Wake up jaw tight

Amahahn was seated at an oval table, a velvety dark green cape with golden hems and patterns draped over his shoulders. Three bowls of Shamal stew were placed on the table, vegetables and fine cut pieces of meat floating in the simmering Kahnjari milk.
“Three bowls. Are we expecting company besides our own, Amahahn?” Emma raised a brow as she plucked the visor cap off her head. Amahahn’s response was a chuckle, low and dry.
“Oh, you must be terribly informed. I’m married to a daughter of one of the noble houses on Kouvajilo”
Emma clenched her jaw and fists, slipping into one of the chairs. She placed her cap on the table, glancing over her shoulder as a door opened.
A young woman with olive skin in a white dress stood in the door, hands clutched at her front. A golden belt sat tight around her slender waist, her sleeves large and loose on her arms.
“Laudjehne, love. Come dine with me and our guest” The Prince Regent motioned to the empty seat at his side.
The girl dipped her head, the white dress floating behind her as she moved. She glided to Amahahn's side, fingers tracing his shoulder as she seated herself.
"It's an honor for me to share the same table as you, Empress. I've read your grandfather's books quite actively"
Emma blinked at the sleek face talking to her.
"Oh, yes. My grandfather's books..." Emma mumbled, picking up the wooden paddle-shaped spoon. She lifted her eyes to met Laudjehne's gaze.
"I've just read 'On the Building of the State' and 'The Laws of Steel and Soil' Laudjehne said, stirring her Shamal. Amahahn scoffed with the ghost of a smirk spread across his lips. Laudjehne's rich blue eyes fell upon her husband, her thin throat bobbing.
Amahahn drew a finger along one of his pale cheeks, his vicious smile persisting. The Prince Regent cast his dark eyes on a steward concealed in the shadows of a corner, the man striding forwards with a clay bottle of sweet wine.
Emma nodded her thanks to the steward, plucking her cup from the table and stirred the orange liquid.
"There's something too that interests me about your grandfather, Your Majesty" Laudjehne said, swallowing a spoonful of the beige stew.
Emma hummed her approval of the inquiry as she drank, the sweet finish of the wine dancing over the taste buds on her tunge.
"It puzzles me greatly how your grandfather persistently denies Goudanja and Kouvajilo's request to be annexed into Simonistan. Why would an empire ever turn another state's request for be anexed into it?"
Emma lowered her spoon, swallowing down her rambling thoughts as well as a spoonful Shamal.
"The Constitution of Simonistan does not permit acts of imperialism. Even if the other party willing approves of annexation into Simonistan, we cannot legally carry out such a request within the boundaries of our legal code"
At that, the Prince Regent chuckled. Emma felt heat flare across her cheek, yet she jutted out her chin to disapprovve of Amahahn's taunt. Already, she knew what was to come.
But Amahahn never dared bring up the topic.
"Oh...that's lofty principles to stand by" Laudjehn murmured, batting her blue eyes. Emma sensed her confusion but chose not to clarify. After all, she could not not clarify her grandfather's mindset.
Perhaps, if only she hadn’t taken so much after him; safe for his openly revolutionary rethoric and lingering autocratic aura, she would have annexed the union of Goudanja and Kouvajilo in a heartbeat.
That very popular man who it pained Emma to know, still considered himself an unrighteous dictator, yet cheered her on as empress.
Her grandfatheer the abdicated emperor, who she honored by making him Speaker of Parliament just so he might keep an eye on and help her during Parliament sessions.
“You wish for your home world to be annexed by Simonistan, Laudjehne?” Emma asked, swallowing down a spoonful Shamal

Hi I just came across a novel, chosen by the moon novel by izabella W. Its on pay by chapter websites, I've opened and read a few chapters but I can't seem to find any free version or chapter version anywhere. Please help. If anyone has read it I'm willing to take spoilers. Here's the advert I found below of it on Facebook.
Lycanthrope species is a disgusting race. And I, Delan Riley, am nothing more than a human scum in their eyes never expected those species would turn my world upside down. Since when the lycans managed to penetrate our town, like in the early 1900's we have a hierarchy, upper class = the lycans, middle class = mated humans, and lower class = the normal humans, who were basically considered scum. I endured their torment day after day, vowing to run away from them one day, until that day came and everything changed.
Dylan POV "Humans," I scowled at the principal's words from tannoy. "The Alpha twins will be celebrating their birthday tomorrow, as such, festivities are in order." Oh great, the Alphas twin children. Adrian and Arya are the worst lycans alive. I swear just because they are the alphas kids they literally get away with everything. If their birthday is tomorrow, then the wolves are going to be worse than ever. "All students will be present to greet them, two lines will be made, with humans on the left and the lycanthrope on the right. Any mated human will be at the front of the line for their year, you will all also be in order of your school year. That is all." Chat broke out the minute the tannoy was finished. "We haven't had a school gathering since the alpha king visited three years ago, before his sons coronation." Nick was right, the last time we all gathered like that was for the king and queens visit, when he decided to let the world know that he was to renounce his title to his only child, son Josh. "That sick bestard, he wants to make sure everyone is there so those idiot twins can find their mates." Yes I was mad, my fists connected with the table in front of me once more as I thought about how disgusting the situation was. You see the twins will be turning 17, so it's very possible someone in our school could be their mate, finding a mate is sacred to a wolf, the minute they say that one word your fate is sealed. They will turn your mind, morph you into being a lover of their kind, and then you'll give in.

That won't happen to me, I'm growing old to see the world as it once was, and I'm going to choose who I'll be with. No one will take that dream away from me.

Once dinner was finished, I just wanted to sleep. I'd had a very long tiring day, I quickly sat down on a small stool my mother kept in the storage closet and removed my shirt while my brother Freddy sat at the table to do his simple homework. It wasn't long before my mother came in with a large bowl of warm salt water and some cotton, this was going to sting I just knew it. She was here to help me with the wounds caused by wolves yesterday. She slowly began to unwrap the bandage from around my torso and slowed down drastically when it came to the final layer, I felt it peel off every wound and my fists clenched in pain. "Jesus!" I heard my mom exclaim once the dressing was completely removed. The air on my back was nice though and I sighed as my arm covered my once again exposed brests. "This is more than 15!" I began to hear sniffles coming from her and sighed turning round to look at her face, only to notice tears streaming down it. "Mom I'm fine, it's alright." She shook her head. "It's not alright, I'm your mother I shouldn't let these things happen. I'm so sorry. Your father would have..." here she goes again. Every single time something happened she'd always bring up dad, it really annoyed me because no matter how much we all wish he was here, he just isn't. My father was kiled by THEIR kind, almost 5 years ago when they actually managed to take over. When the lycans managed to penetrate our town my father rose up with some people from the neighborhood, to defend our livelihood, it was futile to say the least. We lost many people and I watched as my dad was ripped apart by two fully shifted wolves, I ended up shoting him to stop his suffering before they dragged me to the courtyard, i was the person to receive the first lashing of the town when I was 12! The wolves have been pretty strict with me since that day. "Stop being stvpid!" Was I harsh? Definitely! Did she need to hear it again, absolutely. "Dad is dead, we don't know what he'd do because he never knew this life. He never knew this world." I know what he'd have done, most likely attacked the guy who held the whip and got himself kiled in the process. "The best thing you can do for me, is stop crying and help me, next time don't insist on helping if you can't handle it." She began to wash my open wounds with the warm salt water causing loud winces to leave me, I knew it was necessary to prevent infection, but my god it hurt like a betch. "Some of these are really deep Dylan!" She sniffed again and my eyes rolled in my head. "I told you, I'm fine, just wrap me back up so I can get to bed." My mom was obviously more impacted by my injuries than I was, I suppose that always the case though. When it's happening to you, you've just got to get through it but when it's happening to someone you love, you just want to take their pain away. She quickly placed a fresh bandage around my waist and chest and wrapped it tightly for compression. The bowl of water that was used was now red in color, I guess from the blood my back was dripping with. "Can you keep your head down please? At least just this week. You can't take any more lashings." I simply nodded before standing up away from the stool, I walked over to Freddie and ruffled his hair in affection. "Good night squirt." He giggled and fixed his hair slightly. "Night Dilly." I smiled walking upstairs to my little bedroom, as soon as I was inside i shut the door and flopped down on to my bed on my stomach and I took a minute to cry to myself at the pain in my back, what my mom did was important but it hurt, not that I'd ever tell her. My hand covered my mouth quickly to muffle any noise I might be making. I couldn't tell anyone, I had to be strong because more and more people were crumpling these days, and my mom would break if she knew how much I was suffering. Sleep followed me shortly after, she was right though about me needing to keep my head down for the time being, I could not take another lashing! After a long night and an even longer morning, we were all finally stood in the hallway at school waiting for the twins to arrive. "Mine!" Everyone that was stood in the hallway tensed up, as we were seniors, me and Nick were stood towards the very back of the human line. All the mated people were situated directly opposite their wolf mates in their years. We stayed silent and still as Arya walked down the hall and stopped directly in front of Nick. His eyes widened in fear, unsure of wether to look up or keep his head lowered. "Look me in the eye, mate." He glanced at me slightly as if asking what he should do. "I said, look me in the eye." He slowly moved his eye line up to look at her face. I took a glance myself to see her eyes pitch black with lust. "I... can't... I mean... erm." Before he was able to mutter anything else, two wolves from opposite, grabbed him out of the line and dragged him behind Arya. "Hey!" My head shot up before I could stop myself. My mouth also forgot its place as I jumped out of line. Everyone's head shot to me as my eyes widened in realization at what I'd done. Adrian, the other twin, walked up to me before punching me right in the stomach, I doubled over instantly. Feeling the sting in my slightly healed back. "I know you... You were publicly flogged only two days ago." God I hate this guy. "I also have it on good authority, that you openly spoke out against our rules and regulations in yesterday's class." My head shot down the line slightly to see Erin, looking a little frightened, her mate, the beta to be was looking at her, nodding his head in reassurance. "You traitor, you grassed on your own kind?" I yelled at her before feeling a fist connect with my cheek. My head whipped to the side from the force, while my class members gasped. I'm so done with this treatment, right then, I wasn't in charge of my actions. My fists curled up and my stance became a lot more defensive. My head snapped up to the alpha to be, and I looked him in the eye. "You don't know the meaning of the word disrespect." I suddenly hurled my fist towards his head, which he easily dodged, but my foot came up and kicked him instead. He stumbled backwards from the force with wide eyes. "You... you Actually hit me!" He didn't even sound annoyed, more shocked. Everyone in the hallway was watching, waiting for the alpha to do something but instead he simply stood up straight, regaining his composure. "I think everyone should get back to class." He began to walk away, following his sister when I called him back. "What about Nick?!" "Simple, He's my sisters mate. He now belongs to her." Argh, he's not an object. "He's not her property." A chuckle left his mouth, before turning his back to me again. "All humans are property." A short while later everyone made it to science class, our teacher Mrs Mathews is mated to the lycans pack doctor, she also now has a four and two year old with him. She was one of the first humans to be cohered into a false relationship. "What were you thinking young lady?" I rolled my head at her before looking at the empty seat next to mine. Nick was with that stvpid wolf girl right now. Being changed, I'm so angry it's ridiculous. "I was thinking, this guy is being a prick. Did you hear him? 'All humans are property.' It's bull shet." I looked up and the whole class looked at me like I had three heads. Talking shet about wolves is one thing, but talking about an alpha is punishable by death, attacking an alpha is an even worse offense. There was then a knock at the door and in walked Erin and her band of mated bestards. "Sorry we're late Mrs." "Erin, how are things between you and bata Monroe?" She blushed, the traitor actually blushed at the mention of his name. "He spoke to me last night about trying for a baby. We need a good strong boy to take over as beta." I scoffed looking at her as she took her seat. "You guys are actually pathetic, why can't it be a girl? Those mutts are basically Neanderthals" I voiced my opinion and saw all the shocked faces around me. Calling the lycans mutts, is the same as them calling us scum. After lesson had ended the entire school was called into the hall for assembly. This is where any human who has been found to have broken the rules were punished, usually 10 lashings were goven out or something similar. "Welcome to the school assembly, congratulations to the alpha twins for finding both your mates. Now on to the business at hand, as the 5 year anniversary of the new world is coming up, we have been informed that the alpha king will be visiting our district next week, this is very exciting news. We want you all to look your absolute best, she wolves and mated females will wear exemplary dresses made by seamstress. Male wolves and mated men will wear tailored suits. Anyone who doesn't comply will be reprimanded." The Alpha King?! No one has met him yet, he took over the throne three years ago when he turned 18. He really didn't make any appearances though, great, this month is going to be a nightmare. "As for the humans, you will be given a new uniform to wear for the visit, these are to be neatly ironed and worn to the highest standard. As for the following humans, based on your attitude this past week, you will be coming to the front and facing punishment. Tony summerset?!" Tony's head shot up as he looked around, he was in the year below but he shared my views when it came to the lycans. He slowly walked up to the front of assembly, almost instantly his top was t0rn in two and he received 10 lashings. A girl named Kara was next and she too received 10 lashings. A few more people went up slowly accepting their fate then suddenly my name was called. "Dylan Riley." Inside I was terrified but I simply shrugged my shoulders, I guess I did kind of expect this. Although I'm not sure if my back can take any more damage. "You attacked an alpha, correct!" His eyes bored into mine as I bowed my head submitting to his authority. "Technically, no." Everyone in the school gym looked on in fear, as my head moved to the front row of the wolf side. Adrian sat, with a werewolf girl in the year below, her name was Jana, I guess he found his mate. Nick and Arya were no where to be seen though. Adrian gave me a shrug as if to say he didn't tell, before smirking at my comment. "He hasn't officially taken the alpha title yet, so he's just..." i looked at the principle and noticed his eyes black and his claws out, he was in what lycans call a half shift, triggered when the subject has become angered. He turned to two security wolves and gave them a nod, Almost immediately i was forced onto my knees, my arm was slammed on a table and held in place by one wolf, while my body was held in place by the other. "Ok, I don't think this is needed, I have alpha blood, a stvpid human girl can't hurt me." My head snapped to Adrian who had stood up in front of the school to stop what was happening. "Nevertheless, humans need to know their place." With that the pressure on my arm increased as our principals hand pulled my sleeve up before a long claw punctured my skin. The searing pain shoting from the fresh wound had my eyes scrunched and my fist clenched, I bit the inside of my cheek hard instantly tasting blood, however no sound left my mouth. He continued to write, using my skin as a canvas and his claws as a marker, it went on forever, my vision blurred slightly at one point as I turned my head away. After minutes of torture, he was done and the pressure on my arm eased, instantly I snatched my arm away, hissing through my teeth at the pain. I was about to scurry off stage, when I was roughly grabbed yet again, my arm being held in the air by the principal while my feet were inches off the floor, blood dripped from the wound and the pattern he had made was on show for everyone to see. Loads of people gasped, even the wolves looked slightly horrified at what had happened. "This is what happens when a human decides to speak out. I can promise, anyone who so much as says one word about our way of life, will have the same punishment." My arm was starting to seriously ache from being held in the air for so long, and the lack of blood flow to my suspended arm was causing me pins and needles, still I refused to make a sound. I held the tears back and I bit my cheek harder causing more blood to fill my mouth. "That's enough Bradley!" Adrian growled, he was still stood up and looking at the scene in front of him. His eyes hard as he stared at the principal a low warning growl erupted from his chest which had the head teacher gulping, he quickly let go of my arm causing me to crash to the floor. A small cry left my mouth as I hit the hard floor. Immediately I scrambled away, my foot just missed the high step leading to the stage and I fell, waiting for the impact of the ground, but it never came. Two strong arms wrapped around me catching my weak body causing me to look up, my eyes widened as I noticed Adrian had caught my falling form. "This isn't part of the human punishment program!" Adrian growled causing me to tense in his grip, I pushed him away from me before fixing my uniform top. The room was deadly silent, taking in the scene in front of them, while I stole a glance at my forearm. Carved into my skin by his devastating claws were two words, words that would most definitely scar my body for life. 'Human scum' "Lessons must be learned, she received lashing merely two days ago, and clearly it had no effect on her." Another growl left Adrian's chest as he stepped on to the stage, I wasn't bothered though, you would think I'd be ashamed but I simply smiled slightly. I fixed my sleeve a little so it wouldn't rub on the fresh wound before speaking. "It doesn't matter," the whole room looked at me shocked by my attitude. "I would rather be labeled human scum, than have any resemblance to your kind. I'm proud of what I am, how many of you can say that?" After my amazing little speech, I walked right down the middle between the humans and lycans and out the door. No more compliance, I'm going to get away with as much as I can without getting into too much bother. There will come a day when the lycans power will fizzle out. When it does I'll be ready, I'll be waiting for the day we take our world back. As for the best part about my plan...

No one can stop me.

"Ouch, not so hard." I seethed as the school nurse cleaned my new wound with antiseptic. "If you had of just kept your mouth shut, this wouldn't have happened." I turned to my right looking out the window at the few clouds that were floating in the blue sky. "Like I said, I'm proud to be human, and now everyone knows what I am." I clenched my fist together as the nurse began wrapping a bandage around my forearm. It had been a good few hours since the incident in the hall, and I had been forced to come to the nurces office after I had tried to clean my wound by splashing it with water from the tap, it also refused to stop bleeding. "You are impossible. Can you please just try and stay out of trouble? For one day, that's all I ask." Our school nurse is a wolf, she's one of them. However she hates the way they treat us mere humans, she thinks we should all just live in peace with equal rights. Like that would ever happen. "All I've done is stay out of trouble, but you are just going to humiliate me anyway, so what's the actual point?" "The pack were discussing a public execution, Dylan. You need to walk on egg shells from now on, not just for you but for your family as well." No ones been publicly executed in over 4 months, I'm flattered they're considering it. They only execute people who they believe are the biggest problems to society. "Well then... I'm flattered." I chuckled, before looking at the patch job. 'Huh, not too shabby.' I quickly stood up from the human nursing station and pulled the sleeve of my shirt down covering the evidence of ever being hurt. "This is serious!" I just gave her a blank look before leaving the room. On the way out I heard her call back to me. "Please just think about it." I gave a clipped nod as I walked away wondering how I'm going to tell my mom about this. Later in the evening... "Dilly why you say that?" Freddie looked up at me with a mouth full of bread. "Don't speak with your mouthful!" My mom scolded him as a bashful blush made its way to his cheeks. "Sowwy mommy." His reply was muffled as he swallowed the last chunk of food. "I said it Freddie, because it's the truth. The wolf race are a pathetic excuse for..." my mom cut me off with an extremely stern look. "Dylan! They have ears everywhere, one more word out of you and it's your room." I scowled, my hatred for the Lycan kind growing stronger as each day passes. "What more can they do to me, lash me? Beat me? Brand me? They've ran out of options." I stated slamming my hands down, then severely regretting it as sharp pain shot though my wound. "What was that?" My head shot to regard my mothers worried expression. Her eyebrows were raised and her eyes were dull and judging as she looked at me. "Nothing, it was nothing." I quickly took my plate in my hand and began to walk to the kitchen. "I'm not really hungry, and I have homework to do!" My mom caught hold of my forearm causing me to drop my plate suddenly, I watched it slowly fall before shattering on the floor. I retracted my arm quickly and turned to Freddie. "Stay there and don't move until it's cleaned up ok sport?" He just nodded with wide eyes, I turned back to my mom and noticed her curious stare on my arm. Her grip shifted to the other side as she turned it around before pulling my sleeve up. The bandage was showing and a bit of blood was seeping though after the wound had been disturbed. "What the hel happened?" My moms eyes widened as she began to fumble with the bandage. Before she could unravel any of it I snatched my arm away. "I had an accident at school. No big." I began to gather the large pieces of the broken plate up ready to put them in the bin. "What did you do Dylan?" She looked at me with pure worry and only then did I realize what the wound must look like to someone who didn't know. "For gods sake! I didn't do it to myself! I got publicly punished at the assembly alright? It's no big deal." Her face dropped instantly and she stepped towards me, causing me to step backwards. "Mom, I'm ok. So back off will you." "What did you do? I've never known them to cut someone's arm as a punishment." Her shock and accusation was evident in her voice and I sighed heavily. "I spoke against the alphas son." I may have hit him too, but I wasn't going to divulge that part to her. "It's not one big cut, mom, it's a brand, 'human scum' carved onto my arm." "They've branded you now too?!" My eyes rolled at her hurt tone as I went to get the dustpan and brush. "You're so much like your father." A sigh left her mouth as she spoke, running a hand through her hair, while I quickly swept up the little pieces of the broken plate. "You've had a new uniform delivered. It's laid out on your bed. Dylan, Please just try and stay respectful in the future, I don't want my daughter to be completely mutilated. Although you're not far off." "Gee, Thanks." I then walked over to my little brother Freddy before blowing a kiss into his neck and hearing him giggle. "So sport, how's school going?" "It's ok." He shrugged before going back to coloring a dinosaur picture in. "Well that's good, stay out of trouble, ok little man?" Heading upstairs and into my room, my thoughts wandered to the permanent graffiti scar very slowly healing on my arm. Disgusting beasts. Think they own the world because they're faster, stronger and can shift. Pah. If you ask me they are not all that.

The second I walked into my room my mouth dropped open. On my bed was some grey pants laid out neatly, which wasn't the surprising part, no, what shocked me was the grey high neck no sleeved button down shirt, every single set of uniform had sleeves except this one. They've done this on purpose those, mutts. They want the world to see my arm and know what a disgusting creature I am. They want the world to know that I, Dylan Riley, am nothing more than 'human scum'.

During the last week, I've been horrible, in class I've been loud in voicing my views, I've insulted at least everyone to some degree, I didn't care about the consequences, and I certainly didn't think about them. I haven't seen Nick at all since he was claimed, and to make matters worse today was the royal visit. Oh yes, werewolves and mated humans alike were spending every waking minute preparing themselves to meet his royal majesty, king of the wolves. Unclaimed Humans however would rather stick pins in their eyes. "Dylan, get down now... you're going to be late." She was right, I was dawdling this morning, I really couldn't be bothered today, I gave myself one last look in the small mirror and sighed when my eyes met my newly uncovered brand. It had bad bruising around the letters, and was still extremely tender to touch, it was definitely healing now though. I made my way down the stairs and came face to face with my mother who was seeing to Freddie, she was helping my brother get his coat on when she turned to me. "You ready sport?" Freddie nodded his little head at me and smiled while I quickly slid my shoes on. "Just Remember, the alpha is bad enough, Dylan, please, please don't do anything to anger the king." My mother stopped us from walking out the door to tell me something she had been telling me continuously for the last couple of days, it was almost as if the entire human population of our district was expecting me to do something stvpid. "Try and have a good day." I rolled my eyes but nodded, even I know not to push the king, he could kil me in the hallway like it was nothing. In fact I plan on staying out of his way for the entirety of the day. "We will see you tonight mom." I stated before me and my brother began our walk to school, his little hand clutched my own tightly as we went. Usually Nick would be with us, as he lives next door, well he used to, now he's residing in the main pack house. I quickly dropped Freddie off at his school and watched him get the wolfsbane neutralizer before walking into him building giving me a small wave before he went in. With my new scar on complete show, and my figure being complimented by the skin tight shirt I was wearing, I sauntered down the street to school, I gave my name and year in and took the wolf's bane neutralizer injection with no problems at all. It was finally getting into school that the problem occurred. Walking through the halls I was met by many looks, some of pity some of disgust. You see every single non mated human in the school was wearing a long sleeved version of the uniform I was given. All the Wolves and mated couples were scattered around in fancy floor length dresses or tailored suits. As I turned the corner I noticed a couple, now this couple happened to catch my eye the most out of all of them because it consisted of Arya and Nick, eating each other's faces off. "What the hel!" Nicks head shot to me as his eyes widened. He too was dressed in a tailored suit, a navy blue tie hung on his neck to match Aryas dress. Why was this happening all the time? It's always my friends that get completely brain washed. I shook my head in disbelief before turning my back on him. I heard his fast footsteps behind me as I rounded the corner. "Dylan?!" He ran right in front of me, stopping me in my tracks, making me drop my bag off my shoulder and almost causing me to bump into him. "Let me just explain..." "Has she marked you?" I mean you could almost see it in his eyes, she had marked him, and knowing the way life goes he's probably even mated with her. "Actually... Don't even answer that." I aggressively picked my bag up off of the floor and stormed off down the hall. "Dylan, just listen to me, Erin was right, it's so hard to resist your soulmate, and Arya is actually ok once you get to know her." I just kept walking, he caught up to me walking beside me but it didn't matter, I completely ignored everything and everyone. 'I'm so not in the mood today' getting into class was good though, I said hello to Mr Foley and took my usual seat. Nick sighed then took his bag off ready to sit next to me, but I snapped before he had the chance. "Traitors and mated idiots sit on that side of the room." I didn't look him in the eye as I pointed to a seat right at the front of the classroom on the opposite side. His eyes widened as he turned his attention back to me. "You can't be serious Dylan." I gave him a blank look before grabbing my book out of my backpack, I placed it on the desk then began to write the date on the top line. "I've sat in this seat for as long as I can remember." I ignored him, his voice sounded sad and shocked. "Dylan? Wait! What is that?!" Before I could react Nick had grabbed hold of my branded arm and turned it to see the letters. "Oh my God! What happened?" I snatched my arm away from him and shrugged as I continued to write in my book before grabbing my water bottle out of my bag. "The principal happened, it was my punishment for speaking out against Adrian and Arya. I wear it with pride." He just held a complete look of disbelief. "You spoke out against them?" I shrugged, what did he think I'd do. "It's no secret that I despise this stvpid new world and the mutts that control it. You were my friend, I wasn't going to let them just take you without saying something, although that is exactly what you seem to have done. Enjoy the view from your new seat!" "Don't be like that, Dylan, I'm your best friend, I'm sorry about your arm, but..." my eyes rolled inside my head at my friends words. "Anything with the word 'but' in, isn't an apology, it's a rationalization." I took a drink of water from my bottle and kept my eyes facing forward, ignoring his every attempt to try and talk to me. "Dylan?.. Dylan?... Do you know what? Erin is right, if you push us all away you won't have any friends left." He huffed before walking over to the empty seat and sitting down, I could feel him glancing up at me every now and again but I didn't respond. "Good morning class, please settle down." He looked at me then at Nick and frowned, we've never sat apart, we were friends before the new world even began. I just shook my head telling him to forget it. "So... as you know the king will be arriving in a short while, but until then lessons will go on as normal." Its funny seeing teachers in the same uniform your wearing, mr Foley and his wife are the coolest. Human teachers and doctors only have slightly more respect than we do. Because of Mr Foley's status him and his wife have better access to food and drink, Mrs Foley is cool, sometimes she even makes sure mr Foley brings some in for me. Ya know, coz I'm their favorite student. It's not in a weird way, it's just they were friends of the family before the new wold took effect. Mr Foley and my dad were buddies from high school, so it goes without sayin really. "All the mated humans will be at the front of each years line again, after that you will all be placed in status, Nick, as your mated to Alpha Arya, you'll be at the front of your line. Dylan as you have been branded..." his voice trailed off as he looked at me. "Yeah yeah, I'll be at the back of the line behind everyone. I get it." I huffed, moving my sight towards the window once more. "I am sorry." I turned to face Mr Foley again, he looked genuinely upset and that look of pity wasn't something I wanted to see. I gave him a clipped nod then turned away again. "Anyway, on to the subject matter, 'Of Mice and Men, page 64, Nick why don't you start us off with the reading."

"Of course sir." Nick began reading the book but I switched off, today is going to be a long day. After almost an hour and a half of reading comprehension, the bell chimed signaling lunch. I shot up and out of the classroom before anyone could say anything. Today, I was avoiding drama like the plague.

I wandered the corridors straight to the lunch hall. All the people I would normally hang out with we're all mated so I grabbed my lunch quickly, and sat down at the end of the human table. Let me lay the lunch hall out for you. On one side of the room you have two long rows of tables, with simple benches that make it look like prison, on the other side of the room you have multiple round tables with fancy chairs. Yup you get it. The humans sit at the prison tables and the wolves and traitors sit on the fancy tables, they get fancy food, fancy drink and most importantly they get pudding. what I would give to have some pudding. "Dylan can we just talk?" Nick quickly took the spot next to me as he set his lunch tray down. I looked at his food which had been placed on a ceramic, circular white plate. God that looked good. I sighed knowing he was going to talk anyway. "Fine, you have two minutes." I used my fork to take a bit of pasta off his plate and shoved it into my mouth. God that was good. "After I left school, I was taken to the pack house with Arya, and I really got to know her. It took a few days for me to finally accept being with her, but ever since life has been ok, and the sax... well that's a whole other story." Eww, I didn't need that mental image in my head. "I'm glad your happy." I stated before deciding I had no appetite. His face held shock before he sighed in relief. "That means a lot Dylan, I mean you know that your opinion matters to me." I cut him off before he could say anything else. "I said I was glad your happy. I didn't say I approved of what you've done. You've basically turned into one of THEM, I can't ever forgive you for that." He looked hurt, but I couldn't care less about his feelings. He placed his hand gently on my arm and went to open his mouth when a growl sounded out. All heads whipped to where it came from, Arya was stood holding a glass of soda and a plate, she was looking right at me and Nick and I would totally be dead if looks could kil. Nick quickly retracted his hand, his whole face fell and you could see sorrow flood his irises. "You sit with me now, get away from that, that... scum!" Wow, Nick was such a lucky guy. NOT. "You heard her. Get away from me, go sit with your new friends. I'm happy for you, and I understand where your coming from, but don't come up to me again and pretend you didn't betray your own kind. Don't pretend you didn't betray me." I shoved a little bit of food into my mouth before standing up and walking out of the cafeteria, leaving my tray on the table. I was walking through the hallway to the classroom, you see I decided to spend lunch with Mr Foley in his room, when I happened to hear voices in the corridor. "Is it wise for her to actually be present when the king arrives? Surely she could be placed in the dungeons, it might actually teach her some respect?" My principal was speaking to the alpha of our district, huh, if I stayed and listened do you think they'd notice, maybe they could smell me?! "Everyone is to be present, if the Riley girl does one thing out of line she will be dealt with severely, child or not. That girl has been a blight to the district since day one, she's dangerous, if she puts one hair out of place I will personally break her into submission." Oh shet, they were talking about me specifically, and they mentioned the dungeon, that's not been used in months. Normally I would have listened in more but something about the entire situation didn't sit right with me, all of a sudden, I was on edge, and simply wasn't interested in the slightest in hearing how my misery was to be enhanced. I backed up slightly before turning around and bumping head first into one of the hottest man I had ever seen. I lost my balance immediately and fell straight on to the floor letting out a small grumble in the process. His eyebrows knitted together quickly and his breath hitched in his throat as he looked upon my fallen state and gasped. "Mate!" He whispered, his eyes fixated on mine. Now, I had seen and heard that many times to know what that means, I gasped before taking a step back. 'No, no, no, no, no. This can not be happening.' He growled slightly before stepping towards me. Oh Shet!

this is my first reddit post ever so sorry if i’m doing this wrong. i only use this app to find people with similar problems, anyway.
i’m a 19 (almost 20) y/o F, i weigh 106 and im 5’1.
i like to start off by saying i have anxiety (mainly health anxiety) and tachycardia (due to anxiety probably) so this could just be a misunderstanding.
but as of now i feel bloated, like a balloon. i feel like i need to burp but i cant. i feel like i cant take a full proper breath. my middle/upper back hurts, (my spine is slightly curved to the right so maybe thats why, but i think thats lower) under my left breast feels uncomfortable and my left arm near my armpit feels odd (basically lots of slight pressure) i have a weird sensation in my left arm and hand, kind of like a numbness but not at the same time. the left side of my face (cheek/jaw and ear area) feels weird and my throat feels like there’s a lot of mucus clogging it. everytime i lay down after awhile i feel like i get out of breath and my heart spikes up. i have a cheap heart watch on but it said it went up to about 113, (i constantly check my heart rate and blood oxygen.) as of now its in the mid 80s, but its going up still. anyway, i’ve been feeling very imbalanced lately, like the floor is moving, not standing on solid d ground. i’ve been feeling dizzy and very fake, like derealization. and it’s super scary considering i feel like i’m not in my head / body most of the time. maybe this is because my iron is mildly low (55) and i’ve been staying up until 7am and waking up at 4pm and haven’t been eating right, constantly have stomach pain. but in my mind all this stress, bad sleeping habits and and eating habits could lead to a heart attack. my episodes usually start at night when i want to go to sleep. it’s scary. i always have a feeling that once i fall asleep i wont wake up which keeps me up at night. i usually fall asleep once my boyfriend wakes up because i like the feeling of being monitored i guess, its comforting to know that someone is there just in case.
but are these signs of a possible cardiac arrest or heart attack or is it just anxiety ? i’m trying to avoid going to the ER since i went 11 times JUST in may and had multiple CT scans and x-rays done and everything seems to be fine (except my $2k hospital bill) my mom always told me growing up that stress can kill you and that information stresses me out more every time i’m stressed and lately i’ve been constantly stressed.

Amahahn was seated at an oval table, a velvety dark green cape with golden hems and patterns draped over his shoulders. Three bowls of Shamal stew were placed on the table, vegetables and fine cut pieces of meat floating in the simmering Kahnjari milk.
“Three bowls. Are we expecting company besides our own, Amahahn?” Emma raised a brow as she plucked the visor cap off her head. Amahahn’s response was a chuckle, low and dry.
“Oh, you must be terribly informed. I’m married to a daughter of one of the noble houses on Kouvajilo”
Emma clenched her jaw and fists, slipping into one of the chairs. She placed her cap on the table, glancing over her shoulder as a door opened.
A young woman with olive skin in a white dress stood in the door, hands clutched at her front. A golden belt sat tight around her slender waist, her sleeves large and loose on her arms.
“Laudjehne, love. Come dine with me and our guest” The Prince Regent motioned to the empty seat at his side.
The girl dipped her head, the white dress floating behind her as she moved. She glided to Amahahn's side, fingers tracing his shoulder as she seated herself.
"It's an honor for me to share the same table as you, Empress. I've read your grandfather's books quite actively"
Emma blinked at the sleek face talking to her.
"Oh, yes. My grandfather's books..." Emma mumbled, picking up the wooden paddle-shaped spoon. She lifted her eyes to met Laudjehne's gaze.
"I've just read 'On the Building of the State' and 'The Laws of Steel and Soil' Laudjehne said, stirring her Shamal. Amahahn scoffed with the ghost of a smirk spread across his lips. Laudjehne's rich blue eyes fell upon her husband, her thin throat bobbing.
Amahahn drew a finger along one of his pale cheeks, his vicious smile persisting. The Prince Regent cast his dark eyes on a steward concealed in the shadows of a corner, the man striding forwards with a clay bottle of sweet wine.
Emma nodded her thanks to the steward, plucking her cup from the table and stirred the orange liquid.
"There's something too that interests me about your grandfather, Your Majesty" Laudjehne said, swallowing a spoonful of the beige stew.
Emma hummed her approval of the inquiry as she drank, the sweet finish of the wine dancing over the taste buds on her tunge.
"It puzzles me greatly how your grandfather persistently denies Goudanja and Kouvajilo's request to be annexed into Simonistan. Why would an empire ever turn another state's request for be anexed into it?"
Emma lowered her spoon, swallowing down her rambling thoughts as well as a spoonful Shamal.
"The Constitution of Simonistan does not permit acts of imperialism. Even if the other party willing approves of annexation into Simonistan, we cannot legally carry out such a request within the boundaries of our legal code"
At that, the Prince Regent chuckled. Emma felt heat flare across her cheek, yet she jutted out her chin to disapprovve of Amahahn's taunt. Already, she knew what was to come.
But Amahahn never dared bring up the topic.
"Oh...that's lofty principles to stand by" Laudjehn murmured, batting her blue eyes. Emma sensed her confusion but chose not to clarify. After all, she could not not clarify her grandfather's mindset.
Perhaps, if only she hadn’t taken so much after him; safe for his openly revolutionary rethoric and lingering autocratic aura, she would have annexed the union of Goudanja and Kouvajilo in a heartbeat.
That very popular man who it pained Emma to know, still considered himself an unrighteous dictator, yet cheered her on as empress.
Her grandfatheer the abdicated emperor, who she honored by making him Speaker of Parliament just so he might keep an eye on and help her during Parliament sessions.
“You wish for your home world to be annexed by Simonistan, Laudjehne?” Emma asked, swallowing down a spoonful Shamal

My Blood Covenant Salvation Prayer
Heavenly Father, I come to You in the Name of Jesus Christ. I believe You love me and sent Your Son to remove the sin which separates me from You. Father, I repent of all sin in my life. Please forgive me and cleanse me by the blood of Jesus Christ. By faith, I receive Your forgiveness and cleansing in Jesus’ name. Your Word says I am brought near to You by the blood of Jesus Christ, through which I enter into blood covenant salvation relationship with You now. Lord Jesus, I invite You to come into my life, and I submit totally to You and to Your Word (John 14:23). I confess with my mouth that Jesus is Lord. I believe in my heart God raised Him from the dead. It is with my heart I believe and am justified, and it is with my mouth I confess and am saved (Rom.10:9-10). I ask You to be Lord of my spirit, my soul (mind, thoughts, will, intellect, and emotions), and my body (I Thess.5:23). You are faithful to complete the work You have begun in me (Phil 1:6). By faith, I confess sin shall no longer have dominion over me because your Holy Spirit lives in me. I confess I am saved. I am under covenant through Jesus Christ to receive the promises that are for me including salvation, deliverance, healing, renewal, and all God’s promises for His children. I renounce the authority of Satan or any authority other than Jesus Christ over all areas of my life. I renounce every stronghold or influence of the devil, including ungodly soul ties, masonic attachments, ungodly beliefs, bitter root judgments, all personal sin, and everything inherited through the generations. The Word tells me I have a heavenly Father, and I now inherit only from Him. Lord, empower me to live for You. Release the Holy Spirit within me, that He may convict me of sin. I have access to the power of the Holy Spirit and the right to every spiritual gift (1 Cor. 12:4-11). Help me walk daily in the fullness of the Spirit filled life. I open my heart and ask You to fill me now with Your Holy Spirit. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Prayer to receive the baptism in the Holy Spirit
Heavenly Father, I come to You in the Name of Jesus, Your Son, Who has saved me. I repent of my sins and ask You to wash me clean by the Blood of Jesus. Jesus said, “And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper (Comforter, Advocate, Intercessor—Counselor, Strengthener, Standby), to be with you forever—the Spirit of Truth, whom the world cannot receive [and take to its heart] because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He (the Holy Spirit) remains with you continually and will be in you.” John 14:16 (AMP) In Mark 1:8, John the Baptist promised that while he baptized with water, You would baptize with the Holy Spirit and fire. So, Lord, I ask You to baptize me with Your Holy Spirit and fire. I am thankful as I ask for your empowerment and fire, it will refine me into who you have called and created me to be. I know You indwelled me at my salvation (John 20:22; Romans 8:9). Now, I ask You to fill me to overflowing with Your Presence, Your power, and Your joy. You promised in Acts 1:5-8 that Your disciples would receive power and ability when the Holy Spirit would come upon us. You promised to give us power to be Your witnesses even to the ends of the earth. This wonderful promise was fulfilled at the Feast of Pentecost in Jerusalem, as described in Acts 2. I pray the Holy Spirit come upon me now. I yield myself to You. I pray you breathe on me a breath of refreshment and empowerment. I receive by faith the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I welcome you, Holy Spirit, in the Name of Jesus. Thank You for empowering me for Your service. Fill me with boldness and courage to speak Your Word with power. I receive this wonderful empowerment by faith. As promised in John 14:26, send me the Holy Spirit, the Advocate, to teach me all things and remind me of everything You teach in Your Word. I desire spiritual gifts according to Your Word and ask You to grant me Your spiritual giftings according to Your will for my life. I joyfully accept Your gifts for me, in Jesus’ Name.
Prayer to Break Generational Curses and Sins of the Bloodlines:
Dear Heavenly Father: Thank you that the blood of Jesus is able to take away all sin. I believe this and receive it now in Jesus’ name. I pray forgiveness for the sins of my father, of that bloodline for all generations back, and I ask You to wash me clean now, by the blood of the Lamb. I pray forgiveness for the sins of my mother, of that bloodline for all generations back, and I ask You to wash me clean now, by the blood of the Lamb. I receive Your forgiveness and believe that by Your blood I am cleansed from the sins of all my generational bloodlines. I take the authority I have in my blood covenant with Jesus Christ, and I break all generational curses on my father's side all generations back, broken now, by the blood of the Lamb. I take this same authority and break all generational curses on my mother's side, all generations back, broken now, by the blood of the Lamb. With this same authority I have under the blood covenant of salvation in Jesus, I break any spoken curses on my family bloodline. I break the power of all seals of silence and all vows of secrecy. I take the same authority in the name and the blood of Jesus, and I break all covenants and contracts to satan including blood covenant contracts. I pray forgiveness for the sins of my family line of all those things that happened in darkness, such as any attachment to slavery or any kind of persecution or mistreatment or abuse of any people groups or individuals, and I pray blessings on all descendants of the persecuted groups or individuals. I pray forgiveness for the sin of all idolatries attached to the American Indian bloodline and break all related curses. I break any attachments to family superstitions and idolatries, ungodly beliefs, wives tales, luck charms, and rhyme curses in Jesus’ name. Thank you, Jesus, that Your word says, "Cursed is the one who hangs on the tree." You took our curses, and You took our sins, so that we can have life more abundantly, and we praise you for it. I receive by faith now all generational sins and all generational curses are broken by the blood of the Lamb, in Jesus’ Name. Amen.
Prayer to Break Ungodly Soul Ties
Father, in the name of Jesus, I submit my soul, my desires, my will, and my emotions to the Holy Spirit and Your Word. I confess as sin all of my sexual relationships before marriage and any sexual relationships outside of marriage. I confess as sin all ungodly relationships involving any part of me, whether spirit, soul, or body. Father, I thank You for giving me the keys of Your kingdom and the keys of spiritual authority. What I bind is bound, and what I loose is loosed (Matthew 16:19). I ask You to loosen from me all soul ties to past sexual partners and ungodly relationships in Jesus' name. Please uproot all tentacles of sexual bondage, emotional longings, dependencies, vain imaginations, enslaving thoughts, and thought patterns. I bind, renounce, and resist any evil spirits that have been reinforced through those soul ties or may have been transferred to me through ungodly associations or promiscuity. I also repent of the sin of the idolatry attached to my pursuit of perversion. Jeremiah 2:20-25 says that my Heavenly Father's perception of this perversion that I have been pursuing is that I will not serve him, and I love foreign gods, and I must go after them. Therefore, I repent of the sin of this idolatry, and I apply the blood of Jesus to it now. I submit to the Lord Jesus Christ and to His Word that tells me that I must forgive so that I will be forgiven. I repent of the sin of unforgiveness and judgment toward the people who have violated me sexually due to incest, molestation, or rape. I choose to forgive and bless them, and I break any soul tie attachments to these people in Jesus' name. Please cleanse my soul with Your blood, renew my mind, and help me to forget all illicit unions so that I am free to give myself, body, soul, and spirit, totally to You. Father, I receive Your forgiveness for all past sins of ungodly soul ties and unrighteous sexual activity. I believe that by Your grace, I am forgiven. Thank You for remembering my sins no more and for cleansing me from all unrighteousness. I commit myself totally to You. By Your grace, please keep me holy in my spirit, soul, and body, as I choose to renew my mind in Christ (Romans 12:1-2). In the Name of Jesus, I pray. Amen.
Prayer for Release of Bitter Root Judgment and Expectancy
Dear Heavenly Father: In the Name of Jesus, I repent for the sin of judging Your creation. I have judged and condemned others, although I am not a righteous judge and have no right to judge anyone. Jesus committed no sin, and was righteous, but He judged no one. Jesus entrusted Himself to You, the One who judges righteously. I now entrust myself to You. Please forgive me for this sin of judging and condemning others. I now bless those who I have judged. I bless those I have accused. I bless those who hate me and have cursed or abused me. I break the power of the spiritual law of sowing and reaping. I forgive, release, and bless them. I ask You to bless them and give them what they need. With this change in me comes a new expectation of reaping blessings, as opposed to reaping curses. When I “sow” differently, I will “reap” differently. I now intend to sow blessings into my life by blessing those people who have despitefully used me, in Jesus’s Name. Thank You, Lord, for forgiving me and helping me to forgive others. I ask these things in the Name of Jesus Christ. SCRIPTURES Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. Gal. 6:7 Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Matt. 7:1-2 See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. Heb. 12:15 Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, so that you may live long and that it may go well with you in the land the Lord your God is giving you. Deut. 5:16 Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Luke 6:37-38 You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things. Romans 2:1 This is what the Lord says-the Holy One of Israel, and its Maker: Concerning things to come, do you question me about my children, or give me orders about the work of my hands? Isaiah 45:11
Prayer of repentance of personal sin
Dear Heavenly Father, in the Name of Jesus Christ, I repent of all personal sin in my life. I ask You to forgive me and cleanse me. Some areas of sin I know; other areas of sin I do not recognize. But Your Word promises You are faithful and just to forgive all our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. I ask You to reveal all areas of personal sin, known and unknown, so I may more deeply repent. Your sheep hear Your voice. You will speak to my heart and mind, and I will hear You. If there are areas in which I am perishing for a lack of knowledge, I ask You to reveal Your truth to me. In Jesus’ Name, I will not reject Your truth. I specifically repent of anger, pride, perversion, idolatry, addiction, greed, fear, control, manipulation, judgment, accusation, gossip (here insert area of specific sin or sins, such as fear of lack, fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of success, etc.) Convict me of my sin, O God, so I may see my sin and repent to the depths of my soul. There is no righteousness in me on my own, but I am made righteous by the Blood of Jesus. Your Word promises that as we repent, we step into the righteousness of Jesus Christ. Your mercy is great toward me, and You will freely pardon. As far as the east is from the west, so far have You removed my transgressions from me. By Your Holy Spirit, empower me to overcome personal sin in my life. I confess I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. The prayer of a righteous person will avail much. Show me Your ways, that I may know You more and walk in Your ways all the days of my life, in Jesus’ Name.
Prayer to Release and Remove Ungodly Thought Processes, Mindsets, Devices, Defense Mechanisms, and Wrong or Unbiblical Reactions
Heavenly Father, in the Name of Jesus Christ, I _____________ ask You to forgive me for the sin of failing to cast my cares upon You because I did not know how to cast my cares upon You. There have been times in my life when I suffered from a lack of knowledge of knowing how to handle life's situations, difficulties, decisions, traumas, and not casting my cares upon Jesus as Your Word says to do. I confess I have used ungodly thought processes, mindsets, devices, defense mechanisms, and wrong or unbiblical reactions. I confess that I sought to handle and control my own problems in my own ways. I devised methods and systems for my self-preservation. Now, I choose to ask You, Lord, to gather and remove the devices I have created and used to get through life's difficult circumstances. I repent for the control I used in creating these devices instead of trusting in You. I release all control, anger, revenge, unforgiveness, and judgments, and all altered states of mind into which I entered to handle trauma in my life. I relinquish my self-preservation, and I trust You for my life and choices. I release to You all trauma, known and unknown. I bind and break the power of all soul tie attachments, longings, emotional bondage, enslaving thought patterns, and dependencies in the name of Jesus Christ. I now purpose in my heart not to reenter these altered states of mind, devices, and mindsets that I have become accustomed to using. I pray in the name of Jesus that You give me the renewal of mind to recognize these devices when they reappear due to life's circumstances. I release to You all disappointment, bitterness, and resentment about my past. I choose to renew my mind through the ongoing study of Your Word. I choose Your truth instead of altered states of mind that have caused me to revisit painful feelings or paralyze and distort my response to abuse or other behavior patterns toward me. So, I speak to all altered states of mind, ungodly thought processes, mindsets, defense mechanisms, devices, and conditioned reactions. I command all such devices to align themselves with the Word of God and release their power over me, my mind, my emotions, my personality, and align with my will in the name of Jesus Christ. I desire as the head and not the tail (Deut. 28:13) to have Jesus Christ and Your Holy Spirit come into me and restore my soul. I forgive, release, and bless everyone who has hurt, abused, or misled me. I repent and ask forgiveness for the sin of carrying any unforgiveness or judgment toward these people. I ask You to bless them and give them what they need. Please bring me into a place where I am fully restored and made whole in spirit, soul, and body. I ask You to renew my mind so that I will not return to these old ways of thinking. I thank You for teaching me to take captive every thought to make it obedient to Jesus Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5). I ask You to give me the renewed ability to maintain this fresh way of thinking for my new godly lifestyle. According to James 1, I can ask You, Lord, for wisdom, and You will give generously to all without finding fault. I ask that You give me the wisdom to maintain godly thought processes in this new season of my life and not return to the old, ungodly thought processes. I desire that all of me be able to worship You in spirit and truth (John 4:23-24). I desire to worship You with a sound mind, undivided heart, and clarity. I thank You and ask these things in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
PRAYER TO BREAK WORD CURSES
Dear Heavenly Father, in the Name of Jesus, I take the authority I have received through my blood covenant of salvation by accepting Jesus as my Lord and Savior. I bind and break the power of all spells, curses, and incantations spoken over my life from any source, including my family, church relationships, work relationships, friends, enemies, known demonic sources, strategies of the enemy using any sources, and all word curses from known or unknown sources. I break the power of these curses and declare their functions null and void. I speak the mighty Name of Jesus Christ over these evil words. The Name of Jesus Christ is above every name. His Word is above every word. His power is above every other power or principality. I pray His Word over anyone who has knowingly or unknowingly cursed or abused me. And I pray, heavenly Father, that you bless them and give them what they need, in Jesus’ Name. I thank You, Lord, that You have the ability to hear the curse and turn it into a blessing. Amen.
PRAYER TO BREAK TERRITORIAL STRONGHOLDS ESPECIALLY GOOD FOR MISSIONARIES For Missionaries traveling and entering territorial strongholds in countries such as China, India, the Middle East, or Africa, especially if entering mausoleums, temples, shrines, or other places of heathen worship. Cover yourself with a prayer such as the following:
Heavenly Father, in the Name of Jesus Christ, I take the authority I have received through my blood covenant of salvation by accepting Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. I thank You for teaching us our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms (Ephesians 6:12). I bind and break the power of any influence of territorial strongholds that may attempt to attach themselves to me as I embark on a journey to serve the Most High God. I bind and break the power of any spell, curse, or incantation from the spiritual realm empowered by the idolatrous and vain worship of Buddha, Hindu gods, Krishna, Allah, Mohammed, local deities, ancestor worship, necromancy, animism, voodoo, witchcraft, idols made with hands, or other false gods. I declare the power of all such forces aligned against me to be null & void. I bind and break the power of any influence of territorial strongholds that have become attached to me due to my service in ministry. I bind and break the power of any influence of territorial strongholds over the areas in which I travel, in which I serve in ministry, and in which I reside. From Satan to the Prince of Persia to the least of the territorial spirits, I speak the mighty name of Jesus Christ over them. I bind and break the power and influence of these territorial strongholds, and call their function null and void, in the name of Jesus Christ. I thank You that he who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty (Psalm 91). The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe (Proverbs 18:10). And a curse without cause will not come to rest on me (Proverbs 26:2). I thank You that no weapon formed against me will prosper, and I will refute every tongue that accuses me. I thank You this is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and this is our vindication from You (Isaiah 54:17). Thank you, Jesus, for the power of Your name.
Prayer of Repentance for Prior Involvement in any Other Religion or Spiritual Practice or Teaching
Heavenly Father, in the Name of Jesus Christ, I come before You. I praise You for making a way for the forgiveness of my sins. I acknowledge that Your Word requires that I repent and ask forgiveness for my sins, in Jesus’ Name. I acknowledge Jesus Christ is the Lamb of God, slain for the remission of my sins and the sins of the world. I acknowledge Jesus Christ is the Son of the Living God. I believe He was born of a virgin, lived a sinless life, suffered and died on the cross, was buried, and rose again. He ascended into heaven, where He sits by His Father. Under my Blood Covenant of Salvation, through the acceptance of Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, I repent of the sin of believing any teaching that does not line up with the Holy Bible, the Word of God. The Scriptures say Jesus Christ became the Word of God (John 1:14; Revelation 19:13). Therefore, I repent of believing anti-christ teachings and entertaining anti-christ and unbiblical thoughts. With the authority I have in my Blood Covenant of Salvation with Jesus Christ, I break the power of all spoken or written oaths, curses, vows, decrees, chants, blood sacrifices, and rituals. I repent of the sin of receiving or aligning with these anti-christ oaths, curses, vows, or decrees. I repent of the sin of participating in any anti-christ chants, blood sacrifices, or rituals of any description. I repent of the sin of receiving any anti-christ attachments to my mind, intellect, heart, feelings, and emotions. I repent of the sin of receiving and agreeing with unbiblical principles, teachings, and spiritual deceptions. I acknowledge these have caused attacks on my physical body, mental wellbeing, relationships, and finances. I bind and break the power of all of these ungodly attachments in the mighty Name of Jesus. The Word tells me I am to forgive and bless those who persecute or despitefully use me, as Jesus forgave and blessed. (I Peter 2:21-23; Matthew 5:44). I repent of the sins of anger, unforgiveness, and judgment toward anyone who has mislead or misguided me in any way, in the Name and Blood of Jesus Christ. I pray that you bless them and open their eyes to your truth. Thank You, Heavenly Father, that through my acceptance of Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, and my acknowledgement that He is the only Way to You, I become an heir to the promises of Abraham (Galatians 3:29). I stand in faith and believe that all Your promises are Yes and Amen, through Jesus Christ (II Corinthians 1:20). Amen.
PRAYER FOR MILITARY (Good for anyone)
Heavenly Father, in the Name of Jesus Christ, I pray in the authority I have received through my blood covenant of salvation by accepting Jesus Christ as my Lord & Savior. Lord, I ask for Your mercy & protection as I travel in obedience to orders during my service in the Military. I acknowledge & repent of my sins. I ask You to forgive me & wash away my sin by the shed Blood of Jesus. Your Word says as I confess & repent of my sins, You are faithful & just to forgive me & purify me from all unrighteousness (I John 1:9). This causes my prayers to be righteous, powerful, & effective (James 5:16). I bind & break the power of every influence of territorial strongholds that have attached or seek to attach themselves to me as I serve in the Military. I bind & break the power of every influence & assignment from territorial strongholds & other demonic powers as I travel from place to place during training & tours of duty, & embark on every change of assignment & change of residence. I call the function of each of these territorial strongholds & demonic powers to be null & void. In the Name of Jesus, I bind & break the power of the devil, who was a murderer from the beginning and is a liar and the father of lies (John 8:44). I bind & break the power of every such assignment of the devil that would cause or seek to cause physical injury, mental torment, or death to me. I bind & break every assignment of calamity, destruction, sudden death, & suicide by any person. I bind every lying tongue that would persuade a person to commit suicide. I call the function of every such demonic assignment null & void, in the mighty Name of Jesus. I bind & break the power of the enemy to steal the Lord’s call on my life or rob me of the blessings of His covenant promises, including health & a full life span (Exodus 23:25-26). Jesus stated, “The thief comes only to steal & kill & destroy; I have come that they may have life, & have it to the full.” (John 10:10). Thank You, Jesus, for health and a full life span. LORD, (you) are a shield around me, my glory, the One who lifts my head high. I call out to the LORD, & he answers me from his holy mountain. I lie down & sleep; I wake again, because the LORD sustains me. I will not fear though tens of thousands assail me on every side. Arise, LORD! Deliver me, my God! Strike all my enemies on the jaw; break the teeth of the wicked. From the LORD comes deliverance. May your blessing be on your people. (Psalm 3). Lord, You know when I sit & when I rise; You discern my going out & my lying down; You are familiar with all my ways (Psalm 139:2-3). You will never leave or forsake me. (Deut.31:6; Hebrews 13:5) Lord, thank you for teaching us to put on the full armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-18). I stand strong in the Lord & Your mighty power. I put on the full armor of God, so I can take my stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggles are not against flesh & blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world & against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore I put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, I may be able to stand my ground, & after I have done everything, to stand. I stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around my waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, & with my feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, I take up the shield of faith, with which I can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. I take the helmet of salvation & the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And I pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers & requests. With this in mind, I am alert & always keep on praying for all of Your people. Thank You, Lord, for teaching me to pray & trust You for protection for my body, soul & spirit (1Thess.5:23). I thank You that no weapon formed against me will prosper (Isaiah 54:17). In the mighty Name of Jesus Christ, I bind & break the power of every spell, curse, blasphemy, & incantation from the spiritual realm empowered by the idolatrous & vain worship of Allah, Mohammed, Buddha, any Hindu deities, local deities on any continent, ancestor worship, necromancy, animism, voodoo, witchcraft, idols made with hands, or any other false gods. Further, I declare the power of all such spiritual forces aligned against me to be null & void. I declare I will dwell in the shelter of the most High & rest in the shadow of the Almighty. In the mighty Name of Jesus, I declare I will not fear for the terror by night, the arrow that flies by day, the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. I will say, “The Lord is my refuge,” and I will make the Most High my dwelling, & no harm will overtake me, no disaster will come near my tent (Psalm 91:1-10). I declare null & void the assignment of post-traumatic stress disorder against me & all military personnel. I declare the threefold cord of feaanxiety & trauma & torment will not destroy us. I bind & break the power of all traumatic & stressful experiences of warfare. In the mighty Name of Jesus, the Prince of Peace, I speak His peace, “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts & your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:7). Lord, I ask You for the continuing ability to cast my daily cares upon You, as You direct me to do: “casting all your cares [all your anxieties, all your worries, & all your concerns, once & for all] on Him, for He cares about you [with deepest affection, & watches over you very carefully]” I Peter 5:7 (Amplified). In the Name of Jesus, I declare these attacks will not destroy or harm my body, emotions, mind, or will. The enemy’s schemes for evil, terror, & ongoing torment in my life, I declare to be impotent before the Lord God Almighty in Heaven above. Lord, I stand on Your Word, which promises “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and love, and a sound mind.” (2 Timothy 1:7 KJV). I ask these things in the Name of my Savior, Jesus of Nazareth, the Christ, the Messiah of Israel.
Prayer to break Masonic Curses and Attachments: https://boblucyministries.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/01/Prayer-to-Break-Masonic-Curses-and-Attachments-2024.pdf
Prayers courtesy of boblucyministries.org

Over the last year I've had really bad depression and anxiety. The worst physical symptom for me has been my head. The sensations. I don't know how to describe it. It's not a really bad headache as such but it feels just really weird all the time at the front of my head from the minute I wake up to going to sleep. It's like a dulled feeling, tight band but also feels like it's vibrating or something and then just numb or something. At times it feels like it could explode. It's the most horrible feelings. I could swear there is something really wrong with it. I'm getting an mri next week to make sure. Just wondering does anyone else experience this. Can your head be constantly affected like this. It just scares me and the thought that it will never go away. It's been like this nearly every day for over a year.

Chapter 1: Hope’s 16th Birthday
As the rays of the sun hits her eyes Hope Moonshine wakes up excited, she was waiting for this day for all her life
She jumps out of her bed and rushes to her mom's room excited and she accidentally flung the door open too fast making a loud cranking noise waking her mother, Queen Matilda up
"Oops didn't mean to wake you up" hope said awkwardly"Honey I know you are excited for your birthday but you need to be patient the sun has just risen everyone is still asleep" Matilda said tiredly, "please go back to sleep darling you will have a long day today and you will need the energy, your party wont be begin till noon"
"Ok mom, sorry for waking you up" said Hope as she was trying to close the door slowly enough that it doesn't crank but it still did "Not an issue dear", said Matilda
As the door closed Matilda took a deep breath and closed her eyes her emblem on her right shoulder a pink diamond glowed she opened her eyes and she made a finger gun with her right hand pointing at the hinges and a shiny pink light zaps comes out of her index and zaps the hinges, the beam turns into a hand and it open the door and then closes without making a cranking noise, "I should have done that a long time ago" said Matilda
She removes the blankets from her bed to reveal she is already clothed for a serious occasion, as she goes towards the mirror she is wearing a long cyan dress that trails all the way to her feed her top being smartly tight with short shoulder sleeves, she puts on long white gloves and glances over her diamond ring she lets out a small sigh and frown and puts it on, she trances over the mirror for a few seconds before snapping out of it, and she looks over to a miniature painting of her an her daughter when she was 6 she picks it up and smiles "I know you are eager dear you won't have to wait for long"
After Matilda ready's herself she open her window and conjures a light bird of the palm of her hand, the bird flew off to Hope's room where it sees her lying in her bed on her stomach, the bird soon returns to Matilda's room and land on her palm her eyes glows for a moment and the bird fizzes into a yellow cloud, "Well it looks like she actually listened not very common of her to do so, it means I can continue to do my plan unobstructed" she said with a smile.
Matilda leaves her room and walk across the hallway to the main hall then she claps her hand twice, and snap her finger, suddenly a figure jumps into the window it spins 180° and a muscular women stands up, she has a scar on her left cheek and short brown hair, she wore knight armour that cuts of at her shoulder emblem that looks like a dark grey shield.
"At your service my queen", she said with a salute
Matilda is startled for a moment, but then composes herself, "Sally there is no need for you to enter that way you can just wait for me at the hall entrance", she said.
"I was scouting the perimeter we have to make sure this place is safe and to make sure no one can harm the princess at her important day, I was up all night with my team searching every corner of the upper ring for any danger and-" Sally was abruptly cut off by Matilda.
"It was not your fault Sally, there is no need for you to prove yourself to me" Matilda said remorsefully, "You tried your best so you must eventually forgive yourself it wasn't anyone fault, it truly came from nowhere"
Sally's serious expression break into expression of regret as she shamefully looks at the ground
"Now is not time to punish ourselves over who we failed to protect but to make sure my daughter has a great birthday" Matilda said with determination
Sally's expressions of regret turned to a smile, "Yes my Queen, me and the royal guards have spent last few weeks clearing a safe path from the upper ring to the more presentable areas of the lower ring that ends at the great barrier" Sally says with a salute.
"Well I trust your judgement, you are now dismissed" said Matilda
Sally goes down the stairs of the central hall towards the doors "I won't mess up again" Sally said with determination
"Oh Houston" Matilda said while turning her head left and right, "where is he when I need him",
"I am right here your majesty" Houston whispered from behind, Matilda was startled and was annoyed on how everyone seems to sneak up on her, "Sorry for spooking you" said Houston as he polished his monocle "We are well prepared to begin celebration soon" he said as his hand pointed towards the empty hall.
Matilda stared at him, he then clapped his hands and an army of servants entered the hall setting up the chairs and tables, followed up by waiters quickly setting food on the table, and then 6 waiters came together to slowly lift the large 4 layered birthday cake with a milk white colour with chocolate cream on top of each layer, with "happy birthday Hope" spelled with strawberry topping on the side of each layer, with the glowing yellow number "16" candle at the top.
"As I was saying my Queen" Houston started "We just need to wait for the guests to arrive, I will let you know when you can call your daughter" Houston stops from a moment "Do you want anything else your majesty or am I dismissed?" he asked.
"You are dismissed Houston" said Matilda
Matilda walks up to Hope's room and slowly opens the door to find her laying in her bed
"One thousand one hundred and forty-two" Hope counted to herself, she paused and took a deep sigh, and tried to continue but then paused scratching her head "Um One-".
she was interrupted by her mother saying "Thousand one hundred and forty-three", "Unable to sleep dear?" She said with a smile, Hope gasped and she had the biggest smile in her face, her mother was a bit startled and asked "what is it you are smiling at?".
Hope pointed at her, jumped from her bed and as she was taking heavy breathes pointing at her mother clothes, "You don't sleep in this" she takes a deep breath and exclaims "which means I have got to get ready" and she runs to her closet to pick up something to wear.
Matilda takes a glance down at her clothes and rolls her eyes "so much for a surprise"
"I am ready mom" Hope said ecstatically, she was wearing a beautiful turquoise dress which complemented her hair colour styled in two plates with with joined with a pink band and wearing her favourite golden necklace,
"That was quick" her mother commented
As they enter the main hall a bunch of guests are seated drinking beverages and helping themselves to freshly baked foods, "Attention everybody, I would like you to welcome the birthday girl" said Houston, everyone stopped what they were doing and turned their heads towards the princess.
She gets a bit nervous and let out an awkward "hey guys", she didn't recognize any of them but she had to pretend to know all of them while hoping they don't ask her if she knows them, they all continue to stare as she and her mother get seated.
Houston lets out a forced cough to break the awkward silence, he says "and now Princess that you have come here you may blow the candles", the table the cake was on was carried towards Hope and her mother seated on there high chair, Hope tries to mask her excitement as she takes a deep breath and gently blow the candles, which fire off the cake and make a small explosion spelling out "Happy Birthday Princess!", Hope's eyes lit with joy.
Trumpets play and two royal servants come into the hall holding a gold plated chest decorated with diamonds, the chest is slowly opened and a blinding bright light shined from inside it, "Go ahead dear" said Matilda as her eyes pointed to the chest.
Hope goes down towards the chest and slowly lowers her hand inside of it and grabs what inside, as she removes her hand from the chest it reveals her to be holding the magic wand, it had a purple handle with a sparkly cyan diamond at its back end and a translucent turquoise sphere at it top decorated with a white glowing shape which resembled the combination of a two star into two different planes inside, and topped off with a small yellow crown at the top
Hope's shoulder emblem a pink heart with a tiny crown on top of both curves starts glowing, she raises the top of the wand at eye level, "ooh what's this" she says as she tries to stick her finger inside it to touch the spinning star
"HOPE DONT" shouted her mother, as soon as hope touched it burnt her finger and she let out a painful screech and fires a yellow glowing beam fires from the wand at some guest who were quick enough to duck, it hits a glowing orange decorative plant crushing it against the wall,
"hehe this could have been worse", Hope said awkwardly, the wreckage catches fire...
"FIRE" yells Sally, the guards that were standing by the walls quickly moved and shoved away all nearby guest as Sally goes and faces the fire here shoulder emblem glows and she fires yellow beam at it from her hands she then she clenches her fist and the beam turns into water extinguishing the fire and a yellow cloud evaporates from it, she quickly turn over to Hope and rushes over to her "ARE YOU OKAY PRINCESS" she exclaimed worryingly.
"I am fine it's just my finger is a little -" before she finishes her sentence Sally picks her up and running with her in her arms and runs up to the door and out of the Palace.
Queen Matilda is left with the guests and lets out an awkward chuckle and says "so who wants some drinks?", "Please help yourself to the finest wines in the whole kingdom" she said as a servant reveals a bunch of wine bottles in gold coating, the guests all rushed to get a sip
"I am telling you I am fine it's just a little scratch its rude for me to leave suddenl-" Hope was interrupted by Sally kicking the door open.
"PA-" Sally yelled before being interrupted by a "SHHHH", she was shushed by a woman with a white robe that cut offs at the shoulder, and a hand crafted necklace made of cotton around her neck, she had red hair tied into a bun and a green plus sign as her shoulder emblem.
"Seriously Sally how many times do I have to tell you to be quiet in here" said healer Pam with frustration she lets out a sigh and asks, "So what seems to be the problem?" Sally pulls out Hope and holds her at arms length right Infront of her Hope lets out a "Hi".
Pam gasps "Oh my princess sorry I didn't know you were coming, are you hurt?"
"No not at all it's ju-" Hope was interrupted yet again it seems like although she is becoming a grownup no one seems to want to listen to her
"She burned herself quickly check up on her" commanded Sally as she lowered Hope to her feet, Pam glanced at her up and down
"Where was she hurt", asked her confused. Hope sheepishly pointed to her left index finger it was a bit red which could be easily seen as it contrasted with her smooth white skin, but it was also accompanied by a yellow 'liquid', Pam conjured a white napkin to clean the site of the injury and singled out the injured finger from Hope's hand and put her hand on it and made into a fist and then she took a deep breath and closed her eyes her shoulder mark started having a green glow for a few seconds and then it suddenly went dim, she opened her hand to find the finger fully healed like it was never even scratched.
"Oh wow t-thanks" said Hope with a smile.
"Oh it's nothing" said pam, she took out her napkin it had some yellow glowing spots of what looks like fluid except its it didn't soak in but floated around it, "I see you can use magic now, what was your first spell" Pam said with excitement.
"I-i just shot this out of the wand" she said as she pointed at liquid on the napkin that started evaporating considerably, she then lowered her voice and talked faster "and it hit a plant and set it on fire" she was saying as she looked at the floor, Pam laughed and Hope was starting to blush.
"Oh don't worry dear we all mess up at the start, when I first started I accidentally broke a boy's arm" Pam said with a laugh.
"Is he okay now?" Hope asked with curiosity
"Well when I was your age healing wasn't what it is today they just put his arm in a cast and said if he was lucky his arm would be usable in three years", "I never was interested in healing like my mom but I wanted to fix my mistake so I studied and practiced for months to focus my healing and one day it just clicked, I got back to him and I was able to heal his arm and this happiness a patient feels when they are treated makes this all worth it" she let out a calm sigh and continued "It was not an easy journey but in just 8 years I was able to reach my peak"
"Eight years?" Hope said in disbelief
"Don't worry your path is way longer than mine my peak is at least four levels lower than you" Pam said with a grin
"It isn't that huge difference right?" Hope inquired hoping her journey wont be in the double digits because that's a very long time
Pam laughed and then said "Oh it way larger than it looks, but don't worry royals don't have a peak at least not one that one knows off" she put her hand on Hope's shoulder "Don't let the long road overwhelm you as long as you are better than yesterday you will be a great princess"
Hope smiled at her and said, "Thanks a lot Pam"
"So is everything alright with her, she stuck her finger into the wand are you sure there wont be any complications" asked Sally
"She will be alright she might have lost her finger if she went deeper and then It will actually a challenge to fix, but this is what pain reflexes are for, it a blessing in disguise", replied Pam
Sally clapped her hands and said "Well we got to go now we cant keep the guests waiting thanks for your help Pam"
Hope looked over to her and said "You should come over it's my birthday you can go change the setting", "No dear being a Healer is big commitment what if someone is in need of assistance and I am not here but I appreciate the gesture, maybe I could arrange my schedule to be there next time, go enjoy yourself".
"Pam the amputee is ready for his second regeneration session" a voice called.
"The what?" exclaimed Hope.
"Oh it's a bit graphic you really don't want to see it, I got to go now send your mother my regards" replied Pam as she ran over to a patient
Sally and Hope went to the door and left.
"You know I was really fine, it was just a scratch" Hope said as she looked up to Sally, "It's kind of rude to just leave the guests hanging I could have just sucked it up-"
Hope tried to continue when Sally muttered under her breath "I won't forgive myself".
"What was that?" asked Hope.
"Nothing, it's just you can never be so sure and no one was stupid enough to stick there finger in the wand I was just making sure but since it wasn't serious we don't need to worry" Sally said with an anxious fake smile, Hope sensed there was something off about her tone but she didn't want to push Sally into an uncomfortable spot so she left it at that
Sally and Hope make it back to the palace and Matilda rushes to her daughter "Oh dear are you ok"
She said as she gave her girl a hug, Everyone was staring and Hope got a bit embarrassed "yeah Mom I am ok" Hope said, Matilda stood up and was about to say something before Hope pre-emptively said, "I know I know it was pretty stupid from me to to do what I did, I know the wand is not a toy and I promise I will be more careful with it" she said while avoiding eye contact
Matilda smiled and said "Well I appreciate that you understand that you messed up but that not what I wanted to say" Hope made eye contact and Matilda continued "As princess and future queen we will have you visit the LOWER RING" Matilda took her daughter's hand "Sure its not the safest or best place in the kingdom but a hermit ruler is a bad ruler"
Hope got extremely excited over this as she always wanted to see the rest of the kingdom the Lower ring, the Outer ring but she was always told no because Sally's word "It's way to dangerous, you are not ready, you aren't old enough" or her mother's word "Is there something there that you cant find at home?, The place isn't very hygienic" but how bad could it be it was still under the rule of the Moonshines. Life in the Upper ring and the palace get boring after a while, why would she wants to stay put there when there a whole world to explore?
"The escorts are waiting for us outside those who want to go with us are welcome to go" Said Matilda looking at the guests with a forced smile almost knowing the reaction. All of them tried to mask there faces of disgust as if Matilda just asked them to bathe in mud or even worse she said that the food at the legendary "façade haut de gamme" was just an overpriced scam. They didn't look very impressed, Matilda coughed and asked "Well?".
One couple went towards the exit and when they got to Matilda the man said "We are truly flattered by your invite my queen but I am afraid we have something important to do" the man paused and scratched his head trying to think of an excuse Hope looked over him and asked
"What's more important to than a trip to see the rest of kingdom its not like we can always get to do it" with an ecstatic smile the woman who was scratching her head stopped as if she got an idea she went over looked to Hope with a stupid fake smile and said
"Well sweetie we forgot to sign up our son for school and registration will be closing today" she turned over to her husband and elbowed him in ribs and asked "Isn't that right honey?"
The man nodded in agreement and they walked out and they led out an audible sigh and when they were just outside of earshot the man told his wife "Moonshines huh? You would think after what happened a decade ago they would get the memo" the woman looked back at the Queen then waved and looked back at her husband and said
"She is weak if this happened to me I will make sure those pigs wish they weren't born".
Following into there footsteps and sensing an opening other guests decided to excuse themselves outside and at this point Matilda stopped resisting she knew some wouldn't want to go but she didn't think that many would go and she looked defeated Hope turned to her and said "Well mom we don't need those nose in the airers it's there loss anyways"
A woman walked up to them "She is right you know in-law" that woman was Hope's paternal aunt Mary, she had short blonde hair and brown eyes wearing a yellow dress for the occasion "The only reason any off these arrogant buffoons came here is societal expectations much like basically everything here" she said while rolling her eyes "and they all dipped the second they had the chance, come on lets go"
As they walked past the doors Sally was standing just outside the door scanning the setting with her eyes, her eyes wandered and locked with Mary "You should relax Sally no need for you to be so tense" she said with a smile she then changed her tone suddenly and said with a frown and a in a low voice that Hope and Matilda couldn't hear "Me and Matilda can protect ourselves and we aren't relying on you and my niece was under my protection since she was six, all you need to do is drive the horses and look menacing" and then she put her hand on her shoulder and smiled and said with an audible voice "So you can feel a lot more at ease dear", Sally tried hid her feeling of guilt with a fake smile "Let's go" said Mary joyfully
Everyone got on the horse driven chariot, just a classical chariot nothing magical about it, it's a very ineffective method of transport but one of the most relaxing ones
"HEEEEEY WAIT FOR ME" yelled a girl from as she was she surfing a purple cloud wearing a long sleeved purple sweater and blue pants as she got closer she tried to slow down by tilting her body backwards but she lost control and started flying at high speeds towards Hope
"EM SLOW DOWN" shouted Hope.
"I CANT BRACE FOR IMPACT" they both closed there eyes with their arms covering there eyes but just before contact she was caught effortlessly by Sally one hand and her cloud in the other she crushed the cloud in her fist into yellow mist that faded away and put the girl on her feet she then crossed her arms and looked down and barked
"Miss Emberlynn Springfield you should know how dangerous using magic without experience is, and you can't just rely on something you can't even responsibly use to make up for your own lack of punctuality"
Ember looked taken aback but she didn't want to look stupid so she snapped back with "I didn't know Hope is celebrating her birthday early in the morning, birthdays are a night activity".
Sally who was crossing her arms now raised her eyebrow and simply replied with,"Lies you were told everyday for the last week not my fault you can't seem to be able to be punctual friend's birthday, do you simply not care?".
Ember now looked embarrassed and now was rolling her finger around her dyed purple hair "M-M-My rooster didn't wake me up" she said with a smile while shrugging her shoulder as if she is asking question and the question was 'will Sally let the lecture go'.
"This doesn't matter now anyways it's that Ems is here" interjected Hope with excitement as she put her arm around Ember's shoulder "We shouldn't be wasting time let's go" she said as she punched her hand up in the sky.
Matilda, Hope, Ember and Mary entered the Chariot while Sally rode one of the two horses moving it while the other was being moved by an over-armoured and visibly nervous man.
"Calm down Edmund its just a short trip by a defined path we will be in an out in an hour or two" commanded Sally looking at Edmund clearly getting tired of his lack of confidence.
"I am trying but its such a big deal, escorting not one not two but three royals into the lower ring, I am not sure if I can do this, If I mess up-- I am too young for the consequences" he said clearly on the edge of panic
Sally slapped her hands on his cheeks "Edmund calm down you can do this I know you can" she said, Edmund seemed to calm down a bit "The whole path is being heavily guarded you and me are the last line of an extremely deep wall of defences we are most likely just going to be there for company" she looked back at the cart and said "and besides it's not like the royals can't protect themselves, they are much stronger than us after all"
"That's what they said about fre-" Edmund mumbled before putting his hand on his mouth mid sentence, Sally expression changed to that of anger.
"What did you just say?" she barked.
Edmund realising his mess up and started shaking "Um- I was talking about ---- the nice weather we are having" he said trying to pretend that this wasn't the stupidest attempt at backtracking, before Sally was going to give him a piece of her mind Mary stuck her head out and said in annoyed tone
"Hey I am not getting any younger here", Sally and Edmund looked forwards and shook the horse reins and they got moving forward
As they got to the edges of the Upper ring they reached translucent yellow barrier "We are reaching the barrier you might feel a tickle" proclaimed Sally.
As the horse crossed the barrier the barrier walls phased through the cart and it phased through Mary and Matilda there shoulder emblems glowed a four pointed star and a diamond respectfully in a yellow hue when it got to Hope and Ember the cart got to a sudden halt and they were thrown forwards Hope fell on her mother while Ember face was slapped into the barrier which was at this point halfway through the cart.
Sally opened the door "Everyone ok" she took one look at Ember and let out an annoyed sigh she dragged her hand out of the cart and asked while trying to hide her frustration "Show me your emblem"
Ember scoffed and tried to tuck back her long sleeves but she couldn't get back enough and said while crossing her arms "I can't and I am not removing my shirt".
Sally wasn't having any of it and from tip of her index made a sharp grey magic beam, she flattened Ember's sleeve and made a small cut in her right shoulder showing a yellow star rotated slightly to the left, after the cut yellow gas evaporated from it "And this is why emblems aren't covered it's common knowledge Springfield" said Sally annoyed.
"My favourite shirt! This was very unnecessary" whined Ember and before she could say anything Sally went back to her horse leaving her alone she scoffed and went back to the cart and sat next to Hope crossing her arms.
"You okay there", asked Hope concerned.
"Yeah I am fine just another lecture", said ember looking at the windows
As Hope looked out the window the lower ring didn't seem so different from home, people dressed and walked smartly roads were clean but something was off she couldn't help but notice everyone wore long sleeves even though it was a summer and it's not proper etiquette and that's something else it was surprisingly hot, She took her head out through the windows "Hello stranger" she greeted a man walking nearby he took one solid look at her and looked towards her mother and Sally who was frowning and her hands free with her emblem glowing, he didn't say anything and turned back and proceeded to speed walk away in a few seconds he ditched the subtlety and ran away, Hope was pretty disappointed and got her head into the cart
"What did I do wrong?", Hope asked.
"Girl it's either because you were too friendly it felt fake" said Ember, Hope looked down "Or they were made to feel unwelcome by misses buzzkill in the driving seat" she remarked
A loud sound of crashing wooden boxes was heard and cart went to a halt
"What was that" commented Mary
"Something that isn't boring" Hope said with excitement before leaving the cart.
"Make sure all of them stay put in the cart I will be gone for a short while" said Sally to Edmund before running to the source of the sound Hope tried to follow her but was body blocked by Edmund with his arms crossed
"Sorry I can't let you go princess, Superior's orders", he glanced to the left of him to seeing Ember touching a fancy table Infront of a café just for it to poof into a yellow cloud,
"Ow splinters" she cried, the yellow cloud fizzled reveal a wooden table barely clinging to its shape with a bunch of makeshift wooden fixes that don't even match in colour
Edmund looked like he just saw a ghost and ran towards Ember who was now transforming outdoor expensive furniture into splinter traps
"Stop touching it" said Edmund before shooting out a grey magical hands towards her subduing her, "What's your deal" he scolded annoyed.
"No what's this place deal why is everything here so fake?" snapped Ember "You hearing this Hope this place is fa-" she then stopped and asked "Aye were is Hope?"
Edmund let her go and pulled on his hair "Oh no no no no no no no" he cried
"Is everything alright where is my daughter?" asked Matilda concerned, Edmund didn't know what to say but before he could make up an explanation Mary interjected
"Oh don't worry Mati she will be ok she is probably with Sally and besides she still has this necklace I gave her so I am sure she will be just fine" Mary said with her hand on Matilda's shoulder "and we can go have some tea and chit-chat while we wait I heard that Gilbert's tea shop has actually potable tea" she suggested Matilda sighed and decided to go with what Mary said and walked towards the shop. "What about me?" asked Ember, Edmund turned towards her with anger and barked "You are staying right here!".
"Sally where are you?" called Hope as she was walking she saw a little girl wearing a cute pink dress and smooth brown hair walking alone Infront of her, she approached her and asked
"Hey do you happen to see a tall lady around here?" she tapped on her shoulder to get her attention and suddenly a cloud of yellow gas evaporated out of her Hope and the little girl coughed and as the smoke cleared the little girl was wearing a poorly knit patchwork of randoms scraps of fabric and her hair was covered in dirt she had a brown circle on the side of her shoulder, Hope froze in shock "I- I am so sorry, it was an accident" she apologised "I can go get you a new dress or--" the girl just looked at Hope her eyes glanced her wand which was in her right hand as well as her royal emblem and then she started hyperventilating and burst into tears.
Hope got on to her knees and she gently put her hands on the girl's shoulder "Calm down calm down, it's alright, It's not your fault but mine"
"P-P-pwease do-don hu-hur meeee" the girl sobbed.
"What hurt you? no no no no" Hope explained trying to figure out from where the girl got the idea
Hope hugged the girl "Here calm down see I am friendly" she soothed, the girl seemed to calm down a bit and she started sniffing
She let her go and asked "So what's your name?"
"R-R-Rosie" replied Rosie.
"Ok Rosie I am so sorry for ruining your dress, do you remember were you got it from?" she asked
"Ms Bea had guys gib it to us" Rosie said
"Misses Bea huh" she wondered out loud "Well can you tell me were misses Bea is"
"Sowwy I can't tell you misses moonnnn" Rosie was saying before she looked she wanted to cry again
"Please don't cry" Hope pleaded "You don't need to tell me where you live just wait" Hope passed her wand to her left hand and put her now free hand to her pocket and pulled out a purple wallet and she pulled out a golden note with 50 written on it she passed the note to Rosie and said "Here give this to misses Bea and tell her I am so sorry for destroying your dress also" Rosie grabbed the note and stared at it, Hope pulled some wrapped candy she got from the party "Her have some candy too" the girl put her the note in her pocket and grabbed the wrapped candy she struggled with it a bit and she then passed it back
"Open it please" Rosie asked
"Oh you can't? it's quite simple here" Hope said she gently tapped the candy her emblem glowed for a moment and the wrapping fizzed out.
Rosie put the candy in her mouth and quickly chewed and swallowed it, she then gave Hope a hug, she let go after a moment "Thank you miss, Ms Bea says Moosines are scawy but aren't scawy"
"Scary why would we be scary" Hope asked in disbelief with a smile
Rosie looked around and said "I am sowwy I need to go" she turned back and ran away and took a turn and was just out of sight.
"You couldn't just stop causing trouble for one day? what did we pay you for?" Hope heard Sally barking.
The sound of Sally's voice came from an alleyway, as Hope entered the alley the clean white paint started fading into rotting maroon bricks and the smell became foul coming from the open dumpster "Ewwwww" Hope said as she lowered the lid to try and lessen the stench
"Hey you know it's rude to close the lid on someone trying to fetch themselves a meal" a bald man barked as he popped out like a jack in the box he had a white beard wearing over shoulder strapped brown pants with a black plastic bag for a shirt and a metal can of beans for a hat and his left eye with a grey iris spinning his shoulder emblem only consisted of a simple brown circle, Hope screamed and ran away "Oh beans was that a Moonshine?" the man asked himself "Well I probably should skip town" he said to himself with a goofy smile while snapping his fingers.
Hope stopped running and started panting "Now you are lucky I am not here in head bashing duty or I would have sent you to a one way trip to the Outer ring and the monsters there could deal with you" Hope heard Sally scolding, she walked to the end of the alleyway the place beyond it was extremely different people clothes were worn out in which the holes were covered up by half baked sewn rotting fabric the road didn't exist it was simply a dirt undefined path and walls were all made of rotting bricks same as that of the alley, windows were broken and the stench of garbage filled the air, Hope saw Sally tying up a bunch of muscular men with a magic rope.
Sally glanced over and saw Hope "Princess what are you doing here?" she asked with dismay the rope holding the gangsters vanished they got up and shook of the dust and looked up and saw Hope and they all ran away in terror "Moonshine here run awway". All of a sudden all the people went indoors and the windows were sealed shut with wood and hammered with nails and just like that the place looked like a ghost town.

27 - F - 128lbs - 5 0’
Both of my knees feel really tight at the top when I bend it. My left knee hurts more bc that’s the leg I put my weight on when standing. It’s fine during the morning and day and gradually gets more painful at night and the pain started to radiate to my left calf. My knees feel swollen but don’t look swollen. I am still able to walk normally just sometimes get a quick sharp pain if landing weird. I have a couple of theories as to what caused this

1. went to a concert on 5/26 and stood on my tip toes the whole time
2. played pickle ball for a couple hours 2 days in a row.. pain started during a game 2nd day of pickle ball (5/28)

I am a server at a restaurant and have to be on my feet most of the day. It doesn’t bother me but i have been wearing a knee brace just incase. What can I do to help get my knees back to normal? I also think I have an allergy to advil, I wake up with a rash on my face after taking it. Could I take tylenol for swelling? Keep light walking or complete rest? Do you recommend hot yoga? Any advice welcomed, thank you!

Title: A Nightmare To Live In.
Theme: Nightmare Realities.
Pages.
Page 1.
War Ready Nightmare Freddy (Skin)
Geared Freddles (Back Bling)
War Claws (Built-In Pickaxe)
Freddle Ambush (Contrail)
Freddle Airship (Glider)
Sharp Finger Sharpening (Built-In Emote)
I Am Remade (Emoticon)
Fleshy Warrior (Spray)
Fleshy Armor (Wrap)
Monsters Under My Bed (Music Pack/Jam Track)
A War Of Nightmares (Loading Screen)
Page 2.
Nightmare Andy Flores (Skin)
Nightmarish Bat (Back Bling)
Nightmarish Bat (Pickaxe)
A Nightmarish Betrayal (Contrail)
Traitor Trailblazer (Glider)
Traitor's Laugh (Built-In Emote)
A Sinful Traitor (Emoticon)
Traitor Attack (Spray)
Bloody Betrayal (Wrap)
Nightmare Energy (Weapon Mod)
Lacey Vs Nightmare Andy (Loading Screen)
Page 3.
Nightmare Walten Mistress (Skin)
Tan Gas Container (Back Bling)
Claws From Your Nightmares (Built-In Pickaxe)
Tan Gas (Contrail)
Nightmarish Wings (Glider)
Gas Breath (Built-In Emote)
Nightmare's Glare (Emoticon)
Walten Stance (Spray)
A Room Of Tan Gas (Wrap)
Tan Gas Container (Weapon Mod)
Nightmare Gas (Loading Screen)
Page 4.
Rehab Doom (Skin)
Rehab Base Of DOOM (Back Bling)
Rehab Graduator (Pickaxe)
Rehab Energy Of Doom (Contrail)
Energy From Rehab (Built-In Glider)
Victory In Rehab (Built-In Victory Emote)
Glare From Rehab (Emoticon)
Capture Of Doom (Spray)
Rehab Doom Energy (Wrap)
Rehab Menace (Music Pack/Jam Track)
Rehab Leader (Loading Screen)
Page 5.
Catmare (Skin)
Catmare's Comfy Bed (Back Bling)
Catmare's Claws (Built-In Pickaxe)
Catmare Blood (Contrail)
Wings Of Catmare (Built-In Glider)
Catmare's Nap (Built-In Emote)
Who Woke Me Up?! (Emoticon)
Woken Beast (Spray)
Red Fur (Wrap)
Nightmare Radiation (Weapon Mod)
Don't Wake Up Catnap... (Loading Screen)
Page 6.
The Overthinking Master (Skin)
Overthinking Orb (Back Bling)
Overthinking Giver (Pickaxe)
Agony Thinking (Contrail)
OverflyingThinking (Glider)
Overthinking Energy (Built-In Emote)
The Overthinker (Emoticon)
Let It Take Control (Spray)
Overthought Energy (Wrap)
Overthinking Onsight (Music Pack)
Dark Energy's Descendant (Loading Screen)
Secret Page.
Pure Nightmare (Skin) Defeat Pure Nightmare (1)
Pure Nightmarecore (Back Bling) Destroy Beds (5)
Pure Nightmarish Claws (Built-In Pickaxe) Eliminate An Opponent With An Uppercut Of The Nitro Fists (1)
Pure Nightmare Blood (Contrail) Deal Damage As Pure Nightmare (2,000)
Nightmare Hoverboard (Glider) Eliminations With A Car Turret (10)
Demonic Nightmare Laugh (Built-In Emote) Emote As Pure Nightmare (1)
A Demonic Glare (Emoticon) Spot Opponents With A Sniper Scope (10)
A Growl Of A Nightmare (Spray) Crack Opponents Shields (10)
Nightmare Blood (Wrap) Headshot Opponents As Pure Nightmare (5)
Jaws (Music Pack/Jam Track) Dash Into An Opponent While Undergoing Nightmare-Juice (1)
Nightmare's Rage (Loading Screen) Eliminations As Pure Nightmare (10)
Bonus Page.
Wall Beast Titan (Skin)
Wall Rock (Back Bling)
Wall Beast's Claws (Built-In Pickaxe)
Rumbling Rocks (Contrail)
Rock Rammer (Glider)
Rumbling Walk (Built-In Emote)
Face Of Murder (Emoticon)
Horde Of Titans (Spray)
Rock Prints (Wrap)
Final Hours (Music Pack/Jam Track)
Bloody Titan Massacre (Loading Screen)
POIs: Nightmare Dome, Nightmare Tower, Nightmare Underbase, War Base: Nightmare, Betrayal Bastion, Gas Infested Industry, Rehab, Catmare's Lair, Overthinking Oasis, Pure Nightmare House, Rumbling Graveyard.
Bosses: War Ready Nightmare Freddy, Nightmare Andy Flores, Nightmare Walten Mstress, Rehab Doom, Catmare, The Overthinker, Pure Nightmare, Wall Beast Titan.
Items: War Ready Nightmare Freddy's Warforged AR, Nightmare Andy Flores's Bat, Nightmare Walten Mistress Tan Gas Container, Rehab Doom's Arcane Gauntlets, Rehab Doom's Mystical Bomb, Catmare's Claws, The Overthinker's Staff, Pure Nightmare's Claws.
Challenges.
Week 1: A Terrible Nightmare.
Search Chests At Nightmare Dome (7)
Eliminations At Brutal Beachhead (3)
Visit Nightmare Tower (1)
Deal Damage With Ranged Weapons (1,000)
Find Missing Freddles (3)
Defeat War Ready Nightmare Freddy (1)
Week 1 Reward: War Ready Nightmare Freddy (Bloody Aftermath)
Week 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14 And 15 Coming Soon.

I recently (last week) got a case of what I think was sinusitis (self diagnosed) for the first time. I still am experiencing swelling in my right sinus.
I am concerned about a small bump that I can feel near my right cheekbone, towards my nose. I’m unsure what it is, but it seems like it could be near or within the area of my right maxillary sinus.
Is this possibly a nasal polyp that I should be concerned about??
I know I should probably go see a specialist, but since it is a Friday I would be grateful for any advice on the issue, as many testimonies online suggest urgent care or walk-in clinics might not be specialized enough to provide the correct diagnosis.
I’ll include more detailed account of my experience below, if it helps.
—————
My symptoms started with intense and sudden tooth pain, bad enough that I was unable to sleep. At first I thought the issue might be tooth related, but the pain was not specific to any tooth, which led me to believe my sinuses were the issue. I ended up taking 200mg Advil to try to get some sleep, but it was not sufficient for the pain, and I could only sleep for about 2 hours max before waking up with heavy congestion and pain.
The sinus pressure built up over the day, and I used a nasal rinse in hopes of relieving symptoms naturally. I ended up buying some Sudafed over the counter to relieve the congestion. This was very effective, however it did give me an intense headache and since it is a stimulant, would not be an option to help me sleep. I ended up only taking Sudafed this once. Again, I needed an Advil to sleep.
The next day, I felt extremely weak, along with some discoloration of mucus I was spitting out, I assumed it was my body fighting the infection.
I started a routine of sinus rinse into hot shower / steaming my face over hot water for 10 minutes twice a day, some apple cider vinegar and ginger tea in the morning to reduce inflammation, and Advil to sleep and give my body some rest to help recover and have seen an improvement in my pain.
However, I still have jaw tightness in my right side, as well as pressure under my right eye. I can also feel the swollen sinus while not on Advil, which seems to help with the inflammation.
I have also become somewhat dependent on Advil to function, as the pain is enough to prevent me from doing anything productive. I take one during the day to work, and one at night to sleep.
This has been on going for the last week, and I thought I might be on the road to recovery, but I noticed a small bump near my cheek, close to where my sinus would be.
I’m concerned this could be a nasal polyp, which apparently does not go away by itself. Doing some research on the topic, some online articles mention that I should avoid NSAIDs like Advil if I do have nasal polyps.
As I am essentially dependent on Advil to function, I’m becoming very concerned about this bump. I am also between jobs atm, and do not have health insurance.
My situation is generating a great deal of stress for me, which can’t be beneficial to my recovery…
If anyone has a similar experience or any advice to offer, it would be very much appreciated.

Long read, here's some background music.
I woke up in a world I didn't recognize, and I didn't recognize myself as well. Who am I? Where am I? Why am I here? Did I always look like this? I kept asking myself these questions while I worked on repairing the crashed ship I found.
First, I felt it, I thought it was an earthquake, but then I heard it: an unimaginably loud roar coming out of multiple jaws at the same time, it was a proper sound for an entity as big as that... thing. It had the shape of a worm, but it had huge fangs and horns, it also had a few sets of small wings, which were actually quite big, but small in comparison to the rest of it's body. It couldn't fly, but it could steer slightly as it stormed through the skies, from underneath the ground and back in it again. A second, less deafening roar bounced between the mountains as I felt it burrowing in the ground.
As I was collecting the last few materials I needed, I remembered seeing this creature somewhere else, they usually gather in- ... A huge earthquake directly behind me, strong enough to make me fall to the ground. I turn around to see four of these giant worms emerge from their nest, and smaller creatures follow them shortly after. I blasted the engines of my jetpack on full power, I didn't even realize I had dropped a few things in the process. Luckily they didn't follow me, as I had exited their territory.
After gathering enough resources to sustain this harsh environment, I finished the repairs of the ship and took off. I went to the system's space station, hoping to trade with the few coins I had, and maybe find a way back home, if I ever had one to begin with.
I barely had the resources to repair the ship, so to save up on hyperdrive fuel I disengaged it a bit earlier. I immediately noticed something was wrong, the space station seemed to have been attacked, as there were signs of external damage and rubble floating around it. I feared it had been taken over by pirates as I entered it, but as I was flying through the long hall towards the landing pads, I saw something much worse: nothing.
Absolutely nothing. No trading posts, no signage of any kind, no guild, no trade terminal or teleporter... no people. Even the space station's core was missing. Was it still under construction? No, that's just stupid. What happened here? There were signs of a battle inside the station, but not a single body or ship.
I decided to check the nearby systems, maybe someone had escaped to one of them. Before leaving, I explored the rest of the system to build myself a warp engine and warp cells, but to my surprise all the planets had the same giant worms. Maybe a meteor shower brought them here? Maybe one of them had crashed in the space station? Did I... did I have something to do with all of this?
Forget about that, it's time to warp.
A strange eerie feeling arose in me as I landed in the new, broken and completely empty space station. There was nothing and no one in here as well. The same signs of struggle, but no bodies, not even a drop of blood, not the tiniest part of someone's suit. The planets were also infested with the same worms, though this time some of them presented Sentinel activity, at least not everything's completely dead.
I warped five more times. Five empty systems. This can't be happening everywhere, right?
I built a signal booster and traced a comms tower, I powered it up and started scanning desperately. Please, someone answer. I boost it's range. Someone, anyone? I manipulate the machinery to reach it's absolute maximum range. SOMEONE, I BEG YOU TO ANSWER! ... ... ...
My legs started to shake as I stood there, listening to the empty static of the transmission. I was about to give up and stop the connection, but right then I got it, the tiniest, faintest echo of a transmission. There is hope.
The signal is coming from... the anomaly? Of course! Why hadn't I thought about it before? I recomposed myself and, with a smile, got in my ship, took off the planet and summoned the anomaly.
After landing and exiting my ship, I noticed the place a bit too quiet... But at last, I found someone, or at least their remains, limbs hanging on the desk, their head was an unrecognizable mess, not like I could remember who they were, I barely even managed to remember the anomaly.
I walked through the corridors and all I could find was more gruesome scenes. The travel logs didn't indicate anything suspicious. They all arrived here... but never left, so where are their ships? There's no indications of any pirates or sentinels having been here, who could've done this? Unless... no, that's not possible, why would they do this to themselves?
As I reached the balcony of the second floor, my eyes widened as I saw the first person ever in such a long time, I couldn't be more excited! But I have to be careful, what if he's the murderer? I approached him slowly and carefully, but he wasn't moving a bit, he wasn't even looking at me, I don't think he noticed me. He seems to be asleep, or in some kind of trance, I don't know how to wake him up.
I decided to continue deeper into the anomaly, towards the signal, maybe I could finally get some answers. I reached a machine called Prime Terminal, it appeared to still be working, even though it was in a deplorable state, just like the rest of the anomaly.
Someone or something had answered, but it was not the kind of answer that I expected. It was asking for an object called "Mind Ark", and it gave me the instructions to build it.
The materials needed were quite strange, I had never seen them before, but my exosuit marked their locations on the galactic map, as if I had already done this before and it rembembered... nevermind. I focused my energy into this single task, as it appeared to be my only hope of contacting someone.
After a long journey, I did it, I built the Mind Ark. I went back to the anomaly and connected it to the Prime Terminal. I watched as thousands of strings composed by numbers moved at speeds I could not process, somehow it appeared to be transferring data to the Mind Ark.
My exosuit interpreted the final data as planetary coordinates, which led me to an ancient portal, built with a technology long lost, but somehow, the Mind Ark fitted perfectly in it. I let it do it's job and it opened the portal. A bit hesitant, but thinking it couldn't be worse than the situation I was in, I walked through it.
This feeling was strange, it was nothing like teleporting with our current technology, this was somehow more advanced.
I was in space by myself, with no ship! This is insane! I thought, I felt the stars warmth as I tried to maintain my composure, I let myself float in space, I became one with space. And then, a white light.
I woke up in a planet I didn't recognize, but this time I did recognize myself. My name is Artemis.
Once again I took off with my ship and I started warping to nearby systems, in search of someone that could help me. There was no one left in this Universe except for me and the great Atlas. How long had it been since I've been travelling? months? years? I do not know. I let my ship continue into the vast void of space as I closed my eyes and started dreaming.
I dreamt of a different universe, one that was full of people, one where there were no empty systems. One where someone came to my rescue.
The End.
Notes: If you've made it this far, thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing it. Adrift is the first expedition I get to play, and so far it's definitely something unique. I didn't think taking out all the npc's could make such a big difference in how you perceive the game, even though all the messages and random bases break the immersion a bit (maybe more than a bit).
After I reached the ending of Phase 2 / beginning of Phase 3 (I don't remember now the exact moment) where you need to "hyperdrive away and dream" I just needed to express how I felt during this expedition.
I did rush the ending of this narration, as it took quite longer to write than I expected in the first place, but I feel I managed to express perfectly how I felt during those last moments (I even put the song I was listening to at the beginning of the post).
Have a nice day and a lovely expedition travellers!

Hello,
Background: 27 Years Male, with a Good Career and a Beautiful Wife. I don't use Headphones often, and I don't usually listen to music at high volumes. I used to wear my Airpods to sleep listening to Podcasts at a very moderate volume. I am moderately overweight, and I have High Blood Pressure that I was still trying to control. Good
Incident: 26 Days ago (May 5th) I foolishly went to an Outdoor Gun Range with friends, I was given earplugs but unfortunately, they slipped multiple times and I shot multiple rounds without hearing protection and unfortunately, nobody directed me that this was stupid. We shot Pistols, Shotguns, and Semi Auto Guns. This was my first time shooting.
After the shooting, my ears were muffed and I was barely able to hear, I had temporary Tinnitus for maybe 1 hour after the shooting but it had gone away. For the next 3 days, I noticed I barely heard high frequencies (like Microwave beeps)... but after 3 days this started to recover and I was 100% normal after 1 week. I even went to a grocery store and to a restaurant and didn't feel any discomfort.
Symptoms: 16 Days ago (10 Days after shooting range) I started hearing a very mild ringing in my Right Ear, that became louder after a day, I also started feeling that I am sensitive to sounds (some sounds were piercing through my head), it was my Birthday and a lot was going on so I didn't bother. 2 days later the sound now became very obtrusive and I started googling... and now the Panic started! It was the weekend, and I scheduled an Appointment with ENT right after the weekend. During the weekend my Blood Pressure was 190/95! (up from its average 145~150/85-90)
At the ENT I had a hearing test and it showed a mild loss in the right ear in the 4K and 6K frequencies (30db).
14 Days after the shooting range, and 4 days since the symptoms started I received my first Dexamethasone shot directly to the ears, and I received a total of 3 Shots over A WEEK (8 days to be exact). I didn't get Oral Steroids because I was too anxious and unstable already. It's been 4 days since my 3rd shot.
Over this week I was in a super panic mode, I was not able to calm down and I only slept because I had no energy left, I cried, I wept, and I was angry and depressed, my wife was supportive but I am not sure for how long can I drain her beautiful soul.
I have since started limiting myself to reading success stories and listening to Podcasts about people who recovered.
I cannot deny that there has been a slight improvement since my symptoms started over 2 weeks ago. The first few days the ringing was LOUD, but I figured that when I got to quiet places the ringing started decreasing to be more like buzzing, the improvement happened with how fast I could go to this buzzing state.
Here are a few things I noticed about my Tinnitus and me in General:

1. It's reactive, specific sounds will flare up and increase the tone in my head, it goes from Buzzing to Ringing from the simplest exposure to specific sounds (especially running water).
2. I don't think I have Hyperacusis by the definition people here describe, it's not painful, it's the louder noises that increase my Tinnitus which causes me huge discomfort (but I wouldn't call it pain per se).
3. White Noise increases my Tinnitus but It's able to mask it. However, I prefer to sit in a quiet room and it decreases to the baseline electrical buzzing that I can tolerate more. Then I try to sleep listening to Podcasts.
4. On the second day of the Symptoms, I remember Yawning and ringing stopped for 5 minutes! Haven't been able to recreate this again.
5. I have a swollen wisdom tooth on the left side that has been swelling since the symptoms, this came and went before in my life, not sure if it's relevant, but swelling often also increases when Tinnitus increases (but so does the panic so might be a coincidence)
6. I used to clench on my teeth when stressed, 1 month before the symptoms my jaw would sometimes hurt from my clenching, but I became thoughtful of this and was able to recover.
7. When I wake up in the middle of the night my brain is probably filtering out the ringing, but the moment I move it starts to ring again.
8. When I plug my ears with my fingers and move my jaw, I can feel some rattling/roughness in the right ear, I can't describe the sound, but it feels like it's not "well-oiled". My ENT said that this could be due to my brain amplifying all noises from my right ear, but I don't believe this because I can physically feel differences.
9. The biggest spike I had happened when I was sleeping, I woke up to the biggest spike and I was in a quiet room.

I accept that I have made a mistake, I hope to fully recover, but If I can't, is there is a chance I'll get better to the level that it doesn't bother me ? I am looking for your support.
Thank you.

Art image link: https://www.reddit.com/OnePiece/comments/1cktegm/inu_inu_no_mi_model_cerberus_oc/
Animal background:
Cerberus is the legendary and powerful three-headed hellhound who is the pet of the Greek God Hades. He guards the entrance of the Underworld in Greek Mythology, preventing souls from escaping as well as illegal entry into the afterlife. Heracles had to defeat and borrow Cerberus for a while to present to King Eurystheus as his final Labor before returning him to Hades. He is also said to have manes made of snakes with a snake's head for a tail in some depictions (Mine just has the snake tail), as well as sharp teeth, jaws and claws that can bite and rend through almost anything, he can also devour souls. Cerberus devil fruit is bigger and superior to Garm's.
Awakening: Guardian of Hades
User in Beast or Hybrid form becomes bigger and jet black in color, with a red veil of soul energy wrapped around their body, their head manes and snake head's mane becomes red and flowing. User becomes way stronger, faster, more durable in this form, can also spilt themselves into 3 hellhounds. User's soul manipulation powers grow exponentially and can open portals to the Underworld, as well as summon countless black chains to bind and whip opponents with.
​
Abilities:
1) Keen senses of sight (Also has night vision), smell and hearing (Can smell and track down people from anywhere via the scent of their souls)
Techniques:
- Soul seeker: User concentrates, smelling their target's scent and marks their target's distinct soul and haki, so as to be able to track them from anywhere in the world no matter where they are. User cannot be fooled by transformation techniques and illusions, can immediately tell an opponent's identity no matter what as long as they have their scent recognized.
- Styx hado: User can predict their opponent's movements and attacks by reading their soul.
​
2) Multiple heads, powerful sharp teeth and jaws that can bite through almost anything, sharp claws, powerful howl, temporarily splitting into three single-headed individuals
Techniques:
- Cerberus mauling: User in beast form lunges at their opponent jaws first, biting and ripping their opponents to pieces. (Can be enhanced with haki)
- Cerberion ripper: User in beast or hybrid form grabs their opponents head with their main head and opponents arms with their two other heads and jaws, and rips apart their opponents heads and arms off instantly.
- Hell fang pistols: User in beast or hybrid form enhances their fangs and jaws with haki and unleashes three biting shockwaves that home in and gouge holes into whatever they bite.
- Cerberus claw: User in beast or hybrid form slashes their enemies apart with their sharp claws. (Can be enhanced with haki)
- Cerberus meteor fall: User leaps high into the air in beast form, then crash lands into the opponent paws first to crush them to death, creating a crater upon impact.
- Hell howling: User in beast form howls loudly, creating a powerful sound wave attack that blasts opponents back and knocks them out with haki.
- Ten finger pistol: Black fangs: User in hybrid form coats all ten of their fingers and claws in haki and quickly stabs their opponent in the chest, before tearing them in half.
- Tempest kick: Cerberus three: User in hybrid form unleashes a powerful air shockwave with their foot claws that splits into three and bounces toward the enemy before causing a big explosion.
- Tempest kick: Dark moon arc: User in hybrid form unleashes a powerful haki-enhanced air shockwave with their foot claws in a wide black arc that cuts and slashes enemies in a wide area.
- Thanatos Rokuogan: User in hybrid form holds their opponents arms with their two other heads and jaws before unleashing a devastating haki-enhanced shockwave with both clawed hands that blasts a hole through their opponent.
Awakened Techniques:
- Hades fang pistols: User in their awakened beast or hybrid form unleashes three haki and soul-enhanced biting shockwaves that are more powerful than their standard fang pistols.
- Hellhound's ravaging: User in their awakened beast or hybrid forms run at their enemies at high speeds and goes on a bloody rampage, biting, clawing, devouring and ripping apart anyone who stands in their way.
- Cerberion claw: User in their awakened beast or hybrid forms unleashes a more powerful haki and soul-enhanced claw attack that creates large arcs of air slashes that slices apart opponents.
- Tempest kick: Great serpent: User in their awakened hybrid form unleashes a huge, fast black air slash attack from their foot claws that quickly slithers towards enemies in a snake-like fashion, slicing apart anything in its path.
- Hand pistol: Heart breaker: User in their awakened hybrid form coats their clawed hand in haki and soul energy and then stabs through their opponents chests to rip out their heart before crushing it.
- Cerberus trio: User in beast or hybrid form temporarily splits into three individuals in their awakened form, forming a small pack.
Hungry hellhounds: The three users gang up on and bite and tear apart their opponents at high speeds until they are dead and devoured.
Fang pistol storm: The three users unleash a barrage of fang pistol attacks to bite apart and destroy everything in their wake.
Thanatos Rokuogan: Drei: The three users in hybrid form surround their opponent and then unleash Thanatos Rokuogan simultaneously to utterly destroy their enemy from all angles.
​
3) Snake head tail with venomous fangs, poison generation (Venom effects include giddiness, bleeding and pain)
Techniques:
- Venom fangs: User uses their snake head to bite their opponents and inject them with venom
- Venom Plague: User uses their snake head to spray poison gas at their opponents.
- Venom missile: User uses their snake head to shoot a fast powerful blob of acidic venom that burns and explodes on contact.
- Cerberion coils: User uses their snake head to lunge and coil around their opponents, and constrict them to death.
Awakened Techniques:
- Venom hunting ground: User in awakened beast or hybrid form uses their snake head to unleash an enormous cloud of poison gas that covers the battlefield, killing and weakening all enemies in that area, while the user hides in the poisonous mist and ambushes unsuspecting foes too.
- Venom fang pistol: User in awakened beast or hybrid form quickly unleashes a venom coated biting shockwave from their snake jaws that melts and poisons whatever it bites into.
- Tri serpent tear: User in awakened hybrid form splits into three and uses all 3 of their snake tails to constrict, bite and rip apart their opponents in one go.
​
4) Soul devouring and soul manipulation, counter to soul-based devil fruit powers, the more souls the user devours and collects the stronger they become
Techniques:
- Soul ripper: User in beast or hybrid form gathers soul energy and then rips out the soul of their enemies with their teeth and jaws to devour it.
- Hades vortex: User in beast form unleashes a torrent of souls from a large underworld portal in the form of a tornado that blows away and rips apart opponents caught up in it, before collecting any deceased souls back into the underworld.
- Soul hound scout: User in beast or hybrid form summons a soul collected from the underworld and forms it into a hellhound scout to search and track down opponents as well as attack them with.
- Soul hound body lock: User in awakened hybrid form summons multiple soul hound scouts that bite and restrain their opponent to hold them in place so the user can finish them off.
Awakened Techniques:
- 13th labor: Cerberion Legion: User in their awakened hybrid form summons a huge portal that unleashes a legion of soul hounds to attack large groups of enemies with.
- Tartarus howling: User in awakened beast form gathers all their soul energy and unleashes a devastating haki-enhanced howl of soul energy that blasts away anyone in their wake, as well as decimating the landscape.
- 14th labor: Raging Cerberion Pack: User in awakened hybrid form splits themselves into three and unleashes a legion of soul hounds, all three users and their legion gang up on their target, biting, clawing and ripping them apart in a flash before smashing them to the ground. (Inspired by Akuma's raging demon attack and Naruto's Uzumaki Barrage)
- 15th Labor: Cerberion Soul Beast Bomb: User in awakened beast form gathers all their soul energy in their jaws and unleashes a combined condensed bomb of souls that creates a massive explosion upon contact and can destroy mountains, user can collect any souls lingering in the decimated area after their enemies are dead.
​
5) Creating portals to the underworld, black chain summoning and manipulation
Techniques:
- Hell port: User in beast form or hybrid form creates a portal to the underworld, they can escape from danger by escaping into the underworld or drag people with them, as well as teleporting short distances.
- Chains of hades: User summons chains from the underworld to drag opponents as well as their souls into the underworld.
- Black chain whip: User summons a single chain from the underworld to whip and strike their opponents with, sending them flying.
- Portal guillotine: User summons portals, drags opponents to the portals headfirst and closes the portals to decapitate them.
Awakened Techniques:
- Black jaws of death: User in awakened beast or hybrid form disappears into a portal, they then summon multiple portals that they emerge with their multiple heads from, biting and tearing apart their opponent from all angles.
- Cerberion trio storm: User in awakened hybrid form creates multiple portals, then splits themselves into three and jumps from portal to portal while biting and slashing their enemies to pieces simultaneously.
- Black chain execution: User in awakened beast or hybrid form unleashes multiple chains from portals that impales opponents and rips them apart.
- Black chain binding: User in awakened beast or hybrid form unleashes multiple chains from portals that binds opponents and restrains them, making it easier for the user to kill them.
- Black chain lash out: User in awakened hybrid form splits themselves into three and unleashes multiple portals and from those portals multiple black chains that lash out, whipping and destroying everything in their vicinity.
​
6) Weapon techniques: Hybrid form wields dual chained hook blades (Hades reaper claws) that can slash and tear through almost anything, can be coated in venom, and also be enhanced with soul energy to rip souls from the bodies of enemies (Based on Claws of Hades weapons from God of War series) (Can be enhanced with haki)
Techniques:
- Soul reaper: User launches their chained hook blades at their opponents chests to rip the souls out of their enemies.
- Hook harpoon: User launches their chained hook blades at their opponents to impale them and drag their opponents closer for a follow up attack.
- Chained evisceration: User launches their chained hook blades at their opponents to impale them and rip their chest open.
- Cerberion head snatcher: User launches their chained hook blades to impale their targets head and yank their chains to rip their targets head clean off. (If this fails to impale and rip off opponents heads, opponents will still get slashed and cut by the hook blades)
- Cerberus chain cycle: User runs towards their enemies and spins their chained hook blades in dual arcs, slicing apart anyone caught up in this attack.
- Cerberus chain choke: User launches their chained hook blades at their opponents and wraps their chains around their opponents necks to strangle them to death.
- Cerberus chain slingshot: User launches their chained hook blades into the ground beside their opponent, the user then stretches the chains further back before jumping and slingshoting themselves towards their opponent at blinding speeds to send them flying or tear them in half.
- Savage ripper: User uses their multiple heads and jaws, and their chained hook blades to rip their opponents apart at close range.
- Hades venom cross: User coats their chained hook blades in venom and haki and unleashes a huge venomous cross slash onto their opponents to poison and slice them apart.
- Cerberus venom arcs: User coats their chained hook blades in venom and haki and unleashes multiple poison flying slashes that poisons and slices apart all in their wake.
Awakened Techniques:
- 12th labor: Cerberion Rage: User in awakened hybrid form creates multiple hell portals and quickly slashes their opponents from all angles with their haki-enhanced chained hook blades via the portals, before dashing towards them and finishing them off in a single almighty slash.
- Soul reaper cyclone: User in awakened hybrid form gathers a large amount of soul energy into their chained hook blades before spinning them rapidly to summon a large tornado of souls at their opponent to slice them apart and blow them away.
- Soul pack's revenge: User in awakened hybrid form splits into three, then slashes their opponents to death with their chained hook blades from multiple angles in varying combos.
- Claws of Hades: Frenzy: User in awakened hybrid form rapidly slashes their opponents apart with their chained hook blades at blinding speeds from a distance, not relenting until their target is dead.
- Claws of Hades: Titan's flash: User in awakened hybrid form gathers all their soul energy into their haki-enhanced chained hook blades before unleashing 4 gigantic arcs of black flying slashes that can carve and tear apart mountains.
​
​
Weaknesses:
Standard devil fruit weaknesses of being unable to swim and sea prism stone, as well as soul ripping not working well against strong-willed opponents.
User's keen senses of sight, smell and hearing can be countered by bright flashes of light, horrific odors and high pitched noises.
User in full beast form is particularly aggressive and bloodthirsty, making them hard to reason with once they go on a killing spree in beast form.
User in their awakened form becomes extremely violent, ferocious and even more aggressive, becoming a threat to both allies and enemies alike, after their awakened state ends, user becomes tired and exhausted.
User can only split to three individuals in their awakened form, after awakening state is done user forms back into one unit, when split into three all users speed increases but their power decreases.
User's soul constructs will disappear if hit by a powerful attack, user has limits as to how long they can summon souls for as it is tiring.
User's summoned black chains can still be destroyed by strong opponents.
User cannot use certain powerful finishing moves twice in a row as they take up energy to do so.
User's heads can still grow back if cut off but takes up lots of stamina to do so.
User can still be hurt and injured by powerful haki-enhanced attacks.
​

Dunno what else to do. Tired of being in pain and getting no answers from professionals.
31M, in Canada. Been having neck pain 'headaches' in the same spot of my neck (right side, base of skull, marked with X) for probably 10+ years now. In the last few (3) years it feels like it has progressed to being much more frequently. Maybe longer actually, as I've just got used to this "being the norm".
Some times it's a bit better, in the last two months the best span I've had is 8 days headache free, but more often it's a headache every 48 hours. I would really like to have more than 2 good days a week where I feel functional enough to actually do things and not be a zombie.
Can't understand if there's any specific trigger, and have been trying to nail it down for years. Usually it's laying in bed trying to sleep the neck pain will start to creep up. But not always. Some days I wake up with a dull ache on the spot of neck that always get's unhappy, that I know by the end of the day will progress into a full blown headache.
Neck pain in the marked spot is throbbing. Don't really do anything but take Advil and wait for it to calm down. Ice doesn't help, heat doesn't help. On the days that I don't have this throbbing headache like pain, the rest of my neck muscles still feel tight. Especially sub-occipitals, SCM, upper traps traps, and jaw muscles from behind/under ear all the way along chin/throat. And also random headband like tightness on forehead, eyes, top of head sometimes. Some days it's not so bad and I can forget about it, other days it's like a dull tightness, like those muscles are flexed and just won't relax. Squeezing and have a heavy weight to them, with a crawling tingly. Or like a pulling on the occiptals
Feels like there's just a slowly building up bad-ness, and once that reaches a threshold it explodes into a throbbing neck pain on the right side base of skull location. Maybe some days I sleep on it wrong, maybe some days I exert harder just doing stuff around the house, and those things depend on how many days it takes until it gets bad and is Advil time.
Pre 2018 - Saw physio and talked to doc about this, but basically just lived with it thinking it was normal. Probably started noticing it like 2010, but can not remember really. Don't think it was very frequent, maybe once or twice a month at that point.
2018 - brought this up to my doc. Saw PT weekly for a few months. Said weak back muscles/postural. Gave me exercises. Didn't see any improvement over months. Tried two bouts of dry needling, massages before appointments. Saw a neuro, scanned my brain and it was fine. Not really my neck though. They thought maybe migraines, put on meds, didn't help. (Did have a reaction that had me rushed to the hospital because throat closed up and thought I dying though!)
2020 - Just had been living with it since. Felt like it was time to have another look at it. Talked to doc again, suggested physio again. More massages, non-manipulative chiro (idk they used a little pressure tool on me that went pop and did absolutely nothing). Gave up after months of spending money seeing specialists and not having any relief
2023 - Got hit with vestibular neuritis (yuck) after a viral infection. After that passed, doc suggested physio to help deal with aftereffects. New physio, helps with that, but also turns into trying to treat this neck pain again since I'm there already. See him every 2 weeks for 6 months. Thinks it's weak shouldeneck muscles just getting too exhausted throughout the day under normal use, and then flairs up/tightens up around the nerve there. Gives me general strengthening/stretches, as well as neck/shoulder stretches. (Chin tucks, shoulder shrugs, squeezing shoulder blades together). I do these every second day slowly trying to build up my endurance. But even going very lightly seems to (~2 hours after exercises) cause the neck to start throbbing. I try and "power through this" for a few months, headaches every day, and no improvement. I give up seeing him, and stop doing exercises. Headaches improve slightly from not being irritated from stretches every day (at least that's what I think)
2024 - Bring it up with my doctor again that my headaches are still destroying my life. He suggests a few things to try again. I start getting massages every week for a month, and then every 2 weeks. Massages seem to sometimes help (best "headache free span" was right after a massage, for 8 whole days! but only got that kind of relief once). Try a few simple neck/shoulder stretches, and 2 hours later trying to go to bed, again massive pain.
See a new PT, thinking maybe they'll have a different opinion. Assesses me to find no structural issues with my neck/spine. (But no imaging). Waiting on my next big headache so he can assess me during a flair up and see if there's any different. Talks about nerve blocks, or surgery, or very careful c-spine manipulation (no). Feels around my neck like all PT's have, testing range of motion and stuff. Come out of the appointments (2 so far) feeling like they didn't do anything. No homework or things to try or not to try at home. Just see me again next week and I'll try and release your muscles(?). He says it's not a 'headache' since headaches are in the front of the head, but is more just "cervicogenic neck pain". Terminology I guess.
Brought up the fact that my right side shoulder clicks when I rotate my arm. How my SCM and upper traps feel tight, and how my neck right side muscles "feel pinchy" when I turn both ways, and how those muscles on the right side of where my neck always hurts, feel different to me than the left when I self massage. (Left feels like a tight cloth draped over my neck, that when I try and press in I can't press in deep enough to even touch the neck-vertebra bump thing. But on the right it feels looser, and like there's a divot above and below that right neck-vertebra bump. Like this.) And also that sometimes I feel a bit "wobbly" in my neck, like a bobble head. But no dizzy-room-spinning.
He doesn't comment on any of those, other than "it seems a bit far fetched that your shoulder could be causing your neck pain". Which goes against most of the things I've read about things like forward head posture and cervicogenic headaches, but I'm not the expert I guess. He mentions that maybe migration medication would be useful to try, but wants to see me a few more times before we decide on a "plan". Tried migraine medication 6 years ago for this, did nothing, and feels like I'm going in circles again. Mentions (but doesn't suggest) that surgery can be done to like...open up the space for my nerve. And also nerve blocks. Surgery seems scary and not guaranteed to even help. Nerve blocks less scary, but seems like just a bandaid instead of a way to fix the issue.
My health is good otherwise. No trauma or car accidents with my neck. My weight is good. I'm not as active as I should be but feels like whenever I try it triggers this neck pain. I am self employed so luckily I can take as much time as I need to soothe a headache when it happens. Work at a computer most days. Standing desk. Proper posture, as of 6 years ago. Have even tried staying off the computer for a month and had no noticeable difference. Thought maybe it is related to sleep posture. Tried like 8 different "neck" pillows. Tried sleeping on the floor for a month because maybe mattress was too soft or something. I like to sleep on my side/stomach, so maybe kinking my neck all night. But trying hard to break that habit.
Anyone gone through something similar? Or have had success dealing with this kind of pain somehow? Frustrated with my new PT, and feeling like this is just something I'm going to end up having to live with and it sucks lol. Not sure what else to do. Do I continue to try and power through exercies? Find a PT and also personal trainer to strengthen my neck in a controlled way that will be less likely to cause pain. More massages? More needling (would try it again). Ask for actual proper imaging? Long post, but I'm feeling a bit lost.

Does anyone have any tips for living with symptoms but no official diagnosis (or support from family/healthcare providers)?
I have listed my symptoms below and explained a bit of my story under spoilers, as to not detract from the general request for advice, only provide context.
Symptoms: - severe joint pain in my hands, fingers, toes, knees, hips, shoulders, and my jaw - joint stiffness in my knees, elbows, shoulders, fingers, and hands - the combination of joint pain and stiffness in my shoulders has made it so I cannot eat or cook without having to intermittently change hands - right inner elbow has been consistently swollen with a sac of fluid for over 7 years now - can't carry a 5lb bag of sweet potatoes for less than five minutes in the grocery store without getting tired and dizzy - will experience discolouration and numbness in my hands and feet. If I sit down for more than twenty minutes, my feet will start turning purple--my friends in school used to call me corpse feet (affectionate, I hope). My hands can discolour while I'm shopping for groceries. If I get cold my fingers and toes will turn purple then white and lose all feeling. - my feet will go numb, without warning, while I'm driving. It doesn't matter if I have been driving for twenty minutes or an hour, I risk my feet going numb and making it difficult to gauge pressure on gas/brake - I get severe nerve pain in my arms that travels up my arm, not down. No inciting movements or actions that trigger the nerve pain. It has happened while I was driving, cooking, stirring a vinaigrette for my grandma. - chronic severe chest pain that has led me to think I was having a heart attack over seven times (if I ever had a heart attack, I'd probably just think "it's just the pain" and miss it). It gets worse when I take a deep breath and can make me feel short of breath - joint stiffness in the mornings and evenings especially - muscle pain... everywhere - sun sensitivity that causes severe migraines, rashes on my arms (and on my cheeks), and fatigue. I cannot be out in the sun for more than twenty minutes without feeling nauseous and wanting to hide in the dark like a vampire (cravings for blood, thankfully, isn't one of my symptoms) - sores in my mouth - severe fatigue (waking up feels exhausting in itself) that can leave me nearly falling asleep at restaurants with my family and struggling to keep my eyes open while driving - brain fog - sore and dry eyes - all of my joints pop (even my jaw) - blurry vision as if under water, no warning before it happens - vertigo - weakness (cannot grip stuff very well and have struggled to open ziploc bags while trying to give my cats treats) - ears ringing - low grade fevers (had a weekend where it wouldn't drop below 40 degrees Celsius but it tends to stick around 37-38 degrees Celsius) - positive ANA of 1:160 with coarse speckled pattern
My Story:
I have had joint pain, swelling, and stiffness since I was 14 years old. I'm 25 now. Most of my symptoms I have been experiencing for almost a decade now. I have a family history of rheumatoid arthritis and have had a doctor test my blood for rheumatoid factor but it always came back within regular range. Two years ago, I tested positive for ANA after my chronic illness caused me to lose my job. It was first 1:160 then 1:80 when we tested again a couple months later.
The world then shut down due to Covid and I had numerous doctors tell me they wouldn't see me unless I tested positive for Covid. I understand. It was an incredibly difficult time for healthcare workers.
My symptoms, however, did not care about the overworked healthcare system and continued to interfere with my day-to-day life.
I have had an MRI done to check my spine and neck, confirming there's nothing pinched that would be causing my nerve pain. The doctor ended up telling me it might be because I was born premature and I'll just have to live with it.
I have had ultrasounds and a CT scan done on my swollen elbow and never heard anything back which I'm choosing to take as "we didn't see anything alarming".
Now I am scared to drive alone due to my symptoms and live in constant pain. I have tried to see doctors about this and have been told "you're too young to have these issues" or "it's probably depression, you're too young for it to be anything else"... I finally got into a new doctor and they sent a referral for me to see a rheumatologist, especially given my previous positive ANA test.
Rheumatologist wanted updated bloodwork. All my bloodwork came back in normal range. My doctor point-blank told me "there's nothing wrong with you, your blood is fine, a rheumatologist will not help you" and then told me my symptoms are too complex for me to continue seeing them... so that feels a little like a kick in the stomach.
My mom, who means well, and lives with her own chronic pain, tells me it's because I don't have a routine (I have t been able to find a new job after losing another job due to my medical issues) and if I had a strict routine I wouldn't have so many issues. She's also of the opinion you need to just find the energy to combat fatigue...
I feel alone a lot of the time and like I'm trapped in my body that's failing on me.
If anyone has any tips, I would greatly appreciate it.

I am about a week into Kit 1 and I started getting crazy Sleep Apnea effects at night. Last night I kept waking up every few minutes because I felt like I couldn’t breathe. And my whole body was going stiff and numb.
Yesterday I skipped a day of taking my pills and I still got crazy night effects. And now I feel slight tightness in my chest since yesterday.
Anyone else felt this?

I was raped by my older(20 something-year-old cousin in my "sleep".
I'm 15 and don't know what to do. I was too traumatized when it happened a few months ago (I still am) to talk about it or say anything about it to anybody. I don't like cops and therapy is out of the question cause we can't afford it. I'm scared to let my boyfriend touch me now and I swear I'm gonna loose him over this bull shit.
Some background. I'm kinda a heavy sleeper and when I know something is wrong I wake up. I woke up to him touching me one night and I just stayed still. I had on a zebra onesie. It wasn't even tight to the skin just a little loose. I was laying on my stomach with my stuffed alacorn next to me. I feel him touching my butt and thighs and he tried to touch my breasts but I moved a little toale him think I was waking up so he would stop He did stop but only for 120 seconds. I counted so I could get my mind of it.
He textede a few days later "Hello butterfly" knowing dam well I only like and respond to one nick name.
I didn't respond and deleted the message, not I'm regretting it.
A couple days after the message he came to smoke with my mom and I fell asleep with only my boyfriends hoodie on. I saw him leave and didn't think he would come back.
I wake up I think around mid night cause I had to get up for an MRI scan at 7 and I was fully refreshed when I woke up the second time. I feel his hands in places they shouldn't be. I made the mistake of laying on my back. He fingered me and he licked down there. The most I've ever had before that was fingering myself. It hurt a lot and I wanted it to stop but I was to scared to move.
I'm scared for my self and my little cousin. She's 9 and already has small breasts and a butt. I don't want him to do what he did to me to her.
Edit: My mom wouldn't believe me if I did tell her and she would say something like why didn't you have clothes on or something. I just needed to get that out cause I'm scared he's gonna do it again.

I've been on TRT for ~2 years now and for about one of those and after a good few blood tests, I decided on a protocol of 100mg a week of Test C, .25mg of Anastrazole and ~500iU of HCG split up in to 3 doses on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday.
I've never once missed a dose but I went away for a weekend a couple of weeks ago and missed the Friday and when I got back, I decided to take 120mg of Test C instead and see what happened as I might as well do a bit of experimentation if I'm on this for life.
A few days after that, I've felt the best I've ever done. Full of energy, sleeping well and waking up like a brick which I've not yet done on TRT but a few days later and I'm full of energy at night and can't sleep, got acne on my arms and my balls feel tight and high and I really just don't have the same libido I did even on the usual protocol.
My question, to somebody a bit more experienced is what I could do to reach that sweet spot that's obviously somewhere in between.
I'm thinking I should try and take more AI little by little as I'm assuming that I felt great with the extra Test boost but then began to feel worse as I aromatised in to E2 and it's maybe a little high? Either that or keep the AI at 0.12mg and reduce the Test to 110 and see what happens then? At the same time, my Free T is around 1nmol/L on my usual protocol anyway and my E2 is around the high end @ 155pmol/L so maybe I'm just pushing this a bit far for TRT? Either way, my Total T is only at 30nmol/L because my SHBG is crushed even before starting TRT.
Apologies for the saga but any input or ideas would be greatly appreciated!

I've been on TRT for ~2 years now and for about one of those and after a good few blood tests, I decided on a protocol of 100mg a week of Test C, .25mg of Anastrazole and ~500iU of HCG split up in to 3 doses on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday.
I've never once missed a dose but I went away for a weekend a couple of weeks ago and missed the Friday and when I got back, I decided to take 120mg of Test C instead and see what happened as I might as well do a bit of experimentation if I'm on this for life.
A few days after that, I've felt the best I've ever done. Full of energy, sleeping well and waking up like a brick which I've not yet done on TRT but a few days later and I'm full of energy at night and can't sleep, got acne on my arms and my balls feel tight and high and I really just don't have the same libido I did even on the usual protocol.
My question, to somebody a bit more experienced is what I could do to reach that sweet spot that's obviously somewhere in between.
I'm thinking I should try and take more AI little by little as I'm assuming that I felt great with the extra Test boost but then began to feel worse as I aromatised in to E2 and it's maybe a little high? Either that or keep the AI at 0.12mg and reduce the Test to 110 and see what happens then? At the same time, my Free T is around 1nmol/L on my usual protocol anyway and my E2 is around the high end @ 155pmol/L so maybe I'm just pushing this a bit far for TRT? Either way, my Total T is only at 30nmol/L because my SHBG is crushed even before starting TRT.
Apologies for the saga but any input or ideas would be greatly appreciated!