Hi everyone! Long time lurker, first time poster.
Like the title says, I'm stuck in a tough situation with my (24F) boyfriend (21M) of ten months and... well, I don't really know what to do, if anything. This is going to be a lengthy post!
To give some important background: We are a mostly medium distance couple. We go to different colleges, about four hours away from each other, but during breaks he moves back home to his family, which is the same town I live in. During this last school year we were visiting each other every weekend, which honestly proved to be way too stressful and overwhelming for me. Now it's summer, though and, like I said, he's back here living with his family for the break. We met last summer and our honeymoon phase was great! Lots of good sex, fun dates, and really just excitement from being so into someone, but the honeymoon phase is over now and I'm seeing some hugely glaring issues.
We, or I guess mostly I, have been having issues since spring break when he came to stay with me for the week. Seems like a dream come true for a medium-distance couple, right? Wrong!!! I felt so smothered that at one point even him touching me felt like acid. On top of this experience, I had a really demanding spring semester, I started a new SSRI, and all those months of having little to no alone time because I was spending every single weekend (literally Thursday night to Sunday morning) with him was starting to burn me out. This is probably a good time to mention that I struggle with avoidant attachment tendencies. I had to learn independence at a young age, so when things get hard or overwhelming I go inward every single time. I have been actively working on being more comfortable with vulnerability, but I still don't like to share my feelings until I've figured out what they are and where they're coming from. He, on the other hand, struggles with anxious attachment and has never been in a relationship with someone who is avoidant (or someone who is neurodivergent, like I am). This leads us misunderstanding each other pretty often.
After spring break, we texted each other less and less and when we did text it was almost entirely NPC dialogue. "Hey, how are you?" "I'm good! How are you?" "Aw, that's good. I'm good :) My day was really good." And not much else. I was starting to feel... flighty and trapped, but I didn't know why so I never told him and I didn't think the feeling would manifest into anything.
Then one weekend in April he came to stay the weekend with me. This was a rough time. My grandmother was staying with me, visiting from out of state, it was show week for a production I had been working on almost all semester (theatre ppl know how fucking stressful show week can be), and I was preparing for finals. I was also feeling some side effects from my Lexapro, like no sex drive and emotional blunting. Over the weekend he begged me for sex, which I gave into a couple of times just so he would stop whining, but one night in particular really upset me because he legitimately would not stop. I would try to change the subject, and within two minutes he'd say something like, "Give me two reasons you don't want to have sex!" When I held my boundary firm, he pouted and went to bed. After he went home for the week, he acknowledged that what he did was not cool and apologized, but I could not look at him the same after that. My feelings of being smothered and trapped only intensified. About a week after that, we had an honest discussion about my feelings and mutually decided to go on a break so that we could both focus on our finals.
I had been feeling like there has to be something wrong with me, like these relationship issues are happening because I'm of flawed character or something, but during our break I started to feel better than I have this entire year so far and I realized that there's nothing actually wrong with me, I'm just 24 years old and out of the six years I've officially been an adult, I've spent probably five and a half years in three relationships. I realized that I want to be my own person and that I want to decenter both men and romantic relationships all together in my life.
Here's where we get into the problem at hand.
I tried to break up with him when summer break started and we saw each other in person for the first time in two weeks. I realized that doing what is best for me was going to inevitably result in him being neglected and resenting me. I don't want that to happen! I told him that I didn't think we were on the same page and that we're more incompatible than I thought, but he disagreed and basically said he would sacrifice anything to be with me. I told him I don't want to be in an unbalanced relationship like that, but we stayed together. We agreed that I would do whatever it is that I need to do to satisfy my craving for independence and he will just sit back, and he's okay with that as long as he "doesn't lose [me]".
That was almost three weeks ago and my feelings of suffocation subsided for a bit, but they're back in full force after an argument we got into last week about some stupid miscommunication. We've barely been texting, mostly just good morning/good night stuff, and we haven't seen each other at all, He wants to come spend the night in a few days, but I'm not even sure if I want him to.
Don't get me wrong, I love him (I think I do, anyway) and neither of us have done anything wrong to the other person.
You're probably like, "Girl, break up with him already," which, yeah, I agree, but like I said I tried and got nowhere. I have a feeling that breaking up is going to be almost impossible, unless he somehow comes to see my point of us being incompatible. I honestly don't believe that he's going to be okay with me doing what I want to do, focusing on myself, decentering our relationship from my life, because it is going to end up with him feeling neglected. It would look like us talking to each other very little, seeing each other even less, and me not having sex unless I want to (which is going to be very, very little because of the Lexapro impacting my sex drive). I know these things are going to bother him, especially the sex.
Is it manipulative to go through with our plan of me doing "whatever" to focus on myself when I feel like the result is going to be him feeling insecure in our relationship? I tried to tell him, to get him to think about it, but he feels so strongly that it won't impact him negatively. It's not like I'm purposefully trying to get him to break up with me, but another part of me doesn't really care if he does-- even maybe hopes that he does (idk, feelings I haven't analyzed yet). I don't feel strongly enough to try to break up with him a second time yet... but maybe I should? I know that we will, sooner or later.
But, maybe this is me overanalyzing everything. Or maybe I'm a villain, I honestly can't tell.
TLDR;
Tried to break up with BF over basic incompatibility (I want to be independent and focus on myself, he wants a committed relationship), BF says he's fine with me doing whatever I feel like I need to do to focus on myself, but I know that it's going to make him feel insecure and anxious over time. I feel like we will break up sooner or later, but I don't feel strongly enough to try to break up with him a second time. Is it manipulative to go through with our plan of me focusing on myself even though I know it will come at a detriment to our relationship, and maybe secretly hope that it does, to make him see our incompatibilities?
Thank you <3

Hi- need serious advice. I know this is a novel, I’m so sorry but I would appreciate anyone who reads it. I’m a 20 yr old F and I live with my brother, 19 M, and my two parents. My parents are abusive. There is no way to get around it. Physically when I was young and mentally now. I can’t describe what they put me through now- it’s awful. I promised myself all throughout high school I would leave the moment I turned 18 but something kind of switched and they became more tolerable, almost nicer, so like a fucking idiot I stayed. I started my bachelors, started working and tried to convince myself it was alright. The other reason I stayed was for my brother. I’ve taken care of him my whole life. I didn’t have any other choice, and I didn’t think I wanted one. It was my duty to take care of him and I did my job as best as I could only being 11 months older. I have gotten in the middle of fights, taken beatings, punishments, paid for him, drove him, etc. Time and money I didn’t have to spare spent on him with no repayment, and I’m talking about he wanted a new $60 game so I asked him to help me while I cleaned my room (vacuuming, taking down dirty clothes, wiping down my fan). This has been going on for years. I was the one to complete his college essay, to call his advisors to get his transcripts, to do his homework, otherwise my ass was on the line with my parents. I have done everything I could for him. Plus, he didn’t even get into college because I told him he had to complete his 200 word prompt for his college application, leading him not to get accepted because he didn’t fucking do it. He’s in his first year while I’m almost in my fourth. I have had jobs for the last 3 years in my field while he has done nothing. I begged my parents for a car and drivers license for 2 1/2 years while he, at 19, only got his 4 months ago. He does the bare minimum. Less than that, actually. The night before fall semester started he got into a fight with my father, physically, left the house, and made me go looking for him and try to convince him to go back home until 5am. To say my semester was fucked after that is an understatement. It’s constant but I stay because I’m his sister. It’s my job. It’s also a cultural thing I guess. I know I’m venting but I’m getting to the point I promise. A month ago I asked him to help me clean my room so that I could study since he has a habit of fucking his room up, coming and staying in my room, taking up my bed, and asking me to buy him food. I had just returned from the library, brought him Taco Bell, and wanted to clean a bit before continuing to study for my final the next day. To be clear, if I didn’t pass this class I wouldn’t be on track to graduate or get into my optometry program. He said he didn’t want to help and bitched and moaned but when I pointed out that I had gone out of my way to get Taco Bell for him he agreed to aid. I asked him to just bring up some cleaning stuff and take down my clothes so I could have them clean for work and he left. After an hour or so of waiting for him (yes I was procrastinating and purposely didn’t ask why he was taking so long) I heard him come upstairs with a plate full of sandwiches and go into his room. I was pissed. I started to text him, angrily and cursing I’ll admit, about him not doing shit and being so annoying. I called him a bum for never following on his promises or doing absolutely fucking anything. He started texting in all caps not to call him that otherwise he swore to god I would regret it, and I, being the person that I am (a fucking idiot) called him it again. He rushed out of his room, kicked open my door and threw his phone at me as hard as he could and left me with a bruise. He started standing over me, threatening me, saying shit like he was going to throw me done the stairs, snap my neck, etc. I’ve seen him get that way before- he smashes shit to pieces, breaks anything in his sight, and generally destroys things. For some context he’s a big guy, almost 300lb and used to be able to deadlift 500+lb. I got scared, saw a knife on my counter from dishes I had yet to clean, and pulled it on him. He slowly backed off and went to his room, before I, again, a fucking idiot, called him a bum again. A stupid decision, I know, I would definitely be the bitch that got knifed in a movie and you’d cheer for her death. This time I closed the door before he could come in, he tried to break down the door while I was on the other side, and in response he smashed something made of glass on the other side and punched a hole in my door. I contacted my dad who was far away and he sent my mother home. My mother and I haven’t spoken to each other in a few months since she called me a burden for asking her to help me get my work clothes ready for the week. She came in, spoke to my brother I guess, then came in and spoke to me. She said it was unbelievable and she didn’t know what to say and when I explained what happened and then told me to study for my test. She also went back to talk to him and came back to talk with me, asking me if I pulled a knife on him, which I admitted to, only because I was seriously afraid of him pushing me down the stairs or knocking me out. After that I locked the door and when texting my parents about the situation they only told me not to worry about it, just study. I couldn’t, and I swear to god I tried, all night. I was scared and I think in shock. I got to the lecture hall early and tried to study there but that didn’t help either. I had done alright in the class, done very well in the lab, but knew I bombed the final. I went home and didn’t speak to anyone at home for days. After about 3 days I went downstairs and saw my dad who tried to act like it wasn’t a big deal. I explained how insane and irrational the entire situation was and how I wanted to move out. I couldn’t handle dealing with all of their shit, and if I was the problem like they said I was then I would be fixing that too. I have a very important board exam this summer that I also have to take to get into optometry school and I proposed that I would live on campus, only for the summer. He refused, angrily saying that it wasn’t me place to move out, that he would never support me, and that if that’s what I wanted to do I could get the fuck out right now. A few things- I pay partially for my school. I don’t make much but I put a lot of what I do have toward school and the rest towards little things for me and my brother. Secondly, almost every single thing within my bedroom I have paid for. Excluding the mattress, furniture, and my phone, I have paid for everything I need or want through hard work. Thirdly, both my parents are currently unemployed but wealthy. Wealthy enough that they can go on vacations, pay for four cars, go out with their friends, and pay for their son’s tuition with no hassle. It’s only mine that poses a problem, which is the reason they let me work. They attempt to dictate how I should spend my money constantly. The argument went on for an hour, him accusing me of failing because I chose to, him proposing that he get a lock for my door, telling me I could move into the basement, etc. When my father refused to budge I went upstairs, used a loc that I had bought for when your staying at a hotel to barricade the door and have not spoken to him since. It has been a month now and I have not spoke to anyone in person, though my mother has been trying to guilt me into making me give up my refrigerator in my room by telling me my grandfather is in hospice, there will be a funeral soon, and me having that fridge is making me too fat to be presentable, as well as trying to be nice and hugging me when I have to leave for work in the morning. Now, with all of that context, here’s what’s going on. Since the entire incident happened I have been trying to figure out a way to leave. I have looked into campus housing but it’s an additional $7000 per semester that I don’t think I can afford even if I take out student loans and do FAFSA. I’m scared of the position. It’ll put me in when it comes to going to school. I do have another choice though. I recently toured an apartment complex that is beautiful it’s my dream place and the rent is less than $1500 a month. The only problem is that I only currently make being part time 12 to 1300 a month I just got a raise to $18 an hour but even then that’s not gonna be enough to cover it if I’m going to school at the same time, I’ve looked into some options and FAFSA and loans wouldn’t be able to cover any of my housing outside of living on campus. The only problem with living on campus is I can’t make the morning drive less than an hour and a half to work and I’m afraid with how it all affect my schedule and will to study. I was honestly giving up the idea of moving out at all because it seems so impractical and there was no way that I could actually leave and take my stuff with me without a fight. However, I recently learned that my parents tomorrow are leaving on a five day vacation to Vegas with Little to no thought of how that affects me and the position that I’m in with my brother, if I can figure out a way to somehow be able to afford the rent for this place afford a car to get to work because we have really bad public transportation in my area then I think I would just drop out of school and go. I love optometry more than anything and that’s why I was willing to deal with all of this but maybe school just isn’t in the cards for me. I don’t want to give it up but I don’t think that I’ll make it out of here alive, in all honesty. I can’t keep up with everything it’s ruining my life and I’m only 20 years old. But it’s so scary that I don’t know if I can even take the steps to moving out. I just paid tuition for the spring summer semester and have only $500 to my name. I would need to take out a loan to be able to put down the down payment for the car and the apartment and what if I don’t get approved? What if my work doesn’t give me full-time? what am I gonna do then? I don’t have anybody in my life that could help me. I also have a big family that would all be on their side and agree with them and what if I leave and they come back and cause a scene that causes me to lose my job? They would 100% do that. I know for some people it’s a no brainer but put yourself in my shoes. I have no money, family, friends, or support. At least here I have car and my room and sometimes they’re tolerable. I would only have to do it for 1-2(?) more years. On the other hand, this place is destroying me. I hate who I am becoming because of it. Would it be worth giving up my future for getting my dreams or moving out? If you read all of this you’re amazing, thank you so much. I can only stare at a pros and cons list for so long 🙃

**Sorry i wanted to post this article in two communities. I hope this is not a problem 😭
Lately the whole typology community has been obsessed with narrowing down possible combinations between types of different typology systems. This tendency, without any exaggerations, has reached a point of absurdity. Unfortunately the majority of community supports the idea of strict archetypes, neglecting the fact that human psyche is not a material thing that can fit into certain categories. Our consciousness surely can be characterised by some definitions or dichotomies, nonetheless all typology systems were inherently created to describe mental processes, not to force people fit into specific categorisations. All sciences change their theories if they don’t correspond to reality - for some reason this rule is not applied in typology. The community decided that we have to adjust people’s identities to fit into some rules that are not always correct.
Of course, some combinations are obviously not possible, but that absolutely doesn’t mean that we have to get rid of almost every correlations. Borders between various typology systems are not precise since each of them focuses on its own peculiar studies of human personality. This is the reason why sometimes it’s just impossible to amalgamate some typology methods to create a correlation between them.
In this article i want to talk about IEI so4 archetype and its combinations with types of attitudinal psyche method of typology.
First of all let’s emphasise that 4th enneagram type belongs to heart triad. This means that individuals who identify themselves with this enneatype can only be ethical types in socionics. Considering the fact that 4th enneagram type is also known as a withdrawn one, individuals who associate themselves with this enneatype are most likely to be introverts.
Now let’s dive deeper into details of social subtype. I want to quote a description from this website: “The social instinct motivates us to create relationships and care for the wellbeing of others. It includes our desire to positively enhance the lives of those we care for. When sensitive to the social instinct, we’re interested and curious about people beyond what they can be or do for us. The social drive is what helps us to assess who is and who isn’t a worthy friend, ally or partner, without losing sight of the humanity of anyone we may be in conflict with.”
Description of So-IV subtype by Claudio Naranjo: “Social Fours develop mechanisms for calling negative attention to themselves. The shyest of the Four subtypes. There's a shame about desiring, about "loving." Proust is filled with the social envy of the person dazzled by the "aristocracy," who has a passion for being "in", who wants to be included, to receive their favors. A feeling of "I'm nothing," "I'm ugly," "I'm silly." Fours in general want to absorb through their gaze, but this is especially true for the Social Four”
I think both of aforementioned citations are without any doubt correlated to the Fe-function in ego-block position: “Fe is generally associated with the ability to recognize and convey (i.e. make others experience) passions, moods, and emotional states, … , recognize and describe emotional interaction between people and groups, and build a sense of emotional unity.” - desertion is taken from this website:
We can conclude that So-4 enneagram subtype strives to share own emotions with others, in other words to evoke certain impressions in the public. It means that such individuals are focused on their emotional impact on others. This statement also corresponds to the description of the emotional aspect in the 2nd position, which is conscious, extroverted and subjective: “Second Emotions provoke the expression of reactions, showdown. They encourage acting in other people.” - https://wiki.personality-database.com/books/psychosophy-attitudinal-psyche/page/emotion
Now let’s discuss why IEI So-4 individuals may have the volitional aspect in the 4th position. Description of 4V: “The Fourth Will becomes weak-willed, waiting for decisions and active actions from others... Such individual can take the lead, but only if he is “assigned” by those around him, but hardly of his own free will, because he does not like to strain and bear responsibility too much. There is an opinion that the Fourth Wills have no ambitions - this is not so. But it is easier for them to realize their ambitions alone, without responsibility “for a common cause”. In addition, 4V can be “infected” with your dreams and plans with prolonged exposure”.
Aforesaid statement is almost identical to the definition of suggestive Se:
“He is additionally very indecisive. He may lack the ability to make important decisions, especially with regards to his own future. He may know what he wants to achieve out of life in a broad or long term sense, but will find it very difficult to set and finish the short term projects leading to it. In order to be able to act, he needs a tangible and definite stimulus from somebody well grounded in external reality and who has a clear picture of what must be done in a certain situation.”
All these arguments indicate that IEI So-4 archetype can be not only an ExVx in attitudinal psyche typology system, but also an xExV.
Thanks for your attention !!!!

If someone could share their insight on this because I’m genuinely confused — kinda long, sorry in advance
I(30F) met this guy(30M) on tinder 3 months ago, we hit it off right away and had a date planned by the end of the week. Mind you his profile said that he was looking for long term and I had mine set to still figuring it out. Everything seemed to be going really really well. We started staying at each others houses by week 3/4 and 2 months in we both confirmed that we deleted tinder and were basically exclusive to each other. We had scheduled days on the weekend when we would see each other, I dropped him off at the airport for a work training, we talked every night, we would cook dinners for each other and together, he would take candid pictures of me and send them to me saying I was beautiful. All of his actions up until recently seemed like he would be ready to be long term with me and he even talked about it with me. I told him in the beginning that I usually like to wait 3 months to date someone and he had told me he usually would wait a month and when a month came around I said I knew I wanted to date him already but he insisted we waited the 3 months since that’s what I said. I said sure since I was the one who suggested it. All within the 3 months though he bought flights/stay for us to go to New York, I bought us tickets to a Yankees game, and he even bought a scrunchie(I have a thing to match them with my outfits) in my favorite color, put it in a box, and asked me to be his girlfriend Monday, the day we were leaving for New York. When he asked me to be his girlfriend he even said, “I bought the scrunchie 2 months ago but the box took long as hell to get here”. A few time before this we have talked about dating and I would tell him if we came back from New York and I wasn’t made his girlfriend that I would feel like going any longer without a relationship would be pointless after 3 months. So fast forward to this past Thursday when we got back, I leave his house to go home, he kisses me goodbye says to text him when I get home and that he’ll come over later so we can spend time at my house. Its now 8pm and he still hasn’t mentioned coming over but has been texting me so I ask if he was going to come over and he said that he was going to stay at his house and that he will see me tomorrow instead. Friday comes and I think things are kind of weird because he’s never not wanted to come over. We text as we normally do Friday and then around 640 he says, “I’ve been meaning to call and talk to you but I’ve been feeling weird lately, I don’t know what it is but it’s been since Monday” so I ask him, “Do you feel like you’re not ready to be in a relationship? ” and he hits me with “I think it might be that. It’s not like I was rushed at all but I knew I was running out of time”. I was floored and didn’t know what to say back so I just asked if he wanted to break up, he said he wanted to talk about it tomorrow. I tell him I feel stupid and he said that I shouldn’t, that he feels stupid and that he would call me in the morning(all this was over text too which pissed me off). On Saturday morning he ended up leaving me a voice message saying not much other than he was sorry it ended this way and that it came out of no where for him to and that it I needed anything I could reach out to him anddd that he didn’t get what talking on the phone would do but “yeah I’ll talk to you later”. So with all of this, I’m super confused because even after I called him anyways he didn’t clarify anymore on why he suddenly doesn’t want to date me all he kept saying was that it was hard to explain and that it could be that he’s not ready or could be that he’s been feeling this way subconsciously, everything was a maybe this or that but nothing for certain and he even said that it wasn’t easy for him and then just said he was done talking in circles and that he couldn’t explain it any differently, that I just wasn’t willing to accept it. quite literally that Sunday before we left to New York and before he asked me to be his girlfriend was the Yankees game and he kept saying how much fun he had and calling me his number one priority…
So does anyone have any insight on what could be going on here?
I’m really sorry for how long this is!

5 months post-break up. I’ve posted in detail about this many times but in summary, my ex (29M) and I (27F) were long distance for 2.5 years. I was at the stage of sorting visas/jobs to move to him when he said he wasn’t ready to commit or be in a relationship. Really devastated me and flipped my life upside down at a critical point of my life. He breadcrumbed me hard the first couple months. I blocked him for a while. April 3rd, we started talking again and we both said our feelings were still the same and were open to the idea of seeing where things go. All of a sudden he shut down again and we stopped talking April 13.
I messaged him on April 29 and he said he doesn’t feel the same way, doesn’t love me, miss me or feel sad etc. He wants a relationship with gender roles. A full 180 in a couple of weeks. He also said he hadn’t been with anyone new. A couple of days later, his family blocked/deleted me off social media which actually really upset me and seemed so out of the blue because they were liking my posts just a couple of weeks before and I had a good relationship with them. I was so confused. Obviously, one didn’t get the memo and I saw a video they posted of my ex with his new chick at a family dinner on May 10. I think that was the worst moment of this whole breakup because there was no warning and he lied and told me he hadn’t been with anyone less than 2 weeks before. I didn’t expect it at all.
I did some digging and this girl is 21/22, still in college. He started following her mid April, right when he shut down again with me. This guy has a fear of commitment and the mind of a little boy so someone that young and inexperienced who hasn’t figured out their life yet is PERFECT for him. He’s got about 5 years to figure his shit out before she starts asking to settle down. At first I was inconsolable that he moved on that fast and forced his family to block me so I wouldn’t see. It wasn’t to protect my feelings. It was to protect his guilt and reputation. I was plagued with the thoughts of “does he say the things he said to me? Does he call her my pet names? Has he taken her to our places?” But honestly now, I think this has really helped me move on. What a LOSER! It’s actually hilariously embarrassing 😂 All the tears and intrusive thoughts about this pathetic human who doesn’t give a damn about me. I’m sorry but your feelings cannot change that quickly. You can’t say after months you still feel the same way and want to maybe try again and then 10 days later, your feelings are dead. This man has so many issues that he has not worked on so I’m sure this relationship will fizzle out as he is incapable of having a healthy one. I really was struggling with no contact but I have no desire whatsoever anymore. I’m not sure if he knows I know. But why lie? That’s the part I don’t get? You can tell me how little I mean to you, so why not say you’re seeing someone new? What is wrong with him???
Anyone have a similar experience? Do you think he’s really gotten over me or is this a distraction? He’s severely avoidant. He literally told me “I’ve been pushing down feelings my whole life, this was just another I needed to overcome”. Part of me feels he’ll reach out one day and part of me wants him to so I can laugh in his face. Anyway, I’m off to disappear into the abyss. Good luck you POS. Thanks for nothing.

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Memory Transcription Subject: Hileen, Krakotl Fugitive Recovery Agent
Date [standardized human time]: November 28th, 2136
It'd been a while since I sat in Marlig's office for a talk face-to-face. Given the agency's secluded location at the edge of the downtown region, it was a chore to drop by when it wasn't for business, but I'd deemed the matter at hand to be worth my time.
I passed by Nampi at her desk on my way to the door and she gave me a coy glare as I carried on. Trying to ignore her risible ear waggle, I turned the corner to the door with my boss’s name painted on the glass panel where I could hear the frantic crumpling of paper.
Quietly, I entered Marlig's office without prompt as I knew he hated to be spooked by knocking. My mentor was surprisingly spry for a bird at his age, sorting through papers with one wing and an eye while using his talons with the other to set away the papers he had splayed out.
“Hileen!” he chirped. “Glad you could make it in today. I was just finishing up my paperwork. Take a seat.”
It was always nice to hear him drop the professional motif for a more grandfatherly attitude when speaking in person. I did as he suggested and took a seat while he grumbled to himself over the sorting. My eye caught a few of the old contracts he was rifling through and saw that some dated back to his days as an agent.
Eventually, he left some sitting out as he sequestered the rest back into their files, sorted by a dichotomy that only he and Nampi could comprehend fully. He motioned with a wing for me to peruse and I turned the first one to face me to find it was my first contract, signed by me in a sloppy fashion. “This takes me back a couple of years.”
“Slick bastard thought he could get away on a forklift but you showed him! Certainly more exciting than my first day!”
“Mm-hmm. And it was when I nearly got impaled that you had the idea to commission all of us utility vests.”
He chuckled, “I really should’ve done so sooner. Cuts and scratches were already a risk, but a forklift was a new one!”
I flipped through the pages of each report, finding that Marlig's notes were filled with praises of my work. There were highs and lows, but I was flattered to find that the grizzled krakotl held my performance in such high regard.
“Flawless interception!” read one footnote about me catching a runner. “Couldn't have done it better myself!”
Marlig waited patiently as I browsed quickly through each page, realizing more and more how the notes also marked improvements in my work. How I found it easier to talk down a rowdy client, or apprehend them in the case that they were beyond helping on my part. Flowery language plastered most pages with him fawning over my work as a doting father would to his prodigal child.
The trend took a sharp turn as the notes became fewer and more critical the closer the dates reached to the present. I brushed the others aside with a wing to peruse the final paper. “And this…”
“Is Tac. Your latest contract. The most recent in a line of declining performance since the interview. This has become a pattern, Hileen, and its consequences are beginning to reach beyond yourself. Paji and Vesek resigned recently for personal reasons, which leaves us even less hands on deck than before. That's four people to cover the entire municipal region, and maybe even beyond, should needs arise. Three, if we include this little probation I have you on.”
“What was I supposed to do? Marlig, these ‘jobs’ you've got us working on overstep the contracts we were signed on with. Our job is to make sure people obey their court-mandated duties, not drag them off to the facilities ourselves!”
“... So the trip we took to the facilities did bother you.”
A sigh clicked in my throat as he reminded me. “Is that what happens to the people we take in, Marlig? Is that what would've happened to your wife?”
His feathers ruffled.
“That's what happens to those who are too dangerous to the general public to be left roaming free. Not everyone we deal with winds up there, but everyone can be subject to it. Miskela sued for her exoneration and proved in court that she was not diseased. I brought you there to show you how it helps the people, but I see now that it was a mistake. I understand why you were so perturbed, really, but it's how things have been for centuries. It's how we've protected ourselves from the dangers out there.”
“You were willing to let Barsul be interned there, too.”
Marlig flinched and sighed as he swept the papers towards himself once I'd signaled I was done. He turned one eye to me while he sorted them.
“There's no room for favoritism, girl. I negotiated for him to be allowed to walk free, and look where that got me. That boy - your neighbor - suffered the consequences of my nepotism. So too would the girl, had nobody intervened.”
“Like Richard.”
“The human, yes. Or you. Or the police. Where does this sudden obsession with humans come from, anyway? I get notifications of you talking about the acceptance of them all the time on forums.”
“Does it even need explaining?”
“Well, I guess not, no, but it's certainly an about-face from the way you used to talk about them with me beforehand.”
“People can change, for better or worse. Which one I fall under remains to be seen.”
Marlig stroked at the plumage on his neck as he finished his sorting. “I hope it's the former, for your sake. Was there any reason you came to talk, or were you just checking that I hadn't gone senile?”
“Well, I was hoping to borrow your secretary for the evening.”
He perked up while his eyes narrowed and he laced his fingers together with curiosity. “You… want to spend an evening with Nampi?”
“It's not what you're insinuating, but yes.”
“I was insinuating nothing,” he warbled coyly. “Go ahead and take her, and make sure to split the bill at dinner.”
“Pain-in-the-ass geezer. I'll keep in touch if your friend causes any more trouble.”
“Keep in touch regardless. Miskela and I get lonely in our old age,” he called back. “Take care.”
I stepped out into the hallway and turned toward the desk where I could hear the secretary's claws tapping furtively at her keyboard. Nampi sat silently with her ears and tail in a relaxed position that implied a bored demeanor. There was barely any response as I stood before her, waiting politely for her acknowledgment that never came.
Hesitantly, I cleared my throat.
An ear raised in acknowledgement, but her focus remained on the screen of her computer. “Mhm?”
“Do you…?”
Her ear rotated toward me, though she still maintained a passive attitude as she continued to glare mindlessly at the monitor.
“Are you free this evening?”
“Well, I'm quite booked, I believe. Why do you ask?”
I was surprised at her curt, dry tone. She hadn't spoken with me like this since we first got to know one another.
“Well,” I started. “I realized something. Every time we went out, whether it was clubbing, or dinner, or even walking around the parks, you always footed the bill. And so…”
Slowly, her other ear perked up and I saw her keystrokes slow down as she listened in.
“I wanted to return the favor?”
Her lips smacked as she opened her mouth, though paused before she spoke. “How could you possibly do that?”
“With a little gesture of friendship.”
Nampi's horizontal pupil turned up toward me and her tail twitched.
I continued, “So that belt you're wearing? It's the same belt you've worn since we first met. And I know you're the pragmatic type who'd never spend a credit more than she needs to, except for all the times you do"- her ears twitched in indignance -"I wanted to see about getting you a little something… extra?”
Her paws raised from the keyboard and she leaned in, resting her snout on her palms. “Go on.”
The bubbly venlil's tail sold out her collected facade as it twitched with anticipation. She was cornered and she didn't even know it yet.
“Well, I found just the place on the other side of town where we can start. It's a place almost as rich and indulgent as yourself.”
“The Platinum Paw? I mean3”
Her ears folded back in embarrassment as she cracked. She wasn't cut out for acting anyway.
“So that's what it's called! Jeez, I couldn't for the life of me figure out what it was called. Now what do you say? We go over there and find you something nice—”
I hadn’t even finished my thought before Nampi had grabbed her bag and was out the door, giving me a playful tail flick that said come and get me.

The place I suggested was in a shopping center on the opposite side of town, though easily accessible because of its proximity to the transport rails. Nampi had insisted on grabbing something to eat beforehand and so now gleefully bit into a bundle of stalks that had been “grilled” as explained from the food truck we'd stopped at.
Her tail flicked back and forth with her usual enthusiasm as we entered the massive complex of stores. The roofless plan allowed the natural, orange sun to flood the upper levels while artificial lighting illuminated the ground level wherever the light couldn't reach.
The place was built in the last decade by the previous City Magister in a bid for popularity, though ultimately for naught as he would lose the vote following a scandal involving an iftali priestess and a carved bar of soap. I had to say that despite being sick in the head, he sure had a great sense of decor.
Nampi snacked away, joining me in admiring the scenery as we continued to the place I’d planned out for us. Aimless chatter all melded together into a single, thrumming murmur as pedestrians navigated the many levels and stores offered in the place.
A troupe of children passed by us, held in a chain of tails and arms as they were escorted by a pair of venlil who I assumed were students and teachers on a school trip. I caught a whiff of a sweet, aromatic breeze and found it to come from a perfume shop on the same level as us; naturally, venlil were not to be found inside.
We passed a fountain where a couple sat on the edge, their tails twined together as they giggled and flirted. I turned and caught Nampi watching them as well, though she awkwardly returned to sucking the remains of her meal from her claws when we made eye contact. Her ears lifted when I raised a wing to signal to the store we were going to stop at first.
“Platinum Paw, The Greatest Fashion Emporium For Everyone!”
The title alone was painfully cliche, taken to the tenth power by the brightly lit store taking up three department slots. Despite the flashy exterior, though, it was the best place to shop for belts, brooches, and bracelets alike. Customers who looked like they earned my yearly salary in a week browsed the higher end brands while I brought my friend to the section I wanted to show her.
Her ears were held up as we stood together next to a shelf chock full of fashionable bags and bandoliers of every variety.
“Pick one,” I told her.
Nampi's ears shot to a straight pose in surprise, “Any?”
“Within reason. I've got a few extra credits to blow and I know nobody better to spend it on.”
With an inviting headtilt, I let Nampi peruse the shelves at her leisure. Her lips pursed together and her tail flicked with glee as she fingered at every piece that caught her eye. I chuckled at her outburst of enthusiasm while turning to find my own items to gloss over.
A breeze from outside nipped at my beak while I considered what I’d like to purchase. The place dripped with an atmosphere of faux hospitality, from the bright blue-stained floorboards to the radio prattling off advertisements in a sickeningly sweet tone to the faint, fruity aroma of scented cleaner. It was oppressive as only a fissan-owned company could be to the senses.
What I wouldn’t pay to see how a human would fare in such an environment.
I knew they were social creatures at least, but I had no doubt that the predatory senses of a human, so honed to hunting, would get overstimulated in this center of gaudy indulgence. Knowing I was something of a predator myself made me sympathize provided that even I had to squint to keep the pale lights inside from searing my eyes. I could only imagine how the arboreal eyes of a Terran would fare. I was so lost in thought imagining how lost the Terrans would be that I could almost ignore the obnoxious giggling and metallic rattling coming from behind me.
Risking a peek at the source, into my sight came a pair of venlil, one a male carrying a pair of bags as well as a couple more strapped to his belt. The bored expression in his eyes was not one of a man who was in high spirits. The other venlil was a woman who was the source of the noise.
Her mottled gray pelt was accented by a tasteful belt design, free of almost any practical functions but not flashy or excessive in garnishment either. At least, that’s what I would say, were it not for the braid of beads that dangled on the belt, jingling with each bounce of the lively woman’s stride. It was clear that such a gaudy accessory was intended to draw attention to her, though why was a mystery. Certainly, the shiny braids seemed designed as decoration first and practical second.
She turned about and I faced back to my browsing before she could catch me staring. Nampi was nowhere in sight, though I figured she was somewhere behind the shelf, sifting through every accessory on the section I'd suggested.
Clink.
Something pelted to my immediate right. I tilted my head to spot a tree nut shell clattering to the floor. Without being able to guess where it came from, I had to wonder what could've launched it over this way. Even with my keen eyesight, nobody in the crowd seemed to be a suspect.
Clink.
Another shell pelted my vicinity, ricocheting off of the floor and hitting the shelf I was standing next to. I ruffled my feathers in frustration - clearly, someone was trying to get my attention, though I couldn't make out who it was. Out of the corner of my vision, the woman from before eyed me curiously as I looked about, though I wasn't interested in engaging with her.
Thwack.
One more shell came flying and, unfortunately, the aim on this one was true, nailing me on the beak. Irritated, I stormed out of the store to find the source of the instigator. I scanned over the bodies to find anyone who could've been responsible for this indignity, eventually concluding that it came from the dining area across the walkway.
Whoever was responsible was in for an earful and I was already structuring which of the offender's family members would be acceptable as fodder for stray words. As I approached, I found the tables were mostly empty save for one, which made my heart begin to drop as I met eyes with the only occupant. Suddenly, I was much less inclined to hurl insults.
“Oh, hi there!” Qitel called out in a sickly sweet tone. “Come, take a seat! We have much to discuss!”
The Exterminator clutched a bag of tree nuts in his claws, a pile of discarded shells already gathered on the table next to him. He grabbed another as I approached, effortlessly prying the shell in half between two claws and tossed the contents into his mouth. “Good protein, these,” he commented as I sat down.
“Must be for that good arm you've got there,” I mumbled. I caught sight of a couple of bags beneath his chair, seemingly from one of the tech stores contained within the center.
“Bah, it's guesswork. So how are you? I haven't heard from you since we worked together!”
“I was just spending time with a friend, shopping and enjoying my time off.”
“Your time off? Oh, am I interrupting something?”
His snide tone irked me, though now wasn’t the time for interjections. “You are, Qitel,” I replied with no shortage of vitriol in my tone. “But I see no harm in chatting for a bit.”
“Good, because I have some merchandise”- he reached into his belt pocket and deposited a couple of items onto the table -“and you’re just the person to look into it, human sympathizer.”
I drew a terse breath in shock, but my worries were quelled when I considered that if Qitel had the power to do anything about it, he would’ve done so instead of approaching me so discreetly. A glance down at the item on the table showed that he was presenting what looked to be a tracker as well as a personal drive. “Found in the garbage,” he told me.
“The guild resorts to dumpster diving when they already have such a bloated budget now?”
“No, featherbrain, I have decided to keep this for myself. These items were found together, sealed in a plastic pouch, and placed in a garbage bin. The city has bans against electronics being placed into public bins, and so I was curious why this wound up in there. Managed to get my coworker, a techie, to crack it open and…”
Qitel reached into his belt again, glowering at me with the same condescending gaze he’d given me when I first saw his face. He seemed to revel in digging for the item as slowly as possible to waste my time. Finally, he found whatever he was looking for and revealed it as a printed piece of paper, folded into eighths. The snobby yotul threw the unfurled paper on the table and rolled it toward me.
I craned my neck to look at the parchment, though I was immediately perplexed by the text on it; it appeared to be some sort of form, going by the boxes with words on the inside, followed by blank lines. “Found on the drive, here,” Qitel told me, jabbing a claw to the storage. “Translator shows it as Terran writing.”
Drawing my holopad from my satchel, I held it over the paper with the translator to get an understanding. Surely enough, the language on it came up positive as a variant of Terran writing and I was affirmed in it being a form of some sort based on the wording of the text. The boxes seemed like an odd sort of job application, asking for the typical name, contacts, and prior work experiences, but quickly took a strange turn as it began asking for where their home on Earth was prior to arrival, what family they had on Venlil Prime if any, and where they worked, implying that they were seeking individuals who were already employed.
I knew little about human employment methods, but I didn’t imagine that sourcing individuals from other jobs was the most efficient way to gain a workforce. Terran service industries already dotted the planet while many humans also found work in local environments. So what was the angle that the creator of this application was going for?
Most concerningly was that the paper had no insignia, identifying marks, or noted address to return the form to. “And where did you find it again?”
“In the garbage, alongside this intact tracker that was activated at the time of recovery. Y’know, when I was dumpster diving. Text on the document showed it was addressed to one ‘Choctaw Nexus’.”
“A pseudonym of some sort?”
“Clearly. Short sorting through the archives shows the first name traces back to the group out east - perhaps you've heard about them. How the name and the items we have here are connected is beyond my understanding, but-”
“Well, this has been an absolutely riveting discussion about your collection of trash, Qitel,” I told him as I stood up to leave. “But this really sounds like an issue to be resolved by your fellow guildsmen.”
The sound of another shell splitting rang out as I turned away.
“I'm not through talking with you, predator.”
The sting as a piece nailed me in the back of the head prompted me to whirl back around, sticking my beak in the insolent yotul's snout. “Perhaps you've forgotten, little man,” I cooed in an equally bittersweet tone to the one he gave me before. “The krakotl never had a problem with settling issues the old-fashioned way before the interview. Try me and find out why I'm in the line of work I am.”
“Oh, we wouldn't want that in such a"- he waved his paw to a group of passersby who had stopped to gawk at my display -”public forum. Please, contain yourself.”
I had to force the feathers on my back to settle and I raised my head away from him. “What else is it you wanted, then?”
“Well, I'd appreciate if you took this merchandise off my paws,” he told me as he brushed the electronics and printout toward me.
“Why would I do that?”
“Because you're closer to the humans than I'd ever care to be, and may be able to find out who this Choctaw Nexus is. Something about the package just feels… off. And I know when to trust my feelings. Besides, we both know that you know where Tac is, don't we?”
“I don't-”
“We have videographic evidence that you conspired with a human - of the aforementioned squatters, no less - and let the kid escape. You're not as sneaky as you think, and if we find this ‘Choctaw Nexus’ turns out to be a bad actor that can be traced back to them - and by extension, you - well, there’d be no talking down my boss from having you dealt with. By helping me find out who this is, you may yet be able to clear your name of any wrongdoing.”
I clenched my beak tightly to maintain a straight face. Qitel stood up with a flourish and discarded the bag he was carrying in a bin.
“See, the krakotl were never special for using threats and bullying to get results. It's because you were good at killing predators,” he jeered. “Now, if you don't mind, this primitive has appointments to attend to… old lady who got trampled courtesy of the humans and all. You stay out of trouble, Hileen, and stay in touch.”
The self-assured marsupial melded into the crowd in a matter of seconds, leaving me with a table containing dumpster trophies and a pile of shells. Reluctantly, I swept the shells into my wing and dumped them into the bin before gathering the other two items he'd left me and stuffing them into my bag. I'd been gone from Nampi long enough and she would notice my absence before long.
Crossing the walkway again, I could spot from where I stood that Nampi was indeed still in the Platinum Paw. I approached, and soon I found that while she didn't seem to have noticed me stepping away, she was definitely in a soured mood based on the sagging of her ears and tail. With my talons clacking on the floorboards, I hustled to her side and her mood chippered up ever so slightly as she heard me approach.
I chimed in, “Find anything?”
“Everything. I want everything, Red, and I can't decide on what I want. They all just look so great!”
From behind, a voice called out, “Nampi!”
We both jumped at the exclamation and turned about to spot the venlil lady I'd seen before spring from behind the shelf. The man poked his head from behind the shelf too, though less enthusiastically and with yet another bag in his clutches. My friend's eyes widened in surprise with her tail and ears perking up in kind. With a light in her eyes, she exclaimed, “Nalek!”
The two embraced with shrill squeals and laughter as Nalek's accompaniment and I traded awkward glances.
“It's been too long!”
“You never stayed in contact!”
The women exchanged giddy greetings and the pompous stranger turned to me, leering over me as though she was sizing me up.
“Who's your friend here?”
“Oh she's actually my-...”
Nampi paused for a moment, looking back to me.
“Yeah, she's a friend.”
“A friend,” Nalek repeated while her eyes flicked between Nampi and I. “Right.”
Somehow, I get the impression that that was judgemental.
“I'm Hileen, by the way,” I chirped, “if names are to be exchanged.”
“Hileen, that's a lovely name! And such plumage to match, it's a wonder you aren't swarmed by suitors!”
Internally, I groaned at the notion. The idea of being approached by someone to state their interest in me made me queasy, to say the least. Thankfully, I never had that issue growing up as most of the other drakes in school were too busy chasing girls who didn't have a lousy pigmentation mutation such as myself.
“I'm flattered,” I told Nalek before turning to the man whose name had yet to be introduced. “May we get your name?”
“Sask.”
His response was succinct and tonally flat, though there was a brief silence as I expected him to elaborate. Nalek's beads jingled as she lashed him on the calf with her tail.
“I'm Sask, Nalek's fiancée,” he added, throwing her a look to see if she was satisfied.
Nampi gasped with her paws over her snout. “Fiancée! Nalek, you're getting married and you never even told me!”
“Well, I felt a little guilty since it technically broke our pact we made when we were pups. You remember that?”
“Of course! Why wouldn’t I? ‘Let she who bonds through betrothal first be cast out unto the world for all to admonish her!’”
Sask and I both gave inquisitive expressions. “You two spoke like that as pups?” Sask asked.
“Well, I'm paraphrasing,” Nampi admitted with a playful ear waggle. “But you get the gist.”
“Indeed, they do, sweet Nampi. Now, may I ask what you're doing bringing your avian friend here into this store on this fine claw?”
“Oh, no no, she's the one treating me! Isn't that right, Red?”
I saw her tail twitch and was sure it took restraint not to tickle my neck with it as we stood before her old friend.
“She's been a good friend,” I explained. “So I wanted to reverse the roles for once and treat her to something myself.”
Nampi skipped over to me and wrapped her arm around me, glancing back to her old friend. “See? We'd all be so lucky to have a… friend like her.”
“So I've witnessed. But perhaps you're a bit stuck, as I've seen you prancing up and down these aisles for a while, no? Maybe you don't know what you want?”
“Nalek, you know I've never been good about making my mind up.”
“Some things never change, you ditz. Tell you what: you and Sask go find us a seat and we can catch up all we'd like when we're not taking up aisle space, yes? So shoo! I'll help Hileen here pick one out for you!”
With a bored grunt, Sask made off with the goods he had strapped to himself, followed by Nampi who gave me one more playful tail flick before dashing off into the crowd. I looked back to the mottled snout of Nalek who watched her friend wander off with a wistful glance.
“She was my first, you know.”
“Your what now.”
“Love. Way back when we were growing from pups into young adults back in private education, we explored much together. We saw each other through a lot, including the less savory parts of finding a mate. When Nampi realized it wasn't the boys she was into, she turned to me, and I offered my hand as her stalwart companion… to a point.”
“You weren't interested in her the same way?”
“I'd grown up seeing her as a sister of sorts, so ultimately, when we split it off, we stayed close as friends and she never seemed to be bothered by it. She struggled to find others in school who had the same interests as herself, but she never fussed about it.”
Nalek's claws browsed over a set of pouched bandoliers made with intricate embroidering. “Have you two… spent the night together? Alone?”
Spiritually, I reeled from the inquiry. The whiplash from that question was equitable to being smacked by a human. “Wha- why? How's that pertinent to the subject at hand?”
“That sounds like a ‘yes’ to me,” she purred with a smug glance my way.
I didn't need to begin to list the different ways such a question was violating to our privacy, and yet this woman was treating it like a game.
“Not really your concern, ma'am.”
Nalek chuckled as she picked out one of the bandoliers and inspected it with her claws. “I'd like to think that she and I still have that old connection, despite everything. And to that end, I know that she's no slag and doesn't trust easy. To see her be so vulnerable around you and to talk so highly of someone who's clearly below her income level as a predator…”
She stretched the bandolier out to appreciate the design in its entirety.
“Well, that's something special. Here"- she foisted the accessory into my wings as I stood gobsmacked -"this just screams her name.”
“This is, like, double my budget.”
“Love don't come cheap, darling. You wanna see good things happen, sometimes you've gotta step out of your comfort zone and grasp for it!”
“I'm being lectured by a rich woman on finances.”
“It's a philosophy that goes beyond money, ‘Red.’ The humans have a saying, in their horrendously predatory nomenclature, that contains a kernel of truth: ‘you miss every shot you don't take’.”
Yep, that's definitely a human phrase.
Nalek's steely braid rattled with every flick of the tail as we proceeded through the checkout.
“You want things to change between you and her?” she continued. “Don't just wait for it to happen.”
She let the conversation rest there as we finished the purchase, possibly to let me recuperate mentally from the damage done to my account. Outside, we found our respective partners sitting at a table with Sask looking up in boredom as Nampi chatted away, though she immediately shut up and turned to me with excited flicks of her tail as she saw what I was carrying.
I held it toward her and she happily shot to her feet, effortlessly removing the tags with her claws and clipping it to her belt. Nalek clapped and waggled her tail as the giddy lady did a whirl about to let us admire the accessory. While I'd have preferred one with pockets to give it a more practical use, I decided to let Nalek have the victory as our mutual friend clearly enjoyed it.
The rest of the paw was a blur as the two friends chatted without end until Sask eventually reminded his betrothed that they had a schedule to attend to. Though Nalek offered to call us a taxi home as a gesture of kindness, I saw through her ruse to determine that she was trying to pull a fast one on me - the clever ear flick she gave as we boarded the automated vehicle sold it for me.
We sat in the seats as the vehicle took the express ride home.
Nampi cleared her throat before she spoke, “Thank you for taking some time to spend with me, I know you've had a lot less free time as of late.”
“It's a prison of my own design, if I must be honest. A feedback loop of working a job that doesn't guarantee a paycheck to pay for rent that keeps going up, and thus needing to work more.”
The venlil giggled and chided me, “You really should've stayed in university.”
“There's a lotta 'should haves’ that've led me to this point. No use wondering what could have been.”
“There's always a use for wondering what could have been, Hileen.”
She wrapped an arm around my shoulder.
“Every decision I make, I always wonder what I could've done differently that it'd have turned out better,” she explained as she waved her free paw to the sky. “It's how you grow as a person, Red.”
Her silky pelt felt heavenly in contrast to the chilly air from outside, making it hard to let her words sink in.
“You rich types seem chock full of philosophy. I wonder if I'll become a brooding orator when I get some cash to my name.”
The cab filled with laughter as we veered around the final corner to my neighborhood, as it was the closest stop. The door popped open accompanied by a chime from the drone, signaling for me to depart.
But before my talons could even hit the pavement, I felt Nampi's scrawny arms wrap around my waist and she let out a pitiful mewl again.
“You don't need to get off here,” she told me with a pouty expression. “We can spend the rest of the paw at my place.”
“I'd love it, but I need to water my plants and get the month's bills sorted before they're due. Again.”
One claw at a time, I plucked her paws from around my waist and the childish venlil conceded, giving me another ear waggle as I departed. “I'll see you tomorrow?” I asked her.
“If you still have eyes by then, then you can bet your ass!”
“I still don't gamble.”
“You'll come around to it eventually.”
I shut the door to the taxi and watched as it carted away the one venlil who I ever truly felt on the same wavelength as. Fiddling with the lock felt like more of a chore than usual at this time as I felt a little voice tugging at the back of my head.
“You miss every shot you don't take.”
The lock felt jammed as I began to jiggle it more vigorously with the electric key. Either the RFID or NFC readers were messed up, as the lock refused to accept my key. I looked up and down the street, though Nampi was now long gone for me to rescind my earlier rejection.
“Every decision I make, I wonder what I could've done differently.”
The door rattled as I grew more and more infuriated with the lock. Qitel's smug expression as he threatened me so boldly in public played back in my head, and I wondered what would've happened had I decided to go through with insulting his mother. Better yet, I wondered what could've been had I not backed down in the face of his unflinching confidence.
Bzzt. The lock rejected my key again.
“Raagh! You fucking useless hunk of junk!”
I squawked in anger and kicked against the door, careless of the consequences of having Markol back down here to admonish another of his tenants for causing a ruckus. The walls were surprisingly sturdy for how ineffective the venlil architecture looked on the surface and I reeled back in pain as my leg throbbed.
Click.
I looked to my left to see that it wasn't my door that came open, but that of the twins. The door cracked open ever so slightly, no doubt nudged by the force of my tirade and I sighed. Nobody was expected to be home at this time, with Vili being away and Luka leaving early to get a head start.
Luka had been given a stern talking-to by the landlord for allowing one of those cats into his apartment through neglect, and I was disappointed that he seemed to have not learned his lesson this time. In fact, it seemed he hadn't even thought to lock the door this time.
I took it upon myself to shut the door for him before turning back to my own apartment door. Grasping the key with one talon, I turned it ever so gently, though the lock still refused to give in.
With a bit more force, the torsion applied to the key felt as though it should've snapped it by now. Markol sure didn't waste any expense for the security for this place, doubtlessly as a result of his history in electronic security, but I wished now that he had provided a way in that didn't rely on privately sourced locks.
Considering my options as I stood trapped outside, I realized that I had never gotten around to paying for a new lock for Tadi. I'd considered contacting her to inform her that Tac had made it out of town safely, but that'd involve also telling her that her son was now in the care of humans, as if that was a better outcome to her.
Stepping out front, I realized that there was one more option I hadn't considered: my window. I usually forgot to lock it after I was through letting air circulate and I was silently grateful to myself for this absentmindedness now more than ever. Sticking a foot on the threshold, I lifted myself in a way that'd allow me to have leverage to force the window open.
The window made me fight for every inch, but I felt a strange satisfaction as it slowly opened up into an entrance that I could squeeze my way through. I let out a sigh as my talons clicked against the cool floor and slid the window shut.
I laid my satchel on the couch and turned back to the door, ready to unleash my fury on the disobedient object. But as I reached for the lock to manually open the door, I noted that the lights on the RFID interface both flashed at once, blinking erratically. Red and green flickered without rhyme or reason, indicating that it was both active and inactive.
As pretty as the colors were, I now knew that Markol's locks were not as reliable as he had touted them about: typically, such would not occur unless the device was damaged deliberately, and yet nothing indicated that I'd had uninvited guests. One could pray that those cats didn't secretly know how to cobble together an ECM jammer, but my personal wager was on faulty equipment.
Settling in, I browsed my favorite soaps on the television. For what was intended to be a day of relaxation and show of affection for a friend, I found myself rather wound up over all the things that added up. Couples threw around flowery words and swooned over one another on screen as I felt the tension diffuse. My holopad rang and I turned it over to spot that Nampi was informing me that she'd arrived home safely.
>>> Feels empty here, all alone.
She made sure to drive the point home with a sticker of a venlil making a pouty expression.
Next time, I thought to myself, I'll get it right for you, Nampi.
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I 29f am seeing a guy 35m who lives with his ex... I just found this out on date #2.
I like him a lot, personality wise he's everything im looking for and seems amazing so makes sense he was in an 8 yr relationship before this. Hes so easy to talk to. He has been "single" a year but going through a legal battle about the sale of him & his exes home. He can't really afford both his mortgage and rent despite having a good career (NYC), so I that's why he's waiting til it gets resolved to buy a place of his own. He says he stays at his parents a fair bit when he's not at work and does his best not to see his ex, but they obviously must still communicate to a degree and see one another. Apparently they both grew apart over the years but it wasnt toxic.
I am having a hard time wrapping my mind around it but don't want to say bye to someone I finally click with (been out with so many guys over the past few years and didnt like anyone as much as him). I live at home rn until the end of summer (I was in grad school til now), so I wouldnt take it anywhere sexual w him til I get my own place. But I don't really know how i'd feel if we did take it there and then he goes home and stays in the same home as his ex. It sounds like the legal stuff, buying a new place and entire resolution could take a year.
Would it be insane to continue dating this guy? Ive never had a really serious relationship so this is so foreign and unexpected to me. I do have friends who broke up with guys they owned with, but they simply came to an agreement & cut ties even if it financially sucked. If I was in his circumstance Idk if i'd date. He noted other girls he went out with were too put off by this to continue which he understood. Im open minded and we set up a 3rd date since we click so well, but now im feeling really anxious about it as I want something serious and don't bring baggage like this at ALL. Then again i'm not sure im gonna be able to find the right person for me. Its so rare that I click w someone. WWYD?

Lately the whole typology community has been obsessed with narrowing down possible combinations between types of different typology systems. This tendency, without any exaggerations, has reached a point of absurdity. Unfortunately the majority of community supports the idea of strict archetypes, neglecting the fact that human psyche is not a material thing that can fit into certain categories. Our consciousness surely can be characterised by some definitions or dichotomies, nonetheless all typology systems were inherently created to describe mental processes, not to force people fit into specific categorisations. All sciences change their theories if they don’t correspond to reality - for some reason this rule is not applied in typology. The community decided that we have to adjust people’s identities to fit into some rules that are not always correct.
Of course, some combinations are obviously not possible, but that absolutely doesn’t mean that we have to get rid of almost every correlations. Borders between various typology systems are not precise since each of them focuses on its own peculiar studies of human personality. This is the reason why sometimes it’s just impossible to amalgamate some typology methods to create a correlation between them.
In this article i want to talk about IEI so4 archetype and its combinations with types of attitudinal psyche method of typology.
First of all let’s emphasise that 4th enneagram type belongs to heart triad. This means that individuals who identify themselves with this enneatype can only be ethical types in socionics. Considering the fact that 4th enneagram type is also known as a withdrawn one, individuals who associate themselves with this enneatype are most likely to be introverts.
Now let’s dive deeper into details of social subtype. I want to quote a description from this website: “The social instinct motivates us to create relationships and care for the wellbeing of others. It includes our desire to positively enhance the lives of those we care for. When sensitive to the social instinct, we’re interested and curious about people beyond what they can be or do for us. The social drive is what helps us to assess who is and who isn’t a worthy friend, ally or partner, without losing sight of the humanity of anyone we may be in conflict with.”
Description of So-IV subtype by Claudio Naranjo: “Social Fours develop mechanisms for calling negative attention to themselves. The shyest of the Four subtypes. There's a shame about desiring, about "loving." Proust is filled with the social envy of the person dazzled by the "aristocracy," who has a passion for being "in", who wants to be included, to receive their favors. A feeling of "I'm nothing," "I'm ugly," "I'm silly." Fours in general want to absorb through their gaze, but this is especially true for the Social Four”
I think both of aforementioned citations are without any doubt correlated to the Fe-function in ego-block position: “Fe is generally associated with the ability to recognize and convey (i.e. make others experience) passions, moods, and emotional states, … , recognize and describe emotional interaction between people and groups, and build a sense of emotional unity.” - desertion is taken from this website:
We can conclude that So-4 enneagram subtype strives to share own emotions with others, in other words to evoke certain impressions in the public. It means that such individuals are focused on their emotional impact on others. This statement also corresponds to the description of the emotional aspect in the 2nd position, which is conscious, extroverted and subjective: “Second Emotions provoke the expression of reactions, showdown. They encourage acting in other people.” - https://wiki.personality-database.com/books/psychosophy-attitudinal-psyche/page/emotion
Now let’s discuss why IEI So-4 individuals may have the volitional aspect in the 4th position. Description of 4V: “The Fourth Will becomes weak-willed, waiting for decisions and active actions from others... Such individual can take the lead, but only if he is “assigned” by those around him, but hardly of his own free will, because he does not like to strain and bear responsibility too much. There is an opinion that the Fourth Wills have no ambitions - this is not so. But it is easier for them to realize their ambitions alone, without responsibility “for a common cause”. In addition, 4V can be “infected” with your dreams and plans with prolonged exposure”.
Aforesaid statement is almost identical to the definition of suggestive Se:
“He is additionally very indecisive. He may lack the ability to make important decisions, especially with regards to his own future. He may know what he wants to achieve out of life in a broad or long term sense, but will find it very difficult to set and finish the short term projects leading to it. In order to be able to act, he needs a tangible and definite stimulus from somebody well grounded in external reality and who has a clear picture of what must be done in a certain situation.”
All these arguments indicate that IEI So-4 archetype can be not only an ExVx in attitudinal psyche typology system, but also an xExV.
Thanks for your attention !!!!

Wanted to share my experience doing crash course studying for 7 days and passing the SIE first attempt! I never post anything on here, but others posts made a big difference for me, so here goes!
TL;DR:
I passed my SIE yesterday after only 7 days of study. Intense! I used Pass Perfect, spent 50 hours studying total. If you only have a week or two before your test, DO NOT take a bunch of notes on everything! Read the content, take the quizzes and test, take notes on those answers and explanations!
VERY IMPORTANT: Use the two free Achievable SIE dump Sheets and watch both the S7g.u.r.u and S7 Whisperer 60 min crash course SIE YouTube videos the day before or day of test! I’ve included links at the bottom of this post. Be sure to memorize the dump sheet tricks and formulas, and decide what’s most important to reference. The test center gives you two laminated sheets and dry erase markers you can use as soon as the test timer starts. Be ready to write down key formulas, acronyms, timeframes, etc. Mine were the Options 4 square box, SLoBS & BLiSS, yield teeter totter and Key Open vs Closed end market notes. (All on the achievable dump sheets except Open/Closed Markets).
My Story:
In late April I was hired by Vanguard for a position starting May 28. I’d been a contractor doing customer service in an unlicensed VG position for about 10 months (no finance background before that); with the goal of getting hired in a licensed, permanent role within a year. I worked hard and got hired! The position requires SIE, S7 and S63. After my start date they pay me to do nothing but study and take exams for 9 or 13 weeks (depending on whether I’d passed the SIE prior to start date), which is awesome, but there’s a $5000 bonus if the SIE is passed at least a week before start date.
Note: I did have a little familiarity with basic terms and what’s required for account opening, due to my contractor position).
I originally scheduled my exam for May 13. I had about a month from hire date to May 13, and VG paid for the Pass Perfect course. I started some light studying the first week, thinking I had 3 more weeks and was on track. Then I got really sick for 2 weeks! I’m talking bed ridden, definitely no studying. So May 10 I rescheduled my exam to May 18! I had to pay $40 but figured it was well worth it not to fail, lol.
I was finally well enough to start studying on May 11, giving me 7 days. 😅 I had retained very little from my initial studying so I started over. I thought “I can do this!” I figured I’d had to do similar in college while working full time. Boy it was rough!
7 Days to PASS the SIE:
The first 3 days I had all day to study: Sat, Sun and Mon (had the day off for my original test date).
THE PLAN 41+ hours 5 practice tests, scoring at least 75%
Days 1-3 (full days) - 8+ hrs per day - Complete Pass Perfect Course (16 chapters) start to finish (reading and all quizzes, chapter tests)
Days 4-5 (Tues, Wed) - 5 hrs each day (2 before work and 3 after) - Take 1-2 Pass Perfect Final exams (1 hr 45 min each) each day, taking time to focus/take notes on anything I missed - Goal of 4 total tests, with 75% or higher on 3
Day 6 (Friday, day before the test) - 5 hours (2 hrs before work, 3 hours after) - Take 1 FINRA practice SIE exam before work (free on FINRA website) - after work, Review all Difficult Topics - Listen to S7g.u.r.u & S7 whisperer on YouTube. (They each have a 60 minute crash course review, recommended for day before or day of test). - Print out Achievable Dump Sheets - add my own notes to dump sheets
Day 7 (Day of Test) Test scheduled for 2pm (1:30 registration) - 2 hours Notes and Dump Sheets Review in morning - Leave for Test at 11:30, arrive 12:30 (45 min drive) - One last Review of Dump Sheets for 45 min, take a break before registration
Great Plan Right?! Wellll, I didn’t quite stick to it. 🤣
What Actually Happened: 52 Hours 4 Practice Finals (71% average)
Day 1 (Sat): 7 hrs Completed first 3 chapters, taking tons of notes on a Google doc, color coded and highlighted. I’ll do more tomorrow I thought, my brain is fried
Day 2 (Sun): 10 hours Completed chapters 4&5 again taking tons (too many) notes, taking quizzes and Tests multiple times, worried I wasn’t getting the concepts and terms well enough. Getting really worried about my pace now, but “hey I have tomorrow. I’ll crush it and catch up”. Maybe I won’t get to tests until Thurs.
Day 3 (Mon): 7 hrs (I was exhausted and burnt out, still not 100% from being sick) Chapter 6 OPTIONS… the death of me, soooo much to learn. Barely got through chapter 6. Full panic has now set in! I have to work full time the next 4 days!
Day 4 (Tues): 6 hrs ( 6pm-12am) Intense panic and anxiety, how the hell am I going to finish?! Screw notes, get through the chapters! Completed chapters 7-10 Whew, these chapters weren’t as bad, I think I remember a good amount. Better wrap this up tomorrow!
Day 5 (Wed): 5 hrs Very worried, but I’ll finish today and take lots of tests the next 2 days! Completed chapters 11-13 😫 OMG I’m still not done with the course and I have 2 days left!
Day 6 (Thurs): 6 hrs in the evening - Completed remaining chapters 14-16, course done 8pm. Whew, content done. Worried about not taking any tests yet, but at least I feel like I know the content decently! Took my first Pass Perfect Test, score 71% not as bad as I thought but that’s not a lot of margin for error! (Need 70% to Pass actual SIE test). At that point I’m calculating how much each point is worth, looking up suggestions online and praying, lol
Day 7 (Fri): 7 hrs Took 2 Pass Perfect tests, reviewing missed answers carefully and taking notes. Scores: 71% and 73%. Took FINRA SIE test (on their website), 69%. Omg I’m gonna fail tomorrow.
Friday night I thought “Hmm Maybe I can reschedule for Monday (the deadline to pass for bonus). Two more days and I get get this!” So I go to the Prometrics website and try to reschedule, seeing one slot for Monday at a site 2 hrs away… awesome.. NOPE, NOT AlLOWED less than 3 days before scheduled exam! So I called customer service, begged and told them I had been sick, since they said I could not reschedule the day before the test, I asked if they could cancel it and schedule a new appt for Monday? DENIED. So I take a deep breath and come to terms with it. This test is happening tomorrow. 😫
Friday night 9pm: As recommended by colleagues and online forums, I listen to S7 whisperer 60 min crash course on YouTube; no notes, listening in bed). Ok, learned some things, great overview/review. Maybe I can pull this off afterall..
Saturday, May 13… Day of Test (2-4pm)
7am woke up, ate a good breakfast, prepared everything I needed to take and do. Now what? Should I take another practice test? Review my notes? Listen to video? I decided no more tests, I’ll listen to the other crash course (S7g.u.r.u 60 min crash course on YouTube).
8am—11:30 Crunch time. Im determined to pass this exam!! Spent 3 hours listening to the 60 min S7g.u.r.u video, pausing when needed, replaying as needed. Took 11 pages of color coded notes on the most important points and formulas I needed to remember, mainly on Regulations (what market does it impact, what type of product, who, timeframes). I knew this was going to be at least 15% of test (I was right) and these were the main questions I missed on my Practice Finals
11:30am Renewed Faith 🙌 DAMN I learned a LOT. I’m gonna pass this thing! I was already getting low 70s on Thursday practice tests and I KNOW I learned enough from the video to pass several more questions. S7g.u.r.u literally saved me, pulling it all together in my mind!
12pm Went to UPS store, printed the 2 Achievable dump sheets and my 11 pages of notes from the video! I scanned them at every red light on the way 😂
12:59 arrived at test center. Spent 20 minutes reviewing dump sheets and drilling in my mind what to put on the 2 pages they give me for notes (specifically below and in links)
1:20 walk in, first one there.. registration complete at 1:35. To my surprise, they seat me and I can start test immediately!
As soon as the timer started my hands were flying on the 2 laminated sheets they gave me. I spent the first 15 min vigorously writing out things I wanted to reference. 90 minutes left for 85 questions. Watched the timer closely to stay on pace. Used the notepad on the test platform for each question to write out calculations, or break down what each part of the question meant, used critical thinking for answer, marking questions for review when I was stuck between 2 answers. Most importantly, I followed my gut. I knew this stuff! Used calculator for EVERY calculation, even easy ones. Finished all questions with 5 minutes remaining. Reviewed marked questions and changed only 3, if I was SURE my original answer was wrong.
I hit Sum it and hold my breath. OMG, does that say PASS?!!! Yes, I actually Passed! I cried out of happiness and relief, was on cloud 9. I will never cram like this again! S7 and S63 will be better, lol.
SO here’s how you can have a better experience than me if you’re a week or two away and wondering how you can possibly pull this off. YOU CAN DO IT!
TIPS FOR CRASH SIE STUDYING (learn from my mistakes)
1 NOTE TAKING: I’ve always learned best by taking a ton of notes, color coded on a google doc. Taking notes reinforces it in my brain and helps me find ways to remember it for myself. However, if you are crash course Studying for the SIE, you do NOT have time to do this, lol. Honestly I barely looked at those notes in the end.
TIP: Read through the content quickly and only take notes when it tells you it’s likely a testable question! Take all quizzes and tests, REVIEW the quiz/test answers (in PP the answers also give you a brief explanation of the concept) and take light notes on that! Do NOT replace reading with the videos! The first 4 chapters I tried to save time doing this and wondered why I was failing the chapter tests. The reading content had way more info than the video! Don’t shoot yourself in the foot!
2 DON’T SPEND TOO MUCH TIME on EARLY CONCEPTS! The earlier (and for the most part, less valuable - less test questions) content will be reinforced throughout course. Most of the concepts build over the course, so the basics are reinforced later anyway. I wasted several hours!
3 EXPECT 20-25 hours are needed to complete the course/learn the concepts! Give yourself a day on REGULATIONS and 5 hours on OPTIONS , these comprised a LOT of questions on the test, could make or break you!
4 TAKE at least 4 PRACTICE FINALS with a goal of 75%, but if you’re not improving, use the crash course Videos, learn the content! Don’t take 5 more tests in lieu of learning!
5 SPEND A FEW HOURS on (free) ACHIEVABLE DUMP SHEETS and S7g.u.r.u & S7 Whisperer crash course review videos on YouTube! I would not have passed without these! Reviewing them for 4 hours and using them for key points on my tests sheets saved my ass!
I’ve included links below for the FREE Achievable Dump Sheets and the 60 minute crash course videos. Feel free to message me for more help!
GOOD LUCK! It IS Possible to pass in a week!
SIE DUMP SHEETS: (scroll to bottom of the page):
https://achievable.me/exams/finra-sie/overview/#resources
S7g.u.r.u 60 min crash course
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_hQRLmVspNE
S7 Whisperer 60 min crash course
https://youtu.be/_-x-RFmFAD0?si=i_ZDrrFIWuMOTK6A

I (30f) got married last year and my younger sister (25f) has been continuously telling everyone that is willing to listen that I'm a Bridezilla. I stand firm in my decisions and if I had to do it over I'd do it again. I was engaged for 10 years before getting married because we felt that we were too young to get married we were just getting to know ourselves much less each other but we were committed each other so we were happy with just being engaged. A little background on my sister Kate, we don't share the same father she isn't the youngest for my mother (I have another sister that follows her) but she acts like it. Ever since we were young she wanted everything I had to the point that whatever my father was taking to to give my mother for me he would just buy two so she wouldn't fight for mine (didnt work) mind you whatever her father brought for her was for her and her alone. I never gave into her tantrums even when I was a child I shared when I wanted to and ignored her when I didn't want to. I left home when I was 17 and went to live with my father bcuz her behavior never changed and I didn't want to live like that anymore. To some my life would be considered boring because I am introverted so my day to day life consists of me just going to and from work, other than the odd birthday vacation each year,I rarely go out. I do however buy nice things for myself bcuz I work hard for it and I deserve it. She complained to my mother once that I was showing off because I'm always buying my daughter (8) expensive things which I don't. As a way to teach my child the value of money she does her chores and earns her allowance which she has to save and at the end of the term she chooses what she wants to buy and if her savings isn't enough I will put the difference however because of the complaint that she made to my mother my daughter no longer wants to hang out with her cousins and I will not force her. Now to the story. Two years ago my fiance Rich and I decided to start planning our wedding but we were having issues because I'd rather elope and move on but he's so extroverted we were clashing on every decision from total guest to the wedding colours. After weeks deliberating and petty pranks (on both sides) we finally came to an agreement on the wedding colours so we decided to inform the family. My mother has a family dinner on my birthday and that's where I decided to make the announcement. My sister and her fiance were present and she jumped at the chance to beg for a double wedding and I immediately shot that down with an abrupt "No" and continued to eat my dinner. She started whining and complaining but my answer was no and I told her I had no reason to explain myself to her. When she realized that she wasn't getting anywhere with me she turns to my mother and starts complaining to which my mother told that it's my money and my wedding and I'm free to do whatever I wanted and her tantrum only got worse. In an effort to not ruin my birthday dinner my fiance explained to her that she and I had different personalities and liked different things and our friend circles were too different to even consider mixing them together but he was fighting a losing battle bcuz he wasn't equipped to handle that level of crazy. I turned to her and ask who would pay for her half of the wedding and who would buy her dresses as she is unemployed and her fiance at the time was just a trainee, she turned to me and asked me why would she have to pay for half of the wedding and at that statement I went back to eating. My fiance finally understood why my mother and I didn't even bother to explain anything further to her, he looked at her fiance and told him "I'm only getting married once so I going to do it right" and ended the conversation, she flipped out and left and her fiance had to gather her kids and ran behind her. I moved on with my wedding plans and everything was going along smoothly because money wasn't really an issue. I have a lot of family from both parents and both step parents so in order to pick bridesmaids I literally made a little lottery and picked their names out bag and I made a whole deal out of it by taking a video and sending it the various WhatsApp groups. I picked one sister (my big sister Kim) one cousin, one friend and one step sibling and we all lived happily ever after until the first rehearsal for my wedding. After the rehearsal we went to Pizza Hut and I posted a pic on my WhatsApp status of us all eating and goofing about and she messages me and ask how I'm hanging out with family and leaving her out to which I said were just hanging out after the wedding rehearsal so it's just the wedding party, she demanded to know why she wasn't chosen so I just sent her the video of my "lottery" bcuz it was so much easier than explaining it to her, she said nothing and i thought that was the end of it, I shouldve known better. When Kim went home she told my mother everything that happened at the rehearsal and how I was considering making it a child free wedding because of the chaos that happened at the rehearsal with all the kids of the bridesmaids and the groomsmen, I was traumatized lol. Kate asked her if my daughter would be there to which Kim replied and said yes she's the flower girl and the conversation ended there. That day Kate sent me a 14 minute voicenote which I ignored bcuz I've said it repeatedly if you cant say it in a minute just call me I'm not listening to that and I refuse to compromise on my boundaries especially with her. Because i didn't listen to the voicenote I didn't hear all the disgusting things she called me and my child that and Rich so I went about happily until the day the invites were sent out. My wedding colours were silver, rose gold and black however the only dress code stipulation I had was NO WHITE bcuz I wanted the only one to be in white. I had a busy day at work so I didn't look at my phone much but with the few glance I took I saw that the family group was buzzing so I made sure to check it as soon as work ended and I was shocked af. My sister was telling our entire extended family that not only did I not invite her to my wedding I was lashing out at having her son as my ring bearer and that the comment I had made about the white dress was directly aimed at her because I was telling people that she was trying to ruin my wedding and the evidence that she was using was that she wasn't made a bridesmaid, Thankfully I had persons defending me. I went into her inbox to ask her to cuss her out tbh and saw the 14 min vn and decided to listen and I was dead ass fuming after the first 30 seconds so I just forwarded the vn to the family chat and I sent a screenshot of the conversation that she and I had before the vn and I let them have all the evidence. I then publicly uninvited her to the wedding and I made sure to note that it was only her that was uninvited not her sons or her fiance their invites were still valid and they were more than welcomed there. I took a screenshot of that post and every time she posted on her status or her Facebook about how evil I was I would repost it and I did that right up until the day of my wedding. I am now happily married and have moved on with my life but since the wedding she's been using the excuse of me refusing to allow her to have a double wedding with me as her reasoning for her behavior and that I was Bridezilla bcuz of that. I don't feel like I should be obligated to do anything for anyone in the name of "family"especially if said family member is an overgrown toddler. I changed the names but this is my real so she might see it but I'm fine with it as I stand by every decision I made

i’m a diehard hip hop fan, more specifically Kendrick, so most of this stuff I know by heart so why not make a post pointing out EVERY SINGLE wrong thing i can catch Pyro say. Im mostly making this since it pisses me off when people who have zero clue about something come in and try to sound confident as hell about it while getting countless things wrong. I will try to link proper sources for everything he got wrong as well. Enjoy! By the way when I say Dot it is Kendrick I’m talking about. And I will also put the time stamps of what i’m talking about
Also if i got something wrong please correct me so I can edit it. Most everything here should be correct however
First off and it isn’t Pyro, it’s Critikal, but talking about how youtubers in 2016 ruined diss tracks and Dot vs Drake is the first beef since then to make real diss tracks is so funny because Pusha T vs Drake happened in 2018 I believe so just goes to show how in touch they are
Okay once again something petty , it’s small but it kinda shows how much research was done from the get go, because Kendrick’s real name isn’t Kendrick Lamar, It is Kendrick Duckworth, Lamar is just his middle name. So it kinda shows the research level when you can’t get the dudes name right when you’re supposed to be saying the full name of both dudes.
4:50
Claim - Drake came from nothing thus Drake flexes money
Okay so this is the first major one I think. Drake did not come from nothing, he grew up in rich neighborhoods, more specifically Forest Hill in Toronto. Not to mention his father’s side of the family had many successful musicians. He grew up rich. This is why people dislike Drake as he tends to go on his records rapping about the hard hoods and shit like this when he grew up infinitely more wealthy than most other rappers.
5:05
Claim - Kendrick does not like Drake as he flexes too much
Not even close. The actual origin of their beef is said to come from Kendrick’s legendary verse on Control. It is said that after Kendrick made his verse Drake felt very disrespected and thus attempted to blacklist kendrick from various radio stations which didn’t work. Kendrick felt that Drake took the verse too personally when Kendrick was just being competitive(it is vital to note that every other artist Kendrick mentioned ignore it or praised him for it). And eventually the animosity just kept ramping up as many people began to perceive drake as a culture vulture due to the fact he’d rap about stuff such as hard life in the streets or gangs despite never growing up around that only because it was trendy at that time. Which funnily enough is what pyro is doing right now, he’s culture vulturing off the beef since it’ll give him money but doesn’t really care
6:00-8:00
I don’t see why bring up Pusha T vs Drake as this isn’t that relevant to the Dot beef. Not to mention he just skips over 90% of things said in the beef. But yea it’s not Adoeniss lmao.
8:15
Okay so that wasn’t a diss track. That’s a sneak diss, something very big to distinguish as in the hip hop community sneak disses are seen as a pussies way to start beef while trying not to. this is especially relevant to drake as one of the biggest criticism of drake is how often he sneak disses rappers. to the point dot himself mentioned it in one of the diss tracks. Also tory le ness. also again i don’t see why bring this up as it is not relevant to the Dot beef. It wasn’t even a beef in the first place megan never fired back nor did drake even say her name. just feels like padding runtime
9:15- 9:30
Why is bigfoot being brought up at all it is not relevant, i’ve said it like three time but it really isn’t you can skip over all this and not have missed a single thing
10:05
Claim - Megan’s law line is about drake
It isn’t, this is the line that kickstarted the nicki beef. Nicki’s husband and i think brother are both sex offenders, Megan’s line about Megan’s law references a law in america where it is required for the police to make a sex offenders information public. Maybe it can be about drake but it almost unanimously agreed it’s about nicki. Okay so i listened to everything he said, basically the same I said. So yea it’s probably not about drake only reason people think it is is because kendrick called him a predator
14:03
Metros booming track? For all the scary dogs? what? Everything else he said seems accurate however. He didn’t mention the prince and jackson line though which was specifically at drake
16:30
No, GKMC was the classic he was talking about. The actual line would be the classic is GKMC, the overhyped is TPAB and the prime was DAMN. This is the only one that makes sense as not many people see section 80 as a classic whereas GKMC is seen as the first of the four run classics by Kendrick. Also good kid and Maad City
21:14
They weren’t directly involved but essentially Drake was saying that all the dudes I collab with clear you because of me. And that you’re not even the biggest in your own label, cus I think him and SZA were both top dawg. Pyro also doesn’t mention the push up and give me 50 line despite being the fucking chorus
21:48
That’s not it? At all? What Rick ross was trying to say is that Drake is so insecure about his own music that he had to “leak” the song in order to see if the public liked it enough for him to officially release it
22:20
That’s not what he claimed at all either. The nose job thing is not about not giving credit to his mentors, it’s about how Drake is seen as confused about his race and how he never felt black enough and that he isn’t black enough. Pusha and Dot tackled the same thing head on. Hell Dot literally ended Euphoria by saying Drake shouldn’t say the n word no more. It’s nothing abt giving credit rather adding on to the fake narrative that’s chased Drake his whole career
23:35
Thats part but not the only reason. He used the voice of the most iconic west side rapper ever to diss and make fun of tue current best west side rapper. This is why that became so controversial among the hip hop community, which he doesn’t mention. Because it’s corny to use the voice of a dead man to diss a dude who’s seen as the protege of Tupac and the current rep of the west coast.
25:48
It’s small but hearing Pyro act like DMX is just “some random rapper that passed away that said the same thing” is so annoying. Like bro isn’t a legendary rapper himself. It’s the equivalent of saying “oh yea and this interview of this one boxer, Mike Tyson idk if yk him, said the same shit”
26:13
No he isn’t saying that because Drake isn’t an activist he’s saying that because of the fact that Drake grew up super wealthy, but likes to act and pretend like he had a hard up bringing. The black enough just comes form the way Drake is perceived as a culture vulture who likes to pretend to live a life he didn’t.
29:33
Most people don’t care about writers. Kanye is a legendary rapper and he was well known for having writers in his track. The problem comes from when you attempt to portray yourself as an incredible writer when in reality you have 20 dudes doing it and you ignore that part. What makes it funnier is that Kendrick actually mentioned this in Euphoria I believe with the “It’s 1v20 with all the writers”. Essentially it’s the same as an athlete taking steroids but pushing himself as clean. Just makes you feel fake, which again is the main narrative around drake
31:00
Thing is that it wasn’t just his son, he literally addresses each family member, including his father. Also the predator line is referencing his father, and also Baka who’s an actual sex offender, so idk why mention that but not mention who it is he’s talking abt
Okay, so I think that’s it. Pyro weirdly left out vital parts of the beef such as how Drake was constantly alluding to Dots wife cheating with the bodyguard. Or other stuff like that. Or just not explaining certain bars and what they mean when it’s like 20 seconds at most. Or why some backlash occurred or like leaving certain things that can paint a picture of why Drake lost which is what he’s attempting to do. Such as him leaving out the fact that the Tupac part got backlash because of the west coast connection. Or how Drake isn’t critiqued for flexing but rather pretending to live a life he never did just because it’s trendy
In other words it just sounds like a white dude who’s never even listened to one song by either artist trying to make money off of it. Stick to Sunnyv2 and inflated furry porn pyro.

I lost my mum to cancer 13, almost 14 years ago now. It hasn’t gotten any easier since. I miss her so much but I hardly remember her. I lost her when I was 10, I’m 24 now and it still hasn’t really gotten any easier. It makes me so sad when I see girls with their mums, why can’t that be me! I wish it was me. She was my best friend, I wish she could’ve lived forever. Cancer is so evil. How they haven’t found a cure for it yet I don’t know. I just want to do all of the girly things that come with having a mum, getting our nails done together, gossiping, having sleepovers together, just doing everything a mother and daughter would be doing. I’m so sad I will never get to experience this. Does anyone else who’s lost their mother feel this way? It would be nice to know I’m not alone. There’s a massive hole in my chest that never seems to go away. And I don’t think it ever will. I miss her so much.

TLDR: They do, just not in the ways you might expect.
I apologize to those who were looking for an erudite, scholarly article with cited quotations from approved theosophical sources. Unfortunately, it’s only my opinion based on my studies, personal experience, and pure speculation in some instances, and without delineating which are which, so if you choose to read further, please keep that in mind. Those of us who like to study The Mahatma Letters to A.P. Sinnett, the Letters from the Masters of the Wisdom, and the letters received by Olcott in Old Diary Leaves marvel at the number of notes, messages, and sometimes long letters that were received by numerous aspiring chelas from 1873 to about 1886, filled with encouragement, wisdom, and teachings of the Ancient Wisdom doctrine. Where did these Masters go?
Those particular Mahatmas have continued to progress in their spiritual enlightenment at a pace far faster than that at which most of us are traveling. Some may not be directly associated with human spiritual development at all by now, and if they are, it is from a much greater distance, metaphorically speaking, than the distance between them and aspirants in 1880. Hume and Sinnett were told not to worry because there would always be a few replacements for the Adepts as they progressed to other assignments.
KH had to get special permission from the Mahāchohan to communicate through HPB with Sinnett, Hume, and others. It was given very reluctantly and with more restrictions as time went on. The Adepts were hoping to find one or more Europeans (including people of European descent in other countries) that could take up the work begun by HPB. They tried various potential candidates, beginning with Hume and Sinnett, and invariably they failed, one after another. In the meantime, HPB still had to furnish the specific energy she alone could supply to make communication possible between a Mahatma and those who had none of the special training she had. The two Englishmen were warned early on that if she died, her energy reserve was only enough for two or three letters, at most. As it turned out, it was only one letter that was received after she died in 1891.
It seems that training Europeans to be chelas is not as easy as training certain Asians. Per KH, “You may be, and most assuredly are, our superiors in every branch of physical knowledge; in spiritual sciences we were, are, and always will be — your Masters.” The Asian way of thinking is simply better adapted to grasping spiritual concepts. But obviously it isn't impossible for Europeans to succeed since KH also assured Hume and Sinnett that there were two English Adepts even at that time. So it is possible, just more difficult. This implies that Europeans have to work even harder to achieve the same degree of progress. Not what we wanted to hear, but still good to know.
After HPB died, communications ended abruptly. Her students were bereft. Olcott, who periodically had received direct communications, was confused. He assumed they would continue as before. Damodar, one of the few chelas who had also been able to receive direct communications, had left for Tibet about the same time Blavatsky left India forever. Olcott was convinced that Damodar would return to fill in for her, but that never happened. I realize there are theosophists who believe that communications continued after HPB’s death, but in my opinion, the quality of those messages were markedly different from the quality we find in The Mahatma Letters, so I don’t have much confidence in most of those post-Blavatsky messages.
The original experiment of training one or more European chelas to replace Blavatsky failed. All the thousands of Mahatma-hours devoted to the goal seemingly came to nought. Except that it didn’t. Even if it didn’t succeed immediately, the seeds had been planted, but it would take time for results to be realized. We have a plethora of information now on how to become a chela, but that too is a problem. How do we sift through the mountains of information available, much of it not very useful, to find those few pure nuggets of gold that will point us in the right direction? The answer is simple: discernment. Okay, maybe not that simple, since not many people seem to have developed discernment. This qualification was originally called discrimination, but I will use the term discernment since the meaning of discrimination has changed markedly in the past 100 years. How do we develop discernment?
Again, the answer is simple: Get rid of ego. Now at least we have something we can understand. The answer may be simple, but getting rid of ego is anything but simple. We have to be willing to let go of it, release our attachment to possessions, our quest for power, our love of attention, need for approval, need to be needed, need of validation, our desire for excitement and drama. That’s a lot, but it has to be done, even if it takes more than one lifetime to make it happen, but hopefully some of us started the process in previous lifetimes and are continuing to work on it currently. If anyone thought the path was going to be easy, it isn’t. If it were, it would be nothing special. Anyone with a little perseverance could gain the powers of the advanced chelas without giving up much that we cherish. The path to chelaship is not fun and exciting, certainly not for a long, long time. It is mostly pain and hardship as we give up one thing after another that we thought was so important to our happiness. The more we are attached to material things and the goals of materialism, the more arduous the ascent up the mountain of chelaship.
So far, acquiring discernment and getting rid of ego are two things we can definitely work on. What’s next? Well, purity is absolutely essential. So, becoming a vegetarian, a non-smoker, a non-drinker and not engaging in sex except within an approved form of marriage, right? Well, those will all be required at some point, and even more eventually, but they are not required in the early stages. Purity of motive is number one, then comes purity of ethics. Do we believe it’s okay to lie if it helps achieve a good result? Not according to KH. He said an untruth had never passed his lips in this lifetime and emphasized that being scrupulous in telling the truth is absolutely necessary. How can a Mahatma trust someone who is willing to lie sometimes? They can’t, and more than one aspiring chela failed because they couldn’t pass that test. Sterling ethics are essential for chelaship.
Another requirement is an unconditional love of humanity and all living things, which includes our planet. Is there anyone at all that you hate? If so, you don’t have unconditional love of humanity and don’t truly believe in Brotherhood. Without this foundational belief in Oneness, to the point that we treat everyone as a brother, regardless of their actions, then we haven’t grasped the full meaning of this concept. It’s something else we may need to work on.
Does anyone receive any communications from these Masters anymore? Yes, they do. They are the ones who have been working for more than one or two lifetimes already toward that goal. They are already ahead of most of us who are still struggling to figure out what is important and what is not. Through sheer hard work they have succeeded in developing discernment, reduction of the ego to almost nothing, non-attachment and non-reaction. Through countless hours of meditation, they have achieved oneness, to some extent, with their Higher Self, and glimmers of inspiration and insight are beginning to come through. These faint first fruits of effort eventually become a more reliable channel by which any Mahatma who may have been watching over those efforts can test the connection from time to time, by planting a thought near us to see if we recognize it, and if we do, observe what we do with it. This process can take many, many years, more than one lifetime. If we become impatient and inclined to try a faster method, not only are we doomed to failure, but it will take more than one lifetime to get back on track. Some of us have already experienced that before. The Mahatmas learned a lot from their experiment in the 1880s. One result is that they retreated back behind their curtain of secrecy and anonymity, and it isn’t hard to see why. They and their agents were assailed from all sides, by scientists, religious people, and spiritualists, but their most severe critics were their former friends that they had tried to help to gain understanding. How could they focus on working for the benefit of humanity while being attacked 24 hours a day? It will probably be a long time before they try something like that again. Nothing is out in the open now. It isn’t through large groups that they work, but their efforts are concentrated on a few individuals who work together with a few other individuals. Progress comes through very small groups, not through large organizations. Those large organizations serve a purpose too, to preserve the original teachings and make sure they remain available to the world, and to serve as a starting point for a few brave souls who are willing to make the tremendous effort required for self-transformation into an intelligent, purified, discerning instrument, willing to give up cherished but inaccurate ideas, and motivated by pure love of humanity, to be trained further after lifetimes of effort to attain that intermediate goal of becoming an accepted chela. These are they with whom they communicate.

PREFACE APOLOGY: I hate how long this post is, but there are so many nuances that are applicable to the intricacies of my situation - so for best chance of receiving tangible advice, I felt I had to give a good amount info (this is just the tip of the iceberg lol but I'll save the rest for the Titanic)
First: Explanation of title above; I am a first-gen college and current medical student. The relevancy here is I come from low-income and uneducated (does not mean stupid or that you need to be educated to know about financing or alternative solutions at all) parents who don't know much about how to approach finding options as it pertains to either acaedmia or financing
Second: In full transparency, my mental and physical health is hanging on by a thread so while I very much want honesty, any advice along the lines of "you're SOL", "damn that sucks...medicine isn't for everyone", or "it just is what is is", while valid thoughts, would only further harm me right now. So if tangible advice is not feasible, words of affirmation work wonders as well <3 THANK YOU IN ADVANCE FOR EVEN CLICKING ON THIS AND/OR READING THIS
Situation overview:
Without going into too much detail, I am essentially on what is commonly referred to as a "research year" in med school - which is when you take a year in between the normal four years to do research. This can also be used to catch up on exams, finish academic makeups, or slow down due to life circumstances while remaining an active student. These years are less than half-time where I go, which means that students qualify for zero federal or state financial aid for living expenses. From what I understand, a lot of students traverse this via one of the following: paid research positions (2 birds, 1 stone but extremely competitive and hard to find), financial support from family, obtaining a private student loan, or simply getting a full-time job (depending on if they have remaining academic items to finish first or if they don't want to do an LOA but still need a break and don't have anything academically to catch up on).
Applying above dynamics to my circumstances:
Personally, I had a major med school exam to finish and a couple smaller ones after during said research year. Originally, my hopes and intentions were to do research during this year, but life and changes in school policy resulted in that not being the case. At the start of this year 20 months ago, I was extremely open with faculty about my needing to get a job in addition to these academic requirements, despite our common shared opinion that the aforementioned exam is itself a full-time job and is extremely high stakes. However, since they stated they could not offer me any grants or aid, quite literally having a job was a matter of life or death as I needed to eat and afford stable housing. Flash forward, I began communicating how balancing the two was causing me to be spread thin and I was still struggling financially, which resulted in delays in academic progress in terms of exam readiness. The only advice I was given was taking an LOA (which was so frustrating and hurtful as we regularly get grants from donors) - but I was always so against an LOA for much of this time because this seems to be their solution for everything rather than actually finding tangible solutions and student support (have a cold? Take an LOA. Boyfriend dumped you? Take an LOA). Additionally, I knew while on an LOA I could not finish the items required of me since I would not be an active student - so it would solve nothing while further pushing me behind another year from graduating. Flash forward, I've had 7 months of food insecurity, using food pantries, utilities being cut off, trying to maintain some semblance of self-worth and mental health.....all while trying to be a med student. I also don't feel bad for myself, it sucks, but I'm not new to this, I'm true to this" life lol. I have just been trying to navigate the situation to the best of my ability - because even though I don't feel this way right now - I'm meant to be here and deserve to be here. I have overcome far to much to get here to begin with.
I can't go into why - but essentially, right or wrong, this is make or break for me. And I have 6 weeks to get said remaining academic criteria done (preparing for it is a full-time job). The school has since gotten the year that I'm on to qualify as half-time enrollment status, so students will get aid and don't have the problem I am having. However, this change doesn't apply to me (naturally lol), as it will only be in effect for new students starting out on said year.
Summary/overview of current sitution:

• no guidance or financial support institutionally, but with increasing alluded consequences
  
• family who is helping as much as they can but is also low-income
  
• credit score is poofair range (624 Transunion, 596 Equifax) that doesn't qualify for private student loans (even with a co-signer as my parent also does not meet requirements) or new credit cards + $17 in my account and no additional money in sight
  
• spent the last two weeks looking for remote work I could balance with exam prep, GoFundMe didn't gather much, already sold most of the clothes and shoes I own, can't get paid to donate blood due to anemia that developed this year from food insecurity, grocery delivering in my town earns less than minimum wage with the gas you use that isn't reimbursed
  

What can I do? I am beginning to look into emergency personal loans, but I really don't understand how these types of loans and pay day loans work? Does the APR kick-in after 30 days? If so, if you pay it earlier do you avoid all the APR? How soon can you get these deposited into your account if approved? I'm sure it's all specific to each lender but according to my initial loan match, my APR would be 99% lmao. I essentially only need 2k in personal loans to get me to July and finish this exam. My hope would be to use $200-$300 of these funds to apply for online MPH programs that starts in July (I've always wanted to do this anyways while in med school), which would qualify me for financial aid that I could get in the next couple weeks and then I could use these funds to pay off payday/emergency loans by July - which is when I will be all in the clear and can get a full-time job OR take an LOA without dire consequences academically - and will be able to finish required exam in the next 6 weeks.
Final info is that I asked about taking an LOA given extreme circumstance, and I was told no/that it would not be good in the long term (sort of implying I could get dismissed as soon as I come back for not taking the exam by 6 week deadline)
ANY TIPS/ADVICE ON LOOPHOLES TO NAVIGATE THIS IN ADDITION TO PERSONAL LOANS AND MPH/FIN-AID OPTIONS STATED ABOVE WOULD BE IMMENSELY APPRECIATED.

truly on high copium right now hoping to pull through….i know lsat isn’t the type of exam where you can see massive improvements quickly but does anyone have any tips? especially for like inference and most strongly supported questions and rc in general? i’m both blind reviewing and using the loophole’s camo review and watching explanation videos on the questions i’m getting wrong. i understand why i’m got specific questions wrong but i find it hard to apply that to my skills.

(See update at the end) Some context before I (32m) get into the situation as I feel it's important to how I reacted. I have been in two situations, one as a 6-year-old and at 28, that involved women and unwanted touching and beyond in both occasions I have been powerless as a child or incapacitated as an adult like unable to control my bowels or bladder kind of incapacitated. Both my wife and my guest are aware of my past. I'm trying to keep this broad stroke so as not to violate any rules, but again I think this context is important.
So on to the current situation. We currently have a (26f) friend who is living out of a tent, and we often invite her over so she can do laundry, shower, and other hygiene tasks. In this instance, I decided to hop onto my computer and play some games while she did her stuff and hung out with the wife while I chatted back and forth with them a bit. As she wrapped up her visit, she approached me from behind and hit me with a hairbrush not hard just to get my attention. It for sure startled me, and I did snap at her telling her to stop. I looked up at her from my chair, and she does it again, and I tell her to stop again while making direct eye contact with her, which she doesn't doing it once more and then demanding I hug her, which I refuse to do, telling her very clearly "fuck no, I don't want to touch you," and I follow that up with if you keep going like this I'm going to kick you out. She gives me a kinda laugh and says whatever, I'm leaving anyway and then touches me again.
I get to my feet now both extremely panicky feeling and angry we have a bit of a scuffle not a fight, and I end up shouting at her to leave and not come back. I felt entirely violated in my own home during all this, but both her and my wife insist it was just a game and she did not mean it despite me telling her no repeatedly and both my wife and the guest hearing it. I'm for sure not saying my behavior was great, and I've been seeking long-term treatment to help with my issues both mainly being PTSD related to my time as an Army MP and the events mentioned in my personal life. Despite that, I 100% should not have acted in anger like I did.
So am I wrong for feeling the way I do? Or is the wife and the guest right and it was just a game and she didn't mean it.
EDIT: to be 100% upfront it escalated and I reacted (badly) physicality was involved but as also pointed out I was near panicked and overwhelmed due to my past.
EDIT 2: EDIT: Gonna try and respond to a few more posts then I've gotta have a break. I do thank everyone that took the time to write out comments or interact with me.
Edit 3?: My husband gave me access to this account, and I told him I wrote down my perspective. When I asked if I should add it, he said "it's up to you." So here it is.
Our friend approached my husband, who was playing an online cooperative action game on his computer, at his desk. I was sitting on the couch about 8 feet behind them, waiting for my friend to be ready for me to drive her home. She was wearing a long night shirt with a loose v-neck. She stood at his left side peripheral for about 2 seconds before she tapped the back of her hairbrush firmly against the side of his left shoulder. I immediately was not comfortable with this, as I don't tend to engage in horseplay unless someone else has repeatedly demonstrated to me that it's a method of expression that they like and want. I do enjoy my husband's frequent physicality with me, including picking me up or tickling me. My friend and husband have engaged in horseplay on many occasions before, tickling, poking at one another's stomach, and playfully throwing soft objects. This often included my friend's fiance, who usually only reciprocated with my friend. I will frequently smack my husband on the butt, but only when I am sure he is in a mood to be okay with it.
My husband said, "Hey, I'm busy," and didn't turn to her at first. She hit him again with the brush in the same spot, and my husband said "stop" in a normal voice, and my friend responded, saying "give me a hug (which we almost always all do at the end of visits). I don't remember if she hit him again, because he said (and I'm going to paraphrase, because at this point I began to get alarmed, and was only listening to the tone of his voice, and less to his words, unfortunately) that if she didn't stop, he'd make her leave. She said lightly that it didn't matter anyway; she was leaving. At this point, I realized by her teasing tone that she didn't understand how upset he was getting, which I did understand, through years of experience with his tone of voice and what it means. He didn't raise his voice, and I could hear that he was attempting to remain casual as he said something else, ending with "my dude" but that she had really pushed him past the point of anger and I didn't think she realized it. She put her hand on his shoulder, and he said "I don't want to fucking touch you now" and he stood up, and grabbed her by the neck of her shirt, pulling her foreward, and then put both hands around her throat, and I saw his hands tense, as he leaned down into her face and told her to leave the house and never come back. He pushed her backwards and she started to cry, and put her head down, hurrying to get pick up her things. My husband sat back down at his desk and didn't say anything else until I told him I was going to take the friend home and I'd be back, and he said "sure." The friend cried during the ride home, and her voice was harsh, but I wasn't sure if it was stress or physical. She did have marks on her throat, but those faded over the next few hours. She asked me repeatedly why he got so upset, and if anything was different, and I did point out to her that he said "stop," and she said that she thought it was part of the play. When I returned home, my husband did not seem upset, and seemed more relaxed than before, although he seemed nervous about my response to the situation. He said that he didn't remember putting his hands around her throat when I told him that he did.
My thoughts about this are that: 1) horseplaying with people with trauma, which all three of us have, to various degrees and in various forms, is potentially dangerous, and I'm frequently uncomfortable when it happens, although I often don't say anything, as I'm usually the odd one out when it comes to initiating social teasing, although I often enjoy receiving it.
2.) Our friend should have stopped at the word stop. I don't know why she didn't, but I don't think it was out of malice, because she genuinely did not seem to see how she was provoking him.
3.) Her actions were inappropriate, in my opinion, but his were potentially life-threatening and the fact that he didn't remember what he did was alarming. I am concerned that this will happen again, and he will have charges pressed in a situation where he is the first physical aggressor. This would be even worse if he inadvertently harms someone, and the escalation of force combined with memory issues in this latest case makes me worry that it might happen.
4.) I possibly could have prevented this from happening by being quicker stopping her or by getting between them, but I know from experience that once he has a grip on someone, I'm not strong enough to break it, and he ignores my presence or physically shakes me off if I try. He ignores my words entirely at these times. I expected her to see that he was upset before he snapped, because it seemed obvious to me, but she didn't, and I have no idea why. She's had lots of trauma of her own (as have I, including SA) in the past (and, like me, has worked in jobs that revolve around dealing with people dealing with trauma).

This post is very long. This first section, before the first triple-line-break, is the summary. Details follow that.
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SUMMARY
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So, I was very much looking forward to Legendary Tales for a while now after hearing so many great things.
I bought it on sale a couple days ago and played the first hour or so, completing the tutorial and entering the main hub. Then I uninstalled and refunded it.
This is not a 'hate post' and I hope that this post will not only help people understand some of the issues of this game, and what this game is NOT, but also help people understand what this game is and why you might love it. I talked about my criticisms with others who love the game to help me approach this and hopefully deliver some useful thoughts. It's worth noting that I got lots of agreement about my criticisms from the people I talked to - who still love the game.
In short,
People love this game for the combat development in the context of a 40+ hour adventure. All the depth to the skill trees, which of course in my hour I didn't touch. The creativity of building the mechanics of a character RPG style - except you get to physically battle in VR. The reward of unlocking that cool skill you've been excited to try out, or finding a legendary that's a blast to use. Even in my short time with the game I could feel the beginnings of this with the parry system. I did have fun fighting skeletons with a simple sword and no skills, and felt the challenge as I had to aim my sword deflections well and time my counterstrikes. There is an effective mechanic preventing waggle-fest and I can begin to imagine all the room to develop your combat mechanics in a way that is, fun and rewarding, and uniquely VR.
Sounds great right? To some it truly is.
But to me, not so much. Why? Because everything else is lacking to a degree I did not expect.
I've been playing a lot of The Light Brigade lately. And although these two games are totally different, it's a useful game to bring up because The Light Brigade excels in all the ways that Legendary Tales significantly falls short.
Atmosphere - music and sound, lighting and colours, art design, character and enemy models
Interfacing - Onboarding and intuitive learning, UI design and fluidity, control mapping, options, grabbing/interacting with objects, general polish
Storytelling - Plot, lore, world building, characters, character and enemy expressiveness, writing
For many people who play games, combat is at the forefront of their interests. For me, it always takes a backseat priority - if its present at all - to the above three aspects. The combat in Bloodborne is great, but it is because it excels in those 3 aspects that it's one of my favourite games. I also love lengthy games like Pentiment, Disco Elysium, Planescape Torment, and Pathologic 2, which have minimal or no combat and lots of reading!
Legendary Tales is simply mediocre in those three bolded aspects and for me that's a hard pass. If these aspects were serviceable to me - done well enough to facilitate the combat - I might have kept going. But I don't use the world 'mediocre' lightly. This is the appropriate word to me, and because of that, I did not want to spend 40+ hours in this world.
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DETAILS
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For those interested, or for the developers, I will continue with a breakdown of these aspects I am criticizing, trying to go through everything I felt about them in the first hour or so of playing.
Main menu was my favourite part. I liked the scene + music together. Nice. I was looking forward to playing and this had me feeling fuzzy and ready to enjoy the game. Unfortunately, it was not to be.
The very first issue I noticed was that the game felt washed out. Even in that main menu I liked, I was feeling like it was a bit washed out. So I tried adjusting brightness down... then the darker areas felt better, but the light areas felt off. The more I played and tried to adjust to find the right equilibrium, the more I realized the lighting and contrast is just not good and adjusting brightness can't save that.
The second issue I noticed was the menu cursor to select things. It felt like an early VR game that hadn't quite figured out VR menus yet. It's useable but not fluid and pleasing.
The third issue I noticed was the unintuitive controls. I thought that this was the kind of game, kind of like a Souls game, where you aren't taught everything but learn things as you go in an organic manner. Maybe some of that exists in this game, but mostly it's simply bad control design and a bad tutorial. It's the difference between having barriers that have purpose, purposeful friction, and feel good when discovered vs barriers that feel pointless and just build frustration without purpose. The controls feel like a mess and while it's apparent that people can get used to them as they play more, it's not in a justified sense.
Along with this are interfacing issues. For example, grabbing items feels very awkward. The motions are clunky, for example the way a weapon will slowly glide into place in your hands. There's so many interfacing issues. The interface to see weapon/item stats on weapons that are laying about is clunky, the interface to switch weapons is clunky, the magic interface is clunky, dialogue boxes feel clunky,... all of these things feel clunky both in terms of feel and also aesthetic.
A very straightforward and obvious example is dialogue. Character dialogue is presented in a large bland text on a page. To progress through the dialogue, there's no obvious place to click or button to push. In fact, you have to click a particular area of the page, which feels totally arbitrary and unintuitive. Sure, once you learn, you can do it fine, but it's just bad interface design.
To go back to The Light Brigade, think about the difference in both feel and aesthetic to opening a chest or breaking a pot. Grabbing a gun and how it arrives to your hand. The attractive dialogue boxes. Watching a reward pop out of a chest, picking a tarot card. Putting objects into your waist pouch or taking them out. These interactions are all comfortable, beautiful, fluid, and intuitive.
The next thing on my mind was sound.
As I played the tutorial, the soundscape was barren. There was a wind loop, which didn't loop correctly leaving a solid second of space between the end and beginning. Sounds didn't feel like they were placed quite right in 3D space. Point-based sounds (like the crackling of a campfire, that comes from a specific point in space) had too small of a zone (the sound should be heard from further away). In general the soundscape was very barebones. And when I encountered the first character, not only did the character look totally goofy and out of place, but they made no sounds when 'speaking', not even grunts or gibberish sound.
To skip ahead for a moment, I also felt the music did not match the environments enough. The music was quite pretty - that's not the problem. It just didn't feel like the environments were quite synergized with the music.
Again for both music and sound, think of the gun sounds, the ability sounds, the sound of the enemies as they spot you, the sound of the environment, the footsteps and dash, the grunts of characters when the speak, the music... not only does it all sound great, but it all feels like expressions of the unique world of The Light Brigade. This is excellent sound and music design, that truly bring the world to life.
Although a minor complaint, I also noticed lots of grammar and spelling errors. Although I understand the team is in South Korea, and I appreciate the challenges of translation, just like with everything else I was just expecting... more polish. I thought it would feel like a full package, at indie scale. But it feels very much like a partial package.
And that segues into the writing...
There are games with simple and/or unmemorable story, where the story is still servicing and facilitating the gameplay.
And then there is just plain bad writing.
This is very much the latter.
Maybe a bit of this goes back to translation but I am doubtful that it fares much better in original Korean in essence.
The writing is goofy, juvenile, poorly structured, and generic.
I was also seriously turned off by a couple lines in particular, that I'm sure affect me more than most but I will mention anyways. One was something like "valuable gem missing. And a hot girl". Like... There's nothing inherent about calling a woman (or a man) hot that I don't like. Yes gamers, you are allowed to find women attractive, relax. But it's the way its written,... I'm not going to turn this into an essay about male gaze but the way its written simply services a particular male audience that casually objectifies women.
Even worse was the final line I read, a quest line. Paraphrasing, but the primary descriptive words are all exact: "Go kill 10 kill peasants in a refugee camp". I don't think I need to elaborate, people who are on a similar page to me will understand why this was just an incredibly gross line.
I know the above two dialogue criticisms will not be shared by everyone and not affect everyone the same way. I am expressing them as part of what I felt, my personal criticisms and experience, just like the rest of what I'm sharing.
Again to compare to The Light Brigade... every line feels thoughtful and builds character and develops the lore. Whether its the forlorn lines of NPC members of The Light Brigade, or the scenes that appear between runs, and other bits and pieces you get. The Light Brigade develops so much world with few words, it's quite impressive and again a beacon that Urban Wolf Games can learn from.
The final issue I'll discuss was something that struck me earlier on. That is, player character model and lack of customization.
First of all - again an issue that the majority here probably won't be affected by - I could not pick my character model until after completing the tutorial. Specifically, I was forced to do calibration as a male character model, and then had to play the tutorial as this character. Minor complaint but again just another polish issue.
Both male and female models are just... boring designs, and the female model is again very juvenile, obviously serving a primarily male audience, whether intentionally or not.
But more importantly, there's no character customization. Not even the tiniest bit. Even the ability to change just skin colour and hair only would go a long way. Especially in a lengthy adventure like this, I need to be able to identify with my character. Especially with multiplayer it seems essential to me, but even if it were single player, and as someone who plays primarily in single player, character customization is hugely impactful to me.
This does not really have a contrast in The Light Brigade - there's no character customization in The Light Brigade either, although the kind of game it is, it's not as relevant. That said, I do think it would be a nice touch if there WAS some minor character customization in The Light Brigade, and especially if you could play as a woman instead of man if you so choose. Although maybe lore-wise it is intended that all members are male except for 'Mother'. This hasn't been established with any good reason though. So on this point I would lightly criticize The Light Brigade as well.
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ENDING THOUGHTS
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Ultimately, Legendary Tales is quite simply a very indie game that probably had a very small team and limited funds. I don't know for sure, but probably there *wasn't* a dedicated writer, a dedicated UI and interface designer, etc.
However, these things are still failings of the game and its design. The greatest indie games to me are ones that successfully recognize their scope limitations and develop something complete within that scope. Whether it's the roguelike world of The Light Brigade, or the very short and stylish Tiger Blade, or Jeff Minter's trippy games like Akka Arrh and Polybius, or the retro Silent Hill aesthetic of Organ Quarter, or the suspenseful hotel of Propagation Paradise Hotel... all these games are made by small teams but successfully navigate their limited funds to deliver a full package within an appropriately limited scope.
On the one hand, I really value and support BJ's push for indie games to be respected and for that respect to reflect in the price consumers are prepared to pay. But after being totally on board with the price of Legendary Tales based on what I read from BJ and reviewers and many regular players too, I have to disagree with this game's pricing. This game is not polished enough, and is not a full package. That the game sucked out so much funds is an error of scope.
Maybe I will be in the minority, and Legendary Tales has been a success so it seems that I am, and so good on them for knowing the value of their game to the demographic they targeted I guess. And regardless, even if the pricing and attempted scope of the game are an error on the dev's part, I'm glad for the dev to earn back as much as they can, or even turn a profit hopefully.
But to me, reflecting back to the question the devs put forward: "Do you want to see deep combat development like this in VR for a 40+ hour adventure from indie devs?" The answer is no, I don't. I do consider the scope of this game an error on the part of the developers. It sounds like they did not even turn a profit enough to allow them to expand their team (but maybe I'm misunderstanding). I hope that they do continue with VR development, but instead focus on a much smaller scope game. Deliver a polished, complete package within a smaller scope, implementing a much tighter budget that will allow for potential turning of profit with an appropriately lighter sale price (maybe targeting a $30 game?).
If that is successful, do it again, and again, until they can expand and eventually work toward their dream adventure RPG, hiring actual writers and UI designers and sound designers etc. For me personally, this is simply not the kind of game you can half-bake. It should be attempted again when, and only when, they feel they have budget to do this in a truly full and polished manner.
I had the pleasure of meeting BJ briefly at PAX East. He struck me as friendly, kind, totally genuine, and incredibly passionate as a game developer and a VR game developer in particular.
I do wish this team good luck and despite my own harsh criticism I am glad so many ARE enjoying this game, and also feel the price point is justified. I want devs to earn money, including Urban Wolf Games. And I hope that they will continue to develop and bring more VR to the world.
I hope that my criticism is constructive and useful toward these same goals.

(See update at the end) Some context before I (32m) get into the situation as I feel it's important to how I reacted. I have been in two situations, one as a 6-year-old and at 28, that involved women and unwanted touching and beyond in both occasions I have been powerless as a child or incapacitated as an adult like unable to control my bowels or bladder kind of incapacitated. Both my wife and my guest are aware of my past. I'm trying to keep this broad stroke so as not to violate any rules, but again I think this context is important.
So on to the current situation. We currently have a (26f) friend who is living out of a tent, and we often invite her over so she can do laundry, shower, and other hygiene tasks. In this instance, I decided to hop onto my computer and play some games while she did her stuff and hung out with the wife while I chatted back and forth with them a bit. As she wrapped up her visit, she approached me from behind and hit me with a hairbrush not hard just to get my attention. It for sure startled me, and I did snap at her telling her to stop. I looked up at her from my chair, and she does it again, and I tell her to stop again while making direct eye contact with her, which she doesn't doing it once more and then demanding I hug her, which I refuse to do, telling her very clearly "fuck no, I don't want to touch you," and I follow that up with if you keep going like this I'm going to kick you out. She gives me a kinda laugh and says whatever, I'm leaving anyway and then touches me again.
I get to my feet now both extremely panicky feeling and angry we have a bit of a scuffle not a fight, and I end up shouting at her to leave and not come back. I felt entirely violated in my own home during all this, but both her and my wife insist it was just a game and she did not mean it despite me telling her no repeatedly and both my wife and the guest hearing it. I'm for sure not saying my behavior was great, and I've been seeking long-term treatment to help with my issues both mainly being PTSD related to my time as an Army MP and the events mentioned in my personal life. Despite that, I 100% should not have acted in anger like I did.
So am I wrong for feeling the way I do? Or is the wife and the guest right and it was just a game and she didn't mean it.
EDIT: to be 100% upfront it escalated and I reacted (badly) physicality was involved but as also pointed out I was near panicked and overwhelmed due to my past.
EDIT 2: EDIT: Gonna try and respond to a few more posts then I've gotta have a break. I do thank everyone that took the time to write out comments or interact with me.
Edit 3?: My husband gave me access to this account, and I told him I wrote down my perspective. When I asked if I should add it, he said "it's up to you." So here it is.
Our friend approached my husband, who was playing an online cooperative action game on his computer, at his desk. I was sitting on the couch about 8 feet behind them, waiting for my friend to be ready for me to drive her home. She was wearing a long night shirt with a loose v-neck. She stood at his left side peripheral for about 2 seconds before she tapped the back of her hairbrush firmly against the side of his left shoulder. I immediately was not comfortable with this, as I don't tend to engage in horseplay unless someone else has repeatedly demonstrated to me that it's a method of expression that they like and want. I do enjoy my husband's frequent physicality with me, including picking me up or tickling me. My friend and husband have engaged in horseplay on many occasions before, tickling, poking at one another's stomach, and playfully throwing soft objects. This often included my friend's fiance, who usually only reciprocated with my friend. I will frequently smack my husband on the butt, but only when I am sure he is in a mood to be okay with it.
My husband said, "Hey, I'm busy," and didn't turn to her at first. She hit him again with the brush in the same spot, and my husband said "stop" in a normal voice, and my friend responded, saying "give me a hug (which we almost always all do at the end of visits). I don't remember if she hit him again, because he said (and I'm going to paraphrase, because at this point I began to get alarmed, and was only listening to the tone of his voice, and less to his words, unfortunately) that if she didn't stop, he'd make her leave. She said lightly that it didn't matter anyway; she was leaving. At this point, I realized by her teasing tone that she didn't understand how upset he was getting, which I did understand, through years of experience with his tone of voice and what it means. He didn't raise his voice, and I could hear that he was attempting to remain casual as he said something else, ending with "my dude" but that she had really pushed him past the point of anger and I didn't think she realized it. She put her hand on his shoulder, and he said "I don't want to fucking touch you now" and he stood up, and grabbed her by the neck of her shirt, pulling her foreward, and then put both hands around her throat, and I saw his hands tense, as he leaned down into her face and told her to leave the house and never come back. He pushed her backwards and she started to cry, and put her head down, hurrying to get pick up her things. My husband sat back down at his desk and didn't say anything else until I told him I was going to take the friend home and I'd be back, and he said "sure." The friend cried during the ride home, and her voice was harsh, but I wasn't sure if it was stress or physical. She did have marks on her throat, but those faded over the next few hours. She asked me repeatedly why he got so upset, and if anything was different, and I did point out to her that he said "stop," and she said that she thought it was part of the play. When I returned home, my husband did not seem upset, and seemed more relaxed than before, although he seemed nervous about my response to the situation. He said that he didn't remember putting his hands around her throat when I told him that he did.
My thoughts about this are that: 1) horseplaying with people with trauma, which all three of us have, to various degrees and in various forms, is potentially dangerous, and I'm frequently uncomfortable when it happens, although I often don't say anything, as I'm usually the odd one out when it comes to initiating social teasing, although I often enjoy receiving it.
2.) Our friend should have stopped at the word stop. I don't know why she didn't, but I don't think it was out of malice, because she genuinely did not seem to see how she was provoking him.
3.) Her actions were inappropriate, in my opinion, but his were potentially life-threatening and the fact that he didn't remember what he did was alarming. I am concerned that this will happen again, and he will have charges pressed in a situation where he is the first physical aggressor. This would be even worse if he inadvertently harms someone, and the escalation of force combined with memory issues in this latest case makes me worry that it might happen.
4.) I possibly could have prevented this from happening by being quicker stopping her or by getting between them, but I know from experience that once he has a grip on someone, I'm not strong enough to break it, and he ignores my presence or physically shakes me off if I try. He ignores my words entirely at these times. I expected her to see that he was upset before he snapped, because it seemed obvious to me, but she didn't, and I have no idea why. She's had lots of trauma of her own (as have I, including SA) in the past (and, like me, has worked in jobs that revolve around dealing with people dealing with trauma).

...Just to me. You'd be absolutely precious if we ever fell in love and I don't play around with other people's hearts.
But we aren't quite there yet. I would love to chat for a while though and I am not really trying to impress you I just want a bit of your time.
I'm worth it I swear. I also just swear a lot in general.
Oh man, where the hell did the last decade even go?
It seems I discovered drugs and a decade just disappeared and I was 21 like three days ago. I'm sober now but it feels like l time traveled for a few years and now my life is stable and kinda boring and I dunno what to do with myself.
Now I'm 30 and kinda feel like a dinosaur most of the time since I have been a waiter or host my entire adult life. Decent money but most people abandon it after a few years and my coworkers are always about a decade younger than me. I dunno who the hell thought I deserved to be in charge but I was the idiot who stayed long enough that I run the place. It is kind of nice being the one telling others what to do but it does get old after a while. I wonder what other job I could get myself into while I'm still relatively fit and young. I found myself explaining what dial up internet was to a coworker and realized that maybe I should get into a new line of work before people started calling me grandpa.
It'll do for now though because life used to be really fucking hard and now it's easy for a change and I've got a lot of free time. This is kind of just a stream of unfiltered thoughts and I dunno why the hell you're reading it because I'm full of shit but I'm glad you stopped by and your company is welcome.
I actually feel like someone worth dating for a change so I am here ranting away trying to find another soul that never shuts up and has the endless enthusiasm for life that I do.
Because I love to experience new things and not everything was bad over the past decade. I fell in love a couple times and my life was good in those moments and I wonder if I could do that again. If people in this modern society want to slow down for a while and get to know someone for a while.
That is what love is to me. Or at least part of what makes it. To be completely known and understood, and appreciated for exactly that and nothing more.
I want to travel and see new things and I can get a job anywhere with my skill set so I always imagine going to someone else because I've figured out that home is where my favorite person is, it isn't really about the place.
I'll be at home when I can experience someone else and share a life with them. Understand them. Be at peace with them.
A man can dream at least and I have always been deeply passionate and touchy feely in the way I love and I've never really been shy either. Intimacy has never been a complaint someone has had about me and if anything was the only thing holding together one of my past relationships.
But I want someone I can appreciate as a friend too, and who I get along with amazingly well. A woman with a sharp mind is always endlessly sexy to me.
I have no idea where she is right now, but even if it's a small chance maybe she is here somewhere reading these posts aimlessly then it's worth a shot.
I actually did meet someone I met on here once but it didn't work out and I'll tell you about it later. I wouldn't mind trying again with someone more... Stable.
It's stupid little teenager like fantasies that keep me going sometimes. I can't be the only one.
I am nothing special. Tall but not the most handsome. Not ugly either but I don't see something amazing when I look in the mirror. Just a freckled white guy with brown eyes and an average. I am relatively fit but definitely no athlete with a six pack.
But I could find something special with someone else and I haven't given up on it because if I experienced it before when my life was even worse then it should be a better experience and possible now.
Unless the world has just given up on romance.
It will be a sad rest of my life if we are bound to live alone. I always thought I would make a cool ass dad and I want to have that experience before I die and I've always imagined sticking with whoever I had those kids with forever. I'm not asking you to be a housewife hell I would even be a stay at home dad of I had to if it meant I got to have the chance to raise a family of my own one day.
I guess the reasons millennials all treat their pets like babies is because we are too poor to have real ones.
So who are you?
If not have a lovely day.

Ever had a lucid dream where you did some really questionable or even immoral stuff? In those dreams, you probably noticed that normal ideas of right and wrong just don't matter. That’s because, when you're lucid dreaming, you’re in control, kind of like playing god. You get to create and shape everything in your dream world.
This made me think a lot about life and the idea of a higher power. If there’s a god, why is our world so full of challenges, suffering, and cruelty? Why would a divine creator make life so hard for us?
After diving into lucid dreaming, I started wondering: what if we're just characters in some grand, divine dream? Maybe we’re like the subconscious creations of a higher consciousness. Just like the characters in our dreams are part of our subconscious, maybe we are part of a divine subconscious.
This idea made me think about what reality really is and our place in it. If we are part of a divine dream, it could explain why life feels so random and harsh. Our struggles and experiences might be pieces of a bigger, unknowable plan, just like events in a dream are part of a story made by the dreamer.
Maybe god gave us the ability to lucid dream to demonstrate that he can do whatever he wants and there is no reason behind it. he just have the power to do it so he does it just like us in a lucid dreams.

i feel like kind of a loser these days for posting on reddit but i don’t feel like bothering my one friend who actually listens to me. i’ve been working this retail job for almost year and a half now and im really friendly with most of my coworkers. we’re all 16-18 and we get along really well. in the beginning id try to ask people to hang out but no one was ever available. i accepted it and just thought everyone at work had their own thing going on and its normally hard to become friends friends with your coworkers. i’ve come to find out that people from work hang out from time to time and it makes me really sad. why does no one ever consider me? this happens in like all my walks of life, no one really wants to spend time with me

Do you know what sucks about this post? I don't want to write it! Bertrand is my second favorite character in TRR. First is Olivia. And looking back, it's amazing how little he accomplishes.
He really doesn't help much beyond being the romance. Maxwell does a lot more of the work. Bertrand mostly provides the ticket if that makes sense.
Bertrand had little, if anything, to do that helped with the Anton situation. Or the Auvernal situation. Or the Via Imperil mess. He does have some value with Barthelemy however.
He only gets together with Savannah because of the MC. He cannot manage his own love life.
He couldn't even get Savannah's saddle on her own! He needed the MC for that too!
Oh and apparently he's always in the wrong with Savannah. She doesn't make mistakes. Only Bertrand.
The Walker family makes fun of him for being a bad farmer. I guess Savannah agrees since she doesn't defend him.
He's made a complete mockery in Maxwell's movie. This actually hurts him, but nobody seems to really care.
Because he's not a part of the mc's harem, he's not a member of the Royal Council. OK, jokes aside, why wasn't he or Olivia invited?
Bertrand never manages to fund his house. It takes Maxwell writing a profitable novel to fund the house.
He doesn't manage funds either. He does that so poorly that he gives all control to Barthelemy.
When Bertrand pretends to side with Barthelemy. Everyone just shrugs and goes: "Ok, Bertrand is evil now." No hyperbole. Just imagine if Olivia or the LIs did the same thing. It would make just as much sense.
Okay, I know what PB was going for. They wanted someone hard working and traditional. Someone who believes in honor, dignity and loyalty. The problem is that they didn't want the LIs making too many mistakes so I think Bertrand got more than his fair share.
And because he tries to conduct himself in a dignified manner, it makes him an easy target for jokes.
I honestly think they made two big mistakes: not letting him have direct victories and making the MC too involved with his love life.
The only victories Bertrand has are when he fools everyone into thinking he works with Barthelemy and when he stands up to a cowboy at a wedding. And the second one just felt forced.
And yeah, because the MC more or less handles Bertrand's romance, it makes it look like he and Savannah will get divorced the moment the MC steps away.
Like I said initially, Bertrand is my second favorite character in TRR. This list doesn't change that. It also doesn't change I wish that PB didn't keep screwing him over.