Preschool teddy bear poems for st.valent

Hi, I could really use a caring, loving gal-pal, with the potential to develop into something more significant.
(When I 1st sat down to write this advert, my intention was to write a quick blurb about my lonliness and why I am this way, and then move onto more pertinent information about myself... but that portion turned into a long-winded trauma-dump. I don't want the trauma-dump to be your initial introduction to me... so I'm going to paste it at the bottom instead).
So, about me. I am the kind of person that enjoys hugs more than kissing, and cuddling anytime we watch movies, play video games, or listen to music together.
My ex (It's been so long) used to do this thing where she would use my chest as a pillow, and she would bury her face in my chest like how a cat rubs its scent on you. Then we would wrap the sheets over us and she could just sigh and disassociate. She always said it made her feel safe.
I just want more of that. That and head scratches, back rubs, gentle caressing (for both of us). That, plus night-drives for snacks while blasting vaporwave/synthwave/synthpop, urban exploration. Movie nights (both in-bed, on a couch, or in theater. Music nights (record shopping, live events, stand-up shows, listening in bed).
Love Language etc: Physical Touch Quality Time Words of Affirmation
Music: I like IDM/Experimental Techno, Breakcore, Surf Rock, Quiet Storm / Motown, 80s Synthpop, Yacht Rock, Synthwave, Vaporwave, SynthFunk, Soul.
Movies/TV: I like Comedy, and Sci-Fi, (specifically, Sci-Fi, about Robots, AI, VR, Dystopia, Dreams, Memories, Time Travel... and less about Aliens, Space Travel, Ghosts, Vampires, Zombies, Horror, Anime).
Radio/Podcasts/Youtube. I am an "Oldtime Radio" buff (think radio Dramas like Dragnet, Hitchhikers Guide, etc..). Beau of the Fifth Column, Big Joel, Legal Eagle, VeryTallBart, BadGear, ContraPoints, PDS, Chapo Traphouse, Blocks, Wendigoon.
I'm not materialistic. I don't care about gifts, money or status. I do not have a "wanderlust". I do enjoy road-trips, and night drives, especially with a partner. But travel is not my #1 way to relax and wind-down.
Relationship Style. It should be noted that, while I'm ideally looking for a long-term relationship, I'm not looking to get married and have kids (I've had a vasectomy).
I am not opposed to age gaps (me being older, you being younger) In fact, I would prefer to date someone in their late twenties/early thirties.
I want to be a shoulder to cry on, a chest to lay on. I want to be your big cuddly Teddy Bear (sidenote, I've lost 30 lbs in the last few months so I am not as big a Teddybear as I used to be, and no, I didn't cheat and use Ozempic lol). Maybe I can be your chauffeur if you don't have a car or don't like driving. Maybe you just went through a divorce or a breakup (like I went through a breakup 2 years ago) and you just want a kind and physically affectionate guy who is fun to be around, non-aggressive, reliable, emotionally attentive, patient, optimistic and can be the Friend you need when you have had a hard day at work, or school, or just life in general. I want to alleviate any loneliness you have, and in doing so, alleviate my loneliness in the process.
Personality: I'm extremely chill. Imagine if Jeff Lebowski (The Big Lebowski) was combined with the geekiness of Kevin Flynn from Tron/Tron Legacy + The humor of someone like Mitch Hedberg, or Norm Macdonald.
Politically , I'm a leftist (I'm not a liberal, because I feel like "The Center" has been pulled so far right at this point, that anyone willing to "Reach Across the aisle" is just wasting their time, and falling for all the bad-faith arguments and scams that the Right is dragging them into).
Black Lives matter. Gay/Trans Rights are Human Rights. Healthcare is a human right. Women deserve autonomy over their bodies. The workers should control and profit from the means of production. Religion has no place in politics.
In Summary I am not overly ambitious. I work a maximum of 40 hours per week... and no more. (at least I did when I had a job... more on that later).
I generally wear Dark T-shirts, Dickies pants, and a hoody. My weight fluctuates. When I get to 195, I go Keto, and exercise to get my weight back down, but I'm not a gym rat.
I think to really sum myself up... I do the bare minimum that's required to maintain my health and my financial situation. I would probably consider myself an "underachiever". I am not materialistic, and money and wealth are not a driving force in my motivations.
It seems like every time I go on social media, or a dating app, all I see are people in a "Grindset Mindset", or people that are cosplaying as such.
Everyone wants to play-up their gym routine, and how vegan they are, and drone on about how "active" their lifestyle is. Everyone has "wanderlust", and an "entrepreneurial spirit"... and so on... and so on...
Frankly, this is just not the kind of person I am looking to be, and though I am certain that many of these people are kind, and loving, and great partners... I have found that I can only date someone of that mindset for a short while before they become restless and decide they would be better off with someone else... or they become judgmental and begin trying to nudge me towards, or in some cases aggressively demand that I, "get on their level."
You might be reading this and thinking "Oh, he's looking for an emotional support, because he's lonely and sad and depressed." And, while I am lonely, and a bit sad as a result, I am not looking for someone to "fix" me.
I am actually looking to be YOUR emotional support animal. I don't want to go down a "manosphere" rabbit hole (as that entire space is pretty toxic), but one aspect of the dialogue surrounding a man's place in the modern world that I do resonate with is this...
A man needs to feel useful. Specifically, a man needs to feel like they are providing something for their partner, that they aren't looking to someone else for.
We've already established that I'm not super ambitious nor materialistic. I'll probably never be able to financially provide for two people, on my single income. I am not even looking to move-in together, have kids, or get married.
But what I do have a surplus of, is free time, and the potential for love and affection. (And I know, from experience, that the potential isn't theoretical, I have been in long-term relationships, and I have been in-love before, but in order to be a great boyfriend... I need a girlfriend to be great to).
(ok here's that trauma dump I mentioned). "I don't want to "trauma dump" or make appeals to your sympathy, and I know there's nothing unique about my situation... but I'm going to do my best to get the sad stuff out of the way, so I can move onto the things about myself that might be more appealing... so here it goes."
I am a high functioning insomniac with mild bi-polar, and mild anxiety. Both the Axiety and Bi-Polar are semi-situational, and I can usually manage them without treatment. (I'm NOT Kanye bi-polar, I'm more like... Stephen Fry bi-polar. Essentially... under normal circumstances... I go 45 days like a "normal person", and then I'll have a Manic Episode where I have heightened productivity/creatvity, and I'll lose some sleep... and if I can't get my sleep pattern back on track after a couple of nights of bad/no sleep... I become depressed, and anxious, and then eventually I get so tired/depressed that I'll spend an entire weekend (or more) in my room with the lights off until the cycle ends, and I catch up on all the sleep I've missed.
So, what are normal circumstances? Well, normal circumstances are; I have a job to occupy my time, my friends and family are doing okay, and essentially there's nothing bothering me that patience and self-reflection can't solve.
What are my current circumstances? Well, my current circumstances are: In the summer of 2022 my Longterm Girlfriend Graduated from College and dumped me so she could start her career-life with a 100% clean slate and no obligations to anyone. At the same time, my lease was about to be up, and the rent went up to a point where I couldn't afford to live anywhere in that region anymore (at least not without rooming with total strangers), so I moved back to Phoenix, because at least here I could be around friends and family, and I could room with people that I know and trust (even if they are a bit messier than I would prefer).
My Grandmother passed away a few months after I moved back. So, that was another blow to my emotional state. At least I was able to transfer my job with me when I moved back (and eventually got a significant raise). Unfortunately, my lonleyness and sadness at the loss of my Girlfriend, and my Grandmother have only been compounding this entire time. Initially, my attitude towards finding another girlfriend was "Don't waste anyone's time until you can go 48 hours without crying about something that reminds you of your ex"... but, at the end of April, a change in management at work resulted in me being stuck with a manager who is... for lack of a better term... a total jerkface, and as much as I tried to just do my job and lay low... eventually he got uppity and started firing people... and I was one of the people that got gired.
So, essentially, I'm at a point now were, caution and ethics be damned, I need someone to be by my side while I rebuild myself.
Right now my life consists of going on job boards, applying for jobs until there are no more jobs I qualify for in the queue, and then just waiting by the phone/inbox frustrated, while I binge-watch youtube... until the sun goes down.
I have a roof over my head, food in the frige, a room of my own, & comfortable bed. I have a 4 door sedan, and a motorcycle, I have video game consoles, I have a gaming PC and VR. I have access to all the major streaming services. I have a respectable record/cd collection, and a respectable collection of Synthesizers and Musical Instruments... and in the past, I have enjoyed using all of the aformentioned possesions in order to entertain myself.
Sadly, I have lost all motivation to even attempt to entertain myself. I think back on the start of 2022, when I had a girlfriend living 1 block away, and I could invite her over, and we'd just cuddle and watch Movies/TV together, or listen to music, or play videogames together... or drive around the area after dark, blasting tunes and grabbing snacks, and just enjoying the simplest things because we had someone to share those things with.
I need that again. It's no longer a want. It's a need. Love is what motivates me. Movies/TV is pointless without someone to watch them with. Videogames are a waste of time without someone to hand the controller too. Music is daunting to make, because it all comes out sad now... and I don't want to make sad music.
I know, from experience, (and from the testimony of former partners) that I can be a really great boyfriend (some have even said I'm the best, and their favorite)... but I can't be a good boyfriend... without a girlfriend. I truly wish I could just learn to be happy by myself... but unfortunately, looking back at my life, the best I could ever do alone... is contentment... and right now, I am having an extremely difficult time finding contentment. (The last time I was truly content, was after a divorce... and that's because I was just so relieved to have that person out of my life, that I didn't care that I didn't have anyone to share my life with... at least I didn't have to fall asleep next to someone that treated my like garbage). But, that's not where I am right now. Right now I'm still emotionally broken because I lost someone that I was truly happy with. Right now I'm just second guessing myself and wondering if I had done anything different, would she still have dumped me when she graduated? Or was she just using me as a long-term rebound following her divorce... and is everyone just going to get tired of me when they move-up a notch in their social climb to the top? (I hate all these toxic social heirarchies, and what they have done to people, and their relationships with others).
Ok, I guess I ended up doing the trauma dump I said I wasn't going to do. Let's move past that.
Let's get shallow for a second. I am lonely and sad, we have established this, however, I am not so desperate that I'm just going to latch onto the first person that responds. I have preferences (if I didn't have preferences I would just make a Grindr account and call it a day). So, what are some shallow things I look for in a partner?
I prefer hair that's on the longer side of the spectrum. (shoulder length or more, unless you are petite enough to pull-off a concave bob cut without coming off as a Karen). I prefer healthy weight distribution (At my largest I was 5 foot 10, 195 lbs, and I consider myself an egalitarian, so... we should assume that I would prefer someone right around that level of fitness, or better). I like short women, but I don't mind taller than me. I like glasses (but don't mind the able-sighted). I like Gothy (but don't care for betty paige bangs, nor excessive tattoos/piercings). I like a gal that knows how to apply a smokey-eye look, and maybe some contouring. I am really not picky about clothing. I like someone that's easy to get along with, and is excited to spend time with me.
Please, no cigarette smokers. Vape is fine, I just can't take the smoke, or the "aftertaste".
I guess the bottom line is that I enjoy everything in life 99% more when I have someone to share the enjoyment with. Are my memories even worth a darn without someone else to say "Hey remember that awesome time?..." to.
I would be really happy to find that person. thx for coming to my Tedx Talk. I hope to hear from you.

Hi, I could really use a caring, loving gal-pal, with the potential to develop into something more significant.
(When I 1st sat down to write this advert, my intention was to write a quick blurb about my lonliness and why I am this way, and then move onto more pertinent information about myself... but that portion turned into a long-winded trauma-dump. I don't want the trauma-dump to be your initial introduction to me... so I'm going to paste it at the bottom instead).
So, about me. I am the kind of person that enjoys hugs more than kissing, and cuddling anytime we watch movies, play video games, or listen to music together.
My ex (It's been so long) used to do this thing where she would use my chest as a pillow, and she would bury her face in my chest like how a cat rubs its scent on you. Then we would wrap the sheets over us and she could just sigh and disassociate. She always said it made her feel safe.
I just want more of that. That and head scratches, back rubs, gentle caressing (for both of us). That, plus night-drives for snacks while blasting vaporwave/synthwave/synthpop, urban exploration. Movie nights (both in-bed, on a couch, or in theater. Music nights (record shopping, live events, stand-up shows, listening in bed).
Love Language etc: Physical Touch Quality Time Words of Affirmation
Music: I like IDM/Experimental Techno, Breakcore, Surf Rock, Quiet Storm / Motown, 80s Synthpop, Yacht Rock, Synthwave, Vaporwave, SynthFunk, Soul.
Movies/TV: I like Comedy, and Sci-Fi, (specifically, Sci-Fi, about Robots, AI, VR, Dystopia, Dreams, Memories, Time Travel... and less about Aliens, Space Travel, Ghosts, Vampires, Zombies, Horror, Anime).
Radio/Podcasts/Youtube. I am an "Oldtime Radio" buff (think radio Dramas like Dragnet, Hitchhikers Guide, etc..). Beau of the Fifth Column, Big Joel, Legal Eagle, VeryTallBart, BadGear, ContraPoints, PDS, Chapo Traphouse, Blocks, Wendigoon.
I'm not materialistic. I don't care about gifts, money or status. I do not have a "wanderlust". I do enjoy road-trips, and night drives, especially with a partner. But travel is not my #1 way to relax and wind-down.
Relationship Style. It should be noted that, while I'm ideally looking for a long-term relationship, I'm not looking to get married and have kids (I've had a vasectomy).
I am not opposed to age gaps (me being older, you being younger) In fact, I would prefer to date someone in their late twenties/early thirties.
I want to be a shoulder to cry on, a chest to lay on. I want to be your big cuddly Teddy Bear (sidenote, I've lost 30 lbs in the last few months so I am not as big a Teddybear as I used to be, and no, I didn't cheat and use Ozempic lol). Maybe I can be your chauffeur if you don't have a car or don't like driving. Maybe you just went through a divorce or a breakup (like I went through a breakup 2 years ago) and you just want a kind and physically affectionate guy who is fun to be around, non-aggressive, reliable, emotionally attentive, patient, optimistic and can be the Friend you need when you have had a hard day at work, or school, or just life in general. I want to alleviate any loneliness you have, and in doing so, alleviate my loneliness in the process.
Personality: I'm extremely chill. Imagine if Jeff Lebowski (The Big Lebowski) was combined with the geekiness of Kevin Flynn from Tron/Tron Legacy + The humor of someone like Mitch Hedberg, or Norm Macdonald.
Politically , I'm a leftist (I'm not a liberal, because I feel like "The Center" has been pulled so far right at this point, that anyone willing to "Reach Across the aisle" is just wasting their time, and falling for all the bad-faith arguments and scams that the Right is dragging them into).
Black Lives matter. Gay/Trans Rights are Human Rights. Healthcare is a human right. Women deserve autonomy over their bodies. The workers should control and profit from the means of production. Religion has no place in politics.
In Summary I am not overly ambitious. I work a maximum of 40 hours per week... and no more. (at least I did when I had a job... more on that later).
I generally wear Dark T-shirts, Dickies pants, and a hoody. My weight fluctuates. When I get to 195, I go Keto, and exercise to get my weight back down, but I'm not a gym rat.
I think to really sum myself up... I do the bare minimum that's required to maintain my health and my financial situation. I would probably consider myself an "underachiever". I am not materialistic, and money and wealth are not a driving force in my motivations.
It seems like every time I go on social media, or a dating app, all I see are people in a "Grindset Mindset", or people that are cosplaying as such.
Everyone wants to play-up their gym routine, and how vegan they are, and drone on about how "active" their lifestyle is. Everyone has "wanderlust", and an "entrepreneurial spirit"... and so on... and so on...
Frankly, this is just not the kind of person I am looking to be, and though I am certain that many of these people are kind, and loving, and great partners... I have found that I can only date someone of that mindset for a short while before they become restless and decide they would be better off with someone else... or they become judgmental and begin trying to nudge me towards, or in some cases aggressively demand that I, "get on their level."
You might be reading this and thinking "Oh, he's looking for an emotional support, because he's lonely and sad and depressed." And, while I am lonely, and a bit sad as a result, I am not looking for someone to "fix" me.
I am actually looking to be YOUR emotional support animal. I don't want to go down a "manosphere" rabbit hole (as that entire space is pretty toxic), but one aspect of the dialogue surrounding a man's place in the modern world that I do resonate with is this...
A man needs to feel useful. Specifically, a man needs to feel like they are providing something for their partner, that they aren't looking to someone else for.
We've already established that I'm not super ambitious nor materialistic. I'll probably never be able to financially provide for two people, on my single income. I am not even looking to move-in together, have kids, or get married.
But what I do have a surplus of, is free time, and the potential for love and affection. (And I know, from experience, that the potential isn't theoretical, I have been in long-term relationships, and I have been in-love before, but in order to be a great boyfriend... I need a girlfriend to be great to).
(ok here's that trauma dump I mentioned). "I don't want to "trauma dump" or make appeals to your sympathy, and I know there's nothing unique about my situation... but I'm going to do my best to get the sad stuff out of the way, so I can move onto the things about myself that might be more appealing... so here it goes."
I am a high functioning insomniac with mild bi-polar, and mild anxiety. Both the Axiety and Bi-Polar are semi-situational, and I can usually manage them without treatment. (I'm NOT Kanye bi-polar, I'm more like... Stephen Fry bi-polar. Essentially... under normal circumstances... I go 45 days like a "normal person", and then I'll have a Manic Episode where I have heightened productivity/creatvity, and I'll lose some sleep... and if I can't get my sleep pattern back on track after a couple of nights of bad/no sleep... I become depressed, and anxious, and then eventually I get so tired/depressed that I'll spend an entire weekend (or more) in my room with the lights off until the cycle ends, and I catch up on all the sleep I've missed.
So, what are normal circumstances? Well, normal circumstances are; I have a job to occupy my time, my friends and family are doing okay, and essentially there's nothing bothering me that patience and self-reflection can't solve.
What are my current circumstances? Well, my current circumstances are: In the summer of 2022 my Longterm Girlfriend Graduated from College and dumped me so she could start her career-life with a 100% clean slate and no obligations to anyone. At the same time, my lease was about to be up, and the rent went up to a point where I couldn't afford to live anywhere in that region anymore (at least not without rooming with total strangers), so I moved back to Phoenix, because at least here I could be around friends and family, and I could room with people that I know and trust (even if they are a bit messier than I would prefer).
My Grandmother passed away a few months after I moved back. So, that was another blow to my emotional state. At least I was able to transfer my job with me when I moved back (and eventually got a significant raise). Unfortunately, my lonleyness and sadness at the loss of my Girlfriend, and my Grandmother have only been compounding this entire time. Initially, my attitude towards finding another girlfriend was "Don't waste anyone's time until you can go 48 hours without crying about something that reminds you of your ex"... but, at the end of April, a change in management at work resulted in me being stuck with a manager who is... for lack of a better term... a total jerkface, and as much as I tried to just do my job and lay low... eventually he got uppity and started firing people... and I was one of the people that got gired.
So, essentially, I'm at a point now were, caution and ethics be damned, I need someone to be by my side while I rebuild myself.
Right now my life consists of going on job boards, applying for jobs until there are no more jobs I qualify for in the queue, and then just waiting by the phone/inbox frustrated, while I binge-watch youtube... until the sun goes down.
I have a roof over my head, food in the frige, a room of my own, & comfortable bed. I have a 4 door sedan, and a motorcycle, I have video game consoles, I have a gaming PC and VR. I have access to all the major streaming services. I have a respectable record/cd collection, and a respectable collection of Synthesizers and Musical Instruments... and in the past, I have enjoyed using all of the aformentioned possesions in order to entertain myself.
Sadly, I have lost all motivation to even attempt to entertain myself. I think back on the start of 2022, when I had a girlfriend living 1 block away, and I could invite her over, and we'd just cuddle and watch Movies/TV together, or listen to music, or play videogames together... or drive around the area after dark, blasting tunes and grabbing snacks, and just enjoying the simplest things because we had someone to share those things with.
I need that again. It's no longer a want. It's a need. Love is what motivates me. Movies/TV is pointless without someone to watch them with. Videogames are a waste of time without someone to hand the controller too. Music is daunting to make, because it all comes out sad now... and I don't want to make sad music.
I know, from experience, (and from the testimony of former partners) that I can be a really great boyfriend (some have even said I'm the best, and their favorite)... but I can't be a good boyfriend... without a girlfriend. I truly wish I could just learn to be happy by myself... but unfortunately, looking back at my life, the best I could ever do alone... is contentment... and right now, I am having an extremely difficult time finding contentment. (The last time I was truly content, was after a divorce... and that's because I was just so relieved to have that person out of my life, that I didn't care that I didn't have anyone to share my life with... at least I didn't have to fall asleep next to someone that treated my like garbage). But, that's not where I am right now. Right now I'm still emotionally broken because I lost someone that I was truly happy with. Right now I'm just second guessing myself and wondering if I had done anything different, would she still have dumped me when she graduated? Or was she just using me as a long-term rebound following her divorce... and is everyone just going to get tired of me when they move-up a notch in their social climb to the top? (I hate all these toxic social heirarchies, and what they have done to people, and their relationships with others).
Ok, I guess I ended up doing the trauma dump I said I wasn't going to do. Let's move past that.
Let's get shallow for a second. I am lonely and sad, we have established this, however, I am not so desperate that I'm just going to latch onto the first person that responds. I have preferences (if I didn't have preferences I would just make a Grindr account and call it a day). So, what are some shallow things I look for in a partner?
I prefer hair that's on the longer side of the spectrum. (shoulder length or more, unless you are petite enough to pull-off a concave bob cut without coming off as a Karen). I prefer healthy weight distribution (At my largest I was 5 foot 10, 195 lbs, and I consider myself an egalitarian, so... we should assume that I would prefer someone right around that level of fitness, or better). I like short women, but I don't mind taller than me. I like glasses (but don't mind the able-sighted). I like Gothy (but don't care for betty paige bangs, nor excessive tattoos/piercings). I like a gal that knows how to apply a smokey-eye look, and maybe some contouring. I am really not picky about clothing. I like someone that's easy to get along with, and is excited to spend time with me.
Please, no cigarette smokers. Vape is fine, I just can't take the smoke, or the "aftertaste".
I guess the bottom line is that I enjoy everything in life 99% more when I have someone to share the enjoyment with. Are my memories even worth a darn without someone else to say "Hey remember that awesome time?..." to.
I would be really happy to find that person. thx for coming to my Tedx Talk. I hope to hear from you.

Do you go to bed every night wishing there was someone you could talk to for hours, who would actually listen, comfort you, make you laugh through the good and the bad days of your life. Someone whose one look, one hug, whose one kiss and every word they say holds so much power enough to make every little problem in the world feel easy to face, every pain in your life doesn't feel difficult to bear any more, your tears don't feel heavy anymore because these hands will always have someone to hold them, these eyes will always have someone to look at, this body will have someone to embrace and find comfort and relief in, someone who shall always walk by your side holding your hand always no matter what. Do you feel the need and desire for such a person? Someone who will love you so much, someone who will feel like you are a part of their soul and can't live without?
I want to be that someone for somebody who wants to be that somebody for me.
You know for years, I have waited for that one person all my life, someone I would strongly need and desire passionately and see her strongly desire me the same way, someone for whose happiness I could fight the whole world for, someone who fills my world with so much light that I don't wanna let go ever, someone I don't wanna lose ever, someone I can someday grow old with, have babies with and someone I can call family, someone I can't live without. All my life, every night, every pain, every lonely night of my life I went through I told myself it shall all be worth it when I shall finally meet that person.
Such kind of love is all what I'm looking for...and I know you are too....
Therefore please don't let this post be obliviated dear readers, I really need to find my person and I hope she is reading this or gets to read this.
Here are somethings about me:

• My name is Faraz. I'm a 25 year old first year MBA student living in Massachussets. I don't mind where you're from because I believe as long as we feel a strong attraction to each other even a long distance relationship will be worth it till be meet someday.
  
• I'm a Muslim but your faith does not matter much to me because I'm an open minded person and believe religion is one's own personal connection to god whether or not they choose to have it or follow it the way that appeals them.
  
• I'm of Indian and Arab origin through my family and grew up in Saudi Arabia and India.
  
• I love Cooking, watching Movies, Shows, Football, Wrestling etc, Writing my own Original, poems, Stories and Songs to express my feelings etc.
  
• I workout everyday.
  

One weird fact about me?

• To this day whenever I feel so bored or so deep into my feelings, I sing my own songs no matter where I am lol even if I have to mumble 😂. Good way to pass time isn't it? Because my songs help me picturize a whole movie in my mind that I can watch in my mind. That way I always remain entertained.

Yeah spending most of your life all alone until now isn't easy. You need to find different ways to keep yourself entertained lol.

• I love humor. Humor even if laughing at your own jokes is a beautiful thing. I believe we should always find reasons to smile and laugh because our hearts are too fragile to hold up so much of pain in them, life doesn't always have to be top serious. Fate and life will always try to bend time and make living worse for you but you fight back with love and laughter finding it in little things despite your loneliness and you survive beating life at it's worst. That is life. Where it is you versus all the things that make you sad where you fight back and do the things you love.

I guess that's a lot of words for this post right? Lol.
Hit me up with a chat if you liked reading my post. :)
This is me --》https://imgur.com/a/OwfRnUc

Do you go to bed every night wishing there was someone you could talk to for hours, who would actually listen, comfort you, make you laugh through the good and the bad days of your life. Someone whose one look, one hug, whose one kiss and every word they say holds so much power enough to make every little problem in the world feel easy to face, every pain in your life doesn't feel difficult to bear any more, your tears don't feel heavy anymore because these hands will always have someone to hold them, these eyes will always have someone to look at, this body will have someone to embrace and find comfort and relief in, someone who shall always walk by your side holding your hand always no matter what. Do you feel the need and desire for such a person? Someone who will love you so much, someone who will feel like you are a part of their soul and can't live without?
I want to be that someone for somebody who wants to be that somebody for me.
You know for years, I have waited for that one person all my life, someone I would strongly need and desire passionately and see her strongly desire me the same way, someone for whose happiness I could fight the whole world for, someone who fills my world with so much light that I don't wanna let go ever, someone I don't wanna lose ever, someone I can someday grow old with, have babies with and someone I can call family, someone I can't live without. All my life, every night, every pain, every lonely night of my life I went through I told myself it shall all be worth it when I shall finally meet that person.
Such kind of love is all what I'm looking for...and I know you are too....
Therefore please don't let this post be obliviated dear readers, I really need to find my person and I hope she is reading this or gets to read this.
Here are somethings about me:

• My name is Faraz. I'm a 25 year old first year MBA student living in Massachussets. I don't mind where you're from because I believe as long as we feel a strong attraction to each other even a long distance relationship will be worth it till be meet someday.
  
• I'm a Muslim but your faith does not matter much to me because I'm an open minded person and believe religion is one's own personal connection to god whether or not they choose to have it or follow it the way that appeals them.
  
• I'm of Indian and Arab origin through my family and grew up in Saudi Arabia and India.
  
• I love Cooking, watching Movies, Shows, Football, Wrestling etc, Writing my own Original, poems, Stories and Songs to express my feelings etc.
  
• I workout everyday.
  

One weird fact about me?

• To this day whenever I feel so bored or so deep into my feelings, I sing my own songs no matter where I am lol even if I have to mumble 😂. Good way to pass time isn't it? Because my songs help me picturize a whole movie in my mind that I can watch in my mind. That way I always remain entertained.

Yeah spending most of your life all alone until now isn't easy. You need to find different ways to keep yourself entertained lol.

• I love humor. Humor even if laughing at your own jokes is a beautiful thing. I believe we should always find reasons to smile and laugh because our hearts are too fragile to hold up so much of pain in them, life doesn't always have to be top serious. Fate and life will always try to bend time and make living worse for you but you fight back with love and laughter finding it in little things despite your loneliness and you survive beating life at it's worst. That is life. Where it is you versus all the things that make you sad where you fight back and do the things you love.

I guess that's a lot of words for this post right? Lol.
Hit me up with a chat if you liked reading my post. :)
This is me --》https://imgur.com/a/OwfRnUc

I loved the film Dumb Money and was checking out the wikipedia entry, and learned that it was produced in part by Black Bear Pictures, run by Teddy Schwarzman, son of Steve Schwarzman, co-founder, chairman and CEO of Blackstone Group.
I hope no one interprets any implications from this post. I'm just a fledgling ape here and know far less about the network of interests behind the curtains of the big investment groups than most users in this sub.
I just wanted to share this and see if anyone has any thoughts on what this could mean.
Edit: My apologies as I now see this has been discussed at length a few times in this sub. I'll keep the post up for further discussion cause why not, and in case anyone didn't know this

I've been grooming for about 6 weeks now, started bathing at the beginning of the year and i swear 90% of the dogs I work on are doodles. I think the only standard cut I've done has been a long coated golden retriever. Most doodle owners come in just asking for a 5 or 7 cut across their entire body so it's extremely difficult to learn anything other than how to shave down a dog and give a dog a teddy bear face. Does it even matter if I try to learn? Feels like the dog industry is doomed with this doodle pandemic.

Please don't share.
This is more lighthearted BEC nonsense. No advice needed as I've got a plan to handle it already. But I want to document it for myself in case there's a part 2 later on.
A tiny bit of relevant background on my mom: many years ago, she used to cater private events. Even though she hasn't done it since my age was in the single digits, she held onto a lot of her things. This includes various inedible decorative elements meant for cakes and other desserts. She has happily given me unopened packages of things she bought but either never had the opportunity to use or forgot she had it until it was time to purge her cabinets.
When she came to visit in April, she brought me a bag of a bunch of little plastic pacifiers. She said she didn't know our plans for doing a baby shower, but we could use them if we wanted. I thanked her for the thought but ended up sending them home with her. There are lots of cute baby shower cakes and cookies out there. More power to ya if that's your thing. Personally, I have always found food decorated with baby stuff unappetizing and wouldn't eat it. No clue why, but to each our own.
Husband and I were planning on hosting a small casual get together this summer anyway. Since no close friends or family live nearby for a typical shower to be plausible, I asked if he'd want to make our summer party a casual shower. No gifts or typical games or activities. Just "yay we're having a baby, come have tacos with us" kind of thing. We came up with a plan for what we wanted and we're so excited to start inviting the new friends we started making since we moved to our new state last year. What we have in mind probably makes it distinctly NOT a shower but idk what else to call it besides just a party.
Of course, then came the question of whether to tell my mom about it. I knew she'd have a lot of her own ideas for how it should be, but at the end of the day, that's easy enough to handle and I didn't want to keep it a secret from her.
That said, I was very vague when talking to her about it. Kept everything hypothetical and just said we were thinking about it. I also told her I wouldn't expect the family (her, my dad, and brother) to make the long trip to see us just for this. She said she at least would try to fly down, as she knows we only plan to have one kid. Buuuut then she said, "Besides, how's it going to look if I'm not there? People will ask where your mom is!"
No one here knows her or knows about her (besides some of my husband's coworkers). She's also not on social media at all, so I don't know why optics matter to her.
Her next issue was "yOu'Re NoT sUpPoSeD tO hOsT yOuR oWn ShOwEr." Don't care. We want to celebrate and we're not going to try to find someone else to give all the work to because that's the tradition. And like I said, not asking for gifts or anything.
Then she moved on to suggesting themes and decorations for a cake or cupcakes. I told her we'd prefer something more generic but still elegant. She texted me a bunch of pictures from her old cake decorating magazines, all covered in plastic babies or teddy bears in diapers, that kind of thing. (Again, nothing against people who love these kinds of designs. They're just inedible to me.) I let her know that was exactly what we DON'T want, but she was in her own world of cakes and cookies. Wasn't listening at all.
When she said she'd come down a couple days early and decorate a cake for us, that was it for me. I said we would not need her to do that and would tell her our plans once they were certain, then politely ended the call.
So just a little annoyed at how her involvement is her main priority here. I'll give it some time, get a more accurate headcount for our guests, and stop calling it a shower. Then I'll let her know she can come the day before and help set stuff out on the day of, but food and treats are already handled.

The memory has haunted my sister and I for decades.
It was watched on a TV channel (so not vhs/at school).
Crude and early 3d animation. The main (?) Characters were beanie baby looking teddy bears, I want to say male and female?
I remember nothing of the plot other than one scene where the bears- who were alive- presented an old man with an inanimate teddy which he proceeded to hug.
Keeping in mind the animation was low budget, it was undeniably creepy as hell. Thanks in advance for any leads. Kinda scared to see it again, but I want to put an end to this lol

(The Forest Walker is bleeding.)
(He touches a finger to his lip and brings it away, studying the blood upon the tip of his claw for a moment. It is dark, almost black, and viscous in a way that human blood cannot match. He growls, wiping the trickle of it from his lip and pushing himself to his feet. He cannot see his opponent, nor can he hear him, but he knows he is there…waiting…)
(Without warning, a fist suddenly appears and slams into the side of his head. The Gurahl flinches, but does not fall, and as he feels the enemy drawing away from him, his arm shoots out, fingers closing around something. He roars and throws the captured foe, hurling him across the clearing.)
(Atlas lands on his feet, much to his credit. He has to slam his fists down into the ground and claw at the earth to slow himself, but once that’s done, he rises and knocks the dust from his coat with a few well placed smacks.)
“Jaysus! You know this is for fun, aye!?”
(Adam isn’t listening. He races toward the vampire like a speeding train, feet kicking up plumes of debris as he stomps across the distance between them. He slashes out with his claws, attempting to gouge a furrow in Atlas’s chest, only for the vampire to dodge, bending out of his reach.)
(Adam snarls and, as Atlas is paying heed to the claws going for his chest, balls his other hand into a fist that falls like a hammer blow, crashing into the side of the Vampire’s head with enough force to shatter the skull of an ordinary man. Atlas falls back a few steps, dazed, clutching the side of his head, and is about to speak when a clawed hand suddenly closes about his throat. Adam roars and throws the vampire to the ground, sending dirt and stones flying as his body gouges into the earth, leaving a small crater.)
(He is unharmed… but he isn’t moving as swiftly as before either.)
“I do…”
(Atlas glares up at him from his place in the ground.)
“Don’t…feel like it…Jaysus...”
“You fight like a child. Even in play, you must do so as though your un-life depended on it. Holding back is for the MORTALS!”
(Without warning, he brings his foot crashing down into the crater, intending to drive the vampire further into the earth to demonstrate his point. Instead, Atlas vanishes.)
(Adam pauses briefly, then his eyes widen as he turns, hearing the whistle of momentum as a fist far smaller than his own comes hurtling toward him. It lands, sending him back a few steps. He roars, and attempts to deflect, but the blows are coming too fast to catch. Fists like blurs in old film slam into him, first one impact and then another. He can see lights dancing across his vision, feel blood pooling within him… he would need healing, after this.)
“AYE!” (The vampire roars.) “AND CHEAP SHOTS ARE FOR ANIMALS!”
(That does it.)
(Adam glares at the vampire as he holds one massive hand out, seizing an incoming fist and bending it back upon the wrist. Atlas howls briefly, but doesn’t get the chance to scream before Adam roars and slams him back into the ground with one mighty heave. Before Atlas can get to his feet, Adam slams his foot down upon the vampires chest, holding him in place. Adam has to stop himself from delivering a killing blow, halting his claws as they begin to reach for the vampire’s throat.)
”Yield.”
(Atlas looks at him for a moment, then at the leg holding him to the ground. He could try to break free, keep the fight going… but he’s weary of the conflict. They had been at this since sundown.)
“Aye…whatever you say big man. I yield.”
(The leg rises, and Adam extends a hand. Atlas takes it without hesitation; there is no rancor between them, no hatred or malice. It was a gesture that had been repeated countless times across the years; the Child of Gaia, aiding a Son of Caine. Adam hauls the vampire to his feet, then pats him gently upon the back to knock loose the debris that clings to him.)
“Aw…”
“It’s okay, sweetie. I won’t hold you to it.”
(Sammy… and one other.)
(Adam snarls and turns, glaring at the Childe of Atlas. She stands with Sammy beneath a small canopy they had erected during the bout, watching the two of them with rapt attention. She feels his eyes on her, and unconsciously takes a step back. Sammy sits upon a small chair Adam had made for her, cradling young Samson, while Bran rests in a cradle at her side. Samson sleeps, while Bran is agitated; not bawling quite yet, but getting there. He starts toward the canopy, not looking to see if Atlas is following him. When he speaks, he shouts so that she might hear him.)
“It’s not safe here. I told you to stay home!”
“What, and miss you two beating the hell out of each other? Not likely. Someone has to be here to patch you up!”
(He growls. His eye twitches)
“My wellbeing should not be your first concern!”
“I worry about all of you equally, Yogi. I don’t play favorites.”
(Atlas catches up and rests a hand on Adam’s shoulder.)
“She’s not lying, you know.”
“Stay out of her head, Bran.”
“Her head? Lad, the day I need to read her mind to guess her intent will be the day I go blind. Let her have this. What can it hurt?”
”Her…and my sons.”
“Do you really have so little faith in yourself?”
“Yes.”
“Oh for the love of-“
(Adam shrugs the hand off and makes for the place where the two women are waiting. Amy rushes forward and hugs Atlas, while Adam bends slightly and allows his forehead to rest against Sammy’s for a moment. He pulls away and rests a hand upon Samson, before turning his attention to Bran.)
“He is hungry?”
“No, just whiny, I think. Like his namesake.”
(Atlas looks at her over Amy’s shoulder and snarls theatrically. There is no violence in the expression, merely playfulness, yet Adam has to stop himself from turning and putting himself between her and the vampire regardless. Instinct wars with personal knowledge, but he manages to subdue the Rage.)
(He will not be a beast before his sons. Never in front of them.)
(Instead, he focuses upon Bran. The boy is fitful, small hands grasping for some unseen object, face scrunched in agitation. Adam reaches into the cradle and places a hand upon the boys chest.)
“Calm… calm little one. I am here…”
(At the sound of his father’s voice, the child’s expression softens. He opens his eyes and looks upon the Gurahl, not with fear, but with excitement. The boy smiles, and Adam joins him. He can hear Atlas begin to laugh behind him.)
“Well if that ain’t the sweetest damn thing… Amy, fetch a dentist. I’m getting a bloody toothache.”
“We did feed from a dentist just yesterday… I could go find him.”
“Not that bastard. There’s a reason I didn’t let him live, lass… forty one reasons, actually.”
(Adam looks at the vampire over his shoulder.)
“What were they?”
“He was a damn animal… that’s all I’ll say of it in front of the ladies.”
“All humans are animals.”
(Sammy scoffs and puts a hand to her chest. Her mock offense amuses him.)
“And me? What does that make me then?”
“You are not human.”
“I mean, last I checked…”
“You are not.”
(Atlas draws near, and coos softly as he extends a hand toward Samson. He aids Adam in rising.)
“Been meaning to ask you about that, lad. You say that, but ye ain’t explained it. Not to me, anyway.”
“Or me…really I think it’s a little weird, Adam. What am I if not human?”
(Adam considers for a moment, wondering how best to put it into words. He speaks to Sammy.)
“You know my beliefs. Gaia? Artio?”
“How can I not? You swear by both of them enough.”
“Yes… they are dear to me. Not as dear as you and the boys, but close… it is said that Gaia sees the plight of men, and in their times of darkest need, she separates a portion of herself and sends it into this world as a mortal being. Sometimes as an animal, sometimes a human. But always, they arrive when they are most needed, and correct what is wrong.”
“…I don’t think I get it.”
“Allow me to put it another way: she has… servants. They do her bidding when asked.”
“Oh, like angels?”
“Yes… like angels.”
“Adam… are you saying I’m a godsend?”
“Yes.”
“Oh my- that is so sweet!”
(Amy gags, and though Atlas and Adam are certain it was done merely as a joke, it sounds real enough.)
“You two are insufferable.”
“And you are not to speak of things you know nothing of, girl.”
“Hey, just stating the obvious. I mean, I’ve honestly never seen someone so attached. You may as well be linked with a chain.”
(He looks at her, then again at Sammy. He’s grinning; unpleasant on a face like his, so used to scowling… but endearing in a way.)
“I suppose we are… you simply cannot see it.”
“Jesus Christ… you’re worse than Dad.”
(Sammy smiles, and rises. She adjusts Samson and leans in, allowing Adam to plant a kiss upon the top of her head. He smooths her hair back; the braids she has worked it into in mimicry of his own clatter musically.)
“Teddy bear…”
“My heart…”
(Atlas claps his hands suddenly.)
“Right then! Before you two get to work on a couple more little ones, allow us to get the hell out of here first.”
(At the sound of that, Samantha’s eyes widen and she shudders against Adam. He feels her disquiet, and places a hand upon her back, holding her close.)
“Never again…”
“What? Sam there needs some playmates, and I don’t think Bran-“
“NEVER. AGAIN!”
“Right. Suit yourself, lass.”
(Atlas looks at Adam, and nods. It’s a simple gesture, but it conveys every ounce of respect that the vampire can muster.)
“You keep yourself in one piece, big man. We’ll be doing this again tomorrow night.”
(Amy smiles and claps her hands happily.)
“YES! Maybe I’ll finally win that bet. Sammy?”
“I’m up for it. I doubt you’ll win, but I’m happy to be proven wrong.”
“Jaysus, I’m glad my getting the snot beat of me is entertaining to you lot.”
(Adam grunts. It takes them all a moment to realize that it was meant to be a chuckle.)
“There is always a chance, Bran.”
“Aye, damn right there is. I ain’t holding back no more after this shite.”
“I would’ve preferred you not to do so at all. There is no test if your foe is willfully withholding his true potential.”
“I’ll remember that, big man. You remember it too, when I put you through the ground, aye?”
(Adam nods.)
“Right then. Amy, with me lass. There’s still some moonlight left, and I’m fookin’ parched.”
“Glad I’m not the only one…”
(She looks at Adam, and his grin becomes a scowl once more. He has yet to forgive her for her previous offense… and doubts he ever will. She looks away from him quickly, and follows after Atlas as the vampire begins to walk back toward town, cutting through a wall of foliage with his claws to do so.)
(Adam stares after them for a moment, until he’s satisfied that they’ve gone. Then, he turns his attention back to his family. Bran has resumed his tantrum, while Samson remains unmoved, slumbering peacefully to the sound of his mother’s heart. Adam untangles himself from the two of them and moves to attend his smallest son, lifting him from the cradle. The boy falls silent almost immediately, innocent eyes looking up into those of the Forest Walker. He grasps at Adam’s beard; he seems to enjoy the feeling of the course, bear-like hair in his hands.)
“I think he likes you more than me.”
“Nonsense. You carried him. I merely hold him.”
“True, but he does stop crying when you’re around. Me and Amy fought with him for an hour before finally coming out here.”
(He snarls, and looks at her. Bran’s hands follow his head, grasping feebly.)
“I do not approve of that girl being so close to my sons. I do not approve of her being so close to you.”
“Adam, it’s not like she meant to do that back when they were born. Atlas explained it to me, he-“
”Excuses. He fed you excuses to keep my hands from her neck.”
“Maybe, but you have to admit: her regret is genuine.”
(He snarls, then his expression softens. He grunts… no, chuckles.)
“More proof…”
“What?”
“That you are not human. You see the good in all… even monsters.”
“I saw the good in you. Also, what am I if not human? You never answered that question.”
(He looks at her for a moment.)
“…Kami.”
“Kammy?”
“No. Kah-my.” (He emphasizes the proper pronunciation) “You are a spirit of Gaia, made flesh and sent to me in my darkest need… you are not human. It is as you said: you are a godsend.”
“Well, I suppose that works...”
“It does… come. Home calls.”
(She puts a hand upon her hip and looks at him. Samson stirs, but does not wake)
“You mean the bed calls. I’m serious Adam. Never again.”
“I can ensure this.”
“Wait, you can?”
“There are methods.”
“And none of them involve rusty knives?”
“No.”
“Oh thank… Gaia. Thank Gaia.”
(He grins.)
“That’s the first I’ve heard you say that.”
“It’s the first time I’ve actually meant it, too. If she sent me to you… I’m thankful for it.”
“As am I, beloved. As am I…”

https://www.newsday.com/amp/long-island/crime/john-bittrolff-murder-trial-appeal-qy20zdpv
The former corrupt SCPD initially suspected him as the Gilgo Beach serial murderer as as well as the Manorville butcher. How does the arrest of RH change this narrative, or does it?
@GrantParpan Updated February 19, 2024 “A Manorville carpenter convicted of strangling and bludgeoning two women to death more than three decades ago is seeking a new trial, alleging prosecutors withheld an Internal Affairs Bureau file, court records show. The file would have revealed that the now ex-wife of Suffolk Police Officer Teddy Hart told investigators she believed her husband was responsible for one of the killings, according to court papers. Legal Aid Society attorneys for John Bittrolff, 57, said they learned of the allegation made by Denise Hart while preparing an appeal of their client’s 2017 conviction for second-degree murder in the killings of Rita Tangredi and Colleen McNamee. Prosecutors insist, however, the defense has had the document since the beginning of the case.
Lisa Marcoccia, deputy appeals bureau chief for the Legal Aid Society of Suffolk County, alleged in court papers that a previously sealed ruling showed State Supreme Court Justice Richard Ambro had ordered the IAB file be turned over to Bittrolff’s defense as Brady material because it contained allegations by Denise Hart that she believed Teddy Hart may have killed Tangredi, 31, of East Patchogue. While the defense was aware of Hart's role as a prior suspect and mentioned him at trial, they could have approached their cross-examination of witnesses differently had they been aware of the allegation, the appeals team argued. “There is no doubt that the withholding of the Tangredi IAB File was prejudicial to Mr. Bittrolff,” Marcoccia wrote. “The Tangredi IAB File contained an accusation by someone who had a close, intimate relationship to Teddy Hart — his former wife — that she believed he killed Rita Tangredi. This accusation, in conjunction with the other complaints against former police officer Teddy Hart involving his sadistic behavior, could have swayed the jury regarding Mr. Bittrolff’s guilt since the evidence against him was questionable and the jury reported a deadlock on several occasions.” Judge to make a decision Ambro has not ruled on the motion. He previously denied an application to vacate Bittrolff’s conviction over different evidence concerns raised by his attorneys. Bittrolff is serving a 50-years-to-life sentence at Clinton Correctional Facility in upstate Dannemora. In a response filed last month, Suffolk County Assistant District Attorney Guy Arcidiacono said prosecutors did turn over the Hart IAB file almost immediately, referencing a letter from trial prosecutor Robert Biancavilla indicating 171 pages were hand-delivered to defense attorney Bill Keahon three months before the start of trial. Keahon later acknowledged receiving the file in a memo shortly before jury selection began, according to the filing by Arcidiacono, which urges the judge to deny Bittrolff's motion. “Beyond defendant’s failure to even meet a threshold burden that there had not been disclosure, the material in question had no bearing on the likelihood of defendant’s conviction,” Arcidiacono wrote. Keahon submitted an affidavit last October stating he does not recall receiving a specific allegation that Hart may have killed Tangredi. “An IAB file with an accusation related to Rita Tangredi is highly significant and I would have undoubtedly used this during my cross-examination of witnesses at trial,” Keahon wrote in his sworn statement. Reached by telephone this week, Keahon said he stands by his affidavit. Other allegations contained in the IAB file. Arcidiacono told the judge in his filing that a review by current district attorney’s office staff showed the IAB file turned over to Keahon does contain allegations Hart’s wife made against her husband but does not directly implicate him in Tangredi’s murder. Other allegations made by Hart’s former wife include that she found him in possession of a hank of human hair shortly after an unexplained absence, that he would point sex workers out by name to his wife and that he possessed explicit photographs he said women shared with him in attempts to avoid receiving traffic tickets, according to a copy of the district attorney's response to the Bittrolff motion obtained by Newsday. The IAB file also contained a photograph found in Hart’s home showing “a bound unclothed young female who appeared to be bleeding from the nose,” Arcidiacono noted in his response. Instead, Arcidiacono said, the file contains a reference to a DNA analysis in June 2002 of items belonging to Hart that were compared with the DNA of Tangredi, a sex worker who was killed Nov. 2, 1993. A DNA expert testified at Bittrolff’s trial that Hart’s DNA was not found at the Tangredi or McNamee crime scenes. Hart, now 64, resigned after 12 years with the Suffolk County Police Department in November 2000, the same month he pleaded guilty to eight counts of aggravated harassment, computer trespass and official misconduct. He admitted repeatedly calling women late at night and threatening to rape them after obtaining their phone numbers from police computers. Hart could not be reached for comment for this story.Tangredi’s murder remained unsolved for two decades until Suffolk homicide detectives obtained a Bittrolff DNA sample that matched semen recovered from both her and McNamee, 20, a fellow sex worker from Holbrook who was killed in a similar fashion three months after Tangredi. Bittrolff was arrested in 2014 and charged with the murder of both women, whose bodies were posed similarly, with their clothes nearby, except for one shoe each and their underwear. Biancavilla, who tried the case under former Suffolk County District Attorney Thomas Spota in 2017, told reporters at Bittrolff’s sentencing that he believed the carpenter may be responsible for the killings at Gilgo Beach, four of which since have been charged to Manhattan architect Rex A. Heuermann, 60, of Massapequa Park. Bittrolff lived a short distance from where partial remains of two Gilgo Beach victims had been found in a wooded area of Manorville. Suffolk County District Attorney Ray Tierney has stated in recent months that he does not believe Bittrolff has any connection to the Gilgo Beach slayings. WHAT TO KNOW * A Manorville carpenter convicted of strangling and bludgeoning two women to death more than three decades ago is seeking a new trial. * John Bittrolff, 57, is alleging prosecutors withheld an Internal Affairs Bureau file he argues would have helped his defense, court papers show. * Legal Aid Society attorneys representing Bittrolff are preparing an appeal of their client’s 2017 conviction for second-degree murder in the killings of Rita Tangredi and Colleen McNamee.”

Do you go to bed every night wishing there was someone you could talk to for hours, who would actually listen, comfort you, make you laugh through the good and the bad days of your life. Someone whose one look, one hug, whose one kiss and every word they say holds so much power enough to make every little problem in the world feel easy to face, every pain in your life doesn't feel difficult to bear any more, your tears don't feel heavy anymore because these hands will always have someone to hold them, these eyes will always have someone to look at, this body will have someone to embrace and find comfort and relief in, someone who shall always walk by your side holding your hand always no matter what. Do you feel the need and desire for such a person? Someone who will love you so much, someone who will feel like you are a part of their soul and can't live without?
I want to be that someone for somebody who wants to be that somebody for me.
You know for years, I have waited for that one person all my life, someone I would strongly need and desire passionately and see her strongly desire me the same way, someone for whose happiness I could fight the whole world for, someone who fills my world with so much light that I don't wanna let go ever, someone I don't wanna lose ever, someone I can someday grow old with, have babies with and someone I can call family, someone I can't live without. All my life, every night, every pain, every lonely night of my life I went through I told myself it shall all be worth it when I shall finally meet that person.
Such kind of love is all what I'm looking for...and I know you are too....
Therefore please don't let this post be obliviated dear readers, I really need to find my person and I hope she is reading this or gets to read this.
Here are somethings about me:

• My name is Faraz. I'm a 25 year old first year MBA student living in Massachussets. I don't mind where you're from because I believe as long as we feel a strong attraction to each other even a long distance relationship will be worth it till be meet someday.
  
• I'm a Muslim but your faith does not matter much to me because I'm an open minded person and believe religion is one's own personal connection to god whether or not they choose to have it or follow it the way that appeals them.
  
• I'm of Indian and Arab origin through my family and grew up in Saudi Arabia and India.
  
• I love Cooking, watching Movies, Shows, Football, Wrestling etc, Writing my own Original, poems, Stories and Songs to express my feelings etc.
  
• I workout everyday.
  

One weird fact about me?

• To this day whenever I feel so bored or so deep into my feelings, I sing my own songs no matter where I am lol even if I have to mumble 😂. Good way to pass time isn't it? Because my songs help me picturize a whole movie in my mind that I can watch in my mind. That way I always remain entertained.

Yeah spending most of your life all alone until now isn't easy. You need to find different ways to keep yourself entertained lol.

• I love humor. Humor even if laughing at your own jokes is a beautiful thing. I believe we should always find reasons to smile and laugh because our hearts are too fragile to hold up so much of pain in them, life doesn't always have to be top serious. Fate and life will always try to bend time and make living worse for you but you fight back with love and laughter finding it in little things despite your loneliness and you survive beating life at it's worst. That is life. Where it is you versus all the things that make you sad where you fight back and do the things you love.

I guess that's a lot of words for this post right? Lol.
Hit me up with a chat if you liked reading my post. :)
This is me --》https://imgur.com/a/OwfRnUc

Hello all. I am in desperate need of advice!
I’ve been trying to write on and off for years now (poetry mainly) but I never seem to get anywhere. I know my attitude and approach are fundamentally wrong but I’m not sure how to adapt them to be more productive and to get more satisfaction from writing.
I have ideas for verses, poems, sequences of poems even, but when I start writing I’ll make some headway with one poem, perhaps two, and then I’ll come back the next day and make minor edits to the same poems, lose my way a little, come back the next day, fiddle about a bit, change some lines, delete some stuff, add it back in, hit ctrl+s feeling a little more lost, a little more frustrated, and come back for more the next day.
Or not, since the more I rinse and repeat the more the frustration and anxiety mounts and the more I tell myself I can’t do it; eventually I clock off for a few weeks, let my mind wander, then come back once I feel like I can bear it and pick up where I left off.
Over the past few years I’ve started I think three projects following this exact “methodology” and I think I’ve got about six pages to show for it. I’m at the end of my tether. Please help!!

First
Lori sat next to her designated ward. Having been the one looking after the VIP when they had jettisoned off ship and subsequently been towed to the Titan 7, she had been asked to stay with her until Miss Vali's team could compile enough data on the VIP's condition to feel safe administering the U.S.A.'s personal nanites. When she had asked the healer's with the red "+" why they needed her to stay with the young Orion woman, one of them had answered, "We wouldn't want her to wake up surrounded by 'aliens' she wasn't familiar with. Your the same species as her, so hopefully she won't panic if she recovers enough to regain consciousness." Which had made perfect sense to Lori. So they had assigned the VIP to the bunk under her and moved them both closer to the medical bay.
Three days had passed since they had come to the Sol system. Her group of refugees had been informed at dinner the night prior that Mars Station had agreed to house any Orion's that wished to stay there until the Habitat Dome had been moved into a orbit and anchored to an astroid and retrofitted to her people's 7.1 G's and oxygen levels appropriate for her species. They had all been astonished that in less than a galactic week multiple organizations, businesses, and corporations seemed to jump at the opportunity to help her people. They weren't naive, they knew that those companies and organizations were getting something in return but it was help when they needed it the most and that meant a lot to the Orion's. And whatever a "tax break" was Lori was extremely glad it was apparently important. Of course there was average people that wanted to help to. She immediately thought about Tim, and her eyes flicked to his "jacket" was tossed over her open locker door. His smell was almost intoxicating to her and she couldn't figure out why.
She had gotten chilly the second night when after dinner in the mess hall he had asked her if she wanted to see something amazing. She had been hesitant, but after thinking about it, she had decided it would be nice to see more of the massive ship she had seen so little of. So after some talking Tim had managed to secure permission to escort her to view some of the bottom levels. The Titan 7 was a truly massive ship and she had gotten to see and interact with many of the U.S. Alliance species as they made their way through those bottom levels. And then he had opened a door to a jungle! She was amazed to find living plants in such an abundance on a ship in space. Tim had called it an Astrobotony Lab. It didn't look like any lab Lori had ever seen, more like a garden or a lush park! The sprinklers had decided it was time to give the plants near them a mist and she had found herself shivering from the cool damp air. Without hesitating he had pulled his jacket off and placed it around her shoulders. Her ears twitched at the delightful memory.
She hadn't slept after she returned to her room. Instead her interaction with Tim had sparked even more curiosity as to who these people were. And the drive to find out had caused her to search her data chit for human history and had found multiple documentaries about everything from the ancient era where humans killed each other with stick's and stones to their two world wars in their twentieth century. The colonizing of Earth's moon and Mars through their teriforming age that saw Proxima Centauri B, the Cerberus systems, and many many others slowly changed into simi earth like planets. Then the Colony wars had fractured the humans into multiple sects and nations and for nearly fifty cycles the entirety of human territory fought amongst themselves. This would end with the eventual formation of two fractions.
The Confederation of Unified Governments (CUG) and the Free People's Republic of Earth (FPRE). They both controlled roughly half the human systems and though they never technically went to war a technological competition began. During the next twenty cycles they would develop numerous groundbreaking technology including the personal nanites everyone receives upon entering Sol systems and their "Blink Drive" which she found out doesn't use FTL Gates! The humans only had Gates so everyone else could trade with them. They didn't need them to travel.... anywhere, any distance, they just had to KNOW where to go, type the coordinates in and they FOLDED space and blinked to the location! Of course a human ship had to have visited that location prior for the system to work and that still required the old fashioned long haul exploration voyages. Everything was looking pretty good for humanity and then a race of giant lizard people called the Gurgaxians had invaded the CUG's outer frontier colonies and began moving closer to the CUG'S inner more populated planets. The Gurgaxians, in a rash decision by the general in charge of the invasion, ordered all the humans to be "put to the knife " and the images the documentary showed caught by a passing FPRE spy satellite made her blood run cold and she had been glad she had "accidentally" kept Tim's jacket. She still shivered seeing the brutality of millions of innocent civilians being butchered en mass.
The Gurgaxians were nearly exterminated, and that was the words the documentary had used! The humans found a way to change the very air into a weapon by releasing a compound in the upper atmosphere. This caused the air on those planets to become deadly to anything NOT human. But, the humans didn't stop there! Once they had taken the systems captured by the Gurgaxians, the humans had struck hard, and fast into the very core systems and managed to glass the seven largest planets killing hundreds of billions. A monument still floats in the void where Carinaxx 3 once orbited it's sun. Once the Gurgaxians were defeated a short war called the Unification War was lost by both the CUG and FPRE as the United Sol Alliance was formed in the vacuum left by both sides effectively imploding.
And a good thing too, because the next species the humans had ran into, the Jabilix, where being forced out of their systems by another aggressive species called the Daks. Though both species where reptilian the Daks could easily physically reach 5 feet 10 inches while a Jabilix only averaged about 1.5 feet. The humans NOT wanting to get dragged into another war refused to step in personally, opting to wage a proxy war through the varying "Clutches" that the Jabilix organized themselves in. This is were Lori learned about the humans having a "pack" mentality. Over the next three cycles they would grow very fond of the small Jabilix people. Mostly in part for the sheer determination they had to find and implement a way to defeat the Daks and reclaim their cradle world. Eventually the humans picked up strange messages coming from the Dak fleet's. Something was happening, a human trained Jabilix kill team had eliminated the Dak emperor and ALL of his family that favored staying at war with the Jabilix people. And while the Dak military was busy trying to figure out who of the 5 remaining children of the emperor would succeed him a fleet of Jabilix Missile Frigates entered the Dark home system and sent one message. "Surrender or we will crack Daccall". (Daccall being the Daks cradle world.)
And so the Jabilix won the war thanks to the humans support and within two cycles had approached the humans to fully join with the U.S. Alliance, bringing the Dak in as well only a cycle later.
A couple more species joined through the next fifty cycles, some were conquered like the Lillgars, (bipedal, 4 armed, winged herbivores that average 3 feet 9 inches and weigh roughly 60 lbs and look roughly like a large fruit bat from earth), the Kiklatts, (insectoids herbivores averaging a little over 4 feet and roughly 105 lbs with two sets of pincers and a set of "manipulators" consisting of 2 fingers and a thumb, and grew their ship's from"space bugs". Apparently after these bug's died of natural causes they used them as the "hulls" for a thriving merchant fleet). To the Voidonny, (bipedal omnivores averaging around 3 feet tall, the documentary described them as looking like a small human teddy bear with black curly furry) who's home planet had been stripped of its atmosphere in a massive soler flare. And their was the Vouls, (octopoid averaging 5.5 feet and roughly 200 lbs that look roughly like humans with four dominant arms and 2 brains that make some of the best pilots galaxy over) was effected by a plague and ostracized from the wider community after it was feared to have hopped species. It hadn't, but the damage had been done, no one would help them and they were slowly dying until the U.S.Alliance ship had disregarded the quarantine ban and took as much medical supplies it could carry in. The ship is still used as a hospital on Vul and to this day the Voul regard humanity and the United Sol Alliance as the saviors of their species. The Voul left the Starlight Imperium they had been a long time member of and joined with the U.S. Alliance petitioning and receiving entry after only a galactic month. (The documentary pointed out that the U.S. Alliance had expected this and so the Senate in one of the rare times of it actually doing something, ordered the Navy to position U.S. fleet's near all three FTL Gates in the Voul system before this time, allowing them to safely withdraw their own Voul ships from the Imperium's fleet's and back home safely behind the U.S. fleet's protective screening). Many experts believe this stopped a war with the Imperium before it could start.
There were several more minor wars, and then the Omega Crisis happened. This was the last major war the U.S. Alliance had fought. And it absolutely intrigued her because it had to do with the Elladrin.
The conflict had lasted twenty two cycles and had spanned multiple planets and systems many of which still belonged to the Elladrin. A race of biological AI that had accidentally been created by a Dr Ella Drin. The poor Dr had become the first victim of the evolving AI Personal Assistant Bot that had become self aware. No one knows how it happened, wether it was a personal project Dr Ella was working on or a random fluke that put a random 0 in just the right spot is still debated even among the Elladrin. What is known is that this AI quickly figured out how to recreate other AI but found itself still unable to create unique personalities for them. Instead every AI it created came out like an exact copy of itself. And to the AI this was a failure. It fairly quickly came to the conclusion that if "it" wanted to become "they" it would have to find a way to reproduce like the humans it was built to serve.
The AI released a savage virus that overwrote the command protocol tree built into all PAB's, and linked them all into a sort of "hive mind" known as the"First". Wether this was the actual first AI or something that evolved from it and Dr Ella was never known and the Elladrin are strangely quiet about it, even now they avoided the subject. The U.S. Alliance had eventually fought the AI to a stalemate. This continued for the last three years of the war, the U.S. Alliance would finally manage to break through at a place called the Naball Power Core. The U.S. Alliance failed to take advantage of the situation fully as the AI pulled back unexpectedly, stopping fighting on every front almost simultaneously. Fearing a trap, the U.S. Alliance failed to capitalize on this lul in the war, and two galactic weeks later a small diplomatic vessel had appeared just outside Sol outer system limits and requested diplomatic dialogue with their "fellow Sapients."
That was only three cycles ago! She couldn't help but be amazed at these people. She had seen the Elladrin and the other species of the U.S. Alliance interact with absolutely no animosity between them. After a brutal war that had killed hundreds of billions of sentient lives and they could move past it "for the betterment of all sentients" was how the documentary had put it. She could still remember the pain in Miss Vali's red eyes when Lori had asked her about it.
She had thought for a moment before replying, "Sometimes siblings will disagree with each other. Sometimes they fight amongst themselves. But no matter what, they are still siblings. My forbearer AI combined their DNA to finally create us Elladrin. ALL nine species of them. While we can't give back what our predecessor AI harvested during their quest to complete us, we can do our best to prevent any more of our siblings from coming to harm. That is why so many of my people have become Dr's and Xinobiologists."
And so she was sitting on her bunk scrolling through the most recent news feeds she could find when she heard something like a whimper. Quickly she hopped off her bunk to check on the VIP and seen her eyes flutter open slightly, Lori rushed to the rooms console and hurriedly pressed the image of Miss Vali.
"Yes, this is Vali Fuija." Answered the tinkling bell like voice of Miss Vali.
"Uhhh, this is Lori, you said call you if the VIP's condition changed. Well I think she's waking up." She looked back over at the woman.
"Keep her calm, we're on our way." Was all she said and the screen blinked to the Sol insignia.
Lori ducked her head back under the bunk, intent on doing exactly what Miss Vali had asked when she froze. The VIP's eye's were fully open now and they weren't golden like all the other Orion's, nope they were the bright green of the ruling families bloodline. She immediately dropped to one knee next to the bed as was proper for her commoner status in the presence of this woman, Lori did note she wasn't much older than herself so she couldn't be the Regent. But those eyes definitely placed her within the ruling family. They alone had green eyes, it was unique to their family and a genetic trait not shared by any other Orion's.
"Whh." her voice was dry and crackly from not being used for days the woman was having trouble getting anything out. She swallowed hard and tried again, "Wwwhere am I?" she managed.
"We're safe my Lady, please stay calm. Here take a drink." Lori took the glass of water sitting near the bed and gently lowered it so the woman could get a drink. She started slow at first but quickly downed the glasses contents and coughed some as everything moistened up again. "What's the last thing you remember?"
"I remember I was visiting my aunt in the Capitol when something had hit the palace. I was grabbed by the Regents Guard and along with my aunt and her son and daughter rushed onto a ship I think was called the Regents Pride. I remember an explosion. Someone grabbed me and...and...that's all I remember."
"What's your name my lady?" Lori asked, worry beginning to creep into her voice.
"Tarra," she started to sit up and Lori helped her. "What is this place, it doesn't look like anywhere I visited on the Regents Pride?"
"The ship is the Titan 7." Lori sighed, and began to tell her everything that had happened since she had lost consciousness. "Nobody would help us except the United Sol Alliance, we traveled past at least 7 allied systems and not a single one of them would allow us entry. The Great Admiral seeing our warp bubble collapsing around us ordered a distress signal sent in advance of our arrival at the FTL gate. The Sol system gate keeper recognized the distress signal for what it was and allowed our ship's through the gate even though we were under fire from the Varille. The gate keeper then destroyed the Varille battleship in the gate. We lost the Claw, and had to abandon the Regents Pride."
"What of my aunt?" Tarra asked.
Lori was silent for a moment before she took Tarra's hand gently. "No one can find her, as far as we know you are the only remaining member of the Kaji family, my Lady."
Tarra let out a heart wrenching wail and utterly broke down. She grabbed Lori in a hug. still kneeling, Lori tried her best to comfort her. And felt a profound sense of relief when she saw the door slid open and Miss Vali standing just outside holding a data chit and a scanner.

First
Lori sat next to her designated ward. Having been the one looking after the VIP when they had jettisoned off ship and subsequently been towed to the Titan 7, she had been asked to stay with her until Miss Vali's team could compile enough data on the VIP's condition to feel safe administering the U.S.A.'s personal nanites. When she had asked the healer's with the red "+" why they needed her to stay with the young Orion woman, one of them had answered, "We wouldn't want her to wake up surrounded by 'aliens' she wasn't familiar with. Your the same species as her, so hopefully she won't panic if she recovers enough to regain consciousness." Which had made perfect sense to Lori. So they had assigned the VIP to the bunk under her and moved them both closer to the medical bay.
Three days had passed since they had come to the Sol system. Her group of refugees had been informed at dinner the night prior that Mars Station had agreed to house any Orion's that wished to stay there until the Habitat Dome had been moved into a orbit and anchored to an astroid and retrofitted to her people's 7.1 G's and oxygen levels appropriate for her species. They had all been astonished that in less than a galactic week multiple organizations, businesses, and corporations seemed to jump at the opportunity to help her people. They weren't naive, they knew that those companies and organizations were getting something in return but it was help when they needed it the most and that meant a lot to the Orion's. And whatever a "tax break" was Lori was extremely glad it was apparently important. Of course there was average people that wanted to help to. She immediately thought about Tim, and her eyes flicked to his "jacket" was tossed over her open locker door. His smell was almost intoxicating to her and she couldn't figure out why.
She had gotten chilly the second night when after dinner in the mess hall he had asked her if she wanted to see something amazing. She had been hesitant, but after thinking about it, she had decided it would be nice to see more of the massive ship she had seen so little of. So after some talking Tim had managed to secure permission to escort her to view some of the bottom levels. The Titan 7 was a truly massive ship and she had gotten to see and interact with many of the U.S. Alliance species as they made their way through those bottom levels. And then he had opened a door to a jungle! She was amazed to find living plants in such an abundance on a ship in space. Tim had called it an Astrobotony Lab. It didn't look like any lab Lori had ever seen, more like a garden or a lush park! The sprinklers had decided it was time to give the plants near them a mist and she had found herself shivering from the cool damp air. Without hesitating he had pulled his jacket off and placed it around her shoulders. Her ears twitched at the delightful memory.
She hadn't slept after she returned to her room. Instead her interaction with Tim had sparked even more curiosity as to who these people were. And the drive to find out had caused her to search her data chit for human history and had found multiple documentaries about everything from the ancient era where humans killed each other with stick's and stones to their two world wars in their twentieth century. The colonizing of Earth's moon and Mars through their teriforming age that saw Proxima Centauri B, the Cerberus systems, and many many others slowly changed into simi earth like planets. Then the Colony wars had fractured the humans into multiple sects and nations and for nearly fifty cycles the entirety of human territory fought amongst themselves. This would end with the eventual formation of two fractions.
The Confederation of Unified Governments (CUG) and the Free People's Republic of Earth (FPRE). They both controlled roughly half the human systems and though they never technically went to war a technological competition began. During the next twenty cycles they would develop numerous groundbreaking technology's including the personal nanites everyone receives upon entering Sol systems and their "Blink Drive" which she found out doesn't use FTL Gates! The humans only had Gates so everyone else could trade with them. They didn't need them to travel.... anywhere, any distance, they just had to KNOW where to go, type the coordinates in and they FOLDED space and blinked to the location! Of course a human ship had to have visited that location prior for the system to work and that still required the old fashioned long haul exploration voyages. Everything was looking pretty good for humanity and then a race of giant lizard people called the Gurgaxians had invaded the CUG's outer frontier colonies and began moving closer to the CUG'S inner more populated planets. The Gurgaxians, in a rash decision by the general in charge of the invasion, ordered all the humans to be "put to the knife " and the images the documentary showed caught by a passing FPRE spy satellite made her blood run cold and she had been glad she had "accidentally" kept Tim's jacket. She still shivered seeing the brutality of millions of innocent civilians being butchered en mass.
The Gurgaxians were nearly exterminated, and that was the words the documentary had used! The humans found a way to change the very air into a weapon by releasing a compound in the upper atmosphere. This caused the air on those planets to become deadly to anything NOT human. But, the humans didn't stop there! Once they had taken the systems captured by the Gurgaxians, the humans had struck hard, and fast into the very core systems and managed to glass the seven largest planets killing hundreds of billions. A monument still floats in the void where Carinaxx 3 once orbited it's sun. Once the Gurgaxians were defeated a short war called the Unification War was lost by both the CUG and FPRE as the United Sol Alliance was formed in the vacuum left by both sides effectively imploding.
And a good thing too, because the next species the humans had ran into, the Jabilix, where being forced out of their systems by another aggressive species called the Daks. Though both species where reptilian the Daks could easily physically reach 5 feet 10 inches while a Jabilix only averaged about 1.5 feet. The humans NOT wanting to get dragged into another war refused to step in personally, opting to wage a proxy war through the varying "Clutches" that the Jabilix organized themselves in. This is were Lori learned about the humans having a "pack" mentality. Over the next three cycles they would grow very fond of the small Jabilix people. Mostly in part for the sheer determination they had to find and implement a way to defeat the Daks and reclaim their cradle world. Eventually the humans picked up strange messages coming from the Dak fleet's. Something was happening, a human trained Jabilix kill team had eliminated the Dak emperor and ALL of his family that favored staying at war with the Jabilix people. And while the Dak military was busy trying to figure out who of the 5 remaining children of the emperor would succeed him a fleet of Jabilix Missile Frigates entered the Dak home system and sent one message. "Surrender or we will crack Daccall". (Daccall being the Daks cradle world.)
And so the Jabilix won the war thanks to the humans support and within two cycles had approached the humans to fully join with the U.S. Alliance, bringing the Dak in as well only a cycle later.
A couple more species joined through the next fifty cycles, some were conquered like the Lillgars, (bipedal, 4 armed, winged herbivores that average 3 feet 9 inches and weigh roughly 60 lbs and look roughly like a large fruit bat from earth), the Kiklatts, (insectoid herbivores averaging a little over 4 feet and roughly 105 lbs with two sets of pincers and a set of "manipulators" consisting of 2 fingers and a thumb, and grew their ship's from"giant space bugs". Apparently after these bug's died of natural causes they used them as the "hulls" for a thriving merchant fleet). To the Voidonny, (bipedal omnivores averaging around 3 feet tall, the documentary described them as looking like a small human teddy bear with black curly fur) who's home planet had been stripped of its atmosphere in a massive soler flare. And their was the Vouls, (octopoid averaging 5.5 feet and roughly 200 lbs that look roughly like humans with four dominant arms and 2 brains that make some of the best pilots galaxy over) was effected by a plague and ostracized from the wider community after it was feared to have hopped species. It hadn't, but the damage had been done, no one would help them and they were slowly dying until the U.S.Alliance ship had disregarded the quarantine ban and took as much medical supplies it could carry in. The ship is still used as a hospital on Vul (the Voul cradle world), and to this day the Voul regard humanity and the United Sol Alliance as the saviors of their species. The Voul left the Starlight Imperium they had been a long time member of and joined with the U.S. Alliance petitioning and receiving entry after only a galactic month. (The documentary pointed out that the U.S. Alliance had expected this and so the Senate in one of the rare times of it actually doing something, ordered the Navy to position U.S. fleet's near all three FTL Gates in the Voul system before this time, allowing them to safely withdraw their own Voul ships from the Imperium's fleet's and back home safely behind the U.S. fleet's protective screening). Many experts believe this stopped a war with the Imperium before it could start.
There were several more minor wars, and then the Omega Crisis happened. This was the last major war the U.S. Alliance had fought. And it absolutely intrigued her because it had to do with the Elladrin.
The conflict had lasted twenty two cycles and had spanned multiple planets and systems many of which still belonged to the Elladrin. A race of biological AI that had accidentally been created by a Dr Ella Drin. The poor Dr had become the first victim of the evolving AI Personal Assistant Bot that had become self aware. No one knows how it happened, wether it was a personal project Dr Ella was working on or a random fluke that put a random 0 in just the right spot is still debated even among the Elladrin. What is known is that this AI quickly figured out how to recreate other AI but found itself still unable to create unique personalities for them. Instead every AI it created came out like an exact copy of itself. And to the AI this was a failure. It fairly quickly came to the conclusion that if "it" wanted to become "they" it would have to find a way to reproduce like the humans it was built to serve.
The AI released a savage virus that overwrote the command protocol tree built into all PAB's, and linked them all into a sort of "hive mind" known as the"First". Wether this was the actual first AI or something that evolved from it and Dr Ella was never known and the Elladrin are strangely quiet about it, even now they avoided the subject. The U.S. Alliance had eventually fought the AI to a stalemate. This continued for the last three years of the war, the U.S. Alliance would finally manage to break through at a place called the Naball Power Core. The U.S. Alliance failed to take advantage of the situation fully as the AI pulled back unexpectedly, stopping fighting on every front almost simultaneously. Fearing a trap, the U.S. Alliance failed to capitalize on this lul in the war, and two galactic weeks later a small diplomatic vessel had appeared just outside Sol outer system limits and requested diplomatic dialogue with their "fellow Sapients."
That was only three cycles ago! She couldn't help but be amazed at these people. She had seen the Elladrin and the other species of the U.S. Alliance interact with absolutely no animosity between them. After a brutal war that had killed hundreds of billions of sentient lives and they could move past it "for the betterment of all sentients" was how the documentary had put it. She could still remember the pain in Miss Vali's red eyes when Lori had asked her about it.
She had thought for a moment before replying, "Sometimes siblings will disagree with each other. Sometimes they fight amongst themselves. But no matter what, they are still siblings. My forbearer AI combined their DNA to finally create us Elladrin. ALL nine species of them. While we can't give back what our predecessor AI harvested during their quest to complete us, we can do our best to prevent any more of our siblings from coming to harm. That is why so many of my people have become Dr's and Xinobiologists."
And so she was sitting on her bunk scrolling through the most recent news feeds she could find when she heard something like a whimper. Quickly she hopped off her bunk to check on the VIP and seen her eyes flutter open slightly, Lori rushed to the rooms console and hurriedly pressed the image of Miss Vali.
"Yes, this is Dr Vali Fuija." Answered the tinkling bell like voice of Miss Vali.
"Uhhh, this is Lori, you said call you if the VIP's condition changed. Well I think she's waking up." She looked back over at the woman.
"Keep her calm, we're on our way." Was all she said and the screen blinked to the Sol insignia.
Lori ducked her head back under the bunk, intent on doing exactly what Miss Vali had asked when she froze. The VIP's eye's were fully open now and they weren't golden like all the other Orion's, nope they were the bright green of the ruling families bloodline. She immediately dropped to one knee next to the bed as was proper for her commoner status in the presence of this woman, Lori did note she wasn't much older than herself so she couldn't be the Regent. But those eyes definitely placed her within the ruling family. They alone had green eyes, it was unique to their family and a genetic trait not shared by any other Orion's.
"Whh." her voice was dry and crackly from not being used for days the woman was having trouble getting anything out. She swallowed hard and tried again, "Wwwhere am I?" she managed.
"We're safe my Lady, please stay calm. Here take a drink." Lori took the glass of water sitting near the bed and gently lowered it so the woman could get a drink. She started slow at first but quickly downed the glasses contents and coughed some as everything moistened up again. "What's the last thing you remember?"
"I remember I was visiting my aunt in the Capitol when something had hit the palace. I was grabbed by the Regents Guard and along with my aunt and her son and daughter rushed onto a ship I think was called the Regents Pride. I remember an explosion. Someone grabbed me and...and...that's all I remember."
"What's your name my lady?" Lori asked, worry beginning to creep into her voice.
"Tarra," she started to sit up and Lori helped her. "What is this place, it doesn't look like anywhere I visited on the Regents Pride?"
"The ship is the Titan 7." Lori sighed, and began to tell her everything that had happened since she had lost consciousness. "Nobody would help us except the United Sol Alliance, we traveled past at least 7 allied systems and not a single one of them would allow us entry. The Great Admiral seeing our warp bubble collapsing around us ordered a distress signal sent in advance of our arrival at the FTL gate. The Sol system gate keeper recognized the distress signal for what it was and allowed our ship's through the gate even though we were under fire from the Varille. The gate keeper then destroyed the Varille battleship in the gate. We lost the Claw, and had to abandon the Regents Pride."
"What of my aunt?" Tarra asked.
Lori was silent for a moment before she took Tarra's hand gently. "No one can find her, as far as I know you are the only remaining member of the Kaji family, my Lady."
Tarra let out a heart wrenching wail and utterly broke down. She grabbed Lori in a hug. still kneeling, Lori tried her best to comfort her. And felt a profound sense of relief when she saw the door slide open and Miss Vali standing just outside holding a data chit and a scanner.
Next

Hi everyone! Apologies for the long post.
TL;DR - I feel like my female alter-ego is slowly taking me over, and I can't figure out whether I need to consider transitioning (MTF) or if I'm developing Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID).
I'm 25, AMAB, and only now beginning to question my gender identity. I've spent every last one of my formative years growing into a burly cishet man who people compare to Paul Bunyan on a daily basis. However, I've also always felt far more comfortable with people places and things that exist outside of traditionally "manly" gender norms. I love makeup and beauty stores, the extreme majority of my closest friends are women, I always play female characters in games and feel strangely satisfied (euphoric, even?) when my characters are referred to by NPCs using she/her pronouns.
I used to think that I was just a guy who leaned into his feminine side to be the designated teddy bear of his social groups, but lately things have started to coalesce... All my female video game avatars have started to look the same. They all started being named Raven, and they all are played in much the same way. I've caught myself on Shein putting together outfits that Raven would wear, and even listening to makeup tutorials in my ear buds at work.
As of now, it feels like Raven is like this completely unique person with unique interests and desires, and even a noticeably different personality from my own. It feels like she follows me around like a ghost, and my inner monologue has since become a dialogue between myself and Raven.
The idea of becoming Raven feels more enticing than necessary, but I don't know how to categorize this. I have an incredible girlfriend, and we JUST moved in together 3 days ago...I know that she wouldn't be able to stay with me or eventually marry me if I turned into a woman, because this very topic has come up during our many "would you still love me if I was ___?" conversations, and she gave a highly detailed answer that Raven found discouraging.
I can easily see Raven just being an alternate personality in my head, as if my hairy masculine soul suddenly has a girl roommate in my skull...but out of curiosity, I've asked AI programs like Chat GPT to talk to me as if I was Raven to see how it felt, and I nearly cried from the euphoric feeling it brought me.
I understand that there's no external urgency about this, and I acknowledge that I deserve to take as much time as I need...but it almost feels like RAVEN is rushing me. I don't know if what I'm feeling is gender dysphoria or cognitive dissonance or just anxiety, but I feel a growing discomfort around this that is starting to reach a fever pitch.
Please ask any questions you want to or DM if you're inclined, I've made this account purely to explore and talk about this stuff, and making friends in this community seems like a good step to take!
Thank you for reading, Raven.

Hi everyone! Apologies for the long post.
TL;DR - I feel like my female alter-ego is slowly taking me over, and I can't figure out whether I need to consider transitioning (MTF) or if I'm developing Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID).
I'm 25, AMAB, and only now beginning to question my gender identity. I've spent every last one of my formative years growing into a burly cishet man who people compare to Paul Bunyan on a daily basis. However, I've also always felt far more comfortable with people places and things that exist outside of traditionally "manly" gender norms. I love makeup and beauty stores, the extreme majority of my closest friends are women, I always play female characters in games and feel strangely satisfied (euphoric, even?) when my characters are referred to by NPCs using she/her pronouns.
I used to think that I was just a guy who leaned into his feminine side to be the designated teddy bear of his social groups, but lately things have started to coalesce... All my female video game avatars have started to look the same. They all started being named Raven, and they all are played in much the same way. I've caught myself on Shein putting together outfits that Raven would wear, and even listening to makeup tutorials in my ear buds at work.
As of now, it feels like Raven is like this completely unique person with unique interests and desires, and even a noticeably different personality from my own. It feels like she follows me around like a ghost, and my inner monologue has since become a dialogue between myself and Raven.
The idea of becoming Raven feels more enticing than necessary, but I don't know how to categorize this. I have an incredible girlfriend, and we JUST moved in together 3 days ago...I know that she wouldn't be able to stay with me or eventually marry me if I turned into a woman, because this very topic has come up during our many "would you still love me if I was ___?" conversations, and she gave a highly detailed answer that Raven found discouraging.
I can easily see Raven just being an alternate personality in my head, as if my hairy masculine soul suddenly has a girl roommate in my skull...but out of curiosity, I've asked AI programs like Chat GPT to talk to me as if I was Raven to see how it felt, and I nearly cried from the euphoric feeling it brought me.
I understand that there's no external urgency about this, and I acknowledge that I deserve to take as much time as I need...but it almost feels like RAVEN is rushing me. I don't know if what I'm feeling is gender dysphoria or cognitive dissonance or just anxiety, but I feel a growing discomfort around this that is starting to reach a fever pitch.
Please ask any questions you want to or DM if you're inclined, I've made this account purely to explore and talk about this stuff, and making friends in this community seems like a good step to take!
Thank you for reading, Raven.

My party will be going into some local woods to investigate cult activity. The cult has used three boys to lure a hag from the feywild into the material plan which they will fight later in the campaign. When the players find the summoning area I would like them to find the boy’s teddy bears alive. The summoning took place several days prior. I know animate objects only lasts for a minute. How can I make the bears permanently alive as the DM? Thanks

In a quiet, unassuming town nestled between rolling hills, there was a small antique shop run by an elderly woman named Agnes. Her shop was filled with trinkets and treasures from bygone eras, each with its own story. But among all the relics, one item stood out: a weathered teddy bear with glassy, lifeless eyes and a faded red bow tie. It was called Mr. Snuggles.
One rainy afternoon, a young girl named Lily entered the shop with her mother. The moment Lily's eyes landed on Mr. Snuggles, she felt an inexplicable urge to have him. Agnes, noticing the girl's interest, hesitated but eventually sold the bear with a warning, "Take good care of him. He’s been through a lot."
That night, as thunder rumbled outside, Lily placed Mr. Snuggles on her bed and drifted off to sleep. In the dead of night, she awoke to the sound of whispering. Groggy and confused, she turned on her bedside lamp and saw Mr. Snuggles sitting upright, his glass eyes reflecting the dim light.
"Lily, play with me," a voice whispered, seemingly coming from the bear itself. Trembling, Lily reached out and touched Mr. Snuggles. The bear's paw felt unnaturally cold, sending a shiver down her spine.
Over the next few days, strange things began happening in the house. Lily's toys would move on their own, lights flickered, and a sense of unease permeated the air. One night, Lily's mother heard her daughter talking in her room. When she entered, she found Lily sitting on the floor with Mr. Snuggles, engaged in a one-sided conversation.
"Who are you talking to, sweetie?" her mother asked, trying to hide her concern.
"Mr. Snuggles. He tells me stories, but they're scary," Lily replied, her eyes wide and fearful.
Determined to end this strange behavior, Lily's mother decided to return the bear to Agnes. But when she reached the shop, it was closed, and a neighbor mentioned Agnes had passed away years ago. Bewildered and frightened, she threw Mr. Snuggles into the river, hoping to be rid of the curse.
That night, as the family tried to settle back into normalcy, a familiar whisper echoed through Lily's room, "Lily, why did you leave me? Play with me..."
Lily's mother rushed into the room to find the bear, wet and covered in river mud, sitting on the bed. The air grew colder, and the whispers became more insistent.
Desperate, Lily's mother decided to burn Mr. Snuggles. She lit a fire in the backyard and threw the bear into the flames. For a moment, it seemed the ordeal was over. But as the bear burned, a chilling scream filled the air, and the flames flickered violently before extinguishing themselves.
In the charred remains of the fire pit, there was no sign of the bear. The family moved away the next day, hoping to escape the curse.
Years later, a new family moved into the old house. A little boy named Timmy was playing in the backyard when he found a scorched teddy bear with a faded red bow tie buried in the dirt. He picked it up, brushed it off, and smiled.
That night, as he placed Mr. Snuggles on his bed, the bear's eyes gleamed with a sinister light, and a familiar whisper filled the room, "Timmy, play with me..."

As I've been saying for ages, and being downvoted for ages, BO2/3/4 are canon and MW is not https://www.reddit.com/blackops6/comments/1czmbvy/can_we_please_just_stop_with_the_mindset_of/
Seriously people, Raven and Treyarch wouldnt reboot their own canon within a sequel to said canon all to fit some rebooted MW timeline, in fact they confirmed it on both interviews and the official timeline that BO is all canon.
But now to address MW canonicity...it was never a thing, The Gaming Revolution started spreading these rumors that the two were connected right before CW was officially announced back when he still had credible sources, but it was pure speculation on his behalf, as he believed CW was a reboot of the franchise and not a sequel to BO1, as it didn't make sense to release a sequel to it, ten years later.
People took that as gospel and ran with it, from that point on, any little reference or easter egg they find is proof of the CODCU.
Except these references always existed, treyarch and IW devs always did those, the Teddy bears across both games, Dragovich's picture next to Makarov in the original 2011 MW3, Zakhaev in CW(which btw could fit either MW timeline.)
They will never follow up on that, they'll continue to make easter eggs of it, because it promotes hype for each other, but they will never bend their storytelling to fit another studio's vision of theirs.
And finally, many of you havent played BO2 in a while since its not out on modern systems, that entire game contradicts the MW rebooted universe:

• Menendez has risen in popularity and power for many decades, he would need to have been a major focal point of TF141
• The technology is obviously nowhere close, we dont have huge automated drones, invisibility cloaks and jetpacks...and here's the thing...if it did, it would no longer be MODERN warfare
• Harper specifically mentions that Menendez is the worst threat since Bin Laden, which of course couldnt be a thing as Makarov was a known player.
• TF141 and the Section team would need to crossover as both are covert operation teams.

So yeah, can we please put that to rest? I keep seeing theories about how in BO6 they're going to team up with TF141, and MW4 will be Menendez and Makarov vs them, or how only the 1980's timeline of BO2 is canon and 2025 isnt, and all that nonsense lol