content warning: descriptions of violence and child abuse.
i think the best way to open this is to be clear an honest that i dont have a diagnosed dissociative disorder, and i know the only person who could really determine if i do is a professional.. its something i want to pursue, but the resources are lacking. what i will say is my ability to articulate the situation and my questions is minimal so i may ramble, and i think its important for me to thank everyone ahead of time for taking the time to read this. i want to be as respectful as possible and acknowledge that my understanding is limited which makes finding the right words especially challenging so again thank you in advance, and all that in mind and out of the way heres the situation:
my abuser (who is my dad) pointed a knife at me. its something he did a lot when i was a very small child, and its one of a few instances of abuse that i can recall as a vivid image rather than a general feeling. i hadnt seen him in 7 years and after a year of contact post radio-silence things have been good. i took the time and money to travel knowing id have backup even when i saw him, but assumed that my grown up ass wouldnt be subject to abuse here after we had seemingly made amends. foolish of me, i know. it took all of five days for him to revert to a selfish and manipulative person with the mental strength of a 16yo boy. five days. we got into an argument and he turned on me with the knife, waving it and pointing it at me while raising his voice and in that moment i felt like i had shrunk down, and its like the walls around me melted and distorted to look as if i was back in my childhood home- 6'3" man looming over me with a large kitchen knife pointed right at my face. i snapped, and i can hardly remember anything after that beyond screaming and shaking and looking for my wallet in a fit before finally leaving to go drink myself stupid. and i clocked back in when i was taking the first sip of said drink. i guess what im asking if this sounds like a dissociative blackout? the reason i cant tell and maybe dont think it is, is because i can almost remember the gap, but idk if i remember it or if im just filling in the blanks because the details just dont seem to be there. would that be a grey out? but idek what a greyout really is.. and even if i feel like i know what the details are i cant really draw on or articulate them. its more like a feeling, like i know it happened, but i just cant call on it.
ive been speculating and going from thinking i have did to knowing i cant possibly, and flip flopping for the better part of 3 years now too.. something that keeps happening is i look up about did and find that it autofills my search to things i dont recall searching, and purple links ive obviously scrolled but dont recall clicking. yet when i look at them it feels familiar and alien all at once, and eventually at a certain point a sentence triggers inside me and i finally remember reading the page or article in the past. i really have to pull to remember these articles, and can only recall it here because its happened once again just now. its why ive come to finally ask for some opinions.
this fight with my dad was a breaking point and i havent been right the last few days. not myself. ik thats normal for any fight but i just have this sinking feeling that the flashback was the straw on the camels back for in terms of denial. like i can no longer ignore it because its happened in a very blatant and disruptive way as a result of something triggering a traumatic memory, as opposed to the more subtle manner that had manifested while i was content and happy with my life. ive been successfully living a relatively happy life for years, and my only doubts abt did came as a result of lost details according to my friends recounting events- i simply dont remember as well as other people, ykwim? but this... this is something else beyond simply forgetting. and i see that now.. but does that really mean i could have a dissociative disorder ? idk...
alright, thank you once more if you made it this far. i know towards the end i lost myself and my points a bit.. its like i can feel it slipping away while desperately trying to articulate myself in a bid for help. i just hope i made as much sense as i wanted to 💕

We have put together this Weekly reoccurring Clan Recruitment Megathread and there also is the Diablo4Clans subreddit where you can meet and look for new & more allies.
Stay awhile and listen to find clans to join in the fight against the Burning Hells and the evils that lurk within Sanctuary...
​
The purpose of this weekly reoccurring thread is:

• for Clans to advertise themselves here to new potential members
• for people to find the right Clan for them to join
• and to also provide a few Harm Reduction Guidelines for new players that can help avoid getting scammed when looking for a new clan

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Clan Recruitment Thread Rules
If you want to advertise your Clan in this weekly reoccurring thread,

• fill out the form below and submit it as a comment with the required information about your Clan and post it in this thread.
• You are welcome to add your own fluff/flair to the form to make it more personal, but please stick to the list below.
• ONLY ONE COMMENT PER CLAN PER WEEKLY THREAD.
• Comments that do not include this form will be removed.
• Potential clan members are welcome to respond to your top level comment and you’re welcome to answer from their response.

===================================

Clan Recruitment Form

• Clan Name:
• Clan Description (give us at least two sentences describing your clan):
• Clan Discord (only use the shortened .gg link):
• How members can sign up:
• Why you should join (Give us at least 1 paragraph):

Please note that making Clan Recruitment is only allowed in this weekly reoccurring thread, so that the subreddit and peoples feeds do not get flooded with threads that advertise clans.
However, on the new Diablo4Clans subreddit Clans can be advertised via new threads.

===================================

Harm Reduction Guidelines
How to spot shady Clans and Practices
This section here is intended as a “Harm Reduction FAQ” with a few guidelines on how to spot shady Clans and Practices to avoid getting scammed.
A List of Shady Practices that one may encounters in dubious Clans

• The offering of a services/items/geaetc. in exchange for real monetary / payment is a major red flag.
• Paying for Level Boosts and other services that promise quick progression in exchange for payment - legitimate clans don’t charge for helping their clan members level up.
• Paying for a specific Legendary Item, especially when asked to pay for Legendries that did not already dropped or that dropped while you where not there – Legendries can only be traded in-game for the first 2 hours after they dropped and only with those players that were in the group when the Legendary dropped.
• Being asked or pressured into sharing your Blizzard Account Password, even when the request seemingly comes from an Official Blizzard Account or Employee. Blizzard Employees will never ask for your password.
• (Being groomed or pressured into) paying for a Higher Status or Position within the group / clan, (e.g. like being Moderator of the Clans discord, Facebook group, Lieutenant of a Clan, etc.) and/or having to pay for keeping that status / position.

​
Scams and Shady Practices to be aware of in General

• Everything that requires sharing of personal information, especially credit card numbers, or social security numbers (even if something is offered in return "for free")
• Advertisements for buying T-Shirts, Mugs, etc related to various franchises (not just Diablo), from ads that may pop up, either in the in-game Chat, discord or even reddit, These are scams designed to get your Credit Card Information. ( link to reddit thread that explains the scam <--)
• Suspicious links and downloads from there, as some downloads may include malware

If something like this occurs, especially if your are being pressured into doing one of these things (even if the person is appearing as a Blizzard Employee or portrays himself to be a Federal Official), it is best to just leave and to not argue, as scammers will likely just continue to pressure or trick you.
​
Furthermore, consider enabling the two-factor authentication via the Battle.net Authenticator, as it also is a good additional protection for your Blizzard Account ( Link to Blizzard's Battle.net Authenticator <--)

Clearly massive Spoilers for not only Wind, yet all of ASC, as this is more of a review of the current events.
Well! Upon finishing Wind and realizing in horror I'm waiting till NOVEMBER to finish this, and hoping to Starclan I still remember what happened by then, it feels right to just review the Arc as of now anyways.
I'm likely just going character by character, not literal event timelines. I'll review Nightheart, Sunbeam, Frostpaw, Splashtail, and Squirrelstar! Enjoy.

Nightheart.

Oh boy, this Man was the "Rootspring," of ASC. Really got on my nerves with his hypocrisy and shortsightedness at the beginning when he was still Flamepaw. He was always justified in his desire for his own legacy, but he also seemed to have a sense of self importance and expectations he had not earned. However, as he became Nightheart, things began to change.
I'll discuss the NightBeam/SunHeart ship as one right here, I absolutely support it. A healthy, no bullshit relationship of two cats who genuinely just respect and support each other. The amount of sheer willingness and support between these two cats all the way from book one to five is astonishing. Sun and Night both wholeheartedly comfort and aid the other in times of hardship, and both cats straight up made their mind with Clan swapping with no issue or regret. (Within reason, of course.) They are fully dedicated to each other and loyal to their family. They love and believe in each other, even when some parts of their lives go against each other, like Sun's reluctant attachment to Berryheart, who despises Nightheart. Night never brings her down or attacks her for still caring about her mother. That shows true understanding for who she is as a cat. This relationship I believe also played a tremendous role in Nightheart as a character.
Back to him alone, his connection and journey between Frostpaw and Sunbeam molded him into a loyal, courageous, and downright brave motherfucker and I like the Man. He is upfront, generally sensible in his thinking, compassionate, understanding, and humble, even taking responsibility for his younger issues at times. He has quickly turned himself around as a remarkable cat! As such I said, basically like Rootspring for me!

Sunbeam.

The perfect choice for Nightheart for sure. She's a cat caught in the dilemma of old and new family, new hearts and old, struggling to keep both intact, praying that both don't break. She holds herself together amazingly well, and she had the respect for not only Nightheart, but Thunderclan itself, that beyond even standing up to everyone she knew for Nightheart, she also dedicated her loyalty to Thunderclan beyond Nightheart, proving her change of heart was true. She stood firm in adversity such as Cherryfall with more maturity than I'd have shown that sabotaging cat, and most cherishingly, she held out for weeks and more with half the cats in the Clan and herself dreading if Nightheart had abandoned her, yet not for a moment did her trust in him falter, and their bond seemed even stronger when he returned. She quickly made great and honest bonds with Thunderclan cats including Squirrelstar and Nightheart's immediate family that consistently have hung on.
Sunbeam has shown herself brave, cunning, and sensible beyond average reason. She'll selflessly help cats of other Clans, and is the first to volunteer for dangerous quests and keep Nightheart out of mischief, ha! Sunbeam was asked to prove her qualities, and she has done so with great honor. She is one of the few who's loyalty to Thunderclan couldn't be questioned even after sneaking through Windclan territory to help her family, exiled from Shadowclan. She cares for both ends, yet weighs her priorities with care. I look forward to her development and closing arc!

Frostpaw.

Ah, the traumatized Apprentice No. 99938-something. Well, thanks to her good writing, she's proved to be far more than that. Frostpaw embodies a favorite quote of mine, "You wear your convictions well, they suit you."
Frostpaw is steadfast and bloody well resolute in her quest, and that is so astonishing because of how she began. Frostpaw was an innocent, fragile and scared cat at the start. She wanted Peace, yet knew nothing of conflict. By the end, she kept her goal for Peace, even after experiencing the horrors of conflict.
From the day she lay bleeding on the moor, I saw a fire light in her heart that drove her in spite of her many wounds, mental and physical to distant lands. She befriended lost cats, rival Clans, and through it all, her trauma and experiences did not further weaken or shake her resolve, yet seemingly hardened it in bloody iron. That passive, gullible innocent Apprentice matured in a shockingly believable heartbeat. Through meditation, reflection, and accepting of truths most Warriors cannot tolerate, she earned a self respect and wisdom greater than many cats. Yet, through all the strength and firm nature of her new guarded, and stricter soul, she only gained determination and respect for what she lost, aiming to restore Riverclan against any odds.
From a cat with a foolish blind crush, to wisely sparring in a bloody game with the false Leader, she holds her own with terrifyingly skill. I hardly know if she can fight a single Warrior, yet somehow she seems to be more suited to this conflict than any cat yet. Nothing has wavered her for long, and whatever has, seems to further invigorate her resolve.
Frostpaw has dealt with the betrayal of cats she trusted as family. She has had cats die for her, lie for her, and cats be hurt and broken for her. And she took none for granted. Whenever something shakes her confidence and beliefs, she comes right back to shake it twice as hard. My admiration for such a strong cat is immeasurably high! Frostpaw has suffered more pain and loss than any cat to the Arc yet. But, for all she has gained, partnerships and family now from nearly ever Clan, Tiger, Whistle, Night, she is ready to forge herself into a cat unbreakable. A legendary contrast to her origins, and I am stoked to see how it plays out.

Splashtail.

Ah, this bastard. This cat is basically a real Clan Darktail, but he pulls it off well.
The last chapter of Wind seriously put the last few pieces of his personality together for me. And I actually have a sort of hotter take on his behavior than many might have.
I do not believe Splashtail is outright ruthless and cruel "just because." Partially, I believe he suffers from a form of trauma suppression that is making him this way. We see that Curlfeather was the instigator for this, that Splashtail genuinely just wanted Riverclan secure, and swore he could do it better than it had. He respected Reedwhisker, and he seemed initially disturbed by the idea of so much... ill means to secure his own position, yet also a slight insecurity or distain for Curlfeather's own degrading outlook of him. Splashtail is ambitious, yet in his own beliefs, also highly loyal. I honestly got the feeling by the end of Wind, Splashtail basically had crossed the blood red line. He went arguably insane, as the last chapter of Wind actually hints at, likely due to a form of regret, a suppression of trauma of what he did. Basically he keeps doing more chaotic and cruel things similar to an addiction, because the withdrawal would mean facing the truth of what you've done. It's possible a form of guilt or conscious bore away at his sanity until he snapped it himself.
Splashtail seems to have a warped personal truth that he genuinely wants Riverclan to be... Gods. So powerful, it feels he may want that specifically because he has to give himself a valid reason that all this bloodshed and madness must earn Riverclan SOMETHING, or else he's truly mad. It's a form of self hatred that is twisting his morality, and I can see it in every word he makes. After all, in his own words about the blood red line, "If I'm already staining my paws with blood, why stop at one?" With Frostpaw... Harelight... I don't think his mind is his own anymore. His terror and anguish has controlled who he is now. Whatever sense of justice or loyalty he wanted to bring to Riverclan, is now a demented passenger to his new self destruction. I wonder indeed what it will do to him before the end.

Squirrelstar.

I believe... I was damn well right. People told me her actions in ASC were ridiculous and wrong, hypocritical even. And I thought, "Well, what's the context?" And I was RIGHT.
Squirrelstar has quickly become of the best Leaders I have witnessed.
I seriously think the Writing team created a whole new personality type that finally gives Squirrelstar some serious personality, because she operates as Leader in a way I've hardly ever seen.
She is incredibly thorough and devoted.
Squirrelstar has shown a perfect mix of extreme unrelenting authority that commands obedience, and absolute respect and love for her Clan and family that balances it beautifully. In the same sentence, she'll formally scold a cat for doing something logically stupid, yet also reason and level so kindly with them on an unofficially level. With Night, Sun, Tiger, Wasp, Waffle, so many! Her compassion and control are expertly blended and I couldn't be more proud.
Squirrelstar is beyond correct regarding the Riverclan situation. People said it was hypocrisy, because she replaced Bramblestar when he was too "lenient." But that was a different time, and when she became Leader, she understood.
Bramblestar was traumatized. He would've advocated for unconditional peace, whereas Squirrelstar is advocating for absolute peace through resolution, on the condition that Riverclan is willing to make the leap.
Tigerstar is absolutely justified and partially correct about his desire to just fix Riverclan by force, yet Squirrelstar also has great wisdom.
She cautions that forcibly ripping Riverclan's Leader away who they've scratched and clawed after for Moons without them actually consenting to it, would lead to a useless war with most of Riverclan that would cause immense unnecessary bloodshed thay no degree of power could stop. It doesn't matter how many Clans join, if Riverclan chooses to fight for Splashtail, innocent and misguided or not, Riverclan will likely bleed itself dry like a cornered animal, and Squirrelstar understands that remarkably well. Riverclan needs to ensure it has a proper rebellion in wait, so that Splashtail will be alone in his War; to minimize conflict and waste of life.
Yet, for any who still perceive that Squirrelstar is too reserved, she has wisely shown her claws furiously when threatened. She did everything short of literally skinning that Riverclan party who stormed into Thunderclan camp. She did not give a single solitary fuck what they felt or didn't. She outright made it explicitly clear that Splashtail does not scare her, she's only concerned about needless bloodshed. Not a cat afraid of War... but one who knows how to fight one.
Squirrelstar is beyond ready to cut Splashtail into little pieces for the fish. She waits for Riverclan... and as of Wind... I should assume her final decision will be swift.
Her words, her mannerisms, they're so unique to her. I've seen Squirrelstar use words that Warriors has literally never bloody used. I still swear the Writing team is shockingly determined to do her justice, and I eagerly await her future!
That is all for now!

No sure how it starts It’s a dark night almost like the Addams family gray night and I’m at the bottom of the stairs at the entrance when my brother walks in with a bicycle arguing with my family and they just got back from a trip, I not wanting to deal with it go into my room and lay down.
I’m in my room but it not my real room I’m in another county I think Vietnam idk why but I just knew, its a tall gray brick room with metal supports, metal sheet roof and sharping a wall with the neighbors I see a lot of green vegetation like we’re in a village or some sort. My mom walks in and tell me to clean the room because of all the fruit flies (currently dealing with a bunch at home irl) I say theirs only a couple it’s nothing be worried about then as I finish my sentence one after another start to appear and then I start moving things around and even more appear but these were no longer fruit flys they were like a moth/fly (small and brown) my mom being in the room this whole time. I leave and come back with a water hose and find the my mom had removed the mattress and found what was like a a blue pillow cover swarming with these bugs, I start to spray them and they fly everywhere in the room so I start spraying around trying to shoot them down with the water hose and I sprayed this pipe up by the ceiling and a cloud a dark smoke or dust like falls to the ground (kinda looked like the Smokey effect they used for the death eater in Harry Potter). While I was distracted I hit some vases that was sitting in the middle of the wall me n the neighbors shared knocking some over but one in particular was a vase that was white and pink and had the face a girl (daughter of the neighbors) it was vase they received when their daughter turned 15 or 16 from a quincena. I along with my mom start to clean the broken glass and see out the window a lil old lady calling over some of her family my mom looks at me and tell me to tell them what happen I not thinking put the glass shards in my mouth so I can pick up more glass when I start to choke and the more I try to spit them out the deep the shards of glass go I begin to panick and then I wake up

DISCLAIMER: I am new to this. I am not trying to incite violence between secular groups of Christianity. I am simply seeking advice and help from others who have learned in their walk with God. I am curious and want to learn. I have a lot of questions and only want people to reply who have good intentions to help me understand than to talk down on my faith. This is going to be a long post. I thank you in advance for your patience.
So I’ve recently found my way back to God in a way I never have before. I reached an incredibly low point of my life and He was there when nothing else was. While I grew up protestant and going to church I fell out for a long time. I never really read scripture outside of Sunday school when my family would go, and my brother is a non believer entirely now. I struggled with doubt and fell in and out with my faith repeatedly as my life grew more complex. My father died violently and young a few years ago but he was a believer and I questioned how could my God let this happen. I devoted my life to science and medicine and lost sight of my faith in that in combination with all of this. Yet now, I realized my actions had grown so sinful I needed to make a change and I decided to seek God. Now, for the first time in my life I’m reading my Bible, truly, chronologically. My fiancée is supportive of me and the relationship I’m trying to build with Him but I need some guidance.
I’m towards the end of the Books of Moses but I’ve come to a few conclusions I never have before and not all of them are altogether comforting. The Bible teaches us that Jesus is all powerful, loving, and forgiving. Yet what they don’t teach on Sundays that God, in by that, He (Jesus) is also terrifying. He names himself Jealous in Exodus. He is wrathful. He kills for disobedience and I know I have certainly broken more than one of his over 600 laws in the Old Testament. I’ve repented before the Lord, I’ve changed my life, changed my habits and while I struggle to stick to that change I try each and every day and have decided to put forth an effort to build my relationship with God. But I’m still plagued with questions now more than ever, yet now they’re in a sense of I want to understand rather than doubt.
Am I to follow Jesus or know my God? I pray to God in the name of the Son, but who is my relationship with the Son or the Father? Which is God if not both in combination with the Holy Spirit? When I pray which aspect am I praying to? Jesus taught us to pray to our Heavenly Father in his name but I’ve always called myself a follower of Christ. Yet now in my reading I feel as though my relationship should be directed to the Father though I know I can only know him through the Son? I want to have a stronger relationship with Him, but I feel as though I’m failing through sheer ignorance. I want to be hungry for His word, but I feel lesser that I’m almost burnt out or feeling desperate from the OT. I try to pray but I don’t think I’m very good at it and never know what to say aside from the Lord’s Prayer.
But now with all of this I’m learning that the Catholic Church is the church left behind in Jesus’ wake so should I not be a Catholic if I’m truly to follow Scripture to the letter? But the Bible also doesn’t mention intercession with reverence to saints? I thought I was only ever to pray to God and anything else was heresy? Or for another example, if I repent to the Lord why should I need to go to confession to do so? Catholicism teaches to have a relationship with Mary but shouldn’t that be reserved for Jesus Christ? My heart tells me I should be a Catholic based on what I’ve read but so many practices seem contradictory to how I was raised im not sure anymore.
I understand at the end of the day that my faith is to trust and believe that Jesus Christ is my lord and savior, that through him and him alone is the way the truth and the life and that without him I am nothing. But I guess my question is how do I know which denomination to pick? There are many contemporary practices of some Protestant churches that seem to contradict the Bible in some ways but there are also Catholic teachings that seem foreign or strange to me. Purgatory? Saint worship seems almost like pseudo idolatry? The pope being infallible and a line to the disciples ? I’m confused and right now altogether frightened by the God I am coming to know in my study and want to do my best to Follow his word but don’t know how best to do so.
I just want to do the right thing and feel as though these questions are best suited for a Priest but I’m Not sure how to have that conversation with one or how to even set up a time to discuss all of this.
Thank you for taking the time to read all of this, for your patience with me and my questions, your sincerity, and your input.
May God bless you.

I plan on sourcing all these from nootropics depot just an fyi. But wanted to know if this will be overkill. I also plan on taking these with lion mane and cordyceps, elderberry and B complex, as well as a couple of other things. Just want to know if this stuff is pretty good and worth the price and if combining all them has good benefits or if its not worth it. Thank you!

Tonight my heart shattered into a million little pieces when my husband said the sentence “I hope she (our unborn daughter) doesn’t learn from you what it means to be a woman.”

hello! im currently having problems with a 7 year old im teaching. she took the last eiken 3 test but couldnt pass the speaking part because she had difficulty making her own sentences. she has ADHD which her doctor said caused this problem. she has no problem conversing about daily matters, but when given a hypothetical question she freezes. any suggestions and advice would be very helpful.

idk if these vents are allowed here but idk. im just so done with everything. i have no friends, no social life, no desire to do much of anything, im so shit at "school" that im struggling to do middle school math (im 15 almost 16) and i cant even write a decent sentence because half my life ive just been tossed school and told to figure it out and then i get in trouble for asking for help so i either just didn't do it or struggled through it and now im supposed to be doing more school if i want to try and get my drivers license?? i dont even want to try with my school anymore because im not getting anywhere with it and its not like my mom makes any attempt at trying to help me do any of it. ive been inside most my live just doing nothing so i dont even have any friends or anyone to talk to or who i feel safe talking with, my entire social life has been on discord, not even sure if i can count that because i dont have any friends on there, i used to but i just always push everyone away because i dont know how to be a friend (or a bf but thats a different rant). i just feel so lost in life and like i dont have a true purpose, im never going to be able to get a job so by the time i turn 18 i wont even be able to move out and ill just keep being a burden to my mom. again sorry if this vent is allowed or i dont make any sense.

*trigger warning SA I 32f am a mother of 4 daughters. (13,11,7,11months) And wondering if I'm overreacting over my decision to cut off my family as we are getting closer to my daughters first birthday. For context...2 years ago we found out that my step father had been grooming and sexually assaulted my eldest daughter. Right away I told my mother and did everything you need to to keep myself level headed and protecting my daughter. My mother did not want to believe this and thought I was lying as we have had our issues lately and she thought that I was saying this to keep my kids away from her. But the police confrimed my daughters report of events and had DNA evidence on top of the fact the asshat admitted to doing it during his interview with the cops. He was charged and released as he waited for the court date. My mother still didn't believe anything so I gave her the ultimatum of my kids and me or him but she couldn't have both of us in her life. She said she chose us. I was going to therapy to cope with this and bringing my eldest as well. I asked my mother to come but she said she was getting her own help. I started to distinguish gas lighting and how to create and stay firm on boundaries thanks to my therapist help and noticed holes in my mother's stories when she would come over. She said that he moved out but on occasion we would see his truck outside the house. She would say she hasn't spoken to him in weeks but yet I seen his name come up on caller id. I decided to confront her after she slipped up and said that they were going to the rodeo trip together. She then told me she was working things out with him that he's sorry and just like my husband suffers from mental health issues (ptsd,bp etc) that this was a mental health issues as well. I just hung up the phone and blocked her from everything. She tried still to reach out and dropped off gifts for Christmas and birthdays saying from Nana and Papa ( their nicknames from my kids) which would send my daughter into a meltdown. I reported it all to cops etc but they did nothing. My mother reached out via email asking if I'm done pouting that what he did was not rape and I can't keep the kids away from her cause she had rights. I told her to go to hell that what he did was rape and until she can see that she will never be in my life or the kids lives. After that point I had enough I tried filing for a RO and it was denied - I live in Canada and it's a pain in the ass to get one. I also then called , texted, posted and emailed all family members saying that I cut her out and told them if they shared my life with my kids to her they would be cut too. I had to cut two others from my life cause of that my grandmother and my favorite aunt. Since then court has come to an end as of January of this year and he was sentenced to 6 years in jail and of course sitting in the court house is my mother with him as I read the victim impact statement to the courts. It was the worse day of my life. My oldest daughter wanted a huge party this year for her 13 and I said yes. I sent out invites to all our family and her friends and out of 20 invited only her 5 school friends showed up. I was livid and called my family asking why they didn't show up. I was told it was because they didn't want to be apart of the drama between my mother and myself so they won't come to any hosted events unless I make amends. This didn't bother me till these last few weeks as we are getting closer to other kids birthdays my youngest turns 1 in June and my middle child turns 12 in July. I don't want more disappointments for my kids. Now that he's in jail should I make amends? Am I overreacting for cutting off family for supporting him? I'm still in therapy and I know that this is just manipulation but my heart can't take another special event happening for my girls and them asking why so and so didn't come.

There are definitely differing interpretations of the backrooms and it seems to spark a little controversy so I'm curious what you guys think is the best version;
1) Just the original 4chan post, only yellow wallpapered halls and monotonous insanity.
2) Similarly, Kane Pixels interpretation, still yellow wallpaper but many other anomalies and places to explore and many additions to the lore creating a bigger worldbuild.
3) Early backrooms wiki, handful of different levels to travel to each with differing entities and challenges posing. Kinda what the "Backrooms Explained" channel goes through on youtube. Many of the original liminal images thrown into differing levels with a bit of lore here and there.
4) Community inclusive massive build of the current backrooms wiki. Many levels and entities with complex strategies and lore. Bit of brainrot in there but a lot of cool levels and concepts.
Just curious to see what you guys like best and what you guys like would be the best/optimal version (many a combination of them?). It just seems like the idea of backrooms is very diverse and hard to keep track off who thinks what lol.

Of everyone I've read, the one I'm most consistently reminded of day-to-day is Dostoevsky. This isn't because I spend too much time on dostoevsky (I do) but because the news is constantly filled with what I've come to call examples of "possession" - people acting against their better judgement and often their own self-interest in spectacular ways.
Just from the last day's page from news:

• Man sentenced for an attack on a US democrat's spouse
• K-pop fans sending death threats to media for exposing a scandal
• A man sets a French synagogue on fire

(The news is also riddled with examples that make Ivan's Rebellion pale in comparison but that's for another day.)
And obviously there are the more enduring examples:

• the 'culture wars' in the US
• the partisanship around the Gaza war
• "ideologically motivated" attacks, often perpetrated by marginalised young men
• valorisation and demonisation of high profile individuals
• activism and doing ABC in the name of XYZ

Obviously this topic isn't new to Dostoevsky - Notes, C&P, Demons, and TBK all have some germ of this.
But I was keen to get thoughts on how relevant FMD's work still is, in light of all this. How complete do people think his thoughts are around it (they're not) and where are the gaps? Who else have you read has been helpful navigating the topic?
The obvious gaps for me in FMD's work is his general optimism. Raskolnikov repents, Svidrigailov and Smerdyakov go to America, Demons is a farce, Stavrogin confesses. Napoleon didn't repent and history is full of people who haven't. FMD underestimated humanity's stomach. But also it doesn't always help to compartmentalise on 'ideological reasons' as that line is getting blurrier (kill the rich).
There's the dilemma of being true to oneself, e.g. "to go wrong in one's own way is better than to go right in someone else's" - which I could see many of you appreciate is terrible advice. It underscores the importance of critical thinking but also the relative difficulty of it, e.g. am I really going my "own way"? Moreover, is it enough?
I still fall back to Camus sometimes for his thoughts on this from The Plague - rather than any single sweeping philosophy, he stresses the importance of kindness in the face of the unknown and treading carefully ("No, we should go forward, groping our way through the darkness, stumbling perhaps at times, and try to do what good lay in our power").
At the end of TBK, FMD stresses the importance of the family unit and love in forming a well-adjusted next generation, and others have echoed this (I'm currently getting through Steinbeck's "East of Eden"). This is one that was originally lost on me on my first reading, but I see it everywhere now (youth crime, general crime, terror events, bad manners). "Going one's own way" is important once it's fully formed; family sets that up, and until maturity it's generally helpful to err on kindness.
Then there's the question of education - and I think FMD either outright misses this or glosses over it because he was riling against the Europen intellectualism of the time, but I don't think it can be ignored. Love is plenty but is it ever enough? Would 2 parts love to 1 part education be better than its reciprocal? 9 to 1? Maybe you raise well-adjusted boys who are just less suicidal when they're finally charmed by some smooth-talking heel - but maybe that's still better than an orphan looking for any family they can be part of. The examples above certainly don't come from one demographic.
I'll stop there for the moment.
I realise this is a bit of a ramble, but I've been keen for a while now on getting people's thoughts on how Dostoevsky's thinking is still very relevant today. I think fanaticism is one topic that's still very relevant that you don't specifically have to be atheist/theist to appreciate.

Evergreen, a rather welcoming name. Perfect for a land full of calm, peace and beauty. Evergreen in this case is the name of a vast kingdom. This kingdom is an incredibly complicated but majestic land and its people as well. Now sit back, relax and enjoy as I tell you about Evergreen.
First of all, where did Evergreen come from? Well the most early evidence of anyone living here was over 8000 years ago though if you truly think about it it could be as far back as 50 000 years. You see, the oldest trace of civilization in the kingdom is a large ancient hotel in the center of Heatherlea. No other building outdated this and that record is still held up to this day. The actual date of foundation of the kingdom is completely unknown and absolutely no one can tell when it could ever be because of the incredibly vague amount of information on anything before the recorded history of Evergreen. Though not everyone is so clueless, one person may know the answer on the timeline and that is The One Hundred.
You may be asking who this One Hundred person is. He is the oldest person in Evergreen and supposedly some sort of God. Very little is known about him but all that is known is whoever this person is, they are the most powerful in the kingdom.
Now I think you’ve heard enough about the kingdom itself and the basics on it now why don’t we get to work on actually unraveling this massive mystery. But with so many things to explain, how can this ever have an order? Well that’s very easy to do, this is a catalog of everything to know on the topic of Evergreen. Let’s begin.
Cities of Evergreen
Evergreen is the main city of the kingdom, it is used as a capital as well as the largest megalopolis of the city. Though in Scriptorium, the language of Evergreen, they don’t have terms for city, megalopolis or metropolis. So to them everything is a settlement, village or town. In this kingdom the size of a village does not matter only its population and Evergreen having over 1 000 000 people living in it, it’s considered the largest village in the kingdom. Which is quite a fitting label for the capital of such a large kingdom. Though not only Heatherlea contains an important building. Evergreen has the Main Hall and Steffy’s Mansion, both constructions are very important because they contain Aletine. Aletine is a rare gem that will be explained later on but for now all you need to know on Aletine is that it is very rare and very precious. The buildings each have an arch constructed fully of this material.
The whispers of Evergreen
Not everyone in Evergreen is happy with what they know about the kingdom. Certain things are very secretive and though on the outside it seems like a perfect place it is shrouded in mystery and entangled in a web of unknown like a huge tapestry of mystery. The people of the villages are mostly happy with how everything is going except for one thing. They want to know more about the village’s origin. You see, Steffy, The One Hundred, Heathotel and Aletinian do not want too much information to escape into the public’s hands. A disquiet hums beneath the seemingly idyllic surface of Evergreen. Whispers flit through bustling marketplaces, hinting at an enigmatic past shrouded in secrecy. Kept under lock and key by Steffy and the other main powers of Evergreen, the population never ceases to speculate what they could be hiding. Is it a secret civilization before us? Or could it be that Aletine is the secret to the lost time? No matter what the citizens say not one word has been spoken by anyone in control. And there is a good reason behind all of that which will be explained later on.
Architecture and style of Evergreen and it’s settlements
A warped image of Evergreen is fabricated when you dig deeper than what’s on the idyllic surface of Evergreen. But the kingdom is still a majestic land. Its architecture is primarily biomimicry as the villagers are very connected to their surroundings and the flora that they share the world with. The respect for nature in Evergreen is reflected everywhere, in the architecture, in the culture, celebrations and many more subtle depictions. The style that the land has adopted over the millenia is a very calming one, they believe in living life to its fullest so the architects try to make things as pleasant to live in as possible in almost every way possible. You will never find any hostile architecture in the city as its capital status means that it must show a good example for the other settlements to follow. However, the pervasive calmness of Evergreen's architecture raises questions. Could this serene aesthetic be a deliberate ploy? Is biomimicry a way to mask the secrets hidden beneath the tranquil surface? The One Hundred, with their knowledge of the lost civilization and the interdimensional threat, may have a vested interest in maintaining this facade of idyllic peace. Steffy, with his atmosphirec gem of unknown origin, might also find solace in the calming influence of these biomimicry structures. No one can know for sure but until more is learned why not enjoy centuries of perfected design and let the peacefulness wash over you as you stroll through the markets and quiet neighborhoods of the town.
The rest of the settlements
Evergreen does not have that many large towns, only about 4 main ones, Evergreen, Azalea, Heatherlea and Islafield. Those main towns are surrounded by much smaller ones but the main focus is on the four towns above.
Islafield
Islafield is, as the name suggests, mostly for farming hence the ‘field” in its name. The town is near a lake also named Isla The lake is used for fishing as well as a way to water the crops of the town. This majestic town is the main source of nourishment for the entire kingdom with 60% of its land consisting of fields and crops. The kingdom contains 5.6 million inhabitants which is a vast amount of mouths to feed and according to the way Steffy wants to run the kingdom, everyone should have the same chance with life per se he just doesn’t want anyone to starve or die before their time that is the primary reason why he allowed Islafield to become such a large producer of food. He would usually want people to get their produce from the same town in which they live in though since he has 5.6 million people to feed he made the exception that Islafield can export its harvest to the other towns. Other than the beautiful fields of flowers and crops Islafield doesn’t really hold much interest in the eye of the population of Evergreen. Though it is considered the most naturally beautiful town in the kingdom, its beauty does not help it much with population, it has been on a decline ever since the vault of Aletine became public knowledge. Perhaps the Aletinians, a secretive cult entrusted with crafting tools made of Aletine, might hold knowledge about this strange and sudden decline. Despite the dwindling population, Islafield remains a vital part of Evergreen. However, its idyllic facade now masks a layer of intrigue, begging the question: is Islafield truly just a farming town, or is it a cornerstone in a larger, undisclosed operation of the Aletinians?
Heatherlea, a town of beauty and intrigue
Heatherlea, nestled in Evergreen's north, throbs with a unique energy.This bustling town transforms into the kingdom's prime tourist destination during warmer months, welcoming an influx of 700,000 visitors. The undeniable allure? The enigmatic Ancient Hotel, an 8000-year-old structure, the oldest human-made wonder in Evergreen. However, Heatherlea's charm extends beyond the Ancient Hotel.,underneath the ancient hotel hides a vault. The most secure place in the entire kingdom. Inside of that vault is a supply of Aletine. Since Aletine is only found in that singular spot underneath the hotel a vault was built around the mine to keep everyone out of there given how precious Aletine is.Other than its main attractions, its marketplace features the kingdom's tallest stand, showcasing the rare blue and orange Heatherberry. Yet, the exclusivity of these berries in Heatherlea raises questions. Found primarily in the south, their presence here seems curiously deliberate. Is it simply a marketing ploy, or could it be part of a larger scheme? Heatherlea's vibrancy and tourist appeal are undeniable, but a disquieting question lingers: is it a genuine haven, or a meticulously crafted facade designed to distract from the secrets buried beneath the surface?
Azalea, a town shrouded in floral mystery
Azalea is known for one reason, if you look closely at its name you will notice that it contains the name of a flower. Azalea is named after the rhododendron by the same name, Azalea. This specific flower only grows in the town for unknown reasons and once again the reason for the flower's appearance in this one part of the kingdom is gatekeeped by the main powers The One Hundred, Steffy with his atmosphirec gem, and the Aletinians, each with their vested interests in the mysteries of Evergreen, all seem particularly invested in keeping the reason for the Azalea's exclusivity under wraps. Intriguingly, Azalea attracts a disproportionate number of Aletine sellers, who use the flower's beauty to showcase their wares. Why this specific town, rather than a more prominent location? Could there be a connection between the Azalea's unique properties and the Aletine gem? The motives of the sellers remain shrouded in secrecy, adding another layer to the mysteries swirling around Azalea and deepen the mystery of Evergreen.
Shadows in Evergreen: Unveiling the Kingdom's Cults
Evergreen's power structure extends beyond the readily apparent figures like Steffy and The One Hundred. Shrouded in secrecy, a network of cults weaves its influence through the kingdom. While some, like the Aletinians, maintain a relatively benign presence, crafting tools from the enigmatic Aletine, others operate with a more veiled agenda. The Heathotels, shrouded in mystery themselves, stand out for their potential hostility. Their enigmatic purpose and unknown connection to the Aletinians, an exclusive society rumored to possess knowledge on the craftsmanship of Aletine weapons, fuel speculation about their true motives. Do they cover the Aletine's power for their own gain, or are they safeguarding Evergreen from a yet-unknown threat? The secrecy surrounding these cults casts a long shadow, leaving the question unanswered: are they guardians or hidden dangers lurking within the kingdom's idyllic facade? The Heathotels: Enigmatic guardians of the ancient stone The heathotels are a mostly harmless cult. They are in charge of the protection of the Ancient Hotel and are the only ones who have full access to the vault containing all the Aletine. They seem to worship the hotel itself and treat Aletine adorned objects with the same respect as they would do to Steffy himself. They are highly secretive with the reasons on why they respect the precious stone so much and what connection they seem to have with the ancient hotel. While the other power players, like The One Hundred and Steffy himself, strive to keep the Heathotels' activities shrouded, their efforts only heighten the intrigue. This raises the question, if the Heathotels are truly a benign force, why such a concerted effort to conceal their practices? The Heathotels' enigmatic presence throws a long shadow, leaving the question unanswered: are they protectors of the Aletine and the Ancient Hotel, or are they guardians of a far deeper secret? The Aletinians: Sworn Crafters of Aletine Wonders Among Evergreen's enigmatic factions, the Aletinians occupy a distinct position. Eschewing the rigid structure of traditional cults, they follow a oath instead of a set of rules.The specifics of this oath remain a closely guarded secret, fueling endless whispers and speculation. The Aletinians, as their name suggests, possess a unique bond with Aletine. Interestingly they do not worship the Aletine but instead they treat it with reverence, viewing it less as an object and more as a potent material.The true purpose of the Aletinians is to forge everything that is created out of Aletine. They are hand picked, allegedly to safeguard the kingdom's precious Aletine supply, to ensure the safety of the kingdom’s supply of this majestic gem they can only be of a certain sanity. Once again the villagers have their own theories, whispers abound about an Aletine-infused substance used in the selection process, a method to ensure only the "worthy" wield the gem's power.Though to be granted the incredible privilege of handling Aletine directly is very prestigious as only 30 people have the privilege of handling the precious Aletine. But many things are still unclear with them as well. Why do these artisans operate outside the Ancient Hotel, traveling all the way to Azalea to practice their craft? And why, despite their seemingly benign nature, does Steffy strive to keep them hidden from the public eye? The Aletinians remain a captivating enigma, their purpose and connection to Azalea hinting at a deeper role within Evergreen's veiled secrets. The Nevergreen: Shadows Reaching for Forbidden Power In stark contrast to the Aletinians, who utilize Aletine for crafting, stands the enigmatic Nevergreen cult. Driven by a sinister agenda, they seek to weaponize the gem's power, a truth known only to Steffy and The One Hundred. Whispers abound of their attempts to breach the Aletine mine's containment, a reckless act that some speculate triggered a deadly conflict, the War Of Gods, shrouded in secrecy. Steffy himself, it seems, remains unaware of the Nevergreen's potential role in this ancient war. He and The One Hundred instead attribute it to a nebulous embodiment of darkness. The Nevergreen also strive to make the deepest secrets of Evergreen public knowledge. They are the reason why the Aletine vault became known to the villagers of Evergreen. The One Hundred and Steffy tried to cover it up by saying that the villagers deserved to know the truth of where the Aletine came from. But in reality it was an elaborate plan birthed by the leader of the Nevergreen. The identity of the Nevergreen's leader is a captivating mystery. Villagers whisper of a connection to Steffy's ancient enemy, this enigmatic embodiment of darkness. They are also rumored to have connections to the mysterious interdimensional threat looming over the kingdom, a danger only The One Hundred seems fully aware of. This raises the question, if The One Hundred knows everything about Evergreen, why do they still remain passive? Are they truly guardians, or are they somehow entangled within the complex web woven by the Nevergreen?
Gleams of Forbidden light and beauty Aletine, gem of untold power Aletine, a captivating gem shrouded in mystery, sits at the heart of Evergreen's enigmatic power structure. Its existence fuels whispers, speculation, and a fierce struggle for control amongst the kingdom's secretive factions. Here, we delve into the mystery concerning this precious stone. First of all, what are the origins of Aletine? Evergreen's bustling streets are rife with speculation regarding Aletine's origins. Villagers, known for their colorful theories, theorize that it is a form of interdimensional material, arrived here at the mysterious cataclysmic event that destroyed everything. Rumors abound of a ripped veil between dimensions, spewing Aletine into Evergreen while leaving devastation in its wake. While most of these village tales are dismissed as mere flights of fancy, the recent revelation of the Aletine vault beneath the Ancient Hotel has given some credence to the notion of an extraordinary origin. However, the truth remains shrouded in secrecy. Only Steffy and the other powerful factions possess any concrete knowledge about Aletine's arrival in Evergreen. Unveiling Aletine: Myth and Reality Clash The truth behind Aletine shatters some village myths while confirming others. While not interdimensional as some theorized, the gem undeniably originates from beyond Evergreen's reality. Its arrival coincided with the cataclysmic event that reshaped the kingdom, a truth only The One Hundred truly understands. This revelation validates a part of the villagers' extravagant theories, a devastating event did occur. However, it disproves the notion of a dimensional tear bringing Aletine here.The gem's origins remain shrouded in secrecy, fueling speculation about the civilization it hailed from. Unveiling the Secrets of Aletine Aletine is the most precious and most protected thing in all of the kingdom. The amount of secrecy surrounding Aletine is almost enough to rival the secrecy surrounding The One Hundred. With so much secrecy surrounding the gem you might be wondering why it is such a big secret. Well as explained before Aletine is hidden under the ancient hotel, the oldest building in Evergreen. Located beneath the ancient hotel, the oldest structure in the kingdom, Aletine predates all other known resources. The exact date of its arrival remains locked away in the archives of The One Hundred, who possess the sole understanding of its properties. Historically, they reveal information only in dire circumstances to safeguard the kingdom. Steffy's mansion and the main hall boast massive Aletine arches, a testament to the gem's power: repelling dark energy and matter. Steffy had the arch built in his mansion after the battle with The Embodiment of Darkness. The gem releases an aura around it stopping anything that contains darkness from passing through whatever it is built in. The shape of the arch is also a key detail to securing the room at the maximum. The arch shape lets the aura bounce off of it and spread to the rest of the mansion but in smaller quantities. Steffy and The One Hundred are the only two who possess this key information about Aletine. Aletine's potential extends beyond this defensive ability. Could it hold further, untapped properties? The possibility of weaponizing this powerful gem remains a question with potentially far-reaching consequences. Aletine’s connections Aletine is not only known to Steffy and The One Hundred. The public knows about this gem as well but so do all the cults in Evergreen. The Heathotels’s archives contain the largest collection of knowledge on Aletine other than what Steffy and The One Hundred know. A single, crucial truth about Aletine's connection to an interdimensional entity eludes even Steffy. Only The One Hundred and the enigmatic leader of the Heathotels are privy to this knowledge. Aletine is connected to some other worldly being. Since its roots can be traced to outside of Evergreen’s world, there must be some other civilisation that made contact with the gem before the Great End. Another thing to take into perspective is that Aletine is one of the oldest substances in the world. Its age could suggest a lost civilization predating the cataclysmic "Great End." Could this civilization have been the first to harness Aletine's power? The gem's connection to another world fuels this speculation. Aletine has undoubtedly passed through countless hands over millennia. Are the Aletinians, with their oath of secrecy, truly in control? Or is Steffy merely a pawn in a larger game? Perhaps a hidden organization, like a rogue faction within The One Hundred or a descendant of the lost civilization, manipulates events from the shadows. The question of who truly controls Aletine lies at the heart of Evergreen's mysteries. Aletine’s potentials Aletine reigns supreme as Evergreen's most potent gem, rivaled only by the enigmatic atmospheric gem. It has many magical properties,Its most celebrated property being the fact that it can repel dark energy and dark matter which came in handy during the War Of Gods. It can also be used for a multitude of different things. One of the most outstanding creations with Aletine is the arches in the Main hall and Steffy’s mansion. They are guarding the archives which contain precious and secretive documents on Evergreen as well as artifacts that have not been exposed to the public. With so many possible uses for Aletine only a select few are actually used. The Aletinians have been told only 6 times in the last century to forge weapons out of Aletine. With those orders coming straight from Steffy himself. With the looming interdimensional threat it is highly likely that a war will start in the next millennium. Who will be the 2 sides is still a mystery. Steffy is also worried about a rebellion, Aletine has caused unrest in the villages which have caused small riots and raids of the libraries and archives yet all of them end in failure. It is another very likely possibility that a civil war will start in the next few hundred years. The main powers may be aware of this and are preparing to defend themselves if this possibility becomes a reality. Yet, the question lingers: with Aletine's apparent defensive capabilities and no documented harm to Evergreen, why such secrecy? Are the powers hiding something more sinister? Could they be preparing for a threat far greater than a civil war, a threat hinted at by the whispers of an interdimensional entity connected to Aletine? Lempty, a gem of mysterious beauty Lempty gems, with their captivating light blue hue and characteristically rough, quadrilateral edges, are a ubiquitous presence in Evergreen. Lempty is not much of a very interesting gem. It is mostly used for decorative purposes and not very much in weapon smithing.Though it has a lack of properties, It has very famous use, Steffy himself has a 5000 year old Lempty encrusted egg. It is originally made out of the bedrock of Evergreen, Eslud, with a few pieces of Lempty embedded in it’s surface. Even with such a useless facade with no redeeming qualities, it is still widely used in architecture especially in the northern villages to portray the cold and the snow that those villages usually experience. Lempty can be found in almost every mine in Evergreen, since it is very widespread it has a very small value. Compared to Aletine it is 7 000 000x less valuable. Since it is so cheap it can be found in almost every piece of jewelry and almost every building contains even a bit of Lempty. Rumors of Lempty's untapped potential for healing pique curiosity. Though currently as mere folklore, such mystery raises intriguing questions. Is Lempty truly just a decorative gem, or is there more to its story? Perhaps Steffy's undying devotion to the Lempty egg holds the key to unlocking its secrets. The parasitic presence of Lempty throughout Evergreen hints at a potential significance waiting to be discovered. Eslud, the foundation of Evergreen Eslud reigns supreme as the most common stone in Evergreen. It literally forms the foundation of the world, as the very mines themselves are carved from this versatile material. Eslud is used most commonly in construction since it can resist high temperatures and immense amounts of pressure. The only interesting property of Eslud is that no matter how much pressure is on it, it stays flexible allowing for buildings made out of it to withstand high winds and earth-shattering quakes. It is also the stone of choice when making heirlooms since it can withstand so much damage keeping the heirloom good as new for generations. The most famous example of this is the 3000 year old Eslud box that has been passed down as the Retule family heirloom. More than just a common stone, Eslud embodies the resilience and unwavering spirit that lies at the heart of Evergreen itself. Atmospheric gem, a power of nature The atmospheric gem is the true rarest gem in Evergreen as it is only found in one place, on the tip of Steffy’s magical staff. It has the power to control the atmosphere hence the name atmospheric gem, thanks to its power to control the atmosphere, Steffy chose this gem as his crystal of choice to harness its magical properties. Though Steffy never found this gem in nature since it is a mix between Aletine, Lempty and Celusi. The exact process of how the Atmospheric gem came into existence is still a closely guarded secret with only Steffy and The One Hundred knowing how the gem was fabricated. The exact origins of the Atmospheric Gem remain a closely guarded secret. While Steffy acknowledges the possibility of finding such a gem naturally in a faraway corner of the universe, he downplays the chances of it existing on Evergreen. It takes intense heat and pressure to let it form correctly and there were many failed attempts to create Atmopsheric with the failures themselves playing a crucial role in the final product. It is quite obvious what Atmospheric does, however, how it achieves this control remains a mystery. Steffy and The One Hundred keep the details shrouded in secrecy. This secrecy fuels speculation: what truly powers the gem, and what drove Steffy to dedicate over a century to crafting it for a seemingly limited ability to control the weather? Could there be a grander purpose behind its creation, a power yet to be revealed? Celusi, the geriatric gem of Tyrlosuh Celusi is one of the rarest gems in the kingdom rivaled only by Aletine. It can only be found in Heatherlea, usually near a patch of heatherberry; studies have shown that the heatherberry benefits from the light residue that emanates from the Celusi. The major families of Evergreen usually have a reserve of Celusi to pay the more hefty fines as well as create new heirlooms for each generation. Unlike the highly sought-after Aletine, Celusi possesses no outwardly magical properties, at least to the casual observer. Steffy and the other major powers seem largely uninterested in the gem. Yet, a single, magnificent purple Celusi, a rarity in its own right, resides with the Tyrlosuh family, one of Evergreen's wealthiest and most prominent lineages, containing almost 250 current living descendants and over 10 generations are currently in the lineage which means they’re are 140 year old people in the family. Botinelosi, is the oldest person in the family standing at 164 years old and is the first person to ever use Celusi in the art of crafting. He stumbled across it while mining in the outskirts of Heatherlea near the village where the family originated, affectionately also named Tyrlosuh. Steffy originally seized control of the mine where Botinelosi found it. The quick seizure of the mine raised suspicion on the properties of Celusi. Steffy eventually allowed Botinelosi to have full control over the mine. Rumors spread through the kingdom like a wildfire, Botinelosi's silence on the matter, coupled with the Tyrlosuh family's secrecy, fuels the rumors. What truth are they hiding? Could Celusi's beauty mask a more significant purpose, a power that rivals even Aletine's? Polompty, a concoction of nature Polompty, a breathtaking gem with an allure unlike any other, shimmers with the colors of Lempty, accented by veins of Eslud embedded deep within its interior. It also comes from the same location as Celusi, near the Tyrlosuh village. By taking its location into consideration it may lead you to believe that Polompty is simply an underdeveloped version of Celusi, which is what Botinelosi originally believed when first discovering it in the abandoned Reveras mine right near the Tyrlosuh mine. Polompty was originally put under extensive studies to discover more information on it, all the studies ended up coming with one answer: Polompty is a marvel of nature, a harmonious blend of 6 different stones and gems. Which explains the presence of Eslud in its core as well as the colors of Lempty. Since it has such a strange yet intriguing beauty it captivated crafters's curiosity which caused an influx of its use to fabricate jewelry. However when Lomi, daughter of Botinelosi, became head of the family the mine was closed off to the public and all sales of Polompty stopped causing shockwaves in the gem market, sparking the infamous Polompty rush. The Polompty rush, a desperate search After Lomi shut down the mine, the supply of Polompty slowly trickled to a stop. Lomi's aged father, Botinelosi, allowed his son Bisel to sell the remaining stones stored in the Tyrlosuh archives. With the Polompty market back on its feet, the family had satiated the market’s hunger. However, Lomi had a different vision for the family's future. She declared her son, Utigo, as her heir, bypassing Bisel's claim. Bisel sadly accepted to avoid being ostracized by the family ending the power struggle for the leadership of the Tyrlosuh lineage. The gem market, unable to sway Lomi, eventually turned its attention elsewhere. It wasn't long before the Retule family, sworn rivals of the Tyrlosuh family, discovered a small grove of Polompty near their Heatherberry fields. With the supply restored, markets everywhere flourished and the Polompty rush ended. This new source rekindled the market for three years, until this supply dwindled as well. Now, with both sources depleted and demand still high, a question lingers: Why did Lomi close the mine, causing economic turmoil? Does she possess knowledge of a hidden danger associated with Polompty, or is there a deeper secret to this extraordinary gem's origin? Families of Evergreen, cults in disguise Tyrlosuh family, from gemstone guardians to fallen shadows The Tyrlosuh family is the largest and wealthiest family in the entire history of the kingdom, they originate from Heatherlea and their family founder is Botinesoli and his loving wife Temorla Tyrlosuh who had 2 children, Lomi Tyrlosuh and Bisel Tyrlosuh. Bisel was originally the next heir for the head of the Tyrlosuh family but after Lomi took power as the first heir she decided to declare her son Ugito as the next heir. Bisel accepted his fate to never be head of the family to avoid being exiled by Lomi. With her decision she completely bypassed Bisel’s bloodline from the lineage, completely extinguishing any chance for any of his descendants to ever ascend to the title of head of family. Though this has never been done in the family, Lomi received backlash from both family members as well as the public as this was seen as an unforgivable act of treason to her own blood. With her destructive decision she removed over 30 descendants from having the last name Tyrlosuh. Bisel’s new family line, the Bisenoty, decided to declare a familial war against the Tyrlosuh. Sparking the Biserlosuh familial war. The Biserlosuh Familial war After Bisel declared a familial war against the Lomi, the population of Azalea and the, affectionately named, Tyrlosuh town, started to pick sides. At the time Bisel had the most support by the villagers considering Lomi was the cause of the Polompty rush. Which brought both fortune and misfortune, and had threatened to burn villager’s houses unless they followed her orders as their new leader, which sowed distrust between the populace. The war was not particularly disastrous since it was between 2 armies of around 400 people. Though the amount of lives lost caused an impact in the surrounding area and sent a shockwave in the gem trade market since the Tyrlosuh family were the largest exporters of stones and gems. Both families ended up losing a combined 86 members, 21 from the Bisenoty family leaving only 13 people left and the rest were from the Tyrlosuh family. This disaster would leave over 1300 civilians injured and over 700 dead, it also caused the partial destruction of the town of Tyrlosuh and the complete destruction of the Bisenoty town. Though not only the family’s town were left in ruin, entire neighborhoods of Azalea were utterly ravaged thanks to the supporters of the 2 families. With Evergreen on the brink of a civil war, Steffy himself had to step in and end the war. Though his attempts failed and the war continued for another 2 years before Lomi and Bisel decided to end the battle for the safety of the kingdom as more and more supporters began to sprout and begin fighting in the other towns. With Evergreen on the brink of absolute and utter chaos, Evergreen’s main entrances were shut down and the capital went into lockdown as protests arose, those protests leading into more chaos with the 2 sides arguing and fighting right outside the Main Hall. The Tyrlosuh archives were burned, the Tyrlosuh and the Reveras mines caved in in certain parts and the majority of the Tyrlosuh made jewelry was either sold to another crafter or destroyed entirely sending hundreds of thousands of objects into the Gray Realm causing a widespread jewelry shortage as well as worries on the safety of the Gray realm. After the war ended the Tyrlosuh family was fined 400 pieces of Celusi and their entire Polompty fortune was seized by the Heathotels. Downfall of the Tyrlosuh After the end of the Biserlosuh war, the Tyrlosuh family lost control over the Polompty mine, the majority of their Celusi hoard, their archive was burned to the ground and their hometown was partially in ruins. With Lomi’s dictatorship over the family and her undying hate for the Bisenoty family as well as the Retule family, she forced the Bisenoty family, which was ravaged by the war, to merge back into the Tyrlosuh family name, unifying the rivals and stopping any further familial civil wars from happening. Bisel decided to step down from the lineage and instead become the first person in the history of Evergreen to not be part of a family, whether it is big or small. With Bisel now gone Lomi had no one to challenge her in her dictatorship of the Tyrlosuh family. Until Botinelosi, founder of the family, decided that the lineage had embarrassed itself enough and removed Lomi as ruler. But Lomi refused and since Botinelosi was in his early 160s he couldn’t fight back against her and allowed her to continue her rule. The public had already lost interest in the family and was now fully against it destroying any hope of any new ruler to repair the damage caused by Lomi’s reckless decisions. The Tyrlosuh family, once revered, now exists as a cautionary tale. Their fall from grace serves as a stark reminder of the dangers of unchecked ambition and the devastating consequences of family discord. However, whispers still linger. Is Lomi truly broken, or is she biding her time, waiting for the opportunity to reclaim her lost glory? And what secrets lie buried beneath the ashes of the Tyrlosuh archives? The answers to these questions may hold the key to the Tyrlosuh family's redemption or their complete downfall. Retule family, fruit fanatics or fantasy fighters? The Retule family stands as a beacon of peace in the often-turbulent world of Evergreen. Unlike their gem-obsessed counterparts, the Tyrlosuh, the Retules view conflict with a deep aversion. Witnessing the devastation of the Biserlosuh War solidified their pacifistic stance. They famously disarmed themselves, donating all their Aletine weaponry to the Aletinians. But they still needed to make a profit, so their founder, Ruservi, created the Reveras mine right near the future area for the Tyrlosuh mine. Ruservi was the first person to explore and exploit that part of the kingdom since it was usually used as a tourist attraction for the rest of the towns to visit the lovely northern flora. He eventually discovered a cave which led into a large cluster of Celusi, which eventually led him to create the Reveras mine to mine out this new source of gems for the kingdom. After extensive testing his scholars noticed that Celusi had positive benefits to Heatherberry and enhanced its growth which led Ruservi to found the largest Heatherberry farm in the history of the kingdom. He led the family into a fruit empire for 140 years until he grew too old to lead the family anymore, at his 178th cycle he decided that his son Rymo would become the new leader of the Retule family. This decision came after the end of the Biserlosuh war which started a large change of ruler in many sections of the kingdom, families were giving way to new rulers and the cults were discussing the leaderships. Steffy decided to join in the massive leadership change adding new managers into the departments and a new Head Librarian into the archives. By the end of the leadership changing era Ruservi had already been ruler of the Retule family for a few months, during those few months he had commissioned the construction of a new town for the Retule family and everyone else who wanted to live there. Though this new project was a cover up for a more devious plot, he was in fact commissioning the Aletinians to forge Lempty weapons for his descendants, which caused distrust in the family after news of this plan came into the light. This revelation cast a shadow over the family's pacifistic ideals. Was Ruservi preparing for a war he alone foresaw? Or was there another, undisclosed reason for the clandestine weapon production? These questions continue to plague the Retules, a family caught between their commitment to peace and the shadows of a hidden agenda. Gatosi family, shadows of the kingdom Hidden within the bustling kingdom of Evergreen lies the Gatosi family, shrouded in secrecy and wielding a power unseen. The Gatosi are in charge of the safety of the archives which explains their secrecy and low popularity amongst the populace of Evergreen. They do not have any famous appearance nor have they ever participated in a war since their founding 3000 years ago. Their founder, Guvn, created the family after he noticed the amount of hate that the concealed archives would get from the public. Forever haunted by the everlasting threat of misuse in the archives. He decided to found a new family that would be in charge of protecting these archives and maintaining their secrecy. But considering the fact that Guvn founded the family over 3000 years ago it means he is long dead, he was 343 at the time of his death which leaves him as the longest serving Head Of Family in the history of the kingdom. They originally were treated with hate because the archives were seen as a threat thousands of years ago. But nowadays the archives are a staple in the culture of Evergreen. Captivating the public’s knowledge on what could be hiding in those labyrinth-like buildings. Now, nestled away in the secluded neighborhoods of Islafield, the Gatosi cultivate their unique Yoern vegetables, rumored to enhance mental clarity, a necessity for navigating the labyrinthine archives. While whispers of their reclusive nature follow them, the Gatosis family silently fulfills their role, the shadows of the kingdom their only companions. Fruits of Evergreen, source of nourishment and mystery Heatherberry The humble heatherberry is a ubiquitous presence in Evergreen's northern villages, especially Heatherlea, its namesake. This incredibly common fruit harbors a rare variant, the purple and orange heatherberry found only in one singular farm in Heatherlea. The farm’s owner has kept their identity to protect this incredibly rare variant of heatherberry. The whispers of Evergreen have always condensed into a wide array of conspiracy theories, in this case they believe that the heatherberry is a mystical edible stone that was brought to the kingdom from the forgotten civilization before Evergreen. Despite repeated debunking. A plethora of people still believe that this outlandish theory is true. The purple and orange heatherberry has been widely known for its rarity but also for its properties. The purple and orange heatherberry has been subject to multiple tests, including Eshwar Mestec’s famous 7676AGE experiments. Controversy and mystery cling to the heatherberry, yet it remains the kingdom's beloved snack, a daily indulgence for an impressive 96% of the population.
If you took the time to read everything please give me feedback or some sort of constructive criticism please

Okay, okay I know this has been beaten to death by every person ever BUT I have a couple ideas that kinda further this notion. I know there was that betheseda dev that said the guy in the Fallout 1 intro that was laughing was Nate, which isn't impossible to believe as Nate was in the service in that time AND he was apart of the 108th Infantry Regiment, which was confirmed to have fought in Anchorage during Mothership Zeta. A major reason why America annexed Canada was due to the fact that Canadians weren't allowing as many US troops to pass through Canada, especially during Operation Anchorage. So this isn't too crazy to imagine Nate committed warcrimes during the annexation of Canada.
(I know the bethesda guy went back on this and allat saying it was a headcanon but it still kinda makes sense)
HOWEVER, this is not the only time Nate committed warcrimes. The fact he was back in Boston when the bombs dropped shows that he was likely a member of the Massachussetts National Guard, meaning he assisted in the oppression of Sino-American citizens in Boston, as noted in Kim Wu's notes, many chinese people were sentenced to Concentration camps such as Little Yangtze and Turtledove Detention Camp. This means that not only did Nate commit warcrimes in Canada, he likely assisted in the oppression and genocide of Sino-American citizens in the USA.
My last piece of evidence is more a headcanon sorta thing, but he is married to Nora, who is canonnically a lawyer. It's never explicitly stated where they met, but it's not impossible to imagine that Nora could've been HIS lawyer for his military crimes and that's how they might've met. (I.E She was JAG-Corps).

Why is the "las" necessary? Without it, I would translate this sentence as "You and your friend who don't know English."

For my whole life I've don't nothing but hurt.. Ive typed about 30 different paragraphs but I think that one sentence sums its up. Im to the point where I have nothing left and I've tried everything. I don't even know why I'm putting it up here. I just cant feel any other emotion but sorrow and regret and someone that used to be so happy now I've just became numb.. I think like I might do it.