Main anak dara

Hi Ladies,
Warning bery long post ahead. But bery detailed naman.
Straight to the point na agad.
2 2 4 - 2day, 2morrow, 4ever
I want a RELATIONSHIP. I want to be LOVED. I want to feel SPECIAL. I want consistency. I want your good mornings and good nights. I want you to be clingy. I want you to be MINE.
" for so long Ive been wearing so many scars and all of them didnt came from my enemy. "
With that said,
About Me.

• currently living and working in NZ.
• Tats ( sorry if this is a red flag pero planning on getting full sleeves )
• Separated. Married status ko dito sa NZ meaning, dito kami kinasal. Pero divorce is legal here and we are working on it now ( divorce papers )
• My son is 11. And his with me full time. Full custody and sad to say wala xiang imik sa mum nya ngayon. Although Im always pushing for them to be okay. Sorry if this will be a red flag. But my son will always be my priority.
• I have a bad eyesight so im wearing glasses most of the time.
• I dont smoke. I dont drink alcohol. I prefer water 🙂.
• I know Ldr is hard and ma count lng ang mga tao na naniniwala nito. Pero mag iinarte bapa ako? Ito pa malala. Love language ko physical touch.
• Ive tried dating apps here on and off. Ive only been in a real date once.
• I overthink. And I have trust issues. Will explain below.
• Idk if this is a red or green flag pero I easily get attached.
• My red flags. I overthink. Im easily get jealous ( for the right reasons )

So to explain why im here.
Ive been Married for 9 years. Ive always been a giver sa relationship namin. Im not a perfect husband and I will never be perfect. But I didnt gave up. Umabot kami sa point na nawalan kami nang gana. We tried things para mag work kami lalo na may anak kami. But she still cheated. I can explain how if ever aabot tau don. But the main thing is, we are now living separately and my son is with me. And NO. We will not be getting back together. Ive done my healing already. And I dont wanna go back.
About you.

• just be yourself
• I dont mind if your shy to exchange pics, dont worry hindi ako pogi. Gusto ko lng makita ang face nang kausap ko.
• I dont judge kong anung past mo or current situation mo. Alam mo nman intention ko.

PS
Please Im already at that age na ayw kuna nang lokohan. And I dont wanna waste your time and Mine. Alam ko kong anung gusto ko.
See you in my DMs. Happy Friday Ladies.

Ang daming nasayang sa Encantadia, lalo na yung reboot version. Ang laking project na no'n e, na kung d-in-evelop lang nang husto e pwedeng ilaban sa worldbuilding. Humugot pa man din si Doctolero ng inspirasyon kay Tolkien.
Basically reskinned afternoon telenovela lang halos yung main story. May nawawalang anak, may agawan ng kapangyarihan, sibling rivalry, kabitan, yung mga tipikal, pero fantasy. Doon na lang napunta yung budget, tapos wala na sa ibang parts kaya kalamay na lang. Magulo ang history ng Encantadia, hindi sure kung sino ba talaga yung creators kasi parang may nabanggit na hindi sina Emre, Ether, at Arde talaga ang creators. May nauna pang triad, tapos iniwan lang sa kanila ang pamamahala. Meron pang god of destruction na halatang insert lang, pampahaba ng kwento. Hindi malinaw ang origins ng minority tribes tulad ng Punjabwe, mga Ascano, yung mga taong unggoy, pati yung mga taong crinkles. Wala rin akong narinig na explanation sa kung saan galing yung gate ni Asnamon, at kung sino ba siya. Yung gate no'ng mga taong crinkles na ang connection sa human world e matandang nasa tangle ng kung anumang, walang paliwanag. Poorly developed and Enchan, ni walang dialects at consistent sa buong flat world(?).
Side: Interesante sana kung pagpasok nina Amihan at Lira sa Encantadia e wala silang naiintindihan, kasi Enchan o ibang language ang ginagamit ng mga tao ro'n at kailangan pa niyang matuto. Para naman mas damage yung pagiging otherworldly ng Encantadia.
Hindi lang history ang may problema, pati yung locations. Puro gubat shots kung wala sa kaharian, camp, o ruins. Hindi na yata napondohan ang pagpapatayo ng maayos na fake town. Aasahan mong more on magic ang Lireo, tapos tech ang Hathoria at medyo mixed ang Sapiro, pero kulang ang indication na gano'n nga bukod sa higanteng gears malapit sa throne room ng Hathoria. Tech-oriented daw ang mga Punjabwe pero hindi naman sobrang kita.
Ang dami kong pwedeng i-rant, sobra. Napakalaking sayang ng kwento. Kung in-explore sana nila yung story world sa halip na nag-focus sa agawan kay Ybarro, okay sana.

Hey Folks, I'm going to start my read of MWSK and it's been a few months since I finished BLRW. I'm looking to get reminded on a few things from the way that the first book ended. Any help is much appreciated!
Firstly I'm trying to remember how Sogolon comes back (I don't think we are supposed to know that yet) and what Tracker's reaction is. Secondly, I'm trying to remember where the main characters go after Nyka kills the boy. From what I remember, the last we see of Sogolon is her crying while being buried, Bunshi has been killed (did Aesi kill her?), and the Aesi just kinda goes off into the distance?
Also, in general what was Tracker's sentiment about how the kingdom will fair now that Kwash Dara will remain on the throne? The Aesi makes the case that the kingdom will be better off united under Dara from an unseen threat to the west. He also mentions that even during maternal succession, the royal family was still perturbed. Does any of that land on Tracker?

Hi, new member here.
I am a graduating student, last night after I left our class's group chat, my bff immediately send a screenshot from the conversation. The whole class immediately laughs at me, even those people I trusted the most.
The first day of my senior high, I became friends with the half of the class. Ako yung pinupuntahan nila if they need something. Literally everyone in my class run to me if they needed my help. Of course I'm willing to help because for me, it feels good to help other people.
Semester after semester, I'm always the top 1 in my class. I joined any extra curricular activities I can join. But I noticed some changes in the last months of my Grade 11, my classmates became so distant to me.
Our school allowed students to wear anything as long as it's not indecent and showing so much skin. I always go to a classic jeans and white t-shirt. But every time I wore a uniform, I always wear high socks because I'm insecure with my knee full of scars. I changed my outfits in 12th Grade because I got inspired by the famous dancer in Korea, Bada lee. I tried different type of styles and outfits, simple double lining shirt and baggy pants.
The days go on, living my life in peace. My mom is one of the teachers so I kept my reputation clean as possible. Because of extra-curricular activities, I made a lot of friends outside my class.
"Anak ka lang namn ng teacher kaya nasa top ka" one of my classmates said in that group chat.
"Pa-high sock high sock ka pa, ano ka jejemon?"
"Pass sa high sock"
"Di naman bagay mga suot nya, ang laki laki ng tyan nya"
and more...
There's a lot of hate comments about me in the group chat. I shouldn't have left.
Those hateful comments didn't really affect me that much. Ang masakit lang, pati ang mga kaklase ko na tinulungan ko. Kahit mapuyat, kahit pagalitan na ako ni mama dahil lagi ko sila inuuna. Lagi ko sila tinutulungan kahit di ko sila ka group, may sinabi din sila saakin.
They slander me, in the main group chat of our class (our adviser was there). All of them were laughing at me. My adviser didn't care, seen lang sya sa group chat. Ang masakit pa, pati bff ko dinamay nila. Mama ko pinagtatawanan nila, yung tatay din ng bff ko.
"Kaya iniwan ng tatay kasi parehas sila mentally unstable"
That's when I realized, even the people you help the most will bring you down if you're in the top.
Kahit yung mga taong tinulungan ko hanggang huli, sila pa ang manghihila saakin pababa para makaangat sila.
​

Cred a fi ceva in apa. Unde stelele mai cad. Drumul parca nu te vrea. Dar la mine-n trup e cald. Verde fu si rosu totul. Ce pastel de maroniu. Unde-un suflet se izbeste. Si traieste prin pustiu. Vezi tu, astazi nu sunt eu. Caci nici ieri n-a fost sa fie. Dara maine tu cutezi. Sa raspunzi la nemurire? Trupul meu e rece, gheata. Mintea mea se lasa-n ceata. Parul s-a albit pe loc. Ochii nu mai au noroc. Dar tu, vii? Lacul despre care iti spuneam. Nu mai e, a inghetat. Totul e acum schimbat. Nu mai este cum il stii. Haide, vino ca sa vezi. Cum arata norii gri. Nu m-auzi sau ma ignori. Doamne, prea multe prostii. Gandu-mi zboara si se-ntoarce. Dara tu nu e sa vii. Te astept aici la poarta. Sa nu uiti unde stateam. Pe bancuta mea de piatra. Pe vremea cand ne iubeam. Sa privim iarasi la codru. Doamne, cat a imbatranit. S-a rarit si frunza toata. De cand nu ai mai venit. Uite-l si pe Azorel. Sta aici, e zgribulit. Mai tii minte cum latra. Si ce bucuros era? A imbatranit si el. Saracutu' a orbit. Insa el te-asteapta vesel. Nu uita cat te-a iubit. Mama face cozonaci. Tata pregateste focul. Te astept ca langa soba. Sa ne prindem iar cu jocul. Mai tii minte cum era. Drumul nostru catre scoala? Cum mereu ne bucuram. Si mai ramaneam pe afara? Astazi nu mai e asa. E pustiu si plin de gheata. Imi e frica sa-l strabat. De cand tot s-a-ntunecat. Dar cand ai sa vii aici. O sa mergem iar spre scoala. Si oricat am fi de mici. Frica n-o sa ne doboare. Acum hai, sa te grabesti. Simt cum mana mi-amorteste. Pleoapele se lasa grele. Vantul iar se inteteste. E un ger dar te astept. Nu ma voi misca de aici. Caci eu stiu ca vei veni. Pana urmatoarea zi. Mi-ai lasat si un mesaj. Cred ca tu l-ai pus in piatra. Scrie "nu te voi uita" Dupa ai mai pus o data. Sunt aici unde-i mesajul. Sa nu uiti ca te astept. Din gradina am rupt flori. Si ti le-am facut buchet. Acum simt cum dau s-adorm. Pleoapele-mi atarna grele. Frigul iar s-a instalat. Sangele-mi ingheata-n vene. Ai sa vii, asa ai zis. Nu ma voi misca de-aici. Te voi astepta mereu. Oricat ar parea de greu. Corpul mi se-nchide-ncet. Inima imi bate rar. Dar rezist pan-ai sa vii. Nu e totul in zadar. Pieptul parca mi se strange. Nu mai pot sa mai respir. Haide vino acum in graba. Ps: sunt in cimitir.

Hi, just wanted to get this off my chest, as I do not have someone na masabihan nito. I'm not looking for advice. Just mainly mapagkwentuhan lang. Please bear with me, mahaba talaga akong magkwento.
I (29F) have a gamer husband (29M).He skips from game to game, depende kung anong uso or bago. Alam naman natin na part na ng pag-game ang pagsali sa Discord group ng game na nilalaro mo or ng guild nyo, etc. My husband is the type of person na pabibo kumbaga. Pag may activity sila (di ko alam term, not a gamer), asahan mo maingay yan. Okay lang naman, as long as hindi tulog ang kids. So madami syang tropa doon, but they mostly converse via voice channel.
But meron syang ka-pm sa Discord. He's been messaging a girl na he calls "Ate" na kasama nila sa clan/guild nila. It's been fine by me since tungkol naman sa game nila yung pinaguusapan. Hanggang sa naging personal, about sakin, about sa life nung girl, about sa mga anak namin. Okay lang naman since nababasa ko naman. Nakikichismis kasi ako sa mga chismis nila sa Discord nila. Their discord server has "blind items" kasi, and kinukwento nya sakin yun.
Then si Ate girl, he mentioned kay husband na she's making a certain food na favorite ni Husband.. and papadalhan nya daw. So everytime na magchat sila, parang niloloko ni husband si Ate girl na uy nasan na yung food ganyan. He even followed Ate girl on IG, e di naman sya gumagamit talaga ng IG.
Last week, nagkaproblem si Ate girl kasi meron nagpaparamdam sa kanya na kasama nila sa laro pero ayaw nya kasi may kids yung guy. Nanghihingi sya ng payo sa asawa ko. Haba ng usapan nila grabe. Pinadala narin yung food na ibibigay daw. Excited naman asawa ko, akala mo di sya nakakakain nun periodically. Sabi ni Ate girl, wag daw isend ni husband sa server nila. Since talamak nga yung blind items doon, baka daw mablind-item sya na "babae ayaw ng may anak, pero gusto sa may asawa at anak" (her own words). At that time wala akong ibang naisip dyan.
Dahil nacurious nga ako sa laro, nagpaturo ako kay husband. Masaya naman sya, mejo tedious lang. Ayoko ng ganung laro, but I still check on my account from time to time.. and nilalaro din ni husband.
Normally after my work (my work ends 12mn) at tulog na ang kids.. nagkkwentuhan kami ni husband hanggang mga 2-3am. Yun lang talaga time na kinukwentuhan nya ako, since lagi syang nasa baba at ako naman laging nasa taas. Pero ako pag may ikkwento ako about work or any chika, bumababa ako.
Pero simula nung pinadala yung food, mga 2am na sya umaakyat,, so di na kami nakakapagkwentuhan. Since tulog ako ng morning, tapos paggising ko work na ako hanggang madaling araw, di na talaga kami nakakapagkwentuhan. Di ko naman masyado pinansin.
Napansin ko na lagi silang magkachat na ni Ate girl ng mga hanggang 2am. Everyday, multiple times a day. Minsan about sa game, minsan personal, minsan asaran. Inaasar nya si Ate girl na magjowa na ganun since 30+ na sya.
I felt different. Bigla kong naisip yung pagkaworried ni Ate girl na mablind item at malink sa asawa ko. And yung effort nya na makipagchat sa asawa ko hanggang 2am kahit may work sya kinabukasan.
I was not jealous kasi I know naman na di type ni husband si Ate girl. I just felt off, na he finds comfort in chatting with her than talking to me. Mas mahaba pa sila magchat kesa sa paguusap namin, 24/7 naman kami magkasama.

Mainit ngayon yung divorce. Nasstress ako sa mga nababasa ko, mainly kase, Catholic ako, at kailangan ko ng divorce.
Lumaki ako sa Catholic schools. alam ko naman yung mga aral, doctrina, at may takot at paniniwala ako sa Diyos.
Nag-asawa ako, more a little less than 20 years ago. Puno ng pangarap at excitement, tapos, yung asawa ko, babaero at sinungaling pala. paulit-ulit na lang. hanggang sa hindi ko na kinaya yung kahihiyan, sakit... nagka depression na ako... kaya sabi ko sa sarili ko, ayoko na, tapos umalis na ako sa poder nya.
nagtry ako ng annulment pero dahil ang sabi sa akin ng abogado, kailangan eh mental incapacity lang, at kailangan kong patunayan sa korte na bago pa kame ikasal ay wala na syang capacity na magtaguyod ng pamilya, hindi ko naituloy yung kaso. mainly dahil wala akong makuhang willing tumistigo. dead end.
ayaw ng abogado ko na sampahan ko ng concubenage. dahil sa history daw ng judicial system sa Pilipinas, wala pang nakukulong dahil sa pambababae. kahit pa may anak na sya... mga 3 yata sa ibat ibang babae.... hindi ko na alam. hindi na rin kae ako interesado.
sa ngayon, mga 15 years na kaming hiwalay at wala akong alam at paki sa buhay nya pero gamit ko pa din ang surname nya.
kailangan ko ng divorce, pero tuwing nakikita ko yung mga religious posts against divorce, nalulungkot ako. pero bukod dun, sa totoo lang, iniisip ko, hindi ba ako mahal ni Lord dahil against sa faith ko ang hinihiling ko? nachachallenge na ngayon pati ang Faith ko... nagdadoubt na ako sa pagmamahal ng Diyos sa akin.
sa sarili ko, wala naman akong ginawang mali. pinilit kong ayusin. hindi ako ang nagloko. hindi ako ang nagsinungaling. hindi ako ang gumawa ng dahilan para masira ang kasal ko... pero dahil sa religion, pakiramdam ko, ang tingin sa akin ng simbahan ay madumi, dahil sa gusto ko ng divorce.
kapag nagbabasa ako ng articles na nagdedebate yung mga tao, na binibigyan ng bible verse yung mga pro divorce, di ko alam ang iisipin ko. kase masakit. ang alam ko, ang paniniwala ko, di naman brutal si Lord, diba? mahal naman nya tayong lahat? pero bakit sila, yung mga yan na nagpopost na anti divorce sila based sa religion, bakit di nila nakikita na grabe silang mangjudge?

Long post ahead
Shoutout sa mga may galit sa relatives. Alam kong patience is a virtue, pero I can't anymore. I'm SO ANGRY to the point na gusto ko manakit, but I won't.
It all started kasi yung kapatid ko and yung pinsan ko (both M17, same age) gragraduate na ng high school. Close kaming magpipinsan (except sa anak ni tito na babae) to the point na parang magkakapatid na kaming lahat, lumaki kaming magkakasama since mga parents namin former OFWs so grandparents nagpalaki talaga samin.
Yung mga parents namin, apat silang magkakapatid (dalawang nasa States). Ngayon, yung dalawang nasa States nagpadala ng pera para bumili ng gamit at pang celebrate nung dalawa.
Kay mama nila pinadala yung pera kasi yung tito ko (father ng pinsan ko, kapatid ni mama) for some reason, walang pakeelam sa mga lalake niyang anak. All he cares about is his daughter (F12) and yung mga anak ng asawa niya (yes, anak ng wife niya sa unang asawa), dun napupunta yung pera nila. Kaya wala nang tiwala mga tita ko pati si mama na magbigay ng pera sakanya derecho.
Ngayon umaga palang nagusap na silang magkakapatid (mama ko, tito and titas). Buo na usapan, pupunta dito yung pinsan ko para lumakad sila ng kapatid ko bumili ng gamit tas syempre kain sila sa labas. At first, umoo na yung tito ko, edi tuwang tuwa yung mga gagraduate.
Nung magreready na sana sila, bigla namang nagbago nanaman isip ng tito ko. Telling lies na "hindi daw pwede si ** kasi nasa school.." ganto ganyan. We know it's a lie kasi may gc kaming magpipinsan and naguusap currently.
Nung pinush ni mama yung dahilan (kasi nga alam na namin na nagsisinungaling..) ayon nalaman namin na ang dahilan is yung pinsan naming babae.
Yung anak ni tito na babae (F12), na ANG PANGET TALAGA NG UGALI EVER SINCE. Oo bata siya and me(F23) as panganay na apo I know na dapat mahaba pasensya ko, kasi nga bata.
Pero ever since I met this cousin of mine, all she do is to pull my trigger. Lagi siyang sumasabat sa usapan ng matatanda, pakeelamera at nangunguha ng gamit, inggitera, and isa sa recently ko lang nalaman is nangangalikot siya ng chats or information sa devices namin (sakin, mga kuya niya, and even sa phone ng mama ko).
Nung nag stay siya dito sa condo ko, pinagbigyan kong gumamit ng pc ko kasi may games and pwede siya mag netflix or disney or whatever she wanted to do. Pero nahuli ko, nag bubukas ng facebook/discord/and heck pati Viber ko?! Pinagsabihan ko na siya non, and of course- I banned her from entering my room EVER again. Pero hinde, inulit nanaman niya and the second time around sa phone na ng mama ko- reading convos of her and my step dad like- ANO BA TONG BATANG TO?!
Inggitera, pag nakakakita siya ng feminine products such as skincare products, or make-up, lagi siyang mag cocomment ng "sana all" followed by asking if pwedeng "sakanya nalang".
Syempre, I said NO. Bakit? anong gagawin niya sa mga yon? ang bata bata pa niya, hindi pa siya pwedeng maglalalagay ng kung ano ano sa mukha niya. and what did she say? ang SAMA DAW NG UGALI KO KASI MADAMOT AKO. The audacity of this kid-
lastly (eto yung pinaka ayaw ko, at mostly nag cause ng away recently), gusto niya palaging tungkol sakanya. Pag aalis kaming magpipinsan (kaming magkaka age. Hence mga kuya niya, and iba pang pinsan) gusto niya kasama siya, or if bibili kami ng gamit dapat pati siya meron. If not? mag tatantrums. Magdadabog, iiyak, magsusumbong sa tatay niya.
And of course, yun yung dahilan kung bat di nanaman pinayagan yung pinsan ko. Kasi hindi siya kasama. Nag tantrums siya na "bakit di siya ang isasama? bakit kapatid pa niya? kung di daw siya sasama wag daw papayagan kapatid niya, HINDI DAW PWEDE" I was SO PISSED OFF, kaya minessage ko siya sa messenger niya:
Telling her na I won't tolerate her attitude anymore, na HINDING HINDI NA SIYA BABALIK SA CONDO KO(yes, she loves visiting here kasi we have a pool and lagi siyang nakakatikim ng Grab/or lagi siyang kasama if we go shopping and such).
Not just that, hinding hindi ko na siya isasama sa mga gala. Telling her how me, and my other cousins (from States) are very angry and disappointed at her because of her ugly and disgusting attitude.
Kawawa palagi mga pinsan ko sakanilang mag ama. Sa kanilang tatlong magkakapatid (F12, M17, M20) siya ang hindi disiplinado. May time pa na nabubugbog ng tito ko yung dalawa kong pinsan DAHIL SA KAGAGAWAN NIYA, or if ever na nasasama yung dalawa sa gala namin tas siya hinde (OO BINUBUGBOG SILA DAHIL SA TANTRUMS NUNG BATANG YON).
Never pa nakaranas ng palo or anything yung pinsan kong yon, hindi siya nakatikim ng disiplina. Saming magpipinsan, SIYA LANG ANG MAY UGALING GANON! Di na nga nag aaral ng maayos, laging napapatawag magulang sa school (kasi apparently, lagi siyang nananabunot, nananakit ng classmate), and for some reason- IS REALLY INTO ASKING ABOUT STUFF SHE WASN'T SUPPOSED TO KNOW (kissing, relationships, boyfriends, etc..)
Going back to the main story, after I messaged her- tumawag tito ko. SO ANGRY and pinagmumura kaming lahat (naka call silang apat na magkakapatid). P I daw ako, mama ko, kapatid ko, kaming lahat. Bakit? minura ko daw pinsan ko.
I didn't. Buti nalang, as I sent my message- I was also on call with 2 of my other cousins. In fact, some of the message I sent are from them. Pero walang mura sa messages. I sent screenshots to all of them, proving na hindi ko minura ang pinakamamahal niyang anak na babae.
Nakakatawa lang, kasi my tito is such a liar. Still pushing the fact na minura ko yung bata and saying na wag na wag daw ako magpapakita don kung hindi ingungudngod niya daw pagmumukha ko.
Lol, as if he can do that. And if he did, I can report him. Not only if he do something to me, pero I can also report the abuse he's doing to his sons.
Isa pa, wala siyang karapatang pagbawalan ako don kasi HINDI NIYA BAHAY YON. Bahay yon ng grandparents namin, may documents proving that (na kay mama na ngayon). So kung ayaw niya mapalayas don, wala siyang karapatang ingudngod ako LOL. I can go there WHENEVER I WANT.
Syempre galit na galit kaming lahat. Mama ko, mga tita ko, at dahil don-- wala na silang (tito ko at pinakamamahal niyang anak) matatangap na sustento o kahit ano galing sa mama ko o sa mga tita ko (he's jobless, and yung mahal niyang asawa di gaano nagpapadala kasi napupunta sa mga anak niya sa unang asawa).
The audacity for him to get mad. Nilayasan na sila nung isa kong pinsan dati (M20). Bumalik lang dahil sa kapatid niyang isa (M17). Pero he told us na once na nasa edad na kapatid niya, lalayasan na nila sila don.
Couldn't wait for it to happen. As for us? wala na. Di ko na sila kinikilalang tito o pinsan (except sa dalawang lalake kong pinsan). Napatawad ko nga sila dati nung nagpakalat sila ng fake news na buntis daw ako. HAH di naman nila napatunayan. Then magsosorry sila ngayon? DI NA.
Ang lakas pa ng loob niyang sabihin na wala daw akong karapatan na murahin anak niya kasi wala naman daw ako naibigay sakanila- LOL MATAPOS KONG BILHAN NG SANDAMAKMAK NA GAMIT YUNG PINAKAMAMAHAL NIYANG ANAK AT TULUNGAN SILA SA FINANCES NILA, WALA?! Hindi ko sinusumbat pero ang kapal lang na ganon niya kami tratuhin.
Now, he and his precious daughter won't get anything from us anymore. Good riddance.
Edit: Salamat sa pagbasa ng hinanakit ko. Sa mga nagtatanong kung bat di namin kupkupin, tinry ko nang ibring up sa family ko yan (mama, step-dad, mga titas) pero tutol sila kasi di nga naman namin responsibilidad sila. Kung irereport naman namin si tito, ayaw din ng mga tita ko kasi kapatid padin nila, at hindi padin samin mapupunta mga pinsan ko; dun sa mother side sila mapupunta (ayaw din nila don kasi garapal din ugali ng mga yon. Kami lang talaga ang tumutulong sakanilang magkapatid)

Hi everyone. I'm 24F. Currently living out of pulau Jawa. Anak pertama, dan punya adik 14M.
Backstory: Right after high school, i took a gap year mainly because my family's finance was not good at all. Mom had numerous debt after my step dad passing in 2015. So i worked ever since i was 18, dari serabutan sampe akhirnya gue bisa dpt corporate job thn 2019. Kuliah sambil kerja (awal masih dibantu nyokap untuk bayar UKT, tapi semester 3 sampai gue lulus it was all me). Dan dari kerjaan serabutan gue pertama, sampai sekarang, I have always tried to give something to my mom. Dari nominal kecil sampe lumayan gede gue selalu share as my thank you.
Singkat cerita, setelah sekian lama enduring all the passive agressive from my family (mom and brother), gue dpt offer di luar pulau untuk kerja dan gue ambil tanpa mikir panjang karena gue udah segatahan itu dirumah. Giving money is one thing, being eldest daughter is another thing. Nyokap gue dititik kalo ngobrol sama gue gajauh-jauh dari duit. I could talk about the anything with her it will end up to her lacking of money. Even gue udh jauh dari rumah, isi chat kita garing, gada tuh nanya kabar gue gmn/kerjaan gue dan ujung2nya bakal ngomongin duit. And because I know her, that's her way of asking money. She never explicitly 'asking' for money from me, rather she will be passive agressive, atau kode2 gitu loh. Gue pernah blg sm dia, kalo memang butuh, ngomong, gausah gaenakan, dan sebisa mungkin jika gue mampu gue akan bantu.
Tapi tetep aja, masih dengan kode2 itu, ditambah omongan dia yang selalu terngiang "Mama gabutuh uang dari kamu, ka. Mama cuma butuh kamu berbakti aja sama mama, cukup kok. Mama masih bisa sendiri kalo uang." Tapi gue gapernah dengerin dan gue ngerasa selama gue masih tinggal dirumah dia, gue harus bantu. Sampai akhirnya gue memutuskan untuk move out. I thought, this way it would be easier to say no, incase i do not want to give her any money (sorry gada uang/uang lg mepet abis). Ternyata engga cuy lol
Saat gue pindah, gaji gue memang naik, tapi gue jg merasa gue harus bayar rent + cost of living dll yang dimana walau bukan pulau jawa, gue juga harus nabung untuk masa depan gue. Gue tetep ngasih setiap bulannya, tapi nominal gue turunin sedikti demi sedikit. Tapi ternyata diluar allowance bulanan yang gue kasih ke dia, gue juga tetep ngasih ke adek gue. Lama-lama banyak yang dia minta, entah dari isi topup e-wallet. Belum lg adek gue minta.Januari kemarin, adek gue dengan bodohnya nabrak orang. Iya umur 14 tahun dikasih motor dan diberi izin, nabrak anak kecil. Untung korbannya cm luka ga sampe meninggal. Nyokap gue nelfon gue, laporan. Salahnya gue disini trauma takut dimintain uang, gue ada omongan bahwa maaf, gue gabisa bantu karena pengeluaran lg memang banyak dan gue baru aja kasih duit bulanan dia juga. Gue saat itu worry tp juga bener2 gabisa bantu + gue ngerasa ini jg kelalaian dia sbg ortu ngasih izin adek bawa motor. Dia sakit hati merasa dia cm pgn lapor tp gue malah bales gitu. Had a whole fight, sampai dimana dia ada omongan yang super nyakitin, kemungkinan gue tidak akan bisa memaafkan dia sampai gue mati nanti.
> She said and I quote "Kamu tidak malu sudah mengambil jatah kasih sayang papa adek kamu? Dia anak yatim kasian gada yang sayang. Kamu dulu saat kecil dapat kasih sayang dari papa dia harusnya kamu malu. Kamu baru bisa ngasih yang tidak seberapa itu jangan harap bisa membayar pengorbanan yang sudah diberikan oleh ibu kamu ini."
(Context: never met my bio father, grew up with my step dad, im grateful he was a decent kind man. Step dad died when I was 15 and my brother was 5. Knp gue harus kesannya ambil jatah? Dan gue tau, gue blm bisa kasih a whole house, tp pengorbanan dan pemberian gue 0 aja gitu dimata dia selama ini? Whew.)
Bulan ini, gue ga ngasih bulanan ke nyokap, karena sejujurnya gue sempet travel tanpa bilang ke mereka. Karena gamau dianggap gue ada uang banyak dan mereka minta lebih. Karena dimata mereka kalo gue bisa jalan2, ada uang lebih untuk mereka dong. Gue gamau ngasih kalo ga ikhlas. Tapi gue dikejar-kejar seakan gue ada hutang sm mereka. Sampe dikirim video tentang anak durhaka halus karena mereka anggep gue ada uang tapi gamau ngasih. Padahal uang gue beneran abis dan gue udh blg ke mereka tanpa konteks gue abis jalan2. But they still kode2 pasif agresif.
I've had enough, gue tau mungkin yang gue tulis disini ga cover beberapa tahun gue menjadi sandwich generation di keluarga gue. All the mental I've had to go through. And I know I sound so selfish to have a desire to cut them off completely over this matter. But truth is, ini resentment built up dari dulu yang memang baru meledak sekarang. P.S Nyokap gue gamau remarry lg krn dia males, gue udh kasih restu kalau memang dia mau nikah biar ada yang provide untuk dia selain gue. Karena gue juga cm anak, bukan the man of the family.

1. Apakah wise kalau memang gue truly go NC?
2. Karena posisi gue ga dirumah, gue cm ada foto KK dan copy KK. Is this possible untuk pecah KK
3. Are there other necessary steps if I'm going to NC with them?

All the help and comment will be appreciated. Thank you.

Ito ay question na may halong noisy thoughts, rants, at need ko rin ng advice. Basta very messy ang mind ko ngayon, pasensya na.
Nagm-make sense ba kung sasabihin nating iisa lang ang Dios ng lahat ng relihiyon sa mundo kung iba-iba naman pala tayo ng pagkakakilala sa Kaniya, iba-iba ang mga paniniwala natin sa pagsamba, at iba-iba ang inuugali?
Example ko na rito iyong mga Christian at Muslim. I want to hear other ditapaks' thoughts. Pakitama po ako kung tingin niyo ay mali itong sasabihin ko. 🙏 Gusto ko lang po maglabas ng opinyon kahit na hindi hinihingi. 😅
Mayroon tayong Supreme Almighty. One Powerful God. Creator of All. All we wanted is to worship Him. Iyong iba sinasabi na may Begotten Son Siya habang iyong iba naman sinasabi na wala, at na nag-iisa lang Siya.
Mayroon lang kasi akong nabasang comment dito at parang sinasabi niya na...sa iisang Diyos lang naman nakaturo lahat ng pagsambang ginagawa natin sa Maylikha. Hindi ito iyong exact na sinasabi, pero ganito ang message.
Para sa'kin kasi, parang hindi iyon tama. It's not sitting well with me. Parang it's so off. I even think it's a disrespect for the religions to say that they're all just the same. Marami rin kasi akong naririnig na ganoon ang paniwala, tapos napapaisip lang ako. Kung halimbawa iyong Diyos ko iyong sinasabi sa Bible...tapos iyong Diyos mo ay iyong nasa Quran, edi hindi ba ang lalabas magkaiba tayo ng Diyos?
Dahil ang Bible at Quran, magkaiba ng sinasabi. Hindi po ba dapat common sense na lang? Kasi kung parehas lang naman pala tayo ng sinasambang Diyos, bakit hindi na lang magsama-sama iyong mga Christian at Muslim? Exactly. Kasi magkakaiba. Kung kini-claim man ng mga Muslim na ang Diyos nila ay iyong Diyos ni Abraham, paano siya exactly naiiba sa mga bulaang propeta na nakikita natin sa panahon ngayon? Kung ang Diyos ni Abraham ang Diyos ng mga Muslim, bakit hindi sila kadiwa at kapareho ng sinasabi ni Moses, eh ang Diyos ni Moses ay Diyos din ni Abraham, 'di ba?
I think the simplest answer here is because God's promise was directed to Isaac from Sarah, which was a miracle child from God. Not Ishmael who was the eldest son of Abraham from Hagar. May mga magagandang pangako para kay Ishmael ang Diyos, pero mababasa naman natin na hindi siya ang sinasabi ng Diyos na magiging tagapagmana ni Abraham.
Marami ang nagsasabi, sila ang totoo, sila lang daw iyong may tamang interpretation sa Bible at maging sa history mismo, pero basang-basa naman ang pagiging bulaan kung susuriing mabuti.
Sa maliit na personalidad nga ni Bro. Eli, marami na siyang naloko, do we really expect na walang katulad niya, na mas malaking personalidad, may mas malaking kapangyarihan at impluwensya, noon-noon pa? Kasi ngayon nararamdaman ko, base sa mga lumalabas na katiwalian at isyu sa MCGI, parang delusyonal na lang pala ang dating ni Bro Eli.
Naalala ko noon may "hiwaga" pa siyang sinabi sa TG na kambal sina Cain at Abel, pero magkaiba sila ng ama. Anak daw ni Satanas si Cain kay Eba. (Parang binhi raw yata, ganoon?) Na hindi talaga siya anak ni Adan kaya siya naiiba kina Abel at Seth. Ang sabi, hiwaga raw iyon na lihim sa mga tagalabas, at regalo lang na knowledge na ipagkakaloob sa bayan ng Diyos—which is MCGI daw. Kaya kung babasahin daw sa Biblia, nakakubli daw sa likod ng mga talata iyong hiwaga. Kaya hindi mababasa sa letra na kambal iyong magkapatid. Ewan ko kung totoo 'to pero pakiramdam ko mali kasi kung babasahing maigi sa Biblia, hindi sila sabay pinanganak. Nauna talaga si Cain, bago si Abel.
We cannot just twist the words of God para lang magkaroon ng bagong interpretation o hiwaga kuno, 'di ba? Kasi kung para lang iyan sa MCGI na mga anak ng Diyos ibibigay, bakit may nakita akong random foreign content creator sa YT na nagsasabi rin ng theories na iyan? Pwede niyong i-search! Ang siste tuloy, hindi lang pala si Bro Eli nagsasabi na anak ni Satanas si Cain. So, paano na iyong sinasabing hiwaga na maiintindihan lang ng buong kapatiran...kung may kung ano-anong theory din na lumalabas sa mga tagalabas ng MCGI na katulad nito?
Anong thoughts niyo rito?
Pero hindi naman iyan ang main topic dahil ang point ko lang, although may makukuha ka naman talagang kabutihan sa mga aral ni Bro Eli, pero iyong mga doktrinang tinatag niya, at mga pinangangaral marami nang butas. 🤧 Hindi lang kasi pansin sa una dahil para siyang nagwawalang lobo na nagdamit tupa lang at ginamit ang salita ng Diyos sa sariling interest para makamanipula ng mga tao. Masakit sa dibdib, pero iyon talaga ang nagiging dating. Nakakatakot kasi bakit nagsasalita naman siya para ipalaganap ang salita ng Diyos, at mabuti iyon, pero ganito kagulo at ka-inconsistent ang mga doktrina at aral niya? Minsan iniisip ko na lang, ano kayang tumatakbo sa isip niya? Naligaw lang ba siya sa sobrang daming kaibahan ng faith sa mundo? O nabaliw na ba siya kababasa niya ng Biblia kaya iyong mga madali lang sana maintindihan, naging komplikado sa kagustuhan niyang maging kakaiba sa dami ng mga mangangaral sa panahon ngayon? Pero ayoko nang mag-isip ng masama pa, parang pati ako eh masisiraan ng bait kakaisip sa anong nangyari. Diyos na bahalang humatol sa kaniya at sa iba pa. 😭🙏
Siya lang daw ang Sugo, eh. Sa kaniyang interpretation lang ang tama. Halos wala na siyang pinagkaiba kay Manalo na sinabing anghel daw at huling sugo sa panahon na ito, pero namatay naman.😭😭😭 Tapos si Bro. Eli ire-reveal daw niya iyong 67th book ng Biblia sa pagkakatanda ko? Tama ba? Basta ang alam ko may sobrang importante raw siyang sasabihin, ganoon. Revelation yata niya. Pero namatay din bago pa niya masabi (kung ano man iyon). 🥲 Ano kaya iyon, 'di ba? Hindi naman din daw alam ni KDR. Ang lusot niya rito, "ibig sabihin ayaw ipaalam ng Diyos yung 67th book". 😭😭😭
Sa mga ditapak na nakarinig ng sinabi niyang iyon, tama ba o mali ang memory ko? Baka lang may mga context akong hindi naintindihan sa sinabi ni Bro. Eli? Kasi iyon talaga natatandaan ko, kahit lutang lang akong nakikinig noon. Parang halos kasing tunog lang ito noong sinabi niya noong mga nakaraan pang paksa na "hindi raw ba natin hahayaan ang mangangaral na mangaral sa sarili niyang paraan?" Non verbatim. Para sagutin iyong tanong ng iba kung bakit hindi siya katulad ni Bro. Eli mangaral. Ako lang ba nakarinig nito? Natatakot ako, baka mamaya nagdedelusyon o nagiilusyon na lang din ako para paniwalaan sarili kong nasa. 😭
Ang punto ko lang dito, ang daming sinungaling, delusyunal, at masamang diwa sa mundong ito. At ang pinakamasakit na paraan ng pandaraya ni Satanas ay ginagamit niya ang salita ng Diyos para makapanloko at makapandaya ng mga tao. Parang ang dating, bibigyan ka ng Diablo ng so-called faith pero pagdating ni Kristo, magugulat ka, hindi ka pala kilala...
"I never knew you; depart from me' you workers of lawlessness." Matthew 7:23. Naluluha ako kapag naaalala ko ito. Ito pinaka kinatatakutan kong marinig kay Kristo kapag humarap ako sa kaniya pagdating ng araw.
Kaya sa mga kapatid na nakaalis na sa samahang tila kulto na ito, sana mas magtumibay kayo sa Diyos, huwag nang magpadaya at mag-ingat sa pagbabasa ng Biblia, because these are the times when we should seek Him the most. 🤍🙏

Sana 'di to makalabas sa reddit hahaha.
For context, may tita kasi ako na pinatuloy namin dito sa bahay (malaking compound to so dun sila sa isang bahay) and pinapatutor-an sakin yung anak nyang grade 9. It's been on for a year and sa loob ng isang taon na yun super unbearable yung tita ko. For example, kahit late (7-9pm) pinapatutor nya sakin anak nya knowing may school din ako kinabukasan. Hindi naman ako makadecline kasi pinipilit and ginuguilt trip nya ko, so para tigilan nya ko sa nonsense nya um-oo nalang ako and 1 hour nalang imbis na sa usual na 2 hours. Sobrang dami pa nyan and di ko na iisa isahin pero ang main point dito, mahilig sya mang guilt trip at manipulate para makuha gusto nya.
Yung problem ngayon is may paper na ipapasa yung anak nya and sinend sakin nung tita ko around 11pm sabi nya sakin, na icheck ko daw at i rephrase yung mga words para maayos daw. Sabi ko naman is hindi naman pede baguhin or paltan ko yung mga words para umayos grammar kasi parang cheating yon. Minanipulate na naman ako sabi nya sakin is (hindi to exact words ha) "sobrang pagod ko at may work pa ko mamaya (call center agent sya) at binabayaran naman kita nang maayos more than pa nga para sa studyanteng kagaya mo dapat half lang binabayad sayo" (1500 lang binabayad nya sakin, para sa 5-7 subjects) ganyan yung sinasabi nya sakin so inayos ko nalang ulit para matuwa sya. Ngayon nag email naman daw itong school sa kanya na may AI daw na nadetect sa paper nung anak nya at nawala daw sa honor anak nya. Syempre galit na galit sya sakin kasi ako ang nag ayos non. Sinagot ko sya nang malumanay na sabi ko is "ang ginawa ko lang naman po ay i-edit yon at ayusin ang formatting." Ni hindi ko na nga naquillbot yon pambihira.
Fast forward, nakatambay ako dito sa malapit sa bahay nila so natural makikita nya ko sabi ba naman nya sa pinsan ko kumukulo daw dugo nya pag nakikita nya ko. Tas pag nadadaanan ko sya magpaparinig sya sakin na "Putangina nawala sa honor si (pangalan ng anak nya)."
Bakit parang pinapamuka ng magulang ko na kasalanan ko kasi gusto ko na sya sagutin at kausapin. Kesho di daw maganda sagutin mga matatanda. Bawal daw ako nag talk back at manahimik nalang ako kasi respetuhin ko daw matatanda. Hahahaha pagod na ko maging "marespeto" ako na naaabuso dito. What do I do hahaha

Mag kaaway yung mama ko and ate ko since 2020 pa, it all started nung nakipag hiwalay yung ate ko sa ex nya nung nalaman nya na may pamilya na pala yung guy.
Both my Ate and the guy were OFW, umuwi na si ate sa pinas tapos si guy IDK. Noong sila pa, at nasa abroad pa si ate, nag papadala sila ng pera kay mama para pambili ng mga lupa sa province kasi don nila gustong tumira.
Nung umuwi din si ate dito sa pinas, nag start din sya agad mag pagawa ng bahay sa isa sa mga lupa na nabili nila.
Binenta nya yung sarili nyang bahay sa old place nya para pang pagawa ng bahay sa lote nila. But, few months after nalaman ni ate na may pamilya pala yung lalaki. meron din syang maliliit na anak kaya nakipag hiwalay agad si Ate ko. But, the guy talked to my mom and nag paawa awa keme. He said na may ibang lalaki ang ate ko kaya nakikipag hiwalay at pinaniwalaan sya ni mama. Since then, lagi na nag popost si Mama ng kung ano ano about ate. Tinulungan nya din si guy na maitransfer sa anak ni guy na nasa Pinas yung titulo ng lupa since initialy nga naka pangalan yun kay mama ko (bilang sya yung bumili in behalf nila ate).
Nung kinonfront ko si Mama dati about dito, ang main reason nya “Ayaw ko sa mga manloloko.” which I cannot accept since, cheater nga si guy. kaso kapag sinasabi ko yan kay mama, nagagalit sya. na brainwash na daw ako ng ate kong demonyo. Madami ding instances na sinusugod ni Mama si ate sa bahay nya para palayasin kasi hindi daw sa kanya yun. minsan kapag walang tao kila ate, uuwi syang gulo gulo mga gamit nila kasi tinapon na ni mama sa labas. May times din na sinamahan ni Mama sa lote ni ate yung asawa ni guy.
Nag sampa na ng kaso dati si ate pero inatras nya din kasi ayaw nyang mas lalong magalit sa kanya si Mama kasi for her, kay guy naman sya may issue at hindi sa mama namin. That on off gulo runs for years. Tapos bandang Nov last year, nag stop na. Mag kakasama pa nga kami na mag pasko nung 2023 although di talaga pinapansin ni Mama si ate.
Then, recently may natangap nanaman na subpoena si ate dahil may nag keclaim nga daw ng lote nya. We learned that it was guy’s son tapos sinamahan ni mama sa abogado yung lalaki para mag file. Nag I start nadin ulit si Mama na mag post sa Facebook about sa nanghihingi sya ng payo sa mga magulang tungkol sa kung anong gagawin dahil may makasalanang anak keme.
Nakaka rindi na, hindi lang kasi name ni Mama yung nadadawit tuwing mag popost sya since apelyedo din naman namin yung apelyedo nya. Also, sa lahat ng post nya, everyone thought na lahat kaming anak nya masama. Ilang beses na kami ni kuya nag sabi sa kanya dati na wag na mag post ng mga ganyan, pero nag popost padin sya. Ano pa bang pwede naming sabihin sa kanya para tigilkan nya si ate at tumigil syang mag post nang hindi sya nababastos?

TLDR; 17M looking for ways to earn money without getting a part time job so I can buy a camera (looking for ways other than selling recyclable stuffs at recycling center)
Hello, as the title suggest, I (17M) is kinda looking for ways to earn money that doesn't require me to work as a dishwasher or something similar. I've been thinking of selling recyclable items to a recycle center (been collecting mineral bottles to sell them) and I wonder is there any other way to earn money?
I do have siblings, but they're busy with their own family (ada anak suda haha) so I don't want to ask them money anymore, As for my parents, they both provide me duit saku for school daily but when I have some leftovers money I only ask them half of the usual amount they would give me
The main reason why I'm trying to get money is so I could buy a camera and it's been my hobby since I was form 3. Taking pictures using my phone is just not that good anymore since my built-in camera is getting laggy especially when I'm trying to record a video

I think I’m losing attraction for my husband. We’ve been married for 2 years at feeling ko nababawasan na yung attraction ko sa kanya and natatakot ako na magtuloy tuloy.
Here are my reasons: 1. I’m concerned about his heath. He’s overweight and we are trying to conceive that is why this one is a big deal for me. Ilang beses nadin kaming nagusap how he can improve pero parang wala syang enough effort to be fit and we all know na dapat sa kanya manggaling yung determination to do something about it or else hindi ko sya mattulungan. Yes, inopen ko na sa kanya many times and he keeps promising na he’ll do something abt it. He tries pero minimal effort. I’m also helping him by inviting him mag jog/ exercise pero talagang ako ang nag iinitiate. I’m also sending him vids to inspire him and bumibili ako ng healthy food for us. So frustrating kasi alam kong kaya nya kasi nagawa naman nya maging fit before. So anong problema? Yes, we are on the same page of wanting to have a baby. Both praying for it 🙏🏻

1. He does not seem to care much about his hygiene anymore. Nung magjowa palang kami hindi naman ganto or dahil hindi lang kami magkasama sa isang bahay kaya hindi ko napapansin or pwede din na sobrang comfortable na nya sa akin. Parang he doesn’t care about how he looks for me and I think that is still important even when ur already married??? Parang it’s turning me off. Na-open ko nadin sya pero parang same effort lang.
   
2. Dati okay lang sa akin na magkaiba kami ng trip. Mas magala ako sa kanya and he’s a home buddy. Hindi nya ako nrrestrict to go out with friends or have a date with myself pero minsan nallungkot ako kasi dapat sya yung kasama ko mag enjoy. Pag sa dates, “ikaw bahala” “kahit anong gusto mo” ang input nya. Minsan nakakasawa na ako nalang palagi ang nagddecide.
   
3. (This one is really not a main issue pero a contributing factor). I’m more financially stable than him. Kaya din siguro wala syang gana pag ang topic namin is travel or places we wanna go. Mejo nanibago lang din ako dahil nung single ako, I traveled a lot and talagang naeenjoy ko having new experiences. I want to experience this with him especially now na wala pa kaming anak pero ramdam ko yung restriction nya and nakakawala din ng gana.
   

He has so manyyyy good qualities din. He’s so hands on sa household chores, he manages my mood swings so well, he’s emotionally available, he’s persistent in making me happy, would never cheat, treats me like a queen etc. Basically he’s a good guy and I don’t like the possibility of falling out of love because of the ugly things. I know na I should’ve realized this before marriage but here we are. Siguro the good things overshaddowed the ugly parts and I thought I’d be willing to compromise and accept. But ngayon narrealize ko na these things are important.
So I’d like your insights please. Especially sa married women out there, what should be my approach? Any similar experiences? How did you compromise or accept the ugly parts of ur marriage? I don’t want to sound like a nagger kung paulit ulit kong sinasabi mga concerns ko. We already had mature conversations and fights abt this pero eto padin kami with our unresolved issues.

My younger SIL (lets call her B) just gave birth last year and I helped out a lot sebab dia ni takde suami. When she couldnt calm her newborn baby, i took over and said to her, “i understand how challenging this is, dont worry im here to help you. Dulu i pun ‘koyak’ juga lah masa jaga newborn sbb penat sgt and first time mom kan”. Then B with a straight face replied, “oh i takdelah koyak sebab anak kan. Kenapa i nak koyak dgn anak sendiri”. Well u should’ve said that to your face B bcs i always saw you lose it when your baby is cranky. How dare you guilt tripping me for not coming over to see u n your baby when i actually only went back to my parents house. Mcm aku ni tkde keje lain je nak mengadap kau.
I wont be like this if you were grateful enough for your family for accepting and helping and supporting you through your journey even though what you did was really really bad. You gave birth at a private hosp, your baby gets her monthly checkup at that same private hosp, your mom tanggung both of you 100% from your car loan to your baby’s diapers and milk. Your brother (my husband) took one for all by saying to our relatives that the baby is our adopted child even though its ridiculous bcs the baby looks exactly like you.
But you are still like your old self. Arrogant, entitled, spoiled and tak reti jaga mulut. You scolded me for breastfeeding your baby even though ive asked permission and its for the baby’s own good. You shamelessly go out and about bringing your baby everywhere. I said this bcs it invites question from people around us and my husband has to lie. Sometimes, when my husband’s friends came over and B happens to be there with her baby, she would suddenly come near to my husband while holding her baby over to my husb and said, “hi daddy”. Of course member husb aku pelik and tanya eh ni anak siapa? You even had the audacity to marah everyone including me sebab lambat uruskan your placenta. My BIL snapped and scolded you and then you went ahead and cried to your mom. So what did your mom do? Of course she called all of your siblings and gave them a scolding for making you cry. Except my husband sbb aku awal2 dah message dkt MIL explaining that we genuinely forgot about the placenta and we kept it safe, and you B dont need to marah2 everyone bcs we also have our plates full. FYI, the siblings tak kesian dkt B’s situation sbb ni bukan first time dia buat benda tu. Cumanya this time terpregnant.
B lives with my MIL. She dont have a job and her income is from my MIL. I dont give a damn about all those special treatment and privilege that she has. But when it comes to my baby, i would give a whole lot of damn ye. My 2yo baby dah tak rapat dgn my MIL ever since B gave birth. Im sad to see they no longer have the bond that they used to have but i decided to distance myself from B for the sake of my mental peace. Distancing from B means distancing from my MIL as well.
But B has crossed the line so so many times that i have to do this. One time, my husb asked B to watch our baby while we both were working. All of us were outside at the time. MIL was holding B’s baby so B was free to watch over my baby. About 10mins or so we suddenly couldnt hear our baby’s voice. Rupanya B tak jaga pun anak aku and she lost my baby. My mind went blank at the time. I just followed where my feet goes and thank god i immediately found my baby. Not a single apology came out of her mouth. Aku jaga anak kau mcm anak sendiri ye tapi kau buat anak aku mcm ni. My baby fell ill later that night sbb i think she was traumatised when she got lost. The next day B accidentally spilled my husb’s drink and she politely said, sorry sebab tertumpahkan air abg. Wah kau hilangkan ank aku tak pandai pulak nk mintak maaf.
There was one time B was so proud of her 5months baby at the time sebab kaki baby dia kuat, boleh tegakkan kaki. She said, “kaki my baby kuat betul lah kuat sgt utk umur dia. Tak macam your baby kan masa 5 bulan your baby lembik2 lagi kan?” Ughh aku lah kan masa tu rasa nak tumbuk je muka kau. Then i said, eh takdelah. Anak i 5 bulan dah pandai lompat2 dah dlm jumper tu”. Then later that evening i posted a story from my archive from when my baby was 5months old and she was jumping cheerfully in the jumperoo. Hahah puas hati aku. Aku tak pernah kisah kau nak bangga2 kan anak kau tapi tak perlu lah nak downkan or comparekan dgn anak org lain. Byk lagi lah kejadian2 compare ni berlaku. Mcm makcik bawang dah perangai kau.
Recently, we stayed at a hotel in a family room. Anak aku tak suka sgt dkt baby si B ni. If the baby cry, my daughter will cry too. If the baby scream, my daughter will scream too. Shes just uncomfortable around the baby. Imagine lah the chaos when both of them are in the same room. Tapi last2 anak aku jugak yg kena marah sbb tantrum padahal ank dia yg punca. My baby, husband and MIL went out first so B and i and her baby checked out later. I jokingly said haa senang sikit nak kemas kalau tak ada dua2 baby serentak. Then B said, “oh my baby takde masalah, senang je nak jaga, tak kuat nangis, baik and dengar kata”. Eh ank kau tu baru 10bulan mana pandai nk tantrum lagi tapi susah jugak nk buat kerja sbb nak kena pegang je. Well, lets see when your daughter turns 2 agak2 anak kau ok ke tak. Later that day when my baby was napping in her stroller, B suddenly said, “anak u tido baru nampak dia baik”, then she laughed. Erghh kau nk mengata anak aku pulak.
She used to bodyshame my baby saying my baby is kurus sangat lah and my MIL pun ckp ank aku kurus lah kesian lah tak makan lah. EXCUSE ME, anak aku ni tinggi mcm bapak dia and kurus mcm mak dia. Her weight is normal, tak pernah turun pun berat dia since lahir. And she didnt seem kurus to me and everyone else pun. Aku dah tak tahan aku post an angry stroy dkt ig abt ppl yg suka mengata badan ank org. Since then dia slow down psal badan ank aku. Last2 MIL bgtahu aku yg berat badan anak B turun 400gram. Thats a lot ye for an infant. Puncanya easy je, B didnt cook real food for her baby. Her main meal is cerelac and biscuits. Sometimes i prepare food for her baby and B mcm tak suka bila MIL puji baby suka makanan aku bagi tu. B rasa mcm tercabar. She was like, “sempat eh u masak. Oh lupa u kan mmg duduk rumah tak kerja”. Like i care? Dah anak kau lapar pstu kau pulak kata busy lah tak sempat lah.
Actually byk je lagi benda menyakitkan hati jadi but cukup lah ni je. My MIL got so upset that my daughter taknak dekat dia lagi dah. Im not responsible for that. Kalau dulu u always come over to my house to see your grandchild why now tak boleh dah? Im not gonna put myself through the emotional torture by being around B a lot. It comes with a price but thats what best for me.

so like umuuso yung trend na to and mas pinipili ng babae ang bear for the reason na violent ang mga lalake in every aspect, tapos andaming lalake naman na butt hurt at lumalaban na ang bear daw eh mas violent sa lalake. lalake ako pero nakaka cringe lang dahil andaming sinasabi ba at nilalaban ng mga lalake sa tiktok at ig tungkol dun tapos may nakita ren ako na picture slide sa tiktok na bakit piliin bear kesa sa babae haha. anyways ambobo ren ng mga lalakeng yun dahil ano ba reason na kailangan nilang protectahan mga babae nila sa ibang tao mainly from other men? bakit sila nag bibigay ng warning about certain men sa circle ng babae dahil na babad vibes sila? dahil pag inisip talaga nila ung tanong eh mas mag make sense kung iisipin nila na kung sila ang pinag pili kung ang jowa okaya anak nila na babae bear or man knowing na di sila ung man na makakasama nila ano pipiliin nyo mga brothers?
tapos sa mga babae ren naman di ko alam sa iba pero ang reason lang naman na pinag sasabihan namin mga jowa namen okaya naiinis dahil binabalewala mga warnings namen eh di lang maganda kutob namen from that certain someone ba kasi di nirerespeto ng certain someone and boundaries kahit na okay lang kami sa ibang lalake na friends nyo.

Made a new account because I don't want my art from my main to get traced here lol
My (27F) fiancé (J, 29M) grew up with a rather narcissistic mother (46F). When she was 17, she found out that she was pregnant and tried to abort him, but was told that na kasalanan yun and was persuaded to keep him.
His dad (46M) got babytrapped, and instead of moving to the US with his parents, he decided to stay for Jay. They then went ahead and got 3 more kids after their marriage, and then the dad left mid-pandemic because he was just done with her. He's still pretty involved, but due to FMIL being a manic bitch that she is, she's not letting the two youngest kids to spend time with him.
Now, why am I the one ranting about this instead of J? Well, there are a few things of note that FMIL did that just deeply triggered me. Namely:

• Back then, J used to give his entire salary including his 13th month pay to her. He only asked for her to save his first salary to a time deposit and a portion of it for his lunch. He didn't leave any for himself as it was his first job and he needed to provide. His lunches would include a can of San Marino and rice at the best days. When J gave his 13th month pay to her after a new job, she was literally jumping in joy. After I conveyed that to J, he told me that he hasn't bought anything for himself except for the PSVita when it first came out. I told him to just give a portion to her and save the rest up for himself. Unfortunately, he still ended up being milked dry because, well, FMIL has a chronic condition of borrowing money and not paying it back. I think this was the time that FMIL viewed me in a rather hostile manner.
• We officially moved in together several years back, and it was a peaceful year with our cats. We ended up saving for a bed of our own. However, things were rather chaotic at their ancestral home. Because it was in the middle of the pandemic, there was a really tense atmosphere. First, J's father left because he couldn't handle FMIL, then the sibling who came after J left to live with their maternal uncle's after a rather intense argument. Then, FMIL herself has to leave because she couldn't pay back any of her debt towards a relative. So that leaves the grandparents and two elementary-grade kids in the house. We ended up moving to their place because grandma insisted to help us save up more money (I don't have a 9-5 due to corpo work-related depression, but I do have some sidelines). We paid for the bills she didn't pay (20k for the electricity bill alone) and did some maintenance work on the house. As soon as that relative passed away, she had started frequenting the ancestral home more until she officially moved in a couple of years ago. Like she literally came back the moment that those debts disappeared.
• Living with her has been such a nightmare. Never have I ever encountered a human that fucks up adobo. As a Filipino, just how the fuck do you fuck up adobo so hard that it didn't have any flavor except for an entire pack of those tingi-tingi ground pepper and an entire pack of liquid seasoning? She had also mentioned that if the toilet gets clogged (they like to pour spoiled food and used oil down the bowl), just pour hot water in it. I literally spent sweat and probably burned a few of my scent receptors unclogging that mess of a toilet bowl only for it to get clogged again. I stopped after it happened for the third time and she blamed me for clogging it when I'm not the one who keeps flushing down food down there.
• Sobrang burara niya. She will leave clothes in the spin-dryer for six hours because "it's dry anyway". Whenever she washes dishes, the floor looks like it got flooded. May kanin pa sa mga utensil whenever she washes cuz she just gives them one pass of the sponge with an abysmal amount of dishwashing liquid before rinsing them off. There was even a time that she dunked the showerhead in the toilet bowl and turned it on at max because it was clogged. She would also make sure to make a big racket just to make people hear that she was doing something, breaking a few things like a door hinge or their fridge. She will purposely mess things up because she wants other people to do it for her. Because grandma was one of the nicest people I've ever met, FMIL took advantage of that and made her do everything in the house.
• Picking up after that chronic condition of "borrowing" money, she had borrowed money from our friends, from the neighbors, from lending companies. I'm just so fucking glad I didn't give her any of my family's contact details otherwise she could've borrowed from my family. She currently owes approximately 6-digits to J, including his "time deposit" which we both doubt ever existed in the first place because she didn't show any paperwork that it was indeed there. Unfortunately as those debts were made verbally we couldn't prove to anyone that she owed him that much.
• She goes into such dramatic hysterics whenever things don't go her way just so she can amass some accomplices and para madaan niya sa awa yung kung anong ginagawa niyang kagaguhan.

That's just a not-so-TL;DR version of the things that triggered me to write this post. But what current events have happened for me to finally rant this here?
Well, it all started when I was leaving two dishes to soak in the sink. She barged into our room, reprimanding me na "kababae mong tao di ka marunong maghugas ng pinggan". Maawa daw ako kay J kasi nagtatrabaho siya kaya ako daw dapat sa gawaing-bahay. Like... woman, I do have a job, just not a regular 9-5. Kesyo di daw ako nakikisama kasi di daw ako naglilinis (woman, again, my responsibilities include making sure that my man is well-fed and well-taken care of, so yung area lang namin including the bathroom and kitchen sometimes yung inaasikaso ko. It does not apply to the rest of the house.).
Our mealtimes have been separate ever since FMIL moved back in here (she also somehow hates my cooking because, admittedly, my cooking is better than hers), so hiwalay din yung hugas ng pinggan namin. I'm like, sure, we'll wash our dishes separately when you don't see it. That night, we washed the dishes properly and spent some time in the living room to cool off (mid-April heat was awful even at night). We left J's phone at the sofa because it was 2am and he needed to work in the morning.
I was then woken up with J turning our floor upside-down because his phone has been missing. I told him that he left it in the living room the night before, but it was no longer there. Only his brother's and FMIL's phone was there. So I tried calling it, texting it, to no avail. FMIL was nowhere to be seen, and we didn't suspect her at first.
J's phone was a Samsung, and as it was registered to his account, we were able to track it at a pawnshop near... a Puregold? But FMIL went to Puregold earlier.
We confronted FMIL, and she was so upset that he could throw such accusations to her. She said she was with her insurance agent (let's call her Mary) earlier, and that we should blame her if anything. It was strange that only J's phone got stolen and not the others, and the other phones looked more expensive if anything.
So we went to the barangay hall just to check CCTV cameras and to file an incident report that J's phone went missing. At about the same time, we were able to contact Mary about the missing phone. Apparently FMIL already called her beforehand, accusing us that we're going to file a blotter against her and et cetera, so Mary had an angry tone at first.
Mary calmed down as soon as we explained the situation to her, and we told her that FMIL told us to blame her for the lost phone. We got into an agreement that we weren't accusing her of anything, and that we just wanted to clear the misunderstanding up by talking.
The following day, it was grandma's death anniversary, so there were a lot of people and a lot of food even up until nighttime. We didn't participate in the event because there were just way too many people. It was then when the people from the barangay hall gave FMIL and J a summons to go to the said hall the next day because of Mary filing a complaint. When FMIL received the summons, she immediately went into hysterics, saying things like "how dare my son send his own mother to jail", with her usual paawa and naghahanap ng kakampi attitude. She then again barged into our floor, demanding that we leave immediately because we're not "respecting" her. We just brushed it off to her own hysterics again, and the following day, J went to the barangay hall.
Mary just wanted to have her name clean because it would affect her job as an insurance agent so much. J was there to be an extra witness, and most of the talks were between Mary and FMIL. When the topic of the phone came up, FMIL kept trying to dodge the subject, and she apparently also looked so embarrassed just by being there. The one sentence that made everyone speechless was "Bakit ayaw mo sisihin yang babae mo?"
Kapitan had to end the meeting there because it got so derailed and FMIL just left immediately. The kicker of this entire situation though? Mary gave J a pat on the shoulder and told him that her son was a lawyer if ever that he needed help.
So anyway she replaced the gate lock and didn't give J and I the spares but instead gave them to the younger kids. I had secretly duplicated the keys so we still had access. We have been on a nearly no-speaking term and we've been looking for a new place to live for the past month or so.
She has gotten a bit pettier, like never letting us use the electric fan in the living room by literally putting it in her bedroom, or turning off the water motor at night because "sayang sa kuryente". Like bitch, you don't pay for the electricity anymore, just the water and even that you can't pay.
So anyway, ang hirap maghanap ng place for rent that's at least cat-friendly.
I know we're not supposed to wish badly upon another person, but goddamn this woman makes it so hard. Sana tumanda ka na mag-isa at di na kinakausap ng mga anak mo. Pwe.
Sorry that this rant has been all over the place, my ADHD is acting up and my bottled-up rage isn't helping it lmao