How can i see a blocked facebook profile

i am for last few days watching again the show. it is first time i was watching from first moment in very long time
i see that i am wrong about hermen... i think i am very wrong to call him a bad person and to say he is not caring and everyone hates him... and all these words i have said
i still think he is a bit crazy and sometimes he is saying words im not agreeing with... but he is not bad person like i was saying before
and i was wrong to say bad things of his actor. i see now that actor is not fault of his character... and i have heard sad story about the actor real life few days ago on this sub and i am wrong to judge him all because i did not like a fake character
but i am vert wrong, hermen is not bad and i amb also sorry for saying he is too sensitive and crying too much... it is still my opinion that he is sensitive but i am sorry for saying he is wrong to be sensitive and to cry for children victims..m that is fault of how i grow up not fault of other persons.
i am sorry i hope i can be forgived and to continue to be here...

My parent thinks they're autistic because of videos they sees online. They spend most of their time online. However, when I brought up my own symptoms and how I wanted to be diagnosed, they dismissed me and said that they don't think I am autistic. Today, my parent just told me that they wanted to get diagnosed but the waiting list is 2 years long. The symptoms they shared with me about their own "autism" are literally basic behaviors and aren't to the extent of a diagnosis. I'm afraid that I'm letting my mommy/daddy issues fuel ableism. And I really don't want to feel ableist.
I have mommy/daddy issues because I felt emotionally abandoned by them as a kid. Every time I had an issue emotionally, they put the focus on themself or dismissed me. Every time I was sick, they were sicker. I was punished for exhibiting my autistic behaviors unless they were positive, like reading a ton about animal behavior. Their expectations were wishy washy, and I never felt like I was good enough.
They have gotten better as I've grown up, but that inner child reaction is still there. Every time they bring up autism, I freeze and want to run away or I feel incredibly angry. My first internal reaction is "YOU think you're autistic? You punished me for this behavior and now you want me to give you attention for it? You dismissed my problems and now you want them?"
How can I get away from this reaction? 😭

Well as my title implies, my(24F) boyfriend(24M) of three years says that we don’t spend as much time together, which is fair. We don’t currently live together as neither of us make enough money to comfortably live paying rent, groceries, utilities, car & gas bills, etc. I’m also about to do an unpaid internship so I’ll be making less money. I am currently working full time and in graduate school online. He also works full time and recently got a new job with a different schedule. Because we both work, our hang out time is usually limited to the evenings. I’ll come home from work, grab some stuff to bring to his house, and then come over and spend time until around 10 when I have to leave so I can get ready for bed in time for work. We usually spend our time at his house primarily because of his allergies (I have 2 cats and a dog) but he does come over sometimes. We do this every weekday except for one, where he has band practice. On Saturdays, I have d&d with my friends at 4:00 and on Sundays I go to church w my parents and grandma. I’ve been going to church less lately but still go sometimes to help drive my grandma home or do volunteer work.
So I end up usually spending Saturday mornings/afternoons with my boyfriend until I have d&d.
Some context: last Saturday I had to leave my house early (he was sleeping over) because I had completely forgotten I had to go to a memorial service that day. He was understandably upset that I randomly cut our time short and I felt really shitty about it. This Saturday, my friends wanted to meet up earlier and get ice cream/shaved ice before our game since some of the group wouldn’t be able to make it. We’re all really close and d&d on Saturdays is the only time we really see eachother. So I figured it would be okay with my boyfriend if this one time I hung out with my friends a little earlier. I even invited him to come with me.
He got really upset and said that we never spend time together and that he never gets to see me anymore and when he does it’s only for a few hours. I told him that I actually do push aside a lot of other things so I can spend more time with him. I have said no to friend hangouts, protests, gatherings and other random stuff so that he and I could spend time together. I put off chores and homework so I can spend more time with him after work. He didn’t seem to understand and he just kept saying “all I want is to spend time with you”. I ended up saying that I’d cancel on my friends and that I was sorry. I genuinely didn’t think it would be that big of a deal.
But he said that this is the second Saturday in a row we couldn’t hang out for the majority of the day and he told me he never gets to see me anymore. This situation is stressing me out. I feel like o never have time to do any of the things I want to do, even chores, and if I do I feel bad because I know he’ll be hurt or upset. At the same time, I want to honor his feelings too and help him feel like we’re spending more time together but I don’t know how to do that on top of what I’m already doing. Does anyone have any advice?
TL;DR: Boyfriend feels that we don’t spend enough time together. I feel like i can never do any of my own things that I want to do because of work, school & hanging out with him every day. Advice appreciated.

This will hopefully be my last post on this sub for a long time, but I’ve been using this place to vent about my toxic situation for a while so I figured I might as well post how everything concluded and what happened when I left. I’m going to reflect on everything and recap the important parts so no one has to read 3 posts.
It all started when I decided to start DMing to keep in touch with some college friends after graduation. During my first campaign, one of the players, Pirate, asked if his friend, Colorado, could join. I didn't really know Colorado, but I figured, "the more, the merrier."
Colorado had some issues early on, giving unsolicited advice to everyone on how to play and viewing newer or shy players as “side characters”. However, he frequently missed sessions, only showing up for less than half of them for the first few years so nothing came to a head early on. Then, Colorado decided he wanted to bring back his tabletop campaign from his college days and started trying to recruit players after my sessions. Pirate suggested I join the campaign, promising that Colorado was a better DM than player. Since I had been the Forever DM up to that point, I agreed to give it a go.
I created a character who was part of the royal family but enjoyed interacting with commoners in the slums, even having a secret girlfriend from that background. After that, Colorado also started hitting me up to help with the campaign. I ended up photoshopping character art for a bunch of his NPCs and I even drew his world map for him. I didn't mind doing it, as I do that kind of stuff for fun.
For our first session, Colorado had already created character sheets for us based on our backstories, but only he could see them. Colorado would also roll all the dice himself so “all we had to focus on is roleplaying”. We played one on one in different "scenes" that could last around 30 minutes to an hour each. We usually had around 2 to 4 scenes per session, depending on what Colorado thought was important. During the game, Colorado asked us to write down quotes from him and the other players when it wasn't our turn.
I had to wait for well over an hour before I could finally play. My first session was on rails. I mostly just had to repeat after Colorado during a ceremony. Afterwards, I got to sneak out of the castle and meet with my commoner girlfriend, but Colorado immediately had her break up with me. Then I was told that I had to leave the city. I was essentially locked out of my hanging out in the slums and commoner girlfriend subplots. NPCs generally disliked my morally good character, especially my sister who was depicted as purely evil towards me. Despite my efforts to mend the relationship, she never changed her mind and Colorado never rolled any dice to determine that. Later Colorado revealed to me the character was based on his ex-girlfriend, who was originally intended to be the player character from my country before they broke up.
Eventually, I finally got to interact with another player, Soldier, who I had really good chemistry with and we had a really fun scene. Which Colorado exclaimed, “See! This is why I keep you apart. It makes these moments so much more epic!” But I’m just thinking that if we were in a party, every session could be this epic.
Then Colorado got busy. He went to some alternative medicine nature retreat and didn’t pay his rent the whole time he was gone so he got evicted. At that point, the campaign went on hiatus as people got busy and Colorado was couch hopping. It was during that time I considered the campaign over and made my first post because I thought it fit the sub. Then a year after the last session, Colorado started trying to organize the group to do 3 more sessions to finish the campaign. I just ghosted the group chat for a while, but Pirate’s roommate is a player in the campaign I DM so Pirate started hopping on the call asking me to come back for the finale. Pirate told me that it would be different this time because all of our characters were going to meet up for the finale and he really wanted to play with me. I naively agreed to give the game a second chance.
The first of those three sessions led to this post and this follow up.
[TLDR - I never got to meet up with the other characters. Colorado made my ex a stripper and I was captured by invaders with no dice rolls to prevent it. I had a conversation with him about my concerns after the last session. He apologized and agreed to make changes saying he needed the campaign for his mental health.]
Colorado decided to have a single super finale session, which I reluctantly attended because of sunk cost fallacy. I was imprisoned, beaten and whipped, separated from my girlfriend and recently resurrected bodyguard. A deus-ex ninja offered to help me escape, but I wanted to save all the prisoners. So I helped the commoners escape with the ninja before saving my girlfriend. My bodyguard got captured, but I made sure my girlfriend escaped and then I went to save my bodyguard because I wasn’t letting her die after she just got resurrected. I tried to find my bodyguard but every door was locked and I was forced into a long one on one fight with a guard that would make John Carpenter blush. I lost the fight due to an unknown -2 modifier on my fighting rolls, leading to my re-imprisonment.
Pirate tried to board a boat to reach my location, but was unsuccessful. Colorado informed him that the sailors refused to let him on the ship because they didn't like his tone. Fortunately, Soldier saved me and we agreed to stop the big bad and rescue my bodyguard together. With a squad of Soldier's peers, we pursued the big bad into the woods. Without any rolls, all the other soldiers were sniped by archers.
Finally, the two of us reached the clearing where the big bad and his followers were. We were outnumbered about 30-2. My bodyguard and the other commoners were tied to a tree. Soldier was the same race as the villain so he approached while I stayed hidden. He delivered an awesome passionate speech against the big bad's actions saying that it wasn’t what their ancestors would want. I’m sitting there waiting and hoping for a persuasion roll… and nothing. Colorado says the big bad doesn’t change his mind and he sets the tree on fire, causing my bodyguard and the commoners to burn to death. Soldier and I retreated into the woods to end the campaign.
Pirate was supposed to have a scene after us, but he fell asleep because it was past 1am. Colorado kept trying to call Pirate on the phone. I joke, “Hey, we’re old now, being up past midnight isn’t as easy as it used to.” To which Colorado replies, “I just thought Pirate had more respect for me than this.” The Discord call becomes quiet and after Colorado starts focusing on Soldier and I. He wants to know why we’re not discussing the ending more. I remarked that it was a bit of a downer and I’m tired. Then Colorado starts spiraling, saying that RPGs are just another medium that he failed at just like film and music. HE STARTS CRYING and hangs up from the Discord call. Soldier and I stayed on and had a short “That was awkward” conversation. I don’t know Soldier well so I didn’t say much about my grievances with the campaign and eventually we ended up just talking about Baldur’s Gate 3 for an hour.
The next day, I wake up to a barrage of texts from Colorado apologizing, mansplaining how hard it is to be a DM as if I’ve never done it myself. He then starts sending me messages with all his ideas for my character in the next season and how he promises I’ll have more freedom next time. I wouldn’t understand, but he NEEDED to do the prison sequence and my bodyguard to die for my character growth, but next season will be different. I tell him I’m not doing another season. Colorado replies saying that he thought I’d say that because Pirate (who was apparently not sleeping) told him Soldier and I were bitching about the campaign after the session. Colorado said that once I get over it, we can start talking about season 3. I reaffirmed my stance. Then Colorado texts me one last time and asks if I’ll still make his maps and character art even if I don’t play. I said no again.
It's been two months since I last heard from Colorado or Pirate. We used to play games and talk about pro wrestling all the time, but now there's been no contact. A lot of the comments on my posts helped me realize I was prioritizing Colorado’s mental health over my own and I felt like it was my responsibility to support his campaign because he constantly referenced how important it was to his mental health. Intentional or not, he preyed upon my empathy. I’m not his Giving Tree and I shouldn’t be left a stump for a campaign where he doesn’t even want us to affect the world.
I sometimes worry Pirate is going through a similar situation to me, but for a longer period of time. Pirate introduced me to Colorado, and he's really loyal to him. I think that slowed down my exit from the group because I trusted Pirate to be my friend as well. I remember opening up to Pirate about a panic attack I had while Colorado was spiraling one day, and he just shrugged it off as me being dramatic. It's frustrating. I want both of them to be happy, but I can't make that happen for them, especially if it comes at the expense of my own well-being.
I ended up venting to some of my irl friends and they really supported and listened to me which is why I didn’t feel a need to vent here. I learned a lot about what not to do when DMing from this campaign and it made me reevaluate my approach to playing RPGs. Now I'm in a group with my irl friends and it's a blast. I can relax and just have fun playing again.
TLDR - I started DMing to stay connected with college friends who were scattered across the country. One player, Pirate, introduced me to Colorado, who eventually took over as the DM. Colorado had some unconventional methods, such as not using character sheets and controlling all the dice rolls. The game became focused on his storyline and my character had limited agency. Despite this, I gave the campaign a second chance. In the final session, things went poorly, and Colorado had a breakdown. Despite his apologies and promises for the next season, I decided not to continue playing. I have not heard from Colorado or Pirate since. I now play with my real-life friends and it's much more enjoyable.

My aunt keeps messaging me about hanging out/going to dinner. I really don’t want to. I’ll give some quick background:
My mother has a very bleh relationship with my aunt and her other siblings, it’s almost like we’re a part of a different family. I’ve gone to dinner with my aunt (and uncle in law) before, and it wasn’t an enjoyable experience. They aren’t happy, and they take it out on my mother. They haven’t talked for almost a year
My extended family is dysfunctional. If anything, they’re toxic. They think I don’t see through their bull, but I know a lot more than they think I do. I can’t believe, for the last decade, how fake some of it was
I’ve never confronted my family before, but I wish I could bring them into a circle and tell them what I think about them for how they’ve treated my mother. They’re like literal children. Instead of communicating their issues, they ghost and insult each other. There are very few members of my extended family that I wish I could have in my life more…

Back in December I sold my single family home property that is in an HOA. I have never had issues with the HOA before, until selling. We notified the HOA that we were selling the property and after it was sold we notified them that it sold.
Once I moved I started getting my mail from my previous home forwarded to my new home. In February I received a bill for HOA dues. I called the company, spoke to someone on the phone who apologized and said they would get it taken care of. Thought it was over with. Except it wasn’t because I continued to received bills with more and more late fees. Each bill I received I would attempt to contact. They wouldn’t answer during normal business hours, so I would leave a voicemail. I would never hear back, but still received late notices for the bills. They are sending it to my old address, but because it still has my name on it, it keeps getting forwarded to me. I have emailed, called, left voicemails but have not been able to get a hold of a single person again. And I still continue to receive bills. Today I received a “final notice” stating they will send me to collections. I can’t call again because it’s Saturday, but now they have removed the ability to leave a voicemail even. I’m afraid even on Monday they still won’t answer, as they had been the trend.
I no longer have the ability to log on to the portal to try and see if I can modify something online myself. They quickly took that access away from me. They just don’t seem to care about resolving this and actually getting their money. I am also not going to pay back pay, and continue to pay monthly dues on a property I have not owned for several months. I also don’t understand how the new owners could be getting away with just not paying HOA dues. They knew about the dues when they bought the property, so wouldn’t they be thinking it’s weird they haven’t received a bill yet? It is not back dues from when I owned the property as I was up to date and all the dues on the bills I am reviewing are from January and onward.
Does anyone have any idea of what am I to do in this situation?

This is kind of a weird post but TLDR I just want to thank Larian for what is possibly the most accurate example of issues I've had in my life.
Non TLDR: I Grew up in a very bad place where my mental health was never a point of discussion besides how good it made me help with my families work. I was taught at a very young age that we did what we did because it was what the family did and to never break from the family. I'm obviously not going to get into what my family does but the story of Orin hits home for me. As an adult I got out of a pretty harsh relationship, left the military and my family only to fall back into them because I was never taught how to be around normal people and find it hard to be in a line of work that doesn't do things my family does. I felt like I either have to be in the military or I have to work with my family. A friend I have in the marines who knows about my issue thinks I should become a mercenary but I really don't want to be what I was anymore.
There have been some video games I've played that helped me start to realize more about myself and how bad what's up with my head really is and thankfully characters such as Krieg and the military really not liking nutcases but being 100% willing to sweep you under the rug while they give you honest help got me in a more positive light. Now that I'm out and back with my family my brother got me to play BG3 with him and for a good second I wasn't aware of what Durge even was, I thought it was just going to be some campy edgy toon which I found funny so I played it with him. Then of course Durge things happened and I think I finally hit that point of no return, in a good way. Durge is what I look like to other people, Durge was used like how I was used and Durge is what I want to be. Someone who moves past their problems and becomes stronger.
When I first played the game I kept Gale's hand and Karlach's head in my inventory at all times because it felt right, I never gave it a second thought until I realized Durge wasn't being some edgy toon but the villain. I started thinking how many people saw me as the hero or the bad guy. It came down to My brother Jack sees me as a hero but no one else would and I wasn't okay with that. So something I've started to do is just listen to the Durge's theme every so often and it feels like being washed with a cleansing water. Like headache slowly goes away.
I had a fight with my sister recently and for the first time in my life my reaction wasn't to figure out some way to solve this disagreement with violence. I couldn't even hold a job growing up because of how my family raised me but I never even considered violence when it came to her in this argument which is rare. There has only ever been a handful of people I could disagree with peacefully, my brother Jack, my father (RIP), an old friend from High School and my dog (again RIP). I even used to think I was sexist because I didn't have a woman who I couldn't not be aggressive towards upon being disagreed with, until while in the military a therapist basically connected my childhood trauma with some kind of disdain. Correlating each of the people I listed above as a safety net for me as a kid that I just never adjusted too and carried into adulthood, thinking I just never meet a woman who I felt safe around like the woman I did as a kid like one of my cousins who I loved dearly but isn't with us anymore. Well until recently, I'm now with an amazing woman but I think the doc was right, I've been correlating my childhood safe peoples with people I like. I miss my cousin, my father and my dog but they'd be proud of me resisting so well.
I don't know, I feel like I'm rambling at this point, but I just wanted to speak into the void about this. Durge has helped me. I feel like if I were to die right now I'd instantly drop downwards. I hope who or whatever is keeping track atleast sees I'm trying to be better but let's hope I can spend more of my life being a good boy than pre-worm Durge.

I work at a fast food place and these women came through and somehow my coworker fucked up their order and these women just threw a huge fit, calling everyone in the store stupid and calling my manager names, yelling at me. I would’ve been able to fix it in just a few seconds if they would’ve focused on explaining what the problem was instead of screaming about how stupid everyone was. She hadn’t even paid yet, so it’s not like she needed a refund! It wasn’t my fault, it wasn’t my manager’s fault, it wasn’t anyone’s fault, the mic on the speaker at the drive through is shit so it’s hard to hear you clearly sometimes, and accidents do happen, we’re only human. Just politely explain what the problem is, we’ll fix it the best we can and than you can move on with your day without ruining mine.
Than there was the time a guy threw a fit because we didn’t have enough change for him to pay for a $5 order with a $100 bill! At 3am! We don’t keep that sort of money in the register at that time because of the risk of getting robbed!
And than, when I was working as a cashier a while back a guy came through wanting to return what appeared to be a dead tree branch, he said it was a tree he had bought from us, he hadn’t brought a receipt, he wasn’t part of our store club thing, he had absolutely no proof that he had bought it from us, so I couldn’t do the return, I was just following the rules and this man was so upset he asked for the manager, who told him the same thing I did, and so this man walked out promising to get us fired over a dead tree. First off, good luck getting us fired over following corporate rules, second off, good! Never come back! If you’re treating us like shit we don’t want to see you again! Fuck off.
I don’t know why people feel like they can treat fast food workers and cashiers like shit, but they do, and they need to stop. I’m usually already having a bad enough day without you adding to it. I’m just doing my job like you no doubt do at yours, just because I’m working here doesn’t mean I’m any less of a human than you. The only reason I can’t get a better job is because my parents fucking decided I wasn’t worth giving any form of education to when they decided to homeschool me and even if they did, I can’t fucking afford college because it’s so expensive that only rich bitches can afford it.

I thought that I could deal with the porn addiction and the listing after other women and it turns out I can't.
I don't like feeling less than or worthless, and I've been made to feel that way most of my life.
I fucking hate that my boyfriend doesn't even have the desire to look at me, unless I'm in costume.
I fucking hate the stranger in the grocery store that looked me up and down and grimaced at me today, I hate that he mentioned me on the phone and called me a whale.
I hate that terrible people around me have love, love that they abuse and still have, whereas I have to beg my boyfriend to go on a fully paid date.
I hate that I had to see the woman he almost replaced me with multiple times yesterday, I had to look at her and see everything I want to be but can't, I hate that my boyfriend wants to make me into her.
I hate that the only reason he's with me is because I take care of him. I hate that he won't take care of me, I hate that I had to beg for months and now that I've given up he's pushing it on me.
I fucking hate that I really don't make up for it, I'm ugly. That's important.
It doesn't matter how well I cook, clean, or care for and support someone. It doesn't matter how much I cater to them, I'm always just going to be the ugly girlfriend that's really more like a mom yet less deserving of respect.
I'm always going to be cheated on, abused, and disrespected

Will try to keep it short. Essentially, I met my current and first girlfriend (20) almost exactly a year ago. We’d met online, and I’d just planned on hitting and quitting. I hit on the first night in her car, minimal effort, no condom, it just took some slick wording over hinge. We ended up continuing to see each other and have sex for weeks in her car, which eventually led to me going to her house, meeting her family, and dating 3 months later. She wanted to date sooner, however I’ve never had a girlfriend and don’t like to rush these things. Anyways, 4 months ago something happened that I still am trying to get over. She told me that when she was dating her ex, (which was only about 2 months before we had met) who she’d been dating for a few years, he had a court case that she had to go vouch for him in. I said that would make me really uncomfortable, so she said she would not go. She then made plans behind my back, still speaking with her ex and his mother about when she would go fly out to his state. She changed his name in her phone to Victorias Secret and didn’t think I would find it suspicious that Victorias Secret was texting her at 9pm. She told me she felt like she had to go because of karma, that she couldn’t let an innocent man be legally penalized for something he did not do. Keep in mind, the court case was over her ex ding dong ditching somebody…
So, eventually, I got over it and said fine, just go, I’ll be good. She gets back two days later, and I saw her exes name in her phone again, so I just checked what the message was about. She had texted her best friend saying how she wishes she had never broken up with her ex, how he treated her perfectly and how “nobody would ever love her like he did because she was his first love.” She asked him to meet her at her hotel room while she was in his state, however he declined. It broke my heart reading that. I genuinely felt my heart drop after I read that message. I have gone so far out of my comfort zone for this girl and she says these things and does these things behind my back. That message showed me that she did not appreciate anything that I have done for her. This girl also draws me pictures of us, talks to me all day, is sleeping at my house most days, saying she wants to start a family with me, etc. so I am constantly pulled both directions. I can see myself with her for a long time but I also don’t want to disrespect myself by staying with someone who would do something like that to me. I’ve tried ignoring it and forgetting about it but I can not stop thinking about the whole situation. She keeps telling me it was in the past, and that she only told her ex those things while she was there because of the fact that I didn’t talk to her much while she was in his state. I don’t think that’s anywhere near a reasonable excuse for doing what she did, and I am having problems sleeping some nights and keeping my hope in our relationship alive. She doesn’t know I constantly think about it still because I try not to show it. She would just tell me it’s in the past. I don't know what to do.

This morning I woke up to a verification code and a changed information on email notification. When trying to login it says that my email didn't have an associated account. I was luckily still logged into on one of my laptops and IDK how but they were able to change the email account associated with my profile. Talking to tech help and even trying to get my contact email changed doesn't help in this situation. How is it that some rando was able to get access to my account and change everything within a couple of minutes but no one at Gamestop can change it back.

My MIL does this to everyone, she can't be good unless everyone else is bad. We never talk about normal everyday things. Luckily also, we hardly see her. But when we do it's as uncomfortable as possible. I was in the dark for years, but it's odd that if this is the case that other family members don't seem to see it. Actually, I think one of the family members does, but it hasn't changed much. I know I can't change it.
My husband sees a lot of it, but is still learning and discovering hard truths about his mother. It is just way too long to summarize. I believe without a doubt she has NPD and BPD, and I've never met anyone who has such control over everyone in their lives that everyone tip toes around her and serves her like a queen who is a sick little victim. My husband has lived away from home for lengths of time in the past and on his own keeps distance from his family because of how things are- this was prior to me ever finding out how they are. We see her maybe 6-7 times a year.
I started emotionally disengaging, which to be honest I never would have thought I would be able to do, because it's uncomfortable. I am starting to feel less hung up on it being unfair, but it doesn't make it any easier. It's embarrassing, and I can only imagine what's being said. It was painfully obvious that his relatives kept distance from me, and I was stared at to an uncomfortable degree. Talkative social relatives didn't say anything to me but hello and goodbye- which is fine, but this was very bizarre. Its like you just know something is up and you are not ok to talk to.
I imagine her saying things like I'm lazy, I don't clean, I don't cook, I only care about money, I put my husband in debt, I want to turn my husband against his family, I'm changing him, etc..... because that's MIL, and she's already trying to dog whistle this crap, acting like she is me and I am her. My husband is where he is in life in spite of her.
It makes me wonder how to draw it out of her and make her say how she really feels. I want her to say it directly and clear to our faces. How could I do this? And if you were smeared, how did you figure it out and did it ever come to a head? I've dealt with plenty of toxic people in my life, but this was very weird. I felt like people weren't supposed to talk to me at this recent family event.

Hey.. I am 16F with my dad 46M and my mother 45F who are currently married though their marriage would hardly be considered a marriage at all.. I’m gonna give a lot of background to explain this so take a nice little seat back
Telling my father this would likely cause a lot of drama and result in my mother experiencing a lot of flack. I also must admit that my reasoning to tell my father and this is not one of morality but out of a desire for revenge
I harbour a strong dislike towards my mother due to recent developments therefore I will try to keep this as unbiased as possible but as the story progresses you may find me leaning towards supporting my father
Since I’ve been very young, I’ve come to the realisation that my parents are not in a happy relationship. They’ve almost constantly been fighting, my father is an alcoholic tho he is able to stay sober most of the time.. he often has monthly fits when he disappears and drinks himself unconscious for a few weeks. During this time, when I was a child my mother would usually do the same at home albeit by locking herself in her room and not coming out for days. During this time, I usually looked after myself.
Ever since I can remember, my mother has been very vocal to me about my father’s affairs. He’s had over six affairs that I am familiar with. I was blamed for most of the affairs and all his absences were also attributed to be completely my fault. My mother was.. not a very kind woman to me during this time and also made my father’s absences public knowledge to all her friends, his friends, and their families. I sympathised with her back then despite her blaming me for it and despised my father a little bit for a long time
Despite this, him and I harbour a decent relationship and always have. Unlike my mother and I, we have a lot less disagreements and tend to rarely get into serious fights.
My mother and I on the other hand truly dislike each other. She is always looking at ways to poke at my insecurities and nowadays I do the same to her. All our conversations usually end in her wishing I were dead or me telling her I wish she wasn’t my mother. She has been greatly the reason for a lot of my deteriorating mental health and self destructive behavior however this is not to say she is an awful mother or an awful woman. She has shown great strength in raising me and encourages me academically, recently my family has gone through some difficult times of which she was largely the reason we survived and for that I am grateful. (If you guys ask I’ll let you know what those things were)
Regardless her relationship with me is not really one of mother and daughter but of two people who do not get along. Neither my father nor my mother have truly parented me and I mostly raised myself for the most part with the help of some house help my parents often employed.
Anyways, my mother has always desired for me to be present during her disagreements with my father no matter how violent they turned to be, she also didn’t hesitate to make anything PG and very openly discussed topics involving loan sharks/sex/violence in front of me from when i was at most three years old. Now she claims she hoped it would have made me see her side more but really is just traumatised me. My father always insisted for me to not be present during those fights and never really said things to disgusting or vulgar. Earlier I had assumed it was because he wanted to save his reputation but that was not the case
Recently my mother has stated seeing guys on tinder.. and started trying to have affairs with her college or high school friends. She has told me this secret in great trust and some of you might think this is justified but..
Last year I found out that my mother has also been cheating on my father the whole time of their relationship and he knew. In fact she was the one to start an affair with someone else first before he did anything and during the years that I like to believe were the most traumatising of my life. A time when I was considering doing very self destructive things to myself and there was no stability at home , their fights and revelations about my father’s bad deeds were at its peek and during this time I hated my father but now I’ve found out my mother was in a relationship with a man only twelve years older than me at the time who was a family friend and I was in fact close to as well. She has also had a similar amount of affairs as my father
This changed the trajectory of my life. The story I had believed in for almost my whole life— my father being a un-loyal cheat and my mother being his terribly hurt wife had been a lie (my mother was the one who admitted to this whole thing btw I haven’t told my father I know yet). And the worst part is that despite knowing all this my father never told me
Even now when my mother leaves no stone unturned in insulting my father’s finances and saying he doesn’t love me at all…
My father still doesn’t reveal the whole truth in front of me. This entire time he probably wanted me to leave the fights so he can actually yell at her about the things she has done. The only thing he has revealed that she did was the time when my grandmother (fathers mother) had cancer and she forced her to leave the house with nothing but clothes (not even her slippers) and how she walked barefoot all the way for twenty kms that day. She died two days later, away from my parent’s house. In my mother’s defense my father was drunk and wasn’t home at this time but even my mother admits my grandmother was never unkind to her and treated her better than her own mother. If she had been taken to the hospital she had likely survived
Beyond this, my father has never seriously bad mouthed my mother other than fun quips we make or letting be express my frustrations and chiming it a bit encouragingly but nothing like my mother’s complete emotional manipulation of explaining everything he had done wrong while sobbing to her eight year daughter as her therapist
Anyways now that she is dating again and going out on dates.. I want revenge. I need to tell my dad she’s is betraying him again because this time he doesn’t know. I need to tell this entire family that she isn’t the victim she portrays herself to be. I need to tell their friends the truth of how unstable she is and how she’s pretty much ruined my entire life. I can’t blame her for all my issues and I admit that my father will always love alcohol more than me but nowadays I am so angry at her that I can’t breath in the same room as her and it’s killing me. I need some sort of retribution for having given up my entire childhood consoling a mentally unstable woman crying about something that wasn’t even true. I’m sorry if I’m referring to her in a mean way or if I sound like an asshole and honestly I genuinely think I might be one so I don’t know.
As a child my mother put various restrictions and put me through other unfaiabusive treatment that I didn’t specify but can go into detail later and after finding out the truth about her cheating it felt like a final nail in the coffin. I’m not saying I am perfect either, I would like to emphasise that other than my good performance academically and the fact I don’t drink/smoke/party/hookup, I am a very very bad daughter and while I feel guilty for this and some of the things my mom has said to me have been both true and reasonable, even I think I didn’t deserve some of her behaviour
I’m not gonna reveal this to her friends or coworkers even tho she never hesitated before airing out our dirty laundry. I’m also not going to tell far away family and I wouldn’t have said anything at all if she hadn’t started again but now that my dad isn’t doing anything, I think he should know that she is. Anyways she might not pay for my college after this and my dad can’t afford it probably and I need to escape this house by next year but I still want to reveal the truth.
TLDR: should I expose my mother to everyone she’s been lying to ?

I decided to switch to see how well it did and now my game crashes and I can’t even get into the settings to change it. Anyone find a fix?

My past has been depressing, my present is depressing i just can’t believe my life will change for the better. I have to work for myself but i don’t believe that no matter how hard i work i will achieve success.
On top of all that I’m an ugly girl. I have had many mental breakdowns before and now because I’m exhausted from my ugliness. I can’t stop envying pretty girls/women. I just can’t. Everything is so easier when you’re pretty. People want to be friends with you, they dont make fun of your physical appearance + there are more privileges of being good looking as well.
I see girls who get good grades and are pretty and thinking about just makes me depressed no matter how hard I try to not think of it. I feel like they are God’s favorites and God has cursed me. I can’t stop being angry because of this either. I am not good at anything, I’m a horrible person and I’m hideous. I have failed in every way. How can there be hope for someone like me.
Being an ugly girl affects my social life as well. No one wants to be friends with me. Girls are rarely nice to me and I don’t talk to males because my self respect hasn’t died yet but my will to live has surely died. My 2 friends aren’t in my life physically anymore and I have blocked one of them because I am sick and tired of being ghosted for months and months and as an overthinker I can’t help it but think negatively. Like I still can’t forget how she said she was embarrassed to be seen with me but she’s grateful because she found out how toxic our classmates are.
Back when I was less ugly, there was a guy who was in love with me ( we didn’t even talked + it’s a long story I dont want to share ) but I guess I still wasn’t good looking enough to be taken seriously and he just talked but no action because after all I was still ugly. Thinking about this makes it worst.
I don’t wanna exist. I wish I was never born for which I hate my parents and I will never forgive them for being selfish enough to bring to into this world for their own needs.
I don’t know what I need, maybe I need prayers or advice. I don’t know.

Curious what people think of this specific situation.
I am quite laid back when it comes to texting but my friend expects immediate or very quick responses. When I say I am laid back, I just mean I don't respond immediately in 5 minutes and I'm not someone who feels offended if they don't reply for a few hours (or even if they take a day or so). I often won't even see the text for a good few hours because I do work full time and am not always clung to my phone.
He has said I mostly take "days" to respond. Usually that's not true and when it has happened in the past there was a reason (I wasn't well) which I apologised for. We also already spoke about this at length because he was offended at the time, and he appeared to be understanding and said he knows I respond when I can and the reason I was a bit quiet for a period of time- but now it feels like it's being thrown in my face so he's clearly holding a grudge about that. I apologised again that I did disappoint him that time and we were fine after that (or so I thought).
As a rule normally I make an effort to respond within the same day since then because I know for him it's important but it still feels like it's not good enough because it's not instant.
It isn't that "I've seen the text but couldn't be bothered" it's a "I was at work so didn't check my phone for hours, or I was out for the day, or I was sleeping, I didn't have data so WhatsApp didnt come through until I got home a few hours later" - so to me these feel like just normal and understandable reasons for not getting back to someone within 5 minutes? We are adults and I feel like if you text me during the day and I get back to you in the evening then that's pretty good going? If it was urgent, I'd expect a phone call so I definitely know straight away.
For example, last week he sent me a message asking if I was free, no context for why. I was sleeping at the time as I'd just got back from holiday, so it was about 4 hours later that I responded and apologised for missing his text, it was late by this point so I couldn't chat but I suggested " I'm sorry I missed this text, should we talk tomorrow if you're free?" And he didn't reply to this so I assumed that was a no. Then didn't hear from him for ages so ironically, he didn't reply to me 😆 (but it's a crime for me not to reply immediately). After I week I didn't hear from him so I reached out again, he threw this in my face and said he isn't going to reach out when I don't respond- so even though I got back to him a few hours later it is still unacceptable? I don't feel it is reasonable at all to expect me to reply immediately or else?
He also said if he messages me during the day and I reply in the evening that this is not good enough? However I can't promise to reply immediately, I could be at work or doing anything, I also don't have unlimited data and he uses WhatsApp, so if I'm out for the day that message might not come through until I get home. Is this not just normal and fair enough? There are lots of times I do reply instantly as well or like within an hour or so.
I feel that he only wants to talk to me so he can offload his problems, so often wants to speak about it there and then maybe? So I'm not giving that immediate response he wants and that might be why he finds it so annoying because he wants to talk right this instant. I also fundamentally disagree that I should be available at all times and if I'm not then that makes me a bad friend. I wouldn't expect him to always be free. I feel like he won't respond to me out of spite even though if I did that to him he would kick off...
He's said he's not going to keep reaching out when it takes days to respond, but it's rare that I would take days, it's usually within 24 hours at the most. In the past when I knew I was not going to be able to talk I've sent a text in advance saying "I'm really sorry I can't talk for a bit but I will reach out " so they had advance warning that I couldn't have a 2 hour catch up at the drop of a hat for a while. He even said to me that he knows it is not fair to expect someone to speak at the drop of a hat so I thought it was all good. It feels like my needs aren't important and only his because HE needs to talk, so there's no empathy or respect for my time. To me that shows a lack of respect for me and only caring about himself and what HE wants.
We normally have like 3 hour catch ups once or twice a week usually which I feel is quite a lot! He also doesn't text me that much anyway so it is interesting that he is so offended by it, we usually "chat" when we speak over video call, not back and forth texting. I also spoke to him (for like 3-4 hours) nearly EVERY DAY last year because of a very difficult situation he was in which I was more than happy to do to help, but of course speaking for hours a day was not going to be sustainable in the long term. I have a partner and my own life and work full time so it's just not possible. It's almost like all of the support I did show was just discarded the second I couldn't do what he wanted. I feel like he is focusing on the wrong things here, why not focus on the fact that I do give him a lot of my time, rather than me taking a few hours to respond?
I don't expect to hear from him again but it's awkward because I work with him. He is extremely stubborn so if he has decided that I've done something wrong, he is unlikely to see where he might be being unfair too. So rather than meet in the middle it's like it is going to be his way or the highway. Ultimately I respect that maybe he just needs friends who are available 24/7, but I personally don't agree nor could I do that if I wanted to (but also how many people can promise this?) I think it's just difference of opinion. But it's like our whole friendship just thrown out the window for something I think he is being unfair about. And now I'm so upset thinking he just hates me now. At the end of the day if the friendship is not meant to be then it's not meant to be, but the backdrop of how supportive I've been it feels like I was just used and then discarded.
I feel stupid and it's really triggered my abandonment feelings and I've even thought of not being here anymore as a result. How do you guys cope when someone turns on you like that and thinks they are in the right? I really don't feel I've done something wrong but it hurts to think he has just cast me off so easily because he expects me to reach unreasonable expectations.
Thoughts?

Throwaway just in case. My mom was supposed to take me out to the mall so I can buy clothes. I am 20. Perfectly capable of going on my own but she assumes i don’t know how to pick clothes. I said fine since it’s mother’s day and I’d love to go out just the two of us. I woke up early and expected her to get ready but she wasn’t. When I asked her if we were still going out she said yes. Long story short she did housework and went upstairs to her room at 5pm. I asked her again if we were going just in case she was tired and wanted to lay down. She said yes and went to get ready. I started getting ready as well and then she asked me if I knew what store we were going to. I was a little saddened and said yea because I expected to go around the place and just try on many stores. I went back to my room and heard my grandmother asking me when are we leaving and I was even surprised that she was going with us since she can’t stand for long and she can’t walk for long distances. I told her I didn’t know. I went back upstairs and asked my mom if it wouldn’t be better to just give me the money. and that I’d go some other day alone earlier so I could see all stores and walk around as long as I can. She was offended and asked why but immediately followed with a sarcastic laugh asking if anyone had convinced me to. She genuinely believed I was lying to her. I told her that no and that I want to walk around and see stores but it won’t be possible with grandma around since she hates that place and she will need to sit. We can’t just leave just her somewhere thats absurd. I added that I want us to go out without my brothers or my grandma for once (we never did that) and that she didn’t seem like she even wanted to go out with me. I actually meant that she seemed too tired to go out with me but I really did word that wrong and I got emotional and sad so it came out a little shaky and she started screaming at how I am a fucking baby who always cries and how she’s sick of me. Basically she got very defensive and started yelling about how I am a liar and a bad person for not telling her this before she wore her clothes and sat down. She was actually still in her bed watching tiktoks with only her jeans on and that is what made me think that she was too tired to drive and walk and whatever. We started screaming at each other, she claimed that I was a liar and hid something, and I screamed back that I was not and that it was absurd to go at 6pm to the most famous place in our city. We also live an hour away. She yelled at me so hard and I went to my room and got hysterical and she laughed sarcastically and told me that I am just like her sister who disowned them. (Her sister stopped talking to my grandfather twenty years ago or more because she believed he didn’t love her.) I told her that she talks to me as if she hates me and that I just wanted a day for us both only and she went and slammed the door to her room and screamed on how she never wants to see me again, how she regrets ever giving birth to me.
P.S : She had told me two months ago that she wanted to give me money so I could treat myself so of course I was happy. The next day she said that it would be better if we went together to the mall and that she’d pay for anything I pick as long as it’s in the budget she made for me. We went there at 4pm and it was incredibly full. There were no parking spots anywhere literally. She asked me if she could just give me the money and I can shop with a friend some day later and I said sure. She never gave me the money and whenever I asked her she would say yes of course I’ll send you the money, and then she doesn’t. I let it go of course and I thought she forgot about it until last week when she mentioned it and I asked her to give me the money instead of going with me since I was shopping online anyway. She said not to trust online shops and that we should go out together to shop.
I know I am the asshole I just need confirmation and advice. Thank you

TL;DR I’m very picky and only drink one brand of water
Here’s my anecdotal explanation that some of you may brush off or think I’m crazy. Started getting into sparkling water years ago but remained a filtered water drinker for the cost saving. When I moved to this town I found that the tap water was so hard I couldn’t afford a filter that would suffice. You can see it when you spill some and the water drys it leaves a white stain. I looked up test results my town averages over 800ppm DS from the tap. There’s also concerning levels of various contaminants. Researching home water filters was very discouraging when most don’t filter out what I want to be filtered out or they actually add aluminum to the filtered water. I started buying cases of sparkling water in glass bottles and pretty much became addicted to sparkling mineral water. I became a fiend, driving all over town looking for different brands of sparkling mineral water to try every one and determine the best. My co-worker kept telling me I need to try this brand from his hometown but it was a really small company I’d never seen or heard of. One day it appeared in my grocery store so I had to try a bottle. Reading the label I was quite intrigued. 1k+ mg/lt mineral content, produced in the same state I buy it but the most interesting part was the pH. It’s naturally alkaline (no added oxidizers) 7.4-8.0 pH. When I started getting into water I came across an article about alkaline water saying that nearly all alkaline water is made by adding oxidizers (the opposite of antioxidants which has supposed anti-aging health effects and people claim is a health benefit of wine. Oxidizers from what the article claimed made you age faster.) and all the naturally alkaline water they mentioned was super rare and expensive so like most people, I looked at alkaline water as a scam. This water did not brand itself as alkaline water though. The part that says it’s alkaline is very small on the back of the bottle. Anyways, I could tell from the very first sip that this was a game changer. Over the course of my first few weeks drinking this brand exclusively, I found that I didn’t crave water so much like I didn’t get super strong urges to chug a bunch like I did so frequently before. Consequently, I was also urinating less but also found that my urine color was not getting any darker. It felt like I was retaining more of the water that I was drinking and the water I was drinking before had just been running through me. I don’t know how else to describe the feeling because it was just a feeling. I also started to feel like my skin was less dry. The town I live in is very arid so dry/flaking skin is common. The first time I visited this town, I expelled two bloody boogers on separate mornings. People told me that was common in the morning because the air is so dry that it drys out your nose so much when you sleep it’ll cause the blood vessels in your nostrils to get too close to the skin and the skin cracks and it’ll bleed a little until it clots and the clot is what’s being expelled in the morning. I experienced this a few more times when I moved up here and when it stopped I assumed my nose had just gotten acclimated to the climate. Recently, however, my brand of sparkling water has been out of stock at my grocery store and I haven’t been able to find it anywhere else yet. I’ve been drinking Tehuacán, Topo Chico and Saratoga. Even if I didn’t care about the brand or who owns them or how they’re bad for the environment or there’s trace levels of toxic waste in every bottle, they still don’t taste as good. My brand tasted like soda. It’s actual ambrosia to me. Additionally, that constant urge to chug water is coming back and bringing more frequent urination and that feeling that the water is just running through me. Anyways, today I had my third bloody booger within a week and realized this started happening again shortly after I switched my water. I thought about the last few times it happened and realized I only had one small one since I started drinking my brand. Maybe there are other extenuating factors that I have not considered but I’m fairly convinced that the source of your water can affect how well it hydrated you. People on this sub seem to think otherwise so I expect to be told to grow up and stop overthinking this but as long as I can afford it, it’s worth it to me. I’m still open to having my mind changed if you think there’s something else that can explain my experience.

I 21F am 5 ft 11
For this reason, often in dating apps I make a point to tell men I match with my height because I want to be transparent about that before we meet up. It’s on my profile but it always gets missed. I think it’s because I don’t “look tall” in my photos. I dress very femininely and am otherwise petite so I think my height doesn’t come across in the dating profile photos, which are all solo pictures.
This man 24M had his height on his profile. Because he had listed his height on his profile (6 ft 2) I didn’t bother talking about height.. (I also have my height listed).
When we met he was clearly shorter than me. I wasn’t in heels.
He said women don’t know how to judge height anyway, they “just like the number”, so he fudged his.
At the end of the date when I got home he asked me over text if I’d like to see him again and I said no. I didn’t mention the height I just kept it vague and said I wasn’t feeling a connection (which was true)
AITAH for this?
I want to be with someone my height or taller than me. I am willing to make an exception if we really vibe but this wasn’t there either and I didn’t like the comment he made to validate him lying about it.

Me (24F), and my husband (31M), are married for two years now, met around 5 years ago. We have a two year old son and recently bought a house. It’s hard to pinpoint when our problems started, I think it’s been building up for a while now. We met abroad, he was in military. After living and dating there, we moved back to the U.S. (I am not originally from here) and decided to get engaged. Our marriage functions well from the outside, we share chores, we both work from home and things seem to go well, we do our best for our son. However, I can’t shake of a feeling of deep emptiness and loneliness from lack of emotional connection. My husband seems to despise his life, even when he says he’s happy. After our son goes to bed, he rushes out to play games, watch TV (that’s the only thing we do together recently), or just to so his own thing. We have sex, but it always feels rushed, and then he’s back in the basement by himself. He doesn’t listen to my pleads for more intimacy, for more talking. He claims „we are together all the time”. I can’t help to start feeling resentful towards him because yes, we’re both physically here, but he looks down on his phone, always busy with something. I see him laughing and smiling when some new collectibles he cares about are released or when some celebrity he follows does something funny, but I don’t remember last time he smiled at me with joy. He does not want to go out with me to meet my friends, or do anything else. If we go on dates, it’s because I suggested it. And recently, I stopped suggesting. When I walk into his room in the evening, and see his bothered look, I give up. I don’t try to engage into deep discussions, scared he’ll say it’s too exhausting. I try to be the best wife, never forget a single special day, cook and support him during his PTSD therapy, but my glass is almost empty. When I don’t feel well or get sick, I feel like it’s annoying to him. When I cry, he gets annoyed too, often says I’m needy. He takes care of the house, renovates and works hard, I know it’s exhausting. But we don’t even go to bed at the same time, when I tried to suggest it he said evening is the only time he can do things he enjoys. Apparently, those things don’t involve spending time with me. I’m tired and I don’t know what to do. I started living more by myself, joined a sports league and met new friends. I got in shape and I’m planning to finish my second degree soon. He’s often complaining and daydreaming about how he’ll finally move out of U.S. after our son grows up, saying how much he hates this house and all the repairs. It makes me miserable, I dreamed to make a life for us, I work so we can be happy, but nothing seems to change. I can’t help the feeling that he’s waiting for better times when for me, it’s now. Recently our wedding in my home country had to be cancelled; wedding I planned entirely by myself. He seems relieved, I’m extremely sad. He did not talk to me about it much, all I got was pat on the shoulder.
Please let me know what you think