Take over car payments in san diego

San Diego "American's finest" food sub.

2014.08.12 01:29 AOL_ San Diego "American's finest" food sub.

Official food sub for sandiego Dedicated towards showcasing food from all over the San Diego area - especially our local border cuisine (INCLUDING TIJUANA). When posting pictures or discussing local restaurants please include the price of the dish featured. We restrict blatant advertising, forwarding traffic offsite, monetized videos & survey collection. Please use the advertising system for such content.: https://ads.reddit.com/?utm_source=d2x_consumer&utm_name=top_nav_cta
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2014.08.07 21:52 AOL_ Food Los Angeles

Food Los Angeles is dedicated to showcasing food from all over the greater Los Angeles area. Share pictures, reviews and news, and get food advice straight from the hungry Angelenos that know best!
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2008.12.18 01:21 San Diego "America's Finest City"

The official subreddit for San Diego California, "America's Finest City", we’re a rapidly growing (over 360,000 strong!) community serving the whole of the San Diego. We also serve the various counties, plus info concerning our sister city Tijuana MX in the sharing of information, opinion and events to bring us closer together in the richness & diversity that makes us “America’s finest city” *Please READ our rules before posting*
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2024.05.19 20:46 EverhardWriting I was asked to shoot a bear for 5000 dollars

I never believed in monsters, but the events of last week made me question those beliefs to a great extent.
The job seemed pretty simple at first: some people saw a strange creature in the woods and the mayor of their little no name town was willing to pay me for taking it down. He offered me 5000 dollars for shooting what was probably just a mangy bear, I’d be a fool for turning him down. Besides, he even paid me half of it in advance AND offered to lend me the keys to a private bungalow near the forest, to make my stay more comfortable. It took some time for the keys to arrive (postal services be damned), but after about a week it was time for me to head out. I packed my rifle, ammunition and some clothes and got in my truck. This would be the job of a lifetime.
When I arrived at the town, there were no signs of life. I chalked it up to it being 11 PM on a Tuesday, but even so, you’d expect at least a few lights to be on, right? Nevertheless, I continued driving until I reached my “home” for the coming few days.
The bungalow was small, it looked more like a cabin. Then again, I wasn’t here for a vacation anyways, I was here to work. As I tried unlocking the front door, I noticed it was already open. Strange, I thought to myself, but nothing unusual. It’s not like you’d have to worry about people breaking into your house in a small town in bumfuck nowhere.
Once inside, I threw my bag on the floor and plopped down onto a chair. It was a long drive, and I was tired. After grabbing a beer from my bag I began to mentally prepare for the days to come. Tomorrow, I would visit the mayor and ask for any leads of their “creature’s” whereabouts, after which I would spend the remainder of the day scouring the forest for any tracks. If my hunt wasn’t successful by then I would simply try again the day after. Easy job, easy plan and easy money. I finished my beer and decided to go to bed.
That night, I was awoken by my stomach’s inability to digest alcohol. I rushed to the bathroom while vomit started to work its way up my throat. Sadly, I was too late, and now the bathroom door was covered in beer and the half-digested sandwiches I had the day before. I cussed for a while, thinking about how stupid this whole situation was. Sure, my body had not been the same since the accident, but I never had trouble drinking before. After sitting there for a while I went searching for something to clean up my work of art. A thorough inspection of the bungalow led me to a closet, where I finally found a mop and went to town on my stomach’s content.
I was humming a little song to help lighten up my mood, but when I heard someone humming back to me from outside my whole demeanor changed. I quit cleaning immediately and snuck over to my backpack. As soon as I did that, the humming stopped and was replaced by a man’s voice.
“Sorry… Didn’t want to startle you there… Buddy!” the mysterious man said, with no discernable emotion in his voice.
I sat in silence, loading my rifle while I listened to the man outside. Sure, it was no bear, but random people hanging around your place in the middle of the night rarely spell good news. I waited for him to start speaking again, but he did not resume talking, no matter how long I sat there in silence. An hour had passed and still he had not said a word. I figured it was probably just a local drunk that found his way to the cabin, heard me hum, hummed along like a merry drunk guy would and then left because why not. Drunk guys do what drunk guys do. After coming up with this rational explanation, I went to sleep again, thinking about how weird that whole situation had been.
When I woke up in the morning my stomach pain was gone. I got out of bed, packed my stuff and headed to my truck. I noticed the scratches on the truck almost immediately. I remember thinking that it must have been that drunk guy from the night before and that I would make him pay for this if I ever saw him again. Angrily, I got in the car and drove over to the town hall. On my way there, I once again noticed the lack of people in the street. The road being empty on a Tuesday night made perfect sense, but not even one person having to drive to work on a Wednesday morning? That’s suspicious, and it should have been one of the many things that should’ve made me reconsider the job. My car needed a new paint job though, and even then, I’ve always been a stubborn bastard. As I drove, I thought I saw someone move behind a building in my rear view mirror, but I didn’t get a clear view of the person. I felt happy to see that there actually were people in this town, so I continued my drive.
When I got to the town hall the first thing I noticed was the broken window. That drunk guy must’ve vandalized more than just my truck, I thought at the moment. I got out of my car and walked up to the front door, which was open, and entered the building. Upon walking into the entrance hall I was met by a rotten smell. My vomit would’ve been all over the floor if it hadn’t been for my little adventure yesterday, that’s how bad it was. It smelled like a mixture of dead animals, fermenting plants and rotting milk. I considered turning around and leaving right then and there, but I decided to at least try to talk to the mayor, to find out what was going on. Curiosity killed the cat, I thought, but I was no cat. Stupid as I was, I didn’t bother going back to the car to get my rifle. What was the worst thing that could happen? Against better judgment, I went to search for the mayor.
When I found him, his body was lying on the floor, completely dead. He was missing an arm and his face. His torso had been ripped to shreds. His office had been completely ruined too, with random office supplies and some antique vases lying scattered on the floor, along with a picture of the mayor and his wife. Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse, I heard a familiar voice coming from the hallway: the drunk guy from last night.
“Hey… I know you’re in here somewhere… Dude,” he said, his voice still as monotone as before.
His footsteps were heavy, growing louder with every step as he got closer and closer. Along with his footsteps, the sound of something being dragged across the floor could be heard. I even heard his breathing, heavy and labored, as he neared the mayor’s office. Suddenly, all of the sounds stopped. I knew he was right outside the door, waiting for me to make a move. I just sat there, regretting my choice of not taking my rifle with me. Then I realized something. I realized that I’m a 6’3 foot man who weighs 250 pounds and also used to be a boxer in his younger years. I got up with my fists ready to throw some punches and decided to make this man regret screwing with my car. I could hear the man scratching at the wall as I neared the door.
“Found you!” he yelled, his voice sounding more guttural than before.
I felt a sharp pain in my shoulder as my aggressor knocked me to the floor, followed by the warm sensation of blood flowing out of my wound. I remember thinking that the bastard had stabbed me.
The man jumped at me before I was able to regain my balance, forcing me to roll to the side to avoid him. That’s when I noticed that this “man” wasn’t a person at all. At the moment, all I could see was something vaguely bipedal, hunched over a bit and covered in long black fur. What I thought had been a knife were actually a set of long claws on each hand.
The creature began to turn towards me, and I took this as my sign to move. I picked up a vase that was lying next to me and threw it at the monster, hitting it straight in the head. Then I got up in an instant and booked it. As I was running, I could hear the creature following me closely behind. Its roars became more and more animalistic with each passing second, clearly enraged from my attempt to fight back. I practically jumped down the stairs, nearly breaking my legs in the process, after which I continued my sprint towards the door. Without thinking twice I just busted through the surprisingly weak door.
Once outside, I noticed more creatures coming at me in the corner of my eyes. Filled with adrenaline, I ran to my truck, got inside and started the engine. That’s when the creature from earlier came falling down in the parking space right next to me. The bastard had jumped through the first floor’s window. When it got up, I finally got a good look at the thing. The thing that I heard it drag across the floor was its tail, and the things that stabbed me and scratched my car were the massive claws on its hands. Yet the thing that got me the most, the thing that will forever haunt my dreams, was its face. Or, to put it in better words, the contorted face of a man, plastered over its head. It was the same face I saw on the mayor’s picture.
I stepped on the gas and floored it. While driving, I noticed more and more creatures started to give chase, each one wearing a different face. I drove as fast as I could until they were all out of sight and I had left the town. Even then, I did not drop my speed, probably committing multiple traffic violations as I drove. But I did not care. The stuff I saw there was way above my paygrade, and I wanted to get as far away from it as possible. I drove for hours, only stopping to tank my car.
This incident happened a few days ago. Currently, I’m still in the hospital, waiting for the wound in my shoulder to heal. The doctors say I’m lucky that I can still move my arm. Sure, I’m happy to be alive, but life isn’t all sunshine and rainbows for me. I’ve racked up more debt than the 2500 dollars can pay and as if that wasn’t enough, men in black suits have been interviewing me ever since I got here. So if you’re reading this, please just remember one thing: if some guy offers you 5000 dollars just to shoot a bear, stay away. Because there’s no way in hell those things were bears.
submitted by EverhardWriting to everhardwriting [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:46 RainbowBeezy Help deciding if I should buy a building or business

Hi Everyone. I'm looking for some advice on whether or not to purchase a business that's for sale in my city.
Here's the TLDR version - we want to expand our antique booth business into an antique store/mall. We are debating between purchasing a vacant building and starting from scratch, or buying an existing but mismanaged store with inventory. I'm not sure if either is worth leaving my full time job for.
For some background, my dad and I have ran a successful antique booth at someone else's antique mall for several years. In the last year, we've averaged $1000 in sales, with around $300 in expenses each month (buying merchandise, and renting the space). We spend probably 4-5 hours a week sourcing merch, researching, pricing, and maintaining the display.
Unfortunately, the owner of the mall was ready to retire, and sold the building to an unrelated business, ending the good thing we had going. We had the opportunity to buy the business from her, but she wanted over a million and we just couldn't swing it. There are a few other antique malls in our area, but all have long waiting lists to get in (one has over 100 vendors waiting!) And all charge a bit more in rent/commission than we were paying at the place we were at.
Anyway, long story short we see a need/opportunity in our market for another mall, but finding a building that meets our needs and is affordable for us has been challenging. We looked at several for rent but the price and uncertainty of rent increasing as time goes on made us look more at ownership.
We then found a 7500 sq ft building listed for sale for 260k, and we think we could possibly talk them down to 200ish. It's 2 floors (not super desirable for an antique business as elderly people sometimes struggles with stairs) but we considered that the lower level could be rented out to a contractor type business, as it has its own entrance and garage door. The other drawback is parking - the lot is tiny and only fits like 6 cars at once. I drew up a crude map of how we could divide the space for vendors, and I think we could net 5-6k a month in booth rent, plus a % commission on sales, plus renting the basement out, plus continuing to sell our own items.
Lastly, we stumbled upon an existing antique business where the elderly owners are ready to retire and are selling their business, including the building and fully stocked store. The building is 4500 sq ft, and on a busy road with ample parking. They own all of the merchandise in the store, as they do not use the "mall" model, which they explained is due to them not being able to keep to set hours because of their health. They're asking 300k, which from my super limited knowledge seems in the realm of reasonable for the building and merchandise. We asked them about the property taxes, utilities, etc., but didn't ask about sales - mainly because I don't think their sales numbers would be relevant since they've been running the business like a hobby for years now, not being open set hours, not bringing in new merchandise, refreshing displays, or advertising at all. Their merchandise is also priced a lot higher than we typically sell things for.
Our plan would be to host a "going out of business" sale for most of the merchandise in their store currently, marking everything to 50% of what they've priced it at. Then, after we've hopefully sold off a large chunk of the product we "close" their store, and open ours in it's place with a new name, and condense our stuff down to half or less of the store and start renting out booths to other vendors.
The main problem I run into with both the vacant building and the established business is that it's just so hard to determine how much money we can actually make. We have the data from running our booth, but does that scale at a true multiple when we increase our space? I have a full time job that, frankly I would love to leave if I could make as much money elsewhere. I know that for a while as we are getting established I would have basically 2 full time jobs and I'm okay with that, but I'm worried that it won't ever make enough to justify leaving my current job and I'll be working 80 hours a week for the rest of my life. My dad, who would be my business parter, is retired but mostly wants to stay that way - again, he will put in the hours now but would like to scale back his time eventually, plus we need some time to go out and source new merchandise.
Neither of us have ever owned a business (and my dad has never even worked a retail job before...) so I know there are probably some key things I'm overlooking - please be honest with me and tell me what I'm missing and whether or not you would consider taking the leap or if this is the stupidest idea in the history of business.
submitted by RainbowBeezy to smallbusiness [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:45 GiversBot /u/Hamburgo [REQ] was deleted from /r/borrow on 2024-05-19 (t3_so6vk2 up 830.50 days, LONGTAIL)

Hamburgo deleted from /borrow

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[REQ] ($8000-$1000) (#Adelaide, South Australia, Australia) (Repayment: $100-$500 a week) (PayPal, Bank Transfer)

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Howdy all! I am so excited to have discovered this subreddit! Hoping I get lucky with someone kind hearted who can help!
I am pretty flexible on the amount, ideally I would love 8k to be able to consolidate all my debts however right now even just some money will do.
Situation: I was unemployed. Started borrowing money here and there over 2 years from family and friends. Got in to a terrible cycle of giving someone my whole pay check to pay them off, then having to borrow more to get by until I was paid next (government pension), then doing the same thing. I owe people between $600-$3000 dollars. I also have 3 “little” pay day loans taking money out my account each week (have gotten them a few times and always paid off). The people I owe money to want weekly amounts like $200, $300, $100 etc so by the time I’ve paid them all I have nothing and end up borrowing AGAIN. I’m looking to just end all this by consolidating my loans: for example it’ll be cheaper to pay someone here $250-300 a week (more than a bank loan even) than 4 people that amount.
I’ve never been bankrupt or not paid a loan etc. I have successfully paid off a $3040 debt by the due date. Never been late!
About me: Currently employed in a secure job as a dental practitioner (oral health therapist). Right now the books are slow due to 2 dentists leaving but I’m still making at minimum $600 a week, obviously usually more.
I’m 26, live at home with family.
Besides rent ($100 a week) and petrol and medications I have no real expenses so I’m not worried about not being able to afford this loan.
You can choose the interest — I would seriously be happy to pay an extra few thousand just to consolidate all these now. I need the peace of mind. I am sick of living pay check to pay check and having $0 in my account after paying everyone and then borrowing more or taking out stupid payday loans which just cause more stress.
In Australia if I were to lose my job I would be able to go on the pension and get $600 a fortnight so I will always have an income. However dental jobs are easy to come by now due to covid vaccine requirements and like I said my job is stable, I love my job.
I am happy to provide every single detail needed: address, photo ID, employment details and boss contact details, have my friend vouch for me that I am trustworthy and have repaid loans on time etc. Also I would get a statutory declaration from the police station with the conditions of our agreement and have it signed and authorised by a police officer. You can have all my social media etc etc I am not worried about not being able to repay it so can give any details you want!
I am able to be flexible if you want to charge me more or need it paid back by a specific date. Ultimately $100-$500 a week would be best for me, but I guess $250-$300 would be the standard.
Please please please if you can help me, I would appreciate it so much.
I am never ever ever borrowing money off people again!
Also: I am ineligible for bank loans/credit card. The reason for this is because my job is too new and I’m not a permanent employee on the books (despite having set hours etc guaranteed work they just have me as casual). Banks have said I can wait 6 months to apply but I’m also worried I may have killed my credit applying for too many crappy pay day loans and getting rejected while unemployed. So yeah that’s why I have turned to here! I am desperate and will pay $$$ interest!!!
Thank you for reading.
Also if someone is able to do say a smaller loan that would be good to however because I owe someone $600 on Monday and I have these 3 small loans (totally $1000 if I were to pay them out early) it’ll be smaller payments like $50 a week due to me still owing everyone money. But once I’ve gotten those out the way could pay off quickly in one pay cycle (weekly).
Any help at all is appreciated! Thank you!!!
submitted by GiversBot to borrowdeletes [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:44 EverhardWriting I was asked to shoot a bear for 5000 dollars

I never believed in monsters, but the events of last week made me question those beliefs to a great extent.
The job seemed pretty simple at first: some people saw a strange creature in the woods and the mayor of their little no name town was willing to pay me for taking it down. He offered me 5000 dollars for shooting what was probably just a mangy bear, I’d be a fool for turning him down. Besides, he even paid me half of it in advance AND offered to lend me the keys to a private bungalow near the forest, to make my stay more comfortable. It took some time for the keys to arrive (postal services be damned), but after about a week it was time for me to head out. I packed my rifle, ammunition and some clothes and got in my truck. This would be the job of a lifetime.
When I arrived at the town, there were no signs of life. I chalked it up to it being 11 PM on a Tuesday, but even so, you’d expect at least a few lights to be on, right? Nevertheless, I continued driving until I reached my “home” for the coming few days.
The bungalow was small, it looked more like a cabin. Then again, I wasn’t here for a vacation anyways, I was here to work. As I tried unlocking the front door, I noticed it was already open. Strange, I thought to myself, but nothing unusual. It’s not like you’d have to worry about people breaking into your house in a small town in bumfuck nowhere.
Once inside, I threw my bag on the floor and plopped down onto a chair. It was a long drive, and I was tired. After grabbing a beer from my bag I began to mentally prepare for the days to come. Tomorrow, I would visit the mayor and ask for any leads of their “creature’s” whereabouts, after which I would spend the remainder of the day scouring the forest for any tracks. If my hunt wasn’t successful by then I would simply try again the day after. Easy job, easy plan and easy money. I finished my beer and decided to go to bed.
That night, I was awoken by my stomach’s inability to digest alcohol. I rushed to the bathroom while vomit started to work its way up my throat. Sadly, I was too late, and now the bathroom door was covered in beer and the half-digested sandwiches I had the day before. I cussed for a while, thinking about how stupid this whole situation was. Sure, my body had not been the same since the accident, but I never had trouble drinking before. After sitting there for a while I went searching for something to clean up my work of art. A thorough inspection of the bungalow led me to a closet, where I finally found a mop and went to town on my stomach’s content.
I was humming a little song to help lighten up my mood, but when I heard someone humming back to me from outside my whole demeanor changed. I quit cleaning immediately and snuck over to my backpack. As soon as I did that, the humming stopped and was replaced by a man’s voice.
“Sorry… Didn’t want to startle you there… Buddy!” the mysterious man said, with no discernable emotion in his voice.
I sat in silence, loading my rifle while I listened to the man outside. Sure, it was no bear, but random people hanging around your place in the middle of the night rarely spell good news. I waited for him to start speaking again, but he did not resume talking, no matter how long I sat there in silence. An hour had passed and still he had not said a word. I figured it was probably just a local drunk that found his way to the cabin, heard me hum, hummed along like a merry drunk guy would and then left because why not. Drunk guys do what drunk guys do. After coming up with this rational explanation, I went to sleep again, thinking about how weird that whole situation had been.
When I woke up in the morning my stomach pain was gone. I got out of bed, packed my stuff and headed to my truck. I noticed the scratches on the truck almost immediately. I remember thinking that it must have been that drunk guy from the night before and that I would make him pay for this if I ever saw him again. Angrily, I got in the car and drove over to the town hall. On my way there, I once again noticed the lack of people in the street. The road being empty on a Tuesday night made perfect sense, but not even one person having to drive to work on a Wednesday morning? That’s suspicious, and it should have been one of the many things that should’ve made me reconsider the job. My car needed a new paint job though, and even then, I’ve always been a stubborn bastard. As I drove, I thought I saw someone move behind a building in my rear view mirror, but I didn’t get a clear view of the person. I felt happy to see that there actually were people in this town, so I continued my drive.
When I got to the town hall the first thing I noticed was the broken window. That drunk guy must’ve vandalized more than just my truck, I thought at the moment. I got out of my car and walked up to the front door, which was open, and entered the building. Upon walking into the entrance hall I was met by a rotten smell. My vomit would’ve been all over the floor if it hadn’t been for my little adventure yesterday, that’s how bad it was. It smelled like a mixture of dead animals, fermenting plants and rotting milk. I considered turning around and leaving right then and there, but I decided to at least try to talk to the mayor, to find out what was going on. Curiosity killed the cat, I thought, but I was no cat. Stupid as I was, I didn’t bother going back to the car to get my rifle. What was the worst thing that could happen? Against better judgment, I went to search for the mayor.
When I found him, his body was lying on the floor, completely dead. He was missing an arm and his face. His torso had been ripped to shreds. His office had been completely ruined too, with random office supplies and some antique vases lying scattered on the floor, along with a picture of the mayor and his wife. Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse, I heard a familiar voice coming from the hallway: the drunk guy from last night.
“Hey… I know you’re in here somewhere… Dude,” he said, his voice still as monotone as before.
His footsteps were heavy, growing louder with every step as he got closer and closer. Along with his footsteps, the sound of something being dragged across the floor could be heard. I even heard his breathing, heavy and labored, as he neared the mayor’s office. Suddenly, all of the sounds stopped. I knew he was right outside the door, waiting for me to make a move. I just sat there, regretting my choice of not taking my rifle with me. Then I realized something. I realized that I’m a 6’3 foot man who weighs 250 pounds and also used to be a boxer in his younger years. I got up with my fists ready to throw some punches and decided to make this man regret screwing with my car. I could hear the man scratching at the wall as I neared the door.
“Found you!” he yelled, his voice sounding more guttural than before.
I felt a sharp pain in my shoulder as my aggressor knocked me to the floor, followed by the warm sensation of blood flowing out of my wound. I remember thinking that the bastard had stabbed me.
The man jumped at me before I was able to regain my balance, forcing me to roll to the side to avoid him. That’s when I noticed that this “man” wasn’t a person at all. At the moment, all I could see was something vaguely bipedal, hunched over a bit and covered in long black fur. What I thought had been a knife were actually a set of long claws on each hand.
The creature began to turn towards me, and I took this as my sign to move. I picked up a vase that was lying next to me and threw it at the monster, hitting it straight in the head. Then I got up in an instant and booked it. As I was running, I could hear the creature following me closely behind. Its roars became more and more animalistic with each passing second, clearly enraged from my attempt to fight back. I practically jumped down the stairs, nearly breaking my legs in the process, after which I continued my sprint towards the door. Without thinking twice I just busted through the surprisingly weak door.
Once outside, I noticed more creatures coming at me in the corner of my eyes. Filled with adrenaline, I ran to my truck, got inside and started the engine. That’s when the creature from earlier came falling down in the parking space right next to me. The bastard had jumped through the first floor’s window. When it got up, I finally got a good look at the thing. The thing that I heard it drag across the floor was its tail, and the things that stabbed me and scratched my car were the massive claws on its hands. Yet the thing that got me the most, the thing that will forever haunt my dreams, was its face. Or, to put it in better words, the contorted face of a man, plastered over its head. It was the same face I saw on the mayor’s picture.
I stepped on the gas and floored it. While driving, I noticed more and more creatures started to give chase, each one wearing a different face. I drove as fast as I could until they were all out of sight and I had left the town. Even then, I did not drop my speed, probably committing multiple traffic violations as I drove. But I did not care. The stuff I saw there was way above my paygrade, and I wanted to get as far away from it as possible. I drove for hours, only stopping to tank my car.
This incident happened a few days ago. Currently, I’m still in the hospital, waiting for the wound in my shoulder to heal. The doctors say I’m lucky that I can still move my arm. Sure, I’m happy to be alive, but life isn’t all sunshine and rainbows for me. I’ve racked up more debt than the 2500 dollars can pay and as if that wasn’t enough, men in black suits have been interviewing me ever since I got here. So if you’re reading this, please just remember one thing: if some guy offers you 5000 dollars just to shoot a bear, stay away. Because there’s no way in hell those things were bears.
submitted by EverhardWriting to nosleep [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:44 LostAlbertan How to buy a car in 5 hours... carmax?

Hello, I'm trying to help a friend buy a car for work. We are both flying blind and only have 5 hours to help take him to see cars. He has 7k to put as down payment, wanted to get something up to 25k. I'm going to give him another 4k to play with.
The scranton P.A area doesn't seem to have many options which means even more driving.
Is carmax our best bet? no haggle + 90 days 4k mile warranty. The upcharge doesn't seem that bad (3k over a new order from dealer just to have it now and not that many miles) but im sure they'll get us on the finance. Any others we should be checking out? Looking at civics/corollas.
Thanks!
submitted by LostAlbertan to carbuying [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:44 ThrowRA_Scrimble578 Girl I'm seeing has a big surprise. Am I overthinking?

There's this girl I've been seeing for two weeks now and on our second date yesterday I found out something that came as a surprise to me but also worried me somewhat.
I met this girl about two weeks ago. For context I'm 20M and she's 18F. On our first meeting and date she gave off basically all green flags. The only real thing I could maybe think about is she is pretty bad with time management showing up 30 minutes late to our first date. I excused it though as she was driving about 2 1/2 hours from where she lives. We clicked very easily and she has a very interesting personality and is generally fun to be around. She told me right away on the first date that she was religious as her dad is a deacon and talks about her dreams for school. I am really liking her and all she stands for. For me personally I look for basically companionship in a partner and want someone who is on the same team as me and I see the same in them.
Come second date and things got a little weird I must say. I'm not sure how I feel yet and I really don't have anyone to tell. For background I had no idea she lived two hours away and feeling a bit guilty offered to go to her for the second date. She suggested hiking as there was a waterfall near where she lived she wanted to show me. Again she was late this time by 2 hours due to an event she thought would end earlier before. Luckily this time she told me somewhat before hands and I didn't spend the whole time waiting at the location. Eventually thought we meet up and head up to the spot about 30 minutes from where we parked. It was heartfelt and we had a lot of fun on the way up and when we finally got up there.
Here's where I get nervous. We were alone up there and after some deeper conversation we embraced and somewhat cuddled while looking over the view for a while. Eventually moving to a new spot under some trees that had a view of the waterfall. I usually like to take dating slower as I don't want the relationship to be based off intimacy alone. During that moment tho we eventually started making out since we were alone. I noticed right away that this girl on the first kissed was going for tongue and everything. That was fine as I sort of rejected the tongue and we continued on. However after that she started to hold tighter to me and rubbing my chest before putting my hand under her shirt for I'm sure you can guess. It caught me off guard but I somewhat went along with it. That's when she leaned into me and whispered that one of her secrets she had was that she was a "freak" and how I make her so horny.
After that I knew from the start that I didn't want to cross this kind of line on a second date so I slowly deescalated the moment before we eventually headed back down. However on the way back down the mood felt a little weird. We were still talking about generally innocent stuff but she asked some questions that felt random at one point. She brought up if I had any ex's and if any of them were toxic. I've never fully dated anyone as in the past I would break things off due to I just not working out. I personally even if someone has wronged me try not to talk or gossip about them as I think it's wrong. Which she kind of seemed surprised at.
For some reason maybe out of instinct to keep the conversation going asked if she had any. After thinking for a moment she mentioned about a boy she dated for a while and how one night when he was high he took her phone and send private photos to her parents. We eventually went back down to our cars and she offered to show me a place to eat. I politely declined because it was around 8:30pm and I had a two hour drive back. I also felt kind of queasy due to either nervousness or maybe because of the intense hiking trail and being a little out of shape.
Now upon self reflection I had a lot to think about. Some of those things that happened I couldn't pin point if they were bad signs or if I'm being too paranoid. My view of this girl somewhat changed. I didn't think each thing mentioned in this story would have been bad to me on its own but when all combined it kind of has me puzzled. I like this girl she seems genuine and has goals along with values. Plus we just clicked. I worry tho if there is something that I don't know that if I continue with this relationship may come back later. Like mentioned before I don't want a relationship built upon only sex. I've seen too many friends have a bad time because of it that doesn't end well for either person. I also don't know if I'm overthinking this or possibly ignoring things because of my feelings. If anyone could offer their view or ask questions if anything needs clarifying I would greatly appreciate it.
submitted by ThrowRA_Scrimble578 to dating [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:42 edom31 Signing off for 2024... all pictured $6

Signing off for 2024... all pictured $6
Title sums it up.
Went to estate sale, all too exagerated in prices... saw a small handwritten sign about a garage sale a few blocks over...
Saw Kind of Blue from the car, was willing to give $5 for it (even without seeing the state of the vinyl,which looks like it was played 5times).
Took records, lady said $1 for all... OK.
Had seen the TT which I do not need (Sony PS212), and asked. She said $5.... I had to take it. I do not know if it works, but simple maintenance stuff I can fix/do. In the end it will make a great gift to a family member if I decide not to keep it (current main TT is a Technics belt sl-b1).
I'm done for the year.
submitted by edom31 to vinyl [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:41 Frosty_Excitement355 Traveling Shoe?

Shoe Story. Glitch? Any other idea?
In 2010, my best friend came home from college for spring break and we decided to go out one night. Our town is tiny and has no nightlife scene so the closest option for anything after dark is an hour away. Her sister happens to live in that same city where we were going. We left my hometown and drove to her sister's place. Got ready at her sister's home, and then I drove my car to the bar. My friend had an eye infection, was taking meds for it, and was wearing her glasses that night. She was also going through what she calls a "weird phase" and did not drink that night. I'm not a heavy drinker and I was driving so I only had a couple of beers the entire time we were out.
So, we stayed at the bar for about 5 hours. The city where we were has a Naval Base and it is not uncommon to meet lots of people who are in the Navy while you're out at this place. So, we talked to a few different pairs of guys throughout the night who were in the Navy. At closing time, we had been talking to one set of guys and they were funny, and entertaining, so, when we left, we decided to ask them if they wanted to get a late night bite to eat at Whataburger, which is around the corner from the bar. After we all ate, they said they needed to get a cab (Uber wasn't a big thing then, so options were limited) to get back to their place. They didn't seem like creepers so I offered to drive them to where they were staying. One sat up front with me, the other sat in the backseat with my friend. I drove them to where they were staying, they got out, and my friend hopped in the front seat.
I drove us to her sister's place, we changed clothes and went to sleep. Never even saw her sister because she was already asleep when we got there earlier that evening since she had to work the next day. The next morning after we woke up we were packing our bags and my friend could only find one of her shoes that she had worn out last night. We looked over the entire apartment and could not find it anywhere. It should be noted that my friend is very minimalistic in her shoe options. She has maybe two pairs of "heels" and a few more flip flop/sneaker options. She had been wearing her one black pair of heels that night and the other pair was 4 hours away in her college town. She was fine leaving with the one shoe because she said they were very inexpensive and she could just buy a new pair to replace the lost one. Because I'm me and can't leave well enough alone, I was very bothered that there was a shoe missing. We went and searched my car, the parking spaces beside my car, everywhere. We went to Whataburger and even went to the place where we dropped off the two random guys and looked in the parking lot. Still no shoe. After not being able to find the shoe, she said it was "ok" and that she would just buy a new pair. I was still very bothered by this, but I just dropped it and we drove the hour back to my home, where we had left her car (locked) in my parents' driveway.
Once we arrived, we were saying goodbye and she grabbed her bag from my car and her car keys from my car, and walked to unlock her car, while still talking to me outside my home. She unlocked the passenger side of her car and immediately began to freak out and asked how I did it. I obviously was clueless and walked over to her car. We stood there looking at the front passenger seat and HER MISSING SHOE WAS THERE.
We have absolutely NO idea how this happened and have thought about this shoe more than I care to admit. It has consumed my brain for FOURTEEN years. We have tried every logical (and illogical) scenario and at one point, she was convinced that I had played this elaborate prank on her, while I thought she had played the prank on me. We have told this story to SO many people and everyone is always baffled.
Glitches in the matrix weren't really as widely known then as they are today and I'm certain that's what happened. Thoughts?
submitted by Frosty_Excitement355 to Glitch_in_the_Matrix [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:40 Odd_Refrigerator_180 6 months into my debt free journey.

6 months into my debt free journey.
I M33 bought a new construction home (estimated value now) 660k-670k depending on where you source your information. I owe 443k on it. After buying the house, spending got out of hand. Expensive yard renovations, new furniture etc, I was also struggling with alcohol addiction to the tune of 400-600 bucks a week on scotch, and drinking out at the barestaurants and the like. Next thing I knew I was 13k in credit card debt. Well me being a dumbass and did not understand taxes for said property (no escrow account as I put 20% down). Got a tax bill of 8.5k (put on a 0% card) so at that point I am 22k in cc debt. Well I quit drinking about 6 months ago and 2 weeks after I quite my wife was looking at the account statements since she had noticed our account not moving up despite my high salary and our relatively low bills. Besides our car payment, insurance and the normal stuff and other spending habits. (155k per year salary) she asked and I told her it’s payments to the CC for the tax bill plus about 13k off drinking, yard projects, vacations etc. she lost it. I know we are ok. (18k in our checking account) I have paid off a good chunk of it and am hoping to have it cleared away by SeptembeOctober as I have cleared it down under 16k. However- that is the exact time the next tax bill comes due. So I am planning on doing another 0% and clearing that over 4-5 months. (I created a saving to handle the home taxes and insurance) but have been using it’s funds to clear out this existing debt crisis. And hoping this plan doesn’t backfire on me. It’s been tough. But I can’t wait to have 3k back per month in income..I guess what I am saying to anyone in the same situation it’s hard and it sucks but keep grinding.
submitted by Odd_Refrigerator_180 to debtfree [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:39 Emergency-Squirrel49 Paying someone money owed

Throw away account.
I loaned someone $5000 and then $1000 to pay for their dog’s vet bill (poisoned) and their car repair. This person lives out of state. This was also 4 months ago.
This person is over their heads in debt. However, they told me they were going to do some kickbacks on some bids and get the money that way.
I did not ask for this nor did I encourage it. I have repeatedly asked for this person to pay me back.
Apparently the kickbacks already happened.
If I accept this money, would I be in criminal danger? Should I ask the person to pay me from their regular paycheck and if so that way, take longer?
I’m pretty confused here what to do.
Any advice would be helpful.
submitted by Emergency-Squirrel49 to legaladvice [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:38 Fine-Historian4018 Retirement savings versus cash savings

Retirement savings versus cash savings
At what point does it make sense to take on debt to ensure you are maxing retirement savings?
For instance, I will probably have to replace my car in 5 years. I could save the money in a HYSA over the next 5 years and pay cash or I could put that amount in retirement and just take out an auto loan when the time comes?
If the stock market earns 10% per year and savings account yields 5% (taxed) and the car debt is 5%. It seems to be a better idea financially to just put it in retirement and take on a loan when I go to purchase right? Ditto for water heateHVAC etc.
submitted by Fine-Historian4018 to MiddleClassFinance [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:36 Radiant-Artist-8419 Will I receive an extra fine?

A few days ago one of my good friends drove me to a party. He said he wanted to drink since I didn’t want to and I said it’s fine since I can just drive his car back to his house and we both crash the night there. Issue was he was on his green Ps and i’m on reds so his car had green Ps and no one had red Ps or spare red Ps.
While driving home I saw one of my other good friends cars and high beamed him a few times. The limit was 80 I stuck to it but he went like 90 and absolutely gapped me. Anyways 2km later a nice chrysler srt pulls up and chucks on the sirens. I pull over straight away and turn off the car. The officer comes and takes my license. He then straight just says accuses me for using carplay. I said it’s not even my car and that I physically haven’t connected my phone but he made me “prove it” by turning it back on.
He wandered back to his car for a minute and came back. He asked me what speed I went I said 80 and he’s like ahaha sure buddy don’t lie and tell me the truth and I said i’m going 80 and he kept trying to make me slip up or something but I said I don’t speed since I wouldn’t risk it and he walks back and comes with breath test now which is fair I guess it’s normal to breath test people anyways and wanders back the car again. He comes about 4 minutes later and said i’m in trouble for using high beams.
Not sure why he had to be so mean and keep trying to accuse me of random stuff it would’ve been fine if he just got to the point I guess I just wanted to get home and it wasn’t even past the red P curfew times so I just stayed as honest and calm as possible.
Anyways he said it’s not a big deal since it’s only one demerit and I will have 6 left. Thing we still joke about is the fact he didn’t realise i’m on my reds after he scanned my license and checked my driving records but there you have it’s the ones responsible to keep the community safe I guess.
He didn’t issue anything didn’t make me do anything on the spot and since he couldn’t even identify I was on my red plates did I receive a fine? He said I may get a fine sent by mail but that’s it do they usually give something in person or is it just fully dealt with by mail? Another question is if they realise I had the wrong plates on after I left can they fine me for that even though they didn’t bring it up when I was there?
submitted by Radiant-Artist-8419 to CarsAustralia [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:36 willybtrash [FN] Fallen

“I want to be human. I want to be human.” I repeat to myself, as I stare into the dusty bathroom mirror.
Doesn’t look like anyone’s been in this bathroom since nineteen-o-dirt. I’m surprised I even found anything way out here. Ran into a couple people on the drive over, but none too friendly.
If I were a betting man, there’s gotta be some place nearby I can get some gas. Car ran out about a mile back, I’ve been hoofing it ever since. Now I’m exhausted, real glad I can’t overheat.
What the hell is with this place anyway? One mile is barren, the next is overgrown. Pockets of leafy green, stitched into this khaki pant leg of earth. It’s confusing to say the least.
“I want to be human.” One last time for good measure, then I throw my bag over my shoulder and step out of the bathroom. Peeking down both ways of the hall, to make sure no one heard me talking to myself.
“Who am I kidding, this place hasn’t seen a soul since my dad got here.” I mumble to the seemingly empty building.
“And it still ain’t seen one yet.” a voice calls from down the stretch of room doors.
I freeze in place, something about that voice seemed familiar. I can’t recall where I had heard it, but l definitely have.
“I’m not here to hurt anyone, just looking for some place safe to stay.” I call down to the disembodied voice.
“A refugee, huh?” A man dressed in a ranchers hat, and a poncho steps from around a door frame. it’s about twenty feet to my right.
“Aren’t we all.” his face is covered by the hats wide brim, but his voice is menacing. “You know, you’re one tough son of a bitch to track down.”
I knew it was stupid to stop in a motel, broad daylight and all. I just wanted to wash up a bit, then I’d be on my way.
“If you’re going to kill me, you better do it quick. Cause hell’s comin’ right behind me.“ I shout, seeing if he’ll call my bluff.
“Sly little devil, but no one is comin’ for ya. Not yet anyhow.” he kicks the base-board of the hall with his spurred boots. “Now, you can either come to me or…” he pauses, letting out a long sigh. “You’re gonna have to do your running on crutches.” He’s serious, hand already on his hip.
“Out of all the hunters, it had to be you.” I wasn’t going to run, there was no point. But how did he know? I stepped into the hall.
“My scouts watched you leave y’all’s little empire of bones. Gave me where you were headed.” He said smugly, I could hear the grin behind his words. He was swaying on his hips. (Could he read my mind?) “Never thought you’d fly the nest, but whaddya know? Looks like fallen angels, regrow wings.”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Spare me the monologue, Jesus! Is this all the time with you?” I put both hands together, and slowly approach so he doesn’t get too antsy. The last thing I want is to catch a bullet from a professional cosplayer.
As I approach, I can see the long hair poking out from under his hat. It’s greasy, probably been on the road for awhile. I know I have. His beard is immaculate though, full, and medium length. I almost ask him where he finds a barber out here. My guessing is he cuts it himself, unless it just always looks that way. The thought annoys me.
Stripping me of my backpack, and searching for more goods, which he finds… (my knife, and a half eaten raw scrap of meat I’d been snacking on.) He wraps my hands in a rope binding. After he’s satisfied the knot is secured, he pats my head.
“There, there, kid. I ain’t gonna hurt ya, but your pa? Yeah, ole’ Baphy might. Once we tell him where you are that is.” That word, kid. It always stung, but this time was especially potent in its venom. His hand grips my shoulder, and pushes me toward the exit.
This place is in ruin, dust on the walls. The floors are starting to decay. Everything in here has either been broken, or scavenged. It’s picked clean. I can’t help but wonder what it was like before, what kind of people stayed here? As we enter the light outside, he steps in front of me. Strapping my pack onto his horse.
A beautiful creature, all white. Shiny, and well fed. No gas required. Dammit, why didn’t I think of that?
“You know he’ll kill us both. My dad doesn’t forgive, like you.” I call out, hoping he’ll show some semblance of mercy.
He finishes fixing my gear to his nag, and turns to me. “Oh, I don’t do the forgiving thing no more.” He steps to me, I can feel his breath on my face. “I fucking hate my neighbors.”
He points to the horse, and steps aside. I guess he wants me to climb on? I step forward and put one foot in a stirrup, while he helps me climb up and over. I laugh to myself. “Look ma, no hands.”
“If I find out who she is, she’ll be buried right beside you and pa.” The laughing stopped, he was serious.
“So, where are you taking me?” I managed to choke out.
“Don’t you worry about that kid, you just make sure you don’t fall off. Can’t make a deal with the devil, if all I have to offer is damaged goods.” He kicked the horse twice, clicked his tongue, and we were off
submitted by willybtrash to shortstories [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:36 zombiestacos 2016 Chevy Cruze LT help!

Hi there! I have a 2016 Cruze, and I need help.
My coolant is leaking, we suspect onto my heater core as we can only smell it when the air or heat is on. The problem is, we can't seem to find any information on how to take my dash apart to try and rectify the issue.
Can anyone help with a video tutorial or anything that would steer us in the right direction?
We have used stop leak, and that only helped for a few weeks.
I lost my long time job earlier this year and unfortunately can't afford the $2000+ it would cost me to have a pro do it right now. I have done most maintenace things myself with help of my fiancee but this is a big job and quite daunting.
Also can't afford a new car payment and need to drive to work.
Any help is greatly appreciated!
submitted by zombiestacos to cruze [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:33 confusedgirl207 My sisters boyfriend raped me and I’m not sure what to do

When I (28F) was 19 and a freshman in college I went to the beach with some friends for spring break. We were staying in a hotel and one day we chose to spend the day drinking at the pool there and grilling, another group of people that some of the guys I was there with knew was also at the pool. I didn’t know the guys in the other group before that day but we were all hanging out by the pool.
That night I had more drinks than I should have and don’t recall how the situation happened but I woke up in the other guys room that 4 of them were staying in. I felt uneasy and like something bad had happened.
Later that next day I was at the beach with my friends and a girl I knew came up to me asking if I was okay. I was confused, I didn’t know what she was referring to, so I asked what she meant. She proceeded to take out her phone and show me a video where one of the guys I met the day before, Kyle (now 27M) on top of me having sex. I was not participating. I was lying there not moving while he was thrusting on top of me.
Kyles friends were all in the room watching it happen and one of them recorded it and sent it to a ton of people that I knew. I don’t remember any of this happening. I felt embarrassed and ashamed and tried to brush it off initially. I didn’t want to play victim because we had both been drinking, he had less than I did, and I had put myself into that situation.
I don’t believe there is any way I would have consented to this. The last thing I remember from the night was talking to one of the guys I had gone to the beach with who I had a crush on (not Kyle). He had tried to kiss me and I remember telling him no because I knew we were both drunk and I didn’t want to do anything I might regret the next day.
A few months later I began hanging out with Kyle and we had sex a few more times, it made me feel less guilty about the situation and I felt like I was in control because if I chose to do it now maybe I had chosen to do it during spring break when I was so drunk I wasn’t conscious.
I tried to push what happened to the back of my mind because forgetting about it was easier than dealing with it. I went back to the same beach with my sister Rachel about 2 years later and Kyle was there again. I was hanging out with my own friends and I happened to be walking by when I heard him scream in front of a group of people that he loved my sister. I began sobbing and just started walking down the beach alone crying unsure of why I was even crying at the time. My sister and I were supposed to stay at the beach for two more days after this one but that night I told her that I needed to go home and couldn’t be there anymore so we packed up and left. My sister was furious and I spent the entire car ride home crying. This was the only big fight we had ever had and we didn’t talk for a week.
Fast forward a few years and I had moved on from this situation, I saw Kyle around town occasionally because we lived in a small town but I was in a new relationship and happy. Then my sister came to me and told me that she and Kyle had started to go on a few dates. At first I didn’t know what to say, she seemed to like him. I had repressed the memory of what happened to me and didn’t want to have to relive the embarrassment and guilt that came along with it. I figured she would get the ick soon like she usually did and stop seeing him before it turned into anything serious. I know this was a mistake but at the time I didn’t want to tell anyone about what had happened to me.
That didn’t happen, after two months I realized I had messed up by not initially telling her that I was uncomfortable with her dating him. When I finally told her that he had raped me when I was 19 and the entire situation about the beach and the trauma it put me through she said she didn’t believe it was rape because we were both drinking. She said she was going to continue to date him and that I should have said something before she started to like him.
Now they’ve been together for a year. I’ve told my entire family what happened and that if he is allowed to be welcomed into the family I won’t be apart of it because I don’t want to spend the rest of my life at family functions with my rapist. For a while my family was understanding and didn’t ever meet him. I moved to a new state and haven’t talked to my sister in a year because she is dating him, when we used to talk daily.
This week I found out my parents have been playing pickle ball with my my sister and Kyle and I spent hours crying. I feel like I’m losing my family to my rapist.
My question is am I over reacting by saying I don’t want my family in my life if they allow him into theirs? I feel guilty, like I’m making my sister lose out on happiness or making my parents choose between their two daughters. I don’t know what to do to make them believe me, because I feel like if they did they wouldn’t be hanging out with him. I’m not sure where to go from here.
Am I crazy for not wanting this guy to be apart of my family? What would you all do in this situation? How do I make my family believe what happened to me and not whatever story my sister is telling them?
Does giving my family an ultimatum that if he’s in their life I won’t be make me an asshole? I’m considering filing a police report so my family understands how serious what happened is and to protect my sister, and other women from a bad person. What do you all think?
submitted by confusedgirl207 to Advice [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:33 TheMailNeverFails Student Loan repayment discrepancies

Hi all. I'm on the verge of paying of my student loan (Finally) but as my estimated final payment looms closer, I've noticed that it's always a few more paychecks away.
Looking at MyIR, I can see fortnightly deductions to the balance coinciding with my fortnightly pay, however, at least 4 times over the last 12 months, I can see that there has been a period of around 4 weeks between payments.
As my employee takes care of my tax and SL obligations, and as I'm essentially on a salary, (I get the some wages every week whether I do my 40 hours or less), I can't see how there could be payments missing.
They aren't always listed for the same day as my pay day, but are usually within the next 2-3 days. In saying that though, looking at MyIR, I can see a payment for the 4th of April, then the next one on the 2nd of May. There should have been one in between these two dates as the amount is always the same percentage of my fortnightly wage. As I said before, this discrepancy occurs at least 4 times over the last 12 months.
Considering my balance is under $1000 now, would IRD not have a problem with this?
I'm really looking forward to the increased spending money that having my SL paid off will afford me, but having to wait another 2 months (at least) is kinda shit.
Are there other factors at play that could result in this infrequent payment schedule? I feel like if I ask my boss, he's going to tell me it all goes through automatically.
This isn't the only red-flag in my employment so I'm going to be skeptical regardless what he says. I just want to be sure I have my facts right first.
Cheers
submitted by TheMailNeverFails to PersonalFinanceNZ [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:32 KillerKayleigh283 Im struggling with whatever it is im feeling....

Hi all, i will try to describe how i feel as best as i can, but to be honest, i dont really know what it is. This may be a little long because i have to add context to describe a few things. I was diagnosed with BPD, PTDS, Anxiety and OCD about 5 years ago
I am 38F, my partner of 9 years is 34M. The relationship is rather rocky at times, but for the most part we work through it. Ive had some CBT to help control my emotional reactions, which worked really well, but i think y partner also needs the same thing, as when he gets mad, he doesnt just talk things through, he has a very nasty tongue. I wont go into some of the things hes said because they would immediately create a profile for him and i wont get non-biased opinions in here because everyone is likely to just hate him. I also used to have a nasty tongue but my CBT gave me the means to have a lot of self control, so i havent been like that for years.
Thing is, my partner and I live together, but we barely do anything. last thing we did was visit a waterpark for his birthday, thats all we've done in 2024. small things like a 2 hour comedy show then straight home to bed (and no time spent together before that either) happen sometimes, or we sit at home watching a tv series or playing a videogame, but that isnt often either.
Now heres my issue with my feelings, all the above in mind, we had a bad fight 10 days ago and he said some really hurtful things, also refused to apologise because it was my fault for 'winding him up' (i was correcting where he told me things i did during the day, that he didnt even see, but obv i did because its me) by being argumentative. So my feelings shut off completely, i was numb to him emotionally, both happy and sad. he has since apologised and promised to get therapy, but hasnt done any of it yet. Im still rather withdrawn, but open enough to sleep with him last night, however kissing him felt rather forced. Today he is out with his friends like he does once a week and i HATE it. He's gone for a full 12 hours every time he goes, its a 1 hour drive there and 1 hour back, so i guess a long day makes the driving and petrol cost worth it. but i just hate that hes going there and whats worse, it sounds real fun because theres BBQ on. I feel really negative about this whole thing but i dont know what it is. i dont want to stop him having fun, but i dont want him to go either. at the same time, after what keeps happening (the arguments are about 1 every 6 weeks and they hurt my heart like hell!) i dont even want him to spend time with me. if he asked me now id say yes just to be polite but tbh i dont know what i even want. the last few times we had bigger plans than watching stuff on tv, we argued so he cancelled. i had to host a family bbq 9 days ago which we were both excited about but we fought so i had to do alone, he decided last minute before everyone arrived, to come and help me but only because i practically begged. He drives and i dont, so also during this fight he dropped me off to collect my son from school then drove off and left me there (its an hour walk, or 2 seperate buses). (i told my son i got the bus because the car was broke, we are good at keeping civil when my son is around, i cant exactly fault partner for that)
But yeah, what the hell is this feeling i have? i resent partner for all this bad crap, esp recently because a lot happened over 10 days, but over the years ive been promised change and hes finally saying he will accept therapy (though hasnt even got on the list yet). Im jealous (i think) that hes out doing all this cool stuff with his friends, but i dont want him here doing things with me anyway. (there are times we've had fights because i was sick and asked him to stay instead of going to friends and he screamed at me, then went anyway, after id just spent 2 days taking care of him). am i wrong for feeling this way? i dont want to be accused of bringing up the past (the sick thing was back in feb) but i think all these things are painting a really bad picture of him in my head and i dont know what to do. leaving him isnt really an option right now as i need his half of the rent and bills in order to be able to afford to live here, plus, i actually dont want him gone....for some reason.
im so confused......
submitted by KillerKayleigh283 to BPD [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:29 goalinsight Moving from CA to NC

Hello!
My family and I are relocating to North Carolina in June. We are going to be driving one moving van (towing one car) and also driving another car separate.
Curious as to if anyone has advice on what route to take? We are coming from Northern CA (above San Francisco) and are wanting to finish the trip before 10 days. We are open to sight seeing but it’s not really ideal with all that we are moving.
I was leaning towards the southern I-40 route due to it being flatter - but thought the northern route would be cooler (we’re traveling with our two dogs and two cats).
Any input on which route to take would be appreciated - we live in a beautiful country and there truly is so much to see.
submitted by goalinsight to roadtrip [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:29 Virtual_Worth_921 17m need some friends i’m lonely :( i’m slow at responding on reddit but maybe we can exchange numbers or snaps?

hey there i’m 17 and my name is tyson i have very little friends all of which are online and i just dropped one of them that i used to talk to all day because they told me to kill myself and i don’t fw that a little about me is i’m a nomad at heart i only feel happy while traveling whether it’s with my backpack and guitar or in a car another thing i like is working like a job i also love to spend time in nature which doesn’t always workout as a vagabond but when it does it’s amazing bonfires on the beach accompanied by the stars i plan on making my next hitchhiking trip in around a month or two unless i find a job before then which i doubt i will since i don’t have a diploma i plan on getting my ged as soon as i turn 18 so i can get a job and move into a bus or van shortly after anyways if i interest you hit me up!! it might take a little to respond since i don’t have notifications for reddit but i hope we can switch to texting over imessage or snap
submitted by Virtual_Worth_921 to MeetNewPeopleHere [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:28 confusedgirl207 AITAH for filing a police report on my sisters boyfriend

When I (28F) was 19 and a freshman in college I went to the beach with some friends for spring break. We were staying in a hotel and one day we chose to spend the day drinking at the pool there and grilling, another group of people that some of the guys I was there with knew was also at the pool. I didn’t know the guys in the other group before that day but we were all hanging out by the pool.
That night I had more drinks than I should have and don’t recall how the situation happened but I woke up in the other guys room that 4 of them were staying in. I felt uneasy and like something bad had happened.
Later that next day I was at the beach with my friends and a girl I knew came up to me asking if I was okay. I was confused, I didn’t know what she was referring to, so I asked what she meant. She proceeded to take out her phone and show me a video where one of the guys I met the day before, Kyle (now 27M) on top of me having sex. I was not participating. I was lying there not moving while he was thrusting on top of me.
Kyles friends were all in the room watching it happen and one of them recorded it and sent it to a ton of people that I knew. I don’t remember any of this happening. I felt embarrassed and ashamed and tried to brush it off initially. I didn’t want to play victim because we had both been drinking, he had less than I did, and I had put myself into that situation.
I don’t believe there is any way I would have consented to this. The last thing I remember from the night was talking to one of the guys I had gone to the beach with who I had a crush on (not Kyle). He had tried to kiss me and I remember telling him no because I knew we were both drunk and I didn’t want to do anything I might regret the next day.
A few months later I began hanging out with Kyle and we had sex a few more times, it made me feel less guilty about the situation and I felt like I was in control because if I chose to do it now maybe I had chosen to do it during spring break when I was so drunk I wasn’t conscious.
I tried to push what happened to the back of my mind because forgetting about it was easier than dealing with it. I went back to the same beach with my sister Rachel about 2 years later and Kyle was there again. I was hanging out with my own friends and I happened to be walking by when I heard him scream in front of a group of people that he loved my sister. I began sobbing and just started walking down the beach alone crying unsure of why I was even crying at the time. My sister and I were supposed to stay at the beach for two more days after this one but that night I told her that I needed to go home and couldn’t be there anymore so we packed up and left. My sister was furious and I spent the entire car ride home crying. This was the only big fight we had ever had and we didn’t talk for a week.
Fast forward a few years and I had moved on from this situation, I saw Kyle around town occasionally because we lived in a small town but I was in a new relationship and happy. Then my sister came to me and told me that she and Kyle had started to go on a few dates. At first I didn’t know what to say, she seemed to like him. I had repressed the memory of what happened to me and didn’t want to have to relive the embarrassment and guilt that came along with it. I figured she would get the ick soon like she usually did and stop seeing him before it turned into anything serious. I know this was a mistake but at the time I didn’t want to tell anyone about what had happened to me.
That didn’t happen, after two months I realized I had messed up by not initially telling her that I was uncomfortable with her dating him. When I finally told her that he had raped me when I was 19 and the entire situation about the beach and the trauma it put me through she said she didn’t believe it was rape because we were both drinking. She said she was going to continue to date him and that I should have said something before she started to like him.
Now they’ve been together for a year. I’ve told my entire family what happened and that if he is allowed to be welcomed into the family I won’t be apart of it because I don’t want to spend the rest of my life at family functions with my rapist. For a while my family was understanding and didn’t ever meet him. I moved to a new state and haven’t talked to my sister in a year because she is dating him, when we used to talk daily.
This week I found out my parents have been playing pickle ball with my my sister and Kyle and I spent hours crying. I feel like I’m losing my family to my rapist.
My question is am I over reacting by saying I don’t want my family in my life if they allow him into theirs? I feel guilty, like I’m making my sister lose out on happiness or making my parents choose between their two daughters. I don’t know what to do to make them believe me, because I feel like if they did they wouldn’t be hanging out with him. I’m not sure where to go from here.
Does giving my family an ultimatum that if he’s in their life I won’t be make me an asshole? I’m considering filing a police report so my family understands how serious what happened is and to protect my sister, and other women from a bad person. What do you all think?
submitted by confusedgirl207 to AITAH [link] [comments]

2024.05.19 20:27 Fine-Historian4018 Retirement savings versus cash savings

At what point does it make sense to take on debt to ensure you are maxing retirement savings?
For instance, I will probably have to replace my car in 5 years. I could save the money in a HYSA over the next 5 years and pay cash or I could put that amount in retirement and just take out an auto loan when the time comes?
If the stock market earns 10% per year and savings account yields 5% and the car debt is 5%. It seems to be a better idea financially to just put it in retirement and take on a loan when I go to purchase right?
submitted by Fine-Historian4018 to personalfinance [link] [comments]

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