Stomach pains when i stand diarrhea nausea up

Before getting it removed I would get intermittent pain in my right shoulder which seems to be caused by a problematic gallbladder. Now after getting it removed, I still have the pain. It's worse too, happens more when I stand up and walk around. It's not shoulder pain from gas as the pain is the same as the pain prior to surgery. I won't see my specialist until the morning to query this, but I'm wondering if anyone else experienced this?

Every value that we thought we had, debased and razed to save us 

vibe

The Based Department - Structure and Organization

Reformed from the entirety of the Russian Intelligence community, The Based Department has become a united giant, responsible for all of the intelligence, government cyberwarfare, and partially - state AI research programs within the country. With massive resources, the only thing that held the Based Department was the Ethics committees and idealism of the Department itself, willing to defy the reputation of KGB and FSB. With the Commonwealth fallen, however, and the Ethics Committee itself giving the Department a blank cheque, there are few things that hold it back.
The Department was based around multiple Directorates, responsible each for a sector of the intelligence network. With the passage of time and the rebuilding done after the collapse, many things have changed. As of now, the following is the core structure of the Based Department:

Name	Function
Secretariat of the Based	The chief administration of the Based Department. Responsible for the overall functioning.
First Main Directorate	Responsible for the overall external intelligence work. Includes multiple subdepartments each responsible for one of the hyperstates.
Second Main Directorate	Counter-intelligence. Responsible for keeping the Department out of leaks, and preventing detection of our operations within Karakum and abroad
Third Main Directorate	Military Intelligence. Responsible for maintaining our battlenetwork operations.
Fourth Main Directorate	ELINT, Cyberwarfare, Secure communications, etc. The Largest of the Directorates, with multiple subdirectorates.
Fifth Main Directorate	Currently responsible for guarding the Vaults and bases of the Based Department
Sixth Directorate	Currently responsible for subverting the organized crime in the country to our cause
Seventh Main Directorate	Responsible for Spetsnaz operations
Eighth Main Directorate	Responsible for VDV operations and air transport
Scientific Department	Responsible for the overall R&D of the Department. Prioritizes AI and cybernetic fields, but overall has enough staff to cover all important research fields.
Supply Directorate	Responsible for the overall procurement and supply of the Vaults and the bases
Tenth Department	The paranormal department of the Based. Responsible for unusual cases (like the Atlantic cargo case), also sometimes takes the load of other departments. Some of the newer projects will go there.
Engineering and Technical Service Department	Responsible for technical maintenance and everyday services of all facilities and equipment in active Based Department use. This department is responsible for design and construction of new facilities and routes of communication as well as repair and maintenance of the existing ones.
Medical Department	Responsible for the health and medical care of the staff. Includes all specter of specialists, including cyberhealth specialists and psychologists
Manufacturing Department	Responsible for the overall equipment manufacturing and parts of the maintenance. Currently able to provide artisanial low-level manufacturing, but large projects will require specific tools and facilities.

In addition, the Department includes commeetees (Including Ethics committee and AI relations committee), subdepartments, and other structurers providing it with a significant reach within the intelligence field.

The Based Department - Equipment

Before the collapse, the Department has developed and upgraded a part of the Commonwealth arsenal for their own needs. This includes weapons, accessories, and technology related to clandestine operations.
Considering our work, the Based Department specialized weapons are primarily based on either non-lethal apprehension of targets, or a covert assassination leaving no trace.

• The main weapon suites, are generally equipped with equipment focused on stealth and silent eliminations.

However, some technology was developed in the 60s to better suit our needs.
[M - probably retroactive development. All successors should have the tech too, will work on cleaning what parts are ok and what I'll need to develop myself in the current continuity.

Incapacitating agents

While a lot of our population is synthetic, biological organisms are still widespread, and in order to incapacitate them easier, we have developed new agents.

• We are to work on the development an alternative to Kolokol-1, a fentanyl derived knockout gas. Through the genetic modification of bacteria, supercomputer bioreseach, and other smart buzzwords we will try to develop a less-lethal, more effective alternative, in several forms.
  
• • An invisible agent, designed for use in a similar way to Nord-Ost operation. Pumped in airways, it should be able to slowly knockout those without protection from chemical or biological agents.
• • A thick gas, for use in grenades. Designed for better and faster penetration, potentially able to penetrate some of the filters.
• • A liquid agent capable to be delivered through water supply or injection.

The Based Department has been using agents in various forms, using them to prevent hostage situations or to quietly infiltrate a compound at night. In addition to grenades and gas canisters, The Based Depatrment has developed a "knockout flechette" ammunition, used in our next-generation guns. Contianing a small amount of the Kolokol-X agent, it was designed to penetrate power armor and release the agent inside, incapacitating the person inside directly.

EM stuff

The Commonwealth has been using EMP and EM since long. While Russian technology is quite EMP-resistant due to mass use of photonics and shielding, we do use them widely, including on a personal level.

• A similar to Kolokol-X, a flechette ammunition containing a tiny flux-compression generator EMP, is designed to deliver a strong charge on the impact. Likely penetrating the armor and shorting it from the inside, it should also work against androids, robots and Alfr, breaking the shielding from the inside.
• Widely used on the aircraft and against drones, we have adapted Active Denial System into a portable "laser gun". Firing a tight, metamaterial-focused microwave beam, it works both against human targets (heating up skin and causing signfiicant pain), and against androids/robots (disabling or destroying electronics/photonics) from a 1,5 km away, it works well to push forward during assault while minimizing casualties.

The Suits

While Spetsnaz and VDV are using DAGOTH, the Based Department operatives were designing something of their own - based on the superior Russian fashion industry.
The Suit series of equipment is a broadly applied technology for discreet, personal protection, used by intelligence agents and VIP.

The Suit

The main protection of an intelligence agent. Despite the implication, the Suit is not necessarily a black tuxedo - the technology provides adaptation to all the styles present in the country.

• The first layer is a skin-colored lower layer suit based on the supersilk ballistic fiber. Designed to not stand out, it provides a modest protection of the uncovered parts, and reinforces the rest of the protection
• The clothes themselves are likewise made out of ballistic fiber with additional protection seamlessly integrated into the vital parts. The heavier the clothing, the better the protection. The ranges are nearly anything you can wear.
• Winter clothing (very important in the Far North) has smaller heaters installed, and provides the best protection.
• The headgear also provides protection, and looks good doing so.

The Suit is unlikely to endure agaisnt a modern soldier, but can reasonably stop an armed guard or turn a lethal shot into an injury, providing our agents protection in the dire times.

The Stealth suit

Similar to the Suit, the SS is designed for inflitration and stealth operation:

• The base is similar to the suit - but also much more sleek, and fully covering the face.
• The suit layers are made out of smart fabric and smart sensors, allowing to quickly and precisely change the coloring and texture of the suit, and potentially - even it's form - turning a beachwear into a tuxedo into a dress.
• High-definition realistic holographic projectors are able to enhance the stealth further, either completing the stealth or using it to turn the appearance into something entirely else, especially from the range.
• The soles are made out of vibration-absorbing material to prevent from causing too much noise.
• Overall the SS has less protection, but still good enough to protect against most non-military weapons like older assault rifles.

Based Department - Personnel

The Department is a diverse organization, containing people of various ethnicities (mostly Russian, Polish, Karakum and French, turned into Everlasting androids), and fields of experience. Containing humans, androids, synths and even hypercode, in the halls of the Department facilities you can see nearly any combination of faces, clothes and body parts imaginable. This, also, helps them to blend in the population.

The Agents

Working primarily in the field, the Agents are the investigators, intelligence gatherers, and our reconnaissance. Wearing suits when they can, and what they need when they need, they generally pose as Siberian hunters in remote tundra, general population in the cities, and police investigators when they can, the Agents are responsible for a large part of our intelligence network, currently focused on Karakum. Some might stay in one place, providing general coverage of the region, while others are walking the earth waiting for their next assignment.
Some of the Agents exist as a hypercode - scouting the Internet from

The Negotiators

A small subset of the Department, they are responsible for working with the public and "convincing" them to join our cause. Through charm and less charming means, they are quite capable in the art of making people cooperate. They rarely stay in one place, preferring to maintain the aura of mysteriousness around them. In the Department, they are mostly nice, but also prone to swindling stuff from others in poker,

The Specialists

Those are, ironically, the furthermost people from warfare and operations. Those are procurement specialists - the closest thing we have to the outer world and our supply lifeblood. They have good identities (most of them are their actual identities pre-Collapse), stable remote job and a degree of prescence in the community. In general, their goals are, depending on a person:

• Maintain our sources of income - at this point, that's mostly cryptocurrencies generation, freelance and a small amount of the shell companies - a combination of real and fake, small and medium-sized shell companies. The income is currently more than modest, but provides us with enough cash for our support. They are responsible for giving us assets while staying low.
• Maintain steady supply of necessaries. Mostly, we are reliant on nutrients - while we can recover some and generate others, Department would rather currently continue being supplied through cheaper and more available methods. Likewise, off-the-shelf components provide the Department with more flexibility during maintenance. Through a wide network of distributors, our specialists are supplying us with what we need to survive and operate, leaving no trace.
• Provide us with special procurements - from custom orders to equipment to bribes.

The Spetsnaz

Silent and deadly, they are responsible for most of our combat oprerations. Using Genda/Dagoth chassis and even beyond that, they are the most elite unit of the Commonwealth, and among the best on the planet. With vast experience and training in every field imaginable, when we send these "Genda" Everlasting, we are sending our best.

The Perry

[ДАННЫЕ УДАЛЕНЫ]

The Guard

[ДАННЫЕ ЗАСЕКРЕЧЕНЫ]

The Brain

The custodian of the Mount Yamantau and the Based Department as a whole, the Brain is a combination of multiple supercomputer complexes and a building-sized neural mass. Containing the consiousness of the late King of Russia, the Gigachad, it is now, perhaps, the smartest being in the whole creation. Responsible for a large part of our current protection and cyberwarfare operations, the Yamantau is being used as both the HQ and R&D laboratory, where the Department's finest are researching new and old technology. The AI Singularity is coming, and the Based Department is on it's front and center.
[M] Unless pointed otherwise by Dio, I'll do 3 rolls for tech development and 1 for secrecy of it - it should be available to successors either way. The rest is mostly RP, but will roll if needed.

Whenever I'm sleeping I end up feeling like a knife or something is pushed into my body giving me this excruciating pain. My stomach, legs, chest, back, sides. I have not dealt with this type of dream in a long time.
There was a time in my life when I would have these experiences every night. It got to the point where I would be soo scared to sleep i would stay up; dreading i had to close my eyes. I didn't want to feel the pain again. I'll struggle to grunt from the pain, try to move to react to the pain but it feels like my movements get restrained. Just me fight these pain sensation. I don't wish anyone to ever feel pain like this just never ending pain.
When these experiences started happening about 3 years ago. I got a job with a lot of responsibilities and no way I could smoke (green) anymore and I didn't drink; my choice. I watched buildings to secure them. I felt good. I was working out, eating well, I put my heart into everything I do. Then.. it started happening. the first time I didn't think anything of it... but then it happen again. I eventually woke up and I remember just sitting up in silence processing what just happened. Wtf? again? this doesn't feel good at all. it feels so real it hurts. Then it got to the point where as soon as I would go back to sleep the sensations would start again and I would feel like I'm being tortured. Every pain receptor going off. one part of me to the next. Night after night after night. I remember eventually just giving up and letting go and accepting the pain. I woke up. I ended up leaving my job soon after for something less serious and started sparking up again and having a few drinks. Eventually they went away.
I continued life. I worked out, ate well, started a bunch of hobbies & have been enjoying myself. I paint acrylic, do photography, engrave, kayak, fish, cook full course meals, made necklaces bracelets, studied anything and everything that came to mind I'm always fascinating with the world around me. I'm always where I need to be no matter where I end up I help people, connect with them on a deep level.
Few years later ( present times) I forgot about those sensations, those dreams. I've got to a point where I want to get a better job, make more money and impact the world because I got the ability to. I stopped drinking and smoking. Things have been fine. I've been preparing myself to get a better job and live life without smoking and drinking. Took a little to stop drinking but I eventually got to a point where I had no craving for smoke and alcohol. I'm proud of myself!! My life has been one crazy ride which is why I smoked and sipped but I moved on; I've been Looking forward. And grateful for my life experiences. They made me who I am today.
Yesterday was an ordinary day. I'm trying to set myself up, planning where I'm going to work. Looking forward to a new chapter because life's exciting. I went to bed..... the dream and the sensations happened a couple hours after I went to bed. I woke up slightly but fell back to sleep shrugged it off... boom ... torture...I couldn't move I could barely get a grunt out from the pain. I somehow was able to wake myself up. It's 5:30 am. I didn't go back to bed I decided to stay up get myself ready. Take a shower, drove to a dinner and had breakfast even asked to see what position are available and what the rates were just because I liked the place. It was a nice talk. I'm home now...I'm feeling tired now. Im scared to go to sleep I don't want to experience those sensations of being tortured again. I forgot all about them and now it's happening again.....................fuck.
I dont want to drink I don't want to smoke..................fuck..........fuck...........fuck.
Can anyone relate? Am i the only one?
I'm scared to sleep again.

If you want, you can support me on my YouTube channel. @ SciFiTime
The booming thunder of artillery shook the trench walls, as Togor peered through the drifting smoke, searching for targets. Another barrage crashed overhead, raining dirt and shrapnel onto the huddled soldiers.
"Incoming!" Togor yelled, bracing for impact. A shell struck close by, deafening screams mingling with the roar. When the dust settled, two soldiers lay still, their lives crushed in an instant.
Togor gripped his plasma rifle tighter, fury, and fear, fueling his resolve. The humans had been hammering their position all night.
The hardened dirt of the trench wall dug into Togor's back as another barrage of explosions rocked the ground above. He clutched his plasma rifle closer, its familiar surface the only thing steadying his nerves as the humans rained destruction down upon their position once more.
As the bombardment continued, Togor gazed down the line at his fellow soldiers. Their normally pale orange skin had taken on a sickly yellow hue in the dim light of the trench, and dark circles seemed forever etched under every set of eyes. Illness and exhaustion were taking as heavy a toll as the enemy fire ever could.
When the shelling finally ceased, Togor let out a shaky breath and chanced a look over the edge of the trench. The familiar landscape of gnarled tree stumps and craters as far as the eye could see gave no clues to justify the next target. But the humans had proven time and again they didn't need clear lines of sight to hit their marks.
"All clear, men. Stay alert for the counter-battery," Togor called down the line, earning weary nods in return. As platoon leader, he tried to bolster morale with regular communication, but even he found it growing harder each day.
A scraping sound down the trench pulled Togor's attention. He made his way over to find Belex helping another soldier, Nemsor, into a seated position against the wall of the trench. Nemsor's chest heaved with effort just to breathe, his respiratory infection undoubtedly worsening under the stress.
"How is he?" Togor asked gently.
Belex shook his head. "It's the plague, sir. I've given him everything in my medkit but it may not be enough out here."
Togor grimaced. They were all at the mercy of primitive human bioweapons, separated from proper care by kilometers of hostile terrain. "You've done well, Belex. See if you can get him stabilized until evac, then get some rest yourself."
A spluttering cough echoed up the trench then, drawing their attention further down. Two more soldiers were huddled on the trench floor, hacking violently while a third tried in vain to comfort them.
Togor's hearts sank at the sight. "All assigned to this sector have fallen ill," he muttered, more to himself than Belex. An idea formed as he watched the plague spread its insidious grip along his line.
Spinning on his heel, Togor marched back to the command post dug into the forward edge of the trench. A patched-together comm system cluttered one corner, and he squatted down to activate it. "Command, this is Lion lead. Sector Crimson is compromised, over."
Static answered for a long moment before a tinny voice responded. "Copy that Lion lead, what is the status of your position?"
Togor steeled himself before responding. "The human bioweapons have taken hold along my entire line, sir. At least two-thirds of my soldiers are incapacitated due to sickens. We cannot hold this position."
A longer stretch of static followed as high command undoubtedly mulled their dwindling options. Supply lines were overtaxed just keeping them all fed, let alone transporting the sick. But abandon this stretch of trench would leave their flank exposed to human probing attacks.
At last, the voice crackled back. "Understood Lion lead. Fall back one click and establish a new perimeter defense. We'll divert support as able to your sector for defense and medical aid. Command out."
Togor let out a long breath as he ended the transmission. The order had been the only reasonable choice, but that made pulling out of a defended position no easier. He scrambled back up the trench to begin rallying the able and organizing the infirm for evacuation.
Two hours of grueling labor followed as they dismantled what security they had built and prepared to withdraw under the ever-present threat of human detection. Working teams stripped supplies and armaments from the trench while others aided the sick in making the painful trek to the rear.
By the time the retreat began in earnest under cover of darkness, over half of Togor's platoon was unfit to fight. He fell in with the rearguard, anxiously scanning the night for enemy movement as they shuffled the bulky bioscanners used to detect biological and chemical agents thrown off by suffering soldiers. So far, all scopes remained calm.
A rustling off to the left drew Togor's attention as another round of ragged coughing erupted from the treeline. He dashed over with a couple soldiers to find a lone private collapsed in the undergrowth, shivering fiercely even as sweat poured off his brow.
"It's Liser," one of the soldiers stated grimly. Togor knelt to grasp Liser's shoulder, causing the soldier to crack open clouded eyes.
"Sir, can't go on," he croaked through chattering teeth. Togor grimaced, but there would be no saving this one out here.
"Rest easy, private. You've served with honor." Togor produced his sidearm and placed the cool muzzle against Liser's temple, holding the soldier's gaze calmly until the end. A muted cough was the last sound before stillness overtook his form.
Rising stiffly, Togor turned back to the march. They had lost too many already without delaying further. Ahead, the first edges of dawn hinted at the new lines they must struggle to maintain, though against what fresh horrors only the new day would reveal.
The newly established perimeter line snaked along the edge of a dense forest, its gnarled trunks casting deep shadows even under the harsh light of Vega. Togor oversaw the last defenses being dug as daylight faded, already dreading the nightly bombardments to come.
At least here they had cover and concealment lacking on the open frontier. But the forests also hid opportunistic enemies, as Togor well knew. He headed to brief the sentries just as the first watch reported movement in the brush.
Gripping his plasma rifle tight, Togor crept to the forest edge and dropped into a shallow trench, peering intently into the gloom. Whispers carried back to him as other soldiers took up overwatch, until a larger shadow detached itself from the trees.
A hulking Garn armored vehicle emerged, its boxy form silhouetted against the foliage. But Togor uttered a sigh of relief - it was one of their Komor class tanks, trundling forward to reinforce the new line.
As the tank ground to a halt near the perimeter, its top hatch slid open revealing the commander astride the turret. "Anything to report, Lion lead?" she asked, helmet amplifying her voice.
"All quiet so far," Togor replied. "Glad to have your firepower on our flank, but stay wary. The humans have gotten past our armor before."
She nodded grimly. "We'll be locking down at dusk. Drive safe out there, men." With that the hatch slammed shut and the tank rumbled off into position, main gun scanning vigilantly through its sights.
Night quickly enveloped the forest, cloaking any movements within an impenetrable dark. The hours dragged on uneventfully as Togor made his rounds, checking in with sentries and squinting fruitlessly into the black.
A glow off in the distance hinted at some larger inhabited area still holding out against the humans, its protective fields flickering in the night sky. Togor found small comfort in knowing they were not alone on this hostile world.
In the small hours before dawn, a sharp crackle split the air. Togor spun to see a brief muzzle flash light up the forest, answered by a succession of impacts thudding into the Komor's thick armor.
"Contact, twelve o'clock!" he bellowed, diving for cover as return fire roared from the tank. The echoes of combat now reverberated through the tree line as autoguns opened up and rockets streaked overhead, searching for targets.
Togor signaled for a SitRep as heavier booms indicated the Komor slugging it out with something substantial. "Multiple infantry spotted moving west," came the report. "They're probing our line, trying to draw our focus."
Grimacing, Togor knew they had to defend both flanks. "Second squad, flank left and push them back. The rest of you, stay sharp - they'll hit us again once that tank draws their fire."
True to his prediction, no sooner had the flanking squad faded into the trees than another barrage crashed into the forest ahead. Through spray and debris, Togor caught blurry movement - humans, sprinting between the enormous detonations occurring mere meters from their position.
He opened fire, plasma bolts stitching the ground where figures had been. A squadmate went down, clutching a leg wound, but managed to tag one attacker before collapsing. Shouts indicated the flank was engaging as well, trading shots in the darkness.
Then, through the ringing in his ears, Togor heard it - the unmistakable whine of rockets powering up. "Incoming, brace for impact!" he yelled, throwing himself into the trench barely a heartbeat before multiple explosions tore through the forest.
Bursting shrapnel whipped overhead as a concentrated volley fell directly on their position. Through the smoke, Togor saw figures darting between the remaining trees, closing fast under cover of their own bombardment.
"Stand to, return fire!" he growled, taking aim once more as figures materialized out of the haze. Exchange of fire intensified as both sides fought to gain the upper hand, flashes of plasma and primitve projectiles vying to find flesh.
A booming detonation off in the trees signalled the tank had re-engaged, pounding the edge of the forest. With its support, the humans were forced to fall back under the renewed fusillade.
Silence fell once more as the echoes faded into the distance. Too many wounded lay amid the churned earth, and Togor sent for evac even as dawn's light crept over the ruins left in the humans' wake. Another defense had held, for now, but at what further cost to his dwindling forces?
The battle-scarred remnants of Togor's platoon, dug in under the hazy dawn light, nursing wounds, both physical and mental. They had held the forest line through the night, but, at what cost? More soldiers were lost, and those remaining showed wear, beyond their cycles.
Togor did his rounds, offering what encouragement he could muster, to the exhausted troops. But, his own resolve was fading under the constant strain, and rumors of mercenary contracts, beyond the frontier lines, drew his thoughts ever more.
That evening, as the medships finally arrived to evac casualties, Togor seized his chance. He requested leave to accompany the wounded, intending to push onward from there. His second, Gelnor, stepped in to assume command with reluctance, both knew staying meant risking annihilation.
The medical station, seethed with activity, tending soldiers from across the warzone. As Togor awaited clearance to depart, his roving gaze fell upon a battered detachment, entering through the sliding bay doors. Their varied assortment of armor, instilled a dangerous air, marking them as something other than regular line troops.
Togor approached boldly. "You there - mercenaries, yes? I seek employment beyond this place. My skills could prove an asset to your outfit."
The apparent leader sized him up critically. "You'd last a tenth-cycle out there, garrison guard. We take only the willing to fight and die as need be."
Undeterred, Togor grasped at this chance for escape. "My will remains unbroken, though my current post has tested it sorely. Give me a cycle under your command, if, after that, you judge me unfit, I walk away with no dispute."
A long moment passed, as the mercenary deliberated, his hardened gaze seeing deeper than years alone. At last, he grunted and extended a gauntleted hand. "You've got spunk soldier. A cycle it is, but heed me well. Out there, the only law is kill or be killed."
Within the hour, Togor found himself leaving the station behind, amongst the mercenary columns. They moved with through the barren wilderness landscapes, answering only to contracts far beyond military oversight. An unfamiliar sense of freedom, began to take root, alongside the uncertainties of his new life.
Their headquarters sprawled within an ancient urban ruin, repurposed as a bastion, dotted with defensive emplacements and heavy weapons. Inside, Togor was ushered to the commander's office and introduced formally.
A hulking Uridian warlord presided from behind a scarred metal desk, eying the newcomer appraisingly. "So, you're the latest stray Lantor drug in from the slaughter fields. Make no mistake, this is no place for weaklings or cowards. Your trial begins at first light.
Rising dawn found Togor geared and ready, alongside a squad of mixed mercenaries, embarking into the border zones under a veteran scout's guidance. Their patrol route wound through crumbling valleys and forest fastnesses, ever probing for signs of enemy harbored within.
Midway through the cycle, as they paused to reconnoiter a likely ambush point, the scout signaled silently. Movement flickered in the treeline beyond, humans, moving stealthy. A hand signal passed the order, and the squad melted into the brush, ready to engage.
As the first shots cracked out, Togor felt strangely liberated, releasing months of pent frustrations through disciplined action once more. This new life of danger, yet freedom from military bureaucracy, was one he found he could grow into, given time. His trial had begun in earnest, amidst the perpetual storm of the frontier wars, and, for now, it was enough.

The booming thunder of artillery shook the trench walls, as Togor peered through the drifting smoke, searching for targets. Another barrage crashed overhead, raining dirt and shrapnel onto the huddled soldiers.
"Incoming!" Togor yelled, bracing for impact. A shell struck close by, deafening screams mingling with the roar. When the dust settled, two soldiers lay still, their lives crushed in an instant.
Togor gripped his plasma rifle tighter, fury, and fear, fueling his resolve. The humans had been hammering their position all night.
The hardened dirt of the trench wall dug into Togor's back as another barrage of explosions rocked the ground above. He clutched his plasma rifle closer, its familiar surface the only thing steadying his nerves as the humans rained destruction down upon their position once more.
As the bombardment continued, Togor gazed down the line at his fellow soldiers. Their normally pale orange skin had taken on a sickly yellow hue in the dim light of the trench, and dark circles seemed forever etched under every set of eyes. Illness and exhaustion were taking as heavy a toll as the enemy fire ever could.
When the shelling finally ceased, Togor let out a shaky breath and chanced a look over the edge of the trench. The familiar landscape of gnarled tree stumps and craters as far as the eye could see gave no clues to justify the next target. But the humans had proven time and again they didn't need clear lines of sight to hit their marks.
"All clear, men. Stay alert for the counter-battery," Togor called down the line, earning weary nods in return. As platoon leader, he tried to bolster morale with regular communication, but even he found it growing harder each day.
A scraping sound down the trench pulled Togor's attention. He made his way over to find Belex helping another soldier, Nemsor, into a seated position against the wall of the trench. Nemsor's chest heaved with effort just to breathe, his respiratory infection undoubtedly worsening under the stress.
"How is he?" Togor asked gently.
Belex shook his head. "It's the plague, sir. I've given him everything in my medkit but it may not be enough out here."
Togor grimaced. They were all at the mercy of primitive human bioweapons, separated from proper care by kilometers of hostile terrain. "You've done well, Belex. See if you can get him stabilized until evac, then get some rest yourself."
A spluttering cough echoed up the trench then, drawing their attention further down. Two more soldiers were huddled on the trench floor, hacking violently while a third tried in vain to comfort them.
Togor's hearts sank at the sight. "All assigned to this sector have fallen ill," he muttered, more to himself than Belex. An idea formed as he watched the plague spread its insidious grip along his line.
Spinning on his heel, Togor marched back to the command post dug into the forward edge of the trench. A patched-together comm system cluttered one corner, and he squatted down to activate it. "Command, this is Lion lead. Sector Crimson is compromised, over."
Static answered for a long moment before a tinny voice responded. "Copy that Lion lead, what is the status of your position?"
Togor steeled himself before responding. "The human bioweapons have taken hold along my entire line, sir. At least two-thirds of my soldiers are incapacitated due to sickens. We cannot hold this position."
A longer stretch of static followed as high command undoubtedly mulled their dwindling options. Supply lines were overtaxed just keeping them all fed, let alone transporting the sick. But abandon this stretch of trench would leave their flank exposed to human probing attacks.
At last, the voice crackled back. "Understood Lion lead. Fall back one click and establish a new perimeter defense. We'll divert support as able to your sector for defense and medical aid. Command out."
Togor let out a long breath as he ended the transmission. The order had been the only reasonable choice, but that made pulling out of a defended position no easier. He scrambled back up the trench to begin rallying the able and organizing the infirm for evacuation.
Two hours of grueling labor followed as they dismantled what security they had built and prepared to withdraw under the ever-present threat of human detection. Working teams stripped supplies and armaments from the trench while others aided the sick in making the painful trek to the rear.
By the time the retreat began in earnest under cover of darkness, over half of Togor's platoon was unfit to fight. He fell in with the rearguard, anxiously scanning the night for enemy movement as they shuffled the bulky bioscanners used to detect biological and chemical agents thrown off by suffering soldiers. So far, all scopes remained calm.
A rustling off to the left drew Togor's attention as another round of ragged coughing erupted from the treeline. He dashed over with a couple soldiers to find a lone private collapsed in the undergrowth, shivering fiercely even as sweat poured off his brow.
"It's Liser," one of the soldiers stated grimly. Togor knelt to grasp Liser's shoulder, causing the soldier to crack open clouded eyes.
"Sir, can't go on," he croaked through chattering teeth. Togor grimaced, but there would be no saving this one out here.
"Rest easy, private. You've served with honor." Togor produced his sidearm and placed the cool muzzle against Liser's temple, holding the soldier's gaze calmly until the end. A muted cough was the last sound before stillness overtook his form.
Rising stiffly, Togor turned back to the march. They had lost too many already without delaying further. Ahead, the first edges of dawn hinted at the new lines they must struggle to maintain, though against what fresh horrors only the new day would reveal.
The newly established perimeter line snaked along the edge of a dense forest, its gnarled trunks casting deep shadows even under the harsh light of Vega. Togor oversaw the last defenses being dug as daylight faded, already dreading the nightly bombardments to come.
At least here they had cover and concealment lacking on the open frontier. But the forests also hid opportunistic enemies, as Togor well knew. He headed to brief the sentries just as the first watch reported movement in the brush.
Gripping his plasma rifle tight, Togor crept to the forest edge and dropped into a shallow trench, peering intently into the gloom. Whispers carried back to him as other soldiers took up overwatch, until a larger shadow detached itself from the trees.
A hulking Garn armored vehicle emerged, its boxy form silhouetted against the foliage. But Togor uttered a sigh of relief - it was one of their Komor class tanks, trundling forward to reinforce the new line.
As the tank ground to a halt near the perimeter, its top hatch slid open revealing the commander astride the turret. "Anything to report, Lion lead?" she asked, helmet amplifying her voice.
"All quiet so far," Togor replied. "Glad to have your firepower on our flank, but stay wary. The humans have gotten past our armor before."
She nodded grimly. "We'll be locking down at dusk. Drive safe out there, men." With that the hatch slammed shut and the tank rumbled off into position, main gun scanning vigilantly through its sights.
Night quickly enveloped the forest, cloaking any movements within an impenetrable dark. The hours dragged on uneventfully as Togor made his rounds, checking in with sentries and squinting fruitlessly into the black.
A glow off in the distance hinted at some larger inhabited area still holding out against the humans, its protective fields flickering in the night sky. Togor found small comfort in knowing they were not alone on this hostile world.
In the small hours before dawn, a sharp crackle split the air. Togor spun to see a brief muzzle flash light up the forest, answered by a succession of impacts thudding into the Komor's thick armor.
"Contact, twelve o'clock!" he bellowed, diving for cover as return fire roared from the tank. The echoes of combat now reverberated through the tree line as autoguns opened up and rockets streaked overhead, searching for targets.
Togor signaled for a SitRep as heavier booms indicated the Komor slugging it out with something substantial. "Multiple infantry spotted moving west," came the report. "They're probing our line, trying to draw our focus."
Grimacing, Togor knew they had to defend both flanks. "Second squad, flank left and push them back. The rest of you, stay sharp - they'll hit us again once that tank draws their fire."
True to his prediction, no sooner had the flanking squad faded into the trees than another barrage crashed into the forest ahead. Through spray and debris, Togor caught blurry movement - humans, sprinting between the enormous detonations occurring mere meters from their position.
He opened fire, plasma bolts stitching the ground where figures had been. A squadmate went down, clutching a leg wound, but managed to tag one attacker before collapsing. Shouts indicated the flank was engaging as well, trading shots in the darkness.
Then, through the ringing in his ears, Togor heard it - the unmistakable whine of rockets powering up. "Incoming, brace for impact!" he yelled, throwing himself into the trench barely a heartbeat before multiple explosions tore through the forest.
Bursting shrapnel whipped overhead as a concentrated volley fell directly on their position. Through the smoke, Togor saw figures darting between the remaining trees, closing fast under cover of their own bombardment.
"Stand to, return fire!" he growled, taking aim once more as figures materialized out of the haze. Exchange of fire intensified as both sides fought to gain the upper hand, flashes of plasma and primitve projectiles vying to find flesh.
A booming detonation off in the trees signalled the tank had re-engaged, pounding the edge of the forest. With its support, the humans were forced to fall back under the renewed fusillade.
Silence fell once more as the echoes faded into the distance. Too many wounded lay amid the churned earth, and Togor sent for evac even as dawn's light crept over the ruins left in the humans' wake. Another defense had held, for now, but at what further cost to his dwindling forces?
The battle-scarred remnants of Togor's platoon, dug in under the hazy dawn light, nursing wounds, both physical and mental. They had held the forest line through the night, but, at what cost? More soldiers were lost, and those remaining showed wear, beyond their cycles.
Togor did his rounds, offering what encouragement he could muster, to the exhausted troops. But, his own resolve was fading under the constant strain, and rumors of mercenary contracts, beyond the frontier lines, drew his thoughts ever more.
That evening, as the medships finally arrived to evac casualties, Togor seized his chance. He requested leave to accompany the wounded, intending to push onward from there. His second, Gelnor, stepped in to assume command with reluctance, both knew staying meant risking annihilation.
The medical station, seethed with activity, tending soldiers from across the warzone. As Togor awaited clearance to depart, his roving gaze fell upon a battered detachment, entering through the sliding bay doors. Their varied assortment of armor, instilled a dangerous air, marking them as something other than regular line troops.
Togor approached boldly. "You there - mercenaries, yes? I seek employment beyond this place. My skills could prove an asset to your outfit."
The apparent leader sized him up critically. "You'd last a tenth-cycle out there, garrison guard. We take only the willing to fight and die as need be."
Undeterred, Togor grasped at this chance for escape. "My will remains unbroken, though my current post has tested it sorely. Give me a cycle under your command, if, after that, you judge me unfit, I walk away with no dispute."
A long moment passed, as the mercenary deliberated, his hardened gaze seeing deeper than years alone. At last, he grunted and extended a gauntleted hand. "You've got spunk soldier. A cycle it is, but heed me well. Out there, the only law is kill or be killed."
Within the hour, Togor found himself leaving the station behind, amongst the mercenary columns. They moved with through the barren wilderness landscapes, answering only to contracts far beyond military oversight. An unfamiliar sense of freedom, began to take root, alongside the uncertainties of his new life.
Their headquarters sprawled within an ancient urban ruin, repurposed as a bastion, dotted with defensive emplacements and heavy weapons. Inside, Togor was ushered to the commander's office and introduced formally.
A hulking Uridian warlord presided from behind a scarred metal desk, eying the newcomer appraisingly. "So, you're the latest stray Lantor drug in from the slaughter fields. Make no mistake, this is no place for weaklings or cowards. Your trial begins at first light.
Rising dawn found Togor geared and ready, alongside a squad of mixed mercenaries, embarking into the border zones under a veteran scout's guidance. Their patrol route wound through crumbling valleys and forest fastnesses, ever probing for signs of enemy harbored within.
Midway through the cycle, as they paused to reconnoiter a likely ambush point, the scout signaled silently. Movement flickered in the treeline beyond, humans, moving stealthy. A hand signal passed the order, and the squad melted into the brush, ready to engage.
As the first shots cracked out, Togor felt strangely liberated, releasing months of pent frustrations through disciplined action once more. This new life of danger, yet freedom from military bureaucracy, was one he found he could grow into, given time. His trial had begun in earnest, amidst the perpetual storm of the frontier wars, and, for now, it was enough.

When the monks of the Dragon Sanctuary first came down from their home in the mountains of the east a year ago with with 5 mysterious containers, they drew the attention of damn near everyone, with the news spreading like wildfire across nearly every continent. Many had their skepticisms, after all members of an isolationist religion suddenly coming down and traveling across small towns and villages asking to meet with their older children and young adults in private is certainly enough to raise concerns, but ultimately the monks proved harmless. They bounced between several towns, villages, cities big and small, harming hamlets, anywhere where one may find people and showed them the contents of the decadent containers that were always kept secure like grand treasures worth more than everything a king owned: dragon eggs. But those who were allowed to look, and even touch, these eggs knew there was something off about them: they were impossibly warm, teeming with life below the shell that could burst free at any moment, but it felt as though they chose to wait for the right time, or the right person. The more magically inclined could also tell the eggs contained magic the likes of which even the children of the most talented mages said couldn't compete with anything they'd seen. As the monks continued to travel, they brought less and less containers with them, until one day they returned to their monastery without a word to the outside world, with the only thing people knew about their mission being that 5 new people joined them in the mountains.
You are one of these 5 new people, one of the lucky people who touched the eggs and were gifted with a mark, followed by the egg hatching before your very eyes. The monks explained how you were chosen by the dragons, the mark bonded you and the newborn by the very soul: your pain would be their pain, their love would be your love, and their power would be your power. The dragons would grow fast, and so would your strength, so the monks offered you a home near their monastery, an academy where you could learn to harness your newfound strength and bond to its fullest. With that, you accepted, and in the year it took for the rest of the Bonded to be found and you to travel to the academy, the dragon had grown to the size of a horse, and your own abilities were something to behold.
(Yes I did grow up on The Inheritance Cycle books, how could you tell?)
-----_---------------_----
Hello hello everyone! I'm looking to run a campaign with your characters as one of The Bonded mentioned in the preamble above, and their journey of growing stronger with their fellow Bonded and scaled companions to become a force for good in the world. I'll go straight to the important information:
°Time: Thursdays weekly at 9:30pm EST
°Level: 5th
°Notable restrictions: Drake Warden Ranger (it just creates weird issues with the core premise), warforged/autognome and reborn doesn't gel super well with the whole thing of The Bonded all being random people, but mechanically they're allowed, just not the flavor). Everything else official is allowed, and even homebrew options, more often than not, will be allowed
°Homebrew Prevalence: Heavy to very heavy. I'm gonna be using a homebrew system for the dragon companions, and homebrew is generally gonna be very, very prominent in not just the setting and mechanics, but in nearly every aspect.
°Beginner friendliness: Not very, like I said the amount of homebrew things used is likely gonna be a lot for those less experienced with the game, but if you believe you can handle it, be my guest.
°What to expect: The campaign is intended to be about 60% roleplay, 40% combat, with a massive emphasis being put on player to player roleplay. Because of that, expect long and even short rests to actually take up a very non-insignificant amount of playtime in order to facilitate such interactions. Combats will focus more on storytelling and letting your characters shine than having much of an emphasis on difficulty. Because of that, expect to get away with a lot more than you'd normally expect via things like called shots, more ingenuic usage of spells or regular class features, environmental interaction, etc. I really do want to avoid the usual humdrum 5e combat tends to devolve into of everyone standing in place and rolling dice until a number hits 0. As for the campaign itself, the idea is the party will be bouncing all across the world, solving all kinds of issues your run of the mill adventurers just couldn't really manage in an effort to not only grow, but help make the world a better, safer place. So expect more a series of various side quests rather than a more connected string of missions (at least at first).
°If you have any further questions, do let me know in the comments of this post and I will do my best to answer them promptly
Applications will be handled in the following Google doc, I look forward to seeing people's interest! https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfAWoTVy1s5U6XH5jGivpOo0JZ1sxy6yxNHdoCEYyAKQXgmqw/viewform?usp=sf_link

I’m not sure where else to post this, or if what’s been going on with me is even covid related, but here’s the breakdown:
I got covid in the summer of 2023. I had gotten covid prior to that as well, and it seemed relatively mild. However, about 3 months later in late summer, I developed parosmia and a distorted sense of taste. I also started noticing some numbness in my left foot, which then travelled up my leg and became numbness on my left thigh. The numbness travelled further and I felt it in my left pointer finger, up my shoulder, down my shoulder blade, and onto the left side of my head.
Two months ago, my face on the left side began feeling numb. I went to the ER and had CT scans and blood work done—all which came back normal. No sign of tumors, cancer, or stroke that could be detected. I was prescribed Gabapentin. I started taking the Gabapentin and kept taking it until I ran out—and oh my god, that’s when I realized how painful my numbness had become.
I am back on more Gabapentin, which has subsided most of my pain, but I am still experiencing numbness on the left side. I also experience a lot of weakness and popping on my left side—my hip, knee, shoulder, elbow, ankle, neck, and wrist all have started popping every now and then with some pain & shakiness. My left ear also seems clogged—I will sometimes hear it pop a bit, but for the most part, it feels congested. Other symptoms I’ve had unrelated to my numbness is stomach pain, dizziness, headaches, diarrhea, fatigue, brain fog, and feeling generally unwell most days.
I am 23 and have gone to doctors in the past for chronic fatigue, some stomach issues, and chronic active epstein barr, but I feel like I have been deteriorating ever since I noticed my warped sense of smell/taste. The pain only seems to be getting worse. I have an upcoming follow-up appointment with a neurologist, but when I saw him the first time, he basically said “wow, I don’t know what could be causing this, you’re so young you shouldn’t have this” and just gave me more Gabapentin.
I’m not sure what to do, and I have lots of health anxiety that makes me constantly worried there is something really bad happening. Has anyone else experienced any of these symptoms?
TL;DR: Have been having numbness, pain, popping, and aches on my left side body, which has also spread to my face. I had a clean CT and blood work, am on nerve medication, but don’t know what seems to be wrong.

Hello everybody! I recently broke up with my LDR partner and while I still think that love is a really wonderful thing, I thought I'd maybe pen down some of my thoughts as a sort of big sister advice before I leave the sub for good. :) So here we go!:

1. Find alignment in your life goals as soon as possible, including a timeline to close the distance eventually. If you do not share a mutual goal that both of you can work towards, it will chip away at your relationship with time. The longer you let yourself "go with the flow", the more you'll feel like you're stuck in a state of limbo with regards to your present life, and if one partner wants it more than the other, resentment starts to build and that's not healthy. These conversations are difficult to have (and initiate) but the right partner would be more than happy to work through everything with you, because you are working towards building a life together. Taking baby steps together to work towards a mutual goal is better than standing still and hoping for a lucky break. This could mean picking up new skills to eventually land a job nearer to your partner, researching on visas and housing, etc etc. You can always choose to try!
2. Actions speak louder than words. In a LDR, it is very easy to mask one's true self - you choose your call, message, and trip times and these are pockets of time where one can be on their best behaviour. Instead, let your partner's actions speak for themselves. In moments of crisis, what do they choose to do? When you voice concerns / your needs, how do they react? Are they consistent with their behaviour? It is easy to get caught up in a fantasy especially when you have to mentally fill in the gaps of what your partner would be like in the times when you are not together digitally or physically. I've always believed that you have to love your partner as who they are in totality, the good and the bad, not what they potentially could be.
3. Trust is the cornerstone of all relationships, and especially so in a LDR where you cannot physically be with them all the time. Communicate your needs and boundaries early on to each other instead of wanting to be the "cool" partner (I am guilty of this myself). If there are incidents that occur where trust has been broken, both parties need to 1) make a choice whether to continue the relationship, and if so, 2) mend the relationship through communication and actions instead of sweeping things under the rug. I caught my partner lying a few times and swept it under the rug, and in retrospect, whenever I tried to bring up the insecurities that resulted from those incidents or the incidents themselves, my partner would turn it against me and focus more on how they didn't like that I was upset etc. Sadly, I left the relationship thinking that I never truly knew who my partner was at all. In a LDR where the odds are greatly stacked against you, it is essential for there to be trust and healthy communication.
4. Be creative! Despite being in a LDR, there are many tools and resources available for you to strengthen your relationship. I used to love preparing and receiving mini surprises, such as sneaking gifts / notes in your partner's suitcase for them to find and read later, sending random "just because" food or gift deliveries over, creating websites / videos / digital drawings for them via surprise emails or messages. There are also many tips in this subreddit for fun date ideas beyond just a Facetime call, including games, online escape rooms, etc. I find it endearing that a LDR makes you extra creative when it comes to making your partner happy and furthering your relationship :) It may seem small to you but may mean the world to your partner (and vice versa)!

Looking back, while the breakup was painful for me, I've also grown a lot as a person and I am clearer now as to what I want and don't want in a relationship, LDR or not. I still truly believe that a connection separated by distance but sustained through effort and communication is beautiful and I still feel happy reading all of your posts :) I wish everyone nothing but the best - always remember that YOU are an amazing person and you deserve all the happiness in the world <3 Sending lots of love and hugs always, and my mailbox is always open if you need to chat! :)

Im 3 weeks po and had laparoscopic and abdominal. Everything is steadily healing but im surprised how long my laparoscopic incisions are taking!
The one on the right side (where they did 2 incisions) in particular has given me so much trouble. It seemed to not be closed up as well as everything else and is my main source of discomfort throughout the healing process.
This incision and the belly button one have been in scab mode the last week. The scab has been falling off the belly button one fine but today the scab started coming off my troublesome laparoscopic incision and it doesn’t seem healed. I can see fresh blood under it and because its half on/ half off its super irritating and uncomfortable. No gushing blood or anything luckily.
I put a smooth piece of sterile pad over it and its sort of helping but man what a pain. My dr recommended trying laparoscopic because its supposed to be faster healing process. She said most people feel totally better in 2 weeks but honestly i cant see it - those are the incision have given me the most trouble!
Ironically my abdominal incision is fine. I can see a lil bright red when i lift up my stomach, and im gonna have a scar for sure but its not nearly as bad as the other incisions!
What was your experience with incision healing?

i’ve been taking a progesterone only pill for about 5 months now. most symptoms have cleared up but i still get some severe bouts of nausea and headaches everyday, they’re bareable headaches but just annoying. i have been stressing thinking im pregnant because of the nausea. i have been pregnant before and i have no other symptoms from when i was (no implantation bleeding, no sore breasts, not any more emotional than usual, not overly tired) i was just wondering is this normal? i love that this pill stops my periods because ive struggled with the most painful periods before hand but the nausea and headaches are really starting to interfere and make me worry more than usual. i haven’t had intercourse in over a month so i know id be feeling more than i am now if i was pregnant. im too scared to take a genuine test because it puts me back in the headspace of when i was pregnant (not good lol) just wanted to know if anyone’s experienced the same or anyone has any ‘professional’ help!

(Obligatory sorry for formatting, I’m on Mobile)•••••I’m 22 he’s 21••••• Y’all idek, I feel like I’m going crazy? I come from a family of 4 he’s from a family of 7. My parents are terrible, mostly my dad but my mom was either working or passive so unfortunately that man is most of my childhood, I can count on one hand how many times she was like “ok you’re doin too much” and it had to be egregious one being he tried to shave me bald in elementary school because he told me to wrap my hair while holding the wrap so I said “? I am?” He took it as sass you get the gist. ••••• His parents? Are terrible? And so they raised his siblings to be…kinda terrible? They’re good people (all older than him) but like they definitely have their parents tendencies and they’ll lash out over dumb things like “this sandwich has been here three days I’m gonna eat it” silence, a few minutes pass, he’s eating OlderBro: yo! What the f!!! Who said you could eat that snatches it from him “I literally asked” “well I didn’t hear! starts eating angrily like how do you eat angry bro? ••••• Just things like that, so his parents offered me help when I lost my house (RM couldn’t pay the rent anymore and housing is dumb expensive I couldn’t just spawn in double) I was hesitant cause I’d heard stories but it was either that or a homeless shelter and when I tell you I should’ve picked the shelter, never thought I’d say that. Anytime a dish is used it must be washed immediately, if you get a glass of juice either chug it or dump it cause if it touches the counter you’re in trouble (because they have a large dog that they refuse to stop letting countersurf, and i guess the dogs more important than their human children) but!!! His parents don’t wash their dishes, and then make the kids wash the dishes 😭 they got upset my bf and I were spending money to get takeout, remember that ok. •••••She goes on this fit about how we need to buy food for everyone or stop and tell the delivery people to be careful because they dropped the food off, but she was walking her dog instead of yknow grabbing her lunging dog she just stands there and starts yelling at me cause “why didn’t [redacted] just come get it 😡” so my bf is like “why don’t you have a hold on your large dog so he can’t lunge at people?” She comes inside fussing cause it’s on the ground (where they’re supposed to put stuff) so the dogs being nosy trying to eat it.••••• Ok from earlier? Remember we don’t use the kitchen? After this she makes us clean the kitchen because “y’all use it and never take the initiative to clean 😡” when we literally did not use it like I can’t remember the last time I even grabbed a glass from their kitchen yall. ••••• They’re also multilingual so like it’s been pretty standard like it was with my parents so far but them being multilingual is a whole new thing. They don’t know I also speak that language (not fluent but enough to understand responding is my struggle) so they’ll talk about me in a mix of that and English but I can…I can literally understand them and I wanna respond so bad but I don’t wanna cause too much turmoil cause these aren’t my parents. ••••• Then back to the dogs, one of them the big one that countersurfs, he’s just an ahole, he keeps going through my bags and eating stuff, he ate my health insurance paperwork, he ate my bfs breakfast, so we put him away and let her know cause his stomach is weak and he will poop, she’s upset cause “she should’ve put her stuff away 😡, why are you trying to blame my dog😡” he literally went to my bag, opened the bag, pulled the ihop container out, opened the ihop container, and ate four pancakes and two chicken tenders, and instead of training him to not do that, putting him in timeout, anything you’re upset at the humans? ••••• Oh oh and! My bf games, i game, his father decided he was using too much wifi and kicked him off and said he’s leeching, sister put him on hers then said the same thing, my bf gets his own wifi we’ve used very little like 400/1200 and that’s only cause we had to update games cause we didn’t have anything for a month, and then it reset with the new month we’re currently at 20/1200 AND HIS DADS STILL GOING OVER LMFAO, “they said it’s cause we stream a lot so I’m gonna cut the wifi off twice a week”. Now he’s all upset he can’t stream and he won’t use his data I can see the gears turning like “ugh it wasn’t my kid but but I’ll still blame him cause how could it be my fault even though I’m the only one on wifi😡” so they tried to get the youngest (minor) to get our wifi on her iPad so she can stream with her mom and originally we were gonna give her wifi but I’m not giving them ANYTHING they can struggle with no wifi. ••••• So yeah, there’s more I could say but this is already disgustingly long, we’ve decided when we move out we’re going NC/LC •(and I’m so serious when I say they will not be seeing their grandkids, I’m gonna block socials and everything cause I’ll be damned if she show up at the hospital or the baby shower, told him that since they’re his parents he can decide on the wedding but if they are there I’m not being cordial and they don’t get any of the photos)• ••••• But the waiting game is so hard, jobs are playing rn I’m sure you know if you’re job hunting rn, and rent is dumb expensive. Oh and!!! They’re telling us to hurry up and get out and save but they’re taking $1000 a month from us as “rent” aka his dads unemployed and so they get an extra $3000 a month if they just charge everyone $500 in rent. They’re so exhausting like why don’t nparents ever shut up, they’ll hate you and then force themselves into your life like??? Misery loves company but I don’t back up. Edit: idk if I can curse so censored myself and fixed some typos

Whenever I'm sleeping I end up feeling like a knife or something is pushed into my body giving me this excruciating pain. My stomach, legs, chest, back, sides. I have not dealt with this type of dream in a long time.
There was a time in my life when I would have these experiences every night. It got to the point where I would be soo scared to sleep i would stay up; dreading i had to close my eyes. I didn't want to feel the pain again. I'll struggle to grunt from the pain, try to move to react to the pain but it feels like my movements get restrained. Just me fight these pain sensation. I don't wish anyone to ever feel pain like this just never ending pain.
When these experiences started happening about 3 years ago. I got a job with a lot of responsibilities and no way I could smoke (green) anymore and I didn't drink; my choice. I watched buildings to secure them. I felt good. I was working out, eating well, I put my heart into everything I do. Then.. it started happening. the first time I didn't think anything of it... but then it happen again. I eventually woke up and I remember just sitting up in silence processing what just happened. Wtf? again? this doesn't feel good at all. it feels so real it hurts. Then it got to the point where as soon as I would go back to sleep the sensations would start again and I would feel like I'm being tortured. Every pain receptor going off. one part of me to the next. Night after night after night. I remember eventually just giving up and letting go and accepting the pain. I woke up. I ended up leaving my job soon after for something less serious and started sparking up again and having a few drinks. Eventually they went away.
I continued life. I worked out, ate well, started a bunch of hobbies & have been enjoying myself. I paint acrylic, do photography, engrave, kayak, fish, cook full course meals, made necklaces bracelets, studied anything and everything that came to mind I'm always fascinating with the world around me. I'm always where I need to be no matter where I end up I help people, connect with them on a deep level.
Few years later ( present times) I forgot about those sensations, those dreams. I've got to a point where I want to get a better job, make more money and impact the world because I got the ability to. I stopped drinking and smoking. Things have been fine. I've been preparing myself to get a better job and live life without smoking and drinking. Took a little to stop drinking but I eventually got to a point where I had no craving for smoke and alcohol. I'm proud of myself!! My life has been one crazy ride which is why I smoked and sipped but I moved on; I've been Looking forward. And grateful for my life experiences. They made me who I am today.
Yesterday was an ordinary day. I'm trying to set myself up, planning where I'm going to work. Looking forward to a new chapter because life's exciting. I went to bed..... the dream and the sensations happened a couple hours after I went to bed. I woke up slightly but fell back to sleep shrugged it off... boom ... torture...I couldn't move I could barely get a grunt out from the pain. I somehow was able to wake myself up. It's 5:30 am. I didn't go back to bed I decided to stay up get myself ready. Take a shower, drove to a dinner and had breakfast even asked to see what position are available and what the rates were just because I liked the place. It was a nice talk. I'm home now...I'm feeling tired now. Im scared to go to sleep I don't want to experience those sensations of being tortured again. I forgot all about them and now it's happening again.....................fuck.
I dont want to drink I don't want to smoke..................fuck..........fuck...........fuck.
Can anyone relate? Am i the only one?
I'm scared to sleep again.

We had been together 4 years & around each other almost 24/7 as lived in a small apt & nearly 3 years was FT WFH during COVID. I was 12 years older than him & never thought he would pass before me. He got sick this last year- pain & the swelling legs as his liver wasn’t doing well. He had such skinny legs but they looked like elephants the year before he died. My dad died of same thing but was old so I assumed since my BF was so young he could come out of it. Then his kidneys were barely working & we were told he had a week to live in home hospice- he made it a month. He wouldn’t let his family help him use bathroom so I was helping him pee in buckets as swelling caused pee to go everywhere. I had to wipe his butt & clean him. The night before he died the fluid was backing up & mucus filled his mouth & nose. I was up entire night wiping his face every 10 min as green snot kept coming from his nose. I knew it was close to the end & was holding onto his shoulder when he died. I never saw it ending like this. My life is a mess now as I’m struggling w the loss & not doing what I need to take care of.
If you find yourself body swelling & holding water in legs & stomach please get help. You have to stop as you may not have as much time as you think.

Hello,
I have been having breast pain for the last 6 months. It’s bilateral and nothing makes it better. But it’s so intense I cannot wear clothes or a bra. Unfortunately I do end up doing both of those for work, but it’s painful. Can’t touch them. Can’t lay on my stomach. But it’s only for about 2 weeks out of the month that they are this painful. Finally got into the doctor. She sent me for an ultrasound. I have extensive family history. Results showed 2 oval like masses, which are likely benign given my age. (29F) since I have such extensive history of cancer and the pain my doctor wants to send me to a breast surgeon now. Waiting on that referral. Has anyone had this happen? I do self exams pretty regularly and didn’t even feel anything! Both masses are in one breast. Just looking for stories of similar or maybe what to expect next. I’m worried and have a hard time just hearing because of my age it’s benign when my family has gotten breast cancer young. 😭

For many years, I struggled under the weight of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS), which encompassed a host of debilitating symptoms. My journey included chronic digestive issues like SIBO and diarrhea, relentless back pain, and the most challenging of all—brain fog. When I mention brain fog, many people don’t understand its severity. I felt perpetually drunk without the fun part, grappling with concentration problems, memory issues, ADD/ADHD symptoms, and episodes of depersonalization and derealization. I couldn’t function and ultimately had to give up my job as a physiotherapist. It was a cruel irony—how could I help others when I couldn’t even fix my own pain?
In my quest for answers, I saw numerous doctors and underwent every conceivable test, from blood work and MRIs to lumbar punctures and colonoscopies. Despite being diagnosed with Lyme disease and undergoing antibiotic treatment, my symptoms persisted. I tried everything: different diets, more exercise, yoga, Wim Hof breathing, ice baths, meditation retreats, psychedelics, and even Kambo, a frog poison purported to have healing properties. Each attempt led me deeper into despair, until I was bedridden and suicidal.
Then, I discovered “The Body Keeps the Score.” This book was a turning point. It helped me understand that while my illness had physical triggers, the chronic nature of my suffering was deeply rooted in my psyche. Initially skeptical, I delved into limbic system disorders and the polyvagal theory, recognizing myself in these explanations.
My healing journey began with education. Reading books by John Sarno was transformative. If I could meet him, I’d hug him for saving my life. My second step was shifting my goal from fixing myself to cultivating a sense of safety. It wasn’t about repeating hollow affirmations but acknowledging the truth of my circumstances. Despite the pains, uncertainties, and daily stresses, I learned to find moments of safety. In my bed, free from immediate threats, I trained my brain to feel safe right now.
Crucially, I didn’t suppress my emotions. Instead, I used tools like JournalSpeak, recommended by Nicole Sachs, to process my feelings. Within days, I felt as if I had been delivered from demons. Although I’m not completely cured, I’m almost there and plan to work with professionals to delve deeper into my trauma and conflicts.
To anyone struggling like I did, remember: you are not broken. Your body is trying to protect you, albeit too well. My healing path involved three steps:

1. Education: Understanding the mind-body connection. 2. Setting a Different Goal: Focusing on feeling safe rather than fixing myself. 3. Trusting the Process: Believing in my body’s innate healing capabilities. 

It’s your birthright to thrive. Embrace your journey with trust and authenticity.

TNA 2008+ (Post Bound for Glory 2008) Part 1: First 4 weeks of TV and PPV card
You can find these more digestible to read with graphics for the PPV card here: https://bethebooker.net/thread/2357/tna-2008
Diary Start Date: October 16, 2008, The fall out from TNA Bound for Glory 2008
Note: This diary will not contain any knockouts or womens wrestling as to be perfectly honest I have never cared or connected with womens wrestling at all. I'm sorry if this upsets or offends anyone I just wanted to be honest.
TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting
TNA X-DivisioN Champion: Sheik Abdul Bashier
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money
Weekly Shows:
TNA Impact! - Thursdays on Spike TV
TNA Xplosion - Fridays on TNAWrestling.com and TNA's Youtube Channel
WEEK 1 TNA IMPACT October 16 2008
Segment 1:
Sting cuts a promo celebrating his newly won TNA World Heavyweight Championship from Samoa Joe at Bound For Glory. His promo is interrupted by AJ Styles who says that it's time for TNA to continue to evolve and move forward, he puts over the homegrown TNA talent and the guys who come up and are coming up from the indies. He says that another world title run with a guy like Sting is a step backwards and TNA needs to look forward with the future of this business. Styles says if Joe can't lead them, then it's time for himself to step up. He's cut off by Booker T who mocks AJ for implying he's anywhere near ready for a world championship match when Booker just beat AJ and Christian Cage in a Triple Threat at BFG. AJ and Booker argue back and forth before ultimately deciding for a one on one match in tonight's main event.
Match 1:
TNA World Tag Team Champions Beer Money (James Storm and Robert Roode) DEF. Eric Young and Shark Boy via pinfall from Roode onto Young at 8 minutes
After the match, Storm and Roode have already exited the ring and headed to the back, Shark Boy is reluctantly headed to the back selling his injuries, Eric Young is just playing into the crowds cheers while they applaud him for his effort while CHRISTOPHER DANIELS jumps the guard rail and slides into the ring and beats down Eric Young and hits Young with the BME as the crowd boos.
Segment 2:
Backstage interview with TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier who cuts a promo on his opponent he defeated at BFG Concequences Creed and Creed's tag team partner Jay Lethal who won the #1 contendership for the X Division title at BFG, issuing the challenge to Jay Lethal for next week
Match 2:
Rhino DEF. Sonjay Dutt via pinfall in a squash match at 4 minutes
Segment 3:
Backstage interview with Scott Steiner who calls Rhino an absolute slob and taunts him for taking 4 minutes to put away someone the likes of Sonjay Dutt
Segment 4:
A video vignette plays that hypes the debut of Brodie Lee who appears to be mysterious yet cocky and likable drifter character he cuts a promo putting all of TNA on notice for his arrival coming soon.
Match 3:
Matt Morgan (w/ Abyss) DEF. Hernandez (w/ Homicide) via pinfall at 8 minutes
After the match, Homicide hops in the ring trying to argue and beef with Morgan while Morgan just smiles and laughs at the much smaller but the brave Homicide, Team 3D come down the ramp with mics in hands and say that there's clearly some tension still there from their 4-Way Tag at BFG but they can't let them get distracted by the real enemies which are Beer Money. They initiate a challenge next week where all 3 teams can resolve their issues with each other while also seeing who is the best team of the 3 when they have a triple threat #1 contenders tag match next week on Impact.
Segment 5:
Christian Cage cuts an in ring promo and goes over what AJ Styles said earlier about guys coming and taking spots from the homefrown guys, he says he felt slightly offended by what AJ said as after everything he and AJ have been through, he still considers them friends. He says that he wants to make one thing clear and that is that no matter how it may look, Christian has never been just "given" a spot in any promotion and he has busted his ass off to become as good as he's become.
He's cut off by Kevin Nash who mocks Cage from the entrance ramp and says that Christian shouldn't worry about something so stupid, he mocks Christian for the way he views the business where Nash clearly just views it as a way to make as much money as possible. The two have a promo battle with Nash just dismissing Christian and shaking his head and walking away, claiming Christian isn't "worth it"
Match 4:
Concequences Creed (w/ Jay Lethal) DEF. Johnny Devine via pinfall at 8 minutes
Segment 5:
We get a run down from Don West and Mike Tenay hyping up next week's episode of TNA Impact with the following matches confirmed:
TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier (c) vs. Jay Lethal 3-Way Tag #1 Contenders Match: Team 3D vs. Matt Morgan and Abyss vs. LAX The Motor City Machine Guns vs. Kaz and Petey Williams
Segment 6:
Another video package for another debut coming soon to TNA Impact, this one showcases Kenny Omega, a young up and comer out of Canada with a bright future and an even brighter personality. Omega clearly shows a goofy side while clips of his matches from other promotions play that show although he's a fun loving guy, he's dangerous in the ring.
Main Event:
AJ Styles DEF. Booker T via DQ after interference at 16 minutes
Kurt Angle, Scott Steiner, Kevin Nash and shockingly, TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting surround the ring and swarm in as Steiner and Nash beat down Styles while Kurt Angle, furiously trash Styles while Sting stands there calm and collected with sunglasses on holding the TNA World Heavyweight Championship over his shoulder.
The show comes to a close with Angle, Steiner, Nash, Sting and Booker all posing and holding each other's arms up in the ring over a beaten down AJ Styles as the crowd boos.
—-
Week 1 TNA Xplosion October 17 2008
Match 1:
Doug Williams DEF. Volador Jr. at 9 minutes
Match 2:
Lance Rock (w/ Jimmy Rave) DEF. Sylvain Grenier at 5 Minutes
Match 3:
Kaz DEF. Kip James at 12 Minutes
—-
WEEK 2 TNA IMPACT October 23 2008
« REWRITING WRESTLING HISTORY (WITHOUT USING COMPUTER GAMES) TNA 2008+ Reply
« Prev12Next » Tony Soprano Avatar Tony Soprano Lower Midcarder
May 24, 2024 at 12:21am Asaemon likes this Quote TNA Logo
Diary Start Date: October 16, 2008, The fall out from TNA Bound for Glory 2008 Note: This diary will not contain any knockouts or womens wrestling as to be perfectly honest I have never cared or connected with womens wrestling at all. I'm sorry if this upsets or offends anyone I just wanted to be honest.
TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting
TNA X-DivisioN Champion: Sheik Abdul Bashier
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money
Weekly Shows:
TNA Impact! - Thursdays on Spike TV
TNA Xplosion - Fridays on TNAWrestling.com and TNA's Youtube Channel
(As of real time as of 05/27/2024) Upcoming PPV:
TNA Turning Point 2008: November 9 2008:
TNA World Heavyweight Championship: Sting (c) vs. AJ Styles
First Time Ever, Grudge Match: Kurt Angle vs. Mick Foley
TNA World Tag Team Championships: Beer Money (James Storm and Robert Roode) (c) vs. Abyss and Matt Morgan
TNA X-Division Championship: Sheik Abdul Bashier (c) vs. Jay Lethal vs. Concequences Creed
Eric Young vs Christopher Daniels
MORE TBA!
Tony Soprano Avatar Tony Soprano Lower Midcarder
May 24, 2024 at 12:24am Asaemon likes this Quote TNA Impact! October 16 2008
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Segment 1:
Sting cuts a promo celebrating his newly won TNA World Heavyweight Championship from Samoa Joe at Bound For Glory. His promo is interrupted by AJ Styles who says that it's time for TNA to continue to evolve and move forward, he puts over the homegrown TNA talent and the guys who come up and are coming up from the indies. He says that another world title run with a guy like Sting is a step backwards and TNA needs to look forward with the future of this business. Styles says if Joe can't lead them, then it's time for himself to step up. He's cut off by Booker T who mocks AJ for implying he's anywhere near ready for a world championship match when Booker just beat AJ and Christian Cage in a Triple Threat at BFG. AJ and Booker argue back and forth before ultimately deciding for a one on one match in tonight's main event.
Match 1:
TNA World Tag Team Champions Beer Money (James Storm and Robert Roode) DEF. Eric Young and Shark Boy via pinfall from Roode onto Young at 8 minutes
After the match, Storm and Roode have already exited the ring and headed to the back, Shark Boy is reluctantly headed to the back selling his injuries, Eric Young is just playing into the crowds cheers while they applaud him for his effort while CHRISTOPHER DANIELS jumps the guard rail and slides into the ring and beats down Eric Young and hits Young with the BME as the crowd boos.
Segment 2:
Backstage interview with TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier who cuts a promo on his opponent he defeated at BFG Concequences Creed and Creed's tag team partner Jay Lethal who won the #1 contendership for the X Division title at BFG, issuing the challenge to Jay Lethal for next week
Match 2:
Rhino DEF. Sonjay Dutt via pinfall in a squash match at 4 minutes
Segment 3:
Backstage interview with Scott Steiner who calls Rhino an absolute slob and taunts him for taking 4 minutes to put away someone the likes of Sonjay Dutt
Segment 4:
A video vignette plays that hypes the debut of Brodie Lee who appears to be mysterious yet cocky and likable drifter character he cuts a promo putting all of TNA on notice for his arrival coming soon.
Match 3:
Matt Morgan (w/ Abyss) DEF. Hernandez (w/ Homicide) via pinfall at 8 minutes
After the match, Homicide hops in the ring trying to argue and beef with Morgan while Morgan just smiles and laughs at the much smaller but the brave Homicide, Team 3D come down the ramp with mics in hands and say that there's clearly some tension still there from their 4-Way Tag at BFG but they can't let them get distracted by the real enemies which are Beer Money. They initiate a challenge next week where all 3 teams can resolve their issues with each other while also seeing who is the best team of the 3 when they have a triple threat #1 contenders tag match next week on Impact.
Segment 5:
Christian Cage cuts an in ring promo and goes over what AJ Styles said earlier about guys coming and taking spots from the homefrown guys, he says he felt slightly offended by what AJ said as after everything he and AJ have been through, he still considers them friends. He says that he wants to make one thing clear and that is that no matter how it may look, Christian has never been just "given" a spot in any promotion and he has busted his ass off to become as good as he's become.
He's cut off by Kevin Nash who mocks Cage from the entrance ramp and says that Christian shouldn't worry about something so stupid, he mocks Christian for the way he views the business where Nash clearly just views it as a way to make as much money as possible. The two have a promo battle with Nash just dismissing Christian and shaking his head and walking away, claiming Christian isn't "worth it"
Match 4:
Concequences Creed (w/ Jay Lethal) DEF. Johnny Devine via pinfall at 8 minutes
Segment 5:
We get a run down from Don West and Mike Tenay hyping up next week's episode of TNA Impact with the following matches confirmed:
TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier (c) vs. Jay Lethal 3-Way Tag #1 Contenders Match: Team 3D vs. Matt Morgan and Abyss vs. LAX The Motor City Machine Guns vs. Kaz and Petey Williams
Segment 6:
Another video package for another debut coming soon to TNA Impact, this one showcases Kenny Omega, a young up and comer out of Canada with a bright future and an even brighter personality. Omega clearly shows a goofy side while clips of his matches from other promotions play that show although he's a fun loving guy, he's dangerous in the ring.
Main Event:
AJ Styles DEF. Booker T via DQ after interference at 16 minutes
Kurt Angle, Scott Steiner, Kevin Nash and shockingly, TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting surround the ring and swarm in as Steiner and Nash beat down Styles while Kurt Angle, furiously trash Styles while Sting stands there calm and collected with sunglasses on holding the TNA World Heavyweight Championship over his shoulder.
The show comes to a close with Angle, Steiner, Nash, Sting and Booker all posing and holding each other's arms up in the ring over a beaten down AJ Styles as the crowd boos.
Tony Soprano Avatar Tony Soprano Lower Midcarder
May 24, 2024 at 12:33am Asaemon likes this Quote
TNA Xplosion October 17 2008 TNA Xplosion (February 19, 2014) – Atomic Drop Match 1:
Doug Williams DEF. Volador Jr. at 9 minutes
Match 2:
Lance Rock (w/ Jimmy Rave) DEF. Sylvain Grenier at 5 Minutes
Match 3:
Kaz DEF. Kip James at 12 Minutes Tony Soprano Avatar Tony Soprano Lower Midcarder
May 24, 2024 at 10:55pm Asaemon likes this Quote TNA Impact! October 23 2008
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Match 1:
The Motor City Machine Guns (Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin) fought Kaz and Petey Williams to a contest due to interference at 5 minutes
The 4 X-Division stars are beat down by the same group who ended Impact last week Kurt Angle, Scott Steiner, Kevin Nash, Booker T and TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting
Segment 1:
The group cut a promo primarily lead by Kurt Angle and Sting. They introduce their faction as "The Main Event Mafia" and say that they're there to set the record straight in TNA - There is no "future" of TNA without first going through them. They make it adamantly clear that this is all for and all about respect which they feel these "young punks" are not giving in TNA. They say that the TNA originals and new talent that come into TNA should be kissing them at their feet and grateful for everything that they've done for this company. This shocks the crowd especially to see someone like Sting join the likes of this group who goes on to tear down Samoa Joe at BFG several weeks ago. Kevin Nash mentions that there are "some" guys that don't value their own stock the way they should and have gone soft and it gives the main event talent a bad look (obviously referring to Christian Cage's promo last week) - while Scott Steiner then says there are other non TNA originals like Rhino who are not main event level talent and aren't even "has been" levels but are "never was" level talent - Booker T begins to speak his mind in the promo but the group is cut off by AJ Styles.
AJ Styles tries to tear down the group from a distance and is angry they attacked him and beat him down last week and taunts Booker for not being able to get the job done last week on his own, he challenges Booker to a rematch tonight but Booker doesn't agree to it before Christian Cage comes out and joins AJ on his promo and calls out Nash for his comments about him - Christian Cage demands that if Booker is too cowardly for a singles match then maybe tonight's main event should be a tag team match between Christian Cage and AJ Styles against Kevin Nash and Booker T with the match being set.
Match 2:
Brodie Lee DEF. Jimmy Rave (w/ Lance Rock) at 6 minutes in Brodie's debut match
Brodie made a great first showing and was able to showcase his fast paced but heavy hitting fighting style, after the match, Lance Rock steps into the ring and squares up with Brodie before ultimately checking on Rave and picking him up and helping him up to the back.
Segment 2:
We get an in ring promo from Christopher Daniels who recently returned to the company last week and says he's spent nearly a year away forced to be out of TNA while guys like Eric Young and his boyish personality make a mockery of this sport that he loves so much. Daniels puts the entire locker room on notice and says that he's better, faster, and stronger than ever before and he'll stop at nothing to reach the top of the mountain this time in TNA.
Match 3:
Christopher Daniels DEF. Shark Boy at 7 minutes
After the match, Daniels goes to beat down Shark Boy but Eric Young comes running from the back to try and defend his friend Shark Boy but is reversed by Daniels and is once again left laid out by Christopher Daniels
Match 4:
Matt Morgan and Abyss DEF. Team 3D (Brother Ray and Brother Devon) and LAX (Hernandez and Homicide) in a #1 Contenders 3-Way Tag at 13 Minutes after Matt Morgan pins Homicide
As Morgan and Abyss celebrate in the ring, Beer Money's music hits and the TNA World Tag Team Champions look to make their ring to confront their next challengers but stop dead in their tracks as both LAX and Team 3D stand tall next to Morgan and Abyss and all 6 men just stand there just waiting for the chance to attack Beer Money as Beer Money just scoff and head to the back instead.
Segment 3:
Mick Foley has an in ring promo and verbally attacks the Main Event Mafia and says it's an ignorant and foolish concept for a group, he spends time putting over the TNA homegrown talent but is cut off by Main Event Mafia's Kurt Angle who hits the ring and gets in Foley's face and says that it's because of him that he lost to Jeff Jarrett at Bound For Glory and made him realize how much of a joke this company actually is so if anyone is to blame for the MEM as a group it's Foley, Foley looks to try and defend himself but Angle headbutts Foley instead and knocks Foley out onto his back as Jeff Jarrett's music hits before Angle can cause any more damage but Jarrett comes running into a belly to belly suplex by Kurt Angle who then relentlessly beats down Jarrett to the point TNA security comes to escort and drag Angle away as Jarrett is helped by medical staff and a slightly bloodied forehead Foley is struggling to wobble to the back.
Match 5:
TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier (c) DEF. Jay Lethal (w/ Concequences Creed) at 11 Minutes via lowblow after the ref argues with Creed after Creed tries to stop Sheik from cheating beforehand.
After the match, Creed hits the ring to try and get to Sheik but Sheik makes a run for it up the ramp with the X-Division Championship but is cut off by Jim Cornette at the entrance ramp who tears down Sheik's tactics have now cost 2 X-Division contenders a match and therefore, at the Turning Point PPV Sheik will now have to defend his championship against both Creed and Lethal in a 3-Way while Lethal and Creed smile with Sheik throwing a tantrum.
Segment 4:
We get a backstage interview with TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting being interviewed by Jeremy Borash with Sting doubling down on his new stance as a heel and says he truly believes the Main Event Mafia is a step in the right direction for not just TNA, but for this business as well. When Borash says if that's the case why did Kurt Angle just earlier tonight get dragged out of the ring like a wild animal after beating down two legends in their own right like Jeff Jarrett and Mick Foley. Sting says that both men ultimately had it coming and that they just need to trust the process, he's come to terms that Kurt knows what he's doing and will stick by his side.
MAIN EVENT:
The Main Event Mafia (Booker T and Kevin Nash) DEF. AJ Styles and Christian Cage at 12 Minutes after Scott Steiner attempted to come to the aid of Booker and Nash, Rhino attacked Steiner from behind and Christian was looking to the outside and was distracted and then turned around to get hit with a big boot and then hit with a jack knife power bomb from Kevin Nash
The show comes to a close with Nash, Booker and Steiner all posing in the ring doing a Main Event Mafia hand sign
Week 2 TNA Xplosion October 24 2008
Match 1: Amazing Red DEF. Lince Dorado at 8 Minutes
Match 2: TNA World Tag Team Champion Robert Roode (w/ James Storm) DEF. Gran Akuma at 4 Minutes
Match 3: The Motor City Machine Guns (Chris Sabin and Alex Shelley) DEF. Kaz and Petey Williams at 14 Minutes after Sabin pinned Williams
After the match, all four men shook hands in the ring.
WEEK 3 TNA IMPACT October 30 2008
Segment 1:
The opening segment is an in ring promo where Kurt Angle calls out Jeff Jarrett and says he's not finished with him yet. He says if it wasn't for TNA security he would have done a whole lot worse last week and he wants his rematch from Bound For Glory. He's cut off by Mick Foley who comes down to the entrance ramp and says that Kurt is too ignorant to realize that he doesn't truly want a rematch with Jarrett, because if that was the case he wouldn't have beaten Jarrett down so badly last week to the point he can't be medically cleared. He tears down the rest of the Mafia as well and says this whole "respect" shtick is tired and played out and they all lived through an era where a big stable of a**holes ruined and killed "another company" and Foley won't allow that to happen to TNA. He says that Angle won't get his rematch with Jarrett, but Angle will be getting a match with Foley at Turning Point!
The rest of the Main Event Mafia come out from behind and are slowly approaching and look to beat down Foley but from behind the rest of the Mafia comes down The Motor City Machine Guns, Kaz and Petey Williams! The four men who had their tag match stopped last week due to interference from the Mafia - it looks like there's about to be a massive brawl but TNA GM Jim Cornette appears on screen and calls the brawl off and announces an 8-Man Tag between Kaz/Williams/MCMG vs. The Main Event Mafia and that's gonna start ... right now!
Match 1:
The Main Event Mafia (Kurt Angle, Booker T, Kevin Nash and TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting) (w/ Scott Steiner) DEF. The Motor City Machine Guns, Petey Williams and Kaz in an 8-Man Tag via pinfall from Angle onto Williams at 9 minutes after Steiner distracted his former ally Petey Williams by taunting him from the outside.
After the match, The Main Event Mafia celebrate in the ring together as the crowd boos.
Segment 2:
There's a promo battle between TNA World Tag Team Champions Beer Money and Abyss/Matt Morgan who make their match at Turning Point next Sunday official with Beer Money trying to provoke Abyss into assaulting them outside of the match so they can report Abyss to the authorities and get him thrown back into the asylum that he was at earlier this year. Abyss is shaking in the corner and shaking his head and slightly squealing saying he won't go back. Morgan helps calm his partner down before turning to Beer Money and saying that it's true that outside of wrestling in matches, Abyss does need to keep his bet behavior. But thankfully, that rule doesn't apply to him before then kicking James Storm straight in the face with a big boot and then going for Roode who dodges and then rolls out of the ring and pulls Storm out of the ring quick while they need to try and preserve themselves for their match later tonight with Consequences Creed.
Segment 3:
Jim Cornette is backstage in his office and thanks Mick for offering to deal with Angle on a personal level. He says Mick Foley making his in ring debut for TNA against Kurt Angle in a first time ever dream match will be huge for the PPV but now he just needs to pen out the main event. Foley puts over AJ Styles huge and says he truly believes AJ is the best wrestler in the world and is everything that TNA stands for. Jim Cornette tells Foley he likes what he's thinking and that would be 2 big first time ever matches for the PPV. He tells Foley he's going to think it over.
Match 2:
Kenny Omega DEF. Kiyoshi in 5 minutes
This was Omega's first match as a signed TNA wrestler and he made a great showing as he celebrates in the ring with Mike Tenay and Don West both putting him over huge as a future staple of the X-Division.
Segment 4:
Jim Cornette's office is seen again and he's called AJ into his locker room, he informs AJ of the kind words Foley had for AJ and says that it would possibly be controversial to give him the title match though since he's not been able to secure a win in his last few matches. He says he'll give AJ the title match at Turning Point if AJ can beat any opponents of The Main Event Mafia's choosing later tonight which AJ agrees to.
Segment 5:
We get a backstage segment with a big argument between Brodie Lee and Lance Rock/Jimmy Rave where the tag team taunt and get in the face of the newly signed TNA star Brodie Lee and are trying to provoke him with Brodie also in Lance's face and says he beat his tag partner Jimmy fair and square in the ring and he's willing to do the same to Lance if he wants to give it a shot with Lance agreeing to it.
Match 3:
Brodie Lee DEF. Lance Rock (w/ Jimmy Rave) at 8 Minutes
After the match, Jimmy Rave slides into the ring and attempts to attack Brodie Lee but Jimmy runs right into a Discus Lariat
Match 4:
TNA World Tag Team Champions Beer Money (James Storm and Robert Roode) DEF. Lethal Concequences after Storm pinned Lethal at 11 Minutes
After the match, TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier runs out to the ring to try and beat down Lethal Concequences with the help of Beer Money but Matt Morgan makes his way out to the ring and stops them as all 3 men leave the ring. Morgan gets on the mic. and says he knows Abyss isn't going to be able to keep waiting on having some fun before Turning Point so he announces tomorrow on a special Halloween episode of Xplosion, Abyss is going to face Sheik Abdul Bashier in a Monsters Ball match!
Segment 6:
We get a backstage interview with Eric Young by Jeremy Borash. Eric Young responds to the words of Daniels last week and says that he's trying his best to mature and become the wrestler that mama Young would want him to be and that he knows he can be. He says he's not going to run from his fears and lays out the challenge for The Fallen Angel Christopher Daniels at Turning Point. He goes to finish the promo but is ambushed from behind by Christopher Daniels
AJ Styles makes his entrance and is waiting to see who his opponents are that were handpicked by the Main Event Mafia and is just as shocked as the audience is to see its a reformation of the The New Age Outlaws now just going by "The Outlaws" Billy Gunn and Jesse James
Match 5:
AJ Styles DEF. The Outlaws (Billy Gunn and Jesse James) in a 2 on 1 Handicap match at 10 minutes after Styles was able to outsmart the two veterans and hit Jesse James with a Styles Clash
Styles celebrates the victory as we can see TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting watching on from a TV backstage
Main Event:
Scott Steiner fought Rhino to a no contest at 8 minutes after Rhino accidentally hit the referee with the Gore, Steiner would low blow Rhino, Christian Cage runs down to the ring to try and help Rhino but the rest of the Main Event Mafia look to hit the ring to attack Rhino and Steiner but AJ Styles, Mick Foley, Petey Williams, Kaz and The Motor City Machine Guns all hit the ring and make the save as the show comes to a close with The Main Event Mafia walking away and the babyfaces all standing in the ring taunting the Mafia to step up into the ring.
—-
Week 3 TNA Xplosion ”Halloween Special” October 31 2008
Match 1:
Doug Williams DEF. Gangrel in 6 Minutes
Match 2:
LAX (Homicide and Hernandez) DEF. Rellik and Black Reign in 8 Minutes after pinfall from Homicide on Black Reign
Match 3:
Abyss DEF. TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier in a "Monsters Ball Match" at 7 Minutes
WEEK 4 TNA IMPACT November 6 2008
Segment 1:
The show opens with The Main Event Mafia all being in the ring as they all cut a promo about how things went down at the end of Impact last week and say that is exactly why the "Family" was assembled was to restore a feeling of RESPECT in this business. Sting is standing in the corner, sunshades on, TNA World Title over his shoulder, not speaking just soaking everything in as the crowd boos. Kurt Angle says that the Main Event Mafia is going to do what Jeff Jarrett and Dixie Carter couldn't do and that's take this company to new heights and make TNA a household name. They say this is the REAL world where guys like them are leaders, and the guys like the rest of that locker room are just lucky to pick up the scraps. Scott Steiner trash talks his former ally Petey Williams and calls him a loser. Kevin Nash speaks on Christian Cage and says he's got something coming to him after interfering in Scott's main event last week, Booker T speaks specifically on AJ Styles and says that he couldn't get the job done for so many matches in a row but got lucky and beat a couple of washed up nobodies like The Outlaws last week and now all of a sudden he's the #1 contender for the TNA World Championship? BLASPHEMY!
They are cut off by TNA's GM Jim Cornette who says that he comes from all of their era and even then some for a few of them, so he understands a thing or two about respect. He says that this is HIS show to run, not theirs. He's going to make them walk the walk since they want to try and talk the talk. He says our opening contest will be Steiner vs Petey Williams, Kevin Nash wants Christian? Well he's finishing up a few details but Nash and Christian WILL be in the same ring together this Sunday at Turning Point on PPV, and that leaves us with a main event for tonight, Booker T is going to go one on one again with AJ Styles in a final proving grounds for AJ.
Match 1:
Scott Steiner DEF. Petey Williams in 5 Minutes
After the match, Scott picks up his former ally Petey and looks as if he's going to offer him a handshake but instead hits Petey with a clothesline which completely knocks him out and leaves the crowd booing.
Segment 2:
Backstage, we see the other 4 members of the Mafia sitting in their private lounge when the camera pans out to a tall man in a bouncer's uniform who is former ROH star Claudio Castagnoli standing in front of a red carpet roped off entrance, watching guard of their doorway as The Outlaws Billy Gunn and Jesse James approach, Claudio just stands there flexing his giant arms and not moving a muscle just looking straight ahead while Claudio asks what their business is. They say they need to speak to Kurt. Kurt Angle overhears this and says for Claudio to let them in, which Claudio unclicks the rope and lets them in. The Outlaws apologize about last week, Kurt cuts them off and says no excuses, they had one job which was to prevent AJ challenging for Sting's world championship. The Outlaws ask for another chance to try out for The Main Event Mafia, they comically look around the locker room and see how extravagant they have it and beg to be let into their secret club. Booker begins to yell at them while Nash just smokes a cigar in the background. Booker tells them he has to finish doing the job they had to do last week to beat some sense into AJ before his big match with Sting. Sting, frustrated, says enough of that and he can speak for himself and he plans to go out there and do so tonight. He wishes Booker good luck tonight and then leaves the private lounge as The Outlaws just watch the awkward tension unfold.
Match 2:
Brodie Lee DEF. Lance Rock (w/ Jimmy Rave) in 6 minutes
After the match, Jimmy Rave grabs a chair and slaps it into Lee's back and Lee drops down to his knees and Archer looks to be taunting Lee to stand back up so they can two on one beat down Lee but they're cut off by the other recent TNA signing Kenny Omega who runs into the ring and hits Rave with a V-Trigger and knocks him out, Rock makes his way out of the ring and pulls Rave out and helps him to the back as Omega helps Lee back up to his feet and the two shake hands while looking at Rock and Rave.
Match 3:
Christian Cage DEF. Doug Williams in 9 Minutes
After the match, Rhino comes down and joins Cage in the ring and the two cut a promo on what Cornette said earlier about having something planned for the PPV, Cage confirms a 6-Man Tag between Booker, Steiner, and Nash against himself, Rhino and a man who he promises the Mafia he's been more than assured wants to be here because of what TNA has to offer and would love to join in on the war that's boiling up in TNA.
Segment 3:
We get Don West and Mike Tenay running down the card for Turning Point this Sunday with two more matches to be announced:
The Rock and Rave Connection (Lance Rock and Jimmy Rave) vs. Brodie Lee and Kenny Omega
Tag Team Gauntlet for Future TNA World Tag Team Championship Match with featured teams: Team 3D, LAX, Motor City Machine Guns, The Outlaws, and MORE
Segment 4:
We get a video package hyping up the Eric Young and Christopher Daniels feud with new promos from both men, highlighted by Daniels saying he doesn't care about any silly war going on he's just back in TNA to climb up the ranks and become champion, and a silly immediate cut to Eric Young just wanting to have a good time and continue to getting paid doing what he loves.
Segment 5:
We get an in ring promo by Mick Foley who cuts a promo on his upcoming match with Kurt Angle this Sunday on PPV and thanks the TNA fans and the TNA locker room for welcoming him with welcome arms. He says that this match is a chance to prove to not just the world, but to himself that he still has it. He says that this goes beyond just fighting for his good friend Jeff Jarrett, this goes to knocking guys like Kurt Angle down a peg. He says that he understands exactly what the TNA locker room is going through watching this tall, buff, handsome men try and take their spot. The spot that they've bled, sweat and nearly died for. He says he's the poster child of that movement in wrestling. He says that his family is begging him not to step into that ring but he says that he's always going to be willing to die in this ring as long as it's for the greater good. He tells Kurt he better prepare for the fight of his life this Sunday.
Match 4:
TNA World Tag Team Champions Beer Money (James Storm and Robert Roode) and TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier DEF. Jay Lethal, Consequences Creed and Matt Morgan (w/ Abyss) after Roode pinned Lethal at 16 minutes
After the match, Beer Money make the escape after Abyss hits the ring, leaving Sheik Abdul Bashier behind to get hit by the Black Hole Slam by Abyss and then the 4 babyfaces celebrate in the ring
MAIN EVENT:
AJ Styles DEF. Booker T via pinfall at 17 Minutes
After the match, Booker is throwing a tantrum in the ring but TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting comes out and demands that Booker cuts it out. He says that AJ beat Booker fair and square and now AJ steps into the ring this Sunday with AJ's biggest match ever. Sting has had a few weeks to think everything over that's gone down since forming The Main Event Mafia and he truly believes that this will be for the better of professional wrestling, to enforce respect and to enforce a hierarchy. He hates this reputation that TNA has as this "retirement home" or a "side show" he says that he came to TNA because he saw the potential that it had but then you've got these empty headed pricks like Samoa Joe jumping onto concrete steps and nearly breaking his back, you've got guys like AJ who can't go more than two seconds without doing a flip, making a mockery of this great sport that he's been in long enough that every morning he wakes in pain for. The crowd boos as Sting continues to speak. Sting says that the fans may not understand it, and they may not like it, but Sting is here to save the future of professional wrestling into devolving to a circus act again. He pulls out of his suit pocket, several tubes of make up and dumps them on the ground, takes his sunglasses off, looks right into the camera with no makeup and just the pure face of Sting and says "Now, more than ever, IT'S SHOW TIME!"
The episode comes to a fade ending as Sting and AJ look each other on from a distance.
—-
Week 4 TNA Xplosion November 7 2008
Match 1:
Kaz DEF. Mike Bennett in 8 Minutes
Match 2:
Shark Boy DEF. Sonjay Dutt in 5 Minutes
Match 3:
Amazing Red DEF. Elix Skipper in 10 Minutes
—-
TNA TURNING POINT 2008 PREVIEW: November 9 2008:
TNA World Heavyweight Championship: Sting (c) vs. AJ Styles
Mick Foley vs. Kurt Angle
TNA World Tag Team Championships: Beer Money (c) vs. Abyss and Matt Morgan
TNA X-Division Championship: Sheik Abdul Bashier (c) vs. Jay Lethal vs. Consequences Creed
Eric Young vs. Christopher Daniels
The Main Event Mafia (Steiner, Booker and Nash) vs. Rhino, Christian Cage and ?
Brodie Lee and Kenny Omega vs. The Rock and Rave Infection
Tag Team Gauntlet (Team 3D vs. LAX vs. MCMG vs. The Outlaws vs. TBA)

You can find these more digestible to read with graphics for the PPV card here: https://bethebooker.net/thread/2357/tna-2008
Diary Start Date: October 16, 2008, The fall out from TNA Bound for Glory 2008
Note: This diary will not contain any knockouts or womens wrestling as to be perfectly honest I have never cared or connected with womens wrestling at all. I'm sorry if this upsets or offends anyone I just wanted to be honest.
TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting
TNA X-DivisioN Champion: Sheik Abdul Bashier
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money
Weekly Shows:
TNA Impact! - Thursdays on Spike TV
TNA Xplosion - Fridays on TNAWrestling.com and TNA's Youtube Channel
WEEK 1 TNA IMPACT October 16 2008
Segment 1:
Sting cuts a promo celebrating his newly won TNA World Heavyweight Championship from Samoa Joe at Bound For Glory. His promo is interrupted by AJ Styles who says that it's time for TNA to continue to evolve and move forward, he puts over the homegrown TNA talent and the guys who come up and are coming up from the indies. He says that another world title run with a guy like Sting is a step backwards and TNA needs to look forward with the future of this business. Styles says if Joe can't lead them, then it's time for himself to step up. He's cut off by Booker T who mocks AJ for implying he's anywhere near ready for a world championship match when Booker just beat AJ and Christian Cage in a Triple Threat at BFG. AJ and Booker argue back and forth before ultimately deciding for a one on one match in tonight's main event.
Match 1:
TNA World Tag Team Champions Beer Money (James Storm and Robert Roode) DEF. Eric Young and Shark Boy via pinfall from Roode onto Young at 8 minutes
After the match, Storm and Roode have already exited the ring and headed to the back, Shark Boy is reluctantly headed to the back selling his injuries, Eric Young is just playing into the crowds cheers while they applaud him for his effort while CHRISTOPHER DANIELS jumps the guard rail and slides into the ring and beats down Eric Young and hits Young with the BME as the crowd boos.
Segment 2:
Backstage interview with TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier who cuts a promo on his opponent he defeated at BFG Concequences Creed and Creed's tag team partner Jay Lethal who won the #1 contendership for the X Division title at BFG, issuing the challenge to Jay Lethal for next week
Match 2:
Rhino DEF. Sonjay Dutt via pinfall in a squash match at 4 minutes
Segment 3:
Backstage interview with Scott Steiner who calls Rhino an absolute slob and taunts him for taking 4 minutes to put away someone the likes of Sonjay Dutt
Segment 4:
A video vignette plays that hypes the debut of Brodie Lee who appears to be mysterious yet cocky and likable drifter character he cuts a promo putting all of TNA on notice for his arrival coming soon.
Match 3:
Matt Morgan (w/ Abyss) DEF. Hernandez (w/ Homicide) via pinfall at 8 minutes
After the match, Homicide hops in the ring trying to argue and beef with Morgan while Morgan just smiles and laughs at the much smaller but the brave Homicide, Team 3D come down the ramp with mics in hands and say that there's clearly some tension still there from their 4-Way Tag at BFG but they can't let them get distracted by the real enemies which are Beer Money. They initiate a challenge next week where all 3 teams can resolve their issues with each other while also seeing who is the best team of the 3 when they have a triple threat #1 contenders tag match next week on Impact.
Segment 5:
Christian Cage cuts an in ring promo and goes over what AJ Styles said earlier about guys coming and taking spots from the homefrown guys, he says he felt slightly offended by what AJ said as after everything he and AJ have been through, he still considers them friends. He says that he wants to make one thing clear and that is that no matter how it may look, Christian has never been just "given" a spot in any promotion and he has busted his ass off to become as good as he's become.
He's cut off by Kevin Nash who mocks Cage from the entrance ramp and says that Christian shouldn't worry about something so stupid, he mocks Christian for the way he views the business where Nash clearly just views it as a way to make as much money as possible. The two have a promo battle with Nash just dismissing Christian and shaking his head and walking away, claiming Christian isn't "worth it"
Match 4:
Concequences Creed (w/ Jay Lethal) DEF. Johnny Devine via pinfall at 8 minutes
Segment 5:
We get a run down from Don West and Mike Tenay hyping up next week's episode of TNA Impact with the following matches confirmed:
TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier (c) vs. Jay Lethal 3-Way Tag #1 Contenders Match: Team 3D vs. Matt Morgan and Abyss vs. LAX The Motor City Machine Guns vs. Kaz and Petey Williams
Segment 6:
Another video package for another debut coming soon to TNA Impact, this one showcases Kenny Omega, a young up and comer out of Canada with a bright future and an even brighter personality. Omega clearly shows a goofy side while clips of his matches from other promotions play that show although he's a fun loving guy, he's dangerous in the ring.
Main Event:
AJ Styles DEF. Booker T via DQ after interference at 16 minutes
Kurt Angle, Scott Steiner, Kevin Nash and shockingly, TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting surround the ring and swarm in as Steiner and Nash beat down Styles while Kurt Angle, furiously trash Styles while Sting stands there calm and collected with sunglasses on holding the TNA World Heavyweight Championship over his shoulder.
The show comes to a close with Angle, Steiner, Nash, Sting and Booker all posing and holding each other's arms up in the ring over a beaten down AJ Styles as the crowd boos.
—-
Week 1 TNA Xplosion October 17 2008
Match 1:
Doug Williams DEF. Volador Jr. at 9 minutes
Match 2:
Lance Rock (w/ Jimmy Rave) DEF. Sylvain Grenier at 5 Minutes
Match 3:
Kaz DEF. Kip James at 12 Minutes
—-
WEEK 2 TNA IMPACT October 23 2008
« REWRITING WRESTLING HISTORY (WITHOUT USING COMPUTER GAMES) TNA 2008+ Reply
« Prev12Next » Tony Soprano Avatar Tony Soprano Lower Midcarder
May 24, 2024 at 12:21am Asaemon likes this Quote TNA Logo
Diary Start Date: October 16, 2008, The fall out from TNA Bound for Glory 2008 Note: This diary will not contain any knockouts or womens wrestling as to be perfectly honest I have never cared or connected with womens wrestling at all. I'm sorry if this upsets or offends anyone I just wanted to be honest.
TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting
TNA X-DivisioN Champion: Sheik Abdul Bashier
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money
Weekly Shows:
TNA Impact! - Thursdays on Spike TV
TNA Xplosion - Fridays on TNAWrestling.com and TNA's Youtube Channel
(As of real time as of 05/27/2024) Upcoming PPV:
TNA Turning Point 2008: November 9 2008:
TNA World Heavyweight Championship: Sting (c) vs. AJ Styles
First Time Ever, Grudge Match: Kurt Angle vs. Mick Foley
TNA World Tag Team Championships: Beer Money (James Storm and Robert Roode) (c) vs. Abyss and Matt Morgan
TNA X-Division Championship: Sheik Abdul Bashier (c) vs. Jay Lethal vs. Concequences Creed
Eric Young vs Christopher Daniels
MORE TBA!
Tony Soprano Avatar Tony Soprano Lower Midcarder
May 24, 2024 at 12:24am Asaemon likes this Quote TNA Impact! October 16 2008
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Segment 1:
Sting cuts a promo celebrating his newly won TNA World Heavyweight Championship from Samoa Joe at Bound For Glory. His promo is interrupted by AJ Styles who says that it's time for TNA to continue to evolve and move forward, he puts over the homegrown TNA talent and the guys who come up and are coming up from the indies. He says that another world title run with a guy like Sting is a step backwards and TNA needs to look forward with the future of this business. Styles says if Joe can't lead them, then it's time for himself to step up. He's cut off by Booker T who mocks AJ for implying he's anywhere near ready for a world championship match when Booker just beat AJ and Christian Cage in a Triple Threat at BFG. AJ and Booker argue back and forth before ultimately deciding for a one on one match in tonight's main event.
Match 1:
TNA World Tag Team Champions Beer Money (James Storm and Robert Roode) DEF. Eric Young and Shark Boy via pinfall from Roode onto Young at 8 minutes
After the match, Storm and Roode have already exited the ring and headed to the back, Shark Boy is reluctantly headed to the back selling his injuries, Eric Young is just playing into the crowds cheers while they applaud him for his effort while CHRISTOPHER DANIELS jumps the guard rail and slides into the ring and beats down Eric Young and hits Young with the BME as the crowd boos.
Segment 2:
Backstage interview with TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier who cuts a promo on his opponent he defeated at BFG Concequences Creed and Creed's tag team partner Jay Lethal who won the #1 contendership for the X Division title at BFG, issuing the challenge to Jay Lethal for next week
Match 2:
Rhino DEF. Sonjay Dutt via pinfall in a squash match at 4 minutes
Segment 3:
Backstage interview with Scott Steiner who calls Rhino an absolute slob and taunts him for taking 4 minutes to put away someone the likes of Sonjay Dutt
Segment 4:
A video vignette plays that hypes the debut of Brodie Lee who appears to be mysterious yet cocky and likable drifter character he cuts a promo putting all of TNA on notice for his arrival coming soon.
Match 3:
Matt Morgan (w/ Abyss) DEF. Hernandez (w/ Homicide) via pinfall at 8 minutes
After the match, Homicide hops in the ring trying to argue and beef with Morgan while Morgan just smiles and laughs at the much smaller but the brave Homicide, Team 3D come down the ramp with mics in hands and say that there's clearly some tension still there from their 4-Way Tag at BFG but they can't let them get distracted by the real enemies which are Beer Money. They initiate a challenge next week where all 3 teams can resolve their issues with each other while also seeing who is the best team of the 3 when they have a triple threat #1 contenders tag match next week on Impact.
Segment 5:
Christian Cage cuts an in ring promo and goes over what AJ Styles said earlier about guys coming and taking spots from the homefrown guys, he says he felt slightly offended by what AJ said as after everything he and AJ have been through, he still considers them friends. He says that he wants to make one thing clear and that is that no matter how it may look, Christian has never been just "given" a spot in any promotion and he has busted his ass off to become as good as he's become.
He's cut off by Kevin Nash who mocks Cage from the entrance ramp and says that Christian shouldn't worry about something so stupid, he mocks Christian for the way he views the business where Nash clearly just views it as a way to make as much money as possible. The two have a promo battle with Nash just dismissing Christian and shaking his head and walking away, claiming Christian isn't "worth it"
Match 4:
Concequences Creed (w/ Jay Lethal) DEF. Johnny Devine via pinfall at 8 minutes
Segment 5:
We get a run down from Don West and Mike Tenay hyping up next week's episode of TNA Impact with the following matches confirmed:
TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier (c) vs. Jay Lethal 3-Way Tag #1 Contenders Match: Team 3D vs. Matt Morgan and Abyss vs. LAX The Motor City Machine Guns vs. Kaz and Petey Williams
Segment 6:
Another video package for another debut coming soon to TNA Impact, this one showcases Kenny Omega, a young up and comer out of Canada with a bright future and an even brighter personality. Omega clearly shows a goofy side while clips of his matches from other promotions play that show although he's a fun loving guy, he's dangerous in the ring.
Main Event:
AJ Styles DEF. Booker T via DQ after interference at 16 minutes
Kurt Angle, Scott Steiner, Kevin Nash and shockingly, TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting surround the ring and swarm in as Steiner and Nash beat down Styles while Kurt Angle, furiously trash Styles while Sting stands there calm and collected with sunglasses on holding the TNA World Heavyweight Championship over his shoulder.
The show comes to a close with Angle, Steiner, Nash, Sting and Booker all posing and holding each other's arms up in the ring over a beaten down AJ Styles as the crowd boos.
Tony Soprano Avatar Tony Soprano Lower Midcarder
May 24, 2024 at 12:33am Asaemon likes this Quote
TNA Xplosion October 17 2008 TNA Xplosion (February 19, 2014) – Atomic Drop Match 1:
Doug Williams DEF. Volador Jr. at 9 minutes
Match 2:
Lance Rock (w/ Jimmy Rave) DEF. Sylvain Grenier at 5 Minutes
Match 3:
Kaz DEF. Kip James at 12 Minutes Tony Soprano Avatar Tony Soprano Lower Midcarder
May 24, 2024 at 10:55pm Asaemon likes this Quote TNA Impact! October 23 2008
Download Posted Image - Tna Impact Wrestling Logo PNG Image with No Background - PNGkey.com
Match 1:
The Motor City Machine Guns (Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin) fought Kaz and Petey Williams to a contest due to interference at 5 minutes
The 4 X-Division stars are beat down by the same group who ended Impact last week Kurt Angle, Scott Steiner, Kevin Nash, Booker T and TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting
Segment 1:
The group cut a promo primarily lead by Kurt Angle and Sting. They introduce their faction as "The Main Event Mafia" and say that they're there to set the record straight in TNA - There is no "future" of TNA without first going through them. They make it adamantly clear that this is all for and all about respect which they feel these "young punks" are not giving in TNA. They say that the TNA originals and new talent that come into TNA should be kissing them at their feet and grateful for everything that they've done for this company. This shocks the crowd especially to see someone like Sting join the likes of this group who goes on to tear down Samoa Joe at BFG several weeks ago. Kevin Nash mentions that there are "some" guys that don't value their own stock the way they should and have gone soft and it gives the main event talent a bad look (obviously referring to Christian Cage's promo last week) - while Scott Steiner then says there are other non TNA originals like Rhino who are not main event level talent and aren't even "has been" levels but are "never was" level talent - Booker T begins to speak his mind in the promo but the group is cut off by AJ Styles.
AJ Styles tries to tear down the group from a distance and is angry they attacked him and beat him down last week and taunts Booker for not being able to get the job done last week on his own, he challenges Booker to a rematch tonight but Booker doesn't agree to it before Christian Cage comes out and joins AJ on his promo and calls out Nash for his comments about him - Christian Cage demands that if Booker is too cowardly for a singles match then maybe tonight's main event should be a tag team match between Christian Cage and AJ Styles against Kevin Nash and Booker T with the match being set.
Match 2:
Brodie Lee DEF. Jimmy Rave (w/ Lance Rock) at 6 minutes in Brodie's debut match
Brodie made a great first showing and was able to showcase his fast paced but heavy hitting fighting style, after the match, Lance Rock steps into the ring and squares up with Brodie before ultimately checking on Rave and picking him up and helping him up to the back.
Segment 2:
We get an in ring promo from Christopher Daniels who recently returned to the company last week and says he's spent nearly a year away forced to be out of TNA while guys like Eric Young and his boyish personality make a mockery of this sport that he loves so much. Daniels puts the entire locker room on notice and says that he's better, faster, and stronger than ever before and he'll stop at nothing to reach the top of the mountain this time in TNA.
Match 3:
Christopher Daniels DEF. Shark Boy at 7 minutes
After the match, Daniels goes to beat down Shark Boy but Eric Young comes running from the back to try and defend his friend Shark Boy but is reversed by Daniels and is once again left laid out by Christopher Daniels
Match 4:
Matt Morgan and Abyss DEF. Team 3D (Brother Ray and Brother Devon) and LAX (Hernandez and Homicide) in a #1 Contenders 3-Way Tag at 13 Minutes after Matt Morgan pins Homicide
As Morgan and Abyss celebrate in the ring, Beer Money's music hits and the TNA World Tag Team Champions look to make their ring to confront their next challengers but stop dead in their tracks as both LAX and Team 3D stand tall next to Morgan and Abyss and all 6 men just stand there just waiting for the chance to attack Beer Money as Beer Money just scoff and head to the back instead.
Segment 3:
Mick Foley has an in ring promo and verbally attacks the Main Event Mafia and says it's an ignorant and foolish concept for a group, he spends time putting over the TNA homegrown talent but is cut off by Main Event Mafia's Kurt Angle who hits the ring and gets in Foley's face and says that it's because of him that he lost to Jeff Jarrett at Bound For Glory and made him realize how much of a joke this company actually is so if anyone is to blame for the MEM as a group it's Foley, Foley looks to try and defend himself but Angle headbutts Foley instead and knocks Foley out onto his back as Jeff Jarrett's music hits before Angle can cause any more damage but Jarrett comes running into a belly to belly suplex by Kurt Angle who then relentlessly beats down Jarrett to the point TNA security comes to escort and drag Angle away as Jarrett is helped by medical staff and a slightly bloodied forehead Foley is struggling to wobble to the back.
Match 5:
TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier (c) DEF. Jay Lethal (w/ Concequences Creed) at 11 Minutes via lowblow after the ref argues with Creed after Creed tries to stop Sheik from cheating beforehand.
After the match, Creed hits the ring to try and get to Sheik but Sheik makes a run for it up the ramp with the X-Division Championship but is cut off by Jim Cornette at the entrance ramp who tears down Sheik's tactics have now cost 2 X-Division contenders a match and therefore, at the Turning Point PPV Sheik will now have to defend his championship against both Creed and Lethal in a 3-Way while Lethal and Creed smile with Sheik throwing a tantrum.
Segment 4:
We get a backstage interview with TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting being interviewed by Jeremy Borash with Sting doubling down on his new stance as a heel and says he truly believes the Main Event Mafia is a step in the right direction for not just TNA, but for this business as well. When Borash says if that's the case why did Kurt Angle just earlier tonight get dragged out of the ring like a wild animal after beating down two legends in their own right like Jeff Jarrett and Mick Foley. Sting says that both men ultimately had it coming and that they just need to trust the process, he's come to terms that Kurt knows what he's doing and will stick by his side.
MAIN EVENT:
The Main Event Mafia (Booker T and Kevin Nash) DEF. AJ Styles and Christian Cage at 12 Minutes after Scott Steiner attempted to come to the aid of Booker and Nash, Rhino attacked Steiner from behind and Christian was looking to the outside and was distracted and then turned around to get hit with a big boot and then hit with a jack knife power bomb from Kevin Nash
The show comes to a close with Nash, Booker and Steiner all posing in the ring doing a Main Event Mafia hand sign
Week 2 TNA Xplosion October 24 2008
Match 1: Amazing Red DEF. Lince Dorado at 8 Minutes
Match 2: TNA World Tag Team Champion Robert Roode (w/ James Storm) DEF. Gran Akuma at 4 Minutes
Match 3: The Motor City Machine Guns (Chris Sabin and Alex Shelley) DEF. Kaz and Petey Williams at 14 Minutes after Sabin pinned Williams
After the match, all four men shook hands in the ring.
WEEK 3 TNA IMPACT October 30 2008
Segment 1:
The opening segment is an in ring promo where Kurt Angle calls out Jeff Jarrett and says he's not finished with him yet. He says if it wasn't for TNA security he would have done a whole lot worse last week and he wants his rematch from Bound For Glory. He's cut off by Mick Foley who comes down to the entrance ramp and says that Kurt is too ignorant to realize that he doesn't truly want a rematch with Jarrett, because if that was the case he wouldn't have beaten Jarrett down so badly last week to the point he can't be medically cleared. He tears down the rest of the Mafia as well and says this whole "respect" shtick is tired and played out and they all lived through an era where a big stable of a**holes ruined and killed "another company" and Foley won't allow that to happen to TNA. He says that Angle won't get his rematch with Jarrett, but Angle will be getting a match with Foley at Turning Point!
The rest of the Main Event Mafia come out from behind and are slowly approaching and look to beat down Foley but from behind the rest of the Mafia comes down The Motor City Machine Guns, Kaz and Petey Williams! The four men who had their tag match stopped last week due to interference from the Mafia - it looks like there's about to be a massive brawl but TNA GM Jim Cornette appears on screen and calls the brawl off and announces an 8-Man Tag between Kaz/Williams/MCMG vs. The Main Event Mafia and that's gonna start ... right now!
Match 1:
The Main Event Mafia (Kurt Angle, Booker T, Kevin Nash and TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting) (w/ Scott Steiner) DEF. The Motor City Machine Guns, Petey Williams and Kaz in an 8-Man Tag via pinfall from Angle onto Williams at 9 minutes after Steiner distracted his former ally Petey Williams by taunting him from the outside.
After the match, The Main Event Mafia celebrate in the ring together as the crowd boos.
Segment 2:
There's a promo battle between TNA World Tag Team Champions Beer Money and Abyss/Matt Morgan who make their match at Turning Point next Sunday official with Beer Money trying to provoke Abyss into assaulting them outside of the match so they can report Abyss to the authorities and get him thrown back into the asylum that he was at earlier this year. Abyss is shaking in the corner and shaking his head and slightly squealing saying he won't go back. Morgan helps calm his partner down before turning to Beer Money and saying that it's true that outside of wrestling in matches, Abyss does need to keep his bet behavior. But thankfully, that rule doesn't apply to him before then kicking James Storm straight in the face with a big boot and then going for Roode who dodges and then rolls out of the ring and pulls Storm out of the ring quick while they need to try and preserve themselves for their match later tonight with Consequences Creed.
Segment 3:
Jim Cornette is backstage in his office and thanks Mick for offering to deal with Angle on a personal level. He says Mick Foley making his in ring debut for TNA against Kurt Angle in a first time ever dream match will be huge for the PPV but now he just needs to pen out the main event. Foley puts over AJ Styles huge and says he truly believes AJ is the best wrestler in the world and is everything that TNA stands for. Jim Cornette tells Foley he likes what he's thinking and that would be 2 big first time ever matches for the PPV. He tells Foley he's going to think it over.
Match 2:
Kenny Omega DEF. Kiyoshi in 5 minutes
This was Omega's first match as a signed TNA wrestler and he made a great showing as he celebrates in the ring with Mike Tenay and Don West both putting him over huge as a future staple of the X-Division.
Segment 4:
Jim Cornette's office is seen again and he's called AJ into his locker room, he informs AJ of the kind words Foley had for AJ and says that it would possibly be controversial to give him the title match though since he's not been able to secure a win in his last few matches. He says he'll give AJ the title match at Turning Point if AJ can beat any opponents of The Main Event Mafia's choosing later tonight which AJ agrees to.
Segment 5:
We get a backstage segment with a big argument between Brodie Lee and Lance Rock/Jimmy Rave where the tag team taunt and get in the face of the newly signed TNA star Brodie Lee and are trying to provoke him with Brodie also in Lance's face and says he beat his tag partner Jimmy fair and square in the ring and he's willing to do the same to Lance if he wants to give it a shot with Lance agreeing to it.
Match 3:
Brodie Lee DEF. Lance Rock (w/ Jimmy Rave) at 8 Minutes
After the match, Jimmy Rave slides into the ring and attempts to attack Brodie Lee but Jimmy runs right into a Discus Lariat
Match 4:
TNA World Tag Team Champions Beer Money (James Storm and Robert Roode) DEF. Lethal Concequences after Storm pinned Lethal at 11 Minutes
After the match, TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier runs out to the ring to try and beat down Lethal Concequences with the help of Beer Money but Matt Morgan makes his way out to the ring and stops them as all 3 men leave the ring. Morgan gets on the mic. and says he knows Abyss isn't going to be able to keep waiting on having some fun before Turning Point so he announces tomorrow on a special Halloween episode of Xplosion, Abyss is going to face Sheik Abdul Bashier in a Monsters Ball match!
Segment 6:
We get a backstage interview with Eric Young by Jeremy Borash. Eric Young responds to the words of Daniels last week and says that he's trying his best to mature and become the wrestler that mama Young would want him to be and that he knows he can be. He says he's not going to run from his fears and lays out the challenge for The Fallen Angel Christopher Daniels at Turning Point. He goes to finish the promo but is ambushed from behind by Christopher Daniels
AJ Styles makes his entrance and is waiting to see who his opponents are that were handpicked by the Main Event Mafia and is just as shocked as the audience is to see its a reformation of the The New Age Outlaws now just going by "The Outlaws" Billy Gunn and Jesse James
Match 5:
AJ Styles DEF. The Outlaws (Billy Gunn and Jesse James) in a 2 on 1 Handicap match at 10 minutes after Styles was able to outsmart the two veterans and hit Jesse James with a Styles Clash
Styles celebrates the victory as we can see TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting watching on from a TV backstage
Main Event:
Scott Steiner fought Rhino to a no contest at 8 minutes after Rhino accidentally hit the referee with the Gore, Steiner would low blow Rhino, Christian Cage runs down to the ring to try and help Rhino but the rest of the Main Event Mafia look to hit the ring to attack Rhino and Steiner but AJ Styles, Mick Foley, Petey Williams, Kaz and The Motor City Machine Guns all hit the ring and make the save as the show comes to a close with The Main Event Mafia walking away and the babyfaces all standing in the ring taunting the Mafia to step up into the ring.
—-
Week 3 TNA Xplosion ”Halloween Special” October 31 2008
Match 1:
Doug Williams DEF. Gangrel in 6 Minutes
Match 2:
LAX (Homicide and Hernandez) DEF. Rellik and Black Reign in 8 Minutes after pinfall from Homicide on Black Reign
Match 3:
Abyss DEF. TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier in a "Monsters Ball Match" at 7 Minutes
WEEK 4 TNA IMPACT November 6 2008
Segment 1:
The show opens with The Main Event Mafia all being in the ring as they all cut a promo about how things went down at the end of Impact last week and say that is exactly why the "Family" was assembled was to restore a feeling of RESPECT in this business. Sting is standing in the corner, sunshades on, TNA World Title over his shoulder, not speaking just soaking everything in as the crowd boos. Kurt Angle says that the Main Event Mafia is going to do what Jeff Jarrett and Dixie Carter couldn't do and that's take this company to new heights and make TNA a household name. They say this is the REAL world where guys like them are leaders, and the guys like the rest of that locker room are just lucky to pick up the scraps. Scott Steiner trash talks his former ally Petey Williams and calls him a loser. Kevin Nash speaks on Christian Cage and says he's got something coming to him after interfering in Scott's main event last week, Booker T speaks specifically on AJ Styles and says that he couldn't get the job done for so many matches in a row but got lucky and beat a couple of washed up nobodies like The Outlaws last week and now all of a sudden he's the #1 contender for the TNA World Championship? BLASPHEMY!
They are cut off by TNA's GM Jim Cornette who says that he comes from all of their era and even then some for a few of them, so he understands a thing or two about respect. He says that this is HIS show to run, not theirs. He's going to make them walk the walk since they want to try and talk the talk. He says our opening contest will be Steiner vs Petey Williams, Kevin Nash wants Christian? Well he's finishing up a few details but Nash and Christian WILL be in the same ring together this Sunday at Turning Point on PPV, and that leaves us with a main event for tonight, Booker T is going to go one on one again with AJ Styles in a final proving grounds for AJ.
Match 1:
Scott Steiner DEF. Petey Williams in 5 Minutes
After the match, Scott picks up his former ally Petey and looks as if he's going to offer him a handshake but instead hits Petey with a clothesline which completely knocks him out and leaves the crowd booing.
Segment 2:
Backstage, we see the other 4 members of the Mafia sitting in their private lounge when the camera pans out to a tall man in a bouncer's uniform who is former ROH star Claudio Castagnoli standing in front of a red carpet roped off entrance, watching guard of their doorway as The Outlaws Billy Gunn and Jesse James approach, Claudio just stands there flexing his giant arms and not moving a muscle just looking straight ahead while Claudio asks what their business is. They say they need to speak to Kurt. Kurt Angle overhears this and says for Claudio to let them in, which Claudio unclicks the rope and lets them in. The Outlaws apologize about last week, Kurt cuts them off and says no excuses, they had one job which was to prevent AJ challenging for Sting's world championship. The Outlaws ask for another chance to try out for The Main Event Mafia, they comically look around the locker room and see how extravagant they have it and beg to be let into their secret club. Booker begins to yell at them while Nash just smokes a cigar in the background. Booker tells them he has to finish doing the job they had to do last week to beat some sense into AJ before his big match with Sting. Sting, frustrated, says enough of that and he can speak for himself and he plans to go out there and do so tonight. He wishes Booker good luck tonight and then leaves the private lounge as The Outlaws just watch the awkward tension unfold.
Match 2:
Brodie Lee DEF. Lance Rock (w/ Jimmy Rave) in 6 minutes
After the match, Jimmy Rave grabs a chair and slaps it into Lee's back and Lee drops down to his knees and Archer looks to be taunting Lee to stand back up so they can two on one beat down Lee but they're cut off by the other recent TNA signing Kenny Omega who runs into the ring and hits Rave with a V-Trigger and knocks him out, Rock makes his way out of the ring and pulls Rave out and helps him to the back as Omega helps Lee back up to his feet and the two shake hands while looking at Rock and Rave.
Match 3:
Christian Cage DEF. Doug Williams in 9 Minutes
After the match, Rhino comes down and joins Cage in the ring and the two cut a promo on what Cornette said earlier about having something planned for the PPV, Cage confirms a 6-Man Tag between Booker, Steiner, and Nash against himself, Rhino and a man who he promises the Mafia he's been more than assured wants to be here because of what TNA has to offer and would love to join in on the war that's boiling up in TNA.
Segment 3:
We get Don West and Mike Tenay running down the card for Turning Point this Sunday with two more matches to be announced:
The Rock and Rave Connection (Lance Rock and Jimmy Rave) vs. Brodie Lee and Kenny Omega
Tag Team Gauntlet for Future TNA World Tag Team Championship Match with featured teams: Team 3D, LAX, Motor City Machine Guns, The Outlaws, and MORE
Segment 4:
We get a video package hyping up the Eric Young and Christopher Daniels feud with new promos from both men, highlighted by Daniels saying he doesn't care about any silly war going on he's just back in TNA to climb up the ranks and become champion, and a silly immediate cut to Eric Young just wanting to have a good time and continue to getting paid doing what he loves.
Segment 5:
We get an in ring promo by Mick Foley who cuts a promo on his upcoming match with Kurt Angle this Sunday on PPV and thanks the TNA fans and the TNA locker room for welcoming him with welcome arms. He says that this match is a chance to prove to not just the world, but to himself that he still has it. He says that this goes beyond just fighting for his good friend Jeff Jarrett, this goes to knocking guys like Kurt Angle down a peg. He says that he understands exactly what the TNA locker room is going through watching this tall, buff, handsome men try and take their spot. The spot that they've bled, sweat and nearly died for. He says he's the poster child of that movement in wrestling. He says that his family is begging him not to step into that ring but he says that he's always going to be willing to die in this ring as long as it's for the greater good. He tells Kurt he better prepare for the fight of his life this Sunday.
Match 4:
TNA World Tag Team Champions Beer Money (James Storm and Robert Roode) and TNA X-Division Champion Sheik Abdul Bashier DEF. Jay Lethal, Consequences Creed and Matt Morgan (w/ Abyss) after Roode pinned Lethal at 16 minutes
After the match, Beer Money make the escape after Abyss hits the ring, leaving Sheik Abdul Bashier behind to get hit by the Black Hole Slam by Abyss and then the 4 babyfaces celebrate in the ring
MAIN EVENT:
AJ Styles DEF. Booker T via pinfall at 17 Minutes
After the match, Booker is throwing a tantrum in the ring but TNA World Heavyweight Champion Sting comes out and demands that Booker cuts it out. He says that AJ beat Booker fair and square and now AJ steps into the ring this Sunday with AJ's biggest match ever. Sting has had a few weeks to think everything over that's gone down since forming The Main Event Mafia and he truly believes that this will be for the better of professional wrestling, to enforce respect and to enforce a hierarchy. He hates this reputation that TNA has as this "retirement home" or a "side show" he says that he came to TNA because he saw the potential that it had but then you've got these empty headed pricks like Samoa Joe jumping onto concrete steps and nearly breaking his back, you've got guys like AJ who can't go more than two seconds without doing a flip, making a mockery of this great sport that he's been in long enough that every morning he wakes in pain for. The crowd boos as Sting continues to speak. Sting says that the fans may not understand it, and they may not like it, but Sting is here to save the future of professional wrestling into devolving to a circus act again. He pulls out of his suit pocket, several tubes of make up and dumps them on the ground, takes his sunglasses off, looks right into the camera with no makeup and just the pure face of Sting and says "Now, more than ever, IT'S SHOW TIME!"
The episode comes to a fade ending as Sting and AJ look each other on from a distance.
—-
Week 4 TNA Xplosion November 7 2008
Match 1:
Kaz DEF. Mike Bennett in 8 Minutes
Match 2:
Shark Boy DEF. Sonjay Dutt in 5 Minutes
Match 3:
Amazing Red DEF. Elix Skipper in 10 Minutes
—-
TNA TURNING POINT 2008 PREVIEW: November 9 2008:
TNA World Heavyweight Championship: Sting (c) vs. AJ Styles
Mick Foley vs. Kurt Angle
TNA World Tag Team Championships: Beer Money (c) vs. Abyss and Matt Morgan
TNA X-Division Championship: Sheik Abdul Bashier (c) vs. Jay Lethal vs. Consequences Creed
Eric Young vs. Christopher Daniels
The Main Event Mafia (Steiner, Booker and Nash) vs. Rhino, Christian Cage and ?
Brodie Lee and Kenny Omega vs. The Rock and Rave Infection
Tag Team Gauntlet (Team 3D vs. LAX vs. MCMG vs. The Outlaws vs. TBA)

Mini rant but my mom is such a fucking pain in the ass. She Deson't understand that mixing Vaseline with my medicine won't dont shit, but only waste it. (I literally got that refill like a week ago), on top of that I can't stand oily textures on my skin but god forbid I tell her that she's gonna start fucking complaining and arguing. I have hyperpigmentation due to past flare ups which I don't really mind at all and it desont bother me, but to her she claims I think it's "cute" , SINCE WHEN I DID I FUCKING SAY THAT?? i genuinely can't stand her, atp she literally might be a stress trigger (which in turn triggers flare ups)
I had to get this off my chest I just fucking can't with her.

Hello, M24, 6’5”, 350LBS. Early May had chest pain like a respiratory infection. Took ibuprofen 1200 MG every other ish day for about a week to week and half. Started to experience chest pain, arm pain, ears ringing, and vertigo like symptoms. Did not have really any stomach pain besides discomfort and diarrhea. I went to Urgent care for the chest pain and arm pain did EKG and blood pressure, stuff like that and everything was normal besides a little higher blood pressure, but that runs in family. After I stopped taking it everything has kinda went back to normal. Chest pain, arm pain, stomach issues have gone away, but the “vertigo” and ear ringing has not completely gone away comes and goes. Still feel more tired than usual and slight lightheadedness. Went on a canoeing on Sunday, arms super sore and sunburnt. Took two 325 aspirin to help with the soreness when I got home Sunday. Monday, got home from work had an intense headache on the back left side of head took one 325 aspirin, that did nothing. Wake up today and “vertigo” is back to the point where it’s hard to focus on work. Looking for advise, if I need to go to ER, talk with primary care, or if there is at home mitigation I can take. Trying to avoid ER because do not have money for it. Thank you for the help

Hi Guys, I've been a regular here for 7 months now trying to sort out my gastritis. Some of the posts here have MASSIVELY helped me get out of some dark places so i thought I'd make one myself. Here's my story so far:
September 2023: I was smoking, living off 3 strong black coffees 1st thing in the morning, eating tonnes of greasy rich food, and due to stress from an ill relative i was finishing off a bottle of wine plus beers every night. One day, my stomach had enough and i experienced bloating, a fizzy feeling in my stomach and the worst heartburn I've ever had. I was diagnosed with alchoholic gastritis, given Lanzoprezole and told not to drink.
October: Having had 3 weeks of PPIs i stopped them after finding the anxiety side effects too much to handle. As soon as i stopped them i realised my stomach was ok. (Or so i thought) For about 2 - 3 weeks i got away with going back to my usual lifestyle, still drinking but only occasionally, before it all came to a head and the symptoms were so much worse. All of the above, this time with dizzyness, chest pains, heart palpitations and a horrible sense of doom and nasty nausea.
November - Feburary 2024: I spent most of this time taking various ppis for a short time, with famotidine on and off hoping for the same thing to happen again. It did not. Everytime i came off the meds i was met with the same symptoms until i managed to go about a month without drinking (at this point i'd cut back to very occasional drinking) and staying on famotidine. I knew this wasn't going to get any better until i changed my lifestyle habbits, but was trying to have my cake and eat it buy just 'cutting down'.
March 2024: After a weekend away and heavy drinking, my gastritis was the worst it's ever been. Off medication i felt absolutely horrendous, bedridden, severely depressed and decided i had to sort this out once and for all. I knew deep down all along that lifestyle changes had to be made but was probably in denial up until this point, not knowing how bad it could get.
April: No more booze, not even a one off pint. I quit coffee cold turkey. I cut out all irritatants, milk, cheese, all herbs and spices, fatty, acidic, spicy, rich, junk foods... all out the window. Most meals consist of veg soup, ham, plain poached or scrambled eggs, homade bread, lean meats with roasted veg, bananas, nuts and bland crackers to snack on. I only drink water or chamomile tea. I did not smoke, i switched to vaping and cut my nicotine down to the lowest possible dose that caused the least issues. I do PPIs and stick to this diet for most of April and start to feel a lot better.
May: At the start of May my endoscopy refferal came in and i was told to stop the PPIs before hand, having had enough of the side effects i stopped them anyway and stayed on the diet with gaviscon to deal with symptoms. I also took something called Silicol Gel to coat my stomach after a freind recommended it. I noticed i was able to manage ok like this. I had a few hiccups (a pizza, some occasional junk food) but didn't take more than a day or two to feel ok again and even then i just felt a bit 'off'. Halfway through May i added probiotics to the mix. This is when i noticed feeling A LOT better and was able to eat somewhat normally without reacting badly (I'm wondering if my gut bacteria was out of whack from months of PPIs too?!)
Now: Had my endoscopy today and explained everything to my gastro. After having the camera down there, he found everything absolutely normal. No inflammation, no damage and no need for biopsys. I was told to stick to the diet a little longer and there was no need to go back on medication! I AM THRILLED. I've just eaten a creamy garlic pasta and had a cup of fully caffeined tea to treat myself and FEEL ABSOLUTELY FINE 😭
All upper gi symptoms have now gone. No more chest pain, dizzyness, bloating, dry mouth, heart palpitations, gagging sensation, abdominal pain all GONE.
Am i 100% healed? Not quite. There's still an occasional fizzy feeling lower down (my gastro isn't concerned after looking in my upper GI tract) and heartburn after too much bread/cheese. This is also getting better each day and it's absolutely nothing compared to the hell of two months ago and i feel 90% there. I able to eat normally, bread, cheese, tomatoes, fried foods, caffine without any issues and no medication needed other than the occasional gaviscon. My plan is another month (maybe two) of clean diet, no booze or caffine, probiotics, quit nicotine all together and regular daily excercise. I'm pretty hopeful ill be out of the woods at this rate. I have no plans to go back to drinking as it's probably responsible for all this. I also feel much more energetic without caffine!
What helped me -Cutting out the problem habbits, booze, junk food, caffine, fizzy drinks, smoking etc. I know how hard it is to accept and to carry out, but it's worth it. -NOT constantly googling my symptoms and convincing myself that I'm seriously ill. -Probiotics, specifically Aflrorex (this was the biggest turning point imo, for mental and physical symptoms) -Silicogel when coming off PPIs definitely helped sooth my stomach. -For any nicotine addicts, vaping causes me a lot less problems than smoking did. When I went from 20mg salt to 6mg freebase nicotine it causes next to no symptoms. If you can't bring yourself to quit right now (like me) at least try to cut down and it will help you recover.
TLDR: I'm an idiot and thought i could just take meds to make this better. But put the work in AND IT DOES GET BETTER 😎😎😎

I (23yo Female, approx 130 lbs 5’7) have been having trouble sleeping lately and so I’ve been taking ZzQuil on occasion to help. I usually do only 15mL just to help a little bit. Two night ago I took some and was surprised to see it didn’t make me tired this time. I then became nauseous, and woke up several times in the night dry heaving. When I woke up I still felt sick and had mild chest pain. I assumed it was my GERD because I had a few drinks with a friend earlier in the evening, and laid on my back to watch a movie after drinking.
Last night I had took a full 30mL of the Zzquil. Made me less tired, and the few times I did fall asleep last night I woke up within an hour in a lot of pain - both nausea and chest pain. I threw up this morning and I’m still feeling a lot of pain and had to take off work. It’s like a pressure on my chest, or almost as if it’s submerged in water, but in a painful way? Shortness of breath too. I’ll obviously stop taking the Zzquil - but would it be wise to see a clinic about the symptoms? I’m hoping I didn’t do something god-awful to my body by taking ZzQuil so often. To be fair, I also have an anxiety disorder so I also don’t want to just be enabling it by making this out to be worse than it actually is. But I definitely felt like I was going to pass out earlier today. Sort of comes in “waves” too; it’s always present, but every few minutes it becomes really intense.

It felt frustrating in Chongqing. I was rather stuck in Hechuan. I got accustomed to lajiao (spice) there. I was a Midwesterner at the age of 22. I was raised in Illinois. I became a manic—a Ferris wheel on fire—I was hiding under a bed in a hotel. Bold like napalm. Sometimes I can never stop. Even when I was 18 in a ward arguing with staff. Always want to fight things. That’s why I refused the meds and went on a plane from America to China. I was going to be an English teacher. And like a light switch, the change and SSRIs turned me into a mess. It would be my first time experiencing psychosis. My biggest issue. I never imagined I would be stuck illegally in a country suffering a psychotic episode in my early twenties.
Transplanted as pollen. I was left with a backpack and a cellphone. With a downloaded app called WeChat. I had arrogantly quit a university job in a fit. Spent the past months full of energy and not sleeping and neglecting myself, including not eating, to work on a novel. Not considering myself normally religious, I had obsessed over occult ideas during that time. Spending nights reading Aleister Crowley—haven taken a rusty pocket knife to carve a pentagram on my chest for spiritual protection.
I did not have funds to fly home. My visa was connected to my previous job, which meant I had now made it void. I was an illegal resident now in China.
I used a nifty app called WeChat as a messaging app, it allows users to find people near them that are also looking for others. It was like a virtual pond. All kinds of people, including sex workers trying to make things happen.
It could with luck be used to find people looking for people in terms of other kinds of work. It was helpful on many occasions for finding gigs working at English training schools and also finding work as a private tutor for people.
WeChat also works as a digital wallet.
Mania makes me irritable. Enough to tell a boss to fuck off. Thoughts ricochet within me. Bumper cars collide.
Being stuck and angry sucks. I scrolled and scrolled on a Huawei phone.
Absolutely pissed off at this world.
Pissed at the times police wanted to take me away for being a mess.
Sometimes women get pissed. Scrolling through their phones. Angry at their cheating husbands. It really is not that hard to have flair—be a damn white oddity. Like moths to a porchlight. Particles of sand through hands. This is when I first started the habit of it…
I rather go by a rather empty name of Taishen… with further explanation needed but now is not convenient. But I assure it is interesting enough and has some importance.
Habits are various in nature in how they attach to and eat at marrow—like atom bombs flashing as rays evaporating DNA—sets in a way less than human as putting myself in the cage of bad things taken up—my time as a former heroin addict is left as stretch marks on me in various ways. The same goes for the first time I found myself making arrangements with middle aged married women while desperation of waves whiplashed me like sandpaper hands coming at me to leave me in a tiring state of abrasion.
I had spent a night snuck away into a hotel. Found someone on a business trip. Instead of registering I waited to sneak along into the hotel elevator amongst a group of others attending the hotel, as I had no card. I headed to a designated room number. Originally I was sitting in a park. Playing on WeChat and found someone in their mid-thirties. Pictures were exchanged and I said no. She brought up paying for the hotel if I arrived. I agreed and went along.
When I met I washed up after her and we used our phones to awkwardly translate what we would do.
Room service knocked. I found myself hidden under a bed as I was not registered to be there.
It seems unusual that it was around this time I had started working on a story of my life as a heroin addict when I got caught up in my worse manic episode ever experienced during my age of 22. Finished half that story before never going back to it after my manic episode had ended. Now I am here writing about it and wondering if the same can happen again in the process of this work.
It feels extremely cliché I would write a novel about struggles with heroin addiction. It has been done many times. It’s just lame of me.
I feel like my thoughts are bit off. I left the hotel the next morning with the little money I did have on a debit card. Turns out the woman was from Taiyuan. It is a city in the northern part of China in the province of Shanxi—coal country with the worst air pollution in China. She has a colleague in Taiyuan that takes courses at an English training center. I was able to contact this place in the morning via a shared contact on WeChat given to me by the stranger I met that night.
Before I knew it I was sending my information and documents in my backpack at an internet café in a fax—with the intent that the woman agreed to share my information to the training center as she shared my contact to its hiring manager. It would land me a job that day that would help me out of my situation. Things turned not quite out as I expected though. I was shifted like a ball to somebody else to contact for a training center geared to teaching children.
I took what I had and ran off to a train station after taking the public transit. Unfortunately I was shit for money and could not afford a high speed rail pass. The slow train would take thirty-two hours to get to my destination. I would have taken a room with a bed but all I could afford was a hard seat for the travel.
Things were getting better for me in the circumstance considering I had found someone willing to take me for work despite my visa situation.
The thirty-two hour train ride was horrendous in some ways, but mostly I was in excitement despite the circumstances. I’m always giddy when disappointed. I moved up and down the aisle of the train. I could not speak mandarin, but it did not stop me from trying to interact with everyone. I talked many ears off during the train ride. I went up and down the aisle trying to interact as a moth to porchlights—I could not stop even if I had wanted to. I found great enjoyment the times I did get to sit across a table from somebody my age heading to Taiyuan from Chongqing. They were a university student returning to their hometown. Another passenger who sat beside me was an elderly man with hard boiled eggs, he was eating one after another one. I highly enjoyed each and every conversation that I had. It was like my head was a lightbulb wanting June bugs to bang against it with the intensity of Roman candles shot at my mouth of nicotine tinged teeth.
“If you find someone in Shanxi it is practice to pay the family money before you can get married. You would also have to already own a home and a car,” told my new friend across in their seat from me—a university passenger friend named David.
“Not necessarily what I was looking for. When is the next stop for snacks?” When the train stops I am able to get out and to have a walk onto the platform to buy various goods from the vendors to take back with me to eat along the ride to Taiyuan.
I had all my important documents tucked in my bag. This included my health clearance and obviously I made no mention of my mental health diagnosis or history to the doctor who had to evaluate me. My diploma and TEFL certificate were tucked away securely. A TEFL is a certificate that stands for Teaching English as a Foreign Language, it qualifies me to teach English as a second language abroad—it had only took a few months of taking a course online that I had paid for to obtain.
It is easy to be happy when you can trick yourself as your own con artist. Mania can make you deceive yourself. One can be doused in napalm and still not fully recognize what is actually going on. Same goes the flicking of psychosis. Even when I have nothing I find myself in my radiating irritation the most qualified of things—the velocity of my rhythm sets me out of an orbit.
The pressure cooker keeps me moving like a propeller at times. I finally arrived at Taiyuan. I arrived at the station to be greeted by Ryan my manager and his assistant Jennifer. We had our hello and introduction and they helped me get to a taxi that would bring me to my new apartment. I finally had a residence again. Apparently they were desperate for a teacher. The last teacher was from New Mexico and apparently they pulled a midnight run—that is when a teacher in the middle of the night disappears onto a plane back home without any notification of it.
The apartment was okay. On the fourth floor with no elevator, so it was a bit of a climb up a dark stairwell not lit correctly.
My job was a training center that had a location near Yingze Park in the center of the city. I was to be paid in cash via envelopes. I would assist in teaching kindergarten all the way up to high school aged students there in private lessons paid by their parents. I would also be assigned by my company to various primary schools in the city. I would take public buses to various schools paid by the company I worked for to give English lessons as I bounced around to various classrooms and schools in the city. Often I would receive a phone call to avoid going to work that day if my boss got inside input that officials would be doing raids to check foreigners’ visas that day.
A taxi ride would always be a thrill. Caused me nerves at first, but I came to love the flying in dangerous ways along a busy road. I remember a driver beeping their horn away as they drove onto the sidewalk to pass people. They treated the pedestrians as if they were in the wrong. I came flying in front of a primary school at its front gates. I was going to start teaching a first grade classroom and a kindergarten classroom. The way schools are set up is with a wall around the entirety of the exterior of the school. There is a gate at the front where one or two security will be waiting to let people in and out of the complex of the school.
I walked in front of the gate to greet the security. It was my first time with an assignment at this school. The guard said they had never seen me before and wouldn’t let me in. Not a big nuisance while I called my boss who then called the school to sort out the situation.
I miss the classroom so much. I ended up teaching in China for five years at various training schools. After returning to Illinois, I still taught as a primary school teacher in a public school.
I often feel extremely ugly from inside to my outside, but something is attractive there. This does not come just in terms of flirting and relationships—mania makes me a genuine lightbulb that flickers in a way that encourages the insects to me—everyone looks like a June bug—this is what I have come to understand about life. But that ugly does kind of stay like rot in a cavity that leaves a bad taste in the mouth that smells foul—hoping nobody catches the smell near me—it must tie into my struggles with bulimia over the years.
The same goes for my years as a teacher—in relation to the whole lightbulb phenomenon—I’m positive it is tied to mania and hypomania. The younger students always were fixated on the information I was teaching to them. I kept over the years methods taught to me and self-taught that I found extremely effective with younger students when it comes to teaching.
Everything was physical in learning in terms of intensity and ambition. When teaching my first grade classroom I would create flashcards for the vocab we would work on and implement in creating new sentences with. We would chant these words together in a way that made me a clown while teaching. Students would yell out the word that I presented with intense enthusiasm. As I walked by students it was expected that while they yelled out the word they would also physically hit the card. Later I would also work on physical gestures and acting out of vocab words and they would follow the actions and phrases with me.
I would often eventually turn the class into two teams. When students got an answer right I would behave comically and full of energy—I would give them a high five and pretend they were so strong with it that it hurt my hand in the process with much exaggeration—the students always seemed to never get tired of this act.
One game I would play involved drawing two stick figures with happy faces on them. Each figure would represent one of the teams for the classroom. I would draw a hungry alligator under the figures. Their faces would also be comical in appearance and full of exaggerations. Each figure had a parachute placed over them and four strings attached. During the game the students would race to say the word correctly represented on the flashcard or the correct word for the gesture I was making. The team that was not the slowest would lose a string on the parachute. If a team lost all four strings they would fall to the alligator who would eat them. The students found it hilarious with my actions involved in it. I would also draw tears and a person praying to represent anticipation and worry of falling down each time they lost a string.
I had a tooth game too. I would draw too large faces for each team. The team that could answer the flashcards and gestures the quickest would have a tooth drawn in their mouth. The team with the most teeth would win and it would look rather funny as the mouth grew and grew with an abnormal and extreme amount of teeth.
I often did other physical and interactive games like having students run to the word I showed a card to or gestured—each word would be attached to a point in the classroom on a wall.
I know it sounds grandiose, but the parents always seemed to think I was great at my job.
The word vulnerable means so many things to me. That word is like the coal to form the generator that makes the guiding energy for the ethics I follow in my life—I hold very strongly to these values that have developed on how to live—I can express it more later but I greatly attach a kind of Christian value system to it, which makes sense considering I was raised in a Lutheran household and always went to church, Sunday school, and went to my courses and went through my confirmation—everyone is a bit of a mop—some pick up clean water and others dirty or a mix of it—waiting to find the people to drain them voluntarily or involuntarily. I was born vulnerable. I walk pigeon-toed and grew up tripping on my feet—I speak with a soft feminine voice. Bipolar disorder makes somebody vulnerable. There was much vulnerability in being eighteen and hospitalized involuntarily for my first manic episode—tied to a stretcher. I have almost a sense of us vs them—the vulnerable and those that harm the vulnerable—take advantage of the vulnerable—I feel this is a very much Christian in the idea of the unfortunate are more holy than the rest of the bunch—children are like that in terms of being born into a cruel existence—a cruel existence I felt at times in my life and so many do—making sure harm does not come to those in need gives the light of purpose to go bright inside like a Christmas tree in my brain—this light of happiness and warmth. I never expected I would fall in love for teaching due to the antidepressant effect provided. It would become my career for a decade. Some grow up wanting to be a teacher, I became one by accident, desperation, and being saved.
Sometimes I inflate on self-hate like a helium balloon that needs to be tied to a wrist. The vulnerability equation is imprinted on my brain.
In my early teens I started struggling with bulimia and image. I remember when my mother caught me in the act. I was not offered help but criticized. I was called a girl for my problems and threatened to be taken somewhere to be fixed of my confusion. I don’t identify as transgender. I identify as a man that struggles with bulimia and happens to have feminine qualities.
I attribute it to circumstances that happened to me—a justification for the pain at times—an attack on aspects of bisexuality.
After a long day of work I did what my young self often did. I went clubbing with friends. I feel like even if I hide aspects of myself such as being bisexual, people can spot it regardless. I’m extremely secretive about it and not comfortable displaying that vulnerable aspect of myself.
My friend from England went with me. He was about six years my senior. Big guy. Tall. The clubs name was Maoye.
I always enjoyed the free drinks available to foreigners—it was done to attract Chinese clients, as the idea was foreigners being there would attract people.
Amongst the hot and sweltering crowd a man grabbed ahold of me. I felt stuck. I was taken off guard. Pushed and cornered. While on me I managed to push him off. But it all serves as a reminder of the vulnerability of my life.
A nail was placed into my hand—a constant burn and reminder of that vulnerability.
Part 2
From self-hate I can also be so grandiose. I am like a Christmas tree that is lit up. Sparklers so pretty that you cannot let go of them, even if it burns your fingertips and hurts.
From heroin to sex, you can smother the pain. You drain the ocean to fill a void in these times. It ties to mania as well. That restlessness and irritability is extinguished by the paradox of throwing kerosene to everything burning. I’m so grandiose to hide my insecurities, I mistake my misfortune as a mark of something ugly virtuous—the neon of vulnerability pulsating like a star within me. Swelling on a pain.
Bad habits. I want you to judge me and tell me what’s wrong with me. Give me a verdict.
Stress a trigger for mania, and I was stressed from the incident I had experienced at the club. I bloated like a tick to distract from locusts of thoughts that could not shut up with their commotion.
I had been sleeping around more than before. My brain was Christmas tree lights. I accelerated on a generator—I made a mixed episode worse.
Tease a disaster when you are heightened like a blimp. Full of hydrogen. Hoping to burn up ad rain down like napalm.
When the pretty candles on the Christmas tree are left untouched—not looked at like a kettle on burner that has been forgotten—the dry neglected tree will into a house fire.
I’ve had four attempts in my life so far.
When I attempt I don’t cry for help. I feel too vulnerable. I’m afraid.
Hate police and wards.
Downing pills.
My past failed attempts made me aware of everything done wrong before. The sleeping pills alone might not do what I was looking for at that time. I bought an electrical cable. This way if it failed I would still be unconscious and choked out by the cord—fail safe plan to end my life.
The words coming out of my mouth slowed down. I started getting second thoughts. Stuck my face towards the toilet bowl while on my knees. Sticking my fingers down my throat. Leaving blood vessels bursting in my eyes.
Went stumbling outside and waved a taxi down and asked to be taken to the local hospital.
Never expected finding myself checked into a psych ward in a foreign country.
Nietzsche has a quote in reference to chaos in life and how it is needed to create a star—this reference holds so much value to me. Sometimes stars hit together just right to create fate out of the worst of things. The ward lead me to meet the woman made of paper. She would one day become my wife. I would have two daughters with her. Forge together as soldiers to face the obstacles in life. Someone who would save my life during a future attempt when I was found unconscious from an overdose. The smartest and toughest woman I have ever known. Someone to build trenches with.
I liked it when she stuck that needle in me for an IV. It must correlate to being a heroin addict. The pushing of something in my vein correlates to happiness and purity.
The woman made out of paper was my nurse in the ward I was stuck in. What attracted her to the mess that is me I will never understand fully.
The woman made out of paper is named Lilu. She was one year older than me and one of my nurses at that ward in Taiyuan. She was from Zhengzhou—a city in the province of Henan that is based in the center of China. I am sure as the reader it would be nice to know why I call her the woman made of paper.
She struggled with her own demons. She also deserves much praise for her resilience and brains. When she was born she was raised by a family that adopted her and often neglected and abused her growing up. Her biological family is distant from her, even though she has an identical twin—they felt too poor to take care of her and made the choice that they needed to be less of one child as she also has an older sister—her twin got to stay with that family but she was given up and adopted. I am sure this must bother her even if she never will talk about it to anyone in her life—as she is one to refuse ever discussing emotions and feelings, as this is not her personality type—she is very much a fighter. I think most would struggle with wondering why they were the one let go of—it also must hurt her knowing that the family would have a son and keep him.
Despite all these circumstances, she graduated top of her class of four thousand students—Chinese high schools can be quite large serving a large region—they often serve as boarding schools. She was a smart and hardworking student. Circumstances never made her stop trying to be the best and moving forward and she never made excuses for herself. In university she also did well and got accepted at the most studious and hard to obtain nursing position at the number one hospital in Shanxi.
I have already ranted and gone on about my affection and feelings tied to heroin. Drinking of entire oceans to fill voids.
Paper is a void. It asks for calligraphy to be written on it to make braille. This way when fingers run over skin, it tells worth—the reason for troubles—it forms connection through those words of declaration—the whining for why things are the way they are—the filling of a void like a heroin addict needing a cure—two papers come together to write upon one another—as a paper I am her typo—I stand as a falling mess with nerves like tripwire, I keep failing and losing my composer, while she stands stronger as a declaration that has been written on—when I was chased I listened to her and joined as one. I wish and intend to always serve the woman made out of paper who has saved my life and has always been there for me, being so strong despite circumstances—amongst the wind of turmoil in life I follow along her path.
It was love at first sight for her but not for me. I had no interest in dating her at the time. I worked across the street of that hospital in an office building for a training center as a part time job. I would teach adults English who paid for private lessons near to Yingze park in the center of Taiyuan. She signed up for classes for me to teach her and brought me food on almost every other day that she had prepared. Eventually we found ourselves coupled fully.
In a pit. I get to burn as paper amongst another’s paper. Eternally. With a life that will keep reoccurring.
Part 3 Liu
A woman like Chang’e lived on a moon. Far away.
You can refer to me as Liu.
At the age of 19 I was diagnosed with a severe nerve pain condition. It is called trigeminal neuralgia but you can call it TN for ease.
I was frustrated. I had completed a degree in international finances from Chongqing University of Business and Technology. The boom of the economy was not the same. There was an urge to “lay flat”—to not try as a form of opposition to everything going on in a waning economy in China.
All are elephants chained for an audience. People love to peek and stare as though they are glass doors without hinges—to be made feel useless.
I developed TN at the age of 19, and was now 22. It came as an arrow, and quite literally to the face. It’s a rare nerve pain disorder often considered one of the most painful conditions known.
The illness involves intense nerve pain throughout the left side of my face. It felt like someone was trying to pull all of the teeth on the left side of my face without anesthesia. The pain can leave me falling to the floor unable to speak or move while screaming profanities while choked by pain. A feeling of a knife to my face over and over again. It leaves me in absolute shock. Like Roman candles to the face. An absolute hindrance. The anticipation of not knowing when it will happen again is a nightmare at times.
The disease is often called the suicide disease, apparently up to 26% try to take their lives. In a state of panic during one of the nerve attacks I began swallowing any pill near to me. I went to the hospital to have my stomach pumped when I was found comatose by my mother.
I want to be Chang’e and on the moon and away from a world I have had enough of.
Gossip spread around the workplace that I attempted suicide over an affair with a married man. There was too much guilt to return to the workplace. COVID did have an impact to the economy. I still remember my hometown having dirt and trees piled onto the exits and entrances to the city keep people in their places.
The work I did find felt beneath me. China has what is called the great firewall that keeps something in and out of the country’s networks. A VPN was necessary to access American TikTok as it was used as opposed to the Chinese version.
Feels humiliating the nature of the outcome for me—I gave up in many ways like so many Chinese youth. For work I would go to a local office building. Amongst a long hall would be a room for live stream performers. I would entertain with watchers while trying to obtain virtual gifts for actual money. I despised it—sometimes the conversation could be funny or interesting but it felt hollow.
I would paint flowers on my face and wear hanfu clothing while doing ASMR.
I had a mind of sparklers burning until it burnt and stung like wax—like I had the option to stop and cry and those tears stuck as wax and burnt or I soldiered on and grew accustomed to the pain. I was an elephant chained. The audience watched and interacted with me on the live. I was a chained elephant when it was found out about my previous attempt and when the rumors spread.
Too many thorns in life. Nails hitting at the wrong points like an equation for something terrible to eventually happen.
My favorite dish was Henan noodles. I often cooked it with my mom. It provides great memories of childhood. I hadn’t talked to my mother as much as before. She moved to a job in Taiyuan.
Sometimes I would go up to visit her. But it was harder as she worked more and more hours. Sometimes voids build even when going through extreme nerve pain. And with trigeminal neuralgia, the pain was so intense that I would freeze and scream in pain. It cannot always be hid. It made me an elephant tethered.
Life can be like a pressure like no other. Too much stress. Makes one feel irritable with a mouth like a sprinkler of napalm when someone is too close. Life feels like a lit fire cracker held—in the end it would tear my hand up. Things kept building while the other side of my face began to hurt too recently. This was rare and not so common. My eyesight was becoming blurry too and it seemed I might have multiple sclerosis as the pain was on both side, it was not common for my age, and the blurry eyesight. An appointment was scheduled and I felt terrified to know what was going on and wondered if it was best to not even know my health.
I walked out of the studio and had a cigarette. My boss came out and joined to talk. He was concerned about view count and wanted me to do things to increase it that made me feel uncomfortable. He made a few comments I found incentive.
The boss sure liked to criticize and apply pressure. He was not impressed with my work and thought I could do something different. In China an application is used called WeChat. This application has many uses. People can display and share moments like a Facebook wall, message each other, send money, video chat, and even has a feature to find people near to you who are also looking for people near to them. I was to attract people onto dates. The idea was they would be lured in and the men would go to a set destination to a planned tea house that served snacks. When the men arrived (they had no knowledge of the setup) the bill would be at an absurd rate and if the men refused to pay larger men would use their size to force them to pay up.
I was not sure at the time yet if I wanted the job. Being worried about ethics and safety. It was something I would have to think about.
My medical expenses were growing and I knew the nerve disease could be expensive to treat with surgery. All I had was thoughts while looking at the moon.
Part 4 Taishen
My former roommate in the ward I shared a room with had paranoid schizophrenia. I was stuck in the same place due to mania, and just had gotten my diagnosis of bipolar disorder.
I was so pissed being stuck there and felt I had no business being there. I found my diagnosis to be an insult to me. I was only 18 at the time—taken in on a stretcher. Made me feel very vulnerable and irritated.
My roommate was having delusions related to Christianity and could not stop waking me up in the middle of the night to ask and talk about Jesus. Left me beyond frustrated.
He was drifting from his wife and would go on and on about intending to leave her. Felt he was spied and plotted against by her. So we were both frustrated with being there.
The toilets were special. They would flush what needed to be flushed but not certain things like pills—it helped to keep people from hiding they were not taking their medications.
He had tried to flush his wedding ring down the toilet but he did not realized it didn’t flush. I went to use the restroom later and saw the ring. I told him. He took it out. He found it to be a sign form God that he is to stay with his wife, and there was immense happiness in his eyes.