Dr seuss one fish two fish

For context, I broke things off 18 months ago. We started talking as friends, about a year ago he said he wasn't interested in pursuing anything romantic, so I went no contact. I ignored the subsequent Hoover. I unblocked him briefly because I was ready to move on. a month later I called him out on some passive aggressive behavior and told him to basically leave me alone because I was not ready to engage. I also told him I did not want to be his friend. A month after that, he called me some nasty names to mutual friend, that's when I figured out he was a covert narc. We haven't had a conversation in person in almost a year.
Last night I ran into him at a bar where several mutual friends and I were enjoying some live music. At one point, somebody reached from behind, touch me on the shoulder, and said hello and my name. I couldn't physically turn around to see what it was so I was asked out loud, and he replied with his last name. I said nothing, just turned my head to the front and kept enjoying the music. This happened right next to his best friend, his best friend's wife, and two of my closest friends. One of those acknowledged that he saw the whole thing and it was very clear that I shut him down. He ended up sitting right behind me next to his best friend for the next hour, and he got to watch the back of my head having a great time with my friends, getting flirted with, and just being happy. It felt really good to just ignore him and send a message that he is insignificant.
There's a good chance he's mad, but he was already mad anyway from the narc injury seven months ago, lol. He hasn't tried to smear me because he can't, my reputation is golden in our social circle. I just don't understand why he would approach me considering I have him blocked absolutely everywhere and very clearly told him to basically leave me alone. He must've known I would reject him, can't possibly believe he can squeeze any more supply out of me, unless he was just fishing for some sort of emotional response that might embarrass me in front of our friends. If anything, he ended up looking like the weirdo for trying to talk to a woman who clearly wasn't interested in talking to him. Maybe now he'll finally leave me alone, lol. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I'll be honest, I'm that guy that picked it up for $20 because of the TV show. I know the game came out ages ago but when it came out my kids were young and my video game time was nil.
I wanted to share my thoughts, if anyone cares. Maybe no one does, but I'm guessing everyone here has played through a bunch of times, has a bunch of mods downloaded, etc. so maybe you will.
1) Dogmeat is annoying, I made Codsworth my follower out of frustration.
Literally shot that dog dozens of times since he would jump between my gun and the enemy trying to be helpful. Then had to stimpack him out of guilt.
2) The Sad Couple and Minuteman Mission Giver made me avoid Sanctuary.
I know it's supposed to be home, but I actually made my home the Drive in Theater instead where I didn't have to listen to the couple complain or risk being given another Minuteman mission that I didn't want. I made a really cool base (at least I loved it). Building was tricky, but I basically made tiers of society up to the top of the screen. Wasted a ton of time but had a lot of fun.
I wished I could have reserved the top bed for myself, but I basically had the King's Quarters on the highest level, my citizens the next level down, shops below that, then my workshops, and surrounded on the bottom level with turrets.
And then... My citizens kept getting trapped under the ramshackle palace, which was annoying. But otherwise building was fun.
3) I loved exploring the world overall.
The little sidequest stories found on various terminals were really cool. Especially the vault ones, but also finding little email arguments and whatnot. I always read what they said. Getting the special power armor chest from that lab was also cool, they should have had more stumble upon things like that.
4) I found all 3 factions distasteful, but went with the Institute as my choice.
The Institute was the least bad option, and it had my family loyalty. I also loved the backstory of how it was founded by survivors living in tunnels and that they created a paradise, and were still expanding underground.
I didn't like how the story tried to drive me into the arms of the railroad. Sorry not sorry: AI isn't people. Building a machine for a purpose and using it isn't "slavery."
Meanwhile the Brotherhood wanting to destroy everything and rule through military might just drives the world into further dystopia.
Did I agree with everything the Institute was doing? No. Replacing people with Synths and experimenting on people is obviously bad, and is too "Vault" type thinking, but it felt like the game wanted me to find out the evil part of the seemingly perfect society in order to push me into the arms of the railroad but didn't make the evil part all that shocking.
Sorry not sorry, but attempting to murder and destroy people over "enslaving" technology that they make themselves wasn't my cup of tea. So the Institute was the least bad of 3 immoral options. At least society isn't going to be a brutal fascist Brotherhood or run by people that want to stop using technology to improve humanity.
5) After the main quest line was over everything was meaningless.
It felt like a real lost bit of potential not to have a "part 2" to the game where you rebuild society. Fishing the main quest should have been the halfway point. I would have loved post-main quests based on your faction of choice. Like reestablishing the CIT. Cleaning it up and using the Minuteman network to recruit townships and create a functioning society.
I've glanced at mods and I don't mean "download a mod that makes this town look like it did before the fall". I mean like recruiting townsfolk to produce wall panels and machinery in one of the factories. Establishing local school houses. Using the Institute to invent some Environmental Rad Away Processors to slowly purify the lake water. That sort of thing.
Part of the hollow feeling was that the world didn't change. We destroyed the Railroad and Brotherhood, but then... It's just raiders and super mutants. No where to progress. Not even a cheesy montage with a time lapse of society improving over the course of decades and a credits scene. No closure. Just back to killing NPCs that are trying to invade Greentop again... Overall I enjoyed the game, just felt like it was unfinished.
I was only level 41 when I finished the main quest line too. Just did Minuteman quests for a while. I put off finishing it until I unlocked the final level of mods for weapons and armor, but probably would have been fine to finish it 10 levels earlier.
6) I also didn't love that I was required to unlock hacking and lockpicking to finish the game.
I was going to anyway, but the game sets up for customizing you're character and then forces you to build a certain way. I felt like I was required to have a high Charisma guy that could pick every lock and hack every terminal. If I wanted to be an ignorant brute just kicking down doors that option wasn't open to me. That master lock can't be picked? BS, I'm wearing power armor and can punch a giant monster to death, pretty sure I can rip a wooden door off it's hinges!
7) The fact that Deacon was supposed to be their idea of "cool" showed the writers grew up watching 80s movies.
It was laughable how big of a dork he actually was.

Hi everyone. I'm a beginner at looking after fish. I made a big mistake this Thursday, and I seriously hurt my fish.
He's an orange cherry barb, and I noticed what was a cut on it's stomach. By Thursday he had a horrific looking gash across his stomach with white parts protruding. I was horrified so I picked up the phone, called the nearby aquatics centre and I told the call handler that my fish had a massive cut on his stomach and that it's intestines were sticking out.
He told me that it sounded unlikely that the fish could be helped and that I should think about using clove oil to put him to sleep.
So I added one drop of clove oil diluted in warm water. He started thrashing and looked like it was in tremendous amounts of pain. I couldn't go through with it, put the fish in a jar and took him to the local pet store, told them what happened and begged for help. Turns out the white stuff protruding from his stomach were worms. I'm guessing the open wound is where the worms have eaten through? IDK.
Anyway, he's now in a small separate tank. I feel guilty for putting clove oil on him. I'm trying to keep him comfortable as possible - I don't know what the clove oil did to him and the stomach wound looks horrible.
The pet store staff said the water he is in quote "the PH is a bit high but it's not terrible." I've bought a product to bring the PH down but it doesn't arrive until Monday. I was thinking about replacing the tank water with bottled water in case it doesn't survive until Monday. I read online that this was a bad idea.
I'd appreciate any suggestions right now. Thanks so much.

So, I have a 12 gallon tank in my bedroom with a betta and four bloodfin tetras. The tank sits on my dresser which is backed up against my bedroom wall. Last night when I got home from work, I only noticed three of my four bloodfins swimming around, but at the time I figured it was just hiding and went to bed. But this morning, I noticed that there were definitely only three bloodfins I'm there, and I got concerned.
I took out all my silk plants and pretty much searched every corner of the tank, and no tetra. I checked the filter and still no tetra. I checked the area around my tank and even (carefully) pulled my dresser forward to see if there was a possibility that it might have jumped, and still no tetra. The only other explanation I can think of is that it probably died while I was at work and that my mom flushed it, but when I asked her earlier this morning she said that she didn't touch my fish and to let her go back to sleep. This one bloodfin tetra has just...vanished.
Not gonna lie, I'm kinda feeling like a failure right now.

Hello Dr. K and the HealthyGamer community,
I am seeking advice, support, and insights on how to emotionally separate and individuate from my parents later in life, which I should have done much earlier. The adult part of me knows what I need to do, but there's also a part of me that is frightened. Let me give you a snapshot of my life trajectory. The story is long, but I want to provide as much context as possible. If you prefer a short summary of my dilemma, please skip to the last paragraph. Otherwise, here is my life story:
I grew up in a well-to-do family in an East Asian country. My parents had me in their early 20s, just as their business began to flourish during the 'boom years.' Both came from very broken families. My mother experienced poverty, abuse, and neglect from her parents (she did not speak to her dad until he died and almost never acknowledges her mother). My father was the least favorite child in his family of three, dropped out of high school, ended up on the streets, and, as I learned a few years ago, was later imprisoned for fighting. My parents met when my mother was 19 and my father 21, ran away together, and built a very successful business in their early to mid-20s, becoming incredibly wealthy in a generally poor society.
Although we were affluent, my parents were never around. I started boarding at age 3 and spent most of my time outside school with my paternal grandparents and occasionally my maternal grandmother. My parents fought a lot. My mother once threatened to take me away and drove off with me with no specific destination. At one point, she told me she was divorcing my father, and we moved into another apartment for a day before returning home. She emotionally smothered me, saying she would die for me and that no one would love me as much as she did. She also hit me often over small things, sometimes in public. I thought she was better than my father, who, according to her, would remarry quickly if she left or died, subjecting me to abuse from an evil stepmother.
Despite our wealth, my mother took me out of an international school after six months and sent me to a state school known for being strict and militant. I was a 'good, smart kid' in primary school, but around age 12 or 13, I became very depressed and felt life had no purpose. I failed almost all my subjects except History and started drinking, influenced by my father's heavy drinking and a culture that tolerated alcoholism.
Then something happened that saved me in retrospect. My family emigrated to an Anglophone New World country, and I went to another boarding school. Despite experiencing racism and feeling self-conscious about my appearance, I improved academically and, by years 12 and 13, was among the best students. Between ages 13-18, I saw my father rarely, perhaps once or twice a year. My mother visited periodically, and they bought a house near the school, where I lived mostly alone. Like many first-generation immigrant kids, I handled most family matters because my parents couldn't speak English.
When it was time for university, I wanted to study law and politics at the local public university, but my father insisted I go to the UK or the US, believing a degree from the local university would not lead to a good job. He also prevented me from taking a gap year. I regret not leaving home to get a job. I applied to many universities and chose the worst-ranked one in London because I wanted to be in the city.
University was eye-opening. I discovered Europe and realized the world was much bigger than the conformist, conservative East Asian country and backwater suburbs I knew. However, my degree didn't prepare me for life, and my emotionally underdeveloped state made me miserable in adult relationships. I chose emotionally distant or abusive friends, hurt people who liked me, and did no internships or travel because I was expected to help my family during holidays. I wanted to stay in London, looked for random jobs, but had no life skills or work experience. Eventually, I returned to East Asia.
By then, my father had moved to a more cosmopolitan East Asian city, living extravagantly. I interned at a fancy company for almost a year, hoping for a job offer that never came. I soon found a job in brand consulting and finally started earning money at 23. I had a relationship with an older woman, but I was still emotionally detached. I tried freelancing, learned to impress others, and almost made enough to support myself, but I was fundamentally lost and unhappy. I experienced my first depressive episode and decided to return to London for a Master's degree. My father agreed to fund my education.
That year was the happiest of my life. I loved university, research, and being with smart, nerdy people. I met an intelligent, caring, and beautiful woman, and we moved in together. I discovered more fulfilling ways to live and found that success didn't mean working for an investment bank or being rich. I wanted to be an academic, applied for a PhD, and got in after two attempts.
Academia wasn't all rosy. The work conditions were awful, and the publish-or-perish mentality sucked the joy out of research. I loved teaching but quickly learned it mattered little at a 'research university.' I gained weight, my relationship deteriorated, arguments turned physical, and I felt worthless. The pandemic made things worse, and I felt I needed to radically change my life. My solution was to become the person my family wanted: filial, loyal, and rich. I was ready to abandon my life in London and move back to East Asia to 'stop being a loser.'
I returned home, trying to fix my family and shower them with love. I interned at a VC firm, but it clashed with my values, and I cried every day at work. I broke up with my girlfriend for someone with no emotional attachment, leading to great sex but zero intimacy. Within three months, I was broke, living in a short-term rental, and eating unhealthily. Fortunately, I had a therapist, a good friend in Shanghai, and my girlfriend gave me a second chance. I realized my family's emotional neglect contributed to my unhappiness and depression. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and medicated, which helped me move out of paralysis. I confronted my family about their past actions and my diagnosis. My mother reacted poorly, calling me names and accusing me of being a horrible son. This ordeal made me realize I needed to break away from them. What I threw away in London was actually the most valuable: a career, a family, my identity.
After confronting my mother that year, she vowed never to see me again. However, 6-8 months later, she sent me a large sum of money for my birthday. I let her back into my life, partly for financial help but also seeking proof of their love and acceptance. Things improved initially, but soon she started complaining about mistreatment by my partner. Then, my parents promised to buy me a flat and pressured me to get married. I accepted the flat for stability and freedom, ignoring their past behavior. Predictably, the flat became a tool for my mother to control me. She threatened to sue me if my girlfriend moved in and disputed the flat's ownership just weeks before the move-in date. I have a demanding job and spend much of my day dealing with this situation, processing the emotional toll of my mother's actions. I feel unsafe, violated, and confused. I hear a voice telling me this is all my fault and that I'm too weak. I know what I need to do cognitively, but emotionally I'm paralyzed. Do you understand what I mean? What would you do?

So basically there is this nearly 30yo guy. We met at work, where we have seen each others like 2-3 times. He reached me out recently by a text.
Basically he is almost daily asking how im i doing or how is work etc. He kind of has implied pretty clearly he has somewhat interest in me. I try to take conversation to somewhere by telling about my day or plans etc and asking questions from him, but his answers are 99% of the time something such as "it was ok" or "im fine". Sometimes if i ask enough questions there might be some small details like he was fishing but that is that.
Aand this makes me confused as fuck. Is he just bad at texting or is he just not that into me? I kind of want to ask him out, but this habit gives me feeling he is not really interested after all. I also makes me feel im just interupting his life when im the one who starts talking.
I swear im not good at this either and this gives me headache cause i think he was nice when me met and i would love to know him better.
Should i give up?

Hey there, I need some advice on whether it's appropriate or just absurd to send a birthday letter and a small gift to my ex-girlfriend. Our situation is a bit complicated, so here's some background:
My ex and I had a relationship that spanned two significant periods. We met, got together, separated (without discussing it at all; we just drifted apart), and then almost a year later, we got back together. We broke up for the second time about three months ago.

• In our first relationship, we had significant lack of communication. I was very avoidant and stressed, which made me distant even though I wanted to be with her and truly loved her. She tried to connect with me, but I just couldn't reciprocate. After our first breakup, I realized what went wrong and started to work on myself, digging deep into my issues and aiming for personal growth. She unknowingly pushed me towards this self-improvement journey.
• We rekindled our relationship around six months ago. This time, I was the one trying to connect, but she had been through a lot in the past year, including a traumatic event, which I won't go into detail about. She wanted the relationship mentally but was emotionally too hurt and tired to commit fully. She has a lot on her plate: a full-time job, started her Bachelor’s studies, and has issues at home with her parents. After two months, she chose not to continue the relationship, feeling it wasn’t fair to me as she couldn’t be fully present, although she saw that I was willing to stay, fight for us, be patient with her, and sit in the mud with her.
• During our breakup talk, I gave her a therapeutic gift so she can draw in her alone time or whenever she likes (she loves to draw but didn’t have many opportunities to do so in the past year). We ended things positively, holding hands while walking around the park and saying "see you later" instead of a formal goodbye.
• I've been focusing on personal growth since then and am not looking to get back together. I genuinely see it as better for her to have the time to heal and get stronger. I wish her all the best because she deserves to be happy.

Her birthday is coming up, and I want to send her a short positive WhatsApp message to congratulate her and say that I've left her something small in her mailbox, hoping it will bring a smile to her face. The gift I want to make it handmade, along with a letter expressing my congratulations and appreciation.
My Conflict: I don't want to overstep any boundaries or make her feel uncomfortable. My wish is simply to make her something special. I aim to respect her space while showing this kind gesture. However, I worry about the potential of triggering negative emotions or discomfort.
So, the question is: Should I go ahead with this, or would it be better to keep my distance and let her celebrate without any of my input?
Any advice or similar experiences would be greatly appreciated.
P.S.: I'm ready for any feedback, and if I seem like I was or am a jerk, believe me, I have heard it all from myself. I really don't like the version of myself from the past year and there is really no excuse for my actions and the way I neglected her and our relationship. I also see things I still need to improve.
TL;DR: Ex-girlfriend's birthday is coming up. We broke up three months ago after a complicated relationship. I want to deliver her a handmade gift and letter but worry it might be inappropriate or make her uncomfortable. Should I go ahead or keep my distance and just send a normal message not too long and not too short?
Thank you in advance!!

https://preview.redd.it/v514u3bs7y3d1.png?width=2000&format=png&auto=webp&s=abfd3ad3ee72aa223c916ba10c1d0660daf1705e
I can't be the only one who thought Jake's character sounded like Steve-O, right? He fits too well with a middle aged Spicemancer and the tweeked out goblin just trying to find some fish thieves.

Hey guys.
So originally I was first rejected from my originally choice to Morocco due to an ACL operation 2yrs ago (to which my doctor cleared me for with, and I kid you not, with a 20 page detailed letter) then I was accepted to Indonesia, to which medical rejected me due to a shell fish and gave me a hard due to ACL and Dental. The placement team has now found three other location options in eastern Europe and one of them is Montenegro.
The program still aligns to my original interest and from some brief Google searches, Montenegro seems like a nice opportunity. And the timeline for departure is reasonable.
PC has only been in location since 2018 so it’s not as established as other locations. Are the any PCV or RPCV’s who can speak on Montenegro and the process of making through Medical.
Best
PS. I also feel like I’m being strong armed. There are other locations and programs that I’d rather do but I run the risk of going through the application process and not being accepted.
my enthusiasm to serve is still high, but god am I drained. I applied to AmeriCorp- Vista in the mean time and already going through interviews

I am 9 months postpartum and had a high-risk pregnancy, so lots of stress and anxiety on top of my normal day-to-day anxiety. Plus postpartum anxiety and depression. I developed an eye twitch throughout pregnancy, but my B12 was never tested. I had my eyes checked a few months postpartum because it got so annoying and all looked good.
I am nursing and my daughter showed signs of a dairy and egg intolerance when she was three weeks old, so I’m not consumed any dairy or egg in 9 months. I also don’t eat a lot of red meat and never eat fish.
I went to the doctor a few days ago for a physical and mentioned my eye and wanted to get my blood checked. Turns out my B12 is 177. My anxiety is SO bad though and I can’t help but to feel its more serious. After getting one injection and starting to supplement for a few days, I’m starting to get some body twitches- is that normal? The doctor is so nonchalant but I want to make sure that I’m taking the right dosage and taking the right steps. Any recommendations are appreciated. What other bloodwork should I have done?
Also, I know being postpartum, nursing, and being dairy free, probably contributed to this and it’s probably the B12 deficiency giving me symptoms and its not anything more serious (me reassuring myself here lol)

I’m with my bf for 4 years, going into 5 this July. There’s one thing that makes me sick and I can’t forgive easily, and that’s lying. He knows that from the moment we met, I can’t stand lies and I always want the truth even if it’s bad news.
Throughout this years there have been 3 to 4 events where I knew the truth about something, I tried asking him about it and giving him the chance to explain himself to me, but he just straight up lied to me. It was really intense because the first two times I couldn’t give him evidence that I know how things happened so he just continued with a lie. He managed to confess a day after, or even some times months later in a random conversation where we both were “fine” so he felt comfortable saying he was lying back then and that I was right about the events.
He has just started at a new job, where he is the only guy there among other 2 guys and a lot of girls. I had a work opportunity outside our country so at the moment and for 4 months I’m going to be abroad so it’s been even more difficult for us. I catch myself getting insecure sometimes when a woman I don’t know is involved, but I try to soothe myself because I do know he loves me and that I’m being unreasonable with those thoughts. For the whole month that I’m away, we always speak on the phone and two hours pass by with him rambling about work and always defending one specific girl at work. Yesterday, while he was at work, I texted him and he didn’t reply but was active on instagram. I don’t check that in any way and I don’t care, but it happened to show his profile to a friend I met here so I saw he was online and thought “he’s here but doesn’t reply to me” and thought about making fun of it because I do like teasing him. When I was at his profile, the following went up when I refreshed it, and I found out that it was the girl he’s been so much mentioning from work. I’ve already sent him a teasing message, and he replied that he wasn’t on instagram. Then, the story changed to “her sister called him on insta”. That’s a straight up lie because he never speaks on insta with his sister. He sent me screenshot of the “call”, which was made at 17:28 from his part and ended the same time from his part again. But I’ve asked why he doesn’t reply to me at 17:10, where supposedly he was speaking on the phone with his sister. I knew he was on insta to accept the request from this girl from work, so I just wanted him to tell me the truth, it’s not even a big deal. But the way he lied to me and made up stories rather than just saying that made me feel sick. I might overreacting but I physically can’t stand lies, I wouldn’t lie to anyone let alone the person I love. He was keeping up with the lies until the end of the day, even though I have him a lot of chances for him to just say the truth. At midnight, on the phone, he finally said that he was on instagram because this girl sent him a request but that happened during the end of his shift, around 20:00. He was still lying to my face so I just said to him what happened and how I knew the story and knew he was lying the whole time about something so so minor. He finally confessed that all the stories he told me was a lie, and he justify it that he “wasn’t thinking and was an immediate move to lie to me because he kinda felt guilty about it”.
I know it’s a minor issue at the moment of the way it happened, but it has happened before with much bigger problems, I’ve always told him that I can’t respect someone who lies to my face and is fine about it, but I just can’t help myself to think of how he was okay lying, and how many other “lies” I might have believed only because I didn’t know the truth or didn’t have the ways to prove my gut feeling. He says he won’t ever lie to me again and that he don’t want to lose me. I love him and I also don’t want to lose him but I do feel overwhelmed and can’t stop thinking about how he lied straight up and even got offensive when I tried to tell him the truth.
TL/DR: my (22F) bf (27M) lied to me but I knew the truth and I feel overwhelmed of the way he tried to gaslight me.

tl;dr: Will two powerful fans, be better than several smaller fans at getting air through a pipe?
Hello there!
I'm doing an experiement with getting hot air out of my gaming room. I know.. there have been many posts with people attempting this, but I'm not expecting mindblowing results, just maybe a degree or two cooler gaming experience.
So, the pipe isn't going to be directly attatched to the back of my pc case, as I don't want to hinder it's ability to get rid of hot exhaust. Rather, I'm going to place an open "collector box" of sorts placed a couple of inches behind it, with the pipe going a relatively short distance before exiting out my window.
My question. Is there any benefit to having say five 50cfm(cubic feet/minute) fans distrubuted in the pipe, instead of my initial thought of just smacking one 150cfm fan in the "mouth" of my "collector box" and one 150cfm fan in the pipe exit sticking out the window? The hot air would only need to travel about 45 inches, but something I see people mention besides generally "air preassure won't be powerfull enough", is that the length of the pipe is a relevant factor in the forces the fans will have to fight. And of course, if you have additonal knowledge or ideas, like what kind of cfm would actually be required for it to work etc., I'm all ears :)
Extra stuff. For combatting the outside wind resistance blowing into my pipe, I'm thinking about installing some oneway "shutters" inside that will block strong wind. If nothing else, then maybe that will spare the fans from getting blasted with wind, making their job harder and reducing their life span?
I plan on placing the outermost fan some inches into the pipe, so it won't get wet etc.

I’m with my bf for 4 years, going into 5 this July. There’s one thing that makes me sick and I can’t forgive easily, and that’s lying. He knows that from the moment we met, I can’t stand lies and I always want the truth even if it’s bad news.
Throughout this years there have been 3 to 4 events where I knew the truth about something, I tried asking him about it and giving him the chance to explain himself to me, but he just straight up lied to me. It was really intense because the first two times I couldn’t give him evidence that I know how things happened so he just continued with a lie. He managed to confess a day after, or even some times months later in a random conversation where we both were “fine” so he felt comfortable saying he was lying back then and that I was right about the events.
He has just started at a new job, where he is the only guy there among other 2 guys and a lot of girls. I had a work opportunity outside our country so at the moment and for 4 months I’m going to be abroad so it’s been even more difficult for us. I catch myself getting insecure sometimes when a woman I don’t know is involved, but I try to soothe myself because I do know he loves me and that I’m being unreasonable with those thoughts. For the whole month that I’m away, we always speak on the phone and two hours pass by with him rambling about work and always defending one specific girl at work. Yesterday, while he was at work, I texted him and he didn’t reply but was active on instagram. I don’t check that in any way and I don’t care, but it happened to show his profile to a friend I met here so I saw he was online and thought “he’s here but doesn’t reply to me” and thought about making fun of it because I do like teasing him. When I was at his profile, the following went up when I refreshed it, and I found out that it was the girl he’s been so much mentioning from work. I’ve already sent him a teasing message, and he replied that he wasn’t on instagram. Then, the story changed to “her sister called him on insta”. That’s a straight up lie because he never speaks on insta with his sister. He sent me screenshot of the “call”, which was made at 17:28 from his part and ended the same time from his part again. But I’ve asked why he doesn’t reply to me at 17:10, where supposedly he was speaking on the phone with his sister. I knew he was on insta to accept the request from this girl from work, so I just wanted him to tell me the truth, it’s not even a big deal. But the way he lied to me and made up stories rather than just saying that made me feel sick. I might overreacting but I physically can’t stand lies, I wouldn’t lie to anyone let alone the person I love. He was keeping up with the lies until the end of the day, even though I have him a lot of chances for him to just say the truth. At midnight, on the phone, he finally said that he was on instagram because this girl sent him a request but that happened during the end of his shift, around 20:00. He was still lying to my face so I just said to him what happened and how I knew the story and knew he was lying the whole time about something so so minor. He finally confessed that all the stories he told me was a lie, and he justify it that he “wasn’t thinking and was an immediate move to lie to me because he kinda felt guilty about it”.
I know it’s a minor issue at the moment of the way it happened, but it has happened before with much bigger problems, I’ve always told him that I can’t respect someone who lies to my face and is fine about it, but I just can’t help myself to think of how he was okay lying, and how many other “lies” I might have believed only because I didn’t know the truth or didn’t have the ways to prove my gut feeling. He says he won’t ever lie to me again and that he don’t want to lose me. I love him and I also don’t want to lose him but I do feel overwhelmed and can’t stop thinking about how he lied straight up and even got offensive when I tried to tell him the truth.
TL/DR: my (22F) bf (27M) lied to me but I knew the truth and I feel overwhelmed of the way he tried to gaslight me.

Day 30. I’m lucky enough to be on a remote fly in fishing trip I booked a while ago. It seemed like the culture was fish hard the gather at the bar and swap stories. It was a fun day but craving all day long. And every f’n country song the guide played was about drinking. Every one (although they all probably are :). Headed to the bar before dinner and thankfully they had some NA spirits. And thankfully I asked, was sooo close to saying f it. That fake gin and sprite in a regular mixed drink glass was enough to calm me down. Slept 10 hours and feel not hungover this morning. Thankful for the small win :)

Do you have a trope that you can’t seem to stop obsessing over or writing about? It can be any trope but I have a few that get stuck in my head or all I can read for awhile.
I love friends–to–lovers and that seems to be one of my all time favorite tropes. Along with fish–out–of–water. I obsess over these most of the time and love–triangles.

Feel free to chat if this looks familiar.
For as long as I can remember, I have never felt like I belong. Never really appreciated or enjoyed anything. You know that feeling when you are watching a show / genre that’s just simply offputting to you? That’s life for me. The world is fundamentally dull.
But that’s just depression. Here’s the curse:
Ever since I could talk, I would always ask ”why” after ”why”. No explanation was enough if there was more behind it to see. I absolutely have to get to the base of everything. And when I eventually do reach a stopping point, I am left with an empty feeling. I need something that so perfectly meets and goes beyond my grander-than utopian standards, and even then, it will not be enough. Be it a ”soulmate” or meaning of life, I don’t know anymore. I am ”grass is greener on the other side”, personified. Nothing amazes me, as everything is after all, very rational, as that’s what I must make it. In gutting any and all concepts and people alike into ”whys”, they inevitably lose their charm.
In this endless longing, I need something supernatural, something out of this world. And it’s excruciatingly contradictory, as I am very rational and will never accept religion nor dogma. I also absolutely won’t allow myself to find a subjective meaning, as that’s like settling for me. It’s irrational, I know. I need an objective meaning in a truly subjective world. The stongest childhood memories I have is me wishing that I found Narnia, or that a Venator class -Star destroyer landed and swooped me into the clone wars. Finding the Isekai genre later didn’t help much.
In my mind, I have gaslighted myself this far. ”Maybe you will find something truly magical next time”. Endlessly peeking around the next corner, knowing what’s there, but expecting more. Self imposed dissapointment. The only thing that’s kept me going this far is the fear of missing out in case something actually were to show up. Chasing ghosts.
It’s not like my life is bad, on the contrary: In my endless search, I deemed the best option to keep most doors open, and managed to do excellently. My life is even a priviledged, ”prestigeous” one. That’s why I wanted to remove possibilities of shelteredness, and looked to war and the military to feel. Nothing there either, be it how good or bad, no experience fazes or is enough for me.
Despite all this, I feel like I am in a movie, but the main plot is going on somewhere far away, and I am cursed to never cross paths with it. A longing, a persistent melancholy. I belong somewhere, but not here. Every day I search, even ritualize things to the point of OCD, you name it, just to get there. It’s like a masochistic engine, running on psychological torture and the carrot on the stick is just a mirage. The driving feelings are tragicomic grit and spite. Looking for that place over the rainbow. And deep somewhere I know, that it only ever existed in my mind.
And I know that the day I fully accept this will be my last. That’s something I will make sure of. That day just seems to come ever closer, as I’m running out of energy.
Tl;Dr: A combination of insufficient pleasure hormones, and a paradoxical worldview. I don’t really think there are words that will help here. Just wanted to write this down somewhere. I’m still very young, so I’ll hang around for about a year or two at least. That’s as far as these winds can blow.

I'm in the early stages of boat shopping. I thought I was looking for a Jon boat or a bass boat but I've had 2 salesman at 2 different dealers tell me that I should be looking at a small pontoon. I've been reading, researching, and flip flopping for months trying to figure out if they're right. I'm hoping you all can give me some first hand, life experience insight.
I grew up with my dad and grandpa always having bass boats and Jon boats. I've been on large rental pontoons but never known anyone who owned and trailered one. I have a wife and kids now (8 and 10 year olds) and they really want a boat. So, I'm looking for something that 4 people can fish comfortably on. We're not skiing or partying, just enjoying family time and fishing. The lakes we frequent within a 1 hour drive all have either electric/trolling motor only restrictions or 9.9 restrictions. The dealers have me eyeing a 16' Lowe and a 16' Tracker Bass Buggy. I have a Ford Maverick AWD truck with a 4,000 pound tow capacity. I tow a 2,500 pound camper no problem with the Maverick but I have never tried pulling a boat out of a slippery ramp with it. Other people in the Ford Maverick sub-reddit are pulling bigger pontoons with their Maverick and claiming no problems. I drive an F-350 for work and tow regularly with it, plenty of towing experience just not with a boat on a wet ramp. Whatever boat I buy would be towed to and from my home every trip and stored in my backyard or possibly under a metal building or carport in the future.
My main concerns on the pontoon are the size and price. Even the 16' pontoons look way bigger than the 16' Jon or bass boats. It'll look like a monster behind my tiny Mav and from what I've read, pontoons can be a pain to tow. Also, there are zero 16' used pontoons near me. When I search for used models nationwide, they are not much cheaper than a new one so I think I'd buy a new one if I go the pontoon route. As for price, I planned on putting $10,000 down for whatever boat I buy. I can afford $25,000 for a 16' pontoon, I just don't know if it's worth it compared to what I can get for $10,000 used or $18,000 new in a bass or Jon boat, especially when I'm going to be limited to a trolling motor or 9.9.
I realize that this is a decision that my wife and I have to make. I'm just hoping to get some advice or thoughts from those with experience here instead of a salesman making commission.