Invitation letters to professors

Hello everyone,
I was accepted to Oregon State University's post-bacc program in computer science, which takes about 2 years and results in a B.S. in computer science. However, I'm seriously considering not enrolling and instead applying to the MCIT and possibly other grad school programs.
My first degree was in psychology, a B.S. where I took up to Calculus 2, but I took Precalc, Calc 1, and Calc 2 as PASS/no pass courses (I passed all of them). I started at community college with a 3.2 GPA and transferred to UCSD for upper division, where I earned a 3.8 GPA.
I have very limited programming experience. My biggest exposure was an intro to Python course at UCSD, which I took for PASS/NO PASS because I wasn't thinking ahead. I really enjoyed it but haven't practiced since graduating.
I graduated about 4 years ago, so getting a letter of recommendation now would be challenging. I'm considering taking some community college courses in computer science and discrete math, but I've heard that this could make me overqualified for the MCIT if I'm not careful.
I need letters of recommendation, which I could get from community college professors if I take courses with them. I’ve also heard about taking MOOCs, but since I work full-time, managing both CC courses and MOOCs might be tough. Plus, those CC courses could count toward prerequisites at other master's programs.
I hope to work in software development or engineering.
What do you think is my best path forward if I'm very interested in this program?
Thank you

I have been invited to a radiology program interview this coming Wednesday. I was needing tips on what to expect or what I should say. I have never had an interview so this will be my first! I went to a job shadow for this program (required) about a month ago, I asked the director of the program some questions:

1. what kind of questions should I be expecting for this interview?

Expect more behavioral questions around 14-15 of them.

1. Around how long should the interview last?

It will last around 20 minutes

1. Do you look at gpa or interview more?

We look at them all pretty equally from everything you submitted ( I was required to turn in my ACT scores, 2 recommendations letters, high school & college transcripts plus gpa)
This program means a lot to me, and it’s quite literally making me sick to my stomach. I’m terrified I’ll freeze up in front of everyone. I was wanting any advice, thanks!

No hat tricks etc
Fish: Can you take the gift & accept my invitation? We can both get free gifts this way!🎁 Download Temu App and search the code below to accept my invitation! 221883671
Farm: Could you do me a huge favor? 🥺Please accept my invite so that I can get free giftsCopy my code: 220929331
If u did it, comment the first few letters of ur user please along with the code. I keep doing the code for the people who haven’t actually done mine and then i run out of clicks for the person who actually did it :/ so pls comment the first few letters of ur user!!

Kings Landing
Lord Lyonel Mallister of Seagard sat back in the main room of his lodgings in Kings Landing with a bottle of Dornish red. He filled a large cup with some of the dark red wine and lifted the cup to his mouth. As he did so, he noticed his hand shook slightly. Whether it was from fear or rage or a combination of both, he wasn't sure.
The news of Jon Westerling's death at the hands of the Targaryen queen and her dragon had shaken him. Not so much the death itself, but the away it had reportedly been carried out. The Westerlings were neighbors of his, with the Crag located to the south of Seagard. The late Ser Jon had been over a decade younger than himself and while he had not known him personally, his own younger brothers had most probably encountered him.
Treason and rape were the charges. These were serious charges and yet there had been no trial.
Whatever the charges, nonetheless the manner of his death was a travesty. Summary justice dealt out at the hands of one of the Targaryen queens, who obviously believed herself to be beyond the law. He shook his head. Even queens were bound to observe the laws and customs of the land. Ser Jon had reportedly asked for trial by combat to defend his innocence. Even that had been denied him.
Lyonel resolved to send condolences to Lord Lyle on his brother's death. There was a Reyne involved too. A younger brother of Lord Reyne. Lyonel had not heard what his fate was.
Younger brothers. They were both a blessing and a trial. One of his own, he had not seen for some time, but Tristan was no doubt in KIngs Landing. Queen Visenya was present in the city, as was her son Prince Laenor. His brother was a member of what was normally known as the Kingsguard, being attached to Queen Visenya. It was now most likely known as the Queensguard, he thought with a wry smile.
Perhaps he should speak with his brother. And Lords Westerling and Reyne.
He moved to his writing desk and quickly penned three letters inviting the two lords and his brother Ser Tristan to dinner. He wasn't sure if any of them were in the mood to exchange pleasantries, given the current circumstances, but nevertheless the Lord of Seagard felt obliged to offer his hospitality and if necessary his concern and sorrow for the situation they had found themselves in
After the letters had been sent, he leant back in chair in reflection slowly sipping his wine. The bottle didn't take long to finish.

I keep seeing questions asked here by people who’ve been accepted or are waiting to be accepted about acceptance, majors, the college experience. I figured I’d start a thread of advice, tips, and things that either I or my friends wish they were told. I’ll break it down by bullet points. The social stuff is at the bottom for those solely interested in that. Hopefully other alums or upperclassmen will chime into.
College/Career Tips:

• Acceptance letters probably aren’t finalized yet. I hadn’t even been accepted at this time in the year that I got in. Give it a week or two before panicking.
  
• Research your major, if it’s post grad earnings aren’t profitable, either really game plan post grad and how to make it work for you, switch majors, or reconsider attending. That debt is life changing, you can’t get out of it, and there absolutely are wrong decisions. This is probably obvious to some, but I know enough people who got told just get any degree, it opens doors. That worked for the boomers. It doesn’t automatically work for you. Theres other ways to be successful.
  
• If you’re not sure about majors, then that’s natural, but I’d recommend community college while you figure it out. It’s a cheap way to knock out gen eds. This is also a cost effective way of attending college in general.
  
• Go to class and actually study. Imo if you’re doing college right, then you’re gonna have hella social opportunities. You still gotta take care of business. Some of those required classes are pointless and absolutely suck. And you still gotta go. Also go office hours if it’s a subject that you’re seriously interested in or the professor can help you.
  
• Getting a bad grad or failing a class isn’t the end of the world. You can still succeed. Don’t let it spiral. I say this because odds are, especially early, you will probably take an L. In that same vein, know when to retake and when to let it go. A fail is worth a retake, a 3.0 generally isn’t.
  
• Take internships seriously. A lot of jobs are looking for experience + the degree. But also you can make professional connections. Which actually can help you.
  
• Go visit your advisor. They can help you stay on track.
  
• Sleepless nights happen due to studying. Coffee is your friend and can help you power through.
  
• Not every night needs to be a sleepless night. Melatonin is your friend and can help you get back on schedule.
  
• You’re going to be tempted to drop out at some point. Thats probably a horrible decision. Again, the debt follows you regardless.
  
• Go to the damn gym. I’m not kidding, it’s a good way to lock back in if you’re stressed and is good for your mental health. But if that’s not enough then listen, dorm food and/or alcohol left unchecked = weight gain. I’ve seen freshman 15 snowball into senior 60. I’d imagine everyone reading doesn’t want that.
  
• Be social. You’re going to have to put yourself out there when you hit the professional world. You may as well start practicing now. So…
  

The Social/College Experience:

• Socially, the first two weeks of fall semester are going to be pretty important. After that, friend groups usually are formed, clubs aren’t running around recruiting all over the place anymore, and the frat parties are closed for the semester except for like Halloween. So plan to be hella active during those first couple of weeks.
  
• Keep your dorm room open. At least initially. Go exploring the halls and introduce yourself.
  
• Join a club, organization, or Greek Life. These are cheat codes to making friends and/or getting access to parties. You can google MSU clubs and see what interests you. If you’re looking to join an athletic club, I’d recommend reaching out now, they probably have summer work out plans that they want you on.
  
• Your RA holds all of the cards, you hold none. Do NOT get into a pissing contest with them unless you just love “random” inspections, having your door knocked frequently, or just petty bullshit. Be nice to your floor mates and anyone you bring over too. Even the coolest RA absolutely has time to humble a total asshole.
  
• If you can, find a group of friends that you can live with and get an apartment ASAP.
  
• Dating apps are secondary sources. Go talk to people. Approach that person at the party, or in class, or at the bar. Worst case, they’re not feeling you, in which case hold that L and move on. You got 50k students on campus, somebody will like you.
  

Bars: Probably more a transfer thing. But…Rick’s is a beautiful shitshow, just enjoy it. Harper’s is either hit or miss, but when it hits, IT HITS. Hopcat has good food. Fieldhouse was okay. Dublins is more an alum bar on game days. Crunchy’s is an alum/upperclassmen bar it’s also lowkey the best bar.

Hi! I would just like to ask here if anyone knows about what meritorious reasons are accepted to be able for blacklisted pagibig buyers to be allowed to purchase.
For context, our house has been foreclosed and now an acquired asset and we are now issued an invitation to offer to purchase. Previously, we wanted to buy it through long term installment but told that we were no longer allowed to (because blacklisted blabla). Now, we just received this letter and I searched about it and i run across Pagibig CIRCULR NO 428, which states that:
Blacklisted buyeproponent/developer may still be allowed to purchase PAG-IBIG Fund acquired assets due to meritorious reasons subject to the approval of the Deputy Chief Executive Officer for Home Lending Operations Cluster.
Does anyone know what this means? Any advice is highly appreciated.

If you’re new to the community, introduce yourself! Yup this is a letter from the head mod! Rules are: Do not have one letter answers or description because it is confusing. Also, I am the founder of this subreddit, and, I am online very often and please post! Invite more members!

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/ThrowRA_idkidkidk1
Friend’s sister (20’sF) was openly flirting with my husband (40M) in front of me (31F). I told her off publicly and now they want a public apology from me. What action should I take so that I don’t ruin my friendship?
Originally posted to relationship_advice
Thanks to u/_ThinkerBelle_ for suggesting this BoRU
Previous BoRU
TRIGGER WARNING: manipulation, sexual harassment, obsessive behavior, slander
Original Post March 12, 2024
I(31F) am close friends with Lisa (33F) we met at college, and became roommates and I love her to death. Lisa has a sister ‘Amy’ (20’s F) whom I’ve met occasionally in college but she was so young at that time we never really hung out.
Lisa had a bridal shower in February and I financially contributed to most of it since I wasn’t able to be there in person to help with the planning. I gave money to Amy to pay for everything, the decor, food and alcohol. I even paid for an overnight stay at a hotel for all 7 girls. I did all of this because I couldn’t make it to her bachelorette party the week before, I had also paid for the limo Amy wanted to host the party in. At the shower I saw Amy and she was gushing about how I had spent a lot of money on Lisa. I just said if it’s for Lisa I would have paid for anything. Amy was hinting that my job was paying so much money for me to spend on Lisa this much. I’m a new surgeon just graduated from residency, i got a pay bump but not a lot. I’m lucky because my husband is supporting me while I go through fellowship. My husband (40M) is a doctor too but so much more advanced in his career than me. For my wedding gift he paid off the remainder of my student loans. He is amazing and I am obsessed with him.
Wedding happened in March, my husband and I came for the wedding. Family and close friends were invited to Lisa’s parent’s place for dinner after. Amy was very handsy with my husband even during the wedding she was asking him about his job how smart he was to be working in the ICU how hot he was how he looks like a young Alain Delon bla bla. My husband was giving me signals to come to him and I did. This happened at least 2 more times. At Lisa’s parent’s, Amy was wrapping her arm around my husbands back and was serving him drinks and food. I told Lisa’s mom about how Amy’s making me and my husband very uncomfortable and her mom pulled her aside and told her off i think because she came out grumpy. She was still acting like a crazed teenager because when we wanted to leave she wouldn’t give my husband his jacket back to him and kept sniffing it. I had a feeling that she was drunk and completely out of it. My husband raised his voice and told her to stop messing around and give it to him. I yelled “can you stop being so difficult you’ve been shamelessly flirting with my husband in front of me the whole day give me the damn jacket and leave us alone”.
I got a text from Lisa’s mom demanding I publicly apologize to Amy as in post on social media a heartfelt apology because some of the guests heard me yell at her and thought I was overreacting and humiliated her.
Lisa is on my side and told me Amy has always had gold digging tendencies and that this isn’t the first time she’d done something like this. She flirted with her friend’s dad and their next door neighbour who is married when she thought that they were wealthy. Lisa said that she’ll handle it. I already felt so bad I ruined the last moments of her wedding day and now she has to deal with this. I’m ruminating on this a lot lately and wondering if I should apologize to Amy. I don’t want to but then again if I did, I would explain exactly what happened and how it merited my reaction to her. Though this might add fuel to the fire. There is so much drama right now and I want to preserve my friendship with Lisa.
TLDR: friend’s sister flirting with my husband, i ‘embarrassed’ her and now she wants a public apology. I’m thinking of doing it but detailing exactly what happened and might paint her in a bad light. But all this drama could cost my friendship with my friend.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
jamicam

Are the guests at the wedding also your Facebook friends? I don't understand how a public apology on social media would work in this case... I mean, I imagine the guests include aunts, uncles, neighbors, etc., of the family. Are they really going to see your FB apology?

OOP

Her mom wants me to tag her and Lisa so that their family can see it. I don’t even use facebook anymore but her family are still active on it.

jamicam

If you don't use FB then there's your answer.
Lisa said she'll handle it. I'd let this alone.

Update March 18, 2024
Keeping it as short as I can and typos galore cuz I’m oncall.
Previous post got so popular that Amy’s mom found it and texted me to take down (in all caps). I got around to read most of the comments a day after I posted when I finished my shift. I didn’t not apologize to anyone or did anything at all frankly I forgot about it since I had people close to dying on me left and right at work. I gaslit Amy’s mom into thinking that I never did such a thing and that I did not have a Reddit account (she believed it I think since she didn’t text me back, cmon the details I put in that post were exactly what she experienced and she didn’t find it odd?).
For clarification:

1. One of you said I had a spine of a jellyfish (loved that comment) and not apologizing was the right thing to do. I was hesitant and was actually considering giving that apology because of the fact that she fed me and let me stay in her home during thanksgiving and Christmas many years ago when I couldn’t go home to my family. I’m the kind of person who’ll remember every good thing you do for me and do my best to reciprocate or get even so as to not be indebted to you. Idk what kind of mental illness is that, I never retained much of the psychiatric info from medschool.
   
2. A lot of people insinuated that me being docile and restrained in those kinds of situations makes me a bad surgeon to which i say i beg your effing pardon. Would you want someone who’s operating on you have a criminal record for causing bodily harm/homicide? Also I’ve dealt with worse than Amy I’ve survived handling 19 psychotic patients with TBIs for a whole rotation. Me being aggressive would have gotten me kicked out of my fellowship.
   

Things that have transpired:

1. I tried to avoid contacting Lisa since she went off on her honeymoon but because of the popularity of my previous post I decided to give her a heads up. Lisa was more than apologetic, in fact she facetimed me and we had a very teary conversation about her family. There were a lot more going on that I never knew but mine and my husband’s involvement in her family drama was the last straw. She had decided to go no contact with her mom and sister. She also warned me that Amy might approach my husband in some way but no idea how. She’s also getting her extended family involved about Amy.
   
2. My husband does not have any social media (so hot) and he did not give out his number to anyone at all during the wedding. He is anal about loyalty and transparency in our marriage. We have access to each other’s electronics. I know he would never cheat on me. 3 days ago someone called my husband’s clinic asking to get his number for an ‘emergency’ and that she needed to get a hold of his wife. The nurse who answered refused to give a physician’s personal number and the conversation got heated. My husband’s colleague, another intensivist, took over and asked her to tell him what the emergency was so that he could tell my husband himself. The person on the phone argued some more and when the doctor wouldn’t give she hung up. That friend told my husband what happened and said the woman didn’t give her name but had a very high pitched child-like voice. My husband immediately knew it was Amy but we have no proof. I know it was her, she must have searched my husband’s name on google and found where he worked since his professional profile is online along with the name of his hospital.
   

I’m getting more and more irritated by this whole thing and have gone full on mama bear mode over my husband. He was furiously annoyed after the wedding and was saying if the genders were switched he would have definitely gotten punched not even halfway through the wedding. My husband had terrible experiences with women before, two women at different times tried to baby trap him, one did some Sherlock level manipulation and one harassed us when we were dating. He is usually a cool and calm guy but now he hasn’t been smiling or joking around with me like he always does ever since the wedding.
Anywho, my uncle (our lawyer) was consulted, security at my husband’s dept and around our home have been notified. Thank you guys.
PS: Kelly if you’re reading this, do something about your younger daughter before something bad happens. Also you don’t deserve your older daughter.
Edit: a Moriarty level manipulation…now that makes more sense not sherlock tf
RELEVANT COMMENTS
I3ex_G

Damn, can your lawyer uncle draft a letter to scare Amy? Just outlining what she is doing is harassment and the outcome if she continues? Sounds like Amy might need mental help and threats of repercussions might force her mother’s hand to getting her help. Is the dad around? I hope other family members will start pressuring Amy to get help

OOP

Nope, we couldn’t prove it was Amy that called. We just have to wait and see if she does anything. Our only hope is that she stays broke and can’t afford to travel to where we live since it’s far from hers. Her dad’s dead. I hope so too.

~
procrastinating_b

Why’s everyone got an uncle lawyer lol

OOP

I’m half Asian. That uncle is Asian too. That should answer your question

Forsaken_Woodpecker1

I’m rolling this response is hilarious 🤣

NEW UPDATE

Update 2 - Final Update May 16, 2024
I’ll try and see if I can update on here since I cant update again on relationships advice. Posts are in my profile for now.
I’ve got so many dms wanting an update but some (legal things) happened since and I couldn’t tell especially since everyone that was involved knows about this post already.
We have the number of the woman who called but it wasn’t Amy’s number (I have her number) but she could’ve gotten another number. At that time, I was almost confident it was her so I got the name of the person the phone number was registered to. We’ll call her Cece Smith. What threw me off was this person had been using that number for 7 years BUT I later found out this woman lived/lives in the area Amy lives. I called Lisa to ask if she knew who Cece is and lo and behold Cece is Amy’s best friend. I told Lisa about the call to the clinic, she went silent, said she had to go and ended the call.
The next day (March 21st) Lisa texted me that she had gotten a verbal confession from Amy about the call to my husband’s clinic. Not only that, when everything happened right after the wedding, I had not blocked Amy from my instagram yet. She must have gone through my followers list and found my husband’s family, dm-ed them with ‘evidence’ that I was cheating on him. Wedding was on March 10th, the call was on March 15th, I blocked her March 16th. Some time after March 10th she had found and gotten in contact with my MIL, 2 SILs and my niece who is 13 years old about my ‘infidelity’. There were skeptical thank God and contacted my husband on March 23rd. I swear to god this girl is so stupid i dont get why she would waste her time on doing this and doing it very poorly at that. My SIL sent a screenshot of the chat from “mizz_(Amy’s real name)” to my husband and he wanted to throw his phone to the wall. Lisa sent me the recording of the entire call she had with Amy admitting to everything and some serious threats about what she would do to me. One of which that she was going to report me to my state medical board (no basis whatsoever like I said, she is an idiot, the premium kind).
We got in touch with my uncle (yes the lawyer who u guys were so baffled about seriously why is it so surprising that I have an uncle who’s a lawyer his wife is a lawyer and so is their daughter, they are a very righteous family idk what else to say), we sent a C&D letter telling Amy to not contact me, husband and in-laws and I let my chief of surgery and head of my program know about this just in case.
March 29th she really reported me to the medical board (it doesn’t have to be doctor-patient related, a doctor could be harassing someone in the grocery store and a witness can report that doctor to the board, THAT is the purpose of creating this avenue to complain) even though they were warned about this, they still had to do the preliminary investigations on me and interview me to hear my side. Major pain in the ass for me especially since I’m 5-months pregnant. The case on me is closed.
April 3rd Amy dm-ed my niece again with ‘new evidence’ of my infidelity. My sweet niece ran to her mom who told my husband and me. We got a court ordered restraining order against her now. When all of this happened, Lisa was helping me along the way, the cherry on top was when Lisa had access to Amy’s email and her instagram (she never logged out), posted how she tried to homewreck a marriage and outing Amy online with screen shots and snippets of the phone call. Lisa changed her password and Amy couldn’t log in to delete it. Lisa made this known to her entire family and they are putting pressure on her mom (hi Kelly) to rein her in. I dont know the specifics but they are using the family inheritance or some heirloom as a bargaining chip for her to behave good. The girl has some mental issues for sure would love to give her a lobotomy.
I hope to god this is the last of this and Amy stays away from us but I have this gnawing feeling that she’s going to try something again. Lisa is the hero in this honestly, she’ll continue to keep an eye out to see if Amy starts shit again (if she does Lisa’s going to hire a hitman so she says).
I dont even know how to TLDR this. Read it or don’t. I hope this is the final update. To the people who don’t believe this happened it did happen but since it’s so unreal, i don’t blame you.
Ps- husband and I are going to couples counseling together as per advised in the comments of the prior post. We are doing very well, he’s planning an intimate gender reveal soon for me (he knows the gender since he’s a trained sonographer lol).
If there’s any question I’ll be happy to answer. Will delete this account in a few days
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP
DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7

Basically title. I know at best physics 1 and 2, and my REU is in theoretical nuclear physics, which understanding any of the research papers take a lot of base knowledge to begin with [that I’m lacking]. I’m scared that:
a) I won’t be able to contribute at all b) I won’t have anything to present at the end of the program c) I won’t be able to continue working on the research even after the program (my professor at my home institution told me to try to do well so I could possibly continue working for them virtually since we don’t have a theoretical nuclear physics program) d) let alone get a good rec letter or publication out of it
On that note, I’ve been having crises of imposter syndrome a lot as the start of the REU gets closer. It’s my summer between freshman and sophomore year, and the fact that the program chose me over any other junior or senior that has better research experience + undergrad physics knowledge is making me really doubt myself.
Please leave words of advice and share your own experiences if you are willing. How do I make the most out of the REU and leave my advisor and head professor impressed?

I don't know about you, but I've been interested in Nintendo making a Mario game where a normally good character turns evil out of their own volition (but is redeemed in the end, of course). I'm tired of the possession storylines, if you know what I mean. That said, I think the best possible choice as to who turns evil is Peach, as it increases the stakes for Mario to unprecedented levels while also avoiding ripping off well-known fan games like I Hate You.
I previously came up with a Mario & Luigi game where Peach is tricked by a treacherous advisor into looking into a magic mirror which causes her to lose all self-control, give into her long-suppressed anger and hatred towards Bowser and the Koopas, and become a warmongering tyrant in her own right. Of course, in the end Mario and Luigi manage to undo the spell and once restored Peach vows to make things truly right.
Now here's a Paper Mario version: PAPER MARIO: THE RETURN OF THE QUEEN
The game starts with Bedlam, Marilyn, and Doopliss wandering around doing whatever. At some point, one of them comes to an important realization. When the Shadow Queen possessed Peach in TTYD, Peach gained the Shadow Queen's memories. Those memories stayed in Peach's brain even after the Shadow Queen was defeated, and presumably are still in her brain even now. With this realization, Bedlam decides to return to villainy, and persuades Marilyn and Doopliss to join her. The Three Shadows are back, baby!
In Rogueport, Professor Frankly retires and Goombella takes over... whatever position he holds. Goombella sends letters to Mario, Luigi, Peach, and Toadsworth, asking them to come to Rogueport as quickly as possible. When they arrive, she tells them that the Three Shadows are once again trying to resurrect the Shadow Queen, and that they must collect seven... I'll call them "McGuffins" for now, feel free to propose something more original in the comments before the Three Shadows do. Mario and Luigi set out to retrieve them. Peach wants to come with them, but Goombella persuades her and Toadsworth to stay with her...
As Mario and Luigi search for the... McGuffins, they run into a few of Mario's TTYD partners and a few of Luigi's TTYD partners, all who join the party. They also make an unlikely friend... Lord Crump, who too joins their party. Together, they venture to new locations while also revisiting some old ones, and we get to see what the legacy characters have been up to since the Shadow Queen's defeat. Each Chapter ends with a Peach intermission. With each intermission, Goombella acts increasingly out of character while playing mind games with Peach about her prior possession. Toadsworth is initially oblivious, but he becomes more and more concerned over time. Eventually, he confronts Goombella... and then he mysteriously disappears...
When Mario, Luigi, and their partners return to Rogueport with all seven... McGuffins, they find that Peach has once again taken on her "Shadow Peach" form. Except this time, she's not possessed. Thanks to Goombella's mind games she has allowed the Shadow Queen's memories to corrupt her own soul, and now vows to finish what the Shadow Queen started. Oh, and Goombella is revealed to have been Doopliss the entire time; the real Goombella along with Professor Frankly and Toadsworth have been sealed in the shadows by Bedlam and Marilyn.
The final battle has Mario once again fighting Shadow Peach, but this time he decides to use diplomacy in addition to force, thinking that Peach still has good in her. And guess what? It pays off. Peach regains control of her senses and suppresses the Shadow Queen's memories, which are later removed from her brain for good thanks to the genius of Professor E. Gadd (who FINALLY appears in a Paper Mario game after all these years). During the closing cutscene, our favorite couple finally do what we've wished that they do since forever... they kiss.
THE END
So, what do you think? Share your thoughts below!

I have been invited to a radiology program interview this coming Wednesday. I was needing tips on what to expect or what I should say. I have never had an interview so this will be my first! I went to a job shadow for this program (required) about a month ago, I asked the director of the program some questions:

1. what kind of questions should I be expecting for this interview?

Expect more behavioral questions around 14-15 of them.

1. Around how long should the interview last?

It will last around 20 minutes

1. Do you look at gpa or interview more?

We look at them all pretty equally from everything you submitted ( I was required to turn in my ACT scores, 2 recommendations letters, high school & college transcripts plus gpa)
This program means a lot to me, and it’s quite literally making me sick to my stomach. I’m terrified I’ll freeze up in front of everyone. I was wanting any advice, thanks!

I have been invited to a radiology program interview this coming Wednesday. I was needing tips on what to expect or what I should say. I have never had an interview so this will be my first! I went to a job shadow for this program (required) about a month ago, I asked the director of the program some questions:

1. what kind of questions should I be expecting for this interview?

Expect more behavioral questions around 14-15 of them.

1. Around how long should the interview last?

It will last around 20 minutes

1. Do you look at gpa or interview more?

We look at them all pretty equally from everything you submitted ( I was required to turn in my ACT scores, 2 recommendations letters, high school & college transcripts plus gpa)
This program means a lot to me, and it’s quite literally making me sick to my stomach. I’m terrified I’ll freeze up in front of everyone. I was wanting any advice, thanks!

Hi all!
Do I need a formal invite letter for a business trip? It’s a short 5 hour trip I am doing using my professional development program by my firm in London. I basically fly in, attend a few workshops/meetings and fly back out. Obviously these events/workshops are open for professionals - they didn’t specifically invite me. I have email threads with the director of the center hosting it about meeting me there and a formal confirmation of registration email laying out the time of meeting, purpose and my “invite”.
I am a bit pressed for time so unsure if I need to get this letter - it’ll take abt 7 days for them to get me this letter.
Can I apply with the emails and confirmation I have? Along with a letter from my employer confirming it’s for my professional development? I have 3 Schengen visas before (all for business trips) but since they had specifically invited me to give a talk, it was a bit different….

I asked my professor for a letter of recommendation on May 5. He agreed and said that he would meet me in-person on May 13 to discuss. He was very kind and seemed that he would write me a good letter of recommendation (I had never interacted with him during class, but he still seemed willing to write me a LOR).
Anyway, on the same day I met with him, I sent him the official request from the application portal. I gave him a deadline of June 10. I didn't receive any updates from him. So, on May 19, I emailed him asking whether he received the email request. No response even now.
I am getting worried whether he will submit it. He is pretty old and had a surgery recently, so I am trying to be considerate, but this is causing me severe anxiety. Another professor had agreed to write a LOR as well on May 14, but I told him that the other professor already agreed. Now that it is May 22, should I just retract the request and ask the other professor for a LOR instead? I feel like this isn't enough time for the new professor now and don't know if that will affect the quality of the LOR.

I’m out!
After NINE months of applying (minus giving myself a break off applying during Christmas holidays because, as everyone knows, applying for a job… is a second job) and COUNTLESS rejection and “unfortunately” emails ….. IM OUT!
I got a job in local government. I’m gone! I’m gone I’m gone I’m gone!!!
I have a strong background in retail/customer service and have a second job in that industry currently, so I feel like that (might have?) helped me.
My biggest advice is:

• Go on chatgpt. Prompt chatgpt by letting it know your situation - you are a teacher in transition looking to transition to ______ industry/field. Type in one of your resume dot points for teaching such as “Wrote key learning programs across grade 6” and ask chatgpt to change it to something related to the industry you are looking for. The dot point will become relevant to the industry you are looking to transition into. I don’t recommend copying and pasting it, as teachers we know chatgpt can come off wordy and something won’t be quite right, but it’s a great starting point. I remember redoing my entire resume took me about four hours.
  
• Be honest in your either extended responses (if the website asks for that rather than a cover letter) or in cover letter. Admit that you do not have knowledge in whatever application that they want you to have experience in. However, identify your strengths by saying you do have knowledge and were quick to adapt to the application/software/website your school uses and you have experience in Microsoft teams/google. Show off our strengths! We have sooooo many strengths and we are soooo adaptable. Explain it. Explain how we come across and serve clients with many backgrounds, whether it be social, cultural or based on age.
  

Please do not give up! Someone will take a chance on you by inviting you to an interview and you WILL blow them away with all your knowledge, experience, all the innovative things that we do as teachers!!!!
I’m so excited to never have to deal with a helicopter parent again! Especially as the Covid remote learning kids are beginning to grow up!!! I’m so excited to never have to deal with a narcissistic leader who has had no experience in hr and really should not have that role unless they do a diploma (or something!!!) in human relations and learn how to speak to their colleagues and LEAD their colleagues properly!!!!!!!
Once again, don’t give up!!

demographics: asian male from competitive bay area public :)
intended major: econ/business/sport management
act: 35
uw gpa: 3.97 weighted gpa: 4.32 (top 10%)
coursework: 11 aps
awards: congressional silver
state deca finalist
national econ challenge state qualifier
national french challenge silver
presidential service gold
top ecs: educational reform community service group
founder, recruited team of 10+ active tutors, tutored 50+ kids in underrepresented area, hosted monthly connection and speaker events
powerlifting
nationals winner, created and grew personal social media to 10k+ followers, actively coaching 10+ clients from social media
econ research assistant w/ local professor
gathered data and created figures surrounding HR and labor econ for his undergrad and MBA textbook
econ research assistant w/ professor
gathered and analyzed data surrounding sports economics, nba related
independent econ research
analyzed and created paper revolving around sports mega events impact, in publication process
growth intern @ ai company
spearheaded partnerships w/ 10+ influencers (100k-1mil followers), posted weekly reels (+50% views)
marketing intern @ nonprofit
president and officer of a few clubs (econ, deca, lifting)
rec letters: 5/10 (i do well in the class but i don’t really talk to the teacher), 7/10 (biz teacher, solid relationship), 8.5/10 (math teacher related to the educational reform service group)
essays: got some uc piq ideas but still unsure for common app
deciding on either vanderbilt, duke, brown, or northwestern for ed, feel free to give feedback on my app or give school suggestions! looking mainly for a good work hard play hard school (ik that’s like all the top schools 😭)

We applied in Vancouver. Arrived at the visa center Wednesday ~10am, we were out around 11:20am. We booked an appointment online but it was useless, had to line up to get a ticket number in the same line as everyone else. They didn’t even look at our appointment confirmation page that we printed out when we handed it to them.
Things to prepare: - passport - Printed application - Physical visa photo (they didn’t take ours because the digital one qualified but should have one in case) - Photocopy of passport info page - Photocopy of old passport & previous visa (if you have) - Photocopy of driver license or proof of address - Letter of invitation (filled out the template from their website) - Photocopy of the inviting party‘s ID (make sure it’s clear, we saw several people denied because theirs were too dark/had reflection)
We also prepared planned itinerary/plane tickets but they didn’t check. We heard some other people being asked for it at the counter, though we’re not sure if it was for Q2 visa or other type.
There are computers and printers available if you need to edit/print/photocopy stuff but there was constantly a line so better to have everything prepared. We had all the sufficient documents, took ~5 mins at the counter to process the applications and take our fingerprints. We applied for a 10 year multiple entry visa, they gave us 9 years. Cost was about $130CAD per person. Ready for pick up in 5 days.

Hey guys I am an international student studying in Calgary and my mum wanted to visit me but her visitor visa got rejected recently with the sole reason of insufficient finance... however her proof of funds was about 70,000 CAD cash in the bank statement and I believe that this is more than enough to stay for 3 weeks. Background: My mom has no intent to stay here forever or anything has well established businesses back home and an amazing travel history with multiple visits to the US etc. What's the reason behind the rejection I don't understand should I just reapply again for her addressing this in the letter of explanation and with recent bank statements. And also her previous application was as a tourist should I now make it an invitation from a family member and write her an invitation letter or stay with the tourist reason.

A little over a week ago we had some law profs from the U of A and U of C sign some letter saying stuff like "we want to express our deep concern about the violent infringement of students’ right to protest..." blah blah, some legal argument, blah blah, etc., you get the idea. Now, this really should mean something, one would think. These are supposedly legal experts who have spent years studying the law and if they think something terribly concerning is happening regarding protests, than it must be terribly concerning... right?
Well... no. You see these are all mostly hard-core lefty profs. And it just so happens that the issue that the protesters are passionate about, (Palestinians) is (gasp) the same issue that the lefty profs are also passionate about! What are the odds!!!
We need to understand that if this protest had been a pro-abortion, or anti-vax, or some other right-wing pet issue these same profs who are currently outraged at some mild police actions would have been applauding the totally appropriate police response to boot those dangerous righty troublemakers off university campus, (if) it were the other way around.
The first statement below in response to the encampment removal is from the Alberta NDP, the second is from the lefty profs.

https://x.com/RachelNotley/status/1789352220456259599
It is unacceptable that student protest is treated as a public safety issue, especially in the wake of a similarly excessive response at the University of Calgary.
https://ablawg.ca/2024/05/14/an-open-letter-regarding-the-response-to-recent-protests-at-the-universities-of-alberta-and-calgary/ Arguments that the trespass notices are justified by fire hazards or other safety or operational issues cannot be sustained in light of the fact that the students do not appear to have been given a meaningful opportunity to understand and rectify any such concerns before the notices were served.

They both seem quite similar don't they. How about that. Basically the argument is, - yeah we know that camping isn't allowed on university grounds and there are a whole host of reasons why... but can't you make an exception just this once? For this very important issue? We reeeeaaally care about it!
In other words this isn't a serious argument that would set legal precedent as much as it is like a bunch of children begging the adults to break the rules just this once so they can get what they want. It's juvenile, activist, legal manipulation from blatant partisan hacks dressed up as law professors. And the law professors are doing exactly what lawyers (also experts in the law) do. They find sections of law that could favour their clients and argue the merits. It doesn't mean that they are right or that their clients aren't guilty. It just means you've got a bunch of partisan law experts arguing for their own cause.
Interestingly, a lot of the prof names on this particular letter are the same prof names that signed on to a previous letter when lefty university types became outraged over Alberta gov't proposed changes to Trans care. Because just like every wannabe internet sleuth or know-it-all on social media these law experts are also 'experts' in all other things including medical and psychological care for children. https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/calgary/trans-letter-law-professors-rights-smith-1.7116436
And a lot of the same names were behind another letter proposing to make swearing allegiance to the monarch optional back in 2022. 32 Alberta law professors sign letter calling for government to make oath to Queen optional CBC News So pretty much anything that swings ideologically left is what these profs are backing every... single... time. Which isn't a problem unless the public decides that these biased huckster opinions actually mean more than your average politically polarized welder, accountant, IT consultant, farmer or anyone else who weighs in on a politicalized subject. Unfortunately, the media (who also skew left) tend to hold up these university professor opinions as if they are not biased and polarized and instead present them as if they are simply very knowledgeable and impartial, which they clearly are not.
In the list of professors signing this letter telling authorities to - please let our beloved Palestinian protesters camp - , you have a U of A ass. prof (Florence Ashley) weighing in on X calling Edmonton Police ACAB. All Cops Are Bastards. (Which is different than your average ignorant reddit post how?) You have another U of A prof Ubaka Ogbogu saying " University administrators and other fascists-in-training are weaponizing safety..." Calling everyone who disagrees with you 'fascist'. How refreshingly simple for such a learned man. Some of the other names, Lorian Hardcastle, Shaun Fluker, Nigel Bankes, are more-or-less constant lefty activists who are grinding their lefty axes pretty much every day. MOST UNIVERSITIES ARE LIKE THIS!! There are a few sane balanced thinkers left who haven't given over their entire soul to the ideological cause but those are mostly older profs from another era. In todays common university mindset, the whole complex world is stupidly boiled down into a (custom-made for idiots) colonizer and victim paradigm. Which somehow plays nicely into the age-old habit of hating on Jews. (Oops, "Zionists", totally different. My bad)
The uni profs run a risk of losing what's left of their credibility in the eyes of the public if they aren't careful and there may be a sense already that the indoctrinated (sorry 'educated') elites are on the wrong side of the general sentiment in this situation. It was refreshing to see even on lefty reddit that there was substantial support for the police using reasonable force to prevent the illegal protesters from camping. There have been gov't funding (read taxpayer funding) issues popping up lately in regards to how much public cash universities get. If the esteemed professors keep demonstrated to the average citizen that they have gone over the edge of looney tunes extremism and have little to offer in terms of rational thought, its going to be easy and popular for the gov't to squeeze them a bit and see how they manage to survive solely on the back of their own extremist radical ideals.
Good luck professors!!!

I graduated in December with a CS degree and after 5 months of applying almost every day, I have had extremely low interaction and only 2 interviews. I have tried both spamming applications and curating my resumes and cover letters to job postings. I have a couple of decent projects and a slightly applicable internship, but a pretty poor resume in general. I made one of those projects after graduating and spent a good amount of time planning, researching tools , and implementing them but it didn't increase my interactions. I feel as there are many candidates better than me and I feel like the best way to catch up would be getting a masters and the experiences and opportunities that come with it.
My school offered an option to easily apply to their master's program if you've recently graduated. I applied and I was accepted into their Computer Science graduate program. They have a data science track that aligns with my dream of working with sports data. I only have a part-time job and all of the funds would go to housing, food, and transportation, so I would be covering tuition with loans. It would amount to about 35k in loans if I finish the program in a year and I only have 5k in loans from my bachelors. I would really like to dive into the community at the university and try to become a research assistant, find a club to join, and interact with my professors to network and grow my potential for opportunities. I just don't know if it's worth the cost and time.
TL;DR Unemployed for 5 months after graduation with CS degree. Got into Master's with a data science track but it will cost 35k. Master's feels like the only way to catch up with other candidates because I have a bad resume.
I'm just looking for people's thought on what I should do. Thanks for reading.

Reposted with permission of the original author. Original thread is located here.
The 11th and final volume in Janny Wurts' mega epic Wars of Light and Shadow series gets an ebook and audiobook release tomorrow (at the time of posting), and yet it still seems to me that her work is criminally underread around here. So allow me to be your guide and help you explore her wonderful works.
First off, here's what to expect from every work on this list: If you're coming to any of her works expecting an easy, 'popcorn'/blockbuster style read you're probably going to bounce right off; Janny is not only a beautiful prose writer who is able to put you right into the shoes of her characters in a way that few others can, but she also often tackles pretty hefty themes in her works as well and asks the reader to engage with them on a mental level instead of explicitly spelling everything out. These are often not easy reads, and skimming is highly discouraged, however because of the higher engagement on a mental and emotional level the payoffs are more than worth it, at least in my humble opinion.
On top of that, all of her works pack a 1-2 punch of sorts, where around the halfway point of the story it seems that everything is coming to its climax - only instead, somehow, Janny is able to keep ratcheting the tension up more and more, turning the last half of any novel into an extended climax of sorts that, while thrilling, can also be emotionally exhausting if you're not prepared for or expecting it.
And best of all, none of her novels end with a cliffhanger. All of her works are, if not self-contained, then at least end with a definite sense of some closure by the last page.
Now then, with that out of the way:
If you've read Raymond E. Feist's original Riftwar trilogy: You've probably already read The Empire Trilogy co-written by both Feist and Wurts, but if you have not yet then you really owe it to yourself to do so as it's a fabulous work. Set on Kelewan during the time of Magician, the story follows Mara's rise to power as she deftly maneuvers her way up the the political ladder of the Tsuranuanni. First book is Daughter of the Empire.
If you're a fan of old-school Swords and Sorcery: Master of Whitestorm would be right up your alley. Starting off as a series of relatively stand-alone adventures, by the halfway point it turns into a character study of the character of Korendir and finding out just what, exactly, drives him to risk life and limb over and over again. Also, be prepared to cry.
If you prefer some sci-fi mixed in with your fantasy: You will probably enjoy the Cycle of Fire trilogy, which finds Jaric and his friends as they help an old wizard fight against a demon horde alien invasion. Quite possibly the most YA-esque of Janny's works, this is nonetheless a good read that Janny might plan to revisit some day (she has another work drafted out in the same world under the tentative title of Starhope). Stormwarden is the first novel in this trilogy.
If court politics with more than a little dash of romance sounds appealing to you: Give Sorcerer's Legacy a try. A standalone tale, this tale follows Elienne, the queen of a just-conquered kingdom who we first meet imprisoned as a spoil of war, her husband vanquished during said kingdom conquering when she is visited by a wizard from a far off land and present with a choice: Either stay and face certain death from her kingdom's conqueror's, or be spirited off to the far off Kingdom of Pendaire and become the bride of its Prince, with her husband's unborn child the gambit to save the Prince's fate who has been rendered sterile by the black magic of his political enemies, unable to produce an heir. It's a rip-roaring good tale of court politics, romance, time travel, and magical clashes.
If you enjoy lush prose and want to read about thrilling chases, yet more political intrigue, and the best damn horses I've ever seen in a fantasy novel: Pick up To Ride Hell's Chasm and you won't be disappointed. As the princess Anja of Sessalie goes missing on the day of her wedding to secure an alliance with a neighboring kingdom, the capital city erupts into chaos as the task of finding her falls to two people: Taskin, the stern-but-fair Commander of the Royal Guard who guards the royal family, and Mykkael, the foreign born Commander of the City Garrison, who must also battle bigotry and racist prejudice as he searches for any clue on what happened to the Princess. Courtly intrigue gives way to one of the longest chase scenes I've seen in fantasy as the second half of the novel consists of the titular ride through the rather aptly named Hell's Chasm. Plus: absolutely beautiful prose, heavy themes tackled such as the letter of the law vs the spirit of the law, and the fantasy version of gun-kata in the form of barqui'ino.
If you're not feeling up to the commitment of a full novel just yet: You're in luck, as Janny has a collection of short stories by the name of That Way Lies Camelot. Ranging from fantasy to sci-fi, everyone is sure to find something to love in these 15 tales from Mrs. Wurts.
Finally, if you feel you're ready to dive off the deep end in terms of prose, scope, and complexity: The Wars of Light and Shadow tackles many themes throughout its run, but the seed idea of the series is that history is written by the victor, and so strives to offer us an unbiased look at events and invites us to "determine the good and the evil" for ourselves from the very first page.
In addition, in this series what happens is of equal, if not lesser, importance to why it happens, what drives the characters and the factions, how do they think and what are their goals. Janny often says that WoLaS doesn't sprawl, rather, it deepens, and this is the crux of that statement: Instead of having a cast that expands exponentially with each new volume, spawning more and more sub-plots that need page time of their own and gunking up the works, with each subsequent volume we instead find out more about not only the manageable handful of characters and the various factions that drive the story, but also about the world itself and its history that completely recontextualize prior events. And it's this moving of the markers, over and over and over again as more and more facets are unveiled, that really gives the series its depth.
Moreover, the series is designed to be reread and reread, with the insight from future volumes adding tons of new dimensions with each read as you're able to see more and more between the lines and view what was hidden in plain sight all along. Moreover, it's designed to play with whatever preconceptions that you have going into the story and the assumptions about it that you'll make along the way only to completely flip everything you thought you knew on its head over and over again. This is also where, IMO, Janny's prose shines the brightest, as her word choice is very deliberate and precise, and it's only on a reread that you get to see just exactly how she hid everything in plain sight only for said preconceptions and assumptions to blind you to the details that were there all along.
It's a series that's definitely not for everyone, but if you are willing to engage with it on the level that it asks for then you are going to be in for one hell of a fantastic experience.
I could go on and on about this series, but I'll finish off with an explanation of the series structure: The series is subdivided into 5 story arcs, and each one has its own purpose and function: Arc 1 (Curse of the Mistwraith) sets the stage and introduces everything, Arc 2 (Ships of Merior + Warhost of Vastmark) not only deepens the characters but also escalates the main conflict of the series, with Arc 3 (Fugitive Prince through Stormed Fortress) expanding the scope of the series to "world view" and going really in depth with not only the characters but the various factions in play and what drives them, with Arc 4 (Initiate's Trial + Destiny's Conflict) giving us a deeper look into the ethereal mysteries of the planet Athera and sets up the pure climax of a finale that will be Arc 5 (the forthcoming Song of the Mysteries). Moreover, not only does each book feature the 1-2 extended climax punch that is characteristic of Janny's work, but each arc as well as the series as a whole has this characteristic as well, with the middle of the series (Peril's Gate) being the tipping point where the rest of the series just breaknecks faster and faster towards conclusion. And if the start of an arc seems to slow down, fear not, it's only gearing back in pace to lay down the necessary foundation needed for the finale of the arc the pack the punch that it needs; there's no sprawl here, and if you've read Janny's other works before this then you'd know to trust that everything she's doing is necessary in service of the story, world, and the characters.
The traditional start of the series is Curse of the Mistwraith, but you might have an easier introduction by reading the short story Child of Prophecy and/or the novella The Gallant beforehand, both can be safely read before starting the series proper and will shed light on what the politics in play are like as the series opens and a character that has a small but important part to play throughout the series, respectively.
There's also a few other short stories as well. The Decoy and Reins of Destiny can be safely read anytime after Curse of the Mistwraith, but hold off on reading The Sundering Star until after Warhost of Vastmark, and don't even think of touching Black Bargain until after you've finished Stormed Fortress. All six WoLaS short works can be purchased in ebook form on Janny Wurts' website.
Finally, she's also on here as a fellow redditor as u/JannyWurts, and always gives excellent book recommendations, with many of my recent favorite and often overlooked gems coming to my attention only because of a plug from her. If you're ever looking for a good rec and you see her chime in, know that it's always going to be a read worth your time if it's coming from her.

I , Nicole 25F, was the maid of honor in my best friend from college, Allison 24F wedding. Allison and Anthony 26M eloped fall 2022 . Last May, she announced to us that she would be getting married and having a ceremony. I was one of the few to know that she was already married. Her parents selected her venue and ended up with a date that was less than a year away. Anthony’s family was not consulted as his entire family would be out of state. Soon after I began assisting with connecting the bridesmaids, drove a few hours to see her and go dress shopping and picked out the bridesmaid dresses as she did not want to assist with that.
The wedding was going to be out of state for the majority of the wedding party. Fortunately for me, it was about an hour from my hometown so I could make more flexible arrangements. Originally she offered to pay for her and make up of the bridal party and shortly after changed her mind. For context, I was one of two bridesmaids of color, so having a make up artist and hairstylist that didn’t have us in their portfolios would’ve been a lose-lose situation. She also offered to pay for our hair if we went outside to get our hair done. Changing her mind didn’t really bother me as I was comfortable going to my stylist and I knew the cost wouldn’t be outrageous and I’m very good at doing my own make up.
Around the time room blocking was brought up( by me ), she was against it as Anthony would be able to see her the night before the wedding, not considering that she was also in her parents hometown and his family would be in town by then. We could’ve had separate lodging where it was the Bridal Party and the groomsmen. At no point in the process did she offer to pay for rooms for any of the wedding party so I moved on booked a room with the bridesmaid I was already friends with. I was aware I would have to get a rental because I would be driving around the state quite a bit. I was more aware of the transportation situation of the Bridal Party, as I was the only one asking them. Allison had mentioned previously that we would have transportation for the day of the ceremony. About six weeks out. I asked her if she could provide the details because I was doing the day of ceremony flyers for us. That is when she informed me that the venue sold the transportation and her mother said that it was a hard no on providing transportation for us and if we wanted transportation, we could pay for Lyft or Uber. I covered my own ass with a rental. I thought it was highly inconsiderate and a slap in the face.
Another issue was our Bachelorette Party . In June of last year, I took a survey of the entire Bridal Party’s budget and what they may be open to. Alison wanted us to take an extra day off and fly in even sooner to have the bachelorette party in the middle of the week. We thought it would be best for Thursday as the rehearsal would be Friday and the ceremony was Saturday. Just to provide more consideration for the wedding party’s jobs and time off. After we had a few brainstorming sessions, we decided our best bet would be an in-state resort with a private house. I asked Allison how she felt about strippers as it was something that the whole Bridal Party put on the table she said she would put a pin in that and let us know. She later let me know that Anthony said it was a hard no. I let her know that if she wanted it, she could have it, but that was the end of it. Fast-forward to the bachelorette she irresponsibly took an edible consuming cannabis for the first time in three years. Which was also against her Air Force orders. She was confident she would be OK so we weren’t going to stop her. At some point in the night, she says “I wish I had more of a wild night , but I’m having so much fun.“ of course another bridesmaid caught that too and I asked her what she meant by that. She was saying she wish she had more of a raunchy party but because Anthony said no she was OK with it. She also detailed how invasive private parties were to him, but I reiterated that had she said she wanted them we would have made sure things went smoothly. You never said that you wanted them. We spend a lot of money to pull this off. I let it roll off and went about my night. At some point in the night. She became ill. I asked her what she was feeling and was given the cold shoulder and told to get out. So I just knew that she probably was just too high. At some point in the night, one of the bridesmaids who did not have transportation was asked to take her to hospital. The night was over. The diagnosis ended up being that some of her vitamins were low.
Now we must jump to the next day. Due to my hair no longer being paid for I had to figure out when I would get it done. It was suggested to me that I pay for my hairstylist to drive an hour and miss her other appointments to do my hair the morning of the ceremony. Just my hair. As someone with thick, long hair I need hot running water, space for a blow dryer and space for all of the products she would use. That’s very unrealistic for right before the ceremony and I always kept Alison informed that the Friday would be when I would get my hair done and then I may be late to set up. Yes she wanted us to set up the venue not decorate. Because they did not pay for set up just the venue as a whole. I let her know that I was unsure how long my hair would take and I would have to go to my parents house to pick up the remainder of the items I needed for the ceremony and drop off the bachelorette items as I was leaving, the day after the ceremony. My hair appointment was at 11 and I was finished by 3:30. By then it was check in for my hotel room so I went straight there so I could change for the rehearsal. Briana had a two hour drive as she also had to work that day and we were sharing a room together so we met up checked in and changed for the rehearsal. When we walked in, we were both met with a cold shoulder from Allison’s family. To me it was clear she did not communicate our schedules to everyone. We helped where we could even though her mom told us we could leave. The other bridesmaids asked us if we could help her, though her mom told us there was nothing to do.
Prior to the morning of the ceremony, Brianna and I let Allison know that we were not at the bridal suite directly at 8:30 AM: 1.) Due to me making the schedule and knowing exactly what time the bridesmaids will start getting ready.
2.) Being that we would be doing our own hair and make up. We would be sitting for a while before it was time for us to start that.
3.) Briana would have to do her own hair at the hotel and we would need to check out because we weren’t staying the night of the ceremony. Given all this information. We would get ourselves together and be prepared to get ready in the bridal suite and aimed to be there by 9:30. We communicated this to Allison several times. Wednesday prior to the ceremony she informed the Bridal Party that there were only two vanities so that we need a handheld mirror if we wanted to do our hair and make up ourselves. That would be difficult so we reconfirmed what we had already told her and let her know we would be a little behind. Her only comment was “oh I wanted us all to be there at the same time” Neither of us responded because we had already told her no. At the end of rehearsal, she starts yelling “8:30”. We let it roll off and she also mentions that she told “someone” that we needed to have a bra and shorts for the morning. I am not a forgetful person, so I let her know you never told me that and then she corrected herself and said “oh I thought I did but I forgot, maybe you all can run and get bras and shorts”.
That night before the ceremony, Briana and I reminded Allison again that we would not be there right at 8:30 but we will be there early. She didn’t reply until roughly 7:00 am saying that she said, we could get ready in the bridal suite once again. Brianna wears her hair natural so she would still have to prep her hair at the hotel no matter what and that was all we were telling her. Due to the room being in my name I couldn’t leave until Brianna was ready. I wouldn’t be saying anything about it because we said several no times. Not too long after she called me to ask if we were ready yet, I said no Briana is still in the shower. I’m finishing up my last things and then we should be ready to go. She starts complaining about her telling us to be there and I remind her that we already told her. I let her know that, I know what time I need to be there and everything will be OK. I hung up and then she texted me a nasty paragraph.
Maybe I’m just tripping or something so please correct me if I’m wrong but the laugh at the end was unnecessary for me and idk if it was attitude or what but I really really don’t need this today at all really I wanted to do something nice for everyone which meant being here before the makeup and hair but it’s probably not going to happen now and it’s making me feel some type of way
I do not reply because the gift was a SHEIN necklace and one of those Amazon kits of robes and slippers. She did not put effort into finding us gifts or doing anything nice for us. Even down to how she asked me to be her maid of honor it was just a “will you be my maid of honor” call. These gifts were just an Instagram moment to her. Which was the focus of a lot of her behavior, Instagram and TikTok and no, she’s not an influencer . Of course this change my attitude and had me behind with getting ready. I let Brianna know what was said, and was ready to drop out. Once I finally get myself together, she ends up calling Brianna, letting her know that Bridal Party had forgotten cash, that I had informed them that they needed a few days prior. Allison also let her know that she needed film for her camera. At that point I was over it we checked out. I messaged in the group chat and let them know I would run and get the film. Brianna would go get the cash since they were in opposite directions. I show up I said hello to everyone. I give her her the film. She does not say thank you and I go on my merry way that day. Somehow they forget to do Anthony’s mother’s hair and she was first on the list. They try to brush it off. It’s not a big deal but only the black girls are the ones that assist her with getting ready. My feelings hurt because that was a very careless action.
I started to feel that I no longer belonged in this friendship. I observed how Allison interacted with the other friends and how I interact with my other friends. It was clear that we have grown apart. The rest of the day went pretty smooth. I did my toast and moved on. I must also add that my parents were invited. My dad is a barber, but he is appointment only and he’s strictly his own clients. He does not take new clients. In September Allison asked if he’d be willing to do Anthony’s hair the morning of the ceremony, my dad no. Not out of disrespect but because that’s a lot of pressure for a one time cut and you need to be familiar with someone’s head for special occasions. I thought that was the end of it. Ten days prior to the ceremony she called me and asked if my dad could cut his hair once again. I let her know that his answer probably wouldn’t change. It did not change, so I sent her a few people that I knew of, but I knew she knew of more as she was very known at our school. During the reception she walked up to the table my parents were at and said hello to two guys who went to college with us. My parents later informed me that she did not say hello to them. I know it’s not always possible to talk to everyone, but I was disgusted at the fact that she did not pan out to see who else was at the table whether it had been my parents or not. She did not speak to them until my mom embraced by her after the cake cutting. Anthony was only a few feet away and she did not introduce them. I had to do that as well, after Allison noticed that she introduced his mom to my mom. At that point I was ready to go and I left after the tossing of MY bouquet. I said my goodbyes, and left early because I had to turn my rental in the morning and head to the airport.
I decided I’m going to write a letter detailing my experience and how I felt that she was very ungrateful. She did not think any of the wedding party during her toast. She was an uninvolved bride. If it wasn’t for me a lot of things would’ve slipped through the cracks. A lot of my friends said I should have dropped out and considered that she may not put this much effort into my special day. As there have been many instances , where she made my events about her or tried to get me to make adjustments specifically for her not considering my other counterparts or myself. I decided I will wait until I’ve gotten the professional pictures because I did a damn good job on my make up. I don’t know when I’ll physically see her again, but in every disagreement we’ve had, she has purposely misunderstood me or tried to minimize things that hurt my feelings. I am at point in this friendship where I don’t care about the conversation or resolve. I just want her to know that she has hurt me for the last time. I will send this after things have settled with the gifts and honeymoon. So AITA for breaking up with her?