Birthday poems for sister

So this is going to be a long story, but a very intriguing one (or so my friends say). Bear with me and if you could offer some advice on what to do please share. I know I'm probably just young and naive but I feel like the pain will never stop. Like I'm going to always be held back by this particular experience.
Also sorry for any grammatical or spelling errors, English isn't my first language.
So all of this begins October of 2022 when I 18 (at the time) Male moved to a new city to study film. I was lucky enough to have good grades and be so passionate about this art that it kind of felt incredible to have this new beginning. I rented a small house which I decorated with my collections and all my stuff and ended up loving every second spend in it.
I'm Not very social. Thats just a fact. I've always had my school friends and some people from other activities but none of them really felt like they understood me. No sade to them, I really love them, it's just that I know my hobbies and personality are niece and weird so we don't always see eye to eye. So I wanted to overcome my social anxiety and meet new people.
For the first semester I was all alone. Completely. Spent days upon days without leaving my house if I didn't have school and even didn't have any actual human interaction if not necessary. I didn't realise how much I was hurting myself. The Second semester, someone approached me in school and asked if I could help them with the editing for their final movie, let's call him Jacob. I already was searching for a group project to join in order to pass the class so this felt like a sweet deal. The group was Jacob and 2 girls, let's call them Ellie and Hannah.
With time we started talking about more then just the movie. I was really surprised by how many things we had in common. It was the first time someone I met liked musical theatre or (and this is gonna sound sad, please don't judge me) people didn't want me to leave whenever I approached them. They invited me to things, to their homes and after school and to trips at the beach ect. We were together almost every day. Till late at night or through it. Just the 4 of us. Felt like we could rule the world.
One day i thought Ellie was flirting with me. That was a weird feeling. I'm not very good looking and had a lot of extra weight so that was pretty much the first time but my friends told me that was the case from what I was describing. I mentioned it to Jacob and he told me something I didn't expect. He told me him and Ellie were in an open relationship and were hiding it from everyone except Hannah because of his ex who was in school with us. He also confessed he once had a crush on me and that's why he approached me in the first place. He also saw Ellie flirting with me but was ok with it due to the "rules of their relationship".
I was ok with not having a romantic relationship with Ellie. She would actually become one of the closest friends I've ever had. Or so I thought.
I actually started having a crush on Hannah. She loved some of the movies I loved. Had some of my quirks so I didn't feel ashamed around her and she started watching my favourite tv show with me. During our time together everyone (even her sister and Jacob who found out I liked her) told us that when we were together we could only see each other. As if we had a unique way of communication that nobody else could understand.
I confessed my crush and she told me she felt the same way but that there where 2 problems. First that she gets very anxious about relationships, has only ever been to one and had never kissed anyone. I assured her I wasn't going to pressure anything and I only cared for her and wanted to go on a date sometime. She replied she would like that very much. The second problem she confessed was that she was in love with Jacob for months now but nobody knew. Then everything made sense. The things she did for him and all. How she acted around him. I was surprised I didn't notice it before. She told me she wanted to get over it and proceed to ask to kiss me. We kissed a lot but nothing more that night. She went home after a few hours.
The next day Hannah she felt very distant. We wanted to go to the movies with Ellie but she disappeared all day. Late at night she asked my to go for a walk since we lived near each other. Then she told me she wanted to forget everything and last night was a mistake. That her anxiety has gotten into her and although she really wanted a relationship she couldn't be in one. The next few days we talked again and she said she didn't share any of this with Jacob to have someone in the group I could talk to if I needed help. Ellie was that for her.
It was already summer so we all went to our home towns. I missed her a ton. We stilled talked and the other 2 knew something was off with me. About 2 moths later we all went to Hannah's summerhouse for vacation. We were having fun, getting drunk and all that 19-year old stuff. One night me and Hannah were watching my show together and the time felt right so I asked to kiss her. She told me no and finally told me the truth. Turns out she liked that we flirted but after kissing me she realised it wasn't anything more. Also everyone knew except me. But after all this time I had realised I was in love with this girl. I told her if she could keep all of this to herself and she said yes.
We were all still friends. But I couldn't let go. My mental health began to decent and I started feeling like they would leave me out of stuff to go hang out alone and during October I tried talking some time away to see if they would even talk to me if I didn't. They didn't even say good morning once. I tried again and again. Jacob and Ellie said we all need to talk together. They repeated the same words. Like as if it was rehearsed. I went to "the talk".
Jacob did most of the talking. He talked about boundaries and how after everything between me and Hannah the group hasn't been the same. That after I didn't tell him what happened in our vacation they went to her and forced Hannah to do so. They where all attacking me. I heard lie after lie and all followed up with "we just need some time" and that all of this was cause they loved me.
I have discussed what they accused me of with friends, family and therapists. Although I didn't not believe it at first they all confirmed it was finding little details in my day-to-day behaviour (unrelated to all of the above) and using it to kick me out. They didn't intend of even speaking to me again. Lies feed to everyone by Jacob.
I went away. I don't know if it was for the better. But for a few weeks at first and then months later, I went back to my home town. Their lies became actual blame and I got a message from Ellie saying that we are done (just one month after trying to convince me they needed time and confessing she in particular didn't even notice anything until her boyfriend accused me).
Last time I saw any of them was in December when I gave Hannah her Christmas present. I told her I wasn't trying to get her back and I would continue to keep my distance since my first priority is what she wants and I meant that. I really do love her and would do anything for her to be happy. But I miss her a ton.
It's been 5 months since then. I stopped going to school and kept my distance from anyone related to that life. I have depression and cannot think about anything else. I heard that Jacob still talk shut about me to everyone. I have realised what has happened and have discussed this with multiple common friends who have confirmed this. Jacob is Manipulating the other 2 because of the bad relationship with his parents. He knows Ellie won't do anything with anyone else despite the "open" relationship due to her luck of confidence (so it only works for him). She need him to operate in public and to deal with her extreme anxiety so he takes advantage of that and Hannah follows him everywhere with the excuse of just being a good friend.
There are so many things I couldn't include (this is a hugh post already) about more lies and proof that they where bad for me. But I can't move on. I have seeked medical help but I just cant imagine my life in the future without them. Everything is a reminder of what we've been through. Jacob used to call me his family and when I begged him for our friendship back he didn't even care. Not on my birthday, not on new years... never. I lost all of them.
I'm back now. Not sure why, whether I'm back to continue my studies or to see if I could win them back. If I could have Hannah in my life in sime form. But I'll probably see them tomorrow morning (I randomly walked behind them today, don't think they noticed me).
Please if you have any advice share it. I just want to feel happy again. Even for a second.
TL,DR: The girl I'm in love with stopped talking to me along with my 2 best friends. I can't move on and I'm supposed to face them again in school after not seeing them for months. They all lied to me and nothing seem to help. I have depression and I dont want to feel like this for the rest of my life.

So, I've watched the AITA videos on YouTube all the time, so I thought I would bring a couple of my stories here. (This is a long one, so bear with me.) I tried to post this on another aita page but there were too many rules. I'm sure everyone else has a more interesting story than me.
I (19, female) recently moved out of my apartment so I could save for a better one. So I recently went back to my mom's for a bit (40, female) with her husband (35, male). Before I even thought about coming back home, my mom always told me, "Come back home. You can have the room back. Nobody helps me with the dog or clean. We missed you so much; I've been depressed since you've been gone."
Now, before I get to the story, let me give you some background on my (16, female) sister. I'll give her a fake name. Let's call her Nya. My mom would complain about how my sister (27 female), who has custody of my sister, uses my sister's taxes for herself and my niece, and Nya never gets anything. Now, I understand her frustration, but she's a hypocrite. She asked my dad's wife if she could claim me last year. Mind you, I was 18, and if Shes complaining that my sister should've gotten her taxes, then mine should've gone to me, all $5,000 of it, but I didn't trip about it at first. Well, she got me furniture with the taxes after I told her I did not want or need any furniture in my room, so I had stuff I didn't even want when I already had stuff. She told me, "When you move, you can take it." Well, I moved to my boyfriend's mom's house for a couple of months and then got my own apartment. I went to ask if I could get my furniture, and she's going to say, "Oh. Nya sleeps in here when she visits on weekends, and it's set up to be her room." she could've kept my old furniture in storage if she was going to play in my face like that. Nya only visits 8 times out of the whole month unless it's a holiday, no school, or half a day. She could've given me my furniture. I was laying on an old mattress that came from my boyfriend's moms place and it hurt our backs. I was paying so much for rent and just to live that I couldn't afford to get a new one. I really hated Nya because she knew what she was doing. On my birthday, she got gifted more things than I did because she had an attitude. But when it was hers, I didn't get NOTHING. Imagine someone else getting more gifts than you on your own birthday. They had me pierce my own nose at 15, but Nya professionally got hers done. My nose closed up, and we've done this about 6 times, but they got her pierced twice on both sides her nose. When she'd come over, if they'd go out, she'd always ask for something, and if she didn't get her way, she wouldn't speak with my mother or her husband. Almost every time I see her, she has something new that my mom got her. She comes over and uses my mom; she doesn't even hang out with my mom when she's here unless they go out. She hides in the room. And ironically, every time I leave stuff around her, it goes missing. She would steal stuff from my mom too, and the whole time, it would be something of mine that my mom was holding onto for me. Over $300 worth of stuff she's stolen or got CAUGHT stealing. She's able to call my mom a (b word), but I was told, "You can cuss; just don't ever call me a (b word)." Like my sister basically owns her at this point. You might've already seen where this was going.
My mom called me the day I was packing, which was literally Tuesday. It's been no more than 4-5 days, and it's already been so much drama. She had an attitude like she was surprised I was coming back, but me and her spoke several times the month before about it. She swore up, down, left, and right that it was okay. Silly me for thinking my mother, of all people, could be relied on. Well, she picks me up and complains how I had too many bags (it was 5 black bags and like 5 tiny grocery bags. My boyfriend had most of the other stuff, including big furniture that he was taking with his mom because she has a house. my mom has an apartment). I'm not surprised she was complaining; it's all she does. She said she didn't know what to do with the room yet because she "didn't want to pick favorites." The craziest part was Nya herself said I can stay in here and remember that its important.
She waited till about 9 o'clock PM to tell me that I could sleep in there. Now I had several bags, and they would've cried if they were all in the living room, so I took them in the room, but by now, you can probably tell nothing pleases them. A1 complainers. Well, everything was fine at first until my older sister texted me Friday night and said, 'Mom and Nya don't know how to tell you ONCE AGAIN that they don't want you in that room. I'm not trying to start drama; I just want you to know they said you moved Nya's stuff and threw it on the floor.' This did, however, create drama. Also, what does she mean by 'AGAIN'? And I didn't throw a THING on that floor. My sister literally didn't sleep the whole time because she was so ever so sick that I was in here relaxing with my man who came to visit. So, I did text my mom how I felt, and I told her about how she gets everything, but she wants to say 'bull they say you were the princess' when I was like freaking 5, yeah. What have you really done but make me feel less than the other? So comes morning, and her husband came banging on the door telling me to unlock it (the door was already unlocked. Get a load of this guy.), and I'm GROWN; this man really came at me sideways talking about 'get the f in the living room.' Mind you, I have a past with anxiety; I will faint, and they know this. I don't like arguing. I said, 'No, I'm leaving.' Now I didn't know where I was going to go yet because my boyfriend's mom has all 6 of her kids in the house right now with no space. So I had to call my Poppop the WHOLE time my stepfather would not shut up. (Ohh, brother, this guy stinks.) My mom wouldn't stop screaming, and I got stressed and screamed to just stop, and I started crying because of course, I have anxiety and I'm overwhelmed because its 3 people yelling over something they said i could do. My chest was tight, and I was shaking. Then my mom really had the audacity to tell Nya, 'She don't want u in here because she said u stole.' I told my mom to keep that private. My sister was stealing my underwear, and I told her (funny because I literally JUST bought her some clothes and underwear). I asked her to keep it between us. Oh boy, I won't tell her NOTHING again. I forgot she got a fat mouth. Anyways, I called my grandpa, and I'm his baby, so how could he ever say no? He's the only one that ever cares for me anymore. I felt bad because my mom started crying, so I said, 'I'll be back tomorrow it's ok.' Stupid, I know. Because she didn't care when I was crying and using the inhaler trying to get air.
And might I add, my sister said 'no what did I steal. She can come say it to my face.' I wanted to knock her socks off. She literally left to go to a friend's because I was in the room after she said I could be in there. That should tell you she didn't come to hang out with mom. Everything about her makes me mad. She does stuff that I do, and she thinks I don't notice. She took my style, even my personality, and my interests. Like I'm a hello kitty girl. I wear hello kitty pants, Kuromi bookbags, and just hello kitty anything including my decor. And I paint so I have hello kitty paintings (I'm good at it too), and she happened to all of a sudden like it too. My hairstyles are unique; I do my own thing. She tries to do her hair like mine. All the TV shows and YouTubers I watch, she started all of a sudden liking. At first, it was cute; I thought she looked up to me. Until I realized she's just trying to BE ME, and she doesn't even like me. Anyways, I went to my Poppop and my Nanas, and my mom tried to guilt trip me on Facebook, and I told them everything that happened, and they agree with me that my mom is being unfair, considering I will be there for about 30 days and my sister only 8 times out of the month. I told my mother that now my sister won't be comfortable coming here because she doesn't know how to just shut up and just be a mother. My nana said it was so immature to really tell Facebook that we 'hate' her. Also, can I add that I've only been here 4 days because I went to my Poppop's last night. Then my mom had the audacity to tell me to keep the room clean when it was a mess. Then when I went to clean it, she told me to leave the stuff there. My sister didn't have it clean; it was a mess. I moved out this little fireplace and 2 blankets, and that's literally what they were mad about. Excuse me for cleaning your brown smoked out and molded walls and provided more space. Excuse me for cleaning the bedding that had cat fur all over it because I couldn't breathe. Cry a river.
so aita?

Me, my boyfriend and our friends went for lunch and a drive, on our way home he got a call from his father, that they are going to his sisters place because something has happened and stuff. We both got worried and he then called her sister, she was crying all the time, then he called his mom, his mom told him that her sister fought with her husband and they shouted on each other, basic husband wife fights, nothing major as violence or abuse. My boyfriend got hyper and was driving a little rashly, to get there asap. I get it, I have three sibling and I will happily give my life for them, but he dropped me in rain, when he was going the same way, he got very hyper, forgot that I am way too afraid of lightning. I just felt hurt. I don't know if I should feel this way, but I did. And it's my birthday day after tomorrow and we were about to go out tomorrow, he canceled that too. I don't know I am not getting it, I just felt not important enough or I don't know If he would have dropped me home it would have taken him 3 to 5 extra minutes, that's how near mine and his sister house is.
Tl-dr: Am I overthinking all this? Should I tell him how I felt?

The title should say enough as TL;DR. The longer story is that my bf and I, as well as his friends attended a smaller, more east asian media oriented convention months ago, where he and I cosplayed as Misa and Light a little last minute, but still enjoyed ourselves. Now, the bigger variant would be next month, and my bf (M22) wanted to attend again. My bf and I have talked about this for months, and even when he was over at my birthday, we talked about cosplaying as something I really liked again, just as a way to make it an enjoyable experience for both parties (he's more into the convention thing, and I am into fashion).
So, a few days ago I brought up we should go in june again, to my bf, since nobody at home was really against it and said it'd be fun (I live with my mom and sister, as well as her kid—my nephew). That same day I showed my mom and sister a couple of outfits that Tifa wears, which they said is actually cool, especially my sister (who liked her cowboy one most) cos she plays the games too. Fast forward, my bf gets two tickets, so I'm showing my mom again; hey, I have tickets now, this is what we want to go as. She suddenly starts saying the outfit is too slutty, etc. i said I'd wear safety shorts and my pleated skirt would be longer anyway, as well as the crop top, so she wouldn't have to worry about it, especially because in real life I wear short stuff too. She calls me names, says me going one time was enough, keeps going at it, and I say "okay then I won't go". She keeps this whole thing up, so I just decide to go to my room and close myself up, because I know arguing against her will leave me outside with nothing for hours again (speaking from experience), and I just can't be bothered.
I do the same today, because I just don't understand her problem, she says I shouldn't have allowed my bf to buy tickets before I got consent over what to wear. Which, fair, because I'm middle eastern and that put me in the luck of needing consent for everything, which is where I think I'm the asshole, as well as for ignoring her. But at the same time, I feel like it's completely reasonable I got upset over this too?
I don't party, go out, not even with friends, on dates I constantly text my mom so she knows I am not "doing anything wrong" (as well as me trying to get home early always, and 5 pm already gets her screaming off of her lungs that it's late), I get good grades and only occpuy myself with work and school. I've had recitals for my own music, she's never attended one. At the same time, she polices my body and what I do, and even though I live under her roof, which makes me TA in this situation in her opinion, wouldn't I still be allowed some? Liberty? I feel like a 15 year old asshole even crying about this idk... AITA?
TLDR; Mom won't let me (f21) cosplay as Tifa for a convention because she thinks it's too slutty and I should've told her I wanted to look "like a whore" before letting my boyfriend (m22) buy tickets.

Hello all, long story short, my friend (she is from India and so are her captors/employers) is a victim of "forced labor" human trafficking. She has gone to hell and back in the last 7 years and has finally mustered the strength to leave, I am picking her up tonight at 10:30 p.m. and I am terrified... If you're interested in reading more details about her ordeal, read the long paragraphs below, but in short... my plan is to drive her up to the Indian Consulate in San Francisco, CA (she has recently talked to her sister in India who informed her that this is what she should do in order to go back to India, but what if she's wrong?) which is where she will get help and be on her way to India? Is this correct? I have never done this before and I am not sure what to do... The last thing I want to do is to drive my friend (who has zero money, an expired visa, no passport, speaks broken English, and is extremely vulnerable) to a place where she won't be helped and she has nowhere to turn to.
I met (let's call her Maria) Maria, about 2.5 years ago. We are both vendors at local Farmers markets here in Los Angeles, CA. From the MOMENT I met her, I knew something was very wrong. On my first day arriving at a specific farmers market, she and her boss were my next-booth neighbors. I asked Maria, "Hello, it's my first day here at this market, do you know if I can park at xy street or would I get a ticket??". She looked at me and immediately walked away. Her boss right away stepped up and said "Don't ask her, she wouldn't know, yes you can park at xy street". I thought well that's strange... why did she not let her talk... that girl looks scared. I had never seen such a tired and defeated looking human in my life. Most times her boss left her there to work while she went and worked other markets. Well I got to know maria and she became a very special friend of mine, she is caring, selfless and has all the good traits any good and decent human does. I don't know where to begin with describing what she's gone through. Her English is broken but I can understand 95% of what she tells me. I will try my best but I don't know every single detail.
She knows these people since when she lived back in India with her mom, dad, brothers, sisters. These suspects have businesses here in the U.S and over in India and employ both her father and uncles. They told Maria that they had an opportunity for her if she was interested. There was a man who was looking for a wife and they had told this man about Maria, he was interested. The plan was for Maria to travel to the U.S, marry this man, and employment with these suspects was guaranteed. Since her life was hard over there, she was intrigued and accepted. When she arrived they gave her the runaround...seems there was never a man for her to marry, instead they had her work endlessly on their business that is ran from a remote farming community here in Southern California. They threatened her by telling her they'd hurt her family back in India AND they'd lose their jobs, they'd hurt her, they'd do this, they'd do that. They have beaten her so many times, I've seen the bruises and begged her to let me take pictures that I would keep privately (but for proof if in the future they were needed) but every time I would ask, she'd always immediately refuse and said she'd have hell to pay if they found out. They have told her that she will never talk to her family back in India and she has not been able to do so since she left India.
They have her sleep inside a barn with the animals. They humiliate her, the husband and wife (and sister of wife) hit her so often and even broke her nose once. You can actually see where her nose healed crooked. There's been times where I did not see her for 2 or 3 weeks straight and sure enough, it was because she had some sort of injury she was healing (black eye, etc.). She has ran away several times only to go back several hours later because she has nowhere to go and is scared shitless. She basically works 24/7 too. She is not allowed to talk to anyone and when she and I are both at the same market (and her boss is dropping her off) we have to pretend to not know each other. Her boss picks her (and the equipment) up from the farmers market sometimes at 5-6 p.m. Mind you... all us other vendors have left at 2pm. So she just waits and waits to be picked up. She is not allowed to have ANY technology. She is not able to watch TV (she doesn't live inside a house anyway), when I was getting to know her... i realized she doesn't even know what is going on in the world (doesn't even know school shootings exist in this country). Her captors go through her things, they get extremely upset if vendor friends gift her items, (little pastries, gifts, etc. that they sell) or make conversation with her. For Christmas, my birthday, any holiday, she will go out of her way to give me a little gift (even if it's an insignificant little thing like a nail polish etc.) and she has given me her food when she knows I'm having a hard day and I'm upset (she knows I deal with an abusive husband and we bond over our difficult experiences) just to cheer me up. Little by little I have convinced her that she can trust me and that I would drive her to the airport and pay for her ticket, etc to get her back to India and escape from this abuse. I got her a cell phone that she only uses for internet that she has to keep hidden. Well with that cell phone and apps she was finally able to contact her family. She said that they said that they had not had jobs with these people for years and basically all the fear they put into her was B.S. They have for years been looking for her. She's still scared shitless but she says she cannot take it anymore. I have lost sleep over what my friend goes through. I don't know anyone who has suffered as much as she has. Again, what I described above is not all she has shared with me.. it's worse.
She doesn't want me to meet her at the ranch where she lives because she fears for my safety. She worries they will do something to me out of desperation (because they might be facing legal issues now), so I have to meet her in front of a store tonight, she will walk hours to get there. She doesn't trust the police, the last time she ran away she flagged down the police, told them the situation and basically said hey you don't have proof, there's not much we could do. I'd imagine that this distrust for the police is shared in these migrant-rich farming communities. I recently got a new job (in order to leave my own abusive relationship) and I will have to miss work to take her there, which I'm willing to do, I just want to make sure that we are going about this the right away. I also have two little kids at home (6 and 4 y.os) I am willing to pay for her ticket...I can make that money back. But gosh... I'm terrified. All these government offices are closed right now, since it's the weekend. I will make so many calls early tomorrow to make sure I know what my friend is getting herself into. Does anyone here have any advice? Tips? Anything that might be helpful.
I really hope she presses charges and these people pay for what they have done but I am discouraged by the fear I see in her. I can't blame her. I look forward to seeing their business crumble as they no longer have her endless help. Thanks for reading all this..

My birthday was this past Friday and I just wanted to share what my wife and sister got me. Harry's shield bracelet, the splattercon shirt and a model of the Blue Beetle that my wife painted herself. They also got tickets for Comicpalooza, which Jim Butcher is attending this year!!

I have a 26mo who is speech delayed, up until his 2nd birthday he exclusively said “hi” and “yeah.” Currently he has some words he says that are clearly words, but for the most part he talks with his mouth closed.
He very rarely talks without prompting and never independently asks or interacts verbally. However, he repeats A LOT. Just again, in his throat like a hum kind of? When he does this he can even repeat back 2-3 word phrases. For example if Im talking to his baby sister and say “Come here name” he’ll hum it as well.
We’re working with developmental therapy while we sit on the speech waitlist. She said it could be a sensory thing, like it feels nice and soothing for him. He is almost always “mmmm”-ing while he plays, so that makes sense.
Anyone else have experience with this?

We’ve been exclusive for four months now and it’s been close to six months since our first date. My gf hosted a breakfast for her friends when her sister was in town. Her sister had hinted me that my gf’s friends are a lot to handle. I didn’t really had the context so I didn’t give it much thought. At the breakfast there were 8-10 people and other than introducing each other anyone barely talked to me and tried to have a conversation. Out of these 10 people two were her best friends and all her friends have known each other for 10-12 years. I felt very insecure after and I did discuss this with my gf. She said it might be a one off situation but they’re not like this. Met them all again at a birthday dinner party and the birthday person didn’t even make an eye contact with me neither her husband who hosted the dinner. Other than exchanges of hi how are you nothing more. I’m very hurt by this and to top this my gf asked to go out for a pool day with the same group and I said I’m not going cause I feel unwelcomed which hurts my self respect. She was okay with it but she still ended up going. Idk for some reason this action by her is making me overthink she doesn’t validate my feelings. I’ve made her meet my friends and they’ve been nothing but sweet to her. Having genuine conversations and getting to know her so they can give their opinion on stuff I might not be noticing. I feel this is important for your friends to do at least subtly. Her friends doesn’t seem to be interested in her partner at all and me being asked to go to things with her where I know I’ll not be acknowledged seems very demanding. And when she still ends up going my ego is getting hurt.
What am I missing here? Or am I overthinking and making this too big of a deal? If someone disrespects my partner I’d seriously evaluate my friendship with them. If my friends don’t want the best for me why even go out with them.

My husband and I were high school sweethearts and got married very young (I was 19), but more on that later.
For now, backstory: we both come from rather toxic families and are both black sheep. The difference being I realized early on and my husband, being very sweet and naïve at times, didn’t realize his until I started pointing it out. My intentions were never to alienate his family, however, I’ve never liked the way they treated him. Especially his mother’s side.
One of the biggest examples that comes to mind was how he worked over the summer for his Aunt one year before we even met, and instead of giving the money to him, the money was given to his mom‘s parents who kept it in an account “for him“ that he couldn’t access. Later, they bought him a car with it, but put it in their name. When I found out, I immediately pointed out that that was kind of messed up, it’s nice that he got a car, but that money should’ve been given to him and at the very least the car should have been in his name. But as he usually does, he chose to see the bright side of things, so for the most part he was just happy that he had a car. Fast-forward a year or two, and he was driving up most weekends to visit me in college when he wasn’t working (about 1 1/2 hours each way, so not very far by Texas standards), when his grandparents decided that they didn’t like that and they tried to stop him, but that argument didn’t last very long and they relented. It wasn’t until they started telling him that he couldn’t visit his dad using the car that things really got dicey.
And it’s not like his dad lived very far, he lived in the same neighborhood as his mom, and in the same neighborhood that we had grown up in. And this time they would not relent, they absolutely despise his father. The divorce was messy and even though neither is completely blameless, she definitely had the worst offenses. Just trust me on that. Since then, it’s like she never learned how to be an adult and has been a perpetual 16-year-old, always complaining about everything and with her parents always holding the purse strings (though you could argue it’s always been that way, her parents paid for her schooling to be a dance major and she never did anything with that, they defended her bad decisions during the divorce, paid the mortgage on her large house afterwards, and even now after expressing how much she doesn’t enjoy being around her parents, she refuses to leave and still lives with a family member).
Anyways, after his grandparents threatened to take away the car (which he used for work as a pizza delivery man and obviously his mom didn’t stand up for him) if he tried to visit his dad, he let his dad know and I helped him move out of his mom‘s house that night while she was at work. It made him terribly unhappy at first, especially to leave his younger siblings behind, but he knew what they were doing was wrong, and he was over 18 and thats simply a line you don’t cross. His dad baught him a car to use.
It should be noted that he likely would not have said anything to his father or moved out if I hadn’t pushed him to, and that’s probably why a good portion of his family aren’t really big fans of mine. Even several years after we were married and possibly even to this day, they think I make all of the decisions in our relationship and force him to do what makes me happy even if he doesn’t want to, which of course is not the case, we discuss and agree on every major decision. When I was pregnant with our son, our first child, we were at his dad‘s mom‘s house and I was often sitting and asking him to get things for me and the like and he ended up going to get food with one of his sisters and she literally told him that she didn’t like how I was constantly asking him to do things and I wasn’t doing anything for myself. The pregnancy was very hard on me, I LOST 11 lbs and had to work the whole time and had no paid leave, so yes I tried to relax as much as I could. These are just a few examples of their behavior, his mother and her parents are also often emotionally and psychologically manipulative and abusive, comparing him to his cousins which they often consider “more successful“ especially since he decided he didn’t want to be a doctor and wanted to work in a lab instead, and anytime he tries to argue back with his mom she does the whole “I guess I’m just a horrible mom“ thing. Something I am very well familiar with in my own life. Needless to say, I am not the biggest fan of his family.
I did one year of my university before I decided it wasn’t the right path for me and about that time he was about finished with community college and was looking to go to university next. He ended up getting excepted into the university that I had gone to, but didn’t really want to move into the dorms as someone who was older than most freshman, but also couldn’t afford an apartment on his own. So we decided that we would get married and move up there together, we were already engaged as he proposed to me on my 18th birthday. It was the perfect set up as being under the same roof as my mother again really sucked.
I don’t quite remember why we decided to get married three months from that point, it was kind of stressful. But during that time him and his mother had another huge falling out, of course with her parents being on her side, and the deal with the car was still fresh in everyone’s minds. After that I didn’t want her at the wedding, or her parents, and while it did upset him a bit(notice a trend? He is very sweet and has a tender heart and is a recovering people-pleaser) he agreed that it would just be unnecessary drama.
It was a very small wedding as my parents gave me $2000 and I used half of that on a weekend honeymoon and the other half to cover the cupcakes and the photographer (who was an old friend of ours from high school). My youth pastor who at this point also knew my (soon to be) husband was the officiant and graciously let us use the foyer the youth building free of charge for the ceremony. This was a small neighborhood church so the room wasn’t very big but we weren’t inviting a ton of people so we were fine with it, especially since it was mostly windows and it was pretty nice especially since we didn’t have to pay for it. We ended up inviting both sets of my parents, my sister and her small family, and my little sister and my mom‘s parents. (note the parents, siblings, and my closest grandparents) In the end, after his mother begged, we did end up letting her come, and then of course his father came and his siblings and his father‘s mom. (Note the parents, siblings, and his closest grandparent). Our closest friends were there which was 6 people, and then my small group from church had spent the night decorating the foyer for the ceremony so of course they were invited too. The numbers were slightly skewed in my favor as both of my parents have remarried, my sister was married with 2 kids, and both of my grandparents were still alive at the time. So yes, technicality he had less people there, but he told me that he didn’t mind after I pointed this out to him back when we were talking about who to invite. And his family really didn’t like this. We both have large families. Only mine was scattered to the four winds and his lived exclusively in Texas. If his mom‘s parents hadn’t been treating him like dirt I happily would’ve invited them too, and seeing as I didn’t even invite my step sisters who had been in my life since I was two, I didn’t think it would be appropriate to invite his cousins, especially since the room was plenty full as it was. Again, he understood and was OK with all of this.
In the end, it was very sweet and small and the reception just took place at one of our favorite restaurants.
To this day, he still catches flack for more of his family not being invited, especially is mom’s parents, and we are always told by third parties about things his family say about us and especially me. (one of them even called me a gold digger, even though at the time was working at Domino’s. His mom told us she was the only one who “stood up for me” in that moment, but the best response she could come up with was “my son doesn’t have money“).
I have no qualms about what we did. We have since moved halfway across the country, recently celebrated our 8 year anniversary, and are very happy. The things they say still weigh on us though, so I was hoping to prove a point with this post.
So, are we the assholes for not inviting most of my husband’s family to the wedding?

Hello all, long story short, my friend (she is from India and so are her captors/employers) is a victim of "forced labor" human trafficking. She has gone to hell and back in the last 7 years and has finally mustered the strength to leave, I am picking her up tonight at 10:30 p.m. and I am terrified... If you're interested in reading more details about her ordeal, read the long paragraphs below, but in short... my plan is to drive her up to the Indian Consulate in San Francisco, CA (she has recently talked to her sister in India who informed her that this is what she should do in order to go back to India, but what if she's wrong?) which is where she will get help and be on her way to India? Is this correct? I have never done this before and I am not sure what to do... The last thing I want to do is to drive my friend (who has zero money, an expired visa, no passport, speaks broken English, and is extremely vulnerable) to a place where she won't be helped and she has nowhere to turn to.
I met (let's call her Maria) Maria, about 2.5 years ago. We are both vendors at local Farmers markets here in Los Angeles, CA. From the MOMENT I met her, I knew something was very wrong. On my first day arriving at a specific farmers market, she and her boss were my next-booth neighbors. I asked Maria, "Hello, it's my first day here at this market, do you know if I can park at xy street or would I get a ticket??". She looked at me and immediately walked away. Her boss right away stepped up and said "Don't ask her, she wouldn't know, yes you can park at xy street". I thought well that's strange... why did she not let her talk... that girl looks scared. I had never seen such a tired and defeated looking human in my life. Most times her boss left her there to work while she went and worked other markets. Well I got to know maria and she became a very special friend of mine, she is caring, selfless and has all the good traits any good and decent human does. I don't know where to begin with describing what she's gone through. Her English is broken but I can understand 95% of what she tells me. I will try my best but I don't know every single detail.
She knows these people since when she lived back in India with her mom, dad, brothers, sisters. These suspects have businesses here in the U.S and over in India and employ both her father and uncles. They told Maria that they had an opportunity for her if she was interested. There was a man who was looking for a wife and they had told this man about Maria, he was interested. The plan was for Maria to travel to the U.S, marry this man, and employment with these suspects was guaranteed. Since her life was hard over there, she was intrigued and accepted. When she arrived they gave her the runaround...seems there was never a man for her to marry, instead they had her work endlessly on their business that is ran from a remote farming community here in Southern California. They threatened her by telling her they'd hurt her family back in India AND they'd lose their jobs, they'd hurt her, they'd do this, they'd do that. They have beaten her so many times, I've seen the bruises and begged her to let me take pictures that I would keep privately (but for proof if in the future they were needed) but every time I would ask, she'd always immediately refuse and said she'd have hell to pay if they found out. They have told her that she will never talk to her family back in India and she has not been able to do so since she left India.
They have her sleep inside a barn with the animals. They humiliate her, the husband and wife (and sister of wife) hit her so often and even broke her nose once. You can actually see where her nose healed crooked. There's been times where I did not see her for 2 or 3 weeks straight and sure enough, it was because she had some sort of injury she was healing (black eye, etc.). She has ran away several times only to go back several hours later because she has nowhere to go and is scared shitless. She basically works 24/7 too. She is not allowed to talk to anyone and when she and I are both at the same market (and her boss is dropping her off) we have to pretend to not know each other. Her boss picks her (and the equipment) up from the farmers market sometimes at 5-6 p.m. Mind you... all us other vendors have left at 2pm. So she just waits and waits to be picked up. She is not allowed to have ANY technology. She is not able to watch TV (she doesn't live inside a house anyway), when I was getting to know her... i realized she doesn't even know what is going on in the world (doesn't even know school shootings exist in this country). Her captors go through her things, they get extremely upset if vendor friends gift her items, (little pastries, gifts, etc. that they sell) or make conversation with her. For Christmas, my birthday, any holiday, she will go out of her way to give me a little gift (even if it's an insignificant little thing like a nail polish etc.) and she has given me her food when she knows I'm having a hard day and I'm upset (she knows I deal with an abusive husband and we bond over our difficult experiences) just to cheer me up. Little by little I have convinced her that she can trust me and that I would drive her to the airport and pay for her ticket, etc to get her back to India and escape from this abuse. I got her a cell phone that she only uses for internet that she has to keep hidden. Well with that cell phone and apps she was finally able to contact her family. She said that they said that they had not had jobs with these people for years and basically all the fear they put into her was B.S. They have for years been looking for her. She's still scared shitless but she says she cannot take it anymore. I have lost sleep over what my friend goes through. I don't know anyone who has suffered as much as she has. Again, what I described above is not all she has shared with me.. it's worse.
She doesn't want me to meet her at the ranch where she lives because she fears for my safety. She worries they will do something to me out of desperation (because they might be facing legal issues now), so I have to meet her in front of a store tonight, she will walk hours to get there. She doesn't trust the police, the last time she ran away she flagged down the police, told them the situation and basically said hey you don't have proof, there's not much we could do. I'd imagine that this distrust for the police is shared in these migrant-rich farming communities. I recently got a new job (in order to leave my own abusive relationship) and I will have to miss work to take her there, which I'm willing to do, I just want to make sure that we are going about this the right away. I also have two little kids at home (6 and 4 y.os) I am willing to pay for her ticket...I can make that money back. But gosh... I'm terrified. All these government offices are closed right now, since it's the weekend. I will make so many calls early tomorrow to make sure I know what my friend is getting herself into. Does anyone here have any advice? Tips? Anything that might be helpful.
I really hope she presses charges and these people pay for what they have done but I am discouraged by the fear I see in her. I can't blame her. I look forward to seeing their business crumble as they no longer have her endless help. Thanks for reading all this..

I posted on here before that my sister Mellissa losing her kids she has 7 in total katelynne is 19 kay din is 13 Lillianna is 11 Miracle is 6 zanders are 8 and Ransom and Rytheme are 2 years old today is their birthday the whole problem started in 2019 when Melissa found her old crush from school his name is Aron.
Aron and Melissa are dating i knew from day one I didn't like him he was controlling in my eyes all he ever did was tell Melissa what to do I noticed this when we all gathered at my sister Jessica's house early for Christmas since she wouldn't be in town
Jessica is married to a Mexican who I adore his name is Andres so normally every other Christmas and summer she would go with her son to Mexico to spend time with his family we were having a good time until he began texting and calling Melissa
he had been living with her that next year in 2020 we found out some disturbing things Melissa didn't want to get pregnant again so she had an IUD inserted in her arm to prevent her from getting pregnant what Aron would do was squeeze her arm to break the IUD so he can get her pregnant
In April of 2020, I moved into my sister's house i was previously living with my mom under her landlord's radar until I got accused of stealing clothes which is ridiculous and then I got banned so I moved into my oldest sister's Jessica house
Just a few days after moving in my sister Jessica came into my room and told me that Aron had beat up Melissa and it was bad she had bruises and gashes all over her from her beating on her and DCFS had gotten involved
DCFS told her that if she did not get rid of Aron she would have no choice but to take her kids away because of what happened his kids also displayed abuse his son was violent and his daughter would sit there and watch as Zander who is Autisic was getting dressed disturbing
Then in May of 2021 Ransom and Rytheme were born Ransom was born with Cleft feet while Rytheme was normal but Aron's control over her got worse during this time we got calls from the kids more and more often asking for Jessica to come to get them because they were scared
Aron and Melissa were fighting again Melissa was also an alcoholic so they would fight when they were mostly drunk is when the fights they both wanted to run the household when it should have been Melissa since it was her house
Then 2022 started we did not hear much of Melissa leading up to this year she came over on Christmas and it seemed she was still under his control she would pick up immediately after he would call this worried us because she was pregnant
January nothing February nothing then March happened Kaydon her 12 year old called us saying Melissa was drinking again and that he found an empty vodka bottle in her trash can we told him to tell his bio dad stevie and Stevie told her case worker
this was March 2nd of 2022 that year was very eventful if you ask me multiple false police calls from her on us threats from Aron stalking us because he didn't like that we had his kids and multiple false reports to DCFS from her about us citing that we were abusing the kids
all reports came back unfounded of the course she also posted on Facebook slandering Jessica saying that she always wanted her to have her kids taken away which wasnt true she had gotten her kids taken away and then we had to immediately find babysitters for the babies
Jessica worked so did Andres and I and Jessica had a deal when I moved in that i didn't have to babysit if I didn't want to as you can tell babysitting 2 infants a 5-year-old and a 7-year-old autistic child was not an easy thing to do
At first, our babysitter Brooklyn just quit babysitting Zander saying his meltdowns were way to much and then she quit watching the babies so i took over it was from April- to October of 2022 in between that time I had given a lot of my time up to babysitting i never got a day off
on top of making sure I fed and changed the babies while making sure the older kids got to bed on time I had to also clean the house and this was proven to be too stressful on me the fact Jessica's son Zion would always contradict me this would lead to fights we had
In August of 2022, they went on vacation for 6 days and this was a saving grace for me since i got 6 whole days to myself in September of 2022 I had gotten into a fight with Zion her husband was supposed to be off that day but he went somewhere with the older kids
so it was just me Zion and the babies Zion wanted to watch tv i said no he tried to snatch the remote from me and a fight happened the fight got so heated because he kept trying to follow me around if i went into the kitchen where he was the livingroom there he was the bathroom there he was
Finally, i went outside and he tried grabbing me until the neighbor came out he then went inside and locked me out of the house twice once back inside I yelled WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU, YOU DONT HAVE A RIGHT TO LOCK ME OUT AND THERE ARE BABIES IN THE HOUSE!!!" he then shoved me so I called Jessica
Jessica sped home and she laid it on him thick saying that she was taking his game until he learned to keep his hands off of me Andres came just in time to see him try and put his hands on Jessica and he beat up Zion Jessica had to pull him off of Zion
the next two months he just went on walks until his mom would be home until October I was putting all the same colors of play dough in the same container and my vape was by the tv so I could just grab it and go outside he purposely knocked it to the ground
I asked him about it and he blamed the 5-year-old for it but there were 2 problems to this story 1 -I had it scooted back to where the 5-year-old couldn't reach the vape and 2- the 5-year-old is smarter than most and knows not to touch it
this is when the final fight happened Andres had already left for work and Jessica was already at work I didn't want to fight with him so I told him to stop but he didn't want to be kept it up he started following me around the house but this time I chose to ignore I got hungry
so I went to grab a knife and a potato so I could cut up a potato i can make myself a baked potato and he grabbed a knife of his own this made me feel threatened so I called Jessica no answer i texted Jessica no answer so then I tried his andres I called him no answer I texted him no answer this was after I told the older kids to go to the playroom
after no answer, I called the police the police came Zions Dimbass went outside with the knife to talk to the police I told the officer what happened and he told his side of the story too not long after they left Jessica came home instead of her yelling at Zion for starting a fight she yelled at me
so the next day Jerry told me he wanted me to come to the hills and talk to him and at the same time I felt like she was going to make me move out she said she would pick Melissa's kids over me every time which upset me
so I went and got papers for Indian Hills and signed them she tried to backtrack as soon as DCFS said it was unfounded but I told her I did not want to babysit anymore so she had Stevie and Jen babysit This only lasted a month so November thru December
after they quit it was Ricky Katenynnes boyfriend who babysat Kateynee came now and then to help out but she had her job and Ricky did not follow any rules Jessica had some strict rules when it came to ways to babysit the baby
such as cleaning up the mess and not vaping around the babies if one of the kids is sick keeping them away from the babies and letting the babies sleep whenever they wanted Jessica didn't want them sleeping past 5 pm so they would have a sleep schedule
After Ricky quit due to him accusing Zion of looking up porn on the internet on one of the kid's tablets and being told that maybe he was the one doing it then Jessica tried to pressure me into babysitting again even though in October we sat down in the kitchen and i told her how I felt
then she told me she understood the deal we made and that the only time that she would ask me to babysit was for school stuff and doctor appointments and when she went to the boat that's what she calls the casino so she had to quit her job at the restraint so that she didn't have to worry
January and February we were living off of food pantries and behind on bills then mom mentioned on Addus and working for Travis and so she signed up went to orientation and now she works for Travis
now for the update :
last day of court was today and they told Melissa she will not be getting her kids back She is back on medicine and she is doing her classes but the one thing she was not doing was accepting the fact that it was Aron who got her kids taken
thank you Reddit for joining me on this wild ride

IATA ???? Claire and I have been best friends for almost 7 years. we met in college while both being premed. I was able to get into medical school on my first try while she tried over 3 times without success and works in insurance now. She got engaged to her boyfriend as she was trying to apply to medical school for a 4th time. By then I was ending my second year of medical school and about to start my third year of medical school. Unfortunately, also during this time my then serious live in boyfriend(who was also a medical student) of 2 years died unexpectedly in an accident. I was devastated.
Claire was very supportive at first, but very quickly started to pull away from me and only wanted to talk to me about her wedding. She was always busy when I tried to make plans and was away during my Birthday, and even told me she could not be around me while I was grieving because she needed to keep her life going and plan a wedding and I was making her too sad. She spent this entire year preparing her wedding, I was one of the bridesmaids, and she multiple times showed concern that I was not as involved in the wedding preparations or responding to emails as quickly as she would have liked. One time while drunk during her bachelorette she called me a bitch for not responding to emails quickly, later denying she had any recollection of calling me that. I didn’t mean to not respond quickly It was a combinations of multiple things. Her sister was made of honor and I had a pretty busy 80 hrs per week schedule and could not answer 20 emails per week about approving the menu for the bachelorette dinner or if I preferred shorts versus pants Pijamas, or to choose what colors I wanted to wear. Looking back at it now it would have taken only a few seconds to respond but at the time I was so overwhelmed with school, studying for boards and my own personal grieving that responding to an email about choosing between lilac and violet for the bridesmaids dresses felt like a huge task. I made this clear to her and told her look I can’t be as involved in the planning but I would be happy to go along with anything you want or your sister chooses. Despite all of this I helped her picked her dress and went to multiple appointments with her and also Attended and paid my way to Her bachelorette. Even though I was a broke medical student. All the bridesmaids had a plus one for the wedding. I was planning on bringing my sister but she had a last minute work commitment she couldn’t get out off. Claire told me she preferred if I didn’t bring anyone she knew but didn’t invite to her wedding, but I explained to her that I was actually scared of going to her wedding alone, and at this point we had a lot of mutual friends so my options were limited. And she mostly invited other couples so most of our single friends/acquaintances were off limits. I was still grieving and I was afraid I would burst into tears. I made it clear that I was happy for her wedding but it was also very triggering since we both had started dating our respective partners at the same time and moved in together at the same etc, and while she was getting engaged I had to grieve the death of mine. She accused me of being jealous of her. I tried to explain to her it wasn’t jealousy but grief because attending a wedding was very triggering for me. She gave me the option of not attending her wedding if it was that hard. I told her that I felt I could attend if I could bring a plus one for support. Since she did not want me to bring someone she knew but didn’t invited to the wedding, I brought a very old childhood friend of mine that I had become closer with during the last year. He had reached out when he heard the news of my boyfriend passing away and for the last year had been checking on me regularly. We had always been good friends and he had gotten divorce during the same time so we started to talk often and support each other. He offered to fly in and be my plus one if I didn’t have anyone to come with (he lived across the country at that time) Claire made it clear that she was also not not happy with me having a plus one that she didn’t know and told me that I could bring him as long as I should be aware that I could not cater to my date since I had bridesmaid responsibilities that day. I assure her it would not be a problem.
I missed the rehearsal dinner the prior night because I had a medical school test that afternoon and then had to drive 5 hours to the wedding site I told her about this in advance. Didn’t make it until midnight. I woke up bright and early and went to the bridal suite. Had breakfast and hung out with the other bridesmaids for a bit. I then went back to my room to get ready and shower and this took maybe a couple of hours. When I arrive to the bridal suite she was getting her make up done and was clearly upset, she spent the entire rest of the evening upset and giving me the cold shoulder. I thought it was just nerves. The wedding ended and I headed back home and I texted her to thank her for everything etc. And also to apologize for not being as involved with the planning as I would have liked. She responded by accusing me of being jealous of her for getting married and purposely trying to sabotage her wedding. She accused me of making up a fake medical school exam and arriving to her wedding early but refusing to attend the rehearsal dinner, she also accused me of taking too long to get ready purposefully to avoid her and hanging out with my date way too much instead of the bridal party. She then Told me I used her wedding as an excuse to have a fling instead of focusing on her. And she then told me I had a lot of personal work to do and I have fucked up priorities in life.I tried to explain to her than none of those things happened and I have no idea where is getting all those conclusions , to no avail. She is no longer talking to me and blocked me from all social media. Worth to notice I have tried to reach out and nothing. And I heard from a mutual friend she did not get into medical school again and her now husband prohibit her from trying a fifth time since it was a huge financial strain and he wants to focus on having a family. AITA for not being a more involved bridesmaid and bringing a plus one or is she being unreasonable? I had never had this happened before with a friend. One of my other really close medical school friends is getting married next month and I am also a bridesmaid and I have had none of these issues with her.

Sorry if this not well written, I don´t come from a English speaking country.
This made me really sad and upset. I (21) come from a large family, I love them a lot so this situation hurt me. I have a cousin (21F) that I will call Maia that had her birthday last week. We were supposed to go celebrate the exact same they her birthday was as a family, but ultimately got cancelled.
All of this started the day before her birthday. It was a Friday, we both go to the same university but we are studying different things, have mixed schedules and can only see each other that day because we both get out of class late and her mom takes me home (she takes me because my mom asked her to).
So the trip got cancelled days before because my mother wanted to take all the family to her birthday celebration and she did not wanted it to happen. So I asked her if she wanted her gift right then and there or if there was a possibility of seeing each other the next day at a smaller celebration or something and she told me to give it to her tomorrow since we were going to a bowling alley together so I complied and put the gift back in my backpack. She also told me that the celebration that got cancelled wasn't really cancelled but postponed to the end of the month so everyone could go together. I didn't think much of it because I thought she was not that type of person and waited for her mom to pick us up and we both went home. the next day we were supposed to leave at the afternoon slash night because she works the morning shifts I decided to ask her when we were leaving around the hour that she was leaving work so I didn't interfere with her performance and I had time to work in school projects and other stuff to make my evening free. She and her mom were supposed to pick me up since I don't drive and they agreed to it the night before but she answered me 3 hours later telling me that they were going to the bowling alley and that they had already left so they were going without me. I felt hurt Because if they told me earlier I could figure out a way to go with them without having them to pick me up but she decided to tell me when she was already there I didn't say anything and I wish her a happy birthday and to have a great time and I decided to go to sleep early.
Later in the week I went with my mom and my aunt to the supermarket and they were talking about the issue they were upset too because they never told anyone about the trip not the planification not that it was cancelled and then rescheduled nobody knew anything they learn by accident because they were talking in the living room and people heard them talking about it and ask about the matter. they were saying that every time we go out and they are not able to go out with us my mom always finds a way to take all the immediate family by paying or rescheduling or changing her schedule at work to make it work for everyone so having them been secretive in trying to leave without anyone and then like telling lies to others was kind of suspicious. I didn't say anything at the moment because sometimes you do want to go out without all your family but come on you were talking loudly about something in front of the people that you were trying not to take with you to a trip at least be secretive about it.
I was planning to give my cousin her birthday gift the next Friday when I saw her after my classes but my classes got cancelled so I did not see her that day, And today I learned that the trip that got rescheduled for the end of the month so everyone in the family could go together happened today and only her and the people that were actually excluding the rest of the family went together. I was talking to her during the week because I think of her as a sister, so again I felt very hurt because she didn't tell me anything and people had been telling me that I shouldn't give her her gift. Our mutual friends find all the situation weird and suspicious and are telling me that maybe I shouldn't give her anything since she decided to not tell me anything about the trip and the places that they were going together. I have been thinking about it too because the fact that she told me twice about trips and then decided to leave without me and tell me afterwards that they were going without me it's kinda hurtful because why would you tell me in the 1st place if you then are going to live without me? don't tell me and it would be fine if you go without me but don't tell me to go and then leave without me.
Sorry if its difficult to read,I really don't know what to do, because she is still my cousin and even if she doesn't feel the same i love her dearly, but the situation it's very weird.

The mysterious gothic woman of STARRY’s PA booth, PA-san was never properly introduced. She is just always… there… as Seika’s ever-present shadow. Only ever called by her job title we don't even know her actual name.
I dug through the manga, anime, and Kikuri spinoff to see what all I could find on this enigmatic character. If there is any external official information about PA-san I missed then please let me know. Chapteepisode references are included where I could (manga: [#] anime: [ep#] spinoff: [s#]). There is some discussion of the PA/Seika ship.
Appearance: PA-san has long black hair and is one of the taller characters in the series. Like Bocchi, she is actually also one of the most well-endowed characters in the series ‘though it is also normally hard to tell due to how she dresses [75]. She likes to wear long dark clothes, has multiple piercings in both ears + one on her lower lip, and (‘though not directly seen in the main series yet?) has a split tongue [s12]. It feels likely that her habit of sometimes covering her mouth with her sleeve when speaking is to hide her tongue. She appears to be left-handed, which is easiest to see in how she holds her chopsticks in the anime [ep8].
It has long been noticed by fans that PA-san and Seika both wear a black choker almost all the time. It is unknown if there is a deeper reason for this or if it is just a coincidence. For what it is worth, we don’t see either of them wearing a choker in any of the flashbacks we’ve gotten so it does seem be a relatively recent addition to their fashion. That being said, their chokers aren’t exactly matching. PA-san’s sometimes has a ring attached to its front; in the manga Seika’s is consistently a bit thinner than PA-san’s while in the anime it just a bit lighter in color instead. It can also be noted there are also several other characters who wear chokers, most notably SIDEROS’s Tsuki (always) and Akubi (sometimes) [27]. Even Nijika and Kita’s outfits sometimes include one.
Personal life: Her exact age is unknown but she relates well with the other adults in their late 20's/early 30's. As a child she was quite active and sporty [75] but she ended up failing out of high school in her first year due to not being able to wake up early in the mornings. Even now this is hard for her to do which is why she likes night jobs [26]. Being low energy in general, PA-san is perhaps the least active of the main adult trio, preferring to simply observe the amusing antics going on around her. Along with Seika and Hiroi, she feels detached from normal adult society and is somewhat envious of the youthful girls. PA-san is especially self-conscious about her skin condition [26, s4]. She lives alone and is pretty lonely [38]. Outside of working at STARRY, she also livestreams playing video games as a VTuber under the name Otogi Alto (音戯アルト; the kanji for Otogi might be read literally as “sound-play”) [39]. Through that identity she became good online pals with SICKHACK’s Eliza as her oshi [s12]. Although PA-san comes off as the gentlest and most stable of the adults, she is able to be quite ruthless with a smile [24] and is just as capable of mood swings as the others.
STARRY: PA-san is the most trusted (and apparently only other adult) member of Seika’s staff. At the start of the series STARRY had opened up just “recently” so it seems likely PA-san has been employed there from the very beginning [1]. PA-san’s role as the… well… PA means she has perhaps the most technical job. But beyond that she backs up Seika by stepping in when any troubles arise (like when Yami was stirring things up) [23-4] and interpreting her tsundere-speak [ep5]. PA-san seems to find great amusement in observing Seika. She shows little fear towards her employer, regularly poking her about her soft spot for Nijika/Bocchi/Kessoku Band, calling her out on irrational behavior, and able to go as far as smashing a cake in her face without much hesitation [40].
In saying all of this, they do not really show obvious signs of being close outside of a professional relationship. It seems unlikely they knew each other before Seika hired her seeing how Seika didn’t learn of PA-san’s childhood until recently [75] and PA-san likewise hasn’t shown familiarity with Seika’s past. It is even technically unconfirmed if Seika herself remembers PA-san’s real name. As her employer Seika HAS to know PA-san’s name to some extent but we’ve never seen her use it. At the same time, Seika has also doesn't call her “PA-san” like the others, instead seemingly only using impersonal pronouns. There is a point in the manga where Seika could be calling her “PA-san” [26], but in context I think it is Kikuri speaking. In the end, it seems likely that Seika really does know her name and would use it rather than calling her "PA-san" but is too gruff to ever do so. On her part, PA-san similarly only ever calls Seika “Manager”, something Seika insists on even with her sister.
Various anime differences:
PA-san must've been pretty well liked by the anime staff because she was actually given several additional appearances and small interactions in the anime, which mostly solidify her identity as Seika’s shadow. Then in general, PA-san is always wearing a choker unlike in the manga where there are a few times she isn’t wearing it even at STARRY and, like Bocchi, her body’s proportions were made much more subdued in the anime's art style.

• OP: She appears in three places: 1) Standing behind Seika waving her arm. 2) In the background of (1) they seem to be back-to-back as her pierced ear and dark hair can be briefly seen before Seika and her gaze completely takes over the screen. 3) Standing near Seika at STARRY’s bar.
• Ep2: While Seika is watching Nijika freak out over Bocchi, PA-san mentions to her it looks like things will be fun with Bocchi around.
• Ep3: PA-san smells then compliments Kita on her shampoo.
• Ep5: PA-san stops looking at her phone to observe the Ijichi sibling drama. When Ryo shows Seika the picture of her sleeping with a stuffed animal, PA-san slinks up behind them to take a look herself and calls it cute. She giggles at Bocchi acting like a dog. PA-san watches Kessoku Band’s audition along with Seika and translates her tsundere-speech for them.
• Ep8: PA-san joins in the afterparty where she can be seen quietly drinking some kind of purple beverage next to Seika. Her one line is disagreeing with Seika that rather than Bocchi’s weird faces being scary they have got personality.
• Ep12: As her final appearance, PA-san seems to sense Seika getting excited about Bocchi’s surprise birthday present.

Despite the many additions, there were also a few appearances in the manga that did not make it into the anime.

• Ep8: Many of the teru teru bouzu Bocchi had made were really quite terrifying, so upon first entering STARRY, PA-san asks Seika when she had turned the place into a haunted house [12].
• Ep9: We see Nijika talking music and food with PA-san [14]. Along with most of the rest of this chapter about the girls studying for exams, the adults displaying their uselessness in helping the girls study got cut [16].

[Shipping discussion. Feel free to ignore.] I personally like the PA/Seika ship. They are almost always seen together, have interesting chemistry, are otherwise single, and – coincidence or not – their chokers are really hard to ignore. This sounds good enough to me, especially for a Kirara series. Seika does have other ships that fans support (Bocchi or Kikuri seem to be the other most common) but both of them have other good ships of their own while for PA-san it is basically just Seika, so I just naturally gravitate towards this pairing. But I freely admit there isn’t anything concrete in the series to suggest they’re much more than employeemployee with a good relationship. If they ARE in a relationship then they're doing a good job hiding it considering how even little-sis Nijika doesn't seem to suspect anything. They did have a VERY shippy chapter-art together [75], but the same happened with Bocchi/Ohtsuki [40] (among many others) and it might be best to just treat all of the artworks as the simple references they are.

My mum turned to drugs before I was born. When she had children she stopped taking drugs but slowly turned back to her old habits when my sisters and I were little. My dad was an alcoholic so he didn’t play any part in looking after us. He would drink in the pub as soon as it opened and wouldn’t leave until it closed at night. I would still see him, but it was usually when he would come over to the house that we lived in at the time and fight with my mum. My mum had a boyfriend who was physically and emotionally abusive towards all of us. He was also a drug user, so they would often leave us alone to go out and buy drugs. I have some awful memories of him. We were badly neglected to the point that social services got involved. They tried to help my mum but had no choice but to take us into foster care. We were in foster care for six months until my grandparents won the custody battle, and we got to live with them. During the six months that we lived in care, my mum did not attempt to better herself so that we could go back home to her. Instead, she chose drugs. In 2013, we went to live with my grandparents and have been there ever since. We cut off all contact with my mum, her boyfriend and my dad. They didn’t make any effort to get in touch at all. My dad would send us letters in the post occasionally, but he would also call the home phone when he was drunk and shout abuse at us on the phone. We started a new primary school and everything was going well until I was watching a film at home with both of my sisters. My older sister is eighteen months older than me and my younger sister is two years younger than me but she’s not really involved in the situation. In the film, a couple were trying for a baby so we watched a scene where they were rolling around on a bed kissing each other. We hadn’t seen anything like it before, and we were curious about what they were doing and why they were doing it. We made up a game where we would act out what they were doing in the film. My older sister and I would kiss each other. I can remember her touching me inappropriately once and also getting me to touch her back. The kissing turned into acting out having sex by “humping” each other because we wanted to get “that feeling”. It started off as innocent curiosity, we would choose who was going to play the “boy” and who was going to play the “girl” and would make up different storylines. I was around 8–11 years old when this happened. Most of the time we had our clothes on, but sometimes we didn’t. I didn’t understand sex at all when this was happening. I can remember hitting puberty at a young age and when I got my period I thought I was dying because I didn’t know what it was. I can’t remember any of this happening regularly. I think it just happened occasionally , but I know it happened a handful of times with both my siblings as well. I don’t think I truly understood that this behavior was wrong at the time, because I had lots of raging hormones, and I was just a traumatized child. I recently told my family about what happened and they’ve been so helpful. I’m slowly starting to rebuild a bond with my sister and I’ve realized that I can’t blame her for what happened because it wasn’t her fault. I’ve also struggled with severe OCD and anxiety for as long as I can remember. When I was little, I would have repetitive rituals that I would perform. I would be terrified of leaving my room in case anything bad happened so I went to the toilet at the end of my bed. I thought that bad things would happen to me if I didn’t do things a certain way and spent a lot of my time worrying. I left primary school and started secondary school, but I struggled to keep friends and always found myself feeling left out. I can remember my dad coming to visit on birthdays and Christmas, but when we went into lockdown because of coronavirus, I found out that he had cancer. We went to visit him and say goodbye. When we did this, I saw my mum for the first time in years. On Christmas Eve 2020, a few minutes from midnight she phoned to say that my dad had passed away. I miss him a lot, but he brought my mum back into my life. I slowly started seeing my mum more often and things were going well until she got me drunk one night and took me out to buy drugs with her. I can remember sitting on the sofa with her and her encouraging me to smoke crack cocaine. I was so drunk that I did it. The next day, when I woke up, I knew that she hadn’t changed. I had £2000 savings in my account which she knew about so she would “borrow” the money for gas, electricity and food. I knew it was all for drugs and I didn’t always get the money back. She mostly just smokes weed now, but she slips up sometimes. My mental health is slowly improving but everything that I’ve just written down bothers me a lot. I can’t change the past no matter how much I want to so I just need to move forward and be more positive.

Hi!
I'm looking for a book that my older sister read when she was 9 years old. It was a story about an orphan who's mother died. There were some pharanormal things happening in their house and the girl found the book called "the water-babies" in there (I suppose that it is a book written by Charles Kingsley). The book was really weird and mother of the girl was kind of obssesed with this story. The book has a major plot twist in which the mother turns out to be alive and tries to drown her daughter in the ocean (?) lake (?). Unfortunately my sister does not remember. Please help me find this book! I want to buy it for my sisters birthday.

My mum turned to drugs before I was born. When she had children she stopped taking drugs but slowly turned back to her old habits when my sisters and I were little. My dad was an alcoholic so he didn’t play any part in looking after us. He would drink in the pub as soon as it opened and wouldn’t leave until it closed at night. I would still see him, but it was usually when he would come over to the house that we lived in at the time and fight with my mum. My mum had a boyfriend who was physically and emotionally abusive towards all of us. He was also a drug user, so they would often leave us alone to go out and buy drugs. I have some awful memories of him. We were badly neglected to the point that social services got involved. They tried to help my mum but had no choice but to take us into foster care. We were in foster care for six months until my grandparents won the custody battle, and we got to live with them. During the six months that we lived in care, my mum did not attempt to better herself so that we could go back home to her. Instead, she chose drugs. In 2013, we went to live with my grandparents and have been there ever since. We cut off all contact with my mum, her boyfriend and my dad. They didn’t make any effort to get in touch at all. My dad would send us letters in the post occasionally, but he would also call the home phone when he was drunk and shout abuse at us on the phone. We started a new primary school and everything was going well until I was watching a film at home with both of my sisters. My older sister is eighteen months older than me and my younger sister is two years younger than me but she’s not really involved in the situation. In the film, a couple were trying for a baby so we watched a scene where they were rolling around on a bed kissing each other. We hadn’t seen anything like it before, and we were curious about what they were doing and why they were doing it. We made up a game where we would act out what they were doing in the film. My older sister and I would kiss each other. I can remember her touching me inappropriately once and also getting me to touch her back. The kissing turned into acting out having sex by “humping” each other because we wanted to get “that feeling”. It started off as innocent curiosity, we would choose who was going to play the “boy” and who was going to play the “girl” and would make up different storylines. I was around 8–11 years old when this happened. Most of the time we had our clothes on, but sometimes we didn’t. I didn’t understand sex at all when this was happening. I can remember hitting puberty at a young age and when I got my period I thought I was dying because I didn’t know what it was. I can’t remember any of this happening regularly. I think it just happened occasionally , but I know it happened a handful of times with both my siblings as well. I don’t think I truly understood that this behavior was wrong at the time, because I had lots of raging hormones, and I was just a traumatized child. I recently told my family about what happened and they’ve been so helpful. I’m slowly starting to rebuild a bond with my sister and I’ve realized that I can’t blame her for what happened because it wasn’t her fault. I’ve also struggled with severe OCD and anxiety for as long as I can remember. When I was little, I would have repetitive rituals that I would perform. I would be terrified of leaving my room in case anything bad happened so I went to the toilet at the end of my bed. I thought that bad things would happen to me if I didn’t do things a certain way and spent a lot of my time worrying. I left primary school and started secondary school, but I struggled to keep friends and always found myself feeling left out. I can remember my dad coming to visit on birthdays and Christmas, but when we went into lockdown because of coronavirus, I found out that he had cancer. We went to visit him and say goodbye. When we did this, I saw my mum for the first time in years. On Christmas Eve 2020, a few minutes from midnight she phoned to say that my dad had passed away. I miss him a lot, but he brought my mum back into my life. I slowly started seeing my mum more often and things were going well until she got me drunk one night and took me out to buy drugs with her. I can remember sitting on the sofa with her and her encouraging me to smoke crack cocaine. I was so drunk that I did it. The next day, when I woke up, I knew that she hadn’t changed. I had £2000 savings in my account which she knew about so she would “borrow” the money for gas, electricity and food. I knew it was all for drugs and I didn’t always get the money back. She mostly just smokes weed now, but she slips up sometimes. My mental health is slowly improving but everything that I’ve just written down bothers me a lot. I can’t change the past no matter how much I want to so I just need to move forward and be more positive.

So, very messy and very long situation incoming. I am new to this, never posted before, but I’m going to try and be as all encompassing as possible. I feel there is a lot of context needed to make sure that no one is being misrepresented as I truly want to know if we’re in the wrong.
Essentially, back in April of this year (which feels much further away than it actually is), my wife (26F) and I (29F) got married. I’m American and she’s from another country, we’ve been together for a bit over 3 years and engaged since September 2023. Since we have no way to legally live together at this time, we decided she would come visit me for a few months so we could get a feel for it as much as possible before getting married and officially moving in together.
This was also something we agreed to do to put her parents’ minds at ease. For some more context, when we first started dating, she was not living at home/in her home country. Therefore, this meant when I would visit her, there weren’t any opportunities to meet up with her family (parents and brothers). We attempted offering to do video calls with them or even fly them over for her birthday when we knew I’d be visiting, but they always declined saying they felt calls would be awkward or that they couldn’t take off work to visit (understandable, but we did try to give several months warning and I know they’ve visited my partner there before).
Finally, last year, when my partner was in the process of moving back home, I was able to book a couple weeks off of work and go visit hemeet her family. I was extremely nervous as I’d never met the parents before and I know my own family means a lot to me and I knew then I wanted to marry my then girlfriend, so to me it was basically meeting my in-laws.
Throughout the trip we didn’t talk all that much and they didn’t ask me too many questions, but they seemed perfectly nice and I thought things were going well. Towards the end of the trip, my wife proposed to me and I said yes. This was something we’d been talking about for a while and I was super excited to move forward.
The next day, when she told her folks, they did NOT take it well, even going so far as to say she was confused (about her sexuality). I was not privy to this conversation, so I don’t want to misquote by adding anything else. More context: they knew my wife had purchased a ring and intended to propose. Needless to say, the next few days were ROUGH, but her parents were still pleasant to my face. Her and I ended up going to a different city for the last few days of my trip (which was previously planned) but we were both extremely upset and her guilt-ridden for upsetting her folks.
After that trip, things started to relax a little, bit by bit and we were eventually back to normal. We did all we could (mostly my wife did the leg work as I didn’t want to cross any boundaries) to make her parents feel more comfortable about the plan moving forward, at the time we were considering a fiancée visa since we were, y’know, fiancees lol. She walked them through the timeline and they still weren’t super comfy with it since I’d only met them once (understandable, I think) and we’d not yet lived together. So, we told them we’d have my partner come stay with me for a few months since she wasn’t working and I have an apartment, job, and cats I can’t leave. From what I understand, they liked that idea.
Flash forward to the past few months. She came to stay with me and at the beginning of her 3rd month here we had a consultation with an immigration attorney. In the consultation, the attorney said we’d be better off getting married since nothing was holding us back (like kids, prev. marriages, etc.) as the process is less invasive and we’re working towards marriage anyway. At this point, there were only about 3 or so weeks left in the trip and we had to make a decision as to whether we wanted to wait even longer to start the journey, or get married and start moving forward (this process will take over a year as is).
Ultimately, we decided that we didn’t want to have to keep waiting. We love each other, want to be married, and want to start our lives together. So we did it, we got married! It was a very small ceremony in my brother’s apartment since my step-sister is ordained and we were able to forgo trying to get a date at the courthouse on short notice – meaning we had wifi we could patch people in on Zoom from my wife’s side as well.
Now, here is the issue. Throughout this few week process leading up to the wedding from meeting with the attorney, my partner’s family (parents and brothers) all made it clear they did not approve of the marriage and thought she was “making a mistake”. They also said they wanted to be excited for my partner but just couldn’t be, and asked us to postpone the wedding until later in the year so that they could adjust/come to terms with it/be excited for her. They also made comments about getting married without her family there, which we did feel bad about. We attempted to offer and fly them over (they couldn’t due to work schedules) but we did provide them with the link to the live call. We also made it clear that while we are getting married, we still want to have a larger “wedding” later so that we can celebrate with all our family and friends together (which we intend to have in my partner’s home country). At the wedding, all of her friends signed onto the Zoom and only one of her brothers showed up, not her parents or other brother.
There were several moments leading up to the wedding where we nearly didn’t go through with it because she was so torn up at the fact her family was so upset she was getting married. Trying to help take something off her plate with making a decision, I called it and said maybe we shouldn’t right now. We’ve made it long distance for so long and I would do absolutely anything for her, including wait another 2-3 years before we can realistically be married and live life together. I just didn’t want her to hurt. But ultimately, saying we wouldn’t only made things harder and we kept coming back to it being what we want to do.
Aside from her family, everyone else was super supportive (my family & friends, all of her life long friends). We are happy to be moving forward, no question. Neither of us regret doing it and I’m so happy to finally be married to the love of my life, even as she needs to be on the other side of the world. But as she’s had to return home in the meantime while visas are in process, things have been rough. Her folks haven’t brought up the marriage and when talking to her one brother tonight, he told her everyone has been super upset and not coping well. He explained that her mom was hurt about not being included in the wedding and severely depressed. He also explained her other brother has just been angry. This eventually led to a long conversation with her family. Apparently her parents wanted to join and had intended to but didn't know the exact time or that when the link was sent it was go time. The ceremony literally lasted for two minutes and she said goodbye to everyone on the stream pretty quick because the time difference meant it was late for them. Her brother made it clear that he thought she should have done more like call them or wait until they joined. She was really hurt and the stress was taking a toll in the lead up to the day. She thought they had the information and hadn't wanted to be there. Things remain tense, this literally just happened, but they have said they love her unconditionally and want to move forward but just don't know how.
My wife feels like we could have done more to prevent these feelings being hurt and is dealing with so much guilt. I feel like we did what was right for us and we continuously reassured them that I would still be visiting while we wait for visas to process and that it means a lot to me that we have a good relationship and that they get to know me and my family. I even reached out to her mother via text apologizing about how things were happening, but assuring them that I still want to know them. They didn’t respond. I don’t know, I feel like we just did what was right for us as a couple. Long distance is hard, we want to be together, we love each other and want to be married, and we’re still going to have another larger wedding in the future. But at the same time, I don’t want people to feel excluded or deeply depressed due to our marriage, especially my wife’s family.
Are we the assholes for going through with the marriage right now instead of postponing like they asked?

I (17f), my mother (37f), her (bf 50m), and my sister's ages 3, 4, and 14 live together. My sister (14) goes to her father's every week. I usually clean up after her. I beg her to clean before she leaves she usually says " I'll get it up don't worry". She never does and it falls to me. I clean up after my dog since he isn't house trained and the puppies that our other dog had. We have GSD and if you know anything about them they shed like crazy. I vacuum the entire house, but I have to clean my younger sister's toys up before I start. They usually just leave them around because they expect it to just teleport back to their toy box. My mother's grown bf who I've never liked sweeps dirt into a pile in the middle of the floor and leaves it, doesn't tie up trash bags, refuses to do dishes, his only real chore is laundry yet they have piles of dirty clothes and 7 baskets full of clean clothes in their room. My mother pays the bills and claims " she doesn't have to do anything" Honestly if you own a house don't you want it to be clean? I don't mind cleaning up after myself and my sisters but when it comes to cleaning up behind everyone in the house it's exhausting. My grandmother buys my food, clothes, and recently towels. Yesterday I was going to take a shower in noticed some of my shampoo and conditioner was gone ( also bought by my grandmother)I have 6 towels and they just disappeared. This is where I know I'm the asshole I kicked a hole through the wall where the pile of dirty clothes stays. I was extremely frustrated and I just snapped. Today, I asked if I could have help and how I can't clean the whole house by myself. I basically said can you just clean up after yourselves. Her bf starts screaming at me about how I live here rent free and to stfu because I do nothing. My mother stated " I pay bills I don't have to do anything" and started criticizing me on my room I told her I don't have time to clean my room and the whole house which was a reason why I asked for help. This basically turned into them yelling at me to stop acting like this or pay rent when I turn 18. Im moving into college in August and my high school graduation and birthday is next week. I was screaming I can't do it all by myself I need help. I told my mother I can't pay rent and I should just move into my sisters fathers house. She just said fuck you over and over . So I just need to know AITAH for asking my family to help clean?

Chapter 4
Location: Glimmer Fate
POV: Faror Hend
No rain on the plains in Glimmer Fate. High black grasses make the area extremely hot. Faror Hend is patrolling the edge of the Vitr Sea with her cousin Spinnock Durav. The shore of the Vitr Sea is devoid of life and the breeze coming off of it stings the lungs. The liquid of the sea dissolves almost anything it comes into contact with including stones. Spinnock is sharpening his Hust blade on a stone that has been worn away by the sea. His blade is very old and therefore does not sing. It's new to him, but has been passed down for generations. A third rider in their party, Finarra Stone, was scouting the shoreline out of sight. Nothing lived this close, so it was safe to go alone. Today the Vitr is calm, but recently it has not been and storms had resulted in its claiming more land for the sea. The sea is expanding. Eventually it will come to the border of Kurald Galain if they cannot find a solution. The Tiste have no idea what the source of the Vitr is and how to stop it's expansion. Tiste scholars are also unwilling to consult with anyone outside the Tiste.
Faror Hend is extremely attracted to Spinnock Durav, but their houses are too close in relations for her to act on this attraction. Plus she is betrothed and older, although these would not be a barrier to her. Faror thinks of a line from a Gallan poem, "The ground is bare and hard / and will hold all secrets / and the sky cares not / for the games of those beneath it." She desperately wants to act on her lust, but so far has kept in control. Faror is a big Gallan fan. Spinnock seems to know how his cousin feels and teases her.
POV: Captain Finarra Stone
During her patrol of the Vitr coastline, Finarra finds a carcass. This is puzzling as she has never seen one this close to the sea. It appears to have come out of the sea itself. The corpse is huge with scales and a tail. But a lot of the body eaten away by the Vitr. The head and neck were missing and the top of the torso appears chewed. Very few Tiste had ever claimed to have seen a dragon, but this could be one. However, those legends all had them with wings and Faror did not see any evidence of wings on this beast. A breeze brought the stench to the horse and this caused it to back up a few steps making noise. At this the stump where the neck should be lifted. The creature begins shuffling towards her. With an unbelievably fast lurch it closes the distance and swipes at Faror and her horse with two arms catching the horse with both swipes. Faror finds herself tumbling through the air. She lands on her shoulder and breaks something. The beast is still again after decimating her horse. She decides to head for flatter ground to make better time back to her party. She is the daughter of Hust Henarald and possesses his sword. Her biggest threat now were the naked wolves that roamed Glimmer Fate. Faror contemplates the meaning of dark and light and the impossibility of either without the other. She also says that Mother Dark had been a mortal Tiste woman before embracing darkness. While Finarra is contemplating, something screams at her intending to freeze her with fear. Finarra mortally wounds it as it streaks by.
POV: Faror Hend
Hearing the screams of the wolves and no sound of their prey, Faror fears Finarra is the prey. She has not returned and it has been too long. Faror decides to leave Spinnock at camp and go to investigate. He tells her to be careful and he doesn't want to lose her. She responds by saying that he has many cousins. Faror can hear at least a dozen wolves and knows that it is likely that Finarra is fighting by herself without her horse. Thinking of Spinnock's face, she attempts to replace it in her mind with her betrothed, Kagamandra Tulas. A Tiste who the war had made gaunt. Tulas was of a low house and was under the command of Vatha Urusander. This alone would not have made house Durav attempt a betrothal. However, in the war he had saved the life of Silchas Ruin and by doing so had earned the favor of Mother Dark who would reward him by making him the head of a new High House. She thinks that the war stole Tulas's ability to love anything and she is not sure she can love him either, but she will try.
Eventually she finds the place of the wolf attack. There are many dead wolves. The fighting is over, but she does not see Finarra. She thinks further down the trail she will find wolves eating her corpse. Finarra comes out from behind some boulders. Faror begins to speak, but Finarra tells her to speak softly as something has walked out of the Vitr. Finarra chastises Faror for beginning to follow the path through the grasses that would have led to her death. Faror discovers that she had almost welcomed it. Finarra was tracking whatever had walked out of the Vitr when she came upon Faror. "Small footprints, puddles of Vitr pooled in them" She tells Faror that it is their duty to track it.
POV: Finarra Stone
Finarra in a lot of pain from her shoulder and wolf bites, contemplates the look she caught in Faror's eyes. One that told her she was seeking death. She thinks the cause may be Faror's betrothal to a broken man that may be incapable of love and being in close proximity to Spinnock who oozes it. "Spinnock Durav had been pursued by women and men since he had first come of age. He had learned to not give up too much of himself, since those hands reaching for him desired little more than conquest and possession." Finarra has also caught Spinnock's adoration of his cousin turning in to something else. She knows this kind of torture between them will ruin them. She contemplates how to fix the situation. Transferring one might work, but also thinks of another more sure answer.
POV: Faror Hend
Faror and Finarra are both on the back of Faror's horse. Finarra is unconscious and Faror is having a difficult time keeping her on the horse. She thinks about Finarra only being a few years older than her, but already being a battle veteran. She realizes that the wolves she found were not the ones killed by Finarra, but those of the someone that came from the sea. Faror makes it back to the camp. They treat the unconscious woman's wounds fearing infection.
POV: Spinnock Durav
They had burned away the dead flesh and infection on Finarra's leg hoping they got it all. Finarra has not woken up and is fevered. Spinnock outlines their options whether to stay until Finarra wakes up or to try to transport her as is. Faror informs him that Finarra wanted them to track the stranger from the Vitr. Faror tells Spinnock that Finarra needs a healer and soon, but they also need to track the stranger. Faror will go after the stranger and Spinnock will take Finarra to the outpost. Spinnock follows orders, but now there is a coldness between the cousins.
Following the trail she had discovered the previous night, Faror Hend found several more wolf corpses all killed with savage blows. The path she now followed, if kept straight, would lead directly to Kharkanas. Eventually she comes to a clearing and finds a fair-skinned, blonde woman clothed only in a scaled wolf hide over her shoulders. Everywhere else was sunburnt. She appears young and has no weapon, which is curious considering her roughly cut hair and several wolf corpses. Faror says she means no harm and asks if she is an Azathanai. To this the woman responds, "I know your language. But it is not mine. Azathanai. I know that word. Azat drevlid naratarh Azathanai. The people who were never born." After a few questions that the woman cannot answer, she tells Faror that she recalls nothing not even the sea she came out of or her own name. Faror tells the woman that she will escort her to Kharkanas to meet with Mother Dark and gives the woman a Tiste name until she can recall her own. The name is T'riss. Upon hearing this the woman smiles and says, "I am “born of the sea”. Faror asks if she will walk or ride with her. T'riss says that Faror's horse looks useful and she will have one too. She turns to the grasses and conjures a horse out of them. It seems that it's weight is too much for the grasses used. Looking at Faror, T'riss then conjures clothes, lance, and a sword out of the same grasses. This scares Faror because it is god-like sorcery. "‘Mother Dark.’ T’riss smiled. ‘That is a nice title.’"
Location: 3 days out from Neret Sorr
POV: Sharenas Ankhadu
Sharenas likes the heat. She tans nice unlike most of her cohort. She hates the cold and remembers her time in the campaign against the Jheleck unfondly. She is the commander of her cohort. Her sister and cousin, Infayen Menand and Tathe Lorat, are greatly renowned in the legion and being related to them saw high expectations settled onto Sharenas's shoulders. Her relatives are not currently with the legion. Hunn Raal and Osserc are in the vanguard and Ilgast Rend was not happy to be with them. He questions whether or not Urusander knows what Hunn Raal is doing. Osserc backs up Raal and so Ilgast drops the inquiry. Sharenas thinks Osserc is lying when he says his father knows of and approves this expedition. Sharenas thinks, "Hunn Raal is honourable. He knows what he is doing, and he knows, as do we all, that what he is doing is the right thing to do" She thinks Osserc is impulsive and has a thin skin, but Hunn Raal keeps him from making brash decisions. 3 cousins of Hunn Raal also accompanied them. Serap, Risp, and Sevegg all sleep with Hunn Raal, but their second cousins so it's not illegal. The last of their party is Kagamandra Tulas. He is forbidding and dangerous and hadn't spoken since their departure. They are heading towards the Warden outpost where Tulas's betrothed is stationed. Sharenas asserts that every woman could see that Tulas is dead inside and left his soul in the war. That he longs for death. She contemplates that once Urusander remakes the Tiste into a meritocracy, that arranged marriages will no longer be. Ironically because Tulas had given so much in defense of the Tiste he would be a prize as a husband. She pities Faror Hend and her future with this man. However she considers that Faror, just days after the betrothal, signed up with the wardens to get herself as far away as possible. Sharenas is very interested in witnessing the meeting between Tulas and Faror. She resolves to help Faror out of her predicament although it is only for her own amusement.
POV: Ilgast Rend
Ilgast does not like Hunn Raal or Osserc, thinking the former vain and arrogant and the latter nothing like his father except in appearance. Ilgast does not approve of all the debauchery that his fighting had bought for the Tiste. He thinks that Urusander has lost the plot himself. It wouldn't be long before the legion rebelled under his indifference. He would love it if Draconus was put in his place, but fears this would result in great bloodshed and does not want that. He also knows that if Hunn Raal is allowed to lead the legion in Urusander's absence, civil war was assured. "In a world of blood, everyone drowns". Ilgast is disappointed in Sharenas, thinking she would be wise enough not to fall into the wake of Hunn Raal. He feels he is in the middle of this brewing conflict being of a major house and also a cohort commander in Urusander's legion. Hunn Raal thinks he will help him convince the wardens to join his cause. However, he knows Calat Hustain will not join Hunn Raal. He is far too loyal to his own house. Ilgast remembers when Mother Dark was just a Tiste woman until she found the Gate. "Darkness was many things; most of all, it was selfish"

Well. It was my 30th birthday today. I never thought I’d ever make it tbh. Still wondering what the heck I’m doing here.
I came out properly to my family in my own way, in my own terms, as a mark of pride and confidence. My parents and sister said absolutely nothing. No texts back, no calls, nothing. Fair enough I guess. Other family members took it upon themselves to search my name and find my socials and some things about me. My privacy wasn’t respected whatsoever.
Unbeknownst to me all that was taking place while I took myself on a walk around the boating lake in the sun to grab a coffee and a pastry or cake as a treat.
On the way back I was shouted at by some random bloke and had something thrown at me. I reported him as I thought he may be drunk and could be a danger to himself and others but was mocked for doing so.
I got back, took a nap to shake off the encounter, and then woke up to all hell breaking loose on my phone from family who snooped and snitched on me.
I haven’t cried in a long time but today I locked myself in the bathroom and sobbed.
On a good note, I was at least gendered correctly both by the rando and the person/s I spoke to about the incident… Apparently it was deserved for playing pokémon go as a “fully grown male adult.”
Happy birthday to me.
edit: words.