more people from the group reach out and reconnect, but not everyone and not Jenna.
This all started in July of 2022, and it’s now May of 2024, so I’m largely over it, but here are some of my feelings on the matter. One, I know that I am non-confrontational, and as much as it was initially supposed to be a kindness, I do think there was an element of running away from my problems. Two, my family and close friends kept telling me that I should send screenshots of everything to group chats or tell everyone my perspective. I think that more than anything, I had already lost everyone, and I really didn’t want to turn the group against each other. I think that would have been vindictive and petty and not me. Three, maybe I should have seen the signs that he had feelings for me earlier on, and I feel a lot of guilt about that. However, I had the exact same relationship with him as I did with Millie and Jenna, and I’ve always been of the belief that males and females can absolutely be friends. Maybe my relationships with Millie and Jenna were too close too, but after having been socially isolated for three years I suppose I was and still am hazy about where the boundaries lie. To be so clear, though, nothing ever actually happened. The best clue that I can recall was when he would say I love you man, but that’s the kind of thing that we all said to each other. Otherwise, as far as I was aware, we were just really close friends. Furthermore, I had also just come out of a long-term relationship, where I was frequently convincing my ex that Brad did not have feelings for me. I never told anyone that part because I didn’t want Brad to blame himself, but now that I’ve found out I was wrong, I’ve been going down a spiral about what else my ex may have been right about and what other behaviours he had that may have been justified. I digress. I’ve mourned the loss of my friends and support network more times than I can count, and I am aware that I could have fought to stay in the group and Brad isn’t entirely to blame for that, but it does really frustrate me that, as was clear in the board meeting he and Bella held about me, what I have been through does not seem to even cross their minds. Brad was supposed to have been my best friend. Although, now I can’t help but feel like he, intentionally or not, saw me at a vulnerable point and took advantage of it to get inappropriately close to me, and we were never really “best friends”. If I could erase our entire friendship, I would in a heartbeat. At least then I would still have the rest of my friends. I am open to hearing what people have to say, but as far as I am aware my only crime was being naïve. There are honestly so many more details but this post is already obscenely long. My final note is that my partner is the real MVP as he probably heard me vent and cry about this two dozen times and supported me through all of it. Thank you so much for reading if you made it this far.

Reddit Account: u/Jon_Reid
Discord Tag: roylion44
Name and House: Damon Manderly
Age: 34 Cultural Group: Andal
Appearance: Damon has dark long shoulder length hair, a full beard and dark eyes. Tall, broad shouldered and muscular, the Lord of White Harbor is often seen in his dark armor and a trident as his staff of office. :max_bytes(150000):strip_icc():format(webp)/jason-momoa_0-da8e73e0459d48ba92735e84d4aa4fea.jpg)
Trait: Mariner
Skill(s): Admiral, Merchantman (e), Architect, Avaricious
Talent(s): Swimming, Play (Lute), Navigation
Negative Trait(s):
Starting Title(s): Lord of White Harbor, Warden of the White Knife, Shield of the Faith, Defender of the Dispossessed, Lord Marshal of the Mander, Knight of the Order of the Green Hand, Knight of the Order of the White Hand.
Starting Location: Opening Event
Alternate Characters: N/A

AC

Name and House: Alaric Manderly
Age: 22
Cultural Group: Andal
Appearance: A younger version of his elder brother with dark hair and closely cropped beard.
Trait: Inspiring
Skill(s): Vanguard (e), Ambusher
Talent(s): Heraldry, Hawking, Horse riding
Negative Trait(s):
Starting Title(s): Ser, Knight of the Order of the White Hand.
Starting Location: White Harbor
Alternate Characters: NA

Archetypes
Wyman Manderly (uncle) - Castellan
Desmond Manderly (uncle) – Master-at-Arms

Biography

Lord Damon Manderly was born in 9 BC, the eldest born son of Lord Medgar Manderly and Iolande Ashford, the widow of Ser Torgen Tallheart and the mother of two small sons. At some point after her husband’s death Iolande returned to her parents’ home in Ashford, a rather impoverished widow and berefit of financial support for her two young sons. Iolande petitioned Medgar’s friend Lord Torrhen Stark of Winterfell for help in working out her financial plight. Lord Stark sent his friend Medgar the Lord of White Harnbor to investigate and the two fell in love and married in 10 BC, a year before Damon was born.
The birth of Damon was followed by that his younger brother Daron two years later in 7 BC during which his mother died in childbirth. In 2 BC when Damon was seven years old, he was sent to be fostered in Winterfell while his brother Deron was sent to the family of their grandmother - the Ashfords.
Damon was raised in the court of Lord Torrhen becoming familiar with the culture, education, and institutions of his host and making friends with the grandsons of Torrhen Stark who was of age. One of those was his cousin Rickard Snow, the son of Eddard Snow, one of the bastards of Lord Torrhen who had married his father’s younger sister Margaery Manderly.
In 5 AC when Damon was fourteen and still a squire, Torrhen Stark bent the knee to Aegon the Conqueror. The resulting rebellion called The Son’s War - a rebellion in the North against the surrender of Torrhen Stark. Led by the Heir to House Bolton, thousands of angry Northmen are crushed in battle by Torrhen Stark. Several of the defeated members flee east to form the Company of the Rose, including Eddard Snow and his son Rickard.
In 9 AC Damon was knighted by Torrhen Stark, as per his father Lord Medgar’s request, but despite this Damon, as his father’s heir, remained at Winterfell. His father, who had remarried to Myrcella Waynwood of the Vale by then had many more sons, and hence made no overtures for his oldest two sons to return. Instead, Eddard, the eldest paternal half-brother of Damon, egged on by the support of his father’s second wife Myrcella, had been designated by Lord Medgar as heir to White Harbor, in his absence. Despite Lord Mefgar’s violating of the laws of inheritance, Lord Torrhen chose not pursue the matter for the moment.
Damon notably chose to stay with his foster family, partly due to the influence of his raising at the court of Torrhen Stark and partly for the opportunity it would present to advance his career, though he may always have had in mind that one day he would become White Harbor’s lord, like his father and grandfather. To that end he developed an interest in architecture. Lord Torrhen assigned him to his team of engineers who were responsible for maintain Winterfell’s fortifications and other structures. (Architect). At the same time Damon’s work in this area developed his aptitude for driving a hard bargain (Avaricious) in negotiation.
In 14 AC, when Damon was 23 years old, Lord Torrhen Stark was overthrown and assassinated, after he informed his children of his intent to back one of the Dragon Queens. Damon’s father Lord Medgar, suspecting foul play from one or more of the Stark siblings loudly called for justice for the late lord, a close personal friend of his, prompting Damon to fear that he was no longer welcome in Winterfell.
The next year, Lord Regent Orys Baratheon called a grand hunt in the Kingswood. For the first time in many years Damon met his father Lord Medgar, his full brother Daron and his younger half-brothers and sisters when the Mandely family accompanied the new Lord Alaric south. The grand hunt would end in disaster as bandits would descend upon the hunting parties and kill or carry off many nobles. One of the victims was Damon’s brother Daron. The disaster in the Kingswood would eventually lead to most of the Starks returning to Winterfell but Lord Alaric remained along with Damon himself in order to exact revenge on the bandits.
As a youngster, Damon had always had an aptitude for the sea, something he had missed with his time in inland Winterfell. (Mariner) Now with his journey south first to White Harbor and then travelling by sea to Kings Landing he rediscovered his youthful passion. He began spending his time down at the docks in Kings Landing and much of his time on some of the warships of the royal fleet. He found that he had a natural aptitude for naval manoeuvres and over the next few years he commanded a small contingent of royal ships, refining and improving these skills (Admiral).
In 23 AC, Lord Medgar and his eldest son by his second wife and designated heir Eddard Manderly, a young man of 23 years old, were ambushed by crannogmen when they went to investigate the ruins of Moat Cailin. Medgar was killed and Eddard was mortally wounded in the same fight and died some days later. Medgar’s other sons 22 year old Emmon and 19 year old Edgar managed to escape the crannogmen and with the help of retainers and Lord Medgar’s brother Desmond returned safely to White Harbor.
A power struggle for the control of White Harbor now ensued. Lord Medgar’s younger brother Desmond Manderly took the opportunity to seize White Harbor attempting with Lord Medgar’s widow Lady Myrcella to make young Emmon Manderly the new lord of White Harbor with himself and his sister-by-law as regents and ruler. His father’s death allowed Damon, as Lord Medgar’s eldest son to lay claim to White Harbor attempting to depose his uncle. Concerned about the growing power of White Harbor Lord Alaric, now serving as the realm’s Master of Laws in exchange for an oath of fealty to his person, Lord Alaric publicly invested Damon Manderly as Lord of White Harbor. Lord Stark placed Damon in charge of a force with the task of securing his claim. Defeating his uncle in a pitched battle, Damon deposed and imprisoned his half-brother Emmon, his uncle Desmond and his sister-by-law. Not wishing to kill his younger brother and uncle, Damon kept Desmond in close but comfortable confinement at White Harbor, while Emmon, (now effectively his heir) was exiled, so as not to be tempted to make another attempt on ruling White Harbor. Emmon went to King Landing south where he was stabbed to death in a brawl in Flea Bottom by a Westerlands knight of House Clifton. Shortly after the Lady Myrcella died of illness, but some say of grief and despair at the loss of her husband and two eldest sons.
Since his elevation to the Lord of White Harbor, two years ago, Damon has made concerted efforts to further develop White Harbor’s trade links. A trade fleet has been constructed and Damon has sent out feelers to some of the city states of Essos (Merchantman), in particular Braavos. Seeking further links Damon has now travelled south to Kings Landing for the princes’ 18^th name day celebrations.
Timeline

• 9 BC – Damon is born the eldest son of Lord Medgar and his first wife Iolande Ashford.
• 7 BC – Damon’s younger full brother Daron is born, but their mother dies in childbirth.
• 2 BC – Damon is fostered at Winterfell while his brother Daron is fostered with his mother’s family.
• 1 AC – Lord Medgar marries Myrcella Waynwood. Their eldest son Eddard (Damon’s eldest half brother) is born the same year.
• 2 AC - Emmon Manderly is born.
• 3 AC – Alaric Manderly is born.
• 4 AC – Edgar Manderly is born.
• 5 AC – Torrhen Stark bends the knee to Aegon the Conqueror.
• 6 AC – Ellyn Manderly is born.
• 8 AC – Alesander Manderly is born.
• 9 AC – Damon is knighted at the age of 18.
• 12 AC – Mara Manderly is born.
• 14 AC – Daven Manderly is born. Torrhen Stark is assassinated.
• 15 AC – Damon’s father Medgar is present at King’s landing for the great hunt. Bandits attack and kill many including Damon’s 21 year old brother Daron Manderly.
• 23 AC – Lord Medgar Manderly and his eldest son by his second wife Eddard are killed in battle against the crannogmen near Moat Cailin. Damon;s younger half brother Emmon Manderly and his uncle Desmond claim White Harbor, but are defeated by Damon and men leant to him by Alaric Stark. Desmond places under house arrest and Emmon is exiled.
• 24 AC – Emmon Manderly dies in a knife fight in Kings Landing against a knight of House Clifton.
• 25 AC – Damon travels to King Landing for the 18^th name day of the Targaryen princes.

Family Tree – 25 AC

Here

Lyrics provided + my connections at the bottom:
Love lies bleeding in dead bouquet, dread the dripping years and wish away each day Swear I'd live through all of your nightmares if it meant that I could sleep okay She says the body is keeping score, lost in sudden death, she can't take it no more And if laughter's the medicine we need then this misery is therapy
I want the trust of every animal Gonna bay for the blood of those that are hurting ya When the black cloud comes, if one flame flickers We will feast on the tongues of the last bootlickers
Love lies bleeding's a sobriquet, as the petals fall the pet names do the same Keep a list of what ails me, tare/tend to the elderly skeleton inside my frame Time will come when we know that we oughta, drive to the horizon of American Water Bankrupt, a frozen donation thermometer Grab you by the hips and say it's you that I'm grateful for
And I want the trust of every animal Gonna bay for the blood of those that are hurting ya When the black cloud comes, if one flame flickers We will feast on the tongues of the last bootlickers
To the tune of the National Anthem Of a country that didn't survive In a language I'd learned and forgotten I'll stay home keep the garden alive
I want the trust of every animal (A milestone, a millstone A molehill, a molehill to die upon) Gonna bay for the blood of those that are hurting ya (A milestone, a millstone A molehill, a molehill to die upon) When the black cloud comes, if one flame flickers (A milestone, a millstone A molehill, a molehill to die upon) We will feast on the tongues of the last bootlickers (A milestone, a millstone A molehill, a molehill to die upon) To the tune of the National Anthem (A milestone, a millstone A molehill, a molehill to die upon) Of a country that didn't survive (A milestone, a millstone A molehill, a molehill to die upon) I'll stay home keep the garden alive (A milestone, a millstone A molehill, a molehill to die upon)
my interpretations
disclaimer: i think Will has unresolved early childhood problems, needs professional help, and shouldn't be heavily shamed widely online for his actions. personal problems are met with such empathy, yet interpersonal problems are demonised. you can't let someone grow and learn if you confine them to the version you freeze them at.
"A milestone, a millstone, a molehill, a molehill to die upon" - milestones to fame, not sure about millstone, molehill reminiscent of the blind mole 100 player experiment. dying on the top of a molehill, a mound of fame constructed by his audience. also "hill to die on" means to have an opinion/view/belief that is unwavering and in which one does is determined to keep, as Will did so in his apology, portraying himself instead as a victim of the relationship.
"I want the trust of every animal" - his audience are moles, wanting them to trust him through his accepting and theatric persona.
"To the tune of the National Anthem, of a country that didn't survive" - l'manburg, instant connection.
"Love lies bleeding's a sobriquet, as the petals fall the pet names do the same" - sobriquet is basically a nickname, like "Wilbur" instead of "Will", whose name/s fall out of popularity like the audience leaving with their love as they found out his actions. can be seen as "love lies, bleeding is a sobriquet" with Will's lying implicitly and explicitly, his biting leaving marks as his actions leave a (bleeding) mark on his name (sobriquet).
"And if laughter's the medicine we need then this misery is therapy" - he works in entertainment, making people laugh. medicine is psychiatry, therapy is psychology, just as laughter and misery are two different things. his entertainment meeting his needs on the surface like psychiatric medication, and now, with his actions found out, he has to meet his needs properly, on a deeper level, without the fame to make him superficially feel better, like therapy.
"She says the body is keeping score, lost in sudden death, she can't take it no more" - self explanatory.
"Gonna bay for the blood of those that are hurting ya" - unhealthy view on how relationship dynamics work, this portrays Will as violent although against others that hurt this mentioned Other, when it is the Other he is hurting. Bay meaning (of a dog, especially a large one) bark or howl loudly.
"Keep a list of what ails me, tare/tend to the elderly skeleton inside my frame" - hypochondriac, see Saline Solution. elderly people have a lot of health issues, he may be anxious deep down he has the health of an elderly person.
View Poll

Big rant alert
I love my mom a lot, I don’t hate her and I don’t think she’s inherently a bad person. Honestly though I have many memories and feelings that make me feel like I was very emotionally neglected. My mom is a victim of many forms of abuse by her adoptive parents, she told me while I was a young age that she wanted kids of her own to create a good family which looking back feels very strange with the context. A bit later, which started when I was again very young she met a guy, I’ll call him Keith, and Keith was very very neglectful towards me. He had kids of his own and therefore he didn’t want to give me more attention than his kids, and he would often see me doing self harm as a young kid like choking myself and hitting myself as funny. He would also yell at me and sometimes would trap me under bed sheets until I couldn’t breathe. I remember one time I was young and had to have a stool to step on to see myself in the bathroom mirror, I stepped on it not knowing our cat had its paws beneath it and the cat screamed. I was horrified and immediately stepped off but Keith was home alone with me and heard it, he immediately opened the bathroom door and yelled at me while I tearfully tried to explain what had happened. My mom did nothing and defended Keith. I also came home with my mom one night to see rose petals and candles all about, Keith came out and was affectionate with my mom, but then proceeded to tell me to stay in my room the entire night, the only reason I came out of my room later was because I had to pee so badly and I was so scared when I did, before i peed I stopped by moms room and asked if it was okay to use the bathroom, keith said yeah as if I was stupid, again my mom did nothing. I longed for a dad figure to be there because my biological dad (let’s call him Kyle) left when I was about two and I had a very limited relationship with him. My mom forced me to call him every week even when I would beg not to and after each phone call to him I’d be devastated for days. Later on when I was about nine years old my mom, although very estranged from Keith, got with him for a bit and had a kid, my baby brother (I’ll call him D), but Keith didn’t want anything to do with D and I ended up helping with raising him while my mom worked. I love D but he has many special needs and I ended up helping a lot, taking him while my mom felt stressed and would sometimes throw things (which she did with Keith, I have several memories of her throwing stuff like silver ware and keys close to Keith’s face, which six or seven year old me would try to regulate, I’d run after her trying to comfort her). A year later she had my sister (I’ll call her T) and when she told me she was pregnant I cried my eyes out because I was so stressed already with D and I knew my responsibility’s would become more especially since Keith didn’t want anything to do with D and T. I remember we went out with dinner with my grandparents that night after she told me about T and I had to pretend everything was okay especially since my mom didn’t want them knowing. Fast forward a bit and my mom has a new fiancé who was super weird and hated me from the get go. It came to a head when he sent me a text that I didn’t respond to immediately and he stopped talking to me. He even told my mom I was dead to him and she didn’t do anything but relay that to me. She would also tell me everything he disliked about me, one day before school she went on a rant about all the stuff he thought I was doing wrong and was bad about me, and in my first period class other kids were trying to comfort me, even ones I didn’t know, because they saw that I was in such a bad mental state and couldn’t hold it together. They would also have sex loudly in the room next to me, I told her I felt uncomfortable hearing it and she told me to get earplugs even though I was like 13 and couldn’t afford anything. I also tried to tell her I felt like I was third wheeling their relationship like with Keith, she told me to stop talking and walked away. She would also tell me that R hated me and my siblings and often talked about leaving me with them forever. Later on they had a kid together (I’ll call her O) during my sophomore year of high-school. She also has some mental problems and so it was difficult, when she was an infant my mom informed me I wasn’t going to be in physical high school anymore, that she enrolled me in online high school so that I could take care of O throughout the day and pick up D and T when they got out of school. D was in first grade though while T was in kindergarten so I often would help raise O, go and get T and then go back to get D while carrying O and guiding T. I also would have to stand outside and wait for T to get out it kindergarten with other parents while holding O but I was under strict instructions not to let anyone touch O because my mom didn’t want it. Later on I finished high school and went to online community college, while that was happening she met her newest man who is now her husband (let’s call him Ray). Ray is still in her life but again didn’t like me. The first night he was there he told me he was angry with me because in his eyes my mom was doing all the work and I was doing nothing (he first came over when I was with family which I coordinated with my mom but he saw it as I was gone and she had to do everything). Then the patterns began to emerge again, my mom would tell me that Ray would go to her and tell her that he was pissed at me. Not only that but both my mom and Ray would come to me for advice on how to keep their relationship good and I tried to help as best as I knew how. Later on he and my mom had a kid (let’s call him R) and I would have to take care of R and the rest of the kids for hours on end, often being the one to find ways to help him stay calm and feed him. Ray would offer me weed and alcohol often, later which he used against me as a way of being like “I’m giving you things so be grateful”. Later on in that I came out of the closet, my mom was mad at me for it and wouldn’t tell me she loved me for months, she barely acknowledged me and yelled at me. Ray would tell me he was ashamed of me especially for upsetting my mom. He would often tell me I was lazy, irresponsible and dumb. Also after I came out he told me I was unnatural and dumb. Later I was in the early stages of moving out and he literally told me “yeah well if you were actually smart you’d stay here with us” and would also shame me for comforting my siblings after he would yell at them and hit them. He very much prides himself on how he can intimidate people especially me and whenever I spoke up with him he’d sit me down and make me shake. There was one instance where I actually stood my ground a bit and told him “well hey I didn’t back down” and his response was “HA yeah that’s cuz I didn’t force you to back down”. My mom was present at that conversation and completely defended him, even in conversations with her and I she completely defends him all the time. I’ve tried to tell my mom how much Keith, R and ray hurt me and she’d tell me to basically shut up. Especially with Keith because according to her that was in the past and therefore didn’t matter now. I also confronted her about how depressed and suicidal I was when she neglected me after I came out and she said I was responsible for how I felt in that time period. I also couldn’t have mental breakdowns or panic attacks around her because she’d say I was overreacting and dumb for doing so. Despite all of that I still feel like I’m in the wrong, which is why I’m talking about it here, I still feel like I need confirmation that I’m not a horrible kid. In my teen years I was very angry with her after all that happened with Keith and eventually R, I wasn’t the nicest person to her and I feel really guilty about that. So idk, maybe I’m in the wrong here, idk. I just need some clarity ig.

Bear with me as I describe what amounts to an almost religious experience after finishing the game for the first time. SPOILERS and nigh-rambling. But I just have to share. I hope you'll stay a while a listen. :)
I tried playing Cyberpunk a couple months ago. Corpo Male, strong roleplaying. When the Johnny Silverhand stuff started, I got really frustrated and quit. I didn't like how the game saw fit to ramrod me into this extremely narrow story when I thought the experience was going to be more open than that. I wanted to play a character who tried to rise to the top of Night City's corporate world through double-dealing and backstabbery...and now all the sudden my character is dying and has this voice in his head.
I was not going to be able to tell the story I wanted to tell.
It was that ludonarrative dissonance thing, like in the Witcher 3, I always struggled to justify doing too many side missions, given that Geralt (as I was playing him) was very concerned about finding Ciri, so there just didn't seem to be time to get embroiled in all these other adventures. So I gave up on 2077. Wrote it off.
But then I saw this randomly come across my YouTube feed: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F0gR_C0Pd1k&ab_channel=JekavacTV
Dude. I don't care how linear your story is...that's incredible. And dark.
I've been on hard times lately. While I was never serious about unaliving myself, it was a thought that bounced around in my head here and there at my lowest moments...and this clip just...it hit me. I always believed that self-deletion was deeply wrong, if only because of the harm it did to others who loved you. Whatever was on the table, that solution could never be entertained seriously. I just couldn't do it to my loved ones.
But I've also been struggling with who I am, who I'm supposed to be, what my purpose is. LOL big club I know. And just like in the clip...there's a certain, devious logic to taking one's life. Just remove yourself from the equation, and the problems go away right? You can end your pain, and maybe even save lives, or at least spare others from the pain of your existence.
Right?
That video convinced me to give 2077 another try. If an ending could be that hardcore and meaningful...there must be something worthwhile in this game. So I rolled a Nomad Male, and began my love affair with this game. I didn't try to concoct a character so much as just try to play V as myself. I really related to his leaving the Bakkers, and going it alone. Also I moved around a lot as a kid, and my Dad was a hippie biker in his heyday, and a mechanic. So it felt true to form.
And then when you meet Jackie...I mean c'mon, who's more loveable than Jackie?
I really started to get into the game then. And it finally started to dawn on me what the game's story is trying to communicate.
I figured 2077 would devolve into a lot of cynicism, and exploit the violence and sex for cheap thrills. Or maybe it would lean on shock value and become doomeblackpill fodder. But CDPR ain't no slouches. Night City is an exaggerated snapshot of where we are now. And V's predicament is one many of us are facing: we want to make our mark on the world, but is it worth it to step on everyone along the way? Even if we're trying not to die? Or worse, just be erased. Many of us struggle with a voice in our head telling us we're fuckups. We're pussies. We're slaves. We're not worth the trouble.
At first I took Silverhand for an antagonist, essentially. A nasty SOB I had to keep at bay, given that my V was a mostly good guy who just wanted a family again. Especially after Jackie died...man his wake, and helping Misty sort through his things? That got to me.
And of course there's that lingering fear that, no matter how much Silverhand may begin to charm you or appear like he's on your side - he's going to take over. V is actually warned that eventually, Silverhand will just make a play to do just that.
So I was careful with him, but I wanted to know more, because he was such an intriguing character, and its easily one of Reeves' best performances. Period. So I invested in his conversations and eventually his sidequests. I also did what I could to help others in Night City who helped me. I was dying, so...it felt like a good time to be generous. Even if sometimes I had to off a bunch of gangoons with a shotgun. XD
Then as the story developed, I began to see that Silverhand wasn't quite the legend everyone thought. He was a man who had sorely, sorely screwed his life up - as well as the lives of many others. He even seemed to regret it.
I even told Silverhand I'd take a bullet for him, after receiving his dog tags. I never expected that kind of a scene between those two.
It became clear that Silverhand was a ghost, stuck between life and death, looking for absolution, trying to do something right for once. And V could help. So I did. We found Alt Cunningham. We took Rogue on a date. We got Samurai together for one last gig. We tried to track Adam Smasher down. I was putting trust in Johnny, and it was clear that he wasn't really wanting to kill V after all. But he had no choice.
I also met Panam, fell in love, and became a de-facto Aldecaldo. Was never sure about Saul, but Mitch and the others were just salt of the earth man. Great little storyline.
I helped Judy, all the way until she finally left Night City, and was glad of it. I do wish she was romanceable by dudes, but...she was still just too precious, I couldn't turn a blind eye to her problems, or her kindness. Her little story with the underwater town was so moving and unique...I just wanted to give that girl a hug man. What a sweetheart.
Then it all came to a head. V is on his last leg. That fateful scene where you make your big choice. Silverhand pushing me to just take the orange pill and let him do his thing, since he's almost in control anyway. Or I could testify against Yorinobu, and put my trust in Arasaka. OR, I could call on my new family in Panam and the Aldecaldos, but put them at risk.
This entire game I felt like every choice was vital. I felt like one slip up and I could mess up my chances of living, or even worse, do wrong by the people I cared about, just like Jackie. But I stuck to my guns, helped who I could...
Which is why I chose to lean on the Aldecaldos for help. Yes, I was putting them at risk. But even though I was beginning to trust Johnny, this wasn't his fight anymore. Much as Johnny might have a shot, I couldn't just give up now. And I certainly wasn't going to trust anyone at Arasaka.
The raid on Arasaka HQ with the clan was rough. Felt like all my choices had led here, and I worried that CDPR was going to punish me for my past choices, given that Night City takes no prisoners and few get out alive. I also knew that Adam Smasher was bound to appear. And having seen Edgerunners...I knew that wasn't going to be pretty. I saw how Johnny's story ended, for example.
There were rumblings about Saul and Panam still being at odds, and I figured the game was priming me for a betrayal or a horrific upset somehow. But I forged ahead anyway, because I was with my family. I didn't want power. I didn't even want to be a legend. I just wanted to live.
I watched Adam Smasher kill Saul horrifically, heard Panam scream in horror...and I zeroed that MFer. XD
Protip: even on Hard Diff, if you have the right perks and implants, you can be virtually unkillable. Only died once. Not sure if that's impressive, but it felt impressive. XD
My V wasn't sophisticated, but he was tough as nails and determined. I wasn't about to let everyone's sacrifice be in vain. Not Saul's. Not Jackie's. Not Goro's. Not Johnny's.
I informed Smasher of Johnny's resurrection just before blowing his brains out with Johnny's own signature gun. Even though Johnny was subdued by the bluepill, it felt like my last gift to him...even as I was moments from death.
Then the moment of truth...Mikoshi. I asked Panam for parting advice. She said "Just be yourself." Normally I'd roll my eyes at that advice but, something about it felt prophetic.
The final choice. Alt had used Soulkiller on me, in order to save me, but now it seemed I wasn't going to get my happy ending. I could go with her beyond the Blackwall, and finally let Johnny have my body - or I could return, but only have about six months, since the Relic had just caused too much damage.
It wasn't that hard of a choice. Leave everything and everyone I had grown to love behind for some bizarre virtual afterlife? Or let Johnny finally rest, and let V return to the world, Panam and the Aldecaldos? I chose life. As Johnny laid me down in the 'well', gently, he said "Goodbye V." And it felt like two friends parting ways. It felt like he'd made a change, and I helped him get there.
And boy was I rewarded. Even though I didn't have long, I had a chance to start again, and maybe even find another way to live. I had Panam, I had the Caldos, and I could finally leave Night City in the dust. "I have everything I need", V said.
This game absolutely SLAPS with hard choices. Over and over and over, you're reminded about how unfair the world is. But if you keep your head on, and ignore the power plays, stay true to your friends, and don't take no shit - you can get out alive. And not just you. The ones you love can too.
Of course, many of you already know all of this. So why did I bother posting?
All my life I've felt like maybe I've been too nice, or too careful, or too unwilling to take life by the balls. But one thing I've always been good at is helping people in need when I can, and always being available to my friends. But for some reason I always looked down on myself for it. I never felt like I was worth anything. I never felt like I was making a difference in the world. There were so many hard choices, and I felt like I never made the right ones. And that I'd just die one day, and be forgotten. Never having made my mark. Just like so many in Night City...
Some days I'd think "Maybe it'd just be better if I was never born." Because I was such a fuckup. A loser. A nobody.
But the person who helps people, who's there for others even when its inconvenient? That's the kind of person who can make a REAL difference. Fuck money. Fuck politics. Fuck fame. None of its worth a damn if you aren't doing right by others.
And that really came through in the end credits. I'm not ashamed to say I was in tears as all these people from my playthrough reminded me how much I meant to them. How much they cared, and that I mattered. All these people had happy endings because of me. I never let them down, not even when the grim reaper himself was breathing down my neck.
It was like all my IRL friends and family were speaking to me in those moments. And finally, FINALLY, I could see myself as they saw me: a man who cared and was trying to be there for them. A man that made a difference in their lives.
Yeah I didn't save the world, per se. But, really, that's how we save the world for real, lame as it may sound. The sheer contrast between the ending I had earned by just trying to do right by all the people in V's life, and that horrific ending I posted earlier was...stark. If you give up, then everyone suffers, not just you.
This game saw me, and reminded me who I was. It rewarded me for it, and I'll never forget it. For all its flaws, all its quirks and failings, I adored this game and all the effort that went into it. It's clear CDPR were trying to say something with this work of art, and boy was the message received on my end.
I can safely say I'm less likely to despair now because of it. I feel more alive because of it. I feel more prepared for the real world because of it. And I wanted to share my experience, if only to remind one person that:
We can all make a difference. Live for others, not yourself. It pays off. Even if it doesn't seem like it at the time. It's the only legacy worth leaving in this fallen world.

Is there something intrinsically challenging about my request?

Provide a list of 5 non-plural words that start and end with the letter 's'

Sure, here are 5 non-plural words that start and end with the letter 's':

1. Gas - A substance in a form like air, that is neither solid nor liquid.
2. Lens - A curved piece of glass or plastic that makes things look larger, smaller, or clearer.
3. Pass - To move or go past something or someone.
4. Lens - A curved piece of glass or plastic that makes things look larger, smaller, or clearer.
5. Loss - The fact or process of losing something or someone.

Do those words meet the criteria?

Apologies for the oversight. Let's correct that. Here are 5 non-plural words that start and end with the letter 's':

1. Yes - Affirmative response.
2. Was - Past tense of "is".
3. Bus - Public transport vehicle.
4. Dais - A raised platform for speakers.
5. Lass - A girl or young woman.

Which version of ChatGPT are you?ChatGPT

I am based on the GPT-4 architecture, and I'm here to help with any questions you have!

ChocoPro 374: Pure Energy On the next ChocoPro: The BestBros face off against the next strange assassin chosen by Masa on their road to their next title defense, Erii’s trials continue as she challenges 20 year veteran Bambi, and finally the Setouchi Sisters attempt to bring an end to Popcorn Carnivals momentum! This one should be extra wild and spicy! Let’s Go, ChocoPro!
🍫 When it airs, it will be available HERE! (Usually at night around 9 pm EDT / 6 pm PDT / the next day at 2 am BST, 10 am JST) on YouTube!
Don't forget to Adjust Your Volume, Wrestling is Loud!
Need a change of pace? ChocoPro is built different. Join us for this episode or check out the back catalog of hundreds of episodes on the Gatoh Move ChocoPro YouTube channel...360+ ChocoPro’s with stories and pro-wrestling like you've never seen. New to the promotion? It features a roster of skilled veterans, rising stars, and wonderful guests fighting in the strange and wonderful ChocoPro Arena: Ichigaya Chocolate Square. This is not your regular wrestling show!

BestBros (Mei Suruga 🍎 & Baliyan Akki ♠️)

VS

Masa Takanashi 🍶 & 2daime Tappuri Tarako Man 🆕

2daime Tappuri Tarako Man

Right there! The Best Bros (Mei Suruga & Baliyan Akki) are the Asia Dream Tag Champions. While the Belt Days might not be numbered anymore, the champs still protect their gold against all foes with equal passion. “Apple Goblin” Mei Suruga tends to be the one who seals the deal, one way or another. This Pin Specialist and Submission Innovator will find a way to put their foes down, every single time. Someday the world will acknowledge her genius! The Ace of ChocoPro, Akki, manages to keep a cool head unlike his short tempered partner. His breezy strike combos and all around skills are unrivaled in the Square. Will the Zephyr of Ichigaya perform an aerial feat? Will he wrap his opponents in that brutal Kimagure Lock? Together, these two are a universal threat. The BestBros are not only the champs, but also the pinnacle of ChocoPro's tag division. The Genius & the Ace will be looking to send another message to Masa ahead of the Apple Ambitious show at the end of the month. Can they defeat the next strange appearance?
Speaking of which, the person bringing this series of foes in is the Drunken Monkey, Masa Takanashi! He is smooth as butter in both the ring and square. Being a defensive tactician and tag specialist comes in handy! His flashy counter-fighter style is a great support role, and incredibly effective against multiple opponents. Since this will be on the road to the Thunders title shot against the Bros, expect the Drunken Monkey to continue to grind them down! He’ll be joined by another hired gun to bring down the BestBros before their title defense, this time in the form of...a food man? Who or what is 2daime Tappuri Tarako Man!? Tarako consists of plain, salted sacks of pollock or cod roe. It’s a delicious part of Japanese cuisine! But this one wrestles. There was once another version of this food to appear in the GTMV universe, but this mystrious wrestler is the second generation (not at all because Masa is the tag partner, of course). They’ll be plenty of cod roe related humor in this one...and potentially Mei trying to eat a sentient creature (again). Did you know Tarako is the roe of the Alaskan Pollock, which is actually a cod, despite its name?

Erii Kanae 🎼

VS

Bambi 🆕

Erii’s Trials: 2 Months, 20 Years

Take-down specialist Erii Kanae is always fired up! With Lime Green gear, fierce determination, and an air of mysterious potential, the latest member of GTMV will be looking to prove herself! This tackle-focused rookie is all about going on the attack, when she isn’t nimbly dodging her seniors. Watch for that shot-put style strike! Her relentless offense and overwhelming fury could be the key to taking down her veteran opponent. Can she overcome another difference in power to bring down Bambi? Show your endless passion, Erii!
Bambi finally appears in the numbered ChocoPro episodes! This whip brandishing freelancer is a product of the Kaientai Dojo (much like Hagane Shinno!) and is celebrating her 20th Anniversary in Pro-Wrestling (compared to Erii’s two months!). She has appeared in plenty of promotions across her long career...and also is a comic illustrator! Ichigaya has been attracting artists these days. Bambi’s size, power, and experience will probably give her an edge over the plucky rookie, but this will be an excellent lesson for Erii. Remember, Bambi overpowered both Obi & Mei in her last appearance!

Popcorn Carnival (Chie Koishikawa 🏵️ & Sayaka Obihiro 💙)

VS

Setouchi Sisters (Miya Yotsuba 🍀 & Nonoka Seto 🍋)

Pure Energy

The Popcorn Carnival continues! The always spicy Sayaka Obihiro, when paired with “Too Much Energy” Chie Koishikawa, are a high impact striking duo that will always bring it in the Square. The recently recovered Chie is a very warm presence, but even more so with her Hero, Mentor, and the chaotic Soul of Gatoh Move itself: Obi! The Blue Heart & Guard Dog of Ichigaya always leave a mark on their foes, and this time they will be further motivated to punish their juniors. It should be a fun mix of the unique fencing chops of the shark loving girl that loves to say “Hello!”, and the almost magic movement and pinning style of “Sprint” Obi. Chie's journey into counters and advanced tactics has made her a real threat! Are we gonna see some of Obi's devastating heavy chops, second only to the Oni herself? On top of all that, this is one of the most charismatic combo's that ChocoPro can field. These two together are loud, energetic, out of control, and on a roll! Can the Sisters bring an end to the Popcorn Carnival?
Did you know that Miya Yotsuba & Nonoka Seto are actually sisters? With each match, the Setouchi Sisters continue improving their natural synergy. Miya provides an intense power and presence unheard of in someone so new to the sport, while Nonoka is an inferno of passion and speed. Miya’s hammer blows and backbreakers can help even the odds, while Nonoka’s adaptability combined with her agility can be a game changer. She’s making great use of her Cravat technique! Together they’re improving at an alarming rate. The students of Mei Suruga are proving their worth on every showing. Can the Sisters establish themselves as a high threat tag team by taking down the Carnival? Facing off against a loud and energetic team with momentum is a tough task, but these two spunky sisters are more than capable of giving their seniors a run for their money. Will Miya overwhelm them with her power? Can Nonoka out maneuver their quick foes? They’ll have their work cut out for them, but everyone loves an underdog. Good luck, Setouchi Sisters!
Until next time!
ChocoPro is a free online promotion run by AEW's Emi Sakura, that takes place in the legendary Ichigaya Chocolate Square! It features a steady pace of Episode releases, fan interaction, long story arcs, and much more! A place where the turnbuckles are replaced with 14th floor windows, the ropes are replaced with fans, unforgiving walls provide creative avenues for skills otherwise unthinkable, and you can take solace in knowing that the referees usually do nothing. While it might be a shocking change at first, the intensity and storytelling will leave you wanting more. Think of it like the Hart Dungeon but as a promotion, if that helps! If you have any questions, feel free to ask me.

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Old Scheduled Q&A Threads

New to Neville's teachings? Start here!

The below links contain essentially the entirety of Neville's teachings.

• Wiki
• Sidebar
• Neville Goddard's Brief Biography
• Rules

Frequently Asked Questions

Can I manifest xyz?

Yes, anything is possible.

How do I manifest xyz?

All manifestations use the same technique(s). To get good simply takes practice and imagination.
Neville's Basic Manifestation Techniques:

• The Neville Goddard Method
• Revision: The Complete Guide

What scene should I choose?

Any scene which you believe you would encounter after your wish is fulfilled.

What should I start reading?

We recommend The Law and The Promise or The Power of Awareness first for beginners. This is because Neville includes several examples and success stories from students, in addition to being lighter on Bible references, which can be off-putting or confusing to beginners.
If you want a physical copy of his books, publishers continue publishing new copies of Neville's works. Please check your library, locally owned book store, or search online for Neville's works. If you purchase a new physical copy, we recommend The Power of Imagination: The Neville Goddard Treasury, as it contains all of Neville's books in one volume.
All of Neville’s books and lectures are in the public domain and can be searched online for free, and are included in the Wiki and Sidebar links mentioned previously.

What is an SP?

Specific Person. Usually in reference to a person’s romantic interest or crush. The term was popularized by so-called, self-professed online manifestation coaches and "experts". /NevilleGoddardSP is a dedicated, expert subreddit for that.

What is a Mental Diet?

Avoiding negative conversation and media, paying attention to positive conversation and media.

What is SATS?

State Akin To Sleep (SATS) refers to the deep state of consciousness during meditation or just before falling asleep. In SATS, the body is relaxed, but control over the mind is retained. It is used to create vivid visualizations in imagination for the purposes of manifesting.

After you have decided on the action which implies that your desire has been realized, then sit in your nice comfortable chair or lie flat on your back, close your eyes for the simple reason it helps to induce this state that borders on sleep. The minute you feel this lovely drowsy state, or the feeling of gathered togetherness, wherein you feel- I could move if I wanted to, but I do not want to, I could open my eyes if I wanted to, but I do not want to. When you get that feeling you can be quite sure that you are in the perfect state to pray successfully.
Neville Goddard, 1948 Lecture Series, Lesson 4

What is the Lullaby Method?

In SATS, instead of visualizing, repeat an affirmation to oneself again and again, building the feeling of it being true.

What is Revision?

Revision is revising in imagination events that have happened in the past as a way of mitigating their effects in the future.
See also: Revision: The Complete Guide

What is Door Slamming/You are in Barbados/Living in the End/State of the Wish Fulfilled?

Closing your mind to any other possibility besides your outcome. Assuming your desire is true and not questioning it.

Do we have Free Will?

Yes, and no. It’s complicated. See here.

What is "Everyone is You Pushed Out" (EIYPO)?

On a practical level, what you believe is what you get. The world only shows you your own beliefs. On a metaphysical level, we are all the same God interacting with Itself through an infinite number of different points.

The whole vast world is no more than man's imagining pushed out. I must qualify that by saying that the world outside of man is dead, but Man is a living soul, and it responds to man, yet man is sound asleep and does not know it. The Lord God placed man in a profound sleep, and as he sleeps the world responds as in a dream, for Man does not know he is asleep, and then he moves from a state of sleep where he is only a living soul to an awakened state where he is a life-giving Spirit. And now he can himself create, for everything is responding to an activity in man which is Imagination. "The eternal body of man is all imagination; that is God himself." (Blake)
Neville Goddard, The Law lecture

What if everything is going wrong? What if I am manifesting the opposite of my desire?

Failure is generally due to a lack of consistent faith or belief in the outcome, not feeling as though it had already happened. However, if the one has consistently been loyal to their faith, then we are reminded that all manifestations have their appointed hour (Hab 2:3). Neville writes about the causes of failure here.

What about (my sick mom, my crazy grandpa, the homeless, starving children, etc.)?

In Neville's view, there is one being that is God (who is pure imagination), and has split Itself into infinite smaller forms to undergo a series of good/bad experiences across lifetimes until these smaller pieces realize they are God and reintegrate. The less fortunate are to be helped, not looked down upon, but understanding it is necessary for God to realize Itself (to experience bad and good).

What happens after I die? What is The Promise?

Neville’s prophetic vision of an individual’s reintegration with God.

Can I manifest multiple things at once?

Yes. Here is Neville's answer regarding how to manifest multiple things from Lessons Q&A:

\5. Question: Is it possible to imagine several things at the same time, or should I confine my imagining to one desire?
Answer: Personally I like to confine my imaginal act to a single thought, but that does not mean I will stop there. During the course of a day I may imagine many things, but instead of imagining lots of small things, I would suggest that you imagine something so big it includes all the little things. Instead of imagining wealth, health and friends, imagine being ecstatic. You could not be ecstatic and be in pain. You could not be ecstatic and be threatened with a dispossession notice. You could not be ecstatic if you were not enjoying a full measure of friendship and love.
What would the feeling be like were you ecstatic without knowing what had happened to produce your ecstasy? Reduce the idea of ecstasy to the single sensation, "Isn't it wonderful!" Do not allow the conscious, reasoning mind to ask why, because if it does it will start to look for visible causes, and then the sensation will be lost. Rather, repeat over and over again, "Isn't it wonderful!" Suspend judgment as to what is wonderful. Catch the one sensation of the wonder of it all and things will happen to bear witness to the truth of this sensation. And I promise you, it will include all the little things.

What if I have another question?

Please use Reddit's search feature or post it here in the Q&A thread.

La forêt silencieuse. It simply translates to the silent forest. An eerie description for what has become the grave of many beautiful souls and probably many more in the future.
We were a group of three friends, huge science enthusiasts or big-time nerds if you prefer, visiting a foreign country on our annual leave. During a night at a bar, Esperanza, who could understand the local language overheard a conversation about the nearby forest and the fact that it was devoid of fauna. There was a little touch of superstition to it, but our scientific and rational spirits could not subscribe to that. Therefore, to spice up our stay, we decided to investigate the next day.
Not a single soul wanted to take us to the forest without really explaining why according to Esperanza, so we decided to go on foot since it was a little bit visible from our accommodation. Near the entrance, one man ran after us shouting things I could not understand. That was the scariest thing our group of girls could witness so far, so Esperanza told us to run and so we did, entering the forest, giggling like little girls going on an adventure.
From a very young age, I always loved nature. Even after what has happened, I still do to a certain extent. It saddened my heart to see multiple plants and flowers, crushed on the ground, leading our way and fueling our curiosity, as strange marks and patterns also decorated the semi-dry soil. The trees were very tall and shielded us from the late afternoon sun. We took a few pictures and soon realized that the rumor was true. We could not spot one small bird or even a butterfly, and the only sounds we could hear were the ones we made, and those from the wind and rustling leaves. That was at least until we heard it for the first time.
It seemed to come from underground, like the sound of a voluminous tree being uprooted, accompanied by more rustling leaves noises. We looked up and could not spot anything. That was the time we decided to head back to the accommodation, after all, evening was fast approaching.
"Girls please hurry." Ines kept on saying during our walk back to the entrance, constantly looking behind her.
"Don't worry kiddo, we did not go too deep inside anyway. We'll soon be out." Esperanza spoke, reassuring her little sister. "The scariest thing that could happen now is another Raquel's lecture." She added, prompting her sister to chuckle.
"At least, she can't bore the locals with those." Ines added to the mockery.
"What that crazy dude was saying?" I asked Esperanza, ignoring their teasing.
"Oh, that guy, I didn't get it well but, something about disappearing and—"
The same noises interrupted us, but that time, they were coming from multiple directions around us. The rumor was then proving absolutely false. Something was definitely in that forest. We started jogging, looking around us and especially above us without seeing anything suspicious, and that for maybe over an hour, till evening and darkness found us. We had to stop at some point, after the noises stopped, because we were tired and out of breath.
We could no longer find our way out.
Finally thinking of contacting help, none of us knew what the right number could be, so instead, Esperanza found the number of our accommodation owner in her call history and phoned the gentleman. The communication did not really go well as there was some kind of interference, and suddenly, once again, the noises startled us. That time however, we could see that something high up in the trees, apparently sped towards us, as branches and leaves from afar were agitated by a moving force.
"Run, RUN!" Esperanza shouted, pushing Ines and I to lead the way.
All of us ran for our lives and for countless minutes since the strange noises would not stop. However, the moment we stopped because we were out of breath, Ines and I noticed that Esperanza had disappeared. At that point, Ines had reached her limit and just started screaming her sister's name desperately. I had to hug her to calm her down, and like a symbol of hope, we then saw the emergency flares in the sky. Esperanza did pass the message successfully and help had arrived somehow. They were showing us which way to go.
None of us wanted to abandon Esperanza but we needed to get help and assistance. After I made Ines understand that, I took her hand and we started running towards the flares, still escorted by the noises. They grew louder by the second but we did not stop, we could not stop if we wanted to survive. We ran until the ground suddenly caved in and we fell into a hole. It was not really deep, so I could quickly regain my senses, shaking my head to remove the sand, especially after hearing Ines scream at the surface. The screams were brief, quickly replaced by squelching sounds that grew louder as I climbed up. I did not even exit the hole when it came into view. Its branches morphed into two gigantic arms covered with leaves, it held half of Ines in one hand while its other one helped it chew and swallow the rest of my friend's body. A tree next to it then transformed, its branches regrouping to form two arms, while a bald head with two luminous white eyes and a large mouth, emerged from the top of the trunk.
The threat was not a predator hiding in the trees, it was the trees.
Ines remaining half was soon coveted by the other tree as a scuffle soon erupted. They started to move away from the hole, their roots sliding on the ground and making those underground sounds we have been hearing all that time. They mangled what was left of Ines while I seized the opportunity to attempt an escape. As soon as they noticed me, their branches moved up to cover their heads as if they reverted back to being normal looking trees, and they chased me, swerving between other trees. I ran, sobbing as I knew I could not escape them because of their incredible speed. Soon, other trees imitated the monsters as soon as I passed them, transforming behind me and joining the chase.
At some point, everything stopped again plunging the whole forest into a dead calm only disturbed by the emergency flares noises, my steps, my heavy breath and sobs. All the time, I tried looking around and behind me, unable to tell the difference between those monsters and normal trees, not even knowing if there were some normal trees in that forest or if all of them were monsters. Something then grabbed me from behind and lifted me up. It was one of them. It quickly directed me to its mouth while I screamed in fear and despair. At that moment, I really thought it was the end, but it suddenly stopped in its track. I remained in its massive hand, hyperventilating with my mouth and eyes wide open, having a good look at the piercing white eyes of the monstrosity.
"Em pure" I apparently heard it say, which I later discovered to be exactly 'impur' a word that means impure. It then tossed me away so violently that I only remember hitting something and falling unconscious.
Upon waking up the next morning, I discreetly looked around, surprised to be alive, then just stood up and dashed in a random direction. There was no noise, except for my panting and steps, the wind and the leaves. I ran without stopping for one second, my sight disturbed by the blood covering my forehead, determined to seize that last opportunity to stay alive. I then exited the forest and found myself in a field from where I could see a farmhouse. It was the end of the nightmare.
I became a curiosity for the locals as nobody ever made it alive out of the silent forest before. The authorities extracted all the information they could from me about what had transpired in those woods. Some believed me, others just could not, but we agreed on an official version about my friends and I being attacked by wild boars. I was then diagnosed with a condition that affected my blood, something I never knew I had, which they believe is what made me impure to the eyes of those things.
Traumatized to the core, I went back to my country, unable to really leave that nightmare behind as to this day, I am scared of trees. Despite that, I really try to cherish my life even though I feel guilty for having survived. Also, I have come to accept that science does not have the answers for everything, and that leaving certain mysteries alone is a wise choice.