Hi all, bit of a long post alert. I moved to Ireland on a work visa and will have the Irish passport in hand (if all goes well) by late 2029. I am currently on 41K gross annual and it will likely go to 60K, if not higher, by 2028-29. I contribute 4% to pensions (around 200 euro per month) but most of my money goes to rent which is around 1400-1450 (including electricity). So, I barely save 200 euros per month. I have no debt. My queries are these: 1. Should I buy a house in the first half of 2025? I would only have saved around 30,000 in down payment but would be eligible for first time buyer scheme (assuming I find a house in Dublin 😅) 2. What if I decide to move to the US after getting the Irish passport (assuming I get US work visa)? For my job, the salary I would be moving to will be around 150-200K (guaranteed). Will I be able to rent that bought house and let the mortgage pay for itself in Ireland? I would be coming back to Ireland after US work visa (6 years) expires. 3. I plan on getting married in the next 2-3 years, should I wait before buying a house?

Renting out a partition for rent in Muhaisnah 4, closer to madina mall and bus stops. DM for further details

Hello, I am 24 and would consider myself relatively financially savvy. I have about $10k in emergency savings in a HYSA, and I just paid off two of my main sources of debt ($8k car loan, $5k medical expense). I've been contributing to a 401k for about a year. Right now I only contribute 4% and get a 1% match (company match is not great, this is the max). I think my 401k balance is around $4k. I plan on starting to contribute to a Roth IRA within the next month or two. I currently make $61k working in payroll.
Now that my main other sources of debt are paid off, most of my income is going to go to my student loans for the next year and a half or so - according to some bar napkin math, if I pay $400/week + some of annual bonuses, I should have them paid off by Jan 2026. I have ~$35k in student loan debt, and my net worth is about -$20k by my estimate.
What else can I be doing to save for my future and make sure I stay in the middle class? I try to not live above my means. My weekly paycheck is about $900 - $100 goes to emergency savings, $250 to rent and bills, $400 to various debts (credit card is almost paid off!), and I live off of the other $150. I've been following the flowchart for about a year now and I'm currently in Step 3, paying down debts. I can't think of any other relevant details that I have left out. Thanks in advance!

Helloooo!! 1 female roommate to fill a 4B 4B at Octave ‼️
I am looking to sublet my 4-bedroom, 4-bathroom apartment for the 2024-2025 year. Located on South 4th Street (Octave Apartments), it is close to downtown and has a bus stop right outside. The apartment comes furnished and features other building amenities such as a clubhouse, gym, and study rooms. I am looking for a vegetarian or someone who only cooks chicken/fish to join the three other female roommates starting in August. Rent is 1055 but I’m willing to negotiate! Dm me ASAP only if you’re interested please!!!

For context (m21), my girlfriend (f22) and my friend who I'll call H (m20) and his girlfriend C (f19) for the sake of anonymity in this post. I am also making bullet points for thoughts as I have them.
I have known H since we were 5 years old, we lived on the same block and would hang out often. We've been friends on and off for the last 15 years but we've been relatively close for the last 6 years. He started dating C when we were sophomores in high school, I had mixed feelings about them together because they were very different people and didn't mix all that well. They broke up a few months after for this reason. They began dating again our junior year and dated for about another year or so. Then they broke up again after graduation, but they got back together in December 2021 and have been together since.
I do not want to write anyone off as an enemy in this post, but to give my opinions and feelings about the current situation.
C is somewhat of a narcissist, she thinks that her and my girlfriend are great friends. My girlfriend does not feel the same way, C tries to talk to my gf about things but does so she can go back to talking about herself again right after. We also have another set of friends who are engaged and she is extremely jealous that we have other couple friends. C is also always asking uncomfortable questions about where we are and acting like we’re dating her.
My girlfriend and I have felt like both H and C take advantage of us to some degree. We live on our own and have been for nearly 2 years. They both live with H’s family for free. We have hosted them probably 20 times in that time span, we have provided alcohol almost everytime and just ask them to pay us back later. Sometimes that happens, sometimes it doesn’t. They get to crash at our house for the night and almost always C wants to do something the next day as well. Even if we tell her we have things we need to do. AND very rarely is it our choice what we do, she chooses almost every time. This brings me to my next grievance, we have bills to pay, my gf and i are 20 something’s with decent jobs but still figuring stuff out. We’ve suggested a day trip to a nearby state park, and even just a day on the lake renting a boat. But, C basically throws a fit because she doesn’t want to do just one day, she wants to stay somewhere for an entire weekend. Which is not in our ability to do and meet financial goals in the near future.
I also feel that C is a lia exaggerator, I know she had a traumatic childhood, but she has said that she used to live with one of my classmates for 4 years when she was a kid, I’ve asked friends who know that classmate well and they say it never happened. I have to be a downer for a moment but, I was sexually abused at various parts of my childhood and it hasn’t been easy. C says these things happened to her as well, but she wants to make it a pity party so I’ve never talked about my experiences. It rubs me wrong that she makes it about attention, and lies about other things for attention. So, I have no idea if any of it is even true. Which is extremely frustrating.
I’m jumping to recent events which have ultimately led to me making this post asking for help with mediating the situation properly and not ruining my friendship immediately.
We hung out with both H and C a few weeks ago and they picked us up and we headed to the bowling alley. About 30 seconds into the ride C is talking about Liquid Ass, which if you don’t know is a putrid spray that smells exactly like a public restroom at an interstate rest stop. She has a bottle of it in the car with her and she takes the cap off. It is the most awful smell I have smelled in a long time, I am gagging, my gf is gagging. Everyone is gagging except her and she is laughing her ass off. I can forget about that if it was the only time, but of course it wasn’t. We went to the bowling alley and she got a bit high which only made it worse. She sprayed it at the bowling alley and it was horrible, I was having a few drinks and was having fun regardless. We left the bowling alley and the only sober one was H, but he had to drive C’s car, which I understand she is protective of something that she owns and pays a lot of money for. Although, that was something she should have thought of before getting high in my opinion. Anyways, I’m sitting in the front seat with H, C is whining in the back about him driving. But decided the best idea is to spray the liquid ass in the car, and not just once but multiple times and it is actively hindering H’s driving. I decided I’m going to take it and throw it out the window, she was acting like a 4 year old so I told her if you can’t act like an adult, then shut up, and she did but made it a me me me situation where we then had to convince her to talk again which ended with me apologizing.
Since then, we have been trying to distance our self for a bit and it has truly felt like we have been watched constantly. They are both always photographing us while we’re out and about (we live in the same small town). They stopped us on a walk one day after I told them we were busy, in their car, scared the shit out of us. Very pushy and very uncomfortable. C also admitted by accident that she is always watching for my car to see if we’re home. It feels like being stalked. I don’t know how to go about the situation without ruining my friendship with H. He really loves her and if I told him what I thought, I’m sure it would put a riff between us.
Any insight is extremely appreciated, thank you. Sorry for the long post lol.

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A lot of these instances are BEC, but it’s all coming to a breaking point and I know that soon it’ll culminate into something huge because that’s just the type of person my MIL is.
My MIL and I always had a decent relationship pre pregnancies. She’s always been a bit overbearing and will say some questionable shit here and there, but she only really started showing her ass when I got pregnant for the first time in December. During that pregnancy she:
•announced to the family group chat immediately after we told her. Not even giving us the chance to tell her not to. Her exact words were “DH is having a baby! I’m going to be a grandmother!”
•always comparing our symptoms and experiences. I wasn’t nauseous or throwing up at all for my last pregnancy and she would always tell me “well eventually it’s going to hit you like it hit me and you’ll be miserable” like she was wishing I’d be sick or something.
•always insisting I’d have a girl knowing that myself and DH wished for a boy first because she never got her girl.
•offered to do the gender reveal, but only the cake that we wanted because she wanted to be the first to know the baby’s gender.
•didn’t help with anything while we were going through a big move, but wanted to do the fun stuff like paint the baby’s mural.
•her (literally) crazy friend offered to rent out one her homes to us, MIL set it up. We were all excited because it was a very nice house. We started moving stuff in. I unfortunately miscarried during this time and about a week later, while still grieving, her friend went insane, raised the rent on us BECAUSE our baby died, signed another renters agreement with some random dude while our stuff was still in her house, and told us to hit the road basically.
•after this, MIL still thought she could give input on where we live. lol no. Never again.
•the day I found out I miscarried, we went back home (were staying next door to her at the time) And the literal second we pulled up, she comes running out of her house (DH and she are NOT close like that at all. We lived next door and still tried to not see her every day) trying to make the miscarriage about her grief. At the time we were writing a goodbye letter to our dead baby, and DH told her to go the fuck away basically.
•I just found out recently that she took it upon herself to message everyone in the family to leave me alone and not bother me during the miscarriage because I “wasn’t in the right headspace.” So while I was spiraling mentally during the loneliest, darkest hour of my life thinking that nobody gave a fuck, it was actually my MIL inserting herself.
Well she chilled out for awhile and things seemed to level out… until I found out I was pregnant again in May…
•We didn’t tell everyone right away this time, we wanted to make sure we made it past the point we did last time. We were going to appointments in secrecy. During this time, DH stopped sharing his location with his mom for that reason. It always bothered me that he just let his mom have his location at almost 30, because she’d make comments when it was just the two of us like “I think DH forgot about his location being on (he didn’t, he just didn’t care enough to turn it off) promise you won’t tell him” but this gave him reason to turn it off. After we announced, she had the AUDACITY to ask me why his location wasn’t on. When I explained the very valid reason, she said, verbatim “Having his location, as a mother, is like an umbilical cord to me. I can’t eat or sleep if I can’t check and see that he’s okay.” Um. He goes to work and comes home. I have his location, if anything ever happens I’ll lyk. I told DH this and he admitted it was weird and agreed to not give it back to her and that when we go on vacation again (the reason it was on to begin with) he will share with his grandmother, but not with her.
•she tried to announce to the family again. DH, thankfully, intercepted and shut her down.
•she’s still doing her comparison bullshit. When she asked what my hope for a birth plan was, I told her I wanted to try an unmedicated birth. She said something along the lines of “just give it five minutes into labor and you’ll be begging for an epidural” followed by a long tangent about her “traumatic” (she tore, and not even badly, that was it) epidural birth.
•she wants to set up a nursery for our baby in her 2 bedroom house. 1) her house is and is always a mess. Trash everywhere, dishes in the sink, she doesn’t clean, doesn’t tidy 2) has 4 untrained animals running around the house pissing and shitting all over all of the floors. Including the cats. 3) the room she wants to set up for the baby is currently housing baby chickens and I don’t trust her cleaning ability enough to EVER get that mess out. 4) she’s always complaining about money and not having enough of it, wants to spend LOTS of money on shit for a baby nursery, and then will end up not helping us with Jack shit, I just know it 5) baby will NEVER spend enough time in her pigsty to need a nursery, I don’t even trust her to babysit.
•she’s been playing favorites with DH’s cousin’s baby already. Checks on them literally every day, calls, texts, whatever, and only checks on me and baby once a week, if even. This normally wouldn’t bother me because I don’t care to speak to her often, but it’s not about me. It’s about her literal biological grandchild that she is already deprioritizing, but wants to do all of this surface level shit for. I refuse to let my baby be a hip accessory on a Facebook post for her to get her little social media likes.
•the other day we were visiting DHs grandmother because family from out of town were here, cousin and her baby were there. When MIL walked in, she plopped on the ground and doted on the baby for a solid 5 minutes (they were at her house next door not even 10 minutes prior) before even acknowledging my presence or asking how I was feeling or how the baby was doing.
•after cousin and baby left, MIL mentioned that cousin conveniently wants to have her baby’s first birthday party on the same day we were planning my shower (the week of Halloween, I want a Halloween costume party themed shower) and that I have to compromise and pick a different day. She offered for me to do it three weeks before Halloween. Lol? No? That defeats the whole purpose. When I put my foot down she basically implied that she’d go to cousin’s baby’s birthday party and not her own grandchild’s shower, and that she wouldn’t help with anything (not like she would anyways).
Are the pregnancy hormones causing me to overreact?? This shit is rage inducing, no? DH is on my side completely. He’s had enough of his mom’s bullshit and is planning on having a conversation with her as soon as he can. She won’t be receptive, but I can’t deal anymore and neither can he.

My gf and I recently moved into our first house together renting, which we have both been excited to do for months. On the first night she got back in contact with an ex to let him know.
More context about the ex: it is not an ex boyfriend, it's a person who she cheated on her ex with (for me this makes it 100x worse). Her being in contact with this person has been an ongoing issue in the relationship and the only boundary I've ever really set. After the first time I told him I don't want you entertaining his conversation, after it continued I watched her block him on socials and told her that there is absolutely zero need for him to know anything about our relationship and that I couldn't guarantee I will forgive her the next time if it happens. Then I see his name pop up on her IG the first night of our new house. This is the 3rd time she's overstepped my boundary and feels like she is just disrespecting me. It was supposed to be the happiest night of our relationship so far in our new house yet she has ruined it for whatever reason. I confronted her in the morning after giving her the chance to own up as she knew I was in a mood. This makes me think she tried getting away with it without me knowing which isn't doing anything for trusting her.
The reason she gave is that she wanted to show the other boy that she was in a settled relationship and made a big step forward by moving in together, however I'm struggling to get into my head why she would go through the who process of unblocking him and accepting his follow request before even considering how this would upset me (if she even did at all). I also have to think of it from the boys perspective is that he knows he's been blocked by her then received a follow request from your ex-link, he would still know he's in her head and could still be in with her.
Other than this issue she's never given me a reason to non trust her however the same thing happening 3 times after I've set my boundaries seems too many. We've only been together for a year and the same issue cropping up 4 times in one year makes me think that it will absolutely happened again in the future no matter what she says. Whilst she hasn't physically cheated but does that matter if he's always in her head? She's jeopardised our whole relationship just to have this other boys attention which I just can't comprehend. I would never have dreamed of unblocking my ex just so she could she my new house.
When I confront her about it she just hysterically cries and apologises but that is what she did the 3 times previously, why will it be different next time.
What should I do next? Any advice/ opinions please :( :)

Hi mamas🥹 I'm a FTM (27) and 11 mos post partum this week. Around 6 months PP, PPD hit me like a truck and I have been struggling ever since.
Since my daughter was born last July, my father died of a sudden heart attack at 52 years old. My husband and I have rented an apartment, purchased a home, and have moved cities in the last year as well. We actually moved cities just a couple of weeks ago.
I work from home full time and have my baby at home full time as well. And yall.
It's not even 7 a.m. before I'm weeping and I'm on and off all day. I am so moody, I am having resentment ish feelings toward my baby and then feeling guilty for that. My husband works full time outside of the home and has since my daughter was 4 days old. He's a great partner, but he's got man eyes when it comes to daily upkeep of a house and a child. I'm totally at the end of my rope.
I'm in therapy, I'm seeing a psychiatrist and am medicated but none of it really touches the rage and the exhaustion and the feeling that I'm really just here to meet everyone else's needs and I wish i could just ✌️ out but if I'm not alive who would take care of my husband and child? The cycle of guilt continues.
Do you all have any advice for me? I'm tired.

Hello, we are group of 5 people and we are planing to rent RV in San Francisco to San Diego from 28.06. to 4.07. or (03.07.) as it is holiday in US.
We would like to drop of RV in San Diego and we are planing to visit a few national parks on the way down to the San Diego.
Do you guys have any advice what to visit and from what company we should rent RV from? Where I can check if there are some RVs that requres transfers from SF to SD?
Thank you for any advice/suggestion/info!

Currently, I am in a group of 4 (3 guys and 1 girl) looking for 2 more people to sign a lease for the upcoming academic year. We're looking at a 6 bedroom flat on Lawrence Road (50a). All bills are included and the rent is £95 per week. https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/141476996...The attatched link is the property listing. Ideally we need these spaces filled ASAP therefore if interested reply or private message me quickly so we can get it all sorted.
We don't care who you are as long as you're somewhat tidy.

My husband and I currently own a condo in a HCOL area, bought during COVID plus got it for a steal so we're paying way under market for our place. Monthly numbers of current home below:

• Mortgage: $1,300
• Property Tax: $630
• HOA: $250
• Beds: 3
• Baths: 2.5
• Potential Rental Value: $4,300 (we'd prefer to rent for the foreseeable future and not sell)

If we sell now, we have something like $125-$175K of equity. If we hold onto it and sell in 5 years, we'd likely be looking at closer to $200-250K+ based on current growth of home prices in this area.
We both work from home and both need a separate office space - tried working out of the same space previously and it does not work. We also are planning on having kid #1 within the next year, and would want to move somewhere with a better school district before they start kindergarten which gives us a ~5 year runway to buy a new place. Our current place is fine, but is a little cramped with just how much we're at home. Also, pretty much as soon as we have a kid we'd need to do some updates to make it work - mainly converting a walk-in closet into an office space and, if we're here for the next 5 years, we'd love to update the bathrooms. Looking at $30-50K in renovation costs.
Our other option is to buy a little sooner, but we're not sure if buying now is putting the cart before the horse. We know the area we want to buy in, and have a 20% down payment available (without selling our current place). If we buy now, we can put an extra $2-3K/month towards our mortgage. Or, we can wait those 5 years and have 50-75% saved for a down payment, accounting for inflation.
Info on a potential new home (we've been browsing for a few months and the numbers are based on a house that checks every single one of our boxes):

• Price: $835K
• Monthly Mortgage, 20% down, 6.8% rate: $4,355
• Property Tax: $2,088

Home insurance and utilities aren't included in the above, but look like they'll be ~a 30% increase, ($600 -> $800/month). If we keep our current place, we could put ~$1-1.5K of the rental income towards our new mortgage (I'd like to keep a buffer for repairs). Or, obviously, just sell our current place and put the proceeds towards the new home, which would lower our mortgage by $700-800/month.
This would be our next 20+ year home. We'd likely move in retirement/once our kids are in college, but definitely a long term place. Both of our careers were fully remote prior to COVID so we don't anticipate ever needing to move to be closer to work.
WWYD? Buy now or wait?
TC: $550-750K/year

For context (m21), my girlfriend (f22) and my friend who I'll call H (m20) and his girlfriend C (f19) for the sake of anonymity in this post. I am also making bullet points for thoughts as I have them.
I have known H since we were 5 years old, we lived on the same block and would hang out often. We've been friends on and off for the last 15 years but we've been relatively close for the last 6 years. He started dating C when we were sophomores in high school, I had mixed feelings about them together because they were very different people and didn't mix all that well. They broke up a few months after for this reason. They began dating again our junior year and dated for about another year or so. Then they broke up again after graduation, but they got back together in December 2021 and have been together since.
I do not want to write anyone off as an enemy in this post, but to give my opinions and feelings about the current situation.
C is somewhat of a narcissist, she thinks that her and my girlfriend are great friends. My girlfriend does not feel the same way, C tries to talk to my gf about things but does so she can go back to talking about herself again right after. We also have another set of friends who are engaged and she is extremely jealous that we have other couple friends. C is also always asking uncomfortable questions about where we are and acting like we’re dating her.
My girlfriend and I have felt like both H and C take advantage of us to some degree. We live on our own and have been for nearly 2 years. They both live with H’s family for free. We have hosted them probably 20 times in that time span, we have provided alcohol almost everytime and just ask them to pay us back later. Sometimes that happens, sometimes it doesn’t. They get to crash at our house for the night and almost always C wants to do something the next day as well. Even if we tell her we have things we need to do. AND very rarely is it our choice what we do, she chooses almost every time. This brings me to my next grievance, we have bills to pay, my gf and i are 20 something’s with decent jobs but still figuring stuff out. We’ve suggested a day trip to a nearby state park, and even just a day on the lake renting a boat. But, C basically throws a fit because she doesn’t want to do just one day, she wants to stay somewhere for an entire weekend. Which is not in our ability to do and meet financial goals in the near future.
I also feel that C is a lia exaggerator, I know she had a traumatic childhood, but she has said that she used to live with one of my classmates for 4 years when she was a kid, I’ve asked friends who know that classmate well and they say it never happened. I have to be a downer for a moment but, I was sexually abused at various parts of my childhood and it hasn’t been easy. C says these things happened to her as well, but she wants to make it a pity party so I’ve never talked about my experiences. It rubs me wrong that she makes it about attention, and lies about other things for attention. So, I have no idea if any of it is even true. Which is extremely frustrating.
I’m jumping to recent events which have ultimately led to me making this post asking for help with mediating the situation properly and not ruining my friendship immediately.
We hung out with both H and C a few weeks ago and they picked us up and we headed to the bowling alley. About 30 seconds into the ride C is talking about Liquid Ass, which if you don’t know is a putrid spray that smells exactly like a public restroom at an interstate rest stop. She has a bottle of it in the car with her and she takes the cap off. It is the most awful smell I have smelled in a long time, I am gagging, my gf is gagging. Everyone is gagging except her and she is laughing her ass off. I can forget about that if it was the only time, but of course it wasn’t. We went to the bowling alley and she got a bit high which only made it worse. She sprayed it at the bowling alley and it was horrible, I was having a few drinks and was having fun regardless. We left the bowling alley and the only sober one was H, but he had to drive C’s car, which I understand she is protective of something that she owns and pays a lot of money for. Although, that was something she should have thought of before getting high in my opinion. Anyways, I’m sitting in the front seat with H, C is whining in the back about him driving. But decided the best idea is to spray the liquid ass in the car, and not just once but multiple times and it is actively hindering H’s driving. I decided I’m going to take it and throw it out the window, she was acting like a 4 year old so I told her if you can’t act like an adult, then shut up, and she did but made it a me me me situation where we then had to convince her to talk again which ended with me apologizing.
Since then, we have been trying to distance our self for a bit and it has truly felt like we have been watched constantly. They are both always photographing us while we’re out and about (we live in the same small town). They stopped us on a walk one day after I told them we were busy, in their car, scared the shit out of us. Very pushy and very uncomfortable. C also admitted by accident that she is always watching for my car to see if we’re home. It feels like being stalked. I don’t know how to go about the situation without ruining my friendship with H. He really loves her and if I told him what I thought, I’m sure it would put a riff between us.
Any insight is extremely appreciated, thank you. Sorry for the long post lol.

Hi! I am getting ready to head out to Iceland next week with my partner and would love some feedback on our itinerary. We are not big planners, so we chose areas around the country that we’d like to visit, made hotel bookings, and started compiling lists of sights and hikes that seem exciting in each of those areas (or while on the drive between them) - the idea is that we will just reference our list as we go, and see what we want to do (and what the weather allows for). We are mostly looking to hike and see the country’s natural sights - we plan to take advantage of the long hours of light as well. We rented an F-road approved car with all wheel drive should we need it. Our broad itinerary is below, with notes about the few things we are doing that are set in stone - we would love your recommendations on if there are certain things we should not miss in some of these areas. Thank you in advance!! (Edited for formatting)
Day 1 - (Keflavik to Vik) Arrive to Keflavik in the morning, pick up rental car. Drive to our rental cottage in Vik, stopping on the way for some groceries - we may also stop at some sights on the way down. Arrive in Vik - go to sleep (we will be jet lagged). Wake up in the evening and begin Fimmvörðuháls hike around 23:00 (we are really hoping to do this hike since the day we booked this trip, but we know it will totally depend on if the weather conditions allow).
Day 2 - (Vik) Start the morning by ending the hike, take bus back to where we started. During the day, we will rest and explore the sights (Reynisfjara, Rútshellir, other). Dinner with some friends at Restaurant Suður-Vik.
Day 3 - (Vik to Höfn) Depart from Vik and drive to next hotel in Höfn. We’d like to stop at some sights on the way - such as Fjaðrárgljúfur and Diamond Beach. Visit Verstrahorn. Spend time in Höfn.
Day 4 - (Höfn to Bakkagerði) Depart Höfn and drive to Stuðlagil for hiking and sightseeing. Drive to Bakkagerði where we will stay the night (any recommendations for this area are welcome!).
Day 5 - (Bakkagerði to Ásbyrgi) Drive to next hotel in Ásbyrgi. On the way and once arrived in that area, there seem to be a lot of possible hikes or sights to see - some things of interest are Mývatn, Goðafoss, Hverfjall - we will probably decide as we go.
Day 6 - (Ásbyrgi to Ólafsvík) Longest drive - we will start very early (or the night before) and drive to the Northwest Coast - we will definitely stop to see Hvítserkur on the way, maybe other sights too. We must be in Ólafsvík by 14:00 for a whale-watching excursion. Explore around the peninsula after, then drive to Nyp where we will stay.
Day 7 - (Nyp - Northwest area) Hikes and exploring in this area, we have some possible routes saved - will stay in Nyp again this night.
Day 8 - (Nyp to Reykjavík) Depart Nyp, drive to Sky Lagoon for reservation. After the Lagoon, drive to Reykjavík. Explore Reykjavík sights or museums, get dinner.
Day 9 - June 21 More sightseeing in Reykjavík. Depart for airport in the late afternoon.

I (41F) have an older sister (46F) and younger brother (35M). We grew up with a mentally ill mother (72F)- NPD, BPD (1969) & as of 2013 Borderline schizophrenic. NOTE: THIS IS AN EXTREMELY LONG POST. My mother has refused her whole life to seek therapy or medicate herself as she believes everyone else is wrong & the world is out to get her. By 1999, my mother’s side of the family and my father’s side of the family cut her out. In 2013, my sister & I cut her off and my brother threatened to cut her off/withhold his financial support if she didn’t get help. She did so but for less than a year. My father (73M) was with our mother for roughly 28 years (1969-1997)before he left her due to the abuse. I was 14 when he left. After which, I became a target for her dysfunction and abuse for the following 24 years. Both my maternal grandmother and maternal aunt acknowledged several times before they died that my mother is mentally ill and treated me differently than my siblings. I permanently cut out my mother in 2018. For the record, I don’t believe either of my siblings are mentally ill but they both still have a lot of dysfunctional traits learned from my mother, from childhood, that they refuse to go to therapy for. I began therapy when I was 16 & continued to go for the next 22 years until my therapist retired. In 2017, my partner & best friend passed away. I have a son (13M) and was struggling to make ends meet. I have friends that live 4 hours away from my home town who offered to house my son & I so I could go back to school to get a better job. During this time my brother and his GF wanted to buy a house. They asked me for help to buy the house & said they would house my son & I while I went to school with them instead. I agreed. I used part of my retirement to help buy the house. The house ended up not being move in ready by Sept. 2019. I had to get a storage unit and find alternative living arrangements. Soon after moving in about 3-4 weeks later, we found mold issues in the basement and I had to move back out till before Halloween 2019. After moving in, I learned my brother’s GF was spreading a myriad of rumors about me which included- I was using them, not paying rent (I paid them 6 months in advance & began rental payments to them 2 months earlier than agreed upon), had too many guys over (I was not allowed to have guests w/o the GF’s permission) & by summer 2020, that I was abusing my son. I bent over backwards while I was living with them to make the GF happy. To the point in which if she didn’t have something to complain about, she would literally make something up and lie instead (it got to the point in which I began taking video which I showed my family, friends & brother). I addressed this several times with my brother & his GF to no avail. He admitted to me in early March of 2020 that she never wanted us there & only agreed to take us in because he insisted. Covid hit by end of March 2020 & we were stuck for a while- until the culmination of rumors got so bad that I had to move out last minute in July of 2020. I was able to move in with a friend temporarily to regroup. My brother has since admitted to me that he knows his GF (now wife) lied and that he has forgiven her. To save face, he & his now wife continue to tell people that I am mentally ill and thats why living with them did not work out. Yes, they still live in the house the three of us purchased in 2019. Fast forward to 2022. I still haven’t been able to go back to school. My son and I had been living with a roommate & former neighbor of ours since December 2020. Our rent went up exponentially & he decided he wanted to move back home several states away. I couldn’t afford to live on my own with what I was making & had to start using my CC to make up for lost income. I reached out to my sister (she lives out of state) and asked her if I could live with her for 6 months till I could get back on my feet. I explained to her my financial situation & explained I would need support with my son as my plan was to work my butt off for the next 6 months. She said she would give me a year. By Sept 1st of 2023, I got rid of 75% of all my belongings, rehomed my cat (sister is allergic), took out a storage unit and headed out of state with my son and our dog. I got hired on the spot with 2 jobs within 2 weeks of getting there though neither job began until October 2023. I did exactly as I said I would do. Went to work and began paying bills. During the time that I lived with her, my sister decided everything. I went along with her decisions since it is her house. She took in a childhood friend who was homeless on top of my son & I. She gave this friend over $500 while living with us. She hosted Thanksgiving & Christmas to multiple family & friends who came to stay with us. She “gave up” her salary at one of her jobs to keep two staff who were going to leave bc they weren’t making enough money (relying on my BIL’s income) & by December, they received a statement from the IRS claiming that they owe over $10,000 in back taxes. During this time, my son and I helped with chores around the house, helped out with their two daughters (10 & 5), and I bought groceries but never itemized what I bought bc I didn’t think I had to, on top of working 16 hour days and my son going to school (their daughters are homeschooled). I would ask them often if there was anything they needed & both of them stated several times “save your money”. When we got a shut off notice for water, I didn’t even ask. I just gave them the money. After Christmas, things got weird & my sister stopped speaking to me. I didn’t know what was going on, tried reaching out to her with a hand written letter but nothing. By January 2024, I was given 24 hours notice that we were going to have a family meeting with our father to discuss further living arrangements with her. I was given an e-mail with a list of 20 complaints. Many of the complaints were about decisions she had made but claimed were my fault somehow. Some of the complaints were flat out lies & others had some truth to them but were exaggerated. I was able to give my father text messages between us to disprove many things she and my BIL said. At one point during the meeting, they got caught in a lie in front of my father. I even took video of part of their home for certain things they claimed “we” had done that were in fact not a cause of my son or I. Since I had not kept or itemized my receipts, I could not prove anything about the groceries I contributed. My sister claimed at the end of the meeting that I owed her over $2000 (or $570/month) for living with her. My dad & I spoke privately after the meeting & I asked him if my sister had told him about 1. the extra person living with us. 2. That my sister gave up her salary or 3. That right before all of this she got a letter from the IRS. My dad said no to all three. I also contacted my former roomate and without context asked him several questions about living with him (to include my sister’s complaints). He asked me why I was asking all these questions & was baffled when I forwarded the email to him. We lived together for almost three years and I needed to hear what he had to say as I felt like I was being gaslit by my sister. She claims I “severely took advantage of her”. I have since refused to have contact with her unless our father is included in the texts. At which point, she got caught up in another lie to which my father cried afterwards because of the breakdown in relationships among his children. A week later sent my son back to our home town to live with extended family & moved in with a co-worker. My father wants me to be the bigger person and repair my relationships with my siblings. I refuse to. AITA?

(US-PA)i have been on leave ever since having my baby and have been waiting on the pay from the state. I paid some of May and was waiting for the money to pay the rest. He’s ok with paying weekly as long as it doesn’t carry over to the next month. So.. when the end of May came and I hadn’t paid the rest… he posted a notice on the door saying he’s ending the lease and I have to be gone July 1st. He posted it May 31st. It is now June 4 and he’s asking me for junes rent as well. I was more than ok with paying rest of May and leaving on or before the 30 days (the house needs a lot of work) but I wasn’t thinking about June since I’m being asked to leave. Am I supposed to pay ? I am also thinking about having him take it from my security. (When I moved in I laid first month, last month and full months worth for standard security deposit ) Advice ?

I apologize for the long post.
My girlfriend (30) and I (26) have been together almost 7 months. Things are great and it’s the happiest I’ve been in awhile. We have talked about moving in together possibly summer next year but one thing that really concerns me is her finances. From the start she told me she was not working. She was in a really bad accident a few years ago and has been unable to work due to having to have multiple surgeries.
So she has not had any income for years. Fortunately her parents have been helping her financially. She’s currently waiting on a settlement from the accident is trying to get disability in the mean time. She wants to work again but her doctor says she should wait. The biggest issue is she has terrible credit and debt. In her last relationship she was basically the breadwinner. She took out loans to help pay for things and hasn’t been able to pay them back.
She has had a car repossessed as well because she lost her job before the accident. She’s not sure how much debt she is in but guesses it’s 10k+. Her credit is in pretty bad shape as well. We’re trying to look up her credit score but I’m guessing it’s in the 4/500s. She has no savings either. Whenever she gets money she burns through it fast. If her parents give her money its gone the next day.
Her dad gave her $150 to get an oil change recently and she spent the rest of the money on alcohol, vapes and clothes. She never saves and spends. Even when she was saying what she wants to do with her settlement one of the 1st thing she said was buy new clothes. She wants to rent a house when we move in together but I told her I don’t see the purpose because its way more expensive and we don’t need that much space yet. If I’m renting I’d rather it be an apartment.
Another issue is she wants me to move by her (she lives an hour away). I get why she wants me to (her support system is here if she needs another surgery) but I’d be commuting 2 hours a day for work which is a lot not to mention I have a lease on a car and I don’t want to end up owing thousands of dollars because I went over the mileage.
There’s a chance she won’t be able to work full time again and that worries me because I know I wouldn’t be able to financially support us both. I make decent money but not enough for 2 people. I told her I think we should wait to move in until she gets more financially stable and she got upset. Am I wrong?

Hi All,
Seeking advice on the early termination of my tenancy.
Key point to note: there is no break clause so I fully understand it is at the discretion of the landlord to agree to early termination.
Property is managed through a lettings agent

• Fixed term contract (1 year, not rolling)
• We renewed last year
• Tenancy officially ends in early September

I asked the lettings agent for a termination of tenancy for one month from today (as stated in the tenancy agreement, however I suspect this is in relation to the official ending of the tenancy as opposed to early termination)
They came back to me with the following:
“I have double-checked your tenancy agreement and I can see that it does not include any break clause, therefore won’t be possible to terminate your tenancy earlier, I am afraid.”
I said: “Is there any flex on this if we are able to source a new tenant for the apartment ourselves and then we just sign a deed of surrender?”
They said: “Your tenancy agreement is a binding legal document and unfortunately, we cannot amend it or terminate it.”
I said: “I appreciate you explanation. However, per the government issued,”Help to Rent” guide supplied by yourselves, it states the following:
“If you want to leave the property within the fixed term or more quickly than permitted in the tenancy agreement, you should discuss this with your landlord. If your landlord or letting agent agrees to end the tenancy early, you should make sure that this is clearly set out in writing and that you return all your sets of keys.”
Provided agreement is reached, the tenancy agreement can absolutely be cut short and a surrender of tenancy be signed which supersedes the tenancy agreement.”
They said: “The early termination in under landlord’s discretion and in this case they would like to continue the tenancy until [Official tenancy end date].”
Other points: - The landlord is based overseas - We are paying c£300 less than what other identical apartments are going for so it would be in the landlords best interest to allow us leave early so they can increase the rent.

• the agent got their facts completely wrong in the first place and then jumped on with a reply about 20 mins later (bearing in mind the landlord is abroad and 4 hours ahead) saying the landlord has said they’d like the tenancy to continue.
  
• another point to note is that the landlord is moving to a new lettings agent for all his properties (totalling c40) so almost makes me think that the lettings agent is trying to hold onto anything they can before this happens.
  

Do I have any recourse here or options? As I say, they got the facts wrong in the first place and then turned around to say the landlord would like to continue the tenancy. I just don’t believe it.
If not, I completely appreciate that I have signed a tenancy till September and it’s at the landlords discretion, but I don’t believe the landlord has really been made aware of my request to end it early and has been informed of the facts that they could be earning more from the apartment. I’d just like to explore all avenues before waving the white flag as it’s not the end of the world, it’d just be ideal to move earlier.
Many thanks in advance.

Hey everyone,
My boyfriend is turning 21 soon and we recently discovered he may have really bad scoliosis. When he was younger I believe his bones grew faster than his body which lead to this and it has been giving him problems for a while. He may need surgery, and we’ve done research and seen that it’s a major surgery and could take up to a year for full recovery, and 4-8 weeks to be able to move around the house doing very basic things.
his family is horrible and he doesn’t live with them anymore so no financial support and we’re moving out in august to our first apartment for school (he has the year off and planned to work as I was in school and go to school the year after) We’ve already signed the lease & either way he’s coming with me as he has nowhere else to go and cannot return home.
So the problem is, if he can’t work construction full time as his plan was if he needs this surgery, he won’t be able to afford existing during recovery & paying rent. I can only afford so much to help and will do as much as I can but I’m on my own too. We don’t know much about the surgery, since it’s major is there any financial aid or support someone undergoing this surgery is able to get during recovery? I keep trying to search it up but google won’t give me many answers so I turned to Reddit.
The world is a rough place so I wouldn’t be suprised if there’s no ability to get financial support but idk what to do.
If no, are there any online jobs he could do? I’m searching indeed but most of the jobs are moving around and the ones from home require many degrees.
If anyone has any advice it would mean the world im just trying to figure out all of his options <3

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My time as a Jehovah's witness
This is a long story. Sorry in advance.
Here's a little background. I'm 20 Male, and living in the US. I've been in the truth since I could remember. Some of my memories aren't the best. Some are good as well.
I think being a witness is hard especially when we're kids. When I was 7, I wanted a action figure set of ben 10 toys. It was around Christmas time and I had a glimmer of hope for a big Christmas tree with presents. I know it sounds dumb, but I was 7. I had went to the mall and just wanted a Christmas miracle. I woke up on Christmas day and ran downstairs. There was nothing there except a gray light from the windows.
Another time when I was 8 was when I got invited to a birthday party. It was to a trampoline park, and I was excited. I ran home and handed the invitation to my parents. The invite came in a nice goodie bag with sweets. My parents took the bag, threw all the contents inside, ripped the invite up and threw it away too. I got a lecture about birthdays and such. As time grew, my love of birthdays died slowly and painfully. Like someone took my joy and slit its throat, my hope in birthdays and such died a painful death, slowly bleeding out.
When I was at school, parties sucked. I couldn't celebrate birthdays. When my classmates had birthdays, I wasn't allowed to have any of the snacks. I couldn't have cake, brownies, or cookies if it was associated with the birthday. I grew up not being excited for it at all. I felt numb on my last birthday. All I did was drive around aimlessly while doing errands. I think I got a new shirt? But I just stopped loving birthdays. When the class had any holiday party, I wasn't allowed to be there. I was sent away to one of the following places:

1. Hallway
2. School Library
3. Cafeteria
4. Front office

A small consolation was that the librarian would let me play on the computers, but most of the time I did homework early or just read books. I slowly saw more of the world, and it opened my eyes. I think that woke me up was when I was starting middle school. I met people who were LBGTQIA+, and I saw that not all people who weren't witnesse were bad. I questioned it more and more over the years.
When I was in high school, I got in trouble for unkept facial hair every week. I would get scolded every Wednesday and Sunday. When I was a senior, I discovered I am pansexual. I've had it hidden for years now. I'm afraid my parents will kick me out when I tell them I don't want to be a witness anymore. Do you know how bad it has gotten? I have done the following this in secret:

1. Got a new cellphone with my own phone plan and transferred all my stuff over so I won't have to worry when I move out.
   
2. Gotten an apartment that's insured. Paid the deposit and rent no problems.
   

2.B. I got the apartment partially furnished and with utilities on.

1. Looking for a car and insurance so I can fully move out.

Being a witness sucked. I had no life. Endless Saturdays of me preaching stuff. I hated myself for speaking against the LBGTQIA+ community. I spent most of my Saturdays and Sundays in a suit, handing brochures. All I wanted was to make my parents proud, but all I've done is gotten bits of praise with scorn. I'm not a Saint by any means. I've done dumb things, and I can acknowledge that. But to tear the spirits of others...its unforgettable. When I was 19, I was talking to a friend who was a witness. When we talked, she admitted to being sexually assaulted by fellow witnesses. When she tried to tell, it fell on deaf ears.
My advice to all witness kids wanting to leave? Run. Save up and become who you are meant to be. Because if you stay, a apart of you will die, and it's not coming back. I personally saved up money from my job and had decided to move out by summers end. Thank you.