Funny raps for my boyfriend

(Im sorry if my english is bad) For starters me (19M) and my best friend (18M) have known eachother since birth. We are both in a friend group that resulted from all of our parents being friends with eachother. The group consists of us two, another guy (19M) and two girls (18F) and (19F). We all grew up very close in Russia, however I am ukrainian. We went to school together, went on vacations together and generally were all doing everything together. Not long ago, when picking out collages, my best friend was telling me about how he wishes he could stay in Russia and how he cant because of some reasons I will not share here, and so naturally I offered that I could go to college with him in another country. Fast forward a few months later we both got into a pretty good collage in Finland. Now about our backround basically my best friend is very close with one of the girls in the group but they both stated that they do not like eachother and if you ask me, they didnt seem to have any kind of spark between eachother. However he was also very close to the other guy in the group. By close I mean that they literally acted like a couple. Whenever we would have school summer camps they would share a bed and sometimes I would even catch them cuddle, they would hug a lot etc. and generally make a lot of jokes about being gay for eachoter and liking eachother. You should know that my best friend is extremely handsome, I mean like model handsome. He is tall, not too muscular and not too skinny, pale skin, green eyes, soft blonde hair and very beautiful features. He looks so beautiful from every single angle, he looks beautiful while he sleeps, when he laughs, when he cries and is probably the most beautiful person I have ever met in my entire life. Despite that, he has never been in a relationship. A lot of girls have liked him in the past but he rejected them and he is pretty popular on social media and gets praised for his looks online as well. Aside from his looks he is also very smart. He is passionated about history and linguistics, he is good at maths and in general he is a very cultured person. He is very kind, funny, loving and has this sensitive side that he doesnt show too often. He just lights up the room everytime even though he is not that kind of positive and happy person you would imagine. He has gone through a lot in his childhood, things that I will not mention. On his 18th birthday, some things happened and I was lucky enough to be in time to stop them, which resulted into him bursting in tears in my arms and telling me how he feels about his life. A lot of time has passed since that event. Now we share an apartament here in Finland and go to college together. He seems happier, or maybe since he doesn’t spend that much time alone anymore he is just distracting himself from all the things he was going through. It is currently risky for me to go back in my home country and so I usually just go to Russia together with him on holidays. I am really enjoying all the time spent with him and I have never felt happier for such a long period of time. Recently he started hanging out with another guy from the same college and not going to lie but I feel kind of jealous. Since then I started to question my feelings for him. I never pictured myself or him actually being gay, let alone together in a relationship. I feel scared and nervous. My mother and her boyfriend will definitely hate me more than they already do and my father will probably think Im a disappointment. I feel as if I am betraying my religion and my identity but at the same time I feel so happy with this man. And here comes the biggest problem of all, what if after all he isnt gay and I will ruin our friendship. Yesterday night he went over to the new guys house.The guy likes him, he told me, asking for advice and more things about my best friend. I was kind of mad that I didnt get invited too, especially when he knows how close we are. Before going, I acted kind of rude towards him, which I regret, but he brushed it off and just left. Later at night when he came home, I was already in bed, pretending to sleep. I heard him change and get straight into his bed. A few moments later he started crying. He was crying very badly and I could tell he was trying to keep quiet. I dont know if anything happened there or if he was crying about my response or about his past because I simply didnt get up or have any kind of reaction, which again, I regret. I tried talking to him today in the morning, I didnt tell him I heard how he cried, I just acted normal, and although he wasnt his usual self, he didnt act sad or anything. I dont know wether I should or should not ask him about last night. And most importantly I dont know if I should tell him about my feelings for him and explain the situation.

We are in a LDR. He made a friend in the gym that I go to, and this friend thought he saw me in the gym with another guy, cheating on him. This so called “friend” texted him saying that he saw me in the gym so he started asking asking me if I went to the gym that day what did I do etc. etc. Basically I didn’t go to the gym that day so it was quite easy to figure out that it wasn’t me. Obviously I got super upset and I told him that I was gonna talk to this guy because it was an enormous breach of privacy and I felt really uncomfortable, because going to the gym is something that is very socially awkward for me, so I wanted to talk to him and tell him that if he wants to make accusations like that, he need to be absolutely sure because he could’ve created such an uncomfortable situation and for example, if I was in a more toxic relationship, it could’ve been really hurtful and it could’ve ruined the relationship in a situation that it wasn’t even me. When I told him that I was going to speak to him he basically got super defensive and told me that he was just being a good guy and he wanted to protect him and that he did the right thing because that’s what guys do and stuff like that. My anger escalated because I did not feel protected at all so yeah, I was going to text him. I found this guy socials and I was going to text him an angry message basically saying for him to mind his business. when he realized that I was going to do this he basically said that it was all a joke, which is awful and obviously I didn’t believe it so I made him swear and for us, at least I thought so, when we swear on something its a word that we really value in our relationship and whenever we say, I swear that this didn’t happen, we believe it. he made up that it was an April fools joke and stuff like that because he swore on it, I believed it. today I went to the gym and I saw the guy and my intuition kicked in because I just knew that the story wasn’t adding up, so I went to speak to him jokingly and I told him how it wasn’t so funny when you mistaken me for someone else and his friend basically told me the entire story.. yes he did text him, and my boyfriend went to the extent of sending him a picture of me for him to actually be sure if it was me or not, which means he never trusted me. Never trusted my word and he straight up lied to me. I called him and basically asked how did you lie to me so easily and he basically said that it wasn’t a lie he just forgot to tell me the truth.
How am I supposed to ever trust his word again? Should I break up over this. We’ve been together for 3 years, I’m completely at a loss.

I'm not sure if I'm allowed to post here because I'm not married. But my boyfriend's mother is a psychopath with control issues who is sick in the head. When I was over at his house a few months ago she was in the middle of yelling at my boyfriend for his bad grades (he's a college student) and I snickered a little because she was behaving like a clown. When she noticed that I laughed, she said "oh you think this is funny?!" and then screamed at me to get out of her house. I tried to leave but she grabbed me by the arm and pulled me back inside and closed the door behind me, continued to scream at me, and started lecturing me about how I am a bad influence on her son. I told her "don't touch me" and left. The next day she sent me a text saying I was disrespectful to her and she asked for an apology.
A little later in the semester, my boyfriend asked me for help moving some things to his dorm room so I agreed and I drove to his house. He put a few bags full of his things in my car, and I waited while he went back inside to get more. Then he called me and said his mother is coming to take his stuff out of my car. Apparently his mother said that I'm a manipulative person and that I manipulated her son into going to his dorm room (which is not true, he asked for my help.) So my boyfriend just said I should drive to his dorm, and I did, but his parents got in their car and started following me. His stepdad was driving and his mom was in the passenger seat. I tried to lose them by driving around their neighborhood and into a grocery store parking lot. But his stepdad cornered me in the parking lot and tried to block my car in so that I couldn't leave. I was so terrified when his mother got out of her car and started banging on my window and trying to open my door. I pulled out my phone and started recording. Finally I managed to get away and I drove to his dorm room.
When I was at my boyfriend's dorm, I called the police and explained what happened. I filed a police report later that night and I added the video of his mom to my case. The officer's advice was to file a restraining order, which I have not done yet but I sent sent both of his parents a very long text establishing some boundaries.
I've been called worse things by his family besides "manipulative" such as "bitch", "fucked in the head", etc. For extra context, I am a black woman and my boyfriend & his family are white.

For context i am still young and have many years ahead of me but i just have never been able to find love. I used to think no guys like me because of my looks but men call me hot so I knew it wasn’t that . I thought maybe it was my personality but many men have told me I’m funny and nice to talk to so what is it about me that just makes me so unlovable that makes me the second choice that makes me not enough. I think the only downside about me is I don’t wanna have sex, but I didn’t think that we must have a problem until I tried to find a boyfriend and it seems like whenever I tell him I don’t wanna get physical. That’s the problem, i’m still young. I just don’t know if I’m ready for that yet but is not having sex really that big of a deal breaker it’s not that i never wanna do it just not rn. I know this sounds very depressing. I’m not trying to be, but if anyone has some advice on trying to put myself out there or something that be great or if anyone relates to this it would be good to see that i’m not alone lol.

(Im sorry if my english is bad) For starters me (19M) and my best friend (18M) have known eachother since birth. We are both in a friend group that resulted from all of our parents being friends with eachother. The group consists of us two, another guy (19M) and two girls (18F) and (19F). We all grew up very close in Russia, however I am ukrainian. We went to school together, went on vacations together and generally were all doing everything together. Not long ago, when picking out collages, my best friend was telling me about how he wishes he could stay in Russia and how he cant because of some reasons I will not share here, and so naturally I offered that I could go to college with him in another country. Fast forward a few months later we both got into a pretty good collage in Finland. Now about our backround basically my best friend is very close with one of the girls in the group but they both stated that they do not like eachother and if you ask me, they didnt seem to have any kind of spark between eachother. However he was also very close to the other guy in the group. By close I mean that they literally acted like a couple. Whenever we would have school summer camps they would share a bed and sometimes I would even catch them cuddle, they would hug a lot etc. and generally make a lot of jokes about being gay for eachoter and liking eachother. You should know that my best friend is extremely handsome, I mean like model handsome. He is tall, not too muscular and not too skinny, pale skin, green eyes, soft blonde hair and very beautiful features. He looks so beautiful from every single angle, he looks beautiful while he sleeps, when he laughs, when he cries and is probably the most beautiful person I have ever met in my entire life. Despite that, he has never been in a relationship. A lot of girls have liked him in the past but he rejected them and he is pretty popular on social media and gets praised for his looks online as well. Aside from his looks he is also very smart. He is passionated about history and linguistics, he is good at maths and in general he is a very cultured person. He is very kind, funny, loving and has this sensitive side that he doesnt show too often. He just lights up the room everytime even though he is not that kind of positive and happy person you would imagine. He has gone through a lot in his childhood, things that I will not mention. On his 18th birthday, some things happened and I was lucky enough to be in time to stop them, which resulted into him bursting in tears in my arms and telling me how he feels about his life. A lot of time has passed since that event. Now we share an apartament here in Finland and go to college together. He seems happier, or maybe since he doesn’t spend that much time alone anymore he is just distracting himself from all the things he was going through. It is currently risky for me to go back in my home country and so I usually just go to Russia together with him on holidays. I am really enjoying all the time spent with him and I have never felt happier for such a long period of time. Recently he started hanging out with another guy from the same college and not going to lie but I feel kind of jealous. Since then I started to question my feelings for him. I never pictured myself or him actually being gay, let alone together in a relationship. I feel scared and nervous. My mother and her boyfriend will definitely hate me more than they already do and my father will probably think Im a disappointment. I feel as if I am betraying my religion and my identity but at the same time I feel so happy with this man. And here comes the biggest problem of all, what if after all he isnt gay and I will ruin our friendship. Yesterday night he went over to the new guys house.The guy likes him, he told me, asking for advice and more things about my best friend. I was kind of mad that I didnt get invited too, especially when he knows how close we are. Before going, I acted kind of rude towards him, which I regret, but he brushed it off and just left. Later at night when he came home, I was already in bed, pretending to sleep. I heard him change and get straight into his bed. A few moments later he started crying. He was crying very badly and I could tell he was trying to keep quiet. I dont know if anything happened there or if he was crying about my response or about his past because I simply didnt get up or have any kind of reaction, which again, I regret. I tried talking to him today in the morning, I didnt tell him I heard how he cried, I just acted normal, and although he wasnt his usual self, he didnt act sad or anything. I dont know wether I should or should not ask him about last night. And most importantly I dont know if I should tell him about my feelings for him and explain the situation.

I (23F) have a boyfriend (24M) for almost 1 and a half years. He is my first relationship (a bit late since I never explicitly wanted to be in a relationship before because I thought I could work more on myself) while I'm his second. He had a messy relationship before and used to vent to me, I acknowledged him as my other brother (typical in Korean culture) and genuinely saw him that way, so I tried to be neutral and gave really basic advice because I didn't want to be any part of this and more because I was hearing things from his side and I didn't know the girl and she could be right too.
Fast forward to a few months, they keep getting together and breaking up and finally, they do it for real and he has a crush on another girl. He went out with her once, like lunch or something and she told him she has a situationship with someone else but they remained friends.
Later that year we had a group trip among our friends and we grew close and kinda caught feelings. He seemed passionate about me and expressed that he loved me already (too soon if I'm honest), I really enjoyed having him as my best friend and didn't mind dating him and in fact I reciprocated his feelings and we started dating.
With time he started being weird like when we are at class (we attend the same uni) and we are talking and someone calls me, and I look to reply to them and answer their question and return back to our conversation, he gets mad at me and refuses to talk to me like I did something bad. It was a big red flag and I tried to explain how that was really awful and when I tried to mildly get back at him like when he's not listening to me, I'd jokingly say don't talk to me you always do the same when I don't listen and he'd never even entertain me and would get mad. And me explaining how we shouldn't just be fighting over stupid things is just a waste of time, he'd never try to even understand.
Eventually, he gets it and stops doing it. With time I felt really unloved in the relationship as he rarely complimented me or said that he loved me and I had to initiate it, in fact, he stopped replying to them with a love you too or you're cute or something in general. In fact, my man here previously told me how he feels uncomfortable having female friends, so I never had any fear or even thought of him talking to other girls. Having friends who are girls is fine, but hiding that is weird. Plus whenever we joked about exes or people who liked us, he always used to say that he doesn't even talk with that girl.
So here are those instances:
When I'm on my phone beside him he jokingly presses on buttons and also views different chats especially if it's with a guy and jokes about sending something stupid. Now I never even thought of doing that to someone but he once left me with his phone and I was gonna do something like that and while finding a chat I clicked on one accidentally. It was the same girl he had a crush on before, and he is still talking to her, sadly he has been sending the same jokes and messages to her (nothing romantic explicitly) but everything is like any joke he told me, he told her and also was that he met her. My man always told me everything about his day but hid this which was like why do you tell me everything except this, meaning you want to hide it? I never even asked him about his day in detail like that. I tried to be rational and tried not to react as he never handled me saying anything I didn't like, nicely and I didn't want to fight. I wanted to be sure and this time I saw another girl WHOM I NEVER EVEN KNEW ABOUT. The girl was sick so he even went to the house to give her food and my man doesn't even check twice when I am sick. And he beautifully kept that part out of his narration of his days. I peacefully confronted him about it the first time I saw the texts accidentally. He denied it all and I tried to not have a bigger fight.
Later one day I was called to his place to finish the work that he had due and couldn't do himself, I came to help while he showered and on his laptop, the girl's text kept coming in, they talked about what kind of partners they wanted, they went out for walks many times and all this time he told me that he was sleeping or was out alone, the LIES. I was so mad but I finished the work and we went to print his assignment and later I ended up confronting him. He denied and gaslit me in believing he didn't even do any of that. Plus both the girls and he had profile pictures he drew for himself and them, mind you I don't have one.
I went home and the next I confronted him again and he finally said that she is just a friend and since he lives alone she's the only one who doesn't drink or smoke like him hence he goes on walks with her. He was paranoid from his previous relationship that I would get mad and that's why he didn't tell me. I was like when did I say that and the hiding makes what he's doing wrong like he knows it but still is hiding it. My man also doesn't even consider them friends like bro what are they then?
ANYWAYS, he apologizes and kinda makes me feel bad by saying he won't have any friends at all like I caught you lying???? He says he won't do it anymore and he just hung out with them. I forgive him.
We had small stupid fights about him not talking enough when I saw him texting so nicely with them and all.
Fast forward to almost when we were done with a year, I caught him drawing his previously mentioned crush on class and then got mad I got mad at him for drawing him and also yelled at me like I never even raised my voice. He with his mouth told that he only draws people he loves. And felt valid being mad like you see her story and take a screenshot and start drawing her what??? We fought, and he threatened to break up which he does always like I'm the problem.
Then he apologized and we went back to normal and then we maybe had a few fights in between, it was mostly us being frustrated with work but then last week I saw him always clutch his phone when I'm grabbing something next to it, comically exactly like those unfaithful bf tiktoks lmao. This bothered me a lot like what is it hide, to have no fights, I reassured him that you don't have to hide having friends.
Now some days later we went on a date and he was like distracted once in a while to check his phone or try to check messages but when I looked he was pulling down the notification bar (where he has the message app muted you can't see anything). I was trying to brush it off, but then we decided to head home and I was like let's go to your place, we can watch a movie or something, he said his rent owner doesn't allow anyone because last day his friends caused a ruckus. Valid but his friends have been coming to his place for the past 4 days and when I asked if I wanted to go, even in the daytime, he had something to say. Maybe that is the truth but he adds we can sneak you in, I felt a bit desperate to agree to that so I said no and refused to be dropped by him at my home. He realized I was mad and left me, something I never even do to him but okay, I broke down and started having a mental breakdown and having no one, I decided to call him back to vent, which is something I never do because venting to him or anyone never makes me feel validated.
I know how you can make friends feel heard if not good when they have to let something out and at the moment no one around me does that at the moment which is fine like no one should be giving me therapy or something. Anyway, I was crying and he said he'd listen and not get mad I explained to him that being secretive makes me feel weird and what is to hide leading to a conversation where I asked him to show the texts. He denies which is weird so after a lot of pressing like if you don't show it agree that you're hiding something, he shows it. My man was singing her songs and she was too while he told me he would sleep, at 3 am and is calling her voice cute like it's so hard to get called cute as his girlfriend like wtf. I was like bitch wtf it's over but my low self-esteem ass wanted to fix stuff. I go home and beg him to talk and after lots of begging we talk, he first invalidates me then I break down and admit that he is wrong. This somehow leads to him having a full-blown mental breakdown of crying and throwing up and I feel bad.
Things got better then and we were normal, we'd move away after a while so really wanted to hang out at his place but he never said it himself anymore which he used to do it all the time before. This makes me sad, anyways he keeps making me feel bad saying always blame him, LIKE YOU DID THOSE THINGS TF? I was tired of that, and he started a fight saying I always blame him when I just said that I have been wanting to come to his place and you don't tell me to come by yourself, it always you can if you want to, you will have to sneak in. Liken it always felt like it was all from my side so although I tried to understand him, I told him again that I wanna hang out at his place like the desperate idiot I am, and after his same reply, I said it feels like you don't want it and he said I'm again blaming him. This was still funny banter until he started yelling again. Like just refused to listen like I did something.
So here is where I stand now. I am someone who tries to maintain a healthy relationship and can leave when things go bad but since my self-esteem is so low I end up staying with him. He isn't a good boyfriend I know it, but maybe I'm too stupid and this is what I deserve. He is way cool and prettier and seems to be beyond my league sometimes and the girls he talks to are so much prettier but I just can't. I keep forgiving him and it's so stupid. I don't know what to do or how to start to leave. What should be the exit plan if needed? And the reason why I wrote this, many times I just feel like, I am the asshole.

So I had a boyfriend when I was young he was insanely manipulative, emotionally wrecked me that I still have issues,groomed me. He was a horrible boyfriend to me cheated twice (that I know of)and didn't even apologized. I wasn't able to leave him as I had attachment issues and he was my first boyfriend. He didn't even cared for me at all. But I thought everything will get better and stayed.Atp I am not even sure that I was his gf or side chick. But he ended up passing away. I was very sad cried for months and thought he was my love forgetting things he did to me. After months of him passing i realised I was in unhealthy relationship and not even real relationship. A guy who loved you would never disrespect you like that. But now if anyone bring up his name they associate me with him. They all know me as that girl who lost her bf. I don't want to be associated at all to him. People show unnecessary pity which I hate. I tried telling someone but they said then why did you cry. I just want to leave this place and want everyone to forget about this , I can not live my life being associated to him. I want nothing to do with him. I feel so suffocated whenever someone mentions him I feel mixed feelings and it's painful. He didn't deserve what happened to him. I wish he was alive so i could atleast hate him freely. But now I feel guilty for feeling that way. I wish he rest in peace but i don't want to remember him at all because there is nothing good to remember. It's funny that everyone even his friends knew that I was mistreated but no one want to say it explicitly because he is not more. No one understands me and I feel like screaming but I can't and I feel suffocated.

So, I (18F) just turned 18, and now I'm facing a major life decision. My parents are dead set on me going to college (which is understandable), but specifically in Canada. I want to work and earn my bachelor's online while renting a place out with my boyfriend. I currently live in northwest America and am doing a dual credit program at my local community college. I'm graduating next month, and have until September to decide on wtf im going to do with my life. I've already applied to Windsor, York, and Lakehead, and have been accepted to all three. My parents are interested in Canada mainly because my dad is from there, and everyone on his side of the family lives there. Also, it's cheaper than an American university would be, and my grandma left 20,000 USD for my education. My mom is very anti-America and reads lots of fear-mongering articles, she genuinely believes there is going to be a war or an apocalypse here and that moving to Canada is better for our "safety". These reasons make it nearly impossible to convince my parents to stay here and study. I've tried to reason with them, explaining my plan and why I think it would be better for my mental health and my future. But they are stuck on a mindset that earning an online degree won't get me a real job and I'll end up working at McDonalds. They always use my uncle as an example of what I don't want to be like, which is funny because he got his degree in person. My parents are all about the "college experience" you know, making friends, living on campus, etc. I actually have no idea what I'm going to do, because I am terrified to go to another country alone. I also don't think I can convince my parents otherwise, and I just feel greedy and selfish for not wanting to go especially since they offered to pay for it all. Help lol.

I have never made a post on Reddit before so bear with me. Two days ago I feel like I made the hardest decision of my life when choosing to break up with my boyfriend. I love this boy so much but I became so unhappy in the relationship. I would constantly bring up the same issues over and over again and I got so tired of feeling like I always had a problem. He was always good about listening but I feel as if he didn’t really hear it if that makes any sense. However, I also know that I am going through a lot of changes right now because I am graduating college and heading into the adult world. I feel like I was constantly getting annoyed at him over the small things and then I would be mean. I think that was the worst part for me because I absolutely hated snapping at him for no reason because I know he didn’t deserve it and I love him and didn’t want to constantly be mean or angry. Even with these issues I know we love each other and really do care but I just couldn’t do it anymore. So two days ago I broke up with him. Later that day after breaking up we messaged back and forth talking about where it went wrong and he admitted that he messed up and should have showed that he cared better. I also admitted to my wrongs as well because I know neither of us are perfect and I don’t expect us to be. However, now he is begging for me back and that he will do better and listen to me but I just don’t know if I can take him back. I truly love him and have been in the worst pain of my life but I know if I take him back and he doesn’t change then I will be even more devastated. I want to ask him to maybe wait until after the summer to reach out to try again if we both still want to but he wants to get back together now which I understand too. My suggestion to hime was to not be together for the summer and not be exclusive. I know I want those months to work on loving myself and figuring out my new job and life. With this I do understand that one or either of us can do whatever we want and when the time comes one or both of us may not want to get back together which is terrifying but then I know it wasn’t meant to be. I would love to get back together now but I feel like we both need time to work on ourselves and I feel like he needs time to really know if he wants to be with me and make the changes or not. All I have been asking this boy for is communication when he is not with me (I constantly communicate when I’m out but he does not show the same respect with communication when he is out), to plan dates so it isn’t just me planning, and for flowers once a month. I know I haven’t written a lot about all the good but I promise he is so kind and sweet and funny and he understands me. We are both weird and love each other quirks and are happy to just be in each others presence. I truly love this boy with all my heart but I don’t think I can take him back yet. I feel like we both need time to work on ourselves but then I’m also so scared to lose him completely in the process. We have been together for almost two years and when he came back begging I realized I don’t think I want to give up on us yet completely. However, I don’t just want to take him back because I feel bad or am lonely. I don’t know what to do and am just looking for some advice.

Obligatory apologies for any weird formatting, I'm on mobile.
TLDR; I'm in a new relationship (27F and 33M) and need help learning how to identify boundaries, my autism is a complicating factor.
So I (27F) have been dating my boyfriend J (33M) for about 3 months. We met online but have been seeing each other in person at minimum once a week, generally more often. Sleepovers, met the family, all of that. He's kind, supportive, funny, smart, and he never asks me to be anyone but myself. We've said "I love you", agreed we're dating, and have plans to move in together at some point in the future (months from now). We've also had a talk previously about what we want our relationship to look like, and agreed to keep it an ongoing conversation which is where my question comes in.
Historically, I haven't been allowed to express boundaries with my exes. He's had the same issues, so we're trying to be very clear with each other. I've been able to communicate well about my sexual boundaries, but here's where the issue comes in: we've both agreed we don't particularly care about sleeping with other people as long as we're practicing safe sex (condoms, etc) and we don't prioritize hookups over our relationship. However, I know that I'd be upset if he got romantically close to someone else and he asked me to think about what that looks like for me - at what point (in my eyes) does something shift from platonic to romantic? Obviously I don't want to stop him from having friends and I don't care what gender they are.
How do I pick that apart and find where my individual boundaries are? Has anyone been in a similar situation? I love him so much and I want this to work, I don't want my inability to figure out my own boundaries to be an issue. We're both autistic so going by if there's a romantic "vibe" or not isn't going to work well long term - we don't pick up on that easily.
Any advice or commiseration at all would be welcome. Thanks in advance!

So, I (18F) just turned 18, and now I'm facing a major life decision. My parents are dead set on me going to college (which is understandable), but specifically in Canada. I want to work and earn my bachelor's online while renting a place out with my boyfriend. I currently live in northwest America and am doing a dual credit program at my local community college. I'm graduating next month, and have until September to decide on wtf im going to do with my life. I've already applied to Windsor, York, and Lakehead, and have been accepted to all three. My parents are interested in Canada mainly because my dad is from there, and everyone on his side of the family lives there. Also, it's cheaper than an American university would be, and my grandma left 20,000 USD for my education. My mom is very anti-America and reads lots of fear-mongering articles, she genuinely believes there is going to be a war or an apocalypse here and that moving to Canada is better for our "safety". These reasons make it nearly impossible to convince my parents to stay here and study. I've tried to reason with them, explaining my plan and why I think it would be better for my mental health and my future. But they are stuck on a mindset that earning an online degree won't get me a real job and I'll end up working at McDonalds. They always use my uncle as an example of what I don't want to be like, which is funny because he got his degree in person. My parents are all about the "college experience" you know, making friends, living on campus, etc. I actually have no idea what I'm going to do, because I am terrified to go to another country alone. I also don't think I can convince my parents otherwise, and I just feel greedy and selfish for not wanting to go especially since they offered to pay for it all. Help lol.

Hello! idk where can i ask this, but can i file a case against someone for harassment?
Just today, my friend invited me magsimba then i said yes para samahan sya magsindi since finals nya this week. After that, we went to arcade and played then decided mag coffee shop.
This friend of mine has a bf na may ayaw sa’kin (7 years na kaming friends ng kaibigan) and ayaw nya rin sumasama sya sa amin ng circles namin. Every time we are hanging out tumatawag sya at sinusundo talaga sya. Funny, never nya (bf) nga kami binabati kahit hi or hello. Ang bastos nya towards sa amin for no reason!
Going back, when we are on our way sa coffee, he keeps calling my friend. Then pumasok na kami sa cafe museum and i’m the one who also paid. Noong pa order na kami, bumaba ‘yung friend ko kasi ang kulit nga ng bf nya. Umakyat din ‘yung friend ko but minutes later umakyat ‘yung bf nya ang cause a scene! The female employee stopped him na umakyat kasi bawal nga since meron entrance fee. We had a confrontation. Tapos bigla nya lang kinuha ang gamit ng friend ko at kinaladkad ‘yung friend ko. I was so shocked, i called for help sa guard. Then my panic attacks trigger, nakita ko na lang tinutulak ng bf nya sya papasok sa taxi. I couldn’t help but cried kasi he looks like can mvrder someone. And i’m so dead worried sa friend ko.
The employees actually helped me to fix myself, after that nagsumbong ako sa ate nya abt the situation. I know snitching is bad, but come on! safety ng kaibigan ko ang top priority ko.
Her boyfriend also name called me for being a wh0re! Isa lang naman dinate ko. May time rin inawan ng bf nya sya sa gitna ng plaza na cashless. Good thing, i saved her ass to book some grab.
Can i file po ba? i also coordinated with the cafe museum and they are willing naman since may cctv around the area.
P.S. apologies to my grammatical error, i’m still tulala po of what happened.

This is a throw away account because I don’t want anything being traced back to me.
I (21 F) have been dating my bf (22M) for 8 months, things have been good but one sided arguments (me talking to a brick wall) are pretty common. I have an ex (20M) and as much as it pains me to say it he is very much involved here.
For context: I was dating my ex, I will call him D, for a total of 6 months and he treated me well, if I had a problem he would try to understand and he would put in the effort to change and I would do the same. We broke up because he moved away, and we ended on good terms but low/ no contact. When we were together, I told him my heart, body and soul was his. (Which is stupid and naive and weird I know) I guess when you’re young and you think you are in love you say stupid things . When I said that to him I didn’t think I actually meant it, but now here we are and I don’t think my feelings for him have really changed in the slightest. A part of me still loves him and I’m terrified that in the end it will always be him. Maybe it was because he was genuinely my first love and I’ve heard that you never really forget about your first “love” because that person is your first. The separation absolutely broke my heart and it took me a while to get over it, after I was sure I was able to move on I decided to try dating again and this is how I met my current bf, I will call him S, S was good at the start of the relationship. He was kind and funny, and he was supportive of me, however he has his flaws like everyone, and one of those flaws is that he’s very selfish and he likes to turn everything against me. He did not get me a birthday present which was very upsetting and while I don’t expect him to blow all his money on me, just a hand written card literally would have been enough and it would have meant a lot because it was heartfelt. But instead I got nothing. I am constantly having to pay for everything because he decided to quit his job before ensuring he had another one lined up. So he has no money, no savings, no nothing. I found out he was following these only fans girls on social media and liking their stuff while we’ve been together, I tried to confront him and he reacted very poorly and told me that I need to grow up and then he knew them before he met me and that I was stupid and that I was just yapping. He’s very selfish in bed and while I won’t go into detail, I will say that he likes to leave me hanging after he’s done and he doesn’t like to reciprocate what I do for him. He will also go out with his friends without telling me (which I do not care about I’m not his mother) what actually bothers me is that other girls will be there and he does not let me know and I have to find out through his social media, and when I say other girls will be there I don’t mean “it’s one big friend groups and there’s girls in it”I mean it almost looks like he’s on a 2-man. He also likes to make his social media look like he is single and I will ask him to do a trend with me and he will say no because he is “trying to be nonchalant”. Some more information about my ex and my bf: when I was with my ex it was like he was my best friend and we could talk about anything. My boyfriend is not the same and we have the same conversations on repeat everyday and I’m just not as comfortable with him as I was with my ex because of how he responds to my needs, so I find it kind of hard to talk to him about general stuff.
So fast forward to my predicament, because of all this, it’s been building up to a point where I want to leave him. But I do not know how to approach this. D recently contacted me to check up on me and see how I was doing. And while I appreciate him checking up on me I have informed him that I am in a relationship and I am not looking to rekindle anything with him at this point in time. He said he gets it and that he has a girlfriend and I am happy for him and I am glad he’s doing well. But he also keeps inviting me out with just him and I’ve turned him down every time because wtf?? I just say “maybe one day” and change the subject. He also keeps reminiscing on our relationship which is strange because he has a girlfriend. I feel bad for her and I would like to tell her what has been happening but I don’t even know her name I just know what she looks like because he never brings her up.
I respect his relationship so I would never tell him that I still partly have feelings for him. Because I don’t want to come in and ruin anything they may have, if I can even say that he still has an inkling of affection for me. I just feel like I am losing my mind and I feel like a horrible person.
I will not be leaving him for D. Yes sometimes I do miss D and I think about what we could have been if I had just waited and held on a little bit longer. But D is not the reason I am wanting to leave. He is just not a great boyfriend and it isn’t working but I don’t know how to approach it. I am also leaving because it’s not right that I am dating someone and sometimes thinking about someone else.
I am a horrible person, I am naive and stupid and I know it.
I just need advice on how to tell him that I am leaving because he doesn’t treat me well.

Hello! idk where can i ask this, but can i file a case against someone for harassment?
Just today, my friend invited me magsimba then i said yes para samahan sya magsindi since finals nya this week. After that, we went to arcade and played then decided mag coffee shop.
This friend of mine has a bf na may ayaw sa’kin (7 years na kaming friends ng kaibigan) and ayaw nya rin sumasama sya sa amin ng circles namin. Every time we are hanging out tumatawag sya at sinusundo talaga sya. Funny, never nya (bf) nga kami binabati kahit hi or hello. Ang bastos nya towards sa amin for no reason!
Going back, when we are on our way sa coffee, he keeps calling my friend. Then pumasok na kami sa cafe museum and i’m the one who also paid. Noong pa order na kami, bumaba ‘yung friend ko kasi ang kulit nga ng bf nya. Umakyat din ‘yung friend ko but minutes later umakyat ‘yung bf nya ang cause a scene! The female employee stopped him na umakyat kasi bawal nga since meron entrance fee. We had a confrontation. Tapos bigla nya lang kinuha ang gamit ng friend ko at kinaladkad ‘yung friend ko. I was so shocked, i called for help sa guard. Then my panic attacks trigger, nakita ko na lang tinutulak ng bf nya sya papasok sa taxi. I couldn’t help but cried kasi he looks like can mvrder someone. And i’m so dead worried sa friend ko.
The employees actually helped me to fix myself, after that nagsubong ako sa ate nya abt the situation. I know snitching is bad, but come on! safety ng kaibigan ko ang top priority ko.
Her boyfriend also name called me for being a wh0re! Isa lang naman dinate ko. May time rin inawan ng bf nya sya sa gitna ng plaza na cashless. Good thing, i saved her ass to book some grab.
Can i file po ba? i also coordinated with the cafe museum and they are willing naman since may cctv around the area.
P.S. apologies to my grammatical error, i’m still tulala po of what happened.

Hi guys! Today was my first day working at the diner (don’t worry, I’m still taking it easy. They gave me a pretty easy work until I’m 100% recovered.) I’m super excited to be on the job, but something weird happened.
These two funny looking guys came in. They were super pale. Like, chalk pale. They kept speaking qnd blinking in sync. I asked them if they wanted to order anything, and one asked for a cup of coffee. When I brought it to him, he acted like he didn’t know what to do with it. Then they started asking me really mundane questions about my job, what kind of food we serve, what ingredients are in the food… all basic stuff. Finally, one of them picked up my pencil and asked me about it. I kid you not, he said “can you explain the purpose of this object?” I have to admit, I thought he was joking around, so I told him it was a dangerous weapon of mass destruction.
Well. I think I fucked up. He gave his buddy/partneboyfriend a look, and put it in his pocket. (?) then they thanked me for my time, and left. I didn’t think anything of it, until I checked the clock and saw it was suddenly WAY past the end of my shift. The hell???
Anyway, has anyone else dealt with these guys? Maybe they’re TikTok pranksters. I did have the weird impression I was being filmed.

This is my ranking of every Impractical Jokers episode starting when Joe left. I was going to wait until season 10 was over to post this, but I’m just gonna post it now, as I have no idea if season 10 is done or still going.
I’ll be referring to the episodes by their celebrity guests, but that’s only because that’s how IJ names their episodes. I’ll be judging the episodes as a whole, not just the guest.
I’m only doing mainline episodes, meaning no “sideline smacktalk” or shark week special.
25. Bobby Moinahan
In general, I like challenges where the Jokers have to convince a mark to go along with what they’re doing, but making it so both challenges had that goal made this episode monotonous. The telethon challenge was particularly disappointing, as I think there was a ton of potential to make the marks do a bunch of wacky things, but it wound up being “insult the customer” over and over.
The punishment also felt disjointed. Murr having to annoy and creep out wedding dress buyers was pretty standard, but making him eat his wedding band and then wear a wedding dress to the airport seemed really tacked on.
24. Jillian Bell
The “you’re fired” challenge was a swing and a miss. Not only is it not fun to watch the Jokers just act like jerks of their own volition, but the ruleset is backwards because it requires you to be a jerk and then you’ll lose if you do too good a job. I think this game could be easily fixed if they made the first half be a standard “refuse you lose” and then fire the mark and beg for your job.
The “one more minute” skit was pretty cringey (this is coming from someone who likes the skits more than the average IJ fan) and I much preferred the deleted skit shown on “Filming with the stars”
The punishment was really underwhelming.
The one saving grace was the “Boot and Rally” challenge, which isn’t one I’d want to see again, but was still entertaining because of how over the top it was, and because of how self aware they were that it’s not a good challenge.
23. David Cross
They basically copied and pasted one of the Rob Riggle skits for this episode. Even though the skits are the least important part of the show, it’s still kind of upsetting to see them get recycled.
The challenges were fairly average, with the exception of Max Zoda dragging down Sal’s turn.
I did like the punishment. The post-Joe episodes have been pretty dependent on physically painful punishments, but this one was pretty creative both in using various methods to torture Murr, and in doing it in a context where it seems acceptable.
22. Adam Pally and Jon Gabrus
The babysitting challenge was solid, and I like the choice to play beer pong with the guests instead of doing a skit. In fact, I think it would’ve been better to consistently show authentic interactions with the guests instead of skits. They could even make it a callback to the walking bits from season 1.
Sal’s shock punishment was also pretty entertaining. Although it is watered down by the abundance of physical punishments in this era of the show.
21. Paul Scheer
The two challenges were solid, but the punishment was pretty underwhelming. The overall idea is pretty funny after it’s explained, but the entertainment value dissipates after the first couple rounds.
20. Colin Jost
The ice cream challenge was an improvement over the “you’re fired” challenge from last episode. While it still involved the vague command of “act like a jerk”, they now made the mark a witness instead of a victim, and the Jokers were actually rewarded instead of punished for fulfilling that command.
This episode also opted to show a real interaction with its guest instead of a skit, which again, is a decision I like.
The love guru’s challenge was solid, with the best part being when the guy claimed to know about the relationship expert Murr and Sal made up.
The punishment was entertaining, but again, kind of diluted by how many physical punishments there have been recently.
19. Eric André Returns
Fairly underwhelming as an episode, but never to the point that I wasn’t enjoying it. The best part was Sal talking about his exploding wife.
18. Harvey Guillen
The lawyer challenge was alright. The best part was Q’s “potato chip or two” line, which highlighted the absurdity of how convoluted the contracts were
Having a challenge where each turn was at a different location was an interesting idea, but ultimately didn’t have much impact.
Q’s punishment was kind of underwhelming. When it started with him getting prosthetics, I was expecting him to look radically different and for it to be crucial to the punishment, so I was disappointed when Q was fairly recognizable and it wasn’t necessary for what he had to do. Though the punishment itself was still fun due to the energy Harvey gave it. Plus it had a surprisingly light hearted ending.
17. Paula Abdul
Most of the episode was middling. I was disappointed because I was expecting Paula to have a great dynamic with the Jokers due to them making a movie together, yet she wound up blending in as a guest.
The high point of the episode was the “get my wallet challenge”. I loved the twist of having Cha throw Q out instead of Dan, and I especially loved Q sabotaging Sal by giving him his wallet before the mark could get it. It was oddly nostalgic, as it was the kind of thing Joe would do.
16. Kesha
I really don’t like that they repeated Sal’s shock punishment, the seance setting made it just barely different enough to justify doing again.
However, the “fall in love” challenge was pretty fun, and the debate challenge with MJF was great. I’d love for him to work with the Jokers again.
15. Michael Ian Black
I liked the return of the texting challenge, and Murr chasing the greased up boy was ridiculous (in a good way).
The punishment was fairly standard, but Michael did a great job acting as the straight-man and adding to Sal’s embarrassment.
14. Kim Fields
Murr’s “fuck marry kill” conversation, Q’s mistletoe, and Q eating the dog treats were all fun moments. The punishment felt pretty old school (in a good way) and while Q calling a woman’s bitch briefly dampened the fun, the mood was saved by Murr’s impression afterwards.
13. Post Malone
I liked seeing the etiquette challenge brought back and I especially loved seeing the guy do a 180 after recognizing Murr.
The punishment was clever and Post did a great job fanning the flames between the customers and Q. Though I think it was an odd choice to end it as a man was calling 911 without showing how the situation resolves.
12. Eric Andre
The challenges don’t have any moments that particularly stand out to me, but they were consistently entertaining in a way where it always feels worth my time to watch.
This is a rare time where I’d say the best moment from an episode came from a skit, as I love the idea of Murr being a fictional character.
The one change I’d make is that I wish they cut the opening skit and instead spoke to the audience directly, explicitly acknowledging that Joe left and they would be changing things up. I feel like that would’ve made for a better transition.
11. John Mayer
I don’t like that this episode only had one challenge before the punishment, but I do like that the celebrity guest was involved in both the challenge and the punishment, which I wish was the case more often.
The challenge itself was also fun enough to make up for being the only one. I loved Sal randomly arm wrestling the investors, the constant utterance of “Bro” and Murr’s mark insinuating he hired prostitutes.
10. ALF
The ticket challenge was solid and the phone call challenge was great, especially Sal’s McRib story.
Making a fictional character the celebrity guest was a somewhat risky choice, but I think it worked out. They did a good job integrating ALF into the punishment, and I loved the detail of him thinking Q enjoyed the food.
9. Anthony Davis
I like challenges where the Jokers have to convince the mark to lie, so I really enjoyed the “playing hookie” challenge.
I did not like the second challenge though. I found Steve Byrne’s antics more annoying than funny.
This is made up for by the punishment, which I consider one of the best punishments in recent history. Allowing Sal to opt out of tasks at a price was a clever way of adding stakes and making the punishment standout. The final task in particular was genius, and while it could have been over the line, Anthony avoided that by giving the kid his own shoes.
8. Method Man
The punishment was just uncomfortable and not very fun to watch, but the episode makes up for it with the challenges.
The scientists challenge was great, and the “don’t smirk” challenge was possibly the funniest segment in the whole post-Joe era. I personally think the “no smirking” rule was a bit excessive, and a rule against laughing would’ve been plenty, but the content of the challenge was hilarious, and that’s what matters.
7. Bruce Campbell
The Rosanna Scotto challenge was alright, with the most interesting part being when customers defended dumpster diving.
The waiter challenge was great. I loved Murr’s “who’s paying?” bit and Q constantly trying to improve the women’s ribs.
The punishment was great and felt like something we’d get in the older seasons. For the Bobby Moynihan episode, I mentioned that parts of Murr’s punishment seemed tacked on, and that’s not the case here. Each step of Q’s punishment felt like a natural extension, and Campbell did a great job as the overly demanding director.
6. Bret Michaels
The Grocery Roll was a great challenge to kick off the COVID restrictions being lifted. Murr and Sal each had spectacular Pratt falls.
The hide and seek challenge was a welcomed return. While I wouldn’t want it to become a staple of the show, I think it’s a great game to throw in once every couple of seasons to shake things up. Sal genuinely wondering if he can breathe in the fridge, repeatedly trying to close the door on himself, and hurting his arm on the third attempt was very stupid in the best way possible.
Murr’s punishment was a mixed bag. The armwrestling, bowls of soup, and Paul Rudd showing up out of nowhere were all hilarious, but whenever a mark is furious and has their face blurred, I go from enjoying the discomfort to just feeling bad for everyone involved.
5. Rob Riggle
The taste test challenge was great, with Q’s mark being one of the funniest of season in recent history.
The workout challenge was even better and really recaptured the magic they had in earlier seasons. Murr’s “wrong/good” workout and Sal’s refusal to accept help were particularly great.
The punishment was also solid. Murr having to stay still while mostly naked was simple and effective, and they were able to create a wacky enough environment around him that there’s more to keep things entertaining.
4. Chris Jericho
This is the first episode that made me realize IJ can make great episodes.
The Joint Gravy challenge was absolutely hilarious. Especially Sal’s turn.
The focus group challenge was also great. I’d be happy if they made Jiggy… not the fourth Joker… but the official stand-in whenever they have a challenge where they need to pair up.
The two skits were both really good. The opener was grounded and reserved, while the mid-show skit was ridiculous in the best way.
While I’ve said that IJ has gone a bit overboard with the physical torture punishments, I think this one was well done. It was creative to let Q alternate between various painful tasks as he wanted, and I loved how he was dependent on Sal’s mom to end the punishment. I really wish she started getting involved in the show earlier, because she’s hilarious.
3. Kal Penn
Having to sell a product after coming in through the window was hysterical, both in concept and execution. All three turns had a completely different feel to them. Murr was slimy and confident, Q was overly enthusiastic, and Sal was completely desperate.
The eating challenge was similar to the “Boot and Rally” challenge to me, in the sense that it’s not something I’d want to see again, but it was made funny due to the Jokers being self aware about it not being a good challenge. Murr’s frustration at Q and Sal saying they’d just take the thumbs down was 10X funnier than if they actually attempted the challenge.
The punishment itself was solid. It’s a simple but effective idea, and revealing that it was Sal’s breath that stunk was a great ending.
2. Blake Anderson
They brought back two challenges that had each only been done once before, which could be risky, but worked out great.
The “phony fees” challenge was a welcomed return. Johnna did a great job making the charges seem legitimate, and the woman constantly praising Q was amazing.
The Yearbook challenge was also really good. The gag about them all being married to Melissa reminded me of the organic humor we got back when Joe was on the show.
The punishment was my favorite of season 10. It has a juvenile charm where I know what Sal’s doing is really dumb, yet am root for him to get away with it.
1. Brooke Shields
Brooke gave the same energy as a guest that I was hoping to get from Paula Abdul.
The opening skit was great, largely because of how well Brooke sold the role of a fangirl.
This was the first time we saw the celebrity guest participate in a challenge, and it was very fun to watch. The girl trying to dab while in a suitcase was hilarious.
The “Brooke of Love” punishment was genius. We’ve seen challenges that convert to punishments before, but it was always done on the fly and/or kept secret from the joker being punished. Having everyone know that whoever loses will be punished immediately was a really unique approach and I hope they do something similar in the future.
I also love the idea of a dating show where the guys are all trying to be as unappealing as possible. Sal’s rap, the return of Stanley Merkle, and the hushed trash talking (trash whispering?) were all fantastic. I know the show (usually) doesn’t repeat punishments, but I’d love to see the challenge be done again, even if it’s without the instant punishment at the end. It could be in the context of a dating show again, or it could be something like a job interview.

Hello there, friendly internet people! My name's Alex, and I'm looking to make some awesome friends with other mentally healthy, well-rounded, and energizing people who are local or close by. I'm open to connecting with anyone, regardless of (18+) ages, genders, and marital statuses, as long as you are mentally and emotionally mature and passionate about something we can enjoy together or teach each other about!
I'm 29, single, 5'9", around 160 lbs, white (Eastern European), and in slim fit shape. I recently moved to Land O Lakes, FL. I have no kids, live a drama-free life, and don't do drugs, smoke, or drink.
Personal things I enjoy doing/value (in no particular order):
playing tennis or mini-tennis aka pickleball (would love to find consistent partners!)
scenic runs/walks (esp around lakes or parks)
cooking meals/meal prep
listening to music (enjoy anything upbeat and exciting like pop, EDM, and classic hits. Only things I generally dislike are hardcore rap, country, and heavy metal basically)
learning new things (esp self-improvement, business, investing, tech, science, philosophy, psychology, medicine)
Always honest, open, deep/personal communication
exercise (toned but not like 9-inch biceps lol. I run a few miles 1x a week, walk quite a bit, and then workout ~2x a week)
and then watching movies (mainly sci-fi, action, comedy. esp like deep ones that make you think such as Interstellar, Inception, Limitless, etc), shows, memes, educational/funny youtube vids, etc. I love to share random things that remind me of you after getting to know you a bit.
I want our time together to help us connect/learn about each other but also both fuel up on whatever we most need to grow as people. For example, us working out together to make sure we keep each other accountable for staying active. Or maybe we had an intense week and needed some downtime by walking in a park, tennis, or something. Or working on improving each other's businesses, financial plans, etc by sharing our knowledge or strengths.
That's the kind of connection I want to strive to make! And hopefully, if YOU also started imagining scenarios and thinking something like "wow, that would be so NICE to have a connection like that!" Then you should definitely send me a message!

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year. I’m 19 “19F” and he’s 23 “23M” and we got together when I was 18 and he was 22. A few months into the relationship he got a job as a bar back. He loves it and he loves his coworkers and I was happy for him in the beginning! He recently got promoted at as a full-time bartender and will start in about a week. He typically stays late after his shifts and says that he is hanging out with his regular “Mark” after work. He’ll be off his phone for hours after he gets off and I trust him that he’s at the bar hanging out with Mark.
However, a few days ago we were in the parking lot of his apartment complex and a girl comes up to us. She says “hey neighbor” to him and completely ignores me and my boyfriend does not introduce me to this girl who clearly knows him. At the end of the brief encounter she said to him “well if you ever want to talk or hangout you have my number” to which he said “yea for sure”. Also she was wearing a transparent shirt so I could see her nipples. I felt uncomfortable and thought it was weird that he agreed to hangout with another girl (who I felt was clearly asking him out and blatantly ignoring me) right in front of me, didnt introduce me as his girlfriend, and he had already given her his number. The next day I was ignoring his texts and he called me 30 times. I just told him how am I supposed to trust that he can say no to drunk girls who will be flirting with him at the bar if he can’t say no when I’m standing right next to him? Am I being dramatic?
Also one night later we went to a concert for his coworker and one of his coworkers asked me if my name was “wren” and said she thought my boyfriend was dating a girl named wren (which my boyfriend- when I asked him about it later- claims to not know any wrens) and she kept telling me how much she LOVES my boyfriend. She said it three times. Another one of his coworkers was showing my boyfriend nudes of some random booty call he had. I explained to my boyfriend that I didn’t really feel like his coworkers were respectful of our relationship. He apologized for their actions but still talks about them a lot and how funny/cool they are when I feel that they have just been rude to me. And honestly I’m concerned because my boyfriend looks up to these people and admires them as people, I just don’t want him to be easily influenced/ tempted. Also all of his coworkers are single and in their late 20- early 40s.
I also found a pair of furry handcuffs in his nightstand a few months ago (that we have never used together) and when I asked him about it he threw them away. This was probably 9 months into our relationship… why did he still have them?
Should I end things with him out of lack of trust? Am I thinking too much into things? I want to trust him but after all this stuff has gone down and after he said yes to hanging out with his neighbor (when we’ve established that neither of us are comfortable with the other hanging out with someone of the opposite gender one on one) I honestly don’t know anymore.
TL;DR: My boyfriend said yes to hanging out/ talking to another girl right in front of me, he had already given her his number, and didn’t introduce me as his girlfriend or mention me at all. He said he’s sorry and that she’s crazy and that he was never actually going to hangout with her but still. I felt invisible and now I feel like I can’t trust him. Should I break things off?

I was seeing this guy who was a bit out of my league last year for 3ish months. I'm pretty, but I'm not white. I'm funny, smart, educated, stylish, interesting. He is very well educated and well dressed and successful - we're both top 3 college, top finance job, etc. He's very tall and handsome too. He had mentioned to me many times while seeing each other hes very picky, hes into thinner women, and likes blue eyes.
I felt sort of honored because he chose to keep seeing me with all these criteria. (he had more). He complimented me a lot on physical and other attributes so I felt very confident with him.
However, I was also on medication those couple months that made me gain maybe 10lbs of water weight so my shoulders, arms, waist, legs were all noticeably puffier than normal. He never saw my normal. I got off the meds after we broke up.
He was always happy to see me about once a week for 3-4 months - he'd plan us a date and dress up all fancy and have me help him choose an outfit to match mine, he'd hold me so close wherever we went, couldn't let go of me in public. We'd stare into each other's eyes with love and I'd never felt so close to someone. He'd call me intimidatingly beautiful and he'd say he liked me.
He'd only take me out for 1 drink every time though, in his neighborhood, and we'd return back to his to sleep over, and he'd leave in the morning for work and not text for 3 days after. We'd text a lot of volume, but he'd only reply to my chunk of texts once every 24h or so saying he was a bad texter. I tried to get him to hang out on weekends or meet my friends once, and he was a bit dodgy.
Our last date we returned home - he carried me up his building's stairs and we almost went inside but he made it a point to avoid his friends b/c they were downstairs. So we entered to avoid his friends. I felt a bit off. I finally asked him what we are, b/c I was anxious, and he seemed so stressed and was like, "ah thats been on my mind recently too...what are we doing....I'm just truly not ready for a serious relationship since my ex, I can't even THINK about them right now" and I basically ran out crying and I've been broken over it every day since because I really loved and wanted him.
Well fast forward to now, I realize that 2 months after we broke up he had a new girlfriend hard launch him.
It shocked me to my core because 1. she looked like an IG model - gorgeous, blonde, blue eyes, stick skinny. And 2. Just the fact that he told me to my face he wasn't ready and then suddenly was someone's boyfriend, taking her home to his parents, I really trusted him with everything, and this broke me deeply. She posts them all the time together all over each other - on his lap everywhere, I would've died to spend time with him at their family home. I have been crying and panicking nonstop since finding out. I feel so ugly.
1. Do you have any advice to help me with this situation? I know he doesn't think of me or care, so I shouldn't, but I can't stop myself from wanting to scream and ask him why the hell he lied to me and if it was all fake between us.
2. How can I feel better about my weight? I normally am almost as skinny as his new girl, but I was really just super bloated and chubby when I was with him. I really want him to have seen the "normal real" me, with thin waist, abs, etc. I know that's so stupid, but I wake up every day upset about it. And I've been losing a lot of weight, and instead of being happy about it I just have a panic attack about him not having seen it.

I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost a year after ending a horrible loveless marriage about 2 years ago. When my boyfriend (55) and I (40) met, sparks flew and we hit it off immediately. I had already given up on the idea of having children after being stuck in an unfulfilling marriage so it was a surprise when my boyfriend and I learned we were pregnant with my first baby (he has 2 teenage children). During the duration of our relationship (much of it being pregnant), he has given me various nicknames including some that I find hurtful and rude. He’s trying to be funny and gives other people nicknames but I just wish it was something more endearing from him, especially being pregnant and carrying his child. Things between us have gotten more strained at we approached our baby’s due date, yesterday, and I can’t help but start to internalize his various nicknames. In the duration of our relationship, he’s called me “not too choosy floozy”, “mostly white woman” (I’m multiracial), “5/8 fiancée”, “incubator”, and most recently “almost MILF.” Not only does he call me these names but he’ll change how I am identified in his cell phone so these various names have come up at different times on his cell phone. I have told him that its offensive and hurtful, especially “not too choosy floozy” since I had recently been separated before meeting him. Right now, I feel like I’m losing autonomy in my pregnancy having had the due date come and go yesterday and I truly just feel like an incubator. There was some concern 4 days ago about decreased fetal movement and we called L&D triage who advised us to do fetal movement counts. The baby started moving more normally and has been pretty active since then but he was still upset and concerned about the decreased fetal movements, despite me telling him and trying to reassure him that I was feeling the baby actively move normally in the last few days. I also tried to get him to feel the movements but he was too impatient and didn’t feel what I was feeling. We had an argument last night and ended up going to get checked out at L&D triage to appease him and all the fetal heart monitoring and activity was normal. They checked my cervix which had no signs of dilation or effacement yet. I’m just not in early labor yet, which is what I also have been telling him, but I feel like things are progressing as expected with some BH contractions and low pelvic cramping but not consistent with any patterns. On the way home he basically told me he’s only worried about the baby and not what I’m feeling. So not only do I not feel heard and unsupported, I truly feel like I am just an incubator at this point. I feel like I’m stuck and not seen for who I am as a complete person and it feels so degrading, especially trying everything I can to be a good mom to our unborn baby. When it comes time, I don’t know that I even want him in the delivery room.

I was seeing this guy who was a bit out of my league last year for 3ish months. I'm pretty, but I'm not white. I'm funny, smart, educated, stylish, interesting. He is very well educated and well dressed and successful - we're both top 3 college, top finance job, etc. He's very tall and handsome too. He had mentioned to me many times while seeing each other hes very picky, hes into thinner women, and likes blue eyes.
I felt sort of honored because he chose to keep seeing me with all these criteria. (he had more). He complimented me a lot on physical and other attributes so I felt very confident with him.
However, I was also on medication those couple months that made me gain maybe 10lbs of water weight so my shoulders, arms, waist, legs were all noticeably puffier than normal. He never saw my normal. I got off the meds after we broke up.
He was always happy to see me about once a week for 3-4 months - he'd plan us a date and dress up all fancy and have me help him choose an outfit to match mine, he'd hold me so close wherever we went, couldn't let go of me in public. We'd stare into each other's eyes with love and I'd never felt so close to someone. He'd call me intimidatingly beautiful and he'd say he liked me.
He'd only take me out for 1 drink every time though, in his neighborhood, and we'd return back to his to sleep over, and he'd leave in the morning for work and not text for 3 days after. We'd text a lot of volume, but he'd only reply to my chunk of texts once every 24h or so saying he was a bad texter. I tried to get him to hang out on weekends or meet my friends once, and he was a bit dodgy.
Our last date we returned home - he carried me up his building's stairs and we almost went inside but he made it a point to avoid his friends b/c they were downstairs. So we entered to avoid his friends. I felt a bit off. I finally asked him what we are, b/c I was anxious, and he seemed so stressed and was like, "ah thats been on my mind recently too...what are we doing....I'm just truly not ready for a serious relationship since my ex, I can't even THINK about them right now" and I basically ran out crying and I've been broken over it every day since because I really loved and wanted him.
Well fast forward to now, I realize that 2 months after we broke up he had a new girlfriend hard launch him.
It shocked me to my core because 1. she looked like an IG model - gorgeous, blonde, blue eyes, stick skinny. And 2. Just the fact that he told me to my face he wasn't ready and then suddenly was someone's boyfriend, taking her home to his parents, I really trusted him with everything, and this broke me deeply. She posts them all the time together all over each other - on his lap everywhere, I would've died to spend time with him at their family home.
I have been crying and panicking nonstop since finding out. I feel so ugly.
1. Do you have any advice to help me with this situation? I know he doesn't think of me or care, so I shouldn't, but I can't stop myself from wanting to scream and ask him why the hell he lied to me and if it was all fake between us.
2. How can I feel better about my weight? I normally am almost as skinny as his new girl, but I was really just super bloated and chubby when I was with him. I really want him to have seen the "normal real" me, with thin waist, abs, etc. I know that's so stupid, but I wake up every day upset about it. And I've been losing a lot of weight, and instead of being happy about it I just have a panic attack about him not having seen it.

These past 2 years have been brutal, it's been L after L with no break.
I feel like a mouse in a maze that every time it approaches the exit is dragged back to the start by a hand from the sky.
It doesn't matter how much I try, the outcome is always the worst possible one.
I've gone from agnostic to full on believer because I don't think someone can be this unlucky without some almighty being involved in it.
I now fully believe God exists and either:

1. He is actively punishing me
2. He has left me stranded

   
Will keep it short since I know you hoes like reading this kind of shit:
 
Around 2 years ago I was leasing a horse, and giving it my all, I was earning an entry-level salary in a comfy remote work living with my parents. Keeping the horse was costing me pretty much my full salary. I didn't go out and did anything except lifting, running, riding and working.
For almost a year I was the happiest I had ever been, I literally jumped out of bed excited to live the day, I would work 8-4, lift in my home gym and go visit my horse, either riding, or just being with him, during the time I had him I didn't go a single day without seeing him.
Of course living like this means that I don't have the most social life or friends circle, but I didn't care since every hour of my life was busy.
My plan for the year was training and competing and then in September changing jobs and buying the horse, but in July the horse was injured, I didn't get the best veterinary advice and didn't know what to do, I was being drained for a horse I couldn't even ride or enjoy, after all those months of hard work and discipline, for some reason the owner got mad, and petty sold him behind my back.
During this time, my highschool best friend started regaining contact and started meeting with me and his gf, they gave me a lot of support during those weeks, against all odds, I nailed an interview for a high-paying job that would've allowed me to buy the horse and maintain it comfortably.
I was still too hurt from what had happened, so I just chilled for a few months, saving money, and hanging out with my friend and his gf, and lifting and running, I was at my physical peak, I was lifting heavier than ever, running faster and longer, I was optimistic for the future, I just needed time to heal and I had the means to do so, social life, earning money and physical activity.
 
Fast forward to December and I receive a cryptic message from my friend's GF saying that she wasn't going to be here for my birthday (we met the previous day) because my dumbass friend just broke up with her.
That basically destroyed my little social life since they were living in the city, and my friend disappeared to be with his new GF.
I tried to comfort her and be there for her (wasn't attracted and even if I were it wouldn't be right to take advantage of the situation).
The months of just working and lifting allowed me to save enough to start looking to buy my own horse, I was still hurting from the whole situation, and being alone, but still I was just lifting heavy, running, walking my dog, keeping myself busy.
In February after trying and vetting some horses, I found one that seemed promising. I bought a very expensive veterinary exam, and he passed it, allegedly, I buy the horse.
 
Long story short, barely 3 weeks into ownership, I started noticing pain and weird stuff that shouldn't be happening since I started with very soft work, a few weeks of going through 3 different vets, and basically the horse had a life-long injury that the first vet didn't catch in the exam, and basically it was done for, I was devastated, I tried some solutions but they we're not effective, it was over.
During those months, my friend's ex-gf started coming to visit me, we slept together (no sex), we talked every day, I gave her presents, one would say what I did was love bombing her, but to me It was just being there giving support, for her it turned into a situationship.
I still had the horse, I couldn't selling him while he was untrained, and I still had a bit of faith in the vet's advice, and then, suddenly, my knee started hurting, I was lucky that in my new job I had private insurance, so I could immediately go to the orthopedist and do an MRI without the long ass waits of the public health care (up to a year for the MRI), and lo and behold, torn meniscus, it rapidly went from "pain while running" to "some days I can't even fucking walk", I had to stop riding, paying my trainer to ride my horse since I needed to sell him, I had to stop running, I had to stop doing any leg gym exercises.
I didn't want to do the surgery since what I read online was very contradictory.
 
Because shit can always get worse, one day I was alone with my parents (we also live with my brother and grandma), and I notice the vibes being off, I ask “what the fuck is your problem?” and they confess that my father doesn’t like my mom anymore, well, not to get into too much detail but since then I’ve had to endure watching my mom cry, they get into arguments all the time, just awful, thing is I was already so drained from my personal bullshit that after the initial shock, It didn’t pain me too much, they just keep living together, although I hear them arguing from time to time.
During those months my ex-friend’s ex-gf kept catching feelings for me, and my autistic ass couldn't really read the situation so I made it worse. Finally she asked me if I was going serious with her or if she could go on about her life. I said that I didn't see her as my partner, and since then she got a boyfriend and our friendship went to shit.
 
I finally sold the horse, my life got extremely bored.
I decided to do the surgery since I couldn't do any of the things I enjoyed, running, riding, whatever, but I had a trip in January with her so I had to postpone it until then, for those months all I could do was going for walks like an old man, and hit the gym (all chest no legs), I was going kinda hard tho, since I knew that during the months of recovery I would lose a lot of muscle and I wanted to go in my best form, during those months I acquired my best physique ever, for the first time, after years of being constant, I liked how my body looked.
The trip was a mistake, she nagged me every minute of it, I could tell she had only gone because it was already paid for, I had postponed the surgery 2 months just to have a horrible weekend.
 
I did the surgery and the first bad news came, they couldn't fix the broken part of the meniscus, so they took it out, this was the worst possible outcome since it would mean a shorter recovery, but the probabilities of arthritis in the future were higher, off to a good start.
2 weeks later I start going to rehab, during those weeks nobody came to visit me, well, my friend did, only to talk shit on his new coworker (during those months he would only message me to talk shit about coworkers or work), nobody else, not the situationship, not my trainer, nobody.
Speaking about the situationship, after the trip, she stopped messaging me, and even replying at all. I thought, well, there it goes, I’ve lost “not being an unopened chat” privilege.
Some boring months of rehab, working the job that I started to dread, and doing the boring ass knee exercises at home, and then, suddenly a glimmer of hope.
 
I start being treated by a “new” physio, but turns out she had been on sick leave for the same reason as me, she tore her meniscus, during those first 3-4 sessions we talked and talked for the whole hour, she was just perfect, around my age, funny, cute, was active, played sports, had a nice body, she lives like 5 minutes walk from my house.
I immediately fell in love like I had never before in my life, and that’s when it came to me, this was it, every bad thing that happened to me has come to this, to meeting this girl, everything made sense, If I had my surgery earlier I would not have met her because she would be on sick leave. My broken meniscus, my lame horse, every bad thing that had happened to me had led me to her.
So I take my autistic ass, and since I felt like we had something cool going on I ask “Hey, I think you’re very interesting and cute and would like to know you better, can I have your number so we can meet and go for a drink some day?” and she actually did give it to me, I asked for her number instead of her IG because I didn’t want to play any game, I thought she wouldn’t give me her number unless she was interested in me, I was ecstatic.
I start texting her and after refusing to meet a few times (with actually convincing excuses) I ask her “Hey if you don't want its fine I won't bother you anymore, just tell me” and she basically told me that she didn’t want to break the physio-patient barrier, I didn’t understand anything but I didn’t want to make it weirder since she is still treating me so I just accepted it.
 
The thing is, I know where she lives, I have to walk past her apartment whenever I go for a walk, drive to town, I get reminded constantly, moving on is very hard, I really thought she was for me, I thought she was finally the reward for all my suffering, but turns out she's just part of the punishment, I legit had a religious revelation, every single bad thing that had happened, God made it so I went and met her, my knee injury, having to sell the horse, losing my friends, no way it was a coincidence.
 
Now that I know that she is not for me, not even as a friend, I have nothing, the knee recovery is not going well, I was supposed to be a-ok in 6 weeks, It’s been 3 months and I still can’t even go for a walk without swelling and pain, I can’t workout because the knee exercises take a long ass time and I feel like they’re not doing shit, I don’t have friends to meet and take my mind off it, every few weeks I have to see my mum weeping around the house because my father is a piece of shit.
 
And to top it all, I just started having similar pain in the good knee, so there is a possibility that even If I hadn’t done shit, it may be injured too, this shit just doesn’t end, it just fucking never ends.
     
TLDR: Everything that has ever given me pleasure or made me happy has been taken away from me. I went from getting out of bed full of hope and enthusiasm to sleeping through my alarms because the only thing I can do is sit in front of a screen. I’ve been having the worst day of my life every day for the past 2 years, after everything I’ve worked hard for and all the sacrifices I’ve made.