The Context:

Silent Hill 2 is a 2001 psychological horror video game from Konami. A trailer was recently revealed for a remake of the game, with updated graphics and gameplay.
Angela Orosco is a character in Silent Hill 2. She is 19 years old, suicidal, and implied to be the victim of sexual assault by her father.
With the release of the trailer for the remake, some have noted changes to character designs and models — specially Angela’s.
Our drama begins when a user posts a screenshot of a reply to a tweet. The original tweet includes Angela’s redesigned model and a “non-woke” edited version. The reply tweet points out that the character is a 19 year-old sexual abuse victim.
Our drama spans over two threads as the new trailer and changes have sparked debate in the sub.

The Drama, Pt. 1

One user objects that the character isn’t real:

She's not real

so ?

So that's not a picture of a 19 year old abuse victim. The outrage isn't based on reality

it IS the picture of a 19 year old abuse victim FROM silent hill, just because she isn’t real doesn’t mean she doesn’t signify or carry a message from the real world

Silent Hill isn't real. The events in Silent Hill 2 never happened

[Continued:]

u really are close minded.. sexual abuse and people dying from diseases, depression, etc does happen irl

I never said that doesn't happen in real life. I said angela sn't real, silent Hill isn't real, and all the events that take place in silent hill 2 are a work of fiction, it's made up, it never happened.

Sure, but that's no reason to justify people reacting like they are. One cannot argue 'None of it's real' while also arguing 'these characters are important to me' or 'I want to invest in this series/game' because the point of the game is for you to immerse and invest in it. You're meant to care about the characters intrinsically, and not about 'what they do for you'. It's absolutely fine to be upset if some 15 year old idiot 'consoomer' whose first thought when he becomes upset about how a female in the game looks responds with "You want my money~! I am your demographic!" makes such an ignorant, room-temperature IQ take like this, and it's fine to let them know why.

I didn't say these characters are important to me. Real people who exist are important to me. People who get emotional about other people having opinions on made up characters must have some deeper issues. This is a subreddit for discussing a video game series, it's not Doctor Phil.

You don't seem to understand the concept of context very well

[Continued:]

The context is that you and some others don't like anything I've said because it hurt your feelings. I understand the context that you are implying, but I want you to find a way to say it before I go on

[…]

It's story telling, dude.

I say this with relief, but most people have not expirienced sexual abuse. Obviously, this is a good thing. However, it's pretty clear these days that empathy for people who have isn't wide-spread. The point of storytelling is broadening horizons, through different perspectives. It should not just be about catering to the audience.

Storytelling is that means of spreading empathy. There is value to the experience it has to share, and regardless of if Angela is real, the experiences she's there to portray are not without inspiration sourced in reality. If your argument is "She's not real. It's not real. Why care?" then you don't get the point of the whole of storytelling. Not just games, like, all of storytelling.

I just want to draw you attention to the OP's post, the original commenter in the image said nothing about SA, it's not mentioned instead the OP brings it up as a shield to prevent any criticism of the characters redesign. That's manipulation, and only an idiot wouldn't see it.

But what about word choice?

Calling someone a “fucking worm” is just as childish as the post they’re criticizing

if someone doesn't want to be called a worm they shouldn't act like a worm. even the engagement bait excuse doesn't work, it's gross behavior.

I would never call someone a disgusting worm but that’s just me 👌

lol ok snowflake
Boo hoo
it's very noble of you to come to the defense of some insane misogynist on twitter

No calling someone a worm is objectively hilarious tbh

”Vulnerable beauty”:

She was still the poster girl for the original SH2. Yes she was a sexual abuse victim but there was a certain vulnerable beauty to her that Team Silent/Konami wanted to convey in that iconic knife closeup shot as well as using her face for the actual cover art of the game.

"abuse victim"
"certain vulnerable beauty"
You actually wrote those two things together mate. Get therapy.

a lot of people who apparently have played and think they like silent hill 2 completely lack the maturity to handle any of the themes of the game apparently. angela's attractiveness should not be part of the discourse around her character at all.

A base level of attractiveness is relevant for almost all characters except Eddie. Thats the uncomfortable truth of human nature.
Attractiveness enhances a character’s charm. It enhances melancholic and profound musical performances, it enhances melancholic and profound movies. See Mazzy Star. See 500 Days of Summer. It wouldn’t have been the same if those musical artists and actors had unappealing annoying faces.

just because you are too shallow to empathize with people you don’t find attractive doesn’t mean everyone’s brain is broken in the same way man.

[Continued:]

This isn’t about me. This is about human nature. Look at the top YouTube comments on a Mazzy Star performance. They are praising her visual beauty. And we all know it feeds into the tenderness of the song. Nobody goes “Wtf is wrong with you- her face has nothing to do with the artistic value of the song!!!” You might call it shallow but it’s nothing to be faulted for. We are human.
Angela’s story is melancholic and profound. But Konami wouldn’t have made her the cover art had she been morbidly obese with a pudgy unappealing face. Nor would we SH2 fans hang the game poster of her on our walls if she was morbidly obese with a pudgy unappealing face. That knife pose shot wouldn’t have been nearly as iconic.
Saying all this stuff is very not PC. But there’s a difference between being bothered by the truth and refusing to accept it as the truth.

[…]

You misunderstand the term “vulnerable beauty”. You’re thinking about it negatively in terms of being taken advantage of. It’s not that. Im talking about tenderness and sorrow that is enhanced by natural beauty- and vice versa.
Go on YouTube and look at all the musical performances of songs about melancholy/ vulnerability/tenderness played by legendary artists. Like “fade into you” by Mazzy Star. The top YouTube comments are full of praises on her natural beauty. We know that aesthetic beauty enhances the artistry and vice versa.
Human nature tends to gravitate toward certain types of faces. It wouldn’t be the same if she had a derpy face. There is a reason why Konami decided to use Angela’s face as the cover art for the original SH2 game. Because her vulnerable beauty is a key component of her character. And her character is a key component of the game.
Even for James. The artistic value would be diminished if James had an ugly douchey and generally unlikeable face.

The Drama, Pt. 2

In a second thread, it is confirmed that this is the character’s final design.
DEI is blamed:

i vision apparently given by a DEI consultancy group named Hit Detection.

Holy shit you people treat DEI like it’s the fucking boogeyman. You realize that most games hire DEI consultancy, and they’re not some evil org pulling the strings changing the game, they almost always just check the game to ensure there isn’t any content that will unintentionally offend people?
It’s not some crazy scheme, it’s literally just checking that the writing has the intended response. It’s proofreading.

Because it is. Go actually read the ideology they are based of. DEI is the new fascism

Jesus, you have no idea what fascism means.
Just use pornhub man, this isn't something to go to war for lmao
You know, I was gonna debate you and use logic and sense, but the moment you threw out “facism” because it’s the buzzword of the day, I knew I’d be trying to debate someone with the IQ of a single cell amoeba

Insult to the single-cell amoebas tbh
Sure. Insult the person and not the argument.
Just so you know, I read most of post modernism general theories. It is amazing how it resembles fascism but just much better worded.
So, if you feel so insulted maybe go actually read the texts about DEI,instead of going hating on people.

[Continued:]

They insulted your argument too though. It's just the same basic rhetoric that everyone who thinks this way speaks. It's like you all subscribe to the same newsletter and read the weekly approved script. It's tiring and a waste of everyone's time, including yours.

Dudes never had an original thought in his life, if he didn't just parrot what the other incels say he wouldn't speak at all and the world would be all the better for it.

[…]

Or you could stop being incel
You didn't make an argumeny. You basically said "DEI is fascist go look it up". I looked it up ages ago when all these gamer dudes started scaremongering and it was the biggest non-issue I've ever seen. Like the whole SBI thing that got debunked fucking instantly. Outrage youtubers just found their new target to farm clicks, that's all.
User from kotakuinaction probably gonna link Jordan Petterson video if you ask for links

[…]

Just say the n word, man. We all know what you mean
Yup. People can stick their heads in the dirt and pretend these firms don't affect character designs but it is what it is.
Oh boy. Fuck DEI. Those people came to ruin games. The same way they ruined the other media.

There are allegations of gaslighting:

I cant with so many people gaslighting themselves into liking this design, OR the horrendous voice acting. So many of you guys are in pure copium mode right now, Just like with the trainwreck that is SH short message. This game looks worse and worse every time they show more of it, and everyone sticking up for the hideous character design and pretending the game looks good only because some of you compare it to the miniscule ps2 era gameplay of the OG isn't going to change how crap this remake's vision is. As someone who encourages people to take risks when it comes to remakes and reboots, I will be open minded. But it’s not looking good.

This sub is deleting any comments or posts that even slightly suggest there is something weird with how she looks. Her face does not look like a normal 19 year old girls and if you think it does your on some of that high dose copium.

People on the sub won't take any form of criticism, they'll just downvote you to doom. Her face is rather uncanny imo. I feel like they could've done it better

I don't mind being down voted. I've expressed my opinion and anyone who disagrees is welcome to express theres. What I do find amusing is the "you're just an incel" cope. These are supposed to be people against sexualization but make fun of other people's sex lives. But this is Reddit, so I'm not expecting anything better.

Comparisons are made:

I agree. If they feel inspired by Quagmire from Family Guy, then they should stick to their vision.

Bait used to be believable

I swear Silent Hill “fans” have to be the most obnoxious, I kinda see why we got nothing for such a long time.

Make Genshin fans look almost sane.

Denial used to be believable. Hit Detection worked on this game and that explains a lot.

”Hideous:

She looks hideous. Can't believe this is what Blooper is doing.

Trust me brother you absolutely look worse than her

Yet you don't know what he or she looks like.
Stand on business and post yourself then lil bro
Sad to see people lack the critical thinking to critique this game. Blooper gave this woman a man jaw and it looks downright ugly. How does a character model from 2001 look better than one from 2024? Goes to show how much team silent cared about their game while blooper is just trying to make a quick buck.

The Flairs:

• “the trend of uglyfying formerly ok looking characters just for the progressive checkmark”
  
• “you’re all shit with your toxic positivity”
  
• “if a female doesn't give them a boner then it's woke”
  
• “theyre mad cuz they cant nut to a trauma victim”
  

Hey guys, currently I am now 5 months pregnant with my 10-year relationship boyfriend, and he's a cheater. I caught him a couple of times. The first that I caught him, I just can't believe he would do this to me, because he knows that I am pregnant. I caught him chatting and flirting with another girl, and took note she was a co-worker. I forgave him at first because he said he would stop it and I thought that he's gonna change but I was wrong. All I was thinking about was the baby. A few weeks later, I found out that he hadn't cut his connection and relationship with the same girl, and they kept on chatting and flirting 😞 I was so down.
That time, I just don't know what to do l, I was overstressed and the baby. I wanted to break up with him but he didn't want to let me go. He asked again for my forgiveness and I was the martyr here, and for the second chance, I forgave him that I thought again he would change. I just want to have a complete and happy family 😞
Then another few weeks later, just recently I caught him again that time thru the deleted text message on iPhone. They were secretly seeing each other and with all those lies, I've connected all the dots with the same girl!!! He was so sweet and gave so much reassurance that I didn't know there was another girl. I begged him so hard to break up with me but he didn't want to and it hurts so much.
And now, I just don't know what to do if I should let go or stay for the sake of our baby. My baby feels so much stress coming from me 😞 He says that he's changing now, but I don't know how to believe him. I also told him so many times that I would go just for the sake of their relationship, that he should choose her and break up with me. But he still wants to hold onto our relationship, he doesn't want to let me go. I don't know why he's doing that, he knows that I am so much in pain right now because of what he did. I don't know if I am right thinking of making our family work right now or should I let him go. All I want is a stress-free pregnancy 😞

I (f20) went on a dating app and got dm from this dude (m21?) who was relatively good looking and seemed friendly. We chatted and I felt relatively safe as we were similiar in age and I got the impression of a friendly person. So we exchanged personal contacts.
But things felt uncomfortable as this person started texting with a more flirtatious undertone? (Calling me couple nicknames and cussing etc…)
I felt awkward after two days of texting as when asking about hobbies I got back answers that felt pretty incompatible with me.
E.g// What do you enjoy? ANS: Philosophy. When I mentioned nerdy hobbies I liked, the response was fairly off putting (Essentially saying that web novels were gay etc…)
Eventually I received a deleted message from a second contact (Which I ignored), idk maybe this dude was sharing my contacts?
I believe that mystery contact that messaged me was prob the same person as after ghosting I got responses like: “You blocked me? … I won’t talk to you again”. I didn’t block this contact and just deleted it, as I felt that was the right move.
After a few weeks another response from the unblocked second contact: “Hey fatty”.
Safe to say I made the final decision to block that contact.
I can see that some people can be bad at texting and that I over read situations. But I felt this person was pretty disingenuous. Which presents the question AITA? I think partially, but to what extent?
In general I was posting to get a better perspective of the situation from third parties.

Hello, I’m trying to set up a Docker mail server, but I’m having some difficulties. After the installation from the market, I’m unable to connect a client like Outlook to it. I can also not open the mailserver-admin panel that is shown in the market.
I’ve followed these tutorials: Basic Installation and Self-hosted Mail Server. Now, I can connect to the server, but I’m unable to send emails. However, receiving emails is working fine. Also i could not set up SSL. I used 143 and 465 as ports in the Client.
Every outgoing email seems to be marked as spam and doesn’t reach the recipient’s server. I believe I’ve correctly set up the DNS with the following records:

• A record: mail.myDomain.it
• Autoconfig: mail.myDomain.it
• Autodiscovery: mail.myDomain.it
• MX from myDomain.it to mail.myDomain.it with priority 10
• PTR from myDomain.it to mail.myDomain.it
• _dmarc with v=DMARC1; p=reject; rua=mailto:[myOtherMailAdress@sentMailserver.it](mailto:myOtherMailAdress@sentMailserver.it)
• mail._domainkey with v=DKIM1; h=sha256; k=rsa; p=

Despite this, the mail server is showing several errors. For instance, it discourages running Amavis/SA & Rspamd and OpenDKIM & Rspamd simultaneously. It recommends using Rspamd for DKIM checks and signing. There’s also a warning about SSL being configured with plain text access, which is not recommended for production deployment. Additionally, there are errors related to missing directories and files, such as ‘/tmp/docker-mailserverspamd/dkim’, and a missing decoder for .zoo files in amavis.
Could anyone provide some guidance on these issues?
Logs:
2024-06-01 09:55:53
[ INF ] Welcome to docker-mailserver v13.3.1
2024-06-01 09:55:53
[ INF ] Checking configuration
2024-06-01 09:55:53
[ INF ] Configuring mail server
2024-06-01 09:55:53
[ WARNING ] (Rspamd setup) Running Amavis/SA & Rspamd at the same time is discouraged
2024-06-01 09:55:53
[ WARNING ] (Rspamd setup) Running OpenDKIM & Rspamd at the same time is discouraged - we recommend Rspamd for DKIM checks (enabled with Rspamd by default) & signing
2024-06-01 09:55:53
[ WARNING ] (Rspamd setup) Running OpenDMARC & Rspamd at the same time is discouraged - we recommend Rspamd for DMARC checks (enabled with Rspamd by default)
2024-06-01 09:55:53
[ WARNING ] (Rspamd setup) Running policyd-spf & Rspamd at the same time is discouraged - we recommend Rspamd for SPF checks (enabled with Rspamd by default)
2024-06-01 09:55:54
[ WARNING ] !! INSECURE !! SSL configured with plain text access - DO NOT USE FOR PRODUCTION DEPLOYMENT
2024-06-01 09:55:55
chown: cannot access '/tmp/docker-mailserverspamd/dkim': No such file or directory
2024-06-01 09:55:55
[ INF ] Starting daemons
2024-06-01 09:55:57
[ INF ] mail.myDomain.it is up and running
2024-06-01 09:55:57
Jun 1 09:55:57 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[865]: starting. /ussbin/amavisd-new at mail.myDomain.it amavisd-new-2.11.1 (20181009), Unicode aware, LC_CTYPE="C.UTF-8"
2024-06-01 09:55:57
Jun 1 09:55:57 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[865]: perl=5.032001, user=, EUID: 110 (110); group=, EGID: 112 112 (112 112)
2024-06-01 09:55:57
Jun 1 09:55:57 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[865]: Net::Server: Group Not Defined. Defaulting to EGID '112 112'
2024-06-01 09:55:57
Jun 1 09:55:57 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[865]: Net::Server: User Not Defined. Defaulting to EUID '110'
2024-06-01 09:55:57
Jun 1 09:55:57 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[865]: No ext program for .zoo, tried: zoo
2024-06-01 09:55:57
Jun 1 09:55:57 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[865]: No ext program for .doc, tried: ripole
2024-06-01 09:55:57
Jun 1 09:55:57 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[865]: No decoder for .F
2024-06-01 09:55:57
Jun 1 09:55:57 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[865]: No decoder for .doc
2024-06-01 09:55:57
Jun 1 09:55:57 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[865]: No decoder for .zoo
2024-06-01 09:55:57
Jun 1 09:55:57 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[865]: Using primary internal av scanner code for ClamAV-clamd
2024-06-01 09:55:57
Jun 1 09:55:57 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[865]: Found secondary av scanner ClamAV-clamscan at /usbin/clamscan
2024-06-01 10:03:03
2024-06-01 10:03:03,788 WARN received SIGTERM indicating exit request
2024-06-01 10:03:15
[ INF ] Welcome to docker-mailserver v13.3.1
2024-06-01 10:03:15
[ INF ] Checking configuration
2024-06-01 10:03:15
[ WARNING ] This container was (likely) improperly restarted which can result in undefined behavior
2024-06-01 10:03:15
[ WARNING ] Please destroy the container properly and then start DMS again
2024-06-01 10:03:15
[ INF ] Configuring mail server
2024-06-01 10:03:15
[ WARNING ] (Rspamd setup) Running Amavis/SA & Rspamd at the same time is discouraged
2024-06-01 10:03:15
[ WARNING ] (Rspamd setup) Running OpenDKIM & Rspamd at the same time is discouraged - we recommend Rspamd for DKIM checks (enabled with Rspamd by default) & signing
2024-06-01 10:03:15
[ WARNING ] (Rspamd setup) Running OpenDMARC & Rspamd at the same time is discouraged - we recommend Rspamd for DMARC checks (enabled with Rspamd by default)
2024-06-01 10:03:15
[ WARNING ] (Rspamd setup) Running policyd-spf & Rspamd at the same time is discouraged - we recommend Rspamd for SPF checks (enabled with Rspamd by default)
2024-06-01 10:03:15
[ WARNING ] !! INSECURE !! SSL configured with plain text access - DO NOT USE FOR PRODUCTION DEPLOYMENT
2024-06-01 10:03:16
chown: cannot access '/tmp/docker-mailserverspamd/dkim': No such file or directory
2024-06-01 10:03:16
[ INF ] Starting daemons
2024-06-01 10:03:18
[ INF ] mail.myDomain.it is up and running
2024-06-01 10:03:18
Jun 1 10:03:18 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[852]: starting. /ussbin/amavisd-new at mail.myDomain.it amavisd-new-2.11.1 (20181009), Unicode aware, LC_CTYPE="C.UTF-8"
2024-06-01 10:03:18
Jun 1 10:03:18 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[852]: perl=5.032001, user=, EUID: 110 (110); group=, EGID: 112 112 (112 112)
2024-06-01 10:03:18
Jun 1 10:03:18 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[852]: Net::Server: Group Not Defined. Defaulting to EGID '112 112'
2024-06-01 10:03:18
Jun 1 10:03:18 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[852]: Net::Server: User Not Defined. Defaulting to EUID '110'
2024-06-01 10:03:18
Jun 1 10:03:18 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[852]: No ext program for .zoo, tried: zoo
2024-06-01 10:03:18
Jun 1 10:03:18 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[852]: No ext program for .doc, tried: ripole
2024-06-01 10:03:18
Jun 1 10:03:18 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[852]: No decoder for .F
2024-06-01 10:03:18
Jun 1 10:03:18 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[852]: No decoder for .doc
2024-06-01 10:03:18
Jun 1 10:03:18 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[852]: No decoder for .zoo
2024-06-01 10:03:18
Jun 1 10:03:18 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[852]: Using primary internal av scanner code for ClamAV-clamd
2024-06-01 10:03:18
Jun 1 10:03:18 3d63ce0a3d5c amavis[852]: Found secondary av scanner ClamAV-clamscan at /usbin/clamscan
2024-06-01 10:05:49
Jun 1 10:05:49 3d63ce0a3d5c dovecot: imap-login: Login: user=[admin@myDomain.it](mailto:admin@myDomain.it), method=PLAIN, rip=109.236.81.168, lip=172.16.0.18, mpid=1166, session=
2024-06-01 10:05:49
Jun 1 10:05:49 3d63ce0a3d5c dovecot: imap([admin@myDomain.it](mailto:admin@myDomain.it))<1166>: Disconnected: Connection closed (NAMESPACE finished 0.099 secs ago) in=57 out=568 deleted=0 expunged=0 trashed=0 hdr_count=0 hdr_bytes=0 body_count=0 body_bytes=0
2024-06-01 10:06:16
Jun 1 10:06:16 3d63ce0a3d5c postfix/submissions/smtpd[1217]: connect from 109-236-81-168.hosted-by-worldstream.net[109.236.81.168]
2024-06-01 10:06:17
Jun 1 10:06:17 3d63ce0a3d5c postfix/submissions/smtpd[1217]: disconnect from 109-236-81-168.hosted-by-worldstream.net[109.236.81.168] ehlo=1 auth=1 quit=1 commands=3
2024-06-01 10:06:18
Jun 1 10:06:18 3d63ce0a3d5c dovecot: imap-login: Login: user=[admin@myDomain.it](mailto:admin@myDomain.it), method=PLAIN, rip=109.236.81.168, lip=172.16.0.18, mpid=1221, session=<5/5PQNEZ8mVt7FGo>
2024-06-01 10:06:18
Jun 1 10:06:18 3d63ce0a3d5c dovecot: imap([admin@myDomain.it](mailto:admin@myDomain.it))<1221><5/5PQNEZ8mVt7FGo>: Disconnected: Connection closed (LIST finished 0.103 secs ago) in=93 out=746 deleted=0 expunged=0 trashed=0 hdr_count=0 hdr_bytes=0 body_count=0 body_bytes=0
2024-06-01 10:06:35
Jun 1 10:06:35 3d63ce0a3d5c dovecot: imap-login: Login: user=[admin@myDomain.it](mailto:admin@myDomain.it), method=PLAIN, rip=109.236.81.168, lip=172.16.0.18, mpid=1250, session=<2gBRQdEZZg9t7FGo>
2024-06-01 10:06:47
Jun 1 10:06:47 3d63ce0a3d5c postfix/submissions/smtpd[1217]: connect from 109-236-81-168.hosted-by-worldstream.net[109.236.81.168]
2024-06-01 10:06:47
Jun 1 10:06:47 3d63ce0a3d5c postfix/submissions/smtpd[1217]: 96BA336E04E3: client=109-236-81-168.hosted-by-worldstream.net[109.236.81.168], sasl_method=PLAIN, sasl_username=[admin@myDomain.it](mailto:admin@myDomain.it)
2024-06-01 10:06:47
Jun 1 10:06:47 3d63ce0a3d5c postfix/sender-cleanup/cleanup[1278]: 96BA336E04E3: message-id=[8DBF872B-16FE-477B-A6B1-4DF2DEB87A4F@myDomain.it](mailto:8DBF872B-16FE-477B-A6B1-4DF2DEB87A4F@myDomain.it)
2024-06-01 10:06:47
Jun 1 10:06:47 3d63ce0a3d5c postfix/sender-cleanup/cleanup[1278]: 96BA336E04E3: replace: header MIME-Version: 1.0 from 109-236-81-168.hosted-by-worldstream.net[109.236.81.168]; from=[admin@myDomain.it](mailto:admin@myDomain.it) to=[myOtherMailAdress@sentMailserver.it](mailto:myOtherMailAdress@sentMailserver.it) proto=ESMTP helo=<[127.0.0.1]>: MIME-Version: 1.0
2024-06-01 10:06:47
Jun 1 10:06:47 3d63ce0a3d5c opendkim[717]: 96BA336E04E3: DKIM-Signature field added (s=mail, d=myDomain.it)
2024-06-01 10:06:48
Jun 1 10:06:48 3d63ce0a3d5c postfix/qmgr[832]: 96BA336E04E3: from=[admin@myDomain.it](mailto:admin@myDomain.it), size=704, nrcpt=1 (queue active)
2024-06-01 10:06:48
Jun 1 10:06:48 3d63ce0a3d5c postfix/submissions/smtpd[1217]: disconnect from 109-236-81-168.hosted-by-worldstream.net[109.236.81.168] ehlo=1 auth=1 mail=1 rcpt=1 data=1 quit=1 commands=6
2024-06-01 10:06:48
Jun 1 10:06:48 3d63ce0a3d5c postfix/smtpd-amavis/smtpd[1282]: connect from localhost[127.0.0.1]
2024-06-01 10:06:48
Jun 1 10:06:48 3d63ce0a3d5c postfix/smtpd-amavis/smtpd[1282]: 2E37936E8458: client=localhost[127.0.0.1]
2024-06-01 10:06:48
Jun 1 10:06:48 3d63ce0a3d5c postfix/cleanup[1283]: 2E37936E8458: message-id=[8DBF872B-16FE-477B-A6B1-4DF2DEB87A4F@myDomain.it](mailto:8DBF872B-16FE-477B-A6B1-4DF2DEB87A4F@myDomain.it)
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Hi, I’m a ‘32M’ who has been talking to a ‘26F’ for about a month. We had two good dates so far. The ‘26F’ I’m talking with and I talked via Instagram on Tuesday; I booked plans for Friday and Sunday for dates. We ended up having another conversation on Thursday, and she asked when was our next date. I told her to refer to prior messages because we already discussed that topic. Then, she stated that she just got fired from her job; thus, her head and energy wouldn’t be focused on Friday or Sunday and said it was best to go out next week when she was feeling better. I understood. Then, communication started to dwindle. She had mentioned getting rid of her instagram, but prior to deleting it, she dm’d me her number and told me to contact her so she could have my number. She also said her phone would be deactivated briefly. We texted that day and for the next two days. Then, just like she said, she deleted her instagram and her phone was off for a bit. When her phone was back up (2 days later), she texted me and we conversed. I tried making plans with her but her mood was still not the best. We have had subsequent conversations but I noticed that her effort was declining; however, she ended up texted me on her own and apologizing for her effort. She told me how she feels stressed and under pressure and her mood isn’t the best due to her recent situation. I told her I’m here, and I’m glad she opened up; however, I’m really confused. She’s been honest so far and everything she said she was going to do or everything she said that was going to happen. To be honest, the lack of effort is making me feel unwanted and leaving my mind racing with possibly some unfounded theories. I’m not trying to give her more stress than she already has but I don’t want to feel unwanted either. What is a good way to handle/resolve this situation?

(thank you for reading all this if you do, and i’m sorry for the bad punctuation and grammar. And the fact that it’s so long)
dnd: do not disturb
I’m typing this on the verge of tears but i can’t do it anymore. Me and my gf have been dating for a year and a half. But we’ve been getting into arguments again and again for around a couple of months now. Mostly over her treatment towards me. Her lack of consideration for my feelings, the fact she never texts or updates me when i ask to, her never being there when i need her, her intentionally ignoring my messages and calls, or her just forgetting about me the entire day.
All she does is go to sleep and go home, she doesn’t work, she doesn’t have any friends she hangs out with, she’s literally glued to her phone at all times, has notifications on for all her apps, and never (until recently) started using dnd. So i ask her to do simple things and like “text me when you get home” or “send me the pics and vids you post on your story”, i for some reason have to bend over ass backwards to justify myself and i’m tired of it
Earlier today (the situation that prompted this post) I ask her on insta (after numerous attempts to even get in contact with her) to unblock me on imessage, since we were taking a break for a bit and blocked each other on there. Now i deleted insta a while back for a different reason, and specifically downloaded it back just to talk to her about this. So when i do ask, she asks me why.
Now with my gf, i have to go through 20 hoops to explain why her saying “i love you” first is different than me saying, and that she should tell me it first.
Now me, knowing from past experiences about me trying to justify things, tells her that i don’t want to argue and that it would take more time for her to argue her “point” than unblock me, so she should save us both the pain and just do it. After i say that, she says “no, you didn’t explain why”. So then i tell her “it’s so i can you if i need to” and she goes “what would you need to call me for”. Which absolutely baffles me because i’ve been struggling alot with different things lately and she knows this fact along with the fact that she is the only person i can actually rely on.
After that i text her more about it and we go on another tangent about how she’s started using dnd and doesn’t have me excluded from it, knowing how hard it is for me to get her attention in the first place.
The convo about unblocking me picks up about 3 HOURS LATER, where i ask her to do it again and she goes “you can call and text me on here” (referring to insta) and “why? what difference does it make”. I then remind her that i don’t even want insta on my phone and that the only reason i downloaded it back was to speak to her on this situation (and because the only app i can get her attention on is insta). Guess what she says! NOTHING! she leaves me on seen after my explanation and i try to get her attention for an hour after that (since remember, she didn’t exclude me from dnd)
She finally responds later saying “Drop it, imma unblock you”. The problem with this is that she always tell me to “drop it” whenever we’re in a situation where she did something wrong or didn’t do something right, and i’m confronting her about it for a long period of time, she begrudgingly does what she should’ve done, then tells me to “drop it”. Which i don’t even understand why she says in the first place if she’s the one who keeps starting this in the first place, and never actively listens to me or tries to change her behavior in any meaningful way.
I tell her that “You constantly ignore me and leave me on seen for an hour and keep me waiting all night, and exclude me from dnd, when i already have to bend ass backwards to get your attention in the first place, so stop telling me to drop it”
After that she says “You were talking about me unblocking you and i did it so we have no reason to still be talking about it, that’s why i said drop it” which just sets me off into talking about how i asked her 20 million times to do it even tho it should’ve been just once or twice and how it should’ve been 1 minute instead of 12 hours.
She then responds to me by saying “it just made no sense, why would i do something if it doesn’t make sense”. Which prompts me to explain my reasoning again to her for the third time. That it was simply just a personal issue that made me want to delete the app, and that i wanted her to unblock me on imessage, so i could contact her there. Now she uses the “it’s personal” card all the time with me when she doesn’t want to explain something, so i use that phrase to speak to her in a way she could hopefully understand!
But nope, she started asking me why, and i told her it doesn’t matter why, and that the reason i gave was enough, along with the fact i wouldn’t be able to contact her without it.
After i told her it was a personal reason and asked if my reason was logical enough, she said “Not really cuz if it’s a personal reason it’s cuz it’s about a person so you can block them or do whatever” I then tell her that i didn’t want her advice on how i deal with things and that she should’ve done what i asked when i gave her my reason and asked her nicely 12 hours ago at that point.
She then begins to say in response “it’s whatever now, you’re unblocked, so you can delete insta now”. I begin to tell her how i shouldn’t have to do all this but then she goes “i said it’s whatever now, delete insta, see you” and that’s the end of it.
I don’t understand why she’s like this. This is just one of a fuck ton of situations where she acts like this and it makes me feel like crying.
Please enlighten me on what to do for next time, and if you have any questions i’ll gladly respond.
TL;DR: My gf keeps being inconsiderate and stubborn towards me asking for things i’m allowed to reasonably ask for

(thank you for reading all this if you do, and i’m sorry it’s so long)
dnd: do not disturb
I’m typing this on the verge of tears but i can’t do it anymore. Me and my gf have been getting into arguments for around a couple of months now, mostly over her treatment towards me. Her lack of consideration for my feelings, the fact she never texts or updates me when i ask to, her never being there when i need her, her intentionally ignoring my messages and calls, or her just forgetting about me the entire day.
All she does is go to sleep and go home, she doesn’t work, she doesn’t have any friends she hangs out with, she’s literally glued to her phone at all times, has notifications on for all her apps, and never (until recently) started using dnd. So i ask her to do simple things and like “text me when you get home” or “send me the pics and vids you post on your story”, i for some reason have to bend over ass backwards to justify myself and i’m tired of it
Earlier today (the situation that prompted this post) I ask her on insta (after numerous attempts to even get in contact with her) to unblock me on imessage, since we were taking a break for a bit and blocked each other on there. Now i deleted insta a while back for a different reason, and specifically downloaded it back just to talk to her about this. So when i do ask, she asks me why.
Now with my gf, i have to go through 20 hoops to explain why her saying “i love you” first is different than me saying, and that she should tell me it first.
Now me, knowing from past experiences about me trying to justify things, tells her that i don’t want to argue and that it would take more time for her to argue her “point” than unblock me, so she should save us both the pain and just do it. After i say that, she says “no, you didn’t explain why”. So then i tell her “it’s so i can you if i need to” and she goes “what would you need to call me for”. Which absolutely baffles me because i’ve been struggling alot with different things lately and she knows this fact along with the fact that she is the only person i can actually rely on.
After that i text her more about it and we go on another tangent about how she’s started using dnd and doesn’t have me excluded from it, knowing how hard it is for me to get her attention in the first place.
The convo about unblocking me picks up about 3 HOURS LATER, where i ask her to do it again and she goes “you can call and text me on here” (referring to insta) and “why? what difference does it make”. I then remind her that i don’t even want insta on my phone and that the only reason i downloaded it back was to speak to her on this situation (and because the only app i can get her attention on is insta). Guess what she says! NOTHING! she leaves me on seen after my explanation and i try to get her attention for an hour after that (since remember, she didn’t exclude me from dnd)
She finally responds later saying “Drop it, imma unblock you”. The problem with this is that she always tell me to “drop it” whenever we’re in a situation where she did something wrong or didn’t do something right, and i’m confronting her about it for a long period of time, she begrudgingly does what she should’ve done, then tells me to “drop it”. Which i don’t even understand why she says in the first place if she’s the one who keeps starting this in the first place, and never actively listens to me or tries to change her behavior in any meaningful way.
I tell her that “You constantly ignore me and leave me on seen for an hour and keep me waiting all night, and exclude me from dnd, when i already have to bend ass backwards to get your attention in the first place, so stop telling me to drop it”
After that she says “You were talking about me unblocking you and i did it so we have no reason to still be talking about it, that’s why i said drop it” which just sets me off into talking about how i asked her 20 million times to do it even tho it should’ve been just once or twice and how it should’ve been 1 minute instead of 12 hours.
She then responds to me by saying “it just made no sense, why would i do something if it doesn’t make sense”. Which prompts me to explain my reasoning again to her for the third time. That it was simply just a personal issue that made me want to delete the app, and that i wanted her to unblock me on imessage, so i could contact her there. Now she uses the “it’s personal” card all the time with me when she doesn’t want to explain something, so i use that phrase to speak to her in a way she could hopefully understand!
But nope, she started asking me why, and i told her it doesn’t matter why, and that the reason i gave was enough, along with the fact i wouldn’t be able to contact her without it.
After i told her it was a personal reason and asked if my reason was logical enough, she said “Not really cuz if it’s a personal reason it’s cuz it’s about a person so you can block them or do whatever” I then tell her that i didn’t want her advice on how i deal with things and that she should’ve done what i asked when i gave her my reason and asked her nicely 12 hours ago at that point.
She then begins to say in response “it’s whatever now, you’re unblocked, so you can delete insta now”. I begin to tell her how i shouldn’t have to do all this but then she goes “i said it’s whatever now, delete insta, see you” and that’s the end of it.
I don’t understand why she’s like this. This is just one of a fuck ton of situations where she acts like this and it makes me feel like crying.
Please enlighten me on what to do for next time, and if you have any questions i’ll gladly respond.
TL;DR: My gf keeps being inconsiderate and stubborn towards me asking for things i’m allowed to reasonably ask for

(thank you for reading all this if you do, and i’m sorry it’s so long)
dnd: do not disturb
I’m typing this on the verge of tears but i can’t do it anymore. Me and my gf have been getting into arguments for around a couple of months now, mostly over her treatment towards me. Her lack of consideration for my feelings, the fact she never texts or updates me when i ask to, her never being there when i need her, her intentionally ignoring my messages and calls, or her just forgetting about me the entire day.
All she does is go to sleep and go home, she doesn’t work, she doesn’t have any friends she hangs out with, she’s literally glued to her phone at all times, has notifications on for all her apps, and never (until recently) started using dnd. So i ask her to do simple things and like “text me when you get home” or “send me the pics and vids you post on your story”, i for some reason have to bend over ass backwards to justify myself and i’m tired of it
Earlier today (the situation that prompted this post) I ask her on insta (after numerous attempts to even get in contact with her) to unblock me on imessage, since we were taking a break for a bit and blocked each other on there. Now i deleted insta a while back for a different reason, and specifically downloaded it back just to talk to her about this. So when i do ask, she asks me why.
Now with my gf, i have to go through 20 hoops to explain why her saying “i love you” first is different than me saying, and that she should tell me it first.
Now me, knowing from past experiences about me trying to justify things, tells her that i don’t want to argue and that it would take more time for her to argue her “point” than unblock me, so she should save us both the pain and just do it. After i say that, she says “no, you didn’t explain why”. So then i tell her “it’s so i can you if i need to” and she goes “what would you need to call me for”. Which absolutely baffles me because i’ve been struggling alot with different things lately and she knows this fact along with the fact that she is the only person i can actually rely on.
After that i text her more about it and we go on another tangent about how she’s started using dnd and doesn’t have me excluded from it, knowing how hard it is for me to get her attention in the first place.
The convo about unblocking me picks up about 3 HOURS LATER, where i ask her to do it again and she goes “you can call and text me on here” (referring to insta) and “why? what difference does it make”. I then remind her that i don’t even want insta on my phone and that the only reason i downloaded it back was to speak to her on this situation (and because the only app i can get her attention on is insta). Guess what she says! NOTHING! she leaves me on seen after my explanation and i try to get her attention for an hour after that (since remember, she didn’t exclude me from dnd)
She finally responds later saying “Drop it, imma unblock you”. The problem with this is that she always tell me to “drop it” whenever we’re in a situation where she did something wrong or didn’t do something right, and i’m confronting her about it for a long period of time, she begrudgingly does what she should’ve done, then tells me to “drop it”. Which i don’t even understand why she says in the first place if she’s the one who keeps starting this in the first place, and never actively listens to me or tries to change her behavior in any meaningful way.
I tell her that “You constantly ignore me and leave me on seen for an hour and keep me waiting all night, and exclude me from dnd, when i already have to bend ass backwards to get your attention in the first place, so stop telling me to drop it”
After that she says “You were talking about me unblocking you and i did it so we have no reason to still be talking about it, that’s why i said drop it” which just sets me off into talking about how i asked her 20 million times to do it even tho it should’ve been just once or twice and how it should’ve been 1 minute instead of 12 hours.
She then responds to me by saying “it just made no sense, why would i do something if it doesn’t make sense”. Which prompts me to explain my reasoning again to her for the third time. That it was simply just a personal issue that made me want to delete the app, and that i wanted her to unblock me on imessage, so i could contact her there. Now she uses the “it’s personal” card all the time with me when she doesn’t want to explain something, so i use that phrase to speak to her in a way she could hopefully understand!
But nope, she started asking me why, and i told her it doesn’t matter why, and that the reason i gave was enough, along with the fact i wouldn’t be able to contact her without it.
After i told her it was a personal reason and asked if my reason was logical enough, she said “Not really cuz if it’s a personal reason it’s cuz it’s about a person so you can block them or do whatever” I then tell her that i didn’t want her advice on how i deal with things and that she should’ve done what i asked when i gave her my reason and asked her nicely 12 hours ago at that point.
She then begins to say in response “it’s whatever now, you’re unblocked, so you can delete insta now”. I begin to tell her how i shouldn’t have to do all this but then she goes “i said it’s whatever now, delete insta, see you” and that’s the end of it.
I don’t understand why she’s like this. This is just one of a fuck ton of situations where she acts like this and it makes me feel like crying.
Please enlighten me on what to do for next time, and if you have any questions i’ll gladly respond.
TL;DR: My gf keeps being inconsiderate and stubborn towards me asking for things i’m allowed to reasonably ask for

Hello po, my nephew accidentally deleted a conversation sa FB messenger ko, it contains important messages and information. Is there anyway I could recover it. 🥺😢😭

Got dumped about a week ago. after almost five years together she walked out of my life. Not my first heartbreak but first real adult relationship that broke my heart. We had such a strong love and had so many memories and dreams together. I hate the way it ended. We left it as friends bc we both love eachother still. It has been a rough week since but i’ve been trying my best to accept it and be at peace with it. I’ve been tryin to stop stalking as it only hurts me. She needed space so i been trying to focus on myself but i find myself just writing and deleting messages in our text thread.
Ive been hiding in my room for days. I haven’t told anyone. i feel like im just going to cry and make a fool of myself trying to explain why. At least i asked my homie to hang tomorrow early. Don’t know how ima tell him or how he’s gonna react as our mutual friend but im hoping I’ll feel better.
My main anxiety right now is the fact that my big sis is having a baby shower tomorrow. my ex and her father were invited but not attending. At the party i’m gonna be asked where she is because we were pretty inseparable. I don’t know how to ask for emotional support from my siblings and mom. I think i’m going to be vague with the reason. I regret holding off on telling all of them what’s happened. I don’t want to bombard them with this tomorrow and possibly spoil their day but I also dont know if i can pretend everything is fine anymore.
What would y’all do? need some ideas on making this easier or maybe a short term solution?

OK so played a TTRPG online and stuff happened IRL that caused me to be away from it... bad stuff. While I was away the host deleted everything. I am looking to try and find a way to at the least get back the stat pages. Which would just be some archived of the HTML document of the page with the stats on it. Is there something that could help recover that from the computer or is that stuff not archived some where? I can see where all the pictures and stuff is archived but is the text from the HTMLs that are viewed not archived too? Or am I just SoL.
I really need that old text to get things going again with out having to do it all from scratch.

I 25 (f) am 24 weeks pregnant and in a semi-tumultuous relationship with my boyfriend 29 (m). To give some background, he already has two young boys of his own. So when we discussed accidental pregnancy before, we agreed we wouldn’t keep it until later in our lives. So when we found out I was pregnant, he right away did not want to keep the baby, but I was unsure. Ultimately I decided I wanted to keep the baby, but he spiraled a bit at first. He started drinking more to cope with his feelings surrounding the pregnancy, he was worried his current sons would see him in a negative light and at first blamed me for wanting to keep the baby so soon. After about a week, he apologized and got on board and things were good after that. However, in March, we got into a fight, he left me at home alone, got drunk and he reached out to a girl from high school. It was nothing crazy, just that he “thought” of her. But I found this out by going through his Apple Watch (wrong I know) because he deleted the messages as soon as I read them.
After that, we started going to therapy and things got better until recently. He’s a dismissive avoidant attachment style and I’m anxious, so any criticism I have he doesn’t take very well. Lately I’ve been going through a lot, we both have (school, custody, work, moving) , but I’ve been very anxious since the incident in March combined with whatever pregnancy hormones I’m having. Things were going okay and I decided to look through his phone a few weeks ago (again wrong I know). And I recovered text messages that he’d deleted between him and a coworker that were definitely flirtatious. I was devastated of course, even more so because he deleted them which meant he clearly felt it was wrong. Since then, things have gone pretty downhill to where he feels like I’m just constantly talking down on him and on my side I feel like I can’t say anything about being hurt without him being offended. There’s more context to our relationship and don’t get me wrong, I’m not perfect. But I just don’t feel like pregnant me deserves this and neither does our daughter. If we don’t end up together, I’m not sure I want to give her his last name. Both for practical reasons and personal. BUT I hesitate because even after everything I’ve said, he is an amazing father. He loves his kids so well and I know he will love her well too. So would I be TAH for not giving her his last name?

Among the many websites vying for visitors' time and interest on the enormous web, RiseCapital.store stands out as both mysterious and interesting. This website has many people curious about its real origins and the hidden workings behind it due to its enigmatic name and evasive online presence. This in-depth post will explore RiseCapital in great detail, trying to understand it better via its features, user experience, and possible consequences.

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Hello i am 18 years old guy from Nepal. I am currently studying Bachelor degree in science (chemistry group) in first year. Life was pretty normal. At 8th standard i discovered myself as a gay and at that time i didn't paid much attention to this . Then after completion of 12th grade, there was a holiday which was going boring as usual. So i asked myself why not to explore that community? . Then through social media i got to know about grindr which i download but there was nothing as i expected. Everyone was there for only physical intimacy. I'm kind of introvert person. I just wanted people (like me:gay) with whom i can share everything, understand me better and was ready to be in relationship too. But the i didn't find the one as expected so deleted that app and promised myself to stay away from such things forever. But recently two weeks before, suddenly the urge of finding someone who truly love me grew so intense that i could no longer control myself and again installed that app but i was banned from Grindr since i entered my original age which was year 2007 but the app restricts user below 18 years. Then after some searches, i found app named blued which was similar to grindr. Two days after installing, one guy suddenly messaged me. We talked a bit and with my sense i can feel that he was genuine and later we get connected to WhatsApp. After chatting for hours he said he wanted me to meet tomorrow. After thinking for a while i said yes. Then the day after he came to room. From very beginning i felt very nervous since i was in fear that what happenes if he doesn't like me or blah blah. I look decent but I'm lean and thin which is my biggest insecurity. After talking for hours we decided to ho out since i had to buy something from a shop . So we rode together in the scooter (which he brought) and had momos with cold drinks. After that we returned to my room. I swear i don't have any intension of hookups but he had . He approached me for kiss and then that thing happened. After that we had a very calm sleep together and at around 5 pm , he left for his home. Later that night he texted me and we again talked a little bit but from tomorrow morning i think i had fallen in love with him. I don't have any feelings coming from inside when he was with me. But now i had. He has a reputed banker job with 60 k salary which he resigned for abroad processing (Canada) and he was previously in relationship with doctor for 7 year's. Then,he had some work regarding documentation so he left for Kathmandu and our connection started breaking out. He left my message unseen for more than a day. He even seems disinterested in talking with me. But the more i try to forget him, more connected i feel.
I know he is very Senior to me. He has a well settled life and would be better in future if he moves abroad. He had his relationship with doctor. Even though he is 28 years old. He look like a guy of 23-24 years. Actually his standards doesn't match with mine. He belongs to a well to do family. And now I'm here doing Bsc whose scope is .....(You know) . But I'm falling for him day by day even though i try to avoid it. I know he doesn't like or love me but I'm unable to control my feelings, emotions.

Married
Hello, So here is my heartbreaking story that has changed my entire life. I've been with my high school sweetheart for 11 years. We have 4 kids together. Last year we decided to get married. Wedding was planned for January 2024. In Nov 2023, he picked up a night job to help with expenses. Long story short, he connected with someone there. They hung out after work and it eventually turned into sex. We were still having certain issues but we talked about it a lot. He was starting to have doubts and did not come to me. He went to her. She listened to him, they connected on childhood traumas, she looked at him in a way I have not in a long time. It was a fresh flame. Well he ended making the decision to end things with her because he knew she was not what he wanted and he chose me. (I have all the texts) She was not happy and became very emotional. Threatened to expose the entire thing to me if he didn't see her one last time. Well that one last time was a week before our marriage. He wasn't planning on having sex but she initiated and well ofc he didn't deny. He didn't have protection and she said it was okay because she was not ovulating. He's so dumb...he believed her.. Turns out she was. She even sent me a screenshot of her ovulation test that she took that afternoon before they had sex. A week later we get married. Everything is perfect. Our marriage is great. We our the biggest happy family. Skip forward to May 5th. She sends me very long messages explaining the affairs and now claiming she is pregnant. She told him a week before me. And she didn't like how he reacted to it. She felt like he didn't care about her. And that she didn't have an option when it came to the decisions he made regarding her and him. He told her he wanted nothing to do with her or the baby that he chose his family. She is claiming she wants nothing from him. She is only telling him now just because. She is so emotional, always crying, just wants him to go spend time with her. He reminded her that it was just a fling and he didn't want to be with her. She has terrorized me with untruthful things to hurt me. And now that everything is up in flames she is happy living her best life. He has apologized endlessly, has cried, pleaded, etc. He is requesting therapy. And is also looking into his own personal issues. I believe he is sorry. I truly am. But this shit has destroyed me. He reassures me every day that he loves me. He gives me space. He has lifted all my duties off of me to allow me to recover. He was like this before! But now it just seems different. How can we fix this? Even if the child is not around, and now he has to be financially responsible for it how is that going to affect us? Also, how could he not want to be there for this other child? I understand he hates this girl so much for how she went about things but I'm just at a loss. Anyways, thanks for reading my rant. And I will answer any follow up. I appreciate any feed back. I'm glad to get this off my chest.

Hindi naman nila mababasa.
I know you do that too. You type in with all your feelings and hit backspace or delete. I often do that. Bilang isang marupok na nilalang.
Here it goes.
I so wanted to text you so bad. Pero alam ko naman di mo na papansinin messages ko.
Nag-iisip ako if nahirapan ba ng ganito sa exH ko. Hindi. When I called it quits. I was done, done. This one is freakin’ hard. Urgh.
”See you when I see you.” ang asaran natin at pikon na pikon ako. Kasi ayaw ko nun!!! Gusto ko magbigay ng exact date, yung sure tayo. Pero mukang it will never happen again.
I saved the VM you sent me. Calling my name so gently. ”I know you’re just busy today. I just want you to know that I miss you and I’m thinking of you. Pahinga ka pag-uwi. Kain ka madami. Goodnight, Name ko.” kasi hindi ako naka message sayo for like 12 hours. Kasi as in busy. Yung sumagot ako pero di ko pala na send.
Pwede bang, take two? Three? I lost count. Pwede bang sabihin nalang natin na ”Oh tama na cold war. Bati na tayo.”. Sigh. I miss you so bad. 😭
Back space. Delete.

I am someone who is quite a sweet and effortful person. I would love an online connection with someone similar to me and have good, intellectual conversations and also share some laughter and affection. Affection can light us up and make us happy. (Even platonic connection is fine.) I like giving and receiving affection in the form of cute, little nicknames for each other, checking up on each other, asking about each other.
I hope my words sail to some worthwhile eyes on the winds of destiny.
I want to be hopeful and optimistic but the vast number of online disappointments make it difficult. Here are some things I don't want. Please don't contact me if you are not interested in reading the post. or do not want to talk long term and would be planning on ghosting me or disappearing within 1-2 days.
I have grown wary of superficial connections, no effort replies and even abrupt ghosts.
I would like someone with whom I can exchange sweet words with.
I am fine with a wholesome, platonic connection as well.
Our meeting seemed to dangle so much on fate, it's only fair we pay our dues. Give it our best shot. Do justice to the matchmakers of heaven - The directors of this romance.
I love bonding with someone through heart to heart conversation. Through exchanging genuine care and concern. Through passionate exchange of our interests and hobbies. Through clockwork logging of our daily lives. Through mindful curiosity in each other's interests. Through mutual preference for glitter over gold, depth over deception, charm over carelessness and symphonies over superficiality.
The conversation starts out with pleasantaries and outward introduction of our demographic information - the most rudimentary. The most formal. Gradually, the outer layers crack and a mild joke cuts across the mask and we're another layer deep. Common or different tastes in art are the usual social custom for making new acquaintances.
Soon, our conversation flows like a roaring river eliciting deep intellectual and emotional responses from both of us.
We're discussing prized memories and cherished fantasies of the future. Chalking out hypotheticals and admiring the other's world views. Pretty soon, we're suddenly bare and feeling a strong bond by virtue of what we've shared.
Small silences punctuated the conversation. These silences were not awkward. It was a comforting waterfall of connection. It was the silence that followed from both of us knowing and enjoying the bond created by our hearts.
I loved the feeling of ending a conversation with a stranger on the first day with the feeling you've known them for years. I harboured romantic beliefs that such a connection must be the byproduct of a relationship in a previous life !
Here are a few things about me -

• I love staying at home.
• I do not drink or smoke and don't like going to noisy pubs. Although there are times when friends or office parties are conducted there, it's something I just tolerate.
• I love reading. I am interested in programming, Mathematics, Chess, Science, Psychology, Geopolitics, Space, Literature (fantasy particularly or late but I like all kinds) and Self Help (Productivity and Positive Psychology) - and a lot more ! I'm generally intellectually curious and a lifelong learner.
• I love following updates on things I'm passionate about and sharing them regularly. I love following podcasts and blogs and videos on them and sharing and discussing them. I also love explaining a new thing I have learnt as it helps me understand it better.
• I tend to be positive and look at the brighter side of life usually. But I also like sharing the problems I am going through and like listening to your's.
• I love animals. I have a lot of pets. I am also quite close to my family and am surrounded by my loving pets (5 dogs and 4 cats). I recovered from dengue last month and they were always around me all the time. It felt very good.
• I love putting in effort into messages and writing effortful messages and generally use complete words and not much abbreviations. I love crafting a symphony of text.
• I am usually quite calm and supportive and remember things that are told to me in conversation. I like getting emotional and expressive and am soft hearted and sensitive. I am also quite mature and enjoy talking to similarly mature people.

Do not reach out to me if you're just bored, did not read the post, don't like anything about me or my profile or don't know what you want or don't want to invest in having a good connection or don't even have the intention for talking for a few weeks. I am already quite hurt at repeated ghosting so please do not even reach out to me if you intend to ghost by tomorrow or next week.
Here's what I would like from us

• Genuine interest, care and empathy for each other - Making each other a priority though we are strangers at first. That's part of the excitement in jumping head first into this ! That does not mean we do not respect each other's busy schedules or commitments. I'm looking for something really genuine.
• Regular effortful messages, and remembering things the other says
• I love sharing or explaining anything new I learn, whether it is a blog post, podcast, video, book or a general thought that came through my mind. It would be great if you love listening to good explanations and are interested in such things. I'd also love it if you too like sharing blogs or podcasts on topics that you are interested in but it's not necessary.
• I also love self improvement and sharing progress or motivation as we are doing things towards our goals and dreams.
• I love voice calls as I love the sound of voice. I would love it if you are someone who is excited at having regular voice calls (2-3 times a week) or at least exchanging voice messages at times !
• We don't need to have similar taste in art (music, TV shows, movies). I am open to learning about new kinds of interests and new subcultures !
• Openly sharing our thoughts on the bigger ideas and arcs of life and also venting about the smaller frustrations
• Being excited at receiving messages from the other person every time we light each other's phones up.

Also would be nice if we can just share photos so we can visualise what we look like as I like sharing photos when I go somewhere.

Currently chewing a blister into my cheek to distract myself. I am coming off being medicated for anxiety. I was tired of not being able to feel anything and the drowsiness I experienced being on the meds. I was on medication for a couple years so it feels like I’m experiencing everything all over again. I want to push through and find natural ways of coping. I can recognize that there is a lot going on in my life. There are like 4 different things happening tommorow that are triggering my anxiety, but I obviously can’t just turn off the tightness in my chest or the restlessness I feel because of the anticipation for what is to come. I often feel alone, like no one else has anxiety or the things I get nervous over are stupid and embarrassing. Like others would judge me if they knew what was going through my head, despite the things I get anxious over feeling very real to me in the moment. I pick important things or make things that aren’t too impactful super serious and like if I fail at something my life is ruined. I was so scared I wasn’t going to graduate high school, despite being a high achieving student and having good attendance. I send a text to a friend and then overthink it and want to delete the message because I think about all the ways it could be interpreted wrong.

in the beginning of march, the guy i have been talking to since november 2023, finally asked me out. everything was perfect, we were so close. we hung out all the time, essentially inseparable. he actually took my vcard two days after we officially got together. but 4 days after being together, we were hanging out after work one night. we were just in the parking lot listening to music and vibing until 2 am. i was the aux so i had his phone in my hand. something in me decided to check his messages, and that’s when i came across some person writing him long paragraphs about how much she cares about him. he takes the phone away and starts to read certain texts to make it seem like it was innocent. how he was just venting to her, but i asked to see the phone for my peace of mind. he eventually handed it to me where i then discovered him sexting this girl. while we were together for those couple of days; and the days leading up to it. even the day he took my v card, he was still entertaining her. all while telling me all of these sweet things. ive never been a situation like this before so granted i was furious and felt so many emotions all at once. he kept saying how sorry he was and how hes so stupid for doing that. and crying in my face. it was heartbreaking to see the guilt and shame on his face. he kept asking what could he do, he wants to be with me so bad. and it is crazy because i was always the type to say i would leave if that ever happened to me. i just felt so dumb giving myself up for someone just for this to happen. it was a slap in the face. i told him if he wants to be with me, he has to change his phone number, in which he did so in the matter of seconds. the girls i found on his phone were deleted and gone, so even if they wanted to reach him, they couldnt. i also asked him to cut his hair and go to church. in which he did both; and he still goes to church 3 months after that incident. he says it was a wake up call, and he wants to make things right. and to this day, things have been good and i believe he has made change and progress. but in the back of my mind, thoughts of him doing it again linger. and i am constantly thinking about the girls i found, to the point where i check their socials, and wonder what did they have that i didnt. i compare myself to them despite him telling me he only wants me. i just dont know what to do. am i wrong for still dwelling on that situation, am i in a way sabotaging what i have. thoughts ?

It's been two months since we broke up, and I have felt bothered by the way it ended ever since. I ended the relationship, but the truth is that I didn't want to; I felt compelled to due to the situation that was affecting my mental health.
To sum up the story, my ex had been avoiding me due to some personal issues she had been dealing with since the beginning of the year. It got to a point where she wasn't interested in talking to me, didn't want to see me, and even ghosted me.
I set my pride aside and tried to fight for us despite all of this because I understood her side. But after months of patience and seeing her drift away, when I tried to talk one last time, I got the classic speech that she was confused about her feelings and didn't see a future with me. After that, I couldn't take it anymore and felt obligated to end things.
What still bothers me about this breakup is that I had to do it through a message. She didn't want to see me, didn't want to talk about our situation, and in the heat of my emotions, I ended things via text, even though I wanted to meet her in person for a more genuine goodbye.
After that, I practically never heard from her again. After I broke up via message, she simply disappeared. She didn't even respond properly, gave me a generic farewell, deleted my contact, and left my life without clarifying any of my questions or opening up to me in the end.
Two months after the breakup (last week), I tried to meet her so we could have a respectful conversation about the breakup and so I could give her a sincere goodbye and deliver a letter saying farewell. I was ignored.
Honestly, I didn't want things to end this way. And I can never understand how someone who loved me so much in the past could treat me so coldly and indifferently in the end without explaining.
She was truly a wonderful person in my life. In the past three years, I experienced the happiest moments of my life with her and learned what love is.
But since last week, I've been starting to accept that I won't be able to resolve things with her and that I will never have my questions answered.
I think in the end not all stories have a closure.
I think I’ll just accept it and move on...

If anyone could give me advice on what to say about this situation or just their input me and my best friend would appreciate the thoughts of others. I’ve known my best friend who we’ll call April (18F) for nearly 15 years now. Back in August of 2022 right before our senior year she started talking to one of our close friend’s cousin who we’ll call Diego (16M). They started dating January 2023 and everything seemed to be going fine. However recently on one of her family trips that she brought him on she found out that he was flirting with this girl (20? F)and she would give him money. It isn’t some random chick either it’s his dad’s girlfriend’s daughter so I guess you could say his stepsister. He had apparently been doing this from October of last year up until January of this year. April never found out because Diego kept on deleting the messages he would send her. To make matters worse this was a girl my best friend expressed discomfort in so Diego on his own accord blocked her but when all this went down he admitted that he would block her when April and Diego would meet up then unblock her afterwards. There is kind of a lot of different things that I’m too lazy to get into so I’ll sum up what I think is important: 1) Diego would flirt with his stepsister so she would send him money 2) They meet up a couple times without my best friend knowing 3) Diego would block and unblock the stepsister so April wouldn’t find out 4) when Diego texted stepsister about it with my best friend on screen share she said something along the lines of you didn’t delete it and tell her the truth your not gonna make it seem like it was just me 5) Diego admitted that he liked his stepsister when April and him were together at some point in the relationship but I think he now denies this There is probably more that I just don’t remember but this is basically it off of memory. Also before any of y’all say flirting is not cheating we are not one hundred percent sure he didn’t do anything else when they would meet up so I just still put it as cheating. I don’t know if it matters but Diego is younger then us he is currently a junior in high school. To me the obvious choice would be to leave him but I want to point out that they are both very attached to each other and have a big bond I guess. I mean like if me and her are on FaceTime fifty percent of the time he would be on face time too but on another device. He was always invited to any family activity she had. They went to prom together, a lot of firsts together, so knowing her I dont think she would want to leave him. (She broke up with him already I mean completely cut off) I personally think she should leave him but I guess what I’m telling her isn’t really helping her in that as she is quite literally still texting/seeing him everyday (partly due to their jobs). So I’f y’all could give me advice on what to tell her or straight up give your opinions about it I would appreciate it. Also last thing I will most likely be showing her the comments as she knows I’m posting this and does not know what to do so if any of y’all want to leave something directly at her.

Hey Guys, first of all, sorry if I'm breaking any rules. I (M23) matched with this girl (F26) and we've been on 3 dates in the past couple of weeks.
The texting has been so smoothe and easy with her, we really clicked over the phone. In person, even better. She's amazing, pretty, smart, got her head screwed on. We share the same taste in music and are both nerdy about the same stuff
We have a lot in common and eventhough I wasn't necessarily looking to start a long term relationship - I feel like it is just so right with her. I've never felt this comfortable with another person.
The third time we saw each other, we slept together. She's an amazing lover and we share the same interests in bed.
I feel like this could potentially be the girl that I could marry one day. I just don't want to mess it up.
The past couple days she has been texting me less and I knew something was up, she canceled our plans because she was feeling sick. I don't know if she actually was but I will absolutely give her the space she needs and respect that. She doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to.
I'm going away for a reason that I cannot disclose, and I'll be coming back and forth between this city for about a month. Starting tomorrow. I wanted to meet up with her before I left so that I could tell her that before we met I was speaking to another girl, and that I've stopped now. The reason is that I want to pursue this new girl wholeheartedly and fully invest in and give this new potential relationship the best chance to get off the ground. Something along those lines. This would have also led to me finding out what her long time intentions are and to see where we stand with each other.
I asked her if she wanted to meet up today. She first of all apologized for not being available as much. And then wrote another message. She said that she's sorry to maybe make it sound a bigger deal than it is but wanted to tell me because she really likes me. She feels like we're moving too fast and "Doing small things and behaviors that me feel couple-y, when we are still getting to know each other, and because I like you, I'd love for us to slow it down a little". She then said that she doesn't want to be scared off for that reason and that she wants to see how this evolves.
First of all. I'm happy that she's being honest with me. Secondly, I'm more than happy to give her the space and time that she needs - especially if she wants to invest in us long term and "Evolve".
We've been out for a dinner, had a picnic on the beach at sunset - and been at my place for some netlfix. My question is:

1. What do I reply to this? This is the easiest thing for me to do.
   
2. What do I change going forward? What is "Things and behaviors that feel couple-y"? Wtf? Does that mean not having a romantic date in the beach? Does it mean not messaging you good morning? Does it mean not asking how your day was? Does it mean more time between dates? Does it mean not asking how you are when you're suck or offering to bring you something like a decent, caring human being?
   

I want to get it straight that I am more than happy to take it slower. But I dont know what that means in practice.
Here's what I was thinking: and I wanted to put my perspective at the end so that you could all make a decision before seeing what my thoughts are. I think that she wants to explore other people more before she commits to me. I feel like she wants to keep me at an arms distance while she looks at other options. I understand that we are in a dating pool and that there is competition. But for example: I haven't felt the need to go back to the dating app since I met her. The only reason I've been going on is to see if she's online there. And she has been. I'm not saying that she has to delete the app after 3 dates, but I would really like for us to be exclusive - especially after we've slept together. I honestly haven't felt the need to look at or speak to other girls that I have been speaking to since I've been seeing her.
What do you guys think?
Sorry for the long post :)