I was curious if other people had a preference as to which network/streamer adapted First Law (if a series adaptation ever happens). I know the Best Served Cold movie that's been in pre-production hell is being produced by Skydance, which means they likely have contractual rights to adaptation. Assuming they decide to pivot and make a television series, the most likely homes would be either Paramount or Apple, as those are the 2 places that Skydance regularly works with (more so Apple on the TV front).
I wouldn't be unhappy if Apple was the home for it because they at least have a record of not canceling their shows early like a lot of networks, and they've produced some high quality shows (Severance, Black Bird). I know a lot of people suggest HBO as they have the best track record of any streaming service, but I feel like this is very unlikely to ever happen. They have already have Game of Thrones and its spinoffs and I don't think they would want to add another dark adult fantasy show to their repertoire as they already have that area covered.
I feel like FX would be a good home for it. The aesthetic they've created for Shogun, putting their resources into costumes and atmosphere instead of action sequences, I feel like would fit the First Law universe. John Landgraf is probably the executive with the highest batting average, and he frequently lets creators have more control over their shows (Atlanta, The Americans, Reservation Dogs being good examples) than other executives. I feel like FX would be the network where First Law would thrive the best.
I don't think any other network would be a good home for it. I dread it ever being picked up by Netflix or Amazon who seem to butcher any fantasy show they touch. I wasn't able to get through Wheel of Time, The Witcher or Shadow and Bone and I'm on the verge of giving up on Rings of Power if the new season doesn't impress early. Also, I don't think the niche humor and vibe of the show is something that would work on these streamers.
In conclusion, I think the network that would adapt First Law the best would be FX, the most likely to adapt it would be Apple (which I think would do a solid job), I don't think HBO would touch it, and I dread it ever being adapted by Netflix or Amazon. I'm curious if anyone else has any takes on this. I know that the talent involved in the development matters more than the network ultimately, but I do feel that the quality of the show can be heavily impacted by the network involved.

Hello; really loved the interaction with my first post, so thanks so much for that! I'll just reiterate: spoilers for all Star Trek, and everything is just my opinion.
900) Unnatural Selection (1989)
TNG 2x7
Writer: John Mason & Mike Gray
Director: Paul Lynch
We've seen this idea done before and better. Yeah, it's a little bit different this time: it centres around children genetically engineered to be free of disease (isn't that illegal in the Federation?). But the actual plot of the episode is little different from TOS' The Deadly Years, with Doctor Pulaski aging and trying to find a cure for the condition. An uninspired repeat of a TOS episode that wasn't even that good in the first place.
899) We'll Always Have Paris (1988)
TNG 1x23
Writer: Deborah Dean Davis & Hannah Louise Shearer
Director: Robert Becker
Bored me stiff. I'm not always a huge fan of time travel stuff in general, and this is one of the least dynamic uses of that story type I've ever seen. Picard also has some weak character development, in his reminiscence about the girlfriend he left behind to join Starfleet, after he runs into her in this episode. The resolution with Data is fine, though, and I do like that they used him, as somebody less affected by the Maddox Effect, to solve the problem. Functional, just really dull.
898) Angel One (1988)
TNG 1x13
Writer: Patrick Barry
Director: Michael Rhodes
I will say that, as a teenage boy and as a young man now, this episode did give me empathy for what women go through in real life: being dismissed as weak and soft and barred from meaningful work. Beyond that, however, this episode really says nothing. It feels like it wants to be a deep and compelling exploration of gender roles, but apart from that feeling of empathy it gave me it doesn't accomplish anything of the kind. It's just a rote story about an oppressed section of society trying to combat their oppressors, and Riker saves the dissidents from being executed with a dull speech.
897) Silicon Avatar (1991)
TNG 5x4
Writer: Jeri Taylor, story by Lawrence V Conley
Director: Cliff Bole
Oh, just what I always wanted: the return of the Crystalline Entity from Datalore! Most anticipated villain return ever! But seriously, this could have been an interesting episode exploring a decent creature, but all that ends up happening is the Enterprise chasing the Crystalline Entity while Data has conversations with the mother of one of the victims of its attack on his colony. I will say that her hatred of Data got some genuine emotion out of me, as I raise my hackles against anyone who dares attack that loveable android, and seeing her come round to him was reasonably satisfying. But I still wasn't intrigued by their conversations, or the story of her seeking revenge for her son's death. The actual murder of the Crystalline Entity was done with a decent weight, but the episode takes forever to get there, through a slog of boring conversations and virtually no emotional investment for me.
896) The Outrageous Okona (1988)
TNG 2x4
Writer: Burton Armus, story by Les Menchen, Lance Dickson & David Landsberg
Director: Robert Becker
An aimless, artless story of a rogue caught between two fathers hounding him for his misdeeds. I don't find Okona amusing or charming, so his heavy presence in the episode doesn't do anything for me, and the story surrounding him is weak too. Data's stand-up comedy stuff is quite funny; Brent Spiner plays it brilliantly. I particularly enjoy the scene where he's trying out his act on Guinan, and it's just so bad. Also love Whoopi Goldberg's delivery of 'No' after Data asks her if his act was good. But this B-plot has only a flimsy connection to the main story, and therefore its presence leaves the end product feeling messy as well as weak.
895) Bounty (2003)
ENT 2x25
Writer: Hans Tobeason, Mike Sussman & Phyllis Strong, story by Rick Berman & Brannon Braga
Director: Roxann Dawson
An A-plot and B-plot that are both very bad. The story of Archer getting kidnapped by a bounty hunter is rote and uninspired, and definitely feels like it was one of the last ideas the writers came up with for the season. They were just filling time with a poor sequel to the earlier episode Judgement. His interactions with the Tellarite do not interest me at all, and I do not care about the Tellarite's lost ship. The B-plot with T'Pol prematurely going through the Pon Farr sees some of the worst sexualisation of the character, plus some cringey dialogue between her and Phlox. Archer's ending escape from the Klingons, with the Tellarite's secret help, is solid, though.
894) The Omega Glory (1968)
TOS 2x23
Writer: Gene Roddenberry
Director: Vincent McEveety
Goes from mundane to insane. For much of its runtime I would give this my label of dull but functional: there's a rogue Starfleet Captain trying to discover the secret to eternal youth on a pre-warp planet, and there's a lot of fighting with some of the savage natives. It's all very boring... until the last quarter.
It gets revealed that this is (yet another) TOS Season 2 Earth parallel, with the savages representing the US and the village people the Communists. There is no explanation given for how the aliens ended up with all the exact paraphernalia of that time on Earth, from the US flag to the American Constitution; it's all just ludicrous.
The crowning weirdness of the episode is Kirk's lauding of the American Constitution as the greatest thing ever invented. Now, I don't just not like this because I'm English; I would feel the same if the British (unwritten) Constitution was being lauded like this. I consider myself a pretty patriotic person, and I believe that every country has equal reason to celebrate themselves, but I feel it is utterly inappropriate in Star Trek for any one country or group to be held up as the ultimate shining example of civilisation. This is because Trek is meant to represent a future where everybody's come together under one banner. There's a lot to praise about the American Constitution, but it's inappropriate for it to be held up as the 'One True Way', if you will. Kirk's final admiring look at the US flag is so cringeworthily saccharine. So, yeah, this episode is boring for most of its runtime, and it certainly isn't in the end... it's much worse.
893) The Muse (1996)
DS9 4x21
Writer: Rene Echevarria, story by Rene Echevarria & Majel Barrett-Roddenberry
Director: David Livingston
The DS9 Lwaxana Troi episodes are largely not a good time, and this is the absolute worst of them. The story of her pregnancy feels so hammy and forced, and the drama with her and Odo doesn't interest me at all. She also doesn't feel like she has much of a presence in the episode, which is shocking given how she came on so wonderfully strong in TNG. The other plotline with Jake is also uninteresting. It's at least not as bad as the Lwaxana storyline, but it's still so very uninspired (you see what I did there?). Annoyingly our last Lwaxana appearance; they really should have stopped her episodes after TNG's Dark Page; that was the perfect ending for her character.
892) When the Bough Breaks (1988)
TNG 1x16
Writer: Hannah Louise Shearer
Director: Kim Manners
Gene Roddenberry did like his kiddie episodes, didn't he? The idea of 'Atlantis-but-a-planet' is interesting, but the episode wastes the concept on a tiresome kidnapping story. The kids are fine I guess, but I'd also rather not be watching them. Wesley feels kinda out-of-place among them, to be honest, considering how noticeably older he is. I will say that Picard's reaction to the abduction: 'You have just committed an act of utter barbarity!' is a superb bit of acting from Stewart, but other than that there's nothing else I'll praise about this outing.
891) Pen Pals (1989)
TNG 2x15
Writer: Melinda M Snodgrass, story by Hannah Louise Shearer
Director: Winrich Kolbe
This always feels like a short to me, despite its forty-five minute length. No time is spent building up Data and the alien kid's relationship; we just see the kid's first communication, then jump into Data confessing to Picard he's been in contact with a pre-warp individual. So I have no investment in this relationship, which is a shame because Data-plus-kid had the potential to be really sweet. They just didn't put the legwork into it. The resolution is fine.
890) Unforgettable (1998)
VOY 4x22
Writer: Greg Elliot & Michael Perricone
Director: Andrew Robinson
Got to be the most ironic title in Trek history, since this episode is extremely forgettable. It's also mind-numbingly boring: Trek does not have a good track record with single-episode romances, and this has got to be one of the worst. I feel zero connection to the guest character and zero investment in her relationship with Chakotay. The idea of a species that you forget after they've been gone for a while is intriguing, but it is wasted on this insipid romance. This was one of the longest forty-five minutes I've ever sat through.
889) Transfigurations (1990)
TNG 3x25
Writer: Rene Echevarria
Director: Tom Benko
Speaking of dull one-episode romances, here's another one. The idea of a species going through a butterfly-like transformation, that is feared and suppressed by the authorities, is again intriguing. It reminds me of the Jon Pertwee Doctor Who story The Mutants, if anyone's watched that, except it's done less well. Again, the good concept is wasted on a boring romance, this time between Beverly and her patient. This is another one that feels much longer than forty-five minutes.
888) Bread and Circuses (1968)
TOS 2x25
Writer: Gene Roddenberry & Gene L Coon
Director: Ralph Senensky
At this point in TOS Season 2, I just thought: 'Really, Mr Roddenberry? Another Earth parallel? I know you like them, but this is getting ridiculous!' Not only is this a tired repeat of an already done idea, but no explanation is given for why this planet parallels the Roman Empire. In A Piece of the Action and Patterns of Force clever reasons were given, but in this it's just presented as a weird fact. That doesn't fly with me.
And even if they had come up with another clever explanation, they have done this idea, which I don't like very much anyway, way too many times this season. I did have some minor interest in the concept of a Rome that never fell, but not enough to sustain me for fifty minutes. Boring and uninspired to the highest degree. I will say there's one really great scene between Spock and Bones in a prison cell, though, when Bones confronts Spock about how he keeps all his emotions carefully concealed.
887) How Sharper Than a Serpent's Tooth (1974)
TAS 2x5
Writer: Russell Bates & David Wise
Director: Bill Reed
Similar to Who Mourns for Adonais?, in that it gives us an omnipotent alien, who was once worshipped as a God on Earth, and has returned to take charge of his wayward children, only to ultimately discover they don't need him anymore. This is a much weaker version of that story, however, with a less sympathetic godlike character and less runtime to flesh out the idea.
The episode also takes a weird swerve halfway through, from the setting of Kukulkan's city (a nice location, I must say) to his zoo, which I find much less appealing. This episode had an idea, but it wasn't quite sure how to tell the story. Kukulkan genuinely scared me a little, though, and I did feel sorry for him when he flew off, knowing that his former worshippers had outgrown him. But again, that was done better in TOS.
886) Resurrection (1997)
DS9 6x8
Writer: Michael Taylor
Director: LeVar Burton
Michael Taylor is a curious writer for me. He has written both some of my favourite and some of my least favourite episodes, with little middle ground. This falls hard into the latter category. It's interesting to have someone from the Mirror Universe cross into the Prime Universe, rather than the other way around as normally happens, and it's doubly interesting to have that someone be Mirror Bareil. But the episode falls flat on its face: every scene is just so interminably dull, and, unlike his Prime Universe counterpart, this Bareil has no chemistry with Kira. So boring, so pedestrian, and the absolute worst of the DS9 Mirror Universe episodes.
885) The Paradise Syndrome (1968)
TOS 3x3
Writer: Margaret Armen
Director: Jud Taylor
I think this is the epitome of functional but dull. The story makes sense, the characters' motivations make sense, but that doesn't mean the episode is interesting. I do like the idea of the Preservers, beings who transplanted members of endangered peoples, here the Native Americans, to other planets, but the episode flops. Kirk's memory loss leads to a yawnworthy stay among the Native Americans, filled with predictable tensions and conflicts, and a bland romance. The Spock and Bones B-plot is also boring. I feel a little something for Miramanee's death, but only a little something.
884) Assignment: Earth (1968)
TOS 2x26
Writer: Art Wallace, story by Gene Roddenberry & Art Wallace
Director: Marc Daniels
Star Trek without the Star Trek. Deciding not to focus on the main characters for an episode isn't a bad idea in and of itself, but the characters put in their stead hold little interest for me. The same is true of the plot they work within. This was of course a backdoor pilot for a spin-off that never manifested, and maybe if it had come about I would like this episode much more, but as it stands I find the characters unintriguing and the plot uninspired. The climax is particularly poor, with about seventy different shots of the rocket going into orbit, while the characters mill about and do very little. I want me my Kirk, Spock and Bones back.
883) The Red Angel (2019)
DSC 2x10
Writer: Chris Silvestri & Anthony Maranville
Director: Hanelle M Culpepper
Down here for the same reasons as previous DSC Season 2 episodes I've put on this list. It engages heavily in the twin foul-ups of the Spock's sister storyline and the Section 31 portrayal. I hate the base concept of Burnham being Spock's sister, for reasons I've explained in my previous post, so I despise all their scenes together, that build out this relationship that I wish had never been. And Section 31 continues to be portrayed as a public wing of the Federation, with ships and resources provided by Starfleet, which is godawful.
I will say, however, that I do kinda like the sequence where Burnham has to strap herself to a chair and bare herself to the planet's toxic atmosphere in order to summon the Red Angel. And the reveal that the Angel is not herself but in fact her mother is cool. But this is still a really bad episode.
882) The Storyteller (1993)
DS9 1x13
Writer: Kurt Michael Bensmiller & Ira Steven Behr, story by Kurt Michael Bensmiller
Director: David Livingston
A really messy, weak outing. The A- and B-plots have nothing to do with each other, which isn't automatically bad, but here it just makes the episode feel untidy. Of the two, I prefer the Jake and Nog subplot; it's funny seeing them mooning over the female teenage leader of a settlement who comes to the station. Their getting in trouble to impress her is charming. The A-plot sucks, though: the whole business of O'Brien having to become the protector of this village, from an amorphous cloud villain, is just lame, and the resolution is whatever. It is funny to see O'Brien and Julian in their first episode together, though, and witnessing how much O'Brien doesn't care for the good Doctor at this point. Oh, how times will change.
881) The Arsenal of Freedom (1988)
TNG 1x20
Writer: Richard Manning & Hans Beimler, story by Maurice Hurley & Robert Lewin
Director: Les Landau
A ramshackle adventure with a medley of different storylines, all of which are underwhelming. The best is Geordi's plotline, where he asserts himself as commander of the Enterprise over the *rsehole Chief Engineer of the week, but the other two don't really have any redeeming qualities. The Riker and co storyline is repetitive and the Picard and Beverly storyline is dull. I do like that the threat is resolved when Picard agrees to make a purchase from this dead civilisation, though.
880) Move Along Home (1993)
DS9 1x9
Writer: Frederick Rappaport, Lisa Rich & Jeanne Carrigan-Fauci, story by Michael Piller
Director: David Carson
OK, so I said this wasn't the worst of DS9, but it's still really bad. Though I have to say that, after I watched this with my siblings last year, and had such fun doing so, I've never been able to see it quite so badly. It's bad, yeah, but it's so, so much fun. The best-worst bit is of course the alien hopscotch scene, and I also really have to give credit to Alexander Siddig for playing some brilliant cringey comedy with Julian. The scene where he's trying to wake himself up from a nightmare by screaming? So funny. These (sort of) praises made, this is still a stinker of an episode, with a messy plot, too-silly events, and some serious overacting from Armin Shimerman at the end. Definitely something best watched with friends or family.
Allamaraine, count to four,
Allamaraine, then three more,
Allamaraine, if you can see,
Allamaraine, you'll come with me!
879) Justice (1987)
TNG 1x7
Writer: Worley Thorne, story by Ralph Wills & Worley Thorne
Director: James L Conway
I love the basic idea of this episode: Wesley runs afoul of a law on another planet and is sentenced to death by their draconian justice system. Then Picard has to struggle with whether to obey the Prime Directive or save his life. But the episode is dragged down by some weird costuming choices and, most of all, the addition of an omnipotent entity that watches over the planet's people. This should have just been an episode about Picard struggling between duty and conscience; the addition of a mega-powerful being steals screentime from this fine idea.
878) A Simple Investigation (1997)
DS9 5x17
Writer: Rene Echevarria
Director: John T Kretchmer
Uuuuugh; another boring single-episode romance. It's an interminable chore to sit through, from beginning to end, with tired, uninspired romantic scenes and an unexciting criminalistic plot surrounding the Orion Syndicate. I also don't like how the Changelings' linking is equated with sex in that one scene. There are a few fun scenes with O'Brien, Julian and Jadzia when they're playing the spy holosuite program (Jadzia's 'Ooh, somebody stop me!', or O'Brien's 'Hi, Odo!'), but that's about it.
877) Such Sweet Sorrow Part Two (2019)
DSC 2x14
Writer: Michelle Paradise, Junny Lumet, & Alex Kurtzman
Director: Olatunde Osunsanmi
DSC wasn't merely content to introduce a sister for Spock who weakened the story of his childhood and family life. They had to make that sister so important in his life that he'd be willing to go with her into the future and leave his life behind. I hate that Kurtzman and co made this decision, as it makes everything in TOS, SNW etc feel like Spock settling for second-best, when in reality he is fulfilling his life's purpose in those series.
I also never connected with any of the DSC original characters, except for Saru, and even with him I don't feel any emotion at their grand final 23rd Century adventure to stop Control. As I've said before, this evil sentient AI story is a tired, repeated idea, and its connection to the terrible portrayal of Section 31 makes it worse. As a result of all this don't give a single crap about any of the grand-scale action in this episode, and I feel nothing for the loss of the Discovery crew to the far future. I will say that this episode did at least propel DSC into the 32nd Century, which would end up saving the series from being irredeemably awful, and it sets up the phenomenal SNW (although we didn't strictly need all this for SNW to work).
876) Vis a Vis (1998)
VOY 4x20
Writer: Robert Doherty
Director: Jesus Salvador Trevino
A vapid story about Tom feeling dissatisfied with his life on Voyager, and getting replaced by a shape-stealing alien. The concept for the alien is solid, but the execution doesn't fly. It ends up being a limp episode that drags quite a bit, with a bland character arc for Tom at its centre. Shoutout for the appearance of Dan Butler as the alien's main form, though; he played the testosterone-fuelled Bulldog Briscoe in my favourite comedy, Frasier.
That's it for now. Thank you very much for reading, and Live Long and Prosper!

11/20/2017
Log book of Det. Ryan Snow
Case #2798: The Appalachian Murders
When I woke up, I was in such a haze that I couldn’t make out where I was at first. My vision was a blur and all I could hear was the sounds of rushing water. I tried to move my limbs, but each muscle down to my little finger felt like lead weighing down on me, making it hard to breathe.
It felt like forever before the ringing in my ear was slowly swallowed out by a voice crying out from what sounded like a distance only to grow louder as it seemed to approach me from the void I had woken up in. It wasn’t until I heard my name that I recognized it was Kate’s voice, pleading and filled with tears.
I blinked away the blur, finding myself staring up at a water damaged ceiling, a single yellow light brightening the room. My head was pounding and my body still felt heavy, but I moved my head enough to turn and see where Kate was calling from. It took a moment, but I soon realized that she was lying on her back, strapped by her arms and legs to a metal table, looking to me with wide terrified eyes.
“Detective, please help!” She cried out. “Please don’t be dead! Please help me!”
“Bl-Black…Well…” I groaned out as I tried, painfully, to pick myself up off the stone floor, “Black…Well… Ah… Shit… Shit! Ms. Blackwell-“ I was gaining consciousness minute by minute as I finally took in the situation and got to my feet. However, the moment I had gotten to my feet and began running to Kate only to immediately fall back to the floor once again, my ankle getting caught by something heavy. I turned to see my ankle had been shackled to the floor by a cuff and chains. I searched my person to find my coat, along with my Glock had been taken, blood decorating my pants and sleeves. I placed a palm to my forehead to find blood when I lowered it down to look at the warm liquid slithering down from my scalp.
“Ms. Blackwell,” I returned my attention to her, examining what I could from my place on the floor, “are you alright, are you hurt?”
“I… I… I don’t… Don’t think so…” she managed to whine out.
“Where’s Mr. Raines?”
To this question, Kate looked away from me, sobbing being her only verbal response.
I went back to the shackles on my ankle and began trying to yank the chains off from the floor, but they had been well maintained and were too strong for me to simply yank out of the stone. I then quickly looked around the room to find we were in a different basement from the one in Cabin #3, though it had the same kind of layout, the table the only major difference. I also took note of the blood stains that trailed from the sides of the table and the dried pools below.
“I want my mom!” Kate cried out, her voice echoing in the empty room.
“I’ll get you to her, I will, I promise,” I assured her, trying to find something, anything to get us out of this, “do you remember how we got down here?”
“I… I… I just re-remember… Remember you g-getting knocked out… Knocked out by someone and them… Them putting a rag over me… Then everything went black… Then I woke… Woke up… H-Here…” Kate answered, trying to breathe with each sob she let out. “I… I th-thought… y-you… You were d-d-… Dead!”
“I’m not, I’m very much alive and I’m going to get you out of here and back to your parents,” I vowed as I continued looking for a way out of this situation, “we’re going to get you out of here, get you home, and we’ll make sure no one ever gets hurt here ever-“
The sound of the basement door from the splintered wooden steps cut me off. I listened as feet descended down the steps to the basement below, Kate’s ragged breaths the only other sound. The person who came down was a woman. The same exact woman from the photo I had found in her house. She looked as if she had not aged since that photo was taken, despite how long ago it seemed the photo was taken. She had the same exact long, white hair, same tired looking eyes, and same disgustingly pale skin as in that photo and on her profile picture. It was Mrs. Larson.
“Deeeeeetectiiiiiiive,” she spoke in a hoarse voice mixed with what I assumed was her own and several others, both male and female, adult and child, “youuuuuuu shouuuullld haaaaaaaaave juuuuuuusssssst giiiiiven herrrrrrr toooooo meeeeee… Youuuuuuuu diiiiiiiiid nooooooot haaaaaave toooooooo ssssssseeeee thiiiiiissssss…”
“Fuck you!” I shouted, beginning to charge at the elderly woman only to be yanked back by my shackles. “Let us go, right now!”
“Nnnnooooo,” Mrs. Larson replied harshly as she stepped over to loom over Kate.
“Stay away from her!” I barked, trying desperately to break free of my shackles.
She ignored me as she ran a shaky hand down along Kate’s trembling face. “Ooooooooohhhhh, Kaaaaaate… Sweeeeet, sweeeeeeeet, Kaaaaaaaaaate…” Mrs. Larson cooed as she went on stroking Kate’s wet cheek. “Doooooo noooooooot crrrrrrryyyyyyy, dooooooonnnnnn’t thiiiiiiiiiinnnnk oooooofff iiiiiiiit aaaaaaaassssss dyyyyyyyyiiiiinnnnng, thiiiiiiiiinnnk ooooooooffff iiiiiiit aaaaaassssss ssssssssaaaaaaaaaviiiiiiinnng aaaaaannnnoooootherrrrrrrrr liiiiiiiiife.”
“I-I… I d-don’t… Don’t under-understand… w-what th-that… That m-means…” Kate cried, her hands gripping the sides of the metal table beneath her, “P-Please, d-don’t… Don’t kill me… L-Let… Let us-us go!”
“Nnnnnoooooo,” Mrs. Larson answered in the same harshness she used on me, “IIIIIIIII neeeeeeeed youuuuuuuuuu,” she then shot a death glare my way through tired, silver eyes, “aaaaaaaannnnnnd heeeeeeeeee’ssssssss beeeeeeeeeennnnnn nnnnnnnoooooooothiiiiiiiiinnnnnng buuuuut aaaaaa thooooooorrrrrrnnnn iiiiiiinnnnn myyyyyyyyy ssssssssiiiiiiiide siiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnccccccce youuuuuu eeeeeessssssscaaaaaaped meeeeeeee.” She then looked back to Kate with a softer look. “Aaaaaaaassssss fffffoooooorrrrr whaaaaaaaat youuuuuuu caaaaaannnn’t uuuuuunnnnnnderrrrrrssssssstaaaaaaannnnnnd, IIIIIIIIII nnnnnneeeeeeed yourrrrrrrrrr heaaaaaaaarrrrrt tooooooo ssssssssaaaaaavvvvvvve myyyyyyy ssssssiiiiiiiisssssssterrrrrrrr.”
“The fuck does that mean?” I demanded, still trying to vain to pull my ankle from the chains. “How the hell will Kate’s heart save your sister?”
“Diiiiiiiiidnnnnnn’t nnnnnnneeeeeeed toooooo beeeee Kaaaaaaate’sssssss,” admitted Mrs. Larson, “buuuuuuuut sssshhhhhheeeeee hiiiiiiiiid theeeeee ooooooootherrrrr giiiiirrrrrrllllll ffffffrrrrroooooommmmm mmmmmeeeeee.”
“S-Son… Sonja…” Kate sniffed, the tears still streaming down her face.
“IIIIIIII oooooooonnnnnlllllyyyyy neeeeed fffffffeeeeeemmmmmaaaaallllle,” Mrs. Larson dismissed Ms. Greymoore’s name, “ffffffeeeeeeemmmmmaaaaaallllle heaaaaaaaarrrrrrrtsssss toooooo rrrrrrreeeeeetuuuuurrrrrrnnnnn mmmmmmyyyyy ssssiiiiissssssterrrrrrrrr toooooo theeeeeeee giiiiirrrrrllllll ssssshhhhhheeeee uuuuuuuusssssed tooooo beeeeeee.”
“That’s a fucking joke right?” I asked. “The hell makes you think eating a female heart will turn your sister back into a human woman? Have you seen what’s happened to your sister?”
“IIIIIIIII knnnnnnnooooooow beeeeeeecaaaauuuuusssssse iiiiiiiiiiit wooooooorrrrrked ooooooonnnnn mmmmmeeeeee,” Mrs. Larson explained, “IIIIIIIIIII waaaaaasssss aaaaaaablllllllle toooooo reeeeeeetaaaaiiiiiinnnnnn thiiiiiiiiiisssssss huuuuuummmmmmaaaaaannnnn fffffffooooorrrrrrmmmm ffffffrrrrrooooommmm eeeeeaaaaatiiiiiinnnnnng theeeeeeee heaaaaaaaaarrrrrtsssss, sssssspecifffffficaaaaaaallllllyyyyyy fffffffeeeeeemmmmmaaaaallllleeee sssssssooooooo IIIIIIIIII mmmmmmaaaaaayyyyyy rrrrrreeeeetuuuurrrrrnnnnn toooo beeeeeiiiiinnnng theeeeeeee giiiiiirrrrrrrllllll IIIIIII uuuuuuusssssed toooooooo beeeeeee.”
“You were dead,” I pointed out, “they found your body up here, you were buried.”
“Theeeeeessssssse sssshhhhheeeeeellllllsssss arrrrrrre mmmmmeeeeeerrreeeellllyyy veeeeeessssssellllllssssss ffffffoooooorrrrrr theeeeeeee sssssspiiiiirrrrriiiiiitsssss weeeee hiiiiiiiiiiide beeeeeneeeeaaaaattthhhh,” Mrs. Larson responded, finally turning her gaze to me, “IIIIIIII haaaaaaad tooooooo maaaake peeeopllllle beeeelieevvvve IIIIIII haaaaaad diiiiiiied tooooo keeeeeep frrrrroooommm theeeee poooooollllliiiiicccce ffffrrrrrrooooommmm pooookiiiiiinnnng aaaaarrrrouuuuuunnnnd aaaaannnnnd rrrrruuuiiinnnnniiinnnng eeeevvvveeerrrrryyythiiiiinnnng.”
“So, let me just get this whole thing straight,” I began as I started rubbing my temples, "when you and your sister starting into… Whatever the hell that thing you call your sister is-“
“Ooooouuuurrrrr sssssspiiiiiirrrrrriiiiiit,” Mrs. Larson corrected.
“Whatever!” I shot. “You found out that eating female hearts turns you two back into human women and to keep police from suspecting you, you pretended to be dead and… What? Just hope a shitty real estate agency would buy your property and you could just… Kill people, people with lives and families outside the mountains?”
“Thaaaaaaaat iiiiiiisssss cooooorrrrrreeeeect…” Mrs. Larson admitted, narrowing her eyes at me.
That’s when I began laughing hysterically, holding my sides that hurt with each harsh breath of a laugh I took. Both Mrs. Larson and Kate looked to me as if I had lost my mind and at this point I was starting to believe I had. Everything I had seen and heard about this entire case would put anyone in the looney bin. And I’m the damn fool who dug too deep into something he had nothing to do with.
“Whaaaaaat’s ssssoooo ffffuuunnnny?” Growled Mrs. Larson, stepping around Kate to stand between us.
“I don’t know what’s fucking funnier, honestly,” I chuckled, running a hand through my hair, “the fact that you thing people won’t be poking around even more when they discover not only is Blackwell missing, but so is a detective and escaped convict all of whom now have ties to these fucking mountains and those cabins, or that you thing I’m more afraid of what you plan on doing with me more than I am when her father finds out I got her in this situation in the first place!”
“Heeeeeee wooooonnnnn’t beeeee aaaaabllllle toooooo doooo aaaaaannnnnyyyyythiiiiiinnnng aaaaaaafffffterrrrrrr IIIIIIIII’mmmmm dooooooonnnne wiiiiiiiith booooooth ooooooooffffff youuuuuuuuu,” Mrs. Larson hissed as she inched closer, “fffffffiiiiiiirrrrrrssssst, IIIIIIIII waaaaaannnnnt youuuuuuuu toooo waaaaaatch mmmmmeeeee kiiiiiiillllll herrrrrrr,” she turned her head to look to Kate who was now just shaking, her eyes seemingly gone dry from the crying, Mrs. Larson then looked back to me, “sssssseeeeecooooonnnnd, IIIIIIII wiiiiillllll ssssssaaaaave youuuuu fffffooooorrrr mmmmmmyyyyy sssssiiiiiisssssterrrrr, oooooonnnnne heeeeaaaaart wiiiiilllll nnnnoooot ssssssaaaaaatissssfffffyyyy herrrr huuuuuunnnnnger.” She took another step. “Uuuuuuuunnnnnllllliiiiiike sssssssoooooommmme ssssssiiiiiibllllliiiiiiinnnnnngsssss, IIIIIIIII caaaaaarrrre aaaaaaboooouuuuut mmmmmmyyyyy ffffffaaaammmmiiiiilllllyyyyyy.”
She stared into my eyes, expecting a reaction and while my blood did somewhat boil at the accusatory statement, I didn’t fully understand what she was getting at. Not until she used that voice. Not until she relived that day with those two familiar child-like voices.
“Screw you, Liam!” She cried out in a voice I remember from my childhood. “I hope you drop dead!”
“Stop.” I demanded.
“Piss off, Ryan!” She shot back in a second boy’s voice.
“I said stop!” I began shouting.
“Help me, Ryan! Please, help me! I’m sorry! Please, Lucky Dime, help me!”
I then lunged toward her, reaching my hands out toward her neck only to be stopped by the shackles as she swiftly, almost without even moving, stepped just out of my reach.
“Fucking bitch!” I screamed out.
“If only you really cared about me, Lucky Dime,” sighed Mrs. Larson as she turned and began making her way to the side of the room where a cart stood in the shadows. She pulled it over to Kate’s side, the cart covered in rusted medical tools.
“P-Please,” Kate wheezed, “p-p-please… I… I d-d-don’t w-want… Want t-to d-d… D-Die, I… I w-w-want m-m-m… My m-mom!”
“Dooooonnn’t woooorrrrryyyyy,” Mrs. Larson soothed, using that mix of different voices, “mmmmmmaaaayyyyybeeee sheeee wiiiillll cooooommmme loooookinnnng ffffooooorrrr yooouuuuu aaaaannnnnd sheeeeeee caaaaannnnn joooooiiiiiinnnn youuuuuuu.”
Kate began to sob, begging and pleading for Mrs. Larson to let her go, thrashing around in her restraints. Telling the older woman that there was no saving her sister and that she was too far gone for this sick ritual to work anymore. I tried to yank at the chains once more, trying to loosen it at least enough to break free and grab at Mrs. Larson.
“Rrrrrrreeeeellllllaaaaax,” Mrs. Larson ordered as she began filling a syringe with some kind of clear liquid from a small bottle, “yoooouuuuuu woooooonnnn’t eeeeeveeennn fffffeeeellll iiiiiiit, thiiiissssss wiiiiiillllll puuuuuut youuuuu toooo ssssssllllllleeeeeep aaaaaannnnnnd wheeeeeennnnnn youuuuuu waaaaaake uuuuuuuup, youuuuuuu’lllllll beeee iiiiiinnnnnn heeeeeaaaaaaveeeennnnn… Uuuuuunnnnnnnllllllessssss youuuuuuu weeeerrrrrrre aaaaaa haaaaaarrrrrlllllooooooot, iiiiiiinnnnnn whiiiiiiiich caaaaaassssssseeeee, mmmmmaaaayyyy Goooooood haaaaaaaave mmmmmmmmerrrrrrrcccccyyyyy ooooonnnnn youuuuuur ssssssoooouuuuullllll… Aaaaannnnnd baaaaaaasssssed ooooonnnn hoooooow youuuuuu drrrrressss aaaaannnnnd theeeee coooommmmpaaaannnnyyyy youuuuuu keeeeeep,” She added as she eyed me, “IIIIIII ssssssaaaaaayyyy youuuuu haaaaaave aaaaa lllllloooooot ooooooffff fooooooorrrrgiiiiiviiiiinnnnng tooooo dooooo.”
Kate continued to cry as Mrs. Larson pushed the needle of the syringe into her arm, pushing down on the plunger as it pierced the flesh. Kate’s loud screams soon turned quieter and her red eyes began to glaze over, but she continued to stay awake, tightening her grip on the table and still begging to be let go.
“IIIIII waaaaannnnt youuuuu toooo waaaaatch, Detective,” Mrs. Larson spat out my title in Mr. Blackwell’s voice, “IIIII waaaaannnnnt youuuuu toooo waaaaatch herrrrrr fffffaaaaaade aaaaaannnnnnd mmmmmeeeee rrrrreeeemmmmooooove heerr heeeaaaarrrrrt toooooo ffffffeeeeeed tooooo mmmmmmyyyyyy ssssssiiiiiiiissssssterrrrrr,” she then pulled out a recorder, “theeeeennnnnn wheeeeeennnnn IIIIIII ssssssuuuuummmmoooooonnnnn herrrrrrr aaannnnd sheeeee fffffiiiinnnniiiishessssss oooooofffffff heeeerrrrr heeeaaaaarrrrrt, youuuuuuu’llllllll beeeeee neeeeeext.”
“Fuck you,” I snarled, “I hope you and your sister burn.”
“IIIIIIIII’mmmmm gooooonnnnnaaaaa gooooo aaaaallllllerrrrrrt mmmmmyyyyy ssssssiiiiiiissssterrrrrr,” Mrs. Larson turned and began making her way to the basement steps, “ssssseeee youuuuu boooooth ffffffoooooorrrr diiiiiinnnnnnerrrrrrr.”
She then pressed the play button on her recorder and a small, little girl’s voice echoed in the room before Mrs. Larson vanished up the steps.
“I’m here… I’m here… I’m here…”
Then the door slammed shut.
“De… Tec… Tive…” Kate squeaked out, her breathing slowing.
“Stay awake, Blackwell,” I ordered her gently, looking around frantically for anything to get us both out of this alive, “I’ll get us out of this, I promise, just stay awake, we’ll get out of here, I just need-“
“I’m… S… Sorry…” she breathed out. “I’m… So… Sorry… For… Get… Getting… You… In… To.. This…”
“No, no, this is not your fault!” I assured her. “That psychotic bitch got us both into this shit and I won’t stop until I get us out and put her and her fucking sister are six feet under!”
“W…Wha… What… H… Hap… Happened… To… To L… Liam…?”
I stopped struggling with the chains and turned to look to Kate. Her head was turned to me, her face wet, hands clenching as hard as they could to the table beneath her, the light in her eyes slowly fading second by second. She was trying desperately to stay awake. The medication Mrs. Larson taking hold of her as the minutes ticked by.
I dropped the chains that were in my hands, looking away from her, wanting to stare at anything other than another person I had failed.
“He was killed,” I answered, “we were fishing at a lake nearby… Lake Gaagige… We got into a really stupid ass fucking fight about how which fishing pole we were going to use. I wanted to use our dad’s, but Liam was older and said only men could use dad’s fishing pole… I told him… To drop dead and stormed off… When I got home, my parents dragged me back to the lake and scolded me for leaving him…” I trailed off, swallowing all the tears and screams I’d bottled up since that day. “When… We found… Him… The autopsy… Said he was mauled by a bear… I’ve blamed myself for leaving him there alone… For letting him die and getting killed like that… The last thing I ever told him was to drop dead… I was a shitty brother and now I’m a shitty detective…”
“Is… Is he… Why… You became… A… Detective…?”
I took a deep breath and swallowed the tears again. “No, Blackwell,” I answered, “he’s not why I became a detective… I already knew what had killed him… It was my fault… If I hadn’t been such a brat and stormed off… He might still be alive… And now… What that bitch said…” I replayed Liam’s screams that escaped Mrs. Larson’s mouth. “I’m starting to think I’m getting what I deserve. Karma’s back to kick my ass…”
“H… How… Old…?”
“I was six… Liam was eight…”
“N… N… Not your… F… Fault…”
I turned to look to Kate, her eyes on mine, however faded.
“Y… You were… Only… A k… Kid…”
I took another intake of what little air there was down in that basement. I had spent years trying to convince myself of the same thing, but those moments never got easier for me when those thoughts returned.
“I think you’re just being nice,” I laughed painfully, “but I’m afraid I- and my folks- don’t share the same sentiment.”
I was staring down at where the chains were coming from in the ground, Kate not saying a word for over a couple of minutes. I spun to see if she had fallen asleep and immediately tried to find out how to wake her up again. However, once I our eyes met, I saw that she was still fighting sleep, the last of her tears rolling down across the bridge of her nose and into her hair.
“I… I… I had… Had a c… Crush… O… On… J… Jasper…” she confessed, her voice getting quieter and higher. “P… Paul and… And Son… Sonja knew… I never… Never c… Cared f… For Luke… But I’m… Sure… S… Sonja t… Told him…” she looked like she was going to sob again. “I… I never g… Got the… Ch… Chance… T… To tell J… Jasper… I… Was… Scared… He… He and… P… Paul were friends… And I… I kn… Knew… How P… Paul f… Felt… A… About m… Me… I… I did… Didn’t wa… Want to… R… Ruin… Anyth… Anything…” She took a gulp of air. “I… I ha… Hated L… Luke… I… A… Always… Kn… Knew… He… He was a… Player… B… But Sonja… Said… Said she was hap… Happy… So… So I did… Didn’t wa… Want to g… Get in… H… Her way… B… But Luke d… Didn’t l… Like h… How cl… Close… We… Were… I d… Didn’t w… Want him to make… Make her th… Think I… I was l… Leading her o… On… T… To get them… To b… Break up… Th… Then… That n… Night… Sh… She w… Wanted to… To leave…” She let out two pained gasps of breath. “I… I let them down… I let them all down… Luke pro… Probably thought… Thought I w… Was the one who… Who f… Filled Sonja’s mind… With thoughts of… Of him ch… Cheating… Th… Then I… I got them… All killed…
I… I didn’t deserve them, d… Detective…” she went on, looking away from me to stare up at the water damaged ceiling, “I… I… I was a… Terrible… Terrible friend…”
“Did you read their guest book entries?” I asked.
“N… No… D… Didn’t w… Want to… To r… Read any… Anything p… Private…” Kate answered.
“Jasper didn’t blame you,” I assured her, remembering what he had written in his entry during his time watching Mrs. Larson just outside the cabin, “even when he heard the voices- when he heard Mrs. Larson- telling him to, he didn’t. I don’t think the others blamed you either. You didn’t do anything wrong, Ms. Blackwell, there’s no way you could have known any of this would happen.”
“K… Kate…”
“What?”
“C… Call… Call me… Kate…”
“Aright, Kate,” I let out what little laughter I had left inside me, “so long as we’re the last people we’ll be chatting with, call me Ryan.”
“R… Ryan…”
“If we at all live through this, I’m going to need a long vacation after this,” I said as I turned to look at my shackles again, looking around myself to try finding anything to Get free since a vacation sounded like something to die for at that moment, “do you know any good vacation spots I can book for the fall?”
“Y… You’re… You’re a… Dick…” Kate struggled to laugh.
“I also enjoy pineapple on pizza,” I winked as I reached down to my ankle, ready to break it just to taste that sweet combination of tomato sauce and fruit.
“G… God… I… I c… Can’t… Believe… I th… Thought y… You w… Were c… Cute…”
I sat down on the floor, grabbing my ankle with both my hands. Needing to hype myself up enough to do what I was going to do, I began removing my shoe and sock from the foot, rubbing and squeezing my way up and down the ankle to my toes. I had never broken a bone in my life before this and I definitely never thought I’d do it of my own volition, but this was a desperate time and it definitely called for desperate…
“Wait what?” I turned to look to Kate, finally registering what she had said.
However, just before I could be sure of what I heard, the sound of a hunting rifle going off just above our heads right before we heard the door to the basement swing open and immediately be slammed shut. Both Kate and I turned to see someone stumble down the wooden steps, his clothes torn and body scratched and cut to a nearly deadly degree. I was even shocked he was still breathing.
“M… Mr… R… Raines…?” Kate gasped out.
“What’s left of me at least,” Mr. Raines grumbled as he limped over to Kate and quickly began undoing her straps to the table, “damn thing almost ripped my head off, but one swing of the barrel to its eye and I was able to get away… Can’t say it didn’t do its damage though… I’m… Getting really fucking hungry…”
He shook his head violently before limping over to me. He then raised an eyebrow at me when he saw how I was positioned still on the floor with a bare foot in my hands shackled to the floor.
“I… I was… I… I thought you were-“ I stammered.
“I am,” Mr. Raines interrupted, “at least, I’m on my way there anyway.” He then retrieved my Glock from his back pocket. “I don’t know what that thing did to me, but I’m not gonna make it out of this alive, or the way I came in. It’s a massacre out there by the way. Lot of men in blue bodies out there… Very… Hard to ignore… Sure more will be on their way. So.”
With that, Mr. Raines pointed at my chains and pulled the trigger on my clock, barely giving me time to cover my ears as the sound rung out loudly in the basement. I shook my head, trying to undo the blurry and ringing side effects of the sound of a gun going off near your head. I gave the older man a glare before standing and snatching my Glock from his hands. That’s when I saw Kate shifting herself to the side of the metal table she was no longer tied to, trying to get her limbs to comply with her to help her off and on to the floor.
I ran over and grabbed her just as she nearly stumbled face first to the floor and lifted her up to her feet, her body heavy with lack of keeping herself up.
“Do you think you can walk?” I asked, trying to keep her on her feet.
“I… I don’t… I…” Kate stammered as she tried to push herself off of me while also using using me as a crutch until she could stand on her own. However, she didn’t seem to be able to put any kind of pressure on her legs without falling down.
“Kate?” A girl’s voice called out from above us.
Feeling Kate shudder, I realized that it must have been the sound of Sonja’s voice and Mrs. Larson was using her to keep Kate from running. I quickly swung my arm down behind her knees, pressing the other down on her back as I lifted her up off the floor, my Glock at the ready as I kept it pointed in front of me while my arm held up Kate’s knees.
“She must have heard the gunshots,” I pointed out, “how’d you get past her in the first place?”
“I set the other cabins on fire,” Mr. Raines answered as if it were the simplest of answers, “I had to distract her somehow and give those bodies she’d been eating a better fate than becoming her shit.”
“Are you planning on setting this place on fire too?” I asked.
“‘Course I am!” Mr. Raines exclaimed, seemingly offended I’d even ask. “I already doused it in gasoline, I ain’t wasting all that time!”
“Kate!” Sonja’s voice cried out, getting closer to the basement door. “Are you seriously leaving me here to die alone again!”
“Please… Make it… Stop…” Kate sniffed as she gripped my shirt and burying her face into the fabric.
“Let’s get you two out of here.” Mr. Raines began leading the way to the basement stairs, cocking his rifle as he did so.
“What about you?” I asked, immediately following after him.
Mr. Raines didn’t answer as he stomped up the stairs and kicked the door open to the first floor of the cabin. The stench of the gasoline he had spilled hitting me harshly in my face.
“Kate!” Sonja’s voice, along with a different crescendo of male voices shrieked out as Mrs. Larson appeared from the corner of the hallway where the basement was located.
“Leighton?” A different woman’s voice asked the moment the old woman’s eyes spotted Mr. Raines. I then watched in both shock and confusion as it almost looked like the very skin on the woman melted off to reveal a much younger woman. The woman I recognized as Bonnie Collins. “Leighton… Love is that you?”
Mr. Raines kept his rifle on the vision of the woman he once loved before her murder, but didn’t move or speak.
“Darling, I’ve missed you so much!” The fake Bonnie cried out as she began making her way to Mr. Raines with arms open wide to hug him.
Mr. Raines then lifted his gun up higher, placing his finger on the trigger which caused the vision to stop in her place.
“Leighton?” The fake Bonnie asked. “Baby, it’s me… Bun-Bun… Don’t you recognize me…?” She began to tear up.
“You’re not my Bunny,” Mr. Raines growled before he shot once at the woman.
The fake Bonnie swiftly dodged the bullet, an inhuman hiss coming from an unhinged mouth, revealing a row of long, sharp teeth. The skin of Bonnie then melted off to reveal another woman, a lot younger than the first one it intimidated. The face of one of the victims upon being brought on this case.
“Kate,” the fake Sonja called out, “Kate, what are you doing? Who are these men? Why are they trying to hurt me?”
Kate let out a sobbing gasp, her nails digging into my shoulder with her arm wrapped around my neck.
“Didn’t I suffer enough?” The fake Sonja asked. “First my boyfriend and now you? Why don’t you want to be with me anymore?”
“Shut up!” Kate demanded. “You’re not Sonja! You killed her, you killed all of them! I don’t care what happens to me, but I’m not letting their memories end with you!”
Kate then snatched my Glock from my hand under her legs and shot directly at the fake Sonja’s head. Again the shot missed as the fake vision of the girl slithered out of the way, a frustrated growl of a dog and human escaping it’s mouth. It then zipped to the side, cowering with its back to us on the floor.
“Lucky dime…” A child’s voice then took over. The vision’s skin melting now to a much smaller figure. “Is this what you want? To kill me all over again?” He turned to look up at me, Liam’s face forever eight-years-old staring up at me. “It’s no wonder mommy and daddy hate you now… You were always a shitty brother… Now, I’m gonna starve to death because you’d rather help a couple of strangers.”
“I’m sorry, Liam,” I replied, everyone, including the fake Liam looking to me in surprise, “I left you alone out here and that’s what got you killed by that thing out there and I’m sorry. But, if I’d stayed it may have been both of us and then mom and dad would have no one left to blame but each other. If you had left and I was the one killed, you’d probably be in my shoes instead. I’m sorry for letting you get killed, but I’m gonna make up for it now.”
I then took my Glock back from Kate and pointed it to the vision of Liam.
“Good bye, Liam.”
I shot the gun once again, missing the creature again, however, this time I just kept shooting, Mr. Raines following after. Our different bullets just kept firing, the thing dodging and trying to get closer to us. The creature screeched out at us in a myriad of different voices both familiar and unknown. It wasn’t until one shot from my Glock struck the creatures shoulder and Mr. Raines’ rifle struck its head when the skins of everyone it was trying to turn into all melted off, revealing Mrs. Larson once again.
However, this time, she looked shriveled, older than she looked before. Her face looked deformed, beginning to grow furry, her eyes growing nothing but red, no irises, no pupils, just red. Her hair grew longer, branches like antlers growing painfully out from her skull, breaking the skin as they grew larger. The lower half of her face grew elongated, turning into that of a muzzle of fangs and a drooling mouth.
“You… All… Have no rrrrrrriiiiiight!” A different, unknown voice snarled out from what used to be Mrs. Larson. “People liiiiiike you all… Abandoned me and myyyyyyyyy sister!” The fur growing around this thing grew out short and shaggy, the cloths it was using melting off with the skin and flesh it was wearing. It now didn’t look anything like a human woman. It now took the form of a large wolf mixed with that of a deer, it’s body dog-like with hooves, antlers, and a long, scraggly tail. “You lot abandoned us here! You left us all here to diiiiiiiie!”
Guilt was weighing down on me with each syllable it was growling. Kate looked away from it, burying her face in my neck as Mr. Raines lowered his rifle.
“Nooooow, you’re bringing more here to just leave and let die out here!” It went on, it’s horrifying, broken body shuddering. “Why let them just vanish and die up here when they can bring people like my sister and I back? Give me Kate’s heart and fix what you threeeeeeeeee failed!”
Mr. Raines then handed over his rifle to Kate, placing it down on her stomach as her hands were still wrapped around my neck. The older man made his way over to stand over the thing, its neck creaking like a rusted door as it turned its wolf-like head to look up at him.
“Leighton…” Bonnie’s voice came from the creature. “Give mmmmeeeee her heart aaaannnnd we can be togetherrrrr again… If you eat the deeeeeetective’s we can saaaaaave you tooooooo…”
“My Bunny’s dead,” Mr. Raines told it as he dug in his pocket and took out a carton of matches, “and so am I.”
“You’d burn your wife?” A mix of Bonnie and Mrs. Larson’s voices shrieked as it glared at the match he took from the match box.
“You’re not my wife,” Mr. Raines told it, “and I’ll never see her again.”
“Fooooooool,” Mr. Larson’s voice chuckled, “you’llllllll killllllll us both!”
“With the shit I’ve done in my life, I know you’re taking me to Hell with you,” Mr. Raines growled back as he struck the match on the box, “so I’m sure as fuck not afraid to burn here on Earth with you!”
Mr. Raines then dropped the match to the floor right before the creature and everything around the two of them immediately went up in flames, the fur of the creature catching quickly and engulfing it. An agonized shriek echoed out all around us, the creature thrashing in the fire it had gotten swallowed up in. Mr. Raines then grabbed it by it’s long, furry throat and swung it down back flat the floor, jumping to pin it down.
“Get out!” Mr. Raines cried out to me. “Leave here!”
Not needing to be told twice, I held onto Kate tightly and bolted past the two burning bodies, jumping over the fire as it began growing fast throughout the cabin. I quickly got to the front door and stopped to look back to see Mr. Raines fighting the creature and preventing it from coming after us, it begging for me to bring Kate back and that it would die without her.
“I’ll clear your name,” I called back, trying not to reel back in horror as I saw Mr. Raines skin begin to melt off, “I’ll let people know you didn’t kill Bonnie!”
“I’ll let people know you didn’t… Kill… Liam!” Mr. Raines’ voice called back, him thrashing around with Mrs. Larson as he said my brother’s name in my voice.
I turned back and kicked the front door open, rushing Kate out of the burning cabin. I ran until I got far enough from the smoke, turning back to see all three cabins now on fire, the area around them all ablaze. The only place untouched was Mrs. Larson’s house, all the evidence remaining. I could hear sirens in the distance coming closer. The sounds of shouts from the surviving officers sounding much closer.
“I’m here… I’m here… I’m here…”
I looked to the front porch of Mrs. Larson’s house where her recorder continued to call out for her sister. I set Kate down at the base of a nearby tree and ran to snatch the recorder, shutting it off. I searched around, looking for any signs of Prudence, but it appeared that the fire and the sounds of sirens and voices had scared her off. I ran back to Kate, her eyes closed and her not responding to me calling to her, but after checking her pulse and breathing, I found that the medication Mrs. Larson had given her had finally taken over and she was now fast asleep, the rifle Mr. Raines gave her still sitting on her rhythmically rising and falling stomach.
Letting out a sigh of relief, I leaned against the same tree I set Kate down on and slid down to the ground next to her. The first two cabins were already practically nothing but ash, the last still blazing as I heard the slowly fading screams of Mrs. Larson and Mr. Raines coming from inside.
When the screaming ended all together, the smoke turning blacker as it rose from the flames, I got to my feet and took out my pack of cigarettes as I approached the fires, staying far enough away not to get burned. I opened the pack up before stopping myself as I reached for one of the ten remaining cigarettes inside. I then flung the entire carton into the fires without taking one.
“Save one for me down there, you old bastard,” I told Mr. Raines before making my way back to Kate’s side.
It wasn’t long before the remaining officers found us, looking in confusion at the fires and to me with a sleeping victim in a homicide case on the ground. I told them we’d need to call an ambulance for Kate and that we needed to keep the flames from getting to Mrs. Larson’s house as it held evidence on the case. One officer retrieved his radio and called for an ambulance while a group ran to the house and another went to try controlling the fire as best they could by yanking out any bushes near by and throwing them away from the area around the house.
Luckily, the fire trucks were called long before the fire spread too far, residence noticing it practically the moment Mr. Raines set the first cabin on fire.
As I sat there, keeping Kate held up against the tree we sat under, I listened to the crackling of the fire, the sirens of fast approaching fire trucks and the ambulance, and the sounds of distance, coyote, almost human, howling.

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The Connection Between Diabetes and Oral Health

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Special Considerations for Diabetic Dental Care

1. Monitor Blood Sugar Levels

Keeping your blood sugar levels under control is the first step in preventing oral health problems. Consistently high blood sugar can weaken the body’s ability to fight infections, including those in the mouth. Regularly monitor your blood sugar levels and follow your doctor’s advice to keep them within the target range.

1. Regular Dental Check-ups

Frequent dental visits are essential for early detection and management of potential issues. Diabetics should see their dentist at least twice a year for specialized cleanings and checkups. Inform your dentist about your diabetes so they can provide the best care tailored to your needs. Dentist in kalyani nagar

1. Comprehensive Oral Hygiene Routine

Adopting a thorough oral hygiene routine is crucial for preventing dental problems. Brush your teeth at least twice a day with fluoride toothpaste and floss daily to remove plaque and food particles from between the teeth and under the gums. Consider using an antibacterial mouthwash to reduce the risk of gum disease.

1. Look Out for Symptoms

Be vigilant about any changes or symptoms in your mouth. Mutual symptoms of gum disease include red, swollen, or bleeding gums, persistent bad breath, and loose teeth. If you notice any of these symptoms, schedule an appointment with your dentist immediately. Dentist in kalyani nagar

1. Manage Dry Mouth

If you experience dry mouth, there are several steps you can take to alleviate the discomfort and reduce the risk of dental problems:

• Drink plenty of water throughout the day. Dentist in kalyani nagar
• Chew sugar-free gum or suck on sugar-free candies to stimulate saliva creation.
• Use a humidifier at night to keep the air soggy. Dentist in kalyani nagar
• Avoid caffeine, tobacco, and alcohol, which can exacerbate dry mouth.

1. Quit Smoking

Smoking is harmful to everyone’s oral health, but it’s especially dangerous for diabetics. It increases the risk of gum disease, dry mouth, and oral cancer. Quitting smoking can meaningfully improve your oral and overall health.

Tips for Maintaining Optimal Oral Health

1. Choose the Right Dental Products

Select dental care products that cater to your specific needs. For example, toothpaste designed for sensitive teeth can help if you experience discomfort. Electric toothbrushes can be more effective at eliminating plaque than manual toothbrushes. Fluoride rinses can strengthen your teeth and help prevent decay.

1. Maintain a Balanced Diet

A healthy diet plays a crucial role in managing diabetes and maintaining oral health. Limit your intake of sugary and acidic foods, which can lead to tooth decay and gum disease. Instead, focus on a balanced diet with fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains. Dentist in kalyani nagar

1. Hydration

Staying hydrated is essential for overall health and helps combat dry mouth. Drink water regularly and avoid sugary drinks, which can increase the risk of cavities.

1. Stress Management

Stress can negatively impact both diabetes and oral health. High-stress levels can lead to poor blood sugar control and unhealthy habits like neglecting oral hygiene. Practice stress management techniques such as regular exercise, meditation, and adequate sleep. Dentist in kalyani nagar

1. Medication Management

Some medications for diabetes can have side effects that affect oral health. For example, certain drugs may cause dry mouth. Discuss with your doctor or dentist about managing these side effects effectively. They may recommend saliva substitutes or other treatments to help.

1. Educate Yourself

Stay informed about the latest research and recommendations for diabetes management and oral health. Knowledge is a powerful tool in preventing and managing complications. Attend diabetes education programs and read reliable sources to keep yourself updated. Dentist in kalyani nagar

Conclusion

For diabetics, maintaining good oral health requires a combination of diligent self-care and professional guidance. By understanding the connection between diabetes and dental health and implementing these special considerations and tips, you can reduce the risk of complications and enjoy a healthy mouth and body.
Remember, managing your diabetes effectively and taking proactive steps toward oral hygiene can go a long way in ensuring your overall well-being. Dentist in Kalyani nagar
Regular dental visits at the best dentist in Pune, a comprehensive oral hygiene routine, and a healthy lifestyle are the pillars of excellent dental care for diabetics. Take charge of your oral health today and experience the benefits of a confident smile and a healthier life.

This is a sequal to u/uktabi's Yulpa GF one shot, since he seems to LAZY to make a sequel. (that's a joke, god I'm so tired its almost 3am as I write this god fucking dammit why did i do this to myself)
He was originally inspired by u/FrostedScales' art., (God, please make a cover for this I want one so fucking baaaaaaad)
​
I make my way into my house, a small part of me is hoping for relief from the harsh Savannah heat. Only to be brought back to my unpleasant reality of my house being just as hot and dry as the outside.
Ugh, why do I willingly live in this hellish place without AC?
I hear mewing and tapping hooves getting closer, a small blood red calf comes running towards me and runs circles around me. I extend my free hand and she readily forces her head into it, wrapping her tongue, upper and lower lip around it to return the gesture of connection. The barbs irritate my skin, but she's old enough now not to unintentionally draw blood.
I look down at the pleading eye, happy to see me again.
Ah, right. While I'm in hell she's in paradise, I guess I’ll have to suck it up for her.
I give her a closed lip smile and rub her ears.
“Hi honey, how was school?” She inflates her nostrils and begins to talk to me in learned English. It is… unsettling how accurately she can mimic almost anyone with only her nose. I am reminded of that fact as she speaks in my voice.
“Good, bunny lunch was.” I forced down an indignant laugh at the child's broken grammar. It seems Yulpa are able to understand words, but grammar doesn't seem important to them. I remember how off puttingly dense their spoken language is, they can communicate in infra sound over vast distances. Their phrases were spoken in single words, so a single “word” was a bit of a conversation. Like “Over the river” or ”up the tree is food.”
It was insane how dense their language was.
“Do you know if mom is back?” The little head in my hand nodes while still wrapped around me.
“Garden she eating is.”
I rub her head one more time before I make my way out the back door. The child quickly scampered off to do who knows what.
Out in the back I see her, draped in golden jewelry, with a well maintained main, green cloth and jewels to accentuate her natural deep red coat. She was laying down with what looked like roughage in her maw. She was absentmindedly chewing and staring off into space.
I walked over and rested myself against her side, I let her breathing rise and lower me. Being in the presence of such a large person really made me feel how insanely varied our body masses were. Despite being married and … constituting it, we had to sleep in separate beds, lest she roll onto me and I die of suffocation or all my bones breaking.
I absentmindedly picked some grass and twirled it around. “So, what's wrong?” She rolled her eyes towards me.
“Hungry.” She spoke in perfect English, I looked down at the grass I began to weave together.
“You need to get the cure.” She raised her massive head ever so slightly. “No, betrayal, life lived one way. Too late, already sacrificed too many.” She blows out her nose.
I grab more grass and weave it into the mass I was creating. “I thought I was too old, set in my ways to be married when we met. But now look at us.” I point to the child in the window clearly talking to someone on the home computer. “I’m glad you hunted me, forced me into this. If you didn't I'd still be a lonely S.O.B. jacking it to venlil stuff right now.”
She flicks an ear. “I wanted sacrifice YOU.“ She spoke.
I smirked as I continued to weave. “Yeah but ya didn't. Cause I’m just so sexy!!!”
I can feel a ruble as she laughed, I didn't notice the twitching of her neck mussels as she swung her head over to slap my head with her upper lip. “Ow!!!” I screamed at the surprising strength of the dexterous lip.
I will never get used to how she can hold me like a rag-doll with just her lip. Nor do I want to.
As I nursed my wounded pride I placed the straw hat on her head. “Besides, this is a better use for the hay than causing you pain.”
She breathed out sharply and made a sound only a multi-ton mammal can produce.
“Okay, me get cure.”
I smiled and rubbed her ears, she adjusted the hat I made for her and rested her head on the ground once more.
​
​
**\*
​
​
She seemed antsy as she rocked back and forth, she was making a loaf of herself on the ground. But she could still reach up to my face with her lips as I sat down in a chair beside her.
The waiting room of the Xeno walk-in clinic reminded me more of the vets as species of every size and shape sat in chairs meant for humanoids, or sat on the ground or in perches or, rarely, species specific chairs. Though they were a rarity, a luxury whose expense was used for the most populous non-human species in the area.
Most of which were in a separate waiting room. I saw a family of Farsul enter it, opening the door to the KolSul wing of the clinic. Most everyone in the office instantly scowled when the mother and her pups walked through. They got both the separate wing and specialty chairs as they were by far the most populous Xenos on earth. Thanks to resentment building to massive levels all across the S.C. pushing them here.
I ran my hand through her main, careful to not undo any braids or tug any of her excessive adornments.She was still shifting this way and that as we waited to be called on. I spied a venlil with a deep scowl near the door of the separate wing, he seemed to be wearing a coat. Something highly unusual for his species, especially in this climate.
“Hello uh, we are not sure you… should be seeking care here.”
I was jolted out of my observations by a young farsul attendant addressing me.
“What?” She seemed to stammer.
“We, uh, are a xeno clinic, we specialize in ailments for non humans. Since we are on a human majority planet, human specialty clinics are open here. They can give you much better focused care."
I stared at the young farsul for a few moments, I studied her nervous stance. She seemed to resemble a great Pyrenees breed of dog. I continued to stare for a couple of seconds, enough to make the awkward situation even worse before I shook myself out of it.
“Oh, uh, I’m not here to receive care, my wife is.” I run my hand through her main and look down at her. This is the most nervous I've ever seen her in all my years with her. “She recently got the cure injection and is here to test it out in case something goes wrong.”
The farsul then takes on a deeply confused expression, snapping her head between me and her in quick succession. “...You two… are married?”
I smile and straighten my back and respond in the most enthusiastic voice I can muster. “Yep!!!”
She continued her confused expression before resigning herself. “...Alright then, I’ll get her tested… just follow me.” She turns as she reads our file, we were heading to a farm outside of town to test her on some authentic meat. As we exited the office I tapped her shoulder. “By the way, I saw a venlil by the Kolsul section door, I think is planning something bad.”
She took on a look of annoyed apathy, as though it was a daily occurrence. “Oh, him. Don't worry security is on their way to search him, you'd be surprised how many expats from Scalga we get.”
She rubbed the back of her head and I could barely make out something she whispered. “Not nearly as weird as a human yupla couple, Jesus Christ.”
​
​
**\*
​
​
There, the object of my fearless and terrifyingly powerful wife's hesitation. A single skinned chicken leg, sitting on a metal table. The farsul nurse was making superficial vital checks on her as she stared at the drumstick.
Her lips were curled under her chin.
“Common honey. It's not going to bite you.” I say to comfort her. She glances at me with a look of I don't want to do this, why did i let you convince me to do this onmygodi’mgoingtosacrificeyouyousonofabit-
Her simultaneous death stare/ pleading eyes were pulled away as the farmer spoke at us.
“Eat it and get off my property, I got enough animals to take care of. Don't need two more.” He pointed to my wife and the farsul nurse, they both gave him a scowl as he turned back into his house.
She gently unrolls her lips and tentatively brings out her barbed tongue and wraps it around the drumstick. She brings it into her mouth and I hear a series of slow crunches.
The farsul nurse looks over at her medical doodad as she chews.
“Hmm, it seems everything is in order, the cure has taken and she is handling the meat fine. Just call our clinic if she seems to be having-”
My focus was pulled away from the nurse as I saw my wife's eyes light up from the taste. She looked at the ground at the pecking chicken that was so near. I could hear her imitate the clucking of the chicken, I saw it shoot up and looked confused. Before my wife coils it in her tongue and quickly brings it into her maw, I hear crunching again and a loud gulp. She looks around at the pens and she spies a pig.
She stalks towards it and I can hear her imitating the pigs, she steps over the fence and quickly grapples the approaching pig and bites down hard on its head. I can see her tongue quickly strip the skin off as her lips dig in with their own bards to force the corpse up and into her mouth.
I stare in shock at the display, by this time the other pigs notice the smell of blood and my wife devouring one of their companions and they quickly run to the farthest corner of the pen.
Before I know it the corpse is gone, she licks her lips and walks back over to us.
“-mitochondrial flux drive. As long as that looks good over the next week you should be all set!”
“I , uh, she ate a pig! D-did you see that?” I point to my wife cleaning herself of the mud of the pen.
'Yes, you'd be surprised how suddenly ravenous former omnivores get when they get their appetites fulfilled for the first time, heck I remember I ate a guinea pig when I got cured I was so hungry!’
I wave my arms about. “SHE ATE AN ACTUAL PIG AND YOUR NOT ONE BIT IMPRESSED OR SCARED???”
She turned her gaze to my wife, who was currently spying yet another pig in the corner. “I’ve seen yulpa do it before, trust me, get used to her eating vast amounts of meat.”
I looked at the simultaneously nervous and unimpressed Farsul. I was still reeling from my wife's actions, but decided to deal with them another time. “O-okay”
“Good, now I'd suggest you get her to not eat another. The farmer will definitely notice two pigs missing.” She begins to laugh in her throat. “Heh, I guess he’ll have two less animals to take care of after today heh.”
As we rode back to the clinic my wife was fast asleep in a food coma. The way she just… ate that thing so fast… I think I have to worry about being eaten now. It felt… oddly exhilarating, like when she was still trying to convince herself to sacrifice me all over again.
I think I might have a problem.

Because I am a dork who has been interested in nutrition for years I was curious how much overlap there was between nutrition advice across the medical, scientific, and consumer self-help spectrum. So, I went through and read a whole bunch of books[1] on the subject, government guidelines across the globe, as well as a number of scientific articles (meta-analysis, editorials, etc.) and wrote down all the general principles they suggested.
Then I ran that through ChatGPT 4Omni and asked it to give me a list of the most common principles from most-often repeated to least. The answers were... not surprising! Turns out common sense really is common.[2] I suspect a lot of people will read these and say "yeah, no duh" but it was a fun exercise for me and it increased my confidence in the general intelligence of humanity and the value of the scientific method.
Below is the list of Healthy Habits organized by categories (Diet Principles, Eating Principles, Living Practices) and arranged in order from the greatest impact[3] to the least. So, if you want to try adopting any of these principles into your life start at the top of each list and work your way down.

Healthy Diet Principles

• Focus on Whole, Minimally Processed Foods
  
  • Avoid refined carbohydrates and highly processed foods.
    • Getting the majority of your calories in the form of from ultra-refined carbohydrates, fats, proteins has a very different effect on the body than minimally-processed carbohydrates, fats, proteins.
    • After a certain level of refinement the body doesn't like it.
    • Highly-refined calories can be "hyper-palatable" and trigger the evolved "binge response".
  • If you eat refined foods, choose ones you would have found hundreds of years ago:
    • Masa
    • Stone ground whole grain wheat flour
    • Rolled oats
    • Cheese
    • etc.
  • Cook foods gently to make them more nutritious:
    • Cooked foods are easier to digest (more nutrients absorbed) but too much cooking can destroy heat-sensitive nutrients.
    • Temperature * Time = Heat-sensitive nutrient loss. Choose fast, gentle cooking methods.
    • Microwaving > Pressure Steaming > Steaming > Pressure Boiling > Boiling > Slow cooking.
  • Avoid or moderate highly calorie-dense and nutrient-poor foods:
    • Oil and sugar have very little in the way of nutrients per calorie.
• Eliminate or Greatly Reduce Added Sugars and Oils
  
  • Use as little added oil as possible to make food taste good. Save the fats in your diet for whole plant foods.
  • Reduce or eliminate added sugars.
• Eat a Variety of Vegetables
  
  • Include vegetables in every meal.
  • Eat a variety of colors every day
    • The different colors (red, orange, yellow, green, purple) all indicate different vitamins and phytonutrients that are beneficial
  • Eat mushrooms, onions, garlic, and greens regularly
  • Make sure you have cruciferous vegetables regularly
• Limit or Avoid Animal Products
  
  • Factory farming is terrible for the environment
    • There are other ways to get the nutrients needed than killing animals
    • The vitamins you think you need from animal products (b12) you can get from plant foods, where the animals get it.
  • If you choose to eat animals consider them a condiment or special occasion food
  • Replacing animal protein with plant protein (legumes for meat) has shown to improve health and longevity
    • Plant proteins are the healthiest
    • Fish proteins are second healthiest
    • Fowl proteins are the third healthiest
    • Red meat proteins (beef, pig, deer, etc.) are the least healthy
  • Most of the longest-lived humans in [Blue Zones] eat very little meat
    • e.g. 40g a day average or less
• Eat Fruits Daily
  
  • Include whole fruits in your diet.
  • Avoid dried fruits and fruit juices.
• Make the Bulk of Your Calories Whole Grains and Starches
  
  • Base your diet around filling starches like whole grains, beans, corn, and potatoes.
• Use Salt and Sugar in Moderation
  
  • Reduce salt and sugar during cooking, and apply at the table as needed
  • Salt and sugar crystals that directly touch your tongue are the ones you experience
• Eat Nuts and Seeds in Moderation
  
  • Include nuts and seeds but in moderation.
• Eat Legumes Daily
  
  • Eat beans and pulses daily for protein and extra fiber
  • These are very good for your gut bacteria
• Include Flax Seeds & Other Seeds Daily
  
  • Flax is a great source of plant-based Omega-3 fatty acids
  • Seeds contain all sorts of different antioxidants and phytonutrients as well as healthy fats
• Use Spices and Herbs for Flavor and Health Benefits
  
  • Turmeric, cumin, and garlic all have anti-inflammatory properties
  • Nutritional yeast has health benefits based on their beta glucan content (and are often fortified with B12)
• Regularly Include Fermented Foods
  
  • Kimchi, sauerkraut, pickles, etc. are good for your gut
  • Fermented veggies also are a great way to include salt for flavor while also adding extra health benefits
• Ensure Adequate Vitamin and Mineral Intake
  
  • Consider a multivitamin for insurance
  • Vitamin D is basically required
  • Selenium likely if you're of European descent
  • B12 supplementation if you're a vegan
• Alcohol in Moderation, If at All
  
  • If you do drink, drink socially
  • All the major benefits (antioxidants) you can get from grapes
  • Alcohol is a diuretic—drink 1 cup of water for every 1 unit of alcohol to avoid hangovers

Healthy Eating Principles

• Eat When Hungry Until Comfortably Full
  • Listen to your body’s hunger cues.
  • If you're hungry it's ok to eat.
  • If you think you're hungry it's ok to eat
• Eat Meals Undistracted and Slowly
  • Focus on eating without distractions.
  • Take time to enjoy your meals.
• Hydrate Well
  • Drink plenty of water daily, 2.7-3.7 liters per day
  • Preloading a meal with 1-2 cups of cold water can fill you up faster and increase burn rate of calories
• Consider Intermittent Fasting
  • Fasting for at least 12 hours a day has health benefits (this includes sleeping)
  • Fasting more can reduce calorie intake as a side-effect, which could be beneficial if you want to lose weight
  • Listen to your body: Ignoring hunger signals constantly can raise stress hormone levels and potentially reduce beneficial hormone levels (e.g. testosterone)
• Front-Load Your Calories
  • Eating more earlier in the day means your body can use those readily-accessible calories for work and play
  • Unused calories near the end of the day tend to get stored (as fat) until needed later

Healthy Daily Practices

• Moderate Exercise Regularly
  • Aim for at least 30 minutes of moderate exercise daily.
    • Moderate means you are breathing harder and faster than you would be walking slowly
  • Incorporate strength training
    • Builds muscle and bone density
    • Do whatever kind you enjoy but body weight exercise (pushups, squats, pullups) is enough for major benefits
  • Incorporate flexibility training
    • Yoga, stretching

Notes:
[1] I started by reading through everything at Red Pen Reviews and then I moved onto the best-seller list for diet and nutrition on the NYT and Amazon.
[2] What I did find surprising is how rarely Calorie Counting was mentioned as a healthy habit. It was associated with weight loss in the short term, but most of the meta-analysis showed that over the long term most people gain the weight back so it wasn't considered a "general solution for health and longevity." I've excluded it from the list because it was way low down on the list of principles that GPT spit out and because it feels like a thing one can do on top of these habits, but the habits can also be practiced without writing down what you ate and how many calories were in them.
[3] I use the term "impact" to mean "basically a lot of studies showed significant and strong evidence in observational cohort metaanalysis that doing this is good for you"

First/Previous
“How’d you think that was going to go?” asked a voice from the other side of the door.
I lay on the bunk and stared at the ceiling; my head throbbed. The place where I’d been grazed stung whenever I touched my fingers to it. A bullet had—by whoever’s grace—scraped my scalp and traced a line from the far corner of my right eyebrow. It'd only been three days and it still caused pain. No doctors came and I was certain there would be infection—if not plain infection, then it could always be the worser: skitterbugs. I ached still. I had never fully recovered, not like how I should have.
The day of anger, as I’d begun to think of it in my mind, had caused no great ruckus beyond a few dead men. Two were Bosses, but who knew if they’d announce that as casually as they’d surely announce my execution. Perhaps they’d string me up alongside thieves. A good thief and a bad. What a riot; I deserved no thieves, of course.
What was I? Some great hero? Some idiot was more likely. I wanted misery to befall those that perpetrated it themselves and there I was, more miserable. Perhaps the wrath in my heart came from some mutation; the demon Mephisto resurrected me (so said the demon) and I’d begun to accept it. It was the reason for my poor state, surely, and the more I thought on it, the more I believed it was true; it felt true right down to my bones. The truth hurt or it was age and I rose from the cot I lay on; I’d been detained in a room beside the one I’d visited Andrew many months prior. They’d starved me, rattled the door to try and frighten me, and they’d wasted water on my head to keep me from good sleep.
I did not respond to the voice from the other side of the door and the object rattled in its frame and the voice came again, this time angrier, “Really? How did you think that was going to go? Crazy bastard! Thought you’d put the hurt on the Bosses? Thought you’d kill us at our worst? First, it’s that explosion. You have something to do with that? No! First, it was Harold’s daughter running off!” The voice on the other side of the door grew with mirth as it did with anger. “I’d seen you around town a bit. Thought the Bosses always liked you. Huh. Boss Harold mentioned you at his parties and said how you were a smart fella’, a good fella’, and there you killed him. Stone cold.” The man which spoke was a jailor that tortured me in those dreamlike days I spent locked in their prison, and he seemed personally affronted. “So first it’s the explosions; steam or dust rose out of cracks in the ground you know—some thought hell was rising up, but the Bosses put those thoughts to bed. God, what’s it with the likes of you? The explosions and now I’ve lost an eye and its because of the skitterbugs. You probably brought that on!” The voice muttered and then the door shook in its frame again, seemingly from a hard kick. I wished I could see the face of the man throwing his tantrum. “Can’t wait to see you hang.”
“So, I’ll hang?” I asked the door. There was a long silence, and I was uncertain if I’d pitched my voice enough for the man on the other side to hear me. I opened my mouth to ask, “So-
“You’ll hang.” The man on other side seemed to knock his knuckles against the surface of the door. “Or you’ll die here.”
“What’s Maron said?”
“Don’t you worry about him.”
“What’s he said?”
“Said you’d probably appreciate the punishment that we’d put on you. Said you’re a sick man. Said you like speaking with devils and people like you only find pleasure in such things.”
“So, I won’t hang?”
“Oh, you’ll hang, sir. You’ll hang if I need to do it myself with no one else. If not that, I’ll be sure to put you under one way or another. Accidents happen.” He chuckled. “Maybe you’d enjoy it, but it doesn’t matter. Whatever enjoyment you find in your tortures won’t compare to what ideas I have.”
A long silence followed, and I watched dust motes dance in the air; the place was stagnant and even a breath caused a shift in their glide. I closed my eyes and tried to remember a better time. I thought of Suzanne. I thought of Gemma. What a time to be alive. I thought of the movies, the books, the musical cartridges that sung of yesteryears. How unlucky I’d been, of course. Something had changed in me though and it was totally refreshing. Perhaps it was in realizing the evils of my brothers was that of a man and not some otherworldly force, or perhaps it was a push that came from years of terrible inconsistencies. All that living in the past and so it was. It didn’t matter—the past. I’d been so busy with it that I’d been in a constant state of unliving. I’d known that always, of course—something new had come.
“You dozing off in there?” asked the jailor.
“Nah.”
“Good. Stay awake or I’ll be forced to stay you awake.”
I’d been reborn with a rage, justified or otherwise, and it was felt all over. It was a wild compulsion. All that time and it had been me that was brought back.
The wound on my head throbbed and I prodded it with a finger and brought the finger away and examined the digit; it was dried well enough, and I did not smell infection nor were there any of the accompanying symptoms of a fever or hallucination. I was me, through and through. For now.
The door banged. I didn’t bother an answer and the door banged again.
“Who’s there?” I asked, surprising myself with the sarcasm.
“Why’d you do it?” asked the jailor.
“You wanna’ ask me about it now?”
“Tell me.” The voice on the other side of the door was serious entirely.
“Bah!” “Bah to you! Why’d you do it?”
“Is there a reason to explain myself? If you knew better the things I knew, would it get you to unlock that door and let me walk free? Would it change your mind even?”
The jailor caught a laugh before responding. “Can’t say it would.”
“So, what’s it that you want? You won’t understand me, and I don’t think I’ve got the energies of persuasion to try.”
“Try.”
“You like the Bosses?”
“They’re okay. Keep me in work anyway. Keep people safe.” I slumped forward onto my knees where I sat and placed my elbows on my knees and watched the crack at the base of the door on the other side of the prison cell. “What’s it matter if they keep you in work? Think they care about you anymore than what you represent?”
“Huh?”
“I mean, you keep riffraff down and they like you for it. I wonder if they know you. You ever get invited to the feasts they hold at the hall? You ever worry about your water rations? You ever wonder why it is that so few of the women or men invited to the hall return? Children too, now that I think of it. They’d call those captured criminals, I know. Those brothers—the sheriff is to blame too—they’re bastards. You know they are.”
“Is that so? What’s that make me? A bastard too?”
“By proxy maybe.” I dryly chuckled. “What’s it matter? What do you want outta’ me anyhow? Some gratification? Some confession—you’ve gotten that already, ain’tcha? Maybe a repentance? Why don’t you call one of those Bosses on down from their throne and have them here on the other side of the door so I can apologize? Or call Lady and I’ll get her to channel some message to the afterlife and I’ll plead for forgiveness. That what you want? Now I’m a bad man and I know it, but it ain’t for the reasons you believe. What you want is belief that there’s a man under the skin of the monster you’ve projected? No, I won’t shoo away your boogeyman for you. It can’t be done, not from me.”
“You talk big for someone in your predicament. I like how you talk so holier. Like you’re talking down on me. I just wanted to know what made you want to go on a mad-killing spree the way you did.”
“Mm.” I cupped my hands together; as it was, my left knee shot off with pain and I tried to massage it to little comfort and stretched it out straight from my body. “When violence keeps you bound, violence is necessary to free yourself. That’s all I’ll say about it. If you hang me, then hang me. Spill my guts out for the birds and put a sack over my head so you won’t be sick by my face.”
“You’re a mouthy pig.”
I listened to the jailor’s footfalls disappear down the hall and finally it was totally quiet and all I could hear was the throb on my head. Lucky or unlucky? No, it wasn’t luck. I’d been marked. I was the payment, and I knew the price. The demon had my soul. Whatever protection it afforded me, I intended on using.
The image of that room continued over in my mind, with the peasantry (that’s what I saw them as then) knelt in front of the Bosses and the wall men, with the intense blood-smell, with the surprise on Maron’s face. Billy’s face. There was still a part of me, however small, that wanted to plead with him to change his ways. That wasn’t the part that welled up in me then though. The piece of me that wanted to see him die was what took over. It hadn’t been Maron that fired his gun; he’d still been fighting with his holster. I’d only taken a step in through the door and a spray of gunfire from one of the wall men’s rifles exploded and I was sure I was dead because I fell, and my vision went white. They should’ve put me down then.
I didn’t come too fully until I had a few goons on me, hauling me upright roughly under my arms. Maron didn’t say anything at first and those wall men took over; they shouted that I was alive still and I felt a hot gun barrel against my cheek.
“Stop!” shouted Maron. The Boss Sheriff stepped forward with his stilted gait and looked me over thoroughly. The gun barrel fell from my cheek, but they held me still; it wasn’t like I planned on fighting. “You got uglier,” said Boss Maron, “Really ugly.” His left eye, afflicted by the skitterbug infestation, had gone dead white with only the faintest trace of an iris; it dribbled pus.
I held his stare to the point that my eyes watered—whether from anger or sorrow or both—and my muscles tightened like an animal threatening to pounce. It was a ridiculous display.
“Lock him up,” said Boss Maron.
So, I was locked up and those uncounted days I was mildly tortured: sleep deprivation, pummeling, and sometimes they spit on me. It could have been worse. I’d seen worse.
The cell was numbingly quiet, and I continued to massage my knee, continued in thinking about how investing so much thought with the past twisted any future of mine into a dismal satire.
I could not tell how long it had been without sunlight and the jailor returned (he was bulbous and fattened and old but very strong—it could be sensed in how he carried himself) pushed through the door this time with a tray of diced potatoes, steamed but cold, and a metal cup of water. He sat them on the floor, stared at the tray there with his one good left eye, and it was like I could read his mind as he looked at the food there. He could destroy it; he jerked from the tray without saying a word to me then disappeared behind the door he closed. The jailor remained there outside.
Pride swelled in me momentarily before I pushed whatever silliness that was and devoured the food and drank the clear water. If it was poison, so be it. If it was poison, then all the problems of the world would disperse.
Again, the jailor pushed in through the door and bent to remove the tray and I was struck by the immediate thought of strangling him. So, I tried and threw myself at the man.
My hands felt the scruff around his throat, and I pressed hard with my fingers on his Adams apple. He’d lurched forward to lift the tray and he immediately came up with force, throwing me off him; my nails raked his cheek as I scrambled for purchase. He took the metal tray in both of his hands and thwapped me across the head—it rang, and I was stunned while he lifted back his right hand in a swing. In the dizziness, I momentarily caught a glimpse of the holster on his left hip and reached out dumbly for the revolver there. A meaty smack could be heard, and I didn’t even feel it when his fist met my face the second time. My head rocked and I fought to look upright, and his hand came again, and I put up my own hand in return; it was pushed away, and he continued at me, muttering epithets he found useful.
Once he was heaving and spitting, he left me on the cot and directly before slamming the door, he mentioned something about violence and how if I liked violence so much that he’d show it to me.
I nursed myself to sitting right-up and though adrenaline kept the pain away, I felt my face bruising already. There was no way for me to inspect the welts his hands had left, but I could guess their places by touch and how they thrummed with my heart.
Two days passed, if I counted them by the visits from the jailor and then Maron made his appearance to me, and I was surprised to see him with a leather eye patch over his left eye; he seemed ill on his feet and the jailor, though the man was there, did not move to stop Maron from entering the room and relieving me of my prison. He and the jailor roped my hands together in front of my pelvis and I didn’t fight.
Boss Maron stank of infection and yellow oozed from beneath his eye patch and he kept his cowboy hat pulled snugly over both his ears and did not speak so jovially—there were no crude jokes at my expense. A warmth radiated off him. The Boss carried my shotgun with him but made no remark on it. He marched me from the prison, and I met daylight, and it burned my eyes while I stared up into the reddish sky. Dust scattered from the nearest portion of wall and caught on the wind till it was carried and disappeared overhead, and I briefly thought how nice it must be to fly.
Golgotha stirred as ever, and people spoke loudly and candidly as I passed them by. Words came my way from passing faces like, “You kissed the devil’s ass!” or, “You sure are a monster, look at you!” and Maron pushed me on with the gun at my back, and I wavered on my legs like I was without any control.
“Is it true?” asked Boss Maron, “Did you kiss the devil’s ass?” He tilted the shotgun casually on his shoulder and kept me ahead of himself. He was taking me to hang—and making a big deal out of it too. “I know how you like to speak to them. The demons. I know how you conspire with them. I told them all how you do. Now they know I was right.”
What a rotten town it was, and it smelled like it. The atrophied muscles and diseased infections of those fine folks emanated in the air, flies buzzed around my head, bloated and doubtlessly happy from whatever corpse they’d sprung from.
“Say somethin’,” said Maron.
“What do you want?” I asked, watching my footfalls, ignoring the screeches of those on the sidelines; he marched me through the runways, past the onlookers which saw me with faces of twisted hatred. The tension was palpable—I could feel the venom off the eyes of those that watched. Blood red eyes which judged carelessly.
“I want you to say it,” said Maron; I felt the nudge of the shotgun at my back again and I stumbled forward, caught myself, carried on, “I want you to admit it to me. You’re like a mutant, ain’tcha? No better than any other monster. I knew it all them years. I seen it.” We took an alley and cretins followed behind; wall men flanked Maron and on either side of the narrow stretch there were faces made even with the wall, pressed there like they were afraid to be involved.
“Whatever you say, brother.”
“Don’t,” hissed Maron, “Don’t even.”
“What?” I spat the word, “Afraid they’ll treat you differently if they all know how close we are?” I felt the gun barrel press against my back, and I yelped out the words, “Hey! He’s my brother! My baby brother!” The barrel jabbed me in the spine, and I spilled forward, catching myself on one of those nearby faces. It was an old woman. She shoved me from her, and I flailed across the ground after trying to catch myself with my bound hands. Dirt met my face and exploded around me. I laughed, blinking through the dust. I spit too. He couldn’t kill me. Whatever black magic there was in me—bequeathed by Mephisto—refused me death. Maron lifted me with the help of his wall men, pinching the coat around my throat with his fist. He shoved me on, and we continued.
“You smell that?” I asked Maron.
“Stop talkin’. You might not be a man, but you’ll die like one,” he said. The wall men around muttered, and we took the way to the front square; already there were looky-loos gathered, throngs of them not at all bashful to see the day’s line-up—it was just me. The platform was emptier and that was good (Frank, Paul, and Matt looked naked without their eldest brother). Those Bosses which remained looked drunk as they did for any other execution. It was a good day for it. Warm. The stink of the crowd was worse and as those gathered parted for my entourage, the warmth of them cloistered us like the blood of a wound.
Even through the vile aroma, the smell of rotted poultry rose like nothing else. “You don’t smell it then?”
The roar, a cacophony of the damned souls stolen, shook the ground and the air changed. A dragon—Leviathan.
Along the wall which old skeletal corpses hung against dried blood stains from hook-chains, men and women scattered the length of the parapets with their weapons. Gunfire came and one of those atop the wall shouted, “Artillery! Dragon! Big guns!”
There was fire in the sky and the creature circled overhead and its wings beat the wind like mad; those organic ropes that hung from its body took on horrid shapes with its movement in the high noon sunlight.
Screams filled the air as the square erupted into panic. I dove into the sickly crowd; among the loudness, the horses which were lined by the big door fought against their ties and bolted across the square. Arms and heads disappeared beneath those dashing hooves, and it was not long before people were trampling people and in a quick glance I saw the Boss platform came down in splinters as the horses rushes it. Blood slickened the feet of many as they rushed to the buildings adjacent the square—what a small protection that’d be against Leviathan. A wall man went stumbling over the wall’s ledge and his body met the ground beneath the hanging corpses and he didn’t get up.
In the wild fray, Maron fired the shotgun into the air, and I briefly thought of where the pellets might fall.
Finally, artillery fire came and put a hole in the creature. It wavered in the air, its head lurched downward like it might pierce the ground and it pulled its long neck back and blew flames across the buildings. The heat was immaculate. Rotted chicken filled my lungs.
“There’s more!” shouted a wall man above, “Running across the field.”
The crowd grew more enamored with escape; there’s no good way to say it—blood frothed around our heels as I was shoved through the avenues of elbows, rocking heads, plunging knees. I pushed on, shielding myself with my bound hands as well as I could. I kept my head as high, and felt scratches reach my throat—doubtlessly those which could not continue—nails and fists came from every direction. In the ephemeral madness, I too screamed and it did not stop until I spilled into an alleyway along the wall nearest the execution chains. I ran and tripped from the crowd, slid, and bit my tongue so thoroughly that my teeth clicked together though the tissue; my breath was knocked from me. My pants were wet from the viscera. Others too had found the opening and barreled past me. I went to my feet and panted thought the pain, through the twinge in my left knee. I took the walls for support and still, those which rushed past nearly knocked me from my feet.
Some poor child—a lean, bony-faced boy—fell in the rush and before I had a moment to reach out, he was gone. Whether he lived or not, I did not stop to know. The crunch of bones as more people spilled into the narrow stretch indicated the worst.
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Hi, I am a 34 y/o female, I am currently 100 lbs.
I’m a recovering addict and alcoholic who got sober Jan 1, 2024. I’ve had a lot of medical issues in life and I’ve been medicated on psych meds since I was 12.
I’m currently taking 500 mg of Depakote daily, 100 mg of gabapentin, and 10 mg of Lexapro.
I’ve been having some weird symptoms that have gotten worse over the last month.
I’ve lost 10 lbs in the last year, all my teeth hurt, my bones hurt, my skin and hair is weird and dry, I have horrible headaches, pain in my flank areas, gastrointestinal issues, I’m peeing like 25 times a day, pooping around 8 times a day, I have 3 nodes on my thyroid and hyperthyroidism, I have HPV I just found out, tinnitus in my ears, muscle twitches, I sweat a lot at night time, insomnia, the zio patch I had on for a week came back with 3 times where I had tachycardia and my doctor who’s not my doctor anymore seemed a little concerned when he talked to me today which was the last day I will be seeing him. I also have bipolar 2. I know. It’s a lot.
My labs are weird. The doctor I had isn’t my doctor anymore because he hasn’t taken me seriously at all, treated me like I was a liar and a child and did nothing for me at all so I changed providers and now I have to start all over with a new one and all the referrals I had in progress are null and void and it’s setting me back weeks/months since it’s such a long wait to get into a specialist.
I’m hoping someone can read my current labs and tell me what you think…
BUN 20 Mg/DL
BUN/CREATINE 25.0
GLUCOSE 152 Mg/DL
UROBILINOGEN 2.0
HGB 14.2 mg/dl
Pulse 105
Systolic 168
UA-RBC 3-5
POCT-Ketones trace abnormal
Salicylate 2.5
DHEAS 374
The doctor I had was so dismissive of me and I feel like there is something wrong with me. I live in a small town and the docs are notorious for missing things and chalking them up to something that’s not really the case. I know my body better than anyone else and something is not right!
I got sober to live a new life and now I feel like dog shit. I’m a mom, a partner, a daughter, a sister, a friend, amongst a lot of other things and how I am now, I can’t even work, I can barely function. I hope that this post isn’t missed like my other ones have been. Please help me❤️‍🩹

Vacations were going to start, and as usually happened, we were assigned a project, to be with a person of a different species during the time we were out of class (Approximately 1 Short Cycle)
The volunteers from the different species showed up and they began to draw who would stay. I was thinking about what I could do with my assigned partner and how great it would be, until they said my name.

• p'tibas, this will be your new partner, his name is Tomas

To my surprise and surprise, in front of me was a human, the most boring species there could be, even the arachnid species from quadrant 7, whose entertainment was to weave intricate silk traps and then undo them and make them again, it seemed more entertaining than a human
had not arrived long ago on the galactic stage, less than a long Cycle, and, although they showed great adaptability and together, created various things at an incredible speed, individually they were very boring, they would never build a starship alone, or ferrify a planet alone, not even build a territory alone, it seemed that when they were alone all their creativity went away or something like that, and even when they did a project in groups that they thought would be very long, it seemed that they abandoned it when they started to get bored, because in The list of members always changed personnel, they almost never made it even for an entire Short Cycle before retiring.
-Hello - I said without much enthusiasm, observing my assigned colleague, this was going to be a very boring vacation.
After classes, we met to organize what we would do from now until the end of the holidays.
-Well, human, what were you planning to do?
-Call me Tomas, and, I was planning to go on a trip or something, I have a ship that my parents gave me and I thought we could start with that, in fact, I have many plans, I mean, we still have a lot of time
-That sounds like an excellent plan- I felt like my hopes were renewed when I heard that, maybe I had enough and I had crossed paths with the funniest brother of his species, or at least one not so boring.
We spent the first 20% of the Short Cycle exploring human territory, it was more entertaining than I thought, and it taught me many things about its culture; like they were one of the few super predatory species in the stellar union, which surprised me quite a bit, because with their lazy hands and fragile bodies they didn't seem very threatening; He taught me how to camp, I thought it was strange that they wanted to sleep outdoors, and near dangerous animals, but I really liked the marshmallows, he told me that when we met he was 20 human years old, but I can't understand his time system, and I couldn't pass my age to human age, now that I look back on it, I'm surprised that he signed up to be my partner at such a young age and I understand what it entailed, but we had a great time, he taught me about his arts and sports, history and culinary, when we left human territory he seemed like a different person, although I assumed that he had become accustomed to my presence, and I assumed that his change in appearance was due to the observation that humans have with what they call "fashion", and the fact that for some reason, the little hair they had on their bodies seemed to not want to stop growing
Then, we went to many places that I already knew from the rest of the galaxies, which lasted another 20% of the Cycle, it was strange to see how he was fascinated by everything, the plants, the animals, even something as simple as the clouds of dust in space made him look like it was the most fascinating thing in the universe, he also once begged me almost crying not to go to quadrant 7, apparently he had "arachnophobia", it made me laugh when he showed me a hologram of a tarantula from the earth, and when I showed him a hologram of the "arachnids" (he called them) he fainted, I was very scared because of that, my species does not suffer fainting and I didn't know what to do, but when he regained consciousness he just made fun of me concern and ultimately said he was not going to go to the "planet klendathu" on his own initiative
For the next 30% of the short cycle we went to where neither of us had ever been, although in his case it was a simpler task, because from the little he knew about the space it seemed that he never really planned to travel the rest of the space outside of the human section, or at least that's what I thought, Tomas demanded that we document every discovery we made, at first I didn't understand why, but then, for some strange reason our research began to be renowned in the scientific community, especially human biologists, who They had the same enthusiasm as my human
For the last 30% of the Short Cycle that we had left, I was very tired from traveling, and Tomas too, he seemed very tired, and different, I don't even know when he changed so much and without me realizing, his hair that was previously black as space, now it was white as snow, it seemed that he no longer had the energy that he had when we started the trip, I had asked him if he was sick, but he said that he was fine, that he was just a little tired, so I decided to do some simple ones, build a terrarium
something not very big, about 5km2, we chose each plant, each insect, animal, each milliliter of water, everything to make the perfect ecosystem, we built a small cabin near Tomas' favorite tree, because yes, for some reason he became fond of One tree in particular, I would laugh at it, but it looked so cute; We sealed the land in a "glass" dome, in reality it is not glass but Tomas calls it that, it had a small entrance so we could enter and exit, but nothing more, then we stayed to see how the time passed.
But after a while I couldn't take it anymore and I insisted on asking him if he was okay, he was almost without energy and very weak, he forgot things and was almost to the bone.
-I guess it was inevitable that you knew
-Know that? You're hiding something from me? You're sick, right? I knew it, I knew that...
-No, I'm not sick, it's just that humans live less than you, before we had an average lifespan of 80 human years, until we achieved speed faster than light, and you appeared, joined us to the galactic community and Thanks to their technology, they increased the average lifespan to 200 human years, which is a lot, but it is still tiny compared to the galactic average, it is something less than a short and a half cycle.
I was shocked after what he had said, did that mean that Tomas was going to die? The human who was still learning, regardless of what miniscule amount of time they shared, was the person I had ever loved the most, he limited himself. to hug your human and sob
-Are you sure I can't do anything?
-Yes I am
"I wish I could spend the rest of my life with you," I said almost in a whisper.
-Haha, what, now you are going to ask me to marry you? -He said to make me laugh
but I remembered it, human marriage, right?, the union between two people for eternity, very few species had something like that, I dried my tears and knelt down as Tomas had shown me years ago.
-Tomas, would you agree to marry me?
Tomas looked at me with some surprise, but then he told me, "Yes, I accept."
We got married a few human weeks later, more people had come than we thought, many of them friends we met throughout our travels, many of my and Tomas's relatives.
After that we spent the best (for me) years of our lives, we didn't do anything, but we were very happy together, 10 human years later he died, I was next to his favorite tree, I still go every day to see him - he sighs while playing with the wedding ring that I still had - I stayed taking care of the terrarium for the rest of the Short Cycle, when I returned to school it felt as if a whole life had passed, and in a way, it did, all my classmates made fun of the fact that I only We would do some expeditions and a terrarium, and the human got "bored and left", as humans do, they did not know that "the human" was dead, they would not understand it, they would not understand how important that terrarium was, they would never know how much that there was so little, that's why, students, you are now in this class, Understanding xenosocieties, so that you can see the universe that surrounds you and the life that inhabits it from a different point of view
I'm sorry if something is translated wrong, English is not my first language and I am translating this with Google Translate

11th: Jerri Manthey 1.0 (The Australian Outback - 8th)

mother
u/SMC0629:
Despite how anyone feels about Outback, I think Jerri is the one character who transcends those opinions. She is a pioneer in terms of Survivor villains, literally the original, and for better or for worse, she had the entire fandom in a chokehold back when the show started. She's super complex and fun to watch, and EASILY my favorite character of the season.
~
u/DryBonesKing:
Survivor’s original villain. Man-eater Manthey, the original Black Widow, Survivor’s very first “mactor” casting, the asshole who said Keith couldn’t cook rice, the horrible person who accused Kel of smuggling beef jerky… Honestly, I think Jerri’s gotten underrated nowadays. There’s some meaningful discussion to be had about the extent of how much of a villain Jerri is based on modern day perspectives, but I have also seen it accompanied by takes about Jerri being neither a villain nor “that entertaining”, and honestly, I categorically reject both assertions.
Jerri carves herself a truly unique role in Outback and serves as a fantastic foil to all of the main characters of the show. She’s narcissistic and vain and has very little filter on her thoughts (i.e. her complaints about Keith and her open flirting with Colby), and she’s also very cutthroat with some amazing one-liners. I think Jerri is the first person in the show’s history to make a reference to “making a deal with the devil” and god does she pull it off so well. Her relationship with Colby is genuinely iconic. Her relationship with Tina is also pretty damn amazing as well (especially as it starts with both of them being suspicious of Kel). Her hatred of Keith, her feud with Elisabeth, the forced politeness she and Rodger share… hell, she manages to do the genuine impossible task of actually making Amber Brkich seem entertaining on Survivor! Give this woman an Emmy for fuck’s sake!
The beef jerky, her making tortillas to one-up Keith, her involvement in the Mitchell tribal council as one of his faithful allies, the “drizzle chocolate on a hot guy’s bod”, Colby splashing her with water after Ogakor lost reward, their late “date” at the Great Barrier Reef, her blindside, both Tina and Colby taking potshots at her in the FTC… there’s so much to say about Jerri. And despite all of these iconic moments and being such an iconic villain, she herself has a relatability to her that I think should not be ignored. Truly, one of the best of all time. Someone who should realistically make every Endgame.
Overall Rank – 9/821
~
u/Zanthosus:
The original villainess of Survivor. She’s the star of her season, and she has one of the most perfect three season arcs in the show’s history. I adore her in every iteration, but here she’s basically perfect. A true 10/10 character through and through. It’s really telling that the quality of the season goes down considerably after her elimination.
~
u/Tommyroxs45:
The original villainess of Survivor. Her dynamic with Colby is iconic for a reason they have some of the best moments in survivor history. And perfectly sets up Colby’s story as well as just being completely tv gold with her beef jerky gate, Hershey bars, whenever she is on screen you know you are gonna get the Manthey experience.
~
u/ninjedi1:
Jerri is definitely one of the most well known characters, originally one of the most hated people on the show, and nowadays is one of the most beloved (although not a fan of the revisionist take that she was the hero of the season). From the beef jerky debacle, to her relationship with Colby, with having the ability to tick off a number of people with her attitude without even knowing, she's pretty fun overall.
~~~~~
u/Regnisyak1:
Jerri Manthey (Australian Outback, 8/16)
Jerri, Jerri, Jerri. The maneater of the show has one of the most important roles in the series and is a necessary character, not just in the history of Survivor, but the history of Reality TV. She shows what happens when a personality clash happens on Survivor. She demonstrates the pride of strong women and how they are immediately ostracized on these TV shows as being a “bitch.” The double standard she expresses, where she is playing a clear strategic game, but is relegated to the position of the camp pariah because of her behavior is endlessly fascinating. But most importantly? She is the true first villainess, the first true flirt of the series, and she is the demonstration of perceived evil in society when in reality people desire scapegoats. She is a stellar character and one of the few characters whom I ultimately question where I have in my rankings - and perhaps one day could be my number one of all time. I love Jerri.
There are about one million things I love about Jerri, so for this essay, I want to frame it in a certain manner that is easy to follow, both for myself and you all. Jerri’s strengths are mainly showcased in her relationships with other people on the island - namely, Keith, Colby, and Tina, and coincidentally, that is the order in which this paper will go. With Keith, we understand Jerri’s humor, bossiness, and personality best. Often, Jerri IS right whenever she complains about Keith - he is simply put, an idiot, and Jerri outshines him in everything. With Colby, we understand a newer facet of Survivor that hasn’t been shown - sexuality on Survivor, and how it's dealt with. With that, Jerri is also deemed as a villain, especially given the situation of Ogakor and their… conservatism. And lastly, Jerri is a free independent woman in the series - which means she is SATAN! A discussion of Tina will take over the last section of this write-up because she is the primary source of Jerri becoming the original villain that we all love and know her for.
I mentioned a long time ago in my Jerri 3.0 cut that I didn’t think that I was able to get her cut for endgame (because at that point, we all kind of agreed Jerri was making endgame), so the fact that I am in this position, to talk about one of my favorite characters of all time, is just an honor. Outback is a very underrated season when it comes to the theming of Survivor, and the fact that I get a chance to deep dive into it as extensively as I will right now is a lot of fun.
Part I: “He Should Keep His Day Job” - Jerri and Her Personality (featuring Keith and other Friends)
Opening right away on the now iconic helicopter scene, Jerri almost immediately came out on the island guns blazing when she reached the camp… by arguing with Keith. Keith in general is a condescending dink, but right away, he begins to suggest things for camp, when in reality they would not work in the context of how they should live - in other words, his ideas are kind of lame. But this culminates in the second when the world-class chef continues to cook the rice horrifically.
Jerri and her tortillas are unfortunately a bigger character than Amber 1.0, but they show so much about her character in such a short amount of time. One is that she is not afraid to speak her mind, both in confessionals and in the game. She complains about Keith not being able to cook something as simple as rice in the middle of the beach, while Jerri can do it with relative ease. She is not afraid to call his ass out on the issue either, because his rice sucked and she knew she could do it better. But it also shows Jerri’s bossy side, which seems to especially come out whenever she is hungry (or wakes up in a bad mood… or doesn’t get what she wants… or is annoyed… or… well you get the point). While Jerri is hilarious in the moment, and right because everyone hates Keith’s rice, people still see her as being negative because she has such a personality clash with the tribe, who tend to be people who follow, rather than lead like Jerri. People like her should be appreciative of what Keith is doing, but she breaks the mold and goes against the line. This culminates in Episode 3 when Jerri mocks Keith AGAIN because she is catching more fish than him without barely trying! Her overconfidence is further a key component in her character, and something that pushes people away.
I’d be wrong to not bring up JerkyGate at this point, which happens in the same episode with Jerri and also shows her abrasive side. We might never know if Kel snuck beef jerky on the show, or was simply munching on grass, but one thing we do know is that Jerri was pissed and led the witchhunt against him. Ultimately, Jerri is not afraid to take the lead on anything, even if the facts are not clear, and while the tribe was pissed at Kel for potentially having food and not being prepared to share with 7 other starving people on the island, Jerri got more flak for the situations due to how harsh she was in the concept. It’s another staple of her character.
Episode 3 is also an interesting episode for Jerri because it showcases one positive trait of her and her game. At the end of the day, while she could get annoyed easily and maybe isn’t the nicest when she is hungry, she is loyal to the people that she is friends with. Mad Dog was one of the most difficult votes for her at that point of the game because she considered her a close friend, but ultimately that was where the chips lay. It further expands to Mitchell in the next episode, where Jerri specifically mentions friendship in the game, and how she is not as close with some on the island as others. This sets off red flags for a particular Tennesseean and something I will go into more detail earlier, but it shows that no matter how the show portrays her if she likes you, she will be loyal to you. What’s important about this scene, however, is that it is a classic example of Jerri speaking before thinking about the words that she is saying. Jerri’s immediate regret in the next episode showcases her fear of the game and shows that she has game awareness, despite not having social awareness. Ultimately, her loyalty takes a front view at the end of Episode 4, as she refuses to vote for Mitchell, which puts her on the outside of the tribe because of Tina’s last-second vote flip on their hike over to the tribal council.
As time progresses, we begin to see more sides of Jerri, and it is up to us as the viewer to construe the positivity or negativity of Jerri. She is constantly complained about for her attitude on the show, whether it is her style of gameplay or her continued attitude on the beach. The gameplay portion of her game is rather important. As the game progresses we see Jerri become more and more paranoid. Jerri is a classic example of a player lacking self-awareness of how their behavior might affect people in the future, but what is notable is that she quickly understands that people do not like her in the game. I don’t think she is ever aware of the extent of the game and her behavior, (which I think explains her bitterness toward Tina in All-Stars) but she does know that people will never take her to the end, either because she is not deserving or because she is playing a good social game. But, that leads to Jerri becoming a paranoid mess, desperate to strategize with almost anything at this point. One notable moment is her strategizing with Colby in the middle night, which is something that he CLEARLY did not want to do. This was yet another strike, but showed that Jerri, while being bossy all the time, is also really game-oriented, but she doesn’t recognize what times she should - it reminds me of a lot of characters on the show, but Jerri is the true example of that, where she is actively seen as bossy AND overplaying.
But Jerri’s bossiness reaches a new height once the Kuchas come over to the tribe. Immediately, the Ogakors look like idiots because that dumbass Keith accidentally took the matches to the old Kucha tribe by accident, leading the women to have no ability to make fire, as their guests meander to their tribe. Further, we get Jerri being incredibly bossy about the rice and such, yet again, as the merge progresses. With this, we understand the entire characterization of Jerri with a simple Rodger voting confessional “Most days she gets up in a good mood, but oh baby, watch out if she gets up in a bad mood.” We get some classic Jerri personality clashes at this point in the post-merge, notably with her complaining about how Elisabeth cooks the food every morning, and how she has a specific way of cooking it.
This scene is especially important because it is a rare time when we see Elisabeth, of all characters, break their character and lose the sweetheart facade for a moment because of Jerri’s sheer negativity around camp. Elisabeth tends to keep her composure throughout most of the season, but you can tell her annoyment in this situation, and it sparks a different side of her character that we did not get an opportunity to see - a more malicious side where she pushes a lot of the Jerri boot in the process. It was yet another personality clash with Jerri at this point, and something that caused another strike because of her abrasion. And what’s funnier is that Jerri came into the merge to hide that attitude. She was attempting to be nice and together with the Ogakors as the other two Kuchas meandered over to their tribe, and she was even going to stay loyal to the final 3, who she never really knew the extent they hated her, but her power on the tribe was just too great, and her attitude finally wore them down. She went home in that episode, for a mix of reasons. Her abrasion, her attitude, her differences from the “good” people on the tribe, and her strategic abilities.
Jerri so effortlessly creates argumentation in the tribe, whether it is deserved conflict or perceived conflict because of her attitude. Her ability to be such a natural villain without over-hamming it up, and just merely due to her negative personality, is beyond impressive on the show, and something that I can’t overemphasize my appreciation for. Ultimately, Jerri is not really that bad, and I think many could even suggest that she is the right half of the time, but she ultimately cannot make that point clear because she just comes off too strongly. But is it her fault? Maybe not. At this point, we have to start looking at the other people in the tribe. Ultimately, Jerri is abrasive, the vitriol she got was just not deserved. It’s due to simple perceptions, initial first perceptions, and perhaps gender roles that created such an intense portion of the game with Jerri, and why she meets the themes of the season so well. But before that, let’s jump into the other character and their dissolution of a potential relationship, to a rivalry that last over a decade. He ain’t no Hershey bar, either.
Part II: “I Am SUCH a Sucker for Cowboys” - Jerri and Sexuality/Gender Roles
The tumultuous roller coaster that occurs between Jerri and Colby is telegraphed so greatly during Australian Outback, and ultimately it is because of one thing, and one thing only. Avoiding the full Freudian comparison, Colby is a MAMA’S BOY!
Jerri and Colby begin the show with having a mutual relationship and liking for each other, while also having their knives sharpened and ready to stab at the correct period. Probably one of my favorite and underrated scenes of Jerri was when she gave Colby the massage on the island. Both give immediate commentary in that they can see right through each other and know exactly what they are doing to each other. Jerri begins the massage but knows that at some point in the game, even though she is attracted to Colby, she will have to stab him in the back. On the other hand, Colby sees right through her sexualization of him and knows that Jerri will be in trouble down the line.
Something that Jerri’s weaponizes is her flirtatious nature. I don’t think Jerri gets enough credit for using that as her strategy and being the first really to use it in such an obvious way, because she is actively using it to win people over, notably her potential boyfriend on the season, Colby. To me, I think Jerri very well knows how she is acting on camp, and using her powers of seduction as a way to convince Colby to move over to her side and be a strong ally for her character. I think she also just has a crush on Colby, but as we’ve seen from her being strategic and understanding game awareness, she knows exactly what she is doing.
Probably, my favorite example of Jerri and her sexuality is the classic scene with her and the chocolate. Chocolate releases endorphins. Poor it over a hot bod. Hopefully, Colby is in her fantasies. I mentioned this casually in my Jerri 3.0 writeup, but her relationship with chocolate is one of my favorite side stories of Jerri because she mentions it consistently in all three seasons she appears. I don’t think it is overshadowed at all in Survivor, but with it appearing in the same episode as Trial by Fire, I do think its placement gets forgotten. She’s on the beach, lying next to a log (wait that’s AMBER?!?) and discussing just so blatantly how chocolate is an aphrodisiac near Colby, whom she admits pretty firmly that she is fantasizing about in her daydreams. Yes, we get the Hershey Bar scene here, but Jerri destroys this scene with how classic she is, just because it was so unique and different to hear a woman like her so blatantly talk about sex in that manner. Like for 2001, that’s SHOCKING. But it is reality, and I think Jerri being the leader in that role is pretty incredible.
But, silly goofy gender roles come into play, and it causes a riff between the tribe because it does make the rest of the tribe uncomfortable. Again, I will go into this more detail down below, but Colby and Tina don’t like how open she is about how she wants it, and I think that is really important contextualization for the tribe because they are a bunch of conservatives on the tribe. They don’t need to hear that, and Jerri, someone they’ve already had issues with, is already annoying as is, and this just adds insult to energy.
But as they progress, we see their relationship continue to tumble down a hill, picking up speed as it rolls down faster and faster. Colby is getting irritated with Jerri at this point, and I think Tina is involved a lot in this position on the season. As I mentioned earlier, Colby is a total mama’s boy, and that is immediately confirmed when his mom comes strolling out on the island after he wins one of his ten million challenges. We question his motives throughout the season, but I think Tina clocked Colby immediately for being someone who respects elders in his life, and her power of acting as a motherly figure for his character begins the general dislike for Jerri because at first they did get along and created an alliance. But they continue to struggle, and whether it is Colby throwing the water at Jerri during the challenge, or his general apathy as the game progresses and lack of interest, their relationship is going down, and a lot of it is due to Tina and her negative attitude toward Jerri and her character.
Their awkwardness of their, for a lack of a better word, “situationship”, culminates into the classic honeymoon scene, as they go to the reefs and slowly ruin a national landmark in Australia (lol). They lounge on the chairs out there, but Colby first issues a rule with Jerri - no one is allowed to talk about strategy out on the reward. This is a time to relax, and he simply has no desire to hear it. It was hilarious how differently the two were on different pages, with Colby not giving any fucks about Jerri (he dragged her along the challenge but did not want to win), while Jerri somehow fell more in love on her honeymoon without sex. The dichotomy of their games, with Colby playing a better social game, but not so much one with game awareness, while Jerri having the exact opposite, became quite clear here.
Jerri’s ultimate lack of understanding of how to use her strategy, and the divide of her negative attitude, something that is very difficult to change at the end of the day, creates a varied strategy that ultimately fails on cylinders. But the more important part is how a woman who has these feelings, basically being a love-sick puppy, gets ostracized by the entire country of America for her behavior. I think the perception of Jerri and her seductive nature is probably the most interesting about her character because it is highly lauded in seasons now, but when it happened then, she was the equivalent of the devil. It represents the double standards of women on Survivor because god forbid a woman shows that she has a strong sexuality. I love how Jerri embraced it, and while she did have issues making it actually… work, it still created some interesting tension among the much more conservative tribe members of Kucha and Ogakor.
Ultimately, I think Jerri and Colby’s relationship ends with fire because he just straight up lies to her when he mentions who he is voting for her because she is so done with her attitude. Jerri isn’t shocked at tribal because early Survivor didn’t understand blindsides, so they likely told her beforehand, but I think you can see she is heartbroken by the decision because Jerri was a mouthy, but loyal soldier. Even at the end, I don’t think anyone expected Jerri’s game because she was trying to fish for answers with her jury questions, and I think there’s a certain tragedy that Jerri was playing a strategically forward game, but was ultimately ruined because of her boisterous personality.
And again, I’d be wrong not to mention the sheer strength of Jerri and Colby, and how their relationship progresses throughout the seasons. From this, we get legendary moments in All-Stars that give the season some semblance of watchability, which leads to an incredible three-season arc for the duo. I wouldn’t go into too much detail because this write-up is already getting to be way too long, but it is pretty great, and watching Jerri get the final word on Colby twice is great.
Part III: “She took the canoe!” - Jerri and The Themes of Australia
Lastly, Jerri symbolizes the themes I’ve talked about loving so much in Australian Outback - understanding what deserving means on the season, and how that turn has no relevance to the season. Once someone gets pegged as “undeserving” it is hard to fight against that reputation, even in a favorable way. The problem is that Jerri constantly gets dogpiled, to the point where she can never bounce back from what people thought of her with her initial perceptions.
Tina’s hatred of Jerri symbolizes that, as she was one of the leaders of the concept of good vs. evil. Throughout the premerge, Tina plays a hidden role, but eventually, we begin to understand the “good people” winning, or those who agree Tina initially perceives as those who are “good.” The entire perception comes from her. This means white people who don’t have an attitude problem. I think Australian Outback is beyond interesting because of that because it shows how the cast can change what people describe as deserving, and that it can be completely subjective depending on the season.
No one on Survivor is truly “deserving” to make it to the end or not. It’s almost entirely luck. But Australian Outback tries to establish that, which makes it unique against the other seasons of Survivor because deserving is never really as vocalized as it is in this season. Tina disguises what being “good” means, and it causes the endgame to work out the way it is. Jerri is only the first victim that Tina has with this march, but the good vs evil marking leads to an interesting dichotomy between the two groups.
Besides that, their relationship reconfirms gender roles of the season, with someone who lives in a more conservative setting, versus one who didn’t and has broader strokes of liberalism with it. Tina is very conservative in her roles in society, as we see with her judgments of Jerri all season, which is described as negative when Jerri begins to talk about sexuality. Of course, there's a right and wrong place to talk about it, and Jerri often did do it at the wrong times, but it clouded Tina’s mind to the point where she couldn’t change her mind.
The conceit of friendship and connections also comes into play with Jerri. Again, at Mad Dog’s tribal she accidentally leaks that friendships do exist on Survivor, and she has quite a few. This immediately paints a target on her back because she admits to having an alliance, but also likes other people more than others. It set off two people, with Tina who already began to dislike Jerri, but also Colby, who understood Jerri could be a loose cannon, and he didn’t like when people ostracized other people on the tribe. Jerri was considered rude in this situation, and this was yet another domino in Jerri’s villain arc.
No one is right or wrong in this situation because putting people into schemas is natural. I don’t want to make a moral judgment about this story, but ultimately, Tina’s story did boil down to her only supporting people who have her views. And I love it. But Jerri as the main villain, when in reality, she was just an outspoken woman on a tribe that has more conservative views is an incredible contrast with one another. I don’t want to make this section about Tina any longer than it should be the ranker will do a great job speaking about her, but Jerri as a concept was through Tina’s perception, and she ultimately became a scapegoat for the tribe person that they can pile on easily.
Whether Jerri deserved the vitriol is up for debate, but ultimately, it’s a reflection on society. Jerri was both right and wrong with her accusations, and most of the time, she was right with her perceptions. But once you get targeted for that negativity, it is hard to shake off what happens for the rest of the time. We naturally look for scapegoats, and when someone falls out of line, they get targeted next to society. Tina perfected this strategy to a T and deserved every penny. And Jerri? She was the first victim in that description.
It’s why Jerri’s common complaint about her game being “tame” in comparison is always a weird take to me. It’s not the point about Jerri. She’s a bitch, but it is not really because of her style of play or how she plays the game, it’s because of how people perceive her on the show. Symbolically, her role in Australian Outback represents such an important facet of society and how people can tend to pile on when first impressions are not met properly. She is supposed to be tame in comparison to the legendary characters because she is tame. She’s just extraordinarily bossy and clashes with other people. Ultimately, this is why I love Jerri. She goes against the grain and gets punished for it, when in reality, how much she deserves it is questionable, and should be up for debate.
Her downfall is legendary from two different angles. One is if you support Tina’s narrative of getting out the negativity on the season. The other is tragic when you understand that Jerri was ostracized because of her personality, and given a chance to grow outside of it because the other tribe members were mum about their feelings. Having a character who has two completely different interpretations of how their boot occurred has a lot of implications for Jerri and showcases how stellar her character is. A lot of it is ambiguous, and while Tina’s side was much more supported in the narrative, I think both are valid takes to understand how Jerri went home.
Part IV: “I don’t know who I am out here” - Concluding Thoughts
Ultimately, as Jerri knows she is going home, she learns that she does not recognize herself out there on the island. And I believe that. Jerri becomes a mess after a while and a lot of factors could have led to that. Whether she does have a bossy personality, hunger on the island, being around people who don’t like her, or being in the same place constantly, could lead to why Jerri became Jerri on the island. But ultimately, it’s the symbolism that surrounds her boot. First impressions mean everything on Survivor, and sometimes you can go down a rabbit hole that evolves into whether someone on the series was deserving or not.
A good character for me is someone that you can spin easily. Spin their meaning into something that relates to society. And Jerri is probably the easiest character to do that for. She has so many implications about whether or not she is a villain, and how that can translate to the larger role of society. It’s a tragic blend of gender roles, personality clashes, good in society, and negativity overall and how that affects the mood. It leads to a beautiful blend of a character that is not only asking all these questions but incredibly entertaining to boot.
That’s something I’ve mostly been quiet about, but whenever Jerri has a personality clash, it’s almost gleeful to watch her be so blissfully unaware, with a top 5 laugh in reality TV (Cirie and Amy Crews from BB4 are also there). Jerri is someone who makes me consistently laugh because she is so detached at times from reality and truly doesn’t understand how these people feel about her. When she complains about tortillas, she is a magnetic narrator, and her annoyance is clear through her emotions. When she discusses sexuality, you can feel a certain emotion from her, as well as the mood shift around the camp. Ultimately, she is one of the most expressive, hilarious, funny narrators in the history of the show.
When she leaves, you can tell the magic nearly disappears because she is a queen of conflict and drives all of it on the season. Jerri was the life and soul of the season, and while Tina dominated the strategy, Jerri dominated the character. She is one of those few characters that makes characters better than they should be. I am so happy that she had the opportunity to make the endgame again, and I am even more overjoyed that I had the opportunity to talk about her in more detail.
Personal Rank: 6/821 <3.
SMC0629: 14
DryBonesKing: 8
Zanthosus: 10
Tommyroxs45: 14
Regnisyak1: 6
DavidW1208: 4
ninjedi1: 20
Average Placement: 10.857
Total Points: 76
Standard Deviation: 5.521 (10th Lowest)

All the urgent care places are closed right now. Personally, I don’t think my symptoms are doctor worthy. However, eye stuff is very serious and not to be taken lightly.
For background I have always been nearsighted. I cannot see far away. No diagnosis of astigmatism, despite lights always looking fuzzy and bright at night. Recently in the last year I started daily contacts. I have been wearing them daily. I have always had a little issue with them drying out after 5* hours, so I have relubricating drops I keep on hand.
In the last month, it seems my vision has gradually gotten blurrier. I have had to squint much more to see. In the past few months I have also noticed I have an extreme sensitivity to lights at night noticeably more than ever. Often when vehicles are oncoming I lose the ability to see the lines on the road; everything is overtaken by the headlights. Additionally, my eyes seem much more sensitive to aibreeze.
In the 3 days I have developed a dull pain in my right eye. I felt around my orbital bone/eye socket and cannot feel any bruising from an impact/blunt force. It feels like it is almost on the top half of my eyeball. Barely noticeable most of the time, but can feel when blinking. Currently my eyes appear more bloodshot than normally, despite barely any computer usage or comparable sources of strain. Often times my vision may seem cloudy, but blinking a couple times can usually solve it. Both my pupils look normal. I covered my eyes, then uncovered them in a bright room to measure my pupil constriction/dilation and there was no abnormal pain or discomfort present. They appeared to work fairly quickly as well.
Shortly, I am going to remove my contacts and rely on my glasses in an attempt to identify changes in symptoms. I will add an update later on my findings.
Thank you for any feedback you have. Normally I would have let this be. However, a quick read online would tell you to immediately visit an emergency room and scream as loud as you can for help.
UPDATE: Just observed my pupils are unequal. Will be going to the hospital first thing in the morning.

"Thunderclap, will you fucking stop that?" Green Growler said.
"Uggghhhh, stop what?" Thunderclap replied.
"That isn't him, that is your own pulse in your head dumbass." Esperelda, the mind sharing martian maiden said, she was usually far kinder. Green growler cocked an eyebrow at her in surprise and mouthed 'dumbass?' at Thunderclap, who only shrugged. Then the martian vomited, blue, so much blue. She'd tried to share their last party member's mind, but she was still whirling drunk.
The woman on the ground was called Kickass Karen, she was... well, a kind of generic super. Super strong, but not like... punch the planet in half strong or anything. Just bending steel beams and jumping over medium size buildings in a single bound, strong. No flight powers or laser eyes, but she could run about as fast a car on the freeway in short bursts, but a motorcycle might get away, however clearly she did not have super alcohol tolerance. Oh, she was also mildy bullet resistant. Small caliber tended to bounce off her, but she was hit in the hand with a .50 cal sniper rifle once, and it broke a bunch of her hand bones but only left a small cut on her skin.
Esperelda was the only one on her feet. When she stood up a handful of cows in the pasture noticed them, and started coming over.
"Mooooo!" Thunderclap said to them as they walked up. He slapped himself slightly in the face. A barbarian of a man in all ways, but still a little too hungover for that. He groaned, regretting slapping his own face.
Green Growler turned himself into a green housecat. Any predator would do, but he didn't want to startle the cows by being a tiger or something big. "Is Karen alright?" He said as a cat.
She lifted up her head at hearing her name. "I'll live. Ugggghhh my head. I swear to Mrs Infinity, I'm never drinking again. What even happened last night?"
Kickass Karen sat up, her bob hair cut somehow still immaculate. Super hair. A digital camera dropped from her chest and landed in her lap.
Esperelda, being the least hungover by far, asked, "What is that device? Is that a camera? Perhaps it'll have some clues as to how we ended up in this state."
Karen tossed it to her and then rolled over onto all fours and threw up. Super threw up. Sitting up was a super mistake.
Thunderclap staggered to his feet and made himself busy petting the cows. Using them to keep his balance too. He was still drunk, hungover for sure, but also still drunk. "There's a plume of black smoke rising over the horizon."
"Oh no..." Esperelda said, looking at the last couple of pictured they'd taken before jumping from what looked like a private jet they'd stolen. "That's probably the airplane we jumped out of."
Kickass Karen groaned. "That must be why I feel like I shit."
Green Growler jumped awkwardly up onto Esperelda's shoulder, ended up needing to use far more claws to get his perch than he meant to. "Shit sorry, sorry, sorry. I was just trying to get a view of the camera."
"You were trying to not have to walk yourself." Esperelda said settling him on her shoulders, "I don't even need to use my Martian Mind powers to know that."
Thunderclap laughed. "She's got you there bud."
"Good Lord! Delete that immediately." Growler said to Esperelda looking at a picture of him being ridden as a tiger by three scantily clad women.
"Did you see this one?" She scrolled back the other way. Taking them later in the night, this one showed him having his belly pet by a handful of nude party goers.
"Okay, so what the fuck happened last night?"the Green cat said, "Go back toward the start."
"I am, I am. Look at this one." Esperelda showed him a picture of him as a green tiger licking a woman's back.
"Delete that too." Growled the Green feline.
"In the mean time we should head toward that plume of smoke in case people there need our help." Kickass Karen said. She tried to stand and immediately regretted it.
"Use a cow." Thunderclap told her, helping her up to lean on his while he staggered to the next one. "Good cows."
They were good cows. Friendly cows. The one Karen was leaned against licked her face. "I'm tellin your manager you're licking the customers." She joked.
As they walked toward the plume of black smoke, Esperelda and Green Growler put together the story of the previous night. They'd ended the night by crashing a plane, but before that they had had a wild night of debauchery... or maybe interrupted a wild night of debauchery and joined it. About half way through the camera roll the four of them stopped even being there. It was however pretty obvious that the revelry the people on camera before them was having was... well very illegal. It makes sense that they showed up.
"Look at this guy. He's in the background a bunch later in the night too. He's always there." Growler commented from Esperelda's shoulder, "Is he wearing horns? Or are those really part of his head."
"In some of the pictures he doesn't have them, and in other's... Oh it's when he's not looking at the camera, that he does." She said.
"I dunno how you two are looking at a screen right now." Karen said. Thunderclap grunted his agreement.
"Well, based on what we've seen, you two drank a magnificent amount, far more than either of us. Also Martians process alcohol much faster than humans. And Growler's his own weirdness."
"Hey, I'm not weird." The green talking cat said.
"Shape shifting green blob from outer space, that can only become predatory creatures... not weird at all." Karen said, and they all shared a good-natured laugh, and then groan at their head aches.
Esperelda kept flicking through the camera roll and finally coming to the begining, "The guy with horns absolutely started the out of control part of the party. This camera started it's night at a divorce party some twenty somethings were holding for their friend. There were six pictures on it before he showed up in the background the first time. And then things start to get wildly out of control, and fast. Fifteen minutes from his first appearance to straight up nudity and drinking to excess. He seems to have riled up enough people to join him in whatever he was up to that he robbed both a bank and a museum with a drunken mob, and then we showed up."
"Scroll us back toward the end of the night now." The green cat said, "I missed most of the part where we stole a plane."
The four of them crested a small hill in the cow pasture, and saw the smoldering ruins of their airplane not too far away, on the other side of the home attached to this pasture. There were fire trucks around, emergency personnel all over the place.
"Ah, here it is. Horn man joined us in the airport." Esperelda said, and then flipped through some more, "Here's us drinking with the TSA agent, and another of us pouring shots into a pilot's mouth... oh dear."
"Horn man?" A familiar, yet unfamiliar voice said. "That's a terrible name. How about you kids call me 'The Reveler!'
There he was, the man from the camera roll, sitting up in the pasture with them, like he'd just woke up well rested. The bastard had no hangover. He only had horns on his head when you weren't looking right at him in person, and only on camera when he wasn't looking.
"Hey buddy, don't take this weird, but are you aware your legs are on backward?" Thunderclap said. Kickass Karen grunted in agreement.
The Reveler laughed. "You must still be quite drunk if you're able to see my true form, but they're just goat's legs. Now, I had a good time with you kids last night. You lot came to break up my party, but you joined me instead. I like that. Lets do it again soon."
A pair of women had broken away from the fire trucks and emergency personnel and was walking over to meet their little group in the cow pasture when The Reveler turned to leave. He took one step and vanished in a puff of smoke that smelled of wine and weed.
The two women walking over were identical. A pair of Mrs Infinitys. They walked over to help Thunderclap and Kickass Karen to stagger out of the cow pasture and give them a hand getting over the fence. Esperelda set Green Growler on a fence post and hopped over herself, and then re-collected the cat.
When the two aliens turned back to face the humans, both Kickass Karen and Thunderclap were crying and apologizing to the Mrs Infinitys. And they were both being very reassuring and promising the young supers they had done a good job.
"Oh no no my dears, you did great! That was an ultra omega triple S-level threat, and you four managed to get through the night without anyone getting killed, surprisingly enough. A lot of property damage and theft though. A lot. That's Pan for you though."
Kickass Karen swallowed hard and squeaked out, "Did you say Pan? Like the Greek God?"
Both Mrs Infinitys sighed. The one next to Karen spoke, "Yes, he resurrected a few years ago. Since then, twice a year at the spring and autumn equinox he goes out partying. Looks like he likes you four though."
She plucked a green rectangular business card from the back of Thunderclap's costume. It had 'The Reveler' pressed into it. "Ahh, I see he's come up with a new name for himself. Wonderful."
Esperelda knew better than to try to share minds with Mrs Infinity, so she asked, "Well what's next?"
"Electrolytes. Probably something greasy to eat, and a nap, I assume." She smiled, and the other one started talking. "But in six months I expect Pan comes calling on you four again, and I hope you'll be up to the task to keep him entertained again. As yet, we have no idea how to contain him."
Kickass Karen swore, and Mrs Infinity said, "Language, Miss Miller."
Karen laughed and then groaned because her head was pounding. "Sorry, but just a few minutes ago I swore on you that I'd never drink again... and well ain't that some shit that you of all people would show up to tell me I need to train for a drinkathon with literal Pan. At least its not Dionysus right?

My experience in doing Austin Community College "Truck Driving".
The class is a 8 weeks program that cost $4,950 in tuition (which its to good to be true) First 2 weekends at Saturday 8am - 5:00pm and Sunday 12pm-5:00pm. The program they contract with is Ancora for truckers which its dry bone easy that anyone can do for the lecture modules and tons of death by powerpoint slides. The problem was at the end of in class they never tell the students on how to pass the written test at the DMV only to be instructed on study the DPS Texas CDL handbook (178 pages) which lucky my classmate tell me about "CDL Prep" app which no kidding is word for word on the DMV test site.
After completing the written test, have to do DOT medical exam (cover with the tuition) *Do not saying any medical problem!!!* They are just people that want to know if you can read, hear, walk, and talk. If you do that may ruin your chance on being a trucker and not your physician. You will get your CLP card in the mail.
The remaining 6 weeks is behind the wheel over at San Marcos area Saturday & Sunday 7am-5:00pm. The trucks was in poor condition and the parking/trailer valves doesn't not pop out on 20-40psi valve have to reach 0 psi to have one of the valve pop out during the air break test. Didn't have a better understanding on pre trip/skill maneuver's due to my lazy instructor 40+years driving, Copenhagen spitting bottle, smoking bigot, and thinks the new generation are CDL holders not real truckers. I get some truckers have that mind set but give the newer generation a chance to learn not thrown out to the wolves. He wouldn't get in the truck to show me how to do the maneuvers and continue to yell till his face is bright cherry red. So I did what anyone would do... Youtube many videos on it and trail and error. I manage to learn the pre trip/ skill test by heart.
The last two days learning on the road was 5 hours (10 hours total). I didn't have enough time/skill to feel the ability to fully control the peterbilt will little experience. The 8 weeks completed and got a notification from Ancora stating *Congratulation you completed CDL program* Didn't feel like it and the instructor inform the students you have 3 days of testing over at DMV over New Braunfels and thats it!
The 3 days experience DMV
First day: I was lucky to get form A (Engine components) and when I was about to do the air brake test. The valve wasn't working properly when fanning the break the trailer brake didn't pop out during 20-40psi. Which my idiot self touch it and was automatic fail.
Second day: Successfully pass the pre trip and pass the skill test (hate the parallel parking). I was happy as hell until the road test. Hit the curb with the bottom tandem wheel when going out ( Look on google map at119 Conrads Ln, New Braunfels, TX 78130) which is an automatic fail.
Third final day: I feel defeated known I have little time on driving open road and was scared shitless on not trying to hit any cars when turning. So I went all or nothing attitude on driving on frontage road, highway, school zone, train rail, etc. Did great for a newbie until left turn and I went all the way to the left lane instead of the right.... I knew I mess up and failed.
I suck up my pride and pleaded with my instructor if I can retest again. Only to be told that's it and if you want to continue again. You have to pay the entire course again due to Ancora policy of retester. It wasn't fair that they give little time on driving and too heavily focused on pretrip/skill test. At the end I did my best and went out my comfort from the medical field (phlebotomist making $18 hr). It was a bummer reaching this far to be a trucker but realizing it was to good to be true on the price of the program.
To all the truckers out there, I give you mad respect and kudos of risking your tail bone. Its mess up on how you guys get disrespect by company/dispatch only to get little pay. Thanks for reading my journey and best of luck this year.

Michael crawled over the broken windshield glass and sandy dirt to his girlfriend, Sam. Every breath he took was labored as he inched over to her, he distantly felt the pain. He knew he had broken most of his ribs, his legs, and most of the bones in his left arm, but that was nothing compared to the injuries she had sustained being on the passenger side when it was struck.
Sweat mixed with the blood on his forehead, dripping into and making his eyes sting. Her breathing was becoming more and more shallow, as desperation welled in his mind. Their twisted wreck that was some distance away began to smoke, before flames began to lick from the inside of the hood.
“If any gods or demons can hear me, I beg of you, please. Please spare her life.” He hoarsely whispered. “I’ll give you anything, everything, just please. She has children who need her more than they need me.”
---OFFER ACCEPTED---
---YOU HAVE BEEN SELECTED FOR TRANSLOCATION---
The voice rolled through his mind like the deep and powerful rumblings of a storm.
Michael began to pass out, his vision slowly fading.
As the last rays of light hit his eyes, he saw her wounds closing to heal. His eyes rolled back.
________________________________________
---INITIATING GODSMARKED TRAINING---
He was standing somewhere. Somewhere? It was a void, neither light, nor dark, but –NULL–. He could still see himself, his hand in front of his face, wearing the same long black shirt and black cargo pants, despite the apparent lacking of light. He didn’t hurt anymore.
“Greeting [Godsmarked]. I am here to give you your training.”
Directly to his right, a few feet away from him, was a figure clad entirely in deep purple robes. Their hands were clothed in stunningly white gloves, while their hood obscured any attempts to discern the face inside.
“So, a god or multiple gods heard my offer, and took me up on it. I suppose I am here to render my payment,” Michael mused. “I’ll cry later for what I sacrificed on that altar. Who are you, and what do I need to train for?”
“I am Estoc, [Servant] of the Divines. You are being given training on how to utilize the most common magical elements of the plane you are being transported to, for the gods own amusement or some grander purpose. Who can say which one it is?” Estoc said as they shrugged, while their robe shifted shades of purple.
“Please be aware, this process may sting. The last [Godsmarked] complained quite loudly.” Estoc waved their hand, and Michael hissed with a sharp intake of air as if the crown of his skull were branded with an iron.
“The knowledge you have gained will give you the intrinsic ability to will a Status Window into being. This Status Window will display your classes, titles, certain physical attributes, injuries, magical power, and any skills gained from classes or titles. As you use this Status Window, you will grow in familiarity with its function, but all sapient beings of this realm are able to utilize this function from early childhood.
Classes represent pathways that grant access to active and passive skills over the course of a person’s development, representing their personal specialties and the applications of those specialties. Each adult has at least one class, and the limit is five, though as classes level up and synergies develop, classes may merge to become new classes opening up additional slots, as well as prompting the selection of a replacement class.
You are being transported to the realm of Tillania.
Good luck on your journey, Michael Judge.” Estoc tilted their head to the side as though listening to something, and in a lower register said, “Sam Iron will make a full recovery in the hospital.”
Michael dropped his chin to his chest, sniffed, and a tear rolled down his cheek. He sighed, and looked back up, only to see that Estoc was gone. He wiped his face, and steeled himself for the possibilities.
---GODSMARKED TRAINING COMPLETED---
---CALCULATING CLASS CHOICES---
The white words appeared on the white bordered black Status Window that appeared in front of him.
---CALCULATION COMPLETE. CLASS OPTIONS ARE AS FOLLOWS. SELECT TWO---
-[Magus (Fungus)]
-[Magus (Necromancy)]
-[Medic]
-[Soldier]
-[Priest]
-[Clerk]
-[Trader]
Michael stared at the screen and let his thoughts wander over why these were his choices. The fungus mage felt a little on the nose, he had been devoted to a decentralized religion that revered psilocybin as its sacrament, and experimented with his own. The Soldier was from his time in the Army. Trader from working a certain general store chain with the word “Dollar” in it when he was young and poor. Priest was from his time studying religion and coaching others. Medic from his time working in the hospital as a laboratory technician, and in the army with a medical brigade support battalion.
He didn’t want to be a priest, or a fungus mage, at least not at first. Soldier, while useful, didn’t lend itself to the role he wanted to see himself in. But necromancy? He thought it over some more as to why that was the case.
The modern concept of necromancy involved raising the dead, zombies, skeletons, ghouls, disturbing the dead. The classical concept, however, was involved with any magic associated with dead flesh, including magic meant to investigate health conditions or divine futures from stool, skin, muscle tissue, urine, or blood. He had been steeped in tabletop roleplaying games, as well as classical myths of the various kinds of undead, and the various kinds of necromancers. It would seem, then, that this world would occasionally have to deal with the existence of undead. If that were the case, he thought that he might have a better time being able to sell himself as an expert on preventing and exorcising them. He had always been in love with the idea of the undead, though he thought that it would probably be more socially acceptable if he didn’t create any.
As to the other class? He felt most at home being able to treat others.
---CLASS CHOICES ACCEPTED---
---GENERATING CLASS SKILLS---
[MAGUS (NECROMANCER)] Level 1
PASSIVES
[SANCTUARY] Non-sapient undead will not target you until you take a hostile action against them.
[LIFESIGHT] Entities that are either alive or undead have their profiles outlined. Dead organic material is also outlined. Can be willed on or off, or to adjust the color of the profile outlines.
ACTIVES
[BLACK BOLT] Safely hold or throw a black gathering of magical energy that greatly accelerates and feeds the metabolism of microbial entities on a targeted area. Range: ≤50m. Mana cost [Medium-Low]
[GRAVESPEAK] You may speak with dead entities or non-sapient undead entities. Mana Cost: [Low]
[MEDIC] Level 1
PASSIVES
[FIRST AID] Additional proficiency with Medical tools and techniques. Scales with level.
ACTIVES
[TRIAGE] Reveals certain status information from a target. Range ≤8m. Mana Cost: [Very Low]
[BASIC MENDING] Manipulate a living entity to alter an injury and/or repair damage. Limited to physical trauma. Range: ≤1m. Mana Cost: [Low]
[HEMATOLOGY] Reveals very specific status information based on the inquiry of the user. Material Component: Requires 25 µL of blood. Range ≤1m. Mana Cost: [Medium-High]
---CLASS SKILLS GENERATED. YOU HAVE BEEN GRANTED TWO BOONS AS COMPENSATION FOR BEING REMOVED FROM YOUR LOCAL REALM---
---BOON 1 DISPENSED---
Title: [Godsmarked] – Imparts several passives on the title holder.
Boon: [Reformation] – Physical ailments and deformities have been healed.
Michael blinked. His vision had improved, and he put away his glasses. For some reason, his thoughts came clearer to him as well.
Passive Skill: [Heaven’s Bounty] – You may receive additional objects from defeated foes.
Passive Skill: [Speak in Tongues] – Proficiency in vernacular languages of new realm provided.
Passive Skill: [Quest] – Patrons may provide you with tasks and rewards.
Passive Skill: [Titled] – You have a greater chance of receiving titles than normal.
Passive Skill: [Regenerative] – You heal more quickly than usual, to the point where, given enough time, you may even regrow a limb.
Active Skill: [Cargo Space] – Integrated inventory function in status window. Mana Cost: [None]
---BOON 2 DISPENSED. CHOOSE FROM PERSONALLY OWNED ITEMS IN FORMER REALM AS EQUIPMENT. MUST FIT IN INVENTORY OR OWN PERSON---
Michael thought about it. He would bring his laptop, cellphone, solar chargers and batteries. He knew it would be a long while before they could be repaired if they were ever damaged, but some utility was better than no utility, and out of curiosity he had previously downloaded a number of technical medical manuals from the time that he wanted to pursue a doctorate in pathology, as well as the children’s book “The way it works” which described the other areas of machines he wasn’t familiar with in an easily digestible format.
With any luck, and enough time, he might run into an engineer that might enjoy having access to that information. If there was other magic in this world he might be able to trade access to it for various repairs. Or, perhaps he would get around to finally tinkering himself, he wasn’t closing himself off to any options.
An SAS survival book with many different handy tips and tricks for wilderness survival. Various tools, a hammer, a machete, a first aid kit and a repurposed fishing box he filled with various medicines for most common ailments. A pocket survival kit including a ferrite rod and various other small tools. A flashlight that had a solar charger as well as a crank charger with charging ports.
He was surprised to see that it also included items that he was no longer certain as to where they were. He had owned a 50-pound draw weight compound bow some time ago that was left with a family member, as well as twenty barbed hunting arrows. It was given to him as a gift from his father and grandfather, though he never really was a fan of hunting. He stimmed, shaking his hand and striking his thumb against his middle and forefinger while he thought, before moving to the other hand stimulation exercises he did whenever he got excited or deep in thought.
Finally the water backpack, rucksack, treatment tabs, and a few old army uniforms that still fit would round out the space. Previously, he had been concerned that his job really didn’t assist him with maintaining a healthy weight, but if this was going where he anticipated it might, his extra bulk would serve him well until he could become better established.
Michael Judge ([Medic] Level 1; [Magus (Necromancy)] Level 1)
Health: 100% Mana: 100% Stamina: 100%
Conditional Status: [Well-Rested]; [Well-Fed]
Titles: [Godsmarked]
Boons: [Reformation]
Passive Skills: [Heaven’s Bounty]; [Speak in Tongues]; [Quest]; [Titled]; [Regenerative]; [Sanctuary]; [Lifesight]; [First Aid]
Active Skills: [Black Bolt] ; [Gravespeak] ; [Triage]; [Basic Mending]; [Hematology]
Inventory (Open? [Y/N])
Message Log (Open? [Y/N])
[CONFIRM]
He exhaled, his finger hovering over the [CONFIRM] button. “Only worry about the things in your control. I guess now is a good a time as any to have my agoge.”
________________________________________
He pressed the button. His vision was filled, piece by piece with his new location, though he didn’t feel himself moving. As the last piece fell into place, he could hear, and feel, the wind over the grass of the hilly plains. It was evening, and he measured the daylight remaining using his hand. He had a little over an hour and a half before sunset.
The whole area looked similar to the semi-arid environment of the hilly grasslands of western Kansas. If that was the case, he wondered to himself if this place was also a hellscape where the local flora and fauna rely on a steady stream of wildfires to maintain the ecosystem. The grass came up to his knees and his waste, which he didn’t particularly enjoy. The sturdy stems were always difficult to sleep on, from his experience with the army. Not to mention what could be hiding in the grass.
… Hiding in the grass? He willed his [Lifesight] to become active and his vision became frantically populated with green profiles. He shut his eyes, willing [Lifesight] to have a few parameters. He could see a status window behind his eyelids. It felt like mentally right-clicking a skill and opening the properties menu.
________________________________________
[Adjust] [Lifesight]
Toggle light green profile if living entity is ≥30 cm at ranges 1m-500m. Increase color saturation with higher vitality. If living entity is 1-30 cm, highlight profile at ≤1m.
Toggle light red profile if entity is undead. Increase color saturation with higher durability.
Toggle yellow profile for dead organic material belonging to the Animal Kingdom if material is ≥30 cm within a range of 1-500m. ________________________________________
He opened his eyes. This time he wasn’t as bombarded with information. He’d have to keep this on a toggle, or with only one eye. Now he didn’t have to worry about bugs filling his vision with a sea of green. He did however, notice a few red outlines hovering slowly over the ground spaced out here and there. He could also see yellow outlines buried in the ground here and there.
He toggled [Lifesight] off. It was useful to scan the area but he was still getting used to the information overload and he still had other more pressing issues to investigate.
Could he equip things directly from his status window? It took a few tries, but yes. He could will it, or he could open up an Equipment screen and mentally drag and drop an item where it should go. He equipped his uniform, boots, and his floppy red wide brimmed hat with a mushroom theme that came to a rearward facing conical tip. He also took out his sunscreen and drank a sip of water from his wearable water pouch.
What information is revealed by [Triage]? He tried it on himself while keeping his status sheet open. [Triage]: (Target: Michael Judge; Health: 100% ; Conditions: [None]; Injuries: None.) His Status Window still displayed the conditions of [Well-Fed] and [Well-Rested]. He took out a knife, rolled back his sleeve, and made a small cut on the top of his arm. A little blood flowed as he did. The [Triage] and Status Sheet both updated. [Triage]: (Target: Michael Judge; Health: 98% ; Conditions: [None]; Injuries: Cut {Posterior Arm, 5 cm.) He held his hand over his arm as a light sweat began to form on his forehead from the sun. An ocean blue glow spread from his palm, as he willed the wound to close up like a zipper. He felt a small drain on his magic, and confirmed that indeed, his magic had dropped by 5%. There was no indication that there had ever been a wound on his skin. He summoned a notepad and pen, noting the information, before willing it back into his inventory.
Next, he used [Hematology] on the blood for a Complete Blood Count. He felt a much stronger pull on his magic than with [Triage]. He confirmed that indeed, his magic had dipped to 50%. He made a note of it as well as what the CBC provided: WBC Count, RBC count, RBC morphology, WBC differential, platelet count and morphology.
He took out a small umbrella and started walking, occasionally flipping [Lifesight] on and off. He manifested [Black Bolt] as he walked, holding it in his right hand. His magic had dipped by 10%, but would recover the used 10% when he stopped manifesting it. Only by actually throwing it did the mana stay consumed. More and more interesting, He thought. After about 40 minutes of walking, he discovered a well-trodden path, with tell-tale wagon ruts and horse dung that was neither fresh nor completely dry. He couldn’t see any smoke on the horizon, so it was likely more than 20 miles to the next settlement. He picked a direction and started walking that way.
As the sun dipped below the horizon he was left with a question. Would he camp, or keep walking through the dark? It’s not like things could sneak up on him at night if they were coming from somewhere he could see.
He kept walking, following the road by twilight, and then moonlight. He paused, however, when he saw a moderately red outline hunched over on the road in front of him. It had to be just within 500m of him. Michael materialized his bow and an arrow, nocking it, and approaching quietly.
250 meters. 200. 150. Lips smacked, cartilage crunched, wet and sticky, as it murmured and growled with hunger. 125. 100. His boot clattered a rock.
The munching stopped. Glowing yellow eyes piercing the dark. It walked on all fours. All sixes? 75. 60. 50. It stood on its back legs, growing taller and taller as it stretched its back, sniffing the air. Rotting scales. Exposed bones. Viscera exposed with fresh meat oozing from its ruptured stomach. Elongated face like a monitor lizard. And as the breeze blew through the grass, Michael realized he had made a critical mistake.
He was upwind.
With a nasty series of clicks, it charged forward. 40. He was shaking, pulling back the bowstring. 15. He couldn’t get a clear shot, its gait was serpentine! 5!
[SANCTUARY ACTIVATED]

I’m curious how much a 2 week course of Famotidine might have impacted these results because I don’t really have noticeable GI issues. I can’t get in to my ND for 2 weeks to go over these results so hoping for some advice here.
SIgA low: 470 Anti-gliadin IgA high: >500 Firmicutes high: 4.23e11 Bacteroidetes high: 7.44e12 Akkermansia low:

Everything else in range.
Context:
2 months ago I had a vaginal yeast infection and was prescribed 2 doses of Fluconazole 200 mg that caused a severe reaction (severe diarrhea for 8 hrs, vomiting, hives on face, neck, arms, throat tightness/itchiness) so I was switched to 2 courses of Monistat in case it was an allergic reaction (never had a reaction to it in the past). Swab culture showed yeast was cleared.
However, after the Fluconazole reaction I had lingering esophagus/throat redness/itching, high anxiety, cotton mouth, dry mucosa everywhere, mouth ulcers in gums and on tonsils, and diarrhea. I had none of these symptoms prior to Fluconazole. I did a 5-day Prolon fast that stopped the diarrhea before seeing GP who suspected GERD. She had me do a 2 week course of Pepcid 40 mg/day. Symptoms (cotton mouth, burning throat, mouth ulcers) improved for a few days, then worsened. I stopped it after 2 weeks and got a 2nd opinion from a ND.
I suspected oral/esophageal thrush. ND had me do GI Map (prior to any other treatment), then agreed to start me on an anti fungal protocol while waiting on results because at that point it had been 6 weeks of a burning mouth/throat. I had 8 months of antibiotics in 2022 due to a chronic UTI (hormone related and now resolved), so suspected something was off. I also have a long history of sinusitis and use Flonase daily which can cause oral thrush (though I’ve never experienced it before). I thought I had a sinus infection in February, my ENT scoped and said it was fine, just post nasal drip.
Given the reaction to Fluconazole, ND prescribed an oral Amphotericin B “low and slow” protocol, increasing dosage over 3 weeks. Within 24 hours I had the same reaction as I had to Fluconazole, but much milder, so I proceeded. After 3 days, hives went away but I had massive yellow mucus from sinuses that subsided after 3 more days (by day 8 of treatment), but with lingering congestion and mild drainage. It’s been 14 days of treatment (2 months since this all began), and I just got the results. I’m now wondering if there is a bacterial sinus infection. Dr. doesn’t want to start me on antibiotics without seeing me but I can’t go on like this for 2 more weeks - considering an urgent care visit. But also don’t want to further mess up my gut health.
Diet the past 2 months (with a few slip ups of pizza/wine early on) - lots of veg, fish, chicken, bone broths, Greek yogurt (only dairy), berries, eggs, wild rice, quinoa, raw saur kraut. No sugar other than berries. No reactions to any foods and pretty normal stools/GI symptoms. I had a Lymphocytic Colitis diagnosis 3 years ago, but all symptoms resolved after I started doing quarterly fasts the past 2 years - my body feels great during and after fasts. Taking L-Glutamine, Glutathione, Ampho B, biofilm busters, Sacro B, and Klaire Factor 4 probiotics.
Should I worry about the GI Map results or just try to get treatment for what seems like a sinus infection? I’m still on the Ampho B but now wonder if I should stop that too since no yeast is showing up. It’s been a frustrating and expensive 2 months!
Thanks for reading!

This is a compilation of two days' worth of testing & reviewing perfumes from Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab that I previously left in Indie of the Day comments. Please keep in mind that these are "first impression" style reviews, so I can't comment on throw or wear length. With the exception of I Know You're Watching Me, everything here came as a free sample included with my orders, and will be available in the GC.
Day 1
A Countenance Foreboding Evil (Patchouli, ylang ylang, blood orange, and vetiver). I didn't like this when I first received it, with no idea of the scent notes. Coming back to it today wasn't any better. Sweet and musty. Like an old attic that hasn't been kept totally dry. Dusty, fussy, and sickly sweet. Not a winner for me. I'm very patchouli skeptical and hate oranges. I vaguely recall maybe disliking ylang ylang as well. We just weren't meant to be. Destash.
Depraved (Earthy black patchouli swelling with apricot). There wasn't really hope for this one either. I don't loathe it, though. The apricot is nice and I could see how this might work for me layered with something else. The apricot has a nice tanginess to it that brightens the patchouli enough to be tolerable. Husband thinks it smells like vitamin C tablets. Probably nice on someone else. Destash.
Hecate (Deep, buttery almond layered over myrrh and dark musk). I was excited by the name alone and applied without checking the notes first. Internal monologue on applying this went something like, "Jesus that's sweet. Bubblegum? Or is it fruit punch!? Wtf am I smelling?" Then 10 seconds later, "Oh I like this what's in it 🥺". The almond is intense in the bottle but immediately calms down upon application. It's rich without being foodie. This one oozes confidence; sensual without being lusty. Piercing eyes and a quick wit. A very adult fragrance that says "I have arrived". The myrrh is resinous rather than dry. A hint of citrus brightens things up just a bit and the musk keeps everything grounded and warm and full. Absolutely lovely. Keeping.
Jezebel (A gloriously decadent blend of honey, roses, orange blossom and sandalwood). My nose must be getting better. I was able to identify honey, and not-quite-orange off the bat without the scent notes. This one is very smiley. A bright, happy fragrance. Positivity liquefied. Sunshine and flowers in your hair and an unselfconscious toothy grin. The rose and honey are so beautifully matched here, and the orange blossom is pretty and just east of true citrus. The sandalwood feels like an afterthought, but may simply be playing a supporting role to allow the rest of the notes to flourish. I'll wear this on days I need a feminine pick-me-up. Keeping.
Black Annis (A mixture of damp cave lichen and oak leaf with a hint of vetiver, civet and anise). I remembered liking this in the imp so I put it on without much further thought or care. It goes on spicy, almost smoky. There's a bite to it that's adjacent to black pepper. Later I forgot what I was wearing and was surprised to find I smelled black licorice - ah yes, anise. This one is complex. Musky, sweet, spicy, earthy, rich. There is a lot going on, but it's oddly harmonious. I think I like it, but Black Annis is such a singular experience that I can't quite wrap my head around it yet. This one will need further testing to be fully appreciated. In limbo.
Urd (Muscadine, black and red patchouli, cereus and nag champa). This imp was poorly behaved and splortched all over the side of the bottle upon opening. I instinctively spread the spillage onto my hand and wrist so as not to waste it. After 2 minutes I smelled like a headshop and promptly scrubbed it off. "Urd" might be exactly what came out of my mouth while crinkling my nose. 😖 Destash.
Jack (True Halloween pumpkin, spiced with nutmeg, glowing peach and murky clove). After my Urd experience, I decided to actually check the notes before diving in with this one. To me, Jack smells just like a fall themed candle from a place like Bath & Body Works. Maybe the candle is called Autumn Sweater. It's sweet. It's spiced. I don't know that I can smell pumpkin, but I don't know that I can't smell pumpkin - just like the candle. I feel like I've met the kind of woman who loves this perfume for fall. She's a perfectly lovely person, but we find we don't have much to say to each other. Destash.
Black Tower (Long-dead soldiers, oath-bound; the perfume of their armor, the chill wind that surges through their tower, white bone and blackened steel: white sandalwood, ambergris, wet ozone, galbanum and leather with ebony, teak, burnt grasses, English ivy and a hint of red wine). My last scent for the day. I let a friend sample this imp and liked it on them. I'm glad I gave it a try myself because I adore this. These long dead soldiers are ghostly, not embodied. The burnt grass and ozone in this add a perfect crispness to an otherwise heady scent. The smell has a vapor-like quality to it somehow. Like picking up a scent in the breeze after rain. The metal in this is gorgeous. I love BPAL's metallic notes and this is no exception. The ivy and wine sweeten things up just enough to keep this from feeling dismal. It feels like looking out on the sea from a high window in a drafty tower, wrapped in a thick shawl and holding a leather journal you're about to pour your heart out to. Gorgeous. I want 6 bottles of this. Keeping.
Day 2
I Know You're Watching Me (A smear of flushed, pearly skin musk splashed by a sophisticated vintage aldehyde perfume and drenched in the secretions of high-pitched arousal). I looked high and low for a decant of this. Upon application, it smells like extremely fragrant laundry. The way you dream your laundry would smell when your maids are finished washing and neatly folding it. As it dries, I start to get the faintest hint of honey, then something savory, but it's lurking quietly behind the aldehydes, which are now giving the impression of something almost lemony -but there's definitely no lemon. After some time I'm not sure if I'm getting the skin musk or secretions, but I'm definitely smelling a person. It smells like skin that is just developing a light sheen of salty sweat from exertion. It's sensual and absolutely lusty. But the bright, breathy aldehydes keep this very wearable as a daily perfume. It's perfectly clean and perfectly dirty at the same time. A housewife consumed by daydreams of carnal animal passion. Shockingly true to the description. Keeping & upgrading to full size.
Anteros (Throbbing red musk and shimmering chypre with saffron, sweet patchouli, Italian bergamot, red currant, and vanilla bean). Off the bat, the red musk is front and center, smelling of a swirling blend of warm, dry spices. The bergamot peeks out fairly quickly, smelling of orange wood. I almost don't recognize the chypre, as the spices totally dry it out. Anteros begins to take on a traditionally masculine quality at around this point. I get a hint of the patchouli but no red currant at all, which I'm pretty disappointed about. I think a bit of fruit juice would really brighten this up and round it out. The overall effect for me is bitter, dry spices and woods. It does seem to liven up a bit after a longer wear, but I've got a masculine-leaning chypre that I prefer on myself. Passing this on to my husband.
Harlot's House (Angel's trumpet, violet, white sandalwood, oude, copaiba balsam, angelica, white tea, olibanum, and oakmoss). This goes on as a riotous, bright floral. Sweet and lively. These harlots aren't the sultry, seductive type. They're sitting on bar tops and telling tall tales. They're doing the can-can while breathless with giddy laughter. Flushed and beaming and one more round of drinks. The olibanum gives a tartness to the florals, while the oak moss and sandalwood add a touch of sophistication. Truly lovely, upbeat, and with surprising depth. The angel's trumpet is simply gorgeous in this. On me this is a scent for leveraging feminine wiles and exercising inconspicuous power. However, my husband also enjoyed wearing this one. Keeping.
Mag Mell (The warmth of amber, the puissance of white ginger and the clarity of verbena, with fresh green grass, lush sage and cleansing droplets of summer rain). This goes on wet like a bar soap with the word "zest" or "spring" in the name. As it dries down, a wave of verbena threatens to overtake everything else. Luckily the verbena settles down almost as quickly as it appears, allowing the grass and sage to come out to play. The whole effect is very green, crisp, and breezy. The ginger only just peeks out here and there, very elusive and almost shy. I think it's the summer rain component that gives the "clean" impression. This would be a perfect scent on a sweltering day. With further wear, the bright herbaceous plant matter is softened by the amber. I think this would be an easy go-to during the warmer months for any gender. Keeping.
Port Royal (Spiced rum and ship’s wood mixed with the body-warmed trace of a prostitute’s perfume and a hint of salty sea air on the dry-down). My initial thoughts are "bitch, you smell like rum". Suffice to say, this is very rum-forward on application. It does feel like a beach party scent. You've got a hibiscus flower in your hair and by the end of the night you can't tell what's perfume and what's real rum, and you don't care. The wood in this isn't overbearing, it gives me the impression of the wood planks of a coastal pier; weather worn and salt crusted. Not sure if this scent is for me, but I'll give it another go on a warm day. In limbo.
Bayou (Spanish moss, evergreen and cypress with watery blue-green notes and an eddy of hothouse flowers and swamp blooms). This is all floral on me, with evergreen & cypress playing second fiddle somewhere in the background. It's a scent that feels humid, like sitting on the back porch and fanning yourself as you pick up the scent of trees heavy with blooming gardenias. I think I pick up other white florals as well, maybe jasmine. I am missing the water, the bayou itself, almost entirely. Gimme that murky swamp water. This is pretty, but I can't see myself reaching for it often. I'll use up this imp's ear but won't repurchase. Keeping.