Obviously I know no one can diagnose on here, but I think my son has ARFID. He is young (under 12) and has been extremely picky ever since he was a toddler. He has a solid amount of safe foods but there’s always rules to how he must eat them.
Examples:
Burgers and fries—plain burger patty, no bun. No sauces. Just a meat patty
Chicken nuggets—only popcorn chicken style from certain places
Won’t eat sandwiches
Won’t eat sauces
Can’t eat pizza—tries to at birthday parties but the sauce freaks him out
Buttered pasta with salt only. I tried putting a little pepper on it and he wigged out.
He sometimes gets grossed out by other people eating and the cleanliness of the area he is in.
Has a visceral reaction and gags to trying new foods that he is scared of/knows he isn’t going to like
Wont eat if he is hungry if there aren’t any of his safe foods around
I’ve tried to explain to him that even if something isn’t like a 10/10 awesome meal but it is OK and good enough, that he needs to eat it anyways. Not every meal will blow you away every time.
I think it’s ARFID—anxiety and sensory based. Not restricting due to weight. I have a meeting with his pediatrician next week to discuss treatment.

Me and my friends are looking forward to eat exotic foods in Pampanga and we booked a place in Angeles for our weekend getaway. During our search, we found many restaurants who serve exotic food (like betute and kamaru) but some really have bad reviews. Asking locals for recommendations where to eat for lunch and dinner! Also where to find sisig place that isn't overpriced?

After my first breakup and the endless pain it caused, I thought I could handle anything. A few years back, I even received a diagnosis for ulcerative colitis and managed to cope with the diagnosis and the ongoing suffering. After five years, I opened my heart to another woman.
Two years later, it happened. She met a guy online. I didn't think much of it because men and women can be friends (though it's tough, but possible). He even had a girlfriend, so I wasn't overly worried. After meeting him a few times, she went on a university trip to Switzerland and came back a changed person. She wanted to spend the night at her mom’s, which was fine by me. She said she'd text me when she got there—it’s a 30-minute trip. Five hours later, she suddenly returned home. I was terrified, thinking she had died or something else horrible had happened. When she got home, she said she'd been out drinking with a friend, and we went to sleep because I was too exhausted to discuss anything. The next day, I demanded to see her phone because I didn't believe her (after she didn’t even notify me about her plans), but she refused. Long story short, she had been with Julian, the guy from the cinema. They had gone to watch the northern lights and had some drinks. I pressed her, unable to understand how she could keep this from me. Since she struggles with emotional stress, she confessed that she had kissed my best friend a few months back. After further arguing, she admitted it happened twice more, once at our place.
I told her straight away that we could get through this, and we discussed why it happened. She hadn't felt emotionally secure with me, and I see that now. Yes, it wasn't my fault she strayed, but I hadn't treated her as well as she treated me for the longest time. I wasn't terrible, but I hadn't made her my top priority, and she felt it. She had told me several times how important it was, but she never conveyed just how serious the situation was. We decided to try again, and she agreed to stop seeing Julian for some time (she didn't want to stop texting him because she finds it incredibly hard to make friends and didn’t want to lose that—she said she'd stop if she felt something romantic could happen).
Why didn't I treat her better? I can't tell you. Maybe my illnesses stressed me out! Maybe it was university, which has never stressed me so much, that kept me from paying enough attention to my girlfriend. I just didn't realize how serious it was.
A few days ago, my girlfriend decided to take a break from me to clear her thoughts and find out if she can still love me.
And then, as if things couldn't get worse: in two days, she was supposed to start a month-long break, and just now, she wrote to me that Julian's girlfriend had broken up with him, just as I had predicted.
My disease has flared up again due to stress, and it's the most important university semester of my life, but I can't go on because I JUST CAN'T ANYMORE.
Perfectly timed with our break starting, Julian's girlfriend broke up with him. I don't know what to do with myself. I love my girlfriend, even after everything, and I don't want to lose her. But after everything, especially this last part, I feel like I know where this is going. I just can't deal with it. I can't watch TV shows, I can't eat, and most of the time, I can't even cry. The only thing keeping me going is the hope that nothing happens with Julian this month and she comes back to me, so I can show her that she is my number one priority (alongside my own well-being). And I've never meant anything so seriously.
I don't know what to do with myself. I want to tell her to cut off contact with Julian, but she won't; I want to tell her to stay with me, but she won’t. And when I express my fear that she might develop feelings for Julian during the break, she tells me she can't imagine that happening.
I don't know what to do anymore. Thank you for reading this far. Writing is the only thing I can do right now.
I feel like I barely exist these days, especially now. I’ve thought about hurting myself, but I won’t. I know I won't end my life, and I won't harm myself. I can't imagine how terrible the next months will be, but I have to survive somehow, even though I feel I may never be happy again.
So... I don't know what I'm expecting from this... Advice? I Quess. I can't imagine anyone can help. I still have to try everything.
**TL;DR;** : My girlfriend cheated and wasnt happy in the relationship and i need help, advice.. anything.

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WHOOOOO, A WEEK. I feel nice, liberated and amazing. I have more energy and more motivation do to BETTER. This better thing is from a youtube short that i watched where i guy tossed pizza very skillfully and kept saying better better. Pretty funny.
I read some posts where people are like damn i can't quit and shit. JUST QUIT. Or get a girl. if ur like, but how to get a girl, that's simple. Girls hang around in groups and very difficult to approach as they are with friends. So go in safe, comfortable places. Gym is a good place but you have to find a good moment, not in between sets. When she is taking a break and drinking water, just say excuse me can i get a water, then she moves and u get water. this will slowly turn into excuse me can you please spot me, then start going to the gym in her time exchange number, call her to ask if she is coming to the gym, then slowly slowly build up courage and ask her out for a coffee/tea/anything to eat in a crowded place. If you can't do that here are other options:
1) school/college
2) Workplace
3) tindebumble/grindr
4) be a playboy. just ask out any random girl. if you ask 100 girls, the probability of 1 saying ya sure, is very very less, but if ur a bit handsome(which we know u arnt otherwise why wud be be reading, it's ok don't feel bad, im not handsome either) u can do it

Whether you're a local resident or planning a visit to Lusaka, explorelusaka.com is your ultimate guide to everything the vibrant capital of Zambia has to offer.

• Things to see & do: Detailed info on top attractions and hidden gems.
• Where to eat: Insider advice on the best places to eat, shop, and party.
• What's on: Stay updated on concerts, festivals, and more.
• Where to stay: Reviews of hotels and guesthouses for every budget.

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"Y'know why I love the internet? Because it's just like me." "Vulgar, combative, and contradictory?" "Overflowing with perversion and stupidity?" "Yes, and yes."
In 2013, Deadpool wanted a game, and gave a director at High Moon Studios his proposal written in the finest crayon he could muster. They accepted it (after being blown up following the initial rejection). As such, Deadpool finds himself trying to bring in the bounty on generic hateable villain Chance White, only for him to be rescued by the Marauders and killed by Mister Sinister. Driven by a desire for revenge (all while ignoring the X-Men and Cable's various attempts to get him to help save the world), Deadpool travels across Genosha in order to kill the supervillain.

Strength

• Kicks a large sewer grate free when said grate had just been unaffected by him sliding into it
• Sends a group of private soldiers flying back into walls with a spin kick
• Hits an explosive barrel away a distance
• Cuts off a person's head and arms
• Pushes a large block
• Pries open a large set of elevator doors by a penthouse
• Controls a mounted machine gun with one hand which most people require two to fire

Durability

Healing Factor

• After a short period of not taking damage, Deadpool's health rapidly refills to full
• His healing factor causes a person to believe that all his guards are constantly missing Deadpool with their gunfire
• Doesn't notice he's been impaled by rebar after coming conscious, and then pulls himself free
• Was once stabbed in the heart by Wolverine
• Shoots himself in the head, and comes back to consciousness later with a knife stabbed into his chest
• Falls from a Sentinel foot onto concrete, twisting his head around cutting an arm off, and he needs to stagger around to collect his arm, put it in place so it can instantly attach, before twisting his head back the right way around
• Bisected at the waist, being held in midair by his intestine and continuing to fight after falling on top of a man's head
  • Deadpool ultimately bleeds out, meeting Death, but soon recovers and gets back up
• Is torn apart and beheaded by Mister Sinister, falling unconscious, and when he wakes up his body is reattached (though the X-Men may have placed his body back together)
• Cannot get drunk

Gameplay

• Doesn't take fall damage
• Takes hits from a clone of Blockbuster, who tears up large chunks of stone or concrete ground before throwing it
• Takes hits from Arclight (who may or may not be a clone), who jump punches a large platform in a sewer to break it into the ground before doing so again to send it into freefall
• Has grenades explode by him
• Shot by a launched rocket
• Tanks electric attacks

Other

• Punched back a distance by Cable
• Fine after crashing his bike into a wall which had just launched him across Genosha
• Blasted back from an explosive shot destroying a door
• Sent flying from the explosion of a large piece of debris slamming into the tower he's on
• Walks out of a Blackbird crash which knocked out Wolverine, Rogue, and Psylocke
• Knocked back by an attack's shockwave
• Filled with electricity as he connects two large severed wires to open a door

Speed

• Aims and shoots at regular speed in a slow-mo sequence

Weapons

Deadpool is shown as owning a large range of weapons. Highlighted below are the ones he uses in-game.
Melee

• Beauroyre blades
• *Bang Lee* sais
• K-SOH 20lb. hammers
  • Can be imbued with flame as part of an attack

Firearms

• DT 1981S pistols
• Nuthals 220S submachine guns
• Kingmaker shotguns
• Harrison PLS pulse rifles, which are strong enough to turn foes into blood smears

Explosives

• Frag grenades capable of blowing a home in the ground beneath Deadpool while bisecting him
• Carries C4, with one package blowing up the sewer ceiling, the wall to the bathroom above, and blasts a person walking away a notable distance
  • Has a lot of C4
• Rigs explosives at a game studio that he sets off from his apartment in order to convince them to make a game about him

Other

• Flashbangs
• Bear traps

Teleportation

• Can teleport short distances
  • This later gets upgraded to cover longer distances
• Teleports into a helicopter to commandeer its gun
• Brings Deadpool back to the platform he jumped off of when he falls
• Teleports around Genosha to set up a plan

Fourth Wall Awareness

Medium Awareness

• Starts the game by bombing the studio that made the game in order to have them make the game
  • Due to the game being actively developed as it's played, sections running over budget can cause Deadpool to have to go through cheaper areas for a period, such as a retro Zelda-like section
  • When a section isn't finished, he sends the developers more money so they can fix it
• Sees two achievements he earns right at the start of the game
• Receives the script for his game before editing it in crayon and showing it to the player
• Notes his controls have been reversed after his head had been twisted backwards

Object Conjuration

• Commands goons to spawn in the tutorial
• Spawns in a crate containing a bouncy castle
• Brings in a coin operated rocket for him to sadly ride while Cable monologues
• Gives himself a woman on either leg, lightning to strike his sword, and fireworks in the sky before having the credits roll
• One section is filled in front of a live studio audience, somehow

Other

• Stretches a censor bar
• Creates a bridge of thought bubbles to traverse an area
• Begs the player to get him out of Cable's boring monologue
• Uses a C4 trigger to replay the level he just went through, greatly draining the game's budget

Intelligence

• Controls Sentinel arms through loose wires
• Uses control panels at the top of a tower to shock a Mister Sinister clone, possibly play music (though this may be an aspect of the game), and ultimately destroy his plans
• At the end of the tutorial, spawns in a bouncy castle which he later falls onto alongside the person he's capturing so that he survives dropping out of the top of a skyscraper
• Has Cable assist him in modifying a Sentinel foot to launch him across Genosha
• Spray paints an X on the ground before the final battle which ends up being the location Mister Sinister stands on where he's squashed by a flying Sentinel foot
• Modifies a bike so it's rocket powered and can launch him across Genosha, then drops some C4 at a pre-set location so to knock down a Sentinel hand, propelling a crate with a greeting message and two more C4 packets onto the other side of a ravine, before that C4 explodes to knock down a statue and make a bridge for several X-Men

Other

• Cannot die
  • He can near death experiences in some circumstances, such as while bleeding out due to being bisected, but soon gets brought back to reality
• Can double jump and wall jump
• Eats through his mask
• Is capable of becoming briefly invincible with an upgrade
• The two voices in his head may not share the same knowledge as Deadpool, though they may also just be different aspects of his personality that focus on different things
• When Rogue absorbs Deadpool's healing factor, she also gains his personality, fighting ability, and the two voices from his head

“This book is on voyages to the North, where Lord Debling intends to travel.”
“Miss Featherington, are you reading about the fabled Northwest Passage?”
(S3 E4 11:16)
Hi everyone! I posted a comment about it right after season 3 dropped, and I have seen a bit of interest in the Northwest Passage on here recently. I thought that for those of you who didn’t learn about it extensively in school in the small corner of Canada that I did, I’d put together a little informative post on the extremely brief (and perhaps even inconsequential!) reference to the Northwest Passage in Episode 4. I’ll provide an overview of the Passage and its history, touch on some characteristics of travel to this region, and conclude with some completely speculative comments on the literary purpose of evoking the passage in this scene in Season 4.
Also, full credit to the other NWP enthusiasts who have been making posts about this and discussing it in other threads.
A quick note on the colonial nature of this post: Throughout this short post, I refer to several colonial expeditions to the land many of us call Canada. Although I attempt to be cognizant of my language, it is important to note that the Inuit people who live in the arctic regions that I reference have navigated the sea ice for thousands of years (Panikkar et al., 2018) and that the written history of this region are often hegemonic and euro-centric narratives that were formed within colonial frameworks.
More information on the Inuit and their culture, language, and traditions can be found here: https://www.itk.ca/about-canadian-inuit/
References are at the end. If you like this post, you might also like the speculative post I made about the influences of the Eros/Psyche quote in the which is also endless academic yapping.
Exploring the Northwest Passage- a bit of context
In August of 1820, Lieutenant Edward Parry, a member of the British Royal Navy observed the dense ice and snow of arctic land and sea that was thought to be the location of the mysterious Northwest Passage. From a simple look, he knew that no ship in existence would be able to pass through ice sheets of such a great thickness and that extended for such a long distance (Brandt, 2011). Despite his pessimism, by Parry’s time, British sailors and explorers had been explicitly seeking the passage for hundreds of years (Williams & Costley, 2010; Day, 2006, p. xxiv), dreaming of exploiting the desirable economic prospect of a Western route from Europe to burgeoning Asian markets.
First encounters: When European sailors first encountered North America, it was in pursuit of a route west to Asia. They were, of course, incorrect about the location of Asia. And although a great deal of interest shifted to mapping the new continent, there was also an acknowledgement that there would be great economic benefits to finding a way around this newly encountered landmass (Day, 2006). Over time, the reasons and methods of locating the Northwest Passage changed and evolved, but interest never truly went away.
Renewed British interest: Notably, at the end of the 15^th century, when the Ottoman Turk’s empire extended into the Mediterranean and eastward, European merchants were no longer allowed to move and trade freely (Day, 2006). Seeking new routes for the Pacific, European (and especially British) explorers turned West. The Northwest Passage was a concept, a theoretical possibility, for European explorers. It was seen as a potential commercial sea route to the trading markets that were already established and burgeoning in Asia. The Passage was a route with phenomenal economic potential, especially as European consumers sought spices, materials, salts, and woods from foreign markets (Williams & Costley, 2010).
Based on their knowledge of the Southern Hemisphere and the potential geography of the world, many believed that a similar passage would be reflected in the earth’s northern pole (Day, 2006). As a result, there was a massive potential for financial gain for colonial governments and individuals, should such a passage ever be found.
Public fascination: The passage became a point of national fascination for many members of the public. In pursuit of this fascination, many enthusiastic researchers “persuaded persons of influence and wealth to send out discovery expeditions” (Williams & Costley, 2010, p. xv). With governments in Europe stabilizing, the emergence of an economy of cheap labour (lower class men who were willing to take on the dangerous work at sea), and the rapid development of ship technology, the 1600s was a prime time to set out on expeditions.
The fascination with the Passage continued for 300 years until a passage was finally navigated by sea in full in the 1900s. Over the course of history, Anthony Brandt describes the fascination with the Passage’s discovery as a tragedy (2011). He writes: “hubris, an all-too-human arrogance and pride that triggered a particular calamity” (p. 5) as being the tragedy of the exploration for the Passage. Despite the fascination of the public with it, the ice “remained intractable, impenetrable, and, for those who challenged it, a kind of fate” (p. 5) George Malcom Thomson reported that the Passage did not exist where popular imagination speculated it must be (Day, 2006). He noted: “the whole enterprise was founded on a misapprehension, a geographical fiction, a fairy-tale … and downright inventions that scholar manufacture to amaze themselves” (p. xxv).
The danger of the passage: Voyages to and in search of the passage were fraught. Many never returned, and those who did survive faced immense physical and mental challenges. There were, of course, significant difficulties with massive ice drifts and shelves. However, the relative location of the expeditions to the north pole led to issues with magnetic variation for compasses. Fog further complicated travel (Williams & Costley, 2010).
There were also extreme mental dangers to pursuing the NWP. MooSmith’s expedition in the mid-1700s reported “potentially murderous quarrels between officers” (Williams & Costley, 2010, p. xvi); John Franklin noted that the things that occurred on his ship “must not be known” (p. xvi); and it was noted that on the McClure, Beckler, and Collinson expeditions, “tensions” erupted “as captains and subordinate officers exchanged threats of court martial, and some officers spend years under close arrest on their ships” (p. xvi).
In the time of Bridgerton: The end of the Napoleonic Wars in 1815 allowed for greater expeditions by the British Royal Navy (Day, 2006). This would have included surveys of a large portion of the global north and the Arctic. There were a large number of “successful” (depending on how you define it) land expeditions that had made progress in producing surveys and maps of the region. Despite significant ongoing interest in discovering the Passage, in particular, little progress had been made. Later still, despite more advanced mapping by the Hudson Bay Company and expeditions by many notable sailors, there was still no route by the 1820s (Day, 2006).
What does it signify? If a character in Bridgerton was voyaging to the Arctic, it could take them less than a year to reach areas of the Hudson Bay that would be suitable for a scientific voyage. That in itself is not overly dangerous. However, the reference to the Northwest Passage is an interesting literary point. Of all of the places to voyage in the Arctic, even at the time, it would have been an immensely dangerous trip to set out on. The persistent lack of success for a solid 30 years after this season takes place may reference the fact that this is a voyage that Debling is unlikely to ever return from.
It doesn’t help that Debling’s odds are really stacked against him. He does not eat meat, one of the only renewable sources of food for arctic expeditions. There is little to no fresh naturally occurring produce (during the Coppermine expedition, the surviving crew members famously ate lichen to survive once they lost the favour of local indigenous groups and fur traders) and did not do well.
Certainly, it lends a very tragic potential element to the story. The Arctic, if mentioned alone, is not necessarily an overly dangerous location to travel to. Yes, marine travel in the 1800s was still a dangerous endeavour in its own right, let alone in an area as unnavigable by sea as the Arctic. However, the North, in many regions, had active whaling expeditions, Indigenous populations that were willing to trade and work with sailors, and (in some areas) active fur trades. If the purpose of Debling’s travel was only to highlight his unique interests and sense of purpose, the show had many methods of doing so. The choice to reference a notorious and dangerous Northwest Passage, there is an extremely interesting element of danger that is introduced.
What would this potential marriage mean for Penelope? Of course, Penelope’s name is a reference to the wife of Odysseus, who unwillingly takes ten years to return home after the Trojan war. In contrast to Colin, who returns with a steadfast conviction, Debling may represent a kind of eternal limbo for Penelope, should she marry him. Although Debling’s trip is set to take 3 years, it would be hard to prove his death. Likely, she would be a widow for years, if not her entire life, before they were able to locate his ship. The HMS Terror was famously lost in 1845 and not located until 2016(!). As a result, Penelope would likely be stuck at home, awaiting his return, in the same tragic fashion of her namesake in Greek mythology.
As such, not only is there a potential tragic reference to Debling’s future, but there is also a dark illusion to what Penelope’s life may look like as his wife. Of course, this is all based entirely on implication, but it is an interesting act of speculative foreshadowing.
Thanks for reading!
References
Brandt, A. (2011). The man who ate his boots: the tragic history of the search for the northwest passage. Anchor.
Day, A. (2006). Historical dictionary of the discovery and exploration of the Northwest Passage (Vol. 3). Scarecrow Press.
Panikkar, B., Lemmond, B., Else, B., & Murray, M. (2018). Ice over troubled waters: Navigating the Northwest Passage using Inuit knowledge and scientific information. Climate Research, 75(1), 81-94.
Williams, G., & Costley, S. (2010). Arctic labyrinth: The quest for the Northwest Passage. University of California Press.

A loud blast in gulfs the small life less camp, a bigger explosion hits the barn and a huge rock hits it's roof. Rushing to the scene five fire fighters in one truck, as Soon as they arrive three start to grab the hose and the last two prepare the water by turning the small wheel to run the water.The last turn and the rushing water comes flying out pushing the men back, they lift the hose aiming for the barn.Three hours later the fire has rested, the barn covered in black ash lays lifelessly on the ground in the black charred dirt, the men sift looking for victims. An hour later they hit and find something massive at first one thought it was a burnt up ash of a cow, but then they found a massive rock! The fore men cautiously take a look to find it was still very hot and still smoldering in the ground. The men call the police and anyone who could help them identify this unearthly rock.The police arrive with a few towns people who were professors at the nearby college, looking and studying the rock one professor came to conclude that it wasn't a rock, but a huge meteorite that made its way from space to earth. As soon as the professor told the people they decided to remove it, two hours later a crane arrived to pick up this massive meteorite the tow truck backed up and the man hoped out wrapping the old rusted chains around it giving it a tug to check the chains, he gets in the truck and presses the accelerator gently. Not bearing the meteorite suddenly becomes engulfed in flames once more, the people who were standing there are now apart of the black silted dirt that surrounds the rock, two of the firemen call for backup and drives away giving it room.The meteorite then moves forward towards the small pool of water near the barn, touching the water the meteorite suddenly explodes killing the remaining people surrounding, the helplessly bodies charred and smoldering lay as if they were two the barn.The meteorite then shifts into the earth turning into a smaller lengthy slithering object. Twenty minutes have past and the backup arrives, the firemen hop out looking at a field covered in ash and the charred bodies of their friends, the fire truck still on fire burns away into the deep smoke filled darkness of the night. Holding a small memorial a couple days later the town mourns the loss of it's fellow friends and fire fighters and the sons of the men as they are carried in
there small wooden caskets with a red white and blue flag with fifty stars.The wife's of the men weeped until their eyes were dry. Lowering into the ground the caskets moved slowly into the layered brown dirt, the fire men speak to the town leaving peaceful words. The next day the firemen are called to a small brushfire near the towns edge were the cemetery and the church are located, speeding down the dirt road they arrive to find that the fire has not yet reach any structures, rushing out they grab shovels and pix axes to dig trenches around the main structures, on doing so the fire grows bigger each second.The wind picked up carrying the flames towards the helpless men and the church, the pine trees surrounding the church suddenly catch fire as if they were fuel, the men trapped run into the church hoping for a miracle. Praying and sitting the men wait, wait for their last breath into the fire. The church now on fire starts to collapse with giant beams falling into the middle, one of the men is struck and killed instantly as the other men watch, crying the other men are inflamed and burning with their suit melting. Running the men fall laying on the ground charred and killed. The town now mourns the loss of more men and the loss of their church, standing near the water on the other side of town they let the caskets peacefully float and flow down the river bobbing down and up traveling towards the wooden bridge.The community now devastated does whatever possible to prevent more fires. Couple quiet and peaceful months later the wells dry up, people now only now have one source of water and it's the old shallow river, the river used for transportation has never been consumed of by humans.The townspeople do not like to drink from the river because they have seen the animals that have done so and died because of the contaminated water.Taking the water the towns people boil and make sure the water is crystal clear, floating down the Rivera small boat arrives with a black small tank to store the water for the people. Only having enough to last them for a couple weeks. Two weeks later three people have died of dehydration and worse the river has dried up.The townspeople call for help but no one responds. Curious the sheriff leaves to go out to the other town, reaching the end of the town crossing into the other county the sheriff is suddenly stopped by a gunshot to his tires, rushing from behind a small tree and foliage three camouflaged soldiers in uniform yell and tell the sheriff to stop.The sheriff walking out of the vehicle tells the soldiers
not to shoot and that he is the sheriff, uncaringly the soldiers then shoot him in the knee making flesh and bone fly off and exposing the muscle and bone that is now destroyed by the bullet, crying and laying on the ground the sheriff crawls toward the soldier asking why he shot him, the soldier then answers with his gun firing once more in the sheriffs skull splitting it and exposing the oozing brains that soak into the dry ground. Worried the townspeople wait for the sheriff to return with more water, they wait for three hours before sending a search party with two people, two young men in their early twenties load up into the truck, the men grabbed two guns one .308 lever action rifle and the other a 16 gauge shotgun, following the tire tracks of the sheriffs vehicle they finally come across his vehicle. Getting out of the truck the two men cautiously step out and walk up inspecting the vehicle, stepping into the blood soaked ground the men find two bullet casings marked m.i. USA NATO .223, recognizing the case one man says that this is a military weapon that this case was fired from the other man in disbelief agrees and searches more for more clues. Looking at the car one man sees that one bullet pierced the tires, but looks for the location of were the other one has hit.The blood that they stepped in is now almost soaked into the ground.The men look once more and them crawls back into the truck driving forward toward the car. Inching closely to the vehicle a loud boom and a shriek of a bullet comes piercing through the window into the passengers jaw splitting and tearing the flesh from his mouth.The lower jaw is now gone, teeth now litter the floor and on the dashboard with flesh and blood covering the seat.The passenger shrieking in pain cant speak, he mumbles and makes noises that is unrecognizable, the driver panicking ducks and slams the gas crashing into the vehicle, flying through the windshield the driver slams into the back of the car breaking the glass perching his flesh on his face.The driver then crawls into the vehicle hoping not to get shot, soldiers rush to the truck to find a moaning guy who half of his jaw is gone, they forcefully yank him and throw him to the dirt covered ground, his clothes covered in dust he now knows he is not gonna live very long. The sun is now setting on the small town of the twenty three people that is left, clouds start to build up and it now begins to rain, people rushing out of there homes grab any kind of device to catch the rain in, thirty minutes pass and It is now dark and a light drizzle still falls.The parents of the two sons wait till its eight the expected arrival time of the men. Eight comes very slowly with the parents waiting eagerly to meet there children once more. Eight thirty passes and no
signs of any vehicle or their children come.The parents now worried begin to panic and and wait a little more.While waiting the parents fall into a deep sleep not waking until ten the next morning.The chickens pecking at the ground begin to die slowly due to starvation, the ants slowly eat and surround the dead chickens in swarms.The townspeople now all awake begin to make plans to search for all of the people that are missing, the mayor of the town decides split into four, three people stay in town and five groups of four are made each taking a side of the town. Slowly walking away you can hear the voices of the people calling out the names of the loss. Footsteps cover the ground following the tire tracks, each person inspecting every part of the surroundings as much as possible.Thirty minutes later they get a glimpse of a smoke cloud up ahead, smelling burning rubber the black thick smoke surrounds the group, covering up their noses and mouth they search both vehicles. One person yells out to the others that he found one man on the ground burnt to a crisp smoldering. Dragging the body the flesh melts into the persons hand burning and stinging his flesh, unable to drag the body anymore the group panics and runs toward the town, running through the thick dead grass and bushes a small beeping noise alerts the group, the leader suddenly is instantly vaporized into a cloud of flesh and blood, realizing that they have ran into a minefield.The people seeing the aftermath of the mines begin to freak out and spread. Returning to the small town the four groups meet back up to discuss what they have found.They begin to count to make sure all twenty three are there, but they see four are still gone, waiting they here yelling from afar. Hearing the yelling all of the groups run out too see what the noise is.A dust covered man runs out of the dead dry grass towards the group, once reaching the group the man falls to his knees and cries and mumbles. Curious of why he is crying the people start to question him. Two days later three more people have died of starvation, the town not knowing what to do decides to dig and find water.The mayor calls for a meeting at the center of the town, all of the townspeople gather and listen to the mayor.The mayor speaks about digging and where they should dig, after the long pointless speech the townspeople gather digging supplies such as shovels pix axes and more, traveling to the location the people begin to chomp away at the rock hard sandy dirt.
Five hours later a man in his early thirties hits a hard piece of metal of some sort, curious they begin to dig around it. Reaching one side they decide to leave it a dig around it, but one man curious still wants to dig it out. It was now dark and no water has been found, without the water no one will be able to work any longer, but one man still out working is still trying to dig up the huge metal round rock. Giving up he shoots his anger towards the rock hitting it as hard as he could with the pic axe, as soon as he hit it the third time the rock began to move, freaking out the man began to run but was struck by a piece of limestone going through his abdomen killing him.The rock is now gone a afar where no one will reach it again. The next morning the townspeople awoke to find the body of the man and also the weapon, the limestone was small and rectangular in shape. Inspecting the body one man believes it was one of the townspeople that killed him, another man also agrees and begins to investigate. Rushing towards a small house outside of town the two men slam open the door and barge in, the man laying in his bed is grabbed and beaten, the man questions the men, the men answer by telling him that he is a murderer, puzzled the man tells them that he is not, but sure they take him out to the center of the town. Coming out of their homes the townspeople are surprised and also believe that he is the murderer. Five men and one woman look for anything they can burn, finding sticks and logs they begin to stack them into a bed, the bed now made is the final resting place for the accused murderer. Walking towards the bed the murderer begins to cry and shout out, but no one cares, once laying on the bed the man is bound by his hands by a small rope. Struggling on the bed another man lights a torch and throws it under the bed, catching on fire the wood slowly burns, the man now covered in flames is heard from far away yelling and crying with screams of pain. Smoke covers the town and the smell of burning flesh smothers the noses of the people around.Two hours later the bed is now completely burned down, all that is left is a small pile of ash and a burnt bones of the man. Digging a hole the townspeople push the ash in and bury him to be lost forever. With now fourteen people left in the town the mayor gives up, he waits in his small dirty house alone for any hope.Two days past and no signs until one man is seen digging in the dried up river, the mayor catching a glimpse of him steps outside to get a better view, stepping out side the mayor stands watching from
afar.Twenty minutes pass and the man begins to yell, the mayor hearing and seeing him rushes towards him as fast as possible. Getting closer the mayor can see a small pool of water beneath the mans feet, in joy the mayor calls the townspeople telling them to dig again. Only three people show up by the river telling the mayor that the others are to tired and need water to work, grabbing the shovels the people begin to dig, the mayor runs to his house and grabs buckets to fill. One hour has past and the mayor now has five buckets of water, preparing the fire to boil the water a small woman stands waiting for the fire to spark off, the fire finally catches and is burning furiously, grabbing the water she begins to boil one bucket at a time. People now begin to show up waiting for there chance to finally taste some liquid.

Hi folks! I'm an LA local but I grew up on the west side, went to college at USC, have lived in Chinatown and Hollywood, and now am looking to move further East again and get my own place. I'm hoping someone with more insight into these neighborhoods and what its like to live alone could help me with this tough choice.
I am trying to decide between two studio apartments, one in Echo Park, right off Sunset near Elysian, and one in Historic Filipinotown.
They're both owned by individual landlords (rather than big property companies) who seem nice and responsive (I mean you never know, but I got good vibes from both). They're the same price. Both buildings seem secure and safe. They're both street parking only (a pain, but it's what I can afford). They both have full, eat-in kitchens and full bathrooms. They both have ample natural light. They both require setting up/paying my own utilities (other than trash).
The HiFi place is much bigger and nicer, with ample closet space. It's an upper unit with a small balcony. There is also (coin-operated) laundry on site. The apartment has an AC unit already installed. It's a small building and everyone who lives there seems super nice and friendly. These are all the pros-- the biggest con to me is the walkability of the neighborhood. I don't get the sense that there are a ton of grocery stores, parks, coffee shops, etc. that I'd want to walk to, which is pretty important to me.
The Echo Park place is in a PRIME location for walking. I know this neighborhood well and it's one of my favorites to hang out in. The unit itself is a lot smaller (probably around 420sq vs 620sq) , with very little closet space (a bit of a concern for me cuz I have a lot of clothes...). It doesn't have on-site laundry; there is a laundromat down the street. The units are bungalow-style, and all the neighbors seem nice and friendly as well. There is no AC, but I can put in a window unit.
I am leaning towards the Echo Park place, because location/walkability is my number one factor. A lot of my friends are urging me to go with the HiFi place instead though, mostly cuz of the size of the apartment. But if anyone with insight into what it's like living (and PARKING) in either neighborhood, especially as a young single woman, has input, I would really appreciate it.
Help me? I need to fire off an application today before both places get snapped up!
(Also, I know I could just apply to both, but both landlords made it clear that they expect to approve and move forward with my application once submitted.)
​

We arrive in Beppu by ferry after 2 weeks in Shikoku on 13.11.24 and would like to spend 3 nights before heading to Fukuoka for 4 days.
I'm having trouble deciding how to spend the days and where to base ourselves.
Places of interest:

• Kunisaki Peninsula
• Kuju Mountains Hike (Taisen or Kutsukake)
• Beppu
• Yufuin
• Amagase Onsen/Hita Onsen

We want to see some of the best of the scenery in Oita, eat great food, soak in onsens etc. but obviously 3 days is very little, we don't want to spend 3 nights with kaiseki dinner each night (it gets too much) but would like a night or two to be in a nice Ryokan.
We were originally thinking 1 day Beppu, 1 day Kunisaki peninsula, 1 day Kuju mountains, spending 1 night in Beppu itself. However, I'm now thinking that we should probably choose either Kokonoe area (including Kuju mountains, Hita Onsen etc.) OR the Kunisaki Peninsula. We've already visited Kyushu and visited Aso and Kurokawa Onsen (which we adored, but first time in Oita.
So maybe something like
1 night Beppu (or Yufuin) but Beppu has the sea.
1 night Hita Onsen
1 night in Okuhita Onsen Umehibiki (the splurge of the holiday)
Any tips/ suggestions?

I'm on PC, first off.
A little over a month ago, around the time that the souvenir shop glitch was still a problem, my main Franchise zoo started crashing the entire game on load. The game would load fine, but when I would select that zoo and try to load it, the entire game would crash. I figured I could give it some time and come back later.
Three days ago, the crash on ONLY that zoo was still happening. Other Franchises would load, but not that one -- the one I had spent the most time in. I never placed the glitchy Souvenir Shop.
After massive googling, trying to turn off all mods one at a time (and making sure all mods were updated,) that Franchise zoo was STILL not loading. I gave up on it, said "Maybe I'll find a fix in the future," and started a new Franchise zoo.
I was building in it for these three days. Pretty extensive, I had missed building habitats and was getting back into the swing of things. Only hours ago, I was playing this zoo with no problem. I save and close the game, and go to eat lunch.
Now the problem is happening AGAIN. This Franchise zoo is three days old, and crashes the entire game on loadup. Once again, I never placed the Souvenir Shop, so the crashes are not related to that. The game was also playing just fine with my mods, so it can't be the mods.
I genuinely have no idea what to do, but it's disheartening to think I just have to choose between never playing Planet Zoo again due to this undetermined thing crashing my games, or commit to never knowing when a Franchise zoo will suddenly become unplayable.
Any help with this would be massively appreciated. I know that Frontier says "we can't help you if you're playing with mods," but I'm very confident that a normal mod problem is not what is causing this issue.

Super new to this but here goes…. I have just spent the week living in a family member’s home due to them needing care. Now I have done this before and have mentally prepared and then come home feeling ok however this time I feel like I am in an emotional black hole and really want to just be left completely on my own. FYI recently diagnosed in my 40’s after signs and symptoms have been increasing.
A little context, myself and my husband will stay with these relatives when they need us, they are both very poorly but can cope by themselves under normal circumstances. My hubs works on site and I work from home so I do the main bulk of care because it’s easier and I absolutely and truly don’t mind and physically the care isn’t demanding however these relatives had a loss directly before our stay with them and one member is in a state where they sometimes don’t remember this loss but they are not so far gone that you can get round the explanation of the loss with a small lie. The other relative is in grief and has also been through a medical procedure (hence our helping with care) and is really not in the headspace to handle their partner’s confusion so it has been on me to help field the repeated explanations of absence and it’s like they are reliving the loss over again which is truly sad. I am not naturally emotional, I can empathise but I recognise that I don’t show emotion like a standard person which I suppose has worked to my advantage this week as I am able to talk through things on repeat without breaking down and I have felt no difference in myself during this time. My issue is that I am now home back in my own space and I just can’t place exactly where I am with my own feelings. Usually working and keeping myself busy is my absolute go-to (family have a business that I help with that keeps me occupied outside of my other job) but even the thought of it has given me dread and I really would like to just lock myself in a room far away from people and be alone.
I just want to doomscroll and eat ice cream.
Is this a normal thing for people to feel?

What does becoming a teacher mean to me?
It means adulthood. What is adulthood? Adulthood is living in a house, or an apartment or away from one's family of origin. Yes, I know some races of persons live in extended families. For me, adulthood means living elsewhere. Teaching to me means the ability to get this for myself.
Adulthood means land. I want to eventually have control over the food I eat. I want to grow my own vegetables, my own fruits without pesticides and other strange chemicals. Adulthood means the ability for me to have my own land.
Adulthood means a car. It means not making multiple trips to and fro places. It means not burning up in the hot, hot sun. It means not being tired physically carrying myself to so many places. It means comfort, driving, cool air, not being exposed to the rain, or having to ride with persons who may make me uncomfortable with their sexually suggestive banter. Adulthood means the ability for me to get a car.
Adulthood means a career. It means having something to do on a weekly basis. It means having the protections of a career, namely access to things - possible loans among others. Adulthood means having the chance to have a career.
Adulthood means having a salary. Having a salary means having the ability to move around in the world. In many a place, women are held back from moving about in the world. Women are oftentimes tied to a man. They are prevented from having their own money. Their energies are allocated to child rearing, caring for a home, caring for elders. I realize how fortunate I am that I have had access to higher education, to indeed have a career. Adulthood means the ability to have a career.
Adulthood means savings. Savings means security. It means being able to afford one's needs, emergency or not. Savings means enjoyment, comfort. Adulthood would mean I could get a chance to have savings.
Adulthood means strong relationships. Or rather, different ones. It means navigating life with coworkers, hobby friends, relatives, your own parents as an adult. It means changing dynamics. Adulthood would afford me the ability to have strong relationships.
Teaching means adulthood. Adulthood is good. It means leaving the private market, and entering the safety and comfort of the public market. It means leaving independent contracting work in favor of salary. It means taking my place in society, as a worker, and having a title. It means being a woman. I am biologically a woman. But now, I'd be more of a woman, a self-sufficient woman.
Teaching means having little luxuries, my creature comforts. It means a stove, a refrigerator, a washer dryer combo in my own place. It means controlling who is around me, and that I can choose to leave when I wish. Teaching means health, that I can have a varied diet. It means maintenance, that I can look my best, and engage the services of beauty professionals to get my nails done, my hair done, my makeup done, and buy more high-quality, in style clothing.
Teaching means hobbies. It means stability in my work schedule, so that I can do other things in the off times. This can mean starting a business, having a hobby, hanging out with others, or just catching up on some sleep. Teaching may mean travel abroad. It may mean stamps in my passport, a visa or two. Teaching means general enjoyment. That's what it means to me.
I find the gatekeeping of long-term, well-paying employment wicked. Yes, I know persons must specialize, take their trainings to perform their jobs well. But when you have persons willing and able to do a job, why prevent them from doing so? It doesn't make sense I think.
This is a momentous occasion. I'm getting ready to take a place in life. This sets the stage for many more things. What shall I do to commemorate the occasion? Well, I'm writing this post, so that's one thing. I want to dress up and take myself somewhere when I get my first salary. Secretary, put that on the books. One outing with me well done up when I first get paid, okay?
Life is good. Me moving into this new stage means that I would have learned enough to get me here. I have learned a lot, truly. I learned about men, and dating. I learned about people, friends, not so friends. I've learned about me, what I want, what I do not want, the kind of life I want to life, and what others expect of me. I've learned about reasonable expectations, and what it means to be an adult living with other adults. I've learned about security, and investment, romantic investment, what it looks like, and what it does not look like. I've learned to choose me, but make allowances for others. I've learned about others. I've learned that it's not always only about me, that I don't exist in a vacuum, and that my life is not only my own.
I've learned that there is so much to explore with me. I think I know me, but this new stage is going to make me grow more, and be more me.
So that's what teaching means to me. I'm sure it will mean a lot more, like getting to show off my skills, and getting to educate a generation. I'm sure it'll mean other things like routine, and monotony, trudging through the day for the sake of supporting myself. But I'm ready. I know the material. I've done this before. Things will go well. Others have done it. And now is my turn. It's my turn. It's my turn. It's. My. Turn.
I don't have to fight anyone for it. It's my turn. I don't have to beg anyone for it. It's my turn. I don't have to steal it. It's my turn. I don't have to pay for it. I believe I've already paid a lot. Also, It's. My. Turn. It's my turn to enjoy myself. It's my turn to advance, and get my master's degree, and get my doctorate. Let me change my name a bit, yeah? I've done the work. I've put in my time. I haven't promised to support anyone financially. I haven't sired any children that I must care for. I'm not cheating anyone by not working and expecting payment. I'm just here, signing up for work, preparing myself as best I can, and waiting my turn, just like everyone else.
I come wanting to work. I come wanting to do good work. I come wanting to cooperate. I come ready. It is time. It is my time. Let's do this.
On we go.

“This book is on voyages to the North, where Lord Debling intends to travel.”
“Miss Featherington, are you reading about the fabled Northwest Passage?”
(S3 E4 11:16)
Hi everyone! I posted a comment about it right after season 3 dropped, and I have seen a bit of interest in the Northwest Passage on here recently. I thought that for those of you who didn’t learn about it extensively in school in the small corner of Canada that I did, I’d put together a little informative post on the extremely brief (and perhaps even inconsequential!) reference to the Northwest Passage in Episode 4. I’ll provide an overview of the Passage and its history, touch on some characteristics of travel to this region, and conclude with some completely speculative comments on the literary purpose of evoking the passage in this scene in Season 4.
A quick note on the colonial nature of this post: Throughout this short post, I refer to several colonial expeditions to the land many of us call Canada. Although I attempt to be cognizant of my language, it is important to note that the Inuit people who live in the arctic regions that I reference have navigated the sea ice for thousands of years (Panikkar et al., 2018) and that the written history of this region are often hegemonic and euro-centric narratives that were formed within colonial frameworks.
More information on the Inuit and their culture, language, and traditions can be found here: https://www.itk.ca/about-canadian-inuit/
References are at the end. If you like this post, you might also like the speculative post I made about the influences of the Eros/Psyche quote in the Polin sub which is also endless academic yapping.
Exploring the Northwest Passage- a bit of context
In August of 1820, Lieutenant Edward Parry, a member of the British Royal Navy observed the dense ice and snow of arctic land and sea that was thought to be the location of the mysterious Northwest Passage. From a simple look, he knew that no ship in existence would be able to pass through ice sheets of such a great thickness and that extended for such a long distance (Brandt, 2011). Despite his pessimism, by Parry’s time, British sailors and explorers had been explicitly seeking the passage for hundreds of years (Williams & Costley, 2010; Day, 2006, p. xxiv), dreaming of exploiting the desirable economic prospect of a Western route from Europe to burgeoning Asian markets.
First encounters: When European sailors first encountered North America, it was in pursuit of a route west to Asia. They were, of course, incorrect about the location of Asia. And although a great deal of interest shifted to mapping the new continent, there was also an acknowledgement that there would be great economic benefits to finding a way around this newly encountered landmass (Day, 2006). Over time, the reasons and methods of locating the Northwest Passage changed and evolved, but interest never truly went away.
Renewed British interest: Notably, at the end of the 15^th century, when the Ottoman Turk’s empire extended into the Mediterranean and eastward, European merchants were no longer allowed to move and trade freely (Day, 2006). Seeking new routes for the Pacific, European (and especially British) explorers turned West. The Northwest Passage was a concept, a theoretical possibility, for European explorers. It was seen as a potential commercial sea route to the trading markets that were already established and burgeoning in Asia. The Passage was a route with phenomenal economic potential, especially as European consumers sought spices, materials, salts, and woods from foreign markets (Williams & Costley, 2010).
Based on their knowledge of the Southern Hemisphere and the potential geography of the world, many believed that a similar passage would be reflected in the earth’s northern pole (Day, 2006). As a result, there was a massive potential for financial gain for colonial governments and individuals, should such a passage ever be found.
Public fascination: The passage became a point of national fascination for many members of the public. In pursuit of this fascination, many enthusiastic researchers “persuaded persons of influence and wealth to send out discovery expeditions” (Williams & Costley, 2010, p. xv). With governments in Europe stabilizing, the emergence of an economy of cheap labour (lower class men who were willing to take on the dangerous work at sea), and the rapid development of ship technology, the 1600s was a prime time to set out on expeditions.
The fascination with the Passage continued for 300 years until a passage was finally navigated by sea in full in the 1900s. Over the course of history, Anthony Brandt describes the fascination with the Passage’s discovery as a tragedy (2011). He writes: “hubris, an all-too-human arrogance and pride that triggered a particular calamity” (p. 5) as being the tragedy of the exploration for the Passage. Despite the fascination of the public with it, the ice “remained intractable, impenetrable, and, for those who challenged it, a kind of fate” (p. 5) George Malcom Thomson reported that the Passage did not exist where popular imagination speculated it must be (Day, 2006). He noted: “the whole enterprise was founded on a misapprehension, a geographical fiction, a fairy-tale … and downright inventions that scholar manufacture to amaze themselves” (p. xxv).
The danger of the passage: Voyages to and in search of the passage were fraught. Many never returned, and those who did survive faced immense physical and mental challenges. There were, of course, significant difficulties with massive ice drifts and shelves. However, the relative location of the expeditions to the north pole led to issues with magnetic variation for compasses. Fog further complicated travel (Williams & Costley, 2010).
There were also extreme mental dangers to pursuing the NWP. MooSmith’s expedition in the mid-1700s reported “potentially murderous quarrels between officers” (Williams & Costley, 2010, p. xvi); John Franklin noted that the things that occurred on his ship “must not be known” (p. xvi); and it was noted that on the McClure, Beckler, and Collinson expeditions, “tensions” erupted “as captains and subordinate officers exchanged threats of court martial, and some officers spend years under close arrest on their ships” (p. xvi).
In the time of Bridgerton: The end of the Napoleonic Wars in 1815 allowed for greater expeditions by the British Royal Navy (Day, 2006). This would have included surveys of a large portion of the global north and the Arctic. There were a large number of “successful” (depending on how you define it) land expeditions that had made progress in producing surveys and maps of the region. Despite significant ongoing interest in discovering the Passage, in particular, little progress had been made. Later still, despite more advanced mapping by the Hudson Bay Company and expeditions by many notable sailors, there was still no route by the 1820s (Day, 2006).
What does it signify? If a character in Bridgerton was voyaging to the Arctic, it could take them less than a year to reach areas of the Hudson Bay that would be suitable for a scientific voyage. That in itself is not overly dangerous. However, the reference to the Northwest Passage is an interesting literary point. Of all of the places to voyage in the Arctic, even at the time, it would have been an immensely dangerous trip to set out on. The persistent lack of success for a solid 30 years after this season takes place may reference the fact that this is a voyage that Debling is unlikely to ever return from.
It doesn’t help that Debling’s odds are really stacked against him. He does not eat meat, one of the only renewable sources of food for arctic expeditions. There is little to no fresh naturally occurring produce (during the Coppermine expedition, the surviving crew members famously ate lichen to survive once they lost the favour of local indigenous groups and fur traders) and did not do well.
Certainly, it lends a very tragic potential element to the story. The Arctic, if mentioned alone, is not necessarily an overly dangerous location to travel to. Yes, marine travel in the 1800s was still a dangerous endeavour in its own right, let alone in an area as unnavigable by sea as the Arctic. However, the North, in many regions, had active whaling expeditions, Indigenous populations that were willing to trade and work with sailors, and (in some areas) active fur trades. If the purpose of Debling’s travel was only to highlight his unique interests and sense of purpose, the show had many methods of doing so. The choice to reference a notorious and dangerous Northwest Passage, there is an extremely interesting element of danger that is introduced.
What would this potential marriage mean for Penelope? Of course, Penelope’s name may be a reference to the wife of Odysseus, who unwillingly takes ten years to return home after the Trojan war. In contrast to Colin, who returns with a steadfast conviction, Debling, as a traveler, may represent a kind of eternal limbo for Penelope, should she marry him. Although Debling’s trip is set to take 3 years, it would be hard to prove his death. Likely, she would be a widow for years, if not her entire life, before they were able to locate his ship. The HMS Terror was famously lost in 1845 and not located until 2016(!). As a result, Penelope would likely be stuck at home, awaiting his return, in the same tragic fashion of her namesake in Greek mythology.
As such, not only is there a potential tragic reference to Debling’s future, but there is also a dark illusion to what Penelope’s life may look like as his wife. Of course, this is all based entirely on implication, but it is an interesting act of speculative foreshadowing.
Thanks for reading!
References
Brandt, A. (2011). The man who ate his boots: the tragic history of the search for the northwest passage. Anchor.
Day, A. (2006). Historical dictionary of the discovery and exploration of the Northwest Passage (Vol. 3). Scarecrow Press.
Panikkar, B., Lemmond, B., Else, B., & Murray, M. (2018). Ice over troubled waters: Navigating the Northwest Passage using Inuit knowledge and scientific information. Climate Research, 75(1), 81-94.
Williams, G., & Costley, S. (2010). Arctic labyrinth: The quest for the Northwest Passage. University of California Press.

My cat Eevee has always been a scaredy cat. She’s very sweet and loving but she darts and hides if she hears a loud noise. She was in an abusive household for about 7 months (long story short she was my ex’s cat, we broke up. Ex moved away for a temp job and placed her in an abusive foster home, eventually I got her after learning this 7 months after the fact). She’s been out of the home for about a year now and she’s come back to her normal sweet (but still scared) self.
Today I was brushing her and she was purring and slow blinking and having a grand time. My other cat was eating her fur, I told her no don’t eat that! Grabbed the hair out of her mouth and threw it away and went back to brushing Eevee. She continued to purr but then 10 seconds later she suddenly ran and hid. Usually if she’s scared she’ll let me come close to her and stares at me but today she’s shrinking away and meowing the same was she did when I first got her back. What did I do wrong? Can cats have ptsd? Is that a thing?! She’s eating and drinking water but if me or my spouse come to her she shrinks away and cries.

So after being told to try Leven’s (thank you) i did and i was amazed, it was my first pastrami sandwich I’ve ever had! When I ordered take out the sandwich was perfectly wrapped, there was a lot of meat yet it was composed. After speaking with one of the lovely staffers they gave me a free additional cookie! This was 2-3 weeks ago.
Today, I had an additional $25 to spend so I wanted to try the bagel deli. It’s been on my food bucket list, today was the day. I ordered take out, really excited to try it. I open it and there’s a lot of pastrami. A lot of pastrami. And since they don’t wrap their sandwiches, it’s in a to-go box so there’s pastrami in the small pockets of the to go box, and just everywhere. I didn’t mind this, however I wish it was a little more neat instead of more meat
I appreciate them cutting the sandwich in half as well. As I pick it up there’s a bunch of meat hanging out my mouth and the texture is similar to bacon. But after 2-3 bites, I wasn’t really feeling it. It was really greasy, I also would’ve preferred for the side sauce to be placed on the sandwich for me.
The fries were okay really dry, the potato salad was good and the tossed salad was good.
I gave Leven’s a 9/10, I’d give this one a 6/10 not that it was bad it just wasn’t all that. It felt like I was eating a greasy meat sandwich not a pastrami sandwich. Would I order it again? No. But I will go back and try a different dish.

my sister (19F) and I (17F) have NEVER gotten along for long. we've argued our whole lives and we are the complete opposite of each other. if it helps, shes an INFJ and im an INFP.
so we'd argued all day, literally since I woke up we've been arguing. so things were already tense.
we had to go to my grandparents for a birthday thing for lunch and I don't eat at the table (I never do, this isn't new and no one cares). but ofc my sister takes it upon herself to tell me it's disrespectful. maybe if I was at some formal dinner but these r my grandparents, I stay at their place for weeks at a time (mostly to get away from my sister). I tell her that no one cares and I just wanna watch TV while I eat.
so I put a movie on (I also asked her earlier if she wanted to watch any in there from my collection of blu rays but she said I only have boy movies, bc thats another thing, she criticises my favourite things but whatever). as I'm setting up the movie she comes in and says shes gonna eat in here. I told her I like to eat alone (especially since she's been pissing me off all day) and she's stubborn as hell so I decided to leave and just eat somewhere else.
which is ridiculous, she doesnt even want to watch a movie she just hates our grandpa and our dad so she doesnt want to sit with them (I have great relationships with them too, she hates the ENTIRE family except mum and nana).
but when I left, she gets pissy bc she handles emotions as well as a 6 year old so she narcs to mum (which she does ALL THE TIME). so I don't wanna start anything so I come back and just deal with it but then she just says despicable me. I'm like what? she says I wanna watch despicable me. yeah no matter I'd just spent 5 minutes skipping the ads on this movie and my food is getting cold) but WHATEVER. I go to get it and im changing going thru the motions again, all the ads.
also the movie I'd put on before was hotel Transylvania but she didn't wanna watch it bc its "sad". she calls every family movie sad. I csnt even say the word WALL-E or god forbid fhe lion king. I'm an insanely emotional person, but the difference between us is I like to express sadness and I cry a lot when she expresses all her emotions in anger. she says im depressed all the time and makes fun and asks if I "forgot my anti-depressants". I don't even take them, and if I did she'd mock me and say that that im a bad person for taking mental heath drugs.
so movies on, I can finally eat and for a while we actuslly get along and since it's a background movie rly she's not forcing me to rewind every 3 minutes. that's y I stopped watching movies with her, she made me rewind and it's take a afternoon to watch ONE movie. she also didn't want to watch anything with me when our parents were home as if she's embarrassed to watch stuff with me. which feels GREAT. I think it's bc she doesn't want dad to see her watch a "kids" movie like beethoven.
so we laughing, it's okay. well except the part when she says i need to eat like a "lady" and that i need to be "ladylike". do u know how much that makes me want to burp in her face?im considered relatively "unladylike" i guess. i swear a lot and i make a lot of dirty jokes. its part of my charm lol. she hates it tho. and my sarcasm, REALLY hates it.
i finish eating snd after a while I get a little bored so I start playing temple run 2 on my phone. she HATES me reading, or looking st my phone if she's with me, she gets rly angry but I'd figured since its just a background movie it's fine. she says to me, very blunt, get off her ur phone. and I have this thing where I hate being told what to do, if it's unreasonable or how they say it. so I don't get off my phone. she then opens her phone and starts watching yt shorts very loudly. I think she expects this to annoy me but news flash, I don't give a shit what she does bc I don't obsess over what other ppl do like she does.
still tho, I don't wanna listen to her preachy, anti-feminism, homophobic bullshit on full blast. thats another thing, I'm a huge supporter of the feminist movement and equality and lgbt rights when shes dead against it. she thinks mothers csnt have careers and being lgbt is wrong. she uses her religion as an excuse for it too. I'm a nihilist as well so every time I say jesus or oh my god she freaks out at me. idc what her religion is, I don't tell her what to do but she tells me I'm being disrespectful. oh I csn get real disrespectful real fast but I don't bc thats her opinion and this is mine.
some thing thats ironic is that im super for lgbt and women rights even more bc of her. I hate seeing how hateful she is towards these groups and minorities so it's made me support them even more. also fhe fact that she's called me a lesbian and intersex and a boy snd countless other things bc of my interests. I'm straight and an lgbt ally who loves marvel and star wars and video games and shee sees those as reasons to call me a lesbian? she also says I dress like one but she dresses like strawberry fucking shortcake if she had no style whatsoever. I wear movie referenced t shirts and hoodies and I like to think I have some sense of style but she says I dress like a boy bc of ONE Simpson skeleton on my shirt. she also says fhe complete opposite if I wear my hair in pigtails, that I dress like a little girl. which is it, sister dearest? am I a boy or a little girl?
anyway, as I was saying she starts watching stuff at full blast, I don't say anything I just put my headphones on. then she starts getting mad. oh she HATES my headphones, she thinks its the most disrespectful thing. I have a lot of anxiety when I leave the house so I have my headphones on all the time, music calms me and I listen to music every day and it's just something i do but she hates it. I dont see y it's different for me to wear my headphones if I'm not gonna talk to anyone anyway. she feels the same when I read around her. I love books, I read a lot and its yet AHOTHER thing she hates about me.
so she starts getting angrier and telling me to take my headphones off but by this point I'm done with the movie anyway and I wanna be alone so I get up to leave. I say I'm not dealing with this shit. she then puts her feet up on the pouffe (which I let her use bc theres only one and she was complaining) to block me. I tell her to move and she says to stay and watch the movie with her. now it's her words that I understand what she rly means. she wants me to sit and watch the movie with her for some reason. but no, I'm not dealing with her bullshit. she keeps blocking me and then she gets up and im just trying to get past without hurting her but shes not ceasing.
bc forcing someone to sit with u and bossing them around is the best way to bond with ur little sister ofc.
eventually I start shouting at her bc ik she'll start to panic if our grandpa will hear. (She's so fake in front of him too, all smiley and happy when inside she hates him. shes like that with every human in the planet besides me mum, dad and nana. she just openly hates me and dad. it's interesting to me how she hates everyone and makes fun of ppl online but yet she still worries about hurting their feelings more than anyone ik. she can be empathetic in that sense at least. it's hard for someone who sees the world in black and white tho, as she does. I just see fifty Shades of grey (hah).
but my shouting isn't working so I'm done and I shove her out the way and ofc that rly ticks her off. I don't understand what she expects me to do, but she gets rly angry when it happens. she shouts for mum ofc. I grab all my stuff so she csnt do anything to it (she breaks my lego regularly and changes the bookmarked pages in my books a lot and searches thru my phone and texts if I leave anything around her). im just heading to the backyard so I'm away from her, I thought about leaving the house entirely but we were gonna leave soon anyway (or i was told).
I walk past mum on my way out and she asks what's wrong snd I'm just too pissed off to rly explain anything so I just say my sister js crazy or something like that. I sit outside listening to music and avoid my sister rhe rest of the afternoon. I knew she'd be talking to my mum about what I did and spinning it so I was the hateful sister who doesnt want to watch a movie with her which yeah is technically true but how is it fair that she treats me like that still? am I supposed to just let her walk all over me?
my mum thinks that. she tells me to give in and just agree to anything and just do whatever my sister says. my mum is my sisters slave too. she'll do anything to keep the peace and just agrees to whatever my sister wants. the countless times she gets whatever take away she wants and im left with the leftovers in the fridge bc im the "easy child". Or at least I used to be, fron my mums perspective. just bc im chill and not insanely entitled and demanding like my sister.
so later in the night when we all at home I go to the kitchen and my mums in tjere and my dads rhere too, just eating. little did the man know what he'd be in the middle of in a few minutes.
my mum hasn't spoken to me about what went down at my grandparents, hasn't gotten my perspective but whatever. she asks me what was so wrong with watching a movie with my sister. I didn't even stop watching the movie bc of my sister, I just had it on while I ate my dinner and I told her as much. they always do this, say "with ur sister" when it's just something we just happened to both be doing. they make it sound like I'm deliberately being a dick to her bc im hateful. then my mum starts going off and saying shit like "u watch movies with ur friends and ur father, y csnt u watch them with her?" I didn't wanna say that I csnt watch movies with her bc it gets on my nerves bc my sister csn hear everyrthing in the house, we all constantly aware of that as if she's always listening, its creepy as hell but she's too nosy.
I say that I was done with the movie and she started bossing me around so I left. That's the truth bur my mum was like NO DONT GIVE ME THAT SHIT, U DONT WANT TO WATCH MOVIES WITH HER BUT U DO WITH UR FRIENDS AND UR FATHER. U NEVER DO ANYTHING WITH HER, HOW DO U THINK THAT MAKES HER FEEL? UR NOT UNDERSTANDING HER SIDE
ya know what's even dumber, they use my OWN FUCKING ARGUMENTS against me. I always say to consider the others persons side and to understand everyone's perspective. and she has fhe GALL to say I don't get her side? OFC I DO BUT SHES TOO FUCKING UNBEARABLE
and I never do anything with her or watch movies with her bc she hates mt favourite movies and shows and vice versa. my favourite movies deadpool and j spend mt days watching marvel, star wars, Disney, musicals, sci fi, action, romance, dramas when she watches REALITY TV AND HORRORS.
PROBABLY THE ONLY 2 GENRES I DONT WATCH. I watch SO MANY DIFFERENT THINGS and she happens to watch the ones I HATE. how r we supposed to watch stuff together with all that, and her bloody rewinding and her criticisms? ITS IMPOSSIBLE.
we agree on very few movies and when we do she wants to watch them so much that she thrashes them. now I'm a person who's seen deadpool a million times and I rewatch everything, I've seen the office thousands of times but she still somehow manages to ruin things for me. she nearly ruined fawlty towers.
now on one hand, my sister has no friends and every one she's ever had has always betrayed or bullied her. thats true, mostly. ppl have been horrible to her forever, I understand she is damaged but she takes it out on me. and how can she ever make friends again if they ever make mistakes she never forgives them? I have a friend who ratted me out to the teacher on the first week I met her for swearing bur she's one if mt closest friends going on 5 years now. every friend I have has fucked up before obviously we human we mess up and learn. my sister won't accept any mistake outside of me or mum. my dad has suffered from that as has my aunt and my cousins. they messed up one too many times and instead of communicating with them, she ignored it so it continued and now she'll never forgive them. obviously that doesn't excuse their behavior but she has to forgive or else she'll be alone. this is the only reason y I still give her chances, bc I used to think maybe she'll learn and get better. but she still treats me worse than anyone I've ever known. but I dont want to give up on her like she's done.
when I move out (as fast as fucking possible) I'll still see her but just a lot less. She and I rly don't work well and she hates everyrthing and everyone important to me.
Still tho, perhaps I am the asshole here. Idk rly. I don't treat her perfectly either, I try tho. And I apologise and I mean it. When she apologises she just means she's sorry she's hurt me, not for what she djd. Bc she does it again and again and again.

11/20/2017
Log book of Det. Ryan Snow
Case #2798: The Appalachian Murders
The past couple of days are events I pray no one else ever has to go through what Kate and I had. I had her and Mr. Raines cleared of all charges, having found the proof we all needed to end this case and find the true killer. Kate no longer has to go into witness protection and I had given the police a good enough lie to keep myself from looking insane in the eyes of my co-workers. I know no one will ever know the true story or believe it, but I’m writing it out here. It at least needs to be known written somewhere. Even if my and Kate’s eyes are the only ones that will ever read it written out and forever imprinted in our memories.
The morning Kate had run off to the mountains on her own, I had made my way to the Blackwell home where I was immediately met with Mr. Blackwell charging at me and wrapping his large hands around my neck. He was shaking me and blaming me for getting his daughter killed and not doing more to keep her safe. The police who had been called to examine the scene and read Kate’s letter had to sedate Mr. Blackwell to get him off of me, lying him down on the couch, his head resting on Mrs. Blackwell’s legs. Though the woman was distraught and begging the police to bring her daughter back, she still took the time to shoot that cold, death glare my way. The ice in my chest growing. I couldn’t tell these people that this thing had come after me to get to Kate. I knew it wouldn’t change anything. If anything they’d hate me even more for keeping it to myself.
The sheriff was there and he pulled me away from eye sight of the Blackwells, trying to tell me that this wasn’t my fault. But I couldn’t help but blame myself. I should have done everything I could to keep Kate as far from those mountains as possible.
There were no signs of a struggle in Kate’s room and the letter was definitely written in her hand writing. Her father’s rifle missing from the study, a backpack and some food and supplies gone as well. She had only grabbed one set of clothes from her drawers, showing she did indeed have plans on returning after only one night in the mountains to confront whoever or whatever the killer was.
I told the sheriff to keep any police from going up to the mountains without first allowing me to go up there first to find Kate. He of course argued, telling me that he couldn’t break protocol based on any hunches I may have had. However, I told him that I could get Kate back without her putting up much of a fight, whereas she may struggle with a group of cops who didn’t understand the situation she was in. I was close enough to this case to have built a trust with her after all. I was mentioned in her letter about ending this case for me.
It took a good hour to get the sheriff to eye the Blackwells, Mr. Blackwell beginning to stir from his sleep, and allow me to go to the mountains to find Kate. He didn’t bother to call off the search to the police that had already begun making their way to the mountains, but did radio to tell them to not try getting Kate home without first allowing me to speak to her. He then gave me twenty-four hours to find her to which I told him I’d only need at most ten.
Without telling him about the disturbing scratches on my car, I sped to the mountains, taking the same path Kate had that day she took her friends on their trip. The route, as the sun began to rise was scenic. A drive that may have been a sign of a bright future ahead with a beautiful week in the mountains of nothing but nature, was now a reddening sky of horror. I couldn’t understand how Kate felt, going down the same roads that led to her only friends’ fates to avenge them, but the feeling of guilt did weigh heavy on my chest as I saw the signs of the Appalachian Mountain trails grow bigger on the horizon. Guilt for not doing more to prove Kate was innocent, for allowing Mrs. Mayfield for getting killed right before my very eyes, and for Liam for not being lucky enough to save him.
When I finally arrived to the cabin, there didn’t seem to be any change since the first day I was called to the crime scene, the only thing out of place being Mr. Blackwell’s truck parked precariously near the cabin. The police tape was still up, the cars of Kate and Mr. Woolfe still left where they were, the tires still slashed, the door wide open from when Kate, Ms. Greymoore, and Mr. Woolfe ran out of the cabin upon Mr. Billings was killed by an unknown force. All the bodies had been found and were now being prepared by their families to be buried or cremated. Only one body of the five still roaming around to avenge each and every one of their deaths.
I called out for Kate as I made my way into the cabin. The Ouija board was still on the coffee table, the white line of where Mr. Billings had been found lying face first on the floor with his head bashed open remained on the spot. The planchette was still missing. I kept calling out for Kate as I made my way up to the attic, the door left unlocked, using my flashlight to shine down on the white outline where Mr. Steele had been found completely torn apart. To think Kate had done such a thing, I now realize made me look like a complete dumb ass for believing it.
When I couldn’t find Kate in the cabin, I made my way out the cabin, still calling for her. I called out to her, promising that she just needed to come back home with me and we could solve the murders together. I knew it was a lie and that the sheriff would immediately have her take away to some secluded place where the killer couldn’t find her, but it was all I could think of to try luring her out to meet me. Still, she never appeared.
The sun was soon beginning to set as I tried retracing the very steps Kate and Ms. Greymoore had taken to outrun the killer. I had passed the small shrine of flowers and the pictures of Mr. Woolfe where the boy had been found, his face permanently remaining nineteen forever in the photos of him with Kate and their friends. I kept going, trying my best to follow the same path to the cliff where Ms. Greymoore was found, calling for Kate along the way.
It wasn’t until I found the place Kate had buried her best friend that I found Kate. She was on her knees before the rock where she left her bloody handprint, sniffing as her head was lowered, her dad’s rifle in her hands.
“Ms. Blackwell-“ I began as I took a step toward her. I was immediately cut off as Kate jumped to her feet, raising her father’s rifle at my head. I jolted back, raising my hands up to show her I meant no harm to her. “Ms. Blackwell, it’s me, Det. Snow!”
“Detective…?” She gasped, slightly lowering the rifle, but keeping it on me. “P-Prove it!”
“I’m sorry?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.
“I… I thought I saw Sonja…” Kate breathed between tears, the rifle shaking in her hands, “it… It was wearing her face… It had her voice… How… H-How do I know you’re really Det. Snow?”
“You… Saw Sonja?” I asked as gently as I could with a terrified woman pointing a gun my way. “She spoke to you?”
“Prove you’re Det. Snow!” Kate demanded as she stilled her arms, readying the rifle as she pointed straight between my eyes.
“Alright! Alright!” I kept my hands up, backing up slightly as I tried thinking of how I could prove to her I was really me. “I… I, ah… I have… Had a brother… We went to get ice cream together once and… I dropped a dime and went to grab it… I was five… I followed it out to the road and despite how trafficked it was, I didn’t get hit. I grabbed the dime just as a truck was speeding my way and it swerved just before hitting me… Seeing how close I was to death, I dropped the dime and it rolled into the sewer. My brother called me Lucky Dime since then… Saying the dime was lost to me because it did its job in protecting me… I haven’t seen my brother since I was seven and I haven’t spoken to my parents in…” I looked at my watch. “Five years… No one else calls me Lucky Dime… Not even the people at the station know that was my nickname.”
With this, Kate lowered the rifle, her eyes softening from her furious fear to a more melancholy terror. She looked to Ms. Greymoore’s grave marker, her hand print just barely visible In the approaching darkness.
“It… It looked just… Like her…” She sniffed, “it had her voice… Why did it have her voice… Why did it look like her…?”
“Ms. Blackwell,” I soothed, relaxing now that there was no weapon in my face, “we need to head back, your parents are worried about you and the police are looking for-“
“I can’t go back yet!” She snapped at me as she spun to look at me, tears in her eyes. “That thing is still out there and will kill again unless I end it!” She held up her dad’s rifle as if to show me how she meant to “end it.” “I’m not leaving until I end that… Thing that had the balls to wear Sonja’s face and have her voice!”
“Ms. Blackwell, we will catch the killer, I promise, but right now, we need to get you home before your dad ends up killing a police officer for keeping him from looking for you.”
“I told him in my letter I’d be back tomorrow! I’m twenty-years-old, he can’t force me back home if I don’t want to! I just want to stop this thing before it-“
A howling in the distance cut Kate off. Coyote from what I could hear. If I couldn’t get Kate home, I’d have to get her somewhere safe. I turned to begin talking her down and taking her to one of the other two cabins for shelter. However, when I looked back at her, her face had turned to a bone chilling terror I’d never seen on a person before. She looked like hunted prey that had been found by its predator. She gripped her dad’s rifle to her chest tightly, her hand reaching for the trigger.
“Ms. Blackwell, it’s just a pack of coyote,” I tried telling her calmly, “let’s get to one of the other cabins and-“
“No, no, no,” She stopped me as she stepped back, looking around for where the howling was coming from, “I… Heard that same howling just before I saw Sonja! I thought it was far away, but she… She was right in front of me… She… Something was off, but it looked just like her!”
“Ms. Blackwell, you didn’t see Sonja,” I assured her, “I don’t know what you think you saw, but it wasn’t-“
“Lucky… Dime…”
I froze. My blood turned to ice. The fear on Kate’s face grew as she began backing away, her back hitting the grave marker. I spun around to see a figure in the darkness limp toward us, a scratched and garbled familiar voice coming from it.
“Lucky… Dime…” It wheezed, “You brought her… Back… Give her… To me…”
I whipped out my gun, pointing it at this thing that had his voice. I stepped back to stand directly between this thing and Kate.
“Stay back!” I demanded. “Don’t come any closer!”
“Lucky… Di-“
“Shut up! Stop calling me that! Who are you? Not another step or I’ll shoot!”
The thing stopped limping toward us, its body shuddering in place as it stared us down. I took the safety off of my Glock, ready to blow this thing’s head off if it got any closer or even dared using that voice on me again.
“Kate…” It turned its attention to Kate, a completely different voice coming from it, another male’s voice. “Kate… I’m cold…”
“J-Jasper…” Kate began to sob, “Please, stop using their voices… Please stop!”
“Kate… Kate why did… Did you leave me…?” Another male voice asked. “I… I was in so much… Pain…”
“Shut up!” Kate cried out.
“I thought we… Were friends… Kate…” A female voice. “You said you… Loved me… Why won’t… You let me have… Your warmth…?”
“I said shut up!” Kate screamed as she pointed her rifle and shooting at the creature. She had missed, but the thing still let out an ear piercing shriek as it dodged out of the way of the bullets Kate was shooting. It ran off into the darkness, but Kate kept pulling the trigger of her rifle.
“Stop!” I shouted as I snatched the barrel of her rifle, shoving it to the ground before us. “It’s gone, you scared it off, get to the cabins, I’m right here with you!”
I began shoving Kate back toward where the cabins were, the sounds of that thing screaming out in a symphony of different voices ringing out throughout the woods. I shoved Kate into the first cabin we had arrived to, Cabin #1 I could only assume as I slammed the door shut behind us. It smelled God awful, like the smell of the corpse I found on my first murder case, and it was getting darker as the sun began to sink behind the trees outside.
“Detective, it smell terrible in here!” Kate cried out, covering her mouth and nose, but the tears still falling from her eyes were still visible as they rolled down her cheeks.
I pulled her close and kept her behind me as I took my gun and flashlight out. “Stay close to me,” I ordered, leading the way through the cabin, “do not run off or use that rifle without may say so, understood?”
Kate didn’t answer, but I could feel the heat from her body following after me as I made my toward the smell. It was getting worse as we inched closer to a closet door in a hallway that connected the living room to the kitchen. The door was locked, but after a couple of kicks I was able to get the door to swing open, the smell blasting us in our faces making us gag and nearly throw up on the floor. I fumbled around the sides inside the room to find a light switch that I was able to find to the side of the entryway. A yellow light flickered on, revealing the door led to a staircase. I led the way down the creaking steps, Kate close by as she kept her mouth covered with her shirt.
Once we had made our way to the bottom, Kate dropped her dad’s rifle and let out a scream as we stared at what was waiting for us at the bottom of the steps. In a large pile at the corner of this basement room were nothing but skin and bones of humans and animals covered in maggots and flies. Some of the human bodies being small and child-like in size. The missing people who were never found after vanishing when they came to Cabin #2.
I grabbed Kate’s rifle off the floor and began pushing her back up the stairs, her screaming and sobbing all the way back up to the cabin. I slammed the door shut behind us and pushed Kate to the front door.
“We need to leave,” I had told her, trying to calm her down as we made it outside, “we need to get you home and away from here as soon as possible.”
“N-No… No!” She began fighting me, trying to escape my grasp on her. “No! That… That thing is still out there! You saw it! You can’t say you don’t believe me now! It even called you Lucky Dime! It said you brought me back!”
“I’m not saying I don’t believe you!” I shot back. “I do, I saw exactly what you saw, but it’s way too dangerous for you to be out here while you’re the one it’s after!”
“I escaped it once, I can do it again!” Kate pointed out as she struggled against me while I tried getting her into my car. “I’m not running away this time, I want to kill it!”
“God damn it, Blackwell, we’ll let the police handle it! Just because you have a weapon doesn’t make you safe or ready to handle something like… Like that… That thing!”
“It killed my friends! It wants me! I’m going straight to it so I can blow its head off! It’ll come right for me!”
“I came here to bring you back home, not let you accomplish some stupid ass revenge plot! Get in the fucking car, unless you want to end up like those bodies down that-“
“D… De… Detect… Detective…”
A scratched and moaning voice cut me off. Kate and I both froze at the sound of something approaching. I turned to see a police officer stagger toward us from the tree line. I could barely tell who he was or who he used to be, his head held low and blue uniform covered in blood.
“H… Hel… Hel… Help… Help me…" It croaked as it stumbled closer.
I held up Kate's rifle. "Stay back!" I barked. "Not another step!"
The thing that stood before us wearing the cop like a full-bodied suit stopped in place. It swayed where it stood, blood water falling from its head and down to its chest.
"It… It… It's inside… Inside me…" It breathed painfully. "I… I can't… Help… Me…" Its voice then changed to that familiar voice that made my skin crawl. "Lucky… Dime… I… I'm so… Hungry… Give her… To… Me…"
I pulled the trigger of the rifle, hitting the creature in the head, the rest of it staggering backward from the blow. Still though, it remained on its feet, turning itself to look toward us once again.
"Give… Her… To… Me…" It wheeze, blood and brain pouring from where I had shot it, it beginning to stumble toward us once again. I continued shooting, hitting it in the shoulder, the arm, the leg, the head again, but it just kept coming toward us faster, demanding I give Kate to it.
I was about ready to ram it with the rifle, having run out of bullets, when a voice off in the distance made the creature freeze just an inch before us.
"I'm here! I'm here!" It called out in an almost sing-songy way, using the voice of a little girl. "I'm here! I'm here!"
"I'm… Here…" The creature repeated as it jerked its body to look to where the voice was coming from. "I'm here… I'm here… I'm here! I'm here! I'm here!" It began shrieking in a high pitch wail. It sounded like a mixture of different voices ranging from child, to woman, to man. Keeping flat on its feet, its upper body fell forward onto its hands before speedily crawling off like a spider.
We stood in shaking silence for a moment, Kate digging her fingers into my arm while I was too numb from shock to care about the pain she was unknowingly inflicting. It wasn’t until the radio from my car buzzed to life that jolted us back to whatever reality was at this point. I scrambled to the driver’s side, swinging the door open as I fell inside to grab the intercom to respond to the voice yelling for me over the receiver.
“Det. Snow, what the hell is going on up there?” The sheriff’s scratched voice called out over the receiver when I could barely get my name out of my mouth.
“Sh-Sh-Sheriff…?” Was all I could respond with, still trying to wrap my head around what I had just seen.
“Y-Y-Yeah,” he responded in mock shudder, “what the hell is going on up there? I’ve tried radioing every man I’ve got up there and am constantly being left on red! Do I need to send back-up?”
“No!” Immediately, I returned to full reality, finally understanding the severity of the moment and putting that knowledge into my tone. “Landon, do not send any more men up here, call everyone back immediately! I don’t know what this thing is, but it’s too dangerous! Call everyone back, we’re heading back to the Blackwell house now!”
“We?” The sheriff questioned, skepticism in his voice.
“I found Ms. Blackwell, she’s here with me.”
I was met with statice before the voice of Mr. Blackwell blasted over the intercom.
“Bring my daughter home, right now, you son of a bitch!” Mr. Blackwell demanded. “You bring her home this instant before I decide to kick your teeth in!”
I opened my mouth to respond, but the radio was snatched from my hand from Kate. “I’m not coming home until I kill this thing!” She snapped into the radio. “I don’t know what it is, but I at least know I’m not crazy and that it needs to die before it kills anyone else!”
I grabbed the radio from Kate’s hand, beginning to tell her off when a agonized scream erupted from the intercom. I dropped the radio to cover my ears as Kate did, the scream piercing from my car to throughout the forest around us. The voice screaming and crying for help sounded male and it seemed to echo all around us.
“GIVE HER TO ME, YOU SON OF A BITCH!” A mix of the screaming voice and Mr. Blackwell’s hissed out after a good five minutes of screaming before the radio short-circuited and puffs of smoke flowed out.
After allowing my ears to adjust to the sudden silence, I grabbed the radio once again and tried calling for the sheriff, for the cops with us in the mountains, for anyone. When I was met with more silence, I slammed the radio back down on the holder and cursed loudly, hitting the wheel as if it were the source of all my problems.
After a moment to take some deep breaths, I told Kate to get in the car as I placed her rifle in the back seat.
“Didn’t you hear me?” she shot back. “I’m not-“
“Damn it, Blackwell, we have no idea what we’re dealing with, it can mimic peoples’ voices, and it just ran off like a fucking black widow!” I snapped, stepping out of the driver’s seat to glare down at her. “The last thing I’m doing to leaving you here alone and I’m not staying here another second until I can wrap my head around what the fuck I just saw! So, you either get yourself killed out here while I try talking you down this hero complex high, or you’re going to do what I say and get in the damn car!”
We stood in heated silence, glaring each other down before Kate huffed and stormed over to the passenger side of my car and slamming the door shut as she climbed in. I jumped in after her and began driving away from this nutty nightmare I had found myself in.
We drove down the trail back to civilization in silence, Kate staring out the window and trying to keep her tearful sniffs quiet. I had finally begun calming down and was starting to feel bad for snapping at her. She had only gone there to avenge her friends by killing that thing that had most likely killed a whole bunch of cops to find her. However, I still couldn’t just let her stay to hunt it and I didn’t want to stay out in those mountains with some kind of creature that could take the form and voice of someone I knew. I still couldn’t understand what is was I had even seen.
“Wendigo,” Kate whispered, breaking the silence in the car first. She had said it as if she had just remembered something important.
“What?”
“A Wendigo,” She repeated, turning to look to me with wide scared eyes, “that’s what that thing is! It’s a Wendigo!”
“Slow down, what’s a Wendigo?”
“It’s… Oh, just forget it! You wouldn’t believe me anyway.”
“Ms. Blackwell, I just saw a cop being used as a puppet and then run off at inhuman speed on all fours; I doubt I’m not going to believe a single word that comes out of your mouth now. What’s a Wendigo?”
Kate eyed me for a moment before releasing some of the tension from her face as she took a deep breath and began explaining to me. “They’re a Native American myth; it’s believed they’re the spirits of people who would lose themselves in the woods and would end up eating other people to satiate their hunger. I think that’s what that thing is. They can mimic the voices of people who died and use it to lure people to them, they can take the form of that person too.”
“Why does it want female hearts?” I asked, not realizing I had yet told her what my mysterious caller kept asking for when they called me.
“It… It wants my heart?” she asked shakily.
I cursed to myself before letting out a frustrated sigh. “I think this thing wants hearts, but it only wants female hearts. Why? I don’t know yet. But the only other person to be found after killing someone in those cabins was found with his partner’s heart missing to which he was blamed for taking out of her. Recently, I’ve been getting calls from some… Thing wanting me to bring you back here so it could take something from you. It would have taken Ms. Greymoore’s, but you hid her well enough that only the police could find her in time. Now, I’ve been getting calls asking for you and to get something from you.”
Kate looked to me in shock before a wave of guilt twisted her face in pain. “I… I’m so, so… So sorry, Detective!” She cried out. “I… I had… I had no idea you were being… Harassed by it! Had I known it wanted me back and was demanding you brought me here, I never… I didn’t… That’s why it said you brought me back! Oh, I’m such an idiot!” She pressed her hands to her face, grabbing at her hair between her fingers and tightening them around her eyes.
“No, no, no, stop, stop that!” I ordered, screeching the car to a halt, having to bring it to a crooked stop so I could stop her from hurting herself. I snatched her arms from her head and pinned them to her lap, tears flooding her face. “It’s my fault for not telling you sooner! I was too focused on trying to solve this case with the most efficient evidence I could, but that just kept me looking to you as a suspect. I should have stopped thinking you were the killer the moment I got that first call. There’s no way any of us could have seen… This coming… Except people who probably already believe in that kind of stuff or don’t stop to assume a more rational explanation like a cult… I’m… I’m sorry. But, I won’t let it take anything from you, not anymore. I’m going to get you home and then I’ll deal with this with the rest of the police department. You don’t have to deal with this thing anymore, it’ll be my burden from now on. You need time to finally get some rest and mourn your friends with your and their families. It’s already fucked your life up enough, I won’t let it go on making it worse.”
I stopped her before she could argue with me with a wave of my hand. “Your friends’ deaths shouldn’t be your burden to handle. I know you want to be the one who kills that thing and do right by them, but that’s not what they would want. They’d want you to remember them and continue living. They know you didn’t do it, so stop blaming yourself and stop acting like you’re the one who has to make it up to them. I will put an end to this die trying, but you need to go home and be with people who are happy you still get to live.”
Kate looked down at her hands that I kept down on her lap before nodding weakly and letting out a broken “okay.”
“Good, now let’s get you home before-“
My words were cut off when the honk of a car barreling toward us echoed through the woods. The headlights were fast approaching and I barely had time to grab the gear shift to put us back in drive as the other vehicle hit us, forcing us back and forth in one violent motion. It took me a moment to check myself to be sure I hadn’t hit my head on anything or got whiplash from the crash before I immediately returned my full attention to Kate who was kneeling over holding her head. I gently grabbed her shoulder and pulled her up to examine her head. It didn’t appear to have been busted and bleeding, but she was holding the front side of her forehead.
“Are you okay?” I asked her, prying her hand away from the spot on her forehead, seeing that it was beginning to bruise. “Can you hear me? Blink twice if you can understand me!”
“I… I’m f-fine…” she mumbled as she looked to her hand to check if there was blood on her palm, “I… I think I just… Hit… Hit the w-window…” She then blinked twice in my direction before looking to the car that had rammed us.
I turned my attention as well to the car to see it was a police van, it’s front crushed into the left of my front. I quickly jumped out my vehicle and stormed to the van, yelling at who ever was driving the van to come out and explain what the hell they were doing.
The driver’s side of the van swung open once I was near enough and a man in an orange jumpsuit climbed out, staring familiar daggers at me. The moment realization set in, my mixed emotions of confusion, frustration, and fear turned to fury.
It was Leighton Raines.
“Jesus, you really are a shitty detective.” Was all he said to me before reaching into the can and retrieving a rifle out from the passenger seat.
[END OF PART 1]
Part 6