with 180 episodes you'd think in one of the standup openings Jerry would say whats the deal with (insert observation here) but nope only after Larry David left does he say it and even then its ironic "whats the deal with airplane peanuts?" in a George Costanza thought bubble also whats the deal with cancer also a self aware joke about the seemingly synonymous catchphrase with his second most famous line who are these people? only being jokingly referred to in his 1998 post-Seinfeld special im telling you for the last time in which he semi-retired old material where the phrase was said in a sketch set at a funeral

In this section, we see Huram of Tyre carry out Solomon's instructions for the temple's furnishings.
¹³ King Solomon sent to Tyre and brought Huram,^\)^g\) ¹⁴ whose mother was a widow from the tribe of Naphtali and whose father was from Tyre and a skilled craftsman in bronze. Huram was filled with wisdom, with understanding and with knowledge to do all kinds of bronze work. He came to King Solomon and did all the work assigned to him.
¹⁵ He cast two bronze pillars, each eighteen cubits high and twelve cubits in circumference.^\)^h\) ¹⁶ He also made two capitals of cast bronze to set on the tops of the pillars; each capital was five cubits^\)^i\) high. ¹⁷ A network of interwoven chains adorned the capitals on top of the pillars, seven for each capital. ¹⁸ He made pomegranates in two rows^\)^j\) encircling each network to decorate the capitals on top of the pillars.^\)^k\) He did the same for each capital. ¹⁹ The capitals on top of the pillars in the portico were in the shape of lilies, four cubits^\)^l\) high. ²⁰ On the capitals of both pillars, above the bowl-shaped part next to the network, were the two hundred pomegranates in rows all around. ²¹ He erected the pillars at the portico of the temple. The pillar to the south he named Jakin^\)^m\) and the one to the north Boaz.^\)^n\) ²² The capitals on top were in the shape of lilies. And so the work on the pillars was completed.
²³ He made the Sea of cast metal, circular in shape, measuring ten cubits from rim to rim and five cubits high. It took a line of thirty cubits^\)^o\) to measure around it. ²⁴ Below the rim, gourds encircled it—ten to a cubit. The gourds were cast in two rows in one piece with the Sea.
²⁵ The Sea stood on twelve bulls, three facing north, three facing west, three facing south and three facing east. The Sea rested on top of them, and their hindquarters were toward the center. ²⁶ It was a handbreadth^\)^p\) in thickness, and its rim was like the rim of a cup, like a lily blossom. It held two thousand baths.^\)^q\)
²⁷ He also made ten movable stands of bronze; each was four cubits long, four wide and three high.^\)^r\) ²⁸ This is how the stands were made: They had side panels attached to uprights. ²⁹ On the panels between the uprights were lions, bulls and cherubim—and on the uprights as well. Above and below the lions and bulls were wreaths of hammered work. ³⁰ Each standhad four bronze wheels with bronze axles, and each had a basin resting on four supports, cast with wreaths on each side. ³¹ On the inside of the stand there was an opening that had a circular frame one cubit^\)^s\) deep. This opening was round, and with its basework it measured a cubit and a half.^\)^t\)Around its opening there was engraving. The panels of the stands were square, not round. ³² The four wheels were under the panels, and the axles of the wheels were attached to the stand. The diameter of each wheel was a cubit and a half. ³³ The wheels were made like chariot wheels; the axles, rims, spokes and hubs were all of cast metal.
³⁴ Each stand had four handles, one on each corner, projecting from the stand. ³⁵ At the top of the stand there was a circular band half a cubit^\)^u\)deep. The supports and panels were attached to the top of the stand. ³⁶ He engraved cherubim, lions and palm trees on the surfaces of the supports and on the panels, in every available space, with wreaths all around. ³⁷ This is the way he made the ten stands. They were all cast in the same molds and were identical in size and shape.
1) Is the Huram mentioned in this section the same man brought up in 2 Chronicles 2:12-14? Or are these 2 different people? If it's the same man, why is the mother listed as coming from 2 different tribes?
2) We learn the fate of these pillars, the Sea and the movable stands in 2 Kings 25:13.
3) Why do you think Solomon named these pillars in verse 21? What is the significance (if any) of these names?
4) What exactly is this Sea and what is its purpose in the temple? Also, why is it called the Sea?
5) Anything else in this passage that stands out for you?

When the weather is good enough to sit outside: Ernesto’s, Silver Apricot, Popina For a fresh take on old school vibes: Frenchette, Antons, Don Angie, Ops, Hawksmoor For really delicious food that’s harder to find outside of NYC: Llama San/Llama Inn, Oiji Mi (like some other folks mentioned), Eyval, Claro
Basically anywhere in west village
Convivium Osteria. Ask to have a table downstairs. It will feel like you took a trip to a small, old, romantic restaurant in Italy. Best date night ever.
New York City is the place to fall—and stay—in love. And its most romantic restaurants play a major role in that process. A natural wine and pizza bar is perfect for early-in-the-game dates. For cozy evenings, check out an acclaimed Sichuan spot with booths galore. And few places are as proposal-worthy as the elegant townhouse interiors of an upscale Greenwich Village landmark.
This guide pairs NYC restaurants with romantic occasions from first dates all the way to milestone anniversaries. These are NYC’s 13 best date-night restaurants.
For a first date
Wildair (Lower East Side)
A pastry dish at NYC restaurant Wildair featuring layers of puff pastry and piped cream sandwiched in between
This drinks-forward, New American spot on the Lower East Side is for impressing a first date with cocktails, rare natural wines, and excellent snacky plates. If you’re not at full meal-status yet, go for bubbly and dessert. Or show up on the earlier side to test drive the sparks with crispy, uni-topped pommes darphin, best paired with Wildair’s spritz. If the vibe is right, splurge on the shareable American wagyu, arguably one of the city’s best under-the-radar steaks.
Holiday Cocktail Lounge (East Village)
What’s a better conversation starter than an 1835 speakeasy that’s hosted Madonna, Al Capone, and Frank Sinatra, to name just a few? Not to mention liquid courage in the form of Singapore slings, mai tais, negronis, and other classic cocktails all made at a charming, circular bar in the center. Keep the night going by pairing your drinks with inventive snacks like kielbasa and kimchi tacos or the meaty and cheesy Cubano doughnut.
Bar Birba (Bed-Stuy)
Bar Birba is where you go for a date night that shuttles you to a charming Italian seaside cafe with marble-topped tables and menus on mirrors. The Bed-Stuy bar is the newest spot from the natural wine experts at For All Good Things, so you can expect a strong vino game. Choose from a generous selection that spotlights Italian producers and make it a full-on aperitivo date by getting fluffy mini pizzas and snacks like mushroom and pecorino-cheese arancinis.
For a second date
Modern Love Brooklyn (Williamsburg)
Exposed lights, bistro-style tables, and minimalist wall murals—Modern Love is an industrial-chic spot that was made for a budding romance. That’s because the vegan comfort food, like creamy acorn squash curry and cacio e pepe with fried mozzarella, is even better when shared. Pick from a strong wine and beer selection, and strongly consider splitting one of the milkshakes made with cashew olive oil ice cream to cap off a special second date.
For a cozy and intimate evening
Moko (East Village)
Establishing a regular romantic ritual—aka a recurring date night—is easy at this sushi hotspot. The 15-course omakase at Moko is fueled with fresh-from-Japan seafood. Your nigiri and miso soup feast ends with a scoop of housemade strawberry ice cream, leaving you pleasantly full (but not stuffed), and ready to come back.
HUPO (Long Island City)
Don’t let the unassuming exterior fool you; just past Hupo’s door is a stylish, cozy restaurant full of Chinese lantern-style lights and the irresistible scent of spicy Sichuan food. You and your date can easily be satisfied with staples like Chungking chicken, mapo tofu, and double-cooked pork, but for a more intimate experience, go all out with the choose-your-own-adventure-style mala dry hot pot.
For an adventurous and transportive date
Amor Cubano (Harlem)
This East Harlem favorite shuttles couples to 1950s Havana with an extra-large bar and wall projections of classic cars and vibrant streetscapes, which all add up to a laid-back and unpretentious date. Plus, Amor Cubano is a go-to for generous portions of hearty Cuban food. Think croquetas filled with ham, cheese, or chicken, a knockout Cuban sandwich, and braised classics like ropa vieja. Take your restaurant getaway to new heights by joining in on some after-dinner dancing—there’s often live music here.
For a group date
Mesiba (Williamsburg)
Mesiba means “party” in Hebrew, which explains why you want to bring a crew here. The plant-filled ceiling and undulating purple banquettes are mesmerizing, and so is the massive Levantine menu. Rip and dip Moroccan bread in creamy hot sauce, break off bites of tender lamb with Yemeni pancakes, and wash it all down with a Turkish coffee-infused old fashioned. Keep the party going with arak service—Mesiba pours out six kinds of the popular anise liqueur.
For an evening of eatertainment
Journey (NoMad)
The mood lighting, comfy leather couches, and globally influenced food are almost secondary at Journey—the star attractions are the four different immersive dining experiences, making for an unforgettable date night. Whether it’s augmented reality on tables, projections of far-off cities on the walls, or 3-D models of famous buildings from around the world, a meal at Journey will keep you guessing, giving you a romantic evening that’s one for the books.
For an anniversary or romantic milestone
Gaonnuri (Midtown West)
You’ll find both a special-occasion meal and stunning NYC views at this 39th-floor Korean barbecue spot. Request a seat by the window to make Gaonnuri’s five-course tasting menu even more fun. Servers prepare prime and wagyu ribeye on the tabletop grills; level things up by adding an order of decadent lobster-and-kimchi fried rice to your meal. Cocktails, fine wines, and soju provide plenty of fuel for celebratory toasts.
Enzo’s of Williamsbridge (Morris Park)
White tablecloths, framed photos of Italian movie stars, and top-notch service all promise an elegant date night at this Bronx legend. The fall-off-the-bone tender chicken scarpariello is a must-order, as are the more than dozen housemade pastas like cavatelli with broccoli rabe and sausage. They’re best when devoured with Enzo’s extensive lineup of Italian wines for a next-level night out worthy of a big anniversary.
For a proposal-worthy place
One if by Land, Two if by Sea (Greenwich Village)
With a charming name from a historical poem, One if by Land, Two if by Sea is for milestone moments—so it’s no surprise that wedding proposals happen here all the time. The restaurant takes up a historic carriage house on a pretty West Village street, and it’s tough to top the all-out romantic vibes at this special-occasion star. Fittingly, the three- and seven-course tasting menus channel a swanky wedding menu with choices like beef Wellington, seared foie gras, and chocolate soufflé.
The River Cafe (DUMBO)
Few places can top the proposal-ready views that DUMBO’s River Cafe boasts—after all, it overlooks the Brooklyn Bridge and the Manhattan skyline. The romantic feels start at the garden entrance, illuminated by twinkling lights. Once inside, fresh flowers and live piano music scream “special occasion.” It’s all amplified by an ultra-fancy menu of ricotta-stuffed rabbit loin or duck breast with roasted pearl onions. Take your date up a notch by adding caviar service to the mix.
Book now

Well the results are out and Modi Ji still is our Prime Minister. When someone wins, someone has to loose. But we should be proud as a country that no matter how hard some politicians tried to promise frivolous freebies & repeated loan waivers and khatakhat and takatak & whatnot, the majority of our countrymen did not fall for them and kept development as the only agenda to vote!
Everyone has a democratic right to cast his/her vote to any candidate of his/her choice so there should be no ill towards anyone!
Bottom line is, we should introspect as to why our countrymen will continue to be ruled by an ideology that was never ours! RESERVATIONS & BABUSHAHI!
Shining India cannot be a possible future till we shine from within!
Here are few beautiful lines for all of you to read…
“…..पलभर भी पड़ असमंजस में पथ भूल न जाना पथिक कहीं! “
: शिवमंगल सिंह सुमन
Jai Hind! 🇮🇳
Link to the poem:
https://www.hindwi.org/kavita/patriotism/path-bhool-na-jana-pathik-kahin-shivmangal-singh-suman-kavita?sort=

To know a brand, you need to see the team that works to bring it all together. Our greatest strength lies in our workforce of dedicated and passionate employees, who are 700 strong today.

Keerthi Nirmal had its inception on 30 August 1998 under the leadership of founder Mr. Johnson Varghese. From a humble beginning, Keerthi Nirmal has flourished to be one of Kerala’s top rice brands, with the best rice, becoming a familiar name in every household.

The company owned four mills keeping our daily production rate well above 700 tonnes. Our annual turnover in Kerala surpasses 900 crores. Keerthi Nirmal and Chandrika are renowned rice brands produced by Keerthi Agro Mills.

We offer a range of 15 varieties of rice. Matta rice, kuruva rice, kuruva red rice, jaya rice, palakkadan matta, kuthari rice, surekha rice, red matta rice, matta rice, white matta rice, broken rice, vadi matta rice, black rice, black red rice these are some of the varieties of rice from Nirmal. Apart from that we manufacture jaggery, avial and salt products.

Our Kerala matta and Kerala brown rice is famous for its quality. It is the best brown rice in existence. Our distribution network spans more than 30,000 retail and wholesale shops throughout Kerala in metropolitan areas. We have more than 180 vehicles operating to maintain a seamless supply network.

Other than that we offer online shopping for black rice and kuthari rice. Our promise of competitive pricing is delivered through this efficient distribution system, thereby reducing commission expense.

Keerthi Nirmal has always given paramount importance to the quality of our products. This approach has ensured sustained demand for our products. Being a producer of rice, which forms the staple diet of a good majority of people in South India, our efforts are directed towards ensuring the quality and hygienic packaging of our products. We also optimise our varieties to suit the demand and introduce rice varieties like long rice, Basmati rice etc., to satisfy the different taste palettes. We strive to improve and nurture the quality of life of our customers through our products.
Producing good quality rice depends on a lot of intrinsic and extrinsic factors. At Keerthi Nirmal, we use specific criteria to restrict the quality and grades of rice. The factors that count into making good rice are the variety, the environment it grows in, the seed quality, the size and uniformity of grain, stickiness, flavor, aroma, etc.
To produce the best in-class rice and allied products, we are equipped with the most modern and technologically advanced machines. The machines ensure that the production line is continually moving smoothly. The paddy is processed with very little or no bruising to the kernel, and the products remain fresh and healthy in the course of their refinement. Quality checks, sample testing at each point, and diligent operators ensure that the best quality products emerge at the end of the line.

Let me begin by saying that Kanye is an antisemitic P.O.S. and he needs therapy and medication. I am not a fan of his, and I am not a fan of Kim Kardashian.
That being said, the "feud" is not what it seemed.

• Kanye Lied

The controversy began when Taylor accepted her AOTY award by saying:

I want to say to all the young women out there: There are going to be people along the way who will try to undercut your success or take credit for your accomplishments or your fame.

So it seems she had an issue with Kanye saying he made her famous. That's the logical assumption here.
Tree Paine put out the statement: "Kanye did not call to ask for approval, but to ask Taylor to release his single "Famous"*** She declined and cautioned him about releasing a song with such a strong misogynistic message."
***He didn't call the song Famous at the time.
https://www.businessinsider.com/kim-kardashian-taylor-swift-kanye-west-call-tree-paine-2020-3

West's wife also added that "Famous" hadn't "been fully written" at the time of his call with Swift, but she continued on to say that "she manipulated the truth of their actual conversation in her

Kim drops a video of Kanye talking to Taylor. Kanye runs two lines by Taylor.
https://youtu.be/-5FUBwcpjrY?t=114 (Stop watching at 7:00)
Notice how Swift laughs at 4:09 when Kanye calls his wife a bitch. She doesn't seem offended.
6:52 -- "The feminists are gonna come out"
https://youtu.be/-5FUBwcpjrY?t=655 (stop watching at 12:20)
11:56 -- Kanye calls the song "Hood Famous", he doesn't tell Taylor it's called Famous. This proves Kim was right in saying that the song hadn't been fully written.
She does caution him as Tree said and Kanye did ask her to promote the song, but she doesn't outright "decline". Though if she did, does that matter? Rappers are allowed to say what they want -- it is a courtesy call.
https://youtu.be/-5FUBwcpjrY?t=1333
There is no reason to think Kanye withheld the word bitch. He likely didn't think to put it in at the time. Since Swift doesn't have a problem with Kanye using the word bitch to refer to a woman (his wife), it shouldn't bother her.
Tree, in response, claims that her full statement wasn't published (interesting). She claims the issue was that Kanye didn't run the "bitch" part.
https://x.com/treepaine/status/1242317695401541632
So the issue is now that Kanye called her a bitch? But didn't she say "there are going to be people along the way who will try to undercut your success or take credit for your accomplishments or your fame." Yet he ran the line at her and she was okay with him saying he made her famous.
The goalpost was moved.

• "The Music Video was Revenge p0rn."

The music video was inspired by a painting called Sleep. There are 12 naked bodies in a bed. Somehow, the narrative became that the music video was "revenge p0rn" against Taylor, though she wasn't the focus. Had she been the only body in that bed with Kanye and Kim, then I would agree.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Famous_(Kanye_West_song)#Music_video#Music_video)
Kanye said the video was a commentary on fame. I personally don't think the video was all that great as a piece of art, but to call a naked mannequin in a bed "revenge p0rn" is disingenuous.

• "Nobody saw me for a year."

I can't link to other subreddits, but there is a post titled Clarifying "nobody physically saw me for a year" timeline that shows she had a fairly normal 2016.
Outside of tabloids and twitter posts, did Swift really have a terrible 2016? It seems like she lived normally until February 2017. It seems like the implication is that Swift got the idea for Reputation at that time and went into isolation by choice.
The public cheered her whenever she performed live. It was nothing like Britney Spears in 2007.
Here's the kicker: When Reputation dropped, it did numbers. She didn't lose sales, popularity...she lost nothing.

Ken Ehrlich: “She had an advance of ["Famous”], so she commented on it in a very funny way."

Ken later retracted, saying he was wrong (interesting).
So Taylor used a nothing incident, turned it into drama, pretended the world hated her, and used all of that to create her worst album.

Poetic Form: Haiku

Definition: Haiku is a traditional Japanese poem consisting of three lines. The first and third lines have five syllables, and the second line has seven syllables, usually focusing on nature or a fleeting moment.
Example: An old silent pond (5) A frog jumps into the pond— (7) Splash! Silence again. (5)
Freewrite Prompt: The cherry blossoms danced on the breeze, painting a picture so serene that even the most hurried passerby couldn't help but pause and pen a haiku in their mind.

For those who enjoy pasttimes, a literary one!
I asked Chat-GPT to make a summary of the pre-Renaissance Classic. With her work in mind, think of the matching song.
obs.: no religious approach to be taken, more of the "hero's journey" structure :)
Inferno (Hell)

1. The Dark Wood: beginning lost in a dark forest
2. Meeting Virgil: a guide through Hell and Purgatory.
3. Gates of Hell: passing through the gates of Hell, inscribed with the famous line, "Abandon all hope, ye who enter here."
4. Circles of Hell: Hell is divided into nine circles, each punishing different sins:
   • First Circle (Limbo): Virtuous pagans and unbaptized infants.
   • Second Circle: Lust
   • Third Circle: Gluttony
   • Fourth Circle: Greed
   • Fifth Circle: Wrath
   • Sixth Circle: The heretics.
   • Seventh Circle: The violent (against others, self, God, nature, and art).
   • Eighth Circle (Malebolge): The fraudulent
   • Ninth Circle: The traitors, frozen in a lake of ice.
5. Encounter with the Devil: frozen in ice, as the ultimate symbol of betrayal

Purgatorio (Purgatory)

1. Ante-Purgatory: Souls who repented late and must wait before entering Purgatory proper.
2. Seven Terraces of Purgatory: Each terrace purifies a different sin, corresponding to the seven deadly sins.
3. Earthly Paradise: At the summit of Mount Purgatory, Dante meets Beatrice, his ideal woman, who guides him from here.

Paradiso (Paradise)

1. Nine Spheres of Heaven: Each sphere represents a different virtue and is inhabited by souls embodying that virtue:
   • 1st (Moon): Faith.
   • 2nd (Mercury): Hope.
   • 3rd (Venus): Love.
   • 4th (Sun): Prudence.
   • 5th (Mars): Fortitude.
   • 6th (Jupiter): Justice.
   • 7th (Saturn): Temperance.
   • 8th (Fixed Stars): Faith, hope, and love.
   • 9th (Primum Mobile): Angels and the concept of divine order.
2. Empyrean: a direct encounter with God.
3. Final Vision: Dante gains a profound understanding of divine love and the nature of the universe before returning to Earth.

I watch as they bound ahead Moving at full speed Whispering, laughing, holding hands They never needed me
Their shadows fade I waste away, alone again… I see
Fever dreams flash, I begin to crash Forgotten memories still haunt me I fade into black There’s no turning back At least here you can’t taunt me
~
I wander through the bone chilling dark Swimming, Drowning Falling apart
My misery DOESN’T like company There’s only room for me
Ive been chained up for so long Please just me free Will I ever find me?
~
I wish you could be here with me But that would be a crime You broke my spirit, stole my heart Wasted all my time
Now you can run and hide my love Your life will still be mine Wipe those tears baby boy You really crossed a line
Told me that I’m the worst The devil loves that lie
They told me to stand on business So I killed you in my mind
(Please share your thoughts on my amateur poem! Thank you in advance)

I waited a long time to read TBOSAS. I love the main trilogy, but it does have some flaws, and I was worried those flaws would be compounded in the prequel and it would make the whole series less likable to me. I am glad to say that is not what happened, and I genuinely enjoyed the prequel both as an addition to the series and on its own merits.
Right off the bat, I enjoyed the writing itself more in TBOSAS. Either Collins improved as a writer, or the slightly childish prose of the trilogy was a voice she created for Katniss and she chose a more eloquent style for the educated Snow. I’m not sure. Either way, I found TBOSAS more immersive because the flow of the words really matters to me as a reader. I was also super impressed by the quality of the lyrics in the novel–that’s a whole different skill, and Collins nailed it. Many authors would not have even tried writing lyrics, they’d have avoided it by describing Snow’s impressions of the songs, maybe shared one key line at most.
Story and tone-wise, TBOSAS is different enough from the trilogy to not feel redundant, though naturally it rehashes a lot of the same thematic elements. I feel like Collins has a fondness for subverting traditional love stories, because what transpires between Snow and Lucy Gray is certainly not a proper romance, even early in the story. Some readers seem jarred by his sudden aggression towards her in the third act, but it is well set up and justified by moments throughout the narration. And frankly, his abrupt homicidal turn would be harder to swallow if men didn’t snap and kill their families/partners with minimal warning in real life, but that absolutely happens.
On the other hand, I feel like Snow ended up swallowing Gaul’s kool aid a bit too easily in the end for someone as intelligent and, above all, practical as him. It’s a big jump from “everything about war is a waste and I don’t get why we do these games” to “we need this level of brutality to maintain civilization”. I understand how he got to that place–Dr. Gaul was his lifeline, and he’d participate in anything to stay in her good graces, and he was conflating his own feelings of vulnerability when outside of Capitol society with everyone’s needs/viewpoints, but I think it would have worked better if Collins had hammered on his contempt for people from the Districts a bit harder, rather than showing him relatively indifferent to them.
Still though, as an origin story for not just Snow, but the Capitol traditions, it works. Collins as usual surprised me with the degree of insight she had into the society she was describing–showing how the name of the Hunger Games played as deeply into the Capitol psyche as the Districts’ due to their mutual wartime deprivation was a clever angle, and well illustrated in Coriolanus’ relentless fixation on food.
I was worried Lucy Gray would come off as some sort of weird Katniss knock off, but she was entirely her own, compelling character. Also, the more literary part of me appreciates the parallel between her name poem and her fate in the story, although plot-wise it’s pretty superfluous.
In short, TBOSAS was far better than my previous experience with add-ons to established series led me to fear. I do hope Collins leaves it here, though, because frankly I feel like I’ve spent all the time in Panem that I’d ever care to.

Sorry for all of the scripts I am dropping in such a short amount of time and flooding the sub; I’m having fun with it haha. A script concept that my fave vtuber (and best friend) CelineWhitetail requested!
Okay to monetize, okay to paywall (share with me), okay to gender swap, okay to edit if it is to make changes related to swapping of genders but nothing else (there is a line in there about dudes not being allowed in the women’s dressing room so, that might be a challenge to adapt).
If you like this and want to record it, please credit me as GulltheCactus on Reddit, Twitter, or Twitch!
Scriptbin link: https://scriptbin.works/s/84c4w
A longer NSFW version will be posted on the sister spicy sub and on my Scriptbin!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[mall ambience, sneakers on tile]
Okay, I still can’t believe you’ve never had a date at the mall. It’s like…a rite of passage in high school.
Yeah, I mean, you would go to the mall with your friends on a Friday night and all of the boys would go too and you would awkwardly flirt by teasing and playing hard to get in the food court until one couple got brave and dared to break away from the group and hold hands. Then the rest of the group would make fun of them while the guy would buy his new girlfriend stupid things from Hot Topic! Malls are perfect for dates!
I mean why not? There’s everything here. You can get a soft pretzel, boba tea, new shoes, and dodge around preteens at every turn, all without going back outside the comfort of slightly stale central air conditioning.
Haha, okay okay. It’s a little dorky. But it’ll be fun. Come on, hold my hand and buy me things I don’t need from Hot Topic, babe.
Really? I mean, that’s fair. I think I’ve been in Hot Topic like…once. And that was somewhere around…2007. Do you think they still sell anime t-shirts and like…those edgy little decorations that were shaped like boobs or dicks?
I swear to god, I am not making that up. It was scandalous to go into Hot Topic because you’d probably see a cartoon penis.
Ohhh, you’re right! That was Spencer’s! Yeah I guess they were both a little too edgy for highschool me. [lowers voice] I was a good girl then.
I don’t know, have you done anything to deserve me being good, huh? Hah, yeahhhhh, you are pretty alright, I guess.
[giggling and more mall chatter ambience]
Ooh, yeah, it smells amazing. I think it’s the Great Cookie upstairs? Or…does the Great Cookie exist anymore? It occurs to me now that I’m walking through this mall that I don’t think I’ve been here in literally 15 years so my mall intel might be severely out of date.
Well, where did you want to go? Start at this end and just go through the whole first floor?
…Well what did you have in mind?
Okay, I accept. But just know that I am gonna kick your ass. I can think of like five different stores that are already competing for the title of “freakiest merchandise,” so finding the weirdest purchase in this mall will be child’s play, babe.
Okay, okay. I still think I’m going to kick your ass, but it’s a deal. You pick the store I have to buy something from, and I pick your store. Winner gets…hmm, let’s let the winner decide for the extra stakes. Shake on it?
[a quick kissing noise from boyfriend]
Hah, you and your kisses won’t distract me. You’re looking at a woman who has never backed down from a challenge in her life. So do you want to go straight to our respective challenge stores or just make it a surprise?
Sounds good to me. We’ll delay your inevitable demise.
[walking along, mall ambience]
Awww, I loved this store when I was in high school and college!
Yeah, it’s like a slightly more expensive boutique, you know, jewelry, bags, scarves, etcetera. It looks like they have a few more dresses and things than they used to.
Nah, I don’t think it’s really my style anymore, I was preppier back then. But it’s a nice nostalgia moment.
What about you? I think they have a Games Workshop and there’s another little local DND and comics store just a few stores down.
Yeah, I think it’d be cool to check out! Do you have any physical dice? I know you pretty much always play online so…
Aww, that’s so cute! Do your siblings still have their sets too?
I love that. We mostly played board games, and usually only when we went over to my one cousin’s house.
No, I’ve never played it but everyone talks about how fun Catan is. We played like 90’s and oughts popular games. You know, Monopoly, Scattergories, Pictionary. Ooh, I loved Cranium, I destroyed at that game.
No, I don’t know what you mean. I am a perfectly well-adjusted and not at all overly competitive individual, thank you.
But yeah, I also wanted to try…the Hill House one?
Yes! Betrayal at the House on the Hill! That one! Everyone in my Friday DND group tells me it’s so fun and I’ve never had anyone in person to play it with.
Really? Yesssss! Okay come on it’s right here.
[distant greeting from an employee]
Hi! I’m great, how are you? We’re just looking right now, thanks!
Okay so the board games are over there—Ooh, look at those dice! Are those glass? They’re so pretty! And look, babe, they match this set. Oh and wait, look at these dice trays!
[sound of footsteps moving away]
[slightly more distant, talking to an employee] Yeah! I play on Roll20 and Foundry online, I’ve never had any physical dice…
[sound of your own footsteps, picking up a board game or two and pieces shift in the boxes]
[getting closer as she speaks] Hey babe, so those dice trays are made by a local guy—I got a business card for his Etsy too—and they’re two for $45–
[pause]
Haha, wait how did you have time to grab all of this stuff—Oh my god is that a Yuumi plushie?! She’s so cute, oh my god!
Aww, babe. You really were gonna hold my hand and buy me things. Okay, wait, new plan for this store. I saw things I wanted to get you, too, so let’s split up and then meet at the front of the store after we pay?
[peck on the cheek sound]
Okay, see you soon!
[more footsteps and shopping sounds, eventual beeping of the card reader as you pay]
[the crinkle of a plastic bags]
Hah, I’m smiling because I’m excited to show you what I got you! Come on, there’s a free bench over there.
Okay, so, I remember how much you said you liked this anime as a kid, and they had a section for model building so…Ta da!
Yeah! I remembered you loved the one that could change its armor and then as soon as I saw the blue version and the orange one I was like, yep, Liger Zero Schneider, that’s the one.
It was on sale!
…Like 15% off? Come on, you love it though, right?
See!
Yeah, and I love that. I’m so excited to play Betrayal at the House on the Hill and Catan. And that Yuumi plushie is going right on my desk.
Yeah? …Okay! But let me show you what I got us both first!
Here, this one’s for you, and this one’s mine! Aren’t they awesome? The guy does his own woodworking and staining and then his wife designs the fabric for the trays!
Haha yeah! See look, I got the one with the lilacs and daffodils and roses, and you’re the suns with the fun sunglasses!
Of course you’re the sunshine! You’re my sunshine.
Nope, you are.
We’re not arguing about this in public, we’re too disgusting, I refuse. This one is yours. And I got you these dice!
Look they have little quotes from famous literature all pasted on the inside.
Yeah, of course you do, it’s cause you’re such a nerd, babe.
[peck on the cheek]
You’re right, I do love it.
[dice clacking together]
Wait, aww! They’re so cute! The orange ones look like Amber, oh my god! I didn’t even see these cat dice!
Hah, sneaky sneaky. But yeah, that makes sense, I did see you go talk to the guy at the dice counter like instantly.
And then—
…What? It’s just one more thing, I promise! And it’s small!
See, look! It spins! And you can keep it on your keys, so anytime you need to make a choice and can’t decide, you can spin it and the d20 can decide for you.
Hah, yes, I do love you anyway, but the times when neither of us can come to a decision point make me want to cry sometimes.
Haha, love you!
…Okay? Why?
Wait, I didn’t know we were doing the bet yet. I thought I was supposed to pick your store.
Okay, okay. I’ll close my eyes, fine!
I’m scared, why is this box so heavy?
[horrified pause]…Oh my god—
Stop laughing! Oh my god, you did not—!
Why am I trying to hide it? [lowered voice] Maybe because I don’t want everyone in the entire mall to know I’m an anime degenerate, okay?
No, you did not win!
Yes, I am horrified because you probably just spent $400 on a statue of Sebastian from Black Butler, and no, the ridiculousness of the situation is not lost on me.
I mean, no, I don’t think I could buy you something worse than this.
…I don’t think it’s any of your business where exactly I am going to display this stupidly detailed figure of my anime husband in my room, okay? That’s private.
No you didn’t win.
No—
[a sigh] Okay, fine. I cannot think of something that would horrify you more than this purchase horrifies me.
No, I’m not going to say it.
Because you cheated. You used deeply held, embarrassing anime knowledge against me. Humph!
[peck on the cheek sound] I said it before and I’ll say it again, you will not distract me with your kisses.
Oh? And just what is my punishment for losing exactly?
[annoyed sound] You will use any excuse to allow yourself to buy me fancy clothes and things I don’t need, won’t you?
You’re ridiculous. [peck on the lips] Thank you, you don’t have to.
Hah! Okay, fair. So where exactly are you taking me to buy said clothes you want to [lowers voice flirtatiously] take back off of me?
Oh geez, babe. Nordstrom’s is so overpriced!
No, you didn’t win, you cheated! I am holding hands and following you under protest! I am gonna file an appeal with the Silly Couple Amateur Bets Commission.
Wait, hold on. Please don’t spend too much?
No.
No!
$200.
No way! $250.
I am being reasonable, you’re the one saying you want to buy me $5000 worth of clothes for no reason!
Yeah, a date to the mall. We’re supposed to go split a lemonade and a soft pretzel from Auntie Anne’s, not spend a down payment on a car.
[sigh] $1000.
[mock threatening] Fine. And if you spend a cent more—
[hushed, slightly embarrassed tone at saying this in public but still trying to be threatening] I won’t go down on you for a month!
[indignant] Yes I could!
[deadpan] I hate you.
Thank you. $1000 is already an insane amount to be spending.
Oh?
Okay, okay. I can get behind that. But I do get to veto clothes I really don’t think I will look good in.
Yeah, okay. Laying it on a little thick aren’t you, buddy?
Yeah, well, you’re handsome.
Okay, so the women’s clothes are on the next floor up I think.
[escalator noises]
Yeah, I got my prom dress at a Nordstrom’s, I went with a couple of my friends.
This might shock you, knowing what you know about me, but it was…green.
I know! I’m predictable. What can I say? Nature-loving bitch right here.
[stifled laughter] And I’m sure you looked stupidly handsome even in your pale blue suit.
Okay, so, where do we start…?
Hah, fine. But remember your limit.
Ooh, this is cute! And the blue lace would match that one tie I got you last year.
Yeah, it brings out the hazel flecks in your eyes.
Okay, wow. Yeah that is—Babe, that dress is $400!
Fine, fine, but I’m tallying! I’ve got my phone out, calculator right here!
But fine, what else did you want me to try on?
…To be honest, I’m sort of surprised you didn’t start at the lingerie and bathing suit section.
Ooh, look at that one! Do you think I’ll look dumb with all the straps? I’m just hoping it’ll make my boobs look good.
Yeah, of course you would say that, you’re down bad.
Haha, of course. [whisper] I’m down bad for you too.
[clicking of hangers against each other on the racks]
Hmm. What do you think about—
…Babe. That bikini is practically microscopic. I don’t think I can even try that on in the store.
Okay, okay, I’ll give it a shot.
Anything else you want to throw on the clothing pile?
You do realize that every new thing you add is probably another 5 minutes in the dressing room right?
Alright, alright. They have a five item limit so I guess you’re waiting your butt out here with the rest of it.
Yes, it is a cute butt. I’ll be back soon.
Yessss, I know. I will show you everything that fits.
[quiet department store chatter]
[squeak of a dressing room door and a hushed stage whisper] Babe, I cannot walk out there and show you this bathing suit.
[still a stage whisper] Because it’s tiny! Basically all you can see is my underwear.
Then come in here!
[the sound of the dressing room door creaking again] Tada?
Hah, okay, calm down. Sure, my boobs look great but—
[shutting and locking the door as footsteps approach]
[whisper] Shh!
Because you’re not allowed to be in the women’s dressing room.
[the sound of clicking hangers on a rack, footsteps coming closer, more clinking…and the footsteps walk away]
[quiet bursts of laughter for a long time] Okay, okay. That was close.
Oh?
Hah, yeah, considering I’m not letting you leave until I’ve finished changing and can be your lookout, I guess you really did win the bet. [flirty whisper] Enjoy your front row seat, babe.
[kissing sounds as the mall ambience outside fades out]

He has autism and bipolar disorder. He’s 20 years old.
He’s a famous singer who everyone thinks is a lunatic. He giggles when he says “I’m a lunatic.”
He posts naked photos (only covers his dick and butt crack) of himself on instagram. He does weird things on instagram. He also says stupid things on social media.
He wants to wear a blood stained plastic outfit to the Grammy awards. He also has other dumb outfit ideas for award ceremonies.
He says he wants to have 6 kids in his twenties, and doesn’t want any kids after his twenties are over. He wants to be a single dad and have kids through surrogacy via egg donation because he’s afraid someone will use his kids against him. He doesn’t want to pay child support. He wants to pay for an assistant to help him, but your partner (also his parent too) wants to help him even though they get exhausted with helping.
He’s always holding or guarding his newborn baby. He doesn’t allow anyone else but a trusted medical professional to hold his baby that’s under six months. He also plans on putting video cameras everywhere when someone babysits the kids over six months. Your partner tells him that he’s being ridiculous.
When asked if he’s gay because he’s opting for surrogacy, he says he’s straight. He says “hell no” to ugly guys. He says “no thanks” to attractive guys because he says “there’s nothing wrong with him, I’m just not attracted to him.” He told one of his gay backup dancers, “Even if I was gay, I wouldn’t be attracted to you.”
He screamed and cursed you out when he was on lithium. He yells and cries when he curses at you or anyone else in the family. He stops taking lithium, and prefers other drugs.
He said “I don’t look like my parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, or any of my siblings. I look adopted. I’m the mutant of the family.”
He almost walked into a train and his sibling pulled him away before he crossed the line. He did that because he wanted to see who cares about him and would pull him away. His sibling tells him it’s almost as if he needs to be put on a leash.
His assistants are paid to listen to him or they would steal from him. His assistants and bodyguards keep quitting at some point because he’s hard to deal with.
It looks like he needs 24/7 supervision. His siblings are willing to look out for him no matter how much he gives them a hard time. He loves everyone in his family. He has a really big heart but he’s embarrassing, messy and an emotional trainwreck.
Would you disown him? Would you still keep contact with him? How would you interact with him?

Hello Duoduo, the previous letter was official business, and this one, is just for a casual chat. It snowed today in Kyoto for the first time in the fifth year of the Qing calendar. Came earlier than usual. The snow in Shangjing must be even heavier, and weather colder. I remember branches of plum blossoms at the corner of the fence in your vegetable garden. I wonder if those branches have blossomed with red specks to add some colour to the dull white snow.
Oh, how are the ducks you raised? Be careful not to let them freeze to death... It's quite normal here. Little Yellow, Little Black, and Little White are all raised in a farm outside the Capital. I heard that the guys there treat those three fat cats as if they are their ancestors. Definitely won't have problems raising them.
I've been fine, just eating and sleeping. The house has been quiet. My sister is busy in the Imperial Medical Office these days. I heard that it has become a rare sight in Kyoto. Wan'er returned to Lin Mansion today. My adorable brother-in-law probably feels neglected recently, and is a bit angry. I wonder what you are doing at this time.
By the way, my student, Shi, opened a brothel. Business is good. The food dishes are especially exquisite. If you travel to Qing one day, I want to bring you there. Ah, it suddenly occurred to me I have forgotten the name of the restaurant in Shangjing last time, but I still remember that the wine was good, and I talked a lot of nonsense with you. I wonder how much you remember.
By the way, I have read your first few letters several times, but I always feel sour. You are a saint, don't imitate the behavior of those rich families' ladies and try including poems in your letters. Although I somewhat have reputation as a praised poet, I have no interest in correcting compositions.”
Last time, you said that Si Lili is doing well... Well, don't talk about this kind of thing anymore. I have always had a grudge about this matter, and for some reason, I especially feel troubled hearing about her from you.
Duoduo, come to Qing to visit. My wife is also very curious about you... Also, by the way, can your Tian Yi Dao skills be passed on to outsiders? I have suddenly become more interested in your training methods recently.
The snow seems to be getting heavier. The young man outside the house is still chopping firewood. Young people are always passionate. Though I am still young, for some reason, I feel a little old in my heart. Looking at the people around me, it's hard to get interested. I feel tired, and bored of everything... The wind and snow outside are howling, maybe it's urging me to write. So okay, let's stop here. The fireplace here is too old, and it's hard to warm up the room. Although I still want to talk to you, I feel that there is no need to go against God's cruelty... In addition, please help me take care of him, thank you, and wish you all the best.
Wang Qinian, if you dare to peek again, I will let Mu Tie and his nephew peek at your daughter when she takes a bath!
A whole letter of useless chat, except one line: "Can your Tian Yi Dao skills be passed on to outsiders?"
Judging from this letter alone, it seems that Fan Xian is a sly and despicable conman, purposely leading her on, just so she would give him her secret training techniques... 🤔

Links to previous Episodes below the story.
Episode 7 marks the beginning of the final trilogy of stories in the book.
If you'd like to listen to me read this story click here.
All Strays episodes on YouTube
(Along with my questionable photoshop skills)
Episode 7 - "Farmer Bren"
“Isn’t it amazing?”
Commander Bren was trying to simply enjoy the view but he struggled to relax, as his brain calculated the volume of water, the speed it reached as it spilled over the edge, and what the rocks must look like under the falls, after centuries of erosion. After Commander Klein’s question Bren managed to shut down the critical thinking for a moment. As he watched the water flow over the falls his imagination led his mind to a space he wasn’t familiar with. He was thinking of the water, and of space. Bits of wood occasionally flowing with the water, like a spaceship in space.
Commander Klein watched as Bren seemed to shut down his mind and just enjoy the view. Klein relaxed as Bren relaxed. Finally. Klein had been about to give up. He had taken Bren to several natural wonders across the eastern parts of North America, and Bren had calculated the years a tree took to grow “that way,” what type of fauna would live in the forest along a rugged mountain river, caves, canyons, gardens, just problems to be solved. Finally, Bren was enjoying something. Niagara Falls. In the past it had been a tourist trap. Fascinating, but surrounded by tacky gift shops and hot dog stands. Now the natural surroundings made it an uncluttered connection to nature. For long minutes Bren didn’t move, just letting his eyes scan the area, following the flow of water in so many different places, all heading to the same spot eventually.
Klein allowed himself to be hypnotized by the falling water. Finally, Bren broke the silence. “This water, flowing, yet, as you go smaller it becomes droplets, then molecules, Hydrogen and Oxygen bonded together. Atoms to molecules to drops to gallons to a river to an ocean.”
Klein smiled. Even Bren’s relaxed state was science based, and technically, Bren wasn’t even a scientist. He was a diplomat. A fact driven home over the past week as Bren spent hours discussing protocols and agreements with Earth’s leaders. Although Klein and Captain Gardner spent time in those meetings, Bren was there for all of them. 12-16 hours every day, as Bren kicked into full diplomatic mode. It was impressive to watch, although incredibly boring. But Bren was as energetic as Klein had seen him. He seemed truly excited to discuss viral threats and currency exchanges while Klein sat waiting to see if they would need him for the next four hour block. He was relieved when it was over, and they got a few days off on Earth. His thoughts were interrupted by Bren, continuing.
“It occurs to me Commander, your method of FTL is like a tree branch going over the falls.” Klein smiled at the analogy. Bren continued, “But most FTL is more akin to the canal upstream. A shortcut across the field that is a far smoother way to negotiate that distance.”
Klein realized Bren was hinting at different methods of FTL in real life. He looked carefully at the canal on his pad, looking at the satellite overview. The canal he spoke of connected two branches of the river, allowing access across a great distance that would not be possible without the canal. “Like a wormhole?”
Bren smiled. “That is a fair analogy, but I was thinking more of the method of propulsion. Engines aren’t allowed in the river, so generated wave movement in the canal pushes the water in either direction, negating the need for motorized transport.”
Klein tapped the screen, looking for more information on the canal. He made a note, and sent the article to his personal message center. He’d have to read it later. “Why don’t you just tell me?”
Bren smiled, “Protocol.”
Klein nodded. Bren had made his dislike of Snap FTL apparent early on. Clearly other species in the universe didn’t use Snap. But Bren couldn’t share the details. So he dropped hints for Klein. A puzzle Klein hadn’t put together yet. Bren turned to Klein.
“This has been a refreshing break. Quite enjoyable. Shall we travel to meet Lieutenant Jeffries?”
Klein examined Bren. He actually did look refreshed. He smiled. “Yes, let’s go. I can’t wait until we fly over the Rocky Mountains. Maybe that will impress you.” Bren looked confused.
“I have been quite impressed Commander. The diamond mine was very informative. Especially how your people took the hardest mineral on your planet and exploited it for expensive trinkets and jewelry, instead of practical uses.”
Klein was unsure what Bren regarded as relaxation as they approached the shuttle.
As expected, the trip over the Rocky Mountains caused Bren to discuss Earth’s tectonic movements, as well as a discussion on volcanoes and again, erosion. Some of the canyons along the Utah/Colorado border did get his attention, as Klein flew as low as was allowed. But, as Bren pointed out, his world also had mountains.
As they turned north, they followed the trail of cities and towns along the mountains in Utah. Klein explained to Bren that somehow, Utah had avoided any major damage during the war. Utah certainly had a history of nuclear testing in the past, but as a low population area, with mountains, there was nothing of value worth destroying. Other nearby states, flatter states, had missiles located around the area and as such, were overrun in places by groups attempting to commandeer them. Battles played out, with a few warheads detonating underground. Utah had nothing to steal, and mostly fighters just bypassed the state. This was the reason so many farms had survived. As they approached northern Utah Klein marveled. “It’s amazing that Bella’s family has been on that farm for almost two-hundred years.”
Bren noted, “That is not uncommon on Klaan, but we haven’t had a major military conflict in over three thousand years.”
As they dropped to landing range Jeffries lit a smoke flare on the ground for Klein. There wasn’t much wind, but it was a legal requirement in this area, as there was no official landing pad for 100 kilometers.
As Klein and Bren hopped off the shuttle Jeffries charged up to them, excited. She stopped and offered a salute, but Klein dismissed it as they hugged, and she turned to Bren. “I’ve never asked, is a hug an acceptable form of greeting for Klaan?”
Bren shrugged, “It is not forbidden.”
She snickered as she gave him a hug, then pulled them both toward the main farm. “You made it just in time to help me feed the sheep before dinner.” Klein rolled his eyes as Bren searched his memory files. She noticed his look and pointed to a field. “Sheep!”
Bren looked up. “Ah, I have the definition of the word, but have no images to refer to.” This seemed to be what finally caused Bren to relax, as he watched the furry sheep make noise and follow them as they headed to the feed area. He noticed Jeffries speaking to the sheep. “Do they — understand you?”
She chortled. “They don’t know what I’m saying, but they know that I’m about to feed them.” Klein nudged Jeffries as Bren stopped near a few sheep who took an interest in him.
He looked at them curiously. “Hello sheep, lambs, rams, ewes. I’m Bren, and we are here to feed you.” The sheep bleated as they jostled to get closer and Bren seemed delighted. Jeffries came up and pulled a handful of alfalfa from a nearby bale, handing it to Bren and pointing for him to hold it out. As expected, the sheep forced their way to the green treats and nibbled away. Bren was overjoyed. He turned around looking for more. Jeffries pulled another bunch and gave it to Bren, who turned and hand fed the sheep again. He bounced like a child and Jeffries grabbed his arm.
“If you like that you’ll love this.” She entered a feeding area, troughs and platforms lined one side, and she directed Bren toward the feed line. “Do you want to release the levers and load the bins, or distribute the alfalfa?”
Bren looked, “Both!”
She pulled him forward. “At each station pull the lever, it will release the feed pellets into the bins.” Bren pulled one, and it did just as she described, and a few sheep pushed in, while others waited at stations down the line. “Now do the same to the others!” Bren excitedly went down the line releasing levers as the sheep began eating. He got to the end and looked back proudly. Jeffries pointed at a bale of alfalfa on a hanging trolley. “Take a couple layers off the end and put in the area next to the bins.”
Bren pulled at the bailed brick of alfalfa and pulled a few layers off, then put them carefully in the area she had indicated. Jeffries laughed. “This isn’t fine dining, you can just toss it in.”
Bren smiled as he pulled the trolley down the line, continuing to carefully place the greens in each area. When he reached the end where Klein sat on a bale of alfalfa and Jeffries was grinning, Bren spoke. “I haven’t ever seen animals such as these up close. On Klaan we do not keep farm animals. We have designated reserves, but we’re not allowed to interact. These animals are deserving of respect, and I treated them as such.” He smiled. “We will do more with them?”
Jeffries looked at him, seeing a side of him he hadn’t shown in the three months he’d been on the ship. He was always happy when they found a sleeper ship, but he seemed truly moved by his experience feeding sheep. “Yes Commander, we will put them inside tonight, and feed them tomorrow before breakfast.”
Bren smiled. “Excellent!” Jeffries took them both by the arm and guided them to the house, where the scent of home cooking was already sneaking out onto the farm.
Bren had never experienced a feast such as was served by Jeffries’ mother. Bren had awkwardly asked if any animal meat was present, and she assured him it was not. After dinner she explained as Bren asked for more details on the food. “We have excellent meat substitutes, but mostly this is just vegetables, grown right here in the ground.” She smiled, “It’s a wonder you all can survive out there, eating the — stuff — you eat.” She looked at her daughter. “Bella has lost too much weight!” Jeffries rolled her eyes. She stood to gather plates, as did Klein. Mrs. Jeffries scolded him to sit. “You are a guest, sit!” She asked for details on everything that had happened and Klein and Bren gladly answered her queries. She seemed very impressed, especially when they told the story of Jeffries clamping a shuttle on top of the Sellane fighter.
She laughed, “That is the only time you can land on top of another vehicle without getting in trouble. Lord knows she turned some tractors sideways here in the past.”
Jeffries looked at her carefully… “Mom, don’t…”
Mrs. Jeffries continued over her daughter’s protests. “Bella once tried to take a tractor into town to buy candy. She was twelve. Of course she drove tractors on the farm, but not on the roads.” Jeffries groaned as the story continued. “She was still dragging a partial trailer load of alfalfa. She trundled down the road into town, went into the store and bought her candy. What was it Belly?”
Jeffries sat down. “Gummy bears.”
Mrs. Jeffries continued, laughing along the way. “She realized that the way she had parked she was stuck. She had to back out onto the street. On a farm you don’t get traffic, but in town…” Jeffries sighed. “So little Bella just backed up. Right onto the car driven by the mayor. This caused the stacked hay to shift and the whole trailer slid to the side, dumping bales of hay onto the main street and the mayor’s car.”
Jeffries stood up. “OK, enough reminiscing, we’re going to put the sheep in for the night.”
Her mother tilted her head. “Just check the cameras and remote close the barn. No need to go out there.”
Jeffries smiled, “It seems like more fun to go.” She nodded at Bren, “You coming?” Bren jumped up, bowing to Mrs. Jeffries as he stumbled to follow. Jeffries smiled at her mother as she shrugged. “He likes the sheep.” She stopped a moment as she heard her mother speak to Klein.
“Let me show you some pictures James.” Jeffries gathered herself and proceeded to catch up to Bren.
Just before sunrise Jeffries woke and quickly got dressed to go out to the sheep. Her mother was in the kitchen, she pointed at the camera feed. “I already let the sheep out. I checked the timestamps, he’s been waiting out there for an hour.” Jeffries looked and sure enough, there was Bren, strolling up and down the fence line with handfuls of alfalfa, feeding whichever sheep chose to follow him. She went to the hall and pulled on boots, grabbing another pair as she left.
Bren was talking to the sheep as Jeffries approached. He saw her and exclaimed, “Good morning Lieutenant!” She waved.
“Go ahead Bren, just like last night.” Bren excitedly moved down the line, pulling levers and then distributing alfalfa. He reached the end and Jeffries plopped the extra boots down in front of him. “Put these on, you should be able to pull them on over your shoes.” He looked at her curiously. She smiled as she headed for a gate. He stood and she called him over. “Come on Old MacDonald.” They stepped into the area with the sheep as she grabbed a chunk of alfalfa.
They jostled into the middle of the sheep pen and a few sheep took notice, coming to see what was up. They nudged and bleated to get their attention and Jeffries thought Bren might overload. He seemed so happy. His behavior was unlike anything she had seen. As they fed and petted the sheep a message came across the communication system in the feeding area. It was Commander Klein.
“Can you hear me?” Jeffries looked at the camera and gave a thumbs up. He continued. “Hurry back when you’re done. Change of plans.” Jeffries nodded to Bren who stepped away, somewhat disappointed. She looked curiously as the sheep seemed to line up and nuzzle as he walked past them. She looked at him questioningly.
“Klaan are not telepathic, but we do have strong empathetic projection with some beings. Maybe they sensed my sadness at leaving.” Indeed as they left the sheep lingered, looking at them as they returned to the house.
When they reached the house Klein was gathering bags and packages. Bren had asked for some vegetables and Mrs. Jeffries was more than happy to oblige. Klein waved them inside. “Captain Gardner called. He’s already at the ship, and we have about an hour, instead of picking him up we’ll go straight on. But, no way we get out of here without breakfast.” He grinned as Bren noted the bags full of carrots, onions, potatoes, tomatoes, and other foods to take with them.
As they ate Klein explained. “We received an automated distress call, definitely an Earth ship, and an actual distress call. So we are going to investigate.” They had planned one more day on the farm and a day spent in the Seattle area with Gardner before returning to the ship. That would have to wait. Mrs. Jeffries piled up the food, pancakes, breads and fruits, as well as traditional breakfast items, (without meat for Bren) all asking to be consumed.
After gorging themselves they packed the shuttle and Mrs. Jeffries stood with them as they prepared to leave. Jeffries hugged her mother and they held the embrace. Mrs. Jeffries spoke. “I received a note from your Captain. He is quite impressed with you. I’m so proud, but I still miss you.” They both teared up a little before Jeffries moved inside.
As she prepared to fly back to the Shepard, her mother lit the requisite smoke flare. They lifted and Klein looked down. He was a bit unnerved. “What did you guys do with the sheep? I feel like they’re watching us?” Bren smiled wide as Jeffries laughed.
“Apparently Bren can communicate with sheep.” She laughed again as Klein looked at him curiously before they pulled away from the staring eyes of a few dozen sheep on the Jeffries’ farm.
Previous Stories in this series:
Strays Episode 1 - "Klaan"
Strays Episode 1 - Part 2 "New Denver"
Strays episode 0.1 - "Welcome Home Strays" (Sleeper ships orientation video)
Strays - Episode 2 - "Manifest"
Strays, Episode 3 - "The List"
Strays - Episode 4 - "Harvest"
Strays Episode 5 - "Shaa-a-ren"
Strays Episode 6 - "Gaia"

13 minutes of Armenia coverage by Transcaucasian Telegraph. Follow for regular updates.

US-AM-TR-AZ

• U.S. NatSec Jake Sullivan and Erdogan's Advisor Kilic (not that Kilic) discussed a range of topics including the "importance of a peace agreement between Armenia and Azerbaijan."
• During a meeting dedicated to Turkey-Azerbaijan energy cooperation, Turkish President Erdogan welcomed the progress in the AZ-AM peace process and said he expects a peace agreement ASAP.
• Joe Biden's letter to Baku Energy Week forum participants: A durable and dignified peace agreement that ends decades of conflict would transform the South Caucasus and fundamentally change Azerbaijan's role in the region. The United States stands ready to support this noble ambition. We owe it to future generations to ensure peace and prosperity remain our guiding principles.
• Armenia has made amendments to the draft peace agreement and sent the 9th revision to Baku as part of the back-and-forth process.
source, source, source, source,

new or notable information from FM Mirzoyan's hourslong parliament presentation about diplomacy in 2023 and 2024:

• Armenia wants Turkey to display tangible progress on the ground by unblocking the border.
• Relations deepened with the US, UK, and France.
• Cooperation with the EU has expanded to include new areas including defense.
• FM Mirzoyan accused an ARF MP of parroting "imported" Russian "imperial" narratives after the ARF MP spoke against the border delimitation process with Azerbaijan.
• An ARF MP said the presence of the EU border mission makes Armenia more vulnerable. FM Mirzoyan countered it by saying there have been no incursions since the deployment of the EU mission. Mirzoyan accused ARF and its allies of "setting up a trap" for Armenia by advancing a dangerous foreign policy for decades which forced Armenia to be dependent on Russia. "It was a sweet strategy to ensure Armenia's captivity."
• A ruling party MP accused ARF, Levon Ter-Petrosyan's ANC, and Azerbaijan of being the only parties today that are attempting to revive the topic of Khojalu. The ARF MP disagreed. FM Mirzoyan said he sees synchronous activities between the Azerbaijani government, opposition-run media outlets in Armenia, and certain circles in Russia.
• FM Mirzoyan asked ARF MP to explain his vision for returning to Nagorno-Karabakh. The ARF MP said Nagorno-Karabakh must have a certain level of autonomy. Mirzoyan said that's what the Pashinyan administration was attempting to accomplish last year and that ARF rejected it. Pashinyan at the time said there was a need to lower the status bar from full independence to a lower level of autonomy in order to rally international support. That idea was sharply rejected by ARF and its satellites in Nagorno-Karabakh who controlled the parliament. FM Mirzoyan accused Nagorno-Karabakh's ARF wing of adopting a resolution that further entrenched maximalism and "from sea to sea Artsakh" during the blockade, instead of lowering the bar to increase international support.
• Armenia was able to significantly deepen relations with Georgia (Strategic Agreement in February) and Iran (economic relations).
• Relations with Russia are more transparent than ever.
• After decades of efforts, last year Armenia was finally able to establish diplomatic relations with Saudi Arabia.
• Unprecedented: Armenia's Foreign Minister participated in the Arab League's ministerial meeting this year.
• Unprecedented: Armenia took part for the first time in Manama Dialogue.
• Armenia and UAE established a visa-free regime in February.
• Armenia won the elections in 5 out of 5 international organizations (UN, OSCE, UNESCO, Francophonie, etc.) where it submitted a candidacy.
• Still frozen with CSTO. No new developments.
• New diplomatic offices in Tabriz and Serbia, and an embassy in Cyprus. Diplomatic relations were established with Botswana and Trinidad and Tobago. Armenia has relations with 182 countries.
• Armenia and Hungary continue to restore relations; resident embassies will open. Belgium, Canada, and Qatar opened embassies in Yerevan. GIZ and KfW opened offices. Etc.
• Armenia sees a problem in Azerbaijan's constitution and Azerbaijan sees a problem in Armenia's constitution but the topic of constitutional changes is not part of the AM-AZ negotiation agenda and Armenia does not believe these constitutional issues can obstruct long-term peace.
• South Korea and Armenia have agreed to open embassies and other offices.
• Yerevan and New Delhi have agreed to hold direct flights. FM Mirzoyan sees great economic potential. He urged Armenian businesses to trade with India and not export exclusively to the "traditional markets".
• Armenia expects non-lethal technologies and mostly military medical-related assistance from the EU's Peace Facility.
• Two main channels of cooperation with EU: 1) The upgraded CEPA is currently being discussed, 2) April 5 Brussels programs for Armenia's resilience. These talks include the European Peace Facility, the visa-free regime, etc.
• Certain things could get delayed because of the June elections in the European Union, said a ruling party MP.
source,

Armenia's Deputy FM Hovhannisyan about Armenia-EU relations

• The EU remains the largest donor for Armenia.
• EU provided €12 million in aid to Nagorno-Karabakh refugees.
• Active discussions are underway to upgrade CEPA.
source,

France was one of the countries blocking the visa-free regime between Armenia and EU: ranking ruling party MP tasked with EU affairs

YEGHOYAN: Certain EU states do not want to deal with the potential problem of deporting more Armenians in the event visa liberalization leads to increased migration and illegal stays. We are negotiating to change that. Lately, a series of countries that had concerns have changed their stance and during recent official meetings, they have not opposed the launch of the liberalization discussions. There is only one group of states, 1-2 countries, that still oppose it.
REPORTER: Which country shows the strongest opposition?
YEGHOYAN: At this time... it's not the country in your mind anymore. There is a process...
REPORTER: We have information that it was France that strongly opposed it.
YEGHOYAN: Not anymore. France has withdrawn its objections. Yes, they initially objected to the liberalization because of the large Armenian community but we negotiated with them and implemented reforms in Armenia. There is another group of states, again with high living standards, who are currently on the fence. In any case, their opposition is not as strong as Hungary's veto to Armenia receiving military assistance from the European Peace Facility. These countries instead want Armenia to remedy more problems so they can show their own populations that having a visa-free regime with Armenia won't lead to their taxpayer funds being wasted on deporting Armenians. This is more of an internal political issue for them, and we understand that.

... here is why visa lines are so long to travel to EU for tourism or business

REPORTER: Why does it take forever to get a visa to a European country today?
YEGHOYAN: Many Russians are coming to Armenia to get a visa to Europe, so the lines got long. To this day the diplomatic offices have been unable to keep up with the demand; we are trying to find solutions. On top of that, some tourism agencies can use programs to reserve large numbers of visas and resell them to others at a higher price. I asked embassies to stop granting visas to individuals with other names, so whoever took the spot must be the one to use it. I think the German embassy has chosen that option; we are working with them right now.
REPORTER: Could the developments in Georgia have an impact on Armenia and EU?
YEGHOYAN: Yes. We hope Georgia finds a balanced solution.
REPORTER: And what about right-wingers gaining power in the EU during upcoming elections?
YEGHOYAN: The Right is improving its numbers but they do not have the numbers to form the government. I can't predict how much influence the Right will have on the new government and it's something that also depends on the performance of Right in their respective countries.
source,

Armenia's economy ministry is drafting a new export strategy; notable parts from Minister Papoyan's presentation in parliament

• The new Strategy is almost ready and will soon be presented to relevant committees.
• Every product with export potential has been examined by Armenian and foreign experts with the help of EU and USAID. The export potential and possible destination of each product were calculated.
• The experience of similar countries was studied. If Armenia currently produces A-B-C, the study reveals that certain countries similar to Armenia also produce D, so the advice is to expand the scope of production and exports, to include items not currently part of the chain.
• Armenia and Turkey are engaged in active trade via 3rd countries despite closed borders. The ministry doesn't expect a "shock" if it opens. What we need from them and what they need from us is more or less already being traded, at a higher price.
• The first truck arrived from China to Armenia through the Silk Road and Crossroads of Peace in 20 days. This is down from 35-40 days if the route is through Russia and other routes. The new route is much faster, said Papoyan.
• The Armenian government is taking steps to receive unobstructed access to seas with the help of WTO and EU. Armenia is a landlocked country so the access must be granted by WTO members Turkey and Georgia. Economy Minister Papoyan criticized the former governments for spending their diplomatic efforts on "other things" [genocide recognition] but not holding a dialogue with Turkey to grant Armenia access to the sea. Minister Papoyan implied that the ministry has employees who are going through a shock because of the rapid shift in policy to improve ties with Turkey.
• Georgia, too, is not properly complying with its WTO obligation of providing unobstructed access to Armenia to seas, said Minister Papoyan.
• Minister Papoyan explained why the Black Sea ferry project did not materialize. There was a time when Armenia was the one that desperately needed the ferry to transport the goods to Russia. Then Russia became the one that needed the Armenian goods, so Russia quickly expanded the Upper Lars capacity to accept the Armenian trucks. The ferry was no longer needed.
• To implement CEPA's economic component, a committee was formed, managed by the economy ministry. This committee consists of 3 sub-committees: geographical indication (GI) sub-committee, economic cooperation sub-committee, and customs sub-committee.
• The committee held a meeting on October 17 in Yerevan. They discussed 12 roadmaps for the implementation of CEPA.
• One of them is the renaming of Armenian cognac into Armenian brandy. Other topics relating to geographical indication and customs were discussed. The next meeting of the committee will be held this October in Brussels.
• The GI sub-committee recently discussed "cognac" and "champagne", the AM-EU legal framework around GI, etc.
• The economic cooperation and customs sub-committees held meetings in March 2023.
• Economic cooperation sub-committee has 12 roadmaps: trade of goods, customs, technical barriers, phytosanitary, services & electronic sales, payments and movement of capital, intellectual property rights, state purchases, trade & stable development, competition, state organizations, and transparency.
• Armenia informed the EU in October 2023 that it plans to rebrand Armenian cognac to Armenian brandy, which will be registered as an Armenian GI. This will allow Armenian producers to export and advertise domestic brandy. The EU has provided $2.9 million for the transition, which is in progress.
• Labs will be required to check the quality of exported brandy. The government must have a procedure for checking and certifying the quality.
• To sell a product under the GI Armenian Brandy, the company must meet the quality standards and use specific mechanisms of quality control during production. Every Armenian company that advertises its brandy as Armenian Brandy must meet these standards.
• Ruling QP MP urged the Government to ensure companies do not use cheap wheat spirit to produce low-quality alcohol and sell it as "brandy" under the new GI. The MP urged Armenia's inspection agencies to increase oversight of the wine industry as well.
• Some Armenian alcohol producers are taking additional steps to certify their goods to unlock exports to the EU, and this has raised their prices by ֏40 per liter, said Minister Papoyan. He wants the state to support Armenian laboratories that undergo processes to receive international accreditation. Many lab services are not available in Armenia, including due to a lack of specialists, so domestic producers are forced to send their products to European countries for certification, wait a long time, and pay a hefty sum.

Favorable tax policies for Armenian goods exported to the EU

• A QP MP asked if it's possible to revive or sign a new GSP+ preferential trade system. Armenia lost access to it after exiting the list of poor countries. Economy Minister Papoyan said there is currently the ATM (Autonomous Trade Measures) for some other countries, and as a result of Armenia's policy of strengthening ties with the EU, there could be an opportunity for Armenia to use ATM to export certain types of agricultural and industrial products without taxes. Armenia is negotiating for the EU to add Armenia to the list of beneficiaries of ATM.
• ATM would also allow Armenia to avoid major issues in the event of force majeure [if Russia cuts economic ties with Armenia].
• Countries that apply to receive tax waivers under ATM must submit a list of products they want to export to EU and negotiate with relevant EU agencies. Certain agricultural and industrial exports can be exported at 0%, and without quantity limits.
• Armenia has prepared a list of goods it wants to export to the EU under ATM and it will be submitted to the EU soon.
• The Armenian government and EU's Ambassador to Armenia recently discussed Armenia's possible inclusion in ATM.
• The GSP+ is a thing of the past unless Armenia becomes poor enough to once again qualify for it. The GDP per capita in Armenia is $8,200, which is above the average, let alone in the poverty zone [$4,000?].

Where does the EU plan to invest €2.6 billion in Armenia?

• €500M to 30,000 small and medium enterprises for a stable and competitive economy.
• €600M for North-South highway, tunnels, bridges.
• €220M digital transformation, science, and tech.
• €110M Syunik resilience.
• €170M to make Yerevan smart and green.
• €530M for accessible education.
• €470M water reservoirs, irrigation systems, landfills.
• The SME and infrastructure projects are still being developed. Some programs are already being implemented.

... Armenia is receiving technical assistance through the European Commission's TAIEX instrument

• TAIEX helps Armenian government bodies bring their legislation and standards closer to the EU.
• TAIEX sends expert groups for advisory and evaluation.
• The economy ministry developed and submitted TAIEX requests in 2023 to improve agriculture, capital markets, textile, tourism legislation, consumer protection, etc. Five have been approved and two have been fully implemented.
source, source, source,

PM Pashinyan receives the director of the European External Action Service

Pashinyan emphasized the consistent development and expansion of Armenia-European Union cooperation in political and economic directions.
Michael Siebert emphasized the EU's commitment and readiness to develop cooperation with Armenia. According to him, the EU will continue to actively contribute to the full implementation of the agenda for the expansion of relations with Armenia.
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Pashinyan forms an interdepartmental working group tasked with improving Armenia's position in the World Bank's Business Ready report

Business Ready (B-READY) is the World Bank’s new flagship report benchmarking the business environment and investment climate in most economies worldwide. The first B-READY report will be launched on September 25, 2024.
source, source,

pro-Russian opposition movement co-leader Bagrat Galstanyan says he discussed the situation in Armenia with ex-President Levon Ter-Petrosyan 15 days before the movement to oust PM Pashinyan

Galstanyan revealed that he is being advised by ex-President Levon Ter-Petrosyan's team on how to lead the movement.
REPORTER: Have you ever met any of the former presidents?
GALSTANYAN: I'm friends with the ANC party members and have close relations with many of LTP's associates. Throughout this process, they have given me advice on what to do, how to speak, where to place the emphasis, and I have followed it. I received advice on internal and external issues. They came and shared their stance; I accepted some and rejected others. I had relations with them prior to 2018 as well.
REPORTER: Do you plan to meet LTP?
GALSTANYAN: I met him before this movement. We held extensive discussions about the situation.
REPORTER: How long ago was that?
GALSTANYAN: About 15 days.
REPORTER: 15 days before May 9?
GALSTANYAN: No, [15 days] before Kirants. //
Bagrat Galstanyan went in front of the Human Rights Defender's office and demanded to meet her. She agreed to meet him and a group of protesters to discuss the issues in privacy. The meeting did not take place because Galstanyan demanded the meeting to be live-streamed.
In response to famous actor Hovhannes Azoyan's repeated criticism of his movement, Galstanyan urged journalists to wash their mouths after speaking Azoyan's name. He quickly apologized for his statement, before proceeding to call Azoyan a satan.
Authorities charged a protester with assaulting a police officer while the latter was attempting to remove a roadblock on the Yerevan-Meghri road. The incident happened earlier.
One protester is arrested for 1 month after the Friday clashes with the police in front of the foreign ministry. Another 4 are charged.
source, source, source, source, source, source, source, source, source, source,

Russia is no longer an attractive place for many Armenian migrant workers: Central Bank President Martin Galstyan

The share of remittances in GDP has gone from 18% a decade ago to 4.1% last year.
Last year the inflow was $5.7B (+9.7% YoY). Sources: $4B from Russia, $663M from USA, $141M from Switzerland, ...
Last year the outflow was $4B, so the net inflow was $1.7B.
source,

500-year-old Armenian church in Diyarbakir, Turkey, will be renovated

It was damaged during the 2023 earthquakes. The renovation project, approved and funded by the Turkish Culture and Tourism Ministry, aims to revive the church and will officially begin this month. The process will be supported by the Armenian community's resources and contributions.
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2 of the 8 sections of the railway destroyed during floods have been restored with the help of the Russian company that manages the Armenian railway: VIDEO

video, source,

at the request of the Armenian government, Switzerland deployed specialists to assess the structural strength of bridges and infrastructure in flood-affected areas

source,

Georgia's ruling party introduces another Putin-style law, this time to ban queer ‘propaganda’, gender affirmation treatment, and prevent queer people from adopting children

source,

Armenia and Serbia discussed defense cooperation

Defense Minister Papikyan met Serbian Ambassador and Defense Attaché. An agreement was reached to carry out work to sign an agreement between the Governments of Armenia and Serbia on defense cooperation. Topics regarding reforms being carried out in the Armenian Armed Forces and regional security were also discussed.
source,

the Road Department has acquired devices to check the reflectiveness of road paint and traffic signs: VIDEO

The M2 highway was checked to see if it meets the standards.
source,

anti-corruption: a customs agent is charged with extorting money from 11 Iranian cargo drivers

Pay or else you'll have problems.
source,

Armenian consumers continue to spend more: May 2024

Number of transactions with receipts: 60 million (+8 YoY)
Total value: ֏87 billion (+12% YoY)
source,

bear attacks a man picking plants in the field in village Arates

He noticed a bear and scared it away by making loud noises. However, he didn't notice the second bear nearby, which attacked the man, causing serious injuries. He is expected to survive.
source, source,

"When I was offered the part of The Dude in 'The Big Lebowski' (1998), I went through a big thing in my head worrying if this was going to be a bad example for my girls. The guy was kind of an anti-hero, a pot-smoking, slacker kind of guy, and I was really racking my brain about it. I always want to feel free to play any role, a despicable guy or a good guy -- the full range of human experience. But this one was really giving me problems. So I assembled the family and told them my problem. After a long pause, my middle girl said, 'Dad, you're an actor. We know that it's all pretend what you do. We know that when you kiss some lady on the screen that you still love Mom. We know you're an actor.' So I had their permission, their blessing, to go play a character like The Dude. That was great that they understood that. And I count on the audiences to understand that what I do in my personal life and what I do on the screen are not some kind of example for them to base their lives on. Hopefully, when people see a movie, they know it's a movie."
The Dude was based on independent film promoter Jeff "The Dude" Dowd, who helped the Coen brothers secure distribution for their first feature, "Blood Simple" (1984). Like his fictional counterpart, Dowd was a member of the Seattle Seven, and takes a casual approach to grooming and dress. The Port Huron Statement of which The Dude refers to himself as being one of the original authors, is a real document and statement written by The Students for a Democratic Society at a national convention meeting in, Michigan, June 11-15, 1962. Jeff Dowd was not one of those students, being twelve-years-old, as he was born on November 20, 1949.
According to Alex Belth, who wrote the e-book, "The Dudes Abide", on his time spent working as an assistant to the Coen Brothers, casting the role of Jeffrey Lebowski was one of the last decisions made before filming. Names tossed around for the role included Robert Duvall (who passed because he wasn't fond of the script), Anthony Hopkins (who passed, since he had no interest in playing an American), and Gene Hackman (who was taking a break at the time). A second "wish list" included an oddball "who's who", including Norman Mailer, George C. Scott, Jerry Falwell, Gore Vidal, Andy Griffith, William F. Buckley, and Ernest Borgnine. The Coens' ultimate Big Lebowski, however, was Marlon Brando. The Coens amused themselves by quoting some of their favorite Jeffrey Lebowski lines ("Strong men also cry") in a Brando imitation.
Before filming a scene, Jeff Bridges would frequently ask the Coen brothers "Did the Dude burn one on the way over?" If they said he had, he would rub his knuckles in his eyes before doing a take to make his eyes appear bloodshot.
A lot of the Dude's clothes in the movie were Bridges's own clothes, including his Jellies sandals, which he still owns and uses to this day. (IMDb)
Happy Birthday, Jeff Bridges!