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Kittl is a creative platform that allows users to create stunning artworks with a wide range of fonts and templates.
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In 2017 I was forced to resign from my position as the Lead Teacher for an Autism program within a district. I was sought after to create an Autism program within a public high school setting. It was a job I had spent years dreaming of. I created the program and my students were thriving more than ever before, but my coworkers and administrators found every reason to belittle me. Ultimately I was told I cared too much, that I cared too much about my students and was willing to jeopardize my job for the sake of my students. They weren’t wrong. As a special education teacher my students’ needs came first, that is why I became a teacher afterall. Ultimately, the district was aware that I suffered from major depression and anxiety and they requested I get a psych evaluation done to see if I was fit to work with students. It was done with their psych of choosing of course and it was determined that I “lacked interpersonal relationship skills” and it would be best if I resigned. Of course I didn’t have to resign because they weren’t firing me and it was on grounds that they couldn’t fire me on anyway, but by that point I was so uncomfortable and afraid to go to work I had become a hermit.
I had a one year old son and almost never left the house. My identity was stripped of me. I did try to go back to work in other school settings. I worked at two private schools and one public school. No matter how hard I tried my heart wasn’t in it anymore. I lived in constant fear that if I helped a student I would be ridiculed again and have to leave another job. At the first job I took I was in a private school setting and because I worked with severely disabled children who could be aggressive I managed to receive three concussions in less than a 2 month period of time. This led to me not being able to work in that environment and I moved on to an alternative school within a district setting where students who couldn’t be within the public school setting could still have access to the public school environment. That job was a very thankless disheartening job as the parents blamed the staff for everything and the students didn’t want to be helped. For someone like me it was emotionally taxing and I went home crying daily. At that point I had a two year old son that was beginning to show signs of having Autism. Life was sure throwing me some curve balls. I moved onto another private school job by January of 2019 only to get hit in the head twice more. The neurologist told me at that point that one more bad hit to my head could leave me a vegetable, but I didn’t want to give up. I was the breadwinner in our home. I carried a lot of the weight of our household and had for years.
It became more apparent that my own son was Autistic and I had begun having multiple panic attacks daily as well as would hide in my bedroom and sleep all the time when my husband was home. I ended up having a complete nervous breakdown and ended up hospitalized. My doctors decided due to my mental health I was no longer able to work. This rocked my world. I didn’t know how to do anything but be a teacher. Filing for social security disability was a nightmare and it took me two years to finally get it. By the time I got it my marriage had fallen apart, my son was diagnosed with Autism and while trying to get treatment for my own issues we were in so much debt from not having two incomes.
On January 4, 2022, I tried to end my life. I ate castor beans. By the grace of God there was a former army medic on staff and she saved my life. Her name is Hope and I will forever be grateful to her. After I came home from treatment we did the best to pretend everything was alright but my marriage was broken. I was the only one fighting to hold it together. My mental health tore us apart, our son’s autism diagnosis and doing everything possible for his best interests led to us not communicating and becoming roommates. Last year I finally got sick and tired of being sick and tired. I told my husband we were over but I wanted to try to live as roommates because it was best financially and I thought it was best for our son. By September of 2023 I relived it wasn’t best for anyone. My mental health took a drastic decline again and I ended up in a residential treatment facility. It was the most difficult 32 days of my life. It was the first time in my sons’s life I wasn’t there everyday. I missed his first day of second grade, I missed picture day. Debt piled up again. We were drowning. When I got home I had set firm boundaries to protect myself and we agreed that after the holidays my husband would move out. Fast forward to now. It’s just my son and I. My ex sees him twice a week and helps financially when he can. Unfortunately living in the great state of NJ where the cost of living is expensive and getting financial assistance is near impossible. I’m in that place where on paper it looks like I have enough disability and child support come in so I’m not eligible for any assistance. Reality though is I can’t put food on the table. Most days I’m having to choose between a bill to see a dr. I had a hysterectomy last November and have had severe sciatica since. I’ve been to multiple doctors with no relief and every day I fear I’m going to no longer have function of my right leg/ foot. My mental health is beginning to suffer again. I can feel myself slipping backwards and I’m so afraid I won’t be able to recover this time.
I’m behind on all of my bills, household and medical. I still have 3 totes full of paperwork I haven’t even gotten a chance to look at. Collection agencies call all day long. My son needs in home therapy again but I can’t afford it and our insurance doesn’t cover it.
I’m drowning and feel like I’m stuck out in the ocean about to sink to the bottom. I question everyday if I have any fight left in me. I’m trying to do what’s best for myself and my son. I’m resorting to this, to asking strangers for help because I am honestly ashamed and have exhausted asking family and friends for help.
If you’ve read all of this I greatly appreciate you. It means the world to me that you even care enough to have read all of this. I truly hope that you can find it in your heart to help in any way possible. If you are able to help in anyway possible please send me a message. I’m more than willing to answer any questions
Thank you in advance for all the kindness and support.
https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/3J5SDR5TZB05J?ref_=wl_share

InVideo studio is currently offering this 30% off discount of their premium plan. Means you will save up to $108/year.
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I got diagnosed bipolar again and been put on lithium. I was on adderall xr before that but she stopped it because of a trial period or something for mania. it was really helpful and has been awful not having it. has anyone else had this happen? are you able to have stimulants for adhd while having bipolar? she has tried to "normalize" my complaints about not having it so I'm worried it's just a matter of time until it's just explicitly off the table.

Question: The percent composition of an unknown element X in CH3X is 32%. What element is X? {answer is Li}
Ok so I searched online for problems in which you find a unknown element in a compound given percent comp.
I learned how to solve this problem IF the KNOWN elements have a %. I would do:

• 100 - the % = % of unknown. the % number just becomes grams. I know of grams of both elements.
• I multiply grams of the known element by molar mass to get mols.
• I compare the ratio between elements in the compounds to determine mols of the other element.
• grams of unknown / mols from the ratio = molar mass. Look for matching molar mass on Period table

But for the problem type Im facing I have no clue what to do when only the unknown element has information of percent composition. I tried to mess around with the numbers a lot but never got to the answer. I struggled to find problems that were similar to this one. :(
I would appreciate any guidance on this problem

Please use this post to discuss your training for the day or any simple questions you have! Talk about how lifts went, your workouts PRs achieved, goals set, whatever!

USEFUL LINKS

• 5/3/1 FAQs <<<<< start here!
• 5/3/1: Common Errors and Ideas on how to Customize it to your Needs
• Routine Picker - template decision tree
• 5/3/1 Primer - 531 principles & concepts
• 5 Common Misconceptions... About 5/3/1
• Training After an Illness
• Jim Wendler's Blog
• 5/3/1 Forever book
• 5/3/1 Forever Table of Contents

COMMON TEMPLATES

• 5/3/1 for Beginners
• Boring But Big: Beefcake Training
• 5/3/1 Beach Body Challenge
• Boring But Big 3-Month Challenge
• 5/3/1: How to Build Pure Strength
• Building the Monolith - 5/3/1 for Size
• Comprehensive list of public templates

TOOLS

After being a member for a year I decided to go on a mission in 2022 and was called to serve in Utah.
My comp and I lived in a single members basement under his woodworking shop. We biked through Utah in the middle of a record cold winter. I mean I biked through snow, sleet, hail, you name it. The member wanted to save money so he never turned on the hot water or heater. So after biking all day every day we had to go home to a cold shower. I used to have to put on 8 layers of clothing and I was still freezing biking through the snow. To make matters worse, my comp was a diagnosed sociopath.
None of her comps got along with her (my mission Pres told me that. I guess he paired me with her because I was the oldest sister on the mission so he thought I could handle her). She told me that on her past time (before the mish) her and her mom would make fun of overweight people during sacrament meeting. I caught her lying to a member once and told her that I’m amazed at how good of a liar she is (it freaked me out) she said “thanks, I can cry on command - want to see?” And I KID YOU NOT she starts bawling. And then like a switch she wiped her tears, smiled and said “see?” And kept walking like it was nothing. She used to bike ahead of me and slam on her breaks so I would run into her.
When we did comp inventory and checked each others FB messages I saw her talking trash about me to other missionaries. Often my bike would randomly break down, like my belt would fly off while I was riding or my dress would get caught in the bike spokes, causing me to fall and scrape my knee. This was a daily occurrence. My comp would notice and laugh at me.
Members felt bad for us that we were biking in the cold all the time and would offer to give us rides. I used to accept their offer, then one day my companion said that I’m not a true missionary because I accept offers for rides. After that she would not allow members to give us rides. She would often lie to members and say “oh no need to give us a ride we live right down the road” even though really we had to bike several miles from one end of our area to the other straight up hill, late at night in the below-freezing weather.
One time I was so stressed out I barely slept for 4 days. I was so sleep deprived I literally passed out and banged my head on the table at the Stake center. So during our 1 hour lunch time I napped. I got in so much trouble (against the rules to nap during your lunch hour apparently).
I was so depressed I talked to a mission therapist and he told me that if I kept having appointments with him then my mission Pres would send me home. I only had 2 appointments with him total.
I also suffered crazy physical symptoms too like I almost fainted every time we arrived at members houses, developed high blood pressure (I was 25 yo), rapid heart beat and I went through the symptoms of a heart attack once (probably because I was traumatized!)
They were highly focused on baptism numbers. We always tried to beat other districts numbers of baptisms each month. We tried to maintain the record of being one of the highest baptizing missions in the world.
And they were so obsessed with rules. As if the mission Presidents rules, area authorities rules, church leadership rules weren’t all enough - my comp made up her own rules for me to follow as well. This is going to be TMI so TW: but I was on my period. We weren’t allowed to go to our apartment during prime pros (prime pros is holy time dedicated for finding investigators. It’s considered holy time because it’s time that investigators are out and ready to hear our message moreso than any other time. Since it’s holy time there’s special rules that only apply during that time.) But to make matters worse - my comp made up her own rules, like she didn’t allow me to buy tampons during prime pros because it’s not holy in her book. So I had to go to members houses in bloody clothes.
There was a dumb rule that members weren’t allowed to feed us throughout the week. Since I served 13 wards and 2 branches, our schedules were often so full that some days we had to go without eating. I used to have to give 4 talks a Sunday and go to several Stake meetings afterwards. One member of the Stake once said “Sister, smile” after I hadn’t eaten at all that day, just finished 4 talks (biked to each ward to give them) and was sleep deprived. I shot daggers at him from my eyes after he said that.
We were only given 1 hour to make and eat lunch. If you didn’t make and eat food within that time then you had to go without. My comp believed that overbooking our schedule makes us better missionaries so she constantly scheduled meetings with members during our lunch time.
I had to read talks during comp study every morning about how “obeying with exactness” and how “God will only bless you if you obey with exactness.” And I was forced to read the mission handbook every day. I read it several times cover to cover on my mission.
Then I went through a full blown faith crisis after reading the gospel topics essays and Institute Manual.
It was hard going to members houses, hearing them talk about their son that’s on their mission and loving it and how I must love my mission and I had to keep my mouth shut.
I prayed to God every day that I would get hit by a car. I had never been so depressed. At the end of my mission, I was so scared of my companion that I ran away from her. The police were called. All the missionaries drove around looking for me. Obviously they found me.
(Side note - it wasn’t until the end of my mission I learned that my STL had the EXACT same experience with her when they were companions together. My STL was also scared of her.)
My mission Pres tried to talk me into staying but by that point I was done. I went home after the 4 month mark.
My experience definitely left a bad taste in my mouth toward the church. I still get haunted by my memories and go to therapy. It changed me. I’ll never be the same. Now members love to bring up how I “only served for 4 months.” I bet they wouldn’t have lasted a month on my mission.
Is this normally how missions go? Are they normally set up this way and have this type of environment? Or is my experience a unique one?

The purpose of the AITS (All India Test Series) exam is to assist students in getting ready for competitive examinations, particularly engineering admission exams such as the Indian IIT-JEE (Joint admission Examination). Numerous coaching centers and associations, including FIITJEE, Allen Career Institute, and others, are in charge of organizing the AITS. The following are some crucial AITS components:
Target Audience: Students in classes 11 and 12 as well as those retaking the year with the express purpose of raising their JEE ranks are the target audience for the AITS.
Purpose: The purpose of the AITS is to replicate the settings of the real admission examinations. This aids students in becoming acquainted with the format of the exam, learning how to effectively manage their time, and pinpointing their areas of weakness.
Structure: The test series typically consists of several tests covering every topic included in the entrance exam syllabus. The format and level of difficulty of these examinations are designed to resemble those of the real exams.
Frequency: Throughout the academic year, the tests are usually administered at regular intervals, giving students the opportunity to periodically assess their level of preparedness.
Analysis and Comments: Performance analysis reports and comprehensive solutions are given following every test. These reports frequently highlight strengths and shortcomings by comparing the report to that of peers.
Accessibility: The AITS is available to a larger range of students in a variety of locales thanks to the availability of both offline (in a physical classroom) and online versions offered by several coaching centers.
Students hoping to place highly in competitive exams may find that taking part in the AITS helps them develop strong study habits and self-confidence.

Also read:

Time Table for JEE/NEET Aspirant
Online vs Offline Coaching- Which id Better?
How to Memorize Formulas Quickly
Mind Management Before Exams

We want to have a head table at our wedding that includes bridal party and their SO.
I have 8 bridesmaid (1 maid of honor, 1 matron of honor, 6 bridesmaids, and 1 13 y/o junior bridesmaid) FH is having 4 groomsman (1 best man, 3 groomsman). With the bridesmaids there are 4 SO and with the groomsmen there’s 2.
I don’t know what to do with a layout?? Any advice or templates welcome!

About 2 months ago I (20M) went on a date with this coworker (21F) who I met after recently working at a new restaurant. I then tried to set up a second date and while she verbally agreed and we scheduled a day, she never responded to my text trying to specify details until the day after we scheduled (about 4 days of silence).
Her text was a steaming pile of disingenuous bs about how she had no service when she saw my text and then forgot to respond. She followed that by saying that she wasn’t interested in dating but “really enjoys talking to me”.
So I was obviously upset, but I knew that I couldn’t take the situation too deep or I’d look like a butthurt little baby being passive aggressive towards her. So I come into work the day after she texts me all that bs, and this girl has the AUDACITY to act flirty with me, continuously try to strike up convos and enter into my field of vision. At one point she even grabbed something off a table that I was like, directly in front of. I mean like this girl took her hand and had it less than a foot away from my crotch. Didn’t ask me to move out of the way, just totally broke my personal space. Annoying as fuck. I didn’t say anything but gave her a blank stare trying to communicate to stop acting weird.
By this point I haven’t been anything but cordial with her, but she then took it another step further the next day. She called me “baby” in passing and at first I didn’t think much of it since it’s common vernacular for women, but when she then called me “babe” about an hour after I couldn’t handle it. I walked up to her and I said in a very calm tone “Not trying to be an ahole, just don’t use the baby word”. She awkwardly laughed and that was that.
By this point I had begun to ignore her as she was in my mind acting super socially inept and inconsiderate. But after two weeks of avoidance I begin to be more cordial, asking for help and offering help as well.
This is the part of the story where I legitimately lose all respect for this girl. I was standing at a device punching in an order for a table and this girl walks up to me and for five seconds just stared directly at me with puppy dog eyes. She was standing less than 5 feet from me. I never acknowledge her and walk off.
My reason for being upset here is because her actions seem to reflect a basic lack of respect for me and my feelings regarding the situation. It felt objectifying to have this girl just play games with me after ghosting me for a date. After that I ignored her for another two weeks.
I then do some meditation on the ordeal and feel as though the only way to remedy the situation is to just have an open and honest conversation. So I text her apologizing for my avoidance and propose to talk about the whole situation. She agrees.
I then talk to her later that day after our shift and basically explain to her that the reason as to why I was avoiding her was because she was disingenuous in her response to ghosting me for the date and that she was playing games after the fact. She admitted to lying about the lack of response, but chalked the whole “playing games” thing to awkwardness. I never went into specifics about the games she was playing (the puppy dog eyes and the flirty behavior) as I didn’t want the conversation to feel like an interrogation, but in retrospect I should have. I just said “ok” and then ended the conversation unfulfilled. I walked away thinking that she literally thought I was stupid and didn’t think I had any self respect.
So I text her a couple of days after our convo and basically tell her that I was unsettled by her explanations. She never responded as the text was pretty confrontation, still respectful but pretty asserting.
This all leads to a couple of days ago (about 2 weeks after our conversation) when I confront her on the fact that she was playing games and that I wasn’t stupid. I tell her about the puppy dog eyes situation and she acted like she had no idea what I was talking about. So I just roll my eyes at her and tell her that I don’t think she’s being honest.
And now I’m here on reddit.
I have tried literally everything to make this situation right, but I can not tolerate disrespect or inauthenticity. Life is too short to be surrounded by that kind of character flaw.
I should mention that most of my coworkers resent the hell out of me for my behavior, and while I’ve never directly talked to any of them about the situation it’s quite clear that a bunch of them switched up on me when they learned about everything from her perspective. I come into work and have to deal with roughly 5 passive aggressive woman in their early twenties on a consistent basis. I’d be lying if I said that it didn’t bother me.
Obviously I’m pretty worked up, but am I wrong?
And most importantly, what do I do from here?

About 2 months ago I (20M) went on a date with this coworker (21F) who I met after recently working at a new restaurant. I then tried to set up a second date and while she verbally agreed and we scheduled a day, she never responded to my text trying to specify details until the day after we scheduled (about 4 days of silence).
Her text was a steaming pile of disingenuous bs about how she had no service when she saw my text and then forgot to respond. She followed that by saying that she wasn’t interested in dating but “really enjoys talking to me”.
So I was obviously upset, but I knew that I couldn’t take the situation too deep or I’d look like a butthurt little baby being passive aggressive towards her. So I come into work the day after she texts me all that bs, and this girl has the AUDACITY to act flirty with me, continuously try to strike up convos and enter into my field of vision. At one point she even grabbed something off a table that I was like, directly in front of. I mean like this girl took her hand and had it less than a foot away from my crotch. Didn’t ask me to move out of the way, just totally broke my personal space. Annoying as fuck. I didn’t say anything but gave her a blank stare trying to communicate to stop acting weird.
By this point I haven’t been anything but cordial with her, but she then took it another step further the next day. She called me “baby” in passing and at first I didn’t think much of it since it’s common vernacular for women, but when she then called me “babe” about an hour after I couldn’t handle it. I walked up to her and I said in a very calm tone “Not trying to be an ahole, just don’t use the baby word”. She awkwardly laughed and that was that.
By this point I had begun to ignore her as she was in my mind acting super socially inept and inconsiderate. But after two weeks of avoidance I begin to be more cordial, asking for help and offering help as well.
This is the part of the story where I legitimately lose all respect for this girl. I was standing at a device punching in an order for a table and this girl walks up to me and for five seconds just stared directly at me with puppy dog eyes. She was standing less than 5 feet from me. I never acknowledge her and walk off.
My reason for being upset here is because her actions seem to reflect a basic lack of respect for me and my feelings regarding the situation. It felt objectifying to have this girl just play games with me after ghosting me for a date. After that I ignored her for another two weeks.
I then do some meditation on the ordeal and feel as though the only way to remedy the situation is to just have an open and honest conversation. So I text her apologizing for my avoidance and propose to talk about the whole situation. She agrees.
I then talk to her later that day after our shift and basically explain to her that the reason as to why I was avoiding her was because she was disingenuous in her response to ghosting me for the date and that she was playing games after the fact. She admitted to lying about the lack of response, but chalked the whole “playing games” thing to awkwardness. I never went into specifics about the games she was playing (the puppy dog eyes and the flirty behavior) as I didn’t want the conversation to feel like an interrogation, but in retrospect I should have. I just said “ok” and then ended the conversation unfulfilled. I walked away thinking that she literally thought I was stupid and didn’t think I had any self respect.
So I text her a couple of days after our convo and basically tell her that I was unsettled by her explanations. She never responded as the text was pretty confrontation, still respectful but pretty asserting.
This all leads to a couple of days ago (about 2 weeks after our conversation) when I confront her on the fact that she was playing games and that I wasn’t stupid. I tell her about the puppy dog eyes situation and she acted like she had no idea what I was talking about. So I just roll my eyes at her and tell her that I don’t think she’s being honest.
And now I’m here on reddit.
I have tried literally everything to make this situation right, but I can not tolerate disrespect or inauthenticity. Life is too short to be surrounded by that kind of character flaw.
I should mention that most of my coworkers resent the hell out of me for my behavior, and while I’ve never directly talked to any of them about the situation it’s quite clear that a bunch of them switched up on me when they learned about everything from her perspective. I come into work and have to deal with roughly 5 passive aggressive woman in their early twenties on a consistent basis. I’d be lying if I said that it didn’t bother me.
Obviously I’m pretty worked up, but is the whole situation really not that deep?
And most importantly, what do I do from here?

So this, this takes a lot of contextual details into account, so strap in.
I (27F) have a brother, (33M). The age gap between us is relevant. Growing up, I just wanted to be friends with my brother, he was one of my favorite people in the world even if he did bully me sometimes.
I'm going to provide some examples of his treatment.
When I was about three, he came into my room after I had been put to bed, wearing a mask and holding a butter knife above me. Still afraid of masks to this day.
He would always drink every pitcher of something I made and never make any after finishing it. Sometimes I wouldn't even get a glass. My mom was busy fostering other kids and didn't have time for 'petty squabbles'. Once, I spit in the top of the pitcher and left the lid off so he could see it. He yanked away the bowl of cereal I was eating and spit in it, shoving it back so hard some spilled on me. I had just hit preteen age and was really sick of just taking his crap, so I splashed it back at him. He threw me to the ground and started hitting me. My mom heard the fighting and told us we were both at fault, so he never got punished.
One time, my parents busted him with drugs. There was a screaming match and he was only home from college for the holidays. Once he left, I felt safe to come out of my room again and was at the dining room table drawing or doing winter break worksheets or something. I think I was around 14. My brother came back in and got something from the kitchen before going back down to his room in the basement, but he said some snarky comment to me before going down. I hadn't even said anything or made a noise to warrant it. What I said in turn was 'At least I don't do drugs.' The next second, I was pulled up by my neck and my brother slammed me into the wall. Things are kind of foggy, but my next memory is waking up on the floor and crying for our parents. I'm not really sure what the punishment for that was. I think he just left and went back to college early to avoid it.
After the fight this post is actually about, I learned from my mom that he actively denied that this ever happened. I was really traumatized about it. The drug he claimed to be on became an almost catastrophic trigger. I would feel hands on my throat and the darkness closing in again at the mere mention of it, it could send me into a panic attack. I've gotten better about my reaction to it, but I still refuse to have it anywhere around me or in my life. It's a socially accepted drug, so it's cost me more than a few relationships. When I heard he denied it, I looked at my mom and said, how many times have I lied versus him? And why would I make up something like that? She's seen the reactions. I broke up with a guy I really liked because he refused to keep it away from me. If I saw a scene in a TV show when it was more recent, I would curl up into a ball and couldn't talk, my throat felt so tight, I just cried. I'd like to know how or why I would have faked reactions like that. She never really believed him since he was known to lie, but it was still appalling he tried to lie about something so severe.
And that's not all! Once, my mom kicked him out when she snapped at him for his dog hurting our dogs and he called her a bitch, living rent free with our parents at 27 after failing through college due to partying. My mom had enough and told him to get out. He texted me and asked if he could stay with me for the night, despite me being away at college 2 hours from our town. I didn't think my mom did anything wrong, but I couldn't bring myself to leave him alone like that. I still loved him, even after all that up there.
So I said yes. I lived in an apartment near campus with a roommate, and we each had our own bedroom and ensuite bathroom, plus the kitchenette and a living room we shared. I had a 'friend' at the time- I asked him if he could possibly bring some booze over for my brother, giving a quick run down of the situation, and he agreed that yeah, the man probably needed a drink (I wasn't old enough to purchase alcohol, so I asked him). All three of us hung out on the porch to make sure we didn't disturb my roommate until around 3 AM, where my brother's drunk comments are making me really uncomfortable so my 'friend' suggests we head to bed, since we have class in the morning, too. Friend regularly sleeps with me in my bed, so its not an issue. And I cleared the couch in the shared living room with my roommate before I told my brother it was okay. So I go in first, change into pajamas, and then let my brother in to do all the bathroom stuff he needed before bed. I'm laying down and half asleep when I'm yanked out of bed by my arm and forcibly pushed through my own door, my brother demanding my bed. 'Friend' gently stood up for me and reminded him that I was already being generous by letting him stay at all, he could at least respect me. My brother did not like that. He started slurring angry stuff at both of us and collecting his dog's toys, saying that he'll just drive all the way home if I'm going to be like this. This is after he consumed like, half a bottle of fireball. So that was NOT happening. I'm standing in the way of the front door and blocking it once my brother finally finds his keys and he starts pulling me away and hurting me. 'Friend' tackled him and pinned him to the ground in an old highschool wrestling hold. I snatch the keys and run into the kitchenette, remove the sink filter, and hold the keys close in case I have to throw them down the drain in desperation. My brother is screaming and hurling insults left and right and I'm deeply traumatized already because of his violence towards me and from the vitriol just makes me cry really hard. My roommate knows I'm quiet and the noise wakes her up and she asks what the hell is going on. I try to explain but I'm basically in hysterics and 'friend' explains for me, while calmly still pinning my brother. Roomie was in nursing school and turned on the Nurse Voice immediately to address my brother. She tells him she just lost a friend to a drunk driver, and it is not responsible to drive in this state. She'll perform sobriety tests periodically and when he passes, he can go. And if he continues and tries to leave, she will call the cops on him for drunk driving, and my 'friend' and I could probably tell the cops about the violence, too. Around 5 AM he was finally sober enough to pass and his last words to me were 'I hope you fucking like mom and dad, because we aren't family anymore'. It shattered me.
He didn't talk to me for 2 years.
I got presents when I came home on my birthday and christmas from him during that time, and my parents said he was busy working and left the presents early with them, he was still annoyed but we were family. I believed it. I later realized that my parents were lying and covering up for him because they knew it would have broken my heart.
At some point after that, he started turning himself around. He never really apologized for any of the things he did to me. But I let him back into my life anyway, because I loved him, and I had always wanted my brother to be my friend. Our family is really small. I was just happy to jump at the chance to hang out with him again. He ended up with a girlfriend and he bought a house where they both stayed, so I finally had a place to actually visit him since he had been more or less couch surfing until then. I was so excited. My brother was older and more mature, and he had his own house now! We could finally be close!
Obviously... That wasn't how things turned out.
Why exactly none of us like his girlfriend is a different, long story. But suffice it to say, we all pretty much hated her and hated that he was with her. She basically forbade us from being over at his house very much. I tried to overlook the crappy things she had done to us, because she and I shared a lot of traits and interests. I would have a cool sister! Now? It disgusts me that we share anything in common. Point is, I would still keep trying to be friendly with both of them. There came a day when I sat my brother down and had a real conversation with him. When he was truly sad, he seemed to come to me. He told me he wasn't happy with her. He just was terrified of being alone. He was really afraid of her being a mother, due to her mental and medical state, and the fact that she was so lazy around the house (working from home, too). And that was the last time I was over at his house, because we heard the girlfriend's comforter rustling and he panicked and shoo'ed me out of the house before she realized I was there. That was about 3 years ago.
I kept being really excited when he was over for holidays. But he was over for less and less, because they went with her family more, or she wanted to go home. He wouldn't show up on birthdays the day of, or even the weekend. It'd be like two weeks later, and it was almost always gift cards for my parents. Like jesus christ, the least you could do is hand your parent the card on their birthday. Anyway, I would always ask him to hang out later on and he'd say yeah, then back out at the last minute. It stung every time. I started asking less and less. It got to the point where he would even back out of playing animal crossing with me online, from the comfort of his own home. That's when I gave up. He used to text me once in a while with memes, at least. But that stopped long ago. I realized that I was the only one putting effort into our relationship, and it crushed me.
I'm not going to lie, I became really bitter about his girlfriend. When he announced they were engaged, none of our family was happy. But I managed to save the relationship between all of us by apologizing over text and pointing out that all our faces dropped with pain and confusion because he was referring to his fiancee by a nickname, that was also the name of our dog that had passed only a month ago. Which, that's partially true, that's definitely why my face looked shattered. I wasn't happy, but I wasn't going to bring it up.
As my brother got older and started making healthier decisions, I kept up hope that one day he'd come to his senses. Either ditch the fiance or put more effort into family relationships. But I started losing hope really quickly. I dreaded the day when they would tell us a wedding date or that a baby was on the way.
Mother's day came, and my brother backed out of brunch with my mom, stating he was tired from having breakfast with fiance's mom (yeah. yeah, that was a pretty common theme and just one more reason we didn't like them together). So he'd take her out the next weekend. Last year he backed out after being twenty minutes late because he took his fiancee to urgent care for one of her usual and frequent migraines. He kept telling us he wouldn't be long. Get her a refill on the injections she would use and come to us. An hour and a half later, he said to go home and that he was sorry, we'd reschedule.
He never rescheduled.
So, up comes the make up brunch for my mom this year. I had already given her my present, so she had at least some mother's day celebration. I woke up with a pretty bad headache and immediately downed allergy pills and advil so I could make it through brunch at least, for my mom's sake and to see if my brother had changed any. At this point in the relationship with my brother, I'm pretty bitter. I went back and checked my texts while we were waiting for him in the restaurant. The last text between my brother and I was January of this year. And it was me asking if hypothetically could I stay with him if my mom threw me out (I've asked it before many times, and he would say yes-- It's not really likely that my mom would throw me out, but I have kind of bad anxiety and it makes me feel better to have back up plans). He said 'uh maybe very short term it would be hell with my dogs and schedule lol' and I just stared at the text. He asked if I had considered getting my own place-- Well, yes, I have, but I really can't bring myself to do it because it would mean separating my family's two dogs (technically one is mine, ones is my parents', but they're so attached to each other) and I couldn't just leave my dog behind either. I told him not to worry, because mom had calmed down.
But back to breakfast. I'm usually a little more lively around my brother and usually try to talk to him a lot, about anything, or something I'm excited about. Between my bitterness and the headache, I didn't say more than 40 words through the whole meal, I think. The two times my brother spoke to me at all were to mansplain to me about my favorite Fallout character (its Hancock, he uses drugs, but you can get him off them if you do his friendship arc). He asked me if I'd seen the show yet. I told him no, because I asked a friend to watch through it and see if Hancock's drug use was too frequent or severe before I started it. And then he asked me who Hancock was. And I was like??? The guy with the lasagna face? Turns out Hancock is actually the main character of the show. He pretty much talked down to me 'you know they're not real drugs, right, they just exist in the universe. he takes his inhaler everyday'. Internally I'm like 'No you fucking moron, they're real drugs, with different names. If you paid attention to crafting or lore, you would realize that. You need fertilizer to make the drug you're talking about (jet)-- you know, like people who will shit in a bag and huff it. Buffout is basically steroids. And Hancock decreases his drug use if you become close with him, but sure, tell me about my favorite character you know shit about, not even his fucking name.' But I say none of this. I just return to being quiet and slowly eating my food. The other time he talked to me was when I asked the waitress if my mom could have a redo on her eggs because they weren't the cook she asked for (which, also, this is big for me! I have severe anxiety and ordering food is so hard, much less speaking up about an inconsistency) and my mom was so grateful. She didn't want to make a fuss, but I would, for her. When the lady took the eggs back he's all shitty like 'you know that if they fuck it up the first time, then they probably can't make it right, don't you' and I just looked at him and didn't bother responding. Like, okay. You assume its just one person back there making eggs? If one was screwed, either they would just refire it with extra care or one of the other line cooks would do it. I watch a ton of Kitchen Nightmares and Hells Kitchen, so I think I'm a little more familiar with the back of house or how the line works than my brother. And that people don't actually usually mess with your food for simple or reasonable requests. But he doesn't know that (actually, I roped my mom into Hell's Kitchen, and we then further roped my dad in, so Hell's Kitchen is now a Family Event), because of course he doesn't, he never asks about me or my interests. By the end of brunch, I'm just kind of pissed off, and my head is aching. We're walking out and my brother hands my mom a card. She opens it up and it says something something something grandma and opens on a sonogram. And I'm just so done with everything. I mutter to myself 'are you fucking kidding me'. My mom is putting up a good effort in being nice to soon to be wife and while personally, this disgusts me and crushed my spirit, I was not focused on the baby talk. I did manage to pick up his fiance saying 'oh yeah well i'm not on speaking terms with my family at the moment, so i have to talk to SOMEONE'S family haha' (like wow, okay, tell us you don't consider us family until we're a back up plan a little louder). We were out in the sun, it was hot, and my head was pounding. After a few minutes I asked 'can we go now' and my brother got shitty with me, because the world revolves around him (god forbid he had sympathy for a migraine given his own fiancee, but he didn't even notice to care that I said less than 50 words) and snapped at me that 'You don't have to be here, no one invited you'. And I was just done. I walked away closer to the car and I didn't catch it but my mom glared daggers at him and said that she had invited me. Then my brother said the thing that was the last straw.
'That's some fucking family for you.'
I was engulfed in rage. He put us on the back burner, barely spoke to us, minimized visits for his girlfriend's comfort, and yet somehow, he decided I was shitty family? I did his homework for him when I was a child and he was in high school. I always was there for him when he got depressed or existential crisis now and then. I advocated for my parents to make up with him after the fight where my mom kicked him out. When he tried to finish his degree since he only had one semester left when he really fucked it up, he asked ME for help, because he would need the help in the last core class he needed- Calculus. I was STILL IN HIGHSCHOOL. And I agreed! (He never ended up going, but that's not the point). I was the one who reminded my parents of what desserts he liked for family gatherings. I was the one who would dogsit for him when he would just leave without telling anyone, because he knew if I heard the dog cry in its crate I would feel bad and release it, and that I wouldn't put it away in a crate if I was home because I felt bad. I was the one that tried to convince my parents to give his fiance a second chance. I made 300 fake facebook accounts years ago before verification was a thing to vote for his band to headline a medium large concert for a decently known band.
He used to steal my things to pawn them for drug money. He would threaten to say goodbye to my chao when I reminded him it was my turn to play. He would call me a dependent loser for not having 'x' life skill already when he didn't have it at my age either, and long after that! He used physical force against me several times. He would purposely taunt me with things I was afraid of. He repeatedly cut me off and didn't talk to me for a while over some petty thing he got angry about, but 2 years was the longest ever by at least a year. He would use me as a kid to ask our parents about something he wanted, and me being a kid, would go along with it because I loved him and wanted to make him happy. He decided to spend one summer with his girlfriend in California or whatever during highschool and I was crushed and asked him if we would be able to hang out any before the next school year started because he would go away for college and he laughed in my face. He always used me as the soundboard to vent about my parents (again, I am much younger than him)! He would constantly make fun of me that I had no friends and that I would be alone all my life, and that continued through adulthood, too. He would talk down to me about my chosen second family/people I met online long distance. He would make fun of things I liked all the time knowing that I found his opinion important.
I had done nothing but love him my entire life, and he barely acknowledged me in his.
So I fucking lost it. I started screaming back at him (in public, in a parking lot, loud-- all things that are important because I have severe anxiety and hate making a spectacle, this was how far things had gotten) about how he was an ungrateful piece of shit and he had personally told me he wasn't happy with her and that she would be a terrible mother and all I wanted was for him to be happy but I'm shitty family? He resorted to his standard argument when he has no argument- Puff out his chest and say 'lay a hand on me, lay a hand on me'. My parents were so shocked by the fact that I had an outburst like that, they couldn't react for a moment. Neither of them told me off, at any point. My dad started to redirect me towards the car to end the argument and my brother has one last clapback 'remember when you asked to move in with me? yeah, this is wh--' I cut him off by screaming about when he asked ME to stay with me in my apartment and threw me out of my own room, and his only comeback was 'it wasn't YOUR apartment, it was THEIR apartment' pointing to my parents, because like for him, they paid for my accommodations in college. I had enough. I told him to never fucking contact me again, because he is NOT my fucking family, he chose his family and he is dead to me. And I got in the car. Didn't listen to another word.
My parents stayed out there with my brother and his fiance for a while. I hadn't known anything that had gone on until later when talking to my mom.
Again, neither one of them scolded me a single bit when they got in the car. They just gave me this really apologetic look because they knew how sad and hurt I had to be to finally cut him out of my life for good. I was really wound up and stressed out and I sort of asked my mom to choose between us-- Poor wording on my part, but I needed to be supported. My brother always got away with treating me like shit without any consequences-- And me not being in his life wasn't a consequence either, because his life would not change without me in it. She kinda got cross with me by saying she would never abandon either of us and I took it as 'you're enabling this by keeping contact, and saying that it's okay for him to treat me like this' and I went to my room. I shut my door and started sobbing my eyes out. My mom had heard me through two door and down the hall and she came to hug me. And I asked her straight up like 'what's going to happen at the wedding? are you going to go if he doesn't invite me?' Because like I said, he never had consequences for treating me like garbage my entire life. I wanted there to be SOME form of consequence. She did reassure me that if he pulled that move, neither one of my parents would go. We had a long talk about how it really hurt my feelings the way she said she wouldn't abandon either of us because, you know, at the time, it really felt like she wasn't supporting me with that choice. But I had also worded my question really poorly, being so upset and all. I told her how I felt about him not ever having any repercussions so I needed my parents to at least back me up on that. They don't plan on contacting him much, but won't outright abandon him if he needs something. But if it comes down to it, like if the wedding invite doesn't come, they would support me over my brother. And she had made it clear to him that family is like a totem pole, and on that totem pole, I definitely was higher than him.
A few days later, I was telling her how it still really hurt. I don't regret what I did and I will never take it back, but it pained me to know how little I really meant to him. I think I was hoping that the shock of me finally giving up on him would ring some alarm bells in his head. We were talking about it and she ended up conversationally giving me more details about what had happened after I got in the car and the aftermath. Apparently after my outburst, the fiance started walking away crying that 'first she didn't have her family, and now she doesn't have his family either'.
Remember how she said she wasn't on speaking terms with her family? Her older brother and his wife have a child that their mom babysits sometimes. They're considering another child, via IVF. The fiance is mad that her baby won't be her mom's priority if they have another child and that her brother was hogging their mom to babysit.
Yeah. Gee, wonder why they won't talk to you anymore either.
And she told my mom about the moving in comment, that it was just because she didn't want their large dogs to shred my small dog, or anything worse, because she would feel horrible (I don't believe this for a second, it was another convenient excuse). My mom looked at her and asked if she was serious, because I never would have brought my dog over there. Again, because of how happy she is with her sister. The fiance actually looked shocked at this information, indicating that my brother was up to his old lying was again.
Speaking of my brother, apparently he told my parents that he would never come over here again as long as I live here. And honestly? That's fine with me. I don't want him in this house. I am agoraphobic and my home is like a sanctuary. My mom and I were talking about how ridiculous this all is and how entitled they are, and I mention that it occurred to me that they were suddenly invested in being a family now that she's pregnant and definitely getting married (and after she won't speak to her family) and I wouldn't be surprised if they only told us and played the 'family' card because they had expected me to be my normal gentle and loving self. That it seemed convenient, and I couldn't help but think they had only allowed us in on the news expecting a baby shower gift or wedding gift. Or for me to arrange the baby shower-- Fiance doesn't have a sister, isn't talking to her mom, and doesn't have that many female friends (shocker). My mom sighed and said it wouldn't surprise her either if they had expected me to be their baby sitter for the same reason, just like I took care of his dog because I couldn't refuse it with my soft heart. And honestly, I had thought that too, but I dismissed the thought because it seemed too much like they would consider me for that. But my mom had the same idea, so it couldn't be that far off.
She told me she had reached out to my brother one last time, after the initial fight, after she had comforted me from the violent sobbing and saw just how much it hurt. The gist was just 'you should really apologize to your sister, all she ever really wanted from you was for you to acknowledge her as part of your life. our family is small, and it hurts to see you two like this. All it takes is an invite to hang out now and again, that's all she wants. I hope you can figure this out. Enjoy the rest of your weekend, I love you'.
My brother's response was 'I am not handling this situation right now'.
And it really hit me. He wasn't willing to do the bare minimum of an apology and spending any time with me at all. I laughed bitterly and told my mom he probably thinks that by the time his birthday rolls around I'll feel bad and come back to him-- He'll have a nasty surprise coming.
I'm pretty sure I'm not the asshole here. But between my anxiety, my hurt, and just the long history of me forgiving my brother because I love him, I keep wondering if maybe I shouldn't have. I go back and forth between thinking that I was wrong and that I was just showing off my shiny new backbone.
So, AITA for cutting contact with my brother and his pregnant fiance?

User can summon technology similar to shikigami, specifically things like a cellphone, laptop, cables, speakers, headphones, etc. Most of these tools can gloat alongside the user and also function as their actual Irl counterparts.
Ce trait- the user of this technique has a pixely shaped ce, which gives the user enhanced Ce manipulation and makes their Ce sharper in multiple places.
Extension techniques:
Cellphone- the cellphone can do things like take pictures and "cut" inanimate objects (without cursed energy) in order to later "paste" it back into reality for a variety of affect, these objects can also be "copied" so that it can be re-used, however if its copied and used too much it can glitch which can deconstruct the object and inevitably cause damage to the phone slowing it down indefinitely. The phone can also use the camera to create flashes to disorient the enemy, or compress the flash into a ce blast of energy. The phone floats alongside the user when they want it too. The phone also has an Ai that powers it, its much more advanced than current Ai as it can not only answer most questions easily (having access to the internet) but also has its own emotions and feelings surrounding the user, formulating complex thoughts and emotions on its own and even keeping up conversations like you're best friends would ( this is 100% a coding mistake the user made that cannot be fixed, don't worry though the Ai is funny) the Ai is called sam and bases its self off of people on the internet, it comes off as extremely condescending and sarcastic but can be sweet and caring when the moment presents itself, she is also the basis of all of the technique, since she inhabits all of the technology the user creates.
Tablet- the tablet can take the photos from the phone in order to "edit" them causing their overall shapes, parameters, and even density or points to be completely different, however the more different an object is from its original the more Ce inefficient it is, and it can also cause glitches over time. The tabled floats alongside the user when they want it too.
Laptop- the laptop can create codes for different photos or codes just in general. The coded photos can add effects and change more conceptual things such as weight, density, instability, etc. Raw codes can do a variety of things, like creating new technology based shikigami with varying abilities, changing Irl things such as objects temperatures or how they react to other objects, and if the user miss-codes something it 100% ends in a glitch and eventually implodes on itself. The laptop can sort of float, it more just stays still whe placed somewhere but doesn't move independently.
Cables- the user cam summon different kinds of cables for different thing or to connect his devices to each other or other things. These cables can first conduct Ce and convert it into electrical energy (still cursed) which can charge his devices or be used to attack. Next these cords can connect to inanimate objects to steal their code or manipulate it for different effects, it can also steal somethings base code in order to glitch it. The cables cannot float ok their own, however they can stay suspended when the user needs it.
Headphones- they act as basic headphones, but they can also connect to other people's subconscious as a form of telepathy (has to be consentful on both parties). The headphones cannot float. (because why would they need too?)
Portable projector- the user summons a small speaker sized projector that has the ability to project a barrier that's size is dependent on the amount of cursed energy put into it, the strength of the barrier is also dependent on Ce output. These projections have no shapes other than square but it can still have other stuff projected in order to confuse the opponent. The projector floats alongside the user and can be sent somewhere else or stay put.
Printer- the user summons an average sized printer that has no abilities on its own and is one of the only tools that can't float, however when paired with the computer it can either print out stock images or saved images on paper almost instantly, these images become the real thing after the paper leaves the users hand, theses objects don't stay solid forever and are very size dependent (if its smaller it stays longer and vice versa) and the objects couldn't really pass as the real thing since they'll usually look blocky or can be missing textures or colors.
Portable charger- this is more of a personal tool which the user can store Ce for later use into, however it can also turn that Ce into electricity either for the users combat or to actually charge the tools. This tool can float alongside the user.
Maximum technique:
Complete system- the user summons a computer monitor, keyboard, mouse, pc, and speakers (they are all floating about standing level to the user). After this the user can either stand at the computer and use the technique which gives him minimal control over the surrounding area (think the op op no mi from one piece but less powerful) in this area the user controls all non cursed inanimate objects, he can edit their composition, weight, shape, etc. He doesn't gain 100%control over things and glitches are more common here. For the other maximum he has to put his phone onto the keyboard and say "autopilot" which creates a robotic armor for sam, the armor itself is about 7'0 with a very wide build (almost like a transformer) the robot is comprised 100% of technology such as car parts, computers, speakers, etc which gives sam an extreme array of abilities, however the user is limited to just his Ce and anything sam doesn't use (probably just cables and portable charger).
Domain expansion: World wide web- the domain puts all people in it, within a desktop computer, this includes an interactive background (its random every time) a cursor, apps, and setting on the bottom. The sure hit of this domain is that sam becomes a litteral entity made of pure energy, in this form she has just as much control of the domain as the user of this domain, other than that there is no sure hit, but the cursor can be used to click(attack), drag(throw), and edit(look at/slightly alter stats) while they are still. Apps can also be opened which can lead to an array of even more possibilities (going to YouTube and watching a video to disorient the enemy, going to Twitter to make them immediately upset, or going to reddit to cause a numerous amount of possible affects).
Other info:
Glitches/viruses- if the user messed up/overuses/or gain some sort of penalty via technique, then a glitch or virus is created. A glitch/virus can come in multiple forms either being an error in programming that depending on the amount of error can either just stop something from working or full on implode it, they can also show up as living entities that vary in size but are always a purple electric monster that corrupts whatever it makes contact with (the corruption either continues to spread or stops after a while and it doesn't affect living or cursed objects) the viruses are also extremely hostile and attack any living thing they can find including the user, however they are rarely a real threat as they are usually dealt with similar to curses, but they have been able to become special grade relative before (even developing an anti program of sort that acts as a technique).
Programs- programs in a way can act as binding vows with less rules, they can cause a multitude of effects, like loss or gain in Ce, enhanced attributes, or even entirely different effects, however they also act as litteral programs which means if there is even a slight error in its program it can shut down or stop working entirely (this can come in handy sometimes by freezing objects in place for a short period of time)
Binding vows:
Autopilot- by saying autopilot the user gives sam complete access to their technique, this allows sam to do whatever she wants with any of the technology for about an hour, this vow also enhances the uses Ce output by 50% since he's essentially losing his technique for a given time.
Power off- by turning the power off on all his devices he gains a 100% boost in overall stats and Ce
Combo breaker- the user can activate a video game esk ability by saying "power up" within the 15 minutes time limit the user gains a garunteed black flash, given they can hit the enemy 15 times before they can hit him, this ability can backfire because his enemy gains the same effect, this can either be a make or break situation depending on how you look at it (these black flashed are also about 2X power instead of 2.5X to make it more even.
Extra:

• this ability was made to be overpowered so don't come at me for it.
• i have no OC to go along with this technique (however i did have some Canon thoughts for its eventual user) -if you wanna use it thats fine just ask pls
• if there are any thoughts/ ideas/ queries/ questions/ inquiries/ extra abilities or tidbits/ anything if the such i would live to hear it!!!

Hear me out here. Just as a refresher, here is the statement that came out when the review got made:
https://resources.saints.com.au/aflc-stk/document/2022/11/11/113e6d5a-b757-4071-b344-c9f6d6f53bb9/221111-Review.pdf
I decided to read over it again and a few things have stood out that have me really concerned.
Did we blatantly ignore/forget about our external review 12 months ago?
So here are some quotes and my thoughts below them. Quotes taken directly from the review linked above.

Moving forward, we are determined to focus much more on building the team, gameplan and culture to contend over time, even if this does make the short-term more difficult for us. To do this, we agreed that we needed to ensure that we had the right personnel in key roles

Brett Ratten was sacked, with Ross Lyon named as head coach 10 days later. Ross was then given keys to the castle, brought in a spate of his own assistant coaches, recruiting coaches, performance coaches etc.
How have we ensured we did bring the right people in place? Where was the vetting process for these roles?
​

One of the hallmarks of any successful organisation, sporting or otherwise, is open and honest feedback loops throughout the organisation and strong robust debate leading to sound decision making.

How do we have an open and honest feedback loop when Ross Lyon has brought in all of his own people under his command? Even our head of football was recruited by him into the club. That's like an employee recruiting their boss. Hell, our new CEO was one of Ross Lyon's teammates back when they played for Fitzroy.
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Given the size of the challenge in front of the Club to implement the findings of the Review, it was seen as critical to have a single point of accountability and an experienced operator for our Head of Football.

How is a high performance coach an experienced operator for the entire football operation? Again, another person recruited by Ross Lyon as one of his subjects. I don't see a world in where Misson is telling Lyon what to do.
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In our Football Program, we had seen encouraging signs of improvement through 2020, an injury-cruelled 2021 season and the first half of the 2022 season. But our performances post the bye this year made it much harder to make the case that we were making sufficient progress in our football journey
...
The Review also identified significant issues in relation to our Coaching Program, which explained in part the inconsistency seen on-field over the past two seasons

They took a 10 week period of football to sack Ratten without a thought despite a horrid 18 month injury list and replaced him with no vetting process, yet Ross Lyon has now essentially lost 7 games in 10 weeks with one of those wins scraping over 17th placed Richmond while having a mostly healthy list.
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The Board and President could do more at times to challenge and question the direction of the Football Department, as is the role of the governing body

Now impossible with the recruitment of Carl Dilena, one of Ross Lyon's friends back in his Fitzroy playing days and the head of football one of Lyon's proteges.
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The Management team could do more at times to ensure a better flow of information and greater openness to debate

Not sure how there's openness to debate when the entire department was recruited by Lyon to implement his game plan.
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We recognised that we needed more revolutionary change than originally intended, to ensure that we are building towards a culture of sustained success.

Ross Lyon has never had success, nor has his winning periods been sustained. Why did we believe he was the one to fix this?
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Identify and recruit an experienced Head of Football

This is Misson's first ever stint as a Head of Football
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Improve the leadership and capacity of the Coaching group.

Goddard is coaching our midfield after one season of experience as an U18's coach. Lenny Hayes has stepped back from the club and spends less time than anyone else there. Our game plan and ball movement has collapsed completely despite a nearly perfect healthy list.
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continuing to enforce and demand higher standards and clearer non-negotiables

It seems like players have gone backwards. Where are the results of the higher standards? How about the clear non-negotiables with Lyon playing favourites with list selection?
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The implementation of these recommendations will be the responsibility of the new leadership in the Football Department, overseen by the CEO, reporting to the Board.

The head of football is now Misson, recruited by Ross Lyon. The CEO is now Carl Dilena, a former teammate of Ross Lyon.
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The template of the Review – open, transparent and accountable – sets the standard for our governance going forward.

All we've gotten as to why our form has slipped so horribly is excuses from the coach at the end of every loss. Travel, fixture, runners etc.
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While these appointments are an important step forward, we must also commit ourselves, across all levels of the Club, to hard work and hold ourselves to uncompromising standards if we are to see through the vision outlined in this Review

Those standards aready fell when Ross Lyon's protege was elected as Head of Football.
​

About 2 months ago I (20M) went on a date with this coworker (21F) who I met after recently working at a new restaurant. I then tried to set up a second date and while she verbally agreed and we scheduled a day, she never responded to my text trying to specify details until the day after we scheduled (about 4 days of silence).
Her text was a steaming pile of disingenuous bs about how she had no service when she saw my text and then forgot to respond. She followed that by saying that she wasn’t interested in dating but “really enjoys talking to me”.
So I was obviously upset, but I knew that I couldn’t take the situation too deep or I’d look like a butthurt little baby being passive aggressive towards her. So I come into work the day after she texts me all that bs, and this girl has the AUDACITY to act flirty with me, continuously try to strike up convos and enter into my field of vision. At one point she even grabbed something off a table that I was like, directly in front of. I mean like this girl took her hand and had it less than a foot away from my crotch. Didn’t ask me to move out of the way, just totally broke my personal space. Annoying as fuck. I didn’t say anything but gave her a blank stare trying to communicate to stop acting weird.
By this point I haven’t been anything but cordial with her, but she then took it another step further the next day. She called me “baby” in passing and at first I didn’t think much of it since it’s common vernacular for women, but when she then called me “babe” about an hour after I couldn’t handle it. I walked up to her and I said in a very calm tone “Not trying to be an ahole, just don’t use the baby word”. She awkwardly laughed and that was that.
By this point I had begun to ignore her as she was in my mind acting super socially inept and inconsiderate. But after two weeks of avoidance I begin to be more cordial, asking for help and offering help as well.
This is the part of the story where I legitimately lose all respect for this girl. I was standing at a device punching in an order for a table and this girl walks up to me and for five seconds just stared directly at me with puppy dog eyes. She was standing less than 5 feet from me. I never acknowledge her and walk off.
My reason for being upset here is because her actions seem to reflect a basic lack of respect for me and my feelings regarding the situation. It felt objectifying to have this girl just play games with me after ghosting me for a date. After that I ignored her for another two weeks.
I then do some meditation on the ordeal and feel as though the only way to remedy the situation is to just have an open and honest conversation. So I text her apologizing for my avoidance and propose to talk about the whole situation. She agrees.
I then talk to her later that day after our shift and basically explain to her that the reason as to why I was avoiding her was because she was disingenuous in her response to ghosting me for the date and that she was playing games after the fact. She admitted to lying about the lack of response, but chalked the whole “playing games” thing to awkwardness. I never went into specifics about the games she was playing (the puppy dog eyes and the flirty behavior) as I didn’t want the conversation to feel like an interrogation, but in retrospect I should have. I just said “ok” and then ended the conversation unfulfilled. I walked away thinking that she literally thought I was stupid and didn’t think I had any self respect.
So I text her a couple of days after our convo and basically tell her that I was unsettled by her explanations. She never responded as the text was pretty confrontation, still respectful but pretty asserting.
This all leads to a couple of days ago (about 2 weeks after our conversation) when I confront her on the fact that she was playing games and that I wasn’t stupid. I tell her about the puppy dog eyes situation and she acted like she had no idea what I was talking about. So I just roll my eyes at her and tell her that I don’t think she’s being honest.
And now I’m here on reddit.
I have tried literally everything to make this situation right, but I can not tolerate disrespect or inauthenticity. Life is too short to be surrounded by that kind of character flaw.
I should mention that most of my coworkers resent the hell out of me for my behavior, and while I’ve never directly talked to any of them about the situation it’s quite clear that a bunch of them switched up on me when they learned about everything from her perspective. I come into work and have to deal with roughly 5 passive aggressive woman in their early twenties on a consistent basis. I’d be lying if I said that it didn’t bother me.
Obviously I’m pretty worked up, but am I wrong?
And most importantly, what do I do from here?

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***Apologies ahead of time for the lengthy read...
Hi All - I am looking for some advice/thoughts on what I should do given my current work situation. A little bit about myself I am a 38m Advertising/Marketing creative professional who has been in the industry for over 15 years now. Started in the NY ad world and grinded it out there working for big consumer brands, winning awards and spending most of my days and nights working on pitches or on set. Then my wife and I had our daughter and of course just like any sane person (hopefully) I didn't want to work 80-90 weeks anymore out of a broom closet (literally).
Since then I have been working for smaller agencies/marketing firms in senioexecutive level positions helping these organizations grow their internal creative departments based on business needs and bring in new clients.
When the pandemic hit I was working remotely for a communications agency doing what I stated above, but after 2 1/2 years I felt like I hit a ceiling both creatively and professionally and decided to move on. Fast forward to where I am now. I currently work for a global non-profit (remotely) managing the creative team (around 12 people) as part of our "marketing and communications" department.
Before I started there was the usual selling point of "carving my own path" and "getting out what I put in" deal, IE "everyday there will be something dysfunctional and new" and "do good work, get rewarded with even more work". Which okay that's fine every company has different selling points on how they try to get you to work there and I also have heard stories about wearing many many different hats especially with a non-profit environment, so I knew what I was signing up for. I also took a pay cut and title reduction because I wanted to try something new and really felt that there was room to grow. At the end of the day I was more concerned about being a good manager for my team, creating better processes, innovate where we could, and create a higher standard/quality of work that everyone could be proud of and really push the organization forward.
Everything started out normal as any new job does. Everyone is nice to you, everyone seems competent in their roles and everything seems to be working as it should. Well for anyone who has been 3+ years of general work experience in any environment knows that after a couple of months that honeymoon period starts to wear off and you start to see the cracks in the sidewalk.
This is where my story starts (told ya it was going to be a long one). The first couple of months I do what I do at every job and kind of go on a listening tour with my team and other people within the company to get a sense of where everyone's priorities were and get better context to what happened previous to me coming in. While I was doing this my boss seemed competent enough at the time to understand the things that I was telling her that needed to get fixed/updated, where the challenges were and how we were going to move past them.
To start I put together a couple of decks that consisted of a new department structure/recommendation, SOP (standard operating procedures) + Process document, and even an annual plan for the rest of the FY with a roadmap of all of the tactics, initiatives and tent pole moments that we would be heavily involved in from the marketing/creative side. She seemed receptive to many of the ideas and was happy that I knew what I was talking about so she took the documents and we didn't really speak about them for the next couple of months. Over those few months there were new projects/initiatives coming in that were piling up for the team, so I took it upon myself (while still reminding her that I needed some form of approval) to just implement the changes I recommended.
Fast FWD 8 months, the team is knee deep in projects (more projects than we have ever had because everyone internally were using outside vendors, because they originally did not want work with our department/my boss). Everyone on the creative team was happy with how projects were being executed, they felt empowered by letting them try new things they weren't able to do before and everyone actually feels like there was some semblance of order to how we do the work and ultimately our internal stakeholders who are requesting these projects were very happy with the results/outcomes.
During those 8 months, the conversations around projects and all of the documentation I provided originally was pushed off, my boss rarely ever came to status calls, kick off calls or even just meetings that we both should have been in attendance for. It literally felt like she just took an 8 month vacation and when she checked in with me, she would not ask me what's the status of jobs a, b and c. She was always frame the questions as "if someone asked you this, what would you say?" or "what are your thoughts about doing this, and how would you execute that?".
It got to the point where I had to have multiple conversations with her to say "I don't feel like I am getting the support I need and your other direct report is also radio silent I need you to talk to her so we can actually work together as a team". Well after about 6-8x of having this conversation I went to her boss and had a 2 hour conversation with him about how she has been MIA for the last 8 months+, I have been doing her job and her other direct report is also non responsive (which I will get to some more background context later on both of them).
He said I hear you and will do something about it. After I had that conversation with him, my boss immediately asks for a 1:1 and essentially says to be if I go to her boss again about these things I said that it would be "a different conversation", mind you I also told her on that call AGAIN everything she was NOT doing and gave definitive answers and showed the receipts of everything I was doing to carry the department.
After that conversation happened my life has been a living hell. For the past 5-6months she has been documenting every conversation we have had together (which I have as well), overstepping and bottle necking every projects myself and my team are working on, and undermining me around every corner on full team calls.
Since I had that last conversation with her boss I have had multiple conversations with him and HR and other executive team members about her behavior, her lack of professionalism and tbh her lack of knowledge/skill to even do her job.
I have tried multiple times to come to the table with viable solutions like just splitting us off of the department so we can operate solo, among other options - and it even got to the point where exec team members have asked me do we even need her, and I have said "no". They're very aware of her past behavior but I do not think to the degree/detail in which I have told them in the last several months.
To give that background context I was talking about earlier - the story goes that she was hired by another really terrible/unskilled leader (who was fired for stealing from the company and just being a terrible person) and it kind of just multiplied like bunnies from there. Before I came into the org no one wanted to work with her or her other direct report that I spoke about earlier, because they were rude, unprofessional and just plain mean. So the department at the time just became a vendor management team essentially. The only reason she has been her for so long is because it's a non profit and it's just too hard to really track the core source of where things come from whether it's good or bad. So she crafted her entire "professional career" off the backs of people below her who ended up leaving because of her and now she's just been able to fly under the radar until now.
Last I heard through the grapevine - a couple of weeks ago there were plans to fire her and move me into her position, but like any organization all changes move at a snails pace. We also recently got a new CEO, and he seems very smart, observant in a no BS kind of way which is good - he has already commented on how we do not have any good marketing in it's current form and something needs to be done.
At this point in time I have built up a great reputation with our internal and external stakeholders, I'd like to think that people enjoy working with me based on the feedback I have heard and everyone is happy with my work product/output and has been mentioned many many times to the exec team and HR without and prompting (from what I hear).
All that to say presently I have resigned myself to just doing the bare minimum because I feel like I am in a damned if I do damned if I don't type of situation - it's very apparent that my boss notices and hears the positive things myself and the team are doing and is already very self conscious about her ability to do her job, so she tries pull me into these "gotcha" moments on team calls and other project meetings to maintain control/power.
At the end of the day it's less about taking her job and getting "promoted" and it's more about my teams mental health, happiness and professional development.
My question to everyone is; do I believe the conversations I have been having and wait and see if something is really going to happen to her? or do I just say F it and really push down the gas on my already active job search? have any of you ever been in this position? it's mentally vexing and I really think if she was gone we'd really be able to do great things and innovate the way we are suppose to for our stakeholders + I really like my team.
Any advice would be helpful and happy to give clarity and answer any questions, thank you!
TL:DR - I started a new job, made some great changes and created some great work, my boss was MIA for 8 months, have been doing her job since then - when she found out I was not happy about it through multiple conversations with her then escalated to her boss after she did not listen - she threatened to fire me, and now I am waiting for my company to do something about her based on my situation + her bad track record/inability to actually do her job.