"...There's no need to pray, it's okay! You're welcome! Ha! I guess it's just my way of being me! "Maui sang as Kokichi and Himiko bobbed their heads to his signature song. They were spending the weekend watching Disney princess movies, suggested by Himiko. Saturday, they watched half the movies, and today, Sunday, they were tackling the other half. They were currently watching Moana.
"Nyeh...hey, Kokichi?" Himiko began. Kokichi shoved his finger onto Himiko's lips while simultaneously watching the screen.
"Ssh!! Ssh!! Wait, wait, wait!! Here comes the rapping part!" he exclaimed. He inhaled deeply and began rapping with Maui: "Well, come to think of it, kid, honestly I can go on and on. I can explain every natural phenomenon. The tide, the grass, the ground, oh, that was Maui just messin' around! I killed an eel, I buried its guts. Sprouted a tree, now you got coconuts. What's the lesson? What is the takeaway? Don't mess with Maui when he's on a breakaway! And the tapestry here on my skin is a map of the victories I win! Look where I've been, I make everything happen! Look at that mini-me Maui a-tippin' a-tappin!' Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, HEY!! " Kokichi burst into laughter. "I LOVE that part!" he exclaimed. Himiko laughed with him.
"That was pretty good!" she said, hugging Kokichi. Kokichi squirmed with glee.
"Nee-heehee...thanks, Monkey Buns!" he said. "That's a fun part! Oh! What did you wanna ask me, by the way?"
"Well, since this is our last Disney princess movie, I just wanted to ask you..." Himiko began. She turned to him, batting her eyelashes. "...which Disney princess do I remind you of?" Kokichi rolled his eyes.
"Oh, brother," he said. "More of this?"
"I just wanna knooow!" Himiko said, nuzzling her face against Kokichi's shoulder. Kokichi sighed and leaned his head back in thought.
"Hmmm," he murmured. "I think you're kind of like Snow White and Rapunzel...and maybe the sleeping girl because, well...cuz she mostly slept. Nee-heehee!"
"Oh! Why Snow White?" Himiko asked.
"I dunno...I guess because she's an airhead," Kokichi replied.
"Heeey!" Himiko said, frowning.
"In an endearing way!" Kokichi said, shrugging his shoulders defensively.
"So...it's a good thing?" Himiko asked.
"I mean, I think it's cute," Kokichi replied. "Plus, she talks to animals, like you do. Except, in her case, the animals don't talk back."
"Nyeh...that's true," Himiko nodded. "And Rapunzel?"
"Well...you're naive, like she is," Kokichi began. "But, she's also goofy and adventurous. You're goofy, just like her, and you can be adventurous, so long as I'm there with you. And, of course, you have magic."
"Well...I do like those choices," Himiko admitted.
"Plus, I remind myself of Flynn Rider, so you automatically remind me of Rapunzel for that reason, too," Kokichi added. Himiko smiled and rolled her eyes.
"Of course," she said. "Nyeh...what about Belle?"
"The beast-lover?" Kokichi asked. Himiko nodded. "Hmm...maybe a little. I guess like Belle, you're mostly docile, but you also have a feisty side, like she does. Especially when she gets fed up. You just don't read as much as she does, though." Himiko nodded in agreement.
"And what about Ariel?" she asked.
"Pffft...from The Dumbass Mermaid? " Kokichi scoffed. Himiko smacked his arm.
"That's not what the movie is called," she said.
"It should be," Kokichi muttered. "She told her dad she loved what's-his-face even though she knew absolutely nothing about him! And to make things worse, she sold her voice to Urkel, or whatever her name was, just to meet that guy, who she's lucky didn't turn out to be some serial killer! The only thing you have in common with her is your red hair...well, that, and you're a dreamer, too."
"Nyeh...and I don't brush my hair with a fork," Himiko added.
"That, too!" Kokichi replied, shaking his head and rolling his eyes.
"What about Tiana?" Himiko asked. Kokichi smirked.
"Nah, you're allergic to hard work," he said.

"Ugh!!" Himiko cried. Then crossed her arms, pouting. "I'd smack you if that weren't true." Kokichi snickered at her. "Nyeh...what about Cinderella?"
"Again...you're allergic to hard work," Kokichi said.
"Well, she's not just known for hard work!" Himiko said. "She's also patient and kind!"
"Well...how would you respond to two ugly stepsisters and a stepmother being mean to you?" Kokichi asked.
"If there's any time to do what Ariel did, it would be then!" Himiko replied. "I'd run away to find the prince!"
"What if the prince is a psycho?" Kokichi asked.
"AND THE STEPSISTERS AND STEPMOTHER WEREN'T?!?!" Himiko exclaimed. Kokichi chuckled.
"Good point," he admitted, kissing the back of Himiko's hand.
"What about Jasmine?" Himiko asked.
"Jasmine...?"
"From Aladdin," Himiko reminded him. Kokichi smiled at her.
"You don't remind me of her, but...I feel like our relationship is like Aladdin and Jasmine's," he said. "Especially how in sync they were with each other when they first met, like when they worked together to avoid the guards. They reminded me of us, because you and I are always in cahoots! Hahaha!" Himiko smiled back.

"Ohhh! I like that!" she said. "Plus, Aladdin is a liar, like you are."
"Can't argue with that," Kokichi replied with a shrug. "Yeah, I think our relationship is like...hmm...what would their ship names be? 'Alasmine,' and 'Eupunzel."
"Eupunzel??" Himiko repeated.
"Yeah, Eugene and Rapunzel," Kokichi explained.
"Right!" Himiko said. "Nyeh...I love those choices for us!"
"Riiight?" Kokichi agreed with a cheeky grin.
"What about Pocahontas?" Himiko asked.
"Nnnnyyyoooooo..." Kokichi replied, shaking his head. "You are not a nature-lover, Monkey Buns! Plus, I just don't see you as a free spirit. You also don't go jumping off of cliffs and stuff."
"Oh..." Himiko said sadly.
"Not that that's a bad thing," Kokichi said. "I just don't see anything Pocahontas-y about you."
"I guess that's faaaiiir..." Himiko grumbled. Kokichi chuckled and kissed her cheek. "What about Mulan?"
"Nope! You're a dishonor to your family!" Kokichi joked. Himiko pounced on Kokichi, pinning him down to the couch cushions. Kokichi laughed playfully while Himiko kissed his face all over. "Hahahaha...ewww, you're getting your slobber all over me!"
"Nyeh...that's what you get!" Himiko said. "Just be glad I didn't tickle you! I know where your tickle spot is!" She drummed her fingers along Kokichi's neck. Kokichi cried out in surprise and scrunched his neck. Then, he licked one of Himiko's fingers.
"Ew!" Himiko cried, yanking her hand away.
"Nee-heehee...that'll learn ya!" Kokichi said.
"Nyeh...well, anyway..." Himiko muttered, wiping her finger on her jacket. "...What about Merida?"
"Och! In yer dreams, lassie!" Kokichi replied in a Scottish accent. "Ye couldn't e'en shoot a target if it was three feet in front o' yew!" He then dropped the accent. "Haha! Try the accent! It's fun!"
"Nyeh...top o' the marnin' to ya!" Himiko said. Kokichi gave her a strange smile.
"I'm pretty sure that's an Irish thing, not a Scottish thing," he said.
"Well...what do Scottish people say?" Himiko asked.
"I dunno...talk about bagpipes and Nessie, or something," Kokichi replied.
"Um...I done told Nessie not to play the bay-agpipes, but she went an' did it, anywaaay!" Himiko said in a horrible Southern accent. Kokichi burst into laughter.
"You sounded like a hillbilly from the American South!" he exclaimed.
"Well, I forgot how Scottish people sound already!" Himiko said, smacking Kokichi's leg. "So hush! Nyeh...moving on...what about Anna or Elsa?"
"Anna, no," Kokichi replied. "Elsa, yeah. She has magic, and she's quiet and hides her feelings, like you used to do. Also...why does Elsa even count? She's not even a princess, she's a queen!"
"Well, now she's the fifth spirit, remember?" Himiko said. "And Anna's the queen, now."
"Well, that's the only thing you have in common with Anna, then," Kokichi said with a wink. Himiko blushed.
"D'oh, Kokichi..." she said bashfully, waving her hand dismissively at him. They turned their attention back to Moana, who was now in the middle of another song.
"...And the call isn't out there at all, it's inside me," she sang. "It's like the tide always falling and rising. I will carry you here in my heart, you'll remind me that come what may, I know the way..."
"...I AM MOANAAAAAA!!! " Kokichi and Himiko sang together, pumping their fists. Then, they started swaying slowly and moving their arms dramatically to the music until the end of the song.
"Nyeh...do I remind you of Moa-" Himiko began.

"Nuh-uh," Kokichi interrupted.
"Why nooot?" Himiko asked.
"Cuz you don't like the ocean, remember?" Kokichi replied with a cheeky grin.
"Good point," Himiko said, kissing the back of Kokichi's hand. Kokichi chuckled.
"Is that all the Disney princesses?" he asked. Himiko went over the princesses in her head.
"Nyeh...yup, that's all of them," she said.
"Good! Can we go back to watching the rest of the movie, now?" Kokichi said.
"Nyeh...okay, okay," Himiko said. She nestled her head against Kokichi's shoulder. Kokichi moved her hat and kissed the top of her head, making her squeal happily. Then, they watched the rest of Moana in silence.

https://www.bostonherald.com/2024/05/18/howie-carr-karen-read-trial-is-a-corrupt-canton-townie-sideshow/
POSTED: Howie Carr: Karen Read trial is a corrupt Canton townie sideshow
PUBLISHED: May 18, 2024 at 4:25 p.m. UPDATED: May 18, 2024 at 4:27 p.m.
Paul Revere used to summer every year in Canton, but he wouldn’t recognize the place today.
One thing, though, hasn’t changed since the 18th of April in ’75 — the locals still love their midnight rides, but with one big difference.
Paul Revere wasn’t hammered out of his mind when he was on horseback, spreading the alarm to every Middlesex village and farm.
Through the first 14 days of the Karen Read murder trial in Dedham, we have learned much about life in the Town of Canton, post-Paul Revere.
As you know, Read is accused of murdering her boyfriend, BPD cop John O’Keefe, by drunkenly running him over in a snowstorm in January 2022.
His body was found outside the home of another BPD officer, who has since sold the house, gotten rid of his phone and dog and abruptly retired from the job, not that there’s anything wrong with that.
How screwed up is this case? Well, the feds are all over it like white on rice.
Read’s defense attorneys have said the G-men’s accident-reconstruction experts have concluded that O’Keefe couldn’t possibly have been killed by a car.
Then there are all those texts that haven’t been “mistakenly” deleted…
The state’s lead investigator is thisclose to the Hibernian hillbillies who are up to their eyeballs in this mess.
According to opening statements, State Trooper Michael Proctor’s first thought when he was assigned the case was to text his Canton high-school buddies. He told them he was already searching online for nude photos of Karen Read.
Proctor is now under investigation by MSP Internal Affairs — if only because it’s the feds who discovered his texts, rather than the corrupt Staties themselves.
How will Proctor do on cross-examination? Do you remember an LAPD detective by the name of Mark Fuhrman?
Back on the stand Tuesday will be Jen McCabe. She’s the one who’s missing one of her front teeth.
Don’t confuse Toothy McCabe with Julie Albert. Julie is the one who chews gum while testifying. Her father’s name is/was Jack Daniels — coincidence?
Julie is married to Chris Albert. He did a six-month state bit in 1995 after killing a Hungarian exchange student in a hit-and-run accident.
His public defender was one John Prescott, whose sister is the judge in the case — Beverly Cannone. She’s a lifelong payroll patriot from Quincy, like the rotund district attorney, Meatball Mike Morrissey.
If you want to hide something real good, just stick it in one of Judge Cannone’s law books.
From her courtroom rulings, Cannone seems to believe that the synonym for “exculpatory” is “excluded,” as in, if the evidence is exculpatory for Karen Read, it’s excluded.
Chris Albert, by the way, is a Canton selectman. As the only jailbird in the fight, he was elected in a landslide. Forget it Jake — it’s Canton.
Even if you haven’t been paying close attention, there are easy ways to figure out who’s who. The townies — which is everyone except the defendant — all pronounce their hometown not as “Canton” but as “Can-UHN.”
Here’s how the examination begins after each witness is sworn in.
Where do you live? Can-UHN. Where were you born? Can-UHN. Where did you go to high school? Can-UHN High.
Have you ever been anywhere else? Yes, once I drove to a packy… in Stough-UHN.
Selectman Albert owns the local pizza parlor. On the night John O’Keefe died outside his brother’s house, he closed his shop, then walked across the street to a local dive where he ordered “appetizers.” That’s how good his own restaurant is.
Then, meeting up with the rest of the Can-UHN townies, the selectman ordered the usual — a round of Fireballs. How Canton is it?
After last call, he offered to take the crapulous crew back to his pizzeria for some free eats. Everybody said… nah.
Almost all these people live, or did live, in the same houses they grew up in, bought by their parents 50 years ago as they fled Boston after the start of busing.
Lucky for them they inherited these tear-downs, because otherwise most of them would have already fled back to their natural habitat — trailer parks.
See, Canton’s on the commuter-rail line, so housing prices have been going up, up and away. It’s only a matter of time until all these low-rent losers are priced out.
So resentment is simmering among the old Can-UHN crowd. They don’t like what’s happening — just last year, their favorite hang-out, Big D’s Neponset Grill, went out of business.
It was the last place in town where you could get a fried-baloney sandwich. Now that was some really fine Can-UHN cuisine.
What must the U.S. attorney be thinking as he watches this legal lynching unfold in deepest, darkest Dedham? The defense has said in open court that the feds already have a proffer — a deal — with the only witness who didn’t go to Can-UHN High.
The hack prosecutor did not dispute the statement.
Judge Cannone has instructed all the parties not to mention that federal grand jury, where at least three cops have apparently told conflicting stories from what they testified before Meatball’s state grand jury.
But the other day, one of the younger witnesses was asked who’s questioned him about O’Keefe’s death.
“The feds,” he blurted out in front of the jury.
Well, what could you expect? He went to Can-UHN High.
This trial is drawing a huge audience. Unlike Trump’s kangaroo-court case in New York, there are cameras in the Dedham courtroom. Live streaming coverage.
And Karen Read is not guilty. Tensions are running high. There have been fights and restraining orders — and that’s just among the reporters.
Aidan “Turtleboy” Kearney is the blogger who’s made the case into a national story. He’s been barred from the courtroom for certain witnesses — the “McAlberts,” as he calls the Alberts and the McCabes.
The McAlbert witnesses begin weeping when they talk about Turtleboy. He makes them want to spit out their chewing gum and order another round of Fireballs.
How dare he call their hero Jailbird Chris Albert “Chicken Parm Charlie?”
I have Turtleboy on my radio show most afternoons. On Friday, he said Jen McCabe has a worse set of teeth than George Washington did.
The most appealing thing about this case is that you can watch it and feel better about your own hometown. In Holbrook, they listen to Chicken Parm Charlie and realize that he makes their ex-selectman Daniel Lee look like Daniel Webster.
In Methuen, they see Canton’s Keystone Cops and think, you know, maybe Chief Solomon wasn’t that bad after all…
If Paul Revere could only see what’s become of Canton, he’d put the spurs to Brown Beauty and keep riding. Only instead of “The British are coming!” he’d be yelling something different. “The white trash are coming!”

You guys know what an alpine coaster is? They are like a small roller coaster you find in the mountains. They are also called summer toboggans or mountain coasters and I think there’s some long German compound word they are called in parts of Europe. They are like a roller coaster, but with much smaller one or two person sleds you just sit on instead of multi-person cars you ride in, and instead of being built with like a scaffolding or a framework the tracks are just on the ground, using the elevation of the mountain. Basically it’s a coaster track on the side of a mountain where you ride a sled down.
They are pretty fun. Or at least I used to think so. They are more “personal” than roller coasters and although you get nowhere near the speed on them that you do on a good traditional roller coaster and they can’t do corkscrews or loops or anything like that the openness and simplicity of the ride gives an impression of a much greater speed. You’re just sitting there with nothing but a little plastic sled and the track between you and the ground as it goes zooming by. It’s like the difference between how fast a go-cart feels compared to how fast a sports car feels. You know the sports car goes faster but the open, simpleness of a go-cart feels a different kind of fast. There’s plenty of POV Youtube videos if you want to get the basic idea of what they are.
I used to love alpine coasters. Used to.
My family used to go to Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge and up and down the Smokey Mountains for vacations when I was a kid and they are common in that area and I’d always rode them every chance I got.
But as with so many things after I grew up and went to college they just became part of my childhood that slipped away. They aren’t exactly common once you get away from the mountains.
Until one cool spring afternoon in 2004. I was in my final year at college and I was driving back to campus in Tennessee after a short visit to my folks in North Carolina. It was only like a 4 or 5 hour drive via the most efficient route and I had no need to be back at campus early so instead of taking the freeway all the way I got off and took part of my trip through the mountains. The scenery was nicer and I admit I liked pushing my Camaro just a little faster than I should through the twisty mountain roads.
Just after lunchtime happened upon one of those little by-the-highway tourist towns deep somewhere in the Smoky Mountains near the Carolina/Tennessee border. Nothing fancy, a gas station/truck stop, a diner, a couple of places selling tourist merch nestled deep in the mountains. I pulled into the gas station. My tank was getting low and I needed to stretch my legs, maybe grab something to eat. It was still early and I only had another couple of hours. I could kill an hour or so and still make it back to campus at a decent hour.
I pulled into the gas station and was filling my tank when I happened to glance across the road and… well I’ll be damned. There it was. “The Blue Ridge Alpine Coaster.” Nestled on the side of the mountain was a building, a mockup of a red barn, where a single railed track that led up into the mountains, where it soon got lost in the greenery. Wooden hand painted standees of cartoon character bears dressed in stereotypical “Hillbilly” getup stood around, some of them holding signs showing the ride hours and ticket costs and other info. I had to admit, as silly as it was, it made me smile.I finished pumping my gas and, well, nostalgia is a helluva thing. I decided then and there I could waste a little time riding an Alpine Coaster again after all these years before getting back on the road.
I parked my car in a corner of the truck stop's parking lot, put my phone in the center console, this being the days before smart phones when people didn’t keep their phones with them 24/7 and I didn’t want my old Nokia brick phone to fall out during the ride, locked my car and walked across the mountain highway to the Alpine Coaster building.
Getting closer, the place was less inviting. The half hearted attempt at a whimsical faux-Americana kitsch was far less effective when it brushed up against the actual decaying, run down wooden building. Hell calling it a building was generous. It was a wood frame holding up a long roof that covered the area where you got on the sleds. The wood boards creaked under my footsteps.
The only real enclosed structure was a shack that held, what I assumed, was a ticket booth. A door on the side had both a single occupancy bathroom with an out of order sign on it. An old Pepsi machine buzzed and glowed next to it.
Still the place looked alive. Ahead of me a bored looking attendant was helping a mother and her young son into one of the sleds while in a bored monotone repeating the safety brief. A few people were waiting in line at the ticket booth. Up in the mountains the playful shouts of people on the ride echoed down. Fond memories of my own childhood rides flooded my mind.10 minutes and 15 dollars later I was settling into the hard plastic seat of a bright red sled sat atop a simple aluminum rail.
I couldn’t help but grin as the sled slowly climbed the track up the mountains, making click-clack ratcheting sounds that hit my nostalgia centers hard. I felt good. The air was cool and crisp and smelled of pine.Higher and higher in the mountains we went. I don’t know if this is my mind trying to make sense of it after the fact but when I remember these moments, the last good moments, I sometimes think I remember a very slight, very subtle pit of fear in my stomach. I honestly don’t know if I felt it at the time or not or it’s just how my mind tries to make sense of it looking back at.
But either way mostly I was enjoying myself. I smiled. I was a kid again. I could hear riders in front of me let out that initial yell of terrified glee you get at the first drop of any good ride.
It peaked. I glanced around. I could see for miles, rolling hills and mountains. I the sled tipped over and zoomed down the mountain and I let out the same happy yell I heard from the other passengers.The ride zoomed down the mountain, catching speed. The mountain forest floor zoomed past, only a few feet under me. Trees zoomed past. I gave out a happy whoop as the ride banked hard around a curve and then looped back under itself.Another dip, another curve. I closed my eyes, enjoying the feel of the G-forces pulling me every which way.
There was no one exact single moment where things started to go “wrong.” The ride kept going. And going. At this point the first creeping thought entered my head.
The ride… was still going.
It just started to hit me… this ride was going on for a really long time. I had taken a dozen rides on various coasters of this type before that day and they topped out at about 5 minutes or so, and that was the long ones. Longer than a traditional roller coaster but not that long. This one had been going on for what felt like 10, maybe even 15 minutes.
I looked back over my shoulder and could only see trees, moving too fast to really get a bearing on where I was at in relation to anything.
I wasn't exactly really worried yet. Okay so I had found a particularly long alpine coaster. At the time I wasn’t 100% wasn't sure they didn’t exist or anything like that. I was a little… unnerved but nothing was happening that was impossible. Yet.
I was trying to talk myself back into just enjoying the ride and stop overthinking it, and halfway succeeded, when out of nowhere I suddenly banked hard, the track jutting out almost over a sheer cliffside. I gripped the sled more tightly as I was whipped around. The ride then dipped hard and picked up speed, barreling down the side of the mountain.
I was pushed back against the seat by the force of the drop. Jesus I didn’t remember them being this rough. I was feeling slightly nauseous. And where had this elevation drop come from I wondered? I was still in the foothills and I didn’t remember seeing anything but gentle rolling hills and light drops from looking at the ride’s route earlier. How the ride had managed such a long, steep drop in this area I didn’t know. . For the first time I hoped that the ride would be over soon. I had no idea then how much I would want that same hope to be true so much more as time went on.
With a whiplash motion I was whipped forward and then back as the ride leveled out on flat ground again, but by this point I was going fast, too fast. My neck hurt from the mild whiplash and I felt sour in my throat and for a moment the contents of my stomach threatened to come back up. For the first, but hardly the last time the ride felt unsafe. Alpine Coasters are tame affairs, much slower and gentler than full on roller coasters but this thing was throwing me around like no thrill ride I had ever been on.
I looked around. I mean I wasn’t that deep into the woods. I should have been able to see a glimpse of something; the highway, the gas station, the tourist shops, the Alpine Coaster office, something, anything. But nothing. Just trees.
I forced back some panic for the first time. I closed my eyes and counted to ten. The ride zoomed along. I counted to 60. I counted to 60 again. And again. Okay this was getting uncomfortably harder and harder to explain.
Suddenly I noticed that up ahead the track seemed to just end, for one brief, terrible moment I thought the track just ended but I was wrong. Almost without warning the track dipped in an almost vertical drop. I almost screamed as I plummeted for 20, maybe 30 seconds before flattening out again.
By this point the voice in my head that was telling me something was wrong was louder and I could no longer tell myself it was wrong. This ride could not have been this long. I tried to make sense of it, wondering if somehow I had gotten diverted onto some kind of maintenance track or, hell for one brief irrational moment even entertaining the idea that I had wound up on an actual train track somehow. But that was absurd. The rail below me was not a train track, it was still just the simple, aluminum rail of an alpine coaster and there had been no diversions or junctions in the track. I was still on the ride, as insane as that was starting to feel. Had the ride somehow looped? Again after having the thought I immediately dismissed it as crazy. There’s no way I could have missed the ride building where I got on. And what kind of ride loops over and over?
The sled zoomed through the forest, oddly never seeming to lose speed despite the relatively flat grade of the track. I cursed myself for leaving my phone in the car and not wearing a watch. I don’t know exactly how long I had been on the ride at that point but it felt like I had been on the ride for a half hour, maybe more. But time is a funny thing when you’re in a situation you’ve never been in. Could have been more, could have been less, at that point.
My pride finally failed me. I started to scream for help. I screamed out that the ride was broken, to stop it, that I needed help. I did that for about ten minutes or so I think. The ride kept going. Mostly flat, level track with occasional mild dips and turns. But the simple length of the ride grew more and more unnerving and unexplainable.
I thought about just bailing out. But the ride, impossibly, was still not slowing down and chunks of mountain rock and thick tree trunks were all around me. Bailing out without risking smashing into a rock or a tree seemed impossible.
The ride kept going.
Up ahead the forest was clearing out some, I could see the forest brightening, more sunlight making it through the canopy.
I wasn’t prepared for what I saw.
The trees stopped and I had just enough time to take in a flat, open area of rock maybe 40, 50 yards at most before another sheer cliff. The tracks twisted and turned and then shot straight down. But that wasn’t the worst of it. For a moment, a very short moment, I had a clear view for miles and the landscape was, to be blunt, totally impossible. Any possibility that I had just stumbled on some incredibly long ride was blasted out of my head. Barren, volcanic looking rock stretched for miles. Jagged, black rocky outcroppings as far as the eye could see. I was in the goddamn Smoky Mountains. They don’t look like that.
I had a few moments for the terror of that view to settle in before the cart plunged into another horrifying drop. I gripped the handles of the cheap plastic sled until my knuckles turned white. The drop felt completely vertical, like I was falling at terminal velocity. I screamed. My stomach dropped and turned. I imagined the sled coming away from the track and me just plummeting screaming to my death on the rocks below. But somehow the ride still functioned. I closed my eyes tightly and just waited for whatever was going to happen. Eventually after several what felt like a full minute of steep plunging the track again leveled out, and I opened my eyes to see myself moving at breakneck speed over that black, rocky landscape.
Now that I was moving on a more or less flat horizontal track again I took a few deep breaths. I looked over the edge of the track. Nothing but that black, jagged rock, almost looking like obsidian, zooming past. I had no idea how fast the sled was moving now. Fast. Faster than a gravity powered sled should be moving. And the track was higher off the ground now. Alpine slides usually stick pretty close to the ground, but I was 20 feet or so in the air, the track suspended in the air, a simple metal tube tower like a power pylon every few yards.
Without any immediate threat and the sled moving fast but steadily and level I was able to think about my situation again, for all the good that did me. Ahead of me the track just continued to the horizon, nothing but the same rocky landscape as far as I could see. I craned my neck to look back over my shoulder and looked back behind me and it looked the same. Even the mountains were but distant specs on the horizon behind me.
This was insane. There’s not a giant seemingly endless field of black jagged rock in the goddamn Smoky Mountains. There’s no cliff faces tall and steep enough for a multi-minute vertical drop. And alpine coasters were small affairs, not major engineering projects that span miles with pylons and vertical tracks. It made no sense.
Sadly it wasn’t going to start making any more sense anytime soon.
The ride kept going.
I was on this rocky landscape for several hours. I feel comfortable saying this because I could actually notice the sun getting lower in the sky. And the sled wasn’t slowing down despite the grade of the track being flat. I was getting cramped from sitting and stretched my legs and twisted my back as best I could. Didn’t do much help. My eyes were starting to get irritated from the constant wind in them. Worst of all it was starting to get chilly. I only had on a light jacket, a windbreaker, just something to keep the breeze off me, no real insulation. I was cold, my joints were stiff, I was hungry and thirsty. My eyes watered and my throat was so dry it was sore.
But none of that was as bad as just how little sense this all made. There’s nothing like this place anywhere near the Smoky Mountains. This was like some volcanic rock landscape. The more I thought about it the less sense it made.
The ride kept going.
My mind didn’t even try to process this. Whatever I was experiencing simply couldn’t be possible. I was crazy. I was dreaming. The CIA had kidnapped me and dosed me with some new version of LSD and I was in a straightjacket in a padded room at Area 51.
The sled kept zooming along as the sky turned to dusk. Soon the bridge disappeared from my view and I continued on along the endless, rocky, featureless landscape.
I sat back against the sled, mentally and physically numb. I was exhausted. I was thirsty. I was cramping up. I was hungry. I had to pee. I held it for as long as I could, then had no choice but just wet myself. I cried until I had no more tears left. Then I just sat there.
The ride kept going.
By the time the sun dipped below the horizon my throat felt like sandpaper. I dug around in my jacket pockets hoping to find a stick of gum or piece of candy. Nothing. I checked again, having nothing else to do. Under a crumpled store receipt in the inner pocket of my jacket was a single old, forgotten cough drop. I unwrapped it from the paper and popped it in my mouth. Saliva flooded back into my mouth and I was overwhelmed by the methanol and medicine taste. It was something at least, although I knew it would be a brief and temporary fix at best.
I felt my eyes get heavy. It was getting colder. That mountain cold. That deep cold the mountains have even into the early spring when the sun goes down. That kind that just pulls the heat right out of you. I shivered. A terrible, horrible certainty came to me. I would ride until I passed out from exhaustion or the hypothermia set in. My body would tumble off the sled to fall and skip across the rocky ground like a stone skipping across a lake, my bones breaking as I tumbled until my body finally came to a stop. If I was lucky I would be killed and not have to lie for days, broken and bruised, on the ground until death took me.
The ride kept going. The ride kept going. The fucking ride kept going.
“Fuck you” I said to the ride, my voice a horse whisper. I pulled my jacket closer around me, for all the good it did. The cold wind was slowly but surely pulling my body heat away. My shivering got worse, crossing the line from a simple normal shiver into those deep, almost violent full body ones.. I wasn’t anything you could call an experienced outdoorsman, but I knew enough to know that wasn’t a good sign.
It was getting dark. There was a full moon at least so I wasn’t totally in the dark.
About then I noticed something. The landscape, what little I could see in the fading light, was changing. It was smoothing out, becoming less rocky and craggy. Up ahead an odd, shimmering light was starting to appear on the ground.
I was over it before I even realized what it was. The tracks were going over a smooth surface.
Water. It was a lake. The odd lights I had seen were the moon, reflected in ripples on the lake.
Within minutes I was out of the view of the land. After the nearly endless rocky landscape and everything else I had seen, it scared me how little I was shocked. I didn’t like how mentally numb I was getting. I leaned over. There was enough moonlight to see the water, 15 or 20 feet below the track. The pylons holding up the track went into the water, the light wasn’t good enough to even make a guess at how far they went down or how deep the water was.I leaned back in the sled. My eyes were red and bloodshot from the constant wind. I closed them. This was a mistake.I jerked awake. I don’t know if I dozed off for a split second or an hour. My weight had shifted and I caught myself as my center of gravity was in danger of sending me off the sled and into the water.
I screamed in anger. A deep primal scream. I hurt so bad. My joints felt like they were full of glass. My limbs were full of pins and needles. I glanced over at the water. For the first time on the very edges of my brain a tiny voice started to speak up, telling me that I could be all over if I just jumped. I shut the voice up, but it scared me still.
I sat there as the ride went on. It felt like hours. Eventually the lake ended in a rocky shore line. The damned ride. There was no safe place to bail out. If the ride slowed down, it was high in the air, if it moved toward the ground it sped up. Sharp rocks, big trees, nothing you could safely bail out into.
I kept having to force myself awake. I kept dozing off. Once I felt myself falling asleep and drove a vicious uppercut into my own nose to stave it off.
I seriously started to think about how much longer I could hang on. The voice came back again. This time I didn’t shut it up. I wasn’t admitting it to myself yet, but I was starting to think about the best way to land that would end it quickly if I needed to.
Something was ahead. The track seemed to dip into the ground. I was too tired, too beaten to even get scared. I was just resigned to whatever happened at this point.
With little warning the track took my sled into a tunnel in the ground. Everything went completely pitch black. After several moments even the dim moonlight was gone.
This was the worst part. The creepy forest, the immense rocky landscape, the eerie lake… those were bad. But this was just nothing. Nothing to look at, nothing to hear, nothing for reference or sense of where I was going. The walls of the tunnel felt like they were inches from me in every direction. The air felt thick, like there wasn’t enough oxygen.
With every moment I was in that tunnel I lost a little more hope. After a long, long time I made a decision. When I got out of this tunnel, I would jump. I didn’t care anymore. Hopefully there would be a spot where I could be certain the fall would instantly kill me. I was done. The ride had beaten me. I sat there, waiting for a chance to end this on my terms. That was all I had left.
Eventually up ahead, a tiny speck of light appeared. I gathered my strength, ready to end it. I sat up, getting my legs under me so I could jump as soon as we were clear. The sled burst out of the tunnel. The dim light of the full moon was enough to be momentarily blinding after the pitch black of the tunnel.. I gave my eyes a moment to adjust.
I was back in a normal looking Appalachian forest. Rolling hills, green trees. The air smelled of pine again. I heard an owl hoot off somewhere.
Slowly I lowered myself back into a setting position, in shock. At first I refused to believe it but the ride was slowing down. I held still, making sure my mind wasn’t playing tricks on me, but no, the cheap plastic sled that had been my world for what felt like an eternity was slowing down.
Up ahead, a structure was visible, peeking out from among the trees in the dim lighting as the sled moved down the track.
It was the Alpine Slide building. The crappy fake red barn where I had boarded this cursed ride so long ago. I blinked and rubbed my eyes, sure it was either my mind or the cursed ride playing tricks with me. But the building stayed there.
It grew closer and closer. The track leveled completely out. The sled slowed down more. Before I had the time to really come to terms with it I arrived back at the building.
The sled slowed to a stop, gently pumping against another sled parked on the track. I sat there for a few moments, gasping in great big gulping fear breaths, trying to assure myself the ride didn’t have one last trick of its sleeve.
I looked around. The place was empty, deserted. The overhead lights were still on and the old Pepsi machine still glowed and buzzed, but the ticket booth was dark and empty, a metal gate pulled down over the ticket window.
Suddenly it hit me that I was free and I practically leapt out of the sled and onto the platform. I immediately collapsed. My legs were jelly and my head was spinning. I tried to stand up again and doubled over, dry heaving. Have you ever been out on a boat for a day and have that weird reverse motion sickness when you’re back on solid land? It was like that times a hundred. My inner ear was literally pounding, all the motion had really done a number on it.
I laid there for a few moments and eventually forced myself to stand up on my two wobbling legs. I looked around, a horrible certainty creeping into my mind that there would be no exit, no way off the platform but to my relief an exit turnstyle, one of those full height ones, was set into the fence that surrounded the ride property.
I went through it and found myself back on the main road. The truckstop was still there, still open but far less busy. My car sat in the same corner of the parking lot I had left it.
I allowed myself one look back, just one quick one. The metal skeleton of the Alpine Slide track sat there, dark and quiet but otherwise normal.
I stumbled-ran back to my car, dug the keys out of my pocket, and collapsed inside. When the door shut I let out a primal scream, the tons of fear and confusion and anger all fusing into a single, raw emotion. I screamed again and again.
After a few moments I felt like I was emotionally at least back to a place where I could act, although I wasn’t sure yet what to do next. Not really knowing what to do I cranked the car. The A/C had been on low when I shut off the car and it came roaring back to life and cold air blowing on me almost sent me back into a full on panic attack. I fumbled with the climate controls until the air stopped blowing directly on me, then calmed down enough to turn the heat on, helping to get the chill out of my bones. There was a half full bottle of water in the center console cup holder and I grabbed it and chugged it. Nothing ever tasted as good before or sense as that few ounces of water.
That was when I noticed the clock on the radio head unit. It was 4:17 in the morning. It had been about one, one thirty or so in the afternoon when I got on the accursed ride.
Over 15 hours. I had been on the goddamn ride for over 15 hours. Over half a day.
I just sat there. Warming up. Calming down. I was exhausted. I was dehydrated. I can’t even describe how my head felt. I probably had at least a minor case of hypothermia. I thought about going into the gas station and asking for help but what would I even say, and more than anything I just wanted to get away from this place. And I just wanted to get away. I wanted to be nowhere near that damn ride.
I put the Camaro in gear and pulled into the street and in panic I immediately slammed on the brakes. I was lucky there was no traffic on the road at that moment. The feeling of accelerating to just normal surface street speeds made me sick to my stomach. I gathered myself and very slowly accelerated the car I usually treated with a very heavy foot up to 30 miles an hour. Every time I tried to accelerate at a pace faster than “Old Lady Going to Church, Uphill” I would have a panic attack. I was okay once I was up to speed, but accelerating freaked me out after being on that ride.
I drove about 30 minutes, putting some arbitrary amount of distance between myself and the coaster. Eventually I made it back to where the twisty mountain road met back up with a major road that would eventually meet back up with the highway. After a few more minutes of driving I saw the onramp for the highway. There was one of those big truckstop travel plazas and pulled in, parking right up at the door. I smelled like pee and I can only imagine how I looked, but I didn’t care.
I kept a couple of emergency 20s in the back of my wallet and spent it on the biggest bottle of water the store had, an overpriced bottle of eye drops, and a huge travel mug of coffee. The clerk looked at me as if he was expecting me to either drop dead or rob him the entire time.
Back in my car I downed the coffee. I put a few eye drops in each of my eyes and sat there as the caffeine took effect until I felt like I could make it back to my apartment. The sun was just coming up when I finally pulled out of the truck stop and got on the freeway. I slowly, very slowly, accelerated up to highway speed, put the Camaro in cruise control, and let the miles start to drift away. I turned on the radio, I needed to hear human voices. Every time my mind went back to what had just happened I turned the radio up louder, eventually drowning it out with painful levels of rock music. I wasn’t ready to think about it yet. Yes looking back I know I was just in denial. I finally made it back to the crappy little apartment I had off campus, a little two story walk up studio. I let myself in and collapsed on the cheap couch. I was asleep before I even had the time to decide whether or not to do anything else. I woke up later that afternoon. I took a shower and ate a meal and didn’t think about the ride. I washed the pee stained filthy clothes I had been wearing and didn’t think about the ride. I went back to class and didn’t think about the ride. Every time I thought about the ride I forced it out of my head. I’m sure this wasn’t the most mentally healthy thing to do but what can you say?
I didn’t forget about it, don’t be silly. This isn’t the kind of thing you forget. One day while looking up something else in the university’s library my curiosity got the better of me and I looked up the Alpine Slide. No website but a few Google Map and Yelp mentions. None of them mentioned anything weird, certainly nothing even remotely like what I experienced. Near as I can tell it closed sometimes in the winter of 2012.
Life went on. I mean, that’s what it does. The next day was a little better. And the day after that a little better. And the day after that a little better still. I met a nice girl. Graduated. Got married. Got a nice house in the suburbs. Got a dog. Had a daughter. Spent a lot of time happy and not thinking about being trapped on an endless alpine coaster.And that was my life for many, many years after that.
Until a few weeks back when as a very different person I found myself driving a boring and safe mid sized family SUV through those same mountains. My wife Carol, 5 months pregnant, sat in the passenger seat, our 6 year old daughter Emily in a booster seat in the back, and Max our mixed breed mutt next to her. It had been a nice pleasant trip, driving back from visiting her folks.
I hadn’t thought about that fucking ride in so long I barely registered that I was in the same general area until it was too late. Suddenly I realized that little mountain tourist trap town was only a few minutes down the road. I swallowed hard and gripped the steering wheel hard. Carol was looking out the window at the scenery and Emily was deep into some kid’s Youtube video on an iPad. I forced myself to keep my breath steady as we rounded the corner.The town was still there, sorta. Time had not been kind to it. The gas station was still there, at some point it had been bought out by Shell. The tourist trap shops were still there. One of them was now a vape shop. The diner was closed, the building looking like it sat unused for a long time.
But of course that’s not what I cared about. A looked over at the site where the Alpine Coaster once stood. It was gone. The kitschy fake barn was gone. The site was just a bare concrete slab with a chainlink fence around it. Faded “no trespassing” and “for sale” signs hung off the fence. A pile of old, decaying lumber that might have once long ago been part of the structure covered part of the old lot. No sign of the track remained outside of some old concrete support posts dotting the side of the mountain.
I exhaled out a breath I hadn’t even realized I had been holding in. Soon the little town disappeared in my rear view mirror.
About a half hour later we stopped for gas. I pulled up to a gas pump across from a massive motorhome. Max stuck his head out the window and started barking at a little white dog, a toy breed of some kind, in the window of the motorhome. Carol and Emily immediately headed into the store to restock on snacks while I fueled up.
I stood there, a half smile on my lips as Max barked and wagged his tail in an attempt to attract the attention of the other dog while I filled up the tank, said dog doing an admirable job of ignoring him.
Right about the time I finished fueling up and cleaning the bugs off the windshield Carol returned from inside the store, Emily in tow, arms filled with two full sized bags of Salt and Vinegar Potato Chips and what looked to be a half dozen individually wrapped pickles.
I raised an eyebrow at the collection of food but knew better than to question a pregnant woman's snack choices.
“Should we take Max for a quick walk?” Carol asked. The travel plaza had a nice little gated dog walking area off to the side.
“Yeah probably not a bad idea, he’s been cooped up in the car for a few hours.” I said. Max, upon hearing his name and the word “walk” , forgot about the other dog and upgraded from wagging his tail to wagging his entire body while making whining sounds and staring right at me.
About this time I became half aware that the big motor home next to us was pulling away. I didn’t think much of it, outside of doing a quick automatic mental check to make sure Emily was well clear of the moving vehicle, but she was safely between me and our SUV, well out of the way.
But that was when Emily looked behind me and cheerfully yelled “Daddy look a roller coaster! Can I ride the coaster?”
It’s cliche as fuck I know but my blood went cold.
I turned around slowly, certain in my knowledge that terrible old decrepit Alpine Coaster would be there, having just popped into existence to trap me again.
That.. is not what I saw. Sure enough there was a coaster there, one I hadn’t noticed earlier because it had mostly been blocked by the motor home, but there it was. It was even an Alpine Coaster.
But it was not the same coaster I had encountered those years ago. That was immediately obvious. It was a small but modern and newish looking setup with neon lights and a bunch of people. There was an actual building where you bought tickets and a little snack stand.
“Daddy! Can we go on the coaster!” Emily asked again.
My mouth made motions but no words came out. I glanced over at Carol, hoping she’d say we didn’t have time but to my horror she smiled and said “You know what? That does sound like fun. Daddy will take you while I take Max for a walk.”
My mind raced, trying to think of a way to get out of it. But Emily was already dragging me across the parking lot to the entrance.
I patted my pocket, making sure my phone was in it. Every fiber of my being was screaming to run away. I slept walked through the line and the ticket booth while Emily bounced happily.
We got into a two seat plastic sled. This one was actually a lot nicer than the one my mind wouldn’t stop thinking about. It had two nice cushioned seats, big grab handles, even a nice rollbar.
The sled started up the track. I fought back the panic. I swerved my head around, keeping the building in my view. I was terrified of losing sight of it. We made it to the top and Emily did a happy squeal as we started down the side of the mountain.
My heart raced. Any second, any second my mind told me we’d lose sight of the building and then the ride would never end. The ride sped down the mountain. My mind tortured me with thoughts of not only going through it again, but seeing Emily go through it. The ride went around a big, banking turn. Emily kept shouting happily. How long before Carol reported us missing I wondered? Could I keep Emily calm? What if it lasted even longer this time? What if this time it never ended?
And then we were back at the start of the ride. The same attendant who had helped us into the sled was helping Emily out. I stepped out. The attendant gave me a brief look but said nothing. I guess I looked a little wild eyed.
I was fine. Emily was fine. It had been a perfectly normal, fun ride.
“That was fun Daddy! Thank you!” Emily said. I forced a smile back. “It was fun.” I responded, hoping like I sounded like I meant it.
I took Emily’s hand and we walked back to the car. Max saw us coming and barked happily. Carol looked up from the pint of Ben and Jerry’s she had somehow acquired and added to her snack collection while we were gone and smiled at us.
“Did you have fun?” she asked.
“It was so fun Mommy!” Emily said.
Carol smiled down at her, but then looked at me and frowned. “Are you okay?” Carol could read my face a lot better than the attendant could. “You’re pale.”
I smiled and this time the smile felt real. “Ya know what. Yeah, I think I am okay.”
Carol looked a little puzzled, but didn’t press it. We loaded Emily back in her booster seat, stopped Max from trying desperately to eat half a discarded gas station hot dog off the ground and got him back in the car. Carol and her small collection of snack food took her place in the passenger seat and I got in the driver's seat.I smiled. I cranked the car. I put it in gear. I pulled out of the gas station and back on the road, this time accelerating just a little faster than I had in years.

So there is a lot here to unpack, and wanted a platform where no one has any personal investment in the results to consider all the options.
The last two years I have worked for a local tech company making decent money, until January of this year when I was laid off (no fault of my own, company reorg) and was provided a healthy severance. In this job market I have been unable to find a adequate job and finally took one making half of what I used to. Our area has tripled in cost of living. My entire family is in the midwest and I have a few opportunities there where the cost of living is cheaper, schools are better, and the career outlook is much higher.
I am personally done with the speed of the city, commuting 1.5-2 hours a day, everything being crowded and none of the jobs paying a reasonable wage to be able to live here. We live 25 miles out of the main city in one of the poorest suburbs, and I still can't afford to cover the cost now.
My wife knew I would need help back in January, but waited until we were almost out of severance/savings to even try to find a job... asked what the bare minimum she had to make to break even (even though she aggressively spends money on clothes, shoes, food and saving is impossible).
I said I wanted to move and was committed to moving us back to my home state. My goal is to eventually own a home, have a savings, be debt free, and maybe have a small amount of land with a little garden. Simple life. She says she will not move to some Midwest no where place with hillbillies. I said I am from there, and she seems to like me just fine. Somehow got into the conversation about why she likes me and she couldn't answer. After 13 years. The best she could say was I like that you take care of everything. That's a totally different topic, but incredibly frustrating for me all the same.
Now, I said I understood that moving would be difficult and so would a change of scenery. I suggested that we give it a try for 2 years and if it didn't work out we could evaluate it then. She said she won't live near my family. SHE HAS NEVER MET THEM! Just one cousin who was our roommate for awhile, and she liked him outside of the fact he was a bit dirty (kept it to his room, we were also very young).
Now where it gets really complicated. She has cheated during the 13 years multiple times, but I chose to stay because I wanted to raise my children and be present. I have given everything to this woman, VSG surgery, mommy make over... and that led to a 2 year long affair on her part. I have always been the one to try and put this thing back together. She gaslight and made me feel so crazy that eventually I asked for a divorce and moved out. I moved back in after a few weeks and to this day I don't think her affair ended because of me, I think it was because he was actually a dirt bag. She even took my kids to his house while I was coaching at a high school basketball game (I have since quit coaching and even the lucrative private business I started). I mean there has been a lot that I have held it together for, and yes, we tried marriage counseling (she lied constantly through it).
We have since worked on a lot of our communication and I feel like we balanced some of the duties in the home (she basically just cooks and I do the rest with her help cleaning every so often). Everything the last year was OKAY until this layoff happened. I spent every minute awake applying for jobs or studying to get certifications to help me get a job.
Over the last 13 years, she hasn't helped much. I have given her every resource and opportunity to though.. here are some of the things I covered for her...Cosmetology school, eye lash extensions, being a personal trainer and the list goes on. I have paid for all of these wants while she has rarely made the effort...it took her 10 years to finally try to use her cosmo license. Now she has 3 clients that visit roughly once a quarter and a part time seasonal job at a athletic wear place.
I share all this, and I am sure its only a fraction and probably scatter brained, to say this. I want to move. I want to be closer to my family. I want my family to integrate and feel the bond of family. My kids to have cousins with close relationships like I do/did. My wife ABSOLUTELY refuses to move. She says I can go ahead and go that she won't stop me. She said I could even take the kids. I said she's being unfair and making me choose between my happiness/comfort and my family.
My thoughts are this, I have given her everything. I waded the darkest waters with her and fought for our marriage when I had every right to leave. I have provided, loved, and taken care of my family. I even navigated a two year long affair... why can she not give this a try for me, for two years? The only family she has her is her mom and step dad. No one else. My kids LOVED it when we went for a visit and they got to meet my family for the first time a year ago (my wife refused to come but I went anyway). It feels like its all about her and never about me.
TLDR: My wife, with a history of being disloyal and unfaithful, refuses to see logic. We can't afford to live in our state anymore and I want to relocate to my home state where my family still lives with a solid job opportunity at a good company. I have given her the world, why can't she do this for me?
​

Monday is the first day of the work week that many people dread. Not all people dread it, but some. Let's take a look into the Numerology of Monday to decode the energy and what it can be used for to work with it and not against it.
M - this is the 13th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 4. The energy of 1 is action and the energy of 3 is connecting with others through collaboration. This puts a focus on responsibilities and for most people, it's a work or school day which connects with this. Although it is about being responsible, it's still the energy of 4 which is mellow and controlled energy. O - this is the 15th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 6 which is about using your creativity constructively to take care of the tasks or duties you need to take care of. 6 is the number of beauty, duty, and routine. N - 14th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 5. This is about using your energy to be responsible and making space for enjoyment while doing so. 14 is a karmic number, but not when used correctly. As a karmic number, 14 is about someone who ditched their responsibilities and now have to deal with some challeneges(5). Proper use of this energy is using it for creative purposes. D - 4th letter vibrating at the purest energy of 4 which is about calmness, caution, and security. A - vibrating at 1 as the first letter of the alphabet, this is about action and energy. Y - The 25th letter of the alphabet vibrating at the energy of 7, but through cooperation with others(2) and compassion for others(2) and with the use of creativity (5) or even humor(5). Big lover energy as 5 can point to romance and 2 can point to soulmates.
Monday full numerology comes down to 8 and 8 can represent long and drawn out processes, wait times, and pressure. The dreadful energy can be moreso due to this 8 energy. People can work with this energy by being patient as 8 points to tedious tasks. With this insight, you can now simply start expected a little time in between things and pacing yourself. It can seem like a long day or your duties may be plentiful.
This is a day best utilized in a constructive (8) way with the use of wisdom and calculation(7). The 7 is the soul urge influence of Monday based on the vowels. 2 vowels A and O which equals 7. Being calculating and seeking depth will allow you to master the energy of Monday. Use this day to get the most done with your projects or workloads.
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Here's what I mean...
Like some people on this sub, I just started drawing. I worked on straight and tapered lines and saw great improvement. (Only 2 days though)
Then I started working on squares, rectangles, triangles, circles, and ellipses. (Only 1 day though). Saw improvement and started getting better.
Then I had a problem I wanted to start moving into 3d and I realized while I can draw these simple basic shapes, I still am not a master of 2d, here's what I mean.
I can't draw a pentagon, octagon, hexagon, heart, star, flower, etc.
I can't look at any 2d image and instantly be able to draw it.
Eg: Vector icons, 2d vector man, Number 2 drawing, Phineas & Ferb, Maple leaf
Sans(not in pixelated form though).
I keep on having this fear that if I start to learn 3d fundamentals and become a great artist(hopefully). I would run into problems due to my lack of not being able to draw every 2d image.
Here's what I mean:
What if I want to sign a heart next to my name or add a heart somewhere in my drawing but can't?
Or I want to draw a star in my art but can't.
Or I want to draw the petal part of a flower but I can't
Or in biology class (when I get to grade 9) we're asked to draw a vector image like person, as shown here: 2d vector man to then use to label some random system in the human body but I can't.
Or in math class were' meant to draw an octagonal-shaped pyramid but I can't
The list goes on and on and on and on, you get the idea.
So I want to know 3 things
Do I need to be a master of anything 2d before I move on to 3d?

• If I do how long should I spend on it before moving on to 3d art? ( I know people might say that depends on you but I want to know a rough estimate of the time I should spend on this if I'm drawing any chance I get, which is a lot) 2 days, 3 days, 1 week, 2 weeks a month.
• If I don't and only need to learn squares, rectangles, triangles, circles, and ellipses. how long should I spend on it before moving on to 3d art? ( I know people might say that depends on you but I want to know a rough estimate of the time I should spend on this if I'm drawing any chance I get, which is a lot) 2 days, 3 days, 1 week, 2 weeks a month.

Also posted on learnart
Thank you for reading this far
Au revoir :)
Edit: Thanks to the two commenters so far I understand I can never "master" 2d just get better at it, but I'm still confused. I guess I'm looking for a more yes or no answer should I move onto 3d or work on 2d a bit more.

For me, the Huntress and the Plague. Once the survivors are fully infected with her vomit, the Huntress can pick them off with her hatchets.
Edit: I know we'll only have five free killers to choose from, but let's say you have access to all of them just for the sake of this discussion if you don't play as the Trapper, Wraith, Huntress, Hillbilly, or Nurse.

Are you looking for unique design ideas for the upcoming Father's Day?! BurgerPrints would like to gift you something special - a Father's Day-themed Clipart Set including designs, icon sets, and high-quality Father's Day-themed quotes. This resource kit will help inspire you with unique ideas to create impressive designs and meaningful gifts to sell for Father's Day! Since it's a large media file, I'll send it to you via Google Drive. Please enter your information in this form so I can send it to you: https://forms.gle/8Rb9jeDkuLFEXbAy7

This is one of my favorite selfies of my eyes but I ruined it when I went through my clipart phase. 😓🙈💔
https://imgur.com/gallery/hMVyV1D

1. Carlin showed off her notes from church this week. Not sure how anything soaks in when she spends the entire service doodling for the Gram… but the notes said we are to “value people over possessions”. Wonder if she’d trade that Tesla for a relationship with Erin? Evan is apparently playing schoolyard games like kickball and duck duck goose on a church league. Otherwise it was the usual constant exploitation from these 2. Their content is Zade heavy since he’s now 2. Layla is getting to be old in kidfluencer years. If you’d like to help them continue to exploit their kids you can now buy Stew Crew merchandise with weird sayings on them that no one has ever heard of.
   
2. Katie and Travis are having a boy. They are “just like” Carlin and Evan… take that as you will. This week was all about the gender reveal and Katie looked at the camera with a straight face and said “boys and girls are different”. They flew home to Jersey but Katie made sure it was a quick trip.
   
3. Josie Balka is working hard at being a big time influencer. She can’t seem to file off the hillbilly edges though and films herself hauling around 3 kids in her husband’s utility truck. She talked about PPD this week and used a lot of words to say nothing. The PPD talk was a great setup for her new CrossFit content. After debuting new paid ads, the Balkas loaded up and headed for a bougie beach vacay and are staying in what appears to be a boutique hotel. You can’t hide (real) money!
   
4. Zach made Whitney hoof it back to Bible Baptist Church on Sunday. This week Whitney sold Colostrum, seed and AG1… if she’s steady drinking all that, no wonder she needs those teeth whitening strips. At least she can drink them in her new Hydrojug. Girl is a selling machine! No new Bates Kitchen from Zach this week. Mayo must not have been on sale.
   
5. Alyssa shared about her fabulous, exciting, amazing trip to Utah. It seems the whole thing was an ad for IvyCity Co, a dress shop that hooked her up with free matchy matchy clothes. They otherwise ate at chain restaurants and freaked out over a Marriott with a desk. Soon enough she was back in Orlando and churning out pictures of the sky, a weenie on a bun and coffee. All of the girls were in a mid week wedding. Alyssa seemed to be forcing herself to smile while talking which just looks painful. They wrapped up the week by forcing Allie to film Alyssa and the other girls in the matching dresses she hauled from Utah.
   
6. Lawson and Tiffany continue to force out old content. Some weird trip to Vegas put me to sleep earlier this week and now I am back at I Love You Day AGAIN. I did learn that it’s been 3 years since JaneJane and Poppa Bill came to the party. I guess when the TV cameras left… they did too. Tiffy put out a reel telling the world that her husband is a stranger. I believe her.
   
7. Have you ever seen a grown ass man draw a whale with a middle schooler and then spend time coloring the whale with crayons? Well I have. I could say that Brandon and Michael have reached a new low… but hell… I watched it. Isn’t there an IBLP workshop or something this man can be doing? Are pen and ink drawings really the way to indoctrination these days??
   
8. Erin is hard at work selling her little pieces of paper with scripture on them. She shared a note this week about her “feelings of inadequacy”. Sisterfriend is struggling. Kelly Joe came for the week and Gil came to preach at the new cult church the Paines are attending. Volusia Baptist is the church and their slogan “back to basics” scares me. Baptists going back is never good.
   
9. No new vlog from Trace and Lydia this week. Pretty quiet on socials beyond an all white photo shoot of Lydia with the mini Trace. It’s still so weird to see a baby with a buzz cut. Quiet usually only means one thing with this crowd…
   
10. Bits and Bytes… Wonder if Kelly will visit Alyssa while in Florida? Alyssa hasn’t had any family stay with her lately. Boy that Ellie is a knock out! If she really does have a burner IG account, daddy Gil could have his hands full. Better Help sponsored The Stew Crew this week and Carlins word salad was a scream! 400 ways to promote a company she would never use! Tiffy commented on Sophia Richie’s IG post… that’s heathen behavior! Little Kenna said “Happy Mother’s Day”.
    

Have a great week friends and remember… if you invite one Baptist, they drink ALL your beer… if you invite TWO Baptists… they won’t drink ANY beer!!

1. Carlin showed off her notes from church this week. Not sure how anything soaks in when she spends the entire service doodling for the Gram… but the notes said we are to “value people over possessions”. Wonder if she’d trade that Tesla for a relationship with Erin? Evan is apparently playing schoolyard games like kickball and duck duck goose on a church league. Otherwise it was the usual constant exploitation from these 2. Their content is Zade heavy since he’s now 2. Layla is getting to be old in kidfluencer years. If you’d like to help them continue to exploit their kids you can now buy Stew Crew merchandise with weird sayings on them that no one has ever heard of.
   
2. Katie and Travis are having a boy. They are “just like” Carlin and Evan… take that as you will. This week was all about the gender reveal and Katie looked at the camera with a straight face and said “boys and girls are different”. They flew home to Jersey but Katie made sure it was a quick trip.
   
3. Josie Balka is working hard at being a big time influencer. She can’t seem to file off the hillbilly edges though and films herself hauling around 3 kids in her husband’s utility truck. She talked about PPD this week and used a lot of words to say nothing. The PPD talk was a great setup for her new CrossFit content. After debuting new paid ads, the Balkas loaded up and headed for a bougie beach vacay and are staying in what appears to be a boutique hotel. You can’t hide (real) money!
   
4. Zach made Whitney hoof it back to Bible Baptist Church on Sunday. This week Whitney sold Colostrum, seed and AG1… if she’s steady drinking all that, no wonder she needs those teeth whitening strips. At least she can drink them in her new Hydrojug. Girl is a selling machine! No new Bates Kitchen from Zach this week. Mayo must not have been on sale.
   
5. Alyssa shared about her fabulous, exciting, amazing trip to Utah. It seems the whole thing was an ad for IvyCity Co, a dress shop that hooked her up with free matchy matchy clothes. They otherwise ate at chain restaurants and freaked out over a Marriott with a desk. Soon enough she was back in Orlando and churning out pictures of the sky, a weenie on a bun and coffee. All of the girls were in a mid week wedding. Alyssa seemed to be forcing herself to smile while talking which just looks painful. They wrapped up the week by forcing Allie to film Alyssa and the other girls in the matching dresses she hauled from Utah.
   
6. Lawson and Tiffany continue to force out old content. Some weird trip to Vegas put me to sleep earlier this week and now I am back at I Love You Day AGAIN. I did learn that it’s been 3 years since JaneJane and Poppa Bill came to the party. I guess when the TV cameras left… they did too. Tiffy put out a reel telling the world that her husband is a stranger. I believe her.
   
7. Have you ever seen a grown ass man draw a whale with a middle schooler and then spend time coloring the whale with crayons? Well I have. I could say that Brandon and Michael have reached a new low… but hell… I watched it. Isn’t there an IBLP workshop or something this man can be doing? Are pen and ink drawings really the way to indoctrination these days??
   
8. Erin is hard at work selling her little pieces of paper with scripture on them. She shared a note this week about her “feelings of inadequacy”. Sisterfriend is struggling. Kelly Joe came for the week and Gil came to preach at the new cult church the Paines are attending. Volusia Baptist is the church and their slogan “back to basics” scares me. Baptists going back is never good.
   
9. No new vlog from Trace and Lydia this week. Pretty quiet on socials beyond an all white photo shoot of Lydia with the mini Trace. It’s still so weird to see a baby with a buzz cut. Quiet usually only means one thing with this crowd…
   
10. Bits and Bytes… Wonder if Kelly will visit Alyssa while in Florida? Alyssa hasn’t had any family stay with her lately. Boy that Ellie is a knock out! If she really does have a burner IG account, daddy Gil could have his hands full. Better Help sponsored The Stew Crew this week and Carlins word salad was a scream! 400 ways to promote a company she would never use! Tiffy commented on Sophia Richie’s IG post… that’s heathen behavior! Little Kenna said “Happy Mother’s Day”.
    

Have a great week friends and remember… if you invite one Baptist, they drink ALL your beer… if you invite TWO Baptists… they won’t drink ANY beer!!

IN THESE STREETS SLOWED AND REVERB

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UYJZJEYiWbY
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Confession of a paid basher:
Today I want to come clean about something I feel very badly about. Icannot undo some of the things I have done, but hopefully this message will prevent other such occurrences in the future.I am a paid basher.
Yes, it is true. Today is my last day at this company; I'm moving onto a new job. I've realized that there are more dignifying jobs out there that can pay me equally as well. But before I go, I want toexplain a few things because this just isn't right and I won't feel good about myself until I expose this sham. It's hurt too many people and I don't want it on my conscience anymore. I can no longer live with a lie.
I work for a company called Global Calumny Funds in Stamford, CT.Basically, it's a Boiler Room much like the one in the movie of thesame name. The idea behind my group is to bash the price of acompany's stock down low enough to where the group of investors whoretained our company's services can buy the stock really cheap andperhaps even take it over all together.There are approximately 70 people at the company divided into severalgroups.
My group, consisting of 5 people, is responsible for IDWD.While I probably shouldn't give any names of anyone working here now,what the heck, I'm leaving here, so what can they do? sue me? Ha! Ican tell you that laptoptrader and janice shell were part of my groupuntil he left last week, as was ninaturtle. Others who have been partof this include early bashers like hard data and Investorman.
You maybe interested to know that some hypsters, such as MONEYMADE and evenDatatech!!, have also been part of the scam (more on that later).There are several companies engaged in the bashing business, ours isnot the only one. However, I can tell you that not every basher inhere is a paid basher. Having done this for a year, I can usually tellwho is a paid basher and who is merely someonehaving a little fun.
While unpaid bashers have a different motive thansomeone like me, they can be unwilling accomplices to helping meachieve my ultimate goal and they also spread rumor and confusionthroughout a room, which also helps me.
What is that goal? Well, I am merely a cog in a much larger machine,so my bosses never really explained the big picture to me, but I'd sayessentially, Shaddowwatch2oo3 was right. There are several companieswho are quite familiar with Jim Bishop and Janice Shell and who aredeathly afraid of them.
There are three types of bashers here at Global Calumny Funds:Advanced, Intermediate and Beginner. An Advanced-level basher (alsoknown as a Silver Tongued Devil) would spread false or misleadinginformation about the company.They would deal in facts, countering every longs post with articles,news reports and opinion surveys that gave a negative impression aboutthe company.
An Intermediate-level basher (also known as a Serpent) would try toweasel their way into the confidence of longs and create doubt using rumor or innuendo.
Finally, a Beginner-level basher (also known as a Pitchfork) would attempt to create confusion in the room by distracting other posters with satire, name calling and pointless arguments.
The idea was to make sure no serious discussion of the stock could take place. A Pitchfork was usually a basher, but not always.Sometimes, we would throw in a hypster Pitchfork such as MONEYMADE and laptop and a pumper like Datatech to create the illusion of an argument going on.
What was really funny (in a perverse way, I guess) was that Datatech and I sat next to each other, laughing the whole time.
I was a Serpent basher, because I am known for effective bashing based on solid facts and truth. I was paid a base wage of $18 an hour for myservices. I was given a $1.25 bonus for every decent quality post over 100 per day as well as a monthly bonus of $100 for every penny the stock had dropped from the previous month. I was also paid a bonus for bashing on weekends. While this may not sound like much, I made a decent, though dishonorable, paycheck plus a nice Laptop with free wireless internet connection.
Each of us sat in a small half-cubicle in a cluster with our teammates. Each group (usually five people) was made of three beginners (two who would bash and one who would hype), one intermediate and one advanced level basher.
Occasionally for some of the hotter stocks, one of the beginners would be replaced by an intermediate depending on how much the stock was rising. IDWD was a low-level stock, meaning it got the 3-1-1 configuration.Honestly though, somehow, I get the feeling that WV Hillbilly may haveworked for a basher company or knows someone who does because the fundwebsites he occasionally posts is eerily similar to our employer's websites. While not exact, I'd say it is about 90 percent the same.
We do have certain rules that we follow. First, we have to develop a character and stay within that character in order to build a "following." My character, "FogOfWar," was a humorous, sarcastic, obnoxious supporter of free speech and loved toportray himself as a truth-telling superhero, but only when it came to bashers. Next, we had to follow certain guidelines on what we could say. Wewere urged to have an "answer" to every long's question, but we were to frame that answer in a way that ridiculed the questioner for asking such a question.
However, we were never to use profanity or vulgarity because that would cause people to ignore us. We were to make fun of people, but in a civil way. The idea was to get "play," i.e. reaction from other posters. The more play we got, the more the room would bedisrupted. Ignored posters get no play.
One exception would be the hypsters since they were "defending" the stock against our onslaught, they got a little more leeway. People would side with the hypster because they thought he was real since he appeared to be on their side, but was really on ours, setting us up to disrupt the room. MoneyMade was quite good at this and gets paid very well.
I've worked on IDWD, VLO, AGII, QBID, BKMP for a few months now. Inaddition to the FogOfWar alias, I've used a few others on severalother boards as well. I've used so many aliases that I can not remember the monikers or the passwords. I honestly lost track of everything. I stuck with FogOfWar because it was the one that got the most play from other posters in closing,
I feel absolutely terrible about this. It's just awful howI've been part of a scam designed to cheat honest, hard-working people out of their investments all for the benefit of a few wealthy people who already have enough money to last a life time.
These greedy people MUST be stopped. That's why I'm posting thisbefore I leave. I want to make up for some of the damage I've done. I can't live with this lie anymore.
You can't imagine how hard it is to look at myself in the mirror each morning knowing my job is to cheatand lie.
I have to go now, I'm too broken up to continue. I hope this confession can make up for my sordid deeds; I would urge everyone who reads this to inform as many people as you can. Only by shining the light of truth can we drive these rats back into the darkness from where they came. Believe me, they don't want publicity.
Good luck and I hope all of you the best in your investment endeavors

Warning: WALL OF TEXT
• Control (2013): Kendrick addresses Drake, along with 10 other rappers, in his verse, prompting passive-aggressive reactions from Drake. Drake downplayed the verse in interviews and seemed genuinely annoyed he had to constantly discuss Kendrick during the rollout for his next album, Nothing Was the Same.
"And that goes for; Jermaine Cole, Big K.R.I.T., Wale, Pusha T, Meek Mills, A$AP Rocky, DRAKE, Big Sean, Jay Electron, Tyler, Mac Miller."
"I got love for you all but I'm trynna murder you niggas, trynna make sure your core fans never heard of you niggas. They don't want to hear not one more noun or verb from you niggas."
• The Language (2013): After months of hating in interviews, Drake finally addresses "Control" on wax, albeit subliminally. He makes it clear he doesn't view Kendrick in the same light as critics do and believes Kendrick is only doing this to get a reaction out of him. Both points would end up common themes whenever Drake addresses Kendrick.
"I don't know why they been lying but your shit is not that inspiring."
"Fuck anybody that's talking that shit just to get a reaction."
"I am the one with the motormouth I am the one you should worry bout."
• BET Awards Cypher (2013): Drake's subliminals on "The Language" prompt Kendrick to make the most direct shots so far, during TDE's cypher at the 2013 BET Awards. Directly referencing Drake's latest album "Nothing Was the Same" only 3 weeks after it released, calling Drake a sensitive rapper, a trend that would continue through this beef.
"And nothing's been the same since they dropped Control and tucked a sensitive rapper back in his pajama clothes."
"I got my thumb on hip-hop, and my foot in the back of your ass."
• Sh!t REMIX (2013): Drake takes the position of Kendrick's big homie, a trend that would also continue in this beef. He makes multiple mentions of helping Kendrick out by giving him a feature and bringing his tour to Los Angeles in 2011 when Kendrick was a much smaller artist.
"Took niggas out the hood like I'm from there, so you know it's all good when I come there."
"I hear you talking about you're city like you run there, then I brought my tour to you're city, you my son there."
• 0 to 100 / The Catch Up (2014): On "The Catch Up," Drake vents to a woman about rappers mentioning him in verses and coming to terms with the fact he's top dog now and the problems that come with that. An obvious reaction to the quick back and forth they had after "Control," he's framing Kendrick, and other rappers, as clout-hungry envious haters that just want his spot.
"Imagine how it feel to watch another nigga at the top, you know that if you wasn't you you would be dissing you dawg?"
• Pay for It (2014): Kendrick goes on the offensive for the first time since the BET Cypher. He directly responds to Drake's "motormouth" lyric from "The Language" and lets Drake know this isn't a warning shot, it's war now.
"Been dissecting your motormouth, til' I break down the engine."
"This ain't no warning shot, this a relevant henchman."
"Ending our friendship, baby I'd rather die alone."
• Used To (2015): Drake references a 2013 interview with Elliot Wilson, where he alleged he saw Kendrick days after the "Control" verse, and his demeanor was quite friendly.
"They gone say you're name on them airwaves, they gone hit you up right after like it's only rap."
• 6PM In New York (2015): On one of Drake's classic timestamp records, he takes shots at a bunch of artists, most notably Tyga. But towards the end of the track, he takes subliminal shots at BOTH Kanye West and Kendrick Lamar. Mentioning "Money Trees" and "Blood On the Leaves" making it clear he's ready to go there with artists of any caliber.
"Why you rapping like you come from the streets? I got a backyard where money seems to come from the trees, and I'm never ever scared to get some blood on my leaves."
• King Kunta (2015): Kendrick subliminally addresses rappers trying to sit on his throne. Most notably though, are the bars about rappers with ghostwriters. When this song first released nobody knew who Kendrick was referring to. But months later, after Meek Mill exposed Drake for using ghostwriters, it became obvious who King Kunta was referencing. It was at this exact point the entire dynamic of the beef began to change.
"I got a bone to pick. I don't want you monkey mouth motherfuckers sitting at my throne again."
"I can dig rapping, but a rapper with a ghostwriter? What the fuck happened?"
"I swore I wouldn't tell, but most of y'all sharing bars like you got the bottom bunk in a 2-man cell."
• Hood Politics (2015): While there are no direct shots at Drake, Kendrick does make reference to reactions to the "Control" verse. He talks about people in our culture being too sensitive and that further dissing could lead to violence because of that. But makes it clear he can press the "red button" and get the West Coast involved if it has to go there. More directed towards East Coast vs. West Coast than Drake, but still relevant to the lore.
"Unless you talking about power, yeah I got a lot of it. I'm the only rapper next to Snoop that can press the button."
"Had the coast on standby, 'K Dot what's up? I heard they opened up Pandora's box, I'll box 'em all in by a landslide."
"I resolved inside that private hall while sitting down with JAY (JAY-Z), he said 'It's funny how one verse can fuck up the game.'"
• 100 (2015): Drake makes another big bro maneuver. Featuring on a Compton legends song (The Game), while filming the music video in Compton. The verse seems to be a reaction to the praise Kendrick received for "To Pimp a Butterfly" he wants Kendrick to know that if he felt like it, he could make an album just as great as TPAB. He also claims Kendrick's recent music gets no play in the club and when it does, the reaction is lackluster.
"I would have all of your fans if I didn't go pop and I stayed on some conscious shit."
"I'm in the club every time they play the competition, if they even play the competition, and I seen the response they get."
• Darkside/Gone (2015): Kendrick one ups Drake. Likely upset a Compton legend allowed Drake to diss him on a song, Kendrick teams up with THE Compton legend on an album named "Compton" to respond to Drake. Directly referencing Drake's song "Enemies" and pokes fun at the constant subliminals Drake continues to send.
"But I still got enemies giving me energy I want to fight now."
"Subliminal sent to me all of this hate, I thought I was holding the mic down."
• Deep Water (2015): The more direct of the Compton soundtrack disses. He again references a Drake song, this time "Started From the Bottom," asserting that unlike Drake, he really started from the bottom. There are also references to the number "6" which Drake has a known affinity for.
"Motherfucker know I started from the bottom."
"They liable to bury him, they nominate six to carry him. They worry him to death but he no vegetarian."
"The beef is on his breathe, inheriting the drama better than a great white, this is life in my aquarium."
• Summer Sixteen (2016): Phase two of the beef begins here. In 2015 President Barack Obama was asked who would win in a beef between Kendrick Lamar & Drake. Barack Obama picked Kendrick, and obviously, Drake doesn't agree. A quick sub to Kendrick on a song mostly focused on the Meek Mill beef.
"Tell Obama that my verses are just like the whips that he in, they bulletproof."
• Untitled 02 (2016): Kendrick pokes fun at Drake, parodying his "If You're Reading This" flow on the last verse. No real direct shots but some possible subs.
"I can put a rapper on life support, guarantee that's something none of you want."
• Untitled 07 (2016): On the penultimate song from Untitled Unmastered, Kendrick addresses a few artists who sent shots at him after TPAB. Though the Jay Electronica shots are most notable, he does take a second to remind Drake that he's not ready for war. Essentially calling Drake a bitch.
"You niggas fear me like y'all fear God."
"Before you poke out your chest, loosen your bra."
"The mastemind, and til' my next album, more power to you."
• Grammys (2016): While there are no obvious shots at Kendrick, this is an important song in the lore. On this song Drake starts the "Top 5" discussion in hip-hop, and saying his spot there is not for debate. This would be referenced on many disses moving forward.
"Most niggas with a deal, couldn't make a greatest hits."
"Y'all a whole lot of things, but you still ain't this."
"Whole city going crazy, top 5 no debating. Top 5, top 5, top 5."
• For Free (2016): One of the more weird instances in this beef. Drake makes a sly reference to Kendrick's 2015 song, For Free? (Interlude). It's not clear if this was an attempt at being friendly again, or a petty pot shot. Although seeing how things played out after, I'd assume this reference was VERY tongue in cheek.
"And like your boy from Compton said "You know this dick ain't free."
•4PM In Calabasas (2016): On another of Drake's classic timestamps records, he shouts out Kendrick once again. This song reads as a post-Views victory lap. But Drake is still clearly taking the position as Kendrick's big homie, the guy that took him on tour when he was a starving artist. Also the first time Drake ever mentioned Kendrick's name on wax.
"When they told me take an R&B nigga on the road (Chris Brown), and I told 'em no and drew for Kendrick and Rocky"
• Gyalchester (2017): Drake makes a direct reference to Grammys. Asserting that's he's no longer just top 5, he's top 2 and he's not #2. Kendrick would obviously take exception. The artist he's been compared to for the last 4 years just claimed the #1 spot on record.
"I know I said top 5 but I'm top 2, and I'm not 2, and I got one, thought you had one, but it's not one, nigga nah."
• The Heart Part 4 (2017): Kendrick becomes the big dog. In the two years since TPAB, Kendrick received a ton of criticism from other artists. Downplaying the impact of the record, downplaying Kendricks skill as an MC. He was being boxed in as the "Black Power" rapper and artists not named Drake (Big Sean, Jay Electronica, Lupe Fiasco) were beginning to feel very comfortable shooting at Kendrick. Then comes The Heart Part 4. This was almost like Kendrick's 5AM in Toronto. He's now established as a top dog in the game, and he let's everybody, including Drake, know. A lot of bars on here could be interpreted as Big Sean disses, but Kendrick counting up to 5 and proclaiming himself as the greatest rapper alive was clearly a response to Gyalchester. Kendrick also name drops JAY-Z, referring to him as Hall of Fame. This could be interpreted as a shot at Big Sean, who has an album of the same name, or Drake, who had just had a public feud with JAY-Z the year before.
"My fans can't wait for me to son you're punk ass and crush you're whole lil shit. I'll big pun your punk ass, you a scared little bitch."
"Tip toeing around my name nigga you lame, and when I get at you homie don't you tell me you was just playing."
"Yelling one, two, three, four five. I am, the greatest rapper alive."
"Hoe JAY-Z hall of fame, sit yo punk ass down."
"Go celebrate with your team and let victory vouch you, just know the next game played I might slap the shit out' you."
"A difference between accomplishments and astonishments."
• ELEMENT. (2017): Much like The Heart Part 4, this song is also seen as a Big Sean diss primarily. But the 2023 leaked version shows Kendrick was prepared to use this song to kick off the Drake beef officially. Obviously, things changed and he went with a more commercial version, but still had shots. The most direct shot to Drake being a reference to Drake being in Compton shooting the "100" music video, and another call back to the Top 5 lyrics from Grammys. This was also the beginning of the "Bogeyman" narrative surrounding Kendrick, as he begs any rapper to say his name on wax.
"I don't do it for the gram, I do it for Compton."
"If I gotta slap a pussy ass nigga, I'ma make it look sexy."
"Mr. one through five, that's the only logic."
"Niggas want to flex on me and be in LA for free huh? Next time they hit the 10 freeway, we need receipts huh?"
"Most of y'all throw rocks and try to hide your hand. Just say his name and I promise that you'll see candy man."
"Last LP, I tried to lift the black artist, but it's a difference between black artists and wack artists."
• GOD.* (2017): Kendrick once again trolls Drake's flow. This time copying the flow from Drake & Kanye's song "Glow" no direct shots or subliminal's really.
• Mask Off Remix (2017): Kendrick's post-DAMN. Victory lap. After years of Drake being able to big bro him in the beef, Kendrick outsells and outperforms Drake in 2017. Kendrick now takes the position of being just as commercial as Drake, while still being true to himself. The gap had finally been closed, authenticity and artistry begin to play an even bigger role in the beef.
"Platinum, platinum, platinum, gotta look at yourself and ask what happened."
"How y'all let a conscious nigga go commercial while only makin' conscious albums?"
"How y'all let the braids on the TV? How y'all let the hood at the table?"
•Family feud (2017): Interestingly enough, at this point it had been 2 years since Drake sent any direct shots at Kendrick. And honestly at this point there wasn't much he could say. Kendrick was still active, moving the culture, and just as relevant as Drake. These bars are seen as a warning to Meek in case he wanted to start the beef again, but I think it's more directed at Kendrick. Drake sees the gap closing, but makes it clear he can still go there with Kendrick if need be. Possibly the biggest reach of this list, but it tracks.
"But this ain't all about calling truce I'm, still dishin' out verbal abuse. That shit could get reintroduced if somebody got something they urging to prove nigga"
•All the stars (2018): Kendrick had a monster 2017 with the release of DAMN. So monster even Drake had to recognize it. I can't find an exact link to the article, but Drake congratulated Kendrick on his success during an interview. Possibly another olive branch like For Free, but Kendrick clearly wasn't feeling it. He tells Drake to keep his fake praise to himself. And even just plain out states he doesn't like Drake.
"Fuck you and all your expectations, I don't even want your congratulations"
"I recognize your false confidence and calculated promises. All in your conversation"
"You endorsin'? Motherfucker, I don't even like you"
"I want the credit if I'm losing or I'm winning"
•Diplomatic immunity (2018): Possibly a little upset at Kendrick dismissing his congratulations, Drake goes back on the offensive for the first time since "100". He reaffirms his position as Kendrick's big homie by referencing songs from To Pimp a Butterfly, U and I. Essentially telling Kendrick he got too much dip on his chip after 2017, and to remember where he came from.
"They try to compare us but, like a job straight out of high school there's no U and I"
"I taught you everything you know now you got student pride"
•Sandra's rose (2018): In 2018 Drake had a lot more to worry about than Kendrick Lamar. He spends the majority of Scorpion going at Kanye West & Pusha T, but made sure Cornrow Kenny caught a stray too with a reference to "Mortal Man" from TPAB. After this we would see Kendrick withdraw from the game for a while due to personal reasons and the 2020 pandemic, essentially surrendering the throne to Drake. At least for the time being.
"I walk in godly form amongst the mortal men"
•Family ties (2021): In the 3 years since Sandra's rose, Drake has continued to run the score up. Going on an insane run of #1 hits, and establishing himself as not only the biggest act in rap, but arguably the biggest in the world. With the change in sound hip-hop was going through, some wondered if Kendrick still had a place in this game as a top rapper. Could he still make hits and be relevant to the culture? Or was he going the André 3000 route? This banger with Baby Keem answered all those questions. Kendrick comes with a refreshed energy, addressing his absence, and making it very clear he still sees himself as the best rapper in the world. He once again references the Drake "Top 5" line from Grammys, and makes allegations that Drake's numbers have been falsified. Baby Keem even gets a shot in towards the end as he alleged Drake or, Number 2, was messaging his girl. Reaffirming to Drake they still see him as #2, and insinuating Drake is a thirst god.
"Smoking on your top 5 tonight" "Don't you address me unless it's with four letters"
"Last year, y'all fucked up all the listener, who went platinum? I call that a visor. Who the fuck backin' 'em? All been falsified"
"#2 DM'ing my bitch, that's cool, I don't ask why"
•No friends in the industry (2021): Drake's responds to Family Ties with his most direct shot since Sandra's rose. Much like Scorpion, Drake was pretty preoccupied with Kanye West for this project, but made sure to let Kendrick know he can't touch him in the numbers game anymore.
"Fuck debating who the GOAT. Better not make this shit about the numbers all I know, better not make this shit about the summers all I know"
•Father time (2022): After Kanye and Drake got back together in 2021 for a Larry Hoover concert, a lot of fans were confused, Kendrick being no different. He likely saw some of himself in Kanye, and wonders how somebody with a mind like Kanye links back up with somebody who's taunted him and his family for years. You can literally hear the disappointment in Kendrick's voice, but he uses it as an opportunity to self-reflect and wonder if he's going about his issues with Drake the wrong way. This was also Kendrick's first time saying Drake's name on wax since "Control".
"When Kanye got back with Drake, I was slightly confused. Guess I'm not mature as I think, got some healing to do"
•Churchill Downs (2022): Drake finds a new angle. With Kendrick returning to the game with Mr. Morale and The Big Steppers, not everybody was so impressed. Drake begins to poke at Kendrick's height, and his lack of presence in the game since 2017. He almost seemed offended that somebody who took 5 years off could still be mentioned in the same breath as him.
"All I hear is tall tales coming from little men"
"Same ones that say they run the game when they not even in it"
•The hillbillies (2023): A hilarious parody of "Sticky" from Honestly, Nevermind. No direct shots or subs, but Kendrick and Keem are clearly poking fun at Drake for making a mediocre dance album.
•AMERICA HAS A PROBLEM (2023): Scary foreshadowing. Kendrick admits that the spirituality he's showcased since Mr. Morale has been a little inauthentic, because there's somebody out there he still REALLY wants to slap the shit out of. He also warns this artist's day one fans to have some facts on them. Just insane, and makes you wonder how long Kendrick has really been scheming.
"Truthfully I be lying in my rap songs, cause I always fail to mention I'll slap homie"
"His career didn't come with no life insurance, hope his day one fans got some facts on them"
•First person shooter (2023): This is an interesting one, because Drake doesn't really send any shots. Besides calling himself the GOAT, and comparing himself to Michael Jackson, not much on here can track back to Kendrick. J. Cole does mention Kendrick as a member of the Big 3, but then says the Spiderman meme is me looking at Drake. Likely asserting Kendrick's lack of activity puts Cole in that #2 spot officially. It feels like a narrative was being pushed that Drake & Cole were the top 2. Kendrick once again takes exception to this, wondering how these guys are BFF's all of a sudden. Wondering how somebody like Cole aligns himself with somebody like Drake. Hearing Drake flex beating a Michael Jackson record, while giving Cole his first #1. Cole and Drake claiming the top 2 spots? This was the moment Kendrick decided to go nuclear.
"Who the GOAT? Tell me who you really rooting for. Like a kid who act bad from January to November, nigga it's just you and Cole."
"Love when they argue the hardest MC. Is it K-Dot, is if Aubrey or me? We the Big Three like we started a league, but right now I feel like Muhammad Ali."
"Rhyming with me is the biggest mistake, the Spiderman meme is me looking at Drake."
"Everybody steppers, well fuck it, then everybody breakfast and I'm bout to clean up my plate."
"Niggas steady talking 'bout when this gonna be repeated, what the fuck bro? I'm one away from Michael, nigga beat it."
"Stories About My Brother (2023): Once again some insane foreshadowing. This song is Drake once again reaffirming his status as top dog, and shouting out the shooters he keeps around him. He also talks about artists banding together to put a dent in his armor. He then addresses Kendrick, telling him Mr. Morale was 'buns'. He also wants Kendrick to know nobody would care if he retired, saying he's not 'Kobe Bryant' to us, possibly a reference to Kendrick & Kobe's 2017 interview. Though some argue these are Kanye West shots, the Kobe reference swings it towards Kendrick in my opinion. The final chapter of subliminals. Clearly Kendrick had enough.
"Your last album was buns, you niggas Hawaiian as fuck."
"I can't wait for the day you choose to retire your stuff, takin' off the sneakers cause you tired of lacing 'em up."
"That's how you gonna find out you not Kobe Bryant to us."

Big Sean fr Kendrick- Control (not sure how Big Sean still hasn’t officially added this to his album)
Drake- The Language
TDE-2013 BET Cypher
Future ft Drake- Shit (remix)
Drake- 0 to 100/The Catch Up
Jay Rock ft Kendrick- Pay For It
Drake- Used To
Drake- 6PM In New York
Kendrick- King Kunta
Kendrick- Hood Politics
Kendrick- You Ain’t Gotta Lie
Game ft Drake- 100
Dr. Dre ft Kendrick- Darkside/Gone
Dr. Dre ft Kendrick- Deep Water
Drake- Grammys (ft Future)
Drake- Summer Sixteen
Dj Khaled fr Drake- For Free (not really a diss tho, seems like a shout out)
Kendrick- Untitled 07 2014-2016
Drake ft Lil Uzi (Leak)- At The Gates
Future ft Kendrick- Mask Off (remix)
Mike WiLL Made It ft Kendrick- Perfect Pint
Lil Wayne fr Drake- Family Feud
Kendrick- The Heart Part 4
Kendrick- Element
Drake- Non-Stop
Drake- Gyalchester
Drake- Sandra’s Rose
Kendrick- All The Stars
Kendrick- Kings Dead (ft Future)
Drake- Diplomatic Immunity
Baby Keem ft Kendrick- Family Ties
Kendrick- N95
Kendrick- Father Time
Jack Harlow ft Drake- Churchhill Downs
Drake- Sticky
Kendrick and Baby Keem- The Hillbillies (seems to parody Sticky, which has a shot at Kendrick while being about women)
Beyoncé ft Kendrick- America Has A Problem
Drake- Redbutton
Drake- Stories About My Brother
AND FINALLY!
Drake- First Person Shooter (exclusion sub)
Future ft Kendrick- Like That
Drake- Push Ups
Drake- Taylor Made Freestyle
Kendrick- Euphoria
Kendrick- 6:16 In LA
Drake- Buried Alive pt 2
Drake- Family Matters
Kendrick- Meet The Grahams
Kendrick- Not Like Us
Drake- The Heart Part 6
Fun fact: Drake has 19 pre 2024 songs excluding For Free (it’s more of a shout out) and Kendrick has 19 pre 2024 songs excluding Control and The Hillbillies (control wasn’t a direct shot and the hillbillies is only a parody)

Let's say I have an image like this
And I want to put another image within the glass (microscope slide) as if you were looking at it through a window. No extra magical background or anything like that. Just simple clear cut straight to business.
Which AI would I use for this?

Let's say I have an image like this
And I want to put another image within the glass (microscope slide) as if you were looking at it through a window. No extra magical background or anything like that. Just simple clear cut straight to business.
Which AI would I use for this?

For those who don't know, Old Man Logan was a Dark Knight Returns-styled "retired superhero has one final adventure in a dark future" alternative universe story starring Wolverine, written by Mark Millar and released as an eight-issues long storyline in 2008. The story takes place in a version of the Marvel Universe, where the supervillains finally realized that they outnumber all the superheroes and could wipe them out in a pre-planned organized attack, which they did and then divided the World (or at least the United States) to territories ruled by different villains.
Only few heroes survived, including Wolverine, who is now an old man (hence the title) and lives pacifistic life with his family. However, due to lack of money to pay the rent to his landlord (who I get to later), Logan is forced to accept a cross-country delivery job from blinded Hawkeye.
It's basically Unforgiven meets Mad Max.
Now, if you know your comics, you probably know Mark Millar at least by reputation. Just like Garth Ennis, he is one of those "edgelords, who seems to hate comics, especially superhero comics, but for some reason keeps writing them" type of writers. He is especially fond of unlikeable main characters and inclusion of pointless shock value, like sexual assault, in his comics, basically just as a lazy way to get them free publicity, which in turn leads into movie and Netflix deals.
However, Millar does usually tone down some of his "Millarisms", when writing for characters he doesn't own and his sensibilities do fit the particular premise of OML. The story takes place in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, where all hope is lost and everyone is out for themselves and yet, despite all of this, none of the main heroic characters are turned into a-holes or lose their humanity. Logan has all of his more noble characteristics intact, his relationship with his family is genuily loving and Hawkeye has managed to keep his snarky sense of humor. Compare this to something like the orignal comic book Civil War, which Millar also wrote, where basically everyone was turned into an aggressive idiot, who secretly always hated their friends, just for the sake of contriving the conflict.
The firts seven issues are arguably the best writing Millar has ever done (at least for Marvel) and up there as one of the best Wolverine stories. And then we get to the final issue...
Remember the landlord Logan owned money to? Well, that's the Hulk, who has gone mad and formed a "Hulk gang" out of his offsprings. Now, this alone doesn't really bother me. This isn't the first story, where living in a post-apocalyptic World and absorbing ton of radiation drove Hulk evil (Maestro from Peter David's excellent Future Imperfect story being probably the most well-known example), and while he doesn't want to hurt anybody and usually protects the innocent civilians even during his rampages, Hulk has kinda been more about keeping himself happy and not really caring about being a hero, since the day one in the regular Marvel Universe.
What does bother me is how he formed his Hulk gang. During the final fight between Logan and Banner, the latter mentions that they are allinbred incest babies birthed by She-Hulk, his cousin. It's never spelled out whenever it was consensual, with her going crazy like him, or involved SA (although, since this is Millar we are talking about, we never see her and Banner does say "she was the only woman, who could take the pace", I'm worried that it is supposed to be the latter), but it is still icky and pointless. Other than "hurrdurr, inbred hillbilly stereotypes, but as Hulks" "joke", it adds nothing to the story and is the one moment where Millar lets his "Millarisms" come before the story. And it's not like Millar couldn't have both a gang of Hulk offsprings andno incest, since there are plenty super-powered female villains, who could have been their mother.
Ultimately, this whole things just leaves very bad taste in your mouth, once the story is over.
And I know that I'm not the only one who feels this way. I'm constantly seeing people calling Old Man Logan overrated, if not outright terrible, and when you ask them why they feel that way, the answer usually is something along the lines of "It's a story, where Hulk has incest children with She-Hulk". And while I fully understand why they feel that way, it also feels little unfair, since we are talking about 8 issues, where the Hulk gang are involed only the first and final issues. Even if just looking at them makes you sick, once you know their origin, that's still 6 issues of solid stuff that still holds up.
If only Millar could have helped himself or someone at Marvel would have said him "no" on this point, Old Man Logan could have been seen as his masterpiece. But now, I always feel the need to add "but the final issue sucks", when admitting to liking it.

Alright crew! I was very excited to attend my cousin's wedding this upcoming summer. My aunt and uncle have been hyping it up for over a year now. We received the Save the Date, the invite, were excited to RSVP yes, until... my sister calls and shares that it's a no kid wedding. Wow did I feel deflated. I don't think people who choose this route understand the disappointment this can cause for their family with kids. Don't worry, I will also be sharing my thoughts with my therapist, because it is more about me than my cousin's decision, but I felt blindsided and very sad. My son is 2 years old and our family live all over the country and we were so excited to introduce our little dude to his auntie's and uncles that he's never met. I realize I am co-opting my cousin's wedding as a family reunion, but we haven't gotten together fully in over 15 years. So that's my biggest disappointment. Let alone the logistical nightmare of finding childcare for an event where all of our usual childcare options will be... at the wedding ;P And for those who don't like kids, this will be an unrelatable idea: not only do I love my son, I like him a whole bunch. I was super excited to dance and eat cake and celebrate with him. We have always had kids at every wedding I've attended, including my own, and I've always enjoyed their lightheartedness and ease to start the celebration. But again, I like kids and enjoy spending time with them, so if that's not your jam... this rant's probably not for you -- haha!
I would like to describe the guest experience, so that you can learn from my cousin's mistakes.
We received the Save the Date (no info about no kids) So I saved that fucking date. And no I did not care enough to look at the wedding website because... I saved the fucking date.
We received the physical invitation. NO DETAILS ABOUT NO CHILDREN ON THE INVITE. There was a QR Code, which I scanned. The QR code sent me to an RSVP page. I clicked every image, every link, and none of these sent me to the actual wedding website. Also, the RSVP Page had no information about NO KIDS.
I physically typed in the wedding website because the QR code was useless. I read (no joke) three pages worth the information until I got to the Q&A section, and finally got to the no kids info, after another question was answered!!!!!!!! So the couple did not make this information easy to find, nor did one single freaking family member mention this at any point in the last fucking year. I'm sorry, I'm getting upset reliving this obnoxious experience.
There are a few things that I think would have set my expectations and not left me feeling so rejected, and honestly, surprised.

1. Once you know you are having a child-free wedding, let everyone know!! This felt like the rug got pulled out from under me. So so so surprised. I really think being transparent and honest upfront would have helped with my negative reaction. Also, I would like to say, if you are hosting the first "no children" wedding in your family's history, and this is new, and your family is old school, say this shit up front!!!!!
2. PUT THAT SHIT ON EVERYTHING If you don't have a good network or connections with your family where you can text, call, etc. Or your parents don't want to be the bearers of bad news and you gotta take the responsibility, saddle up and say no kids as early as possible. Like I mentioned, I saved that fucking date without looking at the wedding website, because this is the first wedding I've been invited to that has had a "no kids" policy. This may be new for people, so let them know ASAP and in lots of places.
3. PUT THAT SHIT ON EVERYTHING II Put it on the invite. I do not know why this was left off of the invitation, especially when the QR code on the invite sent us to a page that did not link back to the website with the hidden detail. (SUBRANT: I also read on some websites to "be direct" and only list on the invite those who are invited, meaning don't even address the kids, and I did not clue into this at all. So that advice was not effective for me. Now I may be an idiot for not clueing into that because I'm a hillbilly from the middle of nowhere, but this was not a cultural norm I even paid attention to.)
4. PUT THAT SHIT ON EVERYTHING III Don't hide your "no kids" info at the bottom of your website. If people get that far, I'd be surprised. There are so many fun links and images to get distracted by, you might want to make that info clearer earlier on.

Ultimately, I respect my cousin's decision. Weddings are expensive and kids (even my sweet angle baby) aren't for everyone. I would totally be down to party without a lil bean for a night, but finding trusted childcare is no joke. Help your family get over feeling rejected by being honest and transparent up front. Those who don't like kids may not truly understand that parents feel their kids are an extension of themselves and their love. Additionally, many people find weddings to be family affairs that include all members of the family. So be compassionate and kind when people are thrown off guard by this newer cultural change. And by all means, enjoy your big day!!

Alright crew! I was very excited to attend my cousin's wedding this upcoming summer. My aunt and uncle have been hyping it up for over a year now. We received the Save the Date, the invite, were excited to RSVP yes, until... my sister calls and shares that it's a no kid wedding. Wow did I feel deflated. I don't think people who choose this route understand the disappointment this can cause for their family with kids. Don't worry, I will also be sharing my thoughts with my therapist, because it is more about me than my cousin's decision, but I felt blindsided and very sad. My son is 2 years old and our family live all over the country and we were so excited to introduce our little dude to his auntie's and uncles that he's never met. I realize I am co-opting my cousin's wedding as a family reunion, but we haven't gotten together fully in over 15 years. So that's my biggest disappointment. Let alone the logistical nightmare of finding childcare for an event where all of our usual childcare options will be... at the wedding ;P And for those who don't like kids, this will be an unrelatable idea: not only do I love my son, I like him a whole bunch. I was super excited to dance and eat cake and celebrate with him. We have always had kids at every wedding I've attended, including my own, and I've always enjoyed their lightheartedness and ease to start the celebration. But again, I like kids and enjoy spending time with them, so if that's not your jam... this rant's probably not for you -- haha!
I would like to describe the guest experience, so that you can learn from my cousin's mistakes.
We received the Save the Date (no info about no kids) So I saved that fucking date. And no I did not care enough to look at the wedding website because... I saved the fucking date.
We received the physical invitation. NO DETAILS ABOUT NO CHILDREN ON THE INVITE. There was a QR Code, which I scanned. The QR code sent me to an RSVP page. I clicked every image, every link, and none of these sent me to the actual wedding website. Also, the RSVP Page had no information about NO KIDS.
I physically typed in the wedding website because the QR code was useless. I read (no joke) three pages worth the information until I got to the Q&A section, and finally got to the no kids info, after another question was answered!!!!!!!! So the couple did not make this information easy to find, nor did one single freaking family member mention this at any point in the last fucking year. I'm sorry, I'm getting upset reliving this obnoxious experience.
There are a few things that I think would have set my expectations and not left me feeling so rejected, and honestly, surprised.
1) Once you know you are having a child-free wedding, let everyone know!! This felt like the rug got pulled out from under me. So so so surprised. I really think being transparent and honest upfront would have helped with my negative reaction. Also, I would like to say, if you are hosting the first "no children" wedding in your family's history, and this is new, and your family is old school, say this shit up front!!!!!
2) PUT THAT SHIT ON EVERYTHING If you don't have a good network or connections with your family where you can text, call, etc. Or your parents don't want to be the bearers of bad news and you gotta take the responsibility, saddle up and say no kids as early as possible. Like I mentioned, I saved that fucking date without looking at the wedding website, because this is the first wedding I've been invited to that has had a "no kids" policy. This may be new for people, so let them know ASAP and in lots of places.
3) PUT THAT SHIT ON EVERYTHING II Put it on the invite. I do not know why this was left off of the invitation, especially when the QR code on the invite sent us to a page that did not link back to the website with the hidden detail. (SUBRANT: I also read on some websites to "be direct" and only list on the invite those who are invited, meaning don't even address the kids, and I did not clue into this at all. So that advice was not effective for me. Now I may be an idiot for not clueing into that because I'm a hillbilly from the middle of nowhere, but this was not a cultural norm I even paid attention to.)
4) PUT THAT SHIT ON EVERYTHING III Don't hide your "no kids" info at the bottom of your website. If people get that far, I'd be surprised. There are so many fun links and images to get distracted by, you might want to make that info clearer earlier on.
Ultimately, I respect my cousin's decision. Weddings are expensive and kids (even my sweet angle baby) aren't for everyone. I would totally be down to party without a lil bean for a night, but finding trusted childcare is no joke. Help your family get over feeling rejected by being honest and transparent up front. Those who don't like kids may not truly understand that parents feel their kids are an extension of themselves and their love. Additionally, many people find weddings to be family affairs that include all members of the family. So be compassionate and kind when people are thrown off guard by this newer cultural change. And by all means, enjoy your big day!!