Barcelona President Laporta: “As Barça fan, it’s not good news to see Mbappé to Real Madrid”.
“But to be honest, I prefer our strategy to trust a project with players produced and made in La Masia”.
“I respect our rivals but I keep our Philosophy”,
“Xavi told me that he trusted this team, but then some of his statements looked like he changed his speech”.
“It caused me to rethink… and I had the feeling that I had to do a change, also with the same feeling shared with the board”.
“I started thinking of Flick as Barça manager since I re-joined the club”.
“He started studying the team right after Xavi’s announcement. All the reports we have on Flick were super positive”.
“Deco and Bojan also had same feeling, Flick had to be our coach”.
“Robert Lewandowski has rejected important financial proposals to stay at Barcelona”.
“Victor Roque? He’s adapting to our world, our club and new environment, he’s getting the right rythm”.
“I don’t think we will go for big names, as well as we don’t plan to sell our stars”.
❗️ “We’re looking for new winger and new midfielder”.
“We also have our own talents who could cover those position”.
“We want both João Félix and João Cancelo to stay, Deco’s working on it”.
“João Félix’s quality is something excellent, I’m happy with his season”.
“Hansi Flick already wanted João Félix at Bayern”.
“We do not need to sell one top player, with the current financial situation it’s not needed”.

Hello forhire!
My company is excited to be opening up a part-time role for a Content Marketing Specialist. We are about a ~1 year old business that is rapidly expanding, headquartered in TX (USA) but with teams around the globe. We found one of our absolute best people on reddit so I'm happy to be back.
Role: Content Marketing Specialist
Details: 20-30 hours per week
Rate: $600-1000 per month
We love regions such as Philippines, Pakistan, India, Romania, South Africa - the vast majority of our team is located outside the US.
All of the details are located at the job description below - we're looking for someone to tell our story in multiple different formats, across many different channels, in a unique, innovative, and NOT BORING way!
Please read through the job description at the link below. To start the process, please comment and then message me the following:

• As many sentences as you feel necessary for introducing yourself (name, location, years working in content, LinkedIn, years working remote, whatever you want to add)
  
• 2 sentences or less of why you are applying for THIS job
  
• 3 sentences or less of your experience and how it fits with THIS job
  
• 2 sentences or less of what you are looking for in your next role
  

Job Description: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Ku0_uOijrLAVsZh9WxyzKoredE_1jU4Wx4GNJ3kn8GU/edit?usp=sharing

RATING = NAME (POSITION) = AGE = TEAM = MARKET VALUE = STATS

• 7.7 = Kevin De Buyne (AM) = 32y = Manchester City (EPL*) = € 64 M = 4 goals & 10 assists
• 7.2 = Jeremy Doku (WNG/FWD) = 22y = Manchester City (EPL*) = € 70 M = 3 goals & 8 assists
• 7.1 = Leandro Trossard (FWD) = 29y = Arsenal (EPL) = € 40 M = 12 goals & 1 assists
• 7.1 = Wout Faes (DEF) = 26y = Leicester City (EFL-C\) = € 20 M = 2 goals & 0 assists*

• 6.9 = Amadou Onana (MID) = 22y = Everton (EPL) = € 48 M = 2 goals & 0 assists
• 6.9 = Youri Tielemans (MID) = 27y = Aston Villa Birmingham (EPL) = € 25 M = 2 goals & 6 assists
• 6.9 = Casper De Norre (MID) = 27y = Millwall (EFL-C) = € 2,5 M = 1 goals & 1 assists
• 6.9 = Nicolas Raskin (MID) = 23y = Glasgow Rangers (SPL) = € 7 M = 1 goals & 1 assists
• 6.8 = Dennis Praet (MID) = 26y = Leicester City (EFL-C\) = € 5 M = 0 goals & 1 assists*
• 6.8 = Ryan Mmaee (FWD) = 26y = Stoke City (EFL-C) = € 3 M = 3 goals & 3 assists (plays for Morocco)
• 6.7 = Timothy Castagne (DEF) = 28y = Fulham (EPL) = € 16 M = 1 goals & 3 assists

Spelers uit EPL / Spelers uit EFL-C & SPL
* = hun competitie gewonnen en/of promoveren naar hogere klasse

chapters 1&2
chapter 3
chapter 4
chapter 5
chapter 6
chapter 7
chapter 8
chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
The place where Gentry’s fleeing instinct ultimately guided her wasn’t in the middle of the crowd. In fact, though she initially wanted to get rid of the pursuit among the many people walking outside at this hour, the panic made her sight latch onto the nearest escape route that was within the narrow alley: a metal ladder leading up one of the buildings on the side. Her understanding of the hounds’ design said that it was impossible for them to even jump on those hooves let alone climb anything that wasn’t specifically planned to be climbable.
Bless the excellent human knees!
Her calculation was lightning-fast: if the hound was too fast for her to reach the open space in time, the robot could simply crush her bones with a single step, but there was no way it would follow her in the vertical direction.
Right?
It seemed to work. One good leap of the short lightweight body, and G was able to grab onto the bottom bar of the ladder to climb up as fast as possible. Without looking down, she kept on climbing up and up, towards the roofs, hoping to lose the pursuer and escape without much trouble. She only hoped the beast wouldn’t use any kind of harpoon to drag her down. That would definitely hurt.
Only after her feet thumped on the solid horizontal surface of the roof did she dare to look down to see that the offending machine wasn’t anywhere to be seen. She double-checked that it wasn’t making its way up with some ropes and hooks, but it really did look like she had lost it.
Was it that easy? A bit of vandalism and a good old run for your life? Or was the machine counting on her gullibility and was ready to strike once she came down?
Better find a way to the ground as far from here as possible then.
The building she was walking atop was nothing special: a five- or seven-story concrete box with some giant vents and metal structures spread around. She had an excellent opportunity to see what those self-building structures looked like up-close. Vertical pipes that peeked out of the unfinished walls were spraying on the new layer of dissolved concrete. If the article she read were to be believed, the daytime sun was going to evaporate the excess liquid throughout the day, hiding these ducts within. In the evening, a team of construction hounds would come here with the new quickly-assembling pipeline to extend those.
This meant that there had to be a way down that those hounds could climb: a way for her to escape!
Careful with her step, Gentry went around the perimeter until she saw it — the door in, human-sized, completely normal.
And, of course, locked.
No other entrances were to be found and after briefly considering another act of vandalism, Gee decided against it in fear of being deported for municipal property damage that couldn’t be explained by self-defense this time.
She had a lot of experience thinking her future excuses through!
Instead, she walked around the edge of the roof again, this time looking down in search of another ladder that could take her back to the ground without alerting the hound, but instead, she noticed something peculiar: what she initially thought was a square building seemed to have a small dent that stretched all the way from the bottom up, forming a little dead-end that cut into the concrete structure from the alley with the vending machines.
What was more peculiar though was the fact that the hounds below seemed to gravitate towards the dead end, disappearing there in neat rows, as if the building itself swallowed them together with the cargo they carried.
They weren’t going after her, were they?
Gentry looked back at the door in panic. A minute passed, but no sirens, blinding lights and orders to freeze seemed to be coming out.
Puzzled, she lay on the edge of the roof to watch the ant-like stream of robots that turned from the alley into the little nook. None went out. The machines queued in an orderly fashion, waiting for their turn to go in. Then, she noticed the big hound she had just encountered. It strode from around the corner, as if it was circling it in search of its prey in vain. Gee noted with satisfaction that its broken camera made its motions lose the cunning agility it had before it dared lay its paws on her.
Not so smug now, huh?
The hound took its place in the queue and after a short delay at the entrance was allowed in.
Had it alerted the police? Do they know her location now? She’d better run away then. Or...?
Gentry used the same ladder to get to the ground, and, unable to resist her feline curiosity, carefully approached the dead end, standing to the side of the neat line of the hounds that seemed to ignore her completely. Some of them were light delivery ones, no bigger than a lap dog, larger ones carried heavy containers on their backs and in the extendable hammock-like fixtures under their bellies that allowed to fit more weight. Every single one stopped for a split-second in front of a gaping gate before an affirmative signal confirmed that it could proceed into the dim insides of the building. Sometimes, the scan took a second or two, but all the hounds got in.
It looked like it was the entrance to the underground transportation system that distributed mail and goods around the city.
Should she...?
Gentry made a step sideways, cutting into the line of the hounds that didn’t seem to mind much. But when her turn to be scanned came, the approving sound didn’t come as fast. Then, a low-pitched negative beep announced that she wasn’t allowed in.
Well, no surprise there.
G ran the experiment a couple more times to make sure the system wouldn’t glitch and let her in or somehow otherwise change its mind. She briefly considered just running inside and hoping the gate wouldn’t chop her in half in an attempt to stop the intruder, but then decided it wasn’t worth it.
Did she really need to know where the hounds were going? If her hooved attacker had snitched on her, the authorities could arrive any minute… Besides, Ashtapada was a city run by AI and machines, if it didn’t want to let her in, it probably wasn’t a good...
Then, something changed in the routine at the gate. The hounds, as if at the click of a switch, stopped approaching the gate and stepped to the side, clearing the way. A sound of giant vents came from within, bringing an overwhelming stream of warm air, indistinct machinery noises and... a smell of something intoxicatingly sweet.
The sweetness in the air momentarily dizzied Gentry’s sugar-deprived brain, and she nearly forgot to step aside too, narrowly avoiding the first hounds that appeared from the mouth of the tunnel, bringing their own boxes and containers, like industrious little bees arriving at the hive with their fresh booty.
Could they be transporting something sugary in the middle of the night? The pink-haired assistant made it clear that any “stimulants” were banned in Ashtapada, but perhaps the elites could enjoy a little smuggled sugar as long as the rest of the citizens didn’t know they were doing so.
If this was the case, she had to find out how to get some. The hounds that carried the cargo out of the gate looked too secure though so it was not a good idea to rob the outgoing caravan waving a Jolly Roger flag, but if she could sneak in...
The mysterious gate was probably the best place to hide, as well. Since no human was allowed in, the potential police squad would never think to look for her there. She’d investigate where the sweet smell was coming from and then, in a matter of hours, she’d reappear on the opposite end of Ashtapada. She could claim she wasn’t here at the time of the incident. The little nook didn’t seem to have any cameras, so to complete the alibi…
Gentry took her wristcomm off and quickly hid it under a broken vending machine nearby. Suppose she’d lost it earlier that day…
It was just a matter of fooling that scanner now.
The machines that patiently waited for their turn to come in weren’t all filled to the brim. G approached one of the bigger ones that didn’t have any cargo loaded under its belly and carefully tapped it on the muzzle. It shook its head like a nervous horse but otherwise didn’t protest, which was encouraging. She pulled at the fasteners below like she saw some people do and the extendable mechanism easily unfolded into a cot-like shelf that was supposed to fit in some extra load. With one last apprehensive look around, G climbed onto it, fully expecting to be shaken off by the beast, but the hound showed no signs of discomfort. As far as it was concerned, it just needed to carry a little extra.
It took some waiting before the stream of the hounds coming out ended, together with the sound of huge fans and the dizzying fragrance of sweetness, and Gentry’s hound started moving again. Like all the other machines, it patiently waited for its turn and after a while, stopped at the gate to be scanned. G stopped breathing.
Could it really work?
Beep.
Was it affirmative?
The hound started moving.
It was! It was! She did it!
Still not daring to breathe, G lay down even quieter in case there were more scanners in the depths within, but the hound just happily strode along, the cot swaying gently, as if there wasn’t live contraband strapped to it. The dim lights of the city night went out completely, and G couldn’t help but feel that she was being carried into the depths of hell, lured by a sweet smell of temptation, with no way out. But perhaps, if she found the source, looking for the black market wouldn’t be necessary: she could borrow some sweet stuff from where it was kept and restock her stash from time to time with no one needing to know. Like this, her life in Ashtapada would be set, the only missing piece of her sugar addiction falling into place and completing the puzzle of a perfect place to settle: advanced free society, beautiful men, and desserts.
There were more beeping gates and scanners of sorts, but none of them picked up on the intruder, however much Gentry sweated and squeezed herself into a ball. It felt like several hours, but could have easily been mere thirty minutes of travelling through dimly-lit subway-like tunnels. Then, she felt before she saw it: a change in the way the sound travelled in the surrounding air. While they were carelessly clip-plopping through narrow tunnels, the sound of the metal hooves of dozens of hounds on bare concrete filled Gee’s ears with a lulling monotonous cacophony. However, now the sound stopped bouncing off of the walls and started echoing. She realised they were coming to some kind of clearing, or at least a bigger hall which was in turn exuding its own set of mechanical noises.
Judging by the echo, they were still underground and, by the feel of it, had only burrowed deeper. Gentry peeked out and checked for any witnesses.
No glory in being captured after pulling something like that!
Then, when the hound was passing a pile of containers stored in a relative disarray, she rolled out of the cot and swiftly hid behind them, hoping no one saw that manoeuvre, and strained her senses.
No human voices, no obvious cameras.
G finally looked out and her breath was immediately taken away by the sheer vastness of the space. Her whole communal block could probably fit under the giant concrete dome that housed what looked like one of the inner organs of the city, full of conveyor belts, hounds, pipes and who knew what else, all entangled in an ordered network, working in perfect sync, like a grandiose mechanical ballet.
From behind her hideaway, G could see the interlude that she unwittingly had taken part in. The stream of loaded hounds of all shapes and sizes came in endlessly, dropping their boxes and containers onto the moving belts that branched out, carrying the cargo somewhere she could not yet see. The belts separated into narrower ones, merged with others and spread through the whole enormous space, from the floor to immensity above, no ceiling in sight.
Gentry couldn’t see where the light came from. It was brighter than in the tunnels she had travelled through, but no light fixtures were visible on the walls. The only sense one could rely on was hearing: the sound of whizzing and clicking from up there that hinted at more transport belts.
The belts at the floor also distributed new boxes to the hounds that dutifully started their journey anew, no doubt ready to emerge from the building at the end of these intestines, and deliver the cargo to the impatient citizens up above.
It was still too hard to see the rest. Because of how massive the space was, Gentry could only see a small part of it, so she carefully relocated in her hideout to see better. What she finally saw after daring to quite literally stick her neck out blew her away. The place seemed to be a central node of sorts, with the city’s most important systems intertwining in a hypnotic pattern. No, nothing like that could have been designed by humans. That, right there, was the genius of the AI at work. A force as powerful as millions of years of evolution that came up with the human brain must have designed this place and perhaps many others like it.
The transport belts Gentry spotted earlier disappeared into and emerged from one of the four giant tunnels. It was clearly the mail and delivery system.
The hounds like the one that brought G in picked up their new cargo after dropping the previous load and got back to work, but some went into another tunnel. After paying a bit more attention, Gentry noticed that all of them were damaged somehow: some limped, some sparked, some had to be dragged by their hivemates to what appeared to be a repair facility.
Two more openings in the bare walls seemed more mysterious: one belched steel pipes so huge that a highway could easily fit into some of them, most disappearing in the fourth tunnel that no hounds and belts came near. Some pipes, like conveyors, branched out into smaller ones and went into the rest of the other two, or even grew into the walls like roots of a gigantic tree.
These definitely didn’t look like the neat and straight pipes that brought concrete to the unfinished buildings above!
Was it the bio-fuel that the corn factories produced to power the city?
No matter.
There was no security in sight. Was it safe to come out?
Getry took a step outside the pile, then another, but when nothing reacted, no sirens went off and no warnings were barked, she decided she was probably good.
Ashtapada is a city of personal freedoms, right? There was no “NO ENTRY” sign, so technically, she didn’t break any rules by coming here.
After a while, Gentry got even more bold, casually walking around the hounds that paid her no mind. It was time to return to the issue of the sweet fragrance that lured her here in the first place. Despite the overwhelming smell that hung in the air, she soon identified that it was most potent near the fourth tunnel that swallowed most of the pipes.
To her dismay, there was no way she could explore further, though. It was blocked by two huge fans that were installed on both sides of the pipes like two humming sentinels. They tirelessly pumped out the saccharine air from within and into G’s long-suffering nostrils. Both were as big as a grown human and would easily fit Gentry if only she dared to slip between the spinning blades.
What was being made there, behind the fans? And why did it require so much fuel being pumped in?
Gentry waited for a while, hoping that the fans would stop their ceaseless rotation and give her a chance to sneak inside but after a while her patience ran dry. Alas, they just mocked her with a promise of unlimited heavenly treats but kept the ecstasy just out of reach.
Growing bored and frustrated, she decided to track the pipes back to where they emerged from tunnel number three in search of another secret entrance, but to no avail: there was no way she could even crawl in between the giant metal tubes let alone somehow make her way into where they appeared from. She did notice something curious however: a small fleet of deft little spider-like hounds climbed the pipes here and there, looking like they were inspecting the metal surfaces and seams, scratching and knocking on the exterior and tightening the bolts from time to time. Some of them seemed to patch up the pipes by welding the leaks if the small cascades of sparks that spilled from above were anything to go by.
Wasn’t ethanol supposed to be highly flammable?
Although Gentry was utterly overcome with the immensity of the place, she remembered to take it all in hopes that Sereen would answer the hundred of questions swarming in her head.
Who built this place? Why did it smell like this? What was behind the fans?
Looking for a better angle to look at the evasive robotic bug crawling up the pipe, G stepped into something sticky. A leak. A fresh stream of the substance that had just been fixed by a robot that narrowly escaped her attention dropped thick strands on the floor, the puddle already starting to harden.
It didn’t look like any fuel she’d ever seen before.
Was it... a syrup?
Against her better judgment, without knowing if it was safe, Gee scooped a little viscous fluid with her index finger and gave it a cautious sniff.
It smelled sweet. It smelled like... corn syrup, there was no doubt about that.
Should she...?
Tentatively, Gentry licked the thick drop and her senses screamed in delight.
It was sweet!
Narrowly resisting the temptation to fall on her knees and lick the rest of the syrup from the floor, G sucked the rest of the sweetness off her finger. Through the haze of excitement, questions started popping up in her head.
Upon her arrival, she was shown the great expanses of corn fields just outside Ashtapada and told that it was the backbone of the city’s energy independence. The corn was made into bio fuel, ethanol, that powered the whole city and kept it fumes-free, effectively making this place the most eco-friendly city on the planet, every motor running on electricity, every light bulb being effectively zero CO2. The corn provided so much energy that there was no need to rely on burning coal and gas.
But why were the colossal pipes leaking something sweet?
G couldn’t stop thinking about it on the way back, safely tucked under the belly of another docile hound. She came out of the dark womb of the underground undisturbed, the scanner ignoring the intruder again, and breathed in the early morning air of the surface.
She needed to go back and see what was behind that giant fan.

Hey all, not sure if anyone else has ever dealt with this issue but it's been frankly, quite annoying. It doesn't break anything nor does it really impact anything in terms of media preserving but Plex is constantly deleting and then adding the same media, specifically music for months.
This only happens when I have manual deletion turned off, if it's not automatic this does not happen (but it will trigger if I do a refresh of the library).
Link below is what it looks like - at first I thought it would be just Artist names with special characters like Björk, however it affects everyone from Justice, Alcest, to DJ Seinfeld. The weird part is it's ONLY these same artists. I've tried deleting the entire folder and re-adding them myself, not sure what else to do.
https://imgur.com/a/kmvcrse
Set-up information is as follows:
Lidarr handles all tagging, retrieval, etc.
Synology 920+ for where the files are stored
Mac Mini M2 Pro for the "brain" of the server
Any ideas?

I work as a frontend developer and throughout my career I've always worked with multilingual web apps. Even though there are many options available, I thought that my vision is different enough to create a side project out of it.
Check out:
https://contentstorage.app/ (waitlist)
Images from the app: https://imgur.com/a/udFlWbj
Problems I'm solving:

1. Overview of your application content. Tools I've used usually look like tables in a database - huge lists of data, but no clear structure to it. I wanted to approach solving this problem with a tree-like structure (think wikipedia style sidebar), so you can navigate and find parts of you application content easily.
2. Translation key mess. Devs have usually been the ones who are creating translation keys which consist of context + the term name. The problem I've always seen is that structure is difficult to maintain, as different people have different ideas on what is the correct context for a term. You can force rules but I have an easier solution for it - automatic translation keys based on the structure of you app. If you want to add another section, its like adding a branch to a tree, which can split to separate pieces.
3. Assets and translations together. To me it makes much more sense to keep images and other static assets together with text (like a mini CMS), and when you do changes, you invalidate the cache for both and users will get the fresh stuff.

I hope this also resonates with someone here and I would be really happy to get some feedback (good or bad) on what you think of this.
Also, what do you think of the waitlist page? Do you think it gives across somewhat of a vision of what the application is? If no, what to change?

Hello!
My name is Victor, I'm 25 years old and I would like to find people to have interesting, intellectual and emotional conversations with. I truly like to discuss about ideas and people's life or personality, so if you like it too, don't hesitate to message me!
Because you'd probably like to know a few things about me, I finished an undergraduate degree in sociology recently and am about to either pursue a master degree of research in political science or a master degree of european affairs. Before that, I didn't go to uni because of depression, which I partly got over thanks to books, books with whom I have a very special bond now. I'm reading a lot of different things, from literature to philosophy or social sciences, so there's potentially a lot of things that we could talk about. Apart from that, I'd say that my second biggest passion is music. I used to play the drums, have been playing the guitar since I was 18 and tried to start bands several times in my life. I'm quite into guitar music (Radiohead, Jeff Buckley, The Smiths...) but am actually drifting away more and more from it and try to discover other things such as jazz, classical music, world music, etc. I also never ever was into pop, but I discovered Kate Bush at the beginning of the year and she quickly became one of my favourite artists. I guess that the common point between all of my the artists I listen to is that they sound different from everyone else and are very sensitive people who are masters at expressing it.
Apart from that, I like history, psychology, economics, politics of course... Everything that has to do with society and people, basically haha!
About my personality, I find it hard to describe it because it's never something that I've ever wanted to ponder about. What differentiates me most from others and, therefore, would probably be the most relevant thing to define me, is probably the importance that I attach to living a righteous life. André Malraux, former French Minister of Culture, once said: "Man becomes man only by the pursuit of the highest that is in in him", that is to say what makes us different from animals; our ability to pursue noble things such as honor, culture and charity. Quite the contrary from the hedonistic and individualistic lifestyle that seems to characterise most people nowadays. My goals in life are therefore to be as honorable, cultivated and good to others as I can.
More formally, for those who are interested in those things, my MBTI is INFJ and my enneagram 1w9.
I guess that it's all for my presentation! I hope that I was able to arouse your interest and that you'll send me a message so that we can send wonderful letters to each other!
Have a nice day,
Victor

I commented on two videos on TikTok, both with completely different subjects. The first video I commented on was in response to the age-old adage of when people say "go back to your country" (clarifying that the video's poster didn't actually say this, they used a trending sound on the app to make a joke about people who do actually say this). My comment was "okay, so are you going to pay for my flight there + other expenses?" My comment did numbers and many people agreed with me/thought it was funny. But then there was one person who replied to me and accused me of being broke (twice actually; I didn't realize it during our spat because they were bombarding me with replies) and not being able to afford a plane ticket. Like what did that have to do with my initial comment? We went back and forth and they continued to call me names. They took to calling me inebriated and saying that they couldn't understand my replies to them (despite me being fluent in English, as well as them continuing to respond to me in English like they understood me), said that I was dense, claimed I have no one at home who loves me, and that they feel bad for any guy that I'm seeing (which I'm not, and that a disgusting thing to tell someone).
The second video I'm referencing is from another TikTok creator who made a video about the current state of voting in the US and the overarching concern of voting third party and voting for the "lesser of two evils". Someone in their replies said that in the midst of the vapid political jargon, it's better if people don't vote. Their solution to a broken system is to stop voting during presidential elections. I replied and said that it's an asinine privilege to tell people that they shouldn't vote, and voting in presidential elections does create positive changes. They seriously went on to say that that's incorrect and that you don't see positive changes on the presidential level; they believe you only see those changes on state levels. Their responses to me then spiraled into saying that they hope I see the results I want for supporting fascist leaders (which I never once said I did), and that hopefully one day, I'll be more mature with my political views (I didn't realize it was immature to tell someone that not voting doesn't yield positive results).
I feel like I'm at my limit partaking in the use of social media. Both of the above incidents happened back-to-back; I was seriously called inebriated, dense, unlovable, and immature all within the same hour, on the same day, by different people, and did nothing to warrant being called any of those things. When did people...become like this? Why does it feel like people are ready to explode at the drop of a hat? Having any sort of meaningful (or even meaningless) conversation with anyone online now feels like the equivalent of the "I like pancakes." "So you hate waffles?" meme times 1000. I haven't had any friends since I graduated high school, and the only person I get day-to-day conversation out of is my mom, who judges and belittles me every time I come to her about problems with being harassed on the internet; ergo, I have no one to vent my frustrations to. This feels like another push to the feeling I've had for over a year now to get rid of social media and fully invest my self in the dumbphone/digital minimalism lifestyle, especially given that it's been several years since my mental health was 100%. Maybe it's the naivety talking, but social media felt more fun when I first joined in middle school. Granted, a very small amount of the negative comments I've received online I've also received in real life; but the difference is that I couldn't escape those comments in real life; the internet and social media were my escape and form of entertainment. Now, no matter what area of the internet, no matter what social media app I use, I can't escape this type of behavior, and I hate it. These two instances aren't even the only times when I've been spoken terribly to online, I've been told worse for even less grandiose reasons. I genuinely can't do this anymore. I'm drained.

I - II - III
“Please. You have to remove Jumpy from the end of the episode.”
My animation supervisor looked at me with furrowed brows. “ We can't. We've already passed that sequence over.”
“Well then un-pass it. Just tell the client there was a technical error or something. We need to remove Jumpy from the background.”
He frowned at me and drank his coffee. A few people peered into the window of the meeting room, wondering why I was having another one-on-one with my boss.
“Elizabeth, it was you who wanted to add Jumpy in the first—”
“—I know! It was a terrible mistake. We should have never added him in. Please.”
He massaged his temple. “Why does it matter exactly? It's just a webcomic right?”
My hands were fidgeting, wringing each other constantly. I tried to keep my voice level.
“... If we don't remove Jumpy, we are risking the well-being of countless generations of kids who watch this TV show. Lives are at stake.”
He put down the coffee cup and looked me in the eye. “Elizabeth, I know you had that elevator accident. And if you’re feeling … untethered … that’s okay.”
“I'm feeling totally fine. This has nothing to do with the elevator. Please just believe me when I say we need to remove that cartoon frog.”
He took a deep inhale and shook his head. “My hands are tied here Elizabeth. But if you want to talk to production, see if they are willing to communicate with the client for us to resubmit the animation sequence. Go right ahead.”
***
I spoke with production. I spoke with the head producer at our studio and explained how important it was to remove the frog from the background of episode six.
Everyone gave me strange looks and didn’t see the big deal, but I kept pushing.
Eventually, even the head producer said there was nothing that could be done.
The only person who had the power to make changes to episode six, was the client side boss. A wealthy studio exec who worked from home, some two hours away from my city.
His name was Paul Winslow.
I tried calling him, emailing him, messaging him via linkedin, slack and every other platform imaginable. But he was some big shot, and didn't have time to respond to anything.
I had given him three whole days. Three whole days where all I did was worry about my cousin’s nephews, and all the kids I could see going to the school across from my apartment.
This wasn't up to him anymore, It was up to me.
***
HR said I was required to take a ‘ leave of absence’ for 2 weeks as they ‘ reassessed’ something. This was fine with me, because It gave me the time I needed to execute my plan.
On a dark, overcast night I drove all the way to Paul Winslow's house.
***
It was late, but I could still make out the black, wrought iron gates at the entrance. The intercom box on the right.
I had waited too long, the episode was going to release imminently, so I didn't have time to bother with the intercom. Instead, I flashed my high beams and pointed at the gate.
In view of my headlights, the iron gate started to shake and bend.
The middle latch snapped off.
Within seconds, the gate had been peeled apart as if it were made of putty.
I drove through.
Along the path, two large dogs came barking at my car, they looked eager to leap at my throat.
But before they could reach my bumper, there came a large, earth-shaking stomp. The dogs froze. Noses sniffed the air.
Their tails curled between their legs as they ran away.
I pulled up to the enormous front doors made of some kind of red cedar. The handles looked like they were made of polished bronze, or maybe even gold.
The expensive handles crumpled. The doors were torn from their hinges.
I walked in holding a laminated copy of my Jumpy sketch. I spoke loudly and assertively.
“Mr. Winslow. We need to talk.”
From upstairs, I could hear a panicked voice: “Who are you!? Get out of my house! I have a gun!”
Wasting no time, I pointed at the stairs. The bannister bent and splintered.
I waited at the foot of the stairs until I heard a gunshot, followed by shrieks.
“What the hell? What is happening?!”
Some banging and screaming ensued. When it turned into crying, I walked up the stairs.
Mr. Winslow was lying in a bathrobe on his hallway floor. I could make out the wet indentation of a heavy footprint on his chest. He looked up at me with watery, frightened eyes.
“Paul, believe me when I say I’m sorry I had to do this. But I had no other choice.” I said.
He whimpered as he spoke. “Is it money you want? I have gold in the attic. take as much as you want.”
“Lives are at stake. I need you to remove this character from the kids show you're making.” I held up the Jumpy sketch to his face.
“ …What?”
“You have the ultimate sign off. I need you to prevent episode six from airing.”
“You’re talking about … that singalong show?”
“YES! You have to prevent this character from ever being seen by anyone!”
“But it's already … It's already been sent to the streamers.”
“What!? What do you mean it's already been sent?”
“They’ve already released it in … Asia and Europe.”
I dropped the picture, and lowered my face to his. ‘Are you serious? Kids have already seen it!?”
Mr. Winslow's face was beginning to turn blue. “Listen. Do you have any idea how tight the turnaround is on children’s programming? I don't make the rules.”
“No no no!” I pulled at my hair.How could I be too late?
I stared at the air above the studio exec and pointed wildly. “Jumpy, is that true? Is there something you're not telling me? Have some kids seen you?”
The air slowly rippled into green, white and orange patterns, until all the colors solidified into the shape of a massive tree frog.
I looked at one of the frog’s massive red eyes. “Do you have other believers? Can you sense them already?”
Jumpy frowned, holding one hand on its stomach. “Only thing that Jumpy can sense. Is how hungry belly is.”
The frog eyed Mr. Winslow.
“No Jumpy!” I shouted. “We agreed, only as an absolute necessity.”
“Holy fuck!” Mr Winslow tried his best to wriggle out of Jumpy’s foot. “What is this thing? Is this real!?”
Jumpy lifted its foot. The man rolled out and crawled away.
“Jumpy!” I waved my arms. “What are you doing?!”
Mr. Winslow ran for the pistol lying on the floor at the end of the hall. Just as his fingers leaned down, A massive tongue whipped out and grabbed him by the head.
There was a crack and a twist.
Mr. Winslow's body lay face down on the floor. His shocked face was turned upwards, staring wide-mouthed at the ceiling.
“Now can I eat him?” Jumpy asked.
***
The following day I left town. Paul Winslow's sudden disappearance would eventually be traced back to me. Everyone at my work knew what I was after.
I had been obvious about it.
I had been stupid.
Terror prevented me from seeking Jumpy, but now survival has forced me to pair with the frog. It followed me wherever I drove.
Ironically, I was no longer afraid of the monster which used to keep me up at night, because I had turned into somewhat of a monster myself. A murderer on the run.
The silver lining was that when I finally got around to watching episode six of my company's kids show. You couldn't see Jumpy.
It was a sing-along show for young kids, and the baked-in lyrics on screen obscured the background characters for the whole sequence Jumpy was in. You couldn't even make out it was a frog.
And so here I am, driving from city to city. Never lingering too long.
I'm giving myself a few months to figure out what to do. I’ve mostly been staying in cheap hotels and hostels.
Every now and then I go swimming at the nearest public pool late at night. Jumpy always finds a way through the roof. We swim together.
Through Jumpy I’ve been learning more about my late twin sisters. They used the Jumpy a lot to get what they wanted.
But I don't need anything excessive. I don't want money, I don't want fame, I just want to live somewhere peacefully. Maybe teach synchronized swimming. If I can use Jumpy to arrange that—it's enough for me.
As much as I hate it, I feel like I deserve to be the sole believer. To have this invisible creature haunt me, and follow me wherever I go.
I was a Whitaker sister after all.
Jumpy is my imaginary friend.

He would beyond broken. Honestly I’m surprised Yuta isn’t absolutely broken with that considering he has the ce to heal his throat if it’s ever crushed. Inumaki with a domain or even a cursed technique reversal would be such a crazy cool concept, kinda disappointed Gege never did enough with him or his cursed technique, maybe he didn’t want to bother so he had Inumaki lose his arm but curious if he had rct and lost a limb would just commanding himself to heal make it heal faster? Would he be able to speak full sentences in his domain? As for cursed technique reversal no idea how it’d work but cursed silence would be such a cool name.

West Virginia has a tonnnnn of good music that fits the theme of the game.
Personally, I am kinda sad She Said by Hasil Adkins isn't in the mix.
Qualities:

• Hasil Adkins is a West Virginian
• it's got some nice raider vibes while still fitting with the overall song feeling
• its about an ugly ghoul
• it feels like a funny version of a ghoul attack

Close second is Phantom 309 by Red Sovine. Phantom 309 is gonna be the new name of my Power Armor.

So I guess it started with a woman named, well let's just call her "A" and then a man named "B." A and B had a kid, which was my sister. Treated her like crap, had 2 other kids, shot them. Then after 5 years they divorce, A takes my sister, and goes to live with my dad.
So here we have my mom (A) and my dad. I'm born and my mom is pretty abusive to my sister. Constant physical abuse. Soon enough my dad begins to realize (after like a week) that this woman is a drug addict. Then my mom threatens to kill his family if he divorces her. During the time me and my sister are together, my sister is being abused, and IM not because my dad can actually do something if she hurts me. (He doesn't have custody over my sister) I'm left alone, watching my sister get hurt, clueless of what is going on. I won't explain in detail, but I saw some crazy stuff happen.
Something that still bothers me to this day is what we call the "coffee table incident." My sister spilt HOT coffee on me and my mom... ok the glass table broke and my sister's head was bleeding if that sums things up.
at like 4 in the morning there was screaming and crying because my mom bit my dad and started laughing like a damn maniac and I was just watching and crying because it finally came to me what the hell my mom really was and my sister was unfazed by the scene because she's used to it. (She still she'd like a few tears but I was just sobbing and just absolutely miserable in this moment) My life just shattered before my eyes it felt like because I never actually knew about this. My whole life felt perfect but the realization hit hard.
Back to the story, my dad called the police and my mom dragged me and my sister in her room and held us in front of her holding us close saying "I love you 2 so much please please don't leave me." And of course I thought it was real. I even felt bad and shed tears for her. Then the police came and held a gun up to her and she held us tighter so we couldn't move and kept telling us she loved us acting like she was just hugging us and NOT USING US AS A SHIELD? Ugh.
I guess I feel selfish for complaining about not having the "ideal" family and also that I wasn't able to do anything to help my sister.
Also, my sister grew up to be a drug addict and a lazy bum who does cosmetology and never went to college until she was forced to by my dads side of the family. I just feel bad because my sister went through so much and even if I went through mental abuse by my mom and got used as a human shield when my mom was being arrested, my sister went through so much more than me and I still complain about my life. I know I have my whole life ahead of me but still.
Oh yea something funny: my mom got bailed out not that long ago and now she lives in Florida and is constantly calling me and my sister like "hi little one who isn't so little hehe I love you 2 so very much!" and then goes on to say "violence is never the answer" 😐

Date: 06/04/2024

Reading time: 10 minutes, 2112 words

🪖 Military

Armenia, Serbia to sign defense cooperation agreement

Defense Minister Suren Papikyan met with Serbia’s ambassador to the country Tatjana Panajotović Cvetković. Meeting touched upon defense cooperation between the two countries. The parties also agreed to design an Armenia-Serbia defense cooperation agreement.

ArkaAm, Armenian DM, Serbian Ambassador discuss bilateral defense cooperation

"They said: the war is ending, go and occupy the territory of Nagorno-Karabakh." session on the case of the training battalion

The trial in this case is proceeding in the court of first instance. Only Ishkhan Vahanyan is in the defendant's seat, because he left his position during the battle. The 5th rifle battalion of the Jrakan military unit was moved to a precinct called "Chrikan" ; on October 4, it retreated from that precinct to Hadrut.

CivilNet

🏛️ Politics & Government

Switzerland deploys specialists from Swiss Humanitarian Aid Unit to areas affected by flooding

Flooding caused by heavy rainfall has led to considerable loss of life and destruction of property in several areas of northern Armenia. More than 400 people have had to be evacuated and a wide range of infrastructure has been damaged or destroyed, including roads, bridges and gas and water pipes. Switzerland has earmarked up to CHF 500,000 to support efforts on the ground.

Armenpress, Switzerland deploys specialists to flood-affected areas in Armenia

U.S., Turkey emphasize importance of Armenia-Azerbaijan peace deal

Jake Sullivan and Akif Cagatay Kilic have discussed the normalization process between Armenia and Azerbaijan.

PanArmenian

Mirzoyan, Siebert address Armenia-EU relations and regional security

Armenian Foreign Minister Ararat Mirzoyan received Michael Siebert, Managing Director of Russia, Eastern Europe, Central Asia, OSCE at the European External Action Service. The interlocutors discussed a number of issues of the comprehensive and ambitious agenda of the Armenia-EU partnership.

Armenpress, Ruben Rubinyan and Michael Siebert discussed regional security issues, Pashinyan and the President of Finland hold a telephone conversation, The Prime Minister received Michael Siebert, Pashinyan says there is need to develop economic and technological ties with EU, Ambitious agenda of Armenia-EU partnership discussed in Yerevan, Armenian PM, Finnish President discuss bilateral relations, regional issues

Armenia responds to Azerbaijan's latest proposals regarding draft peace treaty - Foreign Ministry

Armenia has responded to Azerbaijan's latest proposals regarding draft peace treaty. Armenia has sent the updated 9th edition of the draft treaty to Azerbaijan. Armenia's Foreign Ministry Spokesperson Ani Badalyan said on

Armenpress, Yerevan sends Baku amended 9th revision oа draft peace treaty - Foreign Ministry

Armenian delegation in the Slovenian Parliament reaffirms commitment to establishing peace in the region

Armenian delegation led by National Assembly Speaker Alen Simonyan met Slovenia-Armenia Friendship Group. Meeting was attended by the Chair of the Standing Committee on Foreign Relations of the National Assembly Sargis Khandanyan, and member of the Armenia-Slovenia friendship group Lena Nazaryan.

Armenpress

Armenia counts on Georgia’s support in joining the Black Sea Cable project: Deputy Foreign Minister

Deputy Minister of Foreign Affairs Vahan Kostanyan: Intensive work has been done to raise relations between Armenia and Georgia to the level of strategic partnership. He said on January 26 of the current year, the Prime Ministers of the two states signed the relevant declaration. The Black Sea Cable project is very important for Armenia, in which Georgia is involved.

Armenpress

Positive progress expected in EU visa liberalization for Armenian citizens - Paruyr Hovhannisyan

Deputy Minister of Foreign Affairs of Armenia Paruyr Hovhannisyan said there will be positive changes in the issue of EU visas for citizens of Armenia. He said the field of legal agreements with the European Union is expanding.

Armenpress

Armenian Deputy Prime Minister announces disagreements in EEU over energy markets

Armenia's Deputy Prime Minister Mher Grigoryan spoke at the Eurasian Intergovernmental Council in Nesvizh, Belarus. He said economic indicators of EEU are increasing, but it is necessary to make qualitative changes like trade. The most important factor in the development of the EEU is the formation of common energy markets, he said.

Armenpress, Armenia’s Deputy PM: Quality changes needed to form common energy markets in EEU, Armenia ready to make efforts to ensure food security of EEU - Deputy Prime Minister

The demarcation process should be based only on documents with an impregnable legal basis - Mirzoyan

The process of border demarcation between Armenia and Azerbaijan should be based only on documents with an impregnable legal basis, how happened in the already demarcated part of Tavush. Minister of Foreign Affairs of Armenia Ararat Mirzoyan made comments at NA Standing Committees.

Armenpress

Constitutional changes not on Armenia-Azerbaijan negotiation agenda-Mirzoyan

Both Armenia and Azerbaijan see each other’s Constitutions some obstacles to establishing long-term peace. The issue of changing them is not on the agenda of the Armenian-Azerbaijani negotiations, says the Foreign Minister.

Armenpress

The signing of the peace treaty between Armenia and Azerbaijan will end the long-standing conflict. Biden

The United States is interested in ensuring stability in the South Caucasus, says the Azerbaijani APA agency. This was stated in the message of US President Joe Biden to the participants of the international energy exhibition in Baku. On April 26, Azerbaijan forwarded to Armenia the 9th edition of the proposals on the draft peace treaty.

CivilNet

Armenian cognac to be re-branded into Armenian brandy - head of Economy Ministry

Armenian cognac will be re-branded into Armenian brandy, Economy Minister Gevorg Papoyan said at a joint session of the parliamentary committees on European integration and on financia and budgetary issues on Tuesday. The EU was informed about the new name during the 5th session of Armenia-EU partnership trade commission held on 17 October 2023.

ArkaAm

Armenian Foreign Minister describesdialogue with Turkey as ‘very healthy’

Ararat Mirzoyan described the dialogue with Turkey as ‘very healthy’ There are no diplomatic relations between Armenia and Turkey and the state border has been closed since 1993 by decision of Ankara. In December 2021, Armenian and Turkey appointed their emissaries to normalise relations.

ArkaAm, Mirzoyan: There is a very healthy dialogue in Armenia-Turkey relations

Iran was among the first to welcome Armenia's "Crossroads of Peace" project - Deputy FM

Iran and the U.S. are working together on a joint project to build a bridge between the two countries. The two countries are involved in the construction of a bridge in Iran's capital Tehran.

Armenpress

Armenian Foreign Ministry pursues opening new embassy buildings in Paris and Tehran

Deputy Minister of Foreign Affairs Paruyr Hovhannisyan says Armenia continues efforts to acquire new buildings for embassies. "Last year, an example of this was the new building of our embassy in the United Kingdom. Indeed, the conditions were miserable and not suitable for working," he said.

Armenpress

The present times call for great and sustained contributions from everyone- India’s Prime Minister publishes article

Prime Minister of India Narendra Modi has published an article titled “New Sankalps from the Sadhana in Kanniyakumari” Narendra Modi: ‘My fellow Indians, the biggest festival of democracy, the 2024 Lok Sabha Elections, are concluding today in our nation, the Mother of Democracy’

Armenpress

Pashinyan sent a condolence message to Putin over Artur Chilingarov's Passing

Nikol Pashinyan sent a condolence message to the President of the Russian Federation, Vladimir Putin, in connection with the death of the prominent explorer of the Arctic and Antarctica Artur Chilingarov.

Armenpress

Criminal prosecution was initiated against 5 participants of the protest at the Foreign Ministry

Criminal prosecution initiated against 5 people for allegedly committing hooliganism. On May 31, during the protest action of the "Tavush for the Motherland movement in front of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.

CivilNet

Reverend Bagrat was with his supporters in front of the HRD office, but it was not possible to meet the defender

Saint Bagrat, leader of the Tavush for the Motherland movement, was in front of the Human Rights Defender's office with his supporters. HRD public relations department said that the HRD is ready to receive Bagrat Reverend and four other people without media presence.

CivilNet

Police Misconduct Against Opposition MPs

Opposition deputy Ashot Simonyan was physically and verbally assaulted last week by riot police in an incident involving over a dozen officers. While one officer was fired, no criminal charges have been brought against him or any other officers involved in the assault. The exiled mayors of Stepanakert, Askeran, and Martakert in Nagorno-Karabakh were arrested and charged with fraud and forgery.

CivilNet

Man detained on suspicion of smuggling large batch of diamonds at Zvartnots

Armenia’s customs officers prevented a large batch of diamonds from being smuggled into the country. A total of 29 undeclared valuable stones, suspectedly diamonds, were found in his luggage and his wallet. The individual was detained by the anti-smuggling department of the State Revenue Committee.

ArkaAm, They tried to illegally import 29 diamond-like stones on the Sharjah-Yerevan flight. there is an arrest (VIDEO)

Train traffic restored on two out of eight damaged sections of the Armenian railway infrastructure

Train traffic has been restored on two out of eight damaged sections of the railway infrastructure from Sanahin station to Hayrum station, following a devastating flooding on the morning of 26 May. The flooding killed 4 people and caused extensive damage to areas in Tavush and Lori provinces, the South Caucasus Railway said.

ArkaAm

💵 Economy

Some EU countries signal increased investments in Armenia - Minister of Economy

There are signals from some European Union countries about increasing investments in Armenia, Gevorg Papoyan said. French companies are already in Armenia and are looking for possible areas to invest in, he said. There are also problems related not to the EU-Armenia agenda but to EU-EEU agenda.

Armenpress

Ministry of Economy develops new export strategy

The Ministry of Economy has developed an export strategy, said Minister of Economy GevorgPapoyan. The Middle East, China, the European Union, the USA, Russia and the Middle East have been identified.

Armenpress

🧪 Science & Technology

Azerbaijani scientist pushed back a famous historical event by 300 years, falsifying history – “Geghard” SAF

“Azerbaijan’s” claim is a distortion of history. “There is no need to argue that the state created by Atropates in the fourth century BC cannot have anything to do with the modern state of Azerbaijan,” the claim says.

Armenpress

OVIO Presents Data Center Cyber Security Solutions at CyberGEN 2024 Conference

OVIO telecom sponsored the CyberGEN 2024 conference held in Dilijan, Armenia. CyberGEN is the largest event in Armenia in terms of the number of participants. The conference featured speakers from renowned organizations such as Trellix, AWS, SimSpace, OpenText Cybersecurity, Google Cloud, CQURE, Kaspersky, F5.

ArkaAm, OVIO presented cybersecurity solutions of Armenia's most powerful Data Processing Center at the "CyberGEN 2024" conference

Two of the eight sections of railway destroyed in Armenia floods restored

Traffic has been restored in two of the eight damaged sections of the railway infrastructure from Sanahin station to Ayrum station. Cleaning of the collapsed section of the Alaverdi-Haghpat road is being carried out by blasting and dismantling the destroyed structures.

ArmRadio

🎭 Culture

500-year-old Armenian church in Diyarbekir to be renovated

The 500-year-old Surp Sarkis Armenian Church in Diyarbekir will soon undergo major renovations. The renovation project, approved and funded by the Turkish Culture and Tourism Ministry, aims to revive the church and will officially begin this month.

ArmRadio

⚽ Sport

Slovenia-Armenia: the national team had final training before the friendly match

Armenia will play Slovenia in a friendly match in Ljubljana, the capital of Slovenia, on June 4. The match will take place at 20:00 Yerevan time. The national team will play another friendly match on June 7, hosting Kazakhstan.

Armenpress, Armenia coach expects good football in Slovenia friendly

Donations to Armenia:

Himnadram
ServicemenFund
Armenian Wounded Heroes
ArmeniaFund

Part One Here!
Part Two Here!
Part Three Here!
Part Four Here!
Part Five Here!
Part Six Here!
Part Seven Here!
Part Eight Here!
Part Nine Here!
Part Ten Here!
Part Eleven Here!
We pick up in the new year of 2013, with John Cena making one more challenge to CM Punk’s throne at the Royal Rumble. After having spent 2012 failing to make headway against the Best in the World, this is his chance to finally overcome perhaps his greatest rival - as long as nothing else gets in the way this time. Cena talks about Punk’s history, even alluding to the history he had with Samoa Joe in TNA as a comparison - every step of the way, Punk has given him trouble and had his number, and this is Cena’s last chance to not only win a fifth World Title in WWE, but to make up for every failure and prove that nobody can ever keep him down for good.
Royal Rumble 2013
WWE Title; If Cena Doesn’t Win, He Can’t Challenge Punk Again: John Cena vs. CM Punk (c)
It’s Day 434 of CM Punk’s legendary WWE Championship reign, and since WrestleMania XXVIII, he’s held the gold as a tyrant. Much like at Night of Champions, Cena digs deep into the bag of tricks early, pulling out a lariat which very nearly earns three in the early going before tapping into his excursion in NOAH, pulling out a Tiger Suplex for a nearfall. Punk turns the tides with a well-timed thumb to the eye, following it with a high knee and bulldog combo that sends Cena reeling to the apron… BEFORE PUNK SLINGSHOTS OVER THE TOP ROPE FOR A DDT ONTO THE APRON, BOTH MEN CRASHING TO THE FLOOR! Punk hurls Cena into the steps, kicking his head into the steel before attempting a GO TO SLEEP IN THE RING, BUT CENA CATCHES THE KNEE TO REVERSE IT INTO AN STF! HE’S GOT IT IN DEEP, THE SAME MOVE THAT WON HIM THE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE FROM CHRIS JERICHO, THE SAME MOVE THAT WOULD’VE BEATEN PUNK AT WRESTLEMANIA… BUT PUNK MAKES IT TO THE ROPES, ONLY FOR CENA TO DRAG HIM BACK, BUT THE CHAMP LANDS AN UPKICK TO THE EYE! Cena stumbles backwards, and Punk uncorks an IMMENSE SHINING WIZARD! ONE! TWO! THR-NOOO! He picks Cena up, taunting the challenger as he goes for a GO TO SLEEP, BUT CENA OFF THE SHOULDERS, NAILING A HURRICANRANA! PUNK DOESN’T KNOW WHERE HE IS, STUNNED, AND HE FALLS INTO AN ATITTUDE ADJUSTMENT! CENA ROLLS THROUGH, NAILING ANOTHER BEFORE HOOKING BOTH LEGS… ONE! TWO! THREE! JOHN CENA’S THE WWE CHAMPION ONCE MORE, HAVING VANQUISHED THE DEMON THAT’S HAUNTED HIS WWE TENURE!
John Cena def. CM Punk (30:37) to win the WWE Title
However, the night isn’t over for Cena, who posts up backstage to watch the Royal Rumble match taking place in the main event. Asked who he could see winning, he discusses Ryback, Daniel Bryan, Sheamus, last year’s runner-up in Randy Orton, the man who cashed in on him in Dolph Ziggler, or even a member of the Shield. After all, the field is something else this year, but he’s ready for anyone… or so he thinks, because he can’t anticipate Entrant Number 30 - Samoa Joe. Cena’s been champion for about an hour, having beaten the guy who had his number in WWE, and now he’s faced with the man who had his number in TNA. Commentary puts Joe over as having wins over the current champ, and, after a dominant performance, Samoa Joe makes history by winning the Royal Rumble in his debut, last eliminating Ryback with a Coquina Clutch hung over the ropes.
Road to Elimination Chamber 2013
Now holding the WWE Title for a fourth time, Cena’s certainly feeling the target on his back. He’s concerned about Samoa Joe at WrestleMania, and he’s virtually certain Joe will choose to face him, but first he has to get through the Elimination Chamber, where it’s announced he’ll defend the gold. CM Punk naturally gets a spot as well, and having beaten Cena in last year’s Chamber, he’s confident. The lineup fills out over the next few weeks, with Ryback, Chris Jericho, Daniel Bryan and Sheamus qualifying for the match, making for a difficult walk down memory lane for Cena against some of his most daunting opponents of his WWE tenure.
Elimination Chamber 2013
Before the main event, Samoa Joe has his first singles bout in WWE, picking up a big win over Randy Orton to strike some fear into Cena’s heart.
Elimination Chamber Match for the WWE Title: John Cena (c) vs. Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Ryback vs. Sheamus
Without Laurinaitis to intervene, Cena doesn’t start off the Chamber this year, instead beginning in a pod and watching CM Punk and Daniel Bryan go at it. Bryan gets some big spots in to showcase his growth and babyface transformation, but Punk has the upper hand as Jericho enters at Number 3, turning it into a frantic, fast-paced affair as everyone tries to keep themselves from taking any major damage, while also looking to notch early eliminations. Cena’s in at Number 4, and the champ goes on a tear, making a beeline for Punk before managing to put away Chris Jericho with an Attitude Adjustment. Number 5 is Sheamus, and he and Cena get into a big, beefy slugfest out on the steel grating while Bryan and Punk go for technical eliminations in the ring. Soon enough, Ryback is in at Number 6, leveling the competition with a series of Meat Hook Clotheslines before going for a Shell Shocked on Sheamus, only for Sheamus to slide off and nail a BROGUE KICK, RYBACK KNOCKED INTO A SMALL PACKAGE BY PUNK! ONE! TWO! THREE!
Sheamus is comparatively freshest, and takes control with sheer power, muscling the competition around and delivering a White Noise off the middle rope to Cena for a nearfall, the champ staying alive and rolling to the outside. Punk tries to avoid confrontation, but when push comes to shove, he nails a head kick on Sheamus, leaving him prone for a MISSILE DROPKICK FROM BRYAN, FOLLOWED BY A GO TO SLEEP! ONE! TWO! THREE! Punk goes straight for Bryan with a Shining Wizard, but Daniel ducks and starts throwing roundhouses to the body, Cena entering the ring and getting clobbered as well as the crowd gets louder and louder, “YES” chants echoing as Daniel Bryan somehow keeps CM Punk and John Cena at bay by himself, capping it with two head kicks. He goes for the Yes Lock on Punk, but Punk manages to crawl under the ropes to avoid being able to submit, ONLY FOR BRYAN TO TRY AND LOCK IT IN THROUGH THE CHAIN LINK, BUT PUNK SMASHES HIS HEAD INTO THE CHAINS! He throws Bryan back into the ring, Cena popping him up into an ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT, BUT BRYAN LANDS ON HIS FEET! HEAD KICK TO CENA, BUT PUNK FROM BEHIND WITH A KNEE! GO TO SLEEP! ONE! TWO! THREE! IT’S JUST PUNK AND CENA NOW!
The excitement is palpable as Cena and Punk struggle to their feet, Cena the fresher of the two, but still having had his bell rung by Bryan a moment ago. Punk quickly goes for a rollup, but Cena reverses, going for an ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT, BUT PUNK OFF HIS BACK AND OVER THE ROPES TO THE OUTSIDE! Cena follows him out, Punk trying to close himself in a pod, Cena trying to muscle it open when WAIT A SECOND! SAMOA JOE! HE GOT IN WHILE BRYAN WAS EXITING, AND HE’S GOT JOHN CENA IN THE COQUINA CLUTCH! Cena has no answer for the submission, having been totally preoccupied by Punk, and he quickly fades before Joe drops him to the steel, Punk slipping out of the pod and rolling him into the ring while nervously looking up at Joe… ONE! TWO! THR-JOE BREAKS IT UP, AND NOW DELIVERS A MUSCLE BUSTER TO PUNK! WHAT THE HELL? HE DRAPES AN UNCONSCIOUS CENA OVER PUNK’S BODY… ONE! TWO! THREE! JOHN CENA RETAINS, BUT HE’S NOT EVEN AWAKE TO KNOW HE’S WON AFTER SAMOA JOE LAYS WASTE TO BOTH HIM AND PUNK!
John Cena def. Chris Jericho, CM Punk, Daniel Bryan, Ryback and Sheamus (32:03) to retain the WWE Title
Leaning over the champ, Joe’s got a simple message - he chooses John Cena at WrestleMania.
Road to WrestleMania 29
Naturally, Cena’s disappointed in not winning clean, something CM Punk immediately exploits on Raw, saying that if Cena’s a real fighting champion, he’ll put the belt on the line against him again. After all, John’s history against Samoa Joe is a lot like Punk’s - Punk can’t beat Joe either, so he’ll be giving the WWE Universe the gift of watching The Best in the World finally beat the Samoan Submission Machine by giving Punk a title match. Cena says that if Punk wants a title match… he’s got one, and if he wants his WrestleMania main event, he’s got it, in the form of a triple threat match. Out comes Samoa Joe, saying that he had no trouble laying out both guys at the Chamber, and he’ll have no problem doing so again in New Jersey. The buildup to this one is simple - these three loathe each other, and are all maestros on the microphone, making for some incredible promo battles ahead of their actual match. Cena discusses how much of an insurmountable obstacle Joe’s been for him, but he’s made a career of doing the impossible, and at WrestleMania 29 he intends to walk out STILL the WWE Champion, by never giving up and never giving in against the two toughest foes of his entire career.
WrestleMania 29
WWE Title: John Cena (c) vs. CM Punk vs. Samoa Joe
The 80,676 in attendance at MetLife Stadium are hyped as all hell for a triple threat clash of titans, with over a decade of history tying them all together. The match starts out with a quick homage to Joe’s famous three way dance with AJ Styles and Christopher Daniels, all three jockeying for control before Joe takes the lead, using his size and power to guide the contest. He delivers a thunderous Uranage to Punk, Cena saving the match before going for an ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT, BUT JOE SLIPS OFF INTO A COQUINA CLUTCH, FORCING JOHN TO DIVE OUT OF THE RING TO THE FLOOR FOR A CHAOTIC BREAK! It turns into a huge brawl at ringside, Joe piecing Cena up against the barricade before Cena turns the tides with a huge lariat, bouncing Joe’s head off the ring post and delivering an ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT THROUGH THE ENGLISH ANNOUNCE DESK! He scoops Joe up and lays him out on the Spanish announce desk, pointing to CM Punk, who reluctantly clambers to the top rope… AND DELIVERS AN ELBOW DROP THROUGH SAMOA JOE! Cena picks Punk up and sends him back into the ring, considering going for the cover but instead letting him get up before they engage in a masterful sequence of reversals in what’s essentially a rematch of last year’s WrestleMania. Eventually, Punk gets Cena up for the GTS, but Cena catches the knee to go for the STF, Punk countering with an enziguri before going for a PILEDRIVER, ONLY FOR CENA TO REVERSE IT WITH AN ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT! ONE! TWO! THRE-JOE BREAKS IT UP! HE’S INHUMAN! HE HOISTS CENA UP… MUSCLE BUSTER! ONE! TWO! THREE! SAMOA JOE JUST PINNED JOHN CENA TO WIN THE WWE CHAMPIONSHIP IN HIS FIRST WRESTLEMANIA MATCH!
Samoa Joe def. John Cena and CM Punk (25:48) to win the WWE Title
Road to Extreme Rules 2013
Raw kicks off with the Samoan Submission Machine celebrating his huge win, successfully felling two career rivals to win the grandest prize in the sport on the biggest stage imaginable. However, his celebration is quickly cut off by Cena, and while John acknowledges his defeat and says he respects Joe as champion, it doesn’t take long until a particularly vicious Joe barb sparks things off, and a huge brawl breaks out between the two. Cena says he wants his rematch for the WWE Title, and Joe says he’ll leave Cena laying on the mat, looking up at the lights like he was in New Jersey, while Joe stands tall, still the champion. John tells him to put his money where his mouth is, saying that they might as well go big - a Last Man Standing match, befitting the feud’s spectacle. Joe accepts, and over the next few weeks, he chokes his opponents out and continues to win by a referee’s down count, none of his foes able to get up before ten.
Extreme Rules 2013
Last Man Standing Match for the WWE Title: John Cena vs. Samoa Joe (c)
It’s Cena’s first Last Man Standing bout in WWE, but he walks into this one balancing his fear of falling short once more with his confidence that he can figure something out that he wouldn’t be able to in a normal match. However, he’s determined to beat Joe outright and cleanly, something Joe makes very difficult in the opening stages by delivering a SUICIDE DIVE, FOLLOWED BY A URANAGE ACROSS THE BARRIER AND A POWERBOMB THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE, BUT CENA’S UP AT EIGHT! Joe keeps the pressure on, spilling the fight into the crowd, where Cena starts rallying back with the fans by his side. He lands a flurry of punches in the stairwell, but JOE LANDS A HUGE BOOT TO SEND CENA DOWN THE STAIRS! Joe lines himself up at the top of the stairwell, READY TO LEAP, but he thinks better of it, running down the stairs instead and STRAIGHT INTO AN ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT ON THE CONCRETE! Joe is dazed as the ref starts counting, Cena setting up a few tables as he struggles to get to his feet at eight, and knocks Joe onto them before CLIMBING UP THE STAIRS AND LEAPING DOWN WITH A LEGDROP THROUGH THE TABLES! THE REF IS AT SEVEN AS CENA GETS UP… EIGHT… NINE… JOE GETS TO HIS FEET! WHAT IS IT GOING TO TAKE?
Cena picks Joe up, dragging him through the crowd towards the stage area, but Joe reaches out and grabs a chair from a fan before SMASHING CENA IN THE SPINE WITH IT! John is sent reeling as Joe goes back on the attack, delivering a gnarly senton and GOING FOR A MUSCLE BUSTER ON THE CONCRETE, BUT CENA DROPS DOWN TO GO FOR AN ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT, ONLY FOR JOE TO SLIP BEHIND AND LOCK IN THE COQUINA CLUTCH ON THE STAGE! He keeps it in for a long time, finally releasing the hold and shouting down to ringside to have his title brought over. At six, the gold arrives in his hand, and he lifts it high, standing behind Cena’s limp body as the ref counts… SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE… CENA GETS UP! Cena collapses again, but Joe’s merciless, SLAMMING HIM DOWN WITH AN URANAGE ONTO THE STEEL GRATING ON THE STAGE! He drags Cena over to the edge of the stage, and now tries for a DANGLING COQUINA CLUTCH, BUT CENA WITH AN ELBOW TO THE BODY! He sprawls out towards the LED screen, heading towards the backstage area as Joe makes his pursuit, CHARGING AT CENA WITH A TACKLE THROUGH THE LED SCREEN, A HUGE SEA OF SPARKS AND PYRO ERUPTIONS COMPLETELY OBSCURING BOTH MEN FROM VIEW! The replay shows Joe charging, and, in slow mo, shows Cena simply collapsing from exhaustion before impact, sending Joe through the screen alone as the referee counts both men out… SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN… BUT CENA ROLLED OFF THE STAGE BEFORE COLLAPSING AGAIN, TECHNICALLY REACHING HIS FEET! LUCK FINALLY WENT CENA’S WAY AFTER AN INSANE CAR CRASH OF A MATCH!
John Cena def. Samoa Joe (27:14) to win the WWE Title
Following the bout, a furious Samoa Joe struggles to his feet to hear the announcement that an unmoving Cena was victorious, sending him into a rage that ends with a MUSCLE BUSTER ON THE STAGE! Joe marches away, leaving Cena looking up at the lights for far more than ten seconds as he’s loaded onto a stretcher, the WWE Title draped over his body.
Road to Payback 2013
Having been brutalized by Samoa Joe, John Cena misses the next few weeks of TV - as does Joe, who’s suspended for his actions. However, he vows to be in Chicago to defend his championship, and, on Raw, Randy Orton wins a battle royal to contend for the gold, making for a first time ever singles encounter to headline Payback.
Payback 2013
WWE Title: John Cena (c) vs. Randy Orton
It’s Cena’s first match since Extreme Rules, and Randy Orton is perfectly happy to take advantage of the weakened, slightly rusty champion. Cena’s power is a lot to overcome, but Orton turns the tides in his favour with a draping DDT off the barricade, looking to follow it up with an RKO in the ring but being sent into the ropes and caught with a flying shoulder block. John starts rallying, delivering a second and going for a third before ORTON NAILS A SCOOP SLAM! He calls for the RKO again, Cena catching him and delivering an emphatic German Suplex, followed by a HUGE LARIAT THAT TURNS ORTON INSIDE OUT! ONE! TWO! THRE-NOOO! Cena calls for the Attitude Adjustment, Orton scrambling towards the ropes, but Cena pulls him away for an ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT, COUNTERED IN MID-AIR INTO AN RKO! BOTH MEN’S FINISHERS CONNECT, CENA LANDING ATOP ORTON… ONE! TWO! THREE! CENA RETAINS BY A HAIR!
John Cena def. Randy Orton (20:02) to retain the WWE Title
Road to Money in the Bank 2013
While it might not have been an easy win, or a distant one, Cena’s just happy to get back on the scoreboard properly, and he’s in his element over the next few weeks as he checks out various members of the roster, scoping their abilities. Daniel Bryan picks up a big win over Randy Orton in a street fight, the crowd rallying behind him, but he’s confirmed for the Money in the Bank ladder match, as is Orton himself, and a returning Samoa Joe. However, Cena doesn’t need to wait long to find a challenger, helping to commemorate a long career for Mark Henry before the salmon suit clad giant delivers a World’s Strongest Slam, declaring that he’s got a lot left in the tank, and wants Cena at Money in the Bank. Still beat up from his match with Samoa Joe and the cumulative injuries of his six World Title reigns in WWE over the past two and a half years, Cena accepts, but he’s weary of how much damage the World’s Strongest Slam managed to do.
Money in the Bank 2013
WWE Title: John Cena (c) vs. Mark Henry
This one is a real uphill battle for the champion, who fights with all his might against Henry’s insurmountable power and size. The challenger manhandles Cena, hurling him around the ring and even delivering a World’s Strongest Slam for a nearfall, but John manages to hang on, reversing a second World’s Strongest Slam into an INSIDE CRADLE! ONE! TWO! THRE-NOOO! CENA TRIED TO GET CRAFTY THERE, BUT HE NEEDS TO GO THROUGH HENRY! HE DELIVERS A HUGE LARIAT, HENRY BARELY BUDGING! HE KICKS OUT THE KNEE AND DELIVERS A DDT, CLIMBING UP TO THE TOP ROPE FOR A CROSSBODY, BUT HENRY CATCHES HIM… WORLD’S STRONGEST SLAM AVOIDED, CENA FLOATING OVER! HENRY PIVOTS… CENA’S GOT HIM UP! ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT TO MARK HENRY! ONE! TWO! THREE! A SUPERHUMAN PERFORMANCE FROM BIG MATCH JOHN!
John Cena def. Mark Henry (14:26) to retain the WWE Title
In the main event, Randy Orton wins the Money in the Bank briefcase by dumping Daniel Bryan, all after Paul Heyman turned on CM Punk, and Samoa Joe got put through a ladder with a Five Star Frog Splash by Rob Van Dam.
Road to SummerSlam 2013
Cena comes out of the Money in the Bank pay per view with a lot of great options for challengers at SummerSlam, and he’s told that he’s got his pick of the roster for the main event, as long as Triple H is the guest referee to ensure that management has some swing. He considers CM Punk, and then ponders Samoa Joe, and is about to pick him to conclude the feud before “YES!” chants break out, leading him to pick Daniel Bryan. Bryan appreciates the opportunity, but says that Cena used to be a real wrestler, only to now accept the role of the face of the company and have everything piled on all at once after becoming a parody of the sport. He used to scratch and claw, but now he’s the Franchise, the Champ, the six-time WWE World Champion, and he’s gotten complacent. He forgets what it’s like to not be in the main event. He treats being away from the gold for a few months as an all-time low, not realizing how easy he has it. He got to shoot off from the Nexus and become a World Champion, while Daniel Bryan joined the Nexus and got fired. He’s been seen as a lesser performer his whole run, so Daniel Bryan wants one thing out of Cena at SummerSlam - to bring the years of experience he’s got to the fight. The same Cena who fought in Japan, who worked his way up in the indies, who’s peaked everywhere he’s gone, because THAT’S the John Cena he wants to beat for the WWE Championship.
SummerSlam 2013
WWE Title: John Cena (c) vs. Daniel Bryan
Once again, we’re confronted by an instance of reality being pretty much perfect, because this match was peak wrestling. Cena and Bryan lay into each other after a technical opening exchange, John throwing his big bombs to try and shut the fan favourite down, but Bryan’s tenacity matching Cena’s own. Cena floors Bryan with a lariat, but he kicks out. He locks in the STF, but Bryan escapes and begins a surgical assault on Cena’s left arm, which is already bandaged up. Finally, Cena manages to scoop Bryan up for an ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT, BUT BRYAN REVERSES INTO A POISON RANA BEFORE CINCHING IN THE YES LOCK! HE’S RIPPING CENA’S ARM APART, BUT CENA SOMEHOW GETS TO THE ROPES, ONLY FOR BRYAN TO KICK HIM SQUARE IN THE TEMPLE! Bryan sends John into the corner to go for his dropkick, but Cena responds with a HELLACIOUS CLOTHESLINE, FOLLOWED BY A TIGER SUPLEX THAT WOULD MAKE MISAWA BLUSH - BUT BRYAN’S BACK UP, SLAPPING CENA IN THE FACE! THEY’RE TRADING SLAPS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING, AND BRYAN’S NOT BACKING DOWN AS HE LAYS INTO THE CHAMPION, FINALLY BRINGING HIM TO HIS KNEES! He grabs Cena’s wrists, kicking him under the jaw before laying in a flurry of stomps to the head, the crowd fervently chanting “YES” with each blow. Finally, he relents, heading to the corner and rallying the chant behind him before CHARGING WITH A KNEE TO THE FACE! ONE! TWO! THREE! DANIEL BRYAN HAS BEATEN JOHN CENA, AND THE GOAT HAS REACHED THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN!
Daniel Bryan def. John Cena (26:55)
Following the match, Bryan celebrates with confetti raining down, only for Randy Orton to hit the scene. Orton stares Bryan down, but Cena steps between them, saying he can’t stand by and let a battered Bryan be taken advantage of. Behind him, Bryan is about to push past, when TRIPLE H DELIVERS A PEDIGREE TO THE NEW CHAMPION! Hearing the noise, Cena pivots, turning his back on the Viper, who NAILS AN RKO, FOLLOWED BY A PUNT TO CENA! He covers Bryan, Triple H insisting the bell be rung before quickly counting three. The Authority has been born.
Road to Hell in a Cell 2013
John Cena’s elbow was a damn mess after his tricep tear, and he ended up missing both Night of Champions and Battleground. However, this gets accounted not to a tricep tear, but Orton’s Punt, giving it that extra bit of juice to make attempts at landing it on Bryan all the more daunting. After a few months of Bryan and Orton duking it out over the WWE Title, Cena’s name is finally brought up… by Alberto Del Rio, who talks about his World Title reign being more dominant than anything Cena had accomplished in WWE. He’s all talk, assuming that Cena’s gone for months to come, but he looks petrified when John Cena answers his call, laying down the gauntlet for a return match at Hell in a Cell with the championship on the line.
Hell in a Cell 2013
World Heavyweight Title: John Cena vs. Alberto Del Rio (c)
John Cena’s insane streak against sex pests continues, steamrolling straight through Del Rio with the Five Moves of Doom. However, he has to put up with Del Rio’s work on his arm, as well as his head, with Cena having been concussed by the Punt. With that, Del Rio attacks the head the same way he did with Dolph Ziggler at Payback, but Cena braves the punishment, finally delivering an emphatic Attitude Adjustment for three and earning a seventh World Championship under the WWE banner.
John Cena def. Alberto Del Rio (17:45) to win the World Heavyweight Title
Road to Survivor Series 2013
Now holding the World Heavyweight Title, John Cena turns his attention back to Randy Orton, who now holds the WWE Title again after defeating Daniel Bryan at Hell in a Cell with the assistance of Shawn Michaels. With the Authority having strengthened their grip over the company in his absence, Triple H says in a promo that he wants the World Heavyweight Title in their grasp too, leading to John Cena coming up with a bright idea - him vs. Orton for both championships in the main event of Survivor Series, with the winner becoming the WWE World Heavyweight Champion… and meaning that if he wins, he’ll have won sixteen career World Championships. Orton agrees to the bout, and promptly directs Kane and The Shield to attack Cena, holding him steady for a PUNT, BUT BRYAN MAKES THE SAVE! The next week on Raw, Bryan and Cena team up against Orton and Kane, notching a win, and then, in the go-home show, fall short alongside Cody Rhodes and Goldust against Orton and the Shield in a blockbuster eight man tag, leaving the Authority standing tall ahead of Survivor Series.
Survivor Series 2013
WWE World Heavyweight Title: John Cena (c, WHC) vs. Randy Orton (c, WWE)
Despite the gravity of the situation, with one man walking out the unified champion and undisputed top dog in the company, this one is mostly personal, and as such is an outright brawl, with no feeling-out stage to speak of. The formula is simple - Cena tries to beat a lesson into Randy Orton, and the Viper strives to land his guaranteed kill shot. Cena gets control early, overwhelming Orton with his surprising amount of vigor, but Orton turns the tides with a SUPERPLEX! He goes after the head with a Garvin Stomp, lining up for THE PUNT, BUT CENA GETS UP JUST IN TIME TO NAIL AN ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT, INTERCEPTING THE WWE CHAMPION! ONE! TWO! THRE-NOOO! Cena nails a few shoulder blocks and goes for the Five Knuckle Shuffle, but Orton kicks him in the crown of the head, following it up with a spectacular dropkick and a draping DDT. He calls for the RKO, Cena catching him and going for a German Suplex, but Orton lands a back elbow, charging INTO ANOTHER ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT, ONLY TO WRITHE FREE AND KICK THE REFEREE! LOW BLOW TO CENA! RKO! He calls for backup with the referee down, and HERE COMES THE SHIELD! They hoist Cena up for a Triple Powerbomb, but WAIT A SECOND! IT’S DANIEL BRYAN AND CM PUNK, RUSHING DOWN TO EVEN THE ODDS! In the confusion, Orton goes for the PUNT, BUT CENA CATCHES THE LEG, REVERSING INTO AN STF! HE’S GOT HIM TRAPPED AS THE REFEREE COMES TO… ORTON TAPS! JOHN CENA IS THE KING OF WWE, THE UNDISPUTED CHAMPION, AND HE HAS BECOME SO BY WINNING A SIXTEENTH CAREER WORLD TITLE!
John Cena def. Randy Orton (23:48) to win the WWE World Heavyweight Title
Road to TLC 2013
While John Cena may be in a festive mood as a now eight-time World Champion in WWE, and as a double title holder, the Authority isn’t, with Triple H releasing the Hounds on the new champ. However, with Bryan and Punk by his side, he’s able to fend them off, with Triple H making it official that he’ll defend the belt against Randy Orton at TLC in the titular stipulation. However, to stack the deck further, he says there will be a battle royal to determine a third competitor in the bout, and he says that The Shield and Kane will all be in it. In the battle royal, The Authority runs rampant, ready to stack the deck in Orton’s favour, but Daniel Bryan comes from below to win the whole thing, stamping his ticket to another date with both Orton and Cena. The next week, Punk, Bryan and Cena unite as an all-star squad against the Shield, but unfortunately come up short against the Hounds of Justice, who promise to still make their presence known at TLC.
TLC 2013
TLC Match for the WWE World Heavyweight Title: John Cena (c) vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton
Having seen technical clinics, dramatic epics and heated brawls take place between these three, this time, it’s a car crash. The Shield get involved early, and so does CM Punk, making for a real scene with all the weapons that are immediately introduced. Everyone goes through tables, everyone gets hit with chairs, everyone looks to climb the ladder, but there’s always someone in the way. Finally, CM Punk is taken out by a triple powerbomb through the announce table, and the Shield are taken out by Cena and Bryan, who bury them under an avalanche of tables, ladders and chairs, only for THE DAMN WYATT FAMILY TO TAKE OUT DANIEL BRYAN! THIS IS BEDLAM! Cena and Orton end up in the ring, duking it out over the gold atop a precarious ladder, and CENA GOES FOR AN ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT OFF THE TOP THROUGH A STACK OF TABLES, ONLY FOR ORTON TO PULL THE GOLD DOWN WITH HIM! THE VIPER STEALS THE VICTORY, WRENCHING THE CHAMPIONSHIPS AWAY FROM JOHN CENA!
Randy Orton def. John Cena and Daniel Bryan (22:59) to win the WWE World Heavyweight Title

I'm copying a scan of a small radius. When I run the copied points, DMIS measures them twice and adds numbers in brackets after the point name. I've been using DMIS for 30 years and have never seen this before. I don't see anything in the code to indicate why this is happening. Anyone got any ideas?
PC_DMIS 2018 R1 - Build #664 (Service pack 9)
https://preview.redd.it/v6o5m61z4m4d1.png?width=700&format=png&auto=webp&s=d06b430a28ed9a1f840d70c17e3f350d2ceb3fc8

About me
Hello there, my name is Coach Chesster(Yes, an obvious Chess reference, which is, by far, my favorite game). I've been playing League of Legends since season one, I've experienced everything from full AP Yi one-shotting my entire team to Tryndamere mains spinning around with a needlessly large rod instead of a sword. You could say I've been there during all the important historical moments of the game. I've been at the top of the ladder in Season 6 (Going between high Diamond and Challenger, based on how much time I've had to invest). I've competed in various tournaments, even being able to win a number of them, before I decided to get myself into coaching.
Coaching
I started the entire coaching thing during season 7 when one of my friends asked if I wanted to help him get out of that Diamond 4 hell. Ever since then, I was having a consistent number of sessions on a weekly basis, with my network of people slowly increasing(One of them actually gave me the idea to advertise on Reddit, which I did eventually accept!) I've coached more than 700 individuals ever since I started and I can proudly say I've had more than 500 sessions this year alone! So, if you are looking for someone who is around for more than 5 days actually add me.
Some of my personal coaching achievements include
Getting a player from Silver 1 to Platinum in just 5 weeks
Getting D2 to Masters in 2 weeks
Bronze 1 to Diamond, yes, this one happened as well, though it took slightly more time
Helping Duo players on NA reach Gold(They were actually stuck in Bronze 2 prior!)
Creating a coach from hard-stuck D2 after he got GM
Community
In addition to my services, I am proud to present to you our Educational community, which is steadily growing on a daily basis. Aside from Coaching, it is an amazing place to connect with other people, find friends and talk about the game all of us love and enjoy. Various events are held on a weekly basis, from 1v1 tournaments to Team Contests, with nice rewards being given out! Hint, you might win a free session!
All of our coaches have been vetted and verified, being certain all of you guys get the best service available! Every single one has peaked at least Grandmaster, with a minimum of 250 Coaching Hours to their name.
Discord Community: CLICK HERE

• Upon joining, message me in order to have a Role assigned!

Prices?
Prices for my sessions are negotiable and I can guarantee, they fall onto the affordable part of the specter!
My coaching sessions are oriented and tailored to each student's specific needs, and they do cover everything from theory to live coaching, in-game mentality, etc.

I'm sharing my story here as I'm still trying to process what happened in the last two months, and hopefully, the community can help!
In mid-March, the right side of my face went numb. After a few weeks of this, I (24F) went to A&E who decided it was due to a migraine. Fast forward a week or so, I have balance issues, optic neuritis, tingling in my left side, unable to walk and couldn't form a coherent sentence. Nothing like this had happened to me before, I just had a few odd 'quirks' I dismissed. I had only heard of MS in passing and had pretty much no idea about it!
I went back to A&E who admitted me to hospital for an MRI. The next day (Easter Sunday lol) they pretty quickly diagnosed me with MS and put me on a 5-day course of steroids. The left-sided weakness, tingling etc started to improve, however, my MS team decided I needed a 5-day course of plasma exchange (PLEX).
On day 1 of the plasma exchange, (unknown to me) I started having another pretty severe relapse. I had tingling in my right side this time, and issues with my breathing and swallowing amongst various other things. After a few days, I went for another MRI that confirmed this, and my consultant put me on critical care watch and had me observed 24/7 due to the locations of my lesions. I was immediately put on another course of steroids. At this point, the MS consulting lead for the region got involved in my care, and basically explained the abnormality and how profound my MRI scan results had been.
All the progress I had made after the first relapse and steroids had basically been undone, and I started from 0, learning to walk, use my hands, etc. The day after I finished the second course of steroids, we agreed I needed to start Tysabri that day to help prevent further relapses, as mine had been so aggressive and close together.
After another week, I made it home, walking with a frame and support from my partner. As of writing this post, I've been home for over a month, had my second dose of Tysabri, and have improved massively. My sight has returned to normal, the majority of normal sensations have returned, and I can walk for 30 mins unaided. When I first went into the hospital, I honestly didn't think I would be able to walk again, and I didn't believe my MS Nurse when she told me it would get better. I am also starting a rehab program with my local neurophysiology team.
I feel like I'm coming to terms with my diagnosis quicker than I thought I would considering I had no understanding or knowledge of MS before this.
I wanted to share my story just because despite how shitty and confusing the diagnosis/relapses can be, it can get better! (Plus I want to become part of this awesome community)

About me
Hello there, my name is Coach Chesster(Yes, an obvious Chess reference, which is, by far, my favorite game). I've been playing League of Legends since season one, I've experienced everything from full AP Yi one-shotting my entire team to Tryndamere mains spinning around with a needlessly large rod instead of a sword. You could say I've been there during all the important historical moments of the game. I've been at the top of the ladder in Season 6 (Going between high Diamond and Challenger, based on how much time I've had to invest). I've competed in various tournaments, even being able to win a number of them, before I decided to get myself into coaching.
Coaching
I started the entire coaching thing during season 7 when one of my friends asked if I wanted to help him get out of that Diamond 4 hell. Ever since then, I was having a consistent number of sessions on a weekly basis, with my network of people slowly increasing(One of them actually gave me the idea to advertise on Reddit, which I did eventually accept!) I've coached more than 700 individuals ever since I started and I can proudly say I've had more than 500 sessions this year alone! So, if you are looking for someone who is around for more than 5 days actually add me.
Some of my personal coaching achievements include
Getting a player from Silver 1 to Platinum in just 5 weeks
Getting D2 to Masters in 2 weeks
Bronze 1 to Diamond, yes, this one happened as well, though it took slightly more time
Helping Duo players on NA reach Gold(They were actually stuck in Bronze 2 prior!)
Creating a coach from hard-stuck D2 after he got GM
Community
In addition to my services, I am proud to present to you our Educational community, which is steadily growing on a daily basis. Aside from Coaching, it is an amazing place to connect with other people, find friends and talk about the game all of us love and enjoy. Various events are held on a weekly basis, from 1v1 tournaments to Team Contests, with nice rewards being given out! Hint, you might win a free session!
All of our coaches have been vetted and verified, being certain all of you guys get the best service available! Every single one has peaked at least Grandmaster, with a minimum of 250 Coaching Hours to their name.
Discord Community: CLICK HERE

• Upon joining, message me in order to have a Role assigned!

Prices?
Prices for my sessions are negotiable and I can guarantee, they fall onto the affordable part of the specter!
My coaching sessions are oriented and tailored to each student's specific needs, and they do cover everything from theory to live coaching, in-game mentality, etc.

Tl;dr: Nephew's character tries to burn down someone's house, so I had the town guard arrest him and put him in jail.
So, I've been running games for some kids lately. One of them is my Nephew... and, I'll be honest, he kinda sucks. He's not very attentive when building characters, and says, "I don't care." a lot but, also, specifically rejects a lot of ideas. (Like, I wanted to give him a simple Barbarian character, but he said no and wanted an artificer.) And then gives the characters extremely unserious names. That last bit is fine, even charming... in a vacuum.
Then, in game, is greedy for the spotlight but often isn't even talking ab out the game. Then he does a lot of: "I punch him. Wait, no, actually no." Which would be, again, fine once in a session. Then he's always on about magical items that he has from other campaigns. The worst being, "The Wand of Ridiculousness." Which did a big shitload of damage. It's a whole thing.
My instinct is to chock it up to him being young. But, time before last, he wasn't even the youngest there. And the others were all model players. A little shy here, a little uninformed there, but mostly compliant, patient and engaged.
Anyway. The last game we only had one other kid there playing a cleric. I didn't want either of them to have come for nothing so I do a typical, "monsters attack the town." Thing. With the idea being that the monsters attack civilians until targeted, etc. That all goes fine, he and the cleric take out all the kobolds. I throw in a friendly minotaur barbarian to help.
Then, after the fight, he wants to go around and shoot all of the civilians making death saves to, "Put them out of their misery." The other guy, a cleric, got to them first with 'spare the dying' though. Then he says, "I set one of the buildings on fire." And rolled a nat 20 on a firebolt.
Friendly minotaur and the cleric step in and beat him into the ground. (Barbarians are just super strong at LV1, and he was out of spell slots so it wasn't close.) I was stuck between making sure something happened and not picking on my Nephew here... I decided to let him surrender, but also to not just let him get away.
Nephew, in character, tries to talk his way out of it (with -1 charisma) and fails. Cleric testifies against him to the town guard (And rolls a nat 20). Out of character Nephew is talking about how he wants to burn them all, and blow up the whole town and some other slightly unsettling threats. Called the cleric 'teachers pet' for talking to the guard. Guards haul him off to jail. But not before he manages to pickpocket the minotaur with his astonishingly good sleight of hand and stealth (Which is one of the things he actually cared about on his character.)
All his gold, stolen and otherwise, is seized as a part of his fine and his guy goes to jail. The End.
Give me a sanity check on this. I think I did the right thing and everyone left mostly content. But I'm stuck between, "I should have just had the minotaur and cleric beat him into the floor." and, "Maybe I was too harsh."

I - II
“Please. You have to remove Jumpy from the end of the episode.”
My animation supervisor looked at me with furrowed brows. “ We can't. We've already passed that sequence over.”
“Well then un-pass it. Just tell the client there was a technical error or something. We need to remove Jumpy from the background.”
He frowned at me and drank his coffee. A few people peered into the window of the meeting room, wondering why I was having another one-on-one with my boss.
“Elizabeth, it was you who wanted to add Jumpy in the first—”
“—I know! It was a terrible mistake. We should have never added him in. Please.”
He massaged his temple. “Why does it matter exactly? It's just a webcomic right?”
My hands were fidgeting, wringing each other constantly. I tried to keep my voice level.
“... If we don't remove jumpy, we are risking the well-being of countless generations of kids who watch this TV show. Lives are at stake.”
He put down the coffee cup and looked me in the eye. “Elizabeth, I know you had that elevator accident. And if you’re feeling … untethered … that’s okay.”
“I'm feeling totally fine. This has nothing to do with the elevator. Please just believe me when I say we need to remove that cartoon frog.”
He took a deep inhale and shook his head. “My hands are tied here Elizabeth. But if you want to talk to production, see if they are willing to communicate with the client for us to resubmit the animation sequence. Go right ahead.”
***
I spoke with production. I spoke with the head producer at our studio and explained how important it was to remove the frog from the background of episode six.
Everyone gave me strange looks and didn’t see the big deal, but I kept pushing.
Eventually, even the head producer said there was nothing that could be done.
The only person who had the power to make changes to episode six, was the client side boss. A wealthy studio exec who worked from home, some two hours away from my city.
His name was Paul Winslow.
I tried calling him, emailing him, messaging him via linkedin, slack and every other platform imaginable. But he was some big shot, and didn't have time to respond to anything.
I had given him three whole days. Three whole days where all I did was worry about my cousin’s nephews, and all the kids I could see going to the school across from my apartment.
This wasn't up to him anymore, It was up to me.
***
HR said I was required to take a ‘ leave of absence’ for 2 weeks as they ‘ reassessed’ something. This was fine with me, because It gave me the time I needed to execute my plan.
On a dark, overcast night I drove all the way to Paul Winslow's house.
***
It was dark, but I could still make out the black, wrought iron gates at the entrance. The intercom box on the right.
I had waited too long, the episode was going to release imminently, so I didn't have time to bother with the intercom. Instead, I flashed my high beams and pointed at the gate.
In view of my headlights, the iron gate started to shake and bend.
The middle latch snapped off.
Within seconds, the gate had been peeled apart as if it were made of putty.
I drove through.
Along the path, two large dogs came barking at my car, they looked eager to leap at my throat.
But before they could reach my bumper, there came a large, earth-shaking stomp. The dogs froze. Noses sniffed the air.
Their tails curled between their legs as they ran away.
I pulled up to the enormous front doors made of some kind of red cedar. The handles looked like they were made of polished bronze, or maybe even gold.
The expensive handles crumpled. The doors were torn from their hinges.
I walked in holding a laminated copy of my Jumpy sketch. I spoke loudly and assertively.
“Mr. Winslow. We need to talk.”
From upstairs, I could hear a panicked voice: “Who are you!? Get out of my house! I have a gun!”
Wasting no time, I pointed at the stairs. The bannister bent and splintered.
I waited at the foot of the stairs until I heard a gunshot, followed by shrieks.
“What the hell? What is happening?!”
Some banging and screaming ensued. When it turned into crying, I walked up the stairs.
Mr. Winslow was lying in a bathrobe on his hallway floor. I could make out the wet indentation of a heavy footprint on his chest. He looked up at me with watery, frightened eyes.
“Paul, believe me when I say I’m sorry I had to do this. But I had no other choice.” I said.
He whimpered as he spoke. “Is it money you want? I have gold in the attic. take as much as you want.”
“Lives are at stake. I need you to remove this character from the kids show you're making.” I held up the Jumpy sketch to his face.
“ …What?”
“You have the ultimate sign off. I need you to prevent episode six from airing.”
“You’re talking about … that singalong show?”
“YES! You have to prevent this character from ever being seen by anyone!”
“But it's already … It's already been sent to the streamers.”
“What!? What do you mean it's already been sent?”
“They’ve already released it in … Asia and Europe.”
I dropped the picture, and lowered my face to his. ‘Are you serious? Kids have already seen it!?”
Mr. Winslow's face was beginning to turn blue. “Listen. Do you have any idea how tight the turnaround is on children’s programming? I don't make the rules.”
“No no no!” I pulled at my hair.How could I be too late?
I stared at the air above the studio exec and pointed wildly. “Jumpy, is that true? Is there something you're not telling me? Have some kids seen you?”
The air slowly rippled into green, white and orange patterns, until all the colors solidified into the shape of a massive tree frog.
I looked at one of the frog’s massive red eyes. “Do you have other believers? Can you sense them already?”
Jumpy frowned, holding one hand on its stomach. “Only thing that Jumpy can sense. Is how hungry belly is.”
The frog eyed Mr. Winslow.
“No Jumpy!” I shouted. “We agreed, only as an absolute necessity.”
“Holy fuck!” Mr Winslow tried his best to wriggle out of Jumpy’s foot. “What is this thing? Is this real!?”
Jumpy lifted its foot. The man rolled out and crawled away.
“Jumpy!” I waved my arms. “What are you doing?!”
Mr. Winslow ran for the pistol lying on the floor at the end of the hall. Just as his fingers leaned down, A massive tongue whipped out and grabbed him by the head.
There was a crack and a twist.
Mr. Winslow's body lay face down on the floor. His shocked face was turned upwards, staring wide-mouthed at the ceiling.
“Now can I eat him?” Jumpy asked.
***
The following day I left town. Paul Winslow's sudden disappearance would eventually be traced back to me. Everyone at my work knew what I was after.
I had been obvious about it.
I had been stupid.
Terror prevented me from seeking Jumpy, but now survival has forced me to pair with the frog. It followed me wherever I drove.
Ironically, I was no longer afraid of the monster which used to keep me up at night, because I had turned into somewhat of a monster myself. A murderer on the run.
The silver lining was that when I finally got around to watching episode six of my company's kids show. You couldn't see Jumpy.
It was a sing-along show for young kids, and the baked-in lyrics on screen obscured the background characters for the whole sequence Jumpy was in. You couldn't even make out it was a frog.
And so here I am, driving from city to city. Never lingering too long.
I'm giving myself a few months to figure out what to do. I’ve mostly been staying in cheap hotels and hostels.
Every now and then I go swimming at the nearest public pool late at night. Jumpy always finds a way through the roof. We swim together.
Through Jumpy I’ve been learning more about my late twin sisters. They used the Jumpy a lot to get what they wanted.
But I don't need anything excessive. I don't want money, I don't want fame, I just want to live somewhere peacefully. Maybe teach synchronized swimming. If I can use jumpy to arrange that—it's enough for me.
As much as I hate it, I feel like I deserve to be the sole believer. To have this invisible creature haunt me, and follow me wherever I go.
I was a Whitaker sister after all.
Jumpy is my imaginary friend.