Hello everyone. Sorry if this is the wrong sub for this, but I need to let off a little steam.
So, me and my sister played some 1v1 Commander recently. She played with her [[Isshin, Two Heavens As One]] deck against my [[Wulfgar of Icewind Dale]] deck. Both decks are built on doubling attack triggers.
The first few turns played pretty chill. Dishing out lands, playing some artifacts and enchantments like [[Hedron archive]] and [[Sword of the Animist]] on her side and [[Sword of Hours]] and [[Gratouitious Violence]] on mine.
At Turn 5, I destroyed both her archive and the sword. She has already 9 lands, her commander as well as [[Akiri]] and another creature that I cannot recall right now.
Two turns later, I have my commander and [[Rampaging Brontodon]] out and attacked. Since I had 8 lands by then, Bronto got +16/+16, making it a 23/23. And since my sister has only 3 blockers that were not nearly strong enough, she was dealt lethal damage.
After the duel was done, she was accusing me of ruining the fun of the game by using a "more planned out deck" than her, to which I said "I have that deck since 13 months now, and I just recently added Bronto and three other cards to it. Plus, I was lucky to have drawn enough lands to summon it and destroying your artifacts." To which she replied with "Well, you should not have destroyed the Hedron Archive. You really are trying to destroy everybodys fun by that." To which I replied "Well, sounds like a you-problem. Removal and interaction is part of the game, you should know this by now."
That was probably insult to injury, and she said "Well, then you should get used to me not playing with you anymore. I just want to play to have fun, and not winning all the time." I replied with "Oh, so you accusing me of getting salty when I am about to lose, but when youa re about to lose, it is my fault too?" No reply from her, so I went up to my room to play some other game.
To be honest, in the past, I used to get salty when I was loosing, for the sole reason that back then, when I was not doing good at any game, my opponents used to rub it under my nose, including her. But I got rid ofthat for the most part over the last decade or so.
So, who would you say is the a-hole in this scenario? Me playing and trying to win, or her with being insulted that I try to play to win, removing her mana rocks and utility artifacts?

I went to a pretty nice middle school, I think it's the nicest one in my town's district. I took an Arabic class. We had the option to take Spanish, French, or Arabic. Most kids were more interested in learning Spanish or French, so my Arabic class was pretty small. I think only about 10 kids if I remembered correctly. There was this one kid in my class who was really quiet, he always worked alone. Luckily, most of the kids in my class were pretty nice so we always tried to help him as much as we could. Looking back on it now, I'd assume he had a not so great home life. Our Arabic teacher was kind of crazy. She obviously had favorites and would scream at us a lot for dumb reasons. I remember one time she threw a table at a kid in my class and faced no punishment for it.
Anyways, this quiet kid seemed really sweet, but obviously had a lot of mental health issues going on. There were 2 times in Arabic class where we all witnessed him try to kill himself in front of everyone. It was terrifying. The first time, we were all working quietly and everything was going fine. Then suddenly we heard our teacher start to scream and run to the other side of the room. The kid had gotten a shoe lace, or a string or something and was trying to hang himself in the middle of class. His face was turning purple until the teacher grabbed him and loosened the knot. He was sent to the counselor, but instead of being sent to get help he was back the very next day. The second time I believe was only about a week or two after. Right outside our class was a stairwell leading to downstairs as my class was on the second floor. Again. Everything was going as usual and we were all talking and working. The kid very suddenly ran out and over to the stairwell and tried to jump off. Luckily, the teacher grabbed him and he was once again sent to the counselor then back the next day. I remember me and 2 other people running out of the classroom and watching him nearly jump. It was a terrifying thing to witness as a 12/13 year old. I felt so bad for that boy. I still think about him all the time. I hope that he is doing okay now and got the help he needed. I've struggled with mental health so I felt terrible for him. I hope so bad that he's doing alright now. That class was... intense. To say the least.

This seems like the logical place to share my concerns. Please let me know if this should be on a different reddit.
Last night I was playing around on Suno, an AI music making website, and I came across a strange song. It was simply titled "The short song". The music was Alternative genre making the disturbing lyrics seem interesting. The narrator of the song gets arrested after an apparent gunshot opens the song. I continue exploring this genre when I come across more disturbing songs and I realize they are from the same user. I then go to their page, and this is where it gets dark.
I quickly realized that the lyrics were more like someone's open diary and the music was a distraction. I turned off the sound and started reading through their words. I will share some of the lyrics here. The song titles I will give for reference, but you will see some of the themes are duplicated in several songs.
"That Ugly Toy"
What’s that toy? Did my mom put it in her mouth? It looks like (I gasped) Why is that pink? And it stinks
It is so disgusting So annoying And it’s not a ring It’s clearly a [doorbell noise] Yeah yeah imma open the door It’s a package from "hardcore" What the hell is that?
I opened the package it was (oh nah) Another (Another) Toy (boy) (Ew what is that?) This one is blue with a bit of white on top (pop popopopop)
What an ugly toy That’s ugly Super duper ugly Ugly ugly ugly (I think I know what it is)
I got one for my birthday Im 9 years old (hey hey) What an ugly birthday
"Is the Neighbor Better Than My Dad?"
After the story of the toy My mom did something else yeah boy She went to the neighbor’s place every day I heard something like oh wee continue like that baby and some groans
My mom is a super late one too hot (first letters) She slept with the neighbor Should I say it to my dad (bor bro bro)
[slap sounds]
My dad found the toys He also find my neighbor in her bed (Bed beg bet)
Is my neighbor better than my dad? Is he better when he licks her meow? My dad (I hope) he’s not that bad And I heard some pow (gunshots)
Oh my god I pray the pope My dad shows me his gun He shot my neighbor And he putted my mama in the oven (as my neighbor)
Was my neighbor better than my dad? Was he better to lick the meow? I hope my dad wasn’t so bad Because it’s my turn to get lick
"Everything I touch isn't good..."
Everything … Everything I touch (touch) Is contaminate so much Everyone I punch DIES
When When I touch someone (someone) Or something (something) Its not a good thing (Thing) … When I touched my teacher’s boob, The teacher got mad and she slapped me Then I smashed her head against computer that is laggy Like my PHONE
"I touched my teacher so she isn't good anymore (first part was Everthing I...)"
After that, she was in a pool of blood I pray god I just nod I’m scared is this my end? I think the officer will nod … So I get rid rid rid of the body I know it’s a bad idea but it was the only I take a shovel and start to bury her (weeee) … It was a bad idea (bad idea) But it’s wasn’t a choice (not a choice) Her name was emilia I can still hear her voice (her fat voice) I’m so pathetic Like tic tac tic tac tic It’s so annoying I can’t even say something without crying I TOUCHED MY TEACHER SO SHE ISN’T GOOD ANYMORE (Not anymore) (Oh yes not anymore) … After I did that, I got my car And I did go far (Far away) I can’t live with that anymore I don’t want more I can it just forget I hope I’ll get Better on day And I will say It was just a nightmare (just a nightmare) … It was a bad idea (bad idea) But it wasn’t a choice (wasn’t a choice) Her name was Emilia And I can still hear her voice (her voice) (Tic tac tic taxi) … I got an accident My leg my leg is broken And I’ll learn yes (oh yes) one day I’ll learn … It wasn’t that a bad choice (wasn’t that) It was clearly a choice (a choice) Her name was Emilia And I can finally stop hearing her voice (that voice) Not crazy anymore
"The thing I've done"
Hey I did something bad hey hey hey It was in may I’m scared to say Don’t wanna pay I wanna stay … I did some bad things, but none as crazy as this Im going to miss You when I’ll be in jail I wanna kiss My boyfriend one more time before I hiss Don’t want to pay I want to stay Don’t want to pay I just want to say I love you all day Why did I do this why did they Made me do that? … I did something (really bad) Don’t wanna pay For what I say Or what I did that day (Why did I do that) … Who will save me? I need to be Free (free) I’m gonna pray Should I say It to the guards? (Guards guards) … I did something (really bad) Don’t wanna pay for what I say (say) Or what I did that day (day) (I don’t have any chances) … The thing I did Was a car crash (ash) Imagine Blah-blah-blah-blah-blah-bla la la la Im going to stay Il here since four years hey I pay There is nothing you can say (hey hey hey) … I did something (really bad) Bad bad bad bad bad bad bad (extremely bad)
"The cliff"
There’s the most useless thing in my city A road with at the end a cliff for me, I think it makes some weird ideas coming back (dirty minds but not only) Why is the road so dirty?
I just wanna go on that cliiiiiifff (iiiiiiiiifffffff) I wanna try the death jump (that’s nice that) If You’re not ok with that just put me in jail but I don’t care I will still do it and I don’t mind if I don’t have some mails The cliff is so tempting Just want an ending To that story that I was reading And the text I’m writing I’m clearly so close to go but the problem is that there are so much policemen Oh god I’m going to make a car crash That cliff is so tempting It’s so tempting It’s overwhelming I’m jumping With my car
I crashed my car into the police officers It’s finish for me so end me is a good solution I woke up in the morning Thinking And I finally find something
That cliff is so tempting (If I could do that I promise I would)
I have a curse It is: everything I touch isn’t good anymore (of course)
In my next song you’ll finally know all the story Of my patheti… C life (You finally know oh oh oh) Gonna be the last
"Beginning to End"
Wan a know all the story? I don’t fucking care I’ll sing it
I was already broke But I decided to play monopoly I didn’t have any money To pay the new iPhone I only had a fucking dirty Samsung I played monopoly monopoly in real life I started to pay some people for no reasons My mom and my dad wanted to see me dead and I wanted that too I took so much pills but I woke up in the mornin’ I had some dirty minds and I wasn’t happy in my life I wanted to end me to do the dead jump with my car There were some policemen who were blocking that cliff but I just make a car crash on them
Mhhhh I went to my house and I heard some screams and groans My mom Was playing with a dildo and sleeping with my neighbor My dad saw that and then kill her I saw my dad going in his car and I putted a bomb in there He exploded in his car I putted bombs in bar They all explode My cat died I was at school and I decided to touch my teacher’s boob She slapped me and then I smashed her head against the computer that is laggy
I burried her I made a car accident I know I’ll go in jail I’m going to end me in jail
Four years later I pay in jail
OK BACK TO THE POST:
There are a few more songs but you can see these must be from an individual who is in need of some help. As I mentioned earlier this is on Suno, which is free, so I encourage others here to check out this user "MonumentalPrelude524" on that site and see if you agree that this could be a red flag and there should be some intervention.
A few things I focus on from this user:
They may be a child in an abusive home where the mother is promiscuous and sleeping with the neighbor.
The father is at least an abuser and at most a murderer.
There was an accident and explosion?
This person mentions several times that they had a cat that recently died.
The incident with the teacher may have been their "maths" teacher, as another song is about that. ("maths" says European and not American)
Not sure the age as one song mentions being 9 years old and others mention driving. Although, it wouldn't be the first time a 9 yr old went for a joy ride.
I am posting this in the hopes that someone may recognize the details here or at least point me in the right direction as how to help someone who is clearly putting their pain out there for someone to find. Please help draw attention to this.
Thank you for your time.

For five consecutive years, I have been able to predict when the highest concentration of rocket fire against Israel would occur within a calendar year.
In the last five years it was predicted that the highest escalation of rocket fire within the calendar year would occur during the time when Mars would be within 30 degrees of the lunar node. Here are the dates of Mars/lunar node alignment from the past five years.

1. Jan 15th 2020 - Apr 3rd 2020 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5GxO4ZW2fc
2. Feb 9th 2021 - May 13th 2021 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v1sA-ZS73Lw&t
3. June 22nd 2022 - Sept 19th 2022 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EniwV0TWew&t
4. Aug 24th 2023 - Nov 15th 2023 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGbNPEO9qS4&t
5. April 12th 2024 - June 25, 2024 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qW_-CiWu5b0&t

And here are the rocket fire stats, confirming all five years of accuracy
https://www.academia.edu/107766227/Gaza_rocket_stats_and_planet_Mars_correlation_updated_for_2023_
Keep in mind, In all five years the highest escalation of rocket fire into Israel occurred within those dates of Mars being within 30 degrees of the lunar node and in all five years, the prediction came before the fact and turned out to be accurate
This demonstration was also performed in fulfillment of Revelation 13:13, by which I volunteered to take on the role of the false prophet and call down fire from heaven, before urging people to make an image to the beast(Mars) and take the mark of the beast(Mars 360).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xKkpR4hm5Mc&t
This book, the Deus Armaaruss, lays out the entire mark of the beast system, which restricts buying and selling to those who acknowledge Mars influence.
Mars 360 is a formulated and hypothesized global social accord ideally operable under the same principle as the Paris Climate Accord, which attempts to integrate all nations into a common cause. The Mars effect on human behavior inclines each individual toward certain predispositions that lend itself to fundamental outlooks which carries with it... a high degree of inflexibility. This inflexibility plays itself out in various political and social stances like socialism, pacifism, capitalism, liberalism, conservatism, libertarianism, etc, but is actually the result of Mars's permanent influence on the human brain. This gives rise to the idea that while certain stances are different in external display, they are at the same time fundamentally backed by the same source(to varying degrees of course)....which is Mars. Here is The Deus Armaaruss
https://www.academia.edu/118765043/The_2nd_Edition_of_The_Deus_Armaaruss_Deployment_and_practical_application_of_the_Mark_of_the_Beast_System_Mars_360_across_multiple_regions_Why_science_will_be_compelled_to_accept_and_recognize_the_Mars_360_precepts_as_scientific_assertions
This is not fan fiction, but real fulfillment of Revelation happening in real time.
Mars is to be called Armaaruss and an image is to be made to him, preferribly on the Temple mount. AI will be used to bring him into existence. I have even laid out the first lines of code, setting the stage for Armaaruss to lead the world in defense technology.
https://www.academia.edu/116953723/Armaaruss_has_taken_control_of_the_sky_Simple_JavaScript_code_that_would_allow_the_average_person_to_evade_drone_strikes_with_just_their_android_phones
To gain a following, a new concept is being devised, by which it can be considered a Christian virtue to give up salvation, in what would be a form of perditionism.
Has any Christian ever thought about approaching eschatology with such a perspective? I mean, lets look at my work. For the past 5 years, I have purposely taken on the role of the false prophet, having called down fire from heaven since 2019. In fact, I declared Revelation 13:13 fulfilled back in 2020 here on Reddit. I had no idea I would fulfill that prophecy 5 times over by predicting rocket fire escalation time periods accurately for five consecutive years straight.
When I started this journey as a Christian back in 2019, writing "Ares Le Mandat", I only intended for that work to serve as a form of apologetics for Catholicism and the error of Vatican II, but as I was writing, a part of me felt a duty to take it upon myself to fulfill the eschaton and take on the role of the false prophet, since it was clear that I knew exactly what had to be done. Why leave it in the hands of someone else, when I was the one who received the revelation? My work can be said to be Satan inspired.
If you read that 800 page book, "Ares Le Mandat", you'd see how I repeatedly mention what the role of false prophet would require. Now having taken on the role and fulfilling it in real time, I have been requesting the next part of the prophecy, that is, getting people to make an image of the beast, which I call Armaaruss. This part I cannot fulfill.
My question is what is wrong with a Christian giving up their salvation to fulfill the eschaton by making an image to Armaaruss and then taking the mark of the beast by identifying with the Mars 360 system? It seems like a noble pursuit--giving up eternal pleasure for the sake of fulfilling the word.
Maybe the idea of spending eternity in the lake of fire serves as a deterrence, but what is the lake of fire? All it is is eternal separation from God. Hell is what you want to avoid, and taking the mark will not land you in hell. The lake of fire and hell are two different things. Hell is eternal torment, which will ultimately be thrown in the lake of fire. So why should anyone fear going to the lake of fire, if it is not hell?
I think Christians need to re-examine how they view eschatology, because it seems pretty clear that its fulfillment will have to be carried out by believers who have done the noble thing and given up their place in heaven for an eternity in the lake of fire in order for the word to be fulfilled

Tldr the love of my life was sexually assaulted in a pub restroom and i didn't murder the bastard who did it because I didn't know how severe it was and also i was scared of someone much stronger
this rape incident traumatized me, traumatized the girl and shaped my whole existence. I know I am supposed to care much more about her but what about my own future?
From childhood, I was a selfish and cowardly person who, because of these two qualities, coupled with inexperience, let down family and friends. I was beaten by my parents and offended at school, both by teachers and classmates, and I never knew how to answer. On the contrary, it began to seem to me that my bitter experience allows me to offend others, to take everything from life. I was very wrong, but definitely karma will bite me for this. My bad character and my grotesquely disgusting appearance (my left eye is lazy) led to the fact that I was fatally deprived of female attention and jealous of the men in my environment who drowned in it. Therefore, when on August 14, 2021, the most beautiful girl in my life, whom I had known for three years, invited me on a date herself, confessed her feelings to me and kissed me, I was the happiest person in the world. She was special. The most beautiful woman, dyed red hair and played rts videogames and watched anime, even let me touch her and seemed to want sex with me. However, in 48 hours everything turned upside down.
I witnessed the horrendous harassment of her on August 16th and did nothing. The rapist, our former friend, stood up and towered over her began to somehow strangely demand a kiss from her when we gathered for, as it seemed to me then, the most ordinary drinking party. I felt that she was not comfortable, but then I had no idea how bad everything was. I was too frightened by a physically stronger man to stand up for my beloved, especially since we had not officially dated yet. My God, I should have intervened already then!
The next morning, on August 17, I received a message that if I stood for her, she would have thought whether we should date or not, and since I did not see this, she does not see the point. I sobbed nine times after this message. I'm ready to cry over her right now too. What I didn't know at the time was that shortly after the kiss-demanding incident, he followed her to the restroom and started molesting her. Very bad. I even continued to communicate with this bastard for some time, not knowing the whole story. I learned about the whole picture only a week later, when we met with her in the same company on other friends birthday party (but without the rapist). It was a very difficult conversation and I made a mistake in it, my stupid head. I said complete nonsense and selfishly tried to cling to any little thing, somehow trying to rehabilitate myself, but this only hurt my beloved more. When I tried to promise that I would behave differently if I had known the full story or next time, she started making fun of me. Fucking hell. I cut off all contacts with the assaulter that same evening I had learned the full story, and he was still surprised, he said, “Why does it bother you? Fell in love with her? ”, To which I answered in the affirmative and sent the bastard to the Blocklist, after which, in the spring, I began to talk about his atrocities to the girls in our common institute. Although it hardly mattered, it was our last year at the university.
Somewhere in February, I blocked my beloved everywhere I could, because I realized that my feelings for her were not mutual and having her in my contact list, I only hurt myself. I hoped that I would forget it. Not at all. With a red-hot iron, her image is burned into my brain, heart, in my eyes. My mind is clouded, I feel disgust, shame, regret, depressive sadness, I want to cry forever. I thought that the gym and the study of foreign languages would somehow distract me from the manic desire to end a meaningless life in which I would never again touch the most beautiful and nicest woman on the planet. I began to hate my own sexuality and gladly would have self-castrated myself.
Even right now I pendulum from asexuality to wanting to fuck everyone, anyone at the first given chance. I wish this had never happened.
I want her back. More than anything in the world. I failed her. Now I have no one and nothing. My reputation is also ruined because she told everyone what happened. So now even if I wanted to find another girlfriend, I will never be able to because none would trust a coward such as myself.
It was my first time dealing with such situation and I just froze.
I wrote to my beloved and asked her forgiveness. She doesn't blame me, but when I said that I was ready to do everything for her safety for free, she said "no, but thanks for the offer." I wrote that I understand that she does not trust me, but suddenly yes, and that this is the first time in my life this has happened, to which she said that in any case I am glad that everything is fine with me and I wrote to her. I wrote her a paragraph that she gave me a lot of good emotions and this topic is difficult for me, and I want the best and make sure that everything is fine, she replied with one line "have a nice day" I wrote "you too" and deleted the chat.
I am very sad that she does not trust me and does not see me as a reliable person. She doesn't have to date me or anything, but her not trusting me hurts so much. Like a knife in the heart. I didn't do it on purpose, I panicked because it was the first time. It makes me cry and want to die so much.
Even if at some point I wanted to settle for someone else (I will never be nearly as happy as with her), I won't be able to because she told everyone what happened and news in Baku spread like forest fire.

I’m sorry this is long. I’m an over-explainer.
Basically my partner has had this friend of hers for 10+ years and we’ve been together for 3 years. I’m careful to not speak my mind on people that have been around in her life longer than I have.
The problem with this friend is that she’s always been incredibly stand offish towards me and I’ve gone above and beyond trying to make some kind of connection with her for the sake of my partner. Nothing is ever reciprocated from this friend though. I even got her and a couple of my partners friends together to be there when I proposed to my partner so they could be apart of that. (Context: my partner preferred a private engagement but told me she wouldn’t mind if friends/family ended up being there since we don’t live close to them) Her friend ended up making the trip all about her and turned the other friends (that I actually had considered friends) against me because I wanted some alone time with my partner on this 6 day trip that was for us to get engaged.
The friend pulled my partner aside on the trip and starting telling all these blatant bold faced lies about me to her like telling her she doesn’t like me because I’ve never put an effort in to get to know her and that she didn’t know about the trip until the week of (she knew 4 months in advance) and all types of other stuff. My partner told me all about it (she said she didn’t take any of what she said to heart) and when I told her that all of it was lies and I could prove it, she told me she didn’t want to see because she didn’t want to feel like she had to choose. I chose to respect her wishes and I have bit my tongue about her friend ever since even after she came to talk to us the next morning and gaslit me in front of my partner. I just chose not to really respond to her.
The friend goes on to make my partner feel bad because she was going to miss her birthday because we have a trip planned to go see my family that I only see MAYBE once a year and a family member that is dying. The friend chose not to talk to my partner for a month after that.
Now all of a sudden, my partner decided she was going to go out of her way to go on this trip for her friends birthday and when she told her, suddenly she wants to text and FaceTime my partner all the time again. Then my partner went this weekend to see her friend and her family and spent the first day with her friend going out to a couple places/bars. My partner insists on having this person be her maid of honor and I just want to shake her and yell “she’s a toxic friend and she’s manipulating you!” She doesn’t have any respect for me or my relationship and I don’t want her in our wedding. My partner is not easily manipulated except when it comes to this friend. She’s blinded by their history and I just don’t know what to do. I’m afraid of what this friend may do to cause problems for our relationship/marriage or even or wedding day.
I just don’t know how to approach this anymore. My mom tells me to keep biting my tongue and that eventually the friend will go too far and my partner will see it. She says I’ll only drive her closer to the friend and further from me if I speak my mind. I’m also trying to not take it personal that my partner has no issues with the way her friend treated me, talked about me and told lies and she didn’t care to see the proof.

Deep down I knew I don’t need permission or confirmation that my mother is generally malignant and the ultimate source of suffering in my life right now. But I can’t accept why my own mother would do that to me.
So I am turning to you for advice, support, and insights for ways to separate yourself emotionally and individuate from your parents later in life when you should've done so much much earlier. The adult part of me knows what I should do but there is also a part of me that is frightened. let me give you a snapshot of my life trajectory. The story is long but I want to give you as much contexts as possible. If you want a short summary of the dilemma, go to the last paragraph, otherwise, here is my life story (it is long because I want to give as much context as possible, and also show clues for the many different ways a narcissistic parent can disrupt your life): I grew up in a well-to-do family in an East Asian country, my parents gave birth to me when they were in their early 20s and just as their business started taking off in the 'boom years'. Both of them came from very broken family, my mother suffered poverty, abuse, and neglect from her parents (she did not speak to her dad until he died, and almost never acknowledges her mother). My father was the least favourite child in his family of three, he dropped out of high school, ended up on the street (and, as I learnt a few years ago, later in prison for getting into fights). My mother met my dad (21) when she was 19 and ran away from her hometown, they grew a very successful business together in the early to mid 20s and became incredibly wealthy for a society that is generally still very poor. I had a lot of luxuries in my early childhood, we had a car, I had good clothing, but my parents were never around. I started boarding at the age of 3, and generally spent most of my time outside of kindergarten and school with my paternal grandparents, and occasionally, my mum's mother. My parents fought a lot, and I remember my mother threatening to take me away from my dad and drove away from home with me in a car with nowhere specific to go. Once things got really bad and my mother told me that she is divorcing my father, and we even went into another flat (for a grand total of 1 day) before returning home. She emotionally smothered me, told me that she would die for me and nobody would love me as much as her. As the expression in our language puts it ' You are a piece of flesh fallen from my body'. She hit me a lot, often over small things , sometimes in public, I remember being thrown outside of our apartment and crying in the corridor. But I thought she was better than my father, whom, in my mother's words, would swiftly remarry in an event of her death/departure, and I would then be abused by another evil mother in law and her offsprings. My dad was completely absent from my childhood save for the first year (I remember playing video game, going to the park with him at the age of 3).
Although my family was wealthy, my mother took me out of the posh international school I was in after 6 months and sent me to a state school that is (in)famous for being extremely strict and militant. I was a 'good, smart kid' in primary school, but when I got to the state school at the age around 12 or 13, I became very depressed and that life has no purpose. I was falling at almost all school subjects (except History), and I started drinking (my dad drank a lot, and alcoholism is culturally tolerated if not perpetuated). At this point something happened that saved me in retrospect. My family decided to emigrate to an anglophone New World country and I went to yet another boarding school there. Yes, I experienced racism and generally felt horrible about the way I looked (not good looking in the Western sense or sporty), but I got to be separated from my family and grew as an individual. My grades got better, and by year 12, 13 I was among the best performing students. Between 13-18, I rarely see my father (perhaps once or twice a year), my mother would visit periodically, they bought a house next to the school, so I started to live in the house (mostly alone, sometimes with my mother and whatever hapless young women she manipulated into being her assistant). My parents couldn't speak English, and I dealt with most family matters, as with many first gen immigrant kid. By the time that I was supposed to go to university, I wanted to do law & politics at the public university in my adopted hometown but then my father intervened stating that I would never get a good job at a respectful company with a degree from the backwater 2nd rate university. He insisted that I should go to the U.K. or the U.S. He also stopped me from taking a gap year to travel, so I mostly stayed at home, played game, whilst being a driver and an assistant to them for a year. I regret not leaving home and getting a job. I applied to many universities in the U.K, Canada, and Australia, got into most of them, and ended up choosing the worst ranked university because I wanted to be in London. I couldn't do a conjoint degree so I chose to study politics (as that's what I was interested in). University life was eye opening, I got to see Europe, realised that the world was much bigger than the conformist, conservative East Asian country and the backwater suburbs with strip-malls and junk food stores I grew up in. But the degree did not prepare me for life, and all those years of bad parenting, emotionally under-development made me miserable in my first taste of adult relationships. I chose emotionally distant if not abusive friends, was a horrible person who hurt people who actually liked me and loved me. I did no internship or travel because I was expected to go home during school holiday, helping them move house, looking after guests, and being the 'little husband' when my mother was giving brith to my youngest sibling. I really wanted to stay in London, I looked for jobs, very random jobs because I had no life skills and never ever made my own money. So in the end, I left, and had to return to East Asia. By this time, my father had moved to another, more cosmopolitan East Asian city as his lifestyle became more and more extravagant. I lived with him and started interning at a fancy company in the culture industry. I worked there for almost a year hoping they would offer me a job, they did not. I got another job fairly soon in brand consulting, and finally at the age of 23 started making money. I had a relationship with an older woman, she was kind and tolerant, and I was an arse. I also realised that I cannot combine intimacy and sex at this point. I tried to start my own freelancing consultancy, acquired the ability to impress other people (faking it). Things seem to be working, I almost made enough money to support my life, but I was fundamentally lost and unhappy. I had the first depressive episode in my life. I wanted to go back to London, to get a Masters degree. So I applied and got into my dream school, my father agreed to pay for my education, so off I went to university again. That was probably the happiest year of my life, it turned out I loved elements of academia, research, being with other smart nerdy people. I met an intelligent, caring, and beautiful woman, and we moved in together soon after. I discovered more fulfilling, freer ways to live, I found proofs that a successful life was not just about working for an investment bank, or being rich. I wanted to be an academic, so I applied for a PhD at the school, and I got in after two attempts. Academia isn't all rosy, the work condition is pretty awful, the publish or perish mentality literally sucks every last bit of joy and fulfilment out of research, I loved teaching, but quickly learnt that teaching matters little at a 'research university'. I got fat, my relationship got really bad, sex became non-existent, arguments soon turned physical, and I thought that I was a real piece of shit and better off dead. The only thing that kept me going at the time? Bitterness and shame. I felt indebted to everyone, to my partner because I was an abusive arsehole, and to my family because I was stupid enough to do a PhD and wasting their money (and my life away). The pandemic hits, and sure enough, things got even worse, I felt like I couldn't carry on anymore and that I needed to radically un-f my life. My solution to this: was to finally become the person my family wanted me to be, filial, loyal, and rich. I was ready to threw my life in London away, everything, my home, my girlfriend, my PhD and move back to East Asia to become rich, and 'stop being a loser'. I came home to 'fix my family' and showered everyone with love and attention in ways I never did. I networked and explored ways to get into finance, and I got an at a VC firm. Soon enough, the whole thing completed backfired and my life started to unravel faster than I could count to three. I hated the internship, it fundamentally clashed with who I was and my value, I cried everyday in the toilet at work. I also broke up with my girlfriend for a person who was the poplar opposite of her that I had no attachment to (and sex was great because there was zero emotional intimacy). Within 3 months, I had very little savings left, was living in a short term rental apartment, and spent most of my time in bed and eating very unhealthily. Luckily, I had a therapist, a good friend in Shanghai, and my girlfriend was willing to give me a second chance. It was also around this time I realised how my family's (what do you even call it) emotional neglect might have contributed to my unhappiness and depression. I was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder and medicated, the medicine helped for me to move out of paralysis. But I wanted to tell my family that I am very unwell and get them to love me back, so I confronted them over things they have done to me as a kid and showed them the diagnosis. My mother did not handle this well. She called me horrible names, made fun of me, and accused me for being a horrible son. This whole ordeal made me realise that I needed to break away from them, and what I had thrown away in London was actually the most valuable things I have in life, a career, a family, my own identity. After confronting my mother over her abusive behaviour and emotional smothering, she vowed to never see me again. However, after 6-8 months, she sent me a large chunk of money for my birthday. So I, stupidly, let her back into my life again, a part of the reason was the financial help that I needed (to feel safe mostly), but I also really wanted to see proofs that my parents actually did love and accept me after all. At first, things got better, she came for Christmas, visited a few times, celebrated her birthday, and looked really happy. Both my partner and I spent a lot of time with her, bought her gifts, cooked for her, and hang out with her to make sure she feels loved. But soon, she started complaining that she actually had a horrible time and was mistreated by my partner. To make matter worse, a year and half after I left home for the last time thinking that I would never go back, my parents promise to buy me a flat (and started to pressure me to get married). I accepted the flat, thinking that it would offer stability and freedom (pushing away the past experience of their emotional neglect and abusiveness). Sure enough, the flat became yet another way for my mother to mess with my life. It had daunted on her that I am about to become my own person and live in the flat and start a family of my own, so she lashed out and said if my girlfriend lives there she would sue me and reclaim the flat. She then went behind my back and started disputing the flat's ownership. We have already spent a lot of time and energy planning the move and all of this is happening just 2/3 weeks from the move-in. I have a demand job that requires a lot of cognitive focus, and I feel like I am spending a decent chunk of my day trying to resolve the situation in addition to processing the emotional toll of having my own mother out to destroy my life. I know I have a job, a family, and my own life, and I have a good legal case, but I also feel so unsafe, violated, and confused. I can almost feel the voice in my head telling me that this is all my doing, and that I am too weak. It is like I know what I need to do cognitively but emotionally I am paralysed. Do you think what I mean? What would you do?

Saturday, May 25 - Friday, May 31, 2024

Top 60s

score	comments	title & link	mirrors
592	75 comments	[60s] Doug Ingle, Iron Butterfly Singer and Organist, Dead at 78
149	33 comments	[1969] Alice Cooper in February 1969 (by Ed Caraeff)
53	8 comments	[1968] Iron Butterfly - In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida [R.I.P. Doug]	[AM] [BC] [Dzr] [SC]
44	9 comments	[1969] Chicago - Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is?	[Sp] [AM] [Dzr] [SC]
14	0 comments	[60s] SMALL FACES ROLLIN OVER stereo

 

Top 70s

score	comments	title & link	mirrors
223	36 comments	[70s] I drew jimmy page
199	71 comments	[70s] The start of the 3rd Gen of Fleetwood Mac that pushed them into mega popularity and one of the best bands ever.
112	16 comments	[70s] That time Rerun tried to bootleg the Doobie Brothers
60	6 comments	[1979] The Police - Reggatta De Blanc. A great album
45	6 comments	[1974] Bad Company - Bad Company (1974)	[AM] [Dzr] [SC]

 

Top 80s

score	comments	title & link	mirrors
355	64 comments	[80s] Anybody know the original YouTube video of this? Jeff Beck losing his mind 🤯
187	85 comments	[80s] Forgive me father for I have sinned. It’s been 31 years and I’ve never listened to this full album.
66	14 comments	[1980] Joan Jett & The Blackhearts - Bad Reputation (1980)	[Sp] [AM] [Dzr] [SC]
54	13 comments	[1981] Stevie Nicks - Edge Of Seventeen (1981)	[Sp] [AM] [BC] [Dzr] [SC]
50	7 comments	[80s] Whitesnake - Still Of The Night (live at Donington 1990)	[Sp] [AM] [Dzr] [SC]

 

Top Remaining

score	comments	title & link	mirrors
361	75 comments	Breaking the what?
319	20 comments	Happy 79th Birthday to John Fogerty
198	40 comments	Out in the Backseat of my...
159	472 comments	Unexpected concert pairings: I was not expecting Bob Seger to be on the same bill as Rush, but there they were at this March 1977 show in New York. How about you? Ever been to a concert where two (or more) very unlikely classic rock acts were on the same bill?
143	17 comments	Live 1971

 

Top 5 Most Commented

score	comments	title & link	mirrors
84	279 comments	Best live songs?
48	51 comments	FavoriteTightrope? ELO, Leon Russell, Stevie Ray
19	22 comments	Station recommendations
58	18 comments	33 Years Ago Tonight: Poison with Slaughter & Bullet Boys in Atlanta / My 29th Concert / Ticket Price: 19.50
41	15 comments	The zombies

 

23F here. I was dating a guy, essentially a situationship from 2020-2023. In May 2023, we fell out & started seeing each other again in July. But we've been fwb rather than dating. Around Sept, he lmk there is a girl in another state that he's dating long distance & wants to be serious with. We still kept seeing each other b/c he said he was still "single". I believe he has been in a relationship with her since June 2023 but he did not finally claim her as his girlfriend to me until February of this year.
Anyways I still continued to see him despite knowing about the girl. I thought to myself well he was mine first. Very childish on my end, I know. I remember in December he told me was on vacay with this friends. The day after he came back, he was asking to see me. I found his gf's page a couple months ago & turns out, he was on a baecation with her. He was literally in Mexico with her for a week, just to cheat on her the next day.
Last week, when we were together, he even asked me for an orgy ( I said NO). So, I am sure he's sleeping with other girls too.
Yesterday morning, he asked me to come over. I said no bc of work, but what about this weekend? He said he'll be busy over the weekend but he can see me next week. I had an intuition that the girl was flying in this weekend so I check her IG & she's posting in his car. Mind you this is her birthday weekend. In the past, I have thought about telling her, but it was out of anger towards him so I chose not to. However, this time I genuinely feel bad for her. She's flying to her boyfriend's state to celebrate her birthday & little does she know her man was asking to sleep with me the same day she's flying in.
He has been sleeping with me for the entirety of their relationship. Should I tell the girlfriend over Instagram? Should I tell her from a fake page or my real one? I plan to tell the full story & acknowledge the parts that make me look bad as well. I can attach our messages for proof.

Hi, anonymous account due to privacy.
I'm at my wits end, I have been having these types of arguments with my now ex gf for the best part of 8 years. I come away feeling like an abusive monster, my self confidence battered, my entire personality in question. I need advice about whether she is right about the way I am, or if she's the one with the issue.
For the last 8 years or so these types of arguments started at least once a week and can last 3 to 5 days. This is a shorter one but the general feeling of this argument is identical to all others before it. Sure, there have been arguments before where I've been at fault, and her clearly at fault. I will admit to it if i do something wrong.
Please can someone settle my mind, one way or the other, and tell me if I'm really the monster she makes me out to be.
[01/06, 11:03] Me: Promised [son] I'd take him down seafront tomorrow and park. So can you make sure his earphones are packed, and if poss some suncream just in case? Hope you're OK
[01/06, 11:03] Her: Shit. This is what I’ve been explaining that I’m going to keep him away from!
[01/06, 11:03] Her: The noise
[01/06, 11:04] Her: This is why we are in today. He isn’t going to cope with the show. I took him last year and it was so awful for him
[01/06, 11:05] Me: Oh. OK. X
[01/06, 11:06] Me: Oops sorry
[01/06, 11:06] Me: I won't then.
[01/06, 11:06] Her: No I’m sorry it’s not you it’s the stress I’ve had trying to sort out my family staying away and not dragging us down
[01/06, 11:06] Her: If you want to take him, then you take him
[01/06, 11:06] Me: He was quite excited about it the other day.
[01/06, 11:07] Her: Just will 100% make sure that I’ve packed his headphones, blankies and that
[01/06, 11:07] Me: But I understand. It's fine.
[01/06, 11:07] Her: Yeah sorry I am a bit stressed this morning
[01/06, 11:07] Her: No [myname] if you want to take him, that’s alright, he’s your son too
[01/06, 11:07] Her: I don’t make all the rules and run everything
[01/06, 11:07] Me: No I didn't want to make it harder for you dealing with it before or after.
[01/06, 11:08] Her: You got a brain….Just make sure he’s actually alright down there and not struggling with the sensory. It’s because it’s crowded and then on top of that with the plane noise
[01/06, 11:08] Her: They practiced yesterday and he shit himself here
[01/06, 11:08] Her: I asked him if he wanted to see the planes and he said no
[01/06, 11:08] Her: No I don’t want you to think I’m just telling you what to do
[01/06, 11:09] Me: No need to say things like I've got a brain, it isn't about that at all. I just said I won't take him because I'm trying to be considerate to you after you've said it'll screw him up. Again trying to come from a place of goodness and somehow I get it wrong
[01/06, 11:09] Her: I’m not at all. I probably didn’t explain it in the best way. Just had [son] going at me all morning. Fucking foul mood. He don’t want to go out.
[01/06, 11:10] Her: No I didn’t mean it like that
[01/06, 11:10] Her: Sorry I’m not doing this. I’ve just bloody explained how I didn’t mean anything by any of that
[01/06, 11:12] Her: No I know you’re coming from a place of kindness. But
[01/06, 11:12] Her: I’m not going to feel like I’m bossing you about, because of the way I wrote my message
[01/06, 11:13] Me: Can't you stop and think for a second that I wrote that WHILE you were writing
[01/06, 11:13] Her: Yeah
[01/06, 11:13] Her: I said sorry.
[01/06, 11:17] Me: You've just made me out to be horrible again, saying things like "not doing this". When all I did was try to be nice. And when I try to reply you send a dozen messages and everything just gets mixed up. I wasn't being horrible or anything in the first place. I'll leave you be, but please bear in mind i wasn't being horrible or funny or anything at all and I wasn't "doing this". Hope you manage to settle down a bit and he behaves better.
[01/06, 11:17] Her: I’m sorry I didn’t mean to
[01/06, 11:18] Her: I think some times that’s a anxiety response
[01/06, 11:18] Her: Yeah and you know what else.. I am me. I send a lot of messages. I own that. Certainly won’t change
[01/06, 11:19] Her: That’s good you’ve probably got other people to talk to now as well. Pleased for you.
[01/06, 11:20] Her: Also can I just say, your message, is a pure example of what I went through last year. When I didn’t say anything wrong.. and I got told very often that you’re not ‘doing this’ now. Hard isn’t it when you read that? Welcome to the world I lived in last year.
[01/06, 11:20] Her: Funny isn’t it, when you’re wanting to talk to me and be with me.. you made sure you were messaging about [son] frequently. Now your head is turned, you’ve not really asked
[01/06, 11:38] Me: Pardon? I do ask about [son]. I've been busy as hell at work as it's half term, haven't been able to ask much at all. I asked yesterday about him. I saw him the day before that but asked about him that evening. I haven't really had a chance today because when I messages about tomorrow a different discussion started. So I don't know where you get your idea of that from. I didn't do anything at all tbh.
[01/06, 11:38] Her: I did say, that I didn’t mean to come across like that. You chose not to listen
[01/06, 11:39] Her: No no that’s fine
[01/06, 11:39] Her: I see what’s going on here tbh. It’s just so you. Find someone else to talk to, instead of healing and that, suddenly change energy and moan to other person about me 👌🏻
[01/06, 11:39] Her: That’s fine do what you want. If it’s true cool, if it’s not, okay 🤷🏻‍♀️
[01/06, 11:40] Me: It's actually a bit hurtful that you said about me not asking about [son].
[01/06, 11:40] Me: Huh what are you talking about
[01/06, 11:40] Me: You've completely lost me. What I'm doing here? What?
[01/06, 11:41] Her: It really dosent matter
[01/06, 11:41] Me: It's so me? I am utterly lost. You're making me out to be doing something and I really don't know what
[01/06, 11:41] Her: Yep course it’s hurtful. Everything what comes out my mouth is hurtful to you.
[01/06, 11:41] Her: I read energy
[01/06, 11:41] Her: You got someone else to talk to
[01/06, 11:41] Her: Hence why I don’t hear from you no more
[01/06, 11:41] Me: Have i? Who?
[01/06, 11:41] Her: Good for you
[01/06, 11:42] Me: What?
[01/06, 11:42] Her: Probably some woman who thinks you’ve been done wrong by me
[01/06, 11:42] Her: And she’ll tell you all the ways that you weren’t in the wrong. And I’ll be slagged off. Which is fine by the way.
[01/06, 11:42] Me: I haven't spoken to anyone other than my mum on messenger! And it's been super busy at work so I've not been on my phone!
[01/06, 11:42] Her: 🤷🏻‍♀️
[01/06, 11:42] Her: Just saying
[01/06, 11:42] Her: Didn’t say I was right
[01/06, 11:43] Me: My mum came down here yesterday on a coach trip and I met her at lunchtime
[01/06, 11:43] Her: That’s really nice I’m pleased
[01/06, 11:43] Her: I’m glad you saw ur mum
[01/06, 11:43] Her: Is she ok
[01/06, 11:43] Me: No you're not bloody right. But you're making me out to be doing something that I'm not.
[01/06, 11:43] Her: I did just say.. I could be wrong
[01/06, 11:43] Me: You're telling me what I'm doing. When you're wrong.
[01/06, 11:43] Her: Fair enough
[01/06, 11:43] Her: Listen to me
[01/06, 11:43] Her: I said I could be wrong
[01/06, 11:44] Her: I did originally say I’m sorry I didn’t mean to sound d like I was telling you what to do with [son]. But you managed to make something out of it by saying I didn’t need to speak like that. I’m well aware.. hence the messages before of me apologising..
[01/06, 11:45] Her: What annoys me is.. you having such a shit reaction to me saying I’m not doing this now. When I really did get laid into when I got upset for saying the same thing last year??
[01/06, 11:47] Me: Right so like I said before, I was writing my message out WHILE you were writing more messages. Hence me never being able to get any point or explanation across to you because by the time I say something you've already said more so what i say is either irrelevant or misunderstood.
[01/06, 11:48] Her: Okay
[01/06, 11:48] Her: Same
[01/06, 12:03] Me: I always try to read what you say. But it's not my fault if i can't write a relevant reply back before you've written multiple messages since I started. I had absolutely no issue with you at all and I've just been made out to be doing all sorts this morning and it's just not fair because I haven't done anything.
[01/06, 12:04] Her: I have adhd. I’m not explaining myself again
[01/06, 12:04] Her: I said you hadn’t done anything
[01/06, 12:04] Me: Not asking yourself to. Just explaining what it's like my position. Or am I not allowed?
[01/06, 12:04] Her: I just said I felt bad for coming across bossy. I dunno you apologise for the way you are, and it’s still not enough 😎
[01/06, 12:06] Her: Can we just stop
[01/06, 12:06] Her: We’ve both explained
[01/06, 12:06] Her: We both understand. Let’s not keep trying to get our last word in
[01/06, 12:06] Me: I know I apologise for the way I am and it's not enough. Never is. I understand you apologised.
[01/06, 12:06] Her: See now you repeating my messages back to me. Heal your shadow self.
[01/06, 12:06] Me: Yes I'd like to stop.
[01/06, 12:06] Her: Trust me
[01/06, 12:06] Her: Ok. I won’t message you again then
[01/06, 12:07] Me: Huh? You literally just said I apologise and it's not enough. I was just agreeing.
[01/06, 12:07] Me: This has nothing to do with healing myself I literally haven't done anything wrong.
[01/06, 12:12] Me: Fine, blame me for it all and blank me as if im the evil monster. Have a nice day. I didn't do anything wrong in the first place.
[01/06, 12:17] Her: Oh okay
[01/06, 12:17] Her: I haven’t blamed you for anything mr.
[01/06, 12:18] Her: I just apologised for perhaps coming across agressively. I’ve just spoken to [son], we are going to listen to the places from outside the front door. I mentioned about tomorrow with you, and he got a bit worried about the planes. So perhaps give me some credit for trying to encourage him to try. I do give you a lot of credit, and it’s often missed and forgotten about
[01/06, 12:19] Her: This whole way of you messaging is completely different tho to the person I spoke to the other day 🤔 just different eh
[01/06, 12:27] Me: How am I different? I'm just me. But you are the one that started this thing off by borderline insulting me and I'm supposed to just lie down and take it? Then I'm a shit person for trying my best to explain myself? I havent said a single bad thing about you yet I'm getting accused of being different? When I've explained to you, work has been super busy. I get the feeling, and have pretty much had it spelled out that you don't want to hear from me anyway so I can't exactly keep bombarding you with messages can I? Because then I'll just be annoying and you'll get pissed off hearing anything from me. I have literally done nothing wrong this morning. I react to your messages which are semi aggressive and your accusations towards me and I get told I'm being shit basically. All I wanted was to ask about [son] about tomorrow and I even said I hope you're OK. Was not being any different to anything, at least until i started having to explain myself.
[01/06, 12:31] Her: Honestly is that the best you have? I apologised. You’ve just kicked in back in my face. I choose not to engage in this back and forth. You need to learn to read, and also take knowledge in what I say to you.
I told you I apologised.. I said I am very stressed this morning. Very. But still you have told me yet again I was agressive.. we know? I’ve said that? Why keep telling me? My apology not good enough?
[01/06, 12:31] Her: Ending this conversation now tbh. I don’t need to be continuously told that I’m such an awful person. I’m really not. Not at all. I’m one of the good ones :)

Where to begin, I really this year to be a year I become something for myself so I wanted to go back and finish off my studying, only problem is that I live in a different country to where I am a citizen in so I tried to apply for a citizenship but when I was applying for it I didn't have the required proof that I was currently staying at the country I am living now so I was kinda devastated that I wouldn't be able to get my citizenship on time before university started. Because of that mental health got worse, I was getting depressed, I was jobless and it felt like no matter what I tried to make things better for myself and wanting to go somewhere with my artwork, nothing good happened, I just got so overwhelmed with everything that I became really tired of just doing anything. Then the worse thing for me could happen, my fiance of 4 years broke up with me without any warning, I guess in my own words she said I wasn't doing enough even though I tried to do more where I can, it just wasn't enough. My world just felt like it turned upside down from that point on, before then I would've done anything for her to now knowing her as the person who left me high and dry when I was at a low point without any form of warning, the worst part, she told me that if I tried and sorted myself out that she would consider getting back with me so I did, one of my best friends/ sister in law who witnessed the whole thing told me about a free therapist for under 25s so I went to therapy, sorted my art portfolio out, applied for jobs seeing that freelance art was no longer a viable option, anything to be self sufficient. When she found out I was doing all of this what was her response? "Why didn't you do any of this earlier?" It honestly crushed me when I heard those words from her like no matter what I do, it was never enough.
Now to mention all the other stuff that's been happening during those 4 months after the breakup:
.I applied to all the studios that I wanted to get into, even though I've been told by people and professionals that my art is good, I got rejected from all of them.
. My ex Fiance was still using my bank account, she was putting money in there to buy her own things but didn't even ask me to use my account and there were still subscriptions that were going into my account for stuff she used and I didn't, so I had to cancel my card.
. I am still jobless, even though I've been applying anywhere I am able to that I have experience in, and still had no response from anywhere I applied for.
. I've lost contact with most of my friends, whether it be from me being radio silent after the break up or some of my friends cutting contact with me because my ex got to them first
. A family member passed away
. I found that all of the things I've do or been feeling is because I have autism and that I might have high risk psychosis (I already knew I was austitic for a while now, I don't think I do have hrp, still that's not really something that you wanna find out through a study that you're involved in)
. My birthday recently passed, but I wasn't able to do anything because I was sick and almost all of mine and my ex's friends are on her side and haven't talked to me after the break up
. My ex broke into my place to get her stuff even though she agreed to do it when I'm home, twice.
. My mother, brother and sister in law are helping me wherever they can (brother and sister in law live in the same place as me) and I can't ever thank them enough, but at the same time I always feel like a burden.
. Tried other methods of getting new clients for freelance or find other ways to get into the industry even for something entry level or as a first step into getting in, but nothing was available.
. Applied for the required documents for my citizenship so that maybe I'll have a chance to go to uni next year, got rejected.
It just feels like no matter how much I try to make my life better or turn things around for myself something always have to get in the way and it's becoming too much now, doing art feels like a chore like no matter what I do I still won't get in, I don't feel safe in my own house because my ex has a key and I don't want to talk to her for a while after what she has been doing, I feel useless because it's been 4 months and I haven't been able to get a job, I can't even apologise for how much of a burden I've been to my mother, brother and sister in law, and overall no matter what I do to try and make things right for myself, something is always there to stop it. I wanted 2024 to be the year that I make something for myself, and now it's just become the worst year I've lived through recently. Maybe I deserve it, maybe I don't, either way I'm tired and I want to give up on everything.

1. Divide and Conquer - 4/5 (Slapper intro. Pretty good for a pilot episode, but it felt like they rushed into character drama a little too quickly. Like, I only JUST now met Robin and Cyborg for the first time, so this big breakup doesn't really hit as hard as I imagine it could had it been a later episode. The animation of this show is very fun and different from typical action cartoons, though. Stuff like the characters turning into chibis and going horrendeously off-model for gags is great stuff.)
2. Sisters - 3/5 (Immediately more character conflict and drama. I'd say this one works a little better, but again, I only really now just met Starfire, so there's not a hugely established friendship between her and the Titans enough yet. On the other hand, perhaps that's for this episode's benefit, as it's about her feeling replacable, which would not be very realistic after having been established as BFFs for several seasons. And I did think her and Robin's chat was really sweet, so whatever. Also, Blackfire is just a color swap of Starfire. Sunny Tennyson much?)
3. Final Exam - 4/5 (So this episode was the first to air, but is not the "real" pilot. Strangely enough, it would almost have worked better as a pilot, since it introduces the characters in their HQ immediately followed by showing how they work as a team. The H.I.V.E. aren't the most interesting villains but Gizmo was pretty amusing. What was with the lighting in the scene where they get out of the water though? Looked strange.)
4. Forces of Nature - 4/5 (Thunder's Sonic eyes is freaking me out. Please separate them... Anyway, decent episode, even if it's mostly just Thunder and Lightning wreaking havoc and getting moral lessons from Beast Boy.)
5. The Sum of His Parts - 5/5 (Fixit. Wow, clever name. Sarcasm aside, pretty great episode. It's interesting to see Cyborg's abilities explored, and the eerieniess of Fixit about to forcibly make him a full robot was highly engaging. Although while that IS the main story, the majority of this episode is spent with the other Titans fighting Mumbo Jumbo for some reason. Not that it's back, since I liked the zany wackiness of it. But it definitely didn't need take up that much time. Also, he briefly became a Canadian from South Park.)
6. Nevermore - 4/5 (Thunder and Lightning, Mumbo Jumbo, and now Doctor Light? So far this show has had really lame villains. Not that it's a huge detriment, because unlike other superhero cartoons, the focus in most episodes seem to be more on the inner workings of the Titans themselves as opposed to whatever villain they're facing, so I guess they just pick goofy ones to jumpstart the actual plots. Which in this episode was pretty amusing. Raven's a lot more mellow than her appearance would let on. I thought she would nearly murder Cyborg and Beast Boy for breaking into her room, but she was just slightly upset. Oh and, uh, what was up with intro being in Japanese?)
7. Switched - 4/5 (Just as I mentioned the villains being "lame" in the last episode, I thought Puppet King was pretty interesting. He's not like, compelling as a character or anything, but I found the puppet schtick fairly amusing to watch. As for the actual story, while "body swap" is not the most original idea for these kinds of shows, I still found it endearing how Raven and Starfire learned about one another. But the fact that they still keep their voices makes me go grrr.)
8. Deep Six - 3/5 (There's that Japanese intro again! Apparently it's used for episodes that are more comedic, while the English is for the "serious" ones. Guess I'll see if that assessment holds up under scrutiny. So this is mostly an underwater episode, which, while not a bad setting by default, feels pretty uninspired when it's nothing but blue backgrounds and rocks. Raven horning for Aqualad sure was a sight to behold, though. Felt a bit out of character.)
9. Masks - 4/5 (Wow, Red X was Robin? No way. It's not like they had the exact same voice or anything. Anyway, as good as this episode might be, it's really just some setup for Slade's schemes, which is really only vaguely hinted at whatever it is. As a result, I don't really have much to say. Starfire's lecture about Robin not trusting them was a bit "wha" though, because, yeah, if they knew Red X was Robin, they would've held back, and it would not be convincing.)
10. Mad Mod - 3/5 (Sheesh, this episode hurts my eyes. It's a funny one, though. And it has the Japanese intro, so I guess that fact about it was true. It's nothing but the Titans chasing some Brit for the entire episode. 20 minutes of pure zaniness. And Mad Mod was a pretty amusing gag villain. I also really liked the song "K2G" that played during that Scooby-Doo parody montage.)
11. Car Trouble - 3/5 (Gizmo drove away with Cyborg's car JUST as he arrived to confront the guys who initially stole it. He would have been right in the vicinity of it, how did he not notice it driving away? LOL. Also why do the two crooks calmly tiptoe around and vaguely say they "lost it" instead of just "some guy drove away with it right behind you like 10 seconds ago!".)
12/13. Apprentice - 5/5 (Slade merely wanting an apprentice is a bit of a confusing motivation. Like, for what purpose? Once he's fully molded Robin, what does he intend to do next? Take over the world? Not that it matters, since the conflict of Robin having to betray his friends to save their lives was thrilling enough. Although part 2 is obviously the better half, because the first is mostly just setup for that. Robin also makes a sick Batman reference, but can't directly mention him because of the Bat-embargo. LOL. Side note, the effect of the probes being the characters becoming...orange with a buncha circles wiggling around them was odd.)
14. How Long is Forever? - 5/5 (Robin just brooding in front of the speakers was funny. LOL. Anyway, the way time travel is handled here is confusing. I suppose it always is, but here it seems to function so that during the period Starfire was travelling 20 years, she simply did not exist during them. But she came back to the past in the end, meaning historically, she always returned. So instead of time travel looping around itself, I guess in this series when you travel, you're just gone. And if you return, the timeline you go back to will be a completely different one. That aside, it was neat to see the future Titans, although sheesh my guy Beast Boy aged horribly. And I find it hard to believe the entire city would become a dystopia like this, considering the Titans aren't the only heroes around.)
15. Every Dog Has His Day - 5/5 (Pretty solid for a zany comedy episode. Beast Boy becoming a dog to get bitches (pun intended) was funny. And the whole schtick of the Titans mistaking an actual green dog for him lent itself to a lot of good comedy. The reveal that that the dog is actually intelligent and can speak sort of "ruins" what made that aspect funny in the first place, but it doesn't affect the episode's quality or anything, so that's just a nitpick. Soto was pretty freaky though. Reminded me of Tiny from Ben 10.)
16. Terra - 4/5 (Yikes, Terra is scrawny. She's like a walking stick. I guess she has earth powers, although it's not really explored how or why. Though, at this point in the show, I've obviously learned that stuff is not something it prioritizes. Anyway, this episode is very good, but it's mostly just introduction to Terra and then a teaser that she is Slade's new apprentice victim. I'm interested for where that goes, but I don't have much else to say about this one specifically.)
17. Only Human - 4/5 (Not to go all Facts & Logic:tm:, but humans also have a limit to which they can use their muscles, so on a technical sense, Cyborg's conflict in this episode doesn't make much sense. Especially since he exceeds 100% by the end anyway, showing it was always possible. Not to diminish the story or anything, because I did find his conflict around it genuinely engaging. And the moment when he rises up to the challenge to actually beat Atlas is obviously very cathartic and rewarding. But also LOL that Atlas picked a beef with Cyborg over losing in a video game.)
18. Fear Itself - 4/5 (Here I spent the entire episode expecting the "obvious" reveal that everything scary that happened was a prank by the Titans to prove to Raven that she can be scared. Guess I was a little overconfident in that since it turns out she was just accidentally doing it herself.)
19. Date with Destiny - 4/5 (Hey, it's Spider-Man. I mean, Fang. That was a pretty freaky character design. Just a guy with a huge spider as his entire head. This episode felt like it ramped up the wacky animation to 11, particularly with nearly every motion Kitten makes. And that bit with Starfire's mouth falling into the punch stuck out, too. That aside, pretty cute episode. Starfire's jealousy is amusing.)
20. Transformation - 3/5 (Does the Titan Tower only have bathroom? That's ridiculous. It's huge! Anyway, not to complain about power inconsistency or whatever, but Starfire being able to instantly fly several hundred thousand kilometers away from Earth pretty much instantly, not to mention be able to breathe in space is a bit excessive. She's not Green Lantern... That aside, this was alright. It's neat to find out more about Tamaranians, but Starfire has already learned the "my friends will like me no matter what" lesson before.)
21. Titan Rising - 4/5 (Why is Raven so pissy at Terra? Like, I know she's moody and has a low temper, but raging at someone just trying their best? A bit out of character. That said, I still enjoyed the rivarly. I like Terra on the team. It's fun that they're expanding the roster.)
22. Winner Take All - 3/5 (Why does the Master of Games need people to lose a battle before he can absorb them and their powers? Why doesn't he just do it to all of them on the spot? I found it funny that Beast Boy lost the first round. When the episode began I was expecting some epic final battle between the three main characters. But nope, he just loses and is gone for the rest of the episode.)
23. Betrayal - 4/5 (That was a bit of a rushed betrayal. Terra is introduced in one episode, instantly leaves within the same one, makes a big comeback 4 episodes later, and betrays them in the very next while it's treated like some devastating loss to the team. Well, there is the game episode in between. But also she isn't even in that save for a silent cameo in one shot in the end, so that barely counts! That said I still liked the emotional beats of the story from Beast Boy's perspective and such, so I'm not hating on how this was done. I just think this could've meant more if she actually was a member of the Titans for the episodes leading up to this betrayal. On a lighter note, I liked Beast Boy's theatrical scenarios of how he should have asked her out.)
24. Fractured - 3/5 (So in-between the previous, serious, dramatic episode, and the upcoming 2-part finale which will obviously be about Terra, they felt they needed an episode about some annoying imp doing zany nonsense. Not that the show is a stranger to that stuff, but this wasn't nearly as charming as Mad Mod.)
25/26. Aftershock - 4/5 (Pretty standard "epic finale" fare, but obviously it's good because I liked this Terra arc, as rushed as it may have been. Her turning on Slade and even being the one who ends up killing him was pretty thrilling stuff. I didn't think they'd actually go that far, considering he's like the main villain of the series. But while that final battle between Beast Boy and Terra was pretty great due to the resonance and such it contains, I feel like the episode took up a lot of time having the Titans fight various miscellaneous characters leading up to it, that just wasn't as interesting. Side note, Raven and Terra just being colored completely brown to simulate being muddy stuck out to me. I don't know why. Mainly because most shows would draw wiggly lines to simulate the muddiness, not just one blank color.)
27. Deception - 4/5 (I know this show is episodic so stuff like this is bound to happen, but it is a bit eyerolling that characters seem to just learn the same lessons over and over. Like in this episode, Cyborg is beating himself up over being a cyborg, but by the end he accepts himself the way he is. A lesson he has learned in 2 episodes prior to this already. Not that I didn't think it was well done. His chat with Starfire was sweet, and the whole thing about him being undercover was entertaining too, so it's not much of an issue.)
28. X - 4/5 (So some guy steals Robin's Red X costume and takes up the mantle... But he also conveniently sounds exactly like Robin? Sure, because THAT makes sense. For the most part this episode is just baiting you into wanting to know who Red X is, but then NEVER answers it. Pretty rude. Nevertheless, it was still interesting. Also Professor Chang's design reminds me of Inspector 13 from Ben 10.)
29. Betrothed - 3/5 (Titans just casually flying to another planet like it's a mere road trip. OK. Is The Batman funding this or what? Also, that scene of Robin outside the spaceship made me LOL. Anyway it's interesting to see Tamaran thoroughly explored upon and such, but it's a bit absurd that every single person on the planet wears basically the exact same outfit.)
30. Crash - 4/5 (Cyborg's cybernetic features are confusing. Firstly, how could a digital virus affect his brain, which is clearly a biological component? Second, how and why are there red blood cells flowing in the "veins" of his mechanical parts? Nitpicking logic in a goofy joke episode aside, this was great stuff. I liked that they had to reluctantly get Gizmo to help, and Cyborg going nuts was just entertaining in its own right. I think the interior of his cybernetic parts were interestingly designed, and Beast Boy as an amoeba is just absurd but fun. Although it's inconsistent that he's able to talk while in that form, since he can't when he's any other animal.)
31. Haunted - 5/5 (This was pretty grim, but very thrilling. Given Slade was established as like the main villain of the show, even though it seemed obvious he was imaginary, I kept asking myself if he was actually real or not to come capacity, since I doubt the series would get rid of its main villain that easily. And well, they DID imply somebody else activated the hallucination chemical from the mask, so, like, yeah, he's clearly coming back. That said, if it was all in Robin's head, how did he get all those bruises and rips in his clothes? By punching the air? And why did Beast Boy have a cold in this episode? I guess they needed some comedic relief so it wouldn't be too grim for Cartoon Network.)
32. Spellbound - 4/5 ("Kardiak, you're under arrest". I get it. Because he is a heart. Pretty amusing. Anyway, yikes, Beast Boy sure was mean for NO reason. But the way they made up in the end with Raven even joining him and Cyborg's game of "stankball" was cute. As for Malchior, well, I thought he was a girl until he spoke.)
33. Revolution - 3/5 (Pretty much a rehash of the first Mad Mod episode. He has the Titans trapped in a maze of illusions and they chase him around and defeat him. Which I get is the whole gimmick since he's just a joke villain, so yeah. This was good, but not AS good. The pop-art backgrounds were pretty cool, and I liked how the British flag was the sky in the background the entire time. Plus, British Beast Boy was funny. The "message" about patriotism, democracy or whatever, felt a but muddled.)
34. Wavelength - 3/5 (I guess Brother Blood is growing to be Cyborg's arch nemesis or something. This was pretty average, so I barely got anything to say. Aqualad asks for help, so they take down Blood's underwater weapon and...Yeah. But I liked Bumblebee, and her fight scene with Cyborg had a lot of funny visuals. The bit where he shuts the door on her was amusing too.)
35. The Beast Within - 5/5 (This was great. You'd think it would be fairly predictable to tell a werewolf story with Beast Boy, but the execution really makes it work. Yeah, it's obvious he's acting strange because of the chemicals from the beginning. But his gradual shift from acting macho, to asshole, to picking a physical fight with Raven for NO reason was interesting because of how bizarrely out of character it is. Especially when his "beast" form took the Raven beef to the next level. But on top of that I especially enjoyed the twist that the Adonis guy from the beginning was a second werewolf, and the actual culprit. Robin seemed awfully quick to immediately lock Beast Boy away or straight up murder him though. For a guy who himself was blackmailed into being evil, you'd think he would be more considerate to other possibilities.)
36. Can I Keep Him? - 3/5 (This was alright. Pretty simple concept for a comedy episode is all. Beast Boy fosters a giant maggot and then it becomes bigger and dangerous. Kind of amusing how Starfire got more attached to it in like a day than Beast Boy did while hiding it for months. As a sode note, I liked the design of Rancids robot dog and dinosaur.)
37. Bunny Raven... or ...How to Make A Titananimal Disappear - 3/5 (Pretty good for a zany episode. The Titans as animals were amusing designs, and Beast Boy becoming a lamp instead was funny. Mumbo's song was catchy.)
38/39. Titans East - 4/5 (I like the concept of Titans East, although the only member I find particularly interesting is Bumblebee. I'm always fond of shrinking abilities for the potential practical uses that often go unacknowledged. She never really does anything with it besides shoot some lasers in the bad guys face, though. Speedy and Aqualad are kind of generic, and Más y Menos are just gag characters, so yeah. Cyborg's conflict here was pretty interesting, but the way he gets decapitated piece by piece was pretty brutal. But him sticking it to Brother Blood was pretty awesome, and I liked the sweet ending where he decides to stick with the Titans.)
40. Episode 257-494 - 3/5 (Steve Irwin gets mauled by a bear. Anyway, this episode is decent, but it's just an endless stream of references to other things, many of which I am not familiar with, so even as a comedy episode, a lot of the jokes don't work very well. That woman from the lame soap opera was still with Cyborg in the real world by the end because THAT makes sense. But it was funny.)
41. The Quest - 4/5 (Yeah, it was pretty obvious the old lady was the great master. Robin going through challenges was pretty entertaining though, but that snake one... He won by merely grabbing the snake? Sure, okay. The rest of the team dressing up as and pretending to be Robin was probably the best part, especially even Raven joining in.)
42. Birthmark - 4/5 (Welcome back, Slade. This was a very thrilling episode. Really just has you asking tons of questions. Like how is Slade back, why is he targeting Raven now, etc. But also, it was interesting how this potrays Robin and Raven as having a very close friendship. I mean I guess all the Titans are good friends, but these two haven't been explored as a duo at all, so it was interesting, if not a bit awkward.)
43. Cyborg the Barbarian - 4/5 (Silly concept, but I like it. Though given how time travel has been established in this show, Cyborg can't really do anything to affect the future, because everything he will do has already happened in the past. I like the design of the demon... Thingies)
44. Employee of the Month - 4/5 (I found it interesting how this acknowledges Beast Boy a physical task, as opposed to Raven or Starfire's breezy levitating. Beast Boy working at a meat shop itself was pretty funny, and the Tofu villain in the end sells the whole thing for me. LOL.)
45. Troq - 3/5 (The racism episode. The fact that we know what word "troq" is supposed to represent makes it very weird how often we see it used. I mean imagine an episode where they used the actual word this much... Yeah. I think this is pretty well done and what not in terms of being sweet and emotional, especially Cyborg's talk with Starfire and Robin instantly changing his mind on Val-Yor once he finds out. But the action plot they wrapped all this around didn't really have me hooked, and it's a pretty big chunk of the episode.)
46. The Prophecy - 3/5 (This is neat and all, but for the most part it really feels like nothing but setup for a grander plot than something to stand on its own. So while I'm sure the context of this will make the season finale more rewarding, this is just okay. I did get a kick out of Raven pulling up Slade as he was trying to leave just to jerk him around a little.)
47. Stranded - 4/5 (This is a fun episode, but it has one of the worst common TV tropes of all time; Character refusing to explain an easily explainable situation this creating conflict because of misunderstanding. I mean, yeah, Starfire DID describe what a "girlfriend" was, but then she just described what could also be platonic. Robin could have easily explained to her that there's a difference between platonic and romantic.)
48. Overdrive - 3/5 (I like the Billy Numerous theme music, but that's about it really.)
49. Mother Mae-Eye - 3/5 (Well, funny at times, I'll give it that. But ehhhh. Yeah, I don't know, there isn't much to be said here. Liked the scene where Robin spiked up his hair.)
50/51/52. The End - 5/5 (Yeah, pretty epic. The Titans using Raven's power was also cool. I was hoping to finally see Slade's face when his mask was knocked off, but I suppose a creepy half decomposed skeleton is also interesting... Don't really understand Trigon's motivation for, well, all of this though. He wants to take over the Earth and get rid of all life on it, just so he can sit in a giant chair and relax? I mean, the real story here is supposed to be about Raven, so I know it doesn't matter, but that's pretty thin for what's supposed to be the most threatening villain of the show to date.)
53/54. Homecoming - 3/5 (I love specific character focused episode where we see something more personal to them, but Beast Boy's background isn't that interesting and most of the team besides Elastigirl weren't very interesting. But I do find Negative Man's powers cool. Brain is a pretty cool villain too, I love his voice, really intimidating vibes. How are any of the Doom Patrol alive after what happened though? Never explained)
55. Trust - 4/5 (An entire Hot Spot episode? Interesting, since I always find it fun when shows divert from the main cast. Overall fun, but that ending was pretty frustrating though. Hot Spot was so obviously Madame Rouge!)
56. For Real - 3/5 (I do like the Titans East, but this was disappointing. I was hoping for more of a genuine episode in their own town, seeing their feats as a team and friends, as opposed to goofing off with Control Freak. Also one of the villains Brain had lined up two episodes ago is in jail here?? Were Más y Menos permanently translated to English for the audience to understand them? I mean I guess I prefer it, since having them two speaking what sounds like gibberish to the rest of the team makes it hard for them to appear as genuine friends, especially since they're mostly attached to each other as opposed to the whole team.)
57. Snowblind - 4/5 (Already loved Red Star and then he's immediately killed before my eyes!! Whyyyy! I was hoping he would gain control of his powers and aid the Titans. How has he still been getting tanks to fill up with radioactive liquid for so many decades though? And that's a pretty small room for two tanks a day over the span of decades.)
58. Kole - 3/5 (This entire season so far the Titans have just been around the world, given last time they were in what appears to be Russia, and now it's somewhere in Scandinavia. It's been an interesting change of pace, sure, but this episode wasn't terribly interesting. They meet some caveman with a little girl, Dr. Light is up to no good, etc.)
59. Hide and Seek - 3/5 (Bobby turning out to be real was a pretty fun "twist". Got dragged out for a while though.)
60. Lightspeed - 4/5 (Another non-Titan focused episode. Kid Flash is randomly horning on Jinx because why not, I guess? This Jinx redemption came out of absolutely nowhere, given how little we've seen of her prior. But Kid Flash is fun, so whatever.)
61. Revved Up - 3/5 (This episode is neat, but given how they are racing for the entirety of it, the constant action was pretty exhausting to sit through. Why did Raven sneezing and Starfire saying the Tamaranean equivalent of "bless you" inform all the villains they are Titans though? Also, infuriating we never got to see what's in the briefcase.)
62. Go! - 5/5 (Love seeing the origins of the team, though it's pretty oddly convenient that these 5 superpowered people (well 4 with powers) just so happened to stumble upon each other, same day, same time, same situation. I imagine shortly after this they occasionally stumbled upon each other trying to fight the same bad guy every so often and decided to start a team. Which would have been more realistic for their first interactions, not all 5 meeting at once. Pretty on the nose Batman reference but they still absolutely refuse to mention Batman.)
63/64. Calling All Titans!/Titans Together - 5/5 (Why is Beast Boy climbing up the mountain as a goat instead of just... Flying? This was quite the epic episode, I enjoyted the intensity of seeing nearly every hero be ambushed separately by different villains. It's a bit strange for the final part to mostly be from Beast Boy's perspective, and with the strange heroes he ends up meeting. I was expecting to see how the rest of the Titans made it to the Brotherhood of Evil base, but it's probably better this way, since it leaves it up to imagination, and it doesn't really matter. Seeing the brain finally defeated when all heroes went into battle was satisfying. Jericho's powers were pretty cool.)
65. Things Change - 4/5 (The amount of quiet and awkward scenes with that sad music was... Well, very strange. The whole Terra thing is a bit weird like, sure, if someone you don't know jumps up to you, acts as if they know you and tells you you've gotten amnesia, you'd think they were insane. But Beast Boy surely has photo proof? Or if not, he could get testimony from the rest of his team?? No??? It doesn't have to jog her memory back, but at the very least she'd realize the truth and know who she was instead of just being so vague and saying cryptic things. Some things she said implied perhaps she did know, because any real person would just yell out the weirdo stalking them, not give emotional speeches about the girl you once knew being gone etc. But all that aside, why did Slade send a robot out just to tell Beast Boy that he had nothing to do with what's happened to Terra? Also, that creatures ability to turn himself into any matter he touches is really cool.)
Movie: Trouble in Tokyo - 3/5 (This has pretty much one of the things I dislike most about movies based on TV shows; Instead of actually focusing on the iconic aspects of the series in question, it goes out of it's way to be as far removed from it as possible by setting it in a whole other country. Bummer, because an ideal Titans movie would really focus on the whole team, and THEIR city. Instead, they're just in Tokyo stopping a corrupt commander (who I knew was gonna be the bad guy from the get-go) who's creating crimes to be a hero. And the thing is with these kind of movies is, perhaps if they actually did focus on the characters relationships, it would be good. But instead they are mostly separated the entire time, just goofing off. And cue the obligatory relationship between Robin and Starfire. I mean, it was obviously going to happen, so it's not as if I mind it, but the drama feels pretty forced. They're heroes, yes, but they lounge around and take time off all the time when criminals aren't around. There really isn't much more to say about this. High-tier average. Although, admittedly, I was finding myself ready to close my eyes and fall asleep nearing the hour mark.)
-The Lost Episode - 3/5 (It's half the length of a normal episode, so it's hard to judge it, given it's not even serious at all. A fun little watch, for sure. Beast Boy walking around with a boombox on his shoulders was funny because of how dated it is.)
-New Teen Titans Shorts (Can't really rate them since they're just shorts, but here's a few throwaway thoughts: I like the artstyle. The lowercase T tower is a funny visual gag. Was Blackfire just killed? So, they finally actually showed Batman on screen (technically)? The hell was up with Cyborg's voice in one of these?)

Disclaimer: This post contains a very long text. Reading this might be difficult (Unless you're a Bookworm)

1. Meggy: She really pisses me off. The first reason is that the way the SMG4 Production turned her into a human was ridiculous. It felt like a overrated Netflix Drama. They probably made her like that to merchendise and get more attention. The Second reason would be her behaviour. She used to be kind and respectful (even as a human). But she's now a bossy show off. She thinks that she knows better than Mario and mostly gets sad or shocked when she looses in a Argument. Luke and Kevin, you can still save her character tho. It's not too late.
   
2. Karen: I don't remember one single time laughing at her. She's so unfunny. It feels like if SMG4 was running out of Ideas and thus created her. I also get annoyed by her Dialog.
   
3. SMG3: Wasn't he supposed to be a villian? Better yet: Is he still a villian? There never were any real moments where SMG3 said that he's no more evil. The show just continued without his evil shenanigans. From a clumsy evil guy to a King of dead memes to a Café owner. The Notebook joke from WOTFI 2023 (was it even a WOTFI?) became unfunny. It went from funny at first to unfunny due to the way they overused it and don't get me to SMG3's lines. I cringed so hard whenever he said Baka. Good thing he doesn't mention it anymore.
   
4. SMG4(The Character): I don't mean Luke irl. I mean the Asian with the Blue cap. I don't mind the redesigns. I understand why they changed it but his behaviour got bad. He became sort of a "narcissist" Person. He mostly cares about memes (which is not funny nowadays) and milks Mario for Views (Genesis Arc). He even destroyed Peach's Castle over a stupid meme. I feel like he's gonna start WW3 one day cause of memes.
   
5. & 5. SMG1 and SMG2: It feels like they're only there for the Genesis Arc. Their Backstory and the multiverse thing was annoying and lame. Rewatching their backstories actually made me laugh. It feels like the Genisis Arc forced us to feel empathy for the people there. They're supposed to be Master Splinter and Sensei Wu, except that Splinter and Wu are well written Characters. SMG1 is actually not that bad but SMG2 goes like: "NoOoOoOoOo! SmG4 aNd SmG3 nEeD tO tEaM uP oR eLsE tHe wOrLd eNdS ßwe08fp0fzh8p293fogz2g09üe8dfzß01ß!!!". Also why couldn't SMG4 and Mario just talk to Susan (Former CEO of Youtube) during the arc? She literally has a Remote that can control time and room. Anyways, like I said. SMG1 and SMG2 are lame.
   
6. Axol: The Reason I hate Axol is because how he lost his personality. In his first appearances he was actually alright A artist who was passionate about his work and kept his cool. But then he was used for a Romance Plot and after was killed as a sacirifice in the genesis arc after that. Probably because the Producers didn't know what to do with him anymore. Why do you have to kill a Character when it was no use anymore? They could have just made Axol move back to Japan instead of killing him or not make him appear anymore. There are so many SMG4 characters that aren't used anymore, which didn't get killed and people were fine. Anyways, let's head to Number 3.
   
7. Peach: I hate Princess Peach from old and modern SMG4. She used to be abusive and mean around Mario but that was still funny sometimes. For Example: Peach actually made me laugh at the "A Theatre Mario" Video but after 2019/2020 she just started to rage and yell at everyone for no reason which is just got more and more lame and overused. They probably abondened her due to how many OC's there are. But besides that I'm kinda glad they stopped using the character by not killing her. At least she's gone now.
   
8. Kaizo: Since we talk about abondoning Characters. Kaizo was also kinda abondened. According to SMG4, people donated 13.000$ for Kaizo. I am not sure if that's true but if it was then imagine how dissapointed people must have been. 13K! You could buy a OK Car with that amount of Money. Besides that Kaizo was kinda irritating but I still prefer him than Nr.1 Character on this list.
   
9. Melony: Yes, that's right. It's obviously Melony. The reason why I hate Melony is similiar to Meggy. Melony's first appeared in Christmas 2019 video as Watermelon but became more Popular in the YouTube/Replacement Arc and I admit that I actually liked her but all of this ended after the "Mario's Mask Of Madness" video and the genesis Arc. They literally turned her into a Watermelon Waifu like "OMG! It's a Waifu!". The Fans noticed that and even Luke and Kevin know it. They even made a joke about it in a video (I think). Like how the YouTuber SMBD12 said: "Acknowledging it doesn't make it any better. It makes it worse!". Melony was most likely created not because of Passion but because of Simps. I'm not talking about Fozzie. I mean it in general! ACTUAL SIMPS! Another reason why I hate that Fruit Waifu is because she's so unfunny! All she does is sleeping and being "cute". I don't remember any Moment where I laughed at Melony. I feel like they forced me to empathize with Melony in the Genesis and Revelations Arc. Watching Melony getting her Powers and using her Sword feels like a Zelda Ripoff. I don't even find her attractive. The Watermelon seeds on her Face actually look like Cat whispears. If there is ever gonna be a Arc where Melony dies, I won't feel a single thing about her. In Fact, I'm gonna be glad. At least she is appearing less. That's it.
   

Anyways, so yeah these the 10 SMG4 Characters that I don't like. Who is your least favourite SMG4 character. Comment down below

23F here. I was dating a guy, essentially a situationship from 2020-2023. In May 2023, we fell out & started seeing each other again in July. But we've been fwb rather than dating. Around Sept, he lmk there is a girl in another state that he's dating long distance & wants to be serious with. We still kept seeing each other b/c he said he was still "single". I believe he has been in a relationship with her since June 2023 but he did not finally claim her as his girlfriend to me until February of this year.
Anyways I still continued to see him despite knowing about the girl. I thought to myself well he was mine first. Very childish on my end, I know. I remember in December he told me was on vacay with this friends. The day after he came back, he was asking to see me. I found his gf's page a couple months ago & turns out, he was on a baecation with her. He was literally in Mexico with her for a week, just to cheat on her the next day.
Last week, when we were together, he even asked me for an orgy ( I said NO). So, I am sure he's sleeping with other girls too.
Yesterday morning, he asked me to come over. I said no bc of work, but what about this weekend? He said he'll be busy over the weekend but he can see me next week. I had an intuition that the girl was flying in this weekend so I check her IG & she's posting in his car. Mind you this is her birthday weekend. In the past, I have thought about telling her, but it was out of anger towards him so I chose not to. However, this time I genuinely feel bad for her. She's flying to her boyfriend's state to celebrate her birthday & little does she know her man was asking to sleep with me the same day she's flying in.
He has been sleeping with me for the entirety of their relationship. Should I tell the girlfriend over Instagram? Should I tell her from a fake page or my real one? I plan to tell the full story & acknowledge the parts that make me look bad as well. I can attach our messages for proof.

23F here. I was dating a guy, essentially a situationship from 2020-2023. In May 2023, we fell out & started seeing each other again in July. But we've been fwb rather than dating. Around Sept, he lmk there is a girl in another state that he's dating long distance & wants to be serious with. We still kept seeing each other b/c he said he was still "single". I believe he has been in a relationship with her since June 2023 but he did not finally claim her as his girlfriend to me until February of this year.
Anyways I still continued to see him despite knowing about the girl. I thought to myself well he was mine first. Very childish on my end, I know. I remember in December he told me was on vacay with this friends. The day after he came back, he was asking to see me. I found his gf's page a couple months ago & turns out, he was on a baecation with her. He was literally in Mexico with her for a week, just to cheat on her the next day.
Last week, when we were together, he even asked me for an orgy ( I said NO). So, I am sure he's sleeping with other girls too.
Yesterday morning, he asked me to come over. I said no bc of work, but what about this weekend? He said he'll be busy over the weekend but he can see me next week. I had an intuition that the girl was flying in this weekend so I check her IG & she's posting in his car. Mind you this is her birthday weekend. In the past, I have thought about telling her, but it was out of anger towards him so I chose not to. However, this time I genuinely feel bad for her. She's flying to her boyfriend's state to celebrate her birthday & little does she know her man was asking to sleep with me the same day she's flying in.
He has been sleeping with me for the entirety of their relationship. Should I tell the girlfriend over Instagram? Should I tell her from a fake page or my real one? I plan to tell the full story & acknowledge the parts that make me look bad as well. I can attach our messages for proof.

Hi, I have no kids and I need advice!
I'm throwing a party for my 35th birthday (Saturday, mid-August).
A handful of friends have had babies in the last few months/weeks. Many others have toddlers and kids up to 9/10 years old.
How can I best accommodate new parents and their kids? I have been to plenty of baby and kid birthday parties, so I am not entirely clueless about activities, but I am sure there are a lot of considerations for new parents that I would not be aware of.
Some ideas and questions. Please let me know what I am doing wrong and what I am leaving out.

• Invites -- I assume new parents will default to "no", but I would like to be able to say I've made the party "baby friendly" so they can at least stop by. Maybe a small window of time, even prior to the start time for adults. Thoughts?
• Entertainment -- I plan to have a small kid's table with coloring books, stickers, maybe temporary tattoos. I may be able to borrow a Little Tikes bounce house. I will get those easy hose-inflatable water balloons, bubbles,Any other ideas?
• Food -- IDK what is best for babies or picky eaters. Lots of water and juice boxes accessible. Grilled cheese. Ice pops (and I'm thinking about arranging for the ice cream truck to stop by or doing ice cream sundaes). Later, there will be a fire and smores.
• Comfort/safety -- I have a nice outdoor couch. Ill have plenty of shade. Lots of fans in case it's hot. There will be music playing over speakers.
• In-ground pool -- Can't avoid this one. Once you're in my backyard, there is no fence or gate to the pool. It also has a ladder instead of steps. Should I get some floaties? I have plenty of floats and pool noodles. It's never been a problem before.
• Inside -- It's usually quiet inside while we have parties. I only have 1 bathroom. Should I set up a changing table or nursing area? I can let them in my room.

What am I overlooking? What else can I do? What red flags did I list?
I want everyone important, friends and family, to be there. I don't usually make my birthday a big thing, but I am turning 35 and my GF and I are a few years away from being ready to have kids. I'm the fun uncle so I want the babies to be accommodated and my niece and nephew to want to stay. Thanks!!

So I (15f) and my friend Riri (not her real name, also 15f) we met 2 years ago. She was a transferee student on our school with my best friends, Elena and Gina (not their real name). Riri was my classmate during that time and we kinda just became friends.
Riri didn't have anyone to talk to and I was separated with my best friends so I invited her here and there eith my best friends. We hang out very often and she was really fun to be with actually. We continued this for a while until one time I was absent and Riri was alone in our class.
2 girls invited her in recess, stuff like mostly we would do. I was thankful to the girls who joined her when I wasn't there with her in class. The day after that, I wanted to ask her what I have missed but she kinda gave me a weird vibe like she didn't want to talk to me but when the 2 girls talked to her, she was so happy and everything.
I didn't feel jealous but I kind of didn't like her attitude towards me 'cause I was absent. I said sorry to her but she ignored me. She eventually talked to me when we were assigned on a group project and we had to work together. So we made up. It was really awkward but I was fine with it because she finally made friends.
Few weeks has passed and we still are talking. We were okay and close even. One afternoon, when it was our dismissal at school, it was our sched to clean the room so Riri and I with our classmates cleaned for 30 minutes but I noticed something off with Riri.
It was raining so our teacher basically made us clean the classroom longer than usual since some of us didn't bring an umbrella. Riri was rushing to clean and I thought she was hurrying cause she didn't bring an umbrella but I found out that a boy was peeking at the door with the 2 girls that are Riri's friends.
Mike (the boy) (15m) was my classmate when we were in middle school. I asked him what he was doing outside our class, peeking. He didn't respond and one of the girls said that Mike was waiting for Riri. I was shook ngl. He was a pretty quiet kid so I didn't expect that he would be interested in someone.
I was so shocked that I asked Riri what was his relationship with Mike. She said he was her boyfriend so I freaked out it was such a big news because their relationship was cannon fr. It was the buzz on our class and even the other classes with the same grade level as us.
Even Gina and Elena were shocked. They were together for about 2 and a half months when Riri's sister was suspicious on Riri cause she was going home later than usual. Her sister decided to have a plan that she will catch Riri with her boyfriend.
Her sister was against of her having a boyfriend cause they were young. (like I totally get it cause we were 13/14 cmon.) one time when me and Elena and Gina were chaperones of Riri and Mike, Riri's sister caught them both.
Mike was a quiet kid and cares of how people will see him and anyone around him, so when her sister caught them, he immediately went home cause Riri's sister was mad. He didn't bare to look at Riri getting shouted because of him. (He so soft Ik)
It was so awkward for us 3 cause what were we supposed to do there. We left and after that, I found out Mike wasn't responding with Riri's messages. I first thought that Mike was an a-h0l3 cause he didn't talk to Riri after that day. Few weeks passed by and Mike couldn't handle it anymore and broke up with Riri.
Riri felt devastated but later moved on. Not too long actually. Like about 3 months of moving on, I found out there's someone who was being shipped to her by our classmates. I thought it was a very handsome guy (Naurrr HE FR IS A FAILED LAB EXPERIMENT, 😭😭) Let's name him Ace.
This man (16/17m) Ace was the COMPLETE OPPOSITE of Mike. If Mike was Extremely handsome and attractive, Ace is.... Uh.. You finish the puzzle. Not just looks okay? Even his acts. Mike is a gentleman and a green flag, he is very respectful. Meanwhile Ace is uh.. Forget it.
I asked Riri if she was okay and asked her if she liked Ace back and boy I wish I didn't ask cause she said yes. I looked at her with a "Bruthuu Eughhh" ahh face but she just smiled. I was really against her being together with that creature cause she doesn't deserve him. SHE DESERVES BETTER.
Long story short they got together. 😭 This was when I started disliking her. Her attitude and the way of her speaking wasn't her anymore. She was supposed to be this girl with a very cheerful nice shy girl vibes then it suddenly turned to a smiling and irritating girl dog. (b1tch)
She turned to a b and I dislikef her for that. Her attitude towards me was so freaking disgusting just because of a man.
Additional tea... We kind of noticed that she was getting bigger on her chest and hips.. Her stomach is looking like it has a bump but we ain't sure yet until one time, we were painting.. We sat and rested. While I was taking pictures, I caught a perfect photo of her sitting. When I went home, i scrolled my gallery cause my mom asked me for photos and asked me what was the girl sitting's name is and she was talking about Riri. I said her name and asked me if she has a bf. I said yes. She said she looked pregnant and I had goosebumps. It hit me. I connected all of it and it made sense. I once saw Riri and his bf going somewhere sneaking out of our school campus when we were having a school program. I went to get some water and that was where I saw them sneaking out. 2-4 hrs later, I saw them again sneaking in our campus. I was with Elena this time and noticed Riri was like exhausted or sum like she gave us a tired aura.
I am fr disappointed cause this girl was a really good friend and a smart person I know and I can't believe that she would be impregnated by a random man who isn't even in her league tbh. 😭 Y'ALL AM I AN AH0L3?? 😭😭😭

Here's a big fat receipt that should be added to the archive, I pulled an all-nighter compiling this into one post. Major credit goes to the vigilant members of this sub & the great information I was able to scour through .
Congrats on identifying Drake's bad behavior with women. I was unsure about the best way to present this because it requires some delicacy & subtlety. During one of my recent deep dives for another piece, I discovered something quite unsettling. I'm aware that there will be a lot of criticism to my post, but I had to say it. People will tell me it's nothing, but Drake's actions speak for themselves.
Before jumping in, I don’tunderstand why this behaviour is getting unchecked. My narrative is completely alleged & all of this is public information.
Let's start from the beginning shall we…
May, 2010: Drake calls a girl on stage fondles the girl and kisses her neck and the crowd cheers along with it. In his defense, he doesn't ask the girl her age but how does it make it any better. He still fondled her without asking for consent in front of a crowd of people.
When the girl tells him that she's only 17 he tries to remedy the situation by saying "how the hell she looks like this" and "you thick". He jokes he can't go to jail and the crowd cheers along with it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fp5b9dW1nrA
If this was the only time that Drake did something like this, I would have called it an honest mistake but sadly it's not it.
Year 2016: https://mtonews.com/drake-groomed-hailey-baldwin-at-age-14-then-started-dating-her-at-18
Drake knows Hailey Bieber(nee Baldwin) when she was 14 years old and has been a "good friend" to her. They know each other 'cause Hailey is bestfriends with Kendall and Kylie.
In 2016, Hailey was just nineteen where as Drake was twenty-nine. It's legal but here is the deal. Drake knows her since she was fourteen and Drake is good friends with Justin Bieber, Hailey's then ex boyfriend. Him going after Hailey immediately after her breakup with Justin makes zero sense, ethics wise.https://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/drake-is-pursuing-hailey-baldwin-w20858I mean why would someone go after his friends ex who's 10 years his junior?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-90gjG044IQ
Drake also got himself a similar "h" charm necklace that Hailey had a penchant for wearing. Ignore Justin in the background for a second and here it is. https://www.youtube.com/shorts/V_91WJgGVQw
Year 2018: Drake and Bella Harris met when she was sixteen. Her dad's a famous producer. https://www.kanyetothe.com/threads/drake-and-bella-harris-timeline.8088605/
When she turned eighteen Drake rented an entire restaurant for her birthday. Um what? I get that they can be friends but she's just 18 and he's 31. https://www.eonline.com/news/968171/drake-and-rumored-girlfriend-bella-harris-enjoy-intimate-dinner https://www.wmagazine.com/story/bella-harris-who-is-drake-girlfriend
Also, in 2018 Drake went after the weeknd's then ex girlfriend Bella Hadid. Abel and Drake have been mates and collaborates since 2010. Drake helped Abel to step in the spotlight while Abel helped with writing Drake's album, Take care and also lend his vocals.
After her split from the weeknd and around 2018, Drake threw Bella her 21st birthday party. Looks like drizzy really likes throwing birthday parties. https://www.elle.com/culture/music/a21999080/drake-bella-hadid-romance-references-in-finesse-lyrics/
Take note that this has happened two times where Drake has gone for his mates exes and I know Hollywood's chill with it but this just feels emotionally predatory. It's not like he doesn't know these girls, he knows them since they were teens. It's not random.
Year 2019: Billie Eilish defends her texting Drake. Drake's 33 and she's just 18. She even comments that Drake's at a level that he doesn't need to be nice to her but that's a whole different level of power imbalance. https://www.buzzfeed.com/terrycartebillie-eilish-revealed-that-drake-texts-her-creepy
Maybe I'm reaching and they are artists and Drake is interested artistically and helps her with the industry but it just weird.
Millie Bobby Brown: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lYZPKh74Li8
I can't with this interaction. For one second I was ready to ignore all of the above but this? A 33 year old texting a 15 year old girl that he misses her? and talks about boys? Tf is wrong with people justifying this? People are saying it's innocent but she was 15 and I don't think any grown man should be talking about these things with a 15 year old. Also, Millie posting this https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/2018/09/210592/millie-bobby-brown-defends-friendship-with-drake
There is also this thing with Drake and the Kar-jenners and I don't know what to think: https://people.com/tv/kylie-jenner-drake-spending-romantic-time-togethe
https://twitter.com/WizMonifaaa/status/1467919407095681028/photo/4
https://hiphopdx.com/news/id.56014/title.drake-does-damage-control-after-referring-to-kylie-jenner-as-a-side-piece-on-old-song
Drake performed at Kylie's sweet 16:- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWX-I6n-AQg
I wonder why no one is calling this out in light of the overall situation. Do other people observe this too but are they ignoring it? or am I overanalyzing this? I'm honestly not sure if this is predatory behavior at this point or if something is being misinterpreted since Drake is in the spotlight. Drake is a wealthy man, so what is going on with his management? If all that is occurring is coincidental and benign, then why are they allowing this to happen? To be honest, I'm not sure about it. I just wonder what Drake is doing with all these horrible stories coming out of the industry. The narrative around him changed over night it seems even though a lot of this has been known, but many just turned the other cheek.
Taking Drake down is just cutting out one head from hydra & another will likely take his place but what it WILL do is send a message to the higher ups that we aren’t slow & it’s just a matter of time until the truth comes out & people will have to face the music.

TLDR: I want to give you benchmarks and scientific processes to understand the outcome of the 2024 election without any prejudice.
There are many opinion polls and analyses that are giving extreme predictions of 2024 outcome like one from Parakala Prabhakar predicts ~150 seats for BJP and some others predict 375. Coming from a family of politicians .Without any prejudice let me explain how the process works and how to get a correct sense of the election. Thumb rules: I will give a detailed explanation later, but please keep these rules in mind. 1. Elections are won by grassroots cadres who bring voters to the voting booth. You cannot win elections unless that happens.

1. Voters vote in their best interest and they have clarity on that and the illiterate/poorly educated ones have better clarity. Voters are not stupid or could be fooled or people's mandate can be stolen.
   
2. वक़्त करता है परवरिश बरसों, हादसा एक दम नहीं होता : Things doesn’t happen all of a sudden, it happens over a while. Likewise, people don’t change their minds just because X incident has happened. Let's say on a weighing scale while pouring peanuts on one pan, on the 100th peanut scale tilts on its side so we cannot categorically say that the 100th peanut was historic or there is something special about it.
   
3. Media and money cannot buy votes.
   
4. EVMs cannot be hacked/manipulated.
   
5. In God we trust, others bring data.
   

Let’s say you go to a Mercedes showroom and say to the salesman that you have a strong feeling that I should own this Mercedes and even all my friends feel the same. You are not going to get that Mercedes unless the sum total of the money in your bank is more than what the price of the car. If not, then the salesman would ask you to get lost, the same thing you should tell anyone who analyses something based on their feeling. This is why analysis of Parakala P can be dismissed as he has mentioned in the beginning that it is his feeling.
Next in line are charlatans like Yogendra Yadav who with their sweet talk mix data with their feelings. He is taking data from previous elections and mixing his feelings to predict the outcome. I would trust the analysis of Pradeep Gupta or News24 Today’s Chanakya. These people have a very high rate of predicting election outcomes correctly, we need to understand their methods and how they can predict them correctly.
To understand their methods, we must first understand how people arrive at a decision to vote for a specific party.
Every party has 3 distinct types of voters:

1. Core voters: These voters will vote for a given party even if the sun rises in the west. A classic example is BSP. Its core voters are the SC/ST community and without any effort or presence in media or SM in the 2022 UP election, they got ~13% vote. Every major party has 10-20% (of the total eligible voters).

The core voter base will vote for a party even without a leader, even if leaders engage in crimes or corruption, it doesn’t matter. Long back I asked an old man who would vote for in a gram panchayat polls? He said, Indira Gandhi. At that time, I thought the old man was delusional however, I now understand that he voted for Congress because he felt obligated to vote for Indira Gandhi even if she died 3 decades ago. A core voter feels a lifetime obligation towards a specific party for any specific incident that has changed their life. E.g. Core voters of Shiv Sena voters vote because Shiv Sainiks saved their lives in the riots post Babri demolition or BSP voters vote for Kanshi Ram because he educated them about their constitutional rights and gave them a dignified life.

1. Loyal voters: These voters are loyal to a specific party/leader however, they have a defined fault line and if their party/leader crosses that fault line they vote against that party/leader. E.g. a BJP voter has a fault line of Hindutva or nationalism and if they feel that fault line is crossed they would vote against BJP to express their anger because that fault line is crossed. As long as the fault line is not crossed the party/leader engaged in crime or corruption doesn’t matter. The percentage of loyal voters changes each election, but you cannot win unless you have ~15-20% loyal voters. Floating voter: This voter would vote based on his criteria and perception however this kind of voter is usually in the range of 5% of the total voters. Core voters form the bulwark of the party and support the party voraciously even at it’s lowest point, these voters keep the party alive in its bad days, but you cannot win the elections without the support of the loyal voters. These voters along with the floating voters help the party cross the finish line which is usually 30-45%. When an incumbent party loses elections with a major loss, it usually means the loyal voters have voted against them. Floating voters matter when there is regime change because, in that kind of a fight, every vote counts. Bhau Torsekar , a Marathi journalist had accurately predicted 2014 and 2019 results without any survey and wrote books on he arrived at these figures. Let me summarise his methodology. He has identified swing seats, i.e. a constituency where the difference between the 1st and 2nd candidate should be less than 15% or BJP had won that seat in recent part, which he calls fight seats, i.e. seats where a party has a realistic chance of winning. That number was close to 300 and with Modi as PM candidate and Amit Shah as strategist of UP state that swing of 15% was achieved and in some cases even more and that is how the majority was won. Anyone who was closely involved in that election would know what fever was there to elect Modi. I personally remember that my family members who were loyalists of Congress had been angry with Congress since 90s and would say that they would now vote for Vajpayee just before going to vote and for Congress. Despite the disgruntlement and a charismatic leader like Vajpayee, they voted for Congress. The breaking point came when the Congress leadership behaved in a very high-handed manner with my Uncle and refusing to meet him, which was considered as a big insult by his supporters. BJP leadership grabbed the opportunity with both hands, had a series of meeting and scales were titled in 2014 election. 5 lakh voters switched from Congress to BJP and they became loyal voters of BJP. This fever I had seen in my colleagues and neighbours. With all the scandals of the world, bad publicity and wide-scale protests, Modi’s allure, and Shah’s micromanagement, unprecedented rise of 8% in the polls, the BJP’s vote share rose by just 12%. For India alliance to come tilt the scales, they will have to raise their vote share by at least 10% and I see no signs of that happening. Having disgruntled voters is one part, but disgruntled voters are not going to switch parties unless the opposition has addressed all the needs of the voters. Predicting 2024 elections: Please watch this video before making any opinion. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hwnnn1M-T5U . Here Shekhar Gupta speaks his observations on how he saw that Modi was able to deliver social benefit schemes to people( meanwhile he was making videos onhow bad modi's defeat would be in 2014 elections.) .

Most voters in India are directly dependent on the government’s social benefit schemes and it used to be a struggle to get those benefits from Sarkari babu. Modi turned the tables and made the Sarkari Babu struggle to deliver the promised benefit. The voters is mostly voting for his issues like water, food, social justice, and security. He is not bothered by Modi being a dictator or a democracy in danger. For them, issues can range from getting 5 Kg of free rice to road from village to highway. If that is done he is happy to vote for the leader who has done that.
Please take these factors into account.

1. 55 swing seats are there for BJP.
   
2. The vote share of the India alliance will fall. Why? Because the cadre is leaving these parties.
   
3. The vote share of the BJP will rise because the above cadre has come to the BJP. Tag this with streamline and tight control of central leadership.
   

While most people will call Amit Shah as Chanakya, I see him as a top class administrator who has set processes for the BJP karyakartas to execute their task which is mind-boggling. These guidelines come with minute details like font size. There are leaders like Amit Shah or better in other parties however, they have not given a thought of putting down their experience on paper making guidelines, creating a robust feedback system, etc. You can consider BJP like McDonald's which has detailed processes to replicate the success in every franchise, while the other parties are like top restaurants in your city which are top class where they operate but cannot take their success beyond that restaurant because they have not made their restaurant process oriented.
The best-case scenario for BJP is 355 however, 325 would be a rational figure.

Buckle yourselves in, potatoes. This is a LONG one, but I am SPILLING the tea.
I (17,f) have had a rocky relationship at best with my brother, ever since we were young. This has evolved into a lot of fights and disagreements, which I am aware that most siblings have, but this argument was the final straw. This argument started off with me coming into his room to see why the younger two have been yelling, and saw one crying because the youngest (3,f) one had gotten herself stuck on the top bunk. My brother (who we will call G-) was gaming and completely ignoring the situation. I fussed at him for ignoring them, looked up, and saw the mountain of laundry and blankets he had been told to do previously by our mother. I asked him why he hadn't done it, only for him to outright ignore me, focusing on his game. I asked him again, no response. I looked at the plug,and looked at him, and moved my hand onto the cord. "G, I will pull the plug if you don't respond." That got his attention. He looked up with a dead-eyed glare, and asked me what I wanted in a similar tone of voice, before turning his attention back to the console. (This is not new behavior, he has acted this way since we were 10 and 11.) I was tired of it. I told him to turn it off, and to pay attention when he was being spoken to. With our younger brother in the room, he also told G to stop and to listen. G rolled his eyes, and reluctantly turned off the match. I looked at him, arms crossed and leaning on the console, asked him why it was so hard to do what he was supposed to. After several minutes of silence, I waited for an answer, then I asked him again. He rolled his eyes, and told me I was making a big deal out of nothing like I did every time I confronted him. I was not mad, I was just fed up, at the end of my rope. I told him that it was a big deal to me, for him to be ignoring the kids and ignoring the ONLY job he had to do. *For a bit more context, G likes to ignore his jobs, then the jobs get pushed onto me and the middle child, A(m,13). G is fifteen. He has gotten us in trouble for not doing his jobs, like the laundry, dishes, sweeping, ECT. He was supposed to do the job before gaming to begin with. I got angry with how he was acting towards me, and told him I wouldn't be making a "big deal" out of everything if he actually did what he was supposed to and pulled his own weight. He retorted with "I didn't ask you to keep me in line," with that same dead glare. I snapped back with "well nobody asked you to be so incompetent that you can't do anything without having our parents tell me to come up behind you and make sure you get your jobs done!" Things escalated, then things shifted to the kids... I don't remember how, but the two youngest (m,6 and f,3) were brought up. I asked him if he wanted the same relationship with them like he had with me.
He went silent.
My flabbers were ghasted, waiting in the silence for a physical answer, but the silence was telling enough.
"Do you even want a relationship with them?"
Silence.
Something in me snapped, and everything shut down. I looked at him dead in the eyes, and said "I do not care about our relationship. It is non-existent. We are strangers under one roof... But the kids need their oldest brother. You better fix everything with them and build a proper one with them." He asked me if "I was done and when I would leave," and told me he was "waiting for me to leave so ge could game." Ha. Yeah, I was done.
The next morning, I sat him down and asked him if he thought about what he said... This boy told me the only reason he dislikes me so much is because I kicked him out of my room three years ago. (BS, and he was avoiding the question. I just think he doesn't like me because I am the only one who will put him in his place constantly. I keep him in his jobs and chores, and he told me to my face that he didn't care about me, so there's that, too.) He glared at me, then the floor, and said "I guess I'll be a big brother to the kids." In a dead voice. It sounded like SUCH an inconvenience to him, and I won't force him, but to hell with letting a six year old and three year old deal with that BS, especially if he still bullies the youngest boy.
He is known for bullying the youngest boy, and in turn, I am very protective of both kids. The youngest boy (6) has made it clear he didn't want to be around him, and I cannot blame him. If I have to, I will keep the kids from bonding with him, but I am trying to give him a chance, even if we are done with each other. Mom wants me to let G "mature", but should I even bother with it? I made my mind, I don't want anything to do with him, but would I be the asshole for keeping the kids away from him?
Edit: Okay, for context, my parents work a lot, and I'm with the kids most of the time. Mom gets stressed and sick easily, she works two jobs, and does her best. Dad works a lot as well, and he's trying to manage us and Mom. Mom is currently in the hospital, which is why I haven't brought anything up about this conundrum to her, and Dad has been stressed with work and Mom being sick. I am the oldest, so babysitting and watching the kids is my job. They know I take on a lot, and we've been trying to make it work.