Pillow humping

I am 3 WPO tomorrow. TT MR Lipo flanks and full back and mons reduction.
I am wearing a vest for upper back compression and a binder for mid section compression. I started back to work last week, was sitting in recliner with legs up and a pillow on my lap with laptop on it. Today I have been sitting at my desk and getting up every hour or two to walk around.
I have this hump on my mid back where the compression garment is creasing. This is not there when i'm just wearing compression and walking around, etc. Happens when I have to sit for extended periods of time. Sorry for the low res photos. Any suggestions on how to prevent this?
I'm also short 5'1 and short waisted so the 12 inch binder comes all the way up to my bust line and extend to my hips. So I am thinking it is getting pushed up/ bunched bc it's at my hips.
Debating on ordering a 9 inch binder so it doesn't bunch/bend at my hips. Think that would help?
I go for my next post op on June 13th where I will be moved to a stage 2 garment. Not sure what that will be.

TLDR; schools over in 2 weeks and im bumed about missed opportunities.
Im 16. In Wales thats the age when you leave school and go to higher education or get a job. Its when “the real world” starts. This post isn’t t gonna be some cringy whiney pity party, just a lil vent about life which I’m sure many of you will relate to if you’re re also leaving school.
Ive always been quite social, when I was in primary id always be out with my friends, doing whatever it is that we did. And when I wasnt, I was on the sofa watching DanTDM or PopularMMOS until bed. That was good. But then in year 5 I moved schools to a private school in Cardiff. It was a ways away from me so I wasnt able to go outside and hang out with my school friends. I basically stopped hanging out with my friends in my old school, I was basically alone. I started to recluse. Being inside constantly. There werent many kids in my area. While I said I hung out with primary school friends, my parents were protective. All my friends lived across several streets and passed two main roads, on the other side of my school. So when I no longer when to my primary, my parents saw no point in me making that perilous venture. So no friends within walking distance, result? Home and school 24/7
Through this time is was constantly bored and constantly on my Ipad. I was an Ipad kid, born in 07. I missed alot of family time. Always bratted or tried to get out of it which caused alot of stress for my parents which they regularly reminded me of through shouting matches. Not their fault, they are lovely people, I was just a handful. Apparently I was tested for autism/ADHD to which I dont have. I have very low level traits of it so I had the issues of it but not enough to be diagnosed. But enough of that. My point is I was lonely and “the problem child”. Lets hump to year 7, 2019/2020, a completely normal and uneventful year.
As you can imagine, going from only seeing my friends at school to always being home with noone besides my mum, dad and sister. Drove me insane, as you can imagine. Got basically zero work done during lockdown year 7. So I was behind in my education, incredibly anti social, and for year 8 I moved schools yet again. When everyone was wearing masks. Yeah…
Lets start this of by saying that at least I moved house too, so I COULD hang out with my friends. Great! Oh wait, even though half the people who go to my school live in the same village as me, the only friends I make are on the other side of a 40 minute walk. Fuck. But no matter, I go in, chin up, first day of school and talk to absolutely noone. Break? Surely Ill meat ONE person there. Nope. So im all alone for the first 2 weeks. To be fair I was sitting on the ground with a note book writing down some fantasy book ideas. I wanted to be an author lol. I gradually make more friends but as you can imagine, multiple years with little to no human contact doesn’t nst exactly make me the life of the party. So im stuck with the weird kids. I was one too so I fit right in. Wrong. I make two friends that I stick with till the end, the rest were pricks and/or had nothing in common with me. But I make it through. Onto year 9!
I move sets so im not with my friends anymore. But no with masks and a touch more confidence I make a few more friends. And… a girlfriend! Lets call her Grace. It wasnt the most romantic affair but it was my first and only real girlfriend. Im gonna be honest, we didnt like eachother, we were horny teens. All we really did was make out and she let me touch her tits. Embarrassing I know. We would walk around town late at night with my hand down her shirt. Then after a month she went around saying I hit her. I didn’t. Immediately all my friends ostracised me for about a week and a half. I was all alone wandering around school. My friend realise their mistake and welcome me back with open arms and apologies. All was well… for about 2 days. Grace starts going out with one of my friends, not bad you think but wait, the girl changed her story from I had hit her to I had RAPED her. Instantly lost all my friends again. Yap yap yap explanations ons to my friends and were back to normal, except shes still hanging around, and my “friend” aruges and play “macho man” infront of her and my friends. This escalates for a month before we NEARLY fight, come to find out shes been lying to him deliberately so hell fight me. I wasnt scared I was bigger than the guy and wouldve rocked him but at the time I feared that one his stronger friends wouldve jumped in and jumped me so I didnt necessarily back down, I just gave him what he gave me, not escalating so eventually he got over it and left the bitch. Unfortunately, a rumour spread that I had had anal sex with her. Leading to the nickname “shit-dick” lovely. Honestly it bothered me for a few months but eventually I got accustomed. My mates still call me that now, in a friendly way instead of in a bullying fashion.
The, still in year 9, a different girl joins our friend group! …Because she was dating my friend. Starting to see a pattern? Lets call her Roxie. They do the whole cringy school relationship thing where theyre cuddling all the time, basically inseparable. Its whatever. Hes happy and it wont last. But slowly he starts getting more irritated with me in particular. This was because at the time we would make fun of eachothers girlfriends in a friendly way. But Roxie didnt like that. So, effectively it was a will smith/chris rock situation. He didnt slap me, just kicked me out of the friend group. After a while they break up and I come back in. He apologies, we’re homies again. But wait! Less than a week later that very same girl is going out with another one if my friends. Rinse and repeat. The girl gets my mate to kick me out of the group. But this time, after a few days I come back and its Roxie and my friend that are forced to leave the friend group. Guess what? They break up and she goes out with someone else, not my friend this time so idc. Grace and Roxie had a habit it of going through boyfriends. Nothing important just wanted to mention it.
Now. Skip to year 10. A few friends start disappearing and hanging around with other people. It happens. But I do make one or two extras. But then, Roxies back, your favourite character! This time shes changed up her tactics she got with my friend over the half term so we had no idea about this. When we got back, my friend, David, stopped hanging out with me. Instead he opted to spending half of year 10 break times in a classroom with Roxie and some new friends. So we lot him until half way through year 11. But ill come back to that. I still didnt go out that much after school. I did army cadets and a drama club unrelated to my school for a few months before dropping one after the other. Army cadets hurt the most looking back on it. I had done everything, gone almost everyday so I could do the one thing I had been waiting for, shooting a gun! A fake one obviously, its was target practise with BBs. But around this time I was in a deeper swing of my porn/masterbation addiction. So instead of getting ready to progress to the next level of the cadets, I message my dad saying I feel sick, go to the shower and jack off. Not my proudest moment. I was fucking pissed with myself for weeks. The thing is, the next time theyd be doing the shoot it would be in a year, so Id have to go a whole year with some irritating kids who were 9/12, I was 15, so me and my parents decided it wasn’t worth it. So that was that.
Back to my friend, he stopped hanging out with us entirely besides lessons which he was forced to be in. Idk the entire story but apparently she cheated on Him multiple times and manipulated him. I should feel sympathetic but I really dont. We all tried to warn him but he didnt listen. So im down a few more friends and the rest of the year was basically a slog to finish my exams and get out of the school. I did get more popular in the later half of the year, cracked some jokes, was cool with almost everyone in my class and alot in my year. Which you would think would be good right? But it kinda got me sad that its only happening now at basically the end of school. It got me thinking about all that I missed over the years coz I was kinda weird.
The last day: you know the day where eveyone signs eachothers shirts and you have an assembly with an ice cream van and a photo booth and all that stuff. It came up out of nowhere honestly. But it was fantastic! Talked to my friends, chatted with some girls, laughed, joked. By days end my white shirt was more colourful than the pride flag. Covered in names, cocks and swasticas cleverly disguised as windows. Got my picture taken a few times and then… I went home, and it was all over. I still had my exams and prom but school, mandatory 6 hour a day school was done. And it hit me, im probably never gonna see anyone here again. I mean different colleges doesnt help. So basically, play times over. I didnt try hard enough and im gonna get average grades. Ill get to college sure but barely. Ive been feeling kinda down as of late but I actually spent time with my family, which is very rare. If im not watching YouTube, wanking or playing with my online friend Kittycore101 on apex legends instead if revising or socialising.
Kittycore101 is great btw, we’ve been friends since 2019 when apex came out. Anyway;
When I go to bed, I like to cuddle a pillow or blanket and pretend its someone. Im not lonely by any means its just, lack of female touch specially, coupled with my porn addiction kinda gets me fantasising about cuddling with a cute girl. Im sure every man can relate to this feeling. Also not getting compliments often. The last REAL compliment I got that wasnt from my family or an online friend when in year 9, the girl i was working with in drama said I had perfect teeth. I was grinning ear to ear for a week after that lol. Lets bring it up to the present
Today, It was bright and sunny. I mowed the lawn, “fuck, battery died” and went out to get icecream. Walked down a path ive walked many times but this time… it felt different. It was warm, I was talking with my family, it looked like a painting. Beaming sun, bright green grass, a quiet river, a viaduct built over 1000 years ago, mwah! Chef’s kiss! Have icecream, come home, sit in the warm sun for an hour. Then I go to my room, get horny watch porn for a bit, go to the shower. Start wacking it… at mid day. Dad knocks on the door. “Wanna come to the beer garden with us?” I turn the water off and sit there, silently jerking it, “nah im good”, “oh…”. Fucking killed me. My dads “oh” sounded so defeated yet like he expected it. Then he goes and I finish up and it hits me. I chose to masterbate instead if spending time with my family. And I remembered all the times ive done this before, must be in the 500s at this point. All that time I missed just for some quick pleasure. So I clean my room up, delete reddit from my phone and… no I dont, I lay in bed watching youtube and browsing reddit. From 6 till 11, you think I learned from my mistake? Nope. I put on some audio porn and look and anime tits and nut in some crusty pants. Then and only then does it actually Hit me. I just lay their in silence and disgust with myself. Then It turns to me putting my air pods in, listening to nostalgic minecraft music while holding back tears and rethinking life. I get up, get dressed at 23:40, go outside and sit down for about an hour, thinking about life. Then I start writing this post and currently its 2:04 am, im back in my bed coz I was cold and I have a maths GCSE exam tomorrow. fml
So yeah. Thats my life story. Heavily abridged and when I wake up in the morning Ill think of all that I missed and try to get through my exam. I dont want any pity, I just wanna know if im alone, maybe some of you will be in a vaguely similar situation to me. Good luck with everything yall

Hello it’s me again. I’m really getting hopeless. I literally cry everyday because I don’t want to live life like this. Everyday it’s something different. Lately my ears have been ringing constantly and it’s driving me insane. I try not to pay attention to it but it’s hard. Also my ears have been super clogged and they feel full and it’s also driving me insane because I don’t like the feeling nor do I wanna lose my hearing. I got sick a month ago, I got a bacterial infection that really messed me up, like I got super congested then I got pink eye and I had a lot of phlegm. Idk if that’s why my ears feel clogged or if it’s because of tmj or because of both?? I don’t necessarily have pain anymore because I used to get a lot of headaches and I think going to the chiropractor and acupuncture has helped (I barely started going lol) but it’s more like my jaw and neck feel super tense and it’s annoying. I’m constantly thinking about tmj everyday and always checking in on myself to see how I feel and I feel like that’s not good for my mental health. I’m trying turmeric curcumin to see if it helps with inflammation but I just started so I’ll probably see results in about 4-8 weeks. I just bought magnesium glycinate just now so I hope that helps with relaxing my muscles. I’m a bit hopeless because I see how some of these things don’t help people and I lose hope because I don’t want to continue living like this. I know everybody is different so I really hope these things help me. I’m gonna go see my ent again to see if maybe I suffer from ETD but she has told me twice already that she suspects i suffer from tmj. She has referred me to a tmj specialist (oro facial pain clinic) but I’m scared how much a consultation will cost) any things or advice you guys can give me to not lose hope and to try to manage this?? Like what kind of pillow should I be using?? I have a lot of congestion and I want to buy a wedge pillow to see if that helps idk. What do you guys think? :/ also I do have a neck hump idk if it’s because of my posture and I believe I also have rounded shoulders so idk if that’s also contributing to my tmj. Should I try physical therapy? I don’t feel like there’s any tmj therapists in my area so idk what to do

"I worked really hard to be mediocre. But I studied. When I lay my head on my pillow, I’m very satisfied, not so much with my record or my numbers, but I know I gave it everything I had every day." -- Dave Eiland

Who is the only player in major league history to give up a home run to the first batter he faced, and to hit a home run against the first pitcher he faced? It's not Babe Ruth, it's not Shohei Ohtani, it's not even Roy Hobbs. It's Dave Eiland!
David William Eiland was born July 5, 1966, in Dade City, Florida. He was an all-conference football and baseball at Zephyrhills High School and then attended the University of Florida on a scholarship to play baseball and football, but an injury his freshman year ended his NFL dreams and he focused on baseball. He then transferred to the University of South Florida, where he was an All-Sun Belt Conference player and a preseason All-American in 1987. He also played for the Falmouth Commodores of the Cape Cod Baseball League.
The Yankees drafted Eiland in the 7th round, #185 overall, of the 1987 draft. He rose quickly through the Yankee system, jumping from Low-A to A-ball in his debut season of 1987; he went a combined 9-3 with a 1.87 ERA and 0.960 WHIP in 91.2 innings.
The following year he started in Double-A, where he was an Eastern League All-Star after going 9-5 with a 2.56 ERA and 0.980 WHIP in 119.1 innings, and was promoted to Triple-A Columbus, where he made just one start before getting the call: The soon-to-be 37-year-old Ron Guidry pulled his hamstring and was going on the Disabled List. Eiland was called up to take his place in the rotation.
Eiland's debut on August 3, 1988, was against the Brewers in Milwaukee, and the first batter he faced was future Hall of Famer Paul Molitor. The third baseman welcomed the 22-year-old rookie to the Show by cranking a 1-2 slider to deep left-center for a home run.

"It was the first batter. It only counts for one run." -- Dave Eiland

Eiland settled down after that, allowing just two more hits and two walks in seven innings. But then Eiland's leg started cramping up -- in the sixth, manager Lou Piniella and trainer Gene Monahan went to the mound to check on him -- and he was pulled after the seventh inning. Closer Dave Righetti came in to get the final six outs in a game the Yankees were winning 5-1, and he was bombed for five runs on five hits while retiring just one batter, and the Yankees lost, 6-5.
Eiland made two more starts that year, but he lasted a total of just 5.2 innings while surrendering eight runs on 12 hits, two walks, and two hit batters. The big problem, as demonstrated by the very first batter he faced in the majors, was the long ball -- Eiland gave up five in those 5.2 innings!
The Yankees sent Eiland back down to Columbus after his start on August 17, and he spent the rest of the season down there. The following year he started in Triple-A again. The Yankees called him up in June and again he looked pretty good in his first start, holding the Texas Rangers to three runs over seven innings and getting his first major league win. But over the rest of the season he went 0-3 in five starts, with a 6.26 ERA and 1.683 WHIP in 27.1 innings (and giving up five home runs). Once again he rode the "Columbus Shuttle" and he spent the rest of the season in the minors, and began the 1990 season down there as well.
Eiland -- still just 23 years old -- dominated in Columbus that season, going 16-5 with a 2.87 ERA and 1.067 WHIP. He was named the International League Pitcher of the Year, and the Yankees made him a September call-up. He finally looked good enough in pinstripes -- 2-1, 3.56 ERA, 1.187 WHIP in 30.1 innings -- that he looked like he'd stick the next season.
He opened 1991 in the rotation, joining previously forgotten Yankee Tim Leary, Scott Sanderson, Chuck Cary, and Andy Hawkins... yikes. It was not a fun time to be a Yankee fan.
Eiland went 1-3 with a 4.75 ERA in nine starts before hurting his heel in May and going on the Disabled List. He came back in August, got two more starts -- giving up 11 runs in 8.2 innings -- and was put in the bullpen. (Eiland later said he came back before he'd fully recovered because he wanted to help the team.) He was given two starts at the end of the year, and looked pretty good -- in 12.0 innings, he gave up just three runs on nine hits and a walk.
But that winter, the Yankees made a series of roster moves, signing free agents Danny Tartabull and previously forgotten Yankees Mike Gallego and Mike Stanley; trading Steve Sax to the White Sox for Melido Perez, previously forgotten Yankee Bob Wickman, and Domingo Jean; and acquiring Charlie Hayes from the Phillies for Darrin Chapin. They needed to clear a spot on the 40-man roster. Eiland was designated for assignment, and he didn't like it.

"As far as I'm concerned, it was a stupid move on the part of the Yankees and I'm looking forward to leaving. I've done a lot more for them than some of the people they have kept. I guess I didn't fit into their plans. It doesn't make sense." -- Dave Eiland

He was promptly signed by the Padres, who put him at the end of their rotation for the upcoming 1992 season.
Eiland started the fifth game of the year against the Los Angeles Dodgers in San Diego. He allowed an RBI double to future Yankee Darryl Strawberry in the 1st inning, but future Yankee Gary Sheffield tied it up with an RBI triple in the bottom of the 1st. Eiland retired the side in order in the top of the 2nd.
In the bottom of the 2nd, a walk followed by two outs brought up Eiland with a man on second base. He was facing yet another future Yankee, Bob Ojeda, and drilled a 2-2 pitch to left-center for a two-run home run!
As Eiland had been in the American League his first four seasons -- no interleague play then -- he'd never come up as a batter before. And so he became the first player to allow a home run to the first batter he faced, and to hit a home run against the first pitcher he faced. It would be the only home run of his career.

"It was a fluke. I wish people would talk about my pitching instead of my hitting." -- Dave Eiland

Eiland pitched two seasons in San Diego, going 0-5 with a 5.38 ERA in 16 starts and one relief appearance. They released him the following May, and he signed with the Cleveland Indians. They sent him to Triple-A, where he made eight starts with the Charlotte Knights (1-3, 5.30 ERA) before being traded to the Texas Rangers, who kept him in Triple-A for the rest of the season (3-1, 4.54 ERA). A free agent after the season, he signed with the Yankees during spring training in 1994 and spent the next two seasons back in Columbus, going 9-6 with a 3.58 ERA in 1994 and 8-7 with a 3.14 ERA in 1995. The Yankees called him up on July 21 and he made one start and three relief appearances, going 1-1 with a 6.30 ERA in 10.0 innings.
He signed a minor league deal with the Cardinals for the 1996 season and pitched in eight games, going 0-1 with a 5.55 ERA in 24.1 innings, before getting released in June. Three days later he returned to the Yankees for a third stint, going 8-4 with a 2.92 ERA in Columbus in 15 starts. He was a September call-up for that magical 1996 season, but never got into a game.
Returning to the Yankees on a minor-league deal in 1997, the 30-year-old Eiland battled tendinitis and went 5-3 with a 6.42 ERA in 81.1 innings across three levels.
Eiland spent the next three years of his major league career in the Tampa Bay Devil Rays organization, splitting his time between the majors and minors as a swingman. He went 6-12 with a 6.54 ERA and 1.663 WHIP in 137.2 innings with the Devil Rays.
After the 2000 season, Eiland signed a minor league deal with the Oakland A's, but he tore his elbow and missed the entire season after getting Tommy John surgery. An attempted comeback in 2002 was ended when he retore the same ligament 51 weeks later. In those days, a second Tommy John surgery was thought to be a death sentence for a pitcher's elbow. Rather than attempting another comeback, he retired to become a pitching coach.
In interviews, Eiland -- with a career 12-27 record, with a 5.74 ERA and 1.563 WHIP -- said his major league struggles forced him to be a student of the game, and that would serve him well as a pitching coach.

“I didn’t have the God-given ability to get over the hump, so to speak. I kept getting chances because I did my work and I think that helps me in the coaching aspect. I work with guys now who have ability. I can teach them how to work, how to study film, how to read swings, how to attack guys.” -- Dave Eiland

He was a minor league pitching coach at various levels with the Yankees from 2003 to 2007, and was credited with helping the minor league development of the Yankees' trio of promising pitching prospects -- Phil Hughes, Joba Chamberlain, and Ian Kennedy.
After Joe Girardi replaced Joe Torre as Yankee manager in 2008, Eiland was named the team's pitching coach, a position he held for three seasons. He earned a ring as the pitching coach of the 2009 World Series champions.
Eiland's contract was not renewed after the 2010 season, with Brian Cashman giving the cryptic explanation: "He knows why. He was given conditions that needed to be followed. So he knows why." In June of that season, Eiland had taken a three-week leave of absence from the Yankees which was never explained beyond it being a family issue.
After the Yankees, Eiland worked in the Tampa Bay Rays' front office and then was a pitching coach for the Royals from 2012 to 2017 (winning a second World Series ring as a coach in 2015). He served as Mets pitching coach in 2018 and 2019, and Jacob deGrom, Zack Wheeler, and Steven Matz credited their improvement as pitchers to his guidance. In 2020 he managed the Eastern Reyes del Tigre in the independent Constellation Energy League. In 2021 he was a pitching coach in the independent Atlantic League, and in 2022 and 2023, a pitching coach for the Miami Marlins' Double-A team.
Eiland is now Head of Baseball for Grand Central Sports Management.
Eiland Living

• Dave Eiland's last name is pronounced EYE-land, and his Chris Berman nickname is Dave "No Man Is An" Eiland. It's from a 1624 poem by John Donne: "No man is an island, entire of itself; Every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main."
  
• Eiland was an extra in the 1999 movie For Love of the Game and was the "pitching double" for Kevin Costner. "Any time you saw the ball cross the plate, I probably threw that pitch," Eiland said in a February interview with breakingbatspod. "Even though he says he threw every pitch in that movie, I can tell ya, no he didn't." Eiland also was used as Costner's "body double" in long shots to feature an authentic MLB delivery. Eiland's IMDB page lists his role as "relief pitcher" -- he's the pitcher the Tigers manager briefly considers sending out to pitch the 9th inning.
  
• According to The Baseball Filmography by Hal Erickson, the Yankees and Tigers -- the two teams featured prominently in For Love of the Game -- required anyone in a uniform had to either be a professional actor (like Costner) or a former or active baseball player. In other words, no off-the-street extras in the dugout. As a result, several players were in the background, including Yankees Eiland, Donzell McDonald, Scott Pose, Mike Buddie, and previously forgotten Yankee Ricky Ledee.
  
• Dave's father, Bill Eiland, was chief of police in Zephyrhills from 1961 to 1996. Eiland Boulevard in Zephyrhills is named in Bill Eiland's honor.
  
• The 6'3" Eiland was a wide receiver and punter in high school, and Florida envisioned him as a tight end. But he bulked up so much that summer in the weight room that the Gators were going to switch him to fullback. A shoulder injury ended his collegiate football career before it ever began, however.
  
• The 1987 draft was a particularly bad one for the Yankees. We didn't have a 1st or 2nd round pick, and the next four players drafted -- Bill Dacosta, Doug Gogolewski, Red Morrison, and Pop Popplewell -- never made it out of the minors. And so Eiland, our 7th round pick, was the first player drafted by the Yankees in 1987 to reach the Show. In fact, of the 54 players drafted by the Yankees that year, only one other made it to the majors with the Yankees: Gerald "Ice" Williams, taken in the 14th round, 367th overall. Three others were drafted by the Yankees, but reached the majors with other organizations: Terry Bradshaw (17th round, 445th overall) -- no, not that one -- a high school player who didn't sign after the Yankees drafted him, instead going to Norfolk State University and getting drafted three years later by the Cardinals, and making his debut with them in 1995; James Mouton (42nd round, 1,057th overall), another high school player who didn't sign and went to Saint Mary's College of California, got drafted in 1991 by the Houston Astros, and made his debut with them in 1994; and Brad Ausmus (48th round, 1,152nd overall), who was taken by the Colorado Rockies in the 1992 expansion draft but traded to the Padres the following season, and he made his debut with them in 1993. The other 49 players drafted by the Yankees that year never reached the majors at all.
  
• If you get a time machine, tell the Yankees to use one of those wasted 1987 picks to take 1990s five-category roto god Reggie Sanders, taken by the Reds with the #180 pick. You might be tempted to tell them to take the high school pitcher the Orioles found in the 11th round (#273 overall), but Mike Mussina isn't going to sign -- he's going to Stanford University. The Orioles drafted him again three years later, this time in the 1st round.
  
• Eiland said early in his career he was a two-pitch pitcher, relying on his fastball and slider, but later learned to use a changeup and curveball to tantalize batters with pitches that sometimes didn't break 70 mph.
  
• Eiland wore four numbers with the Yankees: #52, #28, #58, and #47. With the Padres, he wore #45; with Tampa Bay, #48.
  
• No one has worn #52 since C.C. Sabathia, who had it from 2009 to 2019. Prior to him, players who wore it more than one season include Jose Contreras (2003-2004), David Weathers (1996-1997), Mark Hutton (1994-1996), Doyle Alexander (1976, 1982-1983); Mike Griffin (1979-1981); and Joe Verbanic (1967-1970).
  
• #28, which Eiland wore from 1989 to 1991, is currently worn by Austin Wells; prior to that, it was worn by Josh Donaldson (2022-2023) and Corey Kluber (2021). Others who wore it three or more seasons: Melky Cabrera (2006-2008), Chad Curtis (1997-1999), Scott Kamieniecki (1993-1996), Bob Watson (1980-1982), Sparky Lyle (1972-1978), Bud Daley (1961-1964), Art Ditmar (1957-1961), Tom Morgan (1951-1956), Tommy Byrne (1946-1951), Atley Donald (1938-1945), and previously forgotten Yankee Myril Hoag (1931-1936).
  
• Eiland wore #58 in 1990, which was worn from 2021 to 2023 by Wandy Peralta. Other long-time wearers of #58 were Jeff Karstens (2006-2007), Colter Bean (2005-2006), Randy Choate (2000-2001), Juan Espino (1982-1986), and previously forgotten Yankee Dooley Womack (1966-1968).
  
• And finally, Eiland wore #47 during his second stint with the Yankees in 1995. It's currently worn by Victor Gonzalez, and the two seasons before that by Frankie Montas. Others who wore it at least three seasons: Jordan Montgomery (2017-2022), Ivan Nova (2010-2016), Darrell Rasner (2006-2008), Shane Spencer (1998-2002), Fred Beene (1972-1974), Luis Arroyo (1960-1963), and previously forgotten Yankee Tom Sturdivant (1955-1959).
  
• When he was named Yankees pitching coach in 2008, Eiland was coaching ex-teammates including pitchers Andy Pettitte and Mariano Rivera, as well as catcher Jorge Posada. That helped establish a certain level of trust, Eiland said, "but it’s not like they’re going to stand around and say, 'Remember when we all played together?'"
  
• Eiland told Baseball America in 2019 that what made Mariano so good was he was always trying to improve. "He would always ask me, 'What did you see, was it good?' He always wanted information. He was humble. He never thought he had it all figured out and was always positive."
  
• Eiland said long-time Yankee pitching guru Billy Connors was a big influence on him. The advice he most took to heart: "Keep it simple." In a 2021 article in the New York Post, Eiland said he gave that advice to Jacob deGrom, helping him improve from a good pitcher (45-32, .584 W%, 2.98 ERA, 1.122 WHIP before Eiland was hired prior to the 2018 season) to a great one (39-25, .609 W%, 2.08 ERA, 0.863 WHIP after).
  
• On September 8, 2008, the Yankees lost 12-1 to the Los Angeles Angels, with a bench-clearing brawl in the sixth inning. The brouhaha started when L.A.'s Torii Hunter shoved Yankee catcher Ivan Rodriguez -- remember he was a Yankee? -- after a play at the plate. Pudge then threw a punch at Hunter and the benches cleared. Eiland was in the middle of the fracas and appeared to get hit in the face. After the game, the 42-year-old pitching coach passed out in the dugout and the Yankee players helped carry him to the clubhouse, where he was examined by a doctor. "He's been fighting a cold and he worked out hard this morning," manager Joe Girardi said. "I think the last time he ate was 1 o'clock. He took some medicine during the game and got lightheaded and dizzy and passed out. But he's OK now. I just told him to eat."
  
• In 1999, the Tampa Bay Times reported Eiland was the Columbus Clippers all-time leader in wins (67), innings (767), and strikeouts (437). Overall, in 13 seasons in Triple-A, he was 89-49 with a 3.61 ERA and 1.211 WHIP. In 2012, he was inducted into the International League Hall of Fame.
  
• Eiland's wife is Sandra and they have two daughters, Nicole and Natalie.
  

"It's about perseverance. Hard work pays off. Maybe not right away, maybe not overnight. But eventually, it does." -- Dave Eiland

Ten seasons in the Show means a lot to ballplayers. Ten seasons means you're fully vested in the pension plan. It also means you are eligible to appear on the Hall of Fame ballot (though the Baseball Writers' Association of America doesn't have to put you on the ballot, and they didn't put Eiland on it). Dave Eiland, a pitcher who described himself as someone who "worked really hard to be mediocre," worked hard enough to last 10 seasons in the majors, and that's pretty impressive.
He's also the answer to a cool trivia question and was in a pretty good baseball movie.
Definitely a Yankee worth remembering!

hello, I am 25 years old and I have been pillow humping ever since childhood. this is the only way I can feel good. I've tried to do other ways to masturbate but nothing even feels good. I even bought a masturbation device, but it doesn't satisfy me. I hump my pillow 1 to 6 times a day. depends on how I feel. My problem is also I always watch porn when I hump my pillow. I am obsessed with it, but after I orgasm, I feel bad but I still do it couple times a day. Is that normal to hump your pillow so much and is it normal that you can't feel good trying other masturbation techniques. ?

It’s been some time before I had gotten a chance to go back home. I went to Canada for my university and am currently looking for work. The economy was down the shitter, my friends from uni all dispersed into their own adult lives and I was stuck alone in my apartment staring at a dwindling list of relevant job offers online.
I’d started staying up later and later, where the first sunlight was usually also the last natural light I would see before crashing on my couch. I was at my limit, not enjoying much of anything, and all my senses feeling numb. I was just pushing on through to the next day.
I’d decided to save up some money to return back to my family for a short while, just a few weeks to decompress and see if that would help me.
I come from one of the smaller cities in mid-western Germany. There’s absolutely nothing notable about it other than being located near the forest where my ancestors fought back the Romans. But the people are nice, as far as Germans go. We are a weird people, I admit. Outwardly cold towards those we don’t know, until we get together for a few beers or a piece of cake, after which you would think we were friends our entire lives.
But that’s exactly what I wanted then. If I managed to get out of my hole to grab a coffee, those trained smiles just reminded me of how miserable I was. I needed the gruffness of my Fatherland and the reality of my own family.
My arrival and the first few days went about as well as I’d anticipated. I was greeted with hugs and kisses and had to tell the same stories about a hundred times before crashing on my old bed. Even at home, I barely managed to get outside. I’d stay up, smoke and drink on the balcony before letting sleep carry me through the day. My family was understandably worried. I hadn’t really told them the extent of how shitty I had been feeling.
They tried their best, considering they didn’t really know how to deal with my mental status. It wasn’t their fault, their words weren’t reaching me. At least, they managed to figure out pretty quickly to drop the subject for now, attempting instead to simply cheer me up by being themselves and acting as if everything was normal. It worked for me, even if it wasn’t quite the reality check I needed. I even managed to get up early enough to see them at breakfast. I still remember the soft smiles they gave me when they saw me. I shrugged, sat down, and ate some eggs.
One day, an old high school friend, Max, who had also managed to make his way back home and had heard of my arrival, hit me up via text and asked if I wanted to go on a walk. I wanted to decline but at the same time, I felt bad enough that I had never once texted him and now here he was, inviting me.
We used to live close together, so all he needed to do was pick me up at home. We decided to retread our old childhood stomping grounds in the forest that bordered our suburb. It’s the same forest I mentioned earlier, by the way.
As he rang the doorbell, I was overcome by this terrible anxiety. How would he see me? What would he think of me?
I opened the door and he immediately smiled and said, “How are you, you fucking ghost?”
I couldn’t help but grin and we hugged.
“Could be better, bro. You know how it is,” I replied.
“Ain’t that the truth,” he chuckled and beckoned me outside. (I will be paraphrasing some of what was said as I’m translating it. Otherwise, I would just sound off.)
As we hiked through the down-trodden dirt paths, through the luscious trees, bright green and alight with the sounds of birds chirping away, we barely said a word to each other. I guess he understood what I was going through, perhaps heard the bare minimum from whoever told him I was even here. At the time, I thought he pitied me and that’s why he came to pick me up.
We exchanged the odd question about what we were doing. For me, nothing. He was training to become a nurse, which honestly surprised me seeing as he always was more one for making jokes and sleeping in class rather than being passionate about helping people. But who was I to judge?
We decided to walk up the hill further into the woods. Unlike the miles and miles of dark green conifers you might be picturing from North America, this forest is more of a mixture of beeches, birches, and fir trees. Most areas are well-lit, as the sun has enough space to seep through. However, I’ve always felt it gives you a false sense of security. You think you can see everything but in the end, it is still you, alone in the woods, dismissing every shadow or sign of movement as leaves and branches when in reality you really have no idea what might be lurking behind those tree trunks. Another aspect is that while the paths seem to form a natural clearing, it is just as easy to get lost, mistaking a more flat patch on the ground for a man-made path, just because the leaves don’t obscure the sun, letting the forest swallow you up with ease.
I realized then that I’d never been aware of that until now. I’ve always seen the woods as our kingdom, as nature inviting us to be free and just be children.
“Something wrong?” Max asked.
“Forest seems different. Might just be me though.”
Max nodded and replied, “I get what you mean. Seems less friendly now that we’re older, doesn’t it.”
“Exactly.”
Max stopped for a second and frowned, before suggesting, “Listen. One thing is actually different. You remember the meadow, with the river and the bridge?”
“Sure.”
“You recall that concrete bunker that was next to it. We always just thought it was something to do with the power grid.”
I did remember it. I remembered the way it stood out as an ugly minimalist block, threatening the serenity of nature. The graffiti didn’t help. We would usually stay away, not minding it.
I nodded.
“Well, that one is gone…but…uh…there’s another one. Popped up a while ago, don’t know when exactly. Lisa’s Aunt noticed it while walking her dog. Wanna check it out?”
I raised my eyebrow, “Why would we wanna do that?”
“I don’t know man. I’m trying my best here.” I could sense his desperation, reminding me of my parents, seeing me every night before they went to bed, asking me to hang out with them.
I shrugged, grabbed his shoulders, and said, “Lead the way then.”
He gave me a weak smile and we walked on.
Indeed, the structure was, in terms of how it was built, identical to the one we saw as kids. We walked around it, checking every angle. There really was nothing remarkable about it but something was finally stirring inside my cold heart. A sense of adventure, something new and unexpected to be discovered. I didn’t know how long it would last but I wanted to cling onto it and keep it inside me for as long as I could.
We found a door on one side, reading “No Authorized Access”.
Max poked me and asked, “Is it just me or does this door look different from the old one?”
It did. “There’s a handle on this one and…no lock. The old one just had a keyhole. I suppose it was so It was harder to open from the outside.”
I looked around, trying to get a better lay of the land, “Have you noticed something else?”
Max tried to follow my eyes, “What?”
“There are no powerlines or towers. The old one had those too.”
“Maybe it’s underground. Save the trees and all of that.”
“Maybe..,” I responded.
Max took another walk around the box, shouting from the other side, “Nobody has tagged it yet, either!”
“Can’t be that old then…Come back and give me a lift!”
Max helped me onto the roof. There was nothing, not even an HVAC box.
“Bro, what do you see!”
“Nothing, Max. Not a thing.”
I jumped back down and looked at my friend. We both started to grin. This little detour had just turned into a bonafide mystery.
“I guess there’s only one thing to do now,” I said, looking at the door handle.
“I guess you’re right.”
We both didn’t move a muscle, exchanging glances.
Max took a step back, holding his hands up: “Why don’t you go ahead.”
“Hmmm…Wimp.”
“Do it then, big guy.”
“Alright. Alright.” I slowly placed my hands on the handle, as if it may be electrified, and tried twisting it. Nothing happened.
I could feel Max deflate behind me but I wouldn’t give up. I tried it with some more force and noticed the door buckle. I wouldn’t stop now. I was feeling good. I kept pushing and pulling, using my foot against the wall for more force.
Finally, the door gave way and with it, I fell backward, crashing into leaves and dirt.
Max was equally shocked and amused, “Okay then, big guy. You go to the gym?”
“Not really. The door must’ve just rusted shut,” I said as I got back up and dusted myself off.
We both took a look inside but couldn’t see anything. But it was more than that. There was a thick wall of darkness, just past the precipice of the doorway. No light from the forest dared to enter it. Even the birds seemed frightened, enveloping both of us in absolute silence.
We tried to make anything out inside but we couldn’t. It was just black. I got out my phone and turned on the flashlight, shining it inside. It barely managed to penetrate, forcing me to get closer and closer. It felt a chill come from this portal I had just opened up.
“Nah, man. This ain’t right.” Max huffed behind me.
“Just give me a second.” I got as close to the opening as I was comfortable with and held my phone out. My fingers brushed past the boundary and it was running them under icy cold water. I shuddered but tried to steady my arm.
“I can make out a hallway. That’s it. I think it splits just a bit further in.” I told Max.
“Cool. Cool. You want to lead the way then?”
“You brought me here. Why don’t you go first? I opened the damn thing.”
“Exactly…finders keepers.”
“Aren’t nurses supposed to be able to be brave or something?”
“First of all, nurse-in-training. Second of all, you’re thinking of firefighters and thirdly, what the fuck do you mean brave? It’s like staring into the Marianna’s trench. This doesn’t seem natural.”
“I mean…It’s not. Somebody built it.”
“Yeah. That somebody clearly doesn’t want anybody to enter.”
I got agitated. He had brought me here, he agreed to open the door. Why did he want to ruin this for me? Isn’t this what he wanted? Isn’t this what everybody at home wants for me? To finally fucking act and not just waste away in my room?
“You can stand guard,” I replied gruffly.
Max put his hands in the air, took another look at me, and said, “You owe me a drink after this.,” before taking out his phone and turning the flashlight on.
I felt my anger vanish and we proceeded inside. We were definitely not dressed warm enough. As soon as both of us passed through the doorway, we took one last look at the forest behind us. There was nobody there to save us. We were alone. Maybe, I shouldn’t make Max do this. He was right. Something was very wrong here. I could feel my heartbeat fastening and my confidence replaced with fear.
Max took the first step forward and said, “At least the door won’t suddenly close on us.”
“I suppose so,” I replied following after him, hyping myself up. I wanted this. I needed this, I kept thinking to myself.
The first few meters were easy, as long as the light and escape were still clearly behind us. But we both felt it. There was a pressure here and the further we went in, the more it told us to leave.
We made it towards the end and indeed there was a split.
“Which way, boss?” Max asked.
I paused, shining my light in both directions. It looked to be more of the same.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” I asked Max.
Max gave me an agitated look and sighed, “You wanted this, right? And I don’t abandon my friends.”
His words stung. I looked at my feet in embarrassment. “I’m sorry, I didn’t text or call.”
I could make out his smile and he replied, slapping my back: “It’s alright, bro. I get it. Gotta make up for lost time now at least.”
“Yeah…,” I responded weakly.
“So which way?”
“No idea. Got a preference?”
“Well, the left is one shade of pitch black and the right is another shade…I’ll pick right. Always my favorite side.”
“Right, it is,” I proclaimed.
We walked on, leaving the safety of the front door only in our memories.
Slowly inching forward, our flashlights barely made a dent into the void. There was no glass, no doors, just concrete and the linoleum floor.
After a little while Max tapped on my back, “Hey, did you notice something?”
I stopped, “No. What’s up?”
“This whole box wasn’t more than a few meters wide, right?”
“I did take me like two or free steps to get around.”
“Well…,” he held his arms up.
“How long have we been walking in here?”
“Exactly. How the fuck is that possible?”
“It isn’t it…”
Not only did this structure come out of nowhere, it also had complete disregard for the laws of physics. First, the light, which we simply waved away but now this? I was beginning to wonder whether this was worth it, after all, torn between my need for excitement and a basic fear of the unknown.
As if to answer us, our flashlights made out an irregularity ahead of us. It was another door.
We made our way closer to the door and Max slowly tried out the handle. The door opened into more black nothingness, where this time our light managed to illuminate even less. Max took another step and suddenly he was gone.
I blinked for a second, only to hear him scream and hear his voice draw further and further away from me. Running towards the doorframe, I only caught a glimpse of a bright dot falling further and further into an abyss, we both had failed to see.
“MAAAAAX!? MAAAAX!” I called out to him several times but he was nowhere to be seen. Even his flashlight had been swallowed up
I continued shouting out his name but there was no response. I was suddenly very alone, very scared, and very much ashamed.
Max was down there because of me, because I craved adventure so much in my boring unfulfilled existence that I was willing to not only risk my life but his as well. We both looked inside this alien box and knew something was wrong, yet I decided to go in anyway. Even, if it wasn’t dangerous, it was likely still very illegal. I’ve destroyed public property, entered a sealed-off area, and made my friend an accessory to my crime. A friend who had just been swallowed up by what looked to be a night sky without stars, utterly devoid of life.
Then I heard it. It was a faint moan, barely audible but coming from below.
I peeked my head past the doorway, again shouting, “Max!? Are you there?!”
The only response was more moaning. I grabbed my phone and tried to find anything to guide me. It couldn’t just be a giant hole, could it? I nearly dropped my phone, the more desperately I tried to make something out.
There was a little overhang, just past the doorway. I got on all fours and crawled forward, shining my flashlight around me.
Max’s moans didn’t cease.
“Don’t worry, bro. I-I’m gonna come get you!” I didn’t really believe in the words I was saying.
That wasn’t until I noticed something in the overhang. Just to my left, it went down but when I looked closely, I saw that the drop was only a few centimeters. I slithered to my left and tried to follow the small drop. Indeed, just past the first one followed another similar decrease. Steps!
They were hard to make out, seeing as the floor was as black as its surroundings but the texture was different. They didn’t particularly leave a lot of room to actually stand on, explaining why Max had so easily stumbled past them into the opening. If I was careful enough, I could manage my way down.
So, I stood up and took my first few steps deeper into the void, my flashlight as my only companion. Every move felt like a gamble. Would I reach the next step, stumble, or completely lose my balance and fall into the hole? I made damn sure to hug the wall, clearly cruved. It must've been a circle and a massive one at that. While I couldn’t make out the door where I came from, I noticed quickly that it took a lot longer to traverse this staircase, than I’d imagined.
One more step and suddenly, I fell. I either missed a step or there was none. Everything looked the same, like nothing. I almost felt weightless, like drifting through the cosmos. There was no sound and almost no draft of air resisting my falling body. If not for my apparent ability to breathe and scream, you could be fooled into thinking this whole structure was housing a dark vacuum, ready to swallow any outside life into its empty space.
I screamed and screamed as I fell but the longer I dropped, the less energy I had to scream. Flailing around in desperation, I tried to reach around me in the hopes of grasping a ledge, even if it would rip my arms out of their sockets. No luck. I just kept falling down that impossibly deep hole.
All I kept thinking was, how could’ve Max survived the fall? Did I mistake his death screams echoing out as pained groans?
But I would soon get my answer.
Trying to think back to it, the fall must’ve taken about 5 minutes, more or less. That kind of distance in the real world would likely see you ending up as a pancake, but in this madhouse, a fall like that simply ended up with a broken phone and you lying on damp concrete, disoriented and sore from a somewhat rough landing. No doubt, my impact still hurt but I was alive. I tried to sit up. My head was pounding and I could feel the scrapes all over my body.
I stumbled around in the darkness, stumbling over what I felt to be my broken phone. Turning around was like turning in a corn maze.
“MAX! MAAAAX!” I shouted. If he was still alive, he must be able to hear me, right?
“Julian…?” I heard Max’s voice somewhere from my right, “I’m here…over here.”
His voice sounded weak and scared, “Quickly.”
“I’m coming, bro!” I slowly made my way towards the direction his voice came from until I eventually fell over something.
“Ouch! What the fuck!” Max creied out in pain.
I scrambled and finally, my hands made their way to his shoulder. I couldn’t help but give him a hug.
“I thought…,” I decided not to say it.
“Bro, I’m hurt. Get off me already.” He groaned at me.
“How long did you fall for?” I asked, just to ascertain whether I was making something up.
“A few good minutes. Honestly don’t know how I survived, but I landed on my fucking ankle. It’s done for, Justin.”
“Let me help you…,” I reached around him and helped him up.
“Now what?” he asked.
I couldn’t see him. The darkness was too powerful, even more suffocating down here. But it felt good to hold him, know somebody was there.
I tried to force a chuckle and said, “Original exit is not an option anymore.”
I don’t know why but I could feel Max staring daggers at me.
He sighed and said, “Let’s walk in one direction, find a wall, and walk around.”
“Like in a Maze…”
“What?”
“The best way to escape a maze is to pick a wall and stick to it, no matter what. Sooner or later, you will find an exit,” I explained.
“Makes sense. Where did you hear that?”
“Internet. Spent a lot of time there.”
“I figured…,” He said almost wistfully, “What does the internet say about impossible, fucking, black hellscapes?”
“Don’t go in…”
“I fucking hate you…,” Max said.
Something dropped in my stomach, that feeling of having disappointed someone you hold dearly.
I asked, “Do you mean that?”
Max snorted and responded, “Depends on if we make it out of here, buddy.”
We walked and walked. Max’s phone also broke, so we had to just commit to a direction and hope for the best.
We kept going strong but soon both our bodies became weary. We became thirsty and hungry and our bruised selves were starting to slow down. Every moment we were hoping to just run into a wall and break our noses, shouting in pain and joy but that stop never came.
We barely said a word to each other, just holding out our arms around us.
I was the first to break down, almost taking Max along with me on my way to my knees. I couldn’t help but start sobbing. The was a constant back and forth in my head, as my mind raced from each moment I fucked up and what I should’ve done better.
Never should’ve entered the building. Never should’ve forced Max to come with me. Should’ve run out and asked for help when he fell…I should’ve never come back.
A dark thought passed through. If I had died in Canada, my parents wouldn’t have known of it for some time, staying blissfully ignorant and happy, thinking that their son was trying their best. If I were to disappear in these woods, in this hole, it wouldn’t take them as long. Their devastation, sorrow, and grief would come much quicker.
Again, when I think about it now, it seems like such a strange line of reasoning but in the end, I know now as I did then what my mind was trying to tell me: You’ve fucked up.
Max tried to console me, “Don’t worry. We’re going to make it. Other people have seen this place. Maybe somebody will come and find us.”
“I’m sorry,” was all I could get out.
“I know, buddy,” this time Max held me.
And so we just remained there for a bit, hugging it out, trying to get some relief out of our situation.
We would venture onwards, the reality dawning on us that the bottom of this hole was larger than we could’ve imagined.
At some point, we couldn’t take it anymore. Exhausted, we decided to take a break and sat down. Max, took his jacket bundled it up, and used it as a pillow to raise his ankle. I couldn’t help but look around, knowing I wouldn’t make out anything.
Eventually, my head felt weary and I followed Max’s idea and used my jacket as a pillow.
“What are you doing?” he asked.
“I’m tired…,” I responded.
“Yes. Fall asleep.”
“Hey! Don’t judge me. You sat down first.”
Max said: “I didn’t say anything.”
As if electrocuted, every hair on my body stood up and I became tense, my eyes staring widely into the abyss above me.
“What?” I asked.
“I didn’t say anything…,” Max answered.
We both stood up, gripping our jackets and each other.
“Just rest…,” a voice said again.
It was close, somewhere around us. It sounded human and comforting but upon hearing it again it was clear that it wasn’t mine or Max’s.
We started turning in circles, on guard for anything to come out at us.
Max whispered, “I say we run as fast as we can.”
“Got it.”
The voice appeared again, “Don’t run….be with me.”
It sent a shudder down our spines. It was different this time. Before it was a male voice, now it sounded like the soothing tone of a mother tucking you into bed at night.
“GO!” Max shouted and we booked it.
Admittedly, given our circumstances, we could've known it was pointless but our need to survive took over.
We ran as fast as we could, as fast as our tired legs allowed us. Max’s ankle wasn't helping.
Then there it was: In the distance, we saw a light.
There was hope and that propelled us to pick up the pace just a little.
Arm in arm, we made our way towards the bright spot in the distance. I could hear Max’s moans get increasingly more severe. He wouldn’t be able to take much more.
Then the light moved, ever so slightly.
I stopped us in our tracks.
“Shhhh,” I said to Max.
The light almost danced, left to right and up and down. We couldn’t help but follow it. As it danced it became bigger and brighter.
“Oh shit…” Max whispered.
We hunkered down, but we knew it was too late. It was moving towards us.
Oh shit, oh fuck, oh my fucking god,” Max was losing it.
I slapped his shoulder, “Get it together.”
With the light, a figure appeared in the darkness. It followed the light, almost floating towards us. We had to shield our eyes from the bobbing, ball that illuminated us. We had been in the dark so long that it felt as if we were looking into the sun.
The orb moved to be just above us and the figure stopped about two or three meters from us, its back still covered in darkness. It looked like a woman, pale yet beautiful and naked.
“Please stay.” she said, “I’ll make you comfortable.”
Max shouted, “Just let us leave! Please!”
The figure receded back into the darkness and reappeared behind us, now a man, just as pale and handsome.
Max gripped me harder.
I asked, “How many are you?”
The man responded, “Only one…but I can be many,” It looked at me and tilted its head, “Why did you come here?”
“We just wanted to explore…,” I said.
“You did. Your friend did not.”
My heart froze over but Max tapped my shoulder.
“I wouldn’t just abandon my friend like that,” he answered.
The creature moved closer to Max, “I don’t want you…You are no good to me anymore.”
Something came from the darkness and snatched Max. Even with the light, I couldn’t make it out. A black mass entangled Max’s legs and lifted him up.
I managed to hold onto him and a tug of war began, all the while Max was screaming. It nearly got dragged with him but after a while, he seemed to have been released and dropped back onto the floor.
This time he hit his head and was knocked out cold. I checked on him but apart from a pulse and shallow breathing, there was no response.
“Curious,” the man said, “The way you fight back…Maybe I misjudged you.”
It came closer again. I could hear a large mass dragging and a foul smell emanating from the man’s direction. I had to cover my nose for a second.
“What do you want from me?” I asked.
“Your darkness. It gives me pleasure.”
“What darkness?”
“Why were you drawn to this place? Why wasn’t your friend?”
“I just wanted to explore, wanted to do something.”
“Mmmm…yes…but didn’t this place strike you as unusual?”
I looked down.
“Yes. You embraced the darkness. Why?”
“You seem to know why.”
There was a guttural sound, profoundly unsettling and unholy. It sounded like laughter. Once again, the figure vanished and appeared beside me, now a young woman, closer to my age.
“You want to stay here, don’t you? Let the darkness around you match the one inside your mind.”
My hands became fists, “What are you talking about?”
“Do you really care where you are? The end would be just the same and just as welcomed. Your parents would be devastated either way.”
I twitched slightly. Did it know what I was thinking?
“I don’t want to fucking die!” I resisted.
“But you don’t care if you do,” it responded and it was right.
My body went limp and again there was that unnatural laughter. The girl took a deep breath and smiled, “Ah yes…Despair. Humans are full of it.”
“Human? What are you?”
The figure smiled and the orb lowered to be just above my head. My eyes widened. As I followed it, I could see a long, thin stretch of skin elongate towards the figure, which was now raised up in the air, and in front of me were eyes, large, black, and too many to count, paired with one enormous row of sharp teeth.
That was about as much as I could and wanted to make out.
It spoke again, its maw unmoving and its voice a cacophony of seemingly thousands of different people speaking in unison, “See me.”
I wanted to run but I knew it was futile. Besides, Max was still lying by my feet. I wouldn’t just leave him with this monster.
I couldn’t help but my body began to shake and I was beginning to hyperventilate.
“Yes!” the creature droned, all its eyes fixed on me.
Kneeling down, I felt the darkness encroach on me.
What could it do? Should I just submit? Maybe I could bargain to save Max and at least do one good thing with my life.
I thought about it. In the end, what would happen if I made it out of this? Nothing good. I would be back to my same old, miserable life only now with the knowledge that creatures like this exist. What if this wasn’t the only one? What if there were more? Why did I have to go inside? Why? Why? Why?
My mind was spiraling once again.
I could feel the monster drawing closer, soaking in my misery.
Why wouldn’t it just take me? Why make me choose? Was it savoring me?
I asked, “Why not just get it over with?”
“Mmmm…Simple. Your total submission is the ultimate meal, the only way to make you mine.”
“What if I refuse…”
It laughed and Its whole mass was shaking, “I am older than your human history could ever conceive. I will wait. Others will come and one day you will find your way back to me. I’m not bound here. I live in your darkness.”
“That’s it?” I couldn’t believe it, trying to hide my fear in a simple response.
“That’s it…You will remember me. He won’t. You will come back to me. Of that, I have no doubt. My darkness will always be there to comfort you.”
I took another look at Max and remembered the way he initially asked me to come out and now here he is, stuck with me and this abomination. Nevertheless, I couldn’t help but smile.
He really was there for me.
“I want to leave. You are just another thing in my life. Another thing I will get over, just like I always do.”
The creature drew back a little, but I could make out how its teeth were forming a smile.
“So be it,” it said and suddenly everything went dark.
And just like that there was light again. I was lying on the concrete floor in a room, filled with a huge generator and other electrical boxes. Just ahead of me was light, not some false promise but sunlight. It was the door I had broken down earlier, illuminating my face. In the end, unobscured by some kind of eldritch magic, it really had just been a small building to do with the power grid.
Max was next to me, also waking up.
“What the fuck happened? How did we fall asleep and why do we look like shit?” He asked.
I was almost relieved. I didn’t want him to remember but I also didn’t have an adequate explanation. I simply helped him up. His ankle was still messed up and we humped out back into the forest.
It couldn’t have been more than maybe a few hours, if even. The sun had barely moved.
I helped him back to my house, where I called him an ambulance to look at his injury. The entire time he was asking questions, I had no answer. I simply said that he tripped on a loose wire, twisted his ankle, and took me with him. He didn’t believe me but he also didn’t press further. I don’t think he really ever trusted me after that. Again, I could live with that. I had other concerns and I was happy that he wouldn’t have to live with what I had dragged him into.
While I would like to say it ended there, it wasn’t quite so.
What we went through and what I had made Max endure, the memory of it or not, stayed with me, sending daggers through my heart. Then there was the unavoidable reality of what that monster had said to me.
I tried to forget and move on. I even went back to Canada, trying to pick up my life. But I began having nightmares, constantly avoiding dark spaces and sleeping with all my lights on.
I recently even started going to therapy. It was less to get better but almost more as a declaration of a fight. That thing would not see me again. I had to get better.
Well, I still don’t have a job, which is partly why I’m writing this here, seeing what others have witnessed here, made me think it was as good a place as any to tell my story.
Therapy helped a little but my life is still not what I wanted it to be, but I’m trying to stay positive. Yet, I am afraid. What if I’m just lying to myself?
Every time, I feel my inner void getting the best of me, I try to think back. I think back to my family accepting me as I am and how my friend decided to follow me into a hellhole, just because he didn’t want to leave me alone.
Recently, I decided to take a walk through the local park, during the day of course. Passing by the bathrooms, my eyes drifted and Instead of the halogen lamps, I saw only darkness. I’ve convinced myself that it was stress, some kind of PTSD, but I can’t be sure. I put my head down and kept walking.
So here’s a bit of advice. Be happy. Trust me, I know it’s hard, but there’s always something. Find things to be happy about, because if you don’t something else might find you instead.

I am not sure what it did to my brain. I humped my pillow everyday since I was 4, and only realized I was masturbating when I was 25. I am 32F with high sexual drive. And only lately enjoyed penetration. I started having sex when I was 21 with my first bf. It was painful, never enjoyed sex with all my boyfriends. It was like torture and did it until he finishes. I only get turned on, never cummed at that time. Only enjoyed sex when I was drunk or with my pillow. I lately met a guy who taught me about sex. And at the age of 32, I finally can have sex sober and orgasm, and actually enjoy penetration. The key is to release and relax. Lol AMA

I'm already feeling pretty irritated by cats as of late, and was trying to find some positivity in living with them by getting some cuddle time with one of them tonight. I was just lying on my back when one of my family's cats just came and flopped on my belly, and for what it's worth it was relaxing for a little bit. Then she started doing that kneading thing while biting my shirt, walked up my chest and started biting my pillow, setting her ass right on my neck. Before I could get her off she started vibrating and humping my damn neck! I tossed her out of my room amd have just been in a bitter state since. Aparently it's not unusual behavior, even in fixed and female cats, but nonetheless it feels pretty disgusting and just soured the whole experience. As I said in ny last post here I'm definitely looking forward to the day I don't live with cats anymore, and I certainly haven't changed my mind on that after this experience.

im still a virgin. im ovulating currently and i was dry humping my pillow as i was watching p**n. after i was done, i went into pee asap and there was red. my period was over 2 weeks ago and now im very concerned as to what this is.
the skin around my vagina also has been looking weird to me recently. did i tear my hymen? what is all this blood supposed to mean?
also, im sure it isn't related to this but blood was coming out of my anus everytime i had a pooped. it stopped for a while after i showed it to a doctor and got diagnosed with nothing. today i saw it again and there was alot of blood. i have never seen this much blood come out, it was excessive.

So I have a four year old dog that we got as a puppy, he is a mut but a DNA test proves he is mostly a yellow lab. When we got him, we were told by the shelter that he was neutered. He humps a lot of things, however. He used to hump anything he saw; our leg, our whole selves if we sat down, pillows, blankets, stools, etc. Now, though, he only humps blankets and pillows. He does hump these things quite often, and just today I saw him as he finished; his penis was out, erect, and at the base I saw two large balls. As the point of a neutering is removal of the testicles, I am asking: Do you think my dog was really neutered? Is there a way I could tell without taking him to a vet? Why might the shelter have claimed he was neutered if he isn't?
Update: I can't believe so many people saw this in such a short time! Thank you all, I realized what I saw was just the bulbus glands.

Is it wrong for me to hate my partners dog
I have always been a dog lover but since meeting his dog, I have slowly become a dog hater.
Backstory — we met from our mutual love for our dogs. It was thoroughly expressed at the beginning of our relationship how much passion/love we had for our pets. Mine: long haired, female, older dog. His: short hair, male, younger dog.
This butthole of a dog; jumps on you, marks on everything, can’t walk without pulling, barks at everything, humps at dog parks, steals toys/balls, literally uses a house and a car like it’s a jungle gym, destroys all toys, whining constantly, sheds like crazy (short hair so it’s like needles), howls when you leave him for 2 mins, NO RECALL and worst of all… sleeps in the bed.
My dog: trained so well she could be a service dog and only sheds twice a year. She is SO mannered, I can’t even explain all traits she possesses. Her only “cons” she very protective (doesn’t like other dogs in her bed or touching my purse and barks 3 times when someone rings the door bell) Recently she’s been very yappie when playing fetch with over dogs.
I’m on the verge of ending this relationship out of hatred for this ballsack. I’ve expressed my need for his dog to be trained. Especially since now my dog is picking up bad habits (pulled on the leash, barking in the car, whining).
I’ve told him my rules for the house, which I don’t think are unreasonable; No dogs on the couch while eating there, no playing/scratching the couch, dogs don’t sit on top on the couch/in the pillows, No dogs under the sheets in the bed/no sleeping in the bed, dogs sleep in there own beds, certain toys are not shared, no dogs in the garden, no begging, dogs sit nicely in the backseat of the car, no jumping on people and dogs wait for permission before jumping on the bed/couch. He always agrees but NOTHING changes!!!
His dog is not stupid, it has so much potential to be an amazing dog. I’m showing him how to train it, but he’s not consistent to see a difference.
This issue is, he think his dog has no faults. The dog will be humping another dogs and he laughs! Like wtf go get your dog. He’s dog will sneeze, he like ”I think my dog is sick” but if I hurt myself he like “oh are you okay”. He doesn’t think his dogs sheds but it’s EVERYWHERE. We have been dating for 2 years and his dog is still his background on his phone….
I’m over not being his top priority and I’ve expressed that but I don’t think it will change. I want to grow together but I think this dog will always come before me.
The WORST OF WORST, he want to breed this horrible creature and have another one of its puppy’s. I will not! I don’t believe in having the same dog breed more than once and I definitely don’t believe in having a dog that is unruly/doesn’t work for your lifestyle.
AITAH for having this hate or is this normal?

To be honest I didn’t think I would even get this far, because before one week ago I was addicted to the most disgusting kind of porn ever, I was too far down the rabbit hole. But now since starting a week ago I haven’t had THAT bad of urges which is when it’s supposed to be the worst mainly because the last time I fapped I had the worst clarity ever and I fully put into perspective what I was doing and how wrong it was for one of the first times, I’ve noticed my confidence has went up only a bit because I feel more confident looking people in the eyes now even though I haven’t been doing it for that long. Literally the best tip I can give is just think logically and why you’re doing this and to put into perspective how wrong what you are doing is, and if you get horny and get boners just hump your pillow or something soft that you like, thrust it only a few times and that urge to fap just seems to almost entirely go away for some reason which I don’t think I’ve seen ever get talked about. Once again I’m proud that I’ve came this far (no pun intended) and will never fap or intentionally watch porn in my life again.

I

This has everything;
Halsin’s bad cooking, Gale being an idiot, tadpole shenanigans, pillow humping, mage hand and other wizard silencing threats, wizard on rogue violence, squishy sweetness, power play, butt stuff, YOU NAME IT