Chut ko choda

I'm 18 currently in class 12th. Jb Maine 10th pass Kiya mera result 66.4% tha below avg student hu mujhe jee ke bare mein dost ne bataya or bola dono sath me hi preparation krenge fir bola avi 10th ke baad admission nhi lene agle saal admission lenge 11th me ek saal drop le ke 9th 10th ka basics strong kr lo pta nhi kaise ye bakchod wala idea Maine maan bhi liya or addmission nhi liya lekin us saal Maine kuch bhi nhi padha sir video games, movies, social media yhi sb Kiya pure ek saal waste kr diye fir 11th me addmission liya socha ab se padhunga fir whi haal hua padhai ka aadat hi chut gya to kaise padhta 11th bhi pura waste kr diya ek single chapter bhi nhi padha 2 saal se book copy touch bhi nhi Kiya Aisa bhi nhi tha ki Mai bohot enjoy kr rha tha lekin padhne ka bilkul maan nhi krta tha padhai se maan hi hat gya Ghar mein bhi sab bolna chor diye hai dost log ke sath reh ke Nasha bhi krne lga hu avi 12th me gya online batch liya hu pw ka sb kuch hai padhne ke liya sara resource for bhi ab maan hi nhi kr rha padhne ka 12th ka class 1 April se start hua ek single lecture nhi attend Kiya hu mujhe bhi nhi pta hai ki Mai ky kr rha hu din bhar phone use krna or raat ko soo Jana kabhi kabhi to suicide krne ka bhi Maan Kiya hai. I wasted 18 years of my life😭😓

Bhai Mera 29 2nd shift tha and then 6 shift 1 tha dono baar high cutoff gaya in dono ka mera pura jee kharab ho gaya And being a dropper I got 1.3 lakh rank kya koi h jiska same aaya h pls tell koi college h jo mil sakta h Last year meri rank 30 k thi 97 percentile aai thi kuch iss baar kharab shift ke wajah se suffer karna pada Mere dost ki 95 thi last year uski bhi 27 1st and 6 1 ke wajah se sab kharab ho gaya uska 91 aai h Har baar meri galti nahi hoti kismat and bhout cheeze matter karti h Mene to saare questions kare h ra sir ke Ashish sir ke saare ktk saleem sir ke saare kpp DPP and then bhi nhi hua Aur Jo one shot dekhe unka ho gaya Bhai kuch samaz nahi aara kya me itna deserve nahi karta tha ki qualify ho jau kya one shot jisne dekha h uske pass mujhe jyada knowledge ho gai Abe ye aasan paper me yahi ek dikkat h ki upar upar se padke sabko benifit milta h me fir chut** hu Jo 1 month lagaya conic ko dia And bhai conic se 1st shift me to simple formula based aaya and then 2nd me 3 questions the jisme se 2 bonus kar diye and mene usme total me 20 25 min lagya tha wo bhi sab waste time Bhai kuch samaz nahi aara lag raha h sab khatam ho gya tbh Socha tha teacher interaction me aaunga sab khatam ho gaya Bhai hope se aage life me opportunity na jaye hath se lekin bhai dukh to hota h isse badiya pichle saal nit chala jata iss saal to kuch mil he nahi rhaa Let me tell you one more thing Vit me meri 15 k h 5 cat mil Rahi h Vellore me cse wo me nahi le sakta Comedk me mene hug dia tbh Bits me mere pichle saal 280 marks the lekin mere board me overall 83 h lekin pcm me 74.8 h iske wajah se addmission nahi hua bhai kuch nahi bacha mere pass mene aur koi bhara he nahi tha paper Edit -ek cheez aur Bhai meri 0.02 percentile se chuta h cut-off meri Jan me 93... Aai mujhe laga 92 tak jayegi and mene tabse adv ki tayari shuru kardi mene pw ka Varun batch shuru Kara aur bhi 2 batch kar rha tha mkc gaand fat gai 2 St 29Jan evening 100- me bhout nervous ho gaya tha 1nd 6 Jan morning 140- mene bhout saari galti kardi

They killed my dog that I had raised and made me sign the papers. I don't particularly hate my father because even he did not have a say but it was my mother's doing. She is in her school doing whatever the fuck she does and made me kill what I could call my child. 9 days to jee. Drop year. Already depressed as fuck. Everything is falling apart. I force myself to live and study everyday. Now she does that. Aaj ke din na padhai hui na hone vali hai. Emotional bakchodi on top. Kyun karra hun jee. Kiske liye kar raha hun. Melatonin ke gummies pade hain mere pass sleeping problems hain. Kya hi karna hai behen ki chut 20 gummies kha lunga apne aap full apne kutte ki tarah hi mar jaunga. Voh bhi neend ki tarah site hue mara hoga main bhi mar jata hu. Kutte ki ma ka bhosda baki sab bhi chuda hi hua hai. Bas one more reason to hate life. Aur voh behen ka loda nadi mein doob gaya tha fir bhi madarchod bach gaya. Uske severe physical trauma hua mental fits ki vajah se fir bhi bhagwan ne bacha liya. Ek mahine tak dhudhte rage fir bhi ni mila fir bhi bhagwan ne bacha liya. Aur in behen ke Lodon ne mar diya. I could basically not do much for him because mujhe jee pe focus karna hai. There were ways to save him but they instead chose to "euthanize" him. Pretty sure that's what awaits me if I am in a similar condition. Conditional love hai bhai. Kai bar kaha hai mujhse chor denge terko ek do bar ghar ke bahar rat mein bhi nikala hai. There is literally no hope. Let's see how my mind pulls me out this time. Agar kisi ko background pata hoga to he must know main vaise bhi mentally chuda hi hua hun it's the final straw. Like the official mini form of tragedy. Let's observe how my mind pulls me out of this vortex. Let's see how I save myself. Let's sit and watch.

Maine correction window me GT remove kia tha Par salo ne update nhi kia
Maine invigilator ko bola absent kar do aur ghar jane do to Jane bhi nhi de rhe,😭😭
Mai GT exam dia but meri admit card me GT nhi hai😭😭😭
Aur invigilator ko nhi pta the ke English 45 min ka hai Sale ne 25 min bacha hai bolke 10 min me omr sheet lale, mere kuch questions chut gye 😭😭😭 😢

Bhai maine apni gaand NTA ko bechdi hai paise dekar. Ab mai inka slave hun. Raat ko bade sahab ne paper postpone kardia kyuki manpower nahi hai. accha bhala 17 ko free hojata . Admit card le aaya tha ab bkl centre change kardenge, oo iski maa ki chut yaar

kuuteh saleh bhen ke laudeh teri maa ki chut bosdiwaleh teri mayiaa ka bur chodu badwa salaa madar chood ka pilla randi ka baal machr ki jhaat chipkili ke taate gobar putr kuttiya ka pila baapchoda betichod chachi chod mama chod randi ka aulaad sala haram zada suur jahnt ke baal bakri chod chua chod randhwa raand ja jaamai chut marikeh lavda lavdeh ke baal kutaa ke luli bakri ki chut chipkili ke aand randi baaz kukur chod maai ka choda tera bhen ka choda bur phtleh chud ke 100 baap ka chuda hua kutta ka pila hua naali ka keeda taateh massina bur ke chatel chodu bhagat chut mari ka chut ka pilaa gaand ka sodagar chucci chusneh waleh jhaat ka bhaaji land peh chdeh ja kuuteh saleh bhen ke laudeh teri maa ki chut bosdiwaleh teri mayiaa ka bur chodu badwa salaa madar chood ka pilla randi ka baal machr ki jhaat chipkili ke taate gobar putr kuttiya ka pila baapchoda betichod chachi chod mama chod randi ka aulaad sala haram zada suur jahnt ke baal bakri chod chua chod randhwa raand ja jaamai chut marikeh lavda lavdeh ke baal kutaa ke luli bakri ki chut chipkili ke aand randi baaz kukur chod maai ka choda tera bhen ka choda bur phtleh chud ke 100 baap ka chuda hua kutta ka pila hua naali ka keeda taateh massina bur ke chatel chodu bhagat chut mari ka chut ka pilaa gaand ka sodagar chucci chusneh waleh jhaat ka bhaaji land peh chdeh ja kuuteh saleh bhen ke laudeh teri maa ki chut bosdiwaleh teri mayiaa ka bur chodu badwa salaa madar chood ka pilla randi ka baal machr ki jhaat chipkili ke taate gobar putr kuttiya ka pila baapchoda betichod chachi chod mama chod randi ka aulaad sala haram zada suur jahnt ke baal bakri chod chua chod randhwa raand ja jaamai chut marikeh lavda lavdeh ke baal kutaa ke luli bakri ki chut chipkili ke aand randi baaz kukur chod maai ka choda tera bhen ka choda bur phtleh chud ke 100 baap ka chuda hua kutta ka pila hua naali ka keeda taateh massina bur ke chatel chodu bhagat chut mari ka chut ka pilaa gaand ka sodagar chucci chusneh waleh jhaat ka bhaaji land peh chdeh ja kuuteh saleh bhen ke laudeh teri maa ki chut bosdiwaleh teri mayiaa ka bur chodu badwa salaa madar chood ka pilla randi ka baal machr ki jhaat chipkili ke taate gobar putr kuttiya ka pila baapchoda betichod chachi chod mama chod randi ka aulaad sala haram zada suur jahnt ke baal bakri chod chua chod randhwa raand ja jaamai chut marikeh lavda lavdeh ke baal kutaa ke luli bakri ki chut chipkili ke aand randi baaz kukur chod maai ka choda tera bhen ka choda bur phtleh chud ke 100 baap ka chuda hua kutta ka pila hua naali ka keeda taateh massina bur ke chatel chodu bhagat chut mari ka chut ka pilaa gaand ka sodagar chucci chusneh waleh jhaat ka bhaaji land peh chdeh ja kuuteh saleh bhen ke laudeh teri maa ki chut bosdiwaleh teri mayiaa ka bur chodu badwa salaa madar chood ka pilla randi ka baal machr ki jhaat chipkili ke taate gobar putr kuttiya ka pila baapchoda betichod chachi chod mama chod randi ka aulaad sala haram zada suur jahnt ke baal bakri chod chua chod randhwa raand ja jaamai chut marikeh lavda lavdeh ke baal kutaa ke luli bakri ki chut chipkili ke aand randi baaz kukur chod maai ka choda tera bhen ka choda bur phtleh chud ke 100 baap ka chuda hua kutta ka pila hua naali ka keeda taateh massina bur ke chatel chodu bhagat chut mari ka chut ka pilaa gaand ka sodagar chucci chusneh waleh jhaat ka bhaaji land peh chdeh ja kuuteh saleh bhen ke laudeh teri maa ki chut bosdiwaleh teri mayiaa ka bur chodu badwa salaa madar chood ka pilla randi ka baal machr ki jhaat chipkili ke taate gobar putr kuttiya ka pila baapchoda betichod chachi chod mama chod randi ka aulaad sala haram zada suur jahnt ke baal bakri chod chua chod randhwa raand ja jaamai chut marikeh lavda lavdeh ke baal kutaa ke luli bakri ki chut chipkili ke aand randi baaz kukur chod maai ka choda tera bhen ka choda bur phtleh chud ke 100 baap ka chuda hua kutta ka pila hua naali ka keeda taateh massina bur ke chatel chodu bhagat chut mari ka chut ka pilaa gaand ka sodagar chucci chusneh waleh jhaat ka bhaaji land peh chdeh ja kuuteh saleh bhen ke laudeh teri maa ki chut bosdiwaleh teri mayiaa ka bur chodu badwa salaa madar chood ka pilla randi ka baal machr ki jhaat chipkili ke taate gobar putr kuttiya ka pila baapchoda betichod chachi chod mama chod randi ka aulaad sala haram zada suur jahnt ke baal bakri chod chua chod randhwa raand ja jaamai chut marikeh lavda lavdeh ke baal kutaa ke luli bakri ki chut chipkili ke aand randi baaz kukur chod maai ka choda tera bhen ka choda bur phtleh chud ke 100 baap ka chuda hua kutta ka pila hua naali ka keeda taateh massina bur ke chatel chodu bhagat chut mari ka chut ka pilaa gaand ka sodagar chucci chusneh waleh jhaat ka bhaaji land peh chdeh ja

bhai dimag kharab hogaya search karte huye ki last date kya hai, all subjects ke improvement exam ko dene ke mujhe bas chut kara chaiye physics aur chemistry se lekin agar iss saal nahi gaya tu agle saal college mei woh allow nahi karenge meri boards mei 60% aayi hai please help
mei physics aur chemistry ki calculations mei bohot bura hoon aur isley mujhe repeat karne ka mann nahi hai lekin shayad woh hi option hai

Just had I am having I dont know what the fuck it is just over it's not about jee its about everything my life will always collapse within itself and i will never be able toachieve anything in my life madarchod yeh mama kept on snoring in the night I couldn't sleep my head hurts and now some random ass fucking auntie and her child won't let me sleep (her daughter was in her home for a makeover or some shit and my sister and she are friends and she lost some good stuffworth 40k) she came yesterday aur mere mama tak ko dhundhna mein lagaya I was about to sleep at 12pm till 1:30 pm par yeh madarchod aa gaye sone ni diya ab main so ni para sir dard ho raha and even if I manage to sleep I will still end up sleeping at like 3or 4 am advanced 9 am onwards hai it's like always like everytime I can controll nothing people might as well spit in my face behenchod God gifted behen ka loda madarchod randi hu main bas chutiya sala jhant bhar ki jindagi usne ma bap bhai behen sab munh pe antagonistic hain bak bal khatam ni hoti conditionally supportive jab main give up kar chuka tha to sabne kaha padh loda lassan ab main padhna chahta hun to sari bakchodi inki abhi yad ati hai behenchod jhoothe hypocrites moody sale aur main chutiya madarchod kuch ni kar sakta kuch ni there is nothing my life had been fucked my life will be fucked and it will remain fucked I am at the end I cannot motivate myself even further I can do nothing nothing nothing behenchod sari willpower chus gayi hai madarchod madarchod madarchodadarchid madarchod madarchod behenchod how the fuck are people even happy with their lives why don't they just die what's the point what the fuck calm down Kuch ni hora yahan mental breakdown hai and I am not sure if I can recov- Stop stop stop. It's the only chance for me to take over my broken down fucked up psyche and you must not give in to the anxious force the bitch guy within you. Feelings are fucked and they must be burned at an altar. Feel feelings selectively. Many things, many thought patterns that you find yourself in are a result if past trauma, current conditions of your life, and much more. These feelings can lead to one taking drastic steps. The only way to counteract all of this is to give into pure rationality. Giving into pure rationality I must admit that I have no way of quantifying my condition other than mocks and I am too afraid to give mocks, and they will take a lost of time. And speaking logically, the emotional blow from a fucked up performance has a very high of hindering my progress and crippling my motivation, and thus I have convinced myself to forgo mocks. Rationally speaking I must maximize the mocks, but I have mentioned the caveat which lies, what I cannot do is give up. I must study. Keep on studying. Study no matter what. Study however. But study. Work with pen. Watch videos. It doesn't matter. I have to study. I have to give my full efforts, as much as I can. That's the best thing. And the rest of it I have to bet on luck and my mental performance while giving the paper, I have to maximize that. I will not be able to do jackshit in the exams in the time which is left, that's the truth, and in a month you cannot do jackshit either. But I will have to play on the only thing which I have, my mind, i will have to pray and make sure it works in the Advanced, simultaneously I will have to prepare myself emotionally for the blow that will come with the failure, because there are high chances. Then I will have to bludgeon and carry on anyhow. I will have to keep working hard. There is no other way. I will have to go to therapy, by now my mind has completely bifurcated into two personalities, and the bitch pussy crying voice will gave to be cured and dealt with, else it endangers the survival of us both. I will have to stidy. I will have to work hard. I will have to be me. I will have to be rational. I will have to be more emotionally intelligent. I will have to know to select feelings carefully. I will have to be present and hyper aware of everything. The alternative is a very dark path. Well my mind is opting for that alternative because life seems darker. The problem is that I don't feel anything. I am an amalgamation of basic animal instincts of survival and ambition coupled with executive functions and logical side, and I am as much part of myself as the emotional side is. And I see no logical sense to give up, because all the logic is pretty much predicated around survival and increasing entropy of the universal system; and I am a microcosm in my own right, a system of my own and my stability and survival and success is what all the reasoning is fundamentally based on - ergo, dying and giving up is not an option. The emotional side has to be modulated and controlled. I will have to logically induce emotions that will drive me and efficiently deal with and soothe the negative emotions, I will have to validate many scary emotions but at the same time I will have to completely reject, invalidate, ignore, and forcibly stop multiple emotions from festering, which is not healthy for normal people, but I do not lie within the norm if the norm is overall absence of stark dissatisfaction and disillusionment with life. That being said I do not think I am in a position to attempt studying, and it is incredibly hard to determine whether this is the bitch voice or the logical voice speaking. I do not think I will be able to nap either. But I do presume similar conditions will follow me while giving exams because past patterns do not support me being in the best condition while giving exams, and this is the best way to segway to positive emotions. Fuck it I am going to study. I feel tired. Everything is impossible. But I will study. When Thor has to slay Jormungandr he knows he is going to die, but he wields his mighty hammer and accepts his destiny and valiantly fights the great serpent, and dies. I am going to do the same. I know I will fail. I will grieve. I will cry. But not give up. I know cards are stacked up against me. But i will not give up. If I fight against overwhelming odds enough number of times then I will learn to create miracles, and that is a divine power in it's own right. I will learn to create miracles. I will fight against all odds and I might win, or I might lose. But I will keep on struggling, and eventually I will be the miracle maker. What if I fail to make any miracles??? Well, what were the chances that I was born as a dog? Or I was a table? Or I was nothing. My very existence is a miracle and I will create miracle. Humans were fish struggling on land and now they are off to conquer stars!!!!!! This is a miracle!!! Everything was pointless but we kept on struggling!!!! We achieved more than what we could think!!! Why must I give up!!!! Fuck it guys let me overdose myself with caffine and start studying the fuck. Imma do organic revision and pyqs. Organic ke behenchod sare 20 sal ke paper aaj hi nipta dunga madarchod ab bolo koi mock mock (I know it's not possible, but what did I say??) Ya fir definite. Aod. Rotation. Kuch nahi padhunga lekin padhunga aur is bhakalnde behen ke lode exhausted ass state mein padhunga ma chod dunga jindagi ki behen ki chut. Bollo bhagwati maiyaaa ki jai!!!

Bhai ye bakchodi bahot ho gayi ye thode log aakar ek cheez bolte hai inse number poocho to 200 aate the aur 3 4 saal ke droppers hote hai aur random yt inst comment utha ke bolte hai leak hua har saal ye leak to hogai hi aur jab inse kabo un scammers ko pakdho to nhi ji scammers ko kyn pakhde wE wAnT ReNEeT humare 100 number isliye aae kynki leak ho gaya aur jab indian country chodte hai phir log popchte hai kyn choda

Dear (bsdk teri ma ki chut) nta SALLE TERI GAND MEIN DANDA BSDK EK PAPER CONDUCT NHI KRWA SKTA SALLE SAAL MEIN EK BAAR TERI MA KA BHOSDA HO JATA HAI KYA … TERE DIRECTOR KI MA RANDI KHANDAN PE KEEDE PADEIN TERE BACHO KO KAHI ADMISSION NA MILE SADAK PE AAJAO TUM SAB BSDKWALO GAND MARAO thank you

Practical bsc statistics
Anyone from bsc statistics aaj applied statistics ka practical tha mere college mai lkin mere class k grp mai ladki nai grp k description Mai date daal rkhi thi 10 may jbki 9may ko hona tha exam or mujhe lga kl exam hai isliye vo Aaj exam Mera chut ab kya hoga koi bta skta hai😭😭. I am scared Sem 2 ab bta skta hai ki agr Mai pass ho skti hu ya nhi😭😭

Anyone from bsc statistics aaj applied statistics ka practical tha mere college mai lkin mere class k grp mai ladki nai grp k description Mai date daal rkhi thi 10 may jbki 9may ko hona tha exam or mujhe lga kl exam hai isliye vo Aaj exam Mera chut ab kya hoga koi bta skta hai😭😭. I am scared Sem 2

yaar maine bohot bada chutiyapa kara, meri zoology almost poori chut gayi(OMR me mark karna chuut gaya,I am not sure maine kitne kare as soon as mera omr le liya tha ma rone lag gaya aur apna gala ghot kar suicide karne ka attempt kara, maine dhyaan hi nhi diya ma konse question par tha but if I were to guess maine 15 q attempt kar liye the). aisa isliye kyuki maine ek bkl jo vomit kar rha tha aur ro rha tha washroom me (woh washroom me tha aur mai bhi washroom exam ke beech me mootne ke liye chala gya) ma usse samhalne lag gaya. because of that I lost about 5-7 minutes. I know ye bohot chutiya decision tha magar maine bholepan chutiyepanne me kar diya. I thought ki this was something a certain religious person from the religion I believe in would do at that moment aur mere man me adhyatamik gyaan pura bhar gaya aur maine apna career uss ke chakkar me barbaad kar diya. But there is a sliver of hope ki mera ab bhi cmc Ludhiana me ho jaaye, magar problem ye ha ki ma nhi chahta reservation ke through mera admission ho, ma ab bhi chahta hu ki ma pura proper tareeke se drop lekar ke agle saal GMC ke liye prepare karu. Ma CMC ludhiana ki fees afford kar sakta hu magar mujhe tab bhi bohot guilt ha. Agar ma pura paper kar deta toh mere 630 aa jaate which is lower than my state's cutoff, I dont want reservation waali seat. magar papa maan nhi rhe, woh bohot gussa ha aur woh toh pehle se hi mere waha seat ke liye logo se baatein kar rhe the. When I told him what I felt about reservation, woh aur gussa ho gaye aur unko lag rha ha ki ma ungrateful hu aur mujhe jo privilege mil rha ha ma usko accept nhi kar rha aur ye bewkoofi ha, plus he put his sweat and tears meeting people for the sake of my admission. mujhe pata tha pehle hi ki mujhe tab hi rok dena chahiye tha papa ko magar ma sure tha ki mera ache se gmc ho jaayega. Woh bilkul bhi interested nhi ha mere drop me aur woh chahte ha ki ma iss saal cmc ludhiana me admission kara lu ma ussme bilkul bhi interested nhi hu because of the above mentioned guilt I feel ki mere unreserved friends ka nhi hoga magar mera ho jaayega. Magar mere paas ek plan ha ki ma suicide fake karu (ma apne daadi ke ghar jaa rha hu, mai waha par harpic ki bottle ko pura flush kar dunga aur voluntarily vomit karunga, phir harpic ki bottle jameen par hi gira dunga, woh definitely puchenge ki harpic ki bottle waha kaise aayi) aur papa ko emotionally guilt karke drop le lu, but obv moral reasons se woh karne se bhi ma darr rha hu. ma decide nhi kar paa rha between emotionally guilt tripping my father v/s getting GMC(meri self respect aur self image kabhi theek nhi ho paayegi agar mera reservation se hoga) PLEASE HELP ME

Aaj Mera ugee ka exam tha neend time s ni khuli jb khuli tbse bhaga cab Wale to 70-80 ki ride k 500 diye ar vaha bs 10 min s exam chut gya
Bot try Kiya management k saamne roya bhi but mkl aake baat bhi ni kiye call p mana kr diya ar mene bola authority s baat kra do to bola kuch ni ho skta ar phone kaat diya.
Ugee was my last hope ar ab koi option ni h ya to drop leke try kru ya engineering kru ar research wala dream ko dream smjh k bhul jaau
Idk kisko blame kru kya kru raaste bhar rote rote aya puri duniya gaali deri thi exam walo ko but ab kya bolu galti unki bhi ni h.
I wish paise hote to kbhi itna torture ni hota m seedha foreign m apply krta. Marne ka bhi option ni h maa baap ka akela hu unko kon smbhalega. Vit m pta ni research bs bolne ki h ya such m kuch hoga? I wish I could restart this day again

Aaj Mera ugee ka exam tha neend time s ni khuli jb khuli tbse bhaga cab Wale to 70-80 ki ride k 500 diye ar vaha bs 10 min s exam chut gya
Bot try Kiya management k saamne roya bhi but mkl aake baat bhi ni kiye call p mana kr diya ar mene bola authority s baat kra do to bola kuch ni ho skta ar phone kaat diya.
Ugee was my last hope ar ab koi option ni h ya to drop leke try kru ya engineering kru ar research wala dream ko dream smjh k bhul jaau
Idk kisko blame kru kya kru raaste bhar rote rote aya puri duniya gaali deri thi exam walo ko but ab kya bolu galti unki bhi ni h.
I wish paise hote to kbhi itna torture ni hota m seedha foreign m apply krta. Marne ka bhi option ni h maa baap ka akela hu unko kon smbhalega. Vit m pta ni research bs bolne ki h ya such m kuch hoga? I wish I could restart this day again