By all means am i okay to wait until marriage. I wanted to when i was younger but got pressured into sex and then was r*ped when i was 15 which afterwards i became super hypersexual. When i turned 18 i stopped until i met my ex bf when i was 20 and i ended up getting pregnant. I left him almost immediately due to him lying and manipulating me our whole relationship and then admitting he wanted to get me pregnant, he is currently in jail and i havent spoken to him since i was 6 weeks pregnant, my son is almost 7 months old. My current BF and i started dating a month and a half ago, ive known him for 10 years we basically grew up together and ive been insanely close with him and his family for ages, we have done sexual things but i recently found out he has struggled w a porn addiction for years and in the first week or so of our relationship he was flirting with other girls on social media, he hasnt since then that i know of (he told me he doesnt remember flirting which i feel is a lie) and weve talked about a lot of things since then to the point of both of us sobbing and him apologizing over and over and asking why im still with him. God put him in my life for a reason and i wholeheartedly believe its to be my husband, and im not giving up on him that easy my BF is worth so much more than he realizes, hes worth fighting for and worth someone standing by his side while he heals. He is such a good man and always has been. He’s deleted social media and is adamant that im the one he wants whole heartedly, he treats me like a princess which i feel i don’t deserve. Im a broken and insecure person due to the insane amount of trauma ive had, he is so understanding about all of it i don’t understand how, im working on myself like crazy to be better, im in therapy, parenting classes, etc. He recently brought up he wants to wait till marriage to do anything sexual again (which im totally down for, id always wanted to wait but feel like i cant or a man wont want me) but due to what has happened with him flirting with girls in the beginning of our relationship and his porn addiction im terrified hell search for sexual pleasure somewhere else even though he says he wont. i asked him if he ever has those desires to just come to me and we can sit down and talk, read the bible and whatever else he thinks will help. Im worried he wont. He is adamant about me being the one he wants to marry (yes i know weve been dating for a short time but weve been extremely close for 10 years) He is working so hard to heal himself and work on himself, i partially blame his father for getting him into porn and doing unspeakable things to him as a child but obviously my BF is his own person and makes his own choices so its also on him. I honestly dont know where this is going i just keep typing im so sorry this is so long. Basically im scared that my BF will search for sexual pleasure in porn and other girls even though he says he loves me and wants me and wants to wait till marriage and never wants me to feel like hes just with me for my body. I feel so loved and understood by him i know its my own insecurities and i should stop worrying. Im completely myself around him, ive never been able to be as weird and goofy in any past relationships as i am with him, im always hiding parts of myself but with him im completely and wholeheartedly myself. I am so happy with him and as a person who has had depression from a very young age it felt like i would never be this happy. His sister has even told me shes never seen him this happy and in love before and shes happy for us and doesn’t believe he would ever cheat or intentionally harm me (i trust her with my whole heart and soul, shes basically been my best friend since i was 12 and knows her brother better than anyone and wouldnt lie to me) I guess im just here for advice? and maybe validation? i dont know i just needed to get this out to people who may understand and can help me.
TL:DR - BF and i have done sexual things, he wants to stop and wait till marriage due to wanting me for more than just my body, his porn addiction and his beliefs. I am wholeheartedly open to it but am very broken and scared he will search for sexual pleasure in porn and other women though he is adamant he wont and would like to sit and talk and read the bible with me anytime he has impure thoughts
Ive never posted on reddit before sorry if ive done any of this wrong and its confusing. id just really like some advice/encouragement

So I (M 36) have been seeing this girl (29) for a couple of times now, I think it going pretty good between us: 1st date dinner then coffee, we talked alot, she said she really like it, 2nd date dinner and movie, then 3rd we went to my house to cooked, a day later back again at my house and this time we getting more touching, cuddle, she on her period so we not have sex yet. That was like 2 week ago, because after that I have to travel for business then she have to. We been keeping messaging daily, it been really good! So we begin to mention about getting serious, about becoming boyfriend & girlfriend, but she says (half joking, half serious) that I will need to give het a gift in diamond if I want her to be my girl friend, she really like diamond, even have a tattoo in diamond shape on the back. So my question is this girl serious about wanting a relationship between us or she is just into material/gold digger? Or she already into me but need me to prove it by give her a worthy gift? So girls, what are your opinions on this? We are planning a getaway 2 days next week, I already book a room for us

dating #advice

tldr; while my partner was visiting her sister last weekend, my sister in-law and her husband told her to break up with me. Now I don't trust them. We have a meeting today to discuss how to move forward. Help!
Background:
My (32M) partner (30F) and I met in 2011 at university. We kissed for the first time, and started a relationship in 2012. It was beautiful, so so beautiful. We were two inseparable love birds. The amazing memories from those years will last me a lifetime. In 2015 we started facing challenges in our communication. We failed to resolve them and ultimately broke up/reconciled twice between 2015 and 2018.
During the breakup we tried to live our lives, forget each other, meet other people. She even moved to another country and had a great time there. We had minimal communication while broken up: sharing only major milestones like graduation, or the random message when she got a tattoo etc. Eventually she moved back to the same country. We started talking again and agreed that we would fight to make our relationship work. We worked out our issues. Since 2018, we've been learning and growing together. We've had arguments, especially when adjusting to living together. Things are still not PERFECT but I was convinced they are good, until last weekend.....
The issue:
My GF visited her sister (35F), the husband and their 2 daughters. When she came back, she wasn't in a good mood. She started picking a fight with me about dishes, laundry and other small things. I was shocked. We didn't see each other for a weekend, and this is the hello I got. I had actually done 3 loads of laundry that weekend. I cleaned her lunch boxes and pots from the previous week that had started developing mould. The fight was very unreasonable. Ultimately she told me that she was doubting/confused about our relationship. I'm thinking: WTF!!
It's not the first time we fight after she talks to her sister. So I dug and she eventually told me that in laws wanted her to reflect on breaking up with me. It went far. They offered her a place to stay if she would need a few months to process the breakup. I became more confused the more details I learned. At family events they are always friendly. When I got the impression that they don't like me, my partner assured me that they all thought I'm a great guy. Well, it's now clear that although I'm a great guy, just not the right guy for their "little sister." I've known this woman much longer than the sister has known her husband. The arguments they made are along the lines of: I'm holding her back from her dreams, I have no direction in life, cultural differences. A suggestion was made (not sure if by my GF or them) that I may be manipulating her. As a result, I find it hard to discuss with her now because, will she just say I'm manipulating her when I share my views? According to my gf, they reiterated that I'm a nice person, just not the person for her. Part of it could be financial. I'm not close to f.e. having enough savings to purchase a house (which I know is her dream, it's mine too, I'm just not there yet).
Anyway, we're meeting later today, all four of us. I don't trust them anymore. I don't feel comfortable with my partner visiting them. I don't want to visit them either. I don't think I even want to talk to them at family events anymore. I feel angry, disgusted, humiliated, and stabbed in the back. I have so many questions. Who else did they talk to? Other siblings, the parents? How long have they been thinking this? Is my girlfriend telling me the full truth or is she protecting her family by withholding certain information? (she's done this in the past) It's a mess.
Some other context:

• My partner has been feeling low energy for a while and recently shared with her sister that she sometimes has suicidal thoughts.
• My partner and all her family are white, EU. I am black, non-EU.
• Their native language is my FIFTH language. I speak relatively well, although I am uncomfortable in a family context with fast-paced group conversations. I am usually quiet during family gatherings unless I have a 1-1 conversation.
• I am currently not working, I'm receiving unemployment benefits which isn't much money but enough to cover my basic expenses. GF is doing quite well financially.
• I'm not actively looking for a job but rather completing a 7 month, full-time data science bootcamp, accredited by government, working on real use cases with real companies, career coaching etc so I'm confident in securing a job in the coming months when the training is complete.
• GFs sister recently had kids and has shared her desire for GF to start having kids too so their kids can grow up together (I want to wait with kids until I secure a job after my training and have a better financial circumstances)
• When we got back together after 2018, we decided to move in together and I applied for a family reunion through my gf (better possibilities for me in terms of access to the job market). I live in EU for 18 years but have no nationality.

The situation now:

• My partner says that she's 99% sure about us (i can live with the 1% doubt lol)
• Partner is willing to go low contact with sister but I feel bad because she loves her nieces and actually 3 weeks ago, her and her sister had a heart to heart where they both cried and reaffirmed their sibling love for each other
• we are having a call to discuss how to move forward with our relationship, all four of us.

Honestly, I don't know how to approach the conversation. How would you do it? What would you ask? What would you want to have as outcome? Is this talk even healthy/necessary?
The truth is, if I could, I would never talk to them again, I miss nothing in my life by avoiding them. But how do I ensure that i don't push my GF from her family and create more resentment either towards me or the sister?
If you read this far, I appreciate it, and happy to hear your thoughts!

Let me preface with saying that Elden Ring is by far my most successful try at Souls games so give me some slack here but I think I've found a reason why I can manage it better in addition to it being the easiest game of them all so far.
I have a theory that what games you've learned to play could form your later development at these games, since brains have a way of forging these habits and skills which can be accessed by association (for example the very understanding that a bicycle stays up when you keep it moving, you don't have to go over that again with motorcycle, but rather expand on that knowledge.
Every FromSoftware game also has a distinct style in the bosses and with Elden Ring it's the delayed attacks that punish you for panic rolling and not having a sense of rhytm even if it's a bit swung rhythm. I feel like for me it really comes from enjoying games like the Sly Cooper games in my childhood which had the platforming be about both swinging and tighter rhythm, not always about waiting for platforms to move or the preciseness of moving since the platforming sparkles in that game are rather forgiving.
I always found myself timing my button presses very much on that whole swing and even humming and moving my whole body with the platforming and always feeling that "phew" moment when it was done. That same feeling comes from the Elden Ring boss attacks. They have a consistent but sludgy and swinging rhythm to them, that rewards patience instead of funky and tight that rewards fast reactions.

Talk to a kid. Why do I say that? I teach elementary school music in a very Haitian dominated school. And the girls are obsessed with my skin texture and hair texture.
Always hated my hair because Hashimoto’s messed up puberty’s transformation of it leaving it dry, frizzy and uneven curl wise. Now I don’t mind it so much and that’s just because the girls I teach are obsessed with it. My skin too…..they love pointing out how you can see my veins or how red my hands get after playing rhythm sticks with them compared to theirs. Oh and don’t get me started on how obsessed some of them are with my visible, four of them, tattoos.
I started acknowledging my confusion when they change hair styles, especially when they go from braids to natural hair or change up their braid styles. It takes me a minute or two to recognize them but I am getting use to it after 3 years of teaching here. But I never realized how much of a self esteem boost they in return give me. Especially when they throw out how they would love to see me wear braids like them. The boys on the other hand are all about the tattoos or my eye color, blue.
The other day one of the younger siblings I have never met stopped dead in his little tracks, stared at me, tugged his mom’s pant leg for her attention then pointed to me and said very loudly: Mommy that her! That the pretty lady who (enter sister’s name) wants you to do braids on. I think she look good in them! Then proceeded to run my way to hug me while his sister cringed at his over excitement.
Self esteem boost if I ever needed one right now. Now that is not to say all kids will boost you up self esteem wise as they do have a habit of gaslighting us or humbling us but the ones that do actually make my day when I am overwhelmed or not feeling good.

We knew each other since primary school. We grew up together, playing video and board games. We lived on the same street, and would often hang out together after school. He was my best friend's brother.
We grew closer to each other when we became young adults. So close that it was confusing. Confusing because where I come from, same gender relationships are frowned upon. I eventually had to give in to marrying a young woman, but deep in my soul, I had unexplainable feelings for him.
My marriage started breaking down terribly after a few months, to the point where I found myself alone most of the time. Then, out of nowhere, he got in touch again. We met up and our love grew. We explored our feelings for one another. We confessed, we embraced, we celebrated, it was beautiful. For the first time in my life, I felt loved, cared for, and understood. I was with someone who knew every inch of me. I was with someone who protected me from the rest of the world, in a small, Pacific country where everyone else frowned upon couples of the same gender.
Then one evening, we met. I drove over 200 KMs to meet him and his brother - my best friend. We sat down, had some drinks, played board games - just like we did when we were kids. It was beautiful. We had so much fun. He laughed with us. He served us drinks. I wished him well before going back home. He had to travel to another town for work the following day.
I texted him like I was crazy the next day. He replied to a few of them, then his replies never came. I grew worried, but tried convincing myself that he might just be busy with work.
Around midnight, my phone rang. It was my best friend (his brother). I picked up. My heart stopped.
The love of my life hung himself in the day. I didn't know what to do. I was broken. Shattered, like the dreams he and I saw of living our lives together, far away from that country.
Still, I had to hide everything and be a best friend. His brother (and family) needed me, so I drove to his house. The memories of having met there the night before was haunting. Time had stood still.
It's been 4 years. I have relocated to another country and tried starting a new life, but that part of my life is still frozen in time. Not a single day goes by when I think about him. I wish he had called me - just once before he made that decision. I wish I could hold him once and tell him how everything would be alright. I wish I could hear him say my name one more time. I miss him. He has taken a part of me with him, and with me, he has left memories that will last a lifetime.

I was already reeling from losing one friend who accused me of sex-trafficking my wife.
Then I got an email from a different online friend who has known me for longer, over a year and a half, though not in person.

...this increased sense of contumely, as a broader character trait, is evident in how you deal with challenges. You can't bear being told what to do, especially by women (in your own words, 'should' is a taboo). You want people to hear your predicaments, but you don't trust anyone to let them help you with any insight that has not come from yourself. Your problems greatly pain you, but you surely revel at narrating them at length, provided the listener nods in agreement...If your concern is self-esteem, you have too many character traits that go against low self-esteem. You are way too optimistic, materialistic, ambitious, competitive. You may feel miserable in many regards, but so does everyone. Your mind may seek a better world, but your instincts, your attitudes, your heart, your soul is the prototype of capitalism. You are easily hurt, true, but the voice that speaks from your wounds is that of hurt narcissism. Had you been born as a white man, with exactly the same traits you have, you would not care at all about the plight of ethnic minorities in any country.

I've shared my experiences with racism with her before, she even commissioned a long piece from me about it for her e-zine. But now she says my anti-racism is really just narcissism, that I am prejudiced against white people, and care nothing about white children.
Not going to respond to this email, and blocked her so she can't email me again. But I'm obsessing about it and can't stop wondering if these two people who now hate me are correct.
I feel like my entire life has revolved around this cycle:

1. Feel intensely inferior and ashamed of myself, report depression and anxiety
2. Get advised to work on my self-esteem and feel better about myself, look out for my own good qualities, take time off to rest and relax.
3. Actually talk about my good qualities, take time off to rest and relax and not self-improve.
4. Get called a narcissist or accused of not listening, being lazy, not doing the work.
5. Go back to step 1.

I have posted before on how I don't know when I am right or wrong. Am I a narcissistic sex trafficker? If I say no, isn't that exactly what a narcissistic sex trafficker would say?
My wife would think the idea I sex-trafficked her ridiculous. But isn't that exactly what a gaslit abused woman would say? And she would launch into a long lecture of her own.
This is why I'm so scared and confused. Everyone says you have to be self-confident and love yourself for people to like you. But the moment I actually do become self-confident or defend my life in any way, people hate me. Even writing this post...my ex-friend would say it's just part of the problem, endless pleas for attention and sympathy.
Is the problem just me? Am I just...evil?
Do I even deserve to live? Am I only a shameless attention seeker?

I'm an Egypt-based self-described "citizen of the world" who's a bit of an old soul. I have a pretty interesting life, enjoyable career, good work-life balance, interesting hobbies and great relationships with family and friends. I used to live in the UK and I had no problem meeting new people on a regular basis over there. However, after returning to Egypt, I've found it challenging to meet folks organically. I gave dating apps a go but there was no real connection and I didn't like to force anything that didn't feel right.
I have professional ties to the US and I've got family and friends in Germany and the UK, so I travel occasionally for work and pleasure. I enjoy outdoors activities like hiking, mountain/hill walking, camping, sailing and swimming. That said, I'm pretty much a "hobbit" at heart and appreciate lounging at home with a good book and a good pipe. I'm an excellent home cook, if I say so myself; an avid reader, decent guitar and Irish whistle player, hobbyist language learner, and bodyweight workout enthusiast.
I'm into music and cinema. I love metal, rock, jazz (Japanese jazz in particular), blues and Irish/Scottish traditional music. I have my own place in Egypt and I live alone. I've lived alone for different reasons over the past 14 years on and off. Ideally, I'd like to have a second home base overseas somewhere down the line. Relocating is definitely something I'm willing to do, so it's not a deal breaker if you're based overseas. My work can be done remotely, so moving away from home temporarily or even permanently is an option.
I'd like to meet a well-adjusted woman who's comfortable in her skin and enjoys her own company. We both must be interested in each other's lives and stories. Physical attraction is also very important, so it'd be great if we could exchange photos early on. Being able to speak two or more languages is always sexy. Bonus points if you have postgraduate education and/or good career trajectory.
If you're interested, let's have a chat!

What is the reason for entering the dark night of the soul? Is it to get rid of egoic habits (addictions etc.)? all spiritual teachers say that healing is lifelong, it doesn't end, so if the dark night of the soul is not for healing, what is it for?
Note: the dark night of the soul I am talking about is the stage of the ego's death before enlightenment.

What is the reason for entering the dark night of the soul? Is it to get rid of egoic habits (addictions etc.)? all spiritual teachers say that healing is lifelong, it doesn't end, so if the dark night of the soul is not for healing, what is it for?
Note: the dark night of the soul I am talking about is the stage of the ego's death before enlightenment.

What is the reason for entering the dark night of the soul? Is it to get rid of egoic habits (addictions etc.)? all spiritual teachers say that healing is lifelong, it doesn't end, so if the dark night of the soul is not for healing, what is it for?
Note: the dark night of the soul I am talking about is the stage of the ego's death before enlightenment.

What is the reason for entering the dark night of the soul? Is it to get rid of egoic habits (addictions etc.)? all spiritual teachers say that healing is lifelong, it doesn't end, so if the dark night of the soul is not for healing, what is it for?
Note: the dark night of the soul I am talking about is the stage of the ego's death before enlightenment.

What is the reason for entering the dark night of the soul? Is it to get rid of egoic habits (addictions etc.)? all spiritual teachers say that healing is lifelong, it doesn't end, so if the dark night of the soul is not for healing, what is it for?
Note: the dark night of the soul I am talking about is the stage of the ego's death before enlightenment.

General Spring Quotes -

Certainly! Here are 20 general spring quotes to brighten your day:

• "Spring adds new life and new joy to all that is."
• "The earth laughs in flowers."
• "No winter lasts forever; no spring skips its turn."
• "Spring is nature's way of saying, 'Let's party!'"
• "Blossom by blossom, the spring begins."
• "Spring: a lovely reminder of how beautiful change can truly be."
• "Where flowers bloom, so does hope."
• "The world is mud-luscious and puddle-wonderful."
• "April hath put a spirit of youth in everything."
• "In the spring, at the end of the day, you should smell like dirt."
• "Spring unlocks the flowers to paint the laughing soil."
• "Every flower must grow through dirt."
• "The day the Lord created hope was probably the same day he created spring."
• "Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush."
• "Spring is the time of plans and projects."
• "Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished."
• "Spring is the time of rebirth and renewal."
• "To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow."
• "The sun has come out, and the air is vivid with spring light."
• "Spring breathes new life into the world around us."

Spring Quotes about Renewal and Growth -

Here are 20 spring quotes specifically focusing on renewal and growth:

• "Spring is the time of plans and projects."
• "Every flower must grow through dirt."
• "The earth laughs in flowers."
• "Spring unlocks the flowers to paint the laughing soil."
• "Bloom where you are planted."
• "The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance."
• "In the spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours."
• "Spring is nature's way of saying, 'Let's party!'"
• "The day the Lord created hope was probably the same day he created spring."
• "To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow."
• "Life stands before me like an eternal spring with new and brilliant clothes."
• "No matter how long the winter, spring is sure to follow."
• "Spring is a time of new beginnings and fresh starts."
• "Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished."
• "The first blooms of spring always make my heart sing."
• "Spring is a time for plans and projects."
• "Spring: the season of hope, renewal, and new beginnings."
• "Spring is the season of the soul's blossoming."
• "Let go of yesterday. Let today be a new beginning and be the best that you can."
• "Springtime is the land awakening. The March winds are the morning yawn."

Matthew 27:11-26~" Jesus stood before the governor: and the governor asked him, saying, Art thou the King of the Jews? And Jesus said unto him, Thou sayest. And when he was accused of the chief priests and elders, he answered nothing. Then said Pilate unto him, Hearest thou not how many things they witness against thee? And he answered him to never a word; insomuch that the governor marvelled greatly. Now at that feast the governor was wont to release unto the people a prisoner, whom they would. And they had then a notable prisoner, called Barabbas. Therefore when they were gathered together, Pilate said unto them, Whom will ye that I release unto you? Barabbas, or Jesus which is called Christ? For he knew that for envy they had delivered him. When he was set down on the judgment seat, his wife sent unto him, saying, Have thou nothing to do with that just man: for I have suffered many things this day in a dream because of him. But the chief priests and elders persuaded the multitude that they should ask Barabbas, and destroy Jesus. The governor answered and said unto them, Whether of the twain will ye that I release unto you? They said, Barabbas. Pilate saith unto them, What shall I do then with Jesus which is called Christ? They all say unto him, Let him be crucified. And the governor said, Why, what evil hath he done? But they cried out the more, saying, Let him be crucified. When Pilate saw that he could prevail nothing, but that rather a tumult was made, he took water, and washed his hands before the multitude, saying, I am innocent of the blood of this just person: see ye to it. Then answered all the people, and said, His blood be on us, and on our children. Then released he Barabbas unto them: and when he had scourged Jesus, he delivered him to be crucified.
These verses describe our Lord's appearance before Pontius Pilate, the Roman governor. That sight must have been astonishing to the angels of God. He who will one day judge the world allowed himself to be judged and condemned, though "he had done no violence, neither was any deceit in his mouth." (Isaiah 53:9.) He from whose lips Pilate and Caiaphas will one day receive their eternal sentence, suffered silently an unjust sentence to be passed upon him. Those silent sufferings fulfilled the words of Isaiah, "as a sheep before her shearers is silent, so he opens not his mouth." (Isaiah 53:7.) To those silent sufferings believers owe all their peace and hope. Through them they will have boldness in the day of judgment, who in themselves would have nothing to say.
Let us learn from the conduct of Pilate, how pitiful is the condition of an unprincipled great man.
Pilate appears to have been inwardly satisfied that our Lord had done nothing worthy of death. We are told distinctly, "that he knew that for ENVY they had delivered him." Left to the exercise of his own unbiased judgment, he would probably have dismissed the charges against our Lord, and let Him go free.
But Pilate was governor of a jealous and turbulent people. His great desire was to procure favor with them and please them. He cared little how much he sinned against God and conscience, so long as he had the praise of man. Though willing to save our Lord's life, he was afraid to do it, if it offended the Jews. And so, after a feeble attempt to divert the fury of the people from Jesus to Barabbas — and a feebler attempt to satisfy his own conscience, by washing his hands publicly before the people — he at last condemned one whom he himself called "a just person." He rejected the strange and mysterious warning which his wife sent to him after her dream. He stifled the remonstrances of his own conscience. He "delivered Jesus to be crucified."
Behold in this miserable man a lively emblem of many a ruler of this world! How many there are, who know well that their public acts are wrong, and yet have not the courage to act up to their knowledge. They fear the people! They dread being laughed at! They cannot bear being unpopular! Like dead fish, they float with the tide. The praise of man is the idol before which they bow down, and to that idol they sacrifice conscience, inward peace, and an immortal soul.
Whatever our position in life may be, let us seek to be guided by principle, and not by expediency. The praise of man is a poor, feeble, uncertain thing. It is here today, and gone tomorrow. Let us strive to please God, and then we may care little who else is pleased. Let us fear God, and then there is none else of whom we need be afraid.
Let us learn from the conduct of the Jews described in these verses, the desperate wickedness of human nature.
The behavior of Pilate afforded the chief priests and elders an occasion of reconsidering what they were about. The difficulties he raised about condemning our Lord, gave time for second thoughts. But there were no second thoughts in the minds of our Lord's enemies. They pressed on their wicked deed. They rejected the compromise that Pilate offered. They actually preferred having a wretched felon, named Barabbas, set at liberty rather than Jesus. They clamored loudly for our Lord's crucifixion. And they wound up all by recklessly taking on themselves all the guilt of our Lord's death, in words of portentous meaning, "His blood be on us and our children."
And what had our Lord done, that the Jews should hate Him so? He was no robber, or murderer. He was no blasphemer of their God, or reviler of their prophets. He was one whose life was love. He was one who "went about doing good, and healing all that were oppressed of the devil." (Acts 10:38.) He was innocent of any transgression against the law of God or man. And yet the Jews hated Him, and never rested until He was slain! They hated Him, because He told them the truth. They hated Him, because He testified of their works that they were evil. They hated the light, because it made their own darkness visible. In a word, they hated Christ, because He was righteous and they were wicked, because He was holy and they were unholy — because He testified against sin, and they were determined to keep their sins and not let them go.
Let us observe this. There are few things so little believed and realized as the corruption of human nature. Men imagine that if they saw a perfect person, they would love and admire him. They flatter themselves that it is the inconsistency of professing Christians which they dislike, and not their religion. They forget that when a really perfect man was on earth, in the person of the Son of God, He was hated and put to death. That single fact goes far to prove the truth of Edwards' remark — "unconverted men would kill God, if they could get at Him."
Let us never be surprised at the wickedness there is in the world. Let us mourn over it, and labor to make it less, but let us never be surprised at its extent. There is nothing which the heart of man is not capable of conceiving, or the hand of man of doing. As long as we live, let us mistrust our own hearts. Even when renewed by the Spirit, they are still "deceitful above all things and desperately wicked." (Jer. 17:9.)

I’ve been in the Spravato program since January. I absolutely loved my clinic at first. The staff is actually a family so it is a family owned and run clinic. The atmosphere was so warm that I ended up eventually making friends with a staff member who was often the one administering my medication and checking my blood pressure. We hit it off really well, like soul sisters (I’m sure being the one always there for my ketamine sessions accelerated the feeling of being soul sisters). We also had a lot in common and both lacked friends so an unlikely friendship was born.
I am thinking, well, might be complicated to navigate but I’m sure I can handle it. I need good friends who understand my mental health situation and in my logic at the time, who better? Well it gets more complicated because I found out during my last drive to the clinic that the woman I had made friends with (platonic, I’m also a woman and also not attracted to this person) hadn’t yet told her mom, who is my nurse practitioner, that we were hanging out outside of the clinic probably because she didn’t want her mom to be upset with her. There are 3 generations working there, a grandma, her daughters and then her granddaughter plus her daughter’s cousins.
She didn’t tell me she didn’t tell her mom until I was already in the Uber on the way to the clinic and I had to make a decision whether to be dishonest with my nurse practitioner or not. At the time, she said it was just her anxiety kicking up and that it would be fine if I told her mom, but it felt like she wanted to be the one to tell her so I decided to just let it slide. I then ended up having a panic attack during my session where my nurse practitioner, her mom, had to come in there and help ground me so I didn’t slip into a fit.
She said last night she was going to tell her mom because of me being uncomfortable and she didn’t want that to be a barrier to my treatment because she saw me in the panic attack initially before she got her mom (who is more experienced in severe mental health) to help me.
You would think all that is the reason I’m stopping but it turns out the main barriers to my treatment have been me being stupid enough to try to bring my husband to the clinic who has been abusive to me. My wrist still hurts from another bad fight we had where I was dumping out of his clothes on the floor and he decided to grab me and restrain me by the wrists. I had tugged and yanked and screamed for him to let me go because he was hurting me. He just held on harder and kept staring at me. He seems like he feels justified because I was throwing a fit in our bedroom, throwing all his clothes on the floor and wiping stuff off the dresser onto the floor. It was a really bad fight.
So then, my nurse practitioner, who I keep updated, and who has recently met my husband initially for an info session, was telling me that we “catastrophize” each other…..I tried to believe her but had a panic attack during my session following our talk because it feels like abuse, not like I’m demonizing my husband. And now I feel like she was only saying we are demonizing each other, because she needs our business since the clinic is new and family run. They have been extraordinarily happy since I left a glowing Google review because it followed a particularly bad review from someone who couldn’t get into the program.
Until now, I have felt very welcome there and looked forward to coming there every week but now I have canceled any future appointments because him leaving bruises on me IS abuse, it doesn’t matter if I’m to blame too, it’s still abuse and I can’t keep going somewhere that potentially wouldn’t call a spade a spade just so that they can keep their business going.
Oddly enough, I think I still want to carry my friendship with the daughter because her and I get along really well and she’s my first real friend in a long time. However, she has refrained from giving her specific opinion about my situation/husband and instead just tells me ambiguous stuff like that she is in my corner and that I just need to make sure I’m loving myself, etc. I don’t know if that’s because my husband might be a client there or if it’s because she also thinks I’m “catastrophizing” abuse.
This feels like a bit of a wild experience. I’ve now attached the whole social experience to the Spravato treatment and don’t really want to go to anymore ketamine treatments. Just the thought of going to a treatment now gives me anxiety. Really just the thought of walking into that clinic.
I think I could have handled the friendship with the daughter but when my nurse practitioner, her mom, said I was “catastrophizing” my husband after he literally left bruises on me that I was able to show her and still was planning on moving forward and seeing my husband as a client….it just stopped feeling like she genuinely cared and that it was all about the bottom line $$$ at the end of the day.
I’m just sad in general. My psychiatrist originally referred me to this place and I’ve told him how well it’s going. This place also referred me to my current disability lawyer so now I’m worried they will be difficult for my lawyer to work with since I’m withdrawing my client status over it all (I told them the reason through the chat portal and was polite but firm about why I was leaving)
Gosh I know this is a lot but does anyone have any advice?

You ever met a rich crackhead chick who’s parents bought her and her heroin addicted boyfriend a whole house, a new car, monthly allowance and seen it all come crashing down? This sounds like a fantasy, but it’s actually reality in the streets of Montgomery County, MD. This is the life of a rich crackhead named Amy.
Before I tell you about Amy, we gotta get the background first and go all the way back to 2021(if you want to skip and get right to Amy, just go to paragraph 11/12, but you’ll miss out on a lot). It’s the year 2021, I had just came back a couple months ago from pulling off EDD fraud. One day I was driving drop top mustangs in Malibu, the next I’m seeing my accounts get frozen and my money slowly begin to dwindle down. Before I knew it I was back in DC, broke and back to square one. Now from the time I was in Cali to the time I returned a lot of shit happened. I fell off with a lot of people, so I found myself hanging around an unusual crowd of people, the Bethesda kids.
You see before I dropped out of Towson University, I had met this nigga named LP, he was from Bowie and he went to school out Bethesda, but me and him got along because we had two things in common: we both liked DMV music, and we both liked to party our asses tf off. But that’s a story for another day.
You see LP put me on to a lot of people from Bathesda, I had never really hung around white folks before, and with the connections he gave me i made friends with a couple of crackas and even met my now deceased ex girlfriend. I was going to the craziest white functions and constantly turning up. But I saw more than a chance to have fun, saw this as a money making opportunity🤑 cha ching! And it was through LP that I met some friends who introduced me to a nigga named Swervy.
You see them white folks love to drink beer and smoke weed at parks, so one day I’m meeting up wit one of my good men, Ju. Ju is the typical school shooter typa fella, so it’s no surprise what I saw when I linked up with him at the spot. With him was this long haired European foreign exchange motherfucker whose name I forgot, and this bearded Eastern European nigga named Swervy, and he was wildin the fuck out. Mind you I’m from the projects, and all these bathesda niggas I’m meeting are rich ass motherfuckers who live in multi million dollar mansions. Keep in mind these cats may be rich, but everybody out bathesda is rich so these are basically the rejects. Pretty much the closest thing to a street nigga you can find out there.
As I’m getting introduced to some of these cats, Swervy pulls out a syringe. So I ask “Man wtf is this man doing,” “He’s shooting up fent” casually says Ju. That was the first time I ever witnessed someone shooting up a drug, and it wouldn’t be the last. Swervy would eventually become Amy’s boyfriend. And he was quite the yapper, he’s one of those motherfuckers who peaked in high school, and now he’s just watching his life come spiraling down, at least that is until he meets Amy…
In this meet up I learn a lot about Swervy. He was basically a kingpin at the age of 16-17. He would get shipments of 10’s of thousands of Xanax bars and sell them like hotdogs at a baseball game. These weren’t your regular junkies, these are the children of senators, buisness owners and lawyers. So you didn’t have to worry about a junkie saying he’ll pay you back, money was nothing to these crazy ass white folks. In the midst of all this yapping, I hear something that caught my attention.
“Yea so basically my cousins got like seven pounds of weed and 500gs of thc wax that they’ll give me if I can pick it up, it’s all the way in Arizona” Says Swervy.
🤑🤑🤑Cha mothafucking ching! This was the money I was talking about. Now driving cross country with pounds of weed and concentrate was risky, but shit I’d give my left nutsack for that kind of opportunity. And I might as well have, because a week later I was on my way to Tucson, with this Russian speaking drug addict I had just met the other day. Mind you I’m driving around in a red Lancer, with paper Vermont tags that I had printed online. I might as well Have went up to the police station and asked any of them if they wanted to buy drugs. My young naive dumbass didn’t realize the risk, all I was thinking about was 🤑🤑🤑 cha Ching!
I can sit here all day and tell you about that drive to Arizona, but imma keep it short and simple so we can get to this Amy chick. It was a fucking disaster, but we end up somehow making it back. We got the pounds and the concentrate, but it was all fucking shake! I’d be lucky to sell that shit for $100 a zip. Anyways, the trip opened my eyes to something, this nigga Swervy was a crashout crackhead dummy, and if I continue hanging out with him I was gonna end up dead or in jail. So I begin distancing myself, as I watched this man throw his life away from a far.
Now months go by, and at this point I’m like the street life ain’t for me and I’m working a job, I got a girlfriend and I’m staying low and just cooling it, with these pounds of weed that was so garbage, I was giving it away like charity donations. I had that goodwill pack! Just as things settle down that’s when Swervy comes back in contact with me. You see last time I had linked him, this man was overdosing off fent and we had to drive him to the hospital and save his life. But to my surprise, he was a changed man, or at least that’s what I thought...
He now has this girlfriend and he lives with her in germantown. You see me I’m baffled and curious, what crazy bitch would date this crazy motherfucker who’d probably sell his soul for one shot of heroin? I just had to find out. And when I met Amy I just didn’t know what to say. She was in her 30s and Swervy and me were in our early twenties. Amy was this slim, blonde hair, blue eyed Czechoslovakian chick who stood at about 5’7”. She wasn’t attractive by no means, you can tell the drugs did it’s toll on her, but if you’re drunk enough she can probably look fuckable. She had her degree in psychology from UMBC, but don’t be fooled her brain seemed like it was long fried. A conversation with her felt like a trip to the mental asylum. You will have better luck deciphering ancient Egyptian hyrogriphics before you can make sense of a word she says. Regardless I genuinely tried to get to know her. My guess was at some point in life she must’ve took a full sheet of acid and never recovered since. But she had her own two bedroom condo with a view of Sugarloaf mountain, a Pomeranian dog(which Swervy fucking hated), and a new jeep. So regardless I was impressed this crackhead motherfucker managed to bag her. So I asked him “Where did you find this shawty?” “At a hookah lounge in Rockville” he told me. That’s right folks, a fucking hookah lounge. Boi when I tell you after that, I was hitting up hookah spots like I had season tickets!
So I’m hanging out with them a lot now basically third wheeling, but Germantown was a long ass motherfucking drive, and I lived at the borderline to DC so I would even spend some nights in their guest bedroom. This Amy chick had parents that paid for her gas money and food, they had a fireplace and a balcony. And I can enjoy the comfort of all this as long as I occasionally bring some weed to smoke. And me I’m not one of those leeching ass bums, so the only time I’m hanging out with them is when I’m invited. And I got invited a lot, probably because Amy’s a bit cuukoo and Swervy had either robbed or scared off all his friends from Bathesda. He wanted someone to give him a break from her, a bro he can drink a beer with. So I would often times accompany them. One time we were at Buffalo Wild Wings, and as I sit across from both of them Amy begins playing footsies with me under the table. Of course I play it cool. I had no interest in her, mainly because Swervy hits raw and takes hepatitis medication, also having witnessed this man hold a bunch of homeless niggas at gunpoint in broad day light after I lost my phone at this gas station in Arizona. I can only imagine how he would react if he found out I smashed his girl.
A lot of the times I hung out with them, me and Swervy would talk about Amy. You see he’s not the type to hold back certain information, and as he’s telling me about his life and relationship that’s when it hit me. A nigga like me grew up all my life, with the world constantly kicking my ass and in a whole different realm of this life shit, you got these two rich kids who fucked up their life so much with so little consequences it became a culture shock to me. Me I caught a case and felt like my life was over, these two white people are disfunctional jobless drug addicts and they’re living the life I could only dream of having with years of hard work. I began to question the world, how many are there like this? Was my life a joke? I didn’t know where I was going hanging out with them, but if I couldn’t live the good life, I could at least witness it from the front row. I learned one thing about their relationship, Amy was basically getting old and low on options, and her parents supported her. Why? Because she’s not running around getting dicked down by a bunch of drug dealing black men anymore. Here they see this young white man, who’s also Eastern European who makes their highly mentally damaged daughter feel secure. And Swervy could win an Oscar, I mean what a fucking performance! One second he goes from Angus Cloud on Euphoria, the next a good suburban white kid the second he meets her parents. In fact he had convinced them that he was such a good man, even went to family gatherings and all, that they decided, let’s just buy them a full blown house.
That’s right, a FULL FUCKING HOUSE. I’m talking about a three story townhouse in Germantown, with a fully furnished basement, a patio, a balcony, a grill, 4 bedrooms, a 70 inch television, a paid off brand new fully insured jeep, they’re talking about trips to Italy. And that’s only the tip of the iceberg. Fool, are we living in a simulation? I couldn’t fucking believe my eyes, Swervy had pulled off the ultimate finesse. He convinced this rich family that he was the one for their daughter. And the most hilarious thing about it is that he was no better than a crackhead heroin junkie you can find panhandling for money on the street. I couldn’t even be envious, no instead I had felt something inside of me, this sort of toxic motivation. I learned that you didn’t have to work hard in this life, you didn’t have to earn your living, no instead one day God can just drop this lonely damaged woman who’s family is fucking loaded right on your fucking lap. He was even talking about marrying her and having her kids. In fact he tried, but see he had a problem. His sailors couldn’t fucking swim. Maybe it was all the crack, cocaine and heroine. He was having trouble producing fertile sperm, and Amy was running out of time! And that was the peak of their relationship. He was this close to closing the deal, but when it was game time he fell short. All it is now is one of those memories in your head that’ll have you like “damn, what if…” almost like when you reminisce on a football game thinking about how things could’ve been different if that one play went right.
Look I’ll be honest, I sugarcoated a lot of things. They may have lived in a world of handouts, but that relationship was more toxic than a nuclear wasteland. There’s a lot of fucked up details that I’m choosing to leave out, the psychical and mental abuse from both sides, the drug use. He was a psychopath and she was controlling and halfway demented. There’s a saying “opposites attract” and these two motherfuckers were far from it. They were two trains headed on a full on collision, so it was only a matter of time before disaster struck, and boy did it strike. Within a year I had witnessed a once fun relationship, become episodes of Shameless. At one point we fell off, I don’t remember exactly why, probably because I was tired of constantly being involved in their nasty games, and once again I distanced myself from Swervy.
The last I heard of Amy, she had kicked Swervy out the house and he caught her giving the sloppy toppy at a local park to 3 guys. Some hoodlum niggas, and a skater dude with a face tatt. The last time I seen Swervy he was arms dealing and one day pulled out an AR-15 on me and threatened to shoot me. I heard he’s now locked up currently awaiting trial because he broke into her home. I have a feeling one day I’ll see him on the news with a crazy headline.
Anyways if you’re a real mothafucka, you made it all the way here. If you read the whole thing I hope you enjoyed the story, if you have any questions ask away. If you didn’t feel like reading all that shit then fuck you bitch!

Hello! So, as title says I've had two dreams in the past few months where I am taking a spot much like death. One where I would cook people a meal based on their life story, and another where people would come to me for a ritual that I would send them to the after life but would be a magical tattoo on someone. I've seen a few things about being dead or dying but I haven't seen anything about being the grim reapedeath. People I cooked for: Older Asian woman wearing black and gold A Black athlete wearing blue and white(baseball player judging by the swinging motions he made) Older Military Man European I believe A young girl wearing a gold and green prom dress Ritual dream had an orc man and a much older goblin woman. The phrase "It's a spiritual tombstone instead of a physical one" was said as her tattoo formed on his face

LINK

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1kbWBIneq5-J3-wU3ZLDWCCeuT-8bIqoG86mYh2kykYs/edit?usp=sharing

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2MD: VR Football Unleashed ALL☆STAR
A Fisherman's Tale
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After the Fall®
Airport Ground Handling Simulator VR
ALTAIR BREAKER
ALTDEUS: Beyond Chronos
Alvo
Amid Evil
Ancient Dungeon
Angry Birds VR: Isle of Pigs
Another Fisherman's Tale
Anshar 2: Hyperdrive
Arashi: Castles of Sin - Final Cut
Arcade Legend
Arcade Paradise VR
Arcaxer
Arcsmith
AREA MAN LIVES
Arizona Sunshine®
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Asgard's Wrath 2
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Audio Trip
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AVICII Invector: Encore Edition
Bad Dreams
BAM
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Black Hole Pool
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Car Mechanic Simulator
Carly and the Reaperman
Carve Snowboarding
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Cave Digger
Cave Digger 2 Dig Harder
Cities: VR
Clash of Chefs VR
CleanSheet Soccer
Colossal Cave
COMPOUND
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Contractors Showdown
Cook-Out
CookieRun: The Darkest Night ~ Chapter1 ~
Cooking Simulator VR
Cosmodread
Cosmonious High
Crashland
Crazy Kung Fu
Creed: Rise to Glory - Championship Edition™
Crimen - Mercenary Tales
Crisis Brigade 2 reloaded
Crumbling
Cybrix
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Dead Effect 2
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Death Horizon: Reloaded
Death Lap
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Demeter
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Dragon Fist: VR Kung Fu
Dragon Front Rising
Drop Dead: Dual Strike Edition
Drop Dead: The Cabin
Drums Rock
Drunkn Bar Fight
Dungeons Of Eternity
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Electronauts
Eleven Table Tennis
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End Space
Eolia
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Eternal Notre-Dame
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Exorcist: Legion VR
Eye of the Temple
Figmin XR Mixed Reality
Final Space VR - The Rescue
First Person Tennis - The Real Tennis Simulator
Five Nights at Freddy's: Help Wanted
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Flight 74
Floor Plan 2
Flow Weaver
ForeVR Bowl
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Gambit!
Garden of the Sea
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Ghostbusters: Rise of the Ghost Lord
Ghosts of Tabor
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Golf 5
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GORN
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GRID Legends
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Gun Club VR
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Hello Neighbor: Search and Rescue
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Holopoint
Homestar VR: Special Edition
Homeworld: Vast Reaches
HouseFlipper VR
Hubris
HUMANITY
Hunt Together
Chess Club
I Am Cat
I Expect You To Die
I Expect You To Die 2
I Expect You To Die 3: Cog in the Machine
iB Cricket
In Death: Unchained
Interkosmos 2000
Into the Radius
INVERSE
IRON GUARD
Iron Rebellion
Ironlights
IRONSTRIKE
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Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes
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Lucky's Tale
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Medal of Honor™: Above and Beyond
Medieval Dynasty New Settlement
Micro Machines: Mini Challenge Mayhem
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Mixture
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MultiBrush
MVP Football - The Patrick Mahomes Experience
Myst
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NFL PRO ERA
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Ninja Legends
No More Rainbows
Not For Broadcast
OhShape
Omega Pilot
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Outta Hand
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Paradiddle
Paranormal Activity: The Lost Soul
Path of the Warrior
PathCraft
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Pixel Ripped 1978: An Atari Adventure
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Premium Bowling
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Recombination Anniversary Edition
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Rezzil Player
Richie's Plank Experience
Robo Recall: Unplugged
Rooms of Realities
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RUSH
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Sam and Max: This Time It's Virtual!
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Shadowgate VR: The Mines of Mythrok
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Sky Climb
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Swarm
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Table of Tales: The Crooked Crown
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The Signifier
The Tale of Onogoro
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The Walking Dead: Saints & Sinners - Chapter 2: Retribution
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Track Craft
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UBOAT: The Silent Wolf
Ultrawings
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Until You Fall
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Virtuoso
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Waltz of the Wizard
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Warhammer 40,000: Battle Sister
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We Are One
WHAT THE BAT?
Windlands
Windlands 2
Wings 1941
World Of Mechs
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Wraith: The Oblivion - Afterlife
YUKI Space Ranger
Yupitergrad
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Zero Caliber: Reloaded
Ziggy's Cosmic Adventures
ZOMBIE BAR SIMULATOR
Zombieland: Headshot Fever
ZOOKEEPER : Blast Quest
Zooma: Deluxe Edition

Maybe hate is a bit strong, but I (18) am getting sick and tired of my friend's (19) low prioritization of me. This will probably end up being a little long and I'm sorry in advance, I just don't have anyone to talk to about this. Reddit kinda scares me but I really need some kind of third party advice, and maybe to vent a little. I'll keep the context as brief as possible, but I think a little bit of history is necessary to understand why I'm so irked. If you don't want to read it, though, it'll still make sense, so you can skip the next paragraph if you want.
Context: We've been friends since about 13 and have talked about every day for years, even if only for an hour or so. We bonded over our shared creativity of original characters and that's what's been the bulk of our conversation topics through the years, but we also talk about our lives and share events whenever something interesting or significant comes up. We'll also share smaller things like pictures of our pets. Typical stuff. I'm a very studious person, I prioritize schoolwork over friendship, but even when I'm in the midst of finals I've always made an effort to at least say hi in the chat every day, and for a long time we still talked for hours multiple times a week. I was literally doing assignments from 3 PM until 1 AM for years. Last year, I was completely drowning in schoolwork, and communicated so. For those 4 months or so, we didn't talk nearly as often, and that was the first occurrence of us losing daily communication for an extended period of time. Back to how our main conversation topic is our OCs, my friend--who I'll call Avery--started talking more to a friend--who I'll call Casey--that they had for a couple years and made a new OC world to talk about with them, point-blank telling me while we were hanging out that they needed someone to get their OC fix from. That was fine and understandable, basically just another way of saying they needed a friend to talk to more often. At that point school had lessened and we started talking a little more again. Except from that point on, conversation started to fall more and more on me. They no longer thought of "things" about their characters to tell me, which we'd both do frequently before. They no longer had anything interesting about their day to tell me. I had to reach out first a lot of the time, and when it was their turn to say hello they'd take a couple days. And it sucks a little, because they've effectively replaced me. Not even "almost," it's pretty literal.
Now fast forward to present, it's been about six months and school has been a lot easier. I mean I've had more time to myself than ever before and I actually have weekends again (who knew college would be easier). Avery didn't go to college, but has been helping their grandma out and living with her. Avery and Casey are now dating. Casey is very sweet, I like her, I have nothing against her at all. She's the best girlfriend Avery has had so far and they seem very happy. It's Avery I'm pissed at. I still reach out whenever it's my turn, but I am the one to think of conversation and Avery hasn't thought of a single thing to tell me about their life in the past two months. Casey is very clingy, and seems to message Avery multiple times a day, to which they'll respond and it seems like, from what I can tell, they talk almost every day. We haven't talked about our characters in months, and that singular occurrence that prevents that from being longer was short. Our conversations are often stilted by responses that are hours apart and dry responses that I can't continue the convo with. When I do the dry responses back, they don't bother trying to pick up the convo, but do another dry response and toss the ball back into my court. It's fucking tiring. Just last week they went to a convention and got a tattoo, but I didn't hear anything about this until we met up today and they only showed it to me after my mom pointed it out. Their first tattoo was of my art (which was sweet), but I would've thought that getting another would be something notable enough to tell me? They showed me art they've done recently this time meeting up, and pulled it from a recent chat with Casey where they shared it with her. It's pretty clear she's the first one they go to with anything notable enough to talk about now, and I'm left with the "No, I don't really have anything to talk about"s.
The thing that makes this tricky is that I've talked to them about this several times before, and they acknowledged that they've been bad at reaching out, and implied that I'm still their favorite person and they try to prioritize me (which I did not ask, they said on their own). When we meet in person we get along great, but talking online is fucking abysmal now. They are a very flaky person in general, with low general drive to do anything and a low attention span. I think a lot of this is that their girlfriend simply takes up a lot of brain space, and whatever duties they have helping out their grandma takes up a lot of their time. But I'm still pissed off because I've always made an effort to talk to and spend time with them, as much as I can, and I KNOW they have more time than I did then and have more than enough wiggle room in their schedule to make an effort to maintaining a friendship with them. Part of this might be that they take me for granted; we've been friends for a long time, and they probably don't think I'll ever fully leave their life. Maybe they're right, because our moms are friends. But I'm less attached than they probably think I am and I'm willing to drop them. I just don't know if I should really give them up yet, especially because of all the history between us. All I know is if this goes on much longer I'm going to, because now it's summer break and we have all the time in the world. If they can't make an effort now, they never will.