I used to watch a lot of Klopp's press conferences, and from time to time, he'd say something insightful. Even though it's in the context of talking about football, they're nice lessons for life in general. I hope this isn't strange. Here's some:
"for me the only way I understand, the only way i can do it, is I have no idea what is in may, april, february, january. I have no idea, but I know that we play watford tomorrow. That's enough as a problem"
"I don't tell them (players) everything I know, I only tell them what they should know, to not overwhelm them and keep them effective"
"If my team wins, it is on them, and if we lose, it is on me."
"a game is a summary of momentum. When you have it, you have to use it effectively"
"for a really good game, you have to gain this really good feeling, step by step by step, and we never had that in the first half. It never felt really right for us. If we scored a goal to draw in the second half, it wouldn't have made the first half better, it would've just made the result better."
"We created a lot of chances, didn't score with them, now we have to create more and use them. When you don't score, it always has this impact... your mood drops, instead of going: who cares? A missed chance is just information, nothing else, but we don't do that well in the moment"
"there's no system in the world which is perfect, which means you can use these kind of things"
“We believe he has everything needed to fit into our way and adapt to the Premier League, both physically and mentally. He is a player who is hungry for success and knows you have to fight to get what you want. He is a fighter, no doubt. He’s a skillful team player who has always the goal in mind." on signing luis diaz
"The disruption I udnerstand. I think a lot of people on the outside who are not with us will be happy blah blah, it's your job to ask uncomfortable questions... The distraction comes from outside, but to get distracted, you always need two parts: the one who's distracting and the one who let it happen, and we will not let it happen."
"what did I tell him that he did what he did?" on taking responsibility for a player's performance
"you get the results, not the process. Don't forget" to journalist asking about transfer bids
"In the end, of course you wanna win a game, but it's all about the performance. Usually the mother of all results is the performance. If we're 1 nil down, let's win the second half, then we get a point, then we can try to win the game. But the good things we have to keep doing"
"We won the Champions League the next year, going again. We don’t win the league by a point, but win it the year after. So this period is a complete comeback, which is insane. We could have given up but it is just not in my DNA. I suffer like crazy after these things, just not for long. It’s how I said after the last Champions League final we lost. I decided before that, if it doesn’t happen, I will not waste a lifetime on suffering. I can’t do that any more."
Bonus (Mané about Klopp):
"He was talking too much and I said, 'Wow, this is going to be tough for me because I'm a little quiet.' Everybody loves him and that is more important, to be honest. He is a bit of a funny guy but at the same time he is a serious guy. Usually when I am talking to him off the pitch it is about personal things. Things about lifestyle and life - and that is important to me. I think I have somebody I can confide in."

Hi ladies. I’m feeling conflicted and some advice would be helpful.
I’m 10 weeks pregnant with my second baby and there is one particular friend I haven’t told yet, well actually them and my sister. The last time I was pregnant I was bombarded with my sisters crappy relationship with her boyfriend and then during the 2nd half of my pregnancy I was bombarded with both my friend and my sisters crappy relationship. This lasted well into my postpartum period when I was struggling with raising a baby with no family support while I also battled PPD.
My friend and my sister are still will these men and their relationships still suck so nothing has really changed. Now I’m pregnant but I’m extremely anxious to say anything to them given my past experience. I’ve told my family, husbands family and my other friends but I feel no desire to inform my friend and sister. I’m afraid things will still be the same since they’re still miserable in their respective relationships. I’ve put some distance between myself and them by reducing contact and taking a step back for my own mental health. I don’t feel like I can communicate my feelings with them because it always slaps me in the face and they make it about their feelings instead of trying to see where I’m coming from and letting me have a moment. This friend of mine calls herself my kids aunt but has never even wished him on his birthday or acknowledged the day, neither has my sister. There’s just no effort so I stopped expecting anything. My kid has other aunts and uncles who love the crap out of him so I focus on the people who actually show up for him. I used to be very close to my friend but that has changed since they met their current partner. The relationship just isn’t the same anymore and I’ve been trying to stay at a distance so I don’t get traumatized again.
Am I being unreasonable? I know I’m flooded with pregnancy hormones so I’m trying to figure out if my reasons are justified. I feel almost overprotective of my mental health this time around since I had such a hard time during my first pregnancy so I’m feeling extra selective regarding the people I allow in my life this time around.

This literally just happened and everything was deleted before I could screenshot.
Mitchie @_misomelon, a finance and career content creator who just moved to NYC, posted a tiktok/reel yesterday where she went to try out Krystal Oh Nails. She regularly does things like this and asks her audience if they would pay x price for x service/product. This review of Krystal Oh Nails was pretty neutral. She mentioned that a lot of other Asian American CC’s go there and rave about it (most famously the Ha sisters and the Alexander sisters) so she was excited to try it out. She loved the ambiance of the place and the nail care her tech did but mentioned that she didn’t quite love the end product and for a price tag of $150 she was eager to see if the nails lasted 4 weeks or longer. Mitchie’s audience said $150 was too high but from what I saw, there was no backlash on the actual Krystal Oh Nail account so it’s not like this sparked a hate train towards the business.
Krystal Oh, the owner, responded on IG reels last night and harshly responded with, “Why are you lying?”. She then reported that she checked their records and Mitchie’s total came to about $102-$122 (she stated two different dollar amounts in the comments vs her TikTok she posted later on so I don’t actually know the real price Krystal thought Mitchie paid). Mitchie responded kindly and said it must have been a misunderstanding because Mitchie had proof that she paid $148- which made her round up to $150 in the video. Krystal Oh then posted on her personal TikTok account going after Mitchie and complained about how people do not respect these services and their prices. The comments were widely making fun of Mitchie and she ended up privating her video because she didn’t want people to come after her or the business and again, kindly said in her comments that running a business can get very personal so she completely understood where Krystal was coming from and that everything was just a misunderstanding.
Mitchie ended up making a response video though to clear her name because people were literally making fun of her for taking down the video. It was a damned if you do, damned if you don’t situation. She shows very clearly in her transactions that she was charged $148 dollars. Once before the appointment as a deposit and then twice on the day of the appointment. It looked like she was charged the deposit twice on accident. Which makes it a complete and total MISUNDERSTANDING.
She then goes on to talk about how she has been both a paying customer and a content creator receiving a service in exchange for exposure and the difference in how you’re treated when you’re just a paying customer sucks. She insinuated that these famous content creators making videos with Krystal Oh are treated nicely because of their status but anyone else gets the shit end of the stick and it’s unfair. Period!
So clearly, after Mitchie’s video a number of people were asking Krystal to publicly apologize and refund Mitchie the extra deposit she was charged. Krystal then makes a post on her personal TikTok AGAIN showing Mitchie’s PERSONAL PHONE NUMBER AND EMAIL and their private conversation they had about the issue. She completely doxxed Mitchie. When this was brought to her attention she deleted all of the videos on the matter and Mitchie did as well. In Mitchie’s comments on her most recent video she states that she was doxxed over a misunderstanding and deleted her videos to protect her peace and safety. And what does Krystal Oh do on her main page during this? She posts a video with Erica Ha to hopefully not bring attention to the hot mess that just transpired on her personal page.
Safe to say I’m concerned at the behavior Krystal displayed. A Quick Look at her Google reviews shows this ain’t her first time being rude to customers who genuinely meant well. The NYC Nail Salon scene sounds horrid.

Hi everyone,
My ex (28F) and I (35M) have been officially done for about half a year now. We had been together for about nine years, have three young children together, moved around, bought a house, and everything else in a long-term relationship that seemed like it was just going to last forever.
About two to three years ago I had found out that she had been cheating on me for many years with a married man (42M) who also has children (two). I was devastated like anyone would be, not eating, being hypervingelent, paranoid, angry, and everything else. This went on for about two years as I just couldn't get past the betrayal.
Before we were done six months ago, the year time period before that she had broken up with me about three or four times, having me move to my dad's a few blocks away because I can't really afford a place on my own with all of the expenses of child care, which I pay for and she pays for the rent where she lives, all of it comes out pretty even cost wise, although I do pay a little bit more. After each break up, however, she would send me the "I miss you" or "I love you" text and I would end up going back with her and we'd just end up in the same place as usual with my bitterness and my paranoia.
Over the last six months I was feeling really good at about the two month mark. I had finally felt like I was moving on and those depressing days were starting to be less and less. There were even points where we would just hang out and do stuff with the kids, her, and I and there was really no pressure at all. This time lasted for about a month when she told me that she was now dating the man she cheated on me with and wanted to introduce him to the kids. At this point I became angry, depressed, and like I had been cheated out of life and the constant feeling of "this can't be real" or "how could someone choose to do this after everything that happened?"
At first I would try to convince her how bad of a person this guy was but reminding her all of the things he has done to his family, which she paid no attention to and would only protect him saying "I don't know him" (although I talk to his ex-wife and she's told me a lot of things that reinforce my thinking). Either way, the first part was anger and trying to convince her. Then it shifted to me trying to convince her to pick me over him by trying to get close to her. There were points where we would cuddle on the couch, she would lay down on me, tell me she missed me, that she still loved me, and I would even stay the night as we cuddled in our underwear in her bed (all while she's "dating" him). I know this part is not good for me character wise but I was in desperation/revenge mode and wasn't really sure what I was doing at all.
Every time I opened up about how much I loved her she would say it won't work or that she's confused by everything. If I stopped contacting her then all of a sudden she would say how much she screwed up/loves me/misses me. This is like a repeat thing she's always done to me and I can't stand it!
About two weeks ago I decided to send her cheater loser a message about all that we had been doing. I didn't read the reply or anything so not sure what happened but I told her I told him. The day after she was upset but then she had a flat tire and guess who she called? That's right, the guy who she cheated on, me! lol I helped, just like I always do, and we ended up hugging and stuff later on. Still, she doesn't want to be together and thinks the cheater loser is better. There's a lot more of her taking advantage of me that I'm not going to write about but it's a never ending story.
Either way, to the current state of where I am. I've been reading non-stop on surviving a cheater and narcisism, and I finally felt I could have some empathy for myself. She used me, manipulated me, lied to me, and didn't really care what would happen to me if she cheated (even if she says she does). She's made me feel like I'm the reason for everything bad and I bought into it for years. The truth is, I've always been there for her, the kids, worked my butt off so we could buy a home, go on trips, and everything else. I would always talk to her, hug her, and everything felt great for years. But now I kind of see the veil lifting for who she really is and I'm just wondering why it's so hard to move on? Like what am I missing?
Today she wanted me to come with to get photographs done for her and the kids but I told her I'm not coming with. When she picked them up she still wanted me to come with but I told her no. This is the point of me wanting to finally just cut things off and heal myself. As much as I wish I could hold her at night and all of this would go away I also know that if I go back to her I'll end up in the same depression I always do.
Can someone tell me I'm doing the right thing? Should I be trying to win her back even though she chose him over me? Will she try to get back with me one day if I just finally end things and only talk about the kids when necessary? Am I crazy?
Thank You All In Advance

Recently started on Huel again after about 5 years without it. I've opted for Black this time and with a goal of losing weight, I'm having a Huel for breakfast and lunch (with a small snack between each meal) and then a regular, healthy dinner in the evening. I've been on it about ten days now.
I don't remember having any stomach issues previously, but this time it's absolutely destroying me. I have my lunch shake around 1.00pm and by about 5pm my stomach is churning and uncomfortable, and then it's just a bad time for me and everyone in the house until the next day. The smell is honestly unlike anything I've smelt before 😅
I know an adjustment period is needed, especially as I ate like crap beforehand, including getting no fibre really. I really like Huel though: it's already started helping me lose weight, and having spent all that money on it I'm slightly concerned that I won't be able to use it because the stomach issues are so bad.
How long do they tend to take to go away for most people? And how likely is it that I'm just incompatible with Huel?
I'm going to drop to one shake for breakfast (with 2 Bean Assist capsules to help) and see how that changes things. Is it worth doing that for a week or longer before reintroducing another at lunch?
Any words of wisdom are appreciated as I really don't want to have to stop using it!

I am 30f and live alone, never had a real relationship, addicted to masturbation and fantasy, obese, mentally and chronically ill, and autistic. I struggle making ends meet and have a dead-end job in customer service. I want to better myself but because of my chronic autoimmune issues I never feel well enough to balance both work and school because working full time takes so much out of me. I sleep in until it is time to roll out of bed and get read for work. I have no energy or drive to do anything for myself. All I do is jerk off and think about sex and wish I was married.
My family is mad at me. Men are repulsed by me. I can't make friends or keep them. Yes, I am in counselling and have a long way to go before I can be a person who people want to get to know. But right now I feel like the most worthless piece of excrement. I go on Facebook and see all my old friends and acquittances sharing pregnancy announcements, engagement pictures, wedding photos, baby bump photos, sonogram pictures and feel the most painful jealousy knowing that will never be me because I am not likeable.
There is something about me that turns people off, both men and women. I can sit in a group full of people talking and no one ever engages me or looks at me. When I try to speak up or throw something in the conversation people ignore me or act like they didn't hear me. I feel invisible among people and it is the most painful feeling. I don't know what it is about me but people just don't respond well to me. I think it is my anti-social personality, but what they don't know is I am anti-social for a reason because I have been hurt by people very much in the past and don't want to be hurt again.
I was sexually harassed by a professional last year and threatened to take my review down of the BBB or else they would take me to court and sue me for libel. They did not believe my story and I never felt so invalidated and violated in my life. Men are attracted to me at first and want "me", but that is about it. No one wants to love me or know me. I could go to any bar in town and find someone to sleep with tonight--but that is where it ends. I feel empty and like a husk people just use or want to play with to suit their needs. It makes me feel absolutely worthless.
I am obese and use food to escape from loneliness. It is the only comfort I have.
I can't afford the things I need. I can't drive and never got my driver's license due to illness in the family after I get my permit and never had anyone who had time to teach me. I can't afford to see the endocrinologist which I have been needing to for a long time for my pituitary tumor that I was diagnosed with in 2015. I have not been on medication for it in years and it's probably grown and my periods are extremely heavy and I am growing facial hair now (which makes me feel disgusting and unfeminine). I haven't been to the dentist in years and went this year after I got my tax refund and found out I need over $10,000 in dental work my workplace insurance can't cover. So I have teeth rotting out of my head and a tumor in my head that is wrecking havoc on my hormones.
I feel like a waste of space and life. There are children dying of cancer who deserve the air I am breathing more. There are mothers who have children who deserve the air I am breathing more. There are people who have purpose and lives to lead who deserve the air I am breathing more. I ask myself, why did God create someone like me if He knew this is all I would ever amount to be? I am sure even He is repulsed by me as well.
I feel dirty, cast out, unwanted, disgusting, un-likeable and useless. I feel like at this point I am just waiting to die. The only thing that is keeping me wanting to stay is my cat who depends on me.

I am a huge arachnaphobe, to the point I have once slepted on the couch because a spider was next to my bed. But I don't want to rant for too long because I see how long no sleep stories can be.
My brother invited me to a camping trip in a cabin in the middle of the fucking woods. I watch and read a lot of horror media, my favorite being mrballen (not sponsored). I brought along my other friend I will call Fred for this story. So me, my brother, and Fred all went camping for 5 days, but it was cut short after 2.
When we got to the cabin, I had an off feeling, and that should have been the main sign to get the fuck out of there. I told them about the bad feeling but they pressured me to stay because my brother paid for it and it would be fine. I didn't want to be rude so I stayed, BIG FUCKING MISTAKE.
I soon as I settled in the room, there was a nickel sized spider on the wall. I am too scared to kill spiders ever so I just avoided it at all costs. The rest of the day went without incident. We went for a walk, made a fire, other camping stuff, etc. The next day gave more signs I should have left.
When I woke up there were 3 quarter sized spiders on the window, but not on the inside thankfully. There was also periodically a scurrying in the walls, but I just brushed it off and continued the trip. Again, big mistake.
The next morning, I woke up at 3am to a scream. I walk out of the room to see my brother looking at something. Before I explain what he was looking at, the room we slept in was at the end of a hall that led to a living room, and my brother was at the end of this hallway, and I couldn't see what he was looking at. I walk down the hallway to see what was going on.
"Hey, why'd you scream? What's going on?"
"Look"
I turn the corner and there is the biggest fucking spider I have ever seen. This thing was not just like a huntsman spider, it was the size of a fucking person, and I know, because it was right next to a cocooned person, Fred. This thing looked like a huntsman spider, with a hairy body and legs. It was still, but it was alive because it was laying EGGS, this will be important, and it was laying like 1 per second, and they didn't look like regular spider eggs, more like snake or bird eggs.
I couldn't move, I felt as if it had stuck me to the floor. But what really got me and my brother going, was the eggs hatching. 3 off the eggs starting hatching, letting out 3 quarter sized spiders, just like the ones on the window. We watched as the spiders, over the course of 5 minutes, turn from quarter sized, to huntsman spider size. Then multiple of eggs started hatching, and we also realized that there were like 50 other eggs already hatched.
My senses came back to me as I grabbed my brother and we rushed back to the room, because the spider was right next to the door, so we would have to go out by window. We started grabbing our things and getting ready to leave, as we see that the windows are covered in spiders, each one having like 20 mini spiders and 1 huntsman spider. The windows were now off limits. I could hear lots of scattering all around the cabin, meaning they had covered the area. I walked back into the living room to see if there were any other way to get out, but I made a horrifying discovery.
There were 3 more of the human sized spiders and multiple huntsman sized spiders. I noped the fuck out back to the room and my brother has a plan. He will throw his suitcase out the window and jump out of it, and then I will jump out after him. After some preparing and praying, we were ready. He through the suitcase at the window with all his might, shattering the glass, sending the spiders flying. He jumps out, followed by me. Luckily, no spiders got onto either of us. I turn around and flash a light onto the house to find the outside is absolutely covered in spiders, and a few of the human sized ones.
I immediately started calling 911, but I stopped when multiple trucks and helicopters appeared. The whole house is light on fire, killing all of the spiders. Two dudes in suits brought us to a truck and used this weird divice to scan us and all he said was "All good". I still do not know what the fuck that was supposed to mean, what if I wasn't good!?!
After a bit of sitting there watching the cabin burn down, the same dudes came over with two suitcases that was 1 million dollars in each suit case. They gave them to use and a contract that stated to never tell anyone about what happened that night or there would be consequences.
We don't know who they were, what they were doing, why they took care of the spiders, I am still so confused. My theory is that this is the government or a secret corporation experimenting on spiders and other animals and this fast growing spider escapes the lab and they tracked them down. Thank God we escaped because if we didn't escape in time, they would have burnt the cabin down with us in it.
I told them about Fred and how he had been cocooned, and they said they would take care of it. The next day, it was announced he had died after falling of a cliff. We went with it in fear of the consequences.
The only reason I am telling this is because I just have to let this of my chest and I just have to pray that they don't see this.
Although I have gained a million dollars, I have lost a good friend, and now have severe trauma. Stay safe in Massachusetts, and listen to your bad feelings.

I am a 17F and my entire life I’ve lived together with my married parents. My mom’s childhood was pretty bad as her mother left her at a young age and she lived with her dad who molested her (he died ab 10 yrs ago). She was an only child, same as me and it makes sense to her very introverted personality. She does not work, had 1 job for a few months during my life time. She leaves the house once a week to get groceries and that’s it. She dosent talk to any of her family and dislikes my dad’s family. My parents never really had much chemistry to begin with, there very much opposite. As a child, I realized my parents were different than other parents. My parents haven’t slept in the same bedroom since I was a baby, as long as i’ve been alive they’ve never been on a date, and generally just no romance at all. I remember good and bad memories with my mother. I remember going roller skating with her in my driveway, and us going to the mall together, and very constant arguing. Into my early teens I started to really feel distant from my mother. I realized that we just didn’t get along at all at a young age and in order to keep myself happier I must avoid her. I reflected on all the things she’s said to me and how they affected me. I remember when we went shopping at justice in the mall and how she’d criticize my body. I was told my body wasn’t good enough for a bikini or any cropped clothes but it’s okay because I will “thin out” when i’m older. All the times she picked on my body or pointed out that she weighed more than me started affecting me. The combination of that lead me into my own eating problems and in that time period I lost weight. My mom would always tell me how skinny I was. One day she yelled at me and threatened to take me to a mental hospital if i didn’t “stop” and then congratulated me for my weight loss the next week after a doctors appointment. At a young age I found out that my mom has bulimia and has been taking laxatives for years now. I also started noticing my mom’s drinking habits. She would change into an entirely different person when drunk, even the tone of her voice would change. She did reckless things when drunk. A key memory I have is all the times my mom snuck out and my dad wakes me up in the middle of the night, “your mom’s gone.” This meant she was out cheating on my dad. My dad caught her sneaking out with lingrie in her bag. She met the guy she cheated on my dad at my friends moms house in 4th grade. There were years of this, then my dad smashing her phone and it would happen again. My mom would lie a lot about it as well. There were many times where she went out in the middle of the night to get beer, comes back with a damaged car or hit the garage etc etc. My mom got into a drunk car accident with me when i was a baby under 1yr old. My dad saw the jack daniels in her car, took me while my mom stayed with her dad in the hospital. The police had been involved with my parents once. They got in a fight over windows and my mom punched herself and blamed it on him. I honestly didn’t believe it until i saw that he recorded her, wasted punching herself. One time, when i was 9 my mom asked me if she wanted my parents to get a divorce, i said yes, so she locked herself in the bathroom with a knife and a rag. This leads me into my fear that she is going to hurt herself. There will be someday I moved out and I won’t be there to see that she’s okay at all times. For anyone wondering I am okay and have been in therapy. My mom has been in therapy because she is on meds for her panic attack disorder. She dosent tell the doctor this and hides it. My dad admits that he kept taking my mom back because he feels bad. I honestly just want my mom to tell me she dosent love me so i can not have sympathy for her

Hi so I hooked up with someone a week and a a half ago. We had unprotected sex and we did it for like 15-20 mins. He didn’t ejaculated so there was no sperm but I am terrified of precum mostly. I’m on the pills and I take them very good and on time but I am still paranoid. Since i’m on the pill my period are irregular and come like every other month. Im supposed to start thursday or friday and i’ve felt fine besides breast tenderness and being gassy but if anyone has comments to ease my mind or advice , i would love it.

Hihi! I’m desu! To jump into the meat of it, here’s a few things about me and what I’m looking for!
All characters and writers 18+! No exceptions!

• I have weird schedule! I work nights! Yes, a super weird one. Most of my downtime to write is scattered throughout the entire 24 hours of the day. I work nights so on good nights I can write a LOT. My next big open slot is in the mornings (7-10am Central American time), one small slot in the afternoon (3-5pm Central American time), as well as the entirety of 10:30pm-6:30am central if work is merciful.
  
• I also have a busy life! That doesn’t mean I won’t put my best foot forward to reply to you though! I love ooc chit chats and banter. I’ll quickly reply ooc even if I have no time to reply to a big big post. I have two kids, a spouse and a full time job. Sometimes it’s hard. Also, I rarely write on the weekends!
  
• Fandoms & OC’s only! As much as I really enjoy the thought of world building, I don’t have a whole lot of bandwidth set side for it. Would I do a pure homebrew? Maybe. You would have to have a lot of it set in stone so I could lean on it. It takes a lot for my to work myself up and write into one.
  
• Lit to Novella! I write big hunky blocks of stuff! I write anywhere from 2 paragraphs to the message limit. My average is about 4 good sized paragraphs. This is something I will not compromise on!
  
• Comfortable playing any role/gender! Male? Female? Villain? Good guy? Anti-hero? I’m down as long as there is a basis to the plot and a story or goal to follow! My password is citrus for the messages in my DM’s!
  
• Topics and settings? Sure! I enjoy them all! My weakness is high fantasy so things like Fire Emblem, TES, and other styles of fandoms are my favorites. I love high fantasy and similar settings of any kind. I’ll almost never turn down a chance to write though. Romance, sci-fi, modern, historical, anything. High fantasy is definitely my favorite but I’ll try anything with anyone once.
  

So, for fandoms, some I'm comfortable completely leading a campaign in and others I would need varying levels of help.

• The fandoms I really want are Fire Emblem 3H, Naruto, Frieren, and The Elder Scrolls, that being said they are not the only things I'll write! I'm open to the vast majority of fandoms! Home brew? Not that much.
  
• Fandom's I'm comfortable taking the entire lead in if needed: World of Warcraft, FFXIV, New World, Pokemon, V Rising/Generic Vampire RP, Avatar the Last Airbender (pref. for Korra time period over Aang), Demon Slayer
  
• Fandom's I'm interested and mildly experienced in but would need a little help with crafting a story: Bleach, Soul Eater, Jujutsu Kaisen, Monster Hunter, Soul Caliber, Conan the Barbarian/Conan Exiles, Black Desert Online
  

Prompts: My stories aren't limited to these. These few prompts are just to express and show some basic ideas we could use as a foundation! Mind you, these are just a few. I'm down for any topic in any fandom. 🙂
TES V: A forbidden romance! A nord noble hailing from Windhelm or a surrounding township within the territory falls for a Dunmer of sorts. They could be a lifetime friend or maybe a new servant within his hold's ranks! The genders of each are interchangeable. The topics could range from romance, politics, actions, thriller and much more! Forbidden romances in general are one of my favorites!
TES, any timeline: I've really been wanting to explore a super toxic relationship between a vampire and a werewolf. Ideally, the vampire is older and more ancient. She has the Noxiphilic Sanguivoria strain, mostly for convenience, but is beyond well fed and mostly hunts for the sport. It would be an insanely long term and slow burn romance featuring very dark topics like stockholm syndrome, brainwashing and other scary things! A lot of these I prefer to discuss in DM's due to the nature of them.
FE3H: Another forbidden romance! Perhaps a noble and a commoner? Or two female nobles? Either way, the OC's relationships wouldn't be the expectation of a traditional powerful couple. Whether it's giving up on the opportunity to marry up or into power by a noble marrying a commoner or giving up on the idea of the bloodline continuing with a same sex couple, it's highly shunned and frowned upon. FE3H is one of my favorite worlds for FE and I really adore the idea of playing in it.
Naruto: I've done stories where we write through different missions and domestic scenes as growing ninja. The stories start at the genin and chuunin level and go all the way up to jonin and full blown adulthood. I'm very okay with AU/lots of lorebending for this. Want to be a jinchuuriki post 4th war? Sure! A surviving uchiha or someone that looted a sharingan by some means? Also great! The world is vast and wide and it lends itself to sooooo many topics and ideas and the power system is super easy to wrap your head around. It's one of my favorites for that reason.
Frieren: This world is like FE3H! It's the most stereotypical and fabulous high fantasy where the stories make the setting! I adore it so much. I'm so willing to write through any topic or subject with OC's in this world. Everything is so cute and sweet and has so many chances to go every which way.

Hihi! I’m desu! To jump into the meat of it, here’s a few things about me and what I’m looking for!
All characters and writers 18+! No exceptions!

• I have weird schedule! I work nights! Yes, a super weird one. Most of my downtime to write is scattered throughout the entire 24 hours of the day. I work nights so on good nights I can write a LOT. My next big open slot is in the mornings (7-10am Central American time), one small slot in the afternoon (3-5pm Central American time), as well as the entirety of 10:30pm-6:30am central if work is merciful.
  
• I also have a busy life! That doesn’t mean I won’t put my best foot forward to reply to you though! I love ooc chit chats and banter. I’ll quickly reply ooc even if I have no time to reply to a big big post. I have two kids, a spouse and a full time job. Sometimes it’s hard. Also, I rarely write on the weekends!
  
• Fandoms & OC’s only! As much as I really enjoy the thought of world building, I don’t have a whole lot of bandwidth set side for it. Would I do a pure homebrew? Maybe. You would have to have a lot of it set in stone so I could lean on it. It takes a lot for my to work myself up and write into one.
  
• Lit to Novella! I write big hunky blocks of stuff! I write anywhere from 2 paragraphs to the message limit. My average is about 4 good sized paragraphs. This is something I will not compromise on!
  
• Comfortable playing any role/gender! Male? Female? Villain? Good guy? Anti-hero? I’m down as long as there is a basis to the plot and a story or goal to follow! My password is citrus for the messages in my DM’s!
  
• Topics and settings? Sure! I enjoy them all! My weakness is high fantasy so things like Fire Emblem, TES, and other styles of fandoms are my favorites. I love high fantasy and similar settings of any kind. I’ll almost never turn down a chance to write though. Romance, sci-fi, modern, historical, anything. High fantasy is definitely my favorite but I’ll try anything with anyone once.
  

So, for fandoms, some I'm comfortable completely leading a campaign in and others I would need varying levels of help.

• The fandoms I really want are Fire Emblem 3H, Naruto, Frieren, and The Elder Scrolls, that being said they are not the only things I'll write! I'm open to the vast majority of fandoms! Home brew? Not that much.
  
• Fandom's I'm comfortable taking the entire lead in if needed: World of Warcraft, FFXIV, New World, Pokemon, V Rising/Generic Vampire RP, Avatar the Last Airbender (pref. for Korra time period over Aang), Demon Slayer
  
• Fandom's I'm interested and mildly experienced in but would need a little help with crafting a story: Bleach, Soul Eater, Jujutsu Kaisen, Monster Hunter, Soul Caliber, Conan the Barbarian/Conan Exiles, Black Desert Online
  

Prompts: My stories aren't limited to these. These few prompts are just to express and show some basic ideas we could use as a foundation! Mind you, these are just a few. I'm down for any topic in any fandom. 🙂
TES V: A forbidden romance! A nord noble hailing from Windhelm or a surrounding township within the territory falls for a Dunmer of sorts. They could be a lifetime friend or maybe a new servant within his hold's ranks! The genders of each are interchangeable. The topics could range from romance, politics, actions, thriller and much more! Forbidden romances in general are one of my favorites!
TES, any timeline: I've really been wanting to explore a super toxic relationship between a vampire and a werewolf. Ideally, the vampire is older and more ancient. She has the Noxiphilic Sanguivoria strain, mostly for convenience, but is beyond well fed and mostly hunts for the sport. It would be an insanely long term and slow burn romance featuring very dark topics like stockholm syndrome, brainwashing and other scary things! A lot of these I prefer to discuss in DM's due to the nature of them.
FE3H: Another forbidden romance! Perhaps a noble and a commoner? Or two female nobles? Either way, the OC's relationships wouldn't be the expectation of a traditional powerful couple. Whether it's giving up on the opportunity to marry up or into power by a noble marrying a commoner or giving up on the idea of the bloodline continuing with a same sex couple, it's highly shunned and frowned upon. FE3H is one of my favorite worlds for FE and I really adore the idea of playing in it.
Naruto: I've done stories where we write through different missions and domestic scenes as growing ninja. The stories start at the genin and chuunin level and go all the way up to jonin and full blown adulthood. I'm very okay with AU/lots of lorebending for this. Want to be a jinchuuriki post 4th war? Sure! A surviving uchiha or someone that looted a sharingan by some means? Also great! The world is vast and wide and it lends itself to sooooo many topics and ideas and the power system is super easy to wrap your head around. It's one of my favorites for that reason.
Frieren: This world is like FE3H! It's the most stereotypical and fabulous high fantasy where the stories make the setting! I adore it so much. I'm so willing to write through any topic or subject with OC's in this world. Everything is so cute and sweet and has so many chances to go every which way.

TL/DR: when I spend too much time alone, I get kind of feral. Currently not seeing anyone else because of "fairness," and efforts to make friends over the past year have not worked. The feral is going to negatively impact my relationship, but my partner adding more people onto their plate will also negatively impact my relationship.
By feral, I mean that I become really touch adverse, feel completely drained being around someone else regardless of affection for them, and honestly don't care a lick about how I look, what weird noises I make, and forget not to talk to myself out loud.
Before getting too far into this, I have gone through several long periods of my life where I had no friends outside of work and experience no familiar (even platonic) touch. I don't actually mind it, but I get a little feral and with a partner who extremely values the love language of touch, this can be hard to navigate.
Everything I mention regarding friends is for in-person friends only. I can take an abundance of time to spend with friends on the phone or online.
Currently, I only have one partner. We are deeply enmeshed, but long distance, and they are now in full care of their young children.
They've been separated from their ex for years, but are finally going through a formal divorce and it's one of the ugliest I've seen or heard of.
We agreed not to see others because we weren't really seeing anyone else at the start of this, and they've got extremely limited time. For me, I moved somewhere new and dating is expensive (let alone making friends). For them, they moved and got a full time job and currently are a full time parent. We have plans to move in together, but that's still a ways off. Year, maybe two in the future.
I wanted to be equitable, because I'm the one who wasn't thrilled at the idea of them seeing other people when they barely have time for me. We're talking maybe an hour on the phone a day, and one long distance date night in the last two months. We had plans to see each other once a month, but they now are in full custody of their kids and my job kind of has me locked down for the next few months myself. They're coming to visit me soon but no idea when we'll see each other after that.
I'm getting kind of concerned with the amount of time I'm spending alone. I really see a future with them and know this is just going to be a rough year or two but it's rough. I've tried making friends, but I'm in a HCOL area on a pretty LCOL budget. Most of my hobbies don't exist here either. So in short, I don't even know how to make friends outside of online dating.
Is it fair to bring up that I would like to date, but don't want to be with them if they're going to further lessen time spent with me by seeing other people?
Do I just be fair and suck it up and accept they'll virtually have no time for me because they'll have other partners? But at least I'll be able to see other people?
Do I just accept the fact that I'm going to be really really alone for a while?
I've been kind of running through my options and wanted to get input. I have virtually no human time outside of work (where I have work friends, but it's not the same as being myself or with people experiencing friendly touch). The idea of being around someone and having familiar touch makes my skin crawl a little. Like I'm going to struggle with the idea of seeing them just because I haven't had to share space or spend time with anyone else like that in so long. I also get extremely touch adverse after too long of not having to experience that sensory input.
I've looked at meetup groups and have no interest in anything local. The nearest local places for my hobbies are like 2 hours away, which is too far. On one hand, I adapt really well to being alone all the time. On the other hand, this probably overall is going to negatively impact my relationship.

If you're considering the keto diet for weight loss, here are some tips to help you get started and stay on track:

1. Understand Keto Basics: The ketogenic diet focuses on high fat, moderate protein, and very low carbohydrate intake. Typically, you’ll aim for 70-75% of your calories from fat, 20-25% from protein, and 5-10% from carbs.
2. Plan Your Meals: Meal planning is crucial on keto. Stock up on keto-friendly foods like avocados, eggs, fatty fish, meat, cheese, nuts, and low-carb vegetables (e.g., spinach, kale, broccoli).
3. Stay Hydrated: Drink plenty of water. The keto diet can have a diuretic effect, so it’s important to stay hydrated and replenish electrolytes. Consider adding a pinch of salt to your water or drinking broth.
4. Monitor Your Carb Intake: Keep your daily carb intake under 20-50 grams to enter and maintain ketosis. Use apps or food diaries to track your carb consumption accurately.
5. Include Healthy Fats: Focus on healthy fats such as olive oil, coconut oil, avocados, and nuts. Avoid trans fats and highly processed oils.
6. Watch for Hidden Carbs: Be aware of hidden carbs in foods like sauces, dressings, and certain dairy products. Always check labels and ingredient lists.
7. Electrolyte Balance: Ensure you get enough sodium, potassium, and magnesium to avoid the “keto flu” (symptoms like headache, fatigue, and irritability). Incorporate foods rich in these electrolytes or take supplements if necessary.
8. Listen to Your Body: Pay attention to how your body responds to the diet. Some may experience a period of adjustment, known as the keto flu, but it usually passes in a few days.
9. Exercise Regularly: Combine the keto diet with regular physical activity. Both resistance training and cardio can enhance your weight loss and improve overall health.
10. Stay Consistent: Consistency is key to achieving and maintaining ketosis. Avoid cheat days as they can knock you out of ketosis and set back your progress.
11. Educate Yourself: Read up on keto and join keto communities for support and recipe ideas. There’s a wealth of information out there to help you succeed.
12. Consult a Professional: Before starting the keto diet, it’s a good idea to consult with a healthcare provider, especially if you have underlying health conditions.

Remember, the keto diet is a significant change from typical eating habits, so give yourself time to adapt. Stay patient, stay informed, and you’ll see the benefits in no time!
Good luck, and feel free to share your own tips or ask questions below!

mine my latest dream

I had a very vivid dream that I was in a partially wrecked building, weapons and gear were stored and we were suffering bombardment from small explosive rounds.
I geared up with a rocket launcher and went to the front; from a distance I could see dark figures firing at us they seemed middle eastern but the appearance seemed just that, an appearance. Their energy connected to a central source and the feeling I got was they were connected to the elite .
I shot off a few rounds with the launcher and then started launching some kind of bladed projectile which I envisioned impaling several of the offenders; I was running out of ammo and reached for the small nuclear warheads at which point the enemy dispersed. They were too close to fire on for it to have spared our lives.
My vision then shifted to a battle of two skys
the upper sky which I felt was the creator or god was sending massive energy pulses to the lower sky, I observed from between them and after around ten bursts I was asked if it had removed the cold from the earth, I answered yes, it had.

that one was a trip.
sis/ rip

Another dire warning in dream state
Last night as usual in my dream state I wandered into an area which was full of underlying religious context I was fighting the unseen dark influences and warding off demonic possession by repeating over and over the lords prayer, while surrounded by all the evils of the world, but very curiously I never got passed “thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven,” until about the fifth time of chanting, for those of you who are unfamiliar with this prayer it is as follows.
Our father which art in heaven Hallowed be thy name
Thy kingdom come thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven
Give us this day our daily bread forgive us our trespasses
As we forgive those who trespass against us
Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil
For thine is the power and the glory forever and ever
Amen.
After then I awoke abruptly at “give us this day our daily bread forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”
This to me meant that we are about to be forced into a time when this prophecy called the book of revelations is about to become a reality meaning Gods will is upon us, and God is at hand in the works of the people and in these the last days this prayer to me is all about humbly thanking God for every small blessing and asking for his help and guidance in every aspect of our lives great and small but keeping humble requests and having gratitude for anything more that he bestows on our lives and so this is the message I send out to you for now is the time of repentance.
BE WARNED, and be READY!
I may seem to you to be a bible thumping quack don’t say you were not forewarned in the end when you come face to face with your own judgments in the presence of your maker you have 2 and 1/2 years before you will see for yourself that sooner was most definitely better than later in this case all hell is about to break lose and later is just too late!
In that same dream I had a personal warning that a man and woman would enter my life asking for a personal favor and as I submitted to their request in the end I was betrayed and left in utter disarray in my life possibly facing legal hardship from them. //
Are we headed for drought and famine?
How many years has it been since we as a society believed the end was eminant? Since the great depression? since world war1, or worldwar2? and each time we are very pleasantly and ecstaticly relieved when the end is never in sight, and each time we feel foolish don’t we? What if all of that were to change, would we see it or know it? Maybe there is that one person who told us it was coming and we disregarded their words as the rantings of a mentally ill person You never truly know it is over until you are facing the ugliness of those final moments but we can all agree that we as a whole are working up to it each and every generation and we can feel our own mortality as we slip into unknown territory full of terrorism and nuclear bomb threaghts. What if the answer was as simple as finding our footing in the spiritual realm becoming more harmonious with the earth and with human beings around us in other words what if their were a guarantee that if we prayed or at least became spiritually aware we would be saved? would we do this very simple task, would others around us follow our lead? What if I told you all it takes to save the town you’re in is 20 people who were connected in mind and soul to the what society calls THE GODHEAD? I had a dream a few nights ago where I stood in a foreign country I felt it was europe and many different people were around with accents that to me seemed as though they were from multiple tongues and nations and they were mulling around and drinking and living just everyday lives full of materialism and wickedness in other words what has become the norm all around the world and in the midst of them I was trying to tell them of an impending event that was about to happen that they needed to prepare for. But to no avail I was completely ignored by all still I kept trying telling them there was going to be a great drought and a food shortage that would effect the whole world and would move from country to country like a great domino effect but it seemed as though even upon hearing numerous lives would be lost they continued in their faithful disobedience over and over I repeated myself and it seemed to me they were in great disbelief that this was at all possible and in the end of the dream I finally said God has told me to tell you their will be a great drought and famine and that if you do not want your countries to fall into starvation you should prepare for it then I awoke. When I woke up I was in shock for God was never in my dream, and not once have I spoken with him personally and yet still it felt as though I had the authority to say these exact words that they were ordained directly from God! A few days later I had yet another dream I was in a place after the bombs settled and saw the oceans and seas the land had radiation through out and the water was greatly poisoned by this radiation and the sharks and fish were changing over a period of time I saw multiple generations of grotesquely mutated life and was in great fear then I saw multiple babies being created in a scientific way in order to carry on the human lineage and a very dark in nature group moving to seek out and destroy these babies that were close to reaching full gestation, I had the distinct feeling we humans were becoming less and less able to procreate in the conventienal way. And lastnight I dreamt I was traveling accrossed the sea, in specific the medateranian sea having a very beautiful feeling great things were going to happen when I came accrossed a small family that seemed very important for some reason, they lived in a very small area in simple surroundings and their was a birthday taking place it was the 5th or 6th birthday of a boy I felt I needed to attend the birthday of, and they were happy to see me allowing my prescence with open arms, but when I wanted to bring others they weren’t very accomodating feeling towards the Idea when I awoke I felt as though that young boy was very important somehow to a significant event that will take place futuristically. At first I wasn’t sure the significance of the information I am about to disclose but I decided that it just may be pertinent, I was definately in an area that boating seemed a pass time and my brain hit on Ionian sea and the young boy was in a sea cavern with smoke coming from his ears as his parents did also, it was an area where Manta Rays were most prevalent, along with a moderate amount of dolphins near by very few deadly sharks in comparrison to the other aquatic life and an occassional whale perhaps this boy is not an actual boy but a smaller volcano alongside two larger ones, whic is why I saw smoke coming from the ears meaning it was about to come to an eruptive head, in which the boys age was five maybe perhaps pin pointing the time it is to going to erupt. There are alot of different meanings we can take from this dream. //
Do we really think we are safe?
What happens if America is right in the fact that President Obama is the fated Anti-Christ? What then? Is there anything we can truly do about it? At best this proves the struggle between good and evil does exists and there is a God, a messiah, and A Lucifer (devil), or Satan however you were raised to call him. Ok now imagine we can stop him from his achieving full power, just pretend somehow we could, or that we do and off sounds the trumpet? Christians save the day yeehaa yippy kiyay Do we think for an instant oh the struggle is over whew, we can finally breathe easy, boy that was close, I’m so glad we passed the test, ding dong the witch is dead! Or do we wait for the next Anti-Christ, and the next, and the next, how many times can we thwart his full power inevitably he will rise in the end no matter how hard we fight to keep him away right? So why not let him come and turn over in the end the rule of the earth to the second coming of our messiah, the lord of lords, and king of kings Are we that afraid of facing God Almighty? Understandably we are all afraid we are not in the book of life,for only the sainted, and virginal, and truly Godly are written in the book of life those, who are hand picked from the start by God himself to exist the last days before the second coming, only the handicapped, truly compassionate right? Well guess how many of us that describes, not me and if you are able to read and understand this not you probably, oh just because there are priests and bishops and preachers and popes in the world most likely non of them qualify, and our Jewish population I’m pretty certain absolutely none of them are in the book of life! After all the Jews needlessly slaughtered the saints and their own King to boot if anything the Jews should rue the day they ever meet wit their maker! Mayhap it’s better to allow this time to pass and hope that gods mercy be upon us or even do one better change our greedy, hateful, unforgiving ways, pray constantly for direction and guidance, repent, and seek counsel in the holy ghost, and give whole heartedly our penance to the lord our lamb, to present a case on our behalf to the almighty heavenly father this is the only way we can be of light heart, and easy mind and maybe find worthiness in Gods eyes, then let the Antichrist come as we Christians ban together to survive in the latter days in other words prepare for the worst and hope for the best. If God finds us worthy worst case scenario we are killed right away or perhaps we are not bothered at all because we have repented, remember that to repent is to ask forgiveness with a broken heart, and humble nature never to do what we are repenting of again! This may sound hard and maybe we are all waiting for definitive proof of Gods existence before we do this but seriously it will be too late the tribulation for you will be too great and you most likely need to take the side that gives you instantaneous relief from your misery.
We know who will rise victoriously why not allow it? And in the end all of the secrets and deceptions that were created will be revealed and all of our own perversions of the true church will be done away with I say let it come about, Let the saints finally taste revenge for all that man has spoiled, perverted, and destroyed, and let god fill his cup with the grapes of wrath. //
Governmental knockdown?
This last dream I’m very uncertain if it was tied into anything or not but warned of a big fight between two male entities that one of which was very large in stature and appeared to me like the archangel Michael who I felt was my fiercest and personal protector he seemed very close spiritually to me I’m not sure why but the warring was going on with a very dark and much smaller male figure and completely evil it was very disturbing as I saw a great blow to the head taken by Michael but only after he delivered one to his foe which was not very damaging, and Michael who was standing in front of me in position and mind to protect me, fell to the ground but I waited around to see whether he raised again and I remember thinking it was impossible for him to be dead so I stayed and kept waiting for his rising thinking it would be any second then I awoke was it real if so what does it mean? Is it a possibility God will allow Satan and his dominion such power over even his own archangels to be defeated for a short time and leave his children completely at the mercy of the devil? In the dream I remember feeling vulnerable to the will of the dark force before me but also strangely feeling as though I wasn’t going to be gone after as I stayed vigilant in my loyalty to my protector bidding his rising fervently and in complete disbelief that he was dead.
Upon further reflection of this dream I came to the possible conclusion that the male entities were symbolic of the government we could all depend on protecting us and the smaller figure was a darker change in our government infrastructure knocking down our protective defenses and leaving our government vulnerable to darker government influences which intended the country harm. And that if we stay loyal and vigil we can avoid the harmful effects and changes about to be a possible driving force in our country.

https://web.archive.org/web/20100823131345/http://theruthlesstruth.com/wordpress/
the rest under pages starting at the rambling poet most are my late sisters

Obligatory English is not my first language and writing this on Mobile notice. Warning reproductive system is involved in not so flattering ways. Don't read if rancid things make you feel nausea. Also don't read if you get mad easily, unless you're into that then you do you bubu.
Medical terms and definitions some people might not know:
Ovarian cyst- when an ovum decides it doesn't want to go down the fallopian tube and be a total jerk by hanging out in your ovary and suck up nutrients to grow indefinitely or until it pops creating the same pain as if a cyst popped inside testicles.
PCOS- condition that makes you have said ovarian cysts but for some reasons multiplied times too many. One ovary can easily have 8 cysts so imagine when both ovaries have it.
Dermoid Cyst- same as ovarian cyst but the composition is actually made of hair, teeth, bones, skin, etc. it's really gross to look at.
Struma Ovarii- an extremely rare type of dermoid cyst who's composition is mainly thyroid tissue. It makes up only .5% of dermoid cysts.
Ovarian torsion- when your ovary twists on itself or with the fallopian tube, often times cutting off blood supply if not caught on time.
Sepsis- when a part of your body starts to decay and releases chemicals into your body causing life threatening shock that need immediate medical treatment. Most can recover from it but takes a long time to recover, sometimes years.
Cystectomy- surgery that removes cyst(s)
Ooftarectomy- surgery that removes ovary
Bilateral- both sides
Hey everyone from the Two Hot Takes team, hope you're all doing well and have your seatbelts buckled in as this is one heck of a medical story doozy.
Back story: I had always suffered PCOS. The irregular yet heavy periods, the extra hair, and the multiple cysts. The problem was that I was a teen and apparently PCOS is not a big deal if it's on a teenager. It's also not a big deal if it's on a young adult that doubles over in pain from periods and wears overnight pads that need to be changed every 4 hours because thats not heavy enough to be of concern. Sometimes even doubling over on times when there is no period because those are just the cysts popping. I always did my pap smears and always went to the gyno, fully trusting them that what I had was not note worthy. So whenever I moved and got a new gyno, while it was mentioned nothing was done about it and I had assumed that was the norm.
It all started in October of 2023 when I felt a sharp pain in my right lower hip while I was at work. At that time I worked for a hospital as a host and only been working for a few months so thank goodness that I had access to the ER. Unfortunately for me my work place is a small hospital so there aren't any gyno nor obs. So the ER doctor just ordered an ultrasound and a trans-vaginal ultrasound (where they stick a dildo shaped ultrasound tool inside of you), and a CT scan without contrast due to iodine allergy. They initially said that due to the pain level I must be having appendicitis. However they instead found a 9cm (for reference a grapefruit is 10cm) cyst on the left ovary and a 4cm (walnut sized) cyst on the right. They said that while they are big and need to be removed, that a specialist needs to write the recommendation to do the surgery and that since our hospital didn't have any that I'll have to get an appointment with a gyno outside of the hospital. He prescribed me 500mg of ibuprofen and told me that I'm discharged. This was the first bs hospital policy of many that I will encounter in this roller coaster.
After getting an appointment with a gyno, I had another incident at work with the same crippling pain. I had the same double vision, nausea and fainting as the first time but this time I had fainted near a patient I was tending to. I didn't get into trouble for that as it was a medical condition that was previously recorded and I had been fine prior on that day. Just my ovaries decided to be jerks on that poor patient to which I apologized heavily to later. Instead my boss wanted answers as to why I was starting to become absent so frequently. I told her about what they found in the ER and how long it takes to get a specialist to see and how my ovaries just want to remind me that going up and down three flights of stairs daily to get to my apartment is making them more irritated.
Appointment time comes and instead of taking the findings for what they are, the gyno then decides to order the same exact tests but within his facility because that's apparently some kind of bs hospital policy that they have to do before giving the ok for a surgery.
I wait for the tests and had more time called off from work. Day of the tests and the ultrasound lady says "you have at least 8 cysts on your right with the biggest one being 7cm (peach sized) and on your left you have a massive one that is 10cm big". I told her "oh so it grew? Is it cancer then?" She calmed me down saying that ovarian cysts do grow as you get more ovulation cycles and that it doesn't mean that it's cancer. However that I most likely have PCOS and that the giant cyst is probably hiding the other cysts if not just merging with the other cysts ony left side. I told her I knew about the PCOS and that her explanation made sense as the dates between the scans had several months in-between since the specialist couldn't see me the day of the incident. (nor even the week of apparently because that's how it goes over here in the USA when it comes to specialists.) She then was surprised and said "I didn't see any PCOS medications on your chart". I told her I had no idea that there was such a thing. She told me not to worry that my new gyno will prescribe me meds.
After the tests, my gyno finally schedules a pre-op appointment, day of surgery and post-op appointment.The surgery would be performed on a second hospital where I don't work in. I arrive at pre-op, doctor tells me the exact same thing that my ultrasound lady said but he mentioned that there's a slight possibility for an ooftarectomy but that we're definitely doing a bilateral cystectomy. He prescribed me Metformin which is for preventing new cysts from forming. I was so happy thinking that I might be able to live a life free from these cursed cysts after the sury. Oh how things were going to turn out.
Turns out the day of the surgery Match 1st was my "6th month anniversary" (it's not I've been working since August of 2023) of working in the hospital. That meant that a new insurance policy was placed and the old one was replaced. I showed up on the day of the surgery and they told me that they couldn't do it because the new insurance wouldn't cover it due to no prior authorization. I had thought that the new insurance wouldn't kick in until my 1 year anniversary or until it was time for enrollment. I cried. I cried right there on the lobby in front of everyone. In front of my family, my boyfriend and coworkers that had woken up at 5 am to be there for moral support on their day off. There's so many hoops just to get treated. My boyfriend said that if a grapefruit sized cyst was on a testicle they would had treated it as an emergency but because it's on an ovary that it isn't.
I had collected myself and immediately scheduled for a new gyno appointment. Unfortunately the appointment was again several months. It was for August 28th. Luckily my cysts decided that was too far off. So I had another incident at work once again. I was rushed to another hospital instead of being discharged thankfully. However that said hospital then sent me away to another hospital because they weren't a "women's hospital" and that women's hospital said that they couldn't do anything without my gynos permission. That the best that they can do is call my gyno and claim that my appointment with her should be expedited but that my situation isn't an emergency. We told them to do what they need to do. At this point not even morphine helped with the pain.
Thankfully my gyno reached out to me stating that she was available to see me that week instead. I was able to see her and she saw that the women's hospital did some tests and the cysts were now 11cm left and 8cm right respectively. She said however that she can't use the tests from the women's hospital, that she had to schedule for the same tests to be done in her facility. I started to cry, again. It was the same dumb policy. I understand that some time had passed but it was only a few days in-between and having these tests won't show anything new other than possibly new growth. She promised that the tests will be scheduled under expedited and that it will be on April 28th. This was on March 26. At least she increased the dosage of the ibuprofen to 800mg so it would take the edge off a bit more.
On March 30 my boyfriend wanted to cheer me up by taking me to see his brother Orlando FL since he was getting married soon. We were supposed to stay there for a few days for the preparations. I had a small ache at the time so thought I just needed to take my ibuprofen and be on my way. My boyfriend noticed I was in pain and asked if I was ok, the pain was small so I said yes. His mother said "maybe we should leave her in the apartment so she can rest" to which my boyfriend said "I don't like that idea, if she can't come I'm not going". I was relieved because I didn't want to be alone if an incident were to happen again. My parents were running out of days to take off to be there in the hospitals (4 different hospitals at this point). The car ride made me sleepy as car sounds remind me of ASMR. It was a long ride but when I woke up we were already in Orlando. The pain had significantly increased. I thought if only I could just take another ibuprofen when we get to my future brother in law's place that I would be good. I.WAS.NOT.
As soon as we arrived nausea took over and I puked from the pain. The abdominal motion made the pain so much worse that I just started to scream in pain. It was so much pain I couldn't think or speak. My boyfriend knew it was the cysts and told everyone that he's going to take me to the ER. There wasn't a second I wasn't screaming in pain with tears running down my face. The hospital he tooke to said that they weren't the women's hospital however they do have a sister hospital that they will take me to called Winnie Palmer's Women's Hospital (I will forever name drop this hospital for what they did to me).
They immediately gave me medications that took the pain away, I was able to have a conversation with the doctors of what has been going on and the long history. They debated amongst themselves on whether or not to do the surgery but they in the mean time did tests while they kept calling my gyno for permission to do the surgery. The specialists in the hospital said that I don't have just regular cysts, I had a dermoid cyst and that my blood tests shows elevated levels of cancer antibodies. So they decided to go against policy and keep me hospitalized until they get permission from my gyno to get the surgery. My gyno finally reached out to them on Monday April 1st and they had me for surgery at 1pm. They found an ovarian torsion on my right size which explains why my right size hurt more than my left at times. Unfortunately the ovary was necrosed same as the fallopian tube, they theorized reason why tests showed "healthy blood flow to the ovary". The first theory was that the ovarian turn kept being undone and turned again. Which if that was the case I would have been dead before any professional would have seen me on April 28th. The second theory was that the type of dermoid I had was a Struma Ovarii which basically acted like a second thyroid glad in my right ovary. So when they saw it on the tests they thought it was my ovary when in reality it was my second thyroid getting blood supply. On the second theory I would have still died because the necrosed ovary would have eventually expanded and exploded. Spreading putrid flesh into my body's cavity on top of bleeding profusely as that would undo the knot, quickly ending my life if medical attention wasn't given immediately. They removed the large cyst on my left ovary alongside another Struma Ovarii. Turns out I hit the lottery of thyroids. They suspect that the antibodies is due to genetics since my family history is riddled with cancer survivors.
I got discharged after the surgery and when it was my April 28th testing appointment it turned into my post-op appointment lol. My gyno saw my stitches and gave me clean bill of health. However the gyno from the other hospital called and wanted to see me. So we traveled all the way to Orlando again. She wanted to see for herself how I was doing and she was concerned that since it was two Struma Ovarii that my body might have been relying on those two thyroids in addition to my OG thyroid to function. So she's worried that I might be having lower levels now. So she ordered to do thyroid test and genetic tests to see if the cancer antibodies theory can be proven.
So now I'm waiting for when I move to NC since my old job could no longer tolerate the absences and my apartment rent got higher while also not having a grace period for me to gather money to break lease. My boyfriend decided that he would quit his CNA job so that he could pull out his 401(k) and help me break off the lease and move in to his apartment in NC while I recover from surgery. I'm so glad he refused to leave me alone and he wasn't afraid to speak for me to doctors to do the surgery while I was drugged up. He's currently applying for CNA positions so that he can get health insurance ASAP and add me to the policy as soon as we get married. In mean time we also wait for thyroid test and genetic tests. Will update after all the testing.

This is a confusing and long situation, so I'll try to be as clear as possible.
Background: I'm a full-time Audio visual technician for an international company, and recently, us techs were told that due to the volatile seasonal nature of our job, that we should apply for part-time unemployment when hours get slow. Around February, I began taking physical therapy for a non-current-work related back pain that is from an injury back in 2018. I mentioned this in closing notes for the day, to explain why a set wasn't fully finished by the time I needed to clock out, so the morning team knew what to finish. My boss told me I needed to provide documentation which then snowballed into the situation I'm in now.
It all came to a head in late March when I gave a doctor's note (that was my PCP and did not feel qualified to Diagnose me with anything, but wrote that I could perform light duty with a weight limitation and gave a date of 4/24/24 so I could go through the proper channels of doctors to get a proper diagnosis)
Come end of March/Early April, the work dried up and I applied for unemployment. It obviously took some time to get started. (also to note, I have an auditory processing disorder, and a mild learning disorder, so phone calls are not my friend, which doesn't help when EDD forces phone interactions with jargon I don't and can't understand)
EDD said there was some issue with my application and that a phone interview was scheduled. EDD never called, so I called them and let them know what was happening, and I mentioned the doctor snafu that was taking place. I now realize that was a bad call in my part.
When hours started coming back, I still wasn't getting any, and was told that my job could not accommodate me for my injury, which was not the case, as another director from a different property found audio operator jobs for me. When it was time to apply for benefits, I put in the box asking if I was too sick or injured to work full time. I put no, because I had a doctor's note that said "light duty" not "cannot return to work until ______" I work in audio visual, and have multiple skills within the field that my main property could have accommodated for but did not, and was almost forced into LOA.
Another phone interview was scheduled due to flagged information. This phone call, I was interrogated, incriminated, set to be willfully giving false information, and that the department would give a decision on my case. Most of the questions I did not fully understand, which was made apparent by the caller's exasperated tone in responding to me, and saying "That's not what I asked" and repeated the questions in the same format.
A few days later, I received the notice that my case was disqualified due to "giving wrong information or withholding information" and said that I cannot receive benefits for 3 years from the disqualification effective date unless it is satisfied at an earlier date. All this is to say, I know one cannot have an open Unemployment and STDI case at the same time, but this first was unemployment and then became SDTI, and now I'm being punished for not understanding the criteria and feeling pressured to answer questions I did not understand due to my disorders. I don't know how to appeal to this, or if that 3 years means I can't claim unemployment in the coming months or years when hours get slim or disappear again, well after this injury issue is over. I am continuing to apply, and just did the last two weeks, now saying "yes" to too injured even though that isn't the case, still making too much (which is fine because that no hour period is over for the moment) and still seeing "disqualified".
I really don't know what to do here.

Kanye ‘Ye’ West is—or was—one of the most important artists of the 21st century. His creativity has no limits and he has proven himself successful in every creative endeavor—mainly, music and fashion. He has one of the best discographies in music history, and despite all of the worrisome public controversies and freak-outs, his legacy will probably never be forgotten.

1. Late Registration 10/10 Such a perfect album. LR is his second release, where he worked with Jon Brion to bring together the hip-hop sound with symphonies and movie-score like instrumentals; sonically, way better and more impressive than College Dropout. The themes are personal and heartwarming—Hey Mama, Roses, Diamonds From Sierra Leone—and every single song on here is worth a listen. Highlights: We Major, Drive Slow, Touch The Sky, Heard Em’ Say, Late, Hey Mama, DFSL, & Roses.
   
2. The College Dropout 9/10 His debut album made a great impression. Soulful, funny, and inspiring, TCD touches on various relatable themes: faith (Jesus Walks), hating your lame ass dead-end job (Spaceship), family love (Family Business), materialism (All Falls Down), and ambition (Through The Wire). The only downsides are the skits and some of the songs sounding dated. Highlights: Family Business, Last Call, All Falls Down, Spaceship, Slow Jamz, Two Words, Never Let Me Down, and Jesus Walks.
   
3. My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy 9/10 Late Registration had elements of movie-scores in its songs, but MBDTF feels like an actual big-screen experience. The album is entertaining from start to finish, with its guest appearances, maximal production, and storyline (the “price” of fame and public embarrassment). A great apology album that will never stop being talked about; best first listen ever. I do agree with it being a little overrated; All of the Lights kinda sounds all over the place and the album isn’t as entertaining after Runaway - but Lost in the World is his best closer. Highlights: Dark Fantasy, Gorgeous, Power, Devil in a New Dress, So Appalled, LITW, Monster, and Runaway.
   
4. Graduation 9/10 Most people think this album is overrated, and to be fair it sounds a bit dated. When I re-listen to it though, it still is uplifting and infectious; it’s like that “perfect espresso shot in the morning”. The album contains some of the best music in his catalogue - and in the hip-hop genre in general. (Flashing Lights is a perfect song.) Highlights: Flashing Lights, Good Morning, Champion, I Wonder, Everything I Am, Can’t Tell Me Nothing, Big Brother, & Homecoming.
   
5. The Life of Pablo 8.9/10 Everything about this project—especially the cover—is so Kanye. After his industrial-experimental-yeezus-phase (idk what to call it), Kanye’s music is more “modern” and “trap-based” on this album—he utilizes production from Metro Boomin; for the most part, his rapping and lyrics aren’t taken that seriously. You can also tell that this is where Fashion started to take his attention. Regardless of all the flaws and awkward moments, it keeps your attention and weirds you out—Just like Ye does himself. And just like Ye, its a paradox: we opened with Ultralight Beam (a song that begins with prayers and ends with gospel singing) and went right into FSMH, pt.1 (the song with the bleached-asshole verse). It’s funny, introspective, annoying, childish, and impressive - just like him. Highlights: FSMH, pt.1, ULBM, Freestyle 4, Famous, NMPILA, Saint Pablo, 30 Hours, Waves, FML, I Love Kanye, & Saint Pablo.
   
6. Yeezus 8.9/10 Around this time, breaking into the Fashion industry was a major challenge for Kanye, and naturally, he became more angry in his interviews. For the most part, Yeezus sounds like anger and frustration—the first seconds of On Sight alienates most non-Kanye fans. Thematically, Ye takes on a character—Yeezus—who embodies his most negative traits: arrogance, insensitivity, and hostility. It shows up in some of the lyrics too (“eating Asain pussy..”). After New Slaves, the album gets more tender-sounding and sad—you have classics like Hold My Liquor, BOTL, and Guilt Trip. It reveals that this obnoxious Yeezus character has a sap backstory. By the end, we reach a resolution with Bound 2, the most accessible song on here (greatest music video ever). Just like 808s, it stands out from the rest of his discog, and is a bit annoying, but once you get it, you get it. Highlights: New Slaves, HML, Bound 2, BOTL, Black Skinhead, Guilt Trip, & Im In It.
   
7. 808s & Heartbreak 8/10 Great. Great. Great. After a tumultuous period, Kanye, being the musical pioneer that he is, decided to ditch the hip-hop samples and beats, for 808s and auto-tuned singing, and it was polarizing to the hip-hop audience. I feel like he’s more of a songwriter - in the traditional sense - on here. This album also has an amazing 6-track run (Say You Will —> Paranoid; RoboCop ain’t it). The instrumentals are melancholy, and this is the first time we see collaborations from Kid Cudi—whose sound is definitely present on this album. Imp, Some of the songs—RoboCop, Bad News, & See You in My Nightmares—sound soooooo 2008, they were a little hard to listen to. Yet, there is still is a reason why this album has the impact that it does; along with Cudi, it lead future rap artists to become more versatile with their discographies—look at XXXTENTACION, JuiceWrld, & Lil Uzi Vert.
   
8. Ye 8/10 Ye is his shortest output, and even compared to 808s, one of his most emotional as well. Besides All Mine, there isn’t much wrong with this album; it gets straight to the point. Some problems here though: You can tell this is when he started recorded his vocals on his iPhone, his mumble verses are more present, which gives an unfinished feeling to it. Besides that, its mainly filled with great, strong songs. Sonically, it’s soulful, tender, and oddly peaceful. Theres a heavy sense of vulnerability, regret, and introspection. I think this album needs a lot more attention than it gets. Highlights: ITAKY, No Mistakes, Violent Crimes, Ghost Town (duhh), & Wouldn’t Leave.
   
9. Donda 6/10 This would be a very-fitting last release (if done correctly): at the time he divorced from Kim Kardashian and became a billionaire in the same year, which naturally attracted more attention to his legacy—this is when I started listening to his music. His life story is inspiring and releasing an album named after his late-Mother (Donda West) would’ve been the perfect closing-album. Irecent memory, I can’t remember being more hyped about a music release. This rollout was legendary—from the Reddit subs, to the instagram posts, to the listening parties. Perfect way to advertise an album. The result is messy, though. Sonically, this is like The Life of Pablo, pt. 2: constant ups-and-downs in quality, yet still delivering amazing songs. Theres also a lot of unneeded material on here too—27 fucking tracks (32 if you include all the part 2’s)—and the mixing really sticks out like a sore-thumb and ruins the experience. Guest appearances were really show-stopping—especially Don Toliver and Kid Cudi on “Moon”. It’s also his most spiritual project (he edited out the curse words); we haven’t seen this much religious faith since The College Dropout imo. Beautiful, yet messy. Highlights: Moon, Praise God, Keep My Spirit Alive, Hurricane, Come to Life, 24, Off the Grid, Pure Souls, and God Breathed.
   

Long story so please bear with me
I was with my first love for 3 and a bit years, we met in late 2010 before we broke up 10 years ago in early 2014. We were young and in our early 20s back then, things just fizzled out.
I've always thought about her but eventually we went our separate ways, she got in to a relationship with another guy after me for a few years but eventually he ended up cheating on her, this was around 2017.
After her breakup in 2017 I confessed my feelings for her but we didn't go anywhere with it as she was still healing so I told her I need to cut her off at the point because I told her I was struggling to be just friends with her, to which she said that she was heartbroken that's it come to us parting ways. But we wished each other well and went our separate ways. I was really at my lowest at that point but have come a really long way since in terms of having a successful career and have improved a lot financially and mentally.
At the start of 2019, she did add me on social media but she didn't say anything to me so a few days later I ended up deleting her because I realised I still wasn't over her, I regretted deleting her afterwards.
At the end of 2019 I heard that she was engaged, she ended up getting married but then I heard she got divorced around over 2 years ago. A few monthds ago I found out that the reason for her divorce was because her husband cheated on her and was abusive towards her. They got divorced around early 2022. Her ex husband is already engaged and due to get married again this summer.
As for me I did get in to another relationship with someone else but I was also cheated on so I have been single for a few years now, I have been evolving in my career and proud of how far I've come and have recently started a new chapter in my career. I considered getting in touch with her last year but I noticed that she had cut off a lot of people from her social media so I wasnt too sure how she'd react to me adding her, I thought she'd reject me seen as she's cutting off a lot of people.
So around 3 months ago I took the plunge seen as I had nothing to lose and sent her a request on instagram, and she had accepted and also followed me back. She's been viewing my stories and a month ago I posted a life quote on my story which she liked, I haven't spoke to her yet. I posted a few pictures of myself which she hasn't liked but A few weeks ago I posted a quote on my story that said 'be the reason for someone's pain to turn into a smile', she liked that quote and also another one that I posted last week. It was my birthday a few days ago and she liked a birthday story that I posted on instagram.
I'm assuming she is single but not entirely sure. I added her 3 months ago but now she has deleted me, I was confused because she only liked one of my stories few days prior. At the time of her deletion, i was on holiday performing umrah. I would have liked to see if there was future for us but don't think she's interested now, i have messaged her after she deleted me saying 'Hi, hope your well. I probably should have said something a long time ago but I didn't, my fault. I've been praying for you, today I realise I've been deleted anyways I hope your keeping happy and healthy'. She replied saying 'Hey I'm good thanks hope you are too, that is kind of you, I didn't expect this kind of message'.
I didn't really know what to say back to her, I still don't understand why she deleted me even though days before she was showing an interest in my stories before and now she's deleted me. I just replied saying 'that's good. Sorry for catching you off guard with it, I wanted to reach out to you earlier. I'm glad your doing well though' and then she has replied back saying 'can I ask why?' I replied back saying 'It's been on my mind for a while to get back in touch with you, I didn't add you for no reason. But we don't need to if it's not something your comfortable with'. She then sent a long message as follows: 'You don’t make me feel uncomfortable. I have thought about you over the years and wished you well. I am really happy that you have also been called to do umrah and i hope it changes your life the same way it did mine. I removed you because you have my ex and his family on your instagram and I removed everyone who has any contact with them. You will have heard that I was married there for a short period of time but it was hell and now I’m out of it I don’t want them knowing anything about my life, so I removed everyone who has any link with them. I didn’t realise till that day that you did. It was nothing to do with you personally.' .
Im not actually friends with her ex husband as he is just someone that lives nearby to me and we have never spoken so I replied with this: 'I'm sorry that you had to go through that, I hope your okay and I pray god brings you ease. I wouldn't exactly say I have anything to do with them personally though, only thing I know about them is that they're from my area too. It makes sense now and it's understandable why you did that.'
She replied back again saying 'I'm great, God is the best of planners and it was the best thing for me. Even so, I removed everyone who had us both so sorry about that' and to which I replied 'That's fair enough, I'm glad to hear your doing well though and that your at peace now. That's what matters most'. She then asked 'how have you been, what's new with you?' I replied saying 'I'm not too bad thanks, life's changed a lot since we last spoke so there's quite a lot that's new lol'. after that we were speaking generally about the holiday that I'm currently on and what to do as she has been here before too and she also asked how long I'm there for and she asked who ive gone with and how long im on holiday for, it was in general a short and civilised conversation and the conversation happened whilst i was still deleted.
Towards the end of the conversation she said 'well i hope you have a lovely time 😊' and i replied with thank you and asked her when she was on holiday here, she replied saying that she went last November and the year before so then i replied saying 'oh nice, its good to go often. Need to make it a yearly thing' She ended the conversation 12 nights ago by liking that last message i sent, I don't know if she plans to message me again, What are the chances that she'll message me even if we don't follow each other on instagram anymore.
I am slightly anxious that she won't message me after this due to her deleting me because her ex is on my Instagram. Was thinking of just giving her space for a few more days, then deleting her ex and requesting her back in around in a few days bear in mind she deleted me 2 weeks ago and we havent spoken in 12 days. In the meantime i have been removing a lot of meaningless connections from my instagram and i will be removing her ex and his family too, i have also noticed that her number of following has also decreased as she has also been cutting down on the number of connections she has. I blame myself for this situation because I had the opportunity to delete her ex and his family a few months ago as I don't even speak to them, had I done that then she wouldn't have deleted me. Its been 2 weeks, should i take action or give her space?

Some of you might know me here. I have posted about the creation of the tabletop game Goblin Auction. This post is meant to be an overview of what I did to create my game, market it and start a Kickstarter for it. Spoiler alert, the Kickstarter did not reach its funding goal and I will also go into what I learned, what I would do instead and what is next for my specific project. I hope you can glean something from my experience if you are also going to games yourself and thinking about self-publishing.
I worked on the creation and marketing of Goblin Auction from about August 2023 to April 2024. That is about 8 to 9 months of really putting in the hours and being serious about game creation. I started as anyone should. Some basic printed cards and components and just playing the games with friends on a regular basis. I honed the project to a point where I had the basic idea of what I was going for and I could move on to the art. (Note: I understood that the game would likely go through many changes before the end. This may require me to redo art or change some significant things, but for personal motivation, starting the art and getting some semblance of what the final game would look like was important to me. Also, starting art and putting out posts can start accruing more attention than just a text post about a game’s creation.)
I have the luxury (or maybe not haha) of being an artist and trained in creating illustration. I didn’t have to pay for someone to design my game for me so the majority of the time spent on the game was spent with me drawing. Art, in my opinion, is the best way to market your game. A good looking and polished product is always better than a good concept in text format, although preferably you’d want both. With drawings I was able to start posting about my game. I felt like this was the best course of marketing for the project initially that costs no money and I could record speed art timelapses and post progress in stages to get feedback from a growing community of people.
Throughout this process, I was posting on mainly Reddit and Instagram. I had a YouTube and posted sometimes to it but not often and everything was mainly art. Retrospectively, I think what would have been a better idea was creating a dev log of how the game is going, what part of the process I am at, showing off the game’s core mechanics and new abilities and combos I was working on. It would give people a better sense for the game’s mechanics beyond just the flashy art as I found that, towards the end, the main thing that I didn’t feel like I conveyed well was how the game was played.
I eventually tried to start branching to new platforms. The one I really liked and found the most value from was Discord. I set up a server, just a general chat and a voice channel and started getting people actually interested in the game interacting there. I think what I wish I would’ve done is started seeking out as many communities that already had my target audience, tabletop gamers, and mingled there more. I also tried to establish myself on BoardGameGeek, but I found it unnecessarily un-user friendly. I have heard from many people that it is the hub for many people when it comes to tabletop gamers, but it was unnecessarily complicated to create a game page and designer page and even understand what the best course was when it came to even using it, so I abandoned it altogether. Not sure if that was the right move and I do think that it may be something I need to really crack down on and understand when moving forwards.
Then came finding a quote and the Kickstarter. I found a quote from Panda Game Manufacturing for about $8000 for 2000 units with the idea that international shipping would cost $2000 and I personally added a buffer of $2000 to be safe for a total of $12,000. In hindsight, this was wayy too high. I saw big projects get funded and assumed if I had a good product and did my job, that it would be enough to fund. And I still think this was possible, but I had to do a lot more advertising wise to get over that hump (advertising is not my strong suit, so admittedly this was the hardest learning curve I had to overcome). Anyways, long story short, the Kickstarter didn’t get funded, reaching only about 29% of the final goal, which I will emphasize is a LOT and I am very grateful for everyone who did actually contribute and sorry that the full vision wasn’t realized into a product.
So, what have I learned?

• I learned that I need to stop thinking so big so early. Of course, the dream should be to go into bulk manufacturing and I’m not saying I never will do that, but for a first game with a growing community, runs of a smaller amount of units, therefore a cheaper funding goal would be better, and if I exceed that goal by a large margin then I can talk about quoting for a larger amount.
• Advertising should NOT only be done through free means. It can only get you so far to try and adhere to every subreddit’s guidelines on self promotion and showing off what you have before you’ve exhausted everyone that’s going to see your product. I think that if you’re serious about tabletop game creation, you should understand that it will cost some money. Of course a huge savings of mine was doing the art myself, but I should have had a plan for marketing and budgeting that out to begin with before I pressed the launch button. I started to go through Meta advertising and paying to boost posts on Instagram, but I think I should have done that before the campaign started and used that follower count on the pre-launch page to gauge the general interest for the product.
• In terms of paid advertisement as well as resources for better looking advertisements, I should have gotten a few prototypes made, done some photo shoots myself and also sent out copies to board game reviewers and streamers to try.
• I should have created specific video trailers and explanation videos. A “How to Play” video was definitely a MUST that I did not create. Beyond that, little posts about card interactions and different strategies in the game would’ve been a great idea to boost engagement, especially releasing that over a planned period of time to always have something new to post about.

And what’s next for Goblin Auction?
I have heard that a failed Kickstarter is the worst outcome for up and coming games due to image and perception of the game. I personally take it as a big lesson and don’t have any plans of giving up just because my first try didn’t go as I wanted.
For Goblin Auction, the game is not dead to me. It just needs more work. More tiers for Kickstarter than just “Base Game”. For the second launch I will be creating new expansions. An Orc expansion that allows for PvP combat, and a Gremlin expansion that allows for co-op gameplay and a variant Hut deck that allows for different decisions when getting victory points to win the game. I would create all this before re-releasing as well as seeing about trinkets and ad-ons to give backers better options and more to have a more well-rounded Kickstarter experience. This also includes those How to Play and explanation videos that I had been avoiding before.
For me personally, though, these new expansions won’t be immediate. I will take my time in creating something that truly is worth investing money into, like was my mindset with the original base game of Goblin Auction. I also will not solely focus on Goblin Auction and pursue some other game ideas that I have had for a while. This is all happening outside of my day job, so it definitely is going to be a long process, but I am truly excited to show off the ideas I have had, and to make more games!
Thank you for those who have followed my journey so far and stick around for the future of Dirty Gold Games!

Has anyone had any success with getting help for weight loss? I have PCOS and I’ve been told to try to loose weight for over two years now but best I can manage is staying at my current weight (about 50 pounds over weight) with watching what I eat and exercising. If I indulge even a little I gain. Has anyone had luck with getting a doctor to start them on any weight loss medication? I am insulin resistant but am not considered pre-diabetic or diabetic yet. My doctor has refused to prescribe any weight loss medication. Any advice on what I can do? Should I try a new doctor?
Back story I am currently taking metformin, inositol, and a progesterone pill to induce periods. No regular cycles for over four years and we’ve been trying to conceive naturally for about two years. I’ve been told losing weight would help my symptoms and chances of conceiving but yet she doesn’t want to start me on anything to help me lose weight. I’ve experienced no weight loss on the metformin. I feel like my life has just been on pause for years.

It’s far more likely one can successfully lengthen the interval between eating meals, rather than reduce the number of calories consumed per meal, without causing a physiological rebellion which interferes with these changes.
Ultimately, increasing the duration of fasting between meals responds better to practice than restricting calories at meals, because the physiology that governs length of fasting is more malleable.
Fasting is more consistent with evolution, where food was more scarce and fasting for several days to weeks, followed by feasting, was the norm.
On the other hand, securing the big kill and then restricting portion sizes, when one didn’t know when the next meal would arrive, is nonsensical.
So our physiology evolved to accommodate fasting intervals of several days and longer, which is why appetite drops off substantially after a few days (even sooner with regular practice) and the starvation phase generally doesn’t interfere with carrying out everyday activities, whereas severe caloric restriction several times per day often does not lead to the same dropoff in appetite and typically does interfere with typical functioning.
In the former case, one is eating consistent with physiological signaling, feasting until a strong satiety signal is activated, whereas in the latter instance, one never registers a strong satiety signal due to the restriction in amount of intake.
The attainment of this strong satiety signal seems like a key factor in the success of multi-day fasting, particularly when done repetitively as in rolling fasts.
As a result, it takes more willpower to lose a significant amount of weight via caloric restriction several times per day and the maintenance of that weight loss is even more difficult and less likely.
Full Disclosure: Rolling 72-96 hrs and soon 96-120 hrs, and not feeling more than mildly hungry (no hunger to mild hunger) during fasting period.